#well not my dad's my dad is easy. i got him fancy chinese tea

[supercantaloupe]

latke dinner went over great, and so did the family gift exchange :)

[rein-ette]

Are you still working on your Commonwealth study? Do you have any thoughts on Arthur's relationships with his colonies apart from Canzuk + US?

Not properly, unfortunately with exams and then work I haven’t had mental/emotional capacity to do real research (and probably won’t for a while 😔). But I have continued to think about and develop certain relationships, and I think I also have old hcs I’ve never shared, so I’ll put those down!

Born into the Empire

Australia

@oumaheroes has already done such great hcs on him idk what I can add, but basically he was a little bit of a rowdy child, always breaking windows and shattering fancy pots, never able to sit still. I think rainbow once mentioned that Ken (short for Kenneth, my name for Aus) was a lot like England as a child in his curiosity and energy, and I wholeheartedly agree. But I think Arthur’s intensity was more inwardly directed, pushing him to pursue and master new talents and learn whatever he could, while Australia is a little more carefree in his love for the outdoors, exploring, jumping around and off things, little wild animals. Unfortunately for him, he was born in a period of the empire when Arthur was very serious about his kids education, and therefore often praised those who studied hard and learned fast, which really just wasn’t Australia’s cup of tea. Australia took this kinda hard and thought he was the “dumb” one in the family that Arthur was always scolding, but in reality Arthur knew and appreciated that Australias interests lay elsewhere — he was just a frustrated, tired, parent who really wanted to give his kids the best while also holding his empire together, two goals that were never going to fit well in the end and would completely exhaust him.

As Australia’s grown older he’s realized a bit of this (not entirely, though) and also that 1) he really did break a lot expensive things and cause general mayhem 2) scolding us Arthur’s way of showing he cares, if he didn’t he wouldn’t have payed attention to him at all 3) despite being a penal colony, he was still one of Arthur’s more “legitimate” children (being white and a boy) and was therefore still incredibly privileged — never having to question, for example, why it was that Arthur was his dad, if it should be this way, or if he had a seat at the family table at all (more on this later).

New Zealand

Zee, from birth, was a clear favourite. Obedient, calm, quietly intelligent, he would also later develop a blistering sense of humour which combined with his appearance made it overwhelmingly clear who’s child he was. If Ken questioned his place in the family because of his poor academic record and others did because of their appearance/race/other complications, Kaelan never had such problems; his siblings called him the “prince.” Zee, however, also had a charm that, like Matthew, endeared him to his siblings and mostly protected him from jealousy, though he certainly still had issues with being called a try hard, daddy’s boy, bossy, arrogant. Certainly as a child Zee was a little prideful and, under that unperturbed demeanour, willful, but he grew out of it by the 20th century and became one of those most trusted by Arthur, second only to Matthew. He’s also always been inseparable from his brother Australia despite their differences, and today they both have one of the healthiest and most amicable relationships with Arthur of any nation, let alone former colonies (family road trips, every summer).

Bermuda

I absolute fell in love with this girl after reading about here, once, in this fic by @shachaai, and after that my mind just ran away with me. For me, her human name given to her by Arthur just has to be Ariel — for the little mermaid reference, yes, symbolizing her connection to the sea and stunning good looks, but also because:

1. Ariel is a biblical name, meaning lion of God. This makes sense to me, because Bermuda began as a Portuguese trade post, so Arthur definitely consulted our resident bad catholic Port before naming her.

2. Ariel used to be boys name. This also makes sense, because I hc Bermuda was and still is a tomboy. Bitch is fierce, takes no prisoners, and has zero filter. Her letters to Arthur, which all the colonies sent so Arthur could keep an eye on things, were full of shit like “I swear to god if the Spanish don’t get out of my waters I might eat one of them,” and “father, I asked you for destroyers two months ago, and yet you sent them to Hong Kong — could you explain this most unusual occurrence, surely it’s not that you forgot”, and “thank you for the harpoon on my birthday, I caught a small shark a couple days ago and have sent you some of its teeth for your collection.” Arthur tolerates this attitude because he’s weak when it comes to girls; he absolutely spoils his daughters (and flushes like a 16 year old when a woman so much as bats her eyelashes at him). Yes, p*ssywhipped Arthur is a hill I will die on.

3. It also suits her because? Ariel? Shakespeare? The Tempest? Bermuda Triangle? Shipwrecks? Daughter-like figure of powerful and vengeful sorcerer? Yeah. And this girl is a fire spirit — she is so lively, snarky, clever. As she’s grown older she’s mellowed out a little, but still: a no shit taken, no fucks given type of gal.

4. Speaking of growing up, she’s also become quite the beauty. Shacha, if I’m remembering correctly, described her as dark skinned, wavy-haired, and green eyed and that image has been burned onto the back of my eyelids ever since. Those Iberian genetics really be pulling through for her, that’s for sure. Engport love child if I’ve ever seen one. Definitely one of the prettiest in her family.

Singapore

I’ve already mentioned this to needcake, but I’m not too big a fan of canon Singapore, so this is my oc version. Singapore is fascinating to me because it had only a very small local population before it became a colony (The original settlement had actually been destroyed by the Portuguese about two centuries before the British started building a port there.) So nation-tans like Singapore and Bermuda really are Arthur’s children in the most direct sense of the word. And yet, Singapore is mostly ethnically Chinese, with Malays being the second largest group. Growing up Asian in a white, Victorian era family surely cannot have been easy and more than once Singapore probably wondered if there hadn’t been some mistake. To make up for the constant fear that he wasn’t “really” British, Singapore studied ferociously and had a truly terrifying work ethic. I’m not sure if this is common knowledge outside Asian circles, so I’ll mention that this hc comes from the fact Singapore is well known for having truly exceptional students and some of the most prestigious schools. Singaporeans score highly in literally everything and they have an advantage with good English learning environments, a highly desirable trait in Asia, but these results come from brutally long hours — and its really saying something that they’re known for working hard, considering the studying ethic of students in Korea, Japan, and China aint nothing to sneeze at, either. To me this actually fits really well with Singapore’s upbringing in Arthur’s household, because Arthur himself prizes intelligence and hard work above all else, being a workaholic himself.

As for their relationship, it was probably the best when Singapore was young and peaked in the 1930s with the massive naval base the British built at Singapore, at the time the largest dry dock in the world. Singapore was a well-behaved child, not necessarily introverted but not rowdy either, and all the way into his teenage years he truly admired Arthur and was proud to be a part of the British Empire, despite his lingering unease and insecurities. The British defeat in World War II, however, was a massive turning point. He had worked his ass off to be a good son, a good brother, to contribute to the only family and system he had ever known, and he had thought by the 30s he was finally on his way to becoming a fine adult. And suddenly, the British surrender brings his entire world crashing down. He had followed the rules faithfully thinking it was his destiny, but suddenly it was clear that all rules were made up. Of course, his insecurities exploded. If the empire was a ruse, what the hell was he? A part of the illusion? He couldn’t have a truly Asian identity, because many of the old East Asian nations shunned him for his Western upbringing, and he could not entirely understand their values either. So he was a kid who kinda had to figure out late and very very suddenly who the fuck he was and wanted to be.

And, well, he’s done pretty well for himself, hasn’t he. After having a total crisis and questioning everything, I think Singapore slowly started to realize that just because the British Empire as a political entity didn’t last forever, that didn’t mean that his entire childhood and identity weren’t real. The love he gave to his siblings and the love he got back, the hard work he put in, his bond with Arthur and the safe, happy childhood he had — those memories and feelings didnt have to be diminished by what came after. Essentially, he learned the lesson all nations have to learn, which is that one needs to be able to discern between duties as a nation and feelings as a human being, and to some extent keep them separate to protect both.

