#whatever... and ik a lot of it is just trial and error and stuff which is why this was one of the things i was putting off til i have my own

[itsalwaysdark]

wanting to start taking care of myself better but not wanting 8000 products and i just need somebody to explain to me like im dumb bc i never rly learned abt anything regarding taking care of appearance or hygiene (other than like. Shower is good and wash your hands KDNTJFN) i just dont know what all is like. actually necessary and what isnt and what is in some cases but not all and etc

[verynormaleatinghab1ts]

Master list of everything I do/have done for wɛight lºss:

For context: I've had an ɛd since the beginning of 2022 (though possibly longer?) and have had a lot of trial and error in that time. I am currently at my all-time lowest wɛight and this is my third or fourth rɛlapse. My heavıest ever was ɓmi 25. For this rɛlapse my start was ɓmi 23 at the beginning of August and now I'm down to ɓmi 18.7 as of October. This is gonna be a very thorough master list of all the stuff I keep consistent at to lºse wɛight.

1. Hydration:

Ik you are hearing this for the umpteenth time but DRINK SO MUCH WATER. I probably drink anywhere from 70-100 oz of water a day. You should drink at least HALF YOUR BODY WɛIGHT IN OUNCES of water every day (120 lbs = 60oz water minimum). Whenever my cup is empty I refill it asap or drink sparkling water which I LOVE. The reasons for this are obvious, it takes up stomach space, fends off hunger pangs, hydration, yada yada hopefully you know what water is and does.

2. Other drinks:

I very scarcely consume liquid cªlories. If I want a drink with more flavor, sparkling water, unsweetened tea, or (very rarely) zero/diɛt of whatever soda I'm craving. I don't like energy drinks/coffee but those work as well.

That being said, I still allow it sometimes (meaning if my cªlorie budget allows for it). For example, my favorite drink is AriZona green tea, which is not very high in cªlories if you find the right portion size. The bottles are 160 cªls each, and they sell regular 12 oz cans for 80 cªls each. It's all about portion sizes, even for drinks!

Otherwise, I don't drink a lot of juice or soda anyway. If I do want juice, I try to get it in pouch/can/bottle form instead of from the jugs so they are pre-portioned and I don't have to wɛigh it out to calculate cªls. I have some compulsory thing that I feel the need to CHUG every drink I have, so this helps keep me from gulping down half a gallon of sugar water and is still within my budget. I don't drink protein shakes really, but if it's within your budget, there's no reason not to (especially as a meal replacement).

For alcºhol… sometimes I let myself splurge on cªls a little bit bc these days I only drink if I'm REALLY going through it (bc cªlories got me trippin' so hard I kind of stopped being an alcºholic), but otherwise, I hardly drink at all anymore. When I do, I'll do shots of whatever liquºr I've got atm. 90-100 cªls a shot is atrocious but on an empty stomach, it'll hit quick. Other options I've utilized include hard seltzers, liquºr in diet soda/watered-down juice, or spiked teas. Lower in cªls than other things (generally) and good for someone with a lower alc tolerance. I love beer and wine but it's just not effective and too high cªl if I'm looking to get smashed.

3. Apple Cider Vinegar:

Pretty much since I developed an ɛd, apple cider vinegar has been involved in some form or another. I should also mention that all of these methods have helped a lot with my acne (which was my main excuse for why I was always consuming these things so often). *I DONT ACTUALLY KNOW IF IT DOES ANYTHING BUT I WILL ALWAYS TAKE A WɛIGHT LºSS PLACEBO IF IT WORKS* 

At first, I would take shots (2 TBSP or 1.5 oz) of it in the morning every day, usually just alongside water or tea (though I never personally minded the taste that much). I wouldn't recommend this method since it definitely irritates your teeth/mouth/throat/stomach after prolonged use, and makes your stomach hurt if you don't take it with enough water.

Next, I tried ACV gummies. The downside, is these do have cªls (I think about 20 or 30 for 2 pieces?) and unfortunately I found them delicious so they were always tempting me from my bathroom cabinet. Also, they were pricey and inconvenient since I'd always forget to ɛat them in the morning.

Now I take ACV capsules since I prefer to just swallow pills over chewing up a sticky little gummy every morning. No cªls, no taste, quick and easy, MUCH cheaper. I take 2 in the morning and 2 at night, but DO NOT start with that many because it will hurt your stomach. Start with just one in the morning and increase from there.

4. Intake:

I want to make it very clear that ɛating ANY amount under your BMR (basal mɛtabolic rate) will result in wɛight lºss, and this can be calculated on various websites. You don't have to ɛat under 1000 to lºse. You could ɛat OVER 1000 and still lºse. Please use your best judgment to find the right amount for your needs.

