#well. theres the tiny green spot you can barely call a park by my friends apartment i guess. i could go there to read for a bit

[sol-flo]

why is it that the first 100ml of a milkshake are nice and the remainder is simply gruelling to drink

[themagicaltunaa]

Answer all the questions

well i have nothing to do so sure

1. What have you eaten today? 

some toast for breakfast, leftovers for lunch, and some cereal for dinner

2. Who was your last kiss with? Was it pleasant?

never kissed anyone, don't really care about that

3. What color shoes did you last wear?

light grey sneakers

4. Who has made you laugh the hardest in the last week?

Jeremy did, when I was watching his Alien Isolation stream on monday

5. What is your favorite scent?

I love the smell freshly baked goods

6. What is your favorite season? Why?

I love fall. I just love the aesthetic of the season, and my favorite holiday is during fall. I would love to experience it one day

7. Can you do a handstand or cartwheel?

lol nope. I was barely able to do it as a kid. If I tried now i’m pretty sure i’ll break something.

8. What color are your nails?

the regular pink color? I don’t paint my nails

9. If you had to get a tattoo on your face to save your life, what would it be?

aw geez, uhhh idk maybe like a tiny star or something

10. What is something you find romantic?

i dont know romantic things 

11. Are you happy?

eh

12. Is there anything in particular making you happy or sad?

no not really

13. Dogs or Cats?

cats. i like dogs too, but sometimes they’re too much to deal with. i’m more comfortable being with cats

15. Which do you prefer:a museum, a night club, the forest or a library?

museum

15. What is your style?

my style is “im trying”

16. If you could be doing anything you like right now, what would it be?

stay up all night to catch up on videos

17. Are you in a relationship or single?

single babeyyyy

18. What makes you attracted to the person you like right now?

nothing, because im not attracted to anyone

19. If you could replace your partner/best friend with a celebrity of your choice, would you? Who with?

i dont like celebrities

20. Are you holding on to something you need to let go of? If so then what?

i’m pretty sure i’m holding on to a lot of stuff, but I can’t seem to remember anything specific. if this question means metaphorically, the answer still works

21. How did you celebrate last Halloween?

I went to a drive thru haunted house with my 2 friends, and after we got some taco bell and went to the beach to eat our food. we sat there for like 10 minutes before it started to rain on us

22. Have you recently made any big decisions?

nope. I try not to in general , I hate having to make any sort of big decision because I starting stressing 

23. Were you ever in a school play?

I’ve always had stage fright so no

24. What movie would you use to describe your life?

uhhhh, I dont watch enough movies to pick one

25. Is there something you have dreamed of doing for a long time? Why haven’t you done it? 

oh there’s plenty of things that I've dreamed of doing, but I just can’t do it because of anxiety 

26. Complete this sentence, “I wish I had someone with whom I could share…”

I dont like sharing

27. What are two things that irritate you about the same sex?

uhhh idk? maybe the whole makeup culture thing? but it’s not like it irritates me I just don’t get it. I can’t really think of a second thing

28. What are two things that irritate you about the opposite sex?

too much to list

29. What is the best thing that has happened to you this week?

fuck if i know

30. What is something that makes you sad when you think about it?

can’t think of anything rn

31. How long was your longest relationship?

never been in one

32. Have you ever been in love?

pretty sure I have not

33. Are you currently in love?

nope

34. Why did your last relationship end?

see question 31

35. What jewelry are you wearing right now, and where did you get it?

not wearing any atm. actually, I just don’t wear jewelry in general

36. When was the last time you cried and why?

I think it was last week? I don’t remember why, it was probably something stupid

37. Name someone pretty.

the anon that sent me this ask

38. What did you receive last Valentines Day?

oh! I got a few gifts from my bestie :)

39. Do you get jealous easily?

no

40. Have you ever been cheated on?

no

41. Do you trust your partner/best friend?

sure

42. Ever had detention?

no because I was a good bean in school

43. Would you rather live in the countryside or the city?

city. the countryside sounds nice, but just the thought of being out in the middle of nowhere especially at night makes me nervous 

