#what the hell is going on in your empty brain right now mario

[duckapus]

Anyone else notice how Mario was the only major character at the Fairest Competition that wasn't actually shown getting reprogrammed by Mr. Puzzles after SMG3 went off-script? Like even Bowser gets a static eye closeup but not the main character of the series!? And then in the very next scene he explicitly asks how SMG3 will spend all the money he wished for if they're still stuck here? Like I know he technically means still stuck in the tower since that's where the dancing in money scene takes place but it's literally right after the reprogramming scene!

[thepenultimateword]

Static: Part Two

Part One

An electric shock like a clap of thunder jolted Villain into consciousness. Her ears popped as she shot upright, and a low whine sounded deep within her skull. Villain clasped her hands over her ears, trying to catch her breath as she waited for the fuzzy feeling in her head to fade.

You're fine. You're fine. A rogue chuckle escaped past her lips. Wow, that last shock had really shaken her. Was it a coincidence? Or did someone know she'd been talking? It was just another shock. You're fine.

Fzzzzzzzzzzz

Compared to the bolt from a few seconds ago, this regular, even buzzing was a comfort. Villain scanned the unfamiliar living room around her, ugly striped rug, square-shaped couches, brick walls with little decoration. It appeared as if someone had hastily straightened it up because, despite the empty floor and coffee table, the entertainment center was crammed full of crooked books, games, and movies, and the trash can in the corner was bulging. Where was she?

She looked up and down at the long couch she was seated on and pinched at the wool blanket thrown across her lap. There was something she was forgetting. Something important. Not something, someone. It was right there...at the back of her miiiiiind... Ah ha! Sidekick! This must be Sidekick's home. She shoved the blanket off her legs and immediately made her way to a window, stretching her arms over her head as she rose.

Hmmm a little seedy. Was this the neighborhood right off of Cedar? That did--fzzt!--look like Mario's Sub Shop a couple blocks down. She carefully committed the visual of the street to memory. Lucky. Now she didn't have to stalk him home.

The fire escape balcony rattled and a thin, frowning face suddenly blocked her view.

"Move."

With a wide grin, Villain took a couple long strides back, allowing the vigilante room to slip in through the window.

"Wooow, spicy," Villain purred. "Just get off a job?"

Sidekick's cheeks flushed a little and he folded his arms across his bare midriff. He was outfitted in his hero costume, thick army boots, long black tights, and a matching long-sleeved crop top that hugged to his skin.

"You slept too long. There were people who needed saving."

"Hm. What's up with the costume anyway? You know I've always wondered?"

"I chose it as a teenager, and now it's a part of my brand. Why? What's wrong with it?" It was said with all of the defensiveness of a person who already had their own insecurities on the subject.

"Maybe I just don't want anyone else seeing you this way? I mean, you brought me home. That has to mean something."

Sidekick rolled his eyes. "Shut up. I didn't know where you lived. Just be grateful I didn't leave you in a dumpster." As if suddenly determined not to care about Villain's comments, he dropped his arms and strode past her into the kitchen. He glanced over his shoulder as he pulled a kettle and a pair of mugs out of the cupboard.

"You seem better. Not so..."

He awkwardly jerked his head to the side a couple times.

Villain wanted to smile, show him that his example didn't bother her, that it was even a little funny, but of course, any semblance of humor dropped her mouth to a frown instead.

"Yeah, well some days are better than others. Today must be a good one. How long have I been unconscious?"

"It's Wednesday now. So, just since yesterday afternoon. I thought about dropping you off at a hospital, but I figured you wouldn't like that, being a wanted criminal and all."

Villain moved after him and leaned her stomach up against the counter. Bits of static pricked at her brain, but she fought not to react. "Much appreciated." Then she smiled in confusion. "But why didn't you turn me in?"

Sidekick ran the kettle under the tap and placed it on the stovetop. "I guess because...then nobody would help you. Having those things shocking your brain all day, messing up who you are, it sounds like hell. You don't deserve that. No one deserves that."

"So you are going to help me!" Villain said, a couple tears streaming down her cheeks. "Do you need me to sit down? Can I go to the bathroom first? Cause since waking up, I've had to pee like a racehorse, and I don't know if I can hold it if I get another big shock."

"Woah, woah, woah." Sidekick threw up his hands. "I can't do it now."

A thank you faltered on Villain's lips. "Y-you can't?"

He paused then shook his head. "I've never done something that precise before. I don't even know how these implants work. If I do this recklessly, I could end up hurting you. I've already made that mistake once; I'm not making it again."

"Oh, um, yeah." Fzzt-fzzt! Villain grabbed her hair to keep her head from snapping to the side too sharply. "I guess that makes sense."

Even after the shocks dropped back into a buzz, Villain kept her hands on her head. It was just going to happen again in a couple minutes anyway. And she was so tired.

Sidekick wet his lips and fixed her with this cautious, semi-guilty stare. "And you can use my bathroom, just down the hall, on the right."

Villain nodded. "Thanks."

She felt like she should be able to leave the noise behind for a little while, let it sit at the kitchen counter with Sidekick for a few minutes while she took a few private moments to think over her situation. But static dogged each of her steps down the hallway. It followed her as she flushed the toilet, highlighted each twitch of her fingers as she turned on the sink, made her slap the soap bottle under the running water when a shock sharp enough to tweak her whole arm shot through her, and when she looked into the mirror she almost swore she saw it crackling in her eyes.

A wide grin split across her reflection's face. Villain stuffed her wet sleeve in her mouth to muffle a sudden peal of laughter.

I'm going to kill you.

The threat sounded weak this time, and the static's current cadence sounded a little like a laugh. Not the way Villain laughed when she was upset, but a real laugh. A mockery.

"You don't get to do that," she hissed, meeting her eyes in the mirror. "You don't get to screw me up, and then be normal yourself."

A stab of fear hit Villain in the chest. Her breath hitched. She talked to the static all the time, threatened it, yelled at it, bargained with it, but deep down she always knew she was pretending. This was the first time she'd actually, truly talked like the static had its own intent. Like it really had the emotions to laugh at her. She was really losing her mind.

No, don't think about that. Swallow it. Push it aside.

Villain took a deep breath, dried her hands on a towel, and walked back toward the kitchen. But just as she was about to turn the corner, the front door swung open so violently it hit the wall. A bit of dust crumbled from the ceiling.

"Sidekick!" Hero bellowed. "I got your stuff back!"

Villain pressed herself to the wall and peered carefully around the corner.

Sidekick whipped around, eyes wide, mouth twitching. Very subtle. "Hero! I-- Really? You didn't have to."

"No villain scum steals my partner's equipment!" Everything the burly man said was like a roll of thunder. He slammed Sidekick's compound recurve bow and quiver of arrows onto the counter with a wide grin. His movements were always hard and abrupt but also in constant good humor, so of all the heroes, it was hard for Villain to really dislike him.

He was sort of like if a Viking signed on for a L'Oreal modeling job. Massive shoulders, thick brown hair that reached the middle of his back, and long neatly trimmed beard mixed with braids.

"Is this mine?" he asked, already taking the second mug of tea from the counter and downing it in a couple loud gulps.

"Er, yes," Sidekick said. "I thought you might come by."

Hero wiped droplets of chamomile from his beard. "Good instincts."

Sidekick took his bow and arrow and went around the counter and into the living room to place them behind the couch. He flicked his eyes toward the hallway, and subtly thrust his chin at her to go back to the bathroom. Villain stuck her tongue at him. She was fine right here.

Sidekick sighed.

"What is it?" Hero said.

"Huh? Oh, nothing. They just...broke one of my arrows. But, um, Hero, since you're here...there was something I wanted to talk to you about."

Hero dropped back on his elbows against the counter. "Nothing bad I hope. HA!"

Sidekick smiled weakly, eyes flicking to Villain again as if partially to blame her and partially in search of support. "I'm thinking...maybe I want to take a break from hero work."

Hero's grin froze on his face. "What do you mean? Is everything ok?"

"Yeah! Yes, of course. Nothing is wrong. It was just a thought. You know, there are more options for people with powers than just the hero stuff. And before--" he cleared his throat "--what happened with my parents...happened, I was, I was thinking about exploring medicine--"

"Medicine?" Hero laughed. "Don't you think there are enough doctors in the world already? Did someone say something to you?" He moved across the room and clapped his hands down on Sidekick's shoulder so hard the smaller hero's knees wobbled. "Don't doubt your talents, Sidekick. You make a real difference out there. I don't know what I'd do without you."

Villain backed deeper into the hallway to stay out of Hero's peripheral, but she still saw Sidekick's tentative courage melt into a placid smile. What was probably hardest was that Hero honestly thought he was helping. He didn't want to hurt Sidekick. He had no idea that a few careless words could strike blows. If Villain sensed that, then Sidekick certainly did too.

"Thanks, Hero..."

"Anytime!" Hero beamed. "Now get some rest! You did good today!"

"Hm," Sidekick acknowledged. He walked with Hero to the door and choked out an upbeat, "See you later," but once the enormous man was finally gone, Sidekick's whole body drooped.

"Well that went well," Villain said, stepping out of the hallway.

"It's fine," Sidekick said. "It's sort of what I expected. Sorry, he drank your tea. I'll make you another cup."

"You don't have to."

"Well, I want to hear all about the history of that implant, and I find it's easier to talk about hard things when you're drinking something hot."

Villain's mouth parted in surprise. No one had ever treated her this way before. Like she might actually have feelings and struggles. Like a person. "In that case...go ahead."

She trailed him all the way into the kitchen, glitching every few steps until she was leaned back against the counter beside him. He still seemed a little down as he reached for a new mug, so Villain poked him in his exposed stomach.

Sidekick flinched back at the skin-on-skin contact, nearly dropping the mug. "Don't do that!" he said, cheeks flushing once again.

"Don't you get cold?" Villain said. "It's October. Do you have, like, a winter version? Twice the covering, but twice as cute?"

Sidekick's eyes roved over her frown-creased face, then seeming to register her expression as joking, he smiled. "Sometimes I put on a vest."

"Ooooh. Is it tight?"

"That does seem to be my trademark."

He found a new teabag to put in the mug and slowly poured hot water over it.

"I have sugar and cream here if you want any," he said, placing a pair of ceramic dishes on a tray along with both his and Villain's mugs and carrying it back to the coffee table in the sitting area. "Now why don't you explain everything."

Part Three

[boldlyvoid]

Amoreena | Chapter sixteen

Chapter Sixteen

main summary: Heaven is a real place and it's located exactly 14.6 miles away from the FBI, Quantico Headquarters. Off behind a small park, under a fantastical willow tree surrounded by wildflowers, in every colour young minds can imagine.

Don't forget, heaven also comes with angels.

Chapter Summary/Warnings: Amoreena meets Jo, Jo shares her experience with the foster homes (tw self-harm and child abuse), and Spencer shares his shitty childhood with her. They bond, he loves her more than he thought possible, his dreams of a big happy family are coming true.

word count: 4.8k

from the beginning <3

His phone is ringing at 7:50 and all he does is groan, forgetting Y/N’s agreement with Amoreena. His wife reached over his face and towards the phone, picking up with an overly cheerful tone for a pregnant woman who was up until 3 am.

“Hello sweet girl, how was your sleep?”

“Ugh,” she makes a weird face as the morning nausea kicks in and she tries to swallow it down. “Yeah? Oh, I’m so glad, dad and I are just waking up. We have another big surprise for you today… I know honey there’s always a lot going on, but this one is a good one I promise!”

“Can I go talk to her?” Spencer asks, “alone?”

“Dad’s going to come and see you while mommy has a shower, okay? I love you too, bye,” she smiles as she hangs up and passes the phone back to him.

They kiss quickly before separating, Spencer throws on the same clothes from the beach last night before heading down the hall towards Amoreena’s room. He knocks quietly before entering, seeing her sitting in a queen bed with 2 cats.

“Taylor let Olivia and Benjamin stay in here last night, she said they usually sleep in here anyway!” She was whispering, but it was still loud for her this early.

He sat on the edge of her bed and gave her a big hug, “how was your night?”

“Really amazing, Dad, Taylor is my best friend now,” she’s completely serious, “I hope mom’s not too upset about that, I guess we could share her…”

“That’s a nice thought, are you good at sharing?”

“I think so,” she nods with a serious face.

“Good, because there’s a new person who’s coming to live with us. She’s going to be kind of sad for a while and I’ll be spending a lot of time with her too,” he watches her face as she listens, confused but fine with it.

“Who is she?”

“Did your mom tell you how she made you?”

She nods, “she said sometimes people with penises donate sperm to help people have babies, and you were the one who donated for me,” she gives him a run down so seriously that it makes him laugh like the 7-year-old.

“Yeah, exactly, well I also helped 2 other families make babies,” he says softly, petting her hair as she understands what that means.

“So I have more siblings?”

“Yep, 2 sisters and a brother,” he smiles as she starts to bounce with excitement. “Josephine is 12, almost 13, and she’s coming to live with us.”

“Where is her mom?” She asks, he knew she would.

“Her mom and dad were in an accident, they died and she looked for me because she didn’t want to be alone anymore,” he knows it’s a hard topic, and that she understands death after losing her gg, but it’s still hard.

“Oh, that’s sad,” she frowns, moving in to hug him again, she keeps her head pressed to his shoulder. “I hope she’s okay, is she here now too?”

“She is, but I’m not sure if she’s awake yet, she’s a teenager and they sometimes sleep in longer than you would, like when Henry was over and slept until noon,” he has all his kids profiled in his minds and it’s actually more helpful than a hindrance.

“Does she like Taylor?”

He knew that one was coming too, “she’s a huge fan, she cried meeting her just like mom.”

“Is she going to call my mom her mom now?”

“I don’t think so, would that upset you?” He’s worried for the answer, he had the same jealous tendencies growing up. Hell, he still has them.

“No, she needs a mom, I would be very sad without mine, I know she needs one too,” she looked at him like it was a stupid question because of course, all kids need a mom and her mom happened to be the best.

“That’s really nice of you, she knows all about you and she’s really excited to move in with us, maybe you can help her decorate her room?” He isn’t sure what Jo will think, but he knows it would be good for bonding.

“Can we see if she’s awake? Wait, she’s a she right? Miss Kennedy said sometimes people look like girls but they don’t like to feel like girls, so we use they,” Amoreena was so worried about being a good sister he didn’t know why he worried so much.

“Well, I’m not sure, Jo hasn’t told me but you can ask?”

She shot right out of bed, still in her dress from last night as she ran to the door, “come on, what room is it?”

“Right there, knock nicely,” he says as he joins her in the hall, pointing to the room across from her.

She knocked 3 times, hearing a small ‘yeah?’ From the other side before opening it, “good morning!” Amoreena cheered.

“Amoreena!” Jo smiled as she got out of bed and ran over to her. She dropped to her knees so they’d be the same height and wrapped her up in her arms.

They hugged like this was a reunion and not an introduction, they held on to one another so tightly they both squeezed their eyes shut and held their breath. He knew that kind of hug, that was a hug you gave when you deeply loved the person you were hugging.

It made him want to cry, again.

Jo pulled back from her and Amoreena immediately held her face in her hands, observing her. “Yep, you’re my sister,” she smiled as she saw her nose.

That same perfect little button that was slightly angled towards the sky, she booped it lightly. Jo booped her right back.

“I am, it’s pretty cool getting to share a dad with you cause now I get to meet Taylor Swift, how the heck did we get so lucky?” Jo talks to her like she’s used to being around kids, finding the wonder in every word and saying the whole sentence with enthusiasm.

She turns to him, both his girls making the same face as they looked at him in the doorway, “how did you meet Taylor, dad?”

“You remember Uncle Dave? He came over for the barbecue and talked to poppy bob about winemaking all night?”

“Yeah, he’s Italian,” Amoreena remembered his funny accent and how she called him Mario.

“His daughter is Taylor’s friend, so Taylor sent me an email asking to meet you,” he couldn’t help but smile as she did.

“So you guys really are knights at the FBI, huh?”

“Yeah, but my armour got too rusty so now I’m going to guard the princess only, no more battles for me,” he was happy to make it magical, to turn the terribleness of it all into something she could be proud of.

He feels cold hands reaching under the back of his shirt then as he jumps, Y/N is wrapping her arms around him and pressing her cheek to his back, “your armour is fine, it just needs some polish.”

“They’re kinda gross, you’ll have to get used to that,” Amoreena says, pressing her lips together awkwardly as she looks at Jo.

“It’s nice though, it makes you feel like love is real,” Jo smiled back, “not many kids have happy families.”

“You do now, okay?” Amoreena took her cheeks in her hands again, something she must have learned from Y/N. “My family is your family and we are the best family, you’re going to have so much fun with us, can I help you decorate your room?”

Jo cried, laughing lightly as she nodded, “that would be cool, maybe we can get bunk beds for random sleepovers?”

Amoreena shot her eyes to her mom, “can we?”

“That would be cool,” Y/N agreed, “we’ll go to Ikea on Friday when I’m not working, okay?”

“And this weekend we can buy some paint for your room?” Spencer added, “you guys can plan all week together.”

“Yes!” Amoreena cheered, hugging Jo again.

Jo held her gently, resting her cheek against the top of Amoreena’s head with a small smile. She looked genuinely happy, peaceful like she belonged somewhere again.

Right then Amoreena’s eyes are darting right to him, “It’s fathers day!” She screams, way too loud for 8 am in someone else’s home. Thank god Taylor was on the other side of the mansion.

“Oh my god,” Amoreena smacked her forehead with her little hand, “I was so carried away with the wedding I didn’t pack your present, dad! I’m so sorry.”

“I’ve got you covered little miss,” Y/N smiled at her, “It’s in my purse!”

Amoreena pushed past them in the doorway and ran to their room in search of said purse. Probably emptying it out on the bed and making a huge mess, but it was fine.

Y/N took a moment to kiss his cheek, “good morning, happy father’s day.”

“Thank you,” he blushed, turning to face her and hold her close, “I can feel you staring Jo, come here.”

She comes skipping right over, wrapping her arms around them both and resting her head on Spencer’s side. For a 12-year-old she was tall, a lot taller than Henry was, that’s for sure.

“Hey!” Amoreena butts in, “let me in,” she pushed into the middle of the hug to steal all the warmth, “happy father’s day, dad.”

“Happy father’s day,” Jo added with a soft smile, “thank you for everything.”

“Yeah, you’re the best dad in the world, Jo you should see how he reads with his mind, he doesn’t even need to look at the books at bedtime,” Amoreena bragged, pulling back from all of them then.

Spencer wiped the tears from his face and pretended he wasn’t crying, overwhelmed by love just like he told Jo to expect. “I love you guys, I’m so glad I helped make you both, you’re the best kids a dad could ask for.”

“Here,” Amoreena hands him a wrapped present.

It’s a handmade book, blue construction paper bound with green ribbon in little loops and covered in a thin layer of tissue paper from the present he got her last week. He carefully removes the tissue and hands it back to her, “do you still want it for dresses?”

“Sure,” she takes it with a smile, “I wrote this for you after a dream I had, Miss Kennedy helped me write it all and reword it a bit. But it’s all from my brain.”

“Spencer’s little women,” he reads and then his heartbeat almost stops when he sees the bottom, “by Amoreena Reid.”

“We can go sit in the living room while you read it to us?” Y/N offered, taking the girl's hands and leading them all down the hallway.

Taylor’s house was full of floor-to-ceiling windows, allowing them to watch the sunrise over the ocean as they cuddled up on the couch as a family. Him and his little women.

“Once upon a time, there was a kingdom ruled by a beautiful princess who had a broken heart. She promised to hide away from the townspeople until she gathered all the pieces again,” Spencer read the first sentence and knew he wouldn’t be able to make it through the whole book.

“You know, I think it would be better if you read this to me Amoreena,” he asks her gently, “I want to know it from your voice first.”

“Okay,” she bounces up from where she cuddled into her mother to take the book from his hand, sitting straight as she got ready to read.

“Slowly, but surely, the pieces came back to her one by one as the people felt the need to search for her, they missed seeing her smile as she ruled alongside her parents, the king and queen until her heart was fixed.

A little girl, Lady Amoreena, arrived like a gift. A fairy godmother handing a small child to the princess to raise and love forever and ever, they were best friends more than anything.

But the princess’s baby girl made it her mission to fix the rest of her heart as she grew up seeing her mom frown, questing for princes and kings, even another princess to come and fill that last missing spot of her heart. To make their family love grew as the cracks from where they separated were healed.

She set off on her daily adventure, running off past the gates on the way to the willow tree, excited to see what wonders the pond of youth brought to her this time. Surprised to find a knight, his broken and rusty armour fallen on the ground, he was wrapped in weeds, he had been trapped for too long to remember.

Amoreena cut the vines off him with her sword, “you’re free now, sir knight.”

“How can I ever repay you?” The kind man with the same nose as her asked.

“Meet the princess, tell her about your battles, make her laugh and you can stay with us,” she gives him one final quest. His last ever duty.

The princess smiles as soon as they meet. He wins her over without even trying, he completes their family and makes all the cracks in her heart fuse back together. Gold light shines from her as she’s healed, completed by the love of a family she never knew she needed.

The love didn’t end there… the knight and the princess knew lady Amoreena would be like her mom when she grew up. The possibility of a sad and broken heart as she got older, so they made her 8 more siblings, her group of sisters to keep her company during the happily ever after part.

“Sir Spencer, where are all your little women?” The king of the land asked, seeing the knight and the princess all alone on the path, old and slow as they walked.

“Down by the pond, it’s story day!”

He knew that’s where they’d always be, at their pond with a book, braiding each other's hair, weaving flower crowns and chasing each other through the wildflowers that replaced the vines that once held him down.

Free, healed and happy. Spencer and his little women healed the princess, allowing her to take the role as Queen, like her grandma always wanted for her.”

“There isn’t a 'the end'?” Y/N’s voice questions lightly as Spencer cries too hard to even respond.

She was the most amazing child in the whole world and he didn’t know what he did to deserve her. He wrapped her up in his arms and held her so tight she was smacking his arm to let her go with a laugh, “I want to add more to it when I’m older, like GG’s book.”

“You can write one for all your sisters,” Y/N smiles at her softly, “you know, gg only wrote Amoreena because you came to her in a dream?”

She nodded, “that’s why I started writing this book for dad because I had a dream about him reading to all of us, he was so old it was funny.”

“How old?” He asks, remembering his reflection from his own dream.

“Like poppy, you had a white beard!”

“What did we talk about?” He doesn’t know why he wants to know so badly but he’s desperate to know if their dream was the same.

“It was story day, you and mom were late, but you said, ‘I’d never miss a Saturday with my little women,’” she smiles, “I’m so glad you’re my dad.”

She holds him back just as tight this time, snuggling into his chest as he breathes her in. His first little baby, even if she was the middle kid now, she was his baby, he couldn’t even imagine holding someone even smaller than her soon.

—

They take a quick trip to target in the morning, needing to get some things for Jo and Y/N really, really wanted chocolate-covered cranberries, making sure he knew that she would kill him if he didn’t bring them back to her. Finally having those pregnancy mood swings he was expecting.

Jo is quick to pick out some summer clothes and a bathing suit for the day as well as toiletries and anything else she wanted because Spencer said so. He was going to spoil her because he didn’t know what else to do. This is what he wanted from his dad, someone to see something, think of him and just get it to make him smile.

She saw some purple bedding that she liked, so it ended up in the cart. And then she needed some new pillow, and some fitted sheets… oh and those curtains are nice… and before they knew it they had $300 worth of things for her bedroom in the back of Y/N’s car.

Jo pressed her lips together awkwardly as they sat in the front seats of the car, he looked over at her and smiled, making her laugh, “this is the best father’s day.”

“I’m supposed to be getting you gifts today!”

“You are a gift, Jo,” he doesn’t mean to get sappy, but he can’t help the love he feels for her already.

“Drive before I cry, dude,” she turns to look out the window. “Are we going to have a 'ground rules and behaviour' speech like all the foster parents do? I have a feeling you have no idea what you’re doing.”

He starts the car then, pulling out of the lot and starting the 40-minute car ride back with her, “how do they normally set the rules in the foster homes?”

“They pay for my phone bill with the money provided for me each month and they sometimes get me the groceries I want for lunches and stuff but they mostly kept the money for themselves. I’m only allowed on the internet for an hour a day, homework has to be done in front of their eyes at the kitchen table, no food after 7 pm, lights off and no walking around by 9,” she gave the rundown and it made Spencer’s stomach turn.

“I will pay for your phone bill, you don't need to worry about that. We can even get you a new one when we get home. Y/N has great internet and every streaming service available, you don’t have a time limit here. Just promise me you’ll go outside sometimes?” He reaches a hand out to hold her’s while driving, letting her know he means what is coming next.

“I trust you have a way of life you’re used to, and I’m not going to change that on you, if you want to share things with me and be open and honest, I’m always here and I will never judge you. I don’t want you to ever feel like you need to hide things from me. And that being said, I trust you enough to use the internet safely, and not hack anything without good reason anymore?”

Derek was right, it’s surprisingly easy to be a dad. All you have to do is love them and be there for them.

“Okay, then I think you should know,” she takes a deep breath and a pause. “I’m pretty sure I like girls too, I never got to tell my mom that but I’m sure she knew, and I’m kind of scared to put my bathing suit on when I get home.”

“First of all, I’m proud of you,” he squeezes her hand 3 times, and she does it right back with a smile. “Secondly, why? Did you not get one you liked? I was fine buying any of them for you.”

“I have a lot of scars on my legs, and I don’t want to scare Amoreena,” she’s really ashamed of herself and Spencer understands it.

He rolls his sleeve up and extends his arm for her to see his very faded track marks, “I was drugged on a case once, I had an addiction after. The scars fade over time, but I also haven’t shown Amoreena my bare arms yet.”

“Mine are pretty faded now too, it’s been a few months, they look more like stretch marks,” she smiled at his honesty, feeling safer with him.

“If she asks, you can say it was from a cat at the foster home. She’ll think about Cinderella and the evil stepmother's cat, and then completely forget why she asked,” he assures her, knowing Amoreena like the back of his hand now.

“Lucifer,” Jo smiles, “I was like her as a kid too, always making up stories and finding new movies to be obsessed with. I have ADHD, by the way, but I’m un-medicated cause my last foster home didn’t listen to the school’s diagnosis,” she says it like it’s not a big deal.

His blood starts to boil at the thought of someone not taking care of her, “excuse me?”

