#when we can sleep at Amsterdam

[zoofzoofxx]

“OH MY GOD THAT’S JOOST KLEIN!”

(Pt. 2)

Pairing - Joost Klein x fem!reader

Summary - Following an attempt to ignore Joost and act as though nothing had happened, you both meet on a rainy day while waiting for the bus. He offers you a ride but first takes you out for a dinner and shows you the beauty of Amsterdam at night.

Genre- fluff, maybe little bit of angst.

Mentions - @dozcan123 , @multifilmfan & @mrschandlerbing

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About three months back, something went down with Joost Klein. We chatted at first, but then I got busy, and Joost wouldn't quit trying to get in touch. I brushed off his messages until I finally blocked his number. After that, he stopped trying to reach out on other social platforms. I felt a bit guilty, but I figured he probably moved on. Sometimes I thought about unblocking him and telling him how I felt, but when I saw he was into Eurovision, I hesitated. 3 weeks ago, he dropped a track called Europapa, and it blew up. The song brought back memories of Joost, making me consider going to Eurovision with my sister. Lost in thought, a message from my best friend Zofia interrupted me, signaling her arrival. We decided to grab a drink and catch up, with Zofia's unexpected entrance and our trip to a nearby bar helping clear my head.

⋆ ˚｡⋆୨୧˚ 3 hours later ˚୨୧⋆｡˚ ⋆

I checked my bus app to see when my bus will arrive. I still had 35 minutes left but the walk wasn’t short so basically I already should be on my way. I escorted my best friend to her place; she was completely wasted, and so was I. It was the usual routine - she'd get super drunk, I'd have to take her home, and then make sure I got back to my flat safely at night. I glanced at my friend before asking if she could at least get ready for bed and sleep. She agreed, closed the door, leaving me alone. I turned on maps to find the nearest bus stop direction, and just as I did, a few raindrops fell on my screen, signaling the impending rain. And sure enough, it started pouring. I began to run, and as I was about to cross the street, a car came speeding towards me, honking loudly, nearly hitting me. Shocked, I turned around, not knowing what to do. The car was already gone, so I tried to forget the scary moment and went to sit on the bench at the bus stop just a few steps away. Sitting there, rain pouring down on me as there was no roof over the bench, I stared at the ground, hoping the bus would arrive soon, even though I still had 10 more minutes to wait in the cold rain.

“Y/n?” A low male voice with a pronounced Dutch accent addressed me. I turned looked up to find a recognizable individual standing directly in front of me. I was taken aback by the sight of him drenched from head to toe, standing there as confused as I was.

"Joost?" I uttered, rising to my feet and adjusting my coat. An extended pause ensued, with neither of us certain of how to initiate this dialogue.

"It was you crossing the street? Please be more cautious next time," he began, causing my eyes to widen in surprise.

"I apologize." I glanced aside and then back at him. He appeared altered. His hair had brightened notably, nearly reaching a platinum blond tone. His demeanor was grave. It seemed like he wasn't content to see me, and frankly, I wasn't excited either.

"How are you?" Were the only words that escaped my lips.

"I'm good. Have you been drinking?" He inquired, moving a bit closer, though there was still a noticeable gap between us. I caught a whiff of his cologne once more. It was the same scent from three months back when he assisted me in zipping up my jacket.

"Tipsy, not drunk," I corrected him, settling back onto the bench, which was once again damp. I glanced down at my shoes, feeling embarrassed.

"I can catch a whiff of the alcohol from here," he remarked, and I simply pouted, unsure of how to respond. He moved closer and settled beside me. Our shoulders brushed together. In a sudden impulse, I rested my head on his shoulder, shutting my eyes and relishing the moment. It dawned on me how much I had missed Joost.

"Y/n, do you want a lift?" Joost interrupted my thoughts. I hesitated a lot, unsure if I should say yes or no.

"Sure." I say standing up. He stood up as well, and I just followed him. It was a 1-minute walk until we arrived at the car I almost got hit by. I sat in the passenger seat and inhaled the scent, Joost's specific cologne mixed with cigarettes. I yawned, leaning on the window. He started his car, and we drove through the city. There was complete silence between us until there was a loud growl. I covered my stomach with my arm and started to daydream about what I would eat when I arrived home.

“What are you doing?” I inquired as Joost made a sudden right turn.

“I’m starving, do you like McDonalds?” He asked and I furrowed my brows.

"I suppose so, but I've got some food at home, so I'll decline," I replied, earning a chuckle from the blonde guy.

"Ha, that's totally a classic mom move: 'We've got food at home,'" he mimicked, leading to a moment of silence as we both pondered our next words.

"It's on me." He stated, breaking the silence as he parked his car in the parking lot and switched it off.

"Please," he uttered, casting me those identical pleading eyes as during our initial encounter. Exhaling deeply, I release my seatbelt and unlatch the car door.

"Macdonalds around midnight just hits differently," Joost remarked as he savored his first bite of the Big Mac.

"Would you like some?" He inquired, flashing me a comforting smile.

"Thanks, but I'm good," I replied, smiling back, enjoying my chicken nuggets. I noticed Joost eyeing them, so I pushed the box towards him and nodded, signaling he could give them a try.

"May I?" He inquired, gazing at me. He looked very handsome. His beautiful blue eyes peered through his thick-framed glasses. He wore a Burberry scarf around his neck. His sharp jawline was what made him truly attractive.

"Sure," I replied, looking down, aware that I was blushing intensely.

"You know I've never tasted chicken nuggets," he remarks as he takes one, slyly snatching the sauce I was using. He sampled the nugget while I indulged in some French fries that I also relished. I glanced out the window; it was entirely dim outside. Then I shifted my gaze back to Joost.

"Why did you block my number?" He inquired out of the blue. I sat upright, unable to provide a response to his query.

"I was occupied," I replied curtly, feeling a bit anxious that this conversation might escalate. He simply nodded, unsure of what to say. After a moment of contemplation, he finally broke the silence.

"Occupied with someone?" He inquired, prompting me to tilt my head slightly. I needed a moment to ponder and craft a thoughtful response. I wasn't preoccupied with anyone. I was simply engrossed in self-care, focusing on my mental well-being, striving to improve my life even just a little. My daily routine felt monotonous - waking up, having breakfast, heading to work, eating dinner, sleeping, and repeating the cycle. I grew weary of this routine. I longed for my parents, my younger sister, and the carefree days of childhood.

“No.” I replied dryly, as I took my final sips of coke. Joost had already pushed the box back, but I nudged it back to signal that he can have the last nuggets. He accepted the food, pondering his response before blurting out something foolish.

“So you were occupied with…?” He prompted me to complete the sentence. I simply sighed in response.

"My mental health," I respond, causing his eyebrows to shoot up in surprise.

"You could have informed me that you were having a tough time. I would have been there to support you," he says, gazing at me with concern.

"I just needed some time to myself," I say, hoping to end this conversation.

"You know, I felt foolish when you blocked me. You could have simply mentioned you weren't interested in me, and I would have backed off," he says, sitting upright, with a hint of remorse in his eyes as he gazes at my hands. I was fidgeting with my sleeve.

"Feeling tense?" He asks, taking hold of my hand. I wanted to say no, but deep down, I knew I could only answer yes.

"No. Not really." I respond, attempting to avoid the eye contact he's seeking.

"Do you desire any more food?" He inquired, and I simply shook my head to decline.

"Let’s go then." He suggests, gently patting my back. We exited the building together.

"I can walk home from here," I say, glancing at him. He was tall and had a very masculine appearance.

"Can I accompany you home?" He questioned, and unsure if it was a wise choice, I sensed it might be our last meeting for a long time, or possibly never again. Nevertheless, I nodded, and he grinned. We began walking towards my house.

"I like your scarf," I mentioned, breaking the silence. He didn't say anything but gently removed it and wrapped it around my head.

"It looks much more flattering on you," he remarks with a smile, reaching out to grasp my shoulder, drawing me closer to him. Suddenly, he makes a wrong turn.

"That's not the route to my place," I mention, furrowing my brows. I was nearly sober.

"I know. There's a spot I'd like to take you to," he mentions as we reach the bridge. The wind was strong, messing up Joost's hair. He tried to fix it quickly, but it didn't really work. I couldn't help but laugh, and he rolled his eyes, clicking his tongue in response.

"Hey, what's so funny?" he says playfully, giving me a gentle push.

"Nothing," I uttered as he drew me closer once more, and I simply relished the moment. It dawned on me that I was thoroughly enjoying the time with the tall Dutch gentleman. A quiet interval ensued until we reached a bridge. It was truly a sight to behold, and I couldn't resist capturing it in a photograph. Stepping back, I ensured Joost was also in the frame. He glanced at me, posed with a smile, and shaped a heart with his fingers.

"Aww, adorable!" I say with a smile, and he approached without a word. I tucked my phone away, and Joost simply embraced me. No words. No sounds. Just two individuals embracing at the bridge. Two hearts beating in unison.

"I deeply yearned for you," is the only utterance he managed.

"I missed you as well," I reply softly, maintaining the embrace. We linger in the moment before eventually deciding to head back home as the chill of the evening sets in.

"When do you plan to depart for Sweden?" I inquire purely out of interest.

"My manager mentioned they're counting on me to be at the hotel tomorrow," I respond, nodding in understanding.

"Are you not keen on joining me?" He inquired. He had already asked me this question during our meal.

"I'd be happy to join, but I need to find a way to make some money," I respond, to which he pouts in disappointment.

"I comprehend. Please inform me if your decision changes," he states, and I offer a smile. Upon reaching my residence, we bid our final farewells. He mentioned I could keep the scarf but requested something in return. As I lacked valuable items, he noticed my bag and a small keychain, a fluffy pink heart. He inquired about exchanging it, to which I happily agreed, asking if he desired anything else, but he declined. We shared a parting hug, and he mentioned he would text me. After he left, I unblocked his number but never received a message from him again.

A/n - guys I’m so sorry this is so shitty 😭 I feel like I made so much grammar mistakes. English isn’t my native language so if you see any mistakes please contact me 😘 BY THE WAY I DONT KNOW IF YALL NOTICED BUT Y/N’S BEST FRIEND IS ACTUALLY ME 😍😍😍😍😍THANK YOU SO MICH FOR 60 FOLLOWERS ILY! leave a comment behind please it gives me a lot of motivation ✌🏻 I’m actually thinking if I should make a part 3 but idk lmk 😊 PEACE OUT 😇✌🏻LUV U GUYS 🥰❗️💋💋💋💋💋

[monzabee]

beach read - mv1

masterlist

Summary: The one where you and Max go on a holiday for the first time, and you realize just how much you love 'Vacation Max'.

Pairing: max verstappen x reader

Word Count: 2.4k

Warnings: fluff!! vacation max, bagels and beans slander (from someone who lives in amsterdam, guys, i’m just the messenger here), max is an angel. 

Request: “Yn is the new girlfriend of max verstappen, and they are going for the first together on a holiday, first location Greece and then the netherlands where he gets her a promise ring with a lot of fluff thanks” - this was requested by @maximeverstappen !!

Author’s Note: hi, hey, hello!! a request came in with a holiday concept and you know I had to use a title from an emily henry novel. can you tell i wrote this while listening to the entire mamma mia soundrack? The first AND the second one because we don’t discriminate. thank you, anon, for the request, i hope you guys enjoy! good morning, noon or night wherever you are, xoxobee

Please also note that all of my works are protected under copyright, and not available for reposting on other platforms. 

There is a big difference between on-season Max and off-season Max. After dating for a few months, you begin to see the differences between the two, which is a lot. He is a man of habit, Max is. He wakes up at the same time every morning to train during the season, and he has his breakfast a certain way before going about his day – which you guessed it, is planned from start to finish. But he’s different when he is on break. If the two of you decide to go back to Monte Carlo to enjoy the sun for a little bit, his demeanour changes from the ‘Mad Max’ everyone deems him as into what you like to call ‘Vacation Max’.  

The first location of your vacation is a small island in Greece called Skopelos. With all of his alarms turned off from the minute the season enters into a break, the two of you have the luxury to sleep in. You try your hardest not to let the sun shining through the windows bother you because of how comfortable you are in your current position – snuggled into the covers with Max cuddling into you. But since the two of you were very tired last night and forgot to close the curtains, you’re unfortunately the victim of the sun shining through the room. You try to get under from Max as slowly as possible to not wake him, but his arm tightening around your waist paired with a groan are both indicators of the fact that you’ve failed to do so.

He mumbles in a deep morning voice as he hides his face in your hair to get away from the sun. “Stay, liefje, we’re on a vacation.”

“Max, the curtains.” You whine, wriggling in your place, you try to get away from his hold while you let out a groan. 

“Shh,” He shushes you, as his arms slowly turn your body towards his and gently makes you place your head on his chest. “Better?” You let out an appreciative hum, followed by a yawn, which makes you close your eyes and promptly go back to sleep. You wake up much later and decide to find a breakfast spot to try instead of spending your morning in the small boutique hotel. You’re in the middle of putting on sunscreen when Max pops his head into the bathroom, his head tilted to the side with wonder. “What are you doing?” He asks while moving to stand behind you and wrap his arms around your waist. 

“Sunscreen.” You mumble, blending the SPF into your skin. You turn in his arms towards him once you’re done with yours. “Your turn.”

He shakes his head in disagreement, voicing it with a whine as you start applying the crème on his face. “It smells disgusting, liefje.”

“But it’ll keep from burning like bacon.” You smile at your handiwork once you’re done, giving him a small kiss on the lips. “Perfect.” 

You end up having breakfast by a small café near the sea, the table your waitress sits you in is so close to the water that it’s basically seafront. You share pancakes and fruit for breakfast, and you convince him to try Greek frappe, a type of whipped iced coffee. You’re surprised when he drinks the entire glass in one go, claiming that it’s his new favourite way to drink coffee. The rest of the day is spent on the beach; the two of you go for a swim in which Max’s competitive side takes over for a second when you decide to race to the shore. He pulls you towards him by gently tugging your leg when you’re just about to pass him and get to the shore first. 

You let out a loud laugh while splashing water towards him to slow him down. “You’re a cheat, Max Verstappen!” You yell as he comes out of the water, sending a boyish grin and a wink towards your way, in which you poke your tongue out to him in response.  

He helps you to dry off with a towel before he does it himself, and you thank him with a small smile and a kiss to his cheek. When you lay down on the lounge chair, he’s quick to follow you, finding himself a place between your legs, face down, with his chin resting against your stomach. Not a long time pass before his breathing evens out and he drifts off to a sleep. One of your hands occupy itself by playing with his damp hair whilst the other one hold the book you’ve specifically packed in hopes of reading it on the beach. With Max taking an afternoon nap, you read your book in peace for a while. 

“What are you reading?” Max asks, a sleepy look in his eyes. 

You dog-ear the page you’re on before turning you attention to the man who’s looking at you with a drowsy pout on his face. “Beach Read, it’s a book I picked out at the airport.” 

“Is it good?” He asks before putting his head back down and this time leaning his cheek against your stomach. You smile softly and let out an affirmative hum as your hand’s movements continue and slowly lull him to another nap. “Can you read some to me?” He asks, his arms also wrapping themselves around your body. 

You chuckle as you open your book to the page where you left off. “Of course, Max.”

The rest of your week in Greece is filled with sun and sea induced sleeps and fresh fruit, and you see another side of Max, which is relaxed and laid back. You think you like this side of your boyfriend. 

The next location of your vacation with Max is actually Amsterdam. You’re not really sure why you’ve chosen such a lively place after spending two weeks in a calm Greek island, but you’re excited to explore the city with him. 

“We are not going to Bagels & Beans, schat.” He announces as he passes through the hotel room, looking for his wallet and phone. 

“What?” You ask, poking your head from the bathroom and thus taking a break from doing your makeup. “Why not?” 

“It’s filled with tourists, that’s why.” He says, smiling as he shakes his head because of the perplexed look on your face.

You let your pout take over your expression. “But it’s supposed to be very good.” You try to argue, stalking towards him and fisting his shirting gently. “Can we try it out, please?” 

“Schatje,” He groans, placing his palm over your cheek and letting his thumb caress your cheekbone. “The tourists.” He seems to remind you. 

“They’ll be all over the city too; maybe we should just pack up and leave, then.” You argue while rolling your eyes but leaning against his touch, nevertheless. “I heard they made really good sourdough bagels.” You sing in a light voice. 

“You are trouble, you know that?” He asks you with raised eyebrows. 

“Yes, but you love me.” You grin, he doesn’t disagree with you as he rolls his eyes. 

The breakfast over at Bagels & Beans go swimmingly if you say so yourself. There’s a smug look on your face as Max eats his bagel in record time and goes inside to get a second one because “Have you tried their wasabi mayo? It’s simply lovely.” You choose to go for creme cheese and strawberry jam on a sourdough, which is to your liking. The two of you walk around the city the entire morning and afternoon, taking pictures on the bridges over the canal, even though Max complains that it makes you look like tourists – “We are, tourists,” you remind him, or going into shops which sell knick knacks, you end up buying a small model of a clog for your parents, liking the bright colour of it and the painted details. You eventually find yourself in a farmers market, looking at blooming flowers and sampling all kind of cheese, Max even shows off his juggling skills to you at a fruit stand with tangerines and lemons. Before you end the day with dinner, you convince him to get some tulip 

seeds for your garden back home. 

“You don’t have a garden, Y/N.” He reminds you while holding all the different pack of seeds you hold out his way. 

“Well maybe I’ll start one with these ones.” You argue – and you end up planting them in small pots over you balcony when you get home, too. 

The next day, he takes you over to the Van Gogh Museum. You’re looking around you in awe the entire time, dragging Max from painting to painting and reading all the descriptions. For some of the displays where there’s only Dutch descriptions are provided for the moment, he’s more than happy to take on the role of translator for you. The two of you spend some time in an immersive part of the exhibition for a while, just sitting down and talking about life while also enjoying the paintings being reflected onto the surfaces of the room via the projector. He smiles so widely when you attempt to pronounce some of the Dutch words you’ve encountered over the past few days, and the glint in his eyes making you smile the same way. After leaving the museum, he takes you over to a stand to try Dutch pancakes for the first time. 

“What’s the difference?” You ask him while eyeing the pancake on the carton plate. 

“I’m not sure,” He replies. “But it has Belgian chocolate on it as well, so you’ll probably like it.” 

“Max, I think this is you in a dish.” You joke, making him send an unamused glare to your way. 

“No, schatje, that was a very bad joke.” He announces as he shakes his head. 

You shrug, taking a bite of the oversized pancake as you let out a small sigh. “But this tastes so good, though!” 

Still full from your little culinary tour over the city of Amsterdam, the two of you opt for a very late dinner. By the time you and Max arrive onto the boat he rented out for the night, the night sky is filled with stars, and you can see all of them through the sky roof of the boat. Everything is the epitome of romance, from the way the table is set with a singular rose as its centrepiece, to the moonlit atmosphere of the boat, to the way Max pulls out you chair for you to sit. The two of you enjoy your dinner over a bottle of wine, and by the time the dessert is served, there is a slight tint to both of your cheeks from the alcohol and the laughing. Max holds your hand over the table in his, leaning forward slightly as he makes sure he’s not missing a word of what you’re saying. He realises, in that moment that it doesn’t matter if you’re talking to him about the most exciting thing in the world or the most tedious, he will give up everything to hear the excitement in your voice. 

“Do you remember that restaurant we had dinner in Greece, the one where you had to catch your own fish? The look on your face was hilarious, Max! I don’t think I had more fun in my life than I had in this past few weeks.” You laugh, tilting your head to the side as you lock eyes with the man sitting across from you. “Thank you, my love.”

“You’re welcome.” He replies, tangling his fingers in yours as he smiles – though there is more of a mischievous undertone to it than usual. “I have something for you, but you have to promise me you won’t freak out.” 

You let out a giggle while shaking your head. “Just what every girl wants to hear before receiving a gift from their boyfriends, Maxie.”

“Oh, hush.” He shushes you as he leans sideways for a moment to take out the small bag which was behind one of the legs of his chair. There’s a smile on his face which indicates that he’s proud of himself. “There you go.” 

“Was that there the whole time?” You ask, eyeing the small bag while cautiously playing with the small ribbon tied to one of its handles with your free hand. 

Max gives you yet another one of his unamused looks, motioning the bag with his head. “Will you please just open it?”

“Okay, okay,” You breath out, pulling your hand from its and carefully opening the package, being mindful so that you don’t destroy it completely. You eyebrows furrow as you notice the small box, taking it out and inspecting it before you open it. “It’s a ring.” 

“Yes! Do you like it?” Max asks with a boyish smile. 

“Ring.” 

He nods. “Yes, liefje.”

“Why is it a ring?” You ask, your eyes finally finding his once again. “What kind of ring is it?”

“Well I think it’s gold, darling–”

“Max!” You exclaim, head shaking in disbelief. It is a gold ring, and on it there are engravings of small flowers with carefully placed, small gemstones. 

His expression remains serious for a second, and then he smiles. “I’m not proposing.” He continues as you exhale a relieved breath. “It’s a promise ring,” He clarifies, “I’m not proposing, yet.”  

Your voice is almost inaudibly soft. “A promise ring?”

“Yes, liefje.” He nods and get up from his seat, walking towards your chair and getting on his knees while takin the ring box out of your hands. “It means,” He starts explaining as he takes the ring out and places it on your ring finger. “That one day I will replace it with a real one, and that I can see myself getting old with you.” 

“You can see yourself getting old with me?” You repeat in a breathy voice, even though you’ve been sitting down all the time. 

“Yes, schatje. I call you my ‘love’ at least once a day, I thought that would be an indication of how I feel about you.”

