#warrior x susannah

[biggsodorcitystories]

Zebedee and the Daughter's New Boyfriend

Or,

Warrior and the New Girlfriend's Father

A drawing I messed up and will not finish, but the idea was fun enough to share.

Secretly, Zebedee thinks his daughter couldn't have made a better choice, as Warrior would never judge her for being half engine. But he's not going to let Warrior know that - a father has standards to maintain, after all.

[ltwilliammowett]

Hannah Snell “The Woman in Men's Cloaths”

Hannah Snell was born on 23 April 1723 in Worcester, England. She moved to London in 1740 and married James Summes, a Dutch Sailor, on 6 January 1744. Two years later their daughter Susannah was born and died after only one year. Her husband had left her while she was still pregnant and now without husband and child she saw no other way out than to look for him.

Hannah Snell, a woman who passed as a soldier. Mezzotint by J. Young, 1789, after R. Phelps. (x)

She borrowed men's clothes from her brother-in-law James Gray and used his name. According to her account, following the death of her daughter, on 23 November 1745, she joined John Guise's regiment, the 6th Regiment of Foot, in the army of the Duke of Cumberland against Bonnie Prince Charlie. She deserted when her sergeant gave her 500 lashes and moved to Portsmouth and joined the Marines. At this point it was not true, because the events and dates she gave, as well as the chronologies of her life, make it unlikely that she served under John Guise.

Rather, after the death of her daughter, she went to Portmouth to look for him and learned that he had been executed for murder. What motivated her to join the Marines is not clear. Some historians suggest that she had hoped to find him at sea or at a naval base and joined the Marines before learning of his death. What is certain, however, is that she boarded HMS Swallow on 23 October 1747 and sailed for Lisbon on 1 November of the same year. In August 1748, her unit was sent on an expedition to capture the French colony of Pondicherry in India. She later also took part in the Battle of Devicotta in June 1749. She was wounded eleven times in the legs and once in the groin. She either managed to treat her groin wound without revealing her sex, or she enlisted the services of a compassionate Indian nurse.

(x)

In 1750, her unit returned to Britain and travelled from Portsmouth to London, where she revealed her gender to her shipmates on 2 June. She asked the Duke of Cumberland, the commander-in-chief of the army, for her pension. She was then honourably discharged and, because of her good service, was promised a pension in November 1750. Hoping for the pension but uncertain that she would receive it, she sold her story in June to Robert Walker, a publisher in London, who published it in two different editions. 

Hannah Snell, a woman who passed as a male soldier. Wood engraving, 1750. (x)

Curious about who this woman was, more and more people wanted to see her and so she appeared in public and in theatres in her uniform and told of her adventures, showed her fighting skills and sang marching songs. Three painters painted portraits of her in her uniform and The Gentleman's Magazine also covered her story in July.

Hannah showing her skills (x)

After her pension was approved Hannah retired to Wapping and began running a pub called The Female Warrior or The Widow in Masquerade - sources disagree on this - but it did not last long. She then moved to Newbury in Berkshire in the mid-1750s. In 1759 she married a second time to a man called Richard Eyles, with whom she had two children. And in 1772 she married a third time to a man called Richard Habgood from Welford, also in Berkshire, and they moved to the Midlands. In 1785 she was living with her son George Spence Eyles, a clerk, in Church Street, Stoke Newington, but in that year her pension was withdrawn.

One edition of Hannah’s Story, published by Rober Walker 1750 (x)

She appeared to be suffering from Alzheimer's disease and her health deteriorated gradually but not dramatically. This suddenly changed in 1791. she was admitted to Bethlem Hospital on 20 August and died on 8 February 1792. she was then buried in Chelsea Hospital, which had already been a hospital and let's call it an old people's home for veterans of the British army and also functioned like the Royal Navy Hospital in greenwhich is now even an old people's and nursing home.

[ramrodd]

#1 Tip For Understanding the Bible

COMMENTARY:

The best explanation of the Gospel of Mark, from the perspective of Cornelius, the centurion in Acts X is to connect the literature to Handel’s Messiah. .

(Cf: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iG5NoRo337I)

As a post-modern deconstruction, the Bible is a compact library of a Homeric epic identical to The Iliad and the Odyssey that arrives at exactly the same moment in the narrative when everything that came before is compressed into a singular event horizon of personal defeat in the Gospels.

When first we meet Odysseus, he is weeping. His troops have been transformed into pigs and he is captive to a Dominatrix and he just yearns for home, hearth and faithful Penelope, the Mary Magdalene of Homer, except she has Telemachus, a warrior's wife, Uriah's wife. Only, of course, Odysseus comes home and kicks ass with Telemachus in a “My Boy Friend's Back” kind of way.

The thing is, before we meet Odysseus weeping, everything is all about what a stud muffin he is, starting with the Gods. The movement of the narrative begins globally and comes to a focus locally when we meet a weeping Odysseus and, at the moment, the movement of the narrative pivots around this singularity and begins expand until the Homeric ethic is fulfilled in Ithaca.

