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marjansmarwani · 3 years ago

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It feels like an out of body experience

2k || ao3

“He was talking to both of us,” he repeated, aware that he sounded like a broken record. “Both me and Gabriel. He was going to take what was most important, from both of us.” --- Just a missing 2x12 scene of the moment after Owen realized TK and Carlos were in danger and what follows. Featuring an in-depth look at his guilt because why else do I ever write Owen Strand anymore?

This has been sitting mostly done on my google drive since May and I finally decided to finish it today, for some reason so I hope you’re all in the mood for some angsty Owen content.

Beta’d by my loves @silvarafael and @justaswampdemon

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“You thought he was talking to you?” Billy asked with a snort. “I thought he was talking to Reyes.”

Judd let out a laugh beside him and Owen rolled his eyes, picking up his glass to take another sip of the whiskey. He rolled Billy’s words around in his head as he twirled the glass, watching as the whiskey sloshed around the sides. The thought came suddenly and hit him with all the force of a steam engine.

“He was talking to both of us,” he said quietly, pulling Judd’s attention to him. He could see the other man frowning but he ignored him. He couldn’t believe he hadn’t seen it sooner; he couldn’t believe it hadn’t been his first thought.

“He was talking to both of us,” he repeated louder, now pulling the eyes of all the others to him as well. Tommy sat up straighter as she clocked the fear in his eyes.

“What are you saying?” she asked evenly, using her steady, tempered captain’s voice that he had heard so often on patients in the field.

“He was talking to both of us,” he repeated, aware that he sounded like a broken record. “Both me and Gabriel. He was going to take what was most important, from both of us.”

His words hung in the air for a moment as they all processed and began to connect the dots. Owen set down his glass as they did, his hands were shaking too much to hold it. He was already reaching into his pocket for his phone when Judd’s expression cleared and he let out a curse as he figured out what Owen was implying, but he didn’t have the focus to see anything but the phone in his hands.

Billy still hadn’t figured it out though so Owen spelled it out for him as the phone now clutched to his ear rang: “Our sons. He meant our sons, who live together. He meant TK and Carlos. He rigged their house to burn too.”

There were horrified looks all around now but Owen couldn’t focus on them. The fear coursing through his veins was too all-consuming; there wasn’t room for anything else.

The ringing stopped and for a split second, Owen thought that maybe, just maybe he was in luck, that TK had finally answered. But his voicemail answered instead at the tail end of the moment and Owen could feel some of the hope he had managed to cling to slip away.

The others were watching him intently and he knew that the fear was written all over his face. Grace was the first to speak, breaking the tense silence.

“You all need to go.”

They all turned to her and Judd opened his mouth but she shook her head, “Those boys need you. With the 126 closed, there isn’t a house close enough to get to them in time. But you’re close here. I’ll call it in to dispatch, and pray a whole lot.”

Owen nodded, already standing with Judd on his heels. The younger man paused for all of a moment, turning back to his wife who only shook her head.

“TK and Carlos need you right now Judd, I’ll be fine. Just be careful, and call me when you’re done.”

Judd nodded and leaned forward to give her a quick kiss, “I love you, Gracie.”

“I love you too, now go!”

Owen didn’t need to be told twice. He was already halfway out the door before Grace even finished speaking. He jumped into his truck and was momentarily surprised when the passenger door swung open beside him. He turned, hand frozen over the ignition to see Billy climbing in beside him. The other man took a look at him and scoffed.

“Well, what are you waiting for, New York? We’ve gotta go.”

So Owen started the truck and sped away from the curb because Billy was right. TK was in danger and nothing else mattered.

He pressed the speed limit the entire way from the Ryder’s house to the condo. It wasn’t far and Owen was making excellent time as it was, but that fact did nothing to quell the racing of his heart. He can’t believe he hadn’t thought of it before. What kind of father was he that when he was told that someone was going to take what was most important to him and he didn’t immediately think of his son?

If they were too late and the worst did happen, how did he live with himself?

Billy had the scanner app running beside him, and the sound of his son’s address being relayed by dispatch sent an entirely different chill through him. It made it real, hearing the words outside of his own head. All the while his phone rang between them until TK’s voicemail picked up again and Owen swore. He took a breath and tried to let logic in. Maybe Raymond was just trying to scare them; rigging two places to burn might have taken more time than he had. Maybe they weren’t home, maybe they had decided to go out after everything that had happened today. Maybe they had been able to get out at the first signs — TK had been a firefighter, after all. He would have noticed, he would have known how to safely get them both out. He...

His conjecture broke off sharply as they finally reached their destination and Owen suddenly found that he couldn’t breathe.

There were flames already eating through the first story, their ominous glow cutting through the night. Owen knew in his gut he had been right but seeing it stoked an entirely new fear within him. TK was in there. Carlos was in there. He needed to get them out.

He moved towards the structure but suddenly there were hands on him, pulling him back. He rounded on the hands holding him, ready to fight back only to be met with Judd’s unimpressed gaze.

“Running in there half-cocked and getting yourself hurt isn’t going to help them,” he told him, pressing an AFD t-shirt into his hands. “Cover up your face and let me grab the extinguishers, then we’ll go in.”

Owen followed his instructions without much thought, his shaking hands moving on autopilot to fasten the shirt around his face. His gaze never left the flaming structure before him, his chest aching with the knowledge that his son was trapped in there. It wasn’t long before a fire extinguisher was pressed into his hand by Judd, but it felt like an eternity as he watched the flames grow ever higher. He felt as if he were in those flames himself, the fear and guilt eating away inside of him with every passing breath that he got to take that his son might not.

And then they were moving, bursting through the front door and attacking the flames with their extinguishers. Owen barely took a moment to survey the downstairs — to see the familiar living space charred and destroyed — before he led the way up the stairs to the bedroom, Billy on his heels. The sound of breaking glass had him running faster and he burst through the door to feel his heart jump into his throat at the sight of Carlos preparing himself to jump out of a second-floor window, TK a step behind him.

He shouted at them to follow him as Billy did his best to quell the flames that threatened to stop them. But Owen knew they wouldn’t because he wouldn’t be deterred. Now that he had the boys in his sight, he wasn’t about to leave here without them; no matter what.

They both turned and looked at him in shock and he can only imagine how little sense this all must make. But then TK was pulling Carlos towards them and then they were out of the room and down the stairs

He noted the hand that TK kept on Carlos as he stepped in front of them and wondered how much of it was his training and how much of it was the need to know that he was still with him. It was an instinct he understood, as he led the way and did his best to clear their path with the one fire extinguisher he had. He could hear them behind him but he was almost afraid to turn around, as if somehow if he looked back they would be gone; a modern-day Orpheus giving into his doubt and losing it all. So he focused instead on the flames, on finding the next step. On the way forward.

His mind had almost started to wander again — pondering the terrors and what-ifs even now — but a piece of the ceiling falling to the ground before him interrupted that spiral, wrenching him back to reality. Being surrounded by fire on all sides without a stitch of gear was unlike anything else and he bit back a cry as some of the smoldering debris landed on his arm. But he pushed on because TK and Carlos were behind him and that was all that mattered. He could weather any amount of pain as long as the boys were safe.

Finally, they burst through what remained of the front door, and before he even paused to take a breath he turned on his heel to make sure that they were behind him, that he hadn’t failed even more than he already had.

But there they were, hunched over on their front lawn; taking heaving breaths of fresh air and coughing out the remnants of smoke still trapped in their lungs.

Distantly Owen heard the sound of footsteps behind him and Tommy ran to join them and of shouts as Judd and Billy spilled out of the front door. Tommy gave him a quick look before making a beeline for the boys, reaching out for TK who shook his head and nodded towards Carlos. Her expression softened ever so slightly as she reached out a hand for Carlos, guiding him (and therefore TK too) further away from the flames still eating through the darkness of the night sky.

Owen watched them go as Judd appeared at his side, following his gaze before glancing down at Owen’s sleeve.

“Those could be some nasty burns, Cap,” he observed. “You should get those checked out.”

Even as he said the words the 129 was piling out of their truck and the captain was calling out orders. Owen watched them go but knew with a sinking heart that the damage had already been done in so many ways. He shook his head at Judd a moment later, “They’ll keep.”

Judd opened his mouth to argue but trailed off when he followed Owen’s gaze back to where TK and Carlos were now getting checked out by the paramedics, Tommy hovering at the edge. His expression turned sad at the sight of Carlos hunched over and TK wrapped around him, running a soothing hand up and down his arm even as his mouth moved in what were likely soft reassurances.

“Do you think he’ll ever forgive me Judd?” he heard himself ask, and he wasn’t surprised when the other man looked at him sharply.

“Who?” he asked, “TK?” He started to speak but then stopped as he glanced back over his shoulder at the home that was crumbling to soggy ashes behind them. His eyes turned back to the couple currently seeking solace in each other in the back of an ambulance before he sighed: “Yeah, he will. He’s good like that. It’s just gonna take some time.”

Owen nodded his agreement but kept his mouth shut so what he was really thinking didn’t slip through. Maybe, he thought, forgiveness isn’t even what he is looking for. Forgiving could be easy and TK had perfected the art over the course of his life. He knew his son loved him, but love didn’t always mean the same as trust. Trust was something else entirely and Owen couldn’t help but wonder how long it would be before his son ever put his trust in him again.

#911 lone star #911 lone star fic #my writing #oh look another 2x12 coda #userkimmy #userjilly #userac #userbones #usermaximus #tuserpaige #reyesstrand #reyeslonestartag

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ray-ray-writings · 4 years ago

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700 Friend Behind the Scene Special!

Hello there! So a little bit of back story, everything I write is written in a google doc because it automatically saves everything and I can think clearer when I’m typing in a document. Sometimes when I’m writing, I’ll get tired or get stuck or write something I don’t like. So I’ll make a note to myself of what I was writing so I can come back to it later, or write out the basic idea of what I want to happen so I can visualize it in words better, or hit enter a few times and re-write somethings. So in celebration of me hitting 700 friends I have gathered a few of those things so that I can share with you a little bit of my thought process, but also so you might have a laugh or may see where some of your favorite stories almost went. I don’t know if any of you will actually like this or actually care, but I thought that it was something cool lol. So here you go! I hope you enjoy!!!

Notes to Self/Prompts to Myself

A Dedicated and Domesticated Pig: *Note to future self so I know what I was going for. He’s making breakfast with your child on your hip. I’m thinking a daughter named something with Phil’s name maybe or maybe just a T name. Then you two are leaving for a festival in L’Manberg where Philza interacts with your daughter. And the night ends with you three cuddled up together and you’re reminiscing on how he asked you out and then it all comes full circle somehow using the words dedicated because we’re that kind of simp*

Gift of Friendship: Techno- “I made friendship bracelets”. “I don’t wear jewelry” “oh okay. I can take it back. You don’t have to wear it I’ll take it back-“ “no I will wear this until the day I die

Notes in general: There are a lot of *Insert title here* or *Insert really cool and creative title here*

There is also a lot of *Insert really nice summary here that sums everything up but is also clever*

Actually Pretty Funny: I knew I wanted to use “Tommy leave me alone” “Tommy told me you were in here crying” “That little snitch” but I didn’t know where so I made a note to use it.

What Could Have Been or Almost Was

This has a few pieces of writing but is mostly about what I almost titled the pieces you know and love.

Stolen Goods: I was about to retort but the sound of the nether portal activating cut my words off.

“We’re back!” I heard my younger brother call out. Techno and I walked together toward the portal to greet our brothers, but they weren’t alone. “Hey guys! Oh hey Dream,” I greeted the three, setting my chest down next to the wood I brought in earlier. “Hey Y/N/N? Get what we asked for?” Tommy asked, walking toward me. I simply stared at him and then looked at the pile of wood beside me. “No” I deadpanned.

I then turned to my chest and quickly put my axe away. “Then what’s that?” Tommy questioned in confusion. I rolled my eyes, closed my chest and turned to him. “What you asked for dummy” “But you just said no?” “I was being sarcastic!” I exclaimed, moving toward him and slightly pushing him. “Well I didn’t know that!” Tommy exclaimed, pushing me back. “Hey! Hey! Hey! Stop pushing each other.” Wilbur demanded, “Just say thank you and move on Tommy.” Tommy huffed but said, “Thank you Y/N.” “You’re welcome Tommy.”

“So is this how you four interact all the time?” Dream questioned, moving closer to the two of us. I let out a laugh and turned to the masked man, “Yeah. Pretty much. Sometimes we get along, but sometimes they get on my nerves.” I informed the man, while playfully glaring at

A Hairy Situation: I had a lot of trouble coming up with a cool title for “a Hairy Situation” . It almost was like “Braided Together” or something like that but I was like, it’s about hair. It’s a situation. It’s a Hairy Situation.

Either Lean on Me or 3am conversation I don’t remember: Tommy did something. He did something bad” Tubbo admitted. I nodded to show the young man I was listening to, “Okay,” I prompted. “Tommy was messing around and he accidentally set George’s house on fire.” My eyes widened at Tubbo’s words. “His new house?” I asked in disbelief. Tubbo nodded, staring into his cup. “Dream is pissed.” He continued. “He gave me an ultimatum. He said that either we go to war or…” Tubbo’s words died on his tongue. “Or what?” I asked, attempting to gently prompt the boy. “What’s the other option Tubbo?” “Or exile Tommy.” His words hit me like a ton of bricks.

Missing You: This fic was almost titled “Radio silence” and was almost irl and was about the day that he got that prank pulled on him where everyone in his Discord was muted and not talking to him. And I almost wrote it so you’re in that call and you are participating in the prank and he just guilt trips you so hard that you unmute and are like “I’m so sorry!”

Better Than a Dedicated Chicken was almost titled “A Funtime Festival”. But then I was like, ‘I hate that. Since it’s a sequel I want to keep a theme… Maybe something about dedication.’ and thus this was born.

Faking Happy- I almost left it on the sad ending where Sam flies away using his trident and you collapse and sob by yourself in the rain. And then I added more to it because I was sad.

Protect You was almost titled “Looking out for you” but I thought that might be too clunky and so I shorten it and stuff.

Wither or Not almost ended without the whole ‘techno goes to your house to comfort you’ scene at the end and almost ended in angst, but I was too sad to do that because I knew the next Techno piece I was writing was going to end in angst.

Not Your Fault almost was going to be a different story completely than what it became. I thought a lot about how to do it but the ways I wanted to write it and the way the anon who requested it probably wanted it but I couldn’t make the prompts fit well in the way I wanted to write it. I thought about having you be on a bridge drinking alone because you had to exile your brothers and Schlatt approaches you there and you’re like “leave me alone. I hate you” and he’s like “no you don’t” and it’s a bit angsty, but then I couldn’t figure out how to fit “I had to see you again in that”. And then I thought about having him exile you and come and see you with a “I had to see you again” but then he would know where pogtopia is and we can’t have that. So then I thought maybe you’d visit him before he gets killed but then I couldn’t figure out how to fit the prompts that way either. So I finally settled on what it became.

Chat’s a Snitch was almost titled “My New Boyfriend’s a Songwriter” and instead of being in established relationship, him seeing you sing his song would be how you two meet and he would fall in love with you and write you a song, but then that wouldn’t have really been what the request was and I didn’t want to deviate that much from the request and I think I was feeling a bit lazy that day so I wrote what it is.

Defending Family was another one I had a hard time coming up with a cool and clever title for. At one point I considered titling it “i will physically fight you”

Crossed Lines was almost called “Hold tight” because I had this idea that maybe when Dream kidnapped you he put you somewhere high and at once point you dangle over the edge, about to fall and so they scream ‘hold tight’ and yeah. I decided not to though because I wasn’t sure how I would go about putting the reader there and getting them down. But once I wrote it due to the amount of times I said “that’s crossing a line” I decided to title it crossed lines. I think this piece is actually one of my least favorites because I’m not sure if I liked how it turned out but idk man.

Totem Troubles was almost called “To Hell and Back” because in the request they wanted me to include hints of the story of Orpheus and Euridice but when I was unable to do that, I had to come up with a new title and I really had a hard time with that.

The Next Step was almost called “Come Live with Me” because I loved the musical ‘Hadestown’. At first I wanted that particular imagine to have more Techno/reader scenes, but then I had a hard time figuring out how to bring up the things and then it felt too short. Then I was like “What if he just talks to Phil about it” and boom it was written. I’m still a huge musical nerd so I titled it “The Next Step” because in a Beetlejuice song two of the main characters are thinking of making a huge step in their relationship and that line is repeated over and over so I stole it…. :). Also for this one I had to literally just take a step back and write out a full ass summary because I was having really really bad writer’s block because I had no idea what I was doing. Unfortunately I don’t have that, I wish I did because it was really funny because it was a summary of the story but it was like “And so Philza’s like bro. Dude. Just tell them” and then Techno’s like “No dad. Stay out of my business” and Philza’s like “Bro. Look around at your house. You love them”

Warming Up didn’t become the title of that piece until the very end. When I read requests I always give them a ‘working title’ that may or may no become the real title when they’re finished and ready to be posted. This one however had a title that was just a joke for myself. It was titled “The Weasel” because Y/N was weaseling her way into Techno’s home and then later his heart.

Calling Philza Dad Drabble: When you greet him though, you always greet him with a hug usually calling out from the door way, “Dad! I’m home!” Very cheesy like. And he comes around the corner and you two hug. And then after you hug, you are like “I missed you!!!” to Phil. And Phil touches his heart and is like, “That’s so nice to hear.

So you usually come over everyday. Everyday when you come over, you always shout out, “Dad! I’m home!” And he rushes out but there are days you don’t and so the next time you d

There was a time though that you had to go out of town for like a week and so you didn’t come over at all and both Techno and Philza found themselves missing you. So the day comes where you get home and you come barreling in the door. You can see Philza in the kitchen cooking something and he quickly turns to the door in shock. You simply grin at him and shout, “DAD! I’M HOME!!!” And he immediately rushed out of the kitchen and pulls you into a great big, warm hug which you instantly returned. “I missed you so so so much!” You announced as you squeeze him tightly.

Warming up working description: Y/N is dying in the snow and Philza’s like “We gotta save them!” and Techno’s like “Why is that our problem?” but helps anyway and then falls in love with Y/N…. Ya know, cliches and shit

I hope you enjoyed reading this monstrosity! Would this be something you guys are interested in seeing? Like a behind the scenes version of my writing. Like I save things like this when I write them and when I have a good chuck I post them? Up to you guys, let me know!

#mcyt #mcyt imagine #what could have been #what almost was #ray rambles #700 friend special #behind the scene #behind the scenes #ray #ray ray writings #ray is so thankful for her amazing friends #that's you #you're their friend #<3

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joyfulsongbird · 5 years ago

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“Eurydice finds out she's pregnant after going to hadestown and Persephone makes hades let her go back to Orpheus.”

🦥 anon, it wouldn’t let me post it as a reply to an ask so here we go: I meant this to be short but 5000+ words burst from my fingertips so here you go.

I had to change it slightly so that Eurydice has the baby BEFORE Seph gets back (assuming she’s about one to two months pregnant, which wouldn’t be showing yet, when she goes to hadestown) cause Seph leaves and doesn’t come back for six months.

