#we could end up paying even more thousands for private blood tests because going privately does not make you eligible for nhs blood tests
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tesco-finest-aromantics · 2 years ago
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hhhrrrrrr why is medical transition so complicated in this country
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angryschnauzer · 3 years ago
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In case anyone is remotely interested, here’s what happened with my operation being cancelled, and a few other bits of emotional crap.
TW: Eating disorders, TW: Depression, TW: Period and Uterus Talk, TW: Fatphobia
Okay so i was scheduled to have my hysterectomy Yesterday, late afternoon. It had already been rescheduled once by the hospital due to lack of support staff due to covid. Okay, not their fault, and it was rescheduled accordingly. Over the last three weeks i went through a number of invasive tests; blood tests, physicals, ECG (electrocardiogram - where they test/view your heart), breathing tests, vaginal examinations, full covid tests. I was literally at the hospital every other day for some test or another.  The morning of the day before my operation i get a call from the Anaesthetist, he had taken one look at my BMI and said he wasn’t willing to do the operation. I’m too high risk. Although i accept his decision, it was the fact we were told the day before the operation, we had isolated our family twice at that point in preparation for the operation. I had messed my own customers around with my business with ‘i’m shutting, no i’m not, yes i am, no i’m not, yes i am’ in the busiest time of the year for my industry. I’ve lost a quarter of my year’s earnings in lost sales or jobs i’ve had to turn down. So to be told at such short notice was pretty devastating. I’m furious that this pivotal decision was so late in the planning, that i was made to go through all the tests, that we had even moved to that particular hospital because they were apparent experts on high BMI patients. We’d even upgraded our medical insurance to cover that hospital. Through every test i’d done i was given a glowing report, i was ‘fit and healthy’, and when seen in person the staff could see that the bulk of my blubber wasn’t in the high risk places such as chest/torso/neck). Literally at every turn i was given the green light. But no, this guy was able to derail my health by looking at two digits on a piece of paper. He went on to explain that i needed the procedure to be done at a NHS hospital, rather than a private hospital, because NHS hospitals have larger intensive care departments, but i would have to be a ‘private’ patient to get jumped to the front of the queue. A loophole of the NHS is that if you so wish to, you can pay for private staff to come in and use the facilities. However that side of it isn’t covered by our medical insurance, so we’ll have to go back to trying to find £14000. Yes, fourteen thousand pounds. That’s more than my yearly salary.
I’m literally now back at square one. Apart from the fact i now have a nice big bill for the tests at the private hospital i’ve already had to do, because as the procedure is no longer going ahead, my insurance isn’t going to cover it. So that’s another £1500 to cover those. 
I’m just so tired of it all. It was such an emotional strain, to psyche myself up to have what is a dangerous operation, to accept that i may not survive it, but to look at the risks vs the benefits. And to also mentally come to terms with the fact i am making the final decision with regards to ending my motherhood journey. I have one amazing son, but to make that final call of ‘definitely no more babies’ its a very tough call to make. I won’t lie, the last three days have been very tough. I have felt like my depression came back like a tsunami, suddenly the rug was pulled from under my feet and i was back in darkness again. All the old self demons came rushing back, my brain telling me to starve myself, that i must loose weight - which yes would make things a lot easier - rushing into an unhealthy (mentally) place and doing stupid fad diets is not the way forward; i fought off an eating disorder twice before, i do not want to go back to it again as i don’t think i’ve got the strength to do it a third time.
So now i want to fight, but i’m just so so very tired. I want to work but my uterus is making my periods so heavy i’m constantly suffering from severe anaemia and gives me fatigue. That pushes my blood pressure up which causes all sorts of horrible side affects like insomnia, which makes me even more tired. And then someone says ‘get more exercise’! Bitch, if i could make it up two flights of stairs i’d be lucky.
Well that’s it. That’s where i’m at. 
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Love and kisses
Mama Schnauz
xxx
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chayacat · 3 years ago
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Devil’s Sweet Star (38)
Fandom: Dead by Daylight
Ghostface x Female Reader  
Rated M for Violence, Language and Smut  
***
Soon. Soon, death will strike with its vengeful and saving scythe. Soon the blood will flow, in a golden setting. soon... Danny will kill Hoggins. After tomorrow, in the evening, to be more precise. But before that, the festival. Tomorrow, Danny will have to do everything possible to stay focused for article on the Roseville Festival. Mattew and Melina will be there to support him, but he is the one who will take the pictures. And he will have to take a lot of them. He will not really have time to enjoy it unfortunately. Especially since they will not be the only journalists on the spot, newspapers from other cities will be there too. It will be an opportunity to see new faces... and if possible, to have an exit door. Because if he can impress these journalists, maybe they'll offer Danny to come and work with them? Maybe.
The police will also be present to monitor the central square. Wilhelm too, unless he was too busy with Hoggins. But there will be at least one inspector, that's for sure. It remains to be seen who it will be. And you will be there, holding your stand, selling your pastries with your two employees. Just like Danny, you won't be able to enjoy the festival fully but it doesn't matter, you can always have a little party... in private.
Besides, Danny thinks back to last night. He appreciated that you were more playful, more enterprising with him. It amused him a lot. A sneaky smile stretched on his face; he already imagined all the little "games" that you could both play. But he will start slowly, he would not want to destroy everything. Mattew comes to rest next to him, sighing completely exhausted.
“Did you get up on the wrong foot?” asks Danny.  
“No, the boss wanted to see me for tomorrow... he told me to focus on the festival and not on the stands to eat. But if there is the pastry stand of (Y/N) I will not be able to resist! He knows it! I would like to see him in my place, I am sure he would do the same!” responds Mattew sulking.  
“Haha it's clear, but he's not wrong especially that other journalists will be there as well, we have to look good in front of them. But don't worry, I'm sure (Y/N) will still have a lot of cakes for us. And then you can taste his famous cake. I can't wait to see what it will look like in the end.”
“Besides, how does it work in your new apartment? doesn't that make you weird all this space?” replied Mattew.
“Very well, very well... it’s true that at the beginning it was strange to live together when we used to live each on our own. But we get used to it. And then... we have several opportunities to... test the resistance of the bed, if you know what I mean.” responds Danny, smiling jokingly.
Mattew looked at Danny with big eyes while Melina who was passing by at the same time started laughing. Danny also laughed as he patted the shoulder on his colleague who was still shocked. All three took a coffee break to chat a little, while enjoying the fresh air... of the air conditioner. It was a little hot today and, in the offices, even more. So, the air conditioner was welcome. They meet Nancy, the newcomer of the team. The poor woman was lost, until now she had only done odd cleaning jobs despite her diploma as a journalist. She wore small round glasses, her black hair tied in a ponytail gave her a little schoolgirl side or the cliché of shy and clumsy women. Afterwards, the poor woman was really clumsy. How many times has she dropped her coffee? too many times to remember. And it had only been a week since she was there.
“Have you heard the latest news about Hoggins? Apparently other former collaborators are ready to testify against him if there is ever a trial. From what some have said, Hoggins has been manipulating people for years and years to get them to invest in his business and mysteriously they have all sunk. He even did it with foreign collaborators. What a son of a bitch.” Said Melina.  
“He really fucked the whole world this guy it's not possible. Let him be fucked up in prison once and for all! The prisoners will take care of him! If you see what I mean...” responds Mattew.  
“The famous trick of the soap?”
“I would rather say the famous Swiss army knife trick. It's very easy to get one in without being noticed in prison... I've seen that before.” Replied Danny, sipping his coffee.  
“What? have you ever been to prison?” asks Melina shocked
“Yes. When I started my job as a journalist, me and my superior at the time went to a prison to interview a prisoner who was wrongly accused. And we took the opportunity to write about what was happening in prison. At one point I turned my head towards one of the cells, and I saw one of the prisoners pull out a knife that he had had hidden in a banana bread.”
“A great classic that. I am still amazed to see that the prison guards are not more on their guard than that...”
Danny shrugged his shoulders; he was not surprised. As it did not surprise him if these same prisoners managed to escape. But because they are idiots, they end up in prison again for the same crime. Dumbass. Danny never got caught at least. At the same time, he did everything to never get noticed or arrested. And yet he left from afar! He learned on his own... and he was lucky. And he intends to keep his chance with him... Oh, yes.  
Observing through the window, Danny noticed that the city was adorned with a thousand colours. The last banners were hung, the leaflets distributed, the posters glued. Tomorrow, Roseville would have been in existence for exactly 32 years. And Mayor Tallis is the one who runs this city... This man is truly an impressive person. And respectable. It’s perhaps the only one that is respectable in this city.  After you.
Our trio went back to work, each on their article, Danny on Hoggins' article. So, he's hated all over the world... In a sense it wouldn't be so bad if Hoggins stayed alive. it could be the scoop of the century! the case that could boost his career! Imagine how sensational a trial article could be. Especially if it's Danny who writes it. Even if he is a murderer, this is not a reason to abandon those why he spent his youth and his studies. He has to work hard, very hard even to get to this point! While Danny was working, his phone rang. A hidden number? That's not a good sign... unless it’s still these sellers who are trying to bait you with their stupid products.
“Roseville’s Gazette, Jed Olsen on the phone, what can I do for you?” said Danny.
“Hi..."Olsen".” responds a man voice.
“Hoggins. How did you get my number?”
“I have my sources as well. But you suspect that I am not calling you out of pure courtesy.”
“Gets straight to the point. What do you want?” replied Danny.  
“Leave this girl. Otherwise, you'll regret it bitterly little asshole. You don't realize who you're dealing with...” responds Hoggins.
“No, I think it's YOU who don't know who you're dealing with. And believe me I intend to make you pay for it. The prisoners will take good care of you, when the court will sentence you to jail for fraud, plus a voluntary homicide... You are cooked Hoggins. You can hide, you can lie as much as you want, you will not be able to escape your destiny. If Ghostface does not decide to kill you for copying its modus operandi. Because he attacked poor people for a few days... because of you. He can't stand being robbed of the show. Now if you excuse me... I have a job to do. Oh, and one last thing...” said Danny Before taking on a more menacing tone: “If you dare to threaten MY girlfriend again... it’s not her who will have an accident. But you.”
Danny hung up dryly, leaving Hoggins no time to say anything. This guy doesn't lack grit decidedly... he will have been a strong opponent, Danny must admit. But not enough to survive any longer. He sent an email to Wilhelm where he explained everything that was said in the conversation between him and Hoggins. Like that, it will make one more ball at the foot of this son of a bitch.  
The rest of the day went smoothly. Mr. Hembrook had summoned Danny to set up tomorrow's day. There will be a total of 4 newspapers, including them, at the festival. It will therefore be necessary to look good! It will also be necessary to take good photos, and to transcribe the speech of Mayor Tallis. Unfortunately, not everyone will be able to come tomorrow. The Gazette must therefore allow these poor people to know what the mayor said for this year's festival.
He worked another hour or two before returning to the apartment. It was quite late, and he had sent you a message to warn you to not wait for him to eat if you were too hungry and he apologized. To which you replied that it didn’t matter, and that you would put a plate aside for him. He parked, entered the building, and went up to the apartment. When he opened the front door, it was dark. no sign of life from you... Until he sees something moving on the couch. When he turned on the light, he sighed as he saw you asleep and, in your pyjama, his coat on you.
“Honey? Honey... Wake up... I'm home.” said Danny.  
“Hm... Jed? Sorry I fell asleep... I'm going to make you warm up your plate... I hope you like Udons...” you respond rubbing your eyes.
“You should go to bed instead... you barely stand. You must have had a big day. I'll take care of everything don't worry about it... I join you after eating and after a good shower.”  
You nod by yawning, which made Danny laugh. He placed a kiss on your forehead before letting you go to your room. Poor of you.... you are exhausted. He warmed up his dish of Udons and moved to his office to work. He worked for an hour, then he left his office by locked it, made the dish, took clean clothes and went to shower. He changed, and walked into the room, to find you asleep in bed, Danny's cushion in your arm like a stuffed animal. You're so cute... He gently regained his cushion, putting himself in the place of the latter in your arms. He laughed lightly when he saw your arms tighten around his waist, and he placed a kiss on your cheek before turning and stalling in bed.
He looked at his phone for about ten minutes, just to find sleep, which eventually happened. He thought back to the conversation with Hoggins. If only he knew what awaited him... if only he knew... But that would spoil the surprise. 2 Days... it's going to be a long time. But the most amusing thing will not be hoggins' death. The most fun will be your reaction. And whatever your reaction, he's ready to react. For good and for worse. A little conversation between Danny and Jed is in order.
“Everything is ready for your little massacre?” said Jed calmly.
“You don't seem to object to it this time... Jed.” Responds Danny.
“Don't claim victory too quickly, I'm not for that kind of thing... But here Hoggins touches on something precious. Or rather someone. As much for me as for you. And I'm not going to let him do it.”
“No, it's ME who's not going to let him do it. Believe me... you'll enjoy the show too.”
“What's next? What will happen?” replied Jed.  
“I don’t know. We shall see how things develop. In the meantime, we must prepare... as much for tomorrow. That for the day after tomorrow.” responds Jed.  
Yes... we have to be prepared. Because these next two days are going to be intense.
But really delicious.
***
(Phew! this week has been just as busy as the previous one! But I managed to finish this chapter! As for the RE8 fanfic I'm progressing pretty well! I may do a little teaser post to give you an overview! As for the title... I'm stuck. I have three ideas in mind and I can't make up my mind... Help me XD I hope you’ll like this chapter like the others ones! Well, it's time for my brain to rest! Have a great weekend to you all!  See ya!)
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uzumaki-rebellion · 5 years ago
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“Wet Sugar” [Part 29 of 30]
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Summary: Erik and the merc head over to do the London heist and Yani accepts new gifts...
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"The brotha's got this complex occupation The brotha's got this complex occupation The brotha's got this complex occupation
Me and this baby gon' be up all night long Walkin' this wood flo' 'til my man gets home I'm at the front do', I'm listening by the phone But I'm gon' be here with my make-up on It's been a long time since my man been gone But when he get here, you know I won't be gone Because I love him, love him strong Me and this baby gon' be up all night long…"
Erykah Badu—"Danger"
Erik wiped down the modified BCM Reece 14 KMR-A. It was an expensive AR-15. He added an M203 grenade launcher with vibranium alterations. The weapon was a polished obsidian dream in his hands. He had to be prepared for the Black Panther. His own blood relative. Tainted blood.
Linda sat across from him cleaning the other weapons they were bringing with them to Korea. The closer they got to their departure date, the more serious she became. He still found it excruciating to be near her, but he treated her like he treated his past military unit that he hated, just neutral all the way.
Klaue walked into the den a watched them prepare the weaponry. Erik took that moment to grab some papers he held in a folder.
"I need you to sign these so I can get the Cessna."
"Seventy-Five thousand?" Klaue groaned.
"I can get you a new one for Three-Hundred Thousand. It's your money."
"Fine, fine."
Klaue used his alias and didn't even look at the paperwork. Just signed where Erik told him to sign and picked up the AR-15 from the work table.
"You missed your calling. You could make a killing modifying weapons full time."
"I'd get bored too quick."
Klaue's eyes looked past him and onto the viewscreen above the fireplace. He turned up the volume. Erik and Linda stared at it with him.
A weather report indicated the return of the hurricane season. And a large category 4 was headed for the islands along the Atlantic.
"I'm sure you battened down the hatches in St. Thomas, Killmonger?"
"Lock stock and barrel."
At last. A tell on Linda's face. A faint blink of her eyes. Erik caught her eyes with his as she picked up another weapon to clean.
"Looks like it'll be a bad one. Hope Our Lady is prepared for it. One of the pitfalls of island life."
Erik felt his midsection tighten. The last hurricane season had been a lucky one. He wiggled his fingers and kept the focus on the radar images and the predicted touch down points. He'd keep an eye on it. Climate change had made life tricky for people globally. It concerned Erik, but he pressed on and picked up a new weapon to inspect and clean.
Linda stared at him and his face felt open and vulnerable with worry. He looked away from her.
###
"Jesus, you can't be still can yuh?"
Yani pressed her hand into her side. The baby was moving too much for her to get fully comfortable. She sat with her legs lifted up with an ottoman in Twyla's house. Boxes stood unopened around her and she was pleased with the one small box she was able to unpack.
Moving in with Twyla had been a sound financial decision. Her lease to the apartment had become month to month, and Nannette was able to find a new roommate easily. Yani's rent money would help pay Twyla's mortgage, and in exchange, Twyla was able to work fewer hours at her job and watch Sydette so Yani could continue taking summer classes with a full course load. She didn't let her pregnancy stop her from finishing up a summer session. Her medical plans were revamped to include an additional two years to finish her degree. Her mind was set on getting into a residency program by the time the new baby was three. Her grades were exceptional but more important than school-Sydette becoming herself again.
The new baby seemed to focus her daughter's anxiety and fears, and Sweet Pea blossomed once more, so excited to welcome the new dumpling.
"Be still, just for fifteen minutes, please," Yani said to her already big tummy.
Sydette ran over to her and patted her stomach.
"Go to sleep," Sydette said.
"Listen to Sweet Pea, Dumplin'."
"Mama, yuh feet so big."
"A little swelling, love."
Sydette rubbed Yani's left foot.
"Fatty feet!" Sydette giggled.
"You gave me fat feet when you were in mi belly."
"No, I didn't!" Sydette said with a smirk on her face.
"Yeah, yuh did."
The doorbell rang and Yani didn't feel like getting up from her seat.
"Get the door, Sweet Pea. Ask who it is."
Sydette ran to the door.
"Who is it? What yuh want?"
"Sydette—"
"Your Daddy."
Sydette's face beamed.
"Can you twist the button?"
"Yes, Mama. I can do it."
The main bolt on the door was left unlocked for Twyla, but Sydette was able to turn the bottom lock.
Chez stepped into the room and scooped Sydette up in his arms.
"Detty!"
Chez tickled her stomach and Sydette laughed and tried to keep his hands from tickling her further.
"Her bag is by the door," Yani said trying to get up,
"Stay where you are. I got it," he said.
Picking up Sydette's weekend bag, Chez walked near Yani.
"You look big, gyal."
"Thanks, a lot," she said.
"I'm teasing. I'll bring her back early on Sunday."
"Okay."
"Twyla home?"
"No. She'll be back in a few hours? Why?"
"I know she's looking for a car. Wanted to see if she'd want mine."
"You selling it? Thought you loved that car."
Chez put Sydette down and raised up Yani's feet as he sat on the ottoman. He rested her legs on his lap and rubbed her feet for her.
"I'm moving to Florida. Found a good-paying factory job. Good hours. I can still make music. Perform in Miami and on the East coast. It's too expensive to ship my car over. Cheaper to get another car later when I get settled. Money will be tight for a couple of months, but I'll get Sydette's child support to you as soon as can. I have a better shot there."
Yani glanced over at Sydette who held the straps to her weekend bag on her shoulders.
"When are you leaving?"
"Next month."
Yani felt her forehead.
"You should have told us sooner, Chez."
"I just got the call. I have to go where the money is, gyal. You know that. I stay here and you'll bust my ass for not having my full child support."
He held his hands out for Sydette and she skipped over to him and rested her chest on Yani's legs.
"I'm sorry I won't be here to take Detty on the weekends. I can send for her with my sister and keep her at the end of the year once I'm settled—"
"No, this new one will be here then and I need my girl with me."
Yani scratched her belly. Chez stared at her hand.
"Ooh," Yani sighed while shifting her legs on Chez.
"Kicking?"
"Too much," she said.
Yani took in Chez's face. He looked hopeful. Ready to test his wings away from the island. It was bad enough having Sydette lose Killmonger. Now she was losing her biological father to distance and a chance at a better life.
"We will miss you," she said.
Chez's eyes seemed to spark at her words. She saw his eyes well up and she was surprised to see him cover his face with his hand.
"Chez," she whispered.
Sydette crawled up onto Yani's legs and touched her father's face.
"I'm alright Detty," he said lifting her weight off of Yani.
Yani moved her legs from the ottoman and rubbed Chez's back.
"I'm okay, Yani. You ready, Detty?"
"Yes!"
Chez stood with Sydette in his arms. Yani picked up her daughter's bag and handed it back to him.
"We'll talk later, yeah?" Yani said.
"I'll call you next week with more information. I'll be staying with my Uncle until I get my own place there. Say bye, Detty!"
"Bye, Mama."
"Give me kiss."
Sydette leaned over and kissed her on the lips.
"Give Dumplin a kiss."
Chez held Sydette upside down as peals of laughter erupted from her. She kissed Yani's belly.
Watching her daughter leave with Chez, Yani thought of how life changed in the blink of an eye all the time. She rested a hand on her stomach as she stood in the doorway tracking Chez helping Sydette into his car.
"Bye!" Sydette called while waving her hand.
"Bye, Sweet Pea. I'll talk to you tomorrow."
When they left, Yani stood and let the sun warm her face. The baby tumbled and then seemed to settle.
"I wish your daddy was here, Dumplin."
Patting her belly, Yani closed the door trying her best not to dwell on Killmonger for too long.
###
Fuck.
Fuck, fuck, fuck.
Fuck!
Sitting at a table inside a small Swedish café waiting for a sandwich and some decent coffee, Erik's eyes were glued to the tablet in his hand.
"Holy shit," Klaue said staring at Erik's device.
Other people in the café were staring at cell phones or their computers.
Erik couldn't believe it and he felt a cold dragging on his stomach.
He was already agitated watching King T'Chaka receive praise for his rousing speech giving support to signing the Sokovia Accords. The Avengers had made a deadly mess in Nigeria and over one hundred nations decided they needed to be regulated and controlled, and King T'Chaka's words were splashed all over the press. Public and private superheroes and other enhanced humans had to come forward and be counted, tracked, and given permission to act for good in the future. Erik was sure more vigilantes would break out, but he didn't give a fuck because Wakanda was the only thing he wanted. Once he had his father's nation in his hand, he would blow all these enhanced fools out of the water. Take them out if they couldn't bow down to him.
All Erik wanted to do was eat the perfect open-faced smoked-salmon sandwich and spend time out of the house and away from Linda and Limbano. He hadn't planned on watching his Uncle speak at the Vienna International Centre until Klaue told him that the King of Wakanda was on tv.
Regal, gray-haired, with glasses that gave him a gentle grandfatherly look, T'Chaka Udaku told the world how Ultron stole their vibranium and how his country would not stand by and let injustices continue.
The fucking audacity.
And just like that, Erik and the world watched the room explode and the cameras cut to news footage outside. Erik wanted to yell and jammed his nails into his hands to keep himself in his seat as he saw his grip on justice slip from his fingers.
Klaue's face was stuck in the firm grip of shock.
"This is going to change some things, Killmonger," Klaue said.
Words and images flew online fast and the explosion was quickly labeled a terrorist attack.
"There will be a lot of dead in that room, mate."
Rooted in his seat, it was confirmed soon enough.
King T'Chaka Udaku was dead.
Erik stormed out of the café and walked aimlessly through the street for half an hour. His personal cell blew up and when he looked to see who it was, he answered it.
"Uncle Bakari."
"Have you heard?"
"Yes."
"Are you alright? Where are you?"
Erik stopped walking and let the familiar sound of home focus him.
"I'm in Europe now. Saw the news in a café."
"How are you feeling, Nephew?"
"I don't feel nothin'…nothin' at all."
His Uncle knew he was lying. Erik's voice sounded heavy. Brittle.
"Erik…that was your Uncle, your father's brother—"
"That man ain't shit to me!"
People walking past Erik moved around him quickly because of his tone. He headed back to the café.
"I gotta go," Erik said.
"Call me later…if you want to talk. Shavonne and I are here for you."
"Okay."
Erik swiped his phone and he checked his other cell. Two texts from Klaue.
"Hey man, I'm heading back to the café. Had to take a call from home."
"I thought you were taking this explosion a little too hard, mate," Klaue said.
"Like you said, changes some things, but we'll work around it."
"I had the shop put your food in a to-go box. I'm heading back to the house. See you there."
"Cool."