The narrative of the Protestant Bible begins globally at the Big Bang of Genesis 1:1 and is apparently still expanding beyond our horizons in the universe, and then begins to re-compress, culturally, and focus on the coming Messiah, Jesus, until the Law of Moses runs out of steam for 500 years or so until the Roman legions could fulfill Daniel in time and for Jesus of Nazareth to free Jesus Barabas to light the fuse of the insurgency leading  to the Apocalypse in 70 AD/CE.

But the moment when we meet Jesus weeping  in John 11:35 and the entire narrative of what has come before pivots around this moment and, for the singularity of Resurrection to occur, Jesus must go through some serious shit. That's why He weeps: the Holy Ghost has just told Him that it was time to pay the piper. Jesus learns from Martha and Mary that He lost the bet He made with The Satan in the Wilderness as a continuation of  Job. That's getting ahead of the my version of the Bible, The Gospel of Mark according to Willie and Joe.

The best explanation of Christianity is the Gospel of Mark and the best explanation of the Gospel of Mark is Handel's Messiah. It's summed up in 2 hours and change. But in the Gospel of Mark according to willie and Joe, you need to be able to see Jesus from the point of view of a Roman Gideon as a person like Caine in the 70s series Kung Fu.

If you compare the opening of The Gospel of Mark with Lao Tzu, you'll see what I mean, The Prince of Peace is a warrior-king, like David, but without all the Sport Fucking being king lets David get away with. In fact, it is an obligation of Oriental Royalty to dedicate a great deal of time in sowing wild oats.

So, anyway, Jesus is a master of the martial arts. He trains His disciples in those skills when he sends them out without staff and/or with a sword more like a machete than a gladius and really more like one of those chef's knifes they use to carve lamb for a gyro. Peter cuts off Malduch's ear in Gethsemane with one. That's a pretty accurate warning shot, as they say.  

Jesus knows what's coming. He's volunteered for the mission of promoting God the Father as a loving God and all the rest. He bet The Satan He could do it intellectually and The Satan He can only do it with three magic tricks: feed the masses, create a global political structure and perform a death defying stunt.

Jesus lost the bet, That's what the significance of raising Lazarus represents: a death-defying stunt. Not a near death resuscitation, but a Pet Semetery moment. The Holy Ghost tells Jesus through Martha and Mary that He has a choice to mourn Lazarus and avoid the cup or raise Lazarus up even though he stinketh.

A death defying stunt. He lost the bet and Socrates' cup awaits. And all the tension He has been under since He was baptized is released and produces the shortest verse in the Bible: “Jesus wept”.

But, you said this is an explanation of the Gospel of Mark, not John.

Did I say John 11:35?  John is a companion to the Gospel of Mark and harmonizes in particular in Chapter 6 of both Gospels with the feeding of the 5000 and Chapter 11 of both Gospels, Palm Sunday. John 11:16 – 43 happens between Mark 11:11 and Mark 11:12. The next thing He does is zap fig tree.  My sense is that the feeding of the 5000 occurs just before the Passover the year before the Passover of Mark 16. John Mark is witness to the feeding of the 5000 but not to the Triumphant Entry: he's with the women in Bethany mourning Lazarus and the moment the narrative of the Bible is turned on it's head.

Now, this is where the connection between the Passion of Jesus connects most most empathically for the Christian context with a little bit of history about He was despised. Handel re-wrote this part specifically to accommodate the range of Susannah Cibber, an accomplished actor and musical performer who had been in an abusive relationship with another actor who pimped her as his wife to pay his debts and then been further victimized by a legal system that amplified the cultural penalty for being a woman by declaring her an unfit mother and taking away her children. She happened to be destitute from the notoriety and in Dublin when she ran into Handel, Handel loved the way could project emotion into her singing and featured her in his make or break staging of Messiah. At the end of her performance, the Archbishop stood and declared her redeemed of her sins.

Your job, as someone who claims they want to understand the Bible: first, embrace your own core of rot. It's what I mean to calibrate your Pucker Factor: what, for you, is the difference between “fear” and “fear of the Lord”?   How does Caine deal with fear? How do the Gideon's deal with fear?  How did Jesus deal with fear?

And fear is easy to deal with. How do you deal with  humiliation? The thing to understand about the Passion of Christ is that it was really just a routine execution of a Hebrew as a usual suspect in a the only good Zealot being a dead Zealot kind of way. For a soldier, the choice between getting killed and committing suicide is a pretty blurry line, especially when it comes to becoming a POW. And He was despised was written about the experience of being a prisoner in an enemy camp.

And sung by a women in a culture where women were captive in an enemy camp. And there is a direct connection between that and the moment at the edge of the event horizon of Resurrection when all the shit of the Cosmos that began flowing downhill with Genesis 1:1 hits bottom on top of Jesus.

