#when i looked at my mother and told her how much i despise her i felt a shiver of happiness. righteousness.
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snowywolf1005 · 2 days ago
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ASL X MOTHER READER
Sabo finds out his mother death.
Two years ago, Sabo and Koala came back from their trip, and they're returning to Baltigo. When they went inside, they saw people running in the hallways.
Sabo doesn't know what's going on. "Oh, chief of staff! You came at the right time!"
"Come to the situation room now!"
"The Paramount War between the Navy and the whitebeard pirate has ended!" Everyone was reading about the outcome of the Summit War of Marineford.
"A kaiju was Paramount War?!" Everyone was shocked, "it says shin godzilla, use atomic breath, and blast the war before dapeare"
"The navy has a lot of casualties, too. Seems like it was a hard battle as expected."
"What about ivan-san?! Is she alright?!"
"It doesn't say she died or anything"
"The one who died in the war is..."
"(L/N)... (Y/N)..."
Sabo heart dropped when he heard that name.
"What?! (Y/N) the devil child?! Nobody heard from her!"
"Yeah, it said... she died from protecting fire fist ace and Straw Hat luffy."
"But more importantly, Dragon-san, look..."
"Is it true?! Is straw hat luffy your son?!"
"Hm? Yes, he is." Said dragon, everyone was shocked. Sabo picked up the newspaper and saw her face, her smiling face. Sabo eyes went wide, and he began to remember.
"I'm gonna become a pirate... and defeat others and become infamous! It'll be the only proof of my life! It doesn't matter if all people in the world reject me or despise me!"
Sabo started to remember ace voice.
"A boy would be the son of royal. But you, sabo. Shall be mine."
He rember his mother voice, and rember how she sang him lullaby. Sabo slams the desk as he begins to tear up. "Sabo-kun, what's wrong?! You're acting strange!" Koala asks.
"I can't believe that Ace was Gold' Roger's son... and (Y/N) was his step mom..."
"It says that luffy was also his (Y/N) stepmother..."
"Did you guys know?! They say Akainu punched a hole right through her body! (Y/N) was the government want a hands-on."
Sabo cries and cries when he remembers another memory.
"We can become brothers if we exchange this cup of sake!" Said ace.
"Brothers?! Really?!" Luffy asks.
"When we become pirates, we might not be on the same ship, but our brotherhood will always be with us! So, from now on, we're brothers!"
"Yeah!"
"Are you alright, sabo?!" Hack asks, sabo still tearing up, then he let out a scream, yelling.
"MAMA!!!!!"
"Sabo-kun!"
"Sabo!"
'Now I know... the one who died wasn't some unknown person... she wasn't just a threat in the pirate era that needed to be eliminated! Or be the world government slave!' Sabo thought, remembering all the memories of his mother.
"Sabo, welcome home!"
"(Y/N) is my... mother!"
A few years passed, and sabo went his mother grave, with much flowers and notes on them.
"I finally... managed to get here... mom." sabo put the flower down, then he took out some newspaper. " Look at this. Luffy started to make his way to become the king of the pirate again. And ace join in, too."
"It's so ironic. Since you've been gone, the old memories keep recurring to me vividly. I now belong to the Revolutionary Army."
"My colleague, ivankov, told me what happened in marineford in detail. And... how... you sacrifice yourself."
"I guess you, luffy, and Ace are mad at me." Sabo started to cry, "I couldn't go save you... I'm sorry! I wish... I wish I could've seen you again while you were alive! I'm gonna inherit your will!" He said.
"Luffy and ace is our family!" Sabo, stand up and walk out.
Now, sabo knows about his mother past and her home. His goal is to find her home before the government finds it.
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edelorion · 6 months ago
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#edel vents#disclaimer: really personal issues in the tags. also wishes of death upon others. this is PROBABLY too much information tbh...#so if you're not up for it scroll down fast!!!! the deluge is coming!!!#today was... eventful. bad. also very bad. grandma's birthday celebration was today#and while she... definitely has Old People Issues (racist) shes also very lonely since the death of my grandfather so i can't really not go#i'm the only one who really visits her regularly to begin with#aside from the... very serious racism issue... she's “alright”. i guess. but that's besides the point. there's family there#and among those... my parents. which i don't like to talk to#discovered they threw more of my old stuff away. typical. wanted to strangle them. as usual.#had to “talk” with my mother (read: spend approximately ten seconds reciting exactly why i *don't* talk to her anymore)#so that whole ordeal completely soured my mood.#went home tired. can't really do anything right now.#at least the food was good i guess. but i also really want to cry... which i can't. which sucks.#...i really like to think i've improved as a person. i used to be really hateful of everything and everyone#worst of all myself. still kinda do but i'm... getting better..?#i like to think i've grown past most of it but every time i see my parents i feel this gripping at my heart. as if i haven't really changed#as if instead i'm still the hateful person i “always was” deep down... bc there's this visceral joy that i feel whenever i'm mad at them.#when i looked at my mother and told her how much i despise her i felt a shiver of happiness. righteousness.#to be clear: i do NOT care for her. at all. she's the worst person on this earth#and the only person whom my philosophy of “nobody deserves to die” does NOT apply to. i'm not scared of hating her.#she genuinely deserves this. but...every time i see my parents - and thus her... i feel as if i'm slipping back into that mindset of hatred#i don't want that. not anymore. it consumed me whole. i was a horrible person back then and i've caused so much grief for so many#i can't let go of this hatred. i can't forgive them. they don't deserve my forgiveness anyway. but i'm tired of hating.#i'm tired of letting that hatred define me. i'm tired of letting that hatred direct me. i'm tired of letting it bring me to ruin.#i'm tired of being who i was. i'm no longer “that”. i'm edel now and i'm happy for people now. if i don't like something i just walk out.#i can just leave. “if it sucks hit the bricks” right?.. but i didn't. i had to say it. i had to tell them. her. and i liked it.#and... i'm scared of that. because it tells me i haven't improved.#i'm not sure what i'm expecting out of posting this i guess. maybe help. maybe i wanna be told that this is normal or something.#maybe i just want to get my thoughts in order. i don't know. i'm gonna stop writing now.#sorry for making you read all this. thanks for doing it anyway. tags were cut off on this one btw so it may look like a mess. but. yeah.
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abyssalpriest · 1 year ago
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Working with Leviathan be like
Leviathan: *completely both rewrites a severe trauma trigger back into something neutral and freeing, and further reconnects me to the Sky and myself off plane and pre-incarnation in the space of 24 hours* yeah nice, anyway we should play video games now I'm tired
#ramblings //#Emphasis on he works over the span of months but he really is a uh... A pool of water that doesn't drip into your mind until you open the#door. And you think you will be drowned when you do but he is so soothing. And he walks with you#And sometimes what he walks you through is really painful and it's like what the actual fuck am I doing but he stays there like#duh it's what I said would happen it's fine trust me#And you do and then it's like. Holy shit. Look what I walked through. Hope you're proud of me#leviathan //#ramblings //#Anyway. Friendship ended with Despise A Certain Game now Ending Of The Game Where She's Soothed And The Rain Fades is my friend#And. I didn't realise how much I'd become afraid to talk about me. I talk about Leviathan all the time as the sky but I don't.... Like#talking about myself as a part of the day sky and what that means. I have. Thanks to him. Had gateways opened to astral memories#that I was too scared to touch and.... I'm.... I think I'm ready to start recorroborating my info between brains in astral and physical#bodies..... I think..... I'm ready I'm... I am So fucking End Of Game Where Rain Fades right now and that makes me want to fucking bawl my#eyes out because a) I wasn't allowed in the cult I was in to go near that part of the game bc they told me the character there was alive and#she hated my guts and thought I was disgusting. And b) god the storyline involving her is just so so so so so relevant to my life post-cult#:( you know. Just :(#Diary //#The child returns to her mother the cycle is done the rain clears the ocean is infinite the workings of the cult I mean church are undone#And that doesn't scare me anymore? The cult was so.... Had me thinking that any time that game was brought up they were in control of it#and they would see me and it was their game and they made it alone and I could never just enjoy it as a video game.... It#Still hurts a little but leviathan walked me through allowing it to be neutral and admitting that I see myself in it. Because I tried my#hardest to not admit that thinking that if I did they'd be in my head but mo#No* it's... Its a communal thing. It's allowed to be relatable to a wide audience for neutral reasons. I don't have to break down when I see#it. And I'm allowed to talk about the Sky and I'm allowed to talk about where and when I met Leviathan and I'm allowed to not hide what I do#with him because others may take it as gross exaggerations for bragging rights - I'm allowed to be neutral. Just because at one point in my#life I thought astral projection was only for a select few does not mean now that I do it I have to hide it in case someone like me#takes their insecurity so far that they see my neutral declarations as an attack on them............. Anyway#The Day Sky. My beloved. You mean so much to me. I won't forget my purpose in this incarnation I will not hide it#Thanks Lev#I love that arguably calling him Lev is more controversial than calling him Tengri but it's Not just a nickname lmfao
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earth4angels · 5 months ago
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𝐝𝐚𝐫𝐥𝐢𝐧𝐠, 𝐢'𝐥𝐥 𝐰𝐚𝐢𝐭 𝐟𝐨𝐫 𝐲𝐨𝐮.
jacaerys velaryon x aunt!targaryen reader ͟ ͟ ͟ friends to lovers, sexual content but no smut, incest (reader is aunt), fluff, semi angst(?), aemond being dumb, jace knows how to fight, i refuse to believe laenor never taught his kids how to defend themselves. slight switch of povs, basically the dinner fight, but added my own take, not edited.
summary: after the accident in driftmark the relationship between y/n and jacaerys became distant, when it came to the petition of the heir to driftmark, feelings came back full force. it took a bloody fight yet again to get jacaerys to act on his feelings before it was too late. but also, to unite the house of the dragon.
a/n: um? this is probably more than 1k words, i really went in. i had so much fun writing this & gosh.. do i have the guts to expand their relationship BUT ANYWAYS ENJOYYYY
somewhat based on this request. jace tag list: @jacaerysgf, @star611, @jules420, @gracexthoughts, @astrxq, @reyndaisy, @hxtd
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For as long as Jacaerys can remember, he had always felt deep affection for his dearest aunt who was no more than a year older.
At first, it started with a childish admiration for how she spoke to him, how she would run her fingers through his curls when he would run towards her after sword training, read stories about the doom, or Visenya who she claimed was the best warrior to ever exist. Jacaerys admired her, she was his favorite aunt not that he had many but besides Helaena, she was his favorite. Again, it started with a childish crush. The smallfolk had a joke spread about how if anyone wanted to find Y/N, one had to look for small Jacaerys who followed closely behind her like a pup.
She never minded the talk, she loved her siblings and her nephews, it was one thing that differed her from her own brothers, who grew to despise the Velaryon boys. She loved Jacaerys, the way he always spoke of his growing bond with Vermax, the small adventures they would take to the gardens, or the adventures they took through the secret passages, and the library. She especially loved the moments he would sneak her strawberry cakes during her high valyrian studies when no one was looking. To her, Jacaerys was so dear to her heart, she dreamed childishly how it would be if they married.
She never understood why the hatred grew to the point everything that pointed toward her older sister was prohibited. Her siblings never had a close relationship with their father, but she did, she enjoyed the stories her father told her, but she mostly loved building and painting his replica of the seven kingdoms with him. Her father, King Viserys had always talked to her about protecting their own, as it was said, the House of the Dragon had to stay together to hold the realm united.
"Damn bastard," Aemond muttered under his breath as he rushed past her dusting his now muddy training gear. She narrowed her eyes at her brother, the word bringing her to wince. It was not the first time she heard it, at the age of 6, her mother had prohibited her from spending time with her half-sister and her children since the fight at Driftmark. She understood why, but she could not bring herself to be cold towards her half-family.
"Brother, enough." Y/n had her hand up to his shoulder, Aemond's one eye glared at her, "You must learn to let go of this anger, it is treason to speak of that word out loud."
Aemond scoffed, "Of course, my dear sister, protecting the bastards, you still defend them after what they did to me?" Aemond had snatched his eyepatch from his eye, showing its bright blue glow of a gem towards her.
"Brother... we were all children! Luce was only protec-" She choked as she was now slammed against the wall, a hand tight around her neck, she wildly stared at him, alarmed.
"Protecting? Dear sister, you are more than a fool. You rather protect bastards than the blood of the dragon?" Aemond chuckled in disbelief, "You, the same as father are fools."
He let go of her as she slumped against the wall, her hand clasped around her throat as she heaved, trying to get air back into her lungs. She watched teary-eyed from the loss of air the shadows of her brother grow distant with the further he went down the hall.
"Y/n?" a voice spoke from the opposite side of the hall. She looked back to meet the face of her once-best friend. "Seven hells! What happened?!"
Jacaerys rushed towards her, lifting her carefully as if she were the most fragile jewel to exist. In a sense to Jacaerys, she was.
She blinked, confused as to where he had come from. The last time she saw him, they were children, and he had promised to write her, yet after five ravens, the letters stopped, causing her to believe he had grown to hate her for what happened that night. It was then she realized why Aemond was so upset, why her mother suddenly left her and Heleana from embroidery to attend the council. Her mother avoided greeting her half-sister. Today was the petition of who was going to take over Driftmark. The house of the dragon was united once again, but not in the way she wanted to.
"Nephew?" She asked, confused again.
"Come, sit here. Let me get you some water," Jacaerys had placed her in the comfort of the shade of a tree. He had removed his cloak, placing it on the ground for her to sit as he ran to get her water. She stayed in silence beside her dry coughs that slipped once in a while. Jacaerys appeared again with a glass of water, she muttered a soft thank you before she drank till her throat was once again free from the harsh itches.
She looked toward him, finding him looking at her softly, his eyes burying themselves in the soft lilac color of her eyes. She blushed, coughing to avoid looking at him instead she focused on the grass beside her, picking at it softly.
"So... care to explain why you have a red mark on your neck?"
Y/n bit the inside of her cheek before she focused her stare on the blank blue sky, if Jacaerys was not paying attention he would have missed the soft murmur of her voice, "It was nothing."
Jacaerys opened his mouth to argue when the bells of the castle banged so hard that they echoed through the hallways.
"Don't think I won't let this go y/n," he spoke softly beside her, she only blinked in response. He shook his head as his tongue touched the roof of his mouth and he let go, making a sound that almost sounded like a click.
"You should go, my sister would probably be worried as to why you are taking so long. It is rude to keep your mother waiting."
Jacaerys rolled his eyes, before he lifted a hand towards her, a gesture for her to grab onto it. She stared at his pale hand, taking a moment to admire the changes, he was muscular now, and no more stood the boy who almost looked easy to push around. She followed the path of his hand toward his face, her breath hitching when she realized he still wore the necklace she had made him when they were children.
"You... you kept it?" Y/n stuttered, pointing to his neck. Jacaerys hummed, touching it delicately, his fingers rubbing softly at the soft shells. She had made that the day of Laena's funeral, she went and followed the path towards the beach to find seashells. She made it in hopes for him to feel better. She never thought he would keep it after all those years.
"Why wouldn't I?"
She stood up on her own avoiding his touch in fear she might want to curl into the safety of his hold.
“Go figure. You stopped writing to me.”
“What?” Jacaerys stood in front of her, stopping her from stepping another step further from him, “I never stopped? What do you mean I stopped? I sent so many ravens to you. I never heard from you after the fourth or fifth one.”
Now she was confused. “I sent you ravens too! You never sent me any back, I waited… I figured you just blamed me for what happened,” she muttered.
Jacaerys did another click with his tongue, before he reached out to her, her small hands fitting perfectly well inside his.
“Whatever happened that night, it’s forgotten. We were children, you were not even there for me to blame you. Aemond being your brother changes nothing, I still care for you just as much as I did when I was a child.”
She tightened the hold of his hands between hers before looking into his eyes, all she found was a soft gaze, not anything that was malicious, as she would find mostly in Aemond’s eye.
She opened her mouth, then closed it, she did not want to tell him how she felt for him. It was like Jacaerys had read her mind, though he was one year behind her, he always looked after her, to Jacaerys - she was everything he wanted in a wife, and he dreamed of making her as such.
“I’ve missed you, did you not?” he lifted one hand to caress her braid that was left falling off her shoulder to slowly reaching for her cheek where he held her delicately once again.
Y/n smiled, the fluttering feeling in her stomach making it hard to not release a giggle, she felt home.
“Of course I did Jace, I missed you so much.”
Ser Arryk spoke from the entrance of the garden, his armor glittering with the rays of the sun reflecting it, “Princess? The queen is expecting you in the grand hall.”
She nodded, feeling regretful of not spending more time with Jace, she had so much to tell him, to get caught up on.
“Thank you Ser Arryk, I will be there in a minute.”
She looked towards Jace again finding him still looking at her, a glint of mischief flashed, she narrowed her eyes making him smirk, “I guess you have to go aunt.”
The way he said it made her want to clench her thighs together, she cleared her throat, “I’ll see you soon my dearest nephew.”
He laughed like the word from her mouth was the biggest joke he had heard. His curls bouncing with the shake of his body, he reached down for her hand, placing a lingering kiss, “Princess.”
She watched as he turned, walking towards the grand hall passing Ser Arryk who bowed his head. Her stomach was still fluttering, all she wanted to do was jump and roll in the comfort of her bed, but she needed to meet her family and yet again witness another rift between the family.
"Her children," a long pause echoed through the grand hall, Y/n had her hands interlaced with each other, squeezing them so hard her skin was becoming white. She quickly glanced around the room, noticing her brothers smirking with anticipation, to her half-sister's family. She came across the eyes of her prince, who looked seconds from using his sharp sword to kill. She licked her lips, the anxiety building, she knew what was coming, and honestly, she was looking forward to it.
"ARE BASTARDS! And she is, a whore," Vaemond exclaimed.
Echoes of gasps and murmurs were heard, but Y/n blocked it as it all happened quickly. The blood splattered harshly like a quick burst of wind splashing her dark emerald dress. She gasped, her body being pulled back by Aegon who quickly acted to wipe off the blood off her dress and the little that landed on her face.
She would lie if she said she did not enjoy what she saw, in fact, she was glad it happened. That word being tossed around needed to be acted with a consequence, and she was proud of Daemon for warning those who followed Vaemond in speaking of her family that way.
The court ended and she was left rushed to her chambers, her ladies-in-waiting rushing to prepare a quick bath as her father requested them to have dinner together.
"You all can go," y/n spoke as she untied the laces off her dress.
"Princess-" Elydia, her closest handmaiden reached towards her to help her protested.
"Please, I need to have some moments alone, I will notify when finished."
"Princess."
She sighed, the weight on her shoulders becoming too heavy, she rolled her head side to side to relieve the pain. As she sunk into the rose-covered bath, moaning in bliss from the warmth she was sunken into, a knock was heard from her bed chamber. A familiar series of knocks, one that she missed hearing, sparking a rush of adrenaline.
She rushed to throw on a light blue gown, her hair soaking the silk material, making her breasts noticeable. Her footsteps were rushed as she reached the familiar wall by her bed, she knocked a similar tune before she pushed into it.
Jacaerys stood behind the wall, in his hands laid a wooden box with letters, her letters.
"Hi," he spoke softly, his voice sending butterflies all over her body
"Hi," she moved aside to let him enter her room, her eyes flickering quickly to the door of her room before eyeing the male before her, "What are you doing here? If my guards, see you... the scandal we could be in!"
He smirked, his plum juicy lips - she did not want to stare so much but she could not help observing him - quirked to the side, "That did not stop us when we were children."
She scoffed, "You said it yourself when we were children."
He smiled mockingly before he stopped in his tracks. He did not expect to see her so... vulnerable. The fantasies started to play out in his mind, he recalled all those moments he thought of her late at night. The fire ignited inside of him when he saw her in the garden, her hair flowing through the wind, her soft features to her soft lilac eyes.
Jacaerys wanted to propose to her mother a betrothal, to finally make y/n his, to act out all the fantasies he thought when she appeared in his mind.
"Jace?" She whispered, feeling self-conscious about the way he stared at her. He looked ready to bounce, his brown eyes scanning her up and down, she squeezed her thighs together.
"You... aunt I can see you wholly," he cleared his throat to avoid his voice sounding so raspy.
"Excuse me?" Y/n was confused until he gestured to her body, "Oh... Oh!" Her cheeks blossomed with a deep scarlet red tint; she rushed across the room to grab her robe tightly wrapping it around her body.
Jacaerys cleared his throat again, "Um... I just wanted to stop by before we saw each other at dinner again, the letters you had sent me."
Her cheeks still stained with red walked towards him, gathering the box between her hands, "So what with it?"
"I received and sent you letters y/n. I never stopped writing to you, I even made Mother annoyed with how many times I have asked her if there was ever anything sent to me."
She blinked her confusion, "Jacaerys I always wrote to you, your letters never came but I always sent you updates how things were here - "
"I know of everything, but I am giving you complete honesty on the fact that I never stopped," he stepped towards her, his hand on her cheek with his thumb rubbing soft circles calming her.
"What do you want me to do with that information? Do you know how much our families hate each other? How much Aemond goes around cursing Luce's name, your name? I shouldn't even be talking to yo-"
She stopped when he stepped closer, she felt his breath on her lips, her eyes darted down his lips to his eyes. Her breath hitched, he was so close. So close, she just wanted to taste how soft his lips truly were.
"Tell me to go, and I will. I will never bother you again, but tell me, you never want to see me, and I will."
Jacaerys hoped she never spoke of the words, as he wanted to kiss her, to tell her of the once confession he wrote in those many letters. She was just so pretty; he wanted to steal her and take her to Dragonstone where he wanted to marry her. He wanted to taste the sweetness between her legs, to have her scream, moan out his name, to fill her belly with the future heirs of Westeros.
His hand stayed on her cheek as he continued to stare, waiting for her to speak. Her breaths came out shallow and she began to shake with need.
"Don't go," she whispered, her hands reaching to grab his shoulders, pulling him closer towards her, "Please don't leave me."
"Gods," he wrapped his arms around her as he shakingly asked her, afraid she will finally reject him, but he hoped, "Can I kiss you?"
She gasped, the dazed look in her eyes fading as she began to pull away, "No... No... we can't Jacaerys! We are not betrothed, we are not promised to each other, my virtue could be quest-"
Her rambles were left to the old gods to wonder as Jacaerys placed his lips on her, "No offense, but you talk a lot."
She groaned against his lips at the jab he made but melted into the kiss, a kiss she longed for as the feelings that she did not want to admit surfaced. She only read books about the acts of kissing, yet she felt as if she knew with the way she kissed Jacaerys.
Her core suddenly felt tingly with how he was holding her, his hand deep inside her hair as the other ran down the silk of her gown to hitch a leg around his waist as he guided her down her bed.
"Jace..." she moaned, her throat begging for air as she pulled away, yet he did not stop, his lips trailing down her cheeks, prepping her with soft kisses to finally nipping at her throat. She moaned again.
"I have always wanted to do this," he whispered against her throat, "I badly want to take you, to have you sore, so fucked out of your mind that you forget your own name," he raised his head, his elbow by her head to prep himself just so he can look down at her.
She breathed heavily, "You..." she reached out, "You can't..."
"I would never dishonor you that way, but I will fight to make you, my wife. I will speak to mother, to my grandsire."
"Jace..."
He placed a kiss on her nose, smiling when she let out a giggle, "Tell me you also want me."
"I never wanted to admit it, but I do, I have always wanted you."
A knock disturbed their sweet bubble, and they both scrambled away from each other as y/n pulled her gown down. Jacaerys grabbed his cloak she did not even realize he had removed as he moved to the secret passage again.
"Princess? The queen requests your presence, dinner will start shortly."
She looked at Jacaerys as he whispered, "I will see you soon aunt." Y/n rolled her eyes but still smiled as she nodded.
The wall closed, and as if nothing happened, the room became quiet once again, she gathered her thoughts as she replied, "Almost done, please help me dress Elydia."
The entire time she was prepped for dinner she was smiling to herself. She could not wait to see her prince again. She had even requested for her hair to be loose, just two small braids creating a crown decorated her. She had wanted to look perfect for him.
Dinner was awkward, to say the least. Her family was beyond divided, as she sat beside Helaena, it was too quiet, the only noises came from the cooks who were walking around to place the food on the table. She watched as Aemond sent nonstop glares towards her nephews.
She had found out through Helaena that Aemond had lost against Jacaerys during training. Jacaerys had taken his sword one minute into sparring. It finally made sense why Aemond was so upset when she came across him in the garden. Her lips tugged into a quiet snicker at the idea of her brother being put in his place.
As she drank her wine, her father spoke.
"It pains me to see our family divided. As the house of the dragon, we must be united to have the kingdom prosper in peace. All of you must leave behind your childish arguments! Do it for me, your father, your brother, your husband, your grandsire. Leave behind this anger!"
As her older sister stood to make a toast in hopes of making peace with her mother, she made eye contact with Jacaerys who was already looking at her. He smiled softly at her before he looked towards his mother, his mouth turning into a smirk as he hid it behind his glass of wine. Her eyebrows furrowed, and as she was going to question her sister's voice came through.
"... It has been decided for the good of our families, and to make the future of House Targaryen stronger, that Princess Y/n, and my son, Prince Jacaerys be wed. They shall be in the future the King and Queen of the Seven Kingdoms."
Alicent shot up from her chair, "What?!"
Viserys wheezed but held strong as he banged his hands onto the table preventing an argument once again, "I wholeheartedly agree to this proposal as my dearest grandson himself asked to be wed to my beautiful daughter. They are to be wed as soon as possible."
Y/n couldn't help but smile widely, "Thank you, father," she looked towards her oldest sister, "Sister."
"Har! Har! Har!" Daemon raised his glass with a mischief glint in his eyes, his mouth into a wide smirk, he enjoyed seeing Alicent and Otto Hightower's plans get ruined.
Her mother could not argue against the newest betrothal since the King had officially declared it. She also had made peace with her once close friend as they toasted to each other. However, that did not stop her brothers from having a mind of their own, their mouths ready to retaliate.
As the night passed, and her father was no longer there to hold the peace, she held her breath as she knew, no she felt the anger boiling from her family. Aegon was the first to let out jests, and with that followed Aemond who did not hold back.
Jacaerys stood, his hand slammed into his uncle's shoulders to sit him back onto his seat, "You will keep your mouth shut about my betrothed. Jest all you want about me, but my wife-to-be, you will keep shut. Understood?"
Aegon snickered, satisfied with the reaction, he lifted his hands up in surrender.
She did not want to admit how it ignited such a need for her soon-to-be husband. She has never found him any hotter than what he looked like. His curls covered his dark gaze, his veiny long hands clasped together as to hold himself back.
"Boys. Enough. Let's finish dinner without any more arguments." Rhaenyra spoke in hopes of stopping the tension that was boiling.
It was enough for a moment. As Lucerys snickered at the pig that was placed on the table, in hopes for his uncle to join in the fun, as he believed it was an innocent act of jest. The blood came and what was a peaceful dinner, turned into the dragon's war.
"I dare you to say that again," Jace spoke from beside her, his hand holding hers to calm himself.
"Are you not proud of your house, dear nephew?" Aemond mocked, Aegon snickered, as the adults surrounding them stopped their dinner to hear what was going on, "I thought you considered yourself a strong knight."
A growl-like rumble came from Jacaerys as he rushed to punch her brother over and over. She scrambled towards them, yelling for them to stop, Aemond had gotten two hits through, but Jacaerys had the upper hand as his knuckles were bloodied. The guards had come to pull her brothers and nephews apart.
"Enough! All of you, back to your chambers! Now!" Rhaenyra spoke, sending them to their rooms. Y/n felt the angry tears stream down from the exhaustion of the fights between her family.
She yelped when a hand pulled her into the shadows of pillars. With a scream stuck in her throat, she widened her eyes at Jacaerys who had his hand on her mouth to stop her from screaming.
"Come back home with me, we will marry before the old gods," he whispered.
"But if I leave, I can potentially make mother and grandsire even more mad..."
"You are already promised to me, the realm will soon learn of it, ravens are being sent as we speak. Nothing will be able to stop our union, please. Just come home with me."
She hoped she was not making a mistake, for she loved Jacaerys so much more than waiting around for her family to come between her happiness. She only hoped, this union, would unite the realm and stop any possible war that Helaena had spoken of. As she kissed Jacaerys in the shadows, the said sister smiled as she poked another thread into a gown to continue the embroidery.
"From the blood of red and green, the pain will end as the union will bring peace once again."
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chilumi-shipper · 6 days ago
Note
A prompt came into mind.. up to you if you're interested.
So, character and reader got married but character cheated because he said he doesn't love the reader anymore. They're technically done, but haven't finished doing the divorce files (because it's expensive and takes a long long time). But.. character got into an accident.. which made him forget everything that happened recently, and only remember the days he loved the reader. Reader's conflicted, the mistress that character has doesn't know what to do either. Character was confused on why he would marry anyone else when he has the reader fo begin with.
I think this fits your styles.
Btw, I LOVE ALL YOUR STORIES! I RE-READ THEM EVERYDAY-
Someone Better
Childe x Fem!Reader
Summary: Childe was a wild spirit, so when he got bored of your relationship, he sought the excitement of another woman. You were heartbroken, ultimately asking for a divorce. But just as your connection was almost severed, he got into an accident, losing every memory of his infidelity and returning to the man that made you fall in love him.
Tags: Cheating, Amnesia, Pining, Angst/No Comfort
~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~
You were staring at the tremendous amount of divorce paperwork sitting on the desk of your hotel room.
It was very complicated, five years of marriage with joined insurance, property, bank accounts, and now you have to meticulously separate all your joined assets, all while constantly on the verge of a breakdown.
Not to mention you had no family to stay with in Snezhnaya. There's absolutely no one you could talk to about everything, you've left your homeland thinking your future in the cold nation with the love of your life would be nothing less that fantasy.
As you rest your head on the desk and closed your eyes tightly to ease the headache, your ears perk up as loud knocks hit your door.
With a groan, you got up and opened it to reveal your two of Childe's older siblings.
"He's looking for you." The older sister said, Alevtina, her seriousness evident, looking at you somewhat panicked.
"I know, big si-" I paused for a moment, closing my eyes and rubbing my temples. "I'm working on the assets, I'll send it as soon as possible."
"No." The chilly tone of the older brother, Alexei, sent shivers down your spine. "You need to come with us."
...
"Big sister Y/N is here?" You hear Teucer's innocent voice as you enter their home. The younger children laid their eyes on you, seemingly eager to come closer, but perhaps they've been told that now would not be the time.
"Honey... Thank you for coming..." Their mother embraced you warmly, still accepting you with motherly affection. "Oh dear, I'm so sorry..."
"Mama, has he calmed down?" Alexei asked from behind you.
Your mother-in-law parts from you slightly, looking at you tenderly. "She will definitely help."
You put your confusion and questions aside, seeing the somewhat tense air within the house.
"Stop staring." You weren't looking at him, but you felt his eyes watching you set down a tray of soup and medicine on his bedside table.
Childe lets out a chuckle. "Sorry, love, I can't help it..." His eyes never faltered, containing a look of admiration that you've been unfamiliar with for so long.
"After the avalanche, I got a pretty bad head injury. When I woke up, you were the first thing on my mind. And when Mama said you weren't here with me, I freaked out."
You sat down on a chair next to his bed, your eyes observing the bandages wrapped around his head. "What did the doctor say about your injury?"
"I'm gonna get some very bad headaches, and I also got a bit of amnesia, I think." Childe looks as if he's in thought. "Do I seem like I forgot something?"
"Maybe some things..."
"But I love you just the same! So I bet what I forgot wasn't even that important!"
...How cruel.
Having to take care of the man that broke you apart, even worse, a version of him that you loved too much to despise.
~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~
It was painful, staying with him.
Childe would keep you close, call you his different pet names, cuddle up to you, all while you were under the pitiful gaze of his family that knew of his infidelity.
On the other hand, he's been feeling the cold responses his advances have been receiving. But to him, he thinks he can solve it by smothering you in more of his love.
He is pretty observant, he's put it two in two together that he may be missing a memory in which he had done something wrong. He just didn't know how much it had hurt.
Though, not only from you, Childe had also felt that his younger siblings seem distant as well, no longer asking him to play snow games outside, or looking up to him as some sort of hero.
One early morning, when he walks up to the kitchen to see you cooking for the whole family, a smile formed on his face.
He steps closer, wrapping his muscular arms around your waist. "Hmmm... Morning, honey..." He basks in the feeling of you.
You remain quiet, letting him do as he pleases. The ginger frowns, however, feeling unsatisfied by your lack of reaction.
"Babyyyy... Loveee meee backkkk..." He whines, nuzzling his face on your neck.
"Ajax, come on..." You stifled a laugh, moving slightly away as his action tickled you. He hears the slight giggle of your words, smiling against your skin.
You compose yourself, pushing him away from you. "Stop." He lets you push him away, and you feel him freeze slightly at the harshness of your tone.
His blue eyes looked at you worried. "...Hey," He starts. "I'm sorry, darling, did you not like that?"
With a sigh, you looked down. "When the others wake up, tell them I already made breakfast. I have somewhere to be."
You walk pass him, but you did not miss the hurt tone of the faint call of your name.
...
You come back to his family's home after doing some more paperwork for the divorce that your husband doesn't even remember, feeling your head pounding as you ready yourself to face him again.
What you don't expect to see this late at night is Childe sitting on the porch with a lantern next to him, his head hung low as if he's thinking deeply.
"Childe?"
He looks up, but he frowns at you. "Ajax, darling..." He reminds you.
Standing up, he pulls you into his warm embrace. "I love you... I missed you..."
His words take you aback, as you reluctantly wrap your arms around him.
"I've been thinking about this morning, about you. You hate me."
"I know I must've done something... you can tell me." He kneels in front of you, staring at your eyes while his sparkle with the light of the lantern. "And even if I don't remember, I'll make it right..."
As you look down at him, you see the fiery passion of love that burned in his eyes as he knelt down to ask you to marry him so long ago.
It scares you...
You might not be able to control yourself...
"It's just hard to take care of you sometimes." You smile ever so slightly, yet his frown only deepens as tears start to escape your eyes.
He stands, his hand finds its way to your cheek. "Love..." His eyes held such conviction that you've not seen for years. "I'm so sorry..."
You close your eyes to hold in the tears, shaking your head and swaying his hand away. "...You're not."
Despite the tears, you tug at his arm. "Come on, let's head inside."
He's filled with questions, but seeing your sad face makes him set all those aside and focus on you for now.
~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~
"Teucer, hey, little man." Childe calls for his little brother.
The little boy looks at him wide eyed. "I don't want to talk to you." He crossed his little arms, turning around to leave with a displeased look.
"What...? Oh come on..." The harbinger pouted, getting down on his little brother's level. "What did I do wrong...? All our siblings are acting so mean to me..." He whined, frowning as he tries to persuade the little ginger.
