#what was it everyone went around saying in 2020? no thoughts head empty? yeah it was like that

[ashtcnirwin]

how badly did work drain me today?

well, when i was in the shower just now, i was scrubbing off some ink on my left arm from when i hastily jotted down a bunch of vitals there mid-shift, and when i was done with that, i moved onto the ink on my right arm

to attempt to scrub off my tattoo

took me a good five seconds to realise why it wouldn't budge

[watchmegetobsessed]

Waiting for you - Harry Styles

❄️ FANFICmas 2020 ❄️

Read more about FANFICmas here!

i wrote it over like a month ago, but kept it for today, i hope yall will like it! it’s a cute bestfriends to lovers fic, so yeah... happy holidays, hope you are having an amazing time!

word count: 13k

masterlist

Harry Styles has been a household name around your home, but not for the reason many would think. While for the rest of the world he was the famous singer, former member of One Direction and recent solo artist, the guy who performs at the biggest arenas, wins awards and sings his heart out through the radio, for you and your mom he was the goofy, curly haired boy who lived across the street with his mum, sister and stepdad.

You still remember all too clear the first time you met him. You and your mum just moved into your new home after the nasty divorce of your parents, ready to start a new life. You’ve barely turned twelve, it was quite the awkward stage of your teenage years, you were still trying to find yourself on the rocky road of growing up. Moving to a whole new town and switching schools were terrifying and you had quite a few nightmares about possible outcomes of being the new girl in the neighborhood.

You and your mum just finished unpacking the dishes in the kitchen when the doorbell rang. She rushed to answer it and you wandered behind her, curiously peeking at the guests under her arm as she held the door open.

“Hi! We saw the trucks and thought we would say hi! I’m Anne and this is my son, Harry,” the nice woman greeted your mum and stepping aside she gestured towards the teenage boy standing next to her.

His green eyes fell to you almost immediately and you forgot to breathe for a moment. You were not the kind to crush that easily on guys, well, not until you laid your eyes on Harry. He smirked at you, nodding in your way in such an easy-going manner and you could feel the heat crawling up your neck to your cheeks and ears.

Anne and your mum quickly became good friends. She was the rock your mum definitely needed after such a bad year behind her and you were glad she found support in such a wonderful woman as Anne. Their newly funded friendship got stronger day by day until the two families just… simply felt one.

Growing up the Styles siblings and Anne came and go in your home as if they lived there too. On many occasions you came home from school only to find Anne in the kitchen while your mother wasn’t even home. Anne always knew when your mum was working the night shift at the hospital where she was a nurse and always made sure you had a warm dinner on those evenings, often inviting you over to just stay at theirs while your mum was away working. Birthdays, graduations, Easters and Christmases, they were all spent at either yours or at the Styles home, strengthening the bond between the two families.

You have always had a strong friendship with Gemma, but maybe because you were closer in age or for something else, but you became the closest with Harry. Two peas in a pod, as your mums liked to call the two of you. You weren’t just neighbors or good friends, it was clear to anyone and to both of you as well that you were the best of friends. You were there for each other at the best and worst of times, before and after Harry’s launch to stardom. You were there with him all along, sometimes physically, sometimes just through text messages and reassuring calls when he just needed a piece of his home away from home. Late night calls and talks were your usual when he was on the road and he made sure to only talk about his life after you’ve told him everything about yours, even if the most interesting thing was that you were able to buy three socks for the price of two. Harry listened and cared for everything that happened to you, not letting you think even for a moment that he would forget about his best friend when he is on the other side of the planet.

The two of you grew up together and while his life consisted of concerts, screaming fans, telly appearances and award shows, your mundane everydays went on the same was as any normal young girl’s: you graduated from high school, went to uni and then started a career for yourself. As time was moving it became a little more and more complicated to stay as close as you used to, though, both of you terribly busy with your own personal lives, so the calls, texts and meetings became less frequent, but you were always able to pick up from where you left, it was as easy with him as it could be.

Maybe that’s why you grew to love him in a more than friendly way through the years. Slowly, but surely you started to realize what an amazing man he really was –is. It was impossible not to fall for him, however you valued your close friendship more than to just ruin it with dropping a bomb on Harry. You always thought he doesn’t feel the same way, so you were sadly left with your daydreams and fantasies about him only your bedroom walls heard.

This year it’s gonna be the tenth Christmas you get to celebrate together, quite the anniversary. There were only two years when you didn’t see each other during the holidays, the first one because you and your mum spent it in Canada with some relatives that live there, and the second one was because Harry couldn’t come home a few years ago, having a too tight schedule. But this year, everyone made sure to make it back home in time. Harry called you three month before Christmas to check in if you are still gonna coming home.

“Would be an idiot not to. Can’t wait to stuff my head with cookies!” you chuckled.

“Have you found your sweater yet?” Harry questioned, the muffled noise of the traffic around him broke through the line as he was on his way home when he called.

“Not yet. But I’ve been looking. I’m pretty sure I’m gonna win this year,” you smirked in victory.

“Oh, not so fast with the assumptions, little girl!” he warned you making you laugh.

The two of you had a kind of tradition. Every year, you go on mission to find the ugliest Christmas sweaters one could find, and then perform a chosen song at the karaoke machine after dinner, entertaining the rest of the family. Those performances are the best memories you nurse. Your absolute favorite one was just a couple of years ago when Harry’s sweater was filled with weird looking reindeers in quite inappropriate poses, he even added a glittery pair of sunnies and he sang I Want To Break Free from the Queen. Everyone was on the floor laughing as he took the living room by storm as if it was the Maddison Square Garden filled with thousands of screaming fans, while it was just the five of you.

He won that year, Hell, even you voted on him, giving him the cleanest win of all times, but you swore to live up to that performance and you really feel like this year is gonna be your chance to live up to that promise. You have quite some tricks up your sleeves.

These past couple of years you were anxiously waiting for the holidays to roll around, because you knew you would get to spend so much time with Harry and through the year, even with several occasions of the two of you meeting, you missed him dearly. Sometimes you selfishly wished he would have just stayed the boy across the street so your lives could take tracks that run at least close to each other, but you always reminded yourself that his work was his life and you would have never taken away his true passion and happiness. Besides, you love watching him perform from time to time, that was just one of your favorite sides of him, see his eyes shine so bright as he sang to his fans. You used to envy the fangirls, it always seemed like he had a special connection with them, but you realized that you were one of them. You felt the same excitement when he stepped on the stage, you bought all his albums, even though he made sure you’d be one of the first people to get your hands on it. You had a second copy of them, because buying it gave you the extra jolt of happiness and the feeling that you were a tiny part of his success too. You watched all his music videos, knew the lyrics to his songs and cheered on him whenever he won another award. Difference was that at the end of the day you could call him and tell him how proud you were of him and he stared back at you with that beautiful grin, his dimples digging deep in his cheeks, telling you that he wouldn’t be here without you. You always knew he just said it to make you feel special, but he insisted it was the truth.

“I’m telling you. It you weren’t with me I would have gone crazy already, pulling a Justin Bieber or summat. Don’t think you are any less than what you are, that’s just daft.”

Every time he said something along those lines those damned butterflies in your stomach went crazy and you tried your best to ignore them. You didn’t always succeed, but the effort was there.

 Now it’s two days before Christmas and you are already standing in your old room after coming home from London, leaving your small but cozy little apartment empty until the next year. The walls are still the same lilac color you chose when you were fourteen, a twin bed is pushed against the wall under your window, the wardrobe’s door is littered with old pictures from high school and ones you cut out from magazines. You just never got around to take them down and after a while it brought you a comforting sense every time you came home. A warm nostalgia took over you when you saw them, so they eventually stayed.

Your suitcase is lying on the floor as you unpack some stuff you’ll be using often during your stay, but you don’t get far in the packing when you hear an all too familiar voice coming from downstairs. Leaving your stuff as it is you rush down and throw your arms around Anne from behind, who is standing in the kitchen with your mum.

“My sweet angel! How are you?!” she cheers turning around in your hold to hug you back, giving you a tight squeeze before she pushes you away so she can have a good look on you. “Swear you get prettier every time I see you!”

“Stop it, my head’s gonna get big,” you chuckle feeling yourself blushing a little.

“Never gonna stop praising my daughter,” she smiles and gifts you with a cheeky wink.

Anne was never shy to let you know that she thought of you as a second daughter and you still remember how it felt when she called you that for the first time. It felt nice to know that you could count on her no matter what.

The three of you chat in the kitchen, Anne asks you about your job and how things have been going, she hasn’t seen you in a while. You missed the times when you could just go across the street and have a talk with her whenever you wanted, but since you’ve moved to London, Harry wasn’t the only one you didn’t get to see as often as you would have wanted. Your job and life overall got you so busy sometimes, you barely had time to call your own mum.

“Harry is arriving this evening. Wanna come with us to fetch him up at the airport?” she asks you and of course you say yes. You wouldn’t miss the chance to greet him with a bone crushing hug just after he lands.

However, as the time nears when you’d have to leave to the airport, Anne calls you up and asks if you could go on your own.

“I didn’t finish cooking and Gems is in an online meeting. Would you mind if you went alone?” she asks and though it sounds a little made up, you don’t question her.

On your way to the airport you are nervously drumming on the wheel, the thought of seeing Harry excites and worries you a little. It’s been months since you last seen him in the flesh and though you’ve talked plenty of times on the phone and in video calls, it’s just not the same. You find yourself wondering if he still smells the same, if you’ll fit the same way into his embrace as before. When you were younger you often liked to think about the two of you as two pieces of legos when you hugged. Your frame just fitted so perfectly against his body, he was your absolutely favorite person to hug.

Standing in a corner at the terminal, you keep checking the board until his flight’s status changes to landed. Then your eyes are glued to the sliding glass doors, knowing well it’s gonna take him some time to get his bags and walk out, but you are just way too excited to finally see him again.

People start walking through the doors and your head perks up every time you see a slightly tall frame, only to realize it’s still not him. Until it is.

You can’t bite your growing smile back when you spot him, a beanie and the hood of his hoodie covering his mop of hair, sunnies hiding his eyes, but you’d recognize him even from just the tiniest detail. You push yourself away from the wall as you see him look around, probably searching for his mum and sister, because he was already on his way when Anne decided it’s gonna be you who fetches him up, so he doesn’t know about the change.

“Excuse me, can I get a picture?” you ask teasingly walking up to him and for a moment you can tell he believes it’s a fan who recognized him, but his face quickly changes once his eyes land on you.

“Fo’ fuck’s sake, you had me for a second,” he breathes out, his arms already reaching out to pull you against him and you gladly envelop yourself into his hold. “What are you doing here?” he mumbles tightening his arms around you, and you don’t mind it. As you face is pressed into his shoulder you smile when you realize that he still smells the same. Like home.

“Your mum asked me to come and get you because she didn’t finish cooking. But if you ask me she just wanted to surprise you with me. You happy to see me?” you smirk up at him letting your head fall back so you could look into his eyes.

“Always,” he grins before placing a soft kiss to your temple and letting go of you.

The two of you leave the terminal before anyone could recognize him and packing his stuff up into the car you head back home.

You hand your phone over to him once you hit the road so he can be in charge of the music and it’s no surprise when he starts playing Christmas music straight away. Grinning to yourself you glance over at him and see him scrolling through your camera roll like the nosy little gremlin that he is.

“Hey! I did not give you permission to snoop around my phone!” you warn him, but don’t try to snatch it away from him, there’s really nothing he shouldn’t see, besides, half of those pics have been sent to him through messages.

“Just tryna catch up w’ you,” he mumbles under his breath, continuously opening up photos he is interested in. “New couch, eh?” he asks showing you the screen for a second.

“Yeah, bought it a few weeks ago. You like it?”

“Looks comfy. I should try it out sometime.”

“You never sleep on my couch, what are you talking about?”

“Right, you always drag me t’ your bed,” he snorts and you gasp at him, smacking his chest gently.

“That’s so not true! You always just arbitrarily make yourself comfortable in my bed and I don’t have the heart to kick you out,” you correct him.

There hasn’t been many times when Harry crashed at your place, but when he did, he always slept in your bed with you, and the two of you have shared a bed a few other times prior too. It’s nothing new, though it does have a deeper meaning for you than for him, you think. Waking up with Harry snoring lightly next to you, admiring how peaceful and beautiful he is in this intimate state, you just wish you could see him like this all the time.

Harry smirks at you cheekily, scrunching his nose as he chuckles.

“’Cause I wouldn’t want to sleep anywhere else, Love,” he says before turning his attention back to your phone while you try to ignore the butterflies in your stomach at the nickname.

It’s quite late by the time you get home, you’ve run into some traffic, but it just meant more time with Harry. You gladly listened to his stories and you are happy you got some alone time with him. Parking up to your driveway you help him unload his bags before locking the car.

“Wanna go to the Christmas market in the morning? Promised Gemma I’d go with her and Michal,” he asks, slowly walking down the driveway towards his home.

“Uh, sure,” you nod smiling. Not that you had any other plans, the holidays are reserved for family and the Styles’ are family.

“Great, I’ll be here at ten. And thanks for the ride,” he smirks waving goodbye and you watch him cross the street before he disappears in his home and you do the same.

“Y/N? Is that you?” your mum calls out when you walk in.

“Were you expecting anyone else?” you ask, hanging your coat before you join her in the living room.

“Not,” she smiles giddily. “Was everything alright at the airport?”

You throw your legs over her lap and she squeezes your ankles playfully.

“Yeah, everything fine.”

“How is Harry?”

“Cheeky and smug, as always,” you huff smirking.

“Can’t wait to see him. I feel like I haven’t seen ‘im in ages.”

“When are they coming over tomorrow?”

“Anne said she’ll come around four to help me cook, the rest I don’t know. Dinner will be done around seven though.”

“I’m pretty sure Gemma and Harry will be here along with Anne,” you snort, knowing well they wouldn’t miss a chance to come over, especially Harry. He has been talking nonstop how he’ll be glued to your hip once he is back home, making up for all the time you’ve spent apart.

“They surely will,” your mum chuckles before you both turn your attention at the telly.

You go to bed way after midnight and finish up the packing you left abruptly when you left to get Harry. Shuffling around in your room you glance out the window and see that the light in Harry’s room is on too. Peeking out you lean against the window’s frame, thinking about the times when the two of you sat in the window, talking on the phone after curfew, keeping your voice down so your parents didn’t wake up, sharing secrets and your silliest thoughts. With Harry, you never felt like you had to keep anything back, he would have never judged you for anything, you could be your true self around him and vice versa.

A tall figure appears at the window and as Harry glances out his window he is quick to see you sitting on the window sill, your head resting against the frame. The two houses are not far away from each other and you see him grinning as he sits at the window as well, pulling out his phone, a moment later yours starts buzzing on the nightstand. You quickly grab it, and go back to the window.

“Creeping on me, eh?” he hums into the phone and you roll your eyes at him.

“Was just admiring the street lights, don’t flatter yourself, your head is getting too big,” you huff, but you can’t push your smirk down.

“Admit it, you were hoping to see me roam around naked, weren’t you?”

“As if I haven’t seen you like that before,” you snort making him laugh too. It’s true, Harry has never been shy to get rid of his clothes and he also doesn’t bother to draw the blinds whenever he is changing. You once saw him butt naked when he was nineteen, and when you told him to close the blinds next time he is changing, he just shrugged with a smug smile.

“’M not ashamed of anything, Love,” he told you and you had to turn away because you were blushing for sure.

“Right, you’re a fan of putting yourself on full display when you’re naked, almost forgot,” you chuckle shaking your head. “Millions of girls have the picture of you, lying naked on their walls.”

“You one of them?” he cheekily asks.

“Nah, doesn’t go well with the vibe of my apartment.”

“Shame. Though I think it would definitely look amazin’ above your bed, Love.”

“Now would it? I don’t know about that.”

“I’ll get you a copy framed,” he smirks and you can see it clear even from the distance. “Y’ know what? I’ll make you an exclusive one. One that nobody else has, how does that sound?”

“I can’t believe you, Styles,” you chuckle shaking your head. “I’m not gonna answer this, just gonna head to bed. You should too.”

“So we’re not sharing any secrets like we used to? Thought you’d have something fo’ me.”

“You know everything, Harry,” you sigh with a soft smile, though your heart skips a beat. He does know everything, except one big, fat, heavy secret you’ve been carrying around for way too long, that will probably stay with you forever.

“Right. Okay, I’ll see you tomorrow.” “Night, Harry.”

“Good night, Love,” he murmurs and you know he is smiling, thought he steps away from the window as he says goodbye and you do the same before ending the call.

 ***

 “Hey! That’s mine!” you protest as Harry steals another roasted chestnut from your little paper bag, but you can’t stay mad at him when he is smiling at you so sweetly.

“Sorry, tastes better when it’s someone else’s.”

“Sure,” you snort and just let him get as many as he wants. You wouldn’t have eaten it all anyway.

It’s quite cold out in the town, but at least there’s no rain or storm, so the weather didn’t try to ruin your little trip to the Christmas market.

Gemma calls out for Harry to show him something and you just keep wandering between the booths, enjoying the atmosphere quite a lot, you have no idea when was the last time you got to come to the market, though you always loved coming when you were younger.

Finishing up your chestnuts you throw the paper bag into a trash can and turn around to find the rest of your little group, spotting Harry and Gemma deep in discussion next to a booth that offers handmade ceramic mugs. As you walk closer it almost seems like as if they were having a fight, which is just odd, they rarely do that.

“Just get your head out of your arse!” you catch Gemma telling her brother who only groans in frustration before he spots you, a smile plastering across his face.

“Hey, there you are!” he beams.

“Everything alright?” you ask looking at them.

“Sure, just Gemma is being a little nosy, is all,” Harry waves in dismiss. You glance over to Gems, but she is already back in discussion with Michal so you decide to drop it. “You ate all the chestnuts?” Harry asks offended, throwing an arm around your shoulders.

“Well, it was mine, so of course I ate them!”

“Selfish,” he narrows his eyes at you, but you both know it’s just a joke.

You walk further down in the aisle, occasionally stopping at some of the booth when you spot a place that offers hot chocolate in cute little mugs that you can take home with you if you’d like, or just take it back and get your money back.

“Oh look!” you gasp excitedly and head towards the hot chocolate booth. The old lady smiles brightly at the two of you as you take a look at all the choices. “Oh my god, they have caramel flavored!” you cheer, basically already drooling at the thought of a good, caramel flavored hot chocolate.

“What can I get for the lovely couple?” the lady smiles warmly at the two of you and you freeze at her assumption.

“Oh we—“ you start, but Harry cuts you off.

“A caramel flavored and a plain one, please,” he orders, without even batting an eye about how the lady just called you a couple. You can feel your cheeks heating up at the thought, but you try to calm yourself. He probably just didn’t want to get into explaining that you two are not an item and let her think what she wanted.

The nice lady hands you your mug and you take Harry’s as well as he pays for both of them. You would try to argue with him and pay yours, but you are already used to how stubborn he is and he never lets you split anything, it’s always on him.

“Thank you, have a nice day!” Harry calls out to the lady before the two of you leave. You peek at him handing him his mug, looking for any clue that would give away if this little scene got him just as bothered as it did you, but he looks perfectly fine and relaxed, so you decide not to bring it up. You’re sure he didn’t think much of it.

Your little stroll stretches into the afternoon, the four of you decide to have lunch out there too, then you just opt for a walk in town as Gemma wants to do a quick last minute Christmas shopping, so by the time you get home Anne is already over at yours helping your mum with dinner. Tonight you are all eating at yours, then tomorrow it’s the Styles’ turn to host, this is how you agreed this year.

“Woah, it smells amazing!” you call out walking into the house. The delicious smells fill up the whole place and you hear the two women giggling in the kitchen.

“Hi Honey, how was the market?” your mum greets you, a glass of red wine in her hand and the same goes for Anne.

“Great, we have a new mug,” you say holding up the emptied out hot chocolate mug. Stepping to the sink you wash it quickly and drying off you put it away in one of the cabinets.

You stick around in the kitchen and not so much later Harry comes over, the two of you leave your mums alone and get comfortable in front of the telly.

All channels are filled with holiday movies and you don’t mind, really, you like them all even if you’ve seen them a million times, you still find them funny and cute. Harry feels the same way, so when you settle on Love Actually he doesn’t say a word.

What startles you is that he grabs your ankles and pulls your legs over his lap, a small shriek escaping your mouth since you weren’t expecting him to do that. You’re sitting sideways, your legs are bent at the knee and Harry is kind of hugging them as his eyes are glued to the screen.

You find it rather hard to focus on the movie when Harry’s fingers keep fidgeting on your legs, they keep running up and down, sometimes he lays his hands flat on your knees, there’s no spot he hasn’t touched since you started watching the movie.

About an hour into the film he turns to you and you look at him in question.

“’M in the mood to cuddle,” he announces and starts moving around, not even letting you protest as he basically crawls to your lap, resting his head on your stomach as the two of you lay on the couch.

“Am I now your personal pillow?” you ask chuckling, but you wouldn’t want him to move for anything. Feeling him weigh down on you just feels so warm and simple but amazing.

“The best one,” he mumbles, bringing a hand to your side as you let your fingers comb through his curls.

You keep massaging his scalp and he lets out soft moans when you go over a soft spot, you can’t help but chuckle as he melts under your hands. His fingers start drawing circles on your side and the movie is long forgotten by you, all you can focus on is how great it is to have Harry so close to you. He is known to be a physical person, you are used to hugs and touches, but it seems like he is a little needier now than the usual.

You don’t mind it though, you just try to enjoy the moment, because it can end anytime.

Gemma and Michal come over a little before seven, and while your mums finish up the cooking the four of you set the table. You grab the crystal glasses and start placing them to the table, Harry lending you a hand. Once the table is all set you shuffle into the kitchen to see if there’s anything you can help with, Harry following you behind, placing a hand to the small of your back.

As you stand and wait for you mum to finish up the meals so you can help carry them to the table you feel Harry’s hand wander over to your hip, giving it a squeeze as he stands closer, so his chest is pressed against your back.

“Harry?” you ask a little out of breath.

“Hm?” he innocently hums.

“What’s with you today?” Turning your head to the side your eyes lock with his, but he just shrugs smiling.

“Guess I just missed yeh a lot.”

“You’re weird,” you chuckle shaking your head, but don’t make an effort to push him away. His touch feels way too good to put an end to it and you just want to be selfish a little longer.

His hands leave you when the two of you help to bring the food to the table, and you almost wish they would just return, but you gotta swallow the thought.

The food is amazing, as always. You all sip on some wine, just having a genuinely good time, enjoying that all of you are back at one place, something that rarely happens now that all three of you kids are all grown up.

At one point Harry rests his arm on the back of your chair, no one seems to notice but you. All these little things have been driving you crazy all day and your mind seems to be playing a nasty game with you. There’s no way Harry thinks of these details more than what they are, a friendly gesture towards an old friend of his.

When Gemma is telling a story about some weird guy she met at work Harry reaches up and pushes your hair behind your ear, his finger lingering over your neck a little longer than you would have expected. Turning to face him you give him a questioning look, not sure what to think about his needy and touchy self all of a sudden.

“What?” you mouth him, but he just smiles at you absentmindedly, curling a strand of hair around his finger, playing with it for a moment before letting go of it and going for another lock. You reach up and pull his hand away, feeling yourself heating up from his touch, but when you are about to let go of his hand he grabs yours, lacing your fingers together with yours as he rests them on his thigh.

“Harry…” you breathe out, glancing at the others, relieved to see that they are not paying much attention to the two of you.

“What? Am I not allowed to touch you?” he asks with a smug smirk and you roll your eyes at him.

“As I said, you’re weird,” you mumble under your breath looking down at your now empty plate. Harry gives your hand a squeeze.

“But like, the good kind of weird, yeah?”

“Shut up,” you chuckle shaking your head at him.

You try to tell yourself he is just needy because it’s been so long since you last saw each other. It can’t be more, you push even the smallest thought to the back of your mind, though it surely lingers there throughout the evening.

He helps you with washing the dishes, you stand arm to arm at the sink as you scrub the plates and hand over to him for drying. He gently hums to himself all along, swaying his hips, bumping against yours. At first you resist it, but then you catch the rhythm and start moving along, so your hips meet in the middle before swinging to the opposite side.

“What’s the song?” you ask finishing up the last plate.

“Just something random,” he shrugs smirking over at you. You hand him the last plate, he is still singing, making up gibberish lyrics to his song and once he puts the plate down he throws the kitchen cloth to the counter and easily grabs your waist pulling you against him as he starts swaying with you to his impromptu song. You let out a small shriek at the sudden movement, but eventually melt into his hold. The humming slowly turns into an all too familiar melody as Harry starts singing Sweet Creature into your ear, slow dancing in the kitchen while you hear your mums and Gemma laugh outside somewhere.

Your hands run up his arms and stop behind his neck as you lock your fingers and let him hold you close, his palms are pressed to your waist, fingers gently stroking you through the fabric of your shirt. You take a deep breath and his cologne fills your nose, one of your favorite scents, sometimes you just wish you could spray it on your pillow so it would always smell like him.

“Sweet creature, wherever I go, you bring me home…” he softly sings, leaning back just enough for your eyes to meet. It feels like your heart is about to burst out of your chest, it’s not the first time you feel so intimidated by him, like you could pass out any moment, but this is a little different. As if his eyes were telling you another story, but you can’t completely make up the words.

“Sweet creature, when I run out of road, you bring me home, you’ll bring me home.” He finishes the song, hums the closing melody and you watch him in complete awe. Your lips part when you catch his gaze move down to them and you swear you see him leaning closer, as if he is about to kiss you. Your breath gets caught in your throat, he is so close, just a few more inches and you’d taste those perfect lips of his, the ones you’ve been dreaming about for way too long.

It almost happens, it seems, but just when that last push is about to set in Gemma waltz into the kitchen and you step back faster than light, pushing him away even though the sudden lack of his touch is more painful than you were expecting.

“You guys—Oh, what’s up?” she asks stopping at the door and you feel yourself getting redder with each passing moment, the heat crawling up your neck, ears cheeks, right to the top of your head. What were you thinking? You let yourself believe Harry would ever kiss you, this whole scene was nothing more than just a friendly moment the two of you were sharing.

“I’m—sorry,” you breathe out making your way out of the kitchen, right up to your room to have some well needed space.

“Way to ruin everything,” Harry snickers at his sister.

“You joking? You wanted to kiss her in her mum’s kitchen?” Gemma snaps at him in disbelief.

“We were having a moment,” he mumbles rubbing his face with his hands. “Up until you stomped in with your big mouth.”

“Well, if you were havin’ a moment, just make it happen again.”

“As if it’s that easy, Gemma!” he scoffs throwing his hands in the air.

“Man up and tell her how you feel, don’t have to complicate it too much,” she shrugs before walking out and leaving her brother alone. Harry growls in frustration, the gears in his head turning wildly as he is trying to figure out how to come clear to you about his feelings.

 Meanwhile, up in your room you get out your laptop and busy yourself with checking up on messages and emails you’ve been ignoring, hoping that the uneasy feeling in your chest will ease very soon. Your hands were shaking when you locked yourself up in your room, but as you get focused on other tasks you slowly gain your balance back.

You kind of even forget that the Styles’ were over, you only realize that you abruptly pulled yourself out of the evening when there’s a soft knock on your door.

“Come on in!” you call out and a moment later Harry’s head pops in, eyes softly falling on your sitting figure on the bed. “Hey,” you smile at him faintly.

“Hey. Thought you were sleepin’s or summat.” Coming inside he closes the door behind him then sits on your plush rug in the middle of the room.

“Just… sorted some work related things out,” you sigh.

“Working during the holidays? Tha’s not healthy.”

“I know, I’m done,” you smile shutting the laptop down and putting it aside. “Sorry I disappeared, I just—“

“No worries,” Harry shakes his head. “Mum and Gems went home, they thought you were sleeping too, tha’s why they didn’t say goodbye.”

“Oh, alright.”

“But I thought we could have a sleepover,” he peeks at you with a boyish smile.

“What, like we did in middle school?” you chuckle.

“Yea, thought it would be fun.”

“Well, I don’t think my bed would fit us comfortably and we don’t have the mattress anymore that you used to sleep on,” you tell him looking around.

“Nonsense, I’m not tha’ big,” he insists hopping to his feet and throwing himself on the bed, ignoring that you’re already there. His body takes up more than half on the bed , limbs wrapping around you as he brings you down to the mattress next to him, you can’t help the laugh that leaves your lips.

“You’re like a gigantic baby, Harry!” you laugh as he keeps you down on the bed with his arm.

“It’s perfectly fine for two people,” he mumbles with a smirk, closing his eyes as his head sinks into your pillow.

“Do you ever get no as an answer?” you ask looking at him in awe. You can never get used to seeing him so up close, like not many get to.

“No,” he huffs in satisfaction, his arm bringing you closer to him and you just giggle at him.

“I’m not sleeping just yet, gotta have a shower first.”

“Do what you want, I’ll be here,” he mumbles but you snort at him.

“You’re not sleeping in my bed without having a shower,” you tell him before you grab your pajamas and head to the bathroom.

You have a quick shower and get done with all your evening business. Returning to your room you find Harry sitting on the floor, his back against the side of the bed as he is scrolling through his phone.

“Does mum know you’re staying over?” you ask him as you throw your used clothes into the hamper, moving around the room while feeling his eyes on you.

“Yeah. ‘S all good.”

“You need a towel?”

“Yes please,” he says pushing himself up from the floor.

“Clothes?” you ask with an arched brow. He just grins at you and it’s enough of an answer. “Here,” you give him the shirt and sweats he has left at yours quite some time ago, along with a clean towel.

“Thanks,” he smirks before leaving to occupy the bathroom.

He doesn’t take long in there, you’re lying in bed already when he returns, smelling like your shower gel, strawberry and melon.

He throws his clothes to the chair in the corner and then lies beside you on the bed. You scoot over to the wall to give him space, but he is quick to bring you closer to him once he has made himself comfortable. You lay your head on his shoulder as you are both scrolling through your phones.

When you had enough, you throw yours to the nightstand, and stay cuddled up to his side.

“Do you remember the last time I slept here?” he asks tossing his phone to the nightstand and bringing his arms around you.

“Mm, was it at my twentieth birthday?”

“Yeah. You were so wasted,” he chuckles and you smirk to yourself

“But you took good care of me.”

“I did. You were so cute, rambling about how much you love me when I took you home from the pub.”

You bite into your bottom lip. You still remember that night vividly. Your birthday party had gone a little wild and you had gotten drunker than you intended to. Luckily, he was there to bring your home and he stayed in the bathroom with you as you threw up everything you ate and drank that evening. Then he made you take a shower, got you fresh clothes out and helped you get into bed. He slept next to you that night, holding you in his arms, gently caressing your back and upper arm as you fell into your drunken slumber. In the morning you told yourself he just did what any other friend would do, helping you out when you were clearly knocked out, but he made you breakfast in the morning since your mum was working all night and morning and he stayed over later the afternoon to make sure you were alright.

What you told him in your drunken state about loving him, it wasn’t just your friendly side, it was your drunken self coming clear to him, telling him that you are in love with him, but he didn’t take it seriously and you were too ashamed and awkward to even bring it up to him after that, so it was all forgotten very soon.

Following that you planned on telling him how you feel, several times. You even wrote a little speech you planned to give him when the time comes, but you couldn’t do it. The fear of losing him if he doesn’t feel the same was stronger than you expected and every time you had the chance to come clear, you chickened out. The thought of losing him as a friend is way worse than having to push your feelings down... forever. You just can’t imagine your life without Harry in it and you can’t risk losing him.

The two of you talk for quite a while, laughing about the good old times, until you both fall asleep. Sometime in the middle of the night you wake up and feel Harry wrapped around you, his head lying on your chest as he is snoring softly. He truly is like a big baby, an arm thrown over your stomach, his legs tangled with yours. Good Lord, how amazing it feels to have him so close to you!

Reaching up you tangle your fingers through his hair gently so he doesn’t wake up, his soft curls glide between your fingers easily and lifting your head you kiss the top of his head before letting yourself drift back to sleep.

When you open your eyes the next time the situation is the opposite, you are the one cuddled up to Harry’s side who is scrolling through his phone with one hand, keeping the other one on your arm.

“Mornin’, sleepy head,” he chuckles softly when he sees you awake.

“Mmm, what time is it?” you ask letting your head rest on his chest a little longer.

“Quarter to nine. You can sleep a little more if you want, it’s not that late.”

“No, I promised mum I’d help her wrap gifts,” you sigh rolling over to your stomach as you push yourself up to your elbows to look at him. “Love the double chin you got going there,” you tease him sleepily and he just smirks.

“Yea? Quite cute, right? Worked a lot on it,” he jokes running his finger over it before letting out a chuckle. “Ready for our battle today?”

“As ready as I’ll ever be. You are going down this year, Styles,” you tell him pushing yourself up into a sitting position. Harry only pushes himself further on the bed enough to rest his head against the headboard.

“Oh really? I wouldn’t be that sure about tha’,” he warns you, but you are feeling pretty confident about your performance this year. There’s no way he can top it.

“We’ll see. Alright, I need a coffee. Want something for breakfast?” you ask him crawling out of the bed.

“Yeah, that would be nice.”

Your mum is already in the kitchen, sipping on her morning coffee while reading the paper. She doesn’t find it even a bit weird that Harry spent the night at yours, it’s been quite the usual for you. Harry helps you make eggs and bacon and the three of you eat together, having a lovely time and you genuinely feel like it’s just like in the good old times when you were still living home and Harry wasn’t Harry Styles, but the boy from across the street.

He goes home after breakfast to help his own mum with the cooking for tonight’s dinner and you don’t do much for the rest of the day, just spend time with your mum, watch movies and relax. It’s nice to unwind after such a busy year behind you.

Not long before five you go to take a shower and get ready to head over to the Styles’ and you pack everything you’ll need for the evening: gifts, ugly sweater, accessories. Harry is going down this year for sure.

It’s a little past six when you and your mum walk across the street, Anne’s Christmas lights are putting the little town house into the spirit for sure. You don’t even ring the bell, just walk straight in, like you always do. The Christmas tree stands tall in their living room and the table is already nicely set. Gemma and Michal are snuggled up on the couch while Harry is helping Anne in the kitchen with the finishing touches.

“I’m rooting for you this year,” Gemma winks at you when you set down your bag in the corner that has everything you’ll need for your performance.

“He’s gonna lose this round,” you smirk proudly, very sure in yourself.

Harry greets you with a bright smile and a tight hug when he walks into the living room, as if you didn’t just see each other a few hours earlier.

When the food is ready you all sit down to eat, and though you’re trying your best to focus on the conversation, you’re getting excited about tonight’s karaoke battle.

