#what do you mean your retirement plan is to kill yourself once you can't work to support yourself anymore what is wrong with you

[sleepfight]

Really want to write something where Ashur puts his foot in his mouth in a way that emphasizes the enormous social/class gulf between him and Tarquin and forces him to sit with the discomfort of being so disconnected from the struggles of regular people who put their faith in him.

[hangezoeenthusiast]

You failed me

multiple x gn!reader

word count: 2,524

warnings: cursing, yelling, arguing, death, angst, blood, explosion, the egg (it deserves its own warning)

synopis: you guys failed me(us)

(the lyrics go with each person, might not get everyone, and also xd’s part is kinda wonky)

song: rät by penelope scott

I come from scientists and atheists and white men who kill God They make technology, high quality, complex physiological Experiments and sacrilege in the name of public good They taught me everything, just like a daddy should

Quackity, Karl, George, and Sapnap left you. Your mentors, your friends. The ones who taught you everything you knew. They went to build their little “Kinoko Kingdom” while you stayed in the ruins, the dust. “They’ll regret that.” you swore. You built something better, something greater.

It was called “Las Nevadas”. A place where everyone was allowed. They would remember not to fuck with you. They would soon realize that they should watch their back for the rest of their short, stupid lives.

“Watch out, you guys, I'm watching your every move.”

And you were beautiful and vulnerable and power and success God damn, I fell for you, your flamethrowers, your tunnels, and your tech I studied code because I wanted to do something great like you And the real tragеdy is half of it was true

Wilbur majorly fucked up. He was supposed to be with you to the end, your guys’ country, right? No. He left you behind. He went to find peace, find his heaven, while you stayed on earth, wallowing away until your flesh seeped off your rattling bones, rotting away by yourself, with no one to bare witness.

“Why didn’t you bring me with you Wilbur?” you asked his stupid grave on top of the once L’Manburg. “Why did you get the ecstasy, why do I get the remains?”

“I’m coming for you Wilbur, and when I do, we are going to wreck upon justice on everyone who wronged us, wronged you, they will feel our wrath.”

But we've been fuckin' mеan, we're elitist, we're as flawed as any church And this faux-rad West coast dogma has a higher fuckin' net worth I bit the apple 'cause I trusted you, it tastes like Thomas Malthus Your proposal is immodest and insane And I hope someday Selmers rides her fuckin' train

"Y/n!" Technoblade yelled. "I TRUSTED YOU, AND YOU BETRAYED ME, FOR WHAT, TO BLOW UP A STUPID COUNTRY, A COUNTRY THAT WAS DOOMED TO FAIL FROM THE START." He started to battle you, missing every single swing, blinded by fury.

“YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO BE ON MY SIDE.”

"LOOK AT ME GODDAMN IT."

You looked up at him in the eyes and boldly said, "No, Techno, don’t you see, you’re in the wrong here, you’re the one who betrayed me." You were blinded by friendship, you couldn’t see that Tommy had betrayed Techno, and that what the Butcher Army did to Techno was terrible.

"What do you mean Y/n, you know what they did, they wronged me, they used me, they tortured me, they gave me hell, so I gave it back to them, I destroyed the things they loved, the people they loved, you see Y/n, those who have treated me with kindness I will repay that kindness tenfold, and those who treat me with injustice, that use me, that hunt me down, that hurt my friends, I shall repay that injustice a thousand times over, do you understand?"

"No I don't, Techno, you can't do this.” you begged. He pushed you out of the way, "Get out of my way Y/n." “No, I won’t, I won’t let you destroy everything we worked for.”

“Well, then I have to fight you.”

And thus the battle began, Swords clashing against each other, blood spilling from open wounds, friends digging each other into a whole both of them couldn’t get out of. Techno was letting you off easy, he knew his strength, he knew that he could’ve beaten you in one swipe, but he didn’t want to kill you.

So when you had the opportunity, you swept from under his feet, and knocked him down. You placed your blade onto his neck, pressing down until a little drop of blood appeared, “Stay down Technoblade, or I’ll do something worse than try to put you on trial.”

He watched as you walked away from him, trying to save L’Manberg from a worst fate than death itself.

“One day Y/n, you’ll see, I’m on your side.”

I loved you, I loved you, I loved you, it's true I wanted to be you and do what you do I lived here, I loved here, I bought it, it's true I feel so stupid, and so used I feel so used

"Why would you do that Dream? You didn't have to do that." you interrogated. Dream had stupidly blew up the community house. You both didn't plan that, he had gone behind your back. "I had to Y/n, you wouldn't understand."

"What do you mean I don't understand, you went against my back, we were supposed to-" you cut off yourself, "Dream, don't you understand, you did something stupid, and what did you get, you got stupid jail." "The reason I did that is because I needed to isolate myself from humanity." he said, proudness lacing his words.

"What do you mean?" you questioned. "If anyone knows I can revive people, I'm screwed, so that's why I need to be by myself, yeah it sucks major ass, but at least no one else will know, well, besides you anyways." "I have a task for you Y/n/n, I need you to find a way to bring Tommy and Ghostbur in here."

"Why Dream?"

"I'm going to revive Wilbur."

I was your baby, your firstborn, the hot girl in your comp-sci class And I was Darwin's prep school dream, bred, born and raised to kick your ass I fell for circuit boards, rocket ships, pictures of the stars If you could only be what you pretend you are

"PHILZA MINECRAFT COME BACK HERE." you were chasing Phil, through the woody forest, covered by oak trees. He had information on Technoblade's whereabouts and you needed it. You chased him with your enchanted netherite armor, netherite sword and axe, and a few op potions. Your goal was to capture Philza and interrogate him on where Techno's place was. The thing was, you were his child. His own child trying to kill his own son.

He felt betrayed, his own child turned against him and their brother, their family. "The Butcher Army must've gotten to you somehow." he thought in his head. Surely, his darling Y/n didn't do it on their own will, right?

He was incorrect, you did it because you believed that Techno needed to be brought to justice, by punishment. You believed that your own sibling needed to die, because he was a "liability" to L'Manberg's growth and future. He needed to die because as long as he would live his long life with his little enderman Edward, retired, he would still cause trouble to everything you, Quackity, Tubbo, Fundy, and Ranboo had built.

He pleaded, "Stop Y/n, you don't have to do this." You argued, "I do Philza, as long as he lives, my plans for L'Manberg will forever cease to exist."

He felt like shit, you called him Philza, not Dadza, or Dad, or anything besides his normal name. "Did I screw something up?" he asked himself quietly under his breath. "Yes you did Phil, you took the traitor's side." you had heard Phil mumble.

"HE'S NOT A TRAITOR." Phil yelled at you. "Yes he is, he deserves what he is about to get, I will say it again, where is his base?"

"I'm not saying, Y/n, why are you doing this, Techno is your own sibling." "He's not my sibling anymore, that stopped when he destroyed L'Manberg, you're lucky I forgived you." you declared.

"Y/n/n, please don't do this."

"I have to Dadza, I can't let him roam free."

When I said take me to the moon, I never meant take me alone I thought if mankind toured the sky, it meant that all of us could go But I don't want to see the stars if they're just one more piece of land For us to colonize, for us to turn to sand

Bad had tried to convice you to join the Eggpire. You had no effect while being next to the egg, and he had to take you out. People who had no effect towards the egg had to be eliminated.

He was creepily following you, waiting until you stopped to get a chance to capture you. He had hope that you did have an effect, that you would join the Egg with him. He didn't want to kill you, you were his best friend, besides Skeppy of course.

"Come back here Y/n." he said. "No chance in hell Bad, get the fuck away from me." "HEY, LANGUAGE!" he exclaimed. "No language, get away from me, you're creeping me out."

