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How to study productively: In the Library
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#slavic roots western mind
As experience taught me and many people, the library is a fantastic place to study in, especially for those living in dorms with chaotic roommates.
Don't get me wrong, chaotic can be good, but not when you're trying to finish that math set, or that literature paper.
So where do we go? The library is a pretty safe choice, but how do you actually study productively there? Even the library isn't free from distractions, especially when crammed with like-minded people trying to find a place to study.
Whether it's the obnoxiously loud laptop key tapping, grating coffee slurping, frustrated sighs and the occasional sound of someone's head slamming against their books (pretty common actually, especially in the med library), the library can be full of distractions, even more so when it's quiet.
For some reason, the quieter the place, the louder the distraction.
Here's my guide to studying effectively in the library, regardless of whether you're alone or squished together with other people like a can of sardines.
Headphones, earbuds, airpods, earplugs - if it blocks noise, it's your bff
If you prefer listening to music whilst studying, whether it's swedish rock, white noise, classical piano or acid jazz - you're no stranger to blocking out noise, so continue confidently.
If you absolutely hate any type of noise and need 100% silence to focus, then still wear some type of earbuds or headphones. It might not remove the noise completely (or it might depending on the quality), but it's much better than being subjected to an entire plethora of sound.
2. Dress comfortably - save the cute fits for actual class.
"Dress comfortably" - one of the most vague statements I have ever heard of. Pjs? Sweatpants? Leggings? Whatever comfortable means to you, wear it.
Chances are you'll be in the library from morning until the evening during exam week, so comfy and loose trousers are the way to go.
3. Don't study with your friends unless it's a verbal exam or a group project.
Sit away from each other, preferably on different tables or even floors but always get together during breaks to have a quick catch-up.
Sitting together means that you'll end up distracting each other and turn a would-be productive study session into a chill hangout. It's important to make time for friends, but not when you're trying to study!
I made the mistake of trying to study with a friend in our uni library during my 1st year, and it ended up with use sending each other cat videos and silently cracking up for 2 hours before our next class. Fun, but not entirely productive.
4. Turn off your phone's wifi when studying.
Don't turn it off completely, because emergencies can happen and you may need to be available. Instead, turning off your wifi gets rid off most notifications, and if it's really that important then they can call you instead.
5. Decide in advance what you'll be studying, and bring the relevant material.
Trying to decide if you want to get started with your history paper or go over your spanish notes and whether you have the right notebook can waste quite a lot of time.
You can easily do that by using or creating a study planner to increase your study productivity, as instead of spending 15 minutes on sorting everything out and making a note in the back of your textbook that you studied this and that, you'll know exactly what to study.
6. Bring snacks and drinks - include enough water! leave the coffee alone!
You'll definitely want to have a proper lunch or dinner or a linner, depending on personal needs, but you don't want to get distracted when you're in the zone.
Here is where snacks and water come in handy. If possible, stick to healthier snacks, but if those aren't available eat whatever works best for you.
And please don't forget ✨water✨.
That headache that you usually get around, say 6ish when you're headed home? Coffee could be the likely culprit, especially if instead of water you've been chugging coffee and energy drinks like ehem, water.
I'm no doctor, but drinking your bodyweight in caffeinated drinks doesn't seem to be too healthy. I get that it's tempting (and i'm definitely guilty of drinking way too much coffe), but your health affects you and your studies. So take care, replace some of that coffee with water, and enjoy some better sleep.
7. Check the library hours.
Some library's are open 09.00-20.00, others have more specific hours, whereas quite a good few are open 24/7. If you're planning an all-nighter, then definitely check the library's working hours. You don't want to be forced to leave just when you've finally managed to get the hang of a particularly difficult concept, so plan accordingly.
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8. Switch it up with your seat.
Don't just study at the same spot, try out different locations. Not only can you find the perfect spot, but you'll be more alert as your mind gets used to the new location.
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dreamy-love222 · 6 months ago
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dude how can i study for 5-6 hours and stay skinny and active???
Make a list of your priorities. Also study when you have free time. When you commute study. When you’re on the treadmill (outside of your workout) put on low speed and reread what you need to learn. Study on your bed if you don’t feel comfortable on your desk. Or a low table that’s what I have been doing because my back has been killing me these days.
Study during lunch time. I find it easier to study earlier in the day so do that.
Make the most out of your class hours. Always do more. I print exams I found on the internet and do them after I do what the teacher tells us to do. When i finish those I rewrite the lesson. I end up doing what should be done in 5hours in 2 hours. (This is mainly in maths)
In subjects that you are really good in (I don’t really suggest doing this but I maintain my full grade in English and after I quickly do what the teacher tells me to do I start doing other stuff that’s harder for me or takes more energy) use the free time you have there to study more. Make your revision cards rewrite the lesson, don’t do something that takes a lot of concentration because you still want to focus when you need to also please don’t get caught!!!!
Dedicate one hour of your day to working out. Ideally 30min cardio and 30 mins strength training you can try to say a lesson you have a test on by heart while you’re working out it’s okay if you can’t do it at least you know what you don’t know now and after you finish working out !
I do it all and I still have so much time to binge purge. You have the time. It’s how you spend it. It’s going to pass either way. Would you rather it passes with you slacking off/binging/not being productive or making the most out of it? That’s how I try to think and it scares me Into being crazy productive
Oh also being competitive. If it helps you stay productive then be as competitive as you can be. Want the best for yourself. It’s not selfish it’s called having aspirations and high hopes🩷🩷🩷💪
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raineandsky · 1 year ago
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A Date in Exchange
(Part 1) (Part 2) (Part 3) (Part 4) (Part 5) (Part 6) (Part 7)
My parents are asking if you’ll come over again. Are you free this week?
That’s the text message the villain received two days ago. They’d checked their calendar, only to find a lack of an excuse. They’d replied after a minute of racking their brains for a way out, only to send back a short i guess
So the villain is, rather stupidly in their mind, getting into the hero’s car for a second trip. It’s only a matter of time before this backfires and they get dropped off right outside the agency doors.
“Hey,” the hero greets as they slump into the seat. It’s the kindest greeting the villain’s ever gotten. “Surprised I didn’t have to promise you a banquet for this one.”
The villain slams the door behind them, careful to keep their gaze pointed out of the window. The reflection boasts the tinge in their cheeks at the insinuation. “If there isn’t one I’ll rob them again.”
It’s the hero’s turn to blush, a lot harder to hide. “And look how that turned out last time.”
-
“It’s so lovely to see you again!” the hero’s mother greets the villain, as if this is all some pleasant surprise and not an event practically planned by them. “Please, both of you, inside.”
The villain truly cannot believe their last visit here hasn’t put the hero’s parents off. It was hilarious to watch the hero fumble to correct their nemesis’s phrasing, but bringing the whole ordeal to an end would’ve been a nice bonus. It’s a shame that they clearly took the villain’s insanity in their stride.
“How’re the physics classes coming along?” the hero’s father asks when the pair of them are ushered into the living room. “Blow anything up yet?”
Ah, yes, the villain’s ‘studies’. The hero had mouthed sound smart! at them, and they did exactly what they’d asked. “I’m studying physics at the city university,” they’d told the hero’s parents, but that garnered too much praise, so they’d added: “Gonna learn to blow things up with science.”
“Still working on that,” the villain tells him with a grin. “Professor won’t let me. Not yet, at least.”
The hero looks genuinely relieved to find a small buffet set at the dining table. “Thank god we can get you fed, my love,” they say with a friendly pat on the villain’s shoulder, and from the slight raise of their eyebrows the villain knows they have no chance of nicking anything a second time. The name makes their stomach churn in a way that has little to do with the food in front of them all the same.
“How’re things between you both?” the hero’s mother asks sweetly once they’re all settled at the table. “You look well.”
Clearly the villain’s agitated undertones are going unnoticed. That’s consolation to the hero too, from the way they throw her a smile in poorly hidden relief. “Yeah, good. Still going strong, aren’t we, my love?” the hero asks, and plants a quick kiss on the villain’s forehead for realism.
The villain laughs tightly to avoid giving away the heart attack they think they might be having. “Yeah, strong as anything.”
“How long's it been? We only heard about you recently,” the hero’s father comments idly.
This was not a question either of them had discussed answering. The two sit in silence in case the other starts answering, the villain pretending to do the maths and the hero staring thoughtfully into the distance.
“About five months,” the villain says when it’s clear the other isn’t going to say anything.
“Five?” the hero’s mother echoes in disbelief. “Why, your father was giving me a ring as big as my hand by five months. What’re we waiting on?”
“Oh my god, mother,” is all the hero says in defence.
Suddenly this whole plan just expanded from a few months to years. The villain’s brain is close to shutting down suddenly planning out the rest of their life from this point forward. The hero says something but they don’t hear it, already imagining the sacrifices a life of lies would entail. A hand settles on their shoulder, and the touch startles them to their feet.
“[Villain]?” the hero asks, and the barefaced concern in their voice tips them over the edge.
“Sorry, I, uh…” Fuck, they’re stuttering. When have they ever been this uptight? “I just remembered I have a, uh, appointment soon, so I, ah–”
They’re at the dining room door. They’re not entirely sure how they got here. The hero’s parents watch with wide eyes, the hero themself already on their feet. All they hear is a pissed “Why would you say that?” before they shut the door behind them and make their great escape.
(Next part)
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Day 8 - Maths games and Jolly Phonics
We awoke groggy but enthusiastic for our next day of teaching at Limapela Cedric School. We had breakfast at 7:30am again this morning. We had fried eggs, toast, sausages and baked beans, served with pineapple juice, which fuelled us for a busy day ahead. 
Once we had arrived at the school we split into three groups, teaching Pre-school, Grade 2 and Grade 3, helping them to consolidate their understanding of addition and basic subtraction. We used a range of games such as playing cards to help them with counting and addition by counting the symbols on the cards and using their fingers, dice games and number cards. As we were working with the same group of students, it was great to see that they had learnt the games and we were able to add some more challenge. The Limapela teachers will keep the resources once we have left and will contine to use the games with their classes.
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At 10:45 we headed back into the classrooms to work with a Grade 6 class. We started with a game of noughts and crosses where we split the class into the Green and Yellow teams. They had to answer an addition, subtraction, multiplication or division question to put a nought or a cross on the grid. The Greens won 4-0, a crushing defeat for the Yellow Team. After this, we played a Jolly Phonics based game where we held a table of the sounds and split the class into the same 2 teams. One player from each team would come up and the rest of the class would be shown a sound and would have to make it. The fastest player won. These are games that we learnt at our Jolly Phonics training on Friday and are being rolled out across most schools in the Copperbelt and beyond by Beyond Ourselves to help with basic literacy. After the session we had lunch of nshima with fish - some of us were even invited to help make the nshima!
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The afternoon consisted of sporting activities followed by filming Jolly Phonics videos for some and helping teach a computer studies lesson for others. The group for the sporting activity divided into 2 with one group doing a series of football drills followed by a match and the other group introducing rugby netball to grade 9s.
We walked back from school agan like yesterday with many of the students going the same way. Once back at Mist Gardens, we concluded the day with some reflections around the fire. We all thoroughly enjoyed time in the classroom and working with the teachers and students from Limapela. We will return tomorrow for the morning before saying goodbye.
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deerskulls · 1 year ago
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@nosebleedclub // oct 2+3: fall schedule + losing team
On Tuesdays, we meet at the local diner for breakfast at 6 am, way before the first bell rings at school.
Most mornings, I order pancakes and drench them in syrup, guzzle down lukewarm black coffee from the pot the waitress knows by now to leave for us on the table. We pass it around and take turns pouring, clasp our hands tight around our mugs like a lifeline.
On this particular Tuesday morning, it's just me and Brenda in the whole diner and Brenda is giving me a dressing-down.
"Lou, you've got to get your shit together!" Brenda tells me.
"I know," I moan. It's only 4 weeks into the fall semester and I'm already failing math.
Unlike me, Brenda is the type who studies all the time, fully dedicated to going to Yale next fall. She'll probably be valedictorian of our class when we graduate next spring. As for me, I just want to pass and get it all over with.
I cut her some slack, knowing that her nagging me is all she has going for her these days, besides studying her ass off.
"What are you gonna be for Halloween?" I change the subject, having enough of Brenda's nagging for the moment.
Brenda sighs and twirls her spoon in her coffee. "It's too early to think about that. Halloween isn't for another couple weeks."
I gape at her lack of dedication to the most important holiday of the year. "Brenda! We have to have the best costumes in the whole school! We're seniors now, it's our last chance to show off. I was thinking we could do a group thing with Joel and Corvus and the others."
Brenda stares into her coffee cup for a minute, drenched in silence, before looking up at me with puppy dog eyes. "I can't focus on Halloween right now, I have more important things to think about. Can't you just pick my costume for me?" she pleads. "Especially if it's gonna be a group thing."
I grin at her, thousands of ideas running through my head. "Oh, this is gonna be so good! Just wait until you see what I come up with."
Brenda pales a little at my enthusiasm. "Wait! Don't make it too crazy, okay? My parents will kill me if it's too inappropriate."
I sit back in the booth and smirk. "Brenda, your parents won't even recognize you when I'm done with you."
Brenda grabs my wrists. "Lou, please! I'm serious. I'll get in big trouble if my tits are out or something!"
I shake her off. "Fine, fine, you're no fun." Brenda's face falls, so I grab her hands between mine. "I'm just kidding! You're the most fun, like, ever, especially when we study together, ooh it's so much fun, I love when you teach me derivatives, it's the most fun I've had in ages!"
Brenda rolls her eyes and pulls her hands from my grasp, a smile teasing the corners of her lips. "No need to lay it on so thick, Lou. I get it, okay? You didn't mean it."
Satisfied that I had successfully cheered her up, I returned to my pancakes, stuffing a huge bite in my mouth.
"You goin' to th' game on Fri'ay?" I ask around the bite of pancake in my mouth.
Brenda scoffs. "Not likely. I have to study for my history test on Monday. Besides, we always end up losing anyways."
"Aw, come on!" I pout. "It's good fun regardless." I lean over my plate of pancakes toward Brenda and drop my voice down to a whisper. "I nicked some vodka from my parents' liquor cabinet." I sit back and look at Brenda's shocked face. "Besides, Daniel will be there," I say at normal volume, smirking. Brenda colors, as expected.
"I--uhh, so what if Daniel is there!" Brenda exclaims loudly. Our waitress looks over at us, annoyed. I wave at her apologetically, mouthing sorry!
I roll my eyes. "Oh come on, Brenda! I know you like him. You keep staring at the back of his head during English. I have to take notes for once, just to keep you from failing!"
Although I complain about taking notes, English is my favorite class and I truly don't mind. But no one can know that. I have a reputation to maintain.
Brenda is bright red at this point. "I do not," she hisses. "I just--spaced out a little that time. Yeah."
I laugh. "Bren, you're fooling nobody except yourself. There's nothing wrong with having a little crush!"
