#whats wrong with him? no clue!!

[dreamsy990]

drew my dnd character who i made up on the spot the other day because i forgot to prepare anything (his character sheet was online)

turns out the sheet SAID he was a girl but i only read the name nathan and went 'okay thats a dude' so hes trans because i didnt read my own character sheet

[rin-may-1103]

The Wrong Robin Au (part three)

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Danny never said he knew what he was doing, but he thinks he's doing something right if the kid hasn't started crying yet. so you know, that's great. now, he just needed to get the kid out of here, so Danny could have a moment to mourn his retirement plans.

He wasn't going to blame the kid, ancients know Danny would have gone back to hero work eventually. He just couldn't let things go if he could help it, and he could in this situation.

"Alright, here's the plan." Danny announced, slapping his legs as he stood up. "it's late, you're a kid who needs sleep. let's get you home, then we can get a game plan on how to do this."

Tim had been nodding his head, even if it was reluctantly, before freezing in sudden realization. Danny raised his eyebrow in question, wondering what was wrong now.

"you want my help?" Tim asked, absolutely gobsmacked.

Oh, the kid thought Danny was just going to send him away like any reasonable adult would. Ha, Danny wished. but no. He had no clue what he was doing and this kid was his only trump card for making any of the half-assed plans still forming in his head work. AND he had a feeling if he didn't keep Tim close by, the kid would run off and do something stupid.

"Yep," Danny snorted, "you were smart enough to figure out who Batman was, and then you decided to take it upon yourself to help him; whether by convincing me to do it or yourself."

"Now then," Danny said as he walked over to the couch and pulled his hoodie from under Sam. Sam, to her credit, told him to fuck off and went back to snoring. Tucker, somehow having heard her, responded with a 'Go fuck yourself'.

Shaking his head, Danny turned back to Tim. "Let's get going. It's-" Danny turned to look at the clock, his eyes narrowing when he found it; 4 am. The kid was up and coherent enough to try and blackmail someone into being Robin at four in the morning. "-four. you seriously need to get some sleep kid. It's a school night." actually, what day was it???

Tim rolled his eyes but started to follow Danny out the door. "It's Saturday, and I've stayed up longer," he grumbled.

Danny snorted, "So have I, but we still need to sleep." He should probably try and prevent the kid from staying up longer than he should. Danny knows what years of not sleeping properly does to someone. The kid's obsessed with Batman and Robin, right? He'll just use them then.

"Robin needs all the sleep he can get. Otherwise, Batman will bench him. If Robin is benched, then who is out there helping Batman?" That's convincing, right? Does Batman even have the power to bench Robin? From the sounds of it, Robin is his kid's vigilante name. Which means he totally has the power to ground them.

Wait...

If Danny was going to be Robin, does that mean Batman would think he's his kid?

Oh, hell naw. He was not going to be adopted by another fruitloop! If Bruce Wayne even thinks about it, Danny will be out of there so fast even the Flash couldn't stop him.

Tim stumbled, his eyes wide in surprise. "Really?" he asks, turning to look at Danny in horror. Danny blinked, brain failing to remember why the kid would be surprised.

shit, what were they talking about?? Robin... It's four am... Right!

"Yep," Danny chirped, leading the kid to his car. "Now, I know everyone says not to get into a stranger's car and all that jazz, but it's the only way I'm getting you home. So, hop in."

Tim didn't even hesitate to jump into the passenger seat, pulling the seat belt across his chest. Danny stared at him for a second, before opening the car door and sitting down.

"kid, you do know you're not supposed to get into strangers' cars, right?" Danny asked, closing the door and buckling up. Reaching into his pocket, he pulled out his keys and started the engine.

"Well, yeah?" Tim replied, turning to face him, "But you're not a stranger. You're Robin. You protect people not hurt them."

and well? Danny can't argue with that, now, can he?

"Right, fine. Just promise not to get into strangers' cars. I don't care how much you think you know about them. It's not safe, and you could get hurt."

