#we canr have a dinner

[muxas-world]

Is all gone now only the bittersweet stays ..

[sydmarch]

OK I hope my readmore on mobile works. SPOILERS FOR INFINITY PIOL OBVIOUSLY these are just my post initial watch word vomit thoughts.

OK SO FIRST off god the arsthetic. obsessed. he has such an eye for framing. definitely felt extremely similar vibes to possessor with all the saturated blues & the cameras flipping upside down & the doubling scene. definitely similar vibes to the Vos possession scene. & huge similarities with the sex scenes too but that sex scene was ABSOLUTELY FUCKING INSANE???

& god there's nothing like those moments where you get to be like I FUCKING KNEW IT!! he didn't lose his passport. the execution was from the doubles perspective this time around. he was never really one of them. it was a double not the detective under the sheet. kind of insane that it never came up that he couldn't afford more doubling on his own I was SO expecting at some point for it to come up that without em he couldn't afford it.

the fucking. commodification of violence. what are you willing to be complicit in if you can convince yourself what your hands are clean. the identity and personhood. how DO you know its the right one. like was the James who lived ti the end even the original James? it's possible that the dog was the original. he didn't know they had made a other double. they could've been switched out anytime.

& the way that all the "zombies" were so just. NORMAL at the end. compartmentalized everything. like their vacation selves are another kind of double. & how James is just not able to do that ig? even in the end after killing his double he's still not like them and never was. canr move on & go back to normal. at least that's the interpretation I came away with on an initial watch. I'll definitely jave to watch it more times to REALLY dig into it like with all of Brandon's stuff there's sooooo much going on its hard to get it all on one go.

& ok two small things that were just CRAZY to me. the scene w the pee splashing on the ground and then the cum on the ground. BONKERS!! & that fucking weird thing with the nipple during the hallucination coming back around with the bloody breastfeeding near the end. INSANE!!!

& probably a topic I'll dive into more another time but god I am thinking so much about the similarities between Syd & Vos & James. the way Brandon's protagonist are all these like. perpetual outsiders. these people who are just like INCAPABLE of being on the inside maybe not from the start in every case but by the end absolutely. the like. corruption arcs. all 3 of them get worse.

and on a less serious note James absolute candidate for new most pathetic man on earth. Jesus christ. even though I knew what was coming when she was like bring out the dog. Jesus fucking christ.

absolutely have to go see it again. one of the movies of all time. you crazy boatyard LOL I MEANT CRAZY BASTARD rereading whatbi wrote on the train without my glasses on god. you've done it again. my god I can't believe the scene where we we're watching the whole group getting executed and it pans over and we see them in the audience people in the theater were LAUGHING? one thing I think I learned from seeing crimes of the future in theaters 4 or was it 5 times. is that people are uncomfortable with their discomfort. because there was NOTHING funny about that scene it was fucking HARROWING!! that they could witness somwthing like that as if it was like. dinner theater.

the choice to open that scene on the doubles chatting & being dragged out as if they were the originals was just brilliant BRILLIANT GENIUS I CANT GET OVER IT like showing us what it's like from the other side which it seems like they just so easily dismiss. to the doubles it IS like they're the originals just being dragged to their deaths. so fucking crazy one of the best scenes absolutely.

ok I thibk that's all I've got for the moment but god. wow.

[fictionalrat]

let it happen | chapter two

pairing: klance

sneak a peek:

“Lance, don’t freak out, but…” Keith adjusts his glasses, “I might have an idea.”

Lance huffs, “Don’t strain yourself.”

Keith scowls, “Shut up and hear me out, asshole.”

“Okay,” Lance leans back on his chair and crosses his arms, “I’ll bite.”

“I think we should…” Keith snaps the rubber band on his wrist, “Uhm, fuck?”

read on ao3

“Lance?” He hears when he clicks the door shut with his foot. He whips his head around to find Keith at the dinner table hugging his right leg to his chest, foot on the chair and knee tucked under his chin. He’s frowning deeply at his laptop screen like it’s offending him in some way, his glasses perched on the edge of his nose. Keith looks so damn adorable Lance’s heart almost leaps out of his chest. Fucked, Lance’s fucked.

