#warrior cat that says things like “thou” and thy“ and no one knows what the fuck hes talking about

[non-sequitur-ocs]

Drew my dumb idiot nightcrash, so so stupid, goes into starclan and immediately decides that clearly the point of starclan is to keep the evil of the dark forest at bay! every cat tells him wait no, and there he goes, charging into the dark forest to go defeat evil, at least he's having fun?

[we-shall-remain]

The Young King and the Golden Demon

Fifteen, he was fifteen when they made him king. His father, David, had grown old and was dying and he had named Solomon his heir, even though his son was neither the oldest nor the most experienced.

However, Solomon was wise and as he was crowned king, he understood why his father had wept and clung to Abishag in his final days.

The House of David was pulling itself apart at the seams.

Solomon's siblings were like jackals. Half of them wanted to assassinate him and the other half wanted to kiss up to him, each of them jockeying for position in the new order. Even Solomon's mother, Bathsheba, sat like a Persian cat upon a cushion, horribly smug and proud of herself for twisting David's heart to make her son king.

Solomon, young, wise Solomon, would try to do right by his father and become a king that upheld Israel and Judah. However, he decided early on that he needed help, someone he could trust that wasn't so self serving. Someone powerful.

For even in his extended family there was corruption, his uncles and cousins, everyone each out for themselves, and it both sickened and sadden the young man. Thus, he set out to make the change his father had wished for but couldn't, not with his waning strength.

So, the young mage king sat within his focus circle and triangle, his summoning circle etched in front of him as he stretched out his hand. He needed someone to be on his side, to protect him and all those he truly cared for, to give him advice when he thought himself in circles.

He needed a warrior, a servant, but most importantly, he needed a friend.

So he began, the circle, the triangle, the hexagram, pentagram, his ring, his vessel and his seal.

He spoke thus:

“Thee I invoke, the Bornless one.

Thee, that didst create the Earth and the Heavens,

Thee, that didst create the Night and the day.

Thee, that didst create the darkness and the Light.

Thou art Osorronophris,

Whom no man hath seen at any time.

Thou art Iabas,

Thou art Hipos,

Thou hast distinguished between the just and the unjust.

Thou didst make the female and the male.

Thou didst produce the seed and the fruit?

Thou didst form men to love one another, and to hate one another.

I am Solomon Thy Prophet, unto Whom Thou didst commit Thy Mysteries, the Ceremonies of Jahveh:

Thou didst produce the moist and the dry, and that which nourisheth all created Life.

Hear  Thou Me,  for  I  am  the  Angel of Apophrasz,  

Osor-Ronophris: this is Thy True Name, handed down to the Prophets of Israel and Judah

Hear Me, Thiao, Reibet Atheleberseth, Blatha, Abeu, Eben.

Phi, Chitasoe, Ib, Thiao.

Hear Me, and make all Spirits subject unto Me:

so that every Spirit of the  Firmament and of the Ether:

upon the Earth and under the Earth,

on dry Land and in the Water,

of Whirling Air, and of rushing Fire,

and every Spell and Scourge of God may be obedient unto Me.

I invoke Thee, the Terrible and Invisible God,

Who dwellest in the Void Place of the Spirit,

Arogogorobrao, Sochou, Modorio, Phalarchao,

The Bornless One: Hear Me

Hear Me Thahebyobeeatan, Auramoth, Roubriao, Mariodam, Tholeth, Abrasax, Balbnabaoth, Assalonai, Aphniao, Aeooii, Ischure, Mighty and Bornless One!

I  invoke Thee Thahaaotahe. Barraio, Ioel, Kotha, Athorebalo, Abraoth:

Hear me! Aoth, Abaoth, Basum, lsak, Sabaoth, Lao,

This is the Lord of the Gods,

This is the Lord of the Universe,

This is He Whom the Winds fear.

This is He, Who having made Voice by His Commandment, is Lord of All Things; King, Ruler and Helper.

I  am He! the Bornless Spirit!

Having sight in the Feet: Strong, and the Immortal Fire!

I  am He! the Truth!

I  am He! Who hate that evil should be wrought in the World!

I  am He, that lighteneth and thundereth.

I am He, from whom is the Shower of the Life of Earth:

I am He, whose mouth ever flameth:

I am He, the Begetter and Manifester unto the Light:

I  am He; the Grace of the World:

"The Heart Girt with a Serpent" is My Name!

Come Thou forth, and follow Me: and make all Spirits subject unto Me so that every Spirit of the Firmament, and of  the Ether:

upon the Earth and under the Earth:

on dry land, or in the Water:

of  whirling Air or of rushing Fire:

and every Spell and Scourge of  God, may be obedient unto me!  

Such are the Words!

Come! Goetia!”

As he spoke, his circle had begun to glow a bright crystalline light, growing brighter and brighter as something began to form in it's center; both liquid and light and golden. As he finished, calling forth the final name, it was as if the bubble of light and water popped, the shine dimming until what appeared to be a sunbeam hovered there, glowing in the quiet room.

It had no form, but Solomon knew when it looked at him and suddenly, it spoke into his mind; 72 different voices and thoughts and feelings bombarding the young mage with a single question.

“Who are you? Who are you? Who are you? who are You? who Are you? who are you? Who are you? Who are you? Who are you? Who are you? u? Who are-are you? whoYou? w Are you? u? Who are you? Who are you? who are You? who Are youu? Who are you? Who are you? who are You? who Are you?”

Solomon gasped and clammed his hands over his ears because it was to much, to many at once, he felt that he would go mad, tears filling his eyes from the sudden pain.

“Stop! Stop! Please, I call f-for silence! Please!”  

The voices stopped instantly, snuffed out like a candle flame. They were silent for a moment, watching, and then one voice came forth; a joined consciousness that the young mage could know them by. It was a gentle, young voice of a man, close to Solomon in age, curious and soft as a butterfly wing.

“Who are you, master?” Goetia asked.

Solomon sat up carefully from where he'd fallen instinctively, slowly lowering his hands from his ears at that single; beautiful voice.

“I am Solomon,” he replied, “Son of David, son of Jesse. I am... King of Israel and Judah.”

“King?” the voice came and Solomon could imagine the being tilting his head, “You are young for a king, although not the youngest we've seen. Why have you brought us to you, King Solomon?”

Solomon hesitated for a second, for he was speaking with demons, spirits, and they could be tricky at times and vicious at the worst times but, he had needed someone to trust so...

“As... as you say, I am young for a king,” he began, “My father just recently passed away and I... I am afraid. I need someone to rely on, someone I can trust to protect me and...”

“Do you wish for someone to love, young king Solomon?” Goetia asked, and Solomon blushed, a soft pink upon his cheeks as he averted his eyes although it was clear that the answer was yes.

“Very well,” the sunbeam said, “We have never been summoned all at once before, you are an exceptionally strong mage, but we shall do our best to create a form that is pleasing to your eyes. Be still, please.”

So the king watched as the sunlight form reflected and refracted, deciding on how it should look and what went where. Eventually, a young man of 15 years stood before Solomon, a man with long golden hair and tan skin, handsome and fine in face and body, with warm carmine colored eyes. He had all the necessary parts too; eyes, nose, mouth, neck and shoulders, arms, belly, legs and...

Solomon stared, his blush rising even pinker and hotter then before because Goetia was completely and utterly naked! The young king squeaked and clamped his hands over his eyes this time, incredibly embarrassed and Goetia tilted his head to the side, confused.

