#we weren’t even looking for a nice one at that point just a cheap white bob cut wig

[moderately-good-at-life]

Just thinking about how my local thrift shop manifests items shortly after I speak to friends/family about said item. Like, my brother, sibling and sister on three separate occasions independent of the others all commented on the oddness of the store always having exactly what is desired….. I can’t describe the oddness of the situation

Edit: sorry for putting everything in the tags

[doderyscoffee]

pairing: jung sungchan x fem!reader (oc) genre&au(s): fluff(?), humor, enemies to lovers, high school!au warnings: language, name calling, light bullying between friends, mentions of sex, characters are implied to be seniors length: 0.7k

[7:56 am]— Joohyun slammed her locker door shut. “Is this another one of those prom-posal things where the guy desperately gets on one knee and begs me to let him take me out? Is that what this is?”

Mark Lee nodded eagerly, his eyes sparkling with hope and his pearly whites on clear display. He was bent down on one knee, holding a grand poster with the words “Don’t be naughty, let me take you to prom!” in bright red—and black for “naughty”—in his hands. The sight was hilariously pathetic.

“Get up,” Joohyun said, shifting her books so they were closer to her chest. “The answer is no, but thanks for the laugh.” She turned to me. “Let’s go. And before you say anything, it’s eight in the morning.”

“I wasn’t going to say anything,” I said as we disappeared down the hall. “Well, I was going to say one thing: Isn’t he younger than us?”

“By a year, but that doesn’t stop them.”

“Stop who?” asked Seulgi, who had emerged from a nearby classroom.

“Boys,” I said. “What were you in there for?”

Seulgi’s cheeks turned red and she smiled. “I was just asking for some more one-on-one time.”

“Ew.” Joohyun pretended to gag. “The guy’s ancient.”

“His student teacher is not.” Seulgi pushed a section of hair off her shoulder. “Who asked you out this morning?”

“Mark Lee.”

“The junior?”

“There isn’t another Mark Lee.”

Seulgi turned to me. “Has anyone asked you yet?”

I snorted. “No, and I don’t want them to.” We turned another corner. “I’m fine going with you two.”

“Well…” Seulgi straightened her posture. “I might have a date.”

Joohyun stopped in her tracks. “Get out. Who?”

“I don’t kiss and tell.”

“Oh, you whore!”

Seulgi rolled her eyes. “I don’t have to tell you everything, mom.”

“Just don’t get pregnant,” I said. “Has anyone seen Seungwan? She owes me money.”

“For what?” asked Seulgi.

“Snacks.”

“That’s unfair.”

“Not when it’s fifteen dollars worth.”

“You’re just cheap.”

“I’m broke.”

Joohyun turned to look into the mob of students. “Three o’clock.”

Seulgi and I followed Joohyun’s eyes, landing on no one other than rival!Jung Sungchan.

“Can we go?” I asked, shifting my weight from one foot to the other.

“Why?” Seulgi bit her lip. Was she seriously trying to look hot right now? “He’s cute.”

“Yeah, but I fucked him last week!” I hissed, grabbing her arm. “Let’s go!”

“What’s the big deal?”

“The big deal is that she’s not interested and it looks like he is,” said Joohyun.

“Yes, thanks for the rundown, Captain Obvious. Do you want to point out what shoes I’m wearing next?” I stepped closer to my friends, hoping that Sungchan would just walk by on his merry way, but nothing seemed to go my way anymore.

“Y/N?” Sungchan said as he got closer, and Seulgi took a step back, revealing my half-curled form to the only guy I didn’t want to see. “Are you hiding?”

“No, I’m coughing,” I said, standing back to my full height.

“Are you sick?” He reached a hand out and pressed it against my forehead.

“Sick of you.”

“You don’t have a temperature.”

“Did your hand-thermometer tell you that?”

“Why weren’t you at yesterday’s party?”

“What is this? An interrogation?”

“Just wondering why you didn’t make it to your own team’s celebration party.”

“I was busy.”

“Doing what?”

I sighed. “What do you want, Sungchan?”

“Another blowjob would be nice.”

“Get over yourself.”

“Prom.”

“What about prom?”

“Are you going with anyone?”

“No.”

“You are now.”

“You can’t just make decisions for me.”

“I just did.” He smiled as if he were proud of himself. “We’re wearing blue.”

“I don’t even like blue!”

“We can negotiate green.”

“I’m not going with you!”

Before I could say another word, the bell rang, signaling the start of class. I resisted the urge to punch the nearest locker or, better yet, Sungchan himself.

“I’ll pick you up tomorrow at six!” Sungchan said, walking backwards. “You can pick out your dress!”

“I guess you’re going with someone now.” Seulgi nudged me playfully as we walked the rest of the way to class. “Oh, calm down! The post-prom sex will be good.”

“You’re the worst, Seulgi,” I said.

[frostyreturns]

Frosty Ruins Where Is Anne Frank

I have to admit going into this one I have my biases against it. First of all it was made in 2022 and nothing produced in the last 5-6 years has been good. Also because it's about nazis and jewish people I can't imagine it's going to be a faithful or accurate movie in the slightest because nobody in hollywood understands even the first thing about what a nazi is. Other than that I'm going into this movie totally blind, never heard of it before, never saw a trailer and am not even aware of the premise beyond the title.

The movie opens with text on a black screen and starts with a typo saying "the diary is one of the famous books ever written" I think you might be missing a word or two there pal. This is the opening sequence...you didn't bother to proof read the first ten seconds of your movie? It's two sentences and you fucked it up.

I don't know who made this but the art style is like if studio ghibli was tumblrized. It's like a weird combo of cheap netflix cartoon character designs but done in the style of an expensive japanese anime. It looks weird and I don't like it but it's not as cancerous to look at, the art itself is not off putting enough to discard it based on look alone.

What is off putting is the premise, the imaginary girl that Anne Frank is writing to comes to life and goes looking for Anne. The words of the diary magically swirl into life...there's just something that feels off ethically with this one. Like that it's exploitive in some way but I can't quite put my finger on it yet.

Our first look at the nazis is as I feared...absurd. The nazis march down the street in all black cloaks like they're the fucking nazgul, and they don't look human, their eyes are totally black and their faces are ghostly  white and expressionless. It's actually a perfect representation of what demonizing something is. Now I'm not saying they weren't bad guys...but they were human. That should be the primary lesson people take away from nazi Germany...the horrors and retarded nonsense that thinking people were convinced to do. That's the horror of the story of the holocaust, that people who were once friends and neighbours are now hunting each other like animals, stripping them of their basic rights and dignity and doing so in the full belief that they were doing the right thing. When you turn a nazi into this snarling inhuman demon you unlearn that lesson.

Now I've never read Anne Franks diary but I am aware of the backstory and that there are multiple versions. There are multiple versions because when they realized they would be submitting the diary for publication there were a number of things Anne had written that the father edited it out because it made them look bad. The movie claims that never happened but they say a lot of stuff that's lies. Remember this is a child stuck in a room with people in a terrible situation so not everything she wrote would have been very nice, I understand there was some nasty things said about some of the people they were hiding with or something like that. And maybe that's what bothers me about the movie, it's not reality...it's taking a traumatic experience a child had...cleaning it up to fit a narrative and packaging it for entertainment purposes.

There's also a point in her description of the persecution of the jews that annoyed me, she claims the reason they were targetted was because societies always find a minority group to blame. But that's not what happened and again this is another major history lesson we should all have taken from nazi germany that everybody has forgotten. It wasn't because they were a minority, nobody just says I'm going to hate this minority group for no reason Germany was a society built on minority groups, there were many different minority groups. The reason they chose the jews and the reason many societies have always chosen the jews...and the reason they so effectively villified the jews was because they were seen as a privileged class of people. Because so many of the societies doctors, lawyers, bankers, were jewish. Jews are an insular community that looks out for each, because of their strong sense of family nationality and faith coupled with a desire to do well and to train their kids to do well, they tend to be overrepresented in many powerful and profitable industries. This was why they were targetted, this is why they were scapegoated...it's the same rhetoric that goes into any generic 1%er or eat the rich diatribe. It was the socialist part of national socialism, only the capitalists hoarding all the wealth were jews rather than just "the rich"

The reason this rationale is forgotten about, glossed over and rebranded is because it describes the behaviour and worldview of modern progressive politics perfectly. They ignore that part of it because they themselves are guilty of it. Hitlers speeches and writings about the jews were rewritten to be about white people or about men and have been published in progressive university journals. So they have to pretend it's just because they were minorities because to understand the reality would mean cognitive dissonance.

All that aside the movie also has this boring artsy movie vibe to it I'm not interested in. I don't need to sit here and watch a little girl play cats cradle in a police station while a soft mandolin plays in the background, or listen to melancholic indie vocals over images of an imaginary girl ice skating before dissolving into inky wisps.

There's also a fairly blasphemous part I don't think a lot of jews or any religious people would appreciate where they both imply that God's existence is ridiculous while also implying that Anne Frank is like God because she's everywhere...because a lot of things are named after her. There's a lot of moments like that which scream "non practicing jew." They really go out of their way to literally deify her and at one point call her diary a sacred object.

The whole premise of the movie is bizarre and it only gets more bizarre. The idea is you see flashbacks to Anne Franks life and they are mixed in with parts of the movie that take place in the modern world...where this imaginary friend is looking for her long gone friend. The movie is incomprehensible because parts of it play like a fever dream and the rest of it is people behaving strangely and saying things that are so out of left field and are not believable.

The most disgusting part of the movie is the ending, where they use the emotional manipulation of the holocaust stories and try to tie it to other political agendas that have nothing to do with the holocaust. At the end she threatens to burn Annes diary if the country doesn't let in all the refugees and let them all stay for as long as they want. The movie is just one long attempt to use jewish people as props to advance a political agenda and the whole movie reeks of it. I hated this movie a lot but I feel like I'd have a much more visceral hatred of it if I was jewish.

The movie ends with this white text that makes the completely baseless assertion that antisemitism, violent racism and persecution of minorities is on the rise.

boring, ugly, tragedy porn, incomprehensible propaganda.

f-

[ibelieveinahappilyeverafter]

Bound by Choice - Chapter 1

A/N: I need you all to trust me. Yes, I am aware this is utterly self-indulgent and that I have four other books planned out after this one, one of the future books being already outlined and ready to write. I know this is not what I usually write, but, again, I need you all to trust me.

Plus, this was really, really fun to write and I started it when I was in my Peak Pokemon Submas Obsession about a year or two ago now, so it's some of my favorite writing in a while.

Fandom: Pokemon (Black & White, All Media Types, Legends: Arceus)

Characters: Original Character, Kudari | Emmet, Nobori | Ingo

Rating: Teen Audiences

Summary: Andy has always been afraid of pokemon and what it is that they’re able to do, which makes their life rather hard considering they’re twenty-two, live in Unova, and work in Nimbasa City; which is known as the battle capital of their region. Their closest friend and semi-adopted mother being a former gym battle leader also didn’t tend to help matters.

A panic attack on a subway car they thought was empty, however, leads to them meeting the infamous Subway Bosses and learning that pokemon, while terrifying, weren’t the monsters they had grown up believing them to be. Getting sucked up into the lives of the two Subway Bosses and their best friend Gym Leader Elesa might be even more terrifying than the pokemon, however.

AO3 Link: Bound by Choice, Chapter 1

Chapters 2-5 Immediately Available on Patreon

---

If you enjoy this story then check out my Writing Commissions.

…or, if you prefer, you can just buy me a ko-fi! ☕ …or, if you have a nice allowance, support me on Patreon! 🪶

---

Chapter 1 - Andy

It wasn’t the lack of noise to show the office was empty that had alerted him, or the way his head jerked up from a half-asleep state for the third time, or even how all light in the office had switched from sunny filled glass windows to cheap, flickering overhead lights. No, what alerted Andy to the fact that he had stayed far too late for the third time that week was the slap to his back with the annoyingly bright and cheerful accompaniment of, “Andy! Do they got you pulling doubles again? And on a Friday no less!”

“No, Anthony,” Andy said, forcing himself to not push the words through gritted teeth as his back stung from the ‘friendly’ slap. Anthony wasn’t even a bad person! He was just vaguely dick-ish like every other office coworker who didn’t want to be there. “I’m not pulling doubles. Just finishing up some sheets.” 

“Man,” Anthony sighed, Andy closing his eyes and just barely resisting the urge to groan. That was Anthony’s ‘nostalgic’ sigh. “I wish I had the energy you kids have today.” 

I’m twenty-two, first of all, Andy resisted the urge to scream. And second of all, you’re only seven years older than me! Why in Arceus’ name-?! Andy pushed the thoughts away, focusing on the fact that he was definitely treating himself to something sugary and unhealthy for how much resisting he was doing when it came to maiming his coworkers. 

As it was, Andy simply began disconnecting from his station, nodding and humming in all the right places as Anthony began yet another one of his monologues. If nothing else, Andy could at least be satisfied with the fact that he had finished inputting all the data into the National Dex that his team was supposed to have finished that week. A quick look at his xtrans showed that mercy did indeed exist in the world. If he booked it, he’d make it just in time to grab one of the last trains of the night back home. 

Standing up, and taking a minute to let the wave of dizziness roll through him that came from sitting in a chair for six more hours than he had wanted to, Andy looked to Anthony. The man was still talking. “-really, at this point you might as well just transfer to the night shift with how often you’re here- Hey! We could be desk buddies!” Ah. Anthony was attempting to lead him into the realm of eternal torment. Not today. 

“Something to definitely talk to Lindy about!” Andy fake chirped, pitching his voice into something as cheerful as he could manage when it was almost ten at night and he had clocked in at nine that morning. “For now, though, I should probably get going before they nag at me about overtime. You know how they are.”

Andy faked a laugh, nodded along to Anthony’s own joke that was basically a rip off of his own, and slowly backed away with his bag. The second Anthony turned to bring someone else into the conversation, Andy booked it. 

There was a time Andy would have felt bad about that, but as it was, he could only feel tired relief as he made it past a gauntlet of elevators and into the locker rooms. It was his only safe haven as the night shift workers had already clocked in and all the day workers were long gone. Like he should have been. 

“‘Oh, Andy, I have my bachelorette party tonight! You just have to cover for me!’” Andy mocked under his breath, tugging and pulling his lab coat off of him — Why did they even use lab coats? They worked in data entry! — before tossing it into his too-small locker. “Pretty bold to have two bachelorette parties in the same month,” Andy grumbled, pulling at the tie around his neck.

A quick tug of the clip-on tie and the blue fabric soon followed his lab coat, Andy happily grabbing and squirming into his worn, familiar blue and white hoodie that already made him feel more his age of twenty-two instead of thirty-five. The next time he was given a job recommendation, he would sooner change regions. 

Throwing his satchel around his shoulders and pulling on his old black-and-blue hat he had found in a thrift shop advertising some pokemon tournament from years ago, Andy shot a glance towards the clock in the room and booked it back to the elevator. The trains — especially those of Gear Station — waited for no man. 

Thankfully he made good time through the rest of the building, stepping out of the elevator and onto the bottom floor when the reverabting bark of a Houndoom had him feeling like his heart was about to throw up, give out, or both. He knew — he knew — that the Houndoom was tamed and registered and belonged to the security guard behind the desk who was quietly hushing him, but that didn’t mean anything. 

It didn’t mean anything because as always — as always — he heard his mother’s words whispering through his mind, sharp and cold and so, so true.

Pokemon are dangerous, darling. You’ve seen how much harm they can do, haven’t you? Your friend, Mandy? She was out of school for two weeks because her Houndoom burned her… and they can do a lot worse than that. 

“Evening, Andy!” The guard called — Rupert, if Andy could remember right, which he wasn’t sure that he could. “Don’t worry about the gruff old boy here, you know how he is.” 

“Right.” Andy snapped out robotically, trying to tamp down on his shakes as the Houndoom looked at him and remember, darling, Pokemon are dangerous. You can never trust a creature that could hurt you so easily. “Have a good night.” 

Getting out into the main roads, Andy closed his eyes and took a sharp breath. The Pokemon in Nimbasa were never wild. They all belonged to trainers that could recall them and hide them away in pokeballs. Andy wasn’t in danger in a city this big. He wasn’t.

But what if a Pokemon disobeys its trainer? They warn young trainers all the time, after all, that’s why the Gym Challenge is so important. You can never trust a Pokemon, darling, not even a trained one. You should only fear them-

“Not the time,” Andy muttered forcefully, pushing the old thoughts and memories out of his head as he sped walked towards Gear Station. Every cry and scuttle of a pokemon that he heard had his heart rate ramping right back up, already on edge from something like a Houndoom barking at him. “Not. The time.”

He was getting better, as Lenora liked to point out. Andy didn’t always flinch when pokemon were near him, after all. He sometimes could handle being right beside them and not even feel his heart race! It was just… the bigger pokemon that still set him back. The dangerous pokemon. The battles… 

“Almost home,” Andy cut his thoughts off before almost shoving his glasses off his face with how hard he rubbed at his eyes. It, surprisingly, did nothing to help the headache that was forming. Damn screens. “Almost home and then I can sleep all weekend.”

Getting into Gear Station proper, and with his heart still racing more than he would have liked, Andy did his best to block out anything and everything that had to do with pokemon and battling. Considering he was in Gear Station which was home of the Battle Subway, it was harder than he would have liked. 

Still. He was nothing if not stubborn. He managed to focus on the sounds of the buskers over those of pokemon cries. He managed to keep his gaze on the ground, eyes skipping to the shoes and looking away quickly when seeing paws, claws, or tails. It was when he was passing by one of the battle cars that he resorted to burying himself in his xtrans, muttering under his breath as he flipped open the screen to the keypad and began drafting a message to Lenora. 

The woman may not have been his mother, but she sure acted like it when worrying about him. It was nicer than Andy would admit to most times. Still, a message letting her know that yes, he was on his way home and no, he had not been mugged and left for dead by Team Plasma holdouts was in order. 

Dodging the influx of people — because Gear Station, one of the biggest parts of Nimbasa City, even when it was so close to closing, was never not busy — and doing his best to avoid eye contact with any trainers or pokemon, Andy just made it onto his train before the doors were closing shut behind him.

“Cutting it close,” Andy muttered to himself, lightly rolling his neck and getting a few cracks out before collapsing onto a blessedly empty set of seats. The train car was fuller than it normally was on a Friday night heading towards Nacrene City, but all Andy cared about was that he was sitting down, his tired eyes were finally shut and resting, and the familiar overhead announcements all blurred together overhead. 

And then, of course, the pleasant greetings and reminders faded for, “And remember that the Battle Subway tracks run every day except Sunday and Wednesday! Detailed schedules for the battle cars can be found all across Gear Station or-”

Andy, deciding that when it came to pokemon and battling he did not want to think about it, dug out his headphones. He crammed them in before he even had them turned on, the sounds of the announcements already muffled.

Familiar motions had his blessed, wonderful xtrans playing his usual music set, an alarm ready to go to wake him up for when he would definitely pass out on the train like he usually did, and his emails from the Nacrene City Museum and Lenora pulled up. He was almost certain he managed to get a full two sentences in about the de-extinction program Lenora headed when unconsciousness hit. 

⁂

Andy startled awake by choking on an interrupted snore-turned-grunt as his back hit the seats of the bench he was sitting on, one earbud falling out as he blearily looked up at the ceiling of the subway. His first thought was that it was remarkably clean for being a subway car. His second thought was that the sudden stop of the train must have meant they were at one of the stops along the route — possibly his. 

“Okay, okay, I’m up,” Andy mumbled to himself, grateful his earbud headphones were the ones with a cord that rested around his neck. He did not want to have to go digging for a lost earbud- Ah, announcements. 

“-thank you for riding on the Yellow Line with us today and welcome to Gear Station. Please remember to take all belongings, items, and pokemon with you and have a safe journey to your next destination.” 

“Yellow Line,” Andy muttered, looking around the now empty car with utter bafflement. It wasn’t like the Gear Station trains to get their announcements mixed up and wrong. They must have, though, since Andy had boarded the Orange Line. “Weird.” 

Bringing up his wrist to check the time, Andy blinked at the empty screen of his xtrans, remaining black even as he prodded at the power button and tapped the screen. His xtrans was dead. Huh. 

Standing up, Andy shifted his satchel to rest more comfortably on his shoulder as he peeked out the door and looked at the outside of the train. Instead of a long, orange line that stretched out around the entire train, it was yellow. 

Another look around showed Gear Station, the normal Agents waiting to take tickets or standing at the counter no longer there. Stepping back onto the train, Andy slowly sat down and looked to the scrolling bulletin board above the doors to the next cart. It read their location, Gear Station, and the time, 9:48pm. 

“Huh. Alright.” Okay. Things were lining up and starting to click together. Andy had not boarded the Orange Line, but rather the Yellow. With how he had been avoiding the pokemon and trainers, he must’ve mixed up his trains since they sat right next to each other at the station. 

Another glance down to his xtrans, still dead, revealed why he must have not heard his alarm or any music, now that he thought about it. His xtrans had died due to a low battery. He vaguely remembered making a mental note to charge it before he left work. He hadn’t. Hence, no alarm to wake him up when he had drifted off.

Alright. That meant he was alone at Gear Station, which sat in the second busiest city in Unova, at night. It also meant his xtrans was dead and he had no way to contact anyone and, with the late night, he was most likely stuck there until morning. He had probably already missed the last train to Nacrene City. 

That meant he was stuck. He was stuck. He felt lost. He absolutely felt overwhelmed. There were no buses that went from Nimbasa to Nacrene, especially not this late at night. He didn’t have the money for any sort of cab service or hell, even a hotel room. He doubted his workplace would let him crash there for the night. He didn’t even know anyone in Nimbasa, let alone have anyone to trust to crash at their place for the night and-

He heard the cry of a pokemon from somewhere in the station, something large and loud and almost angry-The last coherent thing Andy was really aware of was his breathing speeding up, those familiar whispers seeping into his head and you really can’t do anything right, can you, dear? If you run off on your own like that, all those pokemon are going to just gobble you right up.

[bilboyagathechickenfootedhobbit]

There’s definitely some difference in perspective considering the nearly quarter century difference in age 😂 I grew up in a time when we weren’t constantly bombarded with advertising. The advertising that existed was FUCK AWFUL, but if you didn’t watch TV or read magazines you could avoid the worst of it. Your generation is growing up in a time where, no matter where you turn you are inundated with toxic messaging, usually disguised as a message of empowerment, so it’s only natural that the methods my generation used to express themselves aren’t well-known to you guys. You guys get fed media that tells you how to be subversive, but it’s really just corporate conformity repackaged in a punk aesthetic, which is how you get conservative punks.

Etsy is a great source for buying unique handmade clothes, although more and more it seems you have to click to like page 16 to find a vendor that isn’t just drop-shipping cheap shit from China. I’d suggest local thrift stores, hitting yard/estate sales (rich old ladies have some of the COOLEST AND WEIRDEST SHIT, yo!), bazaars, flea markets, and my fav, clothing swaps. We even created a clothing corner at my last job, where people could bring in articles of clothing to donate and we just had a big closet back by the student lounge and you could take whatever you wanted. It was a great way for our students on a budget to get new clothes, and it was a nice encouragement for the staff to go through their closets regularly. Twice a year we would reserve a classroom to do a huge clothing swap where we would take donations for a month and then set up the classroom with tables and have all the clothes laid out for people to browse. I got the most AMAZING white faux fur jacket at one. I feel like a princess in it, it’s nothing I ever would have thought to buy, but for free? It’s become one of my favorite winter coats.

The point being, sometimes you can find cool clothes that aren’t in big brand stores, but sometimes you have to make it happen yourself, be it creating a community clothing swap, learning to sew, or actively seeking out small vendors/fairs/markets. But we all have to start somewhere, and the important thing is to start. It’s become so second nature to me to seek out alternative avenues for clothes that I was completely taken aback the other day when someone asked me where on EARTH I managed to find my outlandish clothes. I was like “uh, same as everyone? I dug through some dead persons closet and combined it with some fabric scraps from my sewing bin?” I was not expecting the weird look I got, and then I was like “oh yeah, this person gets their clothes at Target…….” No hate, but I was just like “what do you mean you don’t drive around looking for estate sales to plunder?”

I’ve very much enjoyed this; as you can tell, I’m always happy to entertain questions. Bouncing ideas back and forth is how we learn and grow, and there’s no age limit on that!

On the topic of not wearing makeup, look, I know it’s hard to give it up. It’s hard when you’ve grown used to how your face looks with it on and you find your natural face to look…..off. Washed out. Not right. Icky. I get it.

But look. I am 42 years old, I have not exactly taken the best care of myself (WAY too much drinking/drugs/partying in my 20’s and 30’s) I don’t exercise nearly as much as I should and I’m just…..man, I’m just making it through each day. I don’t do facials or microdermabrasion or any of that shit. I have a vitamin c facial cleanser, rose water toner, and a vitamin c moisturizer. That’s it. I don’t wear makeup, I don’t do masks and treatments and peels on my face. I wear a sunhat with built in SPF when I’m outdoors and that is literally the full extent of what I do for my face.

And you gyns…..the number of times I have been mistaken for being AT LEAST ten years younger than I am is ASTOUNDING. I gave up makeup and let my skin heal and suddenly I went from “Oh you say you’re in your 40’s? That tracks” to “Bull fucking SHIT you’re 42!!! You’re maybe 30, TOPS, what the hell??” When I was still wearing makeup I once got mistaken for my husband’s MOTHER, okay?? And that man has silver all throughout his fucking hair.

Look, nobody really knows what any particular age looks like on any individual. I’ve known women in their 60’s that passed as peers of mine in my 20’s because they had gorgeous high cheekbones and skin like porcelain. I’ve known teenage boys that looked like fucking narcs. Nobody knows what any age is “supposed” to look like. But I CAN tell you that if you give up makeup and let your skin heal, you will look healthier and more vibrant than you ever have at any point with a layer of chemicals on your face. Maybe you’ll look younger maybe not, who cares? But your skin WILL be healthier, and it will show.

It’s hard to take the first step, and if you aren’t able to do it over a holiday break, you’ll probably have to accept that you’ll get some looks and comments from your peers. But I cannot stress enough how, once you make the adjustment, you’ll grow so used to and in love with your natural face that the idea of putting makeup on will disgust you; it will look weird and clownish and as “not right” as your natural face once did to you.

And the more of us that eschew makeup, the easier it will get for other women to follow in our footsteps. We lead by example and the more of us not wearing makeup there are, the more normal it will seem for other women.

If you can’t give it all up at once, try to scale it back. Ditch the eyeshadow and just do mascara. Ditch the concealer and just do a light foundation. Scale it back at your own pace, but with the end goal always being to completely eliminate it.

You will feel so much better for it. Eventually. Just push through to the other side.

[arrowflier]

I'd like to see Ian and Mickey celebrating their 20th anniversary? Being all mature and grown up and realising how lucky they are they're still in love after all those years x

Mickey woke up to a weight over his back, pushing him down into the soft pillow-top mattress. Lips touched the back of his neck, warm and dry, Ian’s breath raising goosebumps on his skin.

“Mmm,” Mickey hummed, rubbing his smile into the pillow. “Good morning, Mr. Milkovich.”

Ian chuckled, a gentle huff of air that moved the hairs on the back of Mickey’s head.

“Good morning to you, Mr. Gallagher,” he murmured back, voice husky from sleep, lips brushing down to Mickey’s shoulder. He pulled the strap of Mickey’s tank top to the side, pressed a kiss to the pale skin it revealed.

“Happy Anniversary, Mick,” he said, kissing it into Mickey’s body. Mickey arched back against him, getting a hand up to hold Ian’s where it still rested on his shoulder.

“Twenty fucking years,” Mickey said proudly, and pushed back until Ian rolled over, letting Mickey do the same.

He moved from stomach to side to back, letting Ian settle back in on top of him once they were face to face. Ian’s bare chest was warm through Mickey’s own shirt.

“Long time, man,” Mickey said softly, reaching up to card gentle fingers through Ian’s hair. It glimmered red in the faint sunlight coming through the curtains, shot through with a few paler streaks that Ian swore were blond, not grey.

“And longer to come,” Ian promised, his smile bright and sleepily content.

They lay there for a moment, watching each other blink, watching each other breathe. Then Ian sighed, and lowered his head, capturing Mickey’s lips in their first real kiss of the morning.

It tasted terrible, but they were long past the days of caring about stale morning breath. The innocent slide of mouths gave way to sucking kisses, chapped lips pulled gently between teeth, soothed with tongues. Ian pulled back with a wet sound, moved his mouth up Mickey’s jaw, and pressed searching lips to the space just under his ear.

Mickey hummed, eyes slipping closed at the warmth of the sensation. The bed was soft under him, Ian comfortable over him, and he wanted nothing more than to live in that moment forever.

Or at least for a little while longer.

Ian had other plans.

“Ready for your present?” he breathed into Mickey’s ear, biting the lobe as Mickey shivered.

“Never thought I’d say this,” Mickey muttered as Ian traced his tongue down the side of his neck, “but I think I’d rather go back to sleep for a bit.”

Ian laughed, burying his face in Mickey’s shoulder, breath cooling the trail his mouth had left.

“I don’t blame you,” he admitted easily, rolling off of Mickey again to lay at his side instead. His arm crossed Mickey’s chest, hand secure around his bicep. “Last night was a mess; I’m ready to sleep for a week.”

“Remind me never to let your daughter go to a concert again,” Mickey said plaintively, turning his head to face Ian’s on the pillow. “I don’t care if we’re supposed to be her safe space or what-the-fuck-ever, picking up a bunch of drink teenagers in the middle of the night is not my idea of a good time.”

“Please,” Ian said, “Like you’d ever tell your daughter no.”

Fair enough.

“But regardless,” Ian continued, “we don’t have too long before the girls are up, and I wanted to give you your present in peace.”

“Fine,” Mickey grumbled, putting on a show of being disappointed. He rolled onto his side, reaching for the drawer of the bedside table, but Ian whacked his hand before he could open it.

“Thought you wanted to give me my present?” Mickey asked, eyebrows raised, but Ian shook his head.

“Not that kind of present, you dolt,” he laughed. “We can do that later, once we have the house to ourselves.”

Ian’s face softened as he bit his lip, eyes darting away from Mickey’s for a brief moment before coming back.

“I, uh,” he said, scratching his chin. “I kinda got you something else.”

“We said we weren’t buying shit, Ian,” Mickey pointed out. “Between tuition and fuckin’ club dues, we ain’t got a lot to spare right now.”

“I know, but…” Ian shrugged. “We had enough for this.”

He leaned over, reaching long arms under the bed, squirming until he found what he was feeling for. With a twist of his shoulders, he was back up on the bed and tossing a small box at Mickey without aiming.

Mickey fumbled it, then snatched it back off the sheets before Ian could see. He turned it in his hands, suspicious, but the twitch of his lips gave him away.

“Go on, open it,” Ian encouraged, scooting closer. “I think you’ll like it.”

Mickey did, untying the tiny bow and lifting the lid off the box with no fuss.

“I went with the modern theme,” Ian told him as he looked inside. “Platinum. Thought that fit us a little better than fine china.”

Mickey didn’t answer, eyes caught on the glint of metal peeking out from under a scrap of cheap tissue paper.

“It’s supposed to represent how strong we are, together,” Ian said as Mickey lifted his gift out of the box, turning it over in his hands. “That we’ve made it this far, overcome shit.” His eyes were on Mickey’s hands. “That we’re still here to stay.”

Mickey held his gift up toward the window, letting the light reflect off the silver surface. Just a keychain, a little metal charm in the shape of a record dangling from a short chain. The word “Always” was engraved along the top curve, and at the bottom, the date of their wedding.

“It’s not really platinum, obviously,” Ian said, twisting the sheet between his fingers. “I couldn’t afford that even if I—”

“Ian,” Mickey cut him off. “Shut up. I love it.”

When their eyes met, Ian was beaming.

“C’mere, you sappy idiot,” Mickey ordered with his own broad grin, and Ian met him with a single, lingering kiss.

Mickey pulled away before it could become anything more.

“Got you somethin’ to,” he said, watching Ian’s eyes from inches away. “’Cept I figured you were the traditional sort, so…” He shrugged. “Guess what you get?”

“Sex?” Ian joked, and Mickey rolled his eyes, standing up and swinging his legs out of bed.

“Not quite,” he answered dryly, opening their closet door and fishing through the dirty clothes on the floor inside. He lifted a much larger box with a muffled oomph, and carried it over to the bed, where he let it fall a bit on heavily onto the mattress in front of Ian.

“Go on,” he started, but Ian hadn’t waited anyway, already tearing off the paper with eager fingers.

“Jeez, you’re like a fuckin’ kid on Christmas,” Mickey laughed, and Ian stuck out his tongue as he pried the cardboard box open.

Ian paused as the contents were revealed, the pushed aside bubble wrap and packing paper to lift out a single, dessert-sized plate.

It was fragile and white, plain in the center, with bursts of blue and pink along the outer, silver-plated edge. The colors swirled together into petals, shaped like—

“Stargazer lilies,” Ian breathed, and his eyes were wet when he lifted them. “Mickey, they’re beautiful.”

“Yeah, well,” Mickey hedged, sitting on the edge of the bed. “So are you, you soft fucker.”

Ian’s breath caught.

“Not the same theme as yours,” Mickey said, gesturing to the plate with a hand that still held his own gift. “But the ideas kind of the same, you know?”

He reached out, took the plate from Ian’s hands.

“You said the platinum was for strength; well this shit’s pretty fragile,” he continued. “But it stays good if you take care of it.” He looked up at Ian. “And we take pretty damn good care of each other.”

“You know that stuff’s not gonna last in this house,” Ian pointed out, voice choked. “We might take care of each other, but we take terrible care of our stuff.”

“Might not even make it through tonight,” Mickey agreed. He traced a finger around the rim of the plate, the flowers there. “But we’re gonna use it anyway.”

He turned, set the plate down on the bedside table, along with his keychain. Hoisted the rest of the box down onto the floor. “We can have nice stuff,” he said as he did, “but I ain’t gonna be one of those people that leaves shit in a cabinet gettin’ all dusty.”

“Nah,” Ian agreed, wiping his leaking eyes. “That really wouldn’t be us.”

Mickey smiled, and leaned in, kissing the corner of Ian’s eye and the happy tears lingering there.

“No it wouldn’t,” he said softly, and then his grin turned wicked.

“And speaking of using things,” he said, flopping down onto his back, arms spread wide. “We should use the rest of the morning to our advantage ‘til the girls get up.” He waggled his eyebrows, glorying in Ian’s wet laugh.

“Come show me what the next twenty years will be like, lover boy,” Mickey challenged.

And climbing over him with a toothy grin, all else forgotten in favor of getting hands on skin, Ian did just that.

[secondhand-trash]

Put a Ring on It

A/N: I started it with the intention of writing a thirst post but it ended up being 1.7k of pure fluff lmao

Pairing: Miya Atsumu x reader

Description: Miya Atsumu had a thing for wearing rings.

Word count: 1772

-

Miya Atsumu had a thing for wearing rings.

Maybe it was how he thought that they made his hands looked bigger, or how the accents never failed to draw even more attention to his slender fingers. Likely, it was just the way how most teenage boys went through a phase of wanting to look stylish and edgy without really bothering to look into having an actual style of their own, resulting in him halting a baggy t-shirt, cargo pants and an unnecessary amount of rings as the peak of men’s fashion. You had your own thoughts on how he was so determined to slip a ring or two into whatever he was wearing whenever he was out of his uniform. You made fun of his sense of fashion none stop, pointing to his bleached hair that has faded from the gold it was supposed to be into a sharp yellow and cheap chunky jewelry as the main culprit.

“You look like a delinquent who smokes cheap cigarettes in parks after school.”

You sniggered when he let out an offended ‘huh’. His chunky silver rings that had obnoxiously prominent carvings on the side brushed dug into the gap between your fingers as he squeezed your hand tighter when he snapped towards your direction. Your free hand, the one that wasn’t in a lock hold by his ring clad one, reached out to brush away his side-swooped bangs. His hair was fried from the boxed bleach he used regularly but as a side perk, the dryness did add to the volume of his hair.

He stood there still as you carefully pushed his hair back, his upper body leaning towards your direction just a little so you didn’t have to struggle to reach him despite his initial protests. You were messing with his hair and he was looking at you, only at you, with his fingers still linked with yours even though you always complained about his rings making it hard for you to hold his hand.

You finally pulled back and your gaze dropped from his bangs to his eyes. Your heart skipped a beat when you met his eyes and they were full of you.

You cursed your weak heart for its sudden moment of swooning when he stood back up straight and his ring scratched against the inside of your finger.

You sighed, “You are so lucky you have a nice face so that people will be too caught up to notice how you dressed.”

Atsumu pretended he couldn’t hear the second half of the sentence and decided to focus on how you said he had a nice face instead.

But then you graduated from high school and he slowly started dressing less like a disastrous teenage boy and more like a proper adult. That athlete money did him well and he was finally able to dress the way he wanted to dress without having to turn into a questionable direction because of monetary limits. The baggy pants were gone from his closet, replaced with pants that actually fit his body and elevate things instead of holding back the visual upper hand he was supposed to have because of his physiques. He finally stopped bleaching his own hair after your many years of nagging but you nearly lost your composure when he showed up in front of your door to pick you up with his new hair for the first time.

“I got the stylist to trim my bangs for me,” he said as he ran his hand through the curl sitting at the side of his forehead and you gulped when you realised that his hair was soft enough for fingers to go through them with ease now, “I’m still trying to get used to not having things over my eye.”

“Oh?” you replied, your voice breathy as you tried to calm down your sea of thoughts at the sight of your boyfriend’s new look. 

You were aware that he was good looking, but everything that he was not born with used to be questionable so it balanced things out. Now he was wearing tight-fitted jeans that made his legs look even more toned as if it was even possible, with a white t-shirt that was tugged in loosely. He had a blazer on too, probably because you made him take you somewhere nice in celebration of his first VLeague cheque, but at this point you were almost certain he had that thing on just to drive you insane. 

And his hair, his god damn windswept fluffy no longer bright yellow hair.

“Do you think I should grow it longer?” he asked as he rubbed the tip of his bangs between the pads of his finger. The silver that sat at the bottom of his digits contrasted starkly with the pale gold and it finally dawned upon you that he stopped wearing the cheap rings you used to make fun of him for a while ago. 

Oh dear, now he was actually hot.

“No,” you blurted out, “it looks nicer this way.”

"You think so?” he asked as you forced your legs to move past your door before shutting it behind your back firmly. You had to force yourself to go out before the urge to make him come in could win, or else you would most certainly end up doing things that would make you miss your reservation.

And you had been excited to leech off of his athlete money.

“Yes, yes I do think so,” you said as you grabbed his hand to pull him along with you. 

You groaned in satisfaction when you realised his new rings did not stop you from sliding your fingers between his like the old ones did.

You started having fewer objections towards his choice of accessaries after his general fashion sense shifted for the better. You even started liking the rings after a while, crediting it to him opting for designs with more simplicity. You liked the way the metal was already warm from his heat when he put his hand on your thigh out of nowhere because he was bored, or when he was at the driver’s seat and the pad of his finger drummed against your skin steadily as he waited for the lights to change. The warmth of his hand always brought you security and he was well aware that nothing called your attention to him like it did. You were not even sure if he was aware, but he had a habit of toying with his rings whenever you were neglecting him because you had your attention on something else. The band he was playing with always ended up off his finger and up yours when you were least expecting it, the feeling of his calloused finger holding your hand as he slid it down always managed to call your gaze back to him.

‘What a child,’ you chuckled to yourself when he looked at you innocently like he could not be having any hidden thoughts, his hand still holding onto yours as he held the ring that was too large for your finger from falling down.

So being the child he was, who always couldn’t fathom the thought of letting you leave his side and was equally eager to let the world know he wasn’t leaving yours, it did not surprise you at all when you were tidying up your drawers one day to find a velvet box tugged all the way back into his sock drawer.

You had a feeling it was exactly what you thought it was, and you laughed at the image of him trying to find somewhere to hide it in the house while you were not around.

Of course, leave it up to Miya Atsumu to hide a ring at the back of his sock drawer because he thought it was the one place you wouldn’t look into unless you were left with no choice.

You giggled to yourself and closed the drawer, letting the box stayed right where it was.

You weren’t looking. You wanted to, but you weren’t. Because you knew he would whine to no end if you didn’t look as surprised as he wanted you to be when he finally showed it to you for real.

He still had no clue that you already knew it was coming when he got down on one knee and took the box out of his pocket with shaky hands. He cried when you said yes and you cried when he started crying, even though you had already rehearsed in your head for a million times on how you would say yes ever since you saw the velvet box inside of his sock drawer. 

He was still sobbing when he realised he needed to get up from the ground, wiping his tears away on the sleeve of his very expensive blazer before clumsily taking the ring out of the box to put it on your finger. Miya Atsumu was an ugly crier through and through and you finally admitted to yourself that you were a whipped fool when you still wanted to kiss his stupid face even though his eyes were swollen and he missed your finger a few times before finally getting the ring in.

“Now we match,” he said with a hiccup, laughing but sounding like he was about to break down into another round of tears as soon as the chuckle left his mouth, “you can’t make fun of my rings anymore.”

He was so dumb, and you felt like crying again when he took out an identical ring from his pocket and put it on his own hand. Who the hell does that? You wanted to laugh at him but you couldn’t, because you knew you would start sobbing again if you do that.

“You’re an idiot,” you said, grabbing his hand to steady him because he was shaking and you were sure he might just drop the ring if he kept fidgeting.

He sniffled, grinning ear to ear through his tears when he saw the ring that sat on your finger.

“So?” he said, happily holding your hand in his to look at how perfectly it fits, the rings and your hands, “You can’t get rid of me now, I got the ring to prove it.”

You huffed, but couldn’t stop yourself from smiling when he rubbed his fingers along his engagement ring like he was making sure that it was still there.

You decided that it would be your favourite ring of his until you get to put the wedding band onto his finger yourself.

[plus-size-reader]

One Date

Tommy Milner x Plus size!reader

Word Count: 2113 words

Warnings: none

Summary: Tommy asks that reader out but she refuses because she’s sure he’s pranking her

—————————————————————————————————

You knew he was lying.

He had to be lying.

In all your life, you never imagined Tommy Milner showing any interest in you at all, and you had known him almost that long. You went to school together, his older sister used to babysit you, and your dad even got all your eggs from his family's farm.

There was no way you couldn’t have known him.

You had lived in Mill Valley all your life, and that was just the sort of thing that came along with living in such a small town. Everyone knew everyone, and there was no getting away from that.

Knowing about Tommy though was hardly the problem.

Your current problem was that while you were minding your own business at your locker, Tommy approached you. It may not have seemed that strange at first but the context made it weird.

Tommy Milner never talked to you.

Aside from cruel jokes made at your expense by his friends on the football team or asking you to scoot over in the auditorium, you weren’t even sure that he knew your name.

...But here he was, all the same.

It didn’t make any sense to you, but you did your best to keep your uncertainty covered up with a slight nod in acknowledgment.

That was all you did, all you managed to do, before he blurted out what he’d been thinking about this whole time as if it was no big deal.

“Do you wanna go out with me?”

That was it.

Just like that, those words were hanging in the air all around you and frankly, you weren’t sure how to react. You considered pretending that you didn’t hear him, or moving to another city and changing your name.

Anything would be better than making a total fool out of yourself like you were bound to now.

You couldn’t win.

You wanted to assume that he wasn’t talking to you, because that would be easier but even that was complicated.

If you reacted like he didn’t say it and he meant it, he would feel bad but if you responded like he did say it and it wasn’t meant for you, that would be even more humiliating.

It had to be a joke.

So, the best thing you could do was try and play it cool.

In fact, it wasn’t until he repeated himself that you glanced away from the inside of your locker.

Part of you was sort of hoping he would just go away, and leave you be. However, it would seem that you wouldn’t be so lucky.

Clearly, he wasn’t going to go anywhere. You would have to do something, and the more you stood here, the more awkward it would be.

You immediately regretted looking at him, because it made it much too real.

He was serious about this whole thing.

“You’re talking to me?” you clarified, feeling sort of silly over it but you couldn’t help it. You had never really spoken to him in your life, and you weren’t sure where this was coming from.

