#what can i say. angbang.

[daily-smol-silm]

If you still take request, good old Angbang?

Day #116 - Dark lords on a dark throne

Well I certainly can't say no to angbang, can I?

[winds-of-zephyr416]

New favorite Sauron headcanon: No matter what form he takes, he always bears visible scarring around his neck from where Huan bit him.

[mai-komagata]

when fandom doesn't resonate

So like, i know a lot of people are Rings of Power fans and don't know anything about book canon. That is fine, we accept all folks, and its awesome to see perspectives of new fans. But like, I loved haladriel in season 1, and I realized in season 2 the majority of the fans saw the ship COMPLETELY differently than I did. Like they were expecting more from the dynamic than we got. And I see them all being disappointed in how it turned out when this is like the best it was ever gonna be and exceeded what I expected. Galadriel isn't getting with a devil who lied and manipulated her. The most they will have is a metaphorical stabbing scene.

Like is this just not understanding who Sauron is, or projecting a different romance trope I'm unaware of onto this ship? Like i love a lot of dark enemy relationship tropes but this was never gonna be enemies to lovers. Because its *Sauron*. Like even if you never read the books he is an evil eye that is the representation of the devil in the movies. Surely that amount of cultural knowledge permeated popular culture?

Sauron ships are about how close you can get to evil without being corrupted. (well, except for angbang, that is the opposite of that) The sexiness is the evil and the violence, the gaslighting, the delusion and the what might be but won't be. It's the promise of getting everything you could ever want and getting absolutely none of it. That is the promise of the Ring and ultimately of Sauron, because that is who he is. To me, Haladriel is attractive because it is a tangible look into what it is to be tempted by the ring. Because the vague "you can conquer middle earth" "you can save your friends" "you can become king" don't mean anything. But I can relate to being mansplained and passed over despite my merit, and have someone be a perfect coworker/mentor/partner that will help you achieve everything you want. Someone that is a shortcut for that respect. Someone who lets you say *i told you so* to everyone. Someone who lets you get revenge and be bad without *being bad*. That is sexy but it's a lie.

But that part is also sexy. The being picked by someone supremely evil and powerful, of being special. And if you are masochistic, the pain and the powerplay is also sexy. The metaphors of fighting and penetration and whatnot, that is interesting. Not to mention the sheer hubris he displays, and self-delusion. But like, I knew Halbrand was Sauron like from the second scene we saw him. It was like "oh yep, that is what is going on". There was never any illusion to me that Galadriel can make him good. Or that he'd want to fix himself for her . He can definitely *see himself* in her or or *see things he wants of her*, and that is a thrill, but he is never gonna want that sweet life he is promising to her. That is so transparently a lie but it is amusing to see him have the absolute NERVE to be that shameless. Dunno, do dark ships need to be "enemies to *lovers*" or have promise of redemption to be attractive? Sometimes it's just dark sexy manipulation and violence. Also, Galadriel is still *good*. She is tempted because temptation is a theme of Tolkien. But the whole point is she resisted the darkness. She isn't gonna overpower Sauron's either, and keep him on a leash. That is literally what Morgoth did. (Sauron would be into that, though, but he'd be a brat about it). Anyway. Is it just because I knew who Sauron was all along? If you want a ship where you get to keep Sauron as a pet, maybe Angbang is for you? Maybe that is why I'm so glad for silvergifting in Season 2, we all seemed to be in the same page as to what is going on. This was gonna be so tragic and kinky we were all here for it. I just seem to keep getting burned by straight ship fandoms having a wildly different vibe than I expect from them.

[verecunda]

I personally see that "torture" conversation again as gaslighting from Annatars side, to be honest. Because (I double checked again to make sure i am not mistaken) "Never in Tolkien's lore does Morgoth torture Sauron. Some moments could imply such an act, such as in The Silmarillion where it is mentioned that Morgoth would have, if victorious, destroyed even the beings that followed him" - So to me it has that even ... Crueler twist of Annatar just trying to gaslight Celebrimbor again. Maybe that is just me though! And maybe in the series Morgoth really did unimaginable to Mairon. WHO KNOWS

Hi, Anon! This got long-winded, so bear with me here. XD

That is certainly a viable reading of the scene, and I definitely think we should never take Sauron at his word because, well, he’s Sauron. But honestly, I think it’s much more interesting, much more horrifying, if he is being honest here.

First, to get the lore stuff out of the way: agreed, nowhere in the books are we told Morgoth ever tortured him. But at the same time, we’re never told he didn’t. Sauron was obviously his most valuable and trusted servant, but he still was that - a servant, an underling, subject to his master’s caprices. And we don’t have any scenes of them interacting directly that allow us to gauge their relationship; we just have a handful of references that can be extrapolated in multiple ways. (For full disclosure: I’m an enthusiastic Angbang shipper, and I tend to view their relationship as more or less positive, one of the only good things they have going for them, but I try to keep an open mind on what canon does/doesn’t tell me.)

Most notably, take the scene where Sauron is defeated by Lúthien and Huan. She tells him she’ll send his spirit back to Angband : “There everlastingly thy naked self shall endure the torment of his scorn, pierced by his eyes.” Whereupon Sauron flees, and we hear nothing more of him till after the War of Wrath. We don’t know anything that he does in the meantime; we don’t even know if he returns to Morgoth’s service (the Lay of Leithian does suggest it, but the published Silmarillion gives us nothing either way). Whether or not Morgoth would actually punish him for his failure is probably beside the point: the point is that Sauron clearly believes punishment is a likely outcome. There are other ways you could parse this bit (and I do have Feelings about it!!) but the most obvious reading is that it’s terror of his master’s likely response that sends Sauron into hiding. So overall, it’s an ambiguous scenario, but there is certainly room to interpret a darker take on their relationship, and even allowing for deliberate ambiguity, it does seem to me that the show creators have chosen to explore that darker take.

To return to this particular scene, I don’t think he’s trying to deceive Celebrimbor any more - now that his true identity is revealed, outright deception is no longer going to work, because why would Celebrimbor believe anything else he says? Better to reel him back in with the truth. In that scene, I think Sauron is actually trying to make him understand his grand vision for the “healing” of Middle-earth. We already know he believes that's what he's doing. I don’t think he views Celebrimbor as an equal, no way, but I think he does consider that Celebrimbor’s ambitions chime with his own.

But crucially, his failure here is that in baring his soul and talking about the genuine suffering he’s gone through, he inadvertently reveals just how warped and ultimately irredeemable his own mindset has become. We actually saw this first with Galadriel at the end of s1: Sauron reveals his relief at Morgoth’s defeat, his feeling that a “great, clenched fist” had been released from about his neck - yet just a couple of minutes after that, he repels her because he admits that he sees saving Middle-earth and ruling it as the same thing.