"But you were also very very mean!" Teucer refused to look at his older brother, the one he used to look up to the most. "We don't like you anymore!"
Childe's playful facade faded as his expression contorted to a confused one. "Hey, what do you mean...?"
"You're so mean to Y/N, you hurt her! She doesn't deserve tha-"
"Teucer!" Just as his brother erupted to a crying mess, screaming at him with all his little heart, their mother walked into the room, grabbing the little boy.
"Don't talk like that to your elders!"
"But it's true, Mama!"
"That doesn't matter, say sorry to-"
"What does he mean, Mama? Why did I do?" Childe looked at his mother expectantly, his voice starting to shake as he saw the fit of rage Teucer had because of him. "W-What did I do to Y/N?"
HIs mother shook her head, trying to ease her expression with a smile. "Nothing..."
"It's not nothing, Mama!" He raises his voice by accident due to his frustration. "I see it, the way she looks at me, it's different. The way you all look at me, like you have a monster inside your house."
Teucer forced his way out of his mother's hold, running to his older siblings room all teary eyed. Childe felt bad, but he desperately needed answers from his mother.
"Mama, please, I need to know why Y/N doesn't... love me anymore..." It hurts him to say, but based on the way you're acting, he could only make the assumption that your feelings have wavered.
"Oh, Ajax... it's not like that..."
The ginger then felt a sharp pain in his head, making him fall down onto the couch. He groaned as he clutched his head.
"Hey... where are you heading off to so late at night?" He hears your soft voice in a static audio playing in his head.
"Out." He then hears himself replying coldly.
"Ohh, when will you-"
He's out the door before you could even finish your question.
"Ajax, honey!' His mother's voice was a hazy blur as he keeps his eyes closed to envision what he's hearing in his head.
He tries to shake the feeling away, but his mind is flooded by fragmented memories.
"You've been going out a lot more recently." Your concerned voice entered his ears.
"I've been busy."
"Busy where?"
He then hears shatters of glass and yells as you sob while trying to talk to him.
He pictures your face, your crying, begging face, asking for some sort of salvation from his cold and merciless actions.
"T-There's someone else?"
"Someone better."
"H-How could y-you do this?"
"When I look at you now... I feel... nothing."
Childe opened his eyes, not realizing that tears had started to flow to his cheeks. "Mama..."
"Y-Yes, dear?"
"I hurt her..." He was in a state of disbelief. "I-I... Why...?"
His tears fell faster, looking at his mother for answers. "W-Why, Mama? Why was I so stupid? Why did I choose to lose her?"
"I don't know, dear, but that's simply what happened, and you could never make her forget that, even if you forgot."
His breathing started to accelerate, feeling like he wanted to punch himself. As his head started spinning, his vision turns black.
~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~
You took a deep breath as you walked into the house, feeling everyone's eyes on you as you entered.
"Honey..." Your ex mother-in-law embraces you once again, holding you tight. "I'm so sorry... I didn't want to make it difficult for you..."
"N-No, no..." You returned her hug, sniffling as you start to tear up. "I readied myself for this, I'm just here to drop off the final papers..."
"Could you talk to him?" Alevtina suddenly asked, looking at you hesitantly. "I know he's been a jerk... but he won't eat unless he talks to you."
You parted from their mother, feeling the pressure of their request.
"It's okay to curse him, or to scream, or rough him up, I'll even help you." Alexei placed his hand on your shoulder to comfort you.
You nodded, sighing as they guided you to his room. And as you entered with a heavy feeling in your chest, he immediately sat up, alerted by your presence. You stare at each other for a bit before you muttered a word.
"Hi." You greeted him shortly.
"Hey..." His voice was soft, and his eyes followed you attentively.
"I'm sorry to intrude, I'll make this quick." You breathe deeply, trying to relax yourself. "I finished the papers, split the assets, got the lawyers."
"I talked to her, y-your woman..." You looked down, fidgeting with your hands. Childe seemed unfazed by it, though his gaze seem to falter at the mention of 'his woman'.
"She... umm... wasn't really interested anymore after the accident..." You breathe heavily, feeling small under his gaze. "But... your family's here to take care of you..."
Clearing your throat, you continued. "I do have one request, if I could... I would like a safe boat ride back home." You stepped closer, intending to hand him the envelope that contained all the paperwork to finalize your divorce.
"Take it all." You stopped in your tracks as he spoke.
"The house, the mora, the boat. It's all yours..." He lays back on his bed, staring at the ceiling. "Would you also do me a favor?"
You looked at him, encouraging him to speak.
"Carve my heart out and take it with you."
"...Can we be serious for a second?" You sighed.
"I would like to stay with you. I think that would be a good way to do it without constantly wanting to punch myself." You noticed that his eyes started to flood with tears.
"Ajax... I'm sorry this happened to you..."
"No, Y/N, I'm sorry... I'm sorry for everything." He sat up again, tears falling from his eyes as he looks up at you with genuine eyes. "I don't know why I did that. And I... I regret it so much..." He reached for your hand, and you let him hold onto you for strength.
"Every tear I had in me I already cried when you left me for her." You smiled bitterly, though you remained soft, making him even more guilty as you try to stay strong. "But I appreciate the apology..."
You pull your hand away from him slowly, feeling that he was reluctant to let go.
"I-I still love you..."
You gave him a final smile. "You'll love someone better than me... Childe..." You back away, leaving him alone in his room still yearning for the days where his memory only consisted of loving you.
~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~
Hiiii again after quite a while! I think I've been noticing that my recent fics have been angst, I guess I just feel like hurting you guys this season of giving (I give pain :D)
Anywayy, anon, I think at some point I went my own direction and didn't fully stick to your request (I'm sorryyy TvT) but I hope you like it anyway!
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daydreaming-nerd · 5 months ago
Text
I’ll Crawl Home To Her (Azriel x Reader) 
AN: This was supposed to be based off But Daddy I Love Him but it morphed into something else but I'm kinda happy about it.
Summary: The story of how the princess of Velaris and the shadowsinger came to be.
Warnings: blood, injury, dickhead dads, bit of smut but it's not too descriptive (It's for the plot), angst, fluffy ending.
Word count: 8053
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As a princess I was told that “hate” is a very strong word. Consequently, there weren’t a lot of things that I hated. For example, I greatly disliked when my tea came with too much milk, and I absolutely despised corsets. But if there was one thing I hated, and I mean truly hated, it was my father. 
If it wasn’t for the way he treated my mother and older brother then it would be the way he treated me. How he kept me from my beloved, my brother's best friend, the shadowsinger, my Azriel.  
Azriel had been mine long before my father ever knew about it. When I grew to be 207 my mother finally convinced my father to let me go to Windhaven with her to visit Rhys. I hadn’t seen my brother in years, as he had begun training with the Illyrians. 
He wrote me letters of course, detailing friends and enemies he made along the way. Two of which stood out to me, Cassian and Azriel. However these letters never made up for him in the flesh, which is why during my first trip to Windhaven I had never been so excited. To this day I still remember it…
The winter wind stung my cheeks as snow clung to the furs of my cloak. It was as if no matter how many layers I wore the wind found its way to barrel through and nip at my skin. 
I found myself walking along the edge of the camp, where the light of the fires couldn't reach me and only the moon gave me the ability to see. When my mother and I arrived at the little cabin Rhys was not there, after speaking to Devlon we found he was on assignment and would be home soon. 
After a few hours in the cabin I began to feel claustrophobic, so I took a walk around the heavily wooded area. There was something magic about the first snow of the season. The way the snow covered the ground and crunched under my boots. White capped trees that looked like they were frosted by the gods, and the still silence that came from the insulation the blanket of white provided.  
“It’s a little cold out don’t you-” a voice crooned behind me and stopped abruptly as I turned to face him. 
Standing frozen just a few feet from me was an Illyrian male with his mouth agape at the sight of me. He was large, his wings the biggest I had ever seen. Inky black hair framed his carved face as his hazel eyes frozen in shock as if he had just seen a ghost. 
“Forgive me,” he said, shaking his head a bit, as if to clear the fog from his mind. “It’s just that I don’t see many beautiful things up here, you startled me.” 
My cheeks flush and I pray he thinks it's from the cold and not the butterflies in my stomach. 
“I find that hard to believe when this is your view,” I smile, gesturing to the snow valley below us. “There’s nothing more beautiful than the first snowfall of the year.”
Footsteps crunch behind me as he comes up on my right, “Perhaps, but it pales in comparison to you,” he smirks and this time I know he can tell he’s the reason my cheeks are pink. “Might I have the honor of knowing your name?” 
I turn to meet his gaze once more but before I can answer back I hear a shout coming from far away. 
“Y/N!” my brother shouts charging towards me. 
“Rhys!” I call back running into his embrace. 
He lets out a groan as I leap into his arms, a pile of furs and wool as I pull him into me. The scent of sea salt and citrus filling my nose, the warmth of him seeping through my clothes. 
“Ahh little sister I’ve missed you,” Rhys says, setting me down to get a good look at me. 
“Little sister?” called the male behind me, his snow crunching footsteps coming towards Rhysand and I’s side. 
“It seems you’ve already met her, this is my little sister,  y/n.”Rhys beams, placing a hand on my shoulder. “Y/n this is my very good friend, Azriel.” 
“Azriel,” I blink, holding out my hand for the shadowsinger to shake. How had I not realized? Rhysand’s letters spoke of his shadowsinger friend, now that I looked at him, and I mean really looked at him, I could see the dark matter swirling around him. 
“Princess,” he says, bowing his head and pressing a kiss to my hand. “It is an honor to meet you. You’ll have to forgive my previous informality, I didn’t know who you were.” 
Rhysand let out a hearty laugh behind me, “Azriel my friend there is no need for such formalities, in fact my sister detests them.” he smiles. 
“It’s true, you can just call me y/n, I’m sure that we’ll be seeing a lot more of each other in the years to come.” I smile hoping I was speaking the truth into existence. 
“Come, mother has made dinner for all of us and you have yet to meet Cassian,” Rhys said enthusiastically, throwing an arm over my shoulder. 
From that day forward I found myself spending more and more time at Windhaven, in hopes of seeing Azriel. Sometimes I would see him for only a minute or so, other times he would be able to stay and have dinner with my mother, myself and of course Rhys and Cass. 
Those were always my favorite nights when he and I would share stolen glances across the table. Sometimes we might brush hands reaching for the carafe of wine, other times I would feel his boot brush my ankle under the table. Both of us danced around the other like flickering flames. 
It wasn’t until a few years later when all three of them conquered the blood rite that Azriel and I were finally able to admit our feelings for one another…
We stood behind one of the many rows of cabins, the sound of laughing warriors celebrating their victories or mourning their losses ran through the camp. Before he even spoke I knew why he asked me to meet him back here, I could feel the tension between us both. 
“I’m tired of acting like I don’t care about you. I’m tired of saying “nothing” whenever Rhys and Cassian ask me what’s on my mind. I’m tired of trying to hide that everytime I come back to camp that I’m looking for you and hoping I can see you for just one second. I’m tired of pretending I don’t love you,” Azriel confesses, caging me against the back wall of a cabin. 
“Azriel I-” I begin but he cuts me off.
“When we were on the mountain, there was a moment where there was a dagger to my throat and I thought I was going to die. I thought I would leave this world without telling you how much I loved you. If it wasn’t for Cassian that would’ve been the case. I won’t make the same mistakes twice,” he finished. 
“Azriel, I love you too,” I shuddered a sigh, aware of how close he was to me. 
The second the words left my mouth he was on me, large hands encircling my waist as I felt every inch of his body pressed against mine. His breath was hot on my face, contrasting the bitter cold of the night air.  
“Can I kiss you?” he breathed,  lips mere inches from mine. 
“Please,” I begged, but once again the word hung in the air for mere seconds before his mouth was on mine. 
Every part of it felt so right. His hands on my waist, my fingers in his hair, his lips on mine claiming me in a way that made my head spin. My arms pulled him as close as possible, needing to feel him, smell that scent of rain, leather and whatever intoxicating cologne he was wearing.  I was so drunk on him that I was shaken when I heard a hearty laugh ring out through the camp. 
I pulled back immediately realizing what was happening, “Oh my gods, we can’t do this here, my brother he-” 
“Shhh, shhh,” he cooed, brushing a stray hair behind my ear. “I talked to Rhys about it, I have his blessing to court you. He took it rather well, he actually seemed excited.” Azriel laughed, pressing a kiss to my forehead as he held me closer, his body blocking the wind from seeping into my clothes. 
“Oh Azriel,” I smile, kissing him hard as I feel him lifting me into the air, my head spinning just as fast as he spun me. 
We spent the rest of that night lying on a blanket in a field away from the world. The sound of distant celebrations making us laugh every now and then. At some point I could’ve sworn I heard Cassian singing a tale of an old drunk warrior.
I had tried to tell Azriel that he should join his brothers in their celebration but he insisted that he would much rather spend his few moments of peace with me. It was one of the best nights of my life. 
Our relationship was kept secret from everyone but Rhys and Cassian. Even my mother, who always accompanied me to Windhaven, was kept in the dark. No one with close ties to my father could know. That being said, it was hard for Azriel and I to find quiet moments together. 
Most of the time we met in the woods behind camp. Azriel would go away and bring me little trinkets, pretty rocks and feathers he found while in the mountains. In the spring he always came with a freshly picked bouquet of wildflowers. We always ended up making out and getting carried away, on more than one occasion I tried to take things further but he never let me. 
“I won’t have the first time I bed you in the woods. You’re a princess, you deserve a soft bed to be worshiped on.” 
Was what he always said to me. While I appreciated the sentiment, I couldn’t help but wish for more. 
It wasn’t until a few months later that I finally saw an opening. Father and mother were going to be at a meeting in the Winter Court, leaving Velaris in the care of Rhys. More importantly the cabin at Windhaven would be empty. That night was truly the best night of my life.
My back hits the warm sheets below me as Azriel looks at my bare body with hungry eyes. I had never been with a male before, my father and mother dead set on having me intact for whatever husband they shackled me to. But Azriel would be my husband, even if he wasn’t noble or the son of a High Lord he was mine, and I was his. I didn’t care how many rules I had to break to have him. 
“My beautiful, beautiful princess,” he murmurs, pressing kisses to my neck. 
His hands wander the expanse of my bare skin, both warming and leaving goosebumps wherever they trail. I arch my back into him, needing more, needing the very essence of him branded into me. 
“Azriel I need more,” I breathe tugging on the ends of his hair. 
He had already stripped me bare and kissed every square inch of me before falling to his knees and feasting on me like I was his last meal. I had read about such sinful touches before, dreamt about experiencing those sensations with him at night. None of it compared to the real thing. 
“Are you sure about this?” He asks me once more, brushing the hair from my face. 
“I’m sure, I want it to be you,” I nod running my hands through his hair again. 
The wild twinkle in his eyes was enough to make my toes curl as he smiled at me, “I promise to be gentle, to make you feel good,” he whispers, pressing a kiss to my lips. 
“I trust you Az,” I nod and his lips kick up again at his nickname. 
I feel him nudge and my entrance and my breath hitches as he inches himself inside. The stretch was painful, but the sting faded as he peppered kisses all over my face, whispering sweet nothings to me.
“Shh you’re doing so well princess…”
“You’re so beautiful…” 
“Can you feel me? Can you feel us?” 
“I love you…” 
I must’ve seen stars a million times that night. His gentle nature only made me fall deeper in love with him. It wasn’t the brutal fucking I had heard about in taverns and from drunk men at balls. He had taken his time, and been even more gentle than he had promised me. 
We made love a dozen times that night. Kissed and touched and worshiped until I fell asleep, bathed and warm in his arms.
The next morning was hard to face. Knowing we had to leave the cabin and act as if we didn’t spend the entire night exchanging souls, and tangled in eachothers arms. 
Az especially was on edge, so much so that when a younger male offered to tie my boot for me Azriel marched over and pushed him into the mud before pulling my foot onto his bent knee and tying it himself. 
Of course I yelled at him for being an Illyrian baby while Rhys and Cassian laughed and poked fun at their friend. Azriel just huffed and shot a warning glance at the poor male who had tried to tie my boot. 
From there on out we spent every possible moment together. I would tell my father that I was visiting friends in other courts just so I could see Azriel, which wasn’t often. As the war between humans and fae grew more iminanent I saw less and less of the shadowsinger. Our meetings became more fervent, and well…passionate. We became careless and it’s what ended up tearing him away from me for good.  
My back was pressed against the cabin wall, my hands pinned by my head as Azriel’s lips consumed mine. We had no longer than an hour together before he would be set back to scout for Hybern’s troops, but we intended to make the most of it. 
“I missed you,” he breathed into my neck. 
“I missed you too, two weeks is too long,” I murmured, breathing in his scent. He always left me one of his many shirts to sleep in but it never did compare to the real thing. 
“I don’t have much time, they’re sending me to the border to scout for Hybern’s troops,” he says in between kisses. 
Scarred hands drift over my waist and graze my bum as I feel him collecting fist fulls of my skirt. Before my dress can be pushed up much further than my knees the door to the cabin barges open, startling both of us. Azriel  placed his hand on one of the daggers strapped to his side, but not even he could defend me from who stepped through the threshold. 
“What the hells is going on here?” My father’s voice boomed from the doorway, the cold air from outside seeping into the place that was once our own. 
I peek out from behind Azriel’s shoulder to find not only my father but Lord Devlon standing before us. My fathers eyes locked on mine, and white hot fear seared my nerves. 
“What are you doing with my daughter?!” My father roared, his power slamming Azriel aside. 
“Father no!” I scream, clinging to his arm to interrupt his antics. 
Devlon screamed for backup to come as Azriel’s feet hit the floor again. The commotion outside beginning to stir. 
“My lord, I-” Azriel starts to explain but my father cuts him off. 
“You will not speak unless spoken to, you bastard born brute!” my father screams as Devlon’s men come to detain the Shadowsinger. 
“Father stop it! He didn’t take advantage of me, we’ve been seeing each other.” I plead with my father as tears start to well up in my eyes. 
“What?!” he scoffed, looking at me like I was a common whore. “You are promised to one of the sons of Spring and yet you soil yourself with filth of his kind?” 
“He’s not filth. He’s Rhys’ friend, and he’s good, brave and kind.” I beseech him as I hear Azriel struggle against the men who have him bound.
My father takes a deep breath and turns his gaze from me. The sound of his boots crossing the wooden floors to stand before Azriel are the loudest most impending sound I had ever heard. He stands before my shadowsinger before raising his hand and letting his fist collide with that beautiful face I had spent so long kissing. 
My gasp reverberates through the room but Azriel doesn’t make a sound, as if he’s challenging my father, or proving his worth. 
“What should we do with him?” my father asks, not taking his eyes off Az. 
“The boy has completed the rite, we can send him to one of the battalions on the border. Perhaps the trash will take itself out,” Devlon laughs. I had known that the Lord had a chip on his shoulder for my brother and his friends. But sending him to the slaughter? 
“Father please I love him!” I cry falling to my knees before my father, grasping his hand. I would never beg my father for anything, never fall to my knees for anyone. But for this I would… for Azriel, I would die on my knees. 
Despite my pleading my fathers gaze never falters from where it is fixed on Azriel. As if he’s trying to decide if he should slit his throat now or let him die on a battlefield. Azriel’s face remains steadfast and strong, showing no signs of weakness, like he will accept whatever punishment befalls him with the grace of a warrior.
“Send him,” he says resolutely before turning away. 
“NO PLEASE!” I beseech as my father hauls me to my feets again, but my knees are giving out under me. 
“It is done,” his gruff voice says in my ear as I watch them haul Azriel to his feet. “One day you’ll thank me.” 
I watch as they pull Azriel toward the door. Dragging him unnecessarily letting his wings drape across the ground. It was all happening so fast and could be the last time I ever saw his face.
“Let me say goodbye! Please let me say goodbye!” I shouted thrashing in my fathers grasp. Needing to touch Az one last time, needing one more moment with him. 
Azriel’s eyes were frantic as he heard my screams, as he watched my father use his strength to detain me.  
“Listen! Listen!” he called trying to get me to stop my frantic blubbering, the guards pulling him out the door. “You have to be strong princess. I love you , and I will find you again, if not in this life than in the next!” he shouts as he is hauled past the threshold of the cabin. 
“Azriel!” I scream, my voice cracking under the weight of my tears. 
“I love you!” he shouts again from the outside of the cabin. 
“I love you!” I call back to him, not knowing if I’ll ever get another chance to say it. 
That was six months ago...
Since then the war had gotten more and more bloody, and unavoidable. As far as I knew Azriel was still alive. I hadn’t seen him since the night he was ripped from my arms, a night I often had nightmares about. I sent him letters whenever possible and every so often I would get one back. 
I could tell he had tried to send more, as every date on the ones that did make it through were skewed. The most recent one, dated two months ago, burned a hole in the pocket of my dress. The folds were so worn from reading  that I feared they may fall apart the next time I opened it. 
My love, 
I am alive and well, though my battalion has suffered great losses. More and more Illyrians are sent to the frontlines every day to take the place of the dead. There are times I wonder if a wide eyed recruit will ever take my place…
At night I lie in bed and dream of you lying next to me, your warmth. Or the way your hair looks sprawled in swirling over the green grass when you’re under me. The sound of your voice calling my attention. The softness of your hands. The night you came undone for me in the cabin.
 My only consolation is that when I look up at the night sky. I know you are looking at those same stars. And if what I’m doing is keeping you safe. Keeping you fed and swathed in those blue silks that drive me crazy. Then I will sleep in this tent and fight alongside my peers happily. My love is safe and warm because of me. 
I love you, and I will return to you. 
Yours eternally, 
Azriel
I fold the tattered parchment with gloved hands and tuck it securely into the pocket of my dress. The shouts of men and the clash of swords outside my tent drown out the peace I had struggled to preserve. 
Hybern’s army had marched on Velaris and while the border hadn’t been breached, my father decided it was unsafe to leave my mother and I there. My mother was sent to a camp with my father where he would watch over her, I was sent to Rhys’ camp.
 The flap of the tent is thrown open, my brother charges in wearing his leathers, his hair disheveled and a letter in hand. 
“What is it?” I stand upon seeing the worry gracing his face.    
Armies had been marching upon another camp a few miles away. If they had breached the encampment that would mean they were coming for us next. We would have just minutes to evacuate and find a safe place. 
“The men were able to hold the front lines,” he says, setting down his swords with a sigh that told me that there was still news to be revealed. 
“Then what is it?” I asked quietly, unsure of whether or not I wanted to know the truth he had to say. 
Violet eyes met my own, in them, a sorrow and worry I had not yet seen from my brother, “It’s Azriel.” he said. 
My heart stopped and my world quieted as I perched myself on a nearby chair, not trusting my legs to keep me upright. Not when my heart lay in the balance, the very reason I was alive.
“He was injured, severely. He may be dying y/n.” he said sadly, coming to stand before me. 
May be dying. Which meant he was alive, which meant there was still a chance. 
My head snaps up to him, a new fire in my gaze that no one had seen in six months. 
“Take me to him,” I ordered my brother as I stood to collect my cloak. 
“You’re asking me to take you, my sister, to the front lines. I won’t do it.” Rhys shakes his head. 
“I am going with or without you Rhys,” I say firmly, wrapping my cloak around my shoulders. 
He sighs and runs a hand through his hair before picking his swords up again and strapping them to his sides. With my hood over my head and my brother's hand at my back we made our way out into the night. Once we reached the wards at the edge of the camp we winnowed to the encampment near the frontlines.  
Immediately as we walked through the rows of tents and campfires I could tell that these males had seen hell. All of them looked significantly worse than the males at the camp we had just come from. Most of them were caked in mud and blood, some were drunk on whatever filled their cups. All of them were loud and rowdy and most likely celebrating their last nights in this life.  
Rhys led me through the camp, until we arrived at a lonely tent in the center. It was large and from the outside I could practically smell Azriel. I bolted for the entrance and threw open the flaps, my heart racing, unsure if I would find him alive or dead. 
But there he was, breathing. Leaning against the back of his bed with a large bandage over his left thigh. He was awake and refreshingly himself, as if nothing was truly wrong and most importantly he was alive. 
I run to him throwing my arms around his neck, “Oh Azriel,” I coo breathing him in. 
“Y/n?” he says, his mind clearly still foggy. 
I pull back to cup his face, whoever had healed him has cleaned him up, the small cut above his eyebrow already starting to heal, “Az,” I breathe. 
His hand comes to cup my face, “How are you here? This can’t be real,” his eyes search my face as if to try and wake up from a dream. 
I place a kiss on his lips, “I’m real, I’m here,” I assure him as tears spill from my eyes. “They told me you were dying.” 
“I am well, it was a deep cut but the healers say I’ll be okay,” he assures me as his eyes continue to take me in. 
I let my eyes do the same, taking in every cut and bruise on him, even the patched holes in his wings no doubt from arrows piercing the beautiful, leathery flesh. 
“Faebane?” Rhys’ voice croons from the entrance of the tent as he watches us, it seemed that his nerves were also settled upon seeing Azriel well. 
“Yep,” Azriel said nonchalantly, but his eyes told the truth of how happy he was to see my brother, or maybe how relieved. 
“Hurts like a bitch doesn’t it?” Rhys chuckles stepping into the tent and closing the flap. 
My eyes widened at his causal tone, “How can you both be so docile about this? He could’ve died.” I exclaim, looking Azriel over once more in case I missed any lingering wounds. 
Azriel's chest rumbles with a chuckle, “Shhh my love. Everything will be alright.” he says, pressing a kiss to my forehead. “But what are you doing here? It isn’t safe.”
“The border of Velaris is almost breached,” Rhys started from behind me. “We couldn’t leave her and my mother there, it wasn’t safe.” 
“Mother is with father and I’m with Rhys. We found out you were injured and just a camp away and I asked him to take me to you.” I continue Rhys’ explanation. 
Azriel cuts Rhys a somewhat harsh look as if to say ‘why the hell would you take her somewhere so dangerous?’
“You needed to see each other,” Rhys explains further. “If anything were to happen to you and I didn’t let you two say goodbye, I would never forgive myself.”
Azriel’s shoulders softened in understanding before turning to me once more, “You have to go princess,” he said, eyes full of sorrow.
My breath hitches as I stumble back a little from where I sit next to him, “What? No, I won’t leave you,” I say resolutely.
He cups the side of my face, “Please it’s not safe here,” he eyes pleading as his voice falters. 
I go to argue but Rhys speaks up behind me, “He’s right y/n, It’s the most vulnerable camp we have.” my brother says, his words solemn. 
“I don’t care!” I exclaim turning back to brush Azriel’s hair from his face. “I’m not leaving him Rhys, we will be okay.”
Azriel’s eyes flare, “Look at me!” he shouts gesturing to his leg. “I can’t protect you here,” his voice is laced with frustration, not at my unwillingness to leave, but his inability to do the one thing he swore to always do, protect me. 
“Then I’ll die here with you!” I proclaim, fiercely. “If you cannot protect me, then you cannot protect yourself. Please Azriel, please don’t make me leave.” I cry lying down on his chest, gripping the leathers there, as if it might keep my brother from ripping me away.
“I can’t,” I sob as my words get caught in my throat. “I can’t lose you again I-” 
“Shhh,” Azriel coos, his hand stroking my hair as he pulls me into his chest. “You’ll stay here in my arms.” he assures me and I’m finally able to relax into his touch.  
“Y/n, I can’t stay here. I need to go back to my own troops and prepare them for tomorrow,” my brother said softly, not trying to persuade me to return, but to inform me of the increasing danger.
“I understand,” I say standing to say goodbye.
“I’ll come back for you tomorrow morning, before the troops march,” he said, his words tinged with sorrow. 
I take in the sight of my brother looking defeated, a look I so rarely saw on him. It broke me to realize I might never see him after this. If the enemy marched on this camp there would be no one to keep Azriel and I from the slaughter given his injury. 
“Okay,” I whispered, my voice cracking as I threw myself onto my beloved brother. 
Rhys said his goodbyes to Azriel, both of them not wanting to get too deep, say too much, for fear of manifesting defeat on both sides. When my brother exited the tent I took my spot next to Azriel on his large cot and waited for either death or the sunrise.  
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Later in the night, the raucous from outside got louder and louder disturbing my sleep. When I raised my head from Azriel’s chest I found that his eyes remained open and fixed on the tent entrance, like he was ready to challenge anyone who dared to walk through despite his inability to walk. 
“Hey,” I smiled weakly, my voice shaky from sleep. 
“Hey,” he smiled back, pushing a hair from my face. 
I moved back the blanket to check the gash in his thigh. Lifting the white bandage, I could see that it was almost completely soaked through, if I left it that way he would never get better.
I throw my legs over the edge of the cot and search for my discarded cloak, “You need fresh bandages or you’ll get an infection. I’m going to go get you some.” 
“Y/n  don’t you dare leave this tent. There are war bound men out there looking for one last lay before they leave this world,” he pleads, reaching for my hand that’s just out of reach. 
“I’ll only be a moment Az,” I assure him before raising my hood and slipping out of the tent. 
I can hear him shouting my name as I exit, but his protests are quickly drowned out by the sound of drunken men. Azriel was right, these men were drunk and not in their right mind. But if that wound got infected and he died I would never forgive myself. So I kept my head down walking towards the medic tent I passed on my way in, ignoring rambunctious cheers and stumbling men. 
The light of the medic tent comes into view and relief washes over me swiftly before the rug is pulled out from under me and I run smack into a broad chest.
“Well what do we have here?” laughs a drunken male. I can smell the sweat and alcohol on him. 
“Looks like we have a little birdy who lost her way,” laughs a male from my right.
My feet take two steps back before bumping into another mountain of a male. His hand comes up to rip the hood off my head, if all three of them recognized me as their princess they didn’t show it. My pulse began to race as I frantically looked for a way out of this hell. 
“What’s a beauty like you doing out here?” crooned the male behind me.
I put on a stoic face, “I’m leaving if you’ll excuse me,” I state, but before I can even take my first step I feel large hands grasping my shoulders holding me in place.
“Whoever bought you for the night must’ve paid a pretty penny,” jested the man to my right. 
“What do ya say darlin? Are you gonna give these brave men a proper send off?” the man behind me says low into my ear as he grabs me around the middle, plucking me off the ground.
I start kicking trying to break free, my screamed muffled by his hand over my mouth. All the trashing in the world wasn’t enough to break their hold as the other two males descended upon me, as if they were willing to take me right there in the middle of camp. 
“I’ll thank you to take your hands off my princess,” drawled a voice from behind me. 
The eyes of the three men surrounding me went wide at whatever figure stood behind us, all three of them scurrying off to gods knew where. I turn slowly to face whoever my rescuer was, and I’m met with a mountain of sheer muscle and bright red siphons. 
“Cassian!” I cried running to throw my arms around the burly warrior, I hadn’t seen him in over a year. 
He hugs me tighter, the kind of bear hug only he could provide. It was clear to me that he missed me just as much as I had missed him. When he releases me he bends down to cup my face, and wipe away the tears I didn’t know had fallen. 
“Princess, what are you doing here? Where is your brother?” he asked, brows furrowed.
“Rhys brought me here but he’s gone now, he’s gone back to his own camp but he’ll be back tomorrow,” I say as Cassian continues to wipe away the fresh tears, this time tears of happiness and not fear.
Cassain stands up as if to assess for danger before tossing an arm around me, “Stay with me, I’ll keep you safe. Where is Azriel? I was told he was injured,” he asks, remaining vigilant.  
“He’s okay, I was just getting him fresh bandages,” I report, pointing Cassian towards the medic tent. 
“He let you leave his tent?!” he balks corralling me inside the tent. 
“Uh, no. Not really,” I laugh nervously. 
He rolls his eyes and grabs a few armfuls of bandages before shoving them into my arms. We weave through drunken men who do a good job of staying at least three feet away from me, no doubt seeing The Lord of Bloodshed trailing me. 
I throw open the flap of Azriel’s tent, running to his side at once. 
“Oh thank the mother,” he sighs in relief upon seeing me. 
I laugh at his fussing and begin dressing his wound, “Look who I found,” I say nodding my head to where Cassian stands behind me.
“I believe I found you,” Cassian corrects me, sheer amusement in his voice. 
“Cass!” Azriel beams as his brother gives him an affectionate smack on the shoulder. 
“Brother you look a little worse for wear,” Cassian chuckles looking at the wound I was currently cleaning.
“I’ve been better,” Azriel winces as I wrap the wound in a clean bandage.
“I heard what happened and came as soon as I could. Ran right into your princess here, causing trouble as usual,” the warrior chortles beside me making me roll my eyes. 
“What?” Azriel asked, more alert than he previously was. 
“You were right, the men out there are assholes,” I scoff, tying off the fresh bandage. 
“Did they touch you?” he inquired, his eyes ablaze. 
“Az it’s fine Cass was there,” I assure him placing a hand on his shoulder feeling the palpable tension there, like he was ready to pounce.
“Y/n did they put their hands on you?” he asks again, this time more unyielding than before. 
“Yes but look at me, I'm fine!” I say with an exasperated sigh. 
Azriel’s eyes flit to Cassian as he extends his hand to his brother, like he needs support. 
“Cassian help me up,” he orders, already scooting to the edge of the cot.
“Azriel don’t you dare!” I shout smacking his chest. “Enough with the territorial, Illyrian nonsense! You’re injured, you’re going to get yourself killed!” 
The shadowsingers body slumps back into bed in defeat with a huff, clearly upset he couldn’t pummel the shit out of a couple of lowly males who weren’t worth it in the first place. 
Cassian’s chuckle reverberated through the tent, “Good to see you two picking up right where you left off,” he joked, remembering all the times we had similar quarrels. 
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It was the early hours of morning, and while the sun was still hiding behind the mountains, it would be rearing its ugly head soon enough. The partying and cheering from outside the tent had died down. Men either passing out drunk or choosing sleep over thoughts of what might happen tomorrow.
Cassian snored softly in the corner of the tent in the chair he took up. He had elected to stay behind and watch over us at Azriel’s request and I was smart enough to not argue with two Illyrians. 
I layed on Azriel’s chest, waiting for sleep to claim me but it never came. Sleep didn’t find Azriel as well, his hand twirling through the strands of my unbound hair as we sat in silence. 
“You know what kept me alive out there on that battlefield after I was injured?” Azriel whispered into the night. 
“A healer that I’ll be paying a very handsome bonus to?” I laugh squeezing my arms around him a bit.
“No, you” he said seriously rubbing my shoulder 
“Me?” I gawk, sitting up so I could look him in the eye. 
“Yes, you,” he smiled, pressing a kiss to my forehead.  “When I was downed they thought I was dead. Horses and men clamored over me. It was all so loud, such a blur but then I closed my eyes and there you were.” he said looking at the canopy of the tent, as if remembering the event.