“I know how you feel about me.” You say in a confident voice. “You love me and I love you.” 

“I love you.” He confirms. “And I can’t wait to marry you, one day.” 

“One day.” You affirm. He presses his lips against yours, and as you kiss under the moonlight on a boat in Amsterdam, with Max’s lips tasting like red wine and crème patisserie, you realise just how much you like ‘Vacation Max’. 

[its-time-to-write]

how about a Jamie x reader fic when they go away to Amsterdam they sit together on bus and they wake up cuddling and then there’s an issue w hotel booking and there’s a one bed trope and they end up waking up cuddled together and then they admit feelings and reader goes to game with a tartt jersey on <3

I’ve been thinking about this forever, and I’m terribly sorry it took so long!! I do enjoy being an adult, but I’m at a point in life where I don’t have much free time and if I do, I use it to sleep😂

I really miss the days when Ted Lasso was still airing and the x reader tags had new content every day. I feel like that one meme of Thanos when he’s like “Fine. I’ll do it myself.” Shoutout to all y’all who are still here and reading my stuff! Love you!!

smile at me

It’s straight-up fucked. It really, really is. But also maybe it’s good, as Keeley pointed out, because not having a boyfriend anymore means you can focus on yourself?

Or something. 

Of course he had to break up with you right before leaving for Amsterdam. Hell, he broke up with you because you were leaving for Amsterdam. 

“I don’t want you going to another country with a bunch of other guys,” he had said. “It’s them or me.”

“It’s literally my job,” you told him. 

Apparently, that didn’t matter. 

But what-fucking-ever, you’re at Keeley’s waiting for a car to take you to the airport, and she’s promised to make sure you don’t think about your stupid ex even once. 

It’s times like these you wish Ted were still here with a spot-on pun and some dad-type advice. All you ever get from Beard is a weird anecdote and a vaguely threatening look. 

Keeley chatters on for the entirety of the ride to the airport, through customs, and all the way to the lounge. 

“You’re gonna get loads of great content for the socials, babe. Candids, action shots, behind-the-scenes. Friendlies are fucking amazing!”

Last time Richmond were in Amsterdam, they had lost horribly. They’re hoping to make up for it this time around. 

The plane is full of Greyhounds, both footballers and coaches alike, with Rebecca at the very front. Keeley plops done in the seat next to her as Dani waves at you from the middle. 

“I saved you a seat!” he calls. You smile as Sam takes your bag to put it in the overhead. “Thanks, Dani. You excited?”

Dani grins. “I think this time I am ready to see a whole field of tulips!”

You laugh as the lads roll their eyes. Jamie leans across the aisle toward you and says, “Oi, what’s the twat doing while you’re away?” 

You press your lips into a thin line. “Not a clue.”

He raises an eyebrow and says, “You break up with him?”

“He broke up with me.”

Jamie twists his face into a scoff. “And you wonder why I call him the fucking twat. Prick. Bet it was so he could finally fuck his coworker.”

You shrug. Jamie’s never liked your boyfriend. It’s not like you were together long, only a few months. And sure, he was a little bit of a twat, but sue you. You had a special place in your heart for pricks with a heart of gold, only he didn’t even have a heart at all. 

“You should date someone better,” Jamie continues. 

You glare at him and retort, “Oh yeah, because it’s just that easy. You got some one in mind?”

Jamie gives you his most angelic look and says, “What about me?” which makes half the plane dissolve into laughter, yourself included. 

“Cheers, Jamie,” you say as you wipe your eyes. “I needed that.”

A strange look crosses his face, but it’s quickly replaced by his usual cocky expression. “Anytime, love,” he replies as you turn to start a conversation with Dani. 

As much as you’d like that, Jamie would never date you. His joke stings a little but you brush it off. Maybe you’ll find another twat in Amsterdam to distract yourself from the fact that you’re half in love with Jamie Tartt.

—

“I’m sorry, we don’t have a booking under you name,” the hotel concierge says.

You tap your nails to your wrist. “Are you positive? I’m with AFC Richmond, they should’ve had one.”

The concierge taps on his computer for a moment before shaking his head. “No, I’m afraid we don’t have anything. And all of our rooms are booked this weekend. Might I recommend the hotel down the road?”

Damn it. There’s no way this is happening. Everyone else has gotten to their rooms without a hitch and here you are, alone in the lobby as you pull out your phone to call Keeley. There’s no way this is fucking happening. 

“Everything alright?” asks a voice behind you, and you jump. 

“They don’t have a room for me, and they’re fully booked,” you explain. 

Jamie looks at the concierge, who shrugs apologetically, then back to you. He asks, “Why don’t you share with me?” and you frown. 

“I thought you were rooming with Declan,” you say. 

Jamie lifts a shoulder. “Yeah, but he switched with Richard because O’Brien fucking snores and he don’t give a shit.”

You say, “So you’re with Richard, then,” and he shakes his head. 

“Nah, Richard’s with Jan.”

“I thought Dani was with Jan,” you say. These fucking footballers. What’s the point in having set rooms if they’re just going to switch it all up.

“Dani is with Jan,” Jamie says patiently, as if this all the most obvious thing in the world. “But Dani’s a cuddler, so he’s probably going to fucking end up with, I don’t know, Isaac or someone. Which means I get a room all to meself.”

“Right,” you say slowly. “Alright, I can do that. As long as you don’t mind.”

Jamie winks. “Sharing a room with a pretty girl for four days? Ain’t a problem, love.”

You laugh and follow him to the elevator.

—

It feels a bit like playing with fire, agreeing to room with Jamie. Especially since you’re freshly single and definitely open to a rebound. But there will be two beds and a lot of space and anyway, you’ll be busy with the match and social media, respectively. 

Except as soon as you walk through the door, you realize there’s a tiny little hitch.

“There’s one bed,” you blurt out, so surprised you’re unable to filter your words. Jamie blushes a little bit as he says, “Yeah, um, Cockburn and I hate sleeping alone, so we asked for one. He grew up sharing a bed with his brothers and I just fucking hate being alone. I can sleep on the couch if you want.”

“No,” you say firmly, “you need good rest. It’s not a problem.”

It’s not a problem. 

Or at least it wouldn’t have been if Isaac had been a shittier captain. 

But as it is he’s great, so he’s got the whole team going out to dinner at a pre-determined location complete with a dress code of no t-shirts and apparently you count as part of the team, so you have to go too. You’re in your massive bathroom trying to curl your disgusting travel hair when Jamie walks in wearing one of those white hotel bathrobes.

He asks, “You mind if I’m in here?” so you shake your head, struck temporarily mute by his bare clavicle. Fucking hell, you feel like a repressed Victorian woman. 

Jamie says, “Mint,” and goes about his alarmingly detailed skincare routine. You’re pretty sure you’re done with your hair so you crane your neck in an attempt to check the back. 

“Missed a spot,” Jamie says. “Want me to get it for you?”

You shoot him a dubious look but hand him the curler. He runs a hand through your hair, picking up the offending strand and it’s all you can do not to shiver. 

“Mum taught me,” he explains and you nod ever so slightly, not wanting him to accidentally burn your neck. Jamie says, “All good,” and runs his whole hand through your hair this time, making the curls bounce. 

You choke out, “Thanks,” and hurriedly put away your things, desperate to leave before Jamie can pick up on the fact that you can barely handle being in the same room as him, and that you have great concerns about what the night will bring. 

—

“You look fucking hot,” is the first thing Rebecca says when you meet her in the lobby. Keeley looks mildly offended that Rebecca took the words out of her mouth, but she just laughs and taps your arm. 

“Gonna break a few hearts tonight, yeah?” she grins.

You’re not sure about that, especially since dinner turns out to be a very domestic affair. It’s loud, sure, but it’s definitely toned down since it’s a pre-match celebration instead of a post-match one. You’re with Sam, Keeley, and Roy with Jamie far, far away. You push all thoughts of him from your brain only for memories of your ex to surface. You frown. 

“The fuck’s wrong with you?” Roy says and for a moment, you think he’s talking to you. But he’s actually talking to Jamie who has moved from his place across the restaurant to right behind your chair. 

“Fuck off grandad,” Jamie says good-naturedly. “Wanted to tell this one that some of the lads are going out dancing after this. Not too late,” he hastily adds at Roy’s burning scowl, “just for two hours and we’re only allowed one drink.”

You’re pretty sure that’s a bit more liberal than Roy likes, but he nods his head slightly so he must be in a good mood.

“So, you coming?” Jamie asks and before you can reply Sam and Keeley chorus, “Yes she is.”

You give Keeley a Look before turning back to Jamie. “Guess I am,” you reply.

The smile Jamie gives you does more to make your head spin than any amount of alcohol you’ve had in your lifetime.

—

Jamie has taken it upon himself to wipe that frown off your face. He might have been watching you over dinner and that might have been why he chose that exact moment to invite you out, but he’ll never fucking admit it to anyone except Sam. And Keeley. And maybe Cockburn when it was the off-season and they were a little tipsy. (But not drunk, never drunk.) 

So yeah, sue him if he’s spinning you around on the crowded dance floor just because it makes you laugh. It’s not his fault that he’s been wildly in love with you since the day Higgins hired you. It’s not his fault that you’re easy to be around and have the most beautiful smile he’s seen in his life. 

And fuck, it certainly isn’t his fault you can’t see in yourself what others do. Why you settled for a piece of shit like your ex, he’ll never know. But he’ll be damned if he doesn’t do his best to show you how special you are. He knows you’ll never feel the same about him, but maybe he can help you level up your standards. Maybe if you’re with someone good, it’ll hurt less that it’s not him. 

So he lets you hold his hand for the entirety of the two hours that the team is out and doesn’t say a word when you don’t let go in the cab back to the hotel. 

You’ve gotten that closed-off look in your eyes again, the one that means you’re thinking about your ex, so Jamie knocks his shoulder into yours and asks why he can’t have the password to the team’s Instagram account, which is a sure fire way to get you to lecture him on irresponsibility and aesthetics and the best way to get your eyes to come back to life.

—

Honestly, it’s easier to fall asleep than you might have expected. It’s a big bed and you’re fucking tired. 

You just didn’t expect to wake up in the middle of the night crying, but it’s always fucking like this when you go through a breakup. You go to sleep fine and wake up sad, so you do your best not to wake up Jamie except you’ve both ended up entangled in each other’s arms, so he can feel you shaking. 

“Hey,” Jamie says in a soft voice, “You’re okay, love.”

You half expect him to push you away once he realizes you’re so close, but he only pulls you closer and presses a kiss to your forehead. Maybe it’s because you’re both half-asleep, but it feels like the most natural thing in the world. 

You sigh and settle into him, drifting off in a matter of moments. 

—

You wake up to a pair of blue eyes watching you. 

“How you feeling?” Jamie asks, voice gravelly with sleep. 

You just blink at him. It’s hard to form coherent sentences within the first ten seconds of waking up, and even harder with the memory of Jamie’s arms around you last night. 

Wait. Not just the memory. The present reality because neither of you have moved. 

Jamie misinterprets your silence and begins to extricate his arms.

“Sorry,” he says, “I’m not to trying to like, cross and fucking boundary or something. Should’ve left you alone.”

You’re still not awake enough to talk so you grab him to stop him from moving away. He gives you a questioning look so you say, “I wouldn’t have agreed to share a bed if I thought you were a creep.”

Jamie grins. “So like, if Jan had offered to share a room you’d’ve said no.”

You wrinkle your nose as you say, “Jan’s not a creep.”

“He’s the fucking worst,” Jamie grumbles, “And anyway, can we not talk about Jan fucking Maas this early in the morning?”

“Sure,” you say, “let’s talk about something else.”

Despite your comment, you both lapse into silence. You’re enraptured by Jamie’s blue eyes. You’ve never been able to study them this close before, and you want to take this opportunity to memorize every fleck of green. 

Jamie seems to have a similar thought, except his gaze flicks to your lips. 

“I have morning breath,” you tell him and he says, “Real men don’t give a shit, babe,” before leaning forward.

It’s softer than you’d expected, sweeter. 

It’s also strange to think that you’re making out with Jamie in bed, and that he’s the one who initiated it.

The thought is so absurd that you giggle, mid-kiss. Jamie breaks away and says, “Oi, there’s no way that was a shit kiss.”

“No,” you say between giggles, “it’s just weird that we’re doing this. Like, how are we supposed to look each other in the eye after?”

Jamie moves so he can look at you better, and you roll from your side to your back. “What do you mean?” he asks.

“Oh come on, we share a room and a bed, we kiss because I have all these sad feelings and you’re feeling a lot of emotions about the match, and then we have to work together after. It’s silly.”

Jamie cocks his head. “That’s what you think is happening?”

“Yes?” you say. None of this is going how it’s supposed to. “What do you think is happening?”

“I like you,” he says, and there is absolutely no mistaking his meaning. 

“Oh,” you reply in a small voice. “Since when?”

“Since before you started dating the twat. When Higgins introduced ya to the team.”

“That’s a fucking long time ago!” you exclaim. “Were you ever going to tell me?”

Jamie rubs his face. “Yeah, ‘cept you showed up to work tellin’ everyone how you started dating the twat. And I ain’t a home wrecker.”

You groan. “Fuuuck. I literally only dated him to try to get over you.”

Jamie shoots up. “What?!”

“Yeah,” you say, “I’ve been like a little bit in love with you ever since you winked at me during that first promo I did.”

Jamie blows out a breath. “Okay. Think that’s enough talking. C’mere. We’re making out proper, like, then we’re going to breakfast.”

You grin as you climb onto his lap. 

[axelsagewrites]

Jamie Tartt*Bus Ride

Pairing: Jamie x f!reader

Word count: 1352

Warnings: fingering, semi public, teasing, smut 18+

Masterlist here

You had been in Amsterdam with the boys partly as the teams Physio encase the Dutch played dirty but also as Jamies new girlfriend. well, it wasn’t too new just not very known about. you had been dating each other for about three months now and you had decided to keep it under wraps to avoid any drama or stress but also because it felt nice to have a secret.

Roy knew because he liked to randomly show up at 4 am and pound on Jamies door till he answered and one time it was you who opened the door half naked and already yelling at him before your eyes went wide as a deer in the head lights. Luckily, Roy was not exactly much of a talker. Besides everyone was used to a Physio being around players so often and you had been friends for years prior so no one guessed at thing.

You were on the bus back to the airport however everyone on the bus was either exhausted, hung over, or a combination of both. you and Jamie were sat together near the back of the bus surrounded by a bunch of snoring footballers. the only ones not knackered were you, Jamie, and Roy since instead of drinking, partying, or sleeping in random men’s boats you had all spent the evening teaching Roy how to hide a bike and listening to tour guide barbie aka Jamie talk about light houses.

Roy however was at the front of the bus meaning everyone around you was asleep and couldn’t see the way you snuggled into Jamies side or how his hand rested on your lap. Still Jamie had brought a blanket encase you were tired so now you were sat snuggled up, blanket covering you both.

You were so caught up in your own thoughts you didn’t notice Jamies hand creeping from your outer to inner thigh till you felt his finger trail slowly over your panties. your eyes went wide, your head snapping towards him to see a shit eating grin on his face as his eyes stayed forward. you went to speak but Jamie’s whisper cut you off, “Quiet sweetheart. Grampas trying to read down there. He hates being interrupted,”

You wanted to protest, to tell him this was wrong but when his fingers trailed up, slowly rubbing your clit over your panties you could feel yourself getting turned on. Jamie leaned down, his lips brushing your ear as he spoke, “Already so wet princess,” he whispered so quietly that only you could hear but the words made you shiver, “How very naughty of you,” you could hear the smirk in his voice but couldn’t bring yourself to turn to face him.

Your eyes glanced to the seat across from you where Sam and Danni slept, both with headphones in. If anyone was awake you could see the headsets on them from here. but no one was looking back. no one could see how your hand grabbed Jamies arm under the blanket. that strong arm. fuck this was hot, you couldn’t deny it and Jamie knew it when you didn’t even try pull his arm away.

his fingers slowly rubbed circles onto your clit, only making you wetter and making it harder not to whine for more. your eyes darted to your watch. you’d be at the airport in 20 minutes. people would be waking up soon. but then you felt Jamie’s fingers slowly move to slip beneath your panties, going excruciatingly slow.

you didn’t have to look at him to see his smirk but when you did god was it hot. your breathing caught when you felt his fingers slowly tease the entrance of your hole. usually this was the point you begged and whined, and Jamie pondered out loud if you deserved him to fuck you with his fingers but not now. now all you could do was buck your hips making Jamie chuckle quietly.

“Patient baby,” Jamie whispered in your ear, his hot breath sending chills down your spine, “Can’t go waking em up now, can we?” he said, his fingers slowly slipping in.

your head moved to lean onto his shoulder, twisting to hide your face as you bite your lip. if anyone was to look back you knew they couldn’t see under the blanket, but you didn’t need them to see your ‘please just fuck me already’ face.

you could tell Jamie was enjoying this and before you could think of how to get him back his fingers began to push in, stretching you out perfectly. the other issue was that the whole time you were in Amsterdam you hadn’t been able to do anything. any time you headed to his room one of the guys would see you and you had to make up an excuse so eventually you had given up.

all this meant that when Jamie began to curl his fingers with expert precision you almost chewed through your lip trying to stay quiet. this was a new position though, so Jamie took his time, slowly working his fingers till he grazed that familiar spot. you sucked in a deep breath when you felt his fingertip brush it making Jamie chuckle and you clench his free wrist under the blanket.

Jamie leant over, kissing the top of your head as you leaned into his shoulder. you could feel your orgasm approaching but you’d never had to hide it like this, and you weren’t sure you could, but you also didn’t want to make him stop. not when you were so close and had been waiting for this for days.

when you felt your body tighten, your legs clenching around Jamie’s hand, you tightened your grip on his wrist till you worried it would snap. when your orgasm hit you felt like you couldn’t breathe as your body twitch around his fingers much to your protest. the faintest whine left your lips as your rode it out, Jamie groaning lightly when he heard it.

as you came down from your high, wondering how the hell you were supposed to get him back, Jamie removed his hand and moved so you could properly crash into his shoulder to recover. with your hand falling and free his wrist he moved to pull the blanket further up your body as your eyes fluttered shut.

a few moments past when you heard a quiet psst from somewhere nearby. you were too terrified to open your eyes, afraid you had been caught, but you felt Jamie turn his head. “Look at you too,” you heard Dannis quiet whisper from the seat across the aisle. “This is too cute my friend. you have to ask her out already,”

You could feel the way Jamie chuckled, vibrations running through his chest, “Maybe mate. Been thinking about it ya know,” he said as you tried not to laugh or smile.

“For what its worth I agree with Danni,” Sam piped, doing his best not to wake you despite you internally grinning like an idiot. “Yous too are perfect for each other,”

“Nah man she’s outta my league,” Jamie said making you roll your eyes behind your eyelids at this cocky little shit who you knew was grinning like an idiot on the outside.

“True that bruv,” Issac said, not even trying to keep his voice down almost making you laugh and blow your cover, “She’s well too good for you,”

“Tell me about it,” Jamie joked, and you waited a couple moments before pretending to stir as Jamie shushed the boys around.

you yawned, trying your best to make it realistic, “Morning boys,” you said as Danni, Sam, and Issac all turned pretending to have never been saying a word. man, it was getting hard not to laugh. you turned to jamie, whispering lowly, “I’m gonna kill you for that,” you smiled, trying to look innocent as Jamie laughed. Jamies laugh soon died when he pulled out his phone and saw a text from Roy.

“I am going to fucking murder you both and fling your bodies in the canal,”

[mikerickson]

8/29/2024 - 9/6/2024

If I had a nickel for every time I took a vacation in a small European naval power that historically punched above its weight in global affairs I'd have two nickels, which... ah, you know the rest.

Just got back from a trip to the Netherlands and Belgium that was basically: Amsterdam -> Apeldoorn -> Utrecht -> Den Haag -> Brussels -> Ghent -> Amsterdam. I will now proceed to talk to myself about the highlights below the cut.

Still can't sleep on planes. I even took a sleeping pill and bought a fancy new neck pillow thing to help, but instead I was just exhausted and strangling myself. My dinner also didn't sit well with me, so every time I was about to fall asleep, my gag reflex would trigger and I felt like I was gonna throw up. Seven hours of this was not very relaxing.

Landed at ass o'clock in the morning local time and had 6 hours to kill before hotel check in. I've always read that spending time outdoors in natural sunlight helps regulate your circadian rhythm and can fight jet lag, so I took us to look at some windmills. This was kind of a blur and I'm not certain it made much of a difference because I did end up crashing and taking a nap in the afternoon anyway.

Acknowledging that I am biased about this because I am 1) American and 2) literally a traffic engineer by trade, I simply cannot describe the Netherlands as anything other than "car-hostile". I felt actively unsafe driving around each city we visited because there are so many people on bicycles everywhere, who have right of way. Hell, even as a pedestrian I didn't feel safe because they come at you from every direction and you gotta keep your head on a swivel at all times. In The Hague I watched a woman get knocked into by a cyclist who just shouted over her shoulder "Let op voor fietsen!" ("Watch out for bikes!") and carried on.

Amsterdam ended up being more interesting than I was expecting and now I kinda wish I had dedicated one more day for it in the itinerary. Convenient and easy mass-transit system, some of the best bookstores I've ever been in, and beautiful canals everywhere you look.

Were I forced to describe the geography of the Netherlands, I would have to call it "suspiciously flat." I also got to continue my tradition of traveling to foreign countries, seeing literal hundreds of spinning wind turbines all over the place, and seething with jealousy.

