#whether you've interacted with me a lot or you're completely silent

[dusty-pistol]

Alright, another explanation post since my friends and I are NOT gonna be made the villains here. Not after everythin angelfangz has done

First of all, I'm glad Kuiper apologized to those they have harmed, but they've went about this in such an immature way that it only comes off as condescendin. So here I am to state my piece on the matter. Feel free to show him this, I could really care less since he knows he's in the wrong. I'm merely doin this to clear my name and my friends names. He can't defend himself anymore.

First of all, let's focus on what was said in the doc. Yes, I put information in the initial post because I figured it'd be best to show how Will and TimeKeeper felt about that RP yall did. I admit that it was a baseless accusation, and I shouldn't have included it because I was never a part of the RP. But again, I figured it'd be important to show how uncomfortable those two were in RPin with Kuiper. Do not claim Will and TimeKeeper (or me) are the disgustin ones for gettin those vibes from the way YOU interpreted the characters. These are kids, and you're an adult. Be better and more mature and take responsibility.

Next, what was said in the post when angelfangz/xxheyitzvinc3ntxx posted the doc. I agree, this should have been private and we should've talked this out. But you blocked me, so that was quite literally impossible. But even so, I'm glad I made that callout because it helped people. It helped people know what you've done, let them know not to trust you, and it brought light to all the fucked up things you've done so everyone can stay safe and away from you. And sure, you apologized for what you said and did, but that doesn't negate the fact that you've hurt people in the first place. Its up to them whether they forgive you or not.

Secondly, no, that's not how this started. Don't lie. This started because you made people uncomfortable, I was made aware of the things you've done, and eventually, you blocked me when you found out what I said about bein uncomfortable around you and wantin to block you. And then I decided to call you out for what you've done because I was ashamed of bein silent and complacent when I could be out here lettin people know what a danger you are so they can keep themselves safe and away from you.

And in my defense, I've said before that I was too SCARED to speak up about my discomfort around you beforehand. I never meant to lead you on, and I never wanted to be friends after I learned about what you did. I didn't know about what you did until AFTER we had already started to be genuine friends. Afterward, though, I didn't know what else to do. I felt frozen like a deer in headlights (no pun intended).

I have severe social anxiety, and it takes a lot for me to be able to find the courage to speak up about my own discomfort. Usually, I just try to push through it for the sake of other people. And that's what I did for you, because I thought maybe you'd change. Which, of course, you didn't. I admit it was wrong of me to pretend to be your friend, I'm mature enough to admit to my mistakes. And for that, I'm sorry. I never meant to hurt or betray you in doin so. But I will not apologize for feelin uncomfortable around you in the first place.

And that WOULD conclude this clarification post, but I have one more thing to say. In your post about your Joe RP blog, you added this.

"I don't want to interact with ask-harry-fitzgerald either, but if the mod comes to me first, I wouldn't be opposed."

So you'd still interact with a minor you engaged in a suggestive/NSFW RP with even AFTER everythin? You really haven't changed. I don't care if you claim any possible future RPs with them would be completely SWF or not. The fact that you're still willin to interact with someone you've put in danger is vile and sickenin. I'd say I'm disappointed in you, but I suppose I shouldn't be surprised given your track record.

So yes, now that I've cleared my name of any allegations thrown at me (even though I shouldn't have to), let me say this. Kuiper, if you're readin this, get off the internet. Your little "break" wasn't long enough. Stop interactin with minors and go get help for your mental problems. I know it's alright for adults to interact with minors as long as they're doin it in a safe, non-sexual/romantic manner, but you've proven you cannot be trusted to safely interact with minors.

Get off the internet, go to the mental hospital like you said you would, and maybe then come back once you're in a stable enough mind and on the medication you need. I don't mean any of this in any malicious way, as I merely want everyone to stay safe and well. Even you, Kuiper. Despite all the things you've done and our differences, I still want you to get the help you deserve because you need it. So again, go get that help. Leave, and maybe if you're more mentally stable and mindful, you could come back. But for now, you need to go.

[william-o]

I participated in the Seasons of Gensokyo Zine!

I'm back once again in a collaboration Gensokyozine to share a fic I've made for their zine! Last year I wrote two short poem pieces but this year I did something I rarely do and wrote a whole short story!

You can read my piece on its own on ao3 here! But I highly recommend looking and reading all the amazing pieces this new zine has to offer!

I have quite a bit to talk about for this piece I wrote, it's been a journey! If you're interesting keep reading below!

So I knew there was going to be another event like this this year but I had no idea what the theme would be until the announcement was made. When I heard it was going to be based on seasons it was actually pretty tough figuring out a story revolving around that. I was also determined to write more than just a poem this time around so it had to be somewhat substantial.

Thankfully in the application where we had to pitch our idea there were a few topic examples provided, one of which involved using a story involving cicadas. So I started to do some research on cicadas, and what I found as a source of inspiration was a story about Cicadas by Lafcadio Hearn. Perhaps you've heard about him? Me being a *somewhat* superstitious individual saw it as a sign that this is what I was to write about for the seasons of gensokyo zine!

With further research I discover the existence of Dog Day Cicadas. They share the name of the shot type in the extra stage of Hidden Star in Four Seasons, they have folktale of how they're a sign of the end of summer and beginning of the next season, and strictly as a bonus for myself they're green and black just like me! It sounds like a story perfect to feature Yukari!

Now one of my biggest fears about writing a fanfic is completely misinterpreting a character. So I did all I could to try to get Yukari written just right. My idea was that it was most common in Gensokyo that people hated the sound cicadas make, except for Yukari. I was however advised that I needed some kind of reason that Yukari would like the sound cicadas make, or some kind of justification. Thankfully I found just what I needed in Chapter Five of Cage in Lunatic Runagate where Yukari states "The moon was unthinkably silent compared to the Gensokyo that was constantly noisy from bickering between humans and youkai. ~ Whether it was decay or pure heaven, I hated it. I needed the noise of the city." Close enough in my book to say that Yukari prefers noise over silence whether it be from people, a city, or cicadas.

Now when it comes to Son Biten, I didn't pressure myself as much to try and get her character right as I did with Yukari. She is one of the newest characters after all so there was less material to analyze her character. Although if I were to criticize myself about this fic, it would be that she's only there to be a plot point. I'll admit, I only really wanted her in here as a way to have the great sage equal to heaven and gensokyo and an actual sage interact. I will say I did a little bit of research to Son's personality, but I more or less just had her trying to do her best pretending to live up to the title she gave herself (Even though her character is more than just that).

And for good measure at the end I threw in a poem, this time in the tanka form (5-7-5-7-7). This was overall a lot of fun to write! I tried to format the story as a whole similar to a Hifuu story as well as the "A Beautiful Flower Blooming Violet Every Sixty Years" story. Speaking of Hifuu, I did throw in a little reference to Taboo Japan Disentanglement, did you happen to catch it? Well I hope you enjoyed my little story, I'm gonna go order some pizza and I'll see you again next year! (Hopefully!)

[lord-squiggletits]

MegOP questions *3 (and great news that you're feeling a bit more like writing them again, though it transpires that I do also love your Pharma...):

(a) what's an in-joke between the two of them; the sort of thing that will make one of them smile for what seems like no reason from the outside?

(b) your idea of M very subtly teasing OP and turning him on really gets to me; I suspect neither one is as discreet as they think, though, so what does that look like from the outside?

(c) You've argued in the past that OP makes on-page peace offers: what's your guesstimate for why they don't work out, at least early in the war?

(A) In-jokes between them:

Honestly, I've sat here for a while at a loss of how to answer this lol, I'm not really good at coming up with inside jokes since (naturally) I'd need some sort of context or specific events to references that would make them HAVE material for "inside" jokes specifically.

I suppose Chaos Theory's conceit always works: they reminisce a lot over all the ways they've nearly killed each other, and (to add a bonus for the next question) other people find this particularly shocking to watch Optimus participate in, since he's supposed to have a more dignified, anti-violence aspect to himself. I suppose that just means that Optimus' responses to Megatron's jabs are way more subtle in the references they make, giving the impression that they're playing a game together but Optimus is the one keeping his composure while Megatron has the goal of breaking it (even if it's just to make Optimus laugh at something impolite or snark back in irritation).

(B) Outside view of elaborate courtship rituals:

I think depending on the person, it's variable as to how much they perceive the flirting happening and whether they notice the sexy vibes to it.

A lot of the times I'd say people do notice (the only people who don't would be like, complete neutrals like Camiens and other colonists), but they don't get more than a sense that Megatron and Optimus are having some sort of silent conversation expressed entirely through pointed stares and paperwork. I'm sure that to even casual onlookers, it's very obvious that M and OP talk/interact in a way that's clear they're having whole invisible conversations.

As for people who perceive the more flirtatious elements? It's honestly variable because I have different Schrodinger's headcanons about Megatron and Optimus' sexual behavior/vibes depending on the specific scenario I want to write. But I suppose in general I'd go from the perspective of "Megatron and Optimus have sexual tension, but they still behave with decorum publicly and keep such personal things to private places." I think there'd actually be a decent mix of people who know them well and perceive/don't perceive the sexual intent going on, as well as vice versa. I'm pretty sure High Command on both sides recognizes it and finds it incredibly annoying (Prowl, Starscream, Soundwave) and Optimus has at least one personal friend (Ratchet, also Ironhide but that's less explored in IDW) who knows him well enough to know when he's being stupid as hell. Megatron on the other hand has few to no personal relationships, much less lets his emotions show, so I think he has the advantage in that people don't perceive Megatron as the kind of person that has feelings/desires and so they don't notice as a result.