Erik ignored the café and kept walking. His left hand pressed against the left side of his waist in the space he had saved to carve King T'Chaka into his skin. Stolen from him. Whoever the fuck killed his Uncle would feel his wrath eventually, but now Erik had to deal with T'Challa taking the throne.
Erik halted.
His cousin would have to take his father's body back to Wakanda. That would end all of his travels for the next few months. He'd be where Erik wanted him to be. Birnin Zana. The golden city. The terrorists had cheated Erik of one Udaku, but they had also made his endgame easier so he could have the other one. Losing his father in a violent way would have T'Challa rattled, he was sure of that. Erik knew what that felt like. A rattled King would also be a weak King. A distracted King. One who could easily be beaten.
Erik still felt a heaviness in his chest. There was fiery anger there. Something was stolen from him once more. King T'Chaka had escaped his due punishment and it sucked the energy out of Erik. When he returned to their hideout, he climbed the stairs ignoring everyone else and went to his room, throwing himself on his bed. His mind wouldn't let his body rest and he stayed up all night clenching and unclenching his fists. He tugged on the silver chain around his neck until his fingers clasped onto his father's ring.
###
The museum added additional security two days before the opening of the African Antiquities exhibit.
Linda was able to get a job as a barista there and spent a day walking the entire museum taking more secretive photos to make sure nothing had changed since Erik had surveyed it the previous year. She kept her eye on the lead curator, a grim-lipped white woman with an elitist attitude toward employees.
They hid in a flat less than a mile away from the museum. Erik planned logistics with Klaue and Limbano was able to locate a decommissioned ambulance for cheap purchase from a scrapyard. He also procured EMT uniforms for himself and Klaue.
"That woman is a fucking tyrant!"
Linda stormed into the apartment carrying take out from the corner pub. She went into her bedroom and changed clothes before rushing back out to finish her rant.
"I have never met a person with a stick so far up their ass—"
"Cutthroat museum director getting your dander up again?" Klaue heckled.
Erik and Klaue watched her fume near the window.
"She just does shit to pick on people…for no reason! Every fucking day she gets the same coffee from my section. We know how to make her beverage because she instructs us explicitly down to the most finite detail…and yet…it's never the right way. She's just contrarian for shits and giggles. Jesus, I don't know how regular people can take that day after day."
"But she always comes to you, right?" Erik asked.
"Yeah."
Erik stood up and walked over to her. Reaching into his pocket he handed her a small plastic two-inch bag. A yellowish-white powder sat inside of it.
"What is this meth?" Linda joked.
"On D-Day, put this in her coffee cup. Don't touch it with your hands."
"Fast-acting?"
"Nah. Slow burn. Timing is everything. The moment she sips, you hit me up."
Linda pocketed the poison and grabbed her take out container. She scarfed down a sausage sandwich.
"The plane is ready for Busan," Erik said.
"Limbano will take it over and secure housing," Klaue said.
"I have enough surveillance footage looped. Their security is very sensitive, so you will have a little over an hour to get in and out without them suspecting anything on their feed," Linda said.
Klaue stared at his phone.
"I'm trying to get some intel on Jo'Burg, but Huntsman has been avoiding me," he said.
Another tell.
Linda took a large bite of her sandwich and then wiped her lips as she stared at Klaue attempting to contact the dead merc. There was a lack of confidence in her eyes. A hint of…worry? When she stopped looking at Klaue her eyes darted up and Erik stood in front of her with a can of beer in his hand.
"Maybe he has another gig that he can't get out of," Erik said.
Linda's face froze, but then she reached for the beer and took it from him. He reached into her take-out container and grabbed a few fried chips. Popping them in his mouth, he kept his gaze on her, until she stood up to throw away her empty container.
"Well I need him," Klaue said.
Linda left the room and Erik turned on his laptop and studied the museum layout. The moment Linda fed the poison to the curator, Erik would have to maneuver himself into the exhibit hall, find the vibranium, and make sure the curator stayed near him. Reconnaissance video showed that she hovered throughout the space ninety-percent of the time, and if she was anal about her coffee, she would be anal about hawking his Black ass when he lingered around the room. Once she was down, they'd terminate distractors and make a body switch out into the ambulance smuggling out the vibranium. He just needed to find it quickly.
He switched his screen to the online exhibit brochure and paid attention to the pieces he suspected would be laden with the good stuff.
"What's going on with Bonnie?" Klaue asked.
"Bonnie?"
Klaue pointed to him.
"You're Clyde…she's Bonnie…for fucks sake. Bonnie and Clyde?"
Erik rolled his eyes.
"You two getting along?"
"Yeah."
"She seems distant…not distant…more like preoccupied."
Erik shrugged.
"She seems normal to me."
"Keep an eye on her."
"You getting bad vibes or something?"
"Not sure. I feel like she tiptoes around you. The usual banter between you two seems forced. Not as playful as it used to be."
"I think she's stressed because we are dealing with the C.I.A. now. A lot more hoops to jump through with them once we arrive in Busan."
"I don't think that's it."
"Want me to ask her what's up?"
"Yeah. If things are shaky—"
"I'll take care of it if it is."
Klaue patted Erik's thigh in an off-hand gesture as he stood up.
"Good boy," he said walking over to the window and pulling out a cigar from his shirt pocket.
###
Erik pulled on the non-prescription glasses once he arrived by taxi to the museum.
He made sure to pass by Linda's coffee cart as he strolled into the building. She had already looped the security feed. The morning crowd was gone and the afternoon patrons trickled in. A free public lecture on Benin art attracted a large crowd. He tapped an earbud in his right ear.
"Miss Sunshine has sipped her special brew," Linda said, "she's heading your way."
Erik slowed down and pretended to be interested in an oil painting. The museum director took another sip of her coffee and spotted Erik lingering. He eased away from the painting and headed toward the West African exhibit area. From his peripheral, he saw the director locked on him along with some suited security that tried to look discreet.
The moment he entered the exhibit hall, he steered himself to a glass exhibit displaying a few masks and metal spears. His vibram tattoo didn't itch, and the reflection of the glass showed the director's approach. Another white man in a suit and tie watched him also, his fingers clasped in front of him.
"Good morning, how can I help you?"
Her voice sounded annoyed. Erik turned his head to the left and looked at her with a smile on his face. Her eyes saw his gold slugs and he saw the internal shift she made to deal with him.
"I'm just checkin' out these artifacts. They tell me you're the expert"
"Ah, you could say that…"
Erik skillfully nudged her toward the display he was after. The itch in his gums let him know he had hit jackpot when he read the title cards. Aunt Serah was a fucking boss. Vibranium hidden as a mislabeled Fula hammer. Ole girl rubbed her stomach. Erik knew the poison was waking up in her body. She sounded so confident telling him where she thought the hammer came from. The bitch probably worked Aunt Serah's nerves.
"Nah…"
Her eyes glared at him and her mouth gave a small quirk as if she wanted to burp but couldn't.
"I beg your pardon," she said, her voice sounding surprised.
Erik gave her a quick once over.
"It was taken by British soldiers in Benin, but it's from Wakanda…and it's made out of vibranium."
The rasp in his voice startled her and she clutched her stomach a little harder.
Erik smirked.
"Don't trip, I'ma take it off your hands for you."
"These items aren't for sale."
She elongated the word sale in a way meant to put Erik in his place. The slow rise of heated anger rose in his gut. Fucking thieves.
"How do you think your ancestor's got these? You think they paid a fair price? Or did they take it like they took everything else?"
The bite in his voice startled her. He saw one of the security men inch closer to them.
"Sir I'm going to have to ask you to leave…"
Her voice stopped and she looked toward her minions as she coughed. Erik stepped in close and whispered in her ear.
"You got all this security in here watching me…ever since I walked in. But you ain't checkin' for what you put in your body."
The director gasped and looked at her coffee cup.
"Klaue and Limbano are in position," Linda said in his ear.
Erik smiled.
"C'mon mate…"
A security guard tugged on Erik's jacket, pulling him away from the distressed director.
"I think she might not be feelin' too good…"
The director dropped like a pile of bricks hitting the floor.
"Jam those phones, Linda," Erik whispered.
Erik called for help loudly as three security men surrounded the director on the floor.
"Klaue, Limbano…you're on deck," Linda said.
Less than five minutes later Klaue and Limbano came running in with a stretcher.
"Step back please, gents, step back please," Klaue yelled.
The guards ushered museum-goers toward the exit in the opposite direction. Erik lingered and watched Klaue.
Pistols with high-grade silencers were used to take out two of the guards. Klaue toyed with the third giving the man false hope of survival.
"You can go, but just don't tell anyone, alright?"
Klaue winked at the guard and the man took off running. He let him get twenty feet away before he nickeled the man's brains. The body fell hard.
"Bruh, why you ain't just shoot him right here?"
"Because it's better to leave the crime scene more spread out…makes us look like amateurs."
"I'll meet you guys outside," Linda said in his ear.
"Let's do this," Erik said, guiding Klaue to the vibranium.
Klaue took off the glove on his prosthetic hand and held it up to the exhibit. A sonic pulse shattered the glass and Klaue grabbed the Wakandan hammer. He used his pulse sensors to gently shake off centuries of rust and grit and history. He smelled the metal and laughed.
"You better sell that quick."
"Oh it's already sold," Klaue said bragging. He broke the handle off of the tool and glanced at Limbano to move.
A mask caught Erik's eyes.
He moved over to the standing display and leaned down to look it over carefully.
Regal horns crowned the top as intricate and very detailed carving told a bold story on the blue and steel gray stained wood. The title card said "Warrior Mask, Benin 17th Century". Erik snatched the mask off the metal rod it sat on.
"You're not telling me that's vibranium too, eh?"
"Nah, I'm just feelin' it."
###
Yani's favorite part of laundry day was pulling clean clothes out of the dryer and then folding them. Especially when she tossed in a laundry freshener sheet and everything smelled extra clean.
A clean rain fell outside as she put away Sydette's clothes and her own. She had even washed some of her daughter's old newborn outfits that she would use for Dumplin.
Sydette was sound asleep on her bed in the room she shared with Yani, and once everything was put away, Yani waddled out to the living room where Twyla was braiding Leona's hair and watching tv.
Yani stepped into the kitchen to make herself some fresh cocoa on the stove. She put milk in a saucepan on low and closed the kitchen window. The baby was resting easy inside of her. The day had been a calm one lugging that child inside of her around. One day she would see her feet again and be reacquainted with her toes.
"Yani!"
Twyla's loud shriek startled her and Yani moved as fast as she could back into the living room. Leona was grabbing the remote from Twyla and turning the sound up. The BBC news was on. Klaue's picture took up half the screen on the wall.
"Them find his body," Leona said.
"Shh! Let's hear it," Twyla hissed.
A British-Indian woman anchor told a horrible narrative and Yani wanted to cover her ears, but she stood with a heavy belly, wide-eyed and mouth open as the world was informed that the notorious arms dealer, Ulysses Klaue of South Africa, was found dead in Korea with two others. A woman. And another man. All of Klaue's business was put out into the world and even Twyla's face showed shock because of what the man was accused of doing for so many years. Killing. Arms dealing. Illegal transactions all over the world.
It was all sordid and nasty and so much more horrifying seeing it on the tv.
Killmonger was part of that, and now—
"Yani!"
Twyla moved away from the chair Leona sat in and grabbed Yani's shoulders and eased her onto the couch.
"I'm okay, I just felt a little faint," Yani said.
The headline news moved on to other things and Leona turned down the sound and switched channels.
"They didn't say his name," Yani insisted out loud.
"Calm down," Twyla said.
"They just said Klaue, and then a man and a woman. And there were no photos of him."
Her voice took on a pleading quality.
"Something's burning," Leona said rushing into the kitchen.
"Him not dead. He can't be—"
"They didn't say his name, so no one knows."
"I can look online."
Yani tried to get up, but her weight made it hard to move quickly enough. She felt the baby kicking her side and she gasped. The sharpness hurt. She had upset Dumplin.
"Relax cuz. Be easy, yeah?"
Yani nodded and leaned back.
"Whatever you were trying to make, that milk is ruined," Leona said.
Yani closed her eyes.
Please let me know you're okay, man.
Other news channels that mentioned Klaue only said the same thing. He was shot and killed and found in Korea. Two other bodies with him.
There was nothing Yani could do. Fretting about it would just get her worked up and the baby would feel it. So she focused on getting through the rest of the day with Sydette. Dinner. Bath time. Storytelling time. Sleep.
Yani curled her body around soft pillows and tried to rest her mind. She had to accept not knowing for sure. In the middle of the night, she lumbered out of bed and went to the living room to look on her laptop for any more information. Just various networks giving brief mentions, and then just as quick as the story came…it went.
A week went by and nothing new was reported. Her Aunt was now unemployed permanently from the man. And poor Jerome. Who would spoil him now if they couldn't walk onto the compound anymore? He would think that everyone abandoned him.
So silly. To worry about an iguana as much as she worried about her baby's father.
She touched her chest as her face grew tight. None of her children had their fathers in their life at that moment. Sydette would see Chez eventually in a few months, but Dumplin? Dumplin just had her.
She groaned and lowered her head. Breathing through her mouth she squeezed her hands into fists.
"Oh Lord," she whispered out loud.
She placed her right hand under her stomach.
"Twyla," she called out.
She stood up from the chair in the kitchen.
"Twyla."
"Yeah?"
Her cousin twisted her hair as she stepped into the room.
Yani grabbed a cup and poured water into it from a bottle. She concentrated on swallowing every drop and then turned to face her cousin.
"Dumplin is coming."
"Right now?"
"My contractions are now about thirty minutes apart. I've been keeping track all day."
"All day? You've been in labor all day?"
Twyla's face was bewildered.
"This is baby number two, remember?"
Yani grinned but Twyla's face was still frozen with surprise.
"I'll call Auntie and your Mom."
"Good. I'm going to walk a bit and track my progress while I call my doctor."
"Okay."
Twyla ran to the living room and Yani walked into her bedroom. Sydette was on her bed playing with her dolls.
"Hey, Sweet Pea. Go put your jacket and shoes on. Dumplin is coming."
Sydette's face lit up and she gave a loud whoop as she scrambled to find her shoes.
Yani held both sides of her stomach as she looked down at it.
"Hold on. Give me some time to get to the hospital, yeah?"
Sydette ran out of the room.
"Auntie! Auntie! The baby is coming!"
Yani smiled.
"Take your time, Dumplin. No rush, love. I'm here for you."
###
She was so tired.
By the time the last relative left the house and Sydette was put to bed sound asleep, Yani was able to sit in her new rocking chair and feed the baby. Fourth day home with the newborn and every relative had finally gotten a chance to see the bad man on the hill's child.
Dumplin.
Erik Paradise Galiber-Stevens.
Affectionately known as Riki by the rest of the family.
Nine pounds, four ounces.
Twyla took one look at him and exclaimed, "Dumplin? Tuh, this child is a beef patty."
The boy had the lustiest cry when he came out from between Yani's legs. Twyla cried the entire time she held Yani's hand in her private maternity room. Sydette had a side seat to watch everything and she was a better coach than her cousin. Her mother held Sydette and when her baby brother came out heavy and healthy, Sweet Pea shouted, "Don't cry, I'll help you!"
She had to have stitches, but she was glad that the birth wasn't as labor intensive as Sydette's had been. By the time she was rolled into the hospital to have him, Riki was out three hours later. Fat, vibrant, and restless. Arms and legs constantly moving like he had somewhere to go.
"Are you still sure about 'Paradise'?" Twyla said watching her breastfeed her son.
"What's wrong with that for a middle name? He was conceived in paradise and I want him to know that. What do you think it should be?"
"Lil Big Nigga—"
"Shut up!"
"He on them titties like his Daddy—"
"Twyla!"
"You know it's true."
"Nasty."
"Runs in the family. Before I forget—"
Twyla walked into her room and came back with a handful of mail.
"This all came to Auntie's house addressed to you. It was forwarded from your old place. All your bills."
Yani tilted Riki's head back and wiped his lips.
"Can you burp him for me?"
Yani took the mail as Twyla took the baby.
"Oh, stop fussing, you can have them titties again in a minute, greedy boy. Yuh Mama not going anywhere…Yani…what is it?"
"This came from Korea."
Yani felt her heart patter a little faster.
The manilla envelope had a typed address label on it for her apartment. The return address was written in Korean. The stamped date was recent. Five days previous.
"Open it," Tywla encouraged.
Yani took her time tearing open the flap. She took a deep breath and pulled out several sheets of heavy paper. She stared at them, looking over every single one carefully. When she lifted her eyes up to Twyla, she could barely breathe.
"Yuh scaring me cuz."
Yani was still in pain from having the baby, so she couldn't jump up like she wanted. She opened her mouth but she couldn't get words out.
"Yani…fuck…what is it?"
"Me and Auntie…"
"You and Auntie what?"
"We own the compound. These are deeds to all three houses."
Yani stared at the thick papers.
"Auntie gets the first house. I get Klaue's house, and we both share the middle house. It's the fucking deeds. We own everything free and clear."
"Yuh fucking lying!"
Riki whimpered from the volume of Twyla's voice.
"Killmonger did this. I know it. It's Klaue's signature on the transfer of everything, but…this is Killmonger."
Yani stared at her newborn son, his silky curls, button nose, full lips, and bright brown eyes so perfect. So much like his father.
"Dumplin, your Daddy gave us everything."
Part 30 Conclusion HERE
###
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forever-rogue · 6 years ago
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Always You
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A/N: So here is my response to that anon challenge! Consider it my birthday present to all of you guys for always being here and supporting me! Happy birthday to all of us! The dialogue prompts are listed below. Enjoy!! xx
6. “You are actually Satan, oh my god.”
8. “Wow, I am so in love with you… just wow.”
13. “Because I’m Batman? Duh?”
30. “You’re allowed to be happy, y’know.”
68. “If you tell anybody, no one will find your remains.”
69. “C’mon give me a chance!”
78. “Shit, that’s a lot of blood…”
87. “Do you miss her?”
100. “Didn’t know you wanted to get into my pants that badly.”
Pairing: Roger Taylor (can be read as Ben!Roger) x Reader
Warnings: Language, Innuendo (?)
Word Count: 3.3k
MASTERLIST
Y/N sat on the couch quietly, staring at the television set, not paying attention to the movie that was playing. She'd even it a thousand times already, but the wanted the noise. Otherwise it would be too quiet and she'd get even further into her own thoughts. And that wasn’t a place she was eager to go to.
She had been sitting there, frozen with sadness, anger, and worry for several hours, crying silently to herself. She had just gotten home from breaking up her scumbag of a boyfriend, who had not only cheated on her, but left her with a pregnancy scare to deal with all by herself - she had refused to tell anyone. 
And when she had confronted him about cheating on her, suddenly it became her fault. It’s because you never loved me - you’re still in love with that Roger Taylor. He hadn’t been wrong. But it still wasn’t right for him to cheat. 
"Y/N?" she closed her eyes, dabbing at the few remaining tears as the sound of her name off Roger's tongue brought her back into reality. She had hoped to avoid him, or at least not let him see her in this sorry state “hey, pretty girl, what’s going on?”
"Hi," she croaked out, slowly opening her own eyes up, meeting Roger's. Her throat felt dry and scratchy from her crying. She hadn’t muttered so much as a word in hours, "how long have you been home?"
"About ten minutes. I've been trying to get your attention...but you just...what happened, love?" he asked, making quick work of going into the kitchen and grabbing her a glass of water. She gratefully took the glass and downed it, glad for the relief on her parched throat. She set the emptied glass down and sighed, laying back against the couch with a heavy heart.
Roger watched her, eyes scanning over her slightly trembling body, a small trashcan next to her. He stood up and glanced at it. There were several boxes from the pregnancy tests she had taken and bloody tissues covering the surface “shit, that’s a lot of blood…”
"It's from my nose. Don’t worry, no one got in fight. Although I should have clocked that idiot," she said, following his eyes, knowing he'd discover the inevitable. She had hoped to avoid it but knowing Roger, he wouldn't drop it, "I gave myself a nosebleed from crying too much. Nothing to fret over. Happy now?"
"No, absolutely not. I'm not happy seeing my best friend like this," he sighed as he plopped on the couch next to her. His eyes fell on the small stick on the table. The lump in this throat rose and he was barely able to swallow it, "that's a pregnancy test."
"Yes," it hadn't been a question, a statement rather. 
"Are you...please don’t tell me you’re pregnant,” his voice was barely avoid a whisper as he waited with baited breath for her response, “I think I’d have to go and kill him if you were.”
"No," she answered quickly. The idea that she could have been pregnant by her awful now ex-boyfriend had been hard enough, "thankfully, I'm not. We can all breathe easy.”
"Thank God," he sighed as he leaned back on the couch. Roger didn't know if he had ever hated anyone more than Y/N's latest boyfriend...or any of her boyfriends. 
Not only was he completely in love with her, but he had to see her with a man that treated her like garbage. He had eagerly encouraged her to break up with him, even offering to go and beat the shit out of him. But Y/N had told him not to, claiming it was her own battle, “I don’t know what I would have done if you were...”
“How do you think I feel?” she made a sound somewhere between a snort and saddened laughter.
He had been encouraged her to break up with him since they had been together. At first Y/N was annoyed that Roger, her best friend for over a decade, had been so unsupportive, but over time, she understand where he was coming from. She wished she'd never dated him. She wished it had been Roger. But for some reason, she could never bring herself to confess her feelings to him. Things would have been so much easier that way. But she always stopped herself -besides, it wasn't like he'd ever love her back. He was Roger Taylor after all and she was just the best friend.
"I hated that wanker from the moment I laid eyes on him," Roger stated firmly, gently putting his arm around Y/N, "you should have never dated him. That was a huge mistake."
“You are actually Satan, oh my god," she looked at him with misty eyes and a heartbroken expression on her face. He was right, but the words still stung a little, "why would you even say that? You just wanted my relationship to be doomed from the start? You’re supposed to support your best friend.”
“I do...just not when you’re clearly making mistakes-”
“Oh, so everything I’ve done has been a mistake!? Gee, thanks,” she sighed, pulling out his grasp. Why couldn’t it just have been him from the start? Why, oh why not him?
"I-I didn't mean it like that," he sighed and pinched the bridge of his nose. She scooted out from under his arm and crossed her arms over her chest, scowling, "I just meant that he wasn't good for you. You deserve the world. Not some idiot who's going to go out and cheat on you and treat you like he did. I'm glad he's gone and I think you did the right thing. I just wish it had been done sooner. I wish you’d have let me take care of you when you needed it...not been forced to deal with this.”
"Yeah...well. Me too," she admitted quietly, drying her eyes with the end of hoodie she was wearing. It was one of Roger's that she had stolen. He didn't mind, it looked a million times better on her than him anyway, "I don't know why but it still hurts, you know? Like I know he was awful, but a small part of me still feels upset. I must seem like a proper fool.”
"It’s not weird, I assure you. It's understandable, my love," he whispered, patting her leg gently. The fact that he had said my love wasn't lost on either of them. Y/N’s heart skipped a beat at his soft tone, "getting over any relationship can be hard. Even the shitty ones. There’s something about a heartbreak that can be hard.”
“Do you miss her?” she asked quietly as she pulled her knees up to her chin, resting her head there, watching him intently. His brows furrowed as he tried to think of who her was. Y/N was, of course, referring to his latest girlfriend, who had been the bane of her existence.
“Who? Stacey?” he asked as she nodded her head lightly. Stacey had only lasted for a few months. All of his girlfriends only lasted a few months. It was usually great at the beginning, but when he came to the conclusion that they would never be anything like Y/N, he was done with them. It was, he slowly realized, because he only wanted Y/N. Not a copy or someone like her - just her.
And unfortunately, just like with Y/N,  Stacey had cheated on Roger. It was easy to let her go after that. Y/N had never hated someone more than she had hated Stacey, “nah. It was never going to go anywhere with her anyway. I suppose she made it easy on me.”
“Oh?” her curiosity peaked, her heart thumping against her chest wildly as she wondered if there was even a remote possibility that he reciprocated her feelings, “I mean…you don’t have to tell me, it’s your private business.”