Utrecht was a neat, smaller city with a central canal that I wish I had set aside more time for. Felt like a place where you'd actually want to live more than a touristy city.

The Mauritshuis in The Hague is where Vermeer's Girl with a Pearl Earring is located, and you know that before you even get to that room because she's plastered on 99% of everything for sale in the gift shop right at the entrance.

When we drove over the Netherlands-Belgium border, it started getting overcast. These gray skies hung around for four days, and dissipated as soon as we traveled back north on the final day. All of my memories of this country will now have a gray/de-saturated filter on them.

I know Brussels has a reputation of being a run-down or dangerous city among Europeans, but it just felt like a regular American city to me (specifically like the architecture/street layout of Boston with the political importance of Washington DC). Like, I don't know what to tell you, sometimes cities have visible homeless people, unsightly graffiti, and ethnic minority neighborhoods? It's gonna be okay, I promise. Amsterdam felt like Weenie Hut Jr. by comparison.

Going through the European Parliament building was very cool and very well laid-out and informative. Definitely a personal highlight of the trip for me.

The Belgian War Museum kinda just felt like some rich guy's personal collection of artifacts the public shouldn't have had access to? Not a lot of labels explaining what you're looking at in any language.

Belgian chocolate is fine. Not bad, but I mean it's chocolate, that's hard to screw up, you know?

During my research before this trip I kept seeing a general consensus that Bruges is super touristy and sanitized and feels fake and that Ghent was better for a more "authentically" preserved medieval center. I'm glad I opted to go there instead because it exceeded my expectations. Awesome architecture everywhere you turn, way fewer crowds than I expected, and it still felt lived in by modern people rather than a giant open-air museum.

Literally did not see a single physical Euro at all on this trip. Both of these countries are entirely cashless societies, and everyone (both tourists and locals) used chip readers and contactless payment for damn near every interaction. If anything, I saw tons of "Card Only/No Cash" signs and none of the opposite.

[folkloresthings]

NORTHANGER ABBEY — send a muse + your favourite trope and i’ll write a drabble/blurb.

fernando alonso and falling asleep on their partner but it's nando who falls asleep

i love u sm <3 have a great day angel

for the nando podium today 🫶

SLEEPY. ❨ fernando alonso x reader ❩

never in your whole relationship with fernando had there been such an exciting race weekend. the first race back after the summer break and you couldn’t have been happier to accompany fernando to the dutch grand prix. exploring amsterdam, watching every free practice, taking an abundance of photos despite fernando’s protests.

what could you say? you were proud. two weeks spent lounging on a boat in spain, skin sun kissed and days long, you could sense fernando’s itch to get back on the track. you were the most important thing on earth to him, but racing was his element — and he looked so attractive doing it.

“good luck,” you whispered to him just before he got in the car, grasping at the front of his race suit. fernando pressed a doting kiss to your lips, admiring how you looked in the green aston martin jersey.

“see you on the other side,” he whispered back, pecking your nose sweetly before he slipped his helmet on and disappeared onto the track. like always, your blood pressure soared as he rounded each corner on the track; even more so when the rain started to pour on the dutch track.

but he crossed the finish line in P2, his seventh podium that season, and all of the love you had inside for him spilled across the aston martin garage. every engineer and worker in sight hugged you tighter than ever. arm linked in kelly’s, you watched as both boyfriends celebrated their wins. sprayed with champagne, fernando’s eyes found yours down below, and in one look you heard a million words. more clearly, just three.

he must have kissed you fifty times since getting off the podium, not caring what cameras were watching. he was ecstatic, leg bouncing in the car back to the hotel. max had invited everyone out for dinner, as it was his home race, but fernando could barely let you get ready for kissing you.

“nando, we’re going to be late if you don’t let me do my hair,” you giggle against his lips, the weight of his body on top of yours warm and comforting. he groans, slipping his chin into the crook of your neck.

“can we stay here?” he mumbles. “i’m tired. and i can think of better things to do than go out…”

his tone turns suggestive, fingers slipping under the hem of your shirt. you slap at his teasing, shoving your boyfriend off of you with a roll of your eyes. in the reflection of the hotel mirror, his eyes never leave you. god, he was sickeningly in love with you.

“you look beautiful, mi amor,” he murmurs, muffled from the kiss he presses to your temple. dapper in his shirt and trousers, you happily snap a picture for your pleasure and drag him down to the hotel restaurant.

the dinner goes on for hours, full of food and drink and laughter. it’s around half past midnight when some drivers begin to fizzle out and go home, max and charles still ordering shots from the bar. you’re half listening to one of carlos’ stories when you feel a strange weight on your shoulder. tucked into your right hand side, fernando’s head has dropped to sleep on you, his hand still rested on your thigh.

you glance down, trying not to wake your tired boyfriend, and smile fondly. he was wrecked, after a day full of media commitments and congratulations after congratulations. the sight of him was adorable, lips turned downward and eyes gently creased at their sides. you were glad no one else had noticed, for fernando’s sake if nothing else, and gently roused him with a rub of his arm.

“baby? come on, let’s go to bed,” you whisper, and you swear your heart melts inside of you when his droopy eyes raise to yours. he was just adorable, furrowed brows and fingers squeezing at your skin. he nods silently, pulling himself up from the chair. you make your excuses for you both, kissing all of the boys goodbye, before you follow the sleepy fernando to the elevator.

you take his hand, guiding him the right way, and he finally rests against you when you’re inside of the lift. he smells vaguely of his cologne, faded from the long night, your face pressed to his chest as he sways you both gently in your climb to the twentieth floor.

“bed time?” he mumbles, drowsy, stepping out and heading towards your room. you nod in agreement, suppressing a giggle at his tired state. he lets you undress him when you’re safe behind locked doors, slowly and softly undoing every button on his shirt, leaving behind a trail of kisses on the skin underneath.

by the time your own dress is hung up and your makeup removed, he’s out like a light. taking a moment, you stand at the edge of the bed and admire him. his back muscles rippling every time he shifts on the mattress, hair already tousled. somewhere in your stating he wakes, at least you think, grunting and reaching out for you to join.

gladly, you appease him. under the covers, fernando bundles you up in his strong hold and doesn’t let go until morning. and even then, he’s not letting you go too far.

[mita-vittua-olivia]

after a good night of sleep, i can finally attempt to sum up all my thoughts about this year’s euro tour.

i got so, so lucky.

i’m glad i was able to go four times this year (which is three times more than last year) and, as opposed to last year, meet a BUNCH of amazing people. big big shout out to @peri-peri-sauce , @arachn11da , @linkhundr , @the13thdoctorbetterbeginger , @thequeenofgeek , @jaarijani , and everyone else who hung out with me at the queues. you guys only turned this entire experience into what it was, it would have been significantly less fun without you and the not-so-good parts would have affected me even more. i can’t believe i’m saying this, but i would sit on the floor in pouring rain with you again any day.

i felt very at home. i could be unhinged and yap about everything with people who UNDERSTOOD ME. nothing lives up to that feeling.

and of course, my interactions with jere. i’m still a little heartbroken about not being there for the listening session in cologne (basically my home), but so many other things happened that i can’t even be too sad about it. not only did he read out my sign (5€ if you play urheilujätkä) in amsterdam 1 and then ripped the 5€ i gave him, but he apologised in person when i got to meet him afterwards, asked if i was going to be at the second amsterdam gig, and said he might play it then … now guess what happened last night :) in my head it was for me. i also got to give him a bracelet and he actually wore it for the paris gig :,)

last night he stared into my soul twice, once while he was talking and the other time during the people’s champion chorus. i will never forget this, it has become a core memory already.

this euro tour truly was crazy and party. i made so many great memories with so many lovely people, i was given so many prints and stickers and bracelets, and i couldn’t be happier about the great interactions i had with so many people. we made memories that truly bond us together (like standing at the metro station and seeing joost and jere - still shirtless - having a smoke at the back door lmao) and it feels like i’ve known all of you people forever.

thank you for the amazing time i’ve had this october, i will cherish the memories forever <3 see you all next year 💚

[vickyvicarious]

Hello! If I have the timeline right, Van Helsing

Was invited to England to examine Lucy

Saes her odd blood loss symptoms.

Immediately returns to Amsterdam to study and to bring a blood transfusion device

Returns to England find her dying, and with the bite marks prominent. Performs transfusion 1

Goes back to Amsterdam to study specifically about vampires

Orders garlic flowers from a friend

Returns to England to find Lucy dying. Performs transfusion 2.

Garlic flowers delivered. Gives Lucy the garlic flowers.

Leaves for a bit to try to finally get some sleep

This seems mostly correct to me! A couple little notes/dates:

September 2 - Probably gets invite, writes to accept.

September 3 - Arrives, examines Lucy. Notes that she's lost blood without appearing anemic. Already thinking of the possibility of vampires or at least something supernatural - he tells Jack, "This is no jest, but life and death, perhaps more." Returns to Amsterdam to research.

September 6 - Gets urgent telegram recalling him back.

September 7 - Arrives and before even seeing her tells Jack, "I have for myself thoughts at the present. Later I shall unfold to you." The whole corn speech is about waiting till you're certain before being open about your ideas. He's brought his medical bag with everything this time. When he sees her near-death from blood loss, he performs transfusion 1 (Arthur). Notes bite marks. Returns to Amsterdam, saying, "I shall be back as soon as possible. And then we may begin." Tells Jack to stay up guarding her during the night.

September 10 - Returns to England to find Jack asleep and Lucy dying again. Transfusion 2 (Jack). As soon as Jack is well enough to guard her briefly, he goes our for a walk and sends a telegram to order flowers from Vanderpool ("I could hear his voice in the hall, asking the way to the nearest telegraph office."), then returns to stand guard himself overnight.

September 11 - Flowers arrive, he strings them up everywhere. Feels confident enough in their protection that he's excited to get some rest at last: "To-night I can sleep in peace, and sleep I want—two nights of travel, much reading in the day between, and much anxiety on the day to follow, and a night to sit up, without to wink."

September 13* - Returns rested and confident in his treatment, until he learns Mrs. Westenra threw the flowers away. Transfusion 3 (VH). Plans to stay up with Lucy himself for the next two nights.

I think he had suspicions from the very beginning, but it was more that he was open to a supernatural explanation rather than vampires specifically. But the research he did between the 3rd-7th narrowed down his suspects, and after seeing the bite marks he was more certain it was indeed a vampire. He then began further research into specific ways to stop a vampire, while in the meantime calling for a constant guard over her at night.

I think as soon as he figured out a way to counter (7th-10th research), he went right back to England - and was just in time with the second transfusion. It's only then that he orders the flowers to be overnighted to Lucy. He may well have reached out to Vanderpool to confirm that he has them available before this, but his other actions suggest to me that he was rushing back pretty much as soon as he found some viable course of action. He's really been going pretty much without a pause this whole time.

*I think this should be the 12th.

[gretavangroupie]

The Ripe and The Ruin (Chapter 5)

Pairing: Jake Kiszka x Reader, OC x Reader

Word Count: 18.2k

Warnings: Language, Alcohol, Smoking, Angst, Anxiety, Lying, Sexual Themes, Kissing, Unprotected Sex.

Find the Playlist Here: Apple Music | Spotify

A new series in collaboration with my talented co-writer @gretavanmoon.

A/N: Hi everyone! Just popping in to let you know that Jules and I will be taking the next two weeks off of writing so that we can enjoy our upcoming Starcatcher shows! This means that there will not be a new chapter next week or the week after. Hopefully this chapter will hold you over until then, and build a little anticipation...

"Like all good fruit, the balance of life is in the ripe and ruin."

AMSTERDAM, NETHERLANDS

HER POV

Your phone buzzing loudly on the nightstand wakes you in a frenzy, the night sweat making your hair stick to your face. Your eyes pop open to the sound as you roll toward it, reaching for it as quickly as possible. You tap the screen, silencing the alarm that is telling you it’s time to get up and get ready to leave for the airport. You roll back over to find Jake completely out, the sound of the alarm not phasing him in the least. Soft breath is leaving his lips, a faint snore rattling around in his chest as his hand rests softly on the edge of your pillow. 

You admire the softness of his features, how smooth his lips are, and the way his hair is fanning over his face. Your eyes travel over his shoulder and down his body until it disappears beneath the white sheets, the covers hanging low on his waist. You can feel his legs tangled with yours and it almost feels sinful to pull them away. The room is still a little dark, the sun just barely risen as it starts to peek through the curtains in the room. You know that you have an hour until you have to be downstairs with your suitcase, so you make the painful decision to pull yourself away from him. 

You gently untangle your legs from his and slide out of the soft, warm bed, unnoticed. You tiptoe into the bathroom and shut the door behind you, letting out the breath you were holding. You turn on the light and look at yourself in the mirror, seeing your streaked and smudged makeup and your disheveled hair. You take a minute to clean yourself up, running your fingers through your hair and gargling with the hotel mouthwash. You pee and wash your hands, turning off the light and quietly opening the door to sneak back into the room. 

As you walk back towards the bed you see Jake is awake, and leaning up on his elbows. You can tell he had just woken, a panicked look in his tired eyes. You stop just short of the bed, looking at him as he takes in the sight of you in his t-shirt. 

“Morning,” you smile, biting your lips together. 

A deep hum comes from his chest as his face softens, “Mmm, thought you snuck out on me, come get back in bed.”

Maybe five more minutes won’t hurt…

You walk around the front of the bed, watching him pull the sheets back to welcome you back into the warm cloud of luxury linens. 

“I wouldn’t just leave without saying anything,” you pause, “I thought you knew me better than that.”

He pulls you into him, wrapping the blankets around your back as he positions your head on his shoulder, humming deeply as he feels your body on his again. He lets out a content sigh, letting his fingers trace circles into your back. 

“I’d like to think I know you inside and out, now,” he quips. 

“Oh shut up, that's gross, it is seven in the morning,” you laugh, digging your fingers into his ribs. 

He runs his nose along your hairline as he laughs, “Did you sleep okay?”

“Apart from your snoring, yes…” you smile, moving the hair off of his face. 

He furrows his brows, “Snoring? If I was snoring I need to call my surgeon back, he was supposed to fix that.”

“I’m kidding. Kinda, you were snoring a tiny tiny bit when I got up, but I didn’t hear you all night,” you admit. 

“You’re up early…”

“My alarm woke me, we have to be downstairs and ready to get to the airport in like, forty-five minutes,” you say.

“Off to Paris…” he says, letting out a relaxed sigh. His eyes meet yours as a smile pulls across his lips. “You excited?”

“Actually yeah, I haven’t ever been,” you answer, letting your eyes linger on his lips. 

“Well, I hate to be the one to tell you this, but it’s kinda shitty and dirty. But if you know the right places to go it can be fun, and the food is pretty good. I can make you a little cheat sheet, we have two days off while we’re there if you want me to show you a few places, oh actually there's this really fantastic restaurant I’m gonna take you to, you’ll love it,” he says, the words flowing out of his mouth before he could stop them. 

“Oh, you’re gonna take me?” you tease. 

“Yeah, I’ve earned another date, right?” he asks, rubbing his thumb over your bottom lip. 

“I think I’d like that,” you answer, kissing his thumb. “But, in order to do all of that, we have to get to Paris, which means we have to get up and I have to go back to my room and pack.”

“I know, I know. I just…” he pauses, his eyes flicking around your face, as he leans his face towards yours, “I’m glad you gave me another chance. Last night was…”

“I know…Me too,” you whisper, leaning into him. His lips meet yours, soft and warm, effectively quieting every loud thought screaming through your mind. He sucks your bottom lip into his mouth, pulling it away from your mouth just slightly before releasing it with a pop. His hand grips at your face, the evidence of his arousal pressing against your stomach as you whine. Suddenly it stops, and he pulls his lips from yours as he looks at you. 

“You are…incredible,” he smiles, “That should hold me over for a little while. At least until later.”

“Don’t get greedy on me now, Jake,” you taunt, slipping out of the sheets. 

You grab your dress from the floor and make a show of pulling his white t-shirt over your head. His eyes are trained on you as you stand naked in front of him, your chest bare and your nipples hard as his eyes zero in on them. 

“Come back to bed,” he begs. 

“Nope,” you laugh, pulling your dress over your head and sliding into your boots. “I can give you another kiss though.”

“Mmhm, mhmm, yeah, yeah, just… come over here…” he says, hoping to lure you back into the bed. 

You grab your phone and your purse and sling it over your shoulder as you kneel onto the bed where his perfect and desperately hot body is craving you beneath the sheets. You lean over and press your lips to his one more time as his hand slides up the back of your thigh. Just before it lands where he wants it to, you pull away and smooth out your dress. 

“See you downstairs in thirty?” you ask playfully. 

“Five more minutes,” he barters. 

“Later…” you pause, “Maybe.”

“Temptress,” he growls from his place in the bed.  

You nod and start to head towards the door catching his eyes one more time. “Just for you.”

JAKE POV

One last breath of the sheets that hold the smell of her perfume, and you’re regretfully pulling yourself from the mess of blankets to get ready for the day. Travel days are always a little restful, but at times can be more chaotic than anything. The one thing that will get you through today, though, is knowing that you’ll soon be visiting one of the most romantic cities on earth, with the new flame that’s entered your life in a whirlwind.

You stressfully cram all your things into your suitcase, making a mental note to visit the laundry room at the next hotel. The frantic nature of last night had the thought of packing up your stuff at the very end of your list of things to accomplish; taking care of the woman in your bed seemed to be just a bit more important than making sure you didn’t forget your toothbrush. 

Time is ticking, and you know you have mere minutes before you need to be downstairs. Then, like a flood of bad memories, you remember the texts that Isla sent you last night, rushing back to your already overstimulated brain. 

“Fuck. Fuck!!!” you shout just loudly enough to startle yourself, and you button the button on your jeans before unplugging your phone from the charger, balling the cord up in your fist. You bring up Isla’s text string, seeing all of the “horrible” things she had seen on Danny’s story be read back to you in real time. She always did have an eagle eye, noticing things that happened in the background before she ever really saw what was happening right in front of her. Ironic, really. You run your hand over your face as you hop up to quickly brush your teeth and finish packing. What do you even say? How do you even answer those texts? She isn’t wrong, but… she’s also most definitely not right. 

You have to call her. Let her bitch. Let her yell and scream like she always does, give her a half-assed explanation, and tell her that Josh had you to accompany the new runner on an errand. That’s what you’ll do. Why the anticipation of the phone call is giving you anxiety, you don’t really know. It’s fucked that she makes you feel this way. You wish she would just take the fucking hint, and get out of your house.

You try to shake the thoughts from your mind as you do a one-over of the room, making sure you haven’t left anything behind. Something catches the corner of your eye, a pile of red fabric tucked up underneath the bedskirt. You rush over and pick it up, finding it to be exactly what you suspected, Y/N’s red lace thong. She must have slipped it off in her sleep. You grin to yourself as you get a flashback of last night, seeing her ass and back so perfectly arched for you, the red lace standing out in the shadowy darkness of the room. 

You stuff it in the hidden inside pocket of your jacket, fully ready to give it back to her at the most appropriate time… or maybe not. 

You grab the handle of your suitcase and begin rolling it to the door, pulling your phone out to make the phone call that you’re absolutely dreading. You expect Isla to answer on the first ring, but when she doesn’t, and the third and fourth rings let you know she most likely isn’t going to answer, you feel a ginormous weight lifted directly off your shoulders. You tried. Not your fault she didn’t answer and you were getting directly on a plane. 

You finally make your way out of the lobby and to the vans parked out on the side lot, seeing that most everyone is taking their sweet time getting here this morning. You greet Paul and Danny and Corri, your eyes scanning around to see if you’ll catch a glimpse of Y/N in the bright orange morning sunlight. And of course, just as you lift your suitcase into the back of the van, she’s skirting around the one parked in front, her eyes trained on her phone in her hand. 

You pull your sunglasses over your eyes, watching her preoccupied self lift her heavy bag into the van while still trying to accomplish whatever it is she’s doing on her phone. She hasn’t seen you yet, and you admit you’ve got a little bit of nerves in your stomach. You’re watching how the sun is hitting her hair, how her facial expressions draw up and down as she tries to read through what you know is a million emails, and how she juts her hip out to one side as she tosses her heavy carry-on across her neck.

She’s really, really pretty. And you swear, she doesn’t even know it. 

Suddenly you feel Sam’s hands on your shoulders, shaking you back and forth with force. “Top of the morning, brother! What are you standing there dumbfounded for? Thought Lyla and I would be fighting you for the backseat…”

You get yourself together, blinking rapidly as Sam breaks you from your awe-stricken stare. You hope he didn’t see where your direct line of vision was pointed. 

“Oh, you guys can have it, no big deal,” you reply, hopping into the open door and finding your place in one of the center seats. 

You see Sam’s face turn up in surprised disgust. “Uh, thanks? Are you okay?” 

It’s no secret that the backseat of the van always either belongs to you, or to Sam and Lyla. Just the way it has always been. But today, you’re feeling a little generous. “Yeah, I’m alright I guess. Why?”

Had amazing mind-blowing sex last night… I’m on cloud 9, Sam. 

“Just weird of you to give up your seat so willingly when we normally fistfight for it, that’s all…” Sam replies with suspicion in his voice. 

If I can keep this mood going, you can have the backseat for the rest of tour, I don’t give a fuck.

“Yeah… well don’t get used to it.”

—-

You’d learned the plane ride would thankfully end up being extremely short, and you found yourself seated with Josh and Ty rather than beside Y/N again. You did manage to catch her eyes a handful of times in the airport, though, each time making her fight off a smile while her face turned pink. Keeping things between you a bit of a secret is proving to be a little tedious, but again, it has only been a few days. Sneaking around with her is adding a whole new bit of excitement to your life, something completely unexpected and away from your norm. She’d ended up seated a few rows behind you on the plane, so you’d busied yourself with watching YouTube videos and mindless reel scrolling to pass the time.