“What is wrong?” he asked, curious, “Does this form not please you?”

Solomon sputtered, his hands still over his eyes.

“No, no, you're gorgeous! I mean its gorgeous! I mean, oh gosh...” he said, wilting with bashfulness and so shy. Goetia didn't seem to understand, for while his parts were as old as spirit itself, Goetia himself as a consciousness was new and young. Thus, he crouched in front of his master and reached forth to take Solomon's wrists in his warm hands, guide them away from the young king's eyes.

“Have no fear, master,” Goetia replied, lifting Solomon's hands to press reverent kisses to his ringed fingers, “We are as you wish us to be, thus we shall protect you, consul you, support you and love you as you have instructed. We are yours, now and forever.”

This did nothing to ease the pinkness of the king's face but he did feel relieved, his heart warmed a little as he threaded his fingers through Goetia's gently.

“Good,” he said softly, his smile light, “Let us get to work then.”

And Goetia nodded.

[absoluterpmemetrash]

below are 200+ quotes taken from FromSoftware’s 2016 video game release DARK SOULS III. feel free to change pronouns as necessary.

“The next time we cross paths, one may find the other in a time of need.”

“He's not very talkative. But don't think ill of him.”

“Without his help, I would have cursed this onerous duty long ago.

“What's happened to you?"

"Please, stop this!"

“It pains me to leave you.”

“Forgive me... I was weak on my own..."

“Don't leave me, not you... Not like the others...”

“I am well pleased to see you safe.”

“To my shame, I was snared by a trap, and we've become separated.”

“He's probably searching for me right now, with twice the resolve.”

“Please send him my word. I beg of you.”

“Have you abandoned me?”

“Thank you, we are both in your debt.”

“Please, take this. Recompense for my foolish request. And also a token of protection.”

“Please. Lend me your strength.”

“I owe this to you. Thank you. Truly.”

“Well, a newcomer I see.”

“Prithee, be careful. I don't want to see my work squandered!”

“In battle, your weapons are your only friends. Forge them well, and they won't let you down.”

“Oh, please, don't give me that look. Believe it or not, I'm quite thin-skinned.”

“Hardly a surprise is it? I've never been one for books or wise men."

“A cursed fate this may be, but hope remains, does it not?"

“It's but a small service, to pay my humble respects."

“I may serve, but I'm no slave.”

“Name thyself, stranger.”

“What beckoned thee to such a place?"

“I will grant thee purpose.”

“If I can provide thee succour, only tell me how.”

“Heridom taketh many forms, indeed.”

“Art thou a creature of the air, or other winged thing?"

“Oh, my! I imagined it might be so.”

“Then thou'rt a dragon, or perhaps a crow?”

“Well, whatever thou beest, thou'rt wondrous strange, yet strangely familiar, visitor."

"I'm ashamed to say, I know not much of anything…"

“Oh where could my dear brother be?”

“But here we are, an encounter for the ages!”

“A chance encounter should not be squandered.”

“I will not rush you. You will return, once you are enlightened.”

“Fear the fire.”

“Well, well... I've never seen anything like this.”

“Brilliant. I will never curse being old and Undead again.”

“Now, now, show it here, quickly. Let us channel them together.”

“If only I were a woman.”

“I'm afraid I cannot accept this.”

“I cannot comprehend this myself, let alone teach it to you.”

“Only one terribly afflicted, or burdened by deep sorrow, could begin to understand this.”

“When a pupil strays from the path, the master must intrude.”

“Spare the rod and spoil the child.”

“Little bird, what's to be gained?”

“Hmm, well, there's nothing forlorn about you.”

“Make the tales true, and burn this world away.”

“Surely you've seen the rot that afflicts this world.”

“When the world rots, we set it afire. For the sake of the next world.”

“Allow me to speak frankly.”

“This farewell gift is for you.”

“Is this not the calling of your kind, since ages past?"

“Please save his soul." 

“If you’ve any sense, you’ll go find a coffin to huddle up inside.” 

“You’ll face death, and it won’t be pretty.”

“You like poking around in cells, do you? How very genteel!"

“Ah-hah, taken an interest in her, have you?”

“How very quaint, pitying creatures that are beyond help.” 

“I am allied to you as long as you assure the girl's safety.”

“I just dropped in to see how she's getting on.”

“Even a broken woman deserves her dignity…"

“I tend to the flame, and tend to thee.”

“Then touch the darkness inside me.”

“Take nourishment from these sovereignless souls."

“Speak thine heart's desire.”

“Bring me souls, plucked from their vessels.” 

“I sense that he possesseth some knowledge.”

“Know'st thou not? I cannot die. “

“These will reveal, through a sliver of light, frightful images of betrayal.”

“Please, kill me, and take these eyes away.”

“I serve thee, and will do as thou bid'st. “

“This will be our private affair. No one else may know of this.”

“But one day, tiny flames will dance across the darkness.”

“I am not asking for charity.”

“I may be a petty thief, but I've more wits than most royalty.”

“I humbly place my faith in you.” 

“Do your part, and I’ll do mine.”

“As they say, "The cornered rat will lick the balls of a cat."”

“Cold piss, what the devil is it now?”

“Forgive me, dear.”

“Whatever trinket you need, speak up. Just don't ask me where I got them.”

“Do me a favour, and don't forget our promise.”

“You can keep the ring. As, well, a little trinket of thanks, I suppose.”

“En garde, you crusty ash bastard!”

“Everyone's dead or hollowed away anyway, right, so… I might as well fetch some weapons or treasure for you.”

“I'm ready to go thieving at a moment's notice.”

“If the tales are true, it is home to old moon-worshiping nobles, and should be packed with treasure.”

“Not a single man has returned from the castle unscathed, even back in the day.”

“I consider myself your friend.”

“I lived a petty rat, but would rather not die as one.”

“Thank you, for placing your trust in me.”

“Can't even die right. Gives me conniptions.”

“We're not fit to lick their boots.”

“The poor wretched souls… Be they lord or legend, the curse shows no mercy.”

“You should see where it leads. ...If you've the stones for it."

“I'm a deserter, I know. But I've still plenty of fight in me.”

“We'll never amount to anything, not you, not I…"

“You crawled out of the ground, for gods' sake..."

“Go on, be as bloody mad as you like."

“It's important to know who you are.

“No, no, of course you're not. That's what you mad fools always say.”

“The shackles of the Gods are fragile.”

"Oh well, another addition to the family."

"Right, onto the pile with you. You're family now..."

“The dark surrounds me, nibbles at my flesh.”

“So please, hold out your hand, and touch me..."

“Ahh, yes, there you are, so close indeed. Then I am not entirely alone, just yet.”

“If it would not trouble you, might I enter into your service, instead?"

“I thank you deeply. For your touch. I will never forget it, not ever."

“Don't worry about me. I've long dealt in dark. It is my calling."

“The gods are ever-merciful. My gratitude lies with them, and with you.”

“I am yours now. Your wish is my command."

“I would be pleased to share the tales of miracles with you.”

“These are dark tales that lurk deep within men... These stories would not please you...”

“Ahh, ahh, sweet Champion. Where have you been? Please, your touch…

touch me, one last time.”

“And kill me, as you promised you would."

“Unknowing visitor, return from whence thou camest.”

“By the King's decree. None may disturb our mistress's slumber.”

"I thought you'd all but forgotten me. How sweet."

"Good to know that a skinny little heretic can still turn heads."