It’s the same in the tower scene. Revealing his torture by Morgoth does engage Celebrimbor’s sympathy, but he loses it almost at once when he starts talking about his pain being a triumph of his own willpower, then especially when he breaks out all the textbook abuser lines about how Celebrimbor has “forced” him to hurt and deceive him. I don't think he would have said all that if he was just lying. All that self-justification strikes me as the response of someone who has suffered, but has never found a healthy way to process any of it, and who has ultimately gone on to continue the cycle of abuse. And when Celebrimbor demolishes all these self-justifications - “You can deceive even yourself” - I think Sauron's expression there speaks volumes. That’s the look of a Maia who has just been hit where it hurts, because rather than being taken in, Celebrimbor has just confronted him with exactly how damaged and fucked up he really is.

[ann-atar]

A few more observations from ep. 7:

!!!spoilers!!!

Angbang folks we're living well. I'll be chanting for a flashback to the days of "pain became a game" at some point next season.

Celebrimbor's horror when he realized the "mithril ore" was Sauron's pitch black blood. "What is this?" What is this stuff, Annatar, that's all over every surface, on my hands, and in my hair? I put mithril ore in my coffee this morning, did I drink your blood? (This is great insight into the wraith phenomena and the rings' effects on Men but fuuuccck.)

The pattern, the cycle. Sauron's illusion can only mimic life, and he's trapped in the cycle of abuser and abused. Does he get it? He's choking on it but doesn't quite understand what's caught in his throat, so to speak.

Mirdania's horrifying, tragic end. Another thing I didn't see coming! I love it when shows surprise me. Once disembodied she'll be back in Mandos' Halls, and she'll eventually be reunited with Celebrimbor in Aman.

Gil-galad looks fabulous in armor. Now he needs a floppy asymmetrical haircut like Elrond's. Benjamin Walker is such a good-looking man, let's style him up! (Yes I'm shallow.)

Galadriel is drawing strength from three people in this ep: Elrond, Celebrimbor(!!!), and Adar. She's beginning to see Adar as a reflection of what could be if she ever gives in to what I'm calling the Sauron-effect: Adar is ruined and corrupted, so obsessed it might kill him and enslave the Uruk again; Celebrimbor is the other side to that, someone who broke free but is still broken, he turned back toward the light and now he has turned around to face the consequences.

Or maybe four people: that scene with Arondir got me good.

I wrote this post about Adar and the possible implications of using Nenya yesterday, @baddybaddyadardaddy wrote this amazing post about the idea that final confrontation this season might be a three-person fight, and when I watched the ep again the way they frame Adar as being caught between darkness and light was so apparent. Crossing my fingers for this because damn, that would be some fine storytelling.

Poor Durin. And Elrond waiting for him on the battlefield was just so awful. I really hope Durin can resist the call of the rings but this confrontation with this father will make him emotionally vulnerable. BUT if he is tempted to put on his father's ring I firmly believe that Disa will chop off his hand. They better not do ANYTHING to Disa; I'm really enjoying Rings but if they use Disa's life to make Durin susceptible to Sauron's influence I might drop it like a hot rock, just saying.

[mistergandalf]

ULTIMATE TOLKIEN BLORBO MASTERPOST

Who is THE blorbo of the Tolkien fandom here on tumblr dot com? Let's find out!

What are the criteria for voting?

What is a blorbo to you? As Aragorn would say: What does your heart tell you? Therein lies your answer. For me, it's who I'd like the whump the most. Maybe for you it's who is the most shippable. Maybe it's the one that means the most to you for what they represent. Maybe it's your poor little meow meow (looking at you, Angbang lovers). Let your feelings guide you.

Is this only supposed to be about the books, or is it based on any Tolkien-based media?

This is about blorbos. Wherever you found your blorbo, that's fine. If you want to be a book purist about it, you're valid. If you love Thorin Oakenshield simply because Richard Armitage is hot, you are also valid.

***PLEASE ALSO NOTE that my blog is a Rings of Power positive blog! If you don’t like it that’s fine, but if you post negative comments or reblogs on my posts, I will block you! I don’t want negativity in my activity feed, thank you!***

When will polls be posted?

Polls will be posted daily at 12pm EDT (GMT -4), staggered by 5-10 minutes on each poll. There will be a day between final votes as the data will be needed for the next poll!

Schedule is as follows: (Updated because I’m dumb and didn’t realize how many rounds the second chance bracket has)

4/23 - Round One 4/25 - Round Two (Primary Bracket) 4/26 - Round Two (Second Chance Bracket) 4/27 - Round Three (Primary Bracket) 4/28 - Round Three (Second Chance Bracket) 4/30 - Round Four (Second Chance Bracket) 5/2 - Round Five (Second Chance Bracket) 5/4 - Round Six (Second Chance Bracket) 5/5 - Round Four (Primary Bracket) 5/7 - Round Seven (Second Chance Bracket) 5/9 - Round Eight (Second Chance Bracket) 5/10 - Round Five (Primary Bracket) - decides the finalist 5/12 - Round Nine (Second Chance Bracket) - decides the finalist 5/14 - FINAL ROUND - THE ULTIMATE TOLKIEN BLORBO

Check the tag #ultimate tolkien blorbo to see new posts! Feel free to share your thoughts in the tag as well!

I have more questions!

Okay, click the readmore then!

Hey! Why did you pair this character with that character?

Because I spent a whole evening googling how tournament brackets work (I am not a sports person) and then I did a lot of math and sorting.

Okay, but I really want to know!

WELL first I thought: "How can I quantify and rank blorbos?" The answer: AO3. I went into the Tolkien fandom general tag and ranked the first 32 characters by the number of fanfics in which they appear.*

Then I split them by story. I roughly kept Hobbit characters with Hobbit characters, LotR with LotR, and Silmarillion with Silmarillion to keep it as fair as possible and give all corners of the fandom a chance to see their blorbo win. Some characters are in multiple sources, like Elrond or Gandalf, so I tried to keep those characters with someone who is probably just as well-known.**

Then I followed the rules the internet told me about how tournaments work. The highest-ranked character goes with the lowest-ranked character, the second-highest with the second-lowest, etc.

And that's how I did it! It was a fantastic way to waste an afternoon.

*I may have eliminated and/or played with a couple options. Some of these characters had fewer fics than the character "OC," which makes sense. I took off Erestor because literally only Glorfindel stans would choose him, and Glorfindel is on here. I also lumped together Elladan and Elrohir because if you can tell them apart, it's because they're both your blorbos. Tolkien did NOT give them distinct personalities. Also if I didn’t lump them together, I wouldn’t be able to fit Celebrimbor, and that would be a shame.

