#we are going to ignore tik hanging at the top of the page

[peanutrat20]

guess who is making art for a fic they haven't read yet

the neon void is bay @sugarpasteltmnt

and i have heard it's good but i have yet to read it so i have yet to form an opinion on it. i do have an ao3 tab with the fic open in it

this guy just spoke to me and i decided i had to draw him, i have no idea how close to his actual design i have gotten i just kinda looked at other art to get a general idea then went from there

also it was a good excuse to use my neon pens again

[haikyuuthots]

Hi! I really enjoyed that TikTok hcs you just posted so I was wondering if I could request some for Ushijima, Suna, and Iwaizumi about that TikTok challenge where the boys are doing something (playing video games or studying) and the girl is trying to cuddle them? Plus some cuddling hcs if you don't mind. Thank you very much and I hope you have a good day!

Clinging onto your boyfriend while he’s distracted (Tik Tok challenge)

Characters: Wakatoshi Ushijima, Rintaro Suna and Hajime Iwaizumi

Scenario: your boyfriend is busy but you distract them by clinging on to their lap to see how he’d react.

A/n: hi thank u so much for requesting!!! 💙 these tik tok challenges have been my favorite to write haha. I hope you enjoy reading ❤️

————————————————————————

Wakatoshi Ushijima

You’re hanging out in your boyfriends room while he finishes studying for an upcoming exam

You’re scrolling on Tik Tok when you stumble on a video of a girl trying her best to get her distracted boyfriend’s attention

As you watch you slightly laugh, thinking this is the cutest thing you’ve ever seen

your attention is caught when you hear your boyfriend sneeze,

Looking over you smile to yourself and think you want to try what you just saw on the video, but with your own boyfriend who was indeed distracted right now

At first you’re reluctant to try, because you don’t want to bother him while he studies

But then you remember that Toshi is a big softie for you, so the worst that could happen is he just asks you to leave him alone lol

Putting your phone down you make it over to your boyfriends desk

You shyly stand beside him for a moment before he notices you

Turning around to look towards you, Ushijima gives you a soft smile, “hi love, is everything okay?”

You nod your head as Ushijima pulls you closer to him so you’re now standing in between his legs.

“Yes, Im just bored.” You reply

“Im almost done babe, give me like an hour. ”

As he turns around to start working again you begin to adjust yourself on his lap

A bit confused he lets out a small chuckle

You still say no words as you continue to wrap your body against his, nuzzling your face into his neck

Ushijima doesn’t say anything, instead he takes in your embrace and lightly begins to caress the top of your head

He lets you remain on his lap for a moment, but you're happy enough with his reaction and decide not to bother him any further

You try getting off his lap but as you do Ushijima’s hold on you tightens, preventing you from moving

“where are you going?” He asks you with the most loving expression

Your eyes soften at his gaze, “i don't want to distract you, so i'll just wait until you're done.”

With no warning Ushijima stands up, still holding you, he’s now carrying you towards his bed

“i can take a break.” He says as he gently begins to adjust your bodies on the bed

Now laying down you snuggle further into your boyfriends arms, whom happily reciprocates with a warm embrace

theres a brief silence while you two cuddle for a moment, until you break it

“im sorry I distracted you Toshi.”

“dont be. I missed you too.” He responds, kissing you softly on the forehead

You smile brightly at his response leaning forward to leave a small kiss on his lips

He gladly reciprocates, smiling into the kiss.

You guys spend the next two hours wrapped in each others warmth.

Rintaro Suna

You spent the whole day with your boyfriend Suna, running errands

Upon arriving home, Suna made his way over to his Playstation, quickly turning on the game

You subtly roll your eyes, not truly bothered because honestly at this point you were used to Suna playing his video games

You make your way over to the living room and start watching Tik Toks on your phone

You watch a video where the girlfriend sat on her boyfriends lap while he was gaming , and the reaction was very funny to you

After watching the video, you wondered how your boyfriend would react if you did the same thing

So you decided to try it out yourself

Walking back in the room you can hear your boyfriend talking to his friends through the mic,

You quickly make your way over to your boyfriend and begin to crawl into his lap

Suna is caught very off guard and begins to freak out because your body was in the way of the screen and he couldn’t see

“woah woah babe, hold up I cant see.”

You ignore him and chuckle to yourself continuing to wrap your body around his

Once you’re seated on his lap he doesn’t mind your presence at all.

He actually liked having you on him while he played

Every time he ended a match he looked towards you and kissed you softly on the lips

Although you were enjoying being in the arms of your boyfriend you were starting to get bored, and wanted to get off

So once again you shift to begin to stand up,

“wait. Stay.” Suna says, his gaze still on the tv

You let out a small laugh, “baby I’m bored, I’m gonna go watch a movie or something.”

Suna removes his gaze from the tv for a split second, only to look at you with soft eyes, “im almost done, this is the last match, I promise.”

You totally give in in his request and give him a small kiss on the cheek, as a form of saying you agree

After the game is over, Suna says his goodbyes and turns off the console

Looking over to you, still sitting in his lap, he can help but stare in awe

“im surprised you wanted to be with me while I gamed. You never do.”

“i love being with you Rin.” You chuckle out

Quickly his grip around you tightens and he leans in to give you a long kiss, you reciprocate right away

Pulling away he speaks again “”okay so lets go watch that movie you want to watch.”