Whoooooo ok I’ll stop there because this turned into a dissertation, sorry. Let me know if there are any specifics u want me to elaborate on or anything I missed, but I’ll leave this here for today :)

[canaryatlaw]

okay. so today was good. I’m oddly tired right now, but whatever. I woke up to my alarm at 11, got ready, and left by 11:30 to go to my dad’s office by 12, because he was having his office christmas party today and wanted me to be there. not long after I got there we headed out to this old historical restaurant out here that’s pretty fancy and such. it was mostly the young people that work with him, which was nice. The girl I had been talking to last week when I was at his office talked with me for most of the time, we really hit it off, I think we get along very well. I got the pot roast grilled cheese for lunch, which was of course every bit as amazing as it sounds, and then of course got ice cream for dessert. when we finished we went outside and walked around the little “Christmas Village” of shops they have outside and took some silly pictures in the little stick your face in here photo displays. it was a little cold so we didn’t spend too much time there. Afterwards we went back to the office and I was gonna hang out there for a little while until I had to go to my doctors appointment which is closer to my dad’s office than home, so it didn’t make sense for me to go home and then back out. I ended up talking to the same girl for most of it, some stuff about jobs and then just about other cases and bizarre situations that we’d come across. apparently for the GAL’s office out here (so the equivalent of the Chicago office I interned in) will only hire like, people who have interned there, and they have like 5 spots open, which they’re already in 2nd or 3rd round interviews for, and they’ll probably be filled by January. so that’s....less than ideal, though at this point that particular job isn’t all that high on my preferred job list, but I’m still concerned about not being able to find one. my school is registered for a conference in February that’s like midwest public interest law and will be conducting some on site interviews with different organizations that you have to sign up for in advance, so that has some potential. I just know I’m gonna end up feeling so bad if I end up anywhere other than New York, because I know it’ll be a disappointment to my parents, who are apparently telling everyone I am coming back, and I really don’t want to do that to them...but New York jobs are somewhat limited. sigh. this isn’t easy. anyway. I left for my appointment with my psychiatrist and had to wait a while which is fairly usual, but I always like seeing him because he’s a really nice guy and he’s super understanding. he’s retiring soon so he’s been slowly handing off patients, and he’s already handed off my brother and my mom who were seeing him, but he agreed to see me through May at least, which I appreciated because I’m somewhat hesitant to trust anyone else with my mental health at this point, especially after this summer’s episode which was a intense reminder of just how fragile my brain chemistry is. But we talked, I said I was doing pretty well, which I am, so we could leave the meds in place, which he was happy about of course, now that I’m somewhat leveled off after the summer mess. my brother and his behavior towards me for most of my life came up at some point a few appointments ago and he’s been asking a bit about that every time, which I don't mind of course, it’s just kind of weird for me to be talking about it to another actual person like that (as opposed to just writing it on the internet for random strangers to see). and it’s an odd dynamic because he knows my brother, he used to treat my brother, but he’s been very calm about it and definitely believes what I say, so I appreciate that. He asks things like what do you think he would do if you brought it up with him now, and sadly I know the answer to that is he would laugh it off and refuse to take it seriously, because he doesn't think he’s done anything wrong, and I don't think there’s anything I can do to convince him otherwise (ugh, he’s such a narcissist). but anyway. good appointment. I stopped at Target quickly, planning just to get some red food coloring so I could finish icing my gingerbread cookies, but got bombarded by text messages from my family about bringing home more of their favorite seltzer brand, “Spindrift” which mixes in some fruit juice but no unnatural sugar and it’s pretty damn good. keep in mind I bought 16 cans of it less than a week ago, but they’ve apparently already been drank (the joys of living in a big family) so I brought them back 24 this time, and we’ll see how long that lasts lol. I also brought home some strawberry lemonade mix just so I could change it up on drink options. I was gonna get ice tea mix too, but I couldn’t find it other than like, crystal light, and I don’t do fake sugar so that wasn’t an option. Came home, had some leftover chinese food, then got to work icing the rest of my gingerbread cookies. It went pretty smoothly, the icing consistency between the two (the outline icing and the fill in icing) was pretty good so that worked. I need to get to work on more cookies on my list though if I’m gonna have them done by Christmas. I’ll definitely do some work on that tomorrow, although I’ll probably go with my sister to Ulta and potentially the mall at some point tomorrow. After I finished that, instead of sitting with my laptop with my parents watching HGTV, I decided to go in the back room where my younger brother (not the one discussed above) was watching a hockey game, and I figured sure why not we can change it up a little bit. I was mostly on my laptop, but I did still find the game to be fairly interesting, it obviously shares some qualities with soccer which I love of course so I could appreciate those aspects of it. I also think it’s kind of insane that people were like “hey, you know what we should do with this sport? we should put it on ice” (according to my brother it was the Canadians idea). but yeah, watched the game, where the NY Rangers lost in a shoot out, so that’s always disappointing. I stuck around for a little while longer while both of my brothers played video games, then headed upstairs to get ready for bed and here we are. Tomorrow like I said will probably be chill, do some baking and probably dye my sister’s hair, maybe do my own since it’s fairly overdue, and I have to actually wrap my presents at some point. so we’ll see how that goes. Like I said at the beginning of this post though, I’m tired and I can feel the melatonin making my eyelids heavy, so I’m gonna stop fighting it now and go to bed. Goodnight dolls. Have a lovely evening.

[caroundtheworld-blog1]

06/08/17 - Sydney

A month or so before they arrived, I messaged my Mum and Dad and asked them what they’d like to do whilst they were here, and where they’d like to go. Sydney was one of the choices. My mum did 6 months in Australia when she was 18, and she still talks about how great Sydney is, so I knew how much she wanted to go back. I also knew it would be no easy feat, we’re a 10 hour drive north from Sydney, and to get there, do it all, and get back would take a minimum of two days, and would leave us exhausted. But we had spare days, three drivers, and no pressing engagements so we decided to go for it. 

We left on the Saturday night at around 8pm, and drove non-stop for 10 hours in shifts. My parents drove most of it and I did around 2 hours or so, with Daniel in the passenger seat, so they could both get some sleep in the back. The journey was fine, for me anyway as I slept through most of it. There were fears that we might hit a kangaroo, as we’d seen a few on the side of the road, and there were warnings everywhere, and it was pitch black. A kangaroo hopping out in front of you when you’re doing 110km/h on the motorway is less than ideal, but thankfully we (and the kangaroos) didn’t have to deal with anything so awful. The sat-nav did get a bit confused as it was a new road, so the arrow sat in fields for hours twirling around, trying to figure out what was going on. But we made it, in one piece, to Sydney at around 7.30 Sunday morning. We parked (when it finally opened) for a $15 all day flat rate, and headed off to explore the city.

