#what a throwback. good golly!

[youtappedout]

[catboymoments]

can i just say that i love that Hyacinth has such a "Guys who say shit like Golly/Wowzers!" type of vocabulary??? He's such a cutie. Throwback to the Boscha and Willow comic where he doesn't even repeat Boscha using the fuck word and just says "effing around." What a good

YESSSSS HES SOSO SILLY he doesn’t like swearing!!!!!!

[danpuff-ao3]

slash ships to get to know me

Thanks for the tag @greenmegsnoham! And apologies for the lateness!

Rules: Name at least five (no upper limit) slash (M/M) ships you love. Each from a different fandom.

Harry Potter/Severus Snape

Snarry. The Chosen Prince. Mr. Sass and Mr. Snark. The ship of my soul. Oh how I adore them!

Genuinely, there is too much I love about them, and I feel like I talk about them ad nauseum. But I can't help it!! The angst, the drama, the scandal, the taboo, the baggage, the tension, the potential!!!! There's so much there to play with!!!!

They were also my introduction to shipping near twenty years ago. Wee lil 11 year old Danni played with Google for hte first time, stumbled into an explicit Drarry fic, and stumbled out with a curiosity for Snarry, which turned into a lifelong passion! They're where my heart is, and where I always return to, wherever else I explore in my life. Other ships, other fandoms, but I always come home to Snarry. (Cuz they're soulmates.) (No, you cannot convince me otherwise.)

Dean Winchester/Castiel

Destiel!! Ahh!! Wow what a throwback even typing the name is. Listen, Wincest does not scare me, okay? I read Flowers in the Attic when I was like 8 okay? And while I've read the odd Wincest...it just didn't do it for me. I'm not a big Sam Girl, really. But I am a Dean Girl. And when Cass came onto the scene?? I fell HARD for that angel, let me tell you! And is as natural for a gal who played with Barbies, I saw my two faves and wanted to smush their mouths together.

Plus...c'mon. The human (Hunter) and the angel???? How fun! Also: the potential for internalized homophobia?? I've read many a Destiel fic with that and my golly do I eat that up like candy. Also: a Destiel series introduced me to the concept of "demisexuality" which led me on a years'-long journey to learning about the asexuality spectrum and learning more about myself! (The Writing on the Wall, it's called, for those curious.)

Steve Rogers/Tony Stark

STONY! SUPERHUSBANDS! OH WOWEE. The first ship besides Snarry I ever wrote!

For starters, we're back on my "smushing my faves' faces together" bs. Cuz my Top 3 Marvel heroes are: Captain America, Iron Man, and Spiderman. Judge me all you want, the heart wants what the heart wants. And my heart wants Steve and Tony to make sweet love and adopt Peter Parker.

Also: our handsome boy scout + the rebellious playboy?? Weird family connections with Steve having known Howard Stark. Also: another potential for internalized homophobia! (It feels really wrong to be so excited about that potential, but listen....I grew up in the Bible belt. Let me deal.) Steve being the man in charge and Mr. Goody-Goody, and Tony forever wanting to butt heads and rub off the Golden Boy's golden shine. Glorious. Much potential for angst and challenging dysfunctional dynamics which I am super here for.

Izuku Midoriya/Katsuki Bakugou

BAKUDEKU. My sweet cinnamon roll and our angry boi. Such fun! Midoriya is such a sweetheart. Bakugou screams a lot. Clearly a match made in heaven. Lots of name calling (looking at you Bakugou) and emotional constipation (again: Bakugou.) Strong brave bois being very heroic and sexy. Also:....I love them both. And want them to kiss.

They're also the ship where even when I'm not actively seeking them out, if a Bakudeku art or story looks interesting: I'm clicking! I'm really behind in MHA. And I've never actively read in the fandom. But if I see it and it looks good, I'M IN. Which is just odd for me, but ah well.

Hannibal Lecter/Will Graham.

Hannigram. Murder Husbands.

...

...Murder Husbands.

......MURDER HUSBANDS.

Need I say more? I thought not.

Tagging: anyone who wants in!

[anotherblogaboutguys]

Throwback Thursday

Here are my favorite ten songs on the U.S. Billboard Hot 100 Singles chart for the week ending 10/22/1966

10. The Monkees - "Last Train To Clarksville"

9. James and Bobby Purify - "I'm Your Puppet"

8. Neil Diamond - "Cherry, Cherry"

7. ? (Question Mark) and The Mysterians - "96 Tears"

6. Los Bravos - "Black Is Black"

5. Mitch Ryder and The Detroit Wheels - "Devil With A Blue Dress On / Good Golly Miss Molly (Medley)"

4. The Four Tops - "Reach Out, I'll Be There"

3. The Supremes - "You Can't Hurry Love"

2. The Left Banke - "Walk Away, Renee"

1 Jimmy Ruffin - "What Becomes Of The Brokenhearted?"

[thewreckkelly]

Watch "Could Only Happen In Ireland" on YouTube

GOOD GOLLY IT’S DOLLY (My Mother Myself) 

I love my Mum – loved her when I was under her care, loved her throughout my independence, love her now she’s in someone else’s care. Of course I’m aware such maternal love is by no means exclusive and undoubtedly, while the expression of such love tends to soften with distance and age, it remains an emotional bond that is a true unbreakable.

Recently I’ve been helping a florist – who also happens to be a great friend - with an online marketing campaign for ‘Mothers Day’ and, (during the course of concocting and plagiarising four line sentiments and graphic displays of floral fawning) , got to thinking of my Mum and what we have shared throughout a lifetime of mutual love.

A strange highlight dominated my walk through that particular past!

-o- 

The year was 1980 (I think) and I was slowly ridding myself of the adolescent petulance properly associated with teenage angst while also - willingly and without excuse or apology – continuing to embrace the evolutionary revolutionary mindset of ‘Punk’.

Don’t get me wrong I had never fallen into the ‘Mohawk’, ‘Piercings’, ‘Gobbing’, ‘Pogoing’ or ‘Safety Pin’ syndrome - not this good Catholic boy. It was more than enough for me that the freedom of expression associated with the genre felt ridiculously  inspirational and challenging in its raw depth – ‘Never Mind the Bollox’ proving a universally perfect mantra of how to be young in that very beneficial yet restrictive first world of change and changelings.

My Mum was the polar opposite in her musical taste and, (with a small ‘c’), conservative view of people, society and trends. Perry Como was more her cup of tea than the subversive Sinatra or Elvis while country music provided the stories of life she could relate to. Her idea of rocking out was to blare the Ray Conniff’ big band singers through my Da’s good stereo speakers on Sunday mornings - after mass - while letting go of any dancing inhibitions as she prepared the traditional roast.

The funny thing is; I sort of liked her music – without ever admitting such a ‘terrible’ thing to my friends and so called musical peers of course. There is an argument I liked the stuff she liked in much the same way liking anything that defines a good person has a habit of doing, but I don’t believe that was the reason.

I was too young and self-obsessed to understand that all was not simple and simple was, most certainly, not all – yet somehow aware enough to know without really knowing. Later I would realise my Mum had a terrific universal ear for much of what was good and great but back then ...... well .......

My Mum’s life, at the time, was neat and tidy by design - honed from a lifetime of consideration for others and struggle against an incomplete education, social gender relegation and being without too often. Mine was naturally a mess - a snap semi considered series of decisions and influences borne out of immediacy and yearning coloured by arrogance and naivety – a rebel searching for a ‘because’ if you like.

I had spent the summer just gone in London immersing myself in a musical and literary culture that was maturing from the raucous irregular  nature of punk and had taken in lots of pub and small venue gigs that ranged in influence from ‘The Jam’ to ‘Elvis Costello’ to ‘John Cooper Clarke’ to ‘Jimmy Pursey’ to ‘Billy Bragg’ to 'Kafka' to 'Tom Wolfe' to 'Philip Larkin' .

