#whenever people show support for my longer fics

[koqabear]

Watching yeonjun’s solo teaser reminded me of killer instinct for some reason and I still think about that fic every day 😭😭 waiting for the day you write something else for it possibly! <3 I know you said you’d make one in beomgyu’s pov one day and I am sat for whenever that happens. I will literally read it from anyone’s point of view I loved that au so much thank you

OMG no you're so right. it's so funny bc yeonjun literally has a story of his own that was never revealed bc i just. didn't wanna make the story more complicated than it already was LMFAO

i know that i'll get to those killer instinct requests eventually. that story is srsly one of my favorites bc you really can just expand the universe in all these different ways... i'm so happy to know that there are people that like this fic as much as i do !!!!! thank you !!!

[hannieehaee]

OUTTA MY MIND (teaser)

18+ / mdi

summary: getting a brand new job as a senior idol's manager was scary enough on its own, but it became even worse when said idol was jeon jungkook, idol of all idols. what made it even worse? when jungkook began taking a special liking to you, damning any conflict of interest his crush on you may have had.

content: idol!au, staff!reader x idol!jungkook, jungkook is shameless about his crush on reader, but it's fine bc reader likes him back!!, reader acts hard to get bc her job is too important though boo, afab reader, banter, jk is a flirt, reader is a little bit shy, a lot of rlly wrong info about working in the industry, smut, oral (f receiving), penetrative sex, etc.

(^ no actual content warnings in the teaser)

wc: 924 (teaser); 7.7k (full fic)

release date: may 31st

or you can check it out on my ko-fi or patreon today by subscribing to either one!

a/n: ive had this in the drafts for a while but kept forgetting to finish it lol anyways i hope u guys enjoy it once it comes out<3 (also not 100% proofread oops..)

masterlist | kofi/patreon

support me through a one time tip<3

Whenever you'd tell someone you worked within the entertainment industry, – the music industry, to be precise – people always showed a little extra interest in your words, probably assuming you to be involved in the flashier aspects of it. The statement on it's own sounded exciting, enigmatic even. This would only then be followed by disappointed upon finding out your specific profession of choice, deeming it less exciting than most.

You were a manager. No, you were not an active member of the entertainment industry itself, but you were one of the many pillars necessary for the talent to create the entertainment people would always seek.

Being as young as you were, it had been hard to get to where you were so quickly. Networking had been your best friend all throughout your career, eventually landing you in your current role – one that would only open even more doors for you.

It had only been a week since you had received a call from your friend – an old friend from an internship who just so happened to be a former Hybe video producer – letting you know of a recent opening as one of the many managers at the company. Having been between gigs at the time, you jumped at the chance without a second thought. Hybe? The biggest entertainment company in Korea? You didn't need any details before agreeing.

It was a few days later in which you found out the details. The opportunity had been even more life-altering than you'd thought.

Originally, you had believed you'd end up becoming manager to one of the many brand new rookie groups in the growing company. With so many surging youth in the industry, it made sense to you that you'd be assigned such a role, not having had any prior experience within Hybe itself.

Except that wasn't the case. Having previously worked and interned at a few other South Korean entertainment companies through the years, it seemed like Hybe deemed you experienced enough to assign you the role of becoming a senior artist's manager.

Jeon Jungkook.

Senior artist had been an understatement. Those had been the words written in your contract, explaining your role in excruciating detail, yet failing to mention that your client would be Korea's most popular singer.

You couldn't lie, you were insanely intimidated by your new role. Despite being proudly skilled at your job, becoming the manager of an idol who had been in the game for longer than you'd even been out of college was a bit scary. Jungkook had gone from the absolute bottom to the top, he had most likely lived through it all by now – what kind of expertise could you offer someone who had already seen it all?

Being manager of an idol differed slightly from managing any other person. Idol companies usually handled the schedulings, bookings, and the legalities of their artists. As a manager, you somewhat took the role of a bodyguard. You were meant to show up everywhere Jungkook went and become his spokesperson – vying for him as if your life depended on it.

And now it was too late to back out – not that you actually wanted to. All paperwork had been signed, you had your own personal Hybe badge and all the benefits that came along with working at the company. Any feelings of intimidation or fear for the role would have to be put aside as you walked into the Hybe building to meet with your new client; the boy you'd have to stick by 24/7 from now on.

You weren't sure what you were expecting upon meeting him. It wasn't like there would be any special introduction, or even as if you were his sole manager; no, he actually had a few others who would occasionally aid him in the absence of his main manager, which was now you. Today was a workday for him, meaning that he likely already had a few people in supportive roles as he did whatever it was that Jeon Jungkook did while working.

Walking into the huge building, after getting lost a few times, you made your way to the seventh floor, which, as you'd been informed, had various rooms designated for photoshoots. That's where you'd find Jungkook for the first time, presumably having one of the many shoots scheduled for this week.

Having possession of his schedule made you realize how busy idol life was. Despite having no public schedules all this week, he had a packed itinerary, filled with either shoots or signings or producing sessions. You hadn't even met him yet, but you were already assured that he was overly hardworking – and you had maybe also stalked him online this past week.

It was very unlikely you'd even speak to him, seeing how busy he was. Your duty, after all, was just to be one of the many members of his team, taking care of any logistics as you went around with him, but not taking away from his time by socializing with him.

Upon entering the room, he was the first thing you noticed. Ignoring every other person working the room, your eyes focused specifically on him. It was hard not to, since he was quite literally standing under the spotlight, modeling for a camera. But it was more than that. He had an aura that filled up the room. Putting aside every stylist and photographer in the room, every staff member and intern, he was truly the epitome of main character.

Fuck. Was this going to cause trouble?

....

you can check it out today on my ko-fi or patreon by subscribing to either one!

[violentdelightsandviolentends]

Honey Girl. Chapter Five.

Chapter Four. Chapter Six. Series Masterlist. The Playlist.

Chapter Synopsis - Does absence make the heart grow fonder, or does it just make everything ten times more difficult?

Pairing - Dad'sBestFriend!Bucky Barnes x Female Reader - soulmate au

Warnings - smut. cursing. alcohol consumption. angst. mention of illness.

Age Rating - 18+

Word Count - 5.7k

Author's Note - it's here!! as always, I can't thank you enough for your love, support and patience with this fic. us writers lead busy lives, and i've been trying my hardest to find the time to write whenever I can, so it means so much that you guys stick with me - even when things take longer than expected. love you all. you're angels. please feel free to spam my inbox with thoughts and suggestions - it always makes my day when you're all so passionate. mwah.

as always, reblogs, comments and feedback (even anonymous feedback) are immensely appreciated!! your reblogs are the only way to circulate my fics, which keeps me going <3

Masterlist. Inbox.

The sand is warm beneath your feet, cooling breeze cascading across your skin. The waves caress the shore in repetitive motions, lulling you into calm.

Sunlight beaming down, you shield your eyes and look up, sighing in contentment at the shades of blue that paint the sky.

A shriek and a laugh come from somewhere on your right. You look over and see a couple and their toddler running after each other, sprinting down the beach and into the ocean. The little girl can't stop giggling, tripping over her own feet as she chases her parents. Something tugs at your heart, deep and visceral.

It's been three months since you left home.

It's been three months since you saw Bucky.

He calls every few days, trying to give you the space you need while also keeping in touch. You have to resist the urge to call him every ten minutes. It's an improvement, at least. It was five minutes when you first moved.

He texts you good morning and goodnight everyday without fail, just to let you know he's there. You can't sleep until you get his text. It's like a lullaby, reassuring and soothing. Like a chamomile tea, warming and calming you from the inside out.

You think about him the most at night time. Your days are spent running around preparing for the bakery. Testing, retesting, writing up recipes, measuring out quantities. You want it to be perfect.

The baking is taking your mind off Bucky, for the moment at least. You've thrown yourself into your new role, eager and excited. Stella's ecstatic to have you around. You love that you're still just as close as you were, despite the time apart. Friendships like that are rare.

Lacie calls you most nights. She demands to know what you did that day, who you spoke to, what you made. It's like therapy, sitting and decompressing together over videochat. She's a lifeline, whether she knows it or not.

And of course, the most supportive people in your life - your parents. Your Mom is desperate to come and visit, begging that you let her know when you're less busy so you can show her around. She loves the sunshine just as much as you. A woman after your own heart.

On the nights when the doubt creeps in, unwelcome and dark, you remind yourself how lucky you are. Surrounded by people who adore you, support you, love you unconditionally. And then the night doesn't seem so dark. The light pours through the cracks.

You walk home from the beach, warmed and carried by the knowledge of love.

✵  ✵    ·　 ✵ 　　 *  · ✵

"This is ridiculous."

Stella's perched on the edge of your countertop, blush pink macaron in her hand.

"Good ridiculous?"

She scoffs, looking at you incredulously.

"Where did your confidence go? You never doubted yourself in school. Yes, good ridiculous. It shouldn't work, but it does."

Shouldn't work, but it does. Seems to be the story of your life at the moment.

"I need these on the menu."

"You don't think they're a little... pretentious? My best seller is a chocolate chip cookie. A honey and rosewater macaron isn't exactly a childhood favourite."

"Babe. That's the beauty of this. You can put whatever the hell you want out in your bakery. So what if they're unconventional? They're delicious. That's all that matters."

"Okay. Fine."

You relent, thinking about her earlier question. Where did your confidence go? When you graduated culinary school, you never doubted your abilities. Your technique, your flavours, your presentation - you had full faith in all of it. Now, you seem to be second guessing yourself.

You know it's because of your Tethering.

Before, you understood how the world worked. Good, bad, in between. Love, lust, the very clear difference between the two. You watched as other people found their forever person, and acknowledged their new journey.

And then you found Bucky. Or, Bucky found you.

Suddenly, the world you'd lived in before no longer made sense. The people, the places, the relationships, all impacted by the way you feel about your soulmate. Everything, everyone, everywhere, reminds you of Bucky. You're experiencing emotions you've never felt before. It's disorientating, confusing, complex. Your understanding of the world has changed completely.

It takes time to adjust.

No one ever talks about the way your Tethering turns your life upside down.

For some, it's completely positive. They enjoy the uprooting, revel in the change.

For others, it's a huge adaptation. One filled with tears, and confusion, and doubts.

Both are valid. Both are understandable.

You remind yourself of this every day.

✵  ✵    ·　 ✵ 　　 *  · ✵

"There's someone in the café that wants to speak to you."

The youngest waitress, Isabel, stands in the kitchen doorway, looking at you hopefully. You set down your piping bag and wash your hands, talking to her over your shoulder.

"Who is it?"

"No idea. Some guy. He's kinda hot. Brown hair, tall, beard."

Your heart skips a beat, breath caught in your lungs. Bucky jokes sometimes about coming to see you, but would he just show up announced? Do you want him to?

You can't feel it in your chest, you realise suddenly. You can't feel the ease, the relief, the knowing. Maybe being apart for so long has weakened your connection. The thought makes you strangely emotional.

You inhale carefully and thank her, before making your way out. It's almost closing time, and there's no one around other than the man stood with his back to you.

He turns around, and you realise quickly that your hope was misplaced. You've never seen this person before. He is handsome, admittedly. But he's not your soulmate.

"Hi."

"Hey. Are you the baker here?"

"I am."

He holds out his hand for you to shake, stepping closer.

"I'm Rafael."

You tell him your name, and he smiles, nodding.

"Forgive me if this is weird, but I had to meet you. To thank you properly, in person."

You don't say anything, so he continues.

"Let me, uh, explain. Sorry, should have started with that. My sister is sick. She's going through treatment currently, and it's been super hard on her. She's had no appetite whatsoever, and she's losing weight rapidly."

He takes a deep breath before continuing.

"A couple of weeks ago, I picked up a load of stuff from this place because my Mom was coming to visit. My sister tried your earl grey and lavender cookie, and ate the entire thing. It was the first time I've seen her eat for weeks. So, I came back and bought basically all of them every day."

You laugh, coming to a realisation. You wondered why those cookies were selling so well all of a sudden.

"I just wanted to say thank you. It might not seem like a big deal, but it's really huge for us. I also wanted to explain why all of those cookies were suddenly going missing at like ten in the morning."

You gesture at him to sit, the both of you taking a seat at one of the tables nearby.

You talk for almost an hour, listening intently to Rafael as he tells you about his family. He moved to California to be with his sister Maria when she got sick, no one else around to care for her. He asks about yours, and you tell him about your parents and their constant encouragement. He's also interested in how you got into baking, so you tell him all about culinary school, and the dreams your Grandma gave you when you were a kid.

"You're really talented, you know."

"I bet you say that to all of the bakers around here. But thank you."

His fingers brush yours where they're resting on the table, making you shiver.

"I'll make Maria her own box, if you like. I'll leave them behind the counter, just tell Isabel who you are."

"You'd do that for her?"

"Of course," you smile. "The idea that I'm helping someone with my silly little creations makes me really happy. We can work out a schedule, and I'll make sure I bake Maria some extras when I do my usual batch."

"You're incredible. Seriously. Thank you."

He squeezes your hand and you squeeze back. The two of you are sat in the café as the sun sets, orange glow illuminating the room. You didn't expect to make a friend today. You're glad you have.

"Well, I should probably go and clean up the kitchen. You know where to find me, if you need anything. It was lovely to meet you, Rafael."

He rises when you do, smiling at you earnestly.

"You too. Nice to finally put a face to the cookie, so to speak."

You chuckle and show him out of the door, waving as he walks down the street. Suddenly, he turns around, striding back towards you.

"I'm so sorry if this is forward, and please feel free to say no, but... are you single? If you are, I'd love to ask you to dinner sometime."

The answer to that question is much more complicated than Rafael could ever imagine. So instead, you say,

"I'm not. I'm Tethered, actually."

His brows raise in surprise, but he's smiling.

"You are?"

"Yeah, I am. He doesn't live here, though. He lives back home, where my parents are."

"You guys are married?"

"No! Not yet. It's, uh... a complex... situation."

"Ah," he says, gentle, knowing look on his face. "I thought Tetherings weren't meant to be complex. Isn't that the whole point? That they're easy?"

You laugh, but it's not malicious. You're thinking about how sweetly naive he is, how he's got a huge storm coming his way one day.

"He's my Dad's best friend."

You're not sure why you're admitting this to a man you met an hour and a half ago, but you are. It's almost a relief, to get it off your chest again - to tell someone who's completely neutral, who doesn't know either of you.

"Woah."

"Yeah."

"That... is complicated."

"Yeah," you chuckle. "Understatement of the century."