***

work, work, work

constant, pulling, weight on her shoulders, never ending

gods, she’s tired

so tired

she’s never been this tired before

will it ever end?

la la la la la la la

two voices, so many souls. her mouth is closed and she’s screaming, echoing, crying.

and then the bell, the signal that this is not never ending. that work doesn’t last to the end of time, that Hadestown has some mercy for it’s workers. for the people who cry at the foot of the wall every day, except now they are tearing it down. and they cry, they cry, they cry for all of the blood and sweat that went into building and now their tears sink into the mortar, slowly tearing down what they dedicated their life to. what they believed would save them from poverty. and now mister Hades, every morning, reminds them that the wall must come down. that someday, they will see the sunshine again. he doesn’t speak in that hopeful tone, of course not, but Eurydice hears it.

she hears it and hopes. she hears that he is reaching for them with this withered outstretched hand that hasn’t known mercy for so long, and she’s taking it. and saying “this is what it’s like to be merciful”.

look me in the eyes and see what it is to forgive.

for she knows forgiveness like the back of her hand. she knows forgiveness like the deepness of his eyes. knows forgiveness like that the pit of hunger in her stomach. she knows forgiveness. he does not. she can teach him, she can teach him. teach them. It’s only been about two or three months since Persephone went back for spring, it could be longer than that, could be shorter. what is time in Hadestown? there is only the toll and the wall and the crumbling of what they lived for.

she drops her hands to her sides, still coated in grime, her body aching to stretch her hands towards the sky (well, what they call the sky, it isn’t that, it is red and dark and unforgiving). it’s under her fingernails, it’s in her hair, it’s on her cheeks. she is a full fledged creature, with mud on her body like camouflage. she is a machine, work, move, clean, again. what is cleanliness if you are just going to get dirty again tomorrow?

and what is germs in Hadestown? there is no sickness here. that’s what they were promised. a warm place of wealth and no pain. they don’t get sick, they don’t get cold, they don’t go hungry. that’s what was promised to them. but she can’t feel anymore. yes, now she can remember his face, remember his voice, but now... now she feels nothing when she sees his face.

it’s definitely worse.

it’s like she’s looking at the face of a boy she saw in passing on the street. she knows that she loved him, that she still loves him. but there is nothing in her memories that twinges her feelings back into what they were. she sees everything through her own gaze, she knows that at some point she felt these emotions that were so extreme that she cried real tears, that she laughed with this joyousness that filled the entire room. she remembers how he looked at her. with reverence. with love. how he smiled every time she entered a room, and she smiled too. she knows that she smiled too, she remembers that.

she goes through her routines, goes to her shared apartment flat with two other women. they never really speak, they don’t even make eye contact most of time. Eurydice just taps her foot against the floor, waiting for her turn in the shower. directly across the wall, one of her roommates, Afra, stands there. doing the same thing; waiting, listening, all impatiently. Eurydice doesn’t know her well, doesn’t know how she got here but she assumes they all came for the same reasons. security. safety. or maybe, just to get away. Eurydice is sure that if she’d known about Hadestown when she was a younger girl, living in a home with people she loathed, with people who loathed her, she would’ve flown off to hadestown long ago.

Eurydice gets the shower next, stepping into the already steamy small room with the tub and rusty shower head against the wall. the mirror is fogged up and Eurydice leaves it that way, there’s no need to see herself this way. there’s no need to see herself at all. what’s the point down here? who needs mirrors in hell?

shedding her outer layers, she steps right into the shower, watching as the water below fills with dirt and grime, turning it a muted gray color, she stands there until the water turns clear again. she scrubs aimlessly at her skin with the soap bar for a minute or two, trying to feel clean but the dirt stays no matter what she does. it’s under her nails. it’s in her hair. it’s under her skin. she’ll never be rid of it. she’ll never get rid of-

she doubles over in the shower, the dizziness catching her off guard.

“woah, okay.” she murmurs to herself, reaching to clutch the slippery edge of the tub, steadying herself. it passes after a brief ten seconds but she steps out of the shower after that, turning off the water for fear of falling and hitting her head. she knows, objectively, that she can’t really be hurt here in Hadestown but old habits die hard.

dressing slowly and carefully, she addresses the main problem here is that both her head and her stomach are killing her.

well actually the largest looming problem here is: you don’t get sick in Hadestown.

Oh gods, does she have to be the anomaly here?

she’d like to just be normal, just blend into the crowd, but no, she has to be different. she has to stick out like a sore thumb in every place.

before she even knows what’s going on, she’s thrown up what little she’d eaten that day. it makes her feel a little better but sweat makes her forehead sticky, her whole body feels shaky and not quite right.

“Eurydice?” Afra’s voice is unsure of itself, they don’t often use their voices down here. “everything okay in there?”

“yes.” Eurydice calls back. “I’m fine.”

Is she?

she feels something for the first time in awhile: fear.

***

it was all very simple, she should’ve added it up the first time she threw up, so long ago. but it isn’t until she looks in a long mirror for the first time, wearing only her underclothes that she notices something.

no.

gods, no.

she doesn’t make an appointment with Hades, like he says you’re supposed to when you need to speak with him. this is too important, this is too much of his own fault that she has to speak him right then. she wants to cry, she needs to cry but she can’t. so she runs, so she runs as fast as she can until she’s at the doorsteps of the dark building where she knows he resides almost all of the hours of the day.

the door is unlocked, surprisingly, and she just walks in. down dark halls, ignoring the shadows that paint fear across her body. that’s the one thing she can feel nowadays, fear for herself, fear for Orpheus, fear for everything, for their unborn child. no child has been born in Hadestown to her knowledge, a desolate place like this cannot sustain a new life like that. it sucks life away, it tears families apart.

it’s relatively easy to find his office, it’s the only room that’s doorknob isn’t coated with dust and the door is slightly ajar, letting stark light stream into the dark hall.

she bursts inside before she even has time for a second thought.

he’s at his desk, pen in hand, paper in the other. his eyes raise to hers the moment he notices her presence.

“miss Eurydice-”

“cut the bullshit, Hades, why am I still here?”

“I-” she holds up her hand, cutting him off somehow. such an impressive, looming presence usually, but when a women on a mission is in front of him, he never knows what to do. she starts pacing back and forth, in front of his desk. clenching and unclenching her fists. should she punch him? no, no, nothing like that. she didn’t come here for violence... why did she come here? what was her mission when she set out to come here? she doesn’t know, she just knew that she had to get here.

“I thought I’d just be able to live my life in peace. In complete solidarity. That’s what you promised me. you told me I’d get- you said I’d be good here.”

“and didn’t I deliver?” he said, his rumbling voice carrying through the office. across the desk that was separating them. “aren’t you at peace?

she felt something lodged in her throat, she tries to swallow it but the effort makes her voice come out choked. “not anymore.”

suddenly, she feels everywhere. suddenly, she’s so full of feeling her knees nearly crumple to the ground. leaning against the desk. she still doesn’t cry. no, there’s almost too much feeling for that. her whole body is overwhelmed, for so long she felt nothing that this sudden feeling is almost causing her to double over in the pain. it’s fiercely coursing through her veins, her shaking knees could be from the fear or the feeling, she can’t tell.

Hades is up and holding onto one of her arms, his touch surprisingly gentle and uninvasive. he keeps her steady, while guiding her to come sit on a couch on the side of the wall.

“sit here.” he says, his voice shockingly calm and... kind. “I’ll get a glass of water.”

he busies himself with a pitcher of water that sits on his desk, and an empty glass beside it. Eurydice fiddles with the rings on her fingers, trying to sort her mind out, trying to figure out how to say it.

he’s pouring a glass of water. for her.

“I’m pregnant.”

he stops pouring.

he doesn’t turn around either. “your boy...”

“It’s Orpheus’, I’m positive.”

“how long?”

“I only just realized today. I didn’t know who to tell, Lady Persephone is gone and I just don’t know what I’m going to do.”

he’s being surprisingly calm, for a man with no children and no real relationship with Eurydice besides one layered with negative emotions.

“you don’t work for the time being.” he says after a moment of consideration. he turns around, holding a glass of water in one of his hands to face Eurydice’s gaping face. “I need to speak with my wife, but that can’t happen for another few months. So you don’t work and keep busy within what’s left of the walls.”

“what am I supposed to do? for those four months?” she has no idea when she’ll be due, the uncertainty of it is making her feel shaky. the fear strikes her again and she turns her to the side, not making eye contact with Hades again for fear of crumpling in on herself again. she purses her lips.

“I can tell you’re scared,” he begins.

“I’m not-” she starts.

“you younglings always try to convince everyone else that you aren’t terrified,” he thrusts the glass of water into her hand, giving her a pointed look.

“like you’re one to talk.”

he sighs. “only you could sass me when I’m trying to help you.” embarrassment faintly paints Eurydice’s cheeks a blush color, but it fades quickly. “let me continue.

“I can tell you’re scared,” he repeats. “but I’ll promise to protect you and your child, I may be a lot of terrible things but one thing I will never do is force a mother and her child apart. you’ll go back to your apartment and get some rest, tell your roommates that you don’t need to get up for work tomorrow, by special permission of Hades, and I’ll try to get in contact with my wife. But I have a feeling we won’t be able to have a full discussion until she gets back from summertime.”

Eurydice nods and takes a couple sips from that glass of water, her hand shakes so much, she knows that if there was ice in the glass they’d be able to hear the clinking of the two solids. but for now, she tries to act like she isn’t slowly crashing and burning.

Orpheus

Orpheus, you have a child

and he doesn’t know it. he may never know it.

“my child will be doomed to this life, won’t they?” she whispers, eyes downcast. “if-if I give them to Persephone before spring, will they be able to go Up Top? would it be possible?”

he sighs, the sound is burdened. “I don’t know. A child has never been born here before, so I don’t know.”

she stares at the surface of the water, rippling with little currents and waves from her trembling hand. “they will never know grass, or happiness, or love-”

“no.” Hades says firmly, he steps closer, he brushes her knuckles with his fingertips, unsure of what to do as a comfort. but his words are comfort enough. “your child will know love, you will love them and that is love enough.”

she purses her lips tight together, she still does not cry, she still has yet to cross that threshold of pure feeling.

“go home, get some sleep.” it’s a command, almost, like everything Hades says is. she could always refuse but instead of standing up to him like she usually prefers to, she nods, because she could use some sleep in times like now.

***

Eurydice had forgotten love until Calista.

she knew love well before Hadestown but in that span of few months, she forgot what it was like to love. to love something with this fierceness you can’t control, and to have that ability feels powerful. she felt like a monster before, but holding a child close to her chest is what makes her feel human again.

yes, they are still in Hadestown, but when life finds ways to spring up, it flourishes.

she’s moved apartments since finding out about the baby, to a smaller one, a studio with a bathroom and a tiny kitchen but it’s just for her and her daughter. people know that the only current mother in Hadestown lives there, her neighbors seem to brighten at the sight of her child. their darkness when they come back from work slides away for just a little bit of light when Callie smiles at them from afar.

her daughter brings hope, and Eurydice couldn’t be more proud. she doesn’t even know it yet, but Callie is really the carnation in the winter, she’s the light in the dark, the song in the silence.

And Persephone comes back and is immediately pointed in the direction of Eurydice’s apartment by Hades, with barely even a kiss on the cheek, she’s worried something bad has happened. It’s a combination of good and bad in her opinion.

she knocks on the door and a voice calls, “come in!”

Persephone, not knowing what she’ll find, steps inside tentatively. “Hades said to- oh my lords.”

Eurydice sits cross legged on her small bed, a baby sitting in her lap with the widest smile she’s ever seen on a child. she has her mothers eyes, even from here Persephone can see the dark color, the deepness of them.

“hi.” Eurydice begins. Persephone closes the door loudly, accidentally making Eurydice and the baby jump. she surges forward, first taking the young woman’s face in her hands, cupping her cheeks and brushing her cheeks with her thumbs.

“please tell me it’s Orpheus’.” Eurydice nods.

“It is” she assures, “look, she has his nose and you can just see, his hair, too.”

“she’s lovely.” Persephone sighs, sinking to sit beside Eurydice. Persephone brushes Eurydice’s bangs away from her eyes, she notices that they are freshly cut and a little jagged and uneven. she’ll ask about that later. “how old is she?”

“A month.” Eurydice answers immediately, her smile is genuine and Persephone can tell, there is love. a deep, motherly love that Persephone has only ever experienced when she looks at the young girl who turned into a young woman while she was away Up Top. “she came a little early, and I was worried, but she’s doing well now.”

“what’s her name?”

“Calista.” Eurydice says, gently tracing her daughter’s ears and tiny nose. “I started calling her Callie, though, and never stopped.”

“Callie.” Persephone repeats. “I love that.”

“me too.” Eurydice bites her bottom lip, before the real dawning of Persephone being here hits her. her expression barely changes and her tone of voice doesn’t at all but Persephone can feel the shift in the air.

“how is Orpheus doing?”

Persephone continues stroking through her black hair, untangling the knots like she imagines a mother would. “he just started singing again. only the past month or so. his voice sounds different after so long with so little use but it’s just as beautiful as it was when you knew him.”

Eurydice lifts Callie a little higher, adjusts her in her arms so that the child lies with her head in the crook of her elbow. “I’m sad that she’ll never get to meet him.”

she says it simply, she’s already accepted the fact, but underneath that is the lingering of sadness that lies there. an undercurrent of disappointment that Persephone came alone. she’d probably had the tiniest grain of hope and Persephone came empty handed.

“well!” she stands up, straightening out the creases in her dress. “I’d better get to the house, it’s been awhile since I’ve seen my husband up close.”

Eurydice smiles. “alright. see you again really soon?”

“of course.” Persephone plants a kiss on both girl’s heads and heads out the door, blinking away the sharp burn of tears.

***

she walks into Hades’ office and before she can even get the words out, he waves his hand at her without looking up from his ever important paperwork.

“I’m sending her up, don’t worry.”

she opens and closes her mouth. “I thought it might take some convincing.”

he scowls down at his desk. “I’m not heartless. I saw her when she first found out, the selflessness in that girl...” he shakes his head. “she was concerned about not being able to love her kid enough. not being able to provide that for her. she wanted to send Cal up there with you in the spring without her? you know that? the insanity in her, that I’d separate a mother and her child.”

Persephone steps around her and plants a firm, smiling kiss on his lips. Surprising him and pulling him away from his paperwork. “I love you.”

a smile twitches at his lips. “I love you too?”

“so,” Persephone says, promptly taking a small step back. “Eurydice and Callie will come up on the train with me in the spring?”

“as soon as I get all the paperwork in order. this is a... unique situation to say the least.” he turns back to his work, Persephone stands and watches for a moment, before planting one more soft kiss to the top of his head and heading out to get a drink. she can’t tell Eurydice yet, because if it doesn’t come true she’ll be heartbroken but knowing that she’ll be able to take the two of them up with her in the spring will be a joyous moment.

only six months until the couple that became a family gets reunited.

***

Children grow fast, this is something that Eurydice was never told. by the time Callie is seven months old, Eurydice has watched her learn to crawl, learn to reach and to touch and to smile. it still scares her sometimes, that maybe she isn’t meant for this? maybe she’s not cut out for this kind of thing. she’s already had to reason with herself over several things that just dig into her scalp, telling her Callie deserves a better mother. she had to bottle feed her, for god's sakes, her body seems to be malnourished enough and overworked enough that she can’t give that to her daughter. she has to take care of herself too, is what Persephone keeps telling her. she has to give herself a little attention too, give herself some love as well.

she faces Hades one last time in front of the train, he says he’s there to see Persephone off but Eurydice is glad that he’s there.

“thank you,” she says, lifting her chin to look him right in the eyes. “for all that you did for me and Callie, and for you are doing for Orpheus. he doesn’t know it yet, but he will be very thankful to you.”

“don’t say things like that,” he says, voice extra gravelly with the sadness of his wife leaving, but he tries to hide it. “I would never have hired you if I’d known...”

“neither of us knew, I would never have agreed to go if I’d known.”

a small silence stretches between them, she doesn’t know what to do with herself, a year ago she despised this man. everything about him made her heart shudder in her chest, but now... she’s seen his mercy and can’t help but feel that it was there all along.

she holds out her hand to shake his. “thank you, I will make sure to let Calista know as she grows older all that you have done for us.”

he lets out a chuckle as he takes her hand. “I’m sure she will also know all I have done against you.”

“in my opinion, it evens out. thank you.” she drops his hand and climbs onto the train, her stomach starting to swirl in her stomach.

She tries to remind herself of all that she’s been told by Persephone, love herself and that has to be enough, as she climbs the train, she’d handed Calista over to Persephone while Eurydice puts her things on the train. her heart beats so fast, this rhythm of readiness, of anticipation.

thump, thump, thump

Get Callie, she’s getting fussy in another woman’s arms.

thump, thump, thump

Sit down in a seat before the train starts moving.

thump, thump, thump

“if it isn’t my favorite songbird.” a withered voice comes from the front of the train car.

“Hermes.” Eurydice breaths, she speeds her steps up to meet him halfway and throws her arms around his neck. she buries her face in the man’s shoulder, letting him gently hold her like a father would hold a daughter, gently, calmly. he pulls back after barely five seconds.

“you takin’ the train?” she nods with something like tears stinging in the back of her eyes but they aren’t close to falling, yet. Hermes’ smile stretches almost all the way to his eyes, wrinkles creasing on his forehead. “he’ll be waiting for Seph, right by the station.’

Eurydice smiles but her heartbeat is still flurrying over her entire chest, heat spreading across her whole body like a licking fire. she needs a distraction from her shaking hands and churning stomach. Hermes pats her cheek affectionately, finally looking over her shoulder and squinting at Persephone holding the infant in her arms. he narrows his eyes, like he’s seeing a mirage and isn’t sure exactly what he’s seeing.

Eurydice breaks away from him, going to Persephone to take her daughter from the other woman’s arms. “this is your kind of granddaughter, Calista.”

“a lovely name for a lovely girl.” Hermes smiles in that way he always does when he knows something, when he looks at someone and can see their future. Eurydice always feels exposed whenever Hermes looks at her, like he knows what goes on in her head every day. like he knows all of her fears and hopes and emotions. the train starts moving in that moment and Eurydice has to sit down, holding Callie in her lap, pulling her tightly against her chest.

they move through tunnels, the dim lights of the mines flash through the windows every once in awhile, flushing the four of them in a golden glow, turning Persephone’s green dress into a brownish color, splashing across Hermes face briefly and throwing shadows like the darkness of the wall falling over her. she hasn’t worked on the wall in months, hasn’t gone into the mines in about as long, but it still haunts her. to forget how to feel, though since Orpheus came and left, the place improved it still left her feeling like there a life she was missing out on, the other half of her. or maybe it just was that her other half was Up Top. Callie taught her to remember feeling, taught to feel again altogether. and when she begins to whimper in the dark of the train, her heart stutters and all she wants is to make her smile again.

