#way to cure eurovision depression

[naapurinheluna]

KÄÄRIJÄ & JOKER OUT / BOJAN REUNION TOMORROW OMFG

[saijspellhart]

Things I binged recently:

(Still coping with grief and depression, and one of the ways I tend to do that is just to distract myself from it all with Netflix. Here are some things I watched or tried watching. And my thoughts on them.)

The Office: Hated this show. Which was a shame because I really really enjoyed Parks and Rec, and these shows are supposed to be similar in style. Unfortunately this show is cynical, mean, and pessimistic. Characters get away with being outright racist, sexist, and antagonistic. Are unapologetic about their hurtful actions, and it sickens me. I was told season one was bad, and to watch season two, and I did. And even season two was awful. And I shouldn’t have to slog through three seasons of a show before it gets to a point where it’s like-able and good. If it takes you three seasons to figure it out, then no thanks. That’s a lot of show I have to suffer through before I MIGHT get to something I enjoy. I loved Parks and Rec because the characters loved and cared about each other, had genuine friendships, aspirations, and optimism. They strived to better the world around them, despite many mishaps and obstacles along the way. Parks and Rec was uplifting and sincere, where The Office is cynical and mean. 1/10.

A Whisker Away: Good, although I found the romance between the main character and her crush to be insincere and weak. I think the message of love would have been stronger if the best friend ended up being the one going to rescue her in the end. It never felt like the boy actually had feelings for her, just a begrudging respect and budding friendship. And it felt like his feelings were guilted and coerced by her actions to run away in the end. Like, “shit, I messed up and she ran away from home. Better tell her I love her, so she comes back home.” I understand that wasn’t what they were trying to do in this film, but it’s how the relationship came across. Manipulative. Especially since most of it was one sided, with her spying on his life as a cat. The love someone has for a pet does not equate romantic affection. Excellent movie for the heavy themes, Magic, and story, just think the overall message and relationships should have been overhauled, and worked around. I think the love the main character’s best friend had for her was more pure and powerful that the one-sided obsessive crush she had on the boy. 6/10.

Brand New Animal: Great show. Both my husband and I loved it. And were gushing about it even after we finished it. My only critique is all the heavy handed exposition. It felt clunky, ham-handed, and unnatural. I think with a few more episodes to the show they might have been able to parse out that exposition and find more natural ways to feed the audience that information, rather than huge unsolicited info dumps on the Main Character. Especially since half the time she didn’t earn that info, didn’t need it, didn’t ask, and just plain shouldn’t have been told some of it. Like why would you just spit classified secret information out to a character you know can’t keep secrets, or even follow directions?? Aside from that, solid characters, solid friendships, cute story, lots of interesting events, and just a blast from start to finish. Would highly recommend it to anyone. If you like Zootopia or Beastars, you’ll probably enjoy this too. 8/10.

Japan Sinks 2020: I. LOVED. THIS. SHOW. Omg, it had me on the edge of my seat the entire time. I just couldn’t stop watching. It’s in the disaster movie genre. Like Volcano, Dante’s Peak, or The Day After Tomorrow. That “what if this catastrophic natural disaster occurred,” and you follow this group of survivors as they work together to stay alive. And damnit if I wasn’t emotionally invested in every single one of them. I wanted to see them survive, and see how they made it through. I wasn’t sure if I was gonna be able to connect as strongly with their struggle given that it was animated rather than live action. But that didn’t matter at all. The tone is serious, and everything is given the weight and consideration it deserves. The animation style has a realistic tone to it, and the fact that it was an anime never got in the way of the journey and the emotions and the intensity for a second. I felt ALL of it. 10/10.

Unsolved Mysteries Netflix (documentary): I’m a slut for documentaries, all kinds of documentaries. So it’s no surprise I watched this. If you like unsatisfying true stories then this is it. A whole season of unsolved crimes. You get all the information wrapped up and handed to you in a neat little interesting package, and are left to just gnaw on it wondering who did it, and if they’ll ever solve it. One of the episodes isn’t a crime though, it’s a UFO story, which was a weird change of pace and tone from the rest of the season. Still creepy, but in a different way. I liked it, but it can be frustrating when you want answers. It gets an 7/10 because I wanted answers.