You just couldn’t make this whole thing make any sense.

“Yeah, I am” Tommy allowed, acting like that would do anything to clear up the situation you were currently in. Those three words didn’t do anything to clear up this thing, or make you feel any better.

If anything, all it did was leave you that much more confused.

“You want to go out with me?” you repeated, still wishing that he wouldn’t have started this in the first place. This was exhausting, and you were sure that nothing good was going to come from this.

It just felt like a huge mistake, and you didn’t even understand what exactly was going on right now.

“Yeah, that’s kind of what that means” he sighed, really surprised you two were still talking about it. Usually when he asked out a girl, they didn’t waste any time in making sure to say yes.

This had never happened to him before.

Though, to be fair, this had never happened to you before either.

The guys in this town didn’t have any interest in you. You didn’t feel like you had anything to offer them, and honestly, even if they did want to go out with you, there was no chance you’d say yes.

You didn’t want a cheap fling with some high school boy that didn’t actually care about you. You knew what you deserved, and what you deserved was more than some cheap make out or even worse.

What if this really was nothing more than a joke to him?

What if everyone in school was in on this and if you agreed to the date, it would be a Carrie White situation? You couldn’t possibly handle the embarrassment that would cause.

You would never be able to set foot in this school again after something like that.

“I don’t think so” you decided, after far too many moments of silence between the two of you as Tommy waited desperately for you to say something.

This was all so foreign for him, a man who never heard the word no.

A man who couldn’t figure out what was going on right now. He’d had his eye on you for days now, trying to figure out what the best way would be to get you to go out with him.

...And now, you were just going to turn him down.

It was hardly where he saw this conversation going.

“What do you mean? You don’t want to go out with me?” he asked, not even bothering to pick his jaw up from the floor. Tommy was lost, another thing that didn’t seem to be new for him.

You didn’t know one another that well, and he’d just come out of nowhere with an offer you had no idea what to do with. This wasn’t someone you were comfortable with or had any sort of relationship with.

You and Tommy might as well have been strangers.

“It’s not very nice to play with people’s feelings as a joke” you grumbled, gathering everything you needed from your locker and slamming it aggressively as you tried to walk away.

This would just be better for you. Making a fool out of yourself because of blind optimism would surely blow up in your face and you weren’t looking to be humiliated today.

That could wait for another day.

Unfortunately though, once again, Tommy seemed to have another thing in mind.

When he asked you to go out with him, he did it because he wanted you to say yes. If he wanted anything other than that, he would have asked for that instead.

Obviously, you’d gotten the wrong idea.

“Wait, what do you mean?” he sputtered, doing his best to follow you down the hallway without looking like an absolute idiot. It was clear to you that he had no real clue what was going on, but you didn’t care.

You knew what kind of person he was.

A guy like Tommy Milner only went out with girls like Ruthy Steinberg, girls that were prim and perfect, and put together all the time. You weren’t like that, and frankly, you weren’t even sure that she was.

In any case, Tommy couldn’t handle the woman that you were.

You weren’t going to lie to him in order to make him feel better and you certainly weren’t going to let him string you along for some stupid joke so that his friends could get a good laugh.

You were better than that.

“I know what you’re doing, and it's cruel” you repeated, not bothering to stop as he followed you, keeping a pretty good time as quick as you were walking to get away from him.

You weren’t going to explain basic human decency to him, and you weren’t about to try and get him to see you as a real person, an equal to him. You knew that something like that would never work.

His world only went as far as him.

“All I did was ask you out” he sighed, not putting the pieces together as well as you wished he would.

Normally, you would have rolled your eyes and told him to go to hell but when you took a second to look at him again, you saw something else there on his face.

He really didn’t know.

Tommy didn’t see the clear issue something like this would cause in such a small, gossipy town.

In his mind, this really was just what it looked like.

He liked you and when he liked someone, the natural progression was to do something about it. It didn’t make sense to him that you were making such a big deal out of this because it wasn’t.

It was what people did.

“I know, but it's much more complicated than that and you know it” you countered, gesturing slightly with a nod of your head over to the end of the hallway where his friends were all gathered, gawking at the two of you.

You could only imagine what they would have to say once they found out about this.

Assuming that you’d been wrong about Tommy and he meant well, that didn’t mean that all those chuckleheads would. Some of those jerks had been tormenting you since middle school and this would be nothing more than fuel for them.

You would never hear the end of it, and neither would Tommy.

That was your point.

You could guarantee that he hadn’t thought about what kinds of consequences this would have in his very secluded social life. His people would never let you in like they had all of his other girls in the past.

Nothing was going to be the same if he actually did this.

Tommy followed your gaze to the football players, all hooting and hollering to themselves as they watched the two of you walk together.

“You’re worried about them?” he hummed, his focus once again falling on you and ignoring all of the other attention on you both. Unlike you, he was accustomed to their dumb shit and stupid antics.

Ignoring them was what he did best.

“Yeah, I am”

The words left your lips as little more than a whisper, something you were hoping he hadn’t heard at all, but you wouldn’t be so lucky.

Tommy had put too much into this to just let you go so easily.

“I think we could have fun, we could go to the drive-in or something?” he suggested, ignoring the obvious upset that you’d been in earlier. He was sure that if you gave him a shot, he could prove he wasn’t so bad.

He wasn’t giving up.

“I don’t get why this is so important to you” you groaned, finally halting your movements entirely so that he would stop following you.

He was going to make you explain this to him, no matter what you wanted.

“Because, I think you’re really cool and I figured we could get to know each other a little better” he explained, his answer much more mature and decent than what you’d been expecting.

There wasn’t anything blatantly sexual or degrading about his answer.

Maybe he was right.

The two of you didn’t run in the same social circles and you barely knew one another outside of basic school functions but perhaps there was something there that you just couldn’t see yet.

Tommy may actually surprise you.

All you had to do was let him try.

“One movie, if you hate it, I’ll leave you alone” he promised, changing his approach in hopes that would make you agree. A single night wouldn��t kill you and after that, if you really weren’t into it, he would give up.

All he wanted was a chance.

...and he had a point.

A single night at the drive in with Tommy Milner couldn’t possibly be the end of the world.

“One date, just one” you sighed, not missing the small sparkle in his eyes when he finally realized what you meant before you turned away completely. You may have regretted this at some point, but giving him a chance was the least you could do.

If you rejected him based on an idea, you were no better than all the guys around here that didn’t want anything to do with you because of who they thought you were.

It wasn’t going to kill you.

You just had to remember that, and if anything else came out of it, you would owe him an apology.

Until then, all you owed him was one date.

[nightowlfandom]

Rich! Bad Boy!Min Yoongi- Try Me

Just wanna say if you see your name used here, I don’t have beef with you okay? I had a random name generator in another tab and just used the first name I saw.

Once again someone doesn’t want me to be great so....this might be the only post today because I....dunno I can’t post when I’m not in a good mood and its been real shitty.

CHECK OUT MY MASTERLIST HERE!!

X RATED PROMPT LIST| NON X RATED PROMPT LIST

RUN IN HERE AND COME GET Y’ALL JUICE

Leggo!

...

You were practically glued to his side. His arm was tightly wrapped around your waist as he led you across the room. You had perched your designer sunglasses on top of your head to get a clearer look at your surroundings. Why were you wearing sunglasses at night? Because you could, of course.

Your wore a backless floor length gown in one of his favorite colors. He had insisted you wear your fur coat, but you convinced him to let you leave it in the car. You were on full display, not only for him but for anyone else who thought that they had bought the most gorgeous date for the night. That title was forever and always reserved for Min Yoongi’s girl and tonight only proved it more and more. 

He walked with his held held high as if everyone around him was beneath him. His attired screamed ‘try me, bitch’ From his black suit and tie to crisp white dress shirt and shoes that were worth more than someone’s rent for five months. His hair was slicked back and while he didn’t bother to raise his own pair of shades, everyone could see the glare very evident on his face.

You two were the epitome of a power couple, in the most literal sense and everyone respected that.

“Mr. Min! Welcome!” a nervous and frantic looking man rushed up to you. “This must be your beautiful companion for the night.” he bowed repeatedly. So many times that you lost count. He held his hand out for you to take, but you were left to stare awkwardly. You had no idea what to do in that moment. After a second or two you held your hand out, which he shook a bit too aggressively.

Yoongi calmly used his free hand to raise his sunglasses up. “You gettin’ paid to rip my girl’s arm out its socket?”

“Oh! my apologies Mr. Min!” he instantly let your hand go. “I wasn’t aware.”

“You never are.” he scoffed, allowing his shades sit on the top of his head. “Is our table ready or did they send you here to waste our time?”

“You’re fashionably early! Your comrades haven’t arrived yet.” the host stammered. “Follow me!” he practically disappeared through the sea of people. 

“What a tool.” you spoke for the first time since you left the car. “I’ve never seen a bigger kiss-ass in my life.”

“Hm, trust me I’ve met worse. He’s just a dick-rider for the men who really own this place.” He leaned down and spoke into your ear. “Those guys will literally shit on someone else’s table if I tell them to.”

“How riveting.” you rolled your eyes playfully as he led you through the crowd. It was easy for people to get out of your way. One look from your boyfriend and they were hugged the nearest wall or throwing themselves against the various tables set up all over the place. “Remind me again why we’re here?”

“Don’t make that face.” He smirked. “I told you, official business.”

“And we couldn’t do that somewhere less...sleazy?” you scoffed at the old man with five different women on his arm. “Yoongi-”

“It’s only for a few hours.” he assured. “Then after that, we can do whatever you want, okay?”

“You said that last time.” you hid the pout forming on your face.

“You have my word.”

“Or so you say.” you slipped out of his grip. “Until you have more trash take out.” you shook your head as you walked ahead. Yoongi watched you from behind as you walked ahead. Of course you didn’t need him by your side to be considered intimidating. He bit his lip at the idea of ripping that dress off your body when you got back to the hotel. Shit, he might not even manage to keep his hands to himself in the car.

Yoongi joined you at the table. “ You feel like Soju tonight?”

“Depends on if you want me to start fighting or not.” you raised an eyebrow at Yoongi.

“Hm, on second thought how about imported beer.”

“This isn’t date night at your place, dear.” you replied jokingly.

“Hm, you’re right. It’s been a while since we’ve splurged. We can do wine tonight!” he chuckled in reply as you both sat down. Just as you both got settled, you were met by a small crowd. Yoongi’s friends, of course. 

“Oi! Watch how you handle my fucking jacket! It’s worth more than your life.” Namjoon snapped at that host.

“My apologies sir!”

“Yoongi, Y/N. Good to see you.” Seokjin shook Yoongi’s hand firmly. “Sorry we’re late.”

“We just arrived ourselves.” you replied, relaxing as Yoongi wrapped his arm around your waist again. “Yoongi insisted.”

“Of course he did.” Jungkook sat down. “I saw the other women glaring at you.” he laughed. “You sure know how to make an entrance.” he raised your hand to his lips for a short kiss to your knuckles.

“Of course she does. She’s the best looking woman here.” he huffed as if it was obvious. The host quietly bought the selection for the night.

“Wine for the lady, the usual for the rest of us.” Yoongi spoke for the table.

“Yes sir!”

Before anyone else could speak, a woman in a red dress and white fur coat strode up. “Yoongi? Is that you?”

“Meredith....fancy seeing you here.” Yoongi looked less than thrilled.

“Very!” she seemed a little too happy to see him. It was funny because you had never seen nor heard of this woman in your life. “So...I tried to call you.”

She was completely oblivious of you sitting right there and you didn’t like it.

“What are you doing here?” Seokjin annoyedly spoke up as his drink was poured. “If you couldn’t tell, we’re all trying to enjoy ourselves.”

“I just wanted to catch up with an old friend!” she put her hands up in defense. Her eyes suddenly landed on you. “Whose this?” she fixed her face in disgust

“Y/N L/N, who the fuck are you?” you raised an eyebrow. Your posture straightened up as she glared at you. You threw your sunglasses on the table, crossing your arms as you perked up.

“Are you Yoongi’s pet or something?” she put a hand on her hip. “ Guess they’ll let anyone in!”

“Pet? Oh Honey...Even if that were true it would still mean I’m sitting here and your standing there looking stupid....”

“Oh yeah. He’s probably waiting for the perfect moment to get rid of you!”

You held up a single hand to up Yoongi to signify that you didn’t want him to speak. He looked livid, however you didn’t see the point in him wasting his time or energy on this woman. You slowly stood up. The host held your glass of wine with shaky hands, unsure of what to do.

“Thank you.” you grabbed the glass from him. “Run along now.”

“Yes mam!” the scared host scurried off, obviously not wanting any confrontation. 

“Y/N, what are you doing?” Yoongi asked, watching you with weary eyes. You weren’t confrontational so this was a huge surprise.

“Meredith. That is your name, right?” you smiled sweetly. You took a sip from your glass. “Hm...What a darling coat! I bet it goes with anything.”

“Of course it does! It pairs best with red. I bought it in Paris...” she put a hand on her hip as if she was a model. “As you can see.”

“Too bad beautiful gowns and expensive fur doesn’t make the wearer any less cheap than the next bitch.” you instantly shut down the false sense of security you built for the disrespectful woman. 

“EXCUSE ME?!?”

“Not done yet....” you cleared your throat before speaking again. “ Whore, Pet, Wife ,Girlfriend, whatever you want to call me, go ahead but best believe my place in Yoongi’s life will always hold rank over you, my dear. You weren’t even important enough for him to tell me about you and we’ve been together for four years going on five as of two months from now.” You put your free hand on your hip. “That’s number one.” you laughed gleefully.

“Damn Yoongi, your girl has guts.” Namjoon whispered.

“That’s my babe.” Yoongi sat back and watched you drag Meredith for filth.

“Number Two! Before you try to feed me shit and call it sugar, make sure you take off the tags on your clothes.” You pointed to the obvious department store tag. “Clearance...nice. I also know fake diamonds when I see them, don’t play yourself.”

Nothing was wrong with fake gems, or clearance items...but pretending you were better than everyone else while lying...that wasn’t gonna go down.

The girl had went completely quiet now.

“Three. Last but not least. Get over this whole convoluted ‘I’m better than you’ ideals you follow because the same people you turn your nose up at are the same people who you rely on on a day to day basis. Shiny hair, expensive clothes, and a posse of fake friends who tell you everything you want to hear does not guarantee happiness. Insulting me because it gives you short lived joy does not guarantee happiness. Pretending you actually have any sense of class when it’s obvious you faked your way to the top of social stardom does not guarantee happiness.” you put your wine glass on the table. “So before I proceed to tell you to go fuck yourself and to stay away from me and my BOYFRIEND...any questions?”

Not even five seconds passed and this woman walked off without another word. You didn’t feel bad, not by a long shot. Respect is something that’s earned any ANYONE who didn’t understand that could get a piece of you.

You sat back down next to Yoongi, grabbing your wine again. “Gentlemen, forgive me for that outburst.”

“Damn babe.” Yoongi wrapped his arm around you again. “That was hot.”

“Good because I’m highly fucking livid right now.” you calmly took a sip of your wine. “Who was that woman?” you turned to glare at Yoongi.

“She was an actress who was paid to portray my wife for a business thing I was forced to do.” he shook his head. “Y/N I promise she means nothing to me. It was before we even met.”

“Good. Let another girl talk crazy to me, I’ll kill you both.” you said with a straight face. “Her for thinking she can talk to me any way she wants, and you for keeping things from me. I will cut you deep, sir.”

“Damn I love you.” he bit his lip. He turned your head towards himself to give you a deep kiss. 

...

As he had promised, he could barely keep his hands off you in the car. The minute the doors had shut, Yoongi had the hem of your dress bunched up in his fist. His lips feverishly laid open mouth kisses along your exposed neck. 

“Yoongi, we shouldn’t do this here.” you whimpered, even though your actions said the completely opposite.

“Why? No one is gonna stop me. They damn sure won’t say shit about it.” Yoongi stopped for a split second to turn a glare to the limo driver, who was trying very hard not to look in the rear view mirror. “PUT THE FUCKING DIVIDER UP.” he barked.

“Yes sir!!”

Yoongi pushed you down onto the seats, causing you to let out a laugh. The divider was put up and you could hear the sound of fabric ripping.

He had tore a rip up your dress.

“Goodbye $3,000 dress.” you huffed.

“More where that came from.” he laughed, which was quickly replaced with a sadistic smile. “Spread your legs, baby.” he pouted. “Daddy wants to finger you”

“In the car-"

 “When we get back to the hotel, I want you naked on that bed.” he growled. “If not, I’ll fucking rip whatever you have left off.”

... (The Hotel)

He couldn’t even keep his hands to himself in the elevator, any part of you he could get his hands on, he touched. By the time you two had gotten back to the room, you were thrown on the bed. Your dress had a huge tear up the leg and the straps were holding up either. Yoongi had discarded every article of clothing except his pants which were hanging low on his hips at this point.

“How do you want me?” he flicked his tongue against his bottom lip, looking you up and down. “I’ll do whatever you want, babe.” He watched as your shy wall was quickly put up and he couldn’t help but laugh. “Baby doesn’t know?”

“Nuh uh.” you hid behind your hands with a shy smile.

“Hm...my hands?”

“hm....nuh uh.” you shook your head again.

“Hm...my mouth then?” he bit his lips, standing right in front of you. “Where was that fire, honey? Come on.” he grabbed your hands. “Want me to eat that pretty pussy, baby?” He gathered the rest of your dress in his fist. “Come here.”

He began kissing up your bare thighs. You shook your legs, biting your lip. You felt him pull your panties down.

“You were so brave for me, sexy girl. Where’s that fighting spirit? Do you want me to eat this sweet little- hmm.” he dragged his tongue up your slit, laying opened mouthed kisses along your pussy. “You’re brave for the outside world but you still need daddy to take care of you, huh?”

“Mhm!” you nodded desperately.

“Baby you taste so fucking good.” he laughed, lashing his tongue against your hot flesh. “You’re moving so much.” he cackled. “Hmm” he dug his nails into your thighs. “You like it when I eat this pussy?” 

“This is mine.” he mumbled against your heat. “This is all mine. Don’t think I’m done with you yet...”

[gottagobackintime]

Thor: Love and Thunder spoilers. 

This is in no particular order, it’s just me rambling as per usual.

Korg is going to be a dad 😭 I need a series with him and Dwayne (omg… did he call him Dwayne because he’s made of rocks… I just got that… I’m so stupid!) raising their child. Also Taika was right, he really is a gay icon now! (And I thought that we’d never get to see Korg find someone because Taika did an interview around Ragnarok where he said something about his Korg being gay but that they weren’t going to really explore that. I love that we got this, even if it was just a brief scene.)

Love that Thor’s roommate was in the film even if it was brief.

Our Last Summer by Abba playing in the Thor/Jane montage was *chef’s kiss*. Also loved that we got to see glimpses of their love story, since the only thing we’ve gotten up until this point is them kind of getting together in Thor and then they’ve broken up by the time The Dark World takes place. Which was... you know, kind of weird. But the montage was great and it filled in the gaps nicely. Also Thor looking at the child in the store they were passing made me tear up. And Korg saying Thor would be a great dad 😭

Korg mentioning Val’s girlfriend that died! I love how insightful Korg is, but he’s also very stupid sometimes, love it. 

Korg telling Thor that he should call Axl the name he wanted to be called, amazing. Also I liked that while Thor insisted that Axl should go by the name Heimdall gave him it didn’t feel malicious, more misguided, and I’m not saying that that wouldn’t hurt too. But I feel like it was a good way to introduce that topic and deal with it. Because he felt it honoured his dead friend by his son still going by the name he gave him, but then he accepted it and he used the name Axl choose.

I’m really curious now how Korg’s species family dynamics are like. Because in Ragnarok he mentions his mum and his stepdad. But in this one he says that he had two dads who were the ones who “created” him. 

I loved Jane’s storyline, I was sad that she died but I feel like they opened up a possibility of having her and Heimdall back in some way. They should make a series with them and their afterlife in Valhalla. 

Jane agreeing to stay behind when Thor asked her so that they could figure out how to save her and then her breaking that promise to save Thor was great, heart-breaking, but great. Thor being visibly upset about it, knowing she’s going to die because of her decision but also respecting it was amazing to see. She wasn’t a superhero for very long but she made sure that the limited time and power she had counted for something. And they honoured her with a statue and she was welcomed into Valhalla. I think it was great, I really enjoyed her character in this movie and I had to hold back tears several times.

I’m so happy that Taika “got rid of” the Guardians so fast, which is what I wanted. Don’t get me wrong, I like the Guardians, but I wanted Thor to be the focus in his own movie.

People clapped when Heimdall appeared.

I also want a series that just follows that theatre company! Them asking if they should make a play out of the disaster that was still happening was so funny.

I loved that we got a scene in black and white with just splashes of colour, especially since some people hated that Ragnarok was so colourful. It was really cool.

Taika really is a master of making you laugh out loud and in the next scene he rips your heart out. And it doesn’t feel cheap in any way, if you know what I mean. It feels kind of natural. 

Thor being a dad! Cooking for her, making her put on her proper shoes. I love that she drew on Mjölnir. I would love to see more of her, she was so cute. 

When they introduced Hercules in the end credit scene I was like “!! That’s fucking Roy Kent!” I look forward to seeing more of him. 

So those are the things I can remember at the top of my head. Overall I loved the movie. I could have watched it again straight after. And I know it said that Thor will be back but if he’s coming back in a solo movie no one else should be allowed to do it except Taika. Thor belongs to him now! Hell, even if it’s a team up movie, Taika should do it. 

[jeonsjiddies]

little things | jhs (m)

⏤  Pairing: single dad!Hoseok x reader ⏤  Genre: smut, fluff ⏤  Word Count: 6.1k ⏤  Warnings: very brief mentions of abortion (that didn’t happen), breast play, daddy kink, impregnation kink, cream pie, dirty talk

⏤  Summary: The best things in life are often unexpected. Like the two year old girl who ran up to you for comfort, and her devastatingly handsome father. 

Thank you to @excusemin​ and @sugaflake​ for beta reading. I love you.

Part of my Milestone Celebration Event! Check out the other fics here.

The weather was absolutely perfect. The sun was bright and shining but it wasn’t hot enough to make you sweat. The wind was gentle and rustled the leaves on the trees with a tender caress, the birds were singing, and for the first time in a while, you felt good. You had taken a walk to the nearby park, making a few laps around the walking trail before settling yourself against a tree to soak in some sun and relax. You had promised yourself you’d get out more after being holed up in your apartment alone with only your red wine and oreos to keep you company. It had been a few weeks since you’d broken up with your boyfriend of the time, and you were finally ready to become a productive citizen of society again.

It was the perfect day to do so in your opinion, everything around you seemed so tranquil. You closed your eyes and took a deep breath, allowing the warm air to soothe you. That was, until you heard a shrill shrieking and your eyes popped open seconds before a girl who couldn’t have been older than two, catapulted herself into your arms. She was screaming, crying, clinging to you for dear life, one hand pointing behind her and you looked up to see a disgruntled goose hissing at the two of you, stalking closer with a threatening posture.

You slowly stood and backed up behind the tree, holding the small girl close to you, ready to use your body to shield her own. The goose hissed a few more times, but thankfully did not advance any closer. You waited, watching quietly, and it seemed to decide you weren’t worth it before hissing in warning once more and stalking off towards its nest. You let out a breath of relief, and tried to set the little girl down but she clung to you and made it clear she wasn’t letting go, so you rubbed her back soothingly.

“Where’s your mommy and daddy?” you asked quietly.

“I don’t know.” she sniffled into your neck.

“That’s okay, I’ll help you find them.”

You carried her closer to the playground section of the park, looking around for someone who might be looking for her. Soon you heard a frantic male voice booming through the air.

“Yeona! YEONA!”

The little girl’s head popped up at the sound, her head turning towards the voice.

“Daddy?”

You looked up and followed her line of sight, your gaze landing on a hunk of a man. He was tall, well-built but not bulky, with thick, black hair and lovely tan skin. The man’s eyes locked with the child in your arms and he visibly melted in relief seeing his daughter alive and unharmed. He ran over to the two of you quickly, guiding the fluffy dog on the leash with him. He reached the two of you almost instantly, and Yeona slipped from your arms into her father’s embrace easily, snuggling up to him.

“Thank goodness you’re okay! I was so worried!” he fretted, smoothing down her hair and fretting over her, causing her to let out the cutest giggle you’d ever heard in your life.

His gaze turned to you after he’d calmed down enough to pay attention to anything but the little girl in his arms, and it was then that you noticed his perfectly straight pearly white teeth, soft lips, and eyes that shimmered like diamonds. Your breath caught in your throat as he watched you and then he began to ramble.

“Thank you so much, I am so sorry! Mickey got his leash tangled around a pole and I turned my back for two seconds and she was gone! I was so scared I thought I was going to throw up, I kept thinking about all those stories I heard about little girls getting kidnapped and sold into slavery and I think I almost passed out. Thank you so much for keeping her safe, I don’t know how I can ever repay you. She is my everything I don’t know what I’d do without her, she’s all I’ve got left and I…” he sighed, taking a deep breath and opening those shimmery eyes to meet yours once again, “thank you.”

“It’s really no problem, I get it. Kids can be a handful.” you smiled reassuringly.

“Thank you so much. For helping. For not judging. Oh! I’m Hoseok.” he extended a hand to you and you shook it gently, feeling sparks racing up your arm and down your spine but you shook them off.

“Y/N. Nice to meet you.”

You both heard Yeona’s stomach growl and Hoesok laughed.

“Time for lunch, little one?”

She nodded and pouted adorably.

“Say bye to Y/N.”

Her little face scrunched up in displeasure and she started crying, reaching out desperately for you, and Hoseok almost dropped her from the unexpected shift in her weight. Taken aback, you allowed her to jump into your arms once more, cradling her close so she didn’t fall. She buried her head in your neck and you looked at Hoseok in shock.

“I’m so sorry, Yeona come on we have to go.” he tried prying her from your frame but she only wailed in response, clutching tighter.

“NO.”

“Yeona please, Y/N must want to go home.”

“No!” she sobbed.

You rubbed her back soothingly, rocking from side to side a bit to calm her down.

“Hey, it’s okay, don’t cry. Look at me, okay?”

She pulled back slightly to look at your face and you smiled.

“There’s a pretty girl!” you smiled, smoothing down some hair that had gone awry. “How’s this? If you go get lunch with daddy, I promise we can play together at the park soon. Okay? Well, if that’s alright with you?” you looked up at Hoseok.

“Of course!” he agreed quickly.

“But… I want you to come too.” she pouted, looking up at you with  pitiful puppy dog eyes.

You looked up at Hoseok for some direction and he watched the two of you carefully.

“Would you like to join us for lunch? My treat. As a thank you.” he offered, scratching the back of his neck nervously, a shy smile gracing his lips.

“I don’t want to impose-” you began but Yeona whined loudly.

“Please!”

“I mean, if you’re sure…” you trailed off.

“Yay!” Yeona grinned, hugging you tightly then wiggling out of your grasp and taking your hand, pulling you along with her towards the car.

Hoseok laughed and followed the two of you with Mickey on his leash. Yeona insisted that you sit with her in the back so she could show you her collection of stickers. You gave the appropriate excited responses to each one, even gifting you a shimmery mermaid, pressing it into your shirt, telling you it was her favorite but she wanted you to have it.

Hoseok pulled up to a local cafe that had outdoor seating, saying he didn’t feel comfortable leaving Mickey in the car alone, a fact that warmed your heart. You helped Yeona slide onto the bench, Hoseok sitting across from the two of you. You ordered something cheap, not wanting to burden him, and made small talk while you waited for your food.

“Thank you again, so much, for keeping Yeona safe. I don’t know what I’d do if something had happened to her,” Hoseok sighed.

“No problem at all, thank you for lunch!”

Hoseok smiled, and turned to watch Yeona draw something on one of those kids menus they give out with crayons, her picture depicting the day at the park.

“So is your wife at work?” you asked, sipping on your soda, attempting to avoid the silence.

“I, uh, don’t have a wife,” he chuckled, scratching the back of his neck nervously.

“Oh I’m so sorry, I didn’t realize - your husband?”

“I’m single.” Hoseok laughed.

“Oh. So it’s just you raising Yeona?”

“Yeah, it’s been just us since the beginning. Her mom… it wasn’t a permanent thing, and when she realized she was pregnant, she wanted to…” he glanced over at Yeona, and though she was busy messing with Mickey, Hoseok still imitated the scissor motion with his hands, rather than saying the word.

Your eyes grew wide and you glanced over at Yeona.

“I mean, I believe in choices, don’t get me wrong, but I couldn’t imagine that happening to my child. I begged her to reconsider and promised I wouldn’t ask for anything if she let me keep Yeona, and here we are.”

“Wow, I don’t know what to say,” you watched his face for a reaction.

“You don’t have to say anything! I just wanted to thank you again.”

“Anyone would’ve done the same, I hope.”

“You would hope, but oftentimes I just get judgemental looks or scowls. People aren’t very kind to single parents, apparently,” he sighed, twirling the straw around in his drink, “so your kindness is appreciated.”

“Of course. I’m sorry you’ve been treated that way. I can’t imagine how hard it must be to raise a child alone. If you never need anything, you can call me? If you feel comfortable?” you offered, holding out your phone.

“Really? You wouldn’t mind?” Hoseok’s eyes widened in shock.

You shook your head with a smile, handing over your phone for him to input his number and texted him so he had yours. Hoseok looked star struck, and you wondered why someone so bright and happy could receive such backlash. You couldn’t focus on that thought for long, because Yeona jumped up excitedly, clapping and pointing to the waiter who was bringing your food.

You helped her cut hers into smaller bites and entertained her throughout the meal whilst eating yours so Hoseok could relax and enjoy his food, and you didn’t miss the appreciative smile he sent you.

Throughout the next few months, you spent more and more time with both Hoseok and Yeona. You’d meet them at the park, accompany them on little adventures, video chat with them before bed. You began hanging out at their house, spending your days nestled in the crook of their couch with Yeona snuggled up against your side while you watched Frozen 2 for the six hundredth time, or conducting a rather elegant tea party in which you’d convinced Hoseok to wear a tiara for.

You spent so much time around the pair, their home had begun to feel like a home away from home. You often found yourself crashing on the couch after playing too hard and staying too late. You searched YouTube and learned how to french braid since Yeona couldn’t stop talking about “princess hair” and Hoseok was… less than talented with her hair. You would sit behind her on her bed, braiding her hair and telling her silly stories and jokes, and began to love the little girl as your own.

Hoseok would sneak up behind you and attack the both of you with tickles or start a bubble fight. Sometimes it was hard to forget you weren’t a family, especially when strangers in public mistook you for one. You’d blush and look away, while Hoseok would gently correct them… at first. Slowly, Hoseok stopped correcting them, saying they could think whatever they wanted.

You tried not to read too much into that, but you couldn’t help the way your heart fluttered when he would just let other people think that you were together, that you were a family. Sometimes, he’d even play it up, wrapping an arm around your shoulder and pulling you in close, purposefully giving people the wrong idea with a mischievous smirk on his face.

You’d try to hide the heat on your skin, the way your heart pounded, the way your breathing seemed a little uneven when he got too close. While you’d just seen Hoseok as an attractive man and a wonderful father at first, the more time you spent with him, the more you had begun to fall for him. He was so sweet and funny and kind and cared about Yeona so much it burned your insides with joy.

The nights when you’d stay, you both had a habit of sipping on a glass of wine while you chatted, just enjoying each other’s company, and enjoying the peace and quiet. You’d never trade Yeona for anything, but sometimes she was so energetic the both of you couldn’t quite keep up, needing to unwind and relax after she’d fallen asleep.

You’d met his friends and parents at Yeona’s third birthday party, and they loved you as much as Hoseok did, a fact that caused his bright smile to glow to the point he rivaled the sun. You’d become a staple in their lives, a constant, someone they could rely on. It was crazy to you how one fateful day had changed the course of your life, and these two unsuspecting strangers had grabbed onto your heart and refused to let go. You couldn’t say you were complaining though.

Not when you were the cause of Yeona’s adorable little giggle, her tiny hands coming to cover her face while her entire frame shook from the force of her laughter. Not when you’d look over and catch Hoseok watching the two of you with a wistful, joyful expression. Not when he’d join the fun and you’d both chase her around the yard, Mickey following and barking while his tail wagged a million miles an hour.

There had even been a few nights you’d awoken on their couch to find Yeona crawling up next to you, whimpering pathetically as she mumbled “bad dream” and reached to you for comfort. You’d hold her close and stroke her hair, humming gentle lullabies to soothe her weary young mind. There were nights when you weren’t there and you’d get a FaceTime call at an unholy hour, Hoseok apologizing, saying Yeona wouldn’t go back to sleep without speaking to you.

You’d comfort her and assure her everything was alright, and you would visit her soon, and the two of you would have so much fun she wouldn’t even remember why she was sad in the first place. Hoseok would thank you, apologizing that he couldn’t convince her to leave you be, and you’d shrug him off, telling him you were available anytime. You loved her and would do anything to make her happy. What you didn’t tell him was that the same applied to him...

It was almost embarrassing how badly you wanted him, how badly you wanted to be a true part of their little family. You knew you had a special place in their hearts, that you were an honorary part of the family, but you couldn’t stop yourself from imagining what it might have been like if you were to be with Hoseok, if you were to accept Yeona as your own. Would you be able to make them happy? Or would you just be trying to fill a void meant for someone else? You’d shrug those thoughts away as soon as they came and focus on living your life as normally as you could.

That’s when your other thoughts about Hoseok would set in. To say you wanted Hoseok would be quite the understatement. Yes, you wanted to be a part of their family in the simplest ways, to be there for them and love them unconditionally, but there was also that lingering attraction. You couldn’t keep your eyes off of him some days when he laughed, when his shirt rode up and accidentally displayed the trail of hair leading down to the promised land.

When he’d display his strength by helping you move something, or when he’d wrap his arms around you just a little too tightly, allowing your bodies to press against each other. If you weren’t cooing over how cute the two of them were, you were thirsting over Hoseok and trying desperately to think innocent thoughts, lest your arousal get so potent he would notice.

Once, you’d gone to the pool with Hoseok and Yeona, thinking nothing of the invite until you’d shown up in your bikini, ready to swim. Hoseok had physically ceased moving and his gaze had slowly trailed down your body, drinking in the sight of you so scantily-clad. His gaze had your skin burning more than the hot summer sun and you squirmed under his undivided attention, unable to stop yourself from also peeking a glance at his shirtless chest. Smooth skin, abs that weren’t too defined but were definitely there, that drool-worthy v shape that disappeared into his trunks…

You’d both snapped back to reality when Yeona had whined loudly, asking you to play with her under the waterfall station. Heat had flooded your cheeks and Hoseok had looked down with a guilty expression, scratching the back of his neck with a chuckle, saying he’d find a chair to place your items at and would meet the two of you over there.

There was also the time you’d come over for movie night a little earlier than planned and Hoseok had answered the door in a towel, loosely hung low on his hips and you’d been mesmerized by the water droplets that slowly traveled down his almost naked body. You’d audibly sucked in a breath, your mouth parting just slightly, and Hoseok had apologized, then rushed off to get dressed, but you hadn’t gotten the image out of your mind since.

On Friday night, you’d just arrived home after a long day at work, flinging yourself onto the couch with your amazon package in hand, a cute JoJo bow you’d picked up for Yeona after seeing it on the app during your late night scrolling. All your targeted ads were now centered around items for young girls rather than women your own age from you spoiling the young girl so much. You smiled to yourself and just as the thought had left your mind, your phone rang.

“Y/N!” Hoseok gasped, sounding panicked.

You immediately sat up, “what’s wrong?”

“I have this event for work tonight that I absolutely can not miss and my babysitter just cancelled. I tried calling the guys, my mom, everyone! No one’s available and I hate to ask this, but do you think you could watch Yeona? I swear it’ll only take like, two hours! Tops!”

“Hobi, calm down. I’ll be there in ten, okay?”

“What did I ever do to deserve you?!” he sighed in relief.

“You ordered me pizza for tonight.”

“You got it. The usual?”

“You’re the best, I’ll see you soon.”

You hoisted yourself up from the couch and trudged out the door, making quick work of your drive to Hoseok’s place. The door swung open before you could even knock, and Yeona flung herself into you, wrapping her arms around your legs, then reaching up for you to hold her. You leaned down and picked her up, snuggling her close to you as she wrapped her arms around your neck.

“Daddy said you’re going to play with me! By ourselves!” she bounced excitedly in your arms.

“It’s true! Are you excited?”

“Yes!”

You giggled and placed her on the ground, turning to Hoseok who was slipping his jacket on. He leaned in to give you a tight, thankful hug that allowed you to smell his intoxicating aftershave. You swooned silently to yourself, hugging him back.

“Thank you so much, Y/N! The pizzas on the way, I already put the tip in. I will be back by 8 at the latest!”

“Take your time, I love hanging out with Yeona.” you reassured him.

He shot you an appreciative smile before leaning down and kissing Yeona on the cheek, then absentmindedly doing the same to you before rushing out the door. You stood frozen in place, staring at the closed door Hoseok had just exited from, shell shocked until Yeona tugged at your tights, forcing you to avert your attention to her and not your racing heart.

“Y/N, come play.”

“Oh! Right. I got you a present,” you dug into your purse and pulled out the shimmery bow, clipping it into her hair.

“Jojo!” she shrieked excitedly.

You giggled and followed along as she tugged you towards the mirror, surveying her new bow and twirling around like the diva she was.

“I look like a princess!” she said in awe, her eyes shining.

“You are a princess!”

Her chubby little cheeks tinged pink with glee and she pulled you into her room, deciding she wanted to play dress-up with her princess dresses and find the one that matched the bow the most. Mickey lay on her bed, looking up at you with curiosity and wagging his tail. You sat beside him and gently stroked his head, causing him to nuzzle into your touch.

You watched with amusement as Yeona tore apart her closet to find the best dress to go with her new bow, absentmindedly picking up the used dresses and hanging them back up for her. If she drug out her toys though, you’d make her pick those up. But she was just having so much fun you didn’t want to interrupt, and the clutter bothered you so you picked it up in between your choruses of “ooh I like that one” and “you look so pretty!”

The doorbell rang, causing Mickey to let out a protective bark and you soothed his fur down before standing to open the door. The man on the other side greeted you warmly, asking you to sign the receipt for the pizza, which you did, before wishing him a good night. You drooled a bit, smelling your favorite toppings that Hoseok had remembered to order.

“Yeona! Dinners here!” you called, grabbing two plates and setting the table.

Yeona came skipping into the kitchen, and you helped her climb into the booster seat on her favorite chair before placing a bib on her so she didn’t ruin her dress. You cut the pizza slice into more manageable pieces for Yeona to eat before sliding into your own chair, biting into the heavenly food. You groaned happily and Yeona giggled, eating hers with her little cartoon character utensils.

Putting the leftovers in the fridge to ensure Hoseok had a snack later, knowing he didn’t eat before rushing off to work, you continued to play with Yeona for about an hour or two before she started yawning and you checked the clock, realizing it was almost bedtime. You helped her clean up the toys and mess you’d both made before pulling out some pajamas for her and assisting her with brushing her teeth.

You tucked her into bed and she pulled on your sleeve, looking up at you with the sweetest puppy eyes you’d ever seen.

“Are you going to read me a story like daddy does?”

“I can! What do you want to read?”

“If you give a mouse a cookie!”

You grinned and grabbed the book off the shelf, leaning against the headboard next to Yeona and began reading.

“If a hungry little mouse shows up on your doorstep, you might want to give him a cookie. And if you give him a cookie, he'll ask for a glass of milk. He'll want to look in a mirror to make sure he doesn't have a milk mustache, and then he'll ask for a pair of scissors to give himself a trim…”

About halfway through the book, Yeona’s eyes started drifting closed, but her little hand reached out to hold onto your free one, and you looked down at her, setting the book down in your lap.

“I love you, Y/N,” Yeona mumbled, snuggling closer to the warmth of your body.

“I love you too, sweet girl,” you cooed, smoothing her hair out of her face with a tender touch.

“Wish you were my mommy.” she sighed, barely awake.

You didn’t move, didn’t breathe. You didn’t know how to respond, but thankfully she didn’t seem to be looking for one, her eyelids fluttering shut before you heard her soft, even breathing.

“Baby girl, I would never leave you behind if I were,” you whispered, knowing she couldn’t hear as you continued to stroke her hair, “I would take care of you, my love. I wish I was your mommy too.”

You watched her sleep for a little while longer, her precious face looking so peaceful and pure. You wondered how anyone could ever walk away from such a beautiful little girl. Stroking her hair one last time, you stood and placed the book back on the shelf, exiting the room with Mickey on your heels and slowly shutting the door.

You let him outside to use the bathroom and gave him a treat before settling into the couch with him in your lap, petting him absentmindedly as your thoughts raced with the events of the night. How Yeona had been so cute dressing up, had been so entertaining with the little tea party you’d both held, how she’d told you she wished you were her mom… How Hoseok had kissed your cheek, clearly not thinking about it, and doing it out of habit, but how it had sent your heart lurching out of your chest. Just as the thought of Hoseok had crossed your mind, the door opened and Hoseok rushed inside, quietly but profusely apologizing for being late.

“I am so sorry, the function ran over and I was on the cleanup crew so I couldn’t leave.” Hobi whisper-shouted.

“It’s fine, I had fun, I barely realized what time it was. Yeona’s asleep.”

“Thank you, thank you, thank you.” Hoseok gushed, reaching into his pocket to pull out his wallet and hold out some bills for you to take.

You looked up at him with one eyebrow arched, a sassy look on your face, and that had him putting the money away.

“Are you sure? I can pay you, I know you probably had other plans, it is Friday night after all.”

“Hobi, there is nowhere I would rather be, no matter what day of the week it is.” you smiled.

“You’re a god-send.” he groaned.

“It’s late, I should get going.” you smiled, seeing how exhausted he was and wanting to get out of his hair.

“Nooo, it’s too late for you to drive home alone. What if you fall asleep at the wheel? You should just stay. You can take my room, I’ll sleep on the couch.”

“I’m not going to kick you out of your room. I can take the couch.”

“Are you thirsty? Want some wine?” he offered, walking backwards towards the kitchen.

“Sure.”

Hoseok grabbed two glasses of wine and the bottle, setting the objects on the coffee table in front of you and easing himself into the seat beside you, and you both sipped on the dark red liquid as you talked.

“I really am so thankful for your help tonight, all your help with Yeona. It’s not easy doing everything on my own. I know I have my parents and the guys, but sometimes I wonder if I’m giving her the best life or if I’m holding her back from having a happy family,” he sighed.

“Hobi, that little girl adores you, there is no one she’d rather have as her father.”

“I know, but is that what’s best for her? Doesn’t she need a mom?”

“She needs people who love her and support her, and she has that,” you comfort, rubbing his back soothingly, “she has you, the guys, her grandparents, me…”

“You’re right, thank you. I just get insecure sometimes, thinking she deserves better than… well, me.”

“Hobi, you’re an amazing dad! You’re so good with her, you’re raising her so well. She’s sweet and smart and well-behaved. She is so loved and it shows, because she displays love. You are a wonderful father, and you are more than enough.”

“Thank you, really. You always know just what to say. I’m so glad I met you, you’ve been so good to Yeona and I.” he smiled.

“I’m glad I met you too, you two are so important to me! I couldn’t imagine a life without you both in it.”

“...really?”

“Of course!” you immediately replied with conviction, holding onto Hoseok’s hand without realizing it.

Hands still in yours, Hoseok’s gaze lifted to meet your own, and you didn’t shy away like you’d immediately wanted to, wanting to both comfort him, and also look into his beautiful eyes for a moment more. You couldn’t believe Hoseok was insecure about his abilities to raise Yeona, he was the best father you’d ever seen,  one of the million things you’d come to love about him. His eyes flickered from yours to your lips momentarily, and he slowly leaned closer to your now-shivering frame.

“Tell me to stop, and I will. Tell me you don’t want this, and I’ll back off,” he whispered as he closed the gap between your lips.