I don't track/count net cªlories (cªlories after subtracting cªlories burned), only the total amount of cªlories I CONSUME. I may bump it up a little *very sparingly* but I've maybe only done that 3 or 4 times in the past three months, and never any more than my maintenance cªlories. For me, 500-800 range is just enough to keep me from going insane while still consistently dropping a good amount of wɛight every week. And I don't track seasonings at all because that's literally dumb lol. If using enough salt and pepper to kill a small child will get you to fill up on broccoli instead of bınging on chips who gaf. It'll be >5 cªls regardless, you'll burn that many cªls just sprinkling it in and chewing.

5. Tracking cªls:

I track everything I eat and I wɛigh out my fºod pretty frequently, but usually only for things like meat, dairy, or high carb/sugar foºds. 5 or 10 extra grams that I would let slide before could add a lot more cªlories than you realize (and mostly from fªt or sugar 😧). I don't bother wɛighing out low cªl foods usually, I just make rough wɛight/volume measurements. I usually overestimate my cªls and still end up ɛating below my budget anyway. As someone who would wɛigh out every single little thing that went into my body (including water) to the hundredth decimal gram, being obsessive about it will drive you insane and you will risk a miserable bınge/rɛstrict cycle. It's stressful and annoying and you will still lºse wɛight if you don't. 

I don't track/care about my macrºs at all. I do try to ɛat more protein than bread and sugar when I can, but I don't really prioritize it. I would recommend that you do though, PRIORITIZE PROTEIN AND FIBER because these keep you full for longer and will help you to feel less tired from undɛrɛating.

6. Fªsting/OMªD:

What I feel has been absolutely key to my success has been fªsting and OMªD (one mɛal a day). I fªst a minimum of 20 hours every day and only ɛat dinner (because it's required in my house) + a small snack (usually an apple 🤤). My dinners range anywhere from 200-600 cªls and I never let my snack go over 200 cªls. This keeps me full through the night, and throughout the day I tend to keep myself so busy that I forget to ɛat anyway.

Once (sometimes twice) a week I will do a fªst anywhere between 40-50 hours but I would recommend 24-36 hours for someone who does not fªst for long periods as often since this has had a lot of negative side effects for me (fainting, dizziness, nausea, vomiting, stomachache, headache, low blood pressure, spikes/drops in heart rate, weakness, exhaustion). A lot of my issues come from overproduction of stomach acid, dehydration, and general shitty blood circulation. If you do want to fªst for longer periods, here are my tips:

Constantly be drinking water and stay super hydrated.

Chew gum, this produces saliva and reduces acid production.

Absolutely NO carbonated drinks, this will INCREASE acid production!

Extremely light to NO exercise (I break this rule a lot 😓), conserve your energy while fasting.

Drink hot liquids (tea, coffee, water) in the morning, this keeps me from getting nauseous and lightheaded throughout the day.

My body cannot handle any pills/vitamins on an empty stomach, so take with caution (obv don't do this if you take medication you're required to take with food)

Overall reduce stimuli like lights, sounds, temperatures, and smells. These usually make my side effects much worse and cause me to get sick more often (but I also have autism so that may factor).

Keep yourself occupied, preferably something with your hands. I get a lot done with school and a lot of my hobbies like writing, puzzles, painting, etc. I also deep clean and organize things around the house frequently which keeps me occupied for a couple hours.

7. Exercise:

In the past, I had a pretty bad exercise ªddiction whenever I would be deep in my ɛd, and honestly, it didn't help much at all. It made me extremely tired and sore all the time and it led me to bınge often because I told myself it would "cancel out". Exercise does not contribute to wɛightlºss as much as people think it does, since wɛightlºss is primarily done through your diɛt. Now, I exercise once or twice a week (if at all), and this is the most wɛight I've ever lost and KEPT OFF, so slowing down on the exercise has really helped me a lot. I primarily do cardio like walking, stairmaster, playing sports, home workouts etc., but nothing super intense. I only aim to get over 2000 steps a day and am pretty sedentary because of school.

8. Actual foods I eat:

Disclaimer: Outside of ªna, I also have dealt with ARFıD/super picky ɛating my whole life, so this list won't be super varied and relatively basic.

First things first, take multivitamins/supplements. Especially Iron, Calcium, Vitamin B12, and Vitamin D. I prefer capsules, but if gummies, drink mixes, etc are easier DO THAT. These are essential vitamins and minerals that will keep you from feeling like walking dead.