He threw his trident, spinning in the air, trying to catch up to your frantic steps. You were trying to get to Church Prime, where no one could kill anyone, hopefully Bad would abide to that rule. You were just about to step on Church Prime when you bumped into a hard, armored chest.

You looked up shyly, and saw Punz, with his red eyes reflecting anger. "Where are you going Y/n?" he questioned. "Somewhere." you blankly stated. You were desperate, you didn't want to die, or anything else that Bad was going to do to you. You tried to dodge Punz, but he placed a hand on your shoulder, "Stay right here Y/n."

"No, get away from me, I don't know what's wrong with all of you, but go away, I don't want anything to do with your stupid Eggpire." He raged, and grabbed your wrist heavily, "DON'T TALK ABOUT THE EGG LIKE THAT, IT WILL TAKE CONTROL OF THE SERVER, AND YOU ALL WILL BE ITS SERVANTS." "LET ME THE FUCK GO PUNZ." you screamed. You were wiggling in his grip, trying to escape his lunatic self.

While he was holding you, you saw two other shadows behind you. It was Antfrost and Bad. "What do you guys want from me, I didn't do anything wrong."

"You are against the Egg Y/n, people who are like you and Tommy have to die."

"Well, I'm not dying today." you murmured under your breath. "What was that you said?" Antfrost asked you.

You smirked, "I'm not dying today, I'll tell you one more time, let go of me."

Bad and Antfrost walked closer to you, Punz right behind you, all of them cornering you into a tight spot. "What you going to do about it Y/n, you're cornered."

"You'll know when they get here, but for now, you better run boys."

'Cause we're so fuckin' mean, we're so elitist, we're as fucked as any church And this bullshit West coast dogma has a higher fuckin' net worth I bit the apple 'cause I loved you, and why would you lie? And then I realized that you're just as naïve as I am Oh, you're so traumatized it makes me want to cry

"Tubbo, don't do this." Schlatt had unfortunately found out that you were a spy, that you were on Pogtopia's side. He had ordered Tubbo to kill you with fireworks, to light you on fire, give you blisters all over your body. "Please Tubbs, you're my friend." you pleaded.

"I can't Y/n/n, or something worse will happen." he whispered to you. "What do you mean?" you asked. "He can-" he trailed off, looking somewhere else besides your eyes. "Tubbo, you don't have to do what that stupid bastard tells you to do, you're your own person, with your own thoughts and actions."

"I'm sorry Y/n, I hope you can forgive me."

"TUBBO N-" you was cut off by firewords hitting your skin, making blisters and burn marks all over your body. You lost your second canon life, feeling betrayed by Tubbo. He killed you for what, a stupid father who never cared about him in his entire life, a father who exiled his friends that actually treated him like a person, and not like some random piece of trash.

You respawned in your bed, feeling bruises and bumps mostly on your forearms and your back.

"I'll help you Tubbo, I’ll get rid of him.”

You dumb bitch I loved you, I loved you, I loved you, it's true I wanted to be you and do what you do I lived here, I loved here, I bought it, it's true I'm so embarrassed, I feel abused

“Come on Y/n/n, come with me.” Punz begged of you. He wanted you to visit the Egg. You didn’t want to be controlled by a stupid omelette. "I'm not Punzo, why are you so obsessed with that stupid thing."

"DON'T SPEAK OF THE EGG LIKE THAT."

You put your hands in front of you, accidentally touching Punz's chest, "Ok calm down buddy." He didn't calm down and instead yelled at you on why you had to join the Eggpire.

"If you join, you will be forever happy."

"If you join you'll get whatever you want."

You were tired of the members of the Eggpire to convince you to join them, you didn't like eggs anyway. "Punz, for the last time, I'm not joining you, stop telling me."

“Then you have to die.”

So fuck your tunnels, fuck your cars, fuck your rockets, fuck your cars again You promised you'd be Tesla, but you're just another Edison 'Cause Tesla broke a patent, all you ever broke were hearts I can't believe you tore humanity apart

“XD!” You were pissed at him, he had destroyed your house, made your friends pissed at you, just everything you liked. All because he wanted you for himself.

He wanted you to be dependent on his every word, and he was being a manipulative psychopath. And you didn’t tolerate that, it was like he was his human counterpart, Dream.

He walked to you with confidence, waiting for to get a hug from you, well, he didn’t get that. You slapped him so hard his head swung to the left.

“WHAT THE FUCK.”

“That’s what you get you stupid son of a bitch. You fucking ruined everything.” “Calm down Y/n/n, what is wrong?” He acted concerned, but you knew that he was faking. He would do anything to get someone’s approval.

“DO YOU WANNA KNOW WHAT’S WRONG, IT’S YOU, YOUR STUPID PRESENCE IN MY LIFE. YOU KEEP ON WALKING AROUND LIKE YOU FUCKING OWN THE PLACE.”

“Calm down darling, just take some netheri-” you interrupted him by slapping the ore out of his hands. “I don’t need jack shit from you XD, you know what, take back the necklace, I don’t want it.” You pulled the shiny, green emerald necklace off your neck, and pulled XD’s palm out.

You placed the necklace filled with memories, and put it on his hand. You closed up his palm, and walked away, leaving XD to his own accord.

“We could’ve had evertything X.”

[buggiesbuzzing]

AMARANTH [ c. cullen ]

TITLE :: Amaranth

CHAPTER ZERO :: The Beginning of the End

PAIRING :: Carlisle Cullen x reader, various x reader

GENRE :: Drama

SUMMARY :: Once leading a life of what she seen as relative normality, a sudden change sends poor y/n into a disastrous spiral.

PREVIOUS <

NEXT >

MASTERLIST

Y/n had a normal life, as normal as she could possibly have, and she was happy with the mediocrity. She was rather successful; she was getting married soon, she was working as the personal assistant to a regional manager for some big corporate business and made good money — hell, she even made an effort to reconnect with her parents, before they passed away, that is — she even planned on going to college after getting married so she could pursue a career as a pediatrician. But, of course, life hardly ever goes as planned.

Her life came crashing down towards the beginning of January, during her bachelorette party with a few of her close friends. At first, she hated the idea of having a bachelorette party, but after endless pestering, her friends convinced her to go to a club with them. However, Y/n happened to more introverted and somehow came up with an excuse to hang out in the empty alley behind the club for a breather, and sneaking a secret smoke. She lit the tobacco and inhaled the chemicals, her lungs stinging since she'd abstained from cigarettes for a while. She knew they were toxic to her health, but in overly stressful situations, she would break out the ol' cancer sticks for a bit of relief.

The cool night breeze sent shivers down her spine. She was not wearing the most comfortable winter outfit. Quite frankly, she was freezing her tits off at the chill. The outfit she was in was a pretty small dress with a pair of black boots, revealing a lot of skin, which was borrowed from one of her friends’ closet.

Her cigarette had almost completely burned out when she heard some gravel being kicked around while feet quietly shuffled around on the ground. She became slightly paranoid at the thought of someone being in close proximity to her. She dropped the cigarette butt and stomped out the faltering flame, picking it back up once it was out and tossing it in an outdoor trash bin. When she turned back to see if an animal was causing the little noises, but she was met with a man who had stunningly pale skin and blond hair held up in a ponytail. She was terrified, and her eyes scanned him, looking for any sign of familiarity. Alas, she found none. He was wearing a pair of jeans, but no shirt, which she found strange, especially because it was January and there were flurries of snow falling to the ground.

Y/n had no idea what was going on, but couldn't help the small, scared whimper that she let out when he clamped his cold hand around her mouth with fast, bruising force, ensuring that she couldn't scream out for help. Tears streamed down her cheeks as he sunk his rather sharp teeth into her clavicle. She was terrified, she could only see a glint of red in his eye, before a rush of intense pain coursed through her veins. The blond pulled away from her neck, a bit of red liquid dripping from the corner of his mouth. She choked out a sob and fell to the ground once his hand left her jaw, bare knees hitting the rough, loose gravel.