Although, it's Daniel. She could've chosen better. Brenda should go with someone who's more her speed, someone nerdy and dedicated to school like her. Not dumb jock Daniel on the school's loser football team who could barely string two words together when we had to present our poems to the class during the poetry unit. Stupid Daniel with his perfect hair, straight white teeth that shone when he grinned, broad shoulders that tapered to a trim waist--
I shake my head at my thoughts, shocked. Whoa. Where did that come from?
"Lou!" Brenda snaps her fingers in front of my face and I'm jolted out of my internal crisis. "It's time to go, we're gonna be late to homeroom!"
I sigh. "Fine, fine." I flag down our waitress and pay the bill, treating Brenda this time to make up for my teasing. She's just so easy to tease, I can't help it.
Brenda smiles at me gratefully. I also know she's tight on money at home, so if I can do anything to help her out, I will. After all, she's my best friend.
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ohmeowmy · 2 years ago
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math ask game: 1, 6, 55
thank you for the ask!!!!
what math classes have you taken?
erm idk how well this maps onto the class system..... ive taken.... algebra 1 and 2, high school geometry, linear algebra, precalculus, calculus 1, and currently studying calculus 2 in coaching!
6. why do you learn math?
i think math is really cool! theres something so Nice about the preciseness of math and the way numbers just click together. as someone who works mainly with estimates and averages (the first time i saw that you had to round up an answer in physics i was traumatized) also i like the wizard aspect of it - its something that is essential to our lives but we need to understand and study it to truly grasp its essence. also i love teaching and it grew from my father teaching and helping me with math to me tutoring my little brother in the same subject. there's something so precious about that 'aha!' moment, the moment when all the pieces fall into place.
55. what is your favourite place to do math?
i have a cozy little laptop table set up on my bed because sitting at a desk just aggravates the Illness.... so on my bed curled up under a thick blanket with a jacket and socks on and a steaming mug of coffee or at my workdesk with all of my study material close at hand.
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majorkalshiclassesald · 2 years ago
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With the increasing competition in the Defence sector, making a career as a commissioned officer in the Indian armed forces has become a  challenge.  But no need to worry, with the right guidance you can always make the uniform yours. Those who have aspired to join the Indian Army, navy or Air Force through the NDA exam must begin their preparation well in advance. In this cut-throat competition, clearing the NDA written exam is already a tough nut to crack. Then this is not it, after the NDA wrote you will have to appear for NDA SSB Interview and then the medical examination. Further details regarding the National Defence Academy examination are provided with the help of tables.
The National Defence Academy's Army, Navy, and Air Force wings recruit qualified candidates through a national-level entrance exam known as NDA, which is held by UPSC twice a year. Candidates who plan to apply for the exam should begin their preparations by creating a study plan and a competitive strategy.
NDA Exam - Overview
Name of the Exam
UPSC NDA 
NDA Full Form
National Defence Academy
Conducting Body
Union Public Service Commission (UPSC)
Purpose of the examination
To find candidates to join the Army, Air Force, and Navy as a Cadet or Officer Trainee
Exam Frequency
Twice a year
Exam Category
12th Pass
Selection Process
- NDA Written Test exam 
- SSB Interview
Number of applicants
5-6 lakhs
Exam Center
41 Test Cities across India
NDA Eligibility Criteria
Educational Qualification
Academy
Educational Qualification
NDA Course (For Army Wing)
12th Class pass of the 10 + 2 education pattern or equivalent exam organized by the State Education Board or University.
NDA Course (For Air Force and Naval Wings)
12th Class pass in the 10+2 education pattern with the subjects of math, physics, and chemistry, or examinations equivalently conducted by a state education board or a university.
Age Limit
The exam is only open to unmarried male and female applicants between the ages of 16.5 and 19.5 years.
Physical Requirements
Minimum Heights for Female Candidates Joining NDA
Army
Navy
Air Force
Female Candidates Height
152 cm
152 cm
163 cm
Gorkhas and candidates belonging to Hills of North Eastern region of India, Garhwal and Kumaon
148 cm
147 cm
147 cm
Ground Duty Branch
_
_
152 cm
Lakshadweep
_
150 cm
150 cm
Minimum Heights for Male Candidates Joining NDA
Army
Navy
Air Force
Male Candidates Height
157 cm
157 cm
163 cm
Gorkhas and candidates belonging to Hills of North Eastern region of India, Garhwal and Kumaon
152 cm
152 cm
152.5 cm
Ground Duty Branch
_
_
157.5 cm
Lakshadweep
_
155 cm
155.5 cm
Exceptions for Candidates Based on Region
For Army and Air Force
Height (in cms)
Weight (in kgs)
16-17 Years
17-18 Years
18-19 Years
152
42.5
44.0
45.0
155
43.5
45.3
47.0
157
45.0
47.0
48.0
160
46.0
48.0
49.0
162
48.0
50.0
51.0
165
50.0
52.0
53.0
167
51.0
53.0
54.0
170
52.5
55.0
56.0
173
54.5
57.0
58.0
175
56.0
59.0
60.0
178
58.0
61.0
62.0
180
60.0
63.0
64.5
183
62.5
65.0
66.5
For Navy
Height (in cms)
Weight (in kgs)
16 Years
18 Years
20 Years
152
44
45
46
155
45
46
47
157
46
47
49
160
47
48
50
162
48
50
52
165
50
52
53
167
52
53
55
170
53
55
57
173
55
57
59
175
57
59
61
178
59
61
62
180
61
63
64
183
63
65
67
Sitting Height, Leg Length and Thigh Length in Air Force for Both Male and Female Candidates
Height Requirements
Minimum
Maximum
Sitting eight
81.5 cm
96.0 cm
Leg Length
99.0 cm
120.0 cm
Thigh Length
Maximum- 64.0 cm
As we have discussed the minimum eligibility criteria for the NDA exam. Now we need to find the best way to prepare for the UPSC NDA exam. The NDA exam is conducted in offline mode but the process of application is completely online. Major Kalshi Classes will help you fulfil the dream of getting the uniform and a chance to serve the nation. 
MKC is the best NDA coaching in India, with its main centre in Allahabad. They have the most authentic study material and an atmosphere that motivates the students to live a life less ordinary. Join Today Major Kalshi Classes - the best defence coaching in India. Some of its features include:
Experienced Faculty
Comprehensive Study Material
Mess and Accommodation Facility
Physical Training and GTO Ground
Doubt Counter Facility
Spoken English Classes by Swiss School
Major Kalshi Health Care Centre
SSB Mock Interview
Both Online and Offline Courses
Attractive Scholarships up to 50 %
Weekly test Series
Unique Teaching Plan
14-Day SSB Training programmes
Special Current Affairs Sessions
Dedicated MKC Learning App
Computer Labs for practising for CBT (Computer Based Tests)
Motivational Sessions by Our Academic Director
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kidswing · 2 years ago
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Buy Activity Kits Delivery For Kids to Engage your Kids
Class 1 is the beginners’ stage of learning new things and developing new literacy skills of young learners. In 1st Standard, they take their very first step towards their elementary school education. In this article, we shall discuss in detail about what to Buy Activity Kits for Kids Online India in their first year i.e. Class 1 of primary school. 
As per the Class 1 syllabus, kids are introduced to study Activity Boxes for Kids in Standard 1. Typically, Class 1 is the first grade which follows after kindergarten in elementary school. A child studying in this grade is usually 6-7 years old. Here’s a list of special resources that BYJU’S offers for Class 1 kids.
Alphabetical Wheel- Activity Box-
This box helps in enhancing vocabulary skills in children. This box is for age group 2+. It covers 26 wheels of alphabet A-Z. Each wheel of     alphabet activity for toddlers covers 6 pictures of the same thereby enhancing vocabulary skills in a child.
Animal box - Activity box - Age 1+ -
Is your kid excited about animals? Want to teach their babies , what they eat , where they live and so much more about them. This box is just right for your little one. Don't miss this animal kingdom for kids box for 1+ old kids.
English Family- Activity Box-
If you want to introduce 3 letter words to a child, this box will quench your thirst. This is a box is for the age group 5+. It has 10 different sheets covering all three-letter word families there by enhancing so much vocabulary and thinking ability in a child.
Math champion(6-8) years-
This box covers major concept of maths in a fun learning way. Teaching of clock, 3D shapes, Tables or multiplication chart, Go fish game teaching place values and so much more.
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looneymooney · 3 years ago
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a little push
neil perry x fem reader
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"he's staring again" charlie shoved todd and tilted his head towards neil. neil was fixated on her. the only girl in their literature class. y/n. he never flat out said the words, but all the poets knew he had feelings for her. she made him act like an idiot even with a simple glance. she turned him into putty.
"its been 2 months since she enrolled, its getting kinda pathetic." knox leaned in, grabbing cards out of the pile on the table.
"we should help him out" todd said, glancing back at neil.
"and how do you suggest we do that?" pitts reached out and grabbed his drink, then handed cameron a card
"we intervene." charlie smirked, dropping his cards. "come here, huddle up. ill explain."
-
it was 6:30 and the boys were gathered in the common room doing their respective activities. todd was studying, bouncing his leg. charlie was drawing a battle scene between aliens and cowboys. meeks and pitts were working on their transmitter. knox was boring cameron by talking about his ploys towards chris. and across the room y/n was reading a book whilst sprawled out across a chair. then in came neil.
charlie looked up at todd and raised his eyebrows.
" hey neil, can you come over here a minute" todd breathed out, he was very noticeably nervous but in a way it was working to his advantage.
"hey bud, whats up? need help with your math?" neil asked, pulling out the chair next to todd.
"well actually, i was hoping i could have your help with something else?" his eyes darted before meeting neils.
"anything, what is it?"
"well theres this girl..."
"MY LITTLE TODDY HAS A CRUSH!?" neils eyes lit up, he seemed super energetic and bouncy
"shh!!!" todd pulled neil down and covered his mouth
"well spit it out, who is the lucky girl who caught your eye?" neil playfully shoved todds arm earning a smile from him.
"its the girl from keating's class. y/n. have you met her yet?" todd noticed a slight shift in neils face, but he fixed it in a moments time.
"yeahh yeah, shes really nice. good for you man, what is it exactly you needed my help with?" neil could sense it but he was praying that todd wasnt about to ask him what he though he was.
"well actually i was hoping you could go talk to her for me, yknow get a feel for her. see if shes single, if shes even looking. i dont want to talk to her until i know if its even worth it." annnd, there it is. neil was clenching his fist under the table, he had newly formed crescent moons in his palms.
"id be happy to, next time i see her ill talk to her." neil smiled trying his hardest to keep his cool.
"shes there now. i really appreciate it neil." todd looked to her, giving him an encouraging smile.
"she sure is. ill be right back." he stood up, and turned towards you. his heart was pounding so loud. the world was quiet, his love for you was all he could hear. but he couldn't think about it. todd likes you, so he cant. he kicked himself for not making a move faster.
"well ive gotta say you have amazing taste." he said nodding towards your book
"ah yes, pygmalion. a classic. who doesnt love to read about financial corruption."
'she, shes funny.' he thought, a huge dumbfounded smile on his face.
"im neil perry" and extends his arm to her.
"y/n, its nice to meet you neil." she smiled warmly
'god shes adorable'
"not that im not enjoying your hovering, but would you like to have a seat? we can talk some more if youd like"
his heart sped up, as if it were possible.
"ye yeah id love to." he stumbled over his foot on his way to the couch next to her.
they talked for about an hour, he laughed with her more than he has the rest of the year combined. they worked so well together, the conversation never felt forced or difficult. it was just, easy. he was more in love with her now than he was before, unbeknownst to him she felt the exact same intense emotions for him. before they knew it it was curfew time, so they parted ways, "i look forward to seeing you again, neil." she smiled, leaving him weak at the knees. and with that, she was gone.
he felt like he was floating, he had had the most amazing night. her smile was the most beautiful thing he'd ever seen, and her laugh. god dont get him started. and the way she scrunches her nose when shes embarrassed about something, she was everything.
he swung his dorm door open and threw his bag onto the bed. it was then he was faced with the crushing realization that was todd sitting on his bed. 'my best friend is in love with her. hes in love with her so i cant be.' he felt small.
"hey neil, howd it go?" neil swears hes never todd smile so big.
"it was great. shes hilarious. you two are gonna get along great." neil turned his face away from todd because he couldn't force himself to fake a smile anymore.
todd laughed, moving over to sit at his desk. "neil dude, for someone with such a high gpa you're really taking a long time to figure it out."
"what do you mean?" neil darted his head towards him. "whats there to figure out?"
"it was charlies idea, but we knew you werent gonna talk to her by yourself. not without a little push. so i pushed you" todd was grinning so widely, amused by neils confusion.
when neil finally reached the conclusion, he was a smiling idiot. he spun around and jumped on todds bed, "YOU SNEAKY BASTARD" todd erupted in laughter. "to you, im forever grateful" neil said, bowing, tipping an imaginary hat. "shut up" they laughed.
the next morning neil received pats on the back, and a few on the butt, complements of the dead poets. they all walked in the dining hall for breakfast when they saw you sitting there, reading.
"if you'll excuse me boys," neil smiled heading towards you.
"mind if i?" neil asked smiling, "mm yes! i read those poems you told me about last night. theyre genius." she smiled at him, they began to talk about any and everything. and a few days later they began dating. neil played it off as a joke but he really would always be grateful for what the poets did for him and y/n. they helped him get the girl who would save him.
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luckyasfuck · 4 years ago
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maybe i just wanna be yours [k. bakugou]
A CAMBOY AU SERIES - PARTS 1, 2, 3, 4, [5]
pairing // katsuki x female reader
tw // cussing, smut
warnings for this part // oral (m and f recieving), hair pulling, face-fucking, exhibitionist kink, spanking, praise, dacryphilia
theme // enemies to lovers au, camboy!katsu au, college student!katsu and reader au, no quirk au
keys // y/n
words // 1.8k
a/n // IM SORRY IT TOOK SO LONG I DONT DESERVE YALL. pt 6 at 250 likes and 20 reblogs btw!
previous part
y/n has been alone in the library for about an hour now. she didn’t notice katsuki’s absence until she had to change subjects to study, too indulged in the textbook to look up. no messages were given by katsuki about him being late and she grumbled, rolling her eyes. she writes the name of the textbook on top of the page in her notebook and the library door swings open. 
a calm katsuki walks towards her, ash blonde hair kinda messy and his black hoodie all over the place. with an eyeroll, y/n went back to writing on her notebook while handing the textbook she just used to him. “you’re la-”
“why’d you block me?”
the sentence made the girl look at him with a glare. her hand stops writing, her body stiffens and her hands start to sweat. “what the fuck are you talking about?” she avoids his strong gaze, looking back down on her notebook. katsuki fumes at this, pulling out his phone as she started to write again.
the notebook is closed harshly, a phone being slammed down on it as it displayed her account and the block message. she looked up at the fuming boy as he gripped his phone tight, gazing down at her. “none of your fucking business.” she replied, putting the cap on her ballpoint pen. about to glare at him again, a gasp erupts from her throat when he grips the collar of her shirt, pulling her towards him.