"Accept my apologies, for mistaking you for one of those leeches."

"This is a land of monstrosities. And I am no exception."

"Is that something you can forgive?"

"The only thing that might interest you is my sorcery."

"You're a wicked one, aren't you?"

"Some may avert their eyes, but the truth remains the truth."

"Let it be a secret, kept between you and I..."

"There is a darkness within man, and I am afraid you will peer into it."

“Don't torture me so."

“I know, I know. I owe my life to you.”

“Today's lost are conquerors tomorrow.”

“Oh, look at you, you've got your head screwed on correct.”

“I have a feeling we're going to make a fabulous team. Oh, you'll see, you'll see!”

“Yes, I try to play it off, but i haven't a clue about my past. Who I was , or what I lived for. Not even my own blessed name.”

“I know who you are, a righteous warrior, yes, with a solemn duty to boot?”

“Ohh, look at you, you found the treasure!”

“I've got the last of my brew. Let's have our own little toast with it.”

“To my search, and to your duty. And to the joy that lies before us.”

“I know you'd never lie to me.”

“It won't be long now, before I know everything. Who I was, what I lived for, and what my name was. And I'll have you to thank for it all.”

“I swear upon my birth name that I am your friend. No matter what might come out, no matter what I was.”

“If you would do me the honour, allow me to be a true friend, always.”

“Every age, it seems, is tainted by the greed of men.”

“What's wrong, friend?

“Stop it! Oh, please!”

“I'm unbreakable! You can't crack me! I'll rot yer flesh!”

"I can see it in your eyes. If you didn't invade, didn't pillage, whatever would you do?"

"Can you even hear me? If you can, cease this at once.”

“Felt sorry for the poor thing, in all her festering glory?”

“I sowed the seeds. I'll prune the mess.”

“Fear not, the dark, my friend. And let the feast begin.”

“The world began without knowledge, and without knowledge will it end.”

“Well, this is unexpected. I don't often have visitors.”

“If you haven't any business, I've reading to get back to."

“Indeed, I am a sorcerer. With plenty to share.”

“We will learn together, it shall be like our very own school."

“...Oh you could at least act as if you are paying attention!"

“In exchange for my sorceries, you are to bring me knowledge.”

“I hope you're not one to break a promise."

“It is folly to claim lives recklessly, friend. Do not be tempted.”

“Go on. If I'm giving something away, you'd better well take it."

“With this, you can be sure to tell friend from foe from your very first encounter.”

“All of these sorceries, and you've mastered every one.”

“It's been nice running our own little school."

“I believe...I feel the scent of ash upon thee.”

“Please tell me thy name. I would name this painting after thee.”

“Your spouse awaits you, you are very near.”

"Dost thou the gods serve? Or merely that role affect?"

"Yes, yes, of course. How wouldst one such as thee do service to the gods?"

“Speak thee the name of God. Thine own god, if thou canst recall.”

“Thou'st a kind heart to speak to a captive such as I.”

“I am honoured to have met thee.”

“At once, I am the honour of the gods, the glory of fire, and the fear of the dark.”

“Is it not our sorry fate, to sup on death?"

“A lost lamb wandereth in, with nary a peep from the bell.”

“I, too, am bound by duty, but can offer you my sign.”

“I would not have made it alone. You have my deepest gratitude."

“May I take a vow? To serve you, as a knight."

“I, [Name], do hereby serve as your faithful knight. Wherever, whenever, I am needed, and even if all should turn against you… My loyalty shall never waver.”

“If we meet again, it will be as adversaries.”

“You've the same scent as that woman...”

“I've nothing for you, not a smithereen. I just like to stand here, and take in the view.”

“Why, where did you hear that name, love?”

“You're not willing to reconsider, are you?”

“It's a rare thing, to have a true duty.”

“Don't run off and die, love. It's a nicer view with you in it.”

“...My time has come, has it? Well, maybe I'll get to see an angel.”

“Well, say hello to the nice giant! He adores visitors."

“What! Where's the bloody giant?”

“Oh, I am sorry. That was my hand, as you know, but the deed, well, that was the armour's doing.”

“Be more careful! By the gods, curiosity is going to kill you kittens.”

"Have no fear, there's beauty in death.”

“I'll come clean, I did you wrong. I didn't mean it, though, not one bit.”

“You get these... urges... running the business and all... Oh, and I hate myself for it, I do.”

“Oh, for heaven's sake, no need to jest with a face like that.”

“Please, grant me death, Undo my shackles."

“To be in your presence is a great honour.”

“I will remain in this spot. Praying solemnly that you might have a change of heart.”

“Good tidings. Thy spouse is ready. The time is ripe to greet him/her.”

“I presume thy holy vows are sworn?”

“Fret not, fret not. My feet are here firmly planted.”

“I may be but small, but I will die a colossus."

“The eyes show a world destitute of fire, a barren plane of endless darkness. A place born of betrayal.”

“Choose thy fate alone. Seize it with thine own hands.”

“Please, help me. Be done with me... No, gods, no, I cannot bear it... It burns, burns, help me..."

“Oh, dear, another dogged contender.”

“You've done quite enough, now have your rest.”

“Rise, if you would... For that is our curse.”

“You remain among the Accursed.”

“This spot marks our grave, but you may rest here too, if you would like...”

“Ahh, you ignorant slaves. Finally taken notice have you?”

“Where have you gone? Are you hiding from me?”

“Come out, come out, don't be afraid.”

“You were born a child of dragons, what could you possibly fear?”

“I see flame. Flame, flickering, once again.”

“Not enough blood yet shed.”

“Please avert thine eyes. I will snuff out these ashes for good.”

“Return from whence thou cam'st, for that is thy place of belonging.”

[aromantic-eight]

[id: Odinson (previously Thor), the new Thor (Jane Foster), Nancy Whitehead (Squirrel Girl’s roommate), and Tippy-Toe (a squirrel) are all in conference together about the latest threat to earth.

Thor looks at Nancy, saying, “Thank you, Lady Whitehead. This information may well prove invaluable.”

Nancy: “Oh! You’re welcome!”

Thor: "And yet the question remains: how did Ratatoskr make good her escape?"

Odinson: "Her prison was forged by All-Father Odin using the power of Yggrasil itself. The only way out would be through asgardian manipulation, yet I can think of no asgardian who would ever meddle so recklessly."

From off-screen there's an "Ahem". The screen pans to reveal Loki leaning in the doorframe, who says, "Yeah, this one miiiiiight be on me. my bad, right?"

Odinson, Thor, Nancy, and Tippy-Toe glare.

Loki spreads her hands, protesting: “What?! I said "my bad"!” She curtsies to new Thor, lifting the edges of her coat up as though they were a skirt, and says, “Good to see you, Actual Thor, The Only One Truly Worthy Of Wielding Mjolnir.”

Thor: “Well met, Loki.”

Odinson: “.....Loki.”

Loki continues, “And hey there, Odinson, He Of No Particular Title Anymore, Too Bad For Him, Ha Ha Ha Looks Like He's Not Worthy After All, Oh Well.” She turns to Nancy. “And you are.....?”

Nancy holds her hand out to Loki, saying, “Nancy Whitehead, I'm a big fan of, uh.... some of your work?”

Loki grabs her hand between both of hers, saying, “Such honesty! I love it. All right, Nancy, name your favorite celebrity. I do great impressions. Shape-shifter, and all that.”