The doors of the club opened, to reveal a couple of Y/n's girlfriends, worriedly chattering; the stranger darted off, not wanting to be caught. She struggled to stay conscious, her vision becoming worse by the second, black dots spotting her surroundings. She squeaked out a small "help" before collapsing on the ground entirely, the ache still running through her body.

The girls panicked, seeing their dear friend fall unconscious in their peripherals, turning and running toward her. At first, they thought she was a goner, but one of them thought to pull out a small mirror from their purse and stuck it below her nose. Although it was minor, her breathing caused a slight fog on the mirror, letting them know she wasn't dead yet. They let out sighs of relief and did their best to pick up their friend, but the heels they chose to wear were no help to them. Instead of attempting to lug her out and flag down a cab, they focused on trying to find out exactly what happened and who they had to kill for causing this.

One of the girls, Stephanie, looked her up and down, seeing if she had any injuries, and came across a large, bleeding wound on her neck that looked like a bite if you squinted. Stephanie pointed out the spot to the other girl, Lisa, while she fished a makeup wipe out of her purse. She used a wipe to clean up the injury, but Y/n hissed in pain as the wipe made contact with an open part of the wound.

Y/n's eyes opened, and she took a moment to regain herself, pressing her back against the wall of the building. "I. . . I'm gonna go home." She grumbled, bending down to pick up her clutch.

"Are you kidding, Y/n? You need to go to the hospital! That thing on your neck is disgusting!" Stephanie was shocked, she was clearly concerned about the wound, but Y/n didn't seem to care as much.

Lisa chimed in, "It could get infected if you don't get it treated, Y/n, you should have it checked out."

The corner of Y/n's mouth twitched upwards, a weak smile appearing. "Steph, Lis, I can take care of this, it's nothing," It was definitely not nothing. She could feel an ache all throughout her veins and her head felt like it was about to explode. Y/n didn't want them to worry, she knew them all too well and she knew that if the weirdo who bit her gave her some disease they wouldn't stop blaming themselves. "I'll go home, get some bandages and antibiotic ointment, then I'll be good as new. Don't worry."

The girls, very reluctantly, let her go — trusting her instead of arguing with their stubborn friend. "Do you want me to come with? I can help, it's kind of an awkward spot to be fixing up on your own." Stephanie offered.

Y/n shook her head and politely murmured, "No thanks, Steph." They respected her wishes and headed back inside while she caught a cab driving by.

It took only about fifteen minutes for the cab to get her home, opposed to the usual twenty — the driver had seen the dried blood that had stained her skin and decided that it would be best to get there as fast as he could. She thanked the man and paid her fare, plus a hefty tip, before stumbling into her home. It was around midnight when she decided to stop waiting on her fiancé, Tyler, to get home since he was working late, yet again. She dressed her wound in bandages and took some pain killers along with a shot of whiskey to dull the ache, then retired to bed.

The next morning, she felt nothing but the raging pain of her blood coursing through her veins like poison. She swallowed it down with a few shots of hard liquor and her daily medicine. The entire day she was on edge, always looking over her shoulder. She took the day off from work, but her husband hadn't; something about extra paperwork to file before dinner. His parents were coming over to celebrate their engagement over dinner, and although Y/n wasn't feeling good, she wasn't going to up and cancel.

Instead of making a meal, Y/n called a nearby Japanese catering company, ordering a few plates of assorted sushi rolls to be delivered by four o'clock. She didn't worry over the cost, but rather plopped down on the couch, trying to rest before she'd have to deal with her to-be in-laws.

She must've lost track of time because before she knew it, there was a knock at the door, and she was mindlessly getting up to open it. There stood an awkward-looking teen with a few insulated cases in hand. "Ms. L/n?" In response, she nodded and he gestured to a receipt sitting on top of the boxes. "Sign on the dotted line," The delivery boy pulled a blue pen out of his pocket and handed it to her, which she took with hesitation. She signed for the food and took the boxes. "Have a nice day!" He spoke quickly as she shut the door.

"Why can I still smell him? He smells like Frito's dipped in guac," Y/n grimaced, however, the stench made her hungry. "Whatever, I can dig in once they're here." She sighed.

Only moments passed before the door opened, revealing her soon-to-be husband, Tyler, and his parents. Tyler took it upon himself to set the table and help his parents settle in for their stay. Y/n stood in the bathroom, observing her neck and shoulder — whatever used to be there was now but a faint ring mark. Unfortunately, that didn't mean her pain stopped. Thankfully, she had a higher tolerance than most, and a bit of liquor helped.

They were part-way through dinner, and Y/n was picking at her second California roll. She could just barely stand the scents her nose was taking in — and the sushi wasn't the cause. She could separate the smells too; one of them smelt like rotting pears, another was a variation of sour wine, and the final one was by far the one that made her hunger plunge deeper — it was floral, and yet bitter. The sushi was no longer of any interest to Y/n; those smells, though, they were mouthwatering.

"Oh, dear, Y/n," Tyler's mother, Jill, started. "I just don't understand why you couldn't have made the food yourself; then again, you've always been quite a lazy lady." The last part was more of a reminder to herself but still, hurt Y/n nonetheless.

Y/n smiled, but everyone could tell it was fake, and there was nothing but pure rage behind it. "Oh, Jillian, you always critique my cooking skills anyways, so I thought why not save you the trouble and just get food elsewhere." Bitterness seeped from every word she spoke as she glared daggers at Tyler's monster of a mum.

"How thoughtful." The father, Wayne, added, shoving a spicy tuna roll down his gullet.

Jill obviously wasn't happy with the retort and turned to her beloved son. "I can't see why you didn't try to get with that Jessy girl at your office, she was an absolute sweetie; but I guess you like the sour bunch."

Wayne chuckled. "Yeah, if I were in your situation, I'd take the bait," He paused, taking a bite of another sushi roll before speaking up again. "Put in some extra hours, if you know what I mean." He spat, a piece of rice shooting out on his mouth and onto Y/n's nearby plate. Tyler let out a nervous laugh, looking towards his fianceé.

As she got angrier, the smells got more intense and the sound of rhythmic beating and rushing liquid filled her ears. She snapped her eyes shut so she could try to focus, but she just couldn't. Tyler attempted to bring her out of her pained expression with aggressive shoulder tapping, he was met with a push with massive force behind it. Said push sent him hurtling backward into a wall, causing his body to leave a hole in its place before he fell to the ground. Wayne stood up in shock, confused at what had just happened, and something had completely taken Y/n over.

No longer could she ignore her hunger, or the pent up fury within her. She leapt at Wayne, smacking his head against the wall harshly, before looking at Jill, who was going through her purse desperately looking for her Blackberry.

"No phones at the table, Jill." Y/n hissed before, kicking the leg of her chair, snapping the wooden block off, and making Jill fall to the floor.

To Jill, all hope was lost. Within seconds, Y/n fell to the floor and grabbed Jill's arm, biting it. The latter cried out, but Y/n quickly grabbed as much sushi as she could handle and shoved it into her mouth, muffling the screams.

Sharp and strong teeth replaced Y/n's former ones and she mercilessly sucked the blood from Jill's arm. Y/n's eyes had gone dark, and that was all Jill saw before she'd lost a large amount of blood and lost consciousness.

Y/n physically had to rip herself away from her would-be mother-in-law to prevent herself from draining the body completely. Once she had seen what was done, tears streamed down her face. Panic set in, and Y/n stood up and looked around at the mess she made.

Something felt off. Her hands wandered to her mouth, poking at her mouth to realize that her teeth felt much stronger than before and there was a thick layer of blood on her bottom lip. "Holy shit. . ." She gasped, scared of what idea came to mind. "Am I a fucking vampire?"