You didn’t say anything, instead opting to close the remaining distance yourself, pressing your lips to his in a sweet, chaste kiss. Hobi scooted closer to you, wrapping his arms around your waist and bringing you against his body, your arms coming up to wrap around his neck. The kiss was sweet and tentative at first but quickly lit a fire inside your core, and somehow, you found yourself straddling his lap, grinding your core down on his semi-hard erection.

“Fuck, Y/N…” he groaned, moving his kisses down to your neck, muttering into your skin, “I’ve wanted this for so long.”

“Me too.” you admitted through breathless exhales, working your hips against his while he worked his lips against your skin.

You slipped your fingers under his shirt, feeling his stomach up to his nipples, grazing your nails gently across the buds, causing his body to jerk towards you. You smirked to yourself, lifting the shirt which he aided you in removing. Your mouth watered at the sight of his smooth, tan skin. You gently nudged him backwards until his head rested on the arm of the couch, and kissed your way down his torso until you reached the hem of his jeans.

Hoseok’s breath hitched as you undid his belt, looking up at him to make sure it was okay and he grinned at you, running his hand through your hair to gather it into a makeshift ponytail. You took that as an okay and slid his jeans and boxers down just enough to reveal his throbbing length, precum, leaking from the tip. You licked along the slit, gathering the precum on your tongue and swallowing, making a pleased noise in the back of your throat.

Hoseok shivered, biting down on his lip and watching you lick a bold stripe along the underside, your hand reaching to cup his balls while you sunk down on his length, hollowing your cheeks around his throbbing member. Hoseok gripped your hair a little tighter in an attempt not to buck up into your mouth. You took him as deep as you could, letting the tip hit the back of your throat as you sucked him for dear life.

“Fuck, I’m not gonna last long if you keep doing that,” he moaned helplessly, his grip on your hair loosening.

In response, you simply bobbed your head up and down faster, sucking harder on his length, using every trick you had to get him to his orgasm. Hoseok groaned, probably a little too loudly, before tapping the side of your cheek to warn you, but you didn’t pull away. Hoseok groaned, his back arching off the couch as he spilled his seed down your throat and you swallowed it all, licking your lips once you’d pulled off of his softening cock.

“Holy shit,” he breathed.

You giggled and leaned up to peck his lips, which he returned with fervor, licking along your bottom lip and deepening the kiss, pulling you closer , letting your hips settle atop his while his mouth worked against your own.

“I really want to be inside you,” he groaned.

“Fuck me, Hobi,” you pleaded, grinding yourself on his length, and you felt it stir to life once more.

“Need to prep you.”

“No, I’m so fucking wet for you, I’m ready,” you groaned, lifting yourself off of him to shed your panties from under your skirt, bunching it up around your hips and lining your entrance with his now-erect penis.

“Are you sure?”

You nodded, sinking down on his member and groaning at the way he stretched your walls, the slight burn being aided by the amount of arousal that had pooled in your cunt, allowing his length to slip into your inviting heat with minimal resistance. Hoseok bit down on his arm, holding in a moan at the feeling of your wet cavern wrapped around his cock so perfectly.

Hoseok’s hands came to rest on your hips, guiding your pace as you bounced on his cock, riding him with enthusiasm, your walls clenching around him each time the tip of his cock kissed that special spot inside you. Hoseok lifted his hips to meet yours, keeping time with your thrusts and you bit down on your lip to hold in a moan.

“Fuck, you feel even better than I imagined.”

“You thought about this?” you wondered, swiveling your hips down on him.

“Every night since I met you,” he admitted.

“Fuck, Hobi. Me too. Want you so bad,” you whimpered.

“Yeah? You want Daddy to fill you up? Want me to fill this pretty pussy with my seed? Fuck a baby into you?” he growled and you clenched at the words.

“Yes, fuck.”

“Mmm, you like that? Wanna be filled with Daddy’s cum? Wanna see it drip out of that tight little pussy.” he groaned, speeding up his thrusts.

“Hobi, yes,” you whined, his dirty words spurring you closer to your release, “close.”

“Me too, baby. Come on, cum for me,” he urged, leaning up to bring one of your nipples in his mouth.

Your orgasm crashed over you the moment his tongue ran over the sensitive bud. You held your breath to keep from crying out as Hoseok worked you through your high, reaching his before you had finished yours, the feeling of his warm seed filling your battered hole making your orgasm even more intense.

Coming down from your highs, you lifted your hips to allow his length to slip out of you, watching as his cum dripped out of your sex, running down your leg and his. Hoseok groaned at the sight, pulling you into his chest. You snuggled up to him for a moment before you both got up to clean up, him assisting you by gently running a damp rag along your folds and you running it along his leg to clean up the mess you’d both made.

You pulled your clothes back on and Hoseok grabbed your hand, leading you to his bedroom and offering you a t-shirt to sleep in. You weren’t sure he would want you to stay, but you were thankful he did. And not on the couch. After changing into Hobi’s clothes and cuddling up to him, his arm wrapped around your middle, you felt at ease. Hobi was the first to break the silence.

“Please tell me this means you’ll be mine,” he whispered against the skin of your neck while placing little kisses along the skin there.

“I’ll be yours if you’ll be mine,” you answered, leaning down to capture his lips with yours.

One year later 

Pushing the key in the lock of your brand new house, you opened the door and looked around the foyer, and heard little footsteps running through the hall, a sweet giggle echoing.

“Mommy! You’re home!” Yeona grinned, launching herself into your arms, and you spun her around, holding her close to your chest.

“I’m home, baby girl. How was your day?”

“It was good! I missed you though, you and my baby sister!” she grinned, her tiny, chubby hand caressing your plump belly.

“We missed you too, pumpkin. Where’s Daddy?”

“He’s in his office, he’s been boring today, but he did take a break to play with me. He doesn’t play dress up like you do, you’re more fun,” she whined, clutching at your neck.

“Hmmm, how about we play a little before dinner then?”

She squealed excitedly, wiggling out of your grasp and running to her room. You followed behind her, leaning up against Hoseok’s office door on the way.

“Hey, handsome.”

Hoseok looked up, immediately standing and walking up to you, his hand gently caressing your baby bump while he pressed his lips to yours.

“Welcome home, baby. And baby,” he grinned.

You rolled your eyes with a smile on your face, pecking his cheek.

“Yeona says you’re boring and don’t play dress up the right way,” you smirked, mocking him.

Hoseok groaned, throwing his arm over his eyes dramatically before his smile reached his eyes as he softly said, “Well, it’s a good thing we have you.”

[meetmymouth]

AUBADE ; HARRY STYLES

WORD COUNT: 12k

warnings: smut, smoking, alcohol consumption.

thank you @harryandhockey​ and @burberryharold​ for beta-ing this baby, you guys are the sweetest angels! 

When the doorbell goes off for the third time that night, she groans and tosses the lipstick on her bed, then makes her way towards the door. Through the stained glass, she sees a tall figure and rolls her eyes.

“Look, this is the third time- oh. It’s you.”

The blonde raises her eyebrows, “Who were you expecting? Also wow, I feel so welcome, thank you.”

“Sorry,” the door closes behind Charlotte, and they walk inside.

Once in the tiny kitchen, kettle already on, she takes time to coat her eyelashes with mascara.

“Who did you think I was, that was quite the welcome.”

“Couple of girls kept knocking on the door. Something about a survey. I’ve no idea. Hey, can you help me put this on?” She takes a necklace out of her jean pocket and hands it over.

It’s Thursday, which means happy hour at their local pub and after that, they’d take N31 towards Camden to listen to a friend of Charlotte’s, an upcoming indie artist. She usually didn’t like going out on weekdays since she worked 8 to 4 and she would need to wake up at 6AM sharp to get ready and leave her flat for her Friday shift. But ever since Charlotte started working for the touring musician Harry Styles, they saw each other twice- once when they toured England and the second one being right before Charlotte left for tour. Being close friends since school, it was safe to say that she felt her absence and missed her friend dearly but were also so proud of her for everything she’d achieved.

So when Charlotte came home during their break, she wanted to spend as much time as possible with her friend and if it meant spending her Friday shift hungover while cleaning up animal urine and puke from all kinds of animals, then so be it.

“There,” Charlotte pats her on the neck after she clasps the necklace and she turns around, hand reaching to turn the kettle off.

“Ta. When are we leaving? And do you think I should go for my Adidas or the boots?” She points at the heeled boots, half white half black by the kitchen entrance and Charlotte follows her gaze as she sips the hot beverage.

She looks at the boots, then her, then the boots again, “The boots for fuckin’ sure. They’re sick- where’d you get them?”

“Depop,” She lets out a chuckle, “Think they’re Topshop, ‘m not sure. Should we leave? Y’know I walk dead slow and now that I’m wearin’ the boots…”

“You really do...go get your shit, I’ll wash this.”

They’re gathered around a round table, the green paint of the wooden table beginning to chip, and everyone’s got drinks of their own, G&T being the most popular choice. There are only five of them, Charlotte, her, Phoebe and her girlfriend Jamie, and they’re chatting about anything and everything until Charlotte turns to her, straw between her red lips.

“So-”

“Oh dear, what have you done,” she cuts her off and earns a glare from her, and from the corner of her eye, she sees Phoebe and Jamie cross their arms as if they’re getting ready for their usual bickering.

“Fuck you,” Charlotte sighs, “I didn’t do anything. I just invited some more people to Julien’s show and wanted to...kinda ask if that’s alright with you”

“Oh,” she looks around the table, finding the other girls looking at their phones and she turns to Charlotte, “It’s fine. Who are they?”

Phoebe snorts at that and her eyebrows raise in question. She gives Phoebe a look, but Charlotte’s quicker as she throws a damp tissue at the blonde and Jamie laughs when it lands back on Charlotte’s lap. “You know Sarah from the band?”

“Oh, yeah!”

She remembers meeting Sarah at Charlotte’s new flat after she moved to London, the brunette bringing a cute snake plant and a weird- but cute tea set as a housewarming gift and they got on well. They talked about plants, Sarah giving her tips on how to keep certain plants alive, and she asked her lots of questions about her experience being a woman, especially a drummer in the music industry. Sarah was very soft spoken; she spoke as if she was talking to a baby, but she always made sure to maintain eye contact when she was having a conversation with you, listening and nodding when appropriate so that you felt special and...understood. She was lovely, which was why she found it weird how Charlotte was acting awkward about her joining them tonight.

“And her boyfriend, Mitch, of course,” Charlotte adds and she nods, motioning for her to keep going. “And Harry.”

“Harry Styles?”

“Oh boy,” Jamie whistles.

“Obviously,” Charlotte sucks on her straw, slurping her drink, “Yeah, him,” she repeats, this time softer.

“I...why?” She chooses to ask, surprised as she’d like to think Harry Styles as this unreachable, ever-so-busy person who wouldn’t be interested in a night out like this. She turns to Phoebe, and then Jamie, and they respond with a shrug as Phoebe goes back to cuddling into Jamie’s side.

“What do you mean why?” Charlotte places her drink on the table, “It would be rude not to since I asked Sarah and Mitch.”

“Well, I just mean, isn’t he busy?”

Jamie whistles again and sings her name, “You got a crush, babes?”

“Nonsense, never even met the guy- which,” she looks around the table, “-is one of the reasons why I was confused. Anyway, it doesn't matter,” she shrugs and turns to Charlotte, “I’m not bothered, Lotts, it’s totally fine.”

“Y’sure?”

She gives her a nod, “I just find him intimidating and don’t think he’d be into indie, that’s all.”

It was true. Despite having not met Mr. Harry Styles, deep down she knew he’d be intimidating because he was so good looking and well, just like most people, she loved One Direction. She was a big fan, she even got told off by her stepmother once when she was younger because apparently the tape she used to hang her One Direction posters was ruining the walls. She often referred to them as twinks, and she didn’t even know what it meant until she was older. She remembers how she got made fun of at sixth form because one of the girls found her old Tumblr and told everyone about it. Harry’s never been her favourite though. Not because she didn’t find him attractive, not at all. It was because he was too attractive and was everyone’s favourite so whenever asked, she’d shrug and tell people how she found Louis funny, and then Zayn because ’he’s the hottest’.

Long story short, despite her friendship with Charlotte, she’d never met Harry, never had the opportunity to attend one of his shows because she was either too busy or they were playing in a different country and she simply couldn’t afford it. So tonight would be the first time they’d get to be in the same place and to say that she was nervous would be an understatement. And her, she always thought she was awkward. Way too awkward for social gatherings but she liked going out regardless, drinking cheap alcohol and dancing to shitty songs in an equally shitty pub. She loved being a student. Loved the freedom the title had given her. What’s your occupation, she’d get asked from time to time. Student, she’d say without hesitating. She was a student. She didn’t have to be anything else for three years. Sure, she was also working part time at an animal shelter but for the most part, she loved being a student. That’s how she met Phoebe, and then Jamie. In a way, she was their matchmaker.

She remembers meeting Phoebe last year when they had a class together. She was the first person to smile at her in the overcrowded lecture theatre and she remembers thinking how nice Phoebe’s green fringe looked. Meeting Jamie though, was funny. Phoebe usually got weird when they joked about it since she met Jamie before Phoebe did on Tinder, even went on a date with her, and then right before she was about to ghost her, she thought of how similar Phoebe and Jamie were. It was then that she made Phoebe go on a date with Jamie, and after a month of pining, they got together. Even though they were similar, she always thought that they actually completed each other, Jamie being the logical one and Phoebe encouraging Jamie to let loose from time to time and live in the moment.

Charlotte reaches and boops her nose, “He’s a musician, he loves all kinds of music. He won’t eat you, babe. He’s nice, I promise.”

Phoebe knocks on the wood, getting everyone’s attention, “Can we get a picture with him? An autograph?”

She feels a throbbing pain in her feet, toes in particular once they’re in and they wait for Phoebe and Jamie to buy their drinks, knowing she’d wake up with blisters in the morning. Charlotte takes out her phone and presumably texts the others, letting them know they were already here. She felt nervous. Nervous because she always thought she was rubbish when it came to meeting new people; they either thought she was too intimidating or rude but in reality, it was only because she always felt anxious meeting new people and would rather stay quiet than talking nonsense.

She takes time to analyse her outfit, a pair of black mom jeans and her boots, oh the boots who were currently grilling her feet. Then she tries to adjust her lace bodysuit, all of a sudden feeling super self conscious about the ”revealing” outfit. She adjusts the top, hoping her tits weren’t out before, and sighs when she touches the oversized blazer, rolling up the sleeves a bit more since it was beginning to get warm, too warm for her liking inside. Considering how she often felt self conscious about her arms, she felt more comfortable with the blazer over the sexy bodysuit.

“So,” she starts, eyes studying the crowded bar before her gaze stops at Charlotte, “Are they here?”

Charlotte looks up from her phone and nods, leaning her head on her shoulder. She feels her arm going around her waist and smiles, nudging her head with hers and she looks up, giving her a smile of her own. “What’s up, blondie?” she asks, hand coming up to ruffle Charlotte’s fringe.

She sighs, “Just tired, to be honest. I’m glad I wore trainers.”

“At least one of us is happy about their shoe choice.”

They watch as Phoebe and Jamie walk towards them, the brunette handing her a tall glass as Phoebe hands Charlotte her own drink. “When’s she on?”

Everyone turns to Charlotte, “Half an hour, maybe?”

“When are your friends coming? It’s getting quite...stuffy in here,” Jamie looks around and Phoebe nods, hands going around Jamie’s waist to pull the brunette into her.

“I texted Sarah and she said Harry was parking the car- oh, I see Mitch.”

They all look around, and she spots the tall guy with long hair, walking towards them with Sarah and Harry behind. She gulps and tries to look away, praying that no one takes notice of her sweaty forehead and shaky hands.

As the trio walk towards them, she takes a moment to examine Harry, and his outfit. Even in the dimly lit bar, she’s almost sure the high waisted trousers he has on are navy, and he’s got a tan...or a beige shirt tucked in them, chest on full display and she notices a cross necklace, looking as if it was made for his pretty neck. She clears her throat as quietly as she can and looks down but not before she takes a peek at his shoes, and she almost snorts at the choice of red boots he’s got on, noticing how everyone had trainers on while the two of them had what looked like very uncomfortable boots on.

To be honest, she thinks, he looks pretty good. She looks around them, noticing how most guys had jeans and ugly trainers on whereas Harry looked like he made quite the effort with his outfit but she also knows that even if he turned up in jeans and ugly trainers, he would still look amazing. Damn Harry Styles. Was she blushing?

The three of them are in their space now, close enough so she can make out Sarah’s overpowering perfume, and she clears her throat once again when Charlotte embraces Sarah first, then Mitch. Before she can watch her hug Harry, Sarah’s in front of her.

“Hi,” she smiles, going in for a hug, “It’s so nice to see you again. It’s been a while,” she says and her voice comes out muffled since they’re still hugging and she hopes her hair smells decent because Sarah’s face is pressed against her neck and hair.

“It’s nice to see you too! How have you been?”

“‘Been alright, I suppose!” She beams at her and turns to the man with long hair, “This is Mitch.”

As Sarah introduces everyone with Mitch, she feels Harry’s eyes on her, though she can’t turn her head and meet his gaze because that’d be rude seeing how Mitch is about to reach and give her a one armed hug. Alright then, she thinks, they’re a hugger. Then, it’s Harry’s turn. She looks at him, seeing how his eyes are focused on Phoebe and Jamie as he gives them both a warm smile before Charlotte starts talking again, introducing everyone to Phoebe and Jamie, then everyone turns to her, and she feels her face heat up seeing how everyone’s attention is on her now. She knows it’s her turn.

Harry takes a step forward and her earlier thoughts are confirmed when she can finally make out the colour of his trousers. “Hey, ‘m Harry,” he gives her a smile without waiting for Charlotte to speak, “Nice meeting you,” he comes closer and wraps an arm around her, engulfing her in a hug but it’s definitely different from Mitch or Sarah’s hug. It’s tight, much warmer and he’s got both arms around her, palms flat against her back as he rubs her back.

And of course she responds with the same warmness and hugs him back, “Hiya,” she introduces herself, and once they pull apart, he repeats her name and it sounds like poetry, something so personal and...erotic. But maybe, she thinks, maybe it’s just his deep voice making her feel that way.

Despite the moment they shared, if she could call it that, felt like hours, it was merely a minute. And it wasn’t like in the films where they hug, everything around them slowing down as the people watch in awe. No, not at all. When she looks around, she sees that everyone’s been already mingling, Phoebe and Jamie smiling at each other while they sipped their drinks, and Mitch is nowhere to be seen, possibly at the bar getting drinks.

Harry turns to Charlotte with a grin, “So is she any good, should we replace you with her?” He says, nudging her with his hip.

That sort of makes her smile, seeing Harry so carefree and friendly with the people who are essentially working for him. Even though she doesn’t know Harry Styles like they do, like Charlotte does, she knows he considers these people to be his friends and colleagues rather than his employees. It’s also fun seeing him this friendly with her best friend, and she feels proud, as she always does, knowing Charlotte has made herself great friends and that she clearly enjoys working with these people.

Charlotte nudges him back, “She’s great, I wouldn’t mind being replaced by her. Oh, there she is,” she points at the stage, and everyone turns to look at the pink-haired girl on the tiny stage with a sleek looking acoustic guitar on her side. As the others start talking about Julien, she finally takes the opportunity to look at Harry. Once their eyes meet, he gives her a smile, dimples on full display, and she swears she could see him blush when he looks down after she beamed at him. Even if he did blush though, he recovers quickly when he’s offered a drink and he mutters a thank you to Mitch, then lifts the slice of lime off the rim of his glass and sucks it into his mouth and she deems it as a good time to look away.

And she does, when she feels Sarah close, and she turns to her, Sarah welcoming her with a smile, “How’s uni? It’s your last year, right?”

“Oh, yeah,” she clears her throat, “It’s alright. Exhausting, but alright.”

“You’re working too, right?”

“Yeah, I work at an animal shelter.”

“It must be exhausting.”

“It is,” she gives her a nod, “I work three days a week and I also have classes so I only have Sundays off. I’ll probably leave and focus on uni after Christmas break though, I have my dissertation next semester.”

“Oh, cool! I miss being a student,” she purses her lips and turns to Harry, who had been listening to their conversation, his pretty fingers, most of them adorned with equally pretty rings, wrapped around the tall glass, “You probably can’t relate, H, can ya?”

He rolls her eyes but laughs regardless, “Piss off.”

Despite the chatter around them, it’s not ridiculously loud so they can carry a conversation without having to shout. They fall into an easy conversation, everyone joining in, and all of a sudden a pink neon light falls over them and they all turn to the stage. Julien starts singing, and all the chatter around them dies down, some people already starting to sing the words back at her.

She looks away from the stage for a minute and catches Harry’s gaze from across the room. They’re close enough for her to make out a few droplets of sweat on Harry’s forehead, and their eyes meet as he gives her a smile, eyes sparkling with mischief, then brings the glass up to his mouth. She watches as his top lip rests on the rim before he lifts it to his mouth and when she looks up, she sees him still looking at, gaze unwavering and mouth curled upwards in a sly smirk. She was caught. She was caught and he looked like he was loving and devouring every second of it.

Julien takes a break, promising to come back with a brand new song from her upcoming EP, and there’s a group of people making their way towards the exit, presumably to have a smoke and get some fresh air.

“Where’s she gone?” Charlotte huffs, eyes searching the room for the pink haired girl.

“She’s over there,” Phoebe points at Julien and they all turn to where she’s pointing at, spotting Julien near the bar with a drink in hand.

“Is she flirting?”

“She’s got groupies already?” she says after she takes her eyes off of Harry and everyone laughs.

Charlotte comes closer and nudges her shoulder against her, “You’d know, wouldn’t you?” “Be quiet,” she nudges back, and their group falls back into their conversation except Harry, who keeps staring at her and she gulps, hands reaching to feel her blazer pockets.

“Right,” she mutters, “It’s time to poison myself. I’m going out for a fag,” once she feels the bulge in her pocket, she turns to Charlotte, “Send me a text when she’s back on, yeah?”

“I’ll come with.”

She looks up at Harry, surprised, but nods, waiting for him to follow her outside. Even though she tries her best not to make eye contact with anyone as they leave, she’s aware of them watching them, everyone in their group equally surprised, but they keep walking, Harry following quietly behind. Once they pass the smelly bodies, they’re finally outside, the wind licking her face once she steps out and she tries to hug herself closer, seeing how the thin blazer’s not doing a good job at keeping her warm.

Harry wishes he’d brought a coat.

They’re quiet as he follows her to a quiet corner, only a few people turning their heads their way, presumably recognising him, and they stop near a brick wall and she takes her tobacco out of her left pocket. She looks up, catching him staring at her ring-clad fingers wrapped around the dark green packet, and she clears her throat, making him look up at her. They share a smile, both feeling at ease with the comfortable silence between them. She spots a wooden bench near and sits down, hands already working the packet open. When she starts tearing the tobacco apart, Harry can’t help but note how quickly she’s working it between her fingers, and he’s almost certain she’s been doing this for years.

“Want one?” She asks and he saunters forward, coming to stand in front of her with hands in his pockets.

He shrugs and she takes that as a yes, fingers pausing their work on the tobacco to take out something that resembles a cigarette and it’s only when she pushes it from the bottom that Harry realises they’re filters. Placing one between her lips, her fingers dip into her pocket once again to retrieve some papers and Harry finds himself unable to look away from her lips and how pretty they look with something between them.

He looks down at her lap, where the packet of tobacco is, seeing her fingers work swiftly as she fills the thin paper, and despite knowing better not to glamorise something as horrible and disgusting as smoking, he takes his time to admire the way she pushes down the tobacco with her index finger, presumably trying to fit and secure everything inside the paper. Taking the filter from between her lips, she places it inside the paper, at the very end, and her fingers start rolling.

Oh fuck, he thinks, knowing what’s about to come. Unable to look away, he watches as she brings it up to her mouth and licks a long stripe along the paper, and despite the lack of lighting around them, his eyes make out her pink tongue moving along the paper and it doesn’t come as a surprise when he feels a sudden twitch in his trousers at the unholy image before his eyes.

“There,” she hands him the rolled up cigarette, “Hope you don’t mind that I licked?”

He wants to laugh because of course he doesn’t mind. In fact, he quite enjoyed it, according to the knot in his stomach and his twitching cock in his underwear. He enjoyed it so much that he now couldn’t stop imagining her mouth doing other things, preferably dirty things with, or to him.

“Nah, it’s all good, thanks.”

“No probs. Didn’t take you as the smoking type,” she lets it slip out.

“I...don’t smoke, really. Only sometimes. When I’m drinking. Which…” He looks at the cigarette between her fingers, “...isn’t that often.”

She notices the nervousness that tinges his words, and it makes her feel better knowing he’s also as awkward as her. “Fair,” she sends him a smile and repeats all the steps on her own rollie, putting it between her lips just like Harry, and she takes her lighter out of the same pocket. She lights her own first and reaches to light his, and he sort of bends over until his cigarette reaches the lighter. They both take a hefty drag of their cigarettes and she blows the smoke out first, Harry watching her pursed lips as he lets out his own next, both of their cigarette smoke swirling in the air and joining in together.

He takes it out of his mouth and lets his arm dangle on his side, cigarette between his fingers, and watches as she takes another drag before fumbling with the packet on her lap, putting everything back in her pocket haphazardly.

“Do you go to uni in London, or?”

“Westminster, yeah,” she takes another drag and notices how Harry hasn’t taken another one of his since.

“Nice,” he says and a grin stretches over his face, “Charlotte talks about you a lot.”

“She does?”

“Yeah, all the time. If I didn’t know about her boyfriend I’d say she was in love with you,” he laughs and gestured to the lighter in her hand and she lets him take the lighter from her hand, watching as the flame lick at the cigarette between Harry’s lip and he takes a long drag. “I mean, we...the band feel like we already know you. It’s sweet, how much she cares about you.”

“Well, I’m pretty hard not to love, you know.”

He blows out the smoke, a chuckle escaping his mouth, “That right?”

“Yeah, I’m fucking great.”

“Well, I-”

He gets interrupted by her phone going off and a pout forms on his face. She huffs, looking around, then throws the cigarette on the ground despite the sign and he does the same, not feeling bad in the slightest. “We going in?” He asks, like a lost puppy waiting for his owner’s command.

“I guess. Is it bad that I don’t want to? Like...does that make me a bad friend?”

“Nah. I...I kinda wanted to stay here too. I was enjoying our conversation.”

She sends him a grin, eyes mischievous, and stops walking, “You telling me you weren’t bored to death by my dry ass conversation?”

“Dry? You opened up and talked about your narcissistic behaviours, that’s not boring, darling,” he smirks and she rolls her eyes, hand reaching to slap his chest and it feels easy, like they’ve known each other for years. “Alright, alright, ’m just messing with you.”

She starts walking again, a few steps ahead of him, and he follows, passing three girls with phones up to their faces.

It’s easy, he thinks, it’s easy with her.

People in the bar begin to leave one by one, and it’s only their small group and a few others left, some of them still sipping their drinks and the others talking and laughing. Some even come up to Julien, who’s sipping her water from a reusable water bottle as Charlotte keeps snapping pictures of her, and they all congratulate her, telling her how excited they are about the EP. She’s all smiles, fringe sticking to her forehead due to sweat, and her long arms are equally sweaty, dressed in a tight black dress with striped knee high socks adorning her long legs, and a pair of platform Mary Janes.

“So,” Harry says, folding his arms across his chest, “Do you have any plans for October?”

Mitch snorts across him and Julien tilts her head, puzzled, “Erm...I’ve no idea, to be honest. It’s months away and God knows I’m shite at thinking ahead. That’s why I’m friends with this lot,” she gestures to their tiny group, causing Charlotte to snort and Julien continues, turning her attention to her who’s playing with the hem of her blazer,  “This one though...”

“Oh, fuck off.”

“Oi, what’s crawled up your bum, eh?” Julien turns to Harry again, catching how his gaze flickered over her body, then her face instead of looking at Julien and she finds herself smirking at the tension between the two.

“We’re thinking of putting a show together for Halloween. I have a bunch of new and upcoming artists in my mind that I’d love to see perform that night. Would you be interested?” Harry’s attention is back on Julien and he watches as the girl gasps, eyes widening in excitement.

“Shut the fuck up!” She yells, almost dropping her water bottle and they all laugh, Charlotte reaching to flip her on the forehead and she slaps her freshly-manicured hand away, “You’re not taking the piss, are you?”

Harry laughs, “Am definitely not. I love your vibe. That’s actually one of the reasons why I asked Charlotte if I could come tonight,” he says as he runs his fingers through his hair, the strands gliding easily between his long fingers.

“Yeah,” Charlotte smiles at Julien, “He’s on a hunt. He thinks he’s one of those talent agents. Just say yes, Jules, it’ll be fun.”

“Holy fuck. Yes. Fuck, yes. Of fucking course, yes!”

They all laugh when she lunges herself at Harry, arms wrapping around his neck, “Thank you, thank you, thank you, fuck I could literally kiss you right now but I won’t, I’ve been watching you both undress each other with your eyes all night,” arms still around Harry’s neck, Julien turns her head towards her, whom Harry’s been looking at all night, and gives her a wink before breaking their hug. “So, do I have to do anything? What do I have to do? Fuck, I’m so bad at this-”

“Hey,” Harry interrupts, “It’s fine. Relax. Are you signed with anyone? Have a manager?”

“Oh, yeah, I’m with Gleam, my manager, Alana, she’s sick that’s why she wasn't here tonight.”

“Okay, that’s fine. Just give me your phone number and your manager’s contact details and we’ll sort everything out. Hey- relax, it’s gonna be fun!” He reaches and gives her shoulder a squeeze.

“I called an Uber,” Sarah says after her phone goes off, “And it looks like…” she taps on the screen a few times, “Hassan is here.”

“We could’ve gotten maccies,” she says, pouting, as her head rests on Charlotte’s shoulder.

Sarah sighs, cuddling closer into Mitch’s side, “We’re leaving for Brighton tomorrow morning.”

“Yeah, Sarah’s making us wake up at, like, five,” Mitch grumbles.

They all start walking towards the exit, Julien and Harry in the back talking about the show as Charlotte links her arm with her as they follow behind the others. As they walk, she remembers how Harry arrived with Sarah and Mitch, meaning they shared a ride, and she turns to look at Harry who seems to be in deep conversation as he waves his hands around.

She feels hot all of a sudden, remembering how neither of them wanted to go inside earlier, how good he looked and how his voice sounded, deep, so deep, when his attention was only on her and not the girl on the stage or his drink or the people around them. As selfish as it sounds, she wanted all his attention on her, she wanted him to only look at her, see her, think of her, and she feels foolish because they only met tonight, and their conversation earlier didn’t last that long.

Once they’re outside, everyone sighs, almost in relief as the fresh air fills their lungs, and everyone bids their goodbyes to Sarah and Mitch, then Phoebe starts complaining about how uncomfortable and tired she was.

“That’s it from us, folks, my wife needs a shower,” Jamie pinches Phoebe’s cheek as Phoebe blushes, swatting her hand away.

She turns to Harry for a second and he’s just standing there, arms folded with an expression she’s unable to read, and Julien laughs, muttering something about catching a black cab since she now has money to waste.

Everyone leaves and it’s only them, and Charlotte comes closer to her as she nudges her hip with hers, “Hey. Is it cool if Harry gives you a ride? Tom’s picking me up.”

She panics and gives her a puzzled look. A car ride with Harry. Alone. Just the two of them.

She swallows, “How come you never mention it?”

“He just texted me, we’re driving up to Manc. Will you be okay?” She reaches and strokes her cheek, then turns to Harry, as if the question was directed at both of them.

“Well, yeah...I mean- I’ll call a Bolt or something-”

“It’s fine, I can give you a ride,” Harry says, hands now in his pockets. He looks like he’s cold too, considering how he’s only wearing a thin shirt and his chest is on full display, letting the breeze softly lick at the flesh.

“I wouldn’t want to be a bother, I can take a Bolt. Really, it’s fine.”

“I insist...whereabouts is your place?”

“Ehm,” she sniffs and her eyes look for Charlotte for a moment, and when she spots her, she’s watching them despite the phone pressed against her ear. “Marylebone.”

“Great! That alright with you?”

She looks at Charlotte again, the short haired girl failing to meet her gaze, and she turns to Harry again, lips pursed, “I guess- I mean...sure. Okay.”

Harry beams at that, the dimple on his left cheek widening with the smile, and she wants to reach out and touch it, place her finger there. She doesn’t though. Instead, she gives him a smile and looks down at her boots, feeling all giddy inside with the realisation that she’d be alone with Harry for a while and it would also be away from any prying eyes, in the warmth of his car.

Charlotte comes back and reaches for her, giving her a big hug as she buries her head in her neck, and she involuntarily breathes in the smell of cigarettes and Charlotte’s personal favourite, Chanel no. 5.

“Text me when you’re home, yeah? And text me if you need anything...he’s nice, I promise,” she whispers the last part, as if she’s letting her in on a secret, then reaches for Harry to give him a hug.

“Drive safe,” she says, walking backwards, “I mean it.”

“I will. Precious cargo, am I right?”

Harry opens the door for her and waits for her to get in, her lips form the words ‘thank you’, and once they’re both inside, seatbelts on, Harry sighs and tries to fix his creased shirt. She watches his hands, the rings catching the light coming from a lamppost outside, creating beams, and she notices the single, nearly-chipped gold nail polish on his left pinky.

“So…” they both say at the same time and he laughs, shaking his head, and a few strands fall to his eyes.

She chuckles too, eyes falling to her hands on her lap as she fiddles with them. “I think we’ve been set up,” she mumbles and looks up at him, finding him watching her carefully with one hand on the steering wheel and the other on his thigh.

“Yeah? You think so?”

“Oh, yeah. I’m usually not this dumb.”

“Maybe you wanted play dumb, hm?” He gives her a smile, causing her to scoff, and he surprises them both when his left hand reaches to stroke her cheek, making goosebumps appear on her skin and she swears she could hear her breath hitch at the warm touch, feeling hot all over.

They stare at each other, his hand still on her cheek, and she swallows, “Sure, whatever you say.”

“Is this okay?” He asks, gesturing at the touch, voice as soft and smooth as honey.

She nods, because it is. It is more than okay and if it were up to her, they’d already be kissing, tasting each other’s dirty, sweaty skin and touching each other all over, feeling each other’s bodies...she wanted all of that.

She swallows again, his gaze shifting from her face to her neck, then lower and lower until it reaches her boobs. They look divine, he thinks, despite the lack of lighting in his car, they look absolutely gorgeous, sort of spilling out from the lace material and he gulps, hand beginning to make its way down to her neck. He rests it there as long fingers caress the side of her neck, discovering a few moles there, and he looks up at her, only to find her eyes fixed on his lap. He looks down to, the slight tent not coming as a surprise, and he gives her a grin, the other hand coming to rest atop his bulge.

“Hm?” He hums as he waits for her answer despite knowing what she would say.

She clears her throat and looks around, seeing the almost empty parking lot all dark except the stop sign near the exit, and turns her attention back to Harry.

“Yes. It’s okay.”

“Mmm,” his fingers curl around her throat, thumb stroking the flesh there, “Thank you, love. Can I kiss you?”

“You can...Please,” she practically moans when his thumb presses a sweet spot on her neck and he gives her a smile, hand reaching to unbuckle both of their seatbelts with a click.

It doesn’t happen that fast. First, he gives her a look, almost as if he’s trying to remember where her lips are and the nose, then her eyes...he keeps looking, and looking, and he brings his hand up to her mouth, resting his thumb on her bottom lip as her eyes shift downwards with the movement. While he watches her, she takes her time to watch him, his face, and she feels something bubbling inside her, much like the bubbles that rise to the top when you open a coke bottle.

Pressure, she thinks, pressure and the need to devour him. Thus, without thinking too much, she reaches and grabs him by the nape of his neck, his hand falling atop the car seat as their lips meet, both of them hungry for each other’s touch as their teeth clash and Harry lets out a hiss when she bites his bottom lip, suckining it into her mouth.

His hands go up to her cheeks, pushing her far enough to look into her face and eyes in particular and he smiles, the inside of his palms feeling the soft peach fuzz on her face. When she lunges forward to continue their kiss, he stops her, thumb stroking her cheekbones as she lets out a huff, and he chuckles, “Slow, baby, slow. We’ve got time. I want to feel you, taste you as much as I can, yeah?”

She nods, letting him stroke the side of her face some more and feel her skin against his soft hands before he starts leaning in, this time slow, so slow that it feels like hours to her. Before she closes her eyes, she catches a glimpse of his pink tongue dart out to lick his lips, and he finally captures her top lip, sucking it into his mouth softly and she melts under his touch, her mouth pursed as she starts responding with her own kisses. Their lips, she feels, fit together like a puzzle piece.

Harry’s tongue swipes across her bottom lip and she opens wider, letting him lick into her mouth further. It’s hot, wet, and she feels herself getting wetter and wetter as the smooch noises grow louder with each kiss. His hands are now cupping both of her cheeks, and as he presses wet pecks on her parted mouth, one of his thumbs travel down to her mouth and he stops their kiss, and she opens her eyes, giving him a puzzled look.

He shushes her, lips pursed as he does so, and her eyes watches the movement, wanting to feel them all over her body now that she knows how he feels and tastes like. He presses his thumb against her bottom lip, then into her mouth and pulls her closer to him. He shuts his eyes and tilts his head when she closes her mouth around his thumb, sucking it like a lolly, and his cock twitches in his trousers again as he watches the way she sucks on his flesh, humming around it as if she’s having the most delicious meal of her life.

“Fuck, baby,” he rasps, “Y’like playing with me, don’t you?”

She doesn’t respond. Instead, she takes his thumb out of her mouth with a pop and she holds him by the wrist, placing his hand on one of her boobs and Harry lets her warm hands and the feeling of lace overpower him as he gives her boob a squeeze, then travels his hand down to where he supposes her nipple is and brushes a thumb over it, a beaming grin stretching across his face when he feels her pebbled nipple under his thumb.

When he looks at her face, she’s biting her lips, eyes shut, and he bites his own lips as he traps her covered nipple between his thumb and index finger, tweaking it gently which causes her to breathe out a moan, toes curling involuntarily inside her boots. He tugs at it, then his hand travels up and he looks at her, as if to ask her permission for what he’s about to do. And she nods, of course she does, and she feels her upper torso getting sore from the position they’ve been in but she lets it go, reaching for his hand near her boob and places it on top of his, encouraging him to keep going.

With her hand on top of his, he slides the bodysuit down from the top, and he feels his cock twitch in interest so he has to bring his other hand down to press against his bulge over his trousers in hopes of relieving some of the tension. He plays with her nipple, tweaking and squeezing it between his fingers before finally leaning to capture the pebbled nipple into his mouth. “God damn, your tits...so fuckin’ hot, baby,” he bites her nipple and she shudders, back arching in pleasure. “Wanna do everything with you...wanna fuck you- wanna fuck these tits,” he whispers against her nipple, now wet with his spit, and his hot breath sends chills down her spine.

It’s warm, his mouth, so warm and wet around her hard nipples and she lets out another moan, arms wrapping around his neck and she tries to press against him closer. “Fuck,” a moan leaver her mouth, “Please, Harry, fuck me. Do something, just- ‘m so wet.”

“Yeah? Want me to fuck you? Jesus,” he presses a kiss to her nipple before he frees her other boob from the fabric, “You’re so fuckin’ hot. Got me so fuckin’ hard, just look at these gorgeous tits, baby. Bet your cunt’s even more gorgeous, hm?” He whispers, hands already on the other boob, squeezing the nipple and he watches as it hardens, looking so pretty and puckered for him and he gets his mouth on that one too, licking across the nipple before he bites it into his mouth.

“Can I take this off, sweetheart?” He touches her shoulder, squeezing her there over the blazer, and when he sees the hesitation in her eyes, he travels his hand up to her neck and strokes it there, “Y’don’t have to, darling. However you’re comfortable.”

“No,” she says ever so softly, “It’s okay.”

He smiles at her as she takes the jacket off and throws it somewhere at her feet. Harry grabs her by the neck and brings her in for another kiss but this time, it’s slow. And sweet. Slow, sweet, and warm, so warm that she feels it in her chest, in her stomach, and it reaches everywhere, the kiss warming anything and everything inside her. He swipes a tongue across her bottom lip before pulling away, and places both hands on her boobs, squeezing them, mouth popping open as he watches them in awe.

“Fuckin’ hell,” he brings one of his hands to the front of his trousers and the heels of his palms press against the bulge, but instead of giving him some relief, the touch makes him hiss, wishing for something softer, warmer.

“Can I fuck you? I need to fuck you, please, sweetheart,” he whispers and she nods, tongue darting out to lick her dry lips and he nods as well, looking around inside the car, swiftly examining the tinted black windows before he turns to her, “I hate that I’m about to fuck that pretty pussy in the backseat of my car instead of a comfortable bed but I need it so bad, sweetheart, I need you,” he licks his lips, “That okay?”

“Yes...more than.”

He helps her move to the backseat, boobs still hanging from the top, and he joins her in the backseat quickly. They’re closer now, nothing serving as a barrier between them, and with the way they’re facing each other, she can make out a tiny pimple on the side of his nose as well as a little mole on his forehead. Her gaze falls to his bulge again, and he’s already fumbling to get them off. With a swallow, she shuts her eyes so she doesn’t see Harry watching her intently, dilated pupils fixated on her sweaty skin, her lips in particular.

He leans in and presses an open mouth kiss to her damp skin, the touch making her open her eyes.

Take it off” she whispers, voice as sweet as honey, “Come on, I want you to fuck me,” she breathes against his hair, his head now in the crook of her neck, and she feels him nod, his hands coming to rest atop hers.

He fumbles with the button with shaky hands, her hands coming to rest on Harry’s waist and he sighs in relief when he hears the zipper. He lowers his trousers along with his underwear clumsily, the pile of material pooling around his ankles. He’s hard and leaking already, the tip an angry shade of red, and she takes a few seconds to admire the thickness of his cock and how pretty it looks, his dark, coarse pubic hair making her mouth water as she imagines deepthroating him, nuzzling the hair at the base of his cock.

Harry looks up and she’s got one hand on her boob while the other rubs herself through her jeans, presumably feeling aroused with the way the fabric is feeling against her pussy. A low, choked ‘fuck’ leaves his mouth following a growl as his long fingers begin unbuttoning the beige shirt and she watches, bottom lip trapped between her teeth with fingers rubbing herself.

Once it’s unbuttoned, he’s quick to get his hands on her jeans, eyes briefly searching for something in hers before he starts unbuttoning them. She stops him and bends over to take her boots off and he watches her back, hand reaching involuntarily to travel his fingers down her spine, stroking her waist before he bends forward to place a kiss on there as she keeps fumbling with her boots. Once they’re off, he’s quick to help her get the jeans off too, and he throws them in the front seat, smiling when she hears her giggle.

“Alright, Miss Giggles?” he says softly, palm resting on top of her thigh as one of his hands reaches and strokes the side of her face, fingers playing in her wild strands of hair.

She bites her lip again, giving him a nod, and he brings her face into his, lips pressing a tender kiss to her chin before he opens his mouth slightly and grazes his teeth across the flesh, and he presses a final, loud kiss there before he pulls away with a pop, leaving her chin all shiny and wet with his saliva. He lowers his eyes and spots her thong, fabric too tiny and flimsy to cover all the areas of her pussy, and he lets out a groan at the sight, hand immediately reaching to touch what’s under her little thong.

“So pretty, darling...so, so pretty,” he murmurs and she watches with parted legs as he positions his middle finger against her pussy over the black lace, thin, so he feels just how warm and wet she is between her folds. This makes him pause to look down at his cock, just to make sure he’s not about to spill all over the carseat since he feels the pleasure at the tip of his cock, ready to explode right then and there. “How can anyone ever resist you, hm? This pretty girl…” with one hand still between her legs, he reaches with his other hand and ghosts his thumb over her nipple, his other hand working her thong as he pulls it to the side, “...this pretty pussy,” he murmurs, making her eyes lull shut at the compliments.