“Yeah, and when I asked for a therapist they said no to that too, I was ‘fine’ apparently and they settled for a dead parents support group so that Colin could have a coffee while I sat there,” she’s oblivious to how terrible it is.

“Make me a list of all the things you want, I mean everything down to the most niche interest or therapy technique that you’ve researched and I will help you with whatever it is,” Spencer is furious at the conditioning she’s experienced to think this is okay.

“You don’t have to, dad, I’m okay now,” she lies and he can tell.

“You don’t have to be, believe me, I cry almost every night to Y/N about things I thought I had recovered from. If you want to talk to someone because you think it will help, or if you want medicine because you feel like it’ll help you focus better or just be happier, I’m here to help you get that.”

She goes quiet, staring at their hands where he’s still squeezing her palm. She rubs her thumb along the skin softly, “did your mom ever hurt you?”

“Only when she wasn’t really there in her own mind,” he presses his lips together right after, he’s never told anyone about it.

“Did your dad?”

“Emotionally, but he wasn’t there long enough to lay a hand on me.”

She nods at the response, “my dad was evil, I think he killed my mom in that ‘accident’, but on purpose.”

“I thought my dad was a murderer once too, but it was actually my dad’s friend,” he isn’t sure why he’s telling her everything, but she deserved to know.

“There was a pedophile in our town who killed this boy, Riley, and my mom told him about a man who was watching me like I was next. And Riley’s dad killed him, but I was so young my mind tried to think it was my dad who did it all.”

“Your old job must have really messed you up inside too, huh?” She tries to laugh it off, scared of his past but intrigued at the same time, he just nods at her observation.

“I have a friend, her name is Penelope, her parents died when she was a little bit older than you. She snuck out and they went to look for her, and they were in a car crash,” he makes sure she’s comfortable, her hand is still in his and her thumb is still moving over his skin.

“Like you, she got into hacking, the FBI had to hire her because she was so good she became a threat, you’d really like her,” he says, turning to look at her quickly, he loves the smile on her face.

“I’d love to meet her,” she smiled, “thank you, I wish you could have always been my dad.”

It breaks his heart a little, “well, you have me forever now.”

—

“Two questions,” Y/N’s voice approaches as she walks towards the trunk of her car.

Jo and Spencer are digging through all the shopping bags trying to find all the things that she needs for the afternoon, leaving the rest for the ride home.

“Here,” Spencer hands her the chocolate-covered cranberries, “king-sized bag.”

“I love you,” she smiles as she takes it, “the second question, how are the suitcases going to fit in there now? We have two kids to bring home, they’re going to be squished.”

“I don’t mind,” Jo smiles, “one time they didn’t have room for me in a car so I sat in the trunk for 15 minutes.”

Spencer wrapped her up in his arms, “every time you tell me a story about what has happened to you, I want to kill someone.”

She laughs, holding him back gently, “believe me, I was an asshole to them, they got what they deserved.”

“What did you do?” Y/N worries about what she’s capable of, Spencer can tell.

“I called the tax people and said they have been claiming foster kids as dependents and now they might have tax fraud charges coming their way,” she seemed very proud of herself. “I would never hurt someone, but I have no problem getting them in trouble.”

Y/N extended her fist, bumping it off Jo’s with a smile, “as you should! Now, come on, let’s go get ready for the beach.”

Jo skipped inside with Y/N, their arms linked as they did so. Spencer couldn’t believe this was his life now. He closed the trunk with a slam, picking up the bag of things he set aside before joining them inside.

“Surprise!!!!” Amoreena screamed as soon as he walked through the door.

There was a hand-drawn Happy Father’s Day banner hanging from the staircase and purple balloons all over the place.

“Happy father’s day!!!” They all cheered for him, even Taylor’s mom was there now, smiling at the display of affection.

Amoreena and Jo came running up to him, wrapping their arms around him and holding him close, nothing felt real. “Can you pinch me?” He asked them with a small smile.

He didn’t think they’d do it, but even Y/N walked over and started pinching him all over. Amoreena pinched his leg, Jo pinched his belly button and Y/N, she pinched his cute little butt as she pressed a kiss to his blushing cheek. “You’re very real, so are we.”

“I love you guys,” Spencer reminds them, holding them all as close as he can for just a moment, “okay, enough sappiness, let’s go to the beach!”

Amoreena and Y/N are already in their swimsuits under their sundresses, Jo, on the other hand, picked out some trunks and a tank-style swim top, hiding her scares just enough that she felt comfortable getting in the sand and building a castle with Amoreena.

Y/N laid on the towel beside Spencer in the shade, Taylor and her mom were playing scrabble on the picnic table, her dad was cooking up burgers on the grill. It was serene, it was perfect, they were a little family and it made absolutely no sense to him how it all worked out so well, but he wouldn’t change any of it.

“Look how big it is after lunch,” Y/N grabbed his attention, sticking her belly out as far as it could go, “I’m going to get so huge again, at least this time I’ll be the biggest when it’s cold out.”

“Are you comfortable? Do you need more sunscreen or water?” Spencer worried, making her smile as she pushed her sunglasses up and turned to him.

“I am fantastic, thank you, cutie.”

He leans in to kiss her gently, but she wraps her arms around him and pulls him down on top of her. Kissing him like she just rescued him from the sea and hasn’t seen him for years.

When he finally pulls away, he doesn’t go far. Just sitting up as he brushes her hair off her face, “I love you.”

“I love you, too,” she reminds him with another soft smile.

“I missed mother’s day with you by only a few days, but you should know you’re the best mother in the whole world,” he whispered, wanting to share his day with her because, without her, he wouldn’t be a father.

She pulls him into another kiss, hands resting on his cheeks as she breathes in deeply through her nose. It’s like she’s taking the soul out of his body, he's a part of her now forever and always. He never wants to be anywhere else.

tag list: @shemarmooresfedora @spencers-dria @spookyspence @reidsfish @manuosorioh @mochionly @samuel-de-champagne-problems @jswessie187

@k-k0129

[bonbonthedragon]

CONGRATS ON 800!! 🥳🥳

I have a BAKUGOU request for you my dear.

How would he be with an S.O that's forgetful/has a brain that goes 192902miles a minute? Like they'll be doing something and walk away for a second and forget what they were doing and start messing with something else?

He could have sworn he left you right here

What

The

Fuck

He swears if has to go on another scavenger hunt for you-

“Hey Katsuki” you held out a pork bun “want one?”

When the hell did you go to the market?! When did you leave the dorms??? Tf???

“Yeah sure” he huffs

Literally has to watch you in class

You’ll be doing your work one minute then he’ll look away for 5 seconds and you already made like 10 paper cranes that are just sitting happily on your desk

He’ll nudge your shoulder to get back to work, but then you catch his wrist instead and begin to tie a string bracket into it

“The hell you doing to me shitty woman?” He loudly whispered in the class

“Giving you a you a amazing boyfriend and I love you bracelet” then you finished tying it off, flashing you your own matching one you wore

He fought back a blush “tch, get back to work”

Sometimes he really wished you would just stay still

He’s massaging your back right now, and you won’t stop squirming

“Oi, be still”

You whine “can I just quickly go get a drink of water?”

“Fine”

He let you go...

And it’s been an hour since then

He sighs and goes down stairs

“(Y/n)-“

Boy stopped mid sentence

Were you reallly playing Mario cart with dunce face right now

You didn’t hear him, but instead glanced at the kitchen for some reason then jumped a bit

“Oh yeah! I wanted water” you got up, waving the electric blond good bye and strolled to the kitchen before spotting your boyfriend

“What are you doing down here?” You ask

He just sighed, walking toward you and picking you up, making you squeak

“We’re going to go take a nap, and I better not wake up to an empty bed”

You peeked over at him from behind “can we put of frozen 2?”

He sighed again, patting your leg amd rubbing it before kissing your thigh “yeah”

Yeah, you didn’t stay still, but you did stay in the bed while playing Minecraft on your laptop while he snoozed with a lazy arm thrown over you

At least he tried

[chaeryybomb]

“8 hours and counting...” || l.dh

anon: “Can you do a best friends to lovers with nct haechan?”

a/n: here you go! thank you so much for requesting and I might’ve went a bit overboard with this,,,

pairing: lee haechan/lee donghyuck x gender neautral reader

genre: best friend to lovers!au, college!au, fluff, slight angst, haechan lowkey being a jerk, slow burnish?

featuring: mark lee, huang renjun, lee jeno, na jaemin and choi jongho

word count: 2.3k (oops)

summary: haechan misunderstood the situation thinking you had found a boyfriend and allows jealousy to take over and it is up to you, to slap— well, more like kiss him back into reality.

Haechan stared at the red iPhone in front of him. Well, more like he was glaring at the device. The reason was because he sent a text to his dear best friend, L/N Y/N, asking to meet up at the cafe because he was bored and he wanted to spend time with you.

He sent that text a few hours ago. 8 hours ago to be more precise, his brain taunted.

Sighing, he stood and paced around the room as endless scenarios ran through his head. Usually you would’ve answered his text within seconds after he sent it, the latest you ever took was 20 minutes! And that was because you were in a replacement class! Haechan knew your schedule like the back of his hand, of course he knew when you were free to text. And this was one of the moments, so where the hell was you?

Maybe you had a replacement class you forgot to mention. Haechan scratched their side of his head as he tried to remember if you had any classes cancelled in the past week. You didn’t. What if you were kidnapped?! His eyes widened at the thought. Oh no, should he make a police report? But you have to be missing for 24 hours before you’re “officially” a missing person and it’s only been 8 hours and 47 minutes... (Technically 8 hours felt like 8 years in Haechan’s book.)

Before he could think of even worse situations, Haechan’s phone rang out loud and the boy quickly dived to answer it. He groaned in disappointment once he read the contact name. It wasn’t you, just stupid Mark Lee. He swiped the accept button and raised the phone to his ear. “What?!” He asked annoyed.

“Woah, someone woke up on the wrong side of bed today,” Mark said on the other line.

“Hahaha, very funny Minhyung. What do you want?” Haechan replied with a sarcastic laugh.

“Jesus, I was going to ask if you want to go to the arcade today. Renjun said he’s going to beat your high score at Super Mario,” Mark explained.

At mention Renjun, Haechan could hear his voice yelling, “Be there or be square!” in the background.

Haechan swiped out of the call app and into his texts, his message was still on delivered. At least it was better than being left on read, right? But there was also a 80% chance of you being missing.

“Hello? Dude, you there?” Mark’s voice drew Haechan out his thoughts. Haechan shook his head, maybe the arcade would be a good distraction.

“Yeah, I’m in.”

The arcade was not a good distraction.

“Bro, are you okay?” Mark asked as he slung his arm over the younger one. “Renjun beat you in Super Mario. I repeat, you—“ he jabbed his finger at Haechan’s shoulder “—lost to Renjun!”

Renjun, who was sitting across from Mark, kicked his shin under the table. The older hissed in pain as he grabbed his leg. Mark glared at the boy in front of him, who’s now indulging himself in a conversation with Jeno, pretending like he didn’t stab Mark on the shin with the back of his heel.

Haechan mindlessly stirred his soda with the plastic straw, the whole time his mind was occupied with you, you and you. He made a mental note to blame you the next time he sees you. It’s stupid Y/N’s fault that he lost to Renjun in Super Mario! Ugh, now he has to play the damn game again just to get back his rightful place at the top of the leaderboard.

He looked at his phone the nth time since he entered the arcade. His lockscreen was empty from any notifications. No new messages or any missed calls. His wallpaper was a picture of him and you, who was on his back. It was a candid picture (courtesy of Jaemin) and the two of you were caught in the middle of laughing. He loves the picture, but right now it’s becoming a reminder that you have yet to reply to his message. It’s officially been 12 hours since his text. 12 hours and still nothing.

Suddenly, his ears perked up at the sound of someone’s laughter. Not just anyone, he knew whose laugh was that. It was yours. There’s no doubt that it was your laugh, he’s heard it his entire life. (And it’s also his favorite sound but he’d rather die than admit that.) Haechan sat up straighter and craned his neck, his eyes scanning the area for a certain person.

And there you were, standing in all your glory. His eyes lit up once he found you, but they immediately darkened in the next second. You weren't alone, beside you was another boy. A boy that he did not recognize. He saw you open your mouth to say something which resulted in the boy to ruffle your hair and sling his arm around your neck. The two walk past their table from the mini cafeteria and into the arcade. You didn’t even notice him.

Haechan’s fist tightened around the head of the chair as he watched you and the boy laugh together. Who the fuck was he and why the fuck was he with you? Mark seemed to notice where Haechan was staring and spoke up.

“Oh hey, isn’t that Y/N? HEY Y—MMPH!” Haechan swiftly moved to slap his hand over Mark’s mouth. He waited till you and the mystery boy disappeared into the aisle of arcade machines and finally slumped back into his seat.

“What the fuck was that for?!” Mark demanded and glared at the boy beside him.

Haechan rolled his eyes at the older and slumped back deeper into his seat, a pout on his lips. Mark paid no mind to him and just ruled it as one of his moments. While the other boys were laughing at Jeno choking on a french fry, a thousand thoughts were running through Haechan’s mind. The main one was who was the guy with you?

You couldn’t possibly have a boyfriend, right? No, you wouldn’t. You would’ve told him. That’s what best friends do, right? But that’s what he’s always going to be to you.

The best friend. He hates it.

Something’s wrong with Haechan. You’re sure of it. You stared at your phone in your hand as you reread his reply over and over again.

Haechan [8:33am]: hey you wanna go to the cafe for breakfast??

Haechan [8:35am]: hello???

Haechan [8:35am]: y/nnnnn

Haechan [8:36am]: don’t ignore meee :((

You [9:42pm]: omg im so so sorry

You [9:42pm]: im sorry hyuck i was at a family reunion :(((

You [9:43pm]: we can go to the cafe tomorrow if you’re still up for it!

Haechan [9:45pm]: i have plans tomorrow. maybe next time.

You [9:46pm]: alright..

First of all, Haechan would’ve popped off at you for replying to his texts so late and for ignoring him the whole day unintentionally. And secondly, he would’ve sent multiple texts at once, all caps and fighting emojis. Not just “i have plans tomorrow. maybe next time.”

“Who are you and what did you do to my best friend,” you mumbled to yourself. You sighed to yourself and placed your phone back on your desk. Maybe he’s really mad at you for ignoring him the whole day. In your defense, you were showing your cousin around town! You hadn’t checked your phone the entire day.

‘I should probably get him coffee as an apology tomorrow,’ you thought to yourself as you got ready for bed. Yeah, coffee sounds like a good plan.

You were wrong. It was not a good plan. It all started the next morning when you sent a good morning text to Haechan. He didn’t reply to you. You found it weird but you brushed it off. Maybe he was rushing off to school. He had a habit of waking up late anyways.

But the moment you saw him at campus, he immediately took off without giving you a chance to call out for him. Even weirder. Every corner you turn, there he is laughing with someone else but the moment you take your eyes off him for a second, he’s gone. You furrowed your eyebrows as you watched Haechan trying to subtly walk away from you. He can’t really be that mad at you, right?

It has been 4 days since you last saw Haechan and it basically confirmed your suspicions. He was avoiding you. But the question was why?

You tried to remember if you did anything to piss him off the past week but your brain gave you nothing. You tried asking his friends but they shrugged as they didn’t know the reason as well. You finally decide that you had enough of it and go to confront him.

So that’s how you ended up in front of Haechan’s apartment door. You rang the doorbell and waited, rocking back and forth on your heels. You heard shuffling coming from behind the door and it opened to reveal a just-woken-up-from-a-nap Haechan.

You smiled at him once he opened the door but Haechan’s eyes widened and he slammed the door shut. You blinked. What just happened? Regaining from the shock of his actions, you wasted no time and bent down to get the spare key under the welcome mat.

You quickly opened the door to his apartment and stepped in, ready to give Haechan a piece of your mind for his stupid antics. Haechan shrieked when he saw you came in.

You glared at him and jut her finger at him accusingly. “You’ve been avoiding me,” you said.

Haechan gulped and played it off. “No, I have not,” he said through gritted teeth and walked past you to the kitchen.

“Yes, yes you have! I texted you and you didn’t even reply back for days, Haechan,” you said, following him into the kitchen.

“Taste of your own medicine, then,” he mumbled under his breath. But it was loud enough for you to pick it up.

You raised a brow and scoffed. “Is this because I didn’t answer your texts the other day?”

Haechan turned his head to the side, not wanting to make eye contact. His lack of response told you that it was a yes.

“Haechan, you can’t be serious. I told you I was at a family reunion!”

You stared at him with your doe eyes widened. “Boyfriend? I don’t have a boyfriend, what are you talking about?”

“Are you sure you weren’t out with your boyfriend,” he blurted out. Haechan slapped his hand over his mouth, that wasn’t supposed to be said out loud.

“I saw you with another guy at the arcade that day,” he blurted out once again. He winced once those words left his mouth. Dang it Haechan, couldn’t he keep his mouth shut just this once?

You blinked for a few seconds before realization finally settled in. You couldn’t help but laugh at his accusation, causing Haechan to glare at you. “You mean Jongho? He’s my cousin,” you told him after you stopped laughing.

Oh.

Your cousin. The word echoed in his head. The "boyfriend" was just your cousin.

“Besides,” you added, leaning against the counter, “why would you care if I got a boyfriend anyway? What, do you like me or something?”

Haechan visibly stiffened at the last sentence. Oh boy, he hopes you didn’t notice him freeze. But of course you noticed it, you noticed every detail of him.

“Wait, do you actually like me?” You asked. You were internally panicking. Holy shit, does he like you? It’s too good to be true, right?

“Yeah,” he said quietly after a few seconds of silence. He was looking down at his feet. “Is that a bad thing?” He whispered, finally lifting his head up to meet your gaze.

‘Of course it isn't, because I like you too,’ you wanted to tell him. You had liked him the moment he introduced himself as your neighbour when they were 6 years old. But the way he flirts around other girls always gave you the thought that he didn’t feel the same.

You stayed silent too long for Haechan’s liking. ‘Oh no, they’re going to reject me,’ he thought. Before you could even open his mouth, he quickly added on, “It’s okay if you don’t like me though! I totally get it.”

“Haechan—“

“No, no it’s okay, Y/N. I understand. You don’t like me, I mean of course you wouldn’t. You probably see me as a brother and nothing more. So let’s just forget this ever happened and—“

He was too busy rambling to notice that you were advancing towards him. You got on your tiptoes and gave him a peck on his lips. Haechan immediately shut up, and froze on the spot. It was merely a peck but it was more than enough to make him stop working. His cheeks were now red at the sudden contact. You had an amused smile in your lips.

“D-Does this mean you like me too?” He stuttered out.

Instead of saying anything, you nodded and wrapped your hands around his neck, bringing him down for another kiss, this time it was longer. Haechan smiled into the kiss and wrapped his arms around your waist.

When you pulled away, you whispered, “I like you too, idiot.”

[bonus]

“Wait, so Jongho is that cousin who could break apples with his hand? While singing?!” Haechan repeated what you told him. You were now sitting on his lap, your back against his chest, his arms around you.

“Uh huh, he even broke a watermelon with his finger once,” you added. “And he’s like an older brother to me, so if you ever break my heart...”

Haechan visibly shuddered at the thought of Jongho breaking his neck. He hugged you tighter and buried his head into your neck, causing you to let out a laugh.

thank you for reading and requests are open!

[lcnelyinthesky]

that time - kenma x reader

a/n: good evening! i feel like i haven’t written in ages, but maybe i kinda wish this wasnt the piece i was coming back in with. in any case, here she is.

based on that time by regina spektor

genre: angst

warnings: heavy mentions of drug use and suicide.

word count: 1.4k

Do you remember the time when I found a human tooth down on Delancey?

It was a perfect spring day. The flowering trees existed in all of their beautiful glory, painting the green grass with splotches of pinks and purples. You walked around a park, looking to meet up with your boyfriend Kenma.

Hey, remember that time we decided to kiss anywhere except the mouth?

Your boots clunked around your feet with every step you took. The legs of your baggy jeans rubbed against themselves as you walked, creating the slightest vibration. The light cotton of your shirt melted into your skin. Your hands found each other behind your back, fingers interlocking. You looked around at the trees and benches and people in dark clothes as you strolled along the paths.

Hey, remember that time when my favorite colors were pink and green?

You remembered the past fondly, a small smile creeping to your face as you thought about the first time you met your kitten. You were at a party with your friends, passing drunken stories around the circle you had formed together. Your pastel pink shirt was tucked into your olive green pants, the fabric held together by a grey belt with a chain attached to the loops. You moved the silver links around in your fingers when a group of guys came in, a particular one catching your eye more than the others. 

Your fingers anxiously fiddled together while you dug deeply into the yellowish eyes of the man standing above you, who proceeded to shoot you a coy smile. He sat down next to you, maroon fabric of his shirt folding as his posture faltered.

He took a liking to you instantly, both of you clicking as stories continued to pass around the room. You giggled as his face turned red every time a so-called “Kuro” poked fun at him. 

Hey, remember that month when I only ate boxes of tangerines?

You were just broke college students, but you made it work. Your shared, albeit small, income covered the rent of a tiny studio apartment and you figured the rest out somehow. None of that really mattered though, because you’d take waking up in his arms, engulfed in his cinnamony scent, over a dorm any day. He was always so cute in the morning. His sleepy eyes told you they loved you without him uttering a word. His hair would be in every single direction but he wore it so well.

So cheap and juicy, tangerines.

Kenma spent most of his time at home. You’d carry him to bed after he passed out at his post, eyes glued to a monitor. You’d lay his exhausted body in bed before you went to shower, and when you’d come back to him, his position would have changed entirely. You’d climb in next to him and face him while he slept. The scent of orange on your breath became something that could never fail to lull him to sleep.

Hey, remember that time when I would only read Shakespeare?

You were always one with spurts of energy, whereas his energy was constant and unwavering. You’d randomly tell him something you wanted to do and he’d laugh, causing a flame that allowed you to actually get it done. 

“I’m gonna memorize Lady Macbeth’s monologues. All of them.” You looked up from your phone at your boyfriend. His gaze met yours as his mouth twisted into a smirk and his eyebrows raised.

“Definitely, baby. I’ll learn Macbeth’s and we can be them for Halloween.” He laughed at you slightly, but it was all out of love. It always was.

Hey, remember that other time when I would only read the backs of cereal boxes?

You sat at the kitchen table in a trance, staring down the box your breakfast came from. Kenma walked in, sleepily trudging towards you, and asked what you were doing. The words came in one ear and out the other, an empty haze going over your brain. He went to the kitchen and tried to hide the clinking of a pill bottle with a story about a woman he saw in the park. He swallowed something mint green with water, before asking you--once again--about your blank stare.

“Baby, what’s wrong?” Kenma walked over to you and placed an arm around your back, bringing you back to reality. You shook your head and looked up at him, asking flirtatiously if you could join him in a morning shower. He stuttered out an “okay”, but that’s when the worry started.

Hey, remember that time I tried to save a pigeon with a broken wing?

“Kenma! Hey!” You shouted, panicked in front of your apartment complex, a bird in your hands. The sky was a pale grey that contrasted heavily with your bright yellow shirt. The terrace attached to your living room had someone standing on it now.

“What the hell is that?”

A street cat got him by morning, and I had to bury pieces of his body in my building's playground

You wore black the next day. Something in you became used to the lack of color. It wasn’t exactly a change in personality, and it sure was subtle. Kenma never noticed when your closet’s colors started to fade. Nothing confused him when you left your pink shirts at the laundromat on purpose. Yet he was so observant elsewhere.

I thought I was going to be sick

But maybe something went too deeply into his brain, occupying his every thought. Nothing really seemed too different because his focus was always deep in a video game, but then you beat him at Mario Kart.

Hey, remember that time when I would only smoke Parliaments?

He wasn’t as sharp with a controller in his hands. He stopped falling asleep at three in the morning, sometimes turning in at as early as ten. He started spending more time away, walking down the alleyways between office buildings before and after his normal desk job. 

Hey, remember that time when I would only smoke Marlboros?

You woke up at seven one morning to an empty bed, knowing you fell asleep next to your boyfriend at twelve the night before. You rubbed your eyes and stretched your arms, walking twenty feet to see a blob of dyed blond hair and plushy black fabric. 

Hey, remember that time when I would only smoke Camels?

The bags under his eyes were deeper and darker than you had ever noticed them. His eyes fluttered open at the soft touch of your hand and he groaned at the brightness of the light. 

Hey, remember that time when I was broke?

“Shit, y/n. My neck hurts.” His arm reached around to massage the back of his neck, wincing his eyes shut at the light movement. 

“What’s this about, Ken?” Concern littered your face and nipped from your voice. He came back to reality slowly.

I didn't care; I just bummed from my friends

“I- uhm. I got too warm and had to sleep on the couch. Sorry, baby.” He seemed genuine. He put on a genuine face for you. The stutter made you doubt him.

Hey, remember that time when you OD'ed?

You were still strolling about a park, waving hellos to birds as they flew by. The black denim of your baggy jeans rubbed together, creating the slightest vibration. A tear fell from your squinting eyes at the memory. The happy facade you created fell quickly and all at once. 

Hey, remember that other time when you OD'ed for the second time?

You were looking to meet up with your boyfriend Kenma at the usual spot. He would be sitting there happy to see you, ready to push your hair from your face the second you sit down next to him.

Well, in the waiting room while waiting for news of you

Plot 34D. There were always flowers placed in the small vase. Kuroo came every three Thursdays. You typically went on Saturdays.

I hallucinated I could read your mind

“Hey, Kenma. On the way over here I was thinking about that one summer I only ate those tiny oranges! Remember how you always said they reminded you of your friend Shoyo?” You giggled, tear falling onto the well-maintained grass. “I stole one from a little farmers market in town and ate it right there. You would’ve scolded me so bad.”

And I was on a lot of shit too, but what I saw, man, I tell you it was freaky

[seagreen-meets-grey]

Hooked On A Feeling Ch. 1

When Hiccup and Astrid realize they've never hung out alone before, they decide to change that. And how do you better spend time with your Good Friend than by playing Mario Kart all night?

[Chapter 1: Come A Little Bit Closer] [Chapter 2: Fooled Around And Fell In Love] [Chapter 3: Go All The Way]

Crossposted on ao3 and ff.net

_______________

Hiccup was at his fourth beer when he noticed.

