#we really did end up getting a hot kip summer this year and im so thankful 💜

[the-kipsabian]

@giftober 2024 | Day 24: "summer time"

[paepsi]

EXO as dumb shit I’ve done, EXPLAINED:

Suho: 

See this picture here? This is me before the moving team. I was so fucking proud of myself for strapping the base of the chair to my roof (it wouldn’t fit through the trunk of me smol hatchback). I thought it was funny that it kinda looked like a kip-pah and asked my friend to take a pic for me here (see my lil peace sign next to my face? im v happy of my jew car). Little did I know that after driving to my new apartment with the whole moving team from IKEA unloading shit from the truck, I would be stuck in the fucking car. I didn't have a knife or scissors to cut the strings and I didn't want to make my dumb assery to be noticed; so instead of asking for help... I climbed out the front window and almost fell flat on my ass. When I stood up and turned around, the whole moving team was just standing there looking at me. The assholes knew I was stuck and let me suffer.

Kris & Kai:

so these moments both happened in the same night. I went to a house warming party for my friend and I didn't know what to bring as a gift, so I just bought two big bags of Hawaiian bread. Now throughout the night, the more I drink, the more impulsive I get. 

I started putting the bread on people's shoulders, slowly piling them up until they noticed. Everyone was pretty wasted so there was no surprise when I had a stack of 4 1/2 buns (I ate half) on my friends shoulder. Anyways- fast forward into the night, I'm craving sweets, so I walk into my friends kitchen and find a jar of cookies. At the time I thought it was a brilliant idea to just put the Hawaiian bread in there so the kitchen looked full; a fair exchange, if you will. At least that's what I thought... I found pictures from the party and it turns out I just ended up putting in a half eaten bun sjzjsj

Fast forward into the morning of the next day, I’m hungover and I wake up wearing mismatching socks (one is mine, the other I have no idea). 

I needed to get home because I had work later that day, so I hop into my car and start driving home. The whole time there was this annoying beeping sound that I couldn’t figure out where it was coming from. I had such a bad headache that I pulled over to see what the fuck was wrong. I got out of my car, checked the wheels, checked the under the hood, then hopped back inside. I was so frustrated that I banged my head on the steering wheel and just rested my eyes for a sec. When I opened them to look straight ahead at my dashboard, the brake light was glowing bright red. I cried.

Chanyeol: 

One summer evening, I was hanging with my sister and her friends around a campfire. We were roasting marshmallows, drinking, having a good time etc. Eventually later into the night we started getting bored and one of my sister’s friends suggested playing hot potato with the coals from the fire. We’re all game like FUCK YEAH LETS DO THIS. Then we start tossing it around and realize that it’s way too fucking hot, so instead of tossing it’s just everyone spiking the coal to the next person. FYI, I have terrible hand eye coordination and I wasn’t wearing my glasses that night. Every single time the coal was spiked my way it would miss my hand and fly straight into my hair. The next day I woke up, looked in the mirror, skipped breakfast and headed straight to the salon. still looked cute or w/e so I ain’t mad

Kyungsoo: 

Ahhhh, this one is actually pretty personal and happened not too long ago! My mom finally left this dirt bag she’d been married to for the past 16 years. When I say dirt bag, I mean a manipulative, abusive piece of shit. My mom was so tired during her session with the mediator for when they were deciding who was getting what; she took 30-45 minutes to talk alone with them and he took 3 fucking hours putting on this sick sob story. The mediator was so done with him too that they just let him do whatever he wanted. That meant he had the “right” to pick and choose what belonged to him in our apartment. The fucker took EVERYTHING. He took the furniture, the bedroom sets, all the electronics, the spices- HE DOESN’T EVEN COOK. However, a week before then, I bought a huge bottle of vanilla. I needed it to make edible cookie dough, which I was doing everyday out of stress. The day before he finally moved out, I came home from work to see everything wrapped/packed up. I started to get worked up and went to the kitchen to make my cookie dough. When I opened the cabinet to get my vanilla and saw it completely empty, I lost it. I literally screamed and started tearing up all the boxes, finding more shit that belonged to me and stopped when I finally found my vanilla. I went back to the kitchen, happily made my cookie dough and kicked back on "his” couch with my dirty shoes on. Later that night, the asshole came home and screamed at me. I shut him up tho when I told him I’d suffocate him with a pillow in his sleep if he dared to touch me or any of my things ever again. He didn’t stay in the apartment that night lol