Protein: I have never ɛaten pork, and I very scarcely ɛat beef or lamb. I pretty much only ɛat chicken/turkey for everything which is leaner and higher in protein than other meats. I don't like/ɛat seafood or tofu, but that's also an option. I fucking LOVE eggs they're one of my favorite foºds, plus decently low cªl, protein, filling, and delectable in any form. I really really like nuts as well (esp cashews) but it's very rare I get to ɛat them because they are so high cªl 😓 However if you do they're a good source of healthy fªts and protein! I save it for special occasions.

Veggies/fruits: I ɛat A LOT of fruits and veggies bc I try to incorporate several into any foºd I make. Cooking pasta? Fill it with veggies. Stir fry? 90% veggies. Literally anything else? Half my plate is veggies. Volume ɛating is a lifesaver. It keeps me full, adds fiber and vitamins to my diɛt, and is low cªl because they're mostly water, so I ɛat them as much as I want. The fruits/veg I ɛat the most: spinach, kale, lettuce, cabbage, fresh herbs, tomatoes, peppers, onion, broccoli, green beans, ginger, bok choy, carrots, apples, raspberries, blackberries, blueberries, strawberries, grapes, melon, citrus, bananas.

Dairy: Low fªt, skim, or 0% fªt dairy products are always the go-to, you get the same result for whatever you're subbing it for. I haven't drank cows milk since I was a wee child because it's disgusting and I don't really ɛat any dairy other than cheese, so making this swap wasn't very difficult for me. I do try to limit dairy as much as I can though because it is so high in fªt and cªlories. If a recipe has butter or cream I try to leave it out or use as little as possible.

"Breads": I still ɛat things like pasta, tortillas, rice, and regular bread frequently, just in small amounts. And I will almost never double up on 'breads' (like having a bread roll and pasta together). I try to ɛat protein pasta over regular to at least get some benefit from it since it is so high cªl. Lower cªl options you can have a little more freely are anything keto or gluten-free/vegan options. Sometimes if I want toast or a sandwich I will cut one slice of bread in half so I have two very thin slices and it tricks me into thinking I ªte more than I really did. I really love instant noodles but unfortunately they are very high in cªlories so I haven't ɛaten them in a very long time ☹️. Instead I ɛat rice noodles or instant pho since it's pretty low cªl compared to the fried wheat noodles.

9. Junk food swaps/junkorɛxia:

Okay I know you just saw the big list of "healthy" foods but I am a junkorɛxic to my CORE. I love sugar, I love desserts, I love bread, I love cheese, I love chips, I love fast foºd, all of the worst highest cªlorie garbage you can think of. I still ɛat these things from time to time believe it or not, but now we're going back to portion control. Brownies are one of my favorite treats, and I still get to have them if it's *within my budget*. I can still have bread, and chips, and cookies etc, as long as it's *within my budget*. You don't necessarily have to completely cut these things out, because I know when I do, I go crazy and bınge on all of these foºds eventually. Even still, I don't ɛat these fºods very often because I found lower cªl swaps!

I'm not going to try to lie to you and tell you "if you want potato chips ɛat baked broccoli or seaweed instead ❤️" because that shit is WACK and not at all like chips. Here are some swaps I make for most of the garbage I usually would ɛat for the fellow junkorɛxics:

N!CKS/halotop ice cream, zero sugar popsicles/bars: lowest cªl ice cream flavors of N!CKS ice cream are around 1 cªl per gram! I like these because they feel less heavy in my stomach than regular ice cream, and taste more like frozen yogurt anyway 🤤. I haven't actually tried halotop but I assume both brands are similar. Popsicles I can't ever tell a difference, it's just flavored with ice sugar or flavored ice with no sugar, neither are super high cal.

Sugar-free jello and pudding: self-explanatory, taste very very close to the regular to me so I don't even realize a difference! I hate yogurt but zero sugar greek yogurts would work too if you're into that. I use this as a swap for jellos/puddings/ice cream.

Baked chips, savory rice crisps, popcorn: baked chips are lower cªl and lower in fªt by weight, but they taste way different from the regular so don't expect them to be the same. Rice crisps are super low cªl compared to chips and come in a lot of flavors (I like these better than regular chips most of the time bc they're crunchier). Popcorn (even the buttered or other flavors) isn't as high cªl as I assumed it was! Plus it's high volume and filling, bc I know my ass cannot finish a whole bag of microwave popcorn to myself.