She parts her legs wider to give him more room to work with, and he grins as he looks up at her hungry eyes, knowing what she’s asking for. And god, is he about to give her what she wants. The way she looks, not just half naked but from the moment he’d caught a glimpse of the grumpy girl across the room, it’s been driving him insane. Not that she was rude or looked bored, but she looked cute, kinda nervous, as if she too was as uncomfortable as Harry by the prying eyes and tipsy chatter around them.

From the moment they were introduced, Harry knew she didn’t particularly like to be looked at. Maybe he was being judgmental, or reading too much into things, but he got the impression that she was sort of nervous to be around people, especially new people. He tried his hardest not to be some weirdo, an utter creep who kept looking at the beautiful girl across him but truth be told, it wasn’t the first time Harry had seen the girl’s face.

He knew of her, stories about her, from Charlotte, and saw numerous photos and throwback videos of them on Charlotte’s Instagram, but he would never actually admit to the fact that he’d clicked on her tag on one of Charlotte’s posts, and scrolled through her feed for hours, giggling from time to time at her silly captions and numerous pictures of a Golden Retriever and a black cat cuddling.

Yes, he might have found her interesting, took a few screenshots of her posts where she proudly displayed her favourite reads, immediately ordering everything on there, and a few funny memes, but now with his middle finger circling her clit, he would never, ever admit any of that to anyone, ever.

“Harry,” she breathes, and it sounds sort of harsh, rough even, the reason presumably being a mix of the cigarettes she’d been smoking and the way his finger teasingly, slowly moves over her pussy. “Harry…” she says again, melodiously, fingers curling around his wrist and he looks up with a grin, eyes almost evil, dark and pupils dilated from hunger bubbling up inside him.

He retracts his finger and brings it up to his mouth slowly, her eyes watching him like a hawk, and his pink tongue darts out, licking a long stripe up his middle finger and he truly devours the savoury taste, eyes finding hers as he sucks the finger into his mouth. “Taste so good, sweetheart,” he murmurs, “Want me to play with that beautiful cunt, hm? Give it my full attention?”

“Yes, please, I need it so bad, I’ve been waiting for so long.”

“Yeah?” He asks, ever so softly, “How long?” He presses, his middle finger once again placed between her wet folds, and she wraps her fingers around his wrist.

There’s a bloom of pleasure in her voice when she lets out a shaky breath, a stuttered ’yeah’ because she doesn’t want to give in to Harry’s teasing game, and he leans forward, capturing her chin with his mouth as he bites the flesh while the pads of his finger massages slow and deep over her swollen clit.

He feels the spongy bit under his touch, “Tell me you’ve been thinking of this too,” he breathes against her wet chin, then brings his middle finger down to her hole. It’s wet, so fucking wet when he drags his finger back up and circles her clit faster than before which makes her legs kick out in pleasure, one hand grabbing harshly at her boob as the other go up to Harry’s soft hair and she pulls, fingernails scratching his scalp while doing so. He groans against her skin and drags his finger down to her slick little hole again, circling around the wet, soft muscle and he pushes his finger in, her cunt making a wet, lovely sound as he does so as his eyes fall to his throbbing cock.

It’s so hard, an unpleasant feeling blooming inside, so he takes his finger out of her hole, making her let out a tiny whimper as she clenches around nothing with the sudden loss of his touch. Harry brings his finger up to his mouth, and his pink tongue darts out to lick, mouth closing around to devour the slightly salty slickness.

“Can I fuck you now?” He asks as his hand goes to stroke the side of her neck, goosebumps appearing immediately at the touch. She shudders, unable to respond and Harry’s voice is softer this time, “Can I, baby? Will you let me fuck your pretty pussy now? I need it so bad, sweetheart, so fucking bad. See how hard I am for you? So fucking hard for you, baby.”

“God,” another shaky breath, “Please, I’m so wet and horny- I need it, Harry, please.”

“Need my cock, yeah? Need me to fill that little hole? Stretch your tiny little hole, darling?”

“Fuck- please, I- please stop teasing me, I need it...please, fuck me.”

Harry feels something, a prickly sensation inside him, his groin tightening, and he knows it’s her dirty mouth and sweet face to blame. He looks down at his cock, hard as rock between his legs, and grabs her by the waist, pulling her on top of him with ease. “There, sweet girl.”

He lets out a hiss when her warm pussy makes contact with his cock and she bites her lip, leaning forward until their sweaty foreheads meet. “Your pussy’s so fuckin’ warm. Shit, we need condoms,” a strong arm wraps around her waist and she gasps when he leans forward so suddenly. His face is buried into her boobs as he tries to retrieve his wallet from one of the compartments in between and she watches him struggle, unable to control a tiny laugh escaping her mouth.

“Well,” Harry mumbles, warm lips making her skin feel all tingly, “This is lovely...mmm,” a few kisses are pressed between her boobs, then another open mouth one on her left nipple, and they’re finally back to their previous position, condom package between Harry’s lips as he rips the top, never once taking his eyes off of her while doing so.

“Ready for me?” He gives himself a few lazy pulls, thumbing at the tip while she watches, one hand kneading her boob. “Hm? Ready to take my cock?” He moves his hand slowly, up and down, causing her to swallow.

“Yeah...fuck yeah. Please, fuck me.”

He looks up at her as the rubber works its way down his cock, and she joins her arms around his neck, fingers playing with the hairs at the nape of his neck, and he brings his cock to her cunt, earning a moan from her, her warm breath licking at his face ever so softly. He grunts, voice strained with pleasure when he feels how warm and wet she is at the touch of his cock and slides it against her warmth before he brings it down to her tight little hole and pauses there.

“Y’ready, sweet girl?” He nudges their foreheads together and it’s sweet, so sweet despite the position they’re in, and she nods, feeling their damp foreheads stick together, and Harry gives her a bright smile, dimple appearing on his left cheek.

And he pushes it in. With his thumb pressed against the tip, he pushes his cock inside her, the tightness squeezing his already sensitive cock as if she doesn’t want to let him go, as if she wants to keep him inside of her forever and ever.

“God, such a tight cunt, baby. Squeezing me already, hm?” He murmurs into her mouth, “Easy, darling...slow. Slow, yeah? Want to feel you properly,” his hands go up to her hips, holding her there to still the movement of her hips, and her arms loop around his sweaty neck, fingernails scratching the back of his neck and he hisses, face moving forward to press a bruising kiss on her parted mouth.

Once she calms down, hips stilled, his strong arms begin moving her up and down and they both moan, quick breaths leaving their mouths and mixing together just like how their bodies are almost joined together, two becoming one, and Harry starts moving his own hips so he can fuck into her as she helps her by moving her own hips up and down, slowly, just like he’d asked her to, feeling his cock stretching her tight hole with his every move. There’s a honking outside and both their movements still for a second, and a muffled chuckle leaves her mouth, arms tightening around Harry’s neck.

Their eyes meet, Harry’s mouth turning upwards, “What’s so funny, Miss Giggles, hm?” He murmurs as his hips speed up again, their skins slapping against each other as his cock strokes the insides of her walls ever so softly, sliding in and out of her.

“Jesus, you’re so fucking big, I- I knew you’d be big but...fuck, you’re so good, so fucking good, Harry,” she moans, earning a grunt from him as she meets his thrusts, her hands sliding down to Harry’s shoulders and squeezing his smooth skin briefly before she brings her palms down to her chest.

She strokes the hair on his chest, admiring the way his cross necklace sits proudly there, amongst his now damp chest hair, and she brings her palm to one of his nipples, thumb stroking the slightly darker nub and he lets out a groan as goosebumps appear on his chest and nipples.

“God,” she breathes and Harry can smell the fruity-sour alcohol on her breath, and his mouth pops open when she tweaks his sensitive nipples. “I love your nipples,” she moans again when his cock brushes that sweet spot inside her and he does too, arms tightening around her waist, and she tweaks his nipples again, this time harder as her hips speed up, ass slapping against his meaty thighs and she keeps jumps up on down on his cock.

As she does so, her boobs too move, bouncing up and down with her every movement and Harry reaches with one hand, capturing one of her nipples between his fingers as he tweaks left and right before letting it go, watching her skin prickle at the touch.

“Shit, y’feel amazing, just wanna keep you forever,” he groans, low and delirious, fingernails digging into her waist as he thrusts into her, “So fuckin’ tight around me...so tight and snug. I want you- want this everyday. Wanna be able to touch you, kiss that little face everyday, fuck this beautiful pussy...so good, darling, you’re so fuckin’ good, letting me fuck that sweet cunt in the backseat, hm? Are you good,” he breathes her name into her mouth, then bites her bottom lip, earning a gasp from her when his thrusts become particularly rough. “Are you a good girl?”

“Yes, yes, yes, I’m good, I’m so good, please- I’m gonna cum, I’m gonna fucking cum please keep fucking me, keep fucking me hard, Harry- keep going,” she speeds up her movements, Harry’s cock sliding in and out of her as wet, dirty sounds fill the car and he curses under his breath, hips lifting off the seat to meet her strokes.

“Are you close?” He manages to ask, a low grunt in his voice.

She doesn’t respond. Instead, she brings one hand down to her pussy and begins rubbing her clit, moaning when she touches the little nub and then, with her other hand, she reaches for Harry’s face, thumb stroking the side of the smooth skin before she places it on his bottom lip and presses hard, making him part his mouth. She pushes it in, eyes lulling shut at the feeling of his warm tongue as he sucks on her thumb, hips continuing their movements as he fucks her cunt with quick, rough thrusts.

When she opens her eyes, Harry’s watching her, sweat glistening on his forehead and she brings her finger down to where Harry’s cock meets her warmth and rubs the top of his cock, moaning when she feels the vein there. She brings it up to her clit again, all wet and warm, and she rubs harder with rough strokes as Harry juts his hips forward a few more times. “I’m gonna cum, fuck- I’m gonna fuckin’ cum, baby,” his grip tightens on her waist and she places her hands on his shoulder, squeezing there.

“Come on me, I want it on my tits,” she mutters, fingernails digging into the smooth skin of his shoulders and he lets out a grunt, pulling out quickly as she gets down, Harry’s legs parting immediately so she can get between them.

And she does, gets on her knees between Harry’s parted legs as he takes the condom off, hissing at the feeling as he tosses it somewhere on the floor, and he begins stroking his now-wet cock as she thumbs at her nipples, kneading her boobs before pushing them together. His wrist works harder and quicker at the sight and he finally comes undone, his warm cum spilling onto her boobs, decorating her soft flesh with white stripes and she looks down, watching with sparkling eyes.

“God, fuck,” he breathes, letting his head tilt back, “You’re something else, y’know that?”

She hums, sending him a grin as he gives himself three more lazy strokes before he lets go of his cock and watches the spattered cum against her skin separate with the movement when she lets them go.

“Got some on your top, sorry, love.”

She looks down, then swipes a thumb across her skin and brings it up to her mouth. Pushing it in, she sucks around her digit as she tastes the salty-sour taste and Harry watches, all wrecked and fucked out.

“It’s fine, don’t worry about it.”

“You’re so naughty...come up here,” his ring-clad fingers reach for her wrist and he helps her sit next to him.

He reaches the little pocket behind one of the seats, taking out some tissues as she watches him take out a few and clean her up as much as he can. Then their eyes meet, both sleepy and wrecked, and he lifts his hand up to her cheek, stroking it, and she leans into the touch, making him smile. “You’re lovely,” he mumbles, hand still on her cheek.

“You’re lovelier.”

He chuckles as she fixes her top, “You really are. Really lovely.”

“Stop it, I’m not good with compliments.”

“Well,” he shrugs, reaching for his trousers on the front seat, “I said what I said. You hungry? Thirsty?”

“I’m kinda thirsty. Aren’t you?”

As they lean against the bonnet of Harry’s car, now parked outside a McDonald’s, there’s a comfortable silence between them as they sip their waters, bodies close to each other, close enough for Harry to smell his faint cologne on her skin.

“You cold still?”  He turns to her as she takes a bite of her chocolate muffin, and he follows as a few crumbs land on her chest.

“I’m good. Feel very warm...ed up,” she chuckles, thumbing at the corners of her mouth.

Harry groans, nudging her with his shoulders and she nudges back, harder, and he gasps, “Oi, be nice. I’m feeding you.”

“Soz. Guess I owe you like...what is it, a fiver?”

“You’re a very mean girl.”

“I’m the nicest. I’m good,” she gives him a grin, earning another eye roll from him as she takes another sip of her water before placing it on the floor, “Seriously though, thanks for the muffin.”

“Don’t mention it. I’m kinda bummed you turned down the nuggets but…maybe next time?”

“Next time?” She asks, crossing her arms, trying to warm herself up despite her promise from earlier.

“Well,” he clears his throat, hand going up to his necklace, “I’d love to see you sometime. Again. Preferably for longer than an hour and...you know, just us two? Hanging out?”

She smiles and leans forward, taking him by surprise when she presses their lips together. It’s a sweet, slow kiss, and his hands grab the back of her neck, pressing their faces closer as they kiss. Her hands find his waist and she gets on her feet, coming to stand between his legs without breaking their kiss, and she loops her arms around his neck, smiling when he moans at the feeling of her fingers playing with the hairs at the nape of his neck.

He tastes the muffin, the chocolate, and himself, and as foolish as it sounds, he wishes there was a way to be closer to her somehow, closer than they already are at this moment. She pulls away, their foreheads pressing together as they smile at each other.

Harry scrunches his nose and smiles, bringing it forward so their noses touch, “What was that for?” He whispers, hands tight around her waist as he hugs her closer.

“Just felt like it...just felt like kissing you.”

“Yeah?”

“Yeah. I like kissing you. I liked kissing you a lot tonight.”

He smiles, nose booping against hers once again, “I liked kissing you a lot too. I’d like to kiss you a lot tomorrow. And maybe the day after that.”

“That’s fine by me. You can kiss me tomorrow...and the day after that,” she whispers, pressing their bodies together.

Harry closes his eyes, taking a deep breath as she watches with curious gaze, eyes crinkling with a smile.

“What are you doing,” she whispers, and he shushes her, smiling when he opens his eyes to find her staring with her eyebrows raised, “What are you doing?” She asks again and he squeezes her waist, forehead pressing against her once again and he leans in closer to press a tiny kiss on the corner of her mouth.

“I’m listening,” he whispers, lips almost touching hers as he speaks.

“Listening? What are you listening to?”

He strokes her cheek, “A song.”

She raises her eyebrow again, “What song? I can’t hear it. Are you- you’re not actually serious, are you?”

“Ssh, it’s a song. Listen,”

“Har-ry,” she groans, pressing her forehead on the crook of his neck, “What is it?”

Harry smiles, arms hugging her closer as she presses a tiny kiss to the side of his neck, “Aubade.”

SEND ME YOUR THOUGHTS ABOUT AUBADE AND PLEASE REBLOG THE FICS YOU’VE READ AND ENJOYED TO SUPPORT AND MOTIVATE WRITERS <3

[lostinthewiind]

Piss Off Your Parents - Part 4

Ukai Keishin - Haikyuu

Synopsis: freshly turned 18, you want to prove to your parents that you aren’t a child for them to push around anymore. First, get a job at the local corner store. Second, use the store owner’s 26-year-old son with piercings and a cigarette addiction to piss your parents off. Third, accidentally fall in love.

Rating: Mature

Warnings: mentions sexual experiences of reader before she was of age, discussion about sex lives, flirting, touching 

Song → 18 by Anarbor

Previous →Part 3

Next →Part 5

Head resting in your hand and elbow resting on the counter, you huffed, still not used to the heat that accumulated in the store throughout the day and praying for just one customer to walk through the door so you could experience a refreshing blast of evening air. You supposed you could go outside yourself to cool off a little, like Keishin had previously suggested in lieu of sticking your head in one of the fridges, but being the only person at the store currently, you felt a little bad about leaving the building, even if it was just to step out front.

You were still trying your best to put on a good impression for Mrs. Sakanoshita—despite the rough first impression you had made on her son—and you knew the family store was precious, so you decided to suck it up for the remainder of your shift.

Without much to do, since you had completed your chores early, you remained seated at the front counter, bored out of your mind. That was, until your prayers were answered and you heard the front doors slide open.

“Hello!” you greeted happily, ready to welcome a customer. Your radiant excitement faded when you noticed it was just Keishin, however, and went back to slumping on the counter. “Oh, it’s just you.”

“Wow, those rapid mood changes must be why we’ve been so busy lately,” Keishin shot back at you, a cigarette hanging from his mouth like usual. “Will the girl behind the counter smile or frown at you? Maybe it’ll be both. Oh, how exciting!”

“Can it, dye job,” you grumbled.

Keishin feigned hurt, his hand resting over his chest dramatically as he pretended to have been shot. “Words hurt, you know. You’ve hurt me.”

“That doesn’t matter,” you told him, lazily gesturing around the empty store. “What does matter is that we’ve been dead for hours and I’m bored.”

Keishin poked his bottom lip out and faked a pout. “Awh, poor baby. Is getting paid to sit there and do nothing hard work? You must be exhausted. Poor thing.”

“I don’t get paid nearly enough to put up with you.” You reached across the counter to lightly smack his shoulder but he jumped out of the way just in time. “Seriously though, stay and entertain me for a while.”

“If you’re that bored, why don’t you dust the vents or something?”

You laid your head down on the counter and exhaled slowly for effect. “You know I aim to please but that sounds like hell. Can’t you just talk to me for like ten minutes? Tell me about your day or something.”

Keishin threw his head back and groaned loudly. “But I’m too hungry to think about anything other than food right now.”

“I’m hungry too but you don’t see me complaining about it.”

“No, you’re just complaining about everything else.” He leaned against the other side of the counter, his tongue flicking against the tip of his cigarette as he thought. “Actually, I’ve got a better idea.”

You glanced up at him, waiting for him to elaborate. “I doubt it but proceed.”

Done with your constant back talk, which was extremely common between the two of you ever since you had worked out your differences and agreed to the deal he had suggested, he took a drag of his cigarette and blew the smoke directly into your face. “Just shut up and listen, will you?”

You coughed when you accidentally inhaled the second-hand smoke. “If I get cancer and die, I’m haunting you.”

“Go ahead.” He didn’t pay any attention to the words leaving your mouth as he headed into the back room and shut off the store lights. Then, with his own set of keys in hand, he headed back toward the front of the store. “Come on.” He looked back at you expectantly when you didn’t immediately follow.

Confused, you slowly stepped around from the back of the counter. “Where are we going?”

“We’re closing up early and going to get something to eat.”

You narrowed your eyes at him, half of you wondering if this was some sort of employee test to see how responsible you were. “Are we allowed to do that?”

“I am, you aren’t,” Keishin said, beckoning you over to him. “But let’s just keep this between you and I, yeah? What my mom doesn’t know won’t hurt her. Besides, it’s slow anyway.”

Taking off your white apron and grabbing your things, you reluctantly followed the older man out of the store and watched as he locked up behind the two of you. Anxiously, you shifted your weight from foot to foot. “Are you sure I won’t get in trouble for this?”

“I promise I won’t tell on you,” Keishin assured you as he stuffed the keys back into his pocket and dropped his cigarette bud to the ground before crushing it with his foot. “Let’s go. I’m starving.”

Falling into pace beside Keishin as the two of you set off down the sidewalk, you following his lead, you weren’t sure exactly sure what to say or even if you should say something. Never before had you and Keishin existed outside of the store together and it felt a little awkward. 

“So . . . is this like a date or something?” You regretted the words as soon as they left your mouth. What you had meant to come across as a casual inquiry ended up sounding more like a desperate girl clarifying what she meant to the boy she liked. You sounded like a child.

The corners of Keishin’s mouth curled upward and he shrugged. “Call it whatever you want.” He really didn’t seem to care one way or another. “Although, I’d be a horrible boyfriend if I didn’t take you out at least once . . . fake or not.”

You nearly choked on your spit at the use of the word ‘boyfriend’. Even though you had been pretending to date him for the purposes of changing your parents’ ideals for the past few weeks, you were still caught off guard every time Keishin referred to himself as your boyfriend—even though he was usually doing it to mock you. 

“Yeah, just awful,” you agreed halfheartedly. “Where are we going anyway?”

“This little place that I like,” he said, his answer extremely vague until he continued. “Best ramen I’ve ever had.”

After a few more minutes of walking, the two of you arrived at the place Keishin was talking about and he ordered two take-out bowls and paid for them both, insisting that you should try his regular order since you had never been there before. Not wanting to disagree because he was footing the bill, you let him do what he wanted and tailed him out to a picnic table outside like an obedient puppy. 

“It’s much too hot to eat inside,” Keishin reasoned as he plopped down on the opposite side of the picnic table from you. “Plus, it’s nice outside. Might as well enjoy the weather while it lasts, right?”

“Right.” You nodded.

While Keishin dug right into his meal, you sat still, hands in your lap, and watched him. One thing you had quickly come to realize was that Keishin was the perfect specimen for people watching, and not just because he was relatively easy on the eyes. He was an interesting person; for example, how he tucked half-smoked cigarettes behind his ear to smoke later or how he always wore a headband to keep his hair out of his face but vehemently refused to just cut his damn hair. 

Even though you bugged him about cutting his hair all the time, you secretly hoped he would continue to stand his ground and refuse because you wanted to see what he looked like with his hair down. You also wanted to run your hands through his hair—it looked soft and fluffy—but that was besides the point.

“Hey, it’s gonna get cold,” Keishin snapped you out of your thoughts, his mouth half full of ramen as he jabbed his chopsticks in your direction. “Don’t tell me you don’t like ramen. You should have said something before I ordered for both of us.”

Snapping out of your daze, you picked up your chopsticks and shook your head. “No, I like ramen.” You took a bite to prove your point. “Sorry, I was just lost in thought.”

Keishin waited for you to eat a little more before digging for your consensus. “Good, right?”

“Yeah, really good,” you agreed. “I always walk past this place but I’ve never gone inside.”

“I was the same way. It doesn’t really catch your eye, so unless you’re looking for it, it’s easy to miss,” he said. “Then one day my grandpa took me here for my birthday and I’ve been coming ever since.”

You snickered. “Popular date spot then?”

Keishin cocked a brow. “What?”

“I mean, if you come here a lot, I’m sure it’s a go-to for dates,” you continued. “It even comes with a wholesome story about how your grandpa introduced you to it. Ultimate chick magnet.”

Keishin just rolled his eyes at you. “You know, contrary to popular belief, most girls don’t like it when you take them out to eat cheap ramen on a picnic table that’s falling apart.”

You chuckled. “I wasn’t going to say anything about the table, but I’m pretty sure I have at least ten splinters in my ass by now.”

“Yeah, this thing is torture. So eat fast and then we’ll move to the park across the street or something.”

Shoveling the rest of your food into your mouth, you ate fast while Keishin stared you down, every second that passed introducing your butt to a new world of pain. As soon as you were done, Keishin took both of your take-out bowls and tossed them into a nearby trashcan.

“Well, sucks for all those other girls then, because that ramen really is amazing,” you said when Keishin returned, the two of you crossing the street and heading into the park. 

“Told you.” Keishin smiled. “I’m glad you liked it.”

Once in the park, which was empty considering it was dark out and most kids were in bed by then, the two of you picked a nearby bench that wasn’t splintering and took a seat. 

Drawing your knees up to your chest, you wrapped your arms around your legs and sighed. “Thanks for dinner.”

“Yeah, no problem.” He let his head fall back and looked up at the night sky. “Damn, I could really go for an ice cold beer right now.”

“Well, we could start heading back now if you want,” you suggested. “The beers at the store are extra chilly since I didn’t stick my head in the fridges to cool off today, despite how sweltering it was.”

Keishin laughed. “Well, thank you for that,” he drew in a deep breath and relaxed into the bench, deciding whether to get up or not. “Let’s stay here for a while longer though.”

“Okay.”

Silence fell over the two of you as you stared up at the sky and listened to the sounds of Miyagi in the evening. You tried to remember the last time you had gone out like this—just going wherever you wanted and doing whatever you wanted. You couldn’t recall the last time . . . or even if there was a last time.

Tilting your head to look at Keishin, you smiled at the sight of him sitting with his eyes closed, arms crossed behind his head and head lolled back. He looked happy, almost as peaceful as he did when he was sleeping.

“Hey,” you whispered.

Keishin cracked an eye open to look at you. “Hmm?”

“Thanks for tonight.” You breathed in the scent of the night air and a feeling of content washed over you. “As you’ve probably already figured out, I don’t really have any friends. I don’t get to go out like this very often . . . or ever, really.”

“You don’t need to thank me. It’s what boyfriends are for, right?”

You giggled. “Well, considering you’re not my real boyfriend, I think a ‘thank you’ is in order.”

“Well, you’re welcome,” he caved. “Speaking of fake boyfriends, how’s it going with your parents?”

You let out a frustrated moan. “Oh, about as well as expected. When I mentioned I was seeing someone they bombarded me with a million questions, none of which were answered to their satisfaction.”

Keishin cringed. “So I’m that bad, huh?”

You scoffed. “If you think that’s bad, you should have seen their faces when I showed them a photo of you.”

Keishin let out a laugh. “Don’t tell me they weren’t fans of the piercings?”

“Oh, they weren’t fans of anything,” you said. “I think the only positive thing they could say about you was that you had a pulse . . . no offense.”

“Eh, no worries. At least they didn’t call me a burnout . . . then I would have started crying.”

“Hey!” You smacked at his shoulder again, managing to hit your target this time. “I said I was sorry.”

“Sorry doesn’t pay for my therapy.”

“Yeah, well, if you need therapy I doubt I’m the biggest reason.”

“You really are so cruel to me. Do your parents know you facilitate abusive relationships?”

You closed your eyes and shook your head. “That insinuates I’ve had past relationships, or any real ones.”

Keishin craned his neck to look at you, eyes wide. “Wait, you’ve never been in a relationship before? Like never?”

“Nope. I don’t even have any friends, so what makes you think anyone wants to date the boring girl with the crazy parents?”

Keishin looked at you like you were some wounded animal he had just found on the side of the road. You could see in his eyes he was slowly coming to terms with just how isolating your life was. You could tell he felt bad, but the last thing you wanted was his sympathy.

“Hey, don’t look at me like that,” you told him. “I’m not completely pathetic, okay? I still went through my experimental phase like most teenagers do. I just had to be very sneaky about it.”

“Sneaky?”

“You know, back of a car, other people’s houses when their parents were gone. As far as my parents know, I’m untainted . . . a precious, naive virgin. I’m just not very experienced.”

“I can imagine.” Keishin was a little thrown by the direction the conversation had taken, but you were both adults and he would be lying if he said he wasn’t a little curious, so he just rolled with it. “High school boys aren’t exactly known for being great in bed.”

The two of you let out a shared laugh at that. “You got that right,” you agreed. 

“So, wait, no relationships but you’ve had sex? So you’ve never been with someone you have a genuine connection with?”

You eyed Keishin, perplexed by the sudden sincerity in his words. “You didn’t peg me as someone who cares about that kind of stuff.”

“I mean, I’ve had my fair share of one night stands, sure, but I’m not completely heartless,” he said, the eye contact he was using while he spoke sending a chill down your spine. “It’s completely different when it’s someone you care about. The experience is something everyone should have at least once in their lives.”

“I don’t think I’ve ever had a genuine connection with anyone before,” you confessed, unsure why you were spilling some of your deepest secrets in public, on a park bench, to a man you had only known for a couple of months. “It’s kind of hard when everyone is held at an arm’s length away.”

Without warning, Keishin shifted closer to you and placed his hand on your face, the pad of his thumb ghosting over your bottom lip. “I . . . I don’t know what to say,” he breathed.

“It’s not sad, not for me at least. You can’t miss something you’ve never had,” you spoke softly, worried you might scare him away if your voice was too loud or if you made any sudden movements. “No best friends, no boyfriends. Just me, my parents, and everyone else.”

Keishin looked like he wanted to say something; in fact, he looked like he wanted to say a lot of things, but despite this, he remained silent. Maybe he was worried about offending you, or maybe he was finally understanding just how different you were from other people. Maybe he didn’t like different. 

“But now there’s you.” You flashed a small smile, hoping to draw him out of whatever mess was going on inside of his head. “I’ve never met someone like you before.”

“Someone like me?” he finally spoke.

You nodded as you placed your hand over the one he was resting on your cheek and held it. “I’m not your responsibility and yet you’re going out of your way to help me. Not to mention I don’t even deserve your help. You are the first truly selflessly kind person I’ve ever met. Thank you.”

“What if I’m not as kind as you think I am?” His hands found their way to your waist and he pulled you into his lap so you were straddling him. “What will you do then?”

“That depends on what you’re planning on doing.”

Hands running up your sides, Keishin dug his finger tips into your skin as you lowered your head toward his, mouths inches apart. “What if I took you home, laid you down, and took care of you like a boyfriend should?” You could feel his hot breath on your face as he spoke. “What if I took advantage of your lack of experience?”

“I would say thank you,” you said, inching closer. Before your lips met, however, you stopped yourself. “But I promised not to fall in love, and I think it would be awfully hard to keep my promise if you did that.” With that, you planted your hands on his shoulders and pushed yourself away from him before he could make a decision he would later regret. 

Standing up, you collected yourself and drew in a deep breath. As soon as you had detached yourself from Keishin, you could see the fog that had been clouding his judgement dissipating as he came back to his senses. 

“I should probably head home now.” You decided, not wanting to ruin the first actual friendship you had by doing something stupid and selfish. 

“Yeah.” Keishin nodded, slowly standing up as well. It was clear he was slightly embarrassed by his actions, but you also noticed the glint in his eyes that gave away the part of him that still wanted to take you home with him. 

Trying to immediately leave what had just happened in the past, you smiled and turned to start heading home, opting to take the longer way so you wouldn’t have to take the same route as Keishin. “Good night, Keishin.”

“Good night, Y/N.” You heard him call after you, but you didn’t look back at him. Instead, you kept walking, hoping the time apart would serve as a reset on your relationship and put things back to how they had been before that night.

A few weeks ago, you would have jumped at the chance Keishin had dangled in front of your face just now. But since then, you had realized he was more important to you than someone you could just throw away with a one night stand. And since there was no way the two of you could actually be together, this was the only option if you didn’t want to lose him.

If only someone had warned you that genuine connections were this complicated. 

[talesofstyles]

Reconcile II

Ok so I know that I wrote the first part with reader insert, but after many, many attempts to keep it that way, it just didn’t work with this one. So I’d like for you to meet Emma. This is my first time writing with OC and wow game changer. I love her and I hope you do too!

Also, I honestly can’t thank my beta queens enough @oh-honey-styles @for-fucks-sake-h 🥺💛 thanks for allll the comments and suggestions and nice words!!! ily both xx

Read part I here

Harry

“So… are we okay now?”

We’re sitting here on the sofa, finally having that very much needed father-daughter date. Granted, a movie night in was not what I had in mind. I wasn’t too thrilled when she said she wanted to just go back home after we dropped George at his classmate’s house for a birthday sleepover. I thought she would hole up in her room instead and ignore me. But she didn’t. I got us pizza for tea, and we’ve got Shrek 2 on the telly. Her animosity towards me disappeared just like that after she asked for a puppy the other day. Of course, I’m glad to have my happy-go-lucky daughter back, but deep down I know that we need to have a proper chat. The change in her behaviour is so abrupt that I know there’s a chance that my daughter is still bitter with me deep down. And that won’t do. I can take a lot of things, but my daughter’s resentment is not one of them.

“Yeah, we’re okay,” she nods as she takes a bite of her pizza. “You’re still getting me a puppy right?”

“I still need to talk to your mum about it, poppet,” I tell her. “Puppies need a lot of attention. It’s going to be hard work and that puppy is going to be a permanent member of our family. We’ve really got to think about it before we decide.”

I expect a little excitement knowing that her mum and I are really considering getting a puppy. But what I get is quite the opposite. My little girl’s gaze drops, her face slackening. Her voice cracks a little when she mumbles, “except… we’re not a family.”

I wince, realising how serious the effect our split has on my daughter. Despite Emma and I putting on a friendly, united front for our children, Minnie is still sad that her parents are not together. 

“Of course we’re still a family,” I assure her, pulling her to me for a comforting side hug. “I’m still your dad, mummy is still your mum, and you and George are still the lights of our lives.” 

“But you and mummy aren’t together anymore,” she points out bitterly. “And you live so far away from us now. I miss having you at home.”

“I know, my love,” I murmur gently, and turn sideways so she can see my face. “It’s killing me too. But you never know what the future holds, right?”

“I guess,” she says glumly.

I wish I can tell her that I’m trying to win her mum back so we can be together again, but I know I can’t do that. This is far too early. I don’t want to get her hopes up in case I’m not successful in convincing my wife to give me another shot. That’ll only break her heart all over again.

Thinking back, I realised that this is the first time we have a proper chat about our split. I fled to LA the next morning after my wife asked me to leave our marital home back in London, leaving her to sit down with our children to tell them that I was not going to live there anymore. I was shocked and angry because I had no idea what I’d done. I thought we were fine. There were no fights leading up to that. I still remember exactly what I told her. ‘You’re the one who wanted to end it, you tell them.’ And then I left.

Just like that. Without a fight.

I swear to God, it’s something that I would never be able to forgive myself. 

“How’s your mum?” 

“She’s sad,” Minnie sighs. “She cries a lot. She thinks we can’t hear her in the shower, but we can.”

Knowing I caused that physically hurts. I rub at the throb of pain behind my breastbone and I think about all those private tears I shed through it. The ones you hope are hidden and silent.

“Can I ask you something, daddy?”

“Anything, poppet.”

“Do you still get sad too?”

I’m not sure how much to divulge here. Does my daughter need to hear that I stopped eating? That I once cried in the loo at Cafe Habana, and once had to be fished out of a bath by Jeff after I turned into a human prune? I was sad. I still wear that hat. 

“I do. It’s the end of something, that’s always sad.”

“I think mum is dating someone,” she says and my eyes widen. “She told us Luke is her friend, but I think he’s her boyfriend. They’re on a date now, aren’t they?”

I can try and deny it, but I know my daughter is smart and won’t buy anything I tell her.

“What do you know about boyfriends?” I tease, my attempt to lighten up the mood. 

“I’ve just turned nine, I’m not stupid,” Minnie rolls her eyes. “‘Sides I’m thinking about getting one of those boyfriend thingies.”

I sit there slack-jawed, and my daughter roars with laughter.

“Minnie Alexandra, you’re going to drive me to an early grave, you know that?”

“Hey, what are you middle naming me for? I was joking!” She says, still laughing as she picks a piece of pepperoni off her pizza.

“How do you feel about your mum dating again?” I ask her.

She pauses. “I don’t know yet. As long as he’s nice and doesn’t put me under the stairs…”

“I’m sure he won’t. In the attic maybe,” I joke.

She laughs again. I’m thinking about keeping that bloke in the attic so my wife won’t date him anymore. Or even better, six feet under my patio. That’ll do.

“It’s gonna be okay, right, dad?”

Honestly, I’m not sure. But I don’t have the heart to tell her that.

“Yeah, Min. It’s gonna be okay.”

***

I see the headlight shining into the front windows as I walk down the stairs from tucking my daughter into her bed. That must be Emma and her date. I pull back the curtain a little to peek outside, and I’m right as I see that bollockface’s car in front of the house. 

You know that saying; curiosity killed the cat? Well, in my case, curiosity fucked me with a chainsaw. 

I’m a bloody idiot. I should have just closed the curtain back as soon as I recognised the car. I mean… it’s the end of a date. What did I expect to see? A high five? I knew I was so sure when they left that he would not be getting anything more than a friendly kiss, but that date must have gone really well, because right now, my eyes may as well fall out of their sockets as I see that bastard’s tongue down my wife’s throat. 

I’m frozen. I’m gripping the curtain so tight that my knuckles are turning white. I stand there—stunned. Watching. I’m not even sure for how long. It does feel like forever. Like an eternity. 

In hell.

And then Emma pulls back, and everything seems like a blur. I have to remind myself that my daughter is sleeping upstairs so I won’t go apeshit and knock that wanker square on his arse. 

I’m still glued to the floor by the door. I’m too shocked to move. I hear the sound of keys rattling before the door swings open, and she looks surprised when she sees me.

And all hell breaks loose.

“What the fuck, Emma?!” She jolts at hearing me shout. I rarely did it. In fact, I’m not even sure if I’d ever yell at my wife before throughout our marriage. “You told me last night you’d never even kissed him. You told me you weren’t ready.”

“I- I don’t know. He caught me off guard. That was-”

“I told you I wanted to make this work,” I remind her, trying to lower my voice so I won’t wake my daughter up. She doesn’t need to see this. “Us. Our marriage. I told you I wanted to fight for you. But I can’t do that with someone shoving their tongue down my wife’s throat, can I?”

As soon as the words leave my mouth, I see her tear up and I immediately feel regret. That was harsh. But before I can apologise, I can see her lip curls up and I know she’s about to get nasty. It’s a rarity with her when we’ve fought in the past, but I feel it coming.

“You’re unbelievable, you know that?” She sneers. “You think that if you put a toy down, it’ll still be sitting there when you want to play with it again.”

“That’s-”

“You have no right to be upset at me. We’ve split up for nearly a year now. What I do and what I don’t do on my dates is none of your business.” 

“I want us to give our marriage another shot,” I say in exasperation. “I want to try to win you back, but fuck’s sake you’re not even giving me the time of day.”

“Oh, look how the tables turned,” she taunts. “Sucks, innit? Being the one struggling to find the time when it seems like the other doesn’t give a crap?”

“Cheap shot, Ems,” I retort.

“Truth hurts, doesn’t it, H?” 

Emma averts her eyes, her lower lip quivering. I can’t tell if she regrets her harsh words or not, but she doesn’t look back my way, and she seems to have said her piece.

I knew sooner or later this was bound to happen. We never had our big fight, not even that night when she decided that enough was enough.

“I cannot possibly go through that again. It physically hurts,” she says softly. “I know I was the one who ended it, but when you just left like that the next morning without so much of a fight as if ten years means nothing to you… that really did hurt. You left me alone to talk to the kids about what happened. And sure, you did call every day. But it took you nearly nine months to finally come and see your children?”

“I needed some time. Some space,” I tell her. “Do you think it’s easy for me being there? Away from my wife and kids?”

“You chose to be there.”

“You know I couldn’t stay in London,” I murmur. “It’s too hard. At least in LA sometimes I can just pretend that everything’s okay. That we’re okay. That my wife and kids will be there waiting for me when I get home. I can’t do that in London.”

“That’s a shit excuse and you know it,” she mutters.

“I still love you, Em,” I say with a sigh. I know trying to defend myself further for what I did will get me nowhere. “We can fix this. We can be a family again.”

“Harry, it’s too late.”

“Is it him?” I can’t help but go there, because that’s a possibility. “Do you love him already?”

“Luke is a fresh start for me, H. I may not love him now but at least it doesn’t hurt looking at him. It took me months to be able to get back up again, to get to where I am right now. To finally find a little bit of peace.”

Emma’s head hangs low, and she rubs at her temple with her fingers. I want nothing more than to pull her into my arms. But by how stiff her spine is, I can tell she wouldn’t come willingly. 

“I’m sorry, Emma,” I whisper, resigned. Tears well up in our eyes. There’s nothing I can say that will change her mind because we’re not seeing eye to eye. She’s still focused on the past, not that I blame her because I did hurt her badly, but I know that there is no way we can go anywhere if she can’t see past the harms I’ve caused in the past.  “I hope one day you’ll be able to forgive me.”

“I’ve forgiven you a long time ago,” she says, her expression softens. Her thumb runs at a part of her finger where a ring used to be. “Now, I just want us to try and make this separation work. Focus on the kids. Let’s do the right thing by them.”

I nod.

“Can I ask you something?”

“Yeah.”

“When did it all start?” I ask, my voice cracks a little. “When did you start feeling like you’re invisible to me?”

“I’m not sure I can point down to one exact moment,” she takes a shaky breath and pauses. “The change was gradual that by the time I realised it, I didn’t even recognise us anymore. I spent days and nights wondering what happened to us. That wasn’t us.”

I wipe that one tear running halfway down her cheek, and as soon as my thumb touches her skin, I lose it. I can’t help it by this point. Tears flow as much as I try to hold them back. She’s crying too. This is painful. 

“And it’d be too easy to say that I felt invisible,” she continues. “Because the truth is, I felt painfully visible. You ignored me on purpose. I wasn’t even sure what I was to you anymore, because the only chance for me to get your attention was by getting you in bed. And that was wrong. It hurts, because it felt like you only needed me to warm your bed.”

I want to deny that statement. I want to yell it’s not true. That I never intended to take her for granted. That she still makes my heart skip a beat like a bloody teenager seeing his first crush. 

But I don’t.

Because she’s right. I’m not sure what happened either, but we’d changed. Maybe it’s our jobs, maybe it’s the endless responsibilities. Domesticity, children, they wore us down. Kisses became perfunctory. Hugs became less frequent. Hell, I couldn’t even remember the last time I took my wife for a date night other than for social obligations.

“I’m sorry,” I tell her again. I’ll spend the rest of my life apologising to her if I have to, she deserves it. “I hurt you badly. I really am sorry, Emma.”

“It wasn’t all you though,” she mumbles. “I never called you out on it.”

“You didn’t,” I reply. “I never worked out why?”

“I swept it under the carpet because it was embarrassing. It felt silly having to ask for your attention. And I don’t know… pride, maybe? And the kids. I didn’t want them to know something was wrong. So I played along and carried on like nothing was happening.”

“When really…”

“It was like a punch to the guts each time. You were an excellent father. You still are, the kids adore you. This may sound insane and it’s embarrassing and painful for me to admit this, but there were times when I saw you with the kids and I couldn’t help but feel jealous. When you couldn’t even be bothered to look at me… it felt like you took a dump over all my love for you.”

“Emma…”

“I wish I could get past that. I wish I could just forget what happened and trust you again.” 

I bring her in for a hug and say nothing. She needs to get this all out. This is part of the process, and I’m here to listen. 

But where do we go from there?

Reconciling a broken marriage is tricky. I am not a violent person but I have never wanted to strangle people as much as I want to strangle those who wrote articles with countless advice regarding this subject, making it seem like it’s easy. Talk it out, get your point across, and you’re out of the dog house. Well, you know what, bollockface? It turns out that listening is not enough. Sod you and your dumb articles. 

All I know is that I can’t rush this. She’s not ready, and that’s okay. Right now, we both have things to work on. She needs to learn to let go of her resentment, and I have to learn not to take anything and anyone for granted ever again. This is killing me, but there is no one to blame but myself. I take solace in knowing the fact that I don’t know what’s going to happen in the future. Maybe one day we’ll be back together. Maybe we won’t. 

“Thank you for telling me all that,” I mumble against her hair. 

“Thank you for listening,” she looks up and gives me a sad smile.

***

Emma comes from a big family. 

There’s Jamie, her eldest brother and the only guy. I think the fact that he grew up surrounded by sisters was what made us the closest in the first place. He hates wine, even though he makes a career out of managing his own vineyard. I know, the irony. The next is Suze, sister number one who lives in Sheffield with her husband and three girls. Suze and her husband are both orthopaedic surgeons. Then my wife, the middle child. Then Meg, sister number two who just had a baby. It’s another girl so my George is still the only grandson in the family. And then Lucy, the youngest of the clan who’s still in university. 

They all live nearby, and I knew that all my in-laws hated me a tiny bit for taking their daughter and sister away. They were a hard outfit to infiltrate. You don’t enter into a relationship with one of them, you get a whole gaggle of them. It was hard to get in, but once you’re in, you’re in for life. 

After we’d split, I called my parents-in-law the next morning just before my flight to LA. I wasn’t sure whether or not Emma had told them about what happened, but I felt like it was the right thing to do. After all, they’d become my parents too for a decade. So I explained and apologised. Of course, I didn’t tell them the details because I knew they were between Emma and me, and they respected us enough not to ask. They were upset, but they also understood that these things happen in life. All they wanted was just for their grandbabies to come out of this unscathed. 

Now here I am, walking behind Emma and our children as we step over the threshold into her parents’ home for their monthly roast. Her parents invited me and I accepted. I don’t want to turn down any extra time I have with my kids as I’ve decided to leave today and head back to London. I was prepared to stay longer, take some time off work and fight for my marriage, but since it all has gone to pot, I figured I should leave. The world doesn’t stop even when you’re struggling with marital woes. I’ve got work to do, and I also know that it is best to give Emma space. 