**Characters who appear in multiple stories had their rankings weighted to account for that fact. I got a C in statistics in college, though, so I frankly have no idea if the way I weighted them is correct, nor do I care, because I'm satisfied with how the rankings turned out.

I don’t like how you did this!

Okay, don’t vote then. Nobody’s making you.

FORTH EORLINGAS! Have fun voting! As Gimli would say... May the best Dwarf win! ;)

Round One [results & analysis]

Thorin vs. Bard | Bilbo vs. Dwalin | Kili vs. Gandalf | Fili vs. Thranduil | Legolas vs. Eomer | Aragorn vs. Eowyn | Elrond vs. Elladan & Elrohir | Frodo vs. Merry | Gimli vs. Pippin | Samwise vs. Boromir | Faramir vs. Galadriel | Maedhros vs. Celebrimbor | Maedhros vs. Celebrimbor (RoP free version bc some of you are whiny babies) | Maglor vs. Finrod | Glorfindel vs. Morgoth | Sauron vs. Celegorm | Fingon vs. Feanor

Round Two [results & analysis]

Thorin vs. Bilbo | Legolas vs. Thranduil | Pippin vs. Éowyn | Maglor vs. Frodo | Gandalf vs. Samwise | Elrond vs. Maedhros | Faramir vs. Glorfindel | Sauron vs. Fëanor

Round Two (Second Chance Bracket) [results & analysis]

Aragorn vs. Elladan & Elrohir | Gimli vs. Morgoth | Merry vs. Bard | Finrod vs. Celegorm | Boromir vs. Kíli | Fíli vs. Celebrimbor | Éomer vs. Galadriel | Fingon vs. Arwen

Round Three [results & analysis]

Bilbo vs. Legolas |  Éowyn vs. Frodo | Samwise vs. Elrond | Faramir vs. Fëanor

Round Three (Second Chance Bracket) [results & analysis]

Aragorn vs. Gandalf | Gimli vs. Maedhros | Merry vs. Glorfindel | Finrod vs. Sauron | Boromir vs. Thorin | Celebrimbor vs. Thranduil | Éomer vs. Pippin | Arwen vs. Maglor

Round Four (Second Chance Bracket) [results & analysis]

Aragorn vs. Gimli | Merry vs. Finrod | Boromir vs. Celebrimbor | Pippin vs. Arwen

Round Five (Second Chance Bracket) [results & analysis]

Aragorn vs. Bilbo | Éowyn vs. Merry | Boromir vs. Elrond | Pippin vs. Fëanor

Round Six (Second Chance Bracket) [results & analysis]

Aragorn vs. Éowyn | Boromir vs. Pippin

Round Four [results & analysis]

Legolas vs. Frodo | Samwise vs. Faramir

Round Seven (Second Chance Bracket) [results & analysis]

Éowyn vs. Faramir | Pippin vs. Legolas

Round Eight (Second Chance Bracket) [results & analysis]

Éowyn vs. Pippin

Round Five [results & analysis]

Frodo vs. Samwise

Round Nine (Second Chance Bracket) [results & analysis]

Éowyn vs. Frodo

FINAL ROUND

Samwise vs. Frodo

[dalliansss]

Can you do the angbang for this? “You dumbass. Don’t do that. Ever again.”

@finwecandoit

dialogue prompts for ~injury~

When Mairon comes upon Melkor in the laboratory and fiddling with dangerously bright chemicals, the maia just knows there will be some bodily hurt involved, sooner or later. He knows he has to be close by to prevent any hurt, if possible. So-- for now, Mairon delegates things to Langon, Gothmog and Thûringwethil, while he haunts the laboratory like a wraith, anxiously wringing his hands as Melkor takes to mixing the unstable chemicals together to concoct some new sinister thing.

It is past a week, and Mairon cannot yet breathe easy. Melkor has just bottled the mixture-- which had now turned into a white crystalline substance like salt.

"What will you use an explosive for?" Mairon asks, deciding to break the silence and approaching his spouse. The sooner Melkor unhands the bottle, the easier Mairon's breathing would be. Things are never good if Melkor is in the laboratory and starts mixing things. The last time he did, four Balrogs fused, and ten orcs too-- Mairon shuddered, remembering the horrendous clean-up he'd had to help the lesser úmaiar with. He wishes that Melkor would just quit it with chemicals.

He makes to grab the bottle, but Melkor moves it away from his reach.

"What are you doing?" Melkor asks, quirking an eyebrow at him.

"Give me the bottle, Mbelekhoruz," Mairon says, trying hard not to sound petulant. "You and bottled chemicals are never a good combination."

"What do you mean? I made this. I know what it is, and how to use it."

Mairon resists the urge to sigh and makes another grab for the bottle, but Melkor stands -- towering over him, and keeps holding the bottle beyond his reach.

"Away with you, laurina, I know what I'm doing."

"Well, then tell me what it is for," Mairon scowls up at him. The ends of his ginger hair ignites into flames.

"Why?"

"BECAUSE!"

Melkor gently brushes him aside again, and the big sometimes idiotic Vala shuffles the bottle between his gauntleted hands. Mairon feels his heartbeat stop with every clink of the bottle over the corners and edges of Melkor's gauntlets. Oh, Utumno, why did he have to use thin-glass bottles thin glass bottles are not a good idea stop shuffling it like that, damn--

True to Mairon's foresight, the bottled thing explodes -- a huge blast of fire right at Melkor's face. Mairon shrieks, and it is only his quick thinking that prevents the worst of the flames from touching his lord, his husband. When the smoke clears, Melkor stands there, stunned. He blinks dumbly at his now-empty hands, his face, neck, chest and arms blackened by soot.

"Er," says Melkor.

Mairon smacks him upside the head, the only being in creation who can do such a thing and actually survive.

“You dumbass! Don’t do that! Ever again!"

Melkor scowls, and endures being sat down as Mairon wipes him clean of soot. The maia is nagging at him again, a thousand words per minute.

Er...best to tune it out, then. Yes, yes. Alright, he will be more careful. Yes, yes, of course laurina, as you wish...

[cilil]

𝓐𝓝 ~ For my 6666th post, I decided to compile an Angbang appreciation post to (hopefully) spread some joy and positivity for one of my favorite ships of all time. I tried my best to present the things that I love about Angbang in a broad and open manner, so that it encompasses all sorts of takes and welcomes as many fellow Angbangers as possible.

As I will also say at the end of this: You're cordially invited and welcome to share what you love about this ship and/or add aspects I haven't mentioned in this post. Just keep it positive!