Sweet rice cakes, fiber one bars, graham crackers, cinnamon raisin bread, frozen waffles or pancakes (ordered low–high cªl): These are my replacement "baked goods" because that is something I crave a lot. I know most of these aren't at all like cookies, but it works for me personally and I can fit them into my small-ish budget regularly without having to bake everything myself all the time. Even outside of having an ɛd I've always loved rice cakes, so regardless I ɛat them a lot, low cªl, CRUNCHY, cheap. Fiber one bars are like 60-90 cªls + fiber ofc. Graham crackers are 130 cªls for 2 sheets. Cinnamon raisin bread is 90 cªls a slice (personal fav). Frozen waffles/pancakes are usually around 200 cªls a serving. 

Sugar-free candy/other: I think it's good to assume any candy that's keto or dairy/sugar-free will be lower cªl than the regular version. I don't really ɛat a lot of candy day-to-day but whenever I crave it I go for granola or fiber one bars, or have a small amount of dark chocolate instead. If I'm craving sour candy, I'll have fruit, jello, fruit gummies, or drink juice. These aren't very good or direct swaps, but I tend to crave flavors and textures more than specific fºod items (if that makes sense). But regardless, if I have enough cªls leftover, I just ɛat the real thing lol.

10. Cook your own food:

Cooking for myself 99% of the time has been crucial for my wɛightlºss. I'm able to wɛigh and portion out all my ingredients accurately to get exact cªlories for anything I make. Plus this way I can throw tons of vegetables into whatever I make to give it more volume/nutrition. 

I also cook for my whole family, which means they constantly have high cªl requests for what they want me to make like pastas, fried foºds, burgers, etc. If I know for certain it will fit into my budget, I'll just ɛat it (with much difficulty) so they don't get suspicious. However I'll also swap/remove the super high cªl parts in recipes completely and other times I will add all the high cªl stuff to just their portions and keep a 'clean' portion for myself. 

I will pretty much never get take out unless my whole family is getting it, and even then, I try to just have leftovers or cook my own meal instead. If I HAVE to get take out, I try to get the lowest cªl thing I possibly can.

11. Avoiding bınges/munchies:

Out of everything, I would say avoiding bınges is the hardest psychological aspect to get past. I smºke 🍃 every night to sleep, so I be getting the munchies really bad sometimes, and sometimes it feels like there's only so much to do before my brain goes "fuck it" and starts ɛating everything in sight. These are basic, but here are the things that have worked the best for me consistently:

Sparkling water/flavored diɛt drinks. You get the satisfaction of having some sort of flavor on your tongue without the consequences of ɛating, and takes up room in your stomach to trigger fullness hormones.

Gum (especially mint flavor) tricks my brain into thinking I'm ɛating something + mint works as an appɛtite suppressªnt.

Staying busy is the biggest thing, always be doing something that is tedious or involves a lot of focus. I'm very easily distractable regardless, but the second I've really set my attention to one thing, I don't think about anything else. Read/listen to a book, get out of the house and wander for a bit, go for a drive, watch a movie, do a craft, online window shop, play a computer/mobile game, clean/organize. I will very frequently leave my house to wander aimlessly around a store just to get away from any fºod.

When in doubt, sleep it off. At night especially, I'm too lazy to really do all that much so if I feel like I'm going to lose my grip on reality, spark up another bowl and pass tf out. Can't ɛat if I'm sleepin'!

Chɛw/Spıt: I feel like this used to be more popular with ɛd ppl a few years ago but I hardly see anyone talk about doing it now. I do this mostly with mɛals I don't want to ɛat when I'm fªsting or with all the trash I would want to bınge on and it honestly works really well for me! You do probably end up consuming a very small amount of the cªlories, but I always make sure to spıt everything out really well and rinse my mouth/brush my teeth right after.

And that's all I think. Thank you for reading! I spent a lot of time on this so reblogs are appreciated! I hope some of this is at least somewhat helpful to anyone. If y'all have any questions, reach out! Please stay safe, help is always out there whenever you need it. Cheers!

[mithliya]

Hey don't answer if this is tmi, but I noticed you've talked about sex with your gf a few times and I don't know anyone irl to ask lol. Do you have any general sex advice, or links to read or whatever? My girlfriend and I are each other's first, and we really struggle with it. Basically every time we just end up using the vibrator on each other, which is fine and fun, but not much variety, but just hand stimulation has never been enough