“why’d you block me?” katsuki’s breath fanned right on her lips, his eyes locked right into hers. she sends a death glare his way, grabbing his wrist and detaching it from her collar. “it was the right thing to do and you know it.” the blonde rolled his eyes as y/n dusted her shirt off, fixing her collar. “great, now it’s loose.”
heavy steps make the h/c turn her head to the sound, only to be grabbed by the shoulders and sat down harshly. katsuki towered over her, “unblock me now.” 
“i see no reason to.” stray students walked inside the library and y/n is quick to shove katsuki away from her, they chatter and sit on a table near the front. they don’t acknowledge the two students who were here before them as they laughed loudly. 
y/n sighs, mood completely ruined by the dumb blonde and class skippers. speaking of the dumb blonde, he eyes the students as well, dragging a chair and sitting down beside y/n right before she got up to return the textbook. vermillion eyes stare right into her ass before they’re torn away by her voice, “go get a fucking textbook.” 
the math section is where it all goes downhill.
hands show up either side of y/n as she’s reading through the contents of the math book. about to turn around, she stiffens when a warm, sculpted body presses up against her back. 
katsuki’s crotch brushes up against her rump, his pecs right against her back. “what the fuck are you doing?” the pressed up girl returns the textbook to its original place, trying to even out her breaths. the blonde moves back a little, a hand gripping y/n’s shoulders to turn her around. “will you stop pushing me around?! you- mhmp!” 
a pair of lips slams against hers mid-sentence, a tongue instantly prodding against her lips asking for entrance. the hands encaging her roam her body, one staying put on her hips. “don’t you ever shut the fuck up?” katsuki slurred against her lips as y/n put her hands on his chest, “says you.” 
the next thing the blonde knows, he’s pinned to a shelf. the shelf falters slightly but this doesn’t bother y/n, instead she presses herself against him while connecting their lips once again. 
now that was definitely unexpected. 
“you want it or nah?” katsuki pulls away, hands disappearing underneath her shirt. “i’m afraid you’ll be too loud.” he smirked, groping her left boob. “me? too loud?” y/n tilts her head to the side, her hand traveling downwards to squeeze the males evident bulge, making him whine out quietly. “says you.”
“i’ve watched enough of your stupid lives to know how loud you can be.” the students chatter loudly in the distance, making the both of them aware of their presence. for some reason, the librarian wasn’t here to check up on the shelves every now and then. perfect, y/n thought as she got on her knees, grazing her fingernails along the side of katsuki’s bulge. his cock twitches under her palm as he covers his mouth, breathing heavily. 
his cock was pretty. of course, she’d seen it on multiple lives, but seeing it right infront of her, his pink tip leaking and his veins throbbing. it hit different. without warning, her lips encage his cock head, licking at his the pre-cum dripping down his slit. a beautiful moan escapes from katsuki’s parted lips as he threw his head back onto the shelf filled with books. chatter and footsteps approach the both of them, growing louder by the second. 
“hey, sto-” katsuki warns, trying to push the girl away from his cock. the students walk to the section of shelves right behind them, laughing about getting a book named whatever that was. ignoring the statement, y/n pushes his cock deeper into his mouth, hollowing her cheeks and swirling her tongue around. the weight of it felt amazing against her tongue as she slowly fit all of him in, struggling and gagging. she pulls away, a thin string of saliva connects her to his cock. 
“oh don’t stop now.” katsuki glared, grabbing the back of her head and pushing her back. “fucking suck it, so these students right behind us knows whose cock you’re choking on, yeah? it’s my cock.” for reasons unknown, the students behind them didn’t hear a thing, probably too busy being idiots. y/n only nods, continuing her job, stroking the places she can’t reach. “poor girl, you need help?” 
a harsh grip on her hair and she gags audibly again, hoping the idiots behind katsuki didn’t hear it. slowly, he started fucking himself with her mouth, admiring the way she looked up at him, saliva drooling down her jaw and onto the floor. the tip of his cock hits the back of his throat and he groans. “did you hear that?” a slightly muffled voice asks and the laughter and noise ceases. y/n and katsuki’s hearts drop, but she can’t stop now, could she?
with a faster pace, she starts sucking again, looking up at katsuki with a smirk. “we should go check.” they hear and y/n’s heart pace picks up, licking at the prominent vein of the blonde’s cock. “fucking filthy exhibitionist.” he mouths as the group of students start to investigate. right about to catch the dirty doings of the duo, they’re called by the remnants of their friend group to go get food. “too bad,” he threw his head back, hard footsteps and chatter slowly disappearing in the distance until the library door finally closes, leaving the room silent. “they didn’t see me fill your throat with cum.” he says, finally shooting his load into your mouth. 
the library consists now of katsuki’s moans and y/n audibly gagging here and there. “your turn.” the next thing she knew, she was bent over the desk they were studying at. “we were supposed to study, weren’t we? okay.” he let out a deep chuckle, opening the textbook she used to study. “page 357, what is knowledge?” the cold breeze of the air-conditioned library made her shiver as he hoisted her skirt up, groping her ass and thumbing her clit. “i... i haven’t gotten to that page ye-”
spank.
“ow, fuck!” the slap stung, and katsuki chuckled, kneading her ass cheek with the same hand he used to spank it. a thumb grazing the wet patch in her panties. “page 17, what is psychology?” y/n gulps, legs quivering. “scientific study of... of mental process and behavior...” the tension is thick when he doesn’t speak, she tries to look back at him to see what he’s doing only to be cut off by a moan when one of his fingers dig inside her, slowly moving in and out. “the more correct answers you give, the faster i go. the more wrong answers you give, the slower i go. understood?”
“u-understood.”
“page 137, when was behaviorism introduced?” fuck, y/n didn’t like numbers. katsuki stops moving his fingers and she whines, trying to pry her brain for the answer. “1913...?” a sigh leaves her lips when he starts moving again, a little faster now. “good girl.” this went on for ten more questions, her ass stinging, legs giving up, and tears rolling down onto the table. she had already cum twice, mind becoming hazier and hazier with each question. “that’s it baby, one more question. page 270, which theory of abnormal behavior stresses the importance of current experiences and the persons view of themselves?”
y/n felt his cock prodding at her entrance and she whines, thrusting back to try and get it inside of her. katsuki puts the book down, gripping her hips and pinning her wrists above her head. “nope, answer the question first.” he teases, rubbing her slit up and down with his cock. “existential theories.” she answered proudly, a small oh, yes leaving her lips when he slowly bottoms out inside of her. “good girl, you like being fucked out here? when anyone can walk in and see you?” 
the size of his cock was amazing, it felt amazing. the females eyes lull shut, gripping down at the table with her fingers as katsuki picked up his pace, heavy balls slapping her clit with each thrust. y/n can only nod, face contorting in pleasure as skin slapping, her whines and his grunts bounced off the four walls of the library. “good girl.” he says for the millionth time, bending over to give her shoulder blade a kiss. “fuck! g-gonna cum again!” she warns, legs shaking and sobs leaving her lips. 
“so pretty when you cry,” katsuki whines out, thrusts growing sloppier and faster. “so. fucking. p-pretty.” a loud moan escapes both of their lips and his hips stutter, shooting his load inside her. he thrusts a few more times, prolonging their orgasm. soon, he pulls out and they’re both panting. with a swift movement, he spanks her ass one last time before pulling her panties up, keeping his cum inside. 
y/n is still fucked out, drool and tears all over her face as she got up from the table. katsuki grabs a chair and moves it to her, slowly sitting her down. “you hurt anywhere?” he tried to act cool while snatching her phone, offering her his jug. “fuck off, i see you taking my phone. unblock yourself if you want, i don’t plan on watching your stupid lives anyway.” she choked out, wiping the thin layer of sweat on her forehead. katsuki rolls his eyes at this, unblocking himself and unfollowing all the other camboys you had. 
“we’ll see about that, pretty face.”
next part [ not yet available! ]
taglist
@princesspeach-00 @tamakisropebunny @bakugous-mamas @ll379333 @j1-914 @gazelle-des-pres @trashpandainahat @dickinson-67 @victoriaestein @graybabyxx @apex-legends-dreams @bokuwhorez @karicho @marinwestward @fondontinta @ambi0311 @aghase-nct91312 @toxicempath @katsukichu 
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mxtcha-tea · 4 years ago
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domestic shiratorizawa
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⊹summary; the life inside the dorms of shiratorizawa
⊹pilots; gn![y/n], ushijima, tendou, semi, yamagata, reon, kawanishi, shirabu, goshiki (pairings showed; yamagata x reader, goshiki x reader)
⊹genre; fluff, crack and some cursings (no proofread)
⊹flight details; i've once made a domestic imagines in my old blog so imma make a small reboot of it <3
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random shopping
normal day, normal life. you could've seen yourself laying or even napping in your room while a compilation of minecraft songs plays in the background. but no. instead, you're inside an antique shop with Yamagata, Ushijima and Tendou.
you have no idea when, or how did the process happened but you surely is done with getting dragged inside the shop by Tendou and Yamagata.
while Ushijima's stuck on a section, you don't know where, but he's definitely stuck there, "[y/n]! look at what i found,"
Yamagata called you as you turned around to see him holding up a pretty heavy doll. you raise your brow, "what the hell is that?" walking towards him and taking a closer look at the object in hand,
"i think it's a, um, i think a matryoska doll? matroyska? is that how you say it?" "why're you asking me, i don't know jack shit about russian stuff,"
"ah you mean, matryoshka doll?" Tendou butted in, startling you two, "it's also called a 'nesting doll' and did you actually know that it was actually originated from china?"
Yamagata's eyes practically sparkled at that with a surprised look, "from china? really?"
you can only roll your eyes, "and how can you even know all that?" Tendou snickered and put on a smug face, "i'm actually very smart, y'know. ya'll just don't know about it," "says the person in class 2,"
"i blame the mathematic old hags for adding letters in math, and the apple that fucking hit my man Isaac," you tsk'ed and walk towards the next section. Yamagata passive aggressively put the matryoshka doll down and follow after you along with Tendou,
"also, we need to find ushijima, i think he's stuck in some section between here...ah there," you stopped walking and turn to your right where you find Ushijima reading a book.
Tendou skipped towards him and smack his shoulder, "you okay, wakatoshi-kun? you sure did took longer to look at the stuff here," while Tendou chats with Ushijima, Yamagata look up at the shelves as something caught his eyes.
he tried to reach it while tip toing but due to his height, he can't reach it. then, he jumped from his spot to grab the object but end up hitting his head onto the board, "AGH, FUCK!" which causes you all to look at him, watching him hold his head while shivering from the pain,
"are you okay, yamagata?" ushijima ask, putting back the book on the shelves, "yeah, yeah, i'm just tryna get that," he shakes his head before pointing up.
you followed his finger and caught a glimpse of an old polaroid. it's a little bit dusty but other than that, it looks new. Ushijima reached it from his spot and managed to grab it, "here,"
he hands it to Yamagata as he instantly recovered from his recent pain and snatch it from Ushijima's hand, subtly thanking him with a grin, "why do you even need a polaroid?" Tendou asked, leaning his arm over Ushijima's shoulder with one brow up,
"pfft, for journaling of course,"
a gust of wind went through you while staring at him with a poker face, the same with Tendou with a small cat like smile. Ushijima just looked the same,
"okay," "WHAT'S WITH THE TONE??" you blinked and just knit your eyebrows, "i mean, since when you started journaling? you're not even the type of person to do something aesthetic,"
he pouted and just crosses his arms, "so what? that doesn't mean i can't do it, right? have faith in me god darn it. and honestly, my journal looks good so far," "well, fine,"
you waved your hand at him and continue going through the other section. and just like that, "hey wait!" Yamagata tailed after you.
Tendou snickered at the two and focus back on Ushijima, who's still watching the display yet again, "have you thought of what to buy wakatoshi-kun?" "i'm not sure, there's a lot of interesting stuff here," "well, you've only been in this section but okay~"
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studying
"agh, why did those idiots really have to call me at this time...?"
you groaned, slowly walking through the halls with a slouched figure. tracing your fingers along the wall with a dejected look. you're suppose to sleep today.
an hour or two long sleep. it's finally the weekend which means the time for you to sleep all of your problems away. drifting into slumber with fluffy pillows and warm blankets, enjoying your dream as long as you can.
until your ringtone annoyingly rings next to your ear. you answer the call, and again greeted by the most annoying human in the planet,
"[y/n], we need you at the gym right now!"
"huh? oh fuck off Tendou, i need to sleep right now,"
"nuh uh, you can sleep later after you go to the gym,"
"why? are you, i don't know, practicing or something?"
"you have to find out. if you don't move your ass from that bed, we'll send Hayato to wake you up~"
". . ."
and now, you find yourself standing in front of the door of shiratorizawa's volleyball gym. not only that Tendou wakes you up from your sleep, you also had to WALK all the way from your dorm to the gym,
"i'm gonna add more time to their practices after this..."
sliding the door open, you expect them to be doing serves or maybe spikes.
but instead, you're seeing them—as in the 3rd years—all sitting down at the middle of the court, with books around them.
and what's even more confusing is that they somehow managed to bring a table inside. no, not the flip-able table.
literally a whole ass table.
Reon looks up from his book and notices your figure standing on the door way. he waves his hand at you, you did the same but still with a confused look.
Yamagata was next to see you as he abruptly stand up from his spot, shaking the table in the process,
"Hayato! stop shaking the table," "oops, sorry. ah, wait, [y/n]!"
that caught all of the boys attention as they look at you, "what taking you so long to arrive?" Tendou asked, a pen rested in between his upper lip and nose.
Semi smacked him in the face—earning an 'ow'—before shaking his head,
"their dorm is literally far from the gym, and why do you even proposed your idea of studying at the gym anyway?"
you make your way towards them, Reon patting the empty spot next to him. you sat down on your spot as Yamagata did the same. seemed like he was waiting for you.
Tendou rubbed his nose and pouted at Semi, "this was the best place to study anyway! it have much more room,"
"we should've gone to the cafeteria OR the LIBRARY," Semi groaned, looking back at his book before writing on it,
"pfft, the cafeteria's no fun. and i got banned from the library," Reon looks at Tendou with confusion, "well, it's not surprising,"
Tendou shrugged, "i was also banned from the library," Ushijima said, not looking up from his notes as you knit your eyebrows at that,
"you're also banned from the library? Satori, what did you and Ushijima did—" "anyways, um,"
he cut you off, fidgeting with his pen before pointing it at you, "right, you need to tutor us on this subject~!"
you blinked, looking down at the book they're studying about, "haven't the teacher covered this already?"
"well, i'm sorry, class 6. but we have no idea how this thing works. maybe only Reon, but look at Semi,"
Tendou wrapped his arm around Semi's neck, practically head locking him, "he's from class 1 and i think you should teach him about this the most," "I'll rip your fucking head off, Tendou!"
while both of them tried to strangle each other, Yamagata caught your attention next,
"and also, it won't be fun without you, y'know," Reon nodded, "and don't forget that you can't leave me alone in this,"
"oh right," "hm? what was that?" Yamagata asked. you just shake your head with a defeated smile, "nothing..."
after clearing your throat, you snatched Semi's book away before flipping through the pages,
"okay you scumbags, it's time to learn,"
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oblivious enough
the birds chirped from the tree, the hallway's as loud as ever. Semi and Tendou's leaning against the window, each of them drinking apple juice and eating yakisoba bread.
it was silence between them before Semi spoke, "hey, Tendou," "yes Semi-Semi?" "y'know,"
Semi turned his head to look at Tendou as the redhead did the same, "have you, noticed the relationship between [y/n] and Yamagata lately?"
the latter made a thinking face, before nodding, "hm, seems so,"
"do you think, either one of them ever noticed about it?" Tendou shakes his head at the question, "nope, i don't think they do. in fact, they might be completely oblivious to it,"
Semi snickered, "right, like that one time..."