He was leaning against the railing of Justin’s balcony, the cold night air cooling his skin, warm from the heat of the living room and the alcohol. It was game night, a tradition he and his friends had started over two years ago when none of them had really known anyone yet, trying to find their place on Berk’s huge university campus. Some of them had been in the same campus tour group on day one, the rest had met in class. If Hiccup recalled correctly, it had been Justin, also known as Fishlegs among his friends, who had suggested a night of board games and bonding, which had turned into a bi-weekly event of drinking and trash-talking each other over SingStar, Monopoly, Cards Against Humanity and the like.

Currently, they were taking a quick break from playing. Tuffnut and Snotlout needed a smoke break, Fishlegs one of his many potty breaks, and the rest of them just went along.

Hiccup was fairly sure that Tuff’s twin sister was filling up everyone’s water glasses with vodka, which would at least result in a hilarious moment of spitting out drinks all over Hiccup’s Monopoly board. He had long ago decided to never take his Game of Thrones board to game night if he didn’t want it back sticky and covered in oily crumbs.

He had opened a new beer bottle and followed Tuff, Snot and Astrid outside, engrossed in a conversation about the latest rumor about two of their professors dating.

By the time the two cigarettes were merely tiny smoldering dots in the ashtray on the windowsill, snowflakes started to descend silently from the dark sky. Snotlout looked up and stuck out his tongue to catch one, but it fell into his eye which made him whine and dramatically stagger off to the bathroom to wash it out, with an excited Tuff in tow who began to tell him a story of one of his many cousins who supposedly went blind from a snowflake in his eye.

“Muttonheads,” Astrid mumbled when the boys were gone.

Hiccup grinned and shook his head. “If we’re lucky, Tuff manages to make Snot so paranoid that we can sell him anything that will apparently prevent him from going blind.”

Astrid leaned against the railing next to him, a mischievous twinkle in her eyes. “I’m intrigued, Haddock. Keep talking.”

Animated by her reaction, he fell into his habit of gesticulating while talking, beer bottle still in hand. “Like, we could tell him about this old myth that says making bad choices in board games will increase your body’s healing capabilities.”

“Yes!” Astrid pointed a finger at him. “We’ll let Tuff scare him further with his ridiculous tales about cousins he doesn’t have, and he’ll eat right out of our hands.”

She was beaming at the chance to mess with their friend, and for a while, they kept brainstorming ideas to make Snotlout lose at Monopoly on purpose.

He was taking another sip of his beer when it hit him.

“Hey,” he interrupted her newest plan and she raised her eyebrows in question. “You know what I just realized?”

“That most of our friends share one brain cell?”

He chuckled. “No, I already knew about that. I meant… We’ve never, you know, done this before.” He gesticulated between him and Astrid.

“Messed with our friends?”

“No. No, I mean, I mean we do that a lot, but… But, you know, we never-- we never hung out like this before, just- just the two of us.”

He could see the same realization dawn on her. “Oh my god, you’re right.”

“Haven’t we?”

“We haven’t!” She shook her head disbelievingly. “How long have we been friends now? Almost three years, right?”

Hiccup nodded. “True. And we never really hung out outside this group.”

Astrid shivered and gestured with her head to go back inside. “We have to change that.”

They sat back down next to each other on the large sofa. Astrid reached for her water glass but was smart enough to sniff at it before taking a sip. From the corner of his eye, Hiccup spotted Ruffnut peering over in anticipation. He heard her curse when Astrid took the nearest bottle of coke and filled her glass to the brim. She took a scrutinizing sip, scrunching up her face for a second, shrugged and settled with it.

“So what do we do?” she asked, taking another sip.

Hiccup hummed in thought, crossed his arms and leaned back, tapping the neck of his almost empty bottle against his arm. “And when do we do it?”

“Do what?” Fishlegs asked, sitting down in front of his side of the Monopoly board.

“Hang out,” Hiccup and Astrid said in unison. Astrid held up her hand and without looking Hiccup gave her a high-five.

“Uhm,” Tuffnut said and made an open gesture. “Aren’t you hanging out right now?” He squinted his eyes. “Or is hanging out what the kids are calling it these days?”

Astrid threw a game piece at him and Hiccup felt a blush rise to his cheeks. “Hanging out as friends, you muttonhead!” she yelled.

“Right,” Tuff said, although Hiccup could tell he didn’t quite get it yet – or believed it.

“Hey, Hiccup,” Fishlegs chimed in, “didn’t you order Mario Kart for your Switch last week?”

“I did!” Hiccup sat up straight and turned towards Astrid. “All 48 races. Next Friday. We stay up all night. Loser buys the other a Christmas gift.” He offered her his hand.

She considered it for a second. “No falling asleep and the gift has a cost limit.”

They shook hands.

“Deal.”

_______________

Hiccup was at her place at nine, his Switch and Mario Kart game in his bag, as well as the ingredients to their self-made pizza. In return, her fridge was filled with energy drinks.

They said cheers with the first can and started on the pizza.

Astrid’s apartment had underfloor-heating that made the kitchen warm and cozy. Outside in the dark night, more snow was falling, covering the world in a white blanket. Music was coming from Astrid’s portable loudspeaker box.

“Someone’s been watching Guardians of the Galaxy,” Hiccup noted while he rolled out the premade dough on the griddle to the Marvel movie’s official mixtape.

“Nah, just dug it out when I went through my playlists.” She started humming and dancing on the spot where she was cutting onions on the kitchen counter.

She could feel the caffeine from the energy drink settle in her system. Using her knife as a microphone, she twirled around to face Hiccup at the kitchen table. “I’m hooked on a feeling!” she sang, taking joy in the way Hiccup started laughing at how off-key she sounded. “I’m high on believing!” She slid across the tiles in her beloved blue fleece socks, holding the knife-mic out to Hiccup.

“That you’re in love with me!” he sang into the fake-mic, equally off-key. She danced back to her cutting board and took another large gulp of energy drink. Not that she thought that hanging out with Hiccup wouldn’t be fun, but she just hadn’t anticipated it to be this nice.

While the pizza was in the oven, she opened her second drink and pulled Hiccup to his feet. Later, she claimed it was the caffeine coursing through both their bodies that made them decide they should have a dance-off right there in her small kitchen. Sliding on soft socks, slipping and catching themselves on the furniture or each other, they alternated between battling each other in ridiculous dance moves and twirling each other around, bumping into the table and counter several times.

When the oven timer went off, Hiccup loaded three big pieces each on two plates while Astrid disappeared into her little study room and came back with a DVD case in her hand.

“I’m up for some Home Alone, how about you?” She really hoped he wasn’t one of those people who hated the movie. Christmas time was Home Alone time for her.

“Am I ever!” Hiccup exclaimed and Astrid whooped and skipped off to her bedroom. He took a deep breath before he followed her, smile ever-present on his face.

They settled on her queen-sized bed, the desk with the large TV she got from her uncle Finn for her birthday in front of it, pizza and energy drinks on a tray between them.

Hiccup was impressed with the accuracy and passion with which she recited basically half the movie. But her amused expressions told him he didn’t fare any different with his impressions of Kevin and the bandits alike.

"I always think," she said when Kevin prepared his master trap, "that I'm glad Kevin seems to know what he's doing. Would have been a fucking chaos if he didn't."

Hiccup nodded vigorously. "Wanna know a fun fact about me?"

She peeled her eyes away from the screen and looked at him, genuine interest in her eyes.

"When I was a kid- actually, it started when I was a kid, and when I was fifteen, I was, like– Anyway, um… Basically, Kevin McCallister was my childhood hero."

"Oh, no." The dread in her voice didn't match the anticipating grin on her face.

"Yep," he said, popping the p. "Made my parents' life hell, especially because my inventions and traps never worked the way I wanted them to."

"Oh my god," she laughed.

"My father still doesn't let me live down the day I decided to rebuild the zipline Kevin uses to get from the house to his tree house."

"But it shouldn't even work in the movie, like, all of these traps are bullshit, realistically speaking." She wiped tears from laughter out of her eye.

Hiccup gave her a deadpan expression. "Well, fifteen-year-old me was confident he had made the right tweaks."

"What happened?"

"Umm…" He averted his face and she leaned over the tray to shake his shoulder.

"Now you have to tell me!"

Hiccup sighed and turned back to her, trying to keep up his serious expression. "I had fastened the end of the line, the one that started at the house, on the windowpane. At that point we were living in this old house with wooden panes. You can probably guess where this is going."

"Nope, totally lost. Don't leave out even one detail." Hiccup shot her an unbelieving expression, but she kept looking at him with that twinkle in her eyes, so he gave in with a defeated sigh.

"Fine, the wood was too old, it snapped when I jumped, I fell and broke my left leg in two places. Had to wear a cast for weeks. From then on, I was done with those experiments."

“But you’re studying engineering.”

He shrugged. “Exactly. Never said I was done with all kinds of experiments forever.”

A sly grin formed on Astrid’s face right when on TV the hot iron trap went off. “Let’s use the energy that kept young Hiccup going on Snotlout and the twins.”

He slowly shook his head. “You. Are. Evil.”

“Nope, not evil.” She opened two new cans of energy drinks and handed him one. “Just working with what I got to make the world a better place in these difficult times of Snotfaces and Nuts.”

He snorted and threw her an amused look. He was definitely in the right company.

_______________ 

“Alright.” Astrid stretched in the middle of her room and cracked her knuckles. “Let’s do this. I’m ready to destroy you.”

Hiccup just hummed disbelievingly from where he was setting up his gaming system. “Better open the windows for a few minutes first, the air in here is really bad.” When Astrid did just that, he added, “because it smells of loser!”

“That’s because of you,” she countered without batting an eye.

“I know, my fault, I should have thrown you out earlier.” A pair of socks flew over his head while he was plugging in the HDMI cable. "Miss me, miss me, now you gotta kiss me."

"Keep that up and I'll have to kiss you for real."

Hiccup looked up at her and saw her eyes dart back up from somewhere below his midriff. He looked at the backside of his pants. Did he have a stain there? He couldn’t find anything. Dismissing it with a shrug, he joined Astrid on the bed again. She handed him his energy can, opening another one for herself. This couldn’t be good for their health.

While the game was loading, Astrid repeated the rules. “We play all 48 races. We can’t fall asleep. If one of us does, the other is strictly obligated to wake them up. Loser buys the other a Christmas present but it has a clear cost limit.”

“Wouldn’t we get each other little gifts anyway?”

“Additional present, then.” She took a large gulp of her drink.

“I don’t think you should drink so much of that stuff; your body’s energy will drop tremendously as soon as the effect wears off, and you’ll fall asleep. Also, you’ll get diarrhea.”

She threw him an unimpressed look while he took a sip as well. “Look who’s talking. Besides, I know my own body. I’ve done this before.”

“Sure,” Hiccup shrugged and dipped his head back to drain the can. “Let’s deal with it when the time comes.” He wasn’t able to keep still anymore, wiggling his toes to countermeasure the pace of his heart. Definitely not good for their health. They really shouldn’t do this. There was a pop and a sizzling sound and he was handed a new drink. Oh, well.

When the Mario Kart home screen came up, Hiccup took his controller and chose the right settings. Astrid grabbed the other one and tested out the buttons. It had been a while since she’d last played it, but Hiccup was dead certain she hadn’t forgotten how to properly kick his butt. Or, as he would make sure in tonight’s case, die trying. He’d love an additional Christmas present from her, and he’d love even more to destroy her. Smirk on his face, he moved the stick to choose his character as she did the same.

“You can’t be serious!” Astrid yelled accusatory. “Link isn’t even a Mario character!”

“So?” he shrugged. “He’s a choosable character and you know I love Legend of Zelda.”

She wasn’t having any of it. “You can’t play a non-Mario character in a Mario game, Hiccup.”

“He’s still a Nintendo character, and what’s the big deal?”

“We said we would play this right, so no characters from other games. Choose another one!”

“If I have to pick a character other than the one I always pick, you have to do the same,” he argued. “No Bowser for you, milady!”

“At least he’s from Mario.”

“Do it properly, Astrid!” He grinned. “If I have to repick, then so do you.”

She groaned and rolled her eyes. “Fine! But I don’t trust you with this. I’ll choose for you.”

He stuck out his hand. “Only if I get to choose for you.” They shook on the deal and switched controllers.

“Let’s see…” Astrid mumbled while going through the different available characters. “Got it!” She pushed a button to confirm her selection.

“What?!” He threw his hands up in indignation. “Why am I Waluigi?!”

“Because he looks like you.”

“Pah!” He quickly selected her character. “I guess you’re Baby Peach, then.”

She huffed. “Really, Hiccup?! Because she’s blonde?”

“No,” he said, smirk back on his face, “because she's a helpless baby and she, too, needs saving all the time because she keeps getting kidnapped by the same dude over and over again and she’s a bi– uff!“ She shut him up by surprise-tackling him to the mattress.

“Oh, really? Who needs saving now, huh?”

He struggled underneath her, but she had him pinned down with her full weight. His chest was warm underneath her arms and his face very close to hers. She furrowed her brows. Had he always had that many freckles? And did he know that there were so many shades of green in his eyes? She noticed the stubble on his chin, and he actually smelled really nice.

When her face suddenly started to feel hot, she did the first thing that came to her mind; she pushed him off the bed.

“Ow, why would you do that?!” Hiccup pulled himself up on the edge of the bed, and Astrid hoped he hadn’t seen the blush that was only slowly leaving her cheeks. But he had seen it.

For a moment, he frowned in confusion. Why was she acting so flustered?

“That’s for making me Baby Peach and comparing me to her,” she said evenly, trying to sound nonchalant, but she would still not meet his eyes. Huh. Maybe he could work with that, he thought, caffeine pulsing in his blood – whatever weird thing was going on.

They settled back into position next to each other, an arm’s length of space between them, and started the game. While they were racing over Cheep Cheep Beach, throwing shells and bananas at each other, Astrid didn’t say a word. Hiccup made a few comments every now and then and tried to trash-talk her, but she didn’t seem to hear him. Her face was focused but her eyes were far away. He hoped she wasn’t mad at him because of the Baby Peach thing.

His character broke through the finish line first.

“Wait, what?!” she shouted, perplexed, after she came in sixth.

Hiccup grinned mischievously at her. “Maybe you should pay more attention to the game if you want to win.”

“I was paying attention,” she insisted, “it’s because of stupid Baby Peach, she’s useless! Let’s start anew with our characters.”

Hiccup feigned shock, holding his hand to his heart. “What, you – Astrid Hofferson – want to back out after only one race?!”

She glared at him and raised her chin with determination. “I’ll show you a race, Waluigi!”

“That’s what I thought.”

Racing through the Water Park course, Astrid did her best to keep her concentration on the game, but her attention was continuously diverted. Why was it so nice to be so close to Hiccup and why was she suddenly so aware of him? She could feel his body heat next to her where they were sitting on her bed in their pajamas at 1 a.m. She’s had five energy drinks and she kind of wanted to make out with him.

It didn’t help at all that, during the next five races, his leg moved closer to hers inch by inch until their knees were touching, and from time to time, he shifted on his butt and leaned very close to her in the process. He let out this quiet chuckle that pierced straight through her heart and then he was suddenly sitting normally again and she realized she’d been driving against walls for a minute.

He won the fifth race with several positions ahead of her and she wanted to whack her controller on his stupid face.

“Whohoo!” Hiccup shouted, celebrating by jumping up from the bed and doing a little dance in front of the TV.

“You cheated,” she grumbled when he let himself fall back next to her.

“Astrid, you can’t cheat on Mario Kart.”

“You also don’t play a non-Mario character on Mario Kart and yet here we are,” she countered.

“But I’m not even playing Link.”

“Yes, because I saved you from that.”

“I never needed saving. See, that’s the difference between me and Peach–“

She punched him on the arm, shutting him up. “Feeling overconfident, are we?”

“Score.” He pointed at the ranking list on the screen.

“Pff,” she made, “we’re just getting started, Haddock.”

With matching competitive grins, they got ready for the next race.

“Ha!” Astrid exclaimed when she sent a blue shell for Hiccup on the N64 Rainbow Road and lead the brigade of opponents rushing past him, claiming her first victory of the night.

She finally went on a winning streak, the adrenaline that came with it keeping her from getting drowsy, unlike the not-cheating cheater next to her. Nine races later, she stretched her arms with a loud yawn and used the pause to check the messages on her phone while Hiccup leaned back against the wall and closed his eyes.

It wasn’t long until his head rolled to the side and came to rest on her shoulder, his even breaths tickling her neck. She bit her lip. They’d agreed to stay awake, but she couldn’t find it in herself to wake him while he looked so peaceful and relaxed.

The loop of their characters cheering on the screen behind the updated ranking list went on, the music becoming background noise while she went through every social media feed on her phone, ignoring the increasing pressure in her bladder.

But more than a liter of energy drink had the power of two days’ worth of water, and it started to feel like it was trying to turn her insides out. She regretfully and carefully moved Hiccup’s head out of the way, immediately missing its weight on her shoulder and the warmth of his body leaning against her side.

Peeing felt like the liberation of France and she sighed in relief. Maybe she could be back before Hiccup woke up.

She wasn’t. When she came back from the bathroom, he was stretching on her bed, bleary-eyed and disarmingly cute with his messy hair, rubbing his eyes and face like a child.

“You broke a rule,” he yawned. “You didn’t wake me.”

“I didn’t notice you’d fallen asleep, doofus. I was in the bathroom.” She settled back on the blanket, making sure to leave a little space between them lest she got foolishly distracted by him again.

He reached over her to grab another energy drink and she could swear he was smirking. But when she eyed him properly, his eyes were big and innocent, a little red-rimmed from being tired and staring at a screen for so long. Choosing to forget the whole thing, she resumed the game.

[yesloverboy]

You and Michael playing PC games in the Sanctuary. Everything was okay until Michael decides to play the infamous "Cat Mario". That fucking fan made game that you can even past the first level. His rage level just explode with this game. I took inspiration from that youtuber named "Rooster Teeth".

listen y’all this is pure crack, but it was super fun to write. thanks so much for such a hilarious idea! 

…  

When Michael finally brought you to the Sanctuary, it was everything you dreamt it would be. Your new home felt like it existed on an entirely different plane of reality; a little slice of what you imagined heaven would be like, yet it was so much more. It was better than heaven, all because Michael had created it, and he created it just for you. It certainly wasn’t a complete picture of what yours and Michael’s new world would be, but for now, it was everything you could ever need to enjoy your victories and plan for the future.

 The Sanctuary itself was like an oasis in the desert, overflowing with lavish gardens, ornate palaces, and artful sculptures that were seemingly derived from all the rococo masterpieces you could recall from the previous Earth. The sun always shone brightly, and it only ever thunderstormed when you were tucked safely inside; a blanket wrapped securely around your shoulders and a book in your hands. 

 Best of all, Michael seemed relaxed, more relaxed than you ever remembered. The scowl he had adopted back in the Outpost had melted away, his mildly cherubic face becoming one of ease, the soft look in his eyes making your heart flutter. He still maintained his elegance– after all, he is the son of Satan and heir to Earth’s throne –but now, Michael was free to breathe a little. As the days went by, he became the playful boy you first fell in love with, indulging you in movie marathons, ruthless game nights, and impromptu dances in the kitchen. 

 As elegant as your Sanctuary was, it wasn’t long before you and your beloved ventured back into some of the more nostalgic creature comforts of your previous lives. You’re unsure how, but Michael managed to save the remnants of whatever the human race had left of the internet before the nuclear fallout. 

 On a particularly lazy day, you find yourself in Michael’s study, diving deep into the rabbit hole of PC games from your childhood. You’re halfway through Resident Evil 2, when Michael strolls in, the sound of him humming softly under his breath drawing your attention away from the computer screen. His hair is pulled back into a loose bun, and a pair of beige linen pants hand loosely on his hips. You smile to yourself as an image of Michael in crimson velvet flashes in your mind, and you feel proud of how much he’s let himself grow. 

 Sure, he’s still the antichrist, but now the darkness inside of him doesn’t have to fight for space anymore. There’s no good half or bad half, human or nonhuman– there’s just Michael. Your Michael. 

 “What are you up to, my love?”

 You open the game menu, pausing your progress for a moment. “Oh nothing, just rotting my brain with the old Resident Evil games. You remember these? God they used to scare the shit out of me.” 

 “Language, darling,” he teases, poking fun at your casual mention of the Lord Almighty. “Mind if I join you?” 

“I thought you’d never ask!” you giggle. “Now pull up a chair so I can kick your ass, pretty boy.” 

 Michael drags one of the plush lounge chairs over to the desk, all the while chuckling to himself. “Someone’s feeling feisty, today. Why don’t we find something we both can play? I wouldn’t want to inhibit my baby’s progress in her crusade against the undead.” 

 You playfully shove Michael as he flops down beside you, the chair squeaking against the wooden floor as he stumbles into it. “Hey, you don’t have to make up excuses, I’d be intimidated by my zombie-killing prowess, too.” 

 Michael just rolls his eyes, a coy smile tugging at his perfect lips. “Oh yeah, that’s definitely it. Now hurry up and pick something before I change my mind.”

 You save your progress on Resident Evil 2 and close its window, promptly opening your folder of games you filed away for later. You had all the classics: the rest of the Resident Evil series, Silent Hill, Doom, Super Mario Brothers, Super Mario World, and a few indie games you had yet to try. 

 “What about this one?” Michael asks, pointing to a game labeled Cat Mario.

 The game looks innocent enough. Based on appearance alone, it seems to be the exact format of a regular Mario game but just a little more homemade. Rather than having the adorable Italian plumber you know and love being the game’s main protagonist, a little white cat stands in his place. The instructions are in Japanese, but everything about it is virtually the same game– how different could it be?

 “Sure! I mean, I haven’t played it yet, but I would be lying if I said I didn’t love a good Mario rendition.” 

 “Game on,” Michael grins, “Why don’t you go first?” 

 You happily oblige, and select the only available stage on the colorful screen. It may not be a true Mario game, but the delightful pastel blue sky and white little clouds make you feel right at home. 

 The first thing you notice as you move the little white cat is how much slower everything is. No problem, you think. Maybe it’s just a little hiccup in the developer’s design. It is an indie game, after all, so you can’t expect it to be perfect. It isn’t until you reach the first green pipe that you realize something is terribly off about the whole thing.

 Rather than your adorable little cat character hopping inside and materializing through another pipe, the cat sinks within in and the pipe flies off the top of the screen, effectively wasting your first life. 

 “Whoa, what the fuck?” you look over at Michael, but his confused expression is just a mirror of your own. 

 “Yeah what the fuck is right,” he murmurs, “Are you sure you’re doing it right?”

 You scoff indignantly, “What do you mean, am I sure?”

 “Here,” he smiles confidently, “Let me give it a shot.” 

 Pushing yourself away from the desk, you allow the office chair to roll you out of Michael’s way, wondering what he could possibly do that would be any different from what you were trying. 

 Annoyingly enough, Michael gets farther than you did on your first attempt, quickly correcting every mistake he had observed you making. 

 “You know, the controls may be slow, but once you get the hang of it–” Michael starts, but is immediately cut off by the sight of a floating platform falling from the powder blue sky and onto the little white cat. 

 “Are you fucking kidding me?!” Michael growls, “That’s never happened in a Mario game before, has it?”

 Even though you’re just as perplexed as Michael, you can’t help but be amused by just how much he hates losing. “I don’t know, boy wonder. Has a green pipe ever flown off-screen in a Mario game before?”

 Michael just turns his attention back to the screen, his teeth clenched tightly in frustration. “Whatever, I’m trying it again.”

 This time around, Michael tries to make the cat jump and punch a question block, only for it to soar upwards and out of his reach. 

 “Please tell me you’re seeing this shit, and I’m not going crazy.” Michael whines. 

 “Oh you’re going crazy, alright,” you smirk, trying your best to bury the laugh that’s starting to bubble in your throat. 

 Michael continues on a little further, dodging green pipes and avoiding slow-moving enemies like the plague. You’re just about to tell him that he might be out of the woods when suddenly, the little white cat jumps up to hit a series of hidden blocks, only to be immediately boxed in by every single one of them. 

 You don’t have to look at him directly to know that his face is bright red with aggravation. In all the years you’d been with Michael, you’ve spent enough time with him to know that it’s taking him everything within his power not to smash the PC to bits with the wave of his fingers. 

 “This isn’t happening, this isn’t fucking happening.” Michael huffs, his eyes darting between the pastel-colored screen and your face, trying to gauge your reaction. “Listen, I’ve seen a lot of evil in this world– hell, I’ve done a lot of evil –but this is something else.” 

 You let out a hearty laugh and plant a firm kiss on his anger-flushed cheek. “Well, if it makes you feel any better, I’m sure that whatever internet troll invented this horrible thing probably perished in the blast.”

 “Kicking and screaming?” Michael inquires, a hint of humor returning to his velvety voice. 

 “Kicking and screaming,” you confirm, “Although, I can’t help but wonder what that kind of evil genius could have done for the new world…”

 Michael looks at an empty corner of the room thoughtfully, his brilliant eyes sparkling. “Well, we could always do a good old fashioned blood ritual later tonight…maybe bring the bastard back. You know, for old time’s sake.”

 You grin, feeling an overwhelming sense of affection for your competitive husband. He may be the son of the Devil, but he had all the competitive fire of a Greek God, scorned and beautiful all at the same time. 

 “It’s a date.”

[shigarakis-fifth-hand]

His Daughter; mha fanfiction

tw: cursing, abuse, smoking

Enjoy the series! one

Around the table sat four villains, all silent for the moment as they looked at each other. One with a hand on his face and blue hair, with horrible pale skin. Tomura Shigaraki, age 22. Next to him was a man who wore a butler suit and looked like a portal, but he had limbs and bright yellow eyes. Kurogiri, age unknown. Across the table was a woman with dark blue hair and a single streak of silver. She was younger than all of them, but much more intelligent and useful. Sakuya Ririko, age 17. The woman next to her was older, with a pink pixie cut. Kuriyama Tsukiko, age 39.

“Now, you weren’t exactly clear with your instructions. You just said-” Shigaraki put his hand up, interrupting the pink haired lady. “I know what I said, and if you had a brain cell you’d understand! I need a child who will impress my mentor! Forget it, this is stupid.” Shigaraki stood up, about to leave before Kurogiri grabbed his arm.

“Don’t be so quick to give up throw a tantrum Tomura... now we have many files here that would interest you. We found the best of the best for you, ranging from mental quirks to quirks that could possibly destroy an entire city all at once.”

Tomura turned around, looking at the young blue-haired girl who was speaking to him. “Now if you’ll look at the files, we have this 11-year-old boy first. His father was a pro hero who died and was placed in a foster family. His quirk is ice spike-” Shigaraki swiped the file away, as if to say ‘next’. 