“Anxious much?” Harry asks you quietly.

“Why are you asking?”

He doesn’t answer, just places a hand to your thigh stopping it from shaking, making you realize you’ve been probably bouncing it all along. He smirks at you as you just roll your eyes at him.

“’S okay, you can handle one more year of losing,” he teases you and you give him an arched eyebrow.

“Don’t be so full of yourself, Harry,” you warn him, but he just squeezes your thigh again before bringing his hands back up to the table, leaving you a little breathless with his touch.

You all help clean up the table after dinner and when it’s done, you gather in the living room to open gifts.

When Harry’s career launched, the first few years you felt anxious about gifting him, because you felt like you couldn’t give him enough. He had all the money and bought everything he needed for himself, there wasn’t much you could give him. But when one time, you admitted to him this struggle of yours he assured you that it doesn’t matter what you give him, it’ll always be precious to him.

“You thought about me, you took the time to buy something for me, and that’s more than enough, Y/N,” he told you and though it took you time, but you got used to it. Especially when you saw the same excitement in his eyes every time you gifted something to him, you slowly but surely realized he wasn’t expecting a Gucci suit, but a thoughtful gesture.

Gathering in the living room you open the presents one by one and just as always, everyone was quite creative with the gifts. You can’t help but still feel a little anxious when Harry grabs his gift from you. Giving you an excited look he unties the little bow on the top and tears the wrapping paper off.

“Y/N!” he breathes out, eyes softening as he pulls the knitted cardigan out of the box.

“I always saw you wearing all sorts of cardigans and so I finally had a reason to learn how to knit, so I thought I would make one for you,” you ramble as he holds up the baby blue cardigan that has little daisies all over the front. It took you an entire week to just make the daisies, you worked on the whole cardigan for more than two months, usually in the middle of the night, staying up until unholy hours to finish in time.

But Harry’s smile is worth it all, he is beaming, clearly so in love with what you made him, so you breathe out relieved. He then puts it aside and wraps his arms around you pulling you into the tightest hug.

“Thank you, I love it so much,” he mumbles and kisses your temple and you breathe in his sweet scent, burying yourself in his embrace, hugging his waist.

When you part, Harry reaches for a box from under the tree and hands it to you, a nervous smile tugging on his lips. You can tell he wrapped the gift himself, the silver wrapping paper is a little uneven, but the huge rainbow colored bow on the top is the perfect touch that makes it like a piece of him.

You carefully tear the paper off, peeking inside you just see a plain box that doesn’t give much away. Glancing up at Harry you see how he is anxiously biting his bottom lip, even though you’d be happy with a gift as small as a candle. It’s the thought that counts.

“I-I wasn’t sure if this was the one you mentioned to me, so I hope it’s gonna be alright,” he mumbles, eyes fixed on your hands as they open the box, while you try to think back what you have told him about that caught his attention, but you just can’t recall what you wanted to get so badly you told Harry about it.

As you open the box you don’t process what it is immediately, the plastic wrapper making it hard to figure it out, but when you carefully pull out the object, you gasp in surprise.

“Harry!” you breathe out as you pull off the plastic of the old, vintage polaroid camera. It’s not one of these new types you can buy in stores easily, this is a classic, must have quite a history behind it.

Now you vaguely remember talking about longing for an oldschool, vintage camera, but it was months ago and you’ve forgotten about the whole thing since these devices cost a fortune because there aren’t many left from them. But now there’s one in your hands, because Harry not only listened to you, but he remembered and went out of his way to find you one in amazing condition.

“This must have cost a fortune!” you huff, your heart pounding in your chest, though you already know it doesn’t matter to him.

“This face is worth every penny,” he smiles at you softly before you throw yourself at him for another round of hugging. This man surely knows how to have you wrapped around his fingers.

The two of you sit on the floor as you figure out how to make the camera work, Harry bought everything needed, so you have a few packs of films as well. When it’s all done you bring it up to your face and aim it at Harry. It takes him a moment to realize that you’re about to snap your first photo and he tries to snatch the camera away, but it’s too late, the flash goes off and the device pushes out the undeveloped picture.

“You wasted your first snap on me?” he protests rubbing his eyes after the flash blinded him for a little.

“It’s not a waste,” you tell him as you patiently wait for the picture to finally appear.

Slowly, the colors start to show and in a couple of minutes Harry’s face appears, his hand reaching in the direction of the camera, looking out of focus, only his face appearing clearly. He looks so delicate, his eyes dazzling as a soft smile plays on his lips. This moment now will live forever not just in your mind, but on this photo.

 Harry goes out with his karaoke performance this year for sure and you’d be actually anxious about him winning if only you didn’t have the absolutely best performance right in your pocket.

His sweater this year features some really ugly looking penguins and a horroristic reindeer on the back, it’s really ugly and you can’t even imagine who thought it would be fine to make it and then sell it. His choice of music is also excellent, he has a great eye for songs you’d never imagine him perform and then shock everyone with it. This year, he chose Rude Boy by none other than Rihanna, and it’s fantastic, no one can make it through the song without crying. Harry makes sure to put on his best show, even dancing and twerking unapologetically, trying everything to win the battle and you are amazed by his effort. Above all the fun and jokes, he nails the song, that’s undeniable. It always baffles you how he can just slay any and all genres, even the ones that stand a million miles away from his style.

When the song is over, you all cheer for him, because he truly deserves it. He grins down at you in victory, but you just give him a challenging smirk.

“You can just give up now, if you want,” he teases you as you stand up from the couch and the two of you trade places.

“Oh, I think you should be the one to worry about losing,” you warn him grabbing your bag. Stepping to Gemma you whisper into her ear, instructing her to put on your song when you call out from the bathroom, since you are planning on do a grandiose entrance. When she hears what song you’ll be singing she gasps.

“Oh my fucking God, no way!” he looks at your with wide eyes.

“What? What is it?” Harry asks, dying to know what you just told his sister, but you shake your head at him.

“Patience,” you tell him before locking yourself up in the bathroom.

This year, you didn’t find the sweater, the sweater found you. On one of your thrift tours, you were digging up a huge pile of clothes when you came right across it and you knew what you needed to do.

Putting on the sweater you fix up your hair quickly before putting on your party glasses, the one that lights up if you switch it on. You take one last look at yourself in the mirror and smirk at your reflection knowing well you’ll have everyone dead when you walk out.

“Gemma! You can start it!” you call out with your hand on the doorknob, waiting to hear the music. Gemma quickly starts in and you haven’t even stepped out, you can hear a round of gasps.

Best Song Ever blasts through the speakers and you walk out trying your best to imitate a younger version of Harry, wearing the absolute ugliest Christmas sweater ever, that has the faces of One Direction all over it, filling up every inch of the fabric, and all of them have poorly photoshopped Santa hats on, it’s just literal trash and ridiculously perfect for the battle.

You grab the mic and start singing as everyone screams in the room. You jump, sing and even do the dance moves the boys do in the original music video, and when you look at Harry you see him staring at you in disbelief and total defeat. Everyone knows you won, nothing can top this performance ever and you could burst from the sweet feeling of victory.

By the end of the song everyone is up on their feet dancing and singing with you, a mini party forming in the middle of the living room and you all scream the last lines as the song comes to its end.

“I think we don’t even need to vote this time,” you say when the music stops, everyone screaming in agreement while Harry stares down at you, trying to hide his growing smirk.

“Where did you even find this?” he asks chuckling as he takes a better look at the sweater.

“At a thrift store, it called out my name, knew it’d be perfect.”

“It really is ugly, if I’m being honest,” he sighs, his eyes meeting yours again. “And the song… I accept defeat, you earned this victory, Y/N,” he tells you bowing and admitting your victory.

 Later that night everyone is so keen on watching Holiday, you agree to stay even though you feel your eyelids heavily weighing down, threatening to close with each passing moment. You let your head rest on Harry’s shoulder and he presses his cheek against the crown of your head.

It’s not a surprise you fall asleep halfway into the movie, but what you weren’t expecting is to wake up and find yourself not on the couch anymore, but in Harry’s bed. It’s dark, only the moon is shining through his windows and as you turn to the right you see that he is sleeping peacefully next to you on his back, one arm spread next to him, hand hanging from the edge, the other one resting on his stomach, rising and falling in a slow rhythm.

Squinting your eyes you look at the digital clock on his dresser, it reads 3:23 am so you’ve been asleep for quite a few hours now. You don’t even remember him bringing you up here, but you’re definitely not mad that he didn’t bring you home, just up to his room.

Rolling to your side you give yourself a moment to adorn his beauty without fearing he would catch your wandering eyes. Everything seems so perfect about him, the line of his nose, his cupid’s bow that delicately rolls into her lips. The crease between his eyebrows, his soft skin on his cheeks, down his neck that runs into his broad shoulders and inked, strong arms. You truly think there’s no man that could compare to him and you are lucky enough to live your life so close to him, be able to touch him, hear his voice whenever you miss him, see his smile and share a connection with him.

It’s so silly, but you think of him as your personal ray of sunshine in your life. Just the smallest things about him can brighten your worst day, he’ll always have a special place in your heart, no matter where life takes the two of you.

Watching him sleeping you allow yourself to break free from your doubts and fears and scooting closer you shyly curl up to his side, your head resting on his shoulder, but you can’t even make yourself comfortable before you feel him moving under you.

Sucking on your breath you think he’ll push you away, not wanting you so close, but instead, he pulls his arm from under you, curling around your frame as he pulls you tight to him, almost making you lie on top of him. Your whole body is pressed against him and you mingle a leg between his long ones under the soft sheets. You let out a long huff at the warm touch of his body against your skin, completely lost in him.

“You alright?” he mumbles in his sleep laced voice, his eyes remain closed.

“Yeah. Is this okay?” you nervously ask as you lay your hand flat on his stomach. He brings his hand that was hanging from the bed on his other side and covers yours, as he squeezes you tight to his side.

“’M all yours,” he breathes out, his words sending a shiver down your spine. You’re sure he didn’t mean it like that, but it warmed your heart to hear it from him and you let your mind play with the thought that there was more behind his words than a friendly manner.

Nuzzling your head into his chest you close your eyes and listening to his steady heartbeat you let yourself fall back asleep.

 Your morning is filled with coffee, pancakes, laughter and great company. Harry doesn’t let you leave without having breakfast with them, so you sit with the Styles family and laugh about the craziest stories from your teenage years.

“Remember when we tried to run away?” Harry grins at you, his red mug that had white polka dots all over it in his hands as he eyes you.

“Oh, how could I forget that?” you huff and Gemma turns to you with surprise in her eyes.

“Wait, I didn’t know about that!”

“Because we didn’t get too far,” Harry laughs. “We were, what, like fifteen?”

“Yeah, it was a few weeks after my fifteenth birthday,” you nod smiling.

“I had a fight with mum about God knows what, then stormed over to Y/N’s and talked her into running away. So we packed our backpacks and left.”

“Where did you go?” Michal asks with an amused grin as he listens to the story.

“We didn’t want to go into town, running into anyone we know, so we thought we would just go straight out to the meadow that’s there,” Harry says gesturing towards the window. The edge of the town is not so war, and a huge meadow lies there, a little stream running across it. “We walked for quite long, but then it started to get dark and we had nowhere to go, so we just ended up coming back home. No one even noticed we were gone, they thought we just went out to bike or something,” he finishes laughing.

“You knew about this?” Gemma asks Anne.

“Yeah, he came clear the next day, thinking he would piss me off with it, but I didn’t care, he came back for dinner, so it was alright,” Anne explains laughing.

It’s been so long since it happened, but I still remember it vividly, only that it was a more dramatic memory back then, now I can only laugh at it.

“We should go for a walk today,” Harry prompts to you.

“Wanna run away again?” you tease him.

“Always,” he chuckles.

You help cleaning up and agree with Harry to meet outside in an hour to take a walk to the meadow. Going home you take a shower and wash the dishes your mum left in the sink when she left for her morning shift. You put on a pair of boyfriend jeans, a warm sweater and your jacket with your trusty boots and you walk out the house right when Harry steps out as well. He grins in your way as the two of you meet in the middle of the street. He holds his arm out for you.

“M’ lady?” he smirks as you link your arm with his and the two of you head out for your little walk. It’s a gloomy day, might rain later as well, but it’s dry so far, so you’re just hoping to get home before it starts raining. Your runaway attempt wasn’t the only time the two of you came out here, it was kind of your place when you felt like having a break from everyone else. You biked out here, brought your favorite snacks and just ran around, enjoying the stillness.

However it also holds a bitter memory as well.

A little further down among the trees happened Harry’s first kiss and you witnessed it, feeling your heart break to a million pieces when you saw him lock lips with someone who wasn’t you.

Debby Hamilton was a friend of yours in sixth grade, you’d say, your only friend beside Harry and the three of you often hung out together around that time. Debby was a delight, you always desired to be more like her, boys liked her and she knew it damn well, but it didn’t make her cocky and egoistic. You always thought Harry had a crush on her, why would have he? They kind of looked cute together.

It was a Friday afternoon and Harry asked if you wanted to come out and listen to his new cassette he got for his old Walkman he refused to get rid of as technology was evolving. You figured he’d want Debby there as well so you invited her along, but didn’t tell Harry. He never made a move on Debby and you thought he was just looking for the right time.

That afternoon, you were supposed to meet them out there at five, but you didn’t leave until half past five and it takes about twenty minutes to get out there. Though you gave them the alone time technically, it still startled you when you found them under one of the oak trees, Debby leaning her back against the tree as Harry stood in front of her. She was smiling up at him sweetly, saying something to him and you were just about to call out for them and apologize for being late when Harry ducked his head and kissed Debby right in front of your eyes.

That was your first and probably worst heartbreak and you were only twelve. You felt betrayed, hopeless and na��ve to think Harry would ever have a thing for you when there were girls like Debby. You left without letting them know you were there. When Harry asked you later why you didn’t come you told him you felt sick to your stomach, which wasn’t a total lie, you had quite the nausea after seeing Harry with Debby, but he didn’t have to know all the details.

He later told you about kissing Debby and you pretended like you didn’t know about it. However they never dated and not long after their kiss Debby drifted away from the two of you. Not that you minded, you had a bitter feeling every time you had to look at her after that, jealousy raging in your chest knowing that she got Harry’s first kiss.

He didn’t bring it up after and you weren’t keen on talking about it, but you still know which tree they were standing under and now as you near the area you see that it still stands tall near the tiny stream.

Peeking up at Harry you see that his eyes are focused on the same tree, but then he catches you looking.

“Memories?” you innocently ask, feeling your chest tightening. You don’t even know why you asked. It’s been over a decade since that kiss, you are both adults, but you still can’t help the sadness that washes over you at just the thought, why would you want to get him talk about it now?

“’S just… that’s the tree I kissed Debby when I was twelve,” he mumbles with a shrug. Biting into your bottom lip you look at the old oak tree nodding your head and before you could stop yourself, you speak up.

“I know.”

“What? How would you? I never told you,” Harry asks stopping, a puzzled look pulling on his face.

“Well I… It doesn’t matter,” you sigh, regretting ever opening your mouth.

“It does. Tell me!” he pleads standing in front of you.

“I know it, because… I was here.”

“You what?”

“I came, I was just very late. And when I arrived you two were standing there and I saw you kiss. I thought I shouldn’t interrupt whatever was happening so I went home and let you two be,” you explain, changing it up a little bit.

“Why didn’t you tell me?”

“Why is it important that I saw it? It doesn’t change anything, right?” you ask with a smile that you intended to look innocent, but deep down it’s filled with pain.

Harry opens his mouth as if he wants to say something, but then remains silent and you are done talking about it, so you just quietly keep walking, Harry catching up with you a few moments later.

It’s awfully quiet after your revelation, it seems like Harry is deep in his thoughts and though you’re dying to know what’s occupying his bright thoughts, you’re kind of afraid you’d hear something you didn’t want to.

The two of you soon head back home and slowly, but you forget about the whole Debby thing. Harry starts talking again, but he looks a little keyed up still when you reach your street.

“Wanna come over later?” you ask standing on the pavement in front of your house, it’s just an innocent question. Harry nods his head.

“Sure. Is your mum working?” he asks glancing at the house, though he knows she is, the car is not on the driveway.

“Yeah. She’ll be home around six.”

He nods again and you want to ask if he is alright, but you decide not to. You share a quick hug before he heads over to his home and you do the same. The house waits for you in silence and when the door clicks behind you, it weighs down on you heavier than you were expecting. You hang your jacket, kick your boots off and throw yourself to the couch, covering your eyes with your arm as you huff out in frustration. You feel silly for getting upset about such a small thing even after so much time, but you just can’t help it.

You barely realize the sound of the front door opening, taking your arm off your eyes you see Harry walk in, eyebrows furrowed, a worried look on his handsome face.

“Harry—“ “I was waiting for you that day,” he simply says as you sit up with wide eyes, confused about what he is really talking about.

“What?”

“That day, we agreed to meet out there to listen to my new Stevie Wonder cassette, but you didn’t show up, Debby did even though I didn’t invite her out there.”

“Well, I did, thought you wanted her there too,” you explain, startled by the situation.

“I would have invited her if I wanted her to be there, but I wanted to be with you. Only you.”

“I-I’m sorry?” you breathe out, not seeing where he is going with it.

“Y/N, you don’t understand,” he huffs and he is right. You don’t. “I wanted to meet you, but you never came, or at least I thought. Then Debby showed up, I was frustrated that you weren’t there and she was being all nice, telling me how cute I looked when I was worried and it all just happened so fast and… I didn’t even want to kiss her.” He looks properly upset telling you the story and he takes a deep breath before his eyes meet yours with a hard stare. “I wanted to be with you,” he repeats.

“Harry, I’m sorry, I didn’t—“

He shakes his hair, not even letting you finish, because he knows what you wanted to say and that you still don’t understand the meaning behind his words.

“Y/N, I wanted to kiss you,” he then finally says and you suck on your breath as he continues. “Well, not right then and there, but I’ve been meaning to kiss you, I just didn’t know when. I thought that if we have a moment that afternoon I’d do it, but you never came and I was mad and disappointed. I hated myself for kissing Debby, because I didn’t really want to, it just… happened. I wanted to tell you, and I intended to do it when I told you we kissed, but you acted so happy, I figured you didn’t feel the same way about me as I did for you. So I didn’t tell you the rest, but…” He sighs in defeat, looking for words, but he ran out.

“Why are you telling this to me now?” you ask a little out of breath, your head feeling heavy at the new information you just heard.

“Why didn’t you tell me you saw us and why did you go home without a word?” he asks ignoring your question.

“I… don’t—“

“Don’t try to lie.”

Gulping hard you lick your dried lips as you stare back at him.

“Because I was… jealous.” Your voice comes out only as a whisper. Harry’s lips part as he takes two steps closer to you.

“You had feelings for me?” he asks and you just nod your head, not trusting yourself with your voice. “Do you still have feelings for me?”

“I do,” you whisper your answer and Harry lets out a sharp breath as he leaps across the room in your way. You jump to your feet, thinking that he’ll lash out on your for keeping it a secret and you open your mouth to explain yourself, but you never get to speak up because as Harry reaches you, one hand snaps to the back of your neck, the other one to your waist, yanking you against him as his lips crash to yours.

You gasp in surprise, but it doesn’t take long to kiss him back, your numb mind blindly reacting to his sudden action. Your hands snake up to the back of his neck as you pull him closer, returning his hungry kisses. His soft lips feel so smooth and warm against yours and when his tongue runs along your bottom lip you whimper letting your tongues meet in the middle.

He is intoxicating and it doesn’t help that your adrenaline level is up in the sky, you’ve fantasized about it way too many times, and now that it’s happening your body is burning in flames. He kisses you all over and over again, his body pressing against yours hard and when he even leans in making you lean back, you lose balance and the two of you fall to the couch, both of you gasping as you are forced to part your lips.

“Fuck,” you chuckle as Harry is basically lying on you, holding himself up on his arms, but you feel him everywhere.

“’M sorry, I got a little carried away, but I’ve been dying to do this since forever,” he admits chuckling as he lifts his head and looks down at you with those bright green eyes of his.

“Really?” you breathe out, only slowly processing what’s really just happened.

“Y/N, I’ve been in love with you since I first saw you hiding behind your mum.”

“Idiot, you were just a kid, you weren’t in love,” you chuckle, running up your hands to the back of his neck, your fingers playing with the soft curls. He smirks and nuzzles his nose against yours.

“Oh, I was, I just didn’t know it yet.” Leaning down he pecks your lips softly. “I’ve been meaning to tell you so many times, but I didn’t want it to ruin our friendship. Though I was growing impatient these last few years.”

“Yeah?” you chuckle.

“You can’t imagine,” he huffs shaking his head. I almost kissed you the other day in the kitchen, but Gemma completely ruined the moment.”

“I’m sorry I ran away, I was just—“ “No need to apologize. I guess it all played out well after all, right?” he smirks and you can’t help but chuckle.

“I guess,” you breathe out and the smile slowly fades from your lips. “And now what?” you ask quietly, staring up at him.

“Now… We’ll try to make things work. Test the waters. I’m very serious about this, Y/N,” he tells you. “I’ve been waiting for this my whole life so I’m not gonna let go of you now.”

“You have no idea how happy this is making me,” you choke out feeling the tears forming in your eyes.

“Oh Love, please don’t cry,” he begs and leaning down he kisses your tears away. “I’m right here, with you. Sorry it took me so long you get here, but I’m here now.”

“I know,” you huff blinking away the tears as you pull him down and press your lips to his. “I love you, Harry,” you whisper against his perfect lips. You feel him exhale sharply as he keeps kissing you before he lifts his head so your eyes meet again.

“I’ve always loved you.”

 Thank you for reading, let me know what you thought about it!

[hp-imagines-07]

Act Like a Gryffindor

Fred Weasley x Fem!Gryffindor!Reader

Universe: Harry Potter; The Golden Trio era

Type: really fluff and kinda funny

Summary: the 4 times that Fred Weasley made you blush and the one time that it was the other way around... 

Request: YES|no - "Yay!! Could you write something about a super shy easily embarrassed reader who has the biggest crush on Fred? He teases her all the time and the others are like ‘oh leave her alone’ then she says something back and he goes BRIGHT RED. Sorry if that’s too much!!" @bnha-sero-hanta | "Can I request something with Fred Weasley x reader?" @coffee-wihtout-caffeine

Prompt: xxx

Warnings: cursing maybe and flirting

Song: xxx

Words Count: 3.3K

Posted: 30th of June 2020

A/N: this request is just perfect, i'm sorry | it's kinda of a 4+1 and i hope it got as good as i think it is

My Others Accounts: @imagines-07​ (Principal Account) | @obx-imagines-07 (Outer Banks) | @cm-imagines-07​ (Criminal Minds) | @stit-imagines-07 (Stranger Things & IT) | @mcu-imagines-07 (Marvel Comics Universe)

MY MASTERLIST

"Hey, [y/n]. Ready for the practice?" You heard a known voice coming from behind you and you turned around, seeing George walking to the pitch and also to you.

"Always, George. I'm always ready for quidditch." You said and started to walk beside him, as both of you were going to the same destination anyway. "Do you know where Fred is? I didn't saw him the whole day." You asked and looked at your left, seeing George smirking at you and anyone could know why he was looking like this just after you said something about Fred, what made you roll your eyes at the redhead one.

"Well, I don't know either. Just saw him at the classes that we have together, but he wasn't even having lunch at the Great Hall." He said while you two walked into the pitch, holding your brooms and with a thinking expression.

You signed and looked at him with a face that screams 'aRE YOU FUCKING STUPID?'. "And you don't think that it's weird or get worried?"

George just shook his head and went to his position, so the practice could start. As you all started to train, Fred appeared from nowhere and started to play but looked like anyone noticed that he was missing until he got there late.

The train was really intense and tiring, ok you were almost dying at the end of it. But you noticed that Fred was kinda off the whole hour, well he almost fell off his broom so many times that you stopped counting when it got to 6... All of the players got to the floor and you could see everyone literally sweating and breathing heavily kinda gross but whatever. You were going to the vesting room to take a good bath and smell good again, but you were stopped by a hand holding your wrist.

"Hey, princess." Fred's voice got to your ears before you could even turn around to see him and your cheeks started becoming warmer and redder. As your eyes found his, you could notice all of your friends around you two by your panoramic vision. "Were you worried about me?" The redheaded one asked and while you rolled your eyes and took your wrist out of his hand against what you actually wanted to do, everyone around you let out a few gross noises. They were all tired about Fred making fun of you. "Or you just missed me?"

"Oh, c'mon, Fred!"

"Could you not say anything for once?"

"You never shut up?"

"Let the girl be!"

Your friends said at the same time and you understood just a few of them. But you were too embarrassed to trust on your voice and be sure that you wouldn't stutter - and give him the satisfaction, never - so you just blushed harder and went to the vesting room again.

You just wanted to stab yourself with a big knife by being so shy, you thought about the perfect answer if you had said 'in your dreams, Weasley...' he would stop to joke about your feelings towards him.

"I should act like a Gryffindor..."

-

You slowly opened your eyes and blinked a few times, so your vision would get used to all the sunshine that was passing through the big window next to your bed, that was with the curtains open.

As you started to see things and not just black points, you were able to see Hermione looking at you. "Good morning, sleepyhead." She said and you noticed her coming closer to your bed, while your hand scratched your eyes.

"What time is it?" Your voice was deep and raspy, but even if you didn't notice it, for anyone around, looked like you were dying or that you were just drunk.

It's time for breakfast, let's go." Granger answered you and pulled the covers out of your warm body, that got in contact with the cold air from Hogwarts and you felt a little shiver passing through your spine. "What time you went to sleep last night?" She asked you, just by seeing the way that your eyes refused to open and get used to the room natural clarity.

"I don't know..." You groaned while sitting up and looking around, finding an empty dorm with just you and Hermione. Yeah, that was really late already.

"Go change, so we can have breakfast." Hermione said and helped you to get out of your bed by pulling you up with her hands at yours. You grabbed a change of clothes and went to take a fast shower so you two wouldn't miss breakfast - even if you didn't know the exact time...

While you were taking a hot bath and changing into more presentable clothes, Hermione was organizing your side of the dorm, like your bed and your other outfits at your wardrobe. This girl couldn't see a mess that she was already organizing it.

You were so focused on the amazing feeling 'after-bath' that you didn't notice footsteps at the stairs coming closer and closer to your dorm. As you got out of the bathroom, already ready to go to the Great Hall and finally eat anything, your dorm's door opened and Ron's head slowly appeared, probably being afraid that any of you two were changing or naked. When he saw that it was safe to give a proper look around your dorm, the door totally opened and you saw 3 redheads.

"What are taking you guys so much?" Ron asked and looked like just George noticed that you just got out of the bath.

"Was it hard to awake her again?" George looked at Hermione and everyone seemed to forget Ron's question, looking at you. Your eyes were too heavy to be totally open, your hair was a total mess, your shirt upside down... "Wow, it looks like you're dying." He said and everyone giggled, except for you that was too sleepy to understand anything that was happening around you.

But Fred knew that it was the perfect moment to make you flustered. "Want me to carry you to the Great Hall, princess?".

You were too sleepy to laugh, but not even now your knees stopped to become weak with his beautiful smirk, neither did your cheeks stopped to become warmer and redder. Stupid body...

Your brain was so focused to try to act normal and continue sleepy, that you didn't notice George slapping the back his twin's head and whispering something related to 'shut up', or Ron saying "Why you always have to do this with her?", or Hermione going to you while giving Fred a mortal glare and grabbing your shoulders, guiding you out of your dorm.

You were feeling so embarrassed with the way that just his smile could make your knees become jelly, your stomach becomes full with butterflies and your cheeks turn redder then Fred's hair...

"Why I can't act like a Gryffindor?"

-

Your books felt too heavy to be held by just one of your arms, but you couldn't stop to read your cards for the DADA's test that would happen at the next day. Even if you felt your arm shake and your shoulder starting to ache, you were desperate to know everything about all those spells.

Your hand was trying to learn the perfect moves so the spell would work totally, and you were so focused that didn't notice someone calling from you. You just saw that somebody was actually talking to you when the red-headed one tokes most of your books out of your arm and you jumped slightly by the first action noticed. As your eyes fell on Fred's face, you felt your body finally relax and gave up to the relieving feeling of the heavy books at somebody else's arms.

"Bloody hell, [y/n]!" The Weasley said at the same moment that he noticed how the books that you were taking were heavy for two arms, imagine for just one...

"Sorry, Freddie." You whispered and he looked at you, paying more attention to what you were going to say. "But I have Transfiguration now, I can't hang out." You finished and started to walk faster, forgetting about the books he was carrying for you. Fred just rolled his eyes with the way that you were so concentrated and focused on learning all those spells that you forgot that you were talking with your last Transfiguration partner.

"Well, we are in the same class." He said and you took your gaze out of the papers and looked at him, as you finally noticed with who you were talking to, your eyes widened a bit and you gave him a tired smile.

"Sorry, again. I'm just nervous about the DADA's test next week..." You said and looked at the floor embarrassed with your actions. But Fred just gave you a reassuring smile and you knew that he understood you - well, he's friends with Hermione Granger -, what made your tense shoulders tranquillize and you two walk side to side to your next class.

As you got to the class, you sat at your respective tables and waited for McGonagall, while the rest of the students was appearing and sitting...

After a while, the professor started to teach a new spell for the class something related to 'Daro' or 'Dure', that you weren't being able to focus at all, you weren't at a moment that you were could learn a new spell with all the other ones from DADA that you had to know for the test. And, of course, McGonagall noticed that you weren't paying attention to her, so you needed the help from someone that you would stop and hear.

"Mr Weasley." She said and both of the twins looked at her with confused faces, because this was a unique time that they didn't do anything. "Could you help Mrs. [y/l/n] with the new spell?" Minerva asked and you turned around to see the twins looking at each other and furrowing their eyebrows. "George one is more helpful."

Fred just rolled his eyes because the statement of the professor and George laughed at his angry expression, coming to sit next to you and noticing all of your books. "DADA's test?" He asked and you nodded, while your mouth opened in a yawn. You didn't even sleep 5 hours last night, you were so worried about all the spells that you couldn't stop studying. "Let me see you trying." George said and you knew that he was talking about this new spell from Transfiguration. Your shook your wand in a way that you thought that was the right way, said the spell and looked at the vase with flowers that McGonagall gave one to all of you. But nothing happened. "Well, the thing is tha-"

"I think [y/n] prefers my help, professor." Fred made everyone look at him, that winked at you. Everyone just groaned at him - even McGonagall ignored him -, they were all sick of all of his flirt comments, just to make you blush, and now wasn't different. Your breath stopped at your throat and with wide eyes and a dry mouth, your cheeks started to become warmer and you knew that you blushing.

Both of your hands went to cover you red and embarrassed face and George gave you an embarrassed smile. "I'm sorry about him, [y/n/n]. He never stops..."

'I want to act like a Gryffindor, but I can't'

-

The snow was falling on this cold as fuck day. Not even the two coats you were wearing, were being able to stop the freezing air to make goosebumps go all around your body or to make your body became warm at anyway. And to make everything worse, Hogsmeade is not a cosy place to pass a normal day, but today was way worse. Your friends wanted to go to the Honeydunkes and buy anything that could make one of them forget about her recent 'heartbreak' - she cheated him, you can't understand why the rest of your friends keep helping her by something that she did... - but you weren't in the mood of being inside of a crowded store.

So, while they were inside of the warm store, you were freezing outside, with your shoulders shaking, trying to warm yourself at any possible way. You saw the Weasleys, with the rest of their crew coming to the same store as you were outside, great. As they were coming closer, Hermione and Harry were the first ones to notice you and let all of them behind to see you. 

"Hey, [y/n]!" They said together and hugged you. Wow, they were so cosy and you were so cold - and hoping they didn't notice that you were freezing... The twins came behind of them and said their 'hi's to you, but Fred toke notice of the way that you were hugging yourself to stop the wind to hit you, the way that your hands were brushing against each other to create some kind of friction between them, the way that your teeth were hitting each other, the way that your lips were a mix of blue and purple, and the way that your shoulders were frenetically shaking.

He just takes one of the sweaters Molly did for him and offered to you. Everyone around looked at the two of you with confused faces, while Fred's eyes were locked with yours. "You're cold." He just said and you whispered a little thank you, putting his sweatshirt on. It smelled like him and was really big on you, well, Fred is kind of really tall, comparing to you and any of your and his friends. "It looks better on you anyway..." He whispered while looking at the floor and raising his eyebrows, as it was the most obvious thing in the entire world.

But, not even his whisper is delicate, so everyone ends listening to what he said and look at him with faces more confused than before. "Well, if you say so." The words got out of your mouth before anything could stop them, and your cheeks became warmer and redder than they were by wearing his cloth. All of his friends looked at you, with wide eyes and proud smiles, by you finally flirting back with Fred, but by the smile that grew up on his face, you knew that nothing good could come from it.

"And why would I lie to you, princess?" There it is. The comment that you were expecting but didn't want to come. Your knees felt weak, with the butterflies on your stomach, but one thing never changed, your cheeks blushing. Your whole body felt warmer, and you were sure that it wasn't because of the sweater.

"Shut up, Fred!"

"Stop being an asshole!"

"Leave her alone!"

You didn't even pay attention to the rest of them, you just turned around and got inside of the store as fast as your legs could take you. A full Honeydunkes felt more attractive than being embarrassed around Fred and all of his friends.

'He acts like a Gryffindor...'

- 

The sunset is beautiful at anyway, watching it from the TV, from the Astronomy Tower, from the big windows at the common room, at any dorm, but nothing compares to the way it looks at the Black Lake. When the sky becomes orange, purple, pink, yellow until it becomes dark and the stars shining... But all this show being reflected at the waters of the lake.

And you couldn't lose it today, just like you did the whole week. Every single day, you were doing something else that would make you busy until the sunset was totally over and the unique things shining in the sky, were the stars and the moon. It wasn't an ugly view or something, but it didn't have the same magic. It's even weird using the term 'magic' while being a student at Hogwarts and actually studying everything about real magic, but seeing something that not even professor Dumbledore could do or control, was kind of natural magic...

So, you finished your essay for Potions, that was just for next week (but if you let everything for the last day, you would have to be awake the whole night and wouldn't be as good as it is right now) and went to the Black Lake. At the way there, a few people from the same house as yours tried to stop you and chat, but you just gave various excuses to not talk to anyone, so you could get to your destination in time to see the perfect sunset.

As you got to the Black Lake, you saw the twins with a few of their friends talking more like shouting, but you just wanted to enjoy the view and relax a little bit after a really busy week, that's what the end of the Fridays are for...

