#watching the left hand at work is like. there is pain (mental) involved

[aviul]

abstractober day 26: change of pace drawn entirely with my left hand (for the record, i am *very* right-handed) with minimal undo usage

[dxxdhood]

drains me slowly

pairing: wade wilson x gn!reader

summary: deadpool finally invites you, the coworker he has a massive crush on, over, which means the two of you end up doing more than just watching a movie.

tags: smut (18+), sub!wade wilson, dom!reader, pain kink, use of superpowers to fuel a pain kink, light masochism, teasing, gentle dom, hand job, scratching, body worship

wc: 3.3k

a/n: fic inspired by the new deadpool movie coming out!!! also, title is from love me dead by ludo.

No surprise that Wade wasn’t exactly anyone’s favorite– that goes for among the heroes he’s worked with and throughout his life in general. He’s – to put it in the kindest way anyone’s ever told him – fucking annoying. Oh, he’s more than aware that he’s a little too out-of-pocket, abrasive, impulsive– a nightmare to interact with, really. And those were just the recent comments made by the closest thing he has to coworkers! The shit he heard from people growing up was leagues worse. 

Look, having a rough start in life isn’t uncommon and he’s sure as hell not gonna get the tiny violin out for himself and throw his own little pity party, but he’s grown enough since his healing factor got beat out of him to acknowledge that he’s had it tough over the years.

He’s still going, though! Yeah, he may not always be the best at doing his laundry quick enough to get any clean clothes to wear, or at stopping his room from becoming cluttered with too many half-empty water bottles, but he’s still making it by, day by day.

But, well, it’s still really hard to constantly put himself out there, get assigned – or infinitely more likely, just shove himself into – whatever jobs or missions he feels like taking on when everyone treats him like Jar Jar Binks.

That was until you came along. So, obviously you’re crazy hot – he’s gotta get that out of the way first – but more than that, you were confident. Competent, too, and those rarely coincide in Wade’s experience. You mostly worked on call, joining the occasional mission, battle, or investigation because your mutant powers came in handy often, but you also still kept up with your day job. Honestly, Wade thinks the reason why you weren’t always present in fights was to stop the other mutants from being out of a job. Your ability to slowly deteriorate surrounding biological tissue, while horrifying and a pain in the ass to control – your words – was basically winning on easy mode.

But no, you were adamant about keeping your involvement with the X-Men infrequent– only joining when your presence was absolutely necessary. Apparently nonstop high stress situations aren't good for your mental health– who knew?

And he wants to pretend he became obsessed with you because of all those things, and of course they helped, but really, you had him at hello. Or well, you bothering to say hello and actually talk to him in the first place, to ask him questions about his life in moments of downtime where usually he’d be left with an unenthusiastic audience instead of a warm-hearted listener who actually laughed at his jokes.

So, of course, he has to go and fuck it up.

…

“So, glad that’s over, huh?” Wade says through a smile, the whites of his mask squeezing as his cheeks rise. “Speaking of over, you wanna come?���

“Over?” you shake your head a little, flashing your teeth as you try and comprehend him. “Right after we took on a whole crime ring?”

“Well, what a better time to unwind, am I right?”

“Oh?” you raise your eyebrows. “We’re unwinding?”

It’s small, but you swear Wade ups his talking speed, “Well, yeah, you know. Watch a movie, order in, show you my Pokemon cards, the works.”

You hum, pretending to consider it, “Depends, you got a holo Charizard?”

And now, for sure, he exhales his relief. “You insult me.”

The two of you enter his apartment not long after you’re dismissed from the mission, and Wade briefly excuses himself to change out of his suit. Making yourself at home, you take a seat on the couch and glance across his living room. His apartment is surprisingly nice. The kitchen and living room are one large, open space with a sleek, modern design. Also, you’d assume someone as chaotic as Wade would keep their house in a messier state, or hell, at least a little dusty, but the living room is spotless. Maybe he cleaned recently? What, was he planning on inviting someone over?

Snorting as you shake your head, a small click from across the hall catches your attention.

You’ve only seen Wade on the job, so naturally he’s always been wearing his red suit, but for some reason, you never stopped to picture him wearing civilian clothes. Actually, now that you’re seeing him in a sweatshirt and sweatpants – awfully warm for this weather – you’re struggling to reconcile the image of him you had in your head with the person right in front of you.

Well, at least until Wade brings up a fist to cover his mouth, illustrating his nervousness, and the tension fizzles out. Only Wade has body language that cartoonishly exaggerated.

“Nice sweats, green looks good on you.”

Wade pauses for a moment, registering your words before he giggles softly, arm falling to his side, “I’ve been thinking about changing the color of my suit. You know, hiding all the blood is great and all, but sometimes I gotta wonder – could this thing be more flattering?”

He walks over with a spring in his step before sitting by your side. Cutely, he wraps you up in the larger blanket first before settling the smaller, throw blanket over himself. You try your hardest not to show your confusion outwardly, but seeing Wade up close now has you questioning his outfit all the more.

He’s a bit tall, so the sweatpants don’t go all the way down to his ankles, but Wade’s wearing calf socks, as if he specifically were trying to avoid them being uncovered. Also, his hoodie’s easily a size or two larger, which makes it the perfect thing to wear to lounge around and watch a movie in, but also, the sleeves cover his entire hand sans his fingers. From the little you can see of them, they look puckered in scars.

But obviously Wade’s hands are scarred– he’s a mercenary. He’s handled all sorts of weapons and been in hundreds of fights over the years. You weren’t expecting his skin to be baby-smooth. 

What’s interesting to you is why he’d go through all the trouble to hide it.

Also, yeah, the most obvious pointers were that the hood of his sweatshirt is up even though you two are indoors in his own home and – how could you forget this one – his Deadpool mask is still on.

Was he just uncomfortable with sharing his identity in general or was he specifically trying to shove distance between the two of you? Whatever, if he doesn’t want to take his mask off with you, he doesn’t have to. You feel a distinct pang in your chest, but you try not to let it color how you respond to him. He’s more than in the right to only share what he feels most comfortable with.

Wade’s been fiddling with the remote while you’ve been – hopefully – subtly looking him over, and the screen finally changes from a streaming service page to the opening of the movie.

“We’re watching The Princess Bride? I didn’t take you for a romantic.”

He bats his eyes – at least, you think he does, given the mask– and speaks in a sweet voice “Why, me? Oh please, I know romance. I’m not going to invite a lovely, gorgeous, incredible person over and force them to watch Die Hard on the first–”

His back straightens out like he’s been electrocuted before he forcibly relaxes his posture to finish his thought.

“Hang-out.”

Okay, you want to go easy on him, especially because he seems so tense, but you can’t just let that one slide. You close the small distance remaining between the two of you, causing your entire side to press against his. Even through his sweatshirt, you can feel how warm he is.

“Mmm, just a hang out?” you mumble, sliding your head onto his shoulder. You’ve done this before, either for comedic effect or just in an attempt to push his buttons the same way he always tries to push yours – which, despite his best efforts, always ends up endearing him to you instead of bothering you – but never in a context like this.

He inhales sharply, and you count the seconds until he finally lets himself release it. Sometimes, you think he takes his healing factor for granted.

Turning his head to peer down at you, Wade considers you for a moment, keeping his face and body language deceptively neutral. You try your hardest to keep your eyes focused on the movie and your body loose and comfortable.

“You want this to be a date?” he says, flat.

“Why, thank you for asking, dear sir,” you copy his sweet voice from earlier before returning to your normal. “Yes, Wade, I like you.”

“I–” he starts, but the words get caught on their way out. His fingers bury themselves in the material of his sweatpants, and the movement draws your attention to them again. Shades of blotchy red and pink curve all across his skin.

Wade doesn’t say anything, which is concerning enough on its own, but following your confession, you feel like he’s more than out of his element. 

“That’s why you invited me over, right?” you try and help him out. “You feel the same, too.”

And then, feeling bold, you turn your head to face his still mask-covered head and kiss him lightly on the cheek. Instantly, you see fireworks go off inside him, because Wade hurriedly shuts the TV off and runs off to close the blinds. There’s barely enough light in the room now to make out shapes, but apparently Wade doesn’t take any issue because he peels his mask back and kisses you on the lips.

His lips are textured, and your intuition flashes quietly in the back of your mind, but for right now, you focus on how energetic he is. If his body is warm, his mouth feels like it’s on fire. He’s constantly moving, trying to experience all of you as fast as possible. 

It’s making your face heat up, how quickly he demands your complete attention and how relentless he is in grabbing it. Wade bites your bottom lip, causing you to gasp into him, and he uses the opportunity to explore across your own teeth and tongue. After a few more seconds, you break away, needing the space to breathe.

“Holy shit,” you whisper, voice rough.

“You’re telling me,” Wade coughs out. “We could’ve been doing that this whole time?”

“Well, all you had to do was ask.”

And although you can’t see him, which you know is the point, you understand something in him has shifted. He gets up from the couch, takes you by the hand, and leads you towards his room. His pace is so quick, you barely comprehend his actions until you’re both standing right in front of his bed.

“Is this okay?” he asks, quiet. You don’t think you’ve ever heard him stifle the amount of words he let loose before.

“Yes, of course it is. But Wade, we have to turn on at least a lamp or something in here.”

“We do?”

“Yeah,” you pause to give him a second to think. “I can’t see you at all like this.”

“What if – and you're just going to have to trust me on this one – you’d prefer it this way,” Wade’s voice is light, but it feels like it’s cracking at the edges.

“And why’s that?”

Not like you’d be able to see, but the anxiety radiating off of him makes him sound wide-eyed, “Huh? Oh, I– uh…”

“Look, if you’re worried about how I’m going to react to you having a bunch of scars– don’t. I don’t mind,” the sound of fabric rustling in front of you makes you think he just flinched. “I figured it out. You’re not sneaky.”

“You say that, but…”

“Wade, I don’t care. And I mean that kindly! Really, it doesn’t bother me.”

Wade starts pacing in front of you, nearly tripping on the leg of the bedpost, “Look, I appreciate the whole hero act you got going on here – really fits you good, you should totally quit your day job – but you don’t have to force yourself, I–”

“Wade, you either confront your insecurities head on or I’m not doing this with you. I told you what I think, the only person who’s going to worry about how you look here is you. We either have sex with a light on or not at all, okay?”

No one speaks for a few seconds once you finish saying your piece, and you cringe, realizing how forceful you must have come off. You’re about to speak up again to apologize when you hear a shudder-filled exhale from a few feet away.

“Jesus H. Christ,” he groans. “You’re so hot when you're putting people in their place.”

Your lips curl into a shaky smile, “Yeah, what else do you think is hot?”

And you can practically hear the gears turning in his head from here.

…

It’s actually happening. No fucking way he didn’t dream this up. But you were pretty adamant about him getting his head in the game in order for you guys to actually get down and dirty, so for you, he tries to keep his train of thought as focused as possible–  a big ask.

“Bossing anyone – everyone, especially me – around. You using your abilities–” you reach over and find Wade’s hand before running your fingers up his arm. “Shit, umm, using your abilities in general, but, umm, I really like when I’m there.”

“Oh?” you giggle. “When you get to watch, or?”

“When I get to feel.”

Your hand moves over to the nape of his neck, reaching under his hood and mask, to rub at his rough skin. Wade’s nerves light on fire as he waits for you to respond– for some reason, it never feels like your words come out fast enough.

“You got a thing for pain, Wilson?”

He chuckles, “You’d be surprised.”

“Okay, but are you sure? I can try, but it might not be all that good for you.”

“Don’t worry,” he thinks back to all those times he had a hard on while the two of you were fighting together. “It’ll be great for me.”

You hum, “Alright, then, but you tell me to stop the second you don’t like something, okay?”

“Aye, aye, captain,” he salutes, though you probably can’t see it. “And, same goes for you.”

“What a gentleman, letting me destroy him and giving me an out.”

He’s blushing something furious and he’s never been more grateful for the dark, “Anything for you.”

Those are the last words he whispers before he begins undressing. He knows you probably meant for him to strip with the light on, but he’s really not so sure he could stomach being looked at like a bug under a microscope. The attention, while electrifying, was already starting to get to him, so he lets himself stay in his comfort zone a little longer. As a treat. 

Once his sweats are off, he hesitantly peels off his mask before slipping into bed, keeping most of his body under the covers. After shutting his eyes, he clicks the lamplight on.

You’re not saying anything. That’s– a sign? A good one, a bad one, Wade doesn’t know. He’s trying so hard to keep his breathing steady, but he can feel his body start shaking all on its own.

You join him on the bed, kneeling next to him, before your warm breath falls across his cheeks as you kiss his forehead. Only then does he open his eyes, and you reward him by cupping his cheek in your hand.

“There,” you say. “Wasn’t so hard, was it?”

Wade gets the strong urge to snort, and so he does, but your eyes narrow. There’s a soft scratching at the back of his skull as you snake your hand over, and quickly you dig your nails in slightly. Wade has to bite his tongue to keep the noise in.

“I’m sorry, is that funny to you?”

“No!” he whispers sharply as you bring your hand down to scratch along the line of his neck.

“Good, seems like you’re learning.”

You kiss him, teeth clacking together at first before Wade melts into it. Your hand is still slowly exploring his body, running along the line of his shoulder and towards his upper arm. When you reach his bicep, you very obviously squeeze the muscle there, and you let out a pleased sigh as you begin groping in earnest.

He wants to turn to hide his face in the pillow, not sure how to react to all the positive attention and appreciation, but you catch him trying to turn away, and you kiss him deeper.

While one hand begins to explore his pecs and abs, your other hand scratches down his v-line, softly caressing the skin of his inner thighs before moving around to squeeze his ass.

Wade rewards you with a small whine, and you carefully trail a finger down his dick. You move in to whisper in his ear, “You’re so hot, I’m not forgiving you for hiding for so long.”

Trying to stifle the embarrassing moan that he knows will come out, he bites down on his lip hard, but you take the hand not teasing his cock to gently pry his lip away.

“From now on, I get to hear you, okay?” you say and Wade nods rapidly.

You take the moment you wrap your hand around the base of his cock, and after giving him a second to ready himself, you ask, “I’m going to use it now. Tell me if you want to stop.”

“Okay–” he responds before he feels the sweet sensation of you jerking him off coupled with your power. It’s a humming, dull feeling of pain resting in the background– almost like the sensation of being choked except it’s affecting his entire body. Wade feels like there’s a weight pinning down each of his limbs and it’s so freeing– so relaxing.

He sighs and turns his head to the side, letting out a deep moan when you up the pace of your hand and bring the other to fondle his balls.

“How is it?” you ask, sweat dripping down your brow at trying to control your ability. Sure, it’s  powerful and at times pretty horrifying, but Wade always loved how he was essentially immune. At the same rate you could destroy the flesh around you, he could heal his own right back. Just knowing that made him feel good, somehow, like he was made perfectly for you.

“It’s good– so good, I–” he nearly shouts, forgetting about the neighbors.

“Yeah, baby? What do you need?”

At hearing the pet name, he straight up whines as he tries to bury his hands in the sheets instead of his own thighs. 

“Not sure, umm, a little more–”

And he doesn’t know which god he has to thank for putting you on this planet, but he’s willing to pay them all a visit. You read him like he’s not some mess, some walking disaster nobody bothers paying attention to, and you give him what you know he needs.

From the base of his chin, you drag your hand in a deep scratch across his neck, chest, and stomach, your eyes watching the pink lines blend in with his scarred skin. It’s a flashing pain, sharp like being scalded and it feels so good mixed with the blunt feel of being under your power.

“I’m gonna–” he says, and of course, you seem to already know. He cums with a deep grunt, rutting his hips into your fist before he thrusts his head forward to kiss you again.

As soon as he comes down, he pulls away only slightly, just so he can say what he’s been wanting to say since he met you.

“Thank–”

You cut him off with another kiss, because sometimes, he really does need to shut up. 

[songmingisthighs]

Pitiful, You're Pitiful

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ch. v

group : ateez

pairing : aged up!wooyoung × aged up!reader

genre : angst, mature

word count : 5.2 k

warning : adultery, cheating, negative depiction of wooyoung, name calling, (y/n) finally growing a damn spine frfr

a/n : i'm finally updating this oh my god has it been so damn long I am saw sawrey for skipping updating in july. let's hope I can update twice on September or just not forget to update in september lmaoooooo i

buy me coffee ?

Ever since that day at the hospital, you felt like you've been living your life on autopilot. Scratch that, it felt like you were just watching your life happening like a movie. You couldn't quite feel anything and it was as if life's choices were already made for you.

Oh yeah. Choices.

As if that word meant anything to you.

You were reluctant to go back to see Wooyoung at the hospital as he had once again been put on a 24-hour observation period because he had exhibited signs of mental distraught on top of his back pain. Ironic. Your plan was to pack some of his shit up, throw it at him and tell him that he could finally go live with his whore and just make an exit from his life and maybe for once you could work your children into your decision instead of it going the other way.

But of course, life had a different plan because the devils must be making snowmen in hell.

Once your children were made aware of the situation their father was in (all thanks to San, one of Wooyoung's partners who struck up a conversation with Dayoung when he came by the house to drop off some things Wooyoung had requested from earlier in the morning), they immediately asked to be taken to him. At that moment you wanted to tell them that it wouldn't be possible since you and Wooyoung were splitting or separating or whatever the correct term was. But seeing their distraught face and hearing them beg you broke your heart, it was obvious that you couldn't break their hearts at that moment. So you relented, you took them to the hospital the next day, allowing them to skip school against your better judgment. You can see how stereotypes about children being spoiled after their parents divorced came to be.

Wooyoung was honestly surprised to see you through his door. He had thought that you would never show your face again but there you stood in front of him, nearly bringing tears to his eyes. But before he could say anything (nothing you wanted to hear anyway), you raised a hand and told him the situation, including the fact that your children knew nothing and that you weren't planning on telling them until the two of you could sit them down together and have a proper discussion when the time is right, so until then, you promised to remain civil as long as he promised to do the same and also not involve his affair partner with their children yet. Wooyoung attempted to protest because he felt like he needed to let you know that he was well on his way to breaking up with her before the incident and he had even told her to not come to the hospital and to not visit him at all. Unfortunately, you didn't want to hear what he had to say and you simply opened the door to let your children in, rushing to their father with tears in their eyes from being so worried.

During the whole visit, you stayed in the far corner, looking at your children interacting with their father for a good hour before you suddenly left the room. You came back with one of Wooyoung's gigantic Prada travel bags, plopping it on his bed before instructing your children that their dad needed to rest. They had attempted to bargain with you, telling you that they weren't going to school anyway so it wouldn't hurt if they were to stay and take care of their father. It astounded you that Wooyoung had the audacity to tell them that they'd have plenty of time with him when he come home. It was one of the rare times your anger took over you but you let slip that Wooyoung would not come home with you. You immediately regretted saying that.

"What do you mean dad's not coming home with us? He's sick, mom," Dayoung scoffed, tightening her grip on Wooyoung's arm angrily. Still, you stood your ground, "I... Am not equipped to care for a sick man. He hurt his back again after three weeks of me taking care of him so obviously someone else could take care of him," you cleverly took a jab at the bitch he had been with and Wooyoung was well aware of it as seen from the way his face grew red and his eyes started to well up with tears. Unfortunately for you, Woohyun saw this and he immediately climbed up to his dad's bed, frantically wiping his tears, "Daddy don't cry!" he whimpered, and he too started tearing up seeing his dad with tears in his eyes and seeing how much his son loved him, Wooyoung started crying as well, overwhelmed from the way his children cared for him which pushed his guilt into its maximum level because he had finally realized the other people he had hurt with his inexcusable decision.

You were very much aware of why Wooyoung was crying and again, you couldn't help but let your feelings overtook you as you rolled your eyes. Dayoung, seeing you reacting the way you did, took a big offence since she had clearly seen you with Yunho and based off of the wrong conclusion she drew, she took your behaviour as you trying to leave Wooyoung for his own friend. But of course, she couldn't reveal her knowledge just yet.

"Mom, how could you be so cruel?" she spat, "I swear, if something happens to dad because you wouldn't take him in because you're so selfish, I will never forgive you," she declared.

And that was how you ended up spending the next 4 days sleeping on the couch with Wooyoung sleeping in your bed. The man who broke your heart slowly started to break your back in a new way, a way unlike he had done a long time ago. The time when you both were still in love. The time when it was all still good.

"Thank you."

A voice broke you out of your trance and when you looked around, you saw Wooyoung leaning against the bathroom door, looking somewhat bashfully at the floor before his eyes moved to yours from the mirror. Unfortunately for him, you immediately shifted your gaze to the pile of towels you were folding and storing into the cabinet.

"For letting me stay here," he finished, offering you a small smile as a gesture of goodwill as if you were expecting him to thank you. You'd very much like to say that his gesture meant nothing to you and that you no longer felt anything for him. What's more infuriating was the smile he gave you was still the mirror image of the boyish grin that managed to charm you into trying yourself to him, it was the same boyish grin that made your stomach flutter even at that moment, despite him hurting you and betraying you. You hated it. You hated him for making you feel like that and you hated yourself for letting yourself feel like that.

You cleared your throat, willing yourself to hold your emotions at bay despite feeling like breaking down out of sadness and frustration. "Don't thank me, Wooyoung," Wooyoung felt his stomach drop from the way you called his name out and it instinctively made him swallow the lump in his throat, "If you must thank anyone, thank your children. Particularly your daughter whom I'd have to admit is quite the master extortionist and manipulator, I'd wonder more about where she inherited those traits if I'm not more concerned that she has what it takes to be a politician one day," you said, avoiding looking at Wooyoung with absolute determination which hurt him but he had to admit he absolutely deserved. But he didn't want to push his pity party on you so he swallowed his feelings and stepped into the bathroom, "You... I don't think the couch would be a very comfortable place to sleep in and you've been at it for four days so," you cut him off with a scoff, "I can say with absolute confidence that the couch was very uncomfortable for several good night's rest, especially considering the fact that after the torture, I still have to cater to your children and also you." That time you really wanted to drive in the hostility to let him know that you definitely did not let him stay out of the goodness of your heart. "Well you could've joined me in our bed," he sighed, saying the words as if he didn't know what he was saying and the gravity of it all.

But if he was oblivious to his words then the glare you gave him once you turned around conveyed all the feelings you reserved for him. "You know damn well why I couldn't have, Wooyoung," you spat, shoving the towels into the cabinet harshly as you sped up your work so you could get out of the room faster. "We might be fighting and all, (y/n) but if it's costing you your rest and your wellbeing then-" "Fighting? You think we're-" You held yourself from screaming at him and pushed past him to peek outside, wanting to make sure that neither one of your kids were nearby to hear the conversation. Wooyoung took this as you leaving the room to not talk to him so he was surprised when you turned back to push him inside the bathroom, this time with you near the door.

"Get this into your head, Wooyoung, we didn't fight, we didn't have a disagreement, it wasn't a misunderstanding between us, you fucking CHEATED on me with the first doe-eyed slut bitch who was willing to open her legs and break up a family probably because she was just so stupid and deluded enough to think that she could make her own family with you, so no, I couldn't share that bed or other beds or any other surface where one could rest on with you because you have ruined me, Wooyoung, you have ruined our marriage, and you have ruined my inner peace so all you could do now is get the fuck better so I can either kick you out or leave without being manipulated by anyone just because you're physically injured when I'm absolutely dead. You killed me, you killed my soul. You and that whore." you spat before turning and leaving him in the bathroom as quickly as you could so he couldn't stop you. Tears were brimming in his eyes as he let the words you hurled at him pierce his heart but he couldn't even complain. After all, he hurt you a million times worse so he had no excuse for himself.

You rushed to the kitchen, the only place you could think of to cool down and not just because you downed a tall glass of iced water that did nothing for your anguish. To make things worse, as you were still trying to calm yourself, your daughter came strolling in on her phone, being absolutely clueless over your distress.

"Hey Mom, can we order that soup from that place Dad likes for dinner? He seems rather down and y'know... Flimsy lately, I just want him to get his strength back."

Oh, how you wanted to ask her why she cared so much for her dad but she couldn't spare common decency to you. By all means you were not a vindictive person nor were you petty. But God, at that moment you wanted to turn around and ask her, "What about me? What about what I like? What about what I need? What about how I've been broken for months now because your father is a cheating son of a bitch?" Unfortunately, you were not your husband. You were not selfish. You were too good even to those who had betrayed you and then some.

"Mom?" She called, an eyebrow raised along with her face from her phone when she didn't hear you answer her. Sighing, you immediately gather yourself to make your leave quickly, "We can talk about this later, I need to pick up Woohyun from the Academy, his class is ending soon."

Dayoung didn't find that answer acceptable so she pressed, "No way, you'll be gone for a while and if we 'talk' about it later, Dad would have to wait to eat and that would be bad for someone who's sick!" "I really can't talk right now sweetie, I promise I just need to go now," you said, turning around to make your leave only to see Dayoung in your way, glaring at you. "Why are you rushing to go to the Academy?" It was such a confusing question because while the answer is easy and you were sure she even knew but her tone made it seem like she was alluding to another meaning. You opened your mouth to answer but she beat you to it, "Who are you rushing to see, Mom? Is it Uncle Yunho? Are you rushing so you could spend more time with him? Perhaps you're hoping to get more hugs from him or maybe something more?" The accusation dropped on you like a thousand tons and your jaw slacked from surprise, "Mind your tone, young lady. What are you trying to say?" "I saw you and Uncle Yunho hugging in front of our house. Mind telling me what all of that was?"

In your daughter, you saw a glimpse of your husband and it infuriated you. Her defiance, her stubbornness, her instinct to pursue the truth. While all of that might be good in life when applied properly, you couldn't help but be sure that your girl had crossed a line with you.

