#what's the magic formula
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According to my mood tracking app, the longest I have gone without writing since I started up again in Jan 2021 was ten days in a row, which was when I was in GA for xmas during the last two weeks of Dec 2021...
The overall effect on my mood when including the writing activity is pretty high, in a positive way, based on the data.
All of that to say that my current depressive slump as a result of facing the fact that I may have finally hit a hard wall of burn out, after two years of intense output?
...well, it makes sense lol.
#thoughts#personal#depression#mental health#i desperately need a break i know i do my brain is spinning out ans having difficulty even starting on concepts/stories#but also... writing is the center tower of my support structure it's what I do to unwind and make myself happy#i anticipated some amount of this uhh feeling gutted and empty after break up au was over#but i didn't anticipate this fucking weird limbo inbtw of being burnt out and unable to write but ALSO unable to find joy in other things??#my brain doesn't want to read it doesn't want to play video games or do art or pursue a different hobby#it's not latching onto any non pirate things despite me pspspssing ans throwing other content in front of it#like I'm TRYING#with 1899 with Sunder with Disco Elysium etc#it feels like shit frankly#and also a lot of the pirate ppl i started this journey with have also gotten tired or moved on completely#i just am absolutely CONFOUNDED that my brain is finding zero joy in even rotisserie chickening pirate stuff#who am i?#god i hope it's just a little slump and I snap out of it#cuz i am thrashing like a fish in a net trying to figure out how to make ny brain happy#what's the magic formula#and the brain fog is still here so like i would LOVE more distraction from IRL shit#i can use my friends to produce joy to some extent right now but it's limited#bc im also Still Tired so doing the Jay Thing of trying to fill needs and thus feel useful has a hard limit#reminds myself im not just an endless battery#anyway im desperately trying to find heathy coping and not ooze all over everybody but it's fucking hard#venting#i find it hard to talk to my therapist about this which maybe means i need a new one#just another Thing to do
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Charles and Carlos with Magician Shin Lim | Las Vegas GP
#Carlos is always so frustrated with magic tricks he Needs to understand#the way they were discussing it trying to figure out how he did it#carlos keeps looking at charles for answers and charles just laughs#“what's interesting?” 🤨#charles leclerc#carlos sainz#carlos sainz jr#charlos#1655#f1#formula 1#mypost#las vegas gp 2024#shin lim
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Fernando Alonso & His Relationship With Cards
I'm sure we're all familar with the cards on the back of Fernando's Vegas GP helmet by now, but did you know his relationship with cards goes a lot deeper?
I. Magic Tricks
You've probably seen or heard someone at least mention Fernando's propensity for card tricks. As far as I can tell he was doing them(publically) as far back as 2003 all the way to as recently as 2018. Even once performing a card trick, with a condom and a teddy bear(!??!?!??!!), in front of Valentino Rossi who said "How was that possible?"(x)
But how did this start? According to James Allen, "Fernando admits to having been heavily influenced by his grandfather, a mercurial figure, who taught him magic and card tricks, still one of his passions away from the race track."(x) And I'm not sure the validity of this one, because I couldn't find an actual source, but apparently he once said: "My parents are responsible for the two things I like doing most - driving and magic tricks. They bought me my first go-kart and a magician's kit."
In several interviews he described it as his hobby off track, and that he loved learning new tricks and surprising others in the garage with them! So clearly cards are pretty important to him both as a hobby but also to who he is as a person since they've been with him just as long as racing has.
II. Card Symbolism in His Helmets
This is the reason I originally made this post, but I thought I should also explain the origins of his card fascination first. As I said, we probably all remember the cards on the back of his helmet in Vegas, but did you know that wasn't the first time he had cards on the back of his helmet?
From 2008-2013, he used to have a pair of cards on the back of his helmets. The symbolisms of the cards themselves as well as the evolution of their design is really fascinating to me! Even more so with the recent development of the card choice in 2023.