But the subtle and elaborate courtship rituals probably become more obvious whenever Optimus has a visibly irritated/flustered vibe and Megatron looks unusually smug/satisfied. I imagine it leaves people equally bewildered as they are grossed out; bad enough that Megatron and Optimus were flirting publicly to begin with, but they were doing it with such weird, tiny signs that they were doing it right in front of other people? During meetings and conversations? And the onlookers just have to deal with the fact that M and OP constantly bounce off silent/invisible flirtations at all times? The psychic damage...

(C) OP's peace offers and why they didn't work:

I imagine the biggest sticking point was on foreign policy related to colonization and dealing with organics. For all his flaws and evil, I do think Megatron genuinely believed that there was no peace to be found with organics and that the best thing for Cybertron would be to preemptively attack and grow Cybertron's power. OTOH, Optimus is completely opposed to such imperialistic methods even if they would have the benefit of helping out Cybertron's homeland security. Setting aside the obviously moral choices, I think purely in terms of policy, OP and M wouldn't be able to compromise on that: OP wouldn't be able to accept continued/worsening bad relationships with the galactic community, and M wouldn't be able to accept leaving Cybertron to languish/decay for the sake of appeasing other species/empires who hate them. Even before Cybertron was made completely uninhabitable, from the early days of the war resource scarcity was a huge deal, and population exodus severely cut Cybertron's manpower down, so I think a lot of peace treaties would fall apart sheerly on the basis of Megatron and Optimus not being able to agree on what the goals/policies/actions of a unified Cybertron should be.

Then there's also the pre-war tensions of the issues with Optimus being a Prime, lots of the Autobots being part of the existing government that the Decepticons rebelled against, even the New Institute being a thing still thanks to Prowl. Then the crimes the Decepticons committed, not only against organics (which as mentioned before, M would be pissed about crimes towards organics being weighed as equal to crimes against Cybertronians) but also their flagrantly destructive and reckless actions as individuals (since Megatron regularly employs and encourages soldiers that do crazy shit like blow up energon refineries, start gladiator death pits, and just randomly attack whole planets for the fun of it). Negotiations would MAJORLY fall apart in that regard: if they reconcile, who gets punished and who doesn't? Who gets to keep their leadership positions and who doesn't? What about the fact that both factions have hair-trigger tempers and will perceive every suggestion of punishment as an attempt by the other faction to dominate them or punish them disproportionately?

I know that's all just political stuff and not really MegOP in the sense of personal interactions, but given who M and OP are as people, I think the political differences are fundamental to however their personal relationships could/would develop, since not only are they tied to their personal convictions as people, but political policy is also tied to the obligations they have towards their respective armies (countries, in a sense). I mean, OP not wanting to compromise on organics is tied to his beliefs related to freedom and equality, and M not wanting to collaborate with Autobots is tied to his trauma and political beliefs concerning the previous regime. Though it is interesting to consider whether M and OP coming to a peace agreement would happen because of changing personal beliefs allowing them to compromise on policy, or if compromises on policy force them to adopt new routines which then slowly change their worldviews in order to deal with it?

[traumasurvivorshelpingsurvivors]

tw: sa (csa?), coercive control, physical and verbal abuse, brief mentions of suicide/self-harm/ED

seeking support, validation, advice

Ten years ago, when I was 14, I was forced into a relationship with a boy I went to high school with. He was very mature for his age and i was very naive, and at the time I was left homeless due to my abusive father, possibly had an eating disorder; and I feel like he completely exploited my situation.

Over the span of six months sexual interactions were very frequent. He would force himself onto me and get violent and verbally abusive if I didn’t respond the way he wanted me to. He would hurt me and I would be too afraid to ask him to stop. I didn’t even know what consent was at the time; i was so afraid and I was completely frozen and always felt sick. I have so many gaps in memory too which I hate.

I wasn’t allowed to have friends and I was forbidden to go out anywhere. He admitted to wanting me to be jealous of him, as well as telling me how jealous i make him feel. He would embarrass me in public and trivialise everything I did. It became easier to just stop liking things.

He verbally and physically abused me multiple times, go through EVERYTHING on my phone, controlled what I wore, isolated me from everyone. Everything I did was always wrong. I had nowhere to go, no one to be with except for him. I had no control over my life. I became suicidal and started self harming which seemed to give him pleasure.

People around me just seemed to ignore everything, no one protected me or questioned anything he did.

He then broke up with me saying “You’re holding me back from my life” and that I “emotionally abused” him. So for years I felt like I was a really awful person. He then started dating one of my friends that he isolated me from as she was “not a nice person”. So this just added another layer of confusion and isolation.

For 10 years I’ve been struggling with unending anxiety, depression, guilt, nightmares, irritability, hypervigilance, social withdrawal, etc. He completely stripped me of all identity, i was nothing for so many years afterwards. He destroyed every friendship I had. And I only recently started to make progress on having confidence and identity as an individual and also accepting that he raped and abused me… but then all of a sudden he started following my mother and my old childhood best friend on Instagram - he also tried following my inactive, private account there too. I felt like my entire being was under threat again. I felt so ill. Just the entitlement he still feels he has over my life… even after all these years?? seriously?!

And I honestly don’t think he will ever understand what he actually did to me. Anytime I try to speak up against him people always defend him as if I’m just being bitter. Why would people choose him over me?

I feel more affected now than i did 10 years ago, and having him still lurking around makes me feel so unsafe and violated. I don’t know what he wants from me??

It just confuses me because we were pretty much the same age so I don’t feel valid in accepting it was csa. And also being so young and in a physically abusive relationship just seems so strange.

I have no one to talk to about this situation, i have no support network, and everyone likes him. ~ This is my first time speaking as I am so tired of being silent. I’m just so confused.

~ Rocky 🎀

Hi Rocky 🎀,

First of all thank you for sharing your story. It takes a lot of bravery and strength to come forward, and please know that we believe and support you.

I'm so sorry about what you've been through. It sounds like your abuser was controlling and manipulative, and I'm so sorry that you had to go through all of that. Please know you're not alone. I was in a remarkably similar situation.

It honestly doesn't matter whether or not he remembers what he did because it doesn't change the fact that he still did it, you know? Also I'm really sorry to hear that people have been defending him. Unfortunately there will always be people like this, but that also means that they aren't necessarily on the right side of things. You know the truth better than them.

If you can, blocking him and encouraging your friends and family to do so as well might help, but definitely keep an eye out and consider documenting anything he tries to do to you.

Please know that age gaps are not the only ways that abusers take advantage of their victims. Other factors can definitely play a part as well, such as gender, cultural or religious beliefs, language barriers, immigration status, substance abuse, physical disabilities, intellectual disabilities, economic dependence, geographical isolation, and a lack of a social support network.

I hope I could help. If anyone has any comments or suggestions, feel free to add on. Please let us know if you need anything.

-Bun

[jimlingss]

The Bachelorette

Words: 6.4k of absolute garbage.

Genre: Crack - but it’s more like trash.

Summary: A shit version of BTS members in the reality television show The Bachelorette. I tried.

Notes: Happy Two Years, folks! To commemorate the anniversary of this writing blog, I wanted to draw back to the first thing I’ve ever posted here, which was a garbage drabble. Hence, here is an equally garbage short fic! Enjoy!

The screen flashes to white and scarlet rose petals begin to fall from the blue sky. There’s a tickering laughter and a chiffon dress that drags against the sand, high heels stopping.

“She’s the entire package. Brains, beauty, strength, personality.”

“Beautiful.” “Stunning.” “Gorgeous.” “Incredible.” “The real deal.”

You radiantly smile, blinding those around you as another laugh spills from your lips. The lovely flowers fall upon your hair and skin, decorating your body and causing you to blink away the ones that tickle your visage. “I’ve waited my entire life for this. And I’ve never been more ready to find love.”

“Y/N is the most beautiful person I’ve ever seen in my entire life.”

“She could really be the one.”

“But there’s never love without war.” Instantaneously, the monitor switches to several screens, flashing back and forth between them. “And the most shocking moment in Bachelorette history-”

You’re sobbing and crying, throwing a lamp across the room that silences every man. “Do you even care about me?”

A person is seen shaking their head directly at the camera in a private room. “Tensions are rising and it’s becoming unbearable. I just think he’s not here for the right reasons. And if it were me, I would never hurt Y/N like that. I only need a chance to prove it.”

“I’m really going to fight you!”

“None of them care as much as I do.”

“I’m not here to play games. I’m here to find love.”

There’s a massive ‘boom’ sound effect and the camera pans down to a polished man in a suit, hands behind his back as he strides out of a garden at night. “Hi, I’m Chris Harrison. Welcome to an exciting new season of the Bachelorette. Over the years we’ve had a lot of Bachelors and Bachelorettes come and go. But never have we seen anything like this before.”

“Y/N, our new bachelorette, has it all. She has a stable career, friends and a loving family. But from one bad romantic relationship to the next, she’s given up on love. Almost. That’s where we come in. Y/N can not only find love right here but find hope again. Let’s take a closer look at our new Bachelorette.”

The scene changes again, this time directly on you doing various activities, from going to the gym to cooking in the kitchen to entering your workplace. “I’m L/N Y/N, I’m twenty five and this is my last chance to find love!”

“All my life, I’ve been searching for my Mr. Right to sweep me off my feet and I think now’s the time. I’m ready to embark on this journey to finding love and opening my heart up. Who knows, maybe I’ll fall head over heels for one of these men.” A tinkering giggle streams from your mouth, a charming grin to match. It fades to black.

The nervousness begins to ebb at your bones. The cool night breeze laces through the strands of your hair and the light fabric of your red dress, flowing between your legs. Despite claiming so many times that you’re prepared, you’re not so sure anymore. This might be the defining moment. One of these people might actually be it. This would be the story that you tell to your future children.