“Well then... we have this boy who lives in Australia. His quirk is heat rays.” Shigaraki swiped it away, rolling his eyes. “No, you promised a child with a powerful quirk. Something new, something different. Everyone has some sort of fire or ice quirk these days, and I know that Endeavor’s child has both for that fact so no.” Shigaraki was about to step away again when she pulled out a third file.

On the front was a picture of a young girl with a large black eye, who could be no more than ten. “W-what’s with the black eye?” Kurogiri asked as the girl smiled sadly. “She developed her quirk recently. Poor thing was walking around and made the vase fall to the floor. Her father was... not happy as you can see.” The pink haired girl took the file as it caught Tomura’s attention.

An abused child...

“Mitsuku Mamoru. She just turned seven, and her quirk is to move things with her mind. The catch is that she must know what the thing looks like from a 360 view, or else she can only manipulate the part she sees. Like, if she only saw half an apple, she could separate the half from the rest and only control that half.” Tomura grabbed the file from her, reading it himself.

She had developed her quirk only two months ago, and was trying to use it. “I want this one. It’s perfect.” The girls smiled at the term it. “Now, what do we owe you?” Kurogiri asked as the girls smiled evilly. ‘Oh nothing at all. Just that when she turns 18, we get to meet her.” The pink haired girl responded as the blue hair girl spoke up.

“Kiriyama here adopted me into the system when I was seven too. It would be nice to see how she... turns out.” She smiled innocently, but the two men would not be fooled by such. “Anywaysss, how do we get the kid.” Shigaraki asked as the two girls giggled. “Oh right, almost forgot! Let me just-” The girl with the blue hair closed her eyes, immediately sensing the location.

“She’s in 136 at the Apartments on Kanako Road. She’s right... ah, there she is! She’s in her room in the back corner, on the side facing the pool. Can you get there Kurogiri?” She asked as he nodded, a portal forming on the side of the wall. “Move in, move out!” The pink haired woman told the younger girl as they walked in.

Looking past them, Shigaraki could see you sitting there, playing with your dolls as you stared at the girls with a horrified look. “Come here sweetie! We’re here to help you!” You stood up, holding onto a teddy bear tightly and sucking your thumb. “Good girl! Come here!” Shigaraki snickered at the fact that they were treating you like a dog. 

As he snickered, you met his bright red eyes. Without the hand on his face, you couldn’t help but stare at him. Shigaraki immediately noticed that he had peaked your interest.

“Mitsuku! Get your ass down here and tell me who moved my cigarettes!” A loud, booming male voice could be heard from downstairs, followed by the sound of someone walking up the stairs. Fearfully, you took one glance at the portal before running into it. You didn’t run into the arms of the girls, oh no. You raced towards Tomura, hugging your arms around his legs tightly.

“Woah, um.” Shigaraki stared down at you, and how small you were. You didn’t go above his waist. “Aww how cute.” The girls walked through the portal, letting Kurogiri close it. “W-where am I? Who are you?” You began to yell, looking around fearfully at your surroundings as your arms stayed tight around Shigaraki’s legs.

“Don’t worry sweetie. Don’t stress.” The pink haired woman opened up her palm as a small pink mist flowed out, flowing towards you. You wobbled on your feet, before falling on your back. Shigaraki used his shoe to make sure you didn’t hit your head.

“Your quirk is like Midnights?” Shigaraki confusingly asked, not sure what was happening. “Oh no, my quirk is much, much better. Her quirk can put people to sleep, while mine can alter their memories for the next hour. Whatever you want her to think, I’ll say it and she’ll replace that memory with the old one. Now, let’s go with this.” She leaned down towards your sleeping self, closing her eyes as she began.

“Your old father was a terrible man who was a pro hero and abused you terribly. Your father, Shigaraki,-” Shigaraki’s eyes widened at that sentence. He hadn’t realized what he had gotten himself into. “-had been in a fight with the villain, saw you beat up, and took you in once he killed your father like the good person he was.” The pink haired woman stopped with the mist as it disappeared. “Well then, gentlemen. She’ll be out for around 50 minutes so I’d get her back to the base and learn everyone’s names. No mentioning any names outside of the League though.”

The woman with the pink hair tried to explain, but Shigaraki wasn’t listening. “If she hears something that isn’t what she remembers, it won’t be good. It can lead to death if the brain decides to shut down after realizing it was altered. Now be careful about that.” Shigaraki waved away the girls, picking you up and swinging you over his shoulder to walk you into the alley and on your way to the hideout.

“Hmm, can’t wait to see what happens with that train wreck.” The girls chuckled, closing the doors as the guys and you left.

Walking into the League, they smiled at the empty place. Kurogiri had found it for cheap, and was planning on renovating it into the perfect place for their new League. So far, the only members were Kurogiri, Muscular, and then Shigaraki. All Might was in his prime, and you were the first step to build a League so great to stop that.

Shigaraki laid you down on the couch, walking away to the kitchen and getting lost in paperwork and, eventually video games. 

He was in the middle of Mario Cart, his OG favorite from when he was a kid, when you woke up, walking over and sitting next to him. At first Shigaraki didn’t notice, until he had to look twice and realize that there was a child next to him.

Your hair was dark black, and your eyes were bright red. You were short, and fairly tan for a child. Tomura was a small bit jealous. You were adorable though. “What do you want?” Shigaraki asked you as you cuddled up against his arm, not taking your eyes off the screen in front of you. Shigaraki tried to maintain his cool, even though he wasn’t the most familiar with such affection, especially from a young child.

“Can I play too Dad?” You asked, looking at him innocently. Shigaraki stopped moving, not caring if he was losing now. Looking into your eyes, he saw light, adventure, and comfort. “The hell...” He murmured to himself before you smiled at him. “Pleaaaaseeee?” You asked, smiling wide as he couldn’t help but feel confused. Every child that he had ever met had been terrified of his face or features.

He had greasy hair, ghost-white skin, dried lips, cracked skin, and scary red eyes with messy blue hair. Every child he had ever met had hidden away from him, or screamed.

Not you though, here you were smiling at him while wanting to play video games. The same thing had happened in your kidnapping. You had looked at him, and had run to him for safety, and not the two girls. Did you see him as comforting? Did you see him as... not scary? Normal maybe?

“Aren’t you scared of me? Of my face?” Shigaraki asked quietly, as you began giggling. “Of course not! Why would I be!? You have blue hair which I really want to braid, and you have red eyes like me! You’re really tall which is awesome because I can get on your shoulders, AND you play video games! I could only play video games at my friends’ houses!” You smiled, still looking at the controller to Shigaraki’s right.

“Now stop avoiding my question Mister! Can I please play Marie Cart?” You asked as Shigaraki melted at the mispronunciation of Mario Cart. You were too cute to say no to. 

That day, you and your new “dad” spent all day playing video games. You roasted him in “Marie Cart”, and he taught you how to play PubG. Of course, some would say that those types of video games were too violent. But you were being raised to be the best villain in the world, and you loved it!

“Hehe, look at my guy! He’s got a man bun.” You giggled, looking over at Tomura. “Can I do a man bun on you?” You asked sweetly, grinning as he hesitantly nodded. You smiled, taking a rubber band from your wrist and crawling to the other side of the couch and doing his hair.

“Wow! You look great!” You smiled, running to the other side to look at him. “Right? I think you look very handsome!” You grinned, and at that moment, Shigaraki saw you as the daughter he had never known he had needed.

You spent the next years together growing a bond unlike anything the two of you had ever had before. You had always needed a father figure, and he had always needed someone to love him for him. Your childhood involved him learning how to braid your hair, him teaching you how to play many sports, you learning how to cheerlead, and the League evolving as you did as well.

Eventually, you had to go out in public again when it was obvious you loved your new family. Shigaraki died your hair a light blue like his, and let you cut it to your shoulders. He also gave you a new name, a better name. One that didn’t remind you of your dark past.

Your name was Koji, Koja Shigaraki. Or Koja Hanako to the public of course.

As you grew up though, your father trained you harder than any child before. Harder than any Todoroki child even. Night and day you focused on evolving your quirk, making improvements, and evolving yourself. Why wouldn’t you? You were going to be All Might’s competitor after all. That’s the true reason why Shigaraki had gotten you after all.

He was going to train you into the villain’s world greatest weapon.

Better than any Nomu out there.

You would become The Greatest.

[make-it-mavis]

Homesick (Entry #25)

(cw: drug use, graphic descriptions of gore, blood, insects) ----------

01/11/88  11:01 PM

Hey.

I wanted more GC, and I wanted it quick.

For the first hit, though, I at least had the sense to wait and let my code settle back into place. Which sucked, big time. I came out of that first trip maybe a couple hours before the arcade opened, and I spent the whole work day in my den nursing the most brutal form of buff hangover I’d ever experienced. I had aches on my aches. It was like I’d done five full-body workouts with my guts full of rocks and my head in a vice.

Once the arcade closed, I actually fell asleep and stayed asleep, which was for the best. By the time I woke up the next morning, my body felt right again and my pupils had faded enough to be clear by quitting time, so Tapper wouldn’t be tipped off by an incriminating glow when I went to see him.

I did try to draw some portraits from memory during the day, but my brain was too fried for that to work. I had to wait until closing and chase down some Good Guys, ones that would probably cooperate if I told them what it was for. Whatever anyone thinks of me, everyone loves Tapper. Thankfully, I got one of Mario. Good ol’ plumber-pants sat still without much of a fuss.

Tapper was happy to receive the portrait, and I was happy to get paid. I smiled and waved and played along, before immediately going to break my promise again. I should definitely have felt bad about it, but I kinda didn’t. Nothing was more important to me than GC.

It’s really easy to fall in love with something that makes you feel the way I did in the last entry. 

After that, I ended up thinking that GC could do no wrong. I thought that if I could manage a steady, controlled diet of GC, sleeping away my sobriety between hits, I could make a new, happy life for myself inside my own head. Maybe that would seem sad to the losers stuck in the arcade. All they would see is my body lying around, only ever getting up to get more GC. Looking at it with the mind I have now, that is sad as hell, not to mention impossible, and something I can hardly believe I liked the idea of stooping to. But at the time, I was like one of those pining romantics, madly infatuated with my new lover. I loved GC. I could see nothing wrong with spending the rest of my life with it. I probably would have married it, if I could have.

It wasn’t long before the honeymoon ended.

My second hit started out very much the same as the first one, minus the arousal. Nothing seemed different at first, but I felt good. All my sick feelings had been sucked away and my mood was climbing, so I felt compelled to get up and stroll through the woods. If I remember correctly, it really was a fair bit of time before anything happened. Long enough for me to forget I’d taken any buffs.

Finally, I found something exciting. A tree’s bark shone in a particular, familiar way -- I went over to touch it, and found red stained across the palm of my glove, yet again. Beyond that tree, even more were the same. They reminded me of the cherry syrup, of course, so I followed their trail through the woods. They led me right up to the edge of the map, where the accessible forest cuts off, and the out-of-bounds forest stretches into darkness.

I wondered for a moment why I’d been led there. I couldn’t go any further, and even if I could, none of the trees ahead had any red on them. Uncertain, I inspected a red tree a little closer, and immediately sneezed. It didn’t smell like cherries at all -- it smelled like paint. All of them did, as I could suddenly smell strongly. How I missed that along the way, I had no idea. I’d been following paint splatters the whole time. Once I turned to look into the dark forest again, I jumped a bit.

The trunks that had been clean not seconds before were now splattered with a full spectrum of pungent paint. I took a moment to take it all in and wait for something else to happen, but nothing did.

Seeing how the paint led further into the dark, I figured it had to be another trail. I’d been trying for years to get through the edge of the map, so it seemed impossible to follow. But I stepped forward anyway.

There was no wall. I walked straight through.

I only took a second to look back before continuing on. I’d been standing around long enough, and I don’t think my impaired brain could comprehend the gravity of what I’d just done. 

The trail went on for a little while, until the darkness grew thicker. Curiously, the paint stayed just as clear and bright, but sank deeper towards the ground as I went, until it was just smeared under my feet. When I looked back to check out the colorful footprints behind me, I realized I couldn’t see the forest anymore. Apart from the paint and myself, everything was pitch black as far as I could see, in all directions. 

My gut sank and my head churned. I may have mentioned I’m not really a fan of endless dark. Part of me wanted to lower to the ground and find a way to hold onto it, but I was relieved to hear something.

There was movement. Some fabric shifting, some heavy breathing, some soft, wet sounds. My blood rushed for a moment -- finally, it was time to pick up where I’d left off the previous time. I followed the sound eagerly, and quickly found another smeared paint trail. After a surprisingly long time following it, I finally found what I’d been looking for.

A little ways off, I saw an unusual but familiar sight. It was me, very much the way I looked in the mirror during the last dream, only fully clothed. I was lying down, and I saw a shadow bent over me, but it didn’t look like it was alone. I wondered for a moment how weird it would get if I joined, but the longer I watched, the more I realized that something was off.

My face was turned away. I wasn’t panting, I was heaving like a fish on land. I couldn’t see the edges of the figures, but they still looked a whole lot bigger than the one in the first trip. That’s when I noticed one painfully obvious, crucial thing -- the paint trail led right up to my clone. There was paint all around her, and every color imaginable swirled in a lethargic way like droplets of oil on its surface. And beneath her, a pool slowly spread out from her body. It wasn’t just paint.

It was blood. 

The shadows were eating her alive.

My heart nearly stopped. I wanted to run, but I felt rooted to the spot. All I could do was sink into a crouch, covering my mouth in a desperate attempt to keep quiet. I couldn’t move, I couldn’t look away. I was forced to watch the ghostly monsters rip my look-alike into bite-sized pieces.

I heard fabric tearing and some sharp snaps. One of them had torn the lower half of one of her pant legs right down to her ankle, and had locked its jaws down on her calf, tugging hard. The others dropped what they were doing to dive in and fight over her leg, which shook the rest of her body like a ragdoll. They had been at her for a little while, it seemed. Paint spilled out of her open wounds as if from a broken jar, and as it did, the very color in her sprite seemed to drain out with it. She was gnawed within an inch of deletion. Heaping bites were taken from around her hip joint, eaten right down to the bone, all shredded and glistening in a garish rainbow. Her smock was torn right open, her tank top nothing but strings. There was a gaping hole chewed right through her white, wooden ribs, which were splintered outward like a broken cage. Through it, I could see a disgusting bulb of pink bubblegum that swelled and shrunk with her heaving breaths. Needless to say, the gore was a horrifying sight. Part of me was waiting for her belly to just fall apart and spill her gummy guts everywhere. But, honestly, the most harrowing sight for me was just a few simple cuts. 

Your name once again stretched across her chest, weeping fun colors that practically laughed in my face.

It was then that the careless jostling of her body flipped her head to face me. I had to clutch both hands over my mouth when I saw her.

Her face was golden, bent, punctured, misshapen, bleeding from a dozen scratches. The same face I saw reflected in my warped paint can, the day of the attack. All things considered, she seemed pretty calm for someone being eaten. Her eyes were squeezed shut, and she was sweating, seeming to strain from the effort of staying alive.

Then one of her eyes cracked open, and she saw me.

Her eyes went wide as saucers, filled with fright. They darted towards the shadows, then back to me, and her breathing quickened. Even with a twisted face, the urgency in her eyes screamed just as loud as any voice:

“What are you doing!? RUN, DUMBASS!”

Her leg tore completely free of her body at the hip, and I screamed.

The darkness burst to light. All of it, in all directions, woke into a blinding, humming white light that shocked my eyes for a second. When I adjusted, I saw them. Tall, white, splattered with paint, standing alert around the severed leg, each staring right at me, were dogs.

I bolted.

Vicious, metallic barking gave chase not a second after. My first instinct, one that I’d forgotten was no longer an option, was to fly away. When I grabbed my brush, however, rather than finding red, orange, and yellow, I found nothing. Just a normal, dry brush, out of an empty can. I couldn’t believe it. I ran as hard as I could, beseeching my body to please, please just freakin’ fly. They were almost right behind me, just about close enough to snap at my heels, and I had no idea where I was going. There was nothing. Endless, white void. 

Then, SPLAT. I quite nearly tripped at a splattering sound so loud, it might as well have been the beat of an enormous drum. I didn’t pause to look, but I found that I didn’t need to. The sound beat through the wide white world again and again, until the source spread into my line of sight.

Falling like raindrops the size of hulking boulders were globs of paint, all of them a mess of that infuriating red, orange, and yellow. When they hit the ground, they burst apart in a crashing splatter that colored the endless white like a canvas. The smell smacked into me like a brick wall, quickly reaching suffocating levels and making my vision blur with tears. I didn’t know what they meant, or how I was supposed to avoid them. I was just certain that one would fall directly on my head and break my skeleton into pieces.

Better than being eaten alive.

My worries were cut short. A drop fell not on my head, but right in front of me. I barely had time to see it. The next few moments came so quickly that my brain couldn’t even keep track of them.

The paint splash hit me like a full-body tackle. I was knocked back and fell hard. Before I could move, a dog drove its bony body down onto my gut, and… I don’t know how to explain it, but, just like that, we were falling. As if the force of its dive broke the ground under us. 

Everything went dark, and my scream echoed with a metallic twang. I suddenly found myself tumbling down what felt like a metal shaft, with sharp angles and corners that beat the absolute hell out of my body, all the while tangled up with a nearly skeletal monster that I hadn’t even seen up close yet. But I didn’t care what it looked like. I was more concerned with the claws ripping through my clothes and skin, and the teeth snapping wildly above my hands as I pushed its throat away from me.

Then, within seconds, we shot through the bottom of the shaft, and crashed into the ground hard.

Dog-first.

The thing just barely broke my fall. My whole body slammed flat against the floor. Being profoundly disoriented and beaten halfway to hell, I found it incredibly difficult to push back up off the ground. But in the few moments I had to take in my perceived reality again, I noticed a few things. 

One, the dog was gone. Its body wasn’t even there. All that was left was a huge splatter of white paint that soaked the front of my clothes, and a pair of hinged, golden jaws that looked like they might have been crudely cut from my brush cuff.

Two, I was in a weird, waxy, yellow room, and the walls ran with slowly dripping honey.

Three, there was a baseball bat lodged in the floor in front of me.

And four, barking was echoing through the hollow metal shaft above me. A second dog was on its way down, and I was right where it would fall.

I didn’t think. I just moved. With every ounce of strength I could muster, I leapt to my feet and grabbed onto the baseball bat, but that thing was stubbornly stuck. I planted my feet and yanked as hard as I could, and it shifted a bit, but not nearly enough. That barking was getting closer at a speed that spelled my doom. As far as I could tell, my very life depended on the stupid thing pulling free. So, I did the same thing I always do, and survived.

It all happened in a single second, in one fluid motion. I drove my foot hard into the floor that trapped the bat and finally yanked it free. The momentum whipped my body around and threw the bat behind my head into a loaded wind-up, the very moment that the horrid, snarling thing dropped down in front of me. It lunged at me, and a millisecond was just enough time to see a gaping, golden trap of jagged teeth and white fur stained with haunting rainbow blood, before I let my swing fly. I slugged that thing in the head with enough force to break those jaws apart at the hinges. Once more, its body burst into nothing but a pungent, white splash that sprayed me from head to toe. 

I killed it.

The room was silent. The scramble was over. My entire body quaked so hard, I thought I would crumple to the floor. Apart from the night I was attacked, I’d never been so shaken in my life. But there was a strange thrill to my adrenaline, too, a sort of moxie. I killed one of those monsters, two if you count the lucky fall. Once upon a time, I’d been tied up and at their mercy, of which they had none. This time, I could fight back. This time, they ought to have been scared of me.

For a time, the barking stopped. I knew there was a third still alive, and I had no idea if it was still after me or not, so I was loathe to let my guard down. But I let myself look around. 

The room was small. Big enough for a small sprite to live in, but still really small. As I mentioned, the walls definitely were yellow, but something in my head must have been knocked loose in the fall. For a few seconds, those yellow walls glitched and flickered a spectrum of crackling, blinding colors, pushing nails into my temples. As painful as it was, I didn’t think much of it. I’m not sure why.

I was in a beehive. If the honey wasn’t enough of a tell, there was a fat, fluffy bumblebee almost as big as me shivering in a corner, staring at me, clearly paralyzed with fear. 

They looked completely harmless. But I was nearly killed and not in a trusting mood. I backed up and gripped my bat tightly. I asked them, “Are we gonna get along or are you gonna try something stupid?”

They buzzed.

“I don’t speak bee. You nod, understand? I’m gonna ask you again, are we gonna get along?”

They nodded vigorously.

I thought about it for a minute, decided I could kill a bee with my bare hands if it came to it, and let up on my stance. “Well, alright then.”

Just like that, without another word, they crawled up the wall and burrowed through it, out of sight. I called after them once, but decided I didn’t care. Instead, I addressed the multiple points of stinging pain over my body. From that scuffle during the fall, my smock was torn in several spots, opening up windows to dirty, ragged claw marks that sent blood trickling down. There were a few on my biceps and chest, but the very worst of them curved over my shoulder and onto my back. 

The white paint splatters sure didn’t help the pain.

There wasn’t much I could do about the wounds, but I decided to ditch my smock. The way it hung on me might have gotten in the way if another fight came up. That’s just the way I was thinking.

That’s when I heard the click-click-click of a dog’s claws wandering around. It came from everywhere -- above, below, all around. It was the third dog. It had to be. I hadn’t killed it yet, and it got into the hive. I grabbed my bat and slowly backed around the room. I wanted to be ready for it, but I couldn’t even pinpoint where it was. I tried to harness that moxie again, that vengeful semi-bloodlust, but I was still anxious. To say the least.

“C’mon!” I shouted. “COME OUT!”

There was a waxy squeak, and a door split out from the wall. I let out a wild yell and leapt for it with a killing blow loaded. But it wasn’t a dog -- it was another stranger. I just barely caught myself before I could crack their skull in. It’s safe to assume they screamed, but, somehow, it sounded like silverware tumbling together.

I slowly lowered my bat and got a good look at them. They were another bug, an ant this time, all reddish-brown with an orange chest and black butt. Not as cute as the bee, which peeked out shyly behind them, but they didn’t seem all that hostile. They had all four weird “hands” up in a pacifistic way, and they were braced in a long stance, as if trying to keep their body as far away from me as possible. Once I eased up, they emitted a sound like someone scraping their knife and fork together.

“...Uh...huh,” I said, backing away from their extended hands. They were confident enough to advance a little bit, but I pointed my bat at them. “Now, you stay right the hell there. Not another step ‘til you tell me who you are. In English.”

They looked affronted for a second, and gestured to themself with a metallic squeak. Their sound-language was starting to piss me off.

“Oh, for Litwak’s-- I don’t understand metal, damn it. I don’t have time to-- Wait.”

I paused to listen to the nails clicking around again. The ant squeaked, but I shushed them. “Listen. Hear that?”

They shook their head.

“There’s a dog. There’s a dog in the hive,” I said, following the sound. “I took out the first two, but there’s still one more. It’ll come after me, so you’d best clear out if you know what’s good for ya. This is my--”

I saw it. Right behind the ant and bee, in the low lit corridor, it bent its spidery legs to stalk down low, and it looked right at me with a disgusting golden grin gaping wide.

“THERE!”

Everyone jumped, including the dog. It instantly scrambled, slipped, turned tail, and ran. There was no way in hell I was letting it get away. I lunged for the door, but I was blocked by the ant waving their arms in front of me. I rammed my foot into their gut and dashed past them in pursuit of the monster.

I followed its footfalls up a couple spiraling passageways, until they fell silent. I ended up in a corridor much like the one I entered below, although I took a moment to notice that the wax was quite thin at several points in the walls, with dim, warm light glowing through. Little rooms just like the first one, I figured. My cowardly opponent had to have been in one of them. 

Flipping my bat in my hands, I crept past the rooms. That aforementioned vengeful semi-bloodlust really began to boil over. I just yearned for the satisfaction of killing the thing that quite nearly killed me. It was an odd feeling. I’d never had the actual intent of killing something before, outside of self-defense. But I told myself that this thing would kill me if I didn’t kill it first, so, in a way, it was still self-defense, I figured. I hadn’t become unhinged. My actions were completely rational. 

So, feeling securely justified, I started whistling. “Here boy. C’mon out, now.”

I only stopped when I came upon a light that felt cold. The dog was just on the other side of the wax. I was sure of it. 

So, I hit a hole in the wax and kicked it through. Sure enough, it was there, arching its back hard into the corner. Finally, I actually got a solid look at it.

I immediately wished I hadn’t.

I didn’t see it so much as I felt it. Looking directly at it felt like squinting against dry, freezing air, and its pixels seemed to shudder and blur as if my very eyeballs were shivering. Its fur was a dead, icy white, stained in colorful blood. Every part of its body was long to the point of being grotesque. I could barely focus on its paws, but they looked far too long and bony, more like gnarled hands than anything else. Its face redefined hideous, and I was glad to not get a clearer image of it -- there were holes where ears should have been, a blank slope where a nose should have been, wide, quivering, pitch-black eyes over drooping lower lids, and, of course, those hinged, golden jaws. Calling it a dog was generous. It was no ordinary sprite, no creation of the Devs’. It was, in its entirety, wrong.

It was up to me to correct it.

“There you are, you spineless hellhound,” I sang as I advanced on it slowly. Staring at it felt like inhaling ice water, but I endured it to enjoy the sight of my fear so afraid of me. “Aw, you look so scared. Like you’ve seen a ghost,” I spat, “Spooky, huh? You gonna cover your eyes? Or, maybe you’d prefer to be blindfolded. Yeah, and then I can chew your legs off. You could even tell me your master’s name so I can cut it into your chest. How’s that sound?”

Its hand-like feet pushed and slipped against the honey-slicked floor. It visibly shook, blurring its pixels even more, while it let out a loud whine that was like rusty brakes.

“Oh, shut up,” I said. When it screeched more, I stomped. “I said shut UP! This is nothing compared to what you did to me. A sick, miserable monster like you doesn’t even deserve the mercy of a quick death, but every second you’re alive is a monumental waste of memory.”

Close enough to end it, I raised my bat, and with every ounce of venom in me, I said, “Now, get the hell out of my head, you filthy dog.”