I hear voices as we walk inside.

“If littl’uns are going in highchairs then what’s that extra space for?” I hear Meg’s husband say.

Meg tells him. “Count again, addition was never your strong point.”

“Oh.”

The house is suddenly quiet when they see me. This is my first time seeing the whole family again after we split, and even though my parents-in-law and I are on good terms, and Jamie too, I know the sisters would be a different story. All four of them are beyond close and they’re now looking at me as if they should’ve chucked me in the oven instead of the chicken.

You don’t do that to our sister. You hurt one, you hurt all of us. 

“Uncle Harry!” Freya shouts in excitement. She is one of Suze’s daughters. She and her twin sister Tessa are only a few months older than my George.

Suze, who is sitting on the sofa, looks a bit sullen, not knowing what the right call is to make. Meg and her husband freeze. 

“Alright there, mate?” Jamie greets me, trying to ease the tension. Suze glares at him.

“Are you here to do magic then, Uncle Harry?” Tessa asks. 

I bend down to her level. “Not sure I know any magic, Tessie.”

“Yeah you do!” Freya pipes up. “Because when we were driving here, daddy said you did a disappearing act on Aunty Ems. Show us what you did!”

“FREYA!” Her dad barks.

Meg can barely contain her giggles.

“But we like magic. You’re rubbish at magic,” she says to her dad. He widens his eyes. 

The sisters are now all smiling smugly, knowing a couple of six-year-olds just shamed me on their behalf. Extra roast potatoes for those two.

Lucy, the littlest sister, suddenly enters. That’s definitely not a happy face. “Oh, it’s you. Is that why everyone went so quiet? What are you doing here?”

“Luce,” Emma mutters.

“Because I invited him,” says a voice emerging from the kitchen. My father-in-law. “Harry, glad you could make it.”

“Of course,” I reply. “Thanks for the invitation.”

Lucy stares daggers at her dad, knowing she can’t unleash her trademark rapier wit as she’s surrounded by her little nieces and nephews. That one may be the youngest but she’s the scariest out of all the sisters, my wife included.

“Look, if it’s weird, I can just leave?” I offer.

“Nonsense, you must stay for supper,” Emma’s mum replies.

“Yeah, Harry, stay,” says Emma’s dad, staring at his daughters. “I want you lot to be nice. Otherwise, I’m putting you on the kids table. You hear me?”

The three of them nod in unison. 

“You two look well,” I say, my attempt to make small talk. 

“You know, dad’s been singing this morning,” Emma’s mum chirps, tilting her head towards her husband. “He joined a male choir. They think they’re Westlife.”

We all can’t help but laugh. This is classic mum. The tension seems to ease away. 

Let’s just hope it stays that way.

***

There’s a strange feeling of déjà vu as I take a seat on the steps in front of the cottage. 

I’m all packed up and ready to go. My weekender bag is in the boot of my car. Nothing left to do but say goodbye to my wife and kids, but I don’t go straight inside. 

Not yet. I need a moment.

These steps witnessed a lot of our marriage even though we’d never stayed here for longer than a couple of weeks at a time. We loved to sit out here in the summer. I remember when I first brought my stuff here shortly after we got married, we sat out here with beers, sleeves rolled up, boxes stacked into Jenga-style columns. 

I also remember sitting here last year on Christmas morning. Emma and I were both in our pyjamas and slippers, sipping coffees out of our matching Christmas mugs. We watched the kids ride their new scooters up and down the street. Everything was perfect. I had no idea that my marriage would end in just two months after that.

“Harry?”

I look over my shoulder and I urge her to sit beside me. She comes over and does just that. There is silence. We don’t say a word to each other. A quiet hum of traffic in the distance, puffs of breath cloud the air making me think we should both be wearing coats. Christmas is nearly here again. My heart aches at the thought of this being our first Christmas since everything fell apart.

“I’m sorry,” she says softly.

“I should be the one apologising, Em.”

“I know you wanted to work things out,” I hear the sadness in her voice. “I really loved you, you know that, right?”

“I do,” I nod. “Our marriage, all those years… it wasn’t all bad, though, right?”

“Of course,” she quickly replies. “We had our moments. We have Minnie and George.”

We pause, letting that sink in. In all this mess, those two were and remain everything, some symbol of our marriage not being a complete disaster. 

“There were also times when you were a good husband,” she adds.

“Why do I feel like you’re going to pat me on the head?”

Emma laughs under her breath.

“Your new bloke seemed a nice sort,” I tell her, because it’s true. I may hate the guy with a burning passion, but that’s only because he’s dating my wife. 

“He is.”

“That got legs?” I ask her.

“Possibly.”

“I want you to be happy, Ems,” I tell her. “With or without me.”

“Harry…”

“But I also want you to know that I’ll be waiting for you. No rush, no timeline. I’ll wait for as long as it takes. Because for me, it’s either you or no one else.”

The front door opens and two little faces pop out from behind it.

“What are you doing out here? It’s freezing!” Shouts Minnie.

“Well then come here and give me cuddles to warm me up,” I tell her.

Emma and I take a kid each. She takes George and lets him entangle his legs in hers, cradling himself into the hook of his mummy’s arm. Minnie uses me like a climbing frame. I bop her on the nose as I’ve done since she was a baby, and I like that it never stops being hilarious to her. The sky starts to dim, trees casting shadows onto the pavement. A house down the road has some festive lights that switch on and flicker on and off in strange syncopated patterns.

“This is nice,” Minnie mumbles. “I miss the awesome foursome.”

“The awesome foursome, huh?” I ask.

“That’s what you used to call us,” I hear the sadness in her voice and my heart aches. I know she feels this all a lot more than her little brother. “I still remember.”

“Do you really have to go again, daddy?” George looks at me with sad puppy dog eyes. 

“Yeah, do you?” Minnie asks. “I love having you here.”

“I do, my loves,” I reply sadly. “Be good for mummy, alright? I’ll be back soon, I promise.”

“I don’t like seeing you go,” George mumbles.

The emotion is a little unbearable and I see a tear trail down my wife’s cheek. George looks petrified seeing his mum cry. 

“Don’t be sad, mummy.”

“I’m not sad,” she shakes her head, quickly wiping the tear off her cheek. “I’m just sorry daddy and I couldn’t make it work.”

“Did we do something wrong?” George asks, looking at his mum and then me.

“Oh, mate,” I reach out to cup his face, Emma pulls him into a hug. “Of course not. You didn’t do anything wrong. You two are perfect, you hear me?”

“Do you still love each other?” Minnie asks.

Emma looks at me in the eye as she answers our daughter. “I’ll always love your dad, because he gave me both of you.”

“And I’ll always love your mum,” I say, my eyes pinned on my wife. “No matter what.”

Emma

“So… tell me, he a good lay? He looks the sort to have some girth.”

I probably should have warned you beforehand about this sister of mine.

Lucy is my entertainer sister who has done every job going alongside studying. She went to dance school, spent six months on a cruise ship, has been an extra and once did a two-month stint in Les Misérables. On weekends she dresses up as Disney characters and does kids’ parties which means she owns a lot of wigs and always has glitter in her bra. She’s the fun one. I keep her close because as much as I love my other siblings, this one has been a good entertainment through my separation. Mum suggested for her to live with me for a couple of weeks when I first moved back to the Peak, and I’m so glad she did. It was around the time I lost a stone and would spend most of the time napping, crying and staring at the wall, surviving on cups of tea and Rich Tea fingers. She couldn’t cook or clean and she used all my shampoo but she brought some light into the house when grey clouds threatened to consume it. She was also a great distraction because I could live vicariously through her tales of going to gigs and clubs and hear how she’s not slept and got her boobs out for reasons of fun and frivolity.

However, when you talk to her, she always goes there. She’s brash and has no conversational limit. She thinks her purpose is to not only feed me but also revive a pretty dead sex life too. Actually, it’s not just her. After my husband and I split, my sisters think it’s their job to pique my interest in men again. Luke happened after a boozy Chinese takeaway about two months ago when I joked that a spring roll was the most phallic thing I’d had in my mouth for over half a year. I remember a dumpling rolled out of Meg’s mouth in shock, so Suze decided to play the matchmaker and introduced me to Luke who worked at the same hospital with her.

Tonight, we’re having another takeaway night since my parents have all the grandchildren for the weekend. Bless them for entertaining that crew of children we seem to have acquired over the past nine years. We have seven between Suze, myself and Meg, and I just hope that my parents are well stocked with wine. They will need it. 

We all sit around my dining room table with the remnants of a KFC bargain bucket, a selection of Thai food, a giant bag of chips and some battered sausages. I’d admit that we were already a little drunk to buy food sanely. Luke is also here, I thought it’d be nice to give my sisters the chance to get to know him. And it doesn’t take Lucy more than thirty seconds after Luke gets up to take a phone call before asking such questions. 

“I don’t know? I haven’t slept with him yet.”

Lucy looks at me in confusion. “But you’ve been on dates and stuff?”

“We did have a cheeky snog last week but we’re taking it slow.”

“What are you waiting for? Just go shag him. Erase the memory of that wanker?” 

“Hey, he’s your niece and nephew’s father,” I chastise her for calling Harry names. “Don’t call him that.”

“Why don’t you want to sleep with Luke?” Meg, my other sister asks me. “Lucy is right though. He’s really tall, I bet he’s VWE.”

“What’s that?” I ask.

“Very well-endowed.”

I chuckle. “Honestly, I wouldn’t know what to do with it.”

Meg giggles and places her head on my shoulder. 

“Last time I had sex was on Valentine’s Day, girls. Do your maths. The next day, my marriage collapsed.”

Both of them huddle into me like penguins. 

“Which is why you just need to get over yourself,” Lucy remarks. “You need to remember what sex is like. It’ll be fun and make you feel good. If you don’t want to do it with Luke, you can have some taster session? I’ve got a uni mate who’d shag you.”

“Lovely. No.”

Lucy huffs. “You’re so boring.”

“Honestly, Em, Luke is fit. Seems like a nice fella, and he genuinely likes you. I’d have a go on him if I weren’t married. You should just do it,” says Meg.

“Yeah, you could shag him tonight,” Lucy adds. “Meg and I can piss off out and then…” 

Then she does a strange rave-style dance as she thinks of her plan coming together. Luke returns from his phone call and Lucy jiggles in her seat. Don’t you bloody dare. 

“Luke, we need more wine,” says Lucy. “There is not enough and we thought you could walk down to the shop and get some?”

Meg and I look at each other for a second, wondering what our sister is up to. 

“Sure, yeah, I could get wine,” Luke replies. “Any other requests?”

If she tells him to get condoms in then I will skewer her with a chopstick.

“Anything you might fancy or need?”

She’s walking an incredibly thin, thin line. 

Luke gets up to retrieve his coat and grazes my hand as he does. This move doesn’t go unnoticed by Meg and she gives me a sly wink. I hand him my keys and he heads for the front door. Meg stares Lucy out.

“Seriously?” She says.

“We need to prepare you if you’re going to sleep with him.”

“Like mentally?” I ask.

“Like have you had a tidy? This will be your first time. You’ll need to at least tidy up the flaps and do a bit of topiary.”

“LUCY!” I gasp and laugh at the same time, holding my hand to my face. Who is this woman? How can you raise five children in the same house and come up with such a random entity?

She stands up and heads for my kitchen drawers, rifling around until she pulls out a pair of scissors.

“Show me your bush,” she orders.

“Lucy! I prepare food with those scissors.”

“And we’ll wash them?”

Meg is in hysterics as she sees this scene unfolding in front of us.

“I’m not getting my bush out in my kitchen.”

“You’re so dull,” Lucy complains. “I’m trying to help here. What are your pits like? Shame there’s no time to tackle your upper lip.”

I put my hand over it instinctively. “I’ve got a moustache?”

“Well, you’re not Tom Selleck but it could do with a bleach.”

“You’re being cruel now, Luce,” Meg giggles. “But I think we do need the comedy of seeing Lucy trimming your bush in the kitchen.”

I stand up reluctantly and unbutton my jeans.

“Ha!” Exclaims Lucy. “You’re wearing nice knickers, you knew this was going to happen. Just peel them back a little and let me have a look.”

“Be quick for fuck’s sake. This is something that no one needs to see.”

“Do you want a shape?”

“What?”

“Yeah, like a heart? It’d be cute.”

“No!”

Meg roars with laughter.

“I’ll just trim the length then,” says Lucy. “Meg, put your hand out.”

“Do I have to?”

“Don’t you love your sister enough to at least hold her pubes?”

I’m not even sure what’s happening here. One sister is very close to my private regions with a sharp object and I hear the creak of metal as she shears away. The other collects the trimmings in a napkin in her palm. This feels like an opportune moment to ring Suze, our other sister, and start a FaceTime chat. That time we all took one for the team so Emma could reclaim her sex life.

“Thanks, Luce.”

“You don’t say this enough I feel.”

“We really don’t,” says Meg.

“Want me to look at yours, Meg?”

“I’m good.”

“What if he’s into weird stuff?” I ask.

“Like?”

“I don’t know… maybe like choking? Stuff like that.”

“Well, no one breaks out all the moves on their first time,” says Meg but Lucy gives us a look like she begs to differ.

“And I’m not on anything. I stopped the pills months ago. What if I get pregnant?”

“That’s what condoms are for?” 

They both give me a look that says I am not fourteen and that I should have an inkling about how reproduction works and the preventative measures that I can put in place to stop myself from getting pregnant. 

“How do I initiate it?”

“Maybe you could dance for him?” says Luce mockingly. “You’ve both had a drink, let it just happen. Planned sex is the worst kind of sex.”

“I planned nothing. You’re the one who’s got the kitchen scissors.”

“I’m done, anyway. Not my finest work but then at least he’ll be able to find it?”

Meg laughs again as she goes to the bin with her napkin of pubes. I do my jeans up and sit at the table, downing what’s left in my glass. What if he can’t get it up? Or worse, what if he doesn’t like my boobs? I have modest boobs. They wouldn’t win any competitions. What if he wants better boobs?

“You’re overthinking,” says Meg.

“I haven’t got any condoms.”

Lucy reaches inside her handbag, pulls out two packets of johnnies and hands them to me. How far ahead has she planned this?

“Any other excuse?” Lucy asks.

“Look, tonight, just get naked with the fella, have some bloody fun. Enjoy yourself.”

I hear the key go in the latch of the front door. That was quick. Crap. Luke enters the kitchen with two bottles of red that I immediately feel guilty about as I’ve got a rack of it in the utility room. He also carries a few packs of crisps and takes the kitchen scissors that were on my table.

“No!” I stop him. “Those need to be washed.”

He looks at me in confusion and I love that he puts them in the sink without any further questions asked. He rips opens the packet of crisps with his hands instead.

“Crisps?”

Lucy grabs a handful of crisps before she grabs her phone, pretending to read some texts. “Bollocks! Meg, we forgot about the party.”

Meg quickly plays along. “Oh yeah, crap. It’s that birthday party, innit?”

I feel awful. I’m sending the sisters back out into the cold so Luke and I can have the house to ourselves. They both keep winking at me which is more down to the fact that they’ve had at least a bottle of wine each for themselves tonight. Luke stands at the kitchen door while I wave everyone off. This feels weird. 

“Have fun, kids!” Chants Lucy as she shepherds Meg away from the house. I shut the door.

And then there were two. I turn around and Luke is no longer at the doorway. I tiptoe into the kitchen to find him stacking plates. 

“Shall we tidy up now?” He asks.

“It can wait.”

My phone on the table lights up with an incoming text. It’s Lucy. Don’t forget to adjust your tits. Make sure they’re facing forwards. Show a bit of bra. 

Does this mean my boobs are not always facing forward? Where are they looking? This isn’t helping at all. I ignore it.

“Alright,” Luke says with a smile that makes me feel relaxed but also on the faint side of nauseated. It’s probably first time nerves. Is it weird that I’m thinking about the cleanliness of my bedroom? Did I pick up yesterday’s bra from the corner of my room? Do I remember how to go down on a man? What if he doesn’t fancy me?

Sometimes I can’t help but wonder whether my marriage ended with Harry because I was terrible in bed. Maybe I wasn’t attractive enough. I’ve had kids, parts of me are stretched and doughy. Maybe I didn’t provide what he needed. 

In the last year of our marriage, I think it’s safe to say that I was mainly the one to initiate things between us and my success rate wasn’t 100%. There’s this nagging thought in my head that maybe even on those nights I succeeded, those were just pity shags.

You know what, sod it. 

I grab him by the collar and kiss him. He stumbles a little but then lets his body fold into mine. I can do this. Crap. He’s lifting me up. He sits me on the counter and I’d like to say the moment overtakes but there’s red wine inches from my arse so I move the glass with my hand whilst still kissing him. We’re kissing. This is weird. It’s different. It’s not my husband’s lips. Why am I thinking about my husband’s lips? 

I shake my head, banishing that image. Harry doesn’t belong in this room with me right now. 

I feel his hands in the small of my back and then he lifts my jumper over my head. I’m in my bra. Don’t overthink it. Oh, the bra is off. My nipples are out in the kitchen. I run my fingers through his hair as he trails kisses down my neck. Is it weird that right now, at this very moment, all I can think about is that his blond, floppy hair looks like a golden retriever?

I gasp and push him away involuntarily when his mouth wraps on my nipple. This is wrong. This feels wrong. I thought it was just first time jitters but now I think this is deeper than that. 

“Are you alright?” He asks, looking concerned.

I grab my jumper and quickly put it back on. “I… I’m sorry, Luke. I can’t. I have to go.”

“Emma, I’m sorry,” his face reads panic. “Did I read the signals wrong? I thought you wanted this. I feel terrible. I’m so sorry.”

“No, please don’t apologise,” I say hastily. “You didn’t. I did want this. Or so I thought. It’s just… I’m not ready. I don’t think I’ll be ready any time soon. Or ever.”

“What do you mean? Are you breaking up with me?”

I have to be straight with him. I take a deep breath. “I want to give you the opportunity to walk away. You’re a good guy, Luke. I just don’t think it’s fair for me to string you along if we can never progress.”

“Is it your ex-husband?”

He’s still my husband. But I don’t say this out loud. 

“He told me that he wanted to give our marriage another shot about two weeks ago when he was here,” I tell him. “I did say no right away. I didn’t think it was a good idea. But…”

“Is it really?” He asks. “You two have a lot of history. Two kids. Why wouldn’t you give him a chance?”

“I’m worried.”

“And what are you worried about?”

“My heart?” I say quietly. “I don’t want to go through that again.”

Luke smiles at me through sympathetic eyes. “Listen to me, Emma. I’m not a cardiologist, but I know that the hearts are the strongest organs in the human body. They can go through anything.”

What happens next feels like a blur. All I know is that by midnight, I’m already halfway down the M1, on my way to London. 

Harry

It was a knock on the door that woke me up.

When I first open my eyes, I’m disoriented. I don’t know what time it is, or how long I’ve been asleep. Then I realise I’m on the sofa, and it’s still dark outside. It’s also raining. I walk towards the door and open it, just in time to catch a figure going down the steps, which doesn’t take me more than a second to recognise. I am in complete shock. Is this real? Is that really my wife, standing in front of my door in the middle of the night? Or are my eyes deceiving me?

“Emma?”

She stops on the pavement and slowly turns to face me. She’s spooked through—her jeans moulded to the curves of her legs, the sleeves of her jumper dripping, her hair flat, lips slightly tinged with blue.

“I don’t know why I’m here,” she says. “Don’t know what I was thinking.”

I open the door wider, and my voice is drowsy and deep when I say, “Come on, let’s talk inside.”

She takes a step back instead.

“I just… I wasn’t thinking. I’m here. I don’t know why,” she sounds genuinely bewildered—even a little panicked.

“Are the kids in the car?” I ask her and she shakes her head. The wind blows, spraying ice-cold drops across my bare skin where my shirt hangs open. “You’re shivering, honey, come inside.” 

She stares at me, so many emotions swirling in her expression. She’s like a skittish kitten who can’t decide if she should let the stranger pat her head or haul up the nearest tree. It breaks my heart.

“I don’t think I can.”

So I go to her. 

The rain is cold and hard, soaking my shirt. Her eyes dart from the pavement, to my chest, up to my eyes and back again, like she’s ready to bolt—but her feet stay glued.

I lean in so she can hear me through the rain. “Do you remember the first time we went to Paris together? When we were young and crazy enough to only rent one electric scooter for both of us, and we rode around the city at night?”

The corners of her mouth tug up a little. “I remember.”

“But then I was going way too fast and we hit a rock, and both of us went flying. I didn’t want to ride anymore the next day, because I was afraid you’d get hurt. Do you remember what you told me?”

“I said…” she begins, her eyes meet mine. “I said we had to keep riding. Because it’s the only thing that made falling worth it.”

I nod tenderly and hold out my hand. “I’m not going to let us fall this time, Emma.”

Her eyes are back on the pavement. “I’m not sure-”

I know she still doesn’t trust me. I know that sadness on her face and how it penetrates so deeply. I know she’s probably better off without me, the bastard who crushed her heart and soul and took her for granted for years. 

We shy away from the things that hurt us. But that’s what scars are for. They protect the wounds. They cover them with thick, numb tissue so we’ll never have to feel that same pain again. The scars that my wife has inside? They’re tough. 

I beg when she continues to stare at my hand, “Please, just come inside.”

Slowly, tentatively, her hand slides into mine. 

And we go in out of the rain.

I take her upstairs to the bedroom that used to be ours. Her teeth chatter as she sits on the edge of the bed. I throw a blanket over her shoulders, rubbing her arms, sliding down to cup her hands. 

“Shit, you’re freezing. How long were you out there?”

“A while. I was walking… thinking.”

“Just some friendly advice. Next time you go a-wandering, stop and buy an umbrella.”

Emma shivers as she laughs. I pull the blanket closer around her and rub her back. 

“So… you gonna tell me what’s this midnight adventure about?” 

Her voice comes out soft and wavering in the dark room. “I was with Luke.”

“Did he do something to you? I’ve watched enough crime documentaries to pull a perfect murder.”

She shakes her head and chuckles. “We were having a takeaway night. Meg and Lucy were there too, but then they left and there were just the two of us and-”

“Please spare me the details,” I beg.

“Nothing happened. I just… I couldn’t get through it. Your face kept popping out in my head and I knew that if I went all the way through, we’d lose our chance. And I didn’t want us to lose our chance. I know this is completely the opposite of what I said to you two weeks ago but it’s true. I wasn’t ready then and maybe I’m still not ready now, but I don’t know about the future and you said you’d wait for me and…”

Her words trail off and my chest clenches with that sublime mix of excitement and trepidation. Of wanting something so much it’s like every cell in your body is stretching, reaching for it, yet there’s a grey shadow of worry that you might never get to touch it.

“Oh, Ems…”

I cup my hands around hers and blow into them. Another shiver vibrates through her. 

For a moment we sit there in silence. Memories of us in this bed come flooding back. Of the kids piling in here bright and early, and us having cuddles and catch ups over the week just gone. Of the two of us and that sacred half an hour we had together before we go to sleep. Where we could have a proper chat without little voices interrupting us every few seconds. Sometimes we’d read together too, and other times when we just couldn’t be arsed, we’d simply spend that half an hour scrolling through memes and having a laugh together.

“You’ve got to get out of these wet clothes,” I say gently, with absolutely no teasing suggestion. We’re right on the precipice. I can feel it. And I have to tread so carefully, because one wrong move could send her away, truly lost to me.

I peel my soaked shirt off and let it drop to the floor. Her eyes move, trailing over my shoulders. I stand and slowly unbutton my jeans, leaving me in black boxer briefs. 

Her eyes follow my every move, looking at me.

I push the blanket off her shoulders and let it drop to the floor. I grasp her jumper at the bottom and lift slowly. I wait for her to push me away but she doesn’t. She raises her arms instead. I pull the jumper over her head and it lands with a plop on the floor. I remind myself not to enjoy the view. I’m trying hard not to look.

My chest rises and falls as rapidly as hers. I sink to my knees in front of her and reach out for the button of her jeans. She lifts her hips and my fingertips graze her skin as I slide them down her thighs, leaving the white lace knickers in place. 

“Get under the sheets,” I whisper and she does just that.

She scoots to her side of the bed, and I slide beside her. Without a word, she snuggles into my side. The cool feel of her flesh is a shock at first, but in just a few moments, my heat chases away her chill. Except for her feet. I practically jump when she runs one up my calf.

“Yer a bloody ice cube!”

She laughs kind of evilly. 

We face each other, almost nose to nose. Her hair still drips at the ends and a drop trickles over her collarbone, down her chest, and I’ve got to take a deep breath—because I want to lick it off her so badly.

“Talk to me,” she says softly.

“I’m taking time off work.”

“But you never take time off work?” 

“I’ve got a lot to make up to the kids,” I tell her. “So I told Jeff to bugger off for at least until after New Year.”

I see her smile in the dim light.

“I’m gonna stay up with my mum,” I add. “I’ll only be an hour away from you lot.”

This is something that I’ve been mulling about. If I really do want a chance with Emma, I need to move up there because absence does not make the heart grow fonder. That may be true in secondary school when you went away for the summer. But in marriage, especially in a broken marriage, absence separates people. It creates distance. That’s the opposite of what you’re trying to achieve. You want the closeness back.

My wife’s palm runs over my bicep—tentatively at first—then with a surer touch. “They’d love that.”

“Also, you remember my old mate Stu?” She nods. “We got in touch just earlier today. He’s got a litter of puppies and he offered one for us. I told him I need to talk to you first. So what do you think?”

“A puppy, huh?”

“A puppy.” 

“I think that’s a good idea,” she says. “But I’ve never had a dog though.”

“I can train it first at my mum’s?” I offer. “I’ll get it all settled. Then when it starts sleeping through the night, I’ll bring it over.”

“Does it make me a terrible mum for wishing we had that kind of service when the kids were newborns?” 

“We had that service. It’s called sending them to the grandparents.”

We both laugh, and when the laughter dies down, we’re silent for a few minutes. The thrum of my heartbeat jacks up as her hand continues to stroke my arm. 

“Harry?” Her voice is the barest whisper, like she’s checking to see if I’m asleep. 

“Hmm?”

“I… I’ve missed you. So much.”

And I’m done.

The need to kiss her, to touch her, has been pulling at me like a raging current ever since I saw her on the front step, and with those few words, I let the current take me. 

***

Numerous studies have shown that having sex extends the human life span. At this rate, Emma and I are going to live forever. We probably slept twenty minutes max throughout the night and I’ve lost count of the number of times we’ve done it. I’m pretty sure the last time we did something like that was ten years ago on our honeymoon. 

We’re sitting at the breakfast nook. Her hair mussy and she’s wearing one of my T-shirts. She looks freshly fucked, which I know to be true, and I reckon she’d be ready to crawl back into bed with me if I just crook my finger. But I don’t do that. Because this, us, sitting here in the morning sunlight, playing footsies under the table while we talk over coffee is all I’ve been dreaming about every morning.

“What are you thinking about?” She asks when she catches me looking.

“You,” I smile. “You look perfect.”

“No, no more,” she shakes her head frantically. “I won’t be able to walk.”

“You dirty lass, I was trying to be romantic and all that,” I can’t help but snort in laughter. “And you always do that… rebuff any type of compliment I try to give you.”

It’s true. If I tell her she looks beautiful, she waves a dismissive hand at me. If I compliment her mind, she blushes. Even an appreciative look from me has her turning shy like a schoolgirl.

When she doesn’t respond to me, I continue to poke at her. “Why is that? Why does it embarrass you when I tell you that you’re smokin’ hot?”

She wrinkles her nose at me. “Because it’s weird. I feel like you just have to say that.” 

She pretends to go through one of her old magazines from when she still lived here. I reach across the table and bat at it, causing one side to pull out of her hands and reveal her entire face to me. Now she’s glaring. “You are the most beautiful woman I’ve ever known.”

And I grin when I see red stain her cheeks.

“And you’ve got the most gorgeous body. I take one look at you naked and I can’t help but get rock hard.”

“Stop it,” she blusters, now blushing all the way down her neck.

I change tactics, but I know this will embarrass her just as much. “You are the most amazing woman. Kindest, genuine and grounded. Funniest too. And you’re the best mother for our babies.”

“Okay,” she snaps at me as she closes the magazine and slams it down onto the table. “You’ve made your point.”

Chuckling, I stretch back in my chair and nudge her foot with mine under the table. “You’re adorable.”

She rolls her eyes, which I find to be beyond adorable. 

Standing up from my chair, I walk around the table and hold my hand out to her. She willingly takes it and stands when I give her a tug. It’s a natural move for her, to walk straight into my embrace and press herself against me. I tilt my head and kiss her on her jaw. “It’s something you need to get used to… compliments from me. It’s never going to stop.”

She moans softly in my ear.

“Want to know what else you’re going to have to get used to?” I whisper as I kiss my way down her neck.

Her fingers come up, tangle in my hair, and fist tightly. “What’s that?”

“My face between your legs.”

***

Some people might not put Quaglino’s into the romantic restaurant bracket, but they’d be wrong, very wrong. In actual fact, it’s quite hard to top. The interior has this 1930’s romance charm with candlelit tables, dark-panelled walls and an adjoining room for dancing to the soft tunes of the piano man singing bluesy versions of classic songs. 

Tonight, I managed to convince Emma to go out to dinner with me before she goes back to our babies. I insist on driving her since I don’t want her to drive alone at night again, which she initially refused but finally agreed.

We finish our dinner and split a slice of cheesecake for dessert. Probably not my brightest idea since I keep having to readjust myself because seeing her slowly swallow a mouthful of white, creamy concoction is a pure kind of torture. But I try to kick those dirty thoughts out of my mind and focus. 

Since last night, we’ve successfully managed to avoid the talk. It feels like we’re in a bubble where everything is perfect and we’re just scared to burst it, but I know this can’t go on. Emma and I need to have a proper chat if we want this to work.

“Penny for your thoughts.”

“You and I need to talk, don’t you think?” I begin. 

“You’re right,” she nods. “So…”

“What is this?” I gesture between us. “Are you ready to give us another shot?”

“I think so,” she nods. “But I want us to take it slow.”

“You set the pace,” I assure her. “I want this to work more than I want anything else in my life. So I’ll do whatever you want me to.”

“We’ll see this as a new dalliance,” she adds.

I know this is supposed to be serious so I try hard not to break into laughter. “Okay. I will court you but I won’t ask you to move to an estate in the country. Not right away at least.”

“I’m serious.”

“You sound like Austen.”

She rolls her eyes. “And we can’t tell anyone either.”

“I agree,” I tell her. “And from now on, we talk to each other, alright? I’ll try to make you happy the best way I know how. But if it’s not enough for you, then you need to tell me.”

She nods, but then her graze drops before she asks. “You really do want this right?”

“I told you I want this to work more than anything else in my life.”

“It’s just… when you first told me you wanted to fight for our marriage, I was overwhelmed because it was all so sudden. You told me everything I wanted to hear. Even at that moment, everything in me screamed for us to just fall back into it all the way. But there was also a part of me that thought you were just lonely, and maybe you thought that us getting back together was the answer to it.”

“Not true-”

Emma holds up her hand. “Maybe not true, but it’s my fear. That’s why I kissed Luke that night, because I was desperate. I wanted to push things with him because I knew I’d never love him the way I love you. I knew that if things went to pot, I wouldn’t be half as devastated. But with you? I don’t think I can survive that type of heartbreak again, H. You don’t know how much it killed me to end our marriage. I can’t afford to fall back into something that’s not going to last.”

“Emma,” I reach across the table to take her hand. “I can’t even imagine how hard it was for you. I know for sure it was not a decision you made lightly, nor on a whim. I wish I had fought you on it then… had fought for you then. There was a time when I thought our marriage was over, and I was going to let you go. But I’m not going to do that now. If it takes you weeks, months, hell, Emma… if it takes you years to fully trust my devotion to you, I’m in this for however long it takes.”

Emma nods, biting into her lower lip. I can see her eyes starting to water because every bit of this is overwhelming. She turns her head towards the music floating in from the other room. It’s a Van Morrison cover, Crazy Love.

“Wanna dance?”

The request takes me by surprise since this isn’t like her. But I toss my napkin on the table and move to stand next to her, holding out my hand. The simple delight on her face when her hand slides into mine is everything.

We step out onto the edge of the dance floor. I wrap my arm around her lower back, holding her tight and flush against me. One of her hands rests on my shoulder, playing with the hair at the nape of my neck. The other is clasped in mine just over my heart. We sway, eyes pinned at each other for a few moments.

“Thought you hate dancing?” I smirk.

“Still hate it,” she answers. “I’m just using it as an excuse to be closer to you.”

She sighs, practically sinks into my arms. Emma’s head fits against my chest like she was made to be there. My chin rests against her hair.

“Emma?”

She lifts her head from my chest. “Yeah?”

“You don’t need an excuse.”

She give me love, love, love, love, crazy love… 

***

“What the-”

“Oi!” I yell, quickly pulling the duvet over my wife and I. “Heard of knocking?”

“Heard of a bedroom lock?” Lucy challenges.

Last night, we drove up the M1 straight from the restaurant. We took breaks in deserted services with shiny floors and bad lighting where we had coffees and wandered around WHSmith bulk buying sweets even though it’s really not that far. But you can never have too many travel sweets, can you?

And now, here we are, back at the cottage. The kids are still at their grandparents until this afternoon so Emma and I are enjoying the benefit of having the house all to ourselves by having a morning shag. That is until one of her sisters walks in on us. I’m very aware that I’m still inside Emma.

I pull out, roll over to lay down next to my wife, and we both stare at Lucy who is dressed from head to toe like Princess Jasmine from Aladdin.

“Party?” Emma asks her sister. We both try not to giggle as she sashays in to look at herself in the mirror then perches on the bed in her harem pants. Today, she’s gone heavy on the winged eyeliner and shows off a flat midriff. I quite like the pointy silver shoes though.

“No, Tesco,” she says dryly. “Obviously a party.”

“What are you doing here?” I ask her. 

Lucy glares at me. “What are you doing here? Besides rearranging my sister’s guts, of course.”

I don’t even flinch. I’ve been married to Emma for ten years, I’m used to this sister of hers.

“I’m trying to win your sister back,” I say earnestly. I know that Emma and I talked about keeping this a secret, but she literally walked on us shagging. There’s no point in denying it. It’s best that she knows my true intention rather than thinking we’re divorced with benefits.

“Eh, about time,” she replies nonchalantly.

“Luce, please keep this to yourself for now,” Emma begs her. “This is still new.”

“I will,” she nods. “Just a friendly reminder, though, Styles. If you hurt my sister again, I won’t even think twice before starting a business selling voodoo dolls of you. Bet I could make a fortune of that.”

In their girl gang, Lucy is the wildcard, the likeliest to carry a shank. I don’t even laugh because she could be serious. 

“Duly noted.”

“What are you doing here this early?” Emma asks her sister.

“I wanted to ask if I can borrow that giant tiger in George’s room?”

“Feel free to borrow the rug in the front room as well,” I cackle.

“Ooh yeah,” Emma chirps. “Are you going to find a whole new world?”

“Have you got your Aladdin?”

She pulls a face at our mocking. “My mate who’s supposed to be Aladdin is sick so I asked Jamie to fill in and he agreed because he owed me a big favour. But this lot changed their mind and wanted a genie so now I have to go to Jamie’s and convince him to let me do a full blue body paint on him.”

Emma and I roar with laughter. “Please, please, please, take some piccies.” 

***

A month later…

I can only imagine the joy on my children’s faces when they open the door. I’ll be standing there with the pup in hand, but I know I’m practically vibrating with excitement myself. I glance over at the little dog crate that we’d prepared to transport him in. It’s a sweet, nine-week-old Bernese mountain dog. He’s pretty chill, curled into a round ball, but he’s not sleeping. His eyes are open and alert, as if he’s just waiting to find out what’s around the next corner.

The back of my Range Rover is loaded with two boxes of food, dog toys, bowls, a leash, and appropriate treats. Since I’m still crashing at my mum’s, that will go to her place for when the kids and this puppy come to stay. Emma has an identical list at her home, already purchased and hiding until we hand the puppy off to the kids.

I’ve got a feeling that today is going to be a good day. All morning, Emma and I texted back and forth. Some of it was practical, like making sure we agreed on all the dog rules we’d lay down with the kids tonight. Some of it was lighthearted teasing. Some of it was dirty.

I can’t remember the last time I texted my wife throughout the day just for the hell of it. I had fun with it, and I know without a doubt she had fun with it too. Which made me realise what a twat I’d been for never doing something as simple as letting her know she was on my mind in just such a way. 

Pulling into the drive, I cut my headlights so the kids wouldn’t see me approach. I shut the engine off, quietly get out of my side, and press the door closed quietly. On the other side, I open the passenger door, then spring the latch on the dog crate, and this tiny little puppy totters straight at me with tail wagging.

I lift him in my arms. I shut the door and then move over to the patch of grass. I put the puppy down so he will go potty before I bring him in. When I was a kid, we had a dog called Max, but I sort of grew up with him so I didn’t remember when he was a puppy. And Emma never had a dog before, so we’re sort of winging it with this puppy training thing. But I don’t fret about it. I mean, we’ve had babies, they’re harder than this, surely? 

I patiently wait for this little fella to do his business, which includes a few minutes where he attacks my shoelaces and tugs. Shite, he’s cute. 

Eventually, he sniffs around, tail high and then abruptly squats to pee. I thought boy dogs lift their legs when they pee but maybe not at this age. I immediately bend and give him praise with an upbeat, positive tone that makes him excited. Who’s daddy’s clever little fella? You are! Yes, you are! You did well, mate. That was brilliant! He puts his paws up on my shin, accepting my stretches with tail wagging and tongue lolling out the side of his head. My kids are going to fall in love with this little guy. 

I scoop him up in my arms when he’s done and make my way inside. But instead of entering from the front door, I circle the house so I can enter from the back, knowing they must be all in the kitchen as this is usually the time when the kids would do their homework for next week. Walking past the window, I see that I’m right. Emma is at the kitchen island with George next to her and Minnie on the opposite side. My heart starts beating faster at the thought of spending the day with my family—and apparently our new third child in my arms—and I find it almost shameful I have such excitement over it. Shouldn’t I have always been this excited? Or is it normal for things to just settle, and we take them for granted?

I shake that thought off of my mind. I had this important talk with my wife a couple of weeks ago about how we shouldn’t focus on the past. We’re both committed to repairing our marriage, and for it to work, we both know we must commit to living in the present. Because at the end of the day, the present is all we have.

I knock on the door and as planned, Emma will tell the kids to answer it.

In moments, it’s swinging open. I get a flash of Emma walking up behind our kids, but my eyes are pinned on them. They’re both in complete shock, eyes wide open staring at the puppy squirming in my arms.

Both stare at me mutely, frozen, as if they can’t believe that this is real.

Finally, I say, “surprise!”

Minnie’s gaze rises up to meet mine. “Is that ours?”

“This is ours,” I nod, laughing. But still, neither of them move forwards, so I goad them. “Come and get him?”

That’s all it takes for Minnie to scoop this little fella into her arms, pressing her nose into his head and murmuring little endearments. George scratches him and he reacts to their greetings by wiggling frantically and trying to lick both of my kids’ faces. They both laugh in a delighted way I’ve never quite heard before.

I look at my wife and see her tender smile as she watches our littles. I can tell she’s as charmed by it as I am. 

I walk inside because it’s colder than a witch’s tit outside and shut the door. “He just peed outside, but we need to keep a close eye on him. If he starts sniffing around or circling, that probably means he needs a wee. Scoop him up and take him out to the back. After he’s done with his thing, give him lots of praise and affirmation.”

“Got it,” Minnie says as she plops down on the living room floor with the pup. The puppy jumps around, and all three of them start to play.

“Now, what should we name him?” Emma asks.

“Droolius Caesar?” I joke.

Emma laughs. “Jimmy Chew?”

“Sarah Jessica Barker?” I continue. “Wait, no, it’s a boy. Franz Fur-dinand?”

“Sir Barks-a-Lot?”

“Deputy Dawg?”

“Bark Twain?”

We both laugh. We’re shite at this. The kids are too busy with the puppy to comment on our suggestions.

SpongeBob SquarePants is on the telly playing in the background. None of them are watching, but I see SpongeBob scratching his snail pet under the chin before he picks up said pet and says, “I love you Gary. Gary, Gary, Gary, Gary…”

“Gary,” I say. The kids look at me and I point at the telly.

“That’s a ridiculous name for a dog,” Emma cackles. “But I like it.”

“That’s a human name?” Minnie’s brows knit slightly.

“I like it!” George exclaims, then proceeds to baby talk the pup who’s chewing on the end of Minnie’s braid. “I love you Gary. Gary, Gary, Gary, Gary…”

We laugh.

“H,” Emma calls, and my gaze moves to her. She jerks her chin to the kitchen. “Help me set up the table? I’ve got a cold beer for you.”

Minnie and George still completely ignore us as we move into the kitchen. 

It would be natural for me to sit at the kitchen island while Emma gets the beer and checks on the supper, but the kids can see me from where they sit in the living room. So I follow my wife behind the island instead.

Before she can make it two steps, I move right into the back of her. Hands at her hips, I push her all the way forward until the counter catches her hips, then I dip to put my lips to her neck. 

Emma’s head falls back and she utters the tiniest of sighs, one arm looping back to go around the side of my head so she can thread her fingers in my hair. It’s an intimate embrace, but not one to provoke lust. Just a message that I missed her even though I saw her two days ago, and I love touching her in this gentle, loving way.

“The kids,” she murmurs. “They might see us.”

“Oh, the tragedy,” I whisper dryly. “Our children seeing  their parents hugging.”

Emma snickers and pulls away, glancing over her shoulder. “It would be shocking to them. And until we know for sure what we are and where we’re going, we need to keep them in the dark, remember? I don’t want them to get their hopes up.”

“You’re right,” I mumble in a low voice before moving to the island. I glance back at the living room and see the puppy on George’s back, trying to climb up. “No touching around the kids.”

She smiles and hands me a beer. She’s got one in her hand, and we tap bottles. She then moves to the oven, where she bends to take a peek through the window. Obviously, I stare at her arse as she does.

“It’s done,” she announces, opening the oven to pull the pan of shepherd’s pie.

“Need help with that?’ I ask, noting it looks like it probably weighs fifty pounds.

Twisting, she grins. “Sure. I made a double batch to send you home with some leftovers.”

That gets me. Not only she made one of my favourite meals, but she’s also sending me home with leftovers. I pop off the stool, round the island and take the two potholders she’s holding out to me.

After I carefully lift the pan from the oven, she shuts the oven door. I set it down on the two trivets she’s placed on the counter.

Bending over, I inhale the scent deeply. “Smells fantastic.”

Emma bumps her hip against me. “Well… you’ve been pretty amazing these last few weeks, so…”

I bump her hip back before sliding my hand around her waist. Bending my head, I murmur. “Admit it… it’s for the orgasms I gave you after the school run the other day.”

She chuckles with a sly smile. “Possibly.”

Leaning in closer, I touch my temple on the top of her head, lowering to a complete whisper. “You do know that I can give you that any day you want, right, Em? All you’ve got to do is ask.”

“Oh, I will,” she teases.

“What’s going on here?” Minnie says from behind us.

Emma and I jump apart as if we’d been electrocuted by each other. We spin to see Minnie standing there, with George next to her holding Gary in his arms. These two must have worn that pup out as he is still, watching us curiously.

Minnie’s expression, on the other hand, is condemning and suspicious.

“Nothing’s going on, poppet,” Emma says, her voice a little squeaky in panic. It’s adorable.

“Your mum and I were just talking,” I calmly explain.

“With your arm around her waist and whispering,” Minnie challenges. “Looks more like flirting to me.”

“Are you upset about it?” I challenge back. I knew she was upset when we separated and she struggled with it for a long time. 

Her brows knit together. “I’m just confused.”

Emma’s expression indicates she has no clue what to say. I can’t say I’m any more well equipped, but I’m going to take this one. I give my wife a subtle chin tilt, silently telling her I’ll handle this and relief evident in her eyes.

“Come on, you lot. Help me sort Gary’s stuff,” I say, herding them towards the garage. 