"I don't need to talk to you about that and you don't need to know more than the fact that it was nothing, it was between me and my friend and your tone is disrespectful so I would suggest you drop this attitude RIGHT NOW," you didn't mean to sound so harsh and you felt bad when Dayoung's bottom lip quivered before she dashed out of the kitchen, going God knows where. A tired sigh escaped your lips, you truly were under a lot of pressure and even though you were stressed, even though you were emotional, you shouldn't have snapped at your daughter like that. You knew you had to make it up to her but at that moment, you really do need to go get Woohyun so you simply grabbed your bag and your keys and left the house.

Meanwhile, Wooyoung jumped slightly when Dayoung came barging into his room, huffy and her face all red. His eyebrows furrowed in confusion seeing her in such a state. "Dayoung, what ha-" "How do you stand her?" she asked, cutting Wooyoung off. "What?" "How can you stand Mom? She's such a bitch," she hissed, wiping the tears off her cheek.

Wooyoung was taken aback at the language Dayoung used to describe you. "Hey, don't talk about your mother like that," Wooyoung scolded, voice firm and he stood up from his bed, "I didn't raise you to use such language on your mom." "But she IS a bitch!" Dayoung screeched, "You don't know what she's been doing behind your back, Dad. God, she's so manipulative, you don't even know!" Wooyoung felt his body vibrate with anger because he couldn't let his own daughter talk about you like that. "You drop this, Jung Dayoung, you drop this right now because you don't know what you're talking about and I'm not willing to listen to you talk smack about your own mother," he warned in a low voice. Usually, when Wooyoung spoke to her like this, Dayoung would drop it and say sorry, wanting to go back to her dad's good graces. But not this time, not when she felt that her father had been wronged by you. "Oh Dad, believe me, I know A LOT of stuff. For example, I know that there is stuff going on between Mom and Uncle Yunho," Dayoung said pointedly.

There was something that was like a tug on his heart hearing your name and Yunho's in a sentence that was put in such a way. But he knew that you were not like that and his daughter shouldn't talk about her own mom like that. "Jung Dayoung, I'm warning you, drop this right now," he sternly said. Despite seeing the seriousness in her dad's eyes, Dayoung pressed on, "You don't think I noticed that there's something going on between you two this past couple of months? The tension is palpable and don't even get me started on Mom sleeping on the couch and saying that it was because you needed the space to heal. WAKE UP DAD, MOM'S CHEATING ON YOU!" she yelled out.

"SHE COULDN'T BE CHEATING ON ME BECAUSE I WAS THE ONE WHO CHEATED ON HER!" Wooyoung yelled louder, causing Dayoung to jump back in shock not just because of his volume but also because of the information Wooyoung just revealed. The moment the words left Wooyoung's mouth, it felt like cold water was splashed on him. Harshly. But he couldn't take it back, he couldn't go back from this.

"I... Cheated on your mother... And then she found out. She told me she found out that day I got hurt because..." Wooyoung paused, suddenly deciding that he shouldn't tell Dayoung that he was with his side piece when you found out. Not that it helped because Wooyoung's sudden reluctance to finish his sentence was a dead giveaway. "I was the asshole in this situation and (y/n)- your mother has been sleeping on the couch because she couldn't bear sharing a bed with me but you and Woohyun had asked me to stay so she held it in. She did what she was asked and she did it despite her own personal apprehension. She loves you so much that she'd rather suffer silently rather than disappointing you and Woohyun." The more Wooyoung spoke of your action and about your altruism, the more he realized how much he fucked up by cheating on you. He had gotten everything he wanted from you, heck you put it on a silver, golden, platinum platter stacked over one another and when it got hard for you, when you needed him the most, he took your kindness and love for granted and pursued the suddenly missing 5% from you. He hated himself. And by the look Dayoung gave, it seem like he isn't the only one.

For the first time ever, Dayoung looked at her father with such hurt and disappointment that even Wooyoung could taste the hatred on his tongue.

"So your mother doesn't deserve to be called a bitch because she is far from one. She's a saint for putting you, me, and Woohyun over her own self so you will show her the respect she deserves. The respect we all owe her," he stated firmly but his voice shook around the part about you deserving respect. Wooyoung was sure that no one could think of him lower than he already thought of himself. Though people could easily conduct a poll.

With chest heaving, Dayoung took a step back, then another, then another until she reached the door and her hand reached for the handle, "Don't talk to me like that, I am nothing like you in this equation." As if she couldn't bear another second with her father, Dayoung left the room the same way she came in, by slamming the door. Wooyoung had braced himself to receive backlash but to hear his own daughter harshly stating how she was not like her father truly hurt him. But it was all deserved and he couldn't even complain.

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

It would appear that the day had been kinder to you than expected because you had planned on postponing coming home late by allowing Woohyun to take his time packing his stuff or taking him out to dinner and maybe get some dinner for Wooyoung and Dayoung at another place. Maybe another city. But as it appears, Woohyun's class ran longer than expected since they had a special guest teacher who came in from another country. Hearing this, you were about to leave the premises to wait in your car or go to a convenience store when you heard Seonghwa, one of Wooyoung's former dance crew mates turned business partner and teacher of the academy, called you up.

"Hey (y/n), how's it going?" He asked, beaming with happiness. Pissed that your friend cheated on me with one of your staff, you thought, "Good, Seonghwa. How are you? How's dating life?" you teased which made him roll his eyes, "Oh shut up, I should have settled down in my late 20s like you told me to. The girls who approach me only approach me because they have daddy issues and I don't know what to do with that information." Still better than my marriage I'd guess, you snarkily added in your head. "I was just about to step out for a bit until Woohyun finished his class, so..." You trailed off, trying to give him the hint that you were trying to get away but it simply went over his head. "Actually, I have some things for Wooyoung to look over, I know he's supposed to be back soon but these are just a couple of plans, budget details, and meeting minutes he can look over to catch up. I was planning to give it myself later tonight but since you're here, would it be okay for me to ask you to give them to him?" he smiled a bit too gleefully for your taste because you were in such a bad state. But you couldn't fault his nonchalance as he was not aware of the situation happening at home. So you nodded at Seonghwa, returning his smile though it wasn't half as genuine as his, "Sure, you can give it to me." "Great, thanks! Wait here, I'll go to the office and get them for you!" Seonghwa then jogged in the direction of the joint office in the back, leaving you at the waiting area where the receptionist is and also other students with their friends and some younger ones with their parents.

"Mrs. Jung?"

That voice froze you not just because you were surprised, but also because that voice was the one voice you didn't want to hear calling for you.

"Mrs. Jung!" Harin called before she jogged over to stand next to you, "Hello, it's nice seeing you again!" she smiled cheerfully which made you want to slap her face as hard as you could but you kept your composure. Even if the inner side of your cheek took the brunt to the point of nearly bleeding. You mustered all of the patience in your body to hum in acknowledgment and gave her the most neutral, polite smile you could give. "A-are you here alone? What are you doing at the Academy?" she asked. What bitch, you were hoping that Wooyoung's here too? And this is his academy that his kids have been part of since before you came here two years ago, I'm welcomed here unlike you in my fucking marriage. "Woohyun," you simply said before you averted your gaze, purposefully turning around in hopes that she'll get the hint and leave you before you maul her like a rabid cat. "I like Woohyun, he's so nice to me," Harin chuckled a bit too innocently for your liking due to the insinuation and the situation, "He always calls me pretty and compliments me. Of course, he's just a generally nice kid because even the other dancers like him. And of course, they also like Dayoung who's just so opinionated and strong and bright. They truly are the mirror image of their dad."

That was fucking it.

"Really!?" you snapped at her with a voice so sharp it should've turned her into ceviche. Harin jumped slightly from the sharpness of your tone as she looked at you in surprise, taking in how you were squinting your eyes at her in disbelief. "I-I'm sorry, wha-" you cut her stupid mouth off, not even wanting to hear her feigning confusion as the why you would react that way considering the fact that she had just acted like she knew your kids enough on top of having the nerve to talk all intimate-like about your husband. "You think you can talk to me that way about MY kids after everything?" "w-w- what did I say? I-I was just saying that I adore them," Harin tried to defend herself but your anger had made it seem like you doubled in size and you were towering over her. "And who do you think you are to adore my children?" it was obvious that you were no longer holding back your anger and while a part of you dreaded this, another felt glad that you were finally able to stand up for yourself. "I know everything, you slut," you sneered, taking a step closer to get a better look at the way her face fell, "I know you've been screwing my husband behind my back. He confirmed it to me."

By then you had caught the attention of the people around and you were sure that they had heard you but you didn't care. You stood over her, watching as she stuttered, looking as stupid as a fish out of water. "What? Nothing to say now? Nothing about my kids being the mirror image of the man you slept with multiple times and even shamelessly claimed to be your husband at the hospital?" you taunted, "You might have skipped this lesson in whore school, but when you see the wife of the man you're screwing, you blush, avert your eyes, and you scurry away like a roach, got it?" maybe you took it a step too far by humiliating her like that but you couldn't help the satisfied look on your face when she stared at you with reddened cheeks and a very displeased look on her face. The crowd gathering around you didn't make things any better for her because they were starting to whisper among themselves and you recognized some of them as the affluent stay-at-home moms whose husbands fall under the stereotypical cheating trope. So hearing you say all of that, they immediately started to look at Harin with disgust, and a small part of you, the evil part that was created due to hurt, took that as a win.

"Mommy?"

You turned around to see Woohyun standing not too far away from you with Seonghwa standing next to him, looking more surprised than your son who just looked concerned. Before you could react, Woohyun rushed to stand in front of you, glaring at Harin who looked at him with guilt. If you didn't know any better, you would've guessed that she was finally facing another innocent person who got affected by her selfishness. But you weren't as willing to consider her to have any semblance of humanity in her.

"Mommy, can we go home now?" Woohyun asked without looking at you but still keeping his glare on Harin. It was obvious to you that he was trying to distract you, trying to get you out of the uncomfortable situation which made you wonder about how much he knew or even understand. But you didn't want to hash it out in such a public place with him so you nodded and took his hand, automatically causing his attention to shift to you. "Yeah, of course, we can go home now sweetie. Have you gotten all of your things?" you asked in a tone so sweet that it caused Harin's spine to tingle from the palpable difference. It didn't help that once Woohyun turned away, he too, sported an innocent smile, nodding along and showing you his things that he had packed.

Turning around with Woohyun in tow, you shot Harin one last glare before stepping to face Seonghwa with a polite smile, "Is that the file you want to give my son of a bitch husband?" Seonghwa felt his knees buckle from fear but he tried his best to stabilize himself and smile at you, "Y-yeah, Wooyo-" The sudden shift to anger on your face when you heard your husband's name almost made Seonghwa shit his pants but he immediately corrected himself, "I-I mean, t-that son of a-a bitch, needs to review this and get back to me a-at, uh... YOUR earliest convenience?" your curtly nodded and offered him a polite smile whilst covering Woohyun's ears, "Thank you Seonghwa, and I'm sorry to have done this confrontation so publicly. It was not ideal but I was pushed to engage and since it's both out in the open and both it and my husband are hypocritical cowards who will not bring this up themselves, can I trust you to report this case to HR and see to it both of them get disciplinary action because it does break the inappropriate relationship rule and not to mention this could open you up to lawsuits should the bitch expand her reach and screw all of you as well? Thank you." Seonghwa immediately nodded his head and he was about to say something to comfort you but you had started your journey out of the academy, leaving Harin in the middle of the room, being pointed and whispered at by the people around, moms, and random people like other dancers and staff. Some had even fished out their phones and began to type away and Harin could only imagine that it was about her.

Humiliated, Harin was about to run away when a figure stepped out from the crowd and blocked her. She looked up to see Yunho staring at her with a less-than-pleased look on his face which terrified her because he was always the mood-maker.

"I think it would be best if you come with us to HR," he said in a low voice, briefly looking at Seonghwa who was immediately on his phone, looking distressed and frantic as he tried to get HR to immediately gather in the meeting room along with the other people who might be related.

Defeated, Harin hung her head and muttered under her breath, "That fucking bitch," she exhaled shakily which was easily heard by Yunho who clenched his jaw and with a tightly closed fist, hit the wall next to him hard enough that a loud BOOM echoed, surprising the people around who immediately dispersed whilst simultaneously causing Harin to cower.

"Mind your language because as of the moment (y/n) told Seonghwa hyung to report you to HR, anything and everything you said is a testament to your character and action and from what I'm seeing, you should not be calling (y/n) a bitch," he said through gritted teeth, forcing Harin to drop her face in absolute shame and simply followed when Yunho gestured for her to walk down the hallway (in shame).

"If I were you, I'd fire up my LinkedIn again because if you think Wooyoung would fight for you to stay, you'd end up wasting your time, his time, and frankly, everyone's time."

network :

@cultofdionysusnet @sandsofire @kflixnet @pirateeznet

taglist :

@atinyreads @strawberry-yeo @soobiverse @vixensss @smally97 @maidens-world @yunhoswrldddd @imcoenffl @nescaffei @miaatiny @showmehoseok @tmingi @wlv-asteria @sunwoosbaby @hyukssunflower @remi-young

@staytiny816 @dearinsaniiity @scentednerdenemy @melanchobtch

permalist :

@kodzukein @phenomenalgirl9 @skzatzloveismonsterous @memorymonster @surveilenceysystem @dreamlesswonder86 @maddiebabyxoxo @imababywolf @do-you-actually-care @marievllr-abg @ilsedingsx @wasteitonserendipity @bbymatz @noonaishere @honeyhwaaa @ateezourstars @yoonjunshi @yoongiigolden @camillelafaye @charreddonuts @kpopnightingale @starryunho @atinct @mirror-juliet @hyuckilstan @jayb17

[owliellder]

My Superstar

post RE4! Leon Kennedy x afab Musician! Reader

MDNI 18+

Description: Leon was a fan of you. It was a well kept secret, how much he enjoyed your music and watching you perform. A little bit of lying can get a man a long way.

Warnings: Not proofread, Porn w/ lots of plot, Unprotected p in v (stay safe), some minimal stalkerish behavior, vague mention of a PTSD-induced panic (it's very short), awkwardness

Tags: Strangers to lovers, post RE4! Leon, Dom! Leon, Sub! Reader, this can be considered slow burn (?), multiple instances of masturbation cause Leon is touch starved, praise kink, handjob, oral (m! and f! receiving), fingering, nipple play, inappropriate use of mama, grinding, cowgirl position, Leon manhandling the reader a bit, this man cannot keep his hands off of you!!

Word Count: 11k

Cross posted onto Ao3

Note: Spent days working on this. DAYS!! It's crazy that I can sit here at work all night, multiple nights in a row, and write smut.

Anyways, thank you for reading

ψ(｀∇´)ψ!

Leon Kennedy was one of the government's best agents; fighting horrors beyond the general public's comprehension like it was nothing at this point. He was only 28, yet he was rugged, stoic, and damn near emotionless. Every agent he's ever interacted with knew next to nothing about him. Outside of work, this man was an absolute enigma.

He stayed in a comfortable one bedroom, one bathroom apartment that was provided by the government. It was practically barren due to his line of work. What was the point of having anything if you're never there to enjoy it?

On the rare occasion Leon had more than a few weeks of quiet, he strictly kept to himself; declining invitations to go out and drink with his fellow agents, ordering in whenever he decided he was hungry, and even flat out ignoring anyone who approached him when he was performing his more domestic duties, like grocery shopping.

The blond had manners, sure, but he didn't want to entertain anyone's idea of him, especially the women. He was approached in that way often due to his muscular appearance and mysterious atmosphere. It was a bit of a pain for him to deal with. He just wanted to be left alone during his highly valued time away from agent work.

Leon looks and acts like the type of guy to just be a stick in the mud. He rarely ever indulged the other agents in his personal affects.

One evening while stuck doing paperwork from his last mission, the blond was dragged into a nearby conversation when one of the agents asked about his music taste. More specifically, if he preferred one music artist over another. All he did was shrug and said he didn't know the names, which stunned everyone involved in the conversation. When asked about not knowing two very popular artists, he even went so far as to say: "I don't listen to music."

Little did everyone know that Leon Kennedy was a filthy, dirty liar.

He listened to music, oh he did. This seasoned agent, who fought actual hellspawn, was a fan of you.

Actually, fan would be an understatement. He was a super fan.

Leon discovered your music a year ago while in a drunken stupor after he'd come back from Spain. He was in an incredibly tough spot mentally, physically too, and he just needed something to help with the constant feeling of dread clouding his thoughts. Amidst his drinking spree, he caught a glimpse of you when scrolling through TV channels.

The agent paused for a long moment before switching the channel back, his body lagging behind his brain. He was very wary at first, seeing as he really wasn't a music guy, but something about your voice drew him in further. Of course Leon blamed it on the massive amount of alcohol he'd drank, dismissing the tickling in his stomach with a shake of his head as he switched to a different channel.

From there, it spiraled.

Everywhere he went, he heard bits and pieces of you; the grocery store, in a car passing by that had its windows rolled down, even from the other agents occasionally when he got stuck doing paperwork late into the night. You were slowly taking over his thoughts, and though he seemed calm and collected on the outside, it was driving him insane.

Leon didn't understand why you were able to mess with him like this. It was so unfair. He'd managed to keep his personal life the way he wanted it, the one thing he had control over, and now he owned all of your CD's and even a t-shirt for god's sake...

He indulged himself in everything that was you; the way you smiled in the few music videos you had, the nervous habits you had when he was able to watch your interviews, old and new, and even the way you dressed. It had him almost browsing similar clothes at the store, his gaze lingering for just a moment too long as he wondered if you'd like something like that.

The whole thing made Leon feel gross, perverted even, especially when you crept into his thoughts late at night. Turning down other women's advances meant he never really got any action, never really feeling the need to touch himself either, so he found himself a little more pent up than he originally thought he'd be. The smallest of thoughts about you had him straining against his pants at work.

Yes, embarrassingly, he'd masturbated to the thought of you. Multiple times at this point. He felt terrible, but what you didn't know couldn't hurt you, right? He could live with the shame.

The agent made sure not a soul knew about his growing obsession for you and your sound, that much he could control.

Despite feeling incredibly emasculated, you did well by him. He didn't drink as much as he used to and he spent just a little more time each day off making his apartment cozier, though that's not the craziest part. That title belongs to the fact that whenever you were brought up at work, he rather subtly joined in on conversations willingly. He acted uninterested, didn't even add to the conversation really, but it was an opportunity for him to learn about you that he wasn't going to pass up.

From that, Leon learned that you were doing a concert in this city next month! That seemingly insignificant bit of information that was casually mentioned by one of the other agents nearly knocked the fucking wind out of him.

"Yeah, they're going to be in town for a week or something." One agent spoke up, shrugging before he tilted his disposable coffee cup towards their slips to take a small sip. Leon managed to collect himself internally to reply, clearing his throat quietly beforehand. "This isn't a big city. What're they doing here?"

In an attempt to seem casual, he rested his left arm rested on the back of a chair as he held his own cup of coffee in his right hand, taking a sip from it.

"Dunno." The agent responded simply, shrugging a bit. The topic quickly shifted after that, leaving Leon to mull over the simple tidbit he'd learned.

The next few weeks were grueling for the blond, feeling as if time was purposefully slowing down on him. His anticipation was growing by the minute.

He had managed to finagle himself a backstage pass along with a VIP ticket the second he made it home to his personal computer after that conversation with his coworkers, thank you special government access. The printed ticket and pass taunted him from where it sat propped up against the bottom of the computer monitor.

Leon kept the ticket and pass somewhere he would remember them, somewhere they couldn't get lost when he had to rush to work in a haste, which was a common occurrence for the agent.

The last week of the month was when you were going to be in town for your concert. Thursday, to be specific. It was relatively easy for Leon to play off his absence at work, having called out sick for the entire week so no one would suspect anything. Honestly, everyone was more concerned since he never got sick and even on the rare occasion he was, he never called out.

It made Leon feel just slightly guilty when a few of his fellow agents decided to send him get well cards... he'll worry about that later.

Every day until Thursday decided to roll around, Leon was practically vibrating in his apartment. He was so worried he would somehow miss the concert, so he decided to occupy himself by scrubbing the damn place top-to-bottom. It helped him release that ever-building tension he was accruing as he oh so patiently waited.

Wednesday night, he couldn't sleep, the anticipation of this one single event made it hard for him to sleep ever since he learned about it. But with the promise of seeing you tomorrow, he was actually trembling in his bed.

The man had tried his best to control his urges regarding you, but tonight was really getting to him. Just to relax, he thought, it can't hurt. A common thought in his mind.

Leon lost track of time and spent over 2 hours edging himself, the adrenaline from knowing he'd get to see you in person, be in the same building as you, had him biting down on his knuckles as he roughly fisted his cock. He at least still had the dignity to keep himself quiet, mostly not wanting his neighbors to hear how needy he was. He also didn't want your name to accidentally slip out of his mouth.

God, the things you did to him. All he had to do was simply imagine you were the one stroking his cock and he was gone, pathetically whimpering into his hand. You didn't even know he existed, but hopefully you would after that concert. He wished he could show you how much he appreciated you one day soon.

After the agent came with your name on the tip of his tongue, he decided to give up on sleep. He was wide awake, now needing a shower after making a sizable mess all on his hand, exposed abs, and the blankets that had bunched up near his groin.

Only 10 minutes later, he came again, this time in the shower.

Leon checked himself over numerous times during the hours leading up to your concert; dressing in a shirt a size too small to show off his muscles, spritzing himself with just the right amount of a cologne that he totally didn't buy because you said you liked those certain perfume and cologne notes once before, even going so far as to make sure not a single strand of hair on his head was out of place.

The anxiety got to him and, of course, he left almost 5 hours early to stand in line at the stadium you'd be performing at. He found himself felt awkward standing by himself in line, almost second guessing his decision to even be here. Almost.

Once the employees at the stadium started checking tickets and leading people inside, the blond began to tremble with anticipation. This once stoic, cold man was now reduced to nothing more than a nervous fangirl, his lips pulled tight as his ticket and pass were checked and he was lead through a set of double doors. Despite all his years living and working in this area, Leon had never been inside this place. Hell, he didn't even know there was a stadium here.

The VIP ticket granted him one of the best spots in his opinion. He wasn't right up against the stage, but he was close enough to where he'd be in the crowd that got to interact with you personally.

Once again, Leon was feeling awkward as he sat stiffly next to people he didn't know. Hopefully he can grow a pair quick so he doesn't make an absolute fool of himself in front of you.

The crowd waited for a good 30 minutes or so, probably to give everyone enough time to settle, before the lights dimmed, causing everyone to cheer loudly. The man tapped his fingers against his muscular thigh anxiously, attempting to get his breathing under control.

He did not like being crowded like this, but he had to put up with it for just a couple hours in order to see your entire concert. He could handle that...

No he couldn't.

Only a few minutes after you entered the stage, everything got to him fast. The screaming, the lack of any form of personal space, and his climbing body temperature caused him to flee as casually as physically possible. Leon never considered that he wouldn't be able to handle such a loud and crowded environment.

He pushed his way forward, flashing his backstage pass to one of the security guards standing in front of the temporary fencing put up. They moved the fence slightly to let him through, to which he speed-walked his way towards the bathrooms, following the signs that led the way.

Thankfully the bathroom was empty since the concert had just started. The man chose to go into the family bathroom since it the door had a lock and he didn't want anyone walking in on him while he calmed himself.

For fucks sake, he can do this! He knows he can, he has to. He bought the damn ticket and pass, he needed to see you.

After giving himself awhile to calm down, Leon eventually walked out of the bathroom, ready to go back in and claim his seat once more. The sound of music echoed through the large hallway that surrounded the area you were performing, causing his nerves to spike again for just a brief moment.

He took a deep breath and walked over to another security guard that stood by the set of doors he walked out of previously, using his pass once more to get back in since it led through the fenced off area.

The second the blond walked through, he froze, his eyes landing on you up on the stage. Your voice was so clear now, the way you moved and sang with a smile causing the corners of his lips to peak up slightly.

He just couldn't keep his eyes off of you, making his walk back to his seat incredibly drawn out. Seeing you at every angle possible at the moment was making his heart flutter, and shamefully, his dick twitch. He was grateful anything below his torso was obstructed by everyone jumping and dancing around him.

The lyrics to your songs resonated with Leon like nothing before, your proximity making it feel like you were singing directly to him. For him.

The concert lasted a little longer than either you or Leon had anticipated due to a random technical issue with the mic you were wearing.

It was funny to you, the slight and very short lasting hiccup caused you to joke with one of your bandmates, your hushed voice and laugh being picked up by their mic. God, Leon could listen to your laugh for hours.

Regardless of any mistake, your concert was nothing less than perfect to the man. To him, you could do no wrong, that much was clear by the way he zeroed in on you and you alone for the entire duration of the performance.

After thanking the audience with a grin and a wave, you exited the stage with your bandmates and retreated backstage to shed that post-concert adrenaline. All those eyes watching you? Yeah, that'll always be nerve-wracking, no matter how many times you do it.

You settled next to your drummer on a particularly uncomfortable couch, your guitar sitting propped up on a stand not too far away. The downtime after a concert was always very appreciated, considering you lacked any sort of energy after the adrenaline finally wore off. Your voice had grown hoarse, throat now sore, and ears ringing from the volume of the music earlier.

You wanted to have a chance to collect yourself properly before you met up with anyone that had a backstage pass, which was normally reserved for people actually working the event. You liked to keep it easy for you and everyone involved, which meant you only ever green-lit a very small number of them to be sold to the general public.

As much as you loved your fans, you wanted to keep your after-concert relaxing at a maximum. This kind of life was stressful, as fun as it was. You didn't want to come at your fans' throats because you were too exhausted to answer questions. The last thing you wanted was to get mad at people who were just excited to meet you.