Fernando said he wanted to reference his two titles in some way on the back of his helmet and after his friend sent him several ideas, he decided on having two cards(an ace of clubs and an ace of hearts, sometimes pictured with 05 and 06 on them as well), saying: "I picked the cloverleaf [the ace of clubs - Ed] to give me luck, but the only pity is that it doesn't have four leaves!"(X)
2008.
Here's the very first appearance of the cards! They're displayed flat, with the 05 and 06 clearly visible
2009.
Very similar to 2008, but with a slightly different design, and they're maybe a bit more straight with less shadow?
2010.
This is the first major change! I was sad they didn't have the years on them anymore, but then I realized they're sparkly to match with his signature lightning bolts on the top of the helmet!!
2011.
Honestly I'm still somewhat unsure if this is the actual 2011 helmet? It's pretty difficult to find clear photos of the back of helmets from older seasons. It's easiest to find them on replica sites or auction sites so I'm not 100%? But anyways, I like that this has the championship years on the underside of the cards
2012.
This is when I started getting weirdly emotional about the helmets. Do you see how they've progressed from being a centerpoint to being curled up and sad at the bottom of the helmet? Not listing the year anymore??
2013.
Same thoughts as 2012. And after this season, they cease to exist (just like his ferrari chair in the garage, WOAH CALLBACK), until cards make a reeappearance in his Vegas helmet, albeit in a different form
2013 Monaco(Honorable Mention):
For some reason 2013 helmets were easier to find proper pictures of, so I happened to witness this absolute beauty. The creativity of this helmet genuinely blows me away??? Wanting to keep the card motif, but making sure to incorporate it into the rest of the puzzle piece design?? Mwah! There was another special 2013 helmet but they didn't change the cards at all so I really applaud this one
2023 Las Vegas(The Return of The King):
The magnificent return! But look! The cards are different cards! Instead of being two aces, it's now an ace of hearts, a four of hearts(his driver number of course!) and, the, now iconic, representation of himself as a Joker. I literally could not believe my eyes when this helmet was released and I saw the Joker card, what a fucking silly old man....I really wonder if he felt nostalgic having cards on his helmet again or if he didn't think about it all and was just like, "ah cards because Vegas!!!"
III. Why Does This Matter?
*The rest of the post was factual, this is moreso my personal thoughts on the symbolism of the cards/designs
This post spawned from me recently watching the 2010 Bahrain gp and noticing "hey wait a minute...are those CARDS ON THE BACK OF HIS HELMET!?" It's a really tiny detail that's unfortunately covered up by the HANS device pretty much whenever he's wearing the helmet, so it's really difficult to spot! But I became fascinated with the fact that he had cards on his helmet before that recent helmet, and now here we are!
There's something to me about how the design of the cards evolves over the course of six seasons from the cards being front and center to being smaller, more folded up and closer to the bottom of the helmet. As I said, the 2012-2013 ones genuinely made me depressed because it feels, symbolically, like his hopes for getting another Ace are becoming more and more unlikely and falling away until they eventually fall falt and fade away entirely after 2013 and disappear for basically a decade.
But when they return? They're not the same cards! Instead of representing Fernando's championships, they now represent him as a person, displaying his driver number and his persona of being a Joker!! Though I do think it's interesting he happened to keep the Ace of Hearts, even though he talked more about the Ace of Clubs before. I'm not sure it's actually this deep in reality, but I like to think that it's him not letting his championships(and the lack thereof) define him, but rather letting who he is as a person shine and be the centerpoint instead! But on a sadder note, as @suzuki-ecstar said to me, maybe the Aces aren't there anymore because he's lost all hope for a chance at a third Ace entirely :(
#yes its finals week and im up to my eyes in coursework but instead decided to spend like 5 hours researching and writing this post#nah bcs i actually genuinely put more work into this then I think I have all semester dsfjdskjg#that thing about him using a condom and teddy bear in a magic trick genuinely had me crying with laugher. actual tears rolling down my face#<- HOW!?!? WHAT WAS THE TRICK?? its literally inconceivable to me what he did. oh if only there were pics UGH#anyways!! this post was a lot of fun to make!! i really really love the symbolism and design of helmets so this was a rly fun project#and i also went down a lot of rabbitholes while make this and saw many very weird articles from yore#i feel like i make an equal amnt of deranged posts abt seb and nando but i dont know why nando is gifted w all my well researched projects#<- i.e. chair post. that was the same level of research as this one but at least this one i could find actual sources about....#idk theres smth about the extremely long history of nando's history that evokes research posts like this KLAJSLSKDJ#theres just so much that i dont think I ever really see people discussing! so i must create.#haha what was that joke tag i wanted to make abt my researched posts? I think:#normal posts that catie normally makes in a normal fashion#<- one day ill go back and actually tag posts w that. bcs the amtn of research compared to my actual schoolwork is so unwell#fernando alonso#fa14#f1#formula 1#catie.rambling.txt#we do a little bit of f1
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Hi I really love your works and can't stop rereading them, you're such an amazing author.