“You’re my best friend, Y/N. I tell you everything,” he nudged her leg as he moved to sit in the same position as her. Their bodies mirrored each other as they sat on opposite sides of the couch, staring at each other, “ but If you tell anybody, no one will find your remains.”
"What could be so serious? You’re such an over dramatic hysterical queen-”
“I am not!” he insisted. Ever since she had heard Freddie call him that, she loved repeating it to him. Teasing him was her favorite thing. Anything involving Roger was her favorite thing. Roger was her favorite thing.
“Are too,” she insisted, and he just rolled his eyes at her, “now tell me. Why not Stacey? Or anyone else so far? I suppose neither of us have had any luck, really.”
“She was…sort of like a fill in, I suppose. Most of the girls have been,” he shrugged as he looked away, concentrated his gaze on the television, “I never saw a future with any of them. Sometimes it just got lonely. It’s nice to have someone to hold...even when you know it isn’t real, sometimes you can pretend it is. I don’t know. It seems silly to even admit it but loud.”
“You’re allowed to be happy, y’know,“ she leaned forward, trying to recapture his gaze. She could tell him something was on his mind. Something he wasn’t saying, words caught on the tip of his tongue, "so am I. We both are. We deserve happiness and love. Maybe we should stop accepting the love we think we deserve and find the love that is meant for us.”
“What if…” he looked back at her expectant face. The words he had been dying to say were in the top of his tongue, but he just couldn’t get them out. What if he just made a fool out of himself?
“Rog? You can tell me anything bub,” she encouraged him, contemplating if she’d even like the words he would say or if her own heart would just break more. What is she just ended up even more heartbroken?
“What if I’ve already met the one I want to be with? The one that I love?” he voice was so low, she almost didn’t hear him. He bit his lip, mulling over what he had just said, “because I think I have...”
“Who?” Y/N felt her heart start dropping. It couldn’t be her. It would never be her. She was setting herself up for failure.
“She’s pretty amazing. Beautiful, funny, kind, smart. She loves to tease me. And I sure hope she doesn’t think I’m being a complete fool,” he choked back the lump in his throat, bringing his cerulean eyes to her. She just nodded, trying to keep from crying, whoever this girl was seemed amazing. He clearly had it bad or her, “I just don’t know if I should tell her, because I don’t know if she feels the same. And I can’t handle rejection from her, I don’t think.”
“Why?! Roger, if you think you love her you should tell her!” she stared at him, stunned, “you’re clearly smitten with her.”
“Because…we’re best friends and live together,” he said and she just nodded, not processing what he had said, “s-so I’m kind of laying it all on the line here, my love. I just need to know if you feel the same. Otherwise...oh boy, this would be awkward. I hope I haven’t spent this long dreaming of you for nothing.”
"Well, who is it?” she asked, wondering who it could be. His confession had gone completely for her head. She had been so caught up in her own denial that she missed the whole thing. Roger started laughing, his nerves dissipating slowly. She was such a sweet fool sometimes.
“Wow, I am so in love with you… just wow. I confess my love after all this time and you just miss it. My favorite, daft pretty girl,” he decided to spell it out, since she wasn’t getting it. This time, he had her attention. Her mouth dropped open as she stared at him, slowly processing the newfound information. Roger Meddows Taylor had just confessed his love to her. This had to be a dream, “love, Y/N, it’s you. It’s always been you. Since the first time you spilled your coffee on at that cafe when we met.”
“Me?” she asked quietly, feeling the familiar tingling in her eyes. This times they weren’t tears of sadness, they were tears of happiness, “me? Oh my stars. Roger, are you serious? Please don’t be lying to me, because my heart can’t take that.”
“I’m being dead serious,” he chuckled nervously, “I’m just hoping that you feel the same way. Otherwise I’m going to be feeling very dumb. I-I always thought you might feel the same, but I could never tell.”
“Roger…I wish I knew exactly what to say. There’s so many things I’ve been wanting to say for a long time. I just couldn’t bring myself to do it-”
“C’mon give me a chance! Please…I just. I feel like we’re going to regret it if we don’t try this. I think, no, I know we’re meant to be together,“ he was almost pleading with her at this point, not letting her get a word in edgewise. She giggled lightly at him, his face flustered as he ran a hand through his already messy hair, "I just want one chance. Give me a shot? Please just let me love you like I’ve been wanting to.”
“Rog-”
“Y/N, I know this a lot. But I don’t think it’s shocking. We’ve always had a sort of thing between us-”
“Roger Taylor! Stop your stammering your one moment and let me finish,” she moved forward on the couch, so she was leaning against his knees. She reached up and touched his cheek gently, “I love you. Not just as my best friend, or my roommate. I’m in love with you. It’s been you for a long time. I just never thought someone like you would ever like me.”
“But you’re amazing. The absolute best, how could it not have been you?” he whispered quietly, turning his head slightly, so nuzzled into her soft hand, “I’m in love with you too.”
“So, the conclusion we’ve just reached is that we’ve been fools this entire time?” she laughed, thinking of all the wasted time. All those nights when it was just the two of them, if only they had known back then what they knew now. All those times when she wondered if he was flirting, he had been. It was all very real this whole time. She sighed and closed her eyes, “think of all that lost time.”
“But we’ve got now,” he shifted, spreading his legs out as he pulled her onto his lap. She didn’t even bother to stop him. His hands on her waist were electric, his touch like fire. His voice was low and she could tell he was trying to keep his composure, “and the future. Forever.”
“Why is your voice so low?” she teased him, resting her forward against his, breathing in his familiar scent - her favorite scent. She knew that tone even though she had only heard it a handful of times over the tears. It was how he got when he was about to cry, “are you going to start crying on me now, my sweet boy?”
“No! It’s...because I’m Batman? Duh?“ he joked, laughing as he reached up to wipe a stray tear. The moment, in its beauty and simplicity, had thoroughly overwhelmed him. Parts of him never thought this moment would come, but he was over the moon that it finally did, “it’s just a stick in my eye, that’s all.”
"You’re such a little liar,” she said, putting her hands on his cheeks, as she studied his beautiful face. It was the face she was always most excited to see. It was the first face she thought of in the morning and the last one before she slipped away into sleep, “you’re my favorite softie. I know the real you, Roger. And I love every bit of you.”
“Tell me why we didn’t come to this conclusion sooner?” he sighed quietly. She just shrugged her shoulders, giving him a smile that stretched from ear to ear, “can I be honest?”
“Please do.”
“I’ve hated every single guy you’ve ever dated. Or just been interested in. I wish I could have beaten them all,” he admitted, and she threw her head back with laughter, “what?!”
“I’ve felt that about every girl that’s even laid eyes on you,” she concurred. It was true. Any girl that showed any remote interest in Roger had earned plenty of glares from her, “especially Stacey. She was positively nauseating!”
“Can I ask you something else?” he was sheepishly, but his grip on her waist tightened. She nodded leaned in closer to him, noses touching slightly, “can I kiss you? Finally?”
“You didn’t have to ask,” she said, only a few inches between them. He leaned in slowly and kissed her softly, and sweetly, but with a sense of urgency. It wasn’t much, but it was perfect. They fit together like puzzle pieces, like they were meant to be.
“You’re amazing,” he whispered, his breath tickling her face. He reached up and traced along her lips, “does that mean I get to do that anytime now?”
“Anytime,” she confirmed, “I’m yours, Roger. You’ve always had me, even if we didn’t realize it.”
He leaned forward, kissing her again with a renewed intensity as her arms went around his neck and pulled him close. They carried on, only pulling apart when they needed some air. Roger had managed to lay down on couch, Y/N now on top of him.
“Didn’t know you wanted to get into my pants that badly,” he smirked at her and she just laughed, laying completely down on top of him, pressing a kiss to his cheek.
“You’re so full of yourself,” she chided him, but the smile never left her face, “but yeah, I kinda do. For like the last ten years. So please excuse me if I’m a little antsy.”
“Ohhhh,” he kissed her again, letting his lips linger on hers. They were so soft, and he could easily get used to the feeling he decided, “ten years, huh? We’ve been waiting too long then, pretty girl.”
“So what are you gonna do about it?” she teased, as he toyed with the hem of her hoodie, his fingers ghosting over her bare flesh, “are you as good as they say? Or is it all some sort of lie?”
“I can show you,” he promised, a hungry look in his eyes and she just smirked, raising her eyebrows at him, “and trust me, it’s not just a rumor. You won’t regret any of this. Just that we waited so long. But there’s plenty of time to make up for all those lost moments.”
“Show me,” she commanded and he quickly got up, picking her up and heading in the direction of his bedroom, “show me you love me.”
“I’ll show you more than that, pretty girl,” he promised her, “I’ll make sure everyone knows that I love you.”
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storgaardlevine14-blog · 6 years ago
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At Glassdoor, Determine Just how much Folks Truly Create At Google, Microsoft, Yahoo, And also All over.
To support Petric's insanity plea, his lawyers invested Tuesday developing his computer game substance addiction, with his sibling indicating that he came to be addicting complying with being actually housebound as a result of a staph infection following a major snowboarding accident. I lately talked with Hawkins to obtain his take on why his strategy to artificial intelligence will eventually eclipse other techniques, featuring the white-hot industry of deep-seated understanding. There's not much to change on the settings of the app, although, unlike other applications, this one provides you the capability to change the chart supplier. After a time frame from 3 months from Salvestrol Supplements, PSA test outcomes had come back to within typical limits. From here you take a trip to sites around the globe including the Statuary of Freedom where you'll have the capacity to select from 3 mini video games (2 of which need to be actually purchased). The recurring engagement of psycho therapists offered, along with emotional know-how, ethical pay for the United States authorities's course of abuse. Along with these concepts in thoughts I had a clear place to start, a clear idea from what the completed concept should think that, and also managed to pinpoint as well as do away with concept ideas that failed to rather match our goal. The MIND diet plan takes pair of effective diet plans - the heart-healthy Mediterranean diet plan and the blood-pressure decreasing DASHBOARD diet plan - and also locate the foods items in each that particularly affect brain wellness. DeepMind has likewise promptly connected to a thorough description of the research study venture, as well as mentions that has provided its own research process for available colleague assessment-- and also will be sending any type of arise from this investigation to peer-reviewed diaries, as is normal, so others in the health care neighborhood can evaluate all of them". Or even much worse - record on its own could possibly become a body, consider the google effect as well as personal satisfying prophecies. A thousand ideas travel through your thoughts every hr, as well as you have 2 possibilities. Have injustice for instance, its typical that after a lot of battles your personalities need to have some rest, unless you provide them an inspiration (genuine money for additional realism - you believe the activity)!! Regardless of whether there sufficed qualified specialists to comply with requirement, a lot of areas wouldn't have the resources to maintain psychologists on workers at every college. And also my Personal Mind had an industry time, as Private Thoughts carry out. So I enjoyed my mind a little, simply in interest, to find if there was everything important there certainly. After that they are going to bring in a great deal from cash, if an individual can become the Dolby from the web-- eliminate the noise and give our team very clear audio--. Among the most effective features of the MIND diet plan is actually that this is actually easer to comply with compared to the majority of various other diet plans and you do not need to adhere to this wonderfully to acquire the benefits, which makes that most likely you'll observe that for a long time. Once a map is actually completed, that could be transported in several ways for usage away from the ipad tablet atmosphere. Dan Simons was actually a new faculty member at Harvard in the psychological science division and I was actually a graduate student. Right now, if at the start from the job we had thought through the posture demands, our company would certainly possess recognized that with the small airplane our company were actually using, there is actually only no chance our company could possibly do it. http://colorfulandhealthy.info/ will blast you around much more in comparison to the preciseness had to fly the plane in buildup. Working recollection is actually the potential to support relevant information in your mind and then operate this as well as quote it in a different order, which is actually very, quite hard. Every possible bubble, however, gives an astonishingly valuable framework for strengthening and debating the role of individual psychological science in monetary markets. FreeMind additionally supplies preparatory assistance for PNG, JPEG, and GIF graphics in your mind charts. May must create a full follow-up blog post on this, because I have actually been actually focusing on an Archetype (Personal) Branding System for a handful of months now. The fact that our settings may therefore effortlessly guide how we describe our personals states one thing very exceptional about how much our conditions affect our personal self-views-- and also probably exactly how our team are going to act around and also present our own selves to others. A few cautions: Do not hang around very long, or you might come across as spacey and also concerned-- other factors from body movement and non-verbal communication ought to be kept in mind also. If I check out a spreadsheet or some significant data source, that possesses construct to this. We may be able to apply our protocols, our robot algorithms, to essentially probe about in records to find out the design in static data similarly an individual maker finding out pro carries out. This is this second technique that has actually made Shutoff a forerunner in the business from refining and also boosting the playtesting method. This may be true, as a number of the comments condition, that the area entices a particular type of asking and open thoughts that tends to take advantage of liberal worths, and also conservative self-select out of the area. They aren't visiting return as well as assess a thousand crappy apps so as to quickly end up being a curated establishment.
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theeurekaproject · 4 years ago
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Regiis Martyris
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She’d been everywhere from Mars to uptown Appalachia, but she kept coming back here to this war-torn wasteland.
Out of all the red light districts in all of Eleutheria, of course the Terminal was right next to Lyra’s birthplace, the place she’d spent most of her childhood being beaten up and left for dead and getting right back up again to do it all the next morning. Of course it was right by the seedy clubs she used to work at and the shady hotels with private rooms in the back for God-knows-what. Of course it was but half a mile away from the place she’d left just a few days ago, where Ace and T had noticed a bleeding girl on the ground and changed Lyra’s life forever. And, of course, it was just a few thousand levels below where T himself had met his end.
If someone had told Lyra that just a few hundred miles above her were glittering palaces and Imperial princesses and all the ladies of the court, she never would have believed them. Logically, she knew that her Appalachia and their Appalachia were one and the same, but it seemed insane that they shared the same soil. The opulent life of luxury that she’d always witnessed on the holoscreens seemed too far removed from this downtown hell for them to even be in the same dimension.
Yet here it was, and here she was, with the Imperatrix, of all people. An Imperatrix dressed in black, looking like the illegitimate child of a low-class soldier boy and an escort, nothing at all like she was on holographs and propaganda but still unmistakably the same person. There was something about royalty, something in the blood, that made them different somehow.
Acidalia walked daintily and limped almost prettily on her ankle, which had begun to bleed so profusely it was soaking through her shoes and leaving sticky red-brown droplets on the black floors. She still walked like she was in high heels, still seemed seven feet tall even though she was probably not more than an inch taller than Lyra. It still felt like Acidalia was looking down on her—not in a rude way, but in a way that showed their class differences so obviously Lyra was surprised no one had caught onto it before.
It was absurd, that Imperatrix Acidalia Cipher should be more accepting of a Cantator than a Labora was. A Labora girl who’d barely had the time to know anything about the world, no less—but prejudices ran deep, deep underground where hundreds of workers had nothing better to do than gossip and blame other people for their problems. Then again, it wasn’t the fault of the Laborum that they were imprisoned in lower Appalachia—it just wasn’t the fault of their scapegoat either.
Lyra’d been insulted a hundred million times and physically assaulted countless more, so none of this should have been new to her, but that little girl felt different, all the same.
She walked as fast as she could, one tiny black-shoed foot in front of the other, half-jogging but not really running. Acidalia was fitter and faster, probably had more calories in one day than Lyra would be lucky to have in a week, and it showed. The Imperatrix could run when Lyra stumbled, could lift things Lyra fell over. She was nowhere near as strong as the average soldier, but she was considerably better at anything physical than a Cantator.
Lyra’s side hurt. It did that, sometimes, when she had to run. She didn’t have a name for it, but the sensation was as familiar to her as these black-tiled floors and broken fluorescent bulbs.
“Are you all right?” Acidalia asked, barely even breathless.
“I’m fine,” Lyra wheezed. “Your foot is still bleeding." She cringed. “I’m very aware of that. I’ll be okay. You look pale-“
“It’s these crappy lights.”
It was hard to see under the visor, but Acidalia quirked an eyebrow like she was concerned. “Don’t overexert yourself. Please.”
“You’re the one leaving blood all over these hallways.” They’d temporarily slowed, and Lyra was beginning to catch her breath again. She’d never say it, but she was grateful for the break.
“We’ll just have to hope they don’t DNA-test any random blood they find,” Acidalia sighed. “Not that that’s a real concern, of course, but I’d just like to minimize risks. I don’t want anyone to know I was ever here until after I leave.”
“Until after you leave?” Lyra asked. “How about not ever?!”
“We’ll have to let them know I’m not dead at some point,” she said. “If we get to the Terminal and my plan succeeds, then we come out on top in a blaze of glory and make the entire Nova look foolish. And if it fails, and if I die, it hardly matters. They’re already mourning me anyway. It won’t be any more of a morale hit because no one needs to know it was a failed operation—they already think Alestra killed me, and Andromeda will tell them that narrative.”
“Aren’t you worried?” Lyra asked. “I mean, do you think there’s a real possibility you’ll die before they get to know you’re alive again?”
She shrugged. “There are a hundred million things that could happen. I’m merely preparing for one of the possibilities.” She talked about her own mortality the same way one would talk about the weather, as if her death was as inconsequential as a cloudy day.
“Doesn’t that feel weird?”
“When you’re constantly under the threat of assassination, you get used to it,” Acidalia shrugged. “It’s a different battleground down here, but it’s the same political games, the same people who want me dead. In any case, I might be better off as a martyr.”
“What does that mean?”
Acidalia didn’t answer her, but her silence said more than words ever could have.
***
The tunnels got darker as they went deeper underground. Children became teenagers and teenagers became young adults, but the work never changed. Young women in black sometimes stopped and stared at Acidalia and Lyra for a moment before turning back to their jobs, whispering among themselves; it never lasted very long. They walked on in silence, Acidalia an elegant imitation soldier and Lyra a scavenger with a helmet on. No one questioned them. There were no clocks down here, and no sunlight, making it hard to tell how much time had passed. They did it on purpose, so they could pay eight hours’s wages for ten hours’ work.
“How much longer?” Lyra eventually asked, torn between not wanting to sound childish and really needing to sit down.
“Andy,” Acidalia asked over her headset, “where are we?”
“Let me check.” Andromeda’s voice sounded In Lyra’s headphones, gravelly. Lyra couldn’t tell if it was the distance between them, the fact that the city was half rubble, or just how her voice was that made it sound so strange on a headset.
“You’re right beneath the Square,” Andromeda said.
“What square?” Acidalia asked.
“I don’t know, the Square. Lyra knows what I’m talking about.”
Lyra nodded. “The Square’s the most crowded place in all Appalachia. It’s kind of like a marketplace, if you know what I mean—well, you’ve probably never been to a marketplace. Anyway, it’s a busy, seedy place. I’ve only ever been there once.”
“If it’s so busy,” Acidalia asked, “why is there nobody underneath here? There are entrances and exits all along the tunnels-“
“They’re all dead,” Andromeda said, matter-of-factly.
“What? How?” Lyra asked, unwilling to believe such a large gathering of people had been obliterated. “They can’t just-“
“I don’t know how, but I’m looking down with infrared and there are a load of people lying down and not moving. I haven’t been to the Underground in years, but something tells me that people don’t just go to sleep in the Square.”
“They… don’t.” Lyra didn’t know what to say. She hadn’t been to the Square in years—probably almost fifteen of them—but from what little she remembered, there were hundreds of thousands of people, most of them teenage girls like herself. It was crowded and lit by broken television screens, the kind that had been recovered and restored only to be forgotten about and left to rot in the deepest slums, and the atmosphere was like no other. That many human beings couldn’t just be gone.
“So what you’re saying is that we’re underneath some kind of massacre,” Acidalia said matter-of-factly, apparently unaffected by everything.
“The bodies are still warm according to my laser sights. Have you heard anything like a bomb?”
“There’s been some blasts,” she replied, “but these tunnels aren’t shaking. I doubt it was an explosive.”
“Probably that nerve agent again,” Andromeda said. “I wouldn’t go up there. It’s not going to be pretty.”
“There’s an entrance to the terminal a few blocks north of here,” Acidalia said. “How is it there?”
“Pretty bad,” Andromeda said.
“How bad?”
“Do you even care about the answer to that question?” she asked.
“Truthfully? No,” Acidalia replied, acting like she was talking about holovids or gladiator fights, something small and meaningless, and not the lives of herself and Lyra. “But if it’s a high guarantee of failure, then I’ll find another route.”
“Depends on how dirty you’re willing to get your hands.”
“I have still have Cassiopeia’s blood on my hands, what’s a little more?”
Lyra’s eyes widened. “You killed someone?”
“The woman who shot my brother. I smashed her skull in with her own gun.”
“Oh.” Violence, settling debts with blood, was nothing new to Lyra. Still, hearing something so horrible described by Acidalia Cipher was odd. The way she said it was almost scary. She said it in the same proper, elegant, heavily accented tone she said everything, the same voice she made speeches in, debated politics in, and it sounded incredibly alien.
"I don't think she's dead, though," Acidalia added, like that made it any better.
"Why?" Lyra asked. "I mean, skull injuries like that aren't survivable-"
"Aren't survivable down here," Acidalia corrected. "Cassiopeia was a caste Generalis, Lyra. She's extremely wealthy and very, very privileged, and she's close to my mother, who apparently sees her as enough of an asset to send her to kill me. Her mother was a cyborg, and I'm willing to bet she is as well now."
"I never see Cassiopeia's mother mentioned anywhere," Lyra remarked. "I didn't realize she was that important.” "Her mother was Anatolia Nayla Generalis. She died quite a long time ago; she was friends with my grandmother and my aunt before they passed. She was notorious for her vanity and made a lot of bad decisions—which, honestly, explains why she and my grandmother were so close. Anatolia completely destroyed her brain by trying to edit her own genetic code. She messed up and something went wrong, and she was a vegetable for practically the entire time I've known her, which wasn't very long. I was only about six or seven when she died, but I always remembered her as creepy. She could barely say her own name."
"So she died when I was a toddler, then,” Lyra said. “That explains why I never knew of her."
"That, and my mother tried to cover it up as much as possible. They didn't like each other, never did. Completely opposite policies, opposite cliques... you know what I mean. And Anatolia was friends with my aunt, who my mother didn't like, either." "I didn't even know you had an aunt," Lyra said, slightly taken aback at the fact that there was apparently this much excess royalty.
"Two, actually. Both are dead now."
"How?" Lyra asked, without quite realizing that she was asking it. "I mean, you don't have to tell me. If you don't want to talk-"
"I like talking. It's distracting, but that's a good thing," Acidalia said. "Their names were Avina and Celestia. Avina was older and Celestia was younger than my mother, and both died several years before I was born, so it's not like I ever had any real connection to them outside of the stories people told. Apparently Avina murdered Celestia in a fit of jealousy because she had a cult following, but there's not a soul alive who believes that."
"Why not?"
"From all accounts, Avina was like my grandmother—kindhearted, foolish, not smart or cruel enough to plan a murder. And Celestia was only seven years old."
"What do you believe?” Lyra didn’t know seven-year-old princesses died. Of course, logically, the corruption in the royal court had to have repercussions, but it seemed strange, still, that children of the upper class could just disappear like that.
"Seeing as the middle sister—my mother—was the only survivor," Acidalia said, "and conveniently enough, got to take the throne after Avina was executed for a crime she probably didn't commit, I personally think my mother was behind it. Of course, she would have been around your age at the time—fifteen, maybe sixteen—but I still wouldn't put it past her."
"She's really that cruel," Lyra said, more as an observation than a question.
"Alestra was never a saint. You've seen the effects of her policies on a civilization, I've seen the effects of her personality on a child... she is not, and never has been, a good person."
"I can't imagine she was the warmest mom," Lyra remarked.
Acidala smiled sadly under the black mask. "Once I fell over in court in my first time wearing high heels. I was maybe nine or ten years old? She decided the best solution was to make me take pointe lessons—a type of ballet where you dance on your toes. She said walking would be easy in comparison to pointe.... I had no idea how to dance, hadn't taken ballet in years. I gave myself so many fractures that half the bones in my feet have been replaced with metal. My bones were fragile to begin with; my father was Martian, and my ancestors weren’t accustomed to Earth’s gravity—they settled Mars long before artificial gravity existed. But Alestra made me take pointe for five solid years, until I started actually having to prepare for a leadership  and I simply didn't have time. When I turned fifteen, I set all of my ballet things on fire."