Kipo and the Age of the Wonderbeasts: I could watch this show over and over again. My husband and I were foaming at the mouth waiting for season 2, and when it finally released, we gobbled it up and then watched it again right after. Excellent show. Post-Apocalyptic story, where the surface of the earth is overrun with mutant animals, and humans are living underground in “burrows.” The main character Kipo gets separated from her people and stranded on the surface, and has to find a way home. Along the way she makes some human friends, and mutant friends, and connects with people through music. And even learns some deep dark secrets about her Mom and Dad, and even herself. It’s a beautiful story emotionally, but also an exciting adventure. I love it. 10/10.

Eurovision, the Story of Fire Saga: Good. Which is saying something because I’m not a fan of Will Ferrell and he plays one of the main characters in this movie. I enjoyed the movie, and it made me laugh. Which was another surprise because I’m a cold-hearted bitch when it comes to comedy, and most things don’t make me laugh. So when a comedy works for me it’s a surprise. And this comedy worked in places. Not ALL places, but it did get some chuckles and a laugh or two. And I did enjoy the story it told. The movie is about two friends who are musicians/singers that enter singing/performance contest, and the drama that ensues along the way. It’s a cute underdog story. 6/10.

Floor is Lava (game show): The name of the game says it all. Groups of three contestants must navigate rooms using only furniture, and chandeliers, and shit. They can’t touch the floor because the room is flooded with hot orange koolaid. And if they fall in they “die.” Prepare to watch grown ass adults hop, hobble, and flop over furniture, tables, and other obstacles, as they try to get from one side of a room to the other side without falling into the koolaid. It’s exciting, and fun, and although the commentary is awful, the struggle of the contestants more than makes up for it. 8/10.

Splice: Never seen this movie before. Thought I’d give it a try since it just showed up on Netflix. It’s... odd. I’m having a hard time deciding if I loved or hated it. It’s an interesting look into what could happen should we start experimenting with human DNA and other sentient life. And how that could go all kinds of wrong very quickly. I like horror, and this delivered on some of the horror elements, but mostly it just jabs you over and over again with moral dilemmas. And you end up feeling like all the characters in the movie majorly failed each other, and they were all the bad guys. I’ll give it a 5/10 because I’m conflicted whether I liked it or not. But it was worth seeing once.

Ju-on Origins: I’ve seen a couple of the Grudge movies, which is the Americanized version of this horror franchise. But I’ve never seen any of the Ju-on movies. So it was a new experience watching this. It’s non-linear storytelling can be challenging to follow, but the stories it’s telling are fascinating and unnerving. I had to watch it with the shitty English dub because my attention span is too short for subtitles. And this wasn’t just a single movie, it’s a show with an entire first season. Episode 4 was definitely where shit hit the fan, and things got really scary. But I like slow burn horror, so I enjoyed the build up of the previous three episodes, and how they just carefully built on the apprehension and dread until things really got scary in the fourth episode. After that the rest of the show is just a roller coaster of highs and lulls, that leave you wondering where the series is gonna go in season 2. Definitely my favorite installment in the Grudge/Ju-on franchise that I’ve seen so far. And it’s got me curious to check out the other Ju-on movies. 8/10.

The Girl with all the Gifts: I’m a sucker for zombie movies and this was a unique and refreshing take on them. The idea is that the zombie outbreak is caused by a strain of the Cordyceps fungus that ends up infecting humans. And the surviving humans are using children born from infected mothers to try and find a cure for the outbreak. The children are like this functioning hybrid of fungus and human, and not completely lost like the humans who were directly infected. The movie explores the moral dilemma of how the children are treated, and the further of humans. I enjoyed the movie, and the concepts. It was a great addition to the zombie franchise. Would recommend. 7/10.

