#where's the full. halp meh.

[everyarjuna]

[mais-nerdy-corner]

Շเ๓є Շ๏ ש๏Շє!

Once again, my draft is full of ideas and I need help on what to finish writing next. Leave your votes and thoughts in the comments!

1. ❝���๓ค๓๏гเ❞ | ๒єภภєՇՇ א гєค๔єг

Synopsis: An omamori is often given to another person as an amulet of protection or physical form of well-wishing. What would happen if the unfortunately extremely unlucky young adventurer from Mondstadt is given an omamori by a young shrine maiden from Inazuma?

2. ❝Ꭾคเภ кเɭɭєг❞ | אเค๏ א гєค๔єг

Synopsis: Xiao once saved you from falling to your death, now it's your turn to save him from succumbing to his karmic debt.

3. ❝Gɭค๔เ๏ɭยร❞ | к๏к๏๓เ א гєค๔єг

Synopsis: The flower that symbolises strength, victory and pride was securely held in her hands as she stood there in front of your grave. Once known as a childhood friend, the closest confidant and a fellow comrade of the Divine Priestess of Watatsumi Island, she retold the tales where one mistake eventually led you to your death.

4. ❝Շђє ร๓เɭเภﻮ ค๔єקՇยร❞ | չђ๏ภﻮɭเ א ค๔єקՇยร! гєค๔єг

Synopsis: No matter what hardships they have gone through, one Morax's earliest followers can always be seen smiling at all times. Nobody knew what was the reasoning behind their behavior, some say that's just how they are, others might think you're unstable. But for you, it was the last request of someone you consider as your own parent.

5. ❝ɭ๏ภﻮ Ŧ๏гﻮ๏ՇՇєภ❞ | ợเợเ א รเ๒ɭเภﻮ! гєค๔єг

Synopsis: Having a Cryo Vision just to freeze time, you're doing this for only one reason. Still waiting for your little sister Qiqi's return from her herb picking, you decided to venture out to the outside world in search for her. But once you found her, you've been long forgotten.

6. ❝ɭเՇՇɭє Ŧคє❞ | รςคгค๓๏ยςђє א гєค๔єг

Synopsis: Scaramouche's mission in Sumeru caused him to be seriously injured. He was already sure that he would die, until you found him and saved his life.

7. ❝Շђє 11Շђ ђคг๒เภﻮєг'ร Ŧค๓เɭץ❞ | ՇคгՇคﻮɭเค א гєค๔єг

Synopsis: Ajax has always wanted to have a family of his own, but he often hesitate given his status as a Fatui Harbinger. But he'll do everything in his power to protect you and his future child.

Your votes and thoughts are much appreciated! Plz halp meh :')

[msbluebell]

One of my favorite scenes from the Blue Lions route is during the fight with Randolph. Up until that point, Dimitri has given Byleth the cold shoulder, but when you take out Randolph's forces and he says 'a total loss', I love how we get to hear Dimitri call Byleth 'professor' again, especially with such urgency, which shows that despite his sharp words, deep down, he still cares. I just feel that this scene, as small as it is, deserves more recognition.

I think, deep down, Dimitri never did stop caring about Byleth.

Dimitri’s psychology during the Blue Lion Route is fascinating to say the least. I probably could 100% write a term paper on it.There’s a lot to unpack there, and a lot to explore. I’ve actually talked to a friend who is a professional counselor about his psychology several times and we never run out of new things to discuss and break down.

I think the most fascinating and complex state of Dimitri’s psychology is when he’s feral.

It’s important to understand the “how” and “why” whenever we’re discussing something like this. “How” and “why” Dimitri became feral is just as important as “how” and “why” he decided to later atone, and it’s massively important for understanding Dimitri’s actions and how the things that happen to him tie to character development.

Dedue says it best, I think, Dimitri isn’t a person who doesn’t care about others, in fact, he cares too much.  

That’s the heart of the issue right there. Dimitri, no matter how abrasive, dismissive, or aggressive he acts, still cares deeply. He never once STOPPED caring, and if you play close enough attention and pick up on small details you can spot the signs that he’s hiding it behind a mask of indifference because of his self-loathing and madness.

Or maybe he doesn’t even realize he still cares.

I find it utterly fascinating. 

If you break down Dimitri’s whole mentality while he’s feral, you kind find a surprisingly organized and moral (kinda, as moral as you can be while being...that) philosophy. Say what you will, but at the bare bones, Dimitri keeps to his ideals. For a man who considers himself nothing more than just a beast, he take special care of who his targets are. 