It was my coming of age moment when all of such seemed terribly exciting and dangerous to the person I was and surely massively influential in opening up my, (up till then), purposely covert disdain for authority and establishment

In the autumn of that year, weighed down by the morass of all such personal contradictions, I secured two front row seats for a Country & Western show at the RDS - with some degree of trepidation – to treat and play chaperone to my Mum, who was a big fan and unlikely - at that time - to actually enjoy or have the opportunity to avail of such an occasion.

And so it came to pass the two of us left the semi in the suburbs and drove to a monolith in the better part of town to see Dolly Parton do her thing.

-o- 

The Royal Dublin Showgrounds in Ballsbridge, Dublin, was, and probably still is, a throwback statement in architecture and class driven membership designed to promote and embrace all of what was good from the Protestant protectorate time of Victoria - while actually succeeding in highlighting much of what was insidious about those whom believed in a realm upon which the sun would never be expected to set. A venue where aspiring middle-class Dubliners and those beyond the pale could, on occasion, sample and digest possibilities their betters expected them to aspire to but rarely achieve.

The entrance to the RDS is signature and a facade of understated power – inviting and intimidating in measure and construction. I hadn’t been in the exhibition hall before and was hugely underwhelmed by its ordinariness, the starkness of the concrete floors and rows of institutional collapsible chairs set out in slightly skewed rows. The room was cavernous, very bright with a stage that looked more suited to a communist political convention than a glitzy C&W extravaganza.

Mum was dressed to the nines, which had worried me slightly to begin with only for such fear to rapidly evaporate upon arrival - it was twenty year old me, dressed as conservatively as I could allow in Wrangler jeans, Polo shirt and black suit jacket, that looked out of place among the throngs of Sunday best middle aged men and women taking their seats in an excited, orderly and happy manner. I felt like the proverbial fish out of water and had to reach deep to marry myself to my Mother’s mounting excitement and sense of occasion.

The support act that night was a solo artist called Kevin Johnson. Here I was on relatively safe ground as his big song was; ‘Rock & Roll I Gave You All the Best Years of My Life’ to which I knew all the lyrics and felt some level of identification with. He was a good competent performer with the troubadour’s presence and I remember being impressed at his professionalism along with enjoying the Americana folksiness of the set. I relaxed a touch and, when he finished off with that song, felt at least I’d got my money’s worth and anything else would be a bonus.

A sense of fervent excitement in the hall grew as we waited for the headliner and, to a point, became infectious. I genuinely had no idea what to expect and the sense of expectation bordering on privilege emanating from this packed venue caused me to doubt any possibly disingenuous pre-conceptions I had inwardly held since I’d bought the tickets and surprised Mum.

The lights went down, the band silently took to the stage as shadows. A fanfare of guitars, fiddle, bass and drums in galloping beat broke the deafening silence of the seated audience and then .......

‘GOOD GOLLY IT’S DOLLY’ issued forth from a disembodied deep male voice - in the pronounced accent of a Southern American State - to rapturous applause.

A spotlight broke the darkness and concentrated its stardust on the wings from which a tiny giant bounded and danced her way to centre stage with more energy than Sellafield.

Clad in a very revealing figure hugging silver diamantes laden dress, sporting perfect make-up on cheeky cultured facial features pronounced with ruby red lipstick – all artistically framed by an abundance of perfectly coffered Dixie blonde tresses.

This would be first lady of country music lit the auditorium miles beyond the ability of mere electricity.... Oh yes Ms Dolly Parton made an entrance you couldn’t beat with a stick.

The show is a blur – I do remember her doing ‘Applejack’ on the banjo, with ridiculous big painted nails not being a bother at all – and the best I can actually recall for the most part is before you could wail ‘Jolene’  I found myself cheering, clapping, dancing and singing along with songs I didn’t know in the company of equally uninhibited people I didn’t know and wising the show would never end. This was new to me; this was a living example of the best at what they do, doing it for me along with everyone else and delivering on every level.

The famous composer of melodies, Thomas Moore, once wrote:

‘And the best works of nature can only improve – when we see them reflected in looks that we love’ 

When Dolly caused us all to settle down, mid set, and invited each and every one present to relive a childhood memory of Motherly love with her soft ballad; ‘Coat of Many Colours’, I glanced smilingly at my Mum and her returned look allowed an understanding of exactly what Tom Moore was getting at.

Thanks for giving me Dolly Mum, (I’ve held on to her ever since), and, of course, all the rest of the other stuff.

Happy Mother’s Day

[chicagoindiecritics]

New from Every Movie Has a Lesson by Don Shanahan: MOVIE REVIEW: Stargirl

(Image: polygon.com)

STARGIRL— 4 STARS

When you take a gander at Grace VanderWaal’s title character in Stargirl, you probably don’t think “unassuming.” The loud outfit seems goudy. The ukulele on her back reeks of ostentatiousness. And, by golly, that rat on her shoulder screams straight-up weird. Miraculously and sweetly, director Julia Hart makes all of this boldness as unassuming as possible, free of arrogance or pretension. The modesty of Jerry Spinelli’s hit source novel is intact and invigorating on this Disney+ original.

The storyteller circling the briefly introduced orb of oddity is Leo Borlock (TV actor Graham Verchere, recently of The Good Doctor and Supergirl). He and his widowed single mother (Scandal cast member Darby Stanchfield) moved to Mica, Arizona in elementary school. He decided very quickly that laying low more than standing out ensured his civic survival. Now a 16-year-old high school junior, Leo makes no waves in his friend circle working the school’s TV talk show “Hot Seat” and holding down his trumpeter’s place in the fledgling marching band.

That all changes when Leo gets a glimpse at the alluring Stargirl Caraway, the mysterious new girl to the popularity battleground hallways after years as a home-schooled local. She draws stares, gawks, and quizzical words with her every action. The eyes multiply when Stargirl steps out to midfield at halftime of a losing football game for an impromptu performance. Rocking the ukulele and belting her encouragement in song, the spotlight never leaves Grace VanderWaal or her character from there on out.

LESSON #1: UNIQUENESS AND TALENT ARE POPULAR— Soon enough, Stargirl’s inspiring presence turns everyone’s spirits and luck around. An uncommon kindness seemingly pours out of her smile and sparkling eyes. Stargirl goes from peculiar to popular overnight as a new centerpiece cheerleader that roots for everything big and small. Her aura is something intangible for everyone, especially our Leo. 

LESSON #2: ACCEPTING BOLDNESS— It goes without saying that the bold stand out. Boldness can be too much in the same way shyness is too little, or how impulsive doers act without thinking while meek thinkers never go out and do. “Differentness,” as Spinelli once called it in the book, can incite emulation and ostracism with equally unknown odds or results. The catalyst or the tonic for any acceptance is ego, and Stargirl doesn’t have a hint of one.

Leo is clearly smitten and seeks to spend time following Stargirl. These opportunities are welcomed in return by her. Their whimsical and chaste sweep of young love changes his soul and challenges him to re-embrace his confidence to be different like he used to be. All goes swimmingly well until a pair of acts of kindness are taken the wrong way in a calamitous social fallout.

It is in the shared moments away from the fickle crowds that Stargirl shows its essence. What would be loud and bouncing bounds in other high school/YA romances moves instead with soothing saunters among the saguros silhouetting the New Mexico magic hours doubling as Arizona. Excellent camera polish from cinematographer Bryce Fortner (Ingrid Goes West) to not overlight these sequences and more. Credit for shrewdly nailing the vibe of Spinelli’s book into a teeming and tidy movie goes to director and co-writer Julia Hart, her Fast Color filmmakin partner Jordan Horowitz, and Dumplin’ screenwriter Kristin Hahn. Like the author, they put maturity above the manic pixie dream girl trope that threatens to be overbearing.