It sounded even more ridiculous out loud.

Her mind circled back to the blood dribbling down her chin and onto her blouse. What a shame. It was one of her favorites. How was she ever going to rid herself of this mess? This was her house, people in the neighborhood knew her, she would obviously be suspect number one and she had zero idea how to drop off the face of the earth.

Y/n's eyes shifted around the room, looking for some sort of sudden solution to her problems. Sushi, blood, candles, broken wood. . . Candles. . . Fire. She could burn the evidence. Her mind wandered back to the gas canister for her lawnmower; Tyler always kept it full so it would be there when he needed it. She rushed out to the garage, surprised at her speed, and retrieved the red can.

She poured gasoline on the floor, making sure the bodies were doused in the extremely flammable liquid. Let's be honest, if the bodies burnt enough, the police of this town probably wouldn't care enough to look too far into it — they'd most likely mark her off as deceased as well.

She had changed into a pair of thick spandex, a pair of comfortable sneakers, and a hoodie two sizes too large; and at the ripe, late time of '1:27 AM', Y/n snatched one of her lighters and her pack of cigarettes and went outside. She lit a cigarette and took a couple of moments to reminisce. She adored her house, but it could no longer be her home. She wouldn't be safe there, and she couldn't come back. She needed to be far, far away. She couldn't spend a second more there, so she took one last hit and flicked her lit cigarette through the door of the house and took off as flames spread through the house.

Hour, upon hour — they simply passed like minutes. It felt exhilarating to not be tired. She ran all night and the sun was starting to peek over the horizon, soft rays of light filtered through the crowds of trees. She was in a forest of some kind, and she had absolutely no idea where she was. After a couple of minutes of nothing but trees for miles, she stopped.

Somehow she felt absolutely no exhaustion from the obscene amount of physical work she'd just went through. She must've been at least a couple of states away, she should be safe.

tags :: @whattheheckisevengoingon​

[staytiny-angel]

Safe Haven 4/?

Rating: E

Pairings: Drew McIntyre/Becky Lynch, Eventually Drew McIntyre/Becky Lynch/Seth Rollins, Jon Moxley/Renee Young, Sasha Banks/Bayley/Charlotte Flair, Mandy Rose/Trent Seven, Jordan Devlin/Millie McKenzie, Ruby Riott/Liv Morgan

Warnings for this Chapter: mentions of violence

Chapter Summary: Drew and Becky get to know their new mate better while meeting members of his unorthodox family, Plans are made to rescue Roman from Heyman's evil clutches.

Taglist:

@hitory--chan @sethsevolution @finnsauroraborealis @the-beastslayers-queen @pikapuff316 @writinglionqueen @writtingrose

"SETHIE!" Seth hadn't even made it back to town before being tackled by a overly hyperactive blonde girl.

"I missed you too Liv" Seth groaned, slightly out of breath.

"You're lucky I'm here and not Rubes, she's very mad at ya"

Seth grimaced at the thought of seeing his older sister.

"Hey! Redhead!" Liv yelled at Becky. "Is this too basic" she gestured at her hair.

"Um-"

"You're right, too boring" Liv pulled out a compact mirror and smiled at it, Becky and Drew staring in shock as her hair turned bubblegum pink.

"How?" Drew asked Seth.

"Liv's a chaos fairy. Hyper 24/7, pranks everybody. C'mon brat" Liv squealed and hopped onto his back..

"Hey Livvie, Mom conjured my clothes..would you mind?" Seth asked his sister's girlfriend

Drew and Becky watched curiously as the unremarkable clothes Seth's mother had put on him morphed into dark-grey skinny jeans and a blood-red t-shirt.

"Hair too?" the fairy asked

"Yes please."

Seth shook his head and a quarter of it immediately went blond "There ya go Sethie! You look like you again, only bigger!" Liv giggles, patting the wolf on the head.

"Thanks Livvy" Seth grinned. "You're still small though"

"I'm still bigger than Millie!" Liv managed to kick Seth in the hip. "Good luck apologizing to everyone. Trent's mad because you made Tyler cry!"

"Tyler always cries!"

"Okay true, but you also made Mandy upset!"

"How long have you been away from home?" Becky asks

"I haven't lived in Haven in 8 years. I lost contact with everyone 18 months ago." Seth explained

"Dude the only reason we didn't completely lose it was because we still felt you through the pack bond" Liv tells him "We knew you weren't dead but...it was hard, anyway so why are you with the newbies?" Liv asked as they made their way to the main house.

"They're my mates." Seth said simply.

"Oooooh, Sethie's got two mates!" Liv said excitedly. Becky looking at her with caution. "I need to see Sarah, you are making me coffee later!" Liv hugged him and skipped off, Becky and Drew watching her.

"I've only heard of chaos fairies, she was...unique" Becky said.

"I need to remind Ceasero she's not allowed any caffeine" Seth said shaking his head

The three mates walked along the path back to the town in silence after Liv left. None of them really knowing what to say.

"So you guys have had this town for a long time?" Becky finally broke the increasingly uncomfortable tension

"My grandparents founded Haven. Grandfather...used to run a circus and all of the acts were different beings. When he retired, everyone just settled here. Haven was these old fairgrounds and some of the woods surrounding it."

"A Circus?" Drew exclaimed

"Grandfather was a warlock, especially skilled in persuasion and he figured it would be a way for him and his friends to not only use their abilities for profit, but to not have to hide as much. Normies will ignore most Supe shit if they think its a trick"

"Absolutely true, they're dense as hell" Becky replied.

"So, you knew Finn?" Seth asked.

"Sort of, his name was Prince back then, always wondered what happened, not surprised that vampires had something to do with it...when they helped save you. I can't believe I just said that" Becky facepalmed, remembering what Mox and Stephanie had said.

Seth smiled and shook his head "I know Haven is an odd case. Weird even amongst the weird. I mean, I'm the Wolf/Warlock hybrid that claims a Lion, a Witch, a Vampire Queen and a Vampire thats the vessel for a literal demon king for parents. Weird is kinda my thing"

"Do you remember that night?" Becky asked. Seth looked down, toying with his amulet before sitting down.

"A little. I remember being in a car with my mommy and daddy" Seth said in a faraway voice "The was a big flash of light and loud noise, and then I was flying through the woods. I had bite marks on the back of my neck. Knowing now what I know about my bio parents, I think my Mom shifted and was carrying me through the woods by the scruff of my neck."

Becky hesitantly reached over and touched the top of Seth's bowed head. Drew looking on silently. It seemed like his spitfire was already growing attached to the younger man, while Drew himself was more hesitant. Seth lived...by Drew's upbringing, an unnatural life. Haven was a lot to get used to and he'd had Becky to himself for so long.

"Do you think it's possible that your mom changed you?" Drew asked. "To protect you?"

"Could be I don't know" Seth pulled his hair. "I don't like thinking about it"

"Hey brat" A girl said, materializing next to the three. She was holding a coffee cup and had red lowlights and was so pale, Drew thought she could be a vampire.

"Hey, Ruby." Seth said quietly, "Guys this is one of my sisters."

"Yo." The girl greeted them easily and handed her brother the Chicago Bears to-go mug "One Double Chocolate Cappuccino, courtesy of Cesaro. Figured you could use it, heard you haven't had coffee in a year or so."

"No espresso?" Seth groaned.

"You know he puts too much in" Ruby said, "Besides I want to be able to sleep tonight. Your howling was obnoxious" she turned to Drew and Becky. "If either of you hurt my little brother, I will rip out your eyes and shove them down your throats"

"Ruby."

"What it's true. We lost you once, brat. Never again" She replied with a smile

"Did anyone mention that Seth is the baby?" Ruby asked

"Millie is younger then me thank you very much" Seth said rolling his eyes and taking a sip of his drink

"Millie hasn't been missing for 18 months, and gone for 7 and a half years before that. So excuse us if we're all a bit concerned about all this" she says waving a hand at Drew and Becky.