Your face brightens with a smile and you quickly get up to get everything ready

Now you’re happily cuddled in your boyfriends arms, watching your favorite movie

Although you know he’s not paying much attention (you can tell by the fact he’s kissing you every 5 minutes lol) this is your favorite position to be in

Your legs tangled with eahother and your face briefly on the nape of his neck, you wouldn’t want it any other way

Hajime Iwaizumi

Iwaizumi was busy looking over some notes that were important for his next game

Any time he’d be occupied you never distracted him, you weren’t really a clingy girlfriend

So when you saw that there was a trend going around where the girlfriend clings on their boyfriend while he was busy

You thought it’d be amusing to see how your boyfriend would react

You look over to where your boyfriend is sitting and notice he’s peacefully flipping through pages

Walking over to his desk Iwaizumi immediately notices your presence

He looks back at you and begins to speak “hey angel do you ne-“

Before he can even finish his sentence he’s cut off by you crawling into his lap

He’s caught off guard at first, but instantly he wraps his arms around you to tighten your hold on him

You begin laughing as he begins prepping your face with small kisses

Pulling away he looks at you with soft eyes “what’s the matter angel, you missed me already?”

“yes” you say as you begin to nuzzle your face further into his neck.

“okay.” He says as he lightly takes you off “lets go hang out.”

“but what about your notes?”

“i could take a break.”

You smile at your boyfriend as he holds his hand out for you to take.

As soon as you do he instantly brings your body towards his to wrap you in a giant hug

You laugh at his sudden movements, but its evident in your face you’re really happy

Laying down on the bed he pulls your body to be on top of his and kisses you once again

Pulling away he talks “ you’re the prettiest girl I know.”

You blush at his words “oh shut up.” You jokingly say

“im serious,” he chuckles out “you are.”

You drop your body on his and continue to hold him while he tightens the embrace

You can hear the sound of his heart beat, and you can’t help but feel calm

“Iwa.” You whisper

“yeah?”

“im sorry I distracted you from your work, but can we stay like this for a while?”

He lovingly looks down at you. “don’t be sorry, I love being here, with you.”

You look up at him and gently kiss him on the lips as you wrap your body further into his

Wrapped in his arms you forgot this was a challenge altogether

But you were very grateful you tried it out,

Because you couldn’t have asked for a better reaction

[justkending]

Moral of the Story. Chapter Six.

Summary: Marrying too young out of highschool leads to a naive and failed marriage. Now 10 years later, word comes that the divorce was never actually completed. Bucky and Y/N have to come back together after all these years to settle what wasn’t all those years back. Passive attitudes, miscommunicated endings, and reminiscing of old loves and lives all comes back for the two.

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Y/N

Word Count: 3700+

A/N:  Tags are closed for the rest of the series!! Please turn on your notifications if you want updates:) Also, this chapters a good one;)

Chapter Six:

That night, Y/N had plans with Wanda and Vis to go out and get a drink. However, when she called to double check, they asked if they could reschedule for another day. She told them that she was actually planning on staying a full week from Monday and that anytime that week would work for them. 

So she spent the afternoon hanging out with Chloe who came home in the late morning. They went shopping in the art district and caught up over coffee before going thrifting and heading back home before dinner. 

Once dinner was over, where Sherri, Thomas, Chloe, and Y/N hung out as a family, the parents went to bed early and Chloe went over to a friend's house to hang out again. Leaving Y/N by herself reading a book on the back porch. 

After reading the same page for the 10th time, she let out a huff from not being able to still her mind from the events of the morning. 

She looked over at the clock, seeing it was only 9:00. But in her head, it was six. She bit her thumb as she stared at the clock ticking away with each second. After about 14 tiks, she rolled her eyes before going upstairs and changing. 

Maybe a night in town by herself would be nice. She noticed there was a bar Wanda and Vis had mentioned that was next to where they planned to eat and figured she deserved a drink after today. 

So she put on a pair of nice jeans and a simple t-shirt with an old jean jacket that was twice her size from highschool. She fit into a little better now, but it was definitely still giant on her figure. Grabbing her dad’s car keys, she made her way to the mystery bar. 

______________

Upon arriving at the bar, she realized it was a Saturday night, so it was busier than she had planned. 

She found a seat at the bar and ordered a local beer before scanning out the place. 

It was nice. Not really a dive bar, but an actual nice bar. There was still a pool table and a little game spot to the side, but there were booths full of people eating and talking, and even a DJ with a small dance floor on the other side. 

It was a neat little place. Nothing special, but they seemed to know how to make a good drink given the reviews on the menu they proudly displayed from past customers. 

Y/N was going over the menu having finished her last drink pretty fast, but before she could even read the second option on the menu, a familiar voice sounded behind her. 

“Well, looky here. If it isn’t Mrs. Barnes herself.”

Y/N furrowed her eyebrows turning at the comment and instantly, her eyes widened. 

“James?”

“Hey, sweetheart. What are you doing here?” he sauntered to the empty barstool by her. She noticed a weird sway in his walk that helped her put two and two together that something was off with him. 

“I’m getting a drink,” she answered confused, lifting the beer bottle in her hand. 

“I thought you didn’t drink,” he slurred. “And a beer, hmm? I figured that if you ever did start drinking, it would be the fruity stuff,” he chuckled, leaning his head in his hand that was propped on the counter. 

She paid no mind to his thoughts and shot him a glare. “Are you drunk, James?”

He pouted his lips and shrugged with an ‘I don’t know, am I?’ look on his face. It quickly dropped and turned into a smirk as he readjusted in the seat. 

“You know, I hate that you call me James now,” he huffed, swiveling in his seat to face forward at the bar. 