Tim hummed, thinking about it for a moment before nodding his head. "Yeah, alright. I promise."

"good." Danny sighed, turning to look at the road to see if it was clear. then he sighed again, "Don't tell strangers where you live, please."

Tim looked at him in amusement, a small smile spreading across his face. "Drake manor. 1015 Mountain Drive. It's in the Crest Hill community."

"You're killing me here, kid." Danny groaned, hitting his head against the steering wheel. Then he slowly lifted his head and turned to stare at Tim, "Kid. How the hell did you get all the way over here? Mountain Drive is all the way over in Bristol??? That's, like, twelve miles outside of city limits?"

"I have my ways."

Danny narrowed his eyes, "You bribed someone, didn't you."

Tim looked away from him, fiddling with his fingers.

sighing, Danny sat up and started driving down the road. They sat in silence for a while, just listening to the chaos that was Gotham City as they drove. Tim eventually slumped over, his head resting against the window.

It took a good thirty minutes before Danny could turn onto the bridge out of town. The traffic wasn't heavy, just the occasional car here and there. It was almost peaceful.

"Turn here," Tim suddenly instructed, startling Danny.

"Tim!" Danny cried, turning to look at the kid, then back at the road. although, he did do as the kid instructed. "don't do that! you'll give me a heart attack or something! Ancients!"

Tim blinked, then shrugged. "ok," he yawned, rubbing the sleep from his eyes.

"my house is the one with really stupid-looking ducks carved into the gates." Tim supplied, waving his hand at the road ahead of them. "Bruce's is the one with bats, but you knew that."

"Right," Danny agreed. What were the chances that Batman happened to live in a place called Gotham and in a house with black iron gates covered in bats? It was almost as coincidental as Danny's last name sounding like Phantom. Fate really had quite the sense of humor, didn't they?

after they passed a few more dirt roads, Tim pointed at a specific one, "Turn here. The gates a little further back than everyone else's."

Danny hummed, turning the car onto the road. What was his life at this point? Driving children to their huge houses at four-thirty in the morning? agreeing to become Robin? coming out of retirement because a kid asked him to?

Bruce Wayne better appreciate all the effort this kid was going through...

A tall gate slowly popped into view, making Danny slow the car down until he could stop right in front of it. "Alright, kid. You're home. get some sleep. Go to school, I don't know, what do you rich kids do on the weekends? actually, you know what? It doesn't matter, do you have a phone?"

Tim blinked as he slowly unbuckled, "yes?"

"One that's not monitored by your parents or anyone else?"

"..."

Danny sighed, reaching into his back pocket to pull out his phone. "Here," Danny unlocked it, went to settings and pressed the factory rest option. Once the phone finished the reset, he quickly scanned through it to make sure it was all gone before adding his second phone number. once done, he tossed it over to the kid. "here, should work for now. Don't let anyone else have it."

If this was any other situation, Danny would have gone straight to the kid's parents; but considering it was past four in the morning and there wasn't a city-wide amber alert? He has a feeling the kid needs a safety net, and well? What better than a direct line to him?

"I can't just take your phone!" Tim cried, catching the phone before it could fall to the ground.

"It's my backup one. I tend to break my phone pretty often, so I always keep an extra one on me. my current number is saved on it, you can reach out and get in contact with me now." Danny waved off the kid's concern, reaching into the back of the car to grab a bag.

with how often his phone had broken during ghost fights and how frequently his parents dissected his phone for parts? It's a habit at this point to have a backup. or Ten. Pulling the bag to the front, Danny showed the kid what was inside.

"..." Tim blinked, then looked up at Danny. "why do you have a bag of broken phones in your car?"

"Because my phones keep breaking and I figured it would be easier to just keep them for extra parts than toss them. Now," Danny tossed the bag into the back, ignoring how it tipped over and spilled the contents all over the seat. He'd clean it up later. Maybe. "It's early. You need sleep, I need sleep. We can pick another day to sit down and build a game plan."