“It was a memory from the first time I saw you, before I even knew who you were. You were standing in the snow waiting for Rhys and your mother and there was snow all over your hair. It was the first snow of the year and you were entranced just like you always are.” He chuckles, pulling me closer. “But I knew then and there that I had to open my eyes. Had to get up. Even if it was just to see your face one more time, kiss your lips, tell you I love you. I woke up in this tent reeling from it. I could’ve sworn you were here, in the vision I felt your touch. And then hours later you storm in here with your fussing and worrying.” he says. 
I feel a tear roll down my face as I cup his face, pulling his gaze from the canopy to me. I pulled his letter out of my dress pocket, the paper flopping about from how many times it had been folded and unfolded. 
“I kept this letter with me every single day. I must’ve read it a hundred times, hells I might even have it memorized.” I laugh, shaking the paper in my hands. “I never once gave up hope that I would see you again. No matter what happens after tonight I still won’t give up hope. I know I’ll find you again.”
Azriel chuckles, pressing his forehead to mine, “I’d crawl home to you if I had to princess,” he says resolutely. 
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I wake the next morning to the sound of men moving about outside the tent and an empty cot. The covers before me are still disheveled from where Azriel slipped out from under me. I threw the blankets off the bed and pulled my cloak from where I set it last night, fastening it to my shoulders. 
When I toss open the flaps of the tent I’m momentarily blinded by the bright sun before the sight of men collecting their weapons and armor come into focus. My eyes darted frantically for a trace of Azriel, surely he couldn’t have gone far, surely he wasn’t going to fight today. 
“Azriel!” I call out roaming around looking for a flash of a blue siphon. 
Heavy footsteps come up behind me grabbing my arm and I turn around to be met with Cassian. I looked back to the tent and realized he had been keeping watch outside. 
“Cass, where is he?” I ask him, but all I’m met with is a heavy gaze from Cassian. 
“Y/n?” calls a voice from behind me and I turn to see my father, mother and brother walking towards us.  
My mother runs over to me taking me into her arms and holding me close. It was clear to me that they had found Rhys and instantly questioned why I wasn’t under his care. 
“Thank the gods,” my mother breathed taking in my unharmed appearance. 
“You smell like that Illyrian brute,” my father sneered and I knew right away he ment Azriel. 
“He could have been dying,” I reply with equal venom, my gaze narrowing at the man who went through such great lengths to keep us apart. 
“Of course, why do you think I sent him to the frontlines again today?” he scoffed, already turning his attention to the hordes of men preparing for battle. 
My blood turned to ice in my veins and my heart plummeted. 
“What?” I cried looking at Rhys who wore a solemn look on his face. “Rhys, you knew?” 
My brother lets out a shaky breath, “I knew before we even arrived last night. When he tried to get you to leave I used daemati to tell him he was being sent to the front lines. He knew it would be the last time he ever saw you.” he confessed.
He knew. 
Haste clouds my mind and I turn to run in the same direction with the rest of the men, my father and brother joining their ranks without another word. My mother catches me around the shoulders and pulls me into her embrace as my knees hit the muddy ground beneath us. 
“No, no, no, no no!” I scream trying to run to the front, as if I could keep Azriel from death myself. 
“The battle is not yet over sweetheart, he may still live,” My mother coos stroking my hair. 
“He was injured mother,” my words come out as sobs as I cling to her cloak. 
“Have faith,” she pleads, kneeling on the ground with me, trying to calm me as best she can. 
“Azriel,” I cry. “My Azriel.” 
I give into my mothers embrace and after a while she ushers me toward a tent. She wipes my face with a cool towel trying to calm my swollen eyes, but it’s no use. Every war cry, and ear rupturing blast feels like the one that takes Azriel’s life. Each one sends me back into a mess of shallow breaths and tears. 
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Only when the battle cries fade, and the blasts of siphons and raw power cease do my tears stop. Soldiers and Illyrains come filtering back to the camp, some whole, some being carried by their peers. My brother and Cassain are the first to find us. Rhys was unharmed, but Cassian was wheeled to a healer immediately. Thankfully, she claimed he would be alright.
I took to the masses, weaving through men making their way back occasionally running into some as my eyes were focused on the skies. Searching amongst the hordes of Illyrians flying in. If Azriel was anywhere it would be there. 
“Azriel!” I shouted, my voice going hoarse from the screaming I had been doing. 
More and more Illyrians fly overhead, not one of them resembling my Azriel. If he was amongst them he would see me standing out like a sore thumb amongst the rabble, going against the grain of everyone before me.   
“AZRIEL!” I call out even louder, cupping my hands around my mouth as if it will help. 
“Y/N!” 
I hear my voice being called, not from the skies, but from the ground. My eyes snap to the crowds before me before I see a pair of wings over the top of a million heads. 
“AZRIEL?!” I call out moving in the direction of the voice that called to me. 
Then I see him, my Azriel. The wound on his leg is split open and his wings are pierced with a dozen arrows which explains his inability to fly. But he’s there, and he’s whole, and alive.
“Y/n!” he calls out to me again. 
I pick up the skirts of my dress running to him, my shoulders bumping into all the men I weave around. I jump into his arms feeling him pick me up, pulling me impossibly close. 
“Oh Az,” I breathe running a hand through his hair as my feet hit the ground again, his eyes assessing me for any injury. “My love, I thought I would never see you again,” I cried. 
His thumbs wipe away my tears as he cups my face, “Death, nor a thousand evil men could keep me from you,” he smiled before pulling me into his chest. 
As we hold each other, the chaos around us fades into the background. For a moment, time stands still, and all that matters is that we are together. He was here, in my arms and he was alive. Both of us were, and there were many more years ahead of us. Many, many more years. 
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Epilogue: third person pov
Rhysand and Feyre stood in the living room of the townhouse. The world outside was near silent as Velaris slept, having spent the day celebrating solstice. Even the faelights in the home seemed to have dimmed. Members of the Inner Circle worked to clean the dessert plates off the table where they had their magnificent feast.
“And that’s their story,” Rhys finished saying to his mate, rubbing her shoulder as they continued to admire the scene before them.
On the large couch before them y/n was asleep on top of an even sleepier Azriel, his arms, legs and wings all but draping off the edges just to keep her comfortable. 
When Feyre stumbled into the adorable scene it had occurred to her that she had never heard the story of how the two came to be. Rhysand was more than happy to tell her the tale of forbidden love and near death experiences. 
“They’ve been through so much,” Feyre said, leaning into Rhysand’s touch. 
“They truly have,” Rhys nods, pressing a kiss to his mate's temple. “But now they get to eat too much turkey every solstice and skip out on dish duty so I think it worked out okay.” he chuckles. 
Feyre slaps him on the chest playfully but laughs right along with them watching as the pair lounges on the couch, mouths open and completely and utterly relaxed. The High Lord and Lady turn from the living room to rejoin the rest of their family in the kitchen. There would be time to make fun of the princess and the shadowsinger tomorrow. 
They had all the time in the world.
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nwjws · 1 year ago
Text
in my head - yjw
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; pairing - jungwon x fem!reader
; synopsis - you’ve hated jungwon ever since you two met on the train to hogwarts back in first year; he’s self-centered, lazy, and always coming out for you. now in your seventh year, you’ve been named head girl (woohoo!). unfortunately, the head boy position was given to the one and only yang jungwon (boohoo…). with no other choice, you’re forced to face the annoyingly attractive boy and work with him for the rest of the year - if you can even last that long.
; tags - fluff, angst, crack, ravenclaw! headboy!jungwon, slytherin! headgirl!reader, rivals to lovers, enemies to lovers, hogwarts au (with a modern twist), bc they have tablets and stuff
; warnings - a little bit of swearing, a lot of hostility between yn and jw, lmk if i missed anything!
; wc - 12.9k words (umm.... have fun!)
teaser
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everyone’s eyes are on you as you stand up at the front of the great hall while the headmaster - professor bang si hyuk - introduces you as this year’s head girl. looking at all the students staring back up at you, you almost feel proud of yourself (keyword: almost). 
you’d think someone would be overjoyed at being acknowledged and recognised enough to have been given such a high position, but you aren’t. 
instead, you’re silently fuming, just barely keeping your temper in check as you plaster a fake smile on your face. your eye twitches as you hear a low chuckle from-
“the head boy, yang jungwon!” the headmaster announces. cheers erupt from around the room, all clapping for their new heads. 
“i can feel the waves of anger practically radiating off of you,” he murmured quietly.
yang jungwon. 
the boy you despised so much. 
listen, you don’t really hate anyone, but you’re pretty sure that what you feel towards the boy you called ‘yang’ is close enough.
in all your six years at hogwarts, you two have constantly been at each other’s throats. arguments often broke out between you in corridors; fights wherein one would end up stupefied or thrown against the wall; even little sabotages against each other that were subtle enough that teachers could pass off as an accident or your own fault rather than the other’s. 
for example, back in third year, yang had tripped you on your way into the great hall after everyone got off the hogwarts express. you had flashed everyone behind you and scraped your knee when you landed on the ground.
although no one saw him do it, you immediately knew who the culprit was, especially when he smirked down at you over his shoulder as he walked ahead. oh how badly you wanted to slap that smile off his face in the moment.
you retaliated the next week by mixing his white laundry with red clothes, so he was forced to attend his classes with pink uniform until he got new shirts. nothing satisfied you more than the glares he sent your way throughout the first day of his pink week, you could feel him boring holes into the back of your head even when you weren’t looking.
making your way back to the slytherin table, you thought back to when you got that fateful letter a few weeks back.
you slid the window open after spotting an owl from afar flying towards your house.
the bird flew in gracefully, and dropped your letter from hogwarts on the kitchen island counter, accepting the treats offered from your hand.
“y/n, please. close the window, would you? it’s so windy outside - it’s blowing away my papers!” your mother scolded from her seat at the table.
“sorry, my bad! i just got my grades.”
“ah really? let’s see it then.”
you scanned the letter, satisfied to see an O on all your subjects. although they weren’t your final NEWTS grades, they were an indication of how you did throughout sixth year according to teachers’ assessments. 
you’d been nervous at seeing anything below an O, but your friends had told you not to worry all summer.
“you’ve never dropped from the top rank in our year ever since first year, why would you now?”
“hiyyih, it’s only because of how much i’ve studied, but what if the expectations this year are higher? what if it’s not enough? what if i spent too many free periods sitting with you guys by the lake instead of-“
“be for real, you only did that twice! you’re the only person who’s actually spent their free periods studying,” rei said.
“well that’s what they’re supposed to be used for!”
“who actually does that! besides you, of course.”
“rei’s right, even yang jungwon often spends his frees with his friends.”
“that’s why he’s number 2,” you roll your eyes. “maybe if he studied during his frees, he’d finally get that number 1 spot he's been telling me he'd get for years.”
“it’s the fact he doesn’t have to study as hard to easily get second top student in our year. besides, weren’t you just worrying about not being first this time ‘round?”
that set you off into another episode of wailing and worrying about your results.
reading the letter, your eyes zeroed in on a shiny gold badge attached to the bottom.
  dear kim y/n,  we are pleased to inform you that you have been chosen as head girl for this upcoming academic year. you will be working alongside the head boy, yang jungwon, and all prefects across the four houses. you and the head boy’s duties will be relayed to you after the sorting ceremony. congratulations once again, you are well deserving of the title. sincerely, headmaster bang si hyuk
you still remember your mother questioning you after watching your figure suddenly go from jumping around the kitchen all giddy, to sulkily dragging your feet to the table.
of course, you were honoured to be picked, but did they really have to choose your enemy as your partner? i mean, the whole school knows about your rivalry, and you guys have been told off countless times by teachers! so was this really a smart idea?
when the ceremony ended, one of the professors led you and yang to the head dormitories.
(a “benefit” of being one of the heads was getting your own room, separate from your own house dorms. but you’d still be sharing the common room with yang, so that wasn’t exactly the biggest plus in your books.)
“as you can see, you will have separate private rooms, each with their own bathroom,” the professor pointed at the doors on opposite sides of the common room.
“but you two will share this living space. there’s a little library in the corner as well. 
“now for rules..." he started listing a bunch of obvious rules - like what's allowed in the head dorms and what isn't, when you can bring your friends, etc.
“and last but not least, you aren’t allowed in each other’s private quarters,” he paused before glancing at both students. “although, i don’t think that’ll be a problem.” 
he’s right there, you thought bitterly.
the idea of even sharing the common room with the boy irked you, let alone entering his own room. you could only imagine all the stupid tricks he was planning on you right now - but you were doing the same.
after the whole ordeal, the professor finally left you two alone, but not before telling you that you should start planning out the prefects’ patrolling schedules so that you could meet up with them as soon as possible.
you and yang stared at each other for a moment, apprehension hanging in the air. this is the first time you two have directly looked each other in the eye tonight.
“so… i guess we should get to sorting out those schedules,” he breaks the silence, gesturing to the scroll of names in your hands, which the professor had left with you.
nodding, you followed him to the large table in the middle of the room, where you’d hold a meeting with the prefects tomorrow morning.
“here’s the list of all the prefects, plus their student ID numbers.”
“okay, we can use those to add them all into a group chat on hog-messages and inform them of the meeting tomorrow.”
one of the newer developments at hogwarts in recent years was the addition of electronic tablets given to every student, so they’d be able to communicate faster with each other. it had an app programmed within it called ‘hog-messages’ where students could message each other or their teachers, and create group chats, all activity being monitored by staff.
the tablets also allowed the students to be able to write notes down on it, but most teachers often preferred all homework to be written on paper scrolls anyway. 
all this was provided by yang enterprises.
yup. yang was the son of the wizard who introduced muggle electronic devices into the wizarding world, instantly boosting their family into riches and success.
the world was given to him on a silver platter, so he’s always had it easy. and unfortunately for you, the boy not only grew up snobby and privileged, but was smart too. 
coming from the muggle world, you entered the wizarding world with an open mind. despite this, you hated the ravenclaw almost as soon as you met him. 
his ego was high up through the roof way before he’d even been placed in the house, and he emanated a strong intimidating aura. as soon as yang saw you on that hogwarts train, he turned his nose up at you like you were dirt before you’d even spoken a word to each other.
nonetheless, you managed to work out a schedule together smoothly. but the lack of clashing heads for once put you on edge, you felt like something was just wrong.
“alright, i’ve sent a message to the group,” he said, staring at his screen.
“okay…” you trailed off, unsure what to say. “um, let’s be civil this year, yang,” you say instead, putting a hand out.
the boy looked up at you, before glancing down at your hand then laughed in disbelief. as if you had said you were going to run 100 laps around the castle.
“duh, i knew that when i got the letter. that doesn’t need to be said. are you an idiot?”
now it was you who stared at him in disbelief. there’s the yang you know.
lowering your hand, you scoffed and stormed into your room, which was luckily closer so you didn't have to spend another second looking at his pretty face.
you should have known nothing would ever change. you can’t believe you almost thought that yang had changed. of course he’d never grow up, maybe he was just made this way. 
on the other hand, the return of his ugly personality brought you some comfort. it was just something you were more familiar with. you weren’t used to the driven and focused attitude he had on earlier when sorting out the schedule, and you’d prefer to keep it that way. 
unpacking your bags and showering before changing into pajamas, you set an alarm for 6:30am, so you’d have time for the meeting at 7:30 and can end it before classes began at 8. you went to bed feeling prepared for tomorrow.
the next morning however, you woke up late. 
the sunlight seeped in through the curtains, and after a moment, you checked your phone for the time.
8:34am
crap.
you practically jumped out of bed and began to frantically get ready, pulling on the first shirt and skirt you could grab from your closet.
why hadn’t your alarm woken you up? you set the alarm two hours earlier. had you accidentally typed 630 into the calculator app instead from a tiring day?
however, when you check your alarm clock, you saw that it had been turned off. although, you clearly remember pressing save and checking that it was on before tucking yourself into bed.
you pause as you brush your hair, your thoughts coming to a stop.
it was yang, you realised. 
is this his idea of civil? you wonder what he's on as you slip on your uniform in panic. 
quickly brushing your teeth, you put on your tie as you ran out the room, a chill hits you when you remembered the prefects’ meeting you were supposed to have this morning.
oh my god, they probably think i'm an irresponsible head girl. there’s no doubt the bad impression being late on your first day as head girl would leave on not only the students, but the teachers as well. 
will they revoke your position? will they give the badge to another, more responsible girl? who preferably doesn’t have beef with the head boy? 
you cringed at the thought you might be punished because of something entirely yang’s fault, and he’d get away with it. as he always does. 
you ran down the moving stairs, almost slipping off the edge when it suddenly changed paths, towards your first class as you cursed out the head boy in your mind. 
but soon enough, nervousness took over as you neared the classroom.
there was only about 15 minutes left of the period, so was it even worth it to go? and besides, yang was in this class too. you’d hate to see the gloating smirk on his face when you enter and get scolded by the professor.
before you could decide however, the door opened, revealing the very boy you’d been planning revenge on all morning.
yang didn’t look surprised to see you there, evident by the grin on his face.
he faked a shocked tone though, when he announced your presence to the professor (and the whole class).
it goes without saying that you definitely had a bad morning, being held back in class for another half hour to make up for what you missed that morning. 
thankfully, you had a free period next, so you weren’t missing your next class this time.
although you hated yang jungwon with every fibre of your being, you weren’t a snitch. you wouldn’t dare expose him - mostly because it would be useless. who would really believe you, when you were already messing up so early in the year? and certainly not when it accused the school’s beloved heartthrob. 
so you took your punishment on without a complaint, pointedly ignoring yang the rest of the day, who didn’t even try to hide his smile.
you sighed as you made notes on griffin claw substitutes, all alone in the potions classroom.
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september and october rolled by; even though you and yang continued your little pranks and tricks on each other, you guys managed your head duties just fine. he did his work and never slacked, so you were satisfied.
you had gotten your revenge on yang by charming his wand to vibrate uncontrollably two days later. you remember barely being able to hold in your laugh as you watched him struggle to conjure a flock of birds, an explosion of feathers popping from the tip instead.
from what you heard, he also struggled in his other classes you didn’t share, which delighted you to no end. 
“what are you skipping around all giddy about?” hiyyih asked you sceptically.
“just that yang seems to be struggling in herbology class, according to jang wonyoung.”
“what did you do?” rei eyed suspiciously.
“how could you accuse me of doing something?” you gasped.
“it’s pretty obvious - head boy and student #2 wouldn’t just struggle in a class he’s always done well in,” minji shrugged.
you rolled your eyes at your friends, but then smiled cheekily when you admitted how you’d snuck into his room that morning and cast a charm on his wand with a spell that would only stop after twenty-four hours.
“okay, that’s pretty funny. i’m gonna have to ask wony about it later,” rei laughed. 
your phone buzzed, and upon checking it, you were surprised to see a text from the one and only yang jungwon.
Hog-Messages YANG JUNGWON (ID: 78395) professor kim wants to see us
“speak of the devil,” you tell your friends and show them your screen. 
you watched as the three glanced at each other, equally surprised.
“wow, a text! from yang jungwon! and it’s not some evil curse or cryptic message!” hiyyih remarked, which you nodded to in agreement. 
rei laughed. “you guys act like he’s incapable of simple communication; he’s just relaying a message.”
“sometimes rei, i think he is,” you joked.
YANG JUNGWON ID: 78395 professor kim wants to see us
KIM Y/N ID: 78384 when?
YANG JUNGWON ID: 78395 after classes today at his office
KIM Y/N ID: 78384 ofc it’s at his office, you think he’d want to meet us in the restrooms?
YANG JUNGWON ID: 78395 i hope u fall off your broom on the pitch also come un-charm my wand or something right now.
KIM Y/N ID: 78384 can’t 🤷‍♀️  sux 2 b u
"honestly, if i didn't know better, i'd think you two had a hate-love relationship," minji teased.
"ew, anything above dislike is something i will never feel for yang jungwon," you scrunched your nose in distaste. how could minji even think something like that?
"whatever," she snickered.
arriving in front of the professor’s office door, you opened it to find jungwon already inside and seated on one of the chairs opposite the teacher’s desk. you bowed in greeting before taking the other empty seat.
“so,” professor kim started. “we need to talk about your behaviour as the head students.”
you gulped. had you done something wrong? were those threats to revoke your position on the first day real? 
looking over at your co-partner, his face was unreadable, as always. he looked perfectly calm, which infuriated you.
“as head boy and girl, you two are setting the standard for the rest of the school. you guys are supposed to be role models. but i’m sure you already know this.” professor kim paused and looked at both of you intently before continuing.
“so why is it i’m finding out that you two have not been doing your patrols together?”
oh. so that’s what this is about.
you and yang had completed one patrol session together on the first week of school, and it’s safe to say that it was… horrific. without going into too much detail, you guys had practically argued the whole two hours that night; although it was unlikely, if there were any couples making out or young students causing trouble, they probably heard you two from a mile away and hid before they were caught.
at the end of the night, you both agreed that you’d just swap your schedules and patrol with other prefects - possibly the only thing you two had ever agreed on.
“we weren’t aware that we had to patrol together,” you replied when the head boy was clearly not going to speak up first. what a pussy.
it was a lie; you guys obviously knew that head students were supposed to patrol together. having been prefects in previous years, you knew how things worked. it was why you had done the first patrol together after all. 
but you figured that since it wasn’t a specifically given instruction, you didn’t actually have to do it together.
professor kim stared at you two incredulously for a moment, his expression somewhere between exasperation and disbelief. a pool of anxiousness swirled in your stomach at the way he sighed and pinched his nose bridge frustratedly.
“listen, i don’t know what si-hyuk was thinking when he had chosen you two as the heads, given your history and all. but he chose you. so please show that you’re worthy of the title - let go of your childish rivalry. otherwise, we may actually have to find new head students.”
“you could just let go of her, professor. i’d be able to work with any other girl,” yang finally spoke up. of course the first thing he'd say is an insult.
you gasped and glared at him. 
“clearly, you’re the one who’s childish and immature here. maybe you should be the one to get replaced.”
“enough!” the teacher slammed his hands on the desk. “if you two keep this act up, we will not hesitate to replace you both.”
and so with that, you and yang left the office in uncomfortable silence. not a word was spoken between you until just before you parted ways.
“guess we’ll use the old schedule again,” he said. you nodded.
being the end of the day, you were both too tired to argue. the heavy workload that comes with NEWTS in addition to the responsibilities of your positions, you both left for your own common rooms without sparing another glance.
the dreaded patrol round came sooner than you would have liked, and you found yang waiting by the castle doors. you always seemed to be the later one, as if he’d placed a curse on you with that trick at the start of the year.
he kicked himself off the wall he’d been leaning against when he saw you, and began to walk without so much as a ‘hi’ or ‘let’s go’. you had to quickly jog to catch up to him.
the air between you two as you walked around was silent and tense, so thick that you could probably cut it with a knife.
surprisingly, yang was the first to break the silence.
“i was thinking - we should plan the first hogsmeade trip for this term.”
“mhm,” you hummed in agreement. “i think it’s best to have it after the quidditch match in november.”
“yeah, at the end of the month. and people would be able to go before the winter break.”
you fished your phone out from your pocket and opened the calendar app.
“when should we have it?"
yang leaned over your shoulder to look at your screen. “let’s have it on the twenty-seventh," he says, pointing at the date on the calendar. "it’d be good to have the week between the match and the trip free so we can prepare.”
you nodded as you listened, typing up a reminder to speak with the professors about it. 
“hey!” the head boy suddenly shouted, causing you to jump. “what are you kids doing here?”
you looked up to find he had opened a classroom, in which three students in around 4th or 5th year were standing. they stared up at the pair of you with wide eyes, like a dear in headlights.
“what are you doing?” you asked, regaining your composure. looking at their ties, you realised they were in slytherin, like you.
the students glanced at each other worriedly and slowly backed away from the two of you. you noticed them hiding something behind them on the desk.
pointing your wand at the items behind them, you summoned it nonverbally, yelling ‘accio!’ in your mind. the items flew into your arms.
“you all better go back to your common room. it’s way past your curfew,” yang warned them. “20 points from slytherin.”
the group shuffled out of the room and quickly ran back to the dungeons.
“isn’t 20 too many?” you grumbled. maybe you were a little biased since they were in your house though.
ignoring you, yang sighed as he turned back to look at the contents in your hands.
“what is it?” he asked.
upon closer inspection, it seemed to be the plannings or blueprint of a large snake puppet that moved on its own, the quote ‘slytherin slays’ painted along its body.
you held back a giggle as you read the notes on how to make the snake glare and breathe flames out when faced with a ravenclaw. yang snorted as he read them as well.
“you slytherins are always so immature when it comes to quidditch matches.” you rolled your eyes and glared at him, imagining you were breathing flames like the puppet snake.
“at least we have a strong sense of support for our house. what’re you birdies doing? painting little flying banners that the players won’t be able to read on the pitch?”
“my team doesn’t need to read our house’s support. we’re good enough and know if.”
“sounds like there’s just no house spirit.”
“say that to me when your team loses,” he challenged.
“you’ll be waiting forever then,” you retorted.
“let’s place a bet. 20 galleons that ravenclaw wins.”
“fine! if we wins, i want you to pay my monthly subscription in an online game for a year."
“what?”
“i need money," you huff, crossing your arms indignantly.
“you need muggle money.”
“well, yes. but i mean, you can convert your wizarding money into muggle money, then pay for my monthly subscription in a game so i get game money.”
“that sounds useless; for a kids’ game? and you called me the childish one?” he raised a questioning eyebrow.
“i wouldn’t need to find peace in an online game if you didn’t bother me all the time, you know," you complain. "you’re like a piece of gum i can’t get off my shoe.”
“you could just cast a spell to get the gum off,” he shrugged.
“you’re right, i’ll just cast a spell on you!” you smile brightly. “stupe-“
“oh my god, okay! i’ll pay for your stupid game - if slytherin wins, which you won’t.”
you smiled to yourself, a skip in your step for the rest of the patrol.
soon, the day of the match arrived; ravenclaw against slytherin (because of course it was). 
the morning of the match was lively as usual, everyone split between green and blue. 
you watched the large snake float above everyone’s heads in the great hall, breathing (harmless) flames into every ravenclaw’s face. 
just at that moment, you bumped into the trio of students who’d been planning the little surprise. you sent them a discreet smile.
“20 points to slytherin,” you awarded for the clever trick, but also to make up for the twenty that yang had taken.
suddenly, you screech when a flock of small origami birds flew and pecked at your hair, ruining the braid you’d put your hair in for the match. 
looking up, you noticed the small paper birds flying about the hall, pecking at every slytherin-supporter. this was definitely ravenclaw’s idea; no doubt yang had gotten inspiration from the those students you two had caught.
“you good, kim?” a familiar voice greets you. you turn to see the devil himself smirking at you, pleased with the mess you are.
“i was, until you got here.”
“maybe it’s a sign that you’ll lose today.”
“maybe it’s a sign you should shut up.”
the match started without a hitch. 
you scored the first 10 points of the match within 6 minutes, and by the first half hour, slytherin was ahead by 30 points. 
you enjoyed the thrill of being a chaser, trying different ways to get the quarrel past the keeper. in fact, you enjoyed flying in general, and being on the pitch.
that is until, you started getting pestered by the other team’s seeker.
you noticed yang seemed to be flying around you after a few laps, and sent him a questioning look.
“what are you doing, yang?”
“looking for the snitch, it’s my job.”
“well, i’m not the snitch. so keep looking!”
“well i’m certainly looking at a similar word.”
it took time to process what he meant, but when you realised, you glared at the boy.
“focus on the game- if you keep your eyes on me, you’ll be paying for my subscription soon!”
yang scoffed and looked away, searching the pitch for the snitch, sending you a glare before zooming away.
the game ended in slytherin’s favour, your team’s seeker barely clutching the golden ball in his hands before the head boy could reach it.
cheers roared across the stadium when it ended with your team’s success, students running onto the pitch in excitement to congratulate you and the other players.
“seriously, the way you threw the quaffle into the hoop while gliding through the air - it was so smooth!” minji gushed as rei nodded in agreement. 
“let’s go, there’s going to be a congratulatory party in the common room!” rei says, taking your hand to drag you.
“can i come?” asked hiyyih excitedly, who was a gryffindor.
“duh!”
you laughed as you followed your three best friends, when you caught sight of a certain person in the corner of your eye.
“wait, i have to do something real quick,” you pause to tell the girls. they stopped as well and looked at you curiously.
“what is it?”
“wait for me. i just need to talk to yang - head stuff,” you tell them off-handedly, before running off to the ravenclaw team.
“it’s definitely not about ‘head stuff’,” hiyyih nudges rei, who nods as they watch you leave.
you make your way to the losing ravenclaw team, even congratulating some of them on a good game. 
when you reach your target, you tap on his shoulder to get his attention, before smiling triumphantly up at him (wow, you never realised how much taller he was than you until now).
“what is it, kim?” he drawled with an eye-roll.
“the bet. i won.” you gloated, the smile never leaving your face, widening instead when he wore a look of disbelief.
“oh, right.” he sighed before scratching the back of his head, looking around thoughtfully. “let’s sort it out tomorrow, at patrol.”
“okay! don’t back down from your end of the bet.” 
“i may hate you, but i’m not a sore loser. see you tomorrow night, kim.”
“with my monthly subscription payment!” you say, waving tauntingly as you ran back to your friends.
“what did you need to talk to him about?” minji asked, putting her hand out to hold yours as you four made your way to the slytherin dungeons.
“we’re making monthly plans to help a student who needs it,” you say smugly.
“sounds like you’re twisting the truth,” rei laughed.
“but it is the truth!” you protested.
you found yourself happily scrolling through the game's catalog, looking to spend your newly-bought robux.
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ever since your deal on the match, you found yourself slowly warming up to yang.
well, not to the point you’d consider each other friends, but you acknowledge each other in passing with a nod or quick wave instead of pointedly looking the other way like usual.
you also argued less, much to the relief of the entire school. however, they were still apprehensive, waiting for something to blow up eventually. it was simply too suspiciously calm and quiet without your voices yelling down the hall or in the corner of a classroom.
as the weeks went on, you two learned to get along better and better everyday, even willingly becoming partners in potions once.
sometimes, you would walk to the great hall together for lunch or dinner after a meeting. you even spent your free periods with yang, which you told your friends was because ‘they didn’t have any frees with you’ so you ‘might as well spend it productively’ with the head boy who coincidentally shared the same free periods schedule.
you did lots of stuff together, as expected of the head girl and head boy.
yet, you always avoided studying together.
others might think it’s because of your rivalry; how one might copy off the other’s or something.
sure, you laugh to yourself. let people think what they want.
but the idea of studying with yang again brings back memories of fifth year.
you didn’t tell anyone about it, not even your own friends. 
at the end of the year, you’d been practically glued to the library for two months, studying for your OWLs.
“mind if i sit here?” 
you turn up to see a familiar face.
“yang?”
“there’s no other free space in the library,” he rolled his eyes, making up an excuse.
looking around, you realised he was right. the only other free spots were next to students that were notoriously weirdos who everyone avoided. maybe he doesn’t want them to copy off his work, you think to yourself.
“um, okay,” you agreed hesitantly while sucking on a sugar quill, moving some of your books to make space for him. those sweets often helped you focus.
yang pulled the seat out and sat down, before beginning to study himself.
you tried to continue as you were, but had lost focus. not even the green apple-flavoured sweet in your mouth could help you concentrate.
you were hyper aware of his presence - the way he hunched over the table with his hair falling over his face. you watched him from the corner of your eye.
why had he chosen to sit with you? were there seriously no better places to go? what about his room? the astronomy tower? the little corner window by the potions classroom downstairs?
“relax. i can feel how tense you are from here.”
“does your oh-so-precious pure-wizard blood give you the ability to sense emotions like a dog?” you scoffed. he looked up sharply and gave you a serious look.
“i just want to revise for my OWLs; let’s keep our disputes outside the library, where we won’t get hexed by madame park over there.”
you rolled your eyes and kept your head down, going back to your own business.
over the course of the month, a routine slowly began wherein you would often study together in the library. 
sometimes it was you joining him instead, and you would just wordlessly take the seat opposite him. even when there were other spaces to sit, you two always chose to sit together in the corner table, hidden from the rest of the school.
a word was never spoken between the two top students. and you never told your friends about the little arrangement either.
his presence quickly became something of a comfort for you - it was easier to focus on your studies when he was there. and if you ever needed help with something, he’d give you a few pointers when you finally begrudgingly asked.
he never asked you for help though, which always reminded you why he was number 2. it infuriated you how you had to work twice as hard than him just to barely surpass the boy.
whenever you heard people talking of him in passing, he was always nicknamed ‘the prodigy boy’. what were you called? ‘the girl that was good for a muggle-born’.
he was your rival, but you weren’t his. and he’s made that clear since the day you met.
and yet, despite all the resentment you held for him, you enjoyed his company. OWLs were stressing the life out of everyone, but it felt like you could get through it with him sitting across you.
maybe it’s because he motivated you to keep working harder, to try more so you could widen the gap between your ranks. seeing him everyday reminded you of why you tried so hard. maybe you wanted to show him (and everyone else) that being muggle-born doesn’t mean you’re any less than those born in this world. 
at least that’s what you told yourself. 
but it doesn’t explain why you began to glance at his lips every time he sat across you. 
it doesn’t explain why butterflies began to flutter in your stomach when you felt the warmth of his body close to yours as he’d lean over your shoulder and point at the book when you asked for help. or why you felt giddy when you’d play with each other’s feet under the table.
until one day, he’d dropped his smart-quill on the floor, and you were quicker to kneel down from your seat to get it. 
“here,” you said, handing him the quill, still on your knees on the floor.
as you faced him, you realised the close proximity only then. 
you stared into his eyes that pulled you in, keeping you locked and unable to escape from his gaze. he stared right back, the quill forgotten in your hand, which now lay on his left knee.
you didn’t even realise the way he slowly leaned down until he cupped your cheek.
his touch was soft; you leaned into it. 
