#wead tag
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desperatepleasures · 10 months ago
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guy who googles "how to smoke weed" every single time he lights up
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marcmorrigan · 9 months ago
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once again drawing my OCs half-dressed and draped over each other. as you do
OCs: maive (she/her) | seyva (they/them)
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auspex · 1 year ago
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alright besties its Woim time
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tinylilacbun · 2 years ago
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hey I’m feewing wittle so can you gib me some fics to wead (yours or not) I want papa Stevie & daddy Buggy
@babyhatesreality and @ace-of-gay has really good little fics! I hope this helps love.
Need you now is a stucky one! I'll find another, and I can tag you! Is it alright if I tag you in some?
- Makayla 💜
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remade3940580486940568 · 6 years ago
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GUYS I FOUND A PERFECT LITTLE CHUNK OF WEED ON THE CARPET. THAT MAKES NO SENSE. IT WASNT THERE BEFORE. I WAS RIGHT ABOUT TO GET A VIOLENT MELTDOWN. I AM NOW RECONSIDERING MY ATHEISM LMAO
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youre-only-gay-once · 3 years ago
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Anyone in this thread smonk wead
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ciriceart · 4 years ago
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Nothing more aggravating than trying to chill out with your guy but it feels like every ghoul and their summoner keeps barging in and nagging him about “papal obligations” and “responsibilities” and “work”.
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damaramegido · 4 years ago
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youspeakshit · 4 years ago
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I think I totally forgot to mention but I scored myself one of pete doherty's bracelets made from his guitar strings, used in last year's tour !! they look like this
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spent too much money on it tbh but I'm doing ok $$$ bc of quarentine and also after this fucking awful year i deserved a lil splurge....
mine is currently with a friend in europe bc it was a safer delivery option rn, couldn't trust it being sent to brazil. can't wait to wear it!
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fiwe-spiwit-cookey · 6 years ago
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“Hewwo evewybody!”
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“Webwog this post. I dawe you to.”
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desperatepleasures · 9 months ago
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I'm so sorry to have to tell you this but I've come to the realization that it would be beneficial to me to become a Weed Vape Guy
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nixe-jpg · 6 years ago
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dont have any normal art to post so please. take this beautiful creation of my hands
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invisibleoctopus · 4 years ago
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hm dont like this emotional snowballing
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remade3940580486940568 · 6 years ago
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And so the stoners made their pilgrimage to Belfast City, to make merry in the Gardens, to toke before the peelers, powerless to stop the wall of smoke born from three hundred men, women, nb punks, and chavs joining together to just get really stoned and not be kneecapping or exploding eachother for once
@bone-sugar
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intynidad · 4 years ago
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Hi hi!! Could I request the dorm leaders (if that’s too many, your favorites!) with a child MC? (Parental or older sibling sorta relationship) (also by child I mean 8-10 years old) Have a wonderful day, drink some water and eat protein! 💕
@moomoo-mochi OMG THANK YOU??
I love this so much I’m just a sucker for this kind of prompt!!
Also, this will be based on how I acted as a toddler (spoiler I was a stupid kid)
a health potion with risu giggles for a fellow merchant!
(also sorry I didn't know what to write for iidia or vil and I didn't want to write something that I wasn't satisfied 
The beginning 
-you careless puppy, How many times I told the two of you to be careful!- professor crewel was scolding you and your lab partner...well at your lab partner more than you, you were kinda busy trying to get out of the cauldron to listen 
You and your lab partner were assigned to do a regression potion that was supposed to work in reviving dead plants or turning rotten food into edible again but when you were measuring the exact amount of the last ingredient to finish the potion, somebody accidentally pushed you making you spill all of the ingredients...and yourself into the cauldron.
so now there you are extremely confused about what just happened and incapable of taking care of yourself for the 3 days the potion was supposed to last and now your lab partner has to take care of you until the potion wore off or mister crewel finds an antidote
Riddle Rosehearts
Riddle has an abusive mother and no younger siblings so our dear tomato is lost, he doesn’t know any rules that would help him take care of a little child so he asks trey for help (like most of heartsalybul when they have problems).
