#we've got ourselves an epic tale folks

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John Marston's Wild West Comedy Tour

Our main gig: Chapter 1: The PLAN

And our side hustle: Shootin' Down the Fourth Wall

THE TRUE STORY:

It starts off with a conversation around the campfire after a botched robbery. John's telling the tale to pass the time, and I hit him with:

"Hey, you've got material there!" He blinks a few times, because he never thought about it that way. But he has a think about it...

"Damn, you're right!" So we leave the gang, shit's going south, anyway, but John can't swim, which doesn't leave us with much room.

The road's long, the law's tight - we're looking for something better. No more robbing trains - we're robbing people of their SERIOUS faces and selling them some good old laughter. THE COMEDY TOUR BEGINS! The name of our act: The Good, the Bad, and the Goddamn Outrageous

First stop? We head out West, hitting up the towns that have never seen a comedy show in their life. We don't just show up with jokes, we rob 'em blind (of their funny bones).

We start performing anywhere where there's a crowd - saloons, campsites - folks out here want a good laugh as much as they want a good shootout. But the road to Vegas ain't easy. We get ourselves into some WILD shit along the way.

We run into Arthur Morgan who's decided to strike it out on his own too. He begrudgingly joins us as the third wheel. We keep him JUST grumpy enough to get him to pull out his best one-liners.

FINALLY - VEGAS! Yeah, baby!

By now, we've made it big. The competition is stiff, the eyes of the world are on us. We're used to people wanting to take us down, but by now, we're feeling pretty untouchable. On the night of our big performance, we're having a blast, the audience is laughing so much they could bust a steam engine.

BUT good old Edgar Ross comes along and derails all the fun - trust that man to rain on John's rodeo. He wouldn't know a good joke if it shot him in the face. Problem is, as much as we've been making a name for ourselves as comedians, we've also drawn the attention of the law. HOW ARE WE GONNA GET OURSELVES OUTTA THIS ONE, JOHNNY BOY? John Marston and Arthur Morgan team up to give Ross the public ROASTING OF A LIFETIME. You gonna pull a slick one about John's mama being a prostitute? Be prepared to become ROAST PORK, my villanous bro. Comedic vengeance, retribution of the sweetest kind, is within our grasp. The crowd's going to remember the day they witnessed this epic lampooning from the two greatest outlaw-turned-comedians this side of the Mississippi!

Ross won't be able to hold a candle to Arthur and John, and when it's all said and done? They walk off the stage like the kings of comedy they were meant to be.

Ross will forever rue the day he thought he could punch down on poor John about his mama. The three of us? We'll be Legends of the West. Not for our robberies, not for our wanted posters - but for bringing down the goddamn house with every line.

[stitch1830]

(From bi-jinora) I have so many Azula headcanons that I have decided to share with you because. . . I felt like it! So: in my main AU she winds up with a woman named Tashi. Tashi is an airbender from the Si Wong Desert. They have 2 kids, a boy named Lu Ten and a girl named Ta Min. Lu's a non-bender, Min's a very impressive firebender, and both are rather skilled tactitions. (Tbc b/c of the letter limit)

Continued from other asks:

More Azula! I'm a big believer in the plausibility of an Azula redemption arc, so it definitely factors into my headcanons. She got A LOT of therapy, etc, and in my timeline she becomes an honorary Gaang member when she's 20. I also think that there are members of the Si Wong tribes who are descendants of airbenders who escaped Sozin's attack, hence Tashi being an airbender

Azashi (Azula/Tashi) met because Zuko tried to convince Azula to take a vacation. She was around 32, Tashi around 33. Azula was adamant that her trip have some political value, so she decides to go to the Si Wong w/ Takeo (an OC, the biological father of Lu Ten and Ta Min). They were running out of water when Tashi found them and brought them to her village-thing. The other sandbenders freaked out b/c AZULA, but Tashi trusts her. Kinda like Katara with Aang in the begining of the sho

Azula and Takeo wind up stayong at the sandbender commune for a few weeks (they warm up to Azula) and then Tashi decides to join them when they go back to the FN because she wants to see the world. Long story kind of short, Azashi fall in love and get married. Sorry for dumping all these headcanons on you, stitch :)

Hi buddy jin! No worries, I love headcanons!

This sounds like a great story in the making. Idt I've ever heard of any Si Wong tribe headcanons or takes on the Air Nomads surviving in that way, but I can see that! In general, weren't the AN pretty well-travelled? I'm sure a couple that came and went to the temples found pockets of the world that they fell in love with and stayed there. Would love to hear more about this take if you have any!

And I agree Azula is capable of having a happy life if she chooses to go down the path of getting help, which, I think she would. Especially if she has Zuko by her side. I wonder if Azula would be hesitant to accept Tashi's trust right away (her dearest friends betrayed her as a teen), and maybe there's a bit of initial bickering of "Just trust me!"// "Like Agni I will!" Maybe then while Takeo and Azula are staying at the commune, Takeo casually brings up endearing qualities of Tashi... Maybe things that Azula admires too!

That's a very cool headcanon, g! Very cool OCs too, would love to learn more :) Thank you for sharing, and feel free to send more, if you'd like. Always nice to hear from ya, and have a great day!