#we could have had sweet lesbian love but i still have that one clip of unoana with her hair down and isane joining her

[deadcool14]

SPOILERS!!!!!

SPOILERS!!!!!

SPOILERS!!!!!

SPOILERS!!!!!

I wanna talk about this show (btw pls watch it, it's so fucking good, the characters are peak and the animation is fucking amazing!):

Episode 1:

-I can't believe they foreshadowed the final boss with fucking Sonic trivia

-Ngl if I asked out a girl and she didn't know anything about neither Sonic or X-Men, I'm dipping the first chance I get

-I was wondering why Scott had the star t-shirt at the beginning, since he only got that at the finale battle with Gideon, to signify his love for Ramona, but with the added context it's not supposed to matter, it's there because it's his most recognizable look

-Matthew's entrance doesn't have the same umph as the movie's. His actor really went all out in that scene, XD

-Sucks that Scott wasn't very involved in this, since he is the title character, but I still loved everything about this. Hope we get to see his arc in the next season

Episode 2:

-Why is Ramona dyeing her hair so damn satisfying?

-Edit: The fact that STEPHEN of all people was the one that gave Scott a euology and was the only one that actually gave a damn XD

And it's pretty sweet that he would have been ok to find out if they sucked, if they found out they sucked together

-"Mommy!" yeah

-I can fucking believe she actually sang that fucking song XD

-Brie Larston is so talented; if I didn't already know she played Envy, I honestly could not tell that was her, but then again I only know her as Captain Marvel, where she has a deeper and much cooler voice

-So, if in the Scott Pilgrim world people just re-spawn at home after being defeated, does that mean that there no one can be murdered or manslaughtered? And if so, how do people actually get a "permanent game over"? Does everyone just die of old age? Also if people bury the coins dropped after someone dies, would that make grave-robbing the most common crime in the world?

-The fact that all Matthew needed to defeat Gideon was confidence is actually very inspiring. The probable reason why he's so extra (besides being a theater kid) is because Ramona dumped him, which really hurt his self-esteem. And while it's kinda sad and pathetic to let a middle school break-up bring down your self-worth, that doesn't mean it didn't suck for Matthew; and after realizing that Ramona wouldn't take him back just because he beat Scott, he finally got a reality check and decided that their goal was pointless, so he moved on from Ramona and decided to make something out of himself, and using the confidence he got from "beating" Scott, he unleashed his true power and was able to defeat Gideon, take his company, and then became successful Broadway actor

-"Et tu, eat me." Roxie is a fucking queen

Episode 3:

-Hey, I didn't asked to be fucking attacked about my writting process, Scott Pilgrim!

-Knives getting more character development besides being obsessed with Scott is everything I didn't know I ever wanted

-I feel you Stephen, I do 😞

-Omg I ship Knives and Kim so much!

-Since Roxie predates Toga, then should be saying that Toga gives off Roxie vibes?

-I'm in lesbians with all of them

-Roxie is so fucking horny lol. Tho I can't blame her, I would go rent to that video store everyday to talk to Kim or Hollie... and immediately choke and explode before a word comes out my mouth

-Also, fun fact: Hollie looks like a milf, but she's actually 26!

-Nice of that lady to apologize to Robot-01. He doesn't deserve all the mistreatment he gets, he's a good boi

Episode 4:

-Holy fuck this animation

-Bro, what is that song? XD

-'Edgar Wrong' XD XD XD

-Young Neil is a fucking treasure

💚 :3

-Straight Wallace is an anomaly that should not be allowed to exist

-Notorious heterosexual

-People are 100% saying some bullshit like, Lucas is only going out with her because he's secretly a pedo is only likes her because she's PLAYING a 17-year-old and that feeds his fetish

-Already saw a meme of the "My God!" clip, keep those coming people!

-Holy fuck this animation!!

-The paparazzi looking like cockroaches, nice

-I feel really bad for Lucas, he's actually a nice guy

-And then he fucking yeets a kid and steals his skateboard XD

-"Watch out guys, Vegan comin' through!"

Episode 5:

-I feel a little bad for Todd, but it's also so satisfying seeing this jackass, who thinks he can get away with anything because he's a rock star, get wrecked

-Weird the Vegan Police didn't show up to take away his powers tho; maybe they were informed of the situation and decided to give him a pass this time.

I really hope they expand on the whole concept of being Vegan in season 2

-Edit:

Envy: Hey, ask them what it feels like to always get his sloppy seconds?

Ramona: How does it feel-?

-I love how they expanded on the Stephen & Knives friendship :3

-I did not recognize Simon Pegg and Nick Frost until the end where they had the cornettos XD

Episode 6:

-Honestly, surprised they didn't bring up that Julie had a crush on Scott, and that's why she's always a bitch to him, specially because this is an anime, they can actually call her a tsundere!

And while we're on that, anyone think it's weird that nearly single girl in the comic had or still has a crush on Scott? Like, seriously? This asshole, really? And you just know that if it was a manga made in Japan, Stacie would have a goddamn bro-con complex with him

-Idk how I feel about them just glossing over Gideon just being an absolute monster; like yeah, Ramona was a bitch with most of her relationships and she does tend to run away from her problems, but Gideon was a manipulative, ego-centric, abusive piece of shit. I mean, the guy kept his 6 ex-girlfriends frozen in stasis for appearences or for whatever else he wanted, and he wanted to do the same to Ramona. I like him and Julie being assholes together, but seriously, I hope they touch on that in season 2

-Dude fuck those kids, I would give Gordon so much respect for actually trying that; I wish I had a third of his confidence

-I never knew I needed to see Captain America and The Spot being goofy friends until now

-I headcanon that one of the reasons why they had Matthew take over Gideon's company was so they could finally give him a job XD, tho it was always insinuated that he was in the army, because of the Private Rank patch on his jacket, which they removed in this version and that really sucka because I liked that little detail; it was also another reference to him being the 1st Evil Ex, because Private is the 1st rank in the military

-At least Ramona does recognize that what she did was messed up, even if the Twins were also being dicks, she should have just called them both out and be done with them

-Those fucking Vegan Robots man, I swear to God

Episode 7:

-When Old Scott spoke, I thought it was Ben Schwartz at first lol

-I love how the world isn't the cliché "terrible post apocalyptic world caused by something that happened to the main character", it just looks really crappy, which... yeah, accurate; the look everyone has just seems to be the current fad, they just embraced the post-apocalyptic looking world they live in.

Also that tech is not that advanced, they have hover vehicles and board, and holo-phones, that does seem like they kind of tech we could have in a few decades, maybe

-The fucking Virtual Boy XD XD XD, surprised Scott's eyes weren't on fire after staring into that thing

-Old Wallace is a fucking GILF

-That lucky motherfucker! He probably got the Switch for free!! 😬😬😬

-Nice Death Stranding reference

-Ramona changing her hair color every week was symbolic of her always running away from her problems, but I like that she keeps doing it in the future, just because she likes it

-Of course Future Ramona has fucking Back To The Future roller blades XD

-Both Ramonas are the same fucking size XD

-At first it felt that they just speedran Scott and Knives, but then again Scott probably read a little of Old Young Neil's auto-biography and figured things out. And since Knives wasn't as obsessed with Scott at this point it makes sense that she'd take this a lot better, Kim and Stephen probably helped her out too

-But at least she catharsis by seeing Scott and Ramona not being able to kiss XD

-Oh! And I just realized that she didn't waste her first kiss on Scott! 😃

Good for her!!

Episode 8:

-I think it's dumb they gave Knives her look from the comics without any reason. She only changed her look to look more appealing to Scott in the comics, and in the epilogue she's back to her normal look, like, at least have people mention the look and her saying that she's trying something new

Edit: I rewatched the whole thing and I just realized that Even Older Scott punched the highlights out of Knives' hair XD

-It's basically a meme at this point, but pls have the Katayanagi Twins do something! They had such a bigger role in the comics. At least I wanted to see their combo moves animated!

It's nice that the Exes are actually cheering for them to kiss, or maybe they're just teasing because they can't; either way it's nice

-Even Older Scott is Ramona's 8th evil ex. He debuts in the 8th episode and has studied the powers of all the other 7 Evil Exes along with his own, which adds up to 8.

Sucks he didn't actually use their powers, I would have loved it if he used Vegan Powers combined with mystical powers, maybe instead of Demon Hipster Chicks he summons little Nega Scotts, he has stronger skateboard tricks than Lucas, he some robot arms that can shoot lasers and can help him do the Twins' combo moves, but doubled

-Edit: The fact that Knives went for Ramona instead of Scott. CHARACTER DEVELOPMENT!!!!

-Even Older (Nega) Scott is just Evil Ryu and I fucking love it!!

-Even Older Scott's color scheme not only signifyes just how jaded and lost he's become, but also that Nega Scott has completely taken him over is just *chef's kiss*

-Edit: Todd still has the Wallace tattoo XD also his was my favorite attack, he just teleports and slams down, simple, but awesome

Also Even Older Scott defeated him with a headbutt

-Edit: It would've been funny if he had also punched Roxie in the boob again

-Every future character has "Old" in their name, but Ramona is just "Future Ramona", she will cut you if you call her old. Real missed opportunity to not call the oldest Ramona "Future Future Ramona".

"MILF" and "GILF Ramona" also would have been acceptable

-Sex Bob-Bomb became the new Crash and the Boys, except that instead of having an 8-year-old, they have a 17-year-old.

And Scott now has his actual girlfriend watching him perform

-Looks like Ramona actually enjoyed the stunt double gig. Good for her, tho honestly, she should have stuck with Netflix, Idk why, but I feel like they're gonna blow up at somepoint

-I like the idea of Lucas x Kim, but I would still prefer Knives x Kim, and my personal made-up ship: Lucas x Stacie. I just love big bois with cute smol gfs

-At first, it didn't make sense to see Todd and Roxie hanging out, but then I realized that just like Roxie, Todd was hurt by someone who treated their relationship like an un-important after-thought, a phase; and just broke it up like it was nothing, without any consideration for the other's feelings. And now that Roxie got closure with Ramona she's helping him to move on from this in a way healthier way than she did. (That and they're both gay) That is so fucking wholesome, I need to see them being friends in season 2 pls!! Also sucks she didn't interact much with Matthew, because Satya Bhabha said that he thinks Matthew and Roxie would be friends.

Also this was kinda foreshadowed in episode 2, at the end of Matthew and Gideon's fight, where she mentions wanting to get Vegan Powers after seeing how convinient they are. I need Half-Ninja, Vegan, Lesbian, now!!!!

-Wallace: Holy shit! True love does exist!?

-Ramona is finally gonna stop running away, so she keeps most of her hair as her natural color with a little green at the end to not forget her past and where she came from

-Get wait to see what Goose's game, but it must be in pretty early development, probably untitled even

SEASON 2 PLSSSSSS!!!!

[booasaur]

You have me more than intrigued me. Do you know if anyone is posting Della Street scenes from Perry Mason? I gave up on HBO awhile ago but I may have to reup if this one proves engrossing enough. How procedural is the show on the whole? I love a good period mystery.

I couldn't find any scenes, of Della herself or of the ship(s). It's especially hard to find stuff about just the HBO series when the original was so iconic.

The show as a whole is....the first season started off as the most stereotypical cliched version of modern reboots as you could find, a dark, grim slow origin story where the thing the character is known for only happens near the end.

I'm not sure how much you know about the original series, well, we'll put aside the books, but the actual first show started airing all the way back in the '50s and it was really popular, and Della Street was a badass even then The show ended a few years later but was so popular, the same actors came back for a series of TV movies that basically acted liked more episodes, all the way from 1985 to 1995. So I guess the modern era isn't the only one doing these reboots. :P

But anyway, the original show was more of a classic procedural, each ep would have Perry, a defense lawyer, defending a client and figuring out a way to prove their innocence and get them off. The new HBO series has had one case a season so far, and there's no real guarantee that Perry'll be able to successfully defend their case, the tone is more cynical.

It is a pure mystery per season, though, as much as it may look like it's more a character introspection. It's a lot more realistic in terms of racism, sexism, and of course, with the changing of Della to a lesbian, homophobia. Perry himself is suffering PTSD after the war, he starts off as a private investigator so we see how it comes to happen that he becomes a lawyer.

Della's too main a character to do all her individual scenes, but I'd actually uploaded some of these short scenes for my friend (who then went back to watch the whole show herself) but maybe this will give you a good idea of what the show's about:

Season 1

1x01 - Della's first appearance: https://streamable.com/idap23

1x03 - This is when I first started to really like Della: https://streamable.com/pys6gf

1x03 - Again, being so awesome, I literally made a clip of this back when this first aired and made my friend watch, who forgot about the show again till this season: https://streamable.com/ezhcsu

1x04 - The first time we find out Della's into women, with her gf Hazel: https://streamable.com/uvzwpx

1x05 - Another sweet scene with Hazel: https://streamable.com/qi83ft

1x07 - Della with her friend Hamilton: https://streamable.com/dm6ezq

I didn't do every scene where Hazel was mentioned or appeared, though there's not much more.

And now in season 2:

2x01 - Della first sees Anita: https://streamable.com/yyttvi

2x01 - An extension of the scene above: https://streamable.com/lli2b1

2x01 - Della gives Anita a call: https://streamable.com/6b2enu

2x02 - Anita takes Della to a boxing match: https://streamable.com/7jm5mt

These last clips are the ones I used to make gifs from so they're not necessarily the full scenes. There are also obviously so many more scenes of Della in all, so if this does pique your interest, I'd go ahead and just watch the whole show, at least from season 2 onward. It's gotta be available to watch in places you don't have to pay. >_>

2x03 - Anita visits Della at the office: https://streamable.com/rl6870

2x04 - Della's still upset about their previous client's suicide, she meets up wiith Anita and they go on a trip: https://streamable.com/siiaw4

2x04 - Della waking up https://streamable.com/vws9kw

2x05 - Anita and Della's scenes this ep https://streamable.com/brv422

2x06 - A bit of Anita and a lot more Della individually, just figured it'd add more depth:

- Part 1: https://streamable.com/nur5ht

- Part 2: https://streamable.com/4h6m7p

2x07 - No Anita this week, but we did get a scene with Ham https://streamable.com/2x3xvv

2x08 - Not much Anita this week either, but a lot of good scenes of Della

- Part 1: https://streamable.com/csgm23

- Part 2: https://streamable.com/tu8h33

[fear-and-delight-l]

GENDERSWAPPED!LOSERS

HERE WE GO 

JILLIAN DENBROUGH 

-Jill is very avid about getting her sister, Georgia back. Well, at least the killer anyways. 

-Jill has never finished any of her writing, until she is an adult. 

-aRTiSt??

-Jill gives hugs hugs hugs!!!

-everyone wants her hugs. 

-ok, Jill is very sexually confused. Bradley Marsh is good looking...but so is McKenna Hanlon with her pink lipstick and her always good looking pigtails....then there is Sarah Uris, who is so cute with her blonde/brown curls and her little cheerleading outfit. 

-suffers from stuttering simp disorder 

-simp simp simp

-simp? Yes. 

-ok but I think she would like Plastic Hearts by Miley Cyrus lmao

-FLANNEL GODDESS!!! Has flannels in so many colors. 

-”R-R-Riley, stop m-making fun of m-my j-j-jorts.” 

-oh yeah. She is rocking the jean shorts. They either go to around her knees or near the middle of her thighs. 

-shoulder length brown hair. Screams bisexual. 

RILEY TOZIER

-just gonna put this out there, take it as you will, but her glasses make her look like a fish. Her eyes are HUGE 

-goddess or (what is a non-binary god? Godthem?) of dad jokes. But not the corny kind. The kind of dad jokes that include sleeping with him and “riding him like a horse.” 

-”so not fucking funny.” -Edith Kaspbrak, who’s dad isn’t even present in her life.  -yeah, bisexual.  -sexual for Edith Kaspbrak.  -And Sarah Uris

-And Bradley Marsh

-and Jill Denbrough 

-and Brenna Hanscom

-and Patrick Hockstetter (she regrets this. But when Patrick isn’t chasing her with Bowers and Criss and Huggins, she likes to notice that Patrick is definitely good looking)

-crazy wavy hair. Seriously, she wears it in a pixie cut, and it is CRAZY. But she help Bradley cut away his mullet. 

-the friendship dynamic between Riley Tozier and Bradley Marsh is UNSTOPPABLE!

-plays softball with Jill. She is pitcher, and damn is she good. (Jill plays third base, for reference)

-the girls on the softball team sort of like her, sort of not. She’s a loser, and they don’t like her because everyone thinks she’s queer.  -still a trash mouth 

-still a smartass 

-Rildeth? Edithley? Redith?

BRADLEY MARSH

-all right, here we go. 

-POWER BISEXUAL

-He came out to Riley, and Riley came out to him. 

-daddy issues  

-daddy issues

-daddy issues

-anyways, Bradley had a mullet that his dad made him wear, and when Riley helped him cut it....freedom!

-when he and the other losers are going to the quarry, he likes to help McKenna pick flowers so Sarah will have some to turn into flower crowns  

-is totally charmed by Jill  Denbrough. He is a simp for how charming she is. Bravery, art...

-Bradley also likes to draw. 

-Brenna may be totally smitten with him....

-Bradley is the same age as all the other losers, but the losers all see him as older. 

-hates his father, feels weak around him. 

-he and Riley often share cigarettes. (I love the friendship dynamic here.)

-Bradley has little freckles, and when he and Brenna get together as adults, Brenna likes to kiss all of them. 

-Bradley loves to hang with Sarah, and she is such a sweetie. She gets annoyed, but when she is around Bradley, she is calm. 

-Bradley likes to put his arm around Sarah, ALWAYS

-I’m in love

SARAH URIS 

-WE LOVE OUR JEWISH CHEERLEADER LESBIAN

-yes, Sarah Uris is cheer captain. The other cheerleaders are skeptical of her, but treat her ok nonetheless. 

-Sarah Uris is a softie who will tell you to fuck off. 

-bridwatcher. Sarah loves her birds. She likes to sit with Jill. Jill draws birds while Sarah quietly talk about the birds. 

-Brenna loves to play with her curls, braiding them and doing fun styles with them with the help from McKenna. 

-sundresses one day, shorts and a shirt the next. 

-her hair is so nice! Think...classic curls. Google for reference. 

-the cheerleaders don’t go to track meets or softball games. So, since Brenna and Edith are both in track and Jill and Riley are softball players, she goes in her own cheerleading outfit, and even snags one for McKenna, (who isn’t a cheerleader.) and they both cheer at track and softball. 

-must I remind you that Jill is a simp for BOTH OF THEM. AND BRADLEY?? HE CHEERS THEM ON TOO.

-one time Bradley actually got into a cheerleading skirt??!!

-anyways, back to Sarah.  -she loves to give everyone kisses before leaving. Here’s how she gives them:

Jill: cheek kiss, runs a hand through her hair.  Edith: takes Edith’s face in her hands and kisses her nose. Edith sometimes backs up a little when she feels a little panicky about germs, but always accepts Sarah’s kiss.  Bradley: forehead. She ruffles his hair, and sometimes, Bradley kisses her chin as she is kissing his forehead.  McKenna: near her lips. Like, the corner of her mouth. 🥺 Brenna: cheek kiss. She holds brenna’s chin while kissing her.  Riley: straight on the lips. Or the forehead if you song ship stozier. -ok, I am a huge fan of Sarah+Riley....but then there is Edith. Poly??? Possibly 

-anyways, Sarah loves to make flower crowns and put them in bradley’s hair. 

-she and Brenna are very close. If Sarah isn’t next to Bradley, or has Riley’s arm around her shoulders, she is with Brenna, either holding her hand or showing her stuff about plants or birds. She gives Brenna constant praise about the barrens 

-very grumpy a lot.

BRENNA HANSCOM

ok, Brenna is straight. I didn’t change that.  -Brenna thinks constructively, and is a visual learner. Constantly thinks about the future. 

-ok, she is so so so sweet. Likes to wear this cute pink skirt, but only around the losers. 

-POETRY

-She loves to read and wrote poetry. It’s so cute I just can’t aaaah-

-ok, so she’s on the track team. Edith convinces her in 10th grade. 

-HAIR CLIPS! she has them in her hair, and tons extra in her backpack. 

-Bradley loves it when Brenna plays with his hair and puts clips in it. 

-she and Bradley are very good friends. 

-she may be straight, but isn’t uncomfortable when Sarah holds her hand or Riley talks about her gay situation or when Jill tells her she’s pretty. She just isn’t gay but she loves and supports her gay friends. She even kissed McKenna in a game of spin the bottle

-poor baby has body insecurities...

-ugh, she hates Henry Bowers. But she loves ice cream! She likes vanilla because it’s sweet and plain. 

-when they have sleepovers, everyone always has a disc of New Kids on the Block to play for her (AAA!)

-Riley literally swore to protect her. Even though Riley’s sarcasm can be demeaning, she trusts her. 

-Brenna Hanscom, a sweetie that will fight for you.

McKenna Hanlon, the badass vegan who definitely has WAP. 

-ok, I didn’t change her race, she is still black. 

-McKenna is a sign of hope. Everyone feels so uplifted around her. 

-she has this signature pink lipstick she wears everyday the Greta Bowie makes fun of, but she still wears it. 

-she loves bubblegum. McKenna has it ALL THE TIME. 

-inspiration? Yes. She is a goddess. 

-ok, she is so nice, but that gun she has? Pennywise doesn’t stand a chance. McKenna is a fighter. 

-McKenna has these cute little pig tails that she wears with purple ribbons. Jill loves to listen to her talk. 

-definitely the least insane of all the losers, but girl knows how to have fun!

-not a huge smoker, but occasionally will share one with Bradley. 

-the friendship between McKenna and Bradley is impeccable. They are a badass duo. 

-I don’t know what her sexuality is. She definitely doesn’t. Although she and Jill got caught making out in a closet. They said it was no strings attached....suspicious.

-she is indeed vegan. She just has a special love for animals and can’t bring herself to eat them. She isn’t protesting everyone to go vegan, she just eats how she wants. She occasionally slips and goes for ice cream though😉

-at the rock war, after she recovered a little from Bowers, SHE BEAT HIS ASS!

-my queen, gosh I love her!

-she is so much fun to be around. One time, in the barrens, she installed a swing so she could sit in somethin because Riley and Edith and Sarah are always in the hammock together. (It’s bound to break). 

-need a therapist? She’s ya girl. 

EDITH!!

-ok, so this looks very soft girl, but Edith is fiery!  -her mom makes her worry a lot about disease and what not, but her anxiety about what her mom may do is worse. 

-seriously, she is scared of her mother. She doesn’t even know if her sickness are real. 

-anyways, don’t fuck with her. She will bite you. 

-no seriously, she will bite you. One time in a fight with Hockstetter, she bit him. She was worried she might have gotten something in her mouth, but Sarah calmed her down.  -she may bicker with Riley, but really, she loves her. Her and her stupid glasses, 

-anyways, she is a sweetie. She runs track, but as long as Riley is waiting on the sidelines with her inhaler at the end, she is alright. 

-someone give this girl a hug. 

-internalized homophobia towards herself. 

-she and Bradley are good, they just aren’t as close. Edith is closest with Jill. 

-Edith looks up to Jill, big time. 

-Edith hates her mom very very much. 

-she wears cute little tops with shorts or skirts. Occasionally she will wear overalls. 

-fuck greta Bowie campaign? Yeah, Edith started it.

-Fanny pack! She has an extra pair of glasses for Riley, Bobby pins for Sarah, an extra pen or pencil for Jill, a mini stick of Bradley’ favorite deodorant, hair clips for Brenna, and McKenna’s favorite bubblegum. 

-Riley calls her Eds. She hates it because it sounds like a boy name. She hates it even more when Riley calls her Eddie. 

-kisses tears away. Crying? She will kiss your cheeks and wipe those tears away. She did that when Brenna got cut by Bowers. 

-inhaler? Yes. It’s her little beacon of safety. 

-ice cream and comic books with Riley, bird watching and flower crowns with Sarah are her favorites! 

-doesn’t know her sexual preference, she’s just not straight. 

-butterflies always land on her when she’s outside. One landed on her nose once and Riley and Sarah started rock-paper-scissoring for who got her. (That was long forgotten since Riley is a sore loser.)

-my baby has long hair is very slight waves. It goes down to her breasts. 

-likes to wear Jill’s Flannels. 

-OK SHE IS SO CUTE IN A PAIR OF BAGGY JEANS AND A TANK TOP, WEARING SOMEONE’S JACKET OMG

-Edith is cold? Never. She always has someone’s something, whether it’s McKenna’s iconic leather jacket or Jill’s flannels

................................................................................................................................

Ok! Those are my headcanons. Feel free to repost, I don’t give a damn. If you want drawings or more headcanons of them, I am always open. I had this posted on my old account but that got taken down....I was previously coffeeandweasleys

@im-a-rocketman​, @nate-isnt-great​ @imreddieimreddieimreddie​ @ur-not-reddie​

[hawksky]

Yuta Okkotsu | No One Believes You

A/N: it is so hard to write this man as funny but i have prevailed, his sweetness will not beat me. also I know no one asks for Yuta but here I am trying to force Yuta simping onto myself and all of you. Fluff & Humour

Prompt:  Yuta spills on you ( @megumifushi)/ people think you’re cheating on Yuta.

CW: mentions of sex (nothing explicit), alcohol consumption, mentions of cheating but y/n and Yuta know there is no cheating.

Maybe it was the candlelight. Maybe it was the home cooked meal. Most likely? It was nursing your third glass of wine that had you in a warm daze, unable to move your starry eyes from the dark-haired man sitting adjacent to you. It was far from your first date, you should have been over all the romance, but there was something about being in each other’s presence that made you both feel like nervous teenagers.

Flustered under the intensity of your gaze Yuta forced himself to look away, the flush on his cheeks growing darker with each passing moment. He desperately grasps for the jug of water across the table and it’s then that you both feel the effect of that third glass loosening your limbs. His elbow clipping the bottle of cabernet sauvignon, you watch helpless to react, as the remaining red liquid spills onto your chest.

 A bright red stain now adorned your white sundress, but you couldn’t find it in yourself to be mad, unable to suppress your own giggles looking at the mess. You look up to find Yuta hovering over you nervously with a wet towel starting to blot the stain over your chest.

 You lean back, basking in the attention, entirely unconcerned about the mess (if you can’t get the stain out in the wash it wouldn’t be hard to replace the dress), and returning your gaze to your doting boyfriend. It was hard not to feel loved by him in every action he took, even something as small as rushing to attempt to clean an impossible stain.

 When his eyes met yours, it was like he exited whatever fugue state his was in, realization dawning on him that he was touching your boob. He jumped back in horror, immediately apologizing profusely for crossing boundaries.

 It was true, you and Yuta had yet to be physically intimate, but you were far rejecting his touch, you followed his lead in everything and it seemed at this point he was waiting for you to take the next step.

 You giggle softly at his overreaction “Babe, it’s okay, we’re dating you’re allowed to touch me as much as you want. Wherever you want. However you want.”

 With that permission finally vocalized to him, you had no idea what you had just released. _

You forgot.

You forgot the exact events of last night.

You forgot you agreed to spar with Maki and Nobara today.

 In a rush you haphazardly pulled on a pair of yoga shorts and a crop top, hopping around as you pulled on your shoes, too distracted to feel the pain in your legs.

 You arrived waving your hand eagerly, resting your hands on your knees once you reached the girls trying to catch your breath. When you finally glance up, surprised by the lack of comments on your lateness, you’re met with Maki’s judging glare and Nobara’s jaw hanging. “What? I’m sorry I’m late but I swear I was only 10 minutes delayed we still have plenty of time”

 They exchange glances and a silent conversation before Maki speaks up in an even cold tone.

