#we gave our time to something undefined

[arcielee]

We gave our time to something undefined

Summary: Aemond receives a late night visitor. Paring: Aemond Targaryen x Rhaena Targaryen Word Count: 2.7k+ Warnings: Kissing, oral (f receiving), fingering, loss of virginity, and Aemond is still the consent king 👑. Author's Note: This is part 2 of Quietly, it slips through your fingers though I may do a third, as they have me hostage Gif edit by the wonderful @myfandomprompts. A big thank you to my beloved @aemondsbabe for being my beta reader and helping me hone my craft. Also ñuhon is Valyrian for mine, and sȳz riña is good girl, but I trust you all already know that one. 😈

Aemond was poised in front of the fireplace, dressed in cotton sleeping trousers and a tunic that was unbuttoned to his navel; his silver hair was slung over his shoulder in a low braid. A golden hue spilled from the hearth and washed over his practiced stoicism, his one eye trained to the flames that were crackling and curling around the blackened logs.   

His arm was stretched on the rest, his fingers drumming a slow rhythm to battle how his heart was still rattling against his ribs; his other was bent, fingers pressed into his prominent chin. He swore he could still smell the remnants of the heaven he had touched earlier, something that was both sweet and intoxicating, something that now consumed him wholly. 

He thought back to earlier that night, to after he had torn away from the small hall, his heated steps leading him throughout the corridors in a desperate search for an exit that would bring him outside of King’s Landing. He knew that Vhagar would be awaiting him, the she-dragon keenly aware of her rider’s agitation. Aemond longed to climb aback of her, to tear over the night sky, as if his ire could only be sated by dragonback. 

Or so he initially thought. 

He could not say what had stopped him—perhaps the low rumble of his nuncle. It pulled him to watch from the shadows as Daemon and his daughter, Baela, took their turns to growl at one another about the night’s events.

Rhaena was also present, also watching. 

She was a woman now, with the same quiet confidence Aemond recalled as he watched her observe her father and her sister. He noted that she did not meet with their bravado on display, but instead remained watchful; her head tilted slightly with a flicker of amusement across her lovely features. 

It reminded Aemond of Driftmark, all those years ago when everyone gathered to grieve, to pay their respects for Lady Laena. He was only a boy but still aware of the  heavy sadness in her eyes that absorbed everything around her. He recalled when her gaze fell to him, how it rooted him to the stone. Rhaena watched at his failed attempt to try and speak from his heart; she did not scowl, but merely held a clear curiosity for whatever he had to say. 

Instead, his tongue thickened and he  walked away, the grief unsaid. 

How quickly her expression changed later that night, how her lovely eyes burned with betrayal when he sauntered back, covered in ash, dragonless no more—

“—I know Dark Sister sings for blood,” and the taunting words brought Aemond back to see Baela  squaring off towards Daemon. At that same moment, Rhaena noticed him, as if she was drawn to how his blood now burned in his veins. 

Aemond stalked away, quickly and quietly, his ire rekindled. He thought of the patronizing expression that had shown in the lines of Daemon’s face. Arrogance will weigh the dragon down, his sister often sang; Aemond only scoffed at the thought.  

You have lived too long, nuncle.

He heard the footfalls echoing behind, though he did not think they would follow him out to the terrace. Aemond planted his palms to the cool stone of the balustrade, greeted by the sea breeze and the distant rumble of Vhagar. He then felt her presence, that same curiosity from long ago. 

You are lost, princess.

Aemond wished to frighten her, but she did not balk, but remained stance, facing him just as Baela had Daemon. Her gaze was unwavering, analyzing, almost desperate to see what was underneath. His fingers itched to show her, removing the eyepatch but even then she responded in a way that he never thought possible. 

There was no pity to be found, just a genuine remorse that left him shattered—the softness and the warmth of her lips against his marred side, his skin prickling from her touch. 

Back in his room, Aemond could feel the warmth emitting from the embers in front of him, or perhaps it was from the memory of what had followed that kiss, of how she fit against his chest, of how she looked up at him unabashed, unafraid, unwilling to leave him. 

His fingers flexed, balling back into a fist, still feeling the ghost pulse of her erratic heartbeat from the pleasure he had pulled from her… 

His blood simmered, but a soft tap on his door brought his mind back into his room. Aemond moved, a flash of silver to welcome the distraction. When he opened the door, Rhaena slipped in; she was quick to pull it closed behind her, her back pressing against the oak, breathless. 

His every nerve was alight as he drank in the sight of her–her deep breaths, the rise and fall of her chest, her lithe curves pressing the pastel silk of her nightdress and her skin peering through the matching silk robe hastily pulled over. Her silver locs had been knotted back into a long braid, accompanied with a pleasant scent of rose water. 

Her eyes held the same look from earlier, wide and glassy, uncertain but also unwilling to leave. 

Aemond swallowed. 

You came, he wished to say, but his arrogance won his tongue. “So soon, princess?” 

I had to see you, she did not reply, but instead her face shifted into a coy facade. “You told me to come find you if I wished to find satisfaction…” 

Her words ignited something within him and Aemond closed the space between them. His one palm grabbed her hip and the other moved to touch her jaw, gently tilting her head to claim her lips just as he had out on the terrace. Her trepidation from before was gone, now replaced with a warm familiarity as her tongue curled in rhythm with his own. 

Aemond hummed his pleasure and Rhaena pulled him closer until he melded against her, the surge of fire meeting fire with a burning desperation. She gasped softly and he deepened the kiss, drawing the air from her aching lungs. His leg shifted between her thighs with a pressure that made her mewl, softly, sweetly. It trilled the length of his spine, his cock throbbing against the seams of his slacks. 

He pulled back and reached for her hand, her fingers lacing as though they belonged in his grasp. She followed quietly as he pulled her towards the bed, a giggle spilling, gleeful. Then Aemond paused and turned to face her again; his large hands moved to cradle her jaw, holding her gaze, and her skin rippled with gooseflesh from the contrast of his gentle touch and the roughness of his palms. 

“This will only go as far as you wish it too,” his voice was low, his words tinged with a fear that she would simply change her mind and leave. 

But instead hope bloomed with the flutter of her lashes, her lips curling into a smile as she stepped closer to capture his lips. Her hands knotted into the loose fabric of his tunic and she pulled him closer still, smiling. Aemond thrummed from the taste of passion, tilting her head to savor the kiss. 

The silk she had been wearing was now a puddle at her feet, and Aemond discarded his tunic, his hands pausing at the waistband of his pants. He looked at Rhaena, watching her carefully, the black now swallowing the blues and the purples of his one intensive eye, an amber gleam flickering in the sapphire of his other. 

Her smile remained as she took a step back, resting on the edge of the bed. She did not look away from him as his eye trailed over her soft curves, admiring the golden glow of the fire on her brown skin, how it rose with the night air, her nipples pebbling in response. 

Beautiful, he does not say but instead swallowed to wet his throat. “That bastard does not deserve you,” his rasped confession wrenched from his lungs. 

Only then did she look at her hands resting on her plush thighs, and offered a soft hum in return. The boldness that had brought her to his room continued her motion, her hands reaching to grab the waistband of his slacks, her fingers precariously placed above the heady bulge that pressed against the crotch. 

He felt his blood roaring to stain his cheeks as her eyes washed over his bare body, trailing the silver scars now displayed, the lines that cut into his trim waist before she met with his gaze again. Aemond allowed himself a step closer, a heavy sway, moving between her parted thighs until he was close enough for her to softly touch his unmarred side, until he could feel her breathless whisper hot against his skin– 

“Then claim me.”  

And he burned with how each syllable dripped with the honey that spilled from her kiss-swollen lips. “Aōhon ynot sahās,” she said, her eyes locking onto him. 

Make me yours.

His hand covered her own, turning his head until his lips feathered the pulse of her wrist. “Ñuhon,” he growled against her skin, mine, and then he pushed forward until she melted into the mattress, lifting her legs and welcoming him into the cradle of her hips. 

His mouth was hot, ravenous, only allowing her a moment to breathe when he moved his attention to the curve of her jaw and to her neck. His teeth nipped at her skin, leaving dark plumes of color in his wake. 

He could feel her trembling beneath him, her head falling back with a gasp. “Aemond!” 

It was his siren song, those sweet sounds from the terrace. They remained with his steps that brought him back to his room, echoing in his mind until it curdled the marrow of his bones, a dull ache that knotted his lower organs. He wished to draw those same sounds but with his tongue; his hands pressed to open her thighs further, and he sank between them to place an intimate kiss that made her shudder in response. 

She was slick, a taste divine, and his tongue trailed between her folds until he felt her hands knotting in his hair. He feasted between her thighs with a hold that dimpled the softness of her skin, anchoring himself to her core. Aemond pulled her towards a new plateau of pleasure with his mouth, his tongue laving until she tried to writhe away. 

Her back arched with the expanse of her chest begging for air, her hands moving for fistfuls of bed linen to ground herself. Her lips parted with a wordless cry as his dexterous fingers curled within her. “Aemond,” she panted, panicked, but he touched her with familiarity, feeling how her every fiber sang for him: heart thrumming, muscles tensing, desperate for more. 

Aemond hummed against her cunt and the low vibration caused a soft cry, a pulse of her velvet walls around his fingers. “Sȳz riña,” he murmured, adding another finger that met with the tandem of his first. His tongue returned to carve through her sweet lips with an unrelenting pace that pulled her towards her peak. 

It shuddered throughout her, a sob spilling that Aemond moved to muffle with a kiss, his praises soothing against her lips: “Sȳz riña, sȳz riña.” He melted into her warmth, her body pliant and molded against him. His arms caged her to the bed and his cock twitched, the heat from her bare cunt calling and pulling him closer.

Rhaena squirmed beneath him, and he tried to lift his weight but her nails bit into his waist, stopping him. “Aemond,” she was breathless, almost begging. “Please, I–” but she faltered to find her words. He could feel her pulse still fluttering against his chest, and she swallowed thickly. 

“Aōhon ynot sahās,” she repeated, a desperation now touching her tone.

Aemond felt his heart seize in his chest, and he tilted his head for a gentle kiss. “We will begin slowly,” his voice rasped with his reserve, “I promise.” 

She nodded and he was careful to slot his slender hips between her thighs, his swollen cock heavy and pressing against one side. She sighed, and he looked to see her drunken smile splayed on her lips as he nestled against her. His arm weaved between to guide himself, and she tensed from the unfamiliar pressure, his swollen head sliding through her folds and lining with her entrance. 

A muscle ticked in his jaw with his concentration, his slow thrusts sinking into her warmth with a shuddering halt when his hips met with hers. Aemond then stilled, watchful, worried, seeing how her face was clouded. He moved to kiss her, his body shifting against hers, and she let out a small noise that he swallowed. 

“Rhaena…”

Her eyes fixated on him, and he felt the fire in her veins pressing towards the surface. Her head nodded yes, a whispered, “Kostilus,” please, and only then did his hips begin to move. Her tension began to fall away with his slow rut, his rhythm continuing. She mewled softly, canting her hips to meet the snap of his own, sparking something different, something deeper, and he felt her tighten around him.

Aemond hummed, and his pace quickened with the lewd sound of skin-to-skin. The heat curling in his core began to spread under his skin, a bowstring taut to nearly snap at the sound of her breathless cries, the pulsing of her velvet walls that pulled him after. 

He groaned, his hip stuttering, and his brow pressed to her own. He felt her legs wrapping around his waist and  looked at her. Rhaena combed her fingers through the silver hair that spilled from his braid, pulling him close for a kiss. 

“Stay with me,” his voice was low, blooms of red staining his cheeks. “Kostilus,” he added.

Please.

Rhaena kissed him with the promise to stay and only then did he pull away. He pulled on his slacks again, unbuttoned, and moved towards the wash basin to grab a clean cloth. Aemond turned on his heel and saw her, bashfulness now replacing her boldness from before, wrapped in the sheets. Her eyes were wide, glassy, and filled with something he now understood.

Desire, thrumming with the ichor of Old Valyria that ran rampant in their veins. 

He moved towards her and a smile curled on her lips, her eyes falling to the sway of his hips and the silver patch that peered lewdly above the waist of his trousers. His hand reached to pull the sheet away while his other began to carefully wipe away his pearly spend. 

She sighed, different than before, now with contentment and a consideration as her thighs fell open to welcome him again. He burned under her sense of awe as she watched his hands move over her skin; Aemond murmured his questions and she promised she felt fine, catching his wrist and bringing it to meet her lips for a kiss. 

He pulled away a second time–the last time he swore–discarding the soiled cloth and pulling through his drawers to retrieve a silk scarf that had been gifted from across the narrow sea. He watched her hands move to wrap her hair and he shyly offered to knot it at the nape of her neck, pressing a chaste kiss there when he finished. 

With their earlier tension spent and staining the sheets, their exchange was now natural, a tethered bond that seemed to be planted on that fateful night of Driftmark. Aemond climbed beneath the covers and his hands could not leave her, pulling her until her back was flushed to his chest, fitting like a missing piece. His arm wrapped around her waist, holding her close enough to feel the thrum of his heart. 

Her voice was soft, breaking the quiet that had settled over them. “What will happen now?” 

His hum reverberated through them and he pulled her closer until his lips could touch her shoulder once, twice, following the curve and pressing against the soft spot under her ear, pressing contemplative kisses before he said: “Tomorrow I will petition the king for your hand in marriage.” 

Rhaena shifted in his arms. “What if he says no?” 