Luckily for you, it doesn't seem very many people were able to acquire a backstage pass. Most were left to event workers, it seemed. A few stragglers had made it backstage with the help of security to get a picture and have you and your bandmates sign a poster or a shirt.

One final man wandered backstage an hour after the concert had ended, one you didn't notice as your exhaustion was really presenting at this point. Your bassist was the first to notice Leon, righting themselves from their spot leaning against the wall to greet him with a handshake.

The drummer and keyboardist followed suit, slowly leading the agent over to where you now sat on the floor, back against the couch since it had grown too uncomfortable for you.

You were nudged by your bassist, causing you to grumble and open your eyes to look up at whoever decided to rouse you. Catching sight of Leon prompted you to quickly stumble upwards onto your feet.

Smiling awkwardly, you reached your hand out to shake his hand, which he gladly accepted with a tender smile of his own.

"Leon." he stated simply, his eyes lidded as he looked into yours. "Very happy to finally meet you and your band."

This man was fucking gorgeous and he had the voice of a pornstar. Maybe he was a pornstar? Who knows, you weren't one to judge, especially not someone who's looking at you like that.

You introduced yourself, rather breathlessly as you'd stood yourself up too fast. "I'm sorry, we're all a little gross from the show.." you laughed out nervously, pulling your hand back from him to wipe against your shirt after realizing how sticky from sweat you were.

Leon laughed a low laugh with you, his eyes quickly raking over your figure before making their way back up to yours. "It's no problem, I'd be a little confused if you weren't gross after that performance. It was amazing, by the way."

He followed you and your bandmates over to a circular table sitting near the corner of the room, accepting a seat after everyone sat down and gestured for him to do the same. The blond really wanted to talk to you alone, but getting to talk to you at all was a feat in his books right now, and getting to sit across from you was more than enough.

"Thank you, Leon. We're very happy you enjoyed the show." Your drummer spoke, giving Leon a quick smile. Everyone else agreed, including you with a quiet, tired chuckle.

Leon was surprisingly good at hiding his hard on, but your hoarse voice and tired, disheveled look had his thoughts leading a less than innocent path. It was hard for him to focus on anyone else.

The agent asked general, boring questions that the band was asked almost every time they encountered a fan, though he was a lot more casual about it.

He kept giving you these looks that you couldn't quite describe. It almost seemed like he was eyeballing you for a reason. You were used to getting a bit more attention since you were the main face of the band, but wow he was really giving you some questionable looks. Not that you minded, of course. Hell, you started giving him your own coy glances here and there.

After about 10 minutes of general chatter, Leon began to single you out in questions; asking about your guitar, how you come up with your lyrics, and how you learned to sing, all the while staring at you with those half-lidded eyes of his.

You answered as best as you could, taking note of a smirk tugging at his lips. He'd noticed you blushing, his low tone and staring effecting you in your tired state.

You couldn't quite place it, and as cliche as it was, he seemed different to you. Leon wasn't like most of the other fans you'd met over the years, he seemed so nonchalant about everything.

This type of behavior was obvious when it came from younger fans. You and your band mates have dealt with a fair share of teenage crushes, but having a grown man display the same kind of mannerisms was strange. Not in a bad way, though.

In your defense, it was a bit refreshing to know you were desirable in that sense. You'd grown so busy with music that you just haven't worked to put yourself out there. Plus, there's always that inkling that anyone who would try their hand at you was just out for the money and fame, not to mention that handling a relationship with the spotlight always watching is really difficult. It can wear on it.

As everyone stood up from the table, your bandmates shook Leon's hand and said their thank you's again before beginning to make their way to a door where a couple security guards stood ready to lead them out to the tour bus. You waved them on before walking over to grab your guitar from the stand it was on.

"You're not gonna go with them?" Leon asked quietly, watching you from where he stood next to the table. He pointed over his shoulder with his thumb as your bandmates walked out, his eyebrows furrowed slightly with confusion.

"Oh, I just have to put this away before I follow them out..." You yawned, grabbing the guitar case that wasn't too far away from you before sitting yourself on the floor, opening the case up. You began to examine the guitar for any damage that went unnoticed during the concert.

Leon nodded and moseyed over to you, standing a couple feet away before leaning over just a bit to watch you as you looked over your guitar, giving a small smile once more.

"You know," he started, voice almost a rumble as he spoke. His eyebrows raised as he turned his focus down a little further to look at you. "...you really were the star of the show."

You placed the guitar in it's case before looking up at him, having tilting your head upwards since he was currently towering over you. You smiled, huffing out a laugh through your nose. "Please, I wouldn't sound very good if it wasn't for my band.."

Leon clicked his tongue, bending over a little more to get closer to you. He was looking at you with those same half-lidded eyes from before, his voice lowering to a hushed tone. "I'm being serious. All I could focus on was you. And that voice of yours? Wow.."

He was now giving you a bit more of a serious look, though he still had the faintest smile. Your face relaxed with his words, smile widening ever so slightly. He spent the time to gauge your reaction before continuing to speak, moving next to you before crouching down.

"I know I'm just a fan, but I'd really like to see you again sometime." Leon turned his head away from you to look down at the floor, fiddling with his fingers nervously after resting his arms on his knees.

Now it was his turn to blush, his sudden proximity to you bringing out a more bashful side to him. He hadn't felt this way in years, so he wasn't quite sure how to act.

You followed him with your head as he crouched next to you, never moving your gaze away from him. Normally you'd never let a fan get this close to you for so long, but Leon didn't give off any sort of threatening energy. If anything, he just seemed like a nervous kid asking his crush to hold his hand during school. It was endearing having such a well-built, handsome man acting this way for you.

You averted your gaze for just a moment to zip up the guitar case before quickly looking back at the blond sitting next to you. "Do you have a pen?"

His eyes shot up from his lap to meet yours, his eyebrows raised up again. "What?" he asked, his voice a little too loud before he caught himself with a wipe of his palm across his lips. "Sorry- what did you say?" He must've been zoned out after admitting to wanting to see you again.

"Do you have a pen? Or a sharpie?" You repeated yourself with a gentle tone, eyes crinkling with your smile as he looked over at you. "Oh! Oh, yeah.. yeah yeah, I do.." He muttered, quickly standing up so he could dig through his pockets with both his hands. After a few seconds he pulled out a pen, clicking it a couple times before holding out the pen to you.

You nodded with a giggle, gently taking the pen from him. You grabbed his hand and flipped it so his palm was facing up, drawing a couple quick circles on your own arm to make sure the pen worked before carefully scribbling your number out onto his open palm.

Leon focused all his brain power on keeping his hand as still as possible for you, watching you intently as you wrote on his hand. He never thought it would've been this easy, imagining he'd have to follow you to at least a few other cities before even getting a chance at this.

Once you finished writing, you placed the pen back into the same hand. You held his hand with both of yours, closing his fingers for him before patting them. Every single nerve ending in his hand was tingling with your touch, his eyes wide as he turned his gaze from his hand and back up to your face where his eyes met yours.

"I have to go, but don't be afraid to call, okay?" You slowly slid your hands off of his and stood up, grabbing the handle on the guitar case. "I'm easily reachable."

Leon pulled his hand close to his chest, opening his fingers to sneak a glance at your number. He balled his hand right back up before shoving it into his pocket, like he'd somehow lose it if he didn't keep a tight hold on it. He started to speak, voice cracking a bit which caused him to clear his throat before attempting to speak again. "Yeah, okay.. yeah.."

The agent was reduced to nothing more than his nerves, taking a shaky breath as he gave you a crooked smile. You nodded in acknowledgement, blush dusting your cheeks again as you stood awkwardly next to him.

You pointed towards the door before starting to shuffle away from him, muttering out a quiet "It was nice to meet you, Leon.."

You take quiet note on how nice his cologne smelled as you walked in front of him to the door.

"It was nice to meet you too, sweetheart." Leon responded, his shyness immediately falling away as he watched you leave, allowing a security guard to lead him to the main arena so he could walk out to the main parking lot where his car was.

He slid into his car and sat for a moment before leaning his head against the steering wheel, arms above his head as he laughed. It almost felt fake, but when he angled his head to look at the number written on his hand again, he knew it wasn't.

The man almost crashed 3 times on the short drive home, getting honked at numerous times as he sat unfocused at traffic lights when they turned green. He even sat at a stop sign waiting for it to turn green for a whole minute until he realized that it was not going to be turning green.

At least he made it back to his apartment building alive, that's all that mattered to him right now. He wanted to enjoy this moment of euphoria before his own exhaustion caught up to him, calmly walking into his apartment in case any of his neighbors saw him. Once his front door was closed and locked, he scrambled into his office to write down your number onto a piece of paper. He wanted to make sure the numbers were at least legible, seeing as his hands were trembling.

Afterwards, he moved to his bedroom to sit on the edge of his bed, having taken off his jacket and shirt, leaving them both abandoned on the floor somewhere in his room. The entire night was finally setting in for him, his breathing turning ragged as he leaned forward to place his elbows on his knees.

The blond shared the same analogy you had, feeling like an awkward teen all over again with how he could barely calm himself from such a simple interaction.

Leon kept himself on the edge of his bed, sitting up only slightly to pull his cock out from his boxers and unzipped pants, rock solid and incredibly sensitive. You'd been so close to him, and god the way you looked and sounded after giving the concert your all made it so easy for Leon to paint a picture of what you'd look like after he got his hands on you.

He's been hard for hours at this point, not even caring to undress fully before jerking himself off with the same hand that you'd written your number on. He was so thankful his precum didn't stain through to his pants during that whole ordeal, he wouldn't have known what to do if you knew about his problem.

The pen smudged as he wet his hand with his precum, the liquid smearing the ink all along his hand and dick. He didn't care, it'll wash off, he just needed to take care of himself right now. He wanted you, and now he knew you wanted him too, to some extent.

Leon closed his eyes, moving his left hand down to fondle his balls as he stroked himself faster, doing his best to imagine it was you playing with him like this. Whimpering with every breath, he started to wonder how you'd handle him: Your hands were a lot smaller than his, would you have to use two hands to stroke him properly? Would you touch his balls like this? Bet you'd be so willing to suck his cock, fuck, you probably taste so good too. Eating you out would be so fun, hearing you moan out his name with that pretty voice of yours-

It only took about a minute for him to cum onto the floor, eyebrows furrowed and panting heavily as he gripped the base of his cock tightly, feeling it throb with each string of cum that pumped out.

Wonder if you're on birth control..

Leon had to return to work the next week, feigning the flu in its final stages to keep up with his little white lie. No one questioned him, only offering smiles and the occasional "glad you're feeling better".

He didn't really do his work to the best of his ability, his main focus being when would be the right time to call you.

Embarrassingly, the agent went out and bought a flip phone since he didn't have his own phone. He hadn't needed his own phone before, using only his work phone when anything work related came up.

He didn't want to risk putting your number into your work phone and he figured having your number was a good time to invest in a personal phone.

Now, Leon had to gamble with the idea of calling you. Obviously he'll wait until he's home, but it's hard to think of anything else when you're only a button away.

His aloofness was normal to his coworkers, even more explainable considering he was "sick" last week. He was incredibly thankful no one bothered him with extra work tonight.

After work, he was sat on his couch, staring down at his new phone while the TV was on, flashing only colors in his periphery since he'd muted it. It was only 5pm, he was contemplating calling you. He wanted to hear your voice again, but he didn't know if it was too late in the evening or not.

You said you were easily reachable, so it's all or nothing, he guessed.

He pushed through his nerves, pressing the call button before slamming the phone against his ear with a slight wince. Every ring caused him to tense up.

On the final ring you finally picked up, breathing out a quick "Hello?" into the phone. Leon sat there frozen, sucking in a harsh breath before letting out a cough.

"Hey-.. Uh, hey. It's uh, it's Leon.."

There was a bit of a pause on the other end before you responded, voice cheerful despite sounding out of breath.

"Oh hey! I was wondering when I'd hear from you! How are you?"

"Uh.. I've been alright... how about you?"

Leon patted his thigh with his left hand, mentally chastising himself for his voice cracking again.

"I'm doing good, uh, I'm fighting a spider, so.."

You breathed into the phone with a laugh, causing Leon to smile and relax a bit as you kept the conversation alive.

"Oh yeah, spiders are kind of evil. Need me to ward it off?"

"I mean, I would take you up on that offer, but I'm already about 100 miles away from your city at this point."

Leon cursed internally, turning his head away from the phone to sigh where you could hear it.

"I appreciate it, though. This thing is nasty."

Your voice pulled him back to the phone, bringing a smile back to his face.

"You should get uh... that drummer of yours to help you. Two against one."

"Everyone is out at dinner. I'm all alone in this, Leon."

Your dramatic tone made him chuckle, leaning his head back against the couch.

"Okay, well, I'm with you in spirit."

The laugh you emitted only egged Leon on further.

"How long are you gonna be in the next city? If uh.. if you don't mind me asking."

"For a few days. It's our last city on the tour we're doing, then we go back to LA."

The agent nodded silently with a hum, his confidence slowly coming back to him. He needed to put his intentions out there.

"Would you mind if I drove out and took you to dinner tomorrow?"

He's now sweating bullets. There was another brief pause before you responded, the silence causing him to tense up once more.

"...I normally wouldn't accept something like that... but, you know what, I'll take you up on that."

Leon let out a breath he didn't know he was holding, now leaning forward with a relieved look. You could hear the relief in his voice too.

"Uh- awesome! Okay, I'll find somewhere nice to take you."

You two said your goodbye's and hung up after you told the agent which city and hotel you were staying at.

He took it upon himself to go into his office and search up the location on his computer, easily memorizing the path to where you were since it mostly just involved following a freeway the majority of the way.

It took awhile for Leon to calm down after that call, now busy anticipating his journey tomorrow to see you. It'll be easy to call out of work again, saying the sickness flared back up or something along those lines. Anything to see your pretty face again.

He spent the night with himself, finding himself unable to fall asleep once more, just like the night before your concert. The man had never been or felt this desperate before, chasing some person he barely knew over a silly crush. Okay, it was more than a crush if he had to be honest with himself.

Planning on leaving early, he was more than frustrated when he finally fell asleep close to 4am. He wanted to scope out good restaurants and nice places to park, if it came down to that. The hopeful bastard.

Groggy, Leon got himself up only 2 hours after he'd fallen asleep, drinking the coffee he'd made himself on the stove days ago. It tasted stale, but it would have to do.

He definitely sounded the part when calling out sick again, which was accepted without question.

Wanting to make sure he looked his best even after a long car ride, he showered and shaved his stubble right before leaving, making sure to bring his cologne, hairbrush, and gum.

The drive was boring, traffic irritated Leon, but he eventually made it to the city you were in at around 3pm. He called you again, thankful you answered, and asked if 6pm was a good time, to which you happily accepted.

The three extra hours provided the blond with the much needed time to explore restaurant options and generally nice places to walk around. You probably weren't in this city often, if at all, so wandering like tourists seemed fit.

He eventually settled on a nice sushi restaurant since he hadn't had sushi in awhile. They had plenty of non-sushi options on the off chance you didn't like sushi. Or, you could pick the restaurant, he didn't mind, as long as he got to spend time with you.

Leon was nervous. He had to wipe his hands off a good few times since they'd grown clammy while gripping the steering wheel. He was parked outside the hotel you were staying at, having called you just a couple minutes before to let you know he was outside.

While waiting, the agent decided to get out and lean against the passenger door of his car. He wanted to be a gentleman and open the door for you, though he wasn't really sure people still held the door for others anymore.

His heart skipped a beat when he saw you walk out past the main sliding doors of the hotel, immediately straightening his posture while giving you an awkward smile. You looked absolutely amazing.

"Hey," Leon breathed out, frozen for a moment before suddenly remembering to open the passenger door for you. He just couldn't keep his eyes off of you.

"Hey." You replied back, almost just as winded as he was. "Sorry, I didn't expect the elevator to be so busy. It took a couple rotations before I could even get down here."

You smiled at Leon as a silent thanks, sitting yourself down in his car before he carefully closed the door once you'd settled. After getting into the car himself, he gave you a quick glance and a smile of his own before driving to the restaurant.

Although the conversation between you and Leon was airing on the side of awkward, the two of you slowly loosened up as the night went on. Your apprehension regarding going out with a fan quickly left once you realized how charming the man actually was.

The power dynamic was one of your main worries. You didn't want to feel like you were taking advantage of a man so eager to please, but Leon actually had the same worry, considering his work as a government agent gave him a lot of special privileges that aren't normally handed out to the common person.

Luckily for him, you didn't pry about his work. You gladly accepted his vague description about working for the government and that was that.

You also didn't pry about his interest in you as a musician when the topic came up. That was a given.

After dinner, the two of you wandered around the downtown part of the city for awhile, sightseeing while chatting about anything and everything. You felt oddly safe around Leon, something about him just screamed stability.

Leon felt the same way about you, but the way he described you was fluffy. You made him feel fluffy and warm. And the promise of domesticity and love only made him want you more.

You were so easy to talk to. He rarely ever indulged anyone about his personal life, but he found himself talking about anything he could remember about his childhood on a whim with you.

You were stopped a few times by fans that recognized you. The majority of them had driven up to the city to see your concert.

He knew it was going to happen, but Leon really didn't like how they so carelessly wandered up to you. Did you not look busy to them? Pretty disrespectful, if you asked him.

Leon made sure to make his presence known by placing a gentle hand on your shoulder which pulled you from the brief conversation you'd been so rudely dragged into. If he actually got an opportunity to be with you, the attention you receive will definitely take some getting used to.

A reserved, near isolated man with a popular musician? What a combo that would be.

Eventually, you and Leon ended up back at the hotel you were staying at. The blond didn't want to leave, and it was clear you didn't want him to leave either, but he had work the next day and you were going to be extremely busy the rest of the week. So, as one does, you invited him into your hotel room anyways.

To hell with work, calling out again wouldn't hurt. He was good at feigning illness.

He followed you inside like a puppy, his chest practically pressed against your back the entire way up to your room. You didn't share a room with your bandmates, Leon thanks god for that, so he was able to settle a lot quicker once you led him into the room. You both took your shoes off, leaving them near the door.

As expected, the agent was awkward at first. The two of you just sat on the edge of the bed next to each other and talked for awhile longer.

"I'll admit, it's been a really long time since I've done anything. With anyone." Leon admitted quietly, his hands clasped together in his lap since he didn't quite know what to do with them in the moment.

You laughed nervously in response, almost mimicking his position. "Yeah, it's been a long time for me too. I'm very out of practice.."

He turned his head to look at you with a weak smile tugging at the corner of his lips, eyebrows furrowed upwards. "We don't have to do anything. We can just... hang out for awhile if you want to?"

You contemplated for a moment before responding to him again. "I mean, I'm totally fine with either or..?"

Leon really wanted to fuck you. He's been imagining this moment ever since he first discovered your music. He wished he wasn't so anxious, but he needs to power through that. He needs you.

"Can-" the man cleared his throat before taking in a small breath, voice hushed. "Can I kiss you?"

The second he heard you whisper out a weak "yeah", he quickly angled himself so his body was facing yours, tilting his head to the right as he leaned in and pressed his lips gently against yours.

It only took you a brief moment to bring your arms up to wrap around his neck, his hands moving to grip your waist, rubbing circles against it through your shirt as the kiss deepened.

He loved how vocal you were. You sang beautifully, sure, but he never would've guessed you'd be so sensitive to touch. The little whimpers you made just from being kissed and caressed were already driving him crazy.

Leon moved down to kiss your neck, nipping and sucking hickeys wherever he could. He tucked his fingers underneath your shirt, bunching it up partially before moving away from your neck to pull your shirt off.

He took some time to ogle at your figure, a low growl rumbling from his chest as he shifted himself on top of you, gently pushing you back against the bed to continue his assault on your neck.

Your breathy moans only continued to egg him on. Everything he's ever felt regarding you quickly came bubbling back up, leading him to leave a trail of hickeys down your neck, all along your collarbone, and on the tops of your breasts.

Leon had moved his right hand to grip the point of your hip, the left groping one of your boobs through your bra while keeping himself propped up with his knees on either side of your legs as he sat hunched over you.

The man couldn't keep his hands off of you, his hands dragging up and down your body as they swapped places every few seconds.

"Leon-.. god, please..." You moaned breathlessly, chest heaving. He groaned at the sound of his name leaving your pretty lips, dragging himself back up pull you into a heated kiss.

"My name sounds so good when you moan it." Leon growled against your lips, nipping at your bottom lip which caused you to gasp, allowing him to lick into your mouth. "You taste amazing."

Your hands moved from the sheets to wrap around his neck again, carding your fingers up through the that fluffy golden hair on the nape of his neck. When he pulled away so you both could catch your breath, he wasted no time standing up to shuck off his own shirt.

Leon smirked when you sat up on your elbows, watching your wide eyes rake down his sculpted torso.

"Glad you like what you see." He wiggled his eyebrows at you, causing you to scoff playfully and grab one of the pillows off the bed, tossing it at him. He laughed, catching the pillow to throw right back at you, albeit a little softer than you had. "Hey, hey, alright."

You laughed with him as the pillow landed on your chest, letting it slip off to the side as you sat up fully. You tucked your legs under your ass, sitting back on your haunches as you reached forward to rest your hands against his thighs.

Looking up at Leon with those doe eyes, he just couldn't resist. He knew what you wanted. "Go on, don't be shy.." he spoke in a hushed tone, moving his right hand to rest on your head to play with your hair.

He angled his head down so he could watch you fumble with his belt, wanting to let you set the pace now.

"Thaaat's it, there ya go mama..." Leon whispered with a gravelly voice, eyes half lidded as he watched you finally pull his belt from the loops. Your hands were shaky as they now worked to unbutton and unzip his jeans, glancing up at him occasionally to make sure you were doing everything right.

Once you were able to fully undo the agent's jeans, he moved his hand off your head so he could tug them all the way down for you, kicking them away which left him in only his boxers and socks.

As mentioned before, you were out of practice. You didn't have a very good frame of reference for men, but Leon's sizable erection straining against his boxers was more than intimidating.

The man could tell you were worried. He didn't want to scare you, no, that's the last thing he wanted. So he brought his right hand up to hold the side of your face, caressing your cheekbone his thumb. "Don't feel pressured, sweetheart. Take your time for me."

You looked up at him as you took in a shaky breath, leaning your head against his hand for a moment with a nervous smile. "Thank you... Just-.. just work with me here.." you huffed, moving your gaze back down to his bulge.

You lifted your head away from his hand to which he moved back up to stroke your hair, keeping his gaze fixed down on you.

You tucked your fingers under the waistband of his boxers, glancing up at him one last time, prompting him to smile in approval. You nodded, swallowing dryly as you slowly tugged them down.

His cock sprung out at you and you let out a quiet gasp as it stood directly in front of your face now, tip red and angry. "Oh wow... okay.." you whispered, mostly to yourself as you took in the size of it.

Leon gave a breathy chuckle as he watched you, moving his legs a bit so his boxers would fall the rest of the way down.

You let your hands rest against the tops of his thighs again, a bit closer to his v-line as you looked back up at him. "I like your uh-.. I like your happy trail..."

Your quiet admission dragged another laugh from the man, who was looking right back at you with probably the most endearing expression. "Oh, do you?" You nodded. "I'll make sure to keep it for you then."

The way Leon kept stroking your hair felt so nice, his voice was really encouraging too. You were incredibly thankful he was willing to take things slow and let you lead for the moment.

Speaking of taking the lead, you brought your eyes back down to stare at his cock, watching precum pearl from the slit. You gave yourself one last mental push before bringing your right hand up to wrap around the base, glancing up at Leon when he hissed from the sensitivity.

Your eyes moved from his dick to his face every few seconds as you began slow, languid strokes. Once the blond was able to get past the sensitivity, he was smirking at you again, those encouraging words beginning to slip from his mouth again. "Mmm~... that's gooood... just like that, baby.."

Your confidence in the whole situation was growing with every word of praise Leon directed at you, leading to your hand beginning to move faster. Slick was pooling into panties now, especially with the way he was looking at you with that blissed out expression.

You must've had your own look going since he felt the need to comment on it. "You like that, mama? Like the weight on my cock in your hand?" You only moaned out in response. "Yeah you do. If only you could see the way you look, fuck- I wish I could take a picture. Those pretty eyes lookin' up at me while you stroke it, pouty lil' lips- shit~..."

Leon let you stroke him for awhile longer before patting your head softly, pulling your hand away from him. "C'mon, love. You're a bit overdressed for this, aren't you?"

Damn, you hadn't even realized you still had your bra and pants on. You made quick work of the bra, reaching back to unhook it before letting it fall forward and off your shoulders.

"Ohh~.. There's my gorgeous girl~.." Leon purred, eyeballing your now exposed breasts, cock twitching as he looked over the hickeys that he'd covered the tops of them with. "Those tits of yours look a bit heavy, mind if I hold 'em for ya?"

The agent chuckled as you clicked your tongue at him, and though you didn't want to, you couldn't help but smile at his joke.

He gently pushed you down back onto the bed by your shoulder, letting you move your legs out before he climbed on top of you again. "At least let me love on 'em for a bit?"

The way he said that almost seemed like he was begging, and maybe he was, but regardless you nodded, blush deepening as he brought his head down to your breasts.

He resumed how he was before when he was on top of you, caging you underneath his broad form. Leon teased you, kissing all around the soft mounds before bringing his right hand up to grope one while he attached his lips to the other, licking and sucking your nipple. Your hands flew up to grip at his hair, needing some sort of register.

"O-oh... Leon- ah~! ..Pl-ease be gentle..." As much as he tried to hold back, he couldn't help how desperate he was to taste and feel all of you; your soft cries of pleasure, the way your voice broke when he rolled his tongue around the perked bud, he wanted it all. Soon he was moaning, nearly whimpering, eyes closed while his mouth swapped from one nipple to the other, making sure both got equal treatment.