Abducted in Plain Sight (documentary): another crime documentary. This one dealt with a kidnapper/pedophile who managed to kidnap the same girl twice, and the lasting trauma his actions had on that girl. It was sad, and heartbreaking, and horrifying. If you like crime documentaries and have a steely stomach, check this one out. I won’t give it a rating because it deals with real life stuff and children and it’s not a show.

Evil Genius (documentary): one last documentary on this list. I was on a crime documentary spree. Usually I like animal documentaries. This one was about a couple who masterminded a bank heist by attaching a collar bomb to a man and sending him on a wild goose chase scavenger hunt. There’s also a case about a corpse in a freezer, and how the two cases are connected. It’s absolutely bonkers. Just wow. It’s four episodes long, a mini-series, but just an interesting experience. I mostly watched/listened to this while slowly chipping away at a commission. If you like crime documentaries it’s worth a watch. I give this one a 6/10 because I won’t be watching it a second time, but also because I think the format and how they explained everything was kinda long winded.

[leafyemeralds]

OC Summary: Kathe Gavin

Basics:

Name: Kathe Gavin nee Webber

Hometown: Dresden, Germany

Age: 43 (Death)

Occupation: Biomedical researcher

Relationships

Mother of Kristoph and Klavier Gavin

Married to Klaus Gavin

Appearance:

Height: 5′6

Hair color: Blond

Eye color: Blue

Personality:

Kathe Gavin is generally a softspoken and quiet person. However, mentioning her work will make her rant for hours about whatever research she is doing at the time. The only things she loves more than her work are her boys and her husband. When she is angry, she keeps herself calm, but she would never forget the slight. She would always return it one way or another.  She has a habit of internalizing her struggles though. She dislikes exposing her true feelings, so it is always a hassle to get her to open up. 

General Notes

She holds several awards due to her contributions towards cures for various diseases.

When she is not working, she likes to spend her time researching poisonous plants and their uses. 

She is closer to Kristoph than Klavier, since Kristoph was a lot more interested in her work. She was the one who taught him about various poisons and how to utilize them. She was the one who came up with the idea of using poisons in cosmetics, like nail polish. 

Klavier got his voice from her. They used to spend a lot of time singing together when she was home. They also enjoyed watching Eurovision together and tried to copy the singers.

Suffers from depression and anxiety as a result of her rather traumatic childhood. Her goal is to give Kristoph and Klavier the childhood she never had. 

Mysteriously dies in an lab accident when Kristoph is 18 and Klavier, 11. 

[annathesimple]

What everybody brought to the ESC (sprinkled with my humble opinion)

Albania: desire to call the storm your brother (yeah, I dig it and it made me poetic, shut up), run from civilization and make the spirits of the wild your allies. Also: Cleopatra Mom in a Pride dress can I squeal with joy??!

Armenia: empowering song and beautiful performer. I hope she brings her suit *winks*, oh, yeah, and the braids, the braids!! And a familiar face to Ukrainians! ;)

Australia: stop shitting on them, the pips know what Eurovision is about, look at them this year: try to describe this without the word extra. They just embodied the moth&lamp meme. Brought: the daughter-dress of 2018 Estonia and Russia paired with the sexiest dementor you've seen

Austria: if she will look into me like she did in the music video than maybe I will break down, she is tearing at my walls. Brought:  blue hair to make me listen, and it works.

Azerbaijan: a medal for aesthetic goal. It might not exist yet, but it freaking should. Also, I am stealing so many of the things that they used in the music video, you just watch me

Belarus: that white outfit of hers. Or the legs. No, the outfit. Or the legs?.. Which one of these makes me keep staring? (Also brought all these dislikes from Belarussian people, which reminds me - RIP the potato masterpiece of this year)

Belgium: quality Netflix Original's soundtrack. Also a soundtrack to a montage of you running towards your goal and honestly - it's sweet.

Croatia: KAO HEROOOOOJ!!! Also: piano?? hopefully a piano?? We need it, come on, people need to fill out theirs esc bingos, people want to get drunk and we will help them! Also: stairs?? Possknly many stairs??

Cyprus: "Fuego" got reborn and we are being delivered heavy dance beats again, yay!