He nuzzled into her neck, smiling against her skin. “Vhagar remembers you,” he began, his breath tickling; she bloomed with his words. “If they say no, I will take you to Driftmark and we will have a ceremony anyway, just as our ancestors did.”

“But what–”

“But nothing,” his tone cut through, a gentle resolve, and he pressed another kiss to the nape of her neck. Rhaena relaxed against him. “Iksā ñuhon.”

You are mine.

Taglist (Tumblr kindred spirits): @aaaaaamond @annikin-im-panicin @watercolorskyy @black-dread @fan-goddess @httpsdoll @theromanticegoist @assortedseaglass @amiraisgoingthruit @theoneeyedprince @babyblue711 @itbmojojoejo @girlwith-thepearlearring @lauraneedstochill @theobjectofyourire @troublesomesnitch @hb8301 @snowprincesa1 @namelesslosers @darylandbethfanforever9 @helaelaemond @qyburnsghost @niocel

arcie's hotd masterlist

[wolverigrl]

The first date

Hugh Jackman x reader (actress)

!Disclaimer! I made some small changes in the last parts! The movie they made is a fictional one about Lady Deadpool. Everything takes place in 2015. Y/n is in her late 20s. Blake and Ryan got married long before and I changed the ages of their and Hugh's kids so it would fit more!

Warnings: none, only some swearing here and there and a bit fluff, not proofread!!

Enjoy!

Previous part

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The early morning breeze was cool as I jogged through Central Park, the soft hum of the city waking up in the background. The familiar rhythm of my footsteps against the pavement was oddly comforting, almost like a meditation. I pulled my black baseball cap lower, shielding my eyes from the rising sun, and zipped up my running jacket a bit more. My leggings clung comfortably to my legs, and I felt grounded, my mind clear, my body moving with ease.

Jogging here had become part of my routine, a way to escape for a moment. The quiet mornings felt like a reset. As I slowed my pace and started walking toward the park exit, my breathing still steady, I noticed two people approaching from the side, their faces lighting up in recognition.

"Excuse me... are you y/n?" the guy asked, his voice a little shaky with excitement.

I smiled softly, adjusting my cap. "Yeah, that’s me."

The girl next to him looked at me with wide eyes, already fumbling for her phone. "Oh my God, we are big fans! Can we take a picture with you?"

I chuckled, nodding. "Of course, let’s do it."

We huddled together, her phone snapping a few pictures. The guy, who looked like he was around his early twenties, lingered for a moment longer, hesitating before speaking.

“You probably hear this all the time." he began, "but you really inspired me. I’ve always wanted to act, but I didn’t have the courage to pursue it. Seeing you do what you love gave me the push I needed so I just joined a local theater group."

For a moment, his words hung in the air, and I felt a rush of warmth. It wasn't every day someone said something so meaningful.

"That’s amazing! I’m so glad I could inspire you. Keep at it, okay? It’s tough, but if it’s your passion, it’s always worth it."

He nodded, his face full of excitement and we hugged each other as a goodbye. As they walked away, I called out, “You made my day! Love you guys!” Their faces lit up even more, and I couldn't help but feel grateful for moments like this.

This encounter left me with a good feeling, and as I walked back home, I couldn’t help but feel lighter. Connecting with people like that reminded me why I started this journey in the first place.

Back in my apartment, I kicked off my shoes and collapsed onto the couch. My mind wandered to everything that had happened over the past few days—work, interviews, photoshoots—but one thing stuck out more than the rest: Hugh. I had been thinking about him more than usual, and after yesterday’s intense moment, it was hard not to.

Still, before I let my thoughts drift too far, I got got into the bathroom for a quick refreshing shower. After that I changed into a comfy office look, grabbed my phone and dialed my parents. I hadn’t caught up with them in a while, and I missed hearing their voices.

“Y/n! Pumpkin! How’s our superstar?” my mom’s voice greeted me on the other end.

I smiled, sinking into the cushions. "Super busy, as usual. But everything’s going well. I'll have a meeting with the team today. lots of interviews coming up."

We chatted for a while about my schedule, how they were doing, and the usual family updates. I purposely avoided mentioning anything about Hugh. It wasn’t that I didn’t want to tell them, but I wasn’t ready for that conversation yet. Not when things between us were still so undefined.

After saying goodbye, I got up to get ready for my meeting at the office. As I was applying a bit of makeup, my phone buzzed on the counter. Hugh’s name appeared on the screen.

HUGH: Good morning, beautiful❤️ How's your day starting?

I couldn’t help but smile as I typed back, already feeling my heart speed up a little.

Y/N: Good morning handsome🥰 Doing pretty good so far. Just came back from my morning run. How about yours?

Almost immediately, his reply came through.

HUGH: I still don’t know how you can enjoy running😅 Mine's good too. Picked coffee with a friend and now we're at his house already working.

Y/N: Maybe you're just getting old?👀

HUGH: Why so mean? Did you trip on your run?

I snapped a quick selfie in the mirror with my tongue out and send it to him.

Y/N: I'm not mean. It was a legitimate question. I'm heading to the office now! Wish me luck!😘

HUGH: Looking great as always! And good luck, though you don’t need it. You always kill it sweetheart😘

A moment later, another message appeared, this time with a photo of Hugh, standing in what looked like an unfinished house. He was wearing a tight-fitting shirt, his arms slightly dusted with sawdust, his hair messy in a way that only made him look better. I paused, biting my lip. He looked really good. And my mind, much to my frustration, flashed back to that kiss.

Y/N: Somebody pls call the fire department🔥

HUGH: Lady, stop exaggerating😂

I chuckled, shaking my head. There was something so annoyingly attractive about how casual he was, even when he looked like that. After a few more texts, I realized I had to leave or I’d be late.

The management office was buzzing with energy when I arrived, as usual. I greeted everyone warmly, settling into the meeting room where we began discussing upcoming interviews and events. Everything was going smoothly, just the usual PR talk—until one of the managers, Sam, leaned forward with a more serious expression.

“So, we’ve been thinking,” he began. “The buzz around you and Hugh has been great for both of your images. The movie’s coming out soon, and the fan speculation has been... let’s just say, active”

I nodded slowly, already sensing where this was going.

“We think it would be smart to keep that momentum going." Sam continued. “Even after the release of the movie, we want you two to keep up the appearance of having something going on. Publicly, deny it in interviews, of course. But tease the people a bit more. Keep them guessing.”

I blinked, processing what he was saying. "So, you want us to pretend we’re together, but not really confirm anything?"

Sam nodded. "Exactly. It’ll keep the public engaged, and your fanbases will stay hooked. It’s good for both of you."

The idea sat heavy in my chest. I could see why they wanted it—it made sense from a PR standpoint—but the thought of turning something personal into a game made me uneasy. What if it messed things up between Hugh and me? What if it turned whatever we were trying to figure out into a spectacle?

“I’ll talk to Hugh about it." I said carefully. “And I think it’s best if you reach out to his team as well, just to make sure we’re all on the same page.”

Sam smiled, satisfied. "Good call. Let us know what you both decide."

They nodded, and we moved on to other topics. I was particularly excited when they mentioned a potential collaboration with a fashion brand. Modeling for a brand had always been a dream, and eagerly agreed.

After sorting out some paperwork, I left the office, my mind still swirling with everything we discussed. As I stepped outside, my phone rang. It was Chris.

"Hey!" he greeted me. "I'm in New York earlier than planned. Are you free?"

Of course, I agreed, and we arranged to meet up at his hotel. Soon, we were stroling through the city together, talking about everything from movies to work. Even though my phone buzzed several times, I ignored it, wanting to be fully present with Chris.

After a while, Chris turned to me with a grin. "So, about those rumors with you and Hugh... anything you want to share?" I felt my stomach twist. Lying to I Chris didn't sit right with me, but Hugh and I had agreed that only Ryan and Blake knew about us. So, I gave him the standard answer.

"We’re just friends,” I said, not quite meeting his eyes. “You know how the rumors go. Our Managers want us to play along because it looks good. That’s all.”

Chris raised an eyebrow, clearly not convinced but letting it slide. “If you say so.”

Then, with a sudden shift in tone, he said, “Actually... I’ve been meaning to tell you. I met someone.”

I blinked, surprised. "What? When?"

“Not too long ago. Her name’s Alba. She’s incredible—smart, sweet, talented and down-to-earth. We’ve been spending a lot of time together lately.”

As Chris spoke, his eyes lit up, and I could tell he was smitten. I felt a surge of happiness for him, pulling him into a tight hug. “Chris, that’s amazing! I’m so happy for you.”

He smiled, clearly touched by my excitement, and we spent the rest of the afternoon wandering around the city, talking about Alba, his family and how things were going. Eventually, I had the idea to skip the pub and order takeout instead. Chris agreed, but only on one condition.

"We have to watch a Disney movie!" He said with eyes sparkling with mischief.

"Deal!" I laughed.

After heading back to my place, we posted a photo of us together on Instagram, and as expected, the comments looded in.

>>ginainabottle: Where's Hugh?😭<<

>>markix69: Y/n always with the dilfs. QUEEN💯<<

>>teddy1xoxo: How is it living my dream?❤️😭<<

I finally checked my messages and saw a few from Hugh.

HUGH: Have fun tonight😘

HUGH: Meeting up already?

HUGH: Everything okay?

Guilt twisted in my stomach and I quickly called him.

"Hey.." I said softly when he picked up. "I'm so sorry I didn't respond earlier. I was just... you know how it is... We've been talking non-stop."

"Y/n it's fine." Hugh replied, but there was something off in his tone. "What've you two been up to?"

I told him everything--how we spend the day walking around, catching up and now were getting ready for a movie night.

"Chris is still here, actually." I added. "We're about to watch The Little Mermaid."

There was a pause before Hugh spoke again, and I could swear there was a hint of something... maybe jealousy? But I brushed it off.

"I miss you." he said, his voice softer now.

"I miss you too." I replied, smiling at he thought of seeing him soon.

"Oh, by the way." I added remembering the management's idea. "My team suggested we tease the fans a bit more online. Even after the movie releases."

Hugh chuckled. "Yeah, we can play around with it. Deny everything but drop a few hints. But what do you think?"

I bit my lip, thinking back to the conversation with my team. "I'm not sure, honestly. I don't want the media or public pressure to affect what we're building between us, you know? But if you're okay with it, maybe we should continue."

Hugh chuckled, the tension easing from his voice. "Like a soft launch, huh? So, we hint at things but never really confirm it?"

"Exactly." I said, smiling at the idea now that it was being said out loud. "We can have fun with it. But still deny things if people ask outright."

"Deal," he said, his tone light again. "Let's tease them a little, but keep the mystery alive."

We both laughed at the absurdity of it, and the playful tone of the conversation helped ease my earlier guilt. Then, Hugh's voice turned a bit more serious, though stillwarm. "By the way... how about gym and breakfast tomorrow? Just the two of us?"

I hesitated, not out of uncertainty but because of how much I wanted it. "Like... our first real date?" I asked, grinning into the phone.

"Yep. Our first official date." he confirmed, the excitement in his voice clear.

"Then, it's a yes!" I said, feeling butterflies stir in my stomach at the hought. "Where should we meet?

We hashed out the details and after a few more minutes of casual banter, we finally said our goodbyes, both of us feeling lighter.

As soon as I hung up, I turned to find Chris giving me a curious look from the couch. "So. first date, huh?" he teased, raising an eyebrow.

I sighed, knowing I couldn't hide it anymore. "Yeah, fine. You got me," I admitted, plopping down beside him. "Hugh and I... there's something going on. But we're keeping it quiet for now. Chris grinned, clearly happy for me. "I had a feeling. And honestly? I'm happy for you. Hugh's a good guy He was always super nice when I had the chance talking to him."

"Thanks, Chris. It's just complicated, you know? With the media and all."

"Yeah, I get it." He said with a knowing nod. "But if anyone can handle it, it's you." He then smirked, his teasing side coming back. "So are you guys gonna do a soft launch like the rest of us normal people, or something more dramatic?"

I squealed and shoving his arm. "What the heck?! He mentioned a soft launch too! What are you? Telepathic?!" And we both bursted into laughter.

We calmed down and shifted our focus back to The Little Mermaid. Chris singing along to Part of Your World with exaggerated enthusiasm. It wasn't long before he dozed off, his head lolling back against the couch. I smiled fondly at him, his mouth slightly open, snoring softly. The day had been a whirlwind of emotions, but it was nice to end it with someone I trusted so much.

Grabbing my phone,I snapped a quick picture of Chris, chuckling to myself as I did and quickly posted the photo to Instagram with the caption:

>>y/n instagram: Disney and chill with my favorite co-star🧜🏻‍♂️<<

The comments poured in almost instantly, but I ignored the notifications, setting my phone on the coffee table and grabbing a blanket to drape over Chris. After making sure he was comfortable, I turned off the lights, heading to my bedroom. I slipped under the covers, the events of the day replaying in my mind. Hugh, Chris, the PR idea and the upcoming date.

The next morning, I woke up to the sound of Chris moving around the apartment. I got up and changed into comfy clothes as I walked into the living room where he was packing up his things, looking like the human version of a Disney prince as usual. As I stretched and rubbed my eyes, he glanced over at me with a soft smile.

“Morning, sleepyhead." he teased, zipping up his jacket. “I’ve got a meeting downtown, but I didn’t want to leave without saying goodbye.”

I sat up and gave him a playful wave. “Didn’t want me to think you snuck out, huh?”