44. What do people call you?

by my name

45. What was the last book you read?

I do not remember. It’s been years since I’ve read a book

46. How big of a nerd/dork are you?

uhhh idk

47. What kind of music do you listen to?

anything that catches my fancy. I don’t really stick to one kind of genre

48. How tall are you?

my doctor said I’m allowed to say i’m 5′2

49. Do you like kids?

they’re alright. I can handle be around them for a bit, but I would never want to have any 

50. Favorite fruits?

watermelon, starfruit, and tangerines

51. Do you wear jeans or sweats more?

jeans

52. What’s your earliest memory?

I was like 3-4, and I was at disney world with my family. I remember seeing a stage show of Bear in the Big Blue house, and I remember walking around ToonTown when it still existed

53. Ever had a poem or song written about you or to you?

i hope not

54. Do you prefer to be behind the camera or in front of it?

behind it

55. Do you have a collection of anything?

I used to collect seashells as a kid and I still have some of the collection somewhere in my closet. I wanna start a new collection of something but idk what

56. Do you save money or spend it?

i try to save it

57. What would your dream house be like?

something cozy and not too big, with a cat or 2

58. What top 5 things make you the angriest?

its 11pm at the time of answering this, i really can’t think of anything to fill a list rn

59. What top 5 things always brings a smile to your face?

see the previous question

60. You are walking down the street on your way to work. There is a dog drowning in the canal on the side of the street. Your boss has told you if you are late one more time you get fired. What do you do?

save the dog. i hate my job anyways so I don’t care

61. 72: You are at the doctor’s office and she has just informed you that you have approximately one month to live. a) Do you tell anyone/everyone you are going to die? b) What do you do with your remaining days? c) Would you be afraid?

I would definitely tell my closest friends, and some of my family members, probably my mom’s side of the family. If I had the money to, I would like to travel to some places that i’ve always wanted to go to. I would have a month to accept that i’m gonna die so i think i would be fine. i’d rather get plenty of time to know i’m dying rather than like last minute. this has been a topic that i’ve been thinking of for a while now, not because I’m like thinking about death or anything, I just need something to kill time with at work

62. Give me the first thing that comes to mind when you hear the word; heart.

a heart?

63. You just got a free plane ticket to anywhere. You have to depart right now. Where are you gonna go?

aw cmon, I can’t just think of stuff like that on the spot. I don’t even know where I would want to go

64. Do you like the beach?

It’s nice, especially in the early morning when everything is still calm and the beach isn’t packed with people yet

65. Ever sleep on the couch or a bed with someone special?

no? wtf does someone special mean?

66. Do you have a middle name? If so what is it!

Doesn’t everyone have a middle name? But yeah i do and i hate it so im not saying anything

67. Do you talk to yourself?

in my head all the time

68. Describe your hair.

brown, curly, very long because I haven’t cut it in almost a year, it’s very annoying

69. What is the meaning of life.

I wish i knew

70. What is your ideal partner like?

no one

71. Do you want to get married?

no

72. Do you want to have kids?

 ew no

73. Like or dislike your family?

 they’re bearable

74. Are you Chunky or Slim?

I’m more than chunky, i’m just straight up fat

75. Would you consider yourself smart?

lol no. I’m an absolute dumbass

76. What would you change about your life?

everything if i could

77. Religious or Not?

no not really

78. You’re drunk and yelling at hot guys/girls out of your car window, you’re with?

I don’t drink so this would never happen

79. You’re locked in a room with the last person you kissed, is that a problem?

it sure isnt because no one is there

80. Does anyone regularly (other than family) tell you they love you?

uhhhh no. I don’t really care tbh

81. If the person you wish to be with were with you, what would you be doing right now?

idk

82. So, the last person you kissed just happens to arrive at your door at 3AM; do you let them in?

i’m not opening the door because no one is there

83. Do you like when people play with your hair?

ehh not really. It’ll just make it frizzy

84. Do you like bubble baths?

no

85. Have you ever been pulled over by a cop?

I need to drive in order for that to happen

86. Have you ever danced in the rain?

no. its not fun getting soaked in the rain

87. Do you trust anyone with your life?

not really? 