A red-hot claw clamped on my right arm. I shouted and dropped the bat, which clunked to the floor, and the dog immediately bolted. I was angry, I was in pain, I was confused -- even more so when I twisted around to see the ant holding onto me. Only now, they had big red lobster claws in lieu of hands, one of which grabbed the bat and tossed it away. They weren’t squeezing hard, but the contact hurt in a way I didn’t understand until I kicked them away from me. 

“Why the hell did you do that?! Why’d you protect that thing!? Who are you?!”

They rattled in response, but I froze. Everywhere on my arm that had made contact with their claw was sharply tingling. I was conscious enough to remember how being touched makes me feel, but this was so, so much worse.

In a ring around my forearm, there was a dense team of tiny ants. Burrowing under my skin.

Naturally, I screamed. 

“What-- WHAT THE HELL?! WHAT DID YOU DO!? WHAT DID YOU DO TO ME!?”

I ripped my glove off and intervened. I dug my nails in as hard as I could and scratched. The ant came at me again, but I ordered them to keep away from me, maneuvering away as I had to. Every second, I could feel all of their tiny pinchers cutting away at my insides and digging deeper. The feeling alone made me want to throw up.

Finally, my skin broke and peeled away like plastic wrap. I ripped all the way around the ring and, without pausing to look, shook all the bugs out. They went flying around the room and disappeared into the honey. I stood there, panting, my mind sort of rattled, my head starting to seriously ache.

“Devs, my head… Listen,” I said to the ant, “I don’t care who you are, what game you’re from, or if it will get you unplugged. If you do that to me again, I will tear your skinny limbs off and bleed you out. You hear me?”

They nodded quickly. 

“Damn straight.”

Even with the bugs gone, my arm still hurt in a different way. I had clawed into it, after all. But when I looked at it, I didn’t find blood. I found feathers. Shining, red feathers pointed out of my skin. I’ll admit that I got a little excited. I picked a bit more at the ripped skin, and, sure enough, more feathers unfolded. I could feel them under my skin, all over, if I squeezed and prodded. They slipped around under my touch.

“Hey,” I said, chuckling weakly and lifting my arm. I found that I could fan the feathers up and down just by tensing my muscles. I pointed to it and looked at the ant. “How cool is this?”

Then I turned my hand around, and my palm caught my attention. There was a rip across the fabric of my glove, and a single red feather unfolded from a slit in my skin.

That’s around the time that things turned upside-down.

The pain in my head spiked so hard, it felt like a stake slowly driving into my skull. My vision cut in and out with crackling binary, until it gave one hard flash, and my surroundings made a sudden, staggering shift. In a split second, I found myself outside the hive, as if I’d teleported. 

Really, I’d just lost a chunk of time.

My heart was pounding, though I wasn’t sure if it had been from exertion or adrenaline. I had no idea how I went from there to wherever I was. But I stood before a disgusting sort of marvel. There were hills and hills of rotting fruit as far as I could see, all of which was crystalized, looking almost candied. Up above, the sky was nothing but a sea of shifting, buzzing flies, shimmering like polished pebbles.

I paused and looked at my arms, some feathers poking from holes that weren’t there before. I wasn’t sure what was happening to me, and I didn’t have my bat anymore, so I was a bit wary of moving forward. With nothing else to do, I found myself walking anyway. The rocky fruit clicked together under my feet in a very unstealthy way, and part of me wondered if I’d wake a garbage-dragon protecting their garbage hoard. That’s when I heard something.

Dragon or not, there was a sprite somewhere. I heard fruit clicking and snapping over a hill, and a deep rumbling sound similar to a mug sliding across a countertop.

That’s all I saw of the rotten hoard.

There was another stabbing pain, another flash, and I lost another chunk of time. 

Next thing I knew, my vision was cutting in and out. I was screaming something, but it was too choppy to remember. The main thing I remember is that I felt the bugs again, over every inch of me from the neck down. I was on the floor, I think, thrashing and scratching.

Flash.

I was back in the hive, in another small room with the same ant from before. I was standing on what could only have been a table. I was panting a bit, and the ant was a safe distance away, also winded, as if we’d just had a chase around the room. They squeaked and scraped a bit louder than they had been before. I still didn’t understand a word they said.

I was clutching my arm, holding it up for them to see. More and more of my skin had been pulled back over feathers, and, remarkably enough, my fingers were curled into pearlescent, white bird claws.

I shouted something. I don’t remember what.

Flash.

I had a blanket over my shoulders. My fingers were bare, cold, and slick. There was a destroyed piece of cherry pie on a plate in front of me, and I was enjoying the feeling of its insides on my skin instead of eating it. 

I think from here on in the dream, my brain really started to shut down. I got pretty stupid and embarrassing, and, honestly, I don’t think I absorbed a whole lot of what was said to me, or even what I said. There are hard-lined blips of dialogue that are just missing from my head. I’ll cut them out as they happen, moving forward. 

I only caught the tail end of myself telling what felt like a long story.

“--and two fingers in here, comparing side by side with your eyes closed, I promise you couldn’t tell the difference.”

I was looking at Fix-it. Plain ol’ Fix-it. I was in his plain ol’ apartment. Apart from a few things knocked over, everything was where it should have been for a moment.

Fix-it sat across from me at the table, his hair a mess, his eyes rimmed red from either crying or lack of sleep. He leaned his cheek heavy into his palm and seemed to be fighting with all his might to keep his eyes open. There was coffee in front of him, but I got the impression that it had gone cold.

I was very disoriented. I had been facing down an ant mere seconds ago, as far as I could tell. I had no idea how I ended up there. Part of me wondered if it was real. I wondered if Fix-it was real. I squinted at him, as if I could read his code if I tried really hard.

“Fix-it, is that you?”

His eyes drooped. “Mm-hmm.”

I just stared at him, surprised at his tiny response. I actually found it a little unnerving.

“Fix-it, wake up. You’re creepin’ me out.”

His eyes opened, and he studied me for a second. With a defeated sigh through his nose, he asked, “What’s your name?”

“Uh, Make-it Mavis, weirdo?”

At that, his face turned hopeful, and he straightened a bit. “Do you know who I am?”

“The Hammerhead. Duh. What’s the matter with you?”

He held his chest and thanked the Devs for a moment. My head throbbed, and for a second, his sprite flickered in every direction. He reformed with black eyes and pinchers for a frame, then creepy bug arms, then he was covered in ants, and then he was just himself again. I took a deep, steadying breath, wanting to ask the very programming what the hell that was.

“Okay, Mavy,” he tried to smooth his hair, and spoke carefully, as if this wasn’t his first attempt. “Can you tell me… what you remember about this evening?”

The question seemed easy, but the answer was slippery. I sucked my teeth, pinched my brow and wracked my brain. “I was just… there was an ant. They were trying to ---------- had a sort of, like… bird hand.”

He nodded slowly. I continued.

“They put bugs ---------- tore them out. I somehow ---------- of dead fruit and a sky full of flies. I had a monster dog cornered--”

I jolted up. “The dog! It got away! Where’s my bat!?”

“Mavy, Mavy, Mavy!” He lifted slightly from his seat, hands up. “It’s okay! It’s okay. Please, stay seated. Relax.”

“No! No, no no, I can’t relax! There were three, and only two are dead!” I gripped the table, my bones rattling. “The last one’s ----------! It wants my color!”

Fix-it paused. “Your… color?”

“My color! The color in my veins!”

“Your blood.”

I flew into a sort of panic induced rage. “My COLOR! They eat color! The entire kaleidoscope’s inside me! Don’t ----------?! I am color! I AM COLOR, DAMN IT!”

“Mavy, listen to me carefully, okay? Just take deep breaths,” he said softly and clearly. It seemed to me that he’d been saying that a lot that night. “You’re safe. You’re in your own game. You’re with me, and I’m not gonna hurt you. Okay?”

“No,” I said, and snatched up the fork next to my plate. “Just look -- this is what they want!”

He jumped to his feet. “Oh-- Mavis, no, no, don’t!”

I slammed my left hand down onto the table and drove the fork into it. It was like stabbing into a thick, dense steak that spit buttery juices. There was no pain at all.

Fix-it squealed in alarm. He rushed over, but I stuck my foot out. “You keep away from me! Look with your eyes!”

“Mavy, you’re bleeding!”

“I know! Look!”

I yanked the fork out of my hand and held it up for him to see. Looking like a peculiar bite mark, a neat row of holes spurted yellow and orange paint that ran down my arm.

“You see?!”

Then it just turned red.

Flash.

[violetsmoak]

Pieces of April [15/?]

AO3 Link: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21099044/chapters/50202530

Summary: On the anniversary of his death, Jason’s second life takes an abrupt new turn and he’s faced with a challenge that neither Batman nor the All-Caste prepared him for.

Rating: PG-13 (rating may change later)

Author’s Note: Here's your daily reminder to stay inside, wash your hands and not to hoard toilet paper! As a reward, enjoy another chapter of POA, featuring sass, subtle and not so subtle inklings of romance, and off-screen appearance of another Bat!

First Chapter

________________________________________________________________

After two movies and being so distracted that Ives kicks his ass at Mario Kart, Tim returns to his apartment. It’s not very late in vigilante time—two o’clock, as promised—and he’s sort of half expecting Jason to be still awake when he gets back.

The older man is sitting on the couch in the living room, flipping absently through the channels, eye flicking to the baby-monitor beside him every few seconds like he’s prepared to jump into action if he hears a cry.  

“Has she been keeping you up?” Tim asks as he strides over.

Jason blinks blearily at him. “No.”

“Then why don’t you grab some sleep while you can? There’s no point staying up if you don’t have to.”

“First of all—fuck you. Second of all, that’s rich comin' from the family insomniac. And third, I’m havin' trouble shuttin' my brain off, okay? It’s still tryin' to figure out if I didn’t accidentally travel to another alternate reality of something.”

A sharp, distorted cry echoes over the monitor and Jason really does jump.

“Stay put,” Tim tells him, already heading for the stairs. “I’ll get her.”

It’s still surprising when Jason listens to him, which Tim puts down to being in a desperate situation. He hopes that having someone else in the apartment to help with Isa will diminish whatever anxiety has the older man wound so tight.

Once upstairs, Tim slips into the guestroom and scoops her into his arm, wincing at the shrill squealing cry. After a quick check of her diaper—blessedly empty—he carries her still crying form downstairs to prepare a bottle for her.

Jason winces when they appear and—he doesn’t really run away, but he makes a hasty exit over the stairs.

Tim huffs under his breath. “It’s not like she’s a bomb, Jason. Geeze.”

Though she is doing an excellent job imitating a percussion grenade while they wait for the bottle of formula to warm up in the microwave, so maybe there are some similarities.

“It was thirty seconds, not thirty years, calm down,” he grumbles as she latches onto the plastic nipple like a starving animal.

He watches her nurse for a few minutes, brows furrowed and mind on Jason.

I know he’s still adjusting, but at some point, it’s got to start sinking in, right? I mean, he’s not even planning on keeping her, it’s all temporary, so there’s no reason for him to be this out of it.

Unless there’s more going on than just a surprise baby—which, given Jason’s past and present activities, could very well the issue.

I wonder how hard he’d punch me if I suggested he talk to someone about this?

Not Dick, obviously; calling him has always been one of Tim’s major avenues of support when he’s going through hard times, but he knows Jason would rather crawl through broken glass than open up to his predecessor.

Sometimes I think Jason’s relationship with Dick is a hundred times more complicated than it is with anyone else in the family…

Isa gives a dissatisfied whimper and turns her face away from the bottle. Tim frowns, seeing that she’s barely drunk a quarter of it, and tries to tempt her to take another, but she refuses, already going dozy and limp with sleep.

“Really? After all that? You raise holy hell and you don’t even finish it?” He snorts. “You really are his.”

It’s an effort to get the sleepy infant to burp, but he manages it; she passes out before he’s even made it back up the stairs and back to Jason’s room.

Despite having explicit permission to enter without knocking, Tim’s still uneasy broaching Jason’s personal space. Especially since Tim can tell he’s not asleep, even if he’s lying on his bad, holding a pillow over his face like he’s trying to block everything out.

Tim carefully arranges the baby back in her basket-bassinet, and quietly asks Jason, “Need anything else?”

Jason mutters something that sounds suspiciously like "Another life", and turns his back on both Tim and the baby.

And really, what can he even say to that?

It’s a problem for some other time.

Tim takes a quick shower, before faceplanting onto his unmade bed. The exhaustion he’s been ignoring for the past day or so finally hits him, and he passes out without even getting up to turn off the lights.

By some miracle, he gets six hours of uninterrupted sleep before his alarm goes off later that morning. He doesn’t feel fully rested, but he gave up on chasing that sensation two Robins ago.

After dressing and taming his hair (it might be time for a haircut soon), he spends an extra ten minutes checking the bruises on his face—they’ve gone from dark purple to blue—and applying a liberal amount of cover-up. A beat later, he adds a bit of eyeliner as well, to give an appearance of alertness that he doesn’t quite feel.

Heading downstairs his nose twitches as he becomes cognizant of an unfamiliar smell.

Of...someone’s cooking?

He finds Jason in his kitchen, flipping pancakes. The baby carrier is in the middle of the kitchen island, Isa sleeping soundly in a cocoon of blankets.

Instead of asking Jason why he’s cooking, Tim grabs a coffee cup from the cupboard and turns on his Keurig. “How was the first night?”

He doesn’t expect Jason to respond beyond irritated grunting, and so is surprised when he answers.

“Took me an hour to fall asleep,” he says. “Then at four she woke me up…then at six…and then just now. So, I decided, screw it, I’m hungry anyway. And about the only thing you have all the ingredients for are pancakes.” He shoots Tim a judging look. “I don’t even think you have maple syrup. It’s a disgrace.”

“I think there might be corn syrup in the pantry?”

“Disgrace,” Jason repeats.

Tim ignores him and glances at the two dozen pancakes he’s caught sight of behind Jason’s bulk. “Exactly how many people are you feeding?”

Something that might be a blush darkens Jason’s cheeks.

“I may have gotten a little distracted,” he admits defensively. “But I needed something mindless to do and it worked, so just…shut up and eat.”

He shoves a plate with three pancakes at Tim, who doesn’t have the heart to tell Jason he doesn’t really eat breakfast. Instead, he goes looking for the much-maligned corn syrup and takes the smallest pancake he can find in the bunch.

It’s only polite, after all.

Isa starts to whimper again and Jason groans. “There is no way you’re hungry again, I just fed you.”

Instead, he carts her over to the coffee table—the vintage Henredon table Tim actually spent a couple of weeks tracking down because it resembled one his parents had when he was a child—has since yesterday seemingly become the chosen changing station. 

There are piles of fresh diapers and wipes spread out on it, clearly from earlier changes, and there’s a pail next to it, along with the detritus of the packaging it was in.

“That can’t be sanitary,” Tim says. “Or environmentally friendly.”

“Yeah, well, your highness can shell out for cloth diapers and hire a service to clean them if that’s your issue.”

Tim rolls his eyes but wisely doesn’t reply to that, instead busying himself with finishing off the giant pancake and a much-needed cup of coffee.

“Ugh,” he hears Jason say after a while. “Are we sure this is a human child? Because what’s coming out of her doesn’t look human.”

Tim chokes on a large lump of pancake and glares across the room. “Yes, thanks for that while I’m eating.”

“As if your stomach hasn’t been tested by many a murder scene.”

“Never while I was eating,” Tim grumbles and pushes his plate away. He hunts down a travel mug for his second much-needed cup of coffee and then grabs his messenger bag from the hook on the door.

He’s halfway headed for the garage when he pauses and considers Jason again.

“Do you need me to stay?” he asks. “I mean, it’s the first day you’re doing this, so—”

“I don’t need you holding my hand, Drake,” Jason deadpans, “especially since you’re not going to be here during the day anyway. No point in getting used to a crutch.”

Tim isn’t sure he likes that comparison.

“You sure?”

“I figured out how to defuse bombs, I can figure this out.”

“Okay…but Safiya did give you her number, right? You know there’s no shame in calling her if you’re stuck.” That earns him a withering glare. “Just saying.” He offers Jason a mock-salute. “Enjoy learning how to baby.”

“Fuck you.”

“Language!”

“She’s two days old, she doesn’t know what the hell I’m sayin’.”

“A-plus childcare, Mary Poppins,” Tim mutters—under his breath because he doesn’t actually want to be punched this early in the morning—and finally leaves.

Once at the office, he falls into his usual routine—perfunctory greetings to people he should only know by sight but for whom he has done extensive background checks, sitting in a board meeting and chewing out the legal team for not filing their water-filter patent faster (he may have brushed it off to spare people the wrath of Damian, but he fully understands the kid’s anger), a stop at the break-room for a third cup of coffee and to keep an ear out for the office gossip.

Tam is waiting in his office when he finally settles in for the rest of the morning.

“How’s everything going at home?” she asks, closing the door behind her. She hands him his schedule for the day and a checklist of phone calls to return and products that require oversight.

“As well as can be expected,” he replies, sipping his coffee. “It’s an adjustment.”

“No kidding. You go from single, introvert shut-in bachelor to living with Dream Daddy overnight.”

Tim promptly inhales and then spits out very hot coffee, only narrowly missing a stack of contracts that need reviewing.

Tam’s eyes flick to the mess. “I’m not cleaning that up.”

“Why would you say that?” he splutters as his brain frantically tries to reboot after the shock.

“Because it’s not my job to clean up after the functional man-child that is my boss?”

“Not that.” He glares. “Filling my brain with disturbing notions.”

“Is the disturbing notion that I said it, or that you know what Dream Daddy is?”

“The disturbing thing is that you think my—” He pauses, hesitant to use the word ‘brother’ in relation to Jason, if only because it feels wrong for some inexplicable reason. ‘Friend’ is also a gross over-estimation of their relationship. “—new roommate is attractive.”

“Well, some of us have eyes,” Tam shrugs.

“And some of us have criteria for what we find attractive beyond looks.”

“Right. Forgot. You like the dangerous types that try to kill you first and ask questions later.”

Tim opens his mouth to object, and then tilts his head to one side to acknowledge it: given his recent dating history, she’s not wrong. “You forget that type tends to be female. As in something my new roommate most definitely is not.”

“Puh-lease, I’ve seen you when you’re hanging out with Connor. You can’t tell me that’s a hundred percent platonic.”

“It is!”

“If you say so,” Tam replies. “But you forget—I’ve kissed you. And I’ve never felt less spark or even interest in a guy before.”

“Because I was surprised,” Tim grouses. “That doesn’t mean I don’t like women. You’ve met Stephanie.”

“Yeah, but she told me she hit you in the face with a brick the first time you two met.”

“I regret ever introducing you to each other,” Tim groans, pressing his face into his hands. “Look, you’re the one who decided us dating would be a bad idea, so don’t go taking that as evidence that I’m gay.”

“First of all, our dating would be a bad idea, and not even just because of the inevitable involvement of ninjas or Vicki Vale’s byline. I’ve already explained why—which you agreed with at the time. And second of all, I never said you were gay, I said you had a type. Lynx tried to break you with a sword, Connor broke your arm, and as I said, there was Steph…Point is, gender has nothing to do with it, you’re just a masochist.”

“I must be since I put up with you,” he sighs. “Let me be clear: I have no interest, nor will I ever have interest in…my new roommate. And this is so far from the appropriate place to talk about this stuff.”

“And he pulls the ‘boss’ card,” Tam narrates sarcastically. “Fine, I’ll leave it alone. For now. Only because I have a conference call with my opposite number in Hong Kong.” She heads out but can’t resist throwing an over-dramatic sigh over her shoulder. “Maybe if I had the ability to throw you through a wall, you and I would have had a chance. Guess we’ll never know.”

She opens the door to the office, and then she’s gone, leaving Tim to parse the utterly bewildering turn to the conversation.

“How did we even get on that topic?” he mutters to himself, searching his desk for his glasses.

God, she can never find out that Jason tried to kill me that first time we met. I’ll never hear the end of it. Even if she’s completely wrong about all this, I’ll have to deal with knowing looks the rest of my life…

Tim makes a valiant effort to lose himself in his work after that, if only to erase the memory of Jason being called ‘daddy’ by another adult. He cleans up his desk as best he can, wrinkling his nose at the idea the place is going to smell like stale coffee for a while, and then does a quick triage of what work needs to be done now and what can wait.

He manages to lose himself for a few hours, working even through lunch, before setting aside time to wrestle with the current problem in his life: namely, helping Jason find someone to step in and deal with the baby situation.

It’s not like a business deal or falling stock options. A human being doesn’t come with cheat codes or hacks.

Well…not directly.

Tim grins to himself and opens an encrypted server to access to the CPS servers. Jason’s adamant about not working through the system, but that doesn’t mean they can’t investigate families within the system on their own and outside of whatever arbitrary criteria individual caseworkers use to evaluate potential parents. It’s a starting point.

At the same time, he’s using his personal computer that’s linked in with the Nest system to add a few extra layers of protection to Jason’s falsified information. It’s a fairly routine task, but he wants to ensure no one realizes he’s there.

His screen freezes.

 O: Do I need to know why you suddenly needed to hack the SSA?

 “Almost no one,” Tim corrects himself with a sigh; of course she’s keeping tabs on him.

He types a quick reply:

 T: You mean you don’t already?

O: No. I’m waiting for you to be upfront about it.

 That would be a definite change from the usual Bat modus operandi. He wonders how long it’s going to last.

 T: Precautionary alias for a case.

O: I see.

T: You know if it was anything more than that I’d have reached out.

O: Even if it involves a certain red sheep of the family?

 Tim groans, and only just refrains from pressing his palms against his eyes in frustration. Babs’ stance on Jason isn’t exactly clear, and she’s just as likely to give Bruce a heads-up about possible Red Hood antics coming up as wait for him to figure it out himself.

 T: Even then. This is a personal thing and I’m handling it.

O: Alright. I’m giving you the benefit of the doubt.

O: For now.

 Which Tim knows from experience will only last for so long; any potential threat in Gotham—and Jason is still occasionally classified as one of those—and Oracle might just take a page out of Batman’s mitigation playbook.  

“Problem for another day,” he tells himself.

He’s starting to feel like that’s going to become his new mantra.

⁂ ⁂ ⁂

Your feedback matters! I want to know what you think of my story, so feel free to leave kudos, a comment or as many of these emojis as you want and let me know how you feel!

❤️️ = I love this story! 😳 = this was hot! 💐 = thank you for sharing this 🍵 = tea spilled 🍬 = so sweet and fluffy! 🚔 = you’re under arrest! the writing’s too good! 😲 = I NEED THE NEXT CHAPTER 😢 = you got me right in the feels 🤯mind blown 🤬god damn cliffhanger 😫 whyyyyyyy?!?!?

Next Chapter

[bards-witcher]

Perdita - Chapter 1 (OhmToonz)

So nothing new today I’m afraid, but I’m going to try and work on a couple of things over the week and hopefully have something new out Thursday/Friday.

So technically this is the first BBS fic I ever wrote, the story is the same, but I’ve since rewritten it in my current writing style and actually plan on finishing it XD

Originally I was just going to edit the original version, but I think it works as a nice side by side comparison at how my work’s developed over the last 6 months, so find the original version here.

If this is something you guys like and want I’ll happily upload the rewritten chapters here, otherwise I’ll put them up on ao3 and just link the finished fic for those interested.

Just be warned for Violence and Death

Next

.

[Ohm POV]

He stared down the scope of his sniper rifle, every fiber of his being wanting nothing more than to drop the gun and run away, but no matter how hard he tried to move, to even flinch his fingers, he couldn’t. He was nothing more than a spectator to his own body’s actions.

Since he’d been taken, he’d been forced to watch himself shoot and torture an endless amount of people, no matter how much his mind screamed at himself to stop, still his body followed through with the orders, all with the promise that one day his body will be his own again.

Today was that day, but after watching the ever-growing river of blood he’d been forced to spill, he wasn’t sure he wanted his body back, knowing he’d be unable to go back to any semblance of his old life when all was said and done.

He’d known his final target since that first day, the most threatening gang leader in Los Santos, and his husband. 

Luke was in charge of a small but very powerful gang, one that despite all odds, still managed to rule over the city, with his new boss getting ever more frustrated with every passing day he heard about the BBS.

He fondly looked back on when he used to be one of their frontmen, when he and Luke would rule together, both complimenting each other in ways that meant the only option was success.

The fact that he’d been forcibly taken and watched as the BBS slowly became into disarray, losing territory they’d previously held for years whilst he was unable to go and help them was only another bullet in the wound.

In some of his darker moments, he’d remember back on some of his happier memories with his friends. Like the time they’d set up a huge Mario Kart tournament in the base and you could hear Anthony rage from down the street. 

The time that he and Moo had made Christmas cookies for the group, resulting in them almost having to pull out their guns to stop the absolute carnage that ensued when the others found them. 

How he trained with Smitty in hand to hand combat for days, supporting the younger man even as he kept getting discouraged by his seeming lack of progress, and celebrating when the other man finally managed to flip him onto the ground, shouting YEET in the process, whatever that meant. 

When he spent long nights in the Infirmary, clinging onto the man he loved who he’d been told wouldn’t make it through the night, hoping he could heal him through soft touches and promises of love and how when Luke finally woke, the kiss they shared could make even the devil himself blush.

It was with that thought that he felt his arm cock and his body’s position change, bringing his awareness back to the horror show that was currently his life now.

He saw a black SUV pull up on the street across from him, forced to watch through the scope as he saw the driver get out to open the door for the man sat in the back.

Luke

He felt his heart miss a beat when he saw him, tears already threatening to form as he mentally screamed at the other man to leave, to get back in the car and turn back, to save himself.

As he watched Luke casually talk with the driver, the older man unknowing of his fate, he tried everything he could in an effort to move himself, to twitch his eye, knock his arm off course, anything that would mean the man in front of him would survive, but no matter how hard he tried, his body remained stoic and relaxed.

He knew his record, he’d never missed a shot, which is why he’d been targeted for this job in the first place, that, and because his boss was as sadistic as they come, getting far too much joy at the thought of him killing the person he loved most.

Still, he kept trying to move, but was helpless as he felt his finger tighten on the trigger until he heard Luke laughing, it was his favourite laugh, the one that was light and warm and could always chase away the cold on those nights when he could feel the darkness start to creep into his bones.

Luke, I love you. Forgive me.

He felt more than heard his gun being fired, feeling his tears already begin to fall as he saw Luke crumple in front of him, a streak of blood following him down the car as he collapsed onto the ground.

The sight made him want to scream about how unfair the world was, to jump off of the building or press the barrel of his own gun against his head so that he could join the fate of the man he loved, but as always, his body refused to do anything he wanted.