“Exactly. I’m not that kind of guy,” he joked, slinging his bag over his shoulder. Then his tone softened. “Hey, keep me updated on the Hugh situation, okay? I’m curious how things go. And don’t forget to tell me about that first date.”

I smiled, the warmth of his support making me feel even more confident. “I will. Thanks, Chris.”

He leaned down and gave me a quick hug and a peck on the cheek. “See you soon, y/n. And don’t forget, I’m always just a text away if you need me.”

“Will do. Good luck with your meeting!”

With a final wave, he headed out the door, leaving me alone with my thoughts—and a mess of nerves about my first official date with Hugh later that morning. I had no idea what to expect, but I hoped it wouldn’t turn into a disaster.

After Chris left, I freshened up, threw on my workout clothes, and made my way to the gym where Hugh and I had agreed to meet. This wasn’t just a casual workout—it was our first date, so I kinda did a big deal out of it.

When I arrived, Hugh was already there, looking ridiculously good in his gym gear. He waved me over with that easygoing smile that never failed to make my heart race.

“You ready?” he asked smiling down at me.

“I was born ready!" With this Hugh opened the door and let me go in first.

We started with some light cardio to warm up, and things were going smoothly—until we hit the weight section again. I’d watched Hugh easily lift a set of dumbbells like they were made of air, and, in a moment of misplaced confidence, I thought 'Why not?'. I grabbed a barbell and decided to push myself a bit further than usual. The first few reps went okay, but as I tried to push the barbell up again, my arms started to shake. I tried to power through it, but I quickly realized I had overestimated my strength. Just as the weight became too much, Hugh was beside me in an instant. “Need some help there?” he asked, amusement dancing in his eyes. I tried to save face. “I’ve got it, just—just give me a second…” Before I could protest further, he gently but firmly took hold of the barbell, lifting it with ease and placing it back on the rack.

"Yeah, you totally had that under control." he teased, his smile widening. “Okay, maybe I overdid it a little." I admitted, feeling the heat rising in my cheeks.

"No shame in asking for help." he said, giving me a playful nudge. “Just don’t hurt yourself trying to keep up with me.”

I playfully groaned and lightly slapped his chest. He just laughed, pulling me tighter against him, his arms wrapping around my waist. I looked up at him, grinning, my gaze lingering on his lips for a beat too long.

“Do you need a kiss to forget that little mishap?” he teased, moving his face closer, eyes sparkling with mischief.

I smirked, voice dropping to a whisper, “Oh, I’ll need more than one to forget that.”

Before he could respond, I closed the gap between us, pulling him in with my arms wrapped around his neck. My fingers tangled in his messy, sweat-damp hair as our kiss deepened, the heat between us rising instantly. He brushed his tongue over my bottom lip, and I parted my lips, welcoming him further. His hands gripped me firmly at the waist, keeping me pressed tightly against him, while my hands couldn’t stay still, roaming over his broad shoulders and chest. Every nerve in my body felt like it was on fire, completely overtaken by the moment, the world around us fading away.

I didn’t even realize when my hands slipped under his shirt, fingertips grazing his warm skin. But just as quickly as the moment ignited, Hugh pulled back, breathless, his forehead resting against mine.

“We’re only on our first date,” he murmured, his voice thick with amusement, a crooked smile playing on his lips. “I haven’t even given you flowers yet.”

I chuckled softly, my head still spinning, and nodded. “You’re right. We said we wouldn’t rush things… and, well, making out in a public gym might be pushing it. I don’t think our management would be too thrilled if the media caught wind of this.”

Hugh laughed, loosening his hold on me, though his hands lingered for a moment longer. “Yeah, I can already hear the headlines.”

Reluctantly, we stepped back from each other, both grinning, but still feeling that magnetic pull between us.

After that little incident, we wrapped up the workout, and I offered to cook us breakfast back at my place. It was the least I could do after Hugh saved me from total humiliation. But as soon as I started cooking, I realized maybe that wasn't the best idea.

The eggs burned almost immediately, the toast was so hard you could break a tooth on it, and I somehow managed to get pancake batter all over the counter.

Hugh stood nearby, watching the chaos unfold with a mix of amusement and concern.

"I swear, I'm usually better at this." I said, desperately trying to salvage something from the mess. Hugh laughed, leaning against the counter. "Better at lifting weights or cooking?"

"Oh shut up!" I laughed and tossed a burnt piece of toast at him, which he dodged easily.

"You sure you don't want me to handle this?" he asked, his voice filled with amusement.

"Hugh, I already said no. I'm perfectly capable." I said defensively, though the evidence clearly suggested otherwise.

"You keep telling yourself that." he teased.

I flipped another pancake, only to see it land halfway off the pan.

I let out a dramatic sigh, slumping my shoulders in mock defeat. Hugh chuckled and wrapped his arms around me from behind, pressing a quick kiss to my neck. The warmth of his lips and the slight scratch of his beard sent a shiver down my spine, goosebumps rising instantly. I turned my head towards him, and with a soft smile, he said, "Looks like the universe is giving you a day off from cooking. Let’s clean up and eat at the café instead."

Eventually, we gave up on my culinary attempt and decided to head downtown to the next café. We settled into a cozy corner table, ordering some coffee and toast. As the food arrived, I couldn't help but laugh.

"At least this can't go wrong, right?" joked, gesturing to the perfectly normal-looking plate in front of us. Hugh raised an eyebrow. "I wouldn't be so sure. With us, anything's possible."

I pretended to look horrified. "Don't jinx it!"

He chuckled, taking a sip of his coffee. "So, What do you think of our first date so far?"

I paused, meeting his eyes.

Hugh leaned back smiling. "Well I've gotta say, it's been pretty great so far."

I chuckled, feeling the warmth spread through me. "I agree. Disaster-prone, but definitely memorable."

We spent the rest of breakfast chatting, laughing about the little mishaps from the past couple of hours, and just enjoying each other's company. It, again, felt easy and natural, even with the nerves of a first date hanging in the air.

As we finished up, Hugh reached under the table for my hand and squeezed it gently, giving me a soft look that made my heart skip a beat. "You know, I'm really glad we do this."

"Me too, Hugh." Iadmitted, feeling the same.

Later that afternoon, Hugh and I met up with Ryan for an interview promoting the movie, which finally releases tomorrow. It was just the three of us sitting in a comfortable setup, no live audience, just cameras, and a quiet room. I always looked forward to interviews with Ryan—he had a way of making everything fun and unpredictable.

The interviewer greeted us friendly with a firm handshake and began with the usual questions about the film after introducing us to the already recording camera.

"So, y/n, how did it feel stepping into the shoes of Lady Deadpool?”

I smiled, leaning forward slightly. “Honestly, it was a dream. She’s such a chaotic, yet deeply emotional character. Playing her meant getting to do some wild action scenes while also diving into her personal struggles. Plus, I got to wear a lot of leather.”

Ryan jumped in, grinning. “And kick some serious butt. Let’s not forget that.”

The interviewer nodded and turned to Hugh. “And how about you, Hugh? Wolverine is such an iconic character. How was it returning to the role?”

Hugh smiled, looking relaxed. “It’s always an honor to play Wolverine. This time around, the dynamic with Deadpool—and Lady Deadpool—added a whole new level of fun. The banter, the action sequences, it all just felt... electric.”

Ryan leaned in dramatically. “But let’s be honest. It was terrible. We all hated each other on set!"

Hugh, the interviewer and I bursted into laughter as Ryan continued, completely straight-faced. "No, seriously, it was a nightmare. Every day was a battle I'm surprised we even finished the movie."

"I mean, you were pretty hard to work with.: I teased, leaning into the joke.

Ryan shrugged dramatically. "I do my best to bring chaos wherever I go."

The interviewer then introduced a fun segment: Fan questions pulled from Twitter. “Alright, we’ve got some tweets here from fans. Let’s see what they want to know.”

He read the first tweet aloud. “@MarvelFanGirl asks: ‘What was the funniest moment on set?’ "

Ryan immediately jumped in. “Oh, I’ve got this. There was actually a pretty intense kiss scene between y/n and Hugh in the original cut of the film, but - spoiler alert - it got cut because the film was running too long. Marvel classics." Hugh chuckled, already shaking his head in amusement.

"And I swear by the mother of my children, Blake Ellender Lively!" he dramatically paused. "They just kept going after the director's cut! The crew didn't know if they were still in the scene or... well, if it was method acting, if you know what I mean."

At this point the interviewer started laughing uncontrollably and held his hand in front of his mouth.

I laughed, hiding my face in my hands. “Why do you always bring that up?”

“Because it’s comedy gold!” Ryan laughed, clearly enjoying himself.

"Don't listen to him, Hugh said, grinning. "He's just upset he didn't get a kiss scene."

"Eeeexactly!" Ryan exclaimed, pointing at Hugh. "Where's Deadpool's kiss scene, huh? It's an outrage!"

Even the crew behind the cameras started laughing and the interviewer moved on with the questions, still giggling.

"Ryan, if you could switch roles with anyone in the cast, who would it be?" asked the interviewer.

Without missing a beat, Ryan replied.

"Y/n, hands down. She got the sexiest costume, the coolest weapons, and she gets to kick more butt than anyone else. Plus, let's not forget--she gets to kiss Hugh."

I groaned, shaking my head while Hugh laughed. "You're never going to let that go, are you?"

"Never!" Ryan said with a grin.

The next tweet came in, and the interviewer read it out. “@WolverineLover asks: ‘If Wolverine and Lady Deadpool had their own spin-off movie, what would it be about?’”

Hugh pretended to think seriously. “I imagine it would be about trying to stop Lady Deadpool from blowing up everything in sight.”

I shot him a mock-offended look. “Hey, Lady Deadpool isn’t that destructive.”

Ryan snorted. “Oh please, she’d turn the whole thing into a circus. Wolverine would just be there for damage control.”

We all laughed as we moved on to the next question. “@DeadpoolRocks asks: ‘Ryan, how much of Deadpool is actually you?’ "

Ryan grinned, leaning back in his chair. “Oh, about 90%, I’d say. The other 10% is just me trying to look cooler than I actually am.”

As the interview wrapped up, we exchanged a few more lighthearted jabs, and I couldn’t help but feel how much fun we had together. Ryan and Hugh had a way of making every moment a little less serious and a lot more entertaining.

“Alright." Ryan said, standing up as the cameras shut off. “Who’s ready for round two tomorrow?”

I moaned, already dreading whatever he had in store. “I’m not sure my dignity can handle it.”

Hugh laughed, wrapping an arm around my shoulders as we walked out. “Don’t worry, I’ll be there to save you. Again.”

“Let’s just hope there are no weights involved this time,” I quipped.

After the interview, we walked off stage, and Ryan clapped Hugh on the back.

"Man, I'm still disappointed they cut the kiss scene. We were all waiting for the slow-motion sparks."

Hugh just laughed, shaking his head. "Yeah, I'm sure that's why the audience would come to watch the movie. For that."

Ryan wagged his finger. "Don't underestimate the power of romance, Jackman. Fans live for that!"

I shot both of them a look, trying to keep a straight face. "As long as no one mentions the breakfast disaster, I'll consider this interview a win."

Ryan blinked, clearly intrigued. "What breakfast disaster?"

Hugh grinned mischievously, but before he could spill, I put my hand over his mouth in protest. "Nope! Not happening. What happens in the kitchen stays in the kitchen."

Ryan raised his eyebrows, clearly enjoying my embarrassment. "Im going to get that story out of one of you. Just wait!"

"Ha! You wish!" I called over my shoulder, heading out of the studio with them.

Eventually, we split off, with Ryan going in one direction, and Hugh and I in another, after we said our goodbyes.

Hugh opened the passenger door for me so that I could get in. After my little "Thank you", he closed the door with a smile and sat down on the other side. "My place or yours?"

I kissed his cheek. "Let's go to your place."

With that, Hugh drove off, placing his hand on my thigh as he drove.

Smiling, I looked out of the window and stroked the back of his hand with my thumb. What a day.

---------------------------------------------------

@spectorrrhgf @tinawantstobeadoll @appetencyfortacos @weskerussy @kellyxo1 @larkkyoris @shukirschtein14 @corvusmorte @carefree-flowerchild

Next part

Sorry if it's not proofread! Struggled with a migraine today but still wanted to finish this part. But I tried my best! And I hope I didn't confuse anybody with the small changes.

[annecoulmanross]

So it's been a while. But I couldn't let James Fitzjames Finding Day pass without some celebration—thank you Doug Stenton, Stephen Fratpietro, and Robert W. Park for giving us this wonderful and terrible knowledge. I've made an emotional playlist of all of us currently experiencing whatever emotion this is:

Selected lyrics for each song included below the cut!