 “Y/N, did you and Yuta break up or are you cheating on him?”

 You’re taken aback, of all the things you were not expecting that.

 “Wha-? Why are those the only two options? No neither, why would you even think that?”

 “Uh, the rope burns and bruises all over your body would be why we think that. Who the fuck did that to you?” Nobara replied as her eyes scrutinized your body, cataloguing each exposed mark.

 You had to glance down at your own body, trying to process Nobara’s description. Your face became inflamed, you had forgotten, but as you glance at each mark and bruise over your body, you remember. The memories of last night, hazy as they are, come flooding back. As you take full stock of the state of your body, you want to berate yourself for wearing such revealing clothing, although you’re unsure if you have any clothes capable of concealing this amount of damage.

 You scratch your head, cringing and avoiding their eyes “No, no cheating or break up, this is uhm Yuta’s work”

 “Fucking bullshit, Yuta? We’ve known him for years; this is not him.”

 “He really loves you yknow? I can’t believe you of all people would do this, it’s so fucking shitty”

 You finally meet their eyes, bewildered by their statements “I swear on my life, I’m not lying”

 A pause. Another silent conversation between the two women ensues, before they slung their arms over your shoulder with a devious “oh you’re telling us EVERYTHING”

__

 It had to be Gojo. It had to be fucking Gojo who saw you first. He looked frantically between you down on the field, and Yuta who was walking alongside him across campus. For the first time in his life, he felt like his eyes must have been failing them

 Yuta cocked his head, confused by Gojo’s unusual behaviour – well unusual for Gojo standards. Following his stare to see you with Nobara and Maki flanking either of your sides, seeming far too gleeful and unproductive for what was supposed to be a training session.

 Gojo reaffixed his attentions to Yuta, “You’re okay with that?”

Yuta laughed at his former sensei “I know you don’t have experience with relationships, but I don’t feel threatened by a lesbian couple around my girlfriend”

 “You don’t see all the bruises obviously left by another all over y/n?” “Obviously?” “That’s the part you focused on? Yuta-chan, don’t you worry I’ll find you someone else, tonight even I know the perfect place my girls will eat you up” Yuta weighed his options in response, he knew he could clear the air easily, but it wasn’t often a person got to be the one fucking with Gojo instead of the other way around.

 “Ah I really don’t think that’ll be necessary, me and y/n will heal up no problem”

 “Yuta, I don’t say this about many people, but you deserve a true real love, one that would never cheat on you” Gojo’s voice dripping with a rare bout of sincerity. “I know what I deserve you’re right”  

 “…So you’re coming out with me tonight then? We’ll have a real boys night” “No, me and y/n are going to a movie tonight and it’s my turn to pick I can’t cancel or else I forfeit my pick”

 Gojo took a long pause, Yuta’s usual sheepish grin had been replaced with one that looked almost devious. He couldn’t help but feel like he was missing something, there was some connection he had not been able to make, this was an unusual feeling for him.

 Gojo gasps suddenly, staring wide eyed at his darling former pupil “You didn’t ­— !” Despite the inevitability, Yuta still blushed heavily at Gojo’s revelation “I would never kiss and tell but… I am absolutely certain I have not been cheated on”

 “Ah ha ha, the pupil becomes the master, huh?” Gojo chides digging his elbow into Yuta’s ribs. “Sensei I assure you I have followed in none of your footsteps” 

Paging (send a msg to be added): @sandyscastle​ @nokkusu​

[random-imagines-blog]

Promise Me Part 2 {Reggie Mantle x Reader}

Requested by: Anonymous Wordcount: 2244 Summary: Some people aren’t taking the kindest to your budding relationship. Sequel to Promise Me, Part 1 Found Here (X)

The only thing better than hanging out with Reggie at school was the reactions from the other students. Especially your ex boyfriend Sweet Pea. Karma came around and knocked him off of his ass, just as you were hoping. Her summer fling, Josie, had dumped him for Archie Andrews, just the way that he had dumped you for her. A petty side of you was happy about that. He deserved it. He got to be grumpy around the halls of Riverdale High while you walked around with Reggie following you like some kind of lovesick puppy. After you had taken him out for his birthday, showed him a good time with a bunch of drag Queens and sugary alcohol-free drinks, he’d taken to you even more. Didn’t even complain when he had to ride bitch on the back of your motorcycle back to your snug little town.

“Are you ready for the test today?” Reggie asked, somewhat sarcastically. You had been blowing him off lately to study for this exam. You really needed to do well on it to pass this class, since you had been just cruising through it instead of trying. It was now or never.

You took your study notes out of your pocket, where they had been crumpled up for a couple of hours, and slammed them down on the cafeteria table. “You have no idea how ready I am, Mantle.” You said with a smirk. You flattered out the pieces of paper and went right back to studying them while Reggie sat beside you and made sure that your hair didn’t get into your food. You were eating without paying attention, and if he hadn’t stepped in, you probably would have eaten a lock or two. You were appreciative of it, but never knew how to show that sort of thing.

You never thought that this would have worked out. Reggie, with his range of emotions - most of them fueled by negativity, like jealousy and arrogance but once in a while, he showed you something nice. Meanwhile, your brother Jughead had once complained that you had the emotional range of a knife. But yet there was something between you two. Something more than you had ever felt with Sweet Pea. This in no way felt like a relationship out of convenience.

“When you pass, I’ll take you out to Pop’s, we’ll get milkshakes,” Reggie said, clipping your hair back for the upteenth time.

“Yay, another milkshake,” You said, deadpan as always. “We always go for  milkshakes, Reg, I think that this deserves something a little more special. What about our secret place?”

“What, you showed him your stupid secret place?”A voice came from behind you. You didn’t have to turn around to know that it was Sweet Pea. Now that he didn’t have Josie to focus on, his attention had been on you again. Love notes, flowers, trying to sit next to you in class. You had told him to fuck off so many times, it might as well have become your catchphrase. But there he was, always there, right out of the corner of your eye, listening to everything that you were saying. “I’ve known you forever and you never took me there.”

“Guess you just weren’t special enough,” You said with a shrug. You got to your feet, shoved your notes back into your pocket and smiled rarely at Reggie. “Come on, walk to me class.”

“Yes ma’am,” Reggie said with a smirk, getting to his feet. He purposefully pushed past your ex boyfriend as he followed behind you, neither of you looking back. The Serpent wasn’t worth it. That was something you had come to learn and fully believed.

-

You wore the top that your mother had gotten you and sent in the mail. It was plain, but flowy, and didn’t have the leather look that you had come to be known for. All black t-shirts and jackets, comfortable things. But this was a special night - even to the point where you were allowing Reggie to pick you up in his car. This shirt was a dark purple color, not quite black, but still enough to where you felt yourself while wearing it.

There was a honking noise outside the trailer. You still had never let  him come inside. You weren’t ashamed of the little home that you shared with your dad and your brother, but you also didn’t want to see the look of distaste that Reggie would no doubt have on his face.

With a last glimpse in the mirror, strange how feminine you looked today, you left the trailer and walked over to the car that didn’t look like it belonged in this neighborhood at all. It was too nice. And too clean. People were no doubt peeking out their windows to see who were there and who they were there for. With your usual level of confidence, you strode to the car and got inside, only to be greeted by a huge smile and an arm around your hug from Reggie Mantle. “ONE HUNDRED BABY!”

Yes, you had gotten a hundred percent on your test. That was the main reason why you were letting Reggie drive. Because you were so damn excited, that you might try to bribe one of the bartenders to put a shot into your drink. No one really messed with the gay bar, so cops were unlikely to show up. It was hard to ID people when they were dressed as the opposite gender, anyhow. “It’s not that big of a deal,” You said, shrugging his arm off and put on the seatbelt. What an unfamiliar feeling. You spent more time on bikes than you ever did in cars, and those did not come with seatbelts.

“You’re allowed to be happy and excited for things you know,” He said, his smile slightly faltering. “It’s just us. And I’ve seen you happy before.”

“It’s just embarrassing,” You muttered, sinking into the seat. “Having ... feelings.”

Reggie took that as a huge compliment, and it helped to boost his ego. “So you have feelings for me, eh?” He asked with a huge grin.

“Oh stop,” You said, rolling your eyes. “Is it such a surprise that beneath this hard exterior is just soft, pink flesh? I am still human, after all.”

“A bit,” Reggie said with a shrug, focusing his eyes on the row as he tried to find his way out of the trailer park. The streets were thin and like a maze. “You just hide them so well, it’s hard to tell you have any.”

“I wouldn’t be hanging out with you if I didn’t, you dolt.” You sunk into the comfortable leather seats of the car, letting yourself relax now that you were leaving the park. You still had to give him directions to the gay bar, but he was getting the hang of the journey. “People just suck. They break down your walls, just to hurt you so you have to build them back up and stronger. I don’t like being vulnerable.”

“People are assholes,” Reggie agreed, thinking of his on again off again thing with Veronica. He hadn’t thought much about it since you had come into his life, actually.

Rather than get into more conversations about emotions, you turned up the music and rolled down the window, sticking your head out. “Fuck standardized testing!” You yelled out as you drove past the school. Reggie laughed at that, wondering how you could go from steady as a rock to being this free and liberated within a matter of seconds. He’d never met anyone like you before. Never met anyone who truly did not give a fuck about what other people thought of them.

The bar was busy tonight. Friday nights usually were, but there wasn’t a single person there who you recognized from Riverdale. It would be hard for any of them to get in, considering you and Reggie were the only ones that were allowed in under age. Only when you weren’t around the judgmental looks of your peers did you really feel like you could be yourself. You didn’t care what other people said, it was just the fact that they were saying anything that bothered you.

You ordered more of the virgin cocktails that you liked so much, so syrupy sweet. You drained the first one quickly, and felt the sugar remaining in your system. “Dance with me,” You said to Reggie, holding your hand out to him. And he did. He came out onto the dance floor with you and the dressed up Queens and made sure that you had a damn good time.

So good a time that you didn’t notice that there was a familiar face in the crowd. And hand that was connected to the body that was connected to that face had his phone out and was recording video.

-

“Did you hear that they go to gay bars together?”

“I wouldn’t be surprised if y/n was a lesbian. I wouldn’t want to date a guy again if he did what Sweet Pea did-”

“Reggie’s dad is going to kill him.”

“A hidden drag Queen?”

The words followed you and Reggie around the next morning as you met at your locker and he walked you to your class, just as he always did. His jaw was clenched, a vein popping in his forehead. You understood his anger - his dad would really would get pissed off about this sort of thing. You had heard the rumors. And you had seen the bruises that Reggie refused to talk about, but you never pushed the issue.

It was pushing at your own anger issues as well. You didn’t like this sort of attention - why the hell couldn’t Cheryl do something daring to get the attention onto her, the way she liked it? Burn down her house again or something. You’d give her all your money to do that at this point.

The most amazing thing though, was despite all of these looks and the rumors and the jokes, Reggie stood by your side. He picked you up from your first class, and took you to your second. And then he picked you up from there and took you to lunch. His shoulders were more tense than they usually were, and he had started to grind his teeth. Something would have to be done before both of you exploded.

Everyones eyes were on you when you stepped into the cafeteria. Even your brother’s, though they looked hurt - you never even told him about your special place. Sweet Pea, sitting beside Jughead, looked pissed. You stopped before you got in line, and Reggie bumped into you from behind. You turned around to face him, looking up into his dark eyes. You were always astounded by the sharp jawline that he had, and those cheekbones - he was a fuckin’ hunk.

“I’m bisexual, not a lesbian,” You said, loud enough for everyone to hear. “Not that it’s anyone’s fucking business. And if you’re that damn concerned about Reggie, well...”

You had to stand on your tiptoes because he was so tall. You leaned against him, pressing his chest against yours, using him to steady yourself. You wrapped your arms around his neck and brought him in for a kiss that should ease any doubt in anyone’s mind.

There was a pounding sound on the edge of the room that made you startle yourself out of the bliss that Reggie’s lips had blossomed in you. Expecting it to be a teacher, you turned around, only to see Sweet Pea was raging his way towards you, the chair that he was sitting in pushed to the ground. You turned around, straightening your shoulders, ready to get into a fight with your ex-boyfriend if this was how it was going to end up. You weren’t about to let Reggie defend you, that’s not the sort of girl that you were.

“You don’t deserve her, Mantle,” Sweet Pea sneered, his nostrils flaring.

“Neither did you,” Reggie said in return. He put his arm around your waist, and you could hear the smirk in his voice.

“Get over yourself, Sweet Pea,” You said, not liking the way that they were talking as if you weren’t even there. “So what, Kevin Keller takes a video of us dancing and that, for some reason, is all of your business? I’ll be the first to admit that we aren’t as interesting as you seem to think that we are. You really want something to focus on in that video? Learn some style from those Queens, you boring peasants.”

Reggie laughed for the first time that day at your comments. You leaned back against his chest, motioning for him to back up. “Let’s go to Pop’s,” He suggested.

“Anywhere that’s not here,” You said, exchanging his arm for his hand, holding it tight as you left the cafeteria, leaving even more gossip behind you but at least it was about the kiss rather than rumors of you both being gay.

Fuck the high school rumor mill.

[gothpanda]

A Little Bit of Attitude Ch. 37: Vancouver

WORD COUNT: 5.1K 

A/N: haha three ch in under a week? love that for me

TAGS: @madamsixx @nosebleedblitz​

@emariehorror​

WARNINGS: none

Read On Ao3

Previous/Next

February 5th, 1988

Tucson, Arizona

Nikki popped his bubblegum, resting his leg across his other to get comfortable in the dark green armchair. He waited patiently in the therapy office, looking out the wall-to-ceiling window to the Arizona desert. The sound of the door opening made Nikki's head turn, the on-edge feeling turning into a relaxed emotion.

"Sorry I'm late, Nikki. I had run into a colleague for a minute," said the Dr. grabbing his notebook from his desk.

"It's okay, Ortiz. Felt nice to think of what to say before we started," politely said Nikki, spitting his gum out onto a tissue.

"Good. It's always best to think before rambling during an appointment. Gets all the bases," said Dr. Ortiz, sitting down in front of Nikki. He clipped his pen and wrote down the date on his notes for Nikki. "So, how have we been feeling personally?"

"My mood has been good. I haven't tanked and felt depressed. It feels great to say that. I really haven't felt depressed since being here," said Nikki, scoffing at the fact of being healthy working out for him.  

"Well done then. According to my notes here, you had a group therapy session a couple of days ago with a guest? Is that correct?" asked Dr. Ortiz. Nikki nodded. "And how was it seeing a familiar face for the first time since admitting yourself into rehab?"

"I was happy, then I was scared. Scared and happy at the same time. I don't know how anyone can have those feelings together, but I did," said Nikki, rubbing his hands together, Sammi's face popping in his head.

"Why were you scared?" asked Dr. Ortiz, ready to write down what Nikki was about to say.

"Sammi and I didn't leave on the greatest terms in California. When I saw her, I was scared of what she would say about being around me when I was doing heroin,"

"And how did you feel in the end after she expressed her feelings?"

"Sad… I really didn't realize how horrible Sammi felt about everything from the moment I started. It never crossed my mind the conversation we had when we broke up. I don't want to hurt her like that ever again," said Nikki, continuing to rub his hands together.

"While it may have been a terrible feeling to hear to her side of the abuse, it helps make you a better person living a sober life and get rid of the fear,"

"What if I'm still scared of being sober?" asked Nikki, looking down at his feet

"And what is it that you're scared of exactly?"

Nikki sighed, rubbing his hands on his pants. "What if I'm a terrible boyfriend to her being sober? That's what I'm scared about,"

Dr. Ortiz is taken aback but almost lets out a chuckle. "Why would you believe you'd make a terrible boyfriend? You seemed like a great man to her and only her. Even with your troubles from all of our sessions. So why worry when you'd be healthy?"

"Because I've never been with someone I love without some kind of 'help,'" said Nikki, blushing from saying the L-word. "I've always been under the influence even to a small extent with Sammi because I needed it. Without drugs I'm a timid man who wants to be with the smartest girl he ever met," sighed Nikki. "That's why I'm scared,"

Dr. Ortiz takes a second to think before speaking, ready to talk man to man. "Nikki, I'm not going to be speaking in a way of a therapist but how a normal married man would. If Sammi dealt and stuck around long enough when you had your shit, then what makes you think she's not going to love Sober Nikki?" asked Dr. Ortiz, narrowing his eyes at Nikki.

"But she blamed herself for me dying…"

"And that is when you act like a man and treat her like the queen she is to you. Understood?" Nikki only nodded. "Very good. It's going to be a learning curve but hiding isn't going to work out,"

June 3rd, 1988

San Francisco, California

Boxes upon boxes were scattered among the small place that was now Sammi's old apartment, ready to be filled with every single little thing she can take home. Sammi kneeled in front of one labeled 'photos' as Emma and Sabrina were graciously beside her, putting other things in different boxes. Sabrina organized all of Sammi's books while Emma took the time for her snack break.

"Thanks for the help you two, even if Emma's been eating the whole time," said Sammi, smiling over at Emma in the middle.

"Your kitchen is empty for your information thanks to me so you're welcome," said Emma with a mouth full of banana, Sabrina shaking her head playfully.

"Why thank you, Emma. Is it still hard to believe I'm finally done with school? No more having to deal with grades,"

"Tell me about it. I'm starting to miss it already and I'm only taking a year off," said Sabrina, reading the back of one book.

"Yeah yeah we get it. You two are done with college while my ass is still going to classes," said Emma, pouting.

"Awe you'll be fine," said Sabrina, pinching Emma's cheeks. "Just one more year and then you'll be free to your heart's content," The three girls chuckled along, Sammi continuing to pack her belongings on the living room floor.

"Hey Sam, I have a question," said Emma.

"Shoot,"

"Do you have any regrets moving over by yourself? I'm starting to think about what I wanna do when I graduate,"

"You're gonna leave me and move away?" asked Sabrina, raising an eyebrow.

"You're gonna leave us?" corrected Sammi.

Emma giggled at the two. "No, I'm not moving out just yet. I just want to know what it's like here since it's the 'gay mecca'. I have to be with the lesbians at some point," joked Emma.

Sammi stared into the distance for a moment, pursing her lips as she thought about the question, "Yeah I actually do. I wish I never moved here,"

"What? Why?" asked Emma, scrunching her brows together.

"Think about it. I didn't make any friends here. I only met rude and miserable people when I had the chance to make friends. All I have are bad memories. Me leaving didn't do any good back home with Nikki, leading to another fight with Vince. I should've just stayed in L.A,"

"Damn I never thought about it that way," said Sabrina.

"Me neither," added Emma.

"If I stayed then maybe I wouldn't have any awkward tension between Vince and now Nikki. Maybe we'd all be living under one roof. It's just something I think about," said Sammi, looking down at the scattered photos.

"Well hey, who needs friends when you have us," said Emma, swinging an arm around Sabrina to pull her into their side. Sammi only smiled at the two with a sweet chuckle before going back to finishing the last of the photos, taping the box shut.

"You do have multiple points. Speaking of which, how are the guys since getting out of rehab?" asked Sabrina.

"They are currently in Canada working on a new album, so that's always good. Tommy, Mick, and Vince left in April. I would say they're doing great since being out. Tommy was a big help going apartment hunting with me," said Sammi.

"What about Nik?" asked Emma.

Sammi sighed. "He went straight to Canada after being released. I haven't heard from him since that therapy session," said Sammi, lowering her eyes from Emma and Sabrina. They could see the change in Sammi's face. Even if she didn't say it loud, the girls knew Sammi missed Nikki.

"You should just go visit them," suggested Emma. "I'm pretty sure it wouldn't be the biggest shock in the world to the guys,"

"Yeah but this isn't a tour date. They're  working this time, and I don't want to be a nuisance,"

"You seriously don't think Heather or whoever is dating Vince doesn't barge in when they record back home?" asked Sabrina.

Sammi did shrug a shoulder in acknowledgment until something clicked in her head. "Wait I just remembered Mick said I could visit,"

"Then go!" shouted Emma and Sabrina in unison.

"Fine! Fine! I'll make some calls after we're home and I'm somewhat settled," said Sammi, standing up on her feet and walking to see what needed to be packed in parts of her bedroom.

June 14th, 1988

Vancouver, British Columbia, Canada

For being summer in Canada, the country proved to be the coldest place Sammi has ever visited, needing to wear her warmest leather jacket for the trip. She was quick to learn Vancouver was a calm city with still enough action going around. Sammi made a mental note to come back whenever L. A got too hot for her.

With the help of Doc setting Sammi up in Canada, it didn't take any time to find the recording studio Motley was working at. Sammi walked straight into the two-story building, hands in her pocket as she looked at the wooden interior. She stood right in the middle of the lobby where no one occupied the front desk, surprised by the quiet. The sound of steps walking down the stairs caused Sammi to turn on her heels, facing a young man with papers in his hand.

"Uh hey!" said Sammi, smiling politely at the young man.

"Hi… um who are you?" asked the skinny young man, walking down the last steps with hesitation.

"I'm Sammi, sorry to just pop in like this," said Sammi, extending out a hand.

"Like the name. I'm Kevin," said Kevin, shaking Sammi's hand. "What can I help you with?"

"Well I was wondering if Motley Crue was here right now. I'm Tommy's little sister," said Sammi, fixing the strap of her purse.

"Oh yeah they're upstairs with their producer right now. Did they know you were coming?" asked Kevin.

"No, I wanted to surprise them. It's been kind of boring back in California," smiled Sammi to hopefully let Kevin lead her to the boys.

"Well…" said Kevin, looking up the stairs and back at Sammi. "I know their producer Bob might not like you being here but I do know you're pretty special to the guys,"

"Yeah, the guys and I are pretty tight,"

"Alright then come with me," said Kevin, leading Sammi up the stairs. Kevin led Sammi through a spacious long hallway, knocking on the second door to their right. He peeked his head inside once, opening the door slightly. "Um, sir, the boys have a visitor,"

"I said no visitors. These four don't need any female distractions," said Bob in a deep and intimidating voice. Sammi almost regretted surprising the boys if they had this man working with them.

"It's Tommy's sister Sammi, sir,"

"Sammi!" yelled Tommy, Sammi hearing his steps rush out the door. Tommy swung the door open and, in one quick movement, engulfed Sammi in a tight hug, lifting her up in the air. "I've missed you!"

"It's only been 2 months!" giggled Sammi.

"I don't care, I miss you!" said Tommy, placing Sammi down on her feet. Before Sammi could say anything, she soon noticed Nikki right behind Tommy, almost in hiding. Nikki sheepishly had his hand in the back of his jean pockets and a slight smile on his lips.

"Hey, Sammi," uttered Nikki, stepping closer to Sammi. Sammi couldn't keep her eyes off Nikki, first noting every single new thing about the man. He had more tattoos all down his arm of what appeared to be Japanese artwork. It complimented his now bigger biceps and toned body, seeing Nikki's pecs through his shirt. Tommy could see the shock and plan to gawk on Sammi's face, finding it downright humorous.

When Nikki stood right in front of Sammi, Sammi blinked rapidly and cracked a smirk. "Wow. You look…" lingered Sammi.

"Different?" blushed Nikki.

"I was going to say great. You look great with your new look," smiled Sammi, finally one take forward and hugging Nikki like normal. Nikki didn't question anything, wrapping his strong arms tightly around Sammi. She could feel the difference in strength right away.

"Come on, let's not be greedy," said Tommy, grasping Sammi's shoulder and leading her into the recording room.

Without Sammi facing the terror twins, Tommy flashed a smirk to Nikki as if the adults were back to being teenagers in high school. Mick was the first to welcome Sammi in, heading straight for a hug and a pat on her head.

"Ain't this a surprise, Little girl," said Mick.

"You're the one who told me to come," smiled Sammi, causing Mick to shrug his shoulder.

Mick was almost pleased with himself. "Didn't think you'd take the bait," chuckled Mick. Mick looking healthy was Sammi's first thought, causing the smile to stick on her lips.

"Hey Sammi," said Vince, going straight for a hug that was gladly returned. "Finally we can have some fun around here,"

Right as Sammi was close to responding when the sight of Bob caused her to shut her mouth. Bob was a big tall man whose voice matched everything about him physically. He towered over Sammi, glaring down at her with an intense stare. Sammi took a few steps back, almost hiding right behind Nikki.

"Am I really that scary?" asked Bob, breaking into a smile.

"Do you want an honest answer?" asked Sammi, staying beside Nikki. Nikki crossed his arms, puffing his chest to seem as if he was protecting Sammi. Bob nodded. "You're more than a foot taller than me and built like a football player. You are scary to me!" said Sammi. Everyone burst into laughter, any tension dissipating.

"Well I am not a mean person. It's a pleasure to meet you, Sammi. You just came at the right second, the boys are on a break," said Bob.

"I really hope I'm not imposing. I can just go back to my hotel and wait,"

"No!" said Motley in unison.

"Sammi trust us, we need you for a bit," said Nikki, squeezing Sammi's shoulder gently.

"You can stay for the rest of the session if you like, Sammi. I'm serious. If anyone needs me, I'll be in the offices. We'll start recording vocals in 20," said Bob, walking out, having Kevin follow him right behind. Sammi let out a sigh of relief, happy to not bother anyone who was working with Motley.

"See, Sam, you're welcome wherever you go," said Tommy pulling out a chair for Sammi that she accepted.

"I guess I am. But enough about me, how's the album going?" excitedly asking Sammi, smiling with bright eyes at the guys.

As the guys all settled back into their seats, Mick whipped out a piece of paper of every song for their new album, all in Nikki's handwriting. Sammi took the form for closer examination, reading off every circled name of a song.  

"Okay so we have 'Dr. Feelgood'. That one sounds cool. 'Slice of Your Pie', I wonder what that one's about," said Sammi, glaring at all the guys with a smirk.

"Get your mind out of the gut, Samantha," teased Vince.

"Rattlesnake Shake. That one also sounds cool. Kickstart My Heart. That has to be about Nikki. Without you?" stopped Sammi, scrunching her brows together. She looked up at Motley, trying to read all their faces. Vince and Tommy shifted their eyes to each other, looking at Nikki and Mick. Nikki bounced his leg a bit more than usual. "What's 'Without You' about?" asked Sammi. Nikki and Tommy glanced at each other, waiting for one of the two to speak.

"It's a song about Heather and I. You know how record labels are about having love songs on albums," said Tommy, putting on a somewhat convincing smile.

"Oh so you wrote a song!" exclaimed Sammi. "That's awesome. Did you help him, Nikki?" Nikki shook his head. "Well can I hear it? Especially if you wrote it Tommy,"

"It's not done yet, Sam. We still need the instruments on some parts," said Vince, Nikki thanking him in his mind. "Anyway! How many days are you staying in Vancouver?" asked Vince.

"I'm only staying for 2 days. I just wanted to make sure you four were still good and running," said Sammi.

"Awe come on Sammi, you don't have to worry about us. We're adults who have now figured out life. Kind of," said Vince with a proud smug smile.

"Vince is right and we can prove it to you," said Nikki.

"Oh really? How so?" asked Sammi, raising a brow with a smirk to Nikki.

"How about you come out to our rental tonight. We can all make dinner together and catch up especially since I haven't seen you in months," said Nikki, matching Sammi's smirk.

"And whose fault is that, Nikki?" asked Tommy, chuckling at the glare he received. Sammi snickered but hid her smile behind her hands as Nikki faced her again.