A nervous laugh breaks through your pink lips, bated breath held between teeth and from your spot by the front mansion doors, you can see a black limousine begin to drive up. Eventually, it pulls over by the curb and the door opens.

A man with a half-eye moon smile appears in a crisp suit, his round cheeks nearly bursting and he tips his black fedora as he walks up the steps towards you. “Evening, milady. You are the most beautiful lady I have ever seen in my entire life. Not even the stars shine as brightly as you do. You are my lady of the night.”

You laugh, already melting from his sweet words. “Oh, you’re too kind.”

The screen switches, flashing over to the man knotting his tie correctly in the mirror. His voice layovers his actions. “I’m Park Jimin, twenty six years old and I’m a dental hygienist. I’m also a part-time model but a full-time women respector. I don’t understand why women are so mistreated in our society and in our world. It’s such a shame but I’m not like that. All I want is to share my life with someone special and I think Y/N can be the one. I know out of all the guys, I’m the only one who can treat Y/N right.”

The stranger reaches out, taking the back of your hand and laying a gentle kiss with his plump lips. “My name is Jimin and I’m looking forward to getting to know you better.”

He comes across as sweet and his aura is warm. Immediately, you feel at ease and you match his wide smile. “Well then Jimin, I’m looking forward to getting to know you too. I’ll see you inside the house.”

With a smile still plastered across your face, you patiently await for the next car. Once it parks and the door opens, you're instantly blown away.

“Hey, babe.” He winks. “The name’s Kim Namjoon. I'm twenty eight, personal trainer and I'm tired of working out my biceps, I want to work out my heart next.” The monitor alters to the dirty blonde doing push-ups on the gym floor, flexing in the mirror as well, wearing a thin tank top and black snapback. “My ex was crazy and it really messed me up. I'll admit, in the past few years, I've been a serial romantic but I really think Y/N can change me. I really hope she gives me a chance and we can see where this goes.”

Dimples crease on each side of his cheek, locks swept away from his forehead, right above his brow and he digs his hands deep into his pants pocket, casually strolling up to you. “Damn baby girl, why do you look so sexy tonight?”

You blush. “You’re too sweet.”

Namjoon reaches behind into his pocket and pulls out a single red rose. “I know you’re the one who’s supposed to give me one, but I decided to be the one to give it to you this time. You’re not like the others, Y/N. You’re beautiful and I hope you can open your heart to me.”

Without waiting for a response, he opens his arms, giving you a light squeeze before putting the flower in your hand and whisking away inside the mansion. You’re left a little awestruck before you clear your throat, turning back to the open road and waiting for the next person. But as a few seconds draws out to a few minutes, you grow increasingly confused. There are no cars approaching, or the sound or wheels rolling on the asphalt road.

It’s only after the longest eternity that you catch a silhouette making its way up the path.

The man-...boy...well you couldn’t be sure what since he wasn’t wearing a suit but a black sweater with the hood draped on his head, practically covering his eyes, strides forward. He was gliding as he walked too, ghostly steps that made you blink twice, wondering if it was really a phantom that was about to be caught on television. “Umm...hello?”

You attempt to dip down to catch his eyes but he flinches away and you notice his adam’s apple bobbing up and down. “Hello.” His voice is smooth, melodic but quiet. “Nice to meet you.”

“My name is Jeon Jungkook.” There’s a dramatic sound effect and he’s found seated in a chair, in a dark corner with the curtains drawn. “I’m twenty four. Unemployed.” There’s more unsettling music that follows and he stares straight into the lense of the camera as if transfixed by his own reflection within it.

There’s a mysterious aura to him that you can’t quite put your finger on. But there’s no denying a slight magnetic attraction you feel towards the individual. Even from the corner of his hood, as you catch a slight smile of his lips, you feel your chest soaring. Though, it doesn’t last long.

He dips his head in a slight bow again and scurries away into the house, leaving you winded and speechless. You giggle at the strange behaviour but no sooner is the next person arriving, in a complete opposite fashion.

There’s loud drums that follow, people with instruments strapped onto their body. The tall man saunters up to you, dancing in a toilet costume. It’s ridiculous and makes you squeeze your stomach in laughter. “My name is Taehyung and I’ll take all the shit you throw at me!”

“Taehyung! Twenty seven and I’m a dental hygienist. In my spare time, I like to take long walks by the beach and write poetry. I like to play games and run around as well. All my life, I was never that great in school and even though my parents said it was okay, I still felt a missing piece in my life. It was only recently that I figured it out it wasn't about school at all but love. As long as Y/N sees me for who I am, I know she’ll like me!”

The strands of his brown hair poke out from his costume and you smile. “Looks like you’ll flush away my problems too, huh?” His boxy smile appears in return and he nods. You admit he’s a real cutie and you have to give him extra points on creativity, his hard efforts and how hard he made you laugh. He’s a funny one and it makes it all that more enticing. “I’ll see you inside.”

You’d never admit it, especially not when cameras are rolling a few meters away but you’re beginning to feel exhausted and overwhelmed, having been bombarded with handsome men for the past hour. Apparently there’s only three more left and you feel relieved but any exhaustion is quickly washed away when the familiar black limousine pulls up by the curb.

The door opens. You legitimately gasp aloud.

Tall. Dark. Handsome.

Anything you could’ve possibly wished for or imagined is put in a one package, one human. Your lashes flutter a few times, trying to make sure you’re not dreaming and the person smiles, buttoning up their suit and approaching the cobblestone steps in steady strides. He approaches you with a hesitant smile, the tips of his ears in a flaming hue of red and you bet your own cheeks are in the same exact shade.

“Hi.”

You nearly swoon right then and there. “Hi.”

“I’m Kim Seokjin.” He smiles and decides to shake your hand. His grasp is gentle, his smile a bit shy and perhaps even coy. Once he’s let go of you, you secretly yearn for his touch. “And I’m sorry but I don’t have any cheesy line or any special performance to show you. It’s just me.”

He shows himself in his most truest form, without any of the sparkles or pizzazz, any special one liners or winks. And somehow, it’s overpowering.

“Hello.” He smiles towards the audience, sitting straight in a chair. “My name is Kim Seokjin, I’m twenty five years old and I’m a dental hygienist. I’m not sure how I can describe myself. Um, I live a pretty mundane life. I go to work, come home and wind down but I really want to find someone special where I can share my life with. While I might not be one of the most exciting contestants this season, I really hope Y/N will be able to feel my sincerity. I’m looking for love and if she happens to be the right one, then I won’t hesitate.”

A childish, school girl giggle spills from your lips and you downcast your head, feeling too flustered to face him. “It’s alright. I don’t need anything, you’re already really sweet. Thank you.”

“I..umm…” He lingers for a second. “I guess I’ll see you inside.”

You hum, watching his backside disappear. “Yeah…”

There might be something there, you just can’t quite pinpoint it yet.

A man emerges from the bushes with a lopsided grin. “My name is Min Yoongi. I’m a twenty-five, a dental hygienist and I know Y/N is the one. I know it. I feel it. I even went a medium and our energy, it matches. Even our MBTI and our horoscopes. I didn’t say it, it’s written in the stars. It’s fate. We’re meant to be soulmates.”

Like his interview, Yoongi emerges from the bushes again by the side of the house and scares you shitless. You scream, jumping back, nearly twisting your ankle from the high heels and you put your hands over your chest, hyperventilating. He’s a bit short-statured but manages to climb over the railings and to the front door. You’re taken back, laughing nervously. “How long were you there for?”

“A while but it’s fine.” He’s without a suit jacket, his white shirt a bit marred from the dirt but he brushes it off, taking a leaf off his mop of black hair. Maybe you should feel a bit scared or be on guard but he has a rather cute aura, rounded cheeks and sleepy eyes. At the very least, he took the word ‘surprise’ with quite a literal meaning.

“Hello, L/N Y/N. My name is Min Yoongi and I’m convinced we’re meant to be.”

“Really now?” You chuckle, put a bit more at ease. “And why is that?”

“Because you’re the most beautiful soul I have ever met and astrology says so. Our ascendants and our venus signs match. The entire constellation graph works. Our MBTI are compatible, even our chinese horoscope claims so.”

You quirk your head to the side, brows furrowing a bit. “How do you know my birthday?”

Yoongi smirks lowly, his voice dropping to a vibrating timbre. “I know a lot of things about you.” He continues before you can further question him, “I already prepared our marriage certificate so the last barrier we need to overcome is this show. Are you ready to conquer this with me?”

“I-…” You nod. “I guess so.”

“Great.” He smiles, giving a gummy grin. “I’ll catch you later then, Y/N.”

The producer a little ways off appears appalled, expression twisted up in distaste but you give a small giggle. You liked all kinds of people, even if they were a bit bizarre and at this point, you were open up to anyone. There was one more person as well, so you try not to let your thought stray too off much and you stay within the present moment, waiting as the black car pulls up.

Unusually, however, it takes a few minutes for the door to open and when it does, the man is seen finishing up some kind of business phone call. As he walks up the steps, he bids the other person on the line farewell, pockets his mobile device and pulls off his sunglasses to meet you. “Hello. I’m Jung Hoseok, entrepreneur and business owner of my own startup company. It’s called Pink Panties, an underwear company. We make it out of the softest fabric-” he turns directly to the camera. “-and the official online shopping website will be launched in 2019.”

“That’s highly impressive.” Being career-oriented yourself, it’s nice to find someone who‘s ambitious as well. When he replies with ‘I’m fully aware’, you laugh.