Messiah is the best explanation for the literature of the Bible. At John 11:35, the world turns upside down and awaits lift off. If John McCain had known that morning what the next 7 years was going to be like, would he have strapped on his SkyHawk?  He had a similar moment as John 11:35 when he was offered the opportunity to leave the Hanoi Hilton early. I told McCain a difference between me and him is I would have left. As a Vietnam vet, I know what it means to be despised. I know what Tulsi Gabbard is going through.

Matt is absolutely wrong when he says we don't live in the world of Jesus.

Messiah will give you an existential context for the literature of the Bible: He was despised will give you an experiential anchor for that context. If you want to know what Jesus went through, meditate upon He was despised like Caine in the Wilderness.

Understanding Christianity will take care of itself.

[ramajmedia]

Screen Rant's Fall 2019 TV Premiere Dates | Screen Rant

Although TV is a year-round dumping ground for content these days, the promise of new and returning shows in the fall is still reason enough to get excited.  For one thing, the broadcast networks are sticking with their tried-and-true model of pushing big new premieres around this time of year, and 2019 is no different. ABC, CBS, FOX, NBC, and The CW all have a variety of new series set to make it or break it in the increasingly competitive Peak TV arena. And while the return and expansion of the Arrowverse, as well as new shows like CBS' anticipated Evil, and the fourth and final season of NBC's The Good Place all make a solid case for traditional TV continuing its ways, fall 2019 also brings two new streaming services to the table: Disney+ and Apple TV+.

While Apple TV+'s slate looks interesting and will certainly garner plenty of attention with titles like The Morning Show, For All Mankind, and Dickinson, it's the arrival of Disney's pop culture juggernaut, armed with a litany of Marvel and Star Wars titles (oh, and High School Musical) that's bound to set the internet on fire. To that end, other streaming services like Netflix, Amazon Prime, and Hulu (though the latter is technically now an offshoot of Disney+) will need to step up their respective game to continue earning those subscription dollars.

More:

As such, the Fall 2019 TV premiere is going to be more crowded and more competitive than in years past. While it remains to be seen how many new subscribers both services will have on launch day, it stands to reason Apple and Disney will be stealing the limelight for much of November. Until then, check out the premiere dates for the new and returning shows this fall:

Monday, September 2

Untouchable — Hulu

Tuesday, September 3

Mayans M.C. — FX, 10pm

Wednesday, September 4

Wu-Tang: An American Saga — Hulu

Dog’s Most Wanted — WGN America, 8pm

Friday, September 6

Elite — Netflix

The Spy — Netflix

Titans — DC Universe

Monday, September 9

The Deuce — HBO, 9pm

Tuesday, September 10

Mr. Mercedes — Audience Network, 10pm 

Thursday, September 12

The I-Land — Netflix

Mr. Inbetween — FX, 10pm

Midnight: This Close — Sundance, 10pm

Friday, September 13

Undone — Amazon

TOP PICK: Unbelievable — Netflix

Inspired by the real events in The Marshall Project and ProPublica Pulitzer Prize-winning article, "An Unbelievable Story of Rape," written by T. Christian Miller and Ken Armstrong, and the This American Life radio episode, “Anatomy of Doubt”, with episodes directed by Oscar nominees Susannah Grant and Lisa Cholodenko, "Unbelievable" is a story of unspeakable trauma, unwavering tenacity, and astounding resilience.