“Yep, that’s me,” Lance responds, throwing his keys on the kitchen island and kicking off his shoes.

Keith peers up at him over the rim of his glasses. “Come here for a sec,” he nudges the chair next to him with his bare foot. Lance stares at Keith. Hm, weird. Keith narrows his eyes when he doesn’t move. Oh. Right, moving. Yep, on it. He pads towards his friend.

Lance smiles at Keith, hip-checking the table and reaching his arm forward to adjust the shorter man’s glasses with his knuckles gently, “You need to get these fixed, shorty.”

Keith bats his hand away and scowls, “Sit.”

Lance chuckles but acquiesces, “Seriously, it’s too loose.” As if on cue, Keith’s glasses slide down his nose again. Lance snorts, “Told you.”

Keith socks him on the arm, hard, “Shut up.”

“Ow, so mean!” Lance pouts as he rubs his arm, “What do you want from me, anyway?”

Keith adjusts himself on the chair, tucking his left foot under his right thigh, and turns his laptop towards Lance so he can see his own words staring back at him. “This won’t do,” Keith says seriously as he pushes his glasses back with his middle finger.

Lance drums his fingers on the table. “What?”

“Lance, this isn’t working.”

Lance’s fingers freeze, his brows rising, “What do you mean this isn’t working??”

“I mean…” he deadpans, “I can’t edit this, it’s total bullshit. There’s no hope.”

Lance bristles, “ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME, KEITH????”

Keith snickers, “Maybe a little?”

Lance throws his head back and glares in exasperation at the ceiling, bringing his hands up to cover his face and groaning, “God, please, take me now.” After a moment, he lets his hands fall back on the table. “You know,” he starts, turning his head back so he can glower at Keith properly, “If you weren’t so good at editing and I wasn’t so desperate, I wouldn’t even think of asking you to do this for me, ‘cause you’re a serious fucking prickly pain in my fucking miserable ass.”

Keith smirks and shrugs, “Thanks.”

Lance splutters, “THAT WASN’T A COMPLIMENT.”

Keith doesn’t respond, though, he just stares at Lance in a weird way. A very, very weird way.

Lance touches his face, self-conscious, “Is there something on my-”

“Huh,” Keith blurts out, interrupting Lance.

“Keith?” Lance questions with a frown, worrying for his friend’s sanity.

“Sorry,” Keith blinks at him and blushes.

Lance squints, “Dude, what the fuck.”

“Lance, don’t freak out, but…” Keith adjusts his glasses, “I might have an idea.”

Lance huffs, “Don’t strain yourself.”

Keith scowls, “Shut up and hear me out, asshole.”

“Okay,” Lance leans back on his chair and crosses his arms, “I’ll bite.”

“I think we should…” Keith snaps the rubber band on his wrist, “Uhm, fuck?”

Lance chokes on his own spit and coughs so hard his chair almost topples over.

“Are you okay, Lance?” Keith asks, his voice concerned but amused.

“Fuck?” Lance croaks after some time, slapping his chest and blinking away tears.

“Yeah,” Keith’s mouth twitches. “For research, obviously.”

Lance can only gape at Keith, his chest heaving. Lance’s lungs are burning so, so bad.

“Look, I’ll be straight with you,“ Keith runs his fingers through his FUGLY mullet, “your writing style’s actually pretty decent. You’re eloquent, I’ll give you that. But you suck at writing sex scenes… maybe from lack of experience?” Keith teases, then winces when Lance kicks his shin under the table.

Is this guy for fucking serious? They should fuck? What kind of joke is this?

“No, but seriously.” Keith insists, “Even though the sex scenes are well-written, they lack passion, which is kind of a surprise coming from you. You clearly need some inspiration and I think being actually in character might really help, is all.”

“AND BY THAT YOU MEAN THE TWO OF US FUCKING???”

Keith bites his bottom lip in amusement and nods. He doesn’t tease, which is a first. Lance is thankful but still.

“OH MY GOD!!!!!!!!!!!!!” Lance yells in disbelief, then takes a deep, recomposing breath. “Okay. So uh, let me get this straight… you think we should fuck this one out?”

