#wheel wank

[wisteriagoesvroom]

idk i personally think car no. 4 and car no. 81 aren't that far apart. this might be a bit of a rant (sorry) but despite the h2h in quali and if u look at their q3 lap times, their usually like maybe a tenth or so apart. its a bit misleading due to some mistakes either of them make on their final laps, or one car being more upgraded than the other, but wtv. but i feel like theyve been getting compared a lot recently bc car no. 4 still makes some rookie mistakes, while car no. 81 doesn't exactly make those (hence the 100% completion of laps in every race). i still think car no. 81 lacks consistency, and he isn't as consistent as people say (for example the start of the season was rocky, did great in the european leg/mid season and then lowkey flopped). but like hes not rlly far off car no. 4, i think its just his quali laps and sometimes tyre deg that gets him mostly (which is what most new drivers struggle with, like what we're gonna see with 6 rookies this year!) and going on the 4 vs 81 comparison, it's lowkey kinda forced. 4 is better than 81, and should be better than 81 bc he has 4 more years of race experience + 2 more years with the team. idk if mclaren would be permanent for 81 bc 4 has already pretty much solidified his spot as the 'golden boy' like max has at rbr, and have the team built around them. but then again idk where 81 would go. rant ova i got bored sry

i rly got nothing to add except that this is a very valid take. and my prediction (which nobody asked for) is that oscar by the time his contract expires in 26 might be heading to a different team where he is very clearly the lead driver, and has the confidence to openly fight for a WDC because he’ll also be experienced enough by then. i also believe in the kimi r theory when it comes to their ages 😂 so 2028… it’s all in the plan…

(logically there’s so many dependencies like car and regs and what can happen between now and two more years so who. even. knows)

[louferrignojrofficial]

buddie scenes in an episode ≠ a good episode. it’s crazy how some people watch buck and eddie have scenes together and then they loved the episodes and have little to no questions about the logic or the actual storylines. it’s just all a path to buddie canon and about how they are in love with each other.

[onaperduamedee]

Hey, WoT fandom, it's not bad writing; it's an adaptational choice you don't agree with

[fandom-hoarder]

hellers proving Sam is the third wheel: look at this contextless image cropped from the show where sam isn't even in frame because we cropped him out or it was a tight POV shot

wincesties proving Cas is the third wheel: IT'S LITERALLY IN THE TEXT. CAS CALLS HIMSELF THE THIRD WHEEL

(For reference, cas IS in this scene in prophet and loss 😅)

Multishippers:

[ayrennaranaaldmeri]

you know the god!Gale cope has reached all new levels of cringe when people will write essays about how tara is a secretly evil emissary of mystra sent to oppress gale and spy on him and decide that his mother bullies him too for like no fucking reason.

[wisteriagoesvroom]

Re: second driver thing. Omg I need Oscar to get faster solely bc it’s narratively more entertaining. No fun if they’re not fighting

Tbh I didn’t even pay attention to Oscar at alll until after the season was over so imagine my shock seeing the discourse. I didn’t know there Oscar had that many haters. Is it even that serious… and the worst are the LN4 fans😭 I like Lando and he’s objectively faster but isn’t it in their best interest to somewhat respect Oscar’s skills so that it’s actually impressive Lando is destroying him🤷‍♀️ if Oscar’s as bad as they say (& I’ve seen several say he did nothing for the WCC like Jesus)— then Lando beating him isn’t that remarkable is it🤔

// wheel wank

this isn’t necessarily the point you were making, but i will say this: zak brown and co have done an incredible job with the mclaren rebrand because if you look at the historical record. like. this is not the “twinks hug it out and get along” team. this is a “we get the best drivers and they eventually fight it out for a championship because having two great people with extraordinary capabilities pushing each other to the limit is how we win” team.

the sport has changed since previous eras, absolutely! the way drivers navigate the PR side and inter-team relations of it too. there is no singular way of having a winning mentality. but i do think as oscar continues refining his skill and levelling up (which is not an entirely linear process but i believe he has it in him otherwise I wouldn’t be so oscarpilled), we may see more moments like hungary or challenging calls from the pit wall or a different kind of manoeuvring when it comes to affirming driver priority from the so-called oscarcamp, even if that changes from race to race etc.

hungary and baku etc, even singapore and other races towards the second summer break were, kind of, tests. portents of what to come or thrillingly exciting developments, in some ways it’s both. in a way, 81’s less even performance esp in the americas races mean we didn’t see that come to a head yet. like i don’t want the partnership closeness between 4 and 81 to end either, but it’s not professional sport without some level of rivalry and it will inevitably evolve and it probably already has, but that’s between them and that’s why im here writing rpf instead of idk like messaging them about it or whatever.

maybe these two will defy the narrative 🤷🏻‍♀️ i have no idea what that teammate dimension eventually looks like. but i will definitely be around to watch.