Now I saw you were doing some prompts so I was wondering if you can do Kick Schumacher + 40
And have a nice day:)
040. a dusty antiques shop full of relics w/ MS47.
— part of a series of drabbles! <3
when your uncle decided to move to the caribbean with his wife, he left you his old antique store. it was in the middle of paris, and you needed a change from your old normal. making the move from your home country to paris was a big adjustment but you powered through. the shop wasn’t always busy but the occasional customer usually bought enough to keep the lights on.
you were reading one of your favourite novels when a blond guy stumbled in, probably seeking shelter from paris’ torrential rain. he was soaked to the bone as he stood up and saw you. he smiled and waved a hand. you nodded and went back to your book.
he started looking around the store but eventually, he walked up to the counter. his gaze on the book in your hands.
“nice day for reading, huh?” his voice carrying a hint of amusement despite the exhaustion in it. you looked at him, meeting his gaze with a polite smile.
“indeed it is,” you gestured at the rain-soaked streets outside. “perfect excuse to stay indoors.”
he laughed lightly, his eyes crinkling in the corners. “can’t argue with that logic.” then, after a moment’s hesitation, he added, “mind if i have a browse for a bit? i could use a distraction.”
“of course. take as long as you’d like. let me know if you need any specific help.”
one thing that you didn’t tell a lot of people was that the antique shop wasn’t a normal antique shop. over the years, you had noticed a pattern - the shop had a knack for attracting people who were grappling with their own inner battles, whether it was heartbreak, weariness, or simply a longing for connection. your uncle had always simply referred to it as "magic," but you couldn't quite put a name to it yet. that’s why you were able to keep the lights on, the shop didn’t allow time-wasters.
you wondered what brought him to its doors.
as the blond stranger continued to explore the shop, you couldn't shake the feeling that his presence here was more than mere chance.
you watched as he paused before a display of antique photographs, his fingers tracing the faded edges of the frame with a gentle reverence.
unable to resist the pull of curiosity, you approached him quietly. "finding anything interesting?" you asked, your voice soft.
he glanced up, his eyes meeting yours with a warmth that sent a shiver down your spine. "just looking at the stories these photographs hold," he replied, a faint smile tugging at the corners of his lips.
you nodded, a knowing smile playing on your lips. "they do have a way of doing that," you agreed, your gaze lingering on his face. "you know, some say this shop has a certain... magic to it. that it has a way of drawing in those who need it most."
his eyes widened in understanding, a silent acknowledgment passing between you. "i can believe that," he murmured, his voice barely above a whisper. "there's definitely something special about this place."
in that moment, you felt a surge of emotion welling up inside you, a longing to share the secrets of the shop with this enigmatic stranger. and as the rain continued to patter against the windows, you found yourself drawn to him in a way you couldn't quite explain.
"i'm y/n, by the way," you said, extending your hand in greeting.
he took it, his touch sending a jolt of electricity through you. "mick," he replied, his smile widening into a grin that lit up the room.
and as you stood there, hand in hand, surrounded by the timeless antiques, you couldn't help but feel that perhaps, just perhaps, fate had brought him to your door for a reason.