Just as you are in the middle of watching someone restring a harp, your phone lights up with a text from her. 

Y/N

9:14AM: Don’t tell me that’s you I hear snoring up there…

You chuckle as you remember her jokes from this morning in bed. 

You

9:15AM: That would be my brother. Sheesh, picking on me again, are you?

Y/N

9:15AM: It’s kinda fun to :) What does your day look like?

9:16AM: I mean, I could look at your itinerary, but I’d rather you just tell me.

Your heart warms at that, for some reason.

You

9:16AM: Heading straight for soundcheck as soon as we land, then some other pre show shit. What about you?

Y/N

9:18AM: Ahhh, that’s probably why I have to get all of the suitcases to your rooms then…

You

9:20AM: Don’t be snooping around in my stuff now…

Y/N

9:21AM: I slept in your shirt last night Jake. Don’t think I need to snoop...

You

9:22AM: You’re right. If I had my way, you’d be wearing my clothes day and night

Just then the pilot comes over the speaker, letting everyone know it’s time to land. Your conversation is cut short, but at least you know that you had been on her mind, too. You want to see what she has to say, want to know what she would have responded with, but for now, it has to wait. As the plane descends, you’re wondering why Isla never texted you back, but you chalk it up to the time difference, and maybe she is wanting to avoid you a little after her outburst last night.

Or maybe she realized she overreacted. Probably not. 

As the morning turns into the chaos of making it to the venue, your mind gets occupied with thoughts of nothing but the show. You go full-force professional, drowning yourself in your work and making sure things are running tightly with the sound of your music. You and your brothers spend the next bit of time doing your duties, and you even take some time to go over a few things with your guitar tech Johnny to check in on the state of your precious babies. 

For the first time in a while, your mind is at complete ease. You’re laughing. You’re smiling. You can almost feel the serotonin coursing through your veins, and the overall calmness settle in over your entire being. A sly look from Josh tells you that he can tell you’re glowing; it must be obvious in your aura that you had a really good night with Y/N. You finally feel like you can exhale completely without the burden of the Isla situation looming over you like a black cloud. 

For the first time in nearly a year, you get the feeling that everything is going to be okay. You feel in charge of your life, and your decisions. None of the bullshit matters. The phone call from Chris yesterday is just the icing on the cake. A brand new air of confidence has overtaken you, and the realization that you’re a grown man who can make your own decisions further outweighs the burden of the woman who is, for lack of a better term, leeching at all the life you have left. 

…That is, until your phone begins buzzing in your pocket. Fuck. Just had to think it.

You remorsefully pull it from your pocket, already knowing that you’re going to find her contact name and photo of the two of you lighting up your screen. You huff in aggravation when you find just that. 

“Gonna go to the restroom, be right back,” you announce to everyone as you quickly slip down the metal stairs and to the bathrooms backstage. You prep yourself, ready to have the conversation that you’ve had so many times before. 

“Hello?” you answer with an intentional sound of breathlessness in your voice, making yourself seem busier than you actually are.

“Jake…” Isla says. 

You push into the bathroom, glancing under the stalls to find that you have the place to yourself. 

“Hey, what’s up?” you say, wandering into the handicapped stall so you can pace in private. 

“What’s up? What’s up?! Did you not get my texts last night? What the fuck is going on, Jake? Where did you go with that girl?” Isla begins to raise her voice. “I saw you two leaving on Danny’s story, you were in a rush, Jake, walking her out the door.”

“Isla, Isla listen to me, will you just let me talk? Damn!” you retaliate. “She is our new runner.”

“Yeah I fuckin’ saw that, Jake. I found her Instagram.” You roll your eyes, because of course she did. 

“Josh needed her to go on an errand to get him something last night, and it was really really late. Dean had to stay back with everyone else because there were some fans hanging around, so I walked her down the street to the store. That’s it.” You know you’re lying. The guilt of hearing yourself say it all out loud hits you in the gut. But there’s no way in hell you’re telling her anything remotely close to the truth. She doesn’t deserve it, really. You don’t owe her shit at this point.

“Ok so why didn’t Josh go by himself? Or why didn’t he go with her, instead of you?” she presses. Here comes the digging. 

“Because he and Ty had had like 5 shots of tequila a piece and they were taking care of each other. He knew he would be feeling like hell this morning, and he was out of his tea or some shit, so he made her a list of things he needed. Fuck, I don’t know, you know how he is. I stayed outside…” 

She stays silent for a second as she runs over your explanation. Ok, maybe this is working. 

“You’re a horrible liar, Jacob. You always have been…” her words are quiet and exhausted, and they hit you like a dagger, for some reason. It isn’t so much what she said, but how she said it. And, for the fact that you know in your heart of hearts that this is probably the very first lie you’ve ever told her. In three years. What else did she think you had lied about?

“I’m not lying, Isla,” your words taste like sour poison in your mouth as you lean your elbow onto the stall wall, resting your forehead on your arm. 

“You might not be lying, but you’re sure as hell not telling me the whole truth. Are you seeing her, Jake?” she asks, her voice rising again. “Because it feels like I need to say something to he–”

“Isla, please! For the love of god! You do not need to say something to her, please stop with that! She was just doing her job!” you feel defensive. 

She scoffs. “Ya know, you’ve changed, Jake. Something isn’t the same with you anymore…”

“Oh, you think?!” you yell, pushing yourself off of the wall. “Isla, open your eyes! We haven’t been good in almost a year, do you not realize that?! We fight, we argue, we can’t stand the sight of each other sometimes! Did you not even notice when I would spend days at a time staying with Sam and Josh?”

She stays quiet, but you feel like the words that you’ve been wanting to say for a while now are finally bubbling to the surface with ease. “I…I’ve tried to break this off countless times, Isla. You can’t tell me you are ignoring that altogether. I’ve asked you multiple times to please find somewhere else to live.”

“You agreed that we would go on a break…”

“God Isla, don’t you remember that night? The night before I left… it was fucking 4AM, neither of us had slept, I was getting on a plane in like two hours… you were crying, I was crying, we were fighting horribly. I couldn’t even get out of my damn house unless I agreed to your terms,” you argued, recounting one of the worst nights of your entire life.

“So you seem to have forgotten that we had sex that night, too, huh?” she spouts. Fuck. You leaned back onto the wall, banging the outside of your fist against it. 

“We slept together before the fight, Isla. Remember?”

“So how are you going to have sex with me, then tell me you want to break up in the same night?” she cries. 

“We’ve gone through that exact scenario like ten times! It’s just… It just happens, I guess…!” you shake your head as the memory floods back. One thing that you and Isla never ever had a problem with was your sex life. Things could be rocky as hell between you, fights and arguments all over the place, but somehow, your bodies always craved each other when your hearts didn’t. It never made any sense. Mad sex happened often, but you never had make-up sex. It was always good, really really good, but toward the end, the love had faded and was replaced solely by your need for physical pleasure. 

Half the time, when you found yourselves wrapped up in one another after a fight, you’d get the realization that the situation was completely unhealthy and an unnatural thing to do, but it was what it was. An endless cycle. She’d throw on her tears, and you’d fall for it. Every. Single. Time. 

Until now. Well, the past couple of months, at least. You’d become so exhausted of your life with her that you could hardly live with yourself anymore. Sure, you still loved her, and still do, in some weird, fucked up way, but practicality and maturity had come into play lately, and you’d decided that if you were going to move forward with your life, you had to make a decision. And your decision didn’t include her. 

“Jake,” her voice gets quiet and solemn again.

“What?” you fuss. 

“Do you remember the first time you told me you loved me?”

Your head falls backward as you let your eyes roll. Of course you remember. 

“Yeah, what about it?” you answer with annoyance. 

“We had too many margaritas on our first date. Decided to walk home, took the scenic route, you were so giddy drunk you told me you loved me, right then and there in the middle of the street. On our first date. And… you didn’t even regret it the next morning,” she recounted that summer night some three-odd years ago.

You close your eyes… if only you knew then…

“Yeah. I remember,” you say, biting your lips. 

“What changed?” Suddenly her tone feels sincere, like she wasn’t completely present for the downfall of your relationship. 

You bite your cheeks in as you pace around the stall, avoiding the dirty tiles as the fluorescent light above you blinks on and off. 

“I dunno, I guess we just… grew apart. Wanting different things… my life did a 180 really, really quickly…” you shy away from adding the part that you really want to say, that she turned into a whole different person than the one you fell in love with in the middle of the street that night. What once was the best thing that ever happened to you has turned into a person who only cares to be seen with you when there are fans taking pictures, or when she can show you off simply for the fame that you’ve acquired, not for the person that you actually are. “I grew up a lot, Isla. I want different things, now. And I’m sorry, I really, really am. How things have worked out…” You feel a lump begin to swell at the back of your throat as you hear her crying on the other end.

“You told me I was it for you…” she says after a few beats, sending your heart straight to your stomach again. 

“I know. I know I did. But–”

“Do you love me at all anymore, Jake? Like, even just a little? Is there any chance that…” she sniffles. 

You hold strong, though swallowing the lump in your throat is harder than you thought it’d be. “I don’t think that there is, Isla… I’m… we’ve been apart for so long now that I…I’ve realized things. Even more clearly than I did before…”

“So you’re just gonna throw everything away, all that we built together…I…I’m not willing to throw everything away, Jake…” Just as her sentence ends, your reception becomes spotty, and you hear her voice cut in and out. 

“Isla, I can’t hear you. Hey…I don’t have good service… I’ll… Hello?” You hold your phone in the air as you watch your two bars go down to none, and the call hangs itself up. 

“Fuck…” you breathe, feeling a flood of emotions taking over you. You hate this. You truly do. You hate lying to her. You hate lying to anyone in general, it’s not who you are. But in your mind, things were so far gone with Isla when you left, and you were so earth-shatteringly pissed off and tired of the back and forth, that you agreed to her “break” with the impression that she wouldn’t speak to you while you were gone. That she wouldn’t make an effort to know your every move, and would try to find herself somewhere else to live, so that way when you returned home, you could have your own space to recollect and cool off without her there. Only then could you finally discuss things like adults, cut your ties, and move on with your lives. 

…But she just didn’t. 

And you didn’t expect to feel so free without her hanging on your every action. 

And you didn’t expect Y/N.

You shove the stall door open, finding none other than your twin sitting cross-legged on the countertop, his chin balanced on his fists. 

“Fuck, Josh, you scared me. How long have you been–”

“Long enough. I didn’t mean to eavesdrop, I just…came to make sure you’re okay. You’ve been “peeing” for fifteen minutes, now,” he jokes, hopping off the counter. You both stand and stare at each other for a few seconds, and you can tell that he’s absorbing your pain, a little bit. Letting himself understand the predicament you’re in. “You’re really in a fucked up spot, aren’t you?”

You let out a sigh, turning to lean against the counter beside him. “Yeah. Yeah, fuck, I am.” You run your hand through your hair as you turn on the cold water, letting your hands sit underneath the running faucet before patting the icy water onto your eyes. “Guess this guilt trip is what I get for being too good of a person. I could tell Isla that I fucking hate her and I never want to see or hear from her ever again, block her number, and tell her to kick rocks. But…”

“But she still lives with you…” Josh finishes. 

“Yeah. And I’m not home to kick her out onto the street. Not like I would, anyway…” you go on. 

“You still have a soft spot for her, don’t you?” Josh asks, crossing his arms over his chest. 

You shrug, not sure how to answer. “I don’t think it’s a soft spot. It’s… It’s more like, a habit. A normalcy. We’d become so accustomed to each other and our routines and patterns that we just… don’t really know how to separate. Does that make sense?”

Josh nods. “You’re saying ‘we’.

You shake your head as you flip the faucet off. “You know what I mean. This trip, this tour so far, has seriously put things into perspective for me. With my standpoint on things. But, it doesn’t make it any easier to face.”

Josh takes a deep breath as the two of you make your way to the door. “I get it. I get it… I think you should stick with your guns, though. I’ve never seen you so upbeat as you have been today. Not in a long while, at least. It’s like you’re finally free, or something.”

“Or it could be because I got my redemption with Y/N last night…” you counter. 

“OHHHH did you?! Well, it all makes sense now!” he yells a little bit too loudly as you walk back through the hall to the stage. “Means you’re gonna be a fuckin’ animal on stage tonight, then, god damnit.”

The two of you laugh and shove each other’s bodies into the cold block walls, and the phone call with Isla suddenly falls to the very back of your mind, just as quickly as it had come. 

HER POV

“Sure you’ve got all that?” Corri asks as she hands the staff and crew keycards. 

“Yeah, I’ll just make a few trips, it’s no big deal!” you reply as you roll the guys’ suitcases into a corner to hide behind the front desk of the hotel. 

“I’m so sorry, I’d help but I’ve gotta run…” she smiles and waves as she answers her phone, already in a hurry as she rushes back out the door. 

“No worries!” you wave back as you sort out the key cards in your hand. You find the card for your own room first, deciding to go ahead and drop your own things off before worrying about theirs. Once inside, you make quick work of dropping all your bags onto the bed, taking notice of the view outside your window. You have to peek around the corner of the brick building to catch the tiniest glimpse of the Eiffel Tower, but still yet, the actual proximity of it is astounding. You feel a jolt of excitement run through you as you realize you’ll get to visit it soon. You snap a quick photo of it, sending it away to Ruth before heading back downstairs. 

“Okay, Josh, you’re up first, sir. 603, 603…” You take the handle of his suitcase in your hand and make your way to the elevators again.

You make the multiple trips up and down to make sure the belongings are delivered safely. Jake’s things happen to be last up, and you laugh to yourself that it just happened to be that way. “412…” you mutter to yourself as you make your fourth and final trip up the elevators. As you wait for it to ascend, you take a second to look at his luggage, plain black and worn-in around the edges with an old brown leather keychain hanging from the handle. Attached to the keychain is what looks like the stringed remnants of what was once a white knotted bracelet of some kind, but the edges are so frayed and torn up that you can hardly tell if it was a bracelet or just a bunch of woven string. 

The elevator dings, and you pull the last remaining card from your back pocket. You make your way down to room 412, using the card to open the heavy door in front of you. In the others’ rooms, you left the suitcases by the beds, but in Jake’s you take a second to lift it onto the shelf for him, turning it so all he will have to do is unzip, and flip it open. For a second, you contemplate snooping a little, but you’re scared that he would notice. Instead, you walk to the window, pulling the metal ball chain to open the blinds. The window goes from floor to ceiling, and after the blinds are pulled all the way, you can see the Tower in all its beauty, standing broad and proud in its entirety. 

“Wow…” you breathe, pulling the window handle and realizing that it is in fact a sliding door to a small balcony. 

Again, you pull your phone out and set it to a .5 zoom, able to get the entire tower in the frame. You attach the photo to a message to Jake. 

You

11:49AM: Your view of the Eiffel Tower is a lot better than the view from my room, I must say…

You watch your phone for a minute or so before you see his text bubble pop up, sending excitement rolling through your nervous system. 

Jake

11:51AM: So stay in mine tonight

“Oh my god…” you whisper as you feel your face get hot. You’re smiling like a giddy child, realizing that he wants to see you again. You wiggle your fingers above your phone as you decide on how to reply. Could this be becoming a regular thing? You want to lay it on heavy, because why not? 

You

11:53AM: Already wanting round 3 this soon, hm?

Jake

11:54AM: And 4 and 5 and 6

You

11:54AM: You better be careful Jake, wouldn’t want to spoil yourself with too much of a good thing ;)

Jake

11:55AM: Baby haven’t you noticed I’m the overindulgent type?

11:55AM: Spoiling myself is what I do best

You feel your body getting heated as you realize he is really into you. He wants to indulge himself in you. 

You

11:56AM: Didn’t realize I was this craveable to you

Jake

11:57AM: Like I said, hardly a clean thought in days

You slide your phone back into your pocket as you realize you have things to do today, and you can’t be spending your time borderline sexting with your boss. You fan away the redness from your face and close the blinds back up, heading back out into the hall. 

As the door latches behind you, you notice Mia, Lyla, and Ty standing out in the hallway talking. 

“Oh, hey girl!” Lyla says. “Thanks for getting all their stuff in the rooms, you off to fill the rider?” She crosses her arms across her chest as Mia dons a snarky smile, waiting for your answer all the same. 

“Yep! Heading to the venue to get the print-off now, but we have a meeting first. What are you guys gonna do today?” You ask, trying to seem busy with digging around in your shoulder satchel. 

“Mmm, I dunno…” Lyla goes on. “Maybe explore a little bit. Hey, did you manage to get everything for Josh last night? Saw you and Jake slide out of the hotel bar last night, then we never saw you again…” She shrugs her shoulders like she’s innocently asking, but you catch onto her antics quickly. You’d been noticing their suspicions for the past couple of days, and now they are out in full force. She looks to Mia who raises her eyebrows in question, as well. 

“Yeah, you guys just… disappeared. Together.” Mia adds. You hear Ty scoff as he leans his shoulder on the wall. 

You swallow hard as you readjust your stance. “Yeah, Josh gave me a list of things that he needed when he realized he was too intoxicated to make a trip down to the store, Dean stayed back to keep an eye out for you guys and that hoard of people standing by the exit. Jake was sober, so he walked with me. Then we split ways and went to our rooms,” you explain. You don’t really know why you’re lying to them, Jake even said he isn’t worried about getting into trouble… but why are they acting so interested in what you’re doing, anyway? It’s not their business…

Lyla and Mia both look at Ty for confirmation as he ignores the situation and scrolls his phone, giving them a small nod to let them know that yes, that was the story.

“Hm, cute,” Mia says, kicking her shoe into the carpet. “Hero Jake saves the day again. Things will change real quick when I–”

“They went to the store for me, okay?” Ty interrupts her. “I needed Pepto fucking Bismol, BAD, okay? Do you think I wanted to ask Dean for that?? That’s embarrassing as hell and I didn’t care that Jake knew. Fuck! You bitches are so nosy, I swear to god…” Ty scoffs again as he leans back onto the wall. “Can we go get breakfast now before I eat my fucking hand?”

Ty. Your hero. 

Lyla furrows her brow together as she gives you a quick up-down. What is going on? What switched up all of a sudden? Yesterday, everything felt fine with them, now your gut is telling you that they’re indifferent toward you. 

“Yep,” Lyla says. “Let’s go. See you later, Y/N? Meet up for lunch?” They don’t even wait for you to accept the offer before loading into the elevator one by one, leaving you standing in the empty hallway alone. You quickly catch eyes with Ty as the doors begin to close, and you watch as he winks at you, letting you know your suspicions of Mia and Lyla knowing your little secret are real. 

But then again, their suspicions are very real, too.  

—---

A little later, you all load into the van to head to the venue, and you know you will have exactly an hour after this meeting to hit the store and fill the rider before you need to be back for set-up. Your palms break out into a sweat as you realize today is going to be extra-rushed with the addition of the meeting that’s been sprung into the middle of things, but, the new security has arrived, and management wants them to meet with everyone before the show to do formal introductions. 

“Hey, scoot over,” Ty says as he slides into the bench seat beside you, two paper coffee cups in hand. “I got you this, I don’t know what you like, so I just got you what I like,” he says, handing you the second cup. 

“Oh my god, Ty, that’s so nice of you, thank you! You didn’t have to do that,” you gush, giving him a happy pout as you take the cup from his hand. He shrugs you off like it’s no big deal, adjusting himself in the seat as it pulls from the hotel parking lot. You can see why Josh is so taken with Ty, he’s the kind of guy that grabs your attention immediately, his relaxed body language and nonchalant attitude only add to his striking looks. His eyes are a bright green, almost like a peridot, and when he speaks, he hardly makes eye contact, always looking around as if he’s more nervous than he’s leading on. But then, his kindness shows up as confidence, making him all the more intriguing as a person. 

“No big deal, I have two hands,” he laughs, pulling up the hood of his oversized black hoodie. You notice the white emblem on the front of it, a wild looking mess of pine trees and other designs with some type of words intertwined in the branches of the pines. 

You take a sip of the hot coffee, the perfect balance of cream and sugar mixed with the bitter flavor of the drip. “Hey, what’s on your hoodie?” you ask.

His black fingernails yank down on the pocket of the hoodie, stretching out the material so you can get a better look. “Oh, this is my brother’s band. This hoodie is old as fuck…” he motions to the worn-in rips around the cuffs of the sleeves, and the tear in the pocket. 

“Oh, cool! Are they still playing?” you ask.

“They still get together every now and then, but, they’ve mostly moved on with their lives. I used to design the merch and do their visuals and shit. Feels like a lifetime ago…” he goes on, taking a long drink of his coffee.

“That’s really neat, Ty. Do you miss doing that kind of thing?” you ask. 

“Yeah, I do, actually. I went to school for graphic design, worked for a nightclub in college helping out the back of house mix and lights, just fucking around and learning. Their band used to play there a lot, kind of became their House band, I guess. It was wild times, really,” he reminisces, smiling to himself. 

“So you are accustomed to how things work for Josh and the band, then, huh?” you say.

He nods. “Oh yeah. Definitely. Kinda miss it, honestly.”

“Is that how you met Josh?” you feel confident enough to ask. 

He stifles a tight smile. “No. No, we met a long long time ago,” he sings. “Was a different lifetime, back then. Just happened to find him again at the right time…” 

You smile at his story, knowing that now is not the time to press any further on the subject, so you decide to change it. 