All three of them follow me into the garage, Gary still cosy in George’s arms. 

I immediately spot the stack of supplies, which includes a dog crate similar to mine, as well as bowls, a soft dog bed, food and toys. I pick up the soft bed towards the door that leads back into the house. Minnie turns to precede me, but I stop her. “Hang on there a second, poppet.”

When she pivots to face me her expression is guarded. “You asked about your mum and me. What do you want to know?”

“Were you two flirting with each other just now?” She demands. Crap. She’s nine. She’s not supposed to know that stuff. 

I can’t believe I get a little warm in the face at such a question, but I nod. I know it’s probably too soon to tell them but there’s no point in denying this. Both of my children are smart, and they deserve to know what’s going on. 

Her eyes narrow. “So are you… what… getting back together?”

“Does it mean you’re gonna live with us again, daddy?” George chirps.

“Not yet, nuggets. It’s not that simple.”

“It kind of is,” she replies. “You left for months. You didn’t even come during the summer. Then once she started dating Luke-”

“What’s dating?” George turns to his sister.

“It’s when you like someone and they like you back and you become boyfriend and girlfriend then you go out to eat together and do other stuff,” Minnie explains, then she continues. “Then once she started dating Luke, you’re suddenly coming around more often. And then she told me that Luke wouldn’t come over anymore and now you two are making googly eyes at each other.”

We lapse into silence for a moment. I need to think carefully about what to say next. George beats me. “I think I’m dating someone.”

“You what?” My eyes widen.

“Yeah. I asked Poppy in the playground to be my girlfriend the other day and she said yes. Then after we were done playing on the slides we got hungry so she shared her raisins with me. I also let her take a sip of my Ribena.”

I try hard not to break into laughter but Minnie doesn’t even crack a smile. 

“Okay… so here’s the thing. I was very upset. I know that was wrong of me to just leave without saying goodbye, and it was wrong of me for not visiting sooner. I needed time to let it go, and to accept what your mum wanted. But not once during that time did I not want to come back home. I’ve always wanted my family back.”

“Then what changed?” Minnie asks.

“Your mum and I spent some time apart because we both thought that was the best decision. But we were wrong. Because we realised that we didn’t want to be without each other. So now I’m trying to prove that I’ve changed. That I’m a better man, and I’m ready to be a better husband. The one your mum deserves.”

“See,” Minnie murmurs, her expression filled with confusion. George dips his head and rubs his cheek against Gary’s head, who seems to be on the verge of falling asleep. “I don’t get it. You and mum always seemed to get along great. You never argued. I never understood why you left.”

I move in close to my daughter and brush a lock of hair behind her ear. “A lot of that stuff is private between your mum and I, poppet.”

George asks. “But why can’t you just move in now, daddy?”

“It takes time, mate. Your mum and I need more time to sort ourselves out. But I promise you two that we’re trying our hardest here, okay? We need you both to be patient. Can you do that for us?”

They both nod in unison. Gary blinks twice.

“I can’t wait for us to be family again,” says Minnie.

Grinning, I bend to kiss her head. “Me too, poppet…”

***

Emma

“Gary! This way, Gary!”

Harry and I look at each other across this rather windy hilltop. The kids and Gary are exploring the neighbouring bushes and pathways as we perch ourselves on a rock nearby. We take in the view, the breeze biting at my cheeks.

My husband turns to me. “Tea? I put some whisky in it.”

“Hell, why not.”

Harry pours the tea out and we clink mugs. He brushes his thumb across my nose for no absolute reason. I was born and raised here, but this is something I’ll never tire of: these swooping hills and valleys, infinite skies and bracing breezes. As much as I loved London, I’m glad we’ve traded that life with this simpler one. There is no taxi nor Tube in sight but our kids are somehow a little bouncier and carefree. They’re happy here, and that’s all that matters. 

 “Ey up,” greets Harry at a group of people walking past us. They are obviously tourists as they have no way to respond and one of them is wearing bog standard Reebok Classics.

We hear the kids squeal in the distance and we both smile at each other. Getting that pup was probably one of our best decisions.  

“Do you remember when we first dated?” Asks my husband. “You brought me up here.”

I nod. “I do.”

“The view was decent,” he grins. 

“I know you’re not thinking about the view.”

“I was thinking about what happened when we got to the top of the meadow…”

“That was some decent shag,” I chuckle. “Nowadays, I’d worry about getting ticks on my unmentionables.”

We laugh.

I stare over at my husband taking in the view and sipping tea noisily. He always pauses for a moment on any walk to drink it all in. He rustles in his bag and gets a packet of biscuit out, opening the packaging awkwardly and offering it to me. 

“Did you know that you’re supposed to call it ‘niece’ and not ‘nice’? Apparently, they’re named after the French town.”

“That’s proper pub quiz trivia knowledge right there, Styles,” I tease.

We stay up here for a little while, but since it’ll get dark soon, we start our walk back to the car. The one thing you forget about taking kids up mountains (small hills) is that for all that experience of green space and fresh air, eventually, you will have to bring them down. Despite having an entire packet of biscuit (with a whole lot of why did you bring this one? This is rubbish. You could’ve brought hobnobs), we failed to remember to pack enough snacks and a fine drizzle is now scratching at our faces. It takes George much persuading to keep walking and by the time we return to the car, the sun is dipping behind the clouds and the twilight sits in the air. 

Harry decided it was fine to park in a deserted car park in the middle of nowhere to escape the throngs of regular walkers and tourists but strangely enough, when we get back there, we are one of six parked up.

“Come on, mate. Literally, just to the car. Like twenty more steps,” Harry begs our son to keep on walking. 

“You lied!” He complains. “You said that twenty steps ago.”

“I’ve got Haribo in the car.”

He progresses to a light canter. 

“Where did all these cars come from?” Harry asks as he approaches our motor cautiously.

“Maybe you’re not the only smart one here and people are following your lead.”

A car flashes us. 

I look around at all the cars. People are sat in them. What are they waiting for? You see this sometimes when waiting for the rain to pass or when people decide to eat their lunch in the car. 

Suddenly, I hear a car door open and a gentleman approaches us. His footsteps are low.

I know him. It’s Patrick. He’s our postman, so, yes, we have our very own Postman Pat. It was the first thing that tickled Harry when he found out years ago. And even better, the joke is not lost on Pat. His wife even got him a stuffed black and white cat for his cherry-red van window. I smile at recognising him, as do all of the occupants in our car.

“Emma, Harry, kids. Fancy seeing you here, of all places.”

“We’ve got a new dog and we were just taking him for a walk,” I inform him.

“Oh, lovely. What’s his name?”

“Gary,” the kids say in unison.

“Have you got a dog, Pat?” George asks him.

“No, my wife’s a cat lady. But funny you should mention dogs. This place here, people like to come here for that reason.”

“Gary seemed to like it,” pipes in Harry. “I think it’ll be his favourite.”

“That it is. People come here all the time for walking and with their dogs and other such endeavours.” His face looks slightly ashen at this point, his eyes darting towards the other cars. “And the other sense of the word… I just thought I would mention it as you have the littl’uns and it’s getting darker. I think someone just flashed his lights to warn you.”

Harry and I realise what he means exactly at the same time. “OH!” we say at the same gobsmacked volume. 

“Dogg…ing…” Harry mumbles. “We should-”

“Leave, like definitely leave, like now,” I say finishing his sentence.

The kids appear confused. I look around and shield my eyes. I should shield the children’s eyes. Pat’s wife waves from the passenger seat.

“Give our regards to June,” I say.

“Will do.”

He salutes us and returns to his car. The kids have all the questions. “People come here to look at dogs?” George asks. “Where are the dogs?”

“Get. In. The. Car.” Harry mouths very deliberately.

I slink into the passenger seat. Our eyes dart in different directions trying to divert focus from any of the cars ahead. We’ll be good if Harry doesn’t drive us off a cliff face. He turns on the wipers, the engine roars to a start and he pulls away slowly.

“We could have stayed and seen the dogs,” says George, a little despondently. “Gary would’ve loved to see his mates. Wouldn’t you, Gary?”

I throw a packet of Haribo at him. Harry and I are silent. We’ve just strolled our children and our very young dog into an outdoor sex hotspot. We are terrible parents. 

“Who fancies chips?” Harry says as he changes gear. He finds our littles in the rear-view mirror and studies their faces. “There’s a decent chippy down road.”

There’s a chorus of approval from the back seat. My husband smiles. He then moves his hand over from the gearstick to find mine, fingers interlocked, the sky glowing a thousand different colours.

***

“Are you calling my turkey dry?”

I look over at my older sister Suze in the corner of our family kitchen wondering where on earth she had the courage to come out with a comment like that. Even her husband stops washing up to absorb what his wife just said to our mother. I mean, you think it, but you just douse it in gravy and make do. Such is the joy of white chalky meat like turkey. Why do this now? Now she’ll harp on about the bacon she puts on the breasts and all the goose fat. But it’s Suze. She likes the challenge. I secretly think the only way she believes she can have a relationship with our mother is to spar with her regularly so they at least have one line of communication.

“It was a lovely dinner, Mum. Did you make the mince pies?” Suze winks at me.

I shake my head at her and bring the plate of mince pies through to the living room. Amidst my mother’s wreaths and tinsel wrapped around the lampshades, it’s a familiar tableau: Pop, my grandfather, asleep in the armchair in the corner, a holy green paper hat covering his eyes. Small children crawl on the floor and make angel shapes with their bodies amidst remnants of old glittery wrapping paper.  I hope Mum’s made a trifle. My other sister Meg and her husband snooze on a neighbouring sofa, catching on much needed sleep since they just had a baby four months ago and I still remember four months sleep regression is hell. I like this part of Christmas where bits of old crackers litter the floor and twilight takes over.

I take a mince pie and escape to the last vacant spot on the sofa. George rests his head on my knees. “What are you eating, mummy?” I look down at his bright green eyes and wonder how he can still be hungry as he must be ninety per cent roast potato at this point.

“A mince pie.”

“With cow mince?”

“No, like fruity bits,” I pick out said fruity bits and drop them into his mouth like a baby bird. He pulls a face, tasting it, and then walks away.

Harry smiles at me from the bottom of the Christmas tree. He’s laying down on the floor with one of my nieces. He’s always been great with kids, long even before we have our own. My niece has her palm out, and Harry runs circles in it as he sings, “round and round the garden, like a teddy bear…”

She smiles and laughs, poising her fingers, ready to bounce. 

“One step, two-step, tickle me under there,” he pretends to collapse into giggles and my niece’s little face broadens into laughter before she rolls over and walks away to play with her cousins.

Finishing my last bite of the tiny pie, I roll under the tree to join my husband. He looks at me as I cosy up next to him, the lights reflect off his eyes.

My mother likes a real tree for Christmas. It’s the smell, you can’t beat the smell. I like to think you can get that real pine smell from a good supermarket brand toilet cleaner but I don’t say that out loud for fear of incurring her festive wrath. And so there’s always a real tree and like we endured when my siblings and I were teens, there’s still a daily rota of vacuuming up the needles as we watch that bastard go crusty and brown as it’s shoved up against the radiator. 

We lay there in silence, looking up at the branches and my mother’s multicoloured lights twinkling in some erratic fashion that my eyes can’t quite handle. I’ve been to raves that were less of an assault on the senses. It’s an overwhelming memory of our childhood, lying in silence wigging out on mum’s trippy disco lights, absorbing the magic of the season. 

“You’re drunk aren’t you, tipsy-tits?”

“You were the one who poured double shots of Baileys in our coffees this morning,” I cackle.

“That’s called Christmas milk.” 

“What are you doing here?” Minnie asks, her head nestling into my shoulder. I rake pine needles from her head.

“Nothing…” Harry replies. “Where’s yer brother?”

“Here,” George suddenly appears, rolling under the tree next to his dad to join us.

“Looks like the awesome foursome is back, huh?” Harry grins.

Minnie and George hum in agreement. I can see my babies smiling. 

It’s time.

“Harry?”

“Yeah?” 

I take a deep breath. “Will you come back home with us?”

-

tag list: @gohometoacactus @just-here-to-escape-from-reality @kikisparadise18 @2am-2pm @rogersdirty-louse @harrys-cherriesss @icycoldbeanieweanies @niallbestie3 @peakascum @coucoukayy @awesomebooklover17 @sunflowerryvol6 @stylessugarhigh​ @umadirectioner​ ​

[watchmegetobsessed]

Flatmates - Harry Styles

i listened to kiwi while writing it so i strongly advise to listen to is while reading as well. without any further ado, i present you this flatmate!harry fic with some steamy smut!

word count: ~9k

warning: smut

masterlist

You were desperate to find a place to live, to say the least. You’ve always had trouble remembering deadlines and important dates, and thanks to this charming trait of yours, you successfully missed the deadline of the college dormitory applications. After a day of solid panic you started looking for cheap apartments, but living off campus seemed to be something only rich people could afford. Rents were ridiculously high and you were certain you couldn’t afford to spend thousands of dollars for a room smaller than your pantry back at home. You watched ad after ad, making calls all day for a week straight, but at the end, you always went to bed with the thought that you’ll have to live under a bridge through the first semester of your freshman year.

It was until a friend of yours, Rita, who was mature enough to apply to the dormitory in time called you with the best news you could receive.

“This friend of my future roomie is looking for a flat mate. You gave me his number, maybe you could give him a call and see if the room is still available. Just tell him Kimberly gave you his number, I’m sure he’ll offer you the room on a nicer price.”

“Oh my God, you just saved my life!” you gasped, almost feeling like crying. “I owe you big time, Rita!”

You called right away, not wanting to waste any time and maybe have the room already rented by then. A deep, male voice answered the call in a soothing British accent.

“Harry Styles,” he said in a calm tone.

“Hey! My name is Y/N and I got your number from Kimberly. I’m looking for a place to live from September and I was told you have a room to rent?”

Harry sounded a little hesitant at first, asked a few questions about you to have a better picture of you, but eventually offered the room. You quickly agreed that you’d be able to move in at the end of August. You were thankful you had one less worry about school finally.

August rolled around the corner faster than you expected and in no time, half your life was packed up into boxes and suitcases as you and your dad drove two hours on a Saturday to get you all settled in your new home. Up until this point, you hadn’t seen Harry just yet. Though you did search up his name, but he was the kind to never post about himself, but mostly about guitars, landscapes and animals. His Instagram was dry, no trait of what he looked like or even the slightest hint about himself. There was only one photo that featured the outline of a guy, which makes it clear that the person was fully naked, no trace of any clothes hanging on his body, but it was completely dark, so nothing could be really seen. However the tag on the figure made you think it wasn’t him, so it didn’t matter. His Facebook seemed even sadder, barely any posts, not even a decent profile picture. You were surprised to see there are people who don’t really use social media, but you didn’t take it as a bad sign. Harry must be a private person and you had nothing against that.

“Are you sure it’s a good idea to move in with a guy you’ve never met before?” your dad asks as the two of you are unloading the car in front of the apartment complex. Glancing up you shrug your shoulders with a little excitement, knowing that you are only minutes away from finally seeing the person you are gonna spend your next months living with.

“He sounded like a decent person, and I really don’t have any other choice, dad. Or do you want me to sleep in a park or something?”

“God, no. You really should be more careful about those deadlines next time,” he sighs kissing the top of your head before shutting the back of the car once everything is set on the ground.

“Don’t worry, I already bought a calendar so I can keep better track of everything.”

When you first told your parents that you’d be living with Harry, they didn’t seem to be a fan of the idea, but they realized you weren’t really swimming in options at the moment so they eventually come to peace that their daughter is going to be living with a guy. They didn’t make a big deal out of it, knowing well you were an adult now practically who can make choices for herself.

The two of you manage to bring everything up to the third floor and you ring the doorbell since you don’t have your keys yet. You immediately recognize Harry’s British accent as he calls out a “coming!” from the other side of the door and a few seconds later it opens, revealing him.

Your first thought is that he is tall. Very tall and oh my! How handsome! His green eyes find your gaze and his dimples come out as he smiles at you happily. This man is surely a nice sight, you think to yourself, but you quickly bring yourself back to reality as he takes a look at all the stuff surrounding you.

“Y/N, why didn’t you call me that you were here? I could have helped you!” Taking a step outside he stretches his hand out for your dad. “Nice to meet ya, you must be Mr. Y/L/N. I’m Harry.”

“Nice to meet you,” your dad nods at him shaking his head before Harry grabs a box from the floor himself, holding the door open for you.

“Come on in!”

The three of you quickly bring everything inside from the hallway and you finally have a moment to look around. It’s not a big apartment, but seemingly perfect for two people. Walking in you have a small kitchen on the left and a little dining area on the right with a simple table and four chairs around it. Further inside is the living room, it’s nicely furnished very bright thanks to the large windows across the front door. On the left there’s a door that leads to the bathroom and on the right there’s a small hallway, two doors on each side. The two rooms are exactly the same size, so there was no need to have a discussion about who is getting which room. Not that you were gonna go against Harry when he literally saved your life with letting you stay with him.

The place seems tidy and neat, it’s clear that Harry takes good care of his home and that is for sure a relief.

Your room has a double bed, a desk with a chair, a dresser and a built in little closet. Everything is white or a light beige color, nothing extreme and you already have plans about how you want to decorate it to make it cozier.

“I left two shelves free for you out of the three. I have a few hair products, but I figured you’d need more space,” Harry tells you when you put a smaller box into the bathroom that has all your toiletries.

“Thank you, I appreciate it,” you smile at him.

Your dad sticks around a little longer helping you unpack some of the bigger boxes, then you walk him down to his car before he leaves.

“Please call your mother often. You know how much she worries about you,” he asks as he pulls you into a quick hug.

“Will do.”

“And call us anytime you need help. Two hours is not that far away, I can always come and get you.”

“I’ll be alright, dad, but thank you.”

You watch him climb into the car and he rolls down the windows waving in your way as he leaves from the parking lot. You stand there until he disappears on the corner and then go back up to your apartment.

Harry is sitting in the living room when you get back, some quiet music playing from the Bluetooth speaker as he reads a book. He glances up at you and you flash him a smile closing the door behind you.

“Your dad seemed quite okay with you living with a guy.”

“He had time to get used to it. They’re not that strict though.”

“That’s cool. I was thinking, maybe we could order some food when you’re done unpacking and just get to know each other a little more.”

“That sounds great!” you smile, but can’t ignore how fast your heart is beating in your chest. Harry surely has an effect on you that you’ll need to gain control over if you don’t want to make living together hard for yourself.

It takes quite some time to unpack everything and find the right place for your stuff, you don’t even finish by the time the food arrives so you decide to leave the rest for tomorrow.

The Chinese food is all set on the table when you walk out and Harry is getting two plates for the two of you.

“Settled in?” he asks as you take one of the chairs and he sits across you.

“Not fully, but I’m getting there,” you chuckle as he hands you your order. “Thank you.”

You talk over the food, just getting to know each other and you finally get a better picture of Harry. It’s his third year of college, he is studying music and pedagogy, intending to one day use music as a helping tool for kids who have learning difficulties. He is a big fan of collecting vinyls and quite passionate about trashy rom coms.

“Really?” you chuckle when he mentions how his Netflix queue is filled with romantic movies.

“Guilty pleasure,” he nods smirking.

You tell a little about yourself too and he seems genuinely interested, which feels nice. You would have hated if he found your interests boring and negligible, but that’s not the case.

“How come you couldn’t find a roommate for so long?” you ask the question that’s been in the back of your mind for quite a while now. Both of you are done eating and you’re cleaning up the table.

Nothing really stood out about Harry just yet, it’s quite a mystery for you why he couldn’t find someone to live with him.

“Well, you could say I’m a little picky in this field. Lived with my best mate first year, and though I absolutely love him, he was horrible to live with. Felt like his personal maid the whole time. When Niall moved in with his girlfriend and I had to move on my own I promised myself I would choose carefully. Lived with a PhD student last year, he was pretty great, but he moved out when he graduated, and I couldn’t really find someone I liked since then.”

“Glad I passed then,” you chuckle as you take the dishes and start washing them while Harry stands next to you, leaning against the edge of the counter.

“You seemed like a decent person to live with, I hope I won’t be wrong about that,” he chuckles, but you can tell he is still a little scared you might turn out to be a total asshole.

“Don’t worry, I won’t be too much trouble. I’m quiet like a mouse and clean up after myself.”

“That’s all that matters,” he smiles. “Alright, I have some things to finish, I’ll be in my room if you need help with anything.”

“Thank you, Harry.”

He waves in your way before disappearing in his bedroom.

You spend most of your Sunday unpacking what was left and running errands, buying groceries so you don’t have to go to the store every other day during the week. You occasionally meet Harry in the kitchen or the living room, but you both just do your own thing and it’s totally fine by you.

School starts quiet smoothly, Harry was kind enough to give you a rundown of where you’ll find your lecture halls so you don’t really get lost around campus, easily finding your way.

Friday afternoon you and Rita are sitting at a café near campus to discuss the first week of school. You don’t have any classes together, so only grabbed lunch two times all week, but didn’t have more than twenty minutes together before one of you had to run to a class. Now you are both comfortably sat in a booth with two cappuccinos and plenty of time to talk.

“So, how is living with Harry?” she curiously asks.

“He is great! Though we don’t meet that much. He has a band so he has practice three times a week, spends the rest of his time at home reading or watching TV.”

You ate dinner together twice this week, but you haven’t really had the courage to join him in the living room when he was watching TV. It sounds stupid but you figured maybe it would bother him if you were out there with him. And since he didn’t invite you either, you just stayed in your room mostly.

“Kimberly told me he is hot, is that true?” she asks with a smirk as she takes a sip from her hot drink. You immediately feel your cheeks heating up.

“Well, he surely is a good looking guy,” you breathe out.

“Lucky you! There’s not much of those in an all girls dorm,” she pouts and you chuckle. “So are you gonna make a move on him?”

“That’s not gonna happen,” you shake your head laughing.

“Why not?”

“Because we live together and if he rejects me that would be so awkward for the rest of our time living together.”

“But you can’t know for sure if he would reject,” she points out, but she can’t bring up one thing that would change your mind.

“It’s better not to take the odds. I don’t want to end up on the street.”

 As the days go by, things start to get busier in your everydays. Assignments and papers start to pile up so you have to start working on them if you don’t want to leave everything to the last moment. You become a regular in the library, the atmosphere is great for you to get into the flow and get a lot of work done.

It seems like Harry is in the same shoe, he is often in and out of the apartment, sometimes only spends home just a couple of minutes before he leaves again. However they slowly get accustomed to each other, learn the ways the other likes things and work up a schedule for things. Harry learns that Y/N likes to take a shower twice a day and washes her hair usually on Wednesdays and Sundays, so he doesn’t try to take too much time in the bathroom on those days. He also notices how she doesn’t have time to wash the dishes after herself on Thursdays when she just runs home to have a quick bite before she has to leave for another lecture, so they came to a silent agreement where Harry cleans up after her on Thursdays while she takes up on the dishes on Saturday when Harry leaves to band practice at eight.

They work well together and soon enough all of Harry’s doubts about Y/N fade into nothing and he realizes he has made the right choice with her.

Usually she stays at the library until seven on Mondays, but this week they are closing early because they are rearranging a whole department, so Y/N leaves a little after five. She pays a quick trip to the grocery store before she heads home. Opening up the door she immediately hears the music playing, one of Harry’s vinyls is twirling around in the record player and she hears the water running in the bathroom. Setting her bags on the counter she starts unpacking the groceries.

The music and the running water pushed the sound of her arriving down, Harry didn't realize that you were home early when he opens the bathroom door, singing to himself wearing absolutely nothing as he wants to go and grab a pair of clean underwear, but he is shocked to see you standing in the kitchen.

“Shit!” he snaps, hands immediately flying to cover himself as he sprints back to the bathroom quickly grabbing a towel to wrap around his waist.

Your cheeks are heating up immediately even though you didn’t see anything you weren’t supposed to, the counter top covered him just right above the critical line, but it’s the first time you’ve seen his upper body completely naked.

Even though it was just a spit second, the sight of his many tattoos and the defined V-line leading down to his crotch burned straight into your mind, leaving you flustered and shy all of a sudden.

“Sorry! I should have let you know I was coming home early!” you call out turning around, as if he was about to walk out naked again. Harry chuckles lightly as he returns, this time a towel wrapped around his waist.

“Don’t be silly, you don’t have to check in when you come home. It was my fault, I shouldn’t just walk around naked assuming you wouldn’t be home.”

You should, you think to yourself gulping as you turn around and dare to look at him again. You don’t see less than just a few seconds ago, his chest is glistening from the dampness, his curls are still wet and you are having a hard time not to stare at the tattoos on his lower stomach, so you busy yourself with the rest of your groceries as he walks into his room and returns in a pair of sweats and a white t-shirt.

“Any plans for the weekend?” he asks disappearing in the bathroom, but he leaves the door open and you hear him shuffle around, probably fixing up his hair. He uses some kind of mousse that keeps his curls perfectly and also happens to smell like mango and some kind of citrus.

“Um, not really.”

“We’re playing at this bar with the band, wanna come and watch us?” Walking out of the bathroom he switches the light off before walking to the couch and opening up his Netflix account on the TV. His invitation surprises you, but it also feels nice he wants you there.

“Oh, sounds fun! Can I bring someone?”

“Of course! I can have a table reserved for you, if you’d like,” he smiles at you before turning his attention to the screen.

“That would be great, thanks.”

You feel like after your little encounter it’s probably not the best day to join him at the TV, especially because you can’t stop yourself from blushing every time you look at him. The sight of his naked torso pops up in your mind every time and there’s no way you can just casually sit on the couch with him without your body lighting up on fire.

 Rita is excited when you tell her about the invitation, you don’t even have to convince her to go with you since she is dying to finally meet Harry. When he leaves in the early afternoon on Saturday he assures you that there’s gonna be a table reserved under your name, and off he goes to practice, leaving you alone for the rest of the day since he tells you he won’t be back before the concert tonight. Rita comes over around six and the two of you get ready together.

“You have to wear something spicy,” she wiggles her eyebrows at you while you sit at your desk applying mascara to your lashes.

“I don’t want to overdress, it’s just a bar.”

“Yeah, but Harry invited you. I bet he wants you to see him play.”

“Of course he wants, why else would he invite me?” you ask with furrowed eyebrows.

“You don’t get it,” she chuckles turning to you, hands on her hips. “He wants you to see him play because it feeds his ego. Maybe even turns him on.”

“Stop acting like there is anything between us. We are flatmates and that’s all.”

“I think he wants to be more, you’re just too pussy to make a move yourself,” she shrugs turning back to your closet.

“Stop calling me a pussy for not wanting to make it awkward for the two of us to live together. I’m pretty sure Harry doesn’t see me as anything more than just the person he lives with.”

“Then we have to change that. And I think this is the perfect dress for that.”

Rita pulls out a little black dress you bought about a year ago, but never really got around to wear it. It’s so tight, pushes your tits up way too much for your liking, you’re not even sure why you bought it in the first place.

“I’m not wearing that,” you shake your head.

“Are you afraid he might get a boner from you in it?”

“Rita!” you snap at her, but she just chuckles.

“Look, if you’re so sure he doesn’t want you like that, why does it matter what you wear?”

She has a point. It’s not like this dress will change anything and it would be nice to wear at least once in your life this stupid dress if you bought it.

Grabbing it from her hands you throw it to the bed and start undressing as she claps in victory.

You remembered right, the dress leaves close to nothing to the imagination when it comes to your figure. The fabric hugs your figure tightly, and you put on a lacy bralette that peeks out at the top of the dress, kind of covering some more from your skin, since the dress doesn’t do much in that field itself. Rita tries to convince you not to take a jacket, but you throw your denim jacket on, feeling the need to have something give you the slightest sense of being covered.

You arrive at the bar twenty minutes before the concert starts and it’s a good thing Harry reserved a table for you, because the place is packed. You’re not sure if it’s because of them or it’s just a regular Saturday evening.

The little stage is all set up, but you see no sign of Harry anywhere as the two of you settle at your table with a drink. Luckily, the bartender did not ask for an ID, he was too busy looking at your chest. At least there’s one good thing in this dress.

The drum set at the back has the name of the band on it and you smile reading it. The word ‘Stylish’ is printed on it with bold blue letters, referring to Harry’s last name, who is most likely the front man of the band.

The place is buzzing and the two of you enjoy being out at a bar concert. When the lights go down you finally spot him walking out of the back followed by a guy and two girls.

“Welcome, folks,” he greets the audience, his accent filling up the place over the chatters. A round of cheering answers him, making him smile. “Thank you for coming out tonight, we hope to entertain you in the next hour. Our name is Stylish and now let’s get down to business,” he smirks and just as he takes a step back from the mic, the band starts playing. Harry grabs a guitar himself before stepping back to the mic and then he starts singing.

They play a mixture of covers and original songs, the transition between them is so smooth you sometimes forget it’s a whole different song that’s playing. Harry is clearly enjoying the spotlight, his presence on the stage is so natural and capturing, you often catch yourself forgetting about the rest of the band.

One song follows the other and you don’t even realize how fast this hour passes by. Harry sometimes stops in-between songs, entertaining the audience with small jokes and just casually interacting with them.

“Our last song is up next, so let me take a moment to introduce the band,” Harry speaks into the mic while softly playing the guitar so it’s not completely quiet as he talks. “At the drums, the amazing and talented Sarah Jones!”

A round of applause fills the bar as Sara waves around smiling widely, before Harry moves on to the next member.

“Playing the piano, the wonderful Charlotte Clark!”

Charlotte plays a short melody on the keys matching up with what Harry has been playing, before she also waves at the audience.

“The guy who is a way better guitarist than me, Mitch Rowland.”

Harry’s comment makes the audience laugh and Mitch just nods shyly, a smile pulling on his lips under his mustache.

“And this handsome Brit who sometimes acts like a comedian,” Sarah starts leaning closer to her mic. “Harry Styles.”

It’s no surprise that Harry gets the biggest cheering and he smirks sweetly, his fingers still strumming on the guitar. The clapping and screaming slowly dies down and as Harry steps back to his mic they start the last song.

It’s quite an upbeat, funky song, you just can’t resist dancing around on your chair and seemingly Rita is enjoying herself as well, cheering with her beer in her hand. The song comes to an end and they all line up at the front of the stage bowing down together as the whole bar cheers on them as one person.

“Woah, this was… something else,” Rita breathes out once they disappear at the back and chatter fills up the place once again and the lights come back.

“They smashed it!” you nod in agreement. You figured they are good if they get asked to perform, but this was way beyond what you were expecting.

Looking around you are hoping to see Harry somewhere, but they must be celebrating somewhere at the back. Maybe he won’t even come out, you think to yourself as you finish up your beer.

“I’ll get us another round,” you tell Rita as you make your way to the bar.

There are quite a few people waiting to be served, so you squeeze yourself into the crowd and hope to get to the front soon.

“So how did you like it?”

You jump in surprise when you hear Harry’s voice coming from behind you, and turning around you see how close he is standing to you.

“Hi! I didn’t even see you sneak up on me,” you chuckle making him smile as he squeezes himself next to you. The two of you finally reach the front, but the bartender is serving someone a little on the left so you have to wait. “I loved it, you were like a proper rockstar up there!”

“Thanks,” he chuckles and his dimples show up on his cheeks. The bartender finally gets to you and Harry is quick to order for the both of you. “’S probably better if I place the order since you’re not twenty one just yet.”

“Didn’t have any problem ordering the first time,” you smirk smugly and Harry raises his eyebrows at you before his eyes wander down your body for a second.

“I bet you didn’t in this dress.”

Suddenly, you’re very aware of how daring your outfit looks, so out of reflex, you pull your jacket tighter on yourself, Harry’s smile quickly fades as he realizes that he made you uncomfortable with his comment.

“I meant that you look really pretty. Definitely makes you appear a little older though.”

“My friend wanted me to wear it, I would have been fine with something else,” you admit as the bartender places your order in front of you and Harry pays for the whole thing.

“Glad she convinced you,” he grins down at you and you can feel your cheeks heating up once again.

He helps you carry the drinks to the table and Rita quickly puts her phone away when she sees who you are returning with.

“Harry, this is my friend, Rita. Rita, this is Harry,” you introduce them and Harry shakes her head smiling.

“Nice to meet you,” he nods kindly.

“Oh, same goes for you,” Rita smirks and you roll your eyes at her.

“I’ll go get the rest of the band, do you mind if we join you guys here? There are no empty tables.”

“Sure,” you nod smiling before the crowd swallows Harry.

“For fuck’s sake, you have to make a move on him, Y/N!” Rita turns to you as soon as he is gone.

“Would you stop?” you chuckle.

“No! This dude is so hot I forget my name when I look at him! And you live with him! You can’t miss this chance, Y/N.”

“I’m not missing anything. We live together, it’s not worth it.”

“Not missing anything?” Rita looks at you as if you were mental. “You are literally missing everything!”

“I’m done with this conversation,” you tell him just when Harry appears again, this time with two of his bandmates, Sarah and Mitch are following him smiling, hand in hand.

“Charlotte had to leave early, but this is Sarah and Mitch,” Harry introduces them as they join the two of you at the table. “And this is my flatmate, Y/N and her friend Rita.”

You all shake hands as Harry sorts out the extra beers he has ordered so everyone has a drink on their hand.

It’s no surprise, but Sarah and Mitch prove themselves to be just as cool as they seemed up on the stage. And the best thing is that they don’t shy away from sharing funny stories that include Harry.

“So have you been looking for a new place to stay, Y/N?” Mitch jokes. “I’m sure you’ve had enough of Harry by now.”

“Very funny,” Harry laughs at his bandmate’s comment.

“To be honest it’s pretty fine so far. He is a pleasant person to share your home with,” you say with a soft chuckle.

“What’s one thing you hate about living with him?” Sarah asks and Harry pretends to be hurt over the question.

“Who said there’s anything she hates?”

“Shush, I was asking her!” she hushes at him making you laugh.

“I really can’t point out anything in particular. Maybe he has been very careful, luring me into believing that he is the perfect flatmate so I get stuck with him.”

You stay for a while, just chatting and having a good time until the bar starts to empty out and you decide it’s better if you head home as well.

“We have to take care of the equipment, are you leaving or do you want to wait for me?” Harry asks you.

“We’ll just call an Uber, don’t worry about it,” you smile at him.

“Alright, see you at home.”

You say goodbye to Sarah and Mitch and part your ways with them as you and Rite head outside.

“I hope you noticed how Harry was looking at you,” Rita smirks at you when the two of you are sitting at the back of the Uber.

“What are you talking about?” you sigh leaning your head against the seat.

“I caught him staring at you quite a few times.”

“He was just probably looking at me when I was talking. Don’t try to talk something into it that’s not true.”

“Alright, I’ll stop,” she replies holding up her hands. “But I still think you are missing out on some amazing dick.”

You awkwardly glance at the driver who is hearing everything you say, but Rita seemingly doesn’t mind that you’re not alone.

“You know what? We should give Tinder a try.”

“What? Why?”

“If you don’t want to make a move on your hot flatmate, we need to get some satisfaction from others.”

“I’m fine, thanks.”

“Oh, you are not,” she chuckles. “But you will be when you match with the hottest guys on campus.”

You let Rita believe that she convinced you to sign up for Tinder, but you get out of the car with the intention of never downloading the app, like ever.

Walking into the apartment you grab a clean, oversized t-shirt and a pair of panties since your sleeping shorts are all dirty, but you were planning to do the laundry tomorrow. You decide it’s not a big deal and the shirt will probably cover enough of your body.

You take a quick shower to get off the thick smell of the bar that’s stuck on your skin, taking your time moisturizing yourself once you’re done. When you get dressed you see that the shirt does cover your bum, but if you lifted your arms up it surely shows a big portion of your ass, so you’ll have to be careful if Harry arrives.

You’re lounging on the couch watching a rerun of House M.D. and scrolling through your phone when Harry arrives.

“Hey there, rockstar!” you greet him teasingly and he just chuckles shyly.

“Is it gonna be my new nickname?”

“Well, you really were one tonight, so I think yes,” you nod making him laugh. Walking further inside his eyes stop on your bare legs and he is quick to notice that you’re not wearing any pants, like you usually do. You immediately tug on the end of the shirt to cover more of your skin, but it’s not really working.

“Ehm, I’ll go and take a quick shower,” he informs you before disappearing in his room first and then rushing into the bathroom.

Looking down at your attire you decide it’ll be better if you threw on some sweats. Harry clearly got a little uncomfortable seeing you so bare, so it’s better to cover up. You’ll just take them off when you go to bed.

Harry doesn’t take too long in there, and when he joins you on the couch you are pretty sure he took a cold shower since no steam followed him when he left the bathroom. His eyes flicker to your now covered legs, but he doesn’t say anything, just makes himself comfortable next to you.

“You like it?” he asks nodding at the TV.

“Yeah, he is such an asshole, but it’s funny,” you huff. “Hey, I took a few pictures tonight. Wanna see if you like any of them?”

“Sure,” he nods pushing himself up a little as you unlock your phone and show him the photos you took of him and the band while performing.

Some of them ended up really cool, you were able to catch the lights and their movements just the right way, especially one stands out where he was holding out a note, basically screaming into the mic, he really looks like a rockstar on that one.

“Can you send me this one?”

“Done,” you smile at him and glancing over you see that he opens the Instagram app on his phone. You watch him crop and adjust it a little bit, then tag his bandmates and finally, he posts it.

“Wow, this is the first picture on your page with you actually on it,” you tease him.

“So you’ve been stalking my profile?” he smirks at you.

“I wanted to check you out before I moved in, but your social media was no help in that.”

“Yeah, I’m not a fan of posting that much, but this was a cool picture.”

“It’s an honor to know that I took the first one featuring you.”

“Actually, this is the second one, but it is the first one where my face is visible,” Harry tells you before turning his attention back to the TV, but the gears start to turn wildly in your mind, trying to remember which picture could be the other one.

Later, when you’re lying in your bed with your door closed, you pull up his profile and stat scrolling down. Most of the pictures fall out, because they have absolutely no trace of any human being on them. But then you stop at the one that features a black silhouette of a man, the one you thought wasn’t him.

Opening up you tap on the tag and see that it leads to Mitch’s profile, but now that you’ve met him, you’re pretty sure it’s not him in the picture. So you take a closer look and as you go over the small details, like the line of his neck, how wide his shoulders are and the untamed curls, you soon realize that it is indeed Harry in the photo.

You push down a moan when realization sets in, because that means that you’re staring at the naked silhouette of Harry and it immediately starts a fire between your legs.

“Jesus,” you whisper as you let yourself stare at the photo a little longer. You weren’t expecting it, but it’s surely making you feel some kind of way.

Locking your phone you throw it to your nightstand before you bury your head into your pillow. You have to press your thighs together quite tightly to make the throbbing sensation stop so you can finally fall asleep. Well, it takes some time before that happens and it’s quite torturous.

  Unlike how you planned, Rita finally gets you to download Tinder and give it a try. She helps you set up your profile, and though at first it feels incredibly awkward, you slowly adjust to being out there on the virtual market.

You start swiping left and right whenever you are bored during classes or you’re having a break from studying. Your matches start to pile up and soon enough you start getting messages as well. You reply to the ones you like or find funny and creative, giving them a chance, but not many end up going too far. Somehow the conversations always die down and you lose interest in the person.

Only one guy gets as far as asking you out and getting a yes as an answer. Jordan is a physics major and seemed like a nice and funny guy through the messages, good-looking too, so you decided to give it a go.

So Friday evening you dolled yourself up, put on a nice blouse with your favorite skinny jeans and black heels, ready to head out to your first ever Tinder date.

As you walk out of your room you find Harry in the kitchen in his basketball shorts and a simple black t-shirt making himself a cup of tea. The shorts are hanging low on his waist and as he reaches up to get the hones from the cupboard you get a glimpse of the soft skin on his lower waist. You quickly look away before you could have any further thoughts about what else is under the waistband of his shorts.

“Oh, where are you heading all dressed up?” he asks, eyebrows raised.

“I actually have a date,” you admit nervously as you grab your keys and put it away in your purse.

“Lucky guy,” he smiles and you can feel your cheeks heating up again. There’s just something in the way he compliments you, it makes your knees go jelly.

“Thanks. I’ll see you later? I’m not sure when I’ll be back,” you tell him grabbing your jacket from the hanger next to the front door.

“Have fun,” he nods before you walk out.

 Jordan proves himself to be quite frankly the same guy you got to know through messages. He takes you to this Mexican themed bar and you are just chatting over some exciting looking cocktails, but you find yourself zoning out sometimes.

What is Harry doing right now? Is he staying at home? I should have asked if he had any plans. Maybe he is hooking up with someone right now.

You find yourself thinking about way more than you probably should and it’s making you lose your shit. So maybe this is why, or because Rita told you to just go with the flow, but when Jordan asks if you want to go up to his place you say yes.

It’s as awkward and bad as you were expecting, unfortunately. There’s a reason why you don’t hook up with every random guy you go out with once. You are totally on different pages, but when you are lying under him on his bed, you just know there’s no way out.

It’s not that he forces you, because you’re sure he would have stopped if you asked, but it would be so awkward to just walk out because you weren’t feeling the vibe. So at least one of you should enjoy it.

You should deserve an Oscar for that orgasm you fake, it’s so believable. Jordan doesn’t seem to notice that you felt absolutely nothing, just frustration and impatience, he tries to make you stay the night, but you save yourself with a lie that you have to wake up early in the morning so it’s best if you head home.

Your frustration just grows on your way home. You were really hoping to get laid tonight, so maybe that could stop you from fantasizing about Harry, because your thoughts have been wild since you found out that he is the one on that Instagram picture. It doesn’t help that he has been walking around shirtless quite a lot.

Shameful or not, you even touched yourself once thinking about him. You were home alone after a particularly boring day so you thought you’d just get yourself off. Before you could realize where your thoughts have wandered, you were moaning his name as you came hard. You couldn’t look into his eyes that day when he came home, he probably thought you were nuts, basically running away from him.

It’s almost midnight when you get back home, you were expecting Harry to be asleep by now since he has band practice in the morning, but you are surprised to see light coming from his room. As you close the front door, kicking your heels off he walks out, of course, without a shirt, his glorious body on full display.

“Hey, how was your date?” he asks as you step to the fridge to get yourself something to drink. You’ve been so damn thirsty since Jordan was… done with you, you could have asked for some water at least, but you just wanted to leave as fast as possible.

“Ugh, don’t even ask,” you whine, leaning against the counter.

“That bad?”

“Worse,” you roll your eyes and Harry chuckles softly.

“Come on, it couldn’t be that bad if you came home so late.”

“Well, it did start off nice, but I shouldn’t have said yes when he asked if I wanted to go to his place.”

“Oh.”

“Worst sex of my life, I wanted out the moment we arrived, to be honest,” you honestly say, feeling a little weird that you’re talking to Harry about it, but you just want to get it off your chest.

“Then why didn’t you just leave?”

“Dunno, I just… I was hoping for just a little satisfaction, but I guess I asked for too much,” you sigh finishing up your water and you walk past him with the intention to grab your pajamas and have a shower that would wash away the happenings of the night, but Harry’s voice stops you.

“Not everything is lost just yet.” Turning around you give him a puzzled look.

“What’s that supposed to mean?”

He bites into his bottom lip and lets his eyes travel down your body, his intent gaze sends a shiver down your spine. When his eyes return to your gaze your heart is wildly beating against your chest.

“I mean that… I can make you feel good, if you want.”

Your mouth hangs open and your eyebrows shoot up at the blunt offer he just made. At first you’re not even sure you heard him right, but as you replay his words you realize that you indeed heard him crystal clear.

“Are you messing with me right now?” you ask, feeling like it’s all just a joke. He did not just offer to satisfy you because you complained to him about how bad your date was.

Harry takes a few steps closer to you, a small smirk tugging on his lips.

“Not really. You want to get off and I would love to be the one to help you with it.”

“But… we live together,” you say and realize how stupid this just sounded, but you hope he gets what you were trying to say.

“So? Does that mean we can’t fuck?”

The way he said that makes your legs go weak for sure. You’ve been fantasizing about things similar to this, but those were nowhere near to actually hear him propose the idea of fucking.

“But… it’ll be weird, won’t it?”

“Only if we make it.”