[balrogballs]

Balls you know that rumor that Tolkien tried writing something explicit but he thought it was so bad he locked it away and Tolkien Estate is trying to pretend it doesn’t exist?? Who do you think the couple that got official Tolkien smut could’ve been

Thank you for this enlightening question.

My first thought was either Celedriel or Celrond, for the greatest self-insert potential, considering they’re both Very Married Couples. Or if we’re going by his own self-professed self-insert, potentially Beren and Lúthien. Aragorn and Arwen is another possibility, but even in the Appendix story, Elrond is a bit of a third wheel/gooseberry in this context, so it would have been a bit too much like having the Eye of Sauron on your ass.

Now, if the Tolkien Estate is pretending it does not exist, that leads me to hope pray think that there’s some nasty fucking going on, or fucking that Tolkien himself must have considered nasty. Because the Estate doesn’t seem too opposed to sexual connotations in general, considering Arwen and Aragorn spent the entire original trilogy fucking through their clothes and the Hobbit films had Kili as somewhat of a Casanova figure, in the only film I remember from said trilogy. They may not have approved as such, but neither were they censored, as far as I remember.

My theory is this: it is not a sexual union as such being portrayed. It is, instead, an act of self love.

It is Fëanor, having a wank, ass out under Starlight.

Is this particularly nasty? No. But keep in mind this is the man who did, in fact, write LaCE. So I don’t think Galadriel and Thuringwethil are joining their pussies in union any time soon. So, my theory is that it’s Fëanor having a sad, angry wank alone in his studio. There may have been some hammer/other tool insertion going on.

This too, the Estate may have had an issue with. After all, and I don’t remember much about Fëanor’s hammer or the TV show’s portrayal of it, but I distinctly recall Charles Edwards’ fingers curling comfortably around it. It’s not necessarily a continuity error, but it certainly does make one wince in hindsight, thinking about where the hammer had been. Or even forgetting the show. Does it sit in Formenos still? Is it a museum exhibit? Or a trinket in a market stall? Or, Valar forbid, has it been turned into a public relic, much like a lucky-stone or wishing-well, that passerby touch to ensure good luck and skilful crafting? Has it been cleaned? Do the Noldor in Aman know about sterilisation? Do the Noldor in Aman know about sterilisation?

I digress. I feel like Fëanor touching himself would make perfect sense. He is, after all, a tortured artistic genius. Spending hours in his workshop, thanklessly working on his craft. In a way, the written word is like a Silmaril. Three Silmarils. Three LotR books. Perhaps dear Fëanor got a little kinky with it. Perhaps there was some ballbusting involved. Perhaps the hammer, or some other crafting tool, makes a reappearance in this regard. I am certain it was lovingly described, with a worrying degree of realism.

One day, I will find it.

[hbosscreations]

I've sat on this for several days, because your analysis makes me feel feelings as a theater gay, and I think that you touch on exactly why Ride the Cyclone gets to have this conversation and Spirit World (and other modern comics don't).

Marketability.

People like to act like musicals are 'super niche' and not something that the average person will engage with, but that's not really the issue here, the issue is money. Musicals can make bank if they take off. Anything that makes it to a major stage production can generally be assumed to be raking in enough cash to pay everyone back and then some, and musical theater people will promote and encourage people to see the show no matter the cost.

Theater people are drama llamas. We LIKE laughing, crying, and being made to think after a show. A theater person will talk about their favorite show for years. Will see it as many times as their wallets will allow, and there's money to be made in a big enough production.

Ride the Cyclone gets to talk about death and sex and teenage pain because musical theater is allowed to be a vehicle to tell meaningful stories. When you go see a show like Ride the Cyclone, you're there BECAUSE it's about a bunch of teenagers begging to be brought back to life.

It doesn't necessarily matter if the show makes millions of dollars either, because in this day and age small acting companies record things and put them on youtube and use things like patreon and kickstarter to fund passion projects. Starkid is my favorite example of this. The passion is a huge part of it, and marketing allows theaters to make their money back.

Comics in the two major companies DC and Marvel though, have an industry that has been poorly managed since at least the 90s. Can't speak for creators like Image or IDW or whatnot, but I can tell you that the balancing act for DC and Marvel to try and make money has been TERRIBLY run and managed for a long time. Margins are pretty thin on traditional comics.

Which means they need to sell lots of stuff, pay their employees less, and cash grab as much as possible. It's why event comics are so common, why tie-ins are so prevalent, and even why they don't bind all the tie-ins together a lot of the time when they put collections together.

DC wants to make maximum profit, and that means making their stuff as bland as they can to appeal to as many people as possible, not realizing they are shooting themselves in the foot.

John Constantine is a fantastic example of this problem. He's in every crossover they can stick him in, because he's a cool character and he's fun to play with, but he's never treated with the dignity and depth his early comics demand. Why? I think it's because most of DC's current audience is American and they are afraid of alienating anyone by choosing a side on anything, and therefore not getting their money.