"[y/n], do you think my lips are dry right now?"
you look up from your clipboard, seeing Yamagata pointing his lips, "hm, nah. they're fine, but if you want, i can but on some lip balm,"
his eyes sparkled at that as he nodded his head with excitement, "sure!" you walk towards your bag with Yamagata following you. opening the zipper and search inside it, you pull out your lip balm,
"here, hold still," you put a hand on his cheek while the other applies lip balm onto his lips. it was a slow process but he managed to not move at all while making eye contact with you.
once you finished applying, he pop his lips before humming, "mn, cherry," "let me know if you need anything else,"
he nodded with now flushed cheeks as he smile at you. you did the same, gently patting his arm.
from a distance, Shirabu looks at them with a disgusted look, "ugh, can't they be more subtle about it,"
Kawanishi shrugged, "just let them be,"
"how can i redo my memory? i don't need to see that this early," "well, what if it was us?" "i would be twice as grossed, i can put my own lip balm," "hm yeah, you're right, i honestly would be like that too," "good,"
"haha yeah, now that i think about it, they do it all the time right?" Tendou nodded at Semi's statement before hearing the all too familiar voice just a few meters away from them,
"[y/n]!"
you turned your head around while still sipping your drink. Yamagata stood in front of you, holding out his visibly crumpled necktie with a small smile,
"my necktie!" "ah again? whatever," you give your drink to him as he hold it for you.
grabbing the necktie from his hand, looping it around his collar shirt and started tying it with a concentrated look,
"i can't say that it'll be clean when i finished tying it," "it's okay! that's why i'm asking you to do it, messy or not, at least i have it on," "hm, yeah,"
after you finished tying it and patting it a little, Yamagata hugged you, "thank you!" "yeah, you're welcome,"
the aura literally radiates on the slightly crowded hallway as some of the students who passed you talked among themselves.
Semi and Tendou stared at you two, expressionless eyes but with a small smile,
'ah, right,'
Tendou sighed, intertwining his fingers together and lifting it up to his cheeks, "ah, young love~"
"we're all the same age,"
"young love~"
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bonus; reliable kouhai
lifeless.
is what goshiki would say when he took a few glances at you from his book. you promised to tutor him about this subject he's struggling on. but didn't really expect to see your slouched form walking inside the library.
he's not even sure if you even hear anything you're saying right now, "get a shovel and two-" your head hit the table, creating a loud sound and catching the attention of almost everyone inside the library,
"[y/n]-senpai, um, are you okay??" you groaned and rapidly blink your eyes, covering your forehead, "yeah, 'm just..."
a yawn escaped from your mouth before you can even finish your sentence, "...tired. those stupid senpais of yours need help tutoring too even tho being grown ass men,"
goshiki closes his book and creating a small 'thump', snapping you out from your mind,
"well, if that so then you didn't have to come, you could've just tell me and i would be fine with it!" your hoarse laugh caught him off guard as a shade of red ran across his cheeks, "i can't break a promise, tsutomu. why do you even think i agree on tutoring you?"
"uh, cause you want to help me with my studies?" "one of it, and cause i enjoy tutoring you," he can feel his cheeks heating up more when you made eye contact with him, a small smile laced upon your face,
"and honestly, you're smarter than i thought. class 4 right? that's cool," he looked away, trying to calm his nerves down, "t-thanks! a lot of people thought i was in a lower class, so i, i appreciate it,"
goshiki took a peek at you, now burying your face onto your face, "also, senpai," "hm?"
"you should take a nap for now, i think i can start understanding this formula," you slightly look up at him, "you sure? i was prolly talking craps just now," "yeah! your health is more important anyway,"
you hum, offering him a warm smile, "thanks, i know i can count on you," you rested onto your side and close your eyes. lips slightly parted and just like that, you're deep in your dreams.
he pursed his lips, slowly leaning against the table to look at your face. it's calm, peaceful and beautiful, kissable lips. he wonder if he could lean in a little closer until you two-
goshiki instantly jolted up and hit himself on the head, face's covered in the color red, 'no! don't think about that, curse you Tendou-San for introducing me to those mangas...'
Tendou's faces ran across his mind as he grunted,
'why're they so pretty??'
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moon-light-jukebox · 4 years ago
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“If you want me to, I will.” [Hotch x Reader]
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masterlist
Summary: Reader has worked for Aaron Hotchner for the past 6 months as the babysitter to his son, Jack.
Pairing: Hotch x (Female) Reader
Word Count: 7.4k – she thicc
Category: Smut/Fluff…and some angst because of who I am as a person.
Content Warning:
A/n: We all know that Hotch’s favorite album is the Beatles "White Album." And I have odd choices for songs that I use as lullabies. This idea came into my head and never left. This video of Billie Eillish singing part of the song is the closest to the structure of how I imagined it. Okay, okay, look, I know Roy wasn’t diagnosed until season 10. But I am taking creative liberties because I needed Jack to be younger.
Meaning this would be set around season 7. Hotch would be about 41, Jack is around 7; so, I made Reader around 26, giving them a 15-year age gap. Please don’t check my math. 😌
y/n = your name. y/l/n = your last name. italicized texts are Reader’s thoughts.
-- If you want me to, I will. --
I was disoriented when I woke up. This isn’t my bed, I thought groggily. Wait…this isn’t even my house.
“Y/n,” a deep voice rumbled beside me.
I jackknifed up into a sitting position, eyes wide and my face flushed with embarrassment. “Mr. Hotchner!” I quickly brought my hand up to my cheek to make sure I hadn’t drooled in my sleep. Because that would really be the cherry on top of my embarrassment. “I’m so sorry! I didn’t mean to fall asleep. This is so embarrassing.”
Mr. Hotchner had been crouched down, putting himself level with his living room couch; the same couch he came home and found me sleeping on. In all the months I’d worked for the Hotchner/Brooks family, I’d never seen Mr. Hotchner smile anytime he wasn’t talking to his son, Jack. He always looked incredibly serious and sometimes incredibly sad; but the normal scowl was missing from his face as he looked at me, I noticed, watching him rise to a standing position.
“It’s fine, y/n. It’s after 1 o’clock in the morning.” He shifted, turning to go open the gun safe he kept in the part of the living room where his desk sat. Mr. Hotchner, or Hotch, as he kept telling me to call him, was the Unit Chief of the Behavioral Analysis Unit with the FBI. Which was just a very fancy way of saying he was a profiler that was in charge of all the other profilers. Some people just look like the jobs they have; Mr. Hotchner was one of those people. “Thank you for staying late, I didn’t think things were going to run this long. I didn’t even know you were here until I called Jessica a few hours ago.”
“Oh, right,” I mumbled as I began to gather my things from the coffee table and put them into my bag. “She called me a little after 4; something happened with her dad, I think.” I zipped my bag shut, standing up quickly. “I didn’t mind helping out, Mr. Hotchner.”
He made a sound that was almost a chuckle. “You don’t have to call me Mr. Hotchner, y/n. I know I’m a lot older than you, but that makes me feel ancient.”
“You’re not that much older than me,” I protested.
He looked incredulous. “Y/n, you’re still in college.”
Well, that stings a bit. “I’m in graduate school,” I said, my voice dampening a little bit. “I’m almost 27.”
Mr. Hotchner blinked at me. “Really? I thought you were younger than that…”
“My age didn’t come up in the numerous background checks you did on me?” I scoffed, immediately wincing as the words flew out of my mouth. “Oh my god, I just keep making this worse.” I slung my bag over my shoulder. “I’m sorry, Mr. Hotchner. For falling asleep on your couch…and for every moment after that. I’ll just go now.”
"Y/n," he called. "hang on, it's really late, and…I still need to pay you."
Jesus. “It is late, Mr. Hotchner, that’s why I need to head home.” I forced an awkward laugh. “I have class at 9 am.”
He pushed his hands into his pockets, regarding me in a way that made me squirm. I wasn’t used to a person paying attention to me the way Mr. Hotchner did. It didn’t make me uneasy; I just felt like I couldn’t hide anything from him…which made me uneasy. “What classes are you taking this semester?”
I don’t know why it stung so much that he knew virtually nothing about me. I’d worked for him for 6 months; he wasn’t obligated to know anything about me other than how I took care of his son. “I’m actually done with my course work this semester,” I mumbled. “I’m a TA…in a class that starts at 9 am.” It doesn’t matter, you’re just tired. “You-you can just pay me for tonight the next time I’m over. It’s not like you’re gonna stiff me.” I walked over to the door and threw a very quick “goodnight, Mr. Hotchner” over my shoulder before I scurried out.
I missed the quiet “Aaron. You can call me Aaron.”
--
The entire drive home, my thoughts were on Aaron Hotchner. None of this was what I expected when I took this job. I had been in graduate school for 2 years now. I had already gotten my master’s degree and had been accepted into the Ph.D. program. There are many branches of psychology, but I had always been fascinated with cognitive psychology; it seemed only natural that that is what I would pursue in graduate school. Once it became time to focus my interest in preparation for my dissertation, I decided to study the cognitive decay in Alzheimer's patients. We knew that they lost memories, but I wanted to explore how their basic cognitive functions were affected in certain settings.
As part of my program, I was a TA in an intro psych class, and I conducted my research at the hospital connected to the university. That’s where I first met Jessica Brooks. Despite getting a stipend for my teaching assistant work, I had been taking odd jobs to help make ends meet; D.C. wasn't cheap. When I mentioned that I had experience with kids, Jessica had immediately told me that she was needing help caring for her nephew in the wake of her father, Roy's diagnosis. She wanted to keep him at home, which was both admirable and time-consuming.
I wasn’t prepared for the gigantic background check that I was subjected to. I very quickly learned that my potential employer had some power at the FBI. Jessica had raved to him about me, so he agreed to meet with me. When Jessica told me he worked for the FBI, I was expecting a bureaucrat, kind of short, receding hairline, soft from sitting behind a desk all day.
Aaron Hotchner was none of those things. He was a total cliché; he was tall, dark, and handsome. His eyes were such a deep brown they were almost black, his hair was black, and he towered over me. His hand was firm when he shook mine. I initially thought he didn’t like me because of the scowl he wore on his face; now I knew that was just his default expression. I’m pretty sure he invented Resting Bitch Face. I think it was my meeting with Jack that sealed the deal. We had clicked right away. The 7-year-old was impressed by my knowledge of both DC and Marvel comics. I could still remember our first meeting so clearly; when in a move that I now know is so much like his father, he had asked me an interview question of his own.
“What is Spiderman’s middle name?” the boy had asked with a suspicious squint of his eyes.
This kid is poser checking me, I had thought with amusement. “That would depend on which Spiderman you’re referring to. Assuming it’s Peter Parker, his middle name is Benjamin.”
We were best friends after that.
I loved Jack; I really did. And I was paid well enough that he was the only child I babysat for, the rest of my time spent working on my research and plotting my dissertation. It was clear that Aaron Hotchner loved his son, and he felt guilty for not being around more. He was fierce and intimidating any other time, but once he was with his son, his entire face would transform. His smiles came easier, his eyes twinkled, and he didn’t seem so scary anymore.
None of that is why he made me nervous, though. What made me so nervous is the fear that one day I was going to spend enough time with him for him to see the feelings I had so stupidly developed for him.  
--
The very next night, I was hiding in the kitchen floor in Aaron Hotchner’s apartment.
“Ready or not, here I come!” the little voice called out before his feet started stomping loudly across the floor.
From my position behind the kitchen counter, I tried very hard to remain silent, despite my amusement. Jack Hotchner was many wonderful, wonderful things. Sneaky was not one of them. Which is why I wasn’t surprised when I heard his little feet hurry towards me, and I didn’t lose my balance when he turned the corner and launched himself at me. “Oomph!” was the only reasonable sound to make when a tiny human slammed into you.
Jack was delighted. “I FOUND YOU!”
My response was cut off by the sound of the front door opening. Jack was off me in a flash, barreling towards the living room. “Daddy!”
Mr. Hotchner made a similar “oomph” noise when Jack jumped on him, confirming my theory. I rose to my feet quickly, smoothing down my clothes.
“We were playing hide and seek, Daddy!” Jack informed his father. “I found y/n every time! She never found me once!” His chest puffed out with pride, making my face break into a smile.
“You’re just an excellent hider, Jack-attack.”
Mr. Hotchner’s eyes settled on my face then, for just a moment I saw something so sad in those eyes that the breath seized in my lungs.
He cleared his throat, seeming to shake off whatever he was thinking before smiling at his son. “I’m glad you had a good time with, y/n, buddy.”
Jack nodded vigorously. “I helped make dinner!”
“You did?” He questioned in fake astonishment. “When did you make dinner?”
“Tonight!”
Mr. Hotchner looked at me quizzically. “Oh, um, I wasn’t actually supposed to watch Jack tonight…but Jessica called and asked if I could. It was really last minute, and she’d already bought some stuff to make dinner…” I trailed off. “I hope that’s okay. Jesus Christ, y/n. You’re a 26-year-old woman, get it together.
His attention moved from me to his son. "Jack, go get changed into your pj's. It's almost bedtime." When Jack's mouth opened to protest this great injustice, his father went on. "You can tell y/n bye when you're done."
So much for a speedy escape, I thought. Instead, I just smiled at him. "Yep, I'll be right here, little man." Satisfied with this, Jack jumped out of his father's arms and ran towards his room.
“Why did Jessica need you to come over? Did something happen with Roy?” He looked genuinely worried, walking into the kitchen to stand near me.
I reached out and put a hand on his arm without thinking. "Oh, oh god no, nothing like that." Realizing I was touching him, I snatched my hand back like he'd burned me. "Sorry. She…she-um had a date."
His eyebrows rose so high they almost hit his hairline. “A date?” he asked, disbelief dripping from his words.
I chuckled. “That’s what she told me.”
He walked back into the living room then, leaning back against the couch, crossing his arms over his chest as he focused his dark gaze on me. “What about you?”
“…What about me what?”
“Does Jessica ever have to cover for you when you have dates?”
If Aaron Hotchner hadn’t made me so nervous, I might have picked up on how he phrased that question. As it happens, all I could do was fidget under his gaze. “Oh,” I chuckled nervously. “Ah, no. She doesn’t have to do that. I don’t really date.”
That had one of his eyebrows rising, his arms crossing across his chest. "Why?"
Because I want you to crack my back like a glowstick. “Um…you know, it’s hard to find the time.”
Thankfully Jack chose that moment to come barreling out of his room, charging full force at me. “You’re still here!” he exclaimed.
I smiled down at him when his arms wrapped around my hips. I put one hand on the back of his head, the other on his back, giving him a squeeze. “Of course I am! I couldn’t leave without telling you goodbye.”