Rafael leans against the wall, watching you intently. He's curious.

"How did your parents react?"

"They don't know yet."

His eyebrows raise almost comically high.

"Wait, what? How did you hide that? I thought it was supposed to be impossible to hide that you're Tethered. Although, I guess I had no idea, seeing as I asked you out."

"We wanted to figure it out for ourselves first, before telling anyone. And then I moved out here, so we're doing long distance. Like I said, complex."

"Understatement of the century," he laughs.

You look at each other for a moment, before he smiles.

"I'm sorry I asked you out. I wouldn't have, if I'd known."

"Please, don't apologise. I admire your... courage?" you grin. "And I appreciate you coming to see me today. I have like two friends here in Cali, so it's nice to feel like I've made another."

He smiles again, wider this time. Someone's going to be lucky to be Tethered to him one day, you think.

"I know it might surprise you, given my good looks and... courage," he chuckles, "but I don't have many friends out here either. I've been so focused on Maria, I haven't had time to socialise."

"The Universe works in funny ways, huh?"

"Sure does."

You wander back through the door, ready to close up for good this time.

"I'll see you tomorrow, for the cookies. And I'd love to meet Maria one day, if she's up for it."

"I'm sure she'd love to meet you. I'll bring her by."

"Thanks, Rafael."

"Of course. Thank you."

"Of course."

That night, when your Mom calls, you get to tell her you've made a new friend. That makes the both of you very happy.

✵  ✵    ·　 ✵ 　　 *  · ✵

You're testing out a recipe in the kitchen of your new apartment when your phone rings.

"Hey, Dad."

"Hey, kiddo. You doing okay?"

"Yeah, I am, actually. I'm settling in."

"Good, I'm glad. I don't wanna keep you on the phone for too long, but I wanted to ask you something."

"Go ahead, Dad. Anything."

"How would you feel about surprising your Mom for her birthday?"

"What kind of surprise?"

"I know you haven't been gone all that long, and I know it's kind of last minute, but, I was thinking you could come back to... be her gift? She really misses you, you know."

"I miss her too," you say softly, trying to keep your voice even. "I'll talk to Stella, see if we can figure something out. I'd really love to see you guys."

"We'd really love to see you too, sweetheart."

"I'll call you back later, when I've organised everything. Love you, Dad. See you soon, hopefully."

"Love you, kiddo. Proud of you, you know."

"I know," you smile. "I know."

✵  ✵    ·　 ✵ 　　 *  · ✵

The journey always seems shorter when you know you're going home.

You make it back in record time, salty ocean breeze whipping through your hair as you cruise along the roads. You take a deep breath and sigh it out, relief filling your lungs. It's good to be back.

You can't let your Mom see you, so you head straight back to your apartment. Your Dad told you they're in the process of renting it out, but they haven't made much progress yet. For now, it's still yours.

You inhale the familiar scent, smiling gently. There's something so particular about the way a place smells when you feel like you belong there. It's like home and comfort and ease all rolled into one.

You unpack a little, folding your clothes and tucking them into the dresser. You told Stella you'd probably stay a few days, wanting to spend as much time with your family as possible. You're rifling through the refrigerator and thinking about a grocery list when there's a knock at your door.

You know who it is.

A feeling of relief washes over your body, tension melting from your shoulders. Your lungs fill easier, your breath falls deeper, everything is a little brighter, a little more colourful.

You open the door to be met with the sight of Bucky Barnes.

He's in work pants and a white t shirt that's stained with grease and oil, heavy boots on his feet. He must have come straight from the Garage.

He looks at you carefully, as if he isn't sure that you're real. You rake your eyes over his form, trying to drink him in. All the pictures you've taken and saved don't do him justice.

He exhales, beaming grin appearing on his face.

"You're here."

You can't help but smile back, his happiness spreading through you.

"I'm here."

Bucky rushes forward and scoops you into his arms, enveloping you completely. He wraps himself around you as he tucks you into his chest, his grip tight and unrelenting. You breathe him in, overwhelmed with emotion and sensation. You didn't realise how much you needed this. Three months is too long.

"What are you doing here?" he asks, slight shake in his voice. He's holding off tears. So are you.

"My Dad wanted me to surprise my Mom for her birthday. It's all a secret."

He smiles, before leaning down to capture your lips in a knee buckling kiss. A kiss that says I missed you. A kiss that says I need you. A kiss that says please don't leave me again.

"How did you know?" you whisper when you pull away for air.

"I felt it. I think I knew the moment you arrived back in town. Thought my mind was playing tricks on me, for a second. But there's no mistaking that feeling. I had to come and see for myself."

"We're getting pretty good at this whole soulmate thing, huh?" you laugh, unaware of the tears running down your face. "I missed you, Buck. So much."

"I missed you too," he murmurs, kissing you again. "Didn't think I was going to survive, some days."

"Me too. Do you know how many times I stood with my car keys in my hand, ready to drive back to you?"

He chuckles and then sniffles, emotion dripping down his cheeks.

"I did exactly the same thing. So many times."

You wrap your arms around his middle, reveling in the way he smells like gasoline and home.

"How long are you here for?" he murmurs, worried he'll disturb the peace.

"I'm not sure. A good few days, at least."

"Okay," he breathes. "I can do a few days. We can do a few days."

"Sorry I didn't tell you sooner. I didn't know, to be honest. It was all kinda last minute."

"It's okay, pretty thing," he mutters into your hair. "It was a nice surprise."

"You're coming tonight, right? To my Mom's party?"

"Wouldn't miss it."

You stay wrapped up in each other for a little while longer, savouring his warmth. He rubs absentminded patterns across the skin of your back, committing the softness of it to his memory.

"I should probably get back to work. I took off with no warning."

"You're the boss. You're allowed," you chuckle.

He laughs with you, and the sound lights up your nerves, illuminates your bones. It settles itself in the hollows of your ribcage, tangles itself in your heartstrings. It's like medicine.

"Can't wait to see you tonight," you whisper. "Wear something cute."

"I always do," he winks, pressing a kiss to your forehead. "Miss you already."

"Miss you more."

He looks at you, smiling.

"Man, we're the worst."

"Truly."

He kisses you once, twice, three times before finally leaving, reluctant to let you go. You spend the rest of the afternoon floating on air, relaxed and at ease. You haven't felt like this in a while.

✵  ✵    ·　 ✵ 　　 *  · ✵

Your Dad sneaks you into the house through the side door, hiding you in the kitchen as he ushers your Mom through to the back yard.

It's decorated with floral garlands and streamers, flowers in vases covering the table he's set up. The golden, warm fairy lights illuminate the space, keeping it soft and intimate. He's been watching, carefully observing the way that she does things. He's recreated her party style perfectly.

There's a few of her closest friends waiting for her, gifts littering the spare chairs. Your Dad walks her outside, hands covering her eyes.

"Surprise!"

You watch through the door as your Mom gasps, grin on her face.

"Oh my God! You guys!"

She runs into your Dad, wrapping her arms around his neck.

"I can't believe you managed to pull this off," she says in disbelief.

He sets her back down on the ground and kisses her gently.

"I got you something. I hope you like it."

That's your cue. You sneak out as quietly as possible, standing behind her.

"Happy Birthday, Mama."

She whips around to face you, shock written across her face. Her eyes well up, tears threatening to spill. Yours do the same, bottom lip quivering.

She throws her arms around you, tugging you into her.

"I'm so happy you're here, baby girl. I missed you so much."

"Missed you. You look beautiful."

"Not as beautiful as you! Look at you, all sun kissed and glowy. You look so pretty, sweetheart."

You grin at her and she does the same back, your Dad beaming at your identical smiles.

"You're the best gift I've ever received. Then and now."

You're overwhelmed, suddenly, by the realisation that no matter what happens, no matter what life throws at you, no matter how many miles are between you - your Mom will always be in your corner. Your Dad will always be in your corner. Bucky will always be in your corner.

You think, for a moment, that despite everything, you might just be okay.

✵  ✵    ·　 ✵ 　　 *  · ✵

The night goes off without a hitch.

You drink, you laugh, you sing. You and your Mom dance to ABBA, Bowie, Donna Summer. Your Dad joins in, and can't help but grin every time he watches his girls together.

What a life, he thinks. I'm the luckiest man in the world.

When everyone gets a little past tipsy, your Mom changes the music to something slower, jazzier, richer. Your Dad pulls her into his chest, holding her close as they move to the melody. You're sat at the table taking off your heels when Bucky slides into the seat next to you. He pulls your foot into his lap and undoes the strap, sliding the shoe off gently. He rubs his thumb into your sole, smirking when you groan.

"Have you been avoiding me tonight, pretty baby?"

His cheeks are flushed slightly, top few buttons of his shirt open. He's been drinking a little, his walls lowered more than usual.

"I have to."

"Oh yeah?"

"I feel like I'm gonna burst into flames every time you look at me," you whisper. "I kinda want to rip your clothes off, baby."

He groans at the nickname. You know exactly what you're doing.

"It only takes one look for a minute too long to figure out how I feel about you, Buck. They'll work it all out instantly."

"Dance with me," he murmurs suddenly. "Your parents are too busy staring into each others eyes. Come on, honey. One dance."

His big blue eyes bore into yours, and you know you're fucked. You're never going to be able to say no to him.

"One dance," you whisper.

He takes your hand and leads you to the decked area, brightened by the golden lights. Bucky slides a hand over your back, resting there carefully. You intertwine your fingers with his and step into him, embracing the warmth that rolls off his body.

I'll Be Seeing You by Billie Holiday begins to play, and the two of you start to sway gently, eyes never leaving each others. Bucky pulls you in closer, and you melt into him. You don't care about the repercussions anymore.

Maybe it's the wine talking. Maybe it's something else.

✵  ✵    ·　 ✵ 　　 *  · ✵

"That was close!"

Your Mom's giggling as your Dad holds her, having just saved her from tripping down the front steps. Everyone's giddy, both from drinking and from laughing.

"Sweetheart. Bucky. Come back for lunch tomorrow. Your Dad ordered too much catering, and we need help eating it."

"Mama, are you sure?"

"I want to see you as much as possible before you go, babygirl. You too, Buck. I feel like we don't see you as much as we used to."

"He'll be there," you reply before he can protest. "We'll carpool, and I'll bring a strawberry and cream tart that I made for you."

She kisses you on the cheek, your Dad leaning in to kiss the other side.

"Love you both."

"Love you," they say in unison, laughing and yelling jinx. "Get home safe, you two!"

"I'll take care of her," Bucky chuckles. "Always."

✵  ✵    ·　 ✵ 　　 *  · ✵

"Why don't you see my parents much anymore?"

You and Buck are walking home along the sandy coastal path, fingers intertwined and sides pressed together. You look up at him, frowning slightly when he hesitates.

"Don't lie to me, James. I can feel it, remember."

You place a hand on your chest to remind him, and he nods.

"It's not the same here without you."

You weren't expecting the sincerity. It knocks you off balance a little.

You stop when you reach a wooden bench, sitting down and pulling him with you.

"So you're isolating yourself from the people who love you?"

He smiles, sadness rife in his eyes. Your tough guy act is crumbling.

"Not on purpose. It just kinda happened."

"You promised you'd talk to me, Buck. Especially if it got too hard. You need to accept support from people, or everything is going to come crashing down."

"I know. I know. But every time I go to their house, I'm expecting you to be there. Every time I go to the beach, I'm expecting you to be there. Every time I walk past your building, I'm expecting you to be there, waiting for me to pick you up. Even when I'm sailing, I can't stop thinking about that day we spent on the boat."

"The other day I had to make three batches of buttercream, because I messed up the first two. I was so distracted thinking about you that I split them both."

He laughs, then, wholehearted and genuine. You can't help but join him, shaking your head at the absurdity of it all.

"Bucky, you have to promise that you'll keep going, even without me. You have to see my Mom and Dad like you used to, you have to still sail and go to the beach. You can't put your life on hold for me."

He takes a deep breath, sliding an arm around your shoulders to pull you in closer.

"Okay. I promise."

You whip your head around to look at him.

"Just like that?"

"Just like that, honey. You're right. I've been waiting for you to come back, so I can start living again. But life is still happening, whether you're here or not."

"Wise words, wise man," you smile. "Not a minute goes by where I don't think of you. You know that, don't you?"

"I know. I feel it."

You watch as he brings your linked hands to his chest, placing them there. You rest your head on his shoulder, lulled into calm by the steady melody of his heart. You swear it beats to the rhythm of your name.

✵  ✵    ·　 ✵ 　　 *  · ✵

The two of you can't bear the idea of separating, so Buck comes home with you.

"Have you got a blanket?" he asks as he's kicking off his shoes.

"I have. What for?"

"The couch."

You process for a moment before it clicks.

"You're not sleeping on the couch, Buck."

"No?"

"No. I want your ridiculous, radiator-like body heat in bed with me."

He smiles, all giddy and lopsided, before striding across the room to you. Cradling your face in his rough hands, he kisses you with fervour. He's making up for lost time.

You tangle your fingers into his hair, tugging and pulling, smirking when he groans. He retaliates by grabbing your ass and picking you up, wrapping your legs around his waist. He carries you through to your bedroom, lips never leaving yours.

Throwing you down onto the bed, he pulls his shirt over his head, watching you hungrily as you do the same with your dress. You're left in your underwear, leaving little to the imagination.

"You're so beautiful," he murmurs. "Makes me want to cry."

You reach for him as he settles on top of you, your hand sliding along his stubbled cheek.

"I'm so glad you're feeling what I'm feeling," you whisper. "I'd think I was going insane otherwise."

Bucky kisses you again, before trailing his lips across your jaw, your ear, your neck. He's careful not to leave any marks, as much as he wants to. You glide your hands along the expanse of his shoulders, his back, his biceps. He's so strong, so broad. It makes you ache.

"So fuckin' pretty," he mumbles against your chest. "Like a goddamn dream."

You throw your head back as he attaches his mouth to your tits, nipping and sucking as he goes. Your hands are in his hair again, reveling in the way his groans vibrate through you.

Bucky slots his knee in between your legs as he kisses across your chest, smirking when you grind your hips into it. You chase the friction as best you can, moaning when it hits you just right.

"Needy baby. You don't want my fingers? My mouth? No? Just my knee?"

You nod, then shake your head. You're not sure what you're asking for, drunk on him already.

"Please, Buck. Anything."

"I'll give you whatever you want if you keep saying my name like that."

He makes quick work of pulling your underwear down your legs, swiping his fingers through your wet heat.