Strange Ships | PHILDEL

Strange ships won’t let me sail out Passed by the ice and stone now

2. I, Carrion (Icarian) | Hozier

If the wind turns, if I hit a squall Allow the ground to find its brutal way to me

3. Howling | Wild Rivers

Howling out here for the morning light I can’t sing no more

4. The Yawning Grave | Lord Huron

I tried to warn you when you were a child I told you not to get lost in the wild I sent omens and all kinds of signs I taught you melodies, poems, and rhymes

5. Sax Rohmer #1 | The Mountain Goats

Ships loose from their grins, capsize and then they’re gone Sailors with no captains watch a while and then move on

6. Long Wave | Dessa

Starve the guard dog And see what hunger does It’s easy when we’re well fed To talk of love

7. Achilles Come Down | Gang of Youths

Throw yourself into the unknown, With pace and a fury defiant Clothe yourself in beauty untold, And see life as a means to a triumph

8. Eat You Alive | The Oh Hellos

I’ve seen the true face of the things you call life The song of the siren that holds your desire Death, she is cunning and clever as hell And she’ll eat you alive

9. My Ego Dies At The End | Jensen McRae

Leave my body and my ego early Kill it kind with a surgeon’s mercy Claim I put it out of its misery

10. Who We Are | Hozier

Darling, we sacrificed We gave our time to something undefined This phantom life sharpens like an image But it sharpens like a knife

11. Devourer | Aidoneus

Beams of light, show me how to feel Light the gloam, find my Achilles heel I will welcome my mortality—let me go

12. Sound the Bells | Dessa

Go lift your sails up For one last swell Go lift yourselves up To sound the bells

13. Your Bones | Of Monsters and Men

Said goodbye to you my friend As the fire spread All that’s left are your bones That will soon sink like stones

14. Wildflower and Barley | Hozier, Allison Russell

This year, I swear it will be buried in actions This year, I swear it will be buried in words Some close to the surface, some close to the casket I feel as useful as dirt, put my body to work

15. These Bones | Azrai, Momo O’brien

It’s a savage sea we’re made to roam Every tide can turn to haunt us But the ocean reaches past these ghosts And I will always sail for more

16. By Way Of Sorrow | Cry Cry Cry

You have come by way of sorrow You have come by way of tears You’ll reach your destiny Meant to find you all these years

17. Gracestone | PHILDEL

When I open my final door I’m gonna sail much wilder seas than your ships were built for I’m turning into dust across that cove You know, I have known enough to not feel owed

18. Glowing | The Oh Hellos

You’ll rise, like land, pulled up at the sound of some strange commandment A moon alight, reflecting fully And I guess it would feel like rebirth, out of some kind of dying To see yourself so glowing

[djarin]

@usergif new year, new fonts: day 1 – layer styles

You and I burned out our steam Chasing someone else's dream Darling, we sacrificed We gave our time to something undefined

[lalalabelle]

"Everything i ever did, i did for you.."

Pairing: Gojo Satoru x Reader

Warnings: just a lot of angst and some swearing

Summary: Yelling at Megumi about his stubbornness that reminds him of you.

Masterlist----check out the other stuff

"Why can't you just trust me?" Gojo chuckled to hide his frustration from Megumi while training at 2 o'clock in the afternoon. He didn't like having this conversation over and over again every time he went to train him and his other students.

"You can't just put someone in danger especially if it's your student!" Megumi was baffled at how unfazed his mentor was at the thought of another student risking his life to save his friend, to save him.

In truth, Gojo didn't like the thought of someone risking their life too but some things must be done in order to protect his loved ones and the son that he's adopted. He saw how willing Yuji was to fight for his friends and he just needed a little more increase in strength and power, that's why they have been training nonstop for the past few days and Megumi did not like that.

"Why can't we just be a team? Why can't i help him? We are supposed to stick together, doesn't that mean-" Gojo was pissed off now, he doesn't know how many times Megumi has argued with him about this and usually he would be calm about and try to reason with him but today wasn't a good day.

"In a real battle, you would not be there to protect him." Gojo glanced at Yuji and then back at Megumi. He did not understand why his student felt the need to question what he was doing when he has explained countless times that this was for the better.

"WHY NOT?!" Megumi was in disbelief when his teacher could only resonate that he would be out of the fight and that his friend was just going to fight for him. Gojo was shocked at his student's change in tone as he looked at him disapprovingly. "I WILL FIGHT. I'LL BE THERE-"

"Megumi..you don't know that." There was a lot of things he wanted to say, how his mind wasn't thinking clearly, how unpredictable the future is, how undefined the battles and wars are going to be, how even he doesn't know if everyone is going to live another day.

"YES. I. DO." Megumi was being stubborn, willing to do whatever it takes to convince his mentor that this wasn't what was best for him or what he wants. "If Yuji is going to fight, then we're going to fight together. All three of us"

Gojo looked away and closed his eyes, composing himself before saying something he might regret later. "You shouldn't even be near a fight! You are too important." He tried reasoning but he knew that it was hopeless, it was really hard to be on the sidelines and watching others fight for you when you are fully capable of doing it yourself.

"IM NOT!" Megumi yelled

"YES. YES YOU ARE" Gojo is getting impatient

"NO!" Snap!

Something broke inside Gojo as he felt tears on his eyes, threatening to fall.

He grabbed his blindfold and harsly ripped it out of his eyes and his tears were fully visible, looking at Megumi with desperation and sadness. "FUCK! WHY CAN'T YOU JUST LET ME DO THIS FOR YOU (Y/N)!" He yelled at Megumi then his eyes widened, he can't believe what he just said. He dropped his blindfold to the floor and walked away. "Enough about this. I'm done talking about it."

Megumi felt bad about the whole thing and went to comfort him under the large tree in their training grounds. "Gojo-sensei.."

"I'm sorry, i shouldn't have yelled at you today. It's just you look so much like her and it's funny 'cause you're not even related" He laughed bitterly and wiped his eyes looking at sky.

"She actually gave me something, it's like a hologram of our shared times together.." Megumi saw Gojo click something and then a hologram of you showed up infront of them, standing and smiling. Gojo kneeled to you like you were the most precious thing on this planet.

"Satoru.." The hologram of you spoke, frowning as you said his name. "Yes, love?" He replied back, eagerly looking at you like he had lost you for years.

"I want to be a sorcerer and protect people on this planet...you don't have to do this with me.." The hologram continued and looked at him sadly. "But i want to!" "I know you do.."

The hologram knelt down to his level and placed a hand on top of his. "Please understand..there's a possibility that we could die but even if we don't, we can never go back to our old lives again..."

Gojo shook his head as if saying that he does not care about those things if he can get to be with you. "Why would i want to go back to my old life, if you're here?" He tilts his head to the side and gives the hologram a grin that slowly turns into a sad smile.

You chuckled at his cute antics and cupped his cheek, looking at him fondly. "My satoru.."

"You're perfect..I-" When he went to touch your hand that was cupping his cheek, the hologram suddenly malfunctioned. Gojo looked down and sighed.

He sat back against the tree, looked at Megumi thrn back at the distance. "Everything i did, i did for her, and now she is in shoko's office passed out because i accidentally hurt her"

Megumi stayed silent and just listened to everything his teacher was saying.

"I guess since you were so much like her that i wanted someone to protect you too.."

[selineabanto]

we gave our time to something undefined

[thought--bubble]

Aemond Fic Recs

This one will be kind of long but all of these stories are really good!

Back to my Masterlist

Aemond fic recs

Page 1,

☣ @arcielee☣

We Gave our Time to Something Undefined

Zȳha lyks

☣ @marthawrites☣

Knees

Greed

Darkened Corridors

A Ladies Thrill

Teaching a Dragon New Tricks

Red Lions and Hidden Dragons

A Surprise in the Library

☣ @sepherinaspoppies☣

Whatever May Come Series (Dark Aemond)

Only if for a Night (AU Aemond)

☣ @barbieaemond☣

Iron on Silk

Lykiri

☣ @vsnyarbll☣

I Never Want This to End

The Wound on his Hand

☣ @namelesslosers☣

How long can we be a sad song

A Moment Everybody Knows

A Worthy Exchange (Aemond / Hunger Games AU)

☣ @targaryen-dynasty☣

A Caution for Young Girls

Depravities

Sinful Revenge (Aemond/Aegon)

Lechery

A Dragon to Share (Aemond/Aegon/Daemon)

The Curse of Curiosity

To Stoke a Flame

Dragon Dreams

Rewrite the stars

Forbidden Temptation

Serenity & Can you stay up all night?

☣ @troublesomesnitch☣

Uneasy Lies the Head (Aemond/Aegon)

☣ @the-dendrophile-bookdragon☣

Knife Play

Braids

☣ @aemonds-fire☣

Lady, Wife, Whore, Woman

The Sapphire Spell Series (Ghost Aemond)

☣ @happilyhertale☣

Emerald Eyes

Battlefield of Women

Morning Delight

☣ @sylasthegrim☣

To Love and Cherish

Solace in the Silence (Aemond/Otto)

The present is an interlude

The Romance of certain old clothes

☣ @tumblin-theworldaway☣

Heir

Prey

☣ @st-eve-barnes☣

By Your Side

☣ @adragonprinceswhore☣

Warm Me Up

☣ @flowerandblood☣

Stay and Love, Leave and Die

Flowers & Thorns & Hopes and prayers(sequel)

☣ @aemondfairy☣

Consideration

A little Wicked

☣ @zaldritzosrose☣

Sanguine Obsession

☣ @almondmilktargaryen☣

A son for a son (a debt paid)

☣ @ewanmitchellcrumbs☣

NSFW Alphabet (Headcannons)

Cockwarming Drabble

Asshekhqoyi Vezhvena

Fall Into Me

Relaxing Drabble

☣ @anjelicawrites☣

Nipple Piercing drabble (Osferth/Aemond)

☣ @exitpursuedbyavulcan☣

Studious

☣ @sapphire-writes☣

Flowers

☣ @venmondiese☣

Playing with fire & Burning Fire

☣ @ladythornofrivia☣

My Scavenger (Star wars Crossover)

☣ @wackyharpy☣

A Small Appetence

☣ @bucknastysbabe☣

Misunderstandings (Aemond/Cole)

☣ @fairysluna☣

Truly Yours

☣ @madame-fear☣

Chasing the flame of my desire

☣ @superprincesspea☣

Ghost

☣ @kckt88☣

Demon in my dreams

☣ @cluz1babe☣

NSFW Alphabet

Last Updated 11/2/24

[playbucky]

Navy Boy, Army Girl // 2

Three army medics have been stationed on the ship that Hangman and Rooster have been stationed on for the past month. Y/N and her team have been placed in the middle of the ocean as a half-way marker for any seriously injured soldiers.  Characters – Reader (Ghost), OC Abi, OC Jenkins, Hangman, Rooster, Phoenix.  Word Count – 2.9k. Part 1.

Fourteen Months Later.  ‘Sergeant Major.’ He called, your head lifted, and you looked at him.  ‘Yes Sir?’ You asked. ‘The trainees are here.’ He announced, you arched an eyebrow and straightened.  ‘Trainees?’ You quizzed.  ‘The navy, you’re in charge of them and the training they need to complete.’ He said, you rubbed your lips together before you nodded. He gave you a stiff nod before turned and walked away. You sighed and tilted your head back, the gruelling sun shone down on you.  ‘Lieutenant.’ You called when you spotted the younger man, he stopped and turned to you.  ‘I have check to complete, could you take them to the camp please?’ You asked him, he nodded.  ‘Yes, ma’am.’ He replied, you gave him a polite smile.  ‘Thank you.’ 

‘Sergeant Major, huh?’ The familiar voice said, you raised an eyebrow as you turned to him.  ‘General Lieutenant, huh?’ You replied back, he smiled wide before he brought you in for a hug that you greedily welcomed.   ‘I thought you had been discharged?’ Jake said, you shrugged a shoulder.  ‘I didn’t go through with it, Sandra had a stern talking to me.’ You told him, he arched an eyebrow and nodded, ‘I got better and worked part time at that hospital, before I was put to work again.’ You explained, he hummed.  ‘Should I dare ask the question how long your back for?’ Jake asked, you pursed your lips together as you looked around your home for the undefined amount of time.  ‘No idea, I’ll be here until the war doesn’t need me.’ You told him, he smiled.  ‘That could be a long time, war doesn’t seem to stop.’ He commented.  ‘Yeah, but it’s both what we signed up for, right?’ You asked, he hesitated in nodding.  ‘You look good.’ He changed the subject, you smiled.  ‘Thanks, the scars healed up good.’ You tilted your head to the side so he could see the scars that had died down drastically after fourteen months.  ‘What’s up that you’re on my turf now?’ You asked, already knowing the answer but you wanted to delay moving on.  ‘Our next mission, it -,’ he trailed off, ‘we need to refresh our ground skills.’  ‘Well damn.’ You commented.  ‘Yeah.’  ‘Is the whole group here?’ You asked, he nodded and jutted his chin.   You turned and looked at the group making their way over, they were talking to each other before Rooster said something and Phoenix’s head snapped up, her smile wide.  ‘Y/N.’ She greeted you, carefully wrapping an arm around you, as to not trap the weapon between you.  ‘Phoenix.’ You said, glad that you were seeing her again.  ‘Guys.’ You greeted the others, resting your hands on the handle of your weapon.  ‘How’s the training going?’ You asked, looking over the group that had bags under their eyes, and were scuffing their feet along the sand. The heat would be getting out them, it got to everyone the first week they were on ground.  ‘I think we’ll be sore tomorrow.’ Bob commented, you smiled and nodded. ‘Normally are.’ You commented, a low whistle came, you moved your helmet to the other arm.  ‘Where are you off to then?’ Payback asked, you motioned behind you to the group climbing into a humvee.   ‘About to head out on a ride around, check the perimeter.’ You told them.  ‘Ghost.’ Someone behind called, you looked over your shoulder and gave them a thumbs up.  ‘I’ve got to go but if you’re still here when I’m back we can grab a drink or late dinner.’ You told them, they nodded as you pulled up the face mask that revealed the painted white jawbone and teeth. 