God forbid the horror comic series about a queer, burned out punk, a man who fully believed in the principles he stood behind but never had the ability or drive to try and make them happen, be about politics and queer topics. We cannot stand for anything or we risk sales being bad. We can't talk about real world topics, people don't want to read that in their escapist fantasy, even though different people get different things out of the concept.

I actually think that's a big reason Dead in America is suffering. It's not ABOUT anything. We could have had a discussion about racism that the earlier issues so CLEARLY wanted to talk about, but we might risk upsetting someone who reads the comics, that's why we have so many 'rural' stories about bad white people in the run. 'Rural whites' don't read comic books, after all (It's bullshit, but their numbers will show this, because people like me who live in rural areas have to get comics from ebay or from a reseller website because we don't have local options). We could have talked about John's complicated feelings about fatherhood, but that might hurt someone's feelings. We could talk about queer topics, but...well, that I'll blame on Spurrier not knowing or caring about queer culture.

It's why the New 52 and Rebirth stories are...not great. They're the aesthetic of Hellblazer and John Constantine, but they don't have any of the bite that the original run has. I have read the OG Hellblazer twice now and there are comics I am HAUNTED by in the best way. I can't think of many stories that have come out in recent years that have done the same thing.

Xanthe, as you've mentioned in another post, is a very generic 'asian' character in design. I didn't realize this at the time, but once you pointed it out I couldn't not see it anymore. Their character isn't really risky at the time of publication. Their backstory seems made to make numbers on tumblr, the relationship with their family only exists for screenshots to get people talking and buying. I bought it for Constantine, but also because I was pulled in by the dinner scene and Xanthe seemed interesting from the few panels we got.

And this HURTS characters like Xanthe when it comes to future appearances. I remembered Spirit World fondly because it was bland and harmless, but I read it once when the trade came out and never read it again until your post about it because it was bland and not actually engaging. My memories were fond, but I didn't think about it. It had no longevity or real thought to the world-building it wanted to create. Pretty art, lots of action (too much action), no real substance.

This story should have been Xanthe's debut instead of a crossover/teamup, detailing their cast roster, setting up future antagonists and potential enemies to become allies. It should have been about a person trying to rationalize being alive and dead at the same time and what that means, it should have talked about what death meant culturally.

Being Asian-American and having that dynamic around death would be an interesting deep dive on its own that might have fueled more readership. Instead, it seems to have left the target demographic ambivalent at best and unwilling to engage further at worst.

Why was Cassandra Cain in the story? She's Asian. Why was John Constantine in the story? He's queer. Neither character felt well written on the second read through, and more to the point, they were superfluous (and frankly I find it a little insulting that someone at DC went, well, she's popular and Asian, throw her in there).

And you're right. Xanthe will show up in team books occasionally they were in an issue of Birds of Prey recentish, but they were also paired with Constantine again. They'll be background art, they might even die in an event if they get a decent fan following specifically so they can be brought back in a super special single edition, and then be forgotten for a while.

It's a shame, because if Spirit World had the love and care to the themes it claimed to the way Ride the Cyclone did, maybe Xanthe could have been the flagship character for a new generation of readers, but we'll never know now.

I don't think I've treaded any new territory here, everything I've said, you've said better and far more succinctly, but I definitely understand your perspective better now. Apologies for the long, long rant.

Spirit World, Ride the Cyclone and Death. A weird comparative analysis

Gonna combine my musical nerd and cape comics fixation together for a rambling meta thought. I've been reflecting on how taboo the topic of death is in media after getting into Ride The Cyclone (highly recommend watching the slime tutorial and Waiting in the Wings' documentary on it) but also contrasting that musical with how Spirit World handled similar topics.

Both stories cover characters whose lives were cut short from a tragic circumstance, but while Cyclone directly talks frankly about how each character uniquely grieves over their lost life (and eventually accepts death)- Spirit World uses death as largely an aesthetic to a generic fantasy superhero adventure.

[spoilers for Ride the Cyclone and Spirit World]

Spirit World is about non-binary, half dead half living Envoy Xanthe Zhou, as they go into the Spirit World with John Constantine to rescue Cassandra Cain Batgirl. They eventually go toe to toe with the spirit of a bitter dead poet.

Ride the Cyclone is about 6 choir teenagers who die in a roller coaster accident in their small town. In the afterlife, they are given the chance to vote which one of them they believe should be resurrected.

For Spirit World, do we even know how Xanthe feels about being "half dead"? What does that even mean? They died as (what looks like) a 3 year old, and have clearly aged 15 more years since then. So they can age? Do they need to eat or drink (they're seen with a drink in a Pride comic)? Xanthe keeps mentioning they're half dead and half living, but the comic doesn't seem to want to discuss what that means. How would Xanthe feel that they were essentially given a job as an Envoy the minute they died as a very young child? Was this even a choice?