You sat at the grass, putting your bag down beside you and pulling out a book, that Hermione gave to you about the history of magic and it was more interesting then you could have ever imagined, to have something to do until the sunset would start. With you back resting against a tree and crossed legs, you opened your book and tried to find where you had stopped to read.

After a few minutes of silence (or just a few waves of laughter from groups of friends that probably had all of their essays' pages in white and didn't even care about it), you noticed the way that the wind started to become colder and faster, all the distant voices were becoming harder and harder to hear and understand, and the natural light from the sun was different. 

Time for the show.

You put something at your book so you would know where you stopped to read at the next time you opened the book, put it at your bag again and just looked at the sky. It first started with a mix of yellow, pink and blue, and you never felt so peaceful. Until-

"Hey, princess." You rolled your eyes, already knowing who it was. Fred already put his arm around your shoulders, bringing you closer to him and, if you weren't so relaxed with the breathtaking view and mad that he just ruined the quiet place, you would've blushed... "Enjoying the view? Because I am." You didn't even have to turn your head or take your eyes out of the coloured sky to know that he was looking and talking about you. "C'mon, not even a little red for me?" Fred continued talking, trying to get your attention. And he didn't stop there. He started babbling about anything, to see if you would blush with any of the compliments, but what you really just wanted silence. And you knew pretty well that just asking for him to stay quiet or saying for him to shut up, he wouldn't stop talking. You had to stop him at someway, and you thought about various things to say or do. And then, just one of them felt right.

You turned your head to look at him, that smiled brightly seeing that he finally got the attention he wanted, but before you could stop yourself or he could think of anything else, your hands went to his face pulled him into yours. Fred finally stopped talking when your lips touched his.

He kissed you back at the same moment he noticed that one of the two of you finally did what he was fantasizing about since he first saw you in your fourth year. Your lips were just as soft as he had imagined, but they tasted like pumpkin juice (your favourite), with a little bit of strawberries (of your gloss). While his lips fitted just as perfectly with yours as they looked like they would, with a flavour of chocolate and mint toothpaste.

You slowly pulled apart from each other, but with your noses still touching, your breaths hitting each other's mouths and lips brushing against one another, while Fred opened the brightest smile you had ever seen, just like you, but with your bottom lip between your teeth.

"You wouldn't stop talking..." You just whispered and you even thought that he didn't hear what you said, but when his cheeks became redder than his own hair, you just giggled.

'I finally acted like a Gryffindor...'

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[ckbookish]

BATMAN BINGO MASTER POST 2020

1 "I thought you were dead.": I Still See Your Ghost 

Today was just not Dick's day. First he overslept his alarm and was late to work. Amy had been less than impressed at his tardiness... Then He had bungled what should have been an easy take town... But the straw that broke the camel's back was Tim. Dick had forgotten to call Tim. 

2 Friendly fire: Fratricide 

Jason was pissed. No, Jason was enraged. Yeah, he was enraged at the whole mess his family-- if that’s even what they were to each other anymore-- had gotten him in. It was meant to be a simple night. Break in. Torch the drugs. Maybe shoot a couple of people and go home. But no, Batman heard about his plans and decided that arson was too extreme. “Someone could get hurt.” Well someone had gotten hurt, a lot of someones. 

3 Hypothermia: Weekend Commute 

Dick Grayson makes his way home during the first snow fall of the year, when he finds himself confused and cold, miles from home.

Chapter two Bruce's perspective.

4 Superman: Bringer of the Dawn

The Aftermath of when the Joker shoots Dick.

or

Where do you go when your family tells you to get out?

5 Shot: The Gratitude Trap

Bruce finds himself in the dark, a place he never thought he would be when it came to Clark Kent and Dick Grayson. Yet here he is digging for answers, because he is too scared to pick up the phone and call. 

6 Two-face: The Better Choice 

How do you reconcile the man who was once your friend with the monster he has become? Bruce reflects on how the man he once called his best friend changed. How could the man who helped him foster Dick, hold that baseball bat? 

7 Drowning: Omori’s Law

Deep in the sewer's under Gotham, Batman is trapped. There is no back up, no Robin. He is faced with the single truth that he tried to teach each of his partners... You have to save yourself. 

  8 Found Family: A Restoration from a Resilient Heart

Dick just wants to not be alone with the shadows in the house. Bruce doesn't realize he has lived with them for far to long, and maybe he doesn't have to anymore.

9 Adoption: The Irrefutable Truth

When he reached the reception, he found himself looking around a fairly empty room. There were a few call girls in the corner filling out forms, an older woman holding a dog, a kid that looked about twelve and a middle aged man who looked like he was ready to cry. He knew no one. Dick was about to turn around and head back to his desk when the on duty officer called out to him. Officer O’Conner was one of his fellow rookies, he had a thick accent. Dick thought he might be from Louisiana. “Grayson! Why didn’t you say your brother was coming to see you?” Dick looked at him with his mouth slightly open. There was no way he heard that right. “My what?” 

10 Bruises: Mr. Wayne

Tim is new to this. He's only been Robin for a little over six months. It was going well. But now he was going to be fired. Batman wouldn't want a partner who got caught at school with a black eye. Would he?

11 Bruce is dead: You Have One Saved Message 

Gotham gossip columns spread lies and smear good people's names. But yet Damian can't help but think maybe this mornings article was true.  That despite all his claims of being the true son of Bruce Wayne, he was in fact the only unwanted one.

12 CPR: Vital Signs 

Robin wakes to find him and Batman in an exploded factory. With Batman injured and the building burning around them, Dick struggles to get them both to safety.   

13 Dad:  Storge 

Bruce could have sworn his spirit had left him momentarily.  The sudden hollowness that filled him couldn’t be explained in any other way. 

 “Your dad must have his hands full with you.”  Elizabeth Ribbons leaned forward and patted Dick’s shoulder, as he reached for yet another slice of cheesecake from a passing waiter’s tray.  

Bruce fixed his eyes on the ice sculpture that hid him from view.  It suddenly seemed like the most interesting design in the world.  The soft lines of the ice on the otherwise insignificant over sized swan seemed like a lead shield...  Because Dick would read it easily in his expression. He wanted to be Dick’s dad.  But he wasn’t. 

14 Stealing the Batmobile: T-Minus Six Hours

Some days Tim is sure that he’s gonna be killed. Usually it’s some luck shot or near miss that made his life flash before his eyes. Not today though. Today he was positive Bruce was going to kill him. Yes, today was the day that Timothy Jackson Drake was going to be put down. He’s not sure that even Nightwing could save him. He was going to go down in history as the first sidekick to be murdered by their mentor. Because the Batmobile was definitely not where he’d parked it.

15 Wayne Enterprises: Amidst the Absence of Meaning 

Bruce is worried. He's running on less than three hours of sleep, and way too many cups of coffee. He had messed up. That much was obvious. The question was would Dick forgive him?

A gruesome night on patrol bleeds into Bruce's work day and now all he can wonder is if this is the thing that will push Dick over the edge? Had he finally seen to much pain?

16 Ransom: Sum of My Worth

The ring of the phone seemed to echo through the manor’s still too quiet long, winding halls, and everyone present collectively held their breath. Bruce lunged for the phone.   

17 Secret Injury: Hiding in Pain Sight

“What?” Dick asked sharper than he meant to. He was tired.

“Nothing.” Tim said with a small smirk. “Heavy is the head.”

Dick closed his eyes, glad that Tim couldn’t see them. He was so sick of this. Tim, Jason, Damian and Cass all didn’t think he was good enough, well Cass hadn’t said that, but Dick could read her. They didn’t think he was up to the job. Well they didn’t need to tell him that. He knew it.

18 Superboy: An Interlude in Breathing 

Tim looked out over the water in a daze. Bruce and Dick had gone somewhere below deck and he was alone. Well there were strangers on the ship mingling and talking excitedly--but Tim gave them no notice. Instead he watched the water lap up against the hull and crash down back to meet the dark, cold waters. They were far enough out that he could no longer see the shore. It was just endless expenses of sea and sky. Something tickled his neck and he started, only to realize he had been crying. It was only a tear slipping under his collar.

The days after the battle of Infinite Crisis

19 Betrayed: Smother

She took another drag of the cigarette, letting the smoke roll in her lungs for a long moment before allowing it hiss out between her teeth. The screams from the warehouse weren’t completely muffled by the distance, or the walls. Perhaps she was only imagining them. But then, sounds like that, she didn’t think she could dream up. She jumped after a particularly high pitched yelp. “Get a grip.” She dropped the cigarette and pulled out another. Her hand shook as she lit it. “It’s just some random kid. He’s not--” She bit back a sob. She didn’t deserve to cry. She had no right to tears, not when it was her fault.   

20 Crowbar: Breaklights

The mail fell to the ground and the paper smacked the tiles hard.  The sound in reality couldn’t have been all that loud, but it seemed to echo around the entryway.  Bruce didn’t look at the dropped bills and the invitation to a fundraiser for the new Gotham women’s shelter.  He was too fixated on the small stamp with the queen of England's head on it.  Wolverhampton.  

The large envelope was far heavier then it should have been.  Bruce could feel bile crawling up his throat.  

He had forgotten.

21 Deathstroke: Debts and Dues

There were some things that were never pleasant, getting caught in the snow without socks, losing your keys, and not being able to remember the name of a song. Having a gun pointed at your chest, Dick felt, qualified as extremely unpleasant. He stood stock still. The barrel of the gun was still hot, it burned slightly as it dug into his sternum. Even with his uniform he could still feel the heat left over from previous rounds fired. He didn’t flinch. He couldn’t flinch. “Move.” “You know I can’t.” Dick wondered if Slade had the guts to do it.   

22 Mission Gone Wrong: Murmur in the Quiet Hours

Superman? Clark froze. He knew that voice. But-- he had never heard it sounding so sad. Was that-- no. Clark dove for his phone, still on the counter from when he got home last night. The screen was black. Dead. Clark swore and dropped it. He was in his coat and shoes before it hit the counter top.   

23 Kidnapped:  Chum 

Dick trumped through the leaves, stopping his feet roughly. He relished the sound of the crunch beneath his shoes as he tread on the brown, dead leaves before him. He felt rather justified in his satisfaction. After all the world had taken so much from him, why wouldn’t he do his best to crush it in return. The woods were cool and as he went deeper into them they grew darker. The sun had long set, and the sky was quickly vanishing as the trees grew thicker. Wayne Manor was far behind him. He was never going back. He hated those pristine walls, those old floor boards. He hated the quiet. He hated the stuffy furniture and the rules and the vases and pictures. He hated his new guardian and that… that… Dick couldn’t remember what Alfred was called, but he hated it. The bag on his back felt heavy. It had everything Dick owned in it. Well and a toothbrush that Alfred had given him. But he didn’t think that was really stealing. 

24 Riddler: Seeking Silence on Shortwaves

Normally Dick would be happy to listen to Tim talk. In fact, Dick thought it was one of his favorite sounds in the world. Tim rarely allowed himself to be excited about things. Hearing him speak so freely and openly to Bruce and him about his plans was refreshing. Dick only wished it wouldn’t be at the cost of his life.

Batman hadn't always been so strict about talking unnecessarily over comms. When it was just two of them it hadn't mattered, their walkie talkie system had always worked. But now that Nightwing and Robin were in Gotham, it seems insane that they never realized: if only one person can talk over the radio at a time... how could they call for help?

25 Mr. Freeze: Glimpsing the Sun While Trapped in the Rime

He almost called Bruce between his fourth and fifth class. He pulled his phone out, leaning against his locker, and half dialed his number when a warm hand fell on his shoulder. “Hey.” Dick spun around and blinked back black spots as his body protested the sudden movement. A blaze of red hair filled his vision and Dick felt a small fire build in his chest. His face split into a wide smile.

After a run in with Mr. Freeze Dick finds himself feeling odd at school, but he can't go home, not when Barbara's asked him to drive her to Betty's party after school.

[fieryghxul]

Margaritas, reunions and confessions. [a.h.]

                                    ✧｡:*•.───── ❁ ❁ ─────.•*:｡✧

Pairing: Aaron Hotchner x Reader

Fandom: Criminal Minds

Warning(s): fem!reader – dom!hotch (well i tried) – last season’s spoilers – drinking – cursing – smut –  unprotected sex (wrap it before you tap it tho) – oral sex (fem receiving) – slight chocking – a bit fluff at the end.

A/N: hello everyone! this is super random but i came up with this in the middle of the night and i couldn't shake the idea out of my head. i am not a writer and english is not my first language so if there’s any mistake, i apologize in advance. also, this is my first hotch smut so i hope it’s good. enjoy!

                                     ✧｡:*•.───── ❁ ❁ ─────.•*:｡✧

[March 14th, 2020. 8:30 pm.]

“I have to go but promise me that you’re going to stop thinking about work and that you’re going to have fun these days.” You heard the pleading voice of Penelope Garcia on the phone as you walked out of the bathroom.

“I promise. I love you and I’ll see you when I get back.” You smiled and you knew that she was smiling too.

“It’s a date, angel. Love you more.” And with that, the line went silent.

You put your cell phone aside and took a look at the open suitcases on the bed. You didn't have anything planned but you knew you have to go out to clear your head and relax, things at work have been very stressful lately so when Prentiss told the team about taking some vacation time, you didn't hesitate to get a ticket and get on the first plane you found.

And that's why you were currently in a hotel room in Santorini, Greece. Yes, it seems like a lot, but nothing you can't afford.

A few minutes later, you finished applying some mascara and lip gloss, and took a few steps back to stare at yourself in the mirror. The navy-blue self-tie slit dress hugged every curve of your body perfectly; you paired it with a pair of black heels and a black jacket, just in case it gets cold at night. After taking one last look and smiling slightly at the reflection, you turned to grab your bag and left the room, hoping to have a good night once you were out of the hotel.

                                                       ▪ ▪ ▪

People flooded the streets and it was understandable, the night was really beautiful, there was a light breeze and the full moon was perfectly reflected in the sea. You have been walking for almost 2 hours, taking photos of almost everything and enjoying the night until you came across a bar, the word "cocktail" in the name of the place definitely caught your attention so you didn't think twice before walking into the place.

You walked to the bar and waited for the bartender to come up to you. While you were waiting, you could feel the back of your neck burning, someone was watching you but you didn’t want to deal with anyone yet, so you just ignored it, concentrating on reading the menu even though you already knew what you were going to order.

“Good evening, ma'am. Are you ready to order?” You look up from the menu, a brunette in her 20s is at the other side of the bar was smiling at you.

“Uh, yes, a margarita would be fine.” You ordered, mirroring her smile, and the girl gave you a little nod before walking away.

In the meantime you took your phone out of your bag and opened the ‘bau ladies’ group chat to send one or two of the photos you took a few hours ago with a “next time, i’m bringing all of your cute asses with me.” below them.

JJ was the first to reply, “oh my god, it’s gorgeous!”

Followed by Emily’s “look at that and some of us are still doing paperwork :( get drunk on my behalf please.”

You chuckled under your breath at her text and the margarita arrives just in time, “i’m on it, boss ;) isn't it a little late to be doing paperwork?"

Penelope replies next, “paperwork hahaha what a weird way to spell tara’s name“ and two “PENELOPE!” appear automatically in chat.

“you two are so obvious and spencer owns me 20 now.” You hit the send button before graving the margarita, taking a few sips of it. It takes about 3 minutes for your phone to vibrate again and you were about to answered but you are interrupted by the bartender.

“From the man at that table, ma'am.” She says placing another margarita in front of you and discreetly pointing at one of the tables that were on the patio of the place, you turned around but the only thing you see from the bar is his back. “Don’t worry; it doesn’t have anything weird on it.”

“Thank you...” The bartender walks away again and you stare at the drink, debating for a moment about whether or not to go and face the mysterious man. Fuck it. You decided before putting you phone back in your bag, forgetting about the messages and graving that and the drink before making your way to the table.

“Uh,” you cleared your throat once you reached said table, "can I seat here or are you waiting for someone?"

“Please.” He murmur in a low voice while gesturing toward the empty chair, indicating that you can sit down and a strange feeling of familiarity floods your body at that gesture. You shock your head trying to ignore that before placing your bag aside and sitting down in front of the man.

“I just wanted to thank you for the—“

The words got stuck on your throat and the world seemed to have stopped when you finally laid your eyes on the suited man that you thought you'd never see again.

Holy shit.

You stood still, a part of you fearing that if you moved he might disappear. Your face probably showing clear signs of confusion and shock as Aaron Hotchner sit right there in front of you.

He still looked serious and intimidating, his gaze reimaging cold to those who didn't know him and you remember all of those times you teased him about being a robot, there were times when you actually managed to make him laugh.

Yet at the same time there was something different about him. There was a different glow around him, he seems more relaxed and you could see it in his expressions, even in his posture.

“Hello, Y/N.” Hotchner said, voice still low but strong enough to bring you back to the present.

“Hey.” You said, still processing the fact that he was here with you and in the most unexpected place. “I, uh, it’s been a long time.”

“Almost 3 years.” He said before taking a sip of the glass that rested on his hand, you assumed that it was scotch.

3 years in 6 months, 13 days, 1 hour and 65 seconds. Give it or take.

“Almost, yeah… so what are you doing here?” You asked, “I mean, you were more a city type of guy.”

“I still am, Y/N, but Jack and Jessica insisted on me going on a little vacation because apparently it’s been a while since I had some ‘me-time’.”

Your face light up a bit at the mention of the kid, Hotch noticed it. “How’s Jack? I can barely remember when the last time I saw him was was but he must be so big now.”

“He’s 14 and almost as tall as me.” A smile appeared on Hotch's face, he didn't used to smile a lot and you thought it was a bit normal considering the work that you two shared, but those times that he did you used to felt butterflies in your stomach. Still do apparently. “What about you? What are you doing here? I mean, you were more a city type of girl.”

You chuckled softly when you heard him repeating your words and you shrugged slightly, “I'm having some vacation time, it's rare to have free time at the BAU, you know? So when you do, you take it without thinking twice.”

“How’s the team doing?”

“Good. We're working on some things, going through a few changes, the usual I guess.” This time it was you who drank, taking a long sip of the margarita that was still in your hands.

“Do you want to talk about it?”

“Do you want to hear me talk about it?”

“Of course, unless, do you have somewhere else to be, Y/N?”

“Not anymore. We might need a few more of this though.” You pointed to the drinks on the table and flashing him a smile, catching a glimpse of his before calling the bartender and ordering another round of drinks.

And then you started talking, Hotch listening carefully to every word that came out of your mouth. You started with the cult that kidnapped Spencer and Garcia and then launching into the saga of the Everett Lynch a.k.a "The Chameleon", you mentioned how Emily is now shortlisted to be the next FBI director and how she would name JJ as the next unit chief of BAU unit, but that remains to be seen; you also talked about Garcia leaving the team to work in Silicon Valley and Hotch noticed the sad tone in your voice when you mentioned that but in part he was happy that everyone was moving forward with their lives, making new decisions and following different paths. You continued with Spencer being a consultant and teaching at the same time and finished with Rossi getting married again then talking about retirement but not fully doing it.

“That’s because Rossi’s never going to retired.” You and Hotch said in unison, laughing after noticing that.

“A lot of things had happened then.” He said, not very surprise and titling his head to one side, you nodded mutely. “But you forgot of someone, Y/N.”

“I did?”

“Yes, you. What about you? How are you?” He asked, his tone of voice changing to a concerned one.

“Oh… I, uh, I’m good.” You began but more hesitant this time, “I will never get used to the changes but its part of life so I just have to suck it up and live with it. I don’t have an outer motive yet so I'm not leaving the BAU, that's for sure. I always knew that that's where I belong and I can’t even bring myself to think about other options.”

“You have always been an important asset to the team, Y/N. The BAU is still lucky to have you.” Hotch said, still sounded like the boss but you didn’t comment anything out loud about it. Instead, you smiled kindly at him and both went silent after that, staring at each other every now and then and finishing the rest of your drinks. It was a comfortable and familiar silence, one of the many that you two used to share while working together in the office or in the long nights in the jet after finishing a case.

Your gaze swept over the bar, noticing the few people that was still there and the employees staring to clean up the place. You took at deep breath, pulling out your wallet.

“Well, Hotch, this was fun. Unexpected but fun.” You left some money under your empty cup, paying for your part of the drinks and Hotch did the same thing. “I should get going now, so—“

“Let me walk you over to your hotel.” He cut you off, grabbing his blazer from the chair and turning to look at you.

“Hotch you don’t ha—“

“Please, Y/N. I insist.” He said and his voice serious once again, just like when he used to get too bossy with the team but with a smile that contradicted that tone and you couldn’t say “no” to that.

“Alright, Sir. Let’s go.”

You grabbed your things and started walking out of the bar, Hotchner walking behind you.

                                                          ▪ ▪ ▪

The walk back to the hotel was shorter than you thought; maybe it was because you were so focused on Hotchner and the small talk that you stopped paying attention to your surroundings.

“Thank you, Aaron.” You murmur while grabbing the room key from you bag, “But you didn’t have to come up here though.”

“I know, but I wanted to.”

You could tell he wanted to say something, but he didn't dare to do it and it doesn't feel good to pressure him, so you settled for just smiling at him.

And in that moment, standing in outside of you room and looking closely at him, you realized how much you missed him. You didn’t admitted that out loud after he left the BAU, you couldn’t do it because you also never fully admitted your feeling for him. Partially it was your fault, feelings were never your thing and you were afraid of what might happen if you confronted him about it so looking for excuses and reasons to not doing it always seemed easier.

For a while you truly did believed that it was just a stupid crush on your boss, something temporary, until the days turned into weeks and then months, years even, but then… he was gone.

You couldn’t really blame him for that though; he had a good reason for leaving so suddenly.

“I’m sorry, Y/N.” Hotch finally mumbled.

You looked at him in confusion, “For what?”

“Leaving.”

“You did it to protect Jack; it was the right thing to do.” You reassure him with a smile, you unconsciously took his hand in yours. He didn’t pull away. “Don’t ever apologize for keeping your son safe, Hotch.”

“I know, choosing to be a full time dad to Jack is something I do not regret. It was something that we both needed it, especially after everything that happened with Haley.” You gulped at the mention of the name, remembering how devastated he was after her death. He took a deep breath, “But what I am trying to say is that I am sorry I didn't came back to you or the team, I should at least have called to let you know that we were fine but I got so caught up with the mundane life that it was a little too late by the time I realized about everything I left behind.”

To you.

Those two little words echoed in your head as you look at those chocolate eyes that used to drive you crazy without knowing it. You noticed that he was even closer now, slightly towering over you. It’s now or never, Y/N. You thought to yourself before speaking.

“I waited for you. I never told anyone but for a whole I waited for you to come back, hoping one day to see your demanding self in an expensive suit walking through the BAU doors again but deep down I knew that eventually I had to let you go.” You let out a breath that you didn't know you were holding until now and smiled sadly, “That was easier said than done considering that I never stopped thing about it, about you. Because the true is that I loved you, Aaron. Maybe I still fucking do… but I doubt that this makes any difference now because maybe you never saw me in the same way that I saw you or just because it’s a little too late now.”

You finished and Hotch frowned, probably processing what you just admitted to him. He was silent for a few more seconds and you took it as your cue, letting go of his hand and turning around to open the door of you room. “I had an amazing night, thank you. See you around.”

But before you could even step foot in the room, you felt his hand grabbing your wrist and your chest hitting his. The next thing you knew after that was that his lips were on yours.

Aaron Hotchner was fucking kissing you after admitting your feelings for him.

He pulled away before you could react properly, keeping his eyes fixed on yours; this time he looked at you in a way that you had only fantasized about until now, there was love and lust on them and you could feel it, just all those feelings that you tried so hard to keep locked in the deepest part of you.

And that's all you needed before grabbing him by the collar of his shirt and kissing him again, in a matter of seconds you two were inside the room. His lips were warm and the kiss quickly turned into a desperate one once the door was locked behind you, you could already feel yourself melting in his arms.

You didn’t even realize how it happened, but in one quick moment you were being totally pinned against the door with Aaron holding you by your thighs as your legs were wrapped around his waist. The position was now lifting your short dress, leaving your thighs even more naked but you didn't mind considering that now you could perfectly feel Aaron's hand caressing your hot skin. You move your hands from his shoulders to his chest, undoing the buttons of his shirt and stripping him off it, dropping the piece of clothing somewhere in the room. As you were doing that, he broke the kiss and moved his lips to your neck, nipping and teasing the area just under your ear, turning you into a moaning mess almost immediately. The sounds being like music to his ears.

“Aaron , please.“ You moaned, this was good but you need it more. You needed him.

“Tell me what you want, baby.” He asks, slightly biting the skin of your neck and you bite your bottom lip.

“Please, Sir. Fuck me.” You let out, noticing a sparkle in his eyes that you've never seen before and that only turned you on even more.

“Since you ask so nicely…” He said before walking to the other side of the room where the was a big bed in the center of it, Aaron kissed you lips and put you down in front of him, his hands moving to the zipper of your dress. “Are you sure about this, Y/N?”

“You’re kidding, right?” You asked and Aaron stares deeply at you, the sudden seriousness on his eyes making you gulp. You nodded.

“Words, Y/N. I need words.”

“I’m sure of this, yes.”

“Yes, what?”

Fuck, he was hot.

“Yes, sir.”

He bent down, his hands working on your zipper as he whisper “Good girl.” in your ear and you bite your lip once more, muffling down a moan.

He finally pulled down your dress, tossing it onto the floor completely and leaving you with only your red lace underwear; you weren't wearing a bra tonight, so you were much more exposed to him than you thought. He took one really good look at you before throwing you onto the bed, knocking the breath out of your lungs. Guess that we’re done playing around.

He kneels down on the bed, moving your legs with his knees and positioning himself between them. His hands are caressing your legs again, making their way up to the sides of your body and he leans in, kissing you again, your hands flew up to grab his hair, eagerly responding the kiss. You didn’t care how needy you seem right now, you’ve been waiting year for this, fantasizing about it, and now you had it, not really knowing for how long and that only gave you more reasons to enjoy every second of it.

“You know?,” Aaron began, his lips leaving yours and making his way down your neck, placing kisses all over your skin, “if I had know about how much you wanted me, I’ve would done something about it earlier.”

“Yeah?” You asked, arching your back as he bites one of your nipples gently, his other hand working on the other one.

“I would've pinned you down on my desk and take you right there on the office, baby. Not caring about anyone who could hear us.” He casually said, like he thought about it before and you moaned. You definitely thought about that particular situation too.

When he finally reached the place where you needed the most, he stopped and you were about to complain but Aaron shut you up by grabbing your ankles and yanking you down the end of the bed. He kneels again, parting your legs a bit more, placing one of your legs over his broad shoulders and kissing you inner thighs, slowly making his way to your soaked panties.

“I barely touch you and you’re so wet for me already?” Hotchner asked teasingly, rubbing circles with his thumb on your clit but over the fabric before taking a hold of them and ripping them out. And with no more words, Hotch held both your legs open and buried his face between them, making you moan in a matter of seconds.

He swept his tongue over you pussy swiftly, tasting my arousal first and groaning again your skin. A shiver ran through you as he stared circling your clit with his tongue and then moving down between your folds before going up again, alternating his speed and pressure.

When you thought that it couldn’t get better, Aaron proved you wrong by teasing your entrance with one of his finger and looking up at you, locking his eyes with yours. He wanted to see your reaction. You try to maintain the eye contact as he slowly started pumping his finger in and out of you, curling them an hitting the right spot, a string of cursings leaving your mouth.

It didn’t take much for your legs to start shaking around his head, the knot forming on your lower stomach.

“I’m- fuck, I’m close.” You breathed betweens moans and just when you were about to reach your high, he pulled away.

“Hold that thought, sweetheart.” He shortly kissed your mouth and you tasted yourself in his before he got up off bed, his hands immediately went to unbuckle his belt and now you took your time to watch him. From his messy hair, to the red marks on his shoulders caused by your heels -oops- and then stopped at the large bulge formed in his pants, you groaned at the sight of that.

Fuck, he is big. God, if you weren't so desperate to feel him inside you, you wouldn't hesitate to drop on your knees and start sucking him.

“Do you like what you see, sweetheart?” He asked with a smirk on his face while taking off the rest of his clothes.

“Just fuck me already, please.” You begged and he positioned himself between your legs again, but he was hesitant. “Hotch?”

“I don’t have condom on me and I doubt that you have one, Y/N. I’m clean but if you—”

“I’m clean too and on the pill so don’t worry.” You smiled at him and gave a little nod.

And apparently he was as desperate as you because at all at once, Hotch took grip of your hips and pushed inside you. You immediately arched your back, moaning loudly in both pain and pleasure, your hands grabbing the sheets at your side. You were surprise that you didn’t ripped them apart yet.

“Fuck, Hotchner.” You screamed and he didn’t move for a few seconds, letting you adjust to his size. He really is big.

“You’re so thigh, baby.” He moaned in your ear, the raspy voice sending shocks straight to your core. He was capable of making you cum by just talking.

That’s how much power he had.

And then he finally started moving, pounding in and out of you slowly at first and working his way up, picking up a pace that had you both groaning and moaning.

“F-fuck, Y/N. I love hearing you scream my name.” His lips attacked your neck again and you threw your head back against the pillows, giving him all the space that he needed to play with your neck. And he took this as a perfect opportunity to sneak his hand around it, squeezing under your jaw around enough for your eyes to roll back in total pleasure as you instinctively wrapped your finger around his wrist, holding him in place. You didn’t expect him to be into chocking but you were definitely not against it.

“Harder, S-sir. Please.”

“You’re taking it so good, just like I expected it.” He growled, pulling away enough to look at the whimpering mess that you were right now, his hand never leaving your neck as he pounded even harder into you with every word. “Calling me ‘sir’ and everything, I didn’t even had to ask you to do that. You’re such a slutty responsive whore for me, aren’t you Y/N?”

The sudden dirty words coming out of your ex-boss’s mouth did nothing but to turn you on even more, if that was possible at this point. You weren’t able to form a proper sentence so you limited to nodding and moaning his name. He didn’t like that.

“I asked you a fucking question, sweetheart, answered it.”

“Y-yes, I am, S-sir.” You chocked, the knot on your stomach forming once more and by the way that his pace flickered you knew that he was close too. “I’m close, Aaron.”

“Then cum for me, baby.” He commanded, continuing his thrusts and you were already oversensitive from his earlier work so it didn’t took you long before you started clenching around him.

“Fuck, Aaron.”

“Say it louder, Y/N.”

“Aaron!” He bottom out inside of you again and you moaned loudly one last time as your body reached its limit, hitting your climax with every nerve in you tired body.

“That’s a good girl.” He said between moans, his dick twitching softly as he release himself inside of you with one last and hard thrust.

He let go of your throat but didn’t’ pull out immediately after that. His breathing was a little erratic, his lips were red and swollen, and there was a thin layer of sweat all over his body. He looked disturbingly hot.

Of course he did. He’s Aaron fucking Hotchner.

It was as if these last 3 years had never existed.

Neither of you said a word as he slowly got up and walked into the bathroom of the room to grabbed a wet towel to clean you up, doing the same thing on him before putting back his boxers, you didn’t have the strength to grab your clothes so you just put the sheets of the bed on top of you, covering you nudity.

“Oh, sp now you’re shy?” He snorted, chuckling softly and you smiled.

“Shut up and come here.” You patted the bed and he didn’t hesitate on laying next to you, wrapping his arms around you. You felt safe, like there’s was nowhere else you rather be in that moment.

“Thank you.” He whispered after a moment breaking the silence, his face resting on your shoulder.

“For what?”

“For all of… that.”

“You’ve always have such a ways with words, Hotch.” You chuckled as you looked down at him. “Thank you for ordering my margarita in the first place.”

“It was a pleasure.”

“It really was, wasn’t it?” You wiggled your eyebrows at him in a playful way.

“How long are you staying here, Y/N?” He finally asked and you let out a tiny sigh at the question.

You knew you weren't here for a long vacation and neither was Aaron, you two have your lives outside this room , but being here now felt so good and peaceful. So… right. This, also, was probably a one-time thing, something that was destined to happen eventually, no matter how long it took.

But you didn’t want- no, you couldn’t face the fact that you may have to let him go again. Especially not after what just happened. I mean, how could you?

And little did you know that Aaron was feeling the exact same thing.

“Enough not to have to worry about it right now.” You answered with a shrug while your fingertips trace invisible circles on his back.

“Good. I can live with that, for now at least.” And then he broke the comfortable embrace by getting up and out of the bed, you furrowed you eyebrows and he extended on his hands towards you, “Come on, let’s take a shower so we can sleep properly.”

“Yes, sir.” You took his hand, getting up with his help and trying your best not to limp as you made your way to the bathroom, “By the way, where are you staying while you’re here?”

He turned around at the question, pulling you closer to him and softly kissing your lips before using a more serious tone to say, “In the room above this one.”

Of course he was. You thought while you watched as he began to prepare the bath for the both of you.

Funny how destiny works sometimes.

[bloody-bee-tea]

JC Love Month 2020 Day 2

Power and Pride

Day 2 of JC Love Month brings some fluff where the kids (mostly JL) tell JC that they admire him a whole lot, and even WWX is not exempt from that. Thankfully, that admiration goes both way. 

Jiang Cheng isn’t quite sure how he came to feel like an outsider in his own home, but it’s happening, and his otherwise empty table is probably playing a big part in it.

Especially compared to the cramped one, where Wei Wuxian and his gaggle of ducklings are seated.

It’s not often that Wei Wuxian brings them around after a night hunt, but they were close to Lotus Pier and Wei Wuxian at least knows that Jiang Cheng would skin him alive if he did a job in Jiang Cheng’s territory and then didn’t even have the good grace to drop by.

It’s just a bonus that he brought the kids with him, because Jiang Cheng would never admit it, but he missed Jin Ling. It’s not often that he gets to see him anymore, not with how he’s now Sect Leader himself, and it’s good to see that Jin Ling still takes the time to do something educational but at the same time gets to spend an night with his friends.

And it only stings the tiniest bit that Jin Ling didn’t come to visit Lotus Pier before, but Jiang Cheng pushes that thought far, far away. It’s important for Jin Ling to spend some time with people his age, and not just his family.

There’s an especially loud laugh from Wei Wuxian to something Lan Jingyi said and Jiang Cheng almost feels the urge to go over there and sit with them instead of a few tables further away, but he guesses he would ruin the mood.

He’s not pleasant company, he knows it, and he would hate to ruin the good mood of the kids. They deserve some time to celebrate after their successful night hunt.

So Jiang Cheng sits alone with his tea, and keeps half an ear on the rambunctious group. It has to be enough.