Melkor. Ah Melkor, the man himself, the myth, the legend, a prime example for chaotic evil and our resident devil. Throughout the Silmarillion, as well as Tolkien's other writings, Melkor is busy hating pretty much everyone... except Mairon, it seems. He trusts him enough to let him run entire fortresses and taught him a lot of dark magic, which, as mundane as it may seem, is a lot more productive and friendly than Melkor has been to other people, including those who serve him. I - and I think many other Angbang shippers as well - love the idea that there is this one person in the world whom he actually likes and appreciates.

Mairon. The eponymous Lord of the Rings and general nuisance, enough to make Eru himself intervene twice, the Deceiver, professional pretty boy and peerless perfectionist. No other Maia has come close to causing as much drama, and something tells me Melkor will be proud once he hears about the Second and Third Age shenanigans. Mairon seems to hate everyone as well... except Melkor, with whom you could argue he might be a little obsessed. He's both frightening and hilarious and, for better or for worse, an icon both in-universe and outside.

Great ship name. Angbang is both a handy and memorable ship name and an amazing pun. It sure is a funny coincidence that my (to date) favorite ship all time also has my (maybe forever) favorite ship name of all time. And if that wasn't enough: If you take Morgoth x Sauron as the basis, their ship name is Moron which... yeah. No explanation needed. The stars aligned with this one.

Opposites attract. There are fundamental differences between Melkor and Mairon as characters, such as the chaos vs. order dynamic (as @maironite also pointed out), their goals - Melkor wanted to destroy while Mairon was more interested in getting things to run smoothly, though both were keen on enforcing their will - and their approach to handling situations they find themselves in - whereas Melkor is often impulsive, Mairon is more patient and calculating. You can also create an ice vs. fire dynamic, though they share the fire element (Melkor used to be the Vala of Fire and Ice and is still seen using these two elements a lot). It gives them some additional friction and spice to work with.

Similarities. Aside from their differences creating chemistry, Melkor and Mairon also share a few similarities and things they can bond over to balance whatever conflicts might arise. Both seem dissatisfied with the plans of Eru and the Valar, want to create whatever they wish to create without rules being imposed on them, have a questionable moral compass at best, like screwing people over and have obsessive tendencies (more on that later). I like to think that they can nerd out about about science and magic for hours, which likely became the foundation of their relationship in the first place, and that they also engaged in deep and challenging conversations that satisfied both of them in ways other conversation partners hadn't.

The Fall. We love fallen angels and a good corruption arc. Mairon's origins as a respected member of Aulë's household - who is still remembered for his skill despite his dark deeds - and moments where he could have potentially been redeemed are documented in the Silmarillion and the subject of many interesting discussions and fanworks. However, while less pronounced and presented as far less likely in the narrative, the same applies to Melkor. Even he started out as "good" and his motives, at least early on, are also understandable: He was dissatisfied with his inability to create freely and completely on his own. You could even say he's a bit of a failed artist which... is painfully relatable. As much pain and grief as both of them have caused, it's also tragic that they couldn't overcome their pride and choose a better path, for the sake of others as well as their own, and that Melkor ended up dragging Mairon down with him; both of them would have had the ability to do truly great things if this hadn't happened.

Philosophical aspects. To read Melkor and Mairon as a couple and their fates as a tragic love story creates interesting parallels with other star-crossed lovers in Tolkien's legendarium and raises fascinating philosophical questions. Can evil love? Can love be evil? Could love have been their road to redemption or was it - at least on Mairon's part - his doom? If I had to summarize my personal take on this, I would say that Melkor unwillingly corrupted love by genuinely being in love.

If you'd like to read a (more concise) take on this aspect which also touches on some other things mentioned in this post, I highly recommend this thread by @naruthandir.

There are just so many things you can read into this relationship and themes to explore, which I appreciate so much. It never gets boring and I always find new ideas to have fun with.

Power dynamics. Now, let me preface this by saying that I'm aware that some of you prefer it one way, some of you prefer it the other way, some see the Vala/Maia power imbalance as inherently unhealthy and like to take that as a central theme of their relationship and some prefer to interpret these two has having a fairly equal relationship. However, I'm not here to debate which take is "right" or "better", nor do I have any interest to. I think that, whichever way you choose, it's an interesting concept to play around with. Did you know that Estë used to be a Maia? I honestly think it would be cool if she still was, just to bridge the divide between Valar and Maiar a bit more. Nevertheless, I think we can all agree that especially Melkor isn't interested in what other Valar think is proper or appropriate and that Mairon, ambitious as he is, probably also likes having a Valarin partner/spouse. It's also interesting as a contrast to Melkor's usual arrogance and thinking that he's above everyone, and if you need something to prove that he wouldn't categorically say no to being with a Maia, look no further than his attempt at (forcibly) marrying Arien in other versions of the story.

Kink. Well, we've talked about power dynamics already, so let's not beat around the bush. We have some hot evil gay sex on our hands here. Super freaky too, if that's your thing. This ship is, in my opinion, excellent for BDSM and was what allowed me to discover and enjoy kink for the first time (though, again, none of this is a must if you prefer other takes). You can play with their existing power dynamic, subvert it, have them live out their sadistic urges, have them do elaborate roleplays, make use of all the creepiness and weirdness of the Ainur, particularly evil ones... they even have a convenient dungeon in their basement! There's so much good and sexy Angbang smut out there and I'd like to take a quick moment to thank everyone who wrote these fics that inspired and entertained me for years - and will do so for years to come.

Queerness. There are a lot of gay ships in the Tolkien fandom and fandom in general, but I still feel like it's important to mention this aspect. In fact, if you'd allow me to share something personal: Angbang was my first contact with queer content and, while this may seem strange considering that I am a woman, it also started my journey to discover my own queerness and I will forever appreciate that (I suppose it was "femboy" Mairon in particular alongside Melkor being a raging bisexual disaster - just my headcanon, not trying to push this on anyone - that finally allowed me to break out of compulsive heterosexuality and heteronormativity). I don't know if anyone had similar experiences with Angbang, but, well, I thought if I'm making an Angbang appreciation post, this might just be the time to include it.

Obsession. Melkor is obsessed with all things bright and beautiful, and this might very well include Mairon. As far as I'm aware, him being a fire spirit like Arien and the Balrogs are is fanon, but he's at the very least associated with fire in canon (on that note: kudos to whoever came up with the "little flame" nickname, it's so cute). Meanwhile, Mairon loves power and, as mentioned above, is obsessed with Melkor and his legacy enough to not only continue what they started, but also create a religion all about him. I like to think that both of them are also very jealous, which certainly ended up being the doom of a few innocent bystanders. They're just angry and evil and insane together and it's endlessly entertaining to me.