"That sounds like a great idea, Nik. I would love that," smiled Sammi. It was like they were in their own little world again, where Nikki only knew Sammi. Vince didn't feel the massive sting of jealousy as before, only by a quarter of the feeling. Nevertheless, he had to admit it was nice to see Sammi happy as well as Nikki.

"I can pick you up from your hotel, Sam. Our place is basically in the middle of nowhere. It's by a small lake!" said Tommy.

"Well isn't that cute. I hope you four are ready for my cooking," teased Sammi, standing up from her seat as she noticed Bob about to walk into the room again. It was time to somewhat finish what the boys started, more vocals on Vince's behalf. Sammi just sat on the loveseat right behind Nikki with a happy smile on her face.

"Okay!" Bob clapped. "Let's get back to work!"

*

Sammi shouldn't have been surprised when she first laid eyes on Motley's rental house that appeared to be a country log cabin. It subtly screamed Nikki and his Idaho roots. A beautiful two-story log cabin in the middle of the green forest with a lake within walking distance. It was a fantastic little escape for the guys after a long day at the studio, calling this home for who knows how long. In the open space kitchen, Sammi and Tommy served the five plates ready for Sammi's food. Nikki set up the dining table with forks and knives, placing the guys' drink of choice. Without asking her, Nikki popped open a bottle of Sammi's favorite red wine and poured a glass for her. It didn't take much energy for Nikki to completely ignore the alcoholic drink. Vince and Tommy set the plates of food on top of each placemat while Mick put the garlic bread basket right in the middle. Everything smelled amazing.

"Okay! Are we all ready to eat?" asked Sammi, walking into the dining room, seeing Motley sat down like well-behaved children with Tommy leaving a spot right next to him. "I'll take that as a yes," Sammi said, sitting beside her brother.

It was a comfortable silence that filled the room. Only the sound being made was of forks hitting the plates that felt like music to Sammi's ears. Silent people eating was a compliment for Sammi.

"I forgot how great your cooking is, Sammi," said Vince, finally taking a breather as he sipped on his glass of water.

"It's just spaghetti with meatballs," snickered Sammi, looking over Tommy to see Vince.

"Yes but we are used to frozen meatballs and pregos spaghetti sauce," said Mick, mouth almost full of food.

Sammi shook her head, taking another bite of a meatball. She glanced over at Nikki right in front of her, smiling at how he ate in silence. "Nikki seems to love my food. His head has been down his plate the entire time." teased Sammi. Nikki only flipped Sammi off in a matter she knew was playful. Sammi notices her glass of wine, looking around the guys. She smelled it and took a sip, happy to know it's her favorite. "Did you pour me some wine, Tommy?" Tommy shook his head.

"I did," said Nikki. "I thought you would enjoy a nice glass of wine,"

"But-"

"Sam, you don't have to quit drinking just because we did," said Mick, patting Nikki on the back. Sammi didn't say anything else, taking another sip of her wine.

"So, Samantha, a little birdie told me you got your pharmacy license. How does it feel being a full time grown up?" asked Nikki, relaxing in his chair.

"I'm so happy I passed, I did not want to react that stupid exam. Now it's just interviews back in L.A," said Sammi.

"Finally settled in at your new place?" asked Tommy, finishing the last of his food.

"Yeah I just need to figure out what to put in the second room. I only have my San Francisco sofa,"

"I'm surprised you kept anything from that tiny place," said Vince. "This might sound so stupid but does a pharmist apply? All I can think of is Walgreens,"

"I am mainly aiming at the hospitals now that most have their own private pharmacy," answered Sammi, finishing the last drop of wine. "Oh! I almost forgot! I finally bought a new car! It's a mustang,"

"Hallelujah! She finally listened!" said Nikki, dropping his head back to pretend he was looking at God.

Sammi smirked and flipped him off. "Great to know you didn't leave your sarcasm at rehab,"

"Oh, I love family dinners!" exclaimed Tommy, being the first of a domino effect to rise from his seat to take his dirty plate to the kitchen. Mick and Vince soon left, leaving Nikki and Sammi alone. They stayed in silence, Sammi scratching her neck as she looked away from Nikki. Nikki kept his eyes on Sammi.

"Do you wanna go for a walk outside? I can show you the lake," asked Nikki. Sammi only nodded.

*

As Nikki and Sammi walked beside the stream, they still kept a fair distance between themselves, keeping a guard up. Compared to how they were only a moment ago, they couldn't speak to each other the same way in privacy. One of them had to break the wall first, but they didn't know who it would be or what they would say first.

"I'm sorry," said Sammi.

Nikki halted, scrunching his brows in deep 11's at Sammi. "What? You're sorry? For what?"

Sammi sat down on the dry grass, inching close to dip her finger in the cold lake water; Nikki sat beside her. "I started to think after the therapy session about how we started, and I realized I wasn't nice. It wasn't ideal to how a couple should start,"

"Sammi-"

"Just hear me out, please," said Sammi, biting her lip as she stared out into the water. "When I got with Vince I knew you had feelings for me, but I didn't do anything about it. I just ditched you and you have to admit that must've hurt, Nikki. Even if we got together in the end,"

Nikki sighed out, pulling out pieces of grass under his feet. "Yeah it did,"

"I should've never gotten with Vince right after we had sex for the first time, and I'm sorry I would go to you when Vince pissed me off, I shouldn't have done that either. I knew how much you cared about me and I still listened to Athena & Tommy. I should've just chosen for myself," said Sammi, finally looking at Nikki.

"Would you have gotten with Vince even if your siblings weren't in your ear?" asked Nikki.

"No… but I think I needed it. I needed that little heartbreak to learn," said Sammi.

"Thank you. I appreciate it, Sammi. I really do," said Nikki with a smile. Sammi sighed out, feeling the weight leave her shoulders.

"Also I'm so fucking sorry I called you by that name. I was just-"

"Sammi, again, I appreciate it," chuckled Nikki. Silence soon filled between them again.

"Hey, have you happened to have any 'demons' hit you up?" asked Sammi.

Nikki dryly chuckled. "If you mean my past drug buddies, only one. Veronica called me when I was in rehab,"

"Oh," said Sammi in straight monotone.

"Don't worry, she finally got the idea we're not getting married,"

"Hope she returned that fucking ring. What did she want?" asked Sammi.

Nikki smiled at Sammi, finding her jealousy amusing. "She said she almost overdosed a week before calling me, only to have her call me high off her ass. So I just wished her well and hung up. I couldn't handle that,"

"You sadly can't fix them all I guess," said Sammi sadly.

"I'm scared, Sam. I'm scared to go back to L.A," blurted out Nikki.

"Why?"

"Because I'm not the same Nikki that left. I know I'm going to lose friends but what if I get home and find out I really had no one this whole time?" asked Nikki, looking down at the grass. "Then what do I do?"

Sammi swallowed away her nerves, inching closer to Nikki as she laid a gentle hand on his bicep. "Hey, look at me," said Sammi. Nikki turned, eye dilating from how close to Sammi for the first time. "You have people now who truly care about you and you alone. I can already see a better relationship between you and the guys," Sammi soon grew hesitant, looking away from Nikki for a second. "And you have me. That's all you need right now after finally getting better. Remember that," said Sammi, squeezing Nikki's arm.

It took all of Nikki's strength to not lean in and kiss Sammi but be a miracle he managed. "Thank you, Sammi. I appreciate it," said Nikki. Sammi rested on her knees and hugged Nikki the best way they could. Nikki leaned into her, wrapping an arm around her waist.

June 15th, 1988

A knock on the hard hotel door almost scares Sammi, jumping off her bed and softly tiptoeing to look through the peephole. When seeing Nikki appear anxious in the hallway, she swung the door open with worry.

"Nikki, what's wrong? Are you okay? Are the guys okay?" asked Sammi in one breath, lightly placing a hand on his chest. Nikki shook his head, walking right into the single bed hotel room.

"I, um, I just really needed to give you something before you go tomorrow," said Nikki, rubbing his fingers together in a nervous habit.

Sammi eyed Nikki, not downplaying scanning him from head to toe. "Okay but just know you're scaring me," said Sammi, sitting at the foot of the bed. Nikki stood right in front of Sammi, pulling out a cassette tape from his jean pocket. He gave it one last look before handing it to Sammi, not looking her in the eye. As Sammi took the cassette, she quickly noticed "Without You" written by Nikki on the front, scrunching her brows together.

"You can play this right when I leave," said Nikki, ready to walk right out of the room. Instead, Sammi took to hold onto his wrist.

"What the hell is going on? Why're you giving me the song Tommy wrote?" asked Sammi.

Nikki sighed. "Tommy didn't write it. I did. It's finally a love song I wrote that isn't disguised… and that's about us,"

"You wrote me a love song?" smiled Sammi. Nikki nodded with a blush on his cheeks. Sammi couldn't help it any longer, standing on the tips of toes, cradling Nikki's face as she leaned in for that kiss. A kiss so soft and kind, Nikki felt his heart burst out of his chest, afraid to kiss again.

"Thank you," whispered Sammi, a smile still on her lips. Nikki scoffed, matching a smile. "But I need to listen to this right now," Sammi said, darting straight to the radio on the desk table. Nikki didn't protest, only groaned as he dropped himself on the bed, hiding under a pillow. The song in its entirety was touching but more so for Sammi, paying deep attention to every lyric. Sammi took the cassette out when it finished, looking over at Nikki's body thrown on the bed. She stretched herself on the bed, taking the pillow off Nikki's face to see his deep red flush.

"I love you," said Sammi. Nikki looked up in shock at Sammi, lips parting as if he wanted to say something. But all he caught was another kiss from Sammi with more passion. The two fell almost into the same old routine, Nikki's hand caressing Sammi's hair, Sammi's hand on Nikki's clothed chest. As Sammi started to lower her hands, the feeling of excitement turned into anxiety for Nikki in a blink of an eye.

"Sammi," whispered Nikki, placing his hands on her shoulders, giving the distance between them.

"What's wrong?" asked Sammi. Nikki slowly sat up, wiping the sweat off his hands. He took a few deep breaths, not able to look in Sammi's direction. "Are you okay, Nikki?"

"Remember when I told you I was scared?" asked Nikki. Sammi nodded. "Being with you like this was in that same word," said Nikki, meeting Sammi's worried eyes. "I-I've never been sober and doing this… with you,"

"Not even a little sober?" asked Sammi.

"When I say I was dependent, I really mean it. I needed a bit of something to bring me nerves down,"

"Guess your shyness didn't go away either," joked Sammi, rubbing her finger softly on Nikki's cheek. "Nikki, I'm not going to pressure you to do anything you don't want to do,"

"And trust me I do. It's just what if I'm bad at everything I thought I was good at between us?"

"I don't think it works like that, sweetheart. But I still don't want you to feel pressured to sleep with me. We can just cuddle and fall asleep. It'll be okay," reassured Sammi.

Nikki smiled lovingly at Sammi, leaning in to kiss her softly. "I love you, Sammi Lee. I really do," whispered Nikki.

Sammi's cheeks flushed. "And I love you, Nikki Sixx," whispered Sammi, leaning her head on Nikki's shoulder.

"Come on, you have a flight in the morning," said Nikki, playfully pushing Samami down on the bed. As Nikki stood at the bed's foot to strip down to his boxers, Sammi got under the soft white covers. The two fell back into the routine of late-night tv and cuddles. Nikki having his arm securely around Sammi with her head laid on his bare chest. The feeling of calm security quickly engulfed the two after a long marathon of danger. It was perfect.

[klossykaylorswift]

My version of what I think went down with Kaylor.

I’m a long time OG Kaylor from 2013-14. I would love it if they were still together. It would make my little lesbian heart so happy! But, there are a few songs on this album that make me thing they broke up. I just want to throw some things I’ve noticed out here. Some are facts and others are hypothesis. I’ve gone back-n-forth on whether I think they’re still together or not. I think her last couple albums have had some songs that made me think... well, maybe they’re not.

The 1

We were something, don't you think so? Rosé flowing with your chosen family And it would've been sweet If it could've been me In my defense, I have none For digging up the grave another time But it would've been fun If you would've been the one

The above lyrics say to me that Karlie choose Josh’s family and the Rosé is about her wedding to him. Then, the grave reference reminds me of the “I TRIED” pin with the daisy growing out of it. “For digging up the grave another time”. I think that means Taylor tried many times to get her back. There’s another lyric, “never leaving well enough alone”. That one also makes me think Taylor really did try. I think when she says “You wear the same jewels that I gave you, as you bury me”. Means, Karlie married him any way, even knowing that Taylor’s heart was broken beyond any pain she will ever feel again.

Cardigan

Chase two girls, lose the one

I’m going a different direction than some of you because I think the person who chased two girls and lost “the one’ (being Karlie) is Taylor. These two songs are linked in my opinion because they are both about ‘the 1’ I think maybe Taylor made a mistake, she confessed to her (make confessions and were begging for forgiveness) but because of it, she lost Karlie: The 1  

I think after they broke up, Karlie chose to go back to Josh and because he lost her the first time, he quickly put a ring on it. She took his family not Taylor’s.

Then, here’s where I get back on the Kaylor Train. I just think Josh is really gay with Mikey and that it very well could be a long time bearding situation. But, if it isn't just bearding then maybe she really did marry him. It would make sense of why Karlie would continue bearding even after finding happiness with Taylor.

Exile

I can see you standing, honey With his arms around your body

Laughin’ but the jokes not funny at all And it took you five whole minutes To pack us up and leave me with it Holdin' all this love out here in the hall

I again get the feeling this is Karlie marrying Josh. And, right after that comes:

My Tears Ricochet

I know some of you think this is about losing her masters to SB2. I do not think a song with this much lost love emotion would be about that, Mad Woman is about that, definitely. Again, I think Taylor tried very hard to get Karlie back but it was too late. Probably why Taylor has a lot of regrets about it. However, I think what Karlie did to Taylor on multiple occasions (in my opinion) was so awful.

This song rips my heart out. How much pain Taylor felt watching Karlie being with Josh, her working under Scooter, the person who said he ‘owns’ Taylor. If you recall, Karlie was hanging out with that uber rich group including Scooter and his wretched wife on Geffen’s yacht. The worst people, the very ones that caused Taylor so much pain. I think Karlie burned her bad. Like they were all enjoying themselves, laughin’ (just like the above lyric, but the joke was not funny). It was in Taylor’s face. Like how could Karlie do that to her?  I know some of you think ‘contract’, but I don’t think so. Karlie doesn’t need money. And, If she’s in a relationship (or was in one ) with Taylor, she certainly did not  need the money! I just know Taylor would not want her girlfriend (or wife, whatever you want to believe) to be with the same assholes that behind her back bought her masters and forever took away her music. These are the people who fucked up her life, took her life’s work and basically tore it from her grasp. You want me to believe that Taylor was okay with her woman doing that because she was bearding for Josh? I mean really, just think about it.

It must have emotionally destroyed Taylor. I think she must have been so angry and cried a lot over this scenario going down. Watching Karlie laughing with those assholes must have ripped her heart out. I think Taylor may have went off screaming and crying, trying to get her back. That’s why she didn’t have it in herself to go with grace because maybe she went off on Karlie, Maybe, this song is about how things went down when they ended it.  

Okay, that’s my hypothesis. I then, recall the home video of CIWYW and when Taylor is singing, playing the guitar, she puts her foot up so the camera cant see her mouth and then its clear as day: Karlie sings the next part. Taylor smiles! If that happened before or after the yacht thing, I don’t know. But for me, that’s the biggest piece of Kaylor proof that they’re together. Taylor says “I love you” to the person who filmed it ( I know for a fact it was Karlie) when you watch that clip on Miss Americana. That, along with many, many, many, other pieces of proof.

As you can see, I go back and forth as to if they’re still together or not!

Here’s a couple things people probably already know:

Peter Losing Wendy is a Peter Pan reference. Peter Pan’s part was mostly (or always) played by a women. Interesting she picked that couple.

Rebekah West Harkness is also known as Betty Harkness.

Rebekah had a group of female friends she called the “bitch pack”. It was not used by Taylor as a 2014 “squad” reference.

Okay, thanks for coming to my Ted talk... good talk!  Happy 2020!

[flying-elliska]

Skam France Season 6 Review

It’s that time, I guess. My feelings are, like many, mixed. I think I enjoyed the season more than most people here, but the ending was a massive let down. Overall it boils down to this : Skam France is great at moments and very bad at structure. A lot of my issues with the season is what is not in it. I saw so much potential that never quite materialized, and it left me frustrated. At the same time, Lola is a really cool character, her arc is really interesting, her relationship with her sister is one of the best things they’ve ever done, and the actors killed it. Loved La Mif, discovering other sides of Eliott, the urbex backgrounds, and Maya. A lot of fascinating character moments. This is definitely my second favorite season after s3 - at times I even thought it would equal it. Sadly, though, Skam France will remain a bit of a one hit wonder for me. Because they are so good at bringing up problems in a nuanced layering way - be it addiction, grief, eating disorders, internalized ableism, racist microagressions - but when it comes to resolving what they brought up, they default towards a ‘let’s all be nice to each other, hug or kiss, love saves the day yay !’ story. Which is, when you claim to deal with real world issues, simplistic, immature, and at times quite offensive. It works for s3, which is at its core a tale of self-discovery, self-acceptance and romance. But niceness doesn’t solve racism, and family problems aren’t solved with a hug, and addiction recovery doesn’t hinge on having someone to kiss, and the series came dangerously close to implying that at times. 

All in all, this is a show that often manages to be both brilliant and terrible at the same time. At least it’s not dull. 

Positives/Negatives/Meh breakdown :

Positives :

- Sisterly love : My favorite thing without a doubt is the relationship between Lola and Daphné. Flavie and Lula killed it. Almost all the clips that made me cry were the ones with the both of them in it. At the beginning their rivalry is so relatable to me : the responsible sibling who takes on too much burdens and is too controlling and parentified vs. the problem sibling who acts out to express the issues the rest of the family are repressing - i have been in both of those spots. you can see how they slowly realize that the gap between them didn’t need to be there, that it wasn’t their fault, that it was the result of their parent’s bullshit and even shittier circumstances. seeing them make little gestures to recognize each other’s pain, to nurture each other, to give each other support, but also to tell each other some unpleasant truths, was so incredibly powerful. Relationships between sisters can be just so...complex, and loving, and petty, and jealous, and supportive, and feral, and annoying, and understanding, and ugh, they made me feel all of that and more. I have a sister, and I have a relationship like that with her, and this season gave me some very important perspectives. Really, relationships between women aren’t explored enough, and this season really did this one thing excellently and if only for that, it deserves to be watched. That moment where Lola talks to Daphné about her self destructive tendencies...so important. I am so happy that Daphné was the one finding Lola in her tower of solitude, and the moment where she says ‘you pay too much attention to what other people think, Lola’ was the emotional turning point of the season for me, because it was Daphné recognizing Lola really cared behind her mask of coldness, but also that she was hurt by that and that she needed to love herself regardless of the love her parents didn’t give her ; and also that she heard Lola saying it to her and that it inspired her too, so there is this amazing reciprocity. It was so powerful, I’m still reeling from it. And it was a beautiful full circle from the beginning of the season. 

- Family of outsiders : the urbex gang was such a wonderful new group this season. It was bound to be tricky getting us to like this new generation, and I think they did a pretty good job. Even tho I wish we got to know them a bit more, they were all intriguing and interesting on their own, and the vibes of Lamif as a whole were just so fun and lovely. Loved the neuroatypical vibes I got from Sekou and Jo. Love that they introduced a trans guy character. Loved Maya as group mom. And seeing them warm up to Lola was really sweet. The social media of them hanging out was more or less the only good social media we got this season lmao. The urbex thing was a great symbol for Lola finding a home with the outcasts, a bit on the fringe of society, and the start of acceptance, of bringing her in from the cold. Maya and Lola’s relationship fit in that really nicely, especially the bits about them talking about their shared experiences of grief, and my favorite scenes with them is showing Lola that her scars can be beautiful and that her rough experiences are part of who she is. The way she didn’t take Lola’s bullshit was great, and even tho I think their relationship was rushed, overall they really fit well together. Love Maya’s character as a concept in general, this funky purple haired lesbian environmentalist with amazing sense of style, and I really hope we see her again in upcoming seasons. And finally, I also really liked Eliott and Lola’s friendship (except for the ending) - the fact that they understand this darkness that they share, but that Eliott has succeded in climbing over it, and so he can give Lola support, understanding, guidance. I loved that we got to hear a bit more of his perspective on mental illness, the good and the bad times, that we saw his passion for movies become more real. I loved the fact that they bonded over creative things and photography, too, and that she found a safe space in the video store. And even tho it wasn’t resolved properly, the scene where he comes to get her and punches Aymeric really made me cry. Also, BASILE. Best bro in law ever. Their scenes together were so homey and warm and sweet. They will have such a good relationship in time. Overall, I really like how central friendship was in this season, shown as so powerful and important. They could have done more with it but I love a lot of what we got. I am just a sucker for found family, man.

- Lola herself : I know she was a controversial character right from the start. She’s been called manipulative, selfish, out of control, toxic. And honestly at times...maybe she was a bit. I still love her. She is just so interesting to me. The lack of compassion towards her in the fandom was seriously depressing at times, and often felt like a symptom of something I’ve seen in a lot of different fandoms, ie the capacity to only tolerate moral ambiguity when it’s attached to attractive white male characters - and to only tolerate mental illness symptoms when they can be romanticized. In the end, she’s a struggling teen from a deeply dysfunctional family who’s had a very rough life, of course she’s not going to be well adjusted. All in all, I think she’s so brave, and she is a fighter. I adored her feral energies in the trailer. I also really liked her blunt honesty at times, even if it was sometimes hurtful and excessive. I think because I have the opposite tendency to be afraid to speak my mind, I really dig a character who isn’t afraid to speak the ugly truth. Even though, again, ‘the truth’ isn’t always cut and clear, and what Lola is often doing instead is listening to ‘depression voice’ who tells her to believe the worst in people. I find that fascinating, because in my experience, yes, depression comes with this terrible lucidity that makes you see through a lot of bullshit but at the same time, is distorting your perspective because of fear and shame, and kicking that, and disentangling your perception from that fatalism, is very complicated. I loved how genuine she was, how mature too sometimes through the pain, more mature than she should have been. It was rough watching her relapse, but I think the portrayal of addiction was pretty very well done overall, not romanticized and explained in a very coherent way. I wish the show had given her a bit more of a clearer view of her inner thoughts towards the end and let her apologize a bit more. And a clearer realisation that her parent’s lack of well expressed love didn’t doom her. But...yeah Following her really made me question my own - more hidden - self destructive impulses, linked to family shit, that pushes me to sabotage and isolate myself. Like Eliott said to her - it’s really a lifelong struggle. I think overall her arc was pretty satisfying, learning to step away from the edge, letting people in, seeing that she isn’t alone, accepting she deserves better and that her failures don’t doom her. That it is about getting up and trying again. Love her using her mother’s camera and wanting to get a phoenix tattoo, a perfect symbol for her. Also Flavie was amazing, she’s got a bright future ahead.

Negatives :

- No follow up to the assault storyline : The thing that I am, without any single doubt, most mad about, is the fact they didn’t bring up the sexual assault again. Along with Charles’ rape apologism, this creates a very dubious pattern of trivializing the issue ‘as long as it’s not real rape’. The fact that the morning after immediately turns to Elu drama is what sort of started my disconnect from the season, and the fact that they don’t bring it up afterwards even once made me angry. I think Lola, before going back to the hospital, should have told someone about the abuse she endured there, and should have told someone about Aymeric, even if only to acknowledge she wants to be done with that part of her life. Aymeric is like...Lola’s biggest villain, in a sense, he is a horrible predator but he also somehow represents her worst impulses, that part of herself that tells her she doesn’t deserve better, and I think that as a character, he was interesting, and he should have been adressed/exorcised better. If Lola was a real person, of course, she would probably have to deal with this in therapy, down the line, later, but as a story, never adressing this again left it unfinished. And this is really the kind of event you NEED catharsis and resolution for. Otherwise, it’s irresponsible.

- A generally overstuffed and disjointed structure : My biggest problems with this season are about what isn’t and what isn’t it. I liked most of the clips, I don’t have an issue with them going dark, strangely enough, but the way they were put together was just...messy. Like many people have said, too much stuff not properly adressed. Palm of most annoyingly useless subplot, the whole Tiff thing. Yes, it was cool comparing her clique to Lamifex and Lola realizing she wants nothing to do with those shallow fake bitches. Sekou hacking her account to replace it with pigeons, amazing. After that though, it should have been DONE, and in general, it should have taken a lot less time and attention. Comparing Tiff’s social media addiction to Lola’s issues felt like some trivializing bullshit. The whole thing was just so annoying. It would have been good if it had led to some discussion of social inequality but like...not this shit. Char, equally useless (although, cool actress, cool style). Another MASSIVE problem is the lack of follow through on big clips. A great thing about SKAM, usually, is that it shows you the aftermath of big moments - characters lying in bed, cuddling, talk to their friends, crying in the shower, etc. It allows the viewer to breathe and really get into the character’s perspective, to be comforted and process drama, and for the emotions to resonate better, to have space to develop richly. Here...we had Lola brush off her assault, we saw nothing after Daphné got her back from the tower thinking she could have killed herself, we learned that they had money problems and the father didn’t go to work and then that was never adressed again and the light was turned back on by magic (????), we saw Eliott go on a major bender and didn’t really see how he got better, etc. Big lack of introspective clips in the latter part of the season took me out of Lola’s head. It was all stressful and breathless, all intensity and no pause like one grating high pitch note instead of music, it felt oppressive, with poor contrast, and very badly paced. It made everything blur together and feel less relevant. The problem with that is it really takes you out of the story ; it’s hard to care when you know whatever is happening might not have a resolution, and it doesn’t put you in the shoes of the character. This was compounded by how mediocre the social media was, when it is usually used to bridge in the gaps. And then to finish : the structure was so uneven, especially in the second part of the season. Towards the middle we had some very short episodes with very underwhelming endings, and Vendredis that felt like non events, and there wasn’t a lot happening - and then, bam, ep 9, drama overload, almost like misery p*rn, and then a super rushed resolution in ep 10. Like they cared more about twists and giving the opposite of what was expected instead of solid coherent narrative and rhythm. The romantic back and forth felt repetitive as hell too. All in all, it made for a very unsatisfying live watching experience, pretty sure anyone who didn’t watch live would like it a lot more. 

- The last two episodes : Really, I could have overlooked all the problems with the season if they had given us a good ending, but...they really really didn’t. And contrasted with last season, where my problems were focused on the middle, for me the ending is really the worst part of this season. I didn’t dislike the controversial club clips, I liked having the insight into Eliott’s insecurities, but they should never have brought those up if they weren’t going to let him adress them properly. Having everything go to shit in Lola’s life at once felt like overkill - they really should have solved those problems earlier, and then dealt with a few ones properly, showed us Lola freaking out on her own, and taken out the bullshit at the high school. Thierry slapping her was also too much, he could just have said these clumsy things. She could have distanced herself from Maya instead of pushing her away again. Also, they really should have had this happen in episode 8 again, and given us a proper resolution. While the tower sequence was incredibly powerful, I pretty much liked nothing after that. It was so annoying that Eliott brushed off Lola’s apology because while he wasn’t wrong that he decided to get drunk himself, she still needed to apologize and actually state that she wanted to get better so she didn’t hurt her friends, so as a resolution it was very mediocre. Thierry recognizing they should have given Lola the choice to go the hospital was a step but really not enough. And the moments with Maya were cute sure but mostly cheesy and unearned. Same for the ending clip. Mostly it’s such an unsatisfying farewell to the old generation, and it really feels like they wanted us to force to move on - didn’t want to properly recognize the end of an era, gave us almost nothing about their BAC or their future plans, etc etc. Also, letting Charles talk and having Arthur and Alexia kiss again ? SO BAD. UGH. I will be forever disappointed they didn’t give us a Multi POV or at least sth better on social media. And not having Eliott’s POV or at least a real Elu conversation (pretty much all season...) so frustrating I will never not be bitter about that. So yeah. The season started so powerfully but went out with a whimper instead of a bang. That whole ‘romantic love solves everything!!!’ shtick...very undercooked tbh. 