You jogged across the sand, having gotten used to the small grains invading your shoes. You reached the back of the convoy, stretching an arm up and grabbing the pole before you yanked yourself up. You fell into your seat next to Sage and Magpie, who smiled at you.  ‘What are you two smiling like that for?’ You asked them voice slightly muffled by the fabric, they shook their heads.  ‘They’re talking about the eye candy from the navy.’ Spartacus said, you arched your eyebrow and looked at them.  ‘That so? I can hook you up if you want?’ You offered, they shook their heads.  ‘No thank you but we want to know what is going on with you and the navy boy?’ Magpie asked, the entire team all turned to look at you.  ‘What?’ You asked.  ‘Blondie, he can’t take his eyes off you.’ Magpie stated, the corner of your lips curled up as your shook your head.  ‘Hangman, we’re friends, he was on the ship and then he helped when I was in hospital.’ You informed them, Spartacus leaned her head back.  ‘So, it’s him we’ve got to thank for letting us see you?’ Spartacus asked, you nodded.  ‘Yeah, him and Sandra, knocked some sense into me.’ You informed them.  ‘That’s good, think I’ll get him a lovely and warm beer tonight.’ She said, the sarcasm rippled off him.  ‘Don’t be stupid, I put it in the fridge.’   ‘You’re my hero.’ She said, resting a hand on her chest as you laughed and shook your head. 

‘You still up for dinner?’ Phoenix asked, you nodded as you removed your helmet.   ‘Give me five minutes to take everything off.’ You told her, she smiled and watched as you removed the mask.  ‘I’ll gather the boys.’ She informed you, you nodded as your started to unfasten the weighted vest.  You let out a groan at the cooling air brushed your back, the sweat from the ride around chilled to further and caused goosebumps to appear. You set the vest on your bunker, the covers wrinkled before you unfastened the long-sleeved shirt, sliding it off you looked at the white and pink scar that covered your arm. You quickly folded the shirt before pulling the soaked t-shirt off, leaving you in the black sports bra.  ‘Shit. Sorry.’ The familiar voice said, you looked over your shoulder.  ‘You’re fine, Jake.’ You said, he nodded but still adverted his gaze.  ‘A gentleman never looks.’ He said, you scoffed as you pulled the fresh black T-shirt, tucked it into your trousers as you turned to him.  ‘Why are you here anyway?’ You asked him whilst you folded the dirty t-shirt up and set it on the bottom of your bed.  ‘Phoenix ran away from here.’ He stated, a thumb pointed behind him.  ‘And you thought I had turned into the beast?’ You questioned, he started to shake his head.  ‘No, I -,’ he stuttered to a stop.  ‘It’s fine, don’t get much privacy out here anyway.’ You told him, you noticed as his eyes looked over you before his gaze got caught on your arm, where your scars continued down to your forearm. You watched his face twist before he noticed you.  ‘Do they hurt?’ He asked, you wriggled your fingers and looked at the arm he had looked at.  ‘Not anymore,’ you rubbed your arm, ‘sometimes they’ll tingle but not much.’ You truthfully told him and slid your radio onto your waist.  ‘Let’s go then.’ You gestured to the flaps that he had walked through, he nodded and turned around before you grabbed your holster, you fastened it around your thigh and slid the gun in. 

‘Shit.’ You noticed a thick cloud of sand and dust swirl into the air, you straightened to get a better look before you raised your wrist and looked at the time, brows furrowed.  ‘What’s happening?’ Phoenix quizzed, Sage stood up and moved as did Magpie.  ‘Get into the bunkers.’ You pulled your radio off your hip as you looked at the cloud of dust rising that wasn’t from a sandstorm, ‘Now.’ You commanded, they quickly crossed the sand and slid into the large tent that had been their home for the last six days.  ‘Actual one?’ You asked, you bent your knees but kept your gaze on the growing cloud as you pulled your weapon out.  ‘Go ahead.’ The crackled voice replied.  ‘We’re under attack here.’  You informed them, stretching your gun out and watched the vehicles appear in the dust.  ‘Who’s there?’ Actual one asked, a round of bullets was fired. and you ducked.  ‘Myself, Sage, Magpie and the Navy team.’ You said, the radio cracked.  ‘Then you three need to protect them. We’re ten clicks away.’ He said, you closed your eyes, and tilted your head back and sighed.  ‘Understood.’  ‘Sage.’ You called, the radio placed on your hip once more.  ‘Here.’ She appeared at your side.  ‘We’re under attack.’ You said, more bullets were aimed at the base.  ‘Really I thought it was fireworks.’ She commented whilst you rolled your eyes.  ‘The navy team are still here, back up is ten clicks.’ You informed her, her face dropped and she nodded stiffly.  ‘Ten clicks?’ you gave a stiff nod, ‘shit.’  ‘Yeah.’  ‘Teams location?’ Sage questioned.  ‘In the bunkers.’ You said, flinching when a handful of bullets landed in the sand next to you.  ‘I’ll meet you at the bunker.’ Sage said.  You gave her a nod as she pulled away from you, you marched over to the small wall that had been built up of sandbags. You widened your stance and pulled your mask up to cover your mouth and nose, the sand was horrible if it stuck to the back of your throat  ‘Copy.’ You rested your gun against the makeshift wall, lining your eyes up, and you fired, taking out a couple of assailants.  ‘The groups big.’ You said, Magpie tapped your shoulder and you pulled away.  Both of you moved, your backs almost touching as you crossed to the bunkers, the sand sliding under your feet. You reached the bunkers, the cotton door was open, you could just make out the team, huddled together.  ‘Coming around West.’ Sage announced, you kept your gun aimed ahead before the solid pat on your shoulder alerted you.  ‘Nice that you could make it.’ Magpie said, she shrugged.  ‘You know I love attending surprise parties.’ She commented, you smirked and shook your heads.  ‘Why now?’ Sage quizzed as they both glanced at you.  ‘We’re empty and they’ve probably got information that they’re here.’ You said, gesturing your thumb backwards.  Magpie and Sage turned to look at the group, they were sat together and watched them closely, their faces tight as they tried to hide their panic. They knew that being up high, dealing with it and being on the ground was different.  ‘Who knew they were coming?’ Sage asked, you looked out, three black jeeps were pushing their way through the sand, the cloud growing behind them.  ‘They’ve got a rocket launcher.’  ‘They wouldn’t use that right?’ Magpie asked, they knew the odds.  ‘Get in.’ You said, Sage moved backwards, and Magpie followed before you straightened, bullets coming from the East.  You jerked back and lowered your gun before you pulled the binoculars out. Leaning around the edge of the building you tried to find him, you came up empty until the small flash of light gave away his position.  ‘Magpie, East, one point five clicks.’ You said, another bullet was fired at you.  The team watched as Magpie moved to the window, she set her gun up on the ledge and focused through it. The handle rested on her shoulder and she calmed her breathing down.  ‘Upper ridge, every third seconds he reloads and gives his position away.’ You explained, you stepped out from behind the ledge and allowed him to shot at you.  

‘Got him?’ You asked, the room stayed quiet before she pulled the trigger, the team jumped at the loud pop.  ‘He’s down.’ She said.  ‘Copy.’ You replied.   ‘Y/N.’ Sage called out, a hand wrapped around your shoulders and yanked you back.  ‘Stay.’ You yelped out.  The shook caused you to tumble backwards, the attacker took that to his advantage and straddled you, he pointed his gun at you but it was empty. He quickly recovered and flung it to the side, sending a punch into your face. With a grunt you tried to buck your hips but he didn’t budge. He managed to get a punch into the side of your chest, a sharp pain spread through your chest, briefly closing your eyes as you guessed it was a broken rib.   Opening your eyes and looked at him, wrapping your legs over his calves you swung your arm forward and connected with his throat. You managed to get enough force that he gasped for air, using this to your advantage you flipped him over. His back collided with the sand as you held onto the soaked shirt. You continued to punch his face, when he stopped fighting, you looked down. His face was red and swelling as some parts were turning purple. Sitting back on your feet you took deep breaths, trying to calm your racing heartbeat before a force slammed into your chest. ‘We need to help her.’ Jake said, as he watched the second attacker pin you to the ground, Sage moved and blocked his path.  ‘We’ll be shot.’ She said and sent a look to Magpie, they knew the only reason you hadn’t been shot was because you were being attacked. You reached to the side, your fingers just brushed the top of your boot. Grunting you twisted for the side and pulled the handle out, the sharp blade followed, you rotated it hand your hand before you brought your hand up and sliced his throat. The dark blood sprayed out from the wound and leaked into your uniform, you watched as your attackers faced paled but you bucked your hips and he tumbled to the side. You dropped your head back and sighed before you rolled onto you side and held your side as your climbed to your feet. ‘How the fuck did they get that close?’ You asked, the team turned to you. You were a sight, your entire outfit was soaked with blood as it seeped into your outfit. You were breathing heavily and you grip on the blade hadn’t eased up. Sage and Magpie spun around and you raised a knife at the quiet footsteps sounded behind you.  ‘We don’t know.’ Spartacus said, you narrowed your eyes at her then you looked to Hangman and the team, your shoulders slouched.  ‘Where were you going?’ You quizzed.  ‘Perimeter check.’ He stated, you shook your head.  ‘No, you were too far away.’ You said, brows furrowed as you folded and slid the knife back into your boot.  ‘Major said to expand it tonight, credible threats.’ Spartacus stated, you shook your head.  'Shit.' You cursed.

[starlight-soup]

"so much of our lives is just carving through the dark / to get so far and the hardest part / is who we are, it's who we are" shut the FUCK up. "darling we sacrificed / we gave our time to something undefined" i'm SOBBING on the floor. "you only feel it when it's lost / getting through still has its cost / quietly it slips through your fingers love / falling from you drop by drop" i'm being BURIED in the ground

[itsclydebitches]

There's something I find pretty messed up about Little's part of the story. Penny is dead. The story puts focus on this and how it's effecting Ruby and is why Little's death is what breaks Ruby. The volume ends though with Little coming back so it's a happy end, right? Except Penny is still dead and never coming back. And they are going back to a world where people die when they are killed. It's like "Forget about your dead friend cause we got one where your actions don't have consequences."

Yeah, that's an issue with the Ascension arc as a whole. As discussed previously, we're already starting from a place of confusing messages because the world can't decide what Ascension exactly is. Some beings lose all their memories and (arguably as a result) their sense of self. Some just seem to get cool upgrades. Some change in such monumental ways they probably can't go back to their old life even if they wanted to (can Somewhat ever live with the other mice again now that they're like fifty times their size?). And some, Like Ruby, undergo no changes at all except a convenient and ambiguous ~emotional clarity~

So Ascension is a catch-all "Anything could happen" situation where all options, no matter how shady they appear to the audience, are eventually presented as #good by the show... except I'm 100% sure they only come across that way BECAUSE they happen to side characters we're not invested in/are leaving behind. Would people honestly have been happy if Ruby:

Completely forgot who she was (King)

Got some crazy physical upgrade that would fundamentally change the power dynamics of the show/other her in Remnant/imply that she's a faunus to strangers if she got some animal trait (the Caterpillar/Somewhat)

Came away with a new "purpose" and decided she didn't want to be a Huntress anymore (the Paper Pleasers)

There's a reason Ruby did not change except to inexplicably regain her confidence because the show and on some level recognizes that these options are indeed an awful kind of "death," something that would be bad to do to your main character (baring a monumental shift in the show). When we talk about the importance of growth (in real life and in fiction) we're referencing a context in which a person changes slowly over time, adapting to each change in a natural way, all of it a combination of environmental factors and personal agency. To just have some magical tree instantly change you without consent, making you "better" by its own, undefined parameters... that's not wonderful, that's horrifying! But as you say, even if we overlook all that and come at Ascension from a direction the story wants, accepting and praising such an aspect of this world... Team RWBY doesn't live in that world. What did they learn from this then? Yay for people who live in alternate realities because they get to become "better" rather than dying? Good for them, but our friends are still dead and our lives are still on the line.

If RWBY wanted this arc they not only needed to reeeeeally clean up what Ascension is/how it works, but decide on the message they're trying to impart. Because what we got, on a literal level, is Ruby being depressed enough to choose ending (that version of) her life, instead being rewarded for that choice by a pantheon she's kinda fighting against (in a way that both skips her development and ignores every other implied rule of Ascension), and is returning to a world where none of this matters because death is a Permanent Thing That She's Going to Be Seeing a Whole Lot More of Soon.

Penny is dead. Many other allies are dead. Weiss' Kingdom is gone. Salem is set to exterminate the rest of Remnant, and instead of dealing with any of that Volume 9 gave Team RWBY a (literal) fantasy world where everything is just fine, actually. Wouldn't it be cool if no one actually died and whenever it seems like they did they'd just come back as an upgraded version of themselves? Yeah! Too bad that's not the reality they're heading back to.

Honestly, the way to clean up all of Volume 9 for me is to slap a "It was just a dream" disclaimer on it. Volume 10 we learn that Ruby had a crazy, contradictory fever dream post-battle in which the biggest trauma she's ever faced is magically fixed by her subconscious? Yeah, that tracks. More than taking Volume 9 at face value.

[arcielee]

My House of the Dragons masterlist. Please be mindful of each story's tags and warnings!

modern Aemond masterlist modern Aemond Targaryen x Female!Reader Warnings: Please be mindful of the warnings for each story! Author’s Note: Just a masterlist of my ever-growing modern Aemond Targaryen stories. Enjoy! 💜

A love that burns. Aemond Targaryen x Female!Reader [third person] Summary: Aemond is a man obsessed and you are the object of his unwavering devotion.