“It is your name,” Y/N shook her head with a sigh. Lord this was going to be interesting. She looked around trying to find Steve or Sam even. “Are you here by yourself?”

“It’s only my name to people who don’t know me. My friends call me Bucky and you’re my friend,” he pouted again, but wasn’t looking at her. Only swirling the amber liquid in the glass tumbler she realized he had in hand now. 

“Friend’s a stretch,” she mumbled, taking a long swig of the new drink. He didn’t hear her though. She looked around a little harder and couldn’t find any sign of someone they knew. “Really. Are you here alone?”

“Yes, and so are you,” he noted, finally turning to her. 

“Yes, but I’m not plastered.”

“Give it some time and you could be,” he winked. 

She shook her head watching as he almost slipped from his chair. 

“Ja-”

“Please don’t call me that, doll. I don’t have it in me to hear you make me feel like a stranger,” he mumbled flagging down the bartender. “Can I get another one please?” He asked, raising his now empty glass. The bartender looked at him with a judging eye, and Y/N jumped in before he could possibly say yes. 

“A water. He’ll have water instead,” she smiled softly. “Please and thank you.”

“Got it,” the bartender nodded before going to get him a glass.

“That’s not what I asked for,” Bucky groaned. 

“We don’t always get our way, do we?” Y/N sighed, taking a long pull from her own drink. When she finally pulled away, almost emptying the glass, she noticed Bucky staring at her. “What? What are you looking at?” she said, slightly off put by the longing look he was giving her without even trying to hide it. 

He broke when he noticed her giving him a weirded outlook and stood up. 

“I need to go to the bathroom.”

Without a second for her to react, he stood up quickly and walked to the back where the restroom signs hung above.

The bartender came back a minute later and slid the glass of water across the counter in replacement to the empty tumbler that he took back. 

“You know that guy? Is he bugging you?” he asked, looking at Y/N who was now holding her head in her hands. 

“I do. He’s an old family friend,” she answered looking down. “Can I get another?” she asked, shaking the now empty beer bottle to the man with a small pleading smile. 

“I can get you something stronger you know? I feel like you may need it,” he said, and she noticed his tone had changed from just a server to something a little more flirty. His smirk giving away his intentions. 

I mean, he wasn’t a bad looking guy. He was a young, probably early 30 year old guy, who for sure made time in his schedule to go to the gym. He had a clean shave, showing his sharp features too. 

“Is it that obvious?” she chuckled, sending him back a small smirk of her own. 

“You look a little strung out,” he chuckled, going to get another drink made up without her having to say yes. 

“Saying it's been an eventful day, would be putting it lightly,” she sighed loudly. 

The guys nodded his head in understanding and smiled as he shook up a new concoction. He poured in impressively into a glass and placed a cherry and lime on top before handing it off to her. 

“On the house for that one then,” he winked. She smiled, adding a hint of flirtatious eye contact to the man, might as well. She was single… Kinda. “Hey, we make a mean batch of shredded chicken nachos too if you're hungry. I might be able to get you a discount.”

“Oh, I’m actually-,” she started, but was quickly interrupted.

“She’s vegetarian,” Bucky practically growled at the man behind the bar as he took his seat back. 

“Oh,” the guy said, taken aback. 

“He’s right, but thank you for the offer,” she smiled politely before sending Bucky a glare. Unfortunately he didn’t see it as he was sending a glare of his own to the man on the other side of the counter. 

Knowing Bucky would make matters worse, she decided to move on from the bartender for the moment. 

“I’m so sorry about him,” she scoffed, placing a hand on Bucky’s shoulder to bring his attention back to her and deter his evil stare from the innocent person. “I think I’m going to get him home actually.”

“I’m not going home yet,” Bucky spoke up, being ignored by the two anyway. 

“Probably a good idea,” the mystery bartender man nodded before looking back at Y/N with that flirty grin again. “Listen, I don’t know if you’re here very often, but I’ll be on shift tomorrow the same time if you wanted to drop by. Maybe I can get you some of our famous fries instead,” he winked, leaning more her direction. 

“That actually sounds nice,” she began.

“Well, I hate to break it to you sir, but she’s married,” Bucky said with a deep voice almost perfectly sober now. 

Y/N shot him wide eyes and saw that any form of drunkenness was hidden in that moment. He had become a big alpha male right there and was showing he was not one to mess with. Was he seriously jealous? Of a man offering her a drink and fries?

“James!” Y/N smacked his arm. 

“What? Am I wrong?” he responded, a hint of anger in his response to her as his eyes showed pain when he made eye contact with her finally. 

“Yes! Very!” Y/N responded. 

“On the contrary, I’m not,” he said, taking a step closer. 

The two were now chest to chest as he looked down at her and she looked up at him. The tension high and their eyes staring into the others soul. Anger and hurt in both their stances and stares. 

“I need to go help another customer,” the bartender spoke up awkwardly. 

Y/N broke from the stare down and sent him an apologetic look. Bucky was still looking at her as if his eyes were magnetically attached to her face. 

“I’m so sorry,” she paused looking for a name tag and seeing Bradley inscripted on a metal plate pinned to his shirt. “Bradley. I don’t know why,” she hissed looking at Bucky for a second who rolled his eyes at her before she turned back. “He’s acting this way.”

“It’s fine. You guys have a good night,” he waved off with a kind smile before sending Bucky a weary look and going back to his job. 

Y/N took a deep breath before turning to Bucky who was still inches from her and looking down at her. His face was stoic and grumpy. 

“How did you get here?” He didn’t answer her harsh tone. “James, how did you get here?” she said, this time leaving no room for silence as she gave him a death glare. 