88. What was your first thought when you woke up this morning?

why does god allow suffering

89. If money wasn’t an issue, what top 10 places would you travel to? (You get to stay at each place for a week)

1.greece

2. peru

3.disney world only because I have not been to all the parks yet, also i can bug my brother while i’m there

theres a lot more but i’m too tired to fill out the rest of the list

90. How was your day today?

it was fine

91. Play an instrument?

used to play mellophone/french horn in band in high school. after I graduated I haven’t touched an instrument since

92. Describe the what you think of the ocean.

it’s scary

93. Do you believe in aliens or ghosts?

aliens as anything that counts as a living organism not of this world, not green little men from mars nonsense. the universe is too big for only life to be on earth. for ghosts, i’m still iffy about them, but that doesn’t mean i’m gonna start walking around haunted places and call the ghosts a bitch

94. Honestly, are things how you wanted them to be?

abosolutely not. every day I regret all the decisions i’ve made through my life. does that mean I’m trying to fix said mistakes or try not to do them again? lol no 

95. Do you have a mean bitchy scary side?

in my mind i do. I’m too scared of everyone to actually do it

96. When are you vulnerable?

always

97. How much free time do you have?

doesn’t feel like much. saturday and sunday go by way too fast and i feel like when i go home from work theres just not enough to relax. im tired all the time

98. Do you like to go hiking?

never been

99. Odd or Even Numbers?

even

100. Would you ever go sky diving, bungee jumping , cliff diving, wing suit gliding, parasailing, snorkeling, or other extreme activities?

no because I actually have self preservation. I am also a very big chicken

[julucid]

Jan 2 ' 18 / N21 / friend

its winter and theres a fuck ton of snow outside---im talking ski resort type of hills right on your doorsteps and they're pretty steep and high but somehow the people managed to clean up the streets and driveway enough for the cars to pass by. pretty much all of the neighborhood were playing around with their makeshift sleds and i was going rounds on my own---using a garbage can lid, even though the street was busy. the cars were driving so fast while the ground was still filled with wet muck and slush. at some point i thought the dream would end with me getting side-swept by one. the cars would just either swerve really dangerously or fly by, barely scraping the people fucking around. they always seemed to miss us like we repelled them like magnets. there was an impressive sized hill right next ours and this dude with a santa hat had a fancy sled; decorated festively---red and green paintjob, golden bells, plastic poinsettias, scattered evergreen leaves, chopped-up branches, and glitter all over it. he rode the steep-ass hill and flew up so far that he ended up on top of the neighbor's roof and everyone clapped and cheered for him. i was gonna ask if i could ride his sled once when i noticed that my friend (idk her irl but i felt strongly close to her) was missing. she was just sleding toward's a neighbor's driveway a few moments before and i didnt pay attention to what she was doing after that. i crossed over to the other side of the street and i didnt realize the whole scene has changed.

im no longer in a brooklyn neighborhood, but somehow in the middle of the city. its a little dark but not after sundown---maybe overcast weather. its no longer winter but early summer. im in a parking lot, and it smells a little like sewer steam and burnes tires. the lot was emptied out to make space for these panels. i dont know what they were there for but i guessed they were there to convert people to another religion. there were lots of people standing around just chilling with their friends and some were going up to the tables to listen to the panel speakers.

i felt a blue handball hit my thigh and snatched it in the air after it bounced. people in the crowd where playing catch and trying to keep the ball from falling as long as possible. some of the faces were familiar to me as if i knew them, but none of them had any names. the goal of the game was for half the people to stay rooted in their spots and wait for the ball to come their way and catch it while the other half is lurking around the crowd using people's bodies as their masks waiting for a ball to reach someone and steal the catch from them. if you looked at the crowd in the distance, the ball moves at fucking lightspeed and all you can see is a soft blur of blue looping and arching over people. sometimes people got hit by the ball and end up pulverized then another stranger pops out, out of nowhere in their spot to keep the crowd as dense as possible. i played a couple of rounds with them being scared as shit not knowing whether i should catch that tiny ball of death or not.