Tolkien's accidental "evidence". This could probably be its own post (which I might do in the future, though I'd do some additional research for it), and I want to make it clear that I'm not trying to "prove" to you that Angbang is canon or anything like that, I just find it funny when canon gives me tidbits that I can use for my "agenda". First of all, there's the infamous seduction line that has singlehandedly spawned countless fanfics and most likely raised a few eyebrows:

"In the beginning of Arda Melkor seduced [Mairon] to his allegiance (...)" The Silmarillion

One of my personal favorites is also the fact that, in the Lay of Leithian, Mairon starts ranting about how cool Melkor is - after only briefly mentioning Lúthien - and gets mad at Beren and the others for not stanning his boyfriend master hard enough. To make sure everyone knows exactly how awesome Melkor is, he later made sure people pray to him and perform human sacrifices which, since even any positive effects it might have couldn't reach Melkor in the Void, was apparently just for shits and giggles and to troll some mortals. Now that is what I call commitment! There's also Melkor's trust in Mairon and his fire spirit kink, but I've mentioned that already.

Aesthetics. Spiky black armor is incredibly sexy. Then we have peak hell and hellfire aesthetics. We have crowns and rings. We have fallen angels and fire and ice, as mentioned above. And we have two incredibly hot (literally) angels kissing. You could make them fuck in an erupting volcano. It's just... yes.

To conclude: We love villains, we love dark lords, evil is fun!

What I discussed in this post is pretty much just everything I could think of, with my friends and fellow shippers giving me a few additional keywords to mention, so there's definitely more. I hope this post made some of you appreciate this ship as well, maybe sparked or rekindled some love for it, and I invite you to add on and/or share what you love about Angbang. However: I'm going to have to politely and respectfully ask you to remember that this is an appreciation and positivity post, so I don't want to see any negativity, complaints about the way other people enjoy this ship differently or shade. Time and place. Alright? Alright.

Love you!

"Whom do ye serve, Light or Mirk? Who is the maker of mightiest work? Who is the king of earthly kings, the greatest giver of gold and rings? Who is the master of the wide earth? Who despoiled them of their mirth, the vain Valar? Repeat your vows, Orcs of Bauglir! Do not bend your brows. Death to light, to law, to love; cursed be moon and stars above; may darkness everlasting old that waits outside in surges cold drown Manwë, Varda and the sun; may all is hatred be begun and all in evil ended be in the moaning of the endless Sea!" Lay of Leithian, Canto VIII

[sauron-kraut]

For the OTP questions!

Angbang: 6, 20, 31

Mairazôn: 49, 59, 75

Thank you🖤

Anbang:

Who holds a grudge the longest?

Hard one. That would be Mairon, I guess. In my hc Melkor has a stoic, somewhat divinely detached personality, which almost makes holding a grudge too earthly, too human, too insignificant for him. His wrath, on the other hand, can be terrible. I admit, I had to think about this one though.

Who's more likely to get into a bar fight?

YEAH I SEE WHAT YOU DID HERE BESTIE lmao

To answer the question: Mairon, and in a vastly different way than portrayed in that Amazon show lolololol. Imagine pretty Mairon just punching someone in the face with all his rings, then leaving doing his sassy walk, setting the bar behind him on fire with a flick of his hand.

Who insists they're the best at everything and who lets them believe it?

Woaaaaah ok so I believe they both genuinely believe the other is the best at everything (especially when it's things one of them is not too fond of doing), so letting each other believe this is just honest appreciation here.

Mairazôn:

Who's the most concerned about details and semantics and who doesn't care at all?

Mairon is the most concerned with these. Ar-Pharazôn is good at rhetorics but Mairon (as we know) is better. Also, he will bite his own tongue on a regular basis lest he correct AP even in Adûnaic. He's super judgy but will not let him know and flatters him instead.

Who's the most stubborn?

They're both. However, Mairon seduces his way around AP's stubbornness and he himself will yield most of the time to keep AP satisfied.

Whose I-Hate-Everything-And-Everyone teenage phase was the most intense/lasted the longest?

Since I don't think Mairon has had anything truly similar to this experience in incarnates I have to say AP here. :D

[flameunquenched]

@silmarillisms requested a drabble of sauron having dreams throughout season 1 of his death/disembodiment. i obliged.

spoilers for rings of power season 2 episode 1. loose tw for canon typical violence. if you ship angbang and squint a little, you'll see some angbang hints. if you ship saurondriel and squint a bit, you''ll see a few saurondriel hints.

THE RAFT

Against the raft, the ocean murmurs a gentle song, lulling those upon it towards the sweet escape that slumber offers. Beneath their wearied and thin bodies, the few planks that have offered them salvation amongst the waves rocks to and fro. Even the strongest would be hard pressed to avoid the call of sleep and none of them are at their strongest. Night had fallen with no amount of gentle serenity; rather, one moment it had been light, the Sun lazily swimming through the sky. Then, sudden as a thunderclap, the sea had simply swallowed it. One by one, those upon the raft had begun to doze, their heads drooping down to their chests or perhaps bodies slipping to the side until they found a comfortable position.

(Pain. He had felt that before. One did not work beneath Morgoth without learning the sweet piquant that was pain. Yet, this was a queer, new pain, radiating up his back, through his neck, over his shoulders. He reached for it, on his knees, staring up at the black-haired elf. The expression that marred his visage was befuddled, for his mind had yet to catch up to what had just occurred.)

He jolts into awareness with a gasp, a hand flying at once to the heraldry that encircles his neck now. Nearby, a woman’s hand is outstretched, her countenance contorted in an expression of uncertainty. Slowly, she withdraws the hand, ebony locks dancing against her wind-blasted cheeks.

“You were crying out,” she utters in that low, rough accent that he has learned flavors the speech of the Southlanders. It is becoming familiar to him; another piece of the armor that he adorns himself in. 

A heavy exhalation escapes and he sits up, waving her off. “Apologies,” he mutters in return, a grimace twisting his features. He, like she, is worn by the spray of salt and the Sun’s rays and the endless succession of day after day with nothing more than the company of one another. He turns from her, closing his eyes briefly to inhale deep the scent of salt and the odors of the other few survivors of the wreckage. 

For a second, Sauron thinks he scents blood as black as pitch. He shivers, fingers tightening on the sigil about his neck.

NÚMENOR

Sprawled upon the bench in a Númenorean cell, he supposes that perhaps allowing himself to be so baited into a fight (an alley fight, of all things) might have been a poor decision. Whether it was his most poor decision ever made, he cannot yet say but it certainly must be quite up there. Yet still, their laughter rankles; even now, hours later, he can still hear their gross mockery. 

Even now, it elicits a clenched fist and visions of drowning them in their own blood. 

Anger still remains upon his tongue, a foul taste. He had known better once. When he had worn a different skin, this surely would not have happened. Yet, here he is now, imprisoned for inciting a fight in an alley. 

Releasing a muted groan, he moves to lie upon the bench. The intent is not to slumber, for he yearns to resist that call whenever possible. Yet sleep creeps upon him all the same.