Leon had shifted his legs up a bit more, almost sitting on your thighs as he sat hunched over you, hands tight on your waist as he centered his focus on using his mouth to toy with your nipples, cock laying right below your belly button as it weeped onto your stomach. He was soaking you in, in love with how responsive you were, in love with you.

Eventually, you tugged his head away from your tender breasts, his mouth wet with his saliva as he looked at you with a dopey smile.

Leon needed more of you. He needed to taste more of you.

Pulling you to the edge of the bed as he stood, Leon quickly yanked off your pants, tossing them to the side. He took a moment to drink in the sight of you; blush running down to your chest, hickeys covering your upper half, nipples swollen, that beautiful body, panties absolutely soaked. He really wanted to take a picture now.

After the agent finished taking in the scenic view in front of him, he slipped down onto his knees, pulling you by your hips so your legs dangled over the edge.

He sighed contently, placing his hands on the inside of your thighs as you attempted to close them. He wasn't really listening at this point, but he could hear you whimper something about 'not staring at it'.

Alright, Leon won't stare. He'll do you one better.

He planted his face right against your clothed pussy, breathing in your heady scent with a low groan, causing his cock to twitch again. "Ohh-ho hooo.. shit baby~.. that's good..."

You gasped, legs trying to close instinctively again which Leon didn't allow. He was so strong, barely straining to keep you spread wide for him as flattened his tongue against the gusset before closing his mouth around it. His nose bumped against your clit over and over as he moved his head up and down, taking in everything you had to offer through your panties.

Your panties started to irritate the man fast, growling as he had to pull himself away from you to tug them off. He dropped them next to where his knees sat on the floor, making a mental note to take those whenever he left your hotel room.

As soon as your panties were off your body, he threw one of your legs over his shoulder, using his right hand to reach up and spread your pussy lips. You whined again about not wanting him to stare which was cut off with a moan as he moved his thumb to press against your clit and rub in small circles.

"If I wanna look at ya, I'm gonna.. and you're gonna let me too..." Leon slurred slightly, eyebrows furrowing as he watched you clench around nothing with a whimper.

"Oh, you like that, huh?" He rumbled, now stroking his index and middle finger through your folds, spreading slick up to your clit so he could keep massaging it. "You like when I get a little bossy with you, pretty girl? Hm?"

You nodded, eyes shut tight as you balled your fists up in the sheets. "Look at me, mama.. Watch me..." Your eyes opened at his words, teary from the stimulation, and he laughed. "There ya go~.. Watch me devour this sweet little cunt of yours."

His words barely had a chance to register in your clouded head before his face was buried back into your crotch, immediately licking along your folds. He slung your other leg over his shoulder before sliding his tongue around your slit, moaning as slick ran into his mouth. You responded with slurred moans of your own, hands flying back to grip at his hair. You muttered out barely legible nonsense, words almost always cut off by moans and whines as Leon sucked on your clit, nipping at it ever so gently.

The agent hadn't experienced this in so long. You sounded so pretty, tasted so good. You were all his now and he had to make sure you knew that too.

"Taste so good. All mine." He growled into your cunt, wrapping his arms under and over your legs so he could place his hands on your hips, holding you steady to keep you from squirming. "This pussy's all mine." He repeated with a chuckle as he continued to lap at your folds, tongue dipping into your hole.

"L-Leon-! I-...I can't-!" You cried out, tugging at his hair as you tried to pull his face away from you. You were close, it was too much.

Oh he needed this. Leon needed you to cum on his face. He brought his still partially slicked up fingers to your pussy, pulling his mouth away for just a moment while he wet them again with a mix of your slick and his saliva.

Immediately, he placed his mouth over your clit, sucking as he pushed one finger into your dripping hole, drawing a breathy gasp from you.

His finger was quickly buried to the knuckle, wiggling it a bit inside of you before starting to pump it in and out of you.

The combination of feeling Leon's thick finger inside of you, curling to hit just the right spot while sucking on your clit had you tumbling over the edge, choking out a moan as tears spilled from your eyes.

It had been so long since you'd done this with anyone, and even then, no one really took the time to focus on you like this.

Your orgasm racked through your body, legs trembling as you gasped, trying to catch your breath. Leon eased you through it, pulling his mouth away so he could look watch his finger slowly disappear into you repeatedly. Once he pulled his finger out, he sucked it clean, leaning down just a bit to drink you up.

"Mm.. good job, sweetheart.." He sighed, taking the chance to stare at your glistening cunt for a bit longer before setting your legs back down on the bed so he could get up off his knees.

The man sat you up as he crawled onto the bed, holding onto your waist as he moved to sit against the headboard, legs out in front of him. He pulled you up onto his lap, making sure you were in a comfortable position.

"That good, mama?" Leon whispered, running his hands down your arms as his eyes trailed down to where your cunt sat right against his cock.

"Yeah... yeah that's good..." You whispered back, angling your head down a bit as you moved your hips experimentally. You did it again when Leon moaned, his hands moving down to your hips so he could grind you down his dick.

The agent harshly huffed through his nose, watching your puffy lips glide across the length of him. "Damn, that's it baby- grind on my fucking cock... god you're so wet."

You let Leon grind you down onto him, weak and drawn out moans being pulled from your lips every time the head of his dick bumped against your swollen clit. He was so focused on you.

"Lift up for me." He ordered, moving one his hands to pat your thigh. You mindlessly did as he told you, lifting yourself up onto your knees so he could line himself up with your hole.

"Gonna fuck ya good.." The blond grumbled, furrowing his eyebrows as he brought his hand back up so both were on your hips again. "Gonna have ya bouncin' on this cock, baby.."

He slowly pushed you down, both of you moaning in tandem when his head pushed past that tight ring of muscle. He gave you a moment to adjust before pushing you further down, mouth agape as your pussy sucked him in.

Once you were fully seated on his dick, you let out a shaky whine, placing your hands on his pecs for balance even though Leon would make sure to keep you upright.

Giving you more time to adjust, he tightened his grip on your hips, feeling your walls clench around him before relaxing a bit. His breathing was ragged, doing everything in his power not to pound into you right then and there.

Instead, he began to grind you on his cock, moving your hips back and forth. You gasped and moaned, nails digging into the taut muscle on his chest. He couldn't help but moan as well, just the sight of him balls deep in your cunt was enough to have him ragged.

"Okay..." You breathed out, causing Leon to hold your hips still. "Okay.. okay I-.. I'm good.." you nodded, looking down briefly where the two of you sat connected before looking up at his face.

Leon didn't need to be told twice, breathing out a groan as he slowly lifted you up. The head was almost pulled out of you before he sat you all the way back down onto his dick. Your lips made an 'o' as you felt him caress the inside of you, breathing still shaky.

After repeating the process a couple more times, he started to pick up the pace, even meeting you with thrusts of his own.

"God- shit baby-.. fuuuck~.." Leon breathed out, eyebrows furrowed as he focused on bouncing you up and down while timing his thrusts. "Bounce on my cock, mama.. Feel it deep in that pussy?"

He spoke breathlessly, eyes moving from your face down to where his dick drilled into you, almost drooling at the erotic sound of skin slapping and your pussy squelching.

"Uh-huh.." You moaned, moving your hands up to his shoulders so you could start to bounce yourself without Leon's help. "S'good.. ohhhh~.."

"Yeeeaahhh, it's good, huh?" Leon smirked, though it faltered a bit as you ground yourself down onto him again before starting to bounce again. "You love it, don't ya?"

You nodded lazily, tears starting to run down your face again while your legs trembled as they grew tired from the workout. The agent took notice of this, taking it upon himself to start bouncing you again since his hands were still firmly planted on your hips.

"Sing for me, sweetheart. Let me hear my superstar sing." Leon's thrusts turned hard as he felt you clench around him, listening to the way your voice rose again as your sensitivity grew. He filled you in all the right places, like you were made for him.

Your second orgasm made you scream, though it wasn't as loud as you thought considering your voice cracked. Your back arched, pussy clenching around Leon's cock like a vice.

He moved his arms up to wrap around your lower back as it arched, muscles flexing as he pulled you against his chest. He fucked you through your orgasm, thrusting up into you like it's the last thing he'll ever do. You were so overstimulated, tears now streaming down your face as choked out moans were forced out of you.

"Want me to cream this sloppy cunt of yours?" He growled into your ear, only getting a loud whine in response. "Words, use your words, c'mon."

"P-please-!" You managed to stutter out as he pounded into you, wrapping your arms around his shoulders so you could bury your face into his neck, tears dripping onto his exposed skin.

"Fuck- finally..." Leon rasped as he thrust into you for a few seconds longer before he held you firmly down on his lap. He came with a low groan, chuckling at your gasp when you felt him throb and pump you full of cum. "Take it, baby, fucking take it all..."

You both sat unmoving for a long minute, catching your breath before sitting up with a whine as your legs screamed at you and his cock shifted inside you.

The agent eased you off with a hum, watching his cum drip out of you and onto his stomach. You sat back once you felt him spread his legs for you, slotting yourself between them.

"Oh you're just perfect, aren't you? Gonna clean me off?" Leon chuckled when you nodded, sighing when you pressed your face against his cock after laying yourself on your stomach.

You licked a lazy stripe up the length of it, eyes closing as you tasted a mix of your juices and his cum. He placed a hand into your hair, gently combing through it as you sucked the head into your mouth with a soft whimper.

Leon watched with hungry eyes as you sucked on his cock, fitting what you could into your mouth before pulling away to lick him

clean, even going so far as to lick the cum off his stomach that had dripped out of you a minute prior.

"Perfect.. So good for me." Leon muttered out bits of praise for you, petting through your hair once you'd finished and just had his dick pressed against your cheek while you stroked it with your right hand. "My perfect superstar."

You smiled weakly, sitting up and crawling to the side so he could lay down, pulling your back flush against his chest the second you laid down.

The both of you were up early the next morning showering, Leon helping you clean by holding you against the shower wall so he could eat you out.

You had to go in to help your bandmates and crew set up the next stage you'd be performing at, so you gave Leon a tender kiss goodbye, reminding him to call you.

Oh he'll be calling you, right after he calls his boss. He forgot to call out and he already had a couple missed calls from them.

[dreamerschroniclesofstories]

Crawl home to her

A/N: thank you so much for your love on my previous work  “ Goodbye, Tommy Shelby”, i appreciate it so much, i will officially be starting the sequel next week. i'm currently very busy with end of term uni assignments. For this fic you are about to read, i would recommend listening to work song by hozier.

I DON'T GIVE PERMISSION FOR YOU TO REPOST THIS ON ANY OTHER SITE AND TO TRANSLATE THIS.

Summery: who would of thought a conversation with Polly, after another war riddled nightmare, could cause tommys love to come back to him.

Word count: 1,748

The dark. Tommy's worst enemy since the war. It isn't the dark that scares him, its the noises of the consistent banging of shovels and the pained yells of men coming from his walls that taunt him every time he closes his eyes. Usually, the opium he keeps hidden in his draw stops the noises for a few hours.

But not tonight.

Tommy gasps as he opens his eyes and sits up, the room spinning as he slowly sits on the edge of his bed, putting his hands on his head, trying to calm down, his heart races inhumanly fast, he swears one day his heart would burst through his chest.

Like every other night, Tommy stands up, grabs a cigarette from his pouch on his bedside table and leaves him room. the floorboards creak as he walks past the other bedrooms that hold his two brothers, Arthur and Finn, and the bedroom that holds his aunt Polly. The old wooden floor has been shaped over time by each sole of the Shelby family, from generations of living in the house.

Tommy walks into the kitchen and stops in his tracks when he sees Polly sat at the table, he raises an eyebrow as he takes the cigarette from between his lips, continuing to walk to the small table that holds the whiskey. He pours himself a glass.

" why are you up poll?" he asks confused, then gulps down the whiskey from the glass.

" much like you Thomas , nightmares" she whispers, holding her mug of tea in both hands, making sure the warm steam hits her face so it could protect her from the coldness of the night.

" i don't know what you're on about pol" he grumbles, pouring himself another glass of whiskey, then he walks over to the table and sits down across from Polly.

Polly raises an eyebrow, watching Tommy as she sips her tea. Polly knew Tommy was lying, since he was child she could sense when he wasn't telling the truth. He knew this, that's why Tommy chuckles quietly.

" and you pol?" he asks knowingly, wanting to change the subject, leaning back in his seat then takes a drag of his cigarette, seconds later blowing out the smoke.

The small kitchen area was filling up with smoke. Polly delicately places her mug down onto the table, grabbing a cigarette from her own pouch.

"i have the sight Thomas, i have nightmare almost every night" Polly explains, then lights the cigarette before taking her first drag "your's is about the war" she determined.

" it's not serious Polly, every man that came back from France. mentally never leaves" tommy whispers.

polly smirks " yes but most of those men have someone at home to help them, you did but you pushed her away" she points out.

Tommy immediately tenses up, he has not spoken to or about her since before the war. By her, he means his childhood best friend, Alice. They had met during school when Alice was left out on the first day of school and Tommy noticed and went over to Alice to talk to her. Since then, if you saw one you knew the other would be close by.

However, a week before the war. Alice and Tommy had an argument after Alice found out Tommy enlisted. They did not talk it out in time before Tommy left. When Tommy came back, he was a changed man, he did not want Alice involved in the life he had become involved with.

" don't pol" Tommy warns.

" she's a seamstress now Tommy, has her own little shop on the other side of town, sometimes i see her at the markets" she shared.

When Tommy and Alice were teens, Alice always talked about making dress's when she left school. However, she was always self-conscious about the dresses she made and use to show them to Tommy. He was her number one fan, he use to encourage her to sell them, Tommy was the only person who believed in herself.

Tommy smiles slightly " she does?" his eyes sparkle slightly, causing Polly to chuckle.

Polly nods " she lives two streets behind her, next door to Mrs. dingle, the baker"Polly explains.

Tommy stands up and grabs his coat, not saying a word to Polly as he leaves.

Alice's flat

A sleepless night, in Alice's mind, was a chance to mediate about the previous day and the day that was coming. Mediation helps Alice to feel the energy of the world sparkling at her finger tips. The energy asks her to let them in and help her dreams become a nighttime reality.

It was one of them nights for Alice, she sat on her one person couch by her window, watching as the stars twinkle down onto small health, making natural guide lights for the men going home from a late nigh at work. Alice found the night sky beautiful, she finds that the stars look like snowflakes in the night, yet they are forever still. Alice found it amazing that for centuries and millenia's, everyone had seen the same constellations.

Alice stood up, going to her kitchen to pour herself another cup of tea, the sound of a knock on her door makes her flinch. It is two in the morning, who would be knocking on her door.

Alice picks up her gun from her kitchen draw and walks to the front door, even though she doesn't speak to Tommy anymore, she knew she needed protection encase someone who knows they were friends comes after.

She takes the safety off her gun and begins to open the door, as the door inches open her heart feels like it was about to burst from anxiety.

Alice frowns when she sees a man standing in front of her door with his head tilting down, his peaked cap covering his eyes but she knew who it was immediately.

"Tommy?"she whispers, her voice soft but also shaky. They had seen each other this close since before the war.

Tommy lifts his head, making eye contact with Alice, His eyes are the same. They were the colour of every dancing sky, filled with infinite hues of that are illuminated by newborn light.

He coughs slightly " can i come in?" his voice vibrating through her bones, causing a much welcomed and missed vibration.

Alice nods and moves to the side, allowing Tommy to walk into her small but homely flat. He takes off her cap, Alice closes the door then walks back over to her kitchen.

"Would you like a drink?" Alice asks, looking over at Tommy, who was taking his coat off.

"whiskey?" he asks, sitting at her small dinning table.

Alice smiles and nods, she takes the bottle of Irish whiskey from the back of her cupboard, then takes the whiskey cup from the cupboard as well before walking over to Tommy.

"are you in trouble?" she questions, placing the glass in-front of Tommy then pours the whiskey slowly.

Tommy frowns " i'm not, why would you think that?" he asks confused.

" you are Thomas Shelby, you have a lot of enemies and we have not spoken for nearly five years Tommy, so why are you here?" she points out, sitting down across from him.

" i heard you are a seamstress" he states, taking out a cigarette from his pouch, lighting it. All the whilst, not breaking eye contact with Alice.

She chuckles " you came here at nearly three in the morning to talk about my job?" Alice raises an eyebrow.

Tommy smirks slightly " There's only so much a man can take of his four walls" he admits.

Alice hums " having nightmares? I've heard a lot of men that came back from France have them, some so bad they go to the hospital" she whispers, her eyes now full of worry.

" i'm Thomas Shelby, you don't have to worry about me" he jokes.

Alice rolls her eyes and stands up, walking around the table, pulling out the chair beside Tommy and sits down, grabbing his hands gently " you were my best friend Tommy, of course i'm going to worry about you. Don't give me the Shelby bullshit" she affirmed.

Tommy smiles for the first time since he came back from France "glad to see you have changed"

Alice smiles softly " i'd never changed Tommy, i'll forever be me, for you" she admits.

Both of them did not say a word to each-other after that, the tension was thick between them. Tommy gently lifts his hand, stroking his thumb down Alice's cheekbone down to her lips, her pale skin was like the silk of the petals of white roses in the summer. Tommy glances down at her lips, his thumb gliding over her plump bottom lip. Alice inhaled softly at the touch, her lips were as good as her eyes. Painting a picture of her emotions.

"i love you" Alice blurts out.

In the stillness of the moment that follows her confession, there so much both of them can say. Alice doesn't regret what she say, sudden moments are a risk but sometimes they are necessary to get what you want. So instead of tommy replying, he gently puts his hand on her cheek and pulls her in. Kissing her.

Kissing her softly but with passionate purpose. Kissing her, immediately stopped the sound of shovels and the sound of mens screams.

Theres a muffled sound of shock from Alice before she softens into the kiss. Her delicate hand finding her place on the back of tommys neck , her lips move against his, as if she was whispering a question over and over again for him. He pulls back slowly, thinking she would want him too.However, Alice follows him, chasing after his lips. Her glazed eyes opening.

in that kiss, was the sweetness of their passion, a million loving thoughts condensed into one moment.

Alice smiles happily, looking between tommys eyes, her eyes full of love. If any one moment in Alice's life were to ancher her soul , creating a tie to this reality. it would be the moment she fell in love with him. She realised that she had a protector born for pure love and how could she not love that? How could she not love all of Thomas Shelby. He is the rope and the knot to her vessel that is now in safe mooring. For this, she will forever be his.

Alice strokes tommys cheek softly " you've come home to me"

A/N: EEEK! i am so proud of this one. Please leave a like, comment and/or re-blog. It is all appreciated xx

[captainwans]

LAST TRAIN TO LONDON.

pairing: professor!alex turner x student!fem!oc

word count: 6.5k words

━━ 𝐏𝐀𝐑𝐓 𝐎𝐍𝐄. | 𝑻𝑯𝑬 𝑳𝑶𝑵𝑮𝑰𝑵𝑮.

summary: nina collett is many things. she’s a devoted mother, a loyal friend, a daughter, and a dedicated student. each aspect of her life has challenges and its sacrifices and she is forced to confront these, demanding her constant attention. amidst the whirlwind of responsibilities and emotions, she finds her professor becoming more involved in her life than she expected, adding another layer of turbulence to her already chaotic life. balancing the fine line between professional boundaries and personal feelings was more difficult than she anticipated, all while she was trying to keep her life from unraveling.

warning: this series contains mature scenes, sexual references, character death, vulgar language, mentions of drug and alcohol abuse, mental illness, age gap (student in her twenties), an excruciating slow-burn (now i’m being dramatic, but you get the picture), other triggering topics, and all the feels (—i’m talking about sweet-teeth rotting fluff that makes you want to evaporate. or soul wrenching angst that feels like a punch in the gut). if any of themes, opinions or content upsets you or makes you uncomfortable, feel free to message me, or simply, do not read it.

𝓝ina fiddled with her lighter, soft curses emitting from her lips when it didn’t ignite. She cupped her cigarette with one hand, and the corner of her eyes crinkled as she tried to assault her lighter to catch any sparks of fire. After a few tries, a small but weak fire ignited, and she didn’t hesitate to place the cigarette close to the lighter. She placed the stick to her lips, cheeks hollowed before puffing out the smoke. She let out a content sigh, the cigarette resting between her fingers as she let her back hit the platform. 

Nina stared through space, her mind working overtime as she waited for her last train home. Exhaustion engulfed her body like a blanket and she had to close her eyes for a second, her lips turning into a tired sneer as a yawn escaped from her mouth. She had spent the weekend with her closest friends and family, celebrating her best friend for who had just become a new mother. Her lips curled into a smile, the idea of Breana being a mother sent a fluttering warmness into her chest. But that warmness soon manifested into a heavy feeling, more toward herself at her role of being a mother—which she knew Breana would do a hell of a lot job better than her. 

It wasn’t that she was a bad mother—-no, far from it. Her daughter means the world to her and she loves her one-year-old with every fiber of her being. Mathilda was the center of her universe. Every decision, every choice, and every sacrifice had been made for her and it would continue to be so. Yet, as she was watching Breana’s newborn cuddled in his father’s arms, a prickling pain stirred inside her chest. It was a painful reminder that she could never give Mathilda the chance to meet her father.

The tragic fate of her fiancé, Josh, along with carrying a child left a scar deeper than she imagined. Guilt and shame stirred within her, filling every crevice of her brain and shaking her to the core. She often found herself replaying the moment she learned of his death, each replay worsening her misery. It was a memory filled by the harsh words of her mother-in-law, who had called her stupid and an embarrassment. Josh had died in a car accident during a heavy storm, an accident Nina blamed on herself because she had asked him to run some errands that day. It’s your fault. He is dead because of you. Her voice echoed inside her mind, leaching her sense of self. Suddenly, the idea of being a mother with dreams and ambitions felt too far out of reach. It didn’t seem so appealing anymore. She felt hollow, overwhelmed, and scared by the thought of raising a child on her own and finishing her studies seemed like an impossible task.

In the midst of the storm, Nina refused to give up. She kept thinking of Josh and she knew he would never want this for her. Being shunned by her in-laws gave her the chance to focus on what truly mattered—her own family. She didn’t have the best relationship with her parents growing up, but when Mathilda was born, everything changed. Suddenly, there were daily calls, frequent visits, and a lot more affection than she was used to. It felt strange at first, but she slowly got used to it, realizing that she wouldn’t trade it for anything. This was her chance to heal old wounds and finally make things right. 

Mathilda was her own little sunshine—a bright and joyful child who filled the house with laughter, giggles, and warmth. It was something Nina hadn’t known that she needed so much. By looking into those big, innocent eyes, she knew she was going to be okay and that Josh would always be with her, living through Mathilda. Being a mother was the hardest task in her life, but it was also the best task she could ever ask for.

“This is the last train to London. No other trains are leaving for London today.” A male announcer’s monotonic tone pulled her out of her melancholy, making her sigh before throwing her lifeless cigarette on the ground. She stomped on the stick with her heel, hands tightening her bag that was securely wrapped around her shoulder. She stood in line among many others, eyes darting around her. Her hazel eyes found a child, whose doe-eyes were boring into hers as she sat on her mother’s shoulders. 

Nina felt her heart swell, the way the child’s eyes glowered from the lights above, reminding her of her sweet baby girl who was waiting for her to come home. The little girl on her mother’s shoulder brought her little hands up to wave, which she gladly did the same as her lips curved into a sweet smile. She watched a big toothy grin etch onto the baby’s face, lips emitting small giggles. The mother looked up, moving her gaze to where her daughter was looking at. The woman politely smiled toward the female, her head nodding in greeting as she gripped her child’s hands. “She’s pretty, isn’t she, bub?” 

Nina’s heart fluttered, eyes softening at the little girl shyly nodding her head. She hummed, smiling at the woman. She turned her head back to her daughter, a wide smile reaching her features. “And aren’t you the cutest thing ever?” she cooed, fingers tickling her side earning a happy beam. Some turned their heads to the interaction, smiles forming their tired faces, and others who stood in line impatiently and just wanted to hop on the train.

Nina stepped onto the train, her heels loudly clanking against the hard metal ground causing a few heads to turn her way. She felt heat wash over her, blood rushing through her ears at the unwanted attention as she squeezed herself into the cramped space of passengers trying to blend in. Her lips pressed into a thin line, eyebrows furrowed with discomfort as she swarmed into the heavy mass of bodies occupying the exit area. 

She bit her lip, stifling back a groan, feeling someone’s heel stepping on her toes. She clenched her jaw, her narrowed eyes darting across the packed ambiance as she looked for empty seats or even a place to stand. Much to her dismay, it was none as it was inhabited by many other frustrated passengers. She fixed the strap of her bag and clutched it tightly against her body, eyes still searching. But as she was looking her eyes locked with none other than her professor, whose eyes were hesitant, but soft as he gave her a polite smile in greeting.

Her heart leaped out of her chest, feeling a dust of crimson dancing across her cheeks. She rubbed the back of her neck awkwardly, returning his smile with an uncertain simper, mostly to herself as she was contemplating whether or not he was smiling at her or someone else. “Excuse me, ma’am.” 

A rough voice startled her out of her state, head snapping toward a man who was standing beside her, looking rather impatient. She sheepishly apologized, realizing where she was standing, and moved to the side. She blew her cheek out with a heavy breath as her feet led her toward the other side of the train, hand gripping the metal pole tightly.

Her mind started wandering back to him, who was standing a few feet away from her. She could only see his face as his figure was covered by commuters standing in the middle of the train. She wondered what he was wearing since she was used to his formal attire—suit pants, black striped shirt, sometimes a plain white shirt and if you took a closer look you could see a small silver chain wrapped delicately around his neck. A warm feeling settled into her stomach and she cringed for feeling this way about her own professor. It wasn’t like she was in love with him like any other student was, but she couldn’t help but immerse in the idea of seeing him under different circumstances.  