Meh : 

- Mayla’s development : I wanted to stan them SO BAD. Like, wlw in skam (that doesn’t turn into a panphobic mess?) YES, all the way yes. Maya and Lola had great chemistry, great dynamic. I loved their first few clips, the kind of confrontational flirting, the boldness, it was like...damn girls ! we love a non useless lesbian ! But...somewhere along the way, their relationship really suffered from the wacky plot structure. They should have shown us more bonding before we got to the angsting (esp during first urbex night). Also, their first kiss was sweet but I hated the ‘you’re my addiction’ line and that kind of put a damper on it. I liked the scenes where they open up about difficult things, the love Maya showed to Lola’s scars, the dandelion symbolism was lovely, but it wasn’t balanced enough with other stuff, and I felt Maya was way too stoic at times. And I really, really didn’t like the ending, honestly. They kept a good balance all season showing Lola wasn’t relying entirely on romantic love, that her family and friends were also important - but saying ‘i’m okay as long as you’re here’ at the end...honestly that sounds unhealthy and codependent as fuck. I really wish they’d done a more subtle, taking it slow ending for them.

- The financial issues : Again a storyline with much potential that wasn’t dealt with properly. It’s really good that we got a main that wasn’t from an economically priviledged background. Especially it felt very relevant to Daphné’s storyline, with the shame she felt at her friends seeing her place, the pressure to make it work, tying into her ED, etc etc. But cutting off the power, the father not working going nowhere...it’s like the plotline meandered and then vanished into thin air. Instead of that, they could have given us a scene of Daphné freaking out over the bills like in OG w Vilde, keeping the focus on her for that plot because she’s the most affected ; and then in the end of the season the father taking them over from her and telling her he’s found another job and that those things shouldn’t be her responsibility. That would have been relevant, instead of just...a loose end.

- Family issues : The Lecomte family dynamic seemed fascinating to me at the start. The mom being this shadowy complicated figure. The inability of the father to deal with anything. Daphné being parentified, Lola becoming the symptom child. They could have done a lot with this, but in the end, it felt like it was brushed aside too easily by saying the mom sent letters so she wasn’t too bad and Thierry is making breakfast so he’s trying. Not enough. I wanted them to let Lola acknowledge she deserved better and that their parent’s crap wasn’t on her. That her mom should have looked for help and the other two shouldn’t have pretended everything was okay. In general, there is way too much pressure to overlook toxic parent behavior and I wish they’d been clearer about this. 

- Mental health portrayal : Some parts of it were really good. Showing Daphné’s ED, letting Eliott talk about his episodes and relapses, showing some of the dark sides of depression and addiction. They just needed to show more of the recovery, because that is often the representation that they lacked the most. I don’t blame them for showing the bad sides of the mental healhcare system (which is terribly outdated and dysfunctional in France, I’m speaking from experience) but they should have shown the good too. Like do they find recovery boring or something ? Because as a person w MI, that’s actually what I’m dying to see, and they’ve been a real letdown in that department. I also think they should have acknowledged that the Lecomte family has mental issues as a whole, that the mother should have gotten help, and the father probably needs it too (still think they should have gone to therapy as a group lol).

- Elu and Eliott’s development : Honestly, not a big fan of how they wrote Lucas in s5&s6, in a lot of clips he was the angry guy with a temper, I miss s4 Lucas who was so compassionate and showed real growth and emotional intelligence. Here it just felt like they were fitting his character to plot needs, and it’s so sad for a character who had such an amazing story development. Now, I loved the glimpses of domestic Elu we got, how Axel and Maxence really showed the intimacy that had grown between them, they really felt married with all the nonverbal conversations and touches, that was sweet. But it’s so annoying that they hinted at Lucas’s insecurities and Eliott’s lack of communications and just brushed it away with ‘oh they love each other they will be okay’ sure bitch but then show us how ? that’s the interesting stuff ? it really feels sometimes like the writer(s) didn’t like how strongly the fans focused on the romance when they wanted to be talking about MATURE dark stuff not that frilly fluffy romance shit *eyeroll* male writers who think they’re above that stuff is so annoying as is the conflating of dark and mature - anyway. Again I liked seeing Eliott in his element this season, he is really thriving, with his movie and the video store, and that made me very happy. I don’t think it’s unrealistic he didn’t make a lot of friends in uni - French university can be so isolating, there isn’t a campus or a vibrant social life like in the US, it’s a very common experience to feel lost and isolated for newbies and it was also my case - but ? Sofiane ? Idriss ??? They could have found a better excuse to implicate Lamifex in the movie making tbh, like Jo egging him on about her passion for directing or whatever, and Sofiane could have been there chilling with them it would have been so cool. I just wish Eliott would have had more of an arc like Daphné did. It wouldn’t have taken much, and since he is my favorite character, I will never not be disappointed at all the wasted potential. 

Yeah so in the end i think this was a very good story they didn’t entirely give themselves the right storytelling tools to tell. Like there is something in the way they prioritize certain moments over others that...I just find very frustrating and weird. So...flawed, but still very interesting overall.

[vexedtonightmares]

You should rank the skam France characters on vibe alone

have i been chosen to deliver the vibe check? i’ll do my best with this power (this isn’t a character ranking or anything either btw this is just pure shitposting so i’m sorry if u were expecting something more poetic 😔✌️)  

emma borges- s1 emma suffered so s2-6 emma could vibe beyond this universe. yann and emma got their development and fucked off to be shining beacons of light in every clip they’re a part of. she talked to a horse. V I B E S.

imane bakhellal- beautiful amazing incredible show stopping iconic never been done before fantastic perfection oui oui baguette. has never done anything wrong in her life. i want her to vibe check me.

yann cazas- homie did his time during season one and ever since then he’s literally just been v i b i n g. he gets points taken off for the end of 3x06, but sans ambiguite restored his power. yann is my king. socialist icon.

eliott demaury- the only reason he does not have the best vibes is because he’s just not straight vibey all the time like, say, yann cazas. by the time s6 is over he’ll just be vibing in the sixth dimensional plane of existence in his doc martens like at the end of s5, though, i believe in him.

basile savary- s3 basile failed the vibe check so hard that somehow he got knocked into another dimension and came back from it enlightened beyond words. he now passes the vibe check with flying colors.

lucas lallemant- he has pretty solid vibes, but we can’t forget his s1 snakery, unfortunately. he does get extra points for being gay, though, and for having the best hair in all of france. his chaotic energy surpasses most known rules of vibes, so he’s near the top anyway, snakery and all.

lola lecomte- fuck vibes she needs a HUG. as far as vibes go though, she’s my current self projection character, so that’s a special vibe all on its own. 

maya etienne- an environmentally conscious lesbian with purple hair who does urbex with her best friends who happen to be a delightful group of queer arty weirdos? these vibes are so sweet i can smell the roses.

alexia martineau- the colored hair in s1-4 automatically puts her vibes above so many others. queen of Deserved Better. also a certified bicon which i think is very sexy of her.

idriss bakhellal- the coolest vibes of them all, you can’t tell me any different. unfortunately, he dated ingrid, so. vibes automatically decreased.

lisa- she sleeps and makes horrible jokes and has a job as a lifeguard while she can’t swim. if that doesn’t scream vibes idk what does.

noee daucet- she’s honestly also too cool to vibe in the same way as everyone else, and that’s what makes her vibes so strong. i miss her. would have had better vibes if she was a lesbian but the same goes for everyone. 

max- vibes out of this world. lamifex is on another level, i stg, all of their vibes are so incredible i can’t help but chef’s kiss in their direction at all times. max especially, go off king just for existing. 

sofiane alaoui- turtleneck, dancing, punched charles. i rest my case.

jo- can and WILL fight a bitch. mad respect and mad vibes. also an eliott stan, which gives me the representation i never knew i needed. incredible.

sekou- history nerd who absolutely SERVED at that urbex party. no one is doing it like him. if someone tried to vibe check him he would simply pull an uno reverse, and i think that’s one of the greatest vibes out there.

manon demissy- on paper? incredible 10/10 vibes. in practice, not so much. i Love this girl do not get me wrong, but she’s pulled some straight up Not Cool moves and the fact that she’s still dating charles is the real reason her vibes are a bit crispy rn.

arthur broussard- i do not know what to do with this lil man. s3/4/6 arthur? immaculate vibes, untouchable. s5 arthur? demon. so, he’s here. 

daphne lecomte- if her vibes were a state of matter, they would be gas, because they are bouncing all over the place with no sense of pattern or rhythm. sometimes her vibes are out of this world, sometimes her vibes belong in hell. very difficult to pinpoint.

camille- vibes out of this world, the only reason he’s not higher is because he was in like 10 clips of s5 and that’s it. bonus points for camika though.

mika dolleron- not the best vibes, not the worst. always comes thru when u need him, but he’s also a bitch. he embraces it, though, which is a vibe all on its own i suppose.

alexandre delano- p chris and eva walked so emma and alex could run, i said what i said. he left after s4 tho, so that vibe isn’t very spicy. 

ingrid spielman- racist. automatic vibe check fail.

tiff- lola quite literally vibe checked her, and if the neck brace says anything, it says fail. stalking is also an automatic vibe check fail. girl. what the fuck. get ur life together. she isn’t allowed to have vibes until she does so.  

charles munier- rancid vibes, does not even deserve a ranking because we all know he is the embodiment of human garbage. 

[artificialqueens]

Tree House Kisses, Chapter 21 (Adorney) - Scorpio and Veronica

A/N: I am very excited to post this chapter, especially because I get to include this outstanding artwork by my HERO, @grinder-lector-art���. It’s the banner on my own blog and every time I look at it, I get a bit weepy-eyed. -V

Also, this seems like a good a time as any to plug the wonderful moodboards that Scorpio made to go along with this story (including a few specifically inspired by this chapter). If you’re looking for previous chapters, click here! Xoxo!

Chapter Summary: Everything falls apart. But it’s Courtney’s party, and she’ll cry if she wants to…

Chapter 21: It’s Raining on Prom Night

“Hello party guests!” Darienne called over the mic. “We are now serving dinner! Please help yourself to the lovely Mexican spread, over by the garden. It is all vegetarian and the trays marked with a pink heart are vegan. Don’t make that face, Adrian, you’ll be fine,” she chastised Adore’s brother. “Anyway, after you have your plate, the birthday girl has requested for you all to take your seats, as we have some entertainment, produced by Courtney and Thorgy and starring some people here tonight...I wonder who?!”

She stepped away from the mic, trying to help usher people towards the food, especially the slower-moving adults and the cheerleaders who were still on the dance floor fooling around.

“Mrs. Del Rio!” she beckoned Roy’s mom over. “Look, only a few people know this, but there’s a secret tray of chicken under the veggie skewers. For VIP carnivore guests only. Tell your husband.”

Aida laughed, giving her a hug. “Thank you, honey. Courtney already tipped us off, but we appreciate you looking out for us.”

“I do my best,” Darienne said, winking. She walked over to the main table where Courtney had a confused and mildly irritated look on her face. “Dari, there’s one too many seats here. Is it because of Raja? Didn’t we fix this? I don’t want an empty chair right up front, it’ll look weird--”

“Calm down, it won’t be empty.”

“Well, who’s sitting here?” Courtney put her hands on her hips.

Darienne imitated her pose, hands on her own hips, and leaned in. “It’s a surprise. Go get yourself some dinner, Miss Sweet Sixteen, and don’t worry about it!”

Courtney narrowed her eyes, and after a beat, backed down, pulling Adore and Roy with her over to the food. “I’ve got my eye on you, Darienne!”

Darienne laughed, shaking her head, and pulled out her phone.

-

“Courtney, everything is set up if you want to start the video,” Thorgy said.

“Okay…” she glanced down at her phone again. Still no answer from her dad. “Let’s just wait one more minute, until everyone is sitting.”

“Cool. Tell me when to hit the lights and then--”

“Shut up, Thorgy.” Darienne shoved him out of the way and stood behind Courtney’s chair, covering her eyes.

“Hey!”

“I told you there was a surprise, right? Well...it’s a little late due to flight delays and other extenuating circumstances, but...come on out!”

There were few delighted gasps and squeals from the table, and Courtney exclaimed, “What? What?!”

Darienne uncovered Courtney’s eyes and turned her chair around and standing there, in a black and white checkered dress, was Dela.

Courtney let out an ear-piercing shriek, jumping up and throwing her arms around her old friend. “DELA! OMIGOD! I can’t believe you’re here! How are you?! How’s Seattle?! I miss you! Oh my god!!” Courtney jumped up and down, hugging her tightly.

Dela laughed and hugged her back. “Happy Birthday, sweetie. I missed you too! Sorry I’m late…”

Courtney pulled away, teary-eyed, and sat Dela down beside her. Darienne laughingly moved the place card that had been there (Roy’s) and soon everyone was chattering excitedly and catching up, hearing about Dela’s new school in Seattle. Courtney promised to tell Dela the story in detail of how she and Roy became an official couple after the video.

“And we finally learned the truth of why Adore never liked me,” Bob joked, causing Adore to roll her eyes.

“Is it because you were so annoying?” Dela smiled.

“Absolutely,” Adore said.

“Not,” Bob added.

Courtney filled her in about the family that had moved into her house.

“See the pretty blonde over there next to Gia? Her name is Pearl. She’s really nice, actually. Adore tried to fuck her but that didn’t work out.”

Dela’s eyes widened and then she looked over at Bob, who made an “I told you so” face.

Adore scoffed, offended. “That is not how it went down.”

Courtney shrugged, smirking, and replied with a teasing, “Whatever you say,” and a hair toss.

Dela giggled. “So, I heard there’s about to be some intense walk down memory lane video? Is that true, because I love those, it’s my favorite part of every wedding, every Bat Mitzvah…”

“Yeah, we were about to play it.”

“Go for it! I better be in it though.”

Courtney grinned. “Oh, trust me. You are.”

-

As Adore suspected, the video was incredibly long and cheesy, filled with tons of photos of Courtney, Courtney with her family, Courtney with friends. There were also a lot more video clips than Adore anticipated - from recitals, home movies, including a gem from Courtney’s first day of kindergarten that she’d never seen.

“Courtney, love, please come out! Bob is waiting so nicely!” Karen cajoled.

“NO!” Courtney shouted, stomping her feet, refusing to come out the front door,

Bob, already tall and lanky at five years old, sat down on the front steps, head in his hands, clearly over Courtney and her temper tantrum.

“Courtney, why don’t you want to come out? You love school...” Karen wheedled.

She opened the door a crack and shouted, “I love PRESCHOOL! I don’t want to go to kindergarten! I’m too small! Everyone is going to be mean to me!” She slammed the door with a loud bang, continuing, “NO NO NO NO NO!”

Bob shook his head at the camera, rolling his eyes.

“Roy! Vanessa!” The camera flipped around to catch the Del Rio kids walking down the block, Karen at her wit’s end, begging them to help convince Courtney how much she’d love kindergarten.

Roy scampered inside and emerged 20 seconds later, holding Courtney’s hand, a big smile on her face.

“Roy’s gonna beat up anyone who’s mean to me!” Courtney announced happily, skipping down the steps.

Everyone at the party let out a collective “Awwwwww…”

Roy shook his head. “I was so full of shit. You think I was about to get in trouble by starting a fight my first day of school? That goes on your permanent record. Luckily for me, no one was mean to her.”

Courtney laughed and kissed him. “It was a comforting lie.”

On the screen, young Roy put his arm around Bob and led him and Courtney down the block towards the elementary school. “Kindergarten is great. You get to play all day and sing songs and do lots of fun stuff.”

“Did you like it, Roy?” Courtney asked, gazing up at him.

“I thought it was kind of boring, but I was already reading books. You’ll love it.”

Adore shook her head, chuckling, as the video faded back into photos. Even in first grade, Roy was a patronizing know-it-all.

-

Willam and Pearl dug into their food, plates piled high with enchiladas, Spanish rice, beans, grilled chicken that they’d begged off Adore’s mom, veggie skewers, salad, taquitos, and mini quesadillas, amused grins on both of their faces as they watched Courtney’s baby videos.

A video of Courtney and Adore learning to rollerblade played across the screen. A young Adore was pretty good, compared to a falling and pouting Courtney.

“Attagirl, Lesbian!” Willam cheered, earning a glare from Adore, three tables away.

Pearl leaned over and murmured, “Why does this feel like a wedding more than a birthday party?” Pearl glanced down into Willam’s lap to see him texting someone.

“Or a funeral,” Willam mumbled back, causing Pearl to laugh which was covered up by the chuckles from the crowd laughing at Adore having to hold Courtney’s hands to help her skate.

Willam slid his phone over to Pearl, to show her the texts he had been sending Adore all night. Most of them had been him insulting Adore on her horrible fashion choices during her preteen years. Pearl shook her head, snickering to herself as she shoved another mouthful of rice into her mouth.

“What y’all laughing at?” Alyssa whispered leaning forward on the table.

The screen started off black, a few girls could be heard talking. The camera shook, before a round face framed with red hair in pigtails popped into view.

“Okay, it’s on,” Darienne said before she ran off screen.

“Turn the music on!” someone hissed. Seconds later the music started and Adore ran into view, hair teased huge, in an animal print top and pleather pants. Followed by Courtney, in white gogo boots and a British flag dress.

“Ohhhh, shit!” Willam began cackling with glee.

And then the rest of the girls. April wore a black dress and stilettos, hair ironed flat. Dela was in track pants and a sports bra, and Darienne was in a little pink dress with white sketchers, sucking on a lollipop.

Yo, I'll tell you what I want, what I really, really want So tell me what you want, what you really, really want I'll tell you what I want, what I really, really want So tell me what you want, what you really, really want

Pearl’s mouth dropped open and Willam covered his mouth to hold in his laughter as they watched the girls prance around the room.

Darienne was a beat behind the rest of the girls, obviously missing steps, and clearly uncomfortable as Baby, comically overplaying the cutesy little girl thing to the point where it was nearly creepy. Dela and Courtney were the most enthusiastic, and seemed to know all the moves (with Courtney as a nearly manic Ginger and Dela really trying to sell Sporty’s “tomboy” vibe).

Watching a younger Adore, who was apparently Scary, prance around the room trying to keep up with Courtney and Dela was absolutely hilarious. Every time they had to turn, she would go the wrong way, at one point crashing into Dela and nearly knocking her over. And April’s imitation of Posh Spice, barely doing the moves at all, an air of “too cool” apathy only added to the overall disorganized vibe.

“This is soooo embarrassing,” Gia whispered to no one in particular, but everyone at the table heard her.

“Gurl,” Alyssa nodded.

WILLAM: Nice moves, you guys could have replaced the real spice girls

ADORE: Fuck off

PEARL: Was this professionally choreographed?

ADORE: Fuck. Offffff!

Adore glared at Willam and Pearl as they doubled over laughing, flipping her phone closed and crossing her arms. She watched them prance around on the screen and couldn’t help, but remember the arguments that took place just for this video to happen.

April, Adore, Courtney, Darienne and Dela had gathered at Courtney’s house and as they sat around the living room listening to the Spice Girls, Courtney suggested that they should make their own Wannabe video.  

“Oh! That’ll be so fun,” Bendela said, the other girls nodded excited about Courtney’s idea.

“I’ll go get the camera!” Courtney ran off.

“I’m Posh,” April said.

“I’m Ginger,” Adore quickly called.

“Don’t you think I should be Ginger? I mean I have red hair,” Darienne suggested and Adore made a face.

“You can be Scary,” Adore suggested.

“If we’re doing this, I think I should be Ginger, I have red hair, I’m the oldest. April should be Posh, Courtney should be Baby-”

“No, I wanna be Ginger,” Courtney rushed back into the living room with her Dad’s camera, interrupting Darienne. “I’m the biggest Spice Girls fan, and I love Geri, I--”

“Too late! I already called Ginger,” Adore said smugly.

Courtney’s mouth twisted up in anger, gripping the camera tightly; steam was practically shooting out of her ears. “Adore Delano you know I waited FIVE HOURS at the Glendale Galleria to get Geri Halliwell’s autograph, and I have the British flag dress, and I--”

“Blah blah blah, whatever Baby!”

Five minutes later and Adore and Courtney were still in a heated argument over who got to be Ginger.

April watched on in amusement, happy that no one was trying to take Posh away from her, Dela just wanted the arguing to be over and Darienne didn’t understand why they thought they were more Ginger Spice than her.

“It’s! Not! Fair!” Courtney stomped her foot, crossing her arms and pouting at Adore.

“Yes! It! Is!” Adore mocked Courtney stomping her foot and crossing her arms, “I called it first. So I’m Ginger.”

“If you’re anyone, you’re Sporty,” Courtney rolled her eyes.

Adore took a step back from Courtney, fuming, looking around the room to see the other girls’ reactions. Dela sat down next to Darienne, silently offering her snack to her.

Adore leaned to Courtney whispering, “I should have been Ginger and you know it.”

Courtney stuck her tongue out in response, before shaking her head, “I think you made a good Scary. And you’d have been good as Sporty, too.”

“What?! Now that I think about it, that was a totally homophobic suggestion,” Adore said.

“Hey, if it looks like a duck, and walks like a...well...”

Adore’s eyes bulged and her mouth opened in mock offense, and Courtney laughed, leaning over and kissing her forehead.

“I’m pretty sure I’d be the best choice for Ginger,” Darienne whispered to Dela, who nodded in agreement.

“Well, you’re the obvious Baby, Courtney! Come on!” Adore cajoled desperately.

“Ugh!!” Courtney screeched, then cried, “You know what? We don’t have to make the video at all.” She turned around and tried to run off before Adore stopped her.

“Okay, okay, fine. I’ll be Scary because she has the coolest hair and you can be Ginger,” Adore huffed out in annoyance.

“Yay!” Courtney cheered, wrapping her arms around Adore, planting a wet kiss on her cheek, “You can be Ginger next time, okay?”

“Yeah, yeah, yeah…” Adore said, knowing full well that Courtney was lying and that she’d pull the same shenanigans next time, if there ever even was a next time.

“So, that means April’s Posh, Adore is Scary, I’m Ginger, Dela you can be Sporty and Darienne can be Baby,” Courtney turned to the other girls. Darienne frowned, not really on board with the casting.

“Courtney, are you sure you don’t want to be Baby. I mean you’re blonde and cute and would make the perfect Baby,” she tried to convince her one last time.

Courtney frowned, “Do you want to be Sporty?” the tremor in her voice and the look on her face told Darienne that they would be in for another tantrum if she kept arguing, and she didn’t think she could deal with it.

“Fine, I’ll be Baby,” Darienne sighed.

-

“I’m never gonna forgive you for dredging up that Spice Girls video…” Adore grumbled.

Courtney laughed half-heartedly, shrugging. “Sorry boo, it’s my favorite.”

“I loooooved it!” Dela cried happily. “I think we should do it again, like a reunion tour. There's totally room on the dance floor.”

“Uh, how about no fucking way?” Adore retorted, a look of horror on her face. She looked to the others for support, but Courtney was distracted by her phone.

COURTNEY: Where are you? It’s almost 9…

Darienne looked at Adore and cleared her throat. “You know what I think we need? Presents.”

Adore nodded. “Yes!” she exclaimed as Courtney’s eyes lit up happily.

“Great idea!” Roy jumped up to help Darienne grab the gifts and Adore mouthed ‘THANK YOU’ at both of them. Roy smiled and gave her a wink.

-

Courtney sat in a decorated chair, ankles crossed demurely like the princess she was, everyone gathered around her wanting their present to be opened first.

“I’m only going to open a few presents for now,” Courtney announced knowing that she wouldn’t make it through everyone’s presents quick enough. “So, who wants to go first,” she sang, closing her eyes and holding her hands out, making grabbing motions.

Her dad’s parents, Grammy and Papa were the first to pass Courtney her gift, which consisted of a card and birthday money.

“Thank you, so much,” she squealed at the hundred dollars, giving both her grandparents a kiss.

Darienne decided to be the brave soul to go next. “Here you go, Courtney.”

“I wonder what it is,” Courtney shook the wrapped present causing everyone to laugh. She tore the paper off to reveal a beautifully carved frame, painted pink and white. The picture in the frame was taken at Courtney’s 13th birthday party. Courtney started to tear up at the memories that the picture brought.

Courtney stood in the center of the picture, brows furrowed cutely, with icing on her nose, a laughing Adore beside her. Roy was trying to stop Bob from digging his fingers into his slice of cake. Darienne was the only one posed for the camera with her hands on her hips and a smile on her face while April, Dela, Thorgy and Jamin were captured in the background, oblivious to the picture being taken.

“Thank you, Dari!” Courtney sniffed, pulling Darienne into a tight hug.

“You’re welcome, sweetie,” Darienne squeezed her back, “I made it the frame and painted it myself.”

Courtney grabbed the picture frame and stared at it for another moment before sitting it aside carefully, “Thank you so much.”

After Courtney sat back in her chair, Roy stepped forward with his present. “Here you go, princess.”

Courtney took the big bag from him, dramatically weighing it to see how heavy it was. Pulling out and tossing the pink tissue paper behind her, Courtney pulled out the card first. Ripping it opened, her mouth dropped at the season passes to Six Flags Magic Mountain.

“Oh my gosh! Thank you, babe,” she pulled him down her a quick kiss on the cheek, “This summer is going to be sooo fun,” she shimmied her shoulders excitedly at the thought of going to the amusement park all summer, especially since the new rides were supposed to be amazingly death-defying.

“Told you,” Adore cracked. “Whore for danger.”

“Yeah, I’m counting on it,” Roy joked quietly, and Adore made a face at him.

Courtney laughed, setting the envelope to the side, her face lighting up when she dug into the bag pulling out what looked to be lotion and bubble bath.

“Oooh,” she bounced in her seat as she unscrewed the top on the lotion to get a good whiff, “My favorite. You remembered.” She looked up at him with adoring eyes.

“Of course. Keep digging,” Roy urged.

Courtney set the lotion and bubble bath aside, reaching into the bag and pulling out a rolled-up t-shirt. She shot Roy a skeptical look before opening the shirt to get a good look at it.

“A Destiny’s Child shirt,” Courtney turned it around, holding it up for everyone else to see.

“Yes, because you’ll need it for the concert-”

“CONCERT!?” Courtney screamed, scooting to the edge of her seat looking at Roy with huge eyes.

“Yep, my cousin Monica is a dancer on the tour and she hooked us up with some dope seats when they come here in September--” Roy said.

“Ahhh!” she screeched, hopping up out of her seat to show her mom, sister and grandparents what her boyfriend had gotten her (even though they saw the whole thing) and they smiled and gasped in excitement for Courtney. Roy slid into Courtney’s seat, glancing around the room, momentarily catching Adore’s eye and smirking. She smiled back sweetly, letting him have his little moment of glory.

“Omigod, thank you!” Courtney leaped into Roy’s lap, covering his face with kisses.