He’s thankful when his body wasted no time looking at the gruesome scene in front of him, instead turning to put his gun away in its case before standing up to walk through the roof door he’d propped open and make his way back down the building.

When he reached the ground floor he found his boss waiting there to meet him, a smile wide on his face whilst a hand grasped onto his shoulder and gave it a tight squeeze, no mistaking the joy on the other man.

What he wouldn’t give to be able to kill him right here and now, to wrap his hands tight around his throat and watch as the light left his eyes, or to keep him locked up for hours to do as pleased for hours on end to at least make up for the hell his life had become.

“You’ve done well, and as promised you get your freedom back,” He couldn’t help but sneer internally at the comment, plans already forming in his mind of the torture he planned to inflict on the other man “Maybe in the future we could work together again”

He couldn’t help but grimace at the offer, why on earth the other man would even think he’d willingly work with him again was beyond him, but a chilling thought ran through him that he’d be taken again and forced to do his bidding, that he wouldn’t ever truly be free again.

“Oh, and in case you’re thinking of going back to your precious gang again, I’ve let them keep your boytoy’s body, within the hour they’ll find your bullet at the back of his brain so I recommend you get a head start before they start hunting you down.”

The other man’s booming laugh echoed in the room and in the next moment he felt himself get knocked in the head, unable to do anything, he simply opened his arms to embrace the vast emptiness of unconsciousness.

[eeveedel]

I’m a huge goner for meet cutes and for awkward/shy Harry, can we have a lil snippet on when they first met?

you sure can! (from my ongoing thick alpha au) this is all cute fluff but unedited so my apologies lol 

–

Niall’s New Year’s Eve party was packed, which Louis had sort of expected, but it didn’t make it any less headache-inducing.

His friend’s house was packed with people he barely recognized, all holding drinks and congregating around ping pong tables like they were still in undergrad. Louis rubbed his temple as he looked around. Niall had really twisted his arm to get him to come out tonight, and then the host had promptly ditched him, and Louis had lost Liam and Zayn in the fray. Liam was probably to sell his new pyramid scheme supplements to some poor unsuspecting party goer, the bastard.

Louis tipped his cup towards his mouth and cursed when only a thin stream of punch and vodka met his tongue. He would need at least ten more of these to get through the night.

Louis turned, ready to go into the kitchen and get another mixed drink, and then, to top off his night, he collided straight into another body. He felt his shirt become wet a second later, and he cursed when he looked down to see an amber stain marring the white fabric.

“God, fuck!” Louis hissed, pulling the shirt away from him, “This is a new fucking shirt, watch where you’re going!”

“Jesus, I’m so, so sorry,” the person who had just crashed into him said, “I’ll try to help you clean it, I – “

“No, don’t fucking bother,” Louis spat out, “Jesus Christ, did you not – “

He looked up, ready to glare down whoever this person was, and then he felt his throat stop working.

The person in front of him was an alpha. That much was obvious from…well, just about everything about him, but also the scent Louis was now becoming very aware of.

He was also cute, was the thing, really fucking gorgeous. He had curly hair down to his shoulders, a big, concerned pair of green eyes and a sweet, round face. And he was tall. Tall enough Louis had to crane his neck a little to look at him.

He was also kind of heavy, which is something Louis only registered after he was somewhat able to process this strange alpha’s height and pretty, bright eyes. His face was round, but so were his arms, which his short sleeves seem to almost strain against, and the now-empty cup he was holding was nearly dwarfed by his big, meaty hand. He had a sizable beer gut under this grey t-shirt, and his dark jeans held tight to his big thighs.

Louis didn’t know why, exactly, but the sight of it all made his entire body heat up.

“Are you okay?” the alpha asked, and Louis blinked.

“Yeah. Uh,” Louis said, “I – I’m great.”

“Oh,” the alpha said, “You just went quiet there for a second.”

“Uh. Yeah. My bad,” Louis said, and shifted his feet. He was somewhat aware his shirt was still very wet and very stained, but his brain was elsewhere now.

He tucked his hand in one pocket and stuck out his hip, batting his lashes a bit.

“I’m really sorry,” Louis said, “I overreacted. I think I had a bit too much to drink, you know, can’t think straight.”

He hoped his general gaze and stance also indicated to the alpha that he was not straight, ever.

The alpha just nodded, still looking a bit wounded.

“I’m really, really sorry about your shirt,” he said. “I, uh, I have a shirt in my car, I think, I can get you something else to wear. It’s the least I could do.”

Part of Louis wanted this alpha to stop talking and to drag Louis into one of Niall’s spare bedrooms so they could really start the new year right. The other part of him was suddenly on fire at the thought of being able to wear one of this alpha’s big, big shirts.

“That sounds great, actually,” Louis said, and batted his eyes a couple more times, “Would you mind?”

“Yeah, I’ll go – “ the alpha said, awkwardly hooking a thumb over this shoulder, “I just have to go outside, I can come find you?”

“That sounds good,” Louis smiled brightly. He shifted his stance a bit and his brand new trainers slapped against the cuddle of cola and booze at his feet.

“Okay,” the alpha said, and then, a small, awkward smile came on his face, “And if I have trouble finding you, I should ask someone if they’ve seen…?”

“Louis,” Louis said far too quickly, “You can ask for Louis.”

“Alright,” the alpha smiled, “Uh. Shirt. I’ll – I’ll go.”

He turned and stumbled off, then, and Louis could just stare after him as he went.

He had a big ass, too.

And Louis hadn’t gotten his name.

He immediately rushed to the kitchen, where thankfully the host of the evening was slouched against the counter, drinking a Kahlua and for some reason, wearing an unbuttoned Tommy Bahama shirt with nothing underneath. He was talking to a couple other people, but as soon as Louis entered he grabbed Niall’s arm and pulled him away.

“Louis, what the hell, man – “

“Niall,” Louis hissed, “I need you to identify someone at this party for me.”  

“Did he steal your wallet?”

“No, Niall, I’m not stupid enough to bring valuables to your house,” Louis said. “Anyways. I just met an alpha. Tall. Curly hair. Grey shirt.”

“Oh, that’s Harry,” Niall said, “Liam and Zayn knew him in college and he just moved back here for work a few months ago, I think?”

“And why, dear Niall, has no one introduced me to this Harry before tonight?”

Niall narrowed his eyes.

“Are you, like, into Harry?”

“Mind your business and answer my question.”

Niall gave him a look but shrugged.

“I don’t know, I guess we never planned anything with the both of you,” Niall said, “Again, why are you asking?”

“Doesn’t matter. Thanks,” Louis said, and then turned around and started to leave the kitchen. He heard Niall laughing at him, and he tried to ignore him, but then just as he was leaving the kitchen he nearly ran into Louis again.

“Whoa, sorry,” the alpha said, and flashed him a smile, “I didn’t mean to run into you twice.”

“Oh,” Louis said, suddenly memorized by the dimple that had appeared in Harry’s round cheek, “It’s okay.”

“I had to go looking for you, someone said they saw you come into the kitchen,” Harry said, “Anyways, I got your shirt for you.”

He pulled out a folded-up ball of fabric out from under his arm and flapped it out, holding it up for Louis to see. It was a grey t-shirt with the name of a law firm emblazoned on the right breast, and had a silky tag at the top that had “3XL” printed out.

“Um, this was the only decent thing in my car,” Harry shrugged, “It’s one of my work out shirts, but I promise it’s clean.”

“That’s great,” Louis said, “I’ll, uh, go put it on. And be right back.”

He took it from Harry a little too quickly and then slipped off the upstairs bathroom, since the downstairs unit had a line backed up to the living room. As soon as he was alone he shucked off his stained shirt and tossed it in the sink, trying to put a little soap on it while he was at it. When he pulled on Harry’s shirt, gasping weakly at how strongly it smelled of him.

The shirt went nearly to Louis’s knees and the short sleeves touched his elbows. Louis tugged a bit on it, shaking his head at how ridiculous he looked. It was New Year’s and he was wearing a shirt six sizes too big for him that he had borrowed from a strange alpha, and he couldn’t stop blushing.

He weakly slapped his own cheeks, shaking his head at himself in the mirror.

“Get it together, Tomlinson,” he muttered to himself, and he ran some more water over his shirt before just leaving it in the sink.

When he came back downstairs, Harry was waiting in the same position Louis had left him, and chuckled weakly when he saw Louis.

“Sorry it’s a bit big,” he said.

“I’ve been told oversized is my look,” Louis said, which made the alpha laugh again. He extended a hand towards Louis, his smile still in place.

“I’m Harry, by the way,” he offered.

“I know,” Louis said quickly as he took Harry’s – very, very big – hand, which made the alpha lift a brow, “I mean – uh, I kind of asked Niall for your name.”

“Oh,” Harry smiled, “That’s alright. You probably wouldn’t have seen me around; I went to school with Liam – “

“Yeah, I actually hang out with Liam a lot,” Louis said.

“No way, really?” Harry laughed.

“Yeah, really rude of him to never invite me to all the get-togethers you two have been having.”

Harry chuckled again, shaking his head.

“That’s crazy,” he said, “Well, I’m, um, I’m glad we met now.”

“Me too,” Louis said softly.

They just looked at each other for a long moment, and then Harry cleared his throat.

“Um, could I maybe fix a drink for you?” he asked, “I mean that in the least sketchy way possible, I just – I want to apologize again for crashing into you.”

“Yeah, that would be great,” Louis said.

“Great,” Harry nodded, “And, um, I think Liam and Zayn are trying to start a Mario Kart tournament in the other room but no one is joining them, if you want to go hang out – “

“I’d love to,” Louis quickly agreed, “Gotta, um, support Liam’s efforts when we can.”

“Right,” Harry said, and then gave Louis another dimple-laden smile that made his chest seize up, “So, um, can I make you that drink?”

Louis bounced on his toes, trying to give Harry the brightest smile he could offer.

“You sure can.”

[icequeenoriginal]

New Super Sarcastic Bros.

Pairings: Logicality and Prinxiety

Note: Me? Still obsessed with @sugarglider9603‘s Mario Au? More likely than you think. This was so fun to write so I did get a bit carried away. I hope you still enjoy it

Trigger Warnings: Deceit, kidnapping, tied up and gagged, knocked out, unconscious, hurt/comfort, manipulation, slight panic attack, fighting, swearing (I’m trying to get better at tagging triggers)

“You saved me, Lo!”

“It’s what I do.”

“You did awesome Virgil!”

“T-Thanks Ro. Let’s get you home.”

Bowceit rolled his eyes as he sat under the rumble of his once grand castle. He waited for the plumbers and the princes to leave before he got up and wiped the dirt off of him. Another plan had failed. He had lost to Logan and Virgil yet again and had neither Patton nor Roman as his husband.

Bowceit walked around, picking up the unconscious danger noodles from their various spots in the debris. He instructed the magikoopas that were still alive (and trying to flee) to rebuild the castle. He flopped into his throne as he watched the walls rise up once again around him. His decorations and lava were put back into their proper place. Slowly, his children woke up and choose to wait outside their rooms for them to be rebuilt. Leaving their father to sulk in his chair.

Once the castle was completely rebuilt, Bowceit made his way over to the kitchen. Pulling his favorite mug down, he turned to see one of his faithful Koopas making him a big pot of coffee. It was his tradition that after he lost to the Sarcastic Bros., he would drown his sorrows in coffee. His daughter had banned him from eating ramen noodles out of the coffee cup anymore.

Bowceit sighed as he took a sip. He was so exhausted. Every week he’d kidnap one of the princes, only to be defeated by the pesky plumbers. EVERY. SINGLE. TIME. No matter how hard he tried, no matter how many different plans he came up with, nothing worked.

He silently contemplated giving up. He could continue being a single dad to his eight wonderful children. He could focus on running his kingdom instead of fighting. His stuff wouldn’t be broken as often as it was. Maybe, just maybe, he should stop.

His thoughts were interrupted by a knock at the castle’s door. Finding that odd, Bowceit walked over. Upon opening it, he was greeted by a young woman. She was wearing a red dress and a red hat. Her eyes and hair were chocolate brown.

Bowceit would have found her beautiful if he wasn’t gay.

She smiled at him sweetly. “Hello there!”

“Hello” he replied deadpanned. He had noticed that in one of her hands was a red suitcase. He figured she was there to sell him something. He hoped the danger noodles would stay in their rooms or he’d lose a lot of coins fast.

“I hope I’m not bothering you but I was wondering if you could point me in the direction of the Mushroom Kingdom.”

Bowceit raised an eyebrow and raised the coffee to his mouth. “The Mushroom Kingdom? What business do you have there? Visiting the prince?”

The woman smile fondly “Oh nothing like that. I’m visiting two friends of mine. I doubt you know them.”

“Try me. I have a lot of...business...in the Mushroom Kingdom.” Bowceit took a sip of his coffee.

“Their names are Logan and Virgil” Bowceit immediately spat out his coffee and had a coughing fit.

The woman jumped and patted his back “Are you alright?!” She patted his back in an attempt to help him.

Suddenly, Bowceit straightened up “Yes, yes, I’m alright. What-What did you say your name was?”

“Oh, my name is Valerie. Do you know Logan and Virgil?”

Bowceit suddenly smiled and his confident demeanor returned. He straightens up and even fixed his leather jacket with his free hand. “I do. They’ve…done some work for me. How do you know them?”

The woman now known as Valerie replied “Oh we go way back! We’re longtime friends. Plus they…Oh, you probably don’t want to hear me ramble.”

“No please, I need to draw up a map anyway for you. Come in, come in.” Valerie was impressed by this man’s kindness and followed him into the castle.

“Would you like something to drink or eat as we talk?”

Valerie shook her head, wanting this visit to be short. She told Bowceit the basics, figuring the boys wouldn’t want a random stranger to know. This was more than enough for the villain. He concluded that the brothers have enough history with this woman to care about her wellbeing. Care enough that they would definitely come and try to rescue her.

Valerie tugged on his arm to pull him back into reality. “So, may I have that map now?”

“Map? Oh yes, the map! Excuse me for a moment!” Bowceit walked off and rubbed his hands together maniacally. Oh, how perfect this was! This was a sign that he mustn’t stop being a villain. He is one level pull away from trapping this woman. She will make perfect bait for the Sarcastic Bros while he can marry any prince of his choosing.

Bowceit suddenly stopped walking. A thought crossed his mind.

The princes.

The same princes who make no secret of how jealous they can get. Roman was more outward and Patton was inward but it was still apparent.

The princes who have never met this woman.

The princes who he wants to punish for helping to ruin his plans.

Bowceit smirked and quickly drew up a map. He walked over to her, forming his new plan with every step. “Here you are, my dear.”

Valerie popped up happily and took the map. “Oh thank you! It was nice meeting you.” Bowceit waved as she left.

Oh, this is going to be fun.

~

Prince Patton groaned as he rubbed his face. This was the worst week of the year. It was nothing but non-stop work and meetings. Usually, he would go as slowly as he could so he wouldn’t fry his brain. But now that he had Logan, Patton wanted to get it out of the way as soon as he possibly could. That didn’t make it easier.

Logan was a god’s sent for the past few days. He constantly checked on Patton, gives him neck and back messages and makes sure he sleeps and eats. Patton was currently distracted by Logan making him tea, so much so that he nearly fell out of his throne.

Logan walked in, carefully holding a  teacup. “Here you go dear, take a quick break. I’ll look over some of those papers.”

Patton stood up and took the drink gratefully. He was clearly exhausted. “Thank you, love. You’re amazing.” Patton took a sip and felt the peace run down his throat to calm him down. Logan sat on the throne and began looking over the plans Patton had for building stronger houses for the Thomases and Talyns in the event of a Bowceit attack.

Patton smirked and sat innocently on Logan’s lap. Logan didn’t look up from his work, only wrapping his free arm around Patton. Patton leaned into the embrace and began to gently kiss Logan’s ear, cheek, and neck. Logan’s face progressively got redder by the minute and his focus figuratively jumped out the window. He turned his head slowly to captured Patton’s traveling lips.

They were interrupted by a sudden squeal. They both turned to see a very delighted Valerie. “Omg, Logan!”

Logan was shocked to see his old friend but no less happy to see her “Valerie!” He quickly picked up Patton and put the prince in his throne before running off to hug her.

“It’s been so long!”

“My, have you’ve grown!”

“I can’t believe you’re here!”

Patton felt his heart shatter as he witnessed the exchange. Who was this beautiful woman hugging his boyfriend? Logan has certainly never mentioned her before. Was she his ex…? No…Logan told him he never dated anyone before. He wouldn’t lie...right…?

Patton took a deep breath and walked over with the most genuine smile he could. “Hello there.”

Valerie curtsied “Hello your majesty.”

“Please, call me Patton.” She talks his hand and gives it a gentle squeeze. “And you are?”

The woman smiled “My name is Valerie.”

Logan patted her shoulder and spoke proudly “She is a dear friend of mine. We go way back!”

“Dear friend? Honey, I’m your best friend! Virgil’s too!”

Patton’s heart began to break as he watched the exchange between the two. They were so close, in a whole different world. A world Patton wasn’t allowed in.

Valerie tugged on Logan’s arm “Come on! You must show me around.”

Logan didn’t hesitate “Of course!” They ran out of the castle, leaving the prince with nothing but his work and a slowly growing pain in his chest.

~

Virgil sat bored outside Roman’s meeting hall. He started hitting his legs to create a beat. He figured he could start writing a new song. One for Roman so he wouldn’t stab himself out of frustration. He felt so sorry for his boyfriend. Virgil could barely handle the small amount of paper required for when he was a plumber, he could never imagine what mountains Roman has to climb as a leader of a kingdom.

A Talyn ran up to his with a newly acquired cell phone. The plumbers had them installed mainly so that the princes could communicate easily or if the plumbers needed the other’s help.

“It’s your brother.” Virgil nodded and took the phone, a silent thank you.

“Hell? Hey Lo, what’s up? Seriously? No way! I’ll be right there!” Virgil put the phone down and went to knock on the door that separates him and Roman. He shook his head, he couldn’t possibly bother Roman while he was doing serious business. He didn’t want to get in the way. Smiling to himself, Virgil took off. He figured Roman wouldn’t mind.

~

An hour later, Roman exited the room, feeling accomplished. He got a good amount of work taken care of which met he could spend time with Virgil. As Roman began to fantasize about what they could do, he saw that the chair that Virgil was occupying was empty. He had to ask several different Talyns and Thomases before finding the one who gave Virgil the phone.

“His brother called, your majesty, and then he took off.”

“Thank you.” Roman went to his room and scooped up all the documents he could and placed them in a bag. He figured Patton had been kidnapped again and Logan called Virgil for his help. He hopped into his carriage and hoped the Mushroom Kingdom was alright. Upon seeing everything too peaceful in the kingdom though, Roman began to wonder if there was another reason Virgil left.

As Roman walked into the castle, he barely dodged the flying bowl thrown his way. A few Talyns and Thomases were worried as they clean up after their angry prince. They practically pushed him into the kitchen, begging him to calm Patton down.

Roman could almost laugh at what he was seeing. Patton and his kitchen were covered in flour and dough as Patton angrily stirred in his bowl, sending the ingredients all around the room. Roman grabbed a cookie before stealing the bowl from Patton with a smirk.

“Yo Pat! What did the bowl do to you?” Roman’s smirk dropped when he saw Patton look down at ground instead of reply. Roman gently lifted his chin and saw that tears were forming in his eyes “What’s wrong?”

Patton tried to blink away his tears. “A woman…”

“A woman?”

Patton nodded “A woman came by…she said she’s Logan’s best friend��he never told me about her.”   

Roman was shocked, Logan was so open with Patton, and a sinking feeling developed in his stomach “Best friend?” “Yeah, Virgil’s too…”

“WHAT?!”

Patton pointed to the window and revealed to Roman the woman hugging Virgil.

Who the hell does she think she is, hugging his man?! Roman balled up his fists and was ready to march right over there and deck her if Patton hadn’t physically restrained him. Roman didn’t fight it, opting to give Patton a hug. He rubbed circles into Patton back and Patton let himself cry.

Roman gave him a soft smile “Let’s get you cleaned up.” Roman grabbed a rag and began to wipe the food and tears off of Patton’s face. This allowed Patton to catch his breath and let more tears fall.

Roman got to Patton’s arms when they noticed their boyfriends and that woman were headed towards the entrance of the castle. Patton abruptly turned and began to wipe his eyes roughly to stop himself from crying. He grabbed the closest sponge and tossed it to Roman. “Start cleaning, please.”

Roman nodded and started wiping the wall. He imagined himself running at Virgil and tackling him to the ground. Not to attack him, just to aggressively make out with him to show the woman needed to back off. He never got the chance though, Logan called out for Patton and Patton shouted back that he was in the kitchen.

Logan and Virgil walked in with big grins on their faces as their boyfriend scrubbed away their sorrows.

“Hey honey, I’m back!”

“Ro! I didn’t know you were here!” Roman nearly threw the sponge at his head. He really wanted to yell at Virgil for leaving without telling him but Roman also wanted to yell at Logan for making Patton cry.

Logan gave Patton a side hug, oblivious to the pained expression of the prince’s face. “Since we’re all here, how about the five of us talk over tea?”

Roman turned his head to him bewildered as Patton hide his expression behind his bangs. “Five?”

Virgil gently took Roman’s arms “Yeah! We want to introduce you guys to Valerie!”

Roman looked at Virgil and his heart ached. Virgil looked so excited to introduce him, how could he say no to that?

Both Princes nodded their heads. Patton even told them to take Valerie to the common room so the princes could make the tea. That allowed the princes to regain their composure, however fake, especially after the punch to the gut of their boyfriends running off too quickly for their tastes.

Roman gripped the sink as Patton started up the kettle “We’re going to join them, aren’t we?”

Patton sucked in his breath “Yup.”

“Wonderful.”

~

Patton’s teacup was shaking in his hands “S-So, h-how did you guys met?” Patton took a sip to calm himself down. Tea always helped.

If anyone noticed that the prince was acting strangely, no one voiced it. Virgil decided to start the tale “Lo and I used to live in New Donk City, where Valerie is from.”

“Thanks for telling me about that.” Roman thought bitterly.

Logan continued “But we didn’t know each other. The day we really met was when we rescued Valerie from this crazy monkey who climbed up the tallest building in the city, the one we happened to be working in.”

Patton felt like he was going to throw up “I thought I was your first rescue…”

“It was nothing Valerie,” Logan replied

“Nothing?! Without you two, my city wouldn’t have its mayor.”

Both Roman nearly choked on his tea while Patton’s cookie missed his mouth. Patton gently put the cookie down and whipped his face before answering “Y-You’re the mayor?”

“Oh yes! I forgot to mention that.” The princes sighed. Great, she was basically like them. There was nothing to top it.

Roman wasn’t going to give in that easily “So what happened next? Did you two date or something?” He gestured between Logan and Valerie, not wanting to even think that Virgil was a possibility. The three city folk erupted in laughter. Valerie regained her composer first. “No, no! One of them would have to be attracted to women for me to date them. No, we’re just great friends.” Valerie smiled and leaned over the table, taking a hand from each of the princes. “I’m so happy my boys found such great guys like you.”

Once she let go, the princes exchanged a look that screamed: “She’s a keeper.”

And yet, that didn’t make it hurt less. The princes had never seen their boyfriends smile like this. They seemed so happy spending time with her. They weren’t bogged down with the responsibility of protecting her, they could be normal adults with her. They looked so relaxed, a calmness neither prince could ever remember providing.

It didn’t help that the princes weren’t being included in the conversations.

Roman gave up right away, watching the tea leaf float in his teacup. He couldn’t look at Virgil. He couldn’t watch someone else light up his eyes. He couldn’t accept the fact that someone else made Virgil happy before Roman ever met him and continues to. Roman felt so unneeded, he just wanted to lock himself in his castle so that he didn’t have to face the fact Virgil loved someone else.

Patton tried to jump into the conversations, but it involved inside jokes and memories Patton would never know about. Patton’s eyes fell on Logan. Logan…who is forced to save Patton every week while he only had to save Valerie once. Was that why Logan ran off so eagerly? To have a taste of life without having to put up with him? Patton’s heart shattered. Maybe Logan secretly hated him and was only still with Patton because he was a prince.

Valerie sudden straighten up with a look of realization on her face, snapping the princes’ out of their depressing thoughts. “I almost forgot! I wanted to visit the cafe Talent! .I’ve been told it’s a must do when you visit here”

Roman interjected before either plumber could speak, “O-Oh, you could go to that, or y-you could come and watch the tennis game Pat and I were about to put on!”

Both Virgil’s and Logan’s faces became red fast. A tennis game meant their boyfriends were going to wear their sports outfits. The brothers were not ready for that. They each grabbed Valerie’s arms and lifted her up at out of her chair. “We’ll see you guys after the game!” They ran off quickly, telling Valerie stories of their adventures to block out their fantasies.

“O-Oh okay…” Patton tried to stay positive as he watched them leave. “You kiddos enjoy yourselves while we have fun…playing tennis…right Roman?” He got no reply. He turned to see Roman walking off. “Roman?”  

Roman walked over to the lake, eyes closed and hands folded. Once he made it to the edge, he abruptly opened his eyes and blurted out a huge scream of pure anger. The scream was so powerful that his people all the way in Sarasaland could hear him. Thankfully, (or unfortunately, if you are Roman) Virgil was walking in the other direction and lost in the conversation so he was unable to hear Roman.

Thomas and Talyn hide fearfully behind their equally terrified prince. Roman walked back over to Patton and smiled “Shall we?”

Patton just nodded his head and followed Roman back into his castle to get changed. In the distance, Bowceit was happily enjoying the spectacle. He threw his head back, almost choking from the laughter. He quickly realized he had finished his popcorn.

“Well, time to get this party started.”

~ They never made it to the tennis courts.

Once they arrived in Patton’s room the change, the princes flopped onto Patton’s bed. They are on different sides of the bed, heads meeting in the middle. Roman gently taps his feet against the headboard before kicking it in anger. He kicked it so hard that he moved so that their shoulders were next to each other.

“Who does she think she is?! Being all perfect and taking all their attention?! She’s hasn’t been around them like we are!” As Roman continued to rant, he waved his arms to strengthen his point. Patton listens intently to avoid giving attention to the aching feeling in his chest.

“And how can Virgil be so comfortable around her! He’s barely comfortable around me and we’re dating! Not to mention living together!” Roman covered his face with his hands “And I can’t even banish her since Virgil likes her so much.” Patton chuckled as Roman turned his head to him “We could kill her.”