The Ranch — Netflix

Red Bull Peaking — The CW, 9pm

Room 104 — HBO, 11pm

Sunday, September 15

Country Music — PBS

Wednesday, September 18

American Horror Story: 1984 — FX, 10pm

Friday, September 20

Disenchantment — Netflix

Criminal — Netflix 

Inside Bill’s Brain — Netflix

Sunday, September 22

71st Primetime Emmy Awards — FOX, 8pm ET/ 5pm PT

Monday, September 23

Team Kaylie — Netflix

The Neighborhood — CBS, 8pm

The Voice — NBC, 8pm

9-1-1 — FOX, 8pm 

Bob Hearts Abishola — CBS, 8:30pm

All Rise — CBS, 9pm

Prodigal Son — FOX, 9pm

Bull — CBS, 10pm

Bluff City Law — NBC, 10pm

The Good Doctor — ABC, 10pm

Tuesday, September 24

NCIS — CBS, 8pm

The Resident — FOX, 8pm

The Conners — ABC, 8pm

Bless This Mess — ABC, 8:30pm

FBI — CBS, 9pm

This Is Us — NBC, 9pm

Empire — FOX, 9pm

Mixed-ish — ABC, 9pm

Black-ish — ABC, 9:30pm

NCIS: New Orleans — CBS, 10pm

New Amsterdam — NBC, 10pm

Emergence — ABC, 10pm

Wednesday, September 25

Chicago Med — NBC, 8pm

The Masked Singer — FOX, 8pm

The Goldbergs — ABC, 8pm

Schooled — ABC, 8:30pm

Chicago Fire — NBC, 9pm

Modern Family — ABC, 9pm 

Single Parents — ABC, 9:30pm

Chicago P.D. — NBC, 10pm

It’s Always Sunny In Philadelphia — FXX, 10pm

Stumptown — ABC, 10pm

South Park — Comedy Central, 10pm

Crank Yankers — Comedy Central, 10:30pm

Thursday, September 26

Top Pick: Creepshow — Shudder

Based on the iconic 1982 film written by Stephen King and directed by George A. Romero, Creepshow stars David Arquette (Scream franchise), Adrienne Barbeau, Tobin Bell (Saw), Big Boi (Scream: The TV Series), Jeffrey Combs (Star Trek, Re-Animator), Kid Cudi (Drunk Parents), Bruce Davison (Longtime Companion, X-Men), Giancarlo Esposito (Better Call Saul), Dana Gould (The Simpsons, Stan Against Evil), Tricia Helfer (Battlestar Galactica, Lucifer) and DJ Qualls (The Man in the High Castle, Supernatural).

Young Sheldon — CBS, 8pm

Superstore — NBC, 8pm

Grey’s Anatomy — ABC, 8pm

The Unicorn — CBS, 8:30pm

Perfect Harmony — NBC, 8:30pm

Mom — CBS, 9pm

The Good Place — NBC, 9pm

A Million Little Things — ABC, 9pm

Carol’s Second Act — CBS, 9:30pm

Sunnyside — NBC, 9:30pm

Top Pick: Evil — CBS, 10pm

EVIL is a psychological mystery that examines the origins of evil along the dividing line between science and religion. The series focuses on a skeptical female psychologist who joins a priest-in-training and a carpenter as they investigate the Church’s backlog of unexplained mysteries, including supposed miracles, demonic possessions and hauntings. Their job is to assess if there is a logical explanation or if something truly supernatural is at work.

Law & Order: SVU — NBC, 10pm

How To Get Away With Murder — ABC, 10pm

Friday, September 27

The Politician — Netflix

Transparent — Amazon

Hawaii Five-0 — CBS, 8pm

American Housewife — ABC, 8pm, 

Fresh Off the Boat — ABC, 8:30pm

Magnum P.I. — CBS, 9pm

Blue Bloods — CBS, 10pm

Van Helsing — SYFY, 10pm

Sunday, September 29

America’s Funniest Home Videos — ABC, 7pm

The Simpsons — FOX, 8pm

God Friended Me — CBS, 8:30pm

Bless The Harts — FOX, 8:30pm

Bob’s  Burgers — FOX 9pm

Shark Tank — ABC, 9pm

Poldark — PBS, 9pm

NCIS: Los Angeles — CBS, 9:30pm

Family Guy — FOX, 9:30pm

The Rookie — ABC, 10pm

Robot Chicken — Adult Swim, 12pm

Next: October 2019 - Peaky Blinders, Raising Dion & More

Tuesday, October 1

Sorry For Your Loss —Facebook Watch

Wednesday, October 2

All Elite Wrestling — TNT, 8pm

SEAL Team — CBS, 9pm

Almost Family — FOX, 9pm

SWAT — CBS, 10pm

Friday, October 4

Big Mouth — Netflix

Peaky Blinders — Netflix

Top Pick: Raising Dion — Netflix 

Raising Dion follows the story of a woman named Nicole (Alisha Wainwright), who raises her son Dion (newcomer Ja’Siah Young) after the death of her husband, Mark (Michael B. Jordan). The normal dramas of raising a son as a single mom are amplified when Dion starts to manifest several mysterious, superhero-like abilities. Nicole must now keep her son’s gifts secret with the help of Mark’s best friend Pat (Jason Ritter), and protect Dion from antagonists out to exploit him while figuring out the origin of his abilities.

The Blacklist — NBC, 8pm

WWE Smackdown — FOX, 8pm

Sunday, October 6

Batwoman — The CW, 8pm

Back to Life — Showtime, 8:30pm

Supergirl — The CW, 9pm

The Walking Dead — AMC, 9pm

Madam Secretary — CBS, 10pm

Star Wars Resistance — Disney Channel, 10pm

Mr. Robot — USA, 10pm

Monday, October 7

All American — The CW, 8pm

Black Lightning — The CW, 9pm

Tuesday, October 8

The Flash — The CW, 8pm

Wednesday, October 9

Riverdale — The CW, 8pm

Nancy Drew — The CW, 9pm

Thursday, October 10

Supernatural — The CW, 8pm

Legacies — The CW, 9pm

Friday, October 11

Charmed — The CW, 8pm

Dynasty — The CW, 9pm

Tuesday, October 15

Arrow — The CW, 9pm

Wednesday, October 16

Limetown — Facebook Watch

Friday, October 18

Looking For Alaska — Hulu

Modern Love — Amazon

Living With Yourself — Netflix

Sunday, October 20

Leavenworth — Starz, 8pm

Tuesday, October 22

Misery Index — TBS, 10pm

Wednesday, October 23

The Cry — Sundance, 11pm

Friday, October 25

The Kominsky Method — Netflix

Sunday, October 27

Silicon Valley — HBO, 10pm

Mrs. Fletcher — HBO, 10:30pm

Next: November 2019 - Disney+, Apple TV+ & More

Apple TV+ (TBD)