We've already covered the numerous plot holes in Xanthe Zhou's poorly thought out backstory so I won't go over that again. But honestly apart from the thematically loose "the dead shouldn't be forgotten" moral, a lot of how death is presented in Spirit World feels so superficial. When Xanthe is formally introduced as this cool character with a giant sword hanging around a gravesite, fighting all these hopping vampire creatures... this scene would play out the same if you swapped the setting with a forest and zombies as bad guys.

The Spirit World is less an afterlife for the spirits to move onto and more an MMORPG setting for our superheroes to travel across and fight generic evil beings and encounter eviler, bigger, boss battles at the end. Then there's the poet clout villain whose problems are just easily solved by Xanthe promising to remember her. I've already covered what a lost opportunity thematically this character was in my last Xanthe essay, but this time I want to contrast her with Ride the Cyclone's Jane Doe. I also want to compare Xanthe with Noel Gruber afterwards.

Ride the Cyclone's musical numbers follow each character performing a song reflecting their wishes, and musings on life (this sounds depressing but the musical handles all this with comedy and wit), hoping to prove themselves as worthy of a second chance at life. Of the characters, Jane Doe is the mysterious odd one out. The accident decapitated her, leaving her to enter the after life with no memories and the people of the living unable to identify her.

You might see where I'm going with this. So in Spirit World, Wan Yujing was this famous poet mourned by an entire empire. She only goes monster mode when a handwave-y "time erodes all" happens in the Spirit World and she is eventually forgotten- so she becomes desperate to demand to be reincarnated by the Jade Court. Because her clout ran out. Again, I already made the critique in my previous essay that this villain would better link to our protagonist if she was a queer poet whose poetry was being purposefully straight washed as an act of queer historical erasure. But I want to bring up how truly unsympathetic this villain is. She gets Shakespeare levels of clout but still demands more because she isn't getting reincarnated fast enough. Xanthe promises that as an immortal "half dead half living" person that they will remember Wan Yujing, so she too can be immortal in some way.

I think about all the Jane Doe-s in the Spirit World who don't get to be famous poets that have Empires remembering who they were. People who died anonymously without a past. In Cyclone, the main character chooses Jane Doe as the person who should be brought back to life. Our cast of teens come to terms with the fact that while it's tragic that their lives ended shortly, they conclude "to say that if one dies young, they die needlessly... that is to discount the years we had. We had a life, she didn't. That's my vote." Since Jane Doe has no memory of who she is, it's only fair that she is given that second chance.

I get that Spirit World is choosing these "larger than life" characters as villains, but it's at the expense of their own supposed themes. Of all the people to die and face off our hero as the villain, a character who's essentially an influencer but somehow has an entire empire forget about her anyway feels thematically hollow.

Modern Superhero comics are suffering from a specific problem right now; they're not really about anything. Characters don't feel like people with interior lives informed by the context of who they are. Class, race and bigotry are only touched upon as lightly as possible. Queer characters are now Pride ads with no personhood or flaws. They punch gentrified crime and fight for no one in particular. Even recent adapted media such as My Adventures with Superman and Caped Crusader follow this. Superman fights white-washed xenophobia, while Batman fights gentrified, white-washed classicism. It's why comics like Superman Smashes the Klan, Catwoman Lonely City and Alan Scott Green Lantern stand out so much. It's been a while since these characters talked about anything that matters. Don't get me wrong, slop that's about nothing exists in every industry. But when these characters and worlds historically used to have more bite- it's especially obvious.

If I could be playfully conspiracy theory-like for a second; I believe Xanthe Zhou was pitched so that DC Comics can buff out their Pride Anthology or AAPI anthology with a new younger character. The company will give this character one limited series, but that's it. Xanthe will appear in the larger DC universe whenever big magic plots happen, but that's it. Maybe they'll get a YA graphic novel. I would love to be proven wrong, but the problems with Xanthe are baked in the dough.

Because they don't feel like a person, Xanthe feels more like an industry planted Pride ad. They're designed to be the most palatable and marketable image of Asian androgyny. They literally have no flaws to grow out of, and their backstory makes no sense. They weren't built to be a sustainable solo character.

So I want to contrast Xanthe Zhou against Noel Gruber from Ride the Cyclone. Because they're both queer characters whose lives were cut short at a young age.

In a dramatic lament, Noel Gruber expresses how if he had a chance to live, he'd want to live the horrible cinematic messy life of a French sex worker woman in post-war France. He struggled as the only gay boy in a small town and never got to kiss a boy before he died. It's a look into a queer life that could've been lived, one with all the messy texture and self destruction Noel couldn't have but desires. We get to see how death and queerness intersect into rich, unflattering, gender-messy themes. "I want to be that fucked up girl." Noel sings.

But what's Xanthe's deal? They died as a 3 year old, got brought back, avoided their family at all costs for 15 years, and then had a transphobic confrontation with their family when they're invited to dinner way later. If Xanthe grew up in a transphobic household, how did they ever figure out they were non-binary when they were 3? Could they even verbalize it? Or did they instead figure out their queerness after they died? But how is that possible when they already held a level of familiar resentment towards their family's transphobia as if they've had several fights about it? It's hard to picture a 3 year old having multiple heated debates about gender with their parents for this level of resentment to make any sense.