We only had one day to do Sydney, which sounds like an impossible task. But thanks to the invention of hop-on hop-off services, it turned out to be quite easy. We used the Big Bus hop-on hop-off service, and the Captain Cook hop-on hop-off boat. We caught the train to Circular Quay and booked tickets for both, I used my student card which is still valid until September for a discount, much to my mother’s delight. They also offer senior discount, which is where my dad comes in handy. We grabbed some breakfast and then headed for the bus. We bagged the front seats on the top deck, it was quite quiet as it was early, and stayed on the bus tour for the entire route. The Big Bus tours offer a red route and a blue route; the red does all the major areas and landmarks of the city, and if you change onto the blue route, you can also do the famous Bondi Beach. We were pushed for time so we skipped Bondi, as the whole thing would have taken 4 hours. The sightseeing tour around the city took an hour and a half and included every important inch of Sydney. there was loads of information and it was a beautiful winter’s day (Australian winter so around 20°C) , so it was nice to just sit back, listen, and enjoy the city sights.

After our bus tour, we headed to Circular Quay to hop on our boat tour of the harbour. Captain Cook provide various different boat cruises regularly throughout the day. The hop-on, hop-off tour stops at 11 places around the harbour. We were a bit pushed for time so chose two stops and decided we’d stay on the boat for the rest of the journey, to enjoy the sights. Our first stop was Fort Denison, and we arrived on the island just in time for the daily cannon firing. Fort Denison is an island, formerly a penal site and defensive fortress, that sits in Sydney harbour, about 1km east of the opera house. The island is now a protected national park and popular tourist attraction. Every day at 1pm, a cannon is fired, this tradition began in 1906, and was intended to help sailors to accurately set their ship’s chronometers. The daily firing stopped during WWII, as it was feared that it would alarm residents, a fair assumption, and it was started again in 1986. It was a pretty cool thing to see, and learn about, we all did a countdown to the firing (which actually turned out to be late, the gun fired on ‘2′), and covered our ears to protect them from the sound. The ranger was really informative, and told us a lot of interesting historical facts about the firing, and the island itself. There’s also a free museum that tells you all about the history of the island, including a film with historical footage and pictures. The island is not only a really fascinating piece of history, it also boasts some of the best views of the city, this was an excellent opportunity to take photos whilst we waited for our next boat. 

After Fort Denison, we stayed on the boat until our final destination, enjoying the sights and soaking up the sun (it was also so windy, would definitely recommend taking an extra coat or something, we went in Winter, but even so, the 20 degree weather felt like 10 when that wind blew). It was a really pleasant and relaxing journey that provided amazing views of the city and surrounding areas, and a lot of interesting information too.

Our final stop was Darling Harbour to grab something to eat. Darling Harbour is packed full of restaurants and bars, if you want to eat but aren’t sure what you fancy, head here, there are so many choices of restaurant, and some really cool bars too. We settled on an Italian place overlooking the harbour (Darling, not Sydney) where there was some sort of boat/yacht thing going on, I think rich people were letting the masses on board their boats for a nosey or something like that. One of the most exciting moments of the day was when we thought Russell Crowe walked past (we were split 50/50 as to whether it was actually him). I tweeted him to confirm, but before he got back to me, the same man walked past us again, and we were able to confirm that no, it definitely wasn’t Russell Crowe, much to our disappointment. After our late lunch we headed back towards the hop-on hop-off bus, planning to get off at a stop near where the car was parked. On the way back to the car, we passed The Chinese Garden of Friendship, which I’d wanted to visit all day. The gardens were built in 1988, colonial Australia’s bicentennial year, as a symbol of friendship between Sydney, and the city of Guangzhou in Guangdong province in China, the two cities are sister cities, and both states are sister states. An oasis of peace in the city, it boasts beautiful waterfalls, traditional Chinese architecture, exotic plants, ponds filled with Koi carp, and a traditional Chinese tea house. Unfortunately, it was quite late in the day and the gardens were just closing as we arrived, but it’s at the top of my list for my next visit to the city.

Our day in Sydney was well worth the long drive it took to get there. We packed so much in in such a short space of time, and really got to experience one of the most iconic cities in the world. It was especially great that I got to share it with my parents, and that my Mum got to go back to one of her favourite places. If you’re in Sydney, and pushed for time, I would definitely recommend doing the hop-on hop-off thing. My favourite was the boat, that would definitely be my first pick, and there are so many interesting stops around the harbour. But the bus tour gives you loads of great info and you get to see the whole city in a couple of hours, as well as Bondi if you choose to do the blue line as well. I can’t wait to go back and explore, and see what else this iconic, and vibrant city has to offer!

[samanthasroberts]

50 Thoughtful Last Minute Christmas Gifts For Procrastinators 

http://bit.ly/2Eq5KzI

Cataloged in Holidays

50 Thoughtful Last Minute Christmas Gifts For Procrastinators 

January Nelson Updated December 11, 2018

If you still haven’t finished your holiday shopping, you should think about buying these last-minute gifts suggested by Ask Reddit.

1. Mason jar + equal parts granulated sugar and veg oil + either a few drops of essential oil OR some lemon zest OR vanilla extract = boutique grade body scrub.

2. Buy tickets online for a upcoming play, dinner & show, concert, game, etc. Print out page of ticket confirmation and put it in a nice Christmas card envelope. It’s an awesome gift because people tend to love it more than clothing or other junk you usually give. And if you’re parents are like mine, they barely take the initiative to go to these type of events themselves or don’t even know about them. Experience > material goods.

3. Run to the grocery store, pick up chocolate morsels, butter, and cream.

Takes about five hours to make 200 chocolate truffles. Easy to make them different flavors as well. (Orange, Bailey’s Irish Cream, and Cinnamon Honey are the good with milk chocolate. Peppermint, Khalua, and Matcha are good with dark chocolate. Peppermint and matcha are fantastic with white chocolate.)

4. At least for men, my go-to is always a beard or personal grooming kit. It’s likely something that they wouldn’t buy themselves, and many haven’t felt the exhilaration of a peppermint shampoo. Men deserve a little pampering and self care too!

5. I think mugs make a good last minute gift because they’re available at most stores, pretty cheap for a gift, and will actually be used by the recipient.

6. Socks. High-end, badass, toasty warm (if you live where it gets cold) socks. Smartwool/Darn Tough/etc.. They may “meh” at it early on, but will thank you later. Maybe even very later, but it’ll be appreciated (a lot) eventually.

7. Most people I know don’t have bluetooth hook ups in their car, FM Transmitters are absolutely fantastic, they’re relatively cheap and life changers for folks that like to listen to music while driving, Probably $15 and under.

One of those copper chef/gotham steel type skillets. They’re fantastic, less than $20, endless use.

8. Cookie/brownie mix in a mason jar with instructions on a card and a bow.

Or a visa gift card.

9. Fancy pasta, fancy jarred sauce, nice block of parm cheese, in a serving bowl with a kitchen towel. You can do this as expensively or as cheaply as you want.

I also loved a book called The Fortune Cookie Chronicles by Jennifer 8 Lee (basically, a woman exploring Chinese food in the USA as well as her own Chinese roots, and the history of fortune cookies… really fascinating). She talks a lot about soy sauce in that book, so I’ve given that book with a bottle of “real” soy sauce many times. I love sharing things I love with other people, so that’s a gift I love to give.

10. Subscription box. Like coffee? Subscription box. Board games? Subscription box. Make up? Subscription box. Ties or socks or yarn or hot sauce or tea or beer or wine or Japanese candy or marvel or harry porter or fitness? Subscription mother-fuckin box.

11. Go to the dollar store and grab some over the hand oven mitts, then head to the grocery store and get cake & brownie mixes, hand write the baking directions on a decorated index card or slip of paper. Personalize each one with a message or somesuch. Bam.

12. If it’s someone you’re fairly close to, print out a photo of the two of you and put it in a frame. It feels thoughtful, but can also be done in less than an hour and is cheap.