Dickinson — Apple TV+ (TBD)

The Morning Show  — Apple TV+ (TBD)

For All Mankind — Apple TV+ (TBD)

Snoopy In Space — Apple TV+ (TBD)

Friday, November 1

American Son — Netflix

Sunday, November 3

Shameless — Showtime, 9pm

Kidding — Showtime, 10pm

Tuesday, November 12

Disney+ Launch Date

High School Musical — Disney+

Top Pick: The Mandalorian — Disney+

After the stories of Jango and Boba Fett, another warrior emerges in the Star Wars universe. The Mandalorian is set after the fall of the Empire and before the emergence of the First Order. We follow the travails of a lone gunfighter in the outer reaches of the galaxy far from the authority of the New Republic.

Friday, November 15

The Man in the High Castle — Amazon

Dollface — Hulu

Sunday, November 17

The Crown — Netflix

Ray Donovan — Showtime, 8pm

Sunday, November 24

Slow Burn — EPIX

Monday, November 25

College Behind Bars — PBS, 9pm

Next: December 2019 - The Expanse, Runaways & More

Friday, December 6

Reprisal — Hulu

The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel — Amazon

Sunday, December 8

The L Word: Generation Q — Showtime, 10pm

Work in Progress — Showtime, 11pm

Friday, December 13

The Expanse — Amazon

Runaways — Hulu

Next: Kingdom Of The White Wolf Interview: Ronan Donovan On Nat Geo WILD’s New Event Series

source https://screenrant.com/fall-2019-tv-premiere-dates-new-returning-shows/

[biggsodorcitystories]

Warrior's Missing Eagle Crest -A TUGS Fanfiction

I haven't written anything in an embarrassing amount of time, so this is probably a big pile of doo-doo, but I'm just so proud that this feels like a release of sorts so I had to share!

Fandom:Tugs

Rating: General

Genre: General, Family.

Characters (active): Hercules, Warrior, Susannah (OC)

Charcters (mentioned): Top Hat, Big Mac, Ten Cents, Sunshine, Captain Starr, Sea Rogue, Lillie, Zebedee, Aurora (OC), Silver Penny (OC), Grandma Starr (OC), Bright Dawn (OC), Andrew (OC)

Pairings: Warrior x Susannah, Hercules x Lillie, Big Mac x Top Hat, Bright Dawn x Sea Rogue.

Warnings: Humanised characters, Headcanon that Warrior is the brother of Hercules and Ten Cents, M/M pairing and references to Mpreg, CanonxOC ships, references to abandonment, depression, and angst.

Summary: Hercules accidentally comes across Warrior and Susannah deep in conversation on an evening walk, and hears Susannah ask why Warrior does not have an eagle crest like his brothers. Warrior's response is not what Hercules expected, forcing him to reflect on how his behaviour could have shaped Warrior's thoughts.

This route to Lowtown brought back a lot of memories as Hercules strolled along the path. It felt like another time – another world, even – when he had trotted along at the heels of his beloved aunt, Bright Dawn Starr, and her beau Patrick Teach – known to most as Sea Rogue. In a way, it had been both. His aunt and Sea Rogue had been in their late teens, barely into adulthood, while he had been little more than a toddler and still figuring out coherent speech. But he could still remember how much he had enjoyed the walks, clutching his auntie's hand and thinking up new ways to stop 'Uncle Patch' from holding the other one. Looking around, very little had changed along the riverbank path itself, but he couldn't remember enough about the area to consider how the environment had changed. It had been around twenty-five years since he'd last taken a walk this way.

He'd been twelve when they'd returned to the city, and Hercules had been far too busy in the past decade with supporting his grandfather to rebuild the Starr fleet and their reputation, and helping his mother to recover with the divorce from his father after he ran off with Auntie Dawn, with her raising his new baby brother, Ten Cents, and with...

“Warrior, can I ask you something?”

Hercules stopped in his tracks at the sound of the voice. He immediately recognised it as Susannah Moran – her Liverpudlian accent so like her father, Zebedee's, that it was fairly unique. To the surprise of many, she and Warrior had entered into a courtship that her father had not opposed. It seemed that he had stumbled across one of their dates.

They were sat by the river's edge, with their backs to him, deep in conversation. Part of him was screaming that he shouldn't be eavesdropping on them in this way, and he was about to make his presence known, when Warrior spoke.

“Course you can, Suse. What is it?”

Susannah seemed to be looking at something in front of her.

“How come yous don't have an eagle crest on your hat like your brothers? Don't yous have one?”

Hercules froze. That question had never been asked of him, nor of his brothers to his knowledge, but he knew that it had been whispered throughout the port ever since Ten Cents had received his crest two years before.

“Why is Warrior the 'odd one out' to his brothers..?”

He had an idea what the answer was, but to his shame realised that he'd never heard it from Warrior himself. Though he felt guilty, almost dirty, he kept quiet and listened for Warrior's response.