"I used to do ballet!" Lyra said, surprised. "Never like that, though, not the classy kind. The crappy shoes, dancing ‘sexily’ on tables at a bar for more tips, way-too-much makeup kind. It’s probably not real ballet, but that’s what they called it, and I did it because I was always short on money.”
“Ballet or not, it sounds less painful."
"Well, I never broke my feet, so... probably not," Lyra agreed. "I never wore fancy shoes for it. Those are ridiculously expensive and they last for only a few weeks at best."
Acidalia laughed. "I used to save all of my old shoes. I'd go through several pairs a week, sometimes two in one day, before they'd be so worn-down they wouldn't work anymore. Setting that pile alight was cathartic, though I can't say my feet are in much better condition now..." She looked down at her bloody shoes. "But I did learn to walk in court. I learned ballet as best as I could, I learned pain tolerance, I learned how to sew ribbons into the right places on shoes, I learned when it's best to shut up and keep quiet and do what you're told to avoid worse things later. My mother wasn't the nicest woman, but she taught me many things, even if it wasn't her intention."
"I wish I could say the same about mine," Lyra said. "The best thing my mother ever taught me was not to abandon my future kids. Or curse my children with this awful hair color."
Acidalia laughed, then winced. "Pink isn't the worst she could have gone with. My sister modded her hair so it's fluorescent red. It was an accident, she wanted it to just have red tips, and she was so mad at me when I wouldn't fix it for her.”
“Why wouldn’t you?” Lyra asked.
Acidalia sighed, like she was regretting it. “Actually, I don’t know.”
The conversation tapered off then, and they didn’t speak again for a long time.
***
It was harder to climb upwards than downwards, half because of the actual, physical exertion and half because Lyra knew what was coming. She could smell death from a mile underground and there were corpses by the ladders. Some had clearly fallen, and their bodies were protruding masses of bones and flesh, limbs twisted in unnatural ways and hair splayed out around cheap broken helmets. Others had made it down and then collapsed, bleeding from their eyes and leaving puddles of blood around their heads and scratch marks where they were crawling. It was no more gruesome than many of the dead gang members or mutilated young women Lyra had seen before, but something about seeing a pile of bodies was difficult.
One man, a teenage boy with chains around his wrists, gasped for air in the smoggy hallways. Blood seeped from his mouth. He reached a hand up as if to ask for help, then collapsed again.
This was no soldier. This was an escaped slave. Slavery wasn’t legal, but neither were dictatorial monarchies, and there was no use in pretending that laws meant anything down here.
If T hadn’t seen a scared girl and decided to help her, if Ace cared a little less, Lyra could have been that boy.
She tried not to think about it too much.
Acidalia seemed barely bothered, just as elegant as ever, as she stepped over cooling corpses like they were merely obstacles on their path. She scaled the ladder with twelve missing rungs on the bottom, jumping and pulling herself up with her arms as if she weighed nothing. Lyra wondered if it was genetic modification, strength-enhancing drugs, or a combination of both. Probably both.
“Hurry,” Acidalia said.
“I’m trying. I’m not as strong as you are, or as tall! Just let me—shit.” Not for the first time, Lyra fell backwards. “That’s not what I meant to say.” Andromeda chortled in her earpiece while Acidalia sighed and offered Lyra a hand. With considerable effort, she managed to grasp the ladder.
The world above was hot, much hotter than it normally was—and Eleutheria was always hot, because of some scientific reason Lyra didn’t really understand. It rarely dipped below seventy, and she assumed it must be even warmer where the sunlight hit. But now it was easily over ninety degrees, and the bodies had begun to rot in the heat.
“This smells atrocious,” Acidalia said. “Ugh.”
“Bodies don’t usually smell pretty,” Andromeda replied. “You’re such a princess.”
“I don’t think ‘not liking rotting corpses’ is a ‘princess’ thing. That’s more of a ‘normal and well-adjusted person’ thing.”
“When have you ever been a normal person?” Andromeda asked. “you aren’t—wait, hold on a second.” “What?” Lyra asked. “What do you mean?”
“Go left,” Andromeda snapped. “Hurry up and move. There’s a group of soldiers right behind you and they are not ours.”
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mestizo-efp · 8 years ago
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Ten Minutes omegaverse
OMG I’ve finally made it! It was never ending…please note that this is the first time that I’ve translated one of my fiction soooo…..please don’t kill me. I know it will be full of mistakes but I did my best. Let me know your thoughts
19 Days,Omegaverse AU
Chapter 1
He Tian x Mo GuanShan
NSFW
Summary: “He stripped off as quickly as possible and threw himself under the hot water of the shower. The awareness of using He Tian’s shower caused him an annoying feeling at his stomach as if he was sharing something intimate and private. He tried to move as little as possible, avoiding to move his feet so he wouldn’t touch too many tiles. He didn’t want to leave too many traces”
“According to recent studies at Tsinghua University, the number of Omega-class subjects is considerably decreased. The estimates point to a 50% decrease from 2010 to today and it seems that the rates are set to rise. The causes are to be credited to increased consumption of suppressants by the Omegas parties and their increasingly effective and lasting effect. This does not exclude a possible extinction of the Omega-class in the next twenty / thirty years. To date, the number of Alpha and Beta make up for the most 95% of the world population ”
«Tch,» said Guanshan clicking his tongue, tossing the magazine in the trash «Bullshits».
Sometimes he wondered why they would throw away so much money in these sensational “studies”, if in the end they always get half of it, pulling out of mere conjectures or percentages. A practical example? Both of his parents were Beta, they didn’t use suppressants, yet he was somehow born as an Omega. How was it possible?
It was his curse.
There was a knock at his door, which was locked.
«GuanShan?» it was his mother «How do you feel? Do you want something to eat?»
«No Mom, I’m fine»
There was a brief moment of silence «All right».
GuanShan listened to her footsteps receding into the kitchen before making a big sigh.
Had he always been so good at lying to his mother? The truth was that he was feeling pretty darn bad.
He has told his mother that he had a bad stomach disorder, the truth was that he was in heat, that disgusting heat.
It made him feel uncomfortable and being his first year it came in an irregular manner and with unclear effects. Sometimes he felt a fire in his veins, sometimes he felt the need to jump into a tub of hot water. Sometimes he could eat a whole cow, sometimes just the thought of swallowing a single grape made him want to vomit blood.
He had told anyone, not even to his mother. At school, everyone thought that he was a common Beta, and thankfully his first heat came during the night, while he was still in bed. He knew suppressants, and if he had told his mother she would surely rush to buy them, but the problem was just that: their damn price. With the excuse that Omegas were increasingly rare and medicines increasingly sophisticated and powerful, their price had skyrocketed. The financial situation of his family was not good, damn, at most he could afford a single pill, which would still be a waste because it would not be useful at all. So, last year, every time the heat appeared, GuanShan locked himself in his room for five long days, making up a different excuse each time.
For safety, he always closed the window so that the smell does not peep out attracting whomever. He had not understood what could be the reaction of an Alpha to an Omega during its heat. All that things about pheromones were confusing, but it frightened him anyway, even if he would rather die before admitting it to himself. He didn’t care, and he preferred not to go out and test it for himself, that was certain. He saved money and took a few days off away from school and from He Tian, that asshole.
“Disgusting!Disgusting!Disgusting!”
His feelings were at odds even with themselves. On one hand the excitement provoked by the heat, and on the other hand, the disgust and hatred for all that concerned it. It was as if the two sides were fighting each other for dominance, but something was preventing the victory of one or the other. As if something was missing.
He despaired thinking of having to live the rest of his life that way … he had to earn more money and get a lifetime supply of suppressants.
Suddenly the phone rang. GuanShan snorted, cursing himself for forgetting to turn it off. He took it and read the name on the display: Gao Peng. A classmate, it was strange that he was calling.
“That’s strange …” he answered the call «Hello?»
«GuanShan? What happened to you? It’s been a while».
«I…had things to do»
There was a brief silence «Look, something bad has happened»
«Something bad?»
«Yes, this afternoon Ma Qiang has clashed with some guys from another school and tomorrow they want to settle things, we need your help»
“Damn it”
«I … I don’t think I’ll be there»
«What? Are you kidding me? Do you understand or not what happened?»
«I get it! I’m telling you that I have some fucking problems and I don’t know if I can be there»
«You’re still the same! When there is a need you disappear! Ma Qiang is in trouble and he needs us! Are you scared or something?».
GuanShan tightens his fist so hard that it hurts him. He narrowed his eyes, biting his lip.
«A-Alright … I understand we’ll meet tomorrow at the usual spot»
«Finally! See you tomorrow».
It took several minutes before GuanShan fully realized what had just happened.
«Fuck!!» he shouted, pulling a strong punch to the mattress.
He stood up, making back and forth across the room. What had he done? Had he just agreed to come out of the house in full heat with no suppressants? How stupid!
He crouched on the ground running his hands through his hair. He could not go back, call and say that he could not go. They would have called him a coward and, damn it, no one was ever allowed to call him that way in the face without going back home with a few teeth less.
“Okay, okay,” he thought, “Think, there must be a solution, any solution”
He thought for a long time, considering all possibilities, but every possible plan went to hell whenever, in his head, he put one foot outside the house. He lived in a damn city, with thousands and thousands of people. God only knew how many Alfas could be around. Although … maybe in his district, not so many.
An idea flashed in his head, it was pretty good, but not without its risks … and certainly a big loss. He gets up, approaching his desk and opening the second drawer, there appeared a double bottom that kept inside a case. GuanShan grabbed it, sighing. They were his only personal savings. He had promised himself that he would use it only in case of absolute necessity, perhaps for his mother or to pay off some debt.
It wasn’t much, a few savings accumulated over three years with sporadic jobs.
The temptation to put it back in its place was strong, very strong … but what else could he do? He was not a coward, damn it!
He sat on the bed, clutching the case for a few minutes.
“Okay, I can do this. I will recover in some way, even if it means doing something for that bastard ”.
He took the phone and began to formulate the phases of his plan. In his district, there was a pharmacy open 24h-24h, which was a blessing in his case. He had to go around two, three in the morning, to encounter fewer people as possible. Following the back streets, there was a chance he met anyone. The possibility of finding an Alphas’s salesman or saleswoman was slim to none. They usually were quite wealthy people, unlike him. He would buy the most disgusting and cheaper brand of suppressants and then he would return home.
He nodded satisfied, feeling a sense of relief: he had never taken suppressants and the idea of finally being able to get rid of that discomfort heartened him a little.
He spent the rest of the afternoon and evening studying the best route and the places to avoid. There was a nightclub, on the way, that usually stayed open all night and it was quite busy, but it was quite far away from the pharmacy.
At two in the morning, GuanShan went into the bathroom, making one of the longest and cold showers throughout his life. He rubbed his skin up to scratch, eliminating any trace of smell. For security he splashed a lot of deodorant and perfume; although it was summer, he covered his mouth with a scarf, but not before having brushed his teeth three times. He looked like a thief, but who cares. He thanked the fact that his mother was a heavy sleeper, and furtively he left the house as quickly as possible. He followed his ideal path to perfection, checking at every turn that the way was clear. The plan seemed to have a great success and GuanShan, happy and victorious,
managed to reach the pharmacy without meeting anyone. He does not even remember the last time he had felt so satisfied with himself. He was so happy he ignored the embarrassment of having to grab the box of pills and the curious gaze of the saleswoman. Omegas were rare. He went out and stood for a moment in front of the automatic doors, pulling out the suppressants' box from the small plastic bag. All of a sudden GuanShan lost all his enthusiasm. 148 Yuan for that miserable light blue box. There were only a dozen pills inside… and they were the less expensive ones.
“And so they go my savings…oh well”
Sighing, he put them in his pocket, he began to get very hot and it was better to go back home. He looked up and…
«Ah!» said someone, right in front of him.
“It can’t be” thought GuanShan, incredulous and bewildered: He Tian. He just came out of the 7 Eleven which was located in front of the pharmacy and he was holding a bag full of snacks and pre-cooked meals.
How the hell had he forget about He Tian?!? He lived in the area, and that was one of the shops that he frequented more often!!! He had completely forgotten.
He Tian seemed quite surprised to see him and after the first moment of surprise he tilted his head to one side and grinned, pointing him «You’re still alive, where have you been?».
GuanShan backed away, his heart began to beat fast-paced, so strong that he felt the veins of his neck throbbing. He was terrified, to say the least, a thousand and one questions began frantic buzzing in his head.
Did He Tian saw him with the suppressants in his hands? Did he put them away fast enough? There was someone else with him? Was he sweating? And if he were somehow sending some kind of scent without realizing it? No, that didn’t matter unless He Tian was …
“Oh, shit” he suddenly realized “He Tian … an Alpha?”
Wasn’t it obvious? Rich, arrogant, swaggering, with thousand of girls always around him, taller at least three spans more than a common Chinese… and strong, terribly strong. So strong that he was able to knock him down with just one hit of his knee.
He stepped back again, and to confirm his doubts something strange pinched his nose … it wasn’t a smell … more like an annoying itching of the nasal septum. For a moment he felt like an electrical discharge that reached his brain.
«Hey…» said He Tian, drawing his attention «… is that a scarf? You did realize it’s summer, right?»
Guanshan widened his eyes if he got too close it would be the end. A deep and powerful cry rang through his whole being:
“RUN!”
He doesn’t need to be told twice. Gritting his teeth and eating the asphalt with the shoes, he ran as fast as the wind and almost imagined the confused expression that could have He Tian at that time. But who cared, damn it? He just had to run. Go home, close himself inside his room and take those damn pills. As quickly as possible, he stopped only when he was almost crashing to the ground stumbling into a flower bed. He crouched down, catching his breath, and then pull himself up and, looking at the sky, taking a deep breath. NOW he was soaked with sweat. He wiped his chin, looking around.
“Huh?” he thought “Wait a minute”
He turned a few times, recognizing the road but making a terrible discovery: he had taken the wrong direction. It was on the opposite side to where there he should have been.
He pulled his hair, exasperated. He knew he was unlucky, but this was ridiculous. “Who is that bastard who sent me a curse?!? I’ll kill him! I swear I’ll kill him!”
Well, he could not waste time. He turned and froze. A group of people was coming right at him, they looked as if they have just come out of a nightclub and even though he was a few steps away GuanShan distinctly felt the stench of smoke and alcohol.
He could not move, he stood there like a statue until they passed him. And just when in his mind he was going to breathe a sigh of relief …
«Hey …» someone said «What’s this smell?»
For the first time in his entire life, GuanShan’s blood seemed to freeze in all his body. Pure, simple, fear.
He turned. A man in the group (taller than the others) was looking around him. His eyes and those of GuanShan met for a split second, but that was enough for the man. GuanShan thought he saw a spark ignite in the stranger’s eyes, and an electrical discharge went through him from the tip of the hair to shoes. No one else in the group seemed to sense something, but he still followed the gaze of what he was now certain was an Alfa. GuanShan saw him open his eyes wide, surprised, and then smile in one of the evilest and wicked smile he had ever seen. He had no hope of fighting, not in those circumstances. They were a group of six men, all certainly older than him and in his state, he would not hold the effort. Once again the only solution that was he able to follow was to escape. He had hopes of succeeding? He found no answer because his legs had begun to move even before he knew it.
«Get him!» he heard shouting behind him
«What? Why?»
«I’ll explain later! Don’t let him getaway!»
Even without looking GuanShan distinctly heard the footsteps behind him, following him numerous and unrelenting.
“Why? Why? Why!?!?! ” He thought, angry- no, furious with the whole world. The hell! He didn’t have a choice, no one had asked him to be born that way! To hell with his parents, that asshole of his father and the fucking money that were never enough. It wasn’t his fault, he did nothing.
His lungs began to burn with fatigue, as well as the legs and arms. But the footsteps behind him were still there, they didn’t stop.
Something tugged at his sleeve and he fell to the ground tumbling, banging his nose and his cheek. Heedless of the pain he pulled up as quickly as possible, pulling punches and kicks to anyone who came within range. He was able to hit a couple of men, but the other four swooped on him, hitting him first in the face and then in the stomach.
He gasped, spitting blood.
They slammed him against a wall, surrounding him. He had to blink at least ten times before he was able to distinguish their faces.
«Let me go you bastards» he managed to hiss
«Who is he?» asked one of them to the Alpha «He owes you money?»
The man didn’t answer but instead approached dangerously close to GuanShan, inhaling a deep breath of air at one centimeter from his nose. The boy felt such disgust that could barely suppress a gag. The tingling in his nose was different from before, it was strong but so annoying it was giving him a headache. Its smell was rotten and sour, like rotten meat.
«I knew it,» said the Alpha, making one step back and grinning malignantly «An Omega»
The other members of the group were surprised to hear those words, widening their eyes and looking at the Alpha.
«An Omega?» they said
«I can’t believe it»
«I thought they were gone … Where does he come from?»
The man licked his lips, hungry and GuanShan found no escape in the wall behind him. The Alpha seemed deaf and blind to the world around him, he followed GuanShan’s movements as a starving beast, imposing his gaze on that of the boy. He expected a small movement, just a spasm of a muscle, and he would jump on him.
«Don’t touch me» GuanShan hissed, with a narrow view in front of him, where the figure of that animal stood threateningly. «Fuck, stay away, I’ll kill you … I’ll kill you».
He repeated all the insults that came to his mind, spinning like a broken disk. He could not do anything else.
He wanted to shout, punch him and make him eat the asphalt with his teeth, but he couldn’t. A strange instinct rooted in him forced him to submit, to not run away. But that wasn’t what his head wanted, he wouldn’t give up, for nothing in the world, at the cost of dying.
Fighting against his own will, GuanShan bent his knees, fisting with all his strength. But it was useless, the man seemed to have had a terrible burst of adrenaline and, grabbing GuanShan’s wrist, he advanced in his direction, pushing him strongly against the wall and leaning on the boy with all his weight.
«FUCK!!! LET GO! LET GO! LET GO!!»
Grabbing him by the forehead, the Alpha pushed GuanShan’s head with incredible force against the wall behind him. The boy felt a sense of total loss, and his view blurred until it disappeared into a white mist. The world roared frightfully for a long time, until one hand first touched his hip, then his neck.
He also heard a voice, blowing into his left ear.
«I always wanted to try an Omega … it’s a shame that he’s a fucking brat and not a pretty girl but … I’ll settle for it»
“No,” GuanShan thought “Not to me… not to me”
At that moment he somehow remembered reading somewhere that a person could commit suicide by biting its tongue. Hemorrhage is such that you can almost drown in your blood.
He was already pressing his teeth in the soft flesh of his tongue when for some reason the Alpha seemed to stop.
«What’s happening ?!» shouted the man.
Then the pain in his head still prevented GuanShan from seeing clearly what was happening, he could only hear footsteps and noises. The man’s grip disappeared from his wrists and he slipped to the ground, unable to stand.
«Who the fuck are you?!» said someone.
The Alpha burst into an animal cry, screaming ferociously. GuanShan looked up and managed to distinguish two figures, one of whom recognized as the aggressor, thanks to the white shirt he wore. The other was just a blend of blurred colors. GuanShan shook his head, shaking his eyes with strength and resting his forehead on the cold asphalt beneath him.
The fight went on for a long while until there was a tremendous hustle created by the fall of a garbage bucket. Then, silence.
GuanShan rolled his back to the wall and raised his arms to his face.
He wanted to escape, but he couldn’t, he could only hope to protect himself. He heard the footsteps, which were closer, closer and closer. He clenched his teeth, forcefully and almost believed that he would explode, when a voice woke him up.
«Hey»
As if touched by a hot iron, GuanShan frowned incredulously, wide opening his eyes and mouth: He Tian. He was right in front of him, kneeling to the ground, at his height. He looked at him seriously and sweaty.
“What is this?” GuanShan thought, relieved to have recovered his sight. Around them, the aggressors were lying on the ground, and farther the Alpha with his head inside a garbage bucket tilted to one side.
“What is this?” GuanShan thought, relieved to have recovered his sight. Around them, the aggressors were lying on the ground, and farther the Alpha with his head inside a garbage bucket tilted to one side.
It took him a few moments to fully realize what had just happened and what had been avoided thanks to He Tian’s intervention. Just the idea made him nauseate.
«What» GuanShan’s throat was damn dry, talking to him was hurting «You, here … why?»
He Tian shrugged, indifferent «You ran away that way, it wasn’t polite from you»
Should he answer? What was he supposed to say? He didn’t know, GuanShan didn’t understand anything. He looked down at his hands: they were dirty and… they were trembling. He held them tight, closing his eyes.
“It’s over… it’s over”.
He opened his eyes and saw He Tian staring at him, then he remembered. It wasn’t over yet, even He Tian, he was an Alpha too.
Trembling he stood up, barely resting on his legs.
«Home» he whispered, «I need to go home»
«I’ll go with you,» said He Tian, standing up and leaning a hand on his shoulder.
That touch, mild and strangely delicate, burned like a fire on the boy’s skin, which snapped at the side by hitting his arm and turning away with a terrified look.
«NO!» he shouted, but seeing He Tian’s gaze, he tried to keep himself together «No, I’m…I’m fine»
Stumbling over, GuanShan managed to reach the main road toward his home. He Tian, however, followed him at a distance, his hands sunk into his pockets.
«Stop following me,» said GuanShan, but He Tian didn’t listen to him «Stop it!» he shouted, turning towards him.
«I just want to make sure you get there in one piece»
Deep rage came from GuanShan’s depths, which against all common sense fluttered on He Tian, gripping him by the collar of the shirt.
«You’re happy aren’t you? To find out all this! Another reason to look down on me, to feel superior and treat me like scum! I don’t need anyone, you hear me? DON’T DO IT!!! Don’t look at me with pity, that’s what I hate the most … It makes me wanna… puk …»
He felt a sense of nausea so strong and deep that for a second his head swirled like he was riding the tallest roller coaster in the world. He had to get on the nearest bush and use it to reject all dinner and probably that morning’s breakfast. And then the rest of the bile, burning like fire. And the humiliation of being attacked and hunted like an animal, and the fear of what might have happened.
He tried to breathe again, but at the first breath of oxygen, he was forced to sink into himself.
He breathed through his nose, forcefully, forcing himself not to die choking. He was dirty with mud, sweat, and now that crap he had thrown up, what would his mother think? He passed the back of his hand to his lips, noticing He Tian behind him, still where he had left him.
«Come to my house, so you can clean yourself up» he snapped out of nowhere
«Fuck you!!» answered GuanShan, without many compliments.
He Tian approached quickly, keeping a distance that wouldn’t put GuanShan uneasy. They looked into each other's eyes, intensely, and GuanShan’s legs seemed to turn into melted butter as well as the rest of his body.
«Come» he ordered, baritone «l won’t do anything, I promise»
And, turning around, he walked away. The boy didn’t move, shifting his gaze from the deserted road to He Tian, who was moving away. A noise sprang from an alley and GuanShan cursed himself, as he followed He Tian’s footsteps.
They walked at least five meters from each other, yet GuanShan still felt that strange pinch in his nose, compared to that of the bastard it was almost pleasant and light, like a warm breeze. He closed his eyes for a second and breathed in, founding himself quieter, relaxed. They reached the skyscraper and entered the elevator. GuanShan hesitated a long time before closing in such a cramped spot with He Tian. But He Tian was imperturbable, standing in front of him, giving him his shoulders and impassive as ever.
“Perhaps, I’m wrong?” GuanShan thought, looking at him while he was calling the floor number, should he ask him?
«Why?» he whispered, staring at his neck «How, how do you manage to …»
«Hold me?» He Tian said, preceded him, without turning. «Let’s say … I have a will of iron when I want to» he turned his eyes a little, staring at him with the corner of his eye «Although I must admit that you are putting me in serious difficulties»
«Tch … go fuck yourself» spat GuanShan crossing his arms.