“Hey, thanks for… ya know. This morning, in the hall…” you nudge him in the arm and speak quietly as Mia and Lyla are sitting two rows ahead of you. “I–”

“You don’t have to thank me, babe. And you don’t have to explain anything, either,” he keeps his eyes trained straight ahead, speaking just above a whisper as his lips hit the lid of his coffee cup. 

You nod, your mind traveling back to what Mia had said. ‘Things will change real quick…’ What did that even mean? You push it away, instead focusing on your job duties and going over the notes that were sent out in an email this morning. The van pulls into the venue backlot and parks in a corner away from view. 

“Shit,” Paul exclaims from the front seat. “We’ve gotta hurry, or we’re gonna miss this meeting!” Everyone quickly makes their way into the building to gather for directions.

“See you later, ma,” Ty says as he rushes off toward the other van to find Josh. 

“Yeah, thanks again for the coffee!” you answer. As you follow Paul, Wes, and Corri inside, you catch a quick glimpse of Jake grouped with the rest of the guys and their partners, and he flashes you the sweetest glance, holding it for just long enough to make your nerves swim.

A few rushed minutes later, you gather with the rest of management and a few members of the crew in a small room with a large table. “Can’t believe we made it on time,” Corri mumbles as she pulls her laptop from her bag. “That traffic was awful!”

Just then, Dean comes in the door, leading a group of two men and one woman behind him. You take them all in, realizing that these three must be the new security personnel. They all have a professional, focused demeanor, eyes already laser-focused on making eye contact with each person in the room. 

“Morning, everyone! Sorry about throwing this meeting on you at the last minute, but our newest security has arrived a few days ahead of schedule, thankfully, and we wanted to introduce everyone,” Paul stands and addresses the room. “Dean?”

Dean steps forward as the other three stand behind him. “Good morning everyone, as most of you know, the band has asked us to add a few more bodies onto the security team, and luckily we were able to find this excellent outfit to spare their time to come to Europe with us. I just wanna thank Paul and Corri for finding them, and giving me a few extra sets of eyes while I do my job to the best of my ability… and I’m looking forward to working with them. So, Murph, take it away.”

You watch as the youngest of the three steps forward, a handsome, muscular man with a high and tight haircut and chinstrap beard. He’s not very tall, but taller than Dean, and his brown eyes are the first thing you take notice of. His arms are littered with tattoos that perfectly showcase his muscular build, disappearing beneath the sleeve of his shirt.

“Thank you Dean, hello everyone, uh my name’s Murph, I’m the lead of this particularly impressive group of individuals behind me. This is Sasha, and this is Monty. We’re very excited to be joining you all as we travel through Europe. Just a little bit about us, uh, each of us is highly trained in the field of security and guard, each of us has over ten years under our belts in this service. After various full careers, we’ve each trained at the same facility for the past, what, six years now?” he goes on, glancing behind him to his teammates. They nod. 

“Dean will still be your head of operations, but the four of us will work hand-in-hand with the systems and protocols that Dean already has in place for your protection. We will be working closely with venue security to make sure everyone stays on the same page day-of. Our number one priority is safety and risk management, as well as emergency response plans to ensure that safety. We do realize that chaos is the nature of live events such as these shows, and that’s the name of the game, so we pride ourselves in being proactive, and we’ll appreciate your understanding of our protocols.”

Murph stands with his hands clasped together, hanging below his waist. You notice that he makes eye contact with everyone, and his demeanor is competent and experienced. He’s very well spoken but laid back, and he smiles at the end of every sentence. He seems sincere, like every bone in his body was formed to do this job, and he talks about his profession like he was born for it. 

“Anyways, as time passes you’ll notice we are very much ‘no-questions-asked’, and our processes are strict and straight-forward. Uhm, we look forward to being here, and please, we don’t bite, we’re all friendly characters who look forward to meeting each and every one of you on this tour.” On his last word, his eyes land on you, giving you the slightest smirk. 

Oh? Did you see that right? Did your mind make that up? He’s…oh.

Murph steps back in line with his cohorts as Corri follows up. “Thanks, Murph. We’re very excited to have you on board. Guys, any questions, comments?” She addresses the staff. 

One gentleman from management that you aren’t very familiar with speaks up. “So I’m not sure any of us have had security follow us around so closely before… will you be accompanying us everywhere?”

Murph rubs his hand across his nose before he speaks again, leaning his arms down on the back of an empty chair. You watch as his pecs and biceps flex under his tight black t-shirt, sending your heart rate into a frenzy. Fuck, he is HOT. 

“Good question, uhm, it’s not our intention to make you feel like you’re being followed by us, please understand. Dean is only one guy, and while I’m more than positive he does his job extremely well, we’re here to quadruple his efforts. So no, we will not escort every person to every outing, or whatever the case may be, our sights will be set on the band members of course, given their faces will be the ones standing out in the crowds. We’ve been specially trained in crowd and fan control, which again will be our main concerns. But please, if you at any time feel unsafe or want an extra set of eyes in any particular place, we are a phone call away. At all times. Please just know we are simply doing what we’re hired to do,” he finishes.

Your heart is beating fast. Why is your heart beating fast? Like really fast… it needs to stop. Slow down. You realize after a few seconds of staring at his lips and the way his jaw moves that you have absolutely no fucking idea what he just said. Shit. Shittttttt. No. Did he have an accent? He had an accent, you think. Southern, maybe? Don’t know, but there was a little bit of a drawl…

“Ok! Well if no one else has any questions, guess we can all get to it! Busy day today everyone, I’ve emailed you all Murph, Sasha, and Monty’s contact info, please feel free to call or text them if you need anything at all. They will also stay on channel 5 of your walkies,” Paul says as he stands from the table. You shake away your intrusive thoughts that came out of fucking nowhere as everyone around you stands and makes their way to the door.

As you stand, you feel light-headed, like you are dizzy, standing on a rocking boat in the middle of the ocean. Did you just swoon? Over a man you don’t know? His assertiveness, his no-nonsense attitude laced with some type of hospitality you’ve never encountered before… his…muscles…

You feel your phone buzz in your pocket, letting the feeling pull you back to reality. As your eyes scan the screen a warm feeling fills your chest, and pushes away the swirling floaty feeling. 

‘Jake Added A Song to Your Shared Playlist: 🐥’

You can’t help the smile pulling across your face, quickly biting your lips together as you tap on the notification. The playlist loads as you scroll to the bottom, seeing the song he added only minutes ago, ‘Thinking About You’ by Beck. 

He’s thinking about you. About last night…

Your brain steers you on autopilot as you walk down the hall, your mind replaying each and every glorious moment from last night on repeat. Every touch, every sound. You let out a sigh as you stop and lean against the cool white brick wall, deciding that if you were going to make your move, it had to be now or never. You quickly type in the song title, smirking a little as you find the song you’re looking for. 

You add ‘Here I Am (Come And Take Me)’ by Al Green to the playlist, hoping you aren’t being too forward with your intentions. There is nothing more that you want than for him to do exactly that.

“Y/N, did you want me to come with you to the market or do you think you’ve got it?” Paul asks, seemingly frazzled and rushing around. 

“Oh, um, I’ve got it!” you answer, trying your best to get back into a professional headspace. 

“Great, let me know!” he smiles, zipping off in the blink of an eye. 

Your phone buzzes in your hand, this time a text is the reason behind your grin. 

Jake

1:07PM: You know, at night they light up the Eiffel Tower…

You

1:08PM: Oh do they?

Jake

1:09PM: Sure do, it’s pretty.

You

1:10PM: Maybe I’ll see it while we’re here…

Jake

1:11PM: Or, you could see it tonight, with me.

You

1:12PM: I’m guessing that invitation is still standing?

Jake

1:13PM: Consider it an open invitation, indefinitely.

You

1:14PM: I’ll keep it in mind. ;)

You shove your phone back into your pocket before he can respond again, making your way towards the greenroom to check on the status of the venue provided items before you head out to the market. Your eyes glance around the hallway, looking for any sign of the new security detail, wanting one more look at the new faces. 

You make it into the greenroom finding everyone hanging around before soundcheck starts. A bluetooth speaker is playing music in the corner that Daniel seems to be in control of, laughing as Sam throws something at him and tells him to change it. You meet eyes with Jake for just a brief second as you make your way over to the food table, looking away from him quickly. You nod your head along to the song playing as you organize the drinks the venue staff brought, making your mental list of items to pick up. You check the time on your phone and know you need to get moving, knowing they will be ready for some food by the time sound check is over. 

You grab your purse from the floor and sling it over your shoulder, catching Jake’s eyes again as they are locked in on you from the couch he is sitting on. An acoustic guitar is slung over his body, his fingers tinkling away at the strings as he attempts to play along with whatever song is playing on the speaker. His eyes don’t leave you though, and you can tell that they haven’t since the second you walked into the room. A tiny smile pulls up the corner of his mouth, his fingers still moving rapidly over the strings. Your eyes flick over to watch them work for just a moment before meeting his eyes again. He lifts his brow as his smile grows and you feel your chest growing warm from just one look. 

Josh breaks the tension by standing up and announcing that it was time for soundcheck. Jake’s eyes finally break away from yours, sitting up and placing the guitar on the couch next to him. You turn away and walk to the other side of the room to check the coolers for ice, finding that thankfully they were already filled. The guys start to make their way out of the room, everything growing quieter as the room empties. You notice that Jake is taking his time to make it to the door, lagging behind until the two of you are the only ones left. You swallow nervously as he walks towards you, both hands in his pockets. 

His eyes meet your purse that is hanging over your shoulder, biting his lips together. “Going somewhere?”

You smile and kick your boot against the floor, “Yeah, this band I work with is sending me on a wild goose chase through Paris for snacks.” 

“And liquor,” he taunts, his eyes locking in on yours. “Definitely don’t forget the liquor.”

“Yeah, I better double check my list, wouldn’t want to make my boss mad,” you say, raising a brow. You know he doesn’t like it when you call him that, but you’re willing to push him a little.  

“Your boss, huh…” he pauses, bringing his hand out of his pocket. He lazily swipes his fingers over his lips before dropping his hand and grabbing yours. 

“Call me your boss again and I will show you what it looks like when I’m mad,” he smirks. 

“Is that a threat or a promise?” you ask, feeling the warmth of his hand as his fingers trail up your arm. Your phone starts to ring in your purse, a call coming at possibly the worst time. 

A hum leaves his chest as he nods his head, “It’s both, but I think you know that, don’t you baby...”

You smirk at him as you pull your phone from your purse, seeing Ruth’s name lighting up the screen. 

“It’s Ruth, I should take this. I’ve had a hard time staying in touch with her with the time difference,” you start, feeling his hand grip into your bicep before letting go. 

“Take it, I gotta run anyway,” he laughs, giving you a sweet smile. “Tell her I say hello, and don’t do me too dirty on the recap,” he finishes with a wink. With that, he is disappearing out of the door with a final look over his shoulder. You stand rooted in place as you slide your finger across the screen, answering the call. 

“Um, he–hello…” you answer, positively frozen, still unable to move. 

“Hello? Y/N?” Ruth says. 

“Yeah, yeah I’m here, I just– I… I’m walking to the store to get some snacks. I just had a little moment there for a second right as you called. I’m good now,” you answer, pushing through the door and heading for the venue exit. 

“Oh, what’s up, you okay? Did I interrupt? Is this a bad time? I just poured a glass of wine and sat down on my couch. I wanted to listen to you yap so I don’t have to think about my own sad miserable life. Did you give the sexy guitar man another shot in the sack or what? Please, feed me, I’m dyin’ over here!”

You laugh as you shake your head clear, “Ruthie, babe, go grab the bottle, because we’ve got a lot of ground to cover and I’ve got twenty-five minutes.”

—

JAKE POV

Josh was right. Josh was so right. 

You feel animalistic on stage tonight, like your comfort level is at an all-time high with no fear or apprehension for what could happen. Sometimes these moods will hit you out of nowhere, like an unexpected bout of giddiness and raw connection to your instrument that you let shine through in your performances. But Josh learned a long, long time ago that nine times out of ten, when you get into these moods, it’s because you had a particularly good night the evening before. 

You know she is watching you. You can feel her eyes on you. Sure, the thousands of other fans in the arena are eyeing you all the same, but the fact that she knows she gets to spend the night in your bed tonight makes your dirty thoughts rush with a little more fervor, and your efforts to show out become a little more pointed. 

You glance to your left and see her standing in the wings, her hands stuffed in the pockets of her tight black jeans, one eyebrow cocked as her expression contorts into a sarcastic look of intrigue. She knows exactly what you’re doing. And you’re not afraid to keep it going. You’d be lying if you said you weren’t overly excited for what your night will hold as soon as you can get her in your bed again. The thoughts are all-encompassing, but you channel them, lasering in on concentrating on the show. 

The amount of times the eye contact with her has happened tonight should be a bit concerning, honestly, but you don’t mind it. You flourish in knowing you’re taking up space in her mind, too. 

The second you catch her singing along to one of your songs out of the corner of your eye, you almost break in half. You hadn’t really talked about your music with her yet. You should have, but…how do you even bring that up? But also, she hadn’t asked, really. But there she was, singing along to Fate of the Faithful. 

Interesting…this one is at the top of your list, too. 

She didn’t see you notice her mumbling the words and nodding her head along, but damned if it didn’t make your dick throb. You smirk, telling yourself you’ve only got two more songs until encore, and you were going to take advantage of that time if it killed you. 

The seconds tick by as you finish out The Archer, and as soon as the lights go down, you kick off the necessary pedals and rip your guitar strap off, shoving your guitar into the trusted hands of your tech. 

The hallways are dark backstage, and the atmosphere almost feels eerie as you can hear your heartbeat in your ears, still half-deaf from the volume of your amps. You’ve got approximately six minutes. Where is she?

You pace the hall to the green room, out of breath and covered in sweat as you search for her, your eyes darting left and right as you pass by staff in the dark, crowded hallways. Where are you, baby? You feel your chest heaving up and down as you maintain your breath, trying to slow it back down when you know that within seconds, it will be picking back up again, if only you could find her…

Suddenly you spot her, keeping her hands busy at a random table. She has her back to you, so you place a strong hand on her shoulder, lightly squeezing but whipping her around to face you. She’s surprised at first, but then her face softens when she realizes it’s you. 

“Jake, what are you—“ You cut her off with a quick ‘shh’, checking your surroundings to make sure there is no one around to watch you take her hand and pull her away, walking fast down the hall until you find a room that will suffice. “Where are we going?” you hear her. 

The jam room. Perfect. 

You burst through the door knowing that there is no chance at all anyone will be in here, but you double check just in case. Your heart is still pounding in your ears; just the feeling of her hand in yours is sending your mind down an unforgivable path. You close and lock the door behind you. Five minutes. 

“Jake!!!” She says your name a little louder now, grabbing your attention for real this time. You grab both of her shoulders, her body stiffening under your touch. You slowly back her against the door, pressing your hips into hers. You hear her gasp, her hands immediately grabbing at your bent elbows. You’re craving her so badly you can hardly stand it, so you push her a little harder, attaching your lips to the sensitive skin of her neck. 

She moans a little giggle into your ear as you feel her body respond to your touch. “You’re crazy, Jake! It’s almost encore—“

“You don’t think I fucking know that, Y/N?” you growl, running your tongue up the side of her neck. “Couldn’t wait another second. Needed to taste you.” You surprise yourself, even, with your own display of need. But she isn’t arguing, in fact, she’s already gripping at the seams of your sweat-soaked jacket. 

“Taste me… taste me?” she purrs, “We definitely don’t have time for that, now, Jacob…”

Four minutes. 

“Huh-uh. Not that. Just like this…” You crash your lips onto hers, her hands now reaching under your jacket and gripping into your skin. This is all you want, to taste her. Kiss her…lose yourself in the rush of her. It’s heated and sloppy, but she’s kissing you back, and you aren’t going to waste one second of this precious time. 

For a second you worry that the marks of her nails scratching against your already blood-stimulated skin will be obvious to the audience, but you really don’t fucking care, at this point. You’re ravenous for her, and from the feel of things, she is for you, too. Her tongue delves deep into your mouth as you pull her hips into you, grinding yourself against her. Her hands drift down to your waistline, her fingertips barely sneaking underneath as she skims the hem.

“Ah ah, baby. Not that far. I’ve gotta go face ten thousand people,” you say, knowing that the situation in your pants is already on its way to being blatantly obvious to the naked eye. She whines into a kiss, her lips still breathlessly pulsing against you. 

Three minutes. 

“Then why’d you pull me back here, huh? You’re a fuckin’ tease…” she says, her words making your situation a million times worse. 

“I’m the tease?” you pant. “Ho ho, you’re sadly mistaken, sweetheart. That’s the pot calling the kettle black.”

Her fingers knead into your lower back as you tighten your jaw, her head tilting back against the door.

“Oh, yeah? ‘N why is that?”

“You left me a gift in my hotel room, don’t you remember?” you ask, cocking an eyebrow. 

She shakes her head once. “A gift? I— no…”

“Mhm. You did. You sneaky little thing, probably didn’t even mean to, did you?” you retort. You slyly reach your hand to your chest, nimbly sliding your fingers into the small pocket sewn to the inside of your jacket. Still right where you put it, you pull out the red lace thong, letting it dangle off of your extended middle finger. 

Her face goes stark white. “Oh my god…” she whispers. 

“Mhm. So tell me baby, did you leave it on purpose, or did you just conveniently not even notice you left my room that morning without any panties on?” you press confidently, watching her face turn from ghost white to crimson red. You love it when she blushes. 

She swallows and regains her composure, but you know she’s falling apart just the same as you are. You jut your hips into her again as she stutters over her words. 

Two minutes…

“Answer me, baby…”

“I—I don’t remember, I guess I kicked them to the floor and forgot to—“ she struggles to understand and remember how she could have possibly walked out of your room half naked. “Jake, in your pick pocket? Are you insane? You could have dropped it on stage…”

You smirk again at her underestimation. “No, I wouldn’t have. My fingers are a bit more adept than you think they are, I suppose,” the double entendres obvious in your tone. “I’ll remind you of that, later.” You bite your bottom lip in between your teeth as it starts to hit you that you’ve got to walk back soon. Or run, actually. “Wanted to keep it safe and sound, right here,” you pat your hand against the pocket. “But, here you go, you can have it back. So that I can see it in action again.” You grip her wrist and turn her palm up, flipping her hand to place the thong into her grasp. 

You grab her face and press one more quick, heated kiss to her lips as you feel the time closing in around you. You turn and reach for the door handle, peeking outside to make sure the coast is clear. You begin to make moves to go, before you hear her voice strangled and weak behind you. 

“Jake, wait,” she spouts, pulling your hand to make you face her again. She rolls up the red lace tightly in her hand and yanks you back to her by your lapels. She stuffs the thong back into your pick pocket before shoving you away from her again. 

“Finders keepers.”

——

“Damn if there weren’t some creative signs in the crowd tonight, eh?” Josh pokes his elbow into your shoulder as he sits beside you on the arm of the couch. You wince a laugh as you remember a few of them. 

“Paris is the City of Love!” you cock an eyebrow as you chug an ice cold bottle of water. 

“No, stupid, it’s the City of Lights,” Sam butts in. “Gas street lamps before there was electricity… ya know…”

“Nobody fuckin’ asked you, Samuel,” you wave your hand at him. “No, sorry I didn’t do a full research dissertation on the city of Paris before we got here,” you click your tongue as you stand from the couch and walk toward your backpack.

Danny busts through the door as he begins ripping the silver chainmaille-like overlay from his body. “Jake, I swear to god if you keep singing like that on B stage I might actually be forced to like the idea of your new band,” he says, making your face flame. 

“Yeah, yeah, yeah, whatever…” you say as you remove your own jacket. 

“He was flat as fuck, what do you mean, Daniel?” Josh yells.

“I’m serious, you sound really good, man. I haven’t heard you sing like that since we were in the garage that one time and Josh got too high and passed out.”

“That happened once, thank you very much. And I woke right back up as soon as I heard him disrespecting my microphone like that,” Josh says. You smirk at the memory as you unzip your bag, pulling a fresh set of wrinkled clothes from it. You decide to keep your mouth shut as you listen to them bicker. 

“Uh, I recall that happening many times, actually…” Sam adds. “Because that one time Mom came barreling into the garage and sat down and listened because she didn’t know who was out here that wasn’t Josh.”

“Yep,” Danny agrees. “Fuck, that was a long time ago. Anyways. Sound good, man.” Danny claps a hand to your shoulder as you purse your lips.

“Thanks,” you reply. You really wish someone would change the subject.

“Hey, did you see Murph and his teammates absolutely fucking patrolling the crowd tonight?” Sam says. “That guy is seriously no nonsense, isn’t he?”

“Shh, he’s literally standing outside the door like the fucking King’s Guard,” Danny whispers as he laughs. 

“Is he really?!” Sam exclaims. “Wow…”

“Hey, we need to initiate them…” Josh adds, flipping an empty water bottle into the air as he picks at the rhinestones on his face. 

“Fuck, yeah we do, don’t we?” you say. “Josh, find us a spot.”

“Already way ahead of you, brother.” He grabs his phone off the couch and pulls up the screen, walking over to show you. “Seven blocks away.”

“Aha, perfect. Let’s do it,” you say as Josh flips through the Google photos and Yelp reviews.

You wonder where Y/N has journeyed off to, most likely somewhere with Wes or Paul. Your mind flashes back to just a little while ago in the jam room, and thankfully, your little heated escape was enough to tide you over long enough to get your head back on straight. 

“Daniel. Go alert the new knight in shining armor that we’re moving in twenty minutes,” Josh says, and Danny responds with a double thumbs-up.