for most women, fingering or using hands alone isn’t enough. it isn’t for me! my gf on the other hand gets easily overly stimulated. it varies from woman to woman (no 2 vulvas are the same etc). idk if you guys have tried it but perhaps oral might work better? my fave is oral with fingering but never fingering alone. ALSO: lots of foreplay is good. the wetter she is, the more she’ll enjoy smaller things. foreplay includes stuff like: kiss her neck, whisper dirty things to her, tell her how much you want her and how hot you think she is. sucking on her nipples will probably get a good reaction out of her. tease!!!! a lot!! it’s the key to good sex with women. kiss down her body and if you guys are comfortable with oral TRY IT. if either of u are insecure over potential smell or sth, just give it a quick rinse right before. often u can get in ur head when it’s the first time so do what u need to to feel more comfortable, relaxed, & able to enjoy the moment. when it comes to oral, it’s probably best not to jump right into it unless a lot of teasing went into it and she’s super wet already. there’s several tricks for oral that u can find online but honestly when it comes to that, it’s quite individual. pay attention to her body language and see what gets more of a reaction and what doesnt. don’t be shy about sucking on the labia! and ofc, circling around the clit is a safe bet. pointing your tongue will make it more focused on a certain spot and relaxing it will allow u to cover more space. you should have it relaxed at first and start simple, i can’t specify more there bc with every woman ive had to try something different so the most important thing is to experiment with it and if u see sth causes a lot of moans, stick to it! also for fingering: make sure your nails are short, filed down & perhaps don’t cut them right before having sex (idk how true this is but my gf insists if u cut them right before then it’s still quite sharp). when inserting ur fingers, insert one slowly (make sure she’s wet first) and bend it slightly. you’ll find one spot that feels a little different from the rest of her vagina, try to focus more on that spot. it makes fingering feel nicer! don’t rub in there too much cause it can get painful and uncomfortable, try a come here motion.

no one gets it right the first time! but if you guys are comfortable with each other and have time to explore each other’s bodies, you’ll figure out how to please each other without toys with more experience. also u should both practice paying attention to ur own bodies and saying what u enjoy more/less to help the other! ik many women find it embarrassing or bossy or something but women like it when ur telling them how to please u from my experience ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

idk if i helped but i hope i did😭 it’ll take time but you’ll figure it out. be patient! you both need time to understand what the other likes. vibrators are easier bc they stimulate so much that often you’ll get wet without foreplay and orgasm easily so i understand defaulting to it, having sex without any toys for the first time is often less quick and takes more trial and error

[lesbeet]

sorry to ask a big question like this unprompted and of course please don't feel a need to answer this, but i'm having difficulties right now as a college student who managed to never really practice composing formal writing in high school and my first 2 years of college now having to take writing intensive courses. i feel like theres a lot of shifting between different modes in a bit of an intuitive way needed to write effectively, and i'm sure with practice i could get a better sense for that, but in general ive never been good at organizing my thoughts and have a lot of trouble with executive function issues/adhd stuff that make it so that when people try to break things down like ‘just write an outline before you write to structure your thoughts!’ as a simple first step it feels like theres so many unnamed steps i’m supposed to figure out before i can even get to that point. i get the feeling there might just not be easy answers applicable across different people beyond the normal steps people recommend for essay writing and i just have to continue trying to figure it out even if it feels pretty fruitless right now, but i just wanted to ask since i know you’ve talked about both being an english teacher and having adhd (while ofc that doesnt mean youve had that issue, i at least feel it might be easier than how ive tried to articulate my issues with people knowledgeable about writing in my life who dont have adhd or anything) i was wondering if you maybe had any advice about how i could approach this or break things down further or anything? thank you so much even if you just read this and don't respond, my apologies for sending all this!

i'm actually going to approach answering this from more of an english teacher perspective than from an adhd-er perspective, bc i find that a lot of my students without adhd also struggle with organizing their thoughts and putting them into words to a degree that necessitates further direction beyond just "go write an outline"

i can't really give you any specifics without knowing the style of writing or the goal of the piece, but 9 times out of 10 you'll be pretty well served by either:

1. compiling evidence until a pattern emerges, which will help you figure out your overall angle, thesis, claim—whatever you call it, it's the central idea that your writing piece is pointing to. then you can figure out the best way to present your evidence in support of your central idea

or,

2. if you already know what point you want to make, then it's just a matter of figuring out the best way to do it. is there specific evidence that you can use to support it? is there a particular train of logic that you could delineate to help your reader reach the conclusion you're trying to present? sometimes trial and error is best here, or even setting a timer for 5 minutes and typing stream-of-consciousness-style nonstop about the topic to see if any repeated ideas emerge. again, looking for patterns helps here, and adhd-ers are often particularly adept at pattern recognition! once you've found the patterns that will help you make your point, it's honestly not the worst idea to just rearrange them in your head until it feels like it makes sense. most poorly organized writing i read is only poorly organized because the writer put down the ideas in the order they came up with them and didn't try to rearrange them into something more effective. if you try putting things in different spots, you'll start to get a feel for what makes sense, which ideas logically lead into one another, etc.