(Hands. They were everywhere. Claws entangled into his auburn tresses. Raking at his flesh, ripping at his clothing. There were hands and there were blades, biting into him, stabbing him over and over. He was on his knees, caught, trapped, helpless even as he struggled, fought for his feet, fought to rise. He could not let them do this. He who was their master! And so he rose, lashing out magically, savoring the shocked expressions upon their dumb faces.

It did little good. He was but one and one can be overwhelmed by many. Sauron knew that. He remembered well how Morgoth had fallen in the end. He would not fall. He would fight. They would not take him down.)

The gasp echoes as he sits up, teeth bared against enemies long dead. His gaze falls to his hand, which trembles. Did he not know better now than to allow for sleep? Sleep brings nothing but the threat of these torments unending. 

Rising, Sauron gives his head a hard shake. They are dead. He yet lives and will continue to live. The Moriondor is out there somewhere, a reminder of failure. Just the thought suffices to force a growl between clenched teeth and fingers close until they ache. 

There is time still. He of the Ainur and the Son of the Dark have all the time they need. They will meet again.

EREGION

(He was down. On his back, blood seeping from dozens of mortal wounds, he laid there, staring up into what little light seeped through the merciless faces of the Orcs. His army was slaughtering him and there was nothing now he could do to stop it. He had fought, killing many of them, but for each one he killed, four more seemed to swarm him. The light was fading. He had survived so much, accomplished so much, for this? For death at the hands of the mockery of Elves, twisted into ruination at the hands of his master?

He would be back. Sauron promised it even as he lay dying, his last breath gathering within his lungs and then escaping from his open, bloodied mouth. He would be back.)

“My lord!” The words are distorted, echoing down a long way. “My lord, wake up! It is but a dream, wake up!”

Eyes flutter open and up he finds himself gazing into a worried visage of a fair and radiant Elf. For half a moment, it is on his tongue to call her Galadriel, despite the fact that Galadriel is pale where this Elf is dark. He gazes at her with confusion; she gazes at him with concern. 

“Are you quite alright, my lord? Lady Galadriel brought you in very weak. You were very nearly lost.” She frets visibly, hands pressing together before she moves closer to further examine him. “Oh! You’re probably thirsty,” she murmurs, reaching for a cup of water and offering it to him.

“Thank you,” he mutters, voice hoarse and raw. The water helps and when he goes to sit up, the Elf tuts but does not attempt to stop him. 

“Where am I?” With effort, bare feet come to touch a cool floor. The sensation is oddly soothing and he allows a bit more weight to rest, simply to enjoy the feeling again. 

The Elf shifts uncomfortably, her brows furrowed to a worried expression that only emphasizes her natural beauty. “You are in the Elven city of Eregion, my lord. Home of Lord Celebrimbor.” After a moment, she moves forward to aid him in rising fully. “Lady Galadriel will want to know you have awoken. Stay here, my lord. I will return with her shortly.”

Her words bring forth a smile to his lips. “Where else would I go?” This he asks softly as she moves to the door.

I’m exactly where I want to be.

[mirkwood]

your angbang posting has been giving me LIFE!!! so 7+ angbang for the kiss prompt pleaseee (it just feels right)

hey ashleigh!!! thank you for the ask, it does feel right indeed <3

Prompt 7 : to shut them up

Pairing : Melkor / Mairon

Melkor is… talking.  Mairon is too tired and annoyed to actually bother with listening to what he has to say. Utumno has been a cacophony of noises and screams and shouts from its inhabitants that now it’s quite impossible to focus for even one more second on what his Lord is saying. The Maia’s gaze falls on Melkor’s lips, moving and forming words that he can’t quite bother to actually listen to or even try to decipher. He really hopes his Master is not sharing one of his grand ideas. That would mean he has to actually pay attention, plan it through and put it in action. In any other case, he would do it in the blink of an eye, so willing and ready as he is to please his Lord.  Now, all he wants is for Melkor to stop talking.  He should not be able to get a headache. It is impossible. But here he is, sprawled on their shared bed, with black dots dancing behind his shut eyelids.  “What say you, Mairon?” he hears Melkor ask, and for a moment after, all is quiet.  Mairon smiles in relief, a big wide smile that is quite not him. He is moderate and reserved with his reactions, anyone acquainted with the Maia would know this. It is an unsettling sight.  And Melkor notices this as well. His brows furrowed in confusion, he observes his Mairon from where he is standing a few feet away from their bed.  He thinks he is beautiful. The very epitome of perfection and grace on his bed, with his golden locks all over the pillows and his body languidly stretched over the sheets.  Mairon rests his hands against his stomach, the fabric of his loose tunic soft beneath his fingers. He feels the empty spot next to him dip and shift under the weight of Melkor settling on the bed.  “You know,” Melkor begins, and Mairon inwardly curses everything that has ever existed. He can feel Melkor’s gaze on him, soft yet calculating.  “I believe it would be wise to follow that course of action,” Melkor continues, and Mairon has not the slightest inkling of what he is talking about. “Whatever you say, my precious,” Mairon responds, and he can practically sense the subtle tilt of Melkor's head. “What do you mean? Do you no longer believe we ought to–”  Melkor’s words are cut off abruptly when Mairon lifts his head from the pillows and reaches for him, fists clutching his robes and pulling him into a rough, messy kiss. Their teeth clash, but Mairon pays it no mind.  Despite his initial shock, Melkor eagerly returns the kiss, his hands resting on Mairon’s hips, pushing him back down on the bed. Mairon complies willingly, trapped between the pillows and Melkor’s body.  Yet he pulls away too soon, his head tilting back and away from Melkor’s attempts to follow him and taste him again.  Mairon gently presses two fingers against Melkor’s parted lips.  “Later, precious,” he promises and Melkor grunts in protest. “Hush now.” For once, his Master relents and actually listens to him.  The blessed silence that follows is the greatest of gifts bestowed upon Mairon.

Send me a ship and a number

[crackinthecup]

20 Questions for Fic Writers

@gardensofthemoon thank you so much for the tag! It was super interesting reading your responses :D <3

1. How many works do you have on AO3? 51

2. What’s your total AO3 word count? 465,678

3. What fandoms do you write for? Bold to assume I write at all I've always mainly just written for the Silm BUT I have recently become obsessed with The Locked Tomb series so miiiiiiight do some writing in that universe. At some point. Maybe.

4. What are your top five fics by kudos?

Yield to the Moment takes the cake here, which is not surprising given that it's a 300k Angbang modern AU slowburn beast of a fic.

Then we've got Strange New World, set in my Swords 'verse, which takes a look at Melkor and Mairon post-Dagor Dagorath through a mental health-y and relationship/character study lens.