Verchere and VanderWaal exudes comfortable chemistry that is not over-spiked. He is steady where he needs to be, dotes where he needs to dote, but the showcase was alway going to be her. Grace VanderWaal, showing true charm on camera, rightly has her multiple talents on display in this, her acting debut after rising to stardom as an America’s Got Talent champion. VanderWaal is often backed by the strumming and dreamy electronica bends of composer Rob Simonsen and vinyl-friendly playlist of throwbacks. Her inescapable voice fills the soundtrack, our ears, and our hearts (stay through the credits for the full effect).

LESSON #3: NONCONFORMITY SHOULD BE COMFORTABLE— Without question, the largest and best takeaway from Stargirl is the lack of shame one should feel for their differences. Stargirl’s contagious morale comes from an easy poise and an empathetic aim to please. Much like Leo, the people who know you and truly get you are the only people you need to be popular with. Don’t hide from love or loves that are out of the ordinary. That’s precisely what becomes the extraordinary.

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[avani008]

Please make a list of books you'd recommend for people to read! The ones you love, whatever genre! XD

Oh golly, the short answer is that I ardently love ALL THE BOOKS EVER. But assuming that you guys already know about the big names (Harry Potter, Jane Austen Tolkien, etc.), but there are some of my other, less well-known favorites by category:

Mythology (non-Indian): The Song of Achilles, Madeleine Miller– beautiful, lyrical prose and a first person narrative that humanizes characters who’d I previously found very unsympathetic. Tragic but also with a twist at the end that makes it all worth it, IMO. One of my favorites.

High Fantasy: The Chalion books, Lois McMaster Bujold. Honestly one of my favorites for characterization, but also notable for having genuinely good, sympathetic protagonists who make hard choices – and one of the most bittersweet and interesting depictions of divinity I’ve seen in fantasy.

Humor: Anything by Terry Pratchett, at all. His humor can be a bit broad and slapstick at first, but scattered between them are beautiful insights about the world at large. My personal favorites are some of the stand-alones, especially The Truth (if you want to read about fantasy Lois Lane and Clark Kent minus Superman) and especially Monstrous Regiment (girl dresses up as boy to join the army. The war….becomes rather wackier than she ever imagined.)

Romance: Georgette Heyer! Honestly, after Austen, I feel she’s one of the few historical romance authors who really focuses on how absurd the lives of these people were, making her books delightfully laugh-out-loud funny and the closest thing to Austen that I’ve found. Particular recs are The Unknown Ajax (summary: Local Man Trolls Extended Family), Frederica (summary: Local Man Trolled By [Very] Extended Family), and Devil’s Cub (summary; Amazing Heroine Saddled with Deadbeat Hero She Doesn’t Deserve).

Historical Fiction: Ooh, there are many authors who I love in this genre, but my especial favorite is Gillian Bradshaw, and her ancient world books! She manages to have such a compelling sense of an alien worldview, where slavery is taken for granted and women’s rights severely curtailed, and shows you how terrible this was without putting ahistorical attitudes in her characters’ voices. Plus she is one of my models for making her prose sound direct and breezy without coming across as too modern. My very very favorite is The Sand-Reckoner, which is about Archimedes (as a young man and total geek, rather than a naked old dude shouting “Eureka!”), his sister, and his slave. It made me, who hates math, honestly care about all the insane calculations he was making and that, my friends, is an Achievement. 

Young Adult/Children’s: A throwback, but 8-year-old me loved the works of Lloyd Alexander, especially the fantasy one-offs he would write (particularly The Iron Ring, set in fantasy ancient India, with what baby Avani remembers as a surprisingly sensitive discussion of caste and the mythological tropes of Hinduism). Also, the Westmark series is amazing: it starts off as a generic “restore the long lost heir to the throne” plot, and metamorphoses into an amazing exploration of duty, the pitfalls of monarchy, and the merits of socialism. Also highly recommended.

These are just a few to start off with, but I do love them all! I hope this helps, and thank you for this fabulous question that let me ramble about my favorite thing in the world!

[appetitecinema]

Note: This review may contain some spoilers. YOU’VE BEEN WARNED!!!

Hello everyone and welcome to Appetite Cinema! And for this Throwback Thursday, I proudly present: Nickelodeon in the 90’s.

Ahhh Nickelodeon… Good old Nickelodeon… What happened to you?!? It appears that growing up in the 90’s is one of those special privileges that a select few get to enjoy. I was blessed to be a 90’s kid (although sometimes I wished I had been born in an earlier era). Oh, it wasn’t always sunshine and lollipops. Teletubbies, Barney the Dinosaur, Furbies…those are the things I rather forget. But as far as Nickelodeon was concerned, that was probably one of the biggest highlights of the 90’s for me as a kid. Since its creation in the 70’s, Nickelodeon has given us a variety of shows and movies to enjoy. Some are not so great, and others not so bad. And for many of us, watching these shows/movies made us happy and filled us with awesome nostalgia. And for this week I’m looking at the very first Nickelodeon original movie, “Harriet the Spy”.

The movie was an adaptation of a children’s novel of the same name. Written by Louise Fitzhugh in 1964, the story focuses on 11 year old Harriet M. Welsch, who aspires to become a writer. Her nanny, Ole Golly, encourages her to observe other people, so she can write down her thoughts about what she sees. This gives Harriet the brilliant idea of creating a “spying route”, in which she begins to secretly observe the life of her neighbors, classmates, and friends. Everything she sees is written in her private journal. However things begin to go downhill for Harriet when her nanny ends up leaving. Her distant parents are of no comfort to her. To make matters worse, Harriet’s classmates and friends read her private journal, and are extremely hurt by the truthful, yet harsh words that were written. They decide to make Harriet’s life a living nightmare, constantly sabotaging and bullying her. However, Harriet ends up fighting back as well, becoming extremely vengeful. The chaos of the whole situation leads Harriet to make some important life decisions, two of theme centering around friendship and honesty.

It’s interesting that of all the movies that Nickelodeon could have made as their first movie, they decided to create something that had no connection to the shows they had done up until that point. I suppose in one way it was a good idea, since the movie is able to stand as it’s own story, and not be compared to the shows that were being aired at the time. Still, the movie isn’t entirely original, since the book it was based off had been around for years. However, I’m not going to talk about the book because I haven’t read it, and I would prefer to review this movie solely as a movie, and not measuring it’s worth by comparing it to its source material.

With that said, “Harriet the Spy” is quite a lovely gem of children nostalgia. While it’s very apparent that this movie is set during the 90’s, it not necessarily something that keeps me from enjoying the movie. Sometimes when a movie becomes dated, it actually adds to its charm and I think that’s the case with this movie. It’s nice to see a group of elementary children actually play real sports, and not entertaining themselves on video games or iPhones. And it’s nice to see a young girl use a typewriter to write down her thoughts, as oppose to a laptop or tablet. It a nice slice of the past, when technology hadn’t yet reach its peek, and children were still entertained by old forms of fun and games.

With that said, I know there are some who might find Rosie O'Donnell’s presence in the movie odd. This was during a time when O'Donnell would take a variety of roles in movies and television, children entertainment included. Despite whatever opinion one may have of her, O'Donnell’s performance is actually quite good. She does a terrific job playing Harriet’s wise but loving nanny, and her chemistry with Michelle Trachtenberg (Harriet) is delightful. In many ways, their relationship is the heart of the movie and the movie does a fine job of portraying that bond.

But seeing this is a movie aimed for children, what lessons and morals are found in “Harriet the Spy”? I remember seeing Siskel and Ebert’s review of the film and both men gave it two thumbs down. My understanding was that their main problem was how the message of the movie was handled. On one hand I understand the issues they felt, but I also believe they were being too harsh to the movie. Specifically, they didn’t like how Harriet’s parents weren’t the main source of guidance for her when she began to have problems. It was her nanny, Golly, that came to the rescue, and that portrayal of poor parenting seemed to upset them.