Keith shrugs again, “I mean, if you want to.”

“Huh.” Lance’s mouth twitches, “That’s crazy but okay.”

“What?”

Lance rolls his eyes and waves him off, “I said fine, Keith. Let’s do this.”

Keith smirks, turning his attention back to his laptop. Lance stares at the side of his face then chuckles. “Gotta say, though,” Lance leers, “I didn’t know you wanted to fuck me this bad, mullet head.”

“SHUT UP!” Keith pushes Lance off his chair.

Lance can’t fucking sleep.

He tries playing dead for a while and when that doesn’t work, he settles upon changing positions back and forth.

He kicks off the sheets in frustration, takes his shirt off, turns to his side, rolls on his stomach, burrows his face into his pillow. Props himself up on his elbows and huffs, lies back down. Flips his pillow over and presses his face to the cool fabric.

It doesn’t work.

He rolls on his back and lets his eyes dart around the room as he taps his chest with his thumbs, chewing on his bottom lip.

Nothing fucking works.

He blinks up at the ceiling and blows a raspberry.

“i think we should… uhm, fuck?” he mimics under his breath.

Fucking Keith.

God, he can’t do this.

He reaches for his phone on his nightstand and brings the device closer to his face, adjusting himself on the bed. He unlocks the phone and almost drops it right on his face in agony because, wow, such brightness. He turns down the brightness on his screen and blinks several times before tapping open his messages with Hunk.

He starts typing furiously.

Lance (2:06 a.m.)

HUNK U UP

HUNK HUNK

HUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNKKKK

HELP

Hunk (2:08 a.m.)

why hello lance my good buddy how are you?

i’m fine thanks for asking ure so kind

what can i do for you this alarmingly late???

Lance (2:10 a.m.)

I CANR SLEEP HUNK HELP

HEPL ME

IM GONNA DIE

KEITHS A SERIAL KILLER AND HES COMING AFTER ME WITH HIS DICK

KEITHS GONNA KILL ME WITH HIS DICKKKKKKKKK

Hunk (2:13 a.m.)

i think ure overreacting a bit lance

calm down and explain this to me like a normal human being

breathe in

breathe out

Lance (2:14 a.m.)

ICANT HUNK H

U

N

K

WHAT AM I DOING WITH MY LIFEEEEEEEEEEEE

Hunk (2:17 a.m.)

i still need an explanation

please cUT THE DRAMATICS

IM GETTING REAL WORRIED HERE AND YOU KNOW WHAT WORRYING DOES TO MY STOMACH!!!!!!!

ITS NOT PRETTY LANCE SO SPILL

Lance (2:18 a.m.)

EW GROSS

but okay

so

fucking keith came up with this fucking INSANE idea that we should FUCK

HE SAID WE SHOULD FUCK HUNK cuz my sex scenes were like AWFUL and he thought that was a brilliant idea HE SAID I LACK EXPERIENCE THE ASSHOLE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! CAN U BELIEVE THE NERVE????? and i went with it cuz i HAVE THE MORAL DUTY to prove him wrong and now im gonna die

okay get this

this is the weirdest part

its not only cuz i gotta prove him wrong but cuz i kinda wanna fuck the bastard for my own self-indulging and impure reasons

Hunk (2:23 a.m.)

lance not even rover thinks thats weird and hes a DOG

Lance (2:24 a.m.)

IMHYPERVENTILATING HERE AND URE MAKING FUN OF ME

URE A TERRIBLE BEST FRIEND

TERRIBLE I TELL U

IM HAVING A CRISIS HERE HUNK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

OH MY GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOD

HES SO HOT HUNK HELP ME I CANT DO THIS

IM GONNA DIE

RIP LANCE

Hunk (2:26 a.m.)

lance youre not gonna die

jesus

i thought this was serious

Lance (2:27 a.m.)

GASP

it IS SERIOUS HUNK CANT U SEE IM A DEAD MAN WALKING?????? THIS IS PRETTYFUCKIGN SERIOUs HUNK

at first i thought i could do it but then i started thinking about it and now IM FREAKING THE FUCK OUT HELP HUNK AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

Hunk (2:29 a.m.)

calm down lance its just keith

its not like he’s gonna make fun of you or anything

Lance (2:30 a.m.)