13. Depends how well I know them, or if I’ve used the same trick before – but it’s probably a cast iron skillet. Costs $20 for a good one (rhymes with dodge), and I always get thanked for it, like a year later.

14. Aldi.

A million calories of chocolate for about twenty quid.

Enough to distribute to everyone.

15. Here is what I do every year.

I go buy gift certificates for my favorite restaurants, and gift cards from Best Buy. I then put them in Christmas cards with no name on them.

I keep some in the house and some in my car.

If someone gives me a gift, I say “Wait a minute, I have something for you too” and go get the card. I quickly write their name on it and hand it to them.

Its worked out perfectly for me for years. I give everyone that gives me something, and if I end up with extra gift certificates or gift cards, I just use them on myself.

16. I make them an elaborate Christmas card with an etymology of their name. It’s always a hit and has more meaning than a gift card.

17. Good pair of headphones.

18. I make very good gingerbread cookies and decorate them very elaborately, like I’ll draw a portrait of them in frosting or I draw a cartoon character they like. Im pretty good at it.

19. Chia pet. So many varieties. ‘Ironic’ gift for those recipients, awesome gift for the others.

Either way you are a hero!

20. Those soft-ass blankets you find in any store around Christmas time. And then I buy one more for me. Every goddamn year

21. For girls: anything from Anthropologie. They have a great gifts and the quality/craftsmanship is decent. That and they gift wrap beautifully for free! I use this for last minute birthday gifts quite often and it always impresses.

For guy: gift cards or booze. Guys appreciate utility.

22. Nail place… Women will go wild over a free mani-pedi.

23. A bottle of their favorite spirits, or for non-drinkers/kids, a book.

24. BOOKS!

There is a book on literally any topic ever.

Fan of Formula 1? Book.

Fan of Jujitsu? Book.

Like economic news? Book.

Porn? Book.

Lonely? Book.

Want to improve yourself? Book.

And you can get books everywhere. Online, in store, thrift stores, little free libraries, everywhere.

25. Houseplants!

I usually have lots of spiderplant babies and keep a few small pots on hand. Great for all occasions.

26. Those Hickory Farms meat and cheese gift boxes.

27. For a family – Get a tin bucket of gourmet holiday popcorn (caramel / chocolate flavored popcorn) to share.

For a dude – Get a bottle of fancy champagne or other booze like whisky or bourbon.

For anyone younger than 30 – Get an Amazon gift card.

For a kid – Give them a $50 dollar bill. They likely never handle money and if they do, the $50 looks so much better than the $20. Easy way to become the cool uncle.

For a girl – Get them a gift certificate to a local salon, a big blanket, or fun warm socks (not regular socks but those nicer holiday woven socks).

For your mom – Get her an ornament that has sentimental value, or, go to the mall (who does that anymore) and get them to hand paint an ornament on the spot with the family name & year on it.

For your dad – Get him NFL or NBA tickets.

28. Things that are consumable… everyone has way too many junk trinkets just because someone felt they had to buy something.

Ground coffee from a local coffee shop (if you know the person has a grinder, get whole bean, but not everyone does). They usually have fun Christmas flavors this time of year.

A bottle of dry wine or champagne.

Nice candles (go for ones that are soy based and have lids) or liquid hand soap.

29. Who wants lottery tickets?!?!?!

30. If we’re talking non-money gifts you know what’s a great go to? TJ Maxx. They are just a hodgepodge of random stuff and they have bailed me out so much when it comes to gift giving because with all the things they have you are bound to find something for everyone.

31. Home made egg nog, Irish cream, or Kahlúa. Most people will love one of the three, they are easy to make, made by hand, affordable, and our gifts that go away.

32. I’d bake a bunch of stuff or make fancy looking caramel apples. If I give people food, they seem to be satisfied.

33. I’ll do a blanket/candle/bottle of wine/nice beer and fudge,

OR a movie/board game and stop by the dollar store for a shower caddy, fill it with popcorn, movie candies, etc if it’s for a family. Do a caddy and filler per family member.

34. Starbucks gift card. Everyone loves Starbucks.

35. Lego. Lego for the nephew, lego for dad, lego for mom, lego for granny, lego for EVERYONE!

36. Spicery subscription for three months. Print out the confirmation and chuck it in an envelope. I’ve gifted this twice and both recipients said that they never wanted any other present from me – just for that subscription to repeat.

37. If it’s last minute, I tried to go to a clothing store I know they have clothes from. Throughout the year I’ll ask “bro, nice jacket, where’d you get it?” Then I remember their spot and get them a gift card.

Then to cover my ass cause some people are weird about gift cards I say “I saw a _____ while shopping but I couldn’t remember your size/didn’t know what color you’d like/etc.”

38. Magazine subscriptions. The New Yorker. Times Literary Supplement. New Scientist. Private Eye. Done them all.

39. Mom – Candles and epsom salts.

Brother – Steam/eShop card, or go to a second hand store and find a game I think he’d like.

Dad – Itunes Gift Card or some kind of sports paraphernalia.

Girlfriend – something that reminds me of her, or that I think she’d love (last Christmas it was a pair of socks that said ,”I’m a delicate fucking flower”).

40. I buy ten copies of the best book I’ve read all year and wrap em in newspaper.

Proof of success: I do this every year

41. A brick of batteries. Everybody needs batteries, nobody will say no to batteries, and they will think of you when they are in a pinch and realize you got them a BRICK of batteries.

Great practical gift.

42. Throw blankets from the 24-hour drugstore. They’re $15 and nice enough that I use them myself. This is also my go-to for any gift swap at the office/with people I don’t know super well.

43. Pictures! Take a picture of something the receiver will like, or find one you might already have, throw it in a cheap frame and WABANG

44. Go to CVS and get a gift card (they have Amazon, iTunes, random others). Swing buy a restaurant and grab a gift card for that place. Last ditch, don’t have time to get a hard copy of a gift card- just buy one online that you can email.

45. Luxury kitchen stuff.

There’s a great kitchen & dinnerware shop within walking distance of my home. I can get pretty dinnerware, flatware, glasses and linens in a range of styles, and they have durable, high quality cookware for the more practically minded people. It’s my go to gift-shop, because everyone eats.

46. Lava Lamp!

No one has one.

They’re 20$

Oh, and it’s neat.

47. I’d bring them all to a restaurant and pay for their meal-> easy way to make a party and present at the same time without having to worry about what to buy them since they can order themselves what they want

48. Pharmacies always have cheap last minute crap like travel manicure kits and hot sauce samplers.

49. You get a box of chocolate! You get a box of chocolate! And you get a box of chocolate! Everyone gets a box of chocolate!!!

50. Cash, candy, and/or alcohol.

0

Image Credit: Anthony Tran

is cataloged in Last Minute Gifts, Presents

What if kindness was cool?

What if you could live a life that would make YOU jealous? What if you could make just one person’s day better with a few simple words of encouragement?  is a book of inspirational words that will keep you fighting and ask you never to give up on life, yourself, or others. Open a page to start your day, frame a page that inspires you to keep living, share a page with a friend who needs support, or leave one behind for a complete stranger to brighten their day.