+ + + +

Ābrazȳrys dark!Aemond Targaryen x Wife!Reader Summary: Aemond goes to see is the king is truly dead and finds his wife instead.

+ + + +

dōna mandia Aemond Targaryen x Sister!Reader x Aegon Targaryen [third person] Summary: Her brothers convince her to play a game.

+ + + +

Hae iksā Aemond Targaryen x Plus Size Reader Summary: Aemond has been tasked to find himself a wife.

+ + + +

ilībio Aemond Targaryen x Female!Reader Summary: Aemond finds comfort in your cunt.

+ + + +

Zȳha lyks Aemond Targaryen x Plus Size Reader Summary: You find an ally with the second son of King Viserys.

She Walks in Starlight Aemond!Hades x OFC!Persephone Summary: Greek mythology HotD AU, some Aemond!Hades x OFC!Persephone slow burn.

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The Dragon and the Wolf - WIP Aemond Targaryen x Stark!reader Summary: “...perhaps the fire of a Targaryen prince is what is needed to thaw out your heart.”

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Ours never knew peace. Aemond Targaryen x Stark!Reader [first person] Summary: On the morning of the Great Tourney of Harrenhal, Lyanna Stark's granddam visits to give her an heirloom, a necklace with a sapphire stone...

There's not one thing that I would change. Aemond Targaryen x Stark!Reader [first person] Author's Note: This is what was implied, the smutty interlude that granddam could not read out loud to Lyanna.

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Quietly, it slips through your fingers - Part 1 Aemond Targaryen x Rhaena Targaryen Summary: Rhaena confronts Aemond after dinner.

We gave our time to something undefined - Part 2 Aemond Targaryen x Rhaena Targaryen Summary: Aemond receives a late night visitor.

+ + + +

Only If For A Night Aemond Targaryen x Female! Reader, Aegon Targaryen x Female!Reader Summary: You find comfort in your husband's brother.

The Sapphire Prince Aemond Targaryen x OFC!Stark Summary:  A Targaryen prince falls for Cregan Stark’s sister and it sets to tear apart the Hightower’s devise.

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Call It Dreaming Aemond Targaryen x Modern!FemReader Summary: You have a delightful sex dream.

modern Aegon masterlist modern Aegon Targaryen x Female!Reader Warnings: Please be mindful of the warnings for each story! Author’s Note: Just a masterlist of my ever-growing modern Aegon Targaryen stories. Enjoy! 💜

Call It Dreaming Aegon Targaryen x Modern!FemReader Summary: You have a delightful sex dream.

+ + + +

Only If For A Night Aemond Targaryen x Female! Reader, Aegon Targaryen x Female!Reader Summary: You find comfort in your husband's brother.

dōna mandia Aemond Targaryen x Sister!Reader x Aegon Targaryen [third person] Summary: Her brothers convince her to play a game.

+ + + +

Fare Well Aegon Targaryen x Female!Reader Summary: You visit Aegon after another council meeting ends.

dōna riña Daemon Targaryen x Rhaenyra Targaryen x Female!Reader Summary: You are enraptured by the prince and princess.

+ + + +

ānogar Daemon Targaryen x Wife!Reader Summary: Your husband helps comfort you.

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Aōhon iksan Daeron Targaryen x Female!Reader [third person] Summary: Daeron has come back from Oldtown to play his role in King’s Landing and marry one of the Four Storms.

+ + + +

At last, when all of the world is asleep Ser Erryk Cargyll x Dornish!Reader Summary:  A Dornish princess is the siren call to break the vows of the Kingsguard.

Devotion Ser Erryk Cargyll x Targaryen!Reader Summary: You are a Targaryen princess with an infatuation on a certain White Cloak.

+ + + +

A night of pleasure. Ser Gwayne Hightower x Female!Reader Summary: Ser Gwayne decides on you.

gifs by @mojogifs || arcie's navigation

[mariaofdoranelle]

Look at Us Now - ch. 23

Fic masterlist

I’ve been writing this chapter amidst chaos and I was obsessed while planning this spicy scene. I hope you like it? The writing process wasn’t half as sexy, considering I have terrible flu 🤧

Warnings: NSFW

Words: 2,2k

The groaning creak of Aelin’s rusty window being opened jolted her awake. She shot up in bed, heart racing, only to register Rowan’s hulky figure invading her bedroom.

She threw herself back in bed, relieved and slightly less annoyed. “Alexa, what time is it?”

“You already know you’re late. The time is 6:42 a.m.”

Rowan sighed, finally inside, and closed her squeaky window. “I forgot how sassy your Alexa is.”

Rubbing both eyes, she slowly processed whatever was going on. Yesterday’s fight over Fleetfoot the Dog. Aelin’s late—and depressingly lonely—wine night. Rowan showed up here when she specifically told him not to.

“I took Maisie to Aedion’s, they’re going to the pool.” He stuffed his hands in his pockets, shuffling his feet. “We need to talk.”

“Where’s the key I gave you?”

“I didn’t know how you’d feel about me using it now.” After their fight, he meant.

“So you’d rather break into my house through my bedroom window instead?”

Rowan eyed her reading armchair, but decided to pace instead. Aelin could barely pay attention to him, only thinking about how she asked him for time to process the situation, but instead he decided to wake her up right after dawn to talk.

Aelin adjusted her pillows to sit by the headboard. “Did Maisie wake you up early today?”

“I didn’t sleep.”

She ran both hands on her face, trying to recall her last thoughts regarding the doggie situation. If Rowan wanted to make decisions alone rather than considering her opinions as a couple, she could go with it. “I want 50/50 custody of Fleetfoot, same co-parenting arrangement and shared expenses as we do with Maisie. I already made a new expense spreadsheet.”

“So you want the dog?”

“Oh my God.” Aelin leaned her head against the headboard, looking up. “Rowan, this is not about the dog!”

He furrowed his eyebrows, his eyes carefully assessing her, and that’s when she realized he was lost.

Taking a deep breath, she tried to phrase her feelings in the clearest way possible. “If I’m Maisie’s mother, if we’re together, and if you see yourself living with me within the next decade, I don’t understand why you’d get her a dog without talking to me first.”

“Very well.” His body tensed, both hands on his hips. “Another 50/50 custody. That’s what we’re doing, then?”

“Yes. That’s how I deal with things when I ask for time to think and you don’t give it to me.”

He resumed pacing around the room, one hand on his hip while he gesticulated with the other. “Look, I want to give you space, but I can’t sit and do nothing while you rethink our relationship.”

Aelin tilted her head, eyes squinted at him. Now she was the one who was lost. “While I do what?”

Rowan huffed, a hard look aimed at her. “You know…”

“I really don’t.”

“You pushed me away because you didn’t trust me.” Rowan sat on her armchair, eyes narrowed at a random point. She gave him time, knowing he wasn’t great at expressing himself or his feelings. “Now you gave me a second chance, and things are still delicate because I’m still proving myself.”

“Proving yourself…?” Aelin trailed, trying to understand his train of thought.

“That I deserve your second chance.” His voice slowed down as he sensed her confusion. “That you can rely on me in a way you didn’t before.”

Aelin’s mouth opened. And closed. It was a rare feat to make Aelin speechless, but Rowan did it this time. Had he been thinking like that for the past month?

“I was in a very vulnerable place five years ago, and our relationship was too undefined. I barely had the energy to think about something romantic between us, let alone fight for it.” Aelin fiddled with the corner of her blanket, feeling Rowan’s gaze on her, hanging on her every word. She continued, “That’s not the case now. I told you why I pushed you away back then because the situation called for it, but I don’t want to torment you over something you did so long ago.” She sent him a close-lipped, hope-to-be-reassuring smile. “Besides, I already know I can trust you. Did you ever fail with Maisie?”

A bitter chuckle. “Yes. Several times.”

Aelin left her position on her bed to straddle him at the armchair, her chest filled with warmth. “Well, you wouldn’t be a parent if you didn’t.” She combed his hair off his face with her fingers. Her fussy Buzzard, always thinking too much. He’d just started therapy, and Aelin knew it’d be a long process until the worst of that weight fell off his shoulders, but she’d be right there with him the entire time. “Your very chivalrous theory about needing to prove your worth was totally debunked, being Super Dad and all.”

“I was a terrible co-parent to you.”

“Me too.” Aelin put both hands on her hips, eyes squinted at him. “Are you putting me on a trial test?”

“I would never—“

She raised both eyebrows, silently begging him to think this through. Yeah, buddy, it goes both ways, she hoped her face conveyed.

“So, just to be sure, you’re not breaking up with—“

“Gods, Rowan!”

“Alright, alright.”

He held her close, face resting near her neck while he breathed her in. Aelin kissed his head, squeezing him into her embrace. Sometimes, when she’s with Rowan, no amount of touching feels like enough. Right now, she felt like melting and merging their bodies completely so every cell of her body hugs every cell of his. It was so silly, but it did feel like heaven to hear his mocking groans, as if Rowan hated being squished to death.

Aelin grinned down at him, still straddling his lap, and cupped his face with both hands. “You’re mine.”

He kissed her palm. “I’m yours.”

“And you love me,” she said. Not a question.

“To whatever end,” he breathed.

She leaned to kiss him, meeting him halfway. What started as a tender kiss soon turned molten. Rowan’s hands traveled down her torso, hungrily grabbing her, as Aelin ravished his mouth, full of need while grinding down on his lap from how much her body burned for him.

Rowan hooked both hands under her thighs and lifted them up from the armchair, carrying Aelin to her bed. He dropped her in a seating position and caged her with both arms, still standing while pressing their foreheads together.

“You’re mine.” His eyes were glued to hers and so close, she felt the claiming in her bones, her soul.

“I’m yours.” Her answer was as truthful as the throbbing between her thighs—very.

“And you love me.” Such hope and quiet joy in his eyes, beneath all that fierceness.

“To whatever end.” Beaming at him, she radiated with the intensity of that moment and needed to show him how much she meant it.

Rowan kissed her again, dragging the moment until Aelin nipped his lip. He opened his mouth to protest, but when she felt him through his pants, it melted into a hiss.

Aelin dropped to her knees in front of him.

“Baby, you don’t have to—“

He cursed when she pulled her pants down. Aelin kept eye contact while she pumped him, trying to hide a smirk. The words died on his throat, mesmerized by the sight of her face and his cock so close. He held still while she licked the head, but Rowan’s eyes closed, his head lolling back when her tongue ran over his full length.

Aelin knew she didn’t have to but, fuck, she wanted to. She pumped his heavy, veiny length, panting, entranced. How a guy used his cock had always been something she valued more than the member in itself, but it was definitely a flex that her boyfriend came with both traits. Her need to be filled was driving her mad, but Aelin was dying to worship him too.

One more swirl of her tongue and she took him deep inside her mouth, quickly finding a rhythm. Cheeks hollowed, Aelin also worked him by massaging his base and his balls—it was near impossible to swallow all of him, no matter her attempts to deep-throat his cock.

Rowan’s eyes were glued to the way he disappeared into her mouth, and he kept praising her, guiding her head with his fist and hissing when he hit a particular spot near her throat, then again calling her a good girl that sucks his cock so well.

“Fuck, baby.” Rowan thrust into her mouth, and she was growing almost feverish with the sight of him using her for his own pleasure.

One of her hands disappeared between her thighs without interrupting his ministrations, but it only worsened the burning feeling she tried to soothe. A moment later, Rowan cursed at how wet it came back to toy with his balls.

“Baby.” He caressed her jaw, holding her gaze. “Fuck. The things I’m doing to you after this…”

Aelin moaned around his cock, almost losing her rhythm. His hips jerked, making him grip her hair harder.

He growled, “You have no idea.”

˜˜

“Must you tell her everything?” Rowan politely complained, jaw tight.

Aelin gaped. “But she’s our therapist!” Her defensive remark had a slightly higher pitch.

Yrene had her lips pressed tight to hide her amusement. Her job was to meddle in their relationship, but sometimes she chose not to—especially during a small bicker.

The woman cleared her throat. “It looks to me that you both communicated your thoughts and feelings on your own, mid crisis, while shielding your daughter from it." Yrene had a satisfied, close-lipped smile on while she typed on her computer. "That’s impressive progress. In fact, I feel like we’re ready to space out our sessions, so we can gradually transition you two out of therapy.”

Aelin felt a lightness inside, and her grin was almost too much. Hell yes, she was more than ready to cut off some sessions—if she counted her individual ones as well, Aelin saw Yrene way too much.

However, Rowan frowned, not looking convinced. “But we just had a fight.”

Their therapist waved him off. “You will from time to time. The important thing here is to identify when you’re falling into an old pattern, and to revisit conflict management skills when—not if—needed.” Yrene tilted her head, carefully studying Rowan. “But I can wait more to space out sessions if you don’t feel ready yet, even if I’m not discharging you immediately.”

His eyes darted between the two women, unsure.

“Baby, I think we’re good.” Aelin squeezed Rowan’s hands. She worked with a whole different way of looking inside her patients, but she knew how successful this case was.

“We won’t be working on new skills from now on, just maintaining what you already learned,” Yrene added, focused on Rowan. “Besides, I already consider your case successful. Couples don’t often get back together, let alone in a healthy relationship—sometimes, I’m only trying to prevent murder.”

The corner of his mouth quivered, and he squeezed Aelin’s hand back. “Alright, then. How often is it gonna be for now?”