“I drove,” he answered deeply. 

“Give me your keys,” she laid her hand out in front of him. 

“No.”

“Stop acting like a literal child and give me your keys.” The stubbornness between the two only grew as the other refused to break. “Fine, don’t give me your keys. I’m driving you home either way.”

“I’m not ready to go home,” he slurred some. His facade of trying to cover his drunkenness was fading as he eased up on trying to intimidate someone now. 

“Well, I say you are. Come on,” she rolled her eyes, taking his hand and dragging him to the door. 

“Hey!” he fought back, but she was walking too fast that his alcohol soaked brain was only focused on not tripping and couldn’t work on stopping himself. 

“God, you are a mess. Can’t do anything without fucking supervision,” she mumbled once they were outside.

“You have a mouth on you,” he said as he crossed his arms and waited for her to fish out the keys.

“Yeah, well, some of us have changed since college,” she retorted.

“I’ve changed,” he said softly. 

“You sure as hell aren’t acting like it,” she said through her teeth, frustrated in not finding the keys fast enough. 

“Do you only remember our bad moments? Is that all you allow yourself to think of?” he shot back, but she ignored him and opened his door before moving to the driver side.

The car ride to Bucky’s shared apartment with Steve was filled with tension. Bucky sitting like a scolded child on the side while Y/N was the parent furious with him for causing a scene in a public place. 

“That Bradley guy flirts with every girl that walks in there,” he mumbled about 5 minutes into the drive. He didn’t get a response. When he looked over to see if she had reacted at all, all he saw was a bitch face on her that was focused on the road ahead. “He’s kinda a dick from what I’ve heard the girls say about him that go in and out.”

“Are you there that often that you know the waitstaff's dating profiles?” she sassed. 

“No, I’m just saying from what I know, he doesn’t deserve you.” He had said the last part so softly, that if the car wasn’t as awkwardly quiet as it was, Y/N wouldn’t have been able to make it out.

She turned to look at him finally and saw him with his head propped against the glass of the window. He was avoiding eye contact and had opted to watching the city lights pass by for the rest of the car ride. 

Y/N wasn’t sure how to respond or if she even should. What was the point anyway? He wouldn’t remember any of this in the morning and she wasn’t supposed to care… At least that’s what she told herself. 

She was able to get to the apartment after Wanda sent his and Steve’s address thankfully. 

“Ok, we’re here,” Y/N parked in the front of the apartment. 

It was one of those buildings that looked like a house in a neighborhood where all of them were side by side going up 3 floors. But in their case, each floor was a different flat/apartment. It was updated and in the nicer part of town, so clearly he and Steve were well off. 

From what Wanda had said, Bucky was on the top floor and Steve was renting out the middle floor within the next month. So he had been crashing at Bucky’s until the lease for the current tenant was up and the space was open. 

“Thanks,” Bucky groaned. He had sobered up some from the drive, but considering how far gone he was earlier, he couldn’t be that much better. 

He opened the door and sloppily got out of the car almost tripping on the curb and stumbling to the steps.

Y/N groaned leaning forward and hitting her head on the steering wheel by her hands. 

“Don’t do it Y/N. Don’t do it,” she repeated, but when she looked back up, he was sitting on the middle of the steps with one hand rubbing his temple. “And you’re going to do it…”

She got out of the car and came to the front of him. Her anger had dissipated some and now she felt pity for the poor guy. 

“You good?” she asked, and he looked up with her in surprise. 

“I got a little dizzy,” he answered before going back massaging his head. 

“Need some help?” she sighed, offering her hand. 

He slowly raised his eyes to look at the gesture before looking at her.

“Why are you being nice? I’ve only been a drunken dick to you tonight,” he groaned, taking her hand anyway. “I’m surprised you didn’t dump me off and speed away.”

“Yeah, well. We’ve all been dicks at some point. Doesn’t mean we don’t deserve a helping hand here and there,” she nodded as they walked up the steps. “What button do I push?”

“Last one on the right,” Bucky said, putting his head back down as he stuffed his hands in his pockets and leaned on the door for support from the world spinning around him. 

She did as told, and the button let out a blunt ring as it called the floor above.

“Hello?” a voice replied. 

“Steve? It’s Y/N,” she answered. 

“Y/N? What are you doing here?” Steve asked in shock. 

“I’m delivering you your drunk best friend. Mind ringing me up?” she answered in a tired tone. 

“Uh, yeah, yeah! One sec.” The bell sounded, giving the two access to the unlocked door now. 

Bucky rolled away from it as Y/N opened it for them both and they started their way to the nice elevator off to the side by the stairs. 

Once the doors shut, Bucky looked over to Y/n who had been avoiding eye contact the entire time. He finally took in her presence and noticed she was wearing one of her favorite jean jackets from highschool. One that he had actually gifted to her. He chuckled a little at it as it still hung loosely on her even after all these years. 

“What are you laughing at?” she asked.

And when he met her eyes, he didn’t see the harsh bite back that he had received most of the evening. Instead, there was a small sense of amusement in her question. 

“Nothing, just the jacket,” he pointed. 

She looked down as if she forgot what she was wearing and then it registered. 

“Right, you gave me this for one of our anniversaries,” she chuckled some. He hadn’t heard a genuine laugh from her this entire day. Sure it was the smallest and diluted chuckle ever, but It sounded nice. 

“Still have the patch?” he asked. 

She pulled it away from her body some and looked in the breast pocket, nodding. 