Patton hit his arm playfully “Roman Marigold of Sarasaland! What would your mother say?”

“She would say” Roman straighten up and make his voice sound snooty “Roman, as a prince, you must be a host and you must be kind to all. We do not wish ill will onto someone.” His voice changed back to normal “And then she’d tell me to sit up straight or something.”

Patton laughed, that made him feel better. It’s been a while since the two of them were able to have a happy moment like this. They were children again, with no fear of Bowceit and no jealousy plaguing them.

Roman sighed “I can’t blame her though. It’s all me. I’m insecure about our relationship and I’m so afraid of losing him that I act like this but it’ll only result in me pushing him away.”

Patton did a double taken. “Woah, where did that come from?”

“...I’ve been hanging out with Picani too much.”

Patton smiled and gently bumped their heads together “Don’t worry about it, it’s not just you.”

“You?! But you and Logan are perfect together!”

Patton looked away “Perfect? I never heard of a perfect relationship that involves needing weekly rescues?” Patton shook his head and curled up into a ball “I’m so scared he’s going to become sick of rescuing me and he’ll just leave and I’ll be forced to marry Bowceit--”

“Hey, hey.” Roman caught his attention “That’s never going to happen. Sarcastic bros or not, you’re never going to have to be forced to marry that snake. I’ll make sure of it.”

Patton smiled “Thanks, Ro. You’re the best.”

Roman shrugged “It’s what I do.”

They laid there a little while longer, finishing off the cookies made by a stressed Patton. They continued to gossip and complain, just to past the time. Eventually, Patton tapped Roman and said: “Come on, we have work to do.”

Roman whined “No! I don’t want to!”

Patton pulled on his arm “We have to. We both have a bunch of individual work, plus we have to re-establish our alliance.”

Roman sat up. “Fineee. Hey Pat? Are we still each other’s best friend?”

Patton let out an offended noise “Of course we are! Why would you even need to ask?”

Roman dodged the question by continuing with: “So, because we are best friends, we would want our kingdoms to be allies?”

“Yes.”

Roman clapped his hands together “Great! Meeting’s over, let’s go back to complaining about our boyfriends.” Roman flopped back onto the bed.

Patton pulled him off the bed “Get up Roman, I know you don’t want to do this but we have to.”

Roman laid on the floor in protest “No, what I have to be doing is cuddling with Virgil in my bed with the door lock, keeping all my problems outside.”

Patton dropped the papers on him “Up, now.”

Roman sighed and gave in. They both sat on Patton’s bed as they read through the different files. Both of them let out a groan once they got through one packet in half an hour.

Roman looked up at the window and shouted “Hey Bowceit! If you’re planning on kidnapping me, now would be a great time!” Both princes began to laugh until they heard the sudden sound of running feet.

Patton suddenly became terrified “Could it be?!”

Roman shook his head but moved so that he was between Patton and the door “No way. He’s not that stupid to a) stalk us and b) actually listen to anything I say.” Still, Roman had a bad feeling and he reached down for his sword.”

The door bursts open, revealing an out of breath Logan and Virgil with a slightly frustrated Talyn. For a second, Roman wonder if they heard him and he was about to get yelled at.

Talyn pointed at the princes “See? I told you they were fine.” That didn’t seem to be enough for the plumber. They practically threw themselves at their boyfriends. Patton melted into the touch as if he had never been held before even though he was in Logan's arms hours before. He needed this so badly.

Roman was just very confused. He still returned the hug though.

Logan kissed Patton’s head before speaking “Thank god you’re alright.”

Despite all that, Patton was the first one to pull away. “Honey, what’s wrong?”

Logan looked down, ashamed “We were taking Valerie to the cafe…”

Patton grabbed his hands so he would continue

“And then Bowceit showed up in his gigantic ship and attacked the town. We fought him off but once the smoke cleared, Valerie was gone. We looked everywhere.”

Patton frowned and Roman shook his head, that villain would never give up.

Virgil continued “We were going to go straight to Bowceit’s castle but we stopped to check on you guys.”

The princes' heads snapped towards him as Logan nodded: “Yes, and when we saw that you guys weren’t at the tennis courts, we feared the worse.”

The princes exchanged a look. Did he say what I think he said?

~

Valerie woke up with a headache and with no idea where she was. She looked around the dark room and saw nothing. Her arms were tied to the arms of a chair and her legs were tied to the legs of the chair. She swore she could see a shadow watching her but when she called out, no one replied. She pulled on the restraints but it was no use.

Suddenly, the shadow moved into the light and she saw the man with the strange face from before. She needed answers now. “What’s going on? Why am I here?”

Bowceit smiled “Pardon my rudeness my dear but I did tell you a bit of a lie. Several actually. I felt bad so I brought you here. Let me start over. My name is King Bowceit.”

Valerie tilted her head “King Bowceit? Wait a minute, I know who you are! You’re always kidnapping princes!”

Bowceit scoffed “That’s what everyone one says now thanks to those two jerks you call friends. What really happened was I was supposed to marry one of the princes but those pesky plumbers got in the way. That forced me to use…different methods.”

“So kidnapping princes.”

“You say kidnapping, I say proposing.” “You’re insane!”

“Thank you.” Bowceit walked back into the darkness and flipped on the lights “But really, that’s beside the point, I brought you here to thank you.”

“Thank me?” Valerie was flabbergasted.

Bowceit smirked, “Yes, because, by the time those idiots are done saving you, I’ll be a married man.”

~

Logan turned to Virgil “We should get going.” He looked back at Roman and Patton “you two stay here.”

Virgil nodded “We should get some of the power-ups we have stored here, to make the trip faster.” The twins ran out of the room and to their makeshift armory. Roman got up from his spot on the bed. Roman stood up and his eyebrows pressed together.

“We were an afterthought.”

“Roman…” Patton didn’t want the fighting to continue. Even if he felt the same way as Roman. He gripped his chest, his way of trying to physically stop his heart from breaking.

“We were an afterthought Patton, they were just going to leave. And you know it too. I can tell by the way your holding your chest.” Patton didn’t reply, Roman knew him too well.

Roman groaned “These are our heroes, why can’t someone else save her…?”. Patton looked at the door before verbally agreeing with Roman. He didn’t want Logan to know he felt this way, not yet anyway.

Unbeknownst to Patton; Logan and Virgil had already returned and heard what was said. Logan sighed “They’re angry with us, but we really must go. We should fix this now.”  

Virgil nodded “Right and we have to do this delicately.” Virgil walked up to the princes “You know, Valerie was our first rescue, so she kinda deserves it more than you guys.”

Patton once again had to physically restrain Roman.

“Excellent job Virgil,” Logan stated sarcastically.

“Oh like you could do better”

“I can, and will.” Logan went to cup Patton’s face but Patton moved away from the touch, he did not like being spied on.

“Why does it always have to be you? Why can’t you let anyone else do it?” Patton’s voice dripped with venom. He wasn’t angry at Valerie nor was he angry at Logan, he just had so much pent up emotions that were fighting to escape him.

Logan pulled back. The only other time Patton was ever this hostile was when he was possessed by the Shadow Queen. That’s a time Logan never wanted to revisit. He turned around, his eyes dark “Let’s go, Virgil. We’re wasting time.”

“We’re coming with you.”

~

Bowceit walked out of the room, satisfied with himself when he ran into the danger noodles. “Kids? Is something wrong?”

“Is she going to be our new mother?” Roy asked curiously, the other danger noodles nodded to indicate that’s what they all wanted to ask.

Bowceit smiled sympathetically “Sorry kiddos but no, she’s only the bait.”

Wendy perked up “What, you’re doing something different!”

Bowceit pressed his lips together for a moment “Okay, first, rude. And second, I guess so?”

Wendy started to bounce happily “Can we have a new castle?”

Bowceit was taken back “A new castle? Why do you want a new castle?”

Larry nodded “You’re doing something different, therefore we should have a new castle or at least a new theme.”

“This castle’s look is a bit boring anyway,” Iggy commented

“...I clearly spoil you, children, too much. BUT! You have caught my attention. Did you have any ideas in mind?”

“CASINO CASTLE!” They all scream in unison.

“Casino castle?” Bowceit smiled “I like it. MAGIKOOPAS! COME HERE NOW!”  

~

Logan swirled around, clearly frustrated “What did you say?”

Roman’s arms were crossed by his chest was puffed out “I said, we’re coming with you. Patton and I.”

Logan pinched the bridge of his nose “And why do you want to come?”

“As the prince of a country, I don’t have to answer that.” Roman step forward and got in Logan’s face. As much as he could since Logan was the tallest.

Logan glared down at him, frustration taking over. There was so tension in the room that Patton found himself holding his breath.  “No,” Logan uttered simply.

Patton winced, Logan sounded so angry. Roman would not back down, he grabbed Patton’s hand and walked out of the room.

Roman and Patton gave off one emotion each as they walked to Roman’s carriage. Anger and Sadness. Hot and Cold. Two opposites, yet they gave off the same amount of energy. An energy that terrified the people to not even blink at them. Though the Talyn who drove Roman’s carriage had to force themselves to ask where the princes want to go, not questioning why they both said ‘Bowceit’s castle’ simultaneously.

It petrified all. All except the plumber who could control it.

The plumbers jumped into the carriage directly after the princes. The couples sat separately from one another. Roman stared out the window, arms and legs crossed. Virgil, who was sitting across from him, looked down. He wanted to look into Roman’s soft eyes. He didn’t mean to snap. Patton looked directly at Logan, longing for forgiveness that wasn’t needed. Logan’s eyes were shut, he was hoping when he opened them, he would be in bed and the day would reset so he could make up for his mistakes.

Patton and Virgil locked eyes and silently agreed to end this fighting. Patton figured the best approach would be to switch spots. Not because he was planning to throw himself onto Logan, don’t be preposterous. Patton pointed at himself with one hand and Virgil with the other then switch them, hoping that it would convey his thought process. He got a confused look in return. Patton looked around before gesturing to Roman then Virgil. Virgil made an “oh!” face and nodded. Patton sighed of relief, Virgil knew exactly what Patton meant--

“Hey Ro!” Patton facepalmed, Virgil understood nothing.

Roman said nothing, he didn’t even turn. The only motion he made was to lift up his umbrella and pull down a curtain that cut the carriage in half with the handle. Mission failed.

Virgil sighed “Lo, my boyfriend’s mad at me and I don’t know what to do.” Virgil didn’t care who heard him, he just missed Roman. He looked at the unmoving curtain. If the princes were listening, there was no indication. Roman was but he was still staring out the window. He was lost in anger.

Logan shook his head “Roman is acting irrationally and is an overall stubborn person. This will eventually pass and everything will be fine.”

Both Patton and Virgil waited for Roman to stab Logan through. He didn’t. The curtain stayed still. Patton didn’t even have to hold him back. He didn’t move, he didn’t blink, the prince was quiet. The prince was quiet. That wasn’t a good sign.

Virgil began to panic “Great, just great. Roman is now never going to forgive me, I’m going to be banished from his kingdom and lose the best thing that has ever happened to me!” Logan rubbed his back and instructed Virgil to breathe. He didn’t notice though. He was focused on a certain sound. A familiar sound. A pleasant sound. It was faint, nearly a whisper. It was Roman’s singing. Roman sang to help Virgil calm down from a panic attack. Virgil was sure he was just imagining it.

He had no time to find out because the carriage suddenly stopped and sent the princes flying forward.

The sudden weight caused the curtain to rip off the ceiling of the carriage, involuntary catching the princes. Roman immediately sat up and fixed his hair. He then turned to check on Patton. “You good Pat?”

Patton nodded and tried catching his breath “Yes, I landed on something.” Patton patted the ground and his eyes suddenly widen when he felt it was uneven. He jumped back, he knew what he landed on. Logan got up from under the curtain and rubbed his head. He looked over Patton for any injuries but when he came upon Patton’s eyes. They were filled with fear and staring back at them. Was Patton afraid of him? He pulled the hand he had reached out to touch Patton back and looked away. He didn’t want to frighten him more.

Patton’s heart shattered. He made Logan upset. Logan thought he was being irrational in his jealousy, he had only said Roman’s name but Patton knew Logan was talking about him too. He was so scared that he would make Logan hate him. Now he didn’t even want to touch Patton. Patton was crushed.

Roman pulled Virgil up and even fixed his hat. Virgil smiled softly but Roman looked away. He was still angry, he wasn’t going to be the one to apologize again. Roman let out a “Hmph!” and made his way to the door.

Logan grabbed his arm and pulled him towards Patton “Stay. Here.” Logan grabbed Virgil and left before Roman could protest. The now damaged carriage was surrounded by Bowceit’s minions. The twins saw this as an opportunity to get their anger out. The enemies were dealt with very quickly, to say the least.

Roman glared at the shut door, he wasn’t planning on sitting around. He grabbed his umbrella and Patton’s hand and they walked out. He didn’t even have to drag Patton this time. Patton wanted to prove to Logan that he was worthy and to win his love back.

They spoke to the Talyn and informed them to keep the carriage there. The princes instructed Talyn that they should call some other Talyns to help fix the carriage but do not wait for the princes. They were going to finish the journey on foot.

The Sarcastic Bros actually didn’t notice the princes were following them until Roman jumped over Logan to get the flag at the end of the world. For Roman and Virgil, it became a race. A race for Virgil to close the distance between them and Roman to lengthen it. Roman wasn’t ready to talk yet. For Logan and Patton, it was like a game of ‘Hide and Seek’, where Patton did the hiding and Logan did the seeking. Patton wasn’t necessarily trying to hide from Logan, it was just that Patton wanted to show off his strength without any help

Despite all that, they actually made very good progress on getting to Bowceit. It was shocking how well they worked together, even when they were this emotional.

~

A Hammer Bro. sheepishly walked over to Bowceit. Bowceit was being fitted for a silver glitter suit with matching silver top hat. He looked happy. Crap.

“M-Master!”

Bowciet turn to it. “Yes? What is it?”

“Patton…was not in his castle…”  

“What?!” The hammer bro jumped back, brought its hands up as if it was praying.

“W-We check the entire castle. We even attacked the kingdom, but he wasn’t there.”

Bowceit rubbed his temples “So why would you come here instead of going to get Prince Roman?”

The Hammer Bro. bite its lip “W-We did, also nothing.”

Bowceit clenched his teeth. Those plumbers weren’t smart enough to hide the princes, were they? “Find them. Now. I have a wedding chapel and no prince to get married in it!” The Hammer Bro ran off as Bowceit Jr. slithered in.

“Dad! Dad! You’ll never guess what I saw when I was in Ice Zone!” The danger noodle was practically dancing as he spoke.

Bowceit smiled and rubbed his son’s head “What did you see?”

“Mr. Roman and Patton were there! They were fighting and everything!”

Bowceit raised his eyebrows. This certainly was a different day. He sent Bowceit Jr. to join his siblings in the playroom. Bowceit pondered on what to do. If the princes were fighting, then they weren’t as affected by jealousy as Bowceit previously thought. Or maybe they were.

He wanted to find out.

~

Patton was exhausted. He was drained physically and especially emotionally. He wouldn’t stop, Logan was too important to him. Logan took notice of the prince’s slumped shoulder and yawns and forced the group to stop. “We should make camp.”

Everyone looked at him, bewilder. “Camp? Since when do we make camp?” Virgil asked

“Since we have two monarchs with us.” Patton looked down and hugged himself. Logan was frowning. Logan had his back turned to Patton. Logan was angry at him. Patton walked off and sat on a rock. Only Roman seemed to notice.

Logan used the mostly intact curtain and an array of sticks to craft a makeshift tent. “It can fit about two people maybe. Roman, Patton, you two take the tent. Virgil and I will be fine out here.” Logan was facing the tent, hands on his hips. Oblivious to the situation unfolding.

Roman stormed up to him, stared straight into Logan’s eyes and threw his sword into the tent. “Congratulations, you are now one of the only two people to ever make Patton cry. You should be so proud.” Roman walked off but in the opposite direction of Patton.

Logan's stomach flipped as he slowly turned to face Patton’s spot. To his horror, Patton was curled up into a ball, shaking. Logan couldn’t hear him but he knew Patton was crying. Logan slowly walked over and wrapped his arms around Patton. Patton’s head shot up but he otherwise didn’t move. Logan buried his head into Patton’s shoulder and pulled the prince close. Patton action turned Patton into butter.

“I’m so sorry for upsetting you, my love. The thought of you crying makes my mind go dark but to be the cause of it, there’s no greater crime. Getting your cold shoulder worse than frostbite. Your scorn is worse than the heat of any star. To earn your wrath, I must have done some heinous. I don’t know what I did to make you angry but I apologize for it. I hope you will forgive me.” Logan said softly, muffled by the prince’s garment. That didn’t make them any less perfect. It was exactly what Patton needed to hear. He only had one question.

“Oh, Lo…who said I was mad at you? I thought you were mad at me!” Patton exclaimed

Logan picked his head up, looking into Patton’s eyes to see if he’s joking “Darling, why on Earth would I ever be mad at you?”

Patton looked down, fixating his gaze on Logan’s lips. “It didn’t seem like you wanted me here or around, generally…”

Logan frowned “Patton, the day I don’t want you around is the day I’m dying so I won’t see you mourn.”

Patton bit his lip doubtfully “It didn’t seem like it, especially after Valerie arrived. You looked so happy spending time with her and you never asked me to come, so what was I supposed to think? You never told me she even existed!”

Logan cupped Patton’s face. “Patton-cake, were you jealous?” Patton nodded and moved closer to Logan. Logan smiled softly. “Oh my love, I’m sorry you felt that way. You have nothing to fear though, my love for you is unending. I apologize for not asking you to come, I didn’t want to distract you from your work.” The kiss they shared was as magical as their first one.

Once they pulled away, Patton yawned. Logan kissed his head and smiled “Get some rest love, you need it.”

Patton nodded and kissed Logan’s cheek. He walked into the tent as Logan used the spot Patton was occupying to sketch the stars. Patton climbed into the tent carefully to avoid knocking over what Logan had made for him.

He noticed that on top of Roman’s sword, there was a small ball shaped object on it. Knowing how much Roman cared about his sword, Patton flicked it away. Suddenly it started to let out a gas that was trapped inside it. Patton felt his eyelids become heavy and he passed out almost instantly.

For a few seconds, there seemed to be no explanation to what had happened to the prince. That is until two Buzzy Beetles crawled into the tent and shoved themselves between Patton and the ground. They slowly carried Patton out of the tent, making sure to go unnoticed. It was slow and painful for the minions, one wrong mistake and Logan would be crushing them. As soon as Patton was inches away from the Flying Koopas, they picked him up and flew away as quickly as they could.

Once again, Logan didn’t notice.

~

Virgil watched Logan embrace Patton for a few moments, he was proud of his brother. He turned and gulped, ready to face Roman. He planned on doing the same as his brother since it seemed to work.

Keyword being planned to.

Once he got a few feet from Roman, the prince turned his head sharply. Roman was wearing a glare. It was enough to make Virgil raise his hands and slowly back away.

Roman turned his head back “I thought you were Logan…”

Virgil sighed of relief “Sorry to disappoint you.”

Roman looked up at the stars. “Not disappointed”

Virgil stepped closer “Then what?”

“Frustrated, angry, a little bit sad.” Roman slowly turn to face Virgil.

“But why?” Virgil took another step towards Roman.

Roman frowned “You left.” Roman stood up “You left and didn’t tell me you were leaving.” Both Roman and Virgil took a step forward. “You did all that to spend time with someone who you are very close to. Someone you’ve never told me about.” Roman took another step forward.

A million sentences ran Virgil’s head. A million apologizes. A million ‘I love you’s. A million explanations. A million cynical remarks. A million jokes.

But all that could come out was: “You’re jealous.”

Roman rolled his eyes. He couldn’t tell if that was a statement or question but he was too stubborn to ask. The couple turned their backs to one another. Roman slumped his shoulders, he really didn’t want to keep fighting, but he couldn't’. It was his nature to just fight, fight, fight until the bitter end. It was who he was. It was who he had to be.

Virgil rubbed his arm absently, that didn’t work. He needed to choose his words carefully. He took a deep breath before he spoke. “Roman, you always get jealous…with other guys…and I…can’t take it anymore.” Roman whipped around, ready to plead with Virgil when a hammer hit him directly in the back of the head and rendered him unconscious. Before Roman could hit the ground, a Magikoopa used its magic to not only muffle the sound of the hammer but also to catch Roman. Virgil didn’t turn, he was working on what to say next. “I can’t take seeing you sad and suffering. I want to fix it, I want to help you.” Virgil smiled “So what do you say?” Virgil turned to see nothing.

Roman was gone.

Virgil sucked in his breath. Had Roman left before he finished? Did Roman think he was mad at him? Did Roman misinterpret what he said? Did Roman not want to accept his apology? Had he pushed Roman to run away?

Virgil ran to the camp, frantic. “Logan! I fucked up!”

Logan arched an eyebrow. “In what way?”

Virgil paced back and forth as he spoke “I was trying to make up with Roman and now he’s gone and I think he’s mad and now I don’t know what to do and now you’re giving me a look and…” Virgil began to pant, he had run out of words and energy.

Logan pulled him into a hug and rubbed gentle circles into his back. “Breathe Virgil. Remember, 4-7-8.” Virgil nodded and eventually calmed down. Logan gave him a small smile “Let’s wake Patton and find Roman, okay?”

Virgil smiled and nodded, he liked the sound of that. Logan poked his head into the tent slowly so he wouldn’t startle Patton. He frowned when he saw nothing but Roman’s sword. “That’s odd.”

Virgil tilted he head “What’s wrong?”

Logan stood up straight and pulled out Roman’s sword “Patton is missing as well.”

Virgil sighed of relief “Oh thank god. He’s not mad at me, just kidnapped.” It took a moment before Virgil processed his own words “Oh crap, Roman’s been kidnapped.”

Logan groaned “Most likely along with Patton. Wonderful, now we have three people to worry about.”

Virgil began to hyperventilate “Make that four.”

~

“...Ro…Rom...Roman!” Roman’s head jerk forward suddenly, a big mistake as it worsen the splitting headache he had he had. Roman attempted to get up and groaned when he found himself chained. Not this again…

Patton felt the relief wash over when he felt Roman stir behind him. He was shocked when he awoke to see he was no longer in his tent and it only grew worse as he slowly realized what had happened. He just hoped no one was hurt.

Roman wanted to ask Patton if he was alright, but the words died as the reached his tongue. Roman’s head was still blaring, but not from the injury. The argument with Virgil kept playing over and over, make Roman sick to his stomach. The guilt consumed Roman. He had truly screwed up, and there was nothing he could do about it now. Patton

Suddenly, spotlights turn on, blinding Patton and Roman. They now could see that they were chained to the wheelhead of a gigantic roulette wheel. The pockets were pink and orange, the princes could only imagine what it meant. Looking up at the balcony, they could Valerie trapped in large prize ball, looking terrified. Bowceit stood beside her, in his shiny silver sequin suit and holding a cane.

Roman burst out laughing “HAHAHA!! YOU LOOK RIDICULOUS!!”

Bowceit groaned “Oh great, Roman’s awake. Wonderful. Just what I needed.”

Roman smiled proudly “I live to serve.”  That made Patton giggle.

Bowceit groaned and did something so extra, it even impressed Roman. He climbed off his balcony, climbed into the roulette wheel, and climbed up the wheelhead, all to slap Roman across the face.

Bowceit walked back to his spot, his wicked smile returning. “Now I’ve heard from a little birdy that you two think I’m not very fair.”

Roman narrowed his eyes “No you didn’t. You heard it from us, to your face, said among other things.”

“Roman, I swear to god, I will slap you again.”

Roman smirked “By all means, do it. Take your time even.”

“I’m not falling for that again.” Bowceit mumbled

Roman leaned forward “What was that?”

Bowceit groaned but took a deep breath, ignoring Roman to continue his speech. “Well, I want to let you both know that I am going to fix this. Instead of me picking who I marry, this handy-dandy roulette wheel will.” Photos of the princes appeared on screens behind the pockets. “And to show just how good I can be, I’ll let Valerie go with the prince who isn’t picked. Now, isn’t that just so nice of me?”

All three hostages voted no.

“WELL I DON’T CARE, LET’S START!” Bowceit pulled a lever and a large white ball appeared. There was a pause as a giant plunger,  a thing you would normally find on a pinball machine, pulled back like on a pinball machine and sent the ball flying, round and round the roulette wheel.

Roman began working his way out of the chains, noticing what a sloppy job Bowceit had done this time. As Roman pulled his leg up to stand, he noticed that his photo slowly turned into Patton’s. Roman immediately sat back down and the picture turned back to Roman.

Patton’s eyes widen “Ro, did you see that?”

“Yup…”

Patton bit his lip “What should we do?”

Roman looked up, the ball was getting closer and closer to the pockets by the second, they needed to act quickly. “I have an idea pat. On three, we get up at the same time.”

“Got it.”

“One, two, three.” the princes both hopped up, keeping the same weight on the sensors. Per Roman’s instructions, they managed to get themselves out of the chains, each movement perfectly timed to be done at the same time. However, there was one more challenge, Bowceit had them chained  on a small platform attached near the top of the wheelhead, it was very high up. The ladder was small enough for only one of them to go down, meaning whoever went first was dooming the other. Not to mention Patton was terrified of heights and didn’t seem to be moving now.

The ball was very close to the pockets now, they were trapped.

Virgil wants to break up with you because of how jealous you get. He never told you about this important person in his life. Does he really love you? Roman shook his head, he wasn’t going to let his panic thoughts takeover now.

Patton began to hyperventilate, he had no idea how they were going to escape now.

An idea popped into Roman’s head and he gulped. He turned his head to Patton “Patton?”

“Yeah Ro?”

“Forgive me”

“Why would I--” Patton was cut off by his own screaming. Roman kicked him off the ledge and sent him flying to the ground. Once Patton was in the air, Roman immediately jumped off the ledge. He hope that because neither man was on a sensor, the pictures would go back to blank.

Roman’s plan almost worked.

The only problem was that he waited a second to make sure Patton was off the ledge, that secure his picture on every pocket. It didn’t matter that he jumped, it didn’t matter that he was currently climbing out of the roulette wheel with Patton.

The ball landed on a pocket with his picture. He was chosen to be Bowceit’s husband.