Baekhyun:

I think this one might be my favorite story. It all started when a package from my mom in the mail never showed up even though the UPS tracking said it had already arrived on my doorstep. I assumed in meant the package was stolen and got really bummed about it since it had some essential items in there. My roommates felt bad and decided to cheer me up by throwing a house party (woohoo! cue the alcohol!). It started at like 3pm and went on all the way until 4 am the next day. Somewhere within that time frame while it was still light outside, slightly tipsy, I found a ladder on the side of the house and had a strong urge to follow it up to the top; and who am I to deny every desire that comes across my pea sized brain. I was half-way up to the roof when one of my roommates spotted me (let’s call him Big Ned; there were two guys named Ned in our house so we just called them Big Ned and Little Ned; Big Ned is like 6′3″ and Little Ned is like 5′4″). Big Ned started yelling at me to get down and I told him I couldn’t because it was my destiny to reach the top. He decided that there was no use arguing with me and ended up following me to the roof (even though he’s afraid of heights; bless his BFG heart). He’s kinda hard to miss, so when he started making his way up to the roof with me, it grabbed a lot of attention. Some joined us. Meanwhile, I decided to walk around and look into my neighbors yards. I saw a mess of papers in one of the alleys between our houses and joked “lmao that’d be funny if that was my package”. We laughed for a bit then looked a little closer until we realized oh fuck that’s my package. My body moved on it’s own and just kinda scrambled across the roof trying to figure out the fastest and least painful way to get off the roof. Thank the stars for Big Ben holding me back by the collar of my shirt and preventing me from jumping down onto the neighbors fence. Little Ben ended up running over and jumping the fence to get it for me. We still don’t know how it got there.

Tao:

In middle school, I had to go on this field trip to some ranch out in the countryside of Texas. I remember we were all huddled into a barn with a big stage in the back. The teachers grabbed a mic and got on stage to talk about who knows what. Idk I wasn’t paying attention, talking to my friend, in my own world. When the mics go off, everyone starts chattering. At that moment in time, I was extremely preoccupied with my shoelaces when I got a tap on my shoulder from my homeroom teacher. I think she was mad at me for not listening and told me to head up to the stage along with a few other students making their way over. Being in front of others makes me nervous, but when the teachers put a bib around my neck before I got on stage, I was too confused to think of anything else. When another teacher started handing out baby bottles filled with Gatorade to each student on stage, I had to stop them to ask what was going on. And what do ya know, I’m in a baby bottle drinking contest. Before I had time to ask any more questions, they were already counting down to start. Now listen, I’m not the type of person to back down from a challenge so ofc you know I’m gonna suck the soul out of this bich. The reason I can say this confidently is because up until I was 11 years old, I always drank out of baby bottles when I got home from school. I just really liked the feeling?? For me, nothing beat chilling on the couch, watching Teen Titans and drinking fresh cold orange juice from a baby bottle on a hot summer day. Idk but I guess it came in handy since I finished a 24oz bottle under 35 seconds. The rest of the kids weren’t even close to half way through. There’s a picture of me at the back of my school year book holding up the baby bottle like a trophy.

Sehun:

Remember my sisters friends from the campfire? Well I spent a good long summer hanging with her friend group and ended up getting kinda close to this one of the guys (let’s call him Jake). I have a really broad range of music taste and I guess he digged that so we talked a lot about music together. By the end of the summer, Jake threw a party at his house and invited me over. Ngl I wanted some dick so ofc I’m gonna go all out and break out my hot leather Madonna outfit. I head out with my sis and the house is packed by the time we get there. The whole time we’re pretty much just hanging out, drinking and dancing the night away. Some time passed 1 am (I think), I’m sorta outside making out with Jake on the side of his house. It’s getting really hot and heavy. When we finally broke apart for air, he told me he though he was in love with me. I’m screaming internally, panicking and I don’t know what to do. I could tell from way before that he really liked me, but I didn’t think it was to that extent. It doesn’t help exactly that I don’t feel the same way for him. Don’t get me wrong! He was really hot and sweet, but I just couldn’t see myself with him. So what did I tell him? Nothing. My dumb ass was in such a panic that all I could think of was that I needed to run. I did. I ran back into the house, out the front porch, spotted his skateboard and took off. I didn’t really know where I was or where I was going but somehow I ended up at the train station and eventually found my way back home.