“shhh,” Eurydice murmurs, bounding the little girl on her knee briefly. “it’s alright, love, shh.”

even just her voice soothes the child and she quiets, she is normally not the most emotional infant, though they all cry, Eurydice knows that from her younger siblings. she takes after her mother in that, she only gets emotional really when Eurydice gets emotional. so now, when Eurydice is nervous and fidgety and on edge, the girl picks up on it and begins to cry. she calms herself, taking deep breath and pressing a kiss to her daughters soft bed of dark brown hair.

it’s a longer train ride than Eurydice would think, so they sit in silence, contemplative over what is to come, over what is going to happen when those doors open and sunshine floods the train car. when Orpheus is right before her what will she say? what will she do? he doesn’t even know she’s coming, he’ll be happy to see her, won’t he? yes, yes, he will. she knows this, she knows he loved her, and hopes for that present tense to re-enter the assuredness of her vocabulary. she loves him, simple as that, and he will love what she brings with her.

as light starts to flood the car, she closes her eyes, feeling the warmth flood through her body. the familiar scent of the dirt and the trees, the sound of chattering voices and birds beginning to chirp, everything so familiar yet so foreign. the last time she was this anxious to step outside was during The Walk and she never stepped foot outdoors during that. she’s both ready and most definitely not.

“here,” Persephone says. “I’ll take Cal, and you can step out by yourself. take a look about, greet old friends without this little one in your arms.”

reluctantly, Eurydice relinquishes Callie into Persephone’s arms. she stands, ready to face her fate, ready to smell the earth, bask in the sunlight. she is here, she is full of light, she is ready.

she’s ready.

the train car opens by itself and she steps out, shading her eyes with her hand to gaze over the crowd, which a hush falls over. she is known here, though she looks different. though having been pregnant and gave birth, she’s lost weight. the doctors she saw worried for Callie’s health, when Eurydice has spent her whole life only getting just enough to eat and too often in Hadestown she neglected to eat, after the pregnancy especially, it seemed. she just simply... forgot to take care of herself sometimes. those were the days where she got talks from Persephone, lectures from Hades, both about taking care of herself not just for herself, for Calista. she tried her best, but old habits die hard. she looks more tired now, her hair now just brushing the very tops of her shoulders but the bangs freshly cut. every few months, or when she was feeling especially restless, she would go to the bathroom with a pair of scissors and retrim her bangs. what a great influence she’ll be on her kid.

and in the crowd, in the very back of the crowd, is a boy just a little bit older and more tired looking. and his eyes are raised to hers. his mouth is forming the first syllable of her name, with a question in his eyes. is this real? are you real?

and she wants to run to him and say yes yes yes yes im real this is real this is true

but she can’t move until Hermes walks up beside her, loops his arm through hers and begins to walk her down the steps of the station. the crowd parts for them and Eurydice can’t help but see the imagery of it all. like a bride walking down the aisle, she is being given away for the second time in her life. the first, she gave away herself, in secret. not an elopement but a ritual in which they were “married”. this time, she is given away to this life that she once gave up. here, she is being given permission to step back into this life, she is being given permission to look him in the eyes, to speak to him. he gives her away and leaves her there at the altar- or rather, right in front of Orpheus- and leaves her there, blending back into the crowd.

“how- how... what are you- how are you-?” he runs a hand through his hair, just looking at her, just... looking. “Eurydice-”

when he says her name, her entire body feels like it will combust and she can’t just stay standing there. it feels like their first kiss: happening before she knows what’s happening and over before she wants it to. whistles break out through the crowd, a laughter spreading through the silence. the tension breaks and she’s left just feeling his hands at her waist, and his face close to hers, his breath against her cheeks, fluttering her eyelashes against the breeze.

“how-?” he asks again.

she licks her lips, unsure of how to say it. “I’ll show you.”

Persephone is already walking towards them, holding Callie to her chest. Orpheus, the ever confused, just stares. the two dots not yet connected yet, so he must say the first thing that comes to mind.

“congratulat-”

Persephone shakes her head and laughs. “no, poet.” and hands Callie to Eurydice.

he watches with wide eyes as Eurydice holds the child in one arm and with the other, adjusts Orpheus’ arms so that she can gently place the girl in his arms. she holds both his arms and the baby for a moment before removing her hands and stepping back. his eyes flick from Eurydice, down to the infant, and then back to Eurydice in a panicked state.

“her name is Calista, she’s seven months old... and she’s your daughter.”

Orpheus lets out a huge, deep, shuddering sigh that feels somehow close to tears. he finally looks down and admires the face of the girl in his arms, and as he does, Eurydice tells him about her.

“she has your nose, and your hair, but my eyes. she’s not very talkative but she likes to be read to before going to sleep, and she always, always prefers to sleep close to me, or close to a person. she’s like you, she loves to listen. and she loves people-”

she stops herself at the sight of his face, smiling but filled with this sorrowful inside. “I can’t believe- I missed a whole life starting... Eurydice, she’s so beautiful.”

“not your fault, Orpheus, neither of us knew.” she murmurs. “and now, we’re here.”

“you’re home.”

#hadestown #hadestown fic #orphydice fic #orphydice #orphydice kid #eurydice #pregnant eurydice #i dont really think orphydice will have their own kids but this sprung from my fingerse #hermes #persephone/hades #hades #persephone #canon compliant #and then not #this is so fucking long im so sorry

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mimymomo · 5 years ago

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Homeless Eurydice HC’s

I made a post a while ago about homeless Eurydice AU and an anon asked me to expand the AU further so here it is after a long wait. Thank you for being patient anon!!! There’s a lot of them so I’ll be putting most under the read-more link.

Pre-Orpheus:

Home was not a word Eurydice was familiar with. Sure, she had heard it constantly flung around in public and on TV shows and songs, and questioned by others at school and work, but the idea of ‘home’ and herself never seemed to mix.

From a young age, she found herself bouncing and forth from one misfit foster home to the next, staying at no place for longer than a year.

Even her original residence left many things to be desired: an absentee father, an alcoholic, rarely-present mother with her numerous cruel and creepy boyfriends. It was less a home and more a temporary place until CPS picked her up at age 9. By age 17, she’d had enough: no more homes. She knew she wasn’t going to be adopted, no one wanted a problem child with issues up the wazoo.

So she ran.

For the first few months, Eurydice lived in a tent- it was spring/summer so for the most part, besides the occasional rainstorm, she was fine. She was in school during half of these months so she could shower/eat there and had a place to store some of her belongs. When summer broke out, she took to bathing in ‘less than desirable’ places when the school wasn’t open (public bathrooms with a washcloth and sometimes even outsides in lakes/a kitty pool she bought to wash clothes to save money). But fall rolls around, this has to change.

She devises a plan to spend the spring/summer months in her tent and the fall/winter months in shelters or friend's houses.

Eurydice gets a job at a fast-food joint (NIGHTSHIFTS ARE A GODSEND!) and becomes a master at saving/dividing money. She likes working at restaurants do to food accessibility.

She will sometimes purposely mess up orders so she can eat the returned mistakes. Most managers don’ t catch on but one did and nearly fired her. Some co-workers notice how small and constantly hungry Eurydice always is and often try to sneak/buy her food on her break (Eurydice is more stubborn than a mule so usually outwardly refuses but will eat it secretly).

She buys a membership to a really cheap and crappy gym in order to use their showers (she had some BAD experiences while trying to use said showers but the ability to bathe wins out not using them anymore).

Over the next few years, she PERFECTS the art of keeping good hygiene and smelling good on a budget: a spritz of cheap body spray before drying her skin/clothes completely and travel-sized/dollar store toiletries will go miles!

Eurydice is a master pickpocketer. She won’t do it often because she’s prideful and hates not paying but sometimes when money is real-tight, she the bite the bullet Her most shoplifted items are tampons/pads, washcloths/hand towels, sanitary items, socks, and granola bars. She’ll usually buy one or two items to distract workers from the small stuff she stuffs into her bag.

Eurydice has had to do some other pretty questionable acts that she’s not proud of to get money/shelter but only as an absolute necessity.

Eurydice keeps a tally of ‘How Many Coffeeshops Kick Me Out Because I Make Other Customers Uncomfortable/Other Random Reasons.” She’s at 7 so far. She’s become quite the loiterer (her favorite places are college campuses and libraries).

Meeting Orpheus:

She never meant to go home with him, never meant to even meet the boy with wide, shiny hazel eyes that stared into her soul. It had been a completely random occurrence.

She had only wanted a drink: it was the middle of spring but it still felt like freezing cold winter. She needed something to perk her up.

He was working the bar, wiping down the counter and serving up drinks with a smile that passed the obligatory customer service smile she often wore at her own job. He looked so young, a beacon of natural light in the dark, dinginess of bar. She doesn’t pay him any mind past ordering her drink (the boy stutters as she does so, face flushed pink and he stares at her for far too long. He can’t form a full sentence and instead just nods at her order). An older gentleman with dark skin wearing a fancy silver suit begins conversing with her, asking what brings her in. She doesn’t know what it is, but before she realizes it, she’s immediately spilling her predicament. Nothing too major, she’s not that stupid, but she does admit she has nowhere else to go.

“I’m a homeless runaway who’s in desperate need of a drink. Problem with that?”

She moves from the bar counter to an old table that runs along the sides of the bar wall. She’s lost in her thoughts when it happens:

“Come home with me!”

That’s what he says to her, that beautiful, idiotic bartender with the pretty eyes. Not “hello again”, not “here’s your order”, freaking “come home with me...” Hell, he didn’t even remember her drink!

Eurydice meant to laugh him off, tell him to buzz off and continue on with her night drinking away her woes in peace. Yet, she doesn’t. They, to her utter shock, hit it off surprisingly well. He’s sweet, a bit on the naive side, and has the most precious laughing expression Eurydice has ever seen.

She learns his name is Orpheus, he’s a year younger than her and he works part-time as a bartender here at his guardian's (Orpheus points to the man in the silver suit and he affectionately refers to him as Mister Hermes) bar. He also a musician.

“You’re a player huh? Hope you’re not planning to break my heart, poet.”“No, of course not! I’m not like that.”He tells her about his dream of his song one day being played all over the world and spreading love to all that hear it.

“So you wanna be famous and make a load of money?”

Orpheus shakes his head, “it’s not about the money Eurydice. It’s about expressing feelings to others. Telling a story and hoping that everyone who hears will understand what you mean.”

Eurydice is definitely not enamored by the boy and his poetic words

Eurydice forces Orpheus to sing to her before she agrees to go home with him (”I have to make sure you weren’t a liar as well as a player.”). By the time the first note spills from his lips, she sold.

His apartment is small, modest and cramped, half scribbled in notebooks and sheets of crumpled up paper litter the ground. Pictures of Orpheus, Mister Hermes and some other relatives Eurydice doesn’t recognize decorate his walls and shelves. An acoustic guitar sits undisturbed in its stand in the corner of the one-bedroom home. Nothing happens that night, which stuns Eurydice. Men always want something more. They sit and talk, moving from the living area to the queen-sized bed.

Eurydice asks Orpheus why he decided to let her stay and he answers like it’s the most obvious thing in the world, “because I didn’t want you to be all alone in the cold.” Eurydice would’ve been pissed had anyone else said this to her, she was an adult damn it. She could take care of herself. However, it didn’t sound patronizing coming from his lips. He just genuinely cared.

Eurydice lets Orpheus spoon her from behind, his warm breath tickling the hairs on her neck. She drifts off to sleep to the sounds of Orpheus’ light, harmonious snores, the rest of the outside world for once is silent. It’s the best sleep she’s had in years.

Eurydice thinks that it was a one time deal. That Orpheus, with his head in the clouds and eyes towards the sky, would move on and forget all about her.

But he doesn’t.

He invites to come back the next day as she’s heading out the door.

“You can come back tonight! If you want, that is.”

Eurydice doesn’t say anything at first. She just leaves with a quiet, “we’ll see.”

She finds herself back at the bar and in Orpheus’ bed again that night.

She finds herself returning to the quaint apartment again and again. She makes excuses (the shelter ran out of rooms, my tent has a hole in it, etc.), she’s sure Orpheus doesn’t buy them after a while but he never questions her which she greatly appreciates.

Soon, she starts leaving things in his house. Small things- a bag, some clothes, a toothbrush. Small things turn into big things then all of her things.

Their relationship quickly morphs from friendship to romantic in the following weeks. Were they moving fast? Yes, definitely. Too fast? Maybe, but for them, it wasn’t fast enough.

Eurydice doesn’t know when she started thinking of Orpheus’ apartment as her home but she clearly remembers the first time she said it out loud: she’s outside the bar, kissing Orpheus goodbye as he’s heading into work.

“See you at home lover boy.” She pauses, home? Is that what it is?

Orpheus, not noticing her hesitation, kisses her once more, “I’ll see you at home. Love you.”

‘Home, huh?’ For the first time, the word didn’t sound funny rolling off her tongue. It didn’t send acidic shocks down to her stomach, quite the opposite really, she felt butterflies fluttering about in its place. Home. She finally had a home. ‘Maybe wasn’t such a bad thing after all?’ She smiled as she continued her way back to her and Orpheus’ apartment, already ready to see her boyfriend back at home.

I’m so sorry that this is so late anon! But it’s super long so I hope that makes up for it slightly!

#hadestown #orphydice #orpheus x eurydice #eurydice #orpheus

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goldenmessenger · 5 years ago

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TS Actor AU: Eye of the Storm

Summary: In New York City, Patton has some big plans, and Virgil's got his back. Logan is oblivious. But very quickly the night changes into something none of them expected.

Takes place at roughly the same time as IronWoman359's "I've Got You Brother" and my "Aftermath"

Read on Ao3 here.

A/N: Hey everyone! It’s Em, back with more Actor AU! This is #4 from my ideas list, where we get to see what was going on in NYC with our other boys during Remus’s disastrous interview. I’m very happy with how parts of this turned out. And this is a whopper, my longest one yet at 6026 words. Never written quite this much in one go, so I hope you guys like it!

Next, more of Thomas and Virgil figuring out their relationship, then we get to meet the kids! Or some of them, at least.

As usual, let me know if you want to be added to the taglist!

Content Warnings: Panic, tempers, irrational thoughts

*************************************

Patton paced back and forth in Virgil’s hotel room, nervous energy filling every fiber of his being. What if something went wrong? What if he screwed up? What if Logan disliked it so much that he never wanted to see him again or—

“Take a breath, Pop Star.” Virgil’s voice broke through the haze of anxiety weighing Patton down. “You’re going to wear a hole in the carpet. You’ve gone over every step of this, it’ll be perfect.”

“You sure?” Patton said, flopping down on the bed next to Virgil. “What-what if I forget what I want to say, or I trip and break my nose, or I trip and break Logan’s nose—”

“Breathe, Pat.” Virgil said, maintaining his calm tone. “You’re grinding again.”

Patton inhaled deeply, then exhaled slowly. Virgil placed his hands gently on his friend’s shoulder.

“You and Logan might not have been together very long, but I can tell that he loves you so much. Even if things do go wrong tonight, he’ll still think it’s all perfect, because you’re there with him.” Virgil said. “And you guys have already adopted two kids together, and that’s one of the biggest steps you can take as a couple. What’s one more?”

Patton smiled thankfully at Virgil, then stood up.

“He’s probably going to be ready to go soon.” Patton said, looking at the door that connected Virgil’s hotel room to his and Logan’s. Patton turned back to Virgil. “How do I look?” He asked, feeling nervous again.

Patton had picked out a light blue floral sundress, with a skirt that was higher in the front than the back, and was wearing a pair of light brown flats with them. Virgil had done his makeup, light on the foundation so as not to hide Patton’s freckles, which Logan adored, and with glittery silver eyeshadow. The lipstick was simple as well, a nice rosy pink. Patton’s curly hair, which he always kept shoulder-length when not filming the show, had been pulled back into a simple side braid.

“You look gorgeous, Pat.” Virgil said firmly. “And I know Logan will agree.”

“Know Logan will agree with what?”

Virgil and Patton both turned to find Logan standing right next to the door between the rooms. Patton’s jaw dropped. Logan was wearing white slacks and black shoes, but the star of the otherwise simple outfit was his top. It was a off the shoulder button-up top that was dark blue, but glittered like a sky full of stars.

“I was just telling Pat that you’d think he looks absolutely gorgeous.” Virgil said, grinning at his lovebird friends.

“Virgil is absolutely correct, Patton.” Logan said. “You look absolutely stunning.”

“So do you.” Patton said, beaming at his boyfriend.

Virgil pretended to gag at how cute the two were, but they both knew he was only joking.

“You two better shoo,” Virgil said, “Pat has a pretty full date planned, and I don’t think you’ll want to miss any of it.”

“What are your plans while we’re gone?” Logan asked.

“Gonna watch Remus’s interview when it airs, go to bed. This is his first one for the show, after all. Gotta show some support.” Virgil said, then frowned. “I wasn’t kidding about the shooing guys, we’ve got free time right now, but we’ve got an absolutely hectic day of interviews tomorrow. You’ll both want your sleep.”

“Don’t worry, Virge!” Patton said cheerily. “You’ll barely even notice we’re gone!’

Virgil smiled.

“I doubt that. Now go. I’m gonna FaceTime my boyfriend so I’m not feeling like a third wheel.”

*************************************

“That was quite a well-done show.” Logan said, and Patton smiled up at him, doing his best to contain the nervousness that had come back with a vengeance.

The evening had gone very well. Dinner was at a rather expensive steakhouse where Patton had gotten them reservations, and then they had gone to watch the musical Hadestown, where they had perfect seats right in the middle of the orchestra.

And now they were in the car, with their driver taking them back to the hotel. Or, at least, that’s where Logan thought they were going. Patton’s hand tightened around the object in his pocket. It was going to work, Virgil was right, there was no reason to be nervous.

And yet, Patton still was.

“The effects were spectacular and I was quite impressed with all of the actors.” Logan continued, not seeming to have noticed Patton’s nerves. “Though the ending was very sad. It was certainly foolish of Orpheus to turn around like that—”

The car stopped suddenly, and Logan blinked in surprise.

“This isn’t the hotel.” He said, bemused.

“No, it’s not.” Despite his nervousness, Patton couldn’t help but let a smile spread across his face. “Come on Lo, let’s go inside.”

*************************************

The Hayden Planetarium and the museum that contained it were usually closed by this time of night, but the management had been more than happy to let Patton use it once he explained his plan (and, of course, offered the museum a not insignificant donation).

Patton led Logan to the planetarium. When they entered, the ‘sky’ lit up, filling with stars.

“Patton,” Logan said, “what is all of this?”

“Well,” Patton said, stepping backward into the planetarium, “I wanted to do this with a sky of stars above us, but since we’re in the middle of a city, I thought that this would be a close second.”

“Do what?” Logan questioned, and Patton smiled and took Logan’s hands in his.

“Logan Clarke, two years ago today you decided to throw all caution to the wind and ask me out, and I will never stop being glad that you did.” Patton paused for a breath, suddenly distracted by his phone buzzing in his back pocket. Then Logan smiled at him, and gestured for Patton to continue, and Patton forgot all about his phone.

“I love you more than almost anything else in the entire world,”

“Almost?” Logan questioned teasingly and Patton grinned back.