“You’re really happy? I figured like, jewelry or something...you know, it would be kind of predictable. But this is something we can do together.”

She pressed their foreheads together. “You’re the best boyfriend ever, and we’re going to have the most amazing summer.” Courtney wrapped her arms around Roy’s neck, whispering, “I love you so much…”

“I love you more. Even though you’ve been a real pain in the ass…”

“Hey!” Courtney exclaimed, pulling away, but Roy pulled her back, capturing her lips in a sweet, tender kiss, hands circling her waist.

Dela looked at Adore. “Are they always like this?” she asked quietly, wrinkling her nose.

Adore stuck her tongue out, nodding. “Always. Gross, huh?”

Dela nodded, then poked Courtney on the shoulder. “Hey, birthday princess…” she sang.

“Yeahhh?” Courtney lifted her head, leaning against Roy’s shoulder, slightly glassy-eyed.

“Want another present?”

“Yes!”

Dela handed her a shiny turquoise bag.

“Wait, you really got me a present?! But you came all the way here, you didn’t need to also buy me something!”

“Awww, I love you, and you’re so full of shit!” Dela laughed.

Courtney giggled.

She opened the turquoise bag and found it stuffed to the brim with glittery nail polishes, lip glosses, and a pair of super chic retro sunglasses, which she immediately tried on, pursing her lips in a model-esque pose.

“Gorgeous! See, I knew they were you!” Dela exclaimed.

“Aw, thank you Dela,” Courtney pulled her into a hug, “I've missed you so much.”

Courtney was about to get up, when Adore asked, “Time for one more?”

“I think we can manage that,” Courtney grinned.

“Here you go.” Adore handed Courtney a long, narrow box, wrapped in black glittery paper. The tag said “2005.” “I hope it satisfies your demands.”

Courtney giggled, remembering how she’d made Adore promise that her present would make everyone jealous. She unwrapped the box, opening the velvet lid slowly. Inside was a rose gold charm bracelet.

The first charm Courtney saw was a tiny little bow. She bit her lip, holding back tears, studying at all the other charms. There were some sweet ones that represented them and their friendship, like music notes and drama masks and a little heart, and then a bunch like the bow that seemed to go with the presents she’d gotten over the last two weeks...a tree, a roller coaster, tiny little crutches, a lollipop, a microphone, a hairbrush, a ladder, the British flag.

She laughed at the skull and crossbones, then touched the one beside it, looking up at Adore’s expectant face. “What’s this one?”

“The eternity symbol. Best friends forever.” Adore’s voice was soft.

Courtney lunged forward, wrapping her into a hug, tears dripping down her face, sobbing into her neck.

“So you like it?” Adore whispered teasingly into her hair, holding back tears of her own, trying to keep things light.

“It’s perfect.” Courtney pulled away, tears still falling. “Can you help me put it on?” she asked.

“It doesn’t match your other jewelry--”

“I don’t care,” Courtney sniffled, wiping her eyes with a gloved hand.

“Okay, then.” Adore took her wrist and fastened the bracelet.

Courtney hugged her again, clinging to her tightly.

“Come on, let’s finish dinner so we can dig into that ridiculous pink cake over there,” Adore murmured.

She slung an arm around Courtney’s waist and led her back to their table, glancing at Roy on the way, who had his eyes narrowed at her. She shrugged and grinned at him, feeling a little petty, but knowing her victory was bittersweet. She may have won this round, but he was still the boyfriend.

-

DAD: Hiya kiddo. Hope you’re having a blast. I hate to be a bummer but I’m not gonna make it tonight. I’m sure you’d rather spend the night with your friends anyway. Have a fantastic birthday, I love you loads, and I promise that Katya and I will take you out to dinner real soon to celebrate.

Courtney snapped her phone closed and put it down on the table, straightening out her skirt.

Roy put his hands on her shoulder. “Did he say when he’s--”

“He’s not coming,” Courtney said flatly, clearing her throat.

Adore swallowed, trying to think of something to say that would make her feel better, and coming up dreadfully short. She looked up into Courtney’s eyes, could see how crushed her best friend was, and knew that nothing she could do would fix it.

Courtney looked away from Adore’s sympathetic expression, those hazel eyes so full of concern that they’d make her burst into tears if she looked at them a second longer, took a deep breath and turned towards the dance floor, sighing. “Why are those lights out?”

“What lights?” Roy asked.

“Those!” Courtney pointed to a string of fairy lights that were out, near the dance floor.

“They probably came unplugged. I’ll go check.”

Courtney followed him over to the dance floor, looking around, tapping her foot. “Nobody is dancing. Tomas, can’t you play something more fun? Where’s the playlist I gave you?” She crossed her arms.

“Yeah, sure. I was just trying to keep it kind of chill while people finished dinner. We can kick things up.” The DJ winked at her and opened his laptop.

Darienne walked up and asked, “Hey, babe, do you still want to try and save some of the enchiladas, ‘cause they’re almost gone…”

“WHAT?! We were supposed to save a whole tray in the kitchen to bring to the shelter tomorrow! Who put it out?!” Courtney demanded.

“I don’t know, I’m sure it was an innocent--oh, no...”

“What?”

“It looks like you’re missing an earring,” Darienne said, touching her cheek softly.

“What?!” Courtney cried, panicking.

“Yeah, hold still, it’s probably just somewhere on your dress. Dela, come here, help me for a sec.”

Courtney stood, wringing her hands, as the two girls searched the folds of her skirt. “I can’t lose that earring, I borrowed it from my mom, it belonged to my great-grandmother, oh god, you have to find it, please hurry.” She began to whimper, covering her face, as Grandma Muriel approached.

“Why do you look so distressed, dear?”

“Grandma, I’m sorry, I’m so sorry!” she wailed, grasping the older woman’s hands. “I think I lost Nana’s earring, it must be around here somewhere but I don’t know if we can find it and--”

“Courtney, for heaven’s sake, get ahold of yourself.” Muriel shook her head, walking away.

“Just stop, it’s no use…” Courtney shook Dela off her skirt. “It’s too dark. We’ll never find it.”

“But maybe we can--”

“I said leave it!”

“Okay, sorry.” Dela exchanged a look with Darienne and backed off. “I’m gonna go get some more punch…”

“Uh, Court, I think one of the bulbs in that string burned out, they aren’t working,” Roy said.

“Ugh! Great!”

Suddenly, the cheerleaders stormed the dance floor as Missy Elliott’s “I’m Really Hot” began blasting.

Courtney nodded at Tomas, who winked, and then was pulled into a group of squealing girls by Laganja. That’s when she noticed the red flower on Alyssa’s dress. “Really, Alyssa? You of all people can’t follow a dress code?”

“Step off, Jenek.”

“Excuse me?”

“I’m one of the few people here who doesn’t find your diva nonsense charming. I’m not the one. So step. Off. If you know what’s good for you.”

Some of the cheerleaders paused, taking notice of the two girls standing in the middle of the dance floor.

Bob's hand tightened around April’s as he tried to subtly nod in Alyssa and Courtney's direction.

“Five bucks on Alyssa,” he whispered, causing April to snort.

“You're terrible. Alyssa won't do anything but make her run extra laps at cheer practice or something. She's all talk,” April murmured, eyes watching the two girls.

“I don't know, Alyssa has about 20 pounds on Courtney. She could definitely take her.” Bob shrugged his shoulders, pulling April closer as he waited to see what would happen, April’s cheeks reddening.

After staring each other down, Courtney turned on her heel and flounced away, nearly bumping into her mother.

“Hey, love, did you want to do the cake now, or wait a little?” Karen said. “I think people are mostly done with dinner, so--”

“I don’t care!” Courtney snapped. “Whatever.”

“Well, it’s your party, Courtney, so I think you should--”

“Fine! Do it now! It’s not like it fucking matters, mom, it’s just a stupid cake!” Tears burned in her eyes.

Karen looked at her like she was debating whether to smack her across the face or give her a hug. After a few moments, she spoke in a quiet voice. “I’ll go get the candles.”

“Great.” Courtney bit her lip, holding back tears.

Roy took a step towards her. “Courtney, everyone is doing their best, okay? I mean, I know you’re upset about your dad, but that’s no reason to act like a bitch to everyone who’s here, who’s trying to--.”

Courtney narrowed her eyes at him, pushing him away. “This is not about my fucking dad, Roy!”

He rolled his eyes. “Okay, babe, whatever you say.”

“Go fuck yourself!” Courtney screeched, shoving him out of the way and storming off the dance floor.

Roy stood for a moment, helpless, knowing he’d done the wrong thing, as “1, 2 Step” began blaring over the speakers, the bass pumping, the dance floor filling up even more, suddenly feeling stifling.

“Good work, bro,” Adore said, thumping him on the shoulder.

“Fuck. I don’t know where she went…” He shook his head.

“I know where she went,” Adore assured him. “Maybe let’s not light any candles yet, though?”

Roy nodded.

-

Adore climbed the ladder, hoisting herself into the tree house and sitting cross-legged on the floor. “Hey.”

Courtney wiped some tears from her cheeks.

“Hi.” She was curled in the corner, in a beanbag chair. Her tiara was askew and her gown was wrinkled, the tulle bunched up around her like a glittery fuchsia cloud.

“Planning to hide in here for the rest of the night?”

Sniffling, Courtney shrugged. “Maybe.”

“Alright.” Adore shoved the second beanbag chair over to her and stretched out. “In that case, I’m sort of bummed I didn’t bring any snacks, but I guess we’ll live.”

Courtney giggled a little in spite of herself, then sniffled as her tears continued to fall.

“I know I’m being awful. Roy was right.”

“Yeah, well, Roy’s always right, isn’t he? That doesn’t mean he needed to say it.”

Courtney closed her eyes.

“I hate that I care this much. I feel like such a stupid fucking baby. But...it’s my first birthday without him, you know?”

Adore nodded, silently taking her hand.

“I just really thought he’d come. I really thought, even though things have been weird and everything, that when it came down to it, I’d still be able to count on him. That he still gave half a shit. I’m so dumb.” She shook her head, tears pouring down her cheeks.

Adore brushed the tears away gently with her fingers, whispering. “You’re not dumb.”

Courtney leaned on Adore’s shoulder. “I even had a song picked out for us to dance to.”

“What song?”

“You Are My Sunshine.”

“Dude. That is so cheesy.”

“I know! That’s the point!” Courtney laughed, fresh tears falling.

“Well...it’s his loss, because you are sunshine. And you’ve never looked prettier.”

Courtney smiled, knowing that she was, at the moment, a tear-stained mess. “Thank you for lying.”

Adore took the edge of a blanket and dried Courtney’s cheeks, then opened her handbag and pulled out a compact, eyeliner, and lip gloss. She got to work fixing Courtney’s makeup and within two minutes, leaned back, pleased with her work. “There,” Adore said, adjusting the tiara on her head, rearranging her blonde curls. “Beautiful.”

“You are, too,” Courtney said softly, gazing up at her.

Adore looked at Courtney and, for a moment, it was if she could really see her. Every insecurity, every desire. She took Courtney’s face in her hands and tilted her chin up. She leaned in slowly and brushed their lips together.

Courtney’s heart raced as she savored the sweet softness of Adore’s mouth. She gripped the tulle fabric of her skirt in her hands, and then before she could blink, the kiss was over and Adore was pulling away again, still looking at her but not in the same way. The walls were back up and it felt as if a chasm had opened up between them.

“I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have--” Adore’s voice was hoarse and distant.

“No, it’s alr--”

“We should go back.”

“Okay.” Courtney felt like crying again, and she wasn’t sure why. She just followed Adore, out of the tree house and back to the party.

-

The good news was, the DJ had managed to keep the party going. It seemed like most people hadn’t even noticed that Courtney left, from how much fun they were having on the dance floor. Except Roy, of course, sitting at their table, sipping forlornly out of a pink sparkly cup.

She approached him, nervously biting her lip, adjusting her elbow-length gloves. “Hey.”

He looked up. “Hi.”

“I’m sorry. I know I’ve been a monster all day, and you’ve been really great, like you always are, just the best, and, and you were right, I was upset about my dad, and I’m just...I’m sorry.” Courtney pressed her lips together, trying to hold in her tears. “Please don’t be mad.”

Roy stood up and wrapped his arms around her.

“I’m sorry too. I didn’t mean to upset you. But like, this is a birthday party and you’ve been so stressed and irritated, and I just thought--”

“I know, I know.”

“This is probably a totally insane idea, but what if we...keep an open mind here, this is crazy, but...what if we try to have fun for the rest of the night?” He raised his eyebrows suggestively. “Huh...huh?”

Courtney laughed, pulling him in for another hug. “You’re so lame. I love you.”

“Me too, baby.”

“Do you wanna dance?”

Roy put his hand over his heart. “I would love to, but I don’t know that Spice Girls choreography.”

Courtney giggled and pulled him onto the dance floor. “Don’t taunt me, Del Rio, or I’ll make you learn. Dela’s leaving again Monday, and I think you’d be a really cute Sporty.”

“She is the butch one.”

“Good point. Maybe you should be Posh.”

Roy laughed and put his arms around her as the DJ switched to Usher and Alicia Keys singing “My Boo.” Courtney leaned her head on his shoulder, and sighed, glancing around the dance floor. She caught Adore’s eye and smiled at her. Adore raised a pink sparkly cup at her, holding her gaze for a long moment until Willam thumped her on the shoulder to get her attention back.

Courtney looked back at Roy, who flashed his dimples at her and kissed her softly. She felt a stab of guilt, remembering the other kiss she’d gotten that night. But, it didn’t mean anything, right? It was just a friendly kiss, her best friend trying to make her feel better.

She closed her eyes, insides twisting, stomach in knots. Because if she was really honest with herself, it wasn’t the kiss that she felt guilty about. It was that feeling, the moment Adore pulled away, of regret. She dug her fingers into Roy’s shoulders, and he held her tighter around the waist.

Suddenly, she couldn’t stop the tears and she was crying again. Roy cupped her face and kissed her cheeks. “What’s the matter, babe?”

Courtney shook her head.

“One of those ‘it’s my party, I’ll cry if I want to’ moments? Should I just leave it alone?” Roy asked.

Courtney nodded as Roy swiped a napkin from the dessert table and dried her eyes.

“Alright. Come here.” He pulled her close and she fell into his arms, unable to tear her eyes away from where Adore stood with Willam and Pearl, deep in thought.

Adore stirred her punch with a straw as she half-listened to whatever Willam was running his mouth about. She couldn’t believe that she had kissed Courtney, especially in the emotional state that the blonde had been in, but in that moment it had felt so right and that’s what made it all the more wrong.

Adore was a slave to her feelings, and it felt like the more she tried to run from them, the more intense and reckless they became when they caught up to her.

That’s the moment when the lights suddenly cut out and Karen wheeled in the giant birthday cake, decorated with a huge fuchsia bow, black and white stripes, and shiny silver stars. Everyone gathered around the birthday girl to sing, and Adore focused on the sparkler candles, glittering in the darkness.

Goosebumps rose on the back of her neck, the feeling of someone’s eyes on her pulling Adore from her thoughts.

Hazel eyes looked up to find bright green eyes staring back at her. Adore grew anxious, unable to interrupt the emotions behind Courtney’s piercing stare.

Adore wondered if she had fucked up and Courtney was mad at her or even worse, if Courtney knew Adore had feelings for her that she shouldn’t have.

Adore looked away, her chest growing tight as a million thoughts ran through her head.

Courtney continued to gaze at her best friend, unable to focus on the crowd, on her mother and everyone urging her to blow out the candles.

“Babe, make a wish…” Roy said, kissing her temple.

Courtney bit her lip, eyes falling closed as she blew out the candles, not daring to let herself form a coherent thought in that moment. Because if she did, she was afraid of what she might wish for. She opened her eyes back up, and everyone was cheering, while Kimmy began to slice up the cake.

Roy swept her up into his arms again while the lights turned back on and Tomas turned up the music, Beyoncé‘s “Baby Boy.”

Pearl handed a piece of cake to Adore, taking one for herself too. “Dude, let’s go ask the DJ to play ‘American Life.’”

“That song where Madonna raps about her household staff?” Willam asked skeptically.

“Yeah! It’s so good!”

“That’s fucking embarrassing, New Girl.”

“Adore, come on, back me up here! I mean, or ‘Hollywood’ is good too…” she mused.

“I think I’m gonna take off,” Adore murmured, setting her cup down and pulling her phone out of her back pocket, sending a text to Raja asking if she could get a ride so that they could hang out.

-

As the song finished, Courtney lifted her head from Roy’s shoulder, smiling at him. “Thank you,” she said, reaching up and touching his cheek with her gloved hand.

“Anytime,” he replied, flashing those killer dimples at her.

Courtney glanced over to where Adore had been standing, feeling an urge to clear the air, just to make sure everything was okay, but she was gone. She excused herself from Roy, leaving him with Darienne and Dela, and hurried over. To her dismay, Willam and Pearl both reported that they thought Adore had left, and so she tore through the backyard to Adore’s house, shouting her name, finding her leaning on the side of her garage.

Her pounding heart began to slow down as she caught her breath.

“Hi...sorry for yelling, I just…”

“No, it’s okay. Are you alright?” Adore asked.

“Yeah. Um…” Courtney licked her lips, adjusting her gloves awkwardly. “Willam said you left, and I just wanted to find you so I could...I wanted to say thank you. For...for the bracelet. And...everything.” Courtney took another step towards her, eyes soft and misty.

“You’re welcome. Happy birthday.” Adore’s own eyes still had the same inscrutable, slightly guarded expression they’d had earlier. But her smile was genuine.

Courtney wrapped her arms around Adore’s shoulders, burying her face into her friend’s neck and hugging her tightly.

“I love you, Dory.”

Adore closed her eyes, holding her close, trying not to be hyper-aware of the warm breath against her skin, the scent of her silky hair, the all too recent memory of the taste of her.

Her chest rose and fell rapidly. As if by some miracle, they were suddenly blinded by headlights as Raja’s car pulled into the driveway. Adore broke away from the hug, waving gratefully to her.

“Um, that’s my...I gotta go,” she told Courtney, who simply nodded. “Goodnight. The party was awesome. And I love you too!” She blew a kiss as she slipped into the car.

Raja tossed a cigarette out the window as she pulled out of the driveway.

“Hey.”

“Hi.”

“Glad you texted.”

“Me too. I had to get out of there.”

“Not into the quinceanera fantasy?” Raja laughed.

Adore shook her head. “Been a long day.”

“Stressful?”

Adore looked over to Raja, the streetlights illuminating her features.

“Yeah,” Adore said, voice only slightly above a whisper, eyes flickering to Raja’s lips.

Pulling up to the stop sign at the end of the street Raja put the car in park, turning to face Adore.

“Well, we all do it. Have a big princess-like party; if we don’t want it our mom’s ‘ll make us,” Raja said lowly, leaning on the armrest.

“Really?” Adore asked, leaning on towards Raja, “Did you?”

“Mhm,” Raja smirked, eyes flickering to Adore’s lips, “My ma made sure that I had an extraaaavagant birthday party. I had a big turquoise dress, my hair done up, the works.”

Adore let out a breathy giggle, “You don’t look the type.”

“No?” Raja raised her eyebrows, slightly tilting her head and Raja’s warm breath hitting Adore’s face made Adore notice that they were closer than she realized. Lips inches apart.

“No.”

“Maybe when we get to my place…” Raja placed a sweet kiss on Adore’s lips-- that had her chasing Raja’s lips as she pulled away, “I can show you some pictures.”

Raja smiled innocently, but Adore wouldn’t let her get away. She needed to forget what happened earlier; she needed to forget her mistake, the way nothing seemed to matter, but them in the tree house. Adore leaned over the armrest, pulling Raja back towards her, pressing her lips into Raja’s harder than the first kiss, desperate to erase the way Courtney’s lips felt against hers. Raja could do that, Raja could make her forget and when the older girl nipped at her lip, Adore let her in.

The position was awkward with the armrest pressed between them, but the feel of Raja’s hands on her, tugging her closer was worth it. Adore gripped at Raja’s jacket, when they broke for air, Raja leaving kisses along Adore’s jaw before Adore guided Raja’s lips back to hers.

Before the kiss could deepen again the girls were scared apart by a horn beeping behind them. They looked up, both startled, as a car sped around them, the driver tossing them the finger.

“Damn, bro, calm down,” Raja said, and Adore giggled, arms sliding back around her neck.

“Come back here…”

[elrondsscribe]

No ATLA shipping wars, please. There is room for ALL the ships.

So I’m sure anyone who’s been tracking me lately knows that I’ve been all up in Avatar: The Last Airbender ...

And I must say, after checking out the tags, I am TERRIFIED to speak my mind about ANY of the ships I like!! Like, I don’t want to be thought of as a poisonous Supporter Of That Which Is Toxic And Problematic because I did or didn’t gel with one ship or other. Spoilers under the cut.

See, I’m always the kind of fan that nobody likes: I’m the MCU fan that appreciates Steve and Tony; I’m the Star Wars fan that loved all nine Episodes. So when I say that I sail literally all of the ships because all of them hit me in different kinds of feels, well, y’all know to expect this from me.

(I should say at this point that the only thing I’m considering ‘canon’ for the purposes of this conversation is A:TLA; no LoK or comics is relevant here.)

(Also, can I just say what a wonderful change of pace it is to be in a property where, at least in the generation of our ‘mains,’ there seem to be more named, developed female characters??)

So I’m gonna start out with saying: I like the canon pairings as they stand! Kataang, Sukki, and Maiko being the main ones, obvs. However, I also like all kinds of AU pairings too!

Like Zutara - I mean, I can hardly say anything here that ten thousand others haven’t already said better, but their journeys do parallel each other in a lot of significant ways, and I think that, by the end of the show, they do legitimately share enough to have the foundations of a good relationship, if as a fanwriter you wanted to go there. You could make much of the poetry of their differences (”you rise with the moon, and I with the Sun”), and/or really develop their existing ability to safely be the ‘splash zone’ for each other’s turmoil. Besides, I think Katara’s mothering fussbudget energy would be a great thing for Zuko, and there’s a gentleness to her that he’d find healing.

{Now, I’ve seen a lot of comparisons between Zutara and Reylo, made by people who either want to demean or defend both ships. I’ve also seen these comparisons soundly trashed by people who like one, but not both, of these ships. As someone who never has had strong feelings either for or against Reylo, and as someone who loves Zutara but not exclusively, my response to all of that drama is a big old shrug of my shoulders. So don’t come at me screaming about Reylo, either to stan or cancel. Please just don’t.}

Also I don’t know a good way to say this, but you know how some people just can’t seem to resist reading Zuko and/or Sokka as gay? Well, I can’t stop reading Mai as lesbian; I don’t know why.

I don’t know which pairing Taang is. If it’s Aang/Ty Lee, omg yes!! Kill me with all the sparkles and rainbows! I already want to eat them both up. More seriously, I think Aang’s peaceable temperament would be a really welcome change in her life, after Zuko’s turmoil and Mai’s ice and Azula’s, well, Azula-ness. She’d probably just love Aang’s aura :) 

If Taang is Aang/Toph, well, we’ve observed that our flighty lil’ Aangster could use a grouding influence :) I don’t know who on Tumblr pointed it out, but Toph is the last person in the world to fangirl over Aang, which seems to be very good for him, while also not clipping his wings. While I do believe they’d be the kind of couple to quarrel and, at times, drift apart from each other (she’s incredibly rooted while he’s the embodiment of a free-spirit), for some reason I can easily see them finding each other again. There’s a scene in my head, one where an adult Aang is faced with the necessity of a sacrifice play that he might not come back from, and instead of tearfully trying to convince him not to do it, Toph says, “Go get ‘em, Twinkletoes.”

[And if you ship Zutara alongside Aang/Toph, you could have a fanfic where you did a Parallel, with Two Ships Of Opposite-Power-Benders. I’d be a fan!]

Now I’ve seen Sokkla floating around too, and I must say that this intrigues me, especially the way that this ship is connected to ideas about the redemption of Azula. I’ve seen some people being really upset that Azula never got a redemption arc in the show, but c’mon guys. A redemption arc for Azula would have taken a long-ass time - it would’ve been awesome, but it would’ve taken a long-ass time, definitely longer than a fourth season, I think. But if you were going to go with a combination of a redemption arc and a ship for her, Sokka would be a great idea. I don’t think Azula knows what fun and merriment are, and who knows those things better than Sokka?

[Honestly, that’s the thing about shipping Sokka with anyone: he would bring them laughter.]

But enough about the het AU ships, let’s talk about the gay ones!

Zukka would be the most prominent example, of course. The rapport that Zuko develops with Sokka over ‘The Boiling Rock’ is beautiful to behold (jokes about ‘that’s rough, buddy’ aside), and heaven knows Zuko needs someone to teach him how to laugh.

And remember how I said that I somehow can’t see Mai as straight? Well, I also can’t stop shipping her with Azula (don’t know the ship name for this one, but I know it exists). Obviously this ship would have more than an edge of ownership and manipulation about it, but they’re so deadly radiant and it’s like I can’t look away from them.

And Ty Lee is just so adorable and sincere (even with all the buried sadness) that shipping her with almost any of the other girls just makes my heart melt. Especially Katara, who would just cuddle the hell out of her whenever she’s feeling down. Or even Azula, who would totally own and work her but also, like, dazzle her. Main exception being Suki - for some reason, my head goes all kinds of hot, dirty places when I imagine Suki and Ty Lee sparring.

However, all this being said, I still have love for the canon ships that we got.

For example, like I said, I do ship Kataang, and I think together they’re incredibly sweet, but I also think that Katara’s tendency to hover and Aang’s tendency to (literally and metaphorically) fly away from/float above problems would jointly become a not-inconsiderable hurdle in a long-term relationship. Now I’ve observed couples in real life with similar dynamics, and I’ll stick out my neck and say that I consider this a workable hurdle, especially if both Katara and Aang grow in maturity and interpersonal understanding as they get older.

Similarly with Maiko: we see that, where Zuko’s emotions tend to run fire-hot, Mai’s tend to run ice-cold; we saw a clear example of these tendencies really clashing with each other. And Mai’s way of showing Zuko affection does seem to have genuinely perplexed some people who watched the show, to the point that they didn’t read it as affection at all. But again, drawing on what I’be observed, some couples really do develop a ‘love code’ that they understand even if literally no one else does. I don’t see any indication of either Mai or Zuko actually ill-using the other; and I will always stan this line from Mai when she made her big choice: I love Zuko more than I fear you.

As for Sukki - well, you already know. Sokka definitely grew and healed a lot from it, but I don’t think the trauma of being unable to protect Yue is one that will ever truly leave him. And as much as Suki understands him, I do think Sokka’s protectiveness will sometimes grate on her. She’s a motherfucking warrior-chieftain. And yes, this can definitely shape into a relational problem, but not one that can’t be worked around.

So ... TLDR, I love all the ships, and refuse to be part of the anti drama.

[writing-for-amusement]

Commission for Confidence, 10

Summary:  Y/N has been struggling with her self-esteem for years. After incessant pushing from your best friend, Y/N decides to commission an artist to draw her, expecting everything to happen via Internet. However, when your phone is stolen, you try to cancel the commission, but Peter Parker has other ideas. He quickly becomes enraptured by you, and a friendship forms easily. Will it lead to something more? Or will your past fears get in the way?