«If it’s any consolation» He Tian continued with a grin «You also have a particular control, it’s weird»
«What would you know?!»
He Tian smiled, but GuanShan preferred to ignore him. The elevator stopped its run. The corridors were empty and the lights dim; GuanShan walked through the threshold and noticed that He Tian’s apartment looked increasingly empty and sterile. He Tian dug in a box pulling off a trouser and a shirt, then moved to the kitchen filling a glass of water and then giving it to GuanShan.
«You know where the bath is» he sighed, returning to the kitchen to empty the shopping bag.
«What’s the water for?»
He Tian chuckled, avoiding turning to «For what you bought at a pharmacy and for which you came out as an idiot at three in the morning»
GuanShan blushed «You bastard! This is none of your business! Stalker!» he ran into the bathroom slamming the door behind him.
In the bathroom (as big as his bedroom) He Tian’s smell was particularly strong, so much it made him feel dizzy.
“I need to hurry”
He stripped off as quickly as possible and threw himself under the hot water of the shower. The awareness of using He Tian’s shower caused him an annoying feeling at his stomach as if he was sharing something intimate and private. He tried to move as little as possible, avoiding to move his feet so he wouldn’t touch too many tiles. He didn’t want to leave too many traces.
He washed quickly and grabbed a towel, studying his face in the mirror: he had bruises on the left cheekbone and his right eye was a bit bloated, his lower lip had a cut and when he touched his head he felt a bump, aching and swollen.
“All in all I’m not that bad,” he thought, wiping his hair firmly. “If He Tian didn’t come,” a shiver spread through his spine. “Maybe… maybe I should thank him” just the idea gave him goosebumps so he grasped his trousers in search of the suppressants.
“Uh?” He said, feeling the right pocket empty “What the …” the left pocket was also empty.
He tugged on his pants, shaking them with force.
«They’re gone,» he said. At that point, the desire to desperately cry terrible curses was strong, damn strongly. Too bad it wouldn’t have returned the pills, nor the money he had spent.
«Fuck!» he hissed, throwing his pants against the mirror «Fuck, fuck, fuck». Why did he leave his house? What the fuck had jumped in his head? Damn Gao Peng, he would’ve killed him.
He sighed, placing his hands on the sink. There was a much bigger problem at the moment: He Tian. He seemed to know how to control himself but … how far could he trust him? He had to go home, but would he let him go out without the use of suppressants? No wait, He Tian couldn’t know he had lost them, he could tell him that he had taken them and ran home. It was a few blocks away; He didn’t want to risk… but at that moment he was in the wolf’s den, literally.
“All right,” he said, determined.
He dressed in He Tian’s clean shirt and trousers. He wiggles his nose when he finds out how oversized they were and how much they were full of the boy’s smell. He pulled the shirt to his nose and sniffed it gently, it was such a natural gesture to realize what he was doing just after a few seconds.
“What the hell is wrong with me?”
He drank the water and left the bathroom. He Tian was near the window and he was talking on the phone. GuanShan stopped, curious.
«Yes,» he heard him say. «It looks like him, no doubt. In the identity card, I got there is also the same name» GuanShan saw him throw an identity card on the ground, and from the photo, he recognized the asshole of a few hours earlier «I want you to crush his bank accounts, lose his job. So that everyone knows which son of a bitch he is. I want to see him crawl, get it? And if he tries to get nearby …» the voice from the other end of the cellphone seemed to interrupt him. «You get it,» he said to him. «So then… I’ll leave the rest to you» And then he closed the call.
“Huh,” GuanShan thought, remaining a few seconds behind the bathroom door, before opening it and then getting out. The two exchanged a glance and for some reason fell into an embarrassing silence, the atmosphere was strange, and GuanShan realized that as soon as He Tian immediately darted his eyes as if he had been stung by a needle.
«You were quick,» he said, throwing his cell phone on the bed and heading to the counter on which he had placed snacks and sweet sandwiches. «Hungry?».
«No I-» stammered, the redhead «I’m going home»
He Tian looked up, crunching a cracker «How much time does it takes?»
GuanShan tilted his head «What?»
«How much before the medicine work?»
«Oh, Uhm …» “Damn it!” He didn’t have the slightest idea! It ranged from product to product … he said the first thing that came to his mind. «T-ten minutes … more or less»
«Wait here, then go wherever you want»
«Don’t decide for me, asshole!»
«Don’t go if I don’t say so! Sit and wait for these ten miserable minutes! Or do you want me to tie you to bed?»
This last threat scared GuanShan, who sat down on the opposite side of the house, leaning his back on the cold glass wall.
“Why the bed?” He thought, tapping his forehead on his knees. And now? He could wait all night, but nothing would have happened, what should he do?
Suddenly he felt tired and had to fight hard not to close his eyes and hang himself there, on the floor. That damn smell had a strange effect on him.
«Hey,» said He Tian.
GuanShan sighed, holding his head low. «What do you want?»
«I know you’re pretty stupid but …»
“ This asshole…”
«Why didn’t you send someone else to buy them for you?»
GuanShan looked up, looking at him in rage. «You who are so smart don’t ask this stupid! You lazy bastard».
He Tian chuckled, shaking his head and lighting a cigarette. He took it to his lips, taking a big breath.
«Alright then» he walked thoughtfully, filling the room of the acrid smell of tobacco. Breathing it, GuanShan noticed something strange: that was the smell that He Tian usually had: tobacco and cologne water. What he felt during his heat was another thing: it was a smell not derived from the external elements … it came from He Tian himself, from his skin, from his breath. He couldn’t explain with words but it was something more … deep.
He shook his head, looking at the watch hanging over He Tian’s head: seven more minutes.
«So,» said the young man «Here’s my conclusion, which is, by the way, quite obvious» he rested his hip to the opposite wall, looking at a random spot over GuanShan’s head. «Pills are very expensive so you didn’t want to tell your parents about your conditions, so they wouldn’t have spent more money to buy it. For some reason today you needed them more than usual so you came out without telling anyone and … well, you did a very stupid thing».
GuanShan wrinkled his lips, annoyed by the fact that He Tian had guessed everything but most of all because hearing about his plan in that way it made it sound really stupid.
«Well look at that…apparently I’m right» grinned, He Tian
«Shut up! This is none of your business!» shouted GuanShan
“Four minutes, four minutes”
«What do you think you know? I-I had things to do»
«I know I would think twice before risking so much. Do you know how it is said? Living sick to die healthy. Maybe I’m not the one too attached to money, after all»
“This is too much”. The ten minutes had passed.
GuanShan stood up, too tired to argue.
«I’m leaving» but before he could only take one step, He Tian blocked his way. GuanShan looked at him badly, he knew he would not approach him.
«Nothing changed»
«What the fuck do you mean?»
«The suppressants» hear him say that word for the first time filled him with anger and embarrassment. «I can hold back, but … I can still “feel”, nothing has changed since you left the bathroom. No effect»
«T-that's not…» “Fuck! This is bad!”
He Tian stared at him, slowly stretching a hand, «Let me see, the pills»
GuanShan quickly moved his eyes from He Tian’s hand to his eyes «Why should I?»
«No reason. I want to see them»
Instinctively the guy stepped back, and He Tian seemed to realize everything «You lost them, didn’t you?»
GuanShan tightened his lips, lowering his gaze.
«And what if I did?»
«What if- ?!» He Tian took a few steps, then stopped, closing his eyes and clenching his fists.
He reopened them after a few seconds.
«You’re stupid. After what happened … in spite of everything …» he chuckled, shaking his head.«No.. You thought I wouldn’t notice it?»
GuanShan took a second step back «This is none of your fucking business»
The smile disappeared from He Tian’s lips, which, like a lightning strike, approached GuanShan, pushing him against the glass wall. He didn’t touch him. The distance between their bodies was just over a centimeter. GuanShan had He Tain’s chest right in front of his nose and despite all, he could feel the beats of his heart. They were fast and strong. Like the roar of thunder. He Tian’s face was just above his head on the left side. He breathed heavily … as if he were tasting the air. And his body emitted heat, burning like fire. The smell became so strong that it penetrated him to his brain. It wasn’t going well … at all. He Tian swallowed soundly, his hand slipping slowly over the window behind him.
«Do you know what you are?» whispered at that moment He Tian, his voice was profound, dry as if he was dying of thirst «Right now you are like a child with a knife in his hand. You feel safe about you, shaking it right and left, unaware of how dangerous it is for you … and for those close to you»
GuanShan’s breathing became irregular. His stomach, like all his blood, seemed to catch fire. He blushed on every inch of his skin, stiffening like a statue.
“Damn it…” he glanced down, taking the back of his right hand to his lips. Then on his forehead “Stay calm, stay calm”
«Even now» continued He Tian, lowering his face and nearing GuanShan’s cheek. «Do you realize how dangerous you are?»
“Getaway! Don’t touch me! ” wanted to shout GuanShan with all his strength but in opening his lips, no sound came out, or at least it seemed to him. He was confused, he had to move away from He Tian, now!
He raised his hands on the boy’s collarbone and pushed him with all his strength: he managed to move him by one step.
He Tian grabbed him for his elbows, lowering his head until he touched his head with his forehead. GuanShan tried to get away, but his movements were slow … soft. He tried to move He Tian’s head with his own, pushing him away. By contrast, He Tian continued to press his forehead on him, with just as much force as he made him almost hurt. That strange strength test continued for a while, with the hair of the two boys gently rubbing one with each other, the movements were slow, delicate … similar to caresses. Like the cats that dangle their heads against their companions as a sign of affection.
With a swift movement, GuanShan pushed up but inadvertently, He Tian’s face slipped into his hair, bringing them face to face.
He Tian’s eyes were half-open, and a strange heat was coming out of them. For a moment they lingered over those of GuanShan, then lowered slowly to his lips. Their faces were so close that GuanShan could see the boy’s dark hair move at the breath of his nose. He tried to release his arms from He Tian’s grip, but he didn’t get away, he held him too strong. The heat was unbearable as if it had a fever: it burned everywhere.
He Tian’s lips were half-open and … so close. He closed his eyes and his body floated lightly in the darkness where he closed, feeling a strange feeling, like a pleasant tingling throughout his body.
Then something soft rested on his lips. He opened his eyes, finding him there, leaning over him, with his lips gently resting on his. They too, burned. He moved away, turning his face and bringing his forearm to his lips.
«N-no …» he whispered
In contrast, He Tian grabbed his arm first, moving it away, then grabbing his chin, turning GuanShan towards him. He kissed him again, with more emphasis.
He Tian’s smell seemed to be strengthened as never before, so much that GuanShan believed he could taste it.
“This is bad …” he thought, “I can’t… I’m losing myself”
With the last shred of reason he had in his body, he tightened his lips, trying again to push him away.
He Tian answered that gesture biting his lower lip, licking it on the cut. He Tian’s hands caressed him with light movements moving over his clothes. First on the back, throughout its length, then on the chest following the rib line.
The kisses moved to the cheek, then to the ear.
«Asshole,» said GuanShan in a low voice «Pervert … no, stop»
He felt mortified, humiliated, he wanted to push him away, trample him like the scum that he was. But the energies had abandoned him. Once again his instinct was about to prevail, and unlike a few hours ago, this time his mind wanted to surrender too. Why? Why did the situation look so different from before?
With a sudden strike, He Tian’s hand clenched on GuanShan’s head, pulling his hair, forcing him to raise his head.
“Hot” GuanShan thought “I’m so hot …” he opened his mouth, looking for oxygen.
«This expression» whispered He Tian, more and closer «Are you provoking me?»
He Tian’s tongue slipped through the damp lips of GuanShan. He explored every corner, and GuanShan was lost in a thousand and more sensations that he had never experienced until then. An electric shock passed through his back to his brain, sending him in full short circuit. Their tongues intertwined in a frantic dance without the time of one breath.
He Tian’s lips were soft and good, sweet.
They continued for a long time until they were forced to breathe again. He Tian licked his lips, drying a string of saliva from GuanShan’s lips with his thumb.
The boy lowered his head, his legs became soft and he could not stand to his feet, shaking his head, looking down from it «What … what did you do to me?»
He Tian approached, widening GuanShan’s legs, placing a knee on his groin. He bit his left lobe, licking it slowly.
«I’m the one who’s supposed to ask that» he whispered. Even his voice was hot «Look what you did to me».
He took GuanShan’s right hand, slowly guiding it over the swelling of his pants.
GuanShan blushed, moving his hand so fast that it seemed to be burning.
«You’re a fucking pervert» he whispered, looking away
He Tian chuckled, licking him behind his ear «And what about this?» He Tian’s knee pushed higher, and GuanShan jumped up. It wasn’t painful. Horrified, he looked down on himself, noting that he was pretty excited himself.
«So?» continued He Tian, rubbing his leg more vehemently «Mhn?»
«S-stop!» GuanShan stretched out his arms, trying to move the boy’s leg. In contrast, He Tian threw himself on him with all his strength, pulling up one of his legs and making their hips join. He began to move without any modesty so that his thrusts would have enough friction to give pleasure to both of them. GuanShan once again forgot the world around him, his heat amplifying everything: the feel, the hearing, the smell. Every push of He Tian on his body brought him such pleasure that he had to bite his lips forcefully to hold back the sighs of pleasure that pushed to go out.
He Tian noticed it, lifted his face, forcing him into a kiss so he could open his mouth.
«I want to hear you» he whispered to his lips, before kissing him again «I want to hear your voice»
«N-no… mhn» He Tian’s tongue did not give up, preventing him to shut his mouth or catch his breath. The pushes were more and more concise and fast.
GuanShan shook his head, prey to his emotions. He raised his head, narrowing his eyes.
«Ah!» sighed, following the rhythm of a particularly strong push «Mnm … ngh …»
He Tian grinned, satisfied, grasping his ass and clinging tight to him, striding with more and more force. «Look at you … you have a perverse expression, you know?»
GuanShan closed his eyes and tightened his teeth with all his strength. He couldn’t allow He Tian to do as he wanted … not that way.
He leaped forward, clinging to He Tian’s back and biting him on his neck. He didn’t care and probably used more force than he wished to use. He felt He Tian whirring, pushing him against the glass wall. The black-haired boy placed his hand to his neck and looks almost surprised not to find it stained with blood. He glanced up at GuanShan, who was staring at him.
«You thought,» he said, «that I would stay silent while you were enjoying yourself?» he pointed his finger against him «In your dreams, you fucking bastard»
He Tian licked his lips, grinning «Are you sure that making me angry is a good idea?»
«WHO DO YOU THINK I AM?!» With an impetus and incredible speed, GuanShan loaded a fist, but He Tian stopped it very easily. Grasping his arm, he bent it firmly behind GuanShan’s back and pushed him without regard against the cold window.
GuanShan tightened his teeth, furious with himself. He watched the condensation of his breath, and the city beneath them shone intensely.
He was leaning on him, his big, warm chest over his back. His hips close on his. Something hard pressed on his bottom and already knew what it was. With the corner of his eye he saw him grin and approach dangerously to his lips; but GuanShan, frowning, turned away, leaning his forehead against the window.
He Tian chuckled, resting his lips on his nape and talking through his hair.
«So stubborn… maybe» his breath lowered, more and more «I should soften you a bit». He licked on his neck, right between his shoulder blades.
At that point, GuanShan opened his eyes, terrified. He tried to get away with all his strength, but He Tian didn’t feel any reason, and indeed he held him even stronger.
«H-hey» stammered the red «Are you kidding me? Let go!»
He Tian kept on kissing his neck, centimeter by centimeter. He knew what he was doing and it wasn’t good. If he had bitten him in that place, he would have formed a bond. GuanShan would be marked for life as He Tain’s companion, it would be his Omega. He didn’t … he couldn’t! Not that way, not so suddenly, he was too young and a bond would have forced him in the same way as a chain. He had too many things that he had to do.
“He can’t be serious”
«Enough!» with all his strength GuanShan bent his free arm, trying to pull away He Tian’s face. The black-haired grabbed his hand, licking the index first, then the middle. He turned him, staring at him
GuanShan swallowed at the sight of that look: he was completely lost in the excitement And his smell… GuanShan could be inebriated. He Tain kissed him again, with much, much more force. He grabbed his tongue biting it and licking it. He never had enough.
Once more, he stretched his face over his shoulder, turning him and heading toward his neck.
GuanShan grabbed his shirt, pale. He wasn’t reasonable, not anymore.
Desperate he grabbed him by the hair, at the cost of hurting him he pulled with all his strength; He Tian moaned, brushing himself over him. He was close to his neck, too close.
«Don’t do it ok? Listen to me!!» now he was practically kicking him. Annoyed He Tian threw him on the ground, leaning over him.
«Stop struggling» he whispered to his ear
«N-no!» GuanShan stretched out his hands, leveraging his forearms. He Tian’s hand moved on his back, pressing on the bump and making it hurt; He pushed him to the ground, immobilizing him. One of He Tian’s hands moved to his groin, slowly massaging GuanShan’s erection over his pants.
His thin lips touched him first on his shoulder, then the scapula and again on his neck.
GuanShan opened his eyes, trembling.
He heard He Tian’s tongue, his breathing, and excitement … and his teeth, which slowly began to press.
“Don’t do it” he thought “Please”
GuanShan’s head was in complete chaos and everything went out in a single terrified shout.
«HE TIAN!!!!!!!!!» cried GuanShan, with all his strength, burning his vocal cords.
Something broke in that instant. Suddenly the apartment was cold and silent. More empty than it had ever been.
With tight fists at the sides of his face, GuanShan didn’t even lookup. He clutched his teeth with force, cursing himself and cursing all the rest. He heard He Tian get up and get away; Without is weight and warmth he felt a painful cold feeling.
He listened to him walking a few steps, remaining anchored to the ground in his misery.
He heard a tinkling of keys and the opening of the apartment’s door.
«Sleep here,» said He Tian’s voice. It had a weird sound, which he couldn’t define «Later you can go home».
The door closed with a hit sound and immediately closed with three key turns.
GuanShan rubbed his forehead on the parquet, taking two deep breaths. He shook his head, punching it with fury until his knuckles bleed.
He sat down and looked down on him, disgusted in seeing how excited he was. He gets up, walking slowly toward the door, knowing that it was closed, but he lowered the handle anyway, pushing with force. Giving it a couple of kicks, hurting himself.
He passed his hand over his forehead, then his eyes and finally his neck, finding it still wet of He Tian’s kisses.
In the bathroom he washed his hands and face, forcing himself to not look in the mirror.
Returning to the room, he looked at the bed, but disgusted, he felt the smell of He Tian even at that distance. He crouched to the opposite side of the room, clenching his legs to his chest.
His mind was strangely empty, his stomach feeling heavy and turned like a sock. Something bothered him, something had gone in a way that didn’t give him peace. He had shouted his name so strong that he must have sounded terrified.
“Were you not?” whispered a voice in his head.
“I don’t know”
“Just like with that guy in the alley”
«NO!» He shouted suddenly, and he realized: it was regret. He felt guilty because He Tian, having heard him shouting like that, must have felt at the same level as that Alpha who had attacked him like an animal.
He bit his lower lip. “I’ll never feel guilty for that asshole.”
He lowered his eyes and closed them. A deep tiredness wound him and the clock ticking scanned a time he could no longer follow.
“I wonder,” he thought, while his sleep slowly wrapped him up. “What expression did he had … before leaving?”
A few hours later, GuanShan woke up thanks to the sun-lit daylight, which warmed the entire apartment. The night view was breathtaking, but even during the day, it was amazing. He was lying on his side and his back hurts so much. He had a headache, and the bump on his head seemed to be more swollen. He shook his head and noticed, a few feet away from him, a blue box.
He stood up, looking around: no trace of He Tian.
He grabbed the sealed box by turning it into his hands; They were suppressants. The ones he lost. He closed his eyes, sighing.
He Tian had written something on the box: “5 minutes”
Somehow GuanShan found himself laughing.
“Not ten huh,” he thought, opening the box and swallowing one of the pills.
So little, that was it. His body would stop being like a stranger and his enemy, people wouldn’t attack him on the street, and he would stop feeling like a fucking little girl.
He passed his hands through his hair, shaking his head.
“Ah,” he noticed, after a moment, pulling He Tian’s shirt “This smell … this too, will it fade away?”
He leaned against the wall, closing his eyes and breathing in slowly. Yes, five minutes, only five. For that little time, it would be granted, he would taste it a little more, slowly.
He closed his eyes, pulling the shirt even further.
“Not ten… huh”
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suchawonderfullife · 8 years ago
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2. My body is a Picasso
I’ve been incredibly fortunate in my journey to try some cutting-edge treatments in Australia, as well as having a very intelligent, compassionate and hard working CFS (chronic fatigue syndrome) specialist on my side. A specialist like that doesn’t come cheap either (very little if anything is covered by medicare so you have to be prepared to be out of pocket by tens if not hundreds of thousands over the years). He’s been my Dr for 8 years and yes he couldn’t get me better, but he has helped me in so many ways. 
He was able to diagnose a multitude of problems within my body through tests regular doctors would not have access to. His understanding and knowledge of CFS and what it does to the body on a cellular level is extraordinary. For those who know who I am talking about, they would agree that he is a brilliant man, who I owe my life to. He got me into private psych hospitals when I was suicidal, he got me in to see him on spur of the moment appointments to treat flu’s and tonsillitis so that a GP didn’t mess me up even more, he diagnosed me with Lyme Disease. Most of what I know about my body and these illnesses are because of him. 
My first 2 years of being chronically ill consisted of spending tens of thousands of dollars on testing and trialling supplements and medications. I did a tonne of research and learnt about “pacing” and other things I could do on my own to help my body repair. I did everything I was supposed to and my health slowly built back up to 80%. I went back to work part-time, back to Uni, I could leave my house almost everyday and things were getting better. Having a diagnosis of CFS without Lyme Disease (because it doesn’t exist in Australia), meant that the cause of my CFS was not being treated and therefore just a ticking time bomb. Of course I didn’t know this and neither did my doctor. 
So when I relapsed HARD, it was a complete shock to my doctor and myself. My heart became so bad I couldn’t shower standing up anymore, I couldn’t lift my arms above my head to wash my own hair, sitting up for longer than 10 minutes at a time was impossible, talking or paying attention to someone speaking to me was exhausting, looking at my phone or a computer made me feel incredibly ill and I was lucky to sleep 2 hours a night. 
It was terrifying to be this ill and not no why. I ended up on 5 injections, 52 tablets, oxygen therapy for 4 hours and drinking litres of special liquids every day. Without all these I would have been far worse than mentioned, but I wasn’t getting any better. 
You wouldn’t believe some of the tests I’ve done. I’ve peed into a huge jug over a 24 hour period and carried it into a pathology (multiple times), I’ve had to poo into a container and scrape pieces of it out to go into special containers and sent that off, I had to pee in complete darkness into a special container covered in foil because if any light hit my urine it would destroy whatever needed to be tested. Boy was that something I’ll never forget. I had to do it in my bedroom as I had blinds to make my room pitch black. Due to how sick I was, I wasn’t well enough to “squat” and hold my own weight, so I needed my mum in there to help hold me and being a girl you can’t really get your pee flowing unless you’re at least squatting. And how do you aim your pee as a female when you’re in total darkness? I’ll leave that one to your imagination. Being in my bedroom and not at a toilet wasn’t triggering whatever part of my brain was needed to tell my bladder to let it out and I possibly had stage fright from having someone standing there waiting for me to “go”. So it took some time and both my mum and I were getting quite frustrated. Then there was the logistics of finding the toilet paper, wiping, putting it into a bag once I’d finished and hoping I didn’t get any on the floor- all in pitch-black darkness. The things parents do for their kids huh? 