“So, let’s say,” Wei Wuxian’s voice carries over and Jiang Cheng might listen in a bit more closely at that, because he still remembers that tone of voice and it promises mischief.

“Let’s say what, Senior Wei?” Ouyang Zizhen asks, leaning expectantly over the table.

“Let’s say you’d have to choose the most powerful cultivator,” Wei Wuxian says, a laugh playing around his mouth. “Who would you choose?”

“Easy,” Lan Jingyi immediately says and Jiang Cheng has to hide his snort in his tea.

He would always bet his entire fortune on the loudmouthed Lan to be the first to answer a question.

“Zewu-Jun,” Lan Jingyi then says, full of conviction, though he only gets surprised glances at that.

“Why him?” Wei Wuxian wants to know, and Jiang Cheng is unsure if he has a higher goal in mind with this question or if he is just playing around with them.

“Because he’s ranked first, of course,” Lan Jingyi confidently says, and Jiang Cheng has to admit it’s solid reasoning.

Zewu-Jun is still ranked first, despite the fact that he went into seclusion, and the list is not only about looks. It’s also about the level of cultivation after all, so Lan Jingyi made the easy, obvious choice.

“But I don’t think he’s the most powerful,” Lan Sizhui carefully says, clearly trying to not offend his friend and while Jiang Cheng admires the effort, he thinks it’s entirely impossible to offend Lan Jingyi.

“Then who do you think, huh?” Lan Jingyi wants to know, clearly more curious than offended and Lan Sizhui shrugs.

“Hanguang-Jun,” he says, very predictably if you ask Jiang Cheng.

Not that anyone seems to be even thinking of Jiang Cheng.

“How come?” Wei Wuxian questions and then he gets that dreamy look on his face that Jiang Cheng learned to abhor so much. “I mean, you’re right of course, there is no one with more power in this world than my Lan Zhan, but explain it?”

“No one with more power over your already limited awareness, maybe,” Jin Ling mutters under his breath and Jiang Cheng almost chokes on his tea when Wei Wuxian lets out an enraged yell.

There’s chaos for a while at the other table, because it seems like the kids are entirely too comfortable to roast Wei Wuxian over his sickeningly sweet feelings for Lan Wangji and Jiang Cheng is very content to stay out of that train wreck.

They do settle down eventually, and they even get back on track with the question.

“It should be kind of obvious,” Lan Sizhui says finally. “He is the Chief Cultivator after all, and that means he holds the most powerful position.”

It’s just as solid reasoning as Lan Jingyi’s pick had been but Ouyang Zizhen shakes his head.

“You all got it wrong,” he says and leans a little bit closer to them as if he’s going to tell them a secret. “The most powerful cultivator is of course the Ghost General!”

“He doesn’t even count!” Lan Jingyi cries out. “He’s a ferocious corpse, and not a cultivator anymore!”

“But you have to admit that he is more powerful than both of your picks,” Ouyang Zizhen says and Jiang Cheng forces to unclench his hand.

He is still repairing his relationship with Wei Wuxian, he gave up entirely on every reaching anything but polite distance with Lan Wangji, but he will probably forever have some animosity for Wen Ning.

In the very darkest hours of the night Jiang Cheng can admit that it’s unfair to hate Wen Ning like that, that he wasn’t wrong about what he said to Jiang Cheng during that cursed reveal of just whose golden core is inside of Jiang Cheng, but that is only in the dead of the night.

During the day, Jiang Cheng reserves the right to still be fucking mad at Wen Ning for accusing him like that when it was him, Wen Qing and Wei Wuxian who decided to go along with the medical procedure without even so much as asking Jiang Cheng about it.

It doesn’t change the fact that Wen Ning is a rather powerful being and Jiang Cheng would hate to have to go up against him if he’s really furious. Jiang Cheng is aware enough of his own strength to know that it would be a damn difficult fight; and he couldn’t even confidently say that he’d win.

“You all don’t know anything,” Jin Ling suddenly speaks up, and Jiang Cheng is moderately curious, he’s not going to lie about that.

Jin Ling doesn’t like Lan Wangji—Jiang Cheng is more than aware that it’s his fault—but he admires Zewu-Jun and he is starting to build something of a friendship with Wen Ning, so Jiang Cheng is honestly curious to hear who Jin Ling thinks of as the most powerful cultivator.

Not to mention that Wei Wuxian is sitting right there, and for all that Jiang Cheng wishes it would be different, he doubts that there is anyone who could match Wei Wuxian at his Yiling Patriarch high.

“Who is it then?” Lan Jingyi asks, chin stubbornly set and Jin Ling glares at him.

“The most powerful cultivator is of course my jiu-jiu,” Jin Ling says, absolute certainty in his voice and everyone goes very quiet as they dart glances at Jiang Cheng.

“Why do you think so?” Wei Wuxian asks yet again, but his voice is soft in a way that Jiang Cheng can hardly stand and he has half a mind just getting up and fleeing.

But then Jin Ling turns around to him and pins him with his look and Jiang Cheng stays right where he is.

He didn’t know his nephew had already perfected that glare.

“Because he survived,” Jin Ling says. “Because he lost his parents and his home, and then his siblings. He had a destroyed Sect and a tiny baby to look after and he did it,” Jin Ling says and Jiang Cheng can’t hold his gaze any longer, but Jin Ling mercilessly goes on.

“He rebuild his Sect; and not only that, but he made it the most powerful of the Great Four. He raised the kid, that wasn’t even his own, and all the while he still managed to get the respect of the people he leads.”

“Jin Ling, you are my pride and joy, but would you please shut the fuck up?” Jiang Cheng bites out, feeling just a little bit choked up, but no one is listening to him.

“And he did it all without his own golden core,” Wei Wuxian chimes in, voice still so horribly soft, “because he even survived losing it.”

“He did a decent job at raising the little mistress, too,” Lan Jingyi says and even though Jin Ling turns to glare at him, it’s clearly meant as very high praise.

“He doesn’t just have the respect of his people,” Lan Sizhui suddenly says and shrinks in on himself, just a little bit when Jiang Cheng starts to glare at him.

It’s still not enough to shut them all up, but Jiang Cheng has to try at least.

“They adore him; they love him so much, all of them, and it’s so easy to see, too.”

Jiang Cheng doesn’t think it’s easy to see at all, but Ouyang Zizhen speaks before Jiang Cheng can get a word in otherwise.

“Oh, yeah, did you see how they all practically light up when he walks through the market? And they all give him samples of their stuff for free, too, and not because they are afraid of him or they want to show off. They just genuinely want to show him their appreciation!”

“Ah, but that’s not a new thing,” Wei Wuxian says and smiles slightly. “People always fell over themselves to make Jiang Cheng smile.”

“That’s not true,” Jiang Cheng says, because he remembers the times he and Wei Wuxian went to the market.

The people fell all over themselves to please Wei Wuxian, not him.

“Don’t be stupid,” Jin Ling bites out, and Jiang Cheng is taken aback at how mad he suddenly seems. “Do you even know how often people ask me where you are when I go to the market alone? No one cares about me, they only want to see you. I bet it was the same with Wei Wuxian.”

“He’s right,” Wei Wuxian nods immediately. “I couldn’t take two steps without people crowding me in, asking where their favourite was.”

“Shut up!” Jiang Cheng gets out, though he’s aware that he’s blushing bright red.

He knows he has the respect of his people, but their love? He never dared to hope for that.

“So, yes. My jiu-jiu is the most powerful, because he survived all kinds of tragedies and still came out on top.”

“You’re right,” Lan Jingyi nods and then everyone is suddenly agreeing with Jin Ling.

Much to Jiang Cheng’s embarrassment.

“Shut up, all of you,” he snaps out, “you’re all wrong.”

“Get over here then, and tell us why,” Wei Wuxian very eagerly says and winks him over.

The kids make space for him immediately, and they are all looking expectantly at Jiang Cheng, too, so really. What else can he do but go over there and join them.

He refuses to think about the warm, fluttering feeling in his chest at the thought that he gets included in this.

“Tell us who you think is the most powerful,” Wei Wuxian says, excited like a little kid, and when he leans forward, Jiang Cheng pushes him away with a hand to his face.

“Hey,” Wei Wuxian protest, but the kids all laugh and even Jiang Cheng has to bite back a smile.

“If you think I’m going to name you, you’re mistaken,” he tells Wei Wuxian who gives him an almost devastating pout.

“But I was so powerful back in the day,” Wei Wuxian whines and Jiang Cheng rolls his eyes.

“And then you died, so really, how powerful can you be?” he wants to know. “And don’t even get me started on the fact that you made it back, because you had nothing to do with that! That was all Mo Xuanyu.”

Jiang Cheng is aware that the kids are staring at him and Wei Wuxian and it occurs to Jiang Cheng that they have never seen them banter like this.

Like they used to do before everything went to shit, and it gives Jiang Cheng hope that they can repair their relationship.

“But who else could it be?” Wei Wuxian whines as he slumps over the table and Jiang Cheng flips his forehead.

“Sect Leader Yao, of course,” Jiang Cheng says, smug as anything when he sees dropped jaws all around the table and then he laughs.

“No, no, you have to explain,” Jin Ling suddenly says and Jiang Cheng calms down just long enough to do so.

“Think about it. He’s mediocre at best but he’s still around. It’s been almost twenty years and he still aggravates everyone at the Cultivation Conferences. No one killed him yet and he still didn’t die. Clearly, he is more powerful than any of us.”

“That’s right,” Wei Wuxian gasps. “He survived the Sunshot Campaign, and I remember he was amongst those who called for my blood, too.”

“And then he survived all of Jin Guangyao’s scheming, and every fight that happened since,” Jiang Cheng adds and it’s only then that Jin Ling smacks his arm.

“Stop this, you hate Sect Leader Yao, you would never vote for him,” Jin Ling says and Jiang Cheng has half a mind to ruffle his hair.

“But I mean it!” Jiang Cheng says but now Wei Wuxian also caught on to the fact that he was just fucking with them, and he narrows his eyes at Jiang Cheng.

“No. Tell us the truth.”

“Fine,” Jiang Cheng says and rolls his eyes at him, mostly so that he doesn’t have to look when he says his next words. “I always thought that my brother was the most powerful,” he mutters and this time the silence that falls over the table is a very expectant one.

When Jiang Cheng finally does lift his gaze again, he sees that all of the kids are looking at Wei Wuxian instead of him, and so Jiang Cheng does the same.

“A-Cheng,” Wei Wuxian says and Jiang Cheng is startled to see tears in his eyes. “I love you, too,” Wei Wuxian cries out and then throws himself over the table to hug Jiang Cheng.

“Let go of me, you gremlin,” Jiang Cheng complaints, but he doesn’t push Wei Wuxian away as hard as he maybe could.

“I always thought my brother was the strongest, too,” Wei Wuxian then mutters and Jiang Cheng has to close his eyes against the sting of tears.

“Ah, fuck,” Jiang Cheng whispers.

“No swear words at the table,” Jin Ling says, clearly out of habit but also way too late, and Jiang Cheng is thankful for it, because it breaks the weird tension.

“There,” Ouyang Zizhen says with great satisfaction. “He did a very good job raising the little mistress.”

It sets off a new round of roughhousing, this time between the kids, mostly, and Jiang Cheng takes the break to compose himself again.

But when he catches Wei Wuxian’s still somewhat misty eyes over the table, he figures it’s not entirely necessary to be his usually grumpy self.

He can let loose a little bit, with his family around.

Link to my ko-fi on the sidebar!

[geekygoddesss]

You

Summary: After Tom breaks the longest relationship he’s ever had, both of them seem to handle the breakup in a completely different way. 

Words: 12k

A/N: first part of a serie!

“You” chapter list

January 4th, 2020 - The night 

For some reason tonight Tom couldn’t keep his hands still. It was the first time in years were he was actually nervous, he didn’t like that at all. 

He has gone down a couple of drinks already, the night was still young, but time was running so slow he was starting to feel this exact moment in his life would life forever, and he was starting to grow anxious as never before. 

When he turned his head to the right, the only thing he could see were the blinding lights going all around the room, accompanied by the loud music and gigantic crowd that naturally came with it. If he took a closer look it was easy for him to spot familiar faces, people that were dancing and having fun without him, people he loves but that might be about to start hating him. Because he hasn’t done a single thing and he already feels like a bad person. 

Those bright green eyes he knows so well shined directly towards him, and he couldn’t not spot them as they turned to him, that was something that came with having a good eye sight. The face of his girlfriend was smiling to him, waving him to come join her, but he wasn’t in the mood, so he shook his head in denial.

He knew she wouldn’t take no for an answer, he knew her like the palm of his hands, she never gave up so easily. 

It was only a matter of seconds - and couple blinks - to have her standing right in front of him, hands on his shoulders and the biggest smile on her face. She was happy tonight, he felt bad. 

“There you are!” she yelled, even though he could perfectly hear her, but the euphoria was kicking her hard.  “Why are you sitting down?! This is a party” she fake frowned, as she took a look at him up and down. 

He did what he does best, act natural and mask shit out. After all, that’s all he could possibly do to avoid tension. 

“It’s called a small break, genius” he rolled his eyes, letting out a sarcastic tone that came out playful.

“Right, sorry” she said, going in to take a sit right beside him.

Feeling her arms go around his waist made him even more nervous. When he turned his head to the side, her lips crashed messily into his, greeting him peck, and letting him know she was indeed having a very fun night, but not only that, she was silently telling him she cared and she hoped he was having a good night too. 

I’m a bad person. 

That thought wouldn’t stop going around his head as time went by, and as he opened his eyes and saw hers, she moved over and went to take the last sip of his drink, he felt even worse. She was unusually happy, and he was about to ruin it from all sudden. 

Should he give some sort of hint before exploding the bomb? 

Should he leave it out for another occasion? 

Would it be better is he said it now? 

None, none of those answers seemed like a good option. He was second guessing himself and that was even worse. It was going to be a disaster and there was no way to evict that. 

Scratch that, I’m a terrible person. 

A couple of big hands landed on his shoulders from all sudden, making him jump in place and sending shivers down his spine. She got scared too at the sudden move, but she smiled right after, once she saw the face behind the small prank, and the one that gave Tom the scare of his life. 

“Baby!” Tuwaine’s voice busted in his ears out of the blue, and almost knock him out of his seat. 

“Shit!” He exclaimed, doing his best to not fall over “Fuck! Don’t do that, shitface” 

As he turned, he appreciated the face of one of his best mates and his girlfriend right beside him, both of them looking just as euphoric as his own girlfriend, and acting concerned for his lack of excitement tonight, which was good for a season like this. No work, free time, a night to remember… it was weird for Tom to be so serious, it was only on him to make it look as natural as it could be. 

“Why are you sitting down?” Tuwaine asked. 

“That is exactly what I said” (Y/n) argued, as he watched the pair taking a seat right in front of them. 

“I don’t feel like dancing tonight, I enjoy watching you trying to get some moves right” Tom excused, directing an awkward grin to his best friend. 

“I do a good job, compared to you, you just do alright” Tuwained mocked. 

Allison, his girlfriend, laughed “Good one” she giggled, pinching his cheek and grabbing the drink she has been sipping from for the last half an hour. 

They’ve been at this bar for a while already, Tom has lost count of how long it has been since they arrived, but for all he knows, he has done through a couple of drinks already, and he would keep going, but he can’t. He needs a clear mind tonight and he couldn't mess that up. 

“Another round, gentlemen? Tequila, (Y/n)?” Allison offered, raising a hand for the waiter to come. 

“I wouldn’t mind that” (Y/n) shrugged, showing a smile. 

“I’ll have one more too” Tuwaine agreed, nodding to his girl as he leaned on the table.

He had to admit he was taking this situation better than he expected. He held his girl’s hand, kissed her on the cheek, caught up on a previous conversation with his best friend, took the liberty to take another beer, and before he knew it, the situation was looking more normal in his eyes. 

It was the first time in months he’s been in a bar in London, he has been out for work and all over the world for so long, having some time to stay home made him feel calmed and better. After staying at his apartment, reflecting on life and hardly going out for almost a full week, it was the first time in a very long time he had a night out with his close ones and he was grateful for it. 

… but still he was extremely sorry for this night to be the night. 

With his head off elsewhere, he kept his girl close as he nodded at the words of his best friend, sipped on his beer and heard (Y/n) ask questions to keep the conversation alive. He didn’t comment or participated, he just listened, he didn’t want to take part in the mix and say anything stupid, he just needed to be present and act natural. 

It was difficult to remain fairly sober when he had to face something like this, it was his third drink already, and without intending it, he was going through it faster than usual, maybe it was because he was barely speaking, but as the conversation went on, the bottle became empty as time passed, and he didn’t like that. If he wasn’t careful, he was going to gain himself an assisted ride home and slide words of his mouth that weren’t intended, he needed to get ahold of himself, unless he wanted to start creating wrong opinions from his closest friends. 

The light shifted in the room, the DJ became inspired, and in the blink of an eye everyone in the crowd started cheering with excitement. It wasn’t weird at all, he knew why, those were 90’s songs, everyone loves those. The night was starting to come alive with every second and he could see his friends vibing with it, he could see it in how their faces changed and the mood lit up even more. For a second he felt jealous, very jealous. They were having a genuinely good time, and here he was, making a mess of his own mind by worrying about something that has been hammering him for weeks. 

He couldn’t wait to get it out of his head. He couldn’t wait to feel himself again. 

“Oof I love that song, that’s it” Allison cheered, grabbing (Y/n)‘s sleeve and jumping with excitement. “Bye, boys” 

As usual, she just laughed at her friend’s reaction and jumped off her seat at that weird queue, looked back at Tom suggestively and nodded towards the dance floor. 

He shifted uncomfortably. 

“Go dance, we’ll stay here” Tom assured both of the girls, silently telling Tuwaine to make him company. 

Surprisingly none of them fought him, like he was expecting them to. Allison just grabbed (Y/n)’s hand and took off to the dance floor, because she was already too drunk and she couldn’t wait, her body was in need of a bit of dancing.  (Y/n) looked back on his direction, giving him an apologetic smile that he waved off without even thinking about it, because there was nothing to apologize for, she was always apologizing for everything. 

She deserved to have a bit of fun alone with her friend. He knew she stressed a lot and needed a break, it was a good idea to just let her be, sing and dance until she could forget about whatever she was stressing about this time. 

She is a hard working girl, that is why he loves her so much. 

“You’re a bit off mate” Tuwaine mumbled to him. Moving on his seat to be closer. 

His eyebrows raised, he almost choked with his beer, but he groaned it off, he didn’t want to come off as nervous, although it looked like he was failing. What was happening to him tonight, he didn’t know, but whatever he knew about acting was wearing off, because he was failing at it, and now all he could do was face reality. 

“Really?” He asked, trying to seem surprised, but not too much. 

“Yeah” Tuwaine said, like it was obvious. “you alright?” He asked, genuinely concerned, slowly turning serious. 

Tom hesitated for a second. He didn’t wish to engage anyone into anything, this was something he has been thinking about and it was more of a personal fight, he didn’t want other people to get involved. However, Tuwaine has been his right hand for such a long time, he understood why it worried him to see him like this, because if it was his case, he would feel like that too. He couldn’t give him the benefit of the doubt, that would be mean, he trusted him, so he guessed it would be better to tell someone than to do this and have no one know about this beforehand. It would be like walking on it alone… right?.

“Yeah! Always” he assured, nervously fidgeting with the bottle in his hands.

 He thought about it for a second, doubted himself and then… he just gave up. 

“Actually, I don’t know” he let out, looking directly at him. “Can I tell you secret?” he mumbled. 

Tuwaine shot him a weird look, raised his eyebrows and asked “Right here?” as he looked around the room and moved closer to his friend so he could hear him right. 

“Yes” Tom nodded  “Just act natural, it doesn’t have to be a big deal” he warned, looking to his from and forcing a small grin in direction of the two girls dancing not too far from them, who would turn and look at them every once in a while. He didn’t want them to notice the tension that started to build up. 

“Okay” Tuwaine agreed, looking up front and mumbling “Whats up?”

Once again, he felt weird, but he needed to be an adult and be able to say this as it was, not with bad intentions, but still being real about what his thoughts were. It was his friend after all, he trusted him, nothing bad could come out from this… yet. 

“I’ve been thinking about... stuff, a lot, lots of things going around and after having some serious reflections about this, I think... I don’t know” he started, not really finding the right words to introduce the situation, because there were no right words to say this. It was just complicated. “I think (Y/n) and I...” he tried to explain, but he really couldn’t. 

He motioned with his fingers what he tried to say, finding that an easier way to explain the situation than to describe it with words. With both of his index fingers he touched them together and then moved them apart, as simple as that, there was no more to communicate. Tuwaine seemed to piece everything together way too quickly, and Tom was nervous what his reaction could be. 

“Really?” he whispered in a very surprised toned, clearly being stunned by that new. 

Tom nodded shyly. “Yes” he mumbled back. 

Tuwaine blinked, clearly being confused and surprised by all this, like Tom expected. 

He was aware that dropping this bomb would be anything but easy, and that there would always be a reaction from any of the parts. First of all, because he has been with the same girl for already four years, they love each other, they live together… it was a hard decision, but the hardest thing of it all, was that this was something that would have consequences in more than one aspect and they all knew that very well, it would be a chaos, he was absolutely terrified of it. 

“Wow” Tuwaine said, letting out a big sigh as he asked “Is everything alright with you two?” 

Tom pressed his lips together, now really getting nervous “It’s fine, it’s okay, it’s just...” he tried to explain. “Listen I’m going to sound like a real asshole right now but it is really the whole truth” he warned, because now it really could get worse from here.  “I think I want to be with other people” he said shyly, looking for approval in his friend’s eyes as he said his truth. 

Tuwaine looked anything but happy at that response, he looked deep into Tom’s eyes, took a second and nodded his way, giving him the chance to explain himself once. 

“Go on” he said harshly, he jaw showing some tension that made him even more uncomfortable. 

Tom nodded back, and prepared himself to make this one short and sweet. 

“See, I’m only 23 and she is just 21, we’ve been on this relationship for around four years and I have had a good time but I just thought about it and I am not ready for commitment, mate, I am young, I need to explore a bit more and see other girls other than her, live new experiences, you know what I’m saying?” He asked, turning to look at him. “I love her, I really do, but really... I think I’m ready to move on and explore” he shrugged “it really had nothing to do with her, I’m just thinking, hey, I’m still young enough to see a little more aside from the first girl I ever started a real thing with, it’s not like we’re married, maybe it’s time both of us meet new people” he explained, trying to make it sound somehow better, but it was just the whole truth. 

Tuwaine looked unsure and certainly surprised by his friends speech. Tom understood that Tuwaine was probably not expecting something like this to come up on a night like this, but the truth is that there was never going to be a right moment, and by this time there was a certain urge for Tom to let it out. He has been rounding this thought for a while, it wasn’t just something that popped out in his mind. It might be surprising, but it wasn’t random. 

“I don’t know, are you sure about this?” Tuwaine doubted “I mean, look at her” he said, turning to look back at the girls “She looks very happy now that you’re here, and I mean, she is pretty, smart, she loves having you around, she helps you a lot, are you sure you want this?” He asked Tom, doing his best to make him reconsider his decision. 

With this, Tom knew his friend was not agreeing with his argument. But it was natural, he was her friend too, and they were good friends. None of them would want to see her sad, but this is how things rolled now. He took a decision and he would stand by it. 

“Yeah, I mean...” he mumbled, looking at her for a second “I don’t want her to just vanish out of my life, I figured we could always be friends and whatnot” he sighed, shaking his head at the thought of her just… going away. 

Tom turned his head towards his friend. He was never seen him with such marked frown but still calmed look on his face, clearly trying to remain normal. He wasn’t feeling comfortable and Tom was already getting nervous, this is exactly what he wanted to evict. 

 “Don’t look at me like that” Tom begged in a mumble “Tuwaine, don’t judge me, please”

“I don’t! I don’t judge you, I swear” Tuwaine said, snapping out of it and holding up both of his hands “Hey, Listen, I think you’re making a mistake, alright? but  if you thought about it and you’re sure, then go for it” he shrugged, trying to show some respect to him “But be careful, okay? That’s all I can say, if that’s what will make you happy, I support you, you know that” he assured him, nodding his way and trying to crack a smile. 

Tom knew that was not the most honest answer from his part, that hurt, but he bought it. There really was not a better outcome for this moment. He knew no one was going to tell him it was the right decision, but he knew what he was about to do, even when it didn’t seem like so, he has thought this through. 

“Thanks mate” He thanked him, leaning in to pat on his shoulder. 

As time passed he grew more nervous, now that he has revealed his big secret to someone, not only that, now that he has revealed it and also was alone with the only person who knew his secret, he was feeling even worse than before. Good thing of having someone know of his secret was that he was passing onto him very good advice. He would tell him what she should say and what not to say, what he would do, his perspective, some past experiences that might help him… if anything, he was starting to feel this moment was starting to become a bonding moment for him and Tuwaine, sure it was not the best situation, but sharing this kind of information with him somehow felt special. 

Tuwaine would speak a lot, and so did he, trying to explain a little bit how he was come to this decision while he could, as well as giving Tuwaine the chance (and privilege) of commenting on his master plan, that might as well go wrong, but it could be less bad if he fixed some aspects of it with the help of his friend.

Their conversation seemed cut off when suddenly the girls disappeared in the crowd of people, and barely making themselves noticeable, appeared behind them trying to make it seem like a surprised, and once again completing the group that just a couple of minutes ago was incomplete. 

(Y/n) slid her arms around Tom, let him hold her hands as they laid on his chest and leaned over to kiss him on the cheek. Typical move of her, she loved to have him like this, and he was not mad at it, at all. He felt warm, safe, home…

Focus, Tom, God dammit. 

“Are we ready to go?” He asked, as he turned his head and let her leave a small peck on his lips. 

A small frown appeared in her forehead, as she walked around him to face him directly and hugged his waist to keep him close. He could see she was missing having the opportunity to have him this close, after months apart, she was missing him a lot and it was showing. On his behalf, It was wrecking him from the inside out, but he was an actor and right now he needed to mask this one. 

“What? You want to go already?!” AIlison exclaimed, sounding completely outraged by his question.  

He shrugged, hugged his girl close and left a small kiss on her forehead. He needed an excuse to get out of here, this was the best chance he could find. 

“Are you tired, bubs?” (Y/n) asked softly, looking up at him. 

“A little bit, I’m going to lie” he nervously laughed, shrugging a little “Jet lag is a real bitch” he said, but he didn’t mean that. 

Jet lagged has already passed. He has recovered his usual schedule for a couple of days now, he was fine. It was just the perfect excuse to get him out, he knew no one would fight him while playing this card. 

“That’s true” (Y/n) agreed, leaving a kiss on his cheek and grabbing her purse on the table. 

He made sure to turn back at Tuwaine with a suggesting look, so he understood it was time and he needed him and his girlfriend to vanish elsewhere. Right now he just needed to be alone with his girl and make every possible thing in his hand to not fuck anything up. 

“We can go then too, I’ll call an Uber” Tuwaine announced, finishing his drink in one sitting, and getting up from his seat. Queue for everyone to do the same.  

“Already? c’mon” Allison whined, showing a pout as she followed her boyfriend’s moves. 

“Don’t worry babe, I have an idea” Tuwaine mumbles to her, trying to make this situation look just a bit better. 

Making their way out of the bar was difficult, it was crowded, however, it is even more difficult to make it out of there when there are people around that knew Tom’s face, called his name, touched his shoulders and even stepped in the way to just wave his wave. Sometimes it could become very overwhelming. One way or another, and one step at a time, they made their way out of the place and into the cold and shiny streets of London at night. 

Tonight was not the most busy night for London’s bar, in fact, for them it was the perfect night to go out for a drink, but it was still crowded enough to build up a proper party. There were a lot of people around, however, there were not enough, so they could easily be able to step out in the street without getting mobbed with people recognizing him and only occasionally see a couple people around that would either call his name or wave at him, those were the best kind of nights, they were the best because he could chill and fool around with his friends without having too much eyes on him. Somehow it made him feel like he was just another guy going out in London. 

They stepped into the streets of the city, looking for their usual spot to call a taxi. Him having (Y/n)’s hand in his and guiding her through the small crowd in front of the bar and making sure she was with him at all times. It has just rained, he knew that, it was noticeable on how blingy everything looked now and it didn’t before, also on how this new fresh air ran through the air, he was not expecting the weather to change like this so suddenly. 

He looked back at his girlfriend, just to make sure she was not feeling the same as him or even worst, checking if she was cold so he could lend him his jacket if needed; she was definitely the kind of girl who got cold easily. Instead, the moment he turned around, he found her grabbing onto his arm just a little tighter and fighting her feet as she walked and  stumbled onto her side in a dumb move when she tried to step in. 

“Hey” Tom chuckled, grabbing her arms as a reflect “Was that you stumbling?” He asked, holding her still. 

Her lips opened, then closed and cracked into a smile. “No” she answered, standing up straight.

He looked at her with a suspicious look that she detected in less than a millisecond. She laughed, and before he could even notice her arms were all over him, wrapping him into a hug and clinging into him. He laughed, leaned into her and kissed her lips softly, hold her close and really took in this moment. He loved it, he loved this, but he would miss it, having her here and now was something he had thought about pretty often while he was gone, and now that it was happening, it was a shame that he was going to ruin it soon. 

“What if we get lost?” He whispered over her lips, kissing her cheek, and pulling her more into him. 

She smiled and nodded, making him understand that they were already going home, it was obvious. He nodded back, making her know, he was actually meaning something else. 

“What?” She asked, now clearly being confused. 

“We” he signaled “are getting lost” he announced, already assuming there was no way she would say no to this. 

Even when she doubted… he was right. She looked at him in doubt for a second and by the look on her face, it was clear that she would go with the flow of whatever he had in mind, it was just perfect. 

“Okay” she mumbled, taking his hand in hers and squeezing it lightly. 

Tom smiled widely, everything was going well, now he just needed to calm down, he could already feel his nerves spiking up on his spine, waiting for the worst part to happen and be over. He was turning more anxious by the second. 

Thank god he’s been trained to mask this kind of shit, it was really growing on him and the last thing he needed was making a show in the middle of a public place because he was incapable of ‘playing it cool’ when he needed to. 

“Guys, we’re going to take a  walk home” he announced to the couple in front of them, as he grabbed his girls hand and guided her with him. 

Allison immediately turned up to then and frowned. When things came out a little different, she usually made a lot of questions, but this time Tuwaine had this covered, when he immediately stepped in and wrapped his arm around Allison’s shoulders he was saving his ass from panicking, big time. 

 “Are you sure? The Uber is almost here” Tuwaine asked, showing him the lit up screen on his phone. 

Tom smile and nodded in response. 

“Yeah, we can take the long way” he shrugged, slowly walking back and taking (Y/n) with him. 

“It is a very long way, are you sure you don’t want a ride?” Allison asked, genuinely sounding concerned. 

“It’s shorter than you think!” Tom exclaimed, slowly turning around and making his way out. 

He could sense Allison just about to fight him into coming with them into the uber, but the situation was quickly diffused by her boyfriend, who immediately sensed, it was probably better they made their way out by themselves and not step into uncomfortable situations before anything could happen. 

“Leave them, I have somewhere we can go” He heard Tuwaine mumble to her quietly, thing that relaxed her and made any possible questions fade out. “See you Monday!” he created Tom as he walked away. 

“See you, mate!” he waved back, saying goodbye and finally getting what he wanted. 

It might raise some sort of suspicion, but this is exactly what he was asking for, a walk with (Y/n), that was it… 

Now he just needed to get it together. 

As they walked under the cold streets of London, Tom held her hand tightly and swung it back and forth slightly as they walked and he heard her speak, telling him stories and putting him up to date with everything. They made their way around effortlessly, already knowing where to go and how to get into quitter places where they could really be alone, they knew this place like the back of their hands, getting lost was easy, but really getting lost, for them was both easy and a pleasure. London is a beautiful city, but it is even more beautiful when you know those spots where no one else went, and that is exactly what they went for, a bit of privacy and somewhere where they could walk peacefully. 

With just a bit of patience and taking the right ways, in no time they were entering themselves into the best shortcuts of the city. Suddenly, everything so much calm than before, no one else was there staring, or speaking, or calling his name, it was just them on the quietness of the streets, walking hand in hand like dumb teenagers in love. For them everything was always like if they were dumb teenagers. 

He had to admit that for a second he really thought she would never buy that poor excuse he gave her to get them out of that place. In fact, he really thought she would be mad for him making them walk instead of taking a cab, however, it happened to be the complete opposite. She was looking way overly excited for having this kind of moment with him, she would walk around the middle of the street in a slightly faster pace than him, almost giving small jumps of excitements as they walked and going on into a story that clearly excited her. On the other side, he wouldn’t speak, he would just listen, made small comments and let her go on; seeing her being so excited was adorable, but he was already starting to feel terrible and it was showing. On his mind, he was trying to find the way to turn this around and make this be as mild as it could possibly be. 

“You are quiet tonight” She mentioned from all sudden, stopping her story and looking back at him with a comforting smile. Obviously trying to calm him down without saying much, like she would usually do at times. 

Right now he really wished that would work the same. 

“No, I’m not” he excused himself, shrugging it off as he turned to look back at her. 

She chuckled at his dumb answer. “Yep” she answered back, squeezing his hand as she mumbled. “Yes, you are” 

Maybe it was time for him to set the mood and get serious, get into something more than just an exciting story and tone it down, that way he thought it might be easier to introduce such a thing later. The last thing he wanted was to burst her bubble from happy to concerned from all sudden, it would be so much worst. 

“Sorry” he apologized, directing to her a bit of a shy smile “I'm just a little...”

“Stressed?” she guessed, cutting him off and taking him completely off guard. 

Words were struggling to come out of his mouth, he wasn’t expecting her to see him stressed, even though he was, he thought he was playing it off well, looking normal and relaxed, like he usually was. Now he sees he was wrong. 

“I get it, tour week it’s coming and you barely get a proper break, it kind of sucks” she mentioned, shrugging a little as she looked up front. 

I’m a way she was right. He was grateful mind reading wasn’t a thing, but in certain way, she had nailed the fact that there was something in him bothering him from that aspect. He loved his job, but sometimes he couldn’t help to keep thinking about what was coming next, even when he was on vacation. This is one of those situations, however, this time there was a plus. 

“Yeah, That” he chuckled nervously, as he looked down “Im having re-shoots after that” he also mentioned, keeping the conversation up. 

Her eyebrows raised. “Where?” She asked. 

“Atlanta” 

It was surprising he did not mentioned this to her before, being such an important fact about him leaving for work, again. He usually kept this to himself, although he wouldn’t keep a secret about him leaving, he just didn’t feel like mentioning everything he had to do; he thought it made everything seem a little overwhelming, taking things slow was a better option. 