“I wish you didn’t have to go,” he mumbled.
My throat worked as a sudden wave of emotion hit me. "Oh, Jack," my voice was thicker than usual when I spoke. "I don't like leaving you either, but you'll see me before you know it. I promise."
Once we had finally pried Jack off me, Mr. Hotchner went to take him to bed. He turned to me when he scooped Jack up in his arms. “Thank you for today.”
“It’s no problem, Mr. Hotchner.”
“You know you don’t have to call me that,” he said, his eyes never leaving mine. “Most people call me Hotch. Or you could call me Aaron.”
I didn't know what to say to that; all I could do was give him an awkward smile. I was gone before he came back into the living room. I didn't want to leave, I never did, but I couldn't risk being alone with…Aaron.
--
The following Thursday night, my phone started ringing just after 11:30. Glancing at it, I saw it was Jessica. “Hey,” I said in greeting.
“Hey, y/n,” she said, sounding frazzled. “I have a huge favor to ask. Dad’s home health nurse had to leave early tonight.” “Is something wrong with Melinda?” I hope not. She’s the sweetest.
“No, I don’t think so. But she needs to go home and there’s no one to sit with Jack. But Aaron isn’t home yet…”
“I’ll be there in 20.”
Which is why I was now in Aaron Hotchner’s apartment after midnight in a pair of shorts that were so short I only ever wore them at home and a t-shirt that I had had for forever. Jessica had sounded so upset when she called, I hadn't even thought to change. She had promised to be back as quick as she could; she said that Mr. Hotchner was flying back from a case, and she didn’t expect him until 5 a.m. at the earliest.
When I first arrived, I had tried to watch TV, my mind too wired to sleep, even though I had class at 9 am in the morning. Sighing, I glanced over at the clock to see it was just after 1:45 in the morning.
“Fuuuuuuck,” I whined out loud. I have to go to sleep; even if it’s just a little nap. I remembered Jessica had left some chamomile tea here for the nights she stayed over to watch Jack. Finding the kettle and the tea itself was no problem; the problem presented itself when I had to get a mug to put the tea in.
I had never considered myself a particularly short person; sure, I had to stretch to get things from time to time, but everybody did that. Looking up into the upper cabinets in the Hotchner house had me reconsidering that. The mugs were on the very top shelf and try as I might, I just couldn’t seem to reach them; my fingers kept grazing over the ceramic.
“Goddamnit,” I mumbled in a huff. What is the point to put mugs way the fuck up there? Some of us are a perfectly normal height…but noooo I have to work for giants. I braced my hands on the countertop as I heaved myself up on to said countertop. Once my knees were in place, I got the offending cup without further problems.
I blame how focused I was on my task for my not hearing the front door open, or the footsteps that followed. Which is why I had a mild heart attack when I heard a voice that sounded highly amused say from behind me, “What are you doing?”
Several things happened all at once, and very quickly. I let out the most embarrassing squeak in all of history, I lost my balance on the counter and the cup fell from my hand. The cup crashed to the floor and shattered. My fate might have been the same but two large hands caught me, gripping my hips from behind. I looked down to see his long fingers wrapping around my waist, gripping me tightly; my difficulty breathing then had nothing to do with how scared I was.  
“I’m sorry,” Aaron said softly, still not releasing me. “I didn’t mean to scare you.”
“No, I get it,” I said lightly, attempting to act like I wasn’t going into cardiac arrest because he was touching me. “You’re a very stealthy FBI agent. It was bound to happen.”
He chuckled before his hands pushed my hips so I was twisting around, my legs shifting until I was sitting on the countertop, staring into the same dark eyes I thought about far too often. They weren’t as harsh as they usually were; tonight, they were soft and warm, and they made my pulse race a bit faster.
I moved to get off the counter when the hands that were still on my hips stopped me. “Hang on, let me clean this up first. I don’t want you to hurt yourself.”
Fantastic, I thought, hiding my face in my hands. It seems I was incapable of not making a fool out of myself in front of this man.
He worked quickly while I debated changing my name and fleeing the country; in the next moment, he was standing in front of me again. "What's wrong?"
“Oh, nothing,” I said, not moving my hands. “Just dying of embarrassment.”
Aaron actually laughed at that, moving closer to stand between my thighs, his hands coming to rest on the countertop on either side of my hips. “Why are you embarrassed?”
I dropped my hands then. “Because this is becoming a pattern! First, I fell asleep on your couch, then I almost fell off your counter and cracked my head like an egg.” I bit my lip, shifting under his gaze. “I’m sorry and thank you for catching me.”
“I didn’t mind,” he said softly.
He still had that soft look on his face, but he was smiling too like he was enjoying my embarrassment. He probably is. I had never been this close to him before. I didn’t know his eyes weren’t just one flat color of brown, but that lighter shades of brown whirled throughout. I had never felt the heat of his body before, but now I was so close I could smell him. Why does he have to smell good? I whined internally. If he just stunk, I could get over this.
This was exactly why I tried very hard to stay as far away from him as possible because I lost the ability to think clearly whenever I was with him. I couldn't stop my eyes from moving down to his lips. I was eye level with him from my position on the counter; all I had to do to brush my lips across his was lean forward, so that’s exactly what I did. His body stiffened slightly at the first touch of my lips to his. I pulled back, ready to apologize when his hand wrapped around the back of my head and pulled me back to him. There was nothing soft about this kiss. His free hand gripped my thigh, my hands held on to his shirt, trying to pull him closer. My tongue brushed against his mouth before he sucked on the tip of it, causing me to shudder. He took a step forward as his tongue twirled around mine. I could feel him when he settled against me; he was hard, and I found myself shifting my hips to rub against him.
The shrill ringing of his phone broke us apart suddenly. He was panting, his cheeks were slightly flushed. I thought I heard him let out a “fuck” under his breath as he reached into his pocket and grabbed his phone.
“Hey Jessica,” he answered.
Now that our moment was broken, I felt very self-conscious. What the fuck did I just do?! He is my boss. He is Jack’s dad. Aaron took a step back and I slid off the counter. This turned out to be a very bad idea on my part; my body brushed down the front of his, causing me to bite my lip to silence the moan that threatened to escape.
“Yeah, I landed a little while ago,” he said as I left the kitchen.
WhatthefuckWhatthefuck. I heard him end the call with Jessica before he quickly walked into the living room. A look of relief washed over his face when he saw me. “I thought you’d try to slip away.”
“I thought about it,” I told him honestly.
“Listen, y/n, about that in the kitchen,” he began.
I held up my hands. “I’m so sorry, Mr. Hotchner. I don’t know why I did that; I didn’t mean to make you uncomfortable.” I was giving him an out because I couldn’t handle hearing the rejection I knew was coming. “I just…I guess we got caught up in the moment? And you’re really tired, I’m sure. I’m so sorry.” I was rambling now. “If you don’t want me to watch Jack anymore-“
“Y/n, no,” he interrupted. “No, this…you’re right, it was just a heat of the moment thing. It happens. I’m sorry I lost myself for a moment.” He cleared his throat, his face still set in softness. “Jack loves you. He doesn’t need to suffer for any more of my mistakes.”
Mistakes. The word hollowed me out and left me cold. I just nodded. “Right,” I said in what I hoped was an even tone. “Just a mistake. I should get going. It’s really late.”
Which is how I found myself driving home at almost 3 in the morning with tears running down my cheeks. A mistake.
--
Things went back to normal after that night. I continued to avoid Aaron Hotchner at all costs and he…did whatever he did. I tried to hide the hurt whenever I did happen to see him, but it was so hard when I could still feel the tingle from his lips on mine.
A few days after the “mistake,” I was babysitting Jack again. He’d went to bed at his normal 8:30 and all was quiet. I decided to do some TA work while I waited for Mr. Hotchner to come home. I was halfway through grading an essay when I heard the first noise come from Jack’s room. Lifting my fingers from the keys of my computer, I waited to see if I heard another sound. I didn’t have to wait long; not even a minute passed before I heard a strained cry. Jumping up, I hurried down the hall to Jack’s bedroom.
Cracking the door open I called, “Jack-attack? Are you okay, little man?” I didn’t see him right away; he had hidden under his covers and curled up into a little ball. “Hey, Jack. It’s just y/n.” I sat down on the edge of his bed. “Do you wanna talk about it?”
I saw the lump under the blankets start to move hesitantly before I saw his brown hair peak out of the blanket near his pillow. His eyes were wide and with the light shining in from the hall, I could see tears gleam in them. “Oh, buddy,” I cooed. “Did you have a bad dream?”
The boy nodded. “Yeah…there was a bad man…and my daddy didn’t come save me.”
I felt my breath seize in my chest. Jessica had told me a brief version of what happened to Jack's mother a few years ago. "Jack, you know your dad would always do whatever he had to do to come to save you." I shifted my position on the bed until I was sitting beside him. "He'd never let anything bad happen to you." Jack started inching closer to me. I held out my arms and smiled when he lunged for me; I wrapped him in a tight hug, rubbing circles on his back.
“My dad just isn’t home a lot anymore. He has a lot of work to do,” he mumbled into my shirt.  
“Your dad would be home if he could, Jack.” I couldn’t quite keep the sadness out of my voice. It wasn’t fair to either Jack or his dad that he had to be away so much.
“I know,” the little boy whispered. “I just miss him sometimes.”
“Do you want to call him?” I offered. “I don’t think he’d mind.”
Jack just shook his head. “No, it’s okay.” He turned his face up to look at me. “Will you stay with me?”
I moved so he lay beside me with my left arm still squeezed around him. “Of course, bud.” I scooted down the bed so I was reclining instead of sitting straight up, pulling the cover-up over him again. "Do you want me to read you another story?"  
He just shuffled under his covers, looking at me with the bashful innocence of childhood. “Can you sing to me until I fall asleep?”
I wasn’t the biggest fan of singing in front of people, but how could I turn this little face down? I just nodded. “Do you have any requests?”
“Nope,” he answered with a little grin on his face.
Unfortunately, at that moment every single lullaby I had ever know left my head. I couldn’t think of a single traditional lullaby. So, I decided to improvise. I started singing slower songs I knew, some of them might not have been appropriate for a 7-year-old’s lullaby, but I don’t think Jack cared that much.
He was almost out, drifting on the edge between deep sleep and awake. My arm was still around his shoulder, he was still snuggled to my side. I decided one more song would be enough, which meant I pulled out my second Beatles song of the night.
“Who knows how long I’ve loved you?
You know I love you still.
Will I wait a lonely lifetime?
If you want me to, I will.
For if I ever saw-“
I glanced up, immediately sensing there was someone else in the room. To my horror, Jack’s father was standing in the doorway, staring at me with an unreadable expression on his face. I swallowed nervously, then I turned to press a kiss against Jack’s soft forehead before I gently detangled myself from him. I straightened my clothes that to my further embarrassment had shifted around because I was laying with a wiggly child, then, attempting to keep my face impassive, I walked to the door, moving around his father as I exited.
Mr. Hotchner walked into the room and checked on his son, while I moved into the living room to gather my things. I wonder if he just left the money by the door, I mused. If he did, I could just make a dash for the door. I mean, if he didn’t, he could always just pay me next time. Sadly, my plans were escape were foiled yet again by the man in question entering the room.
"Sorry," I muttered. "I know he was up past his bedtime. I put him down at 8, but he had a nightmare." I was babbling, not meeting his eyes, my gaze very intently focused on my bag. "He asked me to stay with him until he fell asleep…" I finally looked up, shrugged, and said, "He's very hard to say no to."
“You don’t have to apologize for being nice to my son, y/n,” he said softly. “That’s one of my favorite songs on the White Album, you know.”
I hadn’t known that. “Mr. Hotch-“
He took a step towards me before I finished speaking. “Y/n, please, I can barely handle this as it is. Please call me Aaron.”
I just blinked up at him. “So, ‘Hotch’ is off the table now?”
That had a soft smile curving his lips upward. "That was a limited-time deal. You should have been quicker." I saw his hand rise up slowly, so slowly that I would have had time to move away…but I just couldn’t. He brushed my hair back from my face, his eyes were two pools of black in the dim light, they were swirling with something that made my stomach flutter.
“Aaron,” I breathed, having no idea what I was going to say.
He let out a soft sigh, turning his eyes upwards. When he brought them back down to mine, his hand slid from its place near my ear to cradle the back of my head. His eyes searched mine for a moment before his shoulders dropped slightly. “Fuck it,” he muttered before he leaned down and sealed his lips over mine.
I might have thought this kiss would be questioning or unsure, but there was nothing unsure about it. Aaron kissed me like he was starving for me. His teeth caught my bottom lip and tugged as he pulled away. “It wasn’t a mistake,” he breathed before bringing his lips more firmly against mine.
My hands began to move over his body; one of my hands grabbed his tie and used it to pull him closer to me, the other reached up to brush against the short, soft hair on the back of his neck. “It wasn’t?” I questioned when we broke away for air.
Aaron’s lips moved across my cheek, leaving soft kisses until he reached my ear. “No, sweet girl, it wasn’t.” His mouth moved down to my neck; his kisses turning into bites that were sure to become brushes. I didn’t care, I needed him. My hands moved to his shirt, quickly trying to undo all the buttons.
His hands moved down to the waist of my jeans, deftly flicking the button open before sliding the zipper down. “Is this what you want?” he asked as his hand touched my lower stomach, his fingers brushing over the elastic band of my panties.
“Yes,” I said, still working to free him from his shirt. “I want this so much.”
The fingers of his free hand rose up to tap my chin, forcing my eyes up until I met his gaze. "I want to hear you say my name again." His other hand lifted from my stomach to slide over the flair of my hip until he was gripping my ass. "Whenever I laid in bed that night after I had you pressed against me in my kitchen when I stroked my cock, I thought about you moaning my name.” The hand that was on my chin pulled away, skimming down my body until he was grabbing the other side of my ass. “So, say it. Tell me what you want.”
“I want you, Aaron.” So, so much.
His hands moved to the backs of my thighs, then he lifted me up his body, startling me. Jesus Christ, how strong is this guy? I threw my arms around his neck as he started walking us down towards his bedroom. A giggle escaped my lips. “I could have walked, you know.”
We had already entered his room; he tossed me gently on the bed before he turned to close and lock the door. He walked to stand at the side of his bed, his eyes devouring me. “I couldn’t give you a chance to sneak away again, sweet girl.” Aaron pulled off his tie before he finished unbuttoning his shirt, shedding it on the floor.
Fuck. Fuck, he’s hot. I pulled my own shirt over my head, and his body was on top of me before it even left my hands. Aaron's mouth moved down to my collarbones, his hand slipped behind my back to unhook my bra. Once the straps were down my arms, Aaron lifted himself up on his arms to toss it away, his eyes running over my body. "You're so beautiful," he said softly like it wasn't the sweetest compliment I'd ever been paid. He leaned over again, his lips skimming down to my chest before he wrapped his lips around one of my nipples.
“Fuck, Aaron,” I moaned.
He gave my nipple a flick with his tongue before he lifted his head. “Ssh, sweet girl. You have to be quiet. Can you do that?” He kissed his way over to my other breast. “I can’t do this if you won’t be quiet.”