For you folks who hate needles, I could have 10 viles taken at each appointment if needed, I have permanent needle marks on my arm where blood gets taken because it happens so often. I also did a spit test, where I had to spit into this test tube and fill it to the top within a certain time frame. It was actually bloody hard to meet that deadline as I wasn’t allowed to drink for ages beforehand so I was dehydrated. My Dr also does a standing test for POTS (postural orthostatic tachycardia syndrome), which is one of my heart conditions. This is really horrible when you’re so sick as standing completely still for 20 minutes can be near impossible. Some patients faint before the 20 minutes are up due to lack of blood flow to their brain. I never fainted luckily, but my blood pressure would drop to something ridiculous like 45/60 and my heart rate would shoot up to 160bpm. I’d become very disoriented and brain-fogged due to oxygen not getting to my brain, my legs would shake with fatigue, I found it difficult to breathe let alone speak (the nurse would keep asking you how you’re feeling) as my heart was beating as if I was running.
Hydrogen breath tests suck too, for people that have done those. You go into a specific clinic, drink this disgusting liquid and then have to sit around for hours and have your breath tested every hour to see if you have an intolerance to foods like lactose and fructose. Being that I am intolerant, drinking a liquid containing things I’m intolerant to gave me gastro like symptoms, running to the toilet throughout my testing and feeling very bloated, nauseous and just yuck. Gastroscopy, colonoscopy, endoscopy, liver & kidney scans (very painful when they’re inflammed), I’ve been lucky enough to have all of those too!  
Then there’s the trialling of all the medications. Because when you have illnesses that are incurable and largely misunderstood, even regarded as not existing, you are essentially a guinea pig. It’s not only that, but every single CFS or Lyme patient has different symptoms and different biologies, which means all our treatments must be individualised and what works for one might not work for another. My body is also very sensitive to medications (it runs in my family) and having a bad reaction to things is common for my mum, brother and I. Every doctors appointment became a Russian roulette of new medications or supplements. “This test shows your body can’t absorb potassium, take 7 of these a day/ we found your stomach can’t produce acid to digest food, take these with every meal/ your mitochondria can’t produce energy, take this injection daily/ you’re chronically dehydrated, drink 2L of this a day/ you’re not producing the hormone that helps you sleep, take this highly addictive sleeping tablet plus these horrible tasting drops just before bed/ your blood pressure is too low, take this beta blocker.” The list just goes on and on. 
My body is like a Picasso- a jumbled mess, a masterful fuck-up, where down is up and up is down (actually this is sounding more like Dr. Suess). Nothing in my body makes sense or works how it should. So when I trial a medication that I react badly to, thats where you get side effects on top of chronic illness, I have to wean off it and start all over again with something different. I’ve tried hundreds of medications, supplements, tinctures, herbal remedies, whatever was recommended to me. Because I will do whatever it takes to get better and to just feel better. But the more I tried, the lower my success rate of finding things that actually worked. 
New doctors wouldn’t understand how seriously complex I am. A kinesiologist put me on some tinctures that made me seriously ill. My CFS Dr was furious because she wouldn’t have understood that putting me THAT b12 concoction would then irritate this part of my illness and he would never have let me take something like that. Then my Dr’s own colleague tried to treat me and she even made me really ill by telling me not to take certain things and trying others things, as she didn’t know my history for the last 6 years and wouldn’t have had time to read through my hundreds of tests and doctors notes over that time. Again my Dr was angry. This doesn’t make her negligent either, we are just so complex and confusing to the majority of the medical community, can you begin to understand why we are shunned as hypochondriacs or put in the “too hard” basket? 
This is what makes my CFS doctor so amazing, he never gives up on us. It can actually be traumatic for patients like myself throughout our fight to get better. We aren’t even heard, listened to or taken seriously. I had to yell and argue with my GP when I first got sick, just to get him to write me a referral to a CFS doctor because he didn’t “believe in it” and said I must just have low iron or something (he already tested it and it was within the spectrum). He even WORKED with a CFS doctor, so he had an easy connection and getting that referral was like extracting teeth. Years into my diagnosis he would then argue with me over prescriptions and why I needed to take certain things. “7 potassium tablets a day, you should be dead!” Yet I’d have my prescription bottles with me for proof. “Wow you’ve lost so much weight, you look great, are you working again now?” Would be his opening line to me as I slowly dragged myself into his office with a walking stick, barely able to stand or hold my own head up. I don’t think he’s a moron either (well he kind of is), but this is the general consensus of how people with my illnesses are treated by the people that should be helping us the most. So if I’m being frank with you here, the majority of the medical community are morons when it comes to illnesses like mine. They’re brilliant in many other ways, but that doesn’t help me or change my story. 
Can you imagine a cancer patient getting a positive test result or scan of a tumour and being told to just take some panadol (pain reliever), get out more and see a psychiatrist? Or you find a lump in your breast and want a scan, your doctor tells you you’ve imagined the lump, probably from stress or depression and that fatigue is because you need to exercise and lose some weight, then your imaginary lump will disappear. Later you find out your body is riddled with cancer, how angry would you be? My body is riddled with billions of deadly and destructive bacteria because of this ignorance and negligence towards certain illnesses. Can you imagine my anger when I was diagnosed with LATE STAGE Lyme Disease at age 24 and I should have been diagnosed in the hospital when I presented very clear symptoms at age 16. Instead the doctors found me a novelty, they kept coming in all night and gawking at me like a medical marvel. “What the hell is wrong with her? Those are some fucked up symptoms!” is what I imagine the talk outside my door would have been. Lyme Disease is more common than HIV/AIDS, it is not a unique or unheard of disease in the medical world. 
Anyway, so I was FINALLY diagnosed with Lyme Disease in 2013, better late than never, through overseas testing that costs upwards of $1,500-$2,000. So again, you better be rich if you want to get anywhere with treating this bastard illness. This is where the fun begins! 
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michaeljames1221 · 4 years ago
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Should I Go To Trial For DUI?
Percentage wise, very few cases actually go to trial because it would be a matter of having a good enough legal or factual issue to actually take the case to trial, along with actually having the funds to do that. Probably, somewhere around 1 or 2% of cases actually make their way to trial, whereas the vast majority of cases end up in a plea agreement with another small percentage ending in the dismissal of the case in full. Sometimes, there really would not be any risk involved in taking the case to trial but it would just be a matter of the financial aspect where it would often not necessarily be worth it for someone to pay thousands of dollars extra to take the case all the way to trial if there wasn’t a good likelihood they would win. The public defender would probably end up going to trial more often than a private attorney simply because there would be no additional funds required when taking the case to trial with a public defender.
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Unfortunately, a lot of attorneys are simply interested in their own pay day so they recommend their clients to go to trial and they tell them what they want to hear just so they would keep paying them and so they could get more money. One of the biggest determining factors is whether or not the person was asleep in their vehicle while they were parked on the side of the road or parked in a parking lot. One of the defenses against DUI charges is the Shelter Rule defense and this would apply if someone was in a parking lot and they were asleep. This rule basically says that as a society, we want to encourage people who are too drunk to be driving to pull over to the side of the road or pull into a parking lot and sleep off the affects of alcohol or find another way home. Unfortunately, officers are still looking for that type of scenario and they are arresting people and charging them with DUIs. Sometimes the cases that really should be dismissed are the ones that end up being more likely to go to trial because as an attorney I simply cannot recommend for my client to take a plea agreement to something they did not do. It would always be up to the client whether or not they wanted to take a plea agreement even if I had advised them it would be in their best interest to go to trial.
Realistically, the client could decide whatever reason they wanted to go to trial. The client would not have to explain their reasoning for why they wanted to go to trial, because it would be their constitutional right to go to trial. I would only be able to advise them with respect to my thoughts about them going to trial and what their options would be so they could make a fully informed decision on how they wanted to proceed. It would be perfectly fine if they wanted to go to trial and it would be perfectly fine if they wanted to take a plea agreement. DUI trials are expensive. You have at least one or two days in court and you have a lot of preparation time to get ready for a trial. Sometimes, you have the cost of an expert witness, if you need it. So it can be in the thousands of dollars for the cost of the trial. If you really want to do it and do it right. But like you mentioned, you have to weigh that with the risk of having a conviction. If you have some pretty good defenses and good explanations and you have a strong case, then it is worth it to spend the money to go to trial because the long term ramifications of a DUI conviction; the jail time, the possible loss of the license, can far outweigh the cost of the trial. There are statistics out there and analysis of the costs of a DUI and a DUI conviction. When you are talking rental cars and increased insurance, lost job opportunities, The cost can range anywhere up to $200,000, the possible long term ramifications of a DUI conviction. So if you can spend $5,000 to $10,000 on a trial for a DUI and get an acquittal, if you have some strong defenses, then it is well worth proceeding this way.
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One of the most important things that clients must know is the trial process, one is, they are giving control of the outcome of the case to someone else. If they are going to trial, they are letting a judge or juries determine the outcome of the case versus they are making the decision on a plea deal. And I think the second most important thing that I try to explain to them is the jury itself. They are given instructions to follow the law and weigh the evidence and to not make a decision until they have heard all of the evidence and there are a lot of things that go on in that jury room. But ultimately, you just never know and it is tough for members of juries, because in a small group like that, you have someone who is going to emerge as a leader. Sometimes that leader will tend to sway the others, a kind of pack mentality.
Whereas if you have a jury of eight or more people, you might have two pack leaders. You might have a pack leader for not guilty and you might have a pack leader for guilty. It would be tougher to get the whole jury to go guilty if you have a pack leader that is arguing for not guilty. Whereas if there are just four people and you have a pack leader of guilty, then the odds are greater, that there could be more guilty verdicts. It is just tougher. I am saying that with the four member jury, I believe the jury trials are tougher just because there are fewer people that have to make a decision, and in the smaller groups, people might be easier to sway one way or the other. I guess the vital thing would be is even though the jury was instructed to follow the law and not make a decision until they have heard everything, sometimes that they might not do that. They might have a certain feeling or a certain bias about maybe the way you look or if you did not testify, they might hold that against you and so it can be a big risk. So they need to know those things. Sometimes there should not be, but sometimes there is a distinction. When you are talking about representing, the attorney is there for them, the attorney might be dealing the very minimum, making sure just a brief overlook of the facts and moving on and looking for the best possible plea deal, or there is zealously advocating for your client where you do not leave any stone unturned so to speak. Even where you are not just taking a cursory look at the police report, you are going further, you are investigating the officer and you are looking at the blood test results. You are pulling information from the lab and the lab analyst and going over their training and qualifications; or the breath test machine.
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You are not just relying on the test result; you are pulling the maintenance certificates and the calibration records and seeing if there have been any problems with the machine. There is a difference there. Most DUI attorneys, they understand and they understand that to get a good outcome, they have to zealously advocate, they have to go and dig deeper into the case than just being there to represent someone. In almost every case, unless there are technical issues, we prefer a jury instead of just appearing in front of a judge. The reason being, the odds are better going in front of twelve of your peers versus going in front of a judge in order to obtain a not guilty verdict. In regards to how many cases go to trial, it depends on what attorney we are referring to. Typically about two percent of cases end up going to a jury trial. For some attorneys, it can go either way; it just depends on the cases. There might be times where ten percent or more of these cases will go to trial. But typically, the case that is going to trial is going to be the one where this is the wishes of the client. The client always has the right to go to a jury trial, and a typical trial case would be one where the chances of winning far out way the other.
Generally, most criminal defense attorneys are good lawyers who fight their DUI cases. There are some out there that never go to a jury trial. All they do is pleading their clients guilty, every time. Some of the criteria when considering a trial in defending a DUI case is what is the strength of the case the risk and the potential penalties. In many cases when a deal is offered, they will lose a trial. The penalties are not going to be that much different. In that case, you can afford it. If you have the time, go to trial, it is recommended. But there are a number of counties and cases where if you do go to trial, you are looking at a penalty that is much worse than if you do not. You want to make sure in those cases that you have a chance to win and that you can handle the consequences if you are found guilty. In a DUI case, for a first offense without any extra allegations, the maximum penalty is six months in jail, which means the worst that you would do if convicted is three months in jail. In most cases, the judge is not going to offer that light of a sentence. Most attorneys should be able to look at the possible penalties involved and then balance that with your chances of winning. We then start looking at all the different offenses involved, and we focus on a handful of defenses that we think will get the jury trial to come to a not guilty verdict. Worst case scenario is a hung jury and hopefully the DA will not refile and then case is over.
Different types of defenses that we look at are the elements of the offense. For example, drunk driving, you have to be driving, so we want to look at whether or not the officer saw you driving, whether the DA’s office can prove you were driving and was there a witness who saw you drive and called it in. The other issues are where you impaired when you were driving, or were you at or over a 0.08% blood alcohol level when you were driving. We would look at the field sobriety tests and other aspects of the case, the investigation that the officer did, video and audio reports of the actual driving, conversations, and then there are the chemical test results; which are the breath or blood testing and what procedures were utilized to administer them. Was there any margins in errors with the testing, issues with the machines or can they prove beyond a reasonable doubt that you were out or over a 0.08% BAC level and was the machine acting properly, working properly and were there issues with the blood test, was there some type of contamination and were there mycobacterium that could cause a false positive on a blood test. There are many different defenses, but in most cases, there is only one or a handful that might work. There are some attorneys who will avoid going to trial and almost always plead their clients guilty. These are also usually the same lawyers that quote shockingly low legal fees. Any individual who is charged with a DUI and consults with a potential lawyer should ask that attorney how many DUI bench or jury trials have they done in the last few years they have been practicing law.
youtube
It is surprising to most people how many DUI lawyers literally do not take cases in to trial. For me, taking a case to trial is one of the most enjoyable and rewarding parts of my job, because it is the culmination of all my studying, training, and experience. Not every DUI should go to trial, but I investigate, research, and prepare every case as if we are going to trial. The reason we take a case to trial is because, based on my review of the facts and law, I think I can produce a not guilty verdict in the case. The second reason is if we run out of options and our backs are against the wall, which is a pretty rare occurrence, but it does happen from time to time. If I evaluate a case and notice the facts and laws are on our side, I will recommend going to trial to my client and in the long run it is usually favorable. The decision to go to trial is sometimes difficult because the evidence is not as cut and dry or black and white as you would think. The evidence is frequently on the fence. A case could be dismissed if it was determined that there was no probable cause to make that traffic stop. A case can be dismissed if there was no probable cause to arrest them for a DUI. DUI cases can take years to go to trial. When a case does go to trial, the typical time is somewhere between six months and a year and a half. That is pretty standard because it takes a long time. Often motions happen before the trial. If you are released from jail and you are not in custody, you have a Constitutional right to a jury trial within 45 days of your arraignment. That is your first court date.
DUI Defense Attorneys Free Consultation
When you need legal help to defend against DUI Charges in Utah, please call Ascent Law LLC for your free consultation (801) 676-5506. We want to help you.
Ascent Law LLC 8833 S. Redwood Road, Suite C West Jordan, Utah 84088 United States Telephone: (801) 676-5506
Ascent Law LLC
4.9 stars – based on 67 reviews
Recent Posts
Utah Injury Lawyer
Family Law In UT
Bankruptcy And Foreclosure
Disposing Property After Divorce
Divorce Can Make Good People Bad
Post Foreclosure Liability For Code Violations
from Michael Anderson https://www.ascentlawfirm.com/should-i-go-to-trial-for-dui/
from Criminal Defense Lawyer West Jordan Utah https://criminaldefenselawyerwestjordanutah.wordpress.com/2020/06/04/should-i-go-to-trial-for-dui/
0 notes
advertphoto · 4 years ago
Text
Should I Go To Trial For DUI?
Percentage wise, very few cases actually go to trial because it would be a matter of having a good enough legal or factual issue to actually take the case to trial, along with actually having the funds to do that. Probably, somewhere around 1 or 2% of cases actually make their way to trial, whereas the vast majority of cases end up in a plea agreement with another small percentage ending in the dismissal of the case in full. Sometimes, there really would not be any risk involved in taking the case to trial but it would just be a matter of the financial aspect where it would often not necessarily be worth it for someone to pay thousands of dollars extra to take the case all the way to trial if there wasn’t a good likelihood they would win. The public defender would probably end up going to trial more often than a private attorney simply because there would be no additional funds required when taking the case to trial with a public defender.
youtube
Unfortunately, a lot of attorneys are simply interested in their own pay day so they recommend their clients to go to trial and they tell them what they want to hear just so they would keep paying them and so they could get more money. One of the biggest determining factors is whether or not the person was asleep in their vehicle while they were parked on the side of the road or parked in a parking lot. One of the defenses against DUI charges is the Shelter Rule defense and this would apply if someone was in a parking lot and they were asleep. This rule basically says that as a society, we want to encourage people who are too drunk to be driving to pull over to the side of the road or pull into a parking lot and sleep off the affects of alcohol or find another way home. Unfortunately, officers are still looking for that type of scenario and they are arresting people and charging them with DUIs. Sometimes the cases that really should be dismissed are the ones that end up being more likely to go to trial because as an attorney I simply cannot recommend for my client to take a plea agreement to something they did not do. It would always be up to the client whether or not they wanted to take a plea agreement even if I had advised them it would be in their best interest to go to trial.
Realistically, the client could decide whatever reason they wanted to go to trial. The client would not have to explain their reasoning for why they wanted to go to trial, because it would be their constitutional right to go to trial. I would only be able to advise them with respect to my thoughts about them going to trial and what their options would be so they could make a fully informed decision on how they wanted to proceed. It would be perfectly fine if they wanted to go to trial and it would be perfectly fine if they wanted to take a plea agreement. DUI trials are expensive. You have at least one or two days in court and you have a lot of preparation time to get ready for a trial. Sometimes, you have the cost of an expert witness, if you need it. So it can be in the thousands of dollars for the cost of the trial. If you really want to do it and do it right. But like you mentioned, you have to weigh that with the risk of having a conviction. If you have some pretty good defenses and good explanations and you have a strong case, then it is worth it to spend the money to go to trial because the long term ramifications of a DUI conviction; the jail time, the possible loss of the license, can far outweigh the cost of the trial. There are statistics out there and analysis of the costs of a DUI and a DUI conviction. When you are talking rental cars and increased insurance, lost job opportunities, The cost can range anywhere up to $200,000, the possible long term ramifications of a DUI conviction. So if you can spend $5,000 to $10,000 on a trial for a DUI and get an acquittal, if you have some strong defenses, then it is well worth proceeding this way.
youtube
One of the most important things that clients must know is the trial process, one is, they are giving control of the outcome of the case to someone else. If they are going to trial, they are letting a judge or juries determine the outcome of the case versus they are making the decision on a plea deal. And I think the second most important thing that I try to explain to them is the jury itself. They are given instructions to follow the law and weigh the evidence and to not make a decision until they have heard all of the evidence and there are a lot of things that go on in that jury room. But ultimately, you just never know and it is tough for members of juries, because in a small group like that, you have someone who is going to emerge as a leader. Sometimes that leader will tend to sway the others, a kind of pack mentality.
Whereas if you have a jury of eight or more people, you might have two pack leaders. You might have a pack leader for not guilty and you might have a pack leader for guilty. It would be tougher to get the whole jury to go guilty if you have a pack leader that is arguing for not guilty. Whereas if there are just four people and you have a pack leader of guilty, then the odds are greater, that there could be more guilty verdicts. It is just tougher. I am saying that with the four member jury, I believe the jury trials are tougher just because there are fewer people that have to make a decision, and in the smaller groups, people might be easier to sway one way or the other. I guess the vital thing would be is even though the jury was instructed to follow the law and not make a decision until they have heard everything, sometimes that they might not do that. They might have a certain feeling or a certain bias about maybe the way you look or if you did not testify, they might hold that against you and so it can be a big risk. So they need to know those things. Sometimes there should not be, but sometimes there is a distinction. When you are talking about representing, the attorney is there for them, the attorney might be dealing the very minimum, making sure just a brief overlook of the facts and moving on and looking for the best possible plea deal, or there is zealously advocating for your client where you do not leave any stone unturned so to speak. Even where you are not just taking a cursory look at the police report, you are going further, you are investigating the officer and you are looking at the blood test results. You are pulling information from the lab and the lab analyst and going over their training and qualifications; or the breath test machine.
youtube
You are not just relying on the test result; you are pulling the maintenance certificates and the calibration records and seeing if there have been any problems with the machine. There is a difference there. Most DUI attorneys, they understand and they understand that to get a good outcome, they have to zealously advocate, they have to go and dig deeper into the case than just being there to represent someone. In almost every case, unless there are technical issues, we prefer a jury instead of just appearing in front of a judge. The reason being, the odds are better going in front of twelve of your peers versus going in front of a judge in order to obtain a not guilty verdict. In regards to how many cases go to trial, it depends on what attorney we are referring to. Typically about two percent of cases end up going to a jury trial. For some attorneys, it can go either way; it just depends on the cases. There might be times where ten percent or more of these cases will go to trial. But typically, the case that is going to trial is going to be the one where this is the wishes of the client. The client always has the right to go to a jury trial, and a typical trial case would be one where the chances of winning far out way the other.
Generally, most criminal defense attorneys are good lawyers who fight their DUI cases. There are some out there that never go to a jury trial. All they do is pleading their clients guilty, every time. Some of the criteria when considering a trial in defending a DUI case is what is the strength of the case the risk and the potential penalties. In many cases when a deal is offered, they will lose a trial. The penalties are not going to be that much different. In that case, you can afford it. If you have the time, go to trial, it is recommended. But there are a number of counties and cases where if you do go to trial, you are looking at a penalty that is much worse than if you do not. You want to make sure in those cases that you have a chance to win and that you can handle the consequences if you are found guilty. In a DUI case, for a first offense without any extra allegations, the maximum penalty is six months in jail, which means the worst that you would do if convicted is three months in jail. In most cases, the judge is not going to offer that light of a sentence. Most attorneys should be able to look at the possible penalties involved and then balance that with your chances of winning. We then start looking at all the different offenses involved, and we focus on a handful of defenses that we think will get the jury trial to come to a not guilty verdict. Worst case scenario is a hung jury and hopefully the DA will not refile and then case is over.
Different types of defenses that we look at are the elements of the offense. For example, drunk driving, you have to be driving, so we want to look at whether or not the officer saw you driving, whether the DA’s office can prove you were driving and was there a witness who saw you drive and called it in. The other issues are where you impaired when you were driving, or were you at or over a 0.08% blood alcohol level when you were driving. We would look at the field sobriety tests and other aspects of the case, the investigation that the officer did, video and audio reports of the actual driving, conversations, and then there are the chemical test results; which are the breath or blood testing and what procedures were utilized to administer them. Was there any margins in errors with the testing, issues with the machines or can they prove beyond a reasonable doubt that you were out or over a 0.08% BAC level and was the machine acting properly, working properly and were there issues with the blood test, was there some type of contamination and were there mycobacterium that could cause a false positive on a blood test. There are many different defenses, but in most cases, there is only one or a handful that might work. There are some attorneys who will avoid going to trial and almost always plead their clients guilty. These are also usually the same lawyers that quote shockingly low legal fees. Any individual who is charged with a DUI and consults with a potential lawyer should ask that attorney how many DUI bench or jury trials have they done in the last few years they have been practicing law.
youtube
It is surprising to most people how many DUI lawyers literally do not take cases in to trial. For me, taking a case to trial is one of the most enjoyable and rewarding parts of my job, because it is the culmination of all my studying, training, and experience. Not every DUI should go to trial, but I investigate, research, and prepare every case as if we are going to trial. The reason we take a case to trial is because, based on my review of the facts and law, I think I can produce a not guilty verdict in the case. The second reason is if we run out of options and our backs are against the wall, which is a pretty rare occurrence, but it does happen from time to time. If I evaluate a case and notice the facts and laws are on our side, I will recommend going to trial to my client and in the long run it is usually favorable. The decision to go to trial is sometimes difficult because the evidence is not as cut and dry or black and white as you would think. The evidence is frequently on the fence. A case could be dismissed if it was determined that there was no probable cause to make that traffic stop. A case can be dismissed if there was no probable cause to arrest them for a DUI. DUI cases can take years to go to trial. When a case does go to trial, the typical time is somewhere between six months and a year and a half. That is pretty standard because it takes a long time. Often motions happen before the trial. If you are released from jail and you are not in custody, you have a Constitutional right to a jury trial within 45 days of your arraignment. That is your first court date.