"Excuse me, who's Millie?" Becky asked.

"My baby cousin" Seth replied fondly. "She's my Uncle Shawn's kid"

"She's a fire siren, sneezes out fire like crazy" Ruby added, drinking her coffee.

"She doesn't have much in the way of control yet. So she sets shit on fire a lot...luckily her mate is a water sprite. Jordan is really great st putting out flare-ups" Seth explains "Please don't threaten my mates. Honestly, I'm a hot mess. I doubt they even want to be with me anyway"

"Nonsense" Ruby waved her hand. "Mates are mates always. Do you think I would have gotten with Liv by choice?" Seth chuckled and blushed when Becky smiled at him. " Does anyone know about Ro?" He asked.

Ruby's face fell. "Mom is working on a tracking spell, since you don't remember exactly where Heyman's compound is located. Dad is making her rest before she casts it though so that won't be done until tomorrow, the good this is that Heyman can only do his enslaving curse during the full moon...so we have 6 days to find Ro."

"Fuck" Seth pulled at his hair. "None of this would have happened if I hadn't ran away"

"Stop it" Drew said, gently pulling Seth's hands down.

Drew had sat there quietly listening to the exchange between Seth and his sister, trying to learn more about the odd man the fates had bound him and his firecracker to. From what he'd gathered so far Seth was well-loved by his mismatched pack and had been sorely missed while on his journey of self-discovery.

"Don't beat yourself up. You couldn't have known any of this would happen" Drew says softly, still holding Seth's hands in his larger ones. Seth's brother had been right. Seth did look amazingly...like a slightly smaller version of himself, less so now that part of his hair was platinum blonde.

"He's my big brother" Seth whimpered. "He doesn't even know I'm not mad at him anymore, if Paul's spell works on him, he'll be gone for good" Drew unknowingly wiped away a tear that had trailed down Seth's face.

Becky wrapped her arms around Seth's waist "That isn't going to happen, sweetheart. We are going to get your brother back and Heyman will pay for everything he's done to both of you." She says fiercely. To which Seth nodded but said nothing.

"Forgive me for asking but are you his sister from the witch side or vampire side?" Drew asked Ruby.

"Stephanie and Hunter, can't be around Finn and Violet, my blood is toxic and Bálor hates me" Ruby answered

"I only have one sibling from Finn and Violet and that's Jordan. He's the last of Finn's pre vampiric bloodline. His parents died when he was a baby, and an old woman from his clan brought him to Haven shortly after" Seth tells them.

"Is this the same Jordan that's your cousin's mate?" Becky asked. "Yeah, thought my uncle was gonna kill him, then Finn was gonna kill him" Seth shook his head.

"Haven is completely integrated? " Drew asked, he and Becky hadn't realized just how many different species of Supernatural inhabited the small town.

"Unless they can't be around each other for a physiological reason, yep" Ruby answered "One of our cousins is a sun sprite, and she glows with actual sunlight. So she can't be around Finn and Violet."

"No one gets turned away unless you give our father a reason to" Seth said, "The pack is a family"

[r3b3lgrrrrrrrl]

A LunaTic and her Gunn (Part 15)

"The Coolest!!"

Colson picks up Casi from her grandmothers. "Where'd you go?" She immediately asks him in the car.

He laughs, appreciating his daughter's bluntness. "I went and had lunch with Mommy. I have a friend named Luna and it was important for them to meet each other." He tells her.

"Friend, Dad?" She asks rolling her eyes. "I heard you and Mommy in the kitchen." She starts snaking her head, singing "You gotta a girrrrrlfriend and you're in loooooove." Teasing her dad.

Colson turns red and starts laughing harder. "Yo. She is too fucking grown!!" He thinks to himself.

"You caught me!!" Still laughing "So, what do you think? You wanna meet her?" He asks her.

"Duh!!" She exclaims cocking her upper lip and looking at him like he's crazy.

Still laughing, he asks "You wanna head to LA today and we'll hang out with her tomorrow?".

"Yup!!" She says bouncing in her seat.

"Aight. Think about what you wanna do tomorrow, ya nut!!!" He tells her, laughing as they pull into the driveway.

--------------------------------------------------

Luna's back at Ashley's. It's late, has been a long few days and she's exhausted. She had FaceTimed with Colson after she landed. Him and Casi were on their way back to LA also. They should be landing in another hour. She lays on the bed smoking a bowl and watching Big Mouths, before taking a shower, trying to kill the time. By the time she gets out, Colson has texted that they've landed safely.

"Perfect." She thinks to herself. It's what she'd been waiting for.

Texting back, they make plans for him to pick her up and meet Casi tomorrow. Exchanging good night's and I love yous as Luna climbs into bed.

"Fuck......" Luna thinks to herself. "Should I have gotten her something???" She starts to panic. "What are you gonna give her flowers, you fucking nerd. Chill out, Loons." She tells herself. She misses Colson in bed with her. Too exhausted to worry anymore, she drops into sleep.

--------------------------------------------------

"Why are we at Ashley's? I thought her name was Luna." Casi says, side eyeing her dad as they pull up to the house.

"It is. But Luna lives in NY. She's friends with Ashley, so she's staying here while she's in LA.

"Ooooh." She accepts his answer.

Once at the door, Luna greets them with a huge smile. "Hi! You must be Casie. I'm Luna, it's really nice to meet you." She says bending down slightly and extending her hand. Luna's dressed simply in jeans and a white tee. Her blonde hair pulled up loosly.

Casi reaches out to shake Luna's hand. She smiles when she hears Luna's jewelry jingle like music. "Hi. I like your bracelets."

"Thank you." Luna smiles down at the little girl. She looks at Colson still smiling. "Hi." One look. "How are you?" She asks him.

His dick twitches at her look. "I'm great!" He says beaming. "You ready to go? Cas wants to go bowling."

"Really?" Asks Luna turning her gaze to Casi. "Do you like glow bowling?"

Casi looks at her inquisitivly. "What's that?"

"It is when they shut off all the regular lights, and THEN they turn on really cool different colored ones, like red, blue, green. They even have a magic light that makes anything white GLOW." Luna explains. "It's really neat. They play music and everything."

"Lights like at my dad's shows?" Casi asks.

"Exactly!!!" Luna exclaims. "It's like a bowling concert".

"COOOOOOL!!! CAN WE DO THAT???" Casi asks excitedly looking at her dad.

"Uhhhhhh...." Colson looks at Luna slightly confused and slightly like what the fuck.

Luna nods her head, smiling at Casi "We can." She looks at Colson "There's a spot in The Valley that's 24hrs. It's THE BEST place to bowl in the whole world."

"24hr Glow bowling?" Colson asks Luna. "Why am I just finding out about this now???"

"Guess you just haven't been hanging out with the right people, Bu. Colson." She catches and corrects herself. "Ready?" She looks at Casi excitedly as she throws on her leather and grabs her coffee. She puts on her sunglasses.

Casi's eyes open wide. "They're SO cool." She whispers clasping her hands together.

"My glasses?" Asks Luna.

"Unh hunh." Casi nods her head.

"Do you have any?" Luna asks. Casi shakes her head no. "WELL, my friend, today is your lucky day. I happen to have an outta this world collection of sunglasses. Wanna come up and pick out a pair for yourself?" Luna offers.

Casi's head shoots to Colson. "CAN I DAD!!??" She asks, about to explode. Laughing, Colson nods his head yes. Without a thought, Casi runs up the stairs, Luna following close behind.