“Wow” she sighed. “you don’t ever get a break, do you?”

He chuckled slightly. “No” he said  “I need to learn my lines” he also mentioned, almost as a reminder to himself. 

Another responsibility he needed to get his hands on before things piled up. 

“Can I take a look at them?” she asked in a happy tone, already looking excited about something like this.

He smiled shyly, acting as if he would think about it, but once he turned to see her, she already knew what he was going to say. “Sure” he let out, squeezing her hand a little bit as she jumped in excitement. 

He couldn’t say he was surprised about this, she was always trying to check things out when it came to his scripts. Prompts of having her, she really enjoyed all of the world of screenwriting, she always looking for so much information that it came in handy when she had comments over scripts he had to do. It helped him a lot and at the same time he hoped it helped her as well, after all, this was something she enjoyed with her whole heart. 

“I have exams in two weeks, you came right in time” she mentioned, changing the topic as she let go of his hand and went in to walk over the yellow line of the sidewalk. “Right before you leave, I’ll be starting my vacation, I might even grow a pair to see you in action, mister” she mentioned, making a funny face at him and winking his way. 

He laughed at her silly moves. She was the kind of person that every time she had some sort of boost of energy, it would show, this was one of the situations. She would walk over that yellow line trying to maintain balance and (for sure) acting like a little girl, she was looking for something to do as they made their way home and that would keep her active. It was certainly adorable. It was hard for him to keep track of the conversation as he watched her, it was somehow entertaining how she moved so gracefully and at the same time rambled like crazy as she spoke. 

“What do you mean ‘see me in action’, lady?” he answered, imitating her teasing tone “You’ll make it to the premier?” he asked, letting his eyebrow raise unconsciously. 

“Yes, to the premier!” she exclaimed, jumping in place. “I already have it thought out and everything, it will be really fun” she mentioned, giving a small twirl on her feet as she walked, keeping her little game over that line, never for a second letting herself fall. 

He shifted uncomfortably, suddenly feeling the tension over power his body. She had so much in mind, he did too. It was going to be an impossible task to burst her bubble in a gentle way because she already had high hopes over the future. He was about to ruin everything. 

He is a bad person. 

“I’m sure it will” he mumbled, not being aware of how it came out but suddenly realizing, his nervousness was really starting to show up. 

She turned to look at him, obviously noticing the sudden change in his mood. Her face showing a slight and concerned frown on her face. He tried to mask it with a neutral look, but it really was not working now. He just stepped into a weird zone and he didn’t know how to get out, there was not going back now. 

“What?” she chuckled awkwardly, trying to read his look. 

His eyebrows raised. “What? What?” he answered back. 

They looked at each other intensely for a good couple of seconds. Her trying to read him and him trying to act like nothing was going on. He was failing, of course, because once she took her eyes out of him, it was clear that she sensed something was off, and once again, she’d be right. 

“You’re acting weird” she mentioned, stepping out of the sidewalk and towards him. “are you nervous about it?” she asked. 

For a second, he completely panicked. What did she mean by ‘it’? Did she already knew what he was about to do?. 

It only took him a couple seconds to realize she was actually talking about the one movie he has been working on for the past years and that hasn’t come out yet, but it will and yes, he was nervous about that too. He was rarely nervous, but this was something that also had him at the edge of his seat. He was glad she could read into that too, because at the moment it was a good mask for his weird behaviour. 

“It’s my first movie for a overly famous company, I’m shitting myself” he nervously chuckled as the words left his mouth “Marvel is one thing, but this... Oof” he sighed, not being able to explain it well. 

The smile on her face was very comforting. “It’ll be great” she assured him, taking his hand in hers  “we all love Pixar and you are great in voice acting” 

He shrugged “I don’t know” he mumbled  “I was really nervous in the shooting sessions, I don’t think it’s my best” he admitted sincerely.

A shy silence fell between them. He guessed that  she didn’t have much to say, he didn’t know what to say either. The truth was there were a lot of things going on in his life that made him this nervous, those were things he still had a hard a hard time controlling and he knew that even when it killed her to see him like this, she didn’t know how to handle this either. Having him like this was fairly odd. 

“Is that what got you like this?” She asked shyly. He didn’t answered, he thought it was better to not say anything. She took that in as an answer and smiled. “You know my cousin always says something really wise that I don’t know if you’ve heard before but it says something like: tu n'as pas besoin d’impressionner tout le monde, fais des choses avec amour et les personnes intéressées se manifesteront” she recited, as expected, he didn’t get it, he had no clue of French.  “which essentially means... if you liked what you did and you worked for it, then people will love it, and if they don’t...” she shrugged “they don’t know what they’re talking about”

He smiled. 

It was nice how no matter what the conflict was in his head that bothered him in the most minimal way, she always knew what to say and I’m one way or another, it made him feel a lot better. This it was not exactly what he was looking for, but he gave her that. Watching her use her wisdom on him was a gift, he enjoyed it, even when it was not the situation, he wanted to hear one of those thoughts one last time. 

If it was the last time he would get to hear them… 

“Merci” he thanked her, smiling at her shyly. 

She smiled back, there was something her that told her that even when he didn’t say much, he would really think about what she just told him and just… relax. That was okay, that was all she wanted and needed. 

As they kept walking through those lonely and quiet streets, it was easy for Tom to find a way to change routes without her asking questions. Good thing about knowing this place so well, no matter where they went, everything could be a shortcut one way or another; before they even noticed his plan was going to perfection, just like he had planned, they were entering that isolated park where sometimes they would hangout, walk the dog, have a drink… lots of things. It was a not a strange place for them and it was the the ideal place to just sit and have a serious talk. It was just the place where they needed to be. 

As they passed in front of the place, he took the chance to step into the grass surface of the park and entering it without asking if she wanted to go there first, he just did, and almost automatically, he thought it would be a good idea to make his way to the swings. Pretty much the only sitting surface they had in the whole park. 

She walked beside him quietly, watching him as he sat down in one of the swings and looked up at her, waiting for her to do that same. The face she made to him was quiet funny, he was being somehow unpredictable and that was really taking her by surprise. At first she showed to be unsure, but after seeing that he was not going to move from that place in a little while, she gave up and just sat down on the swing beside him. 

The atmosphere had become quiet weird and now she was the one becoming nervous, mostly because how intrigued she was, but she didn’t let that show on her, she just went with the flow, she wouldn’t let a bad feeling let her make a fool of herself. 

“Why are we here?” She asked, swinging herself back and forth softly as she looked his way. 

“I just thought we could sit down for a while” he mentioned quietly “have a talk” he shrugged. 

It was weird, she thought, but she let it pass. 

“Okay” she mumbled, nodding a little bit and not asking anymore questions. 

She looked around the place, admiring the quietness that surrounded them and the sounds of nature that made themselves noticeable at this time. This place was surrounded by a neighborhood, a very nice one, that happened to have very nice houses with very nice gardens that most of the times served as houses for little insects and frogs that helped create such a nice environment. One of those houses actually happened to be her aunt’s house, pretty much the only piece of close family she had in the entire city to count on while her family was at the other side of the world, so you could say this place was no strange to her, it was a familiar environment, it almost felt like home. 

“Oh, would you look at that” she laughed, taking a look at the big white house on their front “Look who’s awake” she said, pointing out to the only window of the house that showed a turned on light. 

He hummed and looked that way. 

“Little Franky is messing around at three in the morning, busted” she chuckled to herself “I bet he’s - like - watching porn or working or reading, but he should be sleeping, that’s a fact, he has school or whatever” she mentioned. 

If there was someone she loved in this world with her entire heart was her cousin, Frank. Some may say they are siblings from another mother and the same family, but for her, that guy is her freaking soulmate. There was no one in this world that understood her better than him, and the fact that he was also in London, at the same time at her, that was priceless. They were used to being apart all of the time, having him close was just like a blessing. 

“Isn’t he driving you tomorrow?” he asked, in a poor attempt of being chatty. 

She smiled. “Sure, but only in the afternoon, I’m not the one who has to wake up super early” she shrugged, thinking about it for a second, seeing how her cousin’s head peeked from the window and disappeared in matter of a second. “Oh, I know what it is! I think he has some new friends in Paris, I heard, he’s probably playing video games, lame” she mocked, rolling her eyes. 

He laughed at her reaction, he sensed how much she would like to be there to tease him, but it was not the time. It was adorable anyway, their relationship was adorable. 

“You’re a bully, have you heard?” he teased, bumping his knee to hers. 

“Stop” she fake whined, now rolling her eyes at him and looking his direction. “I have to admit, I thought we would be going home right away, have some time alone for once” she shrugged, now being more serious. “Huh? you have been home for weeks and we’ve hardly had… you know, a night for us”

The chuckle that came out of his lips was the most awkward move that he has made in his entire life, and he has done plenty of stupid shit. At this point, it was impossible for him to mask anything, it was almost like his abilities to play it cool have worn out entirely. He needed to get serious and think this through. 

He didn’t want to do this and mark a wrong impression, he wanted to make things right, but with his nerves playing him like this, he was afraid he would fuck things up in a heartbeat. 

“Yeah, about that” he said softly “I kind of wanted to talk to you about something”

She was too smart. The second he said that in that tone was the second her face changed completely, she knew something wasn’t right and it was starting to concern her. He felt terrible for that, he didn’t like when she worried like this. 

“Are you okay?” she asked in a serious tone “Seriously, Tom, I don’t understand what is happening, you’re acting really weird” she said, a nervous chuckle coming out of her lips, as she looked at him directly and gave him all her attention. 

“I am fine, I really am” he said, immediately “and let me just say, you are too, there is nothing wrong with you, you are one of the nicest beings ever, beautiful, smart and there is absolutely nothing wrong with you, nothing”

He felt like he needed to point that out, he wanted her to know it was all him, not her, make it clear before she started to have second thoughts. Although it did sound like every breakup excuse, it was the truth, he needed to lay that out. 

“Okay” she said awkwardly “Thanks...” 

“I really mean it” he said quickly “there is absolutely nothing wrong with you”

“What?” she sighed, already growing even more nervous.  “Listen, you are really creeping me out”

He nodded, he was already starting this with the wrong foot, he needed to fix this up before his nerves betrayed him entirely. 

“Sorry” he apologized “I just thought it would be easier if we came here, somehow this place calms me down” he admitted, looking around and taking a short second to breath. The tension was building up quicker than he anticipated

“Because is the only place no one is eavesdropping?” she asked, her eyebrow raising in question. 

“And because I know that every time I am here, you are always with me, no matter if you are actually here or in my mind, you just… make me company” he mumbled. 

Somehow his hand managed to find hers, and he held her tight for a good second. Already refusing to let go, at least for now. He just needed to hold her one more time, even if it was the last time he would have the chance… 

“Something is bothering you, something other than your job” she said, stating the situation without asking what was happening, again. 

He nodded, her statements were right, just now in the way she thought. 

“Take a break, let’s go home” she insisted, squeezing his hand and encouraging him to get up and go home. 

Without her noticing, she was silently encouraging exactly what he has been struggling to say in weeks, and she had no idea. He has been rounding this for a long time, it was finally time to say it out loud and see what happened. Now is the time, it’s something he needed to do and now that they were at this point of the night and right where he planned to be, it was time. 

He looked at her straight in the eyes, took a deep breathe and just said it. It was just as easy as that. 

“I’ve been thinking about this a lot, I think it might be good for us if we took a break” he finally said to her, being careful with his words and keeping it simple. 

It was not easy to let this out, but once he did, it felt like taking a weight off his shoulders. If it should feel like that or not… for him it felt great. 

After he said that, she paused for a second. It was clear that she didn’t know what to say or how to react, it was too sudden and she wasn’t ready for something like this. Whatever she could do or say now, he didn’t know. 

“A what?” she asked in confusion “When I- I didn’t mean you took a break like this, silly, I meant a break from work, what do you mean a break?” She mentioned nervously, struggling to really understand what was happening “Tom, what do you mean?” She asked again.  

He noticed it was being difficult for her to process the bomb that he just dropped to her. She understood perfectly, but she could only hope that she misunderstood the situation and it was only a joke he was trying to play. It was not. 

“I mean, maybe we should take some time to see other people, take a break from each other and maybe if we don’t feel comfortable and we’re both up to it...” 

…go back, he implied, hoping he had made himself clear on what he tried to say. 

I’m situations like this, it was very difficult to not look like the bad guy, but at the same time, it was even more difficult to handle the whole conversation without saying the wrong thing and make it as easy as he could. He didn’t want her to feel bad or cry, but that was impossible because it was already happening, the fact it was getting out of hand without him intending it was frustrating. 

He wanted to take a hold of it. He didn’t want this to end up like in a wrong way, but it was failing quicker than he thought and it scared him.

“Did I do something?” She asked, her voice broken and eyes shining. 

The atmosphere was slowly changing around her. Her breathing was heavier, she was quiet, her hands tried to stay still and the flow panic that flew out of her head without her noticing was impressing. He felt terrible. He was the one responsible for breaking her bubble, she was happy, and now she was not, she was crying. It was all on him. 

“You didn’t do anything” he made clear once again. “I just think we should take some time for each other, we see each other all of the time when I’m out of work, we have lived together for two years, there is not a time ever were we aren’t alone, do you know what I mean?” he tried to explain, as best as he could “Baby, I love you more than you could ever imagine, but we are young and I need space… we need space” 

At the mention of space, she sobbed. If there was something she was terrified of, was space. She never had a problem with leaving him be and let him do whatever he wanted, that applied to her as well, she liked to have liberty herself, but there was something inside of her, a big irrational fear of being alone without the ones she loved around her. 

He knew very well how anxious this made her and how sensitive this topic was, he has heard stories and he knows she was completely terrified of people leaving her. This was not the case, he would never let this be the case, he would never leave her life just like so. 

“Couples that take breaks never get back together” she mumbled. 

“We could be the exception” he argued. 

“How?!” she snapped, breaking the peace of the silence of the night and for once, showing this small contained anger she had inside. 

More than anger, what she had was a lot of questions. It didn’t made sense in her head how he has decided to bring this up now and the fact that it was so sudden made her struggle. She was scared of what could possible happen next, she was too used to this… what is going to happen now?. 

“You’re not making this any easier” he mumbled, getting even more nervous himself, now that she was having this reaction. 

“So was this…?” she tried saying, but her breathing was too heavy, she could hardly speak. “Why? Why are you doing this? Where is this coming from?” she rambled, not containing herself at all. 

“Darling” he mumbled “Calm down first, lets just talk, the least thing I want to do is hurt you” he said softly. 

“You’re hurting me now” she whispered back, breaking his heart slowly. 

 He made sure to hold her hand tight and run his finger on the back of it. He was hoping it would help calm down, it would usually work, but he guessed it wouldn’t be that easy this time.

This was really fucked up.

She was crying and he didn’t know what to do or say. Before he could even notice, he was actually on his knees in front of her, watching from another angle how she cried and poured her heart out. He held her hands tight and tried to keep it together.

 He hated this so much, but it necessary, this was something they needed for the sake of both of their relationship. He didn’t pretend to be selfish, he just needed to state that it might be the time for them to separate for a little while, even if it hurt, it was time, sooner or later, this had to happen. 

“We’ve been together for four years” he explained softly “I love you, you know that, but... don’t you ever wonder how it would be to be with someone else? have a moment for you? live with no attachments, at all?” he asked, trying to state his point. 

“No” she said in a outraged tone. 

He was not surprised, she was a very introverted person; once she got comfortable around something, she could spend her whole life around it and not be bothered at all, she liked routine and stability, it was just how she was. For him it was the complete opposite, he liked to shake things up every once in a while, so much of the same drove him crazy and sometimes he just needed to see different things. It wasn’t his fault, he was just like that. 

“Well I do” he said, still in a calmed tone.“Call me insane, but I’m curious; and even when I wished I didn’t have to leave you, or something else, I figured, I want to be honest with you no matter what” he admitted, holding her hands close to him he whispered a soft “I love you” and kissed the back of them softly. “I just ask you for a couple of weeks, a month maybe, not even” he almost begged, still being very consistent with his proposal. 

Her silence remained intact for a while, she seemed unable to speak or elaborate something appropriate for this moment, she just stared at him, on his knees in front of her and begging for her to understand what went to his mind. She wanted to, she really did, but there was something else inside of her that told her this was very wrong and it was not fair this was even happening. 

“Correct me if I’m wrong but” she started saying, in an attempt to speak normally  “Are you breaking up with me because you want to be with someone else? Are you bored of me?”

He didn’t know how to answer to that, it was difficult to answer that without sounding like an asshole and she was asking difficult questions. 

“It’s not like that” he mumbled. 

“Then, correct yourself, because it sounds like that” she argued, sniffing as tears left her eyes, demanding for a proper answer. 

At this moment he decided, this was going to be a difficult conversation to get around, so if he wanted to make this clearer he needed to be transparent with her. Trying to make this friendlier to not hurt her was going to fail anyway, he needed to get this out of the way and be honest. He was already stepping on this, the only thing he had left was finishing it. 

They could be here all night, but if he didn’t tell her the truth, they would never get to a solid point.  

“I just want to have a moment for myself” he snapped, finally confessing what was in his mind “Not like a man who has a distance relationship, because god knows how many times we’ve been over that, I want to feel how it is to be single” he said “I know this terrible and you will probably hate me after this but the only thing I want is… be”  

“And then what? Take me back? I’m not a toy, Holland, you can’t just leave me aside and then take me back whenever you feel like it” she argued, a big frown growing on her forehead as she spoke. 

Her hands left his in an abrupt move, he could almost feel how she was drifting away from him slowly. He wanted to stop that, get her back. Things were getting out of hand too quickly and he was terrified. 

“You’re not understanding my point” he said in a very serious tone. “I’m not doing this just for myself, I think this will be healthy for both of us” he whispered. “We’re young adults; with my job and the amount of compromise I have with so many people, I don’t feel like I’m on the right mindset for anything” he explained, still trying to make things clear. “I love being with you, don’t ever believe that I don’t, but I just want to feel what it is to be single and just...” he motioned “free of everything” 

The feeling of the air feeling his lungs was too potent, this much explaining was too much for him, especially at this time of the night, when he was half drunk and tired to keep up with this. 

“Is that supposed to mean that I am a responsibility for you?” she mumbled, her voice getting darker as she spoke. 

“Babe, of course” he said, her mouth widened in surprise instantly; he said the wrong thing and he knew it well. “not in a bad way, obviously, you’re my girl, I don’t want to lose you, not now or ever, but maybe taking this break will help us... revive the flame” 

As soon as he saw the chance, he grabbed both of her hands in his again and kissed the back of them softly. She didn’t resist it, but there was something in the air that told him she wasn’t comfortable. 

He was a bad person. 

Looking away from his face and into the dark sky of the night, she took a good breath and cried. She cried because it was the only thing she could do to drain her feelings without making this situation worst, even when he started it. 

“I-I-I…” she stuttered, trying to say something “Since when have you wanted to…?” she asked, not being able to finish the phrase. 

She didn’t need to, he knew perfectly what she meant. It was fair that she asked that, she had the right to know and he had the right to explain it all. 

“Since the last time I left” he confessed, opening up to her “I know, I know what you’re thinking and I know it took me the longest time to tell you about this, but I just… I wanted to tell you in person” he said softly “I feel like we have been on a cycle since we started dating, understand me, I just need a breather, I feel like a need a change in my life to get back on track later” he shrugged “This has nothing to do with you, it’s all me, I promise; it hurts for both of us, I am just begging you, let’s give us some time, live our lives, take a break and see how we feel, for once” he begged her, hoping she would understand and know what was happening through his brain. 

“But I don’t want to lose you” she mumbled. 

“I don’t want to lose you either, and you won’t” he assured her, kissing the back of her hands “I just want to clear my mind, I want you to have you space, relax, let both of us have time for ourselves… not spend all of the time together” he explained one more time “honestly, I’m annoying, don’t you get sick of me?” 

He wished this make her feel a lot better. A small smile came out of her lips but there was still sadness in her eyes. She didn’t want to let go and it was too difficult to process everything that was just happening, she was never ready for this, she didn’t even know if the right thing was to let it happen or to fight it. It was a situation she was completely unfamiliarized with. 

Although there were a million thoughts running through her mind by the second. When he got back on his feet and leaded her to do the same, she was already thinking about his proposal and it seemed like she had no other option than to take it, because if he already had this decision made, it was impossible he would change his mind, things were already said, there was no going back. Whether she liked it or not, it is what it is and there was nothing she could do about it. 

“We can still be friends, right?” she asked. 

Tom tensed for a good second. “I think it would be better if we just kept distance” 

One of the hardest part of taking this decision was accepting the right thing to do was to not only be apart from each other, but to really keep a distance so things could work the proper way. One of the two of them would break down if they kept contact, so it was better to keep it that way, just until the time was right, he thought, for the time being they just needed a good established break. 

“Seriously?” she asked, almost whining at his answer. 

He nodded “Just until we’re ready” he mumbled “It’ll just be a while, love, I promise” 

He knew this was coming, it’s been happening for a while. When a cry came out of her lips he was the first to pull her into his arms and let her cry the pain away. His heart shrunk at the sight of her pain, but it was his fault and he needed to be empathetic and show support, even when he was hurt as well. He was responsible, but it would be good for them. 

“I don’t want to be without you” she cried, holding onto him tightly. 

She held him tight and cried on his chest. If it was for her, she would never let go, she didn’t want to let go. 

“It’ll be good for us, I promise you, just a couple of weeks” he mumbled, his fingers running through her hair. 

“And if you don’t come back? If you feel better without me?” she asked. 

Until this moment, he never thought about that part.

 What if it felt better to be alone? 

“...then maybe, it’s a sign” he said, almost whispering “Of course that won’t happen; we’re a team, we should take this as a time for meditate and reflect on ourselves” he said, looking down at her and mumbling “It’ll be okay” 

Part of her wanted to not believe that, there was always something in her that told her this was wrong and he was lying, but something in her heart felt that… deep down, really deep down, he had a reason for all this, and he was right. This had to be mutual, she had no other option than to agree, even when she didn’t want to let him go so easily, the decision was already taken. 

She looked up at him, really wanting to look into his eyes, looking for answers. Something in his face showed empathy for her, but there was also something in him that looked serene and peaceful, he looked sure of what he was doing, and unlike her, completely calmed with this whole situation. She envied his capacity to remain so calm. On his lips he showed her a small smile, telling her it would all be okay and there was nothing to worry about, that they would get through this and it would be worth every second, a smile that told her he was more than sure of it. 

She didn’t know if it was worth believing that. He didn’t know what would happen, neither did her. Him being so sure about all this made her nervous. 

Suddenly the biggest fact of them all hit her. 

“Distance…” she mumbled, once it all fell into place. “Where am I supposed to go then?”

Of course this was something she should have worried about sooner, he has and she did not notice about that in any second, her thoughts were too consumed on the fact her four-year boyfriend was leaving her. 

He shyly smiled, telling her, he already had it thought out. 

It was never a coincidence he decided to take this way home and come to this park in particular. It was never a coincidence they were sitting in front of her aunt’s house, because once they had this conversation, this would be her stop and he would go home, all alone. He already had it thought out and she never guessed what he planned, not even in the slightest bit. 

The shock of the moment kept her quiet, she was physically unavailable to speak for a solid couple minutes. Given the time, he decided it was time for her to go where she needed to, so he walked her to the door, it was the least he could do. The fact she would probably get in trouble for knocking at his aunt’s door and ask to stay at this time, that was the least of their problems, he had it already talked out, so the hardest part of the night would be definitely saying goodbye. He wanted to make it as smooth as possible, but letting her go just like this was never going to be easy. 

“You can send whoever you want to pick up your clothes and everything you need, even yourself if you want” he let her know as they stepped into the front door. “Just for a couple of weeks, or however you think it is necessary, my door is always open if you need anything” he let her know. 

She nodded. “This the last time I will see you, then”  she said, he nodded back. 

“Just until the time is right” he let her know. 

And if it wasn’t right… it would be the last time. 

“Will you… call me or anything?” she asked innocently, fearing this would truly be the last time they would ever see each other. 

Fearing this would only be the start of her worst nightmare. 

“Like I said, I think it would be better if we kept distance” he said, a sad smile showing on his face “but please call me if something happens, anything, for you I will pick up in a second” he said, being sure of every single one of his words. 

It was needless to say that he only meant this for necessary things. She knew she wouldn’t be able to make contact with him like before, what he meant right now was only referred to strictly necessary problems, not just any conversation. He would be there for her, but if it was just a casual thing, he wouldn’t be picking up the phone, she would have to look for someone else to talk to. 

She never thought this would be happening to them. 

“So this is a goodbye” she mumbled “I love you” she said, meaning every single one of her words “and I’m sorry”

His heart broke at the sound of her words. It was not fair that she said that, but he took it, she felt guilty even when she didn’t need to, he couldn’t blame her. This was too sudden, she couldn’t think straight. 

“I love you so much” he said in clear words, walking up to her. “you don’t have to apologize for anything”

She smiled, already stating an answer, she knew that. 

It was a bad habit, apologizing, it seemed to be something she just did as an instinct and he was always reminding her of that. The fact that he was even reminding her of this in such a moment was ironic. 

Taking a step forward, Tom walked up to her and kissed her lips for one last time, not like it was a goodbye, rather than that, he wanted this to be a ‘see you soon’. He placed his lips over hers softly, and making them touch for only a couple seconds, to then slowly step back once it started to feel hard to get away, and before he could get attached, he kept his distance and decided to walk away, go home. Short and sweet, that was the plan. 

He kept walking, trying his best to not look back as he left her behind and made his way out. He wanted this, he reminded himself, it was hard but it was something he had to do. 

Of course, he wouldn’t just leave without making sure she would get inside, safe and sound; that’s why once he was out of sight, he stopped his pace and just waited, waited to hear that door open and her getting in that house, or at least something that told him there was no way something bad could happen to her while he was not looking. If any of that happen he would never forgive himself. 

Part of him expected to hear her cry at the sight of him leaving, but instead, he was surprised when he heard her ring the doorbell straight up. She would get in trouble for that, for sure, but as long as she got in safely, it didn’t matter. 

“Yes?” He heard a quiet masculine voice mutter through the intercom. 

Frank, of course. The only person who could be up at that time and the only one she probably wanted to speak to at the moment. 

“C’est moi (It’s me)” she mumbled through the intercom, speaking in French, only to assure him that it was her indeed. 

Frank was no stranger to the language, he was born in France after all, he grew up with it and he was the one teaching her, after all. It was like their way of communicating, their special connection.  

“It’s so late, are you drunk or something?” He said in a sort of annoyed tone, sounding tired and done with everything. 

“Please Frankie, open up” she whined, holding the tears and barely able to speak. 

“One sec”

The tension was building up quick, he felt so guilty. He guessed this is what it took to take such hard decisions. 

He felt the impulse of leaving at that moment, once he knew she was finally getting in the house. However, he decided it was better to stay until it was just him in that street; something inside of him didn’t let him take another step while she was still there, he wanted to hear whatever was said, but specially, hear her voice one last time.

Only god knew how much he was going to miss her from now on.

The front door opened, she was finally with someone other than him. Someone familiar. 

“Oh Chérie, what happened?” Frank said with worry, once he saw her “Est-ce que ça va? (Are you okay?)” He asked. 

“No” she cried, breaking down in a million pieces “He broke up with me” she mumbled to him, with a broken voice “He left me” 

Hearing her say that stroke him like he never thought it would. He never thought he wold hear those words coming out of her mouth. He left her, he really did and she really believed that. He left her, after all those years together, and he was very sorry. 

The damage was done. He has done what he planned and there was no going back, as difficult as it was, he did what he needed to. 

He got what he wanted. 

Tom Holland was now a free man. 

[yoonia]

[Teaser] Blurred Lines

➬ Title | Blurred Lines

➬ Pairings | Kim Seokjin x reader

➬ Genre | Smut, Sexual Tension!au, Teacher!Jin, Teacher!reader, Tattooed Biker!Jin

➬ Summary | A new place to live, a new job, a new beginning. Six months have passed and everything has been going well for you in starting over. The warm welcome from your students and peers have quickly made you feel at home, yet you still long to have one calm day where you wouldn’t have to walk into the school with a heavy weight on your shoulders and the air thick with tension. Blame it on him—the strict English teacher who keeps giving you cold shoulders no matter how many times you try to play nice. One night out with your girls and a drunken dare ultimately lead you to uncover what he’s been trying to hide. People do say that the quiet ones always keep the biggest secret.

↳ Ratings | +18 / M for Mature

↳ Warning | Slow burn, mutual pinning, mention of alcohol consumption, hard dom!Jin, bondage, big cock!seokjin, dirty talk, mild degradation, cum play, creampie, tattoos and dick piercing, idk I might add more as I write this

↳ Estimated word count | 10k-15k words

↳ Estimated posting date | Dec 2nd, 2020 Dec 4th/5th, 2020

↳ Excerpt

“I’m not so sure about this,” you complain as your two friends barge in through the front entrance of the bar. Though you know that you are losing the fight when they keep pulling you along with them and you have no other choice but to give in when the drinks you had taken so far slowly begin to sink in their claws in you.

Holli wraps her arm around yours so she can drag you with her. “Oh, come on. Our goal tonight is to try on as many bars as we could get and none that we’ve been into looks like this one.”  

Of course, they haven’t, since none of the bars you went to had looked anything like a bikers’s bar. And even under the state of tipsiness, you can still recognise this place as the one that you would usually avoid whenever you walk past down this road.

Both of your girls seem like an expert as they wave through the crowd, heading straight to the seating area to find yourselves an available booth.

The bar is nearly packed wherever you look. Only a few empty seats seem to be available, even with many of the patrons standing up, either crowding the pool table, lining up at the bar counter, or gathering in groups on the dance floor. Except that nobody appears to be dancing.

God knows how Holli can manage to snatch a seat at all through all of this, but she does it with ease. Taking one last look around as you take your seat, you are glad to have gotten a few drinks in from the previous bars. You would have never been brave enough to step foot into this place if you had been sober when you came in. Wherever you look, you see big, burly men drinking beer and laughing. Their muscles stretching out from beneath their tops—some wearing tight black T-shirts, some wearing white sleeveless muscle tops, either one had made their bulging muscles look like they are about to burst out of them—their ink work peeking out from either their sleeves or their necklines, and they are all wearing matching leather vests with silver studs on the shoulders, with a logo resembling a girl sitting spread-legged on top of a motorcycle and the name “Howlers” embedded at the back of said vests. You can even see that some of the men are sporting matching tattoos on their skin, though not all of them have them on the same spots—some on their necks, their upper arms, or at the back of their hand that is holding a glass of beer.

There are a few girls hanging out with them, some are simply sitting or standing close, while others are practically clinging on their men’s muscled arm. They are all wearing matching leather vests as well, suggesting that they are either members of their motorcycle club or they are here as their lovers, though the vests look much smaller in size and are a bit tight around the chest.

Waitresses with crop tops and tight plaid miniskirts walk around the room with trays that are never empty. They are always filled with glasses of beer that are filled to the brim, almost spilling as they weave their way through the crowd. The girls would occasionally stop on the tables they are tending to in between trips, chatting along with the patrons as if they are all old friends. And even through your drunken haze, you are pleased to find that none of the men are acting like sleazy bastards that might be disrespectful around these working ladies.

Damn, even those strong drinks Holli gave you still couldn’t get you out of your proverbial teachers’ shoes, it seems?

You look up just as one of the waitresses comes to your table, all warm smile and polite greetings. The lack of judgement in her eyes as she looks between the three of you sort of eases you down a little, and the apprehension you have been feeling upon entering the foreign place slowly fades away.

“Welcome to Anchor Roadhouse, what can I get for you ladies?”

Jennie leans forward over the table to make the order. “Cold beer for three, please. Oh, and with double shots of tequila on the side for each?”

The waitress nods. “You got it. Be right back.”

“We’re going a bit over the top, aren’t we?” you ask the girls as the waitress turns to make her way towards the bar to retrieve your orders, and Jennie only shrugs.

“This place looks like way more fun than the ones we’ve been before,” she says, looking around as she admires the sight she is seeing at all corners. You would have never thought that your best friend would have a liking to tattooed, burly men, but you are finding out all the new things about your friends tonight.

“It sure is. So might as well have fun,” Holli agrees with her, before turning to glance at your way. “But most importantly, we still have someone between us who has yet to do the dare.”

Ah, yes. The dare. You refrain from rolling your eyes as you are reminded of it. You have hoped that choosing to be the last one to do it would be able to safe your ass from actually doing it, thinking that your girls would have been too drunk to notice that you are skipping it by then.

You look around again, perusing the field and making plans, when you suddenly feel the heat of someone’s piercing gaze burning on your back, only to see that nobody is actually paying attention to any of you. But the quick scan around the room has you feeling quite intimidated all the same. Just how on earth are you supposed to get one of these burly bikers to buy you a drink?

You look at all the girls around you and consciously begin to compare yourself to them. Unlike these girls who are confident enough to flaunt their skin while wearing leathers and tight tops, you feel like everyone could look your way and figure out instantly that you are no more than a mousy high school teacher. Not even the mini black dress that you are wearing—no matter how tight and revealing it is—and the killer heels could hide it from the world.

The waitress returns just as you are about to give a closer look at the bar, to find your way in on finding a lone biker to talk to, and you are surprised to see her carrying not just three glasses of beer as requested, but a whole pitcher of it.

Everyone at the table looks at one another in confusion, yet the waitress simply sets down the pitcher and the clean glasses around the table, along with the tequila shots, and sets them all up as if there is nothing wrong with the order.

“Um—I’m sorry—” you try to cut in, “We didn’t order the whole pitcher.”

The waitress keeps her smile on her face when she raises her eyebrows. “Oh, don’t worry, Doll. It’s in the house. The owner wants to welcome you girls properly.”

You look at your friends again before asking, “The owner?”

The waitress cocks her hips once she is done setting up the drinks and tilts her head towards the bar. “Yeah, see the sweetheart standing right behind the counter over there? He’s watching over you girls to make sure you’re having a good time.”

You turn back to look at the bar as the waitress walks over to the next table right after Holli thanks her almost too excitedly. As if the night hasn’t gone any weirder yet, the crowd slowly parts way to give you the full good look at the bar counter.

And that is when you see him.

Standing behind the counter the way the waitress had described him is a familiar face. The same face that has your spine rigid and your muscles growing tense whenever you step foot into the school in the morning, knowing that your schedules will allow you to cross path with each other. He is now looking at you almost the same way he does it at school, the same way his gaze is locked on every move you make to have you feeling terribly self-conscious in everything you do when you are around him. Like every single move may end up as a mistake.