DUI Defense Attorneys Free Consultation
When you need legal help to defend against DUI Charges in Utah, please call Ascent Law LLC for your free consultation (801) 676-5506. We want to help you.
Ascent Law LLC 8833 S. Redwood Road, Suite C West Jordan, Utah 84088 United States Telephone: (801) 676-5506
Ascent Law LLC
4.9 stars – based on 67 reviews
Recent Posts
Utah Injury Lawyer
Family Law In UT
Bankruptcy And Foreclosure
Disposing Property After Divorce
Divorce Can Make Good People Bad
Post Foreclosure Liability For Code Violations
Source: https://www.ascentlawfirm.com/should-i-go-to-trial-for-dui/
0 notes
mayarosa47 · 4 years ago
Text
Should I Go To Trial For DUI?
Percentage wise, very few cases actually go to trial because it would be a matter of having a good enough legal or factual issue to actually take the case to trial, along with actually having the funds to do that. Probably, somewhere around 1 or 2% of cases actually make their way to trial, whereas the vast majority of cases end up in a plea agreement with another small percentage ending in the dismissal of the case in full. Sometimes, there really would not be any risk involved in taking the case to trial but it would just be a matter of the financial aspect where it would often not necessarily be worth it for someone to pay thousands of dollars extra to take the case all the way to trial if there wasn’t a good likelihood they would win. The public defender would probably end up going to trial more often than a private attorney simply because there would be no additional funds required when taking the case to trial with a public defender.
Unfortunately, a lot of attorneys are simply interested in their own pay day so they recommend their clients to go to trial and they tell them what they want to hear just so they would keep paying them and so they could get more money. One of the biggest determining factors is whether or not the person was asleep in their vehicle while they were parked on the side of the road or parked in a parking lot. One of the defenses against DUI charges is the Shelter Rule defense and this would apply if someone was in a parking lot and they were asleep. This rule basically says that as a society, we want to encourage people who are too drunk to be driving to pull over to the side of the road or pull into a parking lot and sleep off the affects of alcohol or find another way home. Unfortunately, officers are still looking for that type of scenario and they are arresting people and charging them with DUIs. Sometimes the cases that really should be dismissed are the ones that end up being more likely to go to trial because as an attorney I simply cannot recommend for my client to take a plea agreement to something they did not do. It would always be up to the client whether or not they wanted to take a plea agreement even if I had advised them it would be in their best interest to go to trial.
Realistically, the client could decide whatever reason they wanted to go to trial. The client would not have to explain their reasoning for why they wanted to go to trial, because it would be their constitutional right to go to trial. I would only be able to advise them with respect to my thoughts about them going to trial and what their options would be so they could make a fully informed decision on how they wanted to proceed. It would be perfectly fine if they wanted to go to trial and it would be perfectly fine if they wanted to take a plea agreement. DUI trials are expensive. You have at least one or two days in court and you have a lot of preparation time to get ready for a trial. Sometimes, you have the cost of an expert witness, if you need it. So it can be in the thousands of dollars for the cost of the trial. If you really want to do it and do it right. But like you mentioned, you have to weigh that with the risk of having a conviction. If you have some pretty good defenses and good explanations and you have a strong case, then it is worth it to spend the money to go to trial because the long term ramifications of a DUI conviction; the jail time, the possible loss of the license, can far outweigh the cost of the trial. There are statistics out there and analysis of the costs of a DUI and a DUI conviction. When you are talking rental cars and increased insurance, lost job opportunities, The cost can range anywhere up to $200,000, the possible long term ramifications of a DUI conviction. So if you can spend $5,000 to $10,000 on a trial for a DUI and get an acquittal, if you have some strong defenses, then it is well worth proceeding this way.
One of the most important things that clients must know is the trial process, one is, they are giving control of the outcome of the case to someone else. If they are going to trial, they are letting a judge or juries determine the outcome of the case versus they are making the decision on a plea deal. And I think the second most important thing that I try to explain to them is the jury itself. They are given instructions to follow the law and weigh the evidence and to not make a decision until they have heard all of the evidence and there are a lot of things that go on in that jury room. But ultimately, you just never know and it is tough for members of juries, because in a small group like that, you have someone who is going to emerge as a leader. Sometimes that leader will tend to sway the others, a kind of pack mentality.
Whereas if you have a jury of eight or more people, you might have two pack leaders. You might have a pack leader for not guilty and you might have a pack leader for guilty. It would be tougher to get the whole jury to go guilty if you have a pack leader that is arguing for not guilty. Whereas if there are just four people and you have a pack leader of guilty, then the odds are greater, that there could be more guilty verdicts. It is just tougher. I am saying that with the four member jury, I believe the jury trials are tougher just because there are fewer people that have to make a decision, and in the smaller groups, people might be easier to sway one way or the other. I guess the vital thing would be is even though the jury was instructed to follow the law and not make a decision until they have heard everything, sometimes that they might not do that. They might have a certain feeling or a certain bias about maybe the way you look or if you did not testify, they might hold that against you and so it can be a big risk. So they need to know those things. Sometimes there should not be, but sometimes there is a distinction. When you are talking about representing, the attorney is there for them, the attorney might be dealing the very minimum, making sure just a brief overlook of the facts and moving on and looking for the best possible plea deal, or there is zealously advocating for your client where you do not leave any stone unturned so to speak. Even where you are not just taking a cursory look at the police report, you are going further, you are investigating the officer and you are looking at the blood test results. You are pulling information from the lab and the lab analyst and going over their training and qualifications; or the breath test machine.
You are not just relying on the test result; you are pulling the maintenance certificates and the calibration records and seeing if there have been any problems with the machine. There is a difference there. Most DUI attorneys, they understand and they understand that to get a good outcome, they have to zealously advocate, they have to go and dig deeper into the case than just being there to represent someone. In almost every case, unless there are technical issues, we prefer a jury instead of just appearing in front of a judge. The reason being, the odds are better going in front of twelve of your peers versus going in front of a judge in order to obtain a not guilty verdict. In regards to how many cases go to trial, it depends on what attorney we are referring to. Typically about two percent of cases end up going to a jury trial. For some attorneys, it can go either way; it just depends on the cases. There might be times where ten percent or more of these cases will go to trial. But typically, the case that is going to trial is going to be the one where this is the wishes of the client. The client always has the right to go to a jury trial, and a typical trial case would be one where the chances of winning far out way the other.
Generally, most criminal defense attorneys are good lawyers who fight their DUI cases. There are some out there that never go to a jury trial. All they do is pleading their clients guilty, every time. Some of the criteria when considering a trial in defending a DUI case is what is the strength of the case the risk and the potential penalties. In many cases when a deal is offered, they will lose a trial. The penalties are not going to be that much different. In that case, you can afford it. If you have the time, go to trial, it is recommended. But there are a number of counties and cases where if you do go to trial, you are looking at a penalty that is much worse than if you do not. You want to make sure in those cases that you have a chance to win and that you can handle the consequences if you are found guilty. In a DUI case, for a first offense without any extra allegations, the maximum penalty is six months in jail, which means the worst that you would do if convicted is three months in jail. In most cases, the judge is not going to offer that light of a sentence. Most attorneys should be able to look at the possible penalties involved and then balance that with your chances of winning. We then start looking at all the different offenses involved, and we focus on a handful of defenses that we think will get the jury trial to come to a not guilty verdict. Worst case scenario is a hung jury and hopefully the DA will not refile and then case is over.
Different types of defenses that we look at are the elements of the offense. For example, drunk driving, you have to be driving, so we want to look at whether or not the officer saw you driving, whether the DA’s office can prove you were driving and was there a witness who saw you drive and called it in. The other issues are where you impaired when you were driving, or were you at or over a 0.08% blood alcohol level when you were driving. We would look at the field sobriety tests and other aspects of the case, the investigation that the officer did, video and audio reports of the actual driving, conversations, and then there are the chemical test results; which are the breath or blood testing and what procedures were utilized to administer them. Was there any margins in errors with the testing, issues with the machines or can they prove beyond a reasonable doubt that you were out or over a 0.08% BAC level and was the machine acting properly, working properly and were there issues with the blood test, was there some type of contamination and were there mycobacterium that could cause a false positive on a blood test. There are many different defenses, but in most cases, there is only one or a handful that might work. There are some attorneys who will avoid going to trial and almost always plead their clients guilty. These are also usually the same lawyers that quote shockingly low legal fees. Any individual who is charged with a DUI and consults with a potential lawyer should ask that attorney how many DUI bench or jury trials have they done in the last few years they have been practicing law.
It is surprising to most people how many DUI lawyers literally do not take cases in to trial. For me, taking a case to trial is one of the most enjoyable and rewarding parts of my job, because it is the culmination of all my studying, training, and experience. Not every DUI should go to trial, but I investigate, research, and prepare every case as if we are going to trial. The reason we take a case to trial is because, based on my review of the facts and law, I think I can produce a not guilty verdict in the case. The second reason is if we run out of options and our backs are against the wall, which is a pretty rare occurrence, but it does happen from time to time. If I evaluate a case and notice the facts and laws are on our side, I will recommend going to trial to my client and in the long run it is usually favorable. The decision to go to trial is sometimes difficult because the evidence is not as cut and dry or black and white as you would think. The evidence is frequently on the fence. A case could be dismissed if it was determined that there was no probable cause to make that traffic stop. A case can be dismissed if there was no probable cause to arrest them for a DUI. DUI cases can take years to go to trial. When a case does go to trial, the typical time is somewhere between six months and a year and a half. That is pretty standard because it takes a long time. Often motions happen before the trial. If you are released from jail and you are not in custody, you have a Constitutional right to a jury trial within 45 days of your arraignment. That is your first court date.
DUI Defense Attorneys Free Consultation
When you need legal help to defend against DUI Charges in Utah, please call Ascent Law LLC for your free consultation (801) 676-5506. We want to help you.
Ascent Law LLC 8833 S. Redwood Road, Suite C West Jordan, Utah 84088 United States Telephone: (801) 676-5506
Ascent Law LLC
4.9 stars – based on 67 reviews
Recent Posts
Utah Injury Lawyer
Family Law In UT
Bankruptcy And Foreclosure
Disposing Property After Divorce
Divorce Can Make Good People Bad
Post Foreclosure Liability For Code Violations
from https://www.ascentlawfirm.com/should-i-go-to-trial-for-dui/
from Criminal Defense Lawyer West Jordan Utah - Blog http://criminaldefenselawyerwestjordanutah.weebly.com/blog/should-i-go-to-trial-for-dui
0 notes
aretia · 4 years ago
Text
Should I Go To Trial For DUI?
Percentage wise, very few cases actually go to trial because it would be a matter of having a good enough legal or factual issue to actually take the case to trial, along with actually having the funds to do that. Probably, somewhere around 1 or 2% of cases actually make their way to trial, whereas the vast majority of cases end up in a plea agreement with another small percentage ending in the dismissal of the case in full. Sometimes, there really would not be any risk involved in taking the case to trial but it would just be a matter of the financial aspect where it would often not necessarily be worth it for someone to pay thousands of dollars extra to take the case all the way to trial if there wasn’t a good likelihood they would win. The public defender would probably end up going to trial more often than a private attorney simply because there would be no additional funds required when taking the case to trial with a public defender.
youtube
Unfortunately, a lot of attorneys are simply interested in their own pay day so they recommend their clients to go to trial and they tell them what they want to hear just so they would keep paying them and so they could get more money. One of the biggest determining factors is whether or not the person was asleep in their vehicle while they were parked on the side of the road or parked in a parking lot. One of the defenses against DUI charges is the Shelter Rule defense and this would apply if someone was in a parking lot and they were asleep. This rule basically says that as a society, we want to encourage people who are too drunk to be driving to pull over to the side of the road or pull into a parking lot and sleep off the affects of alcohol or find another way home. Unfortunately, officers are still looking for that type of scenario and they are arresting people and charging them with DUIs. Sometimes the cases that really should be dismissed are the ones that end up being more likely to go to trial because as an attorney I simply cannot recommend for my client to take a plea agreement to something they did not do. It would always be up to the client whether or not they wanted to take a plea agreement even if I had advised them it would be in their best interest to go to trial.
Realistically, the client could decide whatever reason they wanted to go to trial. The client would not have to explain their reasoning for why they wanted to go to trial, because it would be their constitutional right to go to trial. I would only be able to advise them with respect to my thoughts about them going to trial and what their options would be so they could make a fully informed decision on how they wanted to proceed. It would be perfectly fine if they wanted to go to trial and it would be perfectly fine if they wanted to take a plea agreement. DUI trials are expensive. You have at least one or two days in court and you have a lot of preparation time to get ready for a trial. Sometimes, you have the cost of an expert witness, if you need it. So it can be in the thousands of dollars for the cost of the trial. If you really want to do it and do it right. But like you mentioned, you have to weigh that with the risk of having a conviction. If you have some pretty good defenses and good explanations and you have a strong case, then it is worth it to spend the money to go to trial because the long term ramifications of a DUI conviction; the jail time, the possible loss of the license, can far outweigh the cost of the trial. There are statistics out there and analysis of the costs of a DUI and a DUI conviction. When you are talking rental cars and increased insurance, lost job opportunities, The cost can range anywhere up to $200,000, the possible long term ramifications of a DUI conviction. So if you can spend $5,000 to $10,000 on a trial for a DUI and get an acquittal, if you have some strong defenses, then it is well worth proceeding this way.
youtube
One of the most important things that clients must know is the trial process, one is, they are giving control of the outcome of the case to someone else. If they are going to trial, they are letting a judge or juries determine the outcome of the case versus they are making the decision on a plea deal. And I think the second most important thing that I try to explain to them is the jury itself. They are given instructions to follow the law and weigh the evidence and to not make a decision until they have heard all of the evidence and there are a lot of things that go on in that jury room. But ultimately, you just never know and it is tough for members of juries, because in a small group like that, you have someone who is going to emerge as a leader. Sometimes that leader will tend to sway the others, a kind of pack mentality.
Whereas if you have a jury of eight or more people, you might have two pack leaders. You might have a pack leader for not guilty and you might have a pack leader for guilty. It would be tougher to get the whole jury to go guilty if you have a pack leader that is arguing for not guilty. Whereas if there are just four people and you have a pack leader of guilty, then the odds are greater, that there could be more guilty verdicts. It is just tougher. I am saying that with the four member jury, I believe the jury trials are tougher just because there are fewer people that have to make a decision, and in the smaller groups, people might be easier to sway one way or the other. I guess the vital thing would be is even though the jury was instructed to follow the law and not make a decision until they have heard everything, sometimes that they might not do that. They might have a certain feeling or a certain bias about maybe the way you look or if you did not testify, they might hold that against you and so it can be a big risk. So they need to know those things. Sometimes there should not be, but sometimes there is a distinction. When you are talking about representing, the attorney is there for them, the attorney might be dealing the very minimum, making sure just a brief overlook of the facts and moving on and looking for the best possible plea deal, or there is zealously advocating for your client where you do not leave any stone unturned so to speak. Even where you are not just taking a cursory look at the police report, you are going further, you are investigating the officer and you are looking at the blood test results. You are pulling information from the lab and the lab analyst and going over their training and qualifications; or the breath test machine.
youtube
You are not just relying on the test result; you are pulling the maintenance certificates and the calibration records and seeing if there have been any problems with the machine. There is a difference there. Most DUI attorneys, they understand and they understand that to get a good outcome, they have to zealously advocate, they have to go and dig deeper into the case than just being there to represent someone. In almost every case, unless there are technical issues, we prefer a jury instead of just appearing in front of a judge. The reason being, the odds are better going in front of twelve of your peers versus going in front of a judge in order to obtain a not guilty verdict. In regards to how many cases go to trial, it depends on what attorney we are referring to. Typically about two percent of cases end up going to a jury trial. For some attorneys, it can go either way; it just depends on the cases. There might be times where ten percent or more of these cases will go to trial. But typically, the case that is going to trial is going to be the one where this is the wishes of the client. The client always has the right to go to a jury trial, and a typical trial case would be one where the chances of winning far out way the other.
Generally, most criminal defense attorneys are good lawyers who fight their DUI cases. There are some out there that never go to a jury trial. All they do is pleading their clients guilty, every time. Some of the criteria when considering a trial in defending a DUI case is what is the strength of the case the risk and the potential penalties. In many cases when a deal is offered, they will lose a trial. The penalties are not going to be that much different. In that case, you can afford it. If you have the time, go to trial, it is recommended. But there are a number of counties and cases where if you do go to trial, you are looking at a penalty that is much worse than if you do not. You want to make sure in those cases that you have a chance to win and that you can handle the consequences if you are found guilty. In a DUI case, for a first offense without any extra allegations, the maximum penalty is six months in jail, which means the worst that you would do if convicted is three months in jail. In most cases, the judge is not going to offer that light of a sentence. Most attorneys should be able to look at the possible penalties involved and then balance that with your chances of winning. We then start looking at all the different offenses involved, and we focus on a handful of defenses that we think will get the jury trial to come to a not guilty verdict. Worst case scenario is a hung jury and hopefully the DA will not refile and then case is over.
Different types of defenses that we look at are the elements of the offense. For example, drunk driving, you have to be driving, so we want to look at whether or not the officer saw you driving, whether the DA’s office can prove you were driving and was there a witness who saw you drive and called it in. The other issues are where you impaired when you were driving, or were you at or over a 0.08% blood alcohol level when you were driving. We would look at the field sobriety tests and other aspects of the case, the investigation that the officer did, video and audio reports of the actual driving, conversations, and then there are the chemical test results; which are the breath or blood testing and what procedures were utilized to administer them. Was there any margins in errors with the testing, issues with the machines or can they prove beyond a reasonable doubt that you were out or over a 0.08% BAC level and was the machine acting properly, working properly and were there issues with the blood test, was there some type of contamination and were there mycobacterium that could cause a false positive on a blood test. There are many different defenses, but in most cases, there is only one or a handful that might work. There are some attorneys who will avoid going to trial and almost always plead their clients guilty. These are also usually the same lawyers that quote shockingly low legal fees. Any individual who is charged with a DUI and consults with a potential lawyer should ask that attorney how many DUI bench or jury trials have they done in the last few years they have been practicing law.
youtube
It is surprising to most people how many DUI lawyers literally do not take cases in to trial. For me, taking a case to trial is one of the most enjoyable and rewarding parts of my job, because it is the culmination of all my studying, training, and experience. Not every DUI should go to trial, but I investigate, research, and prepare every case as if we are going to trial. The reason we take a case to trial is because, based on my review of the facts and law, I think I can produce a not guilty verdict in the case. The second reason is if we run out of options and our backs are against the wall, which is a pretty rare occurrence, but it does happen from time to time. If I evaluate a case and notice the facts and laws are on our side, I will recommend going to trial to my client and in the long run it is usually favorable. The decision to go to trial is sometimes difficult because the evidence is not as cut and dry or black and white as you would think. The evidence is frequently on the fence. A case could be dismissed if it was determined that there was no probable cause to make that traffic stop. A case can be dismissed if there was no probable cause to arrest them for a DUI. DUI cases can take years to go to trial. When a case does go to trial, the typical time is somewhere between six months and a year and a half. That is pretty standard because it takes a long time. Often motions happen before the trial. If you are released from jail and you are not in custody, you have a Constitutional right to a jury trial within 45 days of your arraignment. That is your first court date.
DUI Defense Attorneys Free Consultation
When you need legal help to defend against DUI Charges in Utah, please call Ascent Law LLC for your free consultation (801) 676-5506. We want to help you.
Ascent Law LLC 8833 S. Redwood Road, Suite C West Jordan, Utah 84088 United States Telephone: (801) 676-5506
Ascent Law LLC
4.9 stars – based on 67 reviews
Recent Posts
Utah Injury Lawyer
Family Law In UT
Bankruptcy And Foreclosure
Disposing Property After Divorce
Divorce Can Make Good People Bad
Post Foreclosure Liability For Code Violations
Source: https://www.ascentlawfirm.com/should-i-go-to-trial-for-dui/
0 notes
Text
Should I Go To Trial For DUI?
Percentage wise, very few cases actually go to trial because it would be a matter of having a good enough legal or factual issue to actually take the case to trial, along with actually having the funds to do that. Probably, somewhere around 1 or 2% of cases actually make their way to trial, whereas the vast majority of cases end up in a plea agreement with another small percentage ending in the dismissal of the case in full. Sometimes, there really would not be any risk involved in taking the case to trial but it would just be a matter of the financial aspect where it would often not necessarily be worth it for someone to pay thousands of dollars extra to take the case all the way to trial if there wasn’t a good likelihood they would win. The public defender would probably end up going to trial more often than a private attorney simply because there would be no additional funds required when taking the case to trial with a public defender.
youtube
Unfortunately, a lot of attorneys are simply interested in their own pay day so they recommend their clients to go to trial and they tell them what they want to hear just so they would keep paying them and so they could get more money. One of the biggest determining factors is whether or not the person was asleep in their vehicle while they were parked on the side of the road or parked in a parking lot. One of the defenses against DUI charges is the Shelter Rule defense and this would apply if someone was in a parking lot and they were asleep. This rule basically says that as a society, we want to encourage people who are too drunk to be driving to pull over to the side of the road or pull into a parking lot and sleep off the affects of alcohol or find another way home. Unfortunately, officers are still looking for that type of scenario and they are arresting people and charging them with DUIs. Sometimes the cases that really should be dismissed are the ones that end up being more likely to go to trial because as an attorney I simply cannot recommend for my client to take a plea agreement to something they did not do. It would always be up to the client whether or not they wanted to take a plea agreement even if I had advised them it would be in their best interest to go to trial.
Realistically, the client could decide whatever reason they wanted to go to trial. The client would not have to explain their reasoning for why they wanted to go to trial, because it would be their constitutional right to go to trial. I would only be able to advise them with respect to my thoughts about them going to trial and what their options would be so they could make a fully informed decision on how they wanted to proceed. It would be perfectly fine if they wanted to go to trial and it would be perfectly fine if they wanted to take a plea agreement. DUI trials are expensive. You have at least one or two days in court and you have a lot of preparation time to get ready for a trial. Sometimes, you have the cost of an expert witness, if you need it. So it can be in the thousands of dollars for the cost of the trial. If you really want to do it and do it right. But like you mentioned, you have to weigh that with the risk of having a conviction. If you have some pretty good defenses and good explanations and you have a strong case, then it is worth it to spend the money to go to trial because the long term ramifications of a DUI conviction; the jail time, the possible loss of the license, can far outweigh the cost of the trial. There are statistics out there and analysis of the costs of a DUI and a DUI conviction. When you are talking rental cars and increased insurance, lost job opportunities, The cost can range anywhere up to $200,000, the possible long term ramifications of a DUI conviction. So if you can spend $5,000 to $10,000 on a trial for a DUI and get an acquittal, if you have some strong defenses, then it is well worth proceeding this way.
youtube
One of the most important things that clients must know is the trial process, one is, they are giving control of the outcome of the case to someone else. If they are going to trial, they are letting a judge or juries determine the outcome of the case versus they are making the decision on a plea deal. And I think the second most important thing that I try to explain to them is the jury itself. They are given instructions to follow the law and weigh the evidence and to not make a decision until they have heard all of the evidence and there are a lot of things that go on in that jury room. But ultimately, you just never know and it is tough for members of juries, because in a small group like that, you have someone who is going to emerge as a leader. Sometimes that leader will tend to sway the others, a kind of pack mentality.