Join The Kindness Revolution

Source: http://allofbeer.com/50-thoughtful-last-minute-christmas-gifts-for-procrastinators/

from All of Beer https://allofbeer.wordpress.com/2019/04/22/50-thoughtful-last-minute-christmas-gifts-for-procrastinators/

[adambstingus]

50 Thoughtful Last Minute Christmas Gifts For Procrastinators 

http://bit.ly/2Eq5KzI

Cataloged in Holidays

50 Thoughtful Last Minute Christmas Gifts For Procrastinators 

January Nelson Updated December 11, 2018

If you still haven’t finished your holiday shopping, you should think about buying these last-minute gifts suggested by Ask Reddit.

1. Mason jar + equal parts granulated sugar and veg oil + either a few drops of essential oil OR some lemon zest OR vanilla extract = boutique grade body scrub.

2. Buy tickets online for a upcoming play, dinner & show, concert, game, etc. Print out page of ticket confirmation and put it in a nice Christmas card envelope. It’s an awesome gift because people tend to love it more than clothing or other junk you usually give. And if you’re parents are like mine, they barely take the initiative to go to these type of events themselves or don’t even know about them. Experience > material goods.

3. Run to the grocery store, pick up chocolate morsels, butter, and cream.

Takes about five hours to make 200 chocolate truffles. Easy to make them different flavors as well. (Orange, Bailey’s Irish Cream, and Cinnamon Honey are the good with milk chocolate. Peppermint, Khalua, and Matcha are good with dark chocolate. Peppermint and matcha are fantastic with white chocolate.)

4. At least for men, my go-to is always a beard or personal grooming kit. It’s likely something that they wouldn’t buy themselves, and many haven’t felt the exhilaration of a peppermint shampoo. Men deserve a little pampering and self care too!

5. I think mugs make a good last minute gift because they’re available at most stores, pretty cheap for a gift, and will actually be used by the recipient.

6. Socks. High-end, badass, toasty warm (if you live where it gets cold) socks. Smartwool/Darn Tough/etc.. They may “meh” at it early on, but will thank you later. Maybe even very later, but it’ll be appreciated (a lot) eventually.

7. Most people I know don’t have bluetooth hook ups in their car, FM Transmitters are absolutely fantastic, they’re relatively cheap and life changers for folks that like to listen to music while driving, Probably $15 and under.

One of those copper chef/gotham steel type skillets. They’re fantastic, less than $20, endless use.

8. Cookie/brownie mix in a mason jar with instructions on a card and a bow.

Or a visa gift card.

9. Fancy pasta, fancy jarred sauce, nice block of parm cheese, in a serving bowl with a kitchen towel. You can do this as expensively or as cheaply as you want.

I also loved a book called The Fortune Cookie Chronicles by Jennifer 8 Lee (basically, a woman exploring Chinese food in the USA as well as her own Chinese roots, and the history of fortune cookies… really fascinating). She talks a lot about soy sauce in that book, so I’ve given that book with a bottle of “real” soy sauce many times. I love sharing things I love with other people, so that’s a gift I love to give.

10. Subscription box. Like coffee? Subscription box. Board games? Subscription box. Make up? Subscription box. Ties or socks or yarn or hot sauce or tea or beer or wine or Japanese candy or marvel or harry porter or fitness? Subscription mother-fuckin box.

11. Go to the dollar store and grab some over the hand oven mitts, then head to the grocery store and get cake & brownie mixes, hand write the baking directions on a decorated index card or slip of paper. Personalize each one with a message or somesuch. Bam.

12. If it’s someone you’re fairly close to, print out a photo of the two of you and put it in a frame. It feels thoughtful, but can also be done in less than an hour and is cheap.

13. Depends how well I know them, or if I’ve used the same trick before – but it’s probably a cast iron skillet. Costs $20 for a good one (rhymes with dodge), and I always get thanked for it, like a year later.

14. Aldi.

A million calories of chocolate for about twenty quid.

Enough to distribute to everyone.

15. Here is what I do every year.

I go buy gift certificates for my favorite restaurants, and gift cards from Best Buy. I then put them in Christmas cards with no name on them.

I keep some in the house and some in my car.

If someone gives me a gift, I say “Wait a minute, I have something for you too” and go get the card. I quickly write their name on it and hand it to them.

Its worked out perfectly for me for years. I give everyone that gives me something, and if I end up with extra gift certificates or gift cards, I just use them on myself.

16. I make them an elaborate Christmas card with an etymology of their name. It’s always a hit and has more meaning than a gift card.

17. Good pair of headphones.

18. I make very good gingerbread cookies and decorate them very elaborately, like I’ll draw a portrait of them in frosting or I draw a cartoon character they like. Im pretty good at it.

19. Chia pet. So many varieties. ‘Ironic’ gift for those recipients, awesome gift for the others.

Either way you are a hero!

20. Those soft-ass blankets you find in any store around Christmas time. And then I buy one more for me. Every goddamn year

21. For girls: anything from Anthropologie. They have a great gifts and the quality/craftsmanship is decent. That and they gift wrap beautifully for free! I use this for last minute birthday gifts quite often and it always impresses.

For guy: gift cards or booze. Guys appreciate utility.

22. Nail place… Women will go wild over a free mani-pedi.

23. A bottle of their favorite spirits, or for non-drinkers/kids, a book.

24. BOOKS!

There is a book on literally any topic ever.

Fan of Formula 1? Book.

Fan of Jujitsu? Book.

Like economic news? Book.

Porn? Book.

Lonely? Book.

Want to improve yourself? Book.

And you can get books everywhere. Online, in store, thrift stores, little free libraries, everywhere.

25. Houseplants!

I usually have lots of spiderplant babies and keep a few small pots on hand. Great for all occasions.

26. Those Hickory Farms meat and cheese gift boxes.

27. For a family – Get a tin bucket of gourmet holiday popcorn (caramel / chocolate flavored popcorn) to share.

For a dude – Get a bottle of fancy champagne or other booze like whisky or bourbon.

For anyone younger than 30 – Get an Amazon gift card.

For a kid – Give them a $50 dollar bill. They likely never handle money and if they do, the $50 looks so much better than the $20. Easy way to become the cool uncle.

For a girl – Get them a gift certificate to a local salon, a big blanket, or fun warm socks (not regular socks but those nicer holiday woven socks).

For your mom – Get her an ornament that has sentimental value, or, go to the mall (who does that anymore) and get them to hand paint an ornament on the spot with the family name & year on it.

For your dad – Get him NFL or NBA tickets.

28. Things that are consumable… everyone has way too many junk trinkets just because someone felt they had to buy something.

Ground coffee from a local coffee shop (if you know the person has a grinder, get whole bean, but not everyone does). They usually have fun Christmas flavors this time of year.

A bottle of dry wine or champagne.

Nice candles (go for ones that are soy based and have lids) or liquid hand soap.

29. Who wants lottery tickets?!?!?!

30. If we’re talking non-money gifts you know what’s a great go to? TJ Maxx. They are just a hodgepodge of random stuff and they have bailed me out so much when it comes to gift giving because with all the things they have you are bound to find something for everyone.

31. Home made egg nog, Irish cream, or Kahlúa. Most people will love one of the three, they are easy to make, made by hand, affordable, and our gifts that go away.

32. I’d bake a bunch of stuff or make fancy looking caramel apples. If I give people food, they seem to be satisfied.

33. I’ll do a blanket/candle/bottle of wine/nice beer and fudge,

OR a movie/board game and stop by the dollar store for a shower caddy, fill it with popcorn, movie candies, etc if it’s for a family. Do a caddy and filler per family member.

34. Starbucks gift card. Everyone loves Starbucks.

35. Lego. Lego for the nephew, lego for dad, lego for mom, lego for granny, lego for EVERYONE!

36. Spicery subscription for three months. Print out the confirmation and chuck it in an envelope. I’ve gifted this twice and both recipients said that they never wanted any other present from me – just for that subscription to repeat.