for writing fiction, honestly the same options can work for brainstorming or outlining, but instead of a thesis, it's a theme, and instead of evidence and a path of logic, it's characters and a plot.

ik this is super vague but i hope it was helpful! if you want more specific advice, feel free to reach out over chat! thank you for being patient i meant to answer this yesterday kdsjflksjd <3

[cosykaleb-blog]

Muse page

“Hasbeen boy genius”

NAME: Kaleb (Kyle) Mordechai Broflovski   AGE: 17 OCCUPATION: Junior Year of high school SEXUALITY: Bi sexual (But in major denial about it) GENDER: He/him MENTAL DISORDERS: Suspects he might be on the autism spectrum, but was never tested. RELIGION: Agnostic (Open to learn, but has a hard time believing what he was taught about his faith)

PERSONALITY TRAITS:

Logical

Book worm

Lacks empathy, but is sympathetic (or tries to be)

Organized

Hard worker academically

Lazy in just about everything else

Egotistic

Loose sweaters and baggy pants are life

HISTORY:

Kyle’s life have been seemingly uneventful other than what ever shenanigans and he his friends tend to get up to. He’s always been the smart kid of the house and always took that title for granted until Ike started to shine academically more and Kyle started finding himself fighting for his father’s approval. Gerald has always been inclined that his children do as best as possible in everything they do otherwise he sees no point in doing anything. Kyle never agrees with his father’s opinions on things because he sees it as biased and because of this there has been a lot of fights at the Broflovski dinner table which always ends with Gerald throwing the “I am your father you need to respect me” card and Kyle storming off to his room. His mother always take the liberty to bring up an extra plate of food and to talk to him trying very hard to keep the peace in the family. Kyle also conflicts with his parents when it comes to his sense of religion. He hardly considers himself an atheist, but he doesn’t really believe in most of what he was told about his faith and this causes fights mostly between him and his dad. Sheila isn’t very happy about it either, but she knows better than to fight with Kyle about something like religion and figured he’s an adult he can start believing what he wants to even if it upsets her. Kyle works very hard to make sure he’s top of his class because his dad wants him to get in to a career he sees fit enough like medicine even though Kyle has more of an interest in cooking. Though he struggles to keep his title as he started becoming second in his class and this causes even more conflict between him and his father. Because of his somewhat unstable relationship with his dad Kyle often feels anxious and uncomfortable whenever he’s home, so he spends most of his time at his friends houses. Kyle has a need to break away and do what he wants and to live his own life, but he’s too dependent on his parents and he values his mother too much to just run away, so he’s stuck. Because of the academic pressure he built a disdain for school and would skip classes and smoke in the school alley with the Goth kids if it weren’t for his conscious and the looming fear of how his father would react if he found him rebelling to that extreme. He’s always had a feeling that he might not be entirely heterosexual, but he pushes away any shred of doubt and tendencies in fear of how his father would react and managed to convince himself to live in denial of his identity

APPEARANCE:

Curly red hair that takes a lot of maintenance to stop it from taking over the world. In the beginning he would spend about an hour every morning to make sure it looked tidy and in place, but as he got older he decided “fuck it” and now let’s his hair do whatever it wants. It’s its own person it has the freedom to peruse it’s own path. He has freckles on most parts of his body though its more obvious on his face and shoulders. When he was little it wasn’t as clear, but the older he got the more prominent it became. He has no piercings at the moment. He used to have a septum piercing that he tried hiding from his parents by pushing it inside of his nose, but one day he was careless and forgot and his mother nearly fainted. He’s probably going to attempt to get another once he’s moved out and it’ll be easier to hide. He thought about getting a tattoo one day, but he’s squirmish about the thought of the needle. Fashion wise he’s got a fairly good sense of how to look  somewhat decent with buttoned up shirts and nice shoes, but generally he lives in beanies and baggy pants with interesting patterns on them. He prefers the whole “poor college art/film student who lives off of noodles and weed and probably listens to red hot chili peppers” look because its easy. It’s only a coincidence that he just so happen to be a RHCP fan. He dreams about walking barefoot all the time if only it wasn’t so cold as well as his germ phobia. He is a very tall boy about 6'6 . He also has rather big hands that are always perfectly moisturized. He inherited his mother’s green eyes. Because of his diabetes he’s very careful about what he eats and sugar content in food, but his mom makes sure he’s well fed most of the time and also because he loves his mom’s cooking he has a pudgy belly. He shaves from time to time, but occasionally he’ll deal with walking around with a scruff stubble when the work load gets too much or he’s just too lazy to shave.  