"Oh, fuck," he chokes. "Fuck, honey. Is this all for me? Hmm?"

"Yes, yes, yes."

"Yeah?"

"It's yours, Buck. I'm yours."

Bucky drops his head forward, bumping your nose with his.

"I think that's my favourite thing you've ever said," he mumbles against your mouth.

You reach up to kiss him, sucking his tongue before biting at his lips. You can't get close enough. Every inch of your skin is pressed to his, and you still want more.

Bucky crawls down the bed, situating himself between your legs. He nudges at you with his nose before diving in, lapping at you like a man starved.

You'd forgotten what people said about sex when you're Tethered, but it all comes back to you now. Everything is heightened, your senses on overdrive. It's like Bucky has the handbook to your body, and all he has to do is read the instructions the Universe has given him.

He's got you teetering on the edge in no time, right on the precipice. No ones ever made you feel like this. It feels like some sort of small miracle is happening, an otherworldly connection.

"Give it to me, honey baby," he murmurs into you. "Let me see how pretty you look when you come."

You tug at his hair as you reach your climax, the vibrations of his groan only prolonging your release. Bucky helps you ride it out, only ceasing his action when he's satisfied you're satisfied.

He rests his head against your thigh and looks up at you as you come down, breathing heavily.

"You good?"

"So good," you grin. "Never better."

"Me neither," he whispers, crawling up your body to kiss you again. You taste yourself and whine, desperate to feel closer to him.

"Need you," you demand against his lips. "Need you more than anything."

"I know, baby," he soothes as he smooths the hair back from your face. "Gonna give you everything you want. Anything in the world."

You're on the verge of tears again, completely overwhelmed. He's looking at you like you hung the stars in the sky just for him. You think maybe you would, if he asked you to.

Bucky slides home in one gentle thrust, easy as breathing. The both of you exhale, savouring the moment. It's like nothing either of you have ever felt before.

You pull his face down to you, resting your foreheads against each other.

"Buck, I-"

"I know," he breathes. "Fuck, I know."

"Need you to move, baby."

He nods and kisses you sweetly, before pulling his hips back and gliding forward. The angle is just right, both of you keening.

"Fuck, honey. So pretty. So tight. Fuck."

Bucky sets a steady rhythm, not too fast, not too slow. It's like he can read your mind, knowing exactly what you need. All you can say is his name as stars cloud your vision.

He slides his hand down your front, rubbing perfect circles on your clit with his fingers. You clamp down on him and he groans, low and gutteral.

"Need you to come, pretty baby," he whispers hoarsely. "Please. Waited so long for this. Please."

The desperation in his tone is what throws you into your release, muscles tensing and back arched. You grip his biceps, scratching your nails into his sun kissed skin.

Bucky can't hold on any longer, falling over the edge with you. The way he says your name as he does will be ingrained in your mind forever.

He drops his weight onto you entirely, no longer able to hold himself up. You wrap your arms around him, drawing absent minded patterns across his back. You're both sweating and panting. You're both completely content.

"Holy shit," he whispers after a while.

"You think it's gonna be like that every time?" you ask, grinning.

Bucky rolls off you and lands on the bed beside you, pulling you into his chest.

"Honey, just you wait. I've got moves you've never seen."

You snort, unable to hold in your laughter. You're floating on cloud nine, satiated and warm.

"You're the worst," you giggle, running your fingers over his abs gently.

The two of you stay intertwined for hours, enjoying the way your bodies fit together like two pieces of a puzzle. You both drift in and out of sleep, conversing in the gaps. At some points, you just lay in silence, completely comfortable. No one needs to say anything. You both know what the other person is thinking.

Eventually, the sun rises, casting the room in a golden orange glow. Bucky looks like an angel, illuminated by the morning light. You wonder for a second if he is, sent down as a gift to you.

Suddenly, you feel an intense sadness in your chest. You look up at Bucky from where you lay across him, and see a single tear drip down his cheek.

"I don't want you to go."

The only sound that can be heard is his sorrow hitting the pillow.

"I don't think I want to go."

He strokes your hair softly, taking a deep breath to try and get a handle on his emotions.

"You have to, baby. It's your dream."

Your bottom lip wobbles for a second, before the words come spilling out.

"You're my dream."

Bucky sniffles, and you continue.

"I could have nothing, but I have everything if I have you."

You sit up and Bucky does too, capturing your lips in a tear stained kiss.

"We'll be okay, my honey girl."

You crawl into his lap and wrap your arms around his neck, letting his warmth bleed into your bones.

"I know," you say, unsure if you're trying to convince yourself or him.

You know you'll be okay. It just doesn't feel like it right now.

You wonder how many times you can keep leaving and coming back before one of your hearts breaks for good.

tag list part one

@lillytracy6996 @securegorgon @roostersforevergirl @povlvr @val-writesstuff   @dreadfulxives18 @1deadpool26 @abbygraceasd @nyutasgirl @mavrellover91 @winterslove1917 @f-this42 @skewedcherries @noisesinthedark @kandis-mom @black-cat-2 @harrystylesandthegoobs @vladsgirlxx @h0nestly-though @arienotari @nash-dara   @wandaneedstherapy @galaxy-dusk @justherefortheficandsmut @cremebruleequeen   @cjand10 @buggy14 @avengers-fixation @blueberrybambi @beautiful-loserr @sarah1barnes @miss-rebel-without-applause @ragingrainbowshipl @shamrockqueen @savemeroman @jenn-f @8crazy-freak8 @daddyjackfrost @openup-yourmind @adangerousbalance  @mandijo17 @daddylorianisastateofmind @rcarbo1 @casa-boiardi @spideegwen @navs-bhat @mssbridgerton @asuni921 @middle-of-the-earth @mfrnchsk

[macabr3-barbi3]

New Love, New Skin (Chapter 7)

one more GoldenVision update before 2025! huge thanks as always to my beloved @fraugwinska for her never ending support and love for these two as I continue to put them through the wringer (and also for the lovely banner she made for me <3)

you can see the playlist I made for this fic and series here!

Vincent has a perfect plan, but every choice has a consequence.

Chapter 1 📺 Chapter 2 💛 Chapter 3 📺  Chapter 4  💛 Chapter 5 📺 Chapter 6 💛Chapter 7

March 1961

Vincent knows as soon as he sees it that it’s the one.

He had stopped into the jewelry store on a whim, having to take a different route home than usual because some idiot had wrecked their car down the street he usually took. He hadn’t thought something like a jewelry store could survive in Hell without being robbed on a near daily basis, but the series of guns that he heard cocking as soon as the bell above the door signaled his entrance explained that well enough for him. He had looked over the cases for only a few minutes before he spotted it.

He doesn’t even look at the price when he waves the attendant down, hardly even turning his head to acknowledge the woman in favor of watching the ring, glistening in the display case, and making sure it wasn’t going anywhere. Kora would love it- a delicate golden band adorned with a tiny cluster of soft green stones to either side of a modest diamond. It wasn’t overly loud or large, only having caught Vincent’s eye because it was so much more discreet than some of the others in the shop.

Kora didn’t wear a lot of jewelry, opting instead to express herself with her fun t-shirts and her words. But a ring like this- something subtle without seeming cheap, its purpose and meaning obvious without being tacky or drawing attention- he thought she would appreciate enough to wear it regularly, make sure that people knew that she was his as much as he was hers. He wasn’t totally sure how something like engagement worked in Hell, but this, at least, would serve as his promise to her. Something to show her that he was committed to her, that he wasn’t going anywhere. That he loved her back. 

Vincent still hadn’t said it. But he felt it in the kick of his heart every time he looked at her; cuddled up during one of their rare times together these days, watching television on the couch; fast asleep when he came home late from work and she hadn’t been able to wait up for him, his pillow clutched to her chest like a lifeline; when she whispered it to him as she got ready for the day, said with the press of her lips to his screen while he was groggy and half awake. It consumed him, the need for her to know what she meant to him despite how busy he had been lately, that it was all for her.

The chances of it being stolen from her while working at the diner in the short time between giving it to her and when she would no longer have to work seemed slim, because the latter was closer than ever before.

The attendant returns with the ring, nestled delicately on a velvet pad for him to pick up and inspect, and the path before him is suddenly laid out so clearly in his mind it felt as solid as the ring between his fingers.

He could almost taste that top spot. Vincent felt the eyes of the executives on him whenever he filled in for someone, when he showed up on his days off, coming in before everyone else and not going home until he was the last one left from the overnight crew. He filled in for the morning team sometimes as well, anyone that wasn’t as reliable or dedicated as he was; he had done weather, cooking segments, sports coverage, anything and everything they would let him do. The praise that flowed for him was near constant, Rich always there to offer him a spot of advice or sing of his merit to the higher ups. Joy was a thorn in his side- she had never gotten over his siding with Kora after an incident at the Christmas party a couple of years back- but it was easy to tune her out when he thought about how he would soon be calling the shots for the late news.

Calling the shots for all of the news, by the time he had finished climbing the ladder the way he wanted.

And once he was on top, it would all be worth it. He wouldn’t have to work so hard to prove himself worthy of respect and could take regular time off, spoil her the way she deserved. They would finally have what he had been working so hard to provide for them; no more late mornings hunched over scripts, when Kora was off to work by the time he got home, or missing the Sunday grocery shopping like he had been. No more worries on her end about rent or being able to afford her little pleasures. A regular schedule where they could fall asleep together again, curled in one another’s arms, wake to the warmth of each other’s bodies before spending the days doing whatever they wanted, instead of what was needed to get by.

“Sir?” The attendant’s voice pulls him from the thoughts of their future and back to the present, and he feels a spark of static between the antennae on his head. “Will you be purchasing today?”

“Yes,” he says with no hesitation, pulling his wallet from his pocket. The price is nothing to him, not when everything he had ever wanted was so close, his efforts finally on the cusp of paying off.

When the transaction is over, the velvet box sits comfortably in his jacket pocket as he makes his way home. The sky is bright and red, and a glance at his watch tells him that Kora will already be out and about for her deliveries this morning. All the better, as it will give him a chance to hide the ring before she got home; he wanted everything to be perfect when he gave it to her, his promotion to be as good as guaranteed and their future well secured. He would take a day off, treat her like a princess, spend some good quality time together before he sprang it on her and watched her face light up with happiness when he finally told her he loved her, that everything would be better soon.

He keeps the box clutched tightly in his hand the whole way home, something dangerously like hope beating a rapid rhythm in his chest.

It comes even quicker than he expects- and at the worst time possible.

He told Kora to take off the next Friday after he bought the ring, that he had something important to discuss with her and he wanted to spend some quality time together, and his Golden Girl had come alive, peppering his face with kisses and sweet talk before she went to work to talk to Viv, confirming her day off with him with a sticky note to the fridge. He confirmed with Rich that he would be taking the day as well, resulting in a clap on his back and a wink when he mentioned Kora.

The box burned a hole in his pocket the whole time; his ‘hiding place’ that he settled on was his work blazer, hung by the door with Kora none the wiser of its presence. He rubbed his thumb across the soft velvet so many times he worried there would be a groove in it, but every time he checked it was just as pristine and perfect as when he bought it. The gems in the ring still caught the light in the most perfect way, and once when Kora was sleeping he had oh-so-carefully slid it onto her finger to ensure a perfect fit. The sight of it made his chest ache, and he had pressed a kiss with trembling lips to her forehead after slipping it back into its box.

His plan was perfect- not Dante’s for this special occasion, like they had spent the two-year anniversary of her rescue of him, but the skating rink. That was where she had introduced him to her friends, showed everyone that he was hers, cemented her feelings for him before even saying she loved him, and Kora had been so in her element the last time they had gone; he regretted not being able to take her more frequently. But fuck, once he got everything he was working towards, he could buy her a skating rink- build one in their house if they wanted. She would never want for anything if he could provide it for her.

This afternoon, she was in the bathroom applying some kind of makeup, her hair pulled into a soft bun that let some curls loose around her face. She wore the twirly skirt that he loved from last time, one that he knew would flair when she spun and show off her strong legs. He already couldn’t wait until they got home- he would peel it off her slowly, take his time in a way they hadn’t been able to for a while, watch the lights reflect off the stones of the ring-

The phone rings, pulling his concentration from his thoughts of when they returned. He answers with a smile still present in his tone, but when he hears Rich’s voice on the other line his stomach drops.

“Vinny, my boy! Look, I’m sorry to reach out like this- I know you had a day planned with Kora- but you gotta get down to the station.”

Anxiety flashes through his system. “I’m- I really can’t today, Rich,” he tries, voice lowered so Kora won’t hear him. “This is really important, I’ve had it requested for almost two weeks.”

Rich sighs in his ear. “I know, I know, and I wouldn’t ask if I didn’t need it. Listen-” He lowers his voice, and Vincent can hear the rustle of his clothing as he looks around. “You didn’t hear this from me, but the execs have had their eyes on you and have just been waiting for a chance to put you in the spotlight. The real spotlight, not just filling in.”

“I-”

“This is that chance, Vin. They’re wanting to move me to the early morning crew- fucking Brandon got himself caught during the extermination in January and no one else can work with that Shelby bitch for more than a few weeks at a time- and they’ve been looking for someone to fill my spot on the late show, for good. They want to run a test of the new proposed line up today- apparently no one looks at the schedule to see when people are off. They were expecting you early like you always are so they can adapt the lighting to account for your screen brightness. They want to see that you can handle it.”

Fuck.

Fuck, fuck, fuck. Kora was going to kill him.

But he couldn’t turn this down- not when this was what he had been working for after. Not when this was the final stepping stone to being where he needed to be so he could do right by Kora. He had been wanting to give her the ring early,  a sign of what was to come for them, but now it could be a symbol of what already was- the future already in motion. She would be upset with him today, but she would understand when it was all said and done.

Rich’s voice is muffled on the other end of the line when Vincent takes the phone from his ear and lays it on his shoulder, resting his screen against the fridge. Over the humming of it he can hear Kora humming to herself in the bathroom with the door open, probably putting the finishing touches on looking perfect for him.

“-still there?” He hears when he brings the phone back to his head. “I’ll make sure I’m available to cover another night for you- work a double if I need to but I don’t want you to miss this opportunity-”

“I’ll be there,” he says, and of course it’s at this moment that Kora exits, and even not fully turned towards her he can see the shadow of her tail droop. “Give me- I don’t know, ten minutes and I’ll head out.”

“Attaboy!” Rich exclaims in his ear, “and tell your Golden Girl I’m sorry to steal you away. But this is gonna be huge for you, Vinny, HUGE!” He shouts the last word and hangs up with a click, leaving Vincent to face the choice he had made.