trey lets you eat pastries while riddle does his dorm leader duties but he looked away for a second and oops no child in sight...ok time to panic.
riddle was scolding some heartsalybul students that spilled all of the red paint in one of the chairs so now not only the other members of the dorm couldn’t continue painting but now the unbirthday party had to cancel and you know what happens when you break one of the queen’s rules
-OFF WITH YOUR- Riddle swung his magic pen
-wead!- riddle turn around to see you with a rose in your hand pretending it to be a magic pen
-off widd your wead!- you repeated swinging the rose up and down
riddle was stroked by your cuteness like a truck; he was speechless (also because picking roses was against the rules but lest ignore it) the two students he was scolding ran away because their dorm leader was picking you up and giggling at your little imitation of him 
-nono Off, with, your, head!-
-off wid your wead!-
Leona kingschoolar
-agh how annoying- the savanaclaw dorm leader wasn’t a big fan of children and much less taking care of them, he probably was gonna throw you at Ruggie or jack, both of them had younger siblings so they could probably take care of you better but there is one thing he didn’t count off
-LEONA OJI-TAN-...fuck, today was the day Cheka came to visit his dear oji-tan, now Leona is not only stuck with a brat but with a furball too.
-who are them uncle?-(owo who this) Cheka waved at the child that was behind his uncle’s legs-hi I am Cheka, wanna play tag?!-oh ho ho this gives him an idea
-Cheka this is Y/N, your new playmate-the lion cub had a little sparkle in his eyes
-you two can play all day and ill be watching you from that tree so have fun-hell yea he was a genius Cheka and you are entertained, and he can nap is a win-win situation for everyone
-WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHH- and there it goes his perfect plan
-oi, what happened- you were in  sitting on the ground while hugging your knee and crying your heart out and Cheka kneeled beside you trying to comfort you 
-I’m-I’m so sorry I didn’t mean to push you it was an accident- now he looked like he wanted to cry 
-agh you two cut it out-Leona said in a low growl while kneeling beside you-is just a scratch don’t worry just let me-he picked you up.
now all of you were in his room he gently  bandages your knee while Cheka was holding your hand for “moral support”
-kiss to make it better Leona oji-tan!-
-only if both of you promise to be more careful-Cheka nodded- ok “pain, pain go away *woshh*, there you go- you moved your knee and started to giggle while Cheka was already dragging you to continue playing, the two of you were lucky that both were cute because not everybody can see this side of Leona and live for telling it 
Azul Ashengrotto
-Come, come everyone!-the leader of octaville tapped his fedora-For the price of 25 madol you can have for a limited time only a  photo of our dear Y/N as a toddler!-
and of course, our dear capitalist Ursula is taking profit from this situation.
you were sitting in a little chair all dolled up while jade took pictures of you with different students and Floyd was taking the money from dose poor unfortunate souls
An hour passed and there were still about 50+ students in line for a photo when Azul notice something about you.
your hands were in the form of a tiny fist and your eyes were watery and you haven’t smiled at the camera for the last photos even when Floyd made funny faces behind jade you weren’t enjoying this.