Warrior sighed, moving to take what Hercules assumed was his hat from Susannah.

“Oh, sure I got one.” He sighed. “Grandma gave us all one on our fifteenth birthday, like a coming of age thingy. She gave one to Aurora and Sunshine the first Christmas after we found out who they were.”

Susannah nodded with no hint of surprise. Hercules wasn't sure how he felt about that, given that it meant she knew more about their family history than he'd like, but was distracted as Warrior continued.

“I've got mine in the box it came in, on my bedside table.”

“Why don't you wear it?”

There was a pause before Warrior replied.

“I...I daren't, Suse. I don't wanna break it or lose it if I 'ave one of me accidents. It...it means too much to me.”

Hercules pulled a face and fought down an urge to scoff. The eagle crests Grandma Starr had given them were heavy, solid things that practically fused to his and Ten Cents' hats, so he wasn't entirely convinced by his brother's reasoning. Hell, Ten Cents had taken a fuel tanker explosion to the face, and his crest had suffered nothing worse than a bit of soot and smoke staining. Warrior's habit of bumping into and tripping over things was unlikely to cause it much harm, if any.

Susannah seemed to be following a similar line of thought.

“Doesn't it mean as much to Hercules and Ten Cents too?” Warrior looked away as he gave a bitter chuckle.

“I'm not sayin it don't...doesn't mean anythin to them. But...I don't think either of them ever saw it as I did when they got theirs.”

Susannah didn't reply, and she sat quietly until Warrior turned back to look at her.

“Yknow 'ow I told you about being fostered by Big Mac and Top 'At when we first moved back here?”

Susannah gave a nod, which Hercules wasn't entirely shocked by. Strangers to the port would frequently make the assumption that Warrior was the son of Big Mac and Top Hat, which annoyed him almost as much as the looks of surprise when they learned who his real family was. Hercules wished his younger brother wouldn't be so cheerful whenever he corrected someone, and in quiet moments he suspected that Big Mac and Top Hat secretly delighted in the mistake. He couldn't let go of the thought that the couple would like nothing more than to claim Warrior as their own child, as they probably would have done if his mother hadn't claimed Warrior back.

“Oh yeah?” Susannah continued. “Because your Mum needed the break while she was getting back on her feet?”

“Yeah. With my Dad runnin out on us, movin from London, and finding out she were pregnant again. It was a lot to 'andle...an I think I was making it a lot worse with the way I was acting.”

Hercules felt his brows raise at this last remark. He would have sworn that Warrior didn't remember that time.

“My Dad...I don't really remember 'im that well. I were only three when he left, but I do remember 'im lettin me get away with a lot. Then 'e was gone, and suddenly I wasn't allowed to do anythin' any more and kept gettin' into trouble. I do remember not taking it well and I was a little shit to everyone, especially my Mum...”

“You were three years old, Warrior. Three year olds don't behave at the best of times, and your whole world changed overnight.”

“I know, but...I was too much for Mum to 'andle at the time. Hercules tried to help with me, but he was...eleven or twelve? I reckon we both looked and sounded like screaming kids.”

Hercules found himself nodding in agreement as he looked away. No matter how much they wanted to, a pre-teen was no substitute for a parent, even if they weren't hurting from their own trauma as he had been. It was just one of many things he struggled with guilt over, regardless, unable to shake the feeling that he'd failed both his mother and Warrior.

“Mum ended up breaking down. Lucky that Top 'At were with her when she did, an 'e offered to 'ave me for a little while, until she were better. Hercules ended up stayin with our grandparents.”

“Why didn't they take yous too?”

“They offered, more than once. Thing is, Andrew was me best mate even then, an I reckon everyone thought it would do me good if I were close to someone my age instead of with Hercules. Mum kept comin to see me, anyway, tellin me about the new baby an 'ow I was gonna be a big brother an all. At first, it felt like a big sleepover – it was great. Not to mention, Big Mac and Top 'At were doin a lot to undo the behaviours Dad had taught me, though I didn't know at the time. I don't like to think about what I'd have turned out like if they'd not sorted me.

But when the weeks turned into months, and I spent most of Christmas with them instead of my own family...I remember starting to worry. I knew by then that I'd been...naughty while I was at home, and I wondered if I'd been sent away to live with my godparents because of it, like a punishment. I asked them when I was going home again, and they told me it was just until Mum 'ad the new baby.

It were enough for me for a while, even though I knew Hercules was back home, but he was older. I was happy to start – I got to spend every day with Andrew and I loved that. Mum was still coming to visit, and I went to see her and my grandparents, just came back with Big Mac and Top 'At. I reckon it were bothering me, deep down, but I could still treat it like a long sleepover, or an 'oliday and forget about it.”

He paused to give another heavy sigh.

“Then Ten Cents was born. Top 'At took me to see Mum and I got to hold 'im. I remembered being so excited an tellin Mum he could sleep in my room with me, which Mum smiled at and said he was too little to share my room. I went back thinking Mum would come and get me a few days later, but she didn't.