37. If it’s last minute, I tried to go to a clothing store I know they have clothes from. Throughout the year I’ll ask “bro, nice jacket, where’d you get it?” Then I remember their spot and get them a gift card.

Then to cover my ass cause some people are weird about gift cards I say “I saw a _____ while shopping but I couldn’t remember your size/didn’t know what color you’d like/etc.”

38. Magazine subscriptions. The New Yorker. Times Literary Supplement. New Scientist. Private Eye. Done them all.

39. Mom – Candles and epsom salts.

Brother – Steam/eShop card, or go to a second hand store and find a game I think he’d like.

Dad – Itunes Gift Card or some kind of sports paraphernalia.

Girlfriend – something that reminds me of her, or that I think she��d love (last Christmas it was a pair of socks that said ,”I’m a delicate fucking flower”).

40. I buy ten copies of the best book I’ve read all year and wrap em in newspaper.

Proof of success: I do this every year

41. A brick of batteries. Everybody needs batteries, nobody will say no to batteries, and they will think of you when they are in a pinch and realize you got them a BRICK of batteries.

Great practical gift.

42. Throw blankets from the 24-hour drugstore. They’re $15 and nice enough that I use them myself. This is also my go-to for any gift swap at the office/with people I don’t know super well.

43. Pictures! Take a picture of something the receiver will like, or find one you might already have, throw it in a cheap frame and WABANG

44. Go to CVS and get a gift card (they have Amazon, iTunes, random others). Swing buy a restaurant and grab a gift card for that place. Last ditch, don’t have time to get a hard copy of a gift card- just buy one online that you can email.

45. Luxury kitchen stuff.

There’s a great kitchen & dinnerware shop within walking distance of my home. I can get pretty dinnerware, flatware, glasses and linens in a range of styles, and they have durable, high quality cookware for the more practically minded people. It’s my go to gift-shop, because everyone eats.

46. Lava Lamp!

No one has one.

They’re 20$

Oh, and it’s neat.

47. I’d bring them all to a restaurant and pay for their meal-> easy way to make a party and present at the same time without having to worry about what to buy them since they can order themselves what they want

48. Pharmacies always have cheap last minute crap like travel manicure kits and hot sauce samplers.

49. You get a box of chocolate! You get a box of chocolate! And you get a box of chocolate! Everyone gets a box of chocolate!!!

50. Cash, candy, and/or alcohol.

0

Image Credit: Anthony Tran

is cataloged in Last Minute Gifts, Presents

What if kindness was cool?

What if you could live a life that would make YOU jealous? What if you could make just one person’s day better with a few simple words of encouragement?  is a book of inspirational words that will keep you fighting and ask you never to give up on life, yourself, or others. Open a page to start your day, frame a page that inspires you to keep living, share a page with a friend who needs support, or leave one behind for a complete stranger to brighten their day.

Join The Kindness Revolution

from All Of Beer http://allofbeer.com/50-thoughtful-last-minute-christmas-gifts-for-procrastinators/ from All of Beer https://allofbeercom.tumblr.com/post/184356935077

[allofbeercom]

50 Thoughtful Last Minute Christmas Gifts For Procrastinators 

http://bit.ly/2Eq5KzI

Cataloged in Holidays

50 Thoughtful Last Minute Christmas Gifts For Procrastinators 

January Nelson Updated December 11, 2018

If you still haven’t finished your holiday shopping, you should think about buying these last-minute gifts suggested by Ask Reddit.

1. Mason jar + equal parts granulated sugar and veg oil + either a few drops of essential oil OR some lemon zest OR vanilla extract = boutique grade body scrub.

2. Buy tickets online for a upcoming play, dinner & show, concert, game, etc. Print out page of ticket confirmation and put it in a nice Christmas card envelope. It’s an awesome gift because people tend to love it more than clothing or other junk you usually give. And if you’re parents are like mine, they barely take the initiative to go to these type of events themselves or don’t even know about them. Experience > material goods.

3. Run to the grocery store, pick up chocolate morsels, butter, and cream.

Takes about five hours to make 200 chocolate truffles. Easy to make them different flavors as well. (Orange, Bailey’s Irish Cream, and Cinnamon Honey are the good with milk chocolate. Peppermint, Khalua, and Matcha are good with dark chocolate. Peppermint and matcha are fantastic with white chocolate.)

4. At least for men, my go-to is always a beard or personal grooming kit. It’s likely something that they wouldn’t buy themselves, and many haven’t felt the exhilaration of a peppermint shampoo. Men deserve a little pampering and self care too!

5. I think mugs make a good last minute gift because they’re available at most stores, pretty cheap for a gift, and will actually be used by the recipient.

6. Socks. High-end, badass, toasty warm (if you live where it gets cold) socks. Smartwool/Darn Tough/etc.. They may “meh” at it early on, but will thank you later. Maybe even very later, but it’ll be appreciated (a lot) eventually.

7. Most people I know don’t have bluetooth hook ups in their car, FM Transmitters are absolutely fantastic, they’re relatively cheap and life changers for folks that like to listen to music while driving, Probably $15 and under.

One of those copper chef/gotham steel type skillets. They’re fantastic, less than $20, endless use.

8. Cookie/brownie mix in a mason jar with instructions on a card and a bow.

Or a visa gift card.

9. Fancy pasta, fancy jarred sauce, nice block of parm cheese, in a serving bowl with a kitchen towel. You can do this as expensively or as cheaply as you want.

I also loved a book called The Fortune Cookie Chronicles by Jennifer 8 Lee (basically, a woman exploring Chinese food in the USA as well as her own Chinese roots, and the history of fortune cookies… really fascinating). She talks a lot about soy sauce in that book, so I’ve given that book with a bottle of “real” soy sauce many times. I love sharing things I love with other people, so that’s a gift I love to give.

10. Subscription box. Like coffee? Subscription box. Board games? Subscription box. Make up? Subscription box. Ties or socks or yarn or hot sauce or tea or beer or wine or Japanese candy or marvel or harry porter or fitness? Subscription mother-fuckin box.

11. Go to the dollar store and grab some over the hand oven mitts, then head to the grocery store and get cake & brownie mixes, hand write the baking directions on a decorated index card or slip of paper. Personalize each one with a message or somesuch. Bam.

12. If it’s someone you’re fairly close to, print out a photo of the two of you and put it in a frame. It feels thoughtful, but can also be done in less than an hour and is cheap.

13. Depends how well I know them, or if I’ve used the same trick before – but it’s probably a cast iron skillet. Costs $20 for a good one (rhymes with dodge), and I always get thanked for it, like a year later.

14. Aldi.

A million calories of chocolate for about twenty quid.

Enough to distribute to everyone.

15. Here is what I do every year.

I go buy gift certificates for my favorite restaurants, and gift cards from Best Buy. I then put them in Christmas cards with no name on them.

I keep some in the house and some in my car.

If someone gives me a gift, I say “Wait a minute, I have something for you too” and go get the card. I quickly write their name on it and hand it to them.

Its worked out perfectly for me for years. I give everyone that gives me something, and if I end up with extra gift certificates or gift cards, I just use them on myself.

16. I make them an elaborate Christmas card with an etymology of their name. It’s always a hit and has more meaning than a gift card.