Third up is A bond once called fealty, also in the Swords 'verse.

Then there's The Metal Cage, which is shameless Angbang PWP focused on chastity play.

And finally A quiet sort of introspection, also part of the Swords 'verse, a bit experimental in the sense of taking Melkor's POV in second person.

5. Do you respond to comments? Always! I feel it's only fair if someone's taken the time to share their thoughts with me. Plus it's often such a fun, creative space where you get to bounce around ideas with the commenter.

6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending? Not entirely sure, actually. Don't think I tend to write particularly angsty endings. No Other Choice, maybe? It's about the Fëanorian attack on the Havens and the choice Elwing makes when she jumps into the sea.

7. What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending? Probably YTTM. I'm pretty pleased with the ending actually; feels like it pulls together a bunch of narrative threads and highlights all the amazing growth the characters have done. Also, it's a wedding at the end of a very long, very bumpy slowburn.

8. Do you get hate on fics? I have, yeah, years and years ago, around an abusive take on Angbang; but generally I find that the Silm fandom is very lovely and very welcoming.

9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind? I do! Quite a lot of it haha. I think, for me, the appeal isn't so much the physical act in and of itself, but what's going on for the characters behind the scenes as it were, emotionally/psychologically. Especially with a ship like Angbang where they spectacularly fail at talking to each other so a lot of juicy unspoken stuff gets acted out through physical intimacy.

10. Do you write crossovers? What’s the craziest one you’ve written? Nope, never written a crossover, nor do they hold much appeal for me personally.

12. Have you ever had a fic translated? I have. Sadly those fics had been written around 2015-16 and I deleted them a few years back at a time when my mental health was... spicy. I couldn't say whether the translations are still out there somewhere.

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before? Yep! YTTM started out as a co-write.

14. What’s your all time favorite ship? Angbang. There's just a lot of layers to their dynamic that scratch an itch in my brain. Power imbalance. Fucked-up-ness. Possessiveness/protectiveness. Worship. Loyalty.

15. What’s a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will? I've got a WIP from almost ten years ago about Celebrimbor in Gondolin and I'm not sure if the interest/time/motivation is still there for me to ever pick it up again :')

16. What are your writing strengths? Hmm I tend to put a fair amount of thought into characters' emotional experiences and I also enjoy playing around with fun ways to describe things.

17. What are your writing weaknesses? I guess there's a flipside to focusing on emotional experiences in that sometimes I might humanise characters like the Ainur too much and lose some of their eldritchness. I also tend to be quite disorganised with my plotting, and by disorganised I mean that I just sit down and start writing without a plan or outline and sometimes I can end up scrambling to tie everything together and make it make sense and I'm not sure how effective that is. Also also, I don't find endings very easy to come up with.

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic? Sure, if done purposefully in a way that furthers the plot or tells me something about the characters.

19. First fandom you wrote for? Harry Potter, I think! Those fics are not on the internet anymore and that is probably for the best haha.

20. Favourite fic you’ve written? Ohhh see, I don't actually like my own writing very much (cheers, perfectionism) and I very very rarely re-read it. But I do think some bits in YTTM are fun, and my latest ficcy that I've written (Reason to Try) which is a ficcy of @tarmairons' ficcy kinda shifted something in my brain for the better and I revisit it sometimes on bad mental health days.

Let's see which lovely people to tag: @markedasinfernal, @elevenelvenswords, @undercat-overdog, @lvsifer, @foxindarkness and anyone else who sees this and would like to have a go (if you want to! zero pressure)

[winds-of-zephyr416]

Uuhuhhhhhh sooooo there's this thing I do when I'm writing and.... uhhhh......

Technically these bullet points are there to keep me on track between writing sessions. Technically. But you know what else they're really good for? MEMES. Memes and dumbassery.

Observe:

(The top one is from a doc of self-indulgent Angbang oneshots, the bottom is for another very self-indulgent au where Sauron becomes Smol. What can I say, I'm a simple man).

[glorfindel-of-imladris]

Russingon and Angbang

(Russingon was answered here!)

Oh wait a minute— did Angbang actually get a near perfect score? 🤣

Okay, but Angbang. I don't actually write it nor am I active on that side of fandom, but let me tell you about how this ship gets the most irl air time from me, talking about Tolkien to normies. In fact, as recent as a week ago, I talked about the glory of Sauron as a literary villain on a train ride that I'm sure half the passengers didn't ask for but they had to listen to anyway. 😂

Sauron—and yes, I do call him that because I like my villains to have earned their titles—is hands down the best, most compelling villain ever written. He is my top example of what Lawful Evil looks like. You can tell he is intelligent, and with that intelligence comes his cunning, the skilled and organised way with which he goes about things, how he plans things and is methodical with their execution. The fact that he was originally a Maia of Aulë is even also very interesting, because you know that group is one that values skill and the creation of things. Morgoth, meanwhile, kind of brute forces his way through everything. He has an idea of what Arda is supposed to be, and kind of stomps and tantrums his way to seeing it all come to being. Despite these differences, and how I know for a fact that Sauron is smarter than Morgoth (lol), Sauron was loyal to Morgoth until the end. Even when Morgoth had grown weak, having carelessly given himself to Arda, and even weak enough for Sauron to have been arguably stronger than him, Sauron never attempted to usurp him. He might have been disappointed by him, but I believe that was more because had Sauron had his way, there would have been better ways for Morgoth to achieve his goals that would not have weakened him the way his choices did. Had Morgoth been more successful with his marring of Arda and had not been captured by the Valar, Sauron would have continued to be his loyal lieutenant. There is something compelling about this kind of loyalty, especially from someone so intelligent, cunning, manipulative, and all the things that Sauron is.

Also, I like to joke around that Sauron is a Whore™ and he probably has the most number of ships in the fandom (we know silvergifting is super popular, and of course the seduction of Ar-Pharazôn and Númenor, he also probably seduced the Nazgûl lbr, and maybe a random hot Rohirrim, you can't convince me otherwise), but I do believe Morgoth was the "love of his life"—or whatever equates to it among, you know, evil beings with evil ends. I don't actually think about Angbang strictly in a romantic sense, although yes, in fact there is a lot of parallels. I dunno! I kid you not when I say I sit and think about Angbang at least a few times a year.

[curiouselleth]

🕯️ ⇢ on a scale from 1 to 10, how much do you enjoy editing? why is that?

🥑 ⇢ you accidentally killed somebody, which mutual(s) do you text for help?

🎲 ⇢ what stops you from writing more in your free time? 

🍄 ⇢ share a head canon for one of your favourite ships or pairings

🧩 ⇢ what will make you click away from a fanfiction immediately?

Hi @thecoolblackwaves! Thanks for the ask!