Her face is sad, arms crossed defensively across her chest. “Are you leaving?” She asks quietly, and it kills him to break her heart like this.

“I have to,” he says, and her eyebrows crease with some unreadable expression. “It’s… it’s what I’ve been working so hard for. They want me to take over for Rich-”

“They can’t postpone that for one more night?”

“I know, baby, I’m sorry.” He crosses the living room to stand beside her, hand reaching out to caress her cheek; she leans into it, huffing a soft sigh into his palm. “It’s a huge opportunity though, and if I can’t be there, who knows who they would offer it to next?” 

Vincent can see it in her expression- the want to dispute what he was saying, convince him to stick to their original plan. And he wants to- he really, really does- but this was what his whole plan for the future was riding on.

“I might not be able to get another night off anytime soon,” she tells him. “Besides Sunday- and what’s the point then if you don’t take it off, too?”

He presses a kiss to her forehead. “I know, Goldie, and I’m sorry,” he says again. “I wouldn’t cancel for just anything- it’s really important.” He steps back and she grabs hold of his hand, grip firm when he tries to tug away.

“Vin, come on- I never see you anymore, you can’t just keep the one day off you requested specifically to spend time with me?” Her eyes well with tears, and he diverts his gaze so he doesn’t see them- he’s always been weak to it, to her, but the ring that sat like a rock in his pocket was for nothing if he didn’t land this position. “You said this was important- that was why we took the day off.”

He sighs, squeezing her hand and releasing- this time, she doesn’t try to hold on. “I’ll ask another day off soon, I promise.”

She pulls back a step, expression hurt. “You haven’t had more than a day off at a time in ages, Vincent. I miss you-”

“When I get this promotion we’ll see each other more,” he says, a hint of irritation spiking at her continued wheedling. Didn’t she realize he was doing this for her? The long hours, the pushing for more at work, saving money; it was all so she could get what she deserved, so he could give her the life he wanted her to have. “I really have to go.” He starts towards the door, groaning in irritation when she blocks his path. “Kora, come on- move.”

“No.” She stands her ground, arms crossed across her chest in a way that shouldn’t have been cute, but even in her anger she was beautiful. “What is going on with you? You’re never home anymore, when you are home you just sleep, you don’t go out to do the grocery shopping with me anymore or spend any time with me beyond a quick fuck when you can spare a couple minutes before leaving again.”

A pang of guilt flickers in his chest, but it was drowned out by his own frustration. How could she not see? He wasn’t doing this for some selfish reason—he was trying to build a life, a future where she didn’t have to worry about a damn thing. He fingered the small velvet box in his pocket, the one he’d planned to give her today, that had been on the peripheral of his mind since he bought it. But then the call came- this could be the end of it, the confirmation about his position, his security for their future. The ring, that promise, it had to wait for that. “Move,” he demands again, and when she doesn’t immediately comply his hand shoots out to grab her bicep, forcibly moving her to the side.

The sound she makes is likely more from shock than pain, but tears well in her eyes regardless. “What the fuck is wrong with you? You’ve been making it seem like none of this matters, like I don’t matter. Why are you acting like this?”

The tension inside of him unravels quick as a whip. “I’m not acting,” he snaps, and she takes a step back in shock at the harsh coolness of his tone. “This is what I am, Kora, you didn’t change me when you picked me up off the street- you just delayed the inevitable. Fucking leave if you don’t like it.”

The silence that follows is suffocating; when he looks over, Kora’s eyes are glassy and wet, her lip quivering. His heart pounds as the regret creeps in, winding like vines around his heart- but his pride keeps him from taking it back, taking her into his arms with an apology and an explanation. He wanted to tell her about the ring, the life he’d been trying to secure for them; why he had been pushing so hard, why he was choosing to leave her today. His vocals stutter when he speaks. “I-”

Love you. He almost says it, the words on the tip of his tongue like his stupid brain thinks that will rectify the situation, the ring box in his pocket weighted like its made of something heavier than a bit of gold and diamond and velvet. If he says it now, it would be tainted by the moment, by the fight they found themselves in. She had waited for too long for it to be some cheap thing he said to keep her from being upset with him. “I’ll be home late,” he mutters instead. “We can talk when I come home, okay?” 

He would fix everything tomorrow, he tells himself as he tries to catch a cab for a faster trip, refusing to look back to the door of the apartment. Rich would make sure he got a day off, especially if he told him what today had been for- then he could show Kora the ring and explain. Once he got the promotion everything would get resolved, and she would see that everything had had a purpose, it was all for something. For her.

“... and that’s all we have for you tonight, folks- keep those doors locked and those windows closed, you never know who might come creeping through.” Vincent flashes a wide grin at the cameras, the lights of the studio dialed down to adapt to the brightness of his head. Rich had come back in to see the rest of his test run, shooting him a smile and a thumbs up from the sidelines. He could feel Joy’s eyes on him as well, but he had been ignoring her as best he could- banter was expected between co-anchors though, so he engaged her when he needed to. 

To the left of him, he sees the image he casts on televisions all over the rings of Pride, and he looks good. His blazer is pressed and wrinkle-free, screen buffed to a shine that forced the crew to adjust some spotlights to avoid blinding anyone, and his sharp-toothed smile is flawless and fierce. The timer was ticking down to the end of the broadcast, and Vincent leans forward onto his elbow on the desk. “This is Vincent-”

“-and Joy-”

“-signing off from Nine Rings News.” They speak the last line in unison, and Vincent can see on the televisions set up that the channel has cut to commercial, the first of many that will play for the next few hours until it’s time for Rich’s new slot. The room erupts into cheers, Joy leaning back in her chair to eye him appreciatively. The production crew surrounds him, taking his notes off his hands, disconnecting his equipment as they offer his praise and words of encouragement. 

Rich approaches with a slap to the back that knocks the wind out of him. “I fucking knew you would be a hit,” he says over the chorus of final congratulations, grabbing his arm and shaking it vigorously. “Let’s head out to celebrate! I have a couple hours still before I have to be back for my segment- that’s plenty of time for a couple rounds at Spite! You can ring Kora, see if she wants to come out with us if she’s not working to make up for missing your plans today.”

At the mention of Kora, Vincent’s excitement gets a little muddled,  feeling the way a glitch crackles across his screen as he remembers their fight, the way she had cried when he snapped at her and made her move. She would be asleep by now, even if she had decided to pick up a shift once their plans were canceled- he wouldn’t wake her for this, not with the way that he had left. He throws an arm around Rich’s shoulder and steers him away from the crowd. “I appreciate it, Rich, but really- I gotta get home and talk to her. We had a pretty bad fight when I left, she was really looking forward to spending the day together.” He fingers the box in his pocket again, the velvet smooth and soft under his thumb. “I was too,” he adds, and he pulls the ring out to show to his mentor.

If Rich’s eye had been capable of widening, it would have done so- his shock is evident in the way his jaw drops though, taking the box with careful fingers and opening it to inspect. “Satan’s left ball, Vinnie, you could have mentioned you were planning to ask the girl to marry you today! Fuck, I would have found a way to put the execs off if I had known you had plans this important.”

Vincent shrugs, can almost feel the pink tint take over his screen. “This was important too,” he tells him, “this was what I’ve been working so hard for. And now that I’ve done the test run, they’ve seen what I can do, it feels as good as mine, right?”

“Now that they know you’re committed and you look and sound fucking fantastic in that main anchor spot, you should get an official offer in the next couple of days,” Rich assures him, closing the velvet box with a snap and handing it back to Vincent. “You don’t see a lot of ‘marriages’ in Hell, you know. It’s exciting though, and I’m happy for you.”

“Never thought about asking that old PA to settle down, huh?”

Rich cocks his head to the side. “Do you know what the process of ‘getting married’ looks like down here, Vin? It’s a little different from topside- you actually give a piece of your soul to your partner. It’s basically a deal set between the two of you with whatever stipulations you have for the partnership, which is like the Hell equivalent of a prenup. It’s a pretty serious commitment- if have any sort of Overlord aspirations, that’s really something you should take into consideration-”

“I don’t,” he interrupts. “My job and Kora are what’s most important to me, I don’t need all that power and hassle that comes with being an Overlord.” He pockets the ring again, keeping his hands there to hide the tremor in them. “I have to get through her being mad at me now before any talk of the future happens though.”

“Put the whole thing on me,” Rich advises as he leads him to the door, “just tell her it was all my fault, and she can come down here and give me a scolding whenever she would like.” He guides Vincent to the door and gives him another parting slap on the back. “Apologize to your Golden Girl for me, will ya? And good luck!”

“Thanks, Rich,” he says, and the back door closes with a crack that echoes in the alley. The smile he’s been wearing for almost ten hours finally fades, and if he had had a jaw it would have ached. He pulls the ring box out again and opens it, looking at the reflections off the gems in the streetlight before he puts it away again.

He lights a cigarette as he walks home, the streets of Hell mostly empty but for shadows that lurk in the alleys and the hum of huge neon signs plastered all over the city. The adrenaline of the night still buzzed in his veins along with the nicotine, a spring to his step that even Kora’s inevitable anger with him couldn’t dull. He still felt guilty, but it was tempered with a sense of justification in his actions. The pieces would all fall into place now that he had proven himself with the network, their future as good as guaranteed. Kora would understand when he explained.

It was nearing four in the morning when Vincent made it home, but the lights were still on in the living room- either she had woken up early for her walk, or she had never gone to sleep. He runs a hand over his screen and takes a deep breath as he approaches the door, surprised to find it unlocked but still opening it slowly so he doesn’t startle her. “Kora?”

The living room is empty as he enters, the smell of burnt popcorn coming into his processors- she never followed the instructions correctly, which was why the rare times they had to snack together he was in charge of it. Her stack of books that she cycled through on the coffee table had been toppled, the bowl of burned popcorn having followed suit, her blanket thrown haphazardly onto the cushions in a way that made it slide towards the floor. He picks it up and catches the familiar almond and honey scent of her before he tosses it back onto the couch properly and comes further into the apartment.

“Goldie?” He keeps his voice low as he peeks into the bathroom and moves to the bedroom, in case he was wrong and she was sleeping and had simply forgotten to turn the lights off. But the bedroom is empty as well, the sheets still rumpled the same way they had been when the pair of them had gotten ready this morning. Her nightstand drawer is open, the framed photo of her and Gideon resting on the floor with a spider web fracture in the glass panel that distorted their faces. The window sat open, a breeze drifting through the open pane. “Kora,” he calls again a little louder, because she has to be somewhere in the building- she wouldn’t take off for no reason, even with the fight that they had had.

He winces at the memory of their again, words that he had said in anger that he didn’t mean. He had just been so frustrated that she didn’t understand what he was working towards that he had snapped at her-

“Fucking leave if you don’t like it.”

Panic settles into his chest behind the thumping of his heart, but he forces himself to remain calm. She wouldn’t have just left like that- not without a conversation, even as angry and hurt as she had been, even with the words he had spit at her. If she was going to leave she would have waited for him to come home so they could talk about it first.

And regardless of that- she wouldn’t leave. She loved him- more than she should. Certainly more than he deserved. 

Her clothes were all still hung on the rack in their room, her socks and underwear and shirts still folded in the drawers of their dresser. When he navigates back out to the living area, her punny coffee mugs are still happily displayed on the rack he had gotten her for Christmas. Kora wouldn’t leave those behind, not with the effort she put into finding them and incorporating them into her home. She had to just be on her walk; maybe she had woken up early and left before Vincent came home, and she would return soon. That’s what he convinces himself of as he cleans up, tidying her stack of books on the coffee table, closing the window and putting her photo of Gideon in the drawer of her nightstand. He resolves to wait for her to come back so they can talk, but as he settles onto the couch and pulls the blanket over his lap, sleep claims him too quickly to resist.

He awakens hours later from dreamless sleep, disoriented, finding himself still on the couch. Kora usually woke him when he fell asleep there instead of the bedroom- and then he remembers that Kora hadn’t been home when he returned from work yesterday, and from the looks of it had still not come back. A glance at the clock reveals that it’s well past noon, and when Vincent stumbles up from the couch to check the bedroom, the bathroom, Kora isn’t there.

“Fucking leave if you don’t like it.”

Despair claws its way into his throat, his lungs feeling constricted while he tries to breathe through the anxiety that makes itself known. He’s still trying to be logical as he grabs the phone and dials Viv’s to see if she had maybe gone into work early, went to stay with a coworker, anything.

Eris answers, to Vincent’s disappointment. “You’ve reached Viv’s Diner, what can I do for you?”

He does his best to keep his voice level. “Eris, hey- have you heard from Kora today?”

He can hear the rustle of her clothing as she shrugs. “What do I look like, her keeper? She’s not scheduled to come in ‘til later, we haven’t seen her yet.”

His voice shudders against his will when he asks, “you wouldn’t happen to know of anywhere she might go if she was upset, would you?” The Rings of Pride were huge- he had no chance of locating her without any direction, without any help. He just needed her to come home so he could explain everything, sort out the miscommunication.

“What’s the matter, Vinnie? Did Kora finally have enough and leave ya?” He can hear the smirk in her voice, the amusement that tints her tone. “I warned ya about steppin’ up for her, didn’ I?” He doesn’t stay on the line long enough to hear more than a few seconds of her cruel laughter before he slams the phone back onto the receiver, and then slams it again for good measure when he still hears her in his head. 

He still has hours to go before he has to go back to work, but Vincent can’t bring himself to sleep properly without knowing where Kora was. He tried the package hub for her courier job; he tried Viv’s again and asked to speak to Viv herself, who also hadn’t heard from Kora; the skating rink was a bust; he even called down to the station to see if maybe she had shown up while he was still working, but to no avail. No one had seen or heard from her since he had fought with her earlier the day before, and the guilt weighs him down as he leaves the house and checks the neighborhood around them for any sign of her.

He burns through an entire pack of cigarettes as he scours Imp City, fingers trembling as he lights the last one a mere thirty minutes before he’s due back at the station; not early, for once, so consumed in his frantic search for his girl that he hadn’t thought to see if anyone needed him before his actual shift. He’s sure he looks like a disaster now—a far cry from the poised, presentable anchor the city had seen just last night. He hadn’t showered, his clothes were wrinkled, and he hadn't even had a proper meal. His screen was in dire need of a wet wipe, coated with grime from the city’s pollution that made it difficult to see.