A/N: ALRIGHT Y’ALL, HERE IT IS. Omg, I feel like it has been FOREVER since I updated this fic, and I feel so bad!! However, I know it’s because I was working on other stuff, and stuff with life has popped up. I hope you guys like this chapter, I am relatively happy with it. After this one, I’m gonna do a little time skip. It might be a bit before that, though, because I want to do some of the requests I’ve gotten!! Enjoy this chapter and let me know what you think! There’s also some conversing in sign language and I hope I wrote it in a good way! I know that when you’re actually signing a conversation, there are a lot of little filler words that get cut out because that’s obviously the nature of the language, but I wrote the signing as it was meant to be interpreted. Please give me some feedback on how I wrote it if you can, I just want to write well!!!

You can still get on any of my taglists, including my permanent one! If your username has a strikethrough, it means it isn’t working

Permanent Taglist: @pparkerwrites, @jordyns-library, @natblidaclexa, @peterseuphoria, @lesbian-x-blackwidow, @beccaboo929, @softrdj, @icecoldban, @paintballkid711

CFC Taglist: @scatterbrainedgenius, @wildfirecracker, @pastlives-purplesouls, @maybemona, @hotchocolattee, @heregoestheworld, @willowtree42095, @134340-cm, @this-is-just-for-fanfic-lmao, @poc-gotbang, @sincerelygmg, @toastedpopsicles, @imstupidsblog, @casual-vaporwave, @xfangirl-trashx

Word Count: 4855

Warnings: fluff, Monopoly related anger, some nerves and anxiety, mostly just fluff I think???, some mention of pain pills, swearing lmao, minor self esteem issues but barely there, legit it’s mostly fluff

You woke up to your alarm and groggily pressed snooze. After pressing snooze twice, you sat up with muscles that protested, but nowhere near as loudly as they had that morning. The TV was asking if you were still watching, so you pressed the yes button and stood up.

Checking your phone, you padded to the kitchen and turned on the electric kettle again. There were a few messages, to your surprise.

Monica had texted you multiple times, demanding to know how you were and why you weren’t responding. You realized with a wince that you’d forgotten to tell her about the entire incident the previous day.

The other messages were from Peter, asking you about your snack preferences. They were more recent, thankfully, so you replied to those first.

As you crossed to your room and debated what clothes to wear, you called your best friend. You were unsurprised when she answered on the first ring.

“What the fuck, Y/N?” she demanded immediately.

“Listen, Monica—”

“No, no, you listen!” she interrupted you. “I was scrolling through some apps last night, and I saw a news clip of Spider-Man, and there you were! You were right there! And I saw you afterward, covered in cuts and bits of glass! What the fuck happened?”

You sighed and gave a quick overview, knowing that Monica was squeamish when it involved injuries. She started squealing with excitement as you told her that Peter came to keep you company, and that he made dinner for you. When you told her that you needed her help picking an outfit for game night, Monica was immediately facetiming you.

“What are we looking at?” Monica demanded as your face appeared.

“A casual night, meeting his aunt and best friend,” you explained. “We gotta go quick, though, because I really want a shower. Like, I think it’ll make my body feel so much better.”

“Of course. What about that Spider-Man shirt you have? And some leggings, that one black pair that you totally rock.”

“But that’s a crop top,” you argued quietly. “Not much of one, but it is…”

“Do it, you rock that shirt,” Monica encouraged you. “Besides, it’s casual, you’ll fit in perfectly! And, if I remember correctly, it’s a super comfy shirt.”

“Of course, you remember correctly,” you chuckled as you pulled it out, “you bought it for me, remember?”

“I do,” she beamed at you.

“Okay, love, I’m gonna get in the shower. I’ve got it from here.”

“Alright, hot stuff,” Monica winked, “don’t do anything I wouldn’t do.”

You raised a brow at her, causing her to cackle and quickly blow a kiss to you through the screen. With a quick goodbye, she hung up.

The hot water from the shower was amazing. It made everything feel just a little bit better, the muscles in your body nearly melting upon first water contact.

After one of the best showers you ever had, you dried off and inspected your bandages. You were thankful that you had plenty of bandages, because you felt a bit more comfortable with clean bandages on your cuts. There were only a few that looked like they were still a bit oozy.

You got dressed, incredibly happy that your muscles were arguing less, and put on just a little bit of mascara. Then, after making sure you had everything, you slipped your shoes on and began your walk to Peter’s apartment. He didn’t live super far away, and you realized as you checked your phone that you were thirty minutes early.

Instead of going into the building, you continued past it and into the flower shop right next door. You adored that flower shop; they always had the nicest and freshest blooms for the season. And their prices were very fair. You’d been visiting the shop since you moved to the city; at first you’d wandered upon it, but then you made some fast friends.

You waved to Sofia, the owner, and signed, “Hello, Sofia. How are you?”

“Great! Business is great,” she signed back, giving you the brightest grin. “What do you need today?” Suddenly, her eyes zoned in on the bandages on your arm and face. “What the hell happened to you?”

“Just a small incident with some broken glass. I’m fine, I promise. It doesn’t even hurt. I need something for a friend’s aunt,” you explained. “She’s like a mother to him. I’m thinking something not too big, with bright colors. Maybe some tulips and daffodils?”

“Okay, well, as long as you’re okay. Tell me, what’s she like?"

You paused for a moment, trying to think about what you could say. “I haven’t met her,” you signed, “but I’ve heard only good things.”

“What’s her kid like?” Sofia asked. “Name?”

You quickly spelt Peter’s name with your fingers and Sofia grinned. “Oh, is he nice?”

“He’s very sweet,” you informed her, “almost like candy.”

Sofia wiggled her eyebrows at you and held up a finger to pause the conversation. You waited patiently as she walked farther into her shop, obviously on a mission for the bouquet she had in mind. After she didn’t show up for another two minutes, you turned and began to admire the day-old bouquets behind you.

You turned back as Sofia approached with a simple bouquet in her hands. There were orange tulips and yellow daffodils, arranged artfully. Without asking, Sofia put them in a simple vase with a bit of water; she tied a yellow bow around it and showed it to you with pride shining in her eyes.

“It’s perfect!” you cheered, emphatically signing your admiration and appreciation. “You are so talented, Sofia!”

She waved you off playfully, a grin on her lips. “I hope they all like them.”

You paid the woman, noting that she knocked the price down for you; you shoved a twenty-dollar bill in her tip jar when her back was turned. Sofia handed you the receipt and gave you a sly smile.

“Tell me about Peter,” she urged, raising an eyebrow.

“He’s really sweet, an artist,” you explained. At her look, you cut her off. “He’s just a friend, Sofia. I’m about to go over to his game night with his roommate and aunt.”

“That sounds like fun. Is he cute, do you like him?”

Your eyes went wide at her blunt question and her laughter made it obvious that she already knew the answer. “He’s a wonderful person,” you informed her, trying not to give more away. Sofia could always see through anything, though.

“You like him,” she signed with a wicked grin. “You do!”

“He’s my friend!” you protested, rolling your eyes. “Speaking of Peter, I need to get going to game night.”

“Fine, fine, I hope you get some!” Sofia signed quickly.

Your blood rushed at her words. Instead of gracing her with a response, you stuck your tongue out at her and bid her a goodbye. Her laughter followed you out of the shop.

You bustled to the apartment building next door, holding the flowers close to your nose. They smelt divine.

The person in the lobby recognized you and gave you a wide smile. You waved at him and went straight to the elevator. It was a smooth ride up, and as you adjusted your arm, you felt a twinge of pain. Perhaps you should’ve taken some ibuprofen before you left…

You got off the elevator and walked to Peter’s door. You were ten minutes early, but that was okay. After going through a mental checklist, you nodded to yourself and finally knocked on the door. There was an urge to rock on your feet to get your nerves out, but you managed to curb that urge.

The door opened and you were met with Peter, a breathless smile on his face; as he looked at your shirt, he blushed bright red. Right behind him were two people, each peering around the man to get a look. You found yourself essentially giggling with mirth at the sight of two heads crowding in with Peter’s, nearly pushing the man over. It was downright hilarious to you, and you had to turn away from the door to try to quiet your chortling.

“I’m sorry,” you finally managed to get out, constantly interrupted by your own giggles, “I’m sorry, it’s just so funny, you’re all smushed together like that!”

Peter started chuckling with you, and after another minute, you turned back around. He was still at the door, the most adorable smile on his face, the blush still prominent (you had no idea why he was blushing, but it was super cute). The people that had been behind him were gone, but you could hear them talking in the apartment.

“Sorry,” you chuckled lightly.

“Hey, I love your laugh, so please, laugh away,” he grinned at you.

Your blood seemed to sing as you finally followed him in. Standing by the dining room table was a woman, one you assumed was May Parker.

“Y/N,” Peter began, “this is my Aunt May. And in the kitchen is Ned.”

“It’s nice to meet you,” you smiled a bit shyly at the woman. You held the flowers out. “I had some extra time before coming here, so I got you these flowers. I hope you like them. I-I know it might be a little weird, but I’m very fond of your nephew, and he speaks so highly of you. Besides, surprise flowers are nice,” you explained nervously.

“Thank you so much!” May beamed at you, coming forward and taking the vase from your hands. She wrapped one arm around you in a surprise hug and then kissed your cheek. When she pulled back, her smile was wider, and she sniffed the flowers. “Peter was right when he said you’re a sweet woman.”

You blood warmed slightly and you shifted on your feet. “Peter is really sweet, too.”

“I know, such a good kid,” May said adoringly. “Well, are you ready for game night?”

“Just how intense is it supposed to get?” you asked with a grin.

“Depends on how much you can handle.”

“What are we playing?”

“Thought we’d start with Monopoly.”

Your grin widened. “Oh yeah, I can definitely handle that intensity.”

“A girl after my own heart. By the way, I love your shirt, it’s super cute and on-brand for this family,” May told you as she wrapped her arm around your shoulder and steered you to the dining room table, where the game was already set up.

 “I swear to fucking god, Peter, if you put another hotel there, I will flip this table!” Ned was yelling ninety minutes later.

“What about you, buying all utilities?” Peter shot back, his eyes full of fire.

“It’s only because Y/N bought all the airports!”

“That’s how the game works!” you and May joined in simultaneously.

“You’re just jealous that I got all the red spaces!” Peter yelled to Ned.

“Because you know I love the red spaces!” Ned shouted.

“That’s why I got them! Payback, bitch!”

“Oh, so this is payback for the time I decided to play as the dog because you were running late again?”

“Yes!”

You glanced at May and erupted into laughter. Despite the semi-harsh words being said, you could see the amusement in both men’s eyes and the smiles on their faces. It was, all in all, incredibly amusing. The energy of the room was electric and warm, incredibly comforting in an unusual but not unwelcome way.

Ned and Peter stopped arguing as they heard your laughter. You were leaning back in your chair, your head tilted and your hand on your chest as you tried to calm your cackling. May joined in, and soon, so did Peter and Ned.

“I think I have a solution,” you informed them as your laughter sobered.

“Let me hear it,” Ned and Peter said simultaneously.

You grinned at them before quickly flipping the board over. Everything went flying and you immediately dissolved back into laughter at everyone’s shocked faces. Their mouths remained open and you continued to laugh as you cleaned up the board and put everything back in the box. The laughter had devolved into chuckles when May began to help you put stuff away, a bright smile on her face.

“I like you, Y/N. You fit right in,” she said frankly.

You smiled sheepishly as you organized the money.

When you turned to look at Ned and Peter, they were both turned away from the table, whispering to each other and glancing over their shoulders. As you raised an eyebrow at Peter, he immediately turned red and jerked his head back.

With a shrug, you discussed what movie to watch with May. You both agreed that it was probably a good idea to put a movie on and play a different game. May was suggesting Cards Against Humanity, and you were seriously considering it. Of course, you were also weighing in the possibilities for total embarrassment with that particular game.

“Oh, what the hell, let’s do it!” you beamed, finding May’s cheer adorable.

Ned and Peter were still whispering while you helped May transfer all cups and food to the coffee table in the living room. You were setting everything up and they were still whispering as May put on Weird Science.

“Truly one of the great classics, May,” you informed her with an approving nod.

May nodded at you before giving you a pointed glance towards the boys. You gave a tiny nod of confirmation and walked over to them.

“Guys,” you stated loudly behind them, making Ned jump in surprise. “C’mon, it’s time for Cards Against Humanity and Weird Science. Wanna make some popcorn?”

“S-sure,” Peter stuttered, his ears and cheeks bright red.

“What’s got you two all worked in a bunch?” you asked gently.

“I, um, I have to run into the office really quick,” Peter admitted in a rush.

“Oh,” you blinked in surprise. “Um, okay? Is that what you’ve been discussing?”

“Y-yeah,” Peter admitted, his blush getting deeper.

“Are you worried about me?” you asked gently.

“I just, it would be rude—”

“Hey, Peter, it’s okay,” you interrupted him tenderly. “Emergencies happen. It’s totally cool with me. Besides, I like Ned, and I’m ready to win all of May’s love for all eternity.” You leaned forward slightly and pretended to whisper, “I’m gonna be her favorite, Peter; I’m gunning for your spot.”

Peter and Ned laughed loudly at that before Peter jogged to his room to get something he needed for the office. Ned rushed to the kitchen to make some popcorn while you went to sit on the couch with May.

“So, May, Peter has to go to the office for some sort of emergency,” you informed the woman as you plopped onto the couch next to her.

“That happens a lot,” May shrugged a shoulder. “And you can call me Aunt May, Y/N. After all this stuff tonight, I’m pretty sure you’re one of mine now.”

You laughed brightly, trying to calm the excitement that coursed through your veins. It had been awhile since you had that sort of motherly affection, and you didn’t quite know what to do about it. But you decided that you would roll with it.

“Okay, gotta go, see you in a bit, bye!” Peter’s voice flashed by you as he ran to the front door and left loudly.

“That was… weird,” you muttered under your breath. “Figured he’d actually, y’know, face us to say goodbye.”

“Oh, he gets like that when there’s an emergency,” Aunt May explained casually.

“Y-yeah, sometimes he doesn’t even go out the door, he goes down the fire escape,” Ned said almost… nervously.

As you watched the movie and casually played Cards Against Humanity, occasionally taking photos of the really good plays to show Peter when he returned, you found yourself getting really comfortable with the other two people. When the movie was over, Aunt May popped in another comedy, White Chicks.

About halfway through the movie, Aunt May decided to call it a night. She gave you a warm hug and a squeeze, telling you to wear the Spider-Man shirt more often with a wink. She gave Ned a squeeze and told either of you to give Peter a hug when he came back from the office. With another wave over her shoulder, Aunt May left.

Luckily, it wasn’t awkward with just Ned. You talked about both your jobs and your shared love of science fiction as the movie played. Ned even told you a few funny Peter stories that you soaked up with a vigor. When White Chicks was over, Ned decided to pop one more movie in while waiting for Peter (he picked Airplane).

You found yourself nodding off slightly while the movie was playing. Between the worlds of awake and asleep, you stretched out on the couch a bit more. It was an incredibly comfortable couch, obviously easy to fall asleep on.

Not even halfway through Airplane, Ned saw that you were sleeping peacefully. He figured that were still tired from the previous day, so he turned down the volume of the TV. After draping a blanket over your sleeping form, he went to bed.

 Peter entered through the living room window cautiously. He could see that the TV was still on, so he didn’t want to alert you if you were still home, but his window had been getting stuck and needed fixing.

Rolling through the window silently, Peter sprang up to see you asleep on the couch. The light from the TV, playing the menu screen for Airplane, was giving you a light blue glow. You looked absolutely fantastic, but you also looked slightly uncomfortable as you used your arm as a pillow.

He took a step to you before remembering that he was still in his suit. Quickly changing into a pair of sweats and a t-shirt, Peter lightly jogged to your sleeping form with a pillow in his hands.

“Y/N,” you heard a gentle voice prodding you awake. “Y/N, wake up.”

Groaning lightly, you managed to open your eyes and push up from your position slightly. To your slight surprise, you saw Peter kneeling next to you. The light from the TV was making him look unfairly attractive, as was that damn tight white t-shirt.

“You’re too cute,” you muttered as you relaxed your arms to lay back down. “’S not fair that you’re so damn attractive,” you continued to mutter. “’S not fair to others that aren’t pretty, people like me.” A yawn stretched your lips and you smacked your lips.

Peter’s light chuckle floated to your ears. “You want a pillow, Y/N?”

You grumbled, making him laugh.

“C’mon, let’s get you more comfortable.”

“Are you comfy?” you mumbled.

“I mean, I’m kneeling on the floor.”

“Are you a comfy person?”

“I-I, I mean, I guess.”

“I’d rather use you than a pillow,” you admitted, still mostly asleep. “It’s cause ya look so comfy and cuddly.”

Peter chuckled again as you settled into your previous position. Your slightly opened eyes saw him biting his lip in thought before he nudged you over. You complied easily, scooting back until your back touched the back of the couch. You mused over the wideness of the couch and lifted slightly so Peter could snake his arm under your head.

He settled in next to you and you nuzzled closer and into his chest. You wrapped your leg over his and let out a small hum of comfort. Peter chuckled and you felt him hesitantly trail his hand down until it rested on your waist. With another hum, you felt yourself fall back into a deep, comfortable sleep.

 You woke up slowly, feeling more rested and comfortable than you had in a long time. The night of sleep had been so nice, in fact, that you really didn’t want to continue to wake up. Still, you knew that you had to wake up eventually, so you opened your eyes.

Peter’s sleeping face was right in front of yours. His curly brown hair was falling across his forehead adorably, and the peaceful look on his face made you want to take a picture. You couldn’t do that, of course, because it wasn’t like you were his girlfriend or an actual artist like he was.

You couldn’t remember exactly what happened after you fell asleep the first time. As you memorized Peter’s sleeping face, you tried to recall how you came into this predicament. Peter’s arms holding you close did not go past you.

You let out a slight sigh and tried to squash the excitement that came when Peter let out a small grumble and tightened his hold on you.

A vague whisper of a memory came into your mind as you couldn’t help but bring your hand up to brush some of Peter’s hair off his forehead.

The memory told you that you’d mumbled some things that you would not have said otherwise. Apparently, sleepy you had much more confidence and a much smaller filter than fully aware and awake you. You felt your blood rush as your boldness from your sleep-induced state came into your living memory.

As you played with Peter’s hair, you decided to not focus on the words you’d uttered. Instead, you focused on the softness of his hair and the smoothness of his skin. He was so peaceful, and your tender, hesitant touches seemed to make him relax even more.

Peter let out a sigh and pulled you ever closer. After another minute, and you tucking your arm back against your body, your gaze was met with Peter’s sleepy brown eyes.

“G’morning,” he murmured, giving you a squeeze. “You’re a really good cuddle buddy. So warm and soft and nice. Smell good too.”

You chuckled lightly before you nudged Peter slightly. “Sorry about last night,” you said quietly. “I didn’t know I’m so… bold when I’m sleepy.”

Peter chuckled sleepily and the breath tickled your skin. “It’s alright,” he sighed happily. “I liked it. And I liked cuddling with you.”

“I did too,” you admitted shyly. “Peter?”

“Hm?”

“I need to use the bathroom.”

Peter let out a dramatic groan before removing his arms and rolling over. He obviously forgot that he was on the couch, because he landed on the floor with a thud. You couldn’t stop the loud laughter that left you as his fluffy curls popped up while Peter glared at you for laughing at his plight.

You climbed over him, still laughing, and hurried to the bathroom. All the liquids you had ingested the night before had caught up with you, and you cursed your past self for causing your present self to have to leave Peter’s cuddles. Then again, you pondered as you washed your hands, you hadn’t expected to spend the night, nor to cuddle with Peter.

If you weren’t so relaxed and still sleepy, you’d probably be freaking out.

When you walked back out, you saw that Peter was sitting on a counter in the kitchen. He was typing on his phone and a pot of coffee was brewing in the kitchen. As you entered the kitchen, you let out a groan of relief at the smell of the coffee.

“You should make that sound more often,” Peter informed you casually as he glanced up from his phone.

Your blood sang through your body and you decided to not comment on that. You texted Monica and told her that you planned on calling her later in the day, and a few minutes later, Peter was handing you a mug of coffee.

“Thanks,” you smiled at him.

“No problem. Thanks for inviting me to cuddle last night,” he smirked lightheartedly at you. “That was the best sleep of my life.”

You chuckled as you made your coffee the way you liked it. “I slept very well, too. Thank you, Peter. And thank you for being so cool about it.”

“Why wouldn’t I be?”

Shrugging a shoulder, you sighed as you took your first sip of coffee. “I don’t know,” you admitted, “just… I don’t know. But I still appreciate it. I don’t always sleep the best, and it really was a nice sleep. So, thanks, Peter.”

“Hey, anytime. I seriously mean that, by the way,” he gave you a pointed look.

You barked out a laugh and nodded. “Okay, I’ll keep that in mind.”

“Good!”

Peter offered you some toast, or a bagel, but you politely declined. At his concerned look, you explained that you weren’t normally hungry right after waking up. You also told him that you needed to get home and take a pain pill to get rid of the little ache you still felt in your body. He pouted but seemed to understand.

After you finished your coffee, you went to the bathroom and your hands through your hair to make sure it didn’t look too crazy for your short walk. Sure, it was NYC, but you didn’t like to stand out. Peter laughed and told you that your hair was fine, but at your sideways teasing glare, he chuckled even more and left you to fix it up.

“Okay, Peter, I’d better get going,” you announced as you entered the living room.

Peter was adorably curled on the couch with a sketchbook in his lap. You pretended to peer around his shoulder to see what he was working on, but he held it to his chest and gave you a fake glare. He relaxed as you chuckled and stood up.

“Okay, well, thank you for having me over,” you said as you walked to the door.

“What are you thanking me now for? I’m walking you home,” Peter chuckled as he followed you to the door.

“Oh, you don’t have to—”

“I’m walking you,” he said in a no-nonsense tone.

You didn’t argue and instead let him lead the way out of his apartment.

The walk to your apartment was brief but nice. The coolness of the morning air was refreshing, and Peter kept up a casual stream of conversation that you eagerly participated in.

Almost too soon, you reached your building and turned to Peter. He grinned at you and shoved his hands in his pockets.

“Thank you, Peter,” you said softly, changing the whole dynamic around you. You felt a bit vulnerable with the shift you caused, but you pushed on. “I had a really great time. It really took my mind off of things, and I really appreciate you inviting me into your life. I feel… honored to have met some of the people most important to you. Thank you.”

Peter’s smile was tender and made your heart dance. “Thank you, Y/N. I’m really happy you got to meet Ned and Aunt May, and that you get along so well with them. I know I had to leave, but I’m really, really glad you had such a great time. Aunt May was texting me and telling me that you’re her favorite now, so… lucky you, I guess,” he pretended to pout.

You laughed and shifted your weight a bit. “She’s a wonderful woman, and she raised a wonderful man. I know you’ll always be her actual favorite, but I’m gonna soak up that title for as long as I can.”

The atmosphere had shifted again, and you felt less vulnerable. Still, you felt good; you didn’t feel guilt at sharing your feelings the way you sometimes did.

“Well, I’d better let you get back to your Saturday,” you announced, wincing internally at the awkwardness of the announcement.

“Y-yeah,” Peter agreed, giving you a smile that perhaps had a tinge of sadness.

“I’ll, uh, see you soon? If you want?”

“Yeah, definitely!” His eagerness made your heart do a little Irish jig. “Let me know if you need anything, okay? I know you’re still sore from the other day.”

“Of course. You too, Peter. I mean, any excuse to see you again, am I right?” Your face heated as you realized what you said. “Text me when you get home so I know you’re safe, okay? Tell Ned I said thank you for letting him into his home, and that it was nice to meet him,” you plowed on quickly. “Anyway, thanks again, Peter. Stay safe!”

Before you realized what you were doing, you stepped forward and kissed his cheek before retreating inside. You didn’t look back as you rushed to the building door, much too focused on dealing with your river dancing heart. When you glanced at him from the door, you saw the brightest, happiest smile you had ever seen.

Your river dancing heart slowed down at the sight of his smile. Warmth filled your body and your muscles relaxed. With one more smile at him, you went inside.

As soon as you entered your apartment, you slid down the door and onto the floor. Your smile was almost hurting your face with how long it had been there.

No matter the ache in your face, you didn’t want this feeling to fade.

[starrystarrybabe]

Oh, How the Mighty Fall [In Love] CHAPTER ONE (Ben Hardy x OC)

Lily Anne Mercury is brought in to help with Bohemian Rhapsody at the request of her Uncle Bri and Uncle Rog, and along the way, she might meet someone to share her life with. The only problem with this is that while their friends and the world can see that they’re perfect for each other, they’re going to be fully blind to this for a while.

DISCLAIMER: I’m fully aware that it would’ve been physically impossible for Jim and Freddie to have a child even with this method during the time they were alive, but the idea of Freddie as a dad and the idea of how his child would turn out to be was just too sweet for me to not write. I’m also aware that I have 2 more fics in progress and I must make a masterlist, but as I’ve previously stated in other fic disclaimers, I am technologically challenged and quite overwhelmed at the moment. I apologize for this, because you all deserve the best from me, and it may take me a while to get to a place where I feel comfortable enough with the quality of everything to produce it. I do have a problem with being a perfectionist when it comes to my work, but I’m working on making that better.

April 15th, 1989

Freddie couldn’t help but smile as he saw the bundle he and Jim had been waiting for so long finally heading towards his arms. Finally, their little girl was here.

Finally, they had the child they always wanted.

Finally, they could hold a tiny person that was as close to a truly representative biological combination of the two of them.

The little girl is placed in Freddie’s arms and the tears start flowing when she opens her eyes and squirms her little arms out of her swaddle. She’s absolutely gorgeous, with Freddie’s eyes and nose, and dimples similar to Jim’s.

“Hello, darling. Welcome to the world,” Freddie tearfully coos to the girl. “Your father and I have been waiting for you for so long.”

The little girl reaches up with one hand to tug on her father’s mustache, and he lets her, smiling despite the pain. Jim watches and smiles, wrapping an arm around his partner.

They’ll send a lovely gift to Annie, the woman who carried their daughter. She was absolutely perfect, because not only was she a wonderful person, but also because her genetic makeup is nearly identical to Jim’s. Lily Anne is by all means, an accurate representation of what a child with Jim and Freddie’s genetics would look like.

“Don’t hog her, Fred. Pass her here,” Jim jokes, and cradles the little girl as she’s passed to him. “Hello, Lily. You don’t know it yet, but your papa and I love you so much already. We will always be here for you. Always. Even in death, you can bet that we’ll be keeping a close eye on you, love.”

That last sentence hits Freddie in a very sore spot, and he chokes back mournful tears. He’s not sure how much time he has left. It’s probably not even a year, based on what the doctors have told him, and that hurts badly, because all he wants now is to be there to see his daughter turn a year old.

Annie watches this and smiles sadly, squeezing Freddie’s hand. “It was an honor carrying her for you, Fred. I’m glad I could give you the best gift anyone could ever receive.”

He sniffs and looks at Annie. “I can’t thank you enough for everything you’ve done. She’s wonderful, and you’re just... darling, you’re the closest thing to an angel I’ll ever get to meet.”

Annie squeezes his hand, and Lily cries out in Jim’s arms at her papa’s distress. Freddie leans in and coos to her, tears rolling down his cheeks as he does.

“Don’t cry, darling. Please, don’t. I’m alright, love. Just getting into my emotions, that’s all. I’ll be fine.”

Lily sniffles and reaches for Freddie, and he takes her, holding her to his chest.

Jim watches and smiles. “She’s going to be amazing, Fred.”

Freddie looks at him seriously, taking a deep breath. “Promise me one thing, darling.”

“Of course, Fred.”

“You’ll make sure she knows how much I love her, even after I’m gone,” he says, rubbing the baby’s back as she falls asleep.