“I can be quiet,” I whispered right before I bit my lip to smother my moan at the feeling of his mouth on me. “Maybe.”
His breath puffed against my skin when he laughed at me. My hands threaded through his hair when he brought his face back up to mine. My mouth opened eagerly for him, my tongue slicking over his while I tried to grind my body against him. Aaron was smiling when he broke the kiss, shifting up onto his knees. “Well, I appreciate you trying to be quiet at any rate,” he teased.
My response died in my throat when his fingers yanked my jeans off my legs, bringing my panties with them. I was totally bare in front of him. His eyes raked down my body in a way that would make me self-conscious with anyone else. How could I ever be self-conscious with a man who looked at me like I was the most beautiful thing in the world?
But when he started to kiss further down my body, I grabbed his arm, attempting to pull him back up to kiss me. “Aaron,” I whispered.
He pressed a soft kiss to my collarbone. “What’s wrong, beautiful?”
“You don’t…you don’t have to do…that,” I mumbled, feeling my face heat up.
Aaron braced himself on his arms and stared down at me. Enlightenment dawned on his face a second later. He leaned down to kiss me softly. “Do you not want me to?”
I bit my lip, feeling more flustered. “It’s just…I’ve never…and I know that guys don’t really like-.“ My words were cut off when he placed another kiss to my lips, still incredibly soft, but with more force than before.
"If it makes you uncomfortable, I won't," he said quietly. "But I can assure you, I can't think of anything more I'd rather do than lick your pussy until you cum all over my face." He skimmed his lips over my cheek to my ear. "And once you've come down, I want to slide my cock inside you and feel how soft and wet you are." His kisses moved down to my neck, his mouth sucking on my pulse point. "Then I want to fuck you until you're whimpering against my lips to make you cum again.”
I felt my core throb at his words. No one had ever said anything like that to me before. He lifted his gaze when he got back to my breast, flicking my nipple with his tongue. “Is that what you want too, sweet girl?”
I have never wanted anything more, I thought; but I was so far gone that all I could do was nod.
He gave me a soft smile, moving down the bed further to settle between my thighs, pulling them further apart. I felt a kiss pressed to one thigh, then the other. His hot breath washed over the part of me that was already so wet for him. “You’re beautiful here too,” he murmured before he pressed a kiss to my clit. I lifted my hips at the sensation, causing him to chuckle and move his hands to wrap around my thighs, his arms anchoring me in place. A second later I understood why he braced my hips. The second he flattened his tongue and licked the length of my pussy, my hips started moving involuntarily and my fingers tangled in his hair.
I felt a puff of air against me when he laughed again, and it made me smile. I didn’t expect Aaron Hotchner to be fun…or dirty in bed. All thought immediately left my head when he parted me with his tongue, dipping into my entrance before spearing his tongue into me. I felt the vibration when he moaned against me. "You taste so fucking good, y/n," he said, his voice still hushed. Giving my entrance one last lick, he moved up to my clit.
He spent time moving his tongue around me, learning what made me squirm. When he started fluttering his tongue quickly over my clit my hands started tugging on his hair and my thighs tried to snap together.
“Aaron,” I whined, attempting to rock my hips against his mouth.
I think he understood what I needed better than I did. His left hand released my thigh and moved down to my heat, just below his mouth. I felt his fingers brush over me before he pushed on inside me, causing my back to arch off the bed. “Aaron, Aaron, fuck.” He added a second finger, pumping them in a rhythm that complimented the movements of his mouth.
I wasn't prepared for when his lips closed around my clit, sucking lightly, while his fingers started to curl inside of me. “Oh my God," I moaned out, louder than I should have. "Aaron, I'm going to cum." I started pulling on his hair so hard it must have hurt, but he just moaned against me, never slowing his pace. "Aaron, fuck, please. I think…I-I-“
My words broke off as the band inside of me snapped, my pussy clamping down on his fingers and my back arching off of the bed, my mouth hanging open in a silent scream.
Aaron slowed his motions, slowly bringing me through the orgasm and back down to Earth. With one final kiss to my thigh, he rose and moved up my body until his face was hovering over mine. His lips were shiny with my arousal, they also looked a little swollen, but more importantly, they were smirking at me.
I’ll give him that one. Reaching up I cradled his jaw in my hands, bringing his mouth down to mine. I tasted myself on his lips and tongue when he licked into my mouth. Despite the powerful orgasm he had just given me, I was still desperate for him. I broke away from his mouth. “Aaron, I need you.”
He pressed another kiss to my lips before he lifted up and stood at the side of the bed, undoing the buckle of his belt. My eyes were fixed on his movements, watching as he unbuttoned his slacks and slid them down his legs. His cock was a thick pipe outlined in his underwear. He hooked his thumbs into the waistband before he spoke again. "I'll give you everything you need, greedy girl." Aaron pushed his underwear down, his cock springing free before he climbed back on the bed.
He was so much thicker than I expected he would be. I moved my hand down to wrap my fingers around him, pumping his length. He let out a groan and lowered his forehead to mine. “Baby,” he muttered. “I…fuck. I have to get a condom.”
“Aaron,” I whined. “I want to feel you inside me. I’m on birth control. Please?” The thought of anything separating me from this man was abhorrent to me in that moment.
I saw his willpower crumble. “Are you sure?”
So sure. “Please,” I begged lifting my head to kiss him. “I want you to fuck me.”
With a groan that I will remember for the rest of my life, he shifted his hips forwarded, allowing my hands to guide him to my entrance. Aaron kissed me then, slowly and deeply has he started to push inside me. My hand flew away from his cock, both my arms wrapping around his body to pull him closer to me. I felt my nails digging into his back.
Aaron broke our kiss with another soft moan that sounded like my name. “I knew you’d feel like this,” he whispered, pressing deeper inside me. “I knew your pussy would be this fucking tight, this fucking hot, and so fucking soft." He started moving in and out of my pussy, going in a little further each time. “You still have to be quiet, sweet girl.”
“I’m trying,” I moaned, my pussy already starting to flutter around him when he finally pushed all the way inside of me. “Aaron, fucking Christ.” I felt him everywhere, and I somehow still craved more.
He grabbed my thigh, pulling if further up his side, allowing himself to sink deeper inside of me. “I know, sweet girl. I know.” He started a slow pace, pulling almost all the way out of me before slamming back inside me.
My head was thrashing against the pillows, my teeth digging into my bottom lip. “Aaron, I need you to fuck me harder. Please.”
He groaned at my words, placing a sloppy kiss to my mouth before pulling back. He pulled one of my legs up until it was over his shoulder, the other still wrapped around his waist, and then he started to move faster inside of me.
I braced one hand against the headboard as he pounded into me. “Oh my god, Aaron,” my voice was a low whimper as I looked down to see his cock sliding in and out of me. “You feel so fucking good.”
“Baby, I want you to reach down and rub your clit for me while I fuck your tight little pussy.” His pace started to speed up as he spoke. “Can you do that for me?” He groaned when I complied, the stimulation to my clit causing my pussy to flutter around him. “Good girl.”
My fingers began to work frantically. “Don’t stop, Aaron. Don’t stop,” I begged. “I’m so close.”
“I know, sweet girl, I can feel you. Your pussy feels so good squeezing around my cock. You’re going to make me cum.” His thrusts were starting to get choppier, one of his hands braced on the top of the headboard while the other held my leg on his shoulder. “Do you want me to cum inside your pretty pussy, sweet girl?” He groaned loudly when my walls clenched around him. “It feels like you like the idea of that, don’t you baby?”
My fingers continued their pace, my head thrashing, my body trembling. “Yes. Fuck, Aaron. Please cum inside of me. Please.”
Aaron felt it first and acted quickly; his hand moved from my leg to cover my mouth. “That’s it, cum for me, baby.”
I thought my orgasm earlier tonight was powerful. It was nothing compared to how I felt when I came around his cock, only to feel him find his own release a moment after.
“Oh fuck, oh fuck, y/n,” he breathed, giving a last few jerks inside of my body, pushing against the fluttering aftershocks of my orgasm. He rolled off me, careful not to drop all of his weight on top of me. To my relief, he quickly gathered me in his arm, pulling me against his body, pressing a soft kiss to my sweaty forehead.
My ear was pressed against his chest, allowing me to hear his heartbeat slowdown from its frantic pace and his breathing even out. I turned my head and pressed a kiss to his chest while his hand continued to stroke my back.
“That…that was amazing,” I said, looking up at him. “If I knew you had that in you, I wouldn’t have run out of the room every time I was alone with you.”
He laughed softly, his eyes sparkling. “Well, at least you’ll know for next time.”
My thoughts sobered at his words. Next time
“Hey,” he said, his hand cupping the side of my face. “No, don’t go away. I just got you.” He kissed my forehead again, then the tip of my nose, then both of my eyelids, before he tilted my face up further so he could press a kiss to my lips. “We’ll figure this out. We have to. I care too much about you to let you go.”
“I care about you too,” I replied, snuggling against his chest, my eyes suddenly feeling heavy.
I was almost asleep when I heard his voice rumble again. “Will you sing Beatles songs to me when I can’t sleep too?” His voice was sleepy and teasing.
I smiled into the darkness, not bothering to open my eyes. “If you want me to, I will.”
--
Permanent Taglist: @rachelxwayne​ @pinkdiamond1016​ @sickeninglyshoujo @justagirllookingforherplace​ @nanocoool​
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How can I motivate myself to finish school
1. Why do you wish to finish school?
Use that reason and push through, step by step. If you put in more work now you will experience a sense of success as you receive better results. This will fuel your motivation and make it more enjoyable and therefore school itself “easier”.
2. Enjoying it.
Find something enjoyable about the topic that is currently being taught in a class you struggle with and volunteer to give a presentation on that specifically. For example if you struggle with history, but enjoy physics give a presentation on the workings and the development of “Little Boy” and “Fat man” or the “machinery” used to build the pyramids. If you prefer biology, but struggle with maths offer to give a presentation on exponential functions using the example of bacterial growth. Most people are naturally curious about something and if you manage to transfer your curiosity to a subject that is otherwise difficult it will become easier to invest time.
3. Yet.
Do not allow yourself to say or even think “I suck at this”, “I can’t do this”, especially when it comes to entire subjects. Sometimes you will need more time to learn something, others will struggle in different areas, but it is more of a matter of “I can’t do this, yet” unless you give up.
4. Distractions.
It is often that other things seem more important or at least more enjoyable and while indulgance to a certain degree is healthy especially as a child/teenager, “social obligations” created by friends or romantic partners are less important at this stage of your development. It is likely that if people insist you prioritise them, that they do not have your best future interest in mind and you will suffer no long term loss from losing their “friendship”/“partnership”. However, in general it is best to turn distractions into rewards. If you wish to play a new computer game, force yourself to do parts of your homework first. Maybe after doing the first half you can start loading the game and then when you are done you will play it. This short partial reward system works especially well if you have long study sessions ahead that you can thereby split into smaller more realistic intervalls all followed by a small-“partial” reward that will not lead to a longer interruption.
5. Routine.
There are a lot of “study schedules”, most of which are absurd online, but they are unlikely to help you. If you struggle with motivation to begin with trying to follow a strict schedule, even if you set it yourself, will likely demotivate you even more. Instead, for example just plan to go to the library next Saturday to learn ahead or catch up a bit. If this works for you, then maybe go again next Wednesday etc.. If you wish to have a plan then set it up in a way that there is less scheduled than you would ideally be able to do, for it is very demotivating to fall behind your own ideals.
6. Environment.
Study, if possible, somewhere were you are surrounded by people also studying who are otherwise not part of your peer group or home. People seem to be more motivated when they see strangers sharing their suffering as well as giving room for competition and new contacts, be it a personal “library romance” or the law students who fell asleep on their desk a few tables over. Going out to study, to a park, your school, your cellar etc. will also make the experience more similiar to other hobbies you might have, allow for less distractions than your own room and you are less likely to give up, if you have put in the effort of getting there with all your materials.
7. Exam dates.
Something a bit of a personal trick, which might not be something you wish to do or should do, is to schedule exams earlier than they actually are. It has led to a lot of confusion by my classmates and parents in the past, but as a teenager I have made a point of putting the exam date a day or even a few days earlier in every calendar than it actually was, so much so that this “wrong date” was the one which I thought of when I thought of the exam. I finished all of my studies before that date and as it arrived I “suddenly” had time for revision. This practice can prevent procrastination, however, it makes no sense if all of your exams are within the same week, unless you move all of the by an equal amount forward in time.
Post scriptum: This advice is mostly centred on struggling less as a student and less on motivation, mostly because people can easier motivate themselves to do things they are good at.
Post post scriptum: There is a saying that “school is not for everyone”, however, unless you have an alternative that would be likely to financially secure you and offer you more joy than any job you could get by finishing school, droping out, especially if you are young and not far ahead in your academic endeavours is a bit of a pointlessly dramatic choice. When you ask the question under point one, the answer “I think a phd would look nice next to my name one day”, “I don’t know what else to do”, “my parents would think I am a bit stupid otherwise” are perfectally acceptable reasons. You can still search for alternatives to academia, but that does not mean you need to make your time till then more difficult and if you put enough effort in to succeed in some larts, those will become a lot less difficult.
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comehomeducklings · 3 years ago
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Past [Part 2] (Obsession)
A/N: Some chapters will be named with either “Past,” “Present,” or “Future,” then their numbered part coming right after it. This is to confuse you less when flashbacks or anything happens. As you have probably noticed, it says “Past” for Part 2. This is going back near when Tom and her just met. Thank you for reading! <3
Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4 | Part 5 | Part 6
Tom Riddle's Moodboard
Main Character's Moodboard
~////////////////𓆙////////////////~
1940 - 3rd year
“Potions is not that bad, I swear. You just have to be good at measuring.”
At the table, my friends and I are discussing our classes this year. Potions being one of my favorite topics. Devyn absolutely loathes that certain class. We have to drag her there to make sure she doesn’t skip. Poor girl tries her best to not mess up but the cauldron always ends up blowing up. I even watched her do every step once, never missing a beat. The potion still ended up failing, even though she did everything correctly. She gave up after a while, who wouldn’t. I help her do extra assignments for extra credit to keep her grade up. She also studies with me to make sure she can memorize everything and pass her tests. Amelia is pretty good at the class, she’s luckily paired with Devyn most of the time. Carrying the potion to success, with a little bit of my secret help. It’s not cheating, it’s using your resources.
I’m resources.
“Potions is not that bad,” Devyn mocks me. “If it weren’t for you two I would have gone insane in that stupid class.”
Amelia just laughs at her while eating her hash browns on the plate. She reaches her hand out to take some more eggs.
“You were able to do it before. Not the way you were supposed to, but it worked,” Amelia says.
“Exactly, just start doing it your way at this point. I don’t think Slughorn will care how it’s done, just how it comes out.”
Devyn nods her head and points at me with a fork. Her mouth full of food so she settles for that response. My plate doesn’t have much other than some bacon and fruit. I’m not usually a breakfast eater. I get my appetite at lunch and dinner time. It’s just too early for a bunch of food smells, the smells make me kind of nauseous. I’ll eat though, enough to hold me off till lunch.