“is this okay?” you could barely hear him whisper over the rapid beating of your heart. all you could do was nod.
your eyes fluttered shut as your lips finally connected. a mix of pretty emotions burst in your stomach, filling you with a giddiness you never knew before.
it might have been just a few seconds, or it could have been hours - you didn’t know. that first kiss was everything you ever imagined it to be.
you pulled away first, finally running out of air. but he chased after your lips, kissing you again. 
the memory of your first kiss will forever be cemented in your memory. you were just two 16 year olds, softly holding onto each other in the corner of a library, hidden from the rest of the world.
you scrunch your nose at the bittersweet memory. who would’ve thought your first kiss would be with the person you hate the most in this world. 
when you returned to school for sixth year that september, yang acted like nothing happened between you two. 
he ignored you for the first month of school, not even bothering to taunt you like he used to. everyone had been stumped, including you, but he eventually went back to his usual tactics, albeit with a noticeable lack of ‘stupid muggleborn who can never be on our level’ comments. soon you two were back to your regular bickering as if he didn’t ignore your existence for the first month of school. 
as if you hadn’t shared a kiss just three months before.
now, your developing friendship scared you. you didn’t want a repeat of last time; his actions had really hurt you back then.  
you remember all the nights you spent in the library, waiting. waiting for him to come, to explain why he was acting like that. waiting for something.
thoughts ran through your mind, trying to reason why he might do this. maybe he realised he didn't feel for you the way you felt for him. maybe he went back to his room that night and wiped all the muggle germs off his face. maybe he realised he was too good for you.
you remember all the times you cried yourself to sleep, eyes puffy for weeks that even your teachers asked if you were okay. if maybe you’d eaten something bad or been cursed. that maybe you should go to the infirmary to fix it.
hiyyih, rei, and minji had no idea how to help you, because you refused to tell them what was wrong. 
and you never did. it’s simply too embarrassing. explaining that you kissed your number one enemy and then he ignored you for month and acted like nothing happened between you two was humiliating. you knew your friends wouldn’t, but surely if other students found out, they’d laugh at you.
yang probably laughed with his friends about it. you were just waiting, dreading to hear the rumours of how you’re a bad kisser and how no one should ever want your muggle-born, good-for-nothing ass. 
every time you walked past him and his friends, you’d walk faster and look everywhere but their direction. you imagined their snickers and smirks as they watched you run by like a pathetic loser.
the rumours never came however. 
no one ever looked at you weirdly, or laughed at you. you ended sixth year with a big sigh of relief, releasing a breath you didn't realise you'd been holding the whole year.
now, you found yourself standing next to the very boy who you had spent the end of your 5th year with, walking a big group of students towards hogsmeade.
you sigh as you think about your astronomy test on monday, which you’d rather spend the weekend studying for.
unfortunately, as the heads, it’s you and yang’s duty to chaperone the students on their trip to the village. 
you sigh and pull on your strap, hiking your heavy bag higher up your back. you think of the long day ahead, studying in the corner of one of the quieter cafés, freezing your toes off. it’s not preferable, but it’ll have to do.
yang watches you, eyeing your heavy bag of books.
“what the hell? don’t tell me you’re spending this trip studying.”
“alright, i won’t,” you roll your eyes at him as you two trudge behind the large crowd of students. it was 9 in the morning, and you were too tired to reply.
“wouldn’t you rather spend your time with your friends? you somehow have those,” he teased.
“well yeah,” you huff, a little irritated at his care-free attitude. “but not everyone can pass an astronomy test without needing to study like you. some of us actually have to work our butts off for good grades.”
yang stopped in his tracks, causing you to follow and look back at him questioningly.
to your surprise, he wore a serious expression, glaring forward and refusing to look at you. you must’ve struck a nerve.
“stop acting like you’re the only one in the world that has to fucking work hard,” he fumed. you’ve never seen him this mad, even in all your arguments throughout the years. 
“you’re always going on about how much you have to study this, how you need to work harder than me that - blah blah blah. 
“why do you always feel the need to undermine my work? always downplaying my accomplishments to ‘mere talent’. what about the tens of hundreds of hours i’ve poured into my own studies? the hours i’ve spent sat by a tutor since i was 6?”
surprised by his outburst in combination with your own irritation and jealousy, you couldn’t help but retort.
“are you serious right now? do you have to make everything about yourself?”
“oh because the world revolves around you? you are so fucking entitled!”
“me? entitled?” you laugh in disbelief. “you’re talking about how i undermine and downplay your work, when you’ve always been the one to yell out to the whole world how i’m a ‘stupid, pathetic muggleborn who’s lacking and can never fit in this world’!” students were beginning to notice your argument and were looking behind as they walked at you two now.
“so that’s what this is about? some shit i said two years ago?” he scoffed.
“some shit you threw at me for 5 years!” you throw your hands up in frustration.
“well maybe you’re proving me right with all your talk about just how much you need to study because you’ll 'never have it as easy as us'!” he yelled right back, mocking you. “you don’t know a thing about me.” 
you stared at him, panting heavily. everyone’s attention was now on you two, people watching instead of walking.
“kim y/n! yang jungwon!” you hear the booming voice of professor kim shout over the crowd. 
he stormed to you two, face red and veins popping out his neck.
“this behaviour is incredibly inappropriate of role model students! you two are supposed to be guiding the students towards the village, is that such a difficult task?” he scolded you and yang in exasperation.
“could you at least keep your feud behind closed doors? it’s incredibly selfish to ruin everyone’s day with your constant fights!”
you looked down ashamedly as your friends took this as their sign to finally drag you from your spot. jungwon’s friend, nishimura riki from 5th year copied their actions.
professor kim looked at the crowd which had now completely stopped to watch the show. 
“keep moving kids!” he sighed, shaking his head in disappointment.  
“park gunwook,” he called. the gryffindor jogged towards the teacher. “pham hanni.” the hufflepuff followed. “you two will take over the role of chaperoning the students, since our head students are clearly unsuitable for the job,” he instructed, throwing you a dirty look. 
the two 6th year prefects nodded and began to walk behind everyone, feeling a little awkward at being put on the spot. 
you glared at yang one more time, but was met with a different expression instead.
yang met your stare with concern written on his face, as his tall friend dragged him away. it confused you; just a moment ago, he’d been furious with you, and now he looked worried? what was he worried about? what’s with the switch up?
you couldn’t ponder on it any longer, what with your own friends shuffling you away from the crime scene.
the rest of the day was spent tucked away in a little corner of a small café you found, one people didn’t go to as much.
the girls had tried to convince you to join them on their fun, but let you go when you told them you had star charts to memorise for your upcoming test. they seemed hesitant, but after witnessing your recent fight with the head boy, they reluctantly allowed you to go off on your own with promises of saving you a butterbeer.
you busied yourself with your books, not wanting to think about the weird events this morning. from your first disagreement in a while, to yang’s mood swing - it was better to spend your thoughts on what was more important.
eventually, you woke up in the late afternoon, only realising then that you had fallen asleep. the rays of light from the sunset seeped through the window, waking you up with its blinding brightness. 
how long had you fallen asleep? you could have been revising in the time you dozed off. astronomy was your weakest subject, so you really needed that precious time.
you groan in frustration, sighing as you sit up to straighten your back. but something falls off your shoulders as you do. 
you look behind you and realise it was a jacket, which had been left on your shoulders by someone. but who?
bewildered, you pick up the jacket (which had an oddly familiar scent to it) and turn back to your table of books. but before you can return to your studies, something catches your eye.
there, on top of a pile of textbooks, lay a green sugarquill. 
had my friends stopped by while i slept?
it didn’t particularly make sense though, since you agreed to meet up with them later tonight when you headed back to the castle. 
you picked it up, then noticed the note it had been sitting on.
sorry, i shouldn’t have said any of that earlier.  found you sleeping, don’t beat yourself up. you can do this. i remember sugarquills help you focus, right? don’t worry, it’s not poisoned or anything… goodluck on monday.
your heart squeezed painfully. his short message spoke volumes.
yang jungwon wasn’t one to apologise, seeing as he either never felt bad, or never really did anything wrong (in the eyes of everyone else).
you felt guilty too, seeing as it was your fault as well. you made a mental note to apologise to him in person later.
secondly, this was the first time he ever acknowledged the time you spent together in 5th year. it surprised you, because at this point you wondered if he had forgotten about it, or if it was all some sick dream you had.
heat rushed to your face and you had to put considerable effort into keeping your composure and not kick your feet and screaming right then and there. somehow, he’d remembered such a small detail about the sweet he left for you.
maybe the whole 5th year incident affected him more than he let on. maybe there really was something that happened between you guys.
or maybe you’re just being hopeful again. 
one thing you’re sure about though, is that yang jungwon is most certainly crazy.
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“welcome back everyone!” you greeted.
it’s the first prefect meeting of the term, everyone who left for the winter break having just returned two days prior.
“we have quite a bit to discuss today,” you started, before looking at jungwon to continue.
“let’s start with the more interesting news first.” he paused, looking at everyone before going on.
“me and the head girl have been planning something this winter, and with the approval of the headmaster, we can finally reveal it to you: the spring ball.”
you watched proudly as the prefects began whispering amongst themselves excitedly. you were so hyped up to be able to plan and make the event come to life.
“we wanted to give the students something more exciting to look forward to. you know- before OWLs and NEWTs completely take over our lives,” you joke, pulling chuckles out of everyone in the room.
“the idea is a formal, floral-themed event that’ll take place in the great hall. it’s only for 5th years and up, but younger years may attend if invited as a date.”
“since you guys are prefects, we’re asking for your help setting up the event. let’s talk ideas for decoration,” you say, pulling out your tablet to take notes.
as you wrote down the prefects’ thoughts and input, you were already drafting a schedule in your mind for preparations. that was until, you felt someone lean over your shoulder.
forcing yourself to keep writing, you tried to ignore the way your shoulder brushed against yang’s chest. one hand holding onto the backrest of your chair whilst the other lay on the table, next to your arm as you wrote on autopilot, your mind circuiting at the proximity. straightening your back in an attempt to compose yourself, you only push yourself against the boy more.
you were sure your face was as red as a tomato. your heart was beating so hard you were scared jungwon could hear it.
judging by the way he huffed in amusement, he probably realised the effect he had on you. 
“focus, kim,” he whispered so only you could hear, leaning lower to your level. you could imagine the smirk on his face.
“i am,” you tried to say with as much nonchalance as you could.
honestly, the moment was really reminding you of all those times he’d helped in the library. deja vu was really hitting you hard right now.
the rest of the meeting went smoothly - at least, as smooth as it could be with yang constantly flustering you as he subtly kept grazing your skin. 
now that you think about it, jungwon’s been acting strange lately. more… bold? that’s the best way you could explain it.
you don’t know how it happened, but ever since the hogsmeade trip, you two got closer. after you apologised to him, the incident in question was never spoken of again, never referred to. but it’s clear something shifted in your relationship with the head boy.
gradually, he began to fill up your everyday life, seeing him more often in the day than you used to.
in the mornings, you’d bump into each other in the common room after getting ready, and go down to the great hall for breakfast together. or, if one of you seemed to be running late after breakfast, you’d make sure to save some food and leave it in the common room for the other.
in the day, you two shared free periods, and so spent it lounging in the common room, simply doing work at the coffee table or reading a book on the couch. music would play in the background as you two sat in comfortable silence, basking in each other’s company.
in the evenings, you might come back from a late class to find him napping on the couch. so you’d shake him awake with a “jungwon, let’s go get dinner.”
you could be studying in the library corner of your shared living space, and he’d always remind you to eat. even when it was past any meal time, he’d drag you off the chair for a trip to the kitchens, where he’d get a house elf to make you two a snack. he often asked for eclairs, noticing it was your favourite.
but yang jungwon didn’t just take up your daily activities, he was always on your mind too.
thoughts of how he wouldn’t like the cold dim lights of the slytherin common room, or seeing students that he’s told you he isn’t particularly fond of floated in your mind when you visited your friends.
you even found yourself comparing him to characters in whatever series you absorbed yourself in. you seriously couldn’t stop thinking about him.
the fights stopped completely, but you two continued your flirting friendly banter all the time.
once, you managed to find time in your busy schedule to sit down and watch barbie movies. jungwon (when did you even start calling him that?) had walked in to the common room to find his bag which he had left there, only to see you huddled up in a blanket while watching barbie as the island princess magically projected onto the wall.
“what’s this?” he’d asked.
“muggle movies from my childhood. this girl here grew up on the island when one day, she was found by a prince who was intrigued by her, and brought her back to the city, where she finally learns who she really is,” you explained while keeping your eyes trained on the projection.
“and who is she really?”
“why don’t you sit down and watch, kitty?” you’d always called him by that nickname during your petty fights, since his face reminded you of a cute cat. now though, it became more of an endearing nickname for the boy.
“i have to write 10 inches on the use of the lumos solem spell by tuesday.”
“that’s 5 days away! come on, don’t you wanna know? it’s really good, i promise. we can watch from the start, and i’ll help you with that charms essay, since professor song assigned it to us to, and i already got started on it,” you asked, twisting to face him with the best pleading look you could muster.
“fine, but only because you begged," he relented with a playful smile.
so that’s how you ended up binging barbie movies into the wee hours of the morning, sharing a blanket with your proclaimed enemy on the sofa.
“you honestly look more like serafina,” you tease him.
“what? but she’s a girl! wouldn’t wolfie be a better fit?”
“but serafina has more cat-like eyes! you guys have similar eyes.”
“are you serious right now? they’re both cats!” he gestures to the movie, paused at the last scene.
“but you really look like her!” you insist, using both hands to point at each corner of his eyes, shifting closer to him. “they’re upturned.”
“didn’t realise you knew that about me, babe.” he wrapped his own hands around your wrists, as they hovered above his face. “if i’m serafina, you must be wolfie.”
“why? because we’re partners in crime?” you snorted at his suggestion. “they get married at the end and have a bunch of little kitties too. you want that?”
“if that’s what you’d like,” he shrugged, his lips pulling into a downwards smile.
you stared at him incredulously, heartbeat suddenly pounding as you looked into the growing smug look on his face. his eyes that managed to shine even in the dark never failed to root you on the spot, unable to look away.
what were you feeling? you've looked at jungwon so many times over the past 5 years, but the boy's gaze never made you feel like this way before. like you were floating on air; like you could do anything with him by your side, looking at you like that.
in fact, thinking back to all your years of knowing him, it's funny how much things have changed in the past several months.
you actually giggle a bit, sitting back, further from his warmth. you immediately miss the soft touch of his fingers around your wrists.
"what are you laughing about?" he asks, but he's laughing too.
"you. me; us."
"are we comedians now or something?"
"no, but we're definitely clowns of the circus." jungwon grinned at your statement, an amused huff escaping his lips.
"penny for your thoughts?"
"i was just thinking... how did we go from having wars in the middle of DADA in 3rd year, to watching muggle barbie movies at 2am on a saturday?" you think out loud.
"when you put it like that... we do sound like the comedy act of a show," he admits, scratching the back of his neck.
"at least i do."
"what do you mean?" you ask, shifting your position on the couch to sit up. you move your cold feet so they rest between jungwon's ankles, soaking in their warmth.
"our little feud - you know, the fights, the hexes, all that. it was all because of me."
"what? no it wasn't - i instigated a lot of them too," you say, trying to reassure him. was he feeling guilty and blaming himself?
"but, it was! honestly, if it wasn't for my stupid shallow thinking, we might've been friends way earlier." you looked at him patiently, nodding for him to continue.
"i used to think that muggle-borns were stupid and would fall behind in everything - school, work, just because you had no idea of how our world worked. honestly, i pitied and felt sorry for you guys, because i thought you could never be on our level. i know now how ignorant i was, obviously," he scoffed at himself.
"so when i met you, i thought you were an idiot. you are, don't get me wrong-" he teased you, causing you to roll your eyes, although smiling lightly. "but even though you're muggle-born, you always managed to do better than me.
"you were constantly the best student in our year- no, our school. you were faster at understanding concepts than i was, immediately getting things right on the first try. hell, even when i would go flying on the pitch to relieve my stress and then got recruited into the ravenclaw team in third year, i finally thought i was better than you at something. and then you joined your team in 4th, and was called the 'ace' of slytherin. what a blow all of that to was to my ego."
"i joined the team to annoy you," you shyly admit. "but why did you even think that in the first place?" you asked, not angry. you wanted to hear him out and finally get answers to questions you've asked yourself for so many years. you wanted to understand, and know the boy in front of you.
"well, you know that my father's company is successful. so growing up, i was given the best. my parents hired the best tutors for me, so i'd be ahead of everyone else when i started hogwarts. my teachers said i was their best student, my parents showed me off to their friends as their 'pride and joy' or something dumb like that. other parents compared their kids to me, i was that kid.
"i knew i was privileged though - that i had money and could afford to have this good education. so i made the best of it and constantly told myself that others would be lucky to have my life, so i wanted to prove i was worthy of it by working hard and pushing myself all my life.
"but with that, i developed the mindset that people who don't have money like i do can't have as much knowledge as me since they don't have access to it - and that included muggle-borns. you had zero knowledge of this world, which works incredibly different to yours. we have different moral compasses; notions of common sense; understanding of how things worked.
"so imagine how surprised i was to find that you were doing better than me in school. me, who had sat beside a tutor since i was 6, who was learning OWL content at 12. all this only for a girl who didn't even know magic existed until a month before to top me in school.
"that's why i was always angry; i was angry with my tutors for not teaching me better; at you for being better. but most especially at myself. for deluding myself into thinking that way." you two were silent for a moment.
"what changed?" you asked.
jungwon breathed in, preparing himself.
"5th year. i was finally learning to respect you, so when i walked into the library that was full of students, you seemed like the best option to sit next to."
"really? still hadn't gotten over that 'i'm better than everyone blah blah blah' attitude?" you asked, smugly tilting your head to the side.
"shush," he hid his face. "but... i got to learn how hard you really worked back then. i used to think you just had some gift for learning. but watching you with your head down for hours, i felt like i was discrediting all that with something like 'innate talent'.
"i went back home that summer confused and having a mid-life crisis at 16. my dad talked to me though, knocked some sense into me.
"he said that just because muggles don't know magic, doesn't mean they can't do anything. i mean, the whole idea of smart devices that our company is literally known for was taken from muggles! without you guys, we wouldn't have that in our world either. you created it, we just used magic to expand it.
"i was pretty shaken up after that, and was in a daze when 6th year started. it took me a while to sort my thoughts out and gather myself."
it was silent for a while, now nearing 3am.
jungwon just spilled out his guts to you, in the dim atmosphere of your common room. now you were the one collecting your thoughts.
"i'm sorry too."
"what? you never did anyth-"
"but i basically did the same thing as you. you studied for years and years, and i just always thought you were also naturally smart; that you never needed to study like i did because you already knew it all."
silence enveloped the two of you once again.
"...so i guess we're more similar than we thought, huh?" he smiled softly at you. you felt like you were floating again.
"i guess so."
jungwon unfolded his legs and opened his arms out as a gesture, which you gladly accepted and fell into his embrace.
"so, are we good now?" you asked.
"hmm, i still feel like you owe me something for all those years of endless anger and feeling like shit."
"you mean for enlightening you that we stupid muggles aren't so stupid?" you asked, face still buried in his chest, your voice muffled against his sweatshirt. "shouldn't you owe me? for teaching you a lesson?"
"but i want something," he pouted, pulling on your wrist.
"what is it? as long as its affordable."
"is going to the spring ball with me affordable?"
you turn your head to look up at him, who's looking down at you with shy eyes, waiting for your answer.
"i don't know... how much does it cost?" you play along. you already know your answer anyway.
"it'll cost you about..." he pulled out the calculator app on his phone, pretending to add up a total. "one kiss."
you laughed at him, finally pulling away from his arms.
"was that at the end of 5th year not enough?"
"no," he pouted, eyebrows knitted. so cute, you thought.
"alright then, but is it okay if i pay you that hefty price later at the ball?" jungwon sighed dramatically, crossing his arms and rolling his eyes.
"i guess... but the price might increase to 10."
"that's okay, i'll give you as many as you want, as long as the first one is special."
"i didn't know you were sentimental like that," he smirked at you, kissing your cheek. you shrugged nonchalantly, smiling at him.
"i didn't know you were so needy for kisses like that."
"touché," he laughed, dragging you in for another hug, cuddling you until you both fell asleep in each other's arms.
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since that night, you and jungwon gradually learned to be comfortable each other. and with the ball preparations, there was lots of opportunities to do so.
you realised that - without the hostility between you two, it was much easier to find compromises when you disagreed on something. jungwon did things differently from you, but listened to your thoughts and offered his too.
as the weeks went on, you found yourself looking forward to meetings with him, missing his presence when he wasn’t with you.
something in the way he’d nudge you lightly when you were worried about something, wrap his arm around you and squeeze your shoulder, or simply smile at you brightly with those cat-like eyes of his - they were all comforting.
the change in atmosphere didn’t go unnoticed by your friends either.
"what was that??" rei interrogated you when jungwon pulled you aside for the nth time this week.
"oh, he just wanted to talk about putting up decor later," you answer nonchalantly, taking a bite out of your toast.
"he has the same conversation with you practically every day," minji rolled her eyes.
"yeah, and i'm more surprised that you don't come ranting to us about every interaction you two have," hiyyih agrees, eyeing you suspiciously.
"well, i just grew up and matured," you try to defend yourself.
"if growing up and maturing means developing a crush, then yeah. you sure did." rei pauses before continuing. "is there something you aren't telling us?"
technically, yes. you weren't telling them about the development between you and jungwon - at least not yet. but you didn't exactly have a crush on the boy, in the sense that it was a one-sided thing and you were too shy to confess. but you didn't really want to tell them what was going on between you two, because you didn't know yourself.
were you and jungwon friends(-ish)? yes. but were you dating? no, definitely not. there's no doubt though that your strange, blurry, undefined relationship will develop soon enough, and you'd rather wait until everything's clear before telling your friends.
"she's not saying anything - something is definitely up!" hiyyih gasped excitedly, causing rei and minji to giggle, and you to shake your head.
you had noticed that jungwon seemed to always find reasons to talk to you, even if it's little things you've already discussed before, or silly simple questions like 'how's your day going?' or 'what barbie movie are we watching tonight?'
yeah, you two often found yourselves watching barbie movies late into a friday night.
you also ended up cuddling on the couch almost every evening after a long day of duties, particularly on patrol nights. after your rounds, you two would head back up to the head dormitories, where you'd flop onto the couch, and he'd jump onto you soon after.
the others would go crazy if they ever found out, you laugh to yourself.
the next day would be the night of the ball, so you were pretty wrapped up in helping out throughout the day.
"everything's set up," haerin, a 5th year gryffindor prefect told you.
"it looks really good," you tell her, looking at the great hall. it looked great now, and you were excited for how it would turn out in the dark of the night later.
"did you manage to complete the spell?" she asked curiously.
"i did, but i'm only 89.7% sure it'll work," you say, biting your lip. you hated not being completely sure about something, like an answer, or in this case - a self-made spell.
you turn when you hear a laugh behind you.
"i like how you have a specific percentage even when it comes to feelings," jungwon says through a grin. "your brain works weirdly"
"whatever, kitty," you roll your eyes light heartedly at him.
facing the great hall again, you take a deep breath as you cast the spell on the great hall, chanting the incantation as you wave your wand.
in a moment, the hall was filled with falling petals of different colours, though they didn't litter the ground messily, simply disappearing when they reached the ground. vines reached out from between the tiled floor, wrapping around table legs and growing bright vibrant flowers of their own. small orbs of light flickered throughout the ceiling, like fairies illuminating the scene.
"wow, it looks amazing, y/n!" one of the professors helping around praised.
"it really does," jungwon says, snaking his arm around your waist, his hand clinging onto your side snuggly.
"thank you," you mumble, as you both look up at the pretty scene in front of you.
soon, night falls and you're running down the staircase with your friends, holding up the ends of your dress to avoid stepping on it.
"careful y/n! or you might trip!" you hear hiyyih call out from behind you.
"she's just excited to see her prince charming," minji laughs, but the three of them are also running, holding up their own dresses.
the doors of the great hall open, revealing the breathtakingly decorated room, some guests already having arrived at the scene.
"wow, this is amazing..." rei gasped, enchanted by the way coloured lights perfectly illuminate the hanging wisteria flowers, and butterflies fluttering throughout the room.
"you seriously outdid yourself. how did you even do this?" hiyyih asked.
"only y/n could make a spell as complicated as this," jungwon's voice says, announcing his presence. "you look good, by the way," he adds when you look at him.
a quick one-over of his look tonight does not do him justice. so you find yourself staring unashamedly at his figure.
the way his waistcoat hugs his figure emphasises his broad shoulders, something you didn't even realise you found attractive until you saw it on him. a red tie lazily tucked into the waistcoat plus the rolled-up sleeves - it all made your mind go haywire.
"you would know, having been subjected to all the spells she's made over the years," hiyyih laughs at the memory.
"didn't know you spent so much time thinking about me, kim," he goaded.
"oh trust me, she def-" you cut rei off by covering her mouth with your gloved hand.
"thanks, jungwon," you say quickly, giving him a smile and pushing your friends away.
"he was flirting with you!" rei loudly whispers into your ear.
"and what do you want me to do about it!" you say, making sure your friends couldn't see the deep blush on your face.
"flirt back!" minji huffs out exasperatedly. "i'm sick and tired of whatever has been going on between you two for years!"
"yes, please just end it tonight! whether you get together or never talk about it again," rei rolls her eyes.
"what?" you stop, looking at them.
"rei's right, although i'd prefer for you to finally get together."
"wait wait wait, what do you mean?"
"are you being for real right now? you two have clearly had a thing for each other this whole time!" rei says like it was obvious. "we've known it for years."
"go get your man!" hiyyih sighs, turning you by your shoulders and pushing you away this time.
you try not to dwell on the thought of your friends betting on your relationship with jungwon, and pretend you never heard a word come out of their mouths.
soon, the headmaster calls for everyone's attention.
"welcome students!" his voice echoes throughout the hall, the music quietening for his speech. "first and foremost, i want to thank this year's head girl and boy for organising such an event for us. give it up for kim y/n and yang jungwon!" he shouts, a spot light highlighting your two figures in the room. you quickly turn to look at jungwon, who looks back at you with a smile, as everyone claps loudly, some even whistling supportively.
"and with that, may the spring ball begin - with the spring dance, kicking off with the head boy and girl leading the first dance," professor si-hyuk ends his speech.
everyone cheers and makes way for you two on the dance floor, which magically raises up in the middle of the hall.
music begins to play as you face the head boy, who inches closer to you every second.
time slows as he places his hand on your hips, guiding your hand to his shoulders. all other noise is drowned out by the sound of your heart, pounding so hard it might come out your chest. you don't see anyone but yang jungwon.
and he's looking at you like he sees no one else but you either.
it's crazy, how you're here, dancing, in the arms of the person who you've hated since 1st year - who motivated you to work hard during all these years.
you think back to your first meeting with him.
you could imagine the sparkles in your eyes as you stare at everything in awe, still in disbelief.
last month, a weirdly-dressed person knocked at your front door, and told your parents that you were a witch.
of course, you hadn't believed her at first, until she pointed her wand at a decorative figurine and made it float upside down. you and your family had been absolutely floored and confused. how could something like that even happen?
last month, the weirdly-dressed lady described to you a world that sounded fictional, of magic and creatures you could never even imagine. she explained why you had all these weird happenings growing up, things that were simply unexplainable.
your world was turned upside down in a few moments, and now you were here, on a train, to a magical school.
of course, you were incredibly sad to be away from your family for the first time in your life, but you were assured that you still had many ways to connect with them. and so, you set off into a new world completely alone, but with a lot of excitement.
you walked around the compartments as the train set off, peering and saying hi to other students.
until, you bumped into a boy who had the prettiest eyes you've ever seen, and the cutest little dimple that had 11-year old you's heart melting.
"be careful and look where you're going," he says nonchalantly.
"i'm so sorry! i was just so excited - i mean, aren't you? could you ever believe magic exists? i won't until i try it for myself!" you ramble enthusiastically.
you trail off when you see him looking at you with a mix of pity and boredom.
"oh, so you're a muggle-born, huh?"
"what do you mean?" you ask confusedly.
"well, whatever you think, i'm not like you. i already know what you just learned, and i already know what you still have to learn," he shrugs, picking at his nails like he ha better things to do than talk to you. "sorry, i think you're going to struggle a little bit here," he simply says, and leaves you alone in the middle of the train corridor.
what the hell? you ask yourself.
snobby rich kids isn't something you thought you'd experience in the wizarding world, but i guess somethings are just universal, huh?
something about the way he looked at you; talked to you like you were below him though - it bugged you.
"i'm gonna struggle?" you ask yourself in disbelief. absolutely not, you didn't want him to be right. you'll make sure of it.
and so, you ran back to your own compartment and pulled out your books, making a resolution to study everything and make sure you knew all the content. you wanted to show whoever that kid is that he's wrong, that you're better than him.
and so, the rest of the long ride and even your first night was spent catching up on what you missed out on, making sure you were prepared for whatever this extraordinary world would throw at you.
and most especially, preparing for whatever trouble the boy, who's name you learned was yang jungwon would give you.
gradually, more people join the dance, but you're so entranced by the boy in your arms, you don't notice how he's whisked you away from the main dance floor.
now towards the side of the room, away from all attention, jungwon looks down at you with all the love in his eyes.
it's overwhelming, you can't escape your emotions anymore. you like jungwon, possibly even more. you feel like all these feelings are about to burst out of you, and jungwon's arms are the only thing keeping you together.
"y/n, i think you still owe me something," he whispered, his face dangerously close to yours.
"and what would that be?" you naturally retort, having developed the instinct to talk back when it came to him.
"don't play with me, please let me kiss you."
"i don't think so." you pause teasingly, trying not to giggle at his pout, his dimple coming out. "let me kiss you," you say, finally leaning in, sealing your lips.
it felt just like the one back in 5th year, but better. jungwon held you impossibly closer by the waist, as if fearing you would run away. but you won't, and you never will. because in his arms, you never felt as safe and comfortable in your own skin as you did then.
you finally part for air, but jungwon's eyes never strayed from your face.
"i lied earlier by the way, when i said you looked good." you raise your eyebrows at him questioningly, before he smiles cheekily at you. "you look like the stars that put me to sleep every night."
"i didn't know you were poetic like that," you laughed lightly, leaning your forehead on his chest. "you look like my boyfriend."
"that's because i am," he says pulling you in for another kiss.
you don't think you'll ever get tired of kissing him. it's an unforgettable moment, and an unforgettable night.
you never knew you were missing something until you met jungwon, and you think you can finally breathe with him next to you (and your friends passing riki 20 galleons each two tables away). 
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; author's corner! hii this was inspired by all the jily fics i've read over the years (whew i didn't even realise how long i've been reading fanfiction...) LMAO anyways may irls never find out this acc belongs to me bc my realistic self barfed at what i just wrote but my delulu self was kicking and giggling while editing but i hope you enjoyed!
; taglist @wonuslust @enhacatalog @makiswrld @forjungwons @yebin14 @lovelovelovebts @amanda-archives @beomgyusonlywife @bbinwrld@em-asian @enhamysunshines @ahnneyong @jungwonscafe bold couldn't be tagged!
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aryxchse · 8 months ago
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who did this to you? | percy jackson x daughter of hera! reader.
a / n : didn't wrote about my husband in a long time now
warnings : blood mentioning, passing out, dark-ish percy, cursing, enemies to lovers, book percy is my babe fr
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percy was never the guy who judged the book by it's cover.
he had every type of friends. clarisse, who was the daughter of ares, the second god he despised the most. annabeth, which was his father's arch nemesis athena's daughter. thalia, the girl he couldn't get along at the first but realised they were same in different fonts, which was the daughter of zeus. also the arch nemesis of his father.
he loved his friends deeply. he was loyal to them to death and he always believed that they weren't their parents. until he met you.
you were the daughter of.. well.. hera. ranking the first in his 'i-would've-killed-if-i-had-the-power.' list. and ares with a red marker under her.
the moment you felt his judgy and awkward aura around you, you decided that you should hate him. you tried to love him, which was easy, believe me. but you always thought he hated you too, so you get along with it.
percy jackson never hated you. he was just scared from you. scared from the way you sometimes did acted like your mother. and if you would've turned out like her some day.
but you never did. you were always the same gentle, sweet, caring and motherly girl. at least to others. percy jackson was just keeping up with your attitude, the attitude he created unknowingly.
until one day, you came back to argo ii from your quest with jason and annabeth, all bruised up. jason was carrying you on his back while annabeth held your hand tightly, tears perking in her eyes.
"percy, hazel, everyone! come here please!" annabeth shouted as jason put you down gently. you rested your back to some wood wall that you didn't recognised at the moment. annabeth still held your hand, and you smiled. blood running down from your lip. "annie, m' okay." you mumbled, squezzing the girls hand.
"don't talk love," annabeth caressed your hair as the others rushed up to the main deck. hazel rushed to your side, giving you some ambrosia.
"what happened?" you heard percy ask, voice weirdly shaking. you closed your eyes and the sun suddenly was gone with someone's shadow. "hey, y/n, look at me," someone cupped your face. you slowly opened your eyes and saw percy staring at you. he had that worried face you loved so much, but never saw directed to you until now.
"who did this to you?" he asked, also looking at annabeth and jason. "who did this to her, jason? annabeth?" he asked them. you heard jason sigh.
you heard some mumbles coming from jason before you fell asleep, too tired to keep staying up.
when you woke up, someone was holding your hand. it was annabeth, who smiled the moment she saw you woken up. you smiled back, warming up with her caring behavior. "hey annie."
"hey sweetie," she said, getting up from the chair and sitting next to you on the bed. "how are you feeling?"
"great," you answered. and you did feel great. you were all bandaged and the ambrosia you ate earlier gave you energy. "what happened after i passed out? what happened to the monster?"
annabeth had a grin on her face that you saw only in special occasions. shipping kinda occasions. "well, after jason told everything that happened to percy- you remember he's asking you who did it right?" she asked.
"yeah, yeah i do. the last thing i heard was jason mumbling," you explained and she nodded. "after percy finding out who did it, and you passing out at the moment, he uh.. destroyed the monster. yeah, i think that's the perfect word for it."
she giggle at the shocked expression on your face. "i don't think the monster will reborn even, that's how crazy he went."
annabeth caressed your hair, the gentle expression she usually had coming back. "aside from the jokes, he's really worried about you. you passing out did not helped him. i could send him here, if you want."
"that would be wonderful annie," you finally managed to whisper, smiling at the girl. she returned the smile and gave your hand one last squeeze before getting out from your quarter.
not so after, percy ran into your room and closed the door behind him. "thank gods," he whispered, rushing to you. he embaced you in a hug that could easly broke someone's ribs. but you only chuckled, hugging his neck. "hello shark boy, missed me?"
you meant this question to be a joke to wipe away the awkward sitiuation between you two, but he seemed to get this seriously. "so much." he whispered into your neck, caressing your hair gently. "thought i lost you for a sec, pretty."
the pretty was new. he called you many things, not mean ones of course, but many things. the pretty was new, and it wasn't meant to annoy you. this was new too.
"nah, you're not getting away from me that easy jackson." you chuckled, inhaling his scent. the first time you actually hugged him, and finally find out what was the fuss about his hugs. they were the best. the ones that made you feel safe from everything, even from your thoughts.
"i know, it was stupid of me. i should've guessed the y/n i know wouldn't leave that easly." he finally pulled away, quickly wiping his face with the back of his hand. was he crying?