The man throws his jacket over his shoulder, striding out the door at a quick pace and a million calls blowing up his phone. “I’m Jung Hoseok, entrepreneur and business owner at my own startup company for an underwear company. It’s called Pink Panties, similar to Pink Panther, the movie. Don’t worry, we’re in the process of being patented but we’re a legitimate company and we have many satisfied customer reviews-”

The interview gets cut short.

With no more men to meet, you brace yourself before entering the mansion where all seven contestants will most likely be in the living room, already scouting each other up and sizing the competition. All of them are so vastly different, captivating you in different ways, you’re not so sure what to think. Your brain is jumbled but there’s one thing that you are sure of-

Someone in this room is going to be your future husband.

For the next few days that pass, you spend as much time as you can with the boys, going on dates from each of them. All of the dates are at different venues, from luxurious restaurants to a special locations up the mountains. As you suspect, each of them have their own set of charms and at this point, you don’t know who you like more. All of them have their own qualities.

“I really enjoyed the helicopter ride with Y/N,” Hoseok muses and nods during his interview. “Being up there with her, it felt like we were on top of the world together and we really had a connection. For the first time, I really felt something. I can feel my walls coming down with her. More importantly, my underwear from Pink Panties never once shifted-”

Taehyung gulps, holding your hand while the sun sets and he nearly bumps into the metal pole. You laugh and he sheepishly smiles, scratching the back of his neck.

“The date was awesome but I didn’t get a chance to open up.” Taehyung grimaces, a somber expression written across his face. “It’s just so hard to talk about yourself. I get a bit overwhelmed because Y/N is just so pretty. She should put a bag over her head so I can concentrate better.”

On another outing, Jungkook sits a few meters away from you, his hat doing a good job of covering his face and you can’t even see his eyes from his long brunette bangs. There’s a bit of silence as you watch him and he stares back at you.

During the interview, he says only one thing towards the camera. “I’m really falling for her.”

Of all the men, however, you feel the most disconnected with Namjoon. He’s one of the most brazen and bold when it comes to approaching you, always dropping sweet lines out of nowhere, but you feel he hides his core personality. He’s distant and you’re not sure how to approach it.

“Can I tell you something personal? It’s because my ex was crazy.” He explains as the two of you sit at a bench outside, having your alone time with each other. “It really did some damage to me and I don’t know. I guess I just have a fear of falling in love.”

Your lips are pouty, eyes concentrated on his profile and you hum, acknowledging his tough past.

“Oh please.” Jimin rolls his eyes, tipping his black fedora. “Namjoon is an asshole and he doesn’t know how to treat ladies the way they deserve. He obviously doesn’t know how to treat Y/N they way she deserves. He plays around with women’s feelings and I would never do that. He’s not here for the right reasons.”

“Namjoon.” You reach out to graze his hand and his pupils connect with yours. “Do you trust me?”

There’s a pause and the corner of his mouth draws up into a blazing smile. “Of course I do, baby girl. You're not like the others, Y/N, and I’ve changed. You’ve changed me.”

You stand up, tugging him along and the two of you laugh together. “Then follow me.”

The two of you end up going to a place to skydive. You’ll be falling from the sky to overcome his fear of falling in love. “I feel like this will help us become closer.”

As ridiculous as it may seem, it turns out to be quite fun. It takes a lot of courage to take a step, off the plane but you both cling to your instructors and the adrenaline pulses through your veins. The wind whips through your hair and you scream in excitement. You can also hear his shouts from a ways off but soon, he joins your height and the both of you smile towards each other.

“It was one of the best experiences.” Namjoon breathes out in the interview, “I can really see my walls coming down with her. I thought we really had a connection.”

But it’s not always about you and the dates.

“That kid Jungkook is fucking weird.” Yoongi gives a disgusted expression, lowering his voice into a whisper. “He gives me the creeps.”

Jeon Jungkook is mumbling to himself in the kitchen corner, fiddling with something on a napkin. The moment Seokjin steps into the area, he slams into a moldy scent that singes off his nose hairs. He immediately pinches his nostrils, approaching in slow steps. “Umm...what are you doing?”

The boy in the black hood doesn't respond, simply muttering something incoherent. Jin frowns, swallowing hard. “P-pardon?”

“It's mung beans.” He says and scowls, drifting away from the are and holding the napkin straight to his chest. He enters the dark bedroom and stares at his competition for a minute straight through the crack before shutting the door.

“I’m not here to make friends,” he says during the interview. “I’m here for Y/N.”

As if the tension wasn’t high enough, one day, as you’re chatting with Jin on the sofa, there’s sudden banging on the front door that jolts you up. There’s shouting and screaming that follows, security guards sworming in front of the mansion. And you exchange one look with your current partner before heading upwards, skedaddling behind the other contestants. “What’s going on?”

There’s a slight tug of the corner from Namjoon’s mouth but you don’t notice the discrete movement, not when the rest of his features are appalled. “Taehyung has a girlfriend.”

“What?!”

The cameramen and women are all rushing to capture the scene while the lense practically pokes you in the cheek to take in your surprise and disgust. The other men are obviously completely enjoying the chaos and you all leave the house to watch the commotion by the entrance.

There’s an unfamiliar girl in a pink dress, somehow having climbed over the gate and she’s shrieking at a disorientated Taehyung. “You bitch bastard!”

“Mindy, what are you doing here?” He’s confused, a bit ditzy in the way he quirks his head to one shoulder, blinking innocently like he hasn’t done anything wrong at all.

“Why the fuck do you think I’m here?!” She marches up to him, taking her fist and whipping her arms uselessly at him. Taehyung lets out a few cries of pain and jumps up, just in time for security to grab her. “You lied to me, Taehyung! This isn’t your grandmother’s house!”

“I-uh…” He gulps. “I broke up with you, Mindy. It doesn’t matter.”

“What the hell?!” She fights against the men holding her back but they obviously don’t drag her away, allowing more screen time for this drama to unfold. “You didn't say shit to me! You just texted me that you were leaving and that was it!”

“Umm…” He sheepishly grins. “Oops?”

“What the-” She fights against the security but they finally restrain her from damaging his poor handsome face. “You know what? Go fuck yourself, Taehyung!”

With that, the so-called Mindy is taken and all the cameras point towards the man called and your own stunned expression. The guys try to comfort you, some of them obviously satisfied, but to no avail does it help you.

Namjoon throws his head back, giggling and laughing during the interview. “My god, Taehyung’s an absolute idiot.”

Jimin shakes his head, the fedora on his head shifting with the movement. “That’s not how you treat a lady. That right there is the complete opposite. I don’t think Taehyung or any of these people are here for the right reasons because I would never treat Y/N that way. A real man wouldn’t treat a lady like that.”

As the pandemonium settles down and you find yourself on the sofa in the living room, head in your hands, the others take their chances to swarm and insult the man in question. It’s a serious meeting and you’re nearly in tears, a sense of betrayal overwhelming you. You’ve been on dates with Taehyung, a man that may potentially be your husband, and here he is, having lied to not only you but someone else. That could’ve been you.

“Y/N...” The one that’s caused you so much pain approaches into the spacious, modern living room and the other contestants immediately stand up. “Can I steal you for a second?”

“Hey!” Jimin shoves Taehyung and blocks his way before he can get to you. “Don't talk about her like that! That's not how you treat a lady.”

“It’s fine, Jimin.” You lift your head out of your hands, standing and the sea of men reluctantly parts for you.

Taehyung eyes gaze into yours and he clears his throat. “I have something important to tell you.”

“Okay.” You allow him to take you away privately to the gazebo outside of the garden. There’s space between your bodies, one that he maintains out of respect and you prepare for what he’ll say. “What is it?”

“I wanted to say sorry.” Taehyung manages a soft smile. “Things are really complicated and she’s an ex. I broke up with her before I came here. Things weren’t good for a long time so you don’t need to worry about her. I’m here for you, Y/N, and only you.”

There’s a minute as the evening sun dips over the horizon where you soak in his words. While Taehyung is far from being the brightest crayon in the box, you can feel his sincerity and eventually, you nod. “Thank you for telling me this, Taehyung. I know it must’ve been difficult to bring up the past. I appreciate it and I want us to move on from this to get to know each other better.”

“Yes.” He grins. “That’s what I want too.”

At the end of the night, you both end up walking by the poolside together, hand-in-hand, admiring the beautiful city’s view.

But the peace doesn’t last long. Why would it in a house full of testosterone and when this is a reality television show meant to sate drama-thirty folks at home? You should’ve known.

“No one is as dedicated to this relationship as I am.” Min Yoongi puffs out his chest, snickers leaving his lips. “I’m gonna prove it.”

The guy ends up taking a train of cameramen and one of the producers to a tattoo shop. They exchange looks but none of them persuade him otherwise, for the sake of the show’s entertainment. And the guy simply lies down on the table, revealing his slim bicep to the artist.

“Oh. my. god.” You stumble backwards as he peels off the white bandage, having just entered the door and was asked by you where he’s been. The man reveals his still reddened skin but the black ink now entrenched into his flesh. ��Yoongi!”

Taehyung appears from behind the pillar, jaw dropped to the ground. “Is that real?”

Yoongi grins a gummy smile, obviously proud of what he’s done. “Of course it is.”

Because right on his arm, is a giant ink picture of your face smiling and your name written in cursive underneath. A tattoo. Real. Permanent. Tattoo. Of your face. And your name.

Namjoon holds his palms up in defeat like he’s surrendering. “Dude got balls, all I’m gonna say.”

Seokjin sighs, dragging a hand over his face. “Why does it feel like I’m the only normal one around here?”

Before you can even address the issue of the tattoo and his horrible logic, there’s yet another issue.