Odinson: “Even now Midgard hangs in the balance, brother, so Lady Whitehead is not interested in your cheap parlour--”

Nancy interrupts, saying, “Cat Thor. Odinson as a cat.”

Loki, with sparkles around her hand, says, “Nancy Whitehead----” Her head changes into that of a cartoon white cat wearing a small Viking helmet as she finishes, “ ---where have you been all my life? “

Thor: “Loki, you said thou were responsible for Ratatoskr's escape.”

Loki, head still cat-shaped, says, “No, I just said "my bad," I'm not responsible for it. Obviously I didn't do it intentionally.” Nancy, meanwhile, lifts her smartphone to take a picture of Cat Thor Loki arguing with Odinson.

Odinson: “Loki, I would ask thee to stop being Cat Thor.”

Loki: “Not on your life.” She continues, explaining, “So the thing is, there was a time when I had a lot of schemes going on at once, okay? And some of those maybe took a few centuries to, you know, ripen. And we can all agree that when a fella has so many irons in the fire, it's clear even the harshest judges of character much forgive him for forgetting one teensy weensy tiny winey little scheme! And therefore, in conclusion, that's how come it's not my fault that Ratatoskr escaped.”

Thor and Odinson both glare at her. Thor says, “Loki, I know there is some good in you. Undo what you have wrought. Help us repair the beast's cage.”

Odinson adds, “Also, I know thou art making thy stupid cat head bigger only to annoy me.”

Loki: Oh, does this annoy you? Does my new regular head annoy you? Because this is my new regular head forever now. Anyway, I don't want Midgard destroyed either, so I'm happy to help. The last time Ratatoskr had free rein down there all the raptors got replaced by hairless apes who invented tax machines, so her track record is, shall we say, not the greatest. But you must know it's more than just trapping her here. We need to stop her down there too, but every time anyone gets close to her, she whispers in their ears and they switch sides, it's pretty impressive, it's why I chose her way back when.”

Off-screen, someone says, “If we could but silence the beast, we might then protect ourselves...while also restoring the mortals caught in her thrall.”

Odinson, Loki, and Nancy huddle together, talking.

Odinson: “True, Thor, but legends tell of our greatest warriors trying and failing to silence her. I fear it cannot be done.”

Nancy: “Guys, there might be a really obvious downside to this that I'm not seeing, but...is there a reason why we couldn't just wear earplugs?”

Odinson and Loki both turn to stare at Nancy. She continues, “I mean, obviously then we wouldn't be able to talk to each other, but that's just the naïve implementation. We could even build communication into the earplugs-- Asgardian technology includes Bluetooth headsets, right. Wait, you probably call it by a different name. Uh, they're the little phone things you put in your ear for when you really want to look like an important businessperson, but also like a huge tool at the exact same time??”

Loki: “Asgardians mostly rely on "horseback messengers" over tech. I know, I don't get it either.”

Nancy: “Oh, well it's no big deal. I made a client for them once. Basically you just tale an EM field at 2.4+ ghz, divide that band into 79 one-MHz channels, and then it's an ad-hoc network using a packet-based protocol that---” She pauses. “Oh my god. I'm gonna be the one who brings Bluetooth to Asgard.”

end id]

The adventures of Cat Thor part 1 (part 2 epilogue)

Or that time old Loki’s schemes let lose an evil super powerful squirrel on poor Midgard from Squirrel Girl vol 2

[readbookywooks]