Tim sat in silence for a moment, staring at the phone in his hands, before glancing up at Danny. "You really mean it?" he asked, turning the phone around anxiously, "you really want my help?"

"kid, Tim," Danny started, tilting his head so he could make eye contact. "with how bad you say Batman's gotten? I'm going to need all the help I can get. Who better than the one who went out of his way to try and actually do something about it?"

Tim's eyes watered as he looked back at the phone. "ok," he whispered, nodding his head. Reaching up, he wiped his face clean before taking a deep breath and letting it out.

"ok," he repeated, voice stronger now. "I'll help. I want to."

"Good," Danny nodded in agreement, then smiled. "get some sleep kid, you need it."

"I don't need it," Tim grumbled, turning to open the door and get out. "but if that's what it takes for you to allow me to help, then I guess I can take a nap or something."

Danny snorted, watching as Tim closed the car door and started making his way to the gate.

as soon as the kid was out of view, Danny slammed his head onto the steering wheel and groaned. He had definitely jinxed himself earlier. How hard can being Robin be? Yeah right. He hasn't even gotten to meet Bruce yet and he's already stressed.

...

Glancing up, Danny watched as the clock glitched then turned to five am.

...

Well then, he might as well do something productive since it was unlikely he'd be getting any more sleep if he went back. Sam would be up by the time he got there, which meant he'd have to answer all of her questions... which would wake Tucker up, which would mean Danny'd have to explain all over again.

Glancing around, Danny suddenly realized something.

Batman.

Bruce Wayne was Batman.

Bruce Wayne; as in, Gotham's own himbo billionaire.

Who lives in Bristol.

Which is where he is right now. Logically speaking, he'd be able to find it pretty fast if he just looked at the gates. It's probably just a few houses from Tim's too, now that he thought about it...

Oh, this was a terrible idea, but when had that ever stopped Danny?

Jazz was so going to kill him for this.

Next

[onesidedradiostatic]

can we talk about how the weirdest part of staticmoth isn't even the fact that they're toxic to each other?

it's how they both react to each other's toxicity with nonchalance.

like. first, during val's tantrum, val throws a glass at vox, or well, in his vicinity.

then vox just... steps away like it's nobody's business, barely bothered by it.

and later, when it's vox's turn to be angry, he roughly pulls val down, shakes him, and shouts at his face.

then val just... shrugs it off.

usually when you think of a toxic relationship, you'd probably think of person A being toxic to person B then person B biting back just as toxic until it's a back and forth of toxicity, a full-blown fight.

but that. that's not staticmoth. staticmoth is fucking weird in that when one is acting toxic towards the other, the other acts nonchalant and doesn't retaliate. then they switch roles on who the toxic one is and who the nonchalant one is.

I am not at all denying the toxicity in their relationship, but they certainly are a really fucking weird brand of toxic that is just. so hard to describe.

[johnny-but-emo]

hey. hey mouthwashing fans. you know that curly isn’t innocent, right? you guys know that he was an enabler, right? you guys know that him being disabled isn’t an excuse for his actions, right?

[funkbun]

made a doodle of snorpy and decided to compare it to two other past snorps. 4 fun

[merlinfromberlin]

Never have I ever seen a smile this fake.

[scarlet-herring]

as someone who’s never liked timsteph i find it so funny that i just accidentally talked myself into a revrob au of them. revrob au where war games happens, steph (~15) gets captured & tortured, except this time tim (~16) comes in to try & help but due to [unforeseen circumstances] no one comes as backup, and they’re both tortured, leading to steph’s red hood era via being resurrected somehow by arthur brown and tim’s oracle era brought on via complications due to torture.

tim’s the one person steph won’t target, and steph’s the one person tim can’t really get angry with about killing, because they get it.