He walks closer, closing the distance between the two of you and he cups your cheek in his hand as his eyes flicker down to your lips.

“Harry…” you breathe out, but you already know you gave in. There’s no way you can say him no, not after weeks of dreaming about the exact same thing.

“Just stop thinking,” he tells you before pressing his lips against yours.

He kisses you hard and you gladly let his tongue push into your mouth within a second, kissing him back with the same passion. You wrap your arms around his neck as his hands travel down on your sides until they reach your ass and they give it a bold squeeze, making you moan into his lips. You feel him grin as his hands move over to your thighs and he urges you to jump and so you do, wrapping your legs around his waist.

Though you keep your eyes closed, kissing him hard, you can tell he brings you to the couch, laying you down to your back, holding himself up above you. He starts kissing down your jawline and neck, sucking and biting on the sensitive skin. His hands grab the hem of your shirt and you lift yourself up a bit so he can pull it off, throwing it away to somewhere behind the couch. While his lips are sucking on your breasts wherever they are bulging out from the lacy bra, his hands work fast on your jeans, undoing the button and the zipper, tugging them down until you can just kick them right off.

“Matching set? You were really counting on having a good time tonight,” he mumbles against your tummy as he kisses his way down on your body.

His right hand reaches up and cups your breast before it slides under you and easily unclasps your bra. You quickly slide the straps off and throw it to the side, so now you are lying under him only in your panties, whimpering and panting at every kiss he leaves on your body.

“What do you want, Y/N?” he hums glancing up at you, sitting between your legs as he slides just one finger over your soaking wet panties, running it along your throbbing center.

“Fuck, I want you,” you breathe out.

“How exactly do you want me?”

“Jesus, just eat me out, Harry!” you shamelessly moan and he smugly smirks before he hooks his fingers into your panties and pulls them down, throwing it to the ground.

Now you’re lying completely naked in front of him, and he pushes your knees farther apart, looking down at you with lustful eyes.

“You have no idea how long I’ve been wanting to do this,” he growls as he gets closer and without a warning, he licks into you.

You moan in sensation as he starts sucking on your clit, his tongue working perfectly against your bud. Your hands find their way into his hair and you grab a handful of it in each. Oh, how many times you’ve thought about doing this!

“Harry!” you cry out when you feel him push a finger into you, slowly pumping it in and out a few times before he adds another to it. He quickly picks up his pace as he keeps sucking on your clit, getting you closer to your orgasm with every lick.

“Fuck, I’m so close!” you moan, your chest rising and falling rapidly as you struggle to even breathe.

“Cum for me, baby,” he mumbles against your wet clit and just a few more pumps later you came, screaming his name.

“Fucking hell, Harry!” you breathe out when he climbs up on you smirking.

“You think you can handle another one?” he asks, pecking your lips softly. Looking down you see how hard he is and even if you were on the verge of dying you would have said yes. There’s no way you let him get up from this couch unsatisfied after the orgasm he just gave you.

Instead of saying anything, you push on him until he is sitting on the couch and you have your knees on his sides.

“I think you are a little overdressed, aren’t you?” you ask teasingly as you bring a hand down to his erection, cupping it through his shorts and underwear.

Harry cranes his neck so his lips could meet yours again as he lifts his hips up, pushing his shorts down along with his boxers. You sit back down to his lap and his erection presses against your wet folds making you moan into his mouth.

“Do you want me to suck you off?” you ask breathlessly, but Harry shakes his head.

“I would last, I just want to fuck you,” he growls and you swear to God that was the hottest thing you’ve ever heard.

“Condom, we need a condom,” you tell him, still kissing his lips.

You get off him and he quickly runs into his room, shortly returning with a condom between his teeth. He rips the package on his way and falls back to the couch, rolling it on carefully. When he is done you swing your leg over him and get on top again, holding onto his broad shoulders. He grabs the base of his cock and lines himself up to your center and you give yourself a moment to admire his naked beauty right in front of you.

You look into his sparkling eyes and leaning down you kiss him hard as you slowly ease down to his length, his cock slowly filling you up fully.

“Oh fuck!” he moans at the feeling of you around him. His fingers dig deep into your waist as you stay still for a few moments, adjusting to his length. “You alright?” he asks breathlessly. Your eyes meet his and you nod a little before you start moving.

It takes a few moments to find the right pace and get yourself comfortable, but when you finally do, you just can’t stop. His hands are on your ass as he guides your hips a little and you feel the rings on his fingers against your heated skin. He buries his face into your neck nibbling and kissing on the soft skin wherever he reaches.

“Fuck, you look so fucking hot, Y/N,” he grunts when you let your head fall back, feeling your orgasm slowly building up again.

“Harry, I’m gonna cum again,” you pant, picking up a faster pace, desperate for release.

“Cum for me, baby. Let me make you feel good!” he moans wrapping his arms around you as he holds you still, stopping you from moving, but instead he starts thrusting into you, his cock buries so deep into your pussy, your eyes roll back into your head from the feeling.

“Yes! Don’t fucking stop!” you scream as he keeps fucking you hard.

It doesn’t take too long until you fall completely apart and cum again, your legs basically turning into jelly. Just a few thrusts later Harry cums as well, thrusting deep into you a few more times as he moans into your neck.

You lie completely numb on him, his fingers gently stroking your naked back as you try to come back to reality. When you lean back and your eyes meet again you are still speechless.

“I’ve literally wanted it since the day you walked into this place,” he admits with a soft chuckle.

“Really?” you giggle shyly.

“Oh, really. Seeing you around, sometimes without a bra under your shirt completely killed me most of the time.”

Your cheeks are heating up, you didn’t think he noticed when you weren’t wearing a bra.

“Don’t be so shy, you have amazing tits, you are not allowed to wear a bra anymore around here,” he teases you grinning as you laugh and leaning down you kiss him shortly.

“I had quite a few fantasies about you too,” you admit making him raise his eyebrows.

“Really?”

“Mhm, especially after you walked out of the bathroom naked, even though I didn’t even see your dick then.”

Harry chuckles lightly as he pushes his hair back from his forehead, resting his head against the back of the couch.

“So…” you shyly start, ”what now?”

“What do you mean?”

“I mean that… we live together and we just fucked. What does this mean for the future?”

“Well, I thought that next time we could do it the right way. I could take you out on a proper date, and then fuck you on the kitchen counter.”

You laugh at how blunt he is, but you love the idea he just proposed.

“Okay. Sounds fine by me.”

[dreamescapeswriting]

Make Me Stay ~ Changbin [M] [Request]

WORD COUNT: 20.5K (As of this moment the longest imagine on my account….whoops)

GENRE: Non Idol Au, Mechanic Changbin, slow burn(first time doing slow burn fics) Smut, fluffy, SMUT, cute fluff lil angst, hapyy ending 

PAIRING: Mechanic Changbin x Fem!Reader

The sun from the sunset was beaming down through the windshield of your 1967 Volkswagen beetle causing you to squint as you continued driving down the old dirt road. The sun setting was always so bright and in your face, it made it hard to see anything going on around you. The sat nav on your phone had convinced you that this was the right way but it didn't seem like it at all. There were no buildings around for miles. Just trees, bushes and more trees, a serial killer's favourite place to be hiding out.

"Stupid thing," You mumbled as you pulled up towards a huge gate that looked like it lead onto the private property in front of you, you hissed punching in a new address into your phone. All you were trying to do was get into the city, you'd been doing a huge road trip alone, exploring Korean since you'd lived there most of your life and hadn't explored much. Many people told you not to be "stupid" that it could be dangerous all alone, not to mention lonely or boring but so far you'd enjoyed all of your time. You'd managed to do a lot of sightseeing on your way around the places you'd been, you'd gotten to do a lot of things you wouldn't normally do if you were with friends. The drive had given you space to think over things in your life, it gave you the time to think over everything that was waiting for you back at home...Which was a whole lot of nothing since you'd basically worked in a dead-end job for the last 6 years of your life in order to take this trip. Busan was the third to last place on your list to tick off and so far you hadn't even gotten into the town yet, you were right on the outskirts, the middle of nowhere surrounded by trees and a whole lot of nothing.

"Don't! Don't you dare!" You cried out as your car began to judder forward when you were driving down the back dirt roads, smoke coming from the back of it where the engine was. You wanted to scream out but you held it in thinking it was probably nothing, smoke normally meant that the old engine was just overheating itself. It was perfectly normal.

"No!" You whined out to yourself as you pulled into a small layby near some trees, praying to yourself it would just be the heat. There was nothing around you for miles thanks to the shoddy GPS system on your phone you would have thrown the thing out if it wasn't the only way you would get out of this situation.

Kicking the wheel of your car as you walked to the back of the car to check out what was wrong with the engine if it was the radiators you could fix the issue yourself. It did it occasionally, well more than occasionally, overheat. It would do it every day to the point where you had to carry around water in huge cartons just to make sure you could look after it. As soon as you opened the boot of the car you were met with smoke to the face and you groaned looking inside, you weren't a mechanic but you already knew it didn't look good. There was oil splotched all over the place and bubbling out of the oil dip, something looked as though it was snapped and there was a major stench coming from the engine yourself.

"So much for an easy fix." You mumbled slamming the boot shut and groaning at the thought of being stuck out in the middle of nowhere with nowhere to go. The private land was about four miles away and you knew there was nothing around you for miles in any direction,

"Piece of shit," You whispered as you looked at the small light blue beetle all of it beginning to rust with how old it was.

"I didn't mean it, baby," You whispered as though you had hurt the cars feelings. You put a small kiss on your fingers before placing it on the wing mirror, then you began scrolling through your phone you searching for your recovery number. Having no idea if they would have a branch out in the middle of nowhere or be able to find you out here. You were so far from any major towns, you hadn't seen a single signpost anywhere to give to them over the phone.

"Hi, I've broken down and I have the cover with your service. The only problem is I have no idea where I am..." You trailed off hoping that there was some way they could help you out even though you had no idea what to do yourself. There was some typing on the other end of the phone then a soft voice came through,

"Not a problem love, we can track your phone with our systems just give me one moment," The woman on the other side of the phone seemed pleasant enough to talk to, she hummed while she was typing on her computer.

"I can see you're location, unfortunately, we won't have an official truck out there but we can send someone from a nearby towing company." That was better than the thought of being stuck out forever so you agreed.

"That would be great," You whispered as you got into your car, wanting to stay as warm as you could since the air was starting to drop. It might have been the summer but the nights were always chilly,

"I'll send you the name of our drive and the licence plate as soon as I find out myself," You thanked her for all her work, giving her your insurance information and making sure she had everything she would need before hanging up.

"Hyunjin?" You questioned as a huge truck pulled up beside you on the road, it had been the first sign of anyone else since you ended the phone call. No one had driven down or up this road which made you wonder if the house you'd pulled up at was abandoned.

"That's me, you're-" The long-haired blonde man looked down at a clipboard as he got out of his white truck, much like your small blue Beetle it was starting to rust from how old it was. It must have been a family business, he didn't look any older than you did to be having a van that old.

"Y/n? Driving the 1967 Volkswagon?" He glanced up again and smiled at you, he wasn't at all what you had pictured when you got the text with his name. You always imagined tow drivers to be old and creepy looking but Hyunjin seemed genuinely nice, though you couldn't always judge a book by its cover.

"I haven't seen one of these in a while, what's wrong with it?" He looked impressed by the car so you smiled, taking him around to the boot to show him the engine. Opening it up and wincing at the sight as soon as you did so,

"I seem to have run into some engine troubles," You mumbled as he looked inside the boot and hissed, the sight was enough to make you cry. You knew for a fact it wasn't going to be cheap fixing all of this, not to mention you would now have to find a new place to stay since you hadn't exactly planned on staying in the town. Just passing through after doing some sightseeing.

"I'll take you to Changbin, he does repairs and he's the closest garage to here." You looked at him while nodding, slamming the boot shut and smiling to yourself as Hyunjin helped you up into his truck to wait while he got the car ready on the back of his van.

"Changbin!" You looked around as Hyunjin walked you down the gravelled pathway towards a rundown looking garage shouting out the name of the mechanic. If you hadn't seen the man working on a car in the back you would have thought the place was deserted, the building looked like it would fall apart and the slightest bit of wind change.

"Changin?!" Hyunjin cried out again as he tried to gain the attention of the man who was currently bent over a car and rapping along to some music that was playing. The man was wearing dark blue overalls that were tied around his waist but you hadn't seen his face yet.

"Wait here, I'll go and talk to him," Hyunjin told you as he rushed off over to the car, you hummed and glanced around taking in the sight of everything around you. There was a house beside the garage that looked to be in better shape, you assumed it was where this Changbin lived. Hyunjin had been telling you about him on the drive over, that they'd been close friends since school, how he and a few of their other friends had wanted to start a boy group together when they were kids. It was nice hearing what people dreamed about, back home no one ever discussed that sort of thing. They only cared about what job you wanted after school, dreaming wasn't allowed in the town you grew up in.

"You own the 1967 Beetle?" A voice questioned from behind you snapping you out of your small dream, you jumped up a little before nodding and turning to face whoever it was. From the overalls he was wearing you assumed he was the mechanic, Changbin, he smiled shyly at you and you grabbed the keys from your pocket. Changbin smiled at you but you couldn't help but take notice of what he was wearing, his overalls were tied around his waist, he had a white tank top covering his top half but it was covered in oil and sweat, it made him look incredibly hot. Shaking your head you snapped out of the daydream about him and gave him the keys to your car, Hyunjin had dropped it off at the top of the driveway for you not wanting to clog up Changbin's workspace.

"She's old, the family passed it down and I had her fixed up. The engine seems to have gone bye-bye on me...I think the timing belt snapped, I know for sure the oil has...bubbled over-" You stopped talking when you saw how Changbin was staring at you. His eyebrow was raised at the way you were talking about the car, when Hyunjin told him what was happening inside your engine he assumed you'd have no idea but you seemed to have a pretty good one to him.

"Most people don't know what's wrong when they bring it in," He chuckled softly truly impressed that you seemed to know what was wrong. That smile could have melted your whole heart if you stared at it long enough, it sent a warm feeling throughout your body just seeing him smile. You smiled back at him feeling the need to laugh a little as you both walked in the direction of your car falling into a comfortable silence as Changbin looked up at the vehicle.

"You weren't kidding when you said old," He laughed softly stepping over to the car and unlocking it. He ran his hands over the bonnet and smiled to himself, it had been so long since someone had brought anything decent for him to work on. He'd been surprised when Hyunjin mentioned the year and model,

"She's a classic," You mentioned looking at the expression on his face as he opened the doors to see all of the original interiors was still intact. Right down to the radio dials and cassette player that had been installed in the later models, it was a sight to see nowadays since many people would modify them.

"Holy fuck." He was truly stunned by how well it was still kept together, you didn't see it much now unless the person restoring the car was only doing it to sell it on or keep for a display piece.

"This is insane, I'll have to order the pieces in the fix it but you're welcome to stay in my house in the guest room until it's finished. It would be my pleasure to work on this car." He mentioned as he looked up at you, both of you heading towards the boot to take a look at the engine. Hyunjin had mentioned that Busan was a good two-hour drive if you wanted to get a hotel so you decided to take up Changbin's offer of a room. Hyunjin said he was a good guy and so far he seemed relatively normal and nice to you, who were you to say no to someone being good at hospitality.

"What happened?" He questioned when he took a look at the engine his face scrunching up as he was hit with smoke, you winced as you saw the look of disgust hit his face.

"Driving down a dirt road because my sat nav told me to, turns out I was wrong and then when I was on my way out, Buggy here gave out." He raised his eyebrow when he heard the nickname that you had for the car, you looked down at the floor feeling slightly shy at the look he was giving you.

"Everyone names their car," Your voice trailed off making Changbin smile even more as he nodded his head in agreement with you. He shut the boot as he began walking you back in the direction of his garage.

"I'll have everything priced up by the morning for you," He spoke as he walked into the main area of the garage as he went to lay your keys down.

"I don't charge people for staying at the home, it's just empty without anyone around." He mumbled as he began noting something down on a pad of paper, you weren't able to make out his handwriting so you didn't attempt to.

"Head up to the house, make yourself at home. Do you have any clothes with you?" He questioned as he looked up at you, wondering if he was going to need to lend you some of his own clothing or if you would be okay for now.

"In the car," He threw you the keys then he began writing down again, you headed off back to your car.

Wanting to get some comfortable clothes for the night, you twirled the keys around your fingers as you walked. Thinking over how nice everyone had been to you so far and how comfortable you already felt with a stranger. Hyunjin waved goodbye as he pulled out of the driveway when you reached it,

"Have a nice night! Tell him to give you some of Lix's cookies! You'll never regret eating them!" You laughed softly as Hyunjin waved his long arm out of the window and drove off down the road. You wondered how many people Changbin had allowed to stay over when he did their cars up and if he had a lot of business being out in the middle of nowhere.

Slamming the bonnet shut you took your overnight bag in the direction of the house, not paying attention to anything happening around you as you looked into your bank savings account. The money that was left was going to have to go on the car which meant your road trip would be officially cut short. Locking your phone you slid it into your bag before you let out a loud squeal, somehow you'd lost your footing on all the peddles that lined the floor causing you to slip. Falling over and smacking your head and ankle onto the ground as you let out a loud groan, wincing as you tried to get up on your own.

"Y/n?!" You looked up to see Changbin rushing over to you with a panicked expression on his face. He'd heard the scream and came rushing out from the garage to see what had happened, he hissed as he saw what had cut your head open on the floor.

"Here," He pulled off the tank top he was wearing and it took everything inside of you not to stare at his body in awe, he had huge biceps which you saw earlier but his abs were to die for.

"How did you fall?" He questioned trying hard not to laugh when he saw your eyes drifting to his body. He reached out with his hand covered in his tank top to dab the blood away from the small cut. From what he could see it wasn't major, just a small scrape that he could clean up indoors if you needed to.

"I-I wasn't paying attention," You hissed trying to stand up and that was when you and Changbin looked down at your ankle that was the source of most of your pain.

"I'll get you some ice and some painkillers, you'll have a headache soon." He then ripped his tank top in half as if it was made of nothing but tissue paper then gently wrapped it around your bruised ankle to help put some pressure on it while a makeshift bandage.

"The ice will bring the swelling out, then I'll get heat to help." You whimpered as he wrapped his arm around your waist and forced yours around his broad shoulders.

"I'm sorry I'm such a pain." You grumbled as he helped you limp in the direction of the main house that was in front of you. You'd only just met him and now you were using him to get around his place of work and home,

"You're not a pain, I'll get the first aid kit if you wait here." He sat you down on a grey sofa and you looked around, it was quite a large open home. The kitchen opened right into the living room, there was a wooden staircase right in front of the front door entrance which you assumed leads to the bedrooms.

"Here it is," You heard Changbin acknowledge followed by a small bang low groan came from him making you giggle a little, you covered your mouth to stop yourself from laughing.

"Do I need to be in charge of the first aid kit now?" He chuckled as he walked over to you from a small cupboard shaking his head at you,

"I hit my head on the shelf." You held back the second small giggle that was trying to escape from your lips and looked at him as he came over to you. He was rubbing the back of his head as he walked towards you. Sitting down next to you on the sofa as he looked through the small green box,

"I haven't had to use this in a while so I hope it's all good," He was biting down on his lower lip while reading through the contents of the box, checking the small butterfly stitches were okay to use. He didn't know if they went out of date or if they stopped working,

"Will it hurt?" You questioned nervously as you saw what he had in his hand. He gazed at you, you were biting down on your lower lip while watching his hands on the stitches with wide eyes.

"No, it's just a slight tugging sensation that's all." You nodded as he moved closer to you, his face inches away from yours as he began applying the small strips to the cut on your head. It wasn't anything major but he thought it would be best for your sake.

"This might hurt," He mumbled as he slowly took off the makeshift bandage from your ankle glancing up at you to see if you were okay. Your face was scrunched up in pain as you waited for him to do something else,

"It's swollen pretty bad but I don't think it's broken," He whispered to you as he slowly ran his hand over the skin you grimaced as he began applying a bandage around the bottom of your foot and up your ankle making sure it was secure enough, but not too tight to cut off your circulation.

"I'll go and get some ice after I've taken you to the room." He helped you up again, wrapping his arm around your waist as he got you up from the sofa. Waiting for you to steady yourself before he attempted to move,

"T-This is really nice of you, you shouldn't have to put up with a client like this." He shook his head at your words promising you that it was fine, it was really no big deal to him. He told you how he'd looked after his older sister in the same way whenever she was clumsy enough to hurt herself.

"Are you close with your family?" You yawned halfway through the questioned but he got it, helping you hop up the stairs as he nodded his head watching your feet carefully as you both walked.

"Pretty close, my sister and I are more like friends than siblings. It's nice," He chuckled as you hopped onto the landing and then tried to stand on your own. It wasn't because you wanted to seem tough but his hands on your waist was making your heart skip a beat and it was distracting to have him touch you even in an innocent manner. You couldn't help but let your mind wander onto what else his hands would be good at doing such large, long fingers. You shook your head trying to ignore the thought as he began to walk you into one of the rooms.

"I'll get a heater inside, I know it gets quite cold in this room in the summer." He sat you down on the edge of the double bed, it was in the middle of a plain white room. Wooden beams on the ceiling that were lined with posters of different artists, some you'd heard of others you hadn't, it must have been his own childhood room by the looks of it or his sisters you couldn't tell yet.

"I'll go and get some blankets, make yourself comfortable." He spoke to you as he headed out of the room, not being able to stop the smile on his face from the moment you stepped foot on the property. He grabbed the blankets from the airing cupboard, shutting it carefully as he made his way back to your room,

"I found a fluffy one and then a-" Changbin cut himself short when he saw you fast asleep on the pillow, you looked so peaceful laid there like that. He smiled weakly grabbing a spare pillow from beside you and carefully placing it under your bad ankle to make sure it was elevated for the night. Then he made sure to cover you with a warm blanket so you wouldn't get cold in the night. He sighed to himself going to get your bag from the living room to bring up to the room for the morning when you would need it.

Changbin walked up towards the top of the stairs to see if you'd woken up yet, he'd been awake for the last two hours getting the parts for your car ordered in so you could rest easy knowing that they were on their way into the garage. He'd had to call a bunch of companies since the car was so old but the thought of telling you that he couldn't fix it broke his heart. He could already tell how much you loved it from the short period of knowing you. 

"Y/n?" He called out when he heard a floorboard creak inside the room, you stared at the door wondering what to say or do in this situation. You had no idea he was on his way up, you were just on your way out of the room to use the bathroom. Last night you had been too tired to even question anything going on, where anything was and what you should even do when staying in someone else's house. Sleepovers had never been like this because at least before staying over you had been friends but, you didn't know Changbin. 

"I made breakfast if you're hungry, it's downstairs," Changbin said to the door as he realised how unsure you must have been about what was happening. To him letting out a room or two for a night was no big deal. He would do it if a customer couldn't get into the town for a hotel or one of the boys were staying over for the night, so he hadn't thought about it until now. 

"Also I laid some fresh towels out in the bathroom if you wanted to take a shower," You pulled the door open as he spoke and you nodded at him. He looked just as good as yesterday only this time he was in fresh overalls and a new tank top.  

"This is really nice of you, thank you again." He looked down at your ankle to see you were hovering it in the air, panic rushed through him as he thought about it possibly being broken or worse. It hadn't looked bad last night but now he was worried about it. 

"It's okay, just a little sore. The shower will help," You promised him when you noticed the concerned look spreading along his face, you didn't want him to have to worry about this since it was your fault for falling over in the first place. Changbin smiled shyly as he looked back up at you, 

"I'll come and turn the shower on, it's a little tricky if you don't know what you're doing," You followed him along towards the bathroom, limping whenever you put too much pressure on your ankle trying to ignore the floorboards that would creak whenever you stepped on them. It made you wonder how Changbin had ever snuck around as a kid. 

"Thanks," You whispered, leaning against the door frame as he hung over the side of the bathtub, turning the shower on and fiddling around with the dials. The water rushing down as he held his hand out to see if it was okay for you.

"The towels are on the heated rack, should be nice for when you get out." He smiled brightly at you, promising to get you some new bandages for your ankle while he was downstairs. 

"Thank you...Again," He chuckled at you shaking his head and reminding you again that it was his pleasure. 

"I'll be downstairs, scream if you need me." He joked playfully, walking out of the bathroom and heading back down to the kitchen. 

His phone was lighting up with text messages from Hyunjin asking what had happened the night before with you. Changbin made the mistake of telling Hyunjin that you'd fallen over and how Changbin's heart had been racing when he was sitting so close to you. Now the boy wasn't going to let Changbin get away with it without giving him some details, not that there were any details for him to give away.

Changbin: Nothing happened. We don't even know one another. Stop being a creep. He hit send and shook his head, going back to making some breakfast for you both, making sure to keep it hot in the oven while you were showering. Nothing was worse than cold food...Other than Hyunjin who had set yet another text, this time a huge paragraph.

Hyunjin: All I'm saying is...You haven't seen anyone in a while, she's cute, you're cute get to know her- Changbin stopped reading when he heard a thud followed by a scream coming from you, he dropped his phone onto the counter. 

"Y/n?!" He cried out rushing up the staircase and towards the bathroom knocking on the door rather loudly his voice coming out panicked as he spoke, 

"You okay?! Answer me if you're alive...I-I don't wanna walk in," He stuttered at the thought of having to walk in there while you were indecent. The mere thought of it causing his hands to get sweaty as he waited for you to give some kind of response to him, he bit down on his lip. 

"I-I'm okay, I slipped...C-Can-" You groaned at the thought of asking someone you barely knew for help, sitting there in nothing but a towel. You clutched the towel around your body, you'd slipped while wrapping the towel around yourself losing your footing on the water and your bad ankle. 

"Can you help me up? I slipped, I'm decent." You told him as you realised he must have thought you were naked or something. The door slowly opened and Changbin walked into the room turning a bright red colour as he saw you leaning against the bathtub on the floor. A blue towel wrapped around you tightly, he came closer to you as he spoke,

"Here," He wrapped his arm around your waist and helped you up onto your foot so you could keep your bad one up in the air, helping you out of the bathroom. 

"I have more bandages in the kitchen when you come down I'll wrap it up for you and get some ice." He was walking you carefully and slowly back to the bedroom while you tried not to get embarrassed over the fact that you'd fallen over twice in his presence and were now standing in nothing but a towel in front of him.

"I'm not usually this clumsy," You informed him as he pushed open the door to the bedroom you were staying in. He let out a low chuckle as he looked at you shaking his head as he thought back on what he'd said before he went to cook. 

"You know...When I told you to scream if you needed me I didn't mean it literally," He winked at you playfully, he had no idea where the wink came from but he liked the fact that you seemed to get shy, letting out a giggle and looked down at the floor. The simple wink had somehow sent your stomach into a frenzy and made your heart skip a beat.

"Will you be okay?" He questioned once you were sitting safely on the edge of the bed, he noticed how you'd made the bed again and he smiled at how thoughtful it was. Normally whenever someone stayed over they left the cleaning for him to do when he wasn't busy. 

"Yeah, I'll be right down." You whispered to him as you look at your bag that was sitting on a chair beside the bed, you wondered what you could wear that wouldn't bother your ankle too much, Changbin smiled before leaving the room and going back down to the kitchen. 

Changbin: She fell again, starting to think she's almost as clumsy as Jisung. I'll talk later. With lightning speed, Hyunjin replied immediately trying to tease his friend. 

Hyunjin: Ever thought she's falling on purpose so you'll save her? She was in the shower remember. The text ended with a suggestive string of emojis to which Changbin groaned and threw his phone into the drawer, wanting nothing more to do with Hyunjin that day. 

"I made tea as well, or I can make some coffee if you prefer," Changbin called to you when he heard small hops coming from the staircase. He glanced over to see you in a pair of high waisted shorts a band t-shirt, his eyes travelled up your legs as he took in the sight of you.

"Tea is perfect," You breathed out in relief as you reached the bottom floor without falling over or hurting yourself this time. 

"Come and sit," Changbin pulled out a white wooden chair that was in front of a kitchen island and you waddled over to him, watching as he began opening some drawers. Pulling out bandages and scissors before coming over to you to get you bandaged up for the day. 

"I have to finish that car I was working on yesterday but you're welcome to do whatever you want, watch a movie, or a show or something." He spoke calmly as he knelt down in front of you, carefully wrapping the new bandage around your ankle, pulling it a little tighter so that your ankle was secure. 

"I'll probably watch a movie, Hyunjin said that Busan is 2 hours away?" You wanted to confirm that Hyunjin was telling the truth and it wasn't just some trick so he wouldn't have to take you. 

"Yeah, two hours and from here to Seoul it's around four in a car." He cut the end of the bandage off before tying it around your leg and smiling up at you to show off his handiwork.

"I'm not a nurse but I don't think its that bad a job," He told you as you complimented his work on your ankle, 

"Well if you handle my car like you've handled me I'm sure she's in perfect hands." Changbin began blushing a deeper red than before and you smiled at him, you'd never had that effect on anybody before. 

"I'll get you some tea," You thanked him shyly and looked around again, the house was cosy and small but it did make you wonder about where his family were. There were photographs of them on the wall, they all looked so happy together,

"I know you mentioned your sister last night...Where is she?" It probably came across as you being nosy but you were generally interested in getting to know Changbin as a person. He came back to the kitchen island with plates stacked high with food for the both of you, he set them down before looking at you. Walking away to get the drinks as he spoke to you,

"Well my sister went to Seoul National University and my parents moved out there with her. I stayed to run the family business," He came back to the table again with tea for you both and sat down on the chair beside you, 

"You grew up out here?" He nodded at you, he could see where this was going so he cut you off before you could question him on school and friends. It was the question everyone asked whenever they came out here, 

"It's not as quiet as you probably think i is. There are some farms further down the road and then a small school where Hyunjin and I met the rest of our friends." That explained how they'd met, you'd wondered in the van when Hyunjin told you how far away everything was. You would have assumed they were homeschooled since everything seemed so far away from them,

"I thought you were going to tell me you travelled two hours a day for school," It was normal, you knew people travelled further for other schools, he shook his head at you. Telling you the only time they'd travelled to school was for high school and it was an hour-long bus journey there and back.

"What was school like?" You questioned as you began eating some of the food that Changbin had prepared. Withstanding the urge to let out a moan of delight when you tasted it, it was far better than you had imagined for a mechanic. It made you wonder who had taught him how to cook and if he got it from his mother or father, 

"Y-You okay? Is it not good?!" Changbin panicked as he read the look on your face, he couldn't tell if it was a good shocked face or a bad one. You were very hard to read for him at the minute and it scared him a little, he hadn't realised it until now but he'd been trying to impress you. 

"No! No! It's actually really good, I didn't- I didn't expect it." You admitted shyly and Changbin chuckled, his friend Jeongin had said the same thing when he first cooked for them all.

"My dad taught me how to cook growing up, Mum taught me cars." He admitted as he looked at you, you had a smile on your face as you looked at him intrigued to know more about him. Much like his your smile hadn't left your face yet. 

"School." You told him as you waited to hear more about his childhood and how he'd grown up around here, 

"School was normal I guess...We formed a friend group, tried to start a band as every young boy does." You giggled at the thought of it, pushing a piece of pancake into your mouth and shaking your head, 

"Not just boys, I wanted to be in a girl group but not many others did." You admitted to him as you began exchanging stories from your "girl group" days which turned out to be more of a solo carer turned into, the one singing job at a talent show followed by you never singing in front of people again. 

"What was your group name?" You quizzed when you were drying the dishes up for him. The conversations had been going back and forth while you ate. He'd told you all their stage names but not the group name itself, 

"I think we called ourselves Stray kids, we-" He started laughing through the sentence as he thought back on everything and shook his head, 

"We called ourselves that because we always strayed away from the usual kid's stuff," He shook his head at the memories and looked at you wondering the same question, 

"Your turn. Your group name?" He questioned, turning off the hot water and drying his hands while he stared at you. You were shying away from the question and shook your head, 

"It was something dumb, unlike Stray Kids which seems like a good name..." He wasn't going to let you get out of this one though, he wanted to know the ins and outs so he shook his head, 

"Come on, I told you mine." He pressed, moving closer to you and sitting down on the chair beside you, you groaned laying your face in your hands as you thought back on it all. The name had just been something you randomly thought of on the day, a 12-year-old you didn't have much imagination for names at the time.

"The group was called January Spice...I formed the group in January...Clearly, and I liked spicy food." He began to laugh softly at the time and you moaned, rolling your head down on the countertop in front of you. 

"Laugh away, you had stage names remember. SpearB," You mocked playfully earning a playful glare from Changbin as he got up from the counter. 

"I need to go work on the cars, do you want me to set the TV up?" He questioned as he pointed over at the tv while looking at you, but you had a better idea,

"C-Can I come?" You questioned, the thought of being alone in the house would bother you too much and you wanted to get to know him better. Changbin's heart warmed at the thought of you wanting to spend time with him more than you had that morning at least, 

"Sure. We'll take a chair out so you can sit while I work." He laughed picking up one of the barstools from the kitchen island and heading out, you limping slowly behind him as he went to open the garage doors. 

"Bliss," He called out randomly in the silence, you frowned looking at him. It had been quiet while he worked on the car for a couple of minutes, you didn't know if he wanted complete silence or if it would be okay to talk. He was bent over the hood of a car as he worked on the engine, he could tell you were confused by the lack of response, 

"You said everyone names their car, mine was called Bliss." You nodded along with him now following along with what he meant, 

"Was?" He whined out at the question and thought of his car, he hadn't been away from it since the day he'd gotten it until his parents needed it. He knew they would need it more than him so he gave it up. Changbin had his choice of cars around the yard that they bought from people over the years. But none of them was 'Bliss', his dream car. 

"Out in the city with my parents, they needed it to get around." He told you as he placed his hand on his chest, faking hurt for dramatic effect splashing oil all over his clean white vest top.

"Now I just have Dave," He groaned facing over at a Ford Pickup truck that was sitting beside the house, 

"He's only good when I need to go into town and come back with all of the snacks Felix makes for me,"

"Felix is the one that bakes right?" You remembered both Hyunjin and Changbin telling you about him. Changbin said that Felix was better than him at cooking but it was hard to believe when you'd ate Changbin's food. 

"Yeah! I think I'll see him before your parts come so you can have some of his cookies for the road," He laughed going back down into the hood of the car while you stared at the floor feeling a sinking feeling in your chest as you thought back on that. You'd totally forgotten about driving back home. Ending your road trip short and yet the one thing that was making you feel down the most was leaving here, you'd loved spending so much time with Changbin it felt as though you'd known him longer than you had.

"Yeah- Sounds good," Changbin could hear the uncertainty in your voice and he decided to look back at you, turning his head as he caught you looking a little sad. 

"Can you pass me the adjustable wrench?" He questioned snapping you out from your daydream, you reached for it and handed it over to him in silence. He could tell that making you think of home had struck a nerve so he looked back down at the car trying to come up with something to distract you from it, 

"Why did you leave home? Why did you decide to go on the huge road trip alone?" He licked his lips as he began fixing the engine again not glancing over at you. You took in a deep breath and shook your head thinking over it all. 

"I- I don't know, I just..." You'd never said it out loud to anyone before in fear of hurting their feelings but where you lived was awful. No one did a thing about their dreams, they worked in dead-end jobs like they were running their lives on autopilot all of the time.

"I looked around and realised there wasn't a single person there, whose life I wanted." By now Changbin was resting his hands on the closed bonnet of the car and staring at you, he watched the way your face contorted thinking back on everything back home. He could tell you didn't want to go back there, 

"So you travelled to find somewhere you wanted to stay?" He cleaned off his hands on a towel while he waited for your response, 

"Maybe..." You whispered not wanting to admit that you may have found somewhere. That it was Busan was seemingly like a great place despite not seeing it as a whole yet, you sensed it was probably Changbin making you feel like you wanted to stay.

The rest of the day was spent with you and Changbin getting to know one another on a deeper level. He told you about his time growing up and you did the same, exchanging horror stories from your high school years and what you had done for a living before going on the road trip. 

Now you were both watching a movie together, it was some horror movie that his friend Minho had suggested you both watch together. Though it wasn't really scary...At all. Changbin thought he'd only suggested it because he had you over at the house and "watching horror movies scared girls into your arms" was something Minho always used to say in school. But you weren't scared, in fact, you were laying your head on Changbin as you drifted off to sleep, Changbin smiled when he heard you murmur in your sleep. Holding onto his arms as you got comfortable against him, snuggling your head into him. He knew if you were awake you would be far too shy to do this which was why he wrapped his arm around your shoulder enjoying the moment while he had it. He drew your body closer to his as he got comfy. It somehow felt natural to be in this position with you, as though you'd done this a million times before. 

"C-Changbin," He heard the small whine of his name leave your lips and he froze in place wondering if you'd woken up and felt him holding you or if you were dreaming about him. He blushed at the thought of him being in your dreams and glanced at his phone, it was getting late and he had to be up early soon but he didn't want to leave this position. He wanted to stay right here with you but sleeping on the sofa caused back pains, he would know after the many nights he'd spent on it after crashing. 

The next morning you rolled over to stop the sun from blinding you in your face but ended up rolling over and hurting your ankle as it came into contact with the edge of the bed.

"Shit," You hissed, sitting up straight and looking down at yourself, you were still in the clothes from yesterday but, you were in the bedroom. You could have sworn you'd been sitting downstairs. It was the last thing you could remember, you were watching a horror movie with Changbin and pretending to be a little afraid so you could hide in his arms. Looking back on it now it seemed silly and childish but you wanted to hold onto him or have him hold you, even if it was just a little while. You hadn't meant to fall asleep beside him and have him carry you up to the bed, now you felt like such a fool.

"Y/n? You alright?" Changbin asked as he came out of the bathroom from his shower, he was about to head into his room when he heard you moving around in the bedroom. Pulling up your black jeans you hummed at him, pulling the door open as soon as you were dressed. Then you walked out showing him that you weren't limping around anymore while you did the best you could not to whine out. It was still hard to walk on but at least now you could do it on your own and without limping, he chuckled softly so you looked up at him. Your mouth could have dropped to the floor when you saw him standing there in nothing but a towel. His body on full display for you to see, beads of water dripping down his arms, abs and face. As he looked at you your mouth ran dry as you realised you were staring at him as if he was some model in a magazine. This time it was your turn to get shy and turn away from him as you got embarrassed.

"I'm heading into the town today, the market will be on. You're welcome to join me if you'd like." He told you as he turned his back on you, heading towards his bedroom so that you wouldn't have to be shy about staring at him anymore.

"Y-Yeah! Sounds great, I-I'm gonna go- Make a drink." You stuttered out as you tried to make it down the staircase as quickly as you could with your bad ankle. Changbin sniggered to himself as he heard you mumbling to yourself about staring.

"He can see you staring you idiot," Was the last words he heard from you before he went to change into some clothes for the town.

Instead of his usual attire, Changbin came down in dressed in some blue jeans and a white t-shirt while he pulled on a black jacket.

"We'll take Dave, no doubt Felix will have baked up a storm last night and I need to get some food while I'm in town." He told you as he walked into the kitchen where you were sitting. You'd made you both a hot cup of tea while you waited for him, wanting to trip yourself over for staring at him the way you did. It was clear from his actions over the two days he wasn't feeling the same way that you did, you had to stop fantasying about him and get on with it. Changbin was just there to fix your car and you would be out of there. It was as simple as that.

"Y/n?" Changbin called out as he stood beside you looking down at you, your hands were clamped down tightly on the mug you were holding. There was something on your mind anybody with more than one brain cell could see that.

"Sorry, what?" You muttered shaking your head as you realised he had been speaking to you the entire time and you hadn't noticed until now.

"I asked if you want me to put your tea into the travel mug for the drive?" He held up a pink travel mug and shook it so you would see what he was talking about, you nodded shyly at him and he chuckled taking the mug from your hands. As he stood at the sink he glanced over his shoulder at you, wanting to know what it was that seemed to be bothering you.

"What's on your mind?" He questioned as he poured the hot liquid into another container. A part of him hoped it was about what had happened upstairs and you would either confirm or deny your feelings for him but it was wishful thinking on his part. Neither of you had known one another that long and he didn't want to tell you his feelings too soon in fear of ruining what would be a lovely couple of days together.

"Going back home...The thought of it just lingers." You mumbled as you lied to him, you'd never ever been a good liar even your mother could tell when you lied to her. You couldn't exactly be straight forward and tell him that it was he that occupied your mind all morning and night. The situation on the top floor landing creeping back into your mind, which then took you back into thinking of the dream you'd had the night before. Nothing special had happened but Changbin had been there. You couldn't even remember what had happened, only that he was there and you kissed.

"Hmm," Changbin hummed as he looked at you knowing that it was a lie. Your eyes were locked on your hands and your body language had become blocked off to him, he hadn't known you long but he already knew your thinking of home face and that wasn't it. Whatever it was that was on your mind had you biting your bottom lip and playing with your hands nervously.

"Well, maybe you'll like Busan and you'll have found a place you want to stay." He nudged your side trying to wake you up from another daydream and he walked you out of the house in silence not knowing what to say to you to make things easier on your mind. This was the most you had been quiet around one another and it was starting to feel a little awkward.

"I'd offer to buy breakfast on the drive but if I do that I think Seungmin and Chan might kill me. They serve food all day from the moment they get there. You'll love it," As he spoke to you you looked at him and smiled as you tried to forget about kissing him in your dream and seeing him almost naked. At least now you'd both seen one another in nothing but a towel and you had nothing to be embarrassed about.

"What are they like?" You had questioned him on his friends before but nothing major, now that you were going to meet them all you wanted to know what you were in for before you got to the market and they would get to hang with you all day.

"Jump in, we have a whole two-hour drive. I'll tell you all about them," He chuckled as he looked at you, the chuckle made you feel more relaxed as you realised he was just breezing over the fact you'd seen him in a towel.

"In return though-" He started as he turned on the car of the pickup truck, turning the radio down from the last time he had been in the car alone. He didn't want to deafen you with his music blasting out suddenly at you.

"I want you to sing for me, otherwise I'm going to throw you to the boys. Like a sheep in a lion's den." You raised your eyebrow at the statement and turned your head to the side trying to think if that was the correct saying.

"I thought the saying was 'I'll feed you to the wolves'?" He licked his lips at you and shook his head acting confident in what he had said to you.

"Not anymore, I changed it. Find a song and start singing," He winked at you, nodding over at the glove box where he kept all of his CD's.

"Whoa. You have a lot of music," You mumbled as you flicked through the multiple CD holders he had inside to try and find a CD where you would at least know one song on it.

"I have to keep myself entertained on the long drives somehow," By now Changbin was pulling into the main road and heading into the town ready to listen to your singing.

By the time you pulled into a parking spot, you knew all of the boy's names, how he'd met every one of them and some small details about them all. Changbin and you had sung together, which led to some rather interesting duets in the car mostly you being shocked by how well Changbin could make up a rap on the spot. He could have had a huge music career if he had stuck it out.

"I just don't want to seem nervous," You told Changbin as he playfully teased you for wanting to know who all of his friends were when you got out of the car. Changbin slammed the door and laughed again, Hyunjin looked up from his phone as soon as he heard your voice and he smiled quickly sending a text to everyone that you were there.

"Is that Y/n I hear? Changbin hasn't scared you off then?" He laughed loudly gaining the attention of other people around you as you looked at him. You smiled back at him as you shook your head at his question,

"Not yet!" You giggled as he rushed over to you and Changbin, greeting Changbin with nothing but a nod of his head before turning to you.

"I hope you're enjoying your stay at Hotel-Dela-Changbin," You laughed softly and began talking with Hyunjin about Changbin's rapping in the car but Changbin began gushing about your singing voice.

"So where shall we start?" You questioned as you looked around you, you were still standing at the edge of the parking lot looking around for something. The market area seemed huge with both and indoor and outdoor market area, a huge building with floor to ceiling windows letting you see everything inside. You didn't dare admit to Changbin you'd never been to one before, the closest thing you'd gotten to a farmers market is a market stall in your home town that sold books.