"hey perce," you finally looked at his eyes. he never saw this soft expression on you, at least not looking at his way. at that moment, he was scared of what he could do to see you looking at him like that all the time.
"yeah?" he asked gently, holding your hands in his. you thought you should return the care, so you caressed his hands with your thumbs.
"thank you." you said. "for, in annabeth's words, destroying that monster. and for getting worried about me."
he smiled. a geniune smile you only saw giving to his friends. "anytime angel, would fight the gods for you." he said, looking at you with puppy eyes.
"i'm sorry for acting like the way i did," you said, ignoring the butterlies dancing in your stomach. "thought you hated me."
"hate you?" he shouted a bit, squeezing your hands. "i never hated you. i thought you hated me."
"i did!" you bluntly said, and that earned a chuckle from him. "because you judged me because of my mother!"
"no! i swear i didn't mean that to happen," he said quickly, sitting close to you. "i was just scared you'd be all.. mean like your mother. but i realised you weren't and i was so late to fix everything. you were already hating me."
you only sighed, and looked at your intertwined hands. it made you touch your foreheads, and he leaned to you gladly. "i was so scared i lost you before i even made it up." he whispered.
"don't worry, i'd haunt you." you laughed, and he laughed along with you.
you pulled away your one hand to caress his cheek, which he accepted the touch happily. his gaze suddenly flickered to your lips, and the next second he was leaning in.
"would you like to know another fact?" he said, grinning like a devil. you nervously smiled, thumb caressing his jawline. "what?"
"i wanted to kiss you for a sickingly long time now," he said quietly, leaning in until your nose touched. you prayed to every olympian that he wouldnt hear your heartbeat, beating crazy inside your ribs.
"yeah? i knew you had a thing for me," you teased, holding his chin in your fingers. he only continued grinning, his breath hitting your lips. "you were stupidly obvious about it."
"i don't give a single fuck," he breathed out before smashing his lips onto yours, eagerly kissing you. his hands cupped your face and you gripped his shirt.
the kiss felt like it was bound to happen. like it was a prophecy becoming true. you secretly knew this would happen eventually, because he indeed was stupidly obvious about his feelings. you always thought percy jackson hated you, but everytime you turned your head, he would be there. standing by your side.
you pulled away only to breath, lips still few inches away. "i had a thing for you too, if you couldn't tell." you chuckled. he let out a breathless laugh, annoyingly hot.
"yeah i figured it out," he said. then he finally looked away from your lips to stare deep in your eyes, grinning. "you're stuck with me now angel. prepare yourself to see me everytime, attached to you by the hip."
"when did i never?"
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dolicekiss · 4 months ago
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Cherry Tree
PAIRING: Johann Struensee x Princess!Reader
CONTENT WARNINGS: SMUT (18+ only, mdni) age gap (reader is nineteen, Johann is in his 30s as his age isn't specified in the movie), unprotected sex, body worshipping, oral (female receiving) fingering, slight food play, teasing, forbidden romance/affair, exhibitionism, praise kink, cold shoulder (reader is a sassy little princess), angst, fluff, johann is completely whipped for reader, just overall cute and sad shit because i bawled my eyes out watching a royal affair and johann deserves a happy ending.
SYNOPSIS: You were not fond of the new physician hired for your father, the king as the man led him astray, especially from your mother to brothels. So you always gave him the cold shoulder, not missing a chance to disrespect him but what you didn't know was the man was already attracted to you, stealing glances from you and finding you endearing everytime you insulted him.
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You watched your father, throwing a fit, drunk in the hallway of the palace while your mother watched, drowning further in the humiliation of being married to such a hopeless and destroyed man.
Alongside stood Johann Struensee, and two new faces you didn't deem important. You couldn't hold back the quip that settled like poison at your tongue when Johann had told your mother that they were merely having fun. Having fun while humiliating her in brothels.
Your fingers scratched against the parapet, watching it unfold.
“I don't think the queen is interested in what a mere doctor has got to say, Struensee.” Everyone's attention shifted to you. They all knew how bold and fierce of a princess you were, your mother's pride and joy. The kingdom’s rebellious little princess. Just at the age of nineteen, you'd already mastered the art of raw manipulation.
Knowing that docile little women were trampled underneath the foot of court men.
Struensee’s gaze found you standing at the parapet from above and he smiled, his wrinkles appearing. Then he nodded his head and went silent, disappearing along with the king somewhere. Your father didn't care much for you, since you were a girl. Producing an heir was the only thing that mattered and he'd already done that.
Relieved himself of his duties to indulge in alcohol and prostitutes.
Your mother sent you a look of sadness but also a nod of appreciation, leaving for her chambers. The night passed by like nothing while you stirred in bed, clouded by thoughts on how to get rid of Struensee.
He clung onto the king and that displeased you.
Tomorrow came by and you were prepared for the day, to roam around the halls of the palace but you found more solace in the massive gardens. Filled with flowers and all sorts of fruits. Dressed in lace and net, you headed for breakfast. Everyone else was already situated at the table, including the man you despised.
As you sat down on the chair, in front of Johann’s, you began your breakfast. The conversation happening at the table was of no interest to you but then your father, the king spoke up. Catching everyone's attention.
“Johann will be becoming a part of the court soon enough.” His tone cheerful, as if everyone was pleased with the idea as much as he was.
Your fingers tightened around the metallic fork, stabbing it into the egg. It was an act you wished you'd done to Johann instead of the egg — biting down the inside of your cheek. Your mother was a frail woman, she didn't like the idea of Johann joining court but she couldn't do much to oppose it.
You, on the other hand, smiled.
“Forgive me for my words, but the court is full of respectful and renowned people.” The sound of metallic utensils colliding against one another stalled. “Johann Struensee is only a doctor, he would do the court no good.”
Your father thought but laughed out, pointing his finger at you. Everyone else stared at the scene unfold as Johann also joined in the king to laugh along, fuelling the anger that boiled inside you like a damn volcano.
“What would a woman know about the court? Eat your breakfast, stupid girl.” You sucked in your cheek, glancing at your mother who looked at you with an apologetic look. There was a voice inside you telling you to raise the fork and stab Johann with it.
But with your poorly containerd rage, you stood up from the seat. “I am sated.”
You left the room but not before throwing a vicious glare at the man with dirty blonde hair, who stared back at you. With a smug of victory on his face. Upon entering your room, you tossed your gloves off and kicked your shoes off.
Angered and irritated.
Hating the way your breasts felt plush against the tight corset. Having such feminine thighs or a cunt, which changed the way people saw perceived you as. Your word would have mattered if you were a man, if you possessed a fucking cock and not the parts which made you a woman.
There was a knock on the door and when you allowed the person in, it was your maiden.
“Doctor Johan Struensee wishes to enter your chambers, Princess.”
You wanted to tell her to forbade him. To abandon him from entering your chambers ever but you couldn't let him win by expressing your anger so you nodded. When you felt his presence, you turned around on your sock cladded feet and smiled at him.
“To what do I owe this pleasure, Struensee?”
Your tone venomous and sarcastic.
Johann returned your smile, knowing very well it was fake. He didn't like how your father had spoken to you as he was a firm believer of women deserving the same respect as men did. Though voicing out such daring opinions could lead to his execution. Even if you had expressed your distaste against him, seemingly believing he was a bad influence to the king, he still thought you deserved respect.
“I apologize.” He said, firmly and you blinked on confusion.
Why was he apologising?
Your smile stayed tight. “And why are you apologizing, Doctor?”
He took a step closer, shrinking the space between the two of you. You didn't know if it was your mind playing games with you or if Struensee’s gaze had lingered to the pink hue of your lips. “I'm aware of the crown Princess’ distaste towards the King’s friends, specifically me.”
You crossed your arms over your chest and oblivious to you, Johann inhaled a sharp breath when your plush breasts nearly spilled out from beneath your tight corset. Pinkish color decorating the skin. You turned around from him, walking towards the books decorating your wooden shelf.
“Then you should not be here, Doctor. I'm very against the idea of you being on court, knowing you're the one who influences the royal highness to visit brothels.” Your voice was sweet but it was laced with a poisonous warning. Your delicate fingers ran across the books and Johann closed his eyes.
Mind taking him to a different place, imagining just how your fingers would look entangled with his.
This was immoral and a crime.
You were the Princess and he was a mere Doctor, twice your age too. There was no way you'd give in to him or even consider him attractive. He was here to apologize, he reminded himself. To be reprimanded by you for laughing along with the King at his humiliation of you.
Instead you were enticing him unknowingly.
“A man cannot be influenced by anyone if he swears loyalty to his woman.” Johann’s words made a bitter frown to cease your features. Even before his arrival, you'd known of your father's indulgence in women outside his marriage. In a way you only wanted to blame someone and seeing how Johann only increased your father’s visits to the disgusting brothels, he was the perfect vessel.
You scoffed. “I don't understand. A cunt is a cunt, no matter who it is attached to.”
His eyes widened at your choice of bold and immoral words. He knew you possessed ferocity and boldnesd, both perfect to rule over the kingdom but he didn't know you had such a filthy tongue too.
Johann was impressed and in complete awe.
He suppressed a smile. “How much power and resistance can it take to stay loyal to a woman? You men have and will always find ways to disappoint us women throughout the history.”
You hated the idea of serving under a man, obeying his every command and dealing with the non stop disrespect. You wanted to be queen, to fix the laws set by your ancestors and to rid people of this delusion under the pretense of religion.
Johann found himself more attracted to you now, seeing you in a different light. Before you were only a little girl who threw fits because she disliked him but now, you were a woman with big dreams and strength.
“I'm impressed, Princess.”
You looked at him, with a fake smile. “I wish I could say the same for you, Doctor Stuensee.”
A chuckle nearly slipped him. He soon excused himself from your company, leaving your chambers. The whole night he thought about you, how delicate you were but also strong and resilient. Having lived between women who were docile, weak and often easily silenced, you were a breath of fresh air for him.
— ♡ —
Your maidens had dressed you up. In frills and lace. The stupid, endless routine boring you to death. Denmark was a beautiful country and you wished to explore it yet your gender did not allow you to. You skipped breakfast, not wanting to face your father or Johann, aftwe the humiliation he'd caused you and headed for the garden. You grasped onto your book and dismissed your maidens for a moment of solitude.
Away from all the bickering and banter of royalty.
You sat on a cemented bench, parting open your book to read it. The birds sung in beautiful, minor chirps and the sound of the water droplets falling from the tip of leaves was comforting to the ears. Next to you was a cherry tree and you reached out for it, plucking a fresh cherry and plopping it into your mouth.
Almost moaning at the taste of how delicious ripe and fresh fruits were.
Continuing to read your book and enjoy the fruit, you soon lifted your gaze up to scan the area and found Struensee situated on a bench far away from yours, eyes fixed on you. You were slightly taken aback but covered it up nonetheless.
He too had a book in his hand and you squinted your eyes, to find the same book you were reading in your hand.
The fact that you both shared the same taste slightly bothered you, but you shifted your attention back to the ink stamped into the biege paper.
Your curiosity though, would get the best of you from time to time as you'd raise your gaze and steal glances from him. Only to find that he did the same, raising his eyes from the contents of his book to admire you. Johann had always found you beautiful, if not endearing.
He saw it that you cared about your people, that you wanted to do more than just parade around in beautiful dresses with maidens tending to all your needs. Born a girl was a curse, you saw it that way always and Johann was aware.
You plucked out a cherry and instead of plopping it into your mouth, you bit on it and traced it along your lower lip. Its juices leaving a red trail over your rosette lips. Johann watched you with a penetrative gaze, his adams apple bobbing up and down. Catching onto the little act done under lost thought.
The juice from the cherry dropped down your chin, leaving a messy trail and you giggled at the ticklish coldness of it. Not paying any mind to the man that was drinking you in like cherry wine.
Before you could delve deeper into what your book had to offer, Johann stood up to his feet and made his way towards you. You stared at him for a moment before finally scooting away.
An invitation for him to sit next to you.
“I did not know you were a fan of such books, Princess.” He commented and you let out a soft laugh, for the first time dropping your cold demeanor. The sugar from the cherries had definitely affected you.
You licked your lips, wetting the cherry tainted skin. “Love stories are a foreign concept for someone like me. It is best to read about them and forget.”
“You don't believe in love?”
You shook your head, teeth digging into your lower lip. He caught onto that and his fingers curved around the bench, tightening. There was so much self control he could possess after all. Being a man didn't help either.
“I'm nineteen. They will soon marry me off to someone I don't even know and I will face the same fate as my mother did.” Your tone was soft, different from your usual cold tone, sadness lingering underneath it. Johann understood you, but didn't feel you as he could never feel what a woman felt.
Johann’s eyes dropped to your hand and he almost held it. He stayed silence, watching as you reached for a cherry and bit into it, the juices squirting and making a mess over your lips. He couldn't accuse you of purposely enticing him but fuck, you were such a gorgeous girl.
He wanted nothing more than to claim you as his.
“Would you like some, Doctor Struensee?”
Instead of answering you, his hand moved on its own accord. Reaching for your small delicate wrist, fingers trapping it. He brought it to his lips and your breathing became uneven the moment your fingertips coming in contact with his lips. Johann’s gaze swallowed yours, while taking a the cherry into his mouth. You flinched when your fingers felt the inside of his mouth, teeth running over your skin.
Then he let you go.
A turmoil had been caused inside you.
He watched as your plump chest rose up and down, noticing the attraction swirling like wildfire in your darkened eyes. Johann knew he was playing with fire. You could tell anyone, get him executed for daring to hold your wrist.
But instead you stood up and left.
Running out of the garden, leaving behind your book and georgette scarf.
— ♡ —
You were in the garden again, late at night.
This time searching for your book by the bench, sneakily hoping no one would catch you. The bustling of bushes caught you off guard and when you stood up straight, it was Johann.
In his hand was your book and georgette scarf.
“Looking for this, Princess?”
You blinked your eyes. “Yes, I must've dropped it.”
You reached over to take a hold of your book but he pulled it back, leaving you confused. You blinked and reached for it once more, this time around more firmly but Johann only smiled, taking a step back from you.
Johann found you completely captivating. There was not an ounce of makeup on your face, skin bare. Your silky night gown exposed your shoulders and reached your ankles, covering most of you. No longer were your breasts plumped up and Johann wanted to unveil them. Expose them to his gaze, to his touch.
Your hair cascaded down in beautiful waves and he sharply took in a breath.
“Doctor, I am in no mood to be playing games. Hand me my book right this very instant.” You took a step forward but because it was dark, your foot rolled over a branch and you lost balance — finding yourself right in his arms.
Johann held you, staring down at you, lips shuddering from the proximity. You swallowed tightly and Johann noticed that, your gaze following his lips. An urge to crash your lips against his took over you and you'd almost leaned in but then you pulled back from him, fixing your hair.
You stared at him.
He returned it.
And then the curtain of patience cand crashing down. He closed the distance between the two of you, crashing his lips against yours. The kiss desperate and impatient. Your hands found his nape while he feverishly consumed you.
You didn't care for the customs of your family anymore. Ever since you'd left the garden, you thought about Johann. This time not to get rid of him but to meet him, to satiate this hunger of yours that he had awakened within you.
His hands flew to your silky night dress, aggressively slipping it off you meanwhile your fingers moved skilfully underneath his loose white shirt, trying to slip it off him. Johann held your face with both his hands, tongue battling with yours. He'd claimed you like no one had.
The fact that you two were indulging in such a daring act out in the open where anyone could see you, it only added more to the thrill of it all. Johann broke the kiss, pulling apart but before he could say something, you already pushed against him. Occupying his lips again.
You were inexperienced but well aware of what happened between a man and a woman.
Teeth colliding with teeth, tongue producing saliva and lips becoming wet, the kissing sounds were drowned out by the sound of the river. Mother nature coming in hand to help you both conceal the debauchery perfomed in its grasp.
Your fingers tugged at his roots, your body going flaccid against his. He could feel your breasts and he groaned in your mouth at the contact. His own shirt was discarded and he laid you down on the grass, holding your body gently.
You finally tore from him, in dire need of oxygen.
“This is wrong.” You whispered, staring into his eyes. “So wrong.”
Johann nodded and went back to kissing you, pulling onto your lower lip with this sharp teeth. You could feel his hands dropping down, fondling with your breasts. One hand fitting over the two — thumbs flicking the hardened peaks back and forth. Your back arched off the grass, feeling its pointy tips prickle your skin a little.
Johann leaned down, face hovering right over your breasts. He took one nipple into his mouth and to conceal your sounds, you forced your palms over your mouth while staring down at him. Feeling his wet tongue lap at your nipple, as he sucked on it and nipped around it.
“Doctor, please.” You pleaded, oblivious to what you were begging for.
He pulled back with a pop and stared at you, his darkened pupils reflecting your desire for him. “Call me Johann. I need you to say my name when I'm buried inside you, my beautiful Princess.”
You nodded your head. Heat pooling into your stomach at how hoarse voice, the embers delivered right to your moist cunt. Your hands reached for his face, wrapping around the ridges of it, fingers flicking his strands back to their old position.
“You're so pretty.” You complemented him, running your tongue over your swollen and red lips. Johann nearly lost all restraint, dropping his face between your thighs. Brawny hands slithering over your them as he buried his face deep into your cunt.
“Princess, remember when you said a cunt is a cunt no matter who is it attached to.” Johann recalled your words and you panted in anticipation. “I think it matters, Crown Princess as I have tried to fuck many cunts to satiate my hunger for yours.”
Your lips fell apart a little, a soft gasp of shock leaving you. Before you could register his words and how he was fucking other women to fulfill his desire for you, Johann had commited to bringing you otherworldly pleasure. His tongue running up and down your virgin pussy, catching a taste he knew he'd become obsessed with.
Your hips wormed on the grass, teeth sinking into the side of your hand to prevent you from screaming. Chills dressed you up under the dark, sinful night as Johann continued devouring your cunt. Flicking your swollen clit with his licentious tongue, then circling it around.
Your one hand snuck into his hair, pulling and gripping while the other bled from all the harsh biting.
“Johann. Johann, I feel weird. It all feels weird.” You cried out his name like a mantra, in soft little whimpers and barely audible whispers. If anyone were to find out about this, you'd both be done for. You'd be exiled and Johann would face a fate worse than yours.
Yet he was risking it.
Just to get a taste of you.
Butterflies flooded in your stomach when your foggy mind registered that.
Your abdomen was being pinched and nipped at from all the overwhelming pleasure but more was yet to come when Johann slid his fingers inside your virgin hole. One finger and you were gasping like he'd slid his cock inside you.
He looked up at you, the moonlight illuminating his beautiful features and the gloss over his lips told you it was your arousal that had branded him. “My doll, just let it go. Don't hold it in, okay?”
You nodded.
He began to finger you. Curving the digits in a search for that spot of yours and when he earned himself a cry straight from your throat, Johann realized he found his crown princess’ sensitive spot.
So he hit it, repeatedly, feeling the jelly spot with his fingertips. All while you released muffled whimpers of desire, abdomen tightening and reflexing. Your hands desperately cupped his face, a plea of silence in your blurry vision.
“Kiss me, please. Need you to kiss me, Johann.” How could he deny you when you were asking with such politeness, staring back at him with blown out pupils and a sweaty face. Flesh raw and flustered.
He crawled up and captured your lips in a tight lock, swallowing all your whimpers when you came all over his fingers. His moving fingers coaxing more sounds out of you, only to drink them like a thirsty man who'd found an oasis in the middle of a desert.
“Princess, are you with me?” He saw how out of breath you were, staring above at the sky which sparkled with stars.
“Y-Yes.” You responded, still in a daze from the raw pleasure that surged through you like waves of electric.
He pressed a chaste kiss to your forehead, arms circling around you. “Do you wish to go further, Doll? Or shall I st—”
“Doctor you talk a lot.” You said, gaze finally focusing on him. Your bare breasts heaved up and down, in attempts to inhale as much oxygen as you could. “Fuck me before I change my mind. Before I condemn you to the pits of hell for laying a hand on me. Before I forget how good you make me feel.”
Johann pressed his tongue against the inside of his mouth, forming a bulge on his cheek and chuckled. He pried your legs open, revealing your glossy pussy to him.
“Your wish id my command, Princess.” Johann’s comment made you let out a subtle smile. Johann maneuvered his cock into your hole, feeling it tight just when he slipped in his thick cockhead.
Your thighs reflxed, hole clenching.
“At ease, Princess. You have to let me in.” He whispered, arms wrapped around you. He held you, slightly lifying you up from the grass as he slid into you slowly. Inch by inch. Your tears spilled at the stretch and how much it burned — feeling like it'll incinerate you.
You were still gripping him tightly, not allowing him in and the man grunted at how tight you were. It was obvious you were a virgin and he'd taken that virtue from you, feeling guilt spread in his heart but something dark also followed along.
He'd taken you.
Claimed you.
“It hurts, Johann.” You whimpered out, tears profusely decorating your face like fallen pearls. The man nodded his head, acknowledging your pain. He placed kisses all over your face, distracting you and the moment he felt you loosen up, he pushed all the way in.
Your body jerked. Arms tossing themselves around him. Clinging to him tightly as you felt him stretch your walls past their limits. Is this what it felt like sleeping with a man? Johann’s cock was thick and he did not lack when it came to length. It was too much to bear but your wanton helped you deal with the pain.
“See, all the way in. Are you okay, my doll?”
“Yes. Just continue, please.” Johann obliged and pulled out, only to forcefully thrust back inside. Your arousal helped slick his cock as he slid in and out of you. His growl was low and slipped right into your ear.
Johann held you while he fucked you, thrusting in you like he was claiming you. He loved how tight you were and as the cloud revealed the moon, he witnessed the blood of your virtue in the form of a ring around his length.
“You're like the moon itself. So beautiful and so heavenly, Princess.” Johann grunted, his hips stuttering into yours. His hands roaming down to caress each curve, each beauty spot and each part of you. You were blessed by the gods in such immense quantity, it was difficult to ignore.
Johann saw a goddess laid before him, not a human. A powerful beauty who had him on his knees by just mere stolen glances. You felt it too, the way he caressed you. Held you and felt your skin against his own. Appreciation oozing out of his actions.
As he delivered solid strokes into your cunt, driving himself deeper and abusing your sensitive area. “My pretty fucking Princess. If you'd asked me once, just once that you wanted this. I would've followed you myself into your chambers, would've taken you right then and there.”
Your body twitched. Cunt throbbing and walls gripping him tightly at his words. The idea of him taking you by force was supposed to be immoral and repulsive but maybe that is what you liked, enjoyed. Found delight in. Johann slipping into your chambers and taking you while you slept.
The idea didn't vex you, as it should have.
“Johann—my god. Just, keep going. Please keep fucking me.”
He couldn't explain how much he loved it when you moaned out his name. Your voice like a siren song, calling him to his doom and Johann would willingly follow you to the depths of the roaring sea.
Just the way your fingernails dug into his back, searing down and leaving him bloodied. You were a fucking feline, in heat. Leaving him covered in marks like some wild animal.
If anyone were to find out that their dear Princess was this disgusting, they would banish you forever. Practicing such debauchery and sinfulness.
The same feeling from before greeted you, but this time more intense, more strong and all consuming. Your body surged forward into the grass as Johann fucked himself into you deeper, to the point you could feel the man in your womb. Oh how fucking good it felt. To have him caress such deep, intimate parts of yours.
“Johann, Johann— It's happening again.” You sobbed, tightly holding him. Arms and legs both wrapped around him. He buried his face in your neck and left kisses all over, while encouraging out your release. You descended to heaven for a moment, feeling your soul leave your body when you came over his cock.
Johann felt you tremor in his hand, holding you down as you sobbed and tightened around him. The man hissed at how tightly you were sucking him in and after a few snaps of his hips, he too came. His seed filling you to the brim, staining your virgin walls with its thickness.
Your sobs died out, turning into little sniffles as your sensitivity heightened. Johann laid on top of you, but his weight was supported by his elbows. He dragged his face out of your throat and looked at you. Seeing how fucked out you were.
Face sweaty and saturated, swollen lips parted and chest rising up and down. You slowly flit your across over him and hugged him tightly, hiding your face in his chest. There was no regret, no guilt. You would do it again in a heartbeat.
“Princess?”
“I'm fine, Johann.” You responded, kissing his shoulder, dragging your nails down his spine to leave more marks.
The man pulled out of you soon causing you to gasp. He grabbed your night dress from the grass and pulled it down your head, fixing your frame. His big hands pushed back the hair from your face and his lips pressed over your nose, affectionately.
You couldn't stand up but when you did, you grabbed your book. Johann attempted to wrap the georgette scarf around you but you pushed at it, shaking your head. Getting on your tippy toes, you brushed your lips over the shell of his ear.
“Keep it. Keep it so when you recall back to claiming the Crown Princess’ virgin cunt, you use this to fuck your hand.” Your voice was drowsy, a sultry whisper and then you pulled back, disappearing into the bushes.
Leaving Johann Struensee completely obsessed and in love. He couldn't wait to enter your chambers.
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alexa-fika · 6 months ago
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ALRIGHT! ALRIGHT! Last request before I sleep
Here me out shanks with a 13 year old daughter (who has his iconic red hair) reader who absolutely despised him because he's the reason why her town got attack (Shanks keeps flirting with her mother unknowingly he accidentally made her into an outcast)
Reader who's snarky, a bit rude but polite and well mannered (unlike shanks)
Reader who's always reading and very elegant royalty like but not spoiled and very serious all the time (unlike shanks)
Reader who's secretly insecure and scared that she's always gonna be in her father shadow
Reader who is always in the whitebeard pirates (THOUGHT THIS WASN'T A WHITEBEARD REQUEST BUT I MADE IT ANYWAYS?)
Reader who always dye their hair into black
Reader who bonds with ace because of their daddy issues 🥰
That's it. That's the tweet
Roots ( Ace x f!teen!reader)
A/N here we go, I dont feel with this one, I feel like I missed the whole vibe you were trying to get when you submitted the regret, I spend a week just staring at the screen trying to think of how to approach it and I can’t say I choose the right one
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Dokucha frowns as the book on her hands is ripped away from her hands, only to let a small smile as she recognizes the candy cane-patterned bracelet
"Ace, you're back," she stated, looking up at the grinning man squatting on the railing
"I'm back," he responds, jumping down from the railing and bringing the girl into a side hug
"What have you been up to today?"
"I am actually taking a small breather before I continue training; I believe it's Haruta's turn for a session," she stated gingerly, clenching her hands in a lower position
"Turn?"He furrowed his brows at her words and the implications behind them
"Dokucha, how many sessions have you done?"
She bites at her lip, shifting her gaze away from his
"This would be the seventh," she muttered
"I told you to stop pushing it, you're only thirteen dokucha, it's okay to train, but this is too much," he scolded
"Is this about Shanks?" he muttered, kneeling down to her level
"I don't want to fall behind."
" I know you don't, but are you just going to waste your life trying to catch him?
Isn't that what you don't want to do? To live your whole life trying to surpass your old man?"
"I can see it in their eyes, Ace, every time we go on a mission; all they can see is him, they don't think of me as Dokucha, they just see his daughter," she murmured, teary eyes flickering back to the man
"Then let them. They have no place in your life, so why would you care what a bunch of strangers think?" he asked
He frowns at the small unconvinced hum that leaves the teen at his words only to bounce back as an idea comes to mind
“ Hey, I found a cool place on my way back; it’s only a few minutes on the Striker; wanna check it out?”
“But Haruta is expecting me…”
“Don’t worry about that; you said you still have some time, right?”
“I suppose so, b-
“Great, you head to the Striker; I will catch back up in a second; need to get something before we head out,” he said, running off
“W- Ace! I din- and he’s gone” she mutters at the retreating form of the commander, taking a glance down at the striker that had been tied to the Moby Dick
“I guess no harm in a small ride.”
-
“How did you find this place?” she muttered
The two found themselves sitting on the Striker, their leaves soaking in crystal clear water as they watched all the fish swim around them, curious about the two visitors
“I visited this island before on one of my missions.”
“Hm”
"Listen, Dokucha, I have told you about my father, yeah?”
“Yes, you did.”
“The reason why I'm so pushy on stopping what you’re doing is because I made the same mistake, and it cost me over 15 years of my life” he started, noticing how his words had finally gotten the girl’s attention
“ I spent all that time trying to follow my father’s legacy, to surpass him. To become the pirate king, to Defeat whitebeard. All the while, it just ate me inside; I was blindsided and led by my anger toward him for all those years. I missed many opportunities to enjoy, to have a carefree childhood just to accomplish that goal”
“How did you…why…”
“Why I stopped?”
“Yes”
“I found pops.”
“ I thought your goal was to take him down to prove yourself?” She asked now facing his way as her legs Straddled the Striker giving him her full attention, loookimg up at him in confusion
“It was; I spent the next few days going after him even after he took me into the moby; every day, I would try.”
“I refuse to believe that” she scoffed with an amused laugh
“I'm serious!
Tried over a hundred times, and every time, I would end up with either a bloody nose or thrown into the sea.”
She covers her mouth as she lets out a muffled laugh at the thought of a grumpy, drenched Ace
“A-Anyway, after that, Marco and later Pops talked with me; it made me realize how useless it was to try to take Pops down and follow after someone else’s dream.”
“Din’t you feel disappointed?”
“Quite the opposite, I felt free for the first time, felt free to make choices based on what I wanted and not to surpass my father; it’s led me to where I am now, and it was the best realization I made in my life.”
“…”
“Keep it in mind, okay? Let’s head back for now,” he said, pushing himself up, extending a hand to the girl as he prepped the Striker
“How do you think I should start?”
“Start what?” He questions, manauvering the Striker through the waves, slowing down as he puts his attention on her
“Letting go”
“Maybe you should start with this,” he said, flicking their head
“Jerk, what was the reason for that?”
“Stop trying to change yourself; your roots are coming out; why don’t you let them grow?”
“Ah!” She exclaims covering her head at his comment, missing the way he sighed and shook his head only to come back to her senses as a weight was placed on her head
“You should be proud of yourself, the way you look, the way you are; at the end of the day, it’s yours, not his; now might be the best time
She looks up at the ravenette questioningly, his iconic hat now missing from his head and gingerly placed on hers
“What do you mean?”
He simply gestures to the new vessel now anchored next to the Moby Dick
“What is he doing here.”
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Thoughts?
Taglist:
@Imaginarydreams
@amethystviolin
@h0n3y-l3m0n05
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iznyangwoni · 4 months ago
Text
EASY TO LOVE | chapter twenty !
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“How you feeling?” Jungwon holds your waist from behind, resting his head on the crook of your neck. You just finished helping the dance team with their outfits that you made. To be honest, you’re excited, and finally proud of yourself for making something for everyone to see. “I’m feeling great, actually.”
You feel Jungwon smile before giving your neck a kiss, you’d be lying if you said that everything was going well between the two of you. Well, at least partly. You met his mom, who loves you to death, she even helped you with the festival! And he also met your mother and brother, which was a bit awkard, since you never really introduced anyone to your family, and Yeonjun can be pretty protective of you when he wants to.
You turn around to look at Jungwon in the eyes, his shining dark eyes completely on you, his hands on your hips. “Have you heard from her?” You ask him, referring to minji. You blocked her a long time ago, so even it you wanted to, you wouldn’t know. Jungwon shakes his head to say no, he knows how anxious you’ve been about all of this, the fear of minji spilling your secret, or even worse, leaking that video, was enough to not make you sleep at night.
“I told you already, she moved to Canada with her aunt. Just focus on the festival.” You purse your lips and he doesnt think twice before giving you a quick peck. “Y/n.. you did something great today, dont let your fears stop you from enjoying this moment, okay?” His words make you smile, last night you were both arguing about some petty and useless thing, and now he’s acting like this.
You wrap your hands around his neck, you’re glad everyone else is either on the stage or outside waiting for the festival to begin. “Give me a kiss.” you say and he immediately lowers his head down to reach your height. “don’t need to tell me twice.”
That said, his lips meet yours gently. You’ve learnt to love kissing, you didn’t despise it before, but you definitely didn’t like it as much as you do now. Jungwon lips are always so soft, so gentle and kind, they follow yours so well and make your heart beat so much you always feel like its going to explode or get out of your chest. Still, you dont really have much time, so he breaks the kiss smoothly.
“Let’s go back to our friends. You don’t want to miss your show, do you?” You giggle at his words, taking his hand and starting to walk outside, where your group is waiting for you. These last few days, even Sunghoon and Jungwon became somewhat friends, and you couldn’t be happier about it. “it’s not my show, really.”
“To me, everything is about you.”
prev | masterlist
TAGLIST @unhakki @firstclassjaylee @en-verse @mxxninthesky @onlyhyunjin @heeseungmyman @jiamini @yoonzns @wonswondrland @50-husbands @leaderwonim @aloloveswonie @f3rraribabez @jwonistic @ribbioniki @kyanmeai @ilovejungwonandhaechan @nat123c @yjwsgf @gyuvision @realrintaro @glxzillx @qettalos @rairaiblog @sakanelli-afc @nodiotter @haohaoshoe @vixensss @terryfiedgyu
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dreaisgrayte · 5 months ago
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I JUST BINGE READ ALL OF YOUR WORKS. YOU HAVE ME SCREAMING AND CRYING. The amount of detail that you put into them is MWAH the freakin chefs kiss 😘 you have been promoted to my #1, please never stop what you're doing ❤️❤️❤️
on another note, would you mind if I requested a scenario with Gojo? Maybe something about fem!y/n being from a high ranking rival clan, who the Gojo clan has despised for their entire existence. Maybe y/n has always had a crush on satoru ever since they first saw each other as kids, but since they were raised to hate each other it never went any further than a small lil crush. but now they're adults and both powerful sorcerers, her feelings kind of just pop back up out of nowhere and satoru finds it amusing how even after all this time and the things that their clans told them about each other that she would still have her little puppy crush on him. Maybe it could be like a she fell first and he fell harder scenario? i'm a slut for those oh my gosh
thank you so much!!!!
That's so so so sweet of you! Honestly, got me giggling and kicking my feet. Careful, I will propose, istg. This... turned into a monster while writing it. I came up with a silly little plan and a silly little idea to incorporate into your request and then this monstrosity was born. If I wasn't told to stop... I might've never stopped writing on this. I L O V E D this idea. Friends to lovers/1 fell first then the other fell harder I EAT UP EVERY TIME. So, here's what my whore brain wrote <3 love you and I hope you enjoy!
warnings: NSFW, MDNI, Gojo harasses the women he's actually into (he forgets how to flirt so just ends up bullying them), teasing, flirting, kissing, cowgirl, missionary, raw sex, a lot of touching, feelings...so many feelings
word count: 6.1k
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The Crave | Satoru Gojo x fem!reader
“Are you sure they’ll be there? I don’t want their son to look at our precious daughter.” Your mother holds you closely to her legs, clicking her tongue in annoyance when the maid nods her head. “Unbelievable. You hear that? Do they think they can parade that freak of nature around Japan? Well, they’ll have to see our daughter as well. She’s got the normal amount of eyes and isn’t staring at everyone with those ugly blue ones.” Her tone is harsh and for a six-year-old you, it’s hard to understand why she’s so angry. You also doubted that the young boy had six eyes.