—--

Y/N

11:59PM: Where did you run off to, Mr. Pickpocket?

You smile at your phone as you lean your elbows up on the high-top table of the bar, waiting for Josh to return with your drinks. 

You 

12:00AM: Place called Barracuda’s. You coming?

Y/N

12:01AM: Mmm, might make it. Ty stayed back to help me, again. Why is he so nice to me?

You

12:02AM: He really likes you, from what I hear 🙂

Y/N

12:02AM: You guys talk about me…?

You

12:03AM: Only good things. Don’t worry. See you soon

Just as you wrap up your conversation with her, Josh returns to the table with two cocktails. He pulls the straw from the drink and empties the contents from it into his mouth.

“Thank you,” you say, removing your straw after giving it a little stir, taking a large swig of the rather strong drink.

“She coming out?” he asks under his breath.

You shrug, glancing back to the bar at Lyla and Mia. “Think so, we’ll see.”

“Where did you disappear to before encore? I usually pass you at the urinals,” he says, keeping his voice low. 

“You don’t have to guess, Josh,” you smirk, tilting an eyebrow to him. He laughs, catching the attention of Murph from across the bar and inviting him to come over to your table. 

“Hot and heavy, huh? Listen, you know I was just kidding in the green room earlier. Giving you shit. You really do sound phenomenal,” he says as he takes another sip. 

“Ah, s’alright, I guess,” you shy away, still feeling indifferent about singing in front of a crowd like that. The thought of soon having to do it without the help of your brothers sends a shockwave of nerves through your stomach, but, the comfort comes more and more as the days go on. 

“Murph! My man, how was the night? Everything go accordingly?” Josh changes the subject as soon as Murph joins your table. He leans down, letting out a sigh.

“Think so, you tell me! Everything felt stout on our end, no hiccups or miscomms…” he shrugs his shoulders as he nods.

“Excellent! No yeah, Dean looked a lot more at ease tonight, so we really appreciate it,” Josh agrees as he places a harsh pat on Murph’s shoulder. 

You extend your hand to him, realizing that you had not yet had a formal introduction. “I’m Jake, nice to finally meet you,” you say as he shakes your hand. “Really appreciate you coming on board on such short notice with us.”

Murph stands back up and swivels his head, clapping his hands across his biceps. “Absolutely, man. We’re thankful to be here. This is my third tour of Europe, actually. Was in this very bar not a year ago,” he laughs, and you can feel a natural sincerity radiating from him. 

“Really!” you exclaim as you watch him step behind Josh and move to the wall side of the table. 

“Sorry, I like to be able to see the door. Yeah! Love it over here, feels so much different than home, but. Traveling the world is what I know best,” he explains. 

“Guess we’ve got that in common, huh?” you say, sipping your drink. 

Just then Dean joins your table, sharing quick hellos with everyone. 

“Sounds like the evening went smoothly for you, Dean?” you ask.

“It did, Mr. Jake. These guys know their shit. I’m really happy about the additions,” Dean says. “That first night here with the runner still has me feeling guilty, I’m not gonna lie.”

“What happened?” Murph perks up. “If you don’t mind…”

“Of course not,” Dean begins to explain. “She left late one night for an errand, decided to stop for a late dinner in a pub, some jackass decided to make her his main goal of the evening, if you catch me. Got a little too close for comfort, she hadn’t gotten my contact yet, so Jake here went and found her kind of caught up in the ropes of a very uncomfortable situation that could have gone awry. I should have been there, but. All ended well. She was shaken up, from what I could tell.” Dean shakes his head at the memory. 

You nod in agreement. “She was, but, all good. Glad we made the decision to add you guys on to the team.”

Murph nods as he finds Sasha and Monty in the corner, nodding their way as he hand signals something to them.

“That’s what we’re here for. Here to help,” he says.

“You coming to see the Tower with us tomorrow?” Josh asks. 

Murph gives him a sarcastic grin. “Kinda have to, don’t I?”

“Well shit, Murph, if you don’t like us just say it,” you tease, playfully slamming your palm on the table.

Just then a loud ruckus erupts from the bar as you notice Danny and Sam yelling and laughing with Mia and Lyla. Dean steps away to continue his patrol. 

Josh leans back across the table. “Murph, let us get you a shot. What’s your poison?”

Murph raises his hand as he politely declines. “Ah, I appreciate it, man, but no thanks. I only allow myself one beer for the whole night, and it’s been gone five minutes.”

“Ahh, not even one?” you press. “Come on…”

“Thanks gents, but I’ve got a job to do. You may be off work but my job is just starting,” Murph says, glancing at his watch. “Nice to finally meet you guys, I’ll pop back over in a bit.” He pats you both on the shoulders and drifts off again into the sea of people. 

It’s quiet for a second as you and Josh sip at your drinks. “He passes,” Josh says. 

“Yup. Flying colors.”

Just then you watch as Y/N pokes through the door, Corri and Paul on her tail. The two of you are quickly becoming accustomed to finding each other’s eyes in a crowd, as you are the very first person she sees when she walks in. Your stomach falls to your feet as you take her in… hair a mess from the busyness of the night, but still just as gorgeous as ever.

You step to the bar to order another round, adding on one Tito’s and sprite for her. Extra lime. After the bartender brings your drinks back to you, you step back over with Josh, waiting for her drink to be delivered to her. When she finally gets it, you watch as she shoots you a disapproving but playful glare from across the crowd, shaking her head and rolling her eyes as she sips it anyway. 

“Talk to Isla any more after that big blow up?” Josh asks.

“No. Not at all,” you mumble. “Thank god.”

“Hm. Maybe she caught on finally.”

“Doubt it,” you disagree, feeling that strange guilty twinge in your gut again. 

A while later, you and Josh are mingling with the other guys and some of the crew as you feel the night becoming heavy and the liquor swirling in your bloodstream. Spirits are high, and you really like to think that the added security has put everyone a little more at ease, knowing that letting loose and relaxing feels easier now.

You split from Josh and find a seat at the bar next to Danny and Murph, interrupting their conversation about some TV show they are both binging. You try to listen in, but your attention is pulled away as you catch sight of Y/N finally making her way through the crowd, stopping and giving quick hellos to everyone as she walks by. You can tell her drink has been refilled, and her eyes pop to you every few seconds as she gets nearer. 

“Hey guys,” she finally says as she approaches you. Danny turns back around and stands from his seat, offering it to her.

“How’s it going?” you ask, patting the seat cover for her to join you and Murph.

“Good, the drinks here are really strong,” she laughs as she takes her seat, pulling the lime from the side of her glass and bringing it between her teeth. You watch as she licks her lips, hoping that you’ll be able to taste it on her later.

HER POV

You rest your chin on your fist as you listen to Jake and Murph talk. You know you must look positively enamored hanging on every word that flows between the two of them. You decide right then and there that you could listen to Jake talk forever, but even more you could watch Murph talk forever. Something about the two of them interacting has your blood pumping a little harder, and your skin growing warm. Jake’s eyes flick over to yours every couple of seconds, a small barely noticeable smile turning the corners of his mouth as he continues with his conversation. You really don’t have anything to add to it, but you are happy to be here, listening to them talk. 

Jake’s hand moves from his lap, his fingers gliding up and down your leg sending a chill up your spine. He moves them back to his own leg, touching you just enough to let you know he still wants you here, next to him. You grab your drink and take a sip from the tiny black straw, letting the lime flavored bubbles sweep over your tongue.  

You feel your purse start to buzz next to you, quickly pulling you from your blissful bubble. As you fish it out of your bag you see that Wes is calling, and you know it has to be important since he is still at the venue. 

“Hey, I’m gonna go take this, I’ll be right back, okay?” you say, turning towards Jake. 

His eyes glance to the screen, “Well, here, why don’t I just come with you.”

“Oh no, it’s fine. It will only be a second. Promise. Stay, you guys keep talking,” you offer. 

He purses his lips together and nods his head, his eyes telling you that he will be waiting for you.

You scurry out the door of the bar as you answer the call, finding a fairly crowded patio with space heaters. “Hey Wes, what’s up?”

“Hey, sorry to bother you, I know you’re out, but do you know where the second venue cooler went? It’s not in the greenroom or the jam room.”

You furrow your brow, vaguely remembering watching it walk out the door today. “I think that Jeremy from sound might have taken it back with his crew. I would also check the rigging crew room, stuff always seems to find its way in there,” you answer. 

You can hear him making his way around the venue, likely doing his final sign offs before they leave. 

“Ah! Here it is! Thanks so much, Y/N! Enjoy your day off tomorrow!” he says. 

“No problem, you too! Call me if you need anything!” you offer. 

“Will do, bye!”

You let out a sigh, happy that you were able to help him locate an item that definitely falls under your responsibility. You put your phone in your back pocket and turn around to head back inside, only to find that Murph is standing at the door with his eyes on you turning his hat from front to back on his head.

You straighten your shoulders a little as you walk towards him, feeling confident thanks to the alcohol in your system. 

“You didn’t need to follow me out here, you know…”

You see him smirk a little and lick his lips before he speaks, “Actually, I did.”

You look around at the people near you before turning back to him, “I don’t think anyone out here is really a threat, do you?”

He shrugs his shoulders, “I’ve been in this exact bar once, don’t care for a repeat of what happened last time I was here.”

“And that was?”

“A story for another time,” he winks. 

“Well, I don’t know what they told you, but I’m really not as fragile as they think I am,” you add. 

He grabs the door handle and motions for you to walk through, “That’s not something I’m willing to take a chance on. I don’t think women should have to go anywhere alone, especially pretty ones.”

You feel your heart pound in your chest at his admission, and you can barely feel yourself moving through the doorway. 

“Pretty, huh?” you smile, looking back at him over your shoulder. A smile is on his own face as he nods gently. 

“Very,” he confirms, causing your face to blush bright red just as you step up to the table. 

Jake takes in the sight of you with a questioning look, letting his eyes flick over to Murph then back to you. Murph returns to his seat looking completely unphased, as if he didn't just openly flirt with you.

“All good?” Jake asks, leaning over to whisper in your ear. 

You let your hand land on his thigh as your head leans into his lips, “Yeah, perfect.”

His eyes linger on you for a touch longer than usual, his hand brushing yours as it sits on his leg. He leans over letting his lips brush your ear, “I think I’m ready to head back…”

“Are you?” you taunt. 

“You joining me?” he asks.

“Is this my formal invitation?” you answer. 

“Meet me up front in five,” he replies. 

He turns back to the group talking, announcing that he is going to head back to the hotel but no one takes him up on his offer to leave.

“Would you like me to walk you, brother?” Murph asks, “I’m more than happy to.”

“I’ll grab Dean, but thanks man. Appreciate it,” Jake answers, giving him a courteous nod. 

He slides out of his seat and bids everyone a good evening, giving you a special look that tells you he will be waiting for you. 

You know it will look suspicious, but you also know that you should make your getaway before the others come back to the table. You wait a few minutes and tell Josh and Murph that you are also going to head out for the night, neither of them really putting the pieces together, or so you think. 

As you walk through the front door you see Jake, finishing out the last drag of a blunt, blowing the smoke up to the sky. 

“Hey beautiful,” his voice is gravely and deep as you step up to him. 

He grabs your hand and laces his fingers with yours as the two of you begin to walk back in the direction of your hotel. 

“Remember the first time you walked me back to the hotel?” you ask, calling on the memory of just a few short nights ago. 

“Sure do, kissed you in that restaurant and I’ve been a goner since,” he laughs, “Took everything in me not to kiss you again at your door.”

“You could’ve, you know, if you wanted to,” you tease. 

“I think things turned out okay, hmm?” he growls, gripping your hand a little tighter. 

The two of you make the short walk back to the hotel, dashing into the elevator before you’re seen by prying eyes. He presses the button for his floor, letting the elevator climb until the doors spring open with a ding. 

He starts to lead you to his room, stopping short and turning around, “Actually, I’m gonna grab something from the vending machine. Would you like anything?”

“Ummmm…No, I think I’m okay, just ready to take these shoes off,” you giggle. 

He hands you his room key, and nods for you to go ahead, “Just flip the latch for me, yeah?”

You nod and head down the hallway, watching him over your shoulder as he disappears around a corner. 

You tap his keycard to the door and step inside, finding it exactly how you left it. You toss your things onto the small chair in the corner, walking over to the window to take in the stunning view. He was right, it is pretty at night.

A minute or two later you hear him sliding into the room, shutting the door and locking it behind him. His arms are full as he deposits everything onto the dresser, taking in the room for the first time since he’d arrived in Paris. 

“S’nice room,” he mutters, walking over towards you. His hands slide around your waist as he rests his head on your shoulder. His gaze finds the tower, lit and sparkling in the night. “Gonna take you there tomorrow.”

“Oh, are you?” you ask. 

“Mhmm, if you’ll let me,” he pauses, “Gotta see it the right way.”

“What exactly is the right way?” you tease. 

“With me. Obviously,” he goads.

You spin in his arms, facing him now. “Obviously.”

His hand slides up your body, coming to rest at the side of your neck as he leans forward pressing his lips to yours. Your arms circle him, deepening the kiss as you pull him closer letting your tongue slide against his. He tastes of alcohol and tobacco, a flavor you are becoming more and more fond of with each passing day. He backs you up against the window, placing his palms against the glass to box you in. His mouth never leaves yours, hot and desperate as his knee moves to part your legs. Your hands grip into his waist as you pull him closer, fumbling with the buttons of his shirt. 

It’s not long until you are pushing his shirt off of his arms and tugging on the waistband of his pants, his hands undressing you in much the same fashion. Your bare ass is pressed to the glass window, only your bra left and his boxers. Deciding not to give the people of Paris a show, you push away from the window and walk him backwards to the bed, your lips still locked with his. 

A growl leaves his chest as you push him backwards, crawling across the bed over top of him. His hands find the clasp of your bra, unfastening it and quickly pulling it from your arms. His head cranes upward to take your nipple into his mouth, his hands pressing your hips down into his groin. His thumbs massage circles into the crease of your hips as you start to roll them against him, feeling his hot tongue lapping at your chest. 

“Can’t believe you played that whole show with my thong in your pocket,” you whine.

He pulls his mouth away from you, “Mmm, my good luck charm.” 

“You’re depraved,” you tease, feeling his length fully hard beneath his boxers. You roll your hips over him, eliciting a groan from his chest.

“Fuck, baby… Been hard for you all fuckin’ night.”

“Yeah? You want me, Jake?” you ask, delivering a harder roll into his groin. 

“Yeah I fucking want you,” he says, flipping the two of you over until you’re settled on your back. “And I didn’t like you being all flushed when you came back into the bar tonight, the fucks’ all that about, huh?” he pauses, giving you a playful raise of his brow.

So he did pick up on it.

“Why? Are you feeling a little territorial? A little jealous?” you tease. 

“No, I’m not a jealous man, but I like being the one to make you blush,” he pauses, dropping his lips to your neck, “And the one to make you whine and scream,” he nips at your skin, “And the one to leave you flustered and breathless.”

“So do it then, Jacob,” you counter. 

He raises his brow at you again, giving you a playful smirk as he pushes up off the bed and kicks his boxers to the floor. He looks around the room for his suitcase before stopping at looking at you sprawled out on his bed. 

“You on the pill or the shot or anything?” he asks. 

“I’m on the pill,” you answer. “You don’t need to–”

“Thank fuck,” he growls moving back towards the bed. He runs his hand up your bare leg letting his lips meet yours again. You reach between you, grabbing his length as it hangs between the two of you. He is fully hard and warm to the touch, his blood pumping furiously as your fingers feel his pulse in his veins. 

“I want you like this,” he breathes, lowering his hips as you position the tip of his cock to your entrance. He fists himself at the base, taking over control from you as you move your arms to rest over your head. You stare up at him, brow furrowed in concentration as he swipes his tip through your wetness.

“God, fuck, you’re so hot sometimes I can’t stand it.”

“You’re one to talk, I have to watch you on stage every night,” you tease, bucking your hips up. 

“Patience, I’m getting there,” he says, teasing you with the tip as he presses in just slightly. “You like watching me on stage, baby?”

He presses in a little further, the unshielded warmth of his bare cock making your head spin. 

“So sexy,” you whine, “So sweaty.”

“Feels fuckin’ good up there, but feels better, here,” he says, pressing in completely. He stops for a moment, letting you adjust to him, both of you reveling in the feeling of each other without the barrier of a condom. 

“So much fuckin’ better here,” he breathes. 

You open your legs further to allow his hips room to move as he pulls back with a groan. He slams his hips back into you, his eyes locked in on yours. He hooks his hand under your knee and pulls your leg up around his hip. “Keep it there for me, okay?”

You nod as he starts to move his hips at a consistent pace, bracing himself on one hand as the other hand grips into the flesh of your ass. He uses it as leverage to pull you into each thrust, hitting you harder and deeper with every stroke. 

“You’re sinfully wet sweetheart,” he growls, his skin slapping into yours. “Almost feels too good.”

“So warm, so fuckin’ tight,” he continues, “Look out the window, look at that pretty view while I look at mine.”

You turn your head as he instructs, seeing a slightly obstructed view of the tower from the window. You can feel his eyes on you, studying you with every perfectly delivered thrust of his hips. 

“Fuck, Jake…” you whine, tightening around him. 

“Oh Jesus, fuck me, do that again,” he begs, a hot breath against your chest. 

You twist your hips as you clench around him, earning a groan from his chest.

“Goddamn, Y/N,” he pants. “Actually, flip over, face the window, want you to see it all.”

He pulls out of you and you flip to your stomach, feeling his hands as they grip into your hips to pull you up on all fours. 

“Yeah, baby, goddamn just like this, arch your back a little.” He pauses, running his fingers up your spine. “Yeah, yeah, good girl.”

You feel him press back into you, this angle much deeper and gives him more leverage. He uses it to his advantage as he slams into the back of you, the tinkling of the coins around his neck echoing through the room. You feel a drop of sweat as it drips from his face, sliding over the curve of your ass. You turn to look back at him, a sweating mess of pure sex. His skin is flushed pink and his hair is stuck to his neck as he grazes your cervix with each stroke of his hips. You can feel yourself getting close, and you’re sure he can feel the fluttering as you clench around him. 

“Feel good, sweetheart?” he asks, breathless. 

“So good baby, I’m so close, I need it,” you whine.

“Head forward, look at the pretty view, baby,” he says, pushing your face forward and grabbing a fist full of your hair. He grips into your roots pulling your head back as a groan leaves his chest. He feels impossibly hard inside of you, twitching and jerking as his hips start to falter. 

“Gonna fuckin’ cum, baby,” he warns, “Perfect pussy so warm and tight, begging for me. Cum, baby, cum on my cock, want to feel you.”

His hand reaches around, his fingers swirling against your clit before circling the opening where his cock is buried inside you. “Stretched so perfect around me, goddamn, wet and fuckin’ perfect. You feel that? You feel your perfect pussy stretched out for my cock?”

His words send you tumbling head first into your orgasm, his name echoing around the room as it falls from your lips. Your arms feel weak as your upper half collapses down to the bed, his hips still drilling into you at a brutal pace. 

“Fuck me, you’re so gorgeous, feel so fuckin’ good when you cum for me sweetheart,” he pants. 

You squeeze him one more time, and it pushes him to the brink. You lift your head to turn and look at him, but he stops you, pushing your head back down. 

“Head down, baby,” he growls. 

Suddenly his hips stop and he pulls himself out of you, stroking his cock furiously as he lets go. It’s your name on his lips as his hot ropes of cum paint your back, in several forceful spurts. His breathing starts to even out, and you feel his hand as it grips into your ass, delivering a playful smack. 

“You look so fucking hot like this,” he mumbles. “Actually, stay like that, hold on.”

You feel him step off the bed, rifling around in his coat pocket. You see his feet come into view as he steps up to the side of the bed. Your eyes travel up to look at him, feeling his warm cum sliding further and further down your back. 

“Let me take a picture, beautiful. For me, won’t show your face, promise. You’re just stunning like this,” he asks. 

You look at him for a second, and you can tell he’s telling the truth, so with a sly grin you nod and give him your approval. 

“Fuck, yeah just stay like that,” he says, pushing your hair to the side as his cum slides down the hollow of your spine. 

You hear the camera on his phone as he takes a few pictures, quickly tossing it to the nightstand before tapping your ass and telling you you can lower yourself down to the bed. 

“Let me get a towel, be right back,” he says, letting his thumb brush across your lips. 

Seconds later you feel a warm towel on your back, wiping away his release. It feels nice, being taken care of like this, his gentle touch so vastly different from the man he was just five minutes ago. He cleans you up and returns the towel to the bathroom, giving you the chance to slide beneath the sheets. As he steps out of the bathroom he grabs a few things from the dresser and crawls into the bed next to you. You pull the sheets back for him as he moves towards the middle, pulling you into his side as you both lean against the headboard. 

He hands you a bottle of water, twisting the lid for you as you accept it from his hands. 

“Well thank you,” you blush. 

“I knew we would want these,” he laughs, twisting the lid of his own bottle. He takes a long drink and lets out a relaxed sigh, reaching over to his nightstand again to grab something else. He presents a bag of peanut M&M’s, tearing the yellow package and pouring a few into his hand. He holds it out to you nodding for you to take some. 

“And here I was thinking that the M&M’s on the rider were for Sam,” you giggle, grabbing a few.

“Those would be for me,”  he winks, tossing the rest into his mouth. “But he’s been known to partake.”

“Noted,” you smile. 

He hands you a few more, shaking the bag into his palm, “Saw you singing along tonight, you think you’ve got a favorite so far?”