17. Good pair of headphones.

18. I make very good gingerbread cookies and decorate them very elaborately, like I’ll draw a portrait of them in frosting or I draw a cartoon character they like. Im pretty good at it.

19. Chia pet. So many varieties. ‘Ironic’ gift for those recipients, awesome gift for the others.

Either way you are a hero!

20. Those soft-ass blankets you find in any store around Christmas time. And then I buy one more for me. Every goddamn year

21. For girls: anything from Anthropologie. They have a great gifts and the quality/craftsmanship is decent. That and they gift wrap beautifully for free! I use this for last minute birthday gifts quite often and it always impresses.

For guy: gift cards or booze. Guys appreciate utility.

22. Nail place… Women will go wild over a free mani-pedi.

23. A bottle of their favorite spirits, or for non-drinkers/kids, a book.

24. BOOKS!

There is a book on literally any topic ever.

Fan of Formula 1? Book.

Fan of Jujitsu? Book.

Like economic news? Book.

Porn? Book.

Lonely? Book.

Want to improve yourself? Book.

And you can get books everywhere. Online, in store, thrift stores, little free libraries, everywhere.

25. Houseplants!

I usually have lots of spiderplant babies and keep a few small pots on hand. Great for all occasions.

26. Those Hickory Farms meat and cheese gift boxes.

27. For a family – Get a tin bucket of gourmet holiday popcorn (caramel / chocolate flavored popcorn) to share.

For a dude – Get a bottle of fancy champagne or other booze like whisky or bourbon.

For anyone younger than 30 – Get an Amazon gift card.

For a kid – Give them a $50 dollar bill. They likely never handle money and if they do, the $50 looks so much better than the $20. Easy way to become the cool uncle.

For a girl – Get them a gift certificate to a local salon, a big blanket, or fun warm socks (not regular socks but those nicer holiday woven socks).

For your mom – Get her an ornament that has sentimental value, or, go to the mall (who does that anymore) and get them to hand paint an ornament on the spot with the family name & year on it.

For your dad – Get him NFL or NBA tickets.

28. Things that are consumable… everyone has way too many junk trinkets just because someone felt they had to buy something.

Ground coffee from a local coffee shop (if you know the person has a grinder, get whole bean, but not everyone does). They usually have fun Christmas flavors this time of year.

A bottle of dry wine or champagne.

Nice candles (go for ones that are soy based and have lids) or liquid hand soap.

29. Who wants lottery tickets?!?!?!

30. If we’re talking non-money gifts you know what’s a great go to? TJ Maxx. They are just a hodgepodge of random stuff and they have bailed me out so much when it comes to gift giving because with all the things they have you are bound to find something for everyone.

31. Home made egg nog, Irish cream, or Kahlúa. Most people will love one of the three, they are easy to make, made by hand, affordable, and our gifts that go away.

32. I’d bake a bunch of stuff or make fancy looking caramel apples. If I give people food, they seem to be satisfied.

33. I’ll do a blanket/candle/bottle of wine/nice beer and fudge,

OR a movie/board game and stop by the dollar store for a shower caddy, fill it with popcorn, movie candies, etc if it’s for a family. Do a caddy and filler per family member.

34. Starbucks gift card. Everyone loves Starbucks.

35. Lego. Lego for the nephew, lego for dad, lego for mom, lego for granny, lego for EVERYONE!

36. Spicery subscription for three months. Print out the confirmation and chuck it in an envelope. I’ve gifted this twice and both recipients said that they never wanted any other present from me – just for that subscription to repeat.

37. If it’s last minute, I tried to go to a clothing store I know they have clothes from. Throughout the year I’ll ask “bro, nice jacket, where’d you get it?” Then I remember their spot and get them a gift card.

Then to cover my ass cause some people are weird about gift cards I say “I saw a _____ while shopping but I couldn’t remember your size/didn’t know what color you’d like/etc.”

38. Magazine subscriptions. The New Yorker. Times Literary Supplement. New Scientist. Private Eye. Done them all.

39. Mom – Candles and epsom salts.

Brother – Steam/eShop card, or go to a second hand store and find a game I think he’d like.

Dad – Itunes Gift Card or some kind of sports paraphernalia.

Girlfriend – something that reminds me of her, or that I think she’d love (last Christmas it was a pair of socks that said ,”I’m a delicate fucking flower”).

40. I buy ten copies of the best book I’ve read all year and wrap em in newspaper.

Proof of success: I do this every year

41. A brick of batteries. Everybody needs batteries, nobody will say no to batteries, and they will think of you when they are in a pinch and realize you got them a BRICK of batteries.

Great practical gift.

42. Throw blankets from the 24-hour drugstore. They’re $15 and nice enough that I use them myself. This is also my go-to for any gift swap at the office/with people I don’t know super well.

43. Pictures! Take a picture of something the receiver will like, or find one you might already have, throw it in a cheap frame and WABANG

44. Go to CVS and get a gift card (they have Amazon, iTunes, random others). Swing buy a restaurant and grab a gift card for that place. Last ditch, don’t have time to get a hard copy of a gift card- just buy one online that you can email.

45. Luxury kitchen stuff.

There’s a great kitchen & dinnerware shop within walking distance of my home. I can get pretty dinnerware, flatware, glasses and linens in a range of styles, and they have durable, high quality cookware for the more practically minded people. It’s my go to gift-shop, because everyone eats.

46. Lava Lamp!

No one has one.

They’re 20$

Oh, and it’s neat.

47. I’d bring them all to a restaurant and pay for their meal-> easy way to make a party and present at the same time without having to worry about what to buy them since they can order themselves what they want

48. Pharmacies always have cheap last minute crap like travel manicure kits and hot sauce samplers.

49. You get a box of chocolate! You get a box of chocolate! And you get a box of chocolate! Everyone gets a box of chocolate!!!

50. Cash, candy, and/or alcohol.

0

Image Credit: Anthony Tran

is cataloged in Last Minute Gifts, Presents

What if kindness was cool?

What if you could live a life that would make YOU jealous? What if you could make just one person’s day better with a few simple words of encouragement?  is a book of inspirational words that will keep you fighting and ask you never to give up on life, yourself, or others. Open a page to start your day, frame a page that inspires you to keep living, share a page with a friend who needs support, or leave one behind for a complete stranger to brighten their day.

Join The Kindness Revolution

from All Of Beer http://allofbeer.com/50-thoughtful-last-minute-christmas-gifts-for-procrastinators/

[kamechameleon]

Ranma 1/2 but talking to cameras behind the scenes - a fanfic, pt. 1?

It was just another day at the Tendo house until the head of the household, Soun Tendo received a letter in the mail. It was from his long time friend Genma Saotome announcing that he would be coming to visit. Soun had been waiting a long time for this letter and jumped up to go call his three daughter. Kasumi and Nabiki were both puzzled as to why their father was so excited, he normally seemed a bit depressed.

Kasumi: I thought he had finally gotten some customers at the dojo. It's a bit of an embarrassment to have a dojo that no one wants to train in. Might have done good for his self esteem.

Nabiki: I was hoping we won the lottery or something. He certainly looked like he just won the lottery.

Unfortunately his youngest daughter Akane was nowhere to be found. Soun really wanted to speak to all three of his daughters at once, but he was so excited he could hardly contain himself. So he told his other two daughter the news, one of them was to be engaged to his friends son to carry on the Tendo dojo. Kasumi and Nabiki kind of stared at him for a good 30 seconds as if they were trying to discern whether he really did just say that. They then said in unison, “we'll think about it.”