“I’m really going to fight you!” Namjoon bumps his chest against Yoongi’s and the latter releases an icy chuckle.

“You wouldn’t be able to handle this.” His eyebrow cocks. “Not when your only exercise is fucking around.”

“Stop talking shit about and fight me.” And the two of them do just that.

Punches are thrown left and right, kicks and takedowns, bodyslams and chokeholds. They hurl each other left and right, fists aimed at cheekbones and groins. The others gather, Jungkook and Hoseok watching from afar, Jimin trying to intervene with Taehyung and Seokjin completely horrified over the display.

You find yourself by the banister and you wonder if anyone’s even here for you.

You’re sobbing and crying, throwing a lamp across the room that silences every man. “Do you even care about me?”

They stop, in the midst of grabbing the other’s shirt. The guys all turn and you run away with a hand cupping your mouth before embarrassment about the situation can devour you whole.

Park Jimin steals the limelight during the interview, holding his fedora to his chest. “Tensions are rising and it’s becoming unbearable. I just think he’s not here for the right reasons. And if it were me, I would never hurt Y/N like that. I only need a chance to prove it.”

Eventually, Jimin is the one to find you outside weeping and without saying much, he sits beside you and pulls you close, cradling your head and patting your back. You find comfort in his arms, able to calm down and you express your gratitude to his compassion.

Namjoon and Yoongi temporarily make amends for your sake and they both individually apologize. You forgive them, trying to put it behind you and focus on what’s actually important.

But the drama has yet to begin.

“So I had a business call early in the morning. Of course, business at Pink Panties is doing well. We’re able to keep cheap prices while paying our labourers well. Anyways, I really tried to keep my job seperate from the show since I’m here for Y/N but it was a really important emergency.” Hoseok is seated in his chair, one leg thrown over the other and he’s telling the story leisurely like he has all the time in the world. “So, I was trying to find an empty space as to not disturb the others and when I go down the hall and open up the bedroom...you wouldn’t believe what I find.”

“Is it true?” You whip your head away, drying your eyes with a tissue and Namjoon is at a loss of words. You sniffle, shoulders and frame quivering with your sobs. It doesn’t stop no matter how hard you try. And the camera focuses directly on you in a close up shot.

“Baby girl, baby girl. Don’t cry. I...baby girl, there’s only you, I promise.” He holds your hand within his. “We were just hanging out, that’s all. There’s only you in my life. I care about you, Y/N, and only you.”

You get yourself back together, holding up the pieces of your heart with makeshift glue and you gaze right into his eyes. “Namjoon, I want you to be honest with me. We can’t have a relationship, I can’t fall in love with you, if you aren’t honest. I want to trust you. So please, tell me what happened.”

The individual you’re facing is hesitant and you’re sure he’ll find some way to evade. It’s not like you want to hear it aloud anyways. You already know exactly what went on and the anarchy that was happening behind the scenes.

Namjoon slept with the producer.

As if life couldn’t get worse, the next day you wake up, there’s an atrocious cold sore right next to your lip, your throat is sore, you have a throbbing headache and a high fever.

It lasts for four days and on the fifth, the show’s remaining producers decides collectively to bring you to the doctor. What they tell you is equally petrifying to your symptoms- “It’s mono.”

Taehyung tips his head to the side, his lips pouty and eyes far-away in thought. “What’s mono?”

In another interview, Hoseok sighs. “Well, clearly, we know who got it first. Isn’t it obvious?”

“Hoseok said that? Fuck.” Namjoon laughs without mirth reaching his other features. “At least it wasn’t herpes.”

Seokjin exhales the longest breath, his temples already thumping with the added stress of his competitors. “Does this mean we all need to get checked?”

One thing’s for sure, you won’t be locking lips with anyone any time soon.

Yet, out of all the awful things that happen one after another, there are silver linings that occur in between. It’s just...they don’t involve you in any way, shape or form.

“You’re honestly a great guy.” Seokjin muses whilst the two of them are on the terrace together, enjoying some nice drinks, winding down from the eventful day.

“Thanks, bro.” Jimin smiles shyly, his eyes crinkling into half-moons. “To be fair, you’re pretty great yourself.”

There’s a moment taken and Jin sits back in his chair. His face is in a dreamy state, a sigh leaving his smiling lips. “I never thought I would meet such a great friend here. Jimin was an interesting character at first but I’ve gotten to know him and underneath it all, he’s actually a really sweet person.”

Hoseok shakes his head in another interview. “Those two are always going off on their own together and I don’t think they’re here for the right reasons. I’m here for Y/N and I’m not here to make friends. No one in the house knows what they’re doing.”

Jimin sheepishly grins and he shrugs, fussing with his fedora out of nervousness. “Jin and I have a lot in common and I like him a lot. I never thought I’d come on here to find someone so compatible.”

It’s a shit storm. At this rate, you’ll never be able to find love.

But the show must go on. It’s literally in your contract.

The moon is set high in the sky, the mansion quiet like it’s never been before. The lights are dim, candles flickering and lining the walls. All the men come in one by one in single file, gathering inside the room. The tension is high. You didn’t want it to be like this.

“Men.” The show’s host begins, breaking the solemn air. “There’s only six roses this evening. After all of this, one of you will be heading home. I wish you all the best.”

You appear and each of them smile at you, Jungkook chewing on some raw onions and Yoongi smirking at you, his tattoo showing in the flame’s luminescence. Every person has their own set of charms and personalities - you never thought making one decision could be so difficult. “This week has been very difficult for all of us. But for me, this experience is about finding a future and even the hard parts need to happen.”

A rose is held between your fingers and you take a gander around the room, soaking in all their features and all the nervousness found in their eyes. “Namjoon, will you accept this rose?”

He approaches in light strides, a grin plastered across his face. “‘Course I will, babygirl.”

Another one is brought to your hand. “Jimin, will you accept this rose?”

“It would be my absolute honour, milady.” He does an excessive bow in front of you, tipping his black fedora as if you were a princess.

As all the roses are given out and Hoseok’s hands are empty, you walk up to him, throwing your arms over his neck. The man embraces you and you hold back a sob. “I always thought you cared more about your career than me. I’m sorry, Hoseok.”

One ceremony after another. Hundreds of roses given out, red scarlet petals fluttering to the tiled floors. “Yoongi, I hope you can find a good tattoo removal place.”

“I thought we had a connection Y/N.”

“If this is the kind of person you’re looking for, then maybe you shouldn’t be here.”

“My future husband is in this room and it isn’t you.”

“I’m sorry.”

Days and weeks, date after date, kiss after kiss, and rose after rose. At the end, there can only be one.

“So-” The host settles down on the couch, ready to see what juicy details are rushing around in your brain. “-what are you thinking at this very moment, Y/N?”

You’re at a loss for words. “I honestly don’t know. I’m put in a very difficult position, Chris. On one hand, Jin is all I’ve ever dreamed about. He’s sweet and kind. He puts me at ease and I can imagine living a life with him. But then there’s Jimin and he’s sincerely the biggest gentleman I have ever encountered. He stands up for what he believes in, he and I share a lot of beliefs and I love that. There’s a connection there that I can’t refuse.”

The host adores every single word that spills from your lips, especially since it would put the audience in suspense for your choice. “So?”

You’re ready to rip out your hair. “I’m in love with two people!”

It’s the most shocking moment in Bachelorette history.

The entire nation is divided in half, hashtags trending on twitter and people screaming on instagram. But as they watch the scene unravel, you’re put even more crazed.

The breeze twirls into the strands of your hair. The sand is beneath your feet and the waves crash against against the shore, spraying a mist into the air. The candles are lit, glowing with the evening sun that dips on the horizon, reflected in the blue waters. It’s the perfect proposal.

“Y/N, from the first day I met you, I have been stunned. From the very beginning, I could be comfortable with you. I could be myself. You challenge me to be the best version of myself. You made me believe in love again and you are the one who gave me hope again. You are everything that I have dreamed for and more. There’s no one better that I would want to share my future and the rest of my life with. I love you so much. I love you, YN.” He gets down on one knee. “Will you marry me?”

You throw your arms around him. “Of course I will, Ji-”

The screen cuts to black and rose petals sprinkle from the sky.

The Bachelorette - even if it started all over again, you would always choose him.

[bluemoondust]

i just found your blog and i love all of the yandere pokemon stuff, can you please do some yandere eusine headcanons like i believe he's almost as bad as pepe le pew when it comes his darling like it almost makes him forget about suicune for a little bit

I'm glad you enjoyed my yan pokemon stuff! Eusine is one of those characters that, for some reason, stuck to me when playing through HG, so I got really excited to write these. A lot of the stuff he says in pursuit of Suicune gives enough yandere material 👀

✧General Yandere Headcanons — Mystery Man Eusine✧

Warning(s): Obsessive Behavior, Delusional Thoughts/Behavior, Stalking, Mentions of Non Consensual Touching, Breaking and Entering, Use of Hypnosis, Manipulation

The whole ordeal begins with curiosity. You caught this man's attention when he saw how Suicune would appear whenever you were around. He believed the beast of the north winds had chosen you and admittedly, Eusine could see why. You seem to have this aura around you that intrigued him. Every time he encountered you in pursuit of Suicune, he say you and decided to pick up on more details on you as a person.

Sooner or later, it gets unhealthy. To an extreme. Eusine, to put it bluntly, is a very obsessive yandere. He has been trying to track down Suicune for ten full years, so it's very telling right off the bat what sort of yandere he is. The small interactions eventually are not enough for him as he becomes sidetracked by you. This is to the point where, as you've said, Suicune is less of a priority now. You're what's on his mind. You keep him up late at night as Eusine makes up these little scenarios in his head about you. You are the reason he keeps popping up every now and then just so he can talk to you. Meanwhile, you are completely unaware of the fact that he was already following you beforehand.