You can tell he is trying to seem casual when he asks, but you know he is dying to know what you think of his music. 

“Which one was I singing along with?” you ask.

“Fate of the Faithful, I believe. S’good one, good taste,” he laughs, nudging you with his elbow. 

“Oh, yeah, I like that one. That’s when you switch to that small black guitar,” you answer. 

“You notice’ that?” he asks, as if the moment is insignificant. 

“Of course,” you answer, turning to look at him, “Notice everything you do, if we’re being honest.”

“Can I be honest?” he asks, bringing his water to his lips. 

“Sure,” you answer, your heart pounding in your chest. 

“I think you’re gorgeous, and I think you’re smart, and funny, and I’m really, really into you, Y/N.”

Just as you open your mouth to speak, a knock sounds at the door. Both of you snap your heads in its direction, Jake pulling the sheets off of him and jumping out of the bed. He grabs his boxers from the floor and pulls them on, quickly tossing you your own clothes as he rushes over to the door. You sit up in the bed, pulling your shirt over your head as he looks through the peephole. 

He rushes back over to the bed muttering curses under his breath as he looks at you, “Hey, I– I need you to– ahh, fuck, I need you to go in the bathroom for a minute,” he says, reaching his hand out to you to grasp yours. He helps you up from the bed, grabbing your water and ushering you into the bathroom with your arm full of clothes. 

“Just give me a few minutes, it’s Sam. I’m gonna kick him out, I just need a minute, okay? I’m sorry. Only a second, I swear,” he pleads, kissing your cheek and shutting the bathroom door before you have time to protest. 

Half a second later you hear the door open, and Sam’s booming voice as he walks into the room. The sound is muffled by the bathroom door but you can still hear them talking clear as day. Your heart is pounding as you hide in the dark bathroom, trying to silently redress yourself. 

“Why’d you leave so early?” Sam asks. 

“Dunno, just tired after the show I guess,” Jake answers, doing his best to sound genuine. 

“Oh, did I wake you up?” he asks. 

“Was just getting in bed actually,” Jake responds.

“Well I won’t keep you long, I just– I wanted to talk to you. I probably have had too much to drink– I just, you know I listen to you so I was hoping I could vent to you a little,” he says, tapping his hand on the wall. 

“Yeah, sure, what’s going on? You okay?” Jake asks. 

You feel guilty listening in on their conversation, but what else were you supposed to do?

“It’s Lyla, man, something is weird. She’s just acting so…strange. I’ve tried to talk to her about it the past few nights but she's just kinda shutting me out. I don’t know. Have you talked to her lately?” he asks. 

“No, no, I haven’t actually. Suppose that’s weird now that I think about it. Her or Mia actually.” 

“She’s just been on her phone a lot lately, texting, and taking calls at weird times. I don’t know, it’s probably nothing, just– it’s got me wiggin’ out kinda,” he pauses, “I gotta pee, hold on.”

“Wait! Sam, hold on uh, do you think maybe it’s um, just the time difference from the US? Maybe it’s normal time there, huh?” you can hear the panic in his voice, he is stalling giving you time to hide. You step into the shower, pulling the curtain closed as silently as possible, knowing that this is absolutely the last place you would ever want to be found. 

“Yeah, guess it could be,” Sam answers, twisting the bathroom door knob and turning on the light. You hold your breath as he steps up to the toilet, clamping your eyes shut as you grip your arms to your chest. 

This is the worst possible situation you could have ever found yourself in.

“I don’t know, I mean, what’s the time difference from here to home? You having to stay up late to deal with that shit or get up early or whatever? How’s all that going, actually? You two get it figured out? Hardly seen you on your phone lately,” Sam says, flushing the toilet as he finishes peeing. 

His question strikes you as odd, but you chalk it up to work and let it pass. You’re more worried about Sam leaving the bathroom without noticing you in the shower. He washes his hands and turns off the light, and you finally release the breath you held the entire time he was in the bathroom. Safe.

“Yeah, actually I have just been enjoying my time here. Don’t want to be on my phone. Occupying my mind and time with other more interesting things,” Jake answers, and you feel your chest grow warm. 

“Yeah, I bet it’s a nice break. I know you’ve been going through this shit for a while. I’ve heard all about it from Lyla.”

What? What shit?

“If you ever wanna talk about it, you know I’m here,” Sam offers.

“Nothing to talk about, really,” Jake says. 

“You sure about that? Lyla’s phone has been blowing up lately.” 

“Yeah. Positive. Nothing to talk about,” he answers firmly, his voice growing louder as the two of them move closer to the door. 

You feel a sinking feeling wash over you. You can tell Jake is lying, not only to Sam, but also to you. 

“Well, if you hear anything from Lyla let me know. Hey, what you getting into tomorrow?” he asks. 

“I think I’m just gonna go sight-seeing a little. Have a few spots I want to check out,” he answers.  

“Lyla is of course dragging me out to god knows where, maybe we can meet up for drinks or something?”

“Yeah, brother, sounds good. Call me if you need me, okay?” Jake says, opening the hotel room door. 

“I will. Night.”

“Night, Sammy boy,” he answers, shutting the door and locking it behind him. 

You hear the bathroom door fly open, and the overhead light flickers on as he pulls the shower curtain open. 

“Baby–” he pauses, reaching his hand out to you to help you out of the shower. He can tell your demeanor has changed, his face dropping as he realizes what all you just overheard. “You okay? How much did you hear?”

“All of it, Jake,” you answer. “What was he talking about? Is…is there something that I should know?”

His face drops again, his eyes flicking to yours as he searches them. He swallows nervously and takes a deep breath, licking his lips as he shakes his head. 

“Nothing, he was just talking about— just work stuff. No, there’s nothing. It’s nothing.”

“You promise?” you ask, begging for the truth. 

“I promise,” he pauses, pulling you out of the bathroom. “Nothing you need to worry about. Let’s go to bed, yeah?”

You nod your head and follow him back to the bed, stripping out of your clothes again and crawling into the bed. He slides in next to you, pulling you into his chest as he turns off the lamp, kissing your head as he settles into his pillow. As you lie sleepless in the bed, you can’t help the looming feeling that something isn’t right. 

Your eyes switch over to the glistening and glittering lights on the Eiffel Tower, a little blurred from the curtain hanging across the window. Jake’s already deep breathing beside you, and you begin to replay everything you heard Sam say in the bathroom. 

‘You two…time difference…been going through this shit for a while?’

What shit? 

You get real with yourself for a second, taking a page from Ruth’s book. 

You and Jake are not an item. There’s never been a line drawn in the sand, there’s never been a conversation about anything pertaining to that subject at all, really. Your stomach turns at the thought of him actually having someone waiting for him at home. From the way Sam made it sound, and the verbiage he had used, it almost sounded like exactly that. 

Hell, you hardly know Jake from Adam aside from sharing some music and surface-level conversation. You don’t know a thing about his history, home life, or much about his past at all. Neither of you ever even asked the other if you were single. 

Shit… could he…? 

But the words he said just a second before Sam knocked on the door suddenly break through your manic thoughts. He’s really into you, thinks you’re gorgeous and smart… Why would he say those things if he isn’t looking for something more?

You admit to yourself that your stance on this…relationship so far has been nothing but someone to flirt with and sleep with, spend your free time and learn about one another. Not really ever once have you thought past anything but casualness. But, had he? A full-on relationship is the furthest thing from your plans. You didn’t come here looking for that.

The thoughts swimming in your mind make you physically shake your head to scatter them. You can still feel the tiniest burning sensation on your back from his release, and you can smell the scent of his cologne and sweat still heavy on your skin. 

Could this explain why Mia and Lyla have been acting so strangely, and why Jake wanted to hide you in the shower so quickly? The sleepiness begins to overtake your body, your eyes flashing with bright bursting colors as your body relaxes against his. 

Jake wouldn’t lie. 

Would he?

.

.

.

.

.

Taglist: @britney-gvf @gretavanmoon @sacredstarcatcher @wetkleenex-gvf @farfromthehomelands @takenbythemadness @writingcold @builtbybrokenbells @ohgodthefeeling-gvf @fleet-of-fiction @milkgemini @gvfpal @ageofcj@dancingcarbon @highway-tuna @stardustjake @jakekiszkapunchmeintheface @gvfmarge @gracev0609 @myleftsock @literal-dead-leaf @peaceloveunitygvf @ageofbajabule @slut4lando @jordie-gvf @sadiechar @tinydancer40 @rosabellagvf @capnjaket @lyndz2names @thetroublegetssoloud71 @gretavanomens @spark-my-nature @josh-iamyour-mama @anythingforjtk @alwaysonthemend @danieljlmwagner @klarxtr @fortunatelytinybasement @demonrat444 @gretavansara @watchingover-hypegirl @hippievanfleet @digitalnomadz @raviolilegs @lipstickitty @hippievanfleet @klarxtr @strange-whorizons @do-it-jakey-baby @myownparadise96 @gvf-luna @starshine-wagner

[ofstarsandvibranium]

Caffeine Crash

Fandom: Ted Lasso

Pairing: Jamie Tartt x F!Reader

Summary: You go on a morning walk and you, quite literally, run into Jamie.

A/N: Part of my impromptu Jamie Tartt series, read Meet Cousin McAdoo

Isaac was still asleep when you woke up. You could hear his snores from down the hall where you stayed in his guest bedroom. For some reason, your body woke up early. It wasn't super early though, just nearing 8am. The weather was nice, so you figured you'd explore Richmond a little bit, maybe seek out a cafe for some coffee.

You got dressed in some jeans, a t-shirt, and a light jacket. You made sure you had your wallet, phone, and the spare key that Isaac lent you. Out the door you went to explore your home for the next few weeks.

_________________

Jamie was jogging ahead of Roy, per usual. It was almost eight thirty in the morning, which means his training session with Roy is ending for the day.

As Jamie's rounding a corner he crashes into someone, causing their cup of coffee to spill onto him and the person.

"Shit! I'm so sorry!" the person says and he realizes it's you, Isaac's cousin.

You seem to also realize who you ran into and you groan, "Fuck. I'm really sorry, Jamie. I guess that's what I get for trying to take a picture of my coffee," you snort, "acting like it's 2014 again or something." You give a chuckle and a shrug.

He shakes his head, "No, no. I shouldn't have rounded the corner so fast."

Roy, who finally caught up, stopped at Jamie's side, assessing the situation. He looks at Jamie then you, then Jamie again, saying "The fuck did you do to her?"

"It was an accident," you and Jamie reply in unison.

Roy gives his usual grunt and then Jamie says, "Let me get you a new drink."

"That's alrigh-"

"Please," he insists and you agree, "Okay. I'll buy you a scone then, as a thank you."

"I don't like scones."

"He doesn't like scones."

Both Roy and Jamie say at once.

You giggle, "Okay, a croissant then?"

Jamie looks at Roy, silently asking him for permission and the former footballer replies, "Fine."

The three of you proceed to head to the cafe that you were previously at and walk inside. The barista smiles politely at you, "Back so soon?"

You nod, "There was a collision and my drink was collateral," you explain.

"So same drink?"

"Yes, please," you answer. You step aside for Jamie to pay and then you're in front again, "He'll have a croissant," you nod to Jamie, "I'm paying for it." You look over your shoulder, "Coach Kent, do you-"

"No."

You chuckle, "Maybe a water for the coach here. Thanks." you proceed to pay and move towards the pick-up counter.

You sit at a table that has three open chairs, Roy and Jamie occupying the other seats. You lean back in your chair with a polite smile, "So, what brings you out this morning, boys?"

"Trainin'," Jamie says, gesturing to Roy, "Grandad here wakes me up every day at four for runs and drills."

You look at him wide-eyed, "Four in the morning?!" When they nod, you look at Roy, "Do you not value sleep? Maybe that's why you're so grumpy all the time."

Jamie laughs, "That's what I tell 'im!"

The older man glowers at you two, "Sacrifices need to be made in order to be the best."

Jamie shrugs and puts his attention back to you, "What about you? Why're you out and about alone?"

"Isaac's still asleep. I woke up a little earlier than usual. Figured I'd grab a coffee and explore Richmond a bit."

"I can give you a tour if you'd like," Jamie offers before he can even think about it.

"Oh! You don't have to. Besides, aren't you still training?"

"We've finished. Besides, I'm here and ready. Who knows how much longer Isaac will be sleeping for. I'm a great guide, by the way," he gestures to Roy, "Gave 'im a tour of Amsterdam while we were there for a game. Taught him how to ride a bike too."

You smirk at Roy, "You didn't know-"

"We don't talk about it," he cuts you off with a glare.

You chuckle, "Alright," and you turn back to Jamie, "I'd really like that if it's no trouble."

Jamie beams at you, "None at all."

The barista then calls out your order numbers and you stand, "I'll get them."

Jamie watches you walk the short distance away and Roy leans, "You better be fucking careful."

"I'm not doin' nothin'!"

"Isaac said to behave yourself around her."

"I'm just giving 'er a tour of the city! It's not like I'm proposin' or anything!" Roy leans back giving a skeptical groan.

You come back with two drinks and a pastry bag, "My drink, your croissant, and Roy, your water," you say as you hand out the items.

Jamie bites into the croissant and lets out a moan that's damn near sinful, "I missed carbs so much," he says after he swallows.

"You'll be doing extra laps during practice today," Roy sneers as he downs his water and then stands, "I'm going home."

You give him a wave and a smile, "See you around, Roy!" When he leaves you look to Jamie, "He seems fun."

He shrugs, "He's not always like that. He has some good moments." He stuffs the rest of the croissant into his mouth and you watch in amusement, sipping your coffee.

He wipes his face and hands, then stands, "Alright, nothin' like the present, right? Let's get your tour started."

"Right!" you follow him out the door, ready for this adventure with your new...friend?

[ultimateshixiongfuckertournament]

Noncanonicals Tournament Round 1, Match 7

Match 7 is between John 'Jack' Seward from Dracula (shizun/mentor: Abraham van Helsing) and Obi-Wan Kenobi from Star Wars (shizun/mentor: Qui-Gon Jinn)

Propaganda under the cut! (Warning: Propaganda may include spoilers about the characters and their media)

John 'Jack' Seward:

Actual quotes from the letter in which John Seward introduce Van Helsing:

"I am in doubt, and so have done the best thing I know of. I have written to my old friend and master, Professor Van Helsing, of Amsterdam, who knows as much about obscure diseases as any one in the world. [...]

Van Helsing would, I know, do anything for me for a personal reason, so no matter on what ground he comes, we must accept his wishes. He is a seemingly arbitrary man, this is because he knows what he is talking about better than any one else. He is a philosopher and a metaphysician, and one of the most advanced scientists of his day, and he has, I believe, an absolutely open mind. This, with an iron nerve, a temper of the ice-brook, and indomitable resolution, self-command, and toleration exalted from virtues to blessings, and the kindliest and truest heart that beats, these form his equipment for the noble work that he is doing for mankind, work both in theory and practice, for his views are as wide as his all-embracing sympathy."

I feel like this speaks for itself tbqh.

Also, here's Van Helsing's answer to Seward's offscreen summons:

"When I received your letter I am already coming to you. By good fortune I can leave just at once, without wrong to any of those who have trusted me. Were fortune other, then it were bad for those who have trusted, for I come to my friend when he call me to aid those he holds dear. Tell your friend that when that time you suck from my wound so swiftly the poison of the gangrene from that knife that our other friend, too nervous, let slip, you did more for him when he wants my aids and you call for them than all his great fortune could do. But it is pleasure added to do for him, your friend, it is to you that I come.[...]"

The Gangrene Incident is never explained beyond this. Just. Jack sucked Van Helsing canon and real

Rest assured that they are like this from here to the end of the novel

--

See above; also, let's remember the fact that Jackie can apparently do a bang up Dutch accent to give full bodied performances mimicking his professor. Van H also implies that he and Jack are blood-married.

--

Even though they are mentor/student, Van Helsing strongly believes Jack is his equal in many ways and confides in him just for emotional stability. Stereotypically the mentor pushes the student outside of his comfort zone, but it is Jack who introduces the professor to everyone else in the story. Van Helsing tells another character that Jack helps alleviate his loneliness. He writes his "in case I die" memos to Jack specifically, because there is no one else who would understand him better.

Oh also Van Helsing has a running theme of barging into Jack's room unannounced, waking him up gently from his sleep, invading his personal space with little protest.

Obi-Wan Kenobi:

None submitted

[hobbit-historian]

Cold as Ice

Pairing: Y/N x Ethan Hunt

*slight spoilers for dead reckoning part one. No major plot points, just a location. I imagined this happening right before the movie.*

Summary: hiding out in Amsterdam, you discover just how cold the night can get

Warnings: none? Unless you count being cold as one? This story is tooth-rotting fluff. There is no age mentioned for reader.

*not my gif*

Y/N closed the window softly, fighting the swollen wooden frame. She cursed under her breath has the frame squeaked, praying that no one questioned the lonely squeak coming from an abandoned building. Ethan’s footsteps sounded behind her and when Y/N turned around, she noted that he was carrying more blankets than he normally used at night. She shot him a quizzical look and he raised an eyebrow in return.

“You were shivering last night. And the weather report says that tonight’s supposed to be colder, so I grabbed us more blankets.”

Y/N hummed. “I forgot I saw that when I was at the cafe yesterday. And I suppose I was shivering the other night because you stole all of the blankets. That we were supposed to be sharing.” She crossed her arms and threw Ethan a fake pout. He chuckled and tossed a blanket her way, which Y/N caught, but only after it smacked her in the face.

Ethan let out a slight chuckle and turned back to setting up his palate on the floor. They had been hiding out here in Amsterdam for a while now, and this was the third building that they were staying in. There wasnt a mission that they were working right now - the both of them were just trying to lay low after a particularly difficult mission left them too exposed in nearby Belgium.

“I am a little confused as to why the night times get so cold around here. It’s summer. I would assume things would be hot, not cold.” Y/N mused out loud as she set up her own floor palate.

Ethan replied. “You have to remember - we’re by the coast, which cools things off significantly. And this building has most of its floor plan pretty open since it’s still under construction. Doesn’t hold to one temperature very well.” He scooter his blankets up against the wall, preferring to sleep propped up against it during the night. They would be taking turns setting a watch, and Y/N was set to go second. But Ethan always liked to be prepared in the event someone did find them here.

Y/N appreciated that about him. She had gathered things over the years - little actions and movements that Ethan did because of his job. They had known each other for a while - ever since she had helped clear him of being a mole - and so she had ample time to pick up on his quirks. She supposed that she had some of her own, but she never really took the time to notice them like she had with Ethan. He always sat facing the door in a restaurant, always ate desert first, and always picked up on the slightest details about his surroundings. He had noticed that she was shivering before she had. It was little details like those that made Ethan one of the best agents to work with.

And the hardest to find while in the field.

Y/N finished arranging her blankets and stood, stretching out her back. Yawning, she raised her arms above her head to continue the stretch.

“Tired already?” Ethan teased.

“It is almost midnight. The world is already asleep. We should be too.”

She shivered, suddenly feeling the chill in the air. “And besides. A warm blanket sounds amazing right about now.”

Y/N kicked her shoes off and crawled in between the blankets, already grinning as she pulled the top blanket up to her chin. Ethan laughed at her again, but he did the same, leaning against the wall.

“Goodnight Y/N.”

“Goodnight Ethan.”

••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

Y/N startled awake, hearing her own snoring through her sleep. She blearily blinked into the darkness. The glowing digital numbers on her watch face let her know that it was three in the morning and that she was due for her turn at watch. She wiped the drool off of her chin and rolled over to face Ethan. He was still leaning against the wall, but he had wrapped the blanket tighter around himself. He cut his eyes over at her as she sat up and shot her a quick grin. She shivered a bit, the deeper cold seeping down through the blanket.

“Did you enjoy your sleep? Cut down any trees in your dreams?”

She stuck her tongue out at him, not caring that it was a childish action. Sometimes the two of them acted like middle schoolers who could barely stand each other, but that was one of Y/N’s favorite things about their relationship.

Pulling the blanket up around her shoulders, Y/N maneuvered into a sitting position. “I’ll start my watch now, if it’s fine with you. Unless you want me to clear the forest a bit more.” She grinned and Ethan’s familiar sparkle retuned to his gaze.

He snorted. “You are more than welcome to take over the watch.” He hesitated, a question forming in his eyes, but it passed. He shook his head and kept his mouth shut.

Y/N quirked an eyebrow up at her partner. “What?”

He glanced over at her and down at the blanket wrapped around her torso. “You’re shaking again. You were shivering pretty badly while you were sleeping. Do you want one of my blankets?” His voice was quiet, tone calm. He already knew what she was going to say.

“No, I’ll stick with the ones I have. I’ll just adjust them a bit.” She didn’t want to take his blankets - after all, he would need to stay warm too.

She figured that she would shiver again on her sleep, but she had hoped that he would let the matter go. It wasn’t fair for him to have to keep an eye on her at all times. She should be able to pull her own weight and not be a burden. It was a fear of hers - that she would drag him down and cause some danger to befall them both.

Or even worse, just him.

So she rearranged her blankets and didn’t complain, hoping that at least Ethan was warm under his.

Soon, he was asleep and Y/N was left alone in the dark with her thoughts. This was the worst part of keeping watch. No one to talk to, you can’t see more than a couple feet away from you at most, and your racing thoughts the only company.

Most nights she tried to keep a lid on the thoughts bouncing around in her brain, but tonight she let them run free, trying to keep her mind off of the cold.

But a couple hours into her watch she realized that she was shivering again. Stealing a glance at Ethan to make sure that he was still asleep, Y/N tucked a blanket up over her head, burying herself underneath it as much as possible. One stayed under her and another around her middle to keep her torso warm. She settled in again to focus back on the watch, but the shivering didn’t subside.