“Yeah, you’re tied with the kids.” Patton said, and Logan laughed. Feeling a new surge of courage and love burst through him, Patton decided to ditch the rest of his speech. He didn’t need it. Letting go of Logan’s hands and pulling out the small box that had been burning a hole in his pocket for the last three months, Patton went down on one knee. He was vaguely aware of his phone buzzing again, but he ignored it. Whoever it was could wait.

“Logan Clarke, will you marry me?”

Logan smiled a big smile, the kind Patton had only seen on his face three times. First, when Logan had asked him out, the second when they had decided to move in together, and the third when the adoption papers for their children had been finalized.

“Yes.” Logan said softly, then pulled Patton up to his feet and the couple kissed. Patton pulled back and took the ring out of the box.

“I think you’ll be wanting this.” Patton said with a smile. “I was going to go for a custom ring, but I consulted the kids, and Piper and Hazel both thought that you’d like this.”

The ring hadn’t been very expensive as engagement rings go, but Patton knew that Logan wouldn’t want anything huge. Logan was a huge fan of Lord of the Rings, and so the kids had convinced Patton to buy a replica of Aragorn and Arwen’s engagement ring. From the smile on Logan’s face as Patton slipped it on his finger, Patton knew that he had made the right choice.

The couple kissed again, arms entwining around each other.

Suddenly, Patton’s phone buzzed again.

“Is that your phone?” Logan asked.

“Yeah,” Patton frowned. “That’s the third or fourth time it’s buzzed in the last several minutes. I should probably check it and make sure that it’s not Dot and Larry calling about the girls.”

Reluctantly, the two pulled apart and Patton pulled his phone out.

5 Missed Calls From: ‘Dark Strange Son’

“Five missed calls from Virgil?” Logan said.

“Yeah, he knew I was going to propose, maybe he was just excited to hear how it went?” Patton suggested. But as soon as he said it, both he and Logan frowned.

“That’s not really like Virgil.” Logan said. “Maybe Roman or Thomas, but not Virgil. He would’ve waited for us to call him.”

“That’s a fair point—” Patton began, and suddenly Logan’s phone began to buzz. Logan immediately pulled it out.

Incoming call from: ‘Virgil Matthew Bailey’

Logan instantly picked it up and put it on speakerphone.

“Virgil, what’s going on?”

“Thank goodness I finally got ahold of you.” Virgil’s voice burst through in a panicked rush. Patton and Logan both exchanged worried looks. They both knew Virgil well enough to tell when the younger man was on the edge of a panic attack.

“I’m really sorry to interrupt your date, but you guys need to come back to the hotel room now. Remus’s interview—it’s hard to explain—”

“No need.” Logan said promptly. “We’ll be right there.”

*************************************

They’d watched the interview on their phones on the way back to the hotel.

Logan couldn’t say that he blamed Remus for losing his temper. In the early days of Season One, when the prying questions seemed to come at Roman every other interview, Logan had stormed out of quite a few interviews himself, sometimes dragging Roman out with him. So Logan couldn’t say he’d behave any differently from Remus.

The whole ride home, Patton was curled into Logan’s side, all too quiet. Logan knew that was a bad sign. Where Virgil’s anxiety could be louder, with panicked rambling and hyperventilating, Patton’s was very quiet. He would shut down, trapped under the swirling chaos of his own thoughts. Most people wouldn’t even realize that Patton wasn’t ok, because he would fly under the radar.

Logan wasn’t most people.

He knew his boyfriend’s—his fiancé’s tells very well. Patton wouldn’t want to talk right now, and the best Logan could do was be here for Patton until he was ready to talk.

Logan began to mentally prepare himself for their arrival at the hotel. As long as at least one of them was calm, Virgil and Patton were pretty good at grounding each other. But if they were both freaking out, then they would feed into each other’s panic and escalate it. Logan’s job was to be the calm mediator between the two. Or at least, to do his best.

Finally, their car arrived at the hotel. Logan and Patton were upstairs as quickly as their legs would take them.

When they entered Virgil’s hotel room, Logan could already tell that Virgil had worked himself into a state. There was an abandoned plate of food on the coffee table that looked like it hadn’t been touched. So it looks like Virgil hasn’t eaten. Since lunch, I’m guessing. That’s not a great sign.

Logan was about to talk things over with both of them when his phone rang. It was Thomas. Logan stepped to the side as Patton and Virgil sat on the bed, silent.

“Salutations, Thomas. I presume you’re calling about the interview?” “Yeah, it’s a bit of a mess, isn’t it. How are Pat and Virge holding up?” Thomas asked. Logan wasn’t offended that his friend didn’t ask about him, as both men knew that while Logan was worried, he’d be fine. Patton and Virgil on the other hand….

“They’re pretty quiet right now,” Logan said, “which is worrying me a little. But I think they’re doing ok.”

“That’s good.” Thomas said. “Keep an eye on Virgil for me, will you? I know he gets really worked up about this sort of thing, and it can be hard to help him to calm down. I’d be there myself but—”

“I understand.” Logan said. Thomas had been meant to be in NYC with them, but something had come up with one of the Studio’s other shows, so Thomas had stayed back to help Joan take care of it.

“Thanks Logan. Tell him I’ll call when I can, and let them both know that I’ve already got the PR department working on how to spin this.”

“I will.” Logan promised. Logan began to be vaguely aware that Virgil and Patton were talking, but he stayed focused on Thomas.

“Thank you. Also, I wanted to check in with you, as it’s likely that your interviews tomorrow will probably bring up what happened with Remus tonight. So I recommend that the three of you come up with a game plan on how to handle it.”

“I’ll discuss it with the others as soon as I’m done talking to you—” Logan paused, suddenly catching a snippet of Virgil and Patton’s conversation.

“I’ve been looking up last second flights online in case Dillon’s private jet can’t take us for some reason. The soonest doesn’t leave until tomorrow morning.” Virgil said, barely looking at Patton, focused on the laptop screen in front of him.

“Morning isn’t soon enough!” Patton said emphatically. “I’m sure Captain Benson could get the jet ready in a couple of hours if I gave him the heads up.”

“Logan, you still there?” Thomas asked. “You trailed off for a second.”

“Thomas,” Logan said. “I’m afraid I’ll have to cut our conversation short, as it sounds like you brother and my boyfriend are about to make a rather rash decision.” Logan heard Thomas sigh heavily.

“They want to come back to LA, don’t they?”

“Yes, it would seem so.” Logan confirmed.

“Well, I’ll let you go so you can try to talk them down. Tell Virgil that, as his brother, I understand where he’s coming from, and that he’s just worried about his boyfriend. However, as his boss, I need the three of you to stay in New York. It will only make the bad press worse if you three abandon interviews to come back.”

“I’ll tell him.” Logan promised, and the conversation ended. He turned to Patton and Virgil, who seemed to have heard at least Logan’s half of the end of the conversation.

“We’re not making a rash decision.” Patton said, indignant. Virgil nodded in agreement.

“It’s simple facts.” Virgil said, tone leaving no room for disagreement. “We need to get back to LA as soon as possible.”

“I know both of you are worried about Roman and Remus,” Logan said, “but we have a commitment to go to those interviews tomorrow. We can’t just abandon that.”

“To hell with interviews!” Virgil said, angry. “I couldn’t care less about what the media thinks.”

“Roman and Remus need us Logan,” Patton said, pleading, “we need to be there.” “I know that this is stressful for both of you,” Logan said, keeping his voice calm, “but panicking isn’t going to help anyone.”

“But—” Patton began, but Logan interrupted.

“Have either of you actually tried to call Roman or Remus? Or even Dillon?” Logan asked. Patton shifted in his seat and Virgil wouldn’t look at Logan.

“....No.” Patton admitted finally. Virgil stayed silent, which was answer enough.

“First of all, this isn’t the first time, or the last, that the twins will have to handle bad press. Second, I just got off of the phone with Thomas, and he says that they’ve got it handled. He also said we need to stay here for now.”

Patton and Virgil remained silent. Patton looked like he was about to burst into tears, but Virgil looked downright mutinous. Logan sensed they still weren’t convinced. He was beginning to get a little frustrated. Why was it so hard to convince two grown men to make a sensible decision?

“I’m sure that while Roman and Remus would both appreciate your support, they would agree with me that for now, you both need to stay here.” Logan stated, which finally got a reaction out of Virgil, who shot to his feet.

“You don’t know that!” Virgil argued. “You haven’t even talked to them, how would you know what they want us to do?”

“Neither have you.” Logan reminded Virgil, but it came out more forcefully than he would’ve liked. Logan stopped. He felt like he was on the edge of losing his temper, and that wouldn’t help anybody if he did. Logan took a deep breath to try to ground himself, then an idea occurred to him.

An obvious one, in retrospect.

“There’s an easy solution to this.” Logan said.

“And what would that be?” Virgil demanded, rather petulantly. “Because I don’t see one.”

“Don’t be mean, Virge.” Patton chided. “At least hear Logan out.”

“Oh, so now you’re siding with your boyfriend over me, huh?” Virgil demanded.

“I-I, no, I’m not siding with him—” Patton began to stammer, and Logan realized he needed to take control over the situation before it spiraled out of control again.

“The simple solution,” Logan interjected. “Is that we call Roman and Remus, and wait to make a decision until we are aware that our drastic action is needed. Does that sound satisfactory to you both?”

Silence. Eventually both men gave their begrudging assent to Logan’s plan.

“Good. I’ll make the call, and while I do that, you two need to take care of yourselves.”

When both men began to utter protests, Logan cut them off.

“Virgil, I saw the plate of food on the counter, it looked like it hadn’t been touched. Have you even eaten a thing since lunch?”

“...no.” Virgil mumbled guiltily.

“What?” Patton said in shock. Logan could almost see Patton’s mothering instincts redirect from the absent Roman and Remus to Virgil as this new information registered. “Virgil, it’s past midnight now,that was nearly 10 hours ago!”

“Fine, fine, I’ll eat.” Virgil grumbled. “But I’m just doing it so you’ll leave me alone, not cause I’m actually hungry.” Patton looked like he was about to argue with Virgil on that, so Logan cut in.

“And both of you need to drink some water. Since Virgil forgot to eat, I doubt he’s drank much either. And, Pat, I know you’ve had nothing but soda to drink since dinner. Maybe that will help both of you to destress a bit.”

“There you go again with that extremist water agenda.” Virgil muttered, but he was already headed over to the kitchenette, Patton on his heels.

Logan watched them for a second, then picked up his phone, and found Dillon’s number.

*************************************

It was about two in the morning. Logan had been trying on and off to reach Roman, Remus, or Dillon. No luck yet.

Virgil and Patton were both collapsed on the couch. The three of them had migrated to Logan and Patton’s room, which, unlike Virgil’s, was a full suite (Virgil had been offered one, but he opted for a smaller room as he didn’t think he needed all of that space). Patton and Virgil had been watching cartoons while Logan made the call. They both seemed to have calmed down quite a bit, but were still quiet and on edge. Both men looked like they were nearly asleep, but both were fighting to stay awake to hear if Logan would have any success.

Logan was exhausted as well, but he couldn’t sleep. He needed to make sure everything was ok. He told himself it was to reassure Patton and Virgil, but he knew that on some level, he needed it too. Logan shifted in the armchair he sat in, trying to get more comfortable. He looked over at his friend and his fiancé, and silently prayed he could get them some answers soon.

Finally, Logan tried to call Dillon once more. This time, it worked, and Dillon picked up the phone.

“Salutations, Dillon,” Logan said, “So you know, you’re on speakerphone.” Out of the corner of his eye, Logan saw both Patton and Virgil perk up from where they sat on the couch, instantly awake and listening intently.

“Logan, hello.” Dillon replied, matching Logan’s formal tone. Despite the tone, Dillon sounded as exhausted as Logan felt. “I’m guessing you’re calling about Remus’s interview tonight?”

“Yes, I am.” Logan said. “It was mutually agreed that out of Patton, Virgil, and myself that I would be the best candidate to call at the moment.” Logan heard Dillon sigh heavily, and clearly the kids were rubbing off on Logan, because Logan’s distinct thought was ‘mood’.

“Let me guess, Patton and Virgil have both gotten themselves into an anxious frenzy over the interview?”

Logan saw that Patton’s expression had become rather sheepish. Dillon knew him all too well.

“Yes, they’re pretty worked up about it.” Logan admitted. “Virgil is this close to buying a plane ticket to flying out of New York City first thing tomorrow to be by his boyfriend’s side, or getting the private jet to take us back. And Patton isn’t far behind. But I convinced them that we should communicate with one of you first, and make sure that it’s needed.”

Patton and Virgil were hanging on every word that was spoken, waiting to hear something that would reassure them, or prove them right.

“Tell them that while the gesture is appreciated, it’s unnecessary.” Dillon reassured Logan. “Roman and Remus are both doing fine. They talked about it, and now they’ve fallen asleep on the couch. I’d wake them up to talk to you, but I think that they both needed the rest. You should all finish the round of interviews up there, and we’ll be fine until you return.”

“That’s good to hear—” Logan agreed, but Patton interrupted.

“Tell Dill to take some photos, that sounds adorable!” Patton gushed. Virgil shrugged in agreement.

“Patton is demanding photographic evidence of this occurrence.” Logan informed his friend, smiling a little.

“I’ll send it once we finish talking here.”

“Splendid.” Logan said.

“Tell him I said thank you.” Patton told Logan. Logan nodded.

“Patton says to thank you for the photo in advance.” Logan said, passing on the message. Then Virgil finally spoke.

“Could you ask Dillon to have Roman call if he gets the chance?” Virgil asked nervously, wringing his hands.

“I will.” Logan promised, and returned to Dillon.

“If he’s feeling up to it in the morning, however, would you mind having Roman call himself? I think both Patton and Virgil would feel a little better if they were to hear from him. If he isn’t, however, I believe hearing from Remus would suffice.” “I’ll ask as soon as they wake up.” Dillon promised.

“Good.” Logan said briefly. He was about to continue, but Patton stood up.

“It sounds like we’ve decided on staying then.” Patton said, matter of fact. Virgil made a face.

“Maybe you guys have,” Virgil muttered, “I’m still not sold on it.”

“Oh, don’t be such a Grumpy Gus.” Patton said, frowning.

“I’m not being grumpy, I’m just worried.” Virgil insisted, folding his arms. Logan sensed the beginning of an argument brewing, so he decided to cut in before it got worse.

“Why don’t you both get some sleep?” Logan suggested. “I think we’re all feeling rather stressed, and we do have a full day tomorrow.” Virgil looked like he was going to argue, then shrugged.

“Fine.” Virgil grumbled. “Sounds like you guys have made the decision for me anyways.” Patton stood up.

“Come on V,” Patton said, “I’ll make us some tea to make up for calling you a Grumpy Gus, how does that sound?”

“Logan, are you still there?” Dillon’s voice came through the phone, slightly startling Logan, who had briefly forgotten that Dillon was still on the line.

“Yes, sorry about that.” Logan apologized, feeling embarrassed about leaving Dillon waiting like that. “Patton has just dragged Virgil off into his hotel room. I managed to convince them they both need to get some sleep, as it’s rather late here.”

“Right, it’s almost 3:00 in the morning there, isn’t it? Shouldn’t you be getting to bed too?”

“Yes, you are right about that.” Logan paused, then something occurred to him, “I did want to talk to you without the two of them present.”

“What about?” Logan sighed. So this is how they were playing this. He’d just have to be blunt.

“You’ve been very calm through our whole conversation,” Logan said gently, “which is unusual for you. Which means you’re plotting again.” “What? Me?” Dillon said, as innocently as he could manage, though Logan knew that they both knew that Dillon was full of crap. “I don’t plot. I do.”

“You can’t get revenge on every reporter who asks a question that you don’t like.” Logan scolded.

“It’s more than just not liking the question and you know it, Logan.” Dillon argued. “Besides, I wouldn’t call it revenge. I’m simply going to use my status as one of Hollywood’s A-List celebrities to get an appearance on several of Osborne’s rival shows, as well as… encouraging… my fellow stars to do the same. Maybe it won’t affect him at all, or maybe he’ll happen to get low ratings for a little bit. Maybe it’ll give him some time to think about why you shouldn’t ask invasive questions.” Logan groaned, but he knew that there was no stopping Dillon once he was set on a plan of action. And as Dillon’s plans of revenge usually went, this was actually fairly mild.

“Alright, I know I can’t stop you,” Logan conceded, “but as your friend, I’m asking you to be careful. The PR department already is going to have to do a lot of work to smooth things over after Remus stormed out. And his reaction tonight is only going to attract those who seek out drama. What I’m saying is that the last thing we need right now is a repeat of the Wine Incident from the Season Two interviews.” There was silence on Dillon’s end of the line, which let Logan know that his words had hit their mark. They didn’t talk about the Wine Incident.

“You’re right, I did go too far back then.” Dillon admitted, and Logan had to hold back a snort. ‘Too far’ was putting it somewhat mildly.

“But you don’t need to worry too much,” Dillon continued, “Remus is calm for now, but tensions are still high. I think I’m going to have my hands full with keeping him from decking any reporters who get nosy.”

“That’s good to hear.” Logan replied. Unexpectedly, he yawned. It caught him off guard, and for the first time it really began to sink in just how late it was. Dillon clearly heard the yawn too, from his next reply.

“You should get to bed.” Dillon suggested. “I hear you have a long day of interviews tomorrow.”

“Yes, you’re right.” Logan agreed. Another time, he might have argued that he would be fine, but he was too tired to. Though there was one more thing Logan needed to take care of. “If you need to talk about any of this, though, I’m here for you.”

“Me?” Dillon said in surprise. “I’m fine. Roman and Remus are the ones having to deal with their painful past being dragged back into the media’s line of fire.” “Dillon.” Logan said, not unkindly. “You may not be as entangled in it all as the two of them are, but I know it affects you. And there’s nothing wrong with that. Remus is your husband, and Roman is practically your brother. And you’ve been there for both of them through a lot of the harder moments. Remus often tells me that he doesn’t think he would’ve made it through college alive without you. You’re just as invested in all of this. I know that if Patton was involved in something like this, it would affect me as well.”

What Logan didn’t say was, I know where you’re coming from. You and I, we’re problem solvers. We’re good at being emotional stabilizers for others. We’re good at taking on all of the problems of those we love, and being their constant. What we aren’t good at is letting people do that for us.

“You’re right.” Dillon admitted, and Logan smiled. There was a time nearly two decades ago that Dillon wouldn’t have admitted that so willingly. “I shouldn’t bottle up my feelings. I’ve told Pat that enough times and I’d be a hypocrite if I didn’t take my own advice. I am fine right now; I’ll let you know if that changes.”

“Good.” Logan said, and hoped his tone got across how much he truly cared. For Dillon, and all the rest.

Out of the corner of his eye, Logan saw Patton perched on the edge of the couch next to him. His fiance was dressed in his pajamas, and had two cups of tea in his hands. Patton smiled at Logan, and Logan realized that Patton was probably waiting for him. Logan saw the clock as well. It was already 3:00 in the morning.

“I should be off to bed.” Logan told Dillon. “Please tell Roman and Remus we called, and we’re all here for them. For all of you.”

“I will.” Dillon promised, and the conversation ended. Logan hung up the phone, and turned to Patton, who pressed a mug of tea into his hand.

“Come on Lo,” Patton said, “Let’s get some rest.”