There wasn't that much of an age gap between them and by the looks of it, he looked fairly young compared to other professors and employees in the university. The subject of age seemed to be the most appealing amongst the students, especially for the female students who gave him heart eyes whenever he entered the lecture room. Most of his lectures included cheeky and flirty remarks from the girls in the front row, desperate to grasp his attention. Nina was quite the opposite, well—Mr. Turner was definitely appealing to her eyes, but due to her shame and bashful nature, she prefers to keep her fantasies and opinions to herself. She has for certain thought about him rearranging her insides in the classroom once or twice, but you didn’t hear that from her. 

Besides her infatuation, she finds him incredibly intelligent and a good lecturer. Mr. Turner is quite the talker, which is not surprising with the way the girls are piling up his feet, but that part seems to be irrelevant to him. And she liked that about him—he’s only here to do his job, nothing more. She usually sits in the front row, but distances herself from the annoyingly loud girls who wanted nothing more than to sleep with him. 

     “Mr. Turner, what are your plans this weekend?” A student interrupted the professor mid-sentence, earning his attention as his eyes averted away from the projector, toward the young female who leaned closer against the table with a flirtatious smile. 

     The lecturer held his breath, lips pressed into a thin line as he narrowed his eyes at her. “Nothing that concerns you,” he replied with a tip-lipped smile, brushing off her flirtatious nature as he placed his hands on his hips before clearing his throat. “As I was saying….” he continued with his lecture, ignoring the hushed whispers coming from the girls in the front row. 

     This went back and forth and Nina fought the urge to roll her eyes at one of them as she scribbled down a few words in her notebook. She bit her lip in concentration, eyebrows creasing her forehead whilst trying to pay attention to what he was saying among the loud whispers that were filling every crevice of her brain. She tsked, face morphing into a scowl as she shared a look with her friend, who was sitting beside her just as annoyed.

     Her irritation, along with the rest of the class, seemed to catch his attention, the character in her eyes mirroring his as he noticed her look of discomfort. He paused, causing the room to be quiet too. The hushed whispers and murmurs seemed to cease, everyone holding their breath in anticipation. 

     Mr. Turner stepped closer to his audience, eyes darting across the room as he studied the state of his students. He licked his lips before speaking, hand gripping his projector controller. “Raise your hand if you’re deeply disturbed by the people from the front seat.” he simply told his students with his hand raised, voice calm and stoic. 

     Nina wanted to laugh at how the girls’ expressions changed, looking behind them to see that everyone raised their hand in the air, including her as they voiced their shared complaints. She quietly snickered, covering a hand over her mouth, earning his attention. She saw a glint in his eyes before he moved his head toward his class. “If you’re here for the sake of learning, you’re seated. If there are other reasons, you may leave,” he ordered, sauntering backward.

     His arm was stretched, the controller in his hand marking a red dot pointed toward the door. “The door is right behind me,” he said once again, a small smile reaching his face as he watched the spectacle in front of him. The seats were rearranged as half of the class started leaving, making some students who were seated cheer in delight, making her stifle back a grin. 

     She slumped back into her seat, deeply exhaling as she mumbled incoherent things under her breath. “Thank God,” she sighed, earning a response from her friend. She fixed her posture, hands running over her notes to see where she left off. 

     She watched Mr. Turner’s lips curve upwards, watching them leave the lecture room before moving his head back to his remaining students. She watched his eyes trailing over the front row, and she almost jumped when he locked eyes with her. He gave her a smile and she didn’t know if she was delusional, but she swore she saw him winking at her.

A harsh collision between her and another passenger brought her out of her daydream, feeling their body trapping her against the window. She let out a raspy gasp, the burning ache on her side clawing its way to her throat. She quietly hissed, face forming into a scorn as she brought a hand to her right side. “Fuck,” she murmured, rubbing the area which she knew was going to be a nasty bruise.

Nina’s ears burned with their profuse apologies, and she had to swallow back a shady remark that would probably kick her out of the train. She gritted her teeth in pain, jaw so tightly clutched that she could only nod her head, sending a sharp smile their way before moving her gaze forward. Much to her luck, her eyes found his once again—this time clouding with genuine concern. 

Blood rushed through her face, feeling herself getting hot as her thoughts spiraled out of control. The thought of him watching her getting slammed into the window was enough for her to cringe internally. She looked away for a second, and looked back at him before glancing beside her, unsure eyes looking for another suitable person that he sent his concerns to. She cursed inside her mind, clenching her jaw before looking back at him with a finger pointed at herself. 

Mr. Turner’s lips curved upwards, eyes tinted with amusement as he nodded his head. He watched her mouth turn into an “o”, realization forming her features as she gave him a polite yet bashful smile before nodding. He saw her quickly moving her head, eyes looking elsewhere while being squeezed between two passengers. He felt her discomfort and he wanted to reach out to her and have him close to his side, but he knew that was too far out of his reach. 

The professor’s mind was a hurricane. It was violently raging, swirling, and spinning that it was hard to tell where it was all leading. He looked away, gaze moving away from her toward the hard ground with a puzzled expression. A heavy feeling tugged at his chest. It was like something or someone was sitting on his ribs, crushing till he couldn’t breathe. His eyebrows creased his forehead and he brought his hand up to his chest, clutching his shirt into a fist as if he was trying to remove the shame that was latched into his heart. 

Alex knew it was wrong—very wrong. He had overstepped his boundaries, and he was fighting for his life to keep it professional. He exhaled with a heavy breath, chest heaving as he tried to shake the image of her from his mind. But it was no use; from the moment he saw her in his first lecture, he knew he was doomed. Those hazel eyes, so intently focused on him, seemed to see right through him. The way she listened so intently, with genuine interest and engagement, made him feel a magnetic pull he couldn’t resist. It was as if her presence alone made him feel seen and valued.

Nina was top of his class, exceeding in every topic psychology had to offer. Her grasp of the subject was remarkable and her passion left him sometimes dumbfounded with her captivating insights and perspectives. She definitely left a profound impression on everyone around her—including him. Although she was reserved and quiet during most of his lectures, she had other ways to stand out as the shining star of his class. She was often seated at the front, nose buried in her notebook as she was scribbling down every word that came out of his mouth. She had ‘I’m smart and intelligent’ tattooed on her forehead, and he wasn’t all surprised when some of her classmates desperately volunteered to be in the same discussion group as her. He didn’t want to be the professor who had favorite students, but she was an exception.

     Nina walked forward with a stoic expression, eyes looking anywhere as she got lost in her inner world as she was on her way to her next lecture. She had her books close to her chest, arms crossed like two swords along with her tote bag tightly strapped to her shoulder. Her Chelsea boots skimmed smoothly down the marble floor, fastening their pace as she noticed the hallway slowly turning into traffic. 

     She grimaced, looking at the many students engulfed around the ambiance, just like her, trying to get to their class. Her stomach turned into knots, thoughts wandering over to her professor’s nagging and whining over her lateness. Her professor was a woman in her late 40s, mostly very sweet, but she was very picky and strict over time and punctuality. She could already hear her voice at the back of her head, and she was so immersed in the thought of Mrs. Williams that she didn’t notice someone walk her way. 

     Before her brain could register the sound of her books dropping, along with her glasses, her body collided with a hard chest. She lost balance and fell backward, her body dropping down the hard marble floor with a thud. Her lips emitted a small whimper, eyes squinting as her hands looked for her glasses amidst a busy crowd filled with students. “Shit,” she mumbled, a cloud entering her vision and she felt a burning ache on her right wrist.

     “I am terribly sorry. Here let me help,” she heard a deep–yet soft voice fill inside her eardrums, causing her to look up. She scorned, blinking a few times as she looked in front of her with her blurry vision. Her hand took hold of her glasses and she put them on, seeing the world clearly. 

     She noticed that her book was no longer on the floor and she instinctively looked up, gazing up to see Alex’s apologetic expression while he held his hand for her to help her on her feet. Crimson danced across her cheeks, along with a furiously beating heart as she slowly took his hand. 

     Nina gently brushed him off, voice soft as he hoisted her up to her feet. “N-No, please. I was in my own bubble and didn’t notice you walking towards me.” she sheepishly apologized with a shy smile as she felt him squeeze her hand before letting go, and she hated that he let go. 

     Alex chuckled, “I guess we’re both a little out of it today, huh?” he jested as the pair moved to the side, sauntering away from the busy crowd toward the end of the stairs. Nina held onto the stair rail, eyes looking at the people passing through the big hall. She locked eyes with her friend, standing beside the vending machine, who was looking at her with a knowing look. She gave her a glare at her giving her thumbs up, feeling heat creep upon her face before she moved her attention elsewhere. 

     “Your hand?” His voice pulled her attention toward him, watching his frown deepen as he watched her bruised wrist from the fall. She watched him hesitate for a second, fingers rubbing together before grabbing the hold of her wrist. The warmth from her face made it ten times worse, feeling the blood rush through her ears as she listened to her beating heart. 

     Guilt prickled his chest, lips screwed up as he gently rubbed the bruise. “I’m sorry,” he mumbled in a faint apology, rough fingers moving in a circle pattern as if the bruise would go away. He bit his lower lip, fingers halting his gesture before he finally let go of her hand. He looked at her, a small smile reaching his face as he felt a war inside his mind. He cursed inside his head, feeling like he crossed a line between being professional and overstepping boundaries.  

     Nina didn’t seem to mind. She watched him, heart stuttering against her chest at his touch. Her jaw slacked, and she saw him moving his head, eyes looking at her. She realized that she hadn’t said anything and she blinked before clearing her throat, bashfully smiling. “Oh, it’s fine, really.” she brushed him off, ignoring the throbbing pain on her wrist. She let out a small chuckle. “It’s not the first time I’ve hurt myself going down this hallway. The amount of times I’ve tripped and fallen is pretty concerning.” she tried to lighten up, ceasing some of the guilt that was reaching his eyes. 

     Alex’s chest rumbled with a deep chuckle, lips curving upwards at her simper. He let his body lean against the stair rail, gaze averting away from her toward the busy hall. “Yeah, tell me about it. It’s like watching the Hunger Games or something. I don’t get why they’re all in a rush, though.” he said, lips pressed into a thin line. 

     Nina bit her lip, eyes darting across his handsome features. She looked back at the hall, shrugging with a grin, eyes tinted with playfulness. “Could be a race against who would get to your class first. You see those girls?” she said, pointing a finger at them. “Yeah, definitely in a hurry to sit in the front seat.” she joked, lips emitting a small giggle before turning her head to him.

    Alex grimaced, shaking his head with a laugh. “Oh, god no.” he let out a breathy chuckle, licking his lips. His eyes sparked. “They’re definitely running to Miles’ class. Heard they dropped out of psychology and are taking music studies instead,” he told her, scoffing at the end making her mouth gape open. 

     “What? Really?” She expressed, eyes wide almost building out its sockets as she watched him nodding his head. His eyes danced at her reaction, sending an amused smile her way. “Mhm. Think Miles can handle it, though. He loves the attention.” he said with another chuckle, referring to his colleague and close friend.

     Nina’s eyes lit up at the mention of the music professor. She remembered that he was a substitute for Alex one time and she grew very fond of him during that lecture. Miles Kane was very jovial and full of energy, which seemed to match her class, as they developed a liking to him. While he had no such expertise with Mr. Turner’s subjects, Miles sure had an interesting way of presenting given topics with his competence—being music. 

     She thought about Mrs. Williams’ class and she knew she was already running late, but she couldn’t seem to find the energy to care as she was glued beside her favorite professor indulging in a conversation—which was the longest conversation she’d ever had with him, ever.

     “See you in class at three?” Alex asked with a gentle smile, hope tinted in his voice as he changed the subject.

     He watched her face morph into a small frown as she shook her head. “Sorry. I have a dentist appointment.” He nodded in understanding, his face clouding with slight disappointment at her absence from today’s lecture, but that look quickly vanished as it rapidly appeared. This went unnoticed by the latter and he watched her eyes lit up.

     “Oh, by the way. I couldn’t send the last assignment because my computer is not working at the moment, but I did print it and–uh, wait…I think I got it. I’ll give it to you. Hold on.” she bubbled, words mumbling incoherent words as she roamed her hands around her bag to look for her papers. 

     The professor’s deep chuckle filled her ears, causing a tremor of butterflies to swarm into her stomach. She felt his hand rest on her arm, making her look up. She hated that she was so easily susceptible to him. She felt hot under his touch. She watched him shake his head, slowly pulling his hand away making her frown. “Don’t even worry about it.” 

     Her heart stuttered against her chest, making her let out a breath she didn’t know she was holding. She pouted, “Are you sure, Mr. Turner?” she asked him, doe-eyes looking into his soft caramel orbs that she shamefully had grown to love. 

     He nodded, giving her a reassuring smile. “Don’t sweat it. and besides…You’re my A student, and I know that with this assignment it will be just as strong as the others. Your writing is…. incredibly remarking, I must say. I really admire your passion for this subject.” he gushes, lips curving upwards at her response. 

     Nina’s features went from a bashful expression to an appreciative look. Her lips morphed into a smile, showing her teeth as the rapid of her chest stuttered. His words kept repeating inside her head like a mantra and she covered her fingers on her mouth to hide a big grin. She bit her lip, eyes sparking. “T-Thank you, Mr. Turner.” she shyly accepted his compliment, eyes softening at the way he was looking at her with another polite simper. 

     The professor hummed with a tip-lipped smile, mouth closing as the pair fell into silence. Alex’s eyes danced, mirroring the way his stomach swooned with butterflies. He felt a tug at his heartstrings, chest prickling for developing such feelings for his student. As much as he tried to resist, he couldn’t help but let his eyes linger longer on her face. It traced down every feature, every line, and then back to her hazel eyes before trailing down to her lips. 

     “Mr. Turner?” he slightly jumped, her honey-filled voice pulling him back to reality. He blinked, noticing her looking at him with a look he couldn't quite decipher, with her head tilted to the side. Blood rushed through his face, a flustered expression forming his handsome features as he realized that he had been mindlessly staring at her without knowing. He let out a breathy chuckle, heart palpitating against his chest as his lips emitted small apologies. 

     She hummed with a small giggle, shaking her head at him. “It’s quite alright,” she reassured, eyes soft as she watched him let out another chuckle. 

     Alex sighed, loudly cursing inside his head and he looked down at his hands realizing that he was still holding her books. His eyes widened, his brain registering that she was probably headed to her class. “Right…uh–your books. I am so sorry. Here. I’ll see you next week then.” Alex stuttered, handing over her books before clearing his throat and turning on his heel. He grimaced, cursing internally while having his back to her as he fastened his pace. 

     Way to go, Alex. He thought.

Alex snapped out of his state, his tired eyes moving from the filthy ground toward her, again. He quickly looked away as a small curse emitted from his lips, feeling like a predator watching his prey. He ran a hand over his hair, his hand carding through his locks, his nails lightly scraping at his scalp. He closed his eyes, a long sigh escaping from his lips, and letting his back hit the wall. Stop looking at her, you fucking creep. He thought to himself, jaw clenched so hard that it would break at any second. 

Should I ask her to stand beside me, or is that weird? He thought, his handsome features morphing into a grimace. He bit his lower lip, hand tightening around the grip handle as he was battling internal turmoil. But she looks uncomfortable, though. Should I do it–no, fuck. It makes you look weird—His train of thought was abruptly interrupted by an awkward cough coming from behind him. “Excuse me.”

Alex shifted his body to the side while his hand was holding the grip handle to prevent him from falling. He looked at them, eyes apologetic as he let them through. He felt heat flood over his face, realizing that he had taken up the entire space. He was so immersed in his own world that he forgot everything else around him. 

A small giggle earned his attention, head whirled toward the sound coming next to him. His gaze softened, watching a little girl nestled into her mother’s arms. The child had her eyes on him, doe-eyes curiously staring at him with a happy beam. His lips curled up, bringing his hand out to wave. Her reaction was laughable, making Alex chuckle as he watched her shyly hide her face in her mother’s chest. 

He moved his gaze away, eyes staring through empty space. He felt eyes on him, making him clench his jaw. He knew it was her and he felt her boring her eyes into the side of his head. It felt like he was going to have holes in his temple and he was contemplating his next actions. When he couldn’t handle it anymore, he finally looked over at her, still in the same uncomfortable position with commuters wedged between her. 

Alex felt his heart skip a beat as he watched her sending him a small smile. He returned her smile, eyes growing tender. ‘Are you okay?’ he mouthed, referring to her current state. His stomach turned into knots, watching her huddled into a corner, trapped into the cramped space. He saw her nod her head, shoulders shrugging as she gave him a tired look. Fuck it, I’m doing it. he thought.

The never ending battle inside his head ceased and he didn’t know where the sudden confidence came from. The professor gestured with his head to the space next to him, indicating for her to stand. He saw her face etch into a confused look, tilting her head to the side. He gave her a look, eyes tinted with slight amusement and he gestured with his hand, pointing next to him. 

Realization dawned on her face. A flustered expression formed her delicate features, lips curled up as she mirrored his simper with a shy nod. She looked beside her, noticing a passenger asleep on her shoulder. She blew out a small breath, face gracing with a scorn as she carefully moved her shoulder. She shifted her body to the side, making the person’s head hit the window. She stifled back a laugh, chewing on her bottom lip as she was trying to squeeze through the crowded space. 

Nina deeply exhaled, not realizing she was holding her breath. Her eyes found him as she was walking toward him, whose face was painted with amusement at her situation. Her lips curved up, a dust of pink dancing across her cheeks as she held her bag close to her body. Her other hand was gripping on the rubber handle to keep her from falling, but the train lurched causing her to stumble on her feet. She gripped on the handle with both hands, feeling the train sped along the tracks, swaying side to side that made it difficult to walk. 

“Fucking hell,” she muttered under her breath, the train’s erratic jerks nearly throwing her off her balance. She managed to carefully make her way toward him, but just as she neared her professor, she tripped over her own feet. Her lips uttered a small squeak just as he caught her in time, steadying her with a firm grip before she could fall. “Woah there—-I’ve got you.” his deep voice filled inside her eardrums, feeling his arm around her waist.

Nina felt a flush of embarrassment creeping up her neck, eyes looking anywhere but him. She let his touch soak into her skin, his warmth sending electricity through her. She turned to face him, suddenly aware of how close they were standing. She watched him smiling softly down at her, “Well, that would’ve been one way to make an entrance.” she heard him say, making her lips twitch upwards. 

Nina hummed with a small chuckle, eyes sparking. “I guess I’ve got a future in stunt work if my psychology degree doesn’t pan out.” she jested, wiggling her eyebrows making her professor laugh. She joined him, but their laughter seemed to abruptly cease, noticing some people on the train giving them disapproving looks. 

The pair looked back at each other, stifling back another laugh. Alex looked at the old couple glaring daggers at them, his lips curving upwards. “Someone skipped their coffee this morning.” he said in a small voice, his voice barely above a whisper, but she heard him nonetheless. 

Nina nodded her head, a simper resting on her lips. "You’re right. They look like they could use a strong cup right now.” she whispered, eyes averting away from the couple toward him, her grin widening as they both dissolved in quiet laughter.

The Collett girl tried her best to stomp down the butterflies that swarmed into her stomach, the sound of his laughter sending her almost reeling. She felt a flush of rose spread across her cheeks, along with a furiously beating heart that she was so sure of him hearing. Nina was taken off guard how they effortlessly fell into a conversation, their words flowing as freely as the train moved along the tracks. 

She couldn’t grasp where she got her sudden confidence from, her shyness melting away as they talked about anything and everything that came to mind. He told her about his passion for music, revealing a side of him she hadn’t expected. She shared snippets of her life, but hesitating to mention her daughter waiting for her at home. She felt it wasn’t the time nor the place to reveal such information, yet.  

The conversation flowed, creating a pleasant rhythm between them. Yet, as the conversation eventually began to fade, a comfortable silence engulfed around them. They exchanged occasional glances from time to time, gentle smiles and soft looks toward each other. The train rumbled along, the clatter of tracks being the only sound that was heard over the cramped ambiance. It was quiet on the train. There were a few murmurs and hushed whispers from a few passengers, while the rest were either seated or standing with tired expressions, face blunt as a white canvas. It created a peaceful atmosphere, allowing people to retreat into their own thoughts. 

Then, the silence was interrupted by a sudden jolt as the train lurched violently. Nina was caught off guard, losing her balance and before she could react she was flung forward. She collided with her professor, her body slamming into his hard chest. Her hands instinctively flew out, placing against his chest as she crashed into him, the scent of his cologne filling her senses. 

Alex’s arms were around her in an instant, hand gripping her waist with a firm but gentle hold, keeping her on her toes. “I got you, love.” he grunted, the use of an endearment slipping from his lips. Time seemed to slow as she looked up, her breath hitching as their eyes met. The world outside the train seemed to fade away, leaving only the pair wrapped in each other’s presence. 

Nina opened her mouth, but closed it, not knowing what to say. She was so immersed in his touch that she found herself unable to speak. Her fingers subconsciously curled against the fabric of his shirt as she looked at him. Her heart stammered against her chest, feeling blood rushing through her ears. She grew hot under his touch, his rough fingers tracing down her back was enough to make her pulse quicken. 

“Arriving in Paddington station.” The female announcer said through the speaker, causing the train to come to a stop. Some passengers flew out of the train, others were racing to get a seat or even a comfortable place to stand. 

A soft smile tugged at the corner of Alex’s lips, his firm yet gentle grip on her waist slowly loosening. It was as if he was reluctant to let her go. “There’s your stop,” he whispered, his hand running down her back comfortably before finally letting her go. And he hated that he had to let her go.

Nina seemed to snap back to her state, eyes blinking as she realized that she was still nestled up to his chest. A warm blushed tinged her face and she slowly left her hand, turning to her side to watch the passengers desperately trying to leave the packed train. She felt cold when his hand left her waist, along with the warmth of her face disappearing, as if someone was leaching all of the vibrancy out of her skin. A heavy feeling settled into her stomach and she exhaled before turning back to her professor. 

There was something in the way he was looking at her that made her stop in her tracks. His caramel eyes seemed to hold her in place, making the back of her hair stand up. She wanted to move and exit the train, but it was like her feet were glued to the ground. Her heart was having a war with how it was violently beating, and she wondered if everyone on the train could hear how fast it was thudding. She wanted to say something, but her mind was a swirling fog, preventing her from expressing her thoughts.

Someone brushing their shoulders with hers seemed to pull her back yet again from her spiraling mind. She bit her lip, feet slowly sauntering toward a small group of people ready to leave the train. She halted with her steps and turned her body toward him again with a kind smile. “See you next week, Mr. Turner.” she sheepishly bid her goodbyes, leaving him alone with his thoughts.

He watched her leave in a hurry, her body disappearing into the mass as the door closed. He let out a breath he didn’t know he was holding. A frown was growing on his features, eyebrows creasing his forehead as he looked at the door. His own reflection was staring right back at him and he looked away, his gaze forward as his mind went haywire. 

Nina Collett, who are you really? He thought to himself.

[jaegeraether]

Sunsets and footballers (Part 47)

Lucy Bronze x Reader (42) / Alexia Putellas x Character (11) / Jordan Nobbs x Leah Williamson Mini (4)

Masterlist (other parts here)

YFN put her hand on Alexia’s arm which broke her from her thoughts. They were standing out the front of the Captain’s apartment.

“She’s…like this. She’s not used to people helping,” YFN eased.

“She wanted me… go,” Alexia said in broken English.

“She didn’t want me to stay either and I’ve known her for two decades.” Alexia was still a little upset, but YFN was just glad Ridley hadn’t stayed with Ona at the bar. That would have been a mistake.

“She broke her hand…” Alexia trailed off.

It was aggressive, yes. But she knew Ridley, her intentions, what made her tick and what set her off. “She’s the most protective person I’ve ever met in my life,” she said softly. Alexia’s eyes met hers, curious. "We had a rough upbringing. She’s dealt with a lot of pain, physically and mentally. She’d never hurt anyone she loves…”

“I’m not scared of her…I know she wouldn’t hurt people. She’s very soft.”

YFN was interested at that. She never would have described Ridley as soft, though perhaps it was the language barrier. Alexia must of noticed because she clarified.

“She cares a lot about people…”

YFN nodded, happy that Alexia had seen that. “Yes. Yes, she does. She tries not to show it, but she really does.”

She saw Alexia tighten her hold around the teddy before she gave a smile and a hug to both her and Lucy before she left.

The ride home was silent besides the music but that was mainly because it was getting late, and YFN had an early flight. They were never happy parting ways. Lucy’s hand on her thigh tightened while YFN stroked the inside of her forearm. Her phone buzzed and she looked at it, a response from Ridley.

Riddles: *Sent a photo*

The photo was her hand in a partial black brace, wrapping around her wrist and two little fingers.

Riddles: Just a boxer’s fracture, same as usual.

YFN was all too aware of what that was, as she’d taken Ridley to the ER multiple times for it over the years. Having two black belts meant hard punches and broken bones. She was more concerned about her job though, as she definitely needed two hands for that.

YFN: And work?

Riddles: Off for a week and then I’ll be good with the movement and brace.

“Boxer’s fracture…” YFN murmured to Lucy.

“Oh, I know what that is.”

Of course Lucy would know. Her mind flashed to images of her boxing. “Have you ever had it?”

“Once. It’s painful but at least you’re not standing on it.”

“She’s used to pain, like you…” YFN replied and her hand found the scars on Lucy’s bad knee, tracing them with her fingertips in support. “Can I come and watch you box one day?”

Lucy grinned. “I’d love that. It can be pretty…angry though.”

“I know it’s where you get your frustrations out, love. I won’t distract you, I’ll just sit in the corner and watch you like a stalker.”