Soun: I was scared there for a moment, I thought an argument would break out. It certainly looked like Nabiki was giving me the death gaze. Honestly it could have went a lot worse.

Kasumi: Arranged marriage, that's so old fashioned. I would rather pick for myself. But I didn't want to disappoint my father by dismissing things too quickly. It's rare to see him that happy.

Nabiki: I wasn't crazy about the idea, but I didn't want to completely knock it yet. The guy could have ended up being decent for all I knew.

The awkward silence was soon broken by a loud announcement, “I'm home.” Akane was back, Soun wasn't sure whether to be relieved or very frightened. He sent Nabiki to go get Akane, just to be on the cautious side. He sat there for a good five minutes, wondering what was taking them so long. Finally Nabiki entered with Akane. Nabiki had an evil grin on her face, while Akane was looking rather puzzled. Soun quickly choked out the news unable to keep his cool. Akane was fucking pissed and quickly went into a rant about how Soun shouldn't be meddling their their lives like that.

Akane: I don't normally like to yell at my dad like that, but someone had to say it. It's not as if my sisters were going to do it. I bet they were deliberately waiting for me to be the one to say it, make me look like the bad daughter. They certainly started to agree with me once I started chewing him out.

Nabiki eventually managed to diffuse the uncomfortable situation by asking more about their future fiancé. Soun preceded to tell them all about Genma's son Ranma's extensive martial arts training and their trip to China. He was feeling a little more calm now, it even seemed like Nabiki was interested in hearing about Ranma, and it was normally pretty difficult to get her attention. Akane however still looked really angry at him. Nabiki and Kasumi started to ask some more questions about Ranma. Soun got a bit nervous and admitted he had never actually met Ranma. Kasumi and Nabiki's faces quickly started to match Akane's. Fortunately the precocious situation situation was interrupted by some yelling at the door.

Soun and Nabiki quickly rushed to the door. At the door there was giant panda carrying a person. The they rushed back because who wouldn't freak out if they saw a giant panda at their door. The panda chased after them into the living room. The person whom the panda was carrying broke free and performed a swift divekick into the panda's face. The whole situation was total PANDA-monium. The whole Tendo family thought they were tripping pokeballs.

Soun's daughter were not amused. Kasumi and Nabiki are all like, “what the fuck is with this panda, did you hang around the zoo a lot back in the day” The person then introduced himself as Ranma Saotome and the mood of the room whiplashed yet again. Soun rushed to give him hug. After a split-second he realized there were some strange growths on Ranma's chest. He took a quick feel again to make sure he wasn't imagining things. He then realized, he wasn't crazy, Ranma was a girl. Nabiki, noticing the situation decided to get in on some of the action herself and started to get pretty gropey with Ranma's chest before she started to get frustrated and asked her to stop. At the same time, Soun passed out from shock. And the other two Tendo daughter rushed to attend to him.

Nabiki: Hey she was really hot. Probably not fiancé material, but definitely easy on the eyes and I am kind of a sucker for redheads.

After a few minutes Soun regained consciousness. Kasumi was quite understanding and tried to cheer her father up. Nabiki on the other hand grilled his ass like Strickland Propane, mocking him for not knowing Ranma was a girl all while continuing to grope Ranma further, much to his dismay. Akane finally got fed up with all the bullshit and told her to knock that shit off. She was relieved that there turned out to be no fiancé and felt a like celebrating with a good workout. She even invited Ranma along in hopes of making a new friend.

An hour after the daughter had cleared the living room, Nabiki walked by to find her dad sitting around with some bald dude with glasses. She continued on her way to the kitchen only for it to hit her a few seconds later, “who was that guy?” When she got into the kitchen she decided to ask Kasumi. “Beets me.” Kasumi said. Kasumi then walked on over to the dojo to tell Ranma the bath was ready before going to meet Nabiki in the living room to find out who the bald guy was.

And just five minutes later the whole neighborhood could hear Akane scream. Kasumi spilled tea all over herself and Soun nearly pissed his pants. Akane then bursts through the living room, runs outside and pulls a giant stone thingamajig out of the ground, ranting about killing a pervert in bathroom like some sort of overzealous street preacher. Then Nabiki was all like, “what the fuck's yer deal sis.” and Akane was all like “creeper in the bathroom” then Nabiki was all like “so trash his ass” and Akane was all like “I am too freaked to touch that freak with my bear hands”.

Nabiki: Sometime Akane freaks out like a psycho, but never that much. It was hilarious.

Kasumi: Hell yeah it was hilarious! Never change Akane.

A stranger then walked into the room and and Kasumi and Nabiki were all like, who is this guy? And the dude said Ranma Saotome and all three daughters looked like they they finished the first episode of Galaxy Fraulein Yuna. Soun then introduced the bald guy as Genma Saotome. Then things got into exposition territory, blah blah, training in China, blah, blah, cursed spring, blah, blah water transformations, you probably know the story already.

After the story Ranma and Genma broke out into a fight both eventually ending up in the pond and having their transformations triggered. The Kasumi called Genma out out on his shit.”What the hell were you thinking Mr. Saotome!” And then Genma's panda paws pull out a Chinese guidebooks. Kasumi responded, “so you can't read Chinese?” and the pulled out a sign from out of nowhere saying Bingo! “Really” Kasumi muttered under her breath, with that “you're a total dumbass” look on her face.  Soun then poured hot water on the Saotomes and said, “no problem then,” and introduces his daughters to Ranma. “So who tickles your fancy” he asks. But before Ranma has a chance to answer Kasumi and Nabiki volunteer Akane to be Ranma's fiancee, claiming she is clearly the best fit for a guy who is half girl.

Akane: I can't believe those bitches set me up like that. That was really low even for Nabiki. And I can't believe Kasumi would ever do something like that.

Nabiki: I was thinking Akane's totally a lesbian, why give her a little nudge out of her closet by setting her up with a hot girl. I was doing her a favor.

Kasumi: I was just joking at first, but when I saw Nabiki thought so as well, I just kind of jumped on noard the Rakane ship.

Akane then burst out in opposition yelling that she'd never date a perv like that. Ranma then expressed his dissatisfaction with the arranged by acting like a total drama queen and yelling that he was going back to China. But on his way out he had to open his big mouth, and say he was totally hotter than Akane anyway. A split-second later he was out out on the floor and Akane had the table firmly in her hands. She smacked him upside the head from behind just like in pro wrestling. Nobody told her not to imitate what you see on TV growing up.

A half hour later Ranma woke up to see Kasumi and Nabiki tending to him. Kasumi assured him that Akane was actually really nice when she wasn’t being a violent psychopath, while Nabiki cracked a smile at Kasumi's joke, which was totally inappropriate for the situation.

And then just another twenty minutes later another scream from the bathroom. Akane kicked Ranma's ass again for another bathroom misunderstanding. Why don't the Tendo's have some way of knowing the bathroom is occupied? After the incident Nabiki was all talking to Akane about it. “Come on I know you enjoyed getting a peak at Ranma's smokin' hot girl body” said Nabiki. And Akane was all, “No way.” And Nabiki was all, “come on you don't need to hide in the closet, me and Kasumi both know you're a lesbian, dad won't care he loves you just the same.” And Akane then retorted, “for the hundredth time I am not a lesbian, what is with you. I am going to bed, I've had enough bullshit today“ and stormed off. Kasumi then came over and, gave Nabiki a smile and said, “I think things are going to get a lot more interesting around here Nabiki.” To which Nabiki replied, “they sure are Kasumi, they sure are.”