The chatter in the lunchroom rises by the minute. Everyone refilling themselves before their busy day. All energy levels rising while everyone wakes up from their groggy morning mood. While my friends finish eating we continue to talk about our classes and share the schedules for this year. Most classes we had were the same except for our electives. I tried taking as many electives as possible. My family back home never really did magic. I actually came a year and a half late since my family wanted me to have a normal school experience. I learned to do everything without the use of magic, the only thing my mom taught me was the floo network, creatures, and plants. I would often accompany her to Diagon Alley when she shops. I got an Owl for my 10th birthday. A cat would have been amazing if I wasn’t allergic to it. My owl is a brown and white-furred barn owl. Don’t ask me why I named it Bartholomew. I was ten okay, give me a break. Speaking of the floo network, my mom had to chase me through it quite often because I kept teleporting everywhere. I once ran into the Ministry of Magic’s building and got lost. They had to take me home to my parents. Their faces told me everything I needed to know about the punishment waiting for me.
Halfway through the second year is when I came to Hogwarts, a second letter coming that year asking my parents to let me learn more there. So when they finally let me attend, everything was pretty new to me. My mother was the magic one in the family. Her grandmother, my great-grandmother, before her had the magic gene. Going to school was the same experience as going from a muggle-borns perspective. The difference is, I knew more about its existence. I would look at yearbooks my mom had from when she went here. She earned a lot of titles, all the achievements being recorded down. I always wondered why she never wanted me to come here. Did something happen to me, to her? I’m guessing she just wanted a normal life with dad. He has always supported her through everything. A love, a bond like that is hard to come by. He would also learn about magic right next to me. At least, the stuff my mom allowed to let us know.
That’s why I want to learn as much as I can, of what’s available. Why learn math in the muggle world when I could be learning divination. Spells of all types, potions for everything of inconvenience. My chores could be completed with just a flick of my wand. I’ve lately been learning wandless magic, on my own. Albus has helped by providing me with material to study that type of magic. The only thing I’ve managed so far is a spark coming from the tips of my fingertips. Sparking hope that I could actually, maybe, achieve that level. Now I won't get my hopes up, but that can lead me to a certain advantage in dueling. That being one of my weakest skills. Always panicking, saying any spells that pop up in my mind, and making random movements coming from my wand. Often confusing who I’m up against, although they recover from that confusion fairly quickly.
Riddle, met him once. One too many if you would ask me. I dissuade ever wanting to speak to him. Arrogance and pride flow through his tongue like second nature. I do take pride in succeeding above him in 3 classes. He is 2 classes above me but, that’s not the point. I do admit, he’s attractive. Only a little though, how else would he charm his way through the professors and students.
“Alright, I’m ready to go. You guys done?”
“Yeah,” I say. Devyn and I start leaving our seats and heading towards the huge doors.
Amelia hurried from her seat, a few steps behind since she took some fruit with her to eat on the way. More and more students also started making their way towards the first period. Not wanting to be blamed for the loss of house points. This system causes so many fights, everyone’s competitive side getting the best of their common sense. I would be lying if I said it didn’t get the best of me before. Amelia being her usual bubbly self skips backward while chatting with us. Before we could warn her to stop, she pushes someone ahead of her. Both falling down, hitting the floor. She spins her head extremely quickly, her hair sticking in her mouth from the force of the wind.
“I’m so sorry, I wasn’t paying attention,” she explains. Quickly trying to digest her situation. I make my way towards her and pull her up. I fix her robe and dust off any dirt on the cloth from the floor.
“Clearly idiot, can you not use those bug eyes of yours to see?”
Devyn and I make eye contact. We understand that there are witnesses here, and one of them is bound to snitch on us if we fight. A huge scene would probably make Amelia feel even more embarrassed as well. Instead, I guided Amelia by her back. We continue on to class while I comfort her. Devyn is staying back to “talk” to the guy. Lestrange is in for it now, any poor soul would be when in the fiery path of her anger.
Devyn’s loud yells could still be slightly heard when entering the potions classroom. First class of the year, and day. On Slughorn’s table, I can see a vial with the wideye potion contained inside. I set Devyn’s textbook on her station, turning to the page that contains information on the potion. Hoping to save her confusion and time.
“Welcome, welcome! Nice to see some old faces, and new ones,” he says with the biggest grin on his face. “Today we’ll be learning about the Wideye potion. Can anyone tell me what this potion does?”
I quickly raise my hand, rather eager. I did some reading about a lot of potions during the summer. Trying to get a headstart on my studies. This potion being one of them. Only 3 students raised their hand, one of them being me. The other, well, Riddle.
“Yes, go ahead and answer,” the professor looks my way.
I smile, “The wideye potion prevents the person consuming the liquid the ability to fall asleep. Which is often used in the medical field to wake someone from a sleep caused by a blunt force or drug.”
“Precisely! 10 points.”
I look back rather smugly at Riddle, rather happy I got chosen instead of him. I know, he could have easily answered that too. I’ll let myself bask in the small achievement for now. 30 minutes of class is just spent writing down notes, preparing us for the potion we will make. Note-taking is my favorite, especially the little doodles I get to make. We use a feather instead of the regular pen. I found it rather amusing and liked the certain feeling of writing with it. The dipping noise that the point of the feather makes when hitting the liquid ink is a very profound sound. No real writer’s bump forming on my fingers.
“That’s enough writing, I need you all to prepare your cauldron, gather the materials you need, and start your potion. If done correctly, tomorrow when we add the finishing touches and check on it the potion should be a blue/green color,” Slughorn comments. “You have 10 minutes to study your notes, then the rest of the class to make your potion. No looking back at your notes after those ten minutes.”
After scanning my notes, I stand up and walk towards the ingredients on the shelves. If I remember correctly my potion requires snake fangs, standard ingredient, and wolfsbane. I gather all that in my hand and set it down near my cauldron. Before I start, I take a moment. I’m missing something, I’m sure there was another ingredient.
Wolfsbane, check.
Snake fangs, six of them.
I have the measures of Standard ingredient.
There’s one more, I try to look around the room. Then I remember that we get an automatic failing grade if caught cheating. There’s no way I’ll let my grade drop like that. Over something so small and inconvenient too. Making my way to the shelves, I scan over the ingredients over and over again. Trying to see if any of the names pop out to me.
No.
Definitely not.
That’s an ingredient?
I don’t even want to know how that one was obtained.
This one, of course it’s this one. I even remember putting a star next to the name in my notebook. Dried Billwig stings, I believe six of them were needed. All that time wasted. Hurrying to my seat I get to work. The time goes by quickly, all that could be heard was the sizzling and whooshing of our potions. I almost knocked down my vials a couple of times. Someone actually did, their time spent on cleaning the glass off the floor. After heating the first three ingredients, I crush them together in the mortar. Then stir clockwise from what I recall, three times specifically. Finally, I wave my wand over then leave it to brew.
Just in time from the looks of it. I glance at Devyn to see how it went for her, and she looks pretty proud of herself. I take that as a blessing that it didn’t blow up this time of round. I’m guessing she took our advice and did it her own way.
A student raises his hand, “May we leave?”
“Oh yes yes, go ahead. No assignments for the first day, only the potion you made in class.”
Before I leave the classroom I examine Riddle’s station. He already left the room. His potion looks similar to how mine turned out, his workspace thoroughly cleaned. Everything used properly placed back to where it should be. Perfectly spotless, not a single speck of dust in sight. All done without magic too, surprising for someone born into the wizarding world. When I mentioned that I met him once, it wasn’t much of anything. The only way I know how he really acts is through other people. Much admire his intelligence and strong will. Others are jealous of the potential he holds for the future.
Girls are already trying to slip love potions into his drinks. I would feel bad if he wasn’t so rude to them. Only just before touching the disrespectful line. He almost drank one of their attempts before. Wouldn’t want to imagine how that turned out. Tom riddle, in love. That man probably doesn’t know the feeling of happiness, let alone love. I feel bad for his future girlfriend, she’s going to have to deal with a handful of baggage.
~////////////////𓆙////////////////~
“How much do you want to bet Nott will demolish him?” A Gryffindor girl to my left whispers.
Nott, part of Riddle’s group from what I’ve seen. They all eat lunch together and talk to one another so it’s a reasonable guess. Very talented duellist, one of the bests here.
“I hate to admit it, but he’ll definitely win this. I’ll still have hope for the other guy though,” I whisper back trying not to sound mean.
Nott and the other Slytherin boy are up right now. It’s a courtesy for the audience to stay quiet until someone casts the first attack or defense. From then on all you will hear is shouting of encouragement and the opposite. Nott’s eyes are focused, zoning in on the opponent before him. His wand is steady, mouth slightly parted to breathe through better. Whole-body alert and tense waiting for something. From what I'm getting, I believe he’s waiting for the Slytherin boy to go first. Nott casts spells quickly and thinks them through decently. Sometimes you're not able to create a counter-spell quick enough to defend yourself against him.
Riddle’s group and himself are near the corner of the platform. All seemingly analyzing every breath he inhales and exhales. I finally hear the whoosh of a wand and a whiz of light fly past the platform. The glow from the spell lighting our faces for a millisecond. Nott quickly counters that spell and moves to cast his own. Magic flies across the platform, all of our eyes going back and forth like a ping-pong match. The Slytherin boy starts breaking a sweat. He’s only been able to get a couple of offensive spells in there, most of his plays spent throwing off Nott’s. If he doesn’t turn the battle soon, the outcome will become very clear.
It is a little less exciting since we only know a handful of spells. So whatever you know from your own studies you use in these duels. When we move up the years the class will become more serious and dangerous. Right now it’s just to teach us how to counter and cast quickly. The proper etiquette and movement. You use spells that you know, they aren’t supposed to harm someone. Either stun them, make them fly back, or disarm. Most of those spells require a little of a higher level, most of us not even knowing of its existence yet. So what’s mostly cast between competitors is a basic spell to exert force. That force should be aimed for the legs, or the wand to disarm that way. The way someone can win here is to make their knees or hands touch the floor, or disarm their wand. As I mentioned, it will get more intense as time goes by. We're only just starting 3rd year right now, a lot more charms will be learned later on.
I shake my head to get rid of any lingering thoughts. My attention goes right back to the duel taking place in front of me. Nott quickly aims a spell at the knees and manages to bring the other boy to his knees.
“Mr. Nott wins this duel! Please step off the platform, we will evaluate your performance.”
During the practice duels today, you watch it, think of ways to help the person improve, and point out things they might have done wrong. At the end, the professor picks people raising their hands to allow them to give their feedback. Participating is part of the grade you get in here. I personally prefer giving feedback then dueling. I’m not the best at casting, I do give out good defense spells though. That should mean something, I hope.
“Let’s start with Nott, does anyone have feedback for him?”
A couple of people spread apart raised their hands. One by one they all ask questions and give feedback. They mention his feet and posture when he stands. Arms fully stretched out where it would have been more flexible to bend it slightly. When he casts he shouldn’t be walking backward. They shortly switch to the other boy’s questions and feedback. The way he never gave himself the opening to cast an offensive spell often. He would move around his area a lot. Almost slipping off the stage during one of those movements. Tom and his group privately discussed with one another. They’re probably giving Nott their own feedback and suggestions privately.
“Now, Riddle I want you to come up and…,” he scans the room for another student. After some time he points his finger at me. “You.”
I could have had a smooth sailing class. I was so close to not having to go up there. My hands start sweating a bit, my anxiety jumbling my thoughts together. Riddle’s already up there and soon to be on his side of the platform. Taking his wand out and wandering his fingers over the design. I gulp, a big toad stuck in my throat. I wipe my hands on my robe and start up the stairs. Riddle seems as unbothered as ever. We bow, turn, then walk ten paces back. During this time I try predicting who will cast first. I don’t know him very well, I’ve also never seen him duel.
I take my dueling stance and wait for the signal to start. Hoping, praying, that I don’t embarrass myself. Slipping up is not allowed, not when going against him.
~////////////////𓆙////////////////~
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marshmallow-phd · 4 years ago
Text
Nine Little Letters
Tumblr media
Genre: College AU, Fake Dating AU, To All the Boys I’ve Loved Before AU
Inspired By: This graphic made by @rcse-tvler​
Pairing: EXO x Reader
Summary: Just when you thought life was done shoving you down, it got much, much worse. After finding out that your latest crush was already in a relationship, you did what you always did when emotions ran high: you wrote a letter. Signed and sealed, you put it away with the eight other letters you’d written to past one-sided loves, never to be seen again. That is, until a mix up accidentally sends those letters out to their respective recipients and you find yourself in the middle of one confusing web of love. With fake relationships, insecurities, and revelations swirling around, things are bound to get a little messy.
Part: 1 I 2 I 3 I 4 I 5 I 6 I 7 I 8 I 9 I 10 I 11
This was the worst kind of humiliation. Standing there on the sidewalk staring open-mouthed at the one person you were excited to see today, you were crumbling into a million pieces. And no one even noticed. That was what made this humiliation so bad; there was no one to witness it. You were breaking and no one cared.
You should have known better, really. This morning was going too well. You had woken up on time, had a delicious, filling breakfast, and had managed to put an outfit together worthy of any Pinterest board. Your confidence was through the roof and you were going to do the one thing in your life you swore you would never do.
You were going to confess to your crush.
Signing up for math tutoring was the last thing you wanted to do. Who in the world wanted to spend their valuable free time learning more about equations and algorithms? But you needed to pass this class. It was the second time you’d taken college algebra and the thought of taking it a third time made you want to crawl under your bed. So, you buckled down and took the walk of shame into the math lab. (Yes, that was an exaggeration. Everyone knows there is no shame in getting help. Didn’t mean you had to like it.) When you got the call from your assigned tutor, you ignored it. You didn’t like talking on the phone to anyone let alone a number you didn’t recognize. No voicemail was left. Then a text came through.
Hi, (y/n)! This Kim Junmyeon! I’ve been assigned as your math tutor. When you get a chance, let me know when you’re free so we can create a schedule that works for you. Have a great day!
You waited an appropriate amount of time before replying. So, an hour and half later, you texted him your schedule and made a plan to meet up in the library the following Thursday. You marked that day on your calendar with exactly zero enthusiasm. In your head, this Kim Junmyeon was the cliché nerd from movies: dorky glasses, snort-like laugh, and clothes that looked better on a grandfather. Oh, boy were you so happy to be wrong.
Sitting down at one of the tables by the large, ceiling high windows, Junmyeon was nothing like you’d imagined. He had a sophisticated aura about him. He dressed nicely, a thin long-sleeved shirt over a patterned button down, the collar laid nicely over the top of the shirt, and was blessed with sharp, handsome features. You knew you were in trouble. But you didn’t care. You sat down at that table eagerly, ready to… learn.
For the past month and a half, you’d met Junmyeon twice a week to go over the lessons and work on the assignments. By some miracle, your grade was actually going up in the class. Somehow you were able to better comprehend the material and secretly fawn over your tutor simultaneously. At this point, you were sort of feigning how much you weren’t understanding to keep the tutoring sessions going. The nice thing about algebra, once you understood the basics, everything else built on top of it.