Your father walks into the room, straightening his tie with a stern look on his features. “As long as they keep him away from her, everything will be fine.”
But as you were brought into the party, still close to your mother – you saw nothing but a boy with snow white hair and brilliant blue eyes. Sure the way he glared at you was slightly off-putting, but he was just a boy. He was alone in the room, but everyone seemed to be talking about him. Even your mother shamed him behind a gloved hand. 
Your heart aches. What did he do that warranted such disgust for simply being alive? The Gojo clan and your clan had been at odds since the very conception of both. They bred powerful sorcerors for fame, gain, and wealth. He was yet another product of selfish desire, born into a role and body he didn’t ask for. His life ahead would be filled with always the underline of being strong. Somehow; being uniquely gifted gave him the responsibility to be used like a tool. You knew your fate wasn’t far behind his.
Though, his eyes sparkled like he knew some deeply funny thing about the world. That – even though his destiny was surely to be used up by his clan – there were still things to be enjoyed in the world. It made your…stomach hurt. Both a swirling breeze of cool and a stifling wave of heat. Boiled and frozen, pumping whatever this feeling was straight into your tiny brain. 
That was the first time you ever saw Satoru Gojo, and you’d soon come to realize around the age of 10 that you had developed an infatuation with him. Children surrounded you, chattering about how you and Satoru were going to get married when you were older. Of course, you blushed and stayed quiet – which in hindsight wasn’t the best idea since the gaggle of children went screaming at Satoru about how you wanted to marry him. A less-than-ideal situation because those sapphire eyes tracked you down amongst the crowd and 10-year-old Satoru smirked. You were utterly done for.
Thinking back on the encounters you’d had with Satoru Gojo, you were glad your family hated him. It gave you an excuse to hide behind that fact because still – in your 20s – his face would appear in the back of your mind. You’d heard things about the miraculous powerful sorcerer he’d become from your boss at the special unit for special grade sorcerors. Your mother called you about 30 times just today to remind you Satoru wasn’t the strongest, you were. The Gojo clan was sneaky, they didn’t care about anyone else except for their gain. Your parents had raised you to be wary of anything the Gojo clan did, one misstep, and suddenly you’d be shipped off to the States. 
It was a mix inside your stomach. The Gojos were not to be trusted and you most definitely were not allowed to interact with their heir. So when your boss comes waltzing up to you with a wide smile on her face, you know that rule is about to be broken. “YN, I’ve been looking for you everywhere,” Her laugh comes off rushed. Your boss knew about the tensions between the rivaling clans, working with special grade sorcerors required her to do so. Then why? Why the hell did she pass over a report with that stupid fucker’s face on it? “There’s a powerful curse roaming around Shibuya that needs the attention of,” she pauses, scrunching her face in thought. 
You sigh, the annoyance in your body pooling in your joints. “Two extremely powerful sorcerors?” You offer, the fakest smile known to mankind presenting itself on your lips.
Nevertheless, she lights up and hits her fist on the flat of her palm. “Exactly! See, this is why we have you on the team!” She exclaims with a little too much vigor for your taste. 
You watch her for a moment, noticing the way her long blue hair bounces around – almost like they were cheering you on as well. “Right…” You drag out the word, glancing at the file folder in your hand. “Why can’t Gojo handle it by himself then?” Her excitement seemingly drains from her face. You take note immediately. “Boss, how powerful is this damn thing?”
༘⋆✿
Meanwhile, Satoru had the same look on his face – annoyance. He understood having two special graders go on this mission would ultimately be the best option, but you? What sort of sick play of the fates was this? You were always so, he groans running a hand down his face, perfect. Your reputation, your battle tactics, hell even your coworkers thought you were the best. That’s insane. What kind of person even has all of their coworkers think the best of them?
He tosses your folder to the side of his desk, wanting to bang his forehead on the surface of the hardwood just to make sure he is seeing things clearly. The higher-ups were always comparing him to you, making sure he never fell behind in anything. Your clan was just a bunch of prissy stuck-up snobs… but then again… so was his. 
It’s useless, he was stuck going on this mission with you because no matter how powerful he was, he would never have power over himself. He reaches for your folder again, flipping it open. Along with the neverending list of your accolades and magnificent achievements, was a picture of you paperclipped to the stack of paper. A few beats of silence pass as Satoru stares at your face. 
After a few more minutes he grunts and shuts the folder again. He focuses on pulling the black cloth back over his eyes. The curse would be a piece of cake, especially with both of you on the mission. That’s not what he was worried about per se. The tricky part was how unbelievably pretty you had gotten to be and how there was a growing ache in the pit of his stomach. Fuck, this was going to be a shitshow. Then again, he couldn’t help but wonder – with a growing smirk on his face – if you still had that puppy dog crush on him.
༘⋆✿
“Yes, right this way ma’am.” A blonde man guides you toward Satoru’s office. He’s in an interesting outfit, not the usual sorcerer apparel. His tie is black and white forming an interesting pattern. His calm blue dress shirt is tucked into a pair of beige slacks. He’s very handsome and also looks very tired. Probably from dealing with all of Satoru’s bullshit if you had to guess. 
He stops in front of a door and you almost don’t catch how his body deflates quickly with a tiny sigh before he’s back to normal. “Before I go in, please just call me YN.” Your body moves on its own, planting a hand on his rather muscular shoulder. 
He attempts a smile, but it falters almost as soon as the corners of his mouth reach their peak. “Call me Nanami, Nanami Kento.” He extends a hand and you gratefully shake it. He seems nice. Then, he opens the door and leaning up against a desk is none other than Satoru. 
Satoru is in uniform and you’ll be damned, he looks too good in it. How can someone that lanky pull off a baggy uniform? His fluffy white hair spikes out in a messy ‘I woke up looking this good’ way. Your heart – against every inch of your being, is thumping wildly in your chest. You should’ve double-checked his file to conclude he doesn’t have six ears. What if he can hear how erratic your pulse is? His azure gaze is locked in on the man beside you. “Thank you, Nanami,” Satoru smiles, but it doesn’t reach his eyes. You hear a grunt beside you and then Nanami starts walking down the hall. You watch him leave, wishing he could’ve stayed longer. You hear a loud cough from inside the room. Furrowing your brows you turn your gaze to Satoru, who looks irritated. “I thought you came to spend time with me YN, yet here you are not even paying any attention to me.” He complains, standing up. 
You press your lips into a thin line. “We’re not here for a playdate, we have business to do.” You reply with a lash of venom in your cool tone. Satoru glances off to the side with an airy laugh and smirk. What was he laughing about? You were growing more frustrated with every second. 
“Mmm, playdates remind me of when we were children.” He’s still looking off to the side like he’s watching a memory play out that only he can see. His gaze is back to you in an instant. “You had a crush on me, remember?” He cocks his head to the side, a teasing grin taking over his stupidly handsome face. 
Your body cools with a mixture of embarrassment and annoyance. Oh, so he wanted to bring up the past? You put on your best ‘fuck around a find out’ smile. “Yeah, but that was before puberty hit and I had standards.” You answer the tone of your voice higher and sweeter than before. Satoru raises his brows as an amused expression takes over his face. “Shall we get to business now?” You snap, which only makes him burst out laughing. 
Satoru is walking toward you now and the alarm bells in your head start flashing. “Hey, before that I have a question I’ve been dying to know.” He leans down, planting a hand on the wall next to your head to be level with you. You stiffen, growing uncomfortable. Not with Satoru being this close, but with how much your body seems to enjoy it. 
Your brows knit together and a frown tugs your face downward. “What?” You fume, jerking your head to emphasize the word. Satoru observes you, that feeling in his stomach clawing its way up. His gaze falls to your lips for the slightest of seconds. 
He swallows, the vexing emotion wanted to be near you, beside you, touching you, in you. How troublesome. The only way for Satoru to get rid of this feeling was to somehow annoy you to the extent you never came around him again. Granted – you didn’t anyway, but this exception had nearly driven him to the edge already. “When you were little, did you ever create an illusion of me? Did you hold his hand? Practice kissing him?” Satoru inquires, feeling full of himself. Your whole face drops. You must be in a different world because he did not just ask you that. A garbled scoff sounds from your throat as you gape at him, utterly dumbfounded. 
You try to process what the hell is going on by opening and closing your mouth, raising your hands then dropping them again, and blinking rapidly. “Oh my God,” are the first words that you say. They’re also the next few thousand words you say considering how many times you repeat the phrase. 
By this time Satoru has dropped his arm, regarding you with a rueful grin. He’s backed away a few paces and you finally point a finger at him. “You are disgusting. You mean nothing to me. You’re such an annoying,” You’re panting, anger rolling through you in cold and hot waves. “An annoying.” 
“What YN? An annoying what?” Your eyes are going to bulge out of your head. He’s smirking again! Smirking!
“An annoying fuckface!” You scream, throwing your hands out in pure frustration. You groan exasperatedly before storming out of his office. 
༘⋆✿
Had you really called him a fuckface? What did that even mean? Satoru is staring at the ceiling of his city-rise apartment, unbelievably shell-shocked from the events earlier today. He flips over on his side. It hadn’t gone exactly like he planned, although he didn’t put much planning into the whole thing. Tomorrow morning you’d both meet up at Shibuya station to track down the cursed spirit. He should probably apologize for acting like an idiot…he groans and flips back onto his back. 
Morning comes like a weight of bricks. You’re both standing awkwardly in the station. The people passing by must sense something because none of them even look your way. Satoru points to the stairs leading to the street level. “Uh, we could always patrol the rooftops…” He’s being so awkward. It was honestly a hit to his ego. Usually, the ladies ate up his tease em’ and leave em’ tactic. As he stares at you a blood-curdling scream echoes from the street above. Dust shakes off of the parts of the station as a loud explosion shakes the ground. 
You glance at Satoru and he nods his head, a knowing smile creeping up his face. Finally, some fighting to get his mind off of whatever asshole thing he’d manage to say to you next. As you both reach the street ahead you’re met with chaos. Cars are being flung by a large lizard entity, but it has eyes everywhere on its body. Satoru is about to gauge an attack but you burst out laughing next to him. His footing stutters, eyes widening as he takes in your genuine laugh. It’s… kind of majestic. You hug your stomach, doubling over in laughter as you extend your hand to point at the cursed spirit. “Looks like,” you snort out a giggle, “Looks like you have some competition for having the most eyes.” 
Gojo is immediately taken aback by your words. A woman runs screaming past you as you wipe a tear away from your eye. “Now let me show you a thing or two.” You sprint toward where rubble and wreckage cause obstacles. You make light work of climbing atop a sizeable pile of rebar and pavement. “Hey, lizard breath! Over here!” Jumping up and down, you wave your arms in the air. Did Satoru have to do anything? You seem to know what to do. 
He watches you with a small chuckle as the monstrosity turns its bulbous eyes toward you. In the blink of its mucusy eyes, your image doubles. Thousands of you spread across the street, then start attacking the main body. Satoru grins, jumping in to join. “Think you could have all the fun without me?!” He yells toward you. 
You’re surprised he could easily see which one of you was the real one. Though, you guess that’s what all those eyes were for. You were working off of one another – working with each other. If your clans could see you now. You’re both laughing and fighting like taking a walk in the park. Surprisingly Satoru can’t keep his eyes off you. He wasn’t sure if it was because he wanted to protect you or simply because as you fought alongside him you proved you didn’t need his protection. When you were with him you didn’t rely on him. No, you could handle yourself, which made Satoru crave your attention. He was the strongest…but with you by his side, his strength would finally be supported rather than taken for granted. 
It doesn’t take long to deal with the cursed spirit and for once Satoru is glad you’re required to come back as a team to fill out paperwork. That way he could get a little extra time with you. He smirks to himself as you finish up in Shibuya. 
He likes the look of you in his office, sitting on the couch in the corner with a small table in front of you. A laptop, a stack of papers, and a cup of tea are all somehow set on top of the small space. Your hair is falling in front of your face as you crouch over to type away the report. He was supposed to be working too, but he’d be damned if he broke his gaze now. “You ever going to stop looking at me and actually fill out some of those files Mr. Gojo?” You hum, still concentrating on the screen in front of you. Of course, you’d figure out he was gawking, it’s not like he was hiding it. 
Satoru clears his throat and glances away. “You can call me Satoru,” He pouts. When was the last time Satoru had requested a woman call him by his given name? Out of everyone else’s mouth, it was a simple endearment, but out of yours? That was something else entirely. 
You sigh, pausing in your efforts to finish the paperwork before dawn. You roll your lips into your mouth and tap your chin. “I think I much prefer fuckface.” You say, then smile sweetly. 
Satoru nods his head, pushing out of his seat. “Yeah? You want to call me fuckface or you want to fuck my face?” He banters. Your body tenses as you watch him sit on the edge of his desk. There's a pressure building in between your thighs that you can’t ignore. Your body feels like there are phantom touches caressing all of the places you yearned for Satoru to touch. 
You huff and turn away from him. “Back to this? Where’s your dignity, your charm, your manhood?” You ask. You jerk to the side, shaking your head. “No wait- that’s not exactly what I mean to say please don’t-”
Satoru is already laughing. “My manhood? Damn, you really must be thinking up all sorts of illusions in there, but,” he crosses the room, stopping in front of your table. He pushes the laptop shut with his fingertips. “The real thing is always going to be better darlin’.”
It suddenly seems very hard to swallow, so you let out an awkward laugh before gathering up your things. “Right, sure, I have to go.” You stumble over your words, rushing for the door. If you didn’t get out of this room right now you were sure bad things would happen. By bad things, you meant letting your guard down for a second around a man who was just flirting with you for the hell of it. You were a part of a rival clan, which meant he couldn’t have you. That also meant he wanted you more than the average woman. Of that, you could be certain, but you wouldn’t be some plaything Satoru could throw to the side once he’d had his fun. 
Behind you Satoru’s face had fallen, his chest rising and falling quickly as you scurry out of his office. Good, now that the real threat had been dealt with, he had some paperwork to finish. You’d be safer away from him, not wrapped up in his clan dealings and always having to live for others. For once, Satoru wanted to be truthfully selfish – sure he would go out, drink, party, enjoy one or two ladies, but in the end he was left with himself again. Satoru couldn’t save himself and he was scared that the only one powerful enough to pull him out of this desperate cry for help…was you.
༘⋆✿
A couple of months pass by without hide or tail of Satoru. Working alongside him was honestly…freeing. You weren’t held back by the possibility of someone weaker getting hurt. You groan, turning your face to the sky above you. It was gratifying being able to let loose with your own powers. Usually that many mimics will render you immobile, but you were able to spring into action right next to them. “Ma’am, a report from the Tokyo campus,” A file is passed in front of you. As you glance through the pages you turn to glance at your boss. 
She seems busy chatting away with one of the other sorcerers. You blow out a sigh and tuck the file under your arm. “Call them back and tell them I’ll be there within the hour.” You glance down at your sweats, wincing at the fact you wore such comfortable clothes to work. “Maybe make that 2.” You mutter, a disapproving scowl taking over your face. 
You ran home to change into a pair of running shoes, black leggings, and whatever shirt was on top of your dirty laundry. Unlike someone else, you couldn’t teleport, so public transportation was your only way to reach the Tokyo campus area. Walking up the stairs takes a little more effort than you’d like to admit, but when you reach the top you’re met with a shirtless Satoru Gojo and Nanami Kento training. Your jaw practically dislocates from your mouth as you gawk. They were gliding through the air and Nanami somehow had a more excited expression on his face than before. Of course, Satoru notices you first, but that allows Nanami to get a whack in. “Hey! That was foul play.” Satoru hisses, holding his cheek. 
Nanami shrugs, bending down to pick a towel off the ground. “Should’ve put your infinity back up.” He then glances at you and smiles. Your heart warms and a cheesy smile appears on your face. “Hey YN,” He waves and for a moment you’re awestruck by how handsome he is. The Lord was kind to these men. So…so very kind. Both of them were muscular, their abdomens shaped into ridges and divots. Biceps, triceps, everything went on in rippling splendor forever. You’d thought Satoru had maintained a scrawny figure, but you were certainly proved wrong and you were so glad you were. 
 “Hi there Nanami.” You walk over to him, picking up a stray water bottle on your way. You hand it to him but he shakes his head. 
“Thank you, but that’s actually his,” he juts his thumb toward Satoru and your face falls. You toss it toward the silver-haired man and he annoyingly catches it with ease. 
He glares at you, throwing his towel over his shoulder. “Yeah, thanks YN.” He grumbles. Nanami nods toward the school building. 
“If you let me wash up I can take you to Yaga’s office.” He’s back to smiling and honestly, you might have a thing for smiles. 
You latch your hands behind your back and giggle to yourself. “That would be really sweet of you Nanami.” Satoru snorts out a laugh on the other side of Nanami. You shoot him a glare. 
“Why are you callin’ Nanami by his first name but you don me fuckface?” Satoru shoots toward you, frustration twinging all of his happiness from the earlier training session. Nanami peers between you two, and then his brows shoot up with an airy laugh. 
“Oh my God you’re the one that called him fuckface? That’s so fucking funny.” Nanami laughs toward the sky, a soft sound coming from him. 
Satoru grumbles to himself, rolling his eyes like a frustrated child. “You are coming with me.” He growls, latching onto your wrist and pulling you toward the school. 
You stumble over your footing as he yanks you down the pathway. “S-Satoru w-wait oh my God!” You yell as you finally enter the building. He tosses you into the room you know to be his office. You falter backward, catching yourself on his desk. “What’s going on, what the fuck was that?” You hiss. He stalks toward you, throwing his towel onto the couch with a little more aggression than you’d like. 
He closes the distance between you, his nostrils flaring and eye twitching. “Oh so now you call me by name? Oh well, it’s too late for that now princess. You’ve pushed me far enough.” He laughs hotly moving between your legs. He’s massive and his skin is warm, you can feel the heat radiating off of him through your pants. He towers over you in an overwhelmingly torturously attractive way. 
It was hard to understand what was happening with the ringing of your heart covering all rational thought. “What are you saying? I’m not the one that made all those stupid jokes,” You mutter, looking away from him. He hisses, grabbing onto your chin and making your gaze settle back onto him. 
He laughs dryly as you blink questioningly at him. “Yeah? You had that stupid crush on me, that’s what caused this.” He spits, but you still can’t decipher what he’s trying to get at. 
Your lips part, letting out a small exasperated breath. “Listen, I didn’t mean to crush on you again, just old habits die hard I guess,” You explain, groaning as his grip tightens on your chin. His face looks tormented like some great plague has taken over his body.  
He scoffs, tossing your face to the side. You grunt with the impact, narrowing your eyes in annoyance. “Again? Haaa,” He covers his eyes with his hand, groaning softly. “You ran away from me then ignored me YN… how does that scream ‘I have a crush on you?’” The hand that was over his eyes drags down his face. You don’t have an explanation for him because you barely had one for yourself. “You must’ve sent one of your puppets to walk around the streets by my apartment, the campus, but the one thing I can’t figure out is how you got one of them to walk around in my head. I can’t see anyone except you and I’m going crazy.” His eyes are pained and his breath is labored. You finally understand. 
“Satoru…” You whisper his name with all the softness in the world, years of loving him building up into an insurmountable emotion. He turns away from you, covering his mouth this time. 
“Fuck YN, don’t say my name like that.” He hisses and you swear you can see playboy Satoru Gojo’s ears blaze a red color. “You weren’t even trying earlier, but you made me so jealous. Nanami was flirting with you right in front of me and I couldn’t do a damned thing about it. I wanted to both be Nanami and beat the shit out of him.” He slowly lets his gaze turn to you again. “I think I’m in love with you YN,” His voice is nervous, and his eyes are flittering all over your face, searching for answers. 
In love with you? Satoru Gojo was in love with…you? After all the years of your mother telling you to stay away from that boy. You were never supposed to be in this situation, especially not with the head of the Gojo clan. But you know what they say… actually, you didn’t really care about some emotional quote that would relate to this very moment because all you wanted to do – craved to do, was kiss Satoru until the sun set behind the Tori gate. 
“Our clans aren’t going to be very happy about this new development.” You chuckle and Satoru rolls his eyes. 
“That’s not an answer YN…” Okay, so he wants words. A confirmation? What exactly did you feel? Was it love? Was it something different? You didn’t have to know now, time would solidify whatever love is. All you can do is put a name to what you’re feeling.
You smile, a blossoming feeling thumping in your chest. “Yes Satoru, I love you.” You almost don’t get the words out because Satoru slips a hand into your hair and brings your mouths together in a passionate kiss. He kisses you like he’s been a starved man all his life, like he’s never wanted to kiss someone this badly. 
Satoru is obsessed with the way you gasp between kisses and how your eyes squeeze shut. “You can open your eyes, I’m the real thing.” He chuckles and brushes his thumb against your cheek soothingly. 
You weren’t afraid Satoru was one of your illusions, but rather how real this was in the first place. When you really want something you shouldn’t the whole world kind of falls away when you get that thing. When Satoru kisses you, it’s only him and that was terrifying for someone who constantly surrounded herself with things. You peek through your lashes at him anyway. “The same thing goes for me, I’m real.” You state lamely. 
Satoru blows out a chuckle, grinning mischievously. “Mmm, I’m not so sure about that, maybe you should show me.” His eyes darken and the sweltering heat you felt before nearly doubles in size and intensity.
You put your hand over the one he has on your cheek, lowering it until his fingertips brush against the swell of your chest. His brows shoot up and before he has much time to react you move it lower to the apex of your thighs. His breathing falters as he stares, eyes swimming with lust. “Come on Gojo, show me what a rival clan can really do.” The corners of your mouth lift in an enticing smirk. 
For all the time he was irritating and downright egotistical, Satoru is a good listener now. He pushes you into the desk, groaning when your fingernails dig into his shoulders. “You sure do drive a hard bargain.” His mouth tickles against your neck, kissing a trail down to your shoulder. He pauses, taking in a breath. “Mmm, you smell so good,” He mumbles against your shirt. You flush, embarrassment running hot through your veins. Did he like the smell of your dirty shirt? If you’d known the situation you’d be in right now, you would’ve put more thought into what you were wearing. 
He brings himself back up toward your face, planting a deep kiss on your lips. A selfish moan breaks through as Satoru works his lips against yours. “God, you’re so good at that.” You breathe out. A satisfied hum rumbles from his chest. 
You take in his chest, appreciating the view. This earns a chortle from Satoru. “You know, I’m starting to think you only like me when my shirt is off.” You lean into him, wrapping your legs around his waist. Your eyes widen when you realize there’s something hard pressing into your thigh. How you didn’t feel it until now is a mystery because that thing is one of the 7 wonders of the world. Satoru grunts, pulling you up and off the ledge of his desk. “Do you feel that? I think I finally understand what the elders were talking about. All I want to do with you right now is ram my cock into you until I have you writhing under me. Then finish fucking my cum into your cervix so you can mother my children. That way, your parents will have to like me and my clan, because you’ll be a Gojo.” He’s being serious right now, setting you down on the couch. 
You bite your lip curiously. “Do you plan on wedding me Satoru Gojo?” It’s a loaded question that he didn’t have to answer. It was a sweet moment and there you had to go asking a question like that. You don’t expect Satoru to sink onto one knee, take your hand, and place loving kisses on your knucks. 
He meets your gaze, electricity burning between the both of you. “May you wrap my heart around your finger one day and bear my burdens as I will bear yours.” What was even happening? Marriage? Surely this was one big dream, because years ago when you were both kids even imagining this day seemed like a far-off occurrence. This was all so sudden, but in all honesty, when have the two of you ever conformed to conventional standards? 
You were certain of one thing, you didn’t want your first time with Satoru Gojo to be on some dusty couch in the corner of his office. “Satoru… do you think we could continue…” You glance down, running your tongue over your lips. “This elsewhere?” His eyes glimmer, his mouth quirking up in a grin. 
He stands, still holding your hand. “I just basically proposed to you and all you can think about is getting in my pants. Man, rejection stings.” He tuts, shaking his head. You roll your eyes as you both laugh, a heavyweight finally being lifted. Yeah, this felt right. 
All at once you feel nauseated and dizzy. You squeeze your eyes shut, grasping onto Satoru like he was the only thing that could hold you up. “What the fuck was that?” You gasp, blinking your eyes open to find a completely different scene than when you closed them. 
Satoru caresses your cheeks, grounding you to him. “Sorry, I promise you’ll get used to it, well… maybe not, but still I’m sorry.” 
“Where are we?” You gasp, hands still clutching his arms as you peer around the living room you appear to be in. It feels less than lived in like someone staged the whole apartment – which is what you assumed Satoru had teleported you both into.
He scratches the back of his neck while nervously chuckling. “My apartment,” His gaze falls to you, taking in how perfect you look among his things. “Do you like it?” He asks with such a look in his eyes, similar to a puppy begging for attention.
You peek out the ground to ceiling-level windows, laughing to yourself. “I didn’t know teachers got paid so much.” Satoru grins, nodding toward the windows – or rather the city outside of them. 
“Oh you know, I got kind of a side hustle going on.” He shrugs, then turns to you, that mischievous twinkle back in his eyes. “You should see the bedroom.” He offers you his hand, jerking his head to a hallway. “I hear the owner hates it when the bed is made, the least we should do is go mess them up for him.” You take Satoru’s hand and let him lead you into the bedroom at the end of the hall. 
Once the door was shut behind you the playful comments were thrown aside – replaced by frantic kisses and undressing. Satoru sits on the foot of the bed, watching you in all your splendor. Your body was that of a dream, your breasts, the slope of your stomach, thighs, fuck everything about you was glorious. Satoru couldn’t remember how to breathe gazing upon you. “Like what you see?” You tease, positioning yourself over his lap. 
You brace yourself on his shoulders, settling onto your knees. Satoru blows out a choked noise. “Thank fuck I have so many eyes because I couldn’t imagine not being able to see all of you like this.” His hands are on you, running up your back, molding his long fingers into your squishy tits, and then down your side to dig his nails into your hips. “Are you okay with this?” He inquires, tilting his head. 
You smile, but a small part of you wants to line yourself up with his cock and bottom out. “I’m okay with so much more.” You breath. He understands, after all you both want the same thing right now – crave it. 
You both wait with bated breath as Satoru lets you guide him into your entrance. With all the teasing and edging closer and closer to this moment, you were far from dry. It was a little embarrassing how slick you were considering there was practically no foreplay. You hiss as his pretty cock sinks deeper into your throbbing cunt. “That’s it, that’s my good girl. You can take all of me,” His grip on your hips tightens, helping push you onto him. A strangled moan hisses out of your mouth as you slump onto Satoru’s shoulders. “Feels s’good baby. God, you’re so perfect.” He’s kissing your temple and you’re squeezing his cock with airy moans. After a moment, he bottoms out, a guttural groan rumbling from within him. “You did so good, fuck,” 
The air feels thick, heady, and fills with the wet sound of Satoru’s cock inside you. “Go-go ahead and move.” You order with a shaky breath. He starts to move, laying back to better fuck into you. You plant your hands on his abdomen, moaning loudly. His length hits every sensitive spot at once, causing you to tremble on top of him.
Satoru chuckles, then suddenly flips you both over. “Come on YN, I thought you’re one of the strongest sorcerers in Japan, you can handle me fucking you.” 
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barefoothighlander · 2 years ago
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the vow - i
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summary: you’re betrothed to the future king of Guilder and a fearsome knight is assigned to protect you. medieval au
knight!simon ‘ghost’ riley x princess!reader
warnings: mdni (18+), age gap, violence, arranged marriage, infidelity
next part masterlist
a/n: @/dinalgo on tiktok posted some hc art of knight!ghost and i’m obsessed, so here’s my interpretation of that except I refuse to write in old English, also points if you catch the references I threw in
The sun shines brightly through the large window, the breeze blowing the trees outside your room, for a small moment, the world is quiet, just the songs of morning birds chirping on the balcony fill your ears, there’s no noise, no worries. 
The moment is quickly ruined by the sound of your maids bustling into the room, arms full of clothing and various tools, you turn your gaze to them slowly,
“Princess, good morning”
“I’ve told you a hundred times, please use my name”
“The Prince requests that we refer to you by your title m’lady”
“Well we wouldn’t want to upset him would we” Your tone is sarcastic as you make your way over to the women, one of them fixes your bed while the other prepares a bath, setting out your clothes. You step into the warm water, soothing a rag over your muscles to clean yourself before one of the ladies takes over, dumping water over your head to wash your hair. You sit for a few minutes in the water, allowing them to work around you, 
“You’re quiet this morning”
“Mm not much on my mind I’m afraid”
“You’re not excited for the festivities?”
“The feast should be nice, I don’t care much for the rest”
“Don’t talk like that” The older woman scolds, Clarice had known you since birth tending to you as a young girl, always by your side while you grew up in court, more a mother to you than your actual mother. “The Prince is handsome, a worthy adversary”
“Yes handsome, but also rude, stubborn, cold, everything I despise”
“With time you will grow to love him”
“I surely doubt that” You scoff
She furrows her eyebrows at you, “There, now let's get you dressed”
She helps you out of the bath over to the other maid, Beatrice, you had known her for less time, her position assigned to you when you came to the court after your engagement was announced. Your Father was the king of Florin, and you as his only child had the unfortunate position of being in an arranged marriage to the Prince of Guilder, the Monarchs of the country being old and weary, their son was to be crowned before the year ended and he needed a wife. Your countries had been at war for years, the violence only ceasing when your engagement had been announced, you had been in Guilder for a week now, hold up in the castle away from the public eye, today was the day that your engagement would be formally announced, a festival for your sake being held on the castle ground, thousands of people crammed inside the grounds all trying to get a look at you and the Prince, the idea made your stomach turn.
Your early years had been spent wandering the grounds of your families castle, the tall stone walls becoming a home after the years you spent in them, you felt sick for your old life, your freedom, you could run around the gardens, ride the horses whenever you wanted back home, but here, every action of yours was watched, criticized, you were told how to look, where to be and when, every part of your life was in the control of the Prince and your Father, you hated it.
You had gotten dressed, your breaths feeling tight due to the corset you wore, another freedom you yearned for was being able to wear clothing of your choosing, now everything was blue and green, the colours of Guilder, always tight on your chest to emphasize your figure, your hair was done up in a knot, a few loose strands falling to tickle your neck and cheeks.
“Beautiful” Clarice says, a soft smile on her face
“I look like a peacock”
“You do not, you’ve grown into such a beautiful woman, my little princess” Her hand is soft on your cheek, you smile at the tender action, always finding comfort in her. “Now, we must go, you’re needed downstairs”
You struggle to take a deep breath, silently cursing the fabric binding your chest as you make your way through the wide halls, they were lined with various adornments, some tapestries, a few swords hung beside scattered candles, it felt cold here, no comfort in the walls, everything was jagged and silver.
“Now, the Prince will introduce you, then the jousting will begin”
“Is anyone from Florin going to be in the duels?”
“I’m not sure my dear, there’s plenty of men from across the countries”
You nod, looping your arms through hers as you walk side by side, you stand at the large opening that leads out to the balcony above the castle grounds, everything is decorated in the countries colours, it’s so formal, you feel like a stranger in your new home, everything so similar yet so different, you had no family here, no friends aside from Clarice, you give her a soft smile before unhooking your arm, waiting for the Prince to announce you before walking out.
You step out onto the balcony, the warm sun hitting your skin, there’s a symphony of clapping and whistling, you look down at hundreds of people, all staring back at you, you wave to them,
“Sit down” The Prince speaks, you turn to him, his face is stoic, there’s no softness in his features, you abide, sitting down in the tall chair next to him. They begin the jousts, two by two the men file out, setting up on their horses, the Prince turns to you with every new competitor, explaining who they were and where they were from, including his personal opinion on the men.
You see a tall man enter the field, his armour pure black, his horse the same, he’s larger than the rest of the competitors, his helmet shaped like a skull, his chest plate donning an emblem you didn’t recognize.
“Who’s that one”
The Prince leans over the balcony to get a better look, eyes squinting in an effort to make out the symbol,
“I’m not sure, must be some farmboy playing make belief”
You respond with a small oh, the knight approaches the balcony, his hand reaching to remove his helmet, the light hits his face, streaking colours through his blonde hair, you can make out a few scars on his face, even from your distance you can see the deep colour of his eyes, his face is firm staring up at you, you’re frozen in your spot, staring back at him, he raises his lance toward you, without thinking you reach behind you, grabbing a ring of flowers held together by a ribbon, and throwing it onto his lance, it falls to the base, the flowers close enough that he could smell their aroma, he says nothing, not even a nod, he simply puts his helmet back on and moves to mount his horse.
You step back, your eyes stuck on him as you return to your seat,
“What was that?”
“Sorry?”
“You gave him your favour”
“Thought the farmboy could use some luck against Ser Michael”
“Ah, yes” The Prince goes on to ramble about the accomplishments of the opponent, his success in battle, how much he admired his bravery, but you aren’t listening, your focus completely taken by the shadowy knight galloping toward the centre of the pit, his lance raised as he thrusts it into his opponent, throwing him off his horse. The crowd erupts in cheers, you swallow thickly as you watch him get off his horse, moving toward you, he kneels in front of you,
“Simon Riley your highness”
“Where do you hail from Ser?” The Prince stands, your eyes are focused on him as he bows his head
“The North, but I am no Ser”
“You’re not a knight? You wear the armour of a knight”
“The armour belonged to my father”
“And where is he, your father?”
“Dead 10 years ago your highness”
“And tell me, why have you come”
“I come to prove my honour, to serve you”
“Very well, you may go”
You watch a few more rounds of jousting, growing bored with the same thing happening, they announce the final duel before urging the groups to attend the feast, you make your way down from the balcony, towards the high tables in the gardens, your eyes roaming over the groups of people, struggling to find a familiar face in the crowd.
“So what did you think?” The Prince asks
“About what?”
“The jousting” He scoffs
“They were all quite good”
“What about that Simon Riley”
You whip your head towards him, “I thought little of him, why?”
“Well he was rather large don’t you think, I might add him to my guard”
“Add him to mine” You speak before thinking
“Why would I add him to yours”
“I have no guard, no one to protect me”
“Well, I’ll arrange for you to choose a guard tomorrow then, perhaps then you’ll finally feel at ease here”
You nod your head, turning quickly from him, you greet the King and Queen, making small conversation about the state of the castle, the blooming bouquets of blue poppies that adorned the various pillars, your eyes are drawn to Simon, his dark appearance a stark contrast to the brightly dressed patrons that mingle around the grounds, you watch him disappear around a corner, it’s not until the Queen calls your name that you realize you had been staring at him the whole time.