usually, he wouldn’t care about it, he was making some good money and that was the important thing but you were different, you were his friend
-the lounge is closed, everyone get out, Floyd take care of that and jade-he looked for a second at you-make something warm for our little guest-
all of the students in line emitted different protest sounds but a look at Floyd grin and everyone was already on the exit
-sorry for all that little one- he lightly patted your hair-what about I pay you for your work with some treats?-
-*happy gasp* YESH!!-you hugged his leg with a strong grip-
-nee~ nee~, why Azul can have a hug from shrimpy and I cant?-
-FWOYD!! :D-
Kalim al asim
-Kalim, please calm down-Jamil said looking like he is gonna pop up a blood vessel
-LITTLE Y/N LITTLE Y/N LITTLE Y/N LITTLE Y/N LITTLE Y/N LITTLE Y/N LITTLE Y/N LITTLE Y/N LITTLE Y/N LITTLE Y/N LITTLE Y/N LITTLE Y/N LITTLE Y/N LITTLE Y/N LITTLE Y/N LITTLE Y/N LITTLE Y/N LITTLE Y/N LITTLE Y/N LITTLE Y/N LITTLE Y/N LITTLE Y/N LITTLE Y/N LITTLE Y/N LITTLE Y/N LITTLE Y/N LITTLE Y/N LITTLE Y/N LITTLE Y/N LITTLE Y/N LITTLE Y/N LITTLE Y/N LITTLE Y/N LITTLE Y/N LITTLE Y/N LITTLE Y/N LITTLE Y/N LITTLE Y-he was let’s say...excited about this situation
-JAMILLOOKATTHEMTHEYARESOCUTEANDTINYIWANNATROWAPARTYFORJUSTTHEMOMGTHEYARESOCUTE- 
-Remember to breathe Kalim and please calm down you are scaring them-Jamil said while kneeling to be on your level
-*gasp* I’m sorry y/n, I’m just so happy to be with you, are you hungry?-you give a quick nod
for the surprise of Jamil, the fact that you turned into a child made Kalim more independent???
he knew that crewel sensei asked Kalim to take care of you but he kinda assumed he is the one who will end up taking care of both of you.
-emmm Jamil-and here we go-have you seen Y/N around?-
-excuse me whAT??!!- Jamil shouted- HOW DO YOU LOSE A CHILD?-
-I didn’t lose them I just….temporally misplace them...OK YES, I LOST THEM BUT IS NOT MY FAULT WE WERE PLAYING HIDE N SEEK!-
-sure sure Kalim never anything is your fault-Jamil said between teeth-
Kalim could be a literal ray of sunshine but one of his bigs flaws were his “rich person behavior”
because he was spoiled and lived in a bubble he didn’t understand that his actions had consequences, in the good side he was working on it.
two hours had passed since that moment are you were nowhere to be found
now the scarabia duo was starting to panic
-OMG HOW IM SO CARELESS THAT I LOST THEM WHAT IF SOMETHING HAPPENED TO THEM IM THE WORST FRIEND IN THE WORLD-
-KALIM CALM DOWN, PANIC WILL NOT HELP IN THIS SITUATION-
-WHY ARE YOU YELLING AT ME-
-BECAUSE YOU ARE YELLING-
-*snore*-
-..............................-
-Jamil,...did that pillow made a sound?-
-I think so ?-
*SNOOOREEE*
and there you were sleeping under a big mountain of pillows you fell asleep while playing so that, why you didn’t, respond to the calls of the two boys
-ok Kalim we found them and I hope this had taught you a lesson about taking care of things...well taking care of people-
-oh for the great seven I thought I was gonna have a heart attack-
-now you know how I feel and I really would appreciate it if you used this experience to-
-*SNOOOOREEE*-
And now Kalim was sleeping beside you
great seven give Jamil patience and have mercy on both of you when morning comes 
Malleus draconia
-arent you a little thing fufufufuf-
-old man be careful with them-silver said
you might be wondering, I thought malleus would take care of toddler Y/N?
Well, that was the plan...malleus is a reserved man, with no friends more than his two guards and the older fae that raised him, that was until he meets you, you looked at him in the eyes with no fear just a hint of curiosity.
you gave him his first nickname,”tsunotaro” a childish name that was almost disrespectful to the heir of the valley of thorns and one of the most powerful wizards of all twisted wonderland, yet you called him that silly name, you hugged him, you listen to him and he listened to you, you were his friend and precisely because that he left you at the care of Lilia, the mere thought of you screaming and running away from him made his heart ache
that always happened…
Malleus is used to that, since he was a child people looked at him with fear or caution but never with kindness except for one person, you
and he was determined to let that like that, but he couldn’t stop thinking what if something happens to you?
what type of friend he would be if he lets somebody take advantage of you in this vulnerable state?
a peek wouldn’t hurt
there you were, in the flower bed of ramshackle dorm both planted, taking dandelions from around and with inexperience and tiny hands crafting a flower crown too small for anyone except you.
he looked at you from the shadows carefully to not being spotted warding you like the dragon he is.