When he had got it, it was nothing special but an older, worn out, and thrifted jean jacket. But to make it special, he found a little iron on patch of the world to put inside the pocket. He had told her that she always had the world in her pocket with the light that she was for it. She would and could do just about anything to make a room and this entire planet light up just by smiling. 

Bucky couldn’t help the goofy smile that came across his face knowing she didn’t rip it out in spite at some point in all these years. That jacket had a little more meaning to them then just being a shield from the brisk air. 

Once the elevator reached the floor, Y/N motioned Bucky out. 

“I don’t know where to go from here, so I hope you’re sober enough to point me the right direction,” she smirked playfully. 

Bucky returned it, not wanting to chance taking away the civil actions happening in the moment. 

“Right,” he agreed, coming out and making his way down the new hall. “Steve,” he shouted loudly. Lucky for them, they had the whole floor to themselves. 

Steve’s head poked out of the door less than a second later. 

“Hey,” he said with a confused face that was attempting to be covered by a kind smile. 

“I’m going to go inside before I made more of a fool of myself,” Bucky mumbled, pushing past Steve who moved to the outside of the hall. “Thanks for bringing me back, Y/N,” he said with a tight embarrassed smile. “Sorry for being a dick again.”

Not that Y/N would have said anything back, but even if she had, he stalked away with his head low and disappeared into the apartment before she would have a chance. 

“Do I want to know?” Steve sighed. 

“Uh, even I’m not too sure what went on tonight,” Y/N responded, putting her hand in the jacket pockets and rocking on her feet. 

“Do I need to apologize for his actions?” Steve chuckled, looking down at her bashfully. 

“He’s a big boy Stevie, he can take responsibilities for his actions,” Y/N chuckled back. 

“Right. You would think he would act like the grown man that he is, but it looks as though we were both thrown for a loop tonight.”

“Guess so.” 

“Hey, Wanda told me you’re here for the week now. Your travel plans changed. Are the rumors true?” Steve asked, moving the subject away from the awkward one. 

“Uh, yeah. I was going to text you tomorrow morning, but looks like I was beat to the punch.”

“Well, we’ll all have to hang out soon then. It’s been too long,” he winked. The two gave each other a quick hug, but Steve didn’t let go and looked down at her. “How are you doing? Clearly the other part of this equation isn’t doing too hot,” he noted, looking in the open apartment door before back at her. 

“Seems we are handling the second part of this divorce a little different than the other, but I can’t say it’s been fun,” she responded, following his eyeline. “Uh, listen. I hate to see you for like two seconds after all this time and split, but I’m kinda beat from the day.”

Steve pulled away and patted her back nodding. 

“No, no. I completely understand. I know from experience, drunk Bucky isn't an easy one to take care of. Plus... Everything else on top of that.”

“Yeah...”

“You go ahead and head home. I’ll call you later to set up a time for the team to meet and catch up. Sound good?”

“Sounds like a plan, Cap,” she winked. 

He rolled his eyes with a smile before waving her off. “Want me to walk you down?”

“Nah, I parked right out front. I should be fine,” she shook her head as she headed back for the elevators. “Um, his car is still at the bar by the way. You may need to go pick it up tomorrow. I didn’t want him driving home, given his state.”

“Thank you for that. I’m sorry again,” Steve grimaced. 

“Don’t apologize, just uh… Just get him some advil and lots of water. I’ll see you later.”

“Will do. Bye, Everest!” he bantered back with her own nickname. 

“God, haven’t heard that one in years,” she laughed before the elevator doors shut. 

With a heavy sigh and lots of thoughts on her mind, the car ride home felt like it never happened. 

Tags are closed for this series. Please turn on notifications if you would like updates:)

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Marvel Tags:

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[tessatechaitea]

Cerebus #11 (1979)

The only weapon you need to provoke a police officer to violence is scorn.

Sorry! The above caption had nothing to do with The Cockroach's first appearance in Cerebus and everything to do with how the Omaha Police arrested peaceful protesters by claiming that they're purpose was to "attack and/or provoke police officers to violence." Also, you can tell they're already spinning and lying by adding the "and/or" so they can imply that the protesters are planning on attacking police. And, well, even if they weren't (and they did say "or"!), their other main plan was to provoke them. But of course everybody whose ability to perceive reality isn't clouded by their incessant need to defend police no matter what understands that police will abuse their power at the drop of an eye roll. They believe any slight disrespect is an excuse for a violent rebuttal. They force physical violence on people whom they have no reason to arrest simply so the person can struggle against the assault, as any normal person would do, and then claim resisting. Police should be confronted by scorn and disrespect at every turn. Only when they learn not to instantly resort to violence and threats will they deserve to not be. Welcome to my comic book and/or police review blog! Deni's "A Note from the Publisher" continues on a theme that I hadn't noticed until just now: every new issue of Cerebus now seems to be a landmark issue! It's an interesting self-promotion take that I have to admit I'd never thought of trying. "Every new Eee! Tess Ate Chai Tea review is a landmark review!" You know what else is a landmark? Places & Predators, my Cribbage-based Roller Playing Game! You don't even really need any friends to play it. Just read it like a book and enjoy it! Or play it like a Fighting Fantasy Adventure Book! Use some online Cribbage app! Figure out how to use the crib in ways the online app definitely won't let you! Oh, the reason this is a landmark issue is because more letters came in than normal! It's a hit! Deni also reveals that she'll be making the Cerebus plush toys that were advertised in previous issues and at half the price! So kudos for stealing that job from the person who originally made them! It probably wasn't anything so dramatic but what fun is going through your life defaulting to the best, most optimistic possibility in every given situation? Have some fun! Act paranoid! Purposefully misunderstand your father and scream in his face! Kick a dog! Sorry! I got carried away! I would never kick a dog unless it was attacking me. But even then, I'd be wishing I was kicking the owner who let it go off leash. The dog doesn't deserve my epic self defense tactics in its soft face. But the owner certainly does!