“I would do that no matter what, you know that.”

“Also fix her teeth and get her singing lessons,” he continues, “And if you see a good statement piece that screams my name, get that too.”

Jim laughs and sits back, and the two of them fall into a comfortable silence as they watch their newborn sleep.

May, 2018

Lily Anne curses as she drives over a particularly sharp rock and the front left tire of her vintage Rolls Royce squeals. “Stay intact, please! I don’t want you to get scratched, my love.”

She pulls down her round Dior sunglasses, and looks around the parking lot in the middle of nowhere for a spot. “Damn, why’d they choose to film in the middle of bloody nowhere?”

She finally parks, and steps out of her car, fixing up her hair and outfit, and clutching her bag. Beginning to walk over to the replica Wembley Stadium stage, she sees a head of white curls next to a man with a white beard and dark Ray Bans ahead of her. She knows that if she yells to Roger, he won’t hear her. He’s deaf as hell and blind as a bat. That leaves only one option.

“Uncle Bri! Wait up!” She yells and begins to run to catch up to the men. “I’m wearing heels, so you need to slow down!”

Brian stops and lets Roger know to stall, and when he turns around, he smiles at the girl.

She finally gets to them and huffs. “Why’d you choose this bloody field in the middle of nowhere to film? Christine can’t handle that and you know it!”

Roger frowns. “Why the hell would you drive your Rolls Royce so far? It’s vintage! If you don’t treat that car better, I’m taking it!”

Lily gasps. “How dare you! I would never let a blind old bat take my car.”

Roger playfully hits her shoulder, and Brian opens his arms for a hug. Lily gladly presses herself against the taller man, her head coming up to his chest.

“Thanks for coming to help us on this project, Lily. It’s very appreciated,” he says, ruffling her hair.

When she pulls away and continues walking with them, she shrugs. “I had to. It’s about my papa’s legacy. I can’t miss out on that. I may not have known him for long, but he has to be done justice, and I can help with that.”

Roger smiles and wraps an arm around her shoulder. “You’re already doing that by writing amazing music, love. How’s the band doing?”

She smiles back up at her uncle. “Amazing! The reviews of our new album call it our best since 2012, and we might just get an award for it.”

Lily Anne and Room 301’s latest album was all about the struggles of living in London when one is raised with the band members’ cultural and social backgrounds. With a guitarist being the child of Nigerian immigrants, two lesbians from conservative Welsh Methodist and Irish-Catholic households respectively, and a frontwoman who was raised by a gay Irish man but also a Zoroastrian extended family, it made for an interesting set of problems faced by them collectively.

The band was formed when they were all roommates in college, during their freshman year. Jim went to all the concerts and gigs he possibly could, and the four girls always loved going to Garden Lodge afterward for tea and cake.

Roger grins and looks down at his goddaughter. “Wonderful! We’re so proud of you.”

Brian nods and smiles at the girl. “Your fathers would be so happy to hear that.”

She nods, smiling at the men. “Jim had a folder of clippings from the uni paper articles about us. I just wish he was there to see our first award ceremony.”

Brian squeezes her shoulder. “I’m sure they were both there, watching. They loved you more than anything, Lily.”

Roger smiles fondly. “Remember when Freddie brought her into rehearsal in that fur coat and held her the whole time?”

Brian nods and laughs. “It was so funny to see her try to pry the microphone from his hands the whole time. We couldn’t use any of the audio from that day.”

Lily looks up at the men and smiles. “I clearly still wear fur.” She twirls in her new mint colored fur coat.

Roger nods. “You’re dressing more like Freddie every day.”

“Thank you, darling.” She flips her hair dramatically and continues walking, and her uncles just smile, watching her go along.

—

Lily is impressed by the accuracy of the set, and so are Brian and Roger. Now all that’s left to see is the actors. A meeting is called on stage, and Lily Anne sits with Brian and Roger, nursing a cup of coffee in her manicured hands.

She sees the boys come out in their costumes, and is awestruck by Rami’s look. The makeup and hair department really did well on the accuracy. All that’s missing is the teeth. Joe looks pretty much like John Deacon, but it’s scary how accurate Gwil looks when it comes to resembling Brian.

Then, Ben comes out. The look is farthest from the original, but damn. The boy looks good. If he looked more like Roger, he would simply have too much power. Ovaries would explode.

Brian begins, greeting the boys. “Hello, everyone! You all look great. We just wanted to make sure that you all meet the newest member of the Bohemian Rhapsody family. You probably recognize her, since she’s in the public eye, but we also wanted to give her a moment to introduce herself.”

Roger gestures to Lily and she smiles. “Alright, then. I’m Lily Anne, and I’m Freddie and Jim’s daughter. I’m very excited to work with you all, and I’d love to help in any way I can. I can give most of you pointers on how to navigate the characters you play, but even if I can’t, I probably know people who can.” Lily shrugs. “That’s about all I have to say. Kick ass and do my papa and the rest of the band justice. I trust that you all can do your jobs well.”

The cast is still pretty tired, but they gratefully smile and nod.

Brian smiles. “Great! You can all go back to hair and makeup.”

The cast disperses with quiet thank you’s and waves, and Brian smiles.

Lily looks up at him. “The Bohemian Rhapsody family?”

He nods. “This is something that I think will create a close bond between those boys. They already mesh so well together. You should go meet some of them one on one, Lil. The trailers are behind the stage. They’re all in a big one, getting ready together.”

Lily Anne nods. “Sure. I’ll go do that now.”

—

She knocks on the door of the trailer and a makeup artist opens it, smiling.

“You must be Lily Anne. Come on in!” The artist greets her, smiling.

“Thank you, darling. What’s your name?” She walks inside.

“Katie. Nice to meet you.” She holds out her hand for a shake, and Lily shakes it, smiling.

“The pleasure is all mine, love. Now, Brian said that I should go back here to get to know you all better since we’ll be together for a while.”

Rami waves, unable to speak since the teeth are being put in his mouth. Lily waves back at him, smiling.

Joe smiles. “Hi! I’m a huge fan of your music.”

Lily smiles and puts a hand over her heart. “Thank you so much, darling! I appreciate that very much.” She pauses and looks at him more closely. “You look awfully familiar. Have I seen you in something before?”

He shrugs. “I was in Jurassic Park. I was the little kid.”

Lily gasps. “That’s what it is! Wow! You seem very well adjusted for a child actor.”

Joe grins. “Thank you. I appreciate that.”

She turns her attention to Gwil, who now has the wig fully on.

“I must say, Gwilym, has anyone told you that you look exactly like Brian? It’s terrifying,” she comments, still in awe. “I feel like you’re actually Brian in this wig.”

Gwil smiles. “Yeah, it’s pretty insane. I think that I probably look the closest to the real thing.”

Lily nods. “I agree. I mean, you all look absolutely lovely, but for you, the accuracy is downright frightening.”

Ben speaks up, looking into the mirror. “I know I look furthest from the real thing. I hope fans don’t nitpick that too much.”

Lily scoffs. “I’m willing to bet that part of the reason why you were cast was that you’re similar enough, but also prettier than Roger ever was. He’s an egotistical wanker. He’d do something like that.”

Ben laughs, turning partially red, and Lily feels herself trying not to visibly show her arousal. What a beautiful man. She’s already in love.

“I certainly hope my acting abilities have something to do with my casting,” he says, trying to become less red.

Lily rolls her eyes. “Of course they do, darling! You were amazing in Eastenders. Why’d you quit that? I loved it.”

He sighs. “I want to be seen as more than just a pretty blonde. I became uncomfortable with being shirtless so often and wanted to be used as more than just something that’s good to look at. Now, I try to take more jobs that don’t require me to be shirtless.”

Lily nods. Damn, he has substance and he’s gorgeous. She needs to hop on that once filming is over. “I understand. I promise you, you will be amazing in this, and I’m sure it will open up more opportunities that you want afterward.”

He smiles at her and she has to keep herself from physically melting. Fuck, he’s so pretty and nice and wonderful.

“I really appreciate that, Lil. Can I call you that? Lil?” He asks her.

‘You can call me whatever you want, you beautiful man.’

“Of course! That’s fine.”

Rami finally gets the teeth in and looks to Lily. “Finally, I can speak. I just wanted to say that it’s an absolute honor to play your father, and I would love nothing more than to make him and you proud.” Rami’s sentences are slow, calculated, and incredibly heartfelt.

Lily walks over and smiles, giving him a hug. “That means so much to me, Rami. Really, it does. You look amazing, and I can’t wait to see you perform. You’ll all do amazing.”

The cast thanks her, and she can’t help but melt at Ben’s smile.

“After today is finished, would you all like to go to Garden Lodge with me instead of sleeping in these trailers? I have so many spare rooms and we can order food and get to know each other.” She offers.

“Can Lucy, Allen, and Aaron come as well? They’re part of this as well.” Rami asks.

She nods. “Of course. My Rolls Royce won’t fit that many people, but I’m sure at least one of you has a car here.”

Gwilym nods. “I have my car here. I can help bring people.”

Joe smiles and looks up at Lily. “If you don’t mind, I’d like to ride in the Rolls Royce. I’ve never done that before and it sounds fun.”

Lily grins. “What if I told you that it’s a vintage Rolls Royce?”

Joe and Ben’s eyes light up.

Ben looks up at her. “Please let me in that car.”

‘I’d let you in more places than my car.’

“Of course, love. You’re all welcome to ride in my car.” Lily grins at the boys, who look at each other excitedly. “I’ll ask the director if I can bring you all home with me tonight,” She teasingly says before she leaves the trailer with a flourish.

Katie smiles and moves to adjust Ben’s wig, trying to get it to be perfect. “She seems to be very nice.”

Joe nods. “I like her. What do you think, Ben?”

Ben turns to face him. “Why are you asking me in particular?”

Rami turns to look at him. “Because you seem very interested in her, and her in you.”

Ben scoffs. “I was being nice. We just met her. It’s too soon to make that judgment.”

The rest of the boys look at each other skeptically.

Joe smiles at Gwil. “I give it four months before one of them makes a move.”

Gwil raises a brow. “Who do you think will make the first move, though?”

Rami thinks, and shrugs. “Too soon to tell.”

By this point, Ben is bright red. “Can you all just stop? I’d like that.”

Katie sighs. “I’ll need to put on a lot more foundation if he stays this red. I’d love to continue this later, but now it needs to stop.”

The boys relent but still smile to themselves. They’ll just sit back and watch the two discover their attraction on their own.

Lily Anne gets permission to take home the boys and Lucy, Allen, and Aaron. She will spend some time with Aaron, especially since he plays Jim, and for her, it must be accurate. Her father is by all means, the most important man who has been and will ever be in her life, and she will defend him until the day she dies.

January 1, 2010

Lily frowns as she picks up her flip phone from her purse and steps outside of the frat party she’s at. “Hello? Who is this?”

“Hi, Lily. It’s Laura, your father’s nurse,” a stressed out voice from the other end responds to Lily’s inquiry. “I was concerned you wouldn’t pick up since you’re probably busy and don’t recognize my new number.”

“I always respond, Laura. What is it? Is my dad alright?” Lily becomes concerned. She knows that her father is getting increasingly worse from his cancer and AIDS, and he doesn’t have much longer to live.

“He’s... he wants you to come. Immediately. To be completely honest, I don’t fully know why he’s asking for you, but he sounds distressed,” Laura explains.

Lily’s eyes widen and she blinks back tears. Dear god, please don’t let this be what she thinks it is. Please, if there’s something out there that loves her, she will pray to it to keep her father alive.

“Say no more. I’ll be right over,” she responds, hanging up and calling over a cab.

-

Garden Lodge is only ten minutes away from her university, since she wants to make sure to always be there for her sick father, and it is the longest ten minutes she’s ever experienced in her life. When the ride is over, she throws money at the cabbie and tells him to keep the change before running inside the gate and banging on the door.

Laura opens it and she continues to run in her stilettos and short party dress. When she gets up the stairs she hears the gentle sounds of her papa’s voice singing Love of My Life, and enters her dad’s room.

Jim turns to see his daughter practically throw herself on the bed and hold his hand.

“I came as soon as Laura called. What is it, Dad?” Lily’s voice shakes.

“Love... I think you know what’s happening. We both know what’s happening,” he tells his daughter, brushing a stray hair from her face.

“Dad, you’ve had scares before. Maybe it’s just another one of those,” she tries to say, attempting to convince herself more than him while tears threaten to fall from her eyes.

He wipes away a single tear from her face and smiles gently at her. “No. This is different, Lily. I know it.”

She begins sobbing, moving to hug her father around the waist and rest her head on his chest like she did when she was little. “I don’t want you to go, Dad. Please, try to hold on a little longer.”

He strokes her hair and smiles. “Your Papa is waiting for me, darling. I’ve held on for as long as I can, my love. If I could stay with you forever I would.”

She can’t speak clearly, but squeezes her father and listens as his heartbeat begins to slow down. “I love you so much, Dad. Thank you so much for raising me and being so wonderful—“ She’s cut off by a sob. “I’ll miss you so much, Dad.”

Jim sniffles and tilts her head up to look at him. “You’re the best thing to ever happen to me, Lily Anne. I’m so proud of you. I love you and the band so much, and I know you’ll succeed in whatever you choose to do. I’ll always be close by, and you know that. Your Papa will finally have me to watch you by his side.”

She blinks away tears and tries to make a joke. “What about the cats, Dad?”

Jim laughs, ruffling her hair. “I’m sure Delilah is there in his lap, watching us in judgment because we’re not petting her.”

The two of them laugh sadly and hold each other close, quieting down as Brian’s guitar wails.

“I’ve got to go, Lily. He’s becoming insistent,” Jim whispers, and she nods.

“Give him a hug for me, please.” She responds, hugging him.

“Will do, love. Your Papa and I will be watching.”

“Even when I get married?” Lily sniffles and looks up at her father.

“I’ll knock over your Papa’s ashes when we find the man for you,” Jim responds, kissing her forehead before closing his eyes and finally, drifting off into the afterlife.

When Lily Anne places her ear to his chest, she hears nothing.

Laura walks inside the room and looks at the scene in front of her, and sighs, taking the needle off of the record as Good Company starts playing.

Lily Anne simply holds her father tightly before sitting up, kissing his forehead, and moving to leave the room.

-

Brian is sleeping when Lily calls, and picks up the phone groggily, sitting up in bed. “Who’s calling at this hour?”

Sniffles.

“Can I help you?” He’s beginning to get annoyed, and now Anita has woken up, resting one hand on his shoulder.

“U-Uncle Bri, can I come over?” Lily Anne is practically crying over the phone.

“Lily, what’s wrong?” He frowns, and Anita sits next to him, trying to listen in on the call.

“I-It’s my Dad... h-he’s...” She begins sobbing again, and Brian brings a hand up to his lips.

“Oh no. Lily Anne, I’m so sorry. Come on over, love. I’ll call Roger and tell him the news,” Brian offers, trying to console the girl.

“Th-Thank you. I’ll be right over,” she says before hanging up.

When he puts down the phone, he breathes heavily, blinking back tears. “At least he’s with Freddie.”

Anita looks down. “Poor Lily. I’ll start up a pot of tea for her, you call Roger.” She kisses his cheek and moves to go to the kitchen.

-

Roger picks up on the third ring, and he’s angry at being woken up at this hour. “Brian, what the hell are you doing calling me this late—“

“Jim’s gone. Lily is coming over to my place, and I’m sure she’d appreciate you joining us.”

Roger is silent for a moment before sighing. “I’ll be right there. Should I tell the kids?”

“Once they’re awake. Right now, Lily needs us.”

“I’ll be there as soon as possible.”

-

Lily Anne rings the doorbell, still sniffling. Laura had driven her over before calling the funeral company and beginning to make arrangements.

Brian opens the door and sighs, hugging the girl tightly. She sobs into his chest, shaking like a leaf. The oversized sweater of Jim’s that she’s wearing now only accentuates how small she is, and right now she doesn’t look like a 20-year-old woman, but a little girl.

That night is full of tears, tea, and ends with Lily Anne falling asleep in a guest bedroom, mascara staining her eyes and running down her cheeks in rivulets.

Lily Anne smiles as Ben and Joe gape at her car, clearly impressed by the beautiful vintage. She’s very proud of Christine. She moves to open up the trunk and help the boys put their overnight bags inside, and moves a box of sage out of the way.

“If you don’t mind me asking, why do you have a huge box of sage in your car?” Gwilym asks her.

“I don’t mind at all. Actually, I sage my entire house, so the ghosts don’t cause too much trouble.”

Ben turns and frowns when he hears the word ‘ghosts.’ “Pardon me? Ghosts?”

She nods. “Garden Lodge is very haunted. None of the spirits are bad, though. Just bothersome.”

Joe raises a brow. “What do they do?”

She sighs and closes the trunk. “Well, six of the eight of them are cats, so they knock things off of shelves and meow at random times. Sometimes you can actually see them running across the hall.”

Rami purses his lips. “I can only guess that the other two ghosts are your fathers.”

She nods and smiles. “Yeah. They are. Sometimes they can be a bit overbearing, but they’ll leave me be when I ask them to.”

The boys look nervous. Lily Anne scoffs and rolls her eyes.

“Don’t worry. We can sage the entire place and nothing will bother you. And if something does, tell them to go away and they will.”

They still look scared.

“If I order Nando’s will it calm you all down?” She tries to calm them with basically a bribe in the name of keeping possible friends.

Ben and Gwil nod and Joe and Rami look confused.

“I’ve never had Nando’s,” Rami comments.

“Yeah, me neither,” Joe adds.

“Mate,” Ben says in disbelief before shaking his head. “No. We’re going to order for you then because Nando’s is the best and there’s only one correct order,” Ben explains.

“Of course! The chicken burger,” Lily Anne adds on, expecting Ben to agree with her.

“What? No, it’s the chicken wrap, hands down,” Ben retorts, insulted at the notion that she thinks the chicken burger is better than the chicken wrap.

“Are you insane, mate? It’s the bloody chicken burger. The chicken wrap is good, but it isn’t the best. Gwil, you like Nando’s as well. What do you think?” Lily turns to Gwilym, who backs up slightly under both their stares.

“You know me better,” Ben argues.

“I’m correct, he’s wrong,” Lily retorts. “Gwilym Lee, in the pursuit of truth, I demand that you agree with me.”

“I’ve been working with you for six weeks, mate.” Ben looks up at Gwilym, basically pleading him at this point. “We’re practically brothers at this point.”

Gwil sighs and raises his hands in surrender, sympathetically looking at Ben. “I’m so sorry, Ben. I really am. I love you, but it’s got to be the chicken burger. Lily Anne is right.”

Ben turns away from Gwil, shaking his head as Lily Anne grins.

“I knew it! I fucking knew it!” Lily Anne jumps up to high five Gwil’s hand before looking over at Ben. “I’m sure you’re correct about many other things, but the best food at Nando’s is not one of them. Now let’s go before I starve.”

Everyone heads towards their respective cars, Gwil moving to his own with Lucy, Rami, Aaron, and Allen. The Rolls Royce is only big enough for three people when the overnight bags are added in, since the trunk is too small for four duffel bags. Thus, she can only take two other people: Ben and Joe.

Lily Anne is about to get into her car when she sees that Ben still hasn’t moved. She sighs and walks over, crossing her arms.

“We don’t have all day, darling. Let’s get to the car, okay?” She tries to reason with him, placing a hand on his arm.

“I’m still insulted. All this time, I’ve always thought the chicken wrap was better,” he says, looking down at her with genuine confusion. “What else am I wrong about?”

She takes his hand and holds it, looking up at him. “You’re very cute when you’re upset, but we can’t go down that path, Ben. It only leads to more questions, and we don’t need those right now.”

He’s so cute. Oh lord, he’s the most adorable and simultaneously the hottest man she’s ever met. A true specimen. A one of a kind combination of a great personality, a rocking body, and the cutest puppy dog eyes she ever did see. She must have him.

He nods and makes the poutiest face in the world. “Can I be shotgun and play the music?”

She nods, squeezing his hand. “Of course, darling. Come along, now.”

Joe moves from shotgun to the backseat, and Ben plugs his phone into the AUX cord as Lily Anne starts up the car and begins to exit the parking lot, followed by Gwil.

“What music are we listening to, Ben?” Joe asks, taking a video on his phone.

Ben turns around, shrugging. He’s clearly still upset. “All Dead, All Dead is a good one.”

Lily Anne turns to face him in disgust, shaking her head. “Dear god, no! Just because your taste in Nando’s is trash doesn’t mean that you get to play one of the most depressing Queen songs in the world!”

Ben looks back at her and snaps, pointing a finger at her. “Don’t you dare say that! I have an exceptional taste in Nando’s!”

“Oh yeah? What’s your favorite side to go with your chicken wrap, Ben?” Lily Anne pulls out of the parking lot and onto the gravel road.

“The potato mash!” Ben shoots back, causing Lily Anne to lean her head back and groan.

“Bruv, no! We all know the correct answer is the Portuguese rice!” She wrings her hands in agitation.

“You’ve got to be kidding me!” Ben looks out the window, shaking his head and dismissively stating, “I’m just going to put on March of the Black Queen.”

Lily softens as suddenly as Ben snapped, resting a hand over her heart. “I love that song! One of my favorites is White Queen, though.”

Ben smiles back at her, the whole Nando’s exchange forgotten for now. “That’s my favorite one! I could listen to it forever.”

Joe posts the video of the exchange to Instagram, with the caption, “How long until @lilyannemercury steals my man?”

TAGLIST: @andtheytoldustotellyouhello @plethora-of-things @borhap-socials @everybodyplaythegame @i-the-fangirl @deakydeakydeaky @shishterfackisback  @samanthadegaro @lv7867 @fatbottomedcurls @hystericallyqueen @haisimsim 

[writing-ro]

Fictober 19-8: “I can’t come back.”

@fictober-event // Set in a Multi-fandom Fantasy AU where most if not all kinds of fantasy creatures exist alongside humans, though the two cultures stay fairly separate, with many humans being afraid or prejudice against creatures.

Rating: T Fandom: Dragon Age, Characters: Analei Amell (OFC), Revka Amell, Orana (Dragon Age), Leliana (Dragon Age), Mikoto Hawke (OFC), Mother Dorathea | Divine Justinia V Ships: Analei Amell/Leliana  Additional Tags: Secret Wedding, Revka Amell is an Awesome Mom, Analei has the best siblings and maid, Happy Lesbian Day!, 

For two weeks, Analei was a ghost in her own home. Aside from meals and one trip to the library to collect books (where she was deliberately kept away from the magic tomes), she was locked in her room. She tried small rebellion, keeping her curtains closed for all the day and refusing baths when her maid (not Orana, her elven confidante sent by her Hawke cousins, she had been given to Adria) prepared to draw them. She read or embroidered by the light of one candle, only to stave off the madness of boredom, and took no care of cosmetics or hygiene except to brush her hair, purely because she herself could not stand snarls. As such, when she came for meals, she was sallow and greasy, and while she did nothing to exert herself, she naturally began to smell. She said not a word at meals, even with her dear mother Revka or beloved siblings, and only ate enough that she knew she would not faint. It worked for a week, then Aristide send Rickon and Rodrick with the maid and gave her the choice of either coming clean or being barred from meals entirely. So she bathed, but kept to the dark. 

She was allowed visitors, but for those two weeks, she only had two; Jakob and Lianne. The twins came together on the first day of her imprisonment and apologized profusely for their roles in Aristide finding out, and Analei forgave them immediately, for it was not either of their faults. Lianne brought back word that Aristide was speaking with the de Launcets to push Analei and Emile’s wedding to the end of the month, with the suggestion of a long honeymoon at one of their inland estates. Jakob admitted he had ridden to the clearing and gave Leliana a warning, so by the time Eddard and his hunters got there, Leliana was no where to be found, with her belongings missing. Analei worried Aristide would know of his ride, but he assured her no one was any the wiser of his leaving, for Mattias and Johann claimed he had been drinking with them in the cellar, and he used a horse of one of his other friends who owed him quite the debt. 

Analei held him close after that confession, and he passed on a handkerchief Leliana had entrusted to him. It was the first courting gift Analei had given her, embroidered with a nightingale holding a bunch of forget-me-nots. Analei managed to hold herself together long enough for her siblings to leave, then cried anew, and prayed to the Lady that Leliana would be protected. 

It was late evening on the fourteenth day of her imprisonment when there was a knocking on her door, a firm thud very different from the maid’s soft rap. She looked up from the book she’d been staring at for the past half-hour, and called out, “Come in.”

Revka Amell walked in, all grace and beauty even nearing fifty years of age, followed by Adria,  who was starting to grow into a similar bearing, and Orana, with her unobtrusive servant’s walk. With Amell blue eyes, black hair and a generous figure each, some would Revka’s traits had passed over her first daughter for her second, and be mostly right. But difference created the strongest bond between mother and eldest, and when together one could see they shared the same quirk of their brow, the same smile, and the same sparkle in their eye. A sparkle Analei was surprised to see now. 

“Good evening, Analei,” Revka said. 

“Good evening, Mother,” Analei said, closing her book and setting it on the table. “What brings you here?”

“A mother can’t visit her daughter?” Revka turned to the door, which was still partially open. “I’ll just close this now, I wish to discuss women’s things with my daughter. Her wedding is coming up, you know.” She closed it before the guard could respond, and nodded to Adria, who pulled a paper seal and charcoal from within her sleeves. She placed the seal on the door, right below the keyhole, and started sketching on it with charcoal. 

Revka turned to Analei and gave her a sad smile. “Oh my little bluebird.” She crossed the room and knelt by Analei’s chair a hand reaching out to cup her cheek. “I am so sorry to not have visited you in this time. There was just so much to prepare.”

“Prepare?” Analei took her mother’s hand in her own. “Prepare for what?”

“Your wedding, of course.” Revka waved with her other hand and Orana came over with a bundle in her arms, holding it as Revka started to unfold it. “We needed to make alterations to ensure a proper fit, after all. Luckily, Orana had your most recent measurements and she, Lianne and Adria together make for quick work.” 

Analei was about to ask again what her mother was talking about, when she saw the gown that had been wrapped up and gasped. It was Leandra’s wedding dress, or rather, the one she would have worn had her engagement gone through. But her sisters and maid had transformed it. The lace overdress had been dyed a soft blue, and the gold silk trim on the high collar, shoulders and hem was replaced with silver. The underdress remained snow white, but the cuffs and hem were embroidered with blue forget-me-nots, and on above them on the sleeves were purple and blue songbirds - bluebirds and nightingales. 

Analei hesitantly reached out, worried this was a dream, but she felt the fabric under her fingers, and it was just imperfect enough to make her realize it was real. “But-but how?” 

“Oh, Uncle is so distracted with the negotiations with the du Launcets he was all too eager to leave the women’s work to the women, and Aunt Bethann has been so poorly lately, it’s a relief for me to take it off her hands.” Revka smiled. “Now soon, Lianne will be by with one of her teas, and it’s Jameson on guard tonight - you know he has such a sweet spot for her. I’d almost allow him to make a courting request if I didn’t know that Uncle would never allow it. The tea will have siren’s tear lavender in it, so he’ll be drowsy and susceptible to suggestion. Lianne will tell him we all spoke for a while, then left when you prepared for bed. Coupled with the conversation seal Adria’s placed by the door, he’ll honestly believe I’m speaking to you about a woman’s duties to a husband.”

“And don’t you worry about where your bride will be,” Adria said, standing and dusting off her skirt. “Jakob told her of one of the old mine tunnels that goes from the coast right up near Hightown, and he hired some friends to escort her. When we went to services on Sunday, Mother Dorathea told us she had made it safely to the chantry. Both of them are waiting for us.”