Kora has to be out there somewhere. She wouldn’t just leave him, not with how much she loved him, not with how close they were to the future he wanted for them. If something was wrong he would find her, bring her home; whatever it took.

Movement catches his eye; a bird Sinner that slinks along the shadows of the buildings like a wraith, seeming to almost blend in and evade sight as they moved. They hold a scrap of fabric clenched in their fist that they bring to their beak, the twitch of their mouth visible even from where Vincent stood. Their eyes gleam red in the darkness, a predator that’s caught the scent of their prey, and as the Sinner turns to peek an even darker alley Vincent’s first instinct is to follow them.

He wasn’t familiar enough with the darker parts of Imp City, the Pride Rings as a whole, to know all the places a person could disappear to. If they could track by scent, maybe he could give them something of Kora’s- her sheets, her clothes, anything in the apartment that her scent clung to like skin- to help find her, make sure that she wasn’t in trouble. 

The alternative was unthinkable.

“Fucking leave if you don’t like it.”

The words from their last fight ring like a death knell in his ears. He can’t push them away, can’t pretend they weren’t said- they echo in his mind like when she had told him she loved him. He had been angry. He had been frustrated, but now, in the quiet of the night with Kora’s absence weighing on him like a stone in his chest, he’s not so sure anymore.

Would she leave him? Would she give up on their future because he’d failed to be there when she needed him most? Was he consistently failing her like he had always feared he would, and the day before had been the last straw?

Vincent squeezes his eyes shut, forcing the thoughts back. No. She wouldn’t leave him. Not when everything they’d fought for, everything he had worked towards for her, was so close.

The bird vanishes into the shadows, disappearing down the alley with a speed and certainty that makes Vincent’s breath catch in his throat. He’s hardly taken a step after the Sinner when his watch beeps at him angrily, the alarm he had set earlier in his search to let him know the latest he could leave for the station if he wanted to be on time. Indecision immobilizes him.

In his place, Kora would choose him every time; it would never even be a choice for her. But she had never been in his position before, so close to the top his fingers scrabbled at the edge to pull himself up. He had proven himself the night before, sure- but that could change at a moment’s notice, and he would be right back where he started if they felt for even a moment that he wasn’t committed and willing to do whatever it took. 

Guilt sits heavy in his chest, the ring that still sits in his pocket feeling like it’s burning him as he stands there knowing that either choice was the wrong one, and turns to head towards the station.

SORRY LOL

There are 3 more chapters before we move on to part two! I promise they'll be happy- not in this fic, but eventually! ❤️

Chapter 1 📺 Chapter 2 💛 Chapter 3 📺  Chapter 4  💛 Chapter 5 📺 Chapter 6 💛Chapter 7

[carnelianwings]

Since I'm not sure if I'll ever get the chance to properly touch on this in a fic because it's more character analysis than something I can properly include in dialogue/exposition without it being very awkwardly out of place and telling not showing, I figured I'd just dump it here. It's something I think about a lot whenever I write for post-Seed Destiny Athrun in a fic, because in so many ways, this is actually something of a non-magical "Ideal (Fake) Reality" situation that Durandal very nearly succeeded in pulling off, but ultimately failed at because Durandal overplayed his hand and underestimated Athrun's loyalty to his friends Kira, who was pulling triple duty opposing Athrun because Kira himself didn't agree with what Athrun was doing, protecting Cagalli, and supporting Cagalli at a time when she was powerless.

It's a trope I very much love in magical/sci-fi settings because it says a lot about the character and the lengths they'll go to get what they want (the willingness and determination to take the longer, harder path to make the dream reality vs the instant gratification option even if it's fake), and also just gives me so much to work with when I write when it comes to character motivation/dialogue/actions.

I feel like a lot of this gets missed in all the memes that he's (somewhat deservedly) suddenly a part of after Seed Freedom, because while Seed Freedom Athrun is very self-assured and confident in his course of action, he definitely took a long hard road (with more downs than ups, in my opinion) between Seed and Seed Destiny to get there.

(Rest behind the cut because there's a reason Athrun Zala is my favorite Seed character, and not just because he's got a lovely voice - thank you Ishida-san for that - and is easy on the eyes.)

When Athrun re-enlists in ZAFT and "continues" his life again as himself, he's given a choice thanks to Durandal's string-pulling: Resume the life that was planned for him by his parents and PLANT (his "destined" life, if you will), or find his way back to the life that he's chosen for himself (with Cagalli and Orb).

If he chose his "old" life, he would've had it all - the glory of being a decorated war veteran, a post as a FAITH member (resuming the role he'd previously gotten thanks to his father), a "Lacus Clyne" for his fiance, and the honor of being the pilot of the Legend (while being something of a "legend" himself). Durandal saw to it Athrun would've seamlessly resumed that life to all external appearances, even if it would've been an absolute sham behind closed doors. Athrun might be a decorated war veteran, but that came with a lot of trauma and grief - trauma from having to fight and kill at such a young age, grief at being the one to survive when those he'd called friends die around him, plus all the unresolved emotional turmoil and grief of having never been able to properly resolve things with his father and his genocidal ideals (because Patrick Zala, too, was a man who never got over his grief at losing Lenore during the Bloody Valentine Incident, and only became the way he did because of that). He might've had a highly coveted position within FAITH, but that power would ultimately be in service to Durandal (a head of state Athrun alternates between wanting to agree with and being directly at odds against). Durandal needed more capable "Yes men" ace pilots like Shinn Asuka to spread and enforce his plans, not people capable of thinking for themselves like Athrun (at least, Athrun got there after Operation Angel Down). The "Lacus Clyne", is, of course, Meer under the best cosmetic surgery money could buy, but she is nothing like Lacus Athrun knows and cares for as a friend and whose cause he had once lent his power to (and would again at the end of the Second War).

And the Legend? It might fit Athrun in name only (in the sense that he's the "legendary pilot who helped end the first Earth-PLANT War) but the entire suit (even if it had an updated OS for the DRAGOON system) doesn't even play to Athrun's core strengths as a pilot. It's almost comedic how Durandal didn't even bother tailoring the Legend to Athrun - the Saviour is more Athrun's style both as a spiritual successor to the Aegis and weapons load out, yet it's coincidental that it would end up in Athrun's hands. There's no way Durandal could've known and planned for the Saviour to go to Athrun, but Durandal arguably had that time with the Legend. In the episode where both the Destiny and Legend are revealed, Durandal made a point of telling Shinn the Destiny was fine tuned to him, but neglects to tell Athrun much about the Legend beyond the DRAGOON system and the updated OS for it (the closest Athrun arguably ever came to a DRAGOON system was flying right past Kira and Rau's duel in front of Genesis at the end of Seed).

On the flip side of that, there's the life Athrun had chosen for himself after the first Earth-PLANT War. It's not an ideal life, not by any means - the fact he's essentially a powerless civilian with no means to reach for his ultimate goal chafes him to no end, especially when there's the ever-looming threat of Cagalli getting taken away from him due to circumstances neither of them want nor are able to deal with. Cagalli can't get out of the arranged marriage, Athrun as "Alex Dino" has no claim to power and as "Athrun Zala" would only invite larger scale international problems - even if Athrun himself has no political ties to PLANT, his family name says plenty. Athrun is patient, yes, but even his patience has a limit, and seemingly losing Cagalli to someone he doesn't respect and she doesn't love (in a reversal of Athrun's situation with Lacus and Kira) pushes him to action out of desperation. And while it puts him at odds with Kira and Cagalli (including lashing out at both of them when Cagalli finally breaks down and gives in and gets coerced into going through with the arranged marriage), it does also get him to realize that he's not the same person he was before the war - he's no longer capable of living that same life he had before, where he would fight where his country tells him because that's the fastest way to end the war. The easy (destined, if you will) option is no longer an acceptable choice for him, because it's not the one that ultimately leaves him fulfilled and truly happy with the one he loves in the end.

And it's this that ultimately brings him back to Cagalli and the (Infinite) Justice, metaphorically reclaiming his sense of justice (ha ha). He's always going to be looking for a cause to serve, and a just cause by his own terms, because he's dedicated far too much of his life serving in the military to just stop doing that and he's spent too much time around Lacus to just mindlessly follow whatever the higher ups say, anymore. So this leaves the only way forward: serve under a head of state whose ideals he can agree with, with the freedom of choice to act according to his own sense of justice, and to that end, there's only one choice for him - return to Orb and Cagalli.

[joonsytip]

Lean On || Lee Seokmin

Pairings: Seokmin x Fem!Reader

Genre: Fluff, Hurt, Comfort, Established Relationship au

Synopsis: On rough days when you have nothing but tears to offer, Seokmin always provides his shoulders to lean on and it reminds you of everything his love language entails of.

Word Count: 2.5k

Warnings: nothing heavy, toxic workplace, reader is sad, mentions of migraine, THE ENDING IS CRACK.

This is an impromptu post because this 4 month old blog has hit 500+ followers. Thanks to all whom have showed loved, interacted, have been silently supporting me, I love y'all.

Thanks to @hoeforhao for planting this idea in my brain and also for this beautiful banner (i look at it and feel better instantly) <3

Permanent taglist: @kimmych @imsjane @novalpha @hiimhappysblog @fiantomartell (sorry if I missed anyone, please lmk)

Please send an ask to get added to my permanent taglist.

Please heart, comment and reblog, it would really help to keep me going <3

[ SVT Masterlist ] [ SVT Flick - Fic Masterlist ]

The raindrops splatter against the window panes and Seokmin drawls out a restrained breath when his slumber stirs. He checks the time with teary eyes as his head still throbs, cursing himself out for not being able to pick you from work because of the killer headache which forced him to take early leave from office and return home.

He hears the doorknob making a sound and perks up in relief just because he'd be finally able to see you, feel your touch after spending hours apart because of work.

When you take slight longer than usual to cross the hallway and reach the couch where he's seated, Seokmin thinks he can't bear another moment of not seeing you. He rushes to the hallway and is about to call out your name but stills.

Your mind is anywhere and everywhere but to notice your boyfriend's presence. You know how easily he gets worried, so you take deep breaths in hopes that those tears would stop falling, hands frantically rubbing over eyes and cheeks to wipe off any hints of them. While your back still faced him, Seokmin knows you too well to catch onto your actions and even though his heart breaks he quietly goes back to take his previous position on the couch.

"Hey baby, did your headache...", it's happening again. Whenever you're upset your brain decides to stop giving out the words and you're always failing to complete the sentences or make any sense out of it for anyone. You pray that Seokmin doesn't notice, albeit of him being aware of this habit of yours.

"It's better.", Seokmin lies inspite of the way there's a rapid pounding in his head. He pats the space beside him and you're occupy it with hesitancy.

"I tried to...", you regret two things. One, meeting his gaze because your eyes are bloodshot and two, opening your mouth because the words won't come out, "I tried to..", your hands gesture inwards and Seokmin smiles.

"Work is busy, I know baby, it's not easy to leave at your will.", He responds as if he's cutting you off and pats on your head gently, "Go get changed, I'll make us something."

"No, I'm not letting you.", you protest sternly, "You're having headaches from....", you fist your hands determined to get out the word this time, "from... m-migraine", you sigh in relief and look around, "and by the way the only the dim lights are on, I can sense the intensity already. We're ordering take out."

The idea doesn't settle well with Seokmin, "Baby, it's raining outside. It's gonna be a bother to the delivery persons", his eyes go round in concern, "what if the delivery person gets into an accident just because they want to deliver in time, you know how bad the roads will be."

A smile grows on your lips, "Lee Seokmin, you got to worry about the whole world, don't you? And surely we won't be the only one ordering, there are lots of people who are, will gonna do that. But since you don't want to, let me freshen up and I'll make your favourite chicken soup."

"Okay, then I'll make your favourite mashed potato puffs.", he says and ceases every chance of protest from you by sending you into your shared bedroom.

Once you're into the bathroom, you ponder how Seokmin could make you forget about the world instantly when you're with him. But now that you're alone again, your mood sours. The hollowness returns as you shred your clothes and let the warm water wash you thorough.

Seokmin feels he could faint any moment because of the constant throbbing. It's one of those days where medicines does nothing to dull the pain. But he coaxes himself to get through because today you need him. He'd do anything to be your support, to be your anchor, to never let you go to bed upset.

He thanks heaven as he almost finishes making the puffs while waiting for you to join him. He counts sheeps, hums his favourite melodies, tries to think about something funny but nothing diverts him from the splitting headache which he feels keeps on increasing as moments pass by.

He prays he doesn't faint, he doesn't want you to worry more.

"Are you already done?", the smell floods your senses making you hungry instantly as soon as you step into the kitchen.

"Almost.", Seokmin tries to get up but tumbles on his steps and you run to hold him.

You eye him in concern as he seats on the chair. You hand him a glass of water asking, "How bad is it?"

You're met by silence and that's what you needed from him, an honest answer. Next you're running into your room to grab your scarf and purse.

"We're going to the hospital now.", you tell him, looking around for the car keys.

What Seokmin dreaded the most is happening, "Baby, it's not that bad. Plus it's raining outside, I won't let you drive, it's dangerous. I'll be okay in sometime."

You scoff as your angry gaze directs at him, "Your eyes are red, Min. You couldn't even stand properly."

Seokmin tries to open his mouth but you're cutting him off, "No more excuses. We're going to the hospital."

The temperature treatment and medicines did work some sort of magic because Seokmin feels a lot better and by the time you both are out of the hospital, the rain has also stopped.

Seokmin wants to drive, wants to tell you to take rest but with his current plight he wouldn't take the risk of doing so.

"Baby, could you please drive us to the riverside.", he asks and though you eye him questioningly, you don't say a word.

Throughout the ride his hand rests on your thigh, giving gentle caresses. It's oddly comforting you think. He hums soft melodies, adjusts the window glasses rolling them all up when he feels you shiver, rolling them down when it feels stuffy.

When you reach the riverside, Seokmin gets out urging you to stop the car at a spot and you decide to follow him after parking the car.

There's a designated bench for you two, it's your regular spot. You couldn't pinpoint why but that particular area beside the riverside had always enchanted you, during daytime it's filled with people and glee, at nighttime it's dimly lit. But today it's mostly dark maybe because of rain. That's the exact place where you met him for the first time, the memory is silly, it's beautiful and everything you'd be grateful for. Taking seat, while you wait for Seokmin your mind squares back to the incidents in the office and once again the tears start to pool in the corner of your eyes.

Those tears are now streaming down your face as you sob loudly. You don't care to hide it from your boyfriend because you know he already knows that something's off and it's a matter of time he asks you about it.