Czech Republic: oh, the funk, they stolen it? and added an 80' bassline? I hate it and I love it, you have no idea how hard are my relationship with this song is. But facts are facts.

Denmark: A MOTHERFUCKING HUGE CHAIR, I hope they bring it: I am supporting a policy that if you have a lot of space - you should do crazy shit with it. Also: brought German, cause Germany couldn't

Estonia: Aviici wibes and, oh yeah!, another song about a storm! I vote to start a new category for esc bingo: songs featuring storm in their lyrics or title. Also: guitar? Pretty please

Finland: Darude. As a rule I don't list people here, but the rules don't apply to you once you become a meme. Also: Poison Ivy just came to dance on a rotating cube in the middle of the stage - cause that's what you do, that's what I would have done if only I have been confident enough.

France: good boy, cinnamon roll, his wigs are the best and are not to be snatched, ok??! I am getting serious "Phoenix" wibes. Also: cute glasses!

Georgia: yes! They brought these awesome back vocals for which I love them so much!! Also: I feel like Georgia has its goal to make us love Georgian, and idk about you, but it works on mee~~

Germany: SISTAH!!! It's caraoce night and Elsa and Pocahontas are winning it. Also: can I talk about how refreshing it is to see a female duo?

Greece: actual Greece aesthetic wibes?? Beauty, so much beauty. Also: give them swords!! Allow them swords on the stage, cowards!!

Hungary: a song about a dad! I sense a streak! And I want to kiss everybody responsible for keeping it in Hungarian. Also: whistling! That you cannot get out of your head!

Iceland: they got last place last time so they are angry now, ahah. But honestly, we haven't even started yet  and Hatari is already a meme, and we all know that it's the true currency of Eurovision fame. They are worth an essay, it's just I won't do it here.

Ireland: light happy pop for you to finally relax. And, for some reason, nostalgia? I blame Irish magic.

Israel: an Israeli Freddy Mercury with a strong song and a pinch of Disney sound. Interesting in a good way vocals.

Italy: "ramadan" rimed with "Jackie Chan", a big fuck you to all the haters and international versions of D.Trump. Also: ~~soldiii~~, ~~soldiii~~

Latvia: your soundtrack for soft and quiet, warm night walks. Magic the color of black and crimson velvet. The ocean of the eyes.

Lithuania: that one song that encourages you to stand up and go towards what you want, plants a seed of self appreciation inside of you. Good stuff. And his voice is higher than the expectations of your relatives.

Malta: another aesthetics award!! Also - I can't possibly say no to people who put chameleons into music videos. Also: another member of "nana" squad!

Moldova: this year it's them who is bringing us a ballad: and a solid one, + the voice

Montenegro: oh yes!! Finally!! A grandpa!! With a beard!! Playing a traditional instrument!! The sacred commandments are being followed!! Also snow in May aesthetic.

North Macedonia: a powerful ballad for girls and I am here for it!! Go and break the rules! Make everybody fucking emotional!! We need it and we deserve it!

Norway: the sickest Christmas party in a Narnia setting: LET ME IIIN.The furry jokes. And if u think they will stop any time soon - you are wildly misguided. And now we have another version of what does the fox say!

Poland: if you haven't heard them already - probably they brought smth you haven't really expected from them as a folk band. They make me feel things. The outfits!! I said THE OUTFITS!!

Portugal: a true to life representation of my last two brain cells. It's so eary, so unusual that I am in love. Back in my days (and it's like a week ago) I had to do a half an hour long deep YouTube dive to get to music like this. Artttt

Romania: abandoned mansions aesthetic, possible mythical wibes, yessss, bring it to meee!

Russia: Lazarev. They brought Lazarev. You know who he is, what can I say except for: why is his signing is so good??hmm

San Marino: a true leader of "nanana" squad appears!! I like to think that's how San Marino celebrates all of its national holidays. They've always came to Eurovision to party, and they are proving a point once again.