˜˜

“Gods, I feel so spiritually evolved.” Aelin matched her boyfriend’s grin outside Yrene’s office, in the building’s hallway. “Every time a therapist praises me, I feel like lighting incense and doing yoga.”

Rowan hummed, wrapping his arm around her while they waited for the elevator. “Yoga’s nice. We could try it out—“

“Fuck, no. You promised me chocolate cake.”

“I didn’t mean now.” He studied her from the corner of his eye. “Tomorrow?”

“Nope.” Not ever, if she could help it—Aelin doing exercises about balance while having a giant bump that messed her center of gravity up? Scarred her to death. “I have a hip replacement tomorrow. Did you know that performing those is worse than CrossFit?”

“No, it’s not.” Rowan snorted. “You told me they were super easy when you were pregnant with…”

Realization made him lose his words. To Aelin’s defense, it was just a little white lie she told so he wouldn’t lose his mind with worry. Rowan’s eyes widened, and Aelin was saved by the elevator arriving at that exact moment. She hurried past him inside and watched him slowly enter, still staring at her.

The elevator moved, restarting him as well. She shook his head and stood behind her. Noting that they were alone in that metal box, Rowan grabbed her hips with both hands and whispered, “I’m punishing you for that later.”

Aelin shivered with his words fanning against her ear, feeling a whisper of his smirk when she trembled under his fingertips. Slightly pressed against him, she breathed, “I bet you are.”

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[loveandpeaceanddoughnuts]

AOT Characters as songs/lyrics from Unreal, Unearth by Hozier

Mikasa to Eren: “Do you know, I could break beneath the weight / Of the goodness, love, I still carry for you?” Unknown/Nth

Connie, Sasha, Jean: "I will not be great / But I'm grateful to get through / The feeling came late / I'm still glad I met you" Abstract (Psychopomp)

Reiner: "In summer's heat, I learned to dread, the comin' of the night / The awful things we do to make the head go quiet" To Someone From a Warm Climate (Uiscefhuaraithe)

Levi: “These days, I think I owe my life / To flowers that were left here by my mother / Ain't that like them, giftin' life to you again / This life lived mostly underground / Unknowin' either sight nor sound / Till reachin' up for sunlight just to be ripped out by the stem” First Time

Hange: “And though I burn, how could I fall / When I am lifted by every word you say to me? / If anything could fall at all, it's the world / That falls away from me” I, Carrion (Icarian)

The Yeagers: “You and I burned out our steam / Chasing someone else's dream / How can something be so much heavier / But so much less than what it seems / Darling, we sacrificed / We gave our time to something undefined / This phantom life sharpens like an image / But it sharpens like a knife” Who We Are

[akenya]

Rizzoli and Isles is actually a show about a Queerplatonic Relationship.

Okay hear me out.

So, I always have shipped Rizzles. There are many MANY ways in which these are queer coded characters with a heavy romantic subtext, that a lot of the time honestly bleeds into the maintext. A lot of the actions and dialogue that we would typically interpret as romantic, especially between a hetero pairing, certainly works for this show. 

But I did a re-watch of the show recently, and while I still ship them romantically, I actually think what is being portrayed between them is something else. They are DEFINITELY more than friends; I mean they are life partners in every sense of the word. But the kind of dynamic that is CANONICALLY portrayed between Maura and Jane, is in fact, a Queerplatonic Relationship.

So here’s a working definition of the term for those who aren’t familiar with it: 

Queerplatonic relationships and queerplatonic partnerships are committed intimate relationships which are not romantic in nature. They may differ from usual close friendships by having more explicit commitment, validation, status, structure, and norms, similar to a conventional romantic relationship

I have actually experienced something like this, (and yes I’m going to get a bit anecdotally personal here; I’ll try not to be too long winded, but it’s relevant, I promise lol): 

I had an (unspoken) kind of relationship like this with my best friend in my early/mid 20s. We have been best friends since I was 11, but something definitely shifted when we became adults, and I have to say, I ended up, quite unexpectedly, being deeply in love with my best friend...platonically. I didn’t want to date her. I didn’t want to sleep with her. But, I was totally devoted to her and we were each other’s person for years. We were each other’s assumed plus one for everything, we regularly did dinner dates, we gave each other super sentimental cards and specialized gifts on birthdays, we also regularly did domestic shit together like grocery shopping, errands, chores, house projects; you name it, we had it/did it. I mean we were even each other’s phone background for a while lmao. We never lived together, but we had keys to each other’s places. 

Now a lot of this shit can happen and does happen in standard friendships (maybe not the phone background thing; that was super gay ngl hahaha), but the thing that made this different was the level of assumed partnership going on between us. And the...energy. We would stare deeply into each other’s eyes. We had that magnetic kind of magic with each other, like no matter where the other is in the room, we find our way back to each other. And people literally perceived us as a couple. Hell, my other friends teased us about it. 

Any of this sound familiar?

Oh and I DO find her to be attractive and even sexy. And we flirted (still do lolol) a LOT. 

But I didn’t ever really.....actually want to have sex with her. Not that I would’ve even necessarily been opposed to it, because we were so close, but it just, wasn’t ever a desire for me.

This was interesting to experience, because I do identify as a lesbian, I have been romantically attracted to people, sexually attracted to people, and the two, as society expects, do usually go hand in hand for me. But with her, I honestly could’ve seen forever; like being exactly as we were, as life partners, I could’ve even seen myself raising kids with her, and I would have been TOTALLY, GENUINELY content with it, ‘cause my relationship with her filled me up in a way nothing else has. This was confusing as all hell to me for a long time, because I didn’t have a name for this until recently when I learned about the concept of Queerplatonic Relationships which again supersede friendship and often are life partnerships, but aren’t inherently romantic or sexual, even though they are quite deep. I actually think QPRs speak to that “limitless” “otherwise undefinable” kind of relationship dynamic. 

Sooo - and I promise I’m wrapping my story up - when my bff met her current boyfriend, which is her first super serious adult relationship, I didn’t quite experience jealousy, I mean I always envisioned a romantic partnership for her, and I still want that for me! Buuuut...my feelings were complicated because it’s like...I had to mourn what I lost, as our dynamic inherently changed, and the fact that I wasn’t her person anymore. Weird thing to process indeed. Also *ahem* SOUND FAMILIAR?

Without getting too carried away here (oh who am I kidding, I already have 😂) for comparison’s sake, I actually went through a crazy ass heartbreak with someone, also while I was in my mid 20s; someone to whom I WAS romantically, sexually, spiritually, connected and attracted. I mean I was IN LOVE with this woman and she broke my heart by not fully reciprocating my feelings and not wanting to be with me. I thought I was gonna die when we stopped talking. Hell, it’s been years and I still think about her. 

But if you were to ask me who the true love. of. my. life. has been so far...I’d pick my best friend! 

The funny thing is I think a LOT of women end up in these kinds of dynamics, ESPECIALLY queer women, maybe even more so queer women who form super close relationships to “straight” women (gotta put str8 in quotes ‘cause...this shit is inherently queer even though it’s not romantic/sexual). You all know what I’m talking about; You’d do anything for each other, there’s chemistry, connection, and care, yet it doesn’t quite fit into any box you try to give it. People read you as a couple. You know this about yourselves, and you just...accept it. Because what you have is actually beyond any label. You know?

Anyway, I think there’s actually something cool and radical about this and I know that queer people want and deserve romantic and sexual representation, but I think this IS an accurate kind of representation that happens all the time that isn’t appropriately covered or discussed in media.

In hindsight, I think that’s what really hooked me on R&I. I mean, I started watching ‘cause I thought they were lesbians, and I kept watching ‘cause I thought it would be canon! And yeah, I still think about what could’ve been with them: fanfiction is good for that. But why do I still watch the actual show? Well...I LIVED it. 

Now: do I think that Maura and Jane often tip the scales a lil’ TOOOOO far in the explicitly gay direction on this show? Oh hell yes! Do I think you can interpret them as two people who are madly in love, romantically, with each other, yet are too scared to do anything about it? Oh hell yes! Like I said I do ship Rizzles. BUT, if I’m honest about what is FULLY, CANONICALLY being portrayed, no subtext, ALL maintext: It’s 10000% a QPR. 

So no: Maura Isles and Jane Rizzoli are certainly not JUST friends. They aren’t just colleagues, although their work relationship is just as powerful and awe inspiring as their personal one. They aren’t really like sisters, although they can quarrel like siblings at times. They aren’t truly romantic, although they are essentially life partners. They aren’t in a sexual relationship with each other; not that it couldn’t go there, but I also see how it wouldn’t need to go there, and how that doesn’t diminish the bond at all. They have something that I recognize -and something I think perhaps many of us recognize too- something beyond definition, because at the core of it they are true-blue soulmates who share a kind of unconditional love that is rarely found in ANY kind of relationship. If there is a definition that comes close to summing this kind of thing up: Queerplatonic Relationship is the answer!

Idk just felt like sharing this. Thanks for reading 🤓

[sixeyesofanxiety]

You only feel it when it's lost

Getting through still has a cost

Quietly, it slips through your fingers, love

Falling from you drop by drop

What I had left here

I just held it tight

So someone with your eyes

Might come in time

To hold me like water

Or Christ, hold me like a knife

You and I burned out our steam

Chasing someone else's dream

How can something be so much heavier

But so much less than what it seems?

Darling, we sacrificed

We gave our time to something undefined

This phantom life

Sharpens like an image

But it sharpens like a knife

"Who we are" by hozier is so them

[tala-bez-i]

At first sight Chapter Three

(m!reader x Bonten!Haruchiyo Sanzu)  

Fluff/slash/reader is male/cursing/BontenTimeline/drugs and alcohol mentioned/violence/blood/death

Haruchiyo Sanzu, Haitani brothers, Shuji Hanma and Kisaki Tetta belong to Ken Wakui.  

Words: 3665

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

The air outside was cool and fresh, a nice change from the stuffy officeroom. 

Stuffy... - you thought about what Hanma would have to clean up and cover up. Good job. Awesome. 

Right next to the back entrance to the building there was a small delivery van parked, from which three men, who were Hanma's helpers for the evening, got out. One of them was carrying a box of cleaning supplies that would be used to clean up the mess. 

Rindou lit a cigarette, took a deep drag and slowly exhaled the smoke, which disappeared into the air, leaving behind an intense, not necessarily unpleasant smell. You preferred the smell of his cigarettes to the smell of the weed that Sanzu sometimes smoked. Ran looked at his watch and smiled slightly. 

“It's almost 3 a.m.” he looked at you and Sanzu. “I think it's time to call it a night and go home, gentlemens. See you in a few hours at the meeting.” 

The younger Haitani gave you a small wave and walked with his brother towards their car, which they had left parked in the back parking lot. 

You stared after them for a moment, and only when they drove away did you let out a breath you didn't even realize you were holding. Meeting at the base... You couldn't wait. 

“So…” Sanzu said and started searching through the pockets of his jacket. “So, we did our job... 85% job done. Pretty good result, right?” 

You looked at the dark sky. All the stars were obscured by rain clouds. You were surprised that it still hadn't started raining - maybe the sound of the rain would clear your mind like it always did. 

“It was one of the easiest jobs to do. The score should be 100%, minimum 90%, Sanzu.” you closed your eyes for a moment and sighed quietly. “Tetta will be unhappy.” 

“He'll get over it. Besides, he has little say in the matter.” the pink-haired one grumbled. “If he doesn't like something, maybe he'll get out there himself and do something.” 

You looked at him surprised. Sanzu often complained about Kisaki, but it had been a long time since he had said anything like that about one of Bonten's strategists. 

“I know you're number 2, Sanzu… but…” 

Sanzu pulled out a small pill bottle and raised it to eye level to see how much content was left. "Shut up." he said quietly to you and, saying something quietly under his breath, he poured two pills into his hand and swallowed them immediately. 

"Not too much?" 

“Let's go to the car.” Sanzu ignored your question and walked down the narrow alley to the main street. You had a few minutes of walking to the place where you left your car that you came in. 

“Sanzu, personally I think you've taken enough drugs today.” you caught up with him and saw that he had poured the rest of the contents of the bottle into his hand. He counted the pills - there were 6 left. You frowned. “How many pieces are in one bottle?” 

The man was silent for a moment and poured the pills back into the bottle, which he carefully placed in the pocket of the vest he wore under his jacket. 

“Sanzu…” 

"20 pieces." he replied in a slightly irritated voice. 

"20 pieces?" you thought for a moment and stopped, catching him just above the elbow. "One sec. Isn't this a new bottle?” 

Sanzu looked at your hand with an undefined expression, though you could have sworn there was something cold in his eyes for a split second. Haru looked up at your face and you could look into his bright eyes that always made your heartbeat faster - no matter what was hidden in them. 

"And what about it?" he asked quietly. "I know what I'm doing. They're not as strong as you think, so obviously I need to take them more often." 

“Haru, your body has already become resistant to the effects of these drugs…” 

"Shut up." this time, his tone was sharper, and you were ready for him to pull his arm from your grasp, but he didn't. "Do not tell me what to do. I don't interfere with your addiction..." 

“You did it at the club today.” you interrupted him and Sanzu's face turned red for a moment. “And it's not an addiction... I don't drink every day.” 

“I made an exception because you are a driver!” the pink-haired one growled. 

"I understand sorry. I needed a drink.” you let go of his arm and rubbed your face. “I promise that next time I won't drink alcohol, you don't have to get so angry. It didn’t bother you before.” 