I still went to visit like I 'ad before, but there was no talk of me comin back.”

“Why didn't you ask to come home?”

For a second, Hercules thought that he'd spoken – the question had been echoing through his skull loud enough and he'd been getting more frustrated each time Warrior mentioned wanting to go home. He'd been asking the same questions while Warrior was away – if Warrior had just asked once, maybe their mother would have brought him back where he belonged sooner than she had. He half expected Warrior to hear and turn to see him, which would almost certainly result in another fight between them.

But Warrior's attention remained fixed on Susannah, the one who had actually asked the question. His response was so quiet that Hercules barely made out what he said.

“I was scared to, Suse. I didn't even want to go into my bedroom in case I saw it had been turned into Ten Cents' nursery and all my stuff was gone. I'd been getting' nightmares for weeks about Mum and Hercules tellin me that they didn't love me any more...”

He could hear the tears behind Warrior's voice as he ended the last sentence – as sure as he felt his own stinging his eyes. The frustration of a few seconds ago withered in the face of this new shame. Why was this a revelation to him? Warrior was talking about something that happened seventeen years ago – he should have known long before today that Warrior had felt like this and soothed said fears away.

But Warrior had never told him about them!

He looked up to see Susannah comforting Warrior, her head leaning on his shoulder. He saw his brother wipe his eyes.

“I'm alright.” He said softly, turning his head to kiss the top of her head. “Sorry about dat.”

“It's okay.” She replied. “You got back to your family though, and they didn't send yous away.”

“Yeah...that's a story in itself. When Ten Cents was born and I still didn't get to go home, staying with Big Mac and Top 'At wasn't so fun any more. They'd got me out of the tantrums and bratty stuff, and I knew dat if my real family didn't want me they were all I 'ad left, so I just cried myself to sleep a lot. I wasn't as quiet as I thought, as either they'd hear me or Drew would go down an tell em I was crying and they'd come up and comfort me. They tried their best, but I was sure I was staying with them forever. Then...”

Warrior paused for a second, as if trying to choose his words. Hercules was partly relieved for the respite – every word had felt like an accusing jab to the stomach – but he was fairly confident about where Warrior was going next.

“It turned out that I weren't the only one thinkin' I was stayin' with my foster parents forever. Top 'At an Big Mac have two kids older than Andrew – Joeseph an Heather. I dunno why, an if I'm bein really honest I think I'm best not knowin, but they decided I was stayin with them forever too. Heather decided to start bragging to Hercules about I was her brother now. Hercules got really angry and mouthed off at her. She got upset and Joe stood up for her, which might 'ave gone really badly if he wasn't an ocean-going tug as well.”

Hercules felt his teeth clench in anger, but not at his brother. Since that day, he and Joeseph had been unable to stay in the same room, let alone talk to one another, without it escalating to a fight. Joeseph had only been defending his little sister, but he didn't know why until Heather confessed to her teasing a year later. Her parents had been furious, but the damage had already been done...

“When we managed to break them apart, Mum an Top 'At went away an 'ad a very long talk. I was miserable, an sure dat was it for me. Mum an Hercules would never want me back after the fightin and Mum 'ad fell out with her best friend. But, later dat night Mum came over and said I was comin home the next day. I wanted to be 'appy, but I was frightened dat it was a punishment because of the fight.” He paused to sigh. “My room was still the same with all the stuff I'd left, an Mum helped me put my other things away. She gave me lots of hugs and said she was sorry she adn't brought me back sooner. My grandparents came over an made a fuss of me bein back – especially Grandma – an even Ten Cents seemed to like avin someone to play with. Hercules made a big show of bein glad I was back, but...”

'Made a “big show?!”' I was happy you were back home! Hercules wanted to scream at him, but forced himself to calm down when he heard Warrior speak in response to something Susannah had said.

“Well, it was the way he was with me later...it were like 'e thought I was only actin less spoiled and he was just waitin' for me to drop the act. Every little thing, he'd be there, either fixing what I was already doing or tellin me what to do. To start with, I thought he was tryin to 'elp an I wanted him to see how much better behaved I was now an make 'im proud. But...nothin' I did, nothin I said, were ever good enough for Hercules to stop watchin' me like I was gonna just go back to before. Everyone else seemed so happy with me, but the way Hercules kept treatin me made me worry dat he was the only one who wasn't hidin' the feelins they all 'ad. I felt like they were all waitin for me to make a mistake...so....so they could send me away for good...”

Hercules could barely think as he heard Warrior – his own brother – confess to feeling unwanted because of his behaviour. He wanted to deny it, insist it was just Warrior's imagination that made him believe those things. He even wanted to blame Big Mac and Top Hat, somehow poisoning Warrior's mind against them. It had been their son who Hercules had gotten into the fight with, and their daughter who had caused the fight with her tall tales, so maybe it was revenge against him to create a rift?

But for all his wants, he knew they would be lies. Not the wanting his brother back home, that had been true enough, but what Warrior had said about him watching for a return to form? To his shame, that was completely true.