It turns into a necessity to know every little detail about you, so Eusine can be closer to you. When he's not striking up a conversation with you, he is tracking your every move, wherever you go. He deems it an obligation to have every bit of information on you, whether it be mundane or worthwhile. Everything that has to do with you is something he holds dear to him.

Eusine is not fully aware of his yandere tendencies. He views it as a very deep passion and is the type to put ideas in his own mind. Though, in the context if he were conscious of all this, he pushes the red flags aside; without a care in the world. Whatever the case, Eusine is ever still calculating and charming. With every moment he spends time with you, it fuels the idea in his head that the two of you are together. He is the type of yandere who makes you feel comfortable, unless you can see past everything and catch onto the red flags. If that is so, Eusine views your avoidance as a silent treatment. He must have done something to upset you, but what? Either way, he'll come to your side and try to make things right as rain. Eusine can read you after all with how much he watches you.

But oh, I haven't even gone onto the topic of his... Little visits. Eusine has taken upon himself to pass by your home every once in a while to pick up trinkets. It can range from anything you own such as articles of clothing or accessories. It's just so he can has a piece of you with him wherever he goes. He does still has his research to do and he gets lonely. Eventually he can just make a copy of your key so he doesn't have to go through the window. You... Just haven't brought up the subject of such yet. You're probably hesitant to bring it up but don't worry, Eusine is way ahead of you.

He throws small acts of affection here and there, depending on how you are. He always gives the back of your hand a kiss whenever he conveniently runs into you. Compliments all around too. The man practically worships you to a high extent and can't go without a moment where he doesn't remind you how wonderful you are. He is always touching you in some way. A hand on your shoulder, petting your head, poking your cheek or nose, grasping your hand, a finger against your lips, and so on. It becomes... Overbearing, suffocating even. Eusine just loves the feel of you upon his skin; it's an addiction, really.

Why would this man be jealous of anyone? You're already his after all. The two of you are destined to be together, so why worry about anyone getting in the way? To him, those people are arrogant to even attempt such an act. If someone were to try and 'steal you away', the solution is simple: hypnosis. They will forget why they even tried or just come to an 'understanding' that you are with Eusine.... And they will completely support it. How nice of them!

I don't think Eusine is a selfish yandere, however I believe he has these little moments where he wants more from you. He's been good to you, so why don't you return the favor, darling? Even in his delusional state, Eusine is very aware that this whole thing shouldn't just be all give on his side while you just take, despite the fact that you aren't aware of such. So, it's only fair if Eusine steals kisses from you every now and then, right? He can freely ask for your presence any time, yes? If you refuse, that's disappointingly. Eusine thought you knew better, but that's fine. He has his ways in negotiating with you.

[adelior]

Name: Unconditionally

Author: R. Adelio

Genre: Romance, Minecraft, Comedy, Fluff

Main Lead: Technoblade, Dreamwastaken

Female Lead: Reader

Chapter: 1

Special Addition: Tchnomaid

Letters: 10,718

<- ->

"I'm bored" You mumbled into your palm as you kept your gaze on the papers that were set up in front of you. "It's your fault for trespassing their area, [Name]. You should know by now how strict Dream is with the boundaries of the countries." Wilbur interpreted, his brows furrowing by the second. "They could have killed you."

"I'm sorry, I was just curious" Hearing you apologize, he softened up and groaned. Wil patted your shoulder with a somewhat forced smile before leaving the room. "Make sure to finish brewing the potions by the end of the day. For now," He looked back, nodding his head. "I'll see you around, [Name]."

"You too, Wil" Sighing, you turned to look at the blonde-haired boy who stood awkwardly in the corner. "Well uh, that went well at least!" Slamming your first, you startled Tommy as he shrieked. "I got in trouble in YOUR PLACE-"

"Yeahhhh, about that, I'm sorry!" Tommy shook you by the shoulders, a grin spreading across his face. "I'll make it up to you okay? I'll set you up on a date with Wilbur if it makes you feel any better" Your cheeks darkened, giving the kid a pathetic slap as you covered the bottom half of your face.

"It's really nothing like that. I don't.. like him.." The last part of your sentence was muttered, and as usual, the boy who knew of your feelings let out a hollering laugh. "I knew it! Who would have fucking thought that you'd fall for Wil! Out of all people!"

"LOOK-" You turned to face him, your face getting hotter and hotter the more you thought about it. "I have my reasons okay! He's a good guy, and on top of that, he's an amazing friend"

"An amazing friend you say? He's also one hell of a fucking leader that's for sure. But enough about your crush let's go out and play with Tubbo!" Dismissing him with a single wave, you gave your best sympathetic smile. "Sorry Tommy, but I have to finish brewing these potions by the end of the day. I can't afford to be disciplined by Wil again"

"Hm, whatever, fine" The boy shrugged, leaving you alone. "THIS ISN'T THE END WOMAN! You will join me and Tubbo on our conquest sooner or later!" You chuckled, smiling at his childish behavior. "Yeah, yeah, now go on and have fun"

You can hear him shout out loud, laughing as he tackled what you perceive to be Tubbo. "I never wanna leave" The sentence that slipped out of your mouth caught you off guard. Despite being an outsider to their nation, they treated you with respect and saw you as a member of their group.

Sitting back down, you continued to flip through the pages of the book. Studying the recipes and applying the specific ingredients to each bottle. "Oh shit, I ran out of spider eyes" Cursing, you stood up to walk towards the door, looking out into the hallway. "Niki!" You shouted from your office, capturing the woman's attention. "Yes, [Name]?"

"Do you know if we have any spider eyes left in the chest room? Or have we completely run out of it" She pondered for a second, answering once she finished checking her inventory. "I don't think we have any more spider eyes. I'm also not carrying any with me sadly"

"Oh, that's alright. I can just outside and kill some spiders myself" Pushing yourself forward to one of your chests, you opened it and took some resources. A bow, 10 arrows, and full iron armor apart from your golden shoes. "[Name], you don't need to go out and kill some on your own. It's dangerous at night"

"Exactly, which is why I plan to go to the Piglin market to trade some gold for a few stacks of spider eyes" Niki shook her head in denial, refusing to let you pass by. "That's even more dangerous! We're humans, we can't go inside there unless we have the King's permission. And usually, we'd have knightly escorts to go around with us"

"True, but I can slip in and slip out without being noticed" You shrugged on your hood, a robe that covered your full body apart from your face. "I can hide with this, besides if they aren't able to tell that I'm human they'll never be able to report it to the king"

"Al..right.." The short-haired girl had a troubled expression on her face, but nevertheless, let you pass. "Good luck! Please come home safely" You turned to give her a single nod, a reassuring smile that was enough to calm her down. "I promise, so don't worry about me okay?"

And so you left, walking to the basement of your home where the Nether Portal stood tall. You gulped at the mere sight of it, how mysterious yet alluring. The purple particles only making it look majestic. "beautiful.." You muttered as you slowly entered, the change of temperature really hit you hard. It was hot, humid compared to how it felt in the overworld. "Goddamn how do piglins live like this"

"Shocking, right?" A male voice erupted from the silence, causing you to stiffen. "I'm assuming you're not used to traveling to the Nether." You slowly turned around, only to be met with a man with dirty blonde hair. "Pardon?" You tilted your head, staring at his smiling mask. "Nothing, would you like me to escort you and keep you safe?"

"And what makes you think I'd trust a stranger" You questioned, earning a chuckle from the man. "You're not as dumb as you look. But don't worry you're not my type, I won't do anything."

"WH-" His hand went over your mouth in a flash, he moves fast for a person with netherite armor, and on top of that a black robe. "Keep your voice down, first rule when entering the Nether World is to never bring unnecessary attention to yourself."

"Got it" Your voice was muffled from his large hand, he stepped back before leading the way, making sure that you were tailing right behind him. "The second rule, make sure to always be with somebody. Never travel alone or you'll die in an instant without somebody keeping you safe."

"Safe? Is the Nether really dangerous for you to say that?" Observing his reaction, you realized how sharp his jawline was. You can't peak through the mask but his mouth was fully exposed. "Yes, I take it you've never looked into this dimension?"

"Well, to be fair I've only heard of the Nether. This is my first time actually setting foot into the portal" The man's mouth pulled back into a dumbfounded snarl, almost as if he was silently judging you for your actions. "Weird." Was all he said before nudging you forward. "We're here, keep your guard up. What are you here for exactly?"

"I'm here to trade gold for a few stacks of spider eyes" He sighed, pulling your hood closer to your face. "You do realize you could have killed a few spiders in the overworld without having to come here."

"Uh, not really the best in combat you see" You admitted, darting your attention to the passing piglings who stood at least 5 feet taller than the man leading the way. Their species were large and brute compared to humans, they were cool but dangerous to interact with. "What the hell were you thinking when you decided to come here without somebody to guide you."

"I honestly have no clue" You stared at the man with a blank face, earning a disappointed grunt from him. "Well, turn around Princess because we just arrived at the Mob looting store. Stay out here, I'll get the eyes for you."

"Wait a second- I feel bad you're the one who led me here and protected me-" The man that accompanied you patted your head with one of the most genuine smiles you've ever seen. Despite him being awfully mysterious, he has shown nothing but kindness all throughout your journey. "Don't worry about it. Just stay here and don't run off anywhere. It's even more dangerous inside because piglins tend to fight over items."

Fidgeting with your hands, you finally agreed. The blonde took that as an agreement and stepped into the store. You were left to stay outside, leaning against the wall that was nearest to the door. A few seconds passed, and yet you were still outside waiting. You were beginning to think that the man who you walked with abandoned you.