Yes, it’s upsetting that Harriet’s parents are not quite as attentive as they should be. But one of the things that makes “Harriet the Spy” stand out from other children’s movie is the slightly more honest portrayal of family life. While most parents are attentive and nurturing, it’s also true that other parents are absent and distant from their children. Harriet’s parents are wealthy and busy, and therefore have a nanny to take care of her. Since her nanny is the one that that’s always present, it’s natural that Golly and Harriet would share a strong bond that surpasses the one she has with her parents. To the movies credit, they do show her parents connecting with her more towards the end, as they make efforts to help her and even understand her better. So while the portrayal of parenting isn’t positive, it’s does try to show that effort is being made to improve upon the relationship between child and parent.

Another issue Siskel and Ebert brought up was the message of the movie and how it’s conveyed. This. I will admit, had me thinking for quite some time. In order to come to a conclusion, we need to ask ourselves this question that should be in the forefront of our mind when watching the movie: was Harriet wrong for writing the things she said in her journal?

The answer: no, she was not. However…failing to deal with her peers anger and legitimate hurt was where she went wrong. Harriet’s journal was a private journal, and thus it was ONLY for her eyes to see. What she wrote wasn’t meant to be mean, but simply a way for her to state things the way she saw them. Keep in mind she’s only 11 and still has a lot of learning to do. While her words can be harsh at times, her intentions aren’t meant to hurt anyone’s feelings. It’s only after the other kids lash out on her that she begins to go down hill. Although their torment on her was painful, her revenge on them is surprisingly even more malicious. And when her parents see how she’s gone completely overboard, it only leads Harriet to become even more aggravated and alone.

So what does Golly suggest Harriet do? First she must apologize, which is obvious of course. But the second step is where it gets tricky and where I tend to disagree a bit. Golly says she needs to lie. Now she does try to explain what she means, like using the example of “someone who makes you a meal that taste bad, but you tell them it’s good so they can feel happy” kind of thing. I don’t necessarily think that’s good advice, because lying is never a good thing, especially when you have to compromise what you believe (which is kind of the case for Harriet). However, since her friends have good reasons to feel hurt, it’s understandable why Harriet may have to humble herself a bit if it means finding piece with them again, which I think is what Golly (and the movie) is trying to get across. It’s not so much that Harriet has to lie, but more so finding other ways to say what she thinks, without hurting anyones feelings in the process. She also helps Harriet realize that she is gifted in a way that will make others feel unsure of her, but that she must always remain true herself. By doing so, Harriet can find the strength to do what’s right.

And thankfully she does. She apologizes to her friends and classmates, and is able to do so without having to lie. Once she’s given the chance for her voice to be heard, she’s able to honestly but kindly make amends with everyone. The ultimate message of the film is that honesty is important, but that it shouldn’t come in the expense of others. By the end, Harriet has learned to manage both friendship and honesty, while remaining true to who she is and holding on to what she loves most: writing.

That’s all for this weeks Throwback Thursday. Thanks for reading as always.

Until next time…

[itsdisneymydudes]

I’m Gonna Wreck It

Another movie I haven’t seen, another live blog! This week I’ll be checking out Wreck-It Ralph. Truth be told, idk why I haven’t seen this before: video game and arcade jokes? What’s not to love omg.

Oh my god, 8-bit Disney Animation logo with complimentary 8-bit music. It’s perfect.

Wait a minute...is Ralph really the bad guy if the bulldozer moved his stump first? I can kinda understand his aggression seeing as they hit first. He’s only responding...with fists...

Fastest way to get exposition is to have John C. Riley narrate over a video game lemme tell ya. And the premise makes a lot of sense. Ralph does his job. It just so happens that that job is to wreck everything. And get thrown off a roof. Into mud. Medal-less.

Lol @the-kid​-who-says-“This animation is so real.” I see you, Disney. I see you.

Whoa. Just whoa. The arcade time lapse is so full of old video game references, there is no way you could catch them all in one viewing. Damn, Disney really went all out with the royalties for this movie. Pac-man, Asteroids, Frogger, TMNT, this is beautiful.

And we’re still less than 3 minutes into this movie. Oh, this is gonna be good.

Aw, Ralph wants to love his job but hates it at the same time. Is this gonna be a mid-life crisis told through video games? Please say yes.

Lolololol this is like a modern version of Toy Story. All the video games come to life once the people leave. Oh and Street Fighter II? That could not have been easy to get in this movie (and they only use it for a quick joke about grabbing a drink after work, too. Now that’s dedication to making your world believable).

I’m loving this translation of choppy 8-bit video game motions into a 3D animated world. It’s a subtle touch, but one that makes everything more realistic imo.

Also, loving the meta-humor where Ralph literally wrecks everything he touches. Even the bushes fall over after he brushes them.

Aw, Ralph’s true motivations are coming through... :(

Lol a Bad-Anon meeting? Idk what’s better: the fact that it’s a play on Alcohol Anonymous or the fact that they used Anon from Internet slang.

Nope, I change my mind. The best part about this is how many video game baddies they have here. Bowser, Kano, Dr. Robotnik, Blinky the Ghost, I just can’t believe it.

Aw, the bad guys are really trying to explain to Ralph why being bad isn’t necessarily a bad thing. That’s nice.

Oh my god, Kano just ripped Zombie’s heart out. That’s hilarious. Fatality (except Zombie is already dead...).

Lol. Thanks, Satan.

I like how everyone freaks out when Ralph says he doesn’t want to be the bad guy anymore. Society has rules, and if Ralph is trying to break them in the slightest (”go Turbo”), then everyone loses their minds. Even for bad guys, you still gotta follow the rules.

Whoa. Blinky is right. Don’t try and change who you are to be better, accept who you are to be a better you. Damn, deep stuff.

AHHH THE BAD-ANON MEETING WAS IN BLINKY’S RESPAWN BOX FOR PAC-MAN. THAT’S ABSOLUTE GOLD.

Oh my god Game Central Station is magnificent. The gates are outlet faces, and there are so many video game characters there. This is amazing.

Lol “All aboard the Soul Train, outlet 12.” Nice throwback.

Oooo a “random security check” always pulling aside Ralph. Not-so-subtle discrimination allegory. I like it. Also, Lara Croft name-dropping is always a good touch.

Sonic is in this movie too??? Marvelous. Simply marvelous.

Holy crap, Q*bert is homeless because their game got unplugged??? Snake too??? Oh my god that’s right in the feels. Aw and Ralph gives them his cherry. That’s so sweet. Gah this is gonna be an emotional roller coaster of a movie.

Lolololol is that supposed to be Skrillex?

Ralph and Felix’s conversation is so awkward. That makes me sad :(

Ah, Ralph is already breaking stuff. Ah and Felix’s respawn animation. Too cute.

Two things: 1) why are the apartment people so effing rude. Were they raised in a bar? Jfc. 2) I’m loving how anti-social Ralph is. Yea, you tell em buddy. Stick it to the man.

As sad as Ralph wrecking the cake is, you gotta appreciate the pixelated cake-splatter everywhere.

Oh my gosh how did I not see this before?! Tapper is an old video game too! Golly gee, references are everywhere!!!

Super mushrooms and Metal Gear exclamation points in the lost-and-found! Brilliant!

Oh, I get it. Hero’s Duty is supposed to be a cross between Halo and Call of Duty. Modern games are in this movie too. Smashing.

Is that Jane Lynch???? Oh heck yes!

“First Person Shooter coming through.” Niceeeeeeee.

This dubstep-space-robot-bug-thingy-shooter sequence is FUCKING AWESOME. HOLY NUTS WHY CAN’T ALL DISNEY MOVIES BE LIKE THIS.

Even in this chaotic shooting game, “formation” and social constructs are paramount. Damn, society. You scary.

Ralph and the “old video games” calling out the “new video games” for being scary. Got em.

Ha. A giant blue beam to zap all the bugs with. Cute.

Subway product placement? Huh. Interesting.

Also, the jerk guys who are clearly way older than the marketed arcade demographic are total jerks. Realistic arcade representation though. Every arcade has em.