PERSONALITY:

Kyle comes off as like a really complicated person, but in reality he’s really simple when you get to know him. He thinks with logic and not emotion and sometimes that gets in his away with his ability to comfort his friends. That doesn’t mean he can’t be sympathetic, though he struggles with empathy. He’s a book worm and loves learning about things as much as he can and because of this people tend to label him as a nerd, he doesn’t really care all that much though cause labels are dumb. A lot of people get the impression, because of this label and his need for logical thinking, that he tends to be high strung and kind of anal when in reality he’s a massive dork that still laughs at farts. He’s not professionally diagnosed, but he’s always had a feeling he might be on the Autism spectrum and have been considering getting himself tested, but with his father there is a prejudice about learning disabilities and disorders, so he decided to just not bring it up to his parents to avoid drama and just find ways to deal with it himself. He’s very clean due to his light germ phobia so he avoids touching public things when he can and always carry around a bottle of hand sanitizer and seaweed scented hand cream. He also practices self care pretty much everyday and uses body butter and scrubs which means he’s extra soft and always smell amazing. (General scents he goes by is honey, peppermint or basil, but he’ll use anything if it tickles his fancy enough) Because of his logical thinking he’s always curious about testing out things for trial and error before he forms his own opinions so this means he’s open to experimenting with the occasional cigarette and joint just to see if he would actually enjoy it, though it’s not exactly something he would see himself indulging in. He has his limits though he’d never think about trying stuff like hard drugs cause he’s smart enough to know what a major effect it has on your life. Generally he finds stuff like drinking and partying rather trivial, but he will participate when his friends are doing it just to have some fun. It could be written off as peer pressure that he tends to fall for from time to time. With his parents being so academically strict and conservative because of their religious morals he does have a need to rebel, though he hardly ever acts out on it cause he’s not in the mood for whatever repercussions it has in store afterwards though that doesn’t stop him from doing what he wants, its just a matter of how well can he get away with it which can also be a problem considering he’s not a very good liar and his conscious gets the best of him. He loves like a man scorned. He’ll be friendly with you and treat you like an acquaintance in the beginning, but if you manage to work yourself in to an important role in his life he would become a lot more emotionally invested in you and can get kind of clingy. He’s not a very cuddly person either, but if you’re family or a very good friend he’ll hug you. Just don’t touch his hair that’s reserved for extra special people and his mom.            

Extra info:

Major soft spot for small dogs like Pugs, Corgis and Boston Terriers

Dog person and would love to own one, but Ike is incredibly allergic to animal dandruff.

His aesthetic consists out of rainy days, the smell of coffee and a giant wool blanket.

His nails are like a pretty big deal, Always clean and trimmed.

When he’s not reading he’s on youtube looking up “10 best scenes from the movie ‘Mean Girls’”

His height makes him look very intimidating, but in reality he’s kind of a teddy bear. Just don’t piss him off if you know what’s good for you.

Has reading glasses, but never actually wears them

Proud collector of interesting socks

Favourite friend’s character is Rachael

Character peeve’s:

When people don’t put the lid back on to the toothpaste

People who pee with the bathroom door open

When his family barges in to his room and don’t close the door behind them when they leave

Cartman

[lesbeet]

this might be a strange question but what goes into becoming a teacher? i've been thinking about becoming a teacher and i'm nervous even though it's something i really think i want to do and i'm curious as to how you go about becoming one like what courses/requirements do you need to take and how do you come up with a lesson plan and everything? and how did you know teaching was something you wanted to do or realize it was something you would be good at?

hm well i can only tell you about my own experience, which i would say is probably pretty unorthodox, but it’s been working really well for me! 

so i’ve been working on a masters in teaching for english/language arts grades 5-12 from western governors university, which is an (accredited) online program for aspiring teachers who need to be licensed as teachers in general as well as certified/endorsed in their particular subject areas. depending on what you want to teach, there are a couple of undergrad teaching degrees they offer (i believe it’s elementary ed, special ed, and a couple of different math and science programs), but to do like language arts or social studies etc, you’d need to have a bachelors degree to qualify -- though i also did my bachelors at wgu (in business management sdklfdjskdflsjd i hated it) so it doesnt need to be education-related or anything

if you wanna know more about my particular program let me know, bc it works fairly unusually but is a legitimate post-secondary educational institution and is also incredibly affordable, and idk what i’d be doing if i hadnt found out that it existed lmao

but so yeah idk what an education undergrad would consist of, but for my program in particular there were a lot of english content classes, obviously, like secondary disciplinary literacy, english pedagogy, secondary reading instruction and interventions, stuff like that

and then there were a lot of more generalized pedagogical courses, like educational assessment, foundational perspectives of education, classroom management, fundamentals of diversity and inclusion, principles of psychology: child and adolescent development, and stuff like that

again, this is just based on my own experience, but re: lesson plans, i actually just had some assignments for my courses where i had to write them and justify the thought process behind the decisions i made! like in my english pedagogy course, i had to write 3 essays (one for a literature-based lesson, one for a grammar-based lesson, and one for a writing-based lesson), and in each essay there was a section where i had to plan an entire lesson using their lesson plan format, and then explain and justify why i made each choice that i made. 