Serbia: I know many like to complain about ballads: but come on, we need at least some, and Serbia delivered, at least we always can rely on Balcan countries for that! Also: I hope she brings her crystal horns with her to the stage, they paid them so much attention!

Slovenia: depressed youth love brought you some indi to relax but also to float into space contemplating your choices.

Spain: is here to cure your depression in case any of the previous songs triggered it. Brought a party, the Sun, and the most Spanish sounding thing I have ever heard. I feel like they thrive out of dandelion wine.

Sweden: changed their formula a bit and suddenly in works on me, and it works very well! There is a literall door to heaven above the stage! That's where they came from! Also: I am in love with the back vocal singers.

Switzerland: a Spanish wibe + some Asian notes/sound?? + heavy dance beat = yeah, they got me, it is indeed good to dance to.

The Netherlands: brought sensitivity and forced it on me, brought tears and put them behind my eyes. Goodness gracious, whyyy

UK: such a sweet happy song, love how the entries from UK tend to be so sunny and bright recently. Brought me desire to hug my friends and close ones.

Please note that I have no intentions of offending anybody, we all are here to have a good time. I respect everybody on this list.

[borisbubbles]

Eurovision 2010s: 50 - 46

50. Poli Genova - “Na inat” Bulgaria 2011

Oh I know, the strength will be within me So that I may reach my destinatiooooooon

So starts one of the most underated empowerment anthems in Eurovision. Honestly, Poli Genova brooks no introduction. The woman is an international treasure and one of Eurovision’s most recognisable dispensers of AGGRO LES ENERGY. 😍 Which is of course the main draw to “Na inat”. It is basically “Proud” but disguised as SCREAMY FEMALE-FRONTED ROCK <3 By a woman who styles herself as this:

And it’s loads of fun. 😍 That one shot of the drummer faking out the camera <3

True, “Na inat” isn’t as good as Poli’s return effort or her jesc hosting stint, but still, it contains all of Poli’s natural kick-ass sass in a smaller packages I could hope for. Merely seeing this motormouthed pixie go for it is a delight. 😍

We’ll see more her, much, much later. 

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49. Aarzemnieki - “Cake to bake” Latvia 2014

Ever since they beat Dons in Dziesma, Aarzemnieki have been called “UNBEARABLY ANNOYING”, “A DISGRACE TO MUSIC” and “DISRESPECTFUL FOR NOT TAKING THE CONTEST SERIOUSLY” by people who themselves have been called “severely misguided”, “malicious troglodytes” and “not my friends” ^__^

Surveys have indeed shown that cake makes life better about 107.2% of the time, so don’t feel angry towards the Aarzemnieki hater: they simply aren’t living life at the best. Therefore, Aarzemnieki love equals self love. Can’t argue with science, yo~ It is, as Raitis would interject,

A PIECE OF CAKE 

and I mean, other than just generally curing my depression and being a generous display of Raitisms and serving some really witty pop culture references and doubling as my go-to humming melody whenever I bake a cake (at least once a month since Eurovision 2014 <3), “Cake to bake” is such a dignified end to Old Incompetent Latvia, entering Eurovision being almost universally dismissed for its frivolity and leaving it being mourned by a sizeable chunk of the fanbase. 😍 So,

MIX SOME DOUGH, 

ADD SOME LOVE, 

LET IT BAKE, 

HAVE SOME CAKE 

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48. Kuunkuiskaajat - “Työlki ellää” Finland 2010

Did you know “Työlki Ellää” translates to: “Working is a way of making a living, too”. 😍 I’m not even sure how the linguistics function here, but FINNISH 😍

As a Finnophonic accordeon-heavy happiness anthem, “Työlki ellää” of course immediately blasted my soul with so much positive ki I now have to punctuate all of my sentences with heart emojis 😍 IT IS SO INFECTUOUSLY HAPPY, without actually being legit annoying, which is highly impressive feat, because, let’s be honest, people who are ‘Cheerful All The Time’ are usually either the most irritating humans to be around, or compulsive lying instawhores. 😍 