A GOOD NIGHT'S WORK

ABOUT four hours later Tirian flung himself into one of the bunks to snatch a little sleep. The two children were already snoring: he had made them go to bed before he did because they would have to be up most of the night and he knew that at their age they couldn't do without sleep. Also, he had tired them out. First he had given Jill some practice in archery and found that, though not up to Narnian standards, she was really not too bad. Indeed she had succeeded in shooting a rabbit (not a Talking rabbit, of course: there are lots of the ordinary kind about in Western Narnia) and it was already skinned, cleaned, and hanging up. He had found that both the children knew all about this chilly and smelly job; they had learned that kind of thing on their great journey through Giant-Land in the days of Prince Rilian. Then he had tried to teach Eustace how to use his sword and shield. Eustace had learned quite a lot about sword fighting on his earlier adventures but that had been all with a straight Narnian sword. He had never handled a curved Calormene scimitar and that made it hard, for many of the strokes are quite different and some of the habits he had learned with the long sword had now to be unlearned again. But Tirian found that he had a good eye and was very quick on his feet. He was surprised at the strength of both children: in fact they both seemed to be already much stronger and bigger and more grown-up than they had been when he first met them a few hours ago. It is one of the effects which Narnian air often has on visitors from our world. All three of them agreed that the very first thing they must do was to go back to Stable Hill and try to rescue Jewel the Unicorn. After that, if they succeeded, they would try to get away Eastward and meet the little army which Roonwit the Centaur would be bringing from Cair Paravel. An experienced warrior and huntsman like Tirian can always wake up at the time he wants. So he gave himself till nine o'clock that night and then put all worries out of his head and fell asleep at once. It seemed only a moment later when he woke but he knew by the light and the very feel of things that he had timed his sleep exactly. He got up, put on his helmet-and-turban (he had slept in his mail shirt), and then shook the other two till they woke up. They looked, to tell the truth, very grey and dismal as they climbed out of their bunks and there was a good deal of yawning. "Now," said Tirian, "we go due North from here - by good fortune 'tis a starry night - and it will be much shorter than our journey this morning, for then we went round-about but now we shall go straight. If we are challenged, then do you two hold your peace and I will do my best to talk like a curst, cruel, proud lord of Calormen. If I draw my sword then thou, Eustace, must do likewise and let Jill leap behind us and stand with an arrow on the string. But if I cry `Home', then fly for the Tower both of you. And let none try to fight on - not even one stroke after I have given the retreat: such false valour has spoiled many notable plans in the wars. And now, friends, in the name of Aslan let us go forward." Out they went into the cold night. All the great Northern stars were burning above the tree-tops. The North-Star of that world is called the Spear-Head: it is brighter than our Pole Star. For a time they could go straight towards the Spear-Head but presently they came to a dense thicket so that they had to go out of their course to get round it. And after that - for they were still overshadowed by branches - it was hard to pick up their bearings. It was Jill who set them right again: she had been an excellent Guide in England. And of course she knew her Narnian stars perfectly, having travelled so much in the wild Northern Lands, and could work out the direction from other stars even when the Spear-Head was hidden. As soon as Tirian saw that she was the best pathfinder of the three of them he put her in front. And then he was astonished to find how silently and almost invisibly she glided on before them. "By the Mane!" he whispered to Eustace. "This girl is a wondrous wood-maid. If she had Dryad's blood in her she could scarce do it better." "She's so small, that's what helps," whispered Eustace. But Jill from in front said: "S-s-s-h, less noise." All round them the wood was very quiet. Indeed it was far too quiet. On an ordinary Narnia night there ought to have been noises - an occasional cheery "Goodnight" from a Hedgehog, the cry of an Owl overhead, perhaps a flute in the distance to tell of Fauns dancing, or some throbbing, hammering noises from Dwarfs underground. All that was silenced: gloom and fear reigned over Narnia. After a time they began to go steeply uphill and the trees grew further apart. Tirian could dimly make out the wellknown hill-top and the stable. Jill was now going with more and more caution: she kept on making signs to the others with her hand to do the same. Then she stopped dead still and Tirian saw her gradually sink down into the grass and disappear without a sound. A moment later she rose again, put her mouth close to Tirian's ear, and said in the lowest possible whisper, "Get down. Thee better." She said thee for see not because she had a lisp but because she knew the hissing letter S is the part of a whisper most likely to be overheard. Tirian at once lay down, almost as silently as Jill, but not quite, for he was heavier and older. And once they were down, he saw how from that position you could see the edge of the hill sharp against the star-strewn sky. Two black shapes rose against it: one was the stable, and the other, a few feet in front of it, was a Calormene sentry. He was keeping very ill watch: not walking or even standing but sitting with his spear over his shoulder and his chin on his chest. "Well done," said Tirian to Jill. She had shown him exactly what he needed to know. They got up and Tirian now took the lead. Very slowly, hardly daring to breathe, they made their way up to a little clump of trees which was not more than forty feet away from the sentinel. "Wait here till I come again," he whispered to the other two. "If I miscarry, fly." Then he sauntered out boldly in full view of the enemy. The man started when he saw him and was just going to jump to his feet: he was afraid Tirian might be one of his own officers and that he would get into trouble for sitting down. But before he could get up Tirian had dropped on one knee beside him, saying: "Art thou a warrior of the Tisroc's, may he live for ever? It cheers my heart to meet thee among all these beasts and devils of Narnians. Give me thy hand, friend." Before he well knew what was happening the Calormene sentry found his right hand seized in a mighty grip. Next instant someone was kneeling on his legs and a dagger was pressed against his neck. "One noise and thou art dead," said Tirian in his ear. "Tell me where the Unicorn is and thou shalt live." "B - behind the stable, O My Master," stammered the unfortunate man. "Good. Rise up and lead me to him." As the man got up the point of the dagger never left his neck. It only travelled round (cold and rather ticklish) as Tirian got behind him and settled it at a convenient place under his ear. Trembling he went round to the back of the stable. Though it was dark Tirian could see the white shape of Jewel at once. "Hush!" he said. "No, do not neigh. Yes, Jewel, it is I. How have they tied thee?" "Hobbled by all four legs and tied with a bridle to a ring in the stable wall," came Jewel's voice. "Stand here, sentry, with your back to the wall. So. Now, Jewel: set the point of your horn against this Calormene's breast." "With a good will, Sire," said Jewel. "If he moves, rive him to the heart." Then in a few seconds Tirian cut the ropes. With the remains of them he bound the sentry hand and foot. Finally he made him open his mouth, stuffed it full of grass and tied him up from scalp to chin so that he could make no noise, lowered the man into a sitting position and set him against the wall. "I have done thee some discourtesy, soldier," said Tirian. "But such was my need. If we meet again I may happen to do thee a better turn. Now, Jewel, let us go softly." He put his left arm round the beast's neck and bent and kissed its nose and both had great joy. They went back as quietly as possible to the place where he had left the children. It was darker in there under the trees and he nearly ran into Eustace before he saw him. "All's well," whispered Tirian. "A good night's work. Now for home." They turned and had gone a few paces when Eustace said, "Where are you, Pole?" There was no answer. "Is Jill on the other side of you, Sire?" he asked. "What?" said Tirian. "Is she not on the other side of your" It was a terrible moment. They dared not shout but they whispered her name in the loudest whisper they could manage. There was no reply. "Did she go from you while I was away?" asked Tirian. "I didn't see or hear her go," said Eustace. "But she could have gone without my knowing. She can be as quiet as a cat; you've seen for yourself." At that moment a far off drum beat was heard. Jewel moved his ears forward. "Dwarfs," he said. "And treacherous Dwarfs, enemies, as likely as not," muttered Tirian. "And here comes something on hoofs, much nearer," said Jewel. The two humans and the Unicorn stood dead still. There were now so many different things to worry about that they didn't know what to do. The noise of hoofs came steadily nearer. And then, quite close to them, a voice whispered: "Hallo! Are you all there?" Thank heaven, it was Jill's. "Where the devil have you been to?" said Eustace in a furious whisper, for he had been very frightened. "In the stable," gasped Jill, but it was the sort of gasp you give when you're struggling with suppressed laughter. "Oh," growled Eustace, "you think it funny, do you? Well all I can say is - " "Have you got Jewel, Sire?" asked Jill. "Yes. Here he is. What is that beast with you?" "That's him," said Jill. "But let's be off home before anyone wakes up." And again there came little explosions of laughter. The others obeyed at once for they had already lingered long enough in that dangerous place and the Dwarf drums seemed to have come a little nearer. It was only after they had been walking Southward for several minutes that Eustace said: "Got him? What do you mean?" "The false Aslan," said Jill. "What?" said Tirian. "Where have you been? What have you done?" "Well, Sire," said Jill. "As soon as I saw that you'd got the sentry out of the way I thought hadn't I better have a look inside the stable and see what really is there? So I crawled along. It was as easy as anything to draw the bolt. Of course it was pitch black inside and smelled like any other stable. Then I struck a light and - would you believe it? - there was nothing at all there but this old donkey with a bundle of lion-skin tied on to his back. So I drew my knife and told him he'd have to come along with me. As a matter of fact I needn't have threatened him with the knife at all. He was very fed up with the stable and quite ready to come - weren't you, Puzzle dear?" "Great Scott!" said Eustace. "Well I'm - jiggered. I was jolly angry with you a moment ago, and I still think it was mean of you to sneak off without the rest of us: but I must admit - well, I mean to say - well it was a perfectly gorgeous thing to do. If she was a boy she'd have to be knighted, wouldn't she, Sire?" "If she was a boy," said Tirian, "she'd be whipped for disobeying orders." And in the dark no one could see whether he said this with a frown or a smile. Next minute there was a sound of rasping metal. "What are you doing, Sire?" asked Jewel sharply. "Drawing my sword to smite off the head of the accursed Ass," said Tirian in a terrible voice. "Stand clear, girl." "Oh don't, please don't," said Jill. "Really, you mustn't. It wasn't his fault. It was all the Ape. He didn't know any better. And he's very sorry. And he's a nice Donkey. His name's Puzzle. And I've got my arms round his neck." "Jill," said Tirian, "you are the bravest and most woodwise of all my subjects, but also the most malapert and disobedient. Well: let the Ass live. What have you to say for yourself, Ass?" "Me, Sire?" came the Donkey's voice. "I'm sure I'm very sorry if I've done wrong. The Ape said Aslan wanted me to dress up like that. And I thought he'd know. I'm not clever like him. I only did what I was told. It wasn't any fun for me living in that stable. I don't even know what's been going on outside. He never let me out except for a minute or two at night. Some days they forgot to give me any water too." "Sire," said Jewel. "Those Dwarfs are coming nearer and nearer. Do we want to meet them?" Tirian thought for a moment and then suddenly gave a great laugh out loud. Then he spoke, not this time in a whisper. "By the Lion," he said, "I am growing slow witted! Meet them? Certainly we will meet them. We will meet anyone now. We have this Ass to show them. Let them see the thing they have feared and bowed to. We can show them the truth of the Ape's vile plot. His secret's out. The tide's turned. Tomorrow we shall hang that Ape on the highest tree in Narnia. No more whispering and skulking and disguises. Where are these honest Dwarfs? We have good news for them." When you have been whispering for hours the mere sound of anyone talking out loud has a wonderfully stirring effect. The whole party began talking and laughing: even Puzzle lifted up his head and gave a grand Haw-hee-haw-hee-hee; a thing the Ape hadn't allowed him to do for days. Then they set off in the direction of the drumming. It grew steadily louder and soon they could see torchlight as well. They came out on one of those rough roads (we should hardly call them roads at all in England) which ran through Lantern Waste. And there, marching sturdily along, were about thirty Dwarfs, all with their little spades and mattocks over their shoulders. Two armed Calormenes led the column and two more brought up the rear. "Stay!" thundered Tirian as he stepped out on the road. "Stay, soldiers. Whither do you lead these Narnian Dwarfs and by whose orders?"