Details aside, how does Xanthe's queerness intersect with themes of death and grief? Well, it just doesn't. This scene ends with Xanthe's sister telling them that she bothered remembering them even though their parents moved on from their death (which makes no sense since the parents wanted to have dinner with a random 18 year old they correctly assumed was their long dead "daughter" but whatever). Honestly, the only reason queerness exists in this family drama is so that Xanthe has a tense relationship with their family. The story would be exactly the same if Xanthe was a troublemaker that brought shame to their family. Who they are isn't specific to whatever grief exists in the comic.

When people give the critique that modern Superhero comics aren't about anything anymore, we usually think of these comics as "lacking political bite and commentary". We don't often think of something like Death to be political. And even though it is in many ways, it's also a social taboo to talk about. Death is an uncomfortable thing to confront, even in the safety of fiction. It's what made Ride the Cyclone such a difficult stage musical to market.

So how does a modern mainstream comic like Spirit World fit into that? It just sits there in this non-committal way. Yes, this is a story about a trans teenager who died, but only in a cool Superhero Origin Way, not in any way that would make readers uncomfortable. Bury Your Gays is a stereotype after all, so we can't talk about how queer people feel about death. We don't get to know how Xanthe feels about death as a non-binary Asian American. Especially if it's messy. It's the reason why Wan Yujing's character can never commentate on themes of historical queer erasure. God forbid superhero comics be about something.

I think about how, in the original Hellblazer run from the 80s, John Constantine had an elderly gay friend who was diagnosed with AIDS but was killed by a homophobic hate group. The comic openly talks about the sheer amount of gay people dying of the epidemic, a looming threat that informs John's queer life. It's such a culture shock, to contrast these early comics with how John Constantine is written in Spirit World. A character stripped of his own queer history and is at the mercy of incessant slutty bi jokes. Where is the desire to talk about how death informs a queer person's life? The mourning of a lost generation to the AIDS crisis? Something John lived through?

How about how any of this intersects with being an Asian American queer person? Queer people of color are often erased or purposefully excluded from queer history and communities. As a Queer Asian American, what does it mean to have identities that are often perceived to be in conflict with each other? Would your queer Asian ancestors even be remembered? Cultural differences with how you'd mourn your communities? But answering any of these questions means an uncomfortable conversation for Spirit World. For Xanthe. It threatens to be about something.

Which makes it all the more silly that, of the two stories, a musical about teenagers dying from a rollercoaster malfunction is more willing to have that uncomfortable conversation. You should ride the Cyclone.

[drabbletron]

Hot Wheels: Rodimus X Reader SMUT

|| Here is the guilty wank for Rodimus I promised! It has a lot of angst, which seems to be a trend for how I write him lol My bad, Rod! I just had to do it to him! Enjoy! ||

🔞 MINORS DNI 🔞

https://archiveofourown.org/works/63999109

(It still won't let me post the longer fics. Sorry everyone! Blame tumblr! and the link is still somewhat broken!! yay me!)

[lxvvie]

Simon writes THE best negative yelp/google reviews😂

“Came for a left wheel panel replacement, left with bondo stuck in my car. The 2nd fix was no better. If i wanted sloppy seconds I woulda went to my missus you fucking donkey🖕🏻. 0/5”

“The rice was undercooked and harder than my dick while takin a fucking wank. 1/5”

“Bad infrastructure and car park. Wouldn’t even use this in modern warfare . 1/5”

“Garry the barista, you made my wife uncomfortable AND you gave me ICED sweet tea. Count. Your. Days. 0/5”

“VERY inaccurate website description. A rookie shooting bullets out of his ass would be more accurate than you bloody cunt. 2/5”

“Bloody hell. The food looked like its was drooped, kicked, and shat on by a fucking cow. 0/5”

Y'all leave my Missus™ alone, he wouldn't do this. He probably would and tell you just like he wrote the review lmao.

[valar-did-me-wrong]

I bet the haters of the WOT show would also have called it shit & on WOT tags too..

..exactly how you are doing it rn OP by putting this in ROP tags

I hope you someday understand the unnecessary hate you put out into the world comes back always. And the environment of blind hate that one propagates against a show they don't like, doesn't stay in a vaccum..

I seriously can't believe Prime cancelled The Wheel of Time right after their best season yet. Meanwhile, shit like Rings of Power is still going? Unreal. I thought this kind of shit only happened on Netflix.

Someone better pick it up—HBO, literally anyone—and give it the respect and budget it actually deserves.

[eemamminy-art]

12 and 24 for the ask game! :3

Answering this one like days later haha but I wanted to still do it!