And now he is there, looking at you closely, though you are surprised to find him doing so without any judgemental look in his eyes when he finds you. He had discarded the ivory-rimmed glasses he normally wears, and instead of wearing his usual long sleeves dress shirt, he is wearing a black tight sleeveless top that puts his perfectly toned arms and shoulders on display, showing off the ink work that marks the length of his arms and all the way up to his neck, presenting you all the drawings and scribbles of words that you have never seen on him before. His fancy velvet coat has been replaced with a leather biker vest which looks exactly the same as to what everyone here is wearing.

You can barely get over the shock of not seeing the usual scowl that he normally wears at school, when his smile slowly grows upon noticing that you are looking straight at him, making your jaw drops even further.

This must be a dream, you wonder to yourself.

Because there is no way you are seeing Kim Seokjin—the strict English teacher that everyone is afraid of—standing behind that bar as if this is his own home.

But there is no mistaking the smouldering gaze he is giving you now, the same one that has been quite intimidating that you always avoid seeing him in the break room at school. Except that his gaze no longer causes fear inside you when you return the look in his eyes.

And he just bought you a whole pitcher of cold beer.

— © 2020 Yoonia, all rights reserved. reposting/modifying of any kind is not allowed. translations are not allowed.

[be-ready-when-i-say-go]

cal and reader broke up months ago and see each other for the first time again at a christmas party which was their favorite holiday together.

Gotcha! Reader Insert. 

Enjoy the Christmas 2020 Blurb Masterlist

Enjoy my full masterlist

______________________________

Calum knew this was going to be a bad idea. The second Luke mentioned the holiday party, Calum immediately knew he wouldn’t be going. Or at the very least, he shouldn’t go. He should most definitely not go to a Christmas themed. Not one that he had a sneaky suspicion that you’d be at. However as the weeks passed and the guys assured Calum that from what they knew, you wouldn’t be there and even if you were, they’d make sure to be there for him. Not that he thought he needed it, but it was a Christmas themed party above anything and everything and that just made it harder. 

Calum leaves the safety of the group to grab a drink. He had been nursing an empty cup for almost an hour now, mostly he didn’t want to go too far tonight. If he went too far he was bound to find that sad wall. It was literally a sad wall, but more like the wall of sadness. He’d get too drunk and the sadness that he had been slowly dealing with would overtake him again. And he’d curse everything all over again and he’d wallow in despair all over again and he’d want to hide in his sheets all over again and that’s not what he needed. He was making progress and maybe it’s just fear. Maybe it’s fear of the sadness creeping back in that makes Calum keep himself in check. He could probably go ham but he didn’t want to. He didn’t want the damn wall of sadness anymore. 

“Oh, sorry,” a voice calls out. 

“No, it’s okay,” Calum says looking up. He's not even sure what someone would be apologizing for. He catches movement, a hand snatching back like retreating from a hot stove. You. He’s staring at you. 

“Sorry,” you state again and then turn your heel. 

Calum grabs the beer from the cooler and then grabs another one too. “Hey, no, two people can get a drink at the same time.”

You turn back around and see the bottle of bee he has extended out to you. You take it though it’s cold and dripping with a bit of water from sitting in the puddle of melted ice at the bottom. “Thanks.”

Calum nods, taking in the antler headband on your head. He chuckles just a little and you take in Calum. The leather jacket, tanned skin still inked in tattoos, his chubby cheeks and the Santa hat on his head. It’s the only you gave him that matches your antlers. “It appears we still enjoy Christmas.”

You laugh just a little. “Yeah, it would appear so.”

He leans into the wall next to the counter of booze and tips the bottle of his neck towards you. “Do you remember when I tried to bake you Christmas cookies and nearly smoked out the entire house?”

“Yes, because you tried to set a timer for 10 minutes and set one for 10 hours and didn’t catch it until about half an hour later.”

Calum nods with a bit of cringe. “Not my shining moment.”

“Not worse than the first time we can to this very Christmas party and I got drunk off my literal ass and I vomited on your new shoes. In front of pretty much any and everyone that could advance your career.”

“We were outside and it was dark. Not that bad.” You raise your bottle at him and take a sip. “But what was good was your tree decorating skills. I haven’t quite captured your magic, not for trying.”

“The secret,” you start only interrupted by a sip of your beer, “is my mother. She gets new decorations every few years and us kids divvy up the the goods.”

Calum laughs. “Ah, was always your mum.” He liked your mum. She was always warm to him, let him help her in the kitchen whenever he would visit. She always sent him cards too, little silly ones just to make him laugh. You did things like that too. But you were more food based, you’d make new recipes or his favorite meals for him and there never needed to be any rhyme or reason for it--you’d just do it out of love. 

To be honest, he still liked you. 

“I almost called you,” you confess and you know you shouldn’t say it. But you’ve been a few beers deep into the night, even a shot or three. And the words are just tumbling over your lips. “Last week, a friend of a friend told them about this Christmas party and they invited me along and I almost called you.”

Calum perks up at the confession, even sets his beer onto the table and steps in closer to you. He leans into the counter and you’re still leaning into the wall, but your shoes touch at this juncture. “Almost called me, and said what?”

“Almost asked you if we should show up with your Santa and reindeer headgear but it seems like we were already on the same wave length,” you tap his boot with the toe of yours. 

Calum chuckles, arms folded across his chest. “I was told to wear something festive and this was all I had that didn’t seem like I was trying to win the ugly Christmas sweater contest.”

“I take personal offense--I bought those sweaters!”

“We won that year and I thank you for that. But I wasn’t looking for a repeat. Besides, everyone would know.”

“Oh, screw them. Those were good ugly sweaters.” The two of you share another laugh and Calum sighs, staring at the cut of jaw, the slope of your cheek, how your eyelashes seem to move in slow motion when you blink. He drops his head. He shouldn’t ask. He should keep his mouth shut. 

“What happened to us?” he asks with a sad sigh. 

You sigh and stand up straight against the wall. This is not the conversation you wanted to have. And sure, skipping down memory lane was not the wisest choice the two of you made. But you are not going down this again. You couldn’t. “Calum I-I can’t.”

He sees your gears turning, knows you’re going to leave him again and he takes hold of your wrist. “Hey, no. I’m sorry. That was stupid to ask. I’m sorry.”

You turn to him and see the sad creases in his brows. “Time is what happened to us, Calum. Your career’s taking off. I’m finally figuring out what I really want to do with my life and time’s just not nice to people like us in this stage of our lives.”

“What about now? What’s time doing now for us?”

You sigh, finally looking up at Calum and your heart skips a beat. “I-I don't know. But I do know is that I do still have feelings for you Calum. And that’s not something I can lie about. Not to your face. But you’re going to be leaving still and I’m still going to want you there. And we will always be slightly misaligned.”

“No, don't say that. Please don’t say that. I love you and I hate that the universe is not being favorable to us. But goddamn, I can’t let you go again.”

And it’s just you and Calum staring at each other. You’re not sure if you want to set yourself up for potential heartbreak again. But it’s Calum. The man that even sometimes you wanted to ring his neck for not getting it sometimes, always managed to get in the end, the man that always knew what you needed with barely a glance and was okay with silence, but always ready to give you a good time when you wanted it. 

“Then don’t.”

[nikrangdan]

cafeworker!ni-ki

pairing: cafeworker!ni-ki x female reader

genre: fluff, comedy

description: the cashier at the new coffee shop was so adorable you just couldn’t resist visiting just for him

**did not proofread

————

contrary to popular belief, you were NOT a social person

whenever you were around friends and family, you were always the loudest person there

like SHUT UP Y/N!!!!!!

anyways although you were loud, people still enjoyed being around you because you had such a sweet soul and interesting humor

everyone close to you knew that you hated talking to people you didnt know

but to all the strangers? no

they would think you were an outgoing ready-to-meet-new-people extrovert

which was so, so wrong

but ALAS, you had to talk strangers almost everyday living in 2020

(well lets pretend we arent in the middle of a pandemic right now)

moving on......

so you were in high school at the downfall of your existence

you used to have so many friends when you were younger ..now you only have like 3

and those three were always busy (busy making up excuses thats for sure) so you never really hung out with them outside of school

and on one fine evening after school you decided to visit the new cafe 5 minutes from your house

u were really excited because all the cafes were 15 minutes from your house so now u could just walk to this one if u wanted to !!!

but yeah it was in the middle of a small plaza that had cute buildings

you pulled up to the parking lot and was just about to get out the car when u remembered..

u have to talk to the cashier :/

who’s a stranger! even more ://

it was always so weird to you.. whenever you went out you always had someone else order for you because you just hated talking to strangers

you just felt uncomfortable and you couldnt help it

its not like you have never ordered for yourself but you would always prefer not to

and now that you think about it

this is the first time you have gone out by yourself

you did text one of your friends beforehand but they said they “had homework to do”

LIES!!!!

but you really wanted to try the coffee so you just ran with it

time to face your fears!

you opened the glass door to reveal a cute looking cafe, like the ones you’d see in movies

you loved it already

glancing to the cashier you’d have to be talking to—

hold on

you had to do a double take because WOAH.....

the cashier...

he....

wow..

you have never seen a boy like that in your life

you stood there for like 3 seconds before coming to your senses and standing infront of the menu

that was infrONT OF HIM

“hi, what can i get for you?”

HIS VOICE OH MY GOD..!?!?!

“oh um.. can i get a second to .. look..?”

“yeah of course,” he gestured to the menu on the wall above him

hes so nice u almost cried

your eyes shakily traveled up to the chalkboard menu and u began to ‘read’ the options

its like u could feel his eyes on u WTF!!!!

um um um *internally keyboard smashes*

you couldnt even think

the words on the menu were like gibberish

the ONE time u go out by yourself

this had to happen.. of course! someone had it out for you, you were sure of it >:(

picking a random drink you gave him your order

“uh can i have an iced caramel macchiato?”

ITS LIKE YOU CANT SAY A SENTENCE WITHOUT UH OR UM

u cant help but think hes judging you

he looks like that while u are standing there in old sweatpants your dads tshirt

“sure, what size?” he looks into your eyes after putting your order into the machine

god you felt your heart stop

his Eyes..... theyre so beautiful

“oh um regular” you attempted to give a small smile

hopefully it looked like one

“okay that’ll be $5.12.”

you dug out some cash from your bag and handed it to him

he gave u your change and gave u a small smile

“your drink will be out in a minute”

AAAAA

he went :)

he is so CUTE.....?!?!

he looked around your age too

sigh... you knew he was way out of your league though

you were gushing over him but he probably thought you were just another boring customer

while waiting u sat at one of the 2 person tables on your phone

and u IMMEDIATELY went to text your groupchat

‘GUYS’

‘AT THE CAFE NEAR MY HOUSE’

‘CUTEST BOY IVE EVER SEEN EVER IN MY ENTIRE LIFE’

‘WTF IM GONNA CRY HOW DOES HE EXIST’

‘WAIT BRB HE S COMIBBG’

you tried to quickly put your phone down without looking suspicious when you saw him walking towards you with a drink in his hand

“here you go, enjoy” he said before swiftly making his way back to the counter and talking to the other worker there

wow... hes so mesmerizing

you’d steal glances at him every now and then while taking sips of your drink

you were sitting there for like 20 minutes before you noticed you finished your drink

you totally forgot you came here to see how good their coffee was

it was good by the way

sadly it was your time to leave

taking one last glance at him, you threw away your empty cup and walked out the door

wow

u cant believe you got to witness the most beautiful human being ever

in your small town?? crazy

you were sitting in your car just thinking

WAIT

U DIDNT EVEN KNOW HIS NAME!

you mentally punched yourself but then you started laughing

what does knowing his name even matter, its not like u were ever going to talk to him anyway

LOL

*sad emoji*

but the coffee was good so you definitely planned to go back

and not just because of the cute boy

...unless....

*time skip*

the next day you went there was a week later at the same time in hopes that he was working the same shift

AND HE WAS!!!!

score! 1 for y/n, 0 for umm... any other person who had a crush on him too i guess

the cafe didnt have too many people since it was fairly new and also in a small part of the city

so when you went in, you were the only one there along with the two workers

“welcome, what would you like to order?”

NOT THIS AGAIN

he looked even cuter today

his messy blond hair almost covered his eyes

you shouldve forced your friend to come with you this time

you ordered the same thing as last time but this time he asked for your name

hmmm

“um y/n” you answered

your heart was always beating 2 times as fast whenever you had to talk to him

he wrote it down on the cup and after you paid, you went to sit down at the same spot as last time

looking at him is literally the highlight of your day

the same thing happened as last time, he came over and gave you your drink without giving u a second glance

>:((((

boooo look at me cute boy

nonetheless u continued going to the cafe at the same time as much as u could which was like three times a week

literally over a month later and u dont think anythings going to happen

u punch yourself for thinking the boy would somehow find interest in you

hes still indifferent to you which isn’t surprising since you’ve never made any kind of move

ever

but

he should know u by now

hopefully..

*time skip again*

it was a saturday

at this point you’ve basically given up on having a crush on him and now since its become a routine u just say you go for the coffee

not really paying attention to your surroundings you dont notice that the boy at the cash register isnt the normal one you see almost everyday

“hey, what would you like to order?”

woah WHAT

you look up from your bag to notice a boy that was definitely not the one that normally stood infront of it at this time

and you also noticed something on this new cashier

a name tag

how come your old little crush didnt have one????

this new boys name was ‘jay’ and he was fairly cute too

looking around the corner at the other worker u noticed he has a name tag too

you recognized him because he was always working when the cute boy was at the cash register

his name was ‘heeseung’

after taking in these new additions you answered to jay

“oh um.. can i ge-,”

“she gets an iced caramel macchiato. her name is y/n”

??!<_|#%[>~€\£~

you whipped your head around so fast to see who said that behind you

was it who you thought it was ??!??!

YES IT WAS!!!!

OH MYGOD

ITS HIM

you widened your eyes at the boy who wasnt wearing his normal black and white uniform

instead he was wearing black ripped jeans and a gray hoodie

wow....... and u thought he couldnt look any better

BUT OMG?? HE REMEMBERS U

“oh wow ni-ki, you know her?” the boy named jay asked him

“uh yeah.. shes a regular” he said before walking to stand next to you

NI-KI

HIS NAME IS NI-KI OHMHGOD

u thought his name fit him perfectly its so CUTE

“are you gonna get something too?”

this whole time you were silent because.. what is going on

your heart was being SO fast you thought that everyone could hear it

“yup, can i get the same thing? also im paying for both of us”

WHAT??/):)/$;##\%|

ur eyes widened even more it looked like they were gonna pop out of its sockets

u unconsciously leaned towards the boy next you and kind of put your hands up

“w-what?? oh um no, you dont have to do that” you nervously said to him as he looked down at you

he kind of had a smile on his face

“i want to.”

there is no way this is happening

“oiiii ni-ki” jay chuckled while punching in numbers on the cash register

“ill have both of your drinks out soon, you two kids have fun!” jay said before turning around to face heeseung

WHAT??!!??!

your jaw almost dropped from shock

millions of thoughts ran through your brain and you couldnt even process anything

u cant believe this was happening

it was like a wattpad story or something.. is this how u meet ur soulmate

your thoughts were interrupted by a hand on your back momentarily and u look to see ni-ki shyly grinning and gesturing u towards a table

no way...

you awkwardly follow him to a 2 person table next to wall and sit down

you literally could not hear anything except for the pounding of your heart

“uh sorry about that...” he rubbed his neck and sheepishly smiled

“im ni-ki by the way”

“y/n...” u felt so awkward u wanted to cry

“agh, im really sorry if that was weird.. i just didnt know how to ask you out.....” he trailed off

*passes out*

IM JOKING

Ok but u felt ur heart stop bc NO WAY

“wait what??” u ask, ur eyes bigger than the moon

“um yeah... haha i took the day off today to try to talk to you.. sorry if that was weird..”

HE WAS SO AWKWARD JUST LIKE YOU IT WAS THE CUTEST THING EVER

“no its okay!! im glad actually...”

“really? so is it okay if we hang out?” he asked excitedly

u did not think u could handle HOW CUTE THIS BOY WAS O M G...

“of course! sorry if im kind of awkward though” you gave a small smile

“its okay, i think i am too”

you two began talking about the cafe and where you went to school

turns out even though you two lived in the same town (literally 5 minutes away from eachother) u went to different schools for some reason

u talked for like 2 minutes before jay walked up with your drinks

“hows it going guys?”

“its doing good bro, now go away..” ni-ki lightly shoved jay and laughed

you giggled at the sight

jay looked offended and came right back

“that is not how you talk to your elders ni-ki! y/n do you see this?!” he scoffed

ni-ki just rolled his eyes and turned back to you

“do not ignore me young man!” jay joked

“oh y/n, ive heard all about you from ni-ki over here by the way.”

ni-ki’s eyes got so big you almost got worried

he turned around so fast and gave jay one of those ‘i swear if you say anything ur dead meat’ looks

jay obviously did not care

“hes always like ‘y/n this y/n that’ blah blah im glad he finally got the balls to ask you out because im honestly sick of hearing it!” jay laughed

u were blushing so hard

NI-KI LIKED U????

this felt like a dream

ni-ki pushed jay away so hard and turned back with red cheeks

awe

but yeah that was the beginning of the cutest relationship ever

u and ni-ki were so cute together <333

you’d always visit him during ur free time

it took like 2 months before u two made it official tho

and he was the sweetest boyfriend ever

[aewhore]

Drunk in love ~ Orange Cassidy x reader (NSFW)

REQUEST BY : @bestfriendshypewoman​  (I hope you like it!!!)

Summary: You go out to the bar with Adam after Revolution 2020, You and Orange get tipsy and you both get very handsy and flirty. You both end up back in your hotel room and it gets juicy. ;)    

Word count: 3500

Revolution had come and gone and it had been the best ppv for AEW so far. You had defended your AEW women's championship against one of your closest friends Kris Statlander. The saying in pro wrestling that “you hit harder when you're fighting your friends” never rang truer than when you and Kris stepped in the ring against one another. It was a hard hitting, fast paced match and it helped a lot that the crowd was electric the entire time. Signing with AEW was the best decision you had ever made in the last 15 years of your career, you were doing your best work and it was only getting better as your title reign continued.   

Hopping between different indie promotions means you made friends all over the world but sadly you didn't get to see them as often as you would like until now. That being said you also saw the people you didn't like a lot more often. Such people included the cooler than cool Orange Cassidy. It's not that you hated Cassidy, it's just he rubbed you the wrong way. It wasn't a one way street though, Cassidy wasn’t your biggest fan either. He would leave the room if you entered, he would ignore you if you both ever got stuck in a conversation together but now you were both in the same promotion so you did what any rational adults would do, and completely ignored each other like the plague.

So after your blockbuster match with Kris, you were bruised and beaten up as you prepared to leave the arena and return to your warm, soft bed back at the hotel. However just as you went to leave Hangman Adam Page came into your dressing room. “Hey Y/N, heck of a match tonight, congrats on successfully defending that title” He says as he gives you a congratulatory hug. You and Adam had been friends for many years, ever since ROH when Adam debuted and you were in a singles match on the main card. You had approached Adam after the show and you both immediately became great friends. “Speak for yourself! You just had an easy 5 star match and you're taking home the belt as well, I owe you many congratulations.” You laugh as you pat Adam on the back. “I don't know how you're still standing either, I'm absolutely exhausted and I can't wait to collapse back at the hotel” you confess to Adam as you go back to packing up your gear bag. “So you would be up for a champion’s celebratory beer at the bar?” You turn back to Adam to see him hiding a smirk like he already knew you answer. “Adam, I wanna go to bed.” you whine as Adam starts to give those puppy dog eyes of his. “Come on Y/N, were drinking buddies! You wouldn't want a cowboy to drink all by his lonesome after we’ve both had such a successful night” Adam did give some good points. The second you hesitated to think about it, Adam broke out into a smile.  “Great! I'll meet you in the hotel bar in 30 minutes” before you could argue Adam was already walking out giving you no option but to go drinking with your favourite southern boy.

You arrived back at the hotel to dump your luggage off back at your room first, while you were there you changed from your sweatshirt into a nice top so even if you didn't feel the best you might as well look the best. You left your room and headed towards the elevator. As you wait for the elevator, you reply to Adam’s text asking if you were on your way and if he should order you something to have it waiting for you when you get there. You got onto the first elevator that came, still on your phone you glanced up to push the button as you hit send on your demands for a free drink for Adam in exchange for your missing sleep.  You put your phone back into your pocket when you see you're not alone in the elevator, you were joined by all 3 of the best friends. You glance away to the mirror to fix your makeup. You hear Trent and Chuck talking amongst themselves about the pay per view that had just passed. It was no surprise not to hear a word from Cassidy other than the occasional grunt and mumbled “yeah”. You feel eyes on you as you glance in the mirror to see Cassidy staring at you in the mirror through his sunglasses. You raise your eyebrow slightly as you can feel your cheeks start to warm up under the heat of his stare.

The elevator dings when you all arrive at the lobby, you immediately turn to walk out of the elevator and towards the bar where you saw nearly every AEW wrestler celebrating another amazing ppv. You spot Adam sitting at the bar with two neat whiskeys in front of him and you immediately beeline for the much needed drink. Once you sit beside Adam the drinking begins, From beers to whiskeys as long as it was alcoholic you guys were drinking it. Since you were so small people assumed you couldn’t handle it, which couldn't be more wrong considering you put away a bottle of whiskey like it was nothing. As the hours ticked the crowd started to thin out in the bar but a lot of the remaining crowd all gathered around a few tables you had pushed together so you could all laugh and chat together. You were sandwiched between Adam and Chuckie T who were deep in conversation about the ups and downs of being southern men. You were drunkenly talking across the table at Kris who was telling you about her learning to wrestle on her home planet and how it compares to earthling wrestling. You were leaning your head against Adams shoulder as you normally did when the liquor was getting to your head. You glance around at your gang of coworker who were laughing and hollering as they told stories of their travels around the world before you eyes landed on Orange Cassidy, now without his signature sunglasses it was irrefutable that he was staring argyle at you, but as you focused on him you realized he wasn’t glaring at you rather he was giving a dead stare to Adam. This was thoroughly confusing as you weren’t aware if Adam and Cassidy had any beef. You make a mental note to ask Adam about it later when you were both sober.

You excused yourself to go to the bathroom and when you return you see that Chuckie has taken your seat and Trent has taken his seat, leaving the only empty seat beside Orange. You hesitate before sucking it up and sitting beside Cassidy, hoping he won't cause a fuss since he's busy chatting to Brandon Cutler and a few others. You pick back up your conversation with Kris which was easier since you were closer to her so it was far easier to hear her. Your conversations ends and you listen to Adam’s as he drunkenly rambles on about proper horse care to Trent and Chuckie who you are not sure if they’re listening intently or too drunk to even know Adams talking. You feel something on your back and turn to see Orange resting his arm around the back of your chair. You turn to face him and he’s already staring right at you with those strikingly blue eyes. “Can I help you?” You say, attitude dripping off every word. Cassidy sighs, he glances around at everyone at the table almost to ensure no one's watching before he leans in to you. “Listen i know we haven’t exactly seen eye to eye-” You interrupt him with a laugh at his massive understatement. “I mean it's hard to see eye to eye when we avoid each other Cassidy” he rolls his eyes. “Are you going to let me finish?” his voice had an air of dominance that you had never heard before causing you to stop talking immediately. Orange pulls your chair closer to him as the group around you gets loud again. He started to speak again this time in a low voice that demanded your attention. “I know we got off on the wrong foot, but I feel I have to explain myself. I feel there has been a misunderstanding between us..” due to how close you two had suddenly become you could smell jack and coke he was sipping on. “You see sweetheart I haven't been avoiding you because I don't like you, no no no quite the opposite, I’ve been avoiding you because I'm fascinated by you, the way you carry yourself. I find you incredibly attractive.” This was the most you had heard Cassidy speak in all your years of knowing him and to say you were gobsmacked would be an understatement. All this time you thought Cassidy disliked you and this is what was happening the whole time.  

As Cassidy spoke he rested his hand on the lower part of your thigh. You moved your hand to Cassidy’s side as you leaned in to whisper your response into his ear. “And here i was thinking you hated me but looking at where your hand is right now i can bet that you like me a lot more than you're letting on” the smirk on your face grows as you see a light blush grow on Cassidy’s face. You gently kiss Cassidy on the neck before you go to lean back in your chair but Cassidy doesn’t let you move too far away from him by wrapping the arm that was resting on your chair around your waist to pull you back into him. “Jesus, I always knew you’d be a tease” Cassidy growls into your ear “I just want to see how hot and bothered I get you” You run your hand up his thigh. Before Cassidy can reply in your back and forth he's interrupted by Adam. “Hey Y/N, I wanna head back to my room, help me up” You turn in your chair to see Adam doing grabby hands towards you. You burst out laughing at Adam showing how much of a baby he is. “Yeah ok Hangy lets get you back to your stables” you turn back to Cassidy to see him not looking at you but instead doing his usual too cool for school face, you grab a napkin off the table and a pen from your purse to scribble down your hotel room number. “When you finish up here come see me” You hand Cassidy the napkin and wink before you turn to help Adam out of the bar.

Adam was relying his entire weight on you as you approached his hotel room door, he was chatting your ear off about how fun the night was and how glad he was to have a friend like you.  You led him into the room before unceremoniously dumping him on his bed. He Immediately kicks off his boots before he starts to undress himself. “Jesus, Ok Adam at least  give me some sort of warning before you decide to get naked” You say over your shoulder as you turn to walk out of the room and to return to your own. “Ok night night Y/N” You couldn't help but laugh as you hear Adam wish you a good night, completely ignoring his half assed strip tease he just gave you. The second you shut Adams door behind you the anxiety in your stomach builds, what if Cassidy doesn't show but what happens if he does show up. The elevator ride from Adam’s floor to your own feels like an eternity. You get off the elevator and head towards your room. Once inside you put your bag down and take off your jacket. The pacing begins some time after that. You were a nervous wreck as you touched up your makeup and fixed your outfit waiting for Cassidy to show up.  

When you finally hear a knock at your door, you wait a few seconds to catch your breath before you look through the peephole to see Cassidy looking as nonchalant as ever. You open the door and before you can even greet him. Cassidy pushes past you into the room, slamming the door and pushing you up against it. You can feel his lips ghosting your own as you get lost in his gorgeous ocean coloured eyes. You lean up and Cassidy smashes your lips together in a wild and passionate kiss. Your hands went to wrap around Cassidy’s neck as his hand began roaming up and down your side, slipping under your shirt and massaging at the skin. His hands slide into your bra as he squeezes your tits causing you to gasp and that allows him to slip his tongue into your mouth. “Jump” he growls against your mouth as his hands lower to grab the backs  of your thighs as you follow his command and wrap your legs snuggly around his hips.

He walks you both towards your bed before he drops you onto the bed. You bounce as your ass collides with the soft surface. Your body lights up as Cassidy scans your body as he towers over you. You reach up and grab him by the collar to drag him down to smash your mouths back together. His hands return to roaming your body before he begins to tug your shirt up. You take the hint and strip off your shirt. Cassidy immediately attacks your chest with nips and open mouth kisses. You arch your back to get more from pressure and attention from Cassidy’s mouth while his mouth travels down your stomach. You giggled when he reached your happy trail, he eyed you as he began to unbutton your jeans. You raised your hips to make it easier to pull your jeans and your panties off completely and Cassidy throws them haphazardly behind himself.  Cassidy drapes your thighs over his shoulder as he begins to lay soft kisses and gentle bites along the insides of your thighs. He finally starts to lay kisses and kitten licks along your slit as your whines become full on moans at the pleasure you're receiving. His hands have a deadly grip on your hips keeping you bolted to the edge of the mattress meaning you can't do anything but lay there and take it as you start to be devoured. Cassidy’s kitten licks turn to long swipes of his tongue and his gentle kisses turn to toe curling pleasure as Cassidy sucks at your clit. Cassidy ate you out like a madman as you writhed and moaned below him. He eased a finger into you as you cried out his name, begging him for more. The coil in your abdomen tightened and tightened as Cassidy slid a second finger into you using his spit and your wetness as lubricant. He then begin scissoring and fucking you with his long, thin fingers. Knuckles nudging your G spot at the perfect pace as he thrust his fingers at an inhuman speed. “A-a-ahh C-Cassidy I’m g-onna c-cum” You cry out. Cassidy sucks on your clit to push you over the edge and you throw your head back.

You gripped his hair as you came down from your orgasm, you pull him up to kiss him and you groan as the taste of yourself fills your mouth. Your hands trail down his body as you tug at the hem of his shirt because him wearing any clothes is getting aggravating. He smirks at your need to see him naked as soon as possible. He grants your requests and you immediately attack his collarbone and chest with kisses and bites, he lets out a low moan when you suck on a sweet spot where his neck meets his shoulder causing him to suddenly grind into you. The feeling of his denim against your bare crotch caused a weird but euphoric rush to run through your body as he began fumbling with his jeans button. You place your hands over his in an effort to calm his nerves, you successfully get his jeans undone and he strips them off and throws them in the same direction that he threw yours. You had seen Cassidy without his shirt on before and you had seen him in wrestling trunks as well but seeing him towering above you in nothing but his boxers made you speechless at just how ungodly attractive he was. His slander build hid how much power and strength he had. You pulled Cassidy down to kiss him and you used this momentum to flip you both over so you were straddling Cassidy. Cassidy raises his hips to throw his boxers off, his hard dick stands up against his stomach and you grind against it for friction against your clit. He stills your hips by grabbing you and teasing your hole with his erection. You whined as Cassidy’s grip on your hips prevented you from sinking down on him.  

Cassidy smirked up at you as he lined himself up and slowly lowered you onto himself. The girth of it begins to override your senses as all you can think about is the stretching feeling as Cassidy pushed himself to the hilt. You sit flush against his hips when Cassidy starts to shallowly thrust up into you and your moans turn to cries when his tip perfectly nudges against your G spot. You place your hands against his chest for leverage and you can feel his rapid breathing beneath your palms. His thrusts become violent as his cock starts to throb inside of you. His hands trail up your body to squeeze and tease with your tits as you rode his cock like there was no tomorrow. You could tell Cassidy was close to cumming by the bright red flush of his face and chest and the groans that were just now becoming audible as he increased in volume the closer to finishing he got. Your hips started to stutter as your body tensed with how close you were. Cassidy lets his hand fall back down your body as he starts to rub tight circles on your clit causing you to be pushed over the edge as the coil in your stomach snaps and a rush of electricity zaps through your body. You clench on Cassidy and it feels as if you milk him of every drop of cum as his cum shoots, hot and thick into you. The aftershocks ripple through both your bodies as you fall forward onto Cassidy.  

After you both have caught your breath, you roll off of Cassidy to allow him to go to the bathroom. You can't help but stare at his bare ass as he walks away. You start to giggle before Cassidy turns back to you with a raised eyebrow. “I hate to see you leave, but i love to watch you go” He barks with laughter at what a horrible line that was. “You already got in my pants, you don't have to use bad pick up lines on me now.” You laugh at the savage rejection your brilliant line got. You stand on wobbly legs as you reach for a random shirt to wear to go to sleep in. Cassidy comes back from the bathroom with a washcloth and hands it to you and you wipe yourself off before throwing the cloth back towards the bathroom and curling up into bed. You notice Cassidy is still standing beside the bed not looking directly at you but darting his eyes around the room as if he's never been in a hotel before. You realize he’s debating whether to stay or go, so you make that decision for him by lifting up the blankets and patting the empty space. “Come on, cool guy, it's cuddle time.” He tries to hide it as he climbs in beside you but you see that small smile on his face as you pull him into your nest of comfort. “Hey Y/N?” you hear Cassidy ask after you turn the light off. “Yeah Orange?” your brows furrow slightly at what Cassidy could be gearing up to ask. “Are you wearing my shirt?” you breathe a sigh of relief at the simple question. “Um yeah” you say, gauging his reaction, silently hoping he's not mad. “Hm.. Cool” He pulls you closer as you start to fall asleep to the even beat of his heart.

[nekowriteshaikyuu]

 - new years with haikyuu boys <3 -

 𝕕𝕒𝕚𝕔𝕙𝕚 , 𝕜𝕦𝕣𝕠𝕠 , 𝕚𝕨𝕒𝕚𝕫𝕦𝕞𝕚 , 𝕒𝕜𝕒𝕒𝕤𝕙𝕚 , 𝕠𝕤𝕒𝕞𝕦

 — fluff, aged up characters, not proofread

 word count : 2,375

 a/n: happy new years everyone ! 2020 has been a really difficult time for all of us, we’ve lost many loved ones and had a really difficult time adapting to the lockdown situation. nonetheless, i hope you all are doing great and being safe wherever you are. let’s all be there for one another and enjoy life as much as possible :) i kinda got carried away with my writing so yeah hehe sorry if it’s a little too long. but anyways, thank you so much for all the support you guys gave me and i hope that you will continue to support me and my blog :) love yalls have a wonderful new years !! <33 ~neko 

— 

𝕕𝕒𝕚𝕔𝕙𝕚 𝕤𝕒𝕨𝕒𝕞𝕦𝕣𝕒

night picnic date !

you both sat in a good spot and enjoy your time together, looking up at the sky and pinpoint clouds that shaped like objects

you brought shoyu ramen which daichi enjoyed so much he emptied the bowl instantly. and also munch on strawberry shortcakes:)

you both stayed until night falls and the new years were counting down

you gazed at the stars above, unaware that daichi was patiently waiting for you to look at him.

“there’s so much stars today.” your eyes never leaving the dark-blue sky. you attempt to count every star you observed but it was just to impossible.

“hey daichi, what do you think of-” you stopped your tracks when your eyes met up with your boyfriend. he sat cross-legged comfortably, his hands tucked in his hoodie pocket. he gave you an innocent smile, taking out one of his hands from his pocket to pat your head. 

he loves you so much, so so much. to him, it was a blessing to bump into you down the hallways when you both first arrived in karasuno. the moment your eyes lock, it was like an electric current just waved past him. he instantly fell in love. and here you are now, stargazing the night before new years. he wants to keep you. he wants you all for himself, and no one can ever call dibs on you.

his other hand pulled out from his pocket, holding onto a small black box. carefully, he opened it, revealing a couple ring. he took a moment to recollect his thoughts, before taking out one of them and slipping it in on your left ring finger. he slipped in his then looking up at you. 

“i got us promise rings, to promise that we’ll always be there for each other.” he smiled, kissing the ring that was nicely fitted on your finger. you couldn’t help but blush so hard before throwing yourself onto daichi, hugging him tight as you let out tears of joy.