In fact, it got worse. She sighed.

She was going to have to wake Ethan.

“Are you sure you don’t want another blanket?” His voice was groggy, but there was no judgement in his tone.

Y/N slowly turned to face Ethan, more than a little sheepish.

“I don’t think another blanket is going to help at this point.” She fought to keep her teeth from chattering audibly. No need to add more fuel to the fire.

Ethan scooted further into the corner of the wall and motioned for Y/N to sit next to him. He opened his arms and held the blanket out. “May as well use both of our body heat to keep each other warm.”

Y/N shot him an apologetic smile and followed his instructions. She slid next to him. He held the blanket open a bit longer and told her, “sit on my lap with your front facing mine. We’ll conserve the most body heat that way.”

Y/N paused. “But, my turn at watch..?” Ethan shrugged. “There’s an hour left until dawn. You made it most of the night. Let’s just call it even and get a bit more rest. Tomorrow’s relocation day anyway.”

They’d been switching buildings every couple of days to try and keep anyone who may be following them off their trail.

Since Y/N’s teeth were chattering, she didn’t argue. She wrapped herself around Ethan and under the blanket he wrapped around them, burying her face in his chest. She moaned. “Good lord you’re warm.”

He chuckled and Y/N could hear the rumble of it, way deep down in his chest.

“And you are very cold.”

He shirked away from her fingers and instead grabbed her hands, rubbing them in his hands. He tucked her left hand between the two them and held onto her right, tucking his fingers in hers.

Y/N had one lazy thought about how perfectly their fingers meshed together before she succumbed to the warmth and fell back to sleep.

Ethan kissed the top of her head and smiled. He would stay awake to keep watch gladly if it meant that Y/N was warm and comfortable.

[signoraviolettavalery]

Everything I can remember about the Den Haag and Amsterdam gigs, before I forget, but also I got about as little sleep as they did because I was a)worrying about their travel b)too hyped up to sleep

Den Haag

they were so hella energetic for people who had gone through All That to get here, Bojan was hella alive, but he didn't banter much with the crowd

It was Sinterklaas so they got soooooo many gifts. Hats, lofts of candy (traditional sinterklaas gift), bracelets, flags, letters...

Someone threw stroopwaffels because those are Kris' favorite

the Dutch crowd was so polite??? There was no barricade but nobody was grabbing them or their guitars, the only things that were being thrown at the stage were soft things like hats, nobody was chucking presents directly at them, any bracelets that got thrown were thrown gently onto the stage rather than at them

(fyi afterwards when the crew cleans up they go through and pick up all the gifts so as long as it gets onto the stage they'll get it)

they confirmed several times that they'll be back to the Netherlands

In Ne Bi Smel he changed "sem bil slep" to "sem kreten" again

when singing ASTP Bojan had the various parts of the venue cheer first, and the balcony that cheered the least loud got ASTP sung to them specifically; and at the end he changed the lyrics so they went "kako lepo disite me" aka "how nice you (plural) smell to me" idk was he saying the sweaty crowd filling this venue smelled nice to him (I have QUESTIONS)

there were balloons onstage, at some point, Jan decided he had a vendetta against the balloons, starting popping them with his boots by jumping around while playing the guitar and, being a clutz, got tangled in a flag/coat/something? by the drums and nearly fell over a;slkfjwe Jan why are you like this I love you

Kris got a pope hat that he put on right before NGVOT so he sang NGVOT as the pope I guess

Kris was drinking tea during the gig; every time Bojan was introducing the song he was just chilling by the drum set and sipping his tea while wearing sunglasses, iconic, gives zero fucks, I love him

Amsterdam

holy shit this gig was wild and magical. We gave them such a warm welcome and we screamed so loud I think even Bojan was impressed

the music as we were waiting for the gig was ABBA followed by Lady Gaga and Barbie Girl, and after the gig it was Avril Lavigne. We got most of those songs yesterday so Im' guessing Bojan picked that soundtrack :P

after they did Gola he asked "ok, so you know the words. How many of you hear aren't slovenian?" the entire fucking venue raises their hands. "we should get y'all on duolingo" Bojan Slovenian isn't on Duolingo!!

Bojan really, truly makes everyone feel seen. It's astounding. The opening act, Mia Nicolai, she was good, but she mostly just started in front of her, at the people in front of the stage. Bojan looks around and makes eye contact with everyone. The people on the balconies (I swear he looked straight at me, I died), the people in the front rows, the people on the sides, the people in the back. Every time, you feel seen. He's just got that something, not just stage presence, but that knack for being up there and making it a party that includes everyone

at some point, it got really hot and their crew started passing out water bottles. I think Bojan even went backstage during the Ne Bi Smel intro to ask them to give out more. He was really attentive and when one girl fainted or almost fainted during Ne Bi Smel he noticed, cut the music off immediately, the lights go up, and he made sure she was escorted by security and that she was okay before they restarted the song. Total pros.

introducing NGVOT: "I have to call a very special singer up to the stay. Kris. This song came about because of his broken heart. That heart is now healed" (important information to share I guess) and then Kris of course did NGVOT

Bojan: asks the crowd how to say umazane misli in Dutch. They tell him and he repeats it. Bojan then turns to Kris if he said it right, kris says no. "Well how would you say it then?" Bojan asks. "I don't know but what you said sounds wrong" as;lkfjwe Kris you're iconic

There were some Slovenians in the crowd! Including a girl whom Bojan went to high school with with. He dedicated Omamljeno Telo to her because "you heard it when I played it in high school"

He gave a really long intro to Plastika about how we're supposed to hate our analog minds and our analog bodies and how this is all terrible and basically just love yourself and don't judge others

Nace spent a lot of time playing across from Kris and didn't spend all that much time with his husband onstage :( :(

At the end Kris took off the Stozice outfit sleeves and threw them into the crowd so now there's two people who own that little piece of history

Anyway did I mention Amsterdam was magical, they were on fire, they were delighted to be there, the crowed was delighted to have them, and so enthusiastic, and there was just so much energy and hearing them live is truly something else. The recordings are amazing but being there, in that space with them, when they're at their best, hearing them actually perform those songs? Indescribable. Live CD when?

[monsterswithimagines]

Undisclosed Desires - Part 31

Joe Goldberg x female!Reader

Summary: Twenty minutes before he would have met Guinevere Beck, Joe meets you instead. You intruige him, but it will soon become clear that there is something off about you.

Words: I keep adding the amount of words and then making edits on tumblr and the words are never accurate. At this point either read or don't.

Masterlist

You guys are not ready for this. I wasn't ready for this. It took 31 parts to get here and I still kinda think it's too soon.

Welp. Anyway.

When I get back to the bus station, it's too late to catch the final bus, and you're not answering your phone.

I don't know how to get a cab in this fucking country, so I have to walk five miserable miles back to the AirBnB. Fucking fuck. It's dark and it's raining and there are no street lights, because most of the walk goes through the fields. Shit fuck shit.

When I finally get back, I want a shower, and I want to sleep forever.

And you are sitting on the couch, your knees pulled to your chest.

The TV is not on. You are not reading a book. You are facing the front door, waiting for me.

But whatever it is, I can't react, because I don't know anything and why are you looking at me like that? You're just staring at me. You don't say anything. It's getting a little creepy.

I can tell right away, just from the look on your face, that you've already gotten the news. But what have you heard? I made it look like an overdose, but I don't know if you were aware your mother had a drug problem. You never made it sound like she did. Maybe you think she killed herself on purpose.

Or maybe you don't think anything at all. Maybe you're just heartbroken.

You have not been crying. Are you in shock?

“Are you okay?” I ask, hanging up my coat casually because I don't know anything. I just came from Amsterdam, where I walked around and looked at old buildings and I don't have any fucking pictures to back that up.

You don't answer.

“It's sure pouring down out there,” I say. “I need a shower and a change of clo–”

“Why?” you interrupt.

I turn to you.

“Well, I'm cold.”

“Why did you kill my mother, Joe?”

What?

“What?”

“I didn't want you to do that,” you continue. “You can't have possibly thought I would ever want you to do that.”

“What are you talking about?” I ask, shaking my head. “Your mom's dead?”

“Don't do that,” you say. And the thing is, you don't sound angry. You don't sound any particular way. We could be talking about the weather but you say: “don't act like you didn't do it.”

“I didn't– I don’t know what you're talking about.”

I try to sound worried and confused, but even I can tell I'm failing at that particular tone. There's too much panic to convey anything else.

“You follow me,” you say. “You break into my place. You steal my stuff and you think I don't notice. At first I try to distance myself from you but it's not like you're as bad as what I’m used to and I actually like you, so I get over it and I just let you. I mean, it's not like you're actually dangerous, right?”

This is not good.

“But then I complain about Jasper, and he turns up dead. And I think… surely not. The guy had a problem. Surely my boyfriend didn't kill him.” You stand up. You're angry now.

I'm scared for us, (Y/n).

“And I ignore it. Like I ignore all of it. And I fall in love with you.”

“(Y/n)–”

“But then I get back to this country,” you say. “And Mitch. Fucking Mitch! And I think… I think to myself. There's no way Joe hurt Jasper but if he did–”

“Listen to me.”

“If he did!” you shout, and somehow you've walked up to me and you're poking me in the chest and you're right in my face. You're crying now, but you're so angry. I have never been this terrified. “I mean, I didn't think you would! I left my phone out knowing you'd check it and I thought: no way, right?” You cackle. “But yes, yes you did. And the worst part? I suspected it and I thought you might and I let it happen anyway.”

“You need to calm down.”

“And what do I do? I ignore it! I tell you the whole story like you didn't already know all of it–”

“I didn't!”

“–and I pretend I don't know that you killed him and I lie to the cops for you and you killed him. You fucking killed Mitch–”

“Stop!”

You slam against the wall.

No, you don't just slam against it, I push you. My hands are on your wrists beside your head and you're struggling. What am I doing? I don't want to hurt you. I'm not going to hurt you.

But you are so angry. I let you go and I try to step away, but you follow me, slapping at my chest.

“I didn't want you to kill her! Not her! Not her!”

You could hurt me, if you wanted to. You're not weak. But this is the worst you're doing and you want me to calm you down. I just don't know how. Not without hurting you, or putting you in the cage for a while - which is obviously not an option right now.

“(Y/n),” I say. “Please.”

And I'm holding you again, except holding is the wrong word because you are against the wall and I've got your arm twisted and I am pressing your head sideways against the grainy paint. That's going to leave a mark. Stop. stop!

“You can't just go on a fucking murder spree anytime somebody upsets me!” You shout. You are too loud. “What if I have a fight with Nadia? Or my grandparents? Or my boss doesn't give me a raise–”

“I would never hurt Nadia. She's your best friend.”

“You killed my mother!”

“She was ruining your life!”

We fall silent and you're breathing too loudly, you might start hyperventilating if I let this go on.

But what do I say? There's nothing to say. I've just admitted everything to you, and…

“You knew,” I say. My grip slackens, and you could pull loose but you don't. “How did you know?”

“I saw you following me,” you whisper. “And my landlady saw you go in after some guy came to check for a leak, or something, I don't know.” You pause. Clear your throat. “It seemed logical to assume you were the one taking my shit.”

“You didn't say anything.”

I let you go. I step back again. You turn, pressing your back against the wall.

“I didn't care, Joe.” You close your eyes, press the palms of your hands against them like you can somehow shut out the sight of me. “What's some stuff? What's a look at my phone? What's wanting to know where I am or what I'm doing? I'm in love with you. You could just ask. What does it fucking matter?”

You're in love with me, present tense. I want to hold on to that, but what if you only say it that way out of habit?

“And Jasper,” you say. “I mean… I didn't actually think… I thought I was a sick, fucked up person for even allowing the thought to come to mind.”

“You left your phone out so I'd see Mitch's texts?” I ask. But what I think is: did you manipulate me into killing your stalker for you?

“The tiniest, tiniest part of me thought you would see those texts and– and–”

But you can't even say the words.

You didn't manipulate me, (Y/n). At least not consciously.

“And I felt so guilty after,” you add. “I didn't want to know.”

I forgive you.

“He was a monster,” I say. “He deserved it. If you wanted me to kill him, I wouldn't blame you.”

You glare at me.

“He was sick. You can't just say he deserved to die. I mean, God, Joe. When he stalks me he's a creep, but when you do it, it's just fine and dandy?”

“I don't send you thousands of texts! I don't threaten to hurt you if you don't speak to me for five minutes!” I realize I'm shouting, and lower my voice. “I would never hurt you.”

“Just everyone I love?”

“No,” I say, firm. “It's not like that.”

“Then what's it like, Joe?” you ask, tearing up again.

“I–”

“Tell me something that makes this okay, that makes killing my mother–” Your voice breaks. “Please tell me how it's okay.”

“I… can't,” I say.

I have my reasons, (Y/n). But even if I thought you could really, truly understand them, I don't want you to. I don't want you to have to face the darkness I face every day.

I don’t want to break you like that.

“You can't do this,” you say softly. “You can't. I need to be able to talk to you when I feel– things, without worrying you're going to…” You stop.

“What are you saying?” I ask slowly.

“I will never forgive you for this,” you say.

“I understand.”

“Never. She's– She was my mother, and I loved her so much and she's gone. Because of you.”

“I'm sorry,” I say.

“No. Don't even start. I want no apology or explanation or justification from you. I don't want to know. I don't want to know how you did it, or why, or to who else. I don't want to know if you liked it or if you would do it again or if you want to do it again.”

And I am. Not for killing her, but for how you feel about it. I never wanted you to feel such pain. I only wanted to save you from it.

“I didn't like–”

“I don't want to know,” you stress. “And you can't do it again. I mean not– Not to people I know. Even if I hate them. Even if I ask you to in those exact words. Not ever.”

“I'm not asking you to look away,” I say.

I'm not, (Y/n). I don't want you to.

“Then what do I do?” you ask, coldly. “Do I break up with you? Do I run from you screaming? And what will happen to me if I do?”

“Nothing.” I need you to believe that.

“I don't believe you, Joe.”

So that's where we stand, then.

You know everything about me and you are afraid of me. But you're not walking away.

It's all I've ever wanted: for someone to see me exactly as I am, and stay. My mother saw my darkness and left me. Candace saw my darkness and tried to run away.

But you're here. You're looking me in the eyes, and you're staying.

Why does it hurt?

[hyunpic]

list of songs hyunjin has played on his lives/recommended:

note: im probably missing some & i couldn’t put links to all of them cause apparently tumblr has a link limit 🤨

lauv: julia, lonely eyes, invisible things, paris in the rain, never not, im so tired, the story never ends, i like me better

offonff: photograph, cigarette (ft. miso & tablo), dance, bath

beyoncé: crazy in love (remix)

billie eilish: i love you, &burn, idontwannabeyouanymore, ocean eyes, before i go, tv

honne: day1, la la la that’s how it goes

christina perri: a thousand years

shawn mendes: mercy, treat you better, in my blood

dvwn: phobia

dpr live: jam & butterfly

jehwi: dear moon

leehi: rose

bts: dna, waste it on me, make it right

colde: where love begins, string (ft. sunwoojunga), the museum, wa-r-r, your dog loves you (ft. crush), control me, a song nobody knows, im in love

got7: miracle, hard carry

justin bieber: lonely

josef salvat: call on me

taemin: criminal

night off: sleep

sam kim: make up (ft. crush), like a fool, sunny days summer nights

niki: lowkey

iu: the visitor, lullaby, knees, love poem, give you my heart, my sea

cha ni: starlight

sia: snowman

akmu: happening

sunwoojunga: run with me

the black skirts: everything

korea cracker: ocean (ft. hoyeon kim)

cosmic boy: can i love?

penomeco: no.5 (ft. crush)

yerin baek: blooming memories, limit

10cm: so…., however

day6: i’ll try, love me or leave me, when you love someone, you were beautiful, congratulations, zombie, days gone by, afraid

dean: d (half moon), instagram, what 2 do, bonnie & clyde

exo: first snow, the eve, love shot

sam fischer: this city

jukjae: do you want to walk with me?, lullaby

ph-1: nerdy love (ft. yerin baek), as i told you

baekhyun: love again, un village

amine: blackjack

young k: come as you are, guard you

flume: say it (ft. tove lo)

twice: dance the night away, fancy

ariana grande: thank u, next

hajin: we all lie

about: it has to be you

caroline says: winter is cold

h.e.r: u, wait for it

bol4: to my youth

monday kiz: winter is as i wished

paul kim: the road, additional

sweden laundry: the winter

jung seung hwan: in that winter

chungha: gotta go

zion.t: no make up, snow

airman: gloomy star, i’ll be your spring (ft. j_ust)

motte: dont run away

seventeen: a-teen, super

khalid: location

lukas graham: 7 years

imagine dragons: believer

bo kyung kim: dont think you are alone

jung ilhoon: spoiler (ft. babylon)

davichi: falling in love, 이 사랑

coldplay: everglow, viva la vida

lyn: my destiny

jus2: focus on me, long black, senses (jpn version)

crush: beautiful, you and i

ed sheeran: lego house, perfect, photograph, beautiful people

croosh: why

20 years of age: x

tori kelly: paper hearts

seulgi: always

luna: do you love me? (ft. george)

wisue: someone’s shining

epik high: eternal sunshine

jp saxe: if the world was ending

seori: fairy tale

bruno mars: marry you

the weeknd: earned it, die for you

jung seunghwan: its raining, an ordinary day, dear

sam tinnesz: play with fire

post malone: motley crew

jihyo: stardust love song

kim feel: your voice

sung sikyung: solar system, heejae

younha: stardust

wonpil: a journey

taeyeon: invu, some nights, toddler, drawing our moments

nct dream: boom

ha hyunsang: 3108

huhgak: memory of your scent

se so neon: nan chun, a long dream, midnight train, stranger

umi: remember me

tvxq!: mirotic

johnny balik: honey

red velvet: psycho

new jeans: hype boy

christian kuria: losing you

cigarettes after sex: k. , each time you fall in love, sunsetz, apocalypse

dpr ian: nerves, no blueberries, 1 shot

samm henshaw: broke

woodz: drowning

kelly clarkson: underneath the tree

kimmuseum: to you who cant sleep

taylor swift: betty

lana del rey: young and beautiful

harry styles: watermelon sugar, she

pink sweat$: honesty

masego: tadow

olivia rodrigo: vampire

troye sivan: youth, for him

kai: mmmh

2pm: my house

oasis: wonderwall, hey now

mac miller: that’s on me, everybody

nothing but thieves: amsterdam

bren joy: sweet

back number: i love you

mac ayres: next to you, roses

daniel caesar: blessed, ocho rios, get you (ft. kali uchis), take me away (ft. syd), do you like me?, disillusioned

green day: dilemma

puma blue: already falling

bruno major: nothing, easily, places we won’t walk, the most beautiful thing, old soul

[kvetchinglyneurotic]

🌹🌹🌹🌹 for whenever needed :)

I wrote this in a haze last night when I should have been sleeping and I'm not sure if I'll ever expand it into a proper fic, so I'm sticking it here. Part of it is under the cut because it's a) long and b) is about Jamie's Amsterdam story

Roy makes it about a week before it all comes spilling out. They've been playing shit, 'cause Lasso may have rediscovered Total Football but he sure as shit hasn't rediscovered how to coach it, and if he's being perfectly fucking honest neither has Roy. Or maybe he would, if fucking when I was fourteen... didn't keep playing on loop in his head. He picks Jamie up from his front door every day and he's grinning, bouncing around like the chipper twat he is, twenty-five and whole, and all Roy can think about is the twiggy kid he had been, hair stuck up in every direction and mud smeared on his shins. He'd dug up pictures, is the thing, that first night back — got home aching and more exhausted than he'd been after a full ninety minutes back in his player days, and instead of going to sleep he'd dug around through the depths of City's website, through a mountain of those bullshit player profiles he refused to do but Jamie loved, 'til he found a picture of the Man City 2010 U16s. Recognized Jamie right away, the big dark eyes and prickish smirk and long sleeves 'cause the muppet always got cold. And he was a fucking child. A tiny, scrawny little lad, must've been one of the youngest on the team the way most of the others dwarfed him. No one could ever have mistaken him for an adult, not that it would've been any less abjectly fucking horrifying if he'd looked like a full-grown man by the age of thirteen.

Ted corners him in the office. Or rather, Ted knocks on the door while he's got his head in his hands and the lights off, same as he has every evening since Amsterdam. Pokes his head in with his jacket already on and his bag slung over his shoulder, says, "You know I'm always ready for a late night special on the go session of the Diamond Dogs but if sitting in the dark's what gets your brain juices going, I can respect that. Just make sure to skeddaddle on out of here before our good friends over in maintenance come lock up; I love this place but a night with a locker room aroma ain't to anyone's taste," and Roy says, "Jamie told me he was raped in Amsterdam." They both freeze, Ted in the doorway with that stupid folksy smile still fixed on his face, Roy with his elbows planted on the desk and his fingers twisted through his hair. He feels sick. Jamie's already been violated and now Roy's gone and done it again, just fucking spilled his private trauma without permission 'cause he couldn't handle it. "What?" Ted asks, breathless. "He told you— he was— he told you in Amsterdam, or it happened—" "Fucking both," Roy grinds out. "Oh." Ted's gone so pale he's almost grey. "He seemed fine on the bus." "Not when we were there." Roy says. "I mean, he told me when we were there. Happened when he was fourteen. Don't think he knows that's what—" he sucks in a deep breath, not that it does jack shit to make him feel better. "But it is. That's what happened, and now I don't know what the fuck to do."