"We'll start outdoors, Seungmin text saying he has some breakfast food ready for us and that Chan is getting angsty just waiting there." He chuckled glancing from his phone and up to you to make sure that would alright with you,

"Great let's go-" Your sentence was cut short by a loud whimper as you went to walk on your foot a little too eagerly and twisted your ankle, you wanted to cry out in pain but you held it back. Changbin instantly reached his hands out to grab you protectively and Hyunjin watched from the side a little shocked by how protective of you Changbin was acting.

"Ankle again?" Changbin questioned as he steadied you in his arms holding onto you tightly trying to make sure you didn't fall.

"Y-Yeah," The stutter in your voice wasn't because of your ankle but because of how he was holding you. His hands were on your waist, his breath against your neck as he stood close to you, stopping you from toppling over onto your face. Your heart began to pump as you felt him draw you closer to him, his chest against your back as you felt his heart racing just as yours was.

"Alright love birds, let's get moving." Hyunjin joked hoping that Seungmin had seen it from the stall he was working on. He clapped his hands together as he waited for you and Changbin to start moving together so he could get back to his job on directing everyone in the right places. Changbin looked at you as he linked his arm with yours, slowly walking with you in the direction of Seungmin and Chan who were both watching you from a distance. Smirking to one another as they watch you and Changbin engage in conversation with one another, staring up into one another's eyes getting lost in one another rather than paying attention to anything around you.

"It's like those old romance movies Minho claims he doesn't watch," Seungmin joked to Chan who was laughing softly at the thought of it. They could already tell that Changbin liked you a lot, they'd known him for a long time and knew he rarely smiled that much unless it was someone he really liked.

"I thought Changbin was going to join a nunnery he'd been single for so long." Felix joked as he loaded up a box full of baking goods for you to take back to the garage. All nine of you were sitting at a bench in the indoor market while you had some lunch together, Changbin and you had done a full lap of the outdoor market. Walking slowly, of course, to make sure you didn't hurt your ankle. The whole time you spoke about his life again, what he had planned for his future if he wasn't going to run the garage but now you were here with them all.

"Felix!" Changbin groaned as he playfully hit his friend for bringing it up in front of you, he didn't want you to know how long he'd been single in case it put you off him.

"It would be a monastery anyway since...Changbin is a dude." You whispered joining in on the playful teasing while Changbin started nodding sarcastically and licked the inside of his lip.

"Yeah! That's it! You encourage them!" He yelled at you jokingly but you held onto his arm and shook your head, promising him it was just a joke while Felix told him it wasn't.

"The boys and I were going to chip on getting you a Monk outfit." A biscuit was thrown in Felix's direction while you let out a loud surprised shriek as Changbin got up from the seat suddenly.

"Do they always act like this?" You questioned Chan who was sitting beside you watching them both, Changbin got up from the table and began racing after Felix around the indoor market, chasing him in and out of stalls and around people while you giggled.

"Sometimes, Changbin normally rises above it." He whispered turning to look at you as he tried to figure out how you felt about Changbin. Your eyes hadn't left him, watching him chase the smaller boy of the group around, yelling out that he would kill him amongst other playful remarks.

"To be blunt," Chan started once he realised he couldn't read what you were thinking based on your facial expression. As you turned to look at him your face softened wondering what it was that he wanted to ask, you placed a forkful of cake into your mouth and waited for him to continue on.

"Do you like him?" You almost choked on the piece of cake you were eating as he asked you point blankly about Changbin.

"What?! I don't- We don't know- I-" Chan smirked when he saw how easily flustered you were getting with the question, it was obvious now what the answer was even if you weren't saying it yourself.

"You do?" He questioned, biting down on your lip you looked back over at Changbin before nodding. It would be no use lying to yourself about your feelings for him so you weren't going to bother trying to hide it.

"Yeah. I do. Don't...Don't tell him? It's dumb but we haven't known each other long and I don't want things to be awkward-"

"Don't want to be awkward?" Changbin asked making you jump in your seat and look up at him, you were instantly hit with nervousness as you thought he'd heard you and Chan talking about him.

"Nothing, can we take a walk? I want to stretch my ankle for a little bit." Chan slyly tapped his nose at you as a way of telling you that he would keep your secret so you began heading off to look through the indoor market.

"Cute!" You expressed once you saw a stand selling handmade outfits for animals, you walked away from Changbin who was buying you both a hot chocolate and over to the lady who was serving.

"Do you own a pet?" She asked you as you looked through everything,

"No, but now I want to." You whined, Changbin chuckled as he caught you whining and walked over to you, looking through everything as he greeted the woman at the stand.

"Changbin, watch while I have a bathroom break?" He nodded at her and she rushed out of the booth going towards the bathroom while you giggled at everything. Picking up a bow tie that would go around a dogs neck,

"Look, it would suit you." You giggled as you adjusted the neck to fit around Changbin's. Holding it around his neck as you stared into his eyes, getting lost in them as you looked at one another.

"S-So cute," You whispered dropping the bow tie on the floor as you both leant closer to one another. Your heart was in your throat as you moved closer to one another, your lips inches away. Changbin wrapped his arms around your waist as your you were about to kiss when someone let out a loud screech. Changbin backed away from you first making you whine as you looked down at the floor acting as though you weren't just about to kiss one another. The fact that he pulled away first made you feel as though he didn't want to be that close to you,

"Binnie!" You heard a female voice cry out before someone came bounding over to you both, pushing you back a couple of steps and causing you to knock into the stand.

"Watch it Flair!" Changbin yelled moving away from her and holding onto your elbow to stop you from falling over anymore and then he stared at the girl. She had long jet-black hair as she stared at you, giving you a dirty look the second Changbin held onto you.

"What are you doing here? I thought you never wanted to see me again?" Changbin questioned her once you were steady on your feet. Minho, who had seen the entire thing began making his way over to move you out of the firing range. Whenever Flair saw Changbin it ended badly, the last time she'd seen him she flipped out never wanting to see him again but now she'd seen him with someone else Minho knew what was bound to happen.

"I still love you silly, we should go for a drink." Her hands were holding onto his biceps as Minho reached your side,

"Come on," He pulled you over in the direction of the table where the boys were again so you could be alone and not have to listen to their fight.

"Flair again?" Jeongin questioned when they all looked over at Changbin who seemed to be turning red in the face as he spoke back and forth with the girl.

"Who is she?" You questioned shyly, not wanting to look as though you were jealous, you had nothing to be jealous over. It was only a small kiss and it hadn't even happened, though your rapidly beating heart would say otherwise.

The drive home had been silent except for the music that had been playing through the speaker system. Changbin and you hadn't spoken since the almost kiss in the indoor market, he'd come to stand at the table and told the boys he best start driving home before it got too late which meant it was your cue to leave as well.

Now you were heading up to the bedroom to get some rest for the night, holding onto the railing instead of relying on Changbin to help balance you.

"Y/n?" Changbin questioned as you hand touched the golden door handle on the door, you turned your body to face him as you forced yourself to look him in the eyes,

"I'm sorry. Flair...She's a little too much and she's my ex...I had to talk to her-" The boys had explained who Flair was to you, she cheated on Changbin multiple times with different guys to the point where they had their relationship as open but Changbin wasn't allowed to date anyone else. If he even looked at another girl Flair would flip out on him and ''break up'' the relationship without a second thought. When they finally did have a real break up she swore she never wanted to see him again, until she got needy and followed him everywhere. Then claimed she never wanted to see him again. Minho had explained she'd only gone up to him at the market today because she'd seen him with you and got jealous.

"It's fine. It's not as if we're dating, right?" You knew it was wrong to snap at him but you did so anyway, walking into the room and slamming the door behind you. Changbin stared at the door sighing to himself, he should never have stood there to speak to Flair, he should have just taken you away and finished the kiss. Now things were going to be weird between the two of you.

As soon as you knew he was gone from outside of the door you let out a cry into your hands, it seemed stupid crying over a boy you weren't with but it hurt how he left you there like that for someone else.

When the sun woke you up that morning you didn't bother moving from the bedroom, you just rolled over onto your side and began to scroll through your phone trying to distract yourself. There had been someone at the front door earlier that morning talking with Changbin but the voices were muffled through your door, so you weren't able to make out who it was or what they were talking about so you just went back to sleep for a few hours until now. 

Sighing to yourself you sat up in the bed deciding that hiding from Changbin wouldn't be the most mature thing to do in this situation so you wanted to go and see him, at least try and talk this all over with him. Smooth things out at least. You changed into another pair of jeans and an oversized button-up that was in the bottom of your bag and headed for the stairs finding your ankle perfectly fine to walk on today, unlike the previous days when you could barely use it.

"Changbin?" You called out nervously as you reached the bottom to see that he wasn't around, the living room was empty and there were no signs of him in the kitchen. Nothing but a plate and a used mug in the sink that was waiting to be washed up.

"Changbin?" You walked out to the front door checking to see if he was in the garage but the doors were shut and locked and Dave was missing so he'd most likely gone out somewhere but you didn't know where that was. 

As you made your way back towards the kitchen there was a small note on the coffee machine you hadn't seen before, 

One of your parts was missing, went out to Seoul to get it. Won't be home until late, food in the fridge, Lix said he'll come round after 11. See you later x

The small kiss on the end of the handwritten note gave you hope that he wasn't mad about whatever happened the night before between you. The almost kiss lingering in your head as you thought back on the market incident. Maybe there was hope for you both yet but your stomach was still in a nervous spin as you realised he'd left you alone with not much to do. There was an hour before Lix would be arriving so you were going to do the best you could to get something to eat in the house and then clean up. It was the least you could do since Changbin was letting you stay here for free this whole time. Trying to distract yourself from thinking about Changbin the whole time, there was no use sitting around and crying over a boy.

"Changbin wasn't kidding when he said you could sing, huh?" Felix laughed as he walked right into the house. The whole house was filled with loud music, he heard it as he pulled into the driveway. You'd been playing it for the last hour as you cleaned up the house. It wasn't as though it was unnecessarily dirty, just random stains you knew how to fix. 

Felix placed the key he had into his jacket pocket and walked further into the home, taking off his shoes not wanting to mess it up. The boys all had their own key to both the house and the garage, Changbin made them make copies for whenever he was away and needed them to come and look after the place for a couple of days.

"Ah! Hi!" You yelled as you got up from the floor turning off the music so you would be able to talk to one another without yelling at each other. 

"Hey! I brought you guys some more cookies, I even had Sengmin whip us something up for dinner." He placed the containers into the fridge and walked over to you to see what you had been doing. That was when he noticed that the stain in front of the kitchen sink was gone. Chan had dropped some oil a few years ago and it ended up seeping into the small grooves of the floor. 

Felix greeted you with a hug although you hadn't known him longer than half a day you already felt close with him. In fact, you felt close to all of the boys which were nice since you'd never had that kind of friendship before. Everyone back home just sort of tolerated one another, put up with each other for the sake of the town since it was only small and there were only so many people around. Yet another reason to stay away. There everyone knew one another, here they did too but it didn't seem as toxic as it did back home.

"Thank you, Changbin loves your cookies. I haven't tried them yet but if they're anything like your cakes though I'm sure I'll gain a few pounds while I have the last few days here." Felix frowned as you spoke about leaving. From what he'd gotten from Changbin the day before you were starting to like your time in Busan, which made him and the boys wondered if you would be staying. It wasn't uncommon for people to visit and plan to stay in the future.

"Last days?" He tried to bring it up casually as you both walked over to the sofa to talk for a while but you knew why he was asking. 

"I have to go home right? I can't stay with Changbin all the time...There aren't really any places for me to stay other than here..." You trailed off slowly not knowing if Chan had told anyone else that you admitted your feelings for Changbin to him yesterday. Felix smiled softly at you as he looked at you.

"Chan told me that you might have a crush on him," You scoffed at his words, 'crush' was one of the biggest oversimplifications you could have used. It made you feel as though you were back in school and had a crush on one of the popular kids.

"That would be the understatement of the year." Felix sighed at you when he saw the look on your face, it looked as though you were really upset about something and he wanted to know what it was that was on your mind.

"What happened? Minho said that he saw you and Changbin with Flair but-"

"We almost kissed when she interrupted then when we got back to the house I sort of - maybe kind of...Snapped at him for something that wasn't his fault," You dramatically rolled back to lay on the grey sofa, closing your eyes and groaning about how if you could do it over you would. Felix met you with a breathy chuckle as he looked over at you laying down on the sofa with your eyes closed.

"You could talk it through with him...Tell him how you feel? I mean after the almost kiss it means he confirms his feelings for you." Forcing your eyes open you stared up at Felix, you had so many questions you wanted to ask him but you didn't know if he would be comfortable with answering them. Changbin was his friend, Felix wasn't yours you had to remember that. 

"You're worried about Flair right? If you are you have nothing to be worried about... From what I heard Changbin set her straight yesterday." To distract yourself a little you walked to the kitchen to make you both a hot drink to have together. Trying not to make it seem like you were prying for too much information. 

"Set her straight?" You wondered if that was why he had been so tense the night before and hadn't spoken in the truck ride home. Not that you did anything to help aid that either, you could have just as easily spoken to him too you just choose not to. Deciding it would be better to sit in a dull silence rather than talk it out like the adults you both were.

"From what we heard, Flair isn't planning on sticking around in Busan much longer. Then last night Changbin gave her that little extra nudge to move." You looked at Felix with a raised eyebrow handing him his mug of hot coffee as you sat down beside him on the sofa once again. Pulling your knees into your chest as you stared at him, 

"Was Flair his first love? Was that why he put up with so much from her?" As much as he didn't want to talk about his friend behind his back he thought it would be important for you to know it. Since you'd expressed your interest in Changbin and it was clear to him and the boys Changbin liked you back. 

"They were each other's first love, Changbin had been crushing on Flair Hard. For years. I'm talking since we were in little school to high school..."

The story went on until Felix had told you the ins and outs of the relationship. The first time Flair had cheated until the last time when Changbin finally had enough of it all and called it all to an end. She'd been the worst of the worst for him and it took him so long to realise it. Felix took off not long before nine that night so you just began watching a film on the TV. The plan was to wait for Changbin to come in so you could greet him and talk everything over but it wasn't panning out that way since your eyes were getting harder to keep open with each passing second. 

Changbin walked into the house to find you asleep on the sofa a movie running on the screen while there was a mug of half-drunken coffee on the coffee table. He grinned to himself as he quietly dropped the truck keys on the table and stepped over to you, looking over your face while you snuggled into the sofa. You were covered by a small blanket while clutching a small stuffed toy in your arms he'd never seen it before so he could only assume you'd brought it along with you,

"Cute." He whispered to himself as you scrunched your face up in your sleep dreaming of something that wasn't nice by the looks of it. 

"Come here," He whispered to himself once again, taking the blanket off of your body before lifting you up into his arms just like he'd done that second night you'd stayed over. He couldn't expect you to sleep on the coach given how uncomfortable it was, he watched your face as he walked carefully up the staircase to your room. Being careful not to drop you as he walked towards the bedroom you were staying in.

"Changbin," He froze in place as he reached the door of your bedroom, he'd just tucked you into the double bed and was about to leave when you called out his name. 

"Y/n?" He glanced back at you and sighed when he saw that you were still fast asleep on the bed, mumbling his name to yourself. He was sure he could run a hover around the room and you would still be out cold. He shook his head while laughing softly at the sight of you, then he sighed to himself making himself leave the room as he thought about everything. The almost kiss in the market. The ranting text messages he had sitting in his phone from the boys complaining about how he had dealt with everything. Including a string of new messages from Felix updating him on what had happened in the house.

Felix: She's caught up on this whole almost kiss...You should tell her how you feel...

Felix: I'm leaving. She's going to try and stay awake to talk to you. Talk to her. She'll be good for you, you know it, the boys know it and I know it

Changbin ignored them though, throwing his phone onto the sofa as he looked around the kitchen. The boys were always on his case about moving on so this was nothing new from them but he didn't need the pressures of everyone else around him on top of him as well as his own pressures about you. As he walked further into the kitchen he noticed that the usual oil stain on the floor was gone...He'd been trying to get that out for years and you'd only been here a few days and it vanished? He was going to need your secret that or he needed you to stay around forever to be his personal stain remover. Who was he kidding? He wanted you to stay around because having you there had made him happier than he had been in the longest time. Anyone with a functioning brain and two eyes could tell that. He groaned to himself as he thought about how rude he had been, he should have offered to take you to Seoul with him, there was no reason for him to have been out all day either. He'd wasted so much time in the City just trying to avoid coming home to the weird tension that had been in the air the previous night.

The next morning Changbin had woken up first - as he always did - and headed out to your car to start working on it. Working on cars was the only thing he could do to help clear his mind and help him say the things he needed to say without them coming out as complicated, fixing cars helped him focus.

When you woke up and saw him out of the window you knew it was now or never, you had to speak to him. He was working on your car so you only had a couple of hours to get yourself to talk to him, starting with a hot drink. In your mindset, no one could be mad or upset if you brought them a hot drink. That and it would give you that tiny bit longer of procrastination while you worked out what on earth you were going to say to him when you went out there.

"I-I made you a drink." You whispered as you brought him out a mug of tea with the biscuits that Felix brought round the day before.

"Lix baked fresh cookies so I brought them out too." You mumbled to him as you set the small tray down on one of the empty workbenches not knowing how else to pluck up a conversation. No words came from him as he continued working in the back of your car, glancing over at you when you weren't looking. Today you were dressed in a pair of dark blue denim overalls and a white button-up which made him smile at the thought of you both looking alike, but he went back to the car ignoring the sweet thoughts he was having about you as he continued his work. He still had no idea what it was he wanted to say to you. If he should bring up the kiss or if he was just supposed to ignore the whole thing had happened.

"Look I was hoping-" You stopped talking when someone knocked on the wooden doors of the garage interrupting you, you both glanced over to see the delivery man holding a box for Changbin.

"Drop it anywhere, thanks, man." The box said had a brand of spray paint on the side which the delivery man dropped over by the doors.  

"I was hoping that we could talk about the other day-" You'd tried to start once the delivery man was gone but Changbin cut you off this time. He began talking about the car instead of looking at you, staring into the engine as he tried to talk.

"It'll be done by tomorrow at the latest. You'll be out of here before you know it." He didn't even look at you while he spoke it pissed you off more than it probably should have. That he didn't even have the guts to look you in the face while he toyed around with your feelings like this.

"Changbin I wasn't talking about the car-" You tried to speak once again but just like before he cut you off.

"I just need to get an oil change and some stuff, let it settle. You'll be out of my hair by morning." The wording of his sentence pierced you both in place like a deer caught in headlights, your heart thumped against your chest as he told you what he thought about you. Changbin put down the wrench he was using and slowly looked over at you to try and assess the situation. Your eyes were starting to fill with tears as you thought over what he had said. 'Out of my hair' was he sick of you already? Did the boys read him wrong and he didn't like you back at all?

"Out of your hair, r-right...Okay." You stuttered out as you tried not to burst out into tears right there and then, trying to leave the comment alone but it kept repeating itself over and over in your head. Anger began to bubble up inside of you as you thought about it longer and longer,

"You offered me to stay...If it was that big a deal you could have told me to go...I-I could have found a hotel-" He cut you off trying to explain why he'd said what he'd said.

"I didn't mean it, I was just-" This time you cut him off,

"Just what? Because it sounded to me like you meant it! What's your problem? We went from almost kissing to you ignoring me, passing me off as nothing but a visitor and claiming I'm in your hair!?" It came out more of a question than you throwing accusations at him, he licked his lips as he began to feel the guilt coming onto him. He hadn't meant it all, he was just trying to push you away. Pushing people away was easier for him than to accept they were willing to stay with him.

"If I'm that big a deal I'll leave now!" You knew yelling wasn't going to solve anything in this situation but you couldn't help but feel mad at him. You turned to leave out of the garage doors when he seized your wrist in his grasp, stopping you from leaving him there.

"I didn't mean I wanted you to leave..." His voice was coming out calmer now as he looked at you, trying not to hold back the feelings he could feel rushing to the surface. It scared him that he was finally starting to feel something stronger than he had for Flair all those years ago and now he was going to have to admit it out loud it worried him. He didn't want the thing that had happened in the past to repeat themselves.

"Then what is your problem? You've been so-" This time it wasn't Changbin cutting you off with his words...He smashed his lips against yours. Instantly it was as if the fight had melted away from you, you couldn't remember what you were mad at him for, all that matter now was that he was kissing you deeply. Your arms wrapped around the back of his neck as you stood up on your tiptoes to deepen the kiss, Changbin smirked against your lips. Biting down on your lower one so he could gain access, pushing his tongue into your mouth as he made out with you. Your lips mouthing in sync with one another as you finally got the dream kiss you'd been wanting this whole time. Changbin's arms snaked around your waist, luring you closer to him as he made out with you on the spot.

"N-No, not here." He whispered as you began to run your hands up his shirt. He had to remember you were both in the middle of the garage, anyone could walk in and he didn't want that. He kissed both of your hands as he pulled them out from under his tank top, then he kissed down your neck, pulling you in the direction of the house instead.

Clothes were strewn around the bedroom as you both rushed to undress one another, you bit down on your lip taking in all of his body in one look.

"Like what you see baby? You couldn't get enough the other day." Changbin teased you as he thought back on the morning you'd seen him in nothing but a towel, you whined at him before pushing him to lay down on the bed.

"Can you blame me? Look at you." You purred as you bit down on his bottom lip dragging it down as you then began to kiss down his neck, leaving a small mark as your lips travelled. Kissing down every inch of his body until you got to his boxers. Despite him still having his underwear on you could already tell how large he was from the tent in his boxers. Your mouth watered as you looked up at him, taking your hand and palming him through the thin black fabric. His lips parted to let out a low grunt as his head rolled back against the pillows of his bed, no one except for him had done this in such a long time he'd almost forgotten what it felt like.

"Oh shit." He whispered breathlessly as you continued to palm him slowly not knowing if he wanted it faster or not since you'd never discussed this before. Biting down on your lip your eyes were fixated on his erection, you pulled down his boxers and bit down on your lip you watched as his cock sprang up to his lower abdomen.

"Y-You don't have to-" Changbin was cut off when he let out a loud moan as you took the head of his cock into your mouth, swirling your tongue around the head while you looked up at him. His head was rolled back against the pillows with his eyes screwed shut, he was in ecstasy with every small kitten licks you were giving to him. Taking in some air you took all of his cock until he filled your mouth and hit the back of your throat. Scrunched your eyes shut you continued to bob your head around him, moaning whenever he would hit the back of your throat.

"Fuck Y/n. You're doing s-so good, oh fuck!" He grunted as he bucked up into the back of your throat. You hummed around him as he pulled your hair out of your face, staring at you to make sure this was okay.

"F-Feels so fucking good." He moaned out as he began fucking into your throat, his cock pushing in and out periodically making you gag around him but you did your best to keep your gags to a minimum wanting to please him. His grip on the back of your head tightened as he continued before letting go and letting you catch your breath, you pulled off and began pumping him.

"Look at you," He moaned out sitting up slowly as he ran his thumb over your bottom lip making you suck the string of saliva and precum from it.

"So fucking hot." He grunted out as you stared up at him, taking him back into your mouth and all the way to the back of your throat until you gagged again.

"Ugh shit," He moaned out as you began bobbing your head up and down around him, he could feel the smirk on your lips as you continued to take him into your mouth. You moaned out around him as you reached down to rub yourself through your panties, you hadn't realised just how wet you were getting from the ordeal.

"Do you want some attention now baby?" He cooed looking down at you as he removed his cock from your throat. You looked up at him with parted lips, nodding slowly. Changbin chuckled bending down to pick you up and lay you on the bed,

"Look at you," He whispered to you as he slowly pulled down the black lace panties yo were wearing and watch your arousal slowly stick to them. He chuckled darkly before kissing each of your thighs. Shyly you pressed your thighs together trying to hide from him but he spread them apart, kissing up to your core.

"You're beautiful, you don't need to hide." He promised you as he bit down softly on the fleshy part of your outer labia humming against your skin as you moaned.

"I've not even started yet," He chuckled before plunging his tongue between your folds, lapping over your clit as you bucked up against his mouth. Crying out his name as you screwed your eyes shut. Changbin chuckled against your core amused by the sounds you were letting out.

"You sound so good." He whispered to you as he continued pushing his tongue in and out of you, sucking on your clit whenever he wanted to. He laid your legs over his shoulders, pulling you to the edge of the bed to have better access to you.

"C-Changbin!" You gripped onto his black locks pushing him deeper into you as you began to feel dizzy from the feeling of him pleasuring you. Your toes were starting to cur as you felt your orgasm getting closer and closer with each flick of his tongue. Your mind was starting to go blank as he continued to fuck his tongue into you.

"C-Close." You whimpered as you looked down at him not knowing if he wanted you to cum on his tongue or not but the small pull on your waist as he stared into your eyes gave you all the confirmation you needed. He gripped onto your hips with one hand before pushing two fingers into you and began pumping them in and out of you. You screamed out as his name as your walls clenched around his digits tipping you closer to the edge.

"Fuck! C-Changbin please," You whimpered as you began to cry out his name, he continued with his thrusting fingers and he hummed against your core.

"F-Fuck!" You cried out as your cunt began to spasm out of control, clenching and unclenching around his fingers as your orgasm ripped through you. You were letting out loud desperate moans of his name as you bucked up into his mouth cumming on his fingers and tongue.

"Good girl," He whispered as he pulled his fingers from you, licking them clean as he kissed back up to your lips. Making out with you on the bed as he ground his hips down against your core, you wrapped your legs around his waist as you kissed him back.

"N-Need you," You whispered to him as you began pumping him in your hand between his legs, he looked at you nervously as reality began to set in. He had no condoms in the house since he'd not had any need for them the last couple of years.

"I-I'm on the pill and I'm clean," You whispered to him as though you could read his brain.

"M-Me too...N-Not that I'm on the pill that I'm clean-" You cut him off by kissing him again and giggling softly at how stuttery he was for someone who had just been eating you out like it was his last meal.

"Shh," You whispered to him as you began to line the head of his cock up with your entrance, running the tip over your core as you moaned out. He groaned out when he got himself wet with your juices,

"S-So fucking wet for me," He smirked going back to his previous attitude around you he continued to tease himself and you as he ran his cock over your opening.  Pushing his hips forward until he sunk all the way into you making you cry out in pleasure and tilt your head back. Every inch of him was filling you up, you could feel him at your hilt.

Once he knew you were adjusted to his size he began to slowly push in and out of you, holding onto your hips as he made out with you lovingly.

"Mmm f-fuck," You cried out as your eyes screwed shut. His hips began to pick up speed as you dug your nails into his back.

"Y-You can go faster," Panted as you pulled away from the kiss, biting down on his neck urging him to snap his hips in and out of you. He grunted lowly as he positioned his hands either side of your head giving you the full view of the arms you'd dreamt over. His cock felt incredible inside of you, slamming in and out as he continued to piston his hips vigorously. You felt complete there with him, with his cock filling you up and every moan of your name that fell from his lips.

"I-I've been dreaming of this since the day you came here," He admitted as he continued to thrust into you, kissing down your neck as he held dug his hands into the pillows.

"M-Me too," You whimpered back to him tilting your head so he could have better access to your neck.

You were squirming and crying underneath him with every thrust, your heels digging into his ass as you tried to get him deeper inside of you as if it was even possible. It already felt as though he was rearranging your guts, you knew it wouldn't be long until you were cumming again.

"So fucking good." You mewled out as you looked at him, stuttering out the words as you lost the ability to speak the pleasure inside of you making your brain go numb. Changbin smirked as he began to fuck into you harder, moving his hands to hold your hips down to give him more leverage. Gripping onto your skin as he slammed into you, your screams filled the air with the sounds of your skin slapping together and wetness.

"Changbin!" You screamed out, gripping onto his huge biceps as he continued to fuck into you. Only getting encouraged from your moans, he looked into your eyes and chuckled. He could see how close you were getting,

"Close?" He questioned as he continued to slam into you, leaning down to kiss you sweetly, you nodded at him and grunted into your neck when he felt you clench around him.

"Cum for me," He whispered as he began to slam into you once again. Causing you both to cry out as your walls contracted around him. The walls of your cunt squeezed around him tightly as you felt your orgasm rip through you, Changbin moaned out loudly as he continued to fuck you through it.

You moaned out again when you felt him twitch inside of you pushing himself into place as he came into you, holding onto your hips as you kiss his cheeks and nose.

"S-Shit," You both breathed out heavily as he pulled out of you and laid down beside you on the bed both of you panting as you began to giggle softly turning your head to look at him.

"I-If it wasn't obvious before...I like you a lot." You giggled at him and he moaned out at the cheesiness of it.

"I like you too," He whispered as he linked your hands together on the bed, bringing your hand up to his lips as he gently laid a small kiss on it.

Changbin fed you strawberries as you laid on the sofa, you were dressed in one of his flannel shirts while he wore some shorts around the house.

"Open," You parted your lips waiting for the fruit and he smiled bending down to kiss your lips gently when he placed the fruit into your mouth you made sure to suck on his fingers and smirk up at him.

"What?" You giggled innocently and he shook his head,

"The real question is, are you ready?" You frowned at what he meant,

"Ready for what?" He began leaning down to you and kissed your lips, running his hands between your thighs and chuckling.

"Round 2." He chuckled evilly as he pulled you into a deep kiss, discarding the strawberries onto the table as he pulled you up to sit on his lap.

Humming to yourself as you rolled over you expected to find Changbin laying in the sheets with you but you were met by a cold empty bed, the sheets were cold so he'd clearly been out of bed for some time. You let out a whine as you thought about the night before, gripping onto the sheets around your body as the memories came flooding back to you. Round 1,2...3..4..eventually ending at 8 when Changbin couldn't keep going on or keep up but now the bed was empty you were confused as to where he could be. There was no note by the nightstand and his clothes were gone so you just assumed he'd gone back to working out front so you decided to surprise him. You slipped out of the sheets and walked over to the shirt of his you'd been wearing the night before and slipped into it, along with some panties and a pair of your short heading for the stairs. If he was outside working you would just take him a morning cup of tea and greet him with a small kiss, nothing seemed more romantic than that right now. Apart from maybe having Changbin back in bed where he could hold you for longer, you already missed his touch and longed for him to have his arms around you again. 

"Morning, I made you a cup of tea..." You said to Changbin as you walked into the garage, he was covered in light blue paint, oil and sweat so he'd clearly been out here longer than you had originally thought. He was washing his hands on a towel when he came to face you, looking down at the towel instead of up at you.

"Why are you covered in paint?" You giggled as you handed him the warm mug of tea, taking in the appearance of his - what you assumed was originally a nice white tank top but now stained blue and black. He took the mug without looking at you and placed it down onto the table. He hadn't looked at you once which was starting to make you worry. 

"I erm...I finished the car." He mumbled to you, walking in the direction of the garage doors. You frowned wondering which car he was talking about when you noticed the blue colour that he was covered in matched the same colour as your car but, you hadn't asked him for a paint job.  

"Mine?" Your voice cracked as you questioned him. He began walking out of the garage nodding his head at you while he rooted through his pockets for something. You could hear all of the keys jingling around inside of there so he was probably looking for yours.

"I woke up at 2 am and I couldn't sleep so I just came and finished it. You can leave whenever you want." His voice was coming out cold as he spoke. You stared down at the floor he walked out without even so much as a glance at you, your heart was thumping against your chest. 

Had the previous night's events meant nothing to him or had they completely slipped his mind? You felt the pit in your stomach begin to grow as you thought about him wanting to leave even after the night before. He told you he liked you, you spent the night together, kissing hugging, making love and talking with one another until you finally fell asleep with your head on his chest. It had been all you could think about since the moment you woke up and now that he was just brushing it under the carpet as though it happened all of the time for him. You worried if that was all it was to him, nothing but a one-night stand for him to shake off and leave. You hoped it wasn't but the ground felt as though it was pulling you into it with each passing second he had his back to you without mentioning the night. 

"Do you want me to leave?" Your voice came out hoarse as you did your best not to cry right in front of him, the one thing you didn't want to do was influence his decision on letting you stay by your emotions. Changbin stared forward at your freshly painted car that was waiting for you to go of course he didn't want you to go. He wanted you to stay right here in his arms for as long as humanly possible but the thought of making you stay when you had so many plans to finish your road trip tore him apart. He didn't want to be the one to cut your dream short, he'd seen how happy and excited you were about the road trip, he wasn't going to be the one to ruin that.

"You have things to do. I have things to do." He said emotionlessly as he turned around to see you standing there in his shirt. His heart lept up at the sight of you in his clothes but then he noticed the tears welling up in your eyes as they began to turn red. 

"R-Right...Yeah." You stuttered out blinking the tears away as you stared down at the ground, brushing your face off with your hands. He came closer to you to give you the keys to your car you snatched them from him rather quickly so you wouldn't have to look at him any longer, 

"I'll pay you...T-Then grab my stuff." You mumbled to him as you felt your heart begin to ache with each passing moment he stared at you blankly. He pushed down the guilt he was feeling towards you all of the emotions he was feeling towards you and nodded his head. 

"Sure. I'll write up the receipts for everything. The paint job was free." He grumbled as he walked past you without batting an eyelid, only confirming to you that last night had meant nothing to him. Sighing to yourself you began walking back to the house as quickly as you could not turning to look at him. Changing out of his shirt and putting on your own clothes. 

Changbin stared down at his hands as he wrote down on the pieces of paper you would need for your insurance company, he couldn't help but feel awful for what he was doing to you but you deserved better than this. Better than him. He closed up the garage doors since it was closed for the day.

Felix: Get Y/n to come into the town when you've finished her car, I have cookies for her and you. It'll let her put the car to good use. Sighing to himself he locked his phone and looked over his shoulder, you were storming over to your car with tears gushing down your face. He already felt terrible for everything he was doing but he knew if he stopped you from leaving he would feel even worse. There was nothing worse on this planet than having your heart broken or your dreams cut short. Changbin had no idea that he was doing both of those with one swift action.

"Felix said he wants you to stop by town, he has some snacks," Changbin said as he brought over your receipt, you didn't say anything as you signed your details onto the form scribbling a signature along the bottom line and giving the pad back to him. Changbin frowned as he noticed it was yours and not some random insurance company that you were with. 

"What?" You questioned looking at the expression on his face as you shut the hood of your car, taking the keys round to the driver's side door and opening it.

"Insurance companies pay for repairs, not people..." He whispered as he looked from the papers and up to your face. 

"Not on mine. The car is too old." Your replies were coming out short and abrupt, Changbin didn't blame you since he was the reason you were upset in the first place. 

"So where are you going next on your road trip?" He was doing his best to come across pleasant but you pulled you shook your head at him. 

"Into town. Home. Can't afford the trip anymore and it seems like nothing is keeping me in Busan." You pushed yourself into the car avoiding eye contact with Changbin as you started up the engine resisting the temptation to tell him how great she sounded now. Changbin's heart fell into the pit of his stomach as he realised that you were just going to go home. Somewhere you had expressed multiple times that you didn't like and didn't want to go back to. 

"Can I go now? Is the paperwork okay?" You questioned as you stared at him, he nodded slowly and you began backing out of the drive, ignoring the urge inside of you to look at him before leaving. 

Changbin:: I fucked up. Make her come back, tell her she forgot something! Tell her to come back! Do something. Anything. You guys are good at lying! Changbin sent the text to the huge group chat that all of the boys were in and he panicked as he began to think of losing you forever. He didn't have a way of contacting you, your number wasn't on any of the paperwork just your name. He figured you would finish your road trip and move on but now that he knew you were just going to go back home he began to feel his heartbreak.

Changbin: Seriously this isn't a drill guys I need you to make her stay!!! He hit send followed by five of the siren emojis to show that this was an emergency and that they needed him t help fix this as soon as possible but none of them was replying to the messages. Just reading them without a word in response to him. 

Hyunjin was the first to see, followed by Felix and Chan who were no doubt together at the markets which meant they could do something to help out. Fear began to set in as Changbin wondered if he could race into town after you and talk to you himself but he needed to stay here, in case with some kind of miracle the boys convinced you to come back.

Two hours later Changbin was sitting in his living still waiting for a response from one of the boys when his phone finally began to ping his text notification sound. He hadn't been able to sit still since the moment you left the drive. He'd been pacing back and forth having arguments in his own head about how he should have just told you to stay in the first place, there was no need for him to push you away when all of the signs pointed to you wanting to stay in the first place.

Felix: She won't stay. Says she's heading into Seoul for a few hours to sightsee? Maybe you can catch her? That was all Changbin needed just a chance, he could get to Seoul within four hours and make this all up to you. Fix everything and prove to you that this wasn't just a one night stand to him that the whole thing had meant more to him that he was letting on. Racing over to the door he grabbed the keys for his truck and began to rush out of the door, dropping the keys five times before he finally got into the truck and started it up. He would get to Seoul in four hours or less even if it resulted in some kind of speeding ticket he didn't care. All he cared about was seeing you one last time even if you yelled at him or cried at him for what he was doing he wanted to see you. Convince you to stay in Busan, with him...for as long as you wanted to.

Dropping the keys onto the table Changbin wanted to scream out in frustration. He'd gone into the city to try and find you but it was impossible since he didn't have your number and you hadn't told the boys the exact places you were going to go. He'd gone to every possible tourist place he could think of but you were nowhere to be seen so he headed home in defeat. Ringing the boys to try and get answers but none of the boys were replying or calling him back. 

"Why the long face?" Changbin's heart jumped as he heard your voice come out of nowhere, you were standing in the kitchen pouring boiling water into eight different cups that were in front of you. He had been so lost in his own mind he hadn't even seen you walking around the house with the rest of the boys, all of them doing their own jobs in the kitchen and living room. As you poured out the water you turned to look at Felix,

"Lix can you get another mug?" You called out behind you but Changbin was just staring at you with wide eyes, trying to figure out if this was some kind of dream he was having but he didn't remember falling asleep. Maybe that he'd crashed on the way home and this was some kind of weird coma dream he was having about you. 

"Jesus, you look like you've seen a ghost mate." Chan sarcastically called out as he walked into the house from the back garden looking around for some oil and the plate of meat Jisung was supposed to be prepared. 

"What are you all doing here?" Changbin didn't mean for it to come out cold but he was confused as to what was going on around him, all of the boys were just chilling in the house. He stared at them all but his eyes went straight back to you as you looked up at him.

"I invited them over, I figured we could have a barbeque together. Chan brought his own, insisting it was better than the rust bucket you have sitting out there-" You mentioned as you walked over to Changbin, handing him the mug of tea as you smiled up at him.

"I agree by the way, why did you let it get so rusty?" You groaned at the thought of cooking food on something like that but Changbin stared at you as he shook his head, ignoring your question. 

"I thought you left." He whispered confusingly, discarding the mug onto the table beside him and cupping your face in his hands as though you were the only ones in the room together. He ran his thumbs under your eyes and licked his lips as he resisted the temptation to kiss you.

"I did, I went to the markets and Felix showed me your many...many...many texts," You whispered to him putting an emphasis on 'many' since it hadn't just been two that Changbin sent to them all. When the boys began reading and not replying to him he began writing out essays about how he felt about you. Leaving out no details about why he wanted you to stay and how he needed you to come back to him. 

"But I wanted to get back at you for making me feel bad...So I made them tell you I was out in the city while we came back here for this." You gestured around you as you looked around the boys who were all staring at you both waiting to see what would happen next. Changbin shook his head at you knowing he deserved a lot worse than just going into the city on a pointless goose chase. 

"I don't deserve you," He whispered as he looked down into your eyes, leaning forward to kiss you. His eyes fluttered shut along with yours as your lips were about to touch when Jeongin cleared his throat. Standing beside you as he held out a bowl of potato chips for you to take some from, tapping the sides of the glass dish as he waited patiently.

"Kind of...Having a moment here-" Changbin nodded between you both but you grabbed the chips and smiled up at him innocently, 

"I have to go and help cook. Go and change, you smell like oil and sweat." Tapping his chest playfully you headed out to the back yard where Chan was waiting for you to start grilling some meat with him. Felix smirked at Changbin who was staring off after you, only now did he realise you were back in the shirt from that morning. You had it tied around your midway as you paired it with some high waisted shorts, you looked amazing in anything but so much better in his clothes. 

"I like her, she makes you work for what you want." Felix chuckled as he passed Changbin to head towards the back yard turning back to look at Changbin who was still a little lost on everything happening, 

"She's right though, you stink." He called out right before going out of the door and greeting Chan and you with a hug. 

Later that night when the boys were all passed out asleep in their spots on the sofa and the floor you were in the kitchen cleaning up the dishes. You wanted them to rest while you did the washing up since most of this had been your idea. Changbin walked up behind you snaking his arms around your waist and putting his head in the crook of your neck. He could feel your pulse began to quick against his lips as he placed a small and innocent kiss on your skin. 

"I'm sorry," It was the first time he had said sorry to you for everything all night. You'd spoken to one another about other things but you never had enough privacy to talk about the one thing that was on his mind the one thing he needed to talk to you about. 

"I never should have pushed you away...It was wrong." He admitted, looking at you in the small mirror above the sink, your eyes met as you smiled softly at him telling him it was fine with your eyes. He placed another kiss on your neck and you bit down on your lip trying to concentrate on the dishes rather than the way his lips were making you feel. 

"I'm here now, aren't I?" You whispered to him as you drained the water from the sink turning around in his arms and wrapping yours around the back of his neck. He ignored the water trickling down the back of his shirt as he stared into your eyes. He had no idea how he was going to make up for what he'd done to you but, he was going to do whatever it took every day for the rest of his life if he had to.

"I never want you to leave again," He mumbled to you as he looked over at the boys, one of them was mumbling in their sleep as they turned over on the bed. Jisung snoring loudly, too loudly as though he was faking it so Changbin looked at you,

"Let's go somewhere we can talk privately." He pulled his arms away from your waist and took your hand into his, leading you up to the bedroom so you could talk without whispering or fear of being listened in on by some of the boys. 

Laying beside him on the bed you let your head lay on his chest listening to the way his heart thumped against his chest as he drew patterns into your skin with his fingers. Neither of you had said anything since coming up the stairs twenty minutes ago, you just laid together in a comfortable silence just listening to one another's breathing. Enjoying the company you gave one another.

"I never would have pushed you away if I'd have known you weren't going to go on your trip...I didn't want to be the reason you stopped your road trip or your dreams..." He broke the silence as he said the same thing he had told the boys over their messages. He knew you already knew all of this but he wanted to tell you face to face. He owed you that. 

"I pushed you away the first time because I was scared of what happened with Flair happening again...That night we spent together meant more to me than I could ever begin to tell you." His heart was beginning to beat faster as he told you everything that had been planning on his mind over the last couple of days. The truth spilling out of his lips like a tap that couldn't be shut off.

"Changbin you don't have to-"

"I want to." He stared down into your eyes as he sat you both up, sitting across from you as he stared back into your eyes. Crossing your legs you looked at him smiling weakly, you were getting tired from the night before and being up all day.

"For the first time in a long time, I've felt myself getting happier...To be honest for the last few days being with you has made me feel like I'm floating on a cloud." You laughed softly at the words he was using and he smiled, your laugh was like music to his ears he would listen to it all day if he could and would do anything to make you laugh. 

"When Flair interrupted that kiss at the market it made me realise just how much I liked you. Before I would drop everything and go running back to her but with you it's different. You've taken over my heart and you're the only one who runs it now." You looked at him, your eyes were starting to tear up as he spoke exactly what was going on in his mind.

"I got scared. I pushed you away but I promise never to do it again if you promise to stay?" You looked at him turning your head to the side as if you were going to challenge him on what he was saying to you. You licked your lips slowly,

"Make me stay." You whispered softly to him challenging him as the corners of your mouth turned up into a smirk, he smirked back at you. Cupping your face in his hands before bringing you into a loving kiss just like the one from the night before, running his thumbs over your face. Sparks came flying from your body as soon as he touched you and your mind went blank, you wrapped your arms around the back of his neck as you rose onto your knees to deepen the kiss with him. Falling down to lay on top of him on the mattress as you both made out, slowly letting one another remove each other's clothes until you were in nothing but your underwear. It was going to be the best new start in a new town you'd ever had, you couldn't wait to spend the rest of your life there with him.

Tagline: @taestannie​ @kneel-begyourpardon​ @channiewoo​ @minholuvs​ @lkwonmj​