*************************************

Light streamed into the quiet hotel room. Not a single sound entered Logan’s ears except for the soft breathing of his fiance. Patton was snuggled into Logan’s side, arms wrapped around him. Everything was calm and peaceful compared to the panic of last night.

Or, this morning, to be more accurate.

Patton had been out as soon as his head hit the pillow, but Logan hadn’t been able to fall asleep for at least another hour. Actually, he couldn’t remember if he even had fallen asleep. But he must have, right? Logan would remember if he hadn’t.

Logan looked over Patton’s shoulder and saw that the clock on the nightstand currently read 9:01. Oh no. They’d totally overslept. Their first interview was supposed to be at 10:00, and they were told to be there by 8:00. Logan began to get up in a panic, accidentally jostling Patton awake.

“Lo?” Patton mumbled sleepily. “What’s going on?”

“It’s 9:00, and we’re supposed to already be at the television studio by now, and it’s a 20 minute drive without traffic, but this is NYC, so there will be traffic, and we still need to get dressed and—” Patton gently set a hand on Logan’s arm, which halted Logan’s rambling in its tracks.

“It’s fine, Lo.” Patton said calmingly.

“How can it be fine?” Logan demanded. “We can’t afford to be late, not after the bad press we’re likely to get from Remus’s interview last night, and this will look bad on us and the studio—”

“Lo.” Patton interrupted again. Patton sat up, and gently took Logan’s hands in his, and pulled Logan down so that he was sitting on the bed next to Patton. “It’s ok, honey. Thomas called about two hours ago. He’s had the PR department rearrange our interviews for today, so we don’t have to be at the first one until one. We can relax for a little longer.”

Logan felt his panic slowly fade, and leaned his forehead against Patton’s, letting Patton wrap his arms around him. Logan was so tired. Now that he knew that he didn’t need to rush out, he wanted to just fall asleep. But first, Logan needed to ask Patton something.

“Why didn’t you wake me up?” Logan murmured softly, pulling back and looking Patton directly in his eyes. Patton smiled.

“I thought about it, but I knew that you were still awake after I fell asleep, so you got even less sleep than Virgil and I did.” Patton said. “Virgil and I both agreed that we should let you sleep.”

“I’m fine.” Logan protested mildly. “I’ve gotten by on less sleep before.”

“That doesn’t mean it’s a good idea.” Patton chided. “And I knew that if I woke you up then, you wouldn’t be able to fall back asleep.”

“It wouldn’t have been on purpose.” Logan mumbled.

“I know, honey. I knew that you can’t fall asleep during the day, but you would have been exhausted and irritable. You did such a good job of taking care of Virgil and I last night, so now let us take care of you. You can’t help anyone if you run yourself ragged, isn’t that what you always tell me?”

“You have a point.” Logan admitted.

“Besides,” Patton said with a smile, “I thought it might be nice to spend a lazy morning with my fiance.”

Logan’s eyes widened as he remembered, and he looked down at his hand. The silver ring with its two snakes entwined together sparkled in the light, the emerald eyes gleaming.

“I completely forgot about that.” Logan murmured in wonder. “With all the craziness last night, it slipped my mind.” “Mine too.” Patton said softly. “And I was the one who planned it.”

Both men were lying back against the pillows now, Logan leaning into Patton’s side. They sat in silence for a bit, both looking at the ring on Logan’s hand.

“We’ll have to get you a ring too.” Logan said. “Maybe before we announce it.”

“When are we going to announce it?” Patton said softly. “I mean, with everything that’s happening right now.” Logan shrugged.

“Maybe we should wait until everything gets a little quieter, and everyone’s not so on edge.” Logan suggested. “Right now we need to focus on getting everything to calm down.”

“Yeah, I was kinda thinking the same thing.” Patton said.

“But I think we’re headed in the right direction.” Logan said. “Dillon’s a lot calmer than he was the last time this happened. So, at least we don’t have to worry about another Wine Incident.”

“Thank goodness.” Patton said, shuddering. “That was a total mess to deal with.” “Figuratively and literally.” Logan agreed.

“It kinda looked like a scene from Carrie,” Patton recalled, “I’m not even sure where he got ahold of all of that wine so quickly.”

“It’s a good thing for the world that your brother is on the side of good.” Logan chuckled softly. “Otherwise, we’d all be in trouble.”

“Very true.” Patton agreed.

The two of them sat in silence again, but it was the comfortable kind. The kind you can only attain when with someone who you love and trust unconditionally, and who you know returns it. The silence was interrupted by the loud rumbling of Logan’s stomach.

“Sounds like someone’s hungry.” Patton said with a smile. “I haven’t eaten either, so why don’t we order room service?”

“Sounds like a plan.” Logan replied. “Then we can think about beginning to get ready for the interview.”

“We could,” Patton said, slowly, “but we still have a lot of time to fill before the interview…”

“I could think of a few things we could do to fill that time, darling.” Logan said suggestively, catching on to what Patton was suggesting.

Patton smiled back at Logan, and then leaned forward and kissed him gently on the lips. Patton pulled back, and stood up.

“I’ll go get the room service menu, I think it got left in the living room.”

As Patton left, Logan smiled. He honestly didn’t know how on earth he got as lucky to end up with someone as wonderful as Patton. Logan didn’t know what he would do without him.

Patton was his center, his driving force. His calm in the middle of the storm.

In a couple hours, they would need to get ready for the interview.

In a couple hours, they would need to talk to Virgil and review the document that Thomas had forwarded to them that outlined how they should handle any questions about Remus’s interview last night.

In a few hours, they would have to navigate an interview carefully and calmly, and refuse to rise to any bait that might be sent their way.

But for now, Logan and Patton could let things be calm, and take refuge in each other in the eye of a slowly gathering storm.

*************************************

Taglist:

@ironwoman359

@galacticguppy

@trashpanda-remus

@atticusfinchthelegend

@ravenclawunicorn1

@voidvirgil

@dogwithpants

@dreaming-about-kittens

@ro-arts-blog

#sanders sides #sanders sides fanfic #sanders sides au #ts actor au #logan sanders #patton sanders #virgil sanders #thomas sanders #deceit sanders #logicality #mentioned prinxiety #implied dukeceit #my writing #my au

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kenzierose53 · 5 years ago

Text

Promises (ix)

This whole situation I have gotten myself into is ridiculous. Might as well tease the boy a bit more for mortifying me in front of everyone. "Lover tell me if you can," my voice was sing-songy. His eyes lit up with my voice. "Who's gonna buy the wedding bands? Times being what they are, hard and getter harder all the time."

He was just like a lost puppy following me. "Lover when I sing my song, all the rivers will sing along and they're gonna break their banks for us, with their gold be generous. All a-flashin' in the pan, all to fashion for your hand. The rivers gonna give us the wedding bands." He didn't break eye contact during this at all. He was trying to convince me he was magical.

"Lover tell me if you're able, who's gonna lay the wedding table? Times being what they are, dark and getting darker all the time?" I had sat down on top of a table during this as I stared him down.

He continued to hold my gaze and gesture as he sang, "Lover when I sing my song, all the trees gonna sing along. And they're gonna bend their branches down, to lay their fruit upon the ground. The almond and the apple and the sugar from the maple. The trees gonna lay the wedding table."

He tried to walk towards me but I just stepped back. His forwardness was something that I wasn't so used to. He was so confident in what he was planning on doing but also he looked beyond nervous. It was cute. He held his hand out for me to grasp. Hesitantly I reached my hand towards his, just to brush my fingers across his hand before snatching it away. He just smiled at the slight bit of contact. "So when you sing your song, the one you're working on, spring will come again?"

"Yes!"

If he is so confident in this magic song, why hasn't he sang it? "Why don't you sing it then?"

He appeared a bit nervous, "It isn't finished."

"Sing it." I want to hear this song so I did the only thing I could think of to get it out of him. I dropped my coat over one of my shoulders exposing my shoulder. His eyes widened slightly, "You wanna take me home?" I shot him a wink and I thought he was going to explode.

Shaking his head, he said, "Yes!" There was a slight blush on his face.

I pulled the jacket back up, "Sing the song."

Walking away I saw the other patrons of the bar were super engaged with what was going on. Orpheus walked over to one of the tables and stood on it. Slowly the bar was filled with his angelic voice saying one simple thing, la. The patrons were making a runway out of the tables as he made his way closer to me.

All of the sudden he was kneeling and in his hand sat a red flower. I couldn't take my eyes off of the flower, it just appeared out of nowhere. "How did you do that?" my voice came out breathless as I rushed to see it up close.

Orpheus, who looked just as shocked as I, said, "I don't know. The song is not finished though."

I genteelly took the flower out of his hand, "Even so it can do this." Maybe I underestimated this poet.

"I know."

I still couldn't look away from this flower, "You have to finish it!" Maybe I should give this boy a shot? I mean if he can make a flower as beautiful as this bloom out of nowhere he can't be that bad, right? Turning back to shoot him a smile I continued singing, "Lover tell me when we're wed, who's gonna make the wedding bed? Times being what they are, hard and getting harder all the time."

He jumped off the table and came to stand next to me. "Lover when I sing my song, all the brings gonna sing along and they'll come flying from all around, to lay their feather on the ground. And we'll lie down in eiderdown, the pillow beneath our heads. The birds gonna make the wedding bed."

I skipped my way back to sit over on the table, "And the trees gonna lay the wedding table."

The poet continued walking towards me with such confidence in the imaginary wedding we speak of. "And the rivers gonna give us the wedding bands."

He reached his hand out to me again but this time I gladly grasped it. His warm grasp was comforting. Slowly he lowered back down to one knee and I felt something inside of me crack. This boy is gonna be special.

I woke with a gasp. Orpheus! The name! I know his name! The flower, he made bloom with his song. He made it bloom for me. I reached out and touched the soft petals of the flower by my bedside. Orpheus. His name was on repeat in my head, it was a melody.

Suddenly my door opened and in walked Persephone. Without saying a word, I ran up and wrapped her in the tightest hug. She just laughed as I held on. My trust in this woman skyrocketed after that and I knew I could trust her with anything. I hadn't realized that I was crying until she wiped away my tears. She was about to open her mouth to say something when I cut her off. One simple word caused her smile to brighten up. "Orpheus."

"You got his name?" Violently I shook my head at her. If it wasn't for that tea who knows if I would have ever remembered that. She led me over to my bed to sit down. "What else do you remember?"

I told her everything from the memory, down to the finest detail. She was hanging onto every word as if her life depended on it. I had started crying again as I told the story but I was just so happy to have this memory back. While Orpheus and I may have not met in the most "traditional" of ways it was us and I wouldn't trade it for the world. "Thank you."

She just smiled and told me to get dressed. She had brought me some clothes to wear, it was a pair of ripped up blue jeans and a white button-up tee shirt. I had decided to tuck on side of the shirt into the jean and let the other side free. I threw on my boots and tired the neck scarf back on.

Persephone lead me up to her "office" as she likes to call it. What it really is, is a gazebo in a garden she has down her. When I asked her how her garden was so full of light she just laughed at me. "Don't underestimate my powers dear." She led me over to a little table that looked like it had some tea and snack. "Today we are going to be talking about memory retaining and how to dig into your memories when you are awake." I noticed that her eyes drifted up and she shot a smile over my shoulder.

Turning to look I saw it was Mr. Hades. He just sent his wife a dashing smile and went on his way. "How is he so okay with you pulling me from the mines?" This question had been on my mind since she told me I was going to be her "assistant"

"I have him wrapped around my finger right now," her voice was full of laughter. "He is trying to make up for all of the mistakes that he has made in the past few years. It's like we are kids again. We are in love again."

"Why did you fall out of love with him?" Her face dropped slightly at the bad memories.

"It wasn't that I fell out of love with him it was just...things were changing here and I didn't agree with it. He was becoming a different man, someone I feared. I never feared that he would harm me in any way but the things he was doing...they were things the man that I loved would ever do." She paused taking a deep breath to calm herself.

"He would come to get me from up top earlier and earlier every year. He wouldn't let me do my job, he was robbing me of my independence. While I loved being with him it was becoming hard because I felt like I was nothing other than a trophy. He stopped taking me on dates, he stopped reaching for me. I watched his love for me slowly get clouded by industry."

She looked at me and shot me a sad smile. "It wasn't until your Orpheus that we finally made our way back to each other. If it wasn't for him...I don't know how much longer I would have survived down here with Hades." She reached out and grasped my hand lightly. "That is why I am helping you. He brought my husband back to me. He awoke a part of me that I thought I lost years ago. He brought Hades and me back to life. The least I can do is fix my husband's mistake."

The rest of the day we sat and discussed how I can work on meditating to help open my mind. She taught me that meditating will help the tea to get deeper memories. We also just spent the day enjoying each other's company. She told me stories of her and Hades when they were younger. It was sweet to hear stories about them. Her face lit up talking about those times, she was really happy. I can't wait till I'm that happy again.

The sound of the end of the day work whistle rung through the air. Persephone told me that it was time for me to go home as she had a dinner date with her husband. She gave me some of the teabags with instructions on how to make it. I couldn't help the smile that was on my face as I walked home. My life was starting to turn around. What did I do to deserve this?

I know there is one person that I can thank for this help. Without his song, Hades and Persephone would still be at odds. Without his song, Persephone wouldn't want to help me. My poet. My Orpheus.

What did I do to deserve such a man like him? From what little bit I can remember so far and the story from Persephone he sounds incredible. He sounds way better than I ever way. I was just a run-away and he was the one who saved the world. I know that when I get home I am going to make sure I spend every second letting him know how amazing he is.

As I sipped the tea, another petal fell off the flower. I'm getting another day closer to seeing him. One more day closer till I am in the arms of my Orpheus.

#hadestown #hadestown fanfic #fanfic #promises #orpheus #eurydice #hermes #hades #persephone

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beneathtreemomo · 5 years ago

Note

For the character thing!! Yukimura Hyouga, Gouenji, Kidou, OH and that guy, Fidio Aldena, was his name? Along with Fudou. (I have to run and sleep, so goodnight ^_^)

Night night hun! Sleep well and talk to you tomorrow/later today! The rest are under the cut!Yukimura Hyouga: How I feel about this character: He is a precious smol snow leopard cub with a mischievous streak a mile wide by the time he turns 15 and I will fight canon for his backstory and give him the best one possible in fanfic where he is loved and just grumpy instead of betrayed and hurt like too many kids in this series are. (in short: PRECIOUS BABY WILL LOVE AND PROTECT) All the people I ship romantically w/ him: Never actually crossed my mind to ship him with anyone (probably because in Yoru’s universe he’s still 5 and hasn’t had to deal with it yet xD) BUT I read your fic and now I will gladly ship him with Itetsuki because the way you write them is pure adorable. Non-romantic OTP w/ him: I am a firm shipper of Hyogua & Hakuren, Hyouga & Healing, and Hyouga & Fubuki bros. Just soft healthy platonic relationships all around :3 Unpopular Opinion of him: ?????? I don’t know?????? I’m not into fandom stuff idk what their opinions of him are xD. I guess mine is that he had a childhood crush on Fubuki that later turned into him putting him on a pedestal. Like, the type of crush that your friend’s little sibling or the kid you babysit has where they insist they’ll marry you when they’re older. Not an actual romantic crush during his teens. And then he ended up transitioning from a crush to hero-worship since Fubuki is probably the first adult to believe in him/ see his potential in a long time. So that would lead to him feeling betrayed when Fubuki suddenly disappears off the grid w/o so much as a goodbye. One thing I wish had happened in canon: LITERALLY ANY BACKSTORY PAST SHIROU TRAINING HIM. ACTUAL INTERACTIONS BETWEEN HIM AND HIS TEAM. MORE OF HIM AND HIS TEAM AFTER THE MATCH WITH RAIMON.

Gouenji Shuuya How I feel about him: Cool loner boi with a heart of gold and daddy issues who isn’t actually a loner and would die or kill for his friends and family and I would gladly be his friend if I met him. Hopefully. If not friends I’d still have mad respect for the kid if he just let down some of those walls. Romance ships: Honestly the only romantic ship I can get behind with him is Shirou because A) Fire and Ice, B) they compliment each other so well, and C) THE CHEMISTRY. Like, they’re just perfect for each other in a way that’s so subtle but so caring and it’s really hard for me to see either of them with anyone else after it. Non-romantic ships: Break Trio, Gouenji & Yuuka (loving sibling relationship ftw!), Gouenji & Toramaru. I don’t really know what else to say, I love their dynamics, I just don’t see them as more than friends xD And again: HEALTHY LOVING SIBLING RELATIONSHIPS FOR THE WIN Unpopular Opinion: ….. another I don’t know, I’m afraid xD Even more so since I don’t have a single clue what fanon even does to him, really. I guess... that maybe when the situation call for it he shows more than a tick of a smile? Like, it’s probably OoC but I feel like if he needs to talk to someone about something super important (like, for instance, Shirou’s mental breakdown after Okinawa) he’d end up expressing a lot more than he lets on. He may keep his emotions from showing on his face, but I feel like he’d accidentally let more slip in both expression and tone if he’s focused on something else. One thing in canon: More of his struggle in his stay w/ Hijitaka would have been nice. Especially with the younger kids! Gouenji’s so soft with kids, it’s adorable!Kidou Yuuto How I feel about him: Eh, he’s ok I guess xD Honestly can’t even think of a silly thing to say about him even though I know there are plenty out there. He’s just... not that spectacular to me. Don’t get me wrong-- he’s really cool! A really good strategist and his struggles with coming out from under Kageyama’s control make for an interesting character! He’s just not a fav or a character I feel strongly about. Romance ships: Wow this is really showing my one-track “faves only” brain because I honestly never thought about it???? I guess maybe I can see something with Sakuma? But honestly I can’t see him or don’t really want to see him romantically with any of the characters. Non-romantic: Break Trio, Kidou & Teikoku, Kidou & Otonashi, Kidou & Fudou. Some nice deep friendships and another healthy sibling relationship after they’ve been separated for at least a few years? Heck yeah, sign me up! Unpopular Opinion: Honestly I wouldn’t be surprised if me not finding him all that amazing is an unpopular opinion xD I don’t even know why I’m not a fan of him, but I’m not! *shrugs* just happened to be the way the cards fell, I guess. One thing in canon: Uhhh more home life outside of the team? Him and Otonashi starting to reconnect outside of school would have been nice. *gasp* it would have been awesome to see him hanging out with Teikoku casually after he transfered to Raimon!Fideo Ardena How I feel: He’s a cutie! I love how he’s so interesting in Endou (and by proxy, InaJapan) and honestly while I wasn’t super interested in other teams the first time I watched Inazuma Eleven, after nearly a decade and actually getting a friend who’s from Italy, it made me so dang happy to see him! I was just like “Hey!!! He’s from ‘Milla’s country!!! Yay go Fideo!!!” and idk I’ve had a soft spot for him since xD Romance ships: Another don’t have ‘em character, sorry xD I guess I can see him having a bit of a crush on Endou, but also feel free to ask me this again once his appearances in the show are fresh in my mind xD Non-romantic ships: Fideo & Orpheus and Fideo & Rushe! A shame they weren’t close in the anime; I would have liked to see that. Unpopular Opinion: N/A; I don’t know enough about fanon or about him to give an opinion, sorry xD One thing in canon: HIS! RELATIONSHIP! WITH! RUSHE! were they actual siblings? how did they meet? WHY WAS HE THE ONE SHE WAS CLOSE TO IN THE GAME. WHY NOT ORPHEUS IN GENERAL?!Fudou Akio How I feel: He is a little gremlin who acts like being mean and angry at everyone is fun but actually he’s just a prickly pear cactus protecting himself from others in case he gets hurt again and while he’s a jerk he’s actually super cool and his jerk-ness is acceptable. (in short: *in the tune of He’s A Tramp* he’s a jerk but I like him) Romance ships: Don’t have any! He’s too prickly with everyone xD I mean, him and Kidou are cute but I can’t see it as romantic as it’s too near “well, I guess you aren’t as much of a jerk as I thought, but I still can’t trust you” for me. Sure, they work out their differences, but idk it’s too hard to see as romantic xD Non-romantic: Kidou & Fudou, Fudou & Teikoku, Fudou & OG Hiroto, basically everyone who went “Oh come ON” since they weren’t stuck in the past w/ him and the others were screwing up perfectly reachable passes when Fudou was finally allowed to play in a match in FFI. Unpopular Opinion: another N/A, sorry! One thing in canon: I would have loved to actually see him trying to form friendships instead of always being a loner? Like, he gets close enough to them to be friends eventually, but we never actually get to see it? And that makes me a little sad. All we really see is him kinda pushing the others away while saying slightly less mean things to them and him and Kidou coming to an understanding, and idk I just feel like seeing him interacting more with the team off field w/o someone getting a bit mad or disgruntled would have been nice.Thank you for asking about these guys!