But today – today you had decided that you were going to step over the line from tutor and student into the realm of perhaps something more.
You liked Junmyeon. You liked his math puns and the way he scrunched his face when he thought hard about something. His lips would pucker whenever he lifted the sheet of paper to check over your work. Each time you met up with him your heart acted like it was in the middle of a NASCAR race and it was determined to win. You had it bad. This wasn’t the first time you’d had a crush like this, but you had set your mind on making this one different. This time, you wouldn’t hold it inside. You were going to be the brave one, the bold one. The fact that birds were tweeting as you rode your bike onto campus should have been a sign that things would only be downhill from there. Unfortunately, like the optimistic idiot, you took it as a positive instead.
After locking your bike up, you headed straight for the courtyard near the pond. Junmyeon had told you that he often spent his mornings there to finish up homework or to read a book (the fact that he read so much was another factor in your liking of him). In your head, he was all alone, flipping through a novel as he leaned against the trunk of a tree, looking like a prince taking a rest in the shade on a warm summer’s day. The water would be glistening in the background as a lovely, lighthearted melody played softly through the air. He would see you approach and smile that wide, brilliant smile. Your heart would skip as you sat down in the grass next to him and poured out your feelings. The daydream turned into a nightmare the second he came into view.
Junmyeon was not alone nor was he sitting under a tree with a book. He was on one of the benches, splayed out on the wooden beams with his head resting in the lap of a very pretty, more his league type of girl. She laughed as Junmyeon told a story. A delicate hand ran through his soft brown hair. Your heart fell to the ground, forming a crater at your feet.
Shoulders slumped and day ruined, you turned and headed for the student union. If today was going to suck like this, then you were going to sprinkle it with an overly sugary coffee drink. Preferably with extra chocolate drizzle. It helped - a little bit.
Your morning classes went by in a blur. You were certain you took notes, but none of the information sank in. Later you would have to transcribe your quick scribbles to a word document to help you study. You would learn the information then. By lunch, you were starting to peel yourself off the sidewalk of humiliation. Especially when the one person you could always rely on joined you for lunch.
“How did it go?”
You remained silent, continuously munching on the sandwich in your hands as your best friend sat down across from you at the small, two-person table near the middle of the cafeteria.
Baekhyun laughed his signature, SpongeBob-like laugh. “That bad, huh? I told you not to do it.”
“Technically, I didn’t do it,” you corrected. “He already has a girlfriend.”
“Ouch.”
You nodded. How could you not see this before? Did he mention having a girlfriend and you just blocked it out? Junmyeon and you talked casually between math problems, about your friends and fun things you liked to do on the weekends. He’d failed to mention one very important detail.
“Well,” Baekhyun reached over and plucked a potato chip off your plate and plopped it in his mouth, “at least you found out before you said something. I told you he wasn’t worth it.”
“Just because he has a girlfriend doesn’t mean he isn’t worth crushing on.”
“Okay. Whatever you say.”
You rolled your eyes at him. “You’re so much help.”
Ignoring your quip, Baekhyun snatched another chip. You smacked his hand, but all that managed to do was break off a few pieces, the crumbs falling to the table. Smiling proudly, Baekhyun popped the half-chip into his mouth. “So, are you just going to go home and write a letter?”
“Are you just going to go home and write a letter?” you mocked with a scrunched face.
Byun Baekhyun had been your best friend since the two of you had met in the first grade. He’d stolen your popsicle that your mother had packed as a special treat for your first full day of school. When he saw you start to cry, he broke off the piece he’d been sucking on and handed the rest back to you. There was a bit of a disagreement on the level of nice-ness that act achieved since it was your popsicle to begin with, but somehow it caused the two of you to be inseparable ever since. Being your best friend meant that he was privy to the more private parts of your life.
Like the letters.
Starting as young as ten years old, you’d developed a bit of a tradition when it came to your crushes. Emotions were hard to process, but you found them easier to work through if you thought about them and translated them into words. Those words would fly across the paper, transferring the feelings that made you both laugh and cry into the graphite that formed them. Not to mention, the act made you feel like the heroine in a rom-com. Certainly it was something that Meg Ryan or Rachel McAdams would do once they realized how they felt about the male lead.
The first letter you ever wrote was during your final year of ballet class. Dancing had been a part of your life since you were three, but a new passion had been discovered so you’d decided to quit after this last cluster of classes. A terrible decision, really. Because right after your mind was already made up, a new boy had joined the class.
Kim Jongin.
He had just moved into town after his father was promoted to a new position and had to transfer to headquarters. You’d never seen him at the park or the grocery store before. He was completely new. And beautiful.
He was blessed golden skin that glistened, shining brighter the longer he danced. And, oh, the way he danced. It was well beyond what anyone else could do. His movements were fluid, water-like, as if the very beat of the music were pulling and manipulating his limbs to convey what the notes had to say. Each move was a word and when he formed them together, they could make you smile or cry. And when he smiled… oh, his smile was like starlight. The kind of brightness that stayed in the sky even as the city lights flickered on. To this day, you’d never found one that could rival it. He was a dream that every composer coveted. So, what was your young heart to do?
Well, the movies told you to confess. But there was no way you could find the courage to do so, especially since you only saw him in class and you couldn’t confess in front of everyone. The only other option was to write it out; to write it out like Jane Austen pouring her heart out for Tom Lefroy.
 Dear Jongin,
I’m not sure how to start this. Do I compliment you on your dancing? It’s nothing like I’ve seen before. Prima Donnas in the Russian Ballet would be jealous of you! But you probably hear that all the time. And about how handsome you are, even under all that hair. I can’t help but watch when you pull it back for class so you can see yourself in the mirror. Why can’t I look like that? I somehow ended up looking like a frizzy wet cat that just climbed out of the tub.
I guess what I’m trying to avoid saying is that… I like you. A lot. I like your laugh and your wide smile. I like how much you love music and how you interpret the melody with your moves. No one can freestyle like you! My heart does a dance of its own whenever I see you. I hope you don’t have anyone that you like, just so I can stand a chance. Would you ever think of me like that? If not, it’s okay. I just needed to tell you. Someday, you’ll be on stage dancing to an audience of thousands and I’ll be right there in the front row, cheering you on! Until then, I hope you always find happiness in what you love.
Love,
(y/n).
 That sentence about watching him on stage made you cringe in hindsight. Cute for a ten-year-old, but a bit stalkerish. Luckily, though, you never gave it to him. You chickened out every time up until the last class. The idea of him opening it and reading right there in front of you was mortifying. So, then, you decided to mail it. The teacher gave you his address after you told her you wanted to invite him to your birthday party (it should be a little worrisome that a teacher was willing to pass on private information like that… perhaps it was because you were a kid). Three times you went to the mailbox to send the letter out and three times you ran back inside to hide it under your mattress.
That was the beginning of your weird little tradition. Though you never sent the letter to Jongin, you felt better having somewhat confessed your feelings and worked through them without the humiliation of actually… doing it. So, the next time you had a crush so overwhelming that you needed to get the feelings out, you wrote a letter. You even went all the way each time to address the envelope, giving the confession a sense of finality. There was no fear in them ever going out. Baekhyun was the only other one in the world who knew of their existence. At the current moment, eight were hidden in a drawer in your vanity. The way your fingers were itching, a ninth one was on the way.
“I might,” you finally replied.
Baekhyun leaned forward eagerly. “Can I read it when you’re done?”
“No!”
He snapped his fingers as he sat back in his chair. “Darn.”
“Why am I even friends with you?”
“Because I’m charming.”
There was no question in his voice. He one-hundred percent believed it. And… to be honest, he did have his moments. But that was all in the past. “Like a plank of wood.”
Shaking his head, Baekhyun rapped his hands on the table before standing up. “Alright, I’m going to class. Have fun with your pencil and imagination.” For emphasis on his stupid remark, he stole one last chip before walking off.
You finished off your sandwich in a bit of a rage. By the time you were finished, your mouth muscles were aching as if you’d spent several hours at the gym and it was jaw day.
You only had one class left for the afternoon. But it was algebra. How were you supposed to concentrate on functions when your sad attempt at getting into a relationship with your tutor failed so epically? Somehow you managed, though, and you packed up at the end of class with a new sort of determination. As you hopped on your bike and rode home, you thought over what you were going to write. You were so lost in your head that you hadn’t notice the car pulling out of your neighbor’s driveway, nearly hitting you before the driver hit their brakes.
“Shoot!”
You back peddled to break. Your heart thumped in your chest. No life memories flashed before your eyes, but you were sure you almost died. Slowly, you moved forward to get out of the way of the car. 
“I’m sorry!” you yelled over your shoulder.
The driver leaned out the window.
Oh, great.
It was your neighbor. Or, at least, your neighbor’s son. Do Kyungsoo. He stared at you with an expression that could be blank but could also be a glare. It was hard to tell with him. Shaking his head, he pulled back inside the car and drove away.
Fighting off embarrassment for the second time this day - albeit this situation was much lower on the scale and it happened a bit more often than you’d like to admit - you put your bike up in the backyard and headed up to your room. Your mother, a literary history professor, and your father, a doctor at the local hospital, were both at work and wouldn’t be home until well after dinner. You were used to it. Besides, you were an adult and you liked being able to decide to have pizza for dinner and not worry about what other people wanted for toppings. Once you put your order in, you sat down at your vanity and got to work.
 Dear Junmyeon,
Has anyone told you how your hair looks in the sunlight? The dark brown hues seem so warm and inviting, like an ebony chair that was warmed by the unfiltered rays. I’ve always wondered what it would be like to run my finger through it. Would the strands be as soft as they look? Would you wear the same smile on your face that you do during our sessions? But I guess I might not be meant to feel them. Today, I intended to tell you how I felt. I woke up with a determination, a goal to say how much I like you to your face. I was so nervous riding my bike to the university, but it was the good kind of nervous; the kind that makes you keep going. It seemed, however, that I was too late. Or maybe I simply never had a chance at all. I’d missed any signs that said you were already someone else’s.
I hope she knows how lucky she is. I hope she makes you laugh and listens to you when you’re having a bad day. Your laugh is like a symphony. Does she tell you how light and lovely it is? Or how infectious it is? When you laugh, I can’t help but laugh along. It’ll be sad not to hear it anymore. Or have our talks filled with random subject changes. But I think I’ll miss your smile most of all. The way it crinkles your eyes yet still lets them shine. The way it spreads across your face and the way your cheeks grow. It is truly a sight to behold. I hope wherever you go, you are always smiling. You always let your light shine even on the cloudiest of days. That’s what’s so special about you and what made me fall for you. Even when I was frustrated or couldn’t understand, you were patient, taking my mind off of the negative and turning me so I could face the positive. That’s a rare kind of person. You are a rare kind of person. Please always be happy, Kim Junmyeon.
Love,
(y/n)
 With a sigh you sat back in your chair. The letter had done its job. Though you were still sad about the way things turned out, you no longer felt defeated. The words you needed to say were now out there without being “out there”. Okay, so he had a girlfriend. Big deal. It wasn’t the end of the world. There were more potential love interests out there that you could find. He was only one and obviously wasn’t the one.
Beginning to smile again, you folded the letter and put it in an envelope. You didn’t have Junmyeon’s address, so you wrote out the address for the math lab. Opening the top drawer of the vanity, you placed the latest addition to your collection under the first envelope. The doorbell rang right as you closed it up again. Oh, thank goodness. Food.
Practically skipping down the steps, you hurried to the front door.
“Hi-” You stopped as soon as you’d opened it. The person waiting on the other side was not the pizza delivery guy - it was Baekhyun. The boxes holding the pizza and cheese sticks you’d order for no one but yourself were in his hands. Over his shoulder, you barely caught sight of the delivery man driving away. “Really?”
“What? I was bored. And hungry.” He flipped open the lid to show you the hot, melted cheese of the appetizer. “Cheese stick?”
Rolling your eyes, you stepped aside so he could come inside.
Baekhyun had been to your home plenty of times in the past so it was easy for him to make himself at home. He didn’t wait for you before pulling plates out of the cabinet and pouring a drink. He even went as far as getting you glass as well. “Thirsty?”
“Yeah, thanks.”
The two of you ate at the kitchen table as your mother had a “no meals in the living room” policy. Small snacks like nuts and popcorn were okay, as long as you didn’t spill any on the couches.
“So… how did the writing go?” Baekhyun asked cheekily between bites.
You shrugged. “Fine. I’m deciding that I’m getting over it.”
Now it was Baekhyun’s turn to roll his eyes. “You always get over them fast.”
“What’s the point of dwelling on the things you can’t change?”
That was always your answer. Yes, the hurt was immediate and painful, but Baekhyun was right, you tended to push it aside rather quickly. That was the whole point of your letters, anyway. Get the feelings out of the way so you could move on. What was the point of clinging on to something like that? You would only end up worse if you stayed in that spot. So, you pushed yourself to move on. And eight times out of nine, it had worked. There was only that one nagging letter that failed to do its job. That particular set of feelings refused to go away even as you looked to other crushes, as you found other boys to like. It was the one you would always wonder about, the one that was completely off limits. The dull ache still crept up every once in a while. If moving on was what you had to do, you would do it. Because you would prefer if you never had to go through something like that ever again.
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thedeadedhooman · 3 years ago
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OH WHAT A BEAUTIFUL DAY!
Last night I was talking to a friend and she told me that I should blog. All things considered and the events leading to this moment have compelled me to write this. Well who would read my blog, "Nothing happens to me" (quotes Dr. John H. Watson.) @she-nuwanda thanks for the idea. This week was already miserable and I have to submit my biology project today. Also, I have a double maths test. So I had to pull an all-nighter and I went to bed at 6:30 AM. I had my classes from 9AM again. So I somehow slept roughly for 2 hrs and again had to wake up. After completing the act of waking unsuccessfully, I went to the sofa, sat down, lied down, and then fell asleep. My mum again woke me up and I joined my history class at 9 AM. I fell asleep while doing my history class. After few moments of nothingness, I woke up and realized I hadn't brushed my teeth YET. My history teacher was checking the essays she made us write which would be marked for our final exam and she checked mine last week so I wasn't worried about it. I put the brush in my mouth for 2.37 seconds and MY HISTORY TEACHER CALLED MY BLOODY NAME. I rushed to the basin and started washing my mouth when my mum rushed in and told me that THE PLUMBER IS WORKING ON THE PIPELINES, THERE'S DIRTY WATER THROUGH EVERY OUTLET. LIKE WTF? I washed my mouth incompletely with bottled water. HOW GROSS! And then fled to my study table and opened my essay. By that time probably a million years had passed because my history teacher forgot that I existed and didn't call my name until the end of the class and when I was one-fourth way into my essay the zoom meeting ended ABRUPTLY. My eyes are twerking right now. I need to sleep. SERIOUSLY. My mum and dad will visit some relatives at 2PM, so it'll just be my sister and me. I WILL HIBERNATE TILL 8TH OCTOBER. GOD BLESS MY SLEEP SCHEDULE! I am pretty sure you two @hippogriffalmighty and @ashmj5 know how it feels.
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