"That was cute." Colson thinks to himself watching his girls run up the stairs together. "I don't know what Luna was so worried about, she's fucking great with Cas.... Glow bowling, fuck yeah. What an awesome idea. How did I not know about this place.....?? We're gonna have to take the magic slushies there..."

"WOW!!!" He says "FAAANCCY." As Casi comes back down the stairs in a pair of cat-eye sunglasses with crystals. Luna's behind her.

"Aren't they COOL!! I'm ready to go now!!" Casi says happily heading towards the door.

Colson and Luna erupt into laughter as they follow behind her, out of the house. "WE OUT!!" He shouts as Luna closes the door.

"You're doing great!" He whispers to her, grabbing a plump ass cheek as they walk to his Rover. He loves her ass. She looks at him beaming, heart soaring.

--------------------------------------------------

Walking into the bowling alley is like entering a different world for Casi. "WHOOOOAH...." She says taking it all in. She turns to say something to Luna but sees her shirt through her jacket. "YOUR SHIRT IS GLOWING!!!" She shrieks.

Luna and Colson look over at each other laughing. Casi's enthusiasm is contagious. "It's the magic light, remember? We'll have to see if we can get one of the special balls for you." Luna tells her. She can't stop smiling.

"Yeeeeeah!!!" Says Casi as Luna leads them to the counter.

"Luna!??!!" The guy behind it says in amazement.

She tilts her head for a second, then she recognizes him. "Holy Cow!! Roger?" She embraces the young man warmly as he comes around the counter to hug her. "This is Colson and Casi." She says introducing them. Colson shakes his hand, Casi waves. "Roger's dad owns the place, we used to hang out when we were younger." She explains. Turning she asks "How is he? And your mom?"

"She fucking knows EVERYBODY." Colson muses to himself watching her.

"They're great!!" He says walking back around the counter. "Retired, sailing wherever they want."

"That's really good to hear. I always liked them." She says leaning over the counter, reminiscing. "Man. We had SO much fun here when we were kids." She smiles. "Do you know Roger, that this is indeed Casi's first time glow blowing?" She turns around to lean her back on the counter and smile at Casi.

"You don't say, Loons?" Roger continues "You know what that means....."

"Mmmmhmmm..." Says Luna with a knowing smile. Casi's is bursting at the seams. Colson smiles watching his girls interact.

"Here we go. The specialty...." Says Roger rolling out a rack filled with brightly glowing white bowling balls. Casie squeals. The adults laugh at her reaction. She picks her ball as Luna and Colson thank Roger and pay for their shoes and lane. Walking behind a giddy Casi towards their lane, Colson grabs one of Luna's ass cheeks firmly and kisses her on the top of the head making her body flush with heat.

"Damn, I love him." She thinks happily.

They bowl 2 games, then grab a pizza. Luna and Casie are sitting next to each other on the floor eating with their legs stretched out. "Everything looks so cool!! Casie says still looking all around. "Even our shoes!!"

"Want me to take a picture of 'em?" Luna asks her.

"Will you?" Casi asks munching on her pizza.

"Sure, I'm gonna take 2 though." She says as she pulls out her phone and camera.

"Why?" Asks Casi as Luna shoots.

"So I can send the digital copy from my phone to your dad's, so you can have it. And one with my camera that I'll develop later, to keep forever."

"Develop?" Asks Casi.

Trying to think how to explain it, Luna says "Yooouu know how you would print a picture off of a computer?" Casie nods. "It's the way people used to print pictures before computers."

"Oh. Why don't you want yours printed off of a computer?" She asks after understanding the concept.

"That's a very good question." Luna tells her, impressed. "Printing a picture is really quick and easy. Developing a picture takes time and care."

"So, developing is better?"

"I think so."

"Will you teach me?" The little girl looks up at Luna as she asks.

"Absolutely." Luna tells her with a smile.

Colson is sitting next to Casi in a chair, eating too. His heart melts listening to his girls talk. "Luna's so fucking sweet with her.... Case really seems to like her. I knew she would. God, I fucking love them." He thinks while finishing his pizza.

--------------------------------------------------

They bowl another 2 games before leaving, stop for ice cream then drop Luna off.

Pulling away, Casi erupts. "DAD!!! SHE IS THE COOOOOLEST!!! She has the coolest name. The coolest stuff. DADDY! SHE GAVE ME THE COOLEST GLASSES EVER!!! SHE'S SO COOL!!!"

Colson is beaming, looking at her through the rear view mirror. "So, you like her, Peanut?" He asks laughing.

"I LOVE HER!! Casi shouts. Then her tone softens "You did a really good job, Dad." She tells Colson.

"With what, Kiddo?" Glancing in the rear view again.

"Waiting for a good girlfriend. Did you know that she...." Casie's words go straight to Colson's happy heart as she continues to talk about Luna as he drives them home.

**********************************************

"That was so fun!!" Luna thinks heading inside "I didn't know kids were fucking cool.... I really hope she wants me to teach her how to develop. THAT'D fucking cool." She smiles to her self while closing the door.

--------------------------------------------------

🎶A Machine//His Scene Queen//Tattoo skins//Covered in leather//When I dream//It's of us two//🎶

Luna's smoking a joint, working on lyrics when Colson FaceTimes her. "Hey Kitten, Case is asleep, so me and the guys are gonna go out for a bite and a drink. You hungry? He asks.

"I could eat. Where we going?"

"The Palm."

"Gimme a few to change?"

"Sure. Text me when you want me to head over."

"Ok. I won't be long. Love you."

"Love you too." He kisses the screen loudly making Luna laugh as they hang up.

--------------------------------------------------

To be continued..... Because after the kid's finally tucked away, it's time for the Assholes to come out and play. 😈👊😈

[mysydneymemories-blog]

Why Boomers can't talk about the 'R' word

One reason is a bloke who lives nearby. I don't know him well we've never got much past banal chats about the weather or footy but he hasn't had a job for a few years. I suspect he might have been "let go". Or simply retired. He appears a bit lost, like a man chasing things to do. His bins go out earlier than before. Takes his time over domestic chores. He grew a beard, too, which was a mistake. It's all grey. Makes him look much older than he is. Like a slimmed-down Hemingway. Seeing him, I've opted to keep shaving. Then there's the man I'll call Gary, with whom I worked over several decades. I left; he stayed. I caught up with him a while back. He said he felt under pressure at work and was taking medication for stress. The job was killing him. He had to get out. He did, months later. Then I saw him again at the funeral of another former colleague. He'd put on weight. His face looked puffy. Asked about life since escaping the office grind, Gary replied: 'I don't know what to do now. Wonder if I made a hideous mistake.' Asked about life since escaping the office grind, Gary replied: "I don't know what to do now. Struggle to find reasons to get up. Wonder if I made a hideous mistake." This felt like another warning. Was this what happens when you move from full-time work to no work at all, or bits and pieces of stuff you call work? Is this what retirement looks like? A financial guy had already talked me into a transition-to-retirement scheme. I'd focused on the transition, not the r-word. Skimmed over the bit where a payment was called a pension. But the fact was I'd gradually moved transitioned from a Monday-to-Friday job to a four-days-a-week-job, then to several smaller jobs, not all of which involved earning money. During the four-day phase, Wednesdays were mine. For dog walks. Swims. Shopping. Cooking. Stuff. I loved Wednesday. It was a peaceful island in the midst of a fast-running river I had to cross every week. A place to take stock and not answer calls. But maybe Wednesdays were special because of what came before and after. If I had a week of Wednesdays, things would seem different. I could end up with a bad case of the Garys. Perhaps I'm being unfair to him. It's possible he was just having a bad day at the funeral, which was a shocker. Too long, too many speeches, and a prevailing sense that we were there for a popular man who'd had a heart attack while riding his bike with mates. He was 51. Much younger than me. And still 14 years off what used to be set in stone as retirement age. That's how it was: you hit 65, retired, went off and played golf or got a caravan. Or a Winnebago, like Jack Nicholson's character in the 2002 movie About Schmidt, which explores what happens to Warren Schmidt after he retires from an insurance company. Early scenes show Schmidt counting down the last hour of employment and enduring awkward speeches at his office farewell. Then he's hit by a double-whammy: the sudden loss of his wife and a lack of purpose. He takes off, alone, in the Winnebago, in what becomes a kind of oldies' road movie. It makes poignant viewing now. Nicholson's last film came out in 2010. Since then, rumours have swirled about his health. In 2013, he told Vanity Fair he didn't consider himself retired, just less driven. Appropriately, About Schmidt came out the year Nicholson turned 65 the age still linked with the r-word. It's actually an outdated historical construct.