"Ex..c.." A piglin with long pink hair muttered, his hand reaching for you. "Excu.." You stepped aside, worried that the mob was here to harm you. The more you stared at him the more you realized he was one of them, but one that looked more human. "Is there something you need?" You questioned the man, earning a nod. "What is it?"

"Do you.. Do-" Before he was able to finish his sentence, your eyes widened in realization. You swung your right hand to open your inventory, taking out a gold bar to hand over to him. 'I heard piglins liked gold, maybe he'll leave me alone if I gave him one' Was what you thought as you urged the hybrid to take it.

He looked at you back and forth, debating whether or not he should accept it. "Take it, it's alright I have plenty of where that came from" The man in front of you hesitantly took the gold into his hands, his eyes widening when he realized how shiny and well kept the item was.

"You..-"

"Hey." The man who accompanied you shouted once he exited the shop, pulling out his netherite sword. "Back off."

"Hey wait! He didn't do anything wrong, leave him be" You pushed the blonde male back slightly, apologizing to the other person with a forced smile. "Let's just head back before we get caught!" Turning around, you tangled your fingers with his and ran away, waving the piglin goodbye.

"What are you doing." He asked, narrowing his eyes from under the mask. "You said to keep attention away from us so I am-"

"I wasn't even that loud." You turned to glare at him. "It got a lot of people's attention" The man laughed, swooping you into his arms, and began to speed up his pace. "You're a good listener." He complimented, a smile fighting to break through his irritated expression.

It took time for the two of you to finally reach the same Nether portal from before. The blonde slowly lowered you onto your feet, handing the bag of spider eyes into your chest. "Here, it's heavy so make sure to hold it with both hands."

"Thank you.." You muttered, gladly taking the bag with a smile. "Say, um.. I never caught your name?" Before the man was able to walk away, he turned to look at you one last time before telling you his name. "Clay, the name's clay."

"Clay?"

"I'll see you around." With that, he pushed you into the portal. You fell onto your back once you were transported over to the overworld, lying there with staggering breaths. "I never got to tell him my name though" But once you sat up, the Nether Portal's liquid-like wall disappeared. The particles were being sucked into the middle, and the doorway to hell was disappearing.

"What the..-"

"[NAME!]" You hear your name being called out by what sounds to be Wilbur. Turning to look over your shoulder, you see the whole group running towards you with a worrying expression. "You're back!"

<- ->

ec: @quacobs (instagram)

[thefloorisbalaclava]

First of all, anon is 100% right about your writing. It kicks ass, I don't make the rules. It' still my inspiration to this day. Your writing always was amazing, it still is and always will be, continuously improving even when it seems almost impossible cause it's so good. Is there even a character you can't write? You always hit the nail on the head and it's mesmerising. And as much as I'm sorry to see you doubting such amazing content and knowing why this is a thing gives me violent urges, I'm so happy to see you enjoying writing again, as you should be 🫶

That being said, those words might have not been for me, not directly at least, but still hit me like a train. I'm more of an oc writer, I get most of my ideas in that regard and I can pour parts of myself into them to my heart's content. I barely post any complete writing with them, though, and I'm still far from finishing any full fanfiction  that features them. It's a hard pill to swallow, but what blocks me is the mostly non existat interaction. The Deus Ex fandom might be small, but it treated me well and welcomed my oc quite warmly. It gave me some confidence about my characters and my character creating skills, but it quickly shattered as I approached bigger titles as time passed. It looks like most people aren't interested in oc writing, unless you also do a lot of x reader writing and so you have a...pubblic? My self esteem is frail, to say the least, so there's no doubt that inspiration and motivation are affected by all this. My x reader content, when I manage to write some, goes pretty well considering my smaller blog and how I don't publish often. Yet, my requests have been dead silent since the DE fandom went rather dormant. I only have hold ones that I still didn't manage to finish, after ages. But requests would help me write more x reader content, cause I would have ideas to work on. So what does all this lead to? "Why do you even try? You're not good enough". And I'm starting to think that's the real reason why I struggle to write regurarly. It's so easy to be kind to others and remind them what anon said to you, because it's absolutely true, but being kind to my own self? Good luck with that. Those words are true, but not when it comes to me. So, honestly, I know this feeling too well, way to well. But I'll try to take your advice and not let this get to me too much, not anymore, because in the end, deep down, I know you're right.

I don't even know why I'm writing this long ass rant, but thank you for the reminder, and sorry for getting carried away like this. Hope I'm not making you uncomfortable or anything can't find the right word damn it

Don't ever apologize for feeling what you feel and needing to talk about it! I think this feeling is widespread among a lot of creators whether they are writers, artists or gifmakers. We can yell "I do this for me!" all we want, but at the end of the day we are human and humans crave interaction.

I get annoyed with myself when I start comparing my work to someone else's. "What are they doing to get so many notes that I'm not?" Honestly, only like the first few fics I wrote when I first came back to the cod fandom have really garnered and interaction now it's like meh. Some days I'm like whatever and other days it's like "okay so it's happening again. am I doing something wrong? Does my writing suck?"

Like I said, all these feelings are valid. It especially hurts when you've worked your ass off on something to only get the bare minimum of interaction then you see another fic that comes across your dash that has 500+ notes and the person just posted it an hour ago.

I feel like I should be used to it by now, you know. But for some reason it never gets easier. I do hope you know that I look forward to your writing (if that means anything) and I appreciate and love you 💙💙💙

[hardlyinteresting]

Matters of the mind, body, and soul

Laszlo Kreizler x reader

warnings: victorian ideals, discussions of sex (no smut), still 18+ to keep on the safe side, minors dni. the ending is open ended so feel free to imply what you like. potential spoilers for season 1 of the alienist. I also haven't edited this. if you know me, then no you don't please don't read this.

The pool house is eerily quiet as Laszlo makes his rounds reviewing the details of the crime scene. you follow silently keeping the bottom of your skirt lifted to avoid the possibility of blood stains. Lazlo follows invisible clues to one of the changing cubicles.

"what is it Laszlo?”

"l'm not sure yet" he mumbles.

you watch fascinated by the man in front of you.

"do you think something, or someone else stole his attention? He didn't complete his ritual on this poor boy" you offer.

"that's exactly what I am thinking” he says, reaching into the cubical with one hand running two fingers up the wall before bringing them to his lips. your breath catches in your throat you stomach turns in on itself and you can feel heat rush to your cheeks. Laszlo is kind enough to not mention the sound of your sharp intake of breath.

it's much later in the evening when you're back at the make shift office Sara set up.

Both Sara and John have gone home leaving Laszlo and yourself alone. you sit the counter pouring over notes you've made through out the case trying to focus your thoughts but the only thing on your mind is the image of Laszlo with his fingers to his lips. you're unsure why but it’s left you with a feeling of—is it longing? whatever it is it feels sinful. your mind wanders further imagining what the tips of his fingers might feel like against your own. at your waist? the curve of your hip?-caressing your thighs? between-- no you can't imagine that. you won't allow it.

"are you feeling alright?"

"hmm?"

"I was inquiring as to whether you might be feeling unwell. forgive me, but you haven't been yourself at all today”.

"no. I apologize l don't know what's gotten into me today doctor"

"you've seen something that’s left you un-nerved?"

"something lot that nature, yes.”

"do you wish to speak about it?”

you swallow hand brow furrows as you consider. if you can’t talk to an alienist about these thoughts who can you speak to? Laszlo puts down the piece of chalk from his hand, he sits down at the table pulling up another chair to face his. He motions to the seat. your heart races as you follow the silent instruction. your knees touch his when you sit and your quick to sit further back in the chair an action that does not go unnoticed by the doctor.

He also notes your unwillingness to look him in the eye instead choosing to focus on where your fingers trace patterns on your skirt

"your mind us wandering again?”

you only nod in response. biting your bottom lip. why do you feel like crying? you take another deep breath much shakier this time.

"it's not right--not proper"

"In my experience it's the thoughts we've been target to believe are improper that are actually the most natural.”

How is it possible that his understanding makes you want to cry more?

“I fear -- l am afraid that these thoughts are not as natural as you say they may be. I cannot imagine anyone having thoughts such as these about a person."

"so it is another person who has been occupying your mind?"

you nod.

"do you wish to cause this person harm? To injure or kill?"

"no! never." You’re quick to respond looking up at him.

He nods observing your wide eyes and damp eyelashes. He'd be lying if he said it didn’t make his heart clench seeing you so obviously distraught.

"well then" he says gently taking one of your hands in his, "l assure you, there is nothing unnatural about you or your mental preoccupations"

you shiver at the feeling of his fingertips against the pulse point of your wrist

"it may be bold of me, but I believe that what you’re feeling is simply desire"

you shake your head.

"l can't stop thinking about it"

"about what" He presses.

"this morning. you-- “ you sigh standing to turn away from the man," you licked your fingertips and my mind has not been my own since then."

"There is nothing shameful about desire. it is our most primal instinct the very reason every creature on this planet continues to exist"

He stands slowly and you can hear his footsteps approaching.

"if this is desire then my mother was not honest with me"

“It is likely she was not. But I doubt that the dishonesty was intentional”.

standing toe to toe with you he tilts your chin up for you to look at him with watery eyes.

"l still don't understand” you confess, "why would what you did cause this-- surely that's odd even if my thoughts themselves are not”,

“On the contrary. But it is not my place to speak to you about such things" his hand returns to yours.

"l must know Laszlo. I am tired of being at a disadvantage especially in matters of my own soul, mind and body."

He resists a smirk at the fire he sees grow behind your eyes. The unmoving need to stand your ground. an admirable quality.