Of course, like many other robbed angels in this update, “Työlki ellää” was too merry for that part of the votebase who wish to deny your joy and happiness, which promptly punted Kuunkuiskaajat back to The Shire, but not before they stole the hearts of the eurovision fans that have hearts. 💗

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47. DoRoDoS - “My lucky day” Moldova 2018

[2018 Review here]

BANALITY ANTHEMS. 😍 DoReDoS are probably the single greatest example of the Moldovan Staging Wonder, taking a painfully antiquated nondescript schlager-folk drone and turning it into a Legitimately Funny farmer’s comedy <3

Take a tumble in a world of:

HILARIOUSLY EXAGGERATED FACIAL EXPRESSIONS

HOT DOPPLEGÄNGERS

SITUATIONAL COMEDY

LIVE GROPING

What a rags-to-riches story. 😍 Made even better by the fact that DoReDoS are in fact commited SovBots, and therefore are forced to mime humour, which they do very awkwardly 😍 enhancing the comedy even more. 😍

Is DoReDoS’s score inflated by the fact that they’re the only good OTT joke act (yes, i know “Toy” exists, but I’m also older than twelve) in a very humourless year of Eurovision? Hell yeah, absolutely. Is this a bad thing? Fuck no. Every year needs a moment of levity, a moment where you can just sit back and enjoy seeing the madness unravel before your eyes, without racking your brain at the underlying meaningitis. “My lucky day” is blissfully simple and efficient. It is one of the funniest Eurovision entries of all time and if you can’t appreciate it, well, your loss. 😊

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46. Sebalter - “Hunter of stars” Switzerland 2014

I’ll open by noting that Sebastiano is a lawyer. THIS MAN DEFENDS PEOPLE IN COURT:

As you might expect, I fell in love with this magnificently neurotic stonergod the instant he drunked his way towards winning the Swiss NF. 😍 Of course what I expected of Sebalter was that disarming neurosis wrapped in an NQ bow, but he gave us so so so much more. 

First of all, “Hunter of stars” is the rare bluegrass bop and like many in the elite tier, unabashedly cheerful, infinitely replayable and utterly impossible to sit through without singing or dancing to it’s whimsical whistling tones.

Second of all do my ears deceive me or is this song about JOB INTERVIEWS??? 😍 Well, it’s about applying for a job and the worries about not being good enough, which is both so Sebastiano AND so fucking relatable. Heavens knows how many time I wanted to storm in an row like a lion, but got rejected because of me and my imperfections.

Thirdly, Sebastiano actually overcame his nerves, so this high ranking is less of an “aw bless”, and more of a “wow you really did this 😭”. He performed with fiery confidence and wonderful esl diction (”row like a lion”, “i’m suet, i’m dirty”) and absolutely deserves to be put amongst the select group of singers who OUTSOLD their song.

(and yes he lost his voice in the funale, but that’s why I rate by best performance only :teehee: 🤭)

Fourthly, after spending months in palpable anxiety, worried for Sebalter and Tinkara, they were the first two names announced amongst the qualifiers and it was the best birthday gift ever. 😍 I promptly jumped from my counch, poured myself two glasses of red, immediately downed them, passed out and woke up cured from depression. What a wonderful time to be alive. 

[cyabae]

TOP-10 Naruto Eurovision Characters

No one asked for it, but this is what the world needs right now. I’m going to list top-10 characters who would perform well in Eurovision. And to the person who’s asking: “Is this post cursed?” - no, it’s blessed with sparkling vibes, love, love, peace, peace. ♡

10. TSUNADE

Look, I know, I know… When you think about burning pianos and sparkling outfits, Tsunade isn’t the first person who comes to mind. However, you can bet that she’s the one who found some extra money to support the broadcast, made sure that the safety standards were met and bought some champagne (out of her own pocket) for the Raikage to convince him that Kumo doesn’t fall apart even if it shows this glitter feast to its citizens. Probably made all the confetti herself, yes, the whole stadium of it ‘cause everyone else was too distracted. Sure, she passed out 15 minutes before the show began but she’s the one who’s behind of it all and therefore should win. But since we want more sparkles, we’ll give her 1 point.