🕯️ - I'd say a 5, I don't mind it but I also have the "oh I can edit as I write!" habit, lol 😅

🥑 - Hmm, I feel like @quixoticanarchy would have some excellent tips for getting rid of the body, and @maellor for an alibi 😂

🎲 - homework, and needing to sleep- okay but seriously, sometimes I just don't have motivation or ideas, I'll want to write and I'll open the doc and it'll just sit there and I won't come up with much. Or, if I can, it's forced and not usually great stuff. I tend to have maybe 2 months or so of motivation and inspiration at a time, then I'll have a month or two with none lol.

🍄 - oh I don't really do a lot of shipping or pairings, but I had a funny nonsense Angbang theory; that Sauron and Morgoth absolutely gush about each other to anyone unfortunate enough to be within earshot, but fiercely deny it to each other. Maedhros and Gothmog had brief bonding over this before reality set in again and they realized who and where they were. Whenever they would get fed up with each other they'd visit Maedhros on Thangorodrim and vent about each other but it would turn into gushing after about 0.2 seconds. Maedhros quickly reaches the conclusion that he prefers the ever lasting horrible boredom.

🧩 - I haven't been reading new (to me at least) fanfics lately, I've only really been continue reading the ones I've been following for a while because I've been consumed by The Projects TM lately. (So. Many. Projects. Sewing, painting, writing... there is so much right now lol.) So I honestly don't really remember, I'm pretty good at filtering my searches too lol.

[urwendii]

Day 4 / Day 5 : Fire & Unlight @silmsmutweek

pairing: Angbang (Melkor x Mairon) - lowkey oneside

wordcount: 1k

rating: nsfw 🔞

Trigger warning: Dark fic / dubcon sex & bj / domsub / body horror (sort of) / unhappy void shenanigans / angst, no happy ending.

-> (i cannot stress this enough, not to read it if this is bothering you. You are responsible for the content you choose to see.)

There is nothing pretty about the way Melkor holds him, nothing beatific in the way his Song is carving scars over the fabric of his ëala - of what remains of it at any rate. Tendrils of unlight wrap around him and tighten until Melkor can hold Mairon in the palm of his hand.

This is no heartfelt reunion. The Void has made his former lover the monster they talk about. This is Sauron’s punishment, this is Mairon’s failure. Here, in the Nothingness that is somehow even less than that, he is at the mercy of the Dark and Terrible. 

There is no ring to save him this time, no allegiance to plead, no words of love to whisper. Even sounds are absent when Mairon screams his pain at being torn open without any kindness. There is no physicality to recoil at, no eyes to close, no tears to hide.

He has spent so long untouched and uncared for, but this is no caring. It is a dissection. Melkor’s ëala forces itself in his, unrelenting, unforgiving and Mairon cannot do anything but take and submit in this environment that is all but timeless. 

There is no ending to pray for, he is unmade already and this is eternity looping on itself for he knows the lore the elves are afraid of is a lie. There is no absolution, no battle, no escape. 

Servant of the Dark he once was, Master of illusions and lies, Mairon would be on his knees choking on the heaviness of the Mightiest if it were possible. 

His ruin then comes forth in the subtle change of sensory deprivations, for suddenly he is drinking in the chalice of eternity and alight with flames of splendid gold and it burns too much, too bright, too loud.

There’s a shift behind him - he has a body now, burning cold hands on his hips, nails racking his skin, this is a memory he thinks, a piece of the past transformed into an oniric chapel where minds of the present are forced into a display of aphotic mimicry. 

Melkor is deep within his body, hips slamming brutally and Mairon’s gasps are forced out of him, head buried in the pillows beneath.

Mine, mine, mine Melkor sings, grunts and laughs and he wants to say that yes, he always has been, yes because Mairon accomplished nothing without his Master, yes because there is nothing else to fight for, nothing else that matters and please, please gives him back a purpose, a sense of identity. 

But the hand that pulls on his hair, squeezes around his neck tells another story, there is no more love and forgiveness, this is the new purpose for there is nothing in the Void, no Kingdom to defend, no tower to build, no lands to conquer. 

Melkor flips him on his back to push his legs against his chest, somehow the bed is gone now and dark myst covers most of his Master and the cock that is shoved back in him is half tangible half ethereal. 

The hand around his neck tightens until black spots dance around his vision, sends arousal and fear mixed together down his spine.

You are nothing Mairon but the conduit of my will, have you forgotten. 

He has. He has not. It never left him. He had wanted to still be more, even without him. 

Your existence is to serve me, there is no escape. 

The world dissolves into fog, somehow he feels as if falling even though gravity does not exist in this place and when he lifts his eyes once more, kneeling on the dark floor of a mockery of what Angband used to be, Melkor is standing above him garbed in dark tendrils, one long hand stroking himself. 

Crawl Mairon,

He shivers.

Mairon. 

He’s on his hands and knees half a second later. Like a supplicant in a now-sunken temple he awaits for the divine sacrament, for a hint of something behind those onyx half formed eyes. Melkor’s face is a ruin, half of it consumed by Unlight, the other so pretty, so young, so like what Mairon loved so ardently back then. 

An icy hand yanks him by his hair and forces him to swallow him to the base and Mairon forces himself to remember he is not of substance, but held together by memories. His throat eases around the swollen member, tears pool at the corners of his eyes and Melkor seems elsewhere and ignores the pleading in Mairon’s eyes. 

Look at me, please, I tried. I tried so hard to win for us. Please love me. I am yours, I have been yours always. 

He can’t cry with Melkor’s dick so deep in his throat, he can only chokes and presses the heel of his hand against his own arousal to relieve some of the pressure.

This, is a mistake. 

The formless mass of darkness that is his lover swirls angrily and icicles creep the length of his arm, imprisoning his fingers, crushing his flesh and bone and with an angry gesture Melkor severs his arm entirely all the while still thrusting between Mairon’s lips.

His shout of pain - but is there even pain if there is no body in the first place? - is muffled by thick flesh that turns colder than the coldest ices of the one Helcaraxë. Mairon’s fires - still there despite it all, formless and purposeless he might be but he still is a spirit of fire - surges back to knit at the bleeding flesh. 

Melkor smiles, ugly and sharp then groans and releases. Mairon swallows around seed that tastes of unlight and heartbreak and he does not know which one is his. 

You were a failure Mairon. 

I know he wants to say but he is back to being nothing, bodiless, suspended in emptiness ready to consume every inch of his spirit. It whispers of hunger insatiable. 

I can do better with you.

But Melkor is retreating back into the vacuumness of their prison and Mairon screams because there is pain now, the nihility of his own existence, the unanswered prayers, the yearning to be something, not to be alone again. 

Please, he cries, please do not leave me again. 

But there is no light in the Void, only darkness eternal.