Lucy rolled her eyes. “Okay firstly, you’re always a distraction for me, but the best kind. And secondly, too soon on the stalker front.”

YFN chuckled and she leant over just far enough to kiss Lucy’s arm.

YFN: Are you going to let Alexia know?

Riddles: Do you have money on us or something?

YFN: You two are cute…besides the Ona flirting.

Riddles: What can I say? I’m a catch.

Ridley didn’t even try to defend herself because they both knew she hadn’t been flirting back. She’d just been herself. But herself was bad enough. She didn’t want to get involved in Ridley and Alexia’s unspoken thing, however she knew that if she were in Alexia’s shoes she’d want to know how she was.

Riddles: Before you message me again, yes, I will tell her. Safe flight and today was great, we should do it again soon.

YFN: Yes, please. Love you x

“If I didn’t know her, I’d be jealous you were flirting, looking at your phone all smiley like that,” Lucy teased.

“You know her, and you’re still jealous,” she teased back. Lucy pouted. “But it’s okay, I love you all jealous and moody.”

“God, Luce, it’s almost midnight,” she whimpered.

Lucy lifted her head, mouth glistening with excitement and eyes dark with lust. “Are you complaining, little one? I can stop right now-”

“No! No…I just…argh-” she reached down and grabbed her girlfriend, pulling her up on top of her until they were face to face, Lucy bracing her weight on her elbows. YFN dragged her head down and tasted herself on Lucy as their lips met and their tongues fought with groans and moans and excitement. YFN broke away but only for long enough to whisper. “No more teasing, just fuck me, Lucy.”

She reached down and grabbed her strap, lining it up while Lucy watched her face with wonder. She continued to watch her as she slowly rolled her hips and pushed the strap inside of her little Australian, enjoying watching her eyes roll to the back of her head and a moan escape her throat.

She leant down to nip her earlobe before whispering in her ear. “Yes, love.”

Lucy began moving her hips slowly in and out, and YFN could tell from Lucy’s ragged breathing and soft moans in her ear that it was rubbing her in just the right spot. YFN moved her hips with Lucy’s pace, intensifying the pressure of the strap on Lucy’s clit as she enjoyed the length of it moving in and out of her.

“I don’t want you to leave,” Lucy groaned as she fucked her.

Her heart melted. “Luce…I don’t want to leave either.”

“I want you to stay,” she grunted in between her thrusts.

“I want to stay…” she moaned in reply.

“You…argh fuck….you belong with me.”

“I do…” she whimpered. “I belong with you.”

Lucy’s mouth found her neck with passion, kissing and sucking marks into it. Oh, she was needy. She wanted to leave evidence she was there.

“Mine,” she growled softly in between the marks she sucked.

A shiver ran down YFN’s spine. One of her hands was in Lucy’s hair, the other unconsciously dragging fingernails up her back, gripping as she tried to hold herself together. Fuck, it was good. It wasn’t their usual rough, passionate fuck. No. This one was slow and steady, loving and emotional, hitting all of the right places. This was teamwork. Two lovers enjoying each other. YFN’s legs wound their way around Lucy’s hips as she braced her knees better on the bed to start a deeper, harder fuck. Lucy was still pulling out slower than usual, but she entered at pace, thrusting her hips and seemably enjoying the smack on her clit as their hips met with a wet slap. God, she was so wet. Even slowly, they could hear the sound of YFN’s dripping core. She could feel herself tightening the closer she got, Lucy’s glutes paying the price.

“Ah…fuck little one. Fuck you’re tight.”

At those words, YFN’s back arched and she whimpered, Lucy quickened her thrusts and the force in which she fucked her. YFN was a whimpering, moaning mess, clutching onto Lucy like a lifeline.

“Ah…ah…please don’t stop…Luce!”

“You’re mine.” Lucy growled as she again sped up. Fucking relentless, she was.

“I’m y…yours!”

At this point, she could only lay there, clutched to Lucy as she fucked her into the bed, getting her frustration out, her needs, her love, her obsession. YFN cried out her name as she came, Lucy fucking her through it and finishing shortly after. She slowed down until she was finished, undoing the strap and throwing it to the floor. Just as she was about to move away, YFN pulled her down onto her, Lucy’s sweaty body laying on her own as she held her there while they regained their breath. Lucy was the most out of breath, of course. Because it was late, it wasn’t long until they were sleepy, almost drifting off but just before they could, YFN spoke.

“Luce?” She whispered, just loud enough to hear. She wiped the sweat off of Lucy’s brow, pushing the hair off her forehead and tucking those little curly baby hairs behind her ear.

Lucy hummed in response, unable to speak as she hung in a space of lethargy and peace.

“I’ll never stop falling in love with you.”

YFN stared at the photos and couldn’t help the smile crossing her face. Lucy had posted several photos of their past few days in Barcelona together. The first, a picture on YFN half in the water that she didn’t know she’d taken. She remembered looking out over the ocean and it reminding her of home. The second was YFN and Narla having a nap together while Lucy had been making her monster of a sandcastle. Narla was laying flat on her side, her back pressed up against YFN, her head resting on her arm. The third photo was of course Lucy posing next to her sandcastle monster, little spade in hand and a proud grin on her face. Narla had photobombed that one. And the last photo was a selfie Lucy had taken from the bar that had herself, YFN, Ridley, Alexia, and most of the Barca girls in it also.

Lucy Bronze MBE: Love, love, love. *red heart emoji*

Lucy had also tagged her in her caption.

Her heart swelled and she bit her lip. Oh, Luce. She had never had someone so proudly showing her to the world, let alone someone with the amount of followers Lucy did.

Jordan Nobbs liked a post you were tagged in.

Alexia Putellas liked a post you were tagged in.

Caitlin Foord liked a post you were tagged in.

Caitlin Foord: Chickens *red hear emoji* *Australia emoji*

Katie McCabe liked a post you were tagged in.

Katie McCabe: Nice abs

Kyra Cooney-Cross liked a post you were tagged in.

Kyra Cooney-Cross: thanks for the invite

Leah Williamson liked a post you were tagged in.

Riddles liked a post you were tagged in.

Riddles: *fist emoji* *car emoji*

Keira Walsh liked a post you were tagge-

“YFN?”

Her head shot up and found Ruby, immediately blushing as she was just caught. She put her phone down.

“Hm?”

“We were just talking about the office space. It’s huge?!”

They were in their new office in London, and it was a decent size. There was a main, large room with individual desks and set up for everybody’s individual workstations, along with a kitchen, showers and bathrooms, and several separate conference rooms. Knowing exactly who ‘Joe’ was, she wasn’t surprised by the size of it, and just how much furniture and equipment were already set up.

“It won’t feel quite as huge when we have a few hundred people in here,” she laughed.

“A few hundred?!”

“I dare say we’ll be expanding pretty quickly.”

“What are the conference rooms for?” Bridget asked.

“I’m thinking we’ll have a roster and can use them for the groups we have for certain games. So you can meet as a team in there without disturbing everyone else, and we can book them for a certain amount of hours when they’re not being used for that.”

“Great idea!”

“Now does everyone have their car park passes?”

After confirming they did, they sat down for their meeting in one of the conference rooms.

“Alright, welcome, welcome to our new Lumos office. I hope you’re all liking it because it’s going to be home for a while. And as you’ll notice, we have each of the conference rooms set up for people to zoom in, as I understand we all live in different areas and travelling from Birmingham or Liverpool each day doesn't exactly make sense…however this week is an exception. I’ve spoken to you all about this and I’ll apologise again. We just need everybody in for the next three days because of the workload with the new staff starting tomorrow. You will all be paired up into your usual pairs and supervising the groups. Here’s our schedule for this week.”

She gave out their weekly schedule.

Liverpool vs Chelsea (Stamford Bridge, London): Sat 18th Nov 1330 – Bridget, Emily and YFN to supervise.

Everton vs Bristol (Walton Hall Park, Liverpool): Sun 19th Nov 1300 – Ethan and Daniel to supervise.

Brighton vs Arsenal (Broadfield Stadium, Crawley): Sun 19th Nov 1400 – Sam and Olivia to supervise.

Leicester vs Spurs (King Power Stadium, Leicester): Sun 19th Nov 1500 – Bridget and Emily to supervise.

West Ham vs Aston Villa (Chigwell Stadium, London): Sun 19th Nov 1500 – YFN and Noel to supervise.

Man City vs Man United (Old Trafford, Manchester): Sun 19th Nov 1630 – Matt and Ruby to supervise.

“Each pair will have eight crew onsite. Three videographers, three photographers, one interviewer and one editor. It’s your job as supervisors to make sure we’re using everyone efficiently to get the content we expect from so many people. Over the next few days, I’ll be very, very strict with the interviewers on techniques and questioning, and I expect you all to do the same with people in your field of work. We need to start off strong, having forty new people means that there’s room for error. We need to minimise that by ensuring we train the very well and we need to remember that we’re all still fresh and learning too. It’ll be an overload of information, but that’s why you will all be supervising for the first round. Depending on how we go, we may require supervision for a few rounds after, however we’re hoping to aim for that eight-person crew to be running smoothly without the need for the supervision.”

“What do we do if we think the interviewer is asking wrong questions or upsetting the players?” Olivia asked quietly.

“You immediately pull the plug. I’m going to want feedback from you all on all of the individual employees after your game, so we can make sure everybody is on the same page and the people who need extra time practising, get just that. Okay, we have just the one game on Saturday that Bridget and Emily will supervise with eight new staff. If I’m happy with our progress over the next two days with the new employees, then I’ll also attend and leave the rest of you to prep in the office for Sunday. Sunday will be all hands-on deck, full crews on every site as well as two supervisors. Our big game this week is Man City vs Man United at Old Trafford which Matt and Ruby are going to be running…”

YFN made sure she didn’t look at her phone again that day, and it wasn’t that difficult. She loved the logistics of her work. She and her original nine colleagues eagerly discussed their week ahead and brainstormed potential issues and how to overcome them. A few of them had to run down to get stationary, paper, whiteboards and more to fill the conference rooms with supplies and also just get through their day of exciting prep.

The next two days flew by, and the office already felt crowded, but in a good way. Like Javier’s bar. Everyone was excited to work and to learn. YFN had taken the time to get to know everyone prior to meeting them, thanks to the folders put together by Lumos management, and had split them into their groups where she thought it would suit them best. The planning and prep work was intense, but worked out to her satisfaction, even though her standards were high. YFN had even gotten permission from Chelsea to take her team out to Stamford Bridge to get to know it and so the individual teams could practise the best shots for photos, videos and more. YFN left them to their groups as much as she could, letting them work it out together and trusting the supervisors she’d put in charge. She spent a lot of her time at Stamford Bridge talking to Emma Hayes and her Chelsea coaching staff as they ran drills. A few of the players came over to say hi when they had a chance which was rare, because Emma was all over them.

Friday night came with expectation and nerves. They were in Lucy’s apartment with Leah’s stylists as Jordan hadn’t wanted to go to Leah’s place. Too many memories. Jordan and YFN had packed and enjoyed a road trip down for the night from Birmingham, planning on getting being naughty with some take out after the event.

“Oh my god, Ridley was right. This is amazing…” Jordan said as she exited Lucy’s spare room in her suit. YFN and Leah both spun around to Jordan who was now fully dressed and looking unreal. It was a feminine suit, but the first piece of clothing that actually fit her. The accessories were minimal, a silver bracelet, two rings and a simple ear cuff. Jordan’s hair was up, already done by the stylist and her suit perfectly matched Leah’s with its style.

“Are you comfortable? Ridley said you’d want to be comfortable…” YFN said.

“Ridley?” Leah asked.

YFN had explained who Ridley was to Leah previously, though it hadn’t stopped her jealously.

“She picked this outfit for me in Barcelona with YFN,” Jordan grinned, still proud and looking down at herself. “And she was 100% right, I’m very comfortable.”

Leah sighed, standing as she was just finished with her hair. They took a few photos together and they matched so well that YFN had to take a picture to send to Ridley.

Riddles: I said thank me later. It’s later.

YFN: Jordan said thank you for saving her life.

Riddles: I know a few ways she can make it up to me…

YFN: Put it away, Riddles.

Riddles: Aw, you’re no fun. I could pick her up and throw her all around the bedroom.

YFN rolled her eyes, ignoring the last message as Ridley knew she would. When Jordan asked what she’d replied, she only told her the first bit.

They all rode together in a blacked-out, chauffeur driven car and as they got closer, YFN was getting nervous to be alone for the photographs. Jordan felt bad, but she was Leah’s plus one after all. YFN wouldn’t have let her anyways. She was staring at her scar in the window of the car as they arrived, feeling a little self-conscious. Her mind was on Lucy, like it had been since she’d left Barcelona two days ago. Two days and she was already too drained at the feeling of aching without her. Jordan leant over and kissed her cheek, snapping her out of it.

“Just get past this and we’ll meet you inside,” she said before she got out.

Leah put a hand on her knee before she followed. “You look beautiful,” she said with a genuine smile.

YFN followed them. She focussed on the photographers watches and hands instead of the cameras, just as Leah had taught her to avoid being blinded by the flashes. She looked ahead of her and saw them together, their arms lightly touching each other’s backs for the photos. They looked beautiful and what’s more, they were both smiling as if they were together, as if they were happy, and YFN could tell it was genuine with the way they looked at each other between photos.

Once inside, she took a deep breath and the first glass of champagne that came by her. Leah and Jordan found her immediately, the three of them laughing about the aggressiveness of the photographers shouting outside, and the amount of celebrities inside. It was during their third drink to settle their nerves when they were approached by the last person YFN wanted to see.

“I didn’t realise they invited so many women to the Man of the Year award. A bit sexist, isn’t it?” Mark asked.

YFN saw Leah go stiff as she saw him. She hadn’t noticed that the last time they’d met him together.

“Women can’t show up in support for men?” YFN asked.

“You’re not here to support men,” he said, hard. “And I saw your latest little post online, YFN. You and Miss Bronze are going strong, are you?”

“Our relationship has nothing to do with you.”

Over her shoulder, her eye was caught by the sight of William and Catherine arriving to a multitude of camera shutters, blinding flashes and shouts of excitement. Her stomach dropped. She didn’t know she’d be here.

“It just makes it easier for me to prove your conflict of interest,” he shrugged. “But I do hope you had a wonderful time in Barcelona.”

“It was fantastic, thanks for the well wishes,” she replied, purely out of spite.

He didn’t seem to care as he’d already turned to Leah. “And it’s very interesting to see who you chose for a date tonight, Miss Williamson.”

Leah’s jaw locked. “Don’t.”

“Don’t what? I warned you-”

She stepped forward and cut him off. “My lawyers have sorted it. You don’t have anything to threaten me with anymore Mark. Leave.”

He smiled down at her. “You really think that is going to stop it just…slipping out? I can’t help a leak…”

YFN had no idea what they were talking about and from the looks of Jordan, she didn’t either. Mark looked at Jordan and his eyes went down her body and back up.

“Keep your fucking eyes to yourself. Leave.” Leah snapped. Leah never snapped. Jordan’s eyes widened.

“It’s a bit hard to when-”

“Do not finish that sentence,” she warned.

She was standing half in front of Jordan which made YFN think it possibly had something to do with her. He stared at her a moment longer, enjoying the look on her face that was anger and potentially worry, when his attention was caught by something behind YFN.

“Ah, and as if to prove my point.”

A warm hand touched her lower back lightly and the smell of vanilla and bitter orange overwhelmed her as Lucy stepped past and protectively in front of the group. Her hand slid around her hip as she stepped past and took YFN’s hand, holding it behind her and linking their fingers. Lucy. Lucy was here. Lucy. Her body relaxed as she stared at the back of her perfect girlfriend with a look of surprise.

“She told you to leave.”

Mark gave a smirk and opened his mouth but was stopped by Lucy lifting a hand. “Uh uh. Don’t speak. Just fuck off.”

Mark looked like he wanted to argue before his expression changed to something along the lines of apprehension. She couldn’t see Lucy’s face so she didn’t know exactly what she was doing to get that reaction, but she loved it. She put her other hand on top of their already clasped hands in support. Lucy squeezed her hand. Without another word, Mark left, though not without throwing another glance Leah’s direction. Watching him go, YFN caught someone’s eyes briefly lingering on their little exchange in the distance. Catherine. They both looked away.

When he was at a safe distance, Lucy turned, her features shifting from intimidation to adoration as she saw YFN staring at her wide-eyed and unbelieving. She reached out with her free hand and touched one of her dimples lightly. They shared that unspoken word before her hand lowered and she looked at Leah.

“What was that about?”

“Nothing,” Leah responded, her jaw locked.

“Hallo mate!” Jordan beamed and threw her arms around one of her closest friends. “You came!”

“You knew?” YFN asked.

Jordan pulled back, a little sheepish. “I didn’t know for sure. So, you found a flight then?”

Lucy looked at YFN. “Ridley helped me.”

She could have sworn her heart grew twice the size at the thought of Ridley and Lucy helping each other. She had hoped they’d get along and it was slowly coming to fruition.

She couldn’t help but look at what Lucy was wearing. It was an all-black suit, a well-tailored one too, and from the look of it, she was almost certain Ridley had something to do with that also. It was all a similar black besides the button up which was slightly darker and open almost halfway, exposing her neckline down to the space between her breasts, her black bra a little on show. And then there were the accessories, the rings, the necklace, the studs, the cufflinks. 100% Ridley. Lucy noticed her looking and gave a wink, doing some admiring of her own. She stepped closer so their bodies were against each other. They matched.

“Are you going to at least tell me what that was about?” Jordan asked, her focus on Leah.

“There’s nothing to say.”

“Are you joking, Leah?” Oh, Jordan was upset. “You want me to start trusting you again, but you can’t be honest about something that obviously involves me?”

Leah’s eyes closed as she battled with herself. Jordan didn’t wait to see what eventually won out. She turned and walked away, towards the canapés.

YFN went to follow her, but Lucy was first. “I’ll talk to her.” She murmured and gave her girlfriend a lingering kiss on the cheek before she followed her, their arms outstretching to hold each other’s fingertips a little longer as she went.

YFN tore her eyes from Lucy and looked at Leah whose eyes were following Jordan. “Leah…you’re going to have to tell her eventually, otherwise I guarantee he will.”

“I know.”

“So, start with me, and only me. What was that about?”

“I need a drink.”

YFN linked her arm through Leah’s. “Come on then.”

Leah held onto her tight as they wandered to the bar. “It’s about a sex tape.”

[wolfsbane44]

-- Rescue Me--

Summary: Bellamy x Reader. Bellamy rescues you from Mt Weather, knowing you need to get to Clarke. He loves you and will do anything to protect you, and make you happy...including taking you for the first time in the forest.

Warning: NSFW, 18+, Implied harm, implied entrapment and kidnapping, Scars, Mental health, oral (f receiving), unprotected sex, voyeurism, swearing.

I have never done anything with the Reader involved, so It may be a little rough around the edges (or really rough idk lol- but let me know where I can improve)

You and Bellamy had been hiking for miles. With Mt Weather as far as you could put it at your back. So far the Grounders had left you in peace but you weren't sure they wanted to do with anything that came from the mountain. You needed to get to Clarke as fast as you could, but the last time you saw her she was not the same. Lexa dying had changed her, made her into something that no one wished to see. Wanheda had been unleashed, there was no stopping her, she wouldn't even listen to those of us who came down first.

Bel wanted us to stop to find some water and a place to sleep for the night. You were not objecting, especially when he found a small freshwater spring. It was the dead of summer and had to be at least a hundred degrees, and you hadn't seen a shower in lord knows how long. They kept you below. Using your blood and others like you to fix their people. You had been on the Ark with them all, but there was something different in your blood, they would take and take for tests and experiments. Not giving it to their citizens but to their soldiers. They had done this for months now. Scars riddling your arms and legs from the countless needles and restraints they kept you in. 

“Breathe sweetheart” Bel whispered. He could see the terror in your eyes as the memories flooded back into your head. He was the one who had saved you. Your knight in shining armor… if that even existed anymore. He had learned what they were doing to you but knew he couldn't take you out immediately. He had to have a plan, otherwise, he would end up in the cages with you. Every day he brought me fresh food and water. Risking being caught, but he never missed one day. You thought that was honesty the only thing that kept you sane. 

Stripping off your clothes and getting into the spring was agonizing. It wasn't blissful like people talk about after a “hard day's work” -whatever that was, you had only had a hard life, no breaks- there was no relaxing as you stepped in. The cold waters pierced your bones and your still-healing wounds ached. “Let me help you,” he said reaching his hand out to yours. He was already undressed. This was the first time you had seen all of him. But he had seen you like this every day. Shame washed over your face as you pulled away from him. He didn't push further.

Sinking into the water finally, you let yourself be scrubbed clean. You weren't arguing as you were so sore you could barely move. He let you float in the water as long as you needed, although he got out to wash our clothes. They were all you had other than an extra pair of socks and underwear, and the supplies in the bag that Bellamy had brought. Ration bars, canteens, and a knife. He started a fire in hopes that the smoke would keep the bugs away for the night but kept it small in fear of being spotted. Set his traps for small game praying we wouldn't have to eat rations. You got out and put on your clean underwear as you waited for your clothes to dry. It wouldn't be long with the wind blowing in over the valley.

Bellamy had offered to take the first watch but he never woke you up for yours. He knew you needed sleep, especially after watching you thrash all night- dreaming of lord knows what they did to you that you hadn't told him. It hurt him to see you like this, he knew there was nothing he could do to take this pain away. So he did the only thing he knew how to do, hide and protect you. He had done if for his sister on the Ark, and after falling head over heels for you he would do anything for you down here too. Sunrise came slowly. Bellamy heard a twig snap and immediately woke you up. 

With his hand pressed against your mouth, you woke up screaming. It brought back too much, pure panic rushed in your body. You met his stare, his eyes gleaming with nothing but protection and love for you. You knew he wasn't going to hurt you but he wanted you to be able to run if need be. Following him to do what he called a “Perimeter sweep” he discovered it was his trap that had been sprung. A fresh rabbit lay on the ground, still twitching as if its nerves still fighting for its life. Like you had been. 

Bellamy ended it swiftly for the poor creature but you couldn't watch. He let you go back and float in the spring again while he prepared the meat. The small fire was just enough to cook the rabbit. It had been at least a month since you even smelled cook meat, let alone tasted it. Your mouth watered. He cooked your portion first, bringing it to you and letting you enjoy those last few minutes before you had to start hiking again. 

If you were able to keep the pace you were at, you would be able to reach Arkadia by nightfall. Bellamy walked hand in hand with you even singing to you to make the time pass. To make you think of anything other than fear. Stopping for a break around midday, you saw sweat glistening off of him. Taking his shirt off to cool down you saw the muscles that lined his beautiful torso. He caught you enjoying yourself and taking him all in. 

Walking over to you he stooped down and placed a kiss on top of your head, then your nose, and finally your mouth. It wasn't long before his hands found their way into your shirt. Begging him to take it off, as you could see the fire in his eyes. He wanted you, all of you, right here and now. Your kiss hardened and turned passionate, tongues clashing he picked you up and set you on his lap, and you wrapped your legs and arms around him. 

You could feel his length hardening beneath you. The wetness pooling at your core. The ache in your stomach, longing for him to fill you up. He could sense it as he picked you up and laid you on your back in one swift but gentle motion. His body pushing against yours he only stopped to take off your pants. His eyes went straight to your core “Fuck sweetheart, all of that for me” he whined. His eyes meeting yours, all you could do is say “Bel… Please” and he knew what that meant. He was so gentle with you always making sure you were okay. Sitting between your legs he traced one long line up your slit with his tongue. Pure bliss washed over you, you hadn't felt this way in a long time. Before you could think anymore his mouth had begun to ravage you. His tongue flicked small circles on your clit, his fingers teasing your entrance, making sure you would be ready to take him. Slowly he pushed one inside, then another, and you moaned “Bellamy, fuck me please!” pumping a couple more times touching that perfect spot inside you he pulled you close into a kiss.

Reaching for his belt, then his zipper, you pulled his member out as fast as you could. He was above average, but not so big that he would hurt you. He was perfect. Pumping him with your hands a few times he pushed you back and lined himself at your entrance. Passing a glance to check on you, you nodded and he slowly pushed inside of you. All the way to the hilt. Pleasure washed over you as the very tip of him kissed the spot inside that he knew would send you over the edge. He started thrusting slowly. He didn't want to just fuck you. He wanted to love you. This was your first time with him and he wanted you to enjoy it, feeling all of him. He lifted your legs up, positioning your knees by your chest, his hands pushing down on the backs of your thighs and helping him balance. He began slamming into you. White washed over your eyes and ringing pierced your ears before you could tell him you were close. 

Coming back down his hand began making small circles on your clit. He fucking loved seeing you this way, seeing you ride out your high with him buried deep inside you. You were so close to cumming again when you saw his breath stagger. “Come in me” you begged him. You needed to feel his warmth inside of you. Just as you felt that seed spill into you, your own high washed over you sending you back into oblivion. His pumping slowed and came to a halt. He lowered your legs and began cleaning you up. He thanked himself for bringing some hygiene supplies because his thick white cum poured out of you dripping down your bottom. 

You let him clean you and help you get dressed, you both knew you needed to start hiking again if you were going to make it home in time. “That was the hottest shit I have seen in a while Bellamy” came from the trees. Eyes spinning around. Murphy. He really sat there and watched it all. No embarrassment washed over you but relief as you ran to hug him. You had no idea how he escaped the mountain. He was your best friend and had been since you had been imprisoned in the Ark. You never had a thing for him but you could see how pissed Bel was that he watched.

“How about next time I join in” Murphy jokingly shouted from ahead the trail. You smirked at Bellamy knowing this was going to be a long hike home.