Choose violence ask game

12. the unpopular character that you actually like and why more people should like them

I feel like deciding on a character for this is tough because I mostly like unpopular characters! Or at least, let's say, divisive characters!

But since he's currently the brightest star in my blorbo galaxy, let's talk about Alex. He gets overlooked or even despised because of some of his low hearts dialog-- he's superficial, he's sexist (to both men and women), and he's arrogant. Or so he seems at a glance! But all of that is a facade and far from his true feelings, and if you take even just the slightest bit of time to talk to him, he begins to open up almost immediately. You find out he's insecure, very hard on himself, and spinning his wheels for a dream that realistically can never come true. You find out he has trauma from his abusive dad and his deceased mom, and his grandparents mean well but they haven't exactly prepared him to stand on his own, much as they want him to find his way and find happiness in life. He has a twisted view of what it means to be a man, because he's trying so hard to not be like his father at all costs, but he doesn't know what a well-rounded, well-adjusted man looks like, and falls into toxic masculinity because it's all he really knows how to emulate. He's athletic and he's attractive, so he packs all his self-worth into those things and presses down the inadequacies he feels about his intelligence-- both book smarts and emotional intelligence.

The more you help him find genuine confidence to work on himself, he softens up and apologizes for his prior behavior, and whenever he commits to working on something he damn well means it! He's a character who is putting himself under immense pressure and refusing to ask for help, and thus projecting those feelings outward until someone (the player) can look past the mask he wears and hear out all the worries that have been weighing him down and keeping him stuck in stasis. :3

He's actually really sweet and goofy too. He has some really silly and innocent lines that give him some himbo vibes, but I like to think he's intelligent in his own way. My friend describes him as low INT, high WIS and I think that's apt! When you marry him in-game, he has a lot of dialog where he talks about his feelings and he is very patient and considerate, and I think it's a wonderful bit of character growth! He still talks about how insecure he feels, like he has a line how he wants to "stay in good shape for you", so I wouldn't say that all his problems are solved by a relationship, but I think it does a world of difference for his sense of self worth, and I love to see the growth in him.

After all, if he can see that he's deserving of patience and kindness toward himself, and that it's okay to fail, maybe I can start believing that about myself too. 😊 He's inspirational to me. I'm emotional!! 😩

I like him :3 Just a little bit lol. 220k words and counting kind of little bit.

24. topic that brings up the most rancid discourse

There's so many things that apply to this too lol ship wars... which headcanon is 'more valid'... these are timeworn wank topics but they never seem to dampen even though everyone seems to hate this kind of discourse.

I will say I've gotten better about hyping up people who ship stuff even if I'm not into it, prefacing all my own headcanons with a clear indication that it's my opinion, and if I really gotta complain just keeping it to like, out loud telling my spouse about it. Like just to preserve my mental health, I get so easily wrapped up in debate with people and so often in fandom people just want to be right. Including me! I also want to be right sometimes, it's like in my nature lol (especially when it's something like... factual rather than opinion-based and I have to bring out the receipts from the game script or something) 😫 but being aware of that and choosing to be like 🙂👍 instead makes me feel so much better overall and also makes my fandom experience infinitely better

[summerposts]

𝖘𝖙𝖆𝖗𝖐𝖎𝖉'𝖘 𝖈𝖎𝖓𝖉𝖊𝖗𝖊𝖑𝖑𝖆'𝖘 𝖈𝖆𝖘𝖙𝖑𝖊 𝖕𝖙. 2

mature themes & wording . change wording & pronouns as necessary .

I’m ready to be swept off my feet!

You will not say anything. You will stand there and look as fuckable as you can muster.

You want them to lust for you.

Take their tiny, plump cocks betwixt thy fingers, and they will become your willing slaves.

For only one may leave the mating hole alive. That is the troll way.

Okay. Flirt… fuck… then rip his head off?

Halt! You shall not pass! *winks*

Windless, I blow. Oathless, I take the knee. Handless, I milk the snake. What am I?

Take me to your bedchamber and you’ll find out!

Forget the melons! I’ve got tits!

Can I not marry them both?

Not if you want to wage another war against the church, sire.

I never dreamed I would meet one of Heaven’s stars.

You know I will not ever sleep at night if you leave the light on.

A moth to flame, I’m drawing to this ember.

My want for you is now my pain.

Burn me with your fire.

Let me be your martyr.

Mom, she’s stealing my boyfriend!

It seems I’m wrong no matter what I say.

And that is where you are wrong, my boy!

Oh… I had too much cheese….

You know, I’ve always viewed marriage as a prison.

Marriage with her would not be a prison. The rest of world would be a prison from her cunny!

Oh, wow. That’s the most romantic thing I’ve ever said!

Take a note. Something about a prison! And a … a cunny!

Perhaps you could do with a visit to the vomitorium?

I shall purge my belly of this wine and fill it with the sweet nectar of my lady’s flower.

It’s a wonder he’s been rejected by all of the reputable houses.

I’m just trying to make conversation.