Appropriately, the film "About Schmidt" came out the year its star, Jack Nicholson, turned 65 the age still linked with the r-word.Credit:Alamy In Australia, a government-funded retirement pension dates back to 1909, when it was paid to men from the age of 65. For women, the magic age was 60, from 1910. These pensions, to support ageing victims of tough times from the 1890s, included income and residency tests. They didn't represent a crushing burden for the government, as just 4 per cent of the population was over 65. Life expectancy was about 55 for men, 59 for women. Today, by contrast, about 15 per cent of Australians are over 65 and life expectancy has leapt to about 80 for men and 85 for women. For any budget-conscious government, that represents plenty of potentially costly retirees. And they can be a cranky lot. Hence Prime Minister Scott Morrison's backdown late last year on the Abbott-era plan, from 2014, to increase the pension age from 67 to 70, starting in 2025. Steady increases in age eligibility would have seen it hit 70 by 2035. This was portrayed as a move by penny-pinching politicians to force honest folk to scrap retirement plans and work until they dropped. Doing his man-of-the-people impression, Deputy PM Michael McCormack told Sky News: "If you're a tradie or a brickie or a shearer in rural and regional Australia, you don't want some suit in Canberra telling you you've got to work until you're 70." Absolutely not. Labor didn't protest about this as much as might have been expected, because it was under then prime minister Kevin Rudd in 2009 that the pension age was lifted from 65 to 67 (from 2017). Rudd's treasurer, Wayne Swan, acknowledged the move would never be popular, but justified it by saying Australia faced a "demographic time bomb". An estimated 22 per cent of the population will be over 65 by 2057. The Council on the Ageing (COTA) says 7.9 million Australians, almost a third of the population, are currently aged 50 or above. Of these, 29 per cent of those still working think they'll never retire. Not surprisingly, it also found that "the expected age of retirement increases as household income level decreases". The importance of financial security becomes clear when I type the words "Retirement in Australia" in the online catalogue for the local library. The first entries include books about the future of property investing and keeping your self-managed superannuation fund simple. These books, not to mention Enjoying Retirement, The Retirement Living Handbook and Women and Retirement ("Challenges of a new life phase") are also popular. Most are already out on loan, with at least one reserve in place. Which is understandable. It makes financial sense to borrow a book instead of buying it. And libraries are popular with older people. Then again, how old is old?

Hillary Clinton was 69 when she ran for the US presidency in 2016.Credit:AAP Turning 50 is the first tipping point, a convenient age for headhunters making shortlists shorter, or managers trimming staff numbers. It's when you're over 50 that you start to receive brochures about investments, superannuation choices and that once-faraway place called retirement. Not 60, when you may find yourself eligible for a Seniors Card (a tad embarrassing, but fabulous for cut-price public transport). Or 67 (thanks, Mr Swan), when perhaps you'll put your hand up for a pension. It's 50. Ridiculous. Ken Rosewall was still winning matches in tennis tournaments in the early 1980s, just a few years shy of 50. And the three main contenders in the 2016 US presidential election Donald Trump, Hillary Clinton and Bernie Sanders were aged 70, 69 and 75 respectively. None are considered retirees.

Donald Trump was the oldest person to assume the office of US president, being 70 years, 220 days at his inauguration.Credit:AAP The retirement age, incidentally, varies considerably around the world. In Japan, which has the world's highest average life expectancy (just under 84), incentives may be offered to people to postpone a state pension until 70. In Brazil, the average retirement age is 56 for men, 53 for women. Brazil has generous pensions and a debt crisis. In France, the retirement age has been moved from 60 to 62; in Germany, it's 65 and seven months.

Royal Commissioner Kenneth Hayne. Just as the pension age is less fixed than it used to be, so is the concept of retirement. The titular character in About Schmidt struggles to adapt. All those years behind an actuary's desk were not fun, but what now? And why is it that some capable people still face compulsory retirement? Kenneth Hayne, who turns 74 in June, demonstrated impressive vigour and acuity heading the recent banking royal commission. He was able to take that on because he was deemed too old to continue sitting as a Justice of the High Court. Hayne had to retire from that job in 2015. Since a constitutional amendment in 1977, members of the Australian federal judiciary must retire at 70. The last judge not affected by this provision, having been appointed in 1976, was Justice Graham Bell. He retired from the Family Court of Australia in early 2015, aged 78, and took a swing at the new law on the way out: "These days, 70 is equal to 60 or 55 Judges should be able to go on till 80 provided they pass a medical inspection They are sent out to pasture too early."

Ruth Bader Ginsburg serves as a Justice of the US Supreme Court at age 86.Credit:AAP Three of the nine serving Justices of the US Supreme Court, including the legendary Ruth Bader Ginsburg, 86, would be gone if the US had a similar law. Here, it means that Geoffrey Nettle, who became a High Court judge in 2015 at the age of 64 (the oldest-ever appointee), will hit the mandatory retirement age in late 2020. He will serve a maximum term of just under six years, which seems a waste of a fine legal mind. It's possible we've been looking at all this the wrong way around. Instead of designating a retirement age, perhaps the question should be: how young can you get away with it? The devotees of a mantra called FIRE Financial Independence, Retire Early are reshaping ideas of what early retirement looks like. Forget your 60s; their goal is to bail out in half that time, or, in the case of J.P. Livingston, in your 20s. Instead of designating a retirement age, perhaps the question should be: how young can you get away with it? "I retired in New York City with just over $2.25 million when I was 28," she says on her website, The Money Habit. "I wholeheartedly believe that anyone can retire decades earlier than their peers." The secret, she says, lies in financial planning. (Luck and a solid financial base also help.) The FIRE movement started in the US but has since spread globally through myriad blogs and websites. A father figure is Jacob Lund Fisker, a Danish former nuclear astrophysicist, whose Early Retirement Extreme blog began in 2007. Fisker summarises his philosophy as "a combination of simple living, anti-consumerism, DIY ethics, self-reliance, resilience, and applied capitalism". The baton has now been passed to Peter Adeney, a Canadian. Writing as Mr Money Mustache, Adeney's ideas about very early retirement, which he achieved in 2005, age 30, gained so much traction that The New Yorker magazine profiled him in 2016. "Retirement, in his hands, is a slippery term," Nick Paumgarten wrote. "It doesn't mean playing golf or sitting on the porch. It is merely the freedom to do what he wants when he wants He disdains the idea of spending another minute of his life in a cubicle in order to afford a dryer or a Tesla." The profile described Adeney using a woodworking vice to squeeze limes. His wife, Simi, was quoted as saying: "I've gotten used to it all, but he's a weird dude." Maybe too weird. Last year, a Guardian article about the FIRE movement noted Adeney's influence but reported: "He and his wife divorced recently." Apostles of FIRE have firm ideas about what life should look like and it doesn't include employers. (Children are seldom mentioned, either.) Many have come from the financial or technology sectors and are resting on a solid base. It takes money to make money, or even save money. And as appealing as the idea of ditching a boss in your 30s may be, the question, even more daunting than for someone in their 60s, is the same: what's next? As nice as the idea of ending work in your 30s may be, the question, even more daunting than for 60somethings, is the same: what's next? For J.P. Livingston, "a successful and happy retirement is about changing chapters rather than one static image of constant adrenaline and adventure". But Fisker could be running out of steam. In February, he diverted blog visitors to Bertrand Russell's 1932 essay In Praise of Idleness. Russell is an unlikely poster boy for early retirement. He died aged 97 and was still writing into his final years. Anne Moore would love to follow suit. A social scientist and entrepreneur, she tells me from her Sydney office how she started a software business "at 57, mid-career". Later, she founded PlanDo, which offers career coaching and advocates embracing the idea that careers are no longer linear starting with a junior role and ending at 65 with farewell handshakes. She talks of the much-hyped "gig economy". "People don't retire any more," she argues. "They are working into their 70s." Or longer. Like many women, Moore juggled different sorts of work with raising a family. She thinks the random, disjointed careers familiar to women may become the norm for everyone. Retirement, she insists, "was never, ever on my horizon. I come from a working-class background and always had a strong work ethic. Just as the idea of being a young stay-at-home mum was never attractive, it never occurred to me that I would retire." Work, she says, can inform a sense of identity; can even be noble. The quest is to find work paid or otherwise that is purposeful and fulfilling. And it means thinking about work in different ways.