Oh snap. Now I know why “sticking to the program” is so important. If games don’t, then they can be shut down for good. That’s so dark, Disney.

Ah now I wanna learn Q*bert-ese. That sounds really fun.

Also, it’s funny to see how much the village people (pun intended) need Ralph now after they berated him for “wrecking everything.” Yea, karma bitch.

I like how smitten Felix is for high-definition characters. Lol innuendo.

Are the cybug eggs supposed to be a reference to the eggs from Aliens? If so, I approve.

Aw, Ralph just wants everyone’s approval. That’s so sad :( Poor Ralph.

The little cybug just jumped on Ralph’s face. Totally a reference to Aliens.

Hahahahaha. Sonic lost his rings!

Sugar Rush is a mix between Mario Kart and Candyland right? That’s sweet (yes, pun intended again).

Also, that’s a theme catchy song.

I can’t believe that’s Sarah Silverman!

Whoa was that a glitch...? Do they have those in this movie?

If cybugs are viruses, does that mean Hero’s Duty is like the Norton Antivirus of the arcade then? Lol that’d be a riveting game.

Pay-to-play for this racing competition seems like it guarantees the richest racers will always race…it’s almost like the top 1% of racers will always stay at the top…hey wait a minute, Disney…

I like how the coins dissolve in to 0’s and 1’s. It’s the little details that make this movie awesome.

Oh no, Ralph’s medal got dissolved…

So Vanellope is a glitch. Whoa.

Haha. The cops are donuts. Got em.

Is that Ralph or Shrek?

AH IS THIS SUPPOSED TO BE A REPRESENTATION OF POLICE BRUTALITY??? AH DISNEY I SEE YOU

Whoa, glitch discrimination. That’s some deep stuff yo.

THE OREOS ARE FROM THE WIZARD OF OZ I’M GONNA McFREAKIN’ LOSE IT

Children of the Candy Corn? There are so many references in this movie that I highly doubt younger audiences will recognize.

Lol. Fun-geon. Pun-geon. Aha, ok. I’m done-geon. Oh my god. It went full circle.

A Darth Vader breathing reference? What doesn’t this movie have???

Pixlexia? Is that a play on dyslexia?

Holy fuck, these racers are awful. They’re destroying Vanellope’s car just cuz she’s different? WTF.

Yay! Ralph to the rescue!

Haha. Ralph can break everything except a jawbreaker. Just like I remember them.

Oh snap. Nvm, he did.

Why would a creepy character like Turbo be the hero of a racing game? He sure doesn’t look like a hero…

Also, good exposition for the word “Turbo.”

Ahaha. Nesquik-sand. I love Nesquik. But I hate sand. It’s rough. And course. And it gets everywhere (lol, ok I’m done).

Aha Laffy Taffy that laugh. This movie is full of puns too? Oh I am in love.

Aaaaand insert obligatory Disney romance subplot here.

Lol. Gunshots are the fastest way to silence unwanted singing.

Oh my gosh. Candy-cybugs???

Is Vanellope calling Ralph “Knuckles” supposed to be a Sonic the Hedgehog reference? If so, I love it.

Lolololol did she just call him GLaDOS too??? Gold!!!

A game within a game. Game-ception? Nope, a mini-game!

Aw Vanellope and Ralph are bonding.

AW VANELLOPE LOVES THE CAR RALPH MADE FOR HER. THAT’S SO FUCKING PRECIOUS.

I get the vibe I’m not supposed to like King Candy, but his puns save me. Spiritually, ethically, psychologically. Everything.

Ahhhhh the ol’ Mentos and Diet Coke trick. Good one.

Whoa. The parallels between Vanellope and Ralph are striking, sure. But the fact that she can’t even leave her game because she’s a glitch? That’s hard stuff. At least Ralph can go where he pleases. Damn, Disney.

Lol, Vanellope learning to drive is exactly how I was in driver’s ed. “What do these pedals on the floor do?”

Vanellope has a chance to win if she can “get that glitch under control?” That totally undermines the entire message of the movie thus far! What the heck!

AAAAAAAHHHHH THE UP-UP-DOWN-DOWN-LEFT-RIGHT-LEFT-RIGHT-B-A-START CHEAT CODE!!!!!! YES!!!!!!!!

Aw, even Vanellope’s code is alienated from the rest of the game…

Lol, come on Felix. Put a trigger warning on before you say “Dynamite gal.”

HOLY FUCK VANELLOPE WILL DIE IF SHE WINS THE RACE. OH MY GOD KING CANDY’S LOGIC MAKES SENSE BUT HOLY FUCK THAT’S AWFUL. JESUS DISNEY WHY DO YOU HAVE TO DO THIS TO ME.

AAAAHHH VANELLOPE MADE RALPH A MEDAL OH MY GOD THIS IS TOO MUCH

AAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHH RALPH NO NOT THE CAR OH MY FUCKING GOD NO NO NO NO NO

This movie is really sending mixed signals about being bad. Is it good to be bad? Is it bad to be bad? Are bad guys just alone no matter which way they try to be?

Waaaaaiiiit a minute. Why is Vanellope on the side of the arcade game if she’s a glitch? Game makers wouldn’t do that…what’s going on…

Lol, I literally just thought of that Ralph. No fair.

Haha. Candy-coated Heart of Darkness. The horror. The horror.

Jesus, eating Sour Bill is like dunking him in acid. Ralph is twisted, wow oh wow.

Whoa. Jeez how omnipotent is King Candy? He forcibly made Vanellope a glitch, then locked up everyone’s memories of her? Whoa.

The game will reset if Vanellope crosses the finish line? Hm….

Also, nice “stick around” pun, Ralph.

Lol. Felix making the bars stronger is great.

So is Ralph returning to being bad…by doing something good? Again, what is this movie trying to say! Be good or be bad??? Be bad with good intentions??? Jeez, I’ve never had such an identity crisis over a movie before!

Haha. The assorted fans with nuts are the Cameron Crazies. Nice touch.

Ooooooo I love the camera pan-around for the racecars! Just like in Mario Kart!

Ah someone even spun out before the start! Didn’t get the timing right, eh?

Now that’s what I call pod-racing!

Ayyy nice. Vanellope’s glitch moved her ahead of those Mean-Girl-esque candy racers!

Damn, Vanellope is 2 fast 2 furious for King Candy (with a little Tokyo Drift thrown in there for good measure).

Oh my god. It all makes sense now. King Candy is Turbo. He passed his glitch on to Vanellope so she’d be the outcast and not him. But Vanellope inadvertently passed it back to him and exposed him. Whoa.

Oh nice, another literary reference. On the “Come back soon” sign, it says “Parting is such sweet sorrow…” from Romeo and Juliet. Nice one (and a good pun too).

Oh god, Vanellope still can’t leave the game.

No no no she can’t die. No no no don’t do it, Disney.

Oh I see. Ralph is using his bad wrecking powers for good. Ohhhhhh.

Ohhhh snap. Now Turbo is game-hopping virus. Shit.

OH NO. NO NO NO. IS RALPH GONNA DIE???

Oh. He didn’t. Good.

Wait, is Vanellope getting a dress? Aw come on, Disney. I thought we were done with gender stereotyping.

Whoa, what??? Princess Vanellope??? Yo way to go!!!

Yea, Vanellope, yea! Execute those suckers! Fuck em up!!!

Aw, she was just kidding. Darn it.

Lol, constitutional democracy? President Vanellope? Yea, I’d vote for her.

Jesus, even with a happy ending, Disney has to play with my heart. Why does Ralph have to say goodbye. Why why why.

Aw a nice sweet happy ending where everybody wins. Good ol’ Disney.