“daichi !!! you’re so cute !!” you couldn’t help but be honest. he laughs, hugging you tight and placing small kisses on your cheek.

“another new year with you, my love.”

— 

𝕜𝕦𝕣𝕠𝕠 𝕥𝕖𝕥𝕤𝕦𝕣𝕠𝕦

boy was feeling a little fancy tonight.

he threw a nice red silk dress at you, telling you to get dresses and get ready for a dine in the restaurant you’ve always wanted to visit

he was smart to get you a dress that nicely wraps around your body, showing off your curves with your shoulders bare. 

he wore a nice (and smexy) tuxedo with his top two buttons unbuttoned 

you pleaded him to buttoned them but he gave an excuse that it was only fair since you had your shoulders exposed and your boobs elevated.

you both arrived at the restaurant and had a great meal, before having multiple glasses of wine.

every second, he just stop his actions and admire you, how lucky he is to have you and you only.

“my goodness, that was a really good meal.” you sighed after emptying your plate. the waiter came by soon to discard your empty dishes, before returning with two glasses and a wine bottle. the waiter politely pour both glasses, placing the wine bottle on the table and bowing down then leaving.

“you didn’t say we’re having wine tonight.” you glared at your boyfriend but also slyly picking up your glass and taking a sip. he only sat back at his seat, his hand resting on the hand rest while his other supporting his tilted head. kuroo chose the best seat out of all the seats in the restaurant. right by the glass window, where there is a clear view of the new years count down.

slowly you watch the numbers go down. your eyes never leaving the timer and kuroo’s never leaving your side view. he admired the sight of the beauty sitting right across him. the necklace he gave you for your birthday, the earrings he got in a carnival game, your lips tinted in red, the silk dress that was draped over your shoulders. it felt like a sin he could observe all these for free. he adjusted himself in his seat, laying back slightly with his hand supporting his chin, still admiring you.

your eyes continue to stare at the timer. five...four...three...two...one. fireworks were lit up and the dark sky was now filled with fireworks of colours. your smile widened as you hear the clink of wine glasses from other tables. you turned back to kuroo, who happen to be holding his wine glass already.

“happy new years, kitten. cheers, to another year with you stubbornness.” giggling, you raised your glass and lightly tap over his, both of you taking a sip. kuroo stared deeply into your eyes, the lights of the fireworks reflecting at your side.

he sighed, removing the napkin that was placed on his lap onto the table.

“shall we go ? don’t wanna spend the night of the new years without having some fun, huh?” he grabbed your hand and walked you out the restaurant, thanking the waiters for their service on the way.

what a night, you might say~

—

𝕚𝕨𝕒𝕚𝕫𝕦𝕞𝕚 𝕙𝕒𝕛𝕚𝕞𝕖

unfortunately, you had to cancel your plans on spending new years with your boyfriend because he was busy coaching.

but you couldn’t let this day go to waste without celebrating new years.

that night, you went to his gymnasium and spotted him just finished showering.

immediately, no thoughts, you grabbed his hand dragged him to catch up with the fireworks.

the door swung open and you stomped your way in, checking small room to find your boyfriend. at last, you spotted him drying himself after a shower.

“hajime !” you screamed, making him flinched from your voice echoing through the corners of the room. he turned to see you standing by the door, panting after running down the road to the gym he was coaching people in.

“y/n? what are you doing here?” he stuffed his towel in his duffel bag, zipping it close then hanging it over his shoulder. he made his way to you who was still gasping for air. he circled his hand on your back, instructing you to inhale and exhale slowly. soon after you catch your breathe, you grabbed into his arm, having a really strong grip.

“there’s not much time, hurry !” you pulled him out the room, running once again. he couldn’t stop you, only yelling at the back telling you to slow down as you continue to run up the stairs. lucky enough iwaizumi is an athlete trainer, his daily morning runs with you really boost your speed so despite you constantly gasping for air, your legs just won’t stop running.

iwaizumi’s wiggled his wrist out of your grip and adjusted so that the both of you are holding hands now. he continued to run, following behind you, his other hand holding onto the sling of his bag that was dropping from time to time. after the last flight of stairs, you both arrived at the top of the mountains. iwaizumi dropped his bag to the ground, his hands on his knees as he coughed over his dried throat. you stretched you back, groaning in pain after running without having to stop halfway at all.

“what was that for ?!” iwaizumi placed his hands on his sides now, sweat dripping down the sides of his face. just as you were about to explain, a loud explosion was heard and lights started to flicker up in the sky. you both looked up to see the fireworks, colour after colour overlapping each other.

“we made it !!” you threw your hands up in the air, laughing in joy as you clapped your hands. you rushed to the railing, leaning over slightly to get a better view of the fireworks. iwaizumi was stunned. because of his sudden cancelation of your new years date, you decided to drag him all the way up here to be able to at least see the fireworks. 

“hajime, hurry up and get here ! they look amazing !” your hands gestured him to come over, which he did. he leaned over the railing like you did, watching the fireworks go off. he turned to you, admiring your happy expression and your smile. he can’t believe you did all that effort to run from home, to his work place then up the mountains to see the fireworks. he pulled you in for a hug, caressing your hair as you both sway side to side.

“happy new years, babe.” he whispered to your ear. god, you’re really an angel.

—

𝕒𝕜𝕒𝕒𝕤𝕙𝕚 𝕜𝕖𝕚𝕛𝕚

being friends ever since highschool, you both hung out almost every day

no matter how hard you tried though, you could never

e v e r

get over the fact you have a crush on him

you felt like your feelings will never be returned, so you never dared to let him know

but this year was the year. the year he had been wishing for.

“keiji-kun !” you whispered to his ear. he turned around only to smile when he saw you bending over to his level. he assured you to your seat, which you tiptoes your way before dragging the chair silently.

you both thought to spend the new years this time in your favourite place, the library. normally, new years were spent in cafes on book stores, but the cafes has been pretty crowded recently and the local book stores were closed for the day. you both decided to then spend the night in the library, reading through books taken from the shelf of from home.

“are you cold?” akaashi asked politely, handing over his coat since you both were seated right underneath the air-conditioner. you thanked him then slipping it on, mindlessly inhaling his scent that was sprayed on the material. you both silently read your books, the sound of pages flipping through time to time. 

hours pass by as you both were still engrossed over your books. you took a short glance towards akaashi, the sight of him just making you fall for him all over again. his messy hair, his glasses slipping off the bridge of his nose and his small frown as he was reading through the words of his book. every time this happens, you just wish he’d knew how much you meant to him. how much you adore him. how much you love him.

your train of thoughts was suddenly cut off when you heard akaashi whispering you name. you turned to look at him, flinching slightly by how close his face was to yours.

“y/n-san, let me know when 12am strikes.” was all akaashi said before resuming back to his book. your heart was pounding, it could probably be heard from out. you pulled your phone out your pocket to check the time.

11:45pm, 31st december 2020.

you set your phone down on the table, screen facing down. you cleared your throat quietly before reading your book, but all you could think about is what’s going to happen when the clock ticks down to 1st of january 2021. despite your book open, your eyes was glued to your phone case, tempted to pick it up and check the time. after a while, you went back to your phone.

11:59pm, 31st december 2020.

just a few more seconds...just a few more-

12:00am, 1st janurary 2021

“keiji, it’s 12-”

“y/n-san, i’m in love with you.” you froze. you could feel the chill running down your spine. is this for real ? did he really meant that ? you clutched onto your phone, pulling it closer to your chest.

“i..uh..uhm” you kept stuttering, unable to find the right words. akaashi closed his books and set it on the table, before laying back onto his seat.

“i never really had the courage to let you know earlier. i guess you could say i was too afraid of what you might respond. but now i’m ready to accept any respond you give me. it does not matter if you won’t return your feelings, i just hope we can stay as friends.” he looked everywhere but you. you could tell that he was really anticipated for whether you’ll accept him or not. you tried to speak once more, but the words just won’t come out. your mouth was closed shut. all you could do..is show you really feel physically.

“i guess i’ll take the silent as a n-” you cupped his cheek, pulling him close to you before kissing him. you thank the gods the library was empty so you won’t have an audience observing. you kissed him passionately, your thumbs rubbing his cheeks. akaashi’s hands held your wrist, pushing himself closer to you to deepened the kiss.

after a while, you broke the kiss off, a strand of saliva stretching from both of your lips. akaashi smiled, settling back to his seat while you attempt to fan yourself from all the heat you were feeling after that kiss. your cheeks were slowly painting red.

“it’s uh..kinda getting a little hot up in here.” you tried to cover your red cheeks, only for akaashi to pull your hands down and holding it tight, laying a kiss on the back of your hands.

“happy new year, y/n.” he pecked a kiss on your lips once more, his eyes glistering from the lights on the ceiling.

he was now yours for you to claim dearly <3

—

𝕞𝕚𝕪𝕒 𝕠𝕤𝕒𝕞𝕦

osamu had a busy day in his work that he ended pretty late

he thought he could make it in time but just as he was about to leave, more people started to flood in

by midnight he was all done and was cleaning up

you decided to visit him to enjoy your new years in his shop.

he was very happy to see you after a tiring day at work uwu

the door bell rang as the door was swung open. osamu was busy wiping the counter just as he heard it which brought him into a sigh. it was a busy day and despite the door sign stating it’s closed, people still keep pushing in.

“i’m sorry, the shop is clos-” it took him a moment that the person who walked in wasn’t a customer but you, his love of his life. osamu’s tired face soon lit up just as he watches you walk closer to him, holding a paper bag in one of your hands.

“pretty busy night considering it’s the new years, huh?” you asked, setting the bag on the counter. you gave your boyfriend a peck on the cheek before settling down on one of the seats beside you. osamu leaned by the edge of the counter as he watches you look around the store. osamu decided to take a small peek in the bag, noticing there’s two bento boxes inside.

“what are these for?” he asked, taking the seat next to yours. you pull the bag closer to you, taking out the bento boxes and opening them, a strong aroma emitting just as the lid was opened. osamu was already salvating over the sight of the food your brought over, his hands fumbling with his chopsticks. 

“dig in.” your words all it takes for osamu to shove chunks of rice into his mouth. he laid back on his seat, huffing out to cool the hot steaming rice he was chewing on. you giggled just watching him chow down on the food you prepared at home, knowing he was working day and night and barely had breaks in between. you took a bite from your own bento, savouring the teriyaki chicken you deep fried.

“i guess this is how we’ll be spending our new years.” you teased, covering your mouth to avoid food spitting out. osamu only looked at you for a split second before munching down of his food, taking sips of water to push his chewed up food down his throat so he can shove in more. you smiled, playing with his hair at the back of his head. you both silently ate your food, having small talks here and there about new recipes osamu is trying out for his shop. all shops outside were closed and lights were out, but osamu’s was still lit up, with just the two of you inside eating.

“hey, teach me how to make onigiris ! i wanna try some !” you pleaded excitedly, scooting a little closer to him. osamu sighed as he began to rub his forehead.

“babe, not today. i just made a crap ton of onigiris i feel sick of it. let me enjoy my food.”

[mediocre-writerr]

aftertaste [the wilds girls]

the wilds girls x reader

requested #1: Obviously I don’t mean right away because you just wrote it, but would you consider doing a part 2 to the x reader with all the girls?

requested #2: Would you be willing to write one for all the wild girls x reader like the other one you did when the reader ate a lot of muscles too like Toni so they’re trying to figure out who to give the meds to? I love your work

*not my gif*

“Mussels anyone?” Dot asked as we were about to have our picnic in the corridor.

The quarantine on all of us girls had been lifted. We’re still trying to plan our great escape, but we’re just happy to be able to be around one another.

“Oh God no. After what happened last time?” Toni asked.

You scrunched up your face in disgust, “Oh yeah no thanks. I think I’ll pass.”

“Ah the Mussel Catastrophe of 2020.” Fatin said and all of you shuddered at the harsh memory.

Rachel had just come back with a boatload of mussels and you were all in for it. You’ve always loved some good seafood, mussels being your favorite so you went all out.

“I don’t know whose devouring these things faster Toni or Y/N.” Rachel pointed out and you could see piles of mussels already empty between you and Toni.

“Well when you think of it as a nice wet-“ Toni’s about to go on when Shelby stops her, placing her hands over your ears.

Shelby smacked Toni’s arm lightly, “Stop! You’re gonna corrupt her even more!”

You give Toni a side-glance and she stifles a laugh. Once Shelby released your hands from off your ears, you and Nora yelled, “PUSSY!!”

Shelby placed her head in her hands, shaking them like a disappointed mom. You, Toni, and Nora all give each other high-fives, smiling at each other widely.

“Too late for that.” Leah mumbles in between slurps of her mussels.

As the rest of the day flew away, you could feel an unsettling feeling in your stomach.

A constant pain. Needles pierced through your stomach. Everyone, but Shelby started to look pale. A cool sweat settling over your entire body. Your stomach started doing flips in the body.

“Is anyone feeling a little-“ Fatin started, but her sentence couldn’t finish because of the vile that came up her throat.

And as if the world had a strange weird vendetta against all of you, a chorus of gags and throw up came spewing out of all of your mouths.

You couldn’t help but feel everything start to get hotter and hotter. The whole island feeling like it’s spinning on its axis, faster and faster and faster. Every time you thought the vile was done, it started back up again harsher than the last.

Toni didn’t look in the best shape either. She wasn’t too far away from you, so you decided to crawl towards her. Your muscles falling weak, so it was more of an army crawl than anything else.

“Are you...you okay?” Toni asked and you shook your head.

“I feel like I just drank expired milk.” you coughed out, falling limp next to her.

“Well we kinda did.” she fell onto the ground lying next to you. Both of you curled onto your sides, holding your stomach in pain.

Fatin and Martha ran over to the both of you. Her sickness seemed like it was fading away. The only people who still seemed super affected it by it were you and Toni. The two girls had water in their hands.

Fatin pulled you onto her lap, “It’s gonna be alright Y/N. I know it hurts, I know.”

She held the bottle to your lips, trying to keep you as hydrated as possible. The water felt nice against your lips and down your throat. Until it didnt...falling right back onto the sand along with a bunch of other vile.

“Fatin I don’t feel good. I don’t like throwing up.” you whined, tears pooling in your eyes.

She ran her fingers threw her hair, “I know. I know. It’s okay. Dot and Leah are gonna be back with medicine.”

Again seemingly like the world is against all of you, Dot and Leah come rushing back, “So we have a problem we only have one pill.”

Leah looked a bit guilty, but your vision was fuzzy so you didn’t know if that was actually what you were seeing.

“Question is, who needs it more?” Leah asked and both you and Toni pointed at each other.

“No. It’s Toni’s...look at her. She’s practically sweating her ass off.” you say, your breathing ragged.

“Damn it Y/N! Take the pill. You’re younger, you have this whole life ahead of you. I don’t matter!” she let out, her voice tired and heavy.

You shook your head, grabbing her hand, “You matter to me and all of the girls here. And you’re right, I’m younger, I’ll be fine.”

The girl shook her head and you squeezed her hand softly, “Stop being so stubborn, you’re a literal ass. Just take the pill.” she laughed, before falling limp into Martha’s arms.

Leah handed Toni the pill, but she was still being her stubborn self. So Shelby did what she did best, pushing her onto the ground and force feeding it to her.

Well...that was a load of sexual tension that I’ve only seen on movie screens.

“I’m gonna take a nap.” you mumbled, curled up into a ball in Fatin’s lap.

Fatin shook you softly, “No, no. Finish this first.” she guided the water back up to your lips as you sipped on it. Practically chugging it down.

“Can I nap now?” you mumbled, extremely tired from the sickness you just fell through.

“Of course.” she whispered and you felt your whole body start to breathe evenly.

Toni gestured for Fatin to bring her closer to her, “Let me help her.”

She laid down next to you, wrapping her arm around your waist. Toni placed her head on your shoulder as you slept peacefully on the soft sand.

“Thank you.” Toni mumbled, “You matter to me too.”

“That’s when I knew that Toni was just a porcupine. A hard exterior, but soft on the inside.” Shelby said, placing a kiss to her temple.

You pretended to gag at them kissing, “Ew can you no kiss in front of me? I’m trying to eat.”

Shelby took a fry from her chicken tenders before throwing it at you. You moved your head, catching the fry in your mouth successfully.

“HA! Nice try!” you exclaimed, mocking the girl.

Leah slapped the back of your head, “Knock it off.” she joked, but her eyes were serious like a mom’s gaze.

“And for one I am not a porcupine. I will not hesitate to throw piss at all of you.”

A chorus of “mhm’s” and “okay sure’s” rang throughout the corridor. Toni sent all of you a death glare.

You raised your hands in false fear, “Wow I’m so scared.” you said sarcastically.

“You should be.” she said, squinting her eyes to look at you.

And all of a sudden a thick liquid hit your cheek. It plopped onto your lap in satisfaction. You picked up the fry and plopped it into your mouth.

“Shelby! Toni’s being mean to me!” you exclaimed, mocking a little kid’s voice.

“She started it!” Toni fired back using the same voice.

Shelby shook her head, looking at Dot, “Dot care to help out with these rascals?”

“Why are you looking at me for? I’m the cool aunt!” Dot exclaimed, sipping at her second milkshake.

“The two of you shut up before I turn this car around!!” Fatin yelled.

You and Toni looked at each other before shrinking softly.

“Done and done.” Fatin said, flipping her hair behind her shoulder.

[babbushka]

Somethin’ Brewin’

Pale x Reader (Blue Moon ‘Verse)

2.5k; NSFW (uniform kink, PIV, fingering, spanking, derogatory names, rough sex, begging, finger-sucking)

Kinktober 2020 Masterlist || Available on AO3

                                                  ----------------------

It’s late, real late. The kind of late where there ain’t even any taxis speedin’ past. An empty diner late at night sure was somethin’, wasn’t it? Sunday nights weren’t too busy, not when everyone had to get up early and head out to their 9-to-5s the next morning. So there you were, all by your lonesome, a couple dimes in the jukebox to keep you company.

Rain slicks up the pavement of the driveway outside, and through the windows you can see the reflection of all the neon out there in the cold and wet. In many ways, you love the diner like this; some soft jazz playing on that jukebox that’s gotta be older than you are, no one to disturb your thoughts as you rinse the last of the dishes and put them in the sinks for the third shift bus-boys.

The bus-boys have all gone, and so has the cook. The diner only serves coffee and whatever you’re willin’ to whip up, when it gets this late. It don’t matter, not one bit, ain’t nobody around to want you to whip anything up anyway.

Oh well, you think as you wipe down the milkshake bar, soon that little hand will hit one and then you’ll get to go home.

“Shit.” You tsk the roof of your mouth, you forgot your damn umbrella.

Fish ain’t here to let you take his this time, he went home an hour ago when it was dry. Maybe you’ll call for a ride, you mull the thought over. You’ve got the pocket cash for it, could just pull a bill or two from the tip jar and call it an evening, but the thought annoys you. That tip jar money’s been goin’ right into a special box that you’ve been working on, hopin’ to surprise your man for somethin’ nice for the holidays.

A bell at the front door dings, and any thoughts about loneliness in an empty diner are cast right outta your head, because as if he was summoned by your very thought, standin’ in front of you is your very own Pale.

Poor guy looks angry, but then again he always does. First thing in the morning after a long night of dead-to-the-world sleep and he looks angry, that was your Pale. He’s got a good reason to be annoyed tonight, just on account of the rain and all, his big leather jacket protected him from most of it, the rest he shakes off right at the door. He hangs up the jacket and reveals one of those silk shirts he loves to wear, gold chain glinting in the soft neon light.

“Wasn’t thinkin’ I’d be seein’ you tonight.” You greet him warmly, setting down the last of the thick glass cups that you’ve been rinsing out.

“Oh yeah? Why’s that?” He frowns, makes his way over to you where you’re waiting for him with your eyes closed and lips pursed.

You sigh against his mouth when his lips meet yours in a deep kiss, Pale leaning and reaching over the counter to grab at you. His hands don’t ever keep to themselves, and you grin against the corner of his mouth when he gives your ass a firm squeeze.

“Past couple of Sundays you’ve been real busy, that’s all.” You give him a casual shrug. You’re thrilled that he’s here, thrilled that your shift is almost over and that he’s come to pick you up, come to spend a little time with you before you go back to his place and spend the whole night together.

You don’t often spend nights together, just with how hard he works.  

“I’m never too busy for you sweetheart you know that – why don’t you go pour me a cup of somethin’ hot, hm?” Pale scrubs the hair out of his face, shakes it back a little so it falls nice and even. It’s wet, but that’s no issue, you like how he looks like this, and the diner is warm enough so he won’t go catching any colds.

“You’re in luck, I’ve got just enough coffee left in this pot for one VSOP.” You give a glance to the coffee pot on the warmer that has been pitifully neglected, save for a swirl every now and again.

Pale nods, and you don’t think you’ll ever stop being smug about that, about converting him to being a coffee drinker. He used to say it sours his stomach, but that’s just because he’s never had a good cup, he never had any of yours. Now he can’t get enough of the shit, and you take that as a win.

Bending over to reach for his favorite mug – you keep it someplace special so that none of the other waitresses send it out to customers during the day – you don’t even think about the fact that your skirt must be ridin’ up until you hear Pale’s very measured and even voice ask, “Hey sweetheart?”

You stand upright and look over your shoulder, that mug of his in hand and a sly smile creeping across your face.

“Yeah Pale?” You bat your lashes at him, acting oh so innocent – even though you’re anything but.

“Do that again.” His eyes have darkened, that cigarette of his clenched between his teeth, the red tip glowing as he takes a forceful drag.

Instead of bending over, you simply hike your skirt up, giving him exactly what he wants. You’re wearing underwear, but it’s the kind he likes, the soft cotton kind that rips easily, that hugs your hips and ass nicely. It’s white, and you just know Pale is already thinking about how soaked that fabric is gonna get, because he’s pouncin’ out of his seat in an instant.

“Like what you see?” You laugh brightly, playfully, dropping your skirt and turning to face him as he pushes his way through the little swinging door of the milkshake bar, is crowdin’ you up against the counter.

“Damn right I do – hold on.” Pale grunts, flicks his ash and yanks open his belt buckle.

You lick your lips while you watch him, casting a cursory glance to the rest of the diner. Anyone could come in, anyone could walk right in and you’d have nowhere to go or hide. The thought thrills you, especially as Pale manhandles you and turns you around, bends you over the counter. He keeps a hold of your wrists, bound behind your back, as he kicks your feet open.

“I love this fuckin’ uniform.” Pale licks his teeth, the hand that ain’t holdin’ your wrists shoves between your legs, rubs at the folds of your pussy and coaxes all kinds of wetness out of you, making you breathe hard from the pleasure that friction brings, “Don’t go workin’ nowhere else – or if you do, steal one of these and bring it back home to me whydontcha.”

“It’s the uniform that does it for you, hm?” You tease him, wriggling your ass against his hand as he slips a couple fingers under your panties and into your pussy, scissoring roughly just to get you stretched enough to take the tip of him. You moan out loud, “Ohhhhh, is that it? You like me in this short skirt?”

“The little hat,” Pale corrects you, and something about that catches you off guard and makes you push back against his hand, his hips, and he groans, “Fuck you’re sexy.”

“How do you want me, sir?” You gasp, “Well done…or over easy?”

That seems to be enough for him, because he pulls his hand out of your underwear and spanks you hard, making you yelp. It stings in the best way, and you can’t help but clench around nothing, wanting to be filled.

Drool pools out of your mouth and drips onto the counter when you get your wish, when Pale shoves down your underwear and you feel the head of his cock push its way roughly into your cunt, using your own slick and some of his spit to lube the way. Your legs spread even wider for him, as wide as the panties around your thighs will let you.

“Atta girl, there it is, right there. All this, this wet for me?” Pale grunts, one hand holding your wrists steady and the other now moving to pin your hip in place as he wastes no time thrusting.

“Shit, yes, Pale – your cock’s so big!” You moan, loud and high because there ain’t nobody around to hear you, no one’s coming, you can be loud loud loud as he thrusts his big dick into your wet cunt.

Stuff on the counter clamors and rattles as he speeds his pace up, not in the mood for anything gentle tonight. You loved it, loved what he gave you and took it eagerly. Pale hadn’t fucked you since last night, and you were starting to miss the feeling of his thick cock rammed up inside you.

“Been dreamin’ about this pussy all day, you know that? Couldn’t fuckin’ wait to get home only to find the place empty, figured you’d be here and damn I’m glad I was right, damn this pussy’s good.” Pale smokes while he fucks you, cigarette clenched between his teeth as you clench around his cock.

“Where – oh! – where the hell else am I gonna go this late?” You gasp and bite your lip, eyes struggling to stay open, the world shaking around you. If you weren’t bent over and pressed against the counter, your tits would probably be sore from how much they’d bounce.

“Off to one of your other boyfriends maybe, I don’t know I ain’t your keeper or nothin’.” Pale pretends he doesn’t give a fuck but you manage to smack his hand even pinned down like you are.

“Shut up with that shit, I’m your girl Pale, always your girl.” You huff out, before shifting your weight so you can meet every one of Pale’s thrusts, your pussy tight and hot around that aching pleasure, “Does this feel like anybody’s fucked me but you?”

“Say it again.” Pale’s quick to say, ignoring your question, and if your body weren’t on fire you’d roll your eyes, because he only riled you up enough so that he’d hear you say his favorite thing in the world,

“I-I’m yours. Your whore, your needy whore, oh fuck, harder Pale please, please!” You beg, beg because it’s all you can manage, his balls slapping your ass fast fast fast, your pussy drooling and dripping onto your panties, soaking into the fabric as his cock spears in and out of you, rough and dirty as he smokes his cigarette.

“I was just teasin’ you know, you’re good to me, my good girl. I like when you make that face you make at me, gorgeous.” Pale sounds like he’s smiling, even as he’s breathing hard, as he’s grunting and groaning and squeezing your hip, your wrists. You shoot a dirty look over his face and Pale thrusts sharply into you from it, “Yeah that’s it, be mad at me baby.”

“You’re – ah, right there right there – you’re awful to me, so mean, god you feel so good!” Your voice climbs higher and higher until you’re gasping loud, body jerking as Pale brushes against your gspot, the head of his cock knocking up against your cervix on every thrust.

“Keep your hat on sweetheart.” Pale grunts and groans, pulls his hand off your hip to smack at your ass again, another hit right on the flesh of your thigh, before that hand of his comes forward to stick his fingers into your mouth. You immediately suck on them, kissing and licking and biting them, hollowing your cheeks around them as he fucks you, “Big boss could come walkin’ in any minute and then you’d be in some real trouble, wouldn’t you? Real big trouble, gettin’ dicked down like this right out in the open.”

“Don’t care,” You moan around his fingers, they’re so thick, so wide, he can barely fit three of them against your tongue.

“’Course you don’t, slut.” Pale scoffs, and you chuckle warm in your chest, because you really are – but only for him. “You close?”

“Yes – yesyesyes, please, just a little more, touch me please.” Your voice is muffled against his hand, his fingers, but he can hear you just fine. Pale’s jeans chafe against your ass, your knees shake and body tenses, the pit of fire in your stomach rolling through your body. Your nipples are stiff, so stiff against your bra and the friction there makes your cunt clench, tears starting to well up in your eyes, if you don’t come soon you’ll be in pain from how good it all is.  

“Only because you ask so pretty.” He groans, coating his fingers with your spit for a moment or two longer, before lowering them to quickly rub harsh circles on your clit while he fucks you to completion.

“Oh!” Your knees turn in and your body goes limp with pleasure as your nerves tingle and sing up and down your spine, soaking his cock with your come.

He relishes the feeling and soon after you feel the hot splash of his come filling you up, pumping into you. Pale always did have such a big load, you’re almost disappointed that you won’t get to keep it safe for him all day – that dirty secret leaking out of your pussy while you served coffee was one of your favorite thrills.

This was good though, just this, just Pale, the two of you in the empty and quiet diner. Neon spots dance in front of your eyes, as Pale slows to a lazy languid pace, milking your orgasms for all they’re worth.

“Mmmm, thank you.” You sigh dreamily, pleasure like pepsi-cola bubbling and fizzing your brain, your nerve endings when his hips finally come to a stop.

“Don’t go thankin’ me for nothin’, we’re only getting started.” Pale stubs his cigarette out in one of the little ashtrays on the counter, and eases his cock out of you. You stretch and pop your joints, pulling your panties up and feeling thoroughly used in the best way, especially when he pinches your chin and kisses you with, “Now howsabout that coffee?”

“’Fraid we’re all out.” You lie, seeing that the clock struck one, your shift officially over.

Pale grins, kisses you once more and takes your hand, guiding you from out of the milkshake bar on wobbly legs.

“You’ll just have to come home with me then pretty girl,” Pale grabs that leather jacket of his and slings it around your shoulders when you make it to the front door, “We’ll get somethin’ brewin’ real quick.”

And if the third shift girls notice anything funny about you when you pass them in the parking lot, well, you’ve got the whole day off tomorrow to avoid their questions, spendin’ it with your man, your VSOP, instead.

[theladyofdeath]

The Joker {Nessian}

31 Days of Halloween: Day 17.

All installments co-written with @snelbz​

Based on a prompt sent in by anon : “Well, one of us has to change and it’s not going to be me.”

Warning: language, alcohol.

Autumn/Halloween 2020 {Collection}

Nesta looked in the mirror at her ripped fishnets, her shorts, her shirt that read Daddy’s Little Monster, and her red and blue pig tails. At first, she always thought that Harley Quinn was overly done on Halloween, but this year, she was feeling sexy in her costume. 

Her sisters would be there soon to pick her up, and although Nesta didn’t typically do the whole Halloween party thing, she was grateful for the break this year. 

Her work schedule had been grueling, every day leaving her exhausted, and she was grateful to finally have a day off. 

A night to drink, when she didn’t have to be up early the next day.

After one final look in the mirror, Nesta made sure her small, crossbody purse was appropriately packed for the night, with her mints, her lipstick, cash, ID, and one condom….just in case. After tossing her apartment keys inside of the bag, too, she was waiting, patiently, for the knock on the door to come. 

And when it did, Nesta was completely thrown off guard, because when she opened the door, she was met with the Joker. 

Cassian dressed as the Joker, to be more specific.

Nesta said nothing when she threw open the door and found Cassian’s shaggy hair dyed green, and his red suit, and yellow vest. His face was painted, and his grin was rimmed in red face paint.

Nesta blinked. “Where the hell are my sisters?”

“At the club,” he said, shrugging. “I told them I’d pick you up since your apartment is on the way.”

Nesta’s mouth opened, but was quickly snapped shut, before it opened, once again. “You have to change.”

He arched an eyebrow. “What?”

“You have to change,” he said, again, gesturing to her costume. “I’m Harley Quinn. You have to change.”

He chuckled. “And why is that?” 

She gestured again at her costume, and when he shrugged, she said, exasperated, “We’re a couples costume, and we’re not a couple! You have to change.”

Cassian snorted. “I’m not changing.”

“Well, one of us has to change and it’s not going to be me,” Nesta said, crossing her arms.

Cassian sighed. “Well, considering we’re at your house, and you insist that one of us must change, it has to be you.” 

Nesta’s lips formed a straight line. “I’m not changing, Cassian.”

“Well, neither am I,” he said, shrugging. “Now, we can go to this party, or you can stay here all alone, pissed off that we match. So. You ready?” 

Nesta scoffed. “You really know how to talk to a lady, you know.”

“Oh, I know,” Cassian grinned. “Come on. Everyone’s waiting. The party has started. Let’s go.”

Nesta hesitated. “No.”

Cassian looked at her for a moment before slowly shaking his head. “You’re so fucking stubborn.”

Nesta was taken aback, offended. “What?”

“You’re stubborn,” he repeated. “You’re stubborn, and it gets in the way of you having a good time.”

“I am not stubborn,” Nesta fought.

Cassian rolled his eyes. “You’re literally the most stubborn person that I know.”

“You’re so full of shit!” Nesta said, her offense growing. 

Cassian laughed as his head fell back, his hands shoved into his pockets. “Just come to the party, Nesta. I promise to keep my distance from you, if that’s what you wish. No one will even know that we’re together.”

“We’re not together,” she said, deadpan. 

Cassian blew out a breath. “Just come on, will ya? The truck is on, the heat is on, your sisters are waiting-”

“Cassian-.”

“Please?” he begged, and when she said nothing more, he took that as a good sign. “If you don’t show up, Elain will-.”

“Alright, alright,” Nesta sighed. “Back up.” 

Cassian took a step back and Nesta stepped into the hall, locking the door behind her. Without a word, she followed Cassian down the flight of stairs and to his truck, where she helped herself inside.

The ride was quiet, aside from the soft music playing in the background. It was so low that there were moments it got lost in the sound of the heater, blowing out toasty air.

Nesta picked up on the tension just a few minutes before they arrived, and once she did, she wasn’t sure how she had missed it. In the few glances she snuck at him, she could see how tight his grip on the wheel was, how tightly his jaw was clenched. His teeth must have been singing as they locked together.

But the most telling sign, the way she knew something was off, was the way he refused to look at her.

She wasn’t inclined to ask what it was.

When they arrived at the club, the line was around the building and Nesta nearly groaned, until she remembered who her younger sister was. Elain had bought VIP tickets the day they’d gone on sale, allowing them to bypass the line and enter exclusive areas that Rita only allowed a select few.

Hopping out of the truck, Nesta didn’t bother to wait for Cassian as she made her way towards the front of the line, popping a pink wad of chewing gum into her mouth. She’d wanted to go all out with the baseball bat, but knew it would get lost somewhere halfway through the night. Better to save her money for booze.

She retrieved the lanyard attached to the VIP pass from her clutch and held it up to the bouncer. Wordlessly, he let her through.

Nesta didn’t wait to see if Cassian was behind her. 

Maybe she should have, or maybe she should have at least thanked him for the ride that saved her from public transportation, but she didn’t. Even as the thought crossed her mind, her feet just kept moving into the club. 

She spotted her sisters and their boyfriends, along with Mor and Amren and their dates, in a booth along the far wall, close to the bar. They all cheered as Nesta approached.

“Where’s Cass?” Elain asked, beaming, after complimenting her sister’s costume. 

“Yeah, thanks for sending the ride, by the way,” Nesta muttered. “I hate the bus and I nearly almost took it anyway. Why’d you send him, anyway? Didn’t he have better things to do? Like, I don’t know, pick up his girlfriend?” 

Elain’s smile faltered. “You don’t know?”

Nesta arched a brow. “I don’t know, what?”

“They broke up,” Feyre said, shrugging. “A couple days ago, I’m surprised that you hadn't heard. Or, at least, saw it on Facebook.” 

“I’m taking a break from Facebook, it just pisses me off,” Nesta mumbled. 