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WHO WILL GO INTO THE STABLE?

JILL felt something tickling her ear. It was Jewel the Unicorn, whispering to her with the wide whisper of a horse's mouth. As soon as she heard what he was saying she nodded and tip-toed back to where Puzzle was standing. Quickly and quietly she cut the last cords that bound the lion-skin to him. It wouldn't do for him to be caught with that on, after what the Ape had said! She would like to have hidden the skin somewhere very far away, but it was too heavy. The best she could do was to kick it in among the thickest bushes. Then she made signs to Puzzle to follow her and they both joined the others. The Ape was speaking again. "And after a horrid thing like that, Aslan - Tashlan - is angrier than ever. He says he's been a great deal too good to you, coming out every night to be looked at, see! Well, he's not coming out any more." Howls and mewings and squeals and grunts were the Animals' answer to this, but suddenly a quite different voice broke in with a loud laugh. "Hark what the monkey says," it shouted. "We know why he isn't going to bring his precious Aslan out. I'll tell you why: because he hasn't got him. He never had anything except an old donkey with a lion-skin on its back. Now he's lost that and he doesn't know what to do." Tirian could not see the faces on the other side of the fire very well but he guessed this was Griffle the Chief Dwarf. And he was quite certain of it when, a second later, all the Dwarfs' voices joined in, singing: "Don't know what to do! Don't know what to do! Don't know what to do-o-o!" "Silence!" thundered Rishda Tarkaan. "Silence, children of mud! Listen to me, you other Narnians, lest I give command to my warriors to fall upon you with the edge of the sword. The Lord Shift has already told you of that wicked Ass. Do you think, because of him that there is no real Tashlan in the stable! Do you? Beware, beware." "No, no," shouted most of the crowd. But the Dwarfs said, "That's right, Darkie, you've got it. Come on, Monkey, show us what's in the stable, seeing is believing." When next there was a moment's quiet the Ape said: "You Dwarfs think you're very clever, don't you? But not so fast. I never said you couldn't see Tashlan. Anyone who likes can see him." The whole assembly became silent. Then, after nearly a minute, the Bear began in a slow, puzzled voice: "I don't quite understand all this," it grumbled, "I thought you said - " "You thought!" repeated the Ape. "As if anyone could call what goes on in your head thinking. Listen, you others. Anyone can see Tashlan. But he's not coming out. You have to go in and see him." "Oh, thank you, thank you, thank you," said dozens of voices. "That's what we wanted! We can go in and see him face to face. And now he'll be kind and it will all be as it used to be." And the Birds chattered, and the Dogs barked excitedly. Then suddenly, there was a great stirring and a noise of creatures rising to their feet, and in a second the whole lot of them would have been rushing forward and trying to crowd into the stable door all together. But the Ape shouted: "Get back! Quiet! Not so fast." The Beasts stopped, many of them with one paw in the with tails wagging, and all of them with heads on one side. "I thought you said," began the Bear, but Shift interrupted. "Anyone can go in," he said. "But, one at a time. Who'll go first? He didn't say he was feeling very kind. He's been licking his lips a lot since he swallowed up the wicked King the other night. He's been growling a good deal this morning. I wouldn't much like to go into that stable myself tonight. But just as you please. Who'd like to go in first? Don't blame me if he swallows you whole or blasts you into a cinder with the mere terror of his eyes. That's your affair. Now then! Who's first? What about one of you Dwarfs?" "Dilly, dilly, come and be killed!" sneered Griffle. "How do we know what you've got in there?" "Ho-ho!" cried the Ape. "So you're beginning to think there's something there, eh? Well, all you Beasts were making noise enough a minute ago. What's struck you all dumb? Who's going in first?" But the Beasts all stood looking at one another and began backing away from the stable. Very few tails were wagging now. The Ape waddled to and fro jeering at them. "Ho-ho-ho!" he chuckled. "I thought you were all so eager to see Tashlan face to face! Changed your mind, eh?" Tirian bent his head to hear something that Jill was trying to whisper in his ear. "What do you think is really inside the stable?" she said. "Who knows?" said Tirian. "Two Calormenes with drawn swords, as likely as not, one on each side of the door." "You don't think," said Jill, "it might be... you know... that horrid thing we saw?" "Tash himself?" whispered Tirian. "There's no knowing. But courage, child: we are all between the paws of the true Aslan." Then a most surprising thing happened. Ginger the Cat said in a cool, clear voice, not at all as if he was excited, "I'll go in, if you like." Every creature turned and fixed its eyes on the Cat. "Mark their subtleties, Sire," said Poggin to the King. "This cursed cat is in the plot, in the very centre of it. Whatever is in the stable will not hurt him, I'll be bound. Then Ginger will come out again and say that he has seen some wonder." But Tirian had no time to answer him. The Ape was calling the Cat to come forward. "Ho-ho!" said the Ape. "So you, a pert Puss, would look upon him face to face. Come on, then! I'll open the door for you. Don't blame me if he scares the whiskers off your face. That's your affair." And the Cat got up and came out of its place in the crowd, walking primly and daintily, with its tail in the air, not one hair on its sleek coat out of place. It came on till it had passed the fire and was so close that Tirian, from where he stood with his shoulder against the end-wall of the stable, could look right into its face. Its big green eyes never blinked. ("Cool as a cucumber," muttered Eustace. "It knows it has nothing to fear.") The Ape, chuckling and making faces, shuttled across beside the Cat: put up his paw: drew the bolt and opened the door. Tirian thought he could hear the Cat purring as it walked into the dark doorway. "Aii-aii-aouwee! - " The most horrible caterwaul you ever heard made everyone jump. You have been wakened yourself by cats quarrelling or making love on the roof in the middle of the night: you know the sound. This was worse. The Ape was knocked head over heels by Ginger coming back out of the stable at top speed. If you had not known he was a cat, you might have thought he was a ginger-coloured streak of lightning. He shot across the open grass, back into the crowd. No one wants to meet a cat in that state. You could see animals getting out of his way to left and right. He dashed up a tree, whisked around, and hung head downwards. His tail was bristled out till it was nearly as thick as his whole body: his eyes were like saucers of green fire: along his back every single hair stood on end. "I'd