[billpottsismygf]

Doctor Who: The Pyramids of Mars / The Devil's Chord

Bonus foreshadowing: The Pyramids of Mars / The Legend of Ruby Sunday

[greywardenmonkey]

its not a lie to say that veilguard takes the themes from every previous dragon age game and absolutely butchers them to pieces i dont think

[nandysparadox]

im kind of an apologist for the crew when it comes to epic tbh.. justice for them gone too soon 🕊️

[new-austin]

i love looking back at all my Aaron lore it was such a a symptom of the dire mental state and all the medical shit I was going through all wrapped into one nice little bow. Surely when I look back at Saliceae in a few years I won't feel the exact same way lalalala

[raddestrose]

Lu Guang we leave you alone in a hospital room for TWO MINUTES and you break out??

I swear to God

If I could, I would ground you and you are older than me and fictional I would still find a way

[simgerale]

CHAPTER TWENTY ; 2/3

TRANSCRIPT:

luca: Antoin, please. What is going on? Why is the castle buzzing, and why on earth did you have me dress in this attire?

antoin: [sighs] I have little time to explain. All you need to know is that your Empress has convinced me that our empires would be better off as allies.

l: She succeeded then? You have created a new peace treaty?

a: No, brother. You are creating a new peace treaty.

l: ...Whatever do you mean?

a: You were correct when you said that Empress Magdalena did not have ulterior motives. Her only goal seemed to be to keep her empire safe... as well as my brother. So I grant you my blessing, if you so need it. She was adamant that it be your choice.

sheridan: Say hi for me.

l: What—

[his vision turns black, and suddenly he is somewhere else entirely]

l: —do you… Oh.

magdalena: Welcome back to Eden, Prince Luca.

l: …Your majesty?

m: Magdalena... You may call me Magdalena.

[foolsocracy]

A quick question, do you take any commissions by any chance?

If so, how much?

And sorry for earlier!😭😭😭

I've never actually done a commission before actually! I'm a hobbyist through and through

It's mainly just because I'm so busy with school and whatnot, but if you've got something specific in mind you can shoot me a DM and I'll let you know if I could possibly give it a go

[danidoesathing]

in hindsight Buck Vernon is such a funny character. like his whole story starts off with his ass getting dumped but not even realizing it. he goes across the country searching for her and doesn't have any luck until he goes to a random fortune teller (who later admits to scamming him) and takes her vague bullshit to heart which leads him to get caught in the middle of a wild drug ring and he may have accidentally set off a war between said drug dealers and a gang of arsonists that was founded by an undead biker dude. he once bumped into said undead biker dude at a night club while running from the cops. he can see/talk to ghosts and it's never explained why and he doesnt even make a big deal of it. he ends up finding a corpse in the middle of the road and goes "well shit someone has to bury the guy". when said corpse gets up and asks for a smoke buck just. gives it to him and starts having a chat with him. he cant lie for shit and gets caught like every single time but still manages to get out of every situation alive. he once beat up a drug dealer in the back of an arcade. he got black brained which kills every other character it happened to and just. didnt die somehow?? he's killed at least two people and doesn't even blink. when he found his ex and got dumped a second time he just. got up and walked off with a bullet wound in his leg. he presumably lived and proceeds to write weird sad love songs for the rest of his life.

hes the most pathetic noir protagonist ive ever seen. there's something deeply wrong with him. i want to study him

[kingdomoftyto]

...also that conversation between Nilanjana and Carlos had me seriously raising my eyebrows because he described the appearance of some stereotypically sciencey gadget he was going to use to solve the mystery and when she asked him what it did, his response was, specifically, "I just explained it to you."

Up to this point I've accepted all his cartoonishly vague science experiments as just How Things Work in Night Vale, but suddenly I am convinced that he's actually been giving in-depth breakdowns of the physics and geology he's been studying every time, and that some supernatural force is making it so certain people (including the podcast listeners) only hear it as science-buzzword gibberish.