Whereas if you have a jury of eight or more people, you might have two pack leaders. You might have a pack leader for not guilty and you might have a pack leader for guilty. It would be tougher to get the whole jury to go guilty if you have a pack leader that is arguing for not guilty. Whereas if there are just four people and you have a pack leader of guilty, then the odds are greater, that there could be more guilty verdicts. It is just tougher. I am saying that with the four member jury, I believe the jury trials are tougher just because there are fewer people that have to make a decision, and in the smaller groups, people might be easier to sway one way or the other. I guess the vital thing would be is even though the jury was instructed to follow the law and not make a decision until they have heard everything, sometimes that they might not do that. They might have a certain feeling or a certain bias about maybe the way you look or if you did not testify, they might hold that against you and so it can be a big risk. So they need to know those things. Sometimes there should not be, but sometimes there is a distinction. When you are talking about representing, the attorney is there for them, the attorney might be dealing the very minimum, making sure just a brief overlook of the facts and moving on and looking for the best possible plea deal, or there is zealously advocating for your client where you do not leave any stone unturned so to speak. Even where you are not just taking a cursory look at the police report, you are going further, you are investigating the officer and you are looking at the blood test results. You are pulling information from the lab and the lab analyst and going over their training and qualifications; or the breath test machine.
youtube
You are not just relying on the test result; you are pulling the maintenance certificates and the calibration records and seeing if there have been any problems with the machine. There is a difference there. Most DUI attorneys, they understand and they understand that to get a good outcome, they have to zealously advocate, they have to go and dig deeper into the case than just being there to represent someone. In almost every case, unless there are technical issues, we prefer a jury instead of just appearing in front of a judge. The reason being, the odds are better going in front of twelve of your peers versus going in front of a judge in order to obtain a not guilty verdict. In regards to how many cases go to trial, it depends on what attorney we are referring to. Typically about two percent of cases end up going to a jury trial. For some attorneys, it can go either way; it just depends on the cases. There might be times where ten percent or more of these cases will go to trial. But typically, the case that is going to trial is going to be the one where this is the wishes of the client. The client always has the right to go to a jury trial, and a typical trial case would be one where the chances of winning far out way the other.
Generally, most criminal defense attorneys are good lawyers who fight their DUI cases. There are some out there that never go to a jury trial. All they do is pleading their clients guilty, every time. Some of the criteria when considering a trial in defending a DUI case is what is the strength of the case the risk and the potential penalties. In many cases when a deal is offered, they will lose a trial. The penalties are not going to be that much different. In that case, you can afford it. If you have the time, go to trial, it is recommended. But there are a number of counties and cases where if you do go to trial, you are looking at a penalty that is much worse than if you do not. You want to make sure in those cases that you have a chance to win and that you can handle the consequences if you are found guilty. In a DUI case, for a first offense without any extra allegations, the maximum penalty is six months in jail, which means the worst that you would do if convicted is three months in jail. In most cases, the judge is not going to offer that light of a sentence. Most attorneys should be able to look at the possible penalties involved and then balance that with your chances of winning. We then start looking at all the different offenses involved, and we focus on a handful of defenses that we think will get the jury trial to come to a not guilty verdict. Worst case scenario is a hung jury and hopefully the DA will not refile and then case is over.
Different types of defenses that we look at are the elements of the offense. For example, drunk driving, you have to be driving, so we want to look at whether or not the officer saw you driving, whether the DA’s office can prove you were driving and was there a witness who saw you drive and called it in. The other issues are where you impaired when you were driving, or were you at or over a 0.08% blood alcohol level when you were driving. We would look at the field sobriety tests and other aspects of the case, the investigation that the officer did, video and audio reports of the actual driving, conversations, and then there are the chemical test results; which are the breath or blood testing and what procedures were utilized to administer them. Was there any margins in errors with the testing, issues with the machines or can they prove beyond a reasonable doubt that you were out or over a 0.08% BAC level and was the machine acting properly, working properly and were there issues with the blood test, was there some type of contamination and were there mycobacterium that could cause a false positive on a blood test. There are many different defenses, but in most cases, there is only one or a handful that might work. There are some attorneys who will avoid going to trial and almost always plead their clients guilty. These are also usually the same lawyers that quote shockingly low legal fees. Any individual who is charged with a DUI and consults with a potential lawyer should ask that attorney how many DUI bench or jury trials have they done in the last few years they have been practicing law.
youtube
It is surprising to most people how many DUI lawyers literally do not take cases in to trial. For me, taking a case to trial is one of the most enjoyable and rewarding parts of my job, because it is the culmination of all my studying, training, and experience. Not every DUI should go to trial, but I investigate, research, and prepare every case as if we are going to trial. The reason we take a case to trial is because, based on my review of the facts and law, I think I can produce a not guilty verdict in the case. The second reason is if we run out of options and our backs are against the wall, which is a pretty rare occurrence, but it does happen from time to time. If I evaluate a case and notice the facts and laws are on our side, I will recommend going to trial to my client and in the long run it is usually favorable. The decision to go to trial is sometimes difficult because the evidence is not as cut and dry or black and white as you would think. The evidence is frequently on the fence. A case could be dismissed if it was determined that there was no probable cause to make that traffic stop. A case can be dismissed if there was no probable cause to arrest them for a DUI. DUI cases can take years to go to trial. When a case does go to trial, the typical time is somewhere between six months and a year and a half. That is pretty standard because it takes a long time. Often motions happen before the trial. If you are released from jail and you are not in custody, you have a Constitutional right to a jury trial within 45 days of your arraignment. That is your first court date.
DUI Defense Attorneys Free Consultation
When you need legal help to defend against DUI Charges in Utah, please call Ascent Law LLC for your free consultation (801) 676-5506. We want to help you.
Ascent Law LLC 8833 S. Redwood Road, Suite C West Jordan, Utah 84088 United States Telephone: (801) 676-5506
Ascent Law LLC
4.9 stars – based on 67 reviews
Recent Posts
Utah Injury Lawyer
Family Law In UT
Bankruptcy And Foreclosure
Disposing Property After Divorce
Divorce Can Make Good People Bad
Post Foreclosure Liability For Code Violations
Source: https://www.ascentlawfirm.com/should-i-go-to-trial-for-dui/
0 notes
melissawalker01 · 4 years ago
Text
Should I Go To Trial For DUI?
Percentage wise, very few cases actually go to trial because it would be a matter of having a good enough legal or factual issue to actually take the case to trial, along with actually having the funds to do that. Probably, somewhere around 1 or 2% of cases actually make their way to trial, whereas the vast majority of cases end up in a plea agreement with another small percentage ending in the dismissal of the case in full. Sometimes, there really would not be any risk involved in taking the case to trial but it would just be a matter of the financial aspect where it would often not necessarily be worth it for someone to pay thousands of dollars extra to take the case all the way to trial if there wasn’t a good likelihood they would win. The public defender would probably end up going to trial more often than a private attorney simply because there would be no additional funds required when taking the case to trial with a public defender.
youtube
Unfortunately, a lot of attorneys are simply interested in their own pay day so they recommend their clients to go to trial and they tell them what they want to hear just so they would keep paying them and so they could get more money. One of the biggest determining factors is whether or not the person was asleep in their vehicle while they were parked on the side of the road or parked in a parking lot. One of the defenses against DUI charges is the Shelter Rule defense and this would apply if someone was in a parking lot and they were asleep. This rule basically says that as a society, we want to encourage people who are too drunk to be driving to pull over to the side of the road or pull into a parking lot and sleep off the affects of alcohol or find another way home. Unfortunately, officers are still looking for that type of scenario and they are arresting people and charging them with DUIs. Sometimes the cases that really should be dismissed are the ones that end up being more likely to go to trial because as an attorney I simply cannot recommend for my client to take a plea agreement to something they did not do. It would always be up to the client whether or not they wanted to take a plea agreement even if I had advised them it would be in their best interest to go to trial.
Realistically, the client could decide whatever reason they wanted to go to trial. The client would not have to explain their reasoning for why they wanted to go to trial, because it would be their constitutional right to go to trial. I would only be able to advise them with respect to my thoughts about them going to trial and what their options would be so they could make a fully informed decision on how they wanted to proceed. It would be perfectly fine if they wanted to go to trial and it would be perfectly fine if they wanted to take a plea agreement. DUI trials are expensive. You have at least one or two days in court and you have a lot of preparation time to get ready for a trial. Sometimes, you have the cost of an expert witness, if you need it. So it can be in the thousands of dollars for the cost of the trial. If you really want to do it and do it right. But like you mentioned, you have to weigh that with the risk of having a conviction. If you have some pretty good defenses and good explanations and you have a strong case, then it is worth it to spend the money to go to trial because the long term ramifications of a DUI conviction; the jail time, the possible loss of the license, can far outweigh the cost of the trial. There are statistics out there and analysis of the costs of a DUI and a DUI conviction. When you are talking rental cars and increased insurance, lost job opportunities, The cost can range anywhere up to $200,000, the possible long term ramifications of a DUI conviction. So if you can spend $5,000 to $10,000 on a trial for a DUI and get an acquittal, if you have some strong defenses, then it is well worth proceeding this way.
youtube
One of the most important things that clients must know is the trial process, one is, they are giving control of the outcome of the case to someone else. If they are going to trial, they are letting a judge or juries determine the outcome of the case versus they are making the decision on a plea deal. And I think the second most important thing that I try to explain to them is the jury itself. They are given instructions to follow the law and weigh the evidence and to not make a decision until they have heard all of the evidence and there are a lot of things that go on in that jury room. But ultimately, you just never know and it is tough for members of juries, because in a small group like that, you have someone who is going to emerge as a leader. Sometimes that leader will tend to sway the others, a kind of pack mentality.
Whereas if you have a jury of eight or more people, you might have two pack leaders. You might have a pack leader for not guilty and you might have a pack leader for guilty. It would be tougher to get the whole jury to go guilty if you have a pack leader that is arguing for not guilty. Whereas if there are just four people and you have a pack leader of guilty, then the odds are greater, that there could be more guilty verdicts. It is just tougher. I am saying that with the four member jury, I believe the jury trials are tougher just because there are fewer people that have to make a decision, and in the smaller groups, people might be easier to sway one way or the other. I guess the vital thing would be is even though the jury was instructed to follow the law and not make a decision until they have heard everything, sometimes that they might not do that. They might have a certain feeling or a certain bias about maybe the way you look or if you did not testify, they might hold that against you and so it can be a big risk. So they need to know those things. Sometimes there should not be, but sometimes there is a distinction. When you are talking about representing, the attorney is there for them, the attorney might be dealing the very minimum, making sure just a brief overlook of the facts and moving on and looking for the best possible plea deal, or there is zealously advocating for your client where you do not leave any stone unturned so to speak. Even where you are not just taking a cursory look at the police report, you are going further, you are investigating the officer and you are looking at the blood test results. You are pulling information from the lab and the lab analyst and going over their training and qualifications; or the breath test machine.
youtube
You are not just relying on the test result; you are pulling the maintenance certificates and the calibration records and seeing if there have been any problems with the machine. There is a difference there. Most DUI attorneys, they understand and they understand that to get a good outcome, they have to zealously advocate, they have to go and dig deeper into the case than just being there to represent someone. In almost every case, unless there are technical issues, we prefer a jury instead of just appearing in front of a judge. The reason being, the odds are better going in front of twelve of your peers versus going in front of a judge in order to obtain a not guilty verdict. In regards to how many cases go to trial, it depends on what attorney we are referring to. Typically about two percent of cases end up going to a jury trial. For some attorneys, it can go either way; it just depends on the cases. There might be times where ten percent or more of these cases will go to trial. But typically, the case that is going to trial is going to be the one where this is the wishes of the client. The client always has the right to go to a jury trial, and a typical trial case would be one where the chances of winning far out way the other.
Generally, most criminal defense attorneys are good lawyers who fight their DUI cases. There are some out there that never go to a jury trial. All they do is pleading their clients guilty, every time. Some of the criteria when considering a trial in defending a DUI case is what is the strength of the case the risk and the potential penalties. In many cases when a deal is offered, they will lose a trial. The penalties are not going to be that much different. In that case, you can afford it. If you have the time, go to trial, it is recommended. But there are a number of counties and cases where if you do go to trial, you are looking at a penalty that is much worse than if you do not. You want to make sure in those cases that you have a chance to win and that you can handle the consequences if you are found guilty. In a DUI case, for a first offense without any extra allegations, the maximum penalty is six months in jail, which means the worst that you would do if convicted is three months in jail. In most cases, the judge is not going to offer that light of a sentence. Most attorneys should be able to look at the possible penalties involved and then balance that with your chances of winning. We then start looking at all the different offenses involved, and we focus on a handful of defenses that we think will get the jury trial to come to a not guilty verdict. Worst case scenario is a hung jury and hopefully the DA will not refile and then case is over.
Different types of defenses that we look at are the elements of the offense. For example, drunk driving, you have to be driving, so we want to look at whether or not the officer saw you driving, whether the DA’s office can prove you were driving and was there a witness who saw you drive and called it in. The other issues are where you impaired when you were driving, or were you at or over a 0.08% blood alcohol level when you were driving. We would look at the field sobriety tests and other aspects of the case, the investigation that the officer did, video and audio reports of the actual driving, conversations, and then there are the chemical test results; which are the breath or blood testing and what procedures were utilized to administer them. Was there any margins in errors with the testing, issues with the machines or can they prove beyond a reasonable doubt that you were out or over a 0.08% BAC level and was the machine acting properly, working properly and were there issues with the blood test, was there some type of contamination and were there mycobacterium that could cause a false positive on a blood test. There are many different defenses, but in most cases, there is only one or a handful that might work. There are some attorneys who will avoid going to trial and almost always plead their clients guilty. These are also usually the same lawyers that quote shockingly low legal fees. Any individual who is charged with a DUI and consults with a potential lawyer should ask that attorney how many DUI bench or jury trials have they done in the last few years they have been practicing law.
youtube
It is surprising to most people how many DUI lawyers literally do not take cases in to trial. For me, taking a case to trial is one of the most enjoyable and rewarding parts of my job, because it is the culmination of all my studying, training, and experience. Not every DUI should go to trial, but I investigate, research, and prepare every case as if we are going to trial. The reason we take a case to trial is because, based on my review of the facts and law, I think I can produce a not guilty verdict in the case. The second reason is if we run out of options and our backs are against the wall, which is a pretty rare occurrence, but it does happen from time to time. If I evaluate a case and notice the facts and laws are on our side, I will recommend going to trial to my client and in the long run it is usually favorable. The decision to go to trial is sometimes difficult because the evidence is not as cut and dry or black and white as you would think. The evidence is frequently on the fence. A case could be dismissed if it was determined that there was no probable cause to make that traffic stop. A case can be dismissed if there was no probable cause to arrest them for a DUI. DUI cases can take years to go to trial. When a case does go to trial, the typical time is somewhere between six months and a year and a half. That is pretty standard because it takes a long time. Often motions happen before the trial. If you are released from jail and you are not in custody, you have a Constitutional right to a jury trial within 45 days of your arraignment. That is your first court date.
DUI Defense Attorneys Free Consultation
When you need legal help to defend against DUI Charges in Utah, please call Ascent Law LLC for your free consultation (801) 676-5506. We want to help you.
Ascent Law LLC 8833 S. Redwood Road, Suite C West Jordan, Utah 84088 United States Telephone: (801) 676-5506
Ascent Law LLC
4.9 stars – based on 67 reviews
Recent Posts
Utah Injury Lawyer
Family Law In UT
Bankruptcy And Foreclosure
Disposing Property After Divorce
Divorce Can Make Good People Bad
Post Foreclosure Liability For Code Violations
from Michael Anderson https://www.ascentlawfirm.com/should-i-go-to-trial-for-dui/ from Divorce Lawyer Nelson Farms Utah https://divorcelawyernelsonfarmsutah.tumblr.com/post/619989240674172928
0 notes
coming-from-hell · 4 years ago
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Should I Go To Trial For DUI?
Percentage wise, very few cases actually go to trial because it would be a matter of having a good enough legal or factual issue to actually take the case to trial, along with actually having the funds to do that. Probably, somewhere around 1 or 2% of cases actually make their way to trial, whereas the vast majority of cases end up in a plea agreement with another small percentage ending in the dismissal of the case in full. Sometimes, there really would not be any risk involved in taking the case to trial but it would just be a matter of the financial aspect where it would often not necessarily be worth it for someone to pay thousands of dollars extra to take the case all the way to trial if there wasn’t a good likelihood they would win. The public defender would probably end up going to trial more often than a private attorney simply because there would be no additional funds required when taking the case to trial with a public defender.
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Unfortunately, a lot of attorneys are simply interested in their own pay day so they recommend their clients to go to trial and they tell them what they want to hear just so they would keep paying them and so they could get more money. One of the biggest determining factors is whether or not the person was asleep in their vehicle while they were parked on the side of the road or parked in a parking lot. One of the defenses against DUI charges is the Shelter Rule defense and this would apply if someone was in a parking lot and they were asleep. This rule basically says that as a society, we want to encourage people who are too drunk to be driving to pull over to the side of the road or pull into a parking lot and sleep off the affects of alcohol or find another way home. Unfortunately, officers are still looking for that type of scenario and they are arresting people and charging them with DUIs. Sometimes the cases that really should be dismissed are the ones that end up being more likely to go to trial because as an attorney I simply cannot recommend for my client to take a plea agreement to something they did not do. It would always be up to the client whether or not they wanted to take a plea agreement even if I had advised them it would be in their best interest to go to trial.
Realistically, the client could decide whatever reason they wanted to go to trial. The client would not have to explain their reasoning for why they wanted to go to trial, because it would be their constitutional right to go to trial. I would only be able to advise them with respect to my thoughts about them going to trial and what their options would be so they could make a fully informed decision on how they wanted to proceed. It would be perfectly fine if they wanted to go to trial and it would be perfectly fine if they wanted to take a plea agreement. DUI trials are expensive. You have at least one or two days in court and you have a lot of preparation time to get ready for a trial. Sometimes, you have the cost of an expert witness, if you need it. So it can be in the thousands of dollars for the cost of the trial. If you really want to do it and do it right. But like you mentioned, you have to weigh that with the risk of having a conviction. If you have some pretty good defenses and good explanations and you have a strong case, then it is worth it to spend the money to go to trial because the long term ramifications of a DUI conviction; the jail time, the possible loss of the license, can far outweigh the cost of the trial. There are statistics out there and analysis of the costs of a DUI and a DUI conviction. When you are talking rental cars and increased insurance, lost job opportunities, The cost can range anywhere up to $200,000, the possible long term ramifications of a DUI conviction. So if you can spend $5,000 to $10,000 on a trial for a DUI and get an acquittal, if you have some strong defenses, then it is well worth proceeding this way.
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One of the most important things that clients must know is the trial process, one is, they are giving control of the outcome of the case to someone else. If they are going to trial, they are letting a judge or juries determine the outcome of the case versus they are making the decision on a plea deal. And I think the second most important thing that I try to explain to them is the jury itself. They are given instructions to follow the law and weigh the evidence and to not make a decision until they have heard all of the evidence and there are a lot of things that go on in that jury room. But ultimately, you just never know and it is tough for members of juries, because in a small group like that, you have someone who is going to emerge as a leader. Sometimes that leader will tend to sway the others, a kind of pack mentality.
Whereas if you have a jury of eight or more people, you might have two pack leaders. You might have a pack leader for not guilty and you might have a pack leader for guilty. It would be tougher to get the whole jury to go guilty if you have a pack leader that is arguing for not guilty. Whereas if there are just four people and you have a pack leader of guilty, then the odds are greater, that there could be more guilty verdicts. It is just tougher. I am saying that with the four member jury, I believe the jury trials are tougher just because there are fewer people that have to make a decision, and in the smaller groups, people might be easier to sway one way or the other. I guess the vital thing would be is even though the jury was instructed to follow the law and not make a decision until they have heard everything, sometimes that they might not do that. They might have a certain feeling or a certain bias about maybe the way you look or if you did not testify, they might hold that against you and so it can be a big risk. So they need to know those things. Sometimes there should not be, but sometimes there is a distinction. When you are talking about representing, the attorney is there for them, the attorney might be dealing the very minimum, making sure just a brief overlook of the facts and moving on and looking for the best possible plea deal, or there is zealously advocating for your client where you do not leave any stone unturned so to speak. Even where you are not just taking a cursory look at the police report, you are going further, you are investigating the officer and you are looking at the blood test results. You are pulling information from the lab and the lab analyst and going over their training and qualifications; or the breath test machine.
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You are not just relying on the test result; you are pulling the maintenance certificates and the calibration records and seeing if there have been any problems with the machine. There is a difference there. Most DUI attorneys, they understand and they understand that to get a good outcome, they have to zealously advocate, they have to go and dig deeper into the case than just being there to represent someone. In almost every case, unless there are technical issues, we prefer a jury instead of just appearing in front of a judge. The reason being, the odds are better going in front of twelve of your peers versus going in front of a judge in order to obtain a not guilty verdict. In regards to how many cases go to trial, it depends on what attorney we are referring to. Typically about two percent of cases end up going to a jury trial. For some attorneys, it can go either way; it just depends on the cases. There might be times where ten percent or more of these cases will go to trial. But typically, the case that is going to trial is going to be the one where this is the wishes of the client. The client always has the right to go to a jury trial, and a typical trial case would be one where the chances of winning far out way the other.
Generally, most criminal defense attorneys are good lawyers who fight their DUI cases. There are some out there that never go to a jury trial. All they do is pleading their clients guilty, every time. Some of the criteria when considering a trial in defending a DUI case is what is the strength of the case the risk and the potential penalties. In many cases when a deal is offered, they will lose a trial. The penalties are not going to be that much different. In that case, you can afford it. If you have the time, go to trial, it is recommended. But there are a number of counties and cases where if you do go to trial, you are looking at a penalty that is much worse than if you do not. You want to make sure in those cases that you have a chance to win and that you can handle the consequences if you are found guilty. In a DUI case, for a first offense without any extra allegations, the maximum penalty is six months in jail, which means the worst that you would do if convicted is three months in jail. In most cases, the judge is not going to offer that light of a sentence. Most attorneys should be able to look at the possible penalties involved and then balance that with your chances of winning. We then start looking at all the different offenses involved, and we focus on a handful of defenses that we think will get the jury trial to come to a not guilty verdict. Worst case scenario is a hung jury and hopefully the DA will not refile and then case is over.
Different types of defenses that we look at are the elements of the offense. For example, drunk driving, you have to be driving, so we want to look at whether or not the officer saw you driving, whether the DA’s office can prove you were driving and was there a witness who saw you drive and called it in. The other issues are where you impaired when you were driving, or were you at or over a 0.08% blood alcohol level when you were driving. We would look at the field sobriety tests and other aspects of the case, the investigation that the officer did, video and audio reports of the actual driving, conversations, and then there are the chemical test results; which are the breath or blood testing and what procedures were utilized to administer them. Was there any margins in errors with the testing, issues with the machines or can they prove beyond a reasonable doubt that you were out or over a 0.08% BAC level and was the machine acting properly, working properly and were there issues with the blood test, was there some type of contamination and were there mycobacterium that could cause a false positive on a blood test. There are many different defenses, but in most cases, there is only one or a handful that might work. There are some attorneys who will avoid going to trial and almost always plead their clients guilty. These are also usually the same lawyers that quote shockingly low legal fees. Any individual who is charged with a DUI and consults with a potential lawyer should ask that attorney how many DUI bench or jury trials have they done in the last few years they have been practicing law.
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It is surprising to most people how many DUI lawyers literally do not take cases in to trial. For me, taking a case to trial is one of the most enjoyable and rewarding parts of my job, because it is the culmination of all my studying, training, and experience. Not every DUI should go to trial, but I investigate, research, and prepare every case as if we are going to trial. The reason we take a case to trial is because, based on my review of the facts and law, I think I can produce a not guilty verdict in the case. The second reason is if we run out of options and our backs are against the wall, which is a pretty rare occurrence, but it does happen from time to time. If I evaluate a case and notice the facts and laws are on our side, I will recommend going to trial to my client and in the long run it is usually favorable. The decision to go to trial is sometimes difficult because the evidence is not as cut and dry or black and white as you would think. The evidence is frequently on the fence. A case could be dismissed if it was determined that there was no probable cause to make that traffic stop. A case can be dismissed if there was no probable cause to arrest them for a DUI. DUI cases can take years to go to trial. When a case does go to trial, the typical time is somewhere between six months and a year and a half. That is pretty standard because it takes a long time. Often motions happen before the trial. If you are released from jail and you are not in custody, you have a Constitutional right to a jury trial within 45 days of your arraignment. That is your first court date.
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