give my beard," whispered Poggin, "to know whether that brute is only acting or whether it has really found something in there that frightened it!" "Peace, friend," said Tirian, for the Captain and the Ape were also whispering and he wanted to hear what they said. He did not succeed, except that he heard the Ape once more whimpering "My head, my head," but he got the idea that those two were almost as puzzled by the cat's behaviour as himself. "Now, Ginger," said the Captain. "Enough of that noise. Tell them what thou hast seen." "Aii - Aii - Aaow - Awah," screamed the Cat. "Art thou not called a Talking Beast?" said the Captain. "Then hold thy devilish noise and talk." What followed was rather horrible. Tirian felt quite certain (and so did the others) that the Cat was trying to say something: but nothing came out of his mouth except the ordinary, ugly cat-noises you might hear from any angry or frightened old Tom in a backyard in England. And the longer he caterwauled the less like a Talking Beast he looked. Uneasy whimperings and little sharp squeals broke out from among the other Animals. "Look, look!" said the voice of the Bear. "It can't talk. It has forgotten how to talk! It has gone back to being a dumb beast. Look at its face." Everyone saw that it was true. And then the greatest terror of all fell upon those Narnians. For every one of them had been taught - when it was only a chick or a puppy or a cub - how Aslan at the beginning of the world had turned the beasts of Narnia into Talking Beasts and warned them that if they weren't good they might one day be turned back again and be like the poor witless animals one meets in other countries. "And now it is coming upon us," they moaned. "Mercy! Mercy!" wailed the Beasts. "Spare us, Lord Shift, stand between us and Aslan, you must always go in and speak to him for us. We daren't, we daren't." Ginger disappeared further up into the tree. No one ever saw him again. Tirian stood with his hand on his sword-hilt and his head bowed. He was dazed with the horrors of that night. Sometimes he thought it would be best to draw his sword at once and rush upon the Calormenes: then next moment he thought it would be better to wait and see what new turn affairs might take. And now a new turn came. "My Father," came a clear, ringing voice from the left of the crowd. Tirian knew at once that it was one of the Calormenes speaking, for in The Tisroc's army the common soldiers call the officers "My Master" but the officers call their senior officers "My Father". Jill and Eustace didn't know this but, after looking this way and that, they saw the speaker, for of course people at the sides of the crowd were easier to see than people in the middle where the glare of the fire made all beyond it look rather black. He was young and tall and slender, and even rather beautiful in the dark, haughty, Calormene way. "My Father," he said to the Captain, "I also desire to go in." "Peace, Emeth," said the Captain, "Who called thee to counsel? Does it become a boy to speak?" "My Father," said Emeth. "Truly I am younger than thou, yet I also am of the blood of the Tarkaans even as thou art, and I also am the servant of Tash. Therefore..." "Silence," said Rishda Tarkaan. "Am not I thy Captain? Thou hast nothing to do with this stable. It is for the Narnians." "Nay, my Father," answered Emeth. "Thou hast said that their Aslan and our Tash are all one. And if that is the truth, then Tash himself is in yonder. And how then sayest thou that I have nothing to do with him? For gladly would I die a thousand deaths if I might look once on the face of Tash." "Thou art a fool and understandest nothing," said Rishda Tarkaan. "These be high matters." Emeth's face grew sterner. "Is it then not true that Tash and Aslan are all one?" he asked. "Has the Ape lied to us?" "Of course they're all one," said the Ape. "Swear it, Ape," said Emeth. "Oh dear!" whimpered Shift, "I wish you'd all stop bothering me. My head does ache. Yes, yes, I swear it." "Then, my Father," said Emeth, "I am utterly determined to go in." "Fool," began Rishda Tarkaan, but at once the Dwarfs began shouting: "Come along, Darkie. Why don't you let him in? Why do you let Narnians in and keep your own people out? What have you got in there that you don't want your own men to meet?" Tirian and his friends could only see the back of Rishda Tarkaan, so they never knew what his face looked like as he shrugged his shoulders and said, "Bear witness all that I am guiltless of this young fool's blood. Get thee in, rash boy, and make haste." Then, just as Ginger had done, Emeth came walking forward into the open strip of grass between the bonfire and the stable. His eyes were shining, his face very solemn, his hand was on his sword-hilt, and he carried his head high. Jill felt like crying when she looked at his face. And Jewel whispered in the King's ear, "By the Lion's Mane, I almost love this young warrior, Calormene though he be. He is worthy of a better god than Tash." "I do wish we knew what is really inside there," said Eustace. Emeth opened the door and went in, into the black mouth of the stable. He closed the door behind him. Only a few moments passed - but it seemed longer before the door opened again. A figure in Calormene armour reeled out, fell on its back, and lay still: the door closed behind it. The Captain leaped towards it and bent down to stare at its face. He gave a start of surprise. Then he recovered himself and turned to the crowd, crying out: "The rash boy has had his will. He has looked on Tash and is dead. Take warning, all of you." "We will, we will," said the poor Beasts. But Tirian and his friends stared at the dead Calormene and then at one another. For they, being so close, could see what the crowd, being further off and beyond the fire, could not see: this dead man was not Emeth. He was quite different: an older man, thicker and not so tall, with a big beard. "Ho-ho-ho," chuckled the Ape. "Any more? Anyone else want to go in? Well, as you're all shy, I'll choose the next. You, you Boar! On you come. Drive him up, Calormenes. He shall see Tashlan face to face." "O-o-mph," grunted the Boar, rising heavily to his feet. "Come on, then. Try my tusks." When Tirian saw that brave Beast getting ready to fight for its life - and Calormene soldiers beginning to close in on it with their drawn scimitars - and no one going to its help - something seemed to burst inside him. He no longer cared if this was the best moment to interfere or not. "Swords out," he whispered to the others. "Arrow on string. Follow." Next moment the astonished Narnians saw seven figures leap forth in front of the stable, four of them in shining mail. The King's sword flashed in the firelight as he waved it above his head and cried in a great voice: "Here stand I, Tirian of Narnia, in Aslan's name, to prove with my body that Tash is a foul fiend, the Ape a manifold traitor, and these Calormenes worthy of death. To my side, all true Narnians. Would you wait till your new masters have killed you all one by one?"