-hewo-small and tired eyes fixed behind a large tree
malleus was behind that tree…
-whats yowr name?-now standing up and slowly walking to the tree in question-are you shy?, is oke I won’t hurt yow-
like if a child could do any damage to him
-I made thwis fow you-you said reveling a second flower crown that was just a little bit bigger than the one in your head 
you let the flower crown on the floor near the tree and waited, malleus knowing how stubborn you were he knew you wouldn’t leave so he left his hiding spot thinking about the screams and the fear your little face will have
-waaaa, you big! (giggles)-again, no signs of fear-uppa uppa!-you said while rising your hands to the sky and opening and closing your little fists
malleus emitted a low chuckle and picked you up, when you got to his eye level immediately went for his horns  touching and grabbing all your little hands could
-you sure are a strange thing, little child of man-
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fanfics4all · 4 years ago
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Sneak Around
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Request: Yes / No  do you write for narcissa malfoy? if so can you a smut with fem reader pls ? 🥰🥰 @generalwinnerbearalien
Requests are closed <3 Have a nice day/night
Narcissa Malfoy x Fem!Reader 
Word count: 1386
Warnings: Smut!
Y/N: Your Name 
PLEASE DO NOT STEAL MY WORK, I WORK HARD ON MY FICS AND IT’S NOT COOL TO STEAL SOMEONE ELSE’S WORK! 
If you want to be on the tag list for anything (My series fics, specific character fics, or just all of them) All you have to do is send me an ask and I will add you! 
Masterlist 
(Not my photo, credit to whoever made it!)
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I probably had the most unwizardly job ever, I was a real estate agent. I wasn’t a huge fan of it, but it paid the bills. I was currently trying to sell a very nice looking manor, but no takers yet. I sighed heavily, there was just one more couple I was meeting with after lunch. I honestly almost called them and told them not to come, but I powered through. I greeted them at the door and instantly knew that they were the ones. I let out a sigh of relief. The wife Narcissa had long dark hair with a blonde streak and the husband Lucius had very long platinum blonde hair. I could tell Lucius was good to her and took care of her. To my luck they took the house on the spot. 
The next week I was at the bar. I was sitting with my second drink when someone sat down next to me. I looked over and to my shock it was Narcissa. I smiled at her and she ordered herself a drink. 
“Narcissa, how are you?” I asked and she smiled. 
“Very well dear, how are you?” She asked. 
“Good, how are you and your husband settling in?” I asked. 
“Oh good, the house is lovely.” She said, taking a sip of her drink. 
A few drinks later and some pleasant conversations later, we were a little tipsy at this point as well. Narcissa gently touched my arm, tracing a path with her fingernails. She started at my wrist and moved her nails slowly up my arm. My senses stirred and by the look in her eyes I knew she wanted something from me that I wasn't supposed to give. 
“You have a husband, Narcissa.” I said. 
“Isn’t this what you wanted?” She asked, moving her arm up to touch my shoulder. I felt chills settle over my entire body, her touch was awakening something carnal within me. I made a sound quite like any other sound I’ve made before. I placed the money on the bar and grabbed her hand. We silently apparate to my place and as soon as we got to my living room I pulled her by the hips to me. She placed her arms around my neck and smiled. We shared a long, lingering look of desire before I leaned in to finally kiss her. Her mouth tasted like sweet heaven and I let my tongue explore hers while I tried my best not to think about how her husband might react. 