She stared down at her hands, which were folded on the table. Cassian was single for the first time in years.

No wonder he had been so tense in the car.

The man himself appeared, a crooked grin that matched the gruesome one painted on his face, sliding into the booth, next to Rhys. Nesta looked at him for the first time, really looked at him, beneath the costume.

Those hazel eyes that she knew all too well, they were...hollow and empty. And she didn’t like it.

“Nice of you two to finally join us,” Amren said, shooting them both an impatient glare.

Nesta just raised an eyebrow at her friend, but Cassian said, “My apologies, ma’am. First round is on me.”

No one was arguing with that.

Drinks were ordered and as Nesta sipped on a tropical beverage, she kept glancing at the disheveled Joker across the booth. 

“Come on, Rhys, let’s dance!” Rhysand was dragged onto the dance floor, leaving Nesta and Cassian alone as the other couples followed, enjoying their time together.

Nesta cleared her throat, but Cassian continued to stare at his half-full glass of whiskey. 

She cleared her throat again.

Cassian’s eyes shot up and met hers. He blinked a few times as if he had completely forgotten she was there. “Sorry, what?”

Nesta hesitated. She really hadn’t thought of what to say, only that she hated seeing him so miserable. “Your costume looks good,” she said, deciding small talk was safe. “I’m glad you went with this version of the Joker.”

“I thought I needed to change.” His words were meant to bite, she could tell. But they didn’t. They were empty.

She didn’t like that. 

She’d never liked Cassian’s girlfriend. She was a haughty bitch, who constantly judged people and-.

Nesta stopped her thoughts before she let them follow that particular rabbit hole. But she had to admit she wasn’t upset at the news that Cassian wasn’t with her anymore.

Cassian definitely seemed upset, though. 

“I changed my mind,” she said, at last. “Who’s Harley Quinn without the Joker?” 

Cassian chuckled, even though the light didn’t reach his eyes. “You’re known to say that Harley is much better without the Joker.”

She had walked right into that one. But, for the sake of making him feel better, she’d push her personal beliefs of DC villains aside. 

“Just because you dressed up like Joaquin Phoenix instead of Heath Ledger, who was clearly the best Joker to date, doesn’t mean that I think your effort is a total waste,” Nesta went on.

He rolled his eyes, the first thing she’d seen that was anything similar to his normal self. “Please. Ledger’s interpretation may have been iconic, but it only blew up as big as it did because of his untimely death right after,” he said, bringing the glass to his lips and taking a drink. “But you’re not ready to talk about that.”

“It was a tragedy that added to the element of chaos that were his final years,” she defended, sipping down the rest of her drink.

Cassian raised a hand, looking over his shoulder at the bartender, who had two new drinks heading their way shortly after. They discussed the aesthetic differences in the different adaptations of characters, from the Joker and Harley, to Batman and even over to Marvel, getting into a heated debate over who was the superior Spiderman.

Cassian narrowed his eyes at Nesta, who had somehow ended up next to him in the booth - or did he end up next to her? - and said, a slight slur to his words, “Look, just admit it, you like Heath Ledger better because he’s prettier.”

Nesta snorted, something she thought was decidedly unladylike, but she didn’t care. “I mean, yeah, that’s obvious, but that’s not the only reason. It is the reason you should have been him though.”

“Because I’m pretty?” Cassian asked, with a crooked grin.

“I walked right into that one,” Nesta mumbled, downing her drink before setting it down on the table with a clunk. 

“So you do think I’m pretty,” Cassian said, his grin remaining. 

“Everyone thinks you’re pretty,” Nesta argued, snatching a full glass and not hesitating to take a drink. 

Cassian’s grin widened, and with the Joker makeup, Nesta was caught between thinking it was cute or terrifying. “Even you?”

Nesta didn’t answer. Her lips pressed together in a straight line. “Let’s dance, Nazari.”

She was already up on her feet when Cassian stared at her, dumbfounded. “What?”

She shrugged. “Let’s dance.” 

Cassian looked at her for a moment before saying, “I’m not really in the mood to dance, Nesta.”

“Why?” she asked. “Because you were dumped?”

Cassian’s shoulders tensed. “You don’t know what you’re talking about.”

Nesta shook her head, rubbing her temples. “It’s Halloween, Cass. You deserve to have a good night, and I’m going to make sure you have a good night.” 

Cassian took a deep breath as he looked up at Nesta, through his dark lashes. “Why do you care so much?”

Nesta wanted to grab him by the shoulders and shake him. “We’re friends, right?”

Cassian snorted. “We are?”

Nesta rolled her eyes. “Come on, Cass. Let’s dance.” 

Once again, Cassian stared at her for a long moment. “If I dance with you, will you admit that Joaquin is a better Joker?” 

Nesta slowly shook her head as she crossed her arms. “Never.”

Cassian’s eyes narrowed. “Can we at least agree that Jared Leto was the worst?”

Nesta grinned. “Oh, absolutely.”

“I’ll take it.” Cassian stood, and took Nesta’s hand. She led him onto the dance floor and wasted no time trying to take his mind off his breakup.

They had come together, after all. Even though they weren’t a couple.

Not yet, anyways.

[spine-buster]

The President Wears Prada (William Nylander) | Chapter 26

A/N: I don’t usually say stuff like this but y’all can thank me later for the ending.

TW: mentions of covid-19

March 10th, 2020

Aberdeen Bloom was about to show Camden around Scotiabank Arena.

“Don’t touch anything that’s not yours to touch, okay?” she warned him as they were just outside the doors to the arena.  She looked down at him to make sure everything looked okay – that his hair was nicely brushed, that his shirt wasn’t wrinkled, that his pants weren’t drooping, that his shoes were tied – before she bent down.  “I mean it.  We’re taking extra cleaning protocols because of this coronavirus thing and you don’t want to make extra work for the cleaning staff, right?”

“Right,” he nodded his head.  “Don’t worry, Aberdeen.”

“And no touching the sticks.  The guys are super-finicky about their sticks.”

“No touching the sticks.”

“And no touching anything in their stalls, either.  A lot of them are superstitious so if one thing is off, they’ll know.”

“No touching the stalls.”

“And no touching the—”

“No touching!!!” he yelled, clearly getting the point.  “Can we go inside now?”

Aberdeen was nervous.  But Camden was a good kid.  She had confidence that he wouldn’t embarrass her.  “Yes, we can go in now,” she said, about to get back on her feet.  And then she remembered.  “But one last thing—”

“Aberdeeeeeeeeeeeen!”

“The most important thing,” she said over him.  “You cannot tell anyone William Nylander came to our house for Christmas and you cannot talk like you’ve met him before.”

Camden nodded his head.  “I knooooow.  William spending Christmas with us has to be a secret always and forever.  I get it.  Can we please go inside now so I can see everyone before mom and dad get here?”

Aberdeen smiled.  What a kid.  “Let’s go,” she said, standing up and putting her arm around his back as they walked into the arena together.  Aberdeen flashed her fob to open the door and led Camden towards the elevators, taking it up to her office.  Camden was looking around at everything – everything was big and shiny and very sports-y, and he knew that if he was good, Aberdeen would take him to the Raptor’s locker room too.

“Heeeeey,” Brendan smiled as he saw Aberdeen ushering Camden into the office, getting up from his seat.  He’d never seen Aberdeen look so proud as she did as they walked into the room.  “How you doin’, buddy?  Remember me?  The candy man from Christmas?”

Camden nodded his head.  “Hello Mr. Shanahan.  I remember you,” Camden held out his hand.  

Brendan chuckled as he shook his little 11-year-old hand.  “You’re just like your sister.  Very formal.  She wouldn’t call me Brendan for months.”

Camden looked up at her.  “Yeah, mom and dad make sure we always call people mister and misses.  If we didn’t and mom heard about it, she’d have a fit.  Same with dad.”

“My mom was the same way, you know.  I think it’s because they grew up in Belfast,” Brendan winked.

“Probably.”

“So what do you want to see, bud?” Brendan asked.  “I don’t think you want to see the offices, right?  But not a lot of the guys are here yet.”

Camden looked around at Brendan’s office.  He clearly had something on his mind, though he seemed a bit nervous to say it.  “Can I ask you a question?”

“Of course.”

Camden bit his lip slightly.  “My sister told me the guys get to eat here if they want to.  But where do they eat?”

Brendan had the most amused look on his face.  Aberdeen couldn’t help but chuckle from behind Camden too.  “You want to go see catering?”

“I guess so.”

Brendan shook his head.  He loved kids.  “Then we’re going to catering.”

***

Camden, Aberdeen, and Brendan went to catering.  Camden met the head chef and got to stir some onions and garlic frying in a pan as the base for the pasta sauce that night.  He even helped set the menu, deciding to go for grilled chicken for the guys.  He originally suggested fried, but the chef told him the guys needed to eat clean and that if they had friend chicken, John Tavares would get mad at everyone for eating it, because they would eat it.  

They saw Kyle, who brought them out into the empty arena, and brought them all the way down to ice level where Aberdeen was able to take some pictures of him on the empty ice, on the Leafs bench, and even in the penalty box.  Camden got a kick out of it all, and got less shy and more boisterous as the minutes passed and Brendan and Kyle allowed him to do funny things.  He was even able to see the Zamboni.  He was smart enough not to ask if the man tending to it was David Ayres.  

When they were back in the corridors of the arena, Kyle looked down at Camden who was practically skipping through the hallways.  “I heard your sister got you a pretty cool Raptors jersey for Christmas,” Kyle said.

“Yup!” Camden nodded his head.  “A Kyle Lowry one.  He’s the coolest.  I wore it on my first day of school back from Christmas break and all my friends thought it was soooo cool.”

“Do you want to go into their locker room?” Kyle smiled, already knowing the answer.  

Camden’s eyes lit up like the fourth of July.  “Can I?!  For real?!” he asked.

“For real,” Kyle nodded.  “Come on, let’s go.  Maybe we can get a picture of you in Kyle Lowry’s stall.”

Fireworks were practically shooting out of Camden’s eyes as they walked inside of the dressing room.  He looked at every stall and every player’s name written at the top.  The only thing he could keep saying was “This is so cool!” and “Oh my God!”  Aberdeen hung out at the perimeter of the room as she watched him, letting Camden get the full effect.  He kept looking back at her and smiling from ear to ear, clearly not believing anything was real.  Aberdeen would smile back and urge him to keep looking.

Suddenly, she heard a door open from behind her.  She turned around quickly to see who it was and make sure she wasn’t in the way, but realistically, there shouldn’t have been anyone else there besides them, so she was skeptical.  When she saw who it was, her heart dropped into the pit of her stomach.  “Oh, hello Miss Bloom!” Masai greeted her after he’d poked his head through the door.  He had a casual sports jacket on with a plain black polo shirt and a nice pair of pressed slacks.  “How are you?”

“I’m fine Mr. Ujiri.  How are you?”

“All good here.  What’s the occasion?” he asked, nodding his head towards Kyle, Brendan, and Camden.

“That’s my little brother Camden,” she said, only to see Masai’s smile grow.  “I think he feels like he’s won the lottery right now.”

“Camden?” he clarified the name in a low voice.  She nodded her head before watching him close the door and step into the locker room confidently.  “Hello Camden!” he beamed.

Camden whipped his head around.  When he saw that it was Masai Ujiri, his face dropped.  Brendan and Kyle smiled.  “Masai Ujiri?!” Camden yelled.

“That’s me!  Are you having fun?”

Camden didn’t know what to do.  He couldn’t formulate words, and he couldn’t move, and the step forward he took was mute when he froze in place because he didn’t think it was polite to hug Masai Ujiri, so he just sort of stood there in a weird stance with his jaw on the floor until he could formulate one simple word.  “Hi.”

Everybody laughed.  Masai made his way into the room.  “You’re a big Raptors fan?  Who’s your favourite?”

“K—K—Kyle Lowry,” Camden stuttered out.  

“Good choice,” Masai smiled.  “Do you want a picture in his stall?”

Camden could only nod enthusiastically.  He walked towards the stall, and Aberdeen knew it was her cue.  She took out her phone and began snapping pictures of him standing, sitting, pointing at Kyle’s name – everything.  Camden had the biggest smile ever on his face.  Then Masai posed with him too, and an even bigger smile appeared on his face.  It was all so cool.  And then—

“Hey!  Who’s that in my stall?”

A shiver went up Aberdeen’s spine.  From his spot in the stall, Camden’s face dropped again – if it was possible, even more this time than when Masai walked into the room.  She turned around to see the man himself, Kyle Lowry, walk into the room.  “What’s up, buddy?” Kyle asked, smiling from ear to ear.

“K—Ky—Ky—” Camden couldn’t get his name out.  “K—Kyle—”

“That’s me.  You having fun?” he asked.  Camden nodded.  “Have you ever been in here before?”

“N—No Mr. Lowry, I—I’ve just s—seen it on TV,” Camden stuttered out.  

“Who’s Mr. Lowry?  Call me Kyle,” he said as he walked towards him.  “You excited to be in here?” he asked.  Camden could only nod his head.  “You watch us at home?”

“I watch you at home with my dad all the time,” Camden said, which was true.  They’d watched almost all the games last season (until Camden’s bedtime, naturally), and he stayed up past his bedtime for all the playoff games.  This year, he and Mirza were continuing the tradition.  

“Do you have a jersey to wear while you watch them?”

“Aberdeen gave me a jersey for Christmas.”

Everyone laughed at his innocence.  It was only then that Aberdeen noticed a jersey draped over Kyle’s shoulder.  Even she was freaking out, because she knew how much this meant to Camden.  “So I guess you don’t want this one then?” Kyle asked, pulling the jersey off his shoulder.  He opened it up to reveal a vintage-style jersey, one with the original logo.  He took a Sharpie and asked Camden for his name and how to spell it before writing it on the jersey and signing it.  “You want a picture, buddy?” Kyle asked.  Camden could only nod.  He was too shocked.  Aberdeen was glad they were being so patient with him. 

They posed together with Kyle’s stall in the background, and then Masai joined in, and then Aberdeen got in, too.  Camden was rendered speechless.  When they were led out of the locker room, Kyle and Masai said goodbye before they disappeared into the elevator.  Kyle said a few parting words as well since he had to take an important phone call before the game.  Brendan left Aberdeen and Camden alone to go to his office, expecting Orla and Mirza anytime now.  It left Aberdeen and Camden alone, with Aberdeen knowing Camden was still star-struck by what just happened.

“Ab—Aberdeen,” Camden said finally, once the men were gone.  He was clutching onto the jersey so tight, like it would float away.  

“Are you alright, Cam?” she asked, bending down on her knee so she could look him in the eye.  

He shook his head.  “I w—wasn’t ready for that,” he said, his voice shaky.  “I didn’t—I didn’t look like a loser, did I?”

“What?  No way!” she exclaimed.  “Camden, you never look like a loser.”

“He was so cool Aberdeen!  I mean he’s Kyle Lowry!” he said as he began to cry.  

“C’mere,” she cooed, wrapping her arms around him tightly and pulling her brother in for a big hug.  “I know it was overwhelming, but that’s okay!  You just met your hero!  I bet if any of your other friends met their hero, they wouldn’t know what to do either,” she said, trying to get him to calm down.  

As Aberdeen continued to hug her brother, rubbing his back so he’d calm down a bit, she heard people making their way up the stairs, and soon, she saw William and Auston making their way up.  William noticed her first, looking her straight in the eye even though Auston was talking to him.  When Auston noticed him not responding, he looked and saw Aberdeen.  

“Hey,” William greeted them, looking at her skeptically.  “Everything okay?”

Aberdeen nodded her head against Camden’s shoulder.  “Camden just had a big moment,” she said, giving them both a look.  “He just met Masai Ujiri and Kyle Lowry.”

Both William’s and Auston’s eyes bulged out.  “Ooooooh, wow!” they cooed together.  “Dude, that’s so awesome!” Auston said, sounding excited, trying to make Camden as comfortable as possible as Aberdeen let go of the hug so Camden could face Auston and Willy.

“I’d be the same way, bud!  Don’t worry!” William said as he noticed the nervous and embarrassed look on Camden’s face as he wiped away whatever few tears fell.  He noticed the jersey hanging from Camden’s other hand.  “Is that it?”

“Yeah,” he nodded.

“Let’s see it,” Auston said gently.

Camden unfolded it gently, as if the autograph would rub off.  When the guys noticed that it was a vintage jersey, they commented on how cool it looked.  And when they finally saw the personalized autograph, they were all but screaming.  “I don’t even have one of these, bud!” Auston exclaimed.  “You’re sooooo lucky!”

“Yeah, me neither!” William joined in.  “You’ve gotta frame that or something.”

“I gotta show all my friends at school first,” he said.  The more Camden calmed down, the more he came to his senses.  He took a second and third look at the men in front of him – he of course noticed and knew William, but it was Auston who he finally realized was standing in front of him.  “Holy moly, you’re Auston Matthews!”

Auston giggled.  “Yes I am.”

“You…you’re the coolest!”

“Thanks, bud,” he said.  “Has your sister brought you into our locker room yet?”

Camden shook his head.  “Not yet.  There was nobody here yet so we went to catering.”

“Catering?!” William was shocked.  “You brought your brother to catering?!”

“I told him how you guys could eat before the game and he wanted to see!” Aberdeen tried to defend herself.  

William shook his head.  “Come on, Camden.  Let’s see who’s already here.”

With Auston leading the way and Camden in front of him, William looked back at Aberdeen behind him and winked at her.  “By the way Aberdeen, how do I look?” he asked.

She smiled.  “You look like if the song ‘Africa’ by Toto were a person.”

Auston threw his head back and cackled loudly like a seagull.  William shook his head.  Camden looked back at his sister.  “What’s Toto?  Isn’t that the dog from the Wizard of Oz?”

“Don’t worry about it, Cam,” she said.  

Camden was nervous as they approached the doors of the locker room, so he waited for his sister to be near him before he stepped through.  When he did, he was wide-eyed and amazed; he couldn’t believe he’d just been in the Raptor’s locker room and now he was in the Toronto Maple Leafs’ locker room, too.  Most of the guys were actually already in the room, but luckily they were not in various stages of undress yet.  Morgan was the first one to notice them – it was his first game back from injury, so his energy level was off the charts.  “Aberdeen!” he yelled her name, giant smile on his face.  His eyes moved to Camden.  “Who’s this?”

“This is Camden, my little brother,” she said, introducing him.  “Camden, that’s Morgan Rielly.  He’s one of our alternate captains and it’s his first game back tonight.”

“What’s up, Camden?” he asked, smiling gently.  

“Hello Mr. Rielly.”

“Camden just met Masai Ujiri and Kyle Lowry, so he’s a bit shocked at everything right now,” Aberdeen said, making a face at Morgan that Camden couldn’t see.  

Morgan got the hint.  “That’s the jersey then, huh?” he pointed to the jersey still in Camden’s hands.  Camden nodded.  “Isn’t Kyle just so cool?” Morgan asked.

A smile spread on Camden’s face.  “He’s my faaaaavourite,” he said.

“Me too.”

“Do I hear a Bloom brother is here?” Tyson’s voice boomed from the other end of the locker room.  Aberdeen watched him walk through the door with a big smile on his face.  “What’s up?!  You must be Camden!”

“Hello Mr. Barrie.”

“You excited for the game tonight?”

Camden nodded.  “It’s my first ever hockey game.”

“First ever?!  Okay, we gotta make it extra special then,” Tyson smiled.  “Where are you sitting?”

Camden looked up to Aberdeen, because he didn’t have a clue.  “Mom, dad, and Camden are sitting in row 20 at centre ice,” she said.  “If he’s good he’ll be back after the game too.  But only if he’s good.”

“Hey!  I’m always good!” he objected.

“I’m not sure about that.”

***

As Aberdeen sat with Brendan in the box, she noticed him checking his phone a lot more than usual.  It was especially peculiar because this was a game against Tampa Bay – a very good team and many saw this as a must-win for the Leafs, especially since they won their last game against Tampa Bay on her birthday.  And like with the game in Ottawa, when Siena was there, and on her birthday, when he scored that insane between-the-legs goal, William was just showing off.  He was playing great, and had scored a goal in the first period.  Aberdeen knew he was hamming it up for her and her family, knowing they were in attendance.  

When Auston scored in the third period to get the score to 2-1, Brendan was happy but it didn’t last long.  He began furiously typing away on his phone.  She wondered if there was a problem with one of his kids or with Catherine.  He usually wasn’t this distracted during games.

“Is everything okay, Brendan?” she asked once the final buzzer went.  The Leafs had won 2-1 and she thought he’d be much happier.

He pursed his lips together, shrugging his shoulders and shaking his head.  “Trying to keep up on the coronavirus,” he said.  The media had already been put at bay and weren’t allowed close to the players anymore.  She wondered if new restrictions were being implemented and the media wrote a pissy open letter demanding access again.  “It’s not looking good.  I mean, the entire country of Italy is in a fucking lockdown.  They can’t control this thing.”

Aberdeen heard that news yesterday.  It was a shock to her, mainly because she didn’t think it was possible an entire country could go into lockdown.  But the north was getting rattled by it, and it seemed like the only logical thing to do, however draconian it was.  She had a lot of Italian friends from high school whose family were still in Italy and were affected by it.  “What do you think will happen?” she asked.

“Don’t know,” he said.  “I mean…it’s getting serious.  Really serious.  And I’m not convinced it can be contained like we all hope it can be,” he said.  

“What do you think will happen with us?” she followed up.

“If…ah, I honestly don’t know, Aberdeen.  They could postpone games by a few days.  I mean, I think that’s the worst-case scenario right now – everything being delayed by a couple of weeks.”

Aberdeen bit her lip.  “Yeah…I guess that’s totally worst-case scenario.”

“Absolute worst-case scenario,” Brendan repeated.  “Do I think it will get that bad?  I don’t know.  I don’t think so.  But I have no clue about these things.”

“What…I mean, the directive has to come from the league, right?” she asked.

“Of course.  It always comes from the top down.  We’ll see what happens.  We can’t worry about hypotheticals.”

Aberdeen nodded.  He was right.  “So I guess I’ll see you on Wednesday when Nashville is in town?”

“You betcha.  Let me walk you down and say goodbye to your family.”

***

Aberdeen had barely taken her shoes off when she got into her condo before she felt her phone buzz in her hand.  

can i see u?

She couldn’t believe him.  But at the same time, she could.

You’re lucky you can.

i’ll be there in 5

She took the five minute opportunity to change out of her work clothes and take off her makeup.  When the calling buzz rang from her phone, she immediately let him in.  Within minutes, he was knocking at her door, and she was letting him in like she always did.  

“How’s your brother?” he asked as he took off his shoes.  

“He’s fine,” she smiled slightly, liking that William was asking about him.  Camden had returned to the Leafs locker room after the game (if the media found out, she knew they’d have a hissy fit since they weren’t even allowed back there, but Brendan didn’t care) and Auston gave him his game-worn jersey, which all the guys ended up signing.  By the end of the night, all of the excitement of the day and the game had caught up to him, and he was practically falling asleep standing up.  “He was tired by the end but I could tell it was the best day of his life.”

“He’s a cute kid,” William commented.  “You guys are alike, you know.”

“How?” Aberdeen was curious.

“You’re both…like, pure.  You both light up the room when you enter it,” he smiled.  The shy smile on her face was his favourite.  He approached her, not wanting to wait any longer.  “Is Kasha home?” he asked before he put his arm around her.  

“No.  She’s with Evan tonight,” Aberdeen said.

“Sleeping over?”

Aberdeen nodded, a smirk on her face.  “Aren’t you a lucky boy.”

William smiled.  “The luckiest boy in the world,” he mumbled, wrapping his other arm around her and pulling her against his body.  

“You always know the perfect opportunities to show up,” she said.  “If I didn’t know any better I’d say you’re in cahoots with her as to when to come over and get in my pants.”

William chuckled, leaning down. “In cahoots?” he mumbled against her lips.  “The only thing or person I’m in cahoots with these days is you, minskatt.”

“Not Rasmus?” she asked.

He grumbled at her before deciding to get her to be quiet by kissing her.  When his lips planted on hers, she let out a slight gasp before wrapping her own arms around his shoulders, kissing him fully and sticking her tongue down his throat in no time at all.  As they kissed in the middle of her kitchen, William slipped his hands underneath her shirt and up to her bra, feeling her breasts through the cotton fabric.  “Bedroom?” he asked.

Aberdeen nodded.  “Please.”

***

March 11th, 2020

Good afternoon.  In the past two weeks, the number of cases of COVID-19 outside China has increased 13-fold, and the number of affected countries has tripled.  There are now more than 118,000 cases in 114 countries, and 4,291 people have lost their lives.  Thousands more are fighting for their lives in hospitals.  In the days and weeks ahead, we expect to see the number of cases, the number of deaths, and the number of affected countries climb even higher.  WHO has been assessing this outbreak around the clock and we are deeply concerned both by the alarming levels of spread and severity, and by the alarming levels of inaction.

We have therefore made the assessment that COVID-19 can be characterized as a pandemic.

***

Aberdeen’s brows were furrowed as she and Kasha watched TV, the both of them feeling like they were in the twilight zone or something.  The basketball game was supposed to have started, but never did.  People were rushing off the court.  Nobody knew what was going on, and the announcers were just speaking in hypotheticals.  It was all very confusing – that is, until, the headline came:

Rudy Gobert tests positive for coronavirus.

The girls couldn’t keep their eyes off the TV screen.  Now the Utah Jazz and the Oklahoma City Thunder were being quarantined inside the arena and being tested.  Just the other day, Rudy Gobert was making light of the entire situation and touching all of the reporters’ microphones after his interview with them.  Now he had the virus.

“Oh my God,” Kasha muttered as she looked down at her phone.  

“What?  What’s going on?” Aberdeen asked.

“Tom Hanks just announced he has it,” she announced, looking up.  

The girls looked at each other, speechless.

***

“Did you hear the NBA has suspended their season?” Aberdeen asked as she lay in her bed, holding her phone along the pillow as she looked at William through the screen.  He was doing the same thing.  His disheveled hair and sleepy blue eyes would have made her swoon in any other situation, but right now, she wasn’t swooning.  

“Yeah,” he nodded.  He noticed she was wearing the hoodie that he left there by accident last night.  “It’s crazy.  I mean it’ll probably be for the next few days until they have everything under control, you know?”

“Yeah,” Aberdeen said, but she wasn’t so sure.  “What do you think the NHL will do?” she asked.

“No clue.  Maybe they’ll suspend the next few days of games too, just to make sure everything is under control too.  We’ll probably have to get tested.  I heard they stick something all the way up your nose,” William said.  There were a few moments of silence between them.  “Are you scared, minskatt?”

It was the first time somebody actually asked her that question – asked her if she was scared.  Everybody talked about it but nobody ever stopped to ask if she was actually scared.  She felt herself nodding her head.  “A little bit,” she admitted.

“Don’t be scared, minskatt.  I don’t want you to feel scared.  But I’m here if you want to talk about it.  You know that, right?”

She nodded her head.  “Are you scared, Willy?”

He nodded too.  “Yeah.  A little bit.”

***

March 12th, 2020

Aberdeen had an incredibly early morning.  She actually went into the office at 7:30 in the morning because Brendan requested she be there for some additional prep and to scribe the minutes of the meeting taking place with the NHL and the Board of Governors.  With a tired body but overactive mind, thinking about all the possibilities that could happen, her fingers moved a mile a minute across the keyboard as she sat with Brendan and Kyle.  Up until this point, everything in the league was carrying on as normal, despite the NBA postponing their season not even twelve hours prior.  She knew for a fact other teams around the league were still preparing to hold practices because those who were on the call said so and asked about it.  The Nashville Predators were already in for a morning skate, and the Leafs were going to have their practice right after.  

When the decision was made, and all that needed to be done was tell the players before the statement was drafted and released to the media, Brendan took a long, hard, exasperated sigh.  He rubbed at his temples and let his pen drop from his hand.  He leaned back in his chair before he looked at Aberdeen.  “All the guys are present and accounted for in the locker room.  We have to go and tell them.”

The thought of having to tell the team was daunting.  She knew it wasn’t her that was going to be delivering the bad news, but it would still be disheartening just being in the room and seeing their faces drop.  They’d probably have so many questions and Brendan and Kyle wouldn’t have any answers for them.  She looked at Kyle to see if he could offer her any solace but he was rubbing his eyes underneath his glasses.  “What do you think they’ll say?” she asked.

Brendan shook his head and shrugged his shoulders.  “Who knows.  But nobody will be happy.  I know that much.”

As they made their way towards the locker room, Kyle texted Sheldon to make sure all the guys and all the personnel were congregated in the locker room to hear the announcement.  With the Predators also being there, Aberdeen knew there’d be overlap.  So many of them knew each other so she wondered if they had already gone to see each other.

When they got into the locker room, everyone was waiting like kids in class.  Aberdeen locked eyes with William and moved off to the side as Brendan and Kyle stood at the front of the room.  They were told the news.

“For how long?”

“Even practices?  I mean this is just going to be for a few days, right?”

“Are they releasing a statement?”

“Did the league say anything about making up the games?”

“When are we going to start again?”

“Does that mean the season is being extended even further into the summer?  Doesn’t that delay next season?  What about the CBA?”

“What’s the PA have to say about this?”

“Is the PA making a statement too?”

“What do we do with our equipment?  Our stalls?”

We don’t know.

We don’t know.

We don’t know.  

“Listen, the only thing we do know for sure is this: it’s been classified as a pandemic now by the World Health Organization and it’s spreading quickly.  This thing can’t be contained.  With Gobert testing positive last night, it was only a matter of time before this thing affected us, too.  We share so many locker rooms with NBA players.  It might already even be in our league and we don’t know it,” Brendan said.

“Schools have already announced an extended March Break.  Nobody knows a lot right now but what we can tell you is that we’re going to listen to the public health officials and their advice,” Kyle said.  “We’re hockey players – we’re not epidemiologists.  If someone tells me to stop playing a full-contact sports to stop the spread of a highly infectious diseases even the world’s best epidemiologists still know very little about, I’m going to listen to them.”

“So what do we do now?” Morgan asked.

“Go home.  Until you’re given further directives from us, go home and stay home.”

***

"In light of ongoing developments resulting from the coronavirus, and after consulting with medical experts and convening a conference call of the Board of Governors, the National Hockey League is announcing today that it will pause the 2019-20 season beginning with tonight's games.”

"The NHL has been attempting to follow the mandates of health experts and local authorities, while preparing for any possible developments without taking premature or unnecessary measures. However, following last night's news that an NBA player has tested positive for coronavirus -- and given that our leagues share so many facilities and locker rooms and it now seems likely that some member of the NHL community would test positive at some point -- it is no longer appropriate to try to continue to play games at this time.

"We will continue to monitor all the appropriate medical advice, and we will encourage our players and other members of the NHL community to take all reasonable precautions -- including by self-quarantine, where appropriate. Our goal is to resume play as soon as it is appropriate and prudent, so that we will be able to complete the season and award the Stanley Cup. Until then, we thank NHL fans for your patience and hope you stay healthy."

***

When Aberdeen got home, the news had just been announced that Sophie Gregoire Trudeau, Justin’s wife, had it.  The anxiety Aberdeen felt only multiplied.  Kasha wasn’t home when she got home – she was at work, obviously – so it was just her alone with her thoughts, and it wasn’t going well.  Aberdeen prided herself on watching the news and keeping up to date with current events, but the doomscrolling she was doing on her Twitter and the CNN feed she turned on in the background wasn’t helping.

Then she heard the buzzer for her apartment.  That could only mean one thing.  

“Are you feeling okay, minskatt?” William asked the first second he saw her, which meant she was unable to ask him why he showed up at her place.

“I…I don’t know,” she admitted.  “I’m scared, Willy.”  Knowing it was still mid-day and that Kasha was at work, he took the opportunity to move closer to her and engulf her in a hug.  Her arms were pressed between their bodies as he hugged her tightly.  She took a moment to take in his scent and compose herself and try to snap out of all the doomscrolling she’d just done.  “What are you even doing here?”

“I needed to see if you were okay.  Plus I left my hoodie here the other night and—”

He was interrupted by her phone ringing loudly on the kitchen countertop.  They both looked down at it and saw Brendan’s name flash across the screen.  A pit formed in Aberdeen’s stomach.  She let it ring a few more times before reaching out to pick it up and answer it.  “Hello?”

“Did you have contact with anybody from Nashville today?” he asked, not bothering with formalities.  “Including staff.”

“Y—Yes,” she said.  She had seen and spoken with a bunch of the staff about the situation as everyone was packing up and going home.  She was ruminating how it would be more dramatic for them to fly home whereas the Leafs just had to drive.  “Why?”

She heard him take a long breath.  “We’re getting information about precautions and what you can do to minimize the spread and exposure, and…listen, Aberdeen, the government and every public health official is instituting a policy of a fourteen day quarantine period—”

“Quarantine?!  What do you mean quarantine?” she asked.

“—Immediately.”

“Immediately?!”

“It means no leaving your house.  At all.  For anything.  You…you can’t leave, Aberdeen.”

She couldn’t believe what she was hearing.  She didn’t know what to think, how to feel, anything.  She was void of emotion.  “Oh my God.”

“I know.  Believe me.  The entire country is going into lockdown.  This is more serious than I could have ever imagined.  I’ve gotta call the rest of the team to let them know.”

He hung up the phone.  She looked over to William.  She knew he’d heard Brendan through the phone.  And before she could even utter a word, his phone began ringing.  Brendan’s name flashed across his screen this time.  He looked her in the eye as he answered.  “Hello?..........Yeah.  Yeah I caught up with Filip Forsberg for a bit, some of the other Swedish guys too……….okay…okay…what do you mean quarantine?  Like stay at home?  But like, if I’m out—I—okay, go home immediately?  Yeah yeah, I’ll drop everything..........Fourteen days?...Uh, I guess so.  I mean I have no choice right?......Yeah I’ll be fine.  I’ll have groceries delivered like I always do……Yeah…Yeah…Okay.  Bye Brendan.”

They were both speechless.  

***

Aberdeen called Kasha.  Kasha was going to take the opportunity to stay at Evan’s place for fourteen days, and would be by after work to pack, during which Aberdeen would lock herself in her room.  Aberdeen didn’t know how Kasha would be able to hide a fourteen-day stint at Evan’s place from her dad.  But then again, Aberdeen was hiding William from everybody.  They both had secrets.

Once everything was arranged, she could finally look at William sitting on her couch.  She didn’t even know if he had clothes.  Underwear.  Anything.  She looked at him.  “Does this mean we’re living together for fourteen days?”

William couldn’t believe what was happening, but at the same time, he couldn’t help but smirk slightly.  “I think it does.”