The basics on the origin of The Cockroach.

I didn't realize Dave came up with The Cockroach because it was gross and disgusting. I just thought it was a more clever version of a bat, keeping to the shadows, hiding, surviving, a constant annoyance to poor people. In any case, The Cockroach is the greatest parody of The Batman, hands down. Because The Batman has become such a parody of himself time and time again, you just need an absolutely Batshit insane version of him. I don't do segues so Cerebus has come to Beduin to sell the Black Blossom Lotus. Just look at all the continuity Dave Sim is giving his readers! I wonder how many comic book fans would list "continuity" as their number one favorite thing about comic books? Like, are there people who would list that above great writing or terrific art? Judging by how terrible a lot of mainstream comic books are and how rabid many of the fans, I'd suspect it was a fairly high number. Maybe 65 out of 100, Bob. Change that card! The Merchant Cerebus deals with is a kook who might just have a super secret identity. It's weird to think of the Roach as being capable of actually living an independent life! I suppose he's just barely hanging onto his sanity at this point (and, of course, only during the day). But then he comes into the mystical aura of strangeness that aardvarks apparently exude out of their buttholes and he just loses it completely. He becomes less a merchant slash superhero and more a superhero slash zombie cosplayer. Also he becomes one of the greatest characters ever created! There are like four of them in the entirety of Cerebus! The exclamation point is because I think that's an incredibly high number and not because I think it's an incredibly low number. Most comic book's protagonists never quite make it to the greatest ever! Plus I'd probably give Cerebus more than four but a lot of them are just really good parodies, satires, and slightly-off representations of characters and people who already existed. The merchant buys the Black Blossom Lotus from Cerebus for 100 gold pieces and then promptly drops it out of the window and into the Feld River.

Not only does Dave Sim come up with a bunch of memorable plots across three hundred issues, he also comes up with a lot of good Dungeons & Dragons campaign ideas.

The Merchant pays Cerebus a sack of gold and gets ready for bed as Cerebus begins to leave. Before Cerebus can even exit the hallway outside the merchant's bedroom door, Cerebus begins to hear loud ranting coming from the other side. It's a lot of hissing and threats of murder. Against his better judgment, Cerebus decides to see what's happening and gets his first look at the guy who will be a huge headache to him for the next two hundred issues or so.

One thing I like about Dave Sim is how honest he is when recounting where he came up with or stole his ideas. He gives plenty of credit for the Cockroach and his hissing to Marshall Rogers and Jules Feiffer. It's admirable because a lot of people would just figure, "It might make me look less of an artist and who's going to know anyway?!"

Just a few days ago, my old elementary school friend who was blown up in Iraq and then became a comedian playing to Christians and patriots (which I mention so you'll understand how, as a wounded veteran, he'll never be criticized by his audience and he'll never really grow as a comedian) posted a Tik Tok on Facebook that was just a film of a television set capturing the "Masked Debate" bit on Last Week Tonight with John Oliver. The clip only shows all the clips of news readers saying "masked debate" and none of Oliver's or the show's set-up. He then watermarked it with his Tik Tok name. Now all of those naive followers who can only seem to reply to his posts with the laugh/cry emoji probably think he wrote it. Better yet, they're probably mostly Trump followers who would never admit to finding that libjerk Oliver or his show funny. What's even better is that the Tik Tok has some quote along top that's watermarked with somebody else's Tik Tok name! So it looks like Bob doubly stole the bit. Man, I wish I'd joined the army and gotten blown up and then found Christ and developed an audience of uncritical naive yahoos who would wildly applaud everything I wrote! Why didn't I join the army?! Oh, that's right. Because I believed I had a future right out of high school. Well, I guess Bob is having the last laugh now! Cerebus follows Cockroach across the rooftops to find out what's going on. He eventually witnesses the Cockroach confront a man in an alley, accuse him of killing his parents, knock him out, and steal his gold. The gold part of the night helps Cerebus to ignore all of the other confusing stuff. The Cockroach doesn't gloat for long. He's off to find another victim! Cerebus witnesses him mug another guy whom he also accuses of killing his parents. He also admits to doing this for thirty years. So now Cerebus thinks the guy is crazy but also crazy rich. At the end of the night, the Cockroach returns home and drops the gold purses into a secret panel in the wall. He falls asleep, wakes up, and, when he sees Cerebus, acts as if Cerebus were just leaving. So Cerebus realizes that the merchant doesn't have any idea what the Cockroach is doing. Which means Cerebus is going to recover those gold purses before the Cockroach comes back! At the moment, Cerebus doesn't realize that he's going to be finding thirty years worth of gold purses in the merchant's walls. Can you imagine how boring the last two hundred and eighty-nine issues of Cerebus would have been if Cerebus managed to steal all of the Roach's gold?! I'm sure some of you are thinking, "It wouldn't have been any worse than the last hundred issues we did get!" Also, can you imagine how fat Cerebus would have gotten drinking tons of ale and eating loads of rich foods? I'm laughing so much just trying to picture it! Ha ha!

Eight feet of gold would make Cerebus fatter than a domesticated raccoon!