#ask mo and co.

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nyanzaya · 5 years ago

Text

Aiko

Requested: @if-that-so words: 2637

Iza was at the hospital. Zuo’s mother had been in a hit and run and the black feline was the one who was called. Why Zuo hadn’t been called, Iza would never know but he went. He told the group he was part of that he was going to the hospital and the responses he got were from them being worried and how a young girl named Melody was going to come to the hospital.

The feline didn’t need her there with him. He didn’t know her even if she called him uncle. When her message about family and how they shouldn’t hide secrets Iza thought it was stupid. He didn’t know anything about her or if she even had a family, but Iza would never consider her family; of course, friends should be considered family, right?

Perhaps.

Iza was a stubborn man. He been alone for far too long to even consider anyone family. It was always something he would envy about people. At least they knew their parents and siblings. Who did Iza have? Aiko. Zuo’s mother.

She was the closest thing Iza had to a parent.

Right now Iza was sitting outside the operating room waiting for any type of news from the doctors. Anxiously he was waiting, his leg bouncing his elbows on his knees and hands folded in front of him. He heard from the nurses that someone had hit her with their car and took off before leaving him to his own devices.

How could anyone hit a neko and leave like that?

This was why Iza hated humans. They had always treated his kin as lower than human, and more like animals. The nurses were sweet, kind and apologetic about what had happened to Aiko. Iza returned a sad smile and thanked them before getting lost in thoughts.

“Excuse me.” Spoke a soft voice.

“Hello, excuse me.” They spoke again this time waving a hand in front of the black feline’s face and seeing them become startled, she quickly apologized. “Sorry for scaring you, but if you want to see your mother she is in room 213.”

An ear flicked at her words and Iza stood up to bow. “Thank you.” Quickly he left to find the room number.

Iza was afraid to see Aiko truthfully. He was afraid to see her hooked up to machines and in a cast and bandages. He was afraid of hospitals and being in one to see someone dear to him felt heavy on his shoulders, his chest and his heart. Iza wished Zuo was here with him but the cream-colored feline in question was out on a job.

Going down long hallways, looking for the room number was difficult. Iza wanted to turn around and go home. Do what he always did and fixed things without confronting the issue. He knew the issue. He knew that he shouldn’t run away from things when things felt so terrifying and made his chest clutch and the pit of his stomach feel heavy with hurt. He knew that he had to see Aiko in place of Zuo. If he was the one called they must have been a reason for it.

Standing in front of the door, looking at the numbers. 213. It was the room, he could smell her scent. Iza brought his hand to the numbers, feeling them to remind himself that he was really there. Then he knocked on the door and opened it. He could feel the anxiety in his chest intensify and he was starting to shake.

Then he saw her. As he suspected. She was hooked to a machine and a cast on her leg and arm, her tail was covered in bandages. Her face had a patch on her cheek. Aiko was a beautiful cat if she wasn’t injured. She stirred, opening hazel eyes to meet garnet. Aiko gave a weak smile, “Izzy...you came.”

Iza swallowed a lump in his throat that he hadn’t realized formed seeing Aiko. “Of course. I wouldn’t leave you here all alone, yeah?” The black feline, struggled to speak, his voice wavered.

“Come here..sit down.” She gestured towards a chair with her good hand.

The black feline didn’t hesitate reaching for a chair and pulling it to her bedside. He took her hand to hold in his. Her hand was soft, despite what had happened to her. “Why didn’t you call Zuo here?” Iza couldn’t help but ask her.

The white feline took her hand back, bringing it to Iza’s face, “Why do you ask that Izzy? I haven’t seen you in so long, of course, this isn’t the way I wanted us to see each other again.”

Iza leaned into her touch feeling her thumb caress his cheek. He averted his gaze, not wanting to look at the person he considered to be his mother. “I don’t know… I thought maybe because Zuo didn’t pick up or something.” The feline spoke, bringing his hand to his eyes to rub them starting to feel the sting of tears prick. “I know that too. Sorry I haven’t visited you lately.”

“Don’t apologize, it’s okay. I know you are busy with work, right? You and Zuo work together is what he told me. I just thought he was busy since the doctors told me he didn’t pick up his phone.”

The black feline’s ears turned to the side. He was the one that gave Zuo a job but how was he supposed to know that Aiko would have gotten injured?

Aiko moved her hand upward to catch a tear. “Why are you crying, Izzy?”

Iza didn’t say anything yet, taking a deep breath and exhaled a shaky sigh. “I- I just can’t stand to see you hurt like this, Mom.”

“That’s why you’re sitting right?”

“Wha?”

“It was just an accident, don’t you think?” Aiko asked seeing how taken aback he was at her light joke. It was clear that Iza wasn’t expected such a light-hearted comment considering the situation.

“It wasn’t. It wasn’t an accident. They hit you and drove off, Mom.” Iza spoke, the tears escaping and running down. Taking her hand to hold it in both hands, his grip tightened at the thought of those people hurting Aiko. He wanted to make them pay for what they did. He didn’t care if it wasn’t what Aiko would want. He didn’t care if the people that hit her were some stupid teenagers that weren’t paying attention. All he cared about was keeping his mother safe.

Aiko frowned. She knew it wasn’t an accident. She knew that they must have been drunk or blind if they were driving so recklessly. Feeling Iza’s grip on her hand, she carefully leaned forward to bump her forehead onto his. “I know, dear, but please don’t hurt them.”

Iza flinched at her words. It was as if she knew what he was thinking. He pulled away and held her hand with one hand, while the other was brought to his face to fight the tears from falling. “But why. Why would you want them to get away with what they had done to you?”

The white feline, gave a soft smile and returned to pressing her back against the bedding. “Because there is so much hate in this world, Izzy. I can see it in your eyes that you hold a lot of hurt and hatred, but sometimes things happen and you can’t change it like me being in this hospital right now.”

He listened, but he didn’t like what he heard.

“Sometimes some things don’t need a reaction. Sometimes it’s better to let it go. Would you hold onto a rope that is burning your hand?”

Iza shook his head no. “But what about Zuo? He would go after those people.”

Aiko gave a soft laugh, “Ah.. that’s why he has you doesn’t he?”

The black feline’s ears laid back again. “No.. we aren’t together anymore.”

The white feline tilted her head. “What? How come?”

“We decided it would just be better if we were apart. Something about differences.” Iza was vague about it, not wanting to worry Aiko. “But we still work together. You know?” He gave a soft laugh, one that hurt.

Aiko frowned, “I thought you two were so cute together. The little fights but then how you two held each other close. It was a good match.”

Iza felt his heart drop again at her words. He would be lying if he didn’t miss being with Zuo but he couldn’t bring himself to stay with him. The feline didn’t want to change him into something he wasn’t. He already had before and he realized his mistake. He created something that wasn’t the man he loved. “Ah-ahh yeah, you know, sometimes love doesn’t work out.”

“What about your friends? Did you get some, Sweetie?” She asked and took her hand to bring it to Iza’s ears lighting petting and tugging at his ear. Aiko hoped Iza made some friends. Last time she had seen the black feline was almost a year ago and knew that he and Zuo lived together, though she had never heard of any friends he might of had.

The younger feline gave a light laugh before taking his ear back, flicking it. Friends? A few came to mind. Saya, Ryan, Luke, Orpheus, Nobu, Rook… By extension did that include Grimm? He thought about it for a moment. Honestly, Iza wasn’t sure if any of them were his friends. They were people he spent time with and enjoyed being around.

Of course they were his friends. What was he thinking?

“Ah… yeah I got some.”

“Oh that’s great to hear. I was afraid that you were all alone.”

Iza looked down again. “It’s just…”

His trailed off words made Aiko’s ears perk up.

“I had a fight with one of them and I don’t...really know how to apologize. They were really angry with me.”

Aiko gave a hum, “Well, that’s no good is it?”

Iza shook his head, starting to tear up again.

“Hmm… I think you should just go see them and really say sorry to their face. Most people like it face to face, right?”

The black feline gave a shaky sigh, “Y-yeah.. But I don’t think he wants to see my face ever again. I said horrible things to him.”

Aiko frowned, “If you really care about them you would say sorry, right? You should keep your friends close. It’s lonely in this world, Izzy. Sometimes all you can really have in the end is the people that care about you.”

“But I think I pushed him to the point where he doesn’t care anymore. He only cared because his girlfriend is a close friend of mine.”

The white feline nodded giving a hum. “I was in a situation like this before.” She said taking her hand back, putting it to her mouth.

Iza simply watched her, wondering what she had done in that kind of situation. When she was quiet for too long Iza spoke up, “What did you do?”

Aiko places her hand on her leg, “The obviously thing, Hun. I went to them and apologized. I put my heart into it.”

The younger feline made a face, one that Aiko has to laugh at, “Ooh, Dear. You really don’t apologize to people, do you?”

“Why should I apologize when it was their fault? He was the one egging the other guy on and kept picking a fight with them.” Iza huffed, crossing his arms over his chest.

Aiko sighed, she forgot how childish Iza was. She remembered the fights he and Zuo would have and often she would tell him to simply apologize and Zuo would get over it. Of course, Iza was the reluctant type but also the type that would cry over a bruised feeling that he would hold onto. “Does it really matter? Please, Izzy, if you won’t do it for him, can you do it for me? I don’t want you to be all alone because you didn’t want to let people help you or because you didn’t want to let them love you. I know you’re hurt deeply but we need people. I’m sure you know that, Dear, but it’s not a curse or something to hate. It’s good to be with people even if they can be horrible things. I just want you to be happy.”

Iza listened to her. She was right. It didn’t matter in the end; though, he was going to do it for his mother. Not for Grimm or because Saya wanted them to get along even if she explained that it shouldn’t be up to her to correct it. Iza knew that Saya could never be whole if he kept up this one sided feud. Perhaps he was bored, had no more excitement in his life if he picked wanted to keep this one sided hate. He knew Grimm didn’t care anymore, so why should he?

Did it even matter if Grimm accepted the apology? Iza mused that it didn’t as long as he apologized and meant it. As much as he hated to admit, his mother was right. They needed people because without them they, they wouldn’t be who they are but perhaps that was an innocent mentality. Iza knew the whole truth. His kin were less than humans in the eyes of some people.

Iza looked at Aiko with soft eyes, a sadness behind them, a soft smile, hiding how he felt. “I know, it’s just… hard sometimes after all that I have been through. I just fear that they would just want to use me and then take over my body because I’m free. It’s hard for me to trust people, Mom.”

“We aren’t free Izzy. You know we will never be. At least, in my life time we won’t ever be a free people, but don’t let that fear hold you back, Sweetheart. Use it and turn it into something for the greater good.” Aiko explain further, to which Iza nodded and looked at the time.

He stood up, “I’m sorry I had to cut this short, but I’ll come see you again soon, okay?” Iza said reaching for her hand to press a kiss on her knuckles.

“I’ll be waiting then, don’t leave me waiting too long you hear?” She spoke watching Iza leave. He simply waved her off, but Aiko felt better. At least she had gotten to see one of her kittens, even if Iza wasn’t her child.

It was almost as if a light had be shown. Iza knew what he had to do and with the advice from his adoptive mother in mind he was going to do it, though he disobeyed.

He returned home with revenge in mind. Iza wasn’t as kind as Aiko. Iza wasn’t soft or gentle towards people. Iza wasn’t one to let himself get pushed around anymore. No, Iza didn’t always listen, finding that he belonged in the dark, underground and hidden, especially his emotions that would bottle up too much before exploding, and today his emotions had reached a breaking point. He was on his laptop searching for when his mother had gotten hit and once he had, he traced the license plate and would make sure the same happened to them.

It was an easy stunt and within the week karma had been returned.

Ah, Iza knew karma would come for him next, teach him another lesson but he didn’t care. Everything that had happened to him wouldn’t be any worse than what karma would do to him. Karma was a joke after all. Iza gave himself bad luck, yet always found himself to be lucky.

His only problem now was to apologize.

#this is just *Clutches heart*#ITS SOO RARE THAT YOU GET TO READ IZA CRYING #if-that-so #Drabbles

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iphgenias · 6 years ago

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❧ you say wicked like it’s something bad, but you still can’t help but watch me do it ❧

❝ I dream nights and girls like tigers, claws and teeth on both. ❞ LULU ANTARIKSA? No, that’s actually IPHIGENIA ‘GENIE’ ROWLE. A SEVENTH YEAR student, this SLYTHERIN student is sided with THE DEATH EATERS. SHE identifies as CIS WOMAN and is a PURE BLOOD who is known to be PETTY, VINDICTIVE, and UNSCRUPULOUS but also VIVACIOUS, CREATIVE, and PERCEPTIVE. { JANE, TWENTY TWO, NZT, SHE/HER }

here comes the demon

meet genie rowle, daughter of cadfael rowle and deianeira urquhart

in greek mythology, iphigenia is the daughter agamemnon offers in sacrifice —- this iphigenia has no intention of being anyone’s sacrifice, but she’s not opposed to the idea of anyone sacrificing themselves for her

the urquharts have like... this thing of naming themselves after greek mythological figures, but like, exclusively ones with a tragic ending

which.... ya they don’t unpack that fdshjksahj

an actual conversation cadfael & deianeira probably had abt naming genie: cadfael: how about ariadne— deianeira: too happy of an ending cadfael: she got left behind on an island by the man she betrayed her family for deianeira: what’s your point

anyway the rowles go for Welsh™ names usually but cadfael’s whole generation sorta just went fuck that and took other naming traditions, resulting in lo and wes having largely normal names, and then genie’s branch deciding to take her mother’s naming traditions (weird as they may be) & also there’s another branch that married a cornish pureblood and went exclusively w hectic cornish names

probably an only child, though it’s possible genie’s mother is her father’s second wife, and there could be an older half brother (would probably need to be younger than lo, though, who’s 24, and definitely younger than wes, 26) running around, but he’d need to be #Committed to the DE life —- we already have one rowle risking it all as a double agent, and this family (esp genie’s branch) is Too Extra™ to have multiple

genie is spoilt, petty, vindictive and has... pretty much no moral qualms. she’s generous, though, with her friends, and fiercely loyal to her family.

when she was younger, she had a... rebellious streak might be too generous a term, because no part of her ever felt any inclination to contend with her privileged position, but there was a certain freedom to her position in the family, the youngest of the cousins and a girl —- whereas all eyes were on wes, the heir, the truth, genie was allowed to run a little more wild. nothing not befitting a rowle, of course, for that would not do, but she had more freedom to act as she pleased, to say whatever she liked, to keep her running muttered commentary going during the galas, to suggest wicked plots for her own amusement. genie rowle was always unconcerned with what was fair or right, but she was fun and clever and wicked funny, and was willing to put all her devilish tactics to the good use of entertaining a friend when the fancy took her. children are often vaguely terrible, and these privileged purebloods more than most —- genie was far from an exception, and when she was your friend, she was easy to love for it

hogwarts, though, that’s where the naughtiness thrives

slytherin through and through —- not necessarily a bad thing, but on genie, this looks like the worst thing

most frequently can be found alongside gemma gamp ( g&g! ), her partner in crime, and the rest of the mean girl gang: odilia travers, sarah’s-tbd, maddison bulstrode & leonie-tbd. also often fucking around w people

bullying tw // luvs psychological warfare and the ‘hot & cold’ method, which is what she uses against ppl like isa weasley: flusters her w her presence and prettiness & then calls her by the wrong name and says undermining things to first turn her on and then remind her how meaningless she is! ( viv vc: fuck OFF leave isa ALONE // james vc: ??? constantly amazed by how wrong some ppl are // katya vc: ah, bullying. something new and exciting from my dormmates ) // end tw

but also just. is mean. hot n cold is one fun way 4 her to garner entertainment from ppl but rly, whatever takes her fancy is how she’ll go for it

usually it’s just for fun bc she gets a kick out of it but! she’s coming 4 u annie delacour-bardon for thinking u can move in on gemma’s territory! who cares if gemma didn’t want scor anymore, obvs nobody else could have him either

also she’s part of the DEs, so her various talents are available for their use —- while she is not a leader, she’s part of the same crew as all the current leaders, which suits her perfectly, tbh? she doesn’t want to be a leader... but she does love the clout that comes with being close to them & also using her position to push people to do things to ‘prove themselves’ without them rly having a chance to push her back (ofc, they’re welcome to —- it’s just a) easy for her to prove herself bc like... she doesn’t care abt the well-being of some mudbloods lol and b) given that she’s so tight with the leaders, pushing her to ‘prove herself’ in response to her suggesting you ought to is more likely to cast aspersions on your trustworthiness than hers)

just like wes, prefers getting other people to do her dirty work for her... she’ll do all the psychological stuff and bullying for sure, but she’s less inclined towards physical violence or anything or the like —- that’s more odilia’s or sarah-tbd’s domain? also even just minor things, she likes getting other people to do things for her, it’s a power thing (not her girls — well, maybe maddison — but like... weaker people DFJHSJH)

anyway she’s the fucking worst

the mean girls r demons!

death tw // the rowles are pretty hardcore —- wes and lo are (currently unbeknownst to wes) locked in a war that. well wes is a DE and lo is doublecrossing the DEs so! anyway either lo survives the war w/o being found out or wes is gonna organise her murder when he finds out and he’ll do it by playing the long game, pretending to her face that they’re still fine, all the while plotting her death. SO. that’s one half of genie’s fam! // end tw

the other half are the urquharts, who’re known for obtaining objects for the underground market, particularly historical wixen artefacts. traditionally, the eldest male has been the ‘face’ of the family, being respectable in public and also being the one who handles transactions and makes deals and sells off their findings or obtains requests for them. either a secondary branch or a younger sibling has traditionally been the head of expeditions, sent all around the world to uncover these things for this illegal trade. crime & curse breaking, therefore, have always run in the family.

her uncle, orpheus urquhart, was recently violently attacked (he’s a DE supporter/benefactor in terms of bankrolling things so like.... he’s gross!) & catch her in the lockdown being both outraged ppl would have the audacity to attack him and have room in her naughty self to be absolutely awful to poor yuri

she’s pan w/ a pref for girls, but rly anything goes. uses sex and associated affections for two main purposes, enjoyment & manipulation

nsfw // genie vc: my pussy is a power move // end nsfw

i imagine she primarily considers the mean girls her friends now, but certainly when she was younger, going back to that paragraph i wrote above, there’s like... more room for camaraderie? like w charles, they were friends when they were younger and now... both slythersevenths but she’s a demon! so there’s room for that kind of thing, and also ya sexual situations, and genie is always down to have fucked w someone, which could absolutely be emotionally —- she’s definitely the type to use sympathy/affection/gestures associated w humanity to like... manipulate people

just. the worst

no wonder violet wants to punch her

tragically is the safest / has best chance of survvial & well-being of all my characters, which is so cursed

calls al potter “daddy” bc obvs she doesn’t consider him a viable sexual prospect ( genie vc: he acts like a 90yo man and isn’t even as rich as one??? pass, so boring ) but it makes him way more uncomfortable than it bothers her to think of him as a sexual prospect, so! prime time 4 her

she’s basically awful to everyone the rest of my characters love w their whole hearts, and then she only cares abt the ones they don’t like

she does have this like... not caring exactly but for people like charles, who was her friend once, and the other slythersevenths she considers part of their crowd (esp seeing as the girls hung out w the slytherin sports boys before gemma/scor broke up), there’s a sense of almost. possessiveness? like, she’s not nice to them, but they’re largely hers to fuck with... so watch her be a total demon to vi when varlie happens

anyway i have to be up in 6 hrs so! this will have 2 be enough, sorry abt her, she’s a demon, but i hope she can be helpful 4 plots alongside her other demon besties

#iidyintro #finally!!!!!#also LMAO this is actually new but i'll repost or rb my other ones later

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bespangeled · 8 years ago

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Buffyverse tagging meme: I was tagged by @rorysummersblog and @alkenifanfiction and @lucious Thank you- I wriggle like a puppy while I am answering. Damn, my life needs a life...

top fifteen characters (in no particular order)

1. Wesley 2. Spike 3. Angel 4. Faith 5. Giles 6.Tara 7. Buffy 8. Lilah 9. Oz 10. Xander 11. Willow 12. Lorne 13. Illyria 14. Cordelia 15.Gunn

favorite minor characters?