He specifically only targets people he actively considers a threat. Thieves and bandits, who he explains are rats preying on the weak and defenseless, Imperial soldiers who are on the enemy side and have been hunting him for years, commanders of armies. He doesn’t target villagers, or anyone in the Church (one priest is even amazed that Dimitri, while feral, patted an orphan child on the head, showing clear signs of humanity). Maybe he would if they agitated him enough. Dimitri isn’t healthy at all. He’s suffering from severe after effects of isolation, delusions, self-imposed brainwashing, stress, etc. He’s a danger to himself and others, and poking him too much. But, at his core, despite all the madness and how far he’s fallen, Dimitri somehow keeps the heart of his ideals of justice and protecting the innocent. Oh, it’s twisted beyond belief, and it’s gone ugly, but it’s still there. It’s just buried under a looooooooooot of...that...

The point is, at his heart, Dimitri still cares. That’s exactly what got him into that state in the first place. His Survivor's Guilt was so strong that he manifested auditory and visual hallucinations over it. His whole reason for wanting to kill Edelgard is so that the dead can finally rest. Heck, we see him actively begging his hallucinations to wait a little longer for him to hunt her. He cares too much and it’s actively destroyed him.

The thing is, those same hallucinations of loved ones are the driving force behind his mental state when he’s feral. We see that they’ve actively been mocking him, heck, we hear him beg them not to look at him with scorn.

Now, we know that these are projections of Dimitri’s own mind, but as far as he’s concerned these are the real opinions and demands of those who have died while he survived. He’s basically emotionally abusing and brainwashing himself so much that he not only believes that he has not other purpose than seeking revenge on the dead’s behalf (this also isn’t helped by his lack of ability to defend himself. With Felix, for example, and I DO love Felix and think he’s right to be scared, but calling Dimitri a boar may have unintentionally reinforced the idea in his head for years even before the brainwashing. Felix, I know that was your way of trying to keep Dimitri from going too far, but bad move bro), but that he ultimately isn’t deserving of the life he’s living either. He’s so damaged at this point, by what’s basically self inflicted harm, that he can barely recognize anything else as mattering.

I’ve seen people who have said that they wanted to beat some sense into Dimitri. Fight the madness out of him, so to speak. I don’t blame them, Dimitri did some disgusting things during the Blue Lion Route. But fighting him wouldn’t have helped, arguing wouldn’t have helped. The problem isn’t that Dimitri doesn’t think he’s wrong, or doesn’t see that he’s a monster. He’s aware of that, completely. What Dimitri needed was to been shown that his life was worth more than being a pawn for revenge, the opposite of having the shit beat out of him, or being yelled at. Negative reinforcement wouldn’t have worked here. Hell, it would probably have only made the situation worse, and reinforced his own brainwashing that he is undeserving of life. I think that’s why Byleth in the game never beat him over the head, or yelled at him, they realized that. 

Dimitri loves too much, and you can’t beat love with hate. He has to be loved out of his state. He has to be shown that his life is worth something, both to other people, and to himself. That’s why Rodrigue’s sacrifice was so important to his development.

(God, there’s so much to say that I’m jumping all over the place, someone Halp Meh)

And, another, just as important, thing. 

I think he’s silently resentful of Byleth and the others for not being there for him when he needed the support the most.

When he sees Byleth again for the first time in five years, when he thinks they’re a ghost, he doesn’t sound as angry and grim at first. He just sounds tired. Tired, and sad, and full of regret. With Byleth dead, he knows he failed them, that they died while he lived. He just accepts their presence in his life as a ghost, acknowledging that they were here to haunt him.

But then it turns out Byleth was alive, and all that sadness and regret and mourning was for nothing. That they were alive the whole time. And, frankly, Byleth’s reasons for WHY they weren’t around kinda DOES sound like bullshit. “I was asleep” isn’t a very good answer in any other route either, heck, in Edelgard’s routes she thinks it’s an unfunny joke. But for Dimitri it seems to piss him off. He probably DOES believe Byleth, maybe, but it’s not an answer he’s happy with. Heck, he’s not happy with anyone after that.

One of the moments where he sounds like his old self, where he looses that anger in his voice, is when Dedue shows up and explains he was too injured to find Dimitri, which is a much more valid excuse and one that Dimitri seems to readily accept. He’s much warmer with Dedue than even Byleth’s return, and I 100% believe that part of the reason was because of Dedue’s not bullshit excuse.

So, yeah, I should actually focus on the ask now. Yes, that scene is great, fantastic even. There’s a bunch of just...tiny moments like that which show the real humanity beneath Dimitri’s thick layer of madness and...feral-ness? I love it. It’s one of the many moments that really make him feel multilayered. And tiny moments like that got me through the four months he was Feral for my Blue Lions playthrough.

Little moments like that are like taking your first gulp of air after being underwater for too long.