In the end, Cerebus only makes it away with three sacks of gold. But in the process, he manages to completely screw up the Roach/Merchant equilibrium that's lasted for thirty years. In trying to exploit the man's mental illness so that he'd help Cerebus move the gold, Cerebus drags the Roach personality into the daylight. From here on out, the Roach will simply be a pawn of others, susceptible to almost any second-rate demagogue (although most of the people who subsequently control the Roach are of the first rate variety). The Aardvark Comment section was two pages this issue and had this letter that I don't think was being sarcastic?

I guess I also wouldn't necessarily consider a chainmail bikini as "a disgusting costume." He's probably thinking about Power Girl.

Also, and I admit it might have been a joke, but Dave Sim reveals that Ronald Reagan is Cerebus' father. That, um, makes sense! Cerebus #11 Rating: A. I almost gave it a B+ for variety but then I remembered I just read the first appearance of the Roach. I also forgot that my ratings don't actually mean anything.

[mollyxxprewett-blog]

a different kind of war: an au.

The students of Hogwarts had their normal days planned. They either paid attention or ignored their classes, hung out with friends, tortured each other, got into trouble -- the norm for a Hogwarts student.

There was already a black cloud hanging over the school; the impending war of blood purity. So when the sky went grey, everyone stopped to look. There was a fear that you-know-who was finally taking over.

Instead, they heard music begin to emerge from the clouds.

Young hearts, out our minds Runnin' till we outta time Wild childs, lookin' good  Livin' hard just like we should Don't care whose watching when we tearing it up That magic that we got nobody can touch Let's make the most of the night like we're gonna die young

Kesha had infiltrated Hogwarts.

No matter what they did, they heard her songs in their heads; songs she wrote and songs she sang. Each student heard a different song. As some students stood near one another, they heard the same song.

Why was this happening? Was this the beginning of the end?With songs running through their heads, no one could figure it out.

Molly & Arthur: Finding You

I know forever don't exist But after this life, I'll find you in the next So when I say "forever, " it's the goddamn truth I'll keep finding, finding you

Ellie & Florence: Hymn

Even the stars and the moon don't shine quite like we do Dreamers searchin' for the truth Go on, read about us in the news Pretty reckless, pretty wild Talking shit and we'll just smile Don't you see these fuckin' crowns?

Emma & Evan: Cannibal

I want your liver on a platter Use your finger to stir my tea And for dessert I'll suck your teeth Be too sweet and you'll be a gonner Yeah, I'll pull a Jeffrey Dahmer

Frank & Alice: Animal

So if it's just tonight The animal inside Let it live and die This is our last chance Give me your hand 'Cause our world is spinning at the speed of light The night is fading Heart is racing Now just come love me like we're gonna die

James & Narcissa: This Love

Even if I leave you now and it breaks my heart Even if I'm not around, I won't cave in I can't give up on this love You've become a piece of me It makes me sick to even think Of mornings, waking up alone Searching for you in my sheet Don't fade away

Bellatrix & Emmeline: Supernatural

Come, take me in the night I feel it in my blood, want the darker side Baby when we touch, look me in my eyes Poison me with love, I'll bring you back to life

Alecto & Amycus: Dancing With the Devil

You and I made a deal I was young and shit got real Weaving through Heaven and back Your love is made of dirty gold But I'm the one who sold my soul So go ahead and take my hand

Regulus & Peter: True Colors

Something tells me, I know nothing at all We've escaped our capture Yet we have our masters And somehow it's like I've waited All my life, one page at a time I'll show you my, my true colors No, no no no I won't apologize for the fire in my eyes Let me show you my, my true colors, it ain't no rainbow

Pandora & Xenophilius: Good Old Days

I'm in love alright with my crazy beautiful life With the parties, the disasters With my friends all pretty and plastered Yeah, I guess we're doin' alright We're fallin' in love Till the sun's comin' up Just livin' the life Every single night we fight to get a little high on life To get a little something right, something real, at least we try

Carlita & Greta: Boots

If you can't handle these claws, you don't get this kitty Baby, pick me up, spin me 'round, take me on a ride Pull you by the belt, recognize that you're mine tonight Baby, pick me up, spin me 'round, take me on a ride Pull you by the belt, recognize that you're mine tonight I'm walking on air, kickin' my blues Everything stops When I'm wearing, when I'm wearing, baby, nothing but your boots

Rabastan & Lucius: Warrior

We're the ones who flirt with disaster, On your ass we'll pounce like a panther. Cut the bullshit out with a dagger, With a dagger, with a dagger. Do or die we all gonna stay young, Shoot the lights out like a machine gun. Think it's time for a revolution, Revolution, revolution.

Amycus & Rodolphus: Boy Like You

I know you know I'm wrapped around your finger You're so Beautiful and dangerous Hot and cold Don't you see the light, boy I could blow your mind, boy Let me be your new toy I do what I want And I get what I want When I want it

Adrian: Party at a Rich Dude’s House

Swimming pool, limousine, come on let's do it Come on let's cause a scene, come on let's do it Cigar in the caviar, come on let's do it Now, come on let's do it, we're gonna do it, now Come on let's do it, we're gonna do this

Andromeda: Bastards

Been underestimated my entire life I know people gonna talk shit and darling, that's fine But they won't break my spirit, I won't let 'em win I'll just keep on living, keep on living The way I wanna live Don't let the bastards get you down, oh no Don't let the assholes wear you out Don't let the mean girls take the crown Don't let the scumbags screw you 'round Don't let the bastards take you down