Ethan Rayne, Drusilla, Darla, Clem, Cassie, Vi, Amy, Jenny,

ranking of favorite seasons of both shows

ATS: 5, 3, 2, 1, 4 BTVS: 2, 6, 5, 7 , 3, 4, 1

top ten episodes of both shows - this is based on what I would watch, not on the episode quality (in no particular order - depends on my mood)

ATS: Reunion, Redefinition, Billy, Loyalty, Orpheus (entire arc is really one episode so I’ll say they are all tied), Deep Down, Destiny, You’re Welcome, TGIQ (Spangel fan here), Damage,

BTVS: Becoming 1&2, Lie To Me, Passion, Fool For Love, The Gift, OMWF, Normal Again, LMPTM, Beneath You, Band Candy

ats or btvs? ats (but it cycles)

least favorite main character?

I hate to say it, but the more I watch the more later season Fred gets on my nerves

top ten ships?

Spangel, Weslah, Fuffy, Spuffy, Xandelia, Tillow, Spesley, Spiles, Spander, Cangel

do you write fanfic?

Yup - mostly m/m or vignettes

what fanfic do you read?

Spike/Angel, Spike/Giles, Spike/Wesley, Spike/Ethan, Spike/Dean Winchester - with some Spike/Xander creeping in - you might notice a pattern here. Some mild Spuffy - lots and lots of gen fic - anything written with snark and excellent voices, or wrenching grief, kinda depends on my mood. Not that big on graphic sex - I prefer stories that explore characters

A few favorites:

The Relevance of Spike - stakeaclaim - this is the way season 5 Angel should have gone. The Relevance of Spike - Author: stakeaclaim - "It was a big day. A hundred and twenty-five years. A quarter of the way through his second century and he’d decided today was the day it was all going to change" And it all does change, though not in ways any reader could expect. It's long, unpredictable, and intricate, and it will keep you up all night reading. Spike/Angel

Go No More A-Roving - thea_bromine - Warnings – this is a Deathfic. Mind you, it’s largely about Spike, so it would be a Deathfic on account of Spike not being altogether alive. However, I’m warning you, death happens to a major character. Well, to Giles. Both beautifully written, and quite funny, with excellent voices. If you had the chance to live on would you do it in a vampire’s body? Even if it means sharing that body with it’s owner - Spike? It has a sequel on the same page with WWP as a main character - filled with delicious snark. Giles/Spike (but not in the usual way)

Three Lions - Lesley - Takes place after season six, in England where Giles tries to help and angry Willow, and a newly souled vampire whose mood veers between Italian widow and Mickey Mouse on crack. Throw in WWP escaping from stalker Lilah and you have a recipe for disaster. Funny but deeper and more layered than it sounds - warning Death of a major character. Gen fic

Siren Song - Morgana - Picks up after Twihard, but there’s a reason Dean was throwing up after he took the cure - it didn’t take. He’s left a vampire, and while he tries to ignore it, that turns out to be a very bad idea. At the end of his rope, Sam calls on an old contact of their father’s, who promises to send them help in the form of a vampire expert. Problem is, they didn’t expect the vampire expert to be a vampire himself! Dean is forced to spend some time with his new mentor, learning about what it means to be a vampire, from blood (which he doesn’t want to drink) to sires (which he doesn’t have) and more. Spike/Dean, Xander/Sam when did you start watching? About 8 years ago - when I became disabled my younger daughter made me watch Buffy, and I was hooked. The show and fandom gave me someting to put my energy into as I went through the healing process. I watched “Angel” afterwards - also under protest. That’s where my main ships set sail - Spangel, and Weslah.

show recommendations for Buffyverse fans? I have odd taste in shows so not sure if they will appeal

Vikings - history channel - interesting characters and kick-ass women (Lagertha in particular)

Shameless (on Netflix) - that same sense of community as a family of poor kids struggle to survive without parents - filled with humor, and snark. If you have ever been a poor urban kid, you will find yourself here.

Goblin: The Lonely and Great God - Kdrama - another one of my daughters but a Korean Goblin and a Reaper are so shippable! (same daughter XD)

do you own/collect anything related to the shows? Just CDs my daughter ripped from her box set

how often will you watch an episode? When I’m in the mood - it can be several times a week, or not for months

how many times have you watched either show all the way through? I think 3 times - maybe 4

five unpopular opinions?

1. When something is wrong with the show, Spike is not always to blame - if Spike is your all purpose scapegoat then go away.

2. Bangel and Spuffy were both extremely dysfunctional relationships by any normal standard. What Angel did to Buffy was just as bad as the ar

3. Characters are more interesting when they screw up - and it’s still okay to be upset by choices they make.

4. Fred/Gunn slowly drains the life out of Fred, and she never quite makes it back. Fred/Wesley is not about love, it’s about adoration and worship

5. Wesely/Lilah is the hottest relationship in the B-verse.

least favorite thing about the fandom?

The whole beware Spike fans - Spike fans are waiting to kick your puppy, spoil your milk, and burn your house to the ground with your whole family inside. They are a single organism with one opinion and in control of fandom. We are all being victimized by Spike fans, and their foul, evil ways. We hates em - we hates em all...I mean, dislike the character and I can understand if not agree, but lately i am running into stuff about Spike fans. Disliking real people on the basis of a who just seems weird, and sad.

I tag @silverspike, @baudown @restfield @cortexifansquint, @captain-peroxide-pest, @feliciacraft, @carry-on-my-wayward-wesley, @catty-words @gwendolenau, @demandingbillydolls, @soulfulspikethekiller @comlodge and anyone else who wants to!

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weekendwarriorblog · 6 years ago

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WHAT TO WATCH THIS WEEKEND April 26, 2019 - AVENGERS: ENDGAME!!!

This is the big one, the start of the summer movie season – like last year, one week early – but also a singularly movie that is likely to crush pretty much everything still playing in theaters, and that is…

AVENGERS: ENDGAME!!

What’s being promoted as the finale of storylines that have been set-up over ten years of Marvel movies finally hits theaters one year after the fateful ending of Infinity War. Sadly, I won’t be seeing this until early next week, since I’ll be busy attending the Tribeca Film Festival over the weekend. (See more details about that below.)

Still, it’s hard to deny the draw of a sequel to last year’s Avengers: Endgame, which had such an astounding cliffhanger ending that few will want to wait to see this one, mainly to see how the surviving heroes deal with Thanos and get their friends and colleagues back.

I guess that’s all I have to say about the movie (other than my box office analysis at The Beat), until I see it so let’s get straight to the…

LIMITED RELEASES

If you live in New York, I beseech you to go see Pamela Green’s doc BE NATURAL: THE UNTOLD STORY OF ALICE GUY-BLACHÉ (Zeitgeist Films), narrated by Jodi Foster, when it opens in New York on Friday. It will open at the IFC Center in New York plus a few other cities as it slowly expands to other cities. It’s an amazing story about the first-ever female filmmaker who was around during the earliest days of cinema in France.

Ralph Fiennes’ directs and co-stars in THE WHITE CROW (Sony Pictures Classics), an amazing film starring Oleg Ivenko as ballet dancer Rudolf Nureyev, who travelled to Paris with his ballet company, ended up meeting and falling in love with Clara Saint (Adèle Exarchopoulos) and defecting. Fiennes plays Nureyev’s early teacher, but it’s a fairly small role as he allows his younger cast to shine in a terrific story that covers much of Nureyev’s early life before defecting. It’s a fantastic film, regardless of whether you’re into ballet or not. The White Crowopens in New York and L.A. on Friday.

Not quite as amazing (but a movie I had been looking forward to seeing since Toronto last year) is Justin Kelly’s JT LEROY (Universal Home Entertainment), which stars Kristen Stewart as Savannah Knoop, the young woman who pretended to be author J.T. Leroy, an abused transgender young man, who was duped by actual author Laura Albert (played by Laura Dern) to help fulfill the ruse for the press and other celebrities. Jim Sturgess plays Geoffrey Knoop, Laura’s boyfriend and Savannah’s brother while Diane Kruger plays Eva, a character clearly meant to be Asia Argento, who made The Heart is Deceitful Above All Things based on “Leroy’s” novel. I was very interested in this film, partially because I interviewed Argento for that film without knowing the story until seeing Jeff Feurzeig’s doc Author: The JT Leroy Story. The movie, co-written by Knoop and Kelly from her own book documenting events, is okay, but I feel that the screenplay could have been a lot more interesting if adapted by a better writer, and I’ve generally been mixed about Kelly’s work as a director, as well. I guess if you’re interested in this story, you can check this out in select cities or On Demand.

Josh Lobo’s thriller I TRAPPED THE DEVIL (IFC Midnight) stars Scott Poythress as Steve, a man who is holding a man hostage in his basement who he believes is the Devil himself. When his brother (AJ Bowen) and wife (Susan Burke) arrive for the Christmas season, they discover Steve’s secret and begin wondering if the man is in fact the Devil. I liked the movie’s premise more than the execution, as I didn’t think too much about the cast.

Roxanne Benjamin made her directorial debut as part of the horror anthology Southbound. She also had a segment in the XX anthology, and she now makes her feature film debut with BODY AT BRIGHTON ROCK (Magnet Releasing). It follows a young woman who is working as a summer employee at a state park, but who takes a wrong turn and ends up in a crime scene with no communication to the outside world. Bravely, she must spend the night in the wilderness protecting the crime scene on her own. 

Opening on Wednesday at Film Forum is Carmine Street Guitars (Abramorama), Ron Mann’s documentary about Rick Kelly’s West Village guitar shop that’s been where he and his apprentice Cindy Hulej design and build custom guitars for the musical superstars. Some of the guitarists who pop in and are captured on camera include Charlie Sexton, Marc Ribot, Lenny Kaye and Bill Frisell with a special appearance by Jim Jarmusch. If you’re into music or are a guitar player, you’ll want to check this out.

Maia Wechsler’s doc If the Dancer Dances (Monument Releasing) goes into the dance studio of Stephen Petronio as they try to breathe new life into Merce Cunningham’s 1968 piece “RainForest.” The movie is being released in conjunction with Cunningham’s centennial, opening Friday in New York at the Quadand in L.A. at the Laemmle Music Hall.

A Thousand Thoughts

LOCAL FESTIVALS

The big festival starting on Wednesday is the17thAnnual TRIBECA FILM FESTIVAL, which kicks off on Wednesday with Life, Animated director Roger Ross Williams’ new documentary The Apollo, which is having it World premiere AT the Apollo Theater in Harlem. Other special events held at the Beacon Theater, also far north of Tribeca, include the 35thAnniversary of This is Spinal Tap and 40th Anniversary of Francis Ford Coppola’s Apocalypse Now, a special talk between Tribeca co-founder Robert De Niro and his longtime director Martin Scorsese, as well as special concerts/talks following docs about the Wu Tang Clan (Wu Tang Clan: Of Mics and Men) and Phish frontman Trey Anastasio (Between Me and My Mind).

I’m not sure why, but I tend to gravitate more to the docs at Tribeca than the narratives, maybe because there have been maybe a dozen narratives at the festival that I truly loved. On the other hand, the festival has become renowned for so many amazing docs, and this year, there are goods ones about Stones bassist Bill Wyman (The Quiet One), Woodstock: Three Days That Defined a Generation, Maiden (about the first all-woman around-the-world sailing team), another one about movie sound (Making Waves) and one about a Ohio factory that shuts down but then is resuscitated by a Chinese company that offers the community new hope (American Factory). I’m also looking forward to seeing the doc Other Music, about New York’s indie record store which recently shut its doors. Add to that other music docs like Linda Ronstadt: The Sound of My Voice and Mystify: Michael Hutchence, and there’s quite a bit that I’m going to want to check out.

Some of the narratives that I’m interested include The Kill Team, starring Nat Wolff and Alexander Skarsgard, and Kevin McMullin’s Low Tide, which has its World Premiere. Also, soon-to-be-released movies like Mary (American Psycho) Harron’s Charlie Says, starring Mat Smith as Charles Manson, and Joe Berlinger’s Extremely Wicked, Shockingly Evil and Vile, starring Zac Efron as Ted Bundy, will screen at Tribeca before their respective releases on May 10.

Hopefully, I’ll find some more hidden gems as the festival progresses.

Up in Toronto, Canada, one of my favorite cities, this year’s Hot Docs begins on Thursday. As the name might imply, this is a documentary film festival with an amazing array of docs, many getting their world premieres. I’m a little busy with Tribeca to go through all that is being offered, but if you live in Toronto, then you should be able to find some interesting subjects covered.

REPERTORY

METROGRAPH (NYC):

Metrograph Pictures’ second release is a restored rerelease of Djibril Diop Mambety’s Hyenas (1992), a comic adaptation of Friedrich Dürrenmatt’s play “The Visit” about a rich woman who is visiting a small African village with enough money to back the man running for mayor of the town. Instead, she reveals that he got her pregnant and abandoned her with child, leading her to a life of misery before coming into money. She offers a bounty to kill the man who did this to her, and the village needs to decide whether they like the mayoral candidate, a popular shopkeeper, as much as they need the money being offered. It’s a pretty fascinating film, beautifully shot, and it’s nice to see the Metrograph reviving it through their distribution arm. On top of that, the retrospective of Brazilian filmmaker Nelson Pereira Dos Santos continues through Sunday, including a few repeat showings. Late Nites at Metrograph offers Gaspar Noe’s recent Climax, as well as Evangelion 1.0 and Evangelion 2.0for the Anime fans. Playtime: Family Matinees ends the month with a classic Kurt Russell Disney movie, The Barefoot Executive (1971).

THE NEW BEVERLY (L.A.):

Weds. afternoon is a screening of Melville’s 1956 film Bob Le Flambeur, while a double feature of Sydney Pollack’s The Yakuza (1974) and John Woo’s A Better Tomorrow II (1987) runs Weds. and Thursday. The Extended Version of Sam Peckinpah’s Major Dundee (1965), starring Charlton Heston, screens on Friday and Saturday, followed by the double feature of Peter Sellers’ 1966 film After the Fox and Elaine May’s The Hearbreak Kid on Sunday and Monday. Tarantino’s The Hateful Eight and the 1983 comedy Doctor Detroit are the Friday and Saturday midnight movies, respectably. This weekend’s KIDEE MATINEE is Lord and Miller’s animated Cloudy with a Chance of Meatballs, while Monday’s matinee is David Fincher’s Fight Club.

FILM FORUM (NYC):

The “Trilogies” series continues this weekend with Andrzej Wajda’s “War Trilogy” (A Generation, Kanal, Ashes and Diamonds) on Wednesday, Jean Cocteau’s “Orphic Trilogy” (Blood of a Poet, Orpheus and Testament of Orpheus) on Thursday. Ingmar Bergman’s “God and Man Trilogy” (Through a Glass Darkly, Winter Light and The Silence) screens on Friday, and then Nicolas Winding Refn’s Pusher trilogy begins on Friday then continues on Saturday, April 27, and the third part on May 4. (Trust me, this is not an easy series to watch in one sitting.) Also, Marcel Pagnol’s “Marseilles Trilogy” will screen on Sunday. Film Forum Jr. shows Satyajit Ray’s Pather Panchali (1955), which is also part of Ray’s “Apu Trilogy” for the “Trilogies” series. See how that works?

BAM CINEMATEK (NYC):

BAM is killing it this week with a number of releases including a restored rerelease of Nina Menkes’ 1991 film Queen of Diamond with Menkes present for a QnA on Friday night and a panel on Saturday night. Set in Vegas, it deals with a disaffected blackjack dealer who drifts through a series of encounters. On Wednesday, BAM’s “Screen Epiphanies” series continues with Vanity Faircritic K. Austin Collins presenting Brian De Palma’s thriller Femme Fatale, starring Rebecca Romjin. Lastly, on Sunday, the “Beyond the Canon” series continues with a double feature of Charles Lane’s Sidewalk Stories (1989) with Charlie Chaplin’s The Kid (1921).

EGYPTIAN THEATRE (LA):

The Egyptian gets in on Aero’s Classic Movie ClownsThursday with a Marx Brothers double feature of A Night at the Opera (1935) and A Day at the Races (1937) with authors Robert Bader and Josh Frank signing their book. Friday sees a Stanley Donen tribute with a screening of Singin’ in the Rain (1952), plus there will be an encore screening of the 7-hour War and Peace (1967) on Sunday and Disney’s Mary Poppins (1964) on Sunday with a panel in conjunction with the Art Directors Guild Film Society.