Yes, well, since we are giving advice: speak more gently to someone who could have you broken on the wheel.

I’m not accustomed to having my cleverness matched, or noticed.

Oh, I didn’t notice any cleverness on your part.

Is this the first time you’ve ever told a girl she is pretty? Because you’re making a dreadful mess of it.

What I cannot fathom is how a woman of your wit would find anything remotely alluring about him.

Oh, well, he’s gorgeous… he has a castle.

I of’t forget the castle.

He is the most repulsive man being I have ever met.

He is like his father; spoiled, weak and witless.

Those who would defile the throne, must burn away in the fires of justice.

Has living with pain eroded the last of my fears?

Will it ever after happily?

If it feels like a burden, I know I’m on the right track.

Am I cursed or crazy now?

Looks like someone made some fans tonight. And some enemies, I’m sad to say.

It’s a fuckin’ frog.

You’re doing great, sir! You’re beating them all off!

That’s no frog! That’s a bloody demon!

It would shame me to ask. But … if you commanded it, then I suppose you could carry me.

It’s my pink belly. You… you can rub it if you want. I trust you.

Clever whore!

I do enjoy the chase, but the hour grows late and my sack grows heavy!

Oh, yes! That’s the sweet stink of my lady’s toes!

I’ve always been a foot man. You know that. Everyone knows that.

When I picture her in my mind, I see naught only fire and starlight.

I’ll ready the wanking couch.

It took you all night to dispose of those two dead tramps?

One battle is not a war. You best remember that.

How dare you bring light into my hall!

Are you done, imbecile?

I want you to watch what happens. I want you to watch what I’m doing.

The searing pain within you won’t go away until you watch!

This is where you and your kind belong. Underfoot.

Pain will come before pleasure, and the pleasure will be mine.

Your screams are a fait accompli.

Uh…. EXCUSE ME? Fuck you!

No, no, no, no. Don’t talk to me. I’m in the audience now.

Finish your sad, bullshit story.

Your labor pained me, and I swore to that day that I’d pay you back. So. The time has come.

A breast and a breast upon the chest. Unclasp the button of thy vest. Let me see them tumble free. Let me squeeze them. Lucky me.

If one of you came wearing our hide, we’d sniff you out in an instant. But the manfolk have always been blinded by the soft and supple flesh.

This isn’t a throne room, but a slaughter house!

Let the halls run red with rivers of man-blood, as I flay each and every one of you!

You’ve mistaken the twilight for the dawn, vile thing.

Magic is cruel and exacting. And this magic is my ally.

I don’t want to live your dream anymore!

I like riddles! And I like eating goats! I’m going back to the bridge!

Trolls are afoot and my blade be thirsty!

You can’t win, bitch!

You’ve forgotten your station, beast!

You crept from the shadows, an imposter in the land of light. Well, let me remind you who is master here!

Well, let me remind you who is the master here!

Let me reacquaint you with your fear!

Behold my starlight now.

I know you’re hurting. I’m hurting too.

You can’t see my fury. But I’m furious for you.

My gifts seem small but I give it all.

I was a fool to doubt your worth then.

Perhaps… he smothered himself with that pillow. Who knows? I wasn’t there.

My love will be fierce and your love will be missed.

Evil was vanquished! Vengeance was won!

[starstruckbyacomet]

TLDR: Buck never really fought for ANY of his relationships.

No wonder he was still in a hamster wheel.

The writers wanted to make Buck a victim, who was always left behind by his partners.

But if you examine his relationships closer, he's never made any real efforts to actually know his partners!

You know, sometimes I think we as a fandom completely misjudge Buck when it comes to romantic things. In fanon he's often depicted as this clueless guy who needs to be hit in the face with a pick-up line before he notices someone's advances, but then again he's a really thoughtful and attentive partner who talks about his own feelings freely once he gets into a relationship. And then I look at canon Buck and like. Yeah, no, this is not that.

Buck is really good at picking up on sexual / romantic tension. He flirts constantly and recognises when his flirting is reciprocated. That's how he landed the snake-lady in 1x01, it's how he knew Abby was down for phone sex (or at least wouldn't dump him over bringing it up), it's how he got with Taylor, etc. Buck is good at the flirting part. The only reason he was so awkward around Tommy was that for the first time ever the target of his advances was a man.

He's terrible at gauging where his (more serious) relationships are at though. I doubt that Abby ever thought she'd be with Buck forever. She cared about him, sure, but let's be realistic. I don't think she saw a future where she'd eventually marry him and settle down with him. Buck on the other hand was full on in love with her, waited months and months for her to come back even after she broke off contact. And the hot air balloon ride was a huge gesture, but did he think it through? What if there had been an emergency with Abby's mother while they were up in the air instead of immediately before?