ABC newsreader Ian Henderson was happy to retire at 65.Credit:ABC Despite the rigidity applied to judges, ideas about retirement are, as Moore suggests, becoming more fluid. And I'm not the only one who resists the r-word. ABC Radio's Jon Faine recently announced that this year would be his last behind the microphone in Melbourne. He told a caller who rang to lament his pending departure, "I'm not retiring. I'm just going to be doing other things." Faine, now 62, says of his decision to move on: "Inside my head it is very important. I hope to still stay engaged, useful and busy, but not in an all-consuming job like this." I've heard many people ranging from cricketer Mitchell Johnson to former Victorian premier Jeff Kennett express variations of the same sentiment: once you start talking or thinking about retirement, you've already gone. We all thought Malcolm Turnbull was gone when he was deposed as prime minister last August. He even suggested he might go quietly. Then he went to New York. When he returned in October, he declared: "I'm not engaged in politics any longer. I'm retired." Hmmm, maybe At least Turnbull didn't shy away from the r-word. Another who didn't was Faine's former colleague Ian Henderson. Late last year, at the traditional age of 65, the Victorian TV newsreader declared that after 38 years at the ABC, it was time to embark upon "a long-hatched retirement plan". A key component was "a bush block; a couple of acres to play with". He calls me from there to discuss his new life. He'd talked of retirement, he says, because it was something people could grasp onto and understand. "I was informed partly by memories of my own father, who retired at 65," says Henderson. "He was a commercial traveller, a Depression boy; got one job and stuck with it. By the time he got to retiring, he was very much over work. I think he saw ahead a golden age that was perhaps not quite realised ... His idea of renewal was to build a dream home, something he did twice. He withdrew from the community, became quite isolated. To me, that was something of a cautionary tale." I was conscious that I needed a few things to fill the void; occupy myself. But it's also good to survey the horizon, see what's out there. At the bush block, Henderson says, "there's no shortage of projects; [my wife] Susie and I are consumed by them." So too, their adult children. There's a tiered organic vegie garden. And he's taken up baking bread. "I was conscious that I needed a few things to fill the void; occupy myself. But it's also a good idea to survey the horizon and see what's out there." Since he left the newsroom he's been spotted back at the ABC, doing some work for Catalyst. So has he un-retired? No. "When I stopped, I did not rule out dabbling in other projects. But I was not looking at a second career. My criteria for new things are that they are interesting, worthwhile and fun." The Catalyst project, which involved chatting to centenarians with a strong sense of purpose, ticks all those boxes. I'd thought he might fit the old stereotype of retirement: out at 65 to play golf. Hendo loves his golf. A knee problem, however, has restricted his time on the course since he stopped reading the news. Still, he declares himself "soooo busy there often aren't enough hours in the day". Later, he sends a photo of his tomato plants. With a caption: "My Babies". Some women like Sally, whom I've known for more than 40 years choose to reshape their lives. She did this once before, moving from the corporate world to a career teaching English as a second language at a high school. She stopped doing that around the time she turned 60. "If pressed, I would say that I'm retired in one sense of the word. But I'd rather say I'm just living in a different way. I've not withdrawn but restarted." I'm retired in one sense of the word. But I'd rather say I'm just living in a different way. I've not withdrawn but restarted. She expands on the theme: "I still derive an income, but not through recognisable activity what some call work. My income tax statement looks different. I still have goals and monitor my own performance. I am making different types of connections with people whom I wouldn't call colleagues or friends, but who share similar interests. I describe myself as 'occupied' rather than busy, because busy is a state I was constantly in as a teacher for 13 years. "I occupy myself now with activities which are of my choosing, including new activities for fun and out of curiosity. I have time now although I haven't fully capitalised on it yet for listening to more classical music, reading more widely and broadening my exposure to culture." She's working on a family-history writing project. She's tried ballet. ("It's meant to be an absolute beginners' class, but no way are they all beginners. Especially that 11-year-old with her hair in a bun, a pink tutu and pointe shoes!") And she's considering a beginners' hip-hop class. "I am having fun and have absolutely no regrets." American futurist Glen Hiemstra addresses the "what next?" question in this way: "The first quarter of the 21st century will see a great reinvention of the third phase of life, away from classic retirement and towards something like 'life fulfilment'. The end of retirement and beginning of life fulfilment may be a kind of liberation." Or, as an ad puts it: Shouldn't your retirement be the start of something new? Sure. But what, exactly? There are all kinds of possibilities and no simple solutions. In search of answers, or perhaps just some interesting questions, I enrolled in philosophy classes early in my not-retired life. I ended up doing two terms, which seemed like enough when Rudyard Kipling's poem If was wheeled out for inspiration. The classes taught me the value of pausing; of taking time out, even for just a few minutes, to dwell on the moment. And I liked the notion that anxiety can simply mean thinking about the future. Wondering, and often worrying, about what may lie ahead. I never told the Tuesday-night tennis guys that, for much of one year, my Wednesday nights yes, Wednesday, once my special day were occupied pondering topics like The Power of Beauty. I have lunch with Michael the lawyer in the city, not far from his office. He can't recall me losing my cool over his repeated jabs about "retirement". That's not surprising: it was some time ago. It also confirms that the incident meant more to me than him. He agrees the concept of retirement has changed dramatically since we both started working in the 1970s. It's something he's pondered, too. A few years ago, he was politely nudged out the door of the big law firm where he'd been a partner. Experience can matter less than billable hours. He faced an unsettling period that left him convinced he wasn't ready to walk away. So he sucked it up and moved on. Talked to people. Got offers from smaller, more flexible law firms. He's doing fine. When he insists on buying lunch, I protest, politely, then wonder if he reckons I can't be earning much in my new life. Stop it, I tell myself, you're being too sensitive again. Later, I send a thank-you message and can't resist two last questions. Can he imagine retiring? And what would that look like? "No," he replies. "I think 'retire' will likely exit my and others' lexicon. We will all just gradually wind down work, tennis, our social lives and everything else, until we fade away." I tell him I hope this will be no time soon. "Fading away" is another type of transition; something more unsettling than what we've known. Perhaps we can keep talking about this at tennis again next Tuesday night. To read more from Good Weekend magazine, visit our page at The Sydney Morning Herald, The Age and Brisbane Times. Most Viewed in Money Loading https://www.smh.com.au/money/super-and-retirement/welcome-to-the-minefield-that-is-21st-century-retirement-20190409-p51c98.html?ref=rss&utm_medium=rss&utm_source=rss_feed