9. SHISUI

Every good song contest needs a ballad. Fear not, Shisui is the right man for the job! His beautiful sad red eyes will capture your chakra and make you sob like no tomorrow as he begins to sing a song about blindly falling into a swirling abyss. No one knows whether his best friend is able to save the day. It’s possible that Shisui’s early demise was in vain. That’s depressing, people conclude, as Shisui smiles softly for one last time. A tragic death is something that everyone can relate to – we’ve all been there. However, the jury is kinda awkward ‘cause there are speculations that this song has Danzō references, 2 points but in our hearts, the ballad boy is the true winner of the night.

8. DEIDARA

Oh, wow, the atmosphere got kinda sad after those heartbreaking melodies. It’s time to lift up the mood with a big, big BOOM! Deidara will steal the show with his self-made clay bombs. The rumor has it that someone else was going to take care of the fireworks before our favorite pyrotechnic took the matters into his own hands (quite literally). His high-quality standards were too much to chew for the art director. Deidara’s performance will absolutely bombard you with fleeting beauty of explosions and 2007 nostalgia, 3 points!

7. KISAME

Ballads and groovy rock hits are essential. However, there’s a beautiful middle ground to be found between the two. Enter the sharkman Kisame! There’s something so chill about him that it puts the audience in a good mood. When he steps on the stage, you can almost feel a light sea breeze and hear a distant cry of seagulls. And oh boy, what do we have here? A Samehada? That’s so wicked, just like those geysers that extinguish the fire from the previous performance, possibly saving dozens of lives. Wherever Kisame goes, good luck follows. Except for that one time in Kumo. This unfortunate occurrence doesn’t require any attention right now. This night is all about peace and love, all that morbid talk about sharknados can wait. 4 points.

6. MADARA

Go big or go home! It’s Madara’s turn. He’s prepared for his moment of glory for decades and won’t be afraid to spice up things with some meteor showers and hundreds of copies of himself. Those clones may seem invisible but they’re conjuring meteor showers, too. We may never know whether the lord First himself is impressed. He probably is. At least the rest of the world is in awe. Technically, Madara is banned from the event due to multiple violations of the rules, but even the jury is too amazed to care. They want to acknowledge the persistent work and grand him 5 points before anyone realizes that banned performances are banned.

5. GAI

The Green Beast of Konoha is about to hit the stage. He was absolutely made for quality content like this. His jumpsuit has been a song contest classic ever since the dawn of time, not to mention that this dance-friendly outfit allows him to move smoothly. The dress is a killer, youthful like a lunchbox. Gai’s presence sets every piano in the world on fire, and you can bet that those flames are also emerald green. 6 points.

4. JUUBI

Once you think you’ve seen it all, it’s Juubi’s turn! The jury thinks that a gigantic chakra monster isn’t an appropriate singer but whatever. Their killjoy attitudes won’t stop people from loving the roars of their very favorite annihilator. Magnificent! Bravo! 7 poäng!

3. RIN

Pheww, what a show! Hearts are racing. A good old ballad will cure our chest pains. Now, let’s hear about that one time when Rin needed to get an assisted suicide. Naturally, everything went horribly wrong and now she’s doomed to watch over her friend from afar, thinking to herself that this wasn’t what she signed up for. Her only joy in life is knowing that once a year, there’s this one day of peace. Even her idiot friends seem to respect that. But it’s a small console given that she’s still kinda dead and now everyone thinks that she’s super against the Infinite Tsukuyomi whilst all she ever wanted to do was to start a revolution along with her best friends. Her story is the greatest tragedy of all times, 8 points.