#idk what this was#magical realism#???#also thank u for the compliment!! im so glad u enjoy my work!! :D#ham1lton’s drabbles 🝮#formula one x reader#f1 x reader#f1 imagine#formula 1 x reader#formula 1 imagine#f1 fanfic#mick schumacher x reader#mick schumacher x y/n#ms47 x reader
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WHAT DO YOU MEAN nico rosberg got to hear the black dog live before i did??????
#what does he know about the magic fabric of our dreaming old habits die screaming.... nvm#nico rosberg#f1#formula 1#taylor swift
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doodles that have been in my head today lol. im sorry phaesus you're just amicable and easy to pick on
#dragon's dogma 2#dd2#dragon's dogma#arisen#dragonsplague#i think for like a month i've been thinking abt my arisen being like 'this man has an interesting inventory but his formulas could use work#she's def dabbled in dark magics as well so it's a little funny to me thinking abt their interactions. i like him tbc#pawn#breezyarts#phaesus looks so normal and then my characters are like: sailor moon beam#what are ya gonna do. LKJSDKJLGSDG#dd2 spoilers#maybe?#Very vague.#ch: adamaris solvesal#ch: yvaine
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Do I understand brocedes? NO
Do I want to understand brocedes? Also No
Do I still stand mesmerized like an ipad baby watching cocomelon to every single brocedes dramatic tiktok video ? YES absolutely and it destroys me every time
#formula one fandom#formula 1#lewis hamilton#nico rosberg#brocedes#i know they were like best friends#but then there was a ugly crash#and now they dont talk to each other anymore#but also they live in the same building in monaco apparently?#which what in the fanfic is that?#i dont want to dig deeper#i fell like if i know anything else it will lose its magic
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exploring klingon ridge variation!
#star trek#my art#klingons#in my head in small enough towns people can identify members of a certain house by the ridges#klingon voice eyes that cut like steel and ridges that look to the skies.... surely you are a son of d'kar#is sirella wearing a princess bubblegum crown yes. did i draw b'elanna twice in a giddy stupor yes. does ch'rega look like some kind#of 2000s magical girl. also yes SORRY its all i got ok its honest work#respectfully i know the ridges have kind of a formula to them but i think they should get freaky with it#also i like to think they call it fire blossom cause when it blooms it smells like smoke everywhere. so unsafe. yay ♥️#miral when b'elanna's playing with live wires for the latest attempt to handcraft an android: smells like home <3 :)#i'll never let go of little mad scientist b'elanna#also i can never decide how i wanna draw b'elanna and specifically her hair curly wavy straightened bangs no bangs? side bangs? who knows..#someguy with a gun: quickly what does b'elanna look like#me: just shoot i can't do this
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higuchi sensei when it's time to cook up the guy that'll be falling in love with the main character in one of her little stories
#she has a formula. and she sticks to it. respect#would give up my kidney to read vol 2 of yasashii watashi. like im invested#so curious abt what other stories she couldve written if oofie hadnt become like her 20+ yr long magnum opus for realsies .#shes so epic at writing. human beings in love. like the mundanity and magic of it#wahhh wabhhh well we get abemiha endgame in the end so its alright 🙂#<- leave me be
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Thought of the day : you know what's frustrating with (I think it was first USAmerican or social medias at least) censure habit ? Or whatever you want to call it. It's that by censoring every slur, every bad words every words you don't like, it has an annoying side effect. I have no fucking idea what you're talking about. Zero, nada, niet. Because English is not my native language and I don't know every slur (or just every words) and when you're talking about "random-letter word" it could be anything, even the most random thing ever, and I will have no idea. And I can't even educate myself and learn "ah, this word means that insult, copy", because I have no idea what word you're talking about !!!!