“Come on, let’s go to my bedroom.” I said, pulling her to the room. I shut the door behind us and my hands once again found her body, gently caressing every inch of her skin that wasn’t covered by her very nice dress. I paused as I inched my hand up under her dress and up her thigh. I looked into her eyes and saw that she wanted me to touch her pussy. She wanted me to do all the dirtiest things I could think of and she was ready for it all to happen. Our kiss made me wead, so weak I was having trouble standing. I gripped the end of her dress and pulled it over her arms. She wasn’t wearing a sitch of clothing underneath. I gasped as I looked at her naked body for the first time. Narcissa had full hips and a rounded abdomen that curved up toward her waist. Her tits were a nice size with nice hard nipples. Instantly, my hands moved to her breasts and my mouth followed. I took one nipple into my mouth and sucked until Narcissa was jumping with pleasure. I moved her to my bed, where I laid her out, naked and waiting for me as I undressed. I parted her legs and saw her pussy on display for the first time. 
“Y/N, please, lick me!” She begged and I was shocked. She did not seem like the type of woman to beg for anything. I looked up and saw her eyes were filled with excitement and I noted the chills all over her legs as I gently stroked her pussy with my fingers. She had a beautiful pussy and I took a moment to admire it. It had been a long time since I’d been with a woman and I wanted to savor every second with Narcissa. I played with her pussy, teasing her a bit so she was good and wet by the time I put my fingers inside her. She moaned as I felt around inside her, trying my best to find the sweet spot that would make her lose control. She let out a whimper as I pushed against the inside of her pussy with my fingers. I moved faster, moving my body over her to get more leverage. She bucked against me, screaming as the intensity of her pleasure increased. She was trying to wriggle away from me but I held her down, making sure she took every thrust of my fingers until her pussy finally popped. 
“Oh Merlin!” She screamed. I could feel her pussy give way and I quickly pulled my fingers from her and smiled as she squirted all over my bedspread. I didn’t care if she ruined them or anything else. Sex with Narcissa was far mroe important to me than any material possession. I instantly buried my face in her pussy, licking and sucking all her orasm juice like a thirsty fool. I couldn’t get enough of her taste, sticking my tongue deep into her hole and then pulling it back out and up towards her clit. 
“Fuck! You’re so bloody good!” She moaned as she gripped my head in her hands and held me where she wanted me to lick. This is more what I was expecting her to be like. She began grinding her pussy on my mouth, working her clit against my tongue until she was merely using my face to get herself off. I looked up at her with luck in my eyes. This woman was fucking me back and it was hot the way she was owning me. 
“You taste so good!” I moaned, drunk on the taste of her pussy. 
“I want to taste you now.” Narcissa pushed me off her and we traded spots. She parted my lips with both hands, one on each side of my pussy. She pulled down and and then up on both my lips, revealing my clit. She looked up at me with an evil, sideways smile that I soon realized was her signature look. She kept her eyes open and on me as she descended until her tongue was at clit level. She made a big production of lapping at my clit with long, slow stokes. 
“You’ve done this before!” I cried as I felt my orgasm building. My legs began to shake as she slowly moved her tongue all over me. It was amazing the things that she was doing with her tongue and I thought that was absolutely impressive until she added two fingers inside of me and worked me over completely with them. The orgasms I had were of an intensity I had never experienced. I was in shock that this woman was able to make me cum this often and this hard. No female has ever licked my pussy like that and maybe that’s why I fell in love with Narcissa right then and there. 
“I’m not done with you yet.” She said and pulled me back toward her by my legs and I watched her nipples bounce as she violently fingered my pussy. Her tongue was resting innocently on my pussy, not doing much until she could feel my legs start to shake from her fingers. Then she would add her tongue and my whole body would sing with pleasure as I shook beneath her. She was a powerful lover and by the time she was done with me, I was unable to move a single muscle. I laid there as she got up and put her dress on. 
“I have to get back before Lucius is home.” She said and kissed me one last time before apparating home. I laid there and wondered, would I ever see her like this again?
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