i’m starting student-teaching next semester, as soon as we get back from winter break, and i assume i’ll get more practice with lesson-planning through that, but basically it kind of comes down to like...figuring out the standards your students are supposed to reach, then figuring out how you’re going to break them down into a curriculum, and then for each lesson you figure out what objectives/goals you want your students to reach by the end, and you figure out how to present the material and then assess in some way whether or not the students understand it. once you know what the purpose of a lesson plan is (whether re: the idea of lesson plans in general, or a specific lesson plan you’re working on), the rest is just figuring out how to achieve that purpose. and it comes with practice! and trial and error, and figuring out what works and doesnt work with your own teaching style and in your classroom, etc. ik that’s super vague but so much of it depends of the parameters you’re given—like while i’m student-teaching i won’t be picking the books we read, so i’ll already have that requirement figured out for me, yknow?

as for your last question, my mom has been teaching my whole life, and my dad started teaching when i was about 10. my aunt is also a teacher, and my other aunt is a speech-language pathologist, so. i grew up around teachers kfjsldkfjs

i’ve just always liked explaining things to people and helping them understand them! i think really what it comes down to is that i just have a lot of passion and a lot of things to say sldfksjdkflj like i really do believe that english/language arts in particular is applicable in all parts of life, because all people communicate. i can’t speak for like. calculus or biology or whatever, but 99.9999% of people will need to do some sort of reading, and some sort of writing and/or speaking and/or communication of some type or another, and for all of the “the curtains are just blue!!!” whiners out there, it’s crucial to know how to communicate with others, and to understand what others are attempting to communicate to you, and i can’t think of a single scenario in which that isn’t the case. 

plus like, idk a single person who doesn’t like some form of story, whether through tv shows or movies or books or plays or podcasts or video games etc etc etc, and imo those can all be enhanced and made even better by having some sort of background knowledge of storytelling as an art, or as a process, or as an established medium with its own structures and intertextual lexicon etc! like the more i read about the art and history of storytelling, the more i enjoy movies and tv shows (which i already love and watch frequently), bc storytelling isn’t just a textual medium!

tbh part of the reason i think i’m good at explaining things is because i grew up in an emotionally abusive household, and i learned very early on how to anticipate the way another person (usually my dad lol) would interpret something i said to him, regardless of what i actually meant by it. so i subconsciously learned to apply that skill to other people, and now i’ve got sort of a knack for being able to cater my explanations to different people based on how i think they’ll best understand the information, and not just in a classroom setting—like i sometimes serve as a mediator/”interpreter” when my sister and my dad are having difficult conversations, because i know them both well enough, and the way they think well enough, that when one of them says something, i can usually understand both their intention AND how the other person is going to interpret it, and i can rephrase or explain things so miscommunication doesn’t end up making the problem worse

so in a classroom, i can explain things in several different ways, and if i’m working one-on-one with different kids i can usually figure out what isn’t clicking and can try another way to explain it. also bc my adhd brain processes information by making connections to other things i already know, i’m particularly good at coming up with (often unusual) metaphors or analogies for things, and people are like “oh wow ok that’s a weird way to explain it but i definitely get it now” and stuff

so basically i’ve learned bc of necessity how to communicate more effectively with others, and because i want everyone else to get the enjoyment out of language arts that i do, i’m drawn to teaching because i hope to help the students find at least some area of it that they’re interested in, and to show them that literature/storytelling/communication aren’t just about reading old boring books written by racist white dudes who hated women, but about learning to represent and interpret and take part in the human experience, because the foundation of any sort of society is communication, and that very basic desire to be understood by others

so even when i didnt actively Want To Be A Teacher it was always kinda in the back of my mind like “well if i dont find anything else i wanna do, i can always be an english teacher” bc most of my favorite teachers growing up were english teachers, and even at my absolute worst i did just fine in those classes, even when i hadnt read the books we were discussing (which was most of the time jsdklfsjd which is now kind of a problem for me as a teacher so i do think i shot myself in the foot there but oh well, i was 14)

anyway, as usual that got super long, but i hope it was helpful! lemme know if you have any other questions :)