Xiumin:

On my 21st birthday, my roommates took me out to a really nice, 5 star restaurant in the city we lived. They're buying me all the drinks I want cause heck I'm finally legal! Now, I think y'all can see a pattern of what happens when I drink. So when Big Ned got a glass of scotch and I had just finished off my last sip of wine, I wanted some too. I asked him to share, using "it's my birthday" to get my way. Ever the gentleman, Big Ben pours half his glass into my wine glass and keeps his raised for a cheers. The whole group joins in and with a shout of Mozeltov, I slam the wine glass down on the table and toss it back. It wasn't until I finished the last drop and tried to set my glass back on the table that I realized I snapped the stem in half. No one spoke, except for Little Ned, softly, "did you... did that really just happen?" Yeah. Yeah it did. Thankfully the restaurant agreed to keep the broken glass off the bill as long as I left the restaurant immediately.

Chen:

On a Saturday night, I met up with a good friend of mine that I hadn’t seen in months. We bought some snacks and drinks then drove to a marina near my apartment (new place in California). The whole night we spent catching up and throwing rocks in the water. I was still a little tipsy when it was time to go home and my friend ended up driving me back. On the way back, I opened a bag and snacked on some pizza flavored goldfish. I was about a fourth of the way through the bag when I decided I didn’t like it anymore and started tossing them out the window. We pull up to a stop light and my friend is trying to make me stop by rolling up the window, but I stick my leg out before he could close it. Next he tries to compromise and said if I wasn’t going to eat the goldfish, I should just put the bag down and remove my leg from the window. My tipsy ass told him no, I was handing out free food. I turned to look at the car next to me, asked (yelled) if they wanted any goldfish and held out the bag to them. I guess the dude thought it was funny and was just like “yeah sure why not, lifes too short to not eat goldfish from a stranger at a stoplight” alksdjflskdj 

Lay:

When I was about 6 years old, I lived out in the suburbs of Fulshear, Texas. The community is really tiny and everyone knew each other. One time, I was playing hide and seek with my siblings, and decided to hide under my moms bed. While I was waiting for my brother to come find me, I fell asleep. A couple hours later I wake up and it’s dark out. The house is empty. I’m calling out to see if anyone is home, checking all the rooms. I thought maybe everyone decided to tag me “it” since I passed out. After a while of not finding anyone, the phone rings and I pick up. It’s my mom sounding out of breath calling to see if anyone found me and took me back to my house. Turns out I had actually been knocked out for 6 hours. Not being able to find me during hide and seek for 2 hrs, my siblings went to get my mom who also started looking for me. After another hour and no luck, she called our neighbors across the street to see if I went over to play with their kids. Ofc they said no and said they would call some other people in the neighborhood to find out if they'd seen me. A few hours later, the whole neighborhood was out looking for me. Meanwhile I'm at home chilling on the couch watching Teletubbies and eating goldfish (the original babey).

Luhan:

My dad took me and my siblings to the beach almost every summer in elementary school. We would always stay at this Holiday Inn right across the street from the sands. At night, we would go “hunting” for crabs with a flashlight and a fishnet. But on some nights when my dad was too tired to go out, my siblings and I would hang in the kids room at the hotel. We were fooling around and just being kids. Then we found a big case filled with tubes of paint. I was excited to do some finger painting but before I could reach for a tube, my brother stopped me to say he had an idea. He dared us lay down our sheets of paper and paint them by jumping on the tubes. Being the youngest of four, I thought this was a brilliant idea and immediately got to work. Set my paper down and lined up the colors I wanted to use. I jumped.... Only a spec of paint made it onto the paper... The rest beautifully decorated the off-white walls of the kids room. We all just froze because oh my stars we’re gonna be in so much trouble. Turning to each other, we made a very strong pinky promise to not tell a soul what happened. The next day when we returned to the kids room, the case was gone, faded splotches of green and purple remained on the walls, and a big paper taped above reading “NO PAINTING ALLOWED”.

Fun fact: my eldest sister used to write about my adventures for her creative essay homework’s in middle school.