You shrugged slightly and continued on your way to the car. After a while, you heard Sanzu's footsteps behind you. He didn't fall in line with you like he usually did, but he followed you the entire way. You wondered what was going on in his head at that moment, and for a split second you thought that maybe Sanzu was about to pull out a gun... 

You looked over your shoulder and asked quietly, “Hey, are you okay?”

Sanzu walked with his head down and the fingers of his hand moving as if he was counting something. He looked up at the sound of your voice and the corner of his mouth lifted slightly. 

“Yes, everything's okay. I'm just trying to figure out how much stock I have left and how to dispose of it until the next delivery.” he replied in a calm tone and you sighed softly. The whole of Sanzu, at one moment an outbreak of aggression, and at another moment peace of mind and any attempts at logical thinking. 

“Oh my…” he laughed softly and shook his head. “I still can't stop thinking about that girl from the club.” 

“About Mina?” you asked disgusted. 

"No." he grimaced and fell into step with you, which made you happy because it meant his anger was probably gone. “I mean that girl who bumped into you.” 

“Ah, she.” you bit the inside of your cheek lightly. “Did you like her?” 

Haru laughed softly and looked at you, amused. “And not you? Petite, cute, maybe a little shy and unnecessarily scared.” he sniffed slightly. “If she gave me a chance, she would have a lot of fun. I would dance with her a few times, maybe even invite her to my place? Who knows, who knows?” 

“You're daydreaming. She wouldn’t go with you willingly.” 

“But with you, yes. You would share with a friend.” he nudged your arm a few times. 

"Absolutely not." 

"Of course. You always share.” Sanzu was offended. 

You frowned and looked at him. “You spring into action when I'm not around.” 

The pink-haired man shrugged. “You didn't suggest a threesome, so I waited until you were done. Easy." 

Outraged, you nudged him harder in the shoulder and he looked at you, amused. “I didn't suggest it because you prefer very submissive ones, but I prefer them to move on their own.” 

“You can't always have what you want, so you have to take what you already have.” he muttered in amusement, looking away. 

"You are horrible. You know you don't have to drug them to make them comply." 

“4 out of 10 go to bed with me voluntarily. And they're not always the ones I like." Sanzu tried to justify himself. “In most cases, I have to pay them anyway.” 

“Sarah went with you willingly and didn't want your money.” you reminded him about the economics student, Sanzu blushed slightly. “Ha! You liked her!" 

He shrugged and huffed slightly irritated. “Yes, at the beginning. Just a lunatic."

"What are you talking about?" you looked at him surprised. “You looked nice together and she was willing to sacrifice her future career for you.” 

“You have no idea what you're talking about... Sarah... Or rather, Reiko was crazy, and not jokingly. She stalked me for almost half a year.” 

You walked in silence, surprised by this information. You remembered the girl well and she didn't seem dangerous to you. You could sooner call Sanzu a stalker than her... Although... You remembered how one time Haru asked you to send a few emails from his computer and then you saw that his mailbox was full of messages with very similar content from a dozen or so different addresses. You also remembered the completely ruined paint of the pink-haired's new car. You also cannot forget about the dozens, if not hundreds, of bouquets of flowers in the hall of the building where Sanzu had his apartment. 

"Wait. Just a moment…” you placed a hand on Sanzu’s shoulder and turned him towards you. “Are you telling me that these e-mails… flowers and car are the work of this student?” 

Sanzu's eyes were filled with anger mixed with embarrassment, so you decided it would be best not to laugh. Still, the tone of your voice betrayed amusement. “Oh shit, you found someone like you, didn't you?” 

"Shut up." the other said quietly and pushed your hand off his shoulder. His handsome face was almost red. 

You cleared your throat to stop laughing and continued towards the car. “I'm curious... what's going on with her now. Did she go back to university, or did someone report her and get her locked up?” 

“Nothing is going on with her.” Sanzu replied with cold indifference. 

"Nothing? But how?" you looked at him curiously and when he didn't answer you, you realized the meaning of his words. “Oh fuck. Okay, that was off topic.” you said quietly and took your car keys out of your pants pocket. "I have no more questions." 

You got into the car and fastened your seat belts. You started the engine and headed back to Sanzu's apartment. 

“Okay, maybe I have a few more questions.” you said after a while and Sanzu let out a long groan which you decided to ignore. “Did you cover up all your traces? Fuck, I don't want you to be linked to her murder.” 

“They didn't find the body.” he said reluctantly. 

“So, with the disappearance.” 

“No one reported her missing.” 

“And the university? She was a student after all.” you frowned slightly. 

“Like you said before, she was willing to sacrifice her future career for me.” Sanzu leaned his head against the window and pulled out the pill bottle again. 

“She dropped out of university?” you looked at him surprised and laughed quietly, focusing on driving again. “God, Sanzu. I can't remember when you had such an influence on someone." 

“You don't attract fuckers like me.” he replied and opened the glove compartment to start looking for something in it. 

“My ex wasn't exactly normal.” you said in a calm tone. “We were supposed to get married, but she left me for someone else about a month before the ceremony. She thought I wasn't the right match for her because I was in a gang. But she married a guy who beats her all the time. I never raised my voice to her, let alone my hand.” 

"I'm sorry." he replied and pulled out a bottle from the glove compartment that you had never seen before. 

"What is this?" you asked surprised, when you stopped at the traffic lights you looked at him reproachfully. “You don't store your drugs in my car, Sanzu, do you?” 

"Only this. Don't worry." he poured the last few pieces into a new bottle and put everything in his jacket. 

“Sanzu!” 

"Come on. It's just one bottle.” he muttered indignantly. 

“I'd rather know what's in my car. I don't want to be arrested at a police check!' 

“Then don't get behind the wheel under the influence of alcohol. Easy." the pink-haired one commented and then added in a calm tone. “I won't leave drugs in your car again... Or at least I'll try not to.” 

You huffed softly and moved on as soon as the lights turned green. “Really, you are impossible, Sanzu. Next time just let me know what you leave in my car… or in my apartment.” 

Neither of you said anything for a moment, but when you saw the concentration on Sanzu's face, you knew he was counting again, and his hands were moving around the hidden bottles. “One more day… Just one more day…” he mumbled, and you shook your head slightly. 

“For what? Until the next delivery? Isn't what you have enough for you?” 

He looked up at you, his eyes strangely empty, and shook his head. “I need more... I can't go through this without them…” 

Through this? “Sanzu…” 

“What?” he looked at you again, but this time his voice was slightly slurred. 

“I only came to see you in the evening. How many pills did you take before we met?”

He took a moment to think before answering. "More like usual... Although I've actually been taking more lately..." he sighed loudly and leaned his head against the headrest of the seat. “So, I can't tell how much I actually have left.” 

“What?” you looked at him with wide eyes. You felt anxious. “Tell me it's a joke.” 

There was a spark of anger in his eyes, which turned into fear for a split second, only to immediately fade away. He shrugged casually. "I am not joking. I don’t know how many pills I took in total.” 

“How many bottles did you have of that?” you asked, not knowing whether you were more irritated or concerned. 

He started counting on his fingers. His voice was quiet and still slightly slurring, as if his body was starting to demand rest. “Along with the one in your car… I should have 3 full bottles in total…” 

“3 full bottles? How many did you have at the very beginning?” You knew he had a delivery two weeks ago and that he liked to slip pills in various girls' drinks, but you were still afraid of his answer. 

He was thinking for a moment, then looked at you lost in thought. “I bought a full 15 bottles.” 

“And these are the same ones from two weeks ago?” you asked to make sure. Please say yes... 

Sanzu nodded slowly. “I've been going through them like crazy... I couldn't stop…” he patted his pocket. “I still can't…” 

You sighed with relief, despite still feeling anxiety. “So, you didn't take them that often... Damn, you scared me, Sanzu.” 

He looked down at his feet, his expression slowly returned to normal. “I’m sorry... I just can’t stop myself. I feel like if I don’t take them... It feels wrong.” 

“So, they're that good, huh?” you sighed. “I've been watching you these past few days, and I don't think you've ever looked as happy as you did after those pills. Have you tought about putting them into circulation? Do you prefer to keep them just in case, for example to convince more reluctant girls?” 

He looked at you, confused by your words and tone of voice. “I… What?” 

"You know what I mean." you replied without taking your eyes off the road. “I know you treat girls in clubs. Especially the ones you like.” 

His face showed shock and you laughed. “Sanzu, everyone in our immediate circle knows about it. I know you share them with Mikey too.” you shrugged, still slightly amused by Sanzu's expression. “I know that I drink a lot when we go to clubs... in fact, you could say that I'm more drunk than sober most of the time, but I can still tell the difference between fiction and reality. I know what you're doing because I've been involved in it more than once." 

“I... I'm sorry it makes you uncomfortable. It’s just that sometimes I can’t control myself and... “ He stopped himself, as if he didn't know how to finish the sentence. 

“Stop pretending. We know what you are like.” you chuckled as you turned into the neighborhood where Sanzu lived. “You'll propably woud do anything to steal girls from other people when we go to the clubs together.” You pulled into the underground parking lot and parked right next to Sanzu's refurbished car. “Just like a month ago when you gave the pill to the girl that Kokonoi was courting. He was mad at you when you dissapeared into the toilets with her. When I found you after an hour, I didn't know which of you was more fucked up, you or her. 

Sanzu chuckled remembering that situation. “You are right. I did that, but you don't have to make fun of me like this. It was just one time thing!” He said with nervous chuckle, trying to brush off your words as if it wasn't a big deal. 

You patted his thigh, still laughing quietly. “I don't. That situation was hilarious.” 

A smile appeared on the pink-haired man's face. “I'm having flashes. It was funny, but that girl is propably still pissed off at me..." he unbuckled his seat belt and put his hand on the car door. 

You unbuckled your seat belt as well and opened the door on your side. “Oh, she was. Fortunately, she didn’t feel bad enough about it to go to the police.” you gave him a quick glance. “You can be an asshole, but you're often lucky.” You both got out of the car, and you locked the car. “Except maybe that one time, when you gave Ran's new girlfriend the pill. It was a mistake. I haven’t seen a face as beaten up as yours after that action for a long time.” 

He looked away, looking embarrassed for a moment at your words. “I know... I feel so stupid for that.” He sighed quietly and you headed towards the elevator. “But it was fun to see her in pain and misery! It made me happy at the time!” 

You looked at him in silence for a moment before letting out a short laugh. “And that is Sanzu whom I know.” 

He chuckled along with you. “I can't help it... I just like seeing girls suffer.” His eyes lit up and he seemed happy, like he had someone that understood him... Unfortunately, you didn't always understand him completely. 

Sanzu pressed the elevator button and looked up at the floor display. 

“Exactly. Sometimes I wonder why.” you said quietly and Sanzu replied to you in a calm tone. 

“I don’t know either... Maybe it’s because I can be myself with you and no one will judge me? Or maybe it’s just something about girls that drives me crazy.” 

“Oh?”

“Girls are... They're complicated.” Still not looking in your direction, he asked, “You loved her?” Your ex?” 

“I did.” you replied quietly, scratching your head and sighing softly. “But her hypocrisy opened my eyes and now my heart is free again.” 

Even though you only saw the profile of Sanzu's face, you could see there was surprise on it. For a moment he didn't know what to say, or to say anything at all, but when he did speak, his voice was strangely soft and full of understanding. “I see... I'm sorry it didn't work out for you.” 

“What about you? Have you had someone other than Reiko longer?” 

“No. Not really, no." His voice was sad, as if he was feeling bad about himself. You couldn't remember if Sanzu had ever opened up to you like that. “I haven't had the best luck with girls either.” 

The elevator doors opened for you, and you stepped inside. “Hey... some girls went to bed with you without using drugs. Others are simply afraid that they won't be able to cope with your character. I’ve seen the way they look at you more than once. Anyway... if it doesn't work out for you with another girl, maybe look for a guy." you joked, but Sanzu's face turned as red as ever. 

“Y/n!” he said indignantly, and when the elevator doors closed, you chose the floor where his apartment was located. “I'm not that hopeless. Girls love me!... Maybe they don't necessarily know it yet, but...' His bright eyes wandered around the walls of the elevator, and the blush did not leave his cheeks. 

You shrugged and put your hands in your pants pockets. "I joked." You smiled at him, and an idea came to your mind to tease the pink-haired man a bit. You always wanted to see how much you could afford with him... Not necessarily because of how you felt about him... 

You reached your hand towards him and smoothed down the shorter strands of his hair, lightly tracing your fingers around the piercings in his ear. “Follow what makes you happy.” You said quietly, seeing him freeze, staring at the closed elevator door. You thought Sanzu was embarrassed, and you expected him to explode at any moment... but nothing happened. 

When you removed your hand, he slowly turned his head towards you and looked at you from under his long, thick eyelashes. There was something unreadable in his eyes, something you had never seen before, and the tone of his voice made the hairs on the back of your neck stand on end. “You're on very thin ice, L/n. You're lucky I like you, otherwise..." 

“You will be the death of me. I know, Haru.” You smiled slightly and a soft snort escaped Sanzu's lips. “Should I walk you to the door of your apartment? Will you get there alone?” You asked in a calm tone, looking into Sanzu's eyes. Their expressions didn't change, although you could have sworn his eyes dropped to your lips for a split second. 

“I'll go alone.” He replied by turning his head, and when the elevator stopped, he got out and walked down the hall towards his doors. “Come pick me up later, Y/n.” 

You watched his retreating figure and smiled slightly to yourself. “Of course, boss. Sweet dreams."

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