"Oh baby", you hear your boyfriend's voice and next you're being embraced by him while he sits beside you. You fist your hands on his jacket and some moments later he's loosening your grip on him just to make you look at him.

He wipes your tears and pecks on your forehead, "Wanna let it out?"

You nod like an eager child as if you were waiting for him to ask.

"I had told you about the...", It comes again, with waves of sadness, your brain not giving oult the words, "about the...", you whimper in frustration.

Seokmin knows it's something related to work so he turns the gear in his head and ask, "Project?"

You shake head.

"New team member?"

Again a no.

"Deadline?"

Still no.

He feels like ripping his hair apart and suddenly everything clicks, he thinks he knows what must have happened. With hesitancy he asks, "Promotion?"

You nod, your eyes becoming teary just at the mention, "I've been eyeing that position for a long time. My performance rating has been the best among the peer group so I was sure that I was gonna get promoted. But it was given to Jooseok, we all know he's a...", you look at him expectantly when you get stuck again.

Seokmin knowing in and outs about your workplace quickly adds, "He's a distant relative of the senior project manager."

You nod and continue, "And when I tried to talk to my manager he totally shut me out saying I shouldn't be petty about something I don't deserve in first place."

Seokmin feels unfair because he knows how diligent you are, he has seen how dedicated you are to your work. He remembers how your eyes glinted every time the topic of promotion was brought upon.

"Am I really being petty, Min?"

Vigorously shaking his head Seokmin answers, "Baby, I need you to know that you deserved it more than anyone else. I have known how many all nighters you've pulled to fill in for your incompetent teammates, to help new team members. You're so sincere and reliable, the type project leads would always want to have in their team."

Relief washes over you and you pour out more, "It's not even about the promotion, it's okay, opportunities would come more but what hurts the most is I never get credited for all the work I've put through. They always disregard everything and they're rude.", a pout settles on your lips.

"They need to be taught a lesson.", Seokmin quips because he already has ideas in his head, "Weren't you saying you had a meeting with the clients this week? When is that scheduled?"

"This Thursday.", you say unsuspectingly.

Seokmin grins big when he says, "When you go home you're gonna apply emergency leave for the remaining week. Let's see how things roll without you."

Your eyes go wide in shock, "I can't do that! Plus my manager won't approve it."

"They're called emergency leaves for a reason. And what's your manager gonna do about it? The most he can do is run his filthy mouth.", Seokmin reasons and you're laughing at how he's making questionable faces whenever your manager comes up in the conversation.

"Next you're gonna start applying for new jobs. Your workplace is toxic and sorry if I sound rude or demanding or controlling but I won't let you work somewhere where it costs you your mental health. You deserve to be appreciated for the efforts you're putting through, you deserve a better working environment."

You know what your boyfriend's suggesting is actually a real deal, not that you haven't pondered over this before. Having endured the dirty politics of the office for long actually fuels up in making up your mind.

"I think I'm gonna start applying for jobs.", you acknowledge and Seokmin hugs you in delight. When he does so you wonder where you'd belong if it's not to him.

"You don't even have to work through the notice period, you know I can provide for both of us unless you get another job.", he says and pinches the bridge of your nose, "But I also know your conscience won't allow you to do so, you won't leave that abruptly."

"Thanks Min. What would I do without you?",you whisper giving him a knowing smile. He pecks your lips before asking to wait as he runs off to somewhere.

Some moments later the area suddenly lights dimly in various colours making your eyes wonder in search of not anything in particular. Then falls a spotlight on the empty space to your front. You watch as your boyfriend walks in taking place into the circle of the light holding a what you assume to be a water bottle along with that a gas balloon, the thread tied on his wrist.

He looks at you, when your gazes meet his smiles ear to ear which turns out to be contagious because you're smiling wide too.

The characteristic goofy smile that he gives you tugs on your heart and when he's holding the bottle as a makeshift mic you're already laughing out loud.

"Silly", you call him out.

He points at you before he starts to sing.

And when he starts to sing, your eyes almost fall off the sockets because he's singing what you had never anticipated.

"Dogs goes woof, Cat goes meow...", he starts to sing so soulfully that if you didn't know the lyrics and the song you'd mistake it for some melody, "Bird goes tweet and mouse goes squeek…"

He's jumping around, hoping from one place to another, hitting notes effortlessly with such parodical expressions that you're sliding down the bench, holding your cheeks that are aching from all the laughing.

And when he goes quiet all of sudden, you squint eyes at him. He closes up to you and sings again, "But there's one sound, that no one knows......."

He hold the bottle to your mouth, urging you to continue and you're choking and bubbling out giggles when you manage to say, "What does the fox say?"

You are wrong to think this couldn't get funnier, your boyfriend couldn't get funnier. Because he's know holding the balloon and untying the thread. Next he's inhaling the gas which you're sure now that it's helium.

And that's it, that's what made you goner.

With his husky voice turning shrillest he winks at you and aggressively does the did, sings the catch part of the song.

"Ring-ding-ding-ding-dingeringeding!Gering-ding-ding-ding-dingeringeding!"

You're rolling on the ground, kicking legs in the air, clutching your stomach in case it bursts open from excessive laughing.

"M-Min, please stop or I'll really combust.", your strained voice is pleading, "This is ridiculous, what are you?"

Seokmin gets the scare of his life as he takes the literal meaning of your words and stops instantly. And you regret taking a look at his expression because it's so funny that you're laying down again just to laugh.

"Are you done?", Seokmin tugs on your sleeves, "This wasn't supposed to be that funny. Why are still laughing? Do I look funny?"

You know he's sulking and teasing simultaneously so you're grabbing his face and pulling him down so that you could kiss him and gleefully he obliges.

"Idiot", you mumble against his lips once they part, "You're inhaling Helium and doing all sorts of hyping with this massive headache. It's gonna be worse."

"Anything to make you feel better.", he pecks your lips once again and says, "I'm so proud of you, Y/N. Never doubt your worth. I love you."

"And you're the best thing that happened to me. You should also be knowing how your presence itself can heal anyone around you. Love you too baby, thanks for being mine, for being with me.", You confess, honestly, feeling his face, asserting assurance.

He gets up and helps you to do so, "We'll pick up dinner from that takeaway truck on our way home."

"Fine, since it's late. I'll make you chicken soup tomorrow.", You say, "Let's go, I need to apply for leave and prepare the seperation papers as well."

"Sounds like a plan, but first let's return the bottle to aunt, her stall is still open. She must be waiting for us and also, gotta tell her to switch off the lights."

Aunt has been integral part of your journey with Seokmin. She runs a stall by the riverside and you had met her through Seokmin, the old woman is quirky, funny and an absolute lovebug. She loves you both as her own and you both reciprocate the same.

As Seokmin skips all the way ahead of you, calling your name to show random things he sees on the ground, your heart swells in your chest. You thank heavens for letting you have Seokmin to lean on.

→ Do not copy, re-post, translate, or share any of my works on other platforms! All stories are copyrighted, joonsytip. ©️

[esthersarahhh]

characters; Jean Kirstein x gn!reader

summary; reader has a crush on Jean but he only seems to have eye for a certain black haired girl.

word count; 1k (1008)

content warning; no happy ending?, takes place in the early days of the 104 cadet corps, slight marco x reader?? (if you squint)

notes; this is my first time writing a post on my phone this feels very weird, if you have any tips or anything i can improve let me know! as well as requests, if u have a request please ask! (i also have a annie x reader fic on my mind that i’ll put into words soon enough so)

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You were eating when Jean first met Mikasa. As you were sitting with Marco and Jean, there was a conversation going on by the table next to us. Apperently it's that guy that says he wants to kill all the titans, and quite a few people have gathered around to listen to him. You don't pay any attention, you have other things on your mind.

Your friend, Jean, you've had a crush on him since the day you joined, and luckily the two of you became fast friends along with Marco. But friends wasnt enough. You wanted to hold his hand as well as hold his face while-

Jean stood up so you looked what was happening. He was talking to Eren, and a few seconds later they shook hands, apologizing to each other for something. As Eren left, a beautiful black haired girl followed him. Your face dropped when you saw Jean's expression when he saw her. His eyes followed her with every step she took, something he never did when it came to you.

'' Hey there! '' he said to her. As she turned around you could see the visable blush on his face. '' Uh it's just that i've never seen you around so.. '' She didn't say anything back.

'' S-sorry.. Your black hair is really gorgeous. ''

'' Thanks. '' She simply says and walks away.

Jean stands shook a minute and then runs out the door. You couldn't bear to see anymore so you focused back on your food. From the corner of your eye you could see Marco giving you a sympathetic look, but you knew that if you looked up to face him, he would see your tears and you couldn't afford to look weak.

_

That was 2 months ago. Even after that interaction, and the countless times Jean has talked about Mikasa to you, your crush on him never faltered.

Your relationship with Marco got stronger though, seeing as you could talk to him about Jean. You could talk to Marco whenever and he gave really good advice too.

But today you felt good. You had had a few quite romantic interactions with Jean in these past few days, so you decided it might've been time to confess. And seeing as titans are still a threat, better late than never right? You decided to talk to him after lunch, without everyone around. You told Marco your plan to confess beforehand, just so he'd know and he was supportive and hoping the best.

When everyone started packing up and leaving the lunch room, you tapped Jean on his shoulder.

'' Hey, can i talk to you? Alone? '' you said, your heart beating faster with each word. Jean didn't seem as happy as you though. He didn't even look you in the eye. He looked behind you, as if he was looking for someone else.

'' Mhmm '' He hummed, still not looking at you. You're not even sure if he heard what you said. You sat back down and started to think of the exact words you were going to say. Soon the lunch room was empty exept for you and Jean.

'' So..why i wanted to talk to you was- '' you started but were cut off by Jean himself.

'' Can you wrap it up..please? I need to find Mikasa to ask her something. '' His eyes seemed to lit up and his cheeks turned the slighest bit red when he mentioned Mikasa. You felt a deep pit in your stomach. You had thought his crush on her had faded because she never showed any interest towards him.

You opened your mouth to answer but found yourself with a lump in your throat, unable to talk. The tears started welling up in your eyes and you couldn't bear it any longer. You stood up and left without a word, leaving Jean alone. You walked all the way to the boy dorms where Marco lived. You knocked and awaited an answer. As soon as the door opened you walked right in with your head down, to Marco's bed.

Marco was sitting in his bed, reading something, but stopped as soon as he saw you. He scooted over, making place for you to sit. As you sat down you broke down in sobs, and he put his arm around you. You leant into his chest and let it all out. You couldn't care less if all of the boys in this dorm were looking at you right now, which they probably were.

After you calmed down a bit, you told Marco what'd happened. He said Jean was a fool for not listening, wether he liked you back or not it was straight out rude to ignore you like that. You and him stayed in each others arms for a while longer until you spoke up.

'' I should probably go back to my dorm now.. '' you said, tho you didn't want to leave. It was nice being with Marco, he made you feel safe. '' You could stay here if you'd like. If Commandant Shadis found you outside at this hour there is no telling what he'll punish you with. ''

'' Are you sure? I don't want the others to think anything weird. '' You said. Sure you wanted to stay here but what if the other guys would start rumors?

'' They wont say anything. Now come on. '' He made place for you on the bed. Luckily the bed was big enough for two people, so you had enough space. You laid down next to him, but facing the wall. You doubt you'll get much sleep considering you still had many tears left to let out, and the fact that you have to face Jean sooner or later didn't make your thoughts any lighter. You felt a hand on your shoulder. '' Y/n, stop thinking about him and close your eyes. ''

You did as Marco said, and moments later you fell asleep.

[brisquad-unit-4402]

for your writers truth and dare (lmao get asked)

🥑🐇 [juice box emoji] (bc my phone doesnt support it wtf)

from this ask meme!

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

🥑 ⇢ you accidentally killed somebody, which mutual(s) do you text for help?

ack and gasp i would NEVER!! without vsf supervision of course.

i also got no idea if some of these people are my mutuals or not because i follow from my main blog but i wanna interact anyways <3

@mystaposts you're a sweetheart but i know you've shed blood at one point or another and i need that on my side. you take the legs i'll take the arms. we're slinging this bitch into an incinerator

@thechaoticplayer you give energy like you would tell me about a tv show you watched recently where they killed a guy using this specific method and how to recreate it to dispose of the body, and then i would tell you that bc it's on tv we can't copy it entirely, but we do get inspired along the way and do our own thing with the method in mind. what i'm trying to say is that you would unironically say "did you know that ricin is toxic in small amounts and easy to overlook during an autopsy? i saw it on breaking bad"

@vezalust maybe it's the y2k robot dog banner speaking but i feel like you have experience with this sort of thing? i think you would suggest a place to hide a body and then immediately say to forget it because you've already hidden one there

@celestiaras there's two ways this could go. either you're a stone cold killer baddie that ends up being the mvp, orrrrrrrr you get queasy at the sight of mysta and i hauling the body. either way every good plan needs a freeloader and i think the princess herself would provide excellent commentary without getting her hands too dirty

.　 . • ☆ . ° .• °:. *₊ ° . ☆

🐇 ⇢ do you prefer writing original characters, reader inserts, or a mix of both? 

reader inserts!

but i feel like sometimes reader inserts are original characters. i really love incorporating backstories, personality, etc into them because even though they’re blank slates, you can pretend that you’re a different personality than your own whenever you reader a reader insert. it’s almost necessary for me to make them distinct in my longer fics.

in a previous fandom i ended up writing a [character] x reader fic on request for a soft and shy reader. i ended up writing 9k-ish words on this reader that looks scary because they’re huge compared to other people, but they had an adorable hobby along with being a gentle giant. i ended up giving that reader a proper name, design, and never shared my oc outside of my friend group but i love them dearly even if i’m not so active in that fandom anymore…!

.　 . • ☆ . ° .• °:. *₊ ° . ☆

🧃 ⇢ share some personal lore you never posted about before

ah. well. i don't really have any! i'm just a unit i'm just a guy

.　 . • ☆ . ° .• °:. *₊ ° . ☆

✧. ┊ ask meme ✧. ┊ masterpost ✧. ┊ kofi

[anotherbluesunday]

Fic Update--In Technicolor, Ch.9: The Right Side of my Neck (Cheryl)

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Dark eyes to match his dark hair. Dimples in his full cheeks and a small round nose that mirrored his twins. A voice that was just deep enough to give comfort but light enough in melody that it spanned a multitude of octaves. A cheeky grin. A knowing pop of his brow. The glint in the pools of deep onyx that sat unflinching behind his glasses–how they’d focus on me as I worked out the problems Lee couldn’t quite wrap his head around so he handed them off to me. How even while sitting he was still taller than me and the way he found it so funny whenever he used me as a chin rest.