“Sorry your majesty, my brain has been a fuzz all week, what did you ask?”
“That’s alright dear, with all the excitement I can hardly focus myself, I was just wondering if you had decided on a dress for the wedding”
“Oh, not yet, you’ve brought so many beautiful options I haven’t been able to decide”
“I understand, we have the best dressmakers here, but do make time to choose, we wouldn't want to delay such an important decision”
“Of course”
She smiles at you, looping her arm through her husbands as they walk on, you stand there, overwhelmed by the sights and sounds of everything happening around you, you had only a week until you were to be wed and you had every decision already made for you, your fiancee and his mother picking out every detail of the wedding down to what bouquet you’d be carrying, they had decided that you would hold a large grouping of the blue poppies you see everywhere, the royal flower of Guilder, no part of the wedding made notice of your heritage, all traces of Florin erased from the ceremony, you were to be wed according to Guilder law rather than the customs of your home.
They had arranged for your father to attend but no one else, claiming that there simply wasn’t space for extra people to join, they had cut you off from your old life completely, forcing you to conform to their way of life, moulding you into the perfect Queen, obedient and meek, you despised it, you longed for your freedom from the confines of the castle.
When the feast ended and you had spoken to all the nobility you needed to, you were escorted back to your quarters, the silence of the large stone walls consuming you once again, no birds singing, no rushing of maids, just you and the night sky. It was late, the dark consuming the outer land in a blanket of shadows as you stood on your balcony looking over the moonlit gardens, that was the only good thing about your new home, a perfect view of the perfect gardens, every shrub perfectly manicured, bending and winding in a maze that led to a small fountain in the centre, each flower a shade of green and blue. Truth be told you didn’t think much of the colours before moving but now, you despised them, every shade a sharp reminder of how you didn’t belong, the colours mocked you as they invaded your eyesight, you huffed a breath to yourself, eyeing the grounds below for any sign of guards. 
There was one roaming the grounds, you thought you could easily avoid detection if you were quick, you grab your robe wrapping yourself in it, a small attempt to keep yourself warm from the cool air of the night as you creep towards your door. They were heavy, large slabs of wood, you open in slowly to avoid any creaks, slipping through the opening and rushing down the hallway, there was a small door meant for staff that you entered, making your way down the thin stairs and peering through the door outside, the guard has his back turned, you inch the door open and slide through, quickly moving towards the gardens. You walk under a large arch of shrubs, the smell of the flowers invading your senses, bushes of wolfsbane, oleander and wisteria fill the gardens, all beautiful but deadly, a worthy metaphor for your new home, you roam the isles of the garden, lost in the hidden openings and similar corners.
After a few minutes, you find yourself in the middle, a tall fountain in front of you, it’s stunning, the intricate details of the stone swirling as the water crashes into the pool, you sit in the grass, listening to the sound, letting it relax you, finally a break from the quiet that wasn’t the screaming of citizens, or the demeaning words of your future mother-in-law. You close your eyes, the grass tickles your skin as you relax, breathing in the fresh air, you hear a small rustle in the grass, breaking you from your state, you turn your ear to the noise, calling out quietly to see if anyone was there. There was no reason for anyone to be in the gardens at this hour, in fact, the Prince practically forbade it, you stand slowly, following the rustling noise, peeking around a corner you see a quick movement turning the corner, moving faster you approach it, your heartbeat heavy as you near, you turn to find the culprit and let out a small gasp, a small white rabbit was sat, chewing on some shrubs, you kneel down extending your hand towards it.
“Come here little guy, these gardens aren’t safe for you” It hops toward you, nearly touching your hand before it turns on its heel and sprints away, you furrow your brows in confusion,
“They aren’t safe for you either Princess”
Your breath stops, you feel the looming figure behind you as you slowly stand, you heartbeat now thrumming in your ears, you turn to face him, he almost melts into the darkness of the garden, his armour pitch black,
“You should get back inside”
Goosebumps cover your skin, your breaths shallow as you stare at him, you back up slowly, turning around to move through the gardens, you turn around the corners, trying to find your way out, your feet carry you through the grass, you follow the lights inside the windows, trying to get out. You rush towards the exit, eyes focused on the light as you collide with the guard, stumbling into him,
“I’m sorry”
“Princess? What are you doing outside?”
“I just needed some air” Your breathes are shaky as he scans your face,
“Is everything alright?”
“Yes, completely, just need to go back inside I think the air was a little too cold”
“Well hurry in then” He nods, stepping aside to let you pass, you move past him hastily, opening the doors inside you make your way back up the stairs, you enter your room and release a breath, rushing towards your balcony to try and catch a glimpse of him. Your eyes scan the gardens, the night doing its job of concealing anything within the green walls, you see nothing, no movement anywhere, it's like he wasn’t even there, you think you imagined him, his deep voice ringing in your ears as you lay in your bed.
The next morning was calm, you woke early to the sound of your maids making their way inside, Clarice helping you dress and doing your hair while Beatrice makes your bed, tidying the room.
“Exciting day today” Clarice says
“What do you mean?”
“The Prince has arranged for you to pick a guard, I suppose he fears a possible war and wants you safe”
You nod at her, “I don’t believe the Prince fears for my safety as much as you do” you whisper, she shushes you, her eyes darting to Beatrice to make sure she didn’t hear, “Bite your tongue child”. You let out a small giggle, amused by how concerned she is, allowing her to finish your hair before you make your way to the throne room, you enter through the massive doors to a room of scattered men, all donning their house armour, you look around and see no sight of the dark knight. You stand atop the small set of stairs, looking down at the men as they announce themselves one by one, giving you their names and listing all their accomplishments, victories in battle, how they were undefeated in jousting in their home. You’re bored after an hour of their bragging, your mind oblivious to the fact that you have to choose one of them to be around you for hours at a time, an older man stands to speak but is interrupted by the sound of the doors opening, everyone turns their heads at the sound, their eyes widening at the sight of the tall man clad in black, he keeps his helmet on as he enters, only removing it to kneel before you.
“Simon Riley m’lady”
“Not Ser?”
“I beg your pardon”
“Everyone else here is a knight, why are you not?”
“I’m the last remaining member of my house m’lady, we’re a forgotten house”
“I expect my guard to be knighted”
“I may not hold a title Princess, but I assure you I would lay my life down for you” He turns his head to look at you as he speaks, and you release a strained breath,
“You may all leave” You address the room, Simon stands, “You stay” You look to him and he nods, the room is consumed in silence as the other men exit, leaving you alone with him, “Why were you in the gardens last night?”
“I needed to clear my head”
“It’s forbidden to be on castle grounds after dark”
“And yet you were there” He looks up to you, you swallow a thick gulp.
“You’ll be assigned to me, keep me safe”
“Thank you, Princess” He bows his head, 
“And don’t wear your helmet inside, it’s unnerving”
He fights the smile that creeps up on his lips as you turn away from him, exiting through the back of the room, you make your way to the Prince's quarters, his guards stand outside the door.
“Princess” They greet you
“Hello, I need to speak to the Prince”
They look to each other and back to you, “He’s busy I’m afraid”
“It’s a matter of staff” You try to push past them but they stop you, you furrow your brow at them, one takes a moment, knocking on the door.
“My Prince, the Princess wishes to speak with you” He shouts through the door, you hear shuffling through the door, the Prince mumbling something before he steps to the door, opening it, he’s half-dressed, his hair a mess, you watch him peer backwards, mouthing something and it all clicks in your head, you feel your chest tighten.
“What did you need my love” The name feels like a stab to your chest,
“I’ve chosen my guard, Simon”
“Simon?”
“The black knight from the feast” You watch the gears spin in his mind
“Yes very well” He turns away,
“He needs to be knighted”
He sighs, “He holds no title?”
“Not yet no”
“Fine, inform him that he should be in the throne room by nightfall, I shall do it then”
Before you can respond he closes the door, the shuffling and giggles behind the door resuming, you spare a polite smile to the guards, turning away and making your way to your quarters.
You sit at the small table in your room, your eyes watching through the window as people wander the grounds, you call for Clarice who meets your side in an instant,
“Please inform my guard he is to be in the throne room after dinner”
“Very well Princess” She smiles at you before leaving, you sit quietly in your room, daydreaming about being outside in the fields, exploring the ponds around the castle grounds, being anywhere but here. The time passes quickly, a servant knocks on your door to inform you that dinner was prepared, you make your way down to the dining hall, the air of the room feeling colder as you sit down, dinners were the same, just you, the Prince and the Queen, the King being in poor health was kept in his room, only brought out for special occasions. You sit and eat, picking at the meal in front of you as the two of them discuss wedding preparations like you aren’t there, they don’t ask for your input, deciding on things alone, after a few minutes you stand to excuse yourself,
“You’re done eating?”
You stop in your tracks, “Not particularly hungry this evening”
“Well, I should see you in a few moments in the throne room then,” He says, turning back to his conversation, disregarding you.
You make your way to the large room, the walls high, large windows separating the spaces in them, you stare at the ceiling, it’s ridiculously tall, with large chandeliers hanging from the crossing beams, there are pictures hanging on the wall, you stride past them not bothering to spare them a glance as you hear the doors open, The Prince walks in beside his own guard, Simon trailing behind them, your gaze softens as you look at him, he kneels in front of the Prince, removing his helmet, you’re close enough now that you can properly make out his features, the sharp line of his jaw, the scar that crosses through his eyebrow, and his eyes, dark and rich, his hair falling slightly across his forehead as he bows his head. The Prince declares a few words, taking a sword from his guard and tapping it onto Simon's shoulders, the knight stands to his height, he towers over the Prince, having to look down to meet his eyes, he swears a few words, giving his oath to the Prince before everything is settled. The Prince nods, stepping away and leaving the room, Simon turns to you,
“Ser Simon” You nod
“Princess”
You stand there looking at him, words unable to make their way from your lips, you simply turn and leave, his eyes following you as you exit making your way up to your room, he trails behind you, his helmet under his arm as you reach your door, he stands with his back to the wall, his eyes focusing around the halls as you enter your room. You step in and close the door, your back falling against the hard wood as you release a breath you didn’t know you were holding, bracing yourself against the door, you take a few seconds to gather your thoughts before moving further into the room, stripping yourself of your dress to put on more comfortable clothes, feeling like you could properly inhale without the burden of a corset.
You spend an hour alone in your room, pacing around trying to occupy your mind, the pale walls doing little to aid your efforts, you think to yourself for a minute, your legs carry you across the rooms towards your door where you stand for a moment, collecting yourself before opening it,
“Princess, is there a problem?” He asks
You shake your head, you’re entranced by his gaze, “Where is your family Ser?”
“My family?”
“You come here holding no title, no accomplishments, who are you?”
“I’m no one”
“Nobody is no one”
He smiles slightly, his eyes crinkling, “I come from England Princess, my family owned a farm before the war, and now I am here”
“And your family, what of them”
“Dead m’lady”
Your face drops, your heart thumps with empathy, “I apologize for my words, I had no idea”
“How could you have”
“Yes well, how did you come to be in the country?”
“I’m not sure, I left home one day and just kept going until I arrived in the countryside”
“And you chose to stay here?”
“It’s beautiful here”
“It seems that way”
“Seems?”
You stumble over your own words, careful to not give yourself away, “I simply mean it’s not my home”
“You’re not from here”
“No, I come from Florin”
“I have never been”
“Well I hope you get to see it one day, it’s beautiful, tall cliffs with waterfalls, every part of it breathtaking”
He watches you speak with deep interest, hanging on to every word that falls from your lips, “You miss it?”
“More and more every day” You admit
“And you can’t go home”
“Not if I am to be Queen” Your smile fades
He nods, you turn your gaze to him, oblivious to the fact that he’s been staring at you the entire time, his eyes memorizing every feature of your face, every smile line and ridge, you turn from him quickly, nervous under his stare.
“It’s late Princess, you should be in bed”
You turn back to him, a polite smile on your face as you walk back into your room, your hand lingers on the doorknob for a moment, wishing you could keep talking to him. You lay in your bed wide awake, the words exchanged with Simon the first conversation you’d had that didn’t concern the details of your marriage, he was the first person to ask about your feelings, your home, you figured he must’ve just been being polite, too nervous about getting sent away to say anything different to you.
Simon stands guard over your room while you sleep, turning away any guard who tried to take his position, intent on ensuring your safety within the confines of your room.
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ronwestbreeze · 1 year ago
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you're gonna go far | 6
pairing: jake sully x neytiri x tsu'tey x fem!human! reader summary: a scientist arrives on pandora (unwillingly) a year after the exile of the rda. now she must deal with the likes of a clan leader, a great warrior, and a thanator rider. . . word count: 8.5k
read on AO3
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It was a little difficult to get out of bed that morning.
One of those days.
Long and exhausting. It was challenging to get stuff done. You knew things like this wouldn’t just go away instantly. But you hoped that maybe…
It wasn’t too bad like before. You were able to think about the chores that had to be done later in the day and pushed yourself out of the bedroom.
So you went through most of the day barely existing. Norm was the first to notice your slight change in behavior because he began trying to joke more with you—no matter how bad they ended up being—and tried getting you out of your head. And you were thankful for that. At least that’s what was different this time around. You weren’t entirely alone nor held up in your room.
That was progress, right? You honestly couldn’t tell. Sometimes you felt like you were still stuck, that you weren’t moving forward. Or getting better. At least back to what you used to be.
Yet, you’ve been this way—asleep—for so long that you have forgotten what you used to be like. You forgot when the last time you smiled. You forgot when you felt the most happy or any other emotion besides anger and grief.
You wondered where that part of you went. Some days you went searching. Other days you somberly accepted that it was a part of you, that you were never going to get back.
At some point, you figured it died along with your mother.
“You want me to check on the baby today?” Norm asked you as you were getting ready for your link for the day.
You shook your head as you sat on the link bed, “No, I’ll be fine. Just one of those days, you know? We all have em’.”
He frowned when you shrugged it off or appeared a little too nonchalant about it, “Yeah, I guess.”
“Thanks for offering though.”
“Anytime, Doc.” He gave you a pat on the shoulder, while watching you particularly closely, “Just tell me you need a break. Don’t push yourself, okay?”
He was nice. You needed something like that.
Neytiri noticed it too.
While the two of you were in the garden that day, Neytiri had been saying words in Na’vi for you to repeat. And you did it, not perfectly of course, but you managed. It was just that you didn’t take in any information. Not in the way she knew you to.
You had a certain look that told Neytiri you were hanging onto her every word, whenever you were learning something new from her. Eyes slightly vibrant with curiosity.
That look wasn’t there today. Instead, in its place was a dullness and lifeless sort of unfocused gaze.
Your ears were low again.
Neytiri didn’t know when she became so attentive to your moods or facial expressions. So much so that she could tell when you were somewhat happy and really, painfully sad—
You were just easy to read in this form.
Yes, that was it.
“What is wrong, tanhi?” Neytiri eventually asked because she didn’t completely despise you so much to ignore your change in mood.
There was a twitch in your ears when you heard your name being called. You looked up from the newly planted mushroom seeds you had been mentally counting at Neytiri to find her staring at you expectantly. “Huh?”
She rolled her eyes, “You are not listening. I know you are distracted. What is wrong with you?”
You cringed at yourself for allowing yourself to get so distracted by your swimming thoughts. Drowning in them as usual. “It’s nothing. Just have a lot on my mind.”
But the answer did not satisfy her. Neytiri shook her head, “Sky People are always hiding their feelings. You are doing that. It is okay to be sad. It is natural.”
“I’m not hiding it—” You sighed, turning your gaze back to the mushroom seeds. “It’s just one of those days. Maybe—Maybe today I am sad. I could barely get out of bed and tomorrow it might be worse—what are you doing?”
You watched as Neytiri got up and moved behind you. A second later, you feel a brief tugging at your hair until it became loose from your short braid. “If you want to learn our ways, then you must take care of your hair. I look at it and it is a mess.”
“It was in a braid before…”
“I did not like it.”
With that, she got up again and trekked back into the forest. You watched her go in bewilderment at the sudden change of conversation and attitude from the Na’vi woman. You had no idea what had come over the woman or what made her suddenly leave, but you didn’t focus on it for too long. The confusion and startlement you had was enough energy to continue planting the rest of the mushrooms. You didn’t bother putting your hair back into a braid, not wanting to spend time threading through the thick strands until your fingers were too sore to complete your job. And the last thing you needed was something stopping you from finishing this one simple task—
A splash of cold water was suddenly dumped onto your head, leaving you soaking wet.
And terribly pissed.
You snapped your head behind you to find Neytiri placing the leaf down next to her—which was glistening with water. The same water that was now spilled all over you.
“Neytiri—ouch!”
“Hold still.” Neytiri hissed at you as she ran her long fingers through your hair.
You grumbled but reluctantly listened, still confused and a bit pissed at what was going on. And for a while, the two of you remained there. You, sitting on the ground still counting the seeds quietly to yourself while Neytiri stayed behind you. Braiding a few strands of hair.
It was then you realized just how different your hair was from the way it was in your human body. The hair length was very similar to how you used to wear it when you were a teenager. You wondered then just how old this avatar body was.
Once she was finally finished, she crouched down in front of you to get a better look. Her yellow irises scanning your face and her work. Tucking rebellious strands behind your ear, patting down some of the fuzziness, and making sure the braid was visible around your face.
You watched her quietly. And soon, when she was done obsessing over your hair, she watched you too.
It wasn’t the way you and Jake watched each other. This—this had something different about it.
Time was an illusion here. Trapped in her yellow gaze. You hadn’t realized you had been staring for so long—nor did you realize you had briefly glanced at her lips—until a sudden sound from the forest pulled the both of you out of this strange trance.
And once you snapped to your senses, your body quickly reacted. You shot to your feet and cleared your throat, “I gotta check on the avatar now.” You didn’t meet her gaze. “I’ll see you.”
Before she could stop you, you already scurried off. Stopping once you were far enough away out of her sight.
Stopping when you felt a new pair of eyes watching you rather closely.
You glanced around the forest surroundings as you approached the longhouse with a frown until your eyes locked on another pair of yellow eyes. Severe ones.
Tsu’tey was in the trees further away but enough for you to see him watching you, even when you caught him doing so. He did not look away from you. Narrowed eyes and that scowl resting on his angular face.
For a moment you wondered what the look was for. You wondered what he could yell at you about this time, even though you listened to his demands and had stayed away from the Omatikaya territory.
A scared part of you wondered if he had seen you and Neytiri just now.
Nothing happened. But still, it would give enough ammunition for him to verbally attack you. Hate you even more possibly.
Except there would be no battle today. As Tsu’tey disappeared within the trees without a word.
You were confused but relieved at the same time.
Dealing with an angry clan leader was not on your to-do list. Nor were you properly prepared for it.
After watching the trees in silence, you eventually went inside.
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Neytiri watched your retreating figure with a frown, her heart…shifting—only a little bit as you disappeared. Her gaze then moved toward the trees, the area where the sound had come from before. And with an irritated frown, she got up and stalked toward the area.
They were still there. She could feel their eyes on her as she went further into the forest. With a hiss, she glared at the trees, “Come out. Enough hiding!”
Just a little bit above her, a few feet away a familiar warrior snaked out of the bushes and seated himself on the large branch with his usual expression he wore whenever he was away from their shared hut.
Neytiri frowned up at Tsu’tey, “You are watching me.”
“I am watching her.”
After a beat and a quiet sigh, Neytiri climbed up the tree and joined him. Despite his very sour mood, he tugged her close to his side as they sat together. On the branch, they had a good view of the Avatar Compound. A few dreamwalkers were running about but none of them seemed to bother Tsu’tey as much as you did. Neytiri could easily tell with how he kept glaring at the longhouse, the same place she always watched you disappear in whenever you left your false body.
“You have been spending time with her,” Tsu’tey stated more so than asking. There wasn’t much to hide, they both knew Neytiri spent some of her free time visiting you. Only when Tsu’tey or Jake are busy with their duties and she’s finished with hers before the both of them. “I do not like it.”
“She has done nothing.” Neytiri reasoned.
“Yet.”
“And what did I say if she does? I would kill her myself.”
As she said this, Neytiri felt a certain wavering in her heavy words. Like a part of her didn’t believe it anymore.
She rested her head on his shoulder, hugging his arm with a content sigh, “But I cannot ignore what the Great Mother has shown me. She has stopped my bow before and now she’s done it a second time. Do you not think it means something, yawne?”
In the corner of her, she watched as his jaw tightened, his features becoming particularly focused. “I do not trust this.”
“You do not trust the Great Mother?”
“That is not what I mean.” He corrected her calmly. Neytiri knew that Tsu’tey, like any other child of Eywa respected her and trusted in her signs. Always had. That was how he was raised. And she knew he wasn’t about to abandon that because of one demon.
But his words were still reluctant, “I do not know where our Great Mother is leading us. I do not know why she wants that demon spared—when she is just like the rest of them.”
Neytiri considered his words, “Perhaps she is like Jake—”
“There is only one Jake. And she is nothing like him.”
She made a sound of disagreement but didn’t push further on the subject. She noticed how tense he was, how tense he had been for the past week. She wondered then if he was truly upset by this or if there was something more to this quiet anger he so carefully restrained. Of course, his hatred for the Sky People was no question.
But Neytiri knew Tsu’tey.
Skin and bone. Heart and soul.
She knew her mate. Not only as a mate but as a friend. They had grown up together. Along with her sister, Sylwanin. There was nothing he could hide from her even if he tried.
“She may not be like Jake. But clearly, the Great Mother has chosen her for a reason. My mother even allows her to stay—I believe it is time you seek the answers.”
Tsu’tey scoffed but didn’t brush her off. Instead, he leaned in closer, allowing his hand to rest on her growing stomach. “You will be a great Tsahik.”
“Not as great as my mother. Nor my sister.”
Tsu’tey shook his head and cupped her cheek, “You will be great, my beautiful heart.”
A soft smile tugged at her lips only to falter when she noticed how exhausted he truly looked. How close he looked to breaking but hiding it. He could never hide it well from her. Nor Jake.
She then took his face in her hands and whispered soothingly, “What is it, my love?”
Knowing that there was no point in denying a response—knowing that Neytiri would not stop until she got what she wanted—Tsu’tey turned away from her to stare back at the compound.
“The Tipani clan are becoming reckless. They already do not like the Sky People that have stayed—but now that the demon has come, I worry they will begin to take matters into their own hands. I worry…that our clans will begin to clash.”
Neytiri took his hand in hers and pressed a gentle kiss onto his knuckles, “If it comes to it, I will stand by you. Jake will too. But I also will ask you to speak to our Great Mother about your troubles.” She caressed his exhausted lines with a small frown, “I worry for you, Tsu’tey. I do not want you to take on this task by yourself. You have Jake and I to be with you. That is why Eywa brought us together.”
Right then, he seemed to consider her words. His gaze was still unfocused while staring at the longhouse. A silence settled between them.
“Eywa has created this new path for us.” Tsu’tey mused. “Somedays I wonder if it will lead to something good in the end.”
“Do you think it won’t?”
He was silent. And Neytiri didn’t push.
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When Tsu’tey went to the Vitraya Ramunong, the night had already settled around him. When he went to kneel at the tree, connecting his queue to one of the links, his prayers were silent. But his questions were clear. His intention was pure to the Great Mother.
What does it all mean? Guide me, All Mother.
So when a single atokirina flew away from the tree, Tsu’tey took to following it both out of curiosity and apprehension. The Great Mother’s answers weren’t always clear. If anything, her signs only led to more questions.
So, Tsu’tey wondered. He wondered if this would lead to any more answers.
Or just more unwanted questions.
Tsu’tey rushed through the forest, never losing sight of the spirit. He kept going and going until he was nearing the Sky People’s base. Until the trees suddenly became familiar. Until the grounds he had seen many times before unwillingly began to appear around him.
But his body never stopped moving. He never stopped following it. Too desperate for answers. Too desperate, too yearning.
Oh Eywa, he was yearning.
And then, and then, and then.
And then he was staring down at your still false body.
It was strange. Seeing no life in your face. Tsu’tey had only seen your false body from far away, but now seeing you up close. You looked so different yet the same as your human form.
Why was he here? Why did the spirit bring him to…
No.
No.
No.
His vision rippled. Your body morphed from your human form to your false body—impossible.
And then he woke up.
Awake.
Awake.
Awake.
Tsu’tey finally realized where he was. Instead of standing in the middle of the forest chasing an atokirina, instead of standing over your false body, he was back in his hut. With his mates sleeping next to him. With his son cuddled between both Jake and him. With Neytiri hugging his waist from behind.
A dream. It was only a dream.
But why you? Why you?
Why?
“Yawne?” Tsu’tey breathed out a sigh and looked over his shoulder to find Jake shifting out of his sleep, looking at him through heavy eyelids. He sat up a bit, careful not to disturb Neteyam’s sleep as he did, “Another nightmare?”
Tsu’tey hesitated—considered the question. The dream he just had. Was it a nightmare?
“No. I am fine. Go back to sleep, my love.”
Jake didn’t look entirely convinced but eventually lied back down. Usually, it took a while for Jake to fall asleep, so Tsu’tey lay back down, adjusting Neytiri’s arm around his waist and squeezing his other hand on Jake’s shoulder.
“Are you sure you’re okay?” Jake asked, his voice deep and sluggish.
Tsu’tey nodded, and tucked his nose into Neteyam’s cheek as gently as he could, “I am now.”
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It took you a little longer to get out of bed the following week. But you managed. You watched a few more of your mother’s logs and even some of the other ones still in the system.
Dr. Augustine. Norm. Some guy named Quaritch. And then there was Jake Sully.
As a human.
You paused the video to examine his face. You suppose the traits matched his now blue form. The only difference was that instead of his longish dreads, he had a buzz cut in the video. And a tattoo poking out of his short sleeve shirt.
Eventually, you moved on, willing yourself to forget his face for the time being.
You also tried not to think about the fact that Neytiri hadn’t been back for about a week now. Which was normal. You didn’t overthink it. Especially not after that moment—
Eventually, you moved on, willing yourself to forget your thoughts about her.
Then you remembered Tsu’tey. Him watching you so closely. You hoped he didn’t see you and Neytiri. Frankly, you weren’t sure what would happen if he did know.
He’d kill you. That’s for sure.
Eventually, you moved on, willing yourself to forget all three of them.
When you finally got out of bed, you continued with your regular schedule and tried to think of literally anything else. You tended to your garden by yourself and continued checking the baby.
There was a bit of determination for yourself, to keep moving. To not stay in one place any longer or else you’d be stuck.
And you weren’t sure if you’d make it out if you did.
Jake continued visiting the tank room whenever he could.
Today was one of them. Only this time you made it before he did.
“How’s the baby?”
You glanced up briefly from your notes, “Healthy. It might be because Na’vi babies might grow faster in pregnancy—judging by that we might have a couple more months before it’s born.”
Jake nodded, his face serious, “Anything else?”
For a brief second you didn’t respond, too caught up in your thoughts until you realized he had asked you a question. Jake tilted his head, brows furrowed at you.
You shook your head eventually, “No, everything’s all normal.”
He stared at the belly for a moment longer before he left. You were somewhat surprised at his quick retreat but didn’t think much about it. He was some type of great warrior, he was probably busy with something else in his clan. If it meant that the two of you didn’t have to interact much with him anymore or probably a lot shorter than before, then you were okay with it.
It seemed he finally took the hint.
All you could do was keep moving.
Jake came again the next day.
This time around you brought out the ultrasound.
He watched you and the machine intensely. You noticed and gave a sound close to a huff or a snort, “Nothing’s wrong with it. I’m just doing a thorough check-up today.”
A quick look of relief crossed his otherwise exhausted features, “Right, right, of course.”
Once you got the ultrasound running and connected to the avatar, you immediately found the heartbeat with the blurry image of the fetus appearing on the screen. It had grown considerably since the first time you saw it.
“There she is.” You mumbled mostly to yourself. The heartbeat was calming in a way, easing your usual tense muscles.
Jake perked up instantly, staring at you in disbelief, “She? It’s a girl?”
You glanced up at him briefly to find a soft expression on his face upon looking at the fetus. Neteyam—who you just noticed attached to his chest—sleepily snuggled closer to his father’s chest. When his head moved out of the sling, Jake held the back of his head, giving it support.
“Yes.” You gave a short nod.
Another look of relief flashed across his face, this time he didn’t try to hide it like before. A small smile tugged at his lips, “That’s—That’s nice. Amazing.”
In the corner of your eye, you watched him. That easy fatherly expression fell upon his face. How soft his smile was, for something that wasn’t even his. You weren’t sure what to think of it—no, you expected it. It was foreign. A father loving his child. To you at least.
You didn’t know your father. Nor did you have a father figure in your life. That type of love was unfamiliar to you.
Love itself was a foreign concept that you could not yet grasp. The only time you could truly say you experienced something close—similar to love—was with your mother.
And if love was like this—heavy. Leaving you…like this.
You weren’t sure you would want to experience any type of love ever again.
“You sure you’re ready to take on another?” You raised your brows, not looking up from the belly.
Jake looked at you, “Do you care for my answer?”
“I am watching over her. I suppose I should make sure she is left with somewhat tolerable parents—that is, if there aren’t any problems with her when she’s born.” You hummed, rolling your eyes at the sudden look of worry on his face. “Relax, that’s the standard check-up of any baby—well, I don’t know how different it will be compared to human ones.”
A beat went by before he finally answered, “I wouldn’t be honest if I said I wasn’t nervous. What new parent isn’t?”
“Mmm.”
The rest of the session was just the two of you, sitting in a somewhat comfortable silence. Comfortable for you because you were able to ignore him without any problems. And Jake wasn’t being too talkative or apologetic, which was a plus. But he was noticeably less hostile toward you as the time went by. Showing that he was taking the truce quite seriously and keeping his end of the bargain.
In other words, the truce was possibly the best option for you both. You could work in peace without being hammered or interrogated. And Jake would continue his visits without any problems.
You still didn’t like him. And you were sure the feelings were mutual.
But things were becoming easier.
And sometimes you like easy. Just as much as a challenge.
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There was a part of him that was curious. Jake didn’t understand it. He didn’t understand Neytiri’s easy trust in you but it only made him more curious as he kept coming to see the baby.
Of course, you were guarded and curt around him. And he was quite the same but that didn’t mean he wasn’t at least a little bit interested in why you were so important to their deity.
So many questions.
A part of him wanted to ask Eywa himself—he wasn’t much used to praying to her but he would now and then out of respect for the People. If he asked, he would possibly gain an answer—which was incredibly rare—or he would gain more questions, which was the more common response.
So, Jake took to finding things out for himself. Even if it meant doing it the hard way. Even if it meant getting his head out of his ass and finally putting things into perspective.
Jake Sully was willing to at least keep this tolerable relationship with you going. Keeping this stable cord steady. You weren’t going anywhere anytime soon. It was time he had to get used to it. It was time for him to get over himself.
And he was willing to show that he did want something different. That he was ready to change, to finally understand you in a way.
But you still didn’t like him. Which was fine.
He didn’t like himself all that much either.
Another week went by and Neytiri still hadn’t come back. Surprisingly, you found yourself missing her. And when you began missing others, you got angry.
Since you didn’t feel like going through that process again, you resolved yourself to thinking that she must’ve gotten busy with her clan. Or grown tired of watching over you and your depressing personality once she realized that you weren’t a threat to her clan.
That must’ve been it. That’s what you chose to believe at that moment.
One day at a time.
You moved forward. Because you had to.
Throughout the week you focused on your work tending to the garden, checking on the baby, and even taking on more responsibilities around Hell’s Gate.
Sometimes you’d help Dr. Patel in the bio labs, other times you went with the other avatars to train your body. There were also days you would help Norm pack different human items he’d usually bring for the Na’vi children of the Omatikaya Clan. You, of course, never ventured too close to their territory whenever you went with him to drop off the items. You’d either stay in the ship you flew in or stay at the base as he left on his own.
Jake still kept coming around but his time there became shorter and shorter with each visit. Again, you didn’t bat an eye. You welcomed it and continued with your work.
Toward the end of your busy and long week, you woke up with a start when a blaring sound struck your room. It had to have been the middle of the night as you looked around frantically, only to realize the sound was coming from your tablet.
Quickly, you grabbed it to find the alarm was the system alerting you something was wrong.
And the problem was coming from the tank room.
You stumbled out of your bedroom and dashed through the long halls until you finally ended up in the tank room. Not caring that you were probably making a bunch of noise in the process.
When you got to Augustine’s tank, your heart sank when you found Grace’s avatar was violently twitching with the lights inside of the tank blaring a red.
“Fuck!” You hissed as you immediately checked for the problem.
The first thing you checked was the avatar itself. Her heart and the baby’s were fine but the avatar’s was slightly elevated, probably in response to whatever was happening to the machine which was the next thing you began to check.
There you discovered that something in it was malfunctioning. Throwing the liquid temperature off, the placentiums weren’t giving any more nutrients like they were supposed to. Whatever was going on, you didn’t have time to fix it or the machine.
If you wasted time like that more damage could be done and you weren’t going to risk that. Especially when the baby was in there. Especially when the baby could receive the worst of your mistake. Of this malfunction.
So, you worked fast.
You searched the room for an empty tank—which you were able to find and rolled it over next to the one Dr. Augustine’s avatar was in. You pulled the empty tank open just as Norm and a few other scientists entered.
“What happened?!” Norm questioned hastily.
Quickly, you jumped down from the empty tank and rushed toward Grace’s, “It’s malfunctioning. I don’t know why but we have to move her.”
Thankfully, Norm didn’t ask any more questions. He ordered the other scientists to help you.
You worked quickly. Draining the rest of the liquid from the tank, carefully moving the avatar—this required multiple hands—until you placed it in the new tank.
“Track her heart rate.” You ordered one of them.
A second later, a woman responded, “Stable but its body temperature’s dropping fast.”
By the time she said that you closed the tank. “Norm, fill it up.”
You jumped down, grabbed the heart monitor from the female scientist, and watched the lines closely. The tank was nearly filled up as Norm came up beside you.
Along with the heart monitor, your heart pounded through your ears as the tank finally filled up. You gave the monitor to Norm and went to adjust the temperature back to the usual settings.
When the blue lights came on it felt as if the room breathed a huge sigh of relief. You took the monitor back as Norm hummed, “Lucky you were the one to get here first. And quick thinking too—do you know what went wrong with the other one?”
The rest of the scientists poured out of the room as you slowly shook your head. “I don’t know. I couldn’t waste time, Spellman. Not when it could’ve risked the baby.”
Norm nodded and patted your shoulder, “You’re right. Good work, Doc.” He moved to the other side of the tank with a thoughtful expression. “You want me to stay and help with anything else?”