Atticus: Spaceship

I'm waiting for my spaceship to come back to me It's coming back for me I don't really care if you believe it's coming back for me, yeah I been living in a lonesome galaxy But in my dreams, I see them come ’n rescue me Look up in the sky and there they’ll be I bet you'll think of me then You’re gonna say, "Ooh, look at that, oh yeah, yeah" Damn, if it ain't true They're coming back for me, they're coming back for me, yeah

Bellatrix: What Baby Wants

But you don't really understand She feeds on flesh and blood and boys like you She gonna make you be a man She'll take your bleeding heart and your soul no regrets Baby tells lies baby looks you in the eyes It's her aphrodisiac when she stabs you in the back She comes on like a saint but that's exactly what she ain't Not a damsel in distress she's the devil in a dress

Ellie: Woman

I'm a motherfucking woman, baby, alright I don't need a man to be holding me too tight I'm a motherfucking woman, baby, that's right I'm just having fun with my ladies here tonight I'm a motherfucker

Glenda: Till the World Ends

I can’t take it Take it Take no more C’mon get my on the floor DJ what you waitin’ for? If you feel it Let it happen Keep on dancing till the world ends

Greer: Timber

Swing your partner round and round End of the night, it's going down One more shot, another round End of the night, it's going down Swing your partner round and round End of the night, it's going down One more shot, another round End of the night, it's going downIt's going down, I'm yelling timber You better move, you better dance Let's make a night, you won't remember I'll be the one, you won't forget

Holly: Rainbow

I used to live in the darkness Dress in black, act so heartless, but now I see that colors are everything Got kaleidoscopes in my hairdo Got back the stars in my eyes, too, yeah now I see the magic inside of me I’ve found a rainbow, rainbow, baby Trust me, I know, life is scary But just put those colors on, girl Come and play along with me tonight

James: Tik Tok

Wake up in the morning feeling like P Diddy Grab my glasses, I'm out the door; I'm gonna hit this city Before I leave, brush my teeth with a bottle of Jack 'Cause when I leave for the night, I ain't coming back Tonight, I'm-a fight Till we see the sunlight Tick-tock on the clock But the party don't stop, no

Kingsley: All That Matters

It’s raining gold, been up all night There’s no excuses, we kiss the sky Don’t wanna come down, don’t wanna come down Is anyone out there? Baby, all that matters Is a beautiful life

Lily: Pink Champagne

We don't need no guest list, everybody's invited I'm saying, "Even if you can't get in, we'll dance outside it" We're gonna make this bubble We'll carbonate some trouble  When the line gets flat, gotta take it back to another level Lemme hear you say, ooh Can't keep it bottled up Lemme hear you say, ooh Can't keep it bottled up

Lucius: Blow

We're pretty and sick We're young and we're bored It's time to lose your mind And let the crazy out This place's about to Tonight we're taking names 'Cause we don't mess around

Lucretia: Crazy Kids

Hello, wherever you are Are you dancing on the dance floor or drinking by the bar? Tonight we do it big, and shine like stars We don't give a fuck cause that's just who we are And we are, we are we are, we are we are The crazy kids, them crazy, them crazy kids And we are, we are we are, we are we are The crazy kids, we are the We are the crazy people

Marlene: C’mon

Feeling like I'm a high schooler Sipping on a warm wine cooler Hot 'cause the party don't stop I'm in a crop top Like I'm working at hooters We been keeping it PG But I wanna get a little frisky Come gimme some of that yum like a lollipop Let me set you free

Mary: Praying

I'm proud of who I am No more monsters, I can breathe again And you said that I was done Well, you were wrong and now the best is yet to come 'Cause I can make it on my own And I don't need you, I found a strength I've never known I'll bring thunder, I'll bring rain When I'm finished, they won't even know your name You brought the flames and you put me through hell I had to learn how to fight for myself And we both know all the truth I could tell I'll just say this is "I wish you farewell"

Molly: Boogie Feet

All right Some people, they got the big brains They make all the computer games Some people, they look so sexy Pop and fizzle like a Pepsi Some people, they got the money Drive around in Lamborghinis I don't need any of those things I just wanna dance like a motherfucker

Mundungus: Princess (Customized)

Yo critter crew! (say what) Make Princess Dungus look fine! Add a little pinch of magic from my fairytale life I'm gettin' ready so damn pumped up Even with this wedgie ridin' up my butt Thanks to Mr Crow, you sneaky little fuck! I'm getting customized, customized, customized right

Remus: Learn to Let Go

Been a prisoner of the past Had a bitterness when I looked back Was telling everyone it's not that bad 'Til all my shit hit the fan I think it's time to practice what I preach Exorcise the demons inside me Whoa, gotta learn to let it go The past can't haunt me if I don't let it Live and learn and never forget it Whoa, gotta learn to let it go

Rodolphus: Hunt You Down

I've never hurt nobody, never buried a body Never killed no one, no, no I ain't afraid to get a little crazy Baby, when I'm in love You say you've had your fun And that you're done and I'm the one Just know that if you fuck around Boy, I'll hunt you down

Severus: Hungover

Even my dirty laundry Everything just smells like you, like you And now my head is throbbing Every song is out of tune just like you In the dark I can't fight it 'til it disappears But in the daylight I taste you in my tears Now the party's over and everybody's gone I'm left here with myself and I wonder what went wrong And now my heart is broken like the bottles on the floor Does it really matter or am I just hungover you?

Sirius: Let ‘em Talk

You, you got your own opinions But baby, I don't even need to hear 'em It used to hurt me, used to bring me down Do your worst, 'cause nothing's gonna stop me now Don't let those losers take your magic, baby, yeah