AERO (LA):

A new series called “Cowboys and Samurai” begins this week, and it’s little surprise that most of the samurai movies are from Akira Kurosawa. It begins on Thursday with a double feature of Rashomon (1950)and High Noon, then continues Friday with The Searchers (1956) and The Hidden Fortress (1958) and Seven Samurai (1954) and The Wild Bunch (1969) on Saturday. Sunday’s double feature is Clint Eastwood’s Unforgiven (1992) and the 1962 film Harakiri (1962) (not directed by Kurosawa!). Sunday is also a rescheduled screening of the musical Annie (1982), as part of the Albert Finney remembrance.

IFC CENTER (NYC)

Waverly Midnights: Parental Guidance continues with Poltergeist (1982), Weekend Classics: Love Mom and Dad screens Charlie Chaplin’s The Kid (1921), while Late Night Favorites: Spring shows Jodorowsky’s El Topo (1970).

MOMA (NYC):

Modern Matinees: B is for Bacall will show 1956’s Written on the Windon Weds, How to Marry a Millionaire (1953) Thursday and then end the series on Friday with a reshowing of Vincent Minelli’s��Designing Woman (1957).

MUSEUM OF THE MOVING IMAGE (NYC):

The museum’s See it Big! Action series continues with two screenings of William Friedkin’s The French Connection 1971) on Friday and Saturday, Bullitt (1968) on Saturday and George Miller’s Mad Max: Fury Road on Sunday. There will also be a showing of William Lustig’s 1980 horror film Maniacwith Lustig in attendance as part of its Disreputable Cinema series. This weekend is the first I’ve ever wished I lived out in Astoria, Queens.

QUAD CINEMA (NYC):

Wild Things: The Ferocious Films of Nelly Kaplan ends Thursday, but I don’t have any information for the weekend as of yet.

LANDMARK THEATRES NUART (LA):

This Friday’s midnight movie is John Carpenter’s The Thing (1982), also starring Kurt Russell.

That’s it for this week. Next week: Four new wide releases that aren’t Avengers: Endgame!

#WhatToWatchThisWeekend Movies Reviews AvengersEndgame TheWhiteCrow

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joyfulsongbird · 5 years ago

Text

Forgetting

It’s a slow process, for awhile, Eurydice thinks everything’s going to be okay. not good, not great. but she thinks it’s going to be okay. she has the memory of Orpheus’ embrace, she has the memory of his kisses, his lips on hers, and that’s all she needs. to get through every day, she just needs the memory of her fingertips brushing along his jaw and that keeps her going from morning to night. she thought that she’d have that fuel forever, she thought that she’d never lose that part of her.

it takes years, it takes many, many years but there comes a day where she doesn’t know what she remembers anymore. she wakes up and there’s something missing, and she can’t place it. there’s a gap, but she thinks it must be a dream she had had that has slipped her memory. in a way, it was. maybe just one of those half lidded, awake but not dreams where she goes the whole day trying to remember what she dreamt.

and maybe, this had been slowly happening for months before, but she didn’t notice until the largest gap was lost. she lost the bridge between down and up, between here and there.

she lost him.

when the train pulls in, she smiles. she knows this, knows the smell of the train, and the sound of the whistle. she probably knows that best. dropping her tools, she starts her way to the train station. she won’t get in trouble for this, Hades always leaves the fields the meet his wife at the train station. many of the workers take a break, talk amongst themselves. years ago, this would never happen and then one day, it changed. like a flip of a switch, she could suddenly breath down below. the sky felt just a little bit more open and the fields felt less dense. they could actually speak and look. a beautiful day it was, when she began work on the wall but was told to start taking it down. now, the wall is almost all gone and sunlight lazily drifts in. but they are still not able to cross it. they can’t.

Eurydice stands off to the side, watching Lady Persephone kiss her husband and waiting for her turn to greet the goddess. and finally, finally, finally, the woman turns to her and opens her arms. Eurydice flies into them, the goddess is strong, lifting her slightly off the ground in the tightness of the hug.

“it’s so good to see you, hon!” she says, muffled into Eurydice’s shoulder.

“you too.” Eurydice replies, her arms still tight around her. when she pulls back, Persephone holds her at an arm's length, inspecting her thoroughly.

“you’ve lost weight, have you been eating enough?” Eurydice laughs and nods. “are you sure? I’ll make sure to talk to Hades about-”

“I’m fine!” Eurydice says, her laugh bubbling through into her words. “it’s so good to see you, these last six months have been so dark. darker than usual, with you gone.”

“well, I’m here to make things bright again.” she brushes a piece of hair behind Eurydice’s ear. “let’s get you a drink.”

they begin their descent down from the train station before Persephone stops in her tracks. “wait, before I forget...”

she searches in her bag for a minute or two before pulling out an envelope with clean cursive written on the front.

“what’s this?” Eurydice asks, carefully taking it from her.

Persephone smile flickers off her face for a brief moment, like the glitching of a television, so quick, there then gone. “it’s from Orpheus.”

Eurydice turns the letter over in her hands once, observing the pale yellow of the envelope. and without even looking up, without any sort of dramatics or even an inkling of tone, she says:

“who?”

Persephone is right in her face before Eurydice can even register what’s going, her face between Persephone’s two hands. “Eurydice, baby, what did you just say?”

“um,” she leans back, unsure of what to make of the goddess’ desperate features and clinging hands. “I just- I don’t- this letter-”

“is from Orpheus, your poet, your boy, your husband.”

“I’m sorry... husband?” Eurydice tries to backtrack when she sees the devastation ripple across Persephone’s face. “no, no, I really am sorry if I upset you, I’m sorry.”

“no, no, it’s okay.” Persephone pulls the younger girl close, placing a hand on the back of her head and holding it there so that she doesn’t see the few tears slipping down her face. “don’t apologize, dear, it’s not your fault... isn’t your fault.”

she wipes away the few tears after she pulls back, ignoring Eurydice’s prying eyes. “I’ll take this.” she takes the letter from her. “and I think I promised my favorite girl a drink, didn’t I?”

“Seph-”

“c’mon,” she prompts with a wobbly smile. “I’ll make it worth your while.”

***

Persephone’s upset, Eurydice isn’t sure about what, but she can tell when the older woman is mad or upset or at an emotional edge because she’s distracting herself with drink. Eurydice, slowly drawing herself away from the woman, has her curiosity growing slowly in her chest.

what was in that letter?

she has to know. it was just sitting in the back of her mind when they first got to the bar, but after the first drink, the buzz turned into a roar. she has to know. and Orpheus, who the hell is Orpheus? that buzz is there, behind the roar of want, the curiosity and the... familiarity but not. she can’t decide if it’s actually there or it’s just her mind tricking her into thinking there are memories there. and better yet, where did Persephone get the letter? from Up Top?

all Eurydice has ever known is Hadestown.

and when Persephone is growing lazier and lazier, more and more lethargic, she carefully pulls the letter from her straw bag and slips away to sit in the hallway outside the bathroom at the bar. she sits with her legs crossed, carefully tearing open the worn envelope and pulling the letter out from inside.

dearest Eurydice,

I write this letter same letter once a year, the tenth letter that I have written since I last saw you. Persephone says she can’t take anything up from Hadestown and I know that... I wish I could see your face. I would I could hold you and it’d make me feel like I wasn’t so alone. my love, I send this letter with the intent and the hope that it reaches you and brings you some semblance of happy. Seph says you’re doing well, but she lies, sometimes, for my own good. I write this letter not for me, but so that you know that there is someone out there who will wait and love you until the sun dies out. this is not a love letter, well, I suppose it is, but it isn’t meant to tell you what you are supposed to feel, I just want you to know that I love you and I’ll continue to love you forever. It’s the last day of spring, so I know my gift will probably be ruined by the time she makes it down there but I enclosed a present for you in the envelope, press it, keep it, as a reminder of me. Eurydice, I’ll see you again one day and on that happy day, I’ll be able to tell you all this in person.

your love,

Orpheus

Eurydice fumbles for the envelope just barely after she’d finished the letter, and read the last word. her vision is blurred by... tears. she’s crying. when was the last time she did that? according to this letter, ten years. ten damn years since she felt anything and this is finally what brings her back from the dead. she still can’t remember anything but she feels the absence now, something- someone- was there and now he isn’t.

and inside the envelope, wilted and crumbling, is one single carnation, faded from red to this grayish maroon color. but it’s there, it’s petals falling and chipping, it’s there. the red, the bleak, the cold. it’s all there, but there’s missing pieces in between each glimpse of a memory and she can’t. connect. them.

damn this place.

“Eurydice-” Persephone’s voice, filled to the brim with worry, comes round the corner. “oh, love.”

she looks up, with the cold tears staining her cheeks.

“I don’t remember- I don’t remember him, I can’t remember him.” she holds out the letter for her to read. “he calls me his love, I can’t- I loved him, I did, I can feel it. But I don’t remember what he looked like or how he looked at me or what his voice sounded like or what color his eyes were or-”

“hon, calm yourself.” she kneels down in front of Eurydice, cupping her wet cheeks with both of her hands. “just breath for me, okay? just breath.”

she can barely do that. she does, though, and the world still feels shifted and off. “Seph, what can I do? he’s just... gone. he’s already fading again, his words, they’re fading.”

“take it,” Persephone takes her hands and puts the letter into them. “read it, look at it, every day and hold onto that.”

she holds the withered carnation between her thumb and forefinger, and right in front of her eyes, it blooms again. a rebirth. Eurydice’s eyes widen as Persephone takes the flower, tucking it behind one of Eurydice’s ears. she wipes away the girl’s tears with her fingers, doing more harm than good, but in those same spots places two small kisses on her cheeks.

“try to remember how he made you feel,” she murmurs. “it’s down there, and once you find that, everything else will come. he’s waiting for you, and I’m going to come back next year with another letter, but until then, you read this one until you have it memorized. you never forget, okay?”

she takes a deep breath, holding it tight and squeezing her eyes closed. he’s fading, but this time she grasps tight to the small recollection she has of him.

“okay.”

“he’s waiting for you,” Persephone says. “just hold on until then.”

he’s fading, nearly gone, but wherever he goes, she’s going to follow.

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kenzierose53 · 5 years ago

Text

Promises (xiv)

This might have been one of my favorite chapters to write.

- MaKenzie ❤️

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

PERSEPHONE

It was hard to leave Eurydice's side. Watching her toss and turn while screaming for her poet was the worst thing I have had to experience. I have grown to care for the couple dearly, Eurydice in particular. She reminds me so much of myself at a younger age. Her determination, strength, and passion make me admire the poor girl.

From what she has told me her home life was never good. She's never had a motherly figure in her life. When she told me that I instantly became protective over the child. Part of me was telling me to become that motherly figure for her. I know how hard it can be to deal with problems when you have no one to turn to. For me, alcohol became the thing that I turn to. I know it's a bad habit but until Orpheus came and knocked some sense into my husband I had nothing.

Hades. My light. My darkness. My love. Falling in love with him was easy. When we were young he would shower me in compliments, sing to me, just make me feel like the only girl in the world. His mysterious bad-boy aura also drew me to him. My mother tried to groom me to be some "perfect" goddess, I never felt like I could be myself around her. When I met Hades I finally felt seen for who I am. He made me believe that I was just perfect the way that I was.

My relationship with my mother is still shaky because of my decision to marry Hades. I love him and have never regretted my decision in marrying him. Maybe that's why I am also drawn to be a motherly figure to Eurydice? She doesn't have another woman to guide her through love and self-expression. Maybe I am trying to fill the own hole in my heart where my mother should be?

All I know is that I am going to be there for her and the poet. They are a part of my family now and I will protect them till the ends of the Earth. I have already failed them once; I can't fail them again. Eurydice has drifted off to sleep again after the trauma of her final memory. She sobbed until her body stilled, too tired to go on.

My heart aches for the poor couple. I don't think I could ever survive knowing that part of me was missing. If I knew that my husband was forever torn from me and he couldn't remember me? I would probably do the same thing Orpheus tried. I don't think I could live without Hades.

Kissing Eurydice on the forehead, I knew that it was time for me to head home. In just a week I would be leaving my love for another six months. We haven't exactly discussed how we are going to manage our time since we have gotten close again. I fear his jealousy and doubt will cause him to come to take me early again. If I didn't enjoy the sun, the freedom of the Overworld so much, I would stay glued to Hades' side in the Underworld.

"I was worried about you," his silky voice wrapped me in warmth as I walked through the doors of our home. He pushed himself out of his chair and came to wrap me in his arms. I held onto every second of this embrace as I was about to be separated from him.

Pulling back, I cupped his cheek. "I told you that I was going to be gone all night," my voice was quiet as I didn't want to break the serenity of this moment. In his embrace, I felt like most precious thing in the world. Being this close I could see the bags that were under his eyes. I genteelly ran my fingers across them causing him to shut his eyes. "Did you not sleep well dear?"

His sigh was enough of an answer for me. Softly I grabbed his hand and led him to our bedroom. He stood and watched as I flopped on the bed. I must admit, I was quite tired as well. After watching Eurydice suffer through all she did it was hard to sleep. My husband just stared at me from the end of the bed with raised brows. With a smile, I patted the bed next to me.

I could see his hesitation to lie down with me. He was King and I'm sure he had work to do but right now we need time to ourselves. His body slowly relaxed and he came to bed. I took his hand and brought it to my lips. A small smile appeared on his face at the small action. His large hand came up, brushing away a strand of hair before resting on my cheek.

We lie in comfortable silence, enjoying each other's company. The spark that has reignited between Hades and I is something I will clutch on to. "How did I get so lucky?" His voice was quiet, so quiet I almost didn't hear him.

A smile instantly bloomed on my face. "I am pretty great, aren't I?" My laugh was soft, not wanting to break the peace. This time a smile appeared on his face. He doesn't smile often but when he does it light a fire in my heart. I reached out and caressed his cheek, his head leaning into my hand. While my husband was the big bad wolf to everyone else he was my teddy bear.

The smile on his face didn't last long before it was replaced with a look of worry. Whatever was on his mind was really bothering him. Over the past few years I was used to him not turning to me for advice but when we were younger we used to be each other's confidants. I tried to sooth the lines that were forming on his furrowed brows. "What's going on in that brain of your love?"

I was praying that he would confide in me again. I felt helpless when he remained quiet. I just wanted to help my husband. Sighing he grabbed the hand that was on his face and brought it to his lips. "I have been thinking a lot dear," his voice was a bit shaky. This worried me, it was unlike Hades to be nervous about anything. "I have made a lot of mistakes recently. Mistakes I'm not proud of. Mistakes that almost caused me to lose the best thing that happened to me," he paused pulling me closer to him.

I wanted to reassure him, he looked so broken. I haven't seen him look this distraught since I left for the first time. He cut me off before I could say anything, "I don't know if it's because I have seen how happy you have been hanging out with the girl or if it's the fact that I am going to lose you again but...recently..." he looked like he was struggling to find the words to express how he felt.

It hurt watching my King crumble. He has always been a rock but now he was slower showing more humanity. I just wanted to take away all of the pain he was feeling. "Am I a good man Persephone?" The crack in his voice at the end instantly broke my heart.

The strong man I have gotten to known was broken in my arms. "Hades," I kept my voice soft. Before I continued I hugged him to my chest. I have been comforting so many people recently it's become an instant reaction from me. I cradled my husband to my chest as we lie in silence. As much as I just wanted to reassure him, I know him. He would want me to be bluntly honest with him. Honestly is something he cherishes, which makes what I am about to tell him hard.

Taking a deep breath, I sat up in the bed dragging him with me. I grabbed his hands in mine and let them rest on my lap. "We all make mistakes love," I wasn't really sure how to start but this seemed like a good way to start. "You've made mistakes but that's okay. Yes, it was a mistake what you turned Hadestown into but you're fixing it. The mistakes you've made you're working on fixing," he seemed to relax the more I spoke. "Mistakes are what make us real. If we were all perfect, then we wouldn't be genuine."

Hades gave me a small smile before melting my heart by saying, "You're perfect."

The butterflies in my stomach made me lose my train of thought. "Love, I'm far from perfect," I tried to keep my voice steady as I thought of a way to tell him the truth. "If anything I have been quite imperfect over the past few months."

He tilted his head slightly at me as if prompting me to continue. "I haven't been one hundred percent honest with you," my voice was really low but I know he still heard me. His body stiffened slightly at my confession. "For once I have been working on fixing one of your mistakes."

His eyes hardened slightly, "What have you done?" His deep voice sent shivers down my spine.

I was trying to think of a way to keep him from getting overly angry with me. "There was a reason I selected Eurydice to be my assistant," at the mention of her name he relaxed slightly. He must have thought I was talking about being unfaithful. "As you know I don't agree with what you did to the young lovers," his face dropped slightly at this.

He knows how disappointed in him I am but he's never tried to fix it. "Orpheus brought us back together and you repaid him by giving him some ridiculous task you knew he would fail. Why did you do it?"

I was expecting him to yell, be angry in the slightest but he remained neutral. "I would have done the same thing he did," he looked ashamed to be admitting this. "Not knowing if you would follow me, not being able to have any sort of confirmation...it would have driven me to turn around too. Deep down, I thought that the boy would have been strong enough to make it."

My eyes widened at this. If he knew that even he would fail, then why did he makes the fragile boy do the test? "Why did you do it Hades?" I tried to keep the bitterness out of my tone. Knowing that even the King of the Underworld would fail made me upset in the slightest. "You set them up to fail," this time the bitterness leaked into my voice.

My husband's eyes dropped, he could no longer look me in the eyes. "It was a decision I made as King. If I just let them go then the Kingdom would have fallen. I would have lost everything."

Tears spring to my eyes at this. "You had me," my voice was quiet as I tried to fight back tears. He instantly raised his head at my tone. "Was your kingdom really more important than I? Did you ever think to ask me about what to do?" His silence was infuriating, "You made me your queen and you didn't even think to consult her about a decision regarding the kingdom!" My fears of being a worthless wife, queen, came seeping in. "Am I not good enough for you, for your kingdom?"

In an instant, Hades had wrapped me up in his arms. For the first time in a long while, I had someone to comfort me. His strong arms made me feel safe, protected. "Love you are too good for me," he whispered in my ear. "I didn't ask you because I know you would have made me feel a fool. You would have made me see that you are all I need. At the time, I was angry someone had bested me and I know you would have allowed me to crumble. My anger got the best of me." Slowly I was calming back down. My breathing was evening out and I could start to think straight. "That is one of the mistakes I have been thinking about lately," this caused me to raise my head. "The boy made me realize that you are all I need. I couldn't survive being in their situation."

He feels bad about the situation? Maybe him knowing the whole truth won't be so bad? I can tell it was taking my husband a lot to admit his mistakes to me. He was tense, a scowl on his face. "Let me take some of that stress off your shoulders," his eyes brightened at this. "I have already started to fix this mistake I just need you to let me finish my plan."

He just raised his eyebrow at me, "And what do you have in mind love?"

#hadestown #hadestown fanfic #hadestown fanfiction #hadestown fic #orpheus #eurydice #orphydice #orpheus and eurydice #persephone #hades #hermes #promises #fanfic #soft hades

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