2. KAKASHI

Looks like the next performer doesn’t believe in glitter. Kakashi is dressed in his standard jōnin outfit. He has 5 of them just in case. Sometimes he can muster enough motivation to do laundry, and that’s a little miracle. Laundry days are the good days. Life’s treated him roughly. Still, this man took over when Tsunade passed out and personally prevented 900 deaths behind the scenes. He doesn’t want any credit for it, he just did what had to be done. The strength of this man is his sense of duty. It’s unbreakable. When the world is falling apart, Kakashi is your last hope. He isn’t kidding around, and if he must attend to this madness, he will do it. One could argue that Kakashi isn’t very wholesome, but something about him pleases everyone. The jury loves him, Konoha council loves him and the opposing side of those state marionettes loves him. After all, he’s becoming Tsunade’s successor but no one has asked their Sharingan back, just saying… Love for Kakashi is universal. 10 points for love’s sake.

1. OBITO

A good song contest is made out of ballads, quirky outfits and meteor showers. With that being said, you can’t have a real show without the walking, talking shitpost. When Tobi takes over, the whole world will gasp. Some think that the kitsch lollipop mask is too much and rightfully so, whilst the others think it’s ingenious. They are right in their own way. Tobi is a good boy and a fashion icon. You know who else is both of those things? Obito! He’s prolly not impressed by the concept of the competition. He doesn’t think that mere individuals should represent the prisons that are their nations. But he’s here. It’s time to put an end to this misery and let the world rest in peace. No more pain, no more suffering. The jury tries to protest. That’s their problem. Obito will create a new world, a better one. Admit it, this plan is THE BEST, and no bans and boycotts can prevent Obito from giving the world a… Good. Fucking. Show. Sure, the plan wasn’t his idea, but he did all the hard work – and therefore he’s the winner. LONG LIVE FREEDOM, 12 POINTS!

[cataractluna]

Dima Bilan - Believe (Russia) 2008 Eurovision Song Contest Winner

Why is everyone sleeping on this - or are you too young to remember? Oh my goodness sweet ones let me tell you what this is about. This, my children, belongs to one of the most flamboyant performances you will ever see.

Three Russian sappy men (featuring a candle and two Russian ladies in the dark) performing and winning.

One of the KINGS of ESC, Dima Bilan, singing his heart out that nothing can stop him if he just believes and ripping his shirt open in the last act,  the dramatic violinist Edvin Marton who lives for his body language (and violin of course), moving in a sad soulful way and wonderfully accompanying Dima and finally, freaking Plushenko skating on a six feet “rink”, enjoying the time of his life on Eurovision while the other two are sharing his, still 6 foot, rink space. 

Naturally, Russia won. (P.S. 2:26 will cure your depression)

[naapurinheluna]

ok but u can’t tell that wille doesn’t look like kris from joker out in here (s1e2)

[naapurinheluna]

KÄÄRIJÄ POSTED TO HIS IG STORY A VIDEO OF HIM & JOKER OUT MAKING PIÑA COLADA (the video is years old) SO WHAT ELSE IT COULD MEAN IF NOT THAT JOKER OUT/BOJAN IS GOING TO HIS GIG IN HELSINKI TOMORROW FKDKDLSLKRR

ALSO HE SAID BEFORE IN HIS IG STORY THAT THERE ARE GONNA BE SOME SURPRISE VISITORS AND BOJAN SAID IN A INTERVIEW YEARS AGO THAT HE WANT TO GO FINLAND WHEN KÄÄRIJÄ HAS A BIG GIG AND KÄÄRIJÄ HAS 2 SOLD OUT GIGS IN HELSINKI TOMORROW

i’m not going to there but i trust on tiktok

BUT I’M LITERALLY CRYING RN MY HANDS ARE SHAKING THEY’RE THE BEST THING FROM THIS YEAR’S EUROVISION SO I’M EXITED THAT THEY MAYBE MEET UP AGAIN!!!!!!

yeah and i have to say that no one has said that they’re going to finland, i’m just making some rumours but it seems obvious to me, like why it can’t happen??

i’m just fangirling over their friendship as a finn whose fav entry from this year was slovenia’s

KDKFKEIEIRIRKRKEKDKEKEKWQ AAAAAAAAAA

[naapurinheluna]

yeah we all know that bojan is in finland (!!! 😭😭😭 !!!) but monika is also in france, visiting la zarra !!!! omg i love how eurovision puts people together like this and i’m here for it

ok i ship them also