He had resented his younger brother for automatically getting all his father's attention and favour, to the point that he'd been shocked that he'd not been taken by their father and Auntie Dawn when they left. In the weeks that followed, he'd seen their father's actions in everything Warrior had done, with every tantrum feeling like just another act of mockery from the man. He shouldn't have held his brother, who was barely more than a toddler, accountable, but he'd been twelve years old and full of pain. When Warrior had been sent to Big Mac and Top Hat, a tiny part of him had been relieved to be getting a break and having his grandparents' full attention. Maybe in some darker moments, in those early days of sorting his feelings, he'd entertained some private thoughts about how it might be better for Warrior to stay away. He'd caught them and buried them away, horrified by them. When Warrior had stayed away they had often danced back into his memories like an accusation. Once again, they were trying to resurface...

Because it had been so much easier if he treated Warrior like he needed to be constantly watched, to ignore his guilt by transferring it to his brother. It had been noticed too – his mother, grandparents, O.J, even Ten Cents had tried speaking to him about the way he treated Warrior. They'd never approached him, but Big Mac and Top Hat had often flashed disappointed glances in his direction when Warrior had fled to them after yet another argument. If they really did want to steal Warrior away, Hercules was doing them a huge favour.

“Yeah, I spent a lot of time with Big Mac an' Top At. Dey never made me feel like I 'ad to walk on eggshells, so I went over just for the peace. Even after they adoped Maggie, I was welcome any time. Mum and my grandparents would try an get me to stay 'ome more, an I'd try to, but it just got too much sometimes. Some days, I'd barely get through the door before it started...dat's one of the reasons I did the Fire Tug training, to get away from the fleet an do somethin different. The Fire Chief 'ad nothin but good things to say 'bout me, so Hercules couldn't pick at me about it.”

Hercules had been impressed with Warrior's dedication to becoming a certified Fire Tug – he'd been stupidly proud of how much the Fire Chief had praised Warrior.

But like many things, he'd never expressed these feelings out loud...

“When I were seven, Hercules turned fifteen and Grandma came in with this little box. She called 'im away for a minute, an' when they came back, 'e was holding the eagle crest. I remember thinkin it was the coolest thing I'd ever seen, and Ten Cents – 'e was three – was asking Grandma if 'e could have one like it. Grandma said we would both be getting' our own on our fifteenth birthdays, because it were a tradition. She specifically said I'd be getting mine first, because I were older and it was fair, but I became convinced dat she'd only said it to calm Ten Cents down and thought I'd forget. I was so sure as I got older that my fifteenth birthday would come an' dere wouldn't be a crest for me...right up until I opened the box and saw it.”

“What happened? Your gran must have seen you were surprised when she gave it to you.”

“I...burst into tears right in front of her – she was horrified!” Warrior chuckled. “She even looked in the box to make sure it was in dere before she gave me a hug. She's the only one in the family I ever told about 'ow I was feelin because I just blurted everythin out right in front of her. We spent so long away from everyone Mum came lookin for us. I'd calmed down by dat time an we were just getting ready to come back, so Mum didn't see me upset. I think Grandma must have said somethin afterwards, because suddenly Mum was giving me a lot of hugs – I think she might 'ave been hurt I didn't tell her myself. “

“What about Hercules?”

Nobody had said anything to Hercules, but after Warrior's fifteenth birthday, his grandparents had pulled him up about being so hard on Warrior a couple of times. He'd listened to them – or he'd thought he had – but it had never occurred to him to wonder why.

“I mean, things aren't as bad as they were between him an me, but...I still feel like Ten Cents is the only thing keepin us from arguing a lot of the time. I know he gets confused about it all, but I think he's decided it's better not to know. Besides, I reckon he's 'had a bit more to worry about after what nearly 'appened with Sunshine.”

Sunshine, and his twin sister Aurora, had both been given their own crests the previous Christmas. Their sister had fashioned hers into a pendant, and wore it out as a necklace more than as a crest, and Sunshine only wore his on special occsions, claiming the weight gave him a headache after a few hours. That had never bothered Hercules anywhere near as much as Warrrior not wearing his had, and he realised with a sudden shame that he knew how his other three siblings - two of whom he had only known about for little over a year – felt about their crests before now, but not Warrior.

“Warrior...” Hercules took a step back to hide behind a bush as Susannah turned to look at Warrior straight on. The last thing he needed was for her to spot him now, after he had eavesdropped on this conversation.

“I know it's not my place, but I think yous need to tell Hercules these things. I'd be horrified if any of my brothers or my sister felt this way about me, and...I think he would too, if he'd heard us talking.”

Warrior sighed, and hung his head.

“I reckon 'e would too, Suse. Things 'ave gotten a bit better since everything went down last year, cos I think Hercules realised 'e could actually talk to me a bit. We talked a lot about our father, but...I don't know if I can bring the conversation up without starting another argument and goin back to square one...”

Hercules backed away slowly, relieved to see that neither of them were making a move to get up, and turned to leave.

He had a lot to think about...