Conventional but very much not.

“Mañana,” Lee smiled wide and lazy, lit up in shades of gold and warm bronze by the sunshine that washed out the bed. “Dormir bien?”

My eyes danced from his to the little gold Guadalupe tucked into the hollow of his throat then up to his lips as they curled into a bigger grin. One that began to show his nearly perfect teeth that added a strange charm to his smirks. Gold really was his color. Gold and green. And blue.

Catching myself staring when Lee shifted somewhat uncomfortably beneath the weight of my blatant gawking, I looked down. Felt the knot in my throat form again when he awkwardly apologized. Retracted his arm from where it had been sitting happily across my hips–just above my thighs and the band of the boxers he’d lent me for sleeping shorts. This confusing concoction of embarrassment that blended with the urge to keep his arm around me a little while longer. The aggravation at him moving it without my permission. The alarms that went off in screaming unison as I thought it. I knew what my irrational mind wanted to do. What it was trying to force. But I stomped it out. Told her to stop because another step closer to that button was another step closer to self-destruction because giving in meant losing my only friend. The only person who saw me. And I knew better now than to allow myself to trauma bond and build up unrealistic romantic delusions in my head.

Flicking his nose once my brain had performed a swift reboot, I raised a brow at him. “We’re going to be late for class.”

Swatting my hand away as it moved to pinch at him, Lee wiggled back. “H-Hey, stop it. We won’t be late, ‘kay. Bertie’s riding with Wynn so I’ve got the truck.”

“Uh, I still have to get my car from FP’s.”

“Or you could just leave it and hangout with us after school.”

“It’s homecoming tonight, Lee.”

“Okay, and?” he asked, rolling onto his stomach–face relaxed on the pillows bunched up on his folded arms with his questioning gaze locked on me.

“Jason’s playing. I may not be in cheer anymore but I still want to support him. It’s also our last homecoming game so it’s important.”

“Then go to the game and then hangout.”

Letting him think that through for a moment, I rolled my eyes when Lee gave me a silent dumb ‘what?’ in return. “I still wouldn’t have my car. So you’d have to wait for me. Or I could just take an Uber to Ocean Park–”

“You’re not taking an Uber that late.”

“Then you’d have to wait for me because I’m going to the game.”

“Fine,” he said without thinking through what exactly he was agreeing to. And it showed when his brain caught up with his mouth and the dread settled in with minute changes in his eyes and defiant smile. But something else followed. Something that brought the sureness back. “Do people still paint half their faces at football games and go shirtless?”

“Lee, no.”

“If we’re going, I’m making a scene of it.”

“Pugsley Addams, no.”

“Oh-ho yes, Cheryl Blossom. My counselor said the last time we talked I should try having more school spirit.” Laughing in a tickled jovial sort of way despite my groaning and protest, he rotated onto his back. Looked up at me just as I looked up at the ceiling with an exaggerated huff. Poking my chin enough times to get my attention, Lee didn’t drop the smile. “I won’t embarrass you, much. I promise.”

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Spared when Lee steered his father’s attention back to him, I looked down at my phone. Felt my throat clamp shut at the message dad had sent me. Another warning. A threat daring me that if I stayed out another night without his permission I’d be grounded. A word that was code for worse because he knew better than to say what he actually meant in written format. Texting Jason to see if he could fill me in on how pissed father was–which number he was at on our sliding scale–I recoiled at his terse response of “I don’t know Cher.” Today wasn’t a grade-A day for either of us. Wouldn’t be for our friends either. For Betty, especially, but just as much Jason. But I wasn’t trying to antagonize him or make today about myself. I just wanted a heads up on what I would be returning home to. But I had stepped on another landmine, it seemed, without trying. A bomb that I’d have to diffuse when I got back tonight after the game or brace myself for impact when father blew up. It could only be one or the other, never in between. And I would rest-assuredly be handling this on my own. A thought that made me wither inside.

“You good?” Lee whispered low into my ear, his voice a comforting sound to ease my worries. “Cher…?”

I didn’t want to go. Didn’t want to leave this place of calm and kindness. A bubble of safety where I could rest my weary head and battered bones without jumping back ready to fight at the slightest sound. I felt my cheek ache. The phantom fractures healed in my arm itch beneath my skin. How my jaw tensed and my eyes welled with dread. I didn’t want to go back. Lee had given me the option of staying longer. One that still, technically, stood. But it wasn’t something that was appropriate to bring up now and I had already told him I couldn’t stay another night. Couldn’t but wanted to so badly.

Looking up as Bertie and Wednesday and Gomez and his brother Fester got up in turn to leave, I watched them as if I weren’t inside my own skin. Passively watched in a disassociated daze as the dawning realization of what my evening would end with sank in. Would I be spitting blood into the sink like last time? How fast would the welts on my skin fade away? Half a year ago father had pulled out enough of my hair in one spot I had to wear it up just to effectively cover up the patch.

Rationing my breaths while working to keep control of myself long enough that no one would notice, I was thankful when Mrs. Addams gently placed a hand on my shoulder and sat me back down. Was certain my legs would have given out had I taken another step. Turning my gaze up to her–my eyes more pleading and hopeful than I had meant for them to be–I watched her closely. Observed as she told her two other children to take her car for the day; something that had both Wednesday and Bertie bug-eyed. But with one quick glance to me, Lee’s twin knew. Capitalized on that brain they both shared the same way Jason and I did, or so I hoped we still did.

“Angelito, darling,” she said to her eldest as Lee looked from me to her, “Could you please get my cell from the kitchen? I need to make a call to your school to inform the dean that you’ll be absent for the day as well as Cher.”

“Right.”

Without question or hesitation, he got up. Let go of my hand that he had been holding without my even knowing until the warmth of his palm had vanished. Eyes still fixed to the woman who was, as her children said, a mother to all, I mouthed a silent “thank you” to her when she looked down. Felt myself wishing I could cry as she told me everything would be fine while dotingly stroking her hand down the back of my head. How could they be so kind? How could they be so welcoming? Non-judgemental when I knew they knew about how I had treated Lee? Wasn’t it a mother’s instinct to protect her sons more intensely than her daughters?

Saying something to her son that I couldn’t understand–something that wasn’t English or Spanish–Morticia patted my cheek softly before Lee helped me up, us both leaving the dining room so that she could make her call. Said it was a good thing I hadn’t spent extra time on my makeup that morning since we were staying put for the day. I didn’t realize I hadn’t done my makeup yet until he mentioned it which made me laugh. Something that seemed to confuse Lee but didn’t bother having it explained because he smiled too. Chuckled when I made a turn toward the doors that led outside into the backyard.

Exiting out onto the minimally sheltered porch, I walked out a little further. Fell back onto the hammock bed with a padded body and plush pillows to break my fall. Laughing with some tears of relief breaking free, I swung between joy and the jitter that came from my anxious release. Sniffled and couldn’t stop even as Lee rolled over from where he had plopped down and hugged me tight. Eyes closed as he rubbed circles into my back cooing “shh, you’re okay,” I made myself believe in his words. Made myself trust him and his mother because my paranoid mind whispered in my ear that this was all a hoax. That Mrs. Addams was calling my father to tell him where I was and to come get me. But she would not do such a thing. I didn’t have much to go off of since I had only met her the night before. But I knew selling people down the river was not something that was in her nature. None of her children were like that. Her husband wasn’t either. None of them were so I could trust them when they gave their word.

I could trust this peace. This safety.

Focusing on a new sound filling the space around us, I could hear Pugsley humming. Felt the vibrations in his chest as they traveled up to his throat that moved against the minimal press of my forehead. Heard him as he murmured the words to “Sparks” which was a Coldplay favorite we both shared. Heard the lyrics isolate themselves in my mind as he sang “But I promise you this. I’ll always look out for you.” Sang back to him “And I saw sparks” which made his jaw move downward slightly when he smiled. He told me I was skipping the best parts. I told him the whole song was the best part. Looking down at me with an arched brow, he bit at my nose. Said it was good to have me arguing with him again.

Ironic, I found it, that the part of me that used to annoy him most was now Lee’s barometer for telling whether or not I was okay in the head.

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[demon-country]

You know I haven't seen anyone address the fact that Stolas hasn't told Blitz or anyone that Stella hired Striker. And it make me wonder is it because he doesn't want to worry anyone or does he think no one will care? Honestly either way is heartbreaking.

You're right, I haven't seen any meta about it either, although truthfully I'm pretty new to the fandom so I might've just missed any discussions about it when the episode came out. I've seen it explored a few times in fics though!

As for my own thoughts on it, I think there's a good chance it might be because he thinks no one will care. Although, I'm positive that he hasn't told Octavia about it because he doesn't want to ruin whatever relationship she has with her mother. He wants her to have a family, and to him that has always meant sheltering her from all of his abuse and likely his depression too.

As for everyone else, well his problem is probably two-fold. For one thing, Stolas is used to people either ignoring or laughing at the way Stella treats him, as shown in The Circus when no one seemed bothered by her publicly humiliating him. He, like many abuse survivors and male survivors in particular, is probably deeply ashamed of his abuse. You'll notice that he doesn't seem to have told anyone about that either. This is an extension of her abuse, and he might not know how to talk about something he's kept hidden for so long, even though it's now a direct threat to his life. Or perhaps he thinks that because she called it off, it means she's no longer interested in killing him and therefore it doesn't matter.

For another thing, well, like I've said before, Stolas has been braced for Blitz's rejection for quite some time. This likely solidified when Blitz both acted very nonchalant on the phone during his kidnapping and never came to see him in the hospital. In fact, I think the implication was that no one visited him in the hospital, save maybe Octavia. He has no friends, likely no family besides Octavia who cares about him, no support system at all, and the man he reached out to for help doesn't seem interested in personally helping or even interacting with him (we as an audience know Blitz's very good reasons for his avoidance, but unfortunately Stolas does not). Stolas might not think Blitz would actually care about who ordered the hit, especially since it was called off and isn't likely to be an issue anymore.

And notice how Stolas starts his call with Blitz with an apology. I think that now that Stolas has 'realized' that Blitz has been completely unhappy with their deal and might not want him back (both are largely untrue, but Blitz was so good at masking it that Stolas now believes the lies), he has stopped all of his flirtation entirely and let his very low self-esteem win. When you're depressed, it's very common to think that you're being a burden to those around you, and that's amplified when you've been abused and told you're a burden. So you feel the need to apologize whenever you ask for help or impose upon someone's time, and when you say "I'm sorry for calling again at a bad time," there's often an unspoken "I'm sorry for burdening you with my problems and presence, I'm sorry to have to ask this of you," tacked onto it.

So yeah, while we know that Blitz cares about him so fucking much and would absolutely want to kill Stella for daring to go after Stolas, Stolas... doesn't. And after Apology Tour, he's convinced that Blitz gives exactly zero shits about him or what happens to him.

This is likely something that no one is going to know about until the choice is taken out of his hands and forcibly exposed. He won't tell Octavia, because he doesn't want to worry her or show her the dark truth of his and Stella's relationship. He won't tell anyone else, because he doesn't think they'll care.

It is heartbreaking, and I can't wait for the truth to come out. Thank you for the ask, I love talking about meta!

[cynthia39100]

@themerlinlibrary August Writing Challenge

Prompt 3: Royalty

Merlin & Arthur

Arthur x Gwen (They break up at the beginning.)

AO3 link

(A little Modern Royalty AU fic. I had little knowledge and imagination of royalty so bear with me... and I swear I'm not purposefully using Gwen and Arthur's broken relationship as an opening every time. )

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Arthur should have seen this coming. 

He was in his bedroom in Windsor, holding a sobbing Gwen. She was saying how she loved him and how hard she’d tried and that she couldn’t do it anymore. 

“ I’m not royalty, Arthur. I thought I could learn to become one, but I will never be. You deserved a better wife who can support you through all odds. People… ” She trailed off, but Arthur knew what she didn’t say. People deserved a proper queen. They always did. Arthur was born to serve the people after all. 

Arthur comforted her with random words while feeling hollow and unreal. Everything was like a scene in the movie. He was just an observer. 

His whole life was like it, wasn’t it? There were always rules, traditions and scripts to follow. Every word, every action was properly designed and calculated by a group of “writers”. Because there is always someone watching. Because it’s his duty to be the perfect Prince people expected. 

It’s better now, of course. Rules became more flexible, and some old traditions no longer applied. He could date a peasant girl and even consider marrying her, as long as she adapted to the culture and duties of a royal family. 

He didn’t realise that was the most difficult part. 

Whenever Gwen stood by him, He felt that he finally had a little freedom and control in his life. Gwen must have felt the contrary. Arthur could only offer her wealth and title, neither was what Gwen needed in life. 

And so he let go of Gwen, told her it was alright, and sent for staff outside the room to escort her out. Arthur didn’t bother to chase out Merlin who silently sneaked in. He just lay on his bed, determined not to react to any of Merlin’s comforting words. Surprisingly, Merlin didn’t do his usual cheering or rambling to distract him, only standing beside the door like a security guard. 

Arthur supposed Merlin still knew when to leave him alone. Or he for once just didn’t know what to say. 

“ Don’t stand there like an idiot. Don’t you have more productive things to do? Writing my break-up announcement for one.” Arthur finally spoke up, couldn’t tolerate the silence. 

“ I already asked George to do it.” 

Another silent moment passed. Merlin was still standing beside the door, and Arthur was still lying on the bed. 

“ Am I wrong not to listen to Father and marry Elena?” 

“ It’s 21 century. Even the prince is allowed to choose his partner.” 

“ Gwen backed off. I’ve refused all the legitimate noblewomen in the country. What if I can’t find another one? What about the succession?” 

“ I’m sure Morgana will be happy to succeed. Actually, it should be Mordred. Have you met him recently? He has grown quite a lot.” 

“ And I’m just going to become this lonely old king?”

“ Well… on the bright side, you still got me.”  

Arthur finally surged up from the bed, looked at Merlin incredulously. 

“ Is that supposed to cheer me up?” 

“ Thought it might.” Merlin shrugged unapologetically while showing his iconic goofy smile. 

“ You really are an idiot,” Arthur said exasperatedly, but he turned to cover the smile he couldn’t quite suppress. 

Merlin seemed to sense the smile anyway. His voice became lighter and more cheerful. 

“ Since Your Highness feels better now, your father wants to meet you whenever you are ready. Do you want me to notify His Majesty?” 