HOLY CRAP RALPH CAN SEE VANELLOPE RACING WHEN HE GETS THROWN OFF THE BUILDING THAT IS SO FREAKING CUTE OH MY GOSH

AHHHHH WHAT A PERFECT ENDING. WHAT A PERFECT LAST LINE. AHHHHH THIS MOVIE IS SO PERFECT. I CAN’T HANDLE THIS RIGHT NOW GAAAAAHHHHHH

OH MY GOODNESS JUST WHEN I THOUGHT THIS MOVIE COULDN’T GET ANY BETTER. THE PAC-MAN ENDGAME GLITCH IS AT THE END OF THE CREDITS DURING THE DISNEY LOGO. HOW PERFECT IS THAT!?!?!? AHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!

This movie is beautiful. Just simply beautiful.

[bookreadalongs]

Flat Out Celeste

Tuesday, June 26th

1:43 PM with these Ivy League dreams, bet Celeste will end up in Cali with Justin. Watch her go into liberal arts instead of science. She’s clearly great at it all. Matt has science down to pat. Whoever Justin is. Is Barton another made up school?

Oh interesting. He’s the recruiter… 1:44

Oh. He was so good at teaching Julie…wow, 5 years ago? He’s surely going to follow his mother and become a professor. What if he teaches at an ivy too? I’d expect nothing else. It would be funny if he went to Celestes college but she’s def going to California. 13:48

What the heck happened in these 5 years? I mean, they had sex. Know that. Of course they’re getting back together. Matt is 26 now. He needs to act like it. Also, what’s with this author and a 2 year age difference? 13:51

Hahaha “then he stumbled and I did not catch him” that does pretty much sum it up, huh? 16:23

Oh I hope he fumbled with the door like Julie! 16:41

I appreciate Celeste. She turned down friendship, but she had to initiate them later. Relatable. Not even initiate, just be ready to not push them away. 16:54

Remember when Celeste did not like Julies alliterative update for Finn? 17:14

Is there always going to be lifesavers in these books? I guess…love is a lifesaver. From being sad or insecure or just a little down in the dumps. It’s just very reminiscent of Flat Out Love. 17:17

Subtle adding that Dallas thinks Celeste dresses nicely. Apparently her mother does as well. Interesting. 17:18

As you wish? She doesn’t love him yet! 17:20

Hahaha throw back to when Celeste began being sassy. I could see a shrug smile hair flip as she goes “or midnight”! 17:34

We get it. It’s not Julie. There’s no “fixing” complex here. 17:36 he’s right though. You fix yourself

Got it. He’s poor but will pay for her. Will that be a point in the book? Probably. The fact that he mentioned he had this job for extra money, maybe. 17:43

Do they get mad at each other then return to the tree to rekindle the love? That’s only one month of love…maybe they take it and hide it. 20:48

Justin is a wordsmith too? How Matt like. 21:05

Looks like Matt will see Julie in this impromptu Cali trip. Was he going to propose??? Saved up. 21:57

Please tell me the mysterious things she got were condoms because she went into Mats room accidentally and she’s going to be so confused and everyone will be shook! Maybe that’s a little far fetched. 21:58

Another phobia and display of love theough technology? So reminiscent of FOL 22:00

How amazing would it be if Julie was in the room with Matt? 10:15

HAHAHAHAHA the theee of us. Justin, you, and me. A trio. Just a small group. 10:19 of two

Ya think he photoshopped pictures of Celeste and himself so they’re eating Indian food together in the pictures? Tb to FOL 22:24

So, like, someone is either slipping down this cliff or hooking up on that beach, right? 22:30

Oh will we get into his past romances? 22:32

Justin predicting Celeste shutting people down like she did in the beginning of the book. 22:34 he gets her

Don’t tell me…is Helvética in comic sans? I wonder if Julie got that for him. 22:43

Haha I can imagine Matt defensively telling her she's being more than a little high strung 22:45HAHAHA Celeste forcing them to take two cars and Matt being like wtf okay ms thing 22:47woah throw back to when Celeste got Julie to come to Flat Finns going away party and Matt and Julie got together. What a matchmaker. She stayed resilient and tenacious. Wow Flat Finn...those were the days. That's so fricken creepy 22:48omg "I assumed you'd be here with Roger or Erin" throwback to when she met with Celeste every Sunday and requested Matt never accompany them. Wowza how the circle has...turned...come full circle 22:51 Omg Julie shut the fuck up. Celeste asked y'all not to fight anymore...ya know. 5 years ago. Rip. Rip Finn 22:55 She's like her mom in that car. Is her like imminent almost death going to being Julie and Matt back together? Because I'm a little tired of that story line. 22:58 Jesus fricken ---I'm tired clearly. The swears come out. Is she suicidal? Now she's going to hurt Justin? Golly - so many swears in my mind. Ahh 23:01 ouch imminent I forgot my vocabulary shrinks too She sounds possessed and scary and I'm imagining her very robotic and stiff intonation wise. It's creepy. 23:04 She's so fricken mortified of Flat Finn. It just takes her back to her weakest moments. She was lying about a lot. It makes sense Matt wanted to stay near her. That's a big part of who he is and Julie knows that. Something else fizzled. I thought it was going to go like she was pregnant then and he didn't want to keep it or something I knew wasn't going to happen. 23:06 FRICK now she's actually talking in monotone like a possessed person? Freaky...23:06 Wow, Justin called it retroactively as well as post actively. If that's a thing. She has an issue acknowledging people actually like her... 23:09 A job interview? In California, by chance? 23:19 I can't believe matt just said passing over conversation with my intellect...that's so funny. You want to hate it, but it's so funny. Because he's kidding. I see. I see what this books message is. People will love you even if you're unlovable and try to express that. So, might as well be lovable if you're trying to protect them from yourself. I needed that when I was 18. And 16. And now. And all the time before. 23:15 Yep yep. I knew those notes were going to be game changing. 23:18 Hinges? Like...Flat Finn? 23:23 It's true. Matt is the only one with her. Honestly, you can say she didn't need him, but she just blew up. It's not unfair for him to fear that if he left not unlike Finn...right? 23:29 I appreciate how Matt also thinks something is wrong with him. This is a screwed up group of people. Julie is the only normal one and she is kind of pompous and self absorbed. It works for her though 23:31 oh haha I thought Celeste proudly saying "then you clean it up" was referring to her demanding Matt to clean up the confetti Finn 23:33 ahhh when it said he rocked back and forth my delirious mind picture him like a penguin with shoulders raised grinning and tittering. 23:35 like FOL I think we need to run a Béchamel, obviously I know it's not a French sauce, but like Betchel maybe? Test on it. I swear, the only girl is a side friend who only talks about the love interest or her own love interest 23:38 Oh my heart. The Finn emails - best part of it as well as the banter between Julie and Matt 23:46 it was a better book than this one. Obvious twist was supposed to be obvious. You had to know it for some of the jokes. It's good to be obvious to everyone but the narrator even though it's third person. It just would've worked better in first person. She's obvious about things, but it feels good. There's only one puzzle piece you need to put in because she does the rest and lets you say you finished the puzzle. 23:47 The messaging session that may have left her head, but never her heart. It was a good book. I want to amp it up to 5 on good reads. It's so solid halfway through, I feel. I can't remember the first half though. Blah. Blah school. Blah blah I look good blah blah celeste needs to be changed. 23:50 Matt in full suit and tie my heart. Author is good at story tellingly and what to tell and what not to. It's true. It's like only the important parts were kept, but you feel like life between them. The thought, the nerves, the doubts. 23:53 all this "so they did" "so She does" like it's reminiscent of Point of Retreat. It was cute when it was I dos then the so he did. Or whatever. This is cute. It's a 4 if FOL is 4.5 23:55 That fucking shirt. He knew. He saved it. That fucking shirt. Like his sky diving shirt. Wow swear words are fun to think and say in your head. I guess that's thinking. 23:57 it's like weird they haven't talked in two years, right? Regardless of still being in love. People change in two years. People change in like a month. 23:58 you can even marry Harry...nowadays. Anyway, cute, but when have either of them quoted anyone? Also, tbh thought it'd be that one celestial quote. I like this more though. 00:01 shit I was supposed to go to bed when I went in bed like two and a half hours ago. Weird ending. Not gonna lie. Liked FOL just in general a lot better. A lot less choppy. Granted, less character growth, but better development of different characters. Better love story. Better tension. This had a good message though. I like it and am glad I read it. I imagine it has a higher rating on GR because the people who read FOL and loved it continued. Inherent bias. It was sweet. FOL was better. End of story. Better ending. Have I said these things already? I'm reading too much again. 5 books 4 days. All over 300 pages. Not impossible just not wise, I'd say. You better believe I'm reading another tomorrow. I love it. It helps me escape. I shouldn't escape so much. I should learn how to sleep. I appreciate reading and remembering details because everything else means so much more if you see the Easter eggs. That's why I try to read people and remember anything they say. I can start to understand them and living is just that much better. 00:14 this is going to look so ugly formatting wise