#and that is without saying that words are just words and there is no censure on Tumblr so use death and suicide or whatever as they are#(and why the fuck are you censoring ship names ???? they're not voldemort for fuck sake they wont come if you say their name)#just please stop censoring. words are words not magic formulas of bad things#anyway. i've read another post where i only had a vague idea what was the offense done because the poster wouldn't repeat a slur#sigh in non native speaker#this is a vent post#hi tumblr void#hasta rambles
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I like to believe he runs his own social media
#fernando alonso#magic alonso#formula 1#F1#aston martin#aston martin aramco f1#george russell#russell george#mercedes#mercedes amg petronas#mercedes amg f1#mercedes amg petronas f1#I feel like toto trying to work out what the merc team's official name is
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april's fool
#haha get it. april fools except the S is on the april#detective conan#magic kaito#kaitou KID#art tag#probably the messiest piece im willing to post on here. i just wanted to draw something for 04/01 because i missed his birthday last year#so what fool would i be to pass this other significant event..! happy 26 (?) years to the scene that changed my brain chemistry#ok thats all listen to LOVE FORMULA ~FREEDOM~ by TWO-MIX. my final words (passes away)
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2023 Bahrain Grand Prix - Fernando Alonso(ft. Max Verstappen, Checo Perez & Lance Stroll)(my personal post-race highlights)
#GUYS YOU KNOW I JUST THOUGHT OF THE PERFECT SONG FOR THIS OCCASION#'Every Little Thing She Does Is Magic' - The Police(like magic alonso you get it you get it??)#pls go listen to it bcs its what I listened to while making this post bcs it rly reminds me of nando hehehe#i def cried a bit while watching this i was just so happy for everything both he and the team have achieved#and not to harp on abt 2005 but ig its crazy for me to have been spending a lot of time watching his wdc season#and then start the new season and see him up in p3!! its just so cool and it makes me a bit emo but in a good way ofc!#also sry if this is a little late! i was changing up w how i wanted to go abt doing this and it took longer than i wouldve liked#i think the most interesting thing abt doing this was just how different the post-race proceedings are compared to 2005#fernando alonso#2023 bahrain grand prix#we do a little bit of f1#fa14#checo perez#max verstappen#(2023: 1/23 races watched)#f1#formula 1#formula one#2023 bahrain gp#lance stroll
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one thing about jane remover is she knows exactly how many sections of a song there needs to be always
#i’m so sick of the 2 min 30 second song length plague#i want the bridges and the outros and extra verses god pleaseee#jane remover#never has this problem she always lets a song be exactly what it needs to be and i am eternally grateful#for example some artists would end magic i want u after the second chorus and thank god thats not the case#also like structure wise jane remover songs are always doing whatever they gotta do#there’s such a variety and of course it’s fine to be formulaic but i love when artists play with structure#depending on what a song calls for
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God. Okay. Makes 100% sense now why Adams changed Jai's powers.
He made Jai the demolitions expert. And started hyping up Jai's new obsession with spy stuff. And had Jay do stealth missions. And has him writing mission logs during recess.
Adams 100% is making Jai the 'spy kid' of this new team.
Adams is hyping Maxine's magic because she's the magic kid. Irey is the speedster. Jai is the spy kid. Bobby is the super strong invulnerable powerhouse. Cerdian is the Atlantean.
Now the question is: does editorial let him add Lian as the archer? Does editorial let him add Mar'i as the alien? Or does he have to get one of the Kent kids for the alien spot?
Can he add Tai as their energy construct kid????
#YEAH THIS IS THE FORMULA FOR YJ SEASON ONE ACTUALLY#YES IM PRETTY SURE THATS WHAT HES GOING FOR ACTUALLY#No legit though Adams keeps referencing that show#he gave Flash and Kid Flash stealth suits for gods sake#he made Wally dislike magic which was a yja thing and had Wally call Zatanna 'Zee'. which again. is a yja thing#he put happy harbor and the cave in a shot and it was from yja and not the actual yj comics series#he had wally repeat a line from the show almost verbatim#plus he gave Wally a nickname VERY SIMILAR TO 'WALL-MAN'#also he wrote for the show#so.... fairly confident he has watched it and likes it and i think hes using season one as his template#which honestly????#hell yeah#good for him#season one was fucking awesome#dc#dc comics
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The relief and pride of posting a chapter and immediately checking your email first thing in the morning hoping to see AO3 notifs to depression pipeline
#not actually depressed i just keep comparing the engagement of the first version to this one#was it bc i updated so frequently? whats the magic formula to make the numbers go up and hit the dopamine button
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