[one-vivid-judgment]

Hello. Could I please request some comfort headcanons with Joon-gi, Seonhee, Zhao and Tesso with a verbally domestically abused s/o? Tbh your headcanons and just any random post are kinda soul healing and even therapeutic. They give me strength to mentally deal with any unpleasant situation. So, um, thank you.

I'm so glad my posts give you strength, anon! Tbh I picked up writing myself for therapeutic purposes, so it's good to know someone else is getting something out of this as well! I genuinely wish you the best!

Joongi Han

He can relate, actually. He didn’t exactly have a normal childhood: mom passed away when he was still too young to know any better, and his dad who was already abusive before, turned to drinking and his behavior only got worse. He wouldn’t wish that on his worst enemy, much less someone he loves as much as you.

Thankfully, he is no longer in that stage where he will get queasy talking about the subject because the wound is still too fresh. He would have probably had a breakdown if you had brought up the subject a few years earlier, but now he’s... grown used to it. Any pain is dulled out by now, so you can freely talk to him about your situation. He knows you need someone to turn to, and if he is not that person for you, what kind of boyfriend would that make him?

Will hold you silently and just let you talk, hands running up and down your back. He’ll suggest using the Geomijul surveillance system to keep you safe—even if you say no, he will probably go through with it anyway because he can’t stand seeing you like that. If not the entire Geomijul, just himself is enough. He can free up hours of his schedule to watch over you; Seonhee will understand. It will also be her who suggests he brings you over to the Geomijul to stay for good. They have enough bowguns left and are still a threatening enough presence around Ijincho to know no one would dare mess with them.

Seonhee

Unlike Joongi, she hasn’t gone through abuse herself. She’s heard the horror stories from Yeonsu though, so she has some idea of just how bad it can get. Enough to be absolutely fucking fumming by the time you are done telling her about your situation. You can be sure she will take matters into her own hands, even if you try to stop her.

Don’t worry, it won’t be anything like straight up murdering your abuser (though, why lie, she really wants to, and the Geomijul has the means to do that; she can ask Zhao for help disposing of the body, too. Meat bun filling). She will, however, make sure there is always someone watching over you. Most likely Joongi, but if he is out of comission, then it will be anyone else. If it gets too bad, she will do the watching herself. And if it gets real bad? Seonhee is outright snatching you away. She can make extra room for you in the Geomijul HQ, to make sure that person is too scared to come get you.

Not a day goes by where she doesn’t ask you how you are holding up. She’s seen what abuse can do to a person (see, Yeonsu, and to an extent, Zhao), and she has learned the importance of asking those questions. You can come to her with whatever is troubling you, you know that, but she still makes sure to remind you.

Zhao Tianyou

It will take you some time to convince him not to do anything that could potentially land him in jail. You’ve never seen Zhao so mad in your life, and he doesn’t usually yell for no good reason, but man, does he want to kill the bastard that’s putting you through all this. But he also knows it wouldn’t be useful (albeit pretty satisfactory) to get thrown in the slammer and leave you alone.

You Tian is your new home. You can stay for as long as you want: hours, days if you want to. Anything that doesn’t involve you going home to your abuser sounds great in his book. His Liumang loyalists are now basically your full time bodyguards, and if that doesn’t work to intimidate the asshole in question, he’ll have to give them a very stern talking-to. Full of death threats and intimidation tactics. It will prove hard to not take his saber with him though.

He makes sure to be extra sweet to you. Always cooking your favorite dishes, always making sure you are feeling okay. He’ll introduce you to Kasuga and the others if you are up for it, and they’ll quickly become your biggest and best support network. To be honest, Zhao may have grown a little paranoid after the whole ordeal and might need to have you within eyeshot to make sure you are safe. He knows, he knows. But he won’t let it go too far to the point it gets unhealthy.

Tesso

Honestly, he wants to get angry. Hell, he should get angry! But all he can muster is hug you.  He is at the verge of crying when he does. He’s a sensitive man, these things affect him, and the fact that you are going through that when you don’t deserve it at all? Well, you bet your ass it upsets him.

It’s not professional of him, but he’ll admit he sometimes skips Liumang work to go check on you. Like Zhao, he might get a little paranoid about what happens to you when you are out of his sight. He might have hired Tsukumo and Sugiura (Yagami too, if he happens to be in Yokohama) to keep an eye on you; as far as he’s concerned, that’s money well spent. He wishes he could do more—he’ll suggest you run away and stay at his apartment in Restaurant Row. It’s deep enough in Liumang turf that it’s pretty much guarateed your abuser won’t chase after you, if they have half a brain.

His hugs are therapy in and of itself. Helps that he’s a cuddler and pretty much can’t sleep if he isn’t hugging you. Now that he knows what you’ve had to go through, he has all the more reason to do that. He can’t help the smile when he wakes up and sees that you are by his side and not back at that shitty home you grew up in.

[achillean-knight]

WOOO!! Rough Henry design LMAO bonus mini comic thing, BC why not

Y'all try on your mates glasses too, right?

-- Notes under the cut --

- He never shaves his moustache LMAO he does his beard, tho.

- Along with William, he needs glasses to see, but his eyesight is dramatically worse then Wills LOL

- The design is like-- sorta a combo of Henry's Novel and Character files design BSBSVSVSV

- This is his work attire, he wears suitable clothes for engineering ofc

- His wife left 🫡 as to why is unknown. They never fought to the extent of her leaving, but she left Henry behind one day, and Charlie. Charlie constantly thinks about it, but all she and Henry know, is Henry's wife left on good terms.

- Henry was the one to sing "my grandfather's clock" to Charlie as she grew up. Charlie was so fixated over the song, she would hum or sing it whenever they passed a Grandfather clock at the shops. Eventually, Henry created a smaller then average grandfather clock as a gift. This is why it calms the puppet.

- Henry has a habit of getting stressed and frustrated if work isn't going the way he wants. He doesn't lash violently out but he does request quiet and loneliness if he gets too heated. He has a personal punching bag in his shed.

- He originally created Carnie which later was repurposed into Lefty.

- After Charlie's death, he fell into severe depression. He drank heavily and it wasn't until he was confronted by Michael again, that he started seeing a therapist. He is still on edge alot and suffers from his mental health.

-- Relationships --

William:

- His relationship with William is very close lol romantically involved? No clue. Maybe they are, maybe they aren't, I seriously haven't decided, just like I haven't decided with Mike and Jeremy lmao

- Henry is William's crutch. He feels jealousy toward him, but ultimately relies on him most of the time after his own wife left (on bad terms). Henry doesn't mind, though.

- William is considered family to Henry.

- He is also the one to discover Williams corpse inside springbonnie and decided to board up every single safe room. Yikesssssss

- Strangely, Springtrap doesn't act violent toward Henry. He stares just- silently. Watching.

Charlie:

- Loves his daughter more than anything in the world.

- He passionately encourages Charlie's path in wood work after discovering her love for wooden crafts like the aforementioned Grandfather clock and various types of Puppets. Sometimes, if supervised, Henry hands her a block of wood and tools and lets her craft away. She finds peace in wood calving and Henry's utterly joyful.

- He struggles to recognise the Puppet as his own daughter, and unknowingly put her through so much pain when being caught by Lefty. It was only after the capture did he find out that of course the puppet is possessed by his daughter 😭 he just thought it was possessed by a very vengeful ghost. He didn't know that ghost possesed Golden Freddy, and that's why he's not in FNAF Pizzaria Simulator :')

Michael:

- He's on edge around Mike. He reminds him too much of Will.

- After Crying Child and Elizabeth died, aswell as Charlie's murder and William disappearing (he got spring locked rip), Michael lived with Henry shortly before disappearing himself. (He went to the SL bunker.)

- Henry looks after post-scooped Michael.

- Henry doesn't anticipate Mike to be the one to work at the Pizzaria Sim location-- but he knows this is where he wants to be.

[wreckerdecker]

Baby Talk

Tech fans… we’re all hurting right now. I decided to help ease the pain: the world NEEDS Tech bonding with baby!Omega. All fluff, no hurt, short and sweet Tech-centric baby AU. 

----

“You should stop talking to her like that.”

Wrecker’s mouth clamps shut and he looks over at his brother. In his hands he’s holding Omega, who’s absolutely beaming with joy. He’s crouched on his knees on the floor of the bunk room. Tech stands a few feet away, gazing neutrally at the two of them.

“What’s wrong with the way I talk to ‘er?” 

Gloved fingers tap away at his datapad. “Your baby talk. It holds little to no developmental value to her speech skills.”

It’s silent as Wrecker blinks slowly and looks back at their sister. She gives him a open-mouth, gummy smile in return. He looks back up at Tech.

“Omega is a baby?”

Tech nods. “Correct. But she needs more mental stimulation than baby talk provides. Full-sentences, preferably.”

Wrecker stands-- his knees audibly cracking on the way up-- and Omega coos as he pulls her closer to his chest. He closes the gap between Tech and himself with barely more than a single step. The datapad is ignored as he shoves the baby into Tech’s arms. Wrecker laughs when it clatters to the floor in favor of Omega.

“Alright, then. You love talking, so you do it!” He leans down and gives Omega a kiss on the forehead, then gives Tech’s shoulder a gentle (well, gentle for Wrecker) punch on the arm. “I’ll be outside. Have fun!”

Tech and Omega look at one another awkwardly once he exits the ship. 

Oh, dear.

“Okay, Omega. I’m sitting you down now.”

It’s a half-hour later. After being forced to take a small detour that involved a warm bottle of formula, Tech decided to work on the cockpit passenger seat and the horrific grinding squeak it had recently developed. He’d warned his brothers to stop dropping into it so roughly all the time. Had they listened? Clearly not. But what else is new.

Meanwhile, Omega sits curiously in the other chair. Tech had swiveled it so she was facing him, fully able to watch what he’s doing. 

“I’m going to fix this chair,” Tech says out loud. “And hopefully give you some speech lessons as I go.”

So far, Omega has little to say about the matter. She eyes the toys Tech had placed in front of her-- as interesting as chair repair is, he knows better than to expect her to pay full attention. She grabs the closest one and starts chewing on it. 

“I’m looking for an appropriate tool,” Tech says as he roots through his toolbox. As much as he enjoys organization, it is a community toolbox, and there’d sooner be peace to the galaxy than successfully convincing his brothers to put stuff back where it belongs. “I need to remove the outer base cover to investigate the squeaking.”

As expected, he gets no response. He continues on, narrating his way through the process, only occasionally glancing up to make sure the baby wasn’t in danger of falling from the chair. He’s applying an oil spray to the offending spring joint when he hears a soft thud. It’s not heavy enough to be Omega, so he takes his time in turning his head over to investigate. 

On the floor is one of Omega’s toys. It’s a limp-bodied doll, painted to represent reg clone armor. One of Omega’s favorites. She’s gazing down sadly at it.

“You dropped your doll.”

She looks up at him and for a split second he swears she gives him a ‘no shit’ look she had to have learned from Hunter. But it’s quickly replaced with distress. 

Tech expedites his repair and quickly throws the base back on the chair and has it secure with a few twists of his wrench. He sits up, wiping his hands off on the front of his shirt, and grabs the toy off the floor. 

“Here you are,” he says politely as he hands it back to his sister. Her wide grin makes him smile. “This is when people would usually say thank you. It’s a signal of gratitude, and often considered polite.”

She proceeds to shove the left arm of the doll in her mouth. 

“Since you’re currently incapable of speaking, I’ll give you a pass for now.” He winks at her. He decides not to think about the contaminants running rampant on the cockpit floor, and how many she probably just introduced to her system. She’s got to build her immune system somehow, after all.  

He sits down on the newly repaired seat. It creaks a little, but the grinding squeak is no longer. He nods in satisfaction. 

“I’ve enjoyed having you here with me, Omega. You’ll make a fine repair assistant some day.”

He means it, too. Though she’s currently busy drooling all over the doll, he can see a spark of intuitiveness and wit within her every time she’s introduced to something new. The way she reacts to stimuli implies a deeper intelligence than one might expect. She’s going to be a sharp child soon, and he can’t wait to be there for it. 

“Are you having fun?” He asks amusedly. He leans forward and grabs her other toy-- a hollow round ball filled with beads-- and shakes it a little. She finds this hilarious, and waves her little arms with joy. He touches the orb to the top of her tiny foot, then to the other. 

“These are your feet,” he says, smiling, watching her watch the ball. “Shin, knee, thigh.” He boops each corresponding body part as he says them, the toy rattling as he goes. “Stomach, chest, arm.” 

Omega shrieks in delight. Tech can’t help but laugh with her. 

“And this is your nose.” He puts the ball gently up to her face, rattling it against her little button nose. “You use it to smell.”

He puts the ball down on the seat in front of her. He expects her delight to follow it, but when his hand unblocks her face, he realizes she’s gazing-- in all her unbridled joy-- up at him. His mouth twitches with an unidentified emotion. 

“And... and you are my younger sister,” he finds himself saying, pointing at her. He turns the finger to himself. “I’m your older brother.”

Though she’s squirming with joy, he can tell she’s listening. Her eyes follow him, and he hopes she can understand. 

“You’re my little sister, and I am your big brother. And I love you very much.”

Her eyes sparkle. Something in his chest twists in the best way. He lowers himself out of his seat and onto his knees, so he’s closer to eye level. He rests his hands on either side of her chair as if protecting her. She gazes intently at him.

“You are 216 days old. Your first tooth is coming in any day now. You live here on the Marauder with Hunter, Wrecker, Echo, and myself. You can’t talk yet but I suspect you will very soon. Everything about you is incredible.”

He says it steadily and confidently, because everything he’s saying he knows to be a fact. There’s a small beat of silence, but it’s quickly filled with Omega’s gentle whining. She reaches her arms out to him-- he can’t imagine a single galaxy where he wouldn’t hold her here and now. He holds her tightly and starts rocking side to side. She nuzzles against his collar. 

Tech, like the rest of his brothers, is a natural solider. He’s familiar with the rare cracks and splits of the endless wall that is war. In those grooves you could find rest, maybe even some sparse and patchy solace. 

But this... this is peace. And it’s a new, beautiful feeling. 

[hoosurdaddy]

Chapter 8.

Pairing: post covid! Stan Marsh x post covid! Reader, post covid! Kenny McCormick x post covid! reader.

Triggers: 18+, cheating, smut,gaslighting, fighting.. Reader is married to Stan, bad grammar, short.. Rushing this so I'm finally finished a series

--

Since the secret was out, you hadn't heard from Stan for the past few days despite the fact you had called and texted him, begging for him to come home and how you were willing to make things rights. You hadn't really slept or talked to anyone since. You had texted Kyle to see if he found anything about Stan, from his vague replies you had suspected that he was staying with him. At least he was safe.

Heidi had texted you about the entire situation and she seemed to be the only non-judgmental person talking to you right now. South Park was a small place, rumours were easily spread. You couldn't remember much from when Stan left, but you knew your two week holiday was up and you had to return to work.

When you walked into the door of the building, you could already feel the judgmental whispers and stares, while doing your best to ignore them but you couldn't, not even Butter's glares at you each time he walked by. You couldn't even eat your lunch in peace without people looking at you. You had just sat at your desk all day, pretending to be doing something. Until a fax came through for Kenny, which you had to deliver, which would stir up more rumors'.

But you held your head high when you entered his office. And there he was. His face was still swollen, you couldn't imagine how it looked before with all the blood. His lip was cut, his nose and eye were black, along with a few bruises on his arm. "Hey." You whispered as you handed him the fax, which he muttered a thank you.

You stood there for a moment as Kenny got a few more sheets for you to take out to your desk. "Why."

Kenny knew that the two of you were hot gossip around South Park, especially after the incident that took place at iHop. Kenny could see your eyes were sad and tired. You were a mess, you looked even worst than he did.

Kenny just shrugged. "You said you felt guilty."

"I do, but that was up to me to tell Stan."

"You weren't the only person involved."

There was no denying that Kenny was hurt, physically and mentally. He was always in pain from watching Stan hug and kiss, especially on your wedding day when Stan slipped that ring on your pretty finger, Kenny knew he had fallen in deep. Kenny always wanted you. You made him so fucking happy, you made Kenny feel like human. Even the nights when you'd rearrange plans with Stan to be with him. Kenny craved you so badly, but after this week events; he wasn't sure what was going to happen to either of you.

"If this was you trying to get back at me for ending things than fine. I guess I deserve it, but Stan did not." Kenny could take a thousand beatings from Stan and be okay, but with you, talking about your 'mistake' made Kenny want to remove him eyes. "I'm sorry Ke-."

Kenny held his hands up to stop you. "No, I'm sorry." Kenny figured this would have you running into his arms for him to take you back, but if anything, it made him look disgusting. "I have to go, faxes, lunch.." He rambled, moving past his desk and pasted you, leaving you standing there.

--

Tired, you dragged yourself into the house. You saw your parents car along with Stan's outside your house, and you could only think the worst. All you wanted to do was throw yourself onto the couch and cry yourself to sleep (somewhat). It surprised you Stan was home, but also extremely happy and nervous about what you were walking into.

In the kitchen, your dad sat there with Stan, laughing and smiling as your mom cooked what looked like to be burgers. Stan loved your dad, he was a stable father figure to him when his wasn't available. Stan always loved the feeling of family, and being around your family had helped Stan in his sobriety, especially when you both decided you wanted children.

"Honey." Your mom greeted as she walked up to you and hugged you while your dad smiled at you. Stan sat there, stoned face, but your parents didn't seem to notice. "Stan invited us to dinner. We're so glad you're home." Your dad continued, patting Stan on the back.

"Yeah, today was.. mad." Your voice was dry.

"Yeah, Stan was filling me in on all that happened this week."

You internally panicked, wondering what your husband had just told your parents. You figured it was nothing serious, or else your parents wouldn't be happy. You looked at Stan, who shook his head, letting you know that you were safe and that he didn't say anything about your affair. Your parents stayed for dinner, your dad had to much fun doing the wash up with Stan. They were both laughing and joking, while your mom sat with you, discussing about Uncle Derek's latest adventure to Australia.

When your parents finally left, you went upstairs to your bedroom. You noticed what a mess the room was in with Stan's clothes everywhere. You figured he was moving his stuff out. You heard foot steps coming up the stairs, it was Stan.

"What Stan? I'm a lying slut, you hate me."

"I don't hate you." Stan announced, leaning against the door. "Trust me, I want too. Some of us take our vows more serious than others." He continued, walking over to were you were sitting on the bed as he reached over to hold your hand. "I had called your parents to come get your stuff, and tell them about what had happened, but when they got here and I began talking to them.. You know your dad doesn't think I'm a total loser, he told me he was proud of my sobriety even while running a whiskey company." Stan let out a chuckle. His own dad never told him he was proud of him, let alone try help him get sober when he needed to be most. But he done it, and he would do it again.

"You were never a loser." You muttered, squeezing Stan's hand as you listened to him ramble. You had to becareful with your words. "Listen, I get it when we divorce you can still be friends with my dad."

"Divorce?" Stan shook his head. He wasn't going to throw away his entire marriage over a mistake that you made. "No way. Y/N I am not throwing away my whole fucking marriage over McCormick, okay? I don't know how but you're going to fix it."

You inhaled as you stared at him. You hadn't even considered fixing your marriage since that didn't seem like what Stan wanted, but he did. He was willing to give you a second chance. Stan wrapped his arms around you as you cried into his chest. The past few days had been lonely without him.

"Stop crying." Stan whispered as he hugged you. "You're going to make things right."

"How? How can I make any of this better?"

Stan sighed as he pulled away from you. "I wanted to tell you when things were right.. But there was a buy out on an old whisky company in Wyoming, and my company bought it.. It would be great to expand the market and for growth of the company, which means when the company is starting I will have to be in Wyoming a lot, which is about a seven hour drive." Stan started. "I want you to quit your job and move to Wyoming with me to start a new life without Kenny."

"Stan, I-"

"I am not giving up on this marriage because of Kenny. No way." Stan gripped your hands tightly. "You can fix this by leaving your job, and coming to Wyoming with me. We can have a fresh start, where no one knows who we are, or what has happened..So are you going too?"

You shrugged. "I don't know."

"You don't know?" Stan didn't think he was being unreasonable by asking so much. After all, you were the one who ruined your marriage when you decided to sleep with his best friend. He could of divorced you and went to a strip club, like Kyle had suggested. But he didn't. He wanted you. He wasn't going to lose you to Kenny. You had to work your ass off to make this right, and until Stan could forgive you; he would be the one in charge. "I can tell you my decision."

"Can I think about it? I'd be leaving my parents, our friends."

"I don't think you'd wanna hear what our so called friends are saying about you right now." Stan spat at you, making your head drop. He was right.

You nodded. Stan stood up as he planted a kiss onto your forehead. "I'll give you till Tuesday to think about it, 4:30. You better have a decision." You nodded again, feeling the tears welling back up in your eyes but this time, Stan wiped your eyes and gave you a kind smile (which you didn't deserve). "I'm going to stay at Kyle's until then. I'll see you soon with a decision."

You nodded again. Stan had left. You checked the day on the calendar, seeing that it was Saturday. You had a whole two days to make a decision that will affect the rest of your life, but regardless the consequence of your actions, and now you were paying for it.

[isara0408]

Another headcanon for Homu, which involves Kaga and his cloning machine. It's another emotional headcanon for Homu.

Homu stepped inside the science club to find it empty. She glanced at the spot. Kaga always stood there and researched on his super computer about Saikou Corp as he always did. He always tried finding ways to get hired by Saikou Corp just like his parents. Homu didn't blame him. Saokou Corp is the wealthiest and most powerful company in Japan. Who wouldn't want to work with Saikou Corp?

Homu's eyes spotted a certain tab opened on Kaga's large super computer screen that he most likely forgot to close up,"And he forgot to close it."She mumbled. She made her way towards the computer and slid her index finger against the glass mouse pad. She was able to click the red X in the left upper corner but stopped once her eyes landed on a certain word that caught her attention.

"Clone?"Homu whispered out. She started to read the entry on the screen, skimming through it.

"Research on clone 1431 'Midori Gurin' has been a success. No human has noticed the difference between the real Midori and the clone. Midori has been behaving just like the real one since the moment she was released from her tube. She's exactly like the original. How fascinating. I wonder if the other clones will behave the same. Will they behave differently? These clones feel just like the original person... as if the person was brought back from the dead or had a twin. This is a success! I'm sure Saikou Corp will hire me for this!"

"As if the person was brought back from the dead... or had a twin."Homu repeated the words she read mentally as her eyes widened as big as they could go,"All this time... I was just wasting it on a robot to bring my twin back, but I can actually bring her back. I can bring her back as if she never died."Homu whispered to herself, keeping the same widened eyes. Her body immediately started to tremble at the thought of her twin sister being back to life as if she had never died in the first place. Her hands gripped onto the edge of the table of the super computer once she felt her breathing becoming uneven.

All this time, the answer, the solution to my pain was right in front of me. All this time, it was in front of me.

"Homu!"

Homu slowly turned around to face Kaga when she snapped out of her thoughts. Kaga had a smile on his face like he always did during the day in Akademi. Something Homu was already used to, just like everyone else. Homu stared at Kaga with the same widened eyes as her chest rose up and down rapidly. He's my tool. He's the solution I needed.

Kaga noticed Homu's strange change in attitude. He raised an eyebrow,"Homu, are you alright?"He questioned.

"Clones. You're making clones of Midori."Homu spoke out with a trembling voice while she pointed at the screen of the super computer. Kaga glanced over at the screen behind her,"Ah, of course I am. Midori volunteered for me to clone her. So far, the clones are doing well."

"Why didn't you tell me anything?"

"Uh, because it's my business?"Kaga slowly said, staring at Homu again. He watched Homu's body trembling more by the answer he gave her. Homu's hands slowly turned into trembling fists,"All this time, I was trying to bring back my twin sister through a metal robot for months. My goal was to bring her back to me by a metal robot that who knows how long it will take me to finish while you make clones of a person that looks and acts exactly like the original individual. As if the person was brought back from the death... or had a twin."

Kaga stood there listening to her. Homu immediately grabbed onto the collar of his lab coat, bringing Kaga closer to her. Kaga's eyes widened as the eyes of Homu were filled with rage, a rage Kaga hadn't seen in Homu,"All this time, you were the tool I needed to bring her back! You kept this a secret from everyone! You're my only chance I have to actually bring her back! Flesh and blood! Bring her back as if she ever died! A mistake that can be fixed!"Homu shouted at him with trembling hands still holding onto his collar of his lab coat.

"Homu, I can't bring your sister back. The clones are still under testing. There's many things I need to look over and make sure nothing goes wrong. Just because a clone Midori is out of her tube doesn't mean she's perfectly fine. She's a clone. Not the real person. Many things can go wrong-"

"I don't care! I want my sister back, and you're the only person who can do it! I need her here with me!"

"I can't do it!"Kaga glared at her,"I can't risk it. I'm already risking myself with Midori! The clones need to be tested and make sure nothing is wrong or goes wrong with them. You need to understand that I'm the first person ever to clone a human being and even make cloning possible. I need to test, I need to research, and I need to make sure nothing goes wrong with these clones or the process of making them."

"You have no idea how long I've waited to bring her back. How many times have I cried just to see her again and be here with me since that crash! I saw her with my own eyes, her life leaving her eyes! I was the last person she saw! I had no strength to save her that day! You have no idea how it feels to lose a loved one because you have your parents with you. You never suffered a loss before, especially from a family member's passing. Your family is complete, but mine isn't. I've worked hard to plan out that robot over there to resemble my twin! I don't know how long it will be to fully finish her and to even make her act like my twin! My other half! You're the only person who can bring her back! I can finally have her with me as if she never died..."Homu cried out as her eyes crowded up with tears. Some escaped the corners of her eyes,"You're my only chance to finally have her here with me after trying so hard to make a metal robot to bring her back..."Homu's grip loosened slightly. She glanced down as her body continued to tremble.