i only remembered i was there to find my friend when i saw her walking around dazed and wide eyed like she was lost. i wanted to call out to her but i didnt even know her name. she sat in a plastic chair in one of the panels and the guy next to her glanced at her and rubbed her back while he kept talking to the people. i never heard what they were saying the whole time i was there. the parking lot was quiet except for the sound of shoes shifting lazily. it was as if you could only hear what they were saying if you decided to be a follower of the religion---or hoodwinked. i grabbed her wrist and pulled her out of the table. the guy only looked at me for a moment then looked at the other people in the panel. they had blank expressions and didnt move to do anything as if they didnt care. i tried to talk to my friend but she wouldnt respond and she continued to stare at nothing. if i looked her right in the eyes, she didnt see me---like she was drugged. she looked so fragile and small that i fucking lost it then and went over to the guy that was touching her. i grabbed him by the collar to lift him up enough for me to punch the shit out of his dull face. my arm felt weird as if it was made out of wood and i couldnt control it as well as i wanted. the punches felt strong as i willed them to land but his face seemed to take forever before it even started bleeding. he didnt make a sound but just smiled at me. i wanted to stay there until i turned it to a pulp but the dream warped and i was in another place now.

the season changed again and it's late fall. leaves have already fallen. im in someone's back yard, but its waaaay too big too be a random suburban home. it seems like they were at the edge of a forrest, but i couldnt see the trees or the house even though i felt them. it was longer than it is wide---if you walked the whole thing from one end to the other, it would take weeks to finish. the whole perimeter was surrounded by a 10 feet white picket fence like there was no in and out. there were wooden structures inside. they look like super low tree houses or just random walls set up like a paint ball range. some were complicated and endless like a maze. i was alone and i still felt like i was there to get my friend back. i forgot alot of things that happened in that area because i was trying to go through the length and figure out what the fuck i was supposed to do there. towards the end i was running away from these men in black that i could barely see. it was only an or two hour after noon but they moved like shadows in the dark. they had katanas in their hands and for some reason i kept getting flashes of their weapons in my head. i kept running and didnt trip up but every few seconds i would see them in great detail and so close that the edge was seemed to cut the air i breathed. the sword was weirdly fat though, not like the normal flat sword. i mostly saw just their katanas and felt like i was being chased around by flying weapons. then the visions stopped and i all i saw was the never ending length i still had to run in front of me. my legs felt like they were shrinking and turning to dust. i started slowing down and my sight of line started sinking, i didnt look down but i knew that my body was turning into red and golden leaves among the others. i suddenly closed my eyes cause i felt like there was nothing left for me to see and one of the guys chasing me cut his katana through my shoulder and aimed low for my heart. i felt it go right out of my chest and my heart felt full.

the dream led me to the last scene. its early winter. im in a quiet neighborhood away from the city. the streets were high sloping hills that turned and twisted like a roller coaster but only going down and down. it was raining hard and i was with my friend now. we didnt talk but she was laughing. i just watched her as she did a running start and slid down the slope by having one foot in front of the other. she didnt fall but she just kept going faster. she was screaming and laughing out loud, her voice was echoing through the houses. i wondered why the neighbors werent peaking out their windows. i wanted to follow after her but I hesitated---until a giant wave of water started crashing by a street corner like a flushed toilet. i looked back down to my friend, she was still sliding and she was far away now, looking as small as toy. i started sliding down the street too and i somehow ended up sliding side by side her. she locked arms with me and the rain fell down even harder that i couldnt even make out her face clearly. i looked back and the waves were still near the top so i stopped worrying about it. it felt like we were never gonna stop sliding down though so my heart kept pumping with adrenalin. i closed my eyes and just layed my head on her shoulder. my body was light and i felt like i was flying through a storm.

i woke up with my hands frozen and my body shivering under the blankets.