Arthur sighed and got off the bed. He didn’t want to face his father, but the sooner it was done, the better. 

Merlin opened the door and was about to leave, but Arthur called him back. 

“ Aren’t you coming with me?” 

Merlin winced. “ The King is horrifying.” 

“ And you’re going to leave me alone? Right after you swore to serve me forever?”

“ I did not!” 

“ Yes, you did. Anyway, It’s your prince’s order.” 

Merlin mumbled some inaudible insults under his breath, and Arthur smiled again. It seemed that whether he could find a new love or not, he would always have his best friend hanging around. It made the future just a little less horrifying.

[razzlerdazzler]

Can I request a poly x reader fic with flint and Duke from gi Joe renegades? Maybe headcanons of what it would be like to date them both if that’s easier. Thanks in advance

Hello, sorry it took so long, this is my first time writing for a poly relationship so I hope you like it :)

Duke and Flint (Poly) Relationship Headcanons

They both like PDA

Whenever it's a lazy peaceful day and nobody has work, they both love to just lay in bed for a little while longer and cuddle

Whenever somebody is hitting on one of you guys they will both have different ways of handling the situation

Duke is more upfront about it if somebody is hitting on either you or Flint

Duke will casually walk up to whoever the person is talking to and he will wrap his arms around them and will kiss their neck while making eye contact with the person and will go "is this person bothering you babe?"

Meanwhile Flint is more subtle if somebody is hitting on you or Duke

He'll keep an eye on you and will see if you're getting uncomfortable or if you're just having a conversation with the person

He'll walk up to whoever the person is talking to and will make subtle hints about their relationship

However if the person isn't getting the hints or is ignoring them, he will say straight out that they are flirting with his partner and then he will grab yours or Duke's hand and will walk away from the person

If somebody is flirting with you while they're both there then they will usually combine their tactics

If anybody hurts you or makes you cry then that person better start running because they'll have two very angry Joe's coming right after them

They're both super protective over you, considering how dangerous their jobs are they both worry about COBRA finding out about you

They both teach you self-defense

Duke is usually less hard on you while teaching you self-defense

Flint however is a little more tough on you about it, but he tells you it's because he worries and he wants to make sure that you can protect yourself

However, after the sessions they both help take care of you, especially if you're bruised or sore

They'll tell you how proud they are of you and how good you did while they take care of you

Whenever on of them (sometimes both of them) is about to go on a mission, you all make sure to spend a lot of time together before they leave

Whenever one of them is on a mission, they always try their hardest to facetime you guys whenever they have the chance

Duke's parents love you guys and are very supportive of your all's relationship

They invite you to their house every Thanksgiving and Christmas and love to talk to you about Duke's childhood and even show you and Flint his baby pictures, much to Duke's embarrassment

Duke and Flint love to tease each other about their childhood and about their football days

They introduce you to Scarlett, Roadblock, Lady Jaye, Tunnel Rat, and Snake Eyes

Whenever you guys go to sleep you all take turns being in the middle

Whenever any of you have a nightmare (considering their professions it most likely happens every once in a while) the other two will comfort them and will make sure that they know that they are loved and safe

You all love each other very much and are so happy to be in a relationship with the two people you love the most

[synthetickitsune]

hi! I am sauuurr in love with your writing and you're even a fan of onewe!! Onewe fics are very rare to find so I was wondering if I could please request for love languages with them ♡ thank yewww

Onewe are the loves of my life to be honest ♡ Every request for them makes me unreasonably happy haha 🥹

Love languages with Onewe ♡

ˏˋ°•*⁀➷ Yonghoon: physical touch

For someone who never liked math much, since you’ve begun dating Yonghoon you keep counting in your head. Counting down until he runs up to you after coming home or after you arrive at his studio, counting the times his hand brushes against yours while you walk down the street, counting how long he can go without touching you in any way. Counting up to ten before you get up so he can have a precious moment longer of holding you in the morning. You see the way it’s an instinct for him, to touch the people dear to him. Not only you, even though it’s especially prominent in his behavior towards you. Given the option, he’ll always lean into you when he laughs. You’ll be the first one he taps to show you whatever caught his attention. Without thinking, he laces your fingers together when he wants you to follow him. It’s all so natural that it sometimes takes your breath away.

It works the other way around too. You see how brightly Yonghoon smiles when you initiate affection. To hug and hold him for a while is the easiest way to comfort him when he’s upset. Tension leaves his body in his arms until he sags against you whether you can hold him up or not. You live for the cute, scared yelps of his when you sneak behind him and hug him, and you can only smile and give in when he pouts and whines, and the only way to shut him up is with kisses. He needs your love and suffers greatly when you’re apart. No matter how reassuring words are, he can only breathe when he can feel your body against his. 

ˏˋ°•*⁀➷ Harin: acts of service

Whenever you need it, help’s never too far away. It’s like Harin can sense when you’re stuck, busy, distressed, or just could use his presence by your side. Nothing is ever an issue. He’s always right there to help or support you in any way he can. You need help fixing something around the house? He’s got it - and he will even teach you if you promise you won’t stop relying on him. You’re feeling like trying out a new recipe but it’s complicated and needs a lot of preparation? He’s already at your house with the ingredients and asking for instructions. He will learn new things for you. He will learn them with you. Anything to make you happy, because your happiness is his. He always reassures you he doesn’t mind at all - because he doesn’t. He’s glad he can help you and he loves seeing how much you trust and appreciate him. It makes him feel manly if he can lift some burden off your shoulders and it gives him a nice ego boost whenever you’re left in awe because he solved a problem that was overwhelming for you.

When the tables are turned, he’s shy. He’s deeply appreciative of when you help and take care of him, even if he can’t find the right words to tell you. Harin hopes the gentle touches and his devotion to you tell you enough. (They do.) Slowly he learns it’s okay to ask for help too, and he must admit that something about how well you work together makes him fall deeper and deeper for you. The other may joke that you’re obsessed with each other - but so what? You’re each other’s priority and you will work to keep it that way for the rest of your lives.

ˏˋ°•*⁀➷ Kanghyun: quality time

It’s so important to Hyungu that you’re both comfortable in each other’s company. Not only as far as trust is concerned, although it is a given he wants you to be able to open up to him about anything just as he tries to be completely open with you too, but also that it helps you relax and doesn’t drain you even more. He loves that your relationship feels like the definition of comfort. Just spending time with you is so healing and you understand that as an introvert he needs a lot of time alone just to recharge. However, he keeps seeking out your company. It makes him satisfied on a level that can’t be described. Because you’re precious. Because he can relax with you. Because he loves you and loves spending time with you. Be it talking, reading together, watching shows together, it’s hard to describe the feeling in other terms than being enveloped by warmth and safety. He can only hope you feel the same.

Of course you do. He’s your home. And he’s so obviously in love with you that it’s hard not to give in to the cuteness aggression. When you suggest spending time together, it’s like he’s ready to drop everything just to make it happen. Hyungu thrives when you’re with him, whatever it is that you’re doing. He’d be happy even just sitting in silence with you, daydreaming. Time, he’s come to realize, is the one most precious thing and so he chooses to spend it with you and nothing could make his heart flutter more than you choosing him above everyone else, above all the things you could do on your own. He wants to always be the person you choose.

ˏˋ°•*⁀➷ Dongmyeong: words of affirmation

He’s your cheerleader. Praises and compliments spill from his lips effortlessly like there’s always something nice to say. Dongmyeong doesn’t even realize how much his words affect you, it’s simply natural to him to tell you how he honestly feels. And that’s the thing - usually you’d think the person was just saying that to be polite or out of obligation, but with your boyfriend, you see that he doesn’t even need to think about it. He tells you you’re beautiful because you are, he compliments your skill because you truly did well. If you mess up, he acknowledges it but not without praising you for the effort you put in. Being supportive of you is like breathing to him. And he’s a warrior - he will battle your insecurities right alongside you. All you need to do is give him a reason to worry, and it could be anything, and he’s clinging to you and reminding you that he loves you and why he loves you.

Dongmyeong loves so hard because he, too, requires a lot of love. Even sun is sometimes hidden behind clouds. He needs your support too and you return all his love in full. You don’t mind lying on his chest, whispering reassurances against his skin while he holds you close like you’re his lifeline. He never needs to wait for you to compliment him on his outfit, his hair or for his hard work. He feels appreciated. His days are brighter because of you, each and every confession and kind word from your lips he treasures. He relies on you on the days his confidence is running low, and he’s more than ready to take the role of a knight in shiny armor from you on the days you’re the one doubting yourself.

ˏˋ°•*⁀➷ Giuk: gift giving

He’s not spoiling you as most would imagine it, but it is spoiling to you. Giuk doesn’t give you extravagant, expensive gifts, nor does he keep showering you with them. But each item he gives you is special. It’s the one toy from the toy capsule machine that you wanted but gave up on it because you didn’t like the others. (He gifts the rest of his winning to his members and the children in their families.) It’s the matching figure to the one in his studio that you keep admiring any time you come over. It’s giving you random merch of the media and content you love most because he knows they bring you comfort. And it’s borrowing you his clothes and accessories for the same reason. He doesn’t complain when his hoodie never makes it back home. Everything he gets you has so much thought behind it that you treasure every little token of his love. He loves to see your bashful smile, and he loves to see each of the gifts taken good care of. It’s like you’re taking care of his heart too.

So it’s not surprising that Giuk cherishes anything that you give him too. It brings him comfort - all of it. Having the items close, seeing them and remembering you, and when he needs to clean around the room, they motivate him to finish the task. Sometimes he thinks you see it as a competition. It feels like you’re reading his mind and his stomach is full of butterflies, because he never expects you’d remember what he mentions in passing, and yet you surprise him every single time. It makes his resolve stronger. One day he will give you a ring, and you will be the one left breathless and flustered. At least he hopes so.

[unrelaxing]

i'm 29 next friday, and i'm thinking of the phrase "and what do you have to show for it?" in regards to my own life.

i've been here 29 years, and what do i have to show for it? i've been medicated for nearly ten years, went to therapy for even longer, and live pretty much paycheck to paycheck. i have several mild but chronic conditions that have impacted my life. it sounds ... less than ideal, when you put it that way.

on the other hand, despite a nuclear family of mental illnesses, i am genuinely content and happy a lot of the time — probably because of the above mentioned therapy and medications. i could never afford a house or a car, but i can buy books and candles and live in a space i'm comfortable in and have made my own. i luckily live in a beautifully multicultural city with hundreds of cheap eats for broke foodies.

i live with someone who makes me believe in soulmates, and we can have the time of our lives in grocery stores or stuck in traffic or even when we're having to evacuate due to potential wildfire.

i have a dog i love more than life who i can hug whenever i want, and i come across a book or fic that rocks my world at least once a week.

i'm good at cooking. i'm good at cleaning. i'm good enough at writing. i'm good at speaking, and at making people feel comfortable around me.

i have a great relationship with my family, and when i see them i feel energised and loved.

i have a full bookshelf and a collection of dvds. a harddrive full of pirated movies and deleted fanfiction. a vibrator. a poster of dick grayson i got professionally framed. plants that are over seven years old. a comic book collection. a tiny cauldron. a horde of stationery. a belly. bad impulse control. a laugh that comes easy. a support system that's rock solid.

i'm 29 next friday. look what i have to show for it.

[icypantherwrites]

Someone recommended to me to message AO3 daily until the situation is resolved regarding To Become the Nightmare and while I generally try to avoid annoying the people who hold all the power in reinstating my story, I'm to the point where clearly that is not working. And if I am going to go by the end of April if they fail to resolve this, then I am not going to go quietly.

To that, in order to show them what actual support looks like and to give myself a little taste of the same, I'm including in each message a quote from one of my stories showing support, listening, compassion and/or empathy. And if you recall, I had mentioned I wanted to do something to support RAINN once my story was restored. Unfortunately my plans to do a writing drive event are done and over with as I no longer have any motivation or energy for it as this entire nightmare has just bled me dry. So instead of that, I'll be the one donating for this event and y'all will be the participants :)

For each story that I link to and post a quote for, if you leave an engaged comment on the day it is posted I will donate $1 to RAINN. For reference, an engaged comment is 100+ words about that story and those words cannot include copied text from the story to beef it up (if you have over 100 words without that and would like to quote, feel free). In the event I post a chaptered fic (which is the first one) you do not have to leave a comment on the final chapter; any chapter of the work works :) Also do not mention donations or any type of "monetary" word in your comment as apparently I can get suspended again for even others commenting such.

I'll keep a running tally on each day's quote for how much I'll be donating and I'll donate the final amount at the end of April or whenever they restore To Become the Nightmare, whichever comes first. Please feel free to share these posts to help spread the word and raise even more money for RAINN!

First story, here we go :)

Absent (4/20/2024)

“We’re all a little broken, Lance,” Shiro had said quietly. “But that’s why we have each other. We build ourselves back up. We support one another. And there is nothing that we cannot fix together.” 

[praisetheaxolotl]

I think it's real funny that like, Gravity Falls is, at its core, a show about growing up. And this blog in particular shaped my teen years, even when it went dark for a while. The fics i wrote for this fandom, inspired by this blog, were kind of the start of a new, better era of my writing. I met people that I still hold dear, even though we no longer talk. I met my fiance through this fandom!

And I'm still here. Whether I'm sixteen or twenty-two, I'm still the same. But also not. Time did do a number on me, and it's surreal to look back and realize that all my posts were me coping with personality disorders I didn't fully realize I had. I identified with Bill because I, too, felt confined, and wanted to let loose and burn it all down. But I was also a person, and I wanted Bill to be, too- a person who was unruly, destructive, and mean, but a person who did want some sort of stability at the end of the day, but someone who was stunted and, through horrific life experiences, didn't feel as if he could have that stability until he had ultimate control.

And then. It didn't work? So he tried the "out" he'd been given; the alternative option that he'd most likely brushed off as bogus or "too soft" for him.

And then what?

I grew up with this blog, and the stuff I did here shaped my later teenhood and my life going forward. This blog was never popular, not by a long shot- but it endured; and it still amazes me whenever I get new asks or new reblogs and rambles in the tags.

I've just been thinking about it all. At the end of the day, I was a lonely kid grappling with things I didn't understand, so I decided to grapple with them in a way I could understand- through Bill. I'm not so lonely as an adult, and a lot of my unpleasant-ness has been lost to time (though not all of it.) And the thing that helped me most was having a non-judgemental support system- exactly the thing I liked to imagine Bill having.

It's funny how it all worked out, in the end.