[alicedaydreams]

Reminiscin’, this-n-thattin’ havin’ such a good time, Oo-de-lally, oo-de-lally, golly, what a day! #fbf to this Disney classic! So who else has a crush on this literal 🦊? 🏹🎯💰💚 . . It’s finally Friday after the longest week ever! Cheers & if you love Robin Hood, don’t sleep on grabbing @jordandenenyc’s Shirt of the Month! ⭐️code: ROAM25 for 25% off your @jordandenenyc order!⭐️ . . . #jordandene #geekchic #geekstyle #geekfashion #disneystyle #disneylove #robinhood #liveincolor #disnerd #disneyfashion #blackmilkclothing #bmfallingtoasties #targetstyle #throwback #fandomfashion #brandambassador #shopsmall #womanowned #ootd #friyay #tgif

[mellymancill-blog]

Throwback Thursday 🤓 *** Ahhh, the peer support specialist chapter of my life. **

One of the most humbling, life changing experiences of my being.

Stepping through the door with a badge key card around my neck in the facility I, myself, went to in 2012 when I reached my own rock bottom, was one of those moments when I felt as though I had accomplished another thing off my bucket list… when I discharged from detox after completion of the program at the center, I made a call to who was picking me up from detox to have a pack of Marlboro lights and a Mountain Dew with them or don’t bother picking me up.. (I just spent a week sucking on frosted mini wheats because we couldn’t have sugar,’coming down and drying out off of meth, and wishing those nicotine patches worked like a good drag or three of a Marlboro)… when they got there to pick me up, as I was walking out the door, I said to myself: “I’m gonna work here one day…” —It took me two years to get a position at the clinic but by golly, it was worth every day I waited to get it.. with the offer to become a certified peer support specialist and be able to work as a colleague with the wonderful women who helped me build a rock solid foundation of recovery with.. the gals who I started out with in the clinical field helped to educate me on so many things from diagnoses to not getting emotionally involved in cases; clinical detachment, they called it… I am forever grateful to that wonderful group of women who I started my professional career with.

Fast forward to when I went back to work for the agency after a 6 month break following a total meltdown from the heaviness of carrying other people’s trauma.. seeing their hurts, heartbreaks, their desire to be clean but not being able to stop chasing that high… raw emotion that just overloaded me..

Now, don’t get me wrong, I loved having my very own caseload of people like me to get to help with their own journey, whether it was mental health struggles or addiction issues, or both, but what was to come in my role as a peer support specialist would be what ignited my passion.

I took a position at the detox clinic as a peer on the mobile crisis response team.. THE peer. The only peer working side by side with clinicians, doctors, nurses, psychologists and psychiatrists… it was there that I learned so much from a brilliant team of colleagues..we worked together to help people at their rock bottom.. we sat with people while they shared their deepest fears, struggles, moments that clearly triggered trauma from their childhood or even present.. for me, being able a part of a team who got to help these people level out and get them connected to the help they needed was where my passion ignited.

To be able to tell these people that I’m one of them too, just in long term recovery, was the common denominator that bound us together. I always promised my “clients” that I would walk every step of the way with them as long as they put in the work, too. This would be one of the most rewarding experiences I’ve known.

Eventually, things got too heavy again… there were those heartaches, the longing to want to help people with everything inside you… Having to tell family members that we can’t help them because their loved one is over 18 and has to reach out to us for help in order to get them started in the program. Seeing people fall through the cracks because of insurance, or backing out before time to enter treatment… the ones you had to listen to a call of a person so tortured that they’re not able to even communicate with you hardly due to them crying and managing to utter “help me”..

I chose to step out of that world and began to help people on my own terms. That was for my I own mental health, well being and was a huge utilization of self care which was always one of my weaknesses..

Just know, I will ALWAYS advocate for the sick and suffering. I will ALWAYS fight to break the stigma. And I will ALWAYS be one of the people who will listen if someone ever needs an ear. This blog entry will be the first of many here on tumblr. I will share my experience, strength and hope with you all in hopes that someone out there may need to hear something that has been laid on my heart to share and may it give them the push they need to start their own journey of recovery. ❤️ #breakthestigma #peersupport #wedorecover

[hottytoddynews]

NYC Skyline, Photo by Steven Gagliano

As any hunter knows, you have to blend-in to bag game. In NYC, the purpose of blending in is to avoid being the game. The upcoming Ole Miss Club of New York’s Summer Social at the Harvard Club on June 9th is a good excuse to give ya’ll my top 10 rules for surviving the City.  Never say “New York City”, it’s just “The City.”

1. The greeting protocol is to blurt out the phrase, “How are you doing?”, spoken as,  “Howyadoin.”  New Yorkers do not actually want to know “How you are doing”, and would be taken aback if you told them. In linguistics, the phrase “Howyadoin” is called a phatic expression, whose function is to perform a social task, as opposed to seeking information. Here’s some other interesting phatic expressions around the world: Republic of Georgia:”Let you win”, Mauritania: “On you no evil”, and Mauritius:”Speak!”

2. On the other end of phatic greetings is the NYC practice of cat-calling, also known as “hollers.”  There is no way to avoid it. New York City is considering the establishment of “no catcall” zones. My best advice is to pretend you didn’t hear the catcall. If they persist, ask them to repeat it -the more they have to repeat, the sillier they sound. Same advice for ladies. Avoid construction sites, sporting events, and Restaurant Week.

3. Don’t be concerned that you don’t understand anyone, they don’t understand you either. However, communication is fairly simple. If you find yourself lost in the conversation, just say, “Fuggedaboudit”, “Not for nuttin’” or “Go kill yourself.” These phrases can mean, “yeah, you’re right,” “wow!”, “that’s terrible,” “that’s awesome”, “medium rare”, “Boston sucks” or a number of other things known only to wise-guys.

4. Don’t stare, and no matter what, pretend you have seen it all. Always look vaguely angry and dangerous. Happy people are tourists, they stand out as a potential target.  Do not smile or look into anyone’s eyes. It’s preserved as aggression or weakness. Confidence is key. If a pigeon poops on your shoulder, it was all part of the plan.

5. Prepare in advance of the metro card turnstile by having the card ready to swipe. Practice if needed. And never, ever, get into an empty subway car when the other cars are crowded. 

6. Leave the Lilly at home ladies. You may wear any color you like as long as it’s black. Easy on make-up, hairspray, and deodorant. Remember that less is more. Also, the wrong footwear will give you away. Wear flats or throwback converse hightops.

7. Always walk on the right side of the sidewalk at a brisk pace – walk especially brisk if you DON”T KNOW where you’re going. Don’t look up at the buildings. Even if King Kong is climbing the Empire State, don’t look up. If you spot a celebrity, ignore them.

8. Get ready to be stereotyped. English are asked if they know the Queen. Frenchmen are greeted with a hearty “sacre bleu!” (an archaic saying equivalent to “Golly”), and Southerners get bombarded with Jeff Foxworthy-isms. Yes, I have heard them all. Thank you Jeff.