Analei looked at her wrists and raised them up. “But, the cuffs. I can’t even leave my room without someone being alerted.”

Orana reached into her pocket and pulled out a silver key, passing it to Revka who pressed it to the cuffs, making the seam and lock reappear. “Lord Adam would make a killing as a pickpocket in Lowtown, should your marriage truly bring ruin to the family.”

Analei’s eyes welled with tears as the full implications of it all hit her. “If- if we do this, Leliana and I will have to leave Kirkwall. I- I can’t come back. Not until Aristide dies, and maybe even Grandfather.”

“We know,” Orana said, smiling even as her own tears started. “But we’d all rather you be happy far from here than waste away as a du Launcet.”

Revka reached out to cup Analei’s face again. “You know there is no love lost between your father and I, and I’m fairly certain my mother caught the cough just to leave your grandfather. Your aunt Leandra was the perfect Amell, and then she left with her heart in the talons of a Hawke. If I had to pick one of those fates for you, I would rather have you be Leandra than me.”

Analei choked on a sob and threw herself into her mother’s arms, tears streaming down her face. “Thank you. Thank you.”

Revka hugged her tight, then drew back. “Now, we best hurry and get you ready. We only have a small window to get out of here.”

With her mother, sister and maid helping, Analei was soon scrubbed clean, dressed in the beautiful gown, and had her hair pulled back into a fancier version of her usual bun. It was held in place with her favorite hairclip, which had an addition of two feathers attached to it, one blue and one brown with a lavender tip. Adria did her makeup, continuing the color theme, then Revka took off her necklace and hung it around Analei’s neck. Analei almost teared up again seeing it, staving them off when Adria told her to not ruin her hard work. She had crafted it for Revka when she was twelve, testing her transmutation spells. A pendant of an Amell blue sapphire with a center of the soft pale green of her own eyes, on a silver chain. She placed a hand on it, and Revka placed her hand over hers.

“A piece of your family, to remember where you came from,” Revka recited, and reached back to touch the brown feather. “A piece of your spouse, to remember who your life belongs to.” She touched the clip itself. “And a piece of yourself, to remember who you are.”

“But where’s the piece from my friends?” Analei asked. She truly did not have many, most of Kirkwall’s society did not find joy in spending hours studying a topic until exhaustion, and often a tangent she brought up at a party could bring conversation to a halt until someone changed the subject. 

Orana reached into the pocket of her dress and pulled out a small box. “These were my parents’. My father managed to pass them to me before he was killed. I have no interest in marriage, and I have my locket to carry their memory. They’ll have a much better use with you.”

Analei took the box and opened it to show a simple pair of rings, silver with engravings of elven marriage blessings. “Orana…” Analei stood and wrapped the elf in a tight hug. “You’ve always been my closest friend.”

“And you mine.” Orana held the hug for a moment, then stepped back. “I’ll carry them for now, then give them back when it’s time.”

Analei nodded and looked in the mirror when Adria drew her over. Analei almost didn’t recognize herself. She never lacked confidence in her appearance, and was told she was pretty often enough. But looking in the mirror, for once she truly felt beautiful. 

Revka smiled over her shoulder, as if she was reading her thoughts. “It’s love; it makes even the plainest of us beautiful.” She pressed a kiss to Analei’s cheek, then took her traveling cloak from Orana and wrapped it around her shoulders. “Now we best hurry, before Uncle leaves his study for the evening.

They had Analei stand by the bed as they went to the door and called out good nights to each other as Adria pulled the seal from the door and opened it. Analei then rushed over on quiet feet, hood drawn over her head, and walked out between her mother and sister, who she only now realized wore gowns of the same navy as her cloak, and the bag they had packed clothes and some valuables into was dark as well. As promised, Jameson’s eyes were droopy and he paid near no mind to them as Revka told him Analei was preparing for bed and did not wish to be disturbed for any reason. They rushed silently down the hall to the servant’s stair, and out a side entrance to the gardens. A little used gate was in the back corner, near where the stables were. By this gate, Analei found her other siblings waiting.

“We can’t all go to the wedding,” Lianne said. “But we couldn’t let you leave without seeing you off.”

Analei smiled and gave her sister a hug. “Thank you, Lia. Keep making your teas. They’re already being incredibly useful.” She went to Adam and squeezed him tight, even as he initially stiffened before hugging her back. “Don’t drive Mother to drink now, and keep practicing your frost spells.”

“Too late for the former,” he teased, stepping back. “But just wait, I’ll be a master of them when you get back, you’ll see.”

Analei smiled and nodded, hoping she would see that. Then she turned to Jakob, who had his head bowed. “Hey, none of that now,” Analei said, tilting his chin up so he’d look her in the eye, a bit ridiculous since he was a good three inches taller than her. “I do not blame you for any part of this matter.”

“But I was the one to reveal it all to Uncle.” His eyes welled with tears and his lip trembled. 

“And it could just as easily been anyone. He was already getting suspicious, he would have sent Eddard after be one of these days, and we’d still be here.” Analei wiped away the first tear to fall. “You saved Leliana from the hunters, and gave us a chance of a life together. I can never thank you enough for that. So no more tears now, okay?”

Jakob smiled and wiped his eyes, then pulled her into a bone-crushing hug. “I won’t let Uncle keep you away long. I’ll make him let you back, by whatever means necessary.”

“I know you will,” Analei said. When he loosened his hold, she rose up on her toes to press a kiss to his forehead. “Take care of everyone, okay.”

He nodded. “I will.” 

He let her go and stepped back, and the wedding party slipped out through the gate, freshly oiled two days in a row to eliminate any squeaks on the hinges. 

It took a fifteen minute walk through the near deserted streets to reach the chantry, and when they entered it was nearly entirely dark, except for the torches by the doors and three lit candelabras around the alter. Mother Dorathea stood at the alter, speaking with about the last person Analei expected to see. 

“Mikoto?” It was barely more than a whisper, but it carried across the empty chapel and her cousin turned, her pink dress twirling around her ankles. 

“Surprised?” she asked with a smile, her brown Hawke eyes holding the Amell sparkle, and Analei hurried down the aisle to her.

“What are you doing here?” She now noticed the people sitting in the first pew, recognizing them as Mikoto’s elven lover Fenris, and her friends, the guardswoman Aveline and lover Donnic, and Varric Tethras, who was also the author of Analei’s favorite romance series. 

“We were having drinks at the Hanged Man when Jakob came looking for someone to play bodyguard. When he explained what - or rather who - it was for, we offered to do it for the small price of a silver each, and an invitation to the wedding. Jackson and Isabela are with your bride to be. They and I will be her bridal party, and Adria and Orana will be yours.” She smiled wider and picked a bouquet off the altar. “Fenris is musical accompaniment.”

“Under protest, I might add,” Fenris said, but his smile belayed his gruff tone. 

It took all her willpower to not tear up again. Analei had never felt so loved by her family in her life. 

“Since we are all here, shall we get started?” Dorathea asked. “I understand we are on a bit of a schedule tonight.”

Analei nodded, and accepted the bouquet of flowers Mikoto handed her, white roses with a single red one, surrounded by forget-me-nots and lavender. Her party gathered on the right side of the hall, and when Mikoto’s lute started plucking out a wedding march, they started walking out, first Orana, then Adria, and finally Analei on Revka’s arm. 

Analei had purposefully kept her eyes down during the bridesmaid marches, so when she looked up to see Leliana, she couldn’t help a gasp. Her love was wearing a gown of her native Orlais, with a wide collar and short off-the-shoulder sleeves of silver trimmed white silk that covered her busts. The trim continued down the bodice, with a large broach securing a belt of the same under the bust, and the bodice itself was a soft lavender that continued into an overskirt embroidered with bronze to look like feathers, to match the wings on her back, which were glossy and bright. The underskirt was plain white, except for a band on the hem of embroidered lavender and forget-me-nots. In her hand was a matching bouquet to Analei’s own.

When they met at the altar, Revka pressed a light kiss to Analei’s cheek before joining her and Leliana’s hands together. Analei squeezed it as she stared at Leliana for a moment. 

“You’re here.”

Leliana smiled and nodded. “And you’re here.” 

“And since you are both here, let us begin,” Dorathea said, and everyone laughed before she started the ceremony. “In the name of the Maker who brought us this world…”

Afterwards, Analei did not remember much of the ceremony itself. All her thoughts were on the feel of Leliana’s hand in her own, and the fact that they were there, in that moment. 

“May I have the rings?” Dorathea asked, and Orana stepped forward, passing over the rings and taking the bouquets. “Analei, take a ring and repeat after me. With this ring…”

Analei did so, holding it above Leliana’s hand. “With this ring…”

“I give you my heart…”

“I give you my heart…”

“From this day forward…”

“From this day forward…”

“You will never walk alone…”

“You will never walk alone…”

“My arms will be your home.”

“My arms will be your home.” Analei slide the ring on Leliana’s finger, and both gave a gasp as the engravings lit up with a small flash of light. 

“Now Leliana, take a ring and repeat after me. With this ring…”

Leliana repeated the vows, and the same light flashed as it set in place on Analei’s finger. As if on cue, the tears both had been holding back started to fall even as they grinned.

“By the power vested in me by the Maker, Our Lady, and the Chantry, I now pronounce you married. You may kiss the bride.”

Analei and Leliana needed to further encouragement, reaching for each other and meeting their lips in such a sweet kiss, Analei didn’t know how she didn’t die right in that moment. It went on for long enough they could hear a laugh from one of the bridal party. 

“Well now, do you think they’d notice if we just left? Or should we stay so they don’t defile the altar?”

They broke apart then, and Analei saw it was Isabela, for once wearing a skirt that that went past the tops of her boots and didn’t show her hips. “I like to believe I was raised a little better than that, Isabela.” 

The pirate captain just smiled. “You might, but I’d bet your siren wasn’t.” She jerked her thumb to the door. “Come on, your cousin hired a cart from a dwarf and his son to get us to the harbor, but it won’t be waiting forever.”

Analei nodded and turned to her mother, who’s own face was wet with tears. They wrapped each other in a hug, and when they parted, Revka pressed a kiss to her forehead. “Stay safe now, my little bluebird. I’ll be expecting letters.”

Analei nodded. “I will write every week, and send them when I can.” She hugged Adria and kissed her sister’s cheek. “I’m sorry I won’t be here for your wedding.”

Adria smiled and shook her head, her own tears finally falling. “Saemus won’t mind a long engagement. And who knows, maybe Uncle will have a stroke in a week and you’ll be able to come right back.”

Analei gave a small laugh. “One can dream.” She at last turned to Orana. They needed no words, having said all they needed to, and just hugged each other. “I’ll write you as well.”

“Don’t be getting a new best friend now,” Orana teased.

“But don’t you know?” Leliana asked, having finished wishing goodbye to Dorathea and wrapping her arm around Analei’s waist. “You’re supposed to marry your best friend.”

They all laughed, and Orana passed them back their boquets before the party headed to the doors. The cart was a simple goods cart, but the dwarves who owned it had added ribbon to the side in an attempt to cheer it up. “Your carriage awaits, m’ladies.” The father dwarf bowed from the driver’s seat. 

Those bound for the harbor climbed inside, while those who would stay waited on the steps. Analei and Leliana gave one last wave, then turned and tossed the bouquets behind them, not looking back to see Adria and Aveline had caught it. They were facing forward, to their new life together.

[afewmarvelousthoughts]

Stay Ch. 16

Master List

Pairing: Natasha X Reader (Female)

Summary: You have a gift, the ability to see other people’s innermost secrets. For years you used it to gather intel for the highest bidder when you take on The Widow. After she becomes more than a mark the two of you spend years stealing moments. Post snap you wait in your designated meeting place, look back on the sordid past you share with the woman you love and hope against everything that she’s still alive.

Warnings: Angst, and fluff, and feels oh my!

A/N:  So yeah I swear I wroth an authors note for this... but idfk what happened. 

ANYWAY! Thank you all for being so patient while I got my life together. This one is also short and sweet (guess that’s the mood I’m in). However, y’all should know me by now. This is just the calm before the storm. 

Hope you enjoy this one my pumpkins! 

Tags are open!

@mywinterwolf  @disagreetoagree  @breezy1415  @peachthatdrinkslemonade  @5aftermidnight@jeromethepsycho  @marvel-randomness  @daniellajocelyn  @katecolleen  @yanginginthere@wonderlandmind4 @piensa-bonito @for-the-love-of-the-fandom @lesbian-girls-wayhaught @siriuslycloudy2

March 2007

At some point in the last five months, you’d stopped recognizing yourself. The woman in the mirror wasn’t Y/N. Her hair was different, down to even the eyebrows. Her accent distinctly that of a life long Londoner. She worked for an independent UK couture fashion magazine, chose wine over whiskey, and was distinctly heterosexual.

When the chance to work this job requiring deep cover came up in December you jumped on it. You didn’t want to be you anymore. The you that couldn’t be with the woman you loved. The you that was heartbroken. The you who was beginning to doubt that you’d ever be happy. Fuck her.

Being Charlie Daniels was far better. She was, of course, a real person. Just one who was now living comfortably in the Bahamas courtesy of MI6. Even legit agencies had use of freelance talent every now and then.

Settling into her life had been easy. Not setting her boss on fire or blowing his brains out daily was a different task altogether. Turned out that a magazine was a great front for a crime empire. Lots of international travel, young and beautiful and desperate men and women, money exchanged in countless untraceable ways, on and on. And this fucker was happy to take advantage of every single disgusting avenue it opened up.

You almost had everything you needed to hand to MI6, get your obscenely large payout, and get on to another gig while they threw all of these bastards into cells to rot for the rest of their miserable lives. Just one more trip. After whatever horrible things they lay out in Tokyo you’ll be set.

Tokyo is one of those cities you can lose yourself in. Like New York but better for its interesting balance of vibrancy and grounded reserve. You absolutely love it.

The whole point of the trip, at least on the surface, was to focus on Fashion Week Tokyo. Honestly, there was a part of you that wished this was your world. Nothing but runway shows and after parties. Writing about the latest trends rather than delving into the inner workings of the worlds miscreants

Oh well. It was nice enough to pretend. You had to admit that you’d miss Charlie Daniels once you shed this skin in a couple of weeks.

You’re sitting two people down from your boss at an underground show. The level of security here screams that there are other things going on behind the scenes but it’s still a room filled with a who’s who of the Japanese and international fashion communities.

This was your third show of the day, and you knew there would be a party after where you’d have to schmooze all while plucking information from your unsuspecting fellow guests. You’re exhausted. So rather than pay much attention to the show you let your mind wander.

When she walks out you feel her rather than see her.  Slowly you turn your head to stare dumbstruck at the model walking onto the catwalk. Your heart begins beating against your ribs, your mouth goes dry, your hands shake.

It takes every ounce of control you have to keep your emotions in. To not scream “Natasha!” at the top of your lungs. To not grab her and run for the hills. Charlie Daniels and her easy life be damned. It’s hard but you manage.

As she turns and comes back down, passing now closer to you, her eyes don’t graze  the crowd at all. Head up, shoulders back, she walks the runway like she’d been doing it for years.

The rest of the show is maybe ten minutes but it feels like years. You know the models are all attending the party. Eye candy for the high end guests.

It’s fairly easy to ditch your coworkers in the crowd as you try to find the best vantage point in the room without being too obvious. After a solid twenty minutes, you find yourself planning an escape route. Most of the models are milling about but she’s no where to be seen. You will find her.

But you know you can’t skip out just yet. At the bar, you order a red wine and make yourself seen. Charlie would never miss the whole party after all. You spend a bit chatting with designers and a few models, feigning interest in the whole thing until you hear your boss call out to you.

“Oy, Charlie!” Carl’s voice alone makes you want to put him down. When you turn he’s waving you over to the bar. Sighing heavily you head over.

You’re about ten feet away when you see her, head back laughing at something Carl or his friend had said. Both men are far to close to her for your liking and the hungry look on Carl’s face sets your blood boiling.

He slings an arm around your shoulders and you carefully coach your face to not show disgust. “Charlie here is my best writer. Doin’ some pieces for us on this whole thing,” he waves his other hand around wildly.

“Good to meet ya, Charlie, I’m Dan,” the other man, clearly American says.

“Likewise,” Natasha doesn’t react to the accent at all.

“This here is-”

“Natalie,” Natasha cuts him off, extending a hand to you. Holding her eyes with yours you take it. It’s like touching a live wire.

“Natalie is an American model working here in Japan. May be a good topic for a piece.” He ribs you leaning closer, “And a good piece for the office eh?” Suddenly that MI6 money seems far less appealing.

“I’d love that,” Natasha beams. “Why don’t you guys go mingle and Charlie and I can chat!” The men exchange a glance, but there’s plenty of fresh meat around to sink their teeth into.

Carl flashes you a greasy smile and a wink as he walks away. Thinking clearly that you’re going to snare this woman for him. You, unfortunately, had a few others. Not something you were proud of. Demands of the job you told yourself.

“She’ll take a vodka neat,” you tell the bartender.

“Yes,” Natasha smiles at him, “Whiskey for her. Makers if you have it.” He thinks nothing of it and makes your drinks.

“So, how’s modeling in Japan?”

“Probably about as good as writing for a sleazy jackal.”

You laugh, “That bad? What’s the goal.”

“Getting a cover,” you commend the clever word play.

“That’s a good goal. Long term?”

“Something like that.” She takes a sip of her vodka, “How long are you here?”

“End of the week.” Your skin itches to touch her. The men are rounding back. You hold her gaze and shift your eyes back to them. She catches on.

“Perfect! It’s so hard to have a good interview here, don’t you think?”

“Absolutely. Why don’t you come by my hotel?” You whip out your spare key card. “I’d love to get your story for the mag, maybe do a full feature.”

“A feature would be excellent exposure!”

“Wouldn’t it?” Carl slides up next to her. “We can get you all the exposure you could want Ms. Natalie.”

“Charlie was telling me all about it.” She flashes him a coy smile. “Thank you so much Charlie! I forgot I have a late fitting tonight for another show so I’ve got to run. But we’ll chat soon yeah?”

“Absolutely! It was so good to meet you Natalie.”

“Same! Bye!” She hurries through the crowded room and disappears.

“Busy girl.” Carl quips. “Whiskey?” You look down at the glass by your hand.

“Some guy sent them over,” you gesture to Natasha’s lipstick stained glass. “Seemed rude to refuse. Can’t stand the stuff though.”

“That’s a mans drink,” Carl laughs at his own perceived joke and you force a smile.

Somehow you make it through the rest of the evening. You’d refused to allow yourself to hope that she’d be here, too obvious to come the same night, better to wait. Kicking off your shoes you head straight to the mini bar and crack open a whiskey, downing it in one gulp.

“You really need to be more careful,” Natasha’s voice comes from the bathroom. “I mean not even checking around. Sloppy.”

“Charlie Daniels doesn’t have to check for Russian assassins in her bathroom,” a smile pulls your face so tight it hurts.

“Well, Natalie Rushman isn’t a Russian spy. So…”

You let your real accent resurface as you pull her into your arms, “Natalie Rushman, I don’t know if that’s clever or lazy.” She kisses you hard, tongue sliding over your lips hands gripping your ass.

“Mmm,” she hums. “Kinda like the accent.”

“Oh?” You revert to the clipped posh Londoner sound. “Would you rather be with Charlie? I hate to break it to you, she’s strictly into dick so you may need to get a bit creative.”

Natasha’s head falls back with laughter, “I’m always into a challenge but,” she cups your face in her hands, “I’d much rather Y/N, she’s got a cute accent too.” Your kiss is soft this time, “I missed you.”

“I missed you too, honey.” Gently you push a strand of hair out of her face. “Is this smart? Are you gonna get-”

“I’m good. I wouldn’t be here if I thought there was risk.” She pulls away and tugs you toward the bed. “There’s no surveillance on me here, I check in every week, that’s it. This is strictly to build a cover.”

“Cover for what?” She gives you a sideways glance. “Right. National security.”

“Do you really want to talk about work?”

Smirking at her you push her back on the bed. “Maybe later.”

You lean down to her but she stops you by planting a strappy heel in the center of your chest. Trailing your fingers down her leg you snag a knife from her thigh holster. Carefully you slide the blade under the straps, the incredibly sharp edge cuts through the thin suede like it’s nothing.

“Those were very expensive you know,” eyes sparkling with desire.

You slip the shoe off and toss it aside. “I’ll buy you a new pair.” Your lips press against her ankle.  

Everything in your life until her was so fleeting. Even your own name, the sound of your own voice, who you were… But with her, you were grounded. You weren’t anything but her’s, you were Y/N.

Suddenly you’re overwhelmed. Caressing her muscular calf you just stare at her eyes. Emerald green, dark liner, lids heavy with lust and exhaustion.

“Natasha…” Your voice cracks and you fight for composure.

“Y/N? What is it?” She shoots up, cradling your face in her hands.

You shake your head, unable to really find the words and unwilling to send this storm of emotions to her. “I just…” You cover her hands with your own. It’s not that you don’t want her, you do. But…

“Can we just… I just wanna hold you…” Her expression immediately softens, eyes sparkling a touch with tears. “Sorry… I… I just…”

“I’d love that, baby.” Tenderly her lips brush yours, then your cheeks, your forehead, your eyelids as they flutter closed.

You shed your clothes and crawl into the plush bed. Holding tight to one another you spend hours drifting in and out of sleep, covering the other with soft kisses. Before the sun rises your hands wander southward.

This time you don’t fuck one another senseless. It feels like you’re trying to memorize every curve, every sound, every subtle thing that marks being together. You both know you many not get to do this for some time. The knowledge aches but it doesn’t make having her any less sweet.

Post Snap

You lean your head back on the wall behind the booth. The crying man from last night is gone, you find yourself hoping that he’s resting peacefully somewhere… even though you know it’s pointless to hope for such things.

There are more people filling the bar than there was before. The TVs are off, radios turned up, reporters frantically trying to determine what happened. It was global, that was clear. All planes grounded, trains stopped, communications spotty due to damaged cell towers.

A man speaks frantically to someone who seems to be a friend that he was heading to Nuremberg from Budapest, how the roads are almost not navigable. He doesn’t know if his family is even still there but he has to find out.

Despite his distress, your lips curl a bit at the mention of Budapest.

[sophygurl]

Did my what’s coming up on TV quarterly-ish organizational project and re-did my shows I watch page. Figured it would be a good time to make an update post on my media consumption of late.

I’m still embroiled in the Big Brother season. It’s been a pretty terrible season truth be told, and I’d have noped out except for there being one houseguest left in there that I adore and want to support, and of course the fan community I have (a chat room I’ve been in for a decade now and also a twitter list of fans, update sites, and BB alum I enjoy interacting with). We’ve still got a ways to go, and I am not watching the live feeds much this season, but still watching the shows (mostly to chat with my friends about) and keeping up with the feeds via twitter to see what’s happening and watching the few small clips of that one hg i still enjoy. 

It’s an interesting thing when being part of a fandom starts to feel like a chore. Like, yes, you do this for entertainment purposes and could stop at any point when it stops being fun for you - but you do also create a community around you and half the fun is that community interaction and it’s harder to let go of that. Because you can’t generally pack that whole community up and take them to another show or experience with you. 

Another fan experience that was a let-down this summer was Veronica Mars. I won’t post any spoilers in case there is anyone out there yet who wants to watch S4 unspoiled and has yet to find out what happened, but suffice to say I am not pleased. 

I did enjoy most of the series right up until the ending. I know a lot of people are upset about other things that happened, but I can defend or at least explain most of that based on what the show and the characters have always been. But that ending. Wow. I am still recovering. And not at all interested in a season 5 or really anything else that Rob Thomas might want to work on in the future. He’s really ruined any fan goodwill he had in my eyes. 

Other TV shows I’ve been enjoying this summer: 

The 100 delivered another fascinating season. I know the show is problematic in a number of ways, but it still has such wonderful characters with incredible arcs of growth and struggle and learning to overcome together. The plots get wilder and wilder, but whatever, I’m along for the ride. 

Agents of Shield was ... interesting. I don’t even know what to say about it anymore, tbh.

American Princess on Lifetime was a surprisingly fun new show - a NY socialite runs off on her wedding day and ends up at a Ren Faire, where she meets new friends and decides to stay and create a new life for herself. It’s charming, sweet, romantic, funny, and fun for any found family fans. 

BH90210′s pilot episode cracked me tf up. I kind of can’t believe the cast is going along with this satirical version of playing themselves trying to get a reboot of the original show going. It’s soapy and campy and so delightfully weird, while also being nostalgic. Can’t wait to see what they do with it. (Also I miss Luke Perry enormously)

Elementary has one episode left and I will be very sad when the story is complete, but happy for everyone involved for having been part of such a unique spin on Sherlock Holmes in such a successful way.

Euphoria season one was an intense emotional process, watching teens and their families struggle with addiction, violence, abusive relationships, sexual discoveries, gender navigation, mental illness, and so much more. Also just a visually stunning show. 

Grand Hotel is a fun soapy new show that I am enjoying very much. Classic soap tropes, a largely Latinx cast, a lesbian main character, and lots of eye candy.

Jane the Virgin put out a wonderful final season and series finale. I laughed. I cried. I was very satisfied. 

Killjoys has started up it’s final season. I’m loving it, but I also wanna cling to it and scream “no! don’t go!” 

Pandora is a new show on the CW, which is interesting. Futuristic space academy featuring a clone, a mind reader, an augmented human, an alien from a planet we were recently at war with, and Pandora herself who has some kinda mystery surrounding her and the recent death of her parents. Lots of political intrigue and conspiracy, with episodic plots that the young adults uncover together each week, and just about every sci-fi trope you could think of being covered. 

Trinkets on Netflix was a cute lil show about teenage girls in a shoplifting support group. It was a really genuine look at the highs and lows of female friendship at that age. 

In other TV watching news, I finally got all of the Northern Exposure DVDs and am doing a long-awaited re-watch of my all-time favorite show. I’m on the second season. 

In addition to completing that DVD collection, I also completed collecting all of the Realm of the Eldering books (yay birthday money!) and am doing my re-read of those. It’s going to take me a long time, because my re-reading gets done while attempting to fall asleep and also when I wake up trying to get back to sleep, so depending on how the insomnia is going, it could be anywhere from a couple of paragraphs to maybe 50 pages tops per night and RotE is a looooot of books. I’m still on the first novel now. 

That also means, I am taking a little break from my otherwise-continual Raven Cycle re-reading lol. 

Other stuff I’ve been reading - started the Wayward Children series by Seanan McGuire, finished Tamora Pierce’s Emelan series (although I think she’s writing one more of those yet), and got caught up on Patricia Brigg’s Mercyverse series. Then, since I’m caught up on all the series I’m reading (other than Wayward Children since I just started it), I went and put a crapton of new books on my library hold list - some of which are the first books in series themselves. So here we go! 

And of course, I’ve been playing lots of Sims. Love love loving the Island Living expansion pack. The mermaids are so much fun, as is swimming and boating in the ocean, other beach activities, and just living in a more communal setting (people show up to help put out fires, bring food over randomly, fix things that are broken, etc.). I definitely won’t tire of the stuff in this pack before the next new pack comes out, which I imagine will be sometime late this fall or early winter, if they go according to the usual schedule. 

Guess that’s all for now. Might do some more specific VMars meta at some point, once I get my thoughts and feelings more collected. IDK. This post is so all over the place I’m not sure if I’m gonna tag it with any specific fandom or media.