Kaga stared at the woman in front of him, listening to the quiet sobs of desperation, heartbreak, and pain.

"Take my DNA, take my blood, take anything you need to bring her back, please. Bring my other half back. Please, I just want to see her spark again. I want to see her again..."Homu sobbed out, watching the tears fall from her face to the floor,"She's everything to me.... please."

Kaga's expression softened at the sight of his closest friend being in an unstable state," I'm sorry, Homu. I can't bring her back. Not at this moment. I need time with the cloning machine. I need to make adjustments, testing, and make sure no major problems come."

"But I want her here now..."Homu cried, still holding onto Kaga's lab coat for dear life.

"I know. All I need is time."

"How much...?"Homu slowly glanced up at Kaga again with tears still rolling down her cheeks uncontrollably. Kaga replied with unsureity, "I'm not sure." Homu stared at him before slowly looking over at the robot on the assemble holder. How long do I have to keep waiting? How long...?

Kaga pushed Homu's hands from his lab coat before wrapping his arms around her tightly, giving her a tight embrace. Homu leaned her head against his shoulder as her eyes remained on the robot. She wrapped her arms around Kaga, returning the embrace and burying her face onto the shoulder of her leader. A painful sob escaped Homu.

"I need time. That's all I ask for."Kaga spoke, keeping his arms wrapped around the sobbing and trembling woman.

"Okay..."Homu whispered emotionally. Her sobs continued, keeping her face buried onto Kaga's shoulder to muffle her loud sobbing.

Meanwhile, Meka, Yaku, and Horo stepped inside the science club, talking among themselves. Once they stepped inside, they stopped on their tracks to see Kaga hugging Homu and hearing the sobs of Homu as well. Yaku's visor displayed question marks,"What happened?"

Kaga shot them a glance as a sign that he would tell them later. The three noticed the message and nodded before making their way towards them and started to comfort their friend.

[furyohin4urr20]

Please tell us the name of the randy fanfiction you wrote 🙏

anon i am so sorry to have left you in here for so fucking long i really am 😭😭😭

i never posted the fic anywhere bc i never finished it so methinks i'll post it here

Randy Jade x OC Fanfiction (Title TBD)

By Fu Ryohin

Chapter One

Chapter Synopsis: This basically plays out like the subway mugging scene in-game, with some changes to fit in with my own mental illness 🫶

It's a chilly evening on the subway, as Penny stands by the doors, nail-polished fingers holding onto the safety pole as she looks at her watch. Her coat pockets jingle with change and crumpled bills from her shift at Bunny's Burgers, all courtesy of her satisfied customers, as she sways backward from the train's speed taking her to her cozy apartment uptown.

'Today was rough', she stares pensively at her boots, sighing as she contemplates her work day with fellow coworker, Mile.

'We were understaffed, a large party came in and occupied 3 booths and a table, and left a mess I cleaned up myself, and Mile was getting yelled at for dropping the cash box while managing the cash register.' Her screen goes dark as she lay deep in her thoughts until she saw out of the corner of her sensor someone moving into a double seat across from her and her pole.

It was a tall, knife-headed man, unfamiliar to her, with a malevolent glint on his blade. Well, she perceived it to be so, considering light can't be malevolent, but does it really matter? He sat next to a man in a denim jacket, covered in what appeared to be mud stains and water, with a foul odor following him, much to Denim Man's slight panic. Penny slowly moved slightly closer and began to eavesdrop ever so cautiously.

"Look, I'll say it again only once", the suspect man sneered, as he pulled what looked like a gun out of his coat pocket. "Hand over the wallet, bozo, and I'll let you off the hook scot-free. If not, your dumb, phone face GETS IT. Deal?"

Shakily, without lifting his head, Denim Man whimpered quietly, “P-please, sir, I don’t have any money, just, just some loose change...” Denim Man was shaking with fear holding an expression of what seemed to be pure dread.

“Well, better than nothing, I guess”, the mugger replied. “Hand it over before I stab you, so help me Phone-God!”

Penny started to feel sick to her stomach, a lump welling in her throat. Surely she couldn’t leave the poor man to get mugged of all he had? She started weighing her options quickly.

The train started to slow, lunging everyone slightly forward, and suddenly, an idea manifested itself. This is her stop. Penny stepped forward slowly, making pace closer to the mugger.

“Leave him alone!”

She heard herself gasping, and immediately covering her mouth in alarm. Why did she say that?! She felt the color drain from her face as the mugger stood up and faced her, towering over her.

“Hey, Sweetcheeks, stay out of this if you don’t wanna see this cuck blown away, y’hear me?”

She stood there, frozen, trembling, forcing herself to respond to the criminal’s threat. “I-if you leave him alone, I’ll, I’ll give you my tip money for the night”, she managed to squeak out, “But leave him alone, o-okay? Surely it’s more than what you’d get out of him.”

The air was still for a brief second, but to everyone involved, it felt like an eternity. The Denim Man looked up at her, in grateful shock, before gesturing for her not to intervene with his bandage-wrapped hands. “Finally, at least I'm getting something out of this,” The Mugger grumbled. Penny rummaged through her bag for a few moments, silently refraining from making eye contact with the bladed robber.

In a split second, she grabbed her pepper spray, undid the cap while still in her bag, and let it rip on the mugger’s face, in a fiery cloud. The mugger immediately folded over in pain, dropping his gun, which revealed an empty cartridge.

“MY EYES! GOD FUCKING DAMMIT, I DON’T EVEN HAVE ANY?!” The Mugger screamed in agony. “YOU’LL PAY FOR THIS, YOU FREAK! I HAVE MOB CONNECTIONS! I’LL FIND YOU AND BANDAGES OVER THERE AND MAKE YOU PAY FOR FORCING ME TO THINK ABOUT THE BIOLOGICAL MYSTERIES OF MY EXISTENCE!"

Penny grabbed Denim Man’s hand and quickly pulled him to the now open-subway doors, and bolted out into the station and onto the streets of Uptown DIaltown. She had never felt so scared before, but at the same time, she was euphoric on the adrenaline rush. She had stopped a man from getting mugged on the subway, almost single-handedly! It may be a good idea to check on him, he seemed very shaken up.

“Oh, my Phone-God, are you okay, dear?!” She worriedly asked, still huffing and heaving from the run. He was sobbing quite loudly, and in quite a messy way, too. Let’s not get into the details of how a phone can cry.

“W-why, why did you do that?!” He finally managed to sputter, in between sobs and heaving, hitching breaths. “You don’t even, even KNOW me! Why would you risk yourself, f-for a schmuck, a bum like ME?!”

She looked at the messy, blubbering wreck in front of her and heaved a heavy sigh. “I... I don't know. I don’t know what came over me. I just, started moving without thinking,” She replied, much to her own surprise. “I think it was instinct. But, anyway, what’s your name?”

“I-it’s Randy, Miss... uh...” He wavered.

“Oh, um, it’s Penny! Penelope Sciarte. Just stick with Penny, okay?” She chuckled awkwardly. “Anyway, what led to you, um, getting on the subway? From the sound of it, you didn’t even have enough to get on in the first place.”

“O-oh, right... I, um, this is going to sound pathetic, I’m sure, but uh...” He muttered while looking down at his bandaged hands. “I got chased down here by swans. I managed to get in through the doors before they closed.”

Penny stopped in concern and slight awe. “A swan would go out of its way to chase you down from the park to the subway?" She added in astonishment. "I knew they were rude but not outright cruel.”

“Well, you really see to the worst side of them when you spend your days trying to wrangle them every day for a pittance.” He sighed and briefly exchanged his final pleasantries with Penny before starting to walk in the opposite direction.

“Wait! Are you sure you’re okay to walk by yourself? Where are you headed, dear?” Penny inquired, attempting to ensure Randy didn’t run into any more trouble.

He hesitated. “Look, thank you for your help back there, but I don’t want to cause you any more trouble. I’m going to my dumpster, it’s really all I have left at this point.” He looked up at her, her screen flickering pensively.

“D-did you say, dumpster?” Her face lit up. “No wonder you looked familiar! You’re the guy who’s been squatting in Bunny’s dumpster for the past few years!”

Randy’s expression became wearier as she mentioned this. “Yeah, that’s me, but you could probably tell simply by the SMELL that follows me everywhere. there’s no point in complaining. If there is a God, he certainly isn’t a merciful one. After all, he created those portents of pure maliciousness that we call SWANS.”

“Well, are you sure you don’t need a place to stay for the night?” She asked, and realized just how much of an idiot she sounded like for inviting a stranger into her house.

“W-well, I know it sounds kind of, um, sudden and odd, but I assure you, it’s much better than staying in a filthy dumpster after such a rough day.” She felt the air coming out of her vents heating up at the thought of a stranger in her home.

“I couldn’t possibly intrude, and you’ve done enough for one night,” He quickly responded as he tried his best to avoid eye contact with her. He sighed and shook his head. "I know how busy things are at Bunny's, the last thing you need is another lousy burden on your shoulders."

She looked him in the eyes.

"Oh, nonsense!" She insisted. "I won't be able to sleep tonight worrying that you're sleeping in that greasy dumpster and I have a very busy shift tomorrow! You'd be doing me a favor by staying in my home, even if it's just for tonight."

She didn't seem to notice while speaking she had cupped his bandaged hands in hers, much to her own surprise. She pulled back nervously.

"Oh, er, sorry." He stood there silently, impressed and slightly intimidated by her.

She took notice of this, and countered, "You don't have to say anything, just nod your head yes or no, dear." He started to tear up again and started shaking his head up and down in agreement.

She took his hand and directed him to follow her down the row of buildings in Uptown Dialtown, as the night brought down a cool chill and lit the light posts. Somehow, somehow, despite this, both felt a warmth inside them, faintly glowing with each step.

This doc was last edited on 2/15/2023 ☠️☠️☠️

[sailorsharky]

⚓️Journal of a Sailor V⚓️

-= Log: 1=-

-= Day 1=-

-= Time of writing: 1930 =-

-= Weather conditions: Mostly clear skies. =-

I left home at 0700, and arrived roughly 3 hours later aboard the vessel. A vessel with a sizeable crew. There was some paperwork and instructional videos to get through, but once that was over, it was time to get my hands dirty.

Spent the remainder of my shift assisting others on deck whilst trying to form a mental map of the vessel along with asking around for info about the ship and the type of work that she's made for. More on that later.

For now, my shift is over and I've got 12 hours completely to myself. We've just slipped our moorings and are underway to the North Sea proper.

-= Day 2 =-

-= Time of writing: 1010 the following day. =-

-= Weather conditions: Warm and sunny. =-

Not much to comment on for day two, as the whole day was spent cleaning the decks, starting from the bridge deck, down to the forward deck and finishing off on the main deck. Still more to do the next day.

-= Day 3 =-

-= Time of writing: 2100 =-

-= Weather conditions: Clear during the day, more cloud cover towards the evening. =-

More deckwashing today, plus some extra familiarization. Couple of meetings too, especially in regards to the job of decommissioning an offshore installation. We're now at anchor at the location and we'll stay here for two to three weeks as we take it apart.

Looking forward to seeing how this'll go, as it's the first time I'm involved in work of this sort.

So far I can say that I like the ship, as well as the folks aboard. Friendly colleagues, for one, and the ship is quite luxurious all things considered.

-= Day 4 =-

-= Time of writing: 1932 the next day. =-

-= Weather conditions: Clear skies most of the day. =-

Well, this log entry slipped my mind for a few.

The day was mostly spent keeping watch over the gangway connecting the ship to the platform, including keeping an eye on who goes off onto it.

Aside from that, there are some other odd jobs on the aft deck, mostly involving hoisting, lifting and the preparation for the materials to be hoisted.

I did, however, injure myself on something, but I'll be alright as it's nothing major. At most it's annoying in that it makes working with heavy gear a bit more difficult.

Should pass, given some time.

-= Day 5 =-

-= Time of writing: 1938 =-

-= Weather conditions: Rain and wind in the morning, sunny in the afternoon. =-

Immediate follow up on the last entry; I got my injury checked out by the onboard medic. It's nothing major, but still painful. Been described some pain meds and with those it's a bit better.

Other than that, I've been up the platform myself today, to help out with things, such as cleaning the heli deck, lashing loose objects in order to secure the first part of the rig for lifting and taking down materiel from the rig by crane.

Not much else to report at this time.

-= Day 6 =-

-= Time of writing: 1949 =-

-= Weather conditions: Sunny in the morning, shifting to rain, string winds and high waves over the course of the afternoon. =-

Welp. I overworked myself this morning and had to pay the ship's medic another visit. No change in the situation with my injury (bruised ribs), but in order for it to heal properly, I'm relegated to light duties only. Right now that means gangway watch. No heavy lifting, hauling, pulling or what have you.

So, that's what I'm doing from now on.

As for the project, the first third of the rig has been removed and put on a barge, and cutting of the second section has been nearly completed. All that remains is to remove that, followed up by the underwater section.

We also managed to dredge up some scrap that was lying on the seafloor. To which quite a lot of sea life was clinging onto. From anemones to seasponges, starfish and crabs.

No doubt we'll see a lot more when the final section of the rig is lifted up from the seafloor.

-= Day 7 =-

-= Time of writing: 1927 =-

-= Weather conditions: Sunny all day with a slight wind. =-

More gangway watch, plus some small tasks here and there as needed. The usual.

My ribs still hurt immensely in the morning, but the painkillers do help.

Other than that, two-thirds of the rig has been cut loose and hoisted up during my shift.

Now, all that remains is the underwater portion, which will take a significantly longer time to complete.

But with that said, the first quarter of my contract is over now. And with that, this log will go up.

P.S: I can't show pictures of the job in question yet, as I need to ask permission for that first. But some beauty shots I can use for the next log.

✨️May Polaris guide you always.✨️

[bookaddict24-7]

REVIEWS OF THE WEEK!

Every week I will post various reviews I've written so far in 2024. You can check out my Goodreads for more up-to-date reviews HERE.

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223. The Departure by K.A. Applegate--⭐️⭐️

The MC of this book being the only Black character in this series is both inspiring (especially because of when these books were first published), and a little sad because she's the most frustrating.

It is pretty well-known that Applegate's series is anti-war, which is great in itself, especially when considering that these are kids with some pretty great moral mentalities. But this MC is, in my opinion, the most self-aware character of the group. I think this because she is the one who is always reminding everyone that there are solutions that don't involve killing or hurting others. These are VERY important messages for readers--no matter the generation. My biggest complaint with this, however, is that sometimes all the moral questions and nay-saying can be over-the-top.

Which leads me to some of the questionable choices made in this book. Whenever a book is in this MC's POV, things can get either a bit frustrating, or just plain annoying. I'm sure many love her and the way she is, but I wish I could just fully explore why she does the things she does.

I just wish I could enjoy her POV more.

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224. All the Beauty in the World by Patrick Bringley--⭐️⭐️⭐️

I'm torn on ALL THE BEAUTY IN THE WORLD. On one hand, it had some seriously gorgeous moments (see, favourite quote from the book: Daughters who looked like their mothers' pasts, and fathers who look like their sons' futures." UGH this quote. I am in AWE.) But it also had moments where I seriously questioned why I continued reading.

I had this discussion with a coworker recently (the one who mentioned the book to me, actually) about how it wasn't at all what she was expecting. While I didn't have the same expectations as her, I DID have something else in mind. I didn't expect the essays to be a little heavier on the historical aspect of things and less about the stories of every day security work. All of the people watching could have and should have led to some more exciting or intriguing essays.

What I WILL say, however, is that Bringley explored the difficult journey of grief beautifully. I teared up a few times, especially when he was detailing his brother's last moments before his death. The emotion surrounding Bringley's grief was palpable. I could feel that pain jumping from the page.

While I wished I DNF'ed it various times, something about ALL THE BEAUTY IN THE WORLD kept me reading. Maybe it was that underlying sense of grief I could feel from the beginning, or the fact that some of the writing was admittedly beautiful. I just wish it was more engaging. Most of the essays dragged and I'd catch my attention slipping away.

If you like history thrown into your essays and a wonderfully heartbreaking exploration of growth and grief, then I think you'll like this one.

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225. Behind You by Catherine Hernandez--⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

Catherine Hernandez never misses.

I've read most of Hernandez's books (I think I still have just one left) and I'm not being facetious when I say that all have been mind-blowing reads. Every single one of her books has left me with heavy thoughts and a new perspective on society and the way I interact with it.

BEHIND YOU explores what it means to be not just a girl in society, but a foreign girl in society. The sexualizing of young non-white girls by adult men (who feel like they're owed something from said girls), and the bullying those same girls get from classmates who don't look like them. Adding in that this mostly takes place in Scarborough was an extra touch because of the diversity there.

There are some seriously creepy moments in this book that help exemplify what it means to exist in a young girl's body; what it looks like to not be believed when you mention a situation to someone you hope would be on your side. All with the extra terrifying mystery of a serial rapist/murderer, who I immediately connected to the Barbie & Ken murders.

Taking place both in the late 80s-early 90s, and in present-day Ontario, Hernandez's novel was also an ode to young girls who are just trying to find themselves in a world that is determined to keep them down. From a very verbally and at-times physically abusive household (that I presume heavily discriminated against the MC because of colourism), to a present where the adult MC is spiralling into a dark hell of trauma, triggered by a re-exploration of the case that haunted her childhood, Hernandez gives us an incredibly fleshed out story that refuses to miss out any details.

The parallels between the MC's past experiences, and the present struggle she encounters with her own son, wife, and still abusive family, and the past that still haunts her were incredible--especially when we see certain interactions between the MC and her wife regarding their son's behaviour.

Hernandez doesn't hold back any punches and I think anyone who can handle those punches should pick this book up. It's important, poignant, jarring, and just an absolutely incredible piece of Canadian literature.

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226. Clueless Puckboy by Saxon James & Eden Finley--⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

Probably my least favourite one of the series, tbh. But still cute!

I think the main reason why I wasn't as big a fan of this one was because of the miscommunication trope, which I never thought I'd see in this series.

But other than that, this was still as fun as the other books--especially watching the one MC win over the other. The whole "forbidden" aspect of their romance was one of the things that made this one so much fun.

I did feel bad for the hockey MC because of how insecure he was about his career, even though he is a professional hockey player. His character growth was nice to watch because he was probably one of the tamer players of the whole series. He wasn't cocky or someone who flaunted his good looks, he was just a nervous ball of insecurity. Also, I'm so glad he got his story--I'd been waiting for it since we were introduced to him in book one.

I won't lie, of all the books in the series, this one took me the longest to remember what it was about. My non-five star rating for this one makes a lot of sense now.

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227. The Dixon Rule by Elle Kennedy--⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

I was not expecting to cry as much as I did. Thanks Elle Kennedy.

I was excited to pick up THE DIXON RULE because I LOVED the previous one in this sequel series. I love how spicy these books get, but I especially love the emotional connection between the characters. And while this book definitely had that enemies to friends to lovers aspect that I love and that spicy tension between the two MCs, I found this one a LITTLE hard to fall for.

Book one had this great enemies aspect that had me rooting for both characters, but it took me a while to fall for the FMC. She was such a bitch to the MMC from the get-go. Like, I get that he was a hoe, but she just immediately thought the worst of him? To the point where it verged on bullying, especially with some of the antics regarding the other people who lived in their condominium. The important thing is that they finally communicated and a lot more made sense for the two of them.

THE DIXON RULE also explored some more darker aspects tentatively introduced in book one. Super trigger warning for stalking and physical abuse. Those scenes were hard to read, I can't even imagine someone who could be triggered by it. I don't think I've read a Kennedy book that had the very dark side of romance (and not in that "sexy dark romance" way.)

Also, bring tissues, because damn. This book.

By the end, I was a fan of these two characters together--especially because of how they took care of each other, how they showed each other love, and just how much understanding there was between the two of them.

I'm wary of the third book, but it has already been ordered LOL.

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228. Bromantic Puck Boy by Saxon James & Eden Finley--⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

Pleaseeeee. This was so much fun and so cute. Watching these two idiots figure themselves out was adorable af.

When I saw who this book was going to be about, I giggled so hard--especially because of how the one MC talked about the second MC in the last book. I knew it was coming, but I was still thoroughly entertained.

I know a lot of people didn't like how this one wasn't as outright romantic as the other books in the series, but I actually really liked this one because it was so different. I also liked how these two became inseparable best friends first before they fell into this messy friends-with-benefits situation.

In fact, while yes the spice was spicy, it was their relationship that really drew me in. The way the one character hated others using the same nickname his love interest called him, or how they did the most extreme or silliest things for each other. I loved it all. I literally read a story about two best friends falling in love when they didn't even realize they were doing exactly that.

I also really appreciated the topic of parents who may or may not be accepting, because it showed us (the readers) how that anxiety can grow so much to the point where you either ignore who you are or you pretend you're not the way you are, which can be extremely painful. It was a very vulnerable moment.

And BROMANTIC PUCKBOY also reminded me that I need to read FRAT WARS by Saxon James since a bunch of characters are mentioned in this one!

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229. The Jock by Tal Bauer--⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

Tal Bauer is an incredible author. He somehow always captures the deep romance of a story and then manages to rip your heart out of your chest.

I'll admit that I was a bit skeptical of THE JOCK at first because of that prologue. I think this book didn't need it and if anything, it made me almost not want to pick it up. But I'm grateful that I pushed through it because this love story was incredible.

The heartbreak in this is palpable and the way the characters live through made me want to sob. The selflessness of the one MC was incredible, but the understanding of the other was inspiring. Another thing that I love about Bauer's writing is how he can create these characters who jump of the pages to profess their love for one another. He's just so...romantic? It's incredible.

I appreciated, too, how the football MC was being realistic about his future and what he wanted. He was always questioning everything and trying to find a way to attain that future he wanted so badly. Although, I think that coach needs to kick a few rocks for putting that pressure on him.

The other MC has his own complex circumstances with family and his heartbreak, but the way he was there for the man he loves? Incredible. He was also great because he knew what he wanted for his future and he also fought for it. I liked that these two characters didn't fall completely into each other to the point where they lost sight of who they were (this is why I keep mentioning this aspect of the story).

There were some pretty heavy things that happen in this book, some triggering, and some anger-inducing. But THE JOCK is definitely a must-read for anyone who is just a huge romantic and a fan of sports romances!

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230. Verona Comics by Jennifer Dugan--⭐️⭐️.5

I don't know what I was expecting from VERONA COMICS, but it wasn't this. I think this is my first Jennifer Dugan book and I've always been curious about her stuff, especially because she always has such great covers.

I originally wanted to read this book because of the Bi rep, so that part was cool. I understood the MC's internal questioning regarding her identity and how she's dated only guys, even though she has had crushes on other girls. What I didn't understand was the Bi-phobia coming from her Lesbian best friend and how it wasn't really explored or commented on? In fact, her best friend being not the greatest friend in general was never really addressed.

While VERONA COMICS had the important topic of co-dependent relationships and the dangers of said relationships, I also think that it is a dangerous topic to not handle with care. Especially when young readers pick these books up. The way the relationship is treated at the end of the book is slightly troubling for me. It's good to get the mental health care needed, but that whole "let's give this a happy ending" aspect of it weirded me out.

There are also a plethora of other topics that were thrown at the reader that at times felt overwhelming and heartbreaking: emotional and verbal parental abuse, suicidal ideation, depression, and anxiety. This book was DARK and you know, this is fine. There are some seriously dark YA novels out there. My issue with this, though, is that this novel does not give any hint that this is one of those books that take you on a very serious mental health ride down a dark pit.

I kept reading because I couldn't look away, but the book now sits on my unhaul book stack. I can understand what the book was trying to say, but it was A LOT.

I didn't give this lower because even though the darkness of the story was overwhelming, there were moments of brightness and some cute moments between the characters. Also, half a star for the one friend who didn't try to manage the FMC's life. I get that the one friend was protective because of the FMC's shitty treatment of her friends when in a relationship, but her attitude was so bad that I will admit I thought she had a thing for the FMC.

I just wish this was just the cute book the cover hinted at, but knowing that this is a Romeo & Juliet adaptation should have hinted at how dark this was gonna get.

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231. This Summer Will Be Different by Carley Fortune--⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

Ah, I finally understand the hype for Carley Fortune.

When I read the first book by this author, I was underwhelmed. Not only did it have a really shitty twist, it felt like three different books that were already written made into one. Needless to say, I wasn't super impressed.

But THIS SUMMER WILL BE DIFFERENT? Yes, please. This was such a great and emotionally fuelled read. I could feel the tension between the MC and the love interest; I could feel the history between them. I wanted them together, but I knew they both had some serious hurdles to get over.

I actually enjoyed the back and forth of the past and present because it helped me further understand these two characters and why they are the way they are, especially when they're interacting with one another.

I think I was expecting something cheesy, or a really horrible twist, but what I got was actually a fantastic summer read that makes me really want to visit PEI.

After reading this book, I was curious about others' thoughts. I read one of my friend's reviews and she mentioned the weirdness of friendships and how extreme they can be and I have to say that I agree. Half of the tension in this book wouldn't be so...tense if the best friend didn't set such a rule from the first summer that the MC meets her love interest. It was a great point and now I'm sure I'll be thinking about it with every romance book I read. The friendship in this book is sudden and intense, but I won't fault it because it gave us this love story.

Loved the ending, loved the obsession with flowers, loved the missed opportunities and surprisingly spicy bits--I just loved how this felt like such a call to summer (which I know sounds weird, but it's how it felt).

Also, I'm a fan of the MC's character growth and her figuring out that in an attempt to find herself, she should probably stop being a workaholic and worrying what her parents think of her career choices.

Anyway, I highly recommend this book. It was fun, sexy, and incredibly addicting.

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Have you read any of these books? What were your thoughts?

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Happy reading!