With Taylor I don't think he had any idea where that was going. They were attracted to each other, they had a lot in common and they both really wanted to make it work, but in the end they just weren't compatible. He was really bad at communicating with her, first invited her to that weird double date with Veronica and Albert without being up-front, then the thing with Lucy. And in the end they broke up over something he knew about her all along. He knew Taylor wanted to use the material from when Bobby was high on the gifted brownies back in the day, how was he surprised that this same basic conflict became an issue again?

And Natalia. He had coffee with her once and suddenly "she really [saw him]". Then he turned around and broke up with her because she talked too much the one topic over which they bonded in the first place. Death is her job. You having died is what got the two of you talking. You valued her insight on the topic at some point even. But then you act like it's an annoying hobby she won't stop talking about?

The same with Tommy. How did Buck spend 6 months dating that man - knowing from very early on that the man had issues, that he grew up in a regressive environment, served in the military as well as under Gerrard, came out rather late in life (only a few years ago), doesn't have much family - and then just jump the whole "move in with me, we can get married one day, we can spend the rest of our lives together" on Tommy instead of sitting down and having an open conversation about the future without any heavy expectations? How does he not know a single detail about Tommy's coming out story, about his exes, about what he wants out of this relationship?

Honestly. Buck means well, but he never thinks things through and is kind of a disaster when it comes to actually dating the partner he finds. It's like he's not dating the person, he's dating for the sake of dating.

[aziraphales-library]

Hello dear librarians ! Thanks A LOT for all the work you’re doing for all the merely mortals that love you so much for that ❤️❤️

Can I make a request for a «  praying Crowley » if possible past saison 2 break up? Where we can see Crowley praying to Aziraphale. With or without knowing that the angel listens to him ?

I have done some search for myself. But I am not as good as you … by faaaarr!

So … if you can help me, I would be overjoyed 🥰🥰

Thank you again ❤️

Hi and thank you! Here are some post series two fics in which Crowley prays to Aziraphale...

Mr. Midnight-Rooftop-Boogie-Breakdown by Luciix_66 (G)

That awkward moment when you (demon) leave your ex (not ex, angel) a bunch of drunk texts/voicemail (you're screaming to the heavens at him from the roof and he cant hear you) [or can he????]

consecrated ground by c1rcusfr3ak (NR)

An angel ‘gone native’ that left Earth without a second thought, a demon on his knees in a church, and other such inversions of nature.

What You Had and What You Lost by igoogledyouuh (NR)

When Crowley could feel himself within his body again he was kissing Aziraphale. There was sickening devastation when Crowley opened his eyes to no longer feel Aziraphale’s touch on his shoulder and his cheek and instead the familiar leather of the Bentley’s backseat.

Just Called To Say Fuck You I Love You by Sodium_Azide (E)

Aziraphale discovers that being the Supreme Archangel of Heaven, in Heaven, means that one hears direct prayers. He makes this discovery when a lonely and heartbroken Crowley thinks about his angel during a sad wank session. Evocative imagery, yearning, and visceral appreciation and longing for him do a great deal to bring perspective to an angel who felt cornered into painful choices. Fuck this, he's going home.

i'd come back if you'd just call by johnllauren (T)

Aziraphale chooses to look at Crowley, to peer down into the Earth and check on him. He wonders if Crowley is kneeling somewhere, his hands folded in prayer the human style, a picture of devotion. When Aziraphale looks down upon him, though, this is what he finds: Crowley is sitting in the Bentley, pulled over on the side of the road, bent over the steering wheel, head in his hands, weeping. After Aziraphale leaves, Crowley prays. Aziraphale listens.

Please, please, please, let me get what I want (lord knows it would be the first time) by Middayluna (G)

Crowley was now alone in a world that constantly reminded him that he wasn’t alone that long ago. While drunkenly reminiscing his life from the very beginning, he meanders and finds himself at Whickber Street and prays. Or: the one where a very miserable, heartbroken Crowley prays to Aziraphale.

Prayer for the Lost (and Things that are Left Behind) by ennasthetic (T)

Heaven receives an unlikely prayer. A prayer accountant is having a strange day. ༻❁༺ Or: Crowley is drunk, and heartsick, and hurting, and he does what any human does best when facing off adversity. He prays to Aziraphale.

- Mod D

[olderthannetfic]

OP of the femslash numbers wank ask: I know the people starting the discourse are not the ones writing anything, lol. I’m just saying if more of them would try, their “problem” would be improved… and, imo, if they’re capable of writing paragraphs about the plight of f/f, then they’re capable of writing a short little snippet.

Though your sentiment & osterby’s comment are probably right. A lot of them are more interested in the endless discourse than they actually are in the fanworks orz

--

Haha. If only it were that easy!

I will say, as someone who both writes novels and blither on social media, the latter is something I can churn out in ten seconds between dealing with The Spawn. The former requires concentration and, often, a good night's sleep. It might seem like I can barf out many paragraphs at the drop of a hat, but they aren't the paragraphs I'd most like to be writing.

Still... one does wonder how much more we'd all get done if we spent less time sitting around complaining or spinning our wheels.