The lines on the monitor were stable, which brought you some sense of comfort. And yet the slight panic remained. “No, no. I’m good here. You can go back to bed. I’ll finish up here soon.”
“Okay.” Norm eventually moved toward the exit. “Get some sleep, Reeds. I’m serious.”
You nodded without looking at him. “Yeah, sure. Goodnight.”
“Good morning.” Norm corrected with a tired grin.
With that, Norm left. You breathed in a steady breath before grabbing a chair from the corner of the lab and sinking onto it. The monitor was kept nearby, the heart rate melodic in your ears as you set your tablet down on your lap.
For a while, you studied how far along the avatar was. It had been a good couple of months since you first discovered the child—which left her at about twenty-four to twenty-seven weeks at least. That’s not even counting when she first got pregnant. But compared to a human, the Na’vi pregnancy went by a lot faster, which also confirmed your theory.
Or maybe your perception of time was fucked up with how distracted and busy you had been.
Was that why the malfunction happened? Were you too distracted to notice any faults in the system during your usual sessions? What did happen?
You contemplated this for a while. Until your mind became hazy and your eyes droopy. At some point, you fell asleep next to the tank because there was no way you would leave the fetus’ side at that point. Not after all of that.
It felt as if your eyes had been closed for only a couple of seconds before you were suddenly jolted awake to find Norm standing over you.
“What happened? Is it the tank again?” You instantly asked, turning to check on the tank.
“No, no, no—the—she’s fine!” Norm quickly assured while easing you back into your chair. “I thought I told you to get some sleep.”
You stared at him for a beat, both a tired and an annoyed expression easily falling upon your face. “Well, I assure you I certainly wasn’t sitting with my eyes closed just then.”
Norm winced, “Sorry. I thought you’d want to get in your own bed before Jake gets here.” He rubbed the back of his neck as you got up from the chair. “I had to tell him what happened—he’s flying over now.”
“That’s fine.” You grumbled. “I can stand just one day in the same room with him. Besides, I should probably figure out what went wrong with that tank.”
Norm nodded, “Okay—uh, should I be a mediator for the both of you or..?”
“Oh, please.” You rolled your eyes. “It’s not like I’m meeting their clan leader.”
“You really need to try and get along with him.” Norm chuckled with a shake of his head.
You scowled, “Are you going to keep yapping in my ear about it or be useful?”
“Alright, alright, don’t an ass.” He strolled toward the doorway. “Jake’ll be here in fifteen.”
Once he left, you got to work again. You weren’t an official engineer but you knew a good amount of information from your training back on Earth. You hoisted yourself up and into the tank before you began taking it apart. You stood in it, trying to find out what exactly had gone wrong—while glancing at the heart monitor now and then.
Your brain was moving quickly yet hazily from the sleep. Eyes honed in on the mess of wires in front of you. So distracted by your silent questions and theories that you didn’t hear the incoming footsteps. Only the voice that followed after.
“What happened? Is she okay?”
“Yes, she’s fine.” You replied immediately, watching in the corner of your eye as he approached the new tank. His hair was tied back and across his chest was a leather strap that carried what looked like a machete. “It was just a malfunction with the tank. We were able to get her out before any real damage could be done.”
Jake frowned, “Malfunction? How the hell did you let that happen?!”
“Look, I don’t know.” You replied calmly, ignoring the twitch in your jaw. “I’m still trying to figure all that out. But she’s out of it and fine. Norm helped if that makes you feel better—”
“I thought you had things handled? What happened to that?” Jake scowled, his tone vicious.
“I do.”
“Then what the hell happened—”
“I already said I don’t know!” You seethed, glaring down at the group of wires now hanging from your hands. Somewhere in the back of your brain, you realized that Norm really did have to stand between the two of you. That this truce wasn’t stable enough. That the two of them were just too explosive. “The hell do you think I’m trying to do? Kill the baby?!”
You missed the way Jake’s face faltered slightly, catching himself. “No…No, that’s not what I—”
“Then get off my fucking dick!” You snapped, throwing a piece of the tank to the floor with a clatter.
All sound was gone from the room then.
This was the last thing you wanted to deal with. Being scolded like some child—like you already weren’t beating yourself up over this mess.
You sunk onto the floor of the tank and continued working. Because that’s what you were best at. Not conversations. Not people. Not love.
Work. It was everything to you.
Already you were mentally drowning Jake out, ignoring the fact that there was another person in the room with you. But eventually, you realized that there was nothing wrong with the wires. It must’ve been something else. Another theory down the drain.
Jake uttered your name at one point. And you ignored him.
There was a sigh followed by a short pause before he spoke, “I’m sorry.” You continued ignoring him. There was something about his apologies. You were just tired of them. “That wasn’t fair, you’re right. I shouldn’t have come at you like that—”
“Augustine’s avatar is over there.” You mumbled. “You can check on her yourself.”
There was another silence but you were too focused on what was in front of you to notice or care. You were so determined to ignore him and the sting in the corners of your eyes.
You didn’t like to cry. Especially in front of others.
Thankfully, you ignored him long enough until you realized you were finally alone.
After a while, you breathed out a tired sigh.
Fortunately, as the days went by there were no other problems with the new tank or baby, but it didn’t stop you from always double-checking everything after that close call. So much so that you didn’t realize how much sleep you were missing until Norm pulled you away from your work and forced you back into your room. Locked the door and everything just to make his point.
With the promise of Norm taking care of your work, you eventually allowed yourself to sleep for practically the entire day. Not without the tablet on the dresser next to your bed of course.
Even after catching up on some semblance of sleep, Norm still didn’t let you get back to your schedule right away. Which irritated you of course.
“I don’t want you in my garden, Spellman.”
He rolled his eyes, “And I don’t want you stressing yourself out. As your friend and colleague who happens to care about your well-being, I demand you stay away from the garden until you’re completely rested.”
You frowned at him, “We’re friends?”
“Shut up and accept my love.”
And he kept true to his word. Norm kept you away from the gardens, even the tank room. And made sure that the scientists knew how to keep you away as well. He covered all of his bases.
Damn him.
You couldn’t sit around and do nothing though. So, at some point you were so desperate you resorted to practically begging Norm to just give you something to do that would distract you throughout the whole day. You nagged and nagged and nagged until Norm finally gave in.
“There’s an old link shack north of Hell’s Gate. We’ve been thinking about restoring all of them around the area. But that particular shack’s connection is a little wonky. Maybe you could head over and restock the supplies with your avatar. Maybe even fix the connection while you’re at it.”
You nodded quickly, “Yeah, sure thing. I’ll get on that—”
“And don’t try to sneak your way to the gardens!” Norm added sternly, sending you a look over his shoulder while clicking away at his computer. “Plus, you won’t need the Samson ships. The shack’s not too far from here.”
With that, you went to grab supplies, such as med kits, weapons—one gun and a few stacks of ammo—blankets, Na’vi weapons, a hunting knife, and a bow with a few arrows. You kept the hunting knife to yourself just in case.
After getting all of this, you placed the bag of supplies in the compound longhouse where your avatar always slept when you weren’t linked. Once you got to your link bed and linked up with your avatar, you grabbed the hunting knife and the bag of supplies before taking off north from Hell’s Gate.
The sky was grey today with a few darker clouds on the horizon instead of the shimmering blue you were used to. A storm might’ve been coming.
Which meant you had to make this trip quick. There was no telling how bad these storms could get on this planet.
Similar to how you traveled through the forest with Neytiri, you took to the trees so that you’d have less of a chance of running into or disturbing any of Pandora’s finest. Hopefully, you had learned to be quiet enough to not draw any attention your way as well.
As time went by, the sky got darker. You followed the coordinates Norm gave you while slipping through the trees like the true shadow you were. Traveling and climbing through the trees got easier as you went. You had done it enough times with Neytiri that you knew what to do and how to do it. Albeit not perfectly, but enough to get by. Blending into the environment as best as you could.
You enjoyed it, the vibrant life and colors of the forest once again. Every time felt like you were taking in Pandora for the very first time. Every time felt like a huge breath of the freshest air. Here, you were weightless. You weren’t a scientist. You weren’t human. You weren’t an avatar. You were just were.
You existed here. You were real.
Truly this place was everything you dreamed of when you were younger.
Rain began to pour by the time you spotted the shack. It was propped up and well hidden in a large tree, with moss growing out of the sides, the entire thing looking like it hadn’t been used in a long time.
You slid down from a branch as quietly as you could and landed in front of the metal entrance. By the time you got the door open and crouched inside, you were soaking wet from the rain.
The shack itself wasn’t too small, which surprised you. It must’ve been made to allow avatars to be able to roam freely through here without too much trouble.
Once the door was closed, you sunk onto the empty cot in the corner of the shack and began unpacking the supplies. The med kit went into the cabinets above a wooden table attached to the wall. The blankets went on the cot. The gun and ammo went under the cot in a long black case filled with old and rusted weapons you had to throw out into the rain. You kept the hunting knife tucked in your shorts.
The rain kept going. It was relaxing. Stopping for a moment to listen. Smelling it through the cracked window next to the cot you sat on.
It was nice. You could stay here if you wanted. This could’ve been your new home if you didn’t have responsibilities at Hell’s Gate.
Lastly, you worked on the radio that sat on the wooden table—which you assumed was connected to the main base. So, for the next few minutes, you took your time messing with the radio. Listening to either ongoing static or barely audible voices going in and out. At some point, you messed with the wires a few times before Norm’s voice finally came through.
“Tomato. Tomato. Tomato.”
You pressed one of the buttons, “Hey, Norm.”
“Oh, Jesus! Reeds!” Norm startled. “Warn a guy next time!”
You pressed your lips into a thin line, “I just wanted to test if it worked. Clearly, I fixed it.”
A snap of thunder drew you away from the radio. Seemed like it was getting worse out there. You hadn’t realized how long you’d been out there until now.
Norm seemed to realize this too, “You gonna stay there and unlink?”
“Mmm.” You paused. “I’m gonna try bringing the avatar back.”
He sighed, “Alright, good luck.”
“Don’t need it.” You said as you got up. “I’m too awesome.”
“Whatever, Reeds.”
Another clap of thunder filled the air as you stepped out of the shack. Immediately you were soaked by how heavy the rain was.
Thunder continued to boom, making your skin jump every now and then. It was just terribly cold, making you start to run so that you could get out of it faster.
You ran and ran, and ran, and ran, and ran, only to realize just how much noise you were making and that the area was too unfamiliar to you. It wasn’t long until you realized how lost you were. It was just too dark to navigate your way back or recognize any familiar spots guiding your way.
With that in mind, you went toward the nearest tree and began to climb.
But your body was yanked away from the tree bark almost instantly as you were tackled down to the ground by a large weight. Your left shoulder exploded with vicious pain as if a bunch of sharp knives buried itself into your skin and continued to tear through it.
A strangled scream left your lips as the thunder clapped in the sky once more. You could barely see the creature but it was a dark, large beast. Digging further into your shoulder.
You hadn’t even seen it coming. You hadn’t been paying attention.
Now…
Now you might die because of it.
You tried shoving at it, managing to get most of its weight off of you. But the teeth were still in your shoulder. There was still pain. There was still warm liquid dripping down your arm.
When you moved your leg, you remembered the hunting knife in your shorts. Immediately, you dug into your pocket and found the handle instantly.
After that, you didn’t waste any time stabbing at it blindly and desperately. You did this, you kept going until more warm liquid covered your knife-wielding arm. You did this until the animal was limp against your body. Until you were able to push it off and scramble to your feet and run.
The pain was awful but bearable enough for you to run back to the shack at least. Mud was all over your clothes—some of it in your mouth. If anything, you probably looked insane right now.
You ran. Ran. Ran. Ran. Ran. Way too clumsy to be quiet. What’s worse was you had no clue where you were. And there was more shuffling coming from the bushes and trees surrounding you. If anything, you were probably throwing yourself further into the lion’s den.
It wasn’t long until a black creature suddenly came out of the bushes in front of you, causing you to stumble to a stop as it made its way toward you. Sleek and dangerous. Eyes locked on you.
Thunder boomed again. An identical creature came out from your right. Another on your left. Another. And another. And another.
Until you were surrounded. Until you knew there was no way you were going to make it out of this.
You kept your knife in front of you, trying to ignore the pain in your shoulder, the warm liquid running down your arm, the shakiness in your legs. You began to wonder how much blood you were losing with your energy slowly dwindling as time went by—no, it didn’t matter.
Damn it, you weren’t going to die here! Not like this.
“Come on!” You hissed as you pointed the knife at them. “Come on!”
They growled at you, closing in. Finally, one of them pounced toward you. With the knife, you slashed at it. At that, the creature cringed away and missed you entirely but that didn’t mean the others were going to try their luck.
Out of instinct, you stumbled back as two more tried coming for you. Your back hit a tree as you yelled and swung your knife wildly at them.
Only neither the creature nor your blow landed.
The two creatures were thrown to the side as another clap of thunder struck your ears.
Another figure emerged from the trees and rushed toward you.
Instantly, you swung the knife, only for it to be caught in an iron grip.
You screamed.
“Hey, hey, easy!”
It took you only a couple of moments for you to register the words and that they were coming from a familiar avatar. The last person you ever expected to be here.
Jake lowered your arm with a hiss. You blinked as another round of thunder rattled your ears.
The creatures were closing in again. Jake turned his back to you, hissing at them. His larger arm stretched in front of you protectively when one of them got a little too close for his liking. The creature hissed back
You watched warily behind him, still clutching the dirtied knife. Both of you exhausted and animalistic. Yellow eyes glimmering. One with warning and the other with desperation.
Jake looked terrifying in this light. Just as murderous and dangerous as the animals that surrounded you.
You remained behind him, trembling but glaring. Gripping that knife like your life depended on it.
There was suddenly more shuffling, more thunder, and the creatures then scattered.
You, dumbfounded by this, spoke shakily, “Why did they—”
Jake grabbed your wrist holding the knife.
“We need to move.” He said, dragging you forward.
The two of you ran in the opposite direction of the creatures. He hauled you up a tree before climbing up himself. “Is there a link shack nearby?”
For a moment, you wondered how he knew about the link shacks. You leaned on a branch both to catch your breath and because the quick movements left you a bit dizzy. When you couldn’t come up with plausible answers to your silent question you instead said, “I just came back from one. North from here—I don’t know how far it is.”
Your body leaned a little too far. Jake was quick to grab you in his stronger, more stable arms as he pulled you away from falling off the edge, “Hey, hey, Reeds, I need you here with me, okay? Just stay awake long enough until we get to the shack and we’ll clean you up.”
“I’ve...I’m losing a lot of…” Blood. Blood was what you wanted to say. But the adrenalin was wearing out. Your shoulder throbbed horribly. Exhaustion weighed you down and placed inconvenient black spots in your vision.
“I know.” He draped your good arm over his shoulder and kept you upright. “I know, we’ll get there. I promise.”
There was no arguing with him. You were soaked to the bone and in a hell of a lot of pain. Going back to the shack was your best bet in this horrid weather.
Jake continued to support your weight as the two of you followed the same coordinates leading back to the shack—or rather you haze inaudible directions of what you could remember from the information Norm had given you while Jake haphazardly followed.
Thankfully, the rest of the way wasn’t a long journey. Or maybe you just kept blacking in and out along the way, you didn’t know.
Jake and you stumbled through the door of the shack. He closed the door while you made your way to the radio with whatever strength you had left.
“Norm.” You tapped the radio while wincing. The pain in your shoulder was getting worse. Before now you had been tolerating it. “Norm, can you hear me?”
The static went on.
“Storm must be messing with the signal,” Jake said from behind you as he rummaged through the shack. “We should stay here until the storm settles—”
You rested your head against the small table, the rest of his words becoming nothing but muffled noise to your ears. God, you’ve lost so much blood. And you were so tired.
For a moment, just for a few seconds, you wanted to sleep. Only for a moment.
“Reeds.”
A larger hand rested on the back of your neck, bringing you slightly out of your unconsciousness.
Jake kept calling your name. “Hey, where’s the med kits at? We need to work on your arm, okay? And I need you to stay awake. Can’t have you unlinking in this condition.”
Sluggishly, you nodded, “They’re in the cabinets.”
More thunder rolled by. Jake left your side briefly to search through the cabinets above you. You leaned back in your seat, staring bleakly up at the ceiling.
“How long do these storms last?” You asked.
The thunder responded with a clap.
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sorry for the long wait! hopefully it was all worth the wait. another 8k chapter, yay, that wasn't difficult to write at all lol! but now jake and reeds are alone in a shack. anything could happen....
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(i'm not adding anymore people anymore!)
taglist: @doggyteam2028 @bigbootahjudy @innercreationflower @n7cje @celi-xxmoon @readerofallthingss @sillyblues @squirtlebob @saturnhas82moons @1mawh0re @aprosiacperson @loserwithnofriends @garfieldsladybird @slutforsmut4ever @lik0
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strangererotica · 7 months ago
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EXPLICIT CONTENT | MINORS DNI
Stepdad!Hopper x Reader • age gap (reader is 21, Hop’s in his 40’s) • angst, mutual pining, masturbation mentioned, troubled marriage, Hopper is a pervert wracked with guilt aka my favorite kind of Hopper… 🤪
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You wiggled on Hopper’s lap, causing him to stifle a groan. God you were beautiful. So fucking pretty and sweet, using his lap to sit in while you did your makeup at the dresser mirror.
“Thanks for the boost, by the way,” you told him, smiling at his serious reflection in the glass. “I’m too short for this dresser, I swear.” You giggled, patting your cheeks with a rosy blush. “If it weren’t for you, I’d be stretching on my tiptoes just to put my makeup on.”
Hopper swallowed back another groan as you adjusted on his lap. “But with you in this chair, and me on your lap-” You finished slicking your lips with a cherry-flavored gloss, and popped them. “-We make a great team, don’t we?”
Hopper forced a polite smile back at you, struggling internally. He shouldn’t be enjoying this so much, or doing it at all. You were so trusting of him, so naive in many ways. Even though you were an adult now, Hopper was aware of the fact that you had next to no experience with boys. He wasn’t doing anything wrong right now, by letting you sit on his lap…not technically. But because of the feelings he’d secretly had for you, for awhile now, even the most innocent gestures Hopper made toward you felt taboo…
When he’d met your mother, you’d just turned nineteen. And without an older, stable male figure in your life, you became attached to Hopper quickly. After marrying your mother the following year, Hopper hoped you’d finally begin dating, forming relationships with boys your age. But now, at twenty-one years old, you still insisted on designating Hopper the only man in your life.
He hadn’t minded, at first. Not when his relationship with your mother was going well, when she and Hopper were still being intimate together. But things had soured between them over the last six months or so, to the point that now, Hopper couldn’t remember the last time he and his wife had made love. There never seemed to be any interest on her part, leading Hopper to wonder sometimes if perhaps she were having her sexual needs met by another man?
With the tension in his marriage at a peak and its intimacy completely evaporated, Hopper found his desires traveling elsewhere in the home. He hated himself for it, despised the way he came almost daily to the thought of having you…but the woman you’d become was a temptation too great for Hopper to ignore.
Seeing you every morning, moving about the house in just your pajama shorts and a tank top like it was nothing, Hopper realized how disgusting he’d truly become. You obviously trusted him, just as you had for years, enough to prance around him half naked and think nothing of it. This realization only added to Hopper’s guilt, making him hate himself a little more each time he masturbated with your body in mind.
“There,” you said, capping your mascara and placing it on the dresser. “All done. What do you think?” You fanned your fingers around your face and batted your lashes dramatically, smiling at Hopper’s reflection.
“Beautiful,” he replied; and from the almost reverent sincerity in Hopper’s tone, you knew he meant it.
You slid off his lap, his hands immediately moving to your hips to steady you as you dismounted. Hopper rose from the chair, turning aside so you wouldn’t see him discreetly adjust himself in his pants.
He sighed with relief, feeling as if he’d passed some kind of test. “Hey,” he said. “You really do look great, kid. But-.” Hopper moved his finger to boop your powdered nose. “-Who’s all this for, anyway? You gettin’ all dolled up just for the hell of it?”
You glanced down at the floor, a blush warming your cheeks beneath the makeup. “I…uh,” you stammered bashfully. “I have a date.”
Hopper’s eyebrows lifted, his lips parting in surprise. “A date?” he asked, before quickly softening the accidental sharpness in his voice. “Oh. Who’s the lucky guy?”
There was a pause before you answered Hopper, and he found it a bit strange that you didn’t answer him right away. Maybe you were just shy, he wondered? This was the first date Hopper had ever known you to have, in the two years he’d known you. Maybe the situation was so new, you didn’t know how to talk about it casually?
“Uh, just a guy from work,” you explained. “You’d like him, he’s funny. But serious too, when he needs to be.” You bit your glossy bottom lip, chuckling. “He kinda reminds me of you, Hop.”
Your stepdad’s eyebrow quirked curiously, as if he doubted your sincerity. “Hmm,” he muttered. “You meeting this guy somewhere?”
“At the new mall they just built, yeah,” you replied, checking your look again in the mirror. “We’ll probably see a movie, or something.”
Hopper nodded, another polite smile once again fixed onto his face. “Well, be safe,” he told you, and gently squeezed your shoulder before heading for the door.
“Just, one more thing,” Hopper said, lingering in your doorway. “What’s this kid’s name, anyway?”
You froze outwardly, but your mind was scrambling for a response. “Jack,” you blurted. “His name’s Jack. He’s a nice guy, really.”
Hopper’s brow was creased in ‘detective mode,’ a familiar expression for him, but one you rarely saw directed at yourself. He nodded silently as he exited your room, patting the doorframe on his way out. You watched Hopper leave, exhaling the knot of tension you’d been holding.
“Like I said,” he called from the hallway as he walked away. “Be safe.”
Be safe. A sentiment that struck you as both ironic and unnecessary, as you observed your made-up reflection in the mirror…the mirror you could easily access, without having to strain. You hadn’t needed Hopper’s lap to boost you; you wanted him to be there. The innocence you feigned around your stepfather was as fake as your date for the evening, Jack.
The truth, which as always is more complicated than fiction, was that you’d been in love with Hopper for awhile now. You weren’t as naive as he (and your mother) thought you were. What you lacked in actual life experience, you made up for in observing others. And as you began to see problems in your mother and Hopper’s marriage arise, you watched each crack form on the surface with a growing interest.
Although Hopper didn’t realize it, your choosing him as the only man in your life was not an accident. You didn’t want anyone else; you wanted him. Tonight had been a test, to gauge his reaction to you actually having a date for once. And from the way Hopper had reacted, his change of tone, his sudden and deliberate need for details, you were convinced that jealousy was at play in his response.
Reaching for your bag, you checked to make sure you had your car keys and enough cash on you for a movie ticket and some popcorn. You’d go to the mall and see a movie, just as you’d told Hopper, minus a date…
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…or at least, you thought you’d be going alone. You didn’t notice, as you exited the driveway and drove through the streets of Hawkins, that another (very familiar) vehicle was discreetly following a few cars behind you.
Hopper wasn’t going to miss the opportunity to see, with his own eyes, the boy you’d suddenly, uncharacteristically, made the choice to go out with. The expression ‘know your enemy,’ may have been resting at the back of Hopper’s mind as he followed you to the mall; but more accurately, Hopper was hoping to know his competition…
PART TWO
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stargirlrchive · 2 years ago
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ocean eyes: chapter three ✩ jake sully
masterlist ⋆ ˚。⋆୨୧˚ ocean eyes masterlist
summary: widow!jake sully x female!reader, 10 year age-gap. jake is lowkey sunshine <3 reader is grumpy! arranged marriage/marriage of convenience, eventual smut, arguing, Jake being a flirt, that’s all + wc - 2,424
comments: part three lovers, reader x ronal interactions are my fav to write fr so this was fun, also i know this has been more reader!centric as opposed to reader x jake but just wait ;) chapter four is literally my favorite from the whole series i am so excited, kk bye <3
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⋆ ˚。⋆୨୧˚
You walked into the marui, Tsireya instantly running into your arms as she cried. The younger girl was at times too sensitive for you. Still you wrapped your arms around her, pulling her closer, “Are you okay?”
“Yes syulang, I am fine. Calm down.”
She took a deep breath, removing herself as she looked over you once more. Her ears pinned back roughly in fear as her mother entered their home. “You are so irresponsible!”
You huffed out an annoyed breath, removing Tsireya from you as you moved deeper into the home. “Yes sister, whatever you say.”
Ronal despised how much you dismissed her, her frustration with your lack of care finally reaching its boiling point. “Tsireya, Ao’nung- out!”
“Sa’nok-”
“Out!”
Both of the younger children scurried away, scared to be caught in the crossfire. “You have no regard for anyone but yourself! You are so careless! Stupid girl!”
“I am not a child, Ronal! Stop treating me as such!”
“No, you are far worse! You behave worse than any child I have ever raised!”
Your anger was rising quickly, causing the deepest throb to pound on your temple, ringing angrily in your ears. “I do not know what you want from me sister. When I was younger you wanted me to step out of my shell, now that I am happy, doing as I please you find issue in it. You find issues in everything I do!”
“Yes because you are too wild, you do not understand responsibilities because Tonowari and I have let you run amuck for far too long!”
An angry hiss left your lips, “How many times do I have to tell you? You are not my mother! I was fifteen when you took me in, I had accomplished my Iknimaya well before you began to acknowledge my existence again. I do not need you to mother me!”
Ronal was not sure when her relationship with you got this way, when had your strings tangled so horribly that neither of you recognized the other? Unwilling to see eye to eye. “You have changed so much from when you were a child. I do not recognize you.”
Despite wanting it to, her words hurt you. “You choose not to see me. Refuse to acknowledge that I want to be my own person.”
“Being your own person entails you to be selfish? You hurt the people that care for you! And if that is who you are, then no. I refuse to get to know this new person.”
Selfish.
Her words stung, all you wanted was the attention she ripped away from you when she left your home. You missed her terribly, and since then never found your place with her again. “You will continue to fight this, but know you will be mated. Whether that is with JakeSully or someone else. But I will make sure of it, I want you out of my home as soon as possible.”
Hot tears instantly fell from your eyes and this time it was Ronal who walked out on you.
Jake nervously made his way to his family’s marui, his palms were sweating uncomfortably as he thought of how he should bring up the subject with his children. It had been a few years since Neytiri had left their life, and though they had learned to live without her, he wasn’t sure how they’d take the news.
Worried he’d need to make arrangements for them to leave once more. He sighed quietly, nerves bubbling in his chest as he walked in. His youngest, Tuk, instantly ran into his arms. “Sempul, you’re back!”
He scooped her up in his arms, smiling as she clung to him, “Told you I would be back quickly.”
He moved deeper into the home before setting her down, “Sully meeting, fall in.”
All his kids crowded around him, curiosity filling them as they saw their father fidget with nerves. “You know back in the forest, as Olo’eyktan I needed to make decisions that benefited the clan?”
He was answered by nods, “Well-Tonowari has the same responsibility as I do. He must make decisions with the assistance of the Tsahik, to make sure the safety of their people is ensured.”
Tuk’s lower lip wobbled, “Have they changed their mind?”
Jake instantly brought her into him, flattening her hair as he tried to soothe her. “No babygirl, but they have asked something of me. And I have agreed. But-”
He let out a deep breath, “If you all do not want me to, I can back out and we will take our leave once again.”
Lo’ak was the one to ask, “What do they want, sir?”
“They need to be sure that I am loyal to the clan, that just as they are welcoming us, we are doing the same. Holding loyalty for if any issue ever came to be they need to know I will stand with them.”
“And how will you do that?”
“By taking a mate.”
He waited with baited breath, trying to memorize the micro-expressions on his children’s faces, “Oh.”
“Like I said-I can back out, and we can leave.”
“I don’t want to leave, Sempul.”
Tuk laid her head on his shoulder before she continued speaking, “I like it here.”
Lo’ak stared at Neteyam, he didn’t know how to feel but he knew his older brother's stance on the matter would be the correct one. His expression was unreadable, “With who, sir?”
Jake’s eyes fell to his oldest, “Ronal’s sister.”
Kiri laughed as Neteyam sucked in a breath, “I heard she’s more reckless than Lo’ak, sir.”
It caused the four of them to laugh, Lo’ak sulking in the corner as his oldest brother teased him. “If you believe it is the right thing sir, we do too.”
Jake let out a quiet breath, sending a smile to his oldest three. “We still have a few weeks to go, give you some time to get used to her, yes? And if any of you change your mind, say the word and we’re gone.”
The night after that slipped away comfortably, and in the quiet of the night when his children were asleep Jake made his way towards the beach. He sank into the cool sand and called upon Neytiri, asking her to give him a sign that this was the right thing to do.
He was about to head back when a small glowing figure in the water came towards him. He instantly recognized the shape. An atokirina.
Jake let out a deep puff of air, a heavy weight lifting from his shoulders as the seed swam around him, his fingers dipped into the water and the atokirina tickled his fingers. After a few seconds it retreated, floating deeper into the water.
⋆ ˚。⋆୨୧˚
You spent the majority of the night tossing and turning, Ronal’s words unable to let sleep come to you peacefully. It was short circuits of bliss, being ripped away by nightmares as her words taunted you. You sighed quietly, the sun barely peeking out by the horizon and you decided it would be best to just start your day. Changing into some of your more comfortable pieces of clothing, deciding to take a quick swim before fetching the Olo’eyktan.
You tiptoed out quietly, not wanting to wake anyone. Once you stepped out of the marui, your pace increased. Your feet digging into the warm sand as you sighed quietly.
You could tell by the tides that the day would be beautiful. Your feet dipped into the water before diving in.
The coolness shocked your senses awake and you couldn't help the giddiness that nestled into your chest. You swam deeper into the freshwater, a small laugh leaving your nose as one of the ilu’s nuzzled their head against your own. You signed to the animal, ‘Hello.’
The animal clacked back at you, only swimming backup to feel the warmth of the sun. Your eyes locked on the blur of dark blue, hands on his hips as he watched you. Your eyes rolled slightly, dipping back into the water to swim for a bit.
Jake’s day had started early too but unlike you the Toruk Makto was well rested. He laughed quietly when he noticed you turned away from him, dipping into the water once again. He decided to wait, he did not have much to do besides learning whatever it is you need to teach him.
Nearly ten minutes had passed and Jake was starting to feel a bit foolish, thinking you must have swam away. He sighed quietly going to turn around and head back to his marui but you reappeared once again. “Well, come in.”
Your voice dripped with annoyance, Jake once again found joy in how he pushed your buttons despite barely knowing you. His feet were moving quickly into the water, it was cold, shocking his senses and it caused a shiver to run down his back. His teeth began to clank roughly the closer he got to you, and it caused a laugh to rip from your throat. “Is the water too cold for you, Toruk Makto?”
“Just a bit.”
“Well, you better get used to it. I enjoy getting my chores done early in the morning.”
Your jabs did nothing to his ego, he enjoyed it actually, “Very well. Do me.”
Your mouth dropped in shock, eyes narrowing in on him as you splashed him with the cold water, “Stupid man!”
“You called me a chore, so let’s get it done.”
You huffed quietly, turning away from him before clicking your tongue softly, an ilu rising from the water. The docile animal nuzzled its head against your hand, chirping happily at the attention, “This is an ilu.”
“Really?”
You looked back at him, throwing him an angry glare. “Go on, mount her.”
“Can we go ahead and skip to the Tsurak?”
You rolled your eyes, “No we cannot. They are very difficult animals to tame and you are not ready.”
That jab did annoy Jake, only a bit, but still. He scoffed quietly, “I claimed a Toruk, I can tame a Tsurak.”
Maybe it was your annoyance with the whole situation, with your sister and Tonowari, with the man next to you, but you wanted to see him fail. You wanted to rub it into his face that he was in fact, not ready. “Very well, Jake Sully.”
He was a bit suspicious at your willingness to oblige but decided against commenting on it, excited to show off to you. “Either way, the Tsurak do not swim by here, you need to mount an ilu so we can get there.”
You swiftly connected your queue to an ilu that was swimming by, mounting the animal with ease. Jake followed your motions, feeling the strength of the animal course through him. You said nothing else, only moving forward through the water. He was glad you were ahead of him, you missed the way his body jolted roughly as the animal began to move. Maybe he was getting a bit ahead of himself, but he was never one to back down from a challenge.
The swim to the Tsaruk was quiet, the only noise was the sound of the water crashing against your bodies. You cut the Tsaheylu bond, diving into the water for a brief second before coming back up.
“We are here. Off.”
Jake tried his best to follow your motions, but dismounting his ilu was far less graceful than yours. It was only for a brief second but he felt nerves bubble in his chest. “Since it is only the two of us, I will need your help to catch one. Which will only make this all the more difficult for you.”
“Thank you for your words of encouragement.” His words dripped with sarcasm, and it caused your eyes to roll. “I am not here to coddle you. I am here to teach.”
Jake said nothing else, just watching you swim by the animals, “Much like your bird, a skimwing will pick you. By trying to attack you, so be ready.”
In the next instant you were swimming away from Jake and he was surrounded by the large animals. The majority of them scattered away, only nipping in his direction lightly before leaving. But there was one, larger than most, that began to circle Jake, nipping harshly in his direction. Jake’s ear barely missed and his heart started to thump roughly against his chest. “Okay! Now you must grip on the handle, and use the rope to tie yourself to the animal!”
You had begun to swim towards Jake, ready to pounce on the animal to deter it from thrashing around. Jake listened to your instructions, gripping tightly onto the handle before throwing half his weight on. The animal trashed around, screeching in annoyance as Jake tried to wrap his wrist. You jumped on the animal's lower end, trapping its lower wings between your legs, “Hurry up!”
Jake grunted in exhaustion, he was not as lean as he had once been, the task proving to be more difficult than he liked. With a final wrap of his wrist, Jake threw his leg over the animal, “Go!”
You released the animal's wings and he was off in the next instant, “Let your legs fall flat against him before you dip back into the water!”
Jake tried to follow your instructions, after easily positioning himself when the animal took flight, but he lost his footing when dipping into the water. The leather strap unwrapped from his wrist as he got dragged deeper and deeper. He felt the sting as he finally released his hand, swimming up quickly to try and fill his lungs with air. “Fuck!”
He raised his hand, it was raw with cuts, throbbing aggressively in his palm.
“Are you alright?” Your voice was dripping with your amusement, you weren't even trying to hide the smile on your face.
“Peachy.”
Your face scrunched up in confusion, not understanding the word that fell from his mouth. After calming down he looked at you again, his eyes glossed over a bit as the sun glimmered off the teal of your skin.
Jake could not place what it was, but he wanted to impress you. He felt the need to prove himself to you. Maybe it was the way you were unwilling to bend the knee to anyone’s will and he enjoyed the challenge. So the words slipped off his tongue as he watched you, “Again.”
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