HUNK???????? DID U HIT UR HEAD OR SOMETHING???? SHOULD I BE WORRIED????? CALL AN AMBULANCE??????? ITS FUCKING KEITH WERE TALKING ABOUT DUDE!!!! MISTER MCMULLET CAPTAIN GRUMPY PANTS!!!!!!!

Hunk (2:33 a.m.)

well i mean not too much???

Lance (2:33 a.m.)

hUNK!!!!!!!

Hunk (2:34 a.m.)

okay you got me

youre never gonna live this down good luck man

it was nice knowing you

Lance (2:35 a.m.)

well thanks

for ABSOLUTELY NOTHING

Hunk (2:35 a.m.)

you know i love you bro

seriously tho

you dont have to worry about this too much

keiths your friend after all isnt he

not to mention hes a cool bean, a real gem

do you trust him?

Lance (2:36 a.m.)

well duh i wouldnt be living with the guy if i didnt

Hunk (2:39 a.m.)

there it is

he knows all about your weird fixations and habits and is still there

thats gotta count for something right???

its not like hes gonna judge for real

hes just gonna tease the hell outta you which is normal behavior for him

and youll tease him right back

so DONT WORRY LANCE GO

BE BRAVE MY CHILD

CONQUER THAT BOOTY!!!!!!!

COMPLETE YOUR QUEST!!!!!!!!!

Lance (2:42 a.m.)

ohmy GOD hunk ure so embarrassing

thanks tho

for real

Hunk (2:42 a.m.)

anytime ;)

Lance (2:43 a.m.)

Lance sighs, turns on his side only to place his phone back on his nightstand, then rolls on his stomach, burying his face deep in his pillow. He closes his eyes and wills himself to fucking sleep.

About thirty minutes later, he’s out.

[365daysofmarysa]

that song came on at work today

you know the one

its really well known but i dont like to think of it like that

i think of it as our song

the one we played after we shotgunned the "big" beers and ran around that little swiss town

breathing in the mountain air, searching for that lion head statue

the one you asked ryan to play, we all screamed out all the words

that was five years ago but it couldve been yesterday, i replay that memory so much

we went off by ourselves at one point and oh my god i knew that you knew that night

we joked with everyone about jumping off that bridge, and everyone else laughed but you and me both knew there was more truth to it than anything else

fuck man i miss you

and im sorry

and i wish you would've let me in

i know you tried to

i missed my shot because i was too worried about protecting myself

god i miss you

i wish you were here, still breathing, still warm, still you

still yelling at ryan to play the killers on repeat

fuck man

theres not a day i dont wish i could fucking take your place

tag you back into the world and let me out

i just love you so much

you have so much more to give

fuck

and i dont have anything more to give

fuck

i miss you so fucking much

i love you so fucking much

why the fuck does this keep happening

why to us

why i dont fucking indersyand

this doesnt make sense

and i canr fuckinh breathe anymore FUCK

this is so fucking cruel

yhis is so fucking heartless

and why does no one fucking talk about it

why did you have to hide in the dark corner why did i

i remember the day i tried to kill myself and then i had to fucking get on with my day after

i went out for fucking dinner at school after

and i had to excuse myself from it so i ciuld go hide in the fuxking staircase and tru to

breathe for four hours

fuck

why am i back here

why were you there

why cqnt i seperate anything

why cant my pills make

me all better

why fant i force myself to take them anymore

why fid they let this happen to YOU

i fucking miss you jason fuck i font fucking understand But i totally fucking understand

this i s garbage why does nothing make sense why arent thungs just rught and good and nott fucking chaotic why am i losing my fucking mind again holy fuck

i miss uou

and i hate that fucking song because it always reminds me

and i hTe my fucking self becauee i always remember

and i lov eyou i dint know why the world let you go

or how

because my grip is still

so

string mh knickles wjite

from

holding on how the fuck could anyone let you go

thi s was supposed to be pretty and a memory and make you come back but it just makes me want to slit mh wrisys all over again

fuck i miss hiu

i hope its better this way because if its not then its a big fuckinh wasye and j dint understand