"very well. There are many things that draw us to potential partner some attraction is conscious, but mostly attraction is a subconscious function, something we do not actively focus on in order to process. Some alienist believe that features that may seem insignificant to us are actually very important,” He lifts one of you hands to hips lips pressing a gentle kiss to your knuckles before continuing, “hands for example seem to be an important subconscious factor when women look at a man. Simply put; when I brought my fingers to my mouth this mourning--" he pauses to repeat the action and you can feel your bottom jaw go slack again, your thighs clench without thought. Laszlo continues, "it brought your subconscious processes to the surface. I trust you can understand why the lips and mouth might also play a role in desire".

"kissing." your mother had told you that much.

"among other things yes” He turns away returning to his chair.

"other things? Laszlo, please don’t give me half truths." you plead moving to sit in front of him again, this time not moving when your knees touch.

"it is not easy to explain.. And when it comes to matters of desire it is better you wait and experience them instead"

"wait? for what? To wed a man I do not care for, and who will not care for my desires? If all men knew what you say you know, then I know my mother would have told me more"

He considers it. your right. it's true that women are only told what it is they need to know to be "good wives" He is not obtuse to the fact that society has not been built for the comfort, satisfaction or pleasure of the female sex.

"Both the hands and mouth can be used to stimulate the body during relations"

you nod watching Laszlo's finger mindlessly trace circles on the arm of the wooden chair and you briefly consider that he's reimagining a moment from his past as he looks deep in thought.

“And, forgive me, have you done these things?”

He looks back up at you, “I have”

“Show me”. You surprise yourself by saying.

"you deserve to venture through these experiences with someone who loves you, and that you love."

Your brows furrowed as you think, then you're the perfect man. You drop to your knees in front of him taking both his hands in yours where they rest on his knees. "and do you not hold affection for me? John has told me you've said as much in so few words. I am not naive in believing you must know how I feel about you by now"

He offers a gentle smile, one hand leaving yours, moving to cup your cheek, "It is my propensity to the very affections you speak of that prevents me from acting. I have-- I have never been bold enough to assume that the feelings may be returned."

It's your turn to reach to hold his face in your hands,

“Oh, Laszlo”.

He stands slowly and you stand too. His weaker hand finds a place to rest on your hip, and despite the layers of skirts and petticoats you swear you can feel the warmth of his palm, the tender press of his fingertips. His other hand traces the the shape of your cheekbone, and jawline memorizing each detail. It's slow and almost imperceptible but at some point your eyes have fluttered shut and your can feel yourself leaning in as his lips meet yours. Oh. He pulls you closer, the hand on your hip moving to press you close by the small of you back.

His forehead rests against yours and you take a moment to appreciate the soft scratch of his beard against your palm.

“Is this equal to the images your mind conjured”.

“Yes,” you confess, “but there was more”.

“Tell me”.

You shake your head avoiding his gaze almost as embarrassed as you were earlier.

“There is no shame between lovers, mien Schatz”.

“Lovers?” The word catches in your throat as you return your attention to him once more.

“I thought that I was clear in my intentions--forgive me. I would never have--if this is not an interaction you which to have tell me at once, I will put the notion to rest”

“I want this-- I want you Laszlo”.

“Then it would be an act of cruelty on my part to not give you what you desire”.

His lips are on yours once again, but this time we walks you backwards until your back is against the wall, the grip of both his hands on your hips much more firm this time.

“I wish to know what it feels like-- “ you grab one of his hands in both of her own “--to feel your fingertips upon my own lips”

You maintain eye contact with the doctor as you bring his hand up, dropping your head down to meet his hand that is in your control, his fingertips graze your bottom lip, his fingers twitch but he does not pull away. You hesitate but venture to brush the tip of your tongue against his forefinger as he had done himself this morning. Pulling away only when he lets out a shaky breath.

“I think I understand,” you mumble, “and these things, they affect you too, doctor?”

“Very much so”.

[sonic7ischaos]

I wanna see more interactions between Shadow and Amy.

Not in a shipper kind of way, I don't really do shipping, with a few rare exceptions which are supported by canon or believable with some arguing using established character interaction (the ones that come to mind are Vector x Vanilla, and Shantae x Risky Boots).

But that's not it.

It was Amy's pleading in Sonic Adventure 2 that led to Shadow remembering his full promise to Maria, and deciding to sacrifice himself to save the world, and they never follow up on that.

I'd like to see Amy and Shadow stuck together with some downtime. Waiting on Rouge or Sonic (or both) to show up for mission. Amy tries making small talk, while Shadow is silent, clearly thinking about something.

"Ugh! What is taking them so LONG?! if I didn't know any better I'd think Rouge was being flirty with my Sonic! You'd think someone as fast as you two would know better than to keep a lady waiting."

"..."

"Ha, Sorry. I can be a little silly when it comes to him. HE'S JUST SO COOL!...aaand you don't wanna talk about Sonic. Umm, sorry...hehe..."

"..."

"...Sooo...ok, I know this is kind of a heavy question, but what was Maria like? If you don't wanna talk about it, that's ok, but she was important to you right? It's hard to imagine someone related to the doctor that wasn't twirling their moustache and laughing maniacally-"

"You know-"

"OH MY GOSH I AM SO SORRY I DON'T KNOW WHY I SAID ALL THAT, THAT WAS SO RUDE AND DISRESPECTFUL I DIDN'T MEAN ANYTHING BAD AND AND AND-!"

"-I never thanked you."

"AND AND AND...Huh?"

"You came to me, when the ARK was falling. You talked to me, pleaded with me to see reason, to have compassion. To give them a chance to be happy. You reminded me of what I was fighting for. I was so angry and confused, and it was you who helped pull me out of that darkness, reminded me of my friend who loved the world she never got to see."

"...she grew up on the Ark? She never saw the earth?"

"No, and it's still my greatest regret, but it's in the past...I think you would've been friends, she also liked to talk."

"Hehe, sorry. And I'm sorry she never got that."

"It's fine, and me as well She was more like the Doctor than you'd think. Completely stubborn and very capable, despite how she looked. I used to be confined to a small section of the facility, monitored and controlled every waking moment by scientists who saw me as nothing more than a research project. It was Maria who changed that. Twelve years old and she fought against the research staff about my confinement and treatment hard enough that I was freed."

Haha! Sounds cool!"

"She was. I think she saw herself in me. Trapped in a cage she would never leave, poked and prodded by doctors in lab coats and sterile rooms who saw her as little else but data on a clipboard. She was sick you see, the impetus for creating Project Shadow was to create an organism incapable of getting sick or aging, and studying how its body fought off disease and applying that knowledge to her illness. Gerald only wanted to see his granddaughter well, to give her a good, long life..."

"...I'm sorry"

'It's okay. You and her have a lot in common, you're both passionate and stubborn, and you've got a strong sense of justice. I'm glad to see that she wasn't wrong about the people here. The earth IS worth fighting for."

"Aww, thanks."

"...They're here, they'll arrive by elevator in a few minutes."

"YES! FINALLY! We can get started! I'll show that Sonic to keep ME waiting!"

"..."

"...And Shadow? Thanks for telling me. Maria sounds cool, I wish I'd gotten to know her. And I want you to know, you don't have to keep your promise alone, whether you like it or not, we're friends, and we've got your back."

"Hmph. I think you've kept that faker waiting long enough. I think he'll be just as thrilled to see you you are to see him. Why don't you go meet him there, and send Rouge up, the sooner we get them debriefed on Eggman's scheme the better"

"YES! THANK YOU!" Amy rushes out the door to the elevator, her voice heard echoing in the hall outside. "SOOOONIIIIIC!!! I'VE BEEN WAITING FOR YOU MY DAAAARLING!!! I CAant wait to show you what I've found! you'll be so impressed and you'll want to marry me and and and-"

Aaaand, scene. I dunno, I just think that in having Shadow become Vegeta, hedgehog edition , you miss out on seeing any follow through on emotional story beats. In the last story in SA2, for a moment, Amy BECOMES Maria for Shadow for a moment. She stands for everything Maria stood for, and we don't see her become anything more than a background detail for Shadow. Not in a romantic sense, but you'd think they'd interact more for how meaningful that scene is for Shadow.

With Ian Flynn writing Frontiers, I hope we can start getting stuff like this in the games again.

[talkwithstraykids]

Changkyun frowns as he looks around, taking notice of the way a lot of the soldiers seem to huff at him in spite. "I'm so sorry..." He mumbles quietly. I look around the room, still taking in how extravagant things were while I begin to unpack silently. When he questions how quiet I was, I can only sigh as I look over my shoulder to face him. "Channie, nothing good has happened since you rescued me. The war.... your kingdom destroyed... y-your father..." -🌻

"Easy now pretty boy." Chungha softly says as she carefully works her way into another room, since she wasn't going to sleep with the men for everyone's comfort and eases herself into the bed. "This war is not your fault and honestly neither side is right or completely innocent, there is a lot of pain and pointless death, but that doesn't mean it's your fault. You were just being loyal and following orders for what you were told was best for all. You had good intentions no matter the outcome and thats important too."

Chan sighs softly and gently cups your cheeks in his hands, "Are you blaming yourself baby? Don't do that....none of this is your fault okay?.....Your brother made the decision to start the war back up and to attack is. Not you. He would have done this whether you were with us or not, you know that. But at least now you're here with us to help us and be a part of our family and our people. And I think you've done more to help fight against the war than your brother has to start it up again....I mean my people seeing you as my mate and how you treat us and interact with everyone.... it's changing so many mind love. To see that not all humans hate and want to kill us. That there are good ones too who we could get along with and have as allies and friends and even family."