Bowceit’s booming voice sent a shiver down his spine “Congratulations Roman! You are tonight’s winner!” A claw suddenly grabbed Roman and dragged him to Bowceit. Patton grabbed Roman’s hand and tried to pull him away but it was no use. Patton went tumbling backwards and Roman was struggling against Bowceit’s grip. Bowceit Jr. used his tail to press a button and the ball that held Valerie went tumbling towards Patton. It open once it was right in front of the prince and open. Patton quickly helped her out of it.

Bowceit chuckled “It has been a pleasure playing with you but we must be going!” Bowceit paused and exchanged a smirk with  “Oh what the heck, one more game.” Wendy pulled a level and the roulette wheel disappeared. Suddenly, three walls appeared around Patton and Valerie. The walls got close enough that the prince and the mayor were touching shoulders. The walls began to move and pushed them towards the edge. Patton ran to the edge to see what their doom was only to jump back.

Apparently Bowceit decided that they would be trapped on a mechanical floating island, high above the ground.

Patton pressed his back against the wall, panic swelling up in him again. This was his worst nightmare come true.

~

Bowceit dragged Roman to the chapel, Roman noticed that it definitely had been moved. Bowceit placed him in the back of the church where there were chains waited for Roman.

Roman rolled his eyes ‘You sure had everything planned out, didn’t you?”

Bowceit laughed “Of course I did! I had a partner. Lady Luck was the integral part to my plan.”

Roman raised an eyebrow “And what does that mean?”

Bowceit locked the chains around Roman’s limbs “You see, I was expecting you to escape as quickly as possible and Patton would be chosen. But, I should have expected that you would sacrifice yourself. It was a 50/50 chance really.”

Roman was shocked “Y-You really didn’t know…?” Bowceit smirked “It’s called a gamble my dear.” Bowceit ran to the front, extending Roman’s chains so that they reached the other end of the chapel. He pulled out a pair of dice “I lied before, this is the final game.”

~

Logan and Virgil arrived at Bowceit’s castle as there was only about three feet of flooring under Patton and Valerie.

Logan was horrified “PATTON! VALERIE!”

“LOGAN! VIRGIL!”

“YOU TWO ARE GOING TO HAVE TO JUMP!”

Patton shook his head “Jump?! Are you crazy?!” There was two feet left when Patton patted his his sides out of nervousness. It was then he felt his umbrella was, after everything that happened, still attached to belt. Feeling it in his hands, his confidence returned. Opening it, Patton took Valerie’s hand and jumped. The umbrella caused them to float down slowly. Patton locked eyes with Logan and suddenly got an absolutely crazy idea in him mind.

Patton spoke softly “Valerie, could you please take the umbrella?”

Valerie nodded. Once she got one hand securely on the umbrella, Patton let go entirely. He found himself smiling. He wasn’t scared, he was excited. Within seconds, he was safely in Logan’s arms, like he knew he would land.

Logan pressed his forehead against Patton and whispered “That was crazy.”

Patton giggled “people do crazy things when they’re in love.”

Logan gently placed Patton on his own two feet. “I hope this means we are, as the kids say, ‘officially gucci’?”

Patton laughed and kissed Logan’s cheek. “Of course.”

Virgil made sure Valerie was securely on the ground before running around, looking for Roman. Patton moved away from logan and spoke sadly ‘Roman was taken by Bowceit.”

Virgil paused his pacing. ‘What direction?”

Patton pointed to the balcony and that was all Virgil needed. He used the flying Koopas as makeshift stairs that lead him straight to the chapel.

Logan found a hiding spot for Patton and Valerie before following Virgil. Patton and Valerie only had to exchange a look before they ran after the brothers to help them save Roman.

~

Roman was truly in hell. Bowceit didn’t even let him go down the aisle on his own accord. With each roll of the dice, Roman was pulled forcefully towards the altar, the chains digging into his wrists. It took Bowceit rolling an 11, a 15 and a 5 to get him to the altar. Clearly the dices had been rigged.

The Koopa who was being the priest began to speak. “Dearly beloveds, we are gathered today in the presence of these witnesses to join this king and this prince in Holy Matrimony. If anyone objects to this union, speak now or forever hold your peace.”

Both Bowceit and Roman looked at the door. They waited a few moments but nothing happened.

Bowceit threw his head back in joy “Ha! Looks like your little hero isn’t coming! Looks like he really like that girl more than you.”

Roman growled but looked down, he wasn’t going to allow himself to be tricked by Bowceit’s words once again. Though, he couldn’t just ignore than aching feeling in his chest. It was so loud, he could barely hear what the Koopa was saying.

“And now for the rings.”

Virgil kicked open the chapel down “RING, RING! GET AWAY FROM MY MAN BITCH!”

Roman sighed happily, hearts practically forming around him as he cupped his own face. Bowceit rolled his eyes “THAT DIDN’T EVEN RHYME!”

Needless to say, the fight ended just as Valerie and Patton appeared at the chapel.

Virgil undid the chains and looked at Roman, slightly unsure of what to say or do. “A-Are you okay?” Roman responding by tackling Virgil and kissing him passionately repeatedly.

~

Once Roman released Virgil from the onslaught of kisses and apologizes, Valerie embraced the princes.

“I’m so glad you two are alright, I can’t believe you guys go through that on the weekly.”

The princes happily hugged her back. “It’s nothing, we’re sorry you got dragged into it.” Roman spoke confidently.

Patton nodded “And if it’s any consolation, we would like to spend some time with you, to get to know you truly.”

Valerie wrapped her arms around each of their shoulders “I would love that. In fact, I have plenty of embarrassing stories to tell you two about your heroes.”

Patton and Roman exchanged smirks much to their boyfriends’ dismay. She truly was a keeper.

~

Tag list:

@corkeecoderyt @Per-seph-o-nee @Ohshrekmyheck @3milystuff  @Asymmetricalgarbage8888   @fairytailtwists  @sanders-sides-rebloger  @sanderssidesfluffyangst  @unikornavenger @0callmevirge0 @gloomingwitch @roxiefox24 @ijustreallylovesanderssides @unisaurioamorfo

[not-a-gotham-villain]

Part 2

TW: Death, Extreme violence, slight swearing, Guns, Kinves

(i cant do under the cut on mobile so be ready to scroll sorry..)

Her broken Jaguar mask works surprisingly well considering what it's been through. Perhaps it's because whoever sees her face now doesn't live to tell the tale. She can only think of one time anyone got away alive seeing her face over the past Three days.

She had walked her way into the iceberg lounge an hour before penguin hightailed it out because her tip line had gone cold and she could feel how close she was to finding Falcone. Needless to say, Penguin was not happy to see her.

"Ah, Jaguar! Long time no see my dear!" His voice was condescending and his men were armed. "I've heard you've caused quite ruckus all around town recently. Any reason you've stopped by?"

"Buzz off Penguin. I'm not here to kill your goons."

"Character development." Nygma quipped. He was seriously unnecessary and proved to test Jade's already thin patience.

"I just need information. My wells gone... dry." she ground out.

Penguin huffed a laugh before he relaxed his guards and gestured Jade to sit next to him. She refused.

"Falcones at 213 30 Primrose street. Red warehouse."

".....how did you know who i was after?" Jade asked.

"Because i've worked with you since you were definitely not 17, and the only person you ever talked about was him. I did the math."

Jade's eyes narrowed as she collected her things. "You aren't gonna try and stop me, are you?"

Penguin laughed, a little bitterly, a little mockingly. "I'm not sentimental dearie. I will say though," his face got deadly serious then "that his son's died. You two are the only ones left."

Jade stared at penguin for a bit before heading for the door.

"Just for the record, Im sorry Jade. I truly am. Most of us had no idea." Penguin said it a way so plaintively he could have almost mean it.

Jade slammed the door shut on her way out.

☠︎

Falcone's private room security is painfully understaffed. A single man, a whisp really, stands outside his office door.

"What's your name kid?"

Jade resents that.

"Jade Dawes."

"Really? Ya know that used to be a DA's name. Till we bumped him and his family off. You knew him?"

Jade really resents that.

"A little."

He gives her a look before searching through a clipboard, as if Falcone was a legitimate buissness man and not a Class-S Mob Boss. Jesus, she was already planning on killing the guy but he's just making it too easy.

"You got an appointment?"

"Yeah. Five years in the making."

"Wha-"

The silenced bullet goes cleanly through airheads brain. She wasn't really planning on killing him, but everyone else in the buildings dead, so she guesses due diligence won't hurt.

The door opens as millions of others close.

"Janessa. Pleasant surprise. Please do sit down." The man who says the name she hasn't heard in five years looks the same now as he did then. Falcone is still tall, and lean, and his voice still reminds her of beach houses in the summer, before her father had found out about his job and their lives had gone to hell.

"I'm not here to talk Uncle Carmine." She hopes the title comes off as mocking. From the way he reacts, it does. "You know what I'm here for."

Falcone stares at her for a few more seconds before he sighs deep and turns away from his windowed perch towards her.

"Will this" he gestures to her aimed gun with his bourbon "really accomplish what you want Janessa?"

"It doesn't matter what I want." She lies "Its what you deserve." He's far enough away so that she doesn't need to strain her head too much to see his face.

"We are the only ones left little one. Your family is long gone. So is my wife. Mario died Saturday night. If you were to do this, you would be all alone." He's taking languid steps her way, and with each one she feels smaller and younger.

"You killed my family Carmine." She sets her jaw in determination.

"And your family locked away mine, an eye for an eye my dear."

"You shot them right in front of me! You burnt their bodies in a pile! I can't even go near restaurants without -"

She cuts herself off, her voice beginning to shake.

"Piccola, that is why we must start over. Live a new life. Be like my daughter again. Don't you remember how it could be?"

Unbidden, memories of a lifetime ago crop up. She remembers sitting silently at the beach, just seven years old, watching as uncle Carmine taught her how to make a drip sand castle. She remembers thinking he was the greatest man she'd ever seen, right after her dad. Her heart sinks.

"That-that can't happen now. We're-it's-it's all too far gone." Falcone is right up in front of her now. She feels seven years old again next to his six foot three.

He sighs again, and places a hand on her shoulder. She thinks she might cry.

"Well then my dear, do you think we should get it all done with together? After all, what did you have planned for after you killed me?" He points his gun to her temple and her gun to his own.

Jade is silent. Her head is racing. She needs to decide.

Needless to say, she doesn't get to.

Glass shatters everyone, and Falcone is pushed out of her line of sight by something large and black. Upon further inspection she realizes it's Batman. If Jade was in any physical or emotional capacity to she would scream.

"Get away from her you slimy bastard!"

They tussle for a while, a second, a minute, an hour, forty days and forty nights? She can't tell. However eventually Falcone's gun is confiscated by the more powerful Batman and the former is left slumped on the floor, defeated.

"You should let her decide who to go with, Dark Knight." They must have had some important conversation about Jade's autonomy while she was out.

The Bat tenses again, starting at the hands and working up to his temple and then down again. It's strange, being able to see the Batman in full detail. She never got to catalog his responses to jabs or taunts. Yes, she's worked with Batman before, but at the time he was more concerned with Tori's stubborn demands to join then properly introducing himself to Jade. (The green beast whose name she refuses to say spins in her stomach at a very inconvenient time)

"Fine." The Batman spits out. "Jade, what do you want to do?" His voice is paradoxically soft and terse.

"How—how did you find me?" It's not what she meant to say, but it works. "Were-were you tracking me?!"

The responding silence should make her feel indignant, however she is also feeling very overwhelmed.

"He does that often piccola, no respect for personal privacy." Falcone makes no effort to move, slumped up against the wall. His arm is covering his stomach, he's bleeding.

"You stabbed him!" Jade's voice comes out more panicked then she wanted.

"Come here la mia piccola farfalla."

"Jade.." Batman says.

Jade ignores him.

"Zio.." her italian's a little rusty, but she seems to get the message across.

"Listen my little butterfly. We must move on from this." He places a calloused hand on her cheek. "My empire is all but collapsed now, thanks in part to you. Come with me, we can rebuild in Italy, or perhaps just live. You can find a good husband and settle down. I could finally have grandchildren. Please, let me be your Uncle again."

Jade is shaking like a leaf now and she prays she isn't going to cry. "I can't Zio, not after what you did."

Falcone sighs "Well, thats alright, I was going to die anyways."

Jade feels more than see's the knife slip out of his pocket. She acts on instinct, and before Batman can say anything there are three shots ringing out into the night.

Falcones hand goes limp, and falls to the floor.

Jade does the only thing she can do in this situation. She screams.

☠︎

Jade can't tell how long she screamed before she started to sob, but it must have been a long time, because she doesn't get her senses back until she's speeding down an avenue in the Batcar.

She thinks she remember him carrying her. Is she really that light now? She must be, she cant remember the last time she ate.

"Ah. You're awake. I'm getting you to your apartment, but I'm going to be stripping it out. All your identifying objects need to go, otherwise the gangs will track you."

Batman wont look at her, but she thinks he looks the tiredest she's ever seen him.

"Why?" she can't form anymore words than that. He seems to understand.

"With the stunt you've pulled over the last few days, the crime families will be worse than ever trying to fix themselves up, and they'll be aching for blood. So no more Vigilante work of any sort, no more crime, hell, don't go out without asking me first. I'll set up an allowance so you can quit your job, and I'll drop off some old clothes of the robins for you to wear. Jaguar and NightFawn are dead, you hear me?"

She sits silently, taking in the new information. She can't feel anything.

"Am I adopted?"

Batman laughs. "Not exactly." They pull up to her apartment complex's fire escapes. "You're almost home." He walks out of the drivers side and circles over to pick Jade up out of the passengers seat. She'd be embarrassed if she wasn't so empty.

"I don't have a home." She says. She's still crying, she doesn't know why.

"You will one day kid, you will."

[sugarcoated-pain]

Heavy Rotation-Part Two

Alright guys, I know it’s been a while but I’ve finally finished Part Two of my series, Heavy Rotation. 

Best Friends to Lovers (eventually) trope- original character + Ashton 

Part One

Warnings: Cussing and drinking. I think that’s about it though. 

Another giant thanks to my homegirl @sublimehood for helping again! 

“Come on, guys! Just one more game!” I beg, bouncing on the loveseat next to Ashton. I'm sitting cross-legged with my knee against his thigh and he has not moved away. I take small victories where I can get them. In the three months I've lived with these guys, I've started a little game I secretly like to call 'how much can I flirt with Ashton without anybody noticing’.

“No fucking way. Absolutely not.” Calum replies as he abandons his place on the couch next to Georgia to get another beer.

“You kicked our asses FOURTEEN times! Why the hell would we keep playing?” Mikey declares indignantly, tossing the Wii controller on the coffee table.

“Yeah I’m fucking done.” Luke chimes in.

“Don’t be sore losers. It’s very unattractive.” I add condescendingly, eliciting a chuckle from Georgia.

Ashton takes a swig off of his beer before contributing to the conversation, “I’m still playing. I came THIS fucking close to winning last round! But you have to change your character this time. No more ‘Lucky Luigi’. “ he mocks, “and we’re doing Battle Mode.”

“Deal!”

Just as the next round starts, I hear a knock at the door.

“I’ll get it.” Mikey says as he jumps up to answer the door. “Oh. Hey Camille, come on in.” Oh, NOW he moves his leg. Typical.

“Hey babe! What're you doin here?”Ashton asks, pausing the game and standing up to greet her.  

“Uh, you said we could go to the club tonight, remember?” She shoots me a glare, potentially having noticed how close he and I were just sitting. I roll my eyes and unpause the game while Ashton is distracted and proceed to kick his ass.

“GODDAMNIT EMMA! You little shit!” He laughs “Come on, not cool!” He shouts, grabbing his Wii controller and pausing it once again. “The club, that's right, “ he adds, hearing Camille's impatient huff as she crosses her arms. “Yeah no problem, let me just get changed. You guys wanna come?” He asks the room at large. To Camille’s clear delight, no one else was interested.

The two of them were gone within fifteen minutes, and it wasn’t long after when Luke and Michael retreated to their rooms. I continue playing Mario Kart with Georgia while Calum rests his feet in her lap, leaning back on the couch and browsing aimlessly on his cell phone.

“BRB.” Cal says, eliciting an eye roll from myself and Georgia, as he gets up and heads down the hall to the bathroom.

No sooner do we hear the door close than Georgia pauses the game and rounds on me. “Alright, spill.” She demands.

“Uh.. you're gonna need to be a little more specific.”

“You and Ashton! Something is definitely happening between the two of you...” Georgia watches me with intrigue as an excited grin passes over her face.

I unpause the game nonchalantly. “I have absolutely no idea what you're talking about.”

“Oh come on, Em!” She pauses the game yet again. “I know you better than that by now. You can trust me.”

I sigh, and look around the room to make sure no one else is around. “Okay. Fine. I may or may not have ...slightly more than platonic feelings for him...” Georgia lets out an excited squeal, but I cut her off before she can say anything “BUT. I have no intention of ever acting on this. He has a girlfriend and I am not here for guys. I am here to make music and I'm not letting anybody distract me.”

“Seriously?! 'His girlfriend’ is awful and you know it. He deserves WAY better than her. And what if he feels the same way you do?”

“What if who feels the same way?” Of course Calum walks back into the room at that exact moment. He makes his way back to his spot on the couch, eyeing us both curiously.

“NOBODY!” I shout a little too quickly, glaring at Georgia, who is now wide eyed and holding her hands over her mouth.

He grins mischievously and leans closer to her while watching me curiously.  “Nope. I'm not buyin it. I know what I heard. Come on. I'll get it out of her sooner or later so you might as well just tell me…”

Georgia looks like she's about to explode. “UGH fine!” I snap and bury my head in my hands.

“EMMA HAS FEELINGS FOR ASHTON!” she whisper-shouts excitedly, bouncing a little as she says it.

Calum grins. “Excellent! Let's call him and tell him right now. I bet he dumps that dumb bitch on the spot!”

“NO! ABSOLUTELY NOT! He cannot find out! Do you understand me?? Neither one of you can ever speak a word or this!” I demand frantically.

“Emma, he's my best friend. I can't NOT tell him something like this.” He replies, pulling out his cell phone.

I immediately slap it out of his hand and onto the floor. “I'm dead serious. He is currently in a relationship and I, on the other hand, am not looking for a relationship. Ashton can't ever find out. Nobody can. PLEASE. I'm begging you.”

They exchange a look. “Fine, I won't say anything.” Cal replies with a huff, glaring at me angrily as he reaches to pick up his phone.

“But Em, I know you don't really want to be single forever.. don't you ever get lonely?” Georgia asks.

“That's what Tinder is for. I'm not interested in anything more than a one night stand right now, and roommates slash best friends are NOT one night stand material.” I pick my cell phone up off the coffee table and start to get up. “I'm going to bed, but please promise me you will keep this between us?” They both nod.

Once in my room, I plop onto my bed with a deep sigh. Guess I took my little game too far, but no more. It’s time to get serious and stop daydreaming about the guy across the hall. No more flirting. No more touching. It’s music time. I grab my favorite journal that has my best song lyrics written in it, and climb out my window onto the fire escape. In my first week in the apartment, I discovered one of my favorite places in the whole world : our rooftop. With a perfect view of the LA skyline, it is by far the best place in this building for song writing. There isn't a ton of space up there, just room for a couple of people comfortably. I found that out in my second week here when I went up there only to discover I'm not the only one who uses this hideout. Ashton was already sitting there, but he let me join him. And of course, we talked music, cracked stupid jokes, shared a joint, and had deep philosophical conversations for hours- the usual “just friends” stuff, right?

I was glad to know he wouldn't be up there tonight though. I needed my rooftop spot for thinking and writing. With my favorite fuzzy throw blanket around my shoulders, I start writing. All my thoughts and emotions from the day easily flow out of me, through my lucky red gel pen and onto the paper. Lately, my writing has mostly revolved around my feelings for two things: my dramatic change in scenery, and Ashton. I hold it back and fight it off as best as I can in the daylight, but up here alone, I can’t help writing about him. What can I say, he seems to be my muse. After I’m completely drained of words and energy, I head back down the fire escape to go to bed.

The next day starts out the same as any other.  Camille stayed over and is walking around in one of Ashton’s shirts and little else, which makes me sick to my stomach so I avoid the kitchen at all costs until it’s time to head downstairs for work. It’s my turn to open the record store. Everybody else will probably wander down whenever they feel like it. Joys of being the newbie.

I go through the opening checklist that the guys made for me, and finally open the doors. It's a Saturday so we will probably be busy later in the day, but nobody is ever here first thing in the morning. I wander around hunting for busy work to do, but eventually end up sitting behind the counter doodling on receipt paper. After a while, Luke comes down to start his shift in the store, and I see that someone has opened up the recording studio.

As one would expect, my obsession with that studio has only grown in the time I've been there. Once Luke gets settled, I casually wander through that heavy purple curtain, under the guise of making sure the trash cans were emptied the night before. Ashton is already helping some random musician nobody has ever heard of record their album. I'm fascinated by everything happening in the room- the buttons, the knobs,the lights, the flawless human being operating them all so effortlessly.

“Oh! Hey Em. I didn't see ya there.” His voice breaks me from my trance.

“Morning.. I'm just .. uh.. just making sure the trash was taken out in here last night…” I reply as I quickly grab the nearest can.

“Bullshit. I watched you empty them last night.” Ashton chuckles. “You're just trying to get close to the board again to see how it works….”

“Yep. That's definitely all I was looking at. You caught me..”

“Well, come on then.” He motions for me to take the chair next to him.

“Seriously?!”

“Yeah. This is a pretty easy client. Good one for you to learn on. Sit down.” I hop over to the empty swivel chair excitedly. Ashton shakes his head with a small laugh at my enthusiasm, and then begins talking through the different steps in the process. I force myself to concentrate on the words he is telling me, and not the way his perfect hazel eyes light up when he talks about something he's really passionate about.

After about thirty minutes, Luke frantically pops his head into the studio. “There you are! Come on, Emma, I’m gettin my ass kicked out here!”

“Oops sorry!” I bounce up quickly to follow him out, before turning back to Ashton. “Hey thanks for showin me this stuff.. It was awesome.”

He smiles. “Anytime.”

My shift goes by in a blur after that. Any moments not involving customers are spent daydreaming about my time with Ashton this morning. That nagging part of my brain that knows he’s off limits tries to stop me, but I can’t help myself. He was so sweet and patient with me today. Since I’ve gotten here, Ash has definitely been the most interested in my music and the most supportive on my path to learn more about the music industry in general. I know by now that this is just the type of guy he is, but there is another part of me that wishes it was more than that.

The guys have band practice scheduled that evening. There’s a small, old warehouse attached to the back of the store that Liz let’s them practice in. They’re pretty good together but their practices are entertaining as hell to sit in on. Georgia and I have started bringing snacks and booze to watch. We even recently made a drinking game out of some of the stuff that regularly happens. I lay out a blanket on the floor for us to sit on and start setting up camp while Georgia playfully feeds popcorn to Calum while he’s getting ready. They’re so cute I could puke.

“Hey G, first shot of the game. Mikey’s late again.” I say as I pour cheap vodka into two dixie cups. Georgia takes hers as she sits down next to me on the blanket.

“Cheers.” she says, holding it out as if to toast. I clank my plastic cup to hers and down it in one quick motion.

Michael finally shows up and practice begins. I pour white wine into two red solo cups for Georgia and I.

Relaxing a bit as they finally start playing, I find a comfortable sitting position and take in the music. They're actually getting better, even in just the few months I've been here. But what I really love about their practices is how passionate they all are about their music, particularly Ashton. The way he moves when playing the drums, the intensity in his face. It's mesmerising.

“I've got an idea for another one..” Georgia says in a low tone with a mischievous grin, leaning closer to me. “YOU have to take a drink every time I catch you checking Ashton out.”

“GODDAMNIT GEORGIA!” It's meant to be a whisper but it comes out as more of a hiss, as I look around frantically making sure nobody else heard her.

She laughs, “Actually, make it a shot this time. You were practically drooling.”

As I pour another shot into my dixie cup, I glare at her. “I hate you.” Georgia laughs again as I throw back my shot.

Practice continues and I make an extra effort not to look at Ashton. This is apparently an impossible task for me at this point. His energy on that drum kit is like a black hole sucking me in. I try to find other things to focus on. I stare at Luke for a while. He’s pretty enough to keep my attention, right?

“OH! Luke touched his hair. Take a drink.” I say. Georgia and I both drink.

“And now Ashton is drumming on something that isn’t his drums. Drink.” Georgia said, smirking in my direction.

“Are you purposely drawing my attention to him drumming on his thighs so I have to drink AGAIN?” I shake my head and take another drink while she laughs at me as the guys start playing their next song. Within a matter of seconds, I realize I don’t recognize it. I’ve been overly familiar with all the covers they usually play, and now know the couple of originals they’ve thrown in but this one is different.

“Is this an original?” I ask Georgia curiously.

“I guess so.” She shrugs.

It’s surprisingly good. I’m actually genuinely enjoying this song. It’s heartfelt and emotional, raw even. It has a different feel than most of the other songs they play, but in a really good way. They stop a couple times during the song to discuss aspects of it, and I can tell they aren’t completely happy with it, particularly Ashton.

“There’s just something about the bridge that didn’t feel right.” He says, tapping his drumstick absentmindedly on his knee, as he often does when he’s thinking. They continue debating it for a couple minutes, struggling to agree with what was missing from the sound.

“For the bridge, what if you switch the vocals only to a minor key, but keep the guitar in major?” I chime in loudly. Everybody stops talking and turns to me.

“What?!” Luke asks, apparently stunned that I would speak up during their sacred practice.

“No that’s actually a REALLY good idea. You up for trying it, Luke?” Ashton asks, with a quick smile at me. I really hope I’m not blushing but I’m almost positive I am. Luke shrugs. They start the bridge over, but this time with Luke singing the lead in a minor key. It sounds a million times better, or maybe I’m biased. Georgia turns to me, completely impressed. They finish the song, and Ashton is beaming at me. The other guys nod their approval, looks of mild shock on their faces. They all thank me and compliment me on the idea.

When they’re all finished, Ashton walks over to me. “That was seriously a genius tip.”

“Ha. Thanks. It was already an excellent song, just needed a little tweak.” I shrug, hoping again I’m not fucking blushing.

“You really like it? That means a lot. I wrote this one.”

“I’m not surprised at all.” I say quickly under my breath.  

“What is that supposed to mean?” He asks with a curious smirk.

“Never mind.” I answer as I finish packing up our little picnic site to head back upstairs.

Part Three

Part Four

Part Five

Part Six

Part Seven

Part Eight