9. Get used to hearing the “F-bomb.” Try not to take offense. Most New Yorkers just use it as an adjective. “It’s f—-ing cold”, “It’s f—-ing hot”, “It’s f—-ing gorgeous outside”, “What the “F” you looking at?”, etc.

10. If you tell a New Yorker you’re from Oxford, don’t be surprised if they ask if you know their friend from Dallas, Charlotte, Charleston or any city or state vaguely Southern. I suppose New Yorkers figure we all know each other.

And since you gotta eat, try these two classics and the evitable pizza.

The Palm, 837 2nd Ave. Since its establishment in 1926, Though the Palm has expanded with restaurants across the US, this Palm is the first and the walls are covered caricatures of celebrities, frequent guests and favorite cartoon characters from the “Mad Men” era.

Grand Central Oyster Bar, 89 E 42nd St, NYC. The Grand Central Oyster Bar is a central feature of Grand Central Station, and has been serving fine seafood from around the world since 1913.

Pizza. What would NYC be without it? Pizza is on every top-10 list of New York things and will be a main topic of discussion. Here’s a cheat sheet.

The sacred words for pizza:

Photo Courtesy: commons.wikimedia.org

· Slice – single slice of cheese pizza from a street vendor – always folded while eaten.

· Pie – refers to a whole pizza.

· Rays – is the generic term for pizza, like “coke “ for a carbonated beverage.

· Calzone and Stromboli is pizza in folded form, like a giant turnover. The difference between the two? One is rectangular and one is half-moon shaped. I forget which is which and it doesn’t matter.

About 1/3 of the restaurants in NYC serve Pizza. You can’t sling a dead cat without hitting a world famous Rays. Which of the Rays is the original?

· Famous Ray’s

· Famous Original Ray’s

· Original Ray’s

· Ray Bari’s

· Real Ray’s

· One and Only Famous Ray’s

· World Famous Ray’s

It’s a trick question: the simply named “Ray’s Pizza” closed in 2011. When asked about the secret to making good pizza, the owner of Rays Pizza said, “What do you mean? You buy top-grade flour and mozzarella. What else?”

Fuggedaboudit!

Tim Heaton is a HottyToddy.com contributor and can be reached at tim.h.heaton@gmail.com. His new book, “Bless Your Heart, You Freakin’ Idiot: Southern Sayings Translated” is available on Amazon as well as “Momma n’ Em Said: The Treasury of Southern Sayings.”

Follow HottyToddy.com on Instagram, Twitter and Snapchat @hottytoddynews. Like its Facebook page: If You Love Oxford and Ole Miss…

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NYC Skyline, Photo by Steven Gagliano

As any hunter knows, you have to blend-in to bag game. In NYC, the purpose of blending in is to avoid being the game. The upcoming Ole Miss Club of New York’s Summer Social at the Harvard Club on June 9th is a good excuse to give ya’ll my top 10 rules for surviving the City.  Never say “New York City”, it’s just “The City.”

1. The greeting protocol is to blurt out the phrase, “How are you doing?”, spoken as,  “Howyadoin.”  New Yorkers do not actually want to know “How you are doing”, and would be taken aback if you told them. In linguistics, the phrase “Howyadoin” is called a phatic expression, whose function is to perform a social task, as opposed to seeking information. Here’s some other interesting phatic expressions around the world: Republic of Georgia:”Let you win”, Mauritania: “On you no evil”, and Mauritius:”Speak!”

2. On the other end of phatic greetings is the NYC practice of cat-calling, also known as “hollers.”  There is no way to avoid it. New York City is considering the establishment of “no catcall” zones. My best advice is to pretend you didn’t hear the catcall. If they persist, ask them to repeat it -the more they have to repeat, the sillier they sound. Same advice for ladies. Avoid construction sites, sporting events, and Restaurant Week.

3. Don’t be concerned that you don’t understand anyone, they don’t understand you either. However, communication is fairly simple. If you find yourself lost in the conversation, just say, “Fuggedaboudit”, “Not for nuttin’” or “Go kill yourself.” These phrases can mean, “yeah, you’re right,” “wow!”, “that’s terrible,” “that’s awesome”, “medium rare”, “Boston sucks” or a number of other things known only to wise-guys.

4. Don’t stare, and no matter what, pretend you have seen it all. Always look vaguely angry and dangerous. Happy people are tourists, they stand out as a potential target.  Do not smile or look into anyone’s eyes. It’s preserved as aggression or weakness. Confidence is key. If a pigeon poops on your shoulder, it was all part of the plan.

5. Prepare in advance of the metro card turnstile by having the card ready to swipe. Practice if needed. And never, ever, get into an empty subway car when the other cars are crowded. 

6. Leave the Lilly at home ladies. You may wear any color you like as long as it’s black. Easy on make-up, hairspray, and deodorant. Remember that less is more. Also, the wrong footwear will give you away. Wear flats or throwback converse hightops.

7. Always walk on the right side of the sidewalk at a brisk pace – walk especially brisk if you DON”T KNOW where you’re going. Don’t look up at the buildings. Even if King Kong is climbing the Empire State, don’t look up. If you spot a celebrity, ignore them.

8. Get ready to be stereotyped. English are asked if they know the Queen. Frenchmen are greeted with a hearty “sacre bleu!” (an archaic saying equivalent to “Golly”), and Southerners get bombarded with Jeff Foxworthy-isms. Yes, I have heard them all. Thank you Jeff.

9. Get used to hearing the “F-bomb.” Try not to take offense. Most New Yorkers just use it as an adjective. “It’s f—-ing cold”, “It’s f—-ing hot”, “It’s f—-ing gorgeous outside”, “What the “F” you looking at?”, etc.

10. If you tell a New Yorker you’re from Oxford, don’t be surprised if they ask if you know their friend from Dallas, Charlotte, Charleston or any city or state vaguely Southern. I suppose New Yorkers figure we all know each other.

And since you gotta eat, try these two classics and the evitable pizza.

The Palm, 837 2nd Ave. Since its establishment in 1926, Though the Palm has expanded with restaurants across the US, this Palm is the first and the walls are covered caricatures of celebrities, frequent guests and favorite cartoon characters from the “Mad Men” era.

Grand Central Oyster Bar, 89 E 42nd St, NYC. The Grand Central Oyster Bar is a central feature of Grand Central Station, and has been serving fine seafood from around the world since 1913.

Pizza. What would NYC be without it? Pizza is on every top-10 list of New York things and will be a main topic of discussion. Here’s a cheat sheet.

The sacred words for pizza:

Photo Courtesy: commons.wikimedia.org

· Slice – single slice of cheese pizza from a street vendor – always folded while eaten.

· Pie – refers to a whole pizza.

· Rays – is the generic term for pizza, like “coke “ for a carbonated beverage.

· Calzone and Stromboli is pizza in folded form, like a giant turnover. The difference between the two? One is rectangular and one is half-moon shaped. I forget which is which and it doesn’t matter.

About 1/3 of the restaurants in NYC serve Pizza. You can’t sling a dead cat without hitting a world famous Rays. Which of the Rays is the original?

· Famous Ray’s

· Famous Original Ray’s

· Original Ray’s

· Ray Bari’s

· Real Ray’s

· One and Only Famous Ray’s

· World Famous Ray’s

It’s a trick question: the simply named “Ray’s Pizza” closed in 2011. When asked about the secret to making good pizza, the owner of Rays Pizza said, “What do you mean? You buy top-grade flour and mozzarella. What else?”

Fuggedaboudit!

Tim Heaton is a HottyToddy.com contributor and can be reached at tim.h.heaton@gmail.com. His new book, “Bless Your Heart, You Freakin’ Idiot: Southern Sayings Translated” is available on Amazon as well as “Momma n’ Em Said: The Treasury of Southern Sayings.”

Follow HottyToddy.com on Instagram, Twitter and Snapchat @hottytoddynews. Like its Facebook page: If You Love Oxford and Ole Miss…

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