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FURTHER UP AND FURTHER IN

"KNOW, O Warlike Kings," said Emeth, "and you, O ladies whose beauty illuminates the universe, that I am Emeth the seventh son of Harpha Tarkaan of the city of Tehishbaan, Westward beyond the desert. I came lately into Narnia with nine and twenty others under the command of Rishda Tarkaan Now when I first heard that we should march upon Narnia I rejoiced; for I had heard many things of your Land and desired greatly to meet you in battle. But when I found that we were to go in disguised as merchants (which is a shameful dress for a warrior and the son of a Tarkaan) and to work by lies and trickery, then my joy departed from me. And most of all when I found we must wait upon a Monkey, and when it began to be said that Tash and Aslan were one, then the world became dark in my eyes. For always since I was a boy I have served Tash and my great desire was to know more of him, if it might be, to look upon his face. But the name of Aslan was hateful to me. "And, as you have seen, we were called together outside the straw-roofed hovel, night after night, and the fire was kindled, and the Ape brought forth out of the hovel something upon four legs that I could not well see. And the people and the Beasts bowed down and did honour to it. But I thought, the Tarkaan is deceived by the Ape: for this thing that comes out of the stable is neither Tash nor any other god. But when I watched the Tarkaan's face, and marked every word that he said to the Monkey, then I changed my mind: for I saw that the Tarkaan did not believe in it himself. And then I understood that he did not believe in Tash at all: for if he had, how could he dare to mock him? "When I understood this, a great rage fell upon me and I wondered that the true Tash did not strike down both the Monkey and the Tarkaan with fire from heaven. Nevertheless I hid my anger and held my tongue and waited to see how it would end. But last night, as some of you know, the Monkey brought not forth the yellow thing but said that all who desired to look upon Tashlan - for so they mixed the two words to pretend that they were all one - must pass one by one into the hovel. And I said to myself, Doubtless this is some other deception. But when the Cat had followed in and had come out again in a madness of terror, then I said to myself, Surely the true Tash, whom they called on without knowledge or belief, has now come among us, and will avenge himself. And though my heart was turned into water inside me because of the greatness and terror of Tash, yet my desire was stronger than my fear, and I put force upon my knees to stay them from trembling, and on my teeth that they should not chatter, and resolved to look upon the face of Tash though he should slay me. So I offered myself to go into the hovel; and the Tarkaan, though unwillingly, let me go. "As soon as I had gone in at the door, the first wonder was that I found myself in this great sunlight (as we all are now) though the inside of the hovel had looked dark from outside. But I had no time to marvel at this, for immediately I was forced to fight for my head against one of our own men. As soon as I saw him I understood that the Monkey and the Tarkaan had set him there to slay any who came in if he were not in their secrets: so that this man also was a liar and a mocker and no true servant of Tash. I had the better will to fight him; and having slain the villain, I cast him out behind me through the door. "Then I looked about me and saw the sky and the wide lands, and smelled the sweetness. And I said, By the Gods, this is a pleasant place: it may be that I am come into the country of Tash. And I began to journey into the strange country and to seek him. "So I went over much grass and many flowers and among all kinds of wholesome and delectable trees till lo! in a narrow place between two rocks there came to meet me a great Lion. The speed of him was like the ostrich, and his size was an elephant's; his hair was like pure gold and the brightness of his eyes like gold that is liquid in the furnace. He was more terrible than the Flaming Mountain of Lagour, and in beauty he surpassed all that is in the world even as the rose in bloom surpasses the dust of the desert. Then I fell at his feet and thought, Surely this is the hour of death, for the Lion (who is worthy of all honour) will know that I have served Tash all my days and not him. Nevertheless, it is better to see the Lion and die than to be Tisroc of the world and live and not to have seen him. But the Glorious One bent down his golden head and touched my forehead with his tongue and said, Son, thou art welcome. But I said, Alas, Lord, I am no son of thine but the servant of Tash. He answered, Child, all the service thou hast done to Tash, I account as service done to me. Then by reasons of my great desire for wisdom and understanding, I overcame my fear and questioned the Glorious One and said, Lord, is it then true, as the Ape said, that thou and Tash are one? The Lion growled so that the earth shook (but his wrath was not against me) and said, It is false. Not because he and I are one, but because we are opposites, I take to me the services which thou hast done to him. For I and he are of such different kinds that no service which is vile can be done to me, and none which is not vile can be done to him. Therefore if any man swear by Tash and keep his oath for the oath's sake, it is by me that he has truly sworn, though he know it not, and it is I who reward him. And if any man do a cruelty in my name, then, though he says the name Aslan, it is Tash whom he serves and by Tash his deed is accepted. Dost thou understand, Child? I said, Lord, thou knowest how much I understand. But I said also (for the truth constrained me), Yet I have been seeking Tash all my days. Beloved, said the Glorious One, unless thy desire had been for me thou wouldst not have sought so long and so truly. For all find what they truly seek. "Then he breathed upon me and took away the trembling from my limbs and caused me to stand upon my feet. And after that, he said not much, but that we should meet again, and I must go further up and further in. Then he turned him about in a storm and flurry of gold and was gone suddenly. "And since then, O Kings and Ladies, I have been wandering to find him and my happiness is so great that it even weakens me like a wound. And this is the marvel of marvels, that he called me Beloved, me who am but as a dog - " "Eh? What's that?" said one of the Dogs. "Sir," said Emeth. "It is but a fashion of speech which we have in Calormen." "Well, I can't say it's one I like very much," said the Dog. "He doesn't mean any harm," said an older Dog. "After all, we call our puppies Boys when they don't behave properly." "So we do," said the first Dog. "Or girls." "S-s-sh!" said the Old Dog. "That's not a nice word to use. Remember where you are." "Look!" said Jill suddenly. Someone was coming, rather timidly, to meet them; a graceful creature on four feet, all silvery-grey. And they stared at him for a whole ten seconds before five or six voices said all at once, "Why, it's old Puzzle!" They had never seen him by daylight with the lion-skin off, and it made an extraordinary difference. He was himself now: a beautiful donkey with such a soft, grey coat and such a gentle, honest face that if you had seen him you would have done just what Jill and Lucy did - rushed forward and put your arms round his neck and kissed his nose and stroked his ears. When they asked him where he had been he said he had come in at the door along with all the other creatures but he had - well, to tell the truth, he had been keeping out of their way as much as he could; and out of Aslan's way. For the sight of the real Lion had made him so ashamed of all that nonsense about dressing up in a lion-skin that he did not know how to look anyone in the face. But when he saw that all his friends were going away Westward, and after he had had a mouthful of grass ("And I've never tasted such good grass in my life," said Puzzle), he plucked up his courage and followed. "But what I'll do if I really have to meet Aslan, I'm sure I don't know," he added. "You'll find it will be all right when you really do," said Queen Lucy. Then they went forward together, always Westward, for that seemed to be the direction Aslan had meant when he cried out, "Further up and futher in." Many other creatures were slowly moving the same way, but that grassy country was very wide and there was no crowding. It still seemed to be early, and the morning freshness was in the air. They kept on stopping to look round and to look behind them, partly because it was so beautiful but partly also because there was something about it which they could not understand. "Peter," said Lucy, "where is this, do you suppose?" "I don't know," said the High King. "It reminds me of somewhere but I can't give it a name. Could it be somewhere we once stayed for a holiday when we were very, very small?" "It would have to have been a jolly good holiday," said Eustace. "I bet there isn't a country like this anywhere in our world. Look at the colours! You couldn't get a blue like the blue on those mountains in our world." "Is it not Aslan's country?" said Tirian. "Not like Aslan's country on top of that mountain beyond the Eastern end of the world," said Jill. "I've been there." "If you ask me," said Edmund, "it's like somewhere in the Narnian world. Look at those mountains ahead - and the big ice-mountains beyond them. Surely they're rather like the mountains we used to see from Narnia, the ones up Westward beyond the Waterfall?" "Yes, so they are," said Peter. "Only these are bigger." "I don't think those ones are so very like anything in Narnia," said Lucy. "But look there." She pointed Southward to their left, and everyone stopped and turned to look. "Those hills," said Lucy, "the nice woody ones and the blue ones behind - aren't they very like the Southern border of Narnia?" "Like!" cried Edmund after a moment's silence. "Why, they're exactly like. Look, there's Mount Pire with his forked head, and there's the pass into Archenland and everything!" "And yet they're not like," said Lucy. "They're different. They have more colours on them and they look further away than I remembered and they're more .. . more... oh, I don't know..." "More like the real thing," said the Lord Digory softly. Suddenly Farsight the Eagle spread his wings, soared thirty or forty feet up into the air, circled round and then alighted on the ground. "Kings and Queens," he cried, "we have all been blind. We are only beginning to see where we are. From up there I have seen it all - Ettinsmuir, Beaversdam, the Great River, and Cair Paravel still shining on the edge of the Eastern Sea. Narnia is not dead. This is Narnia." "But how can it be?" said Peter. "For Aslan told us older ones that we should never return to Narnia, and here we are." "Yes," said Eustace. "And we saw it all destroyed and the sun put out." "And it's all so different," said Lucy. "The Eagle is right," said the Lord Digory. "Listen, Peter. When Aslan said you could never go back to Narnia, he meant the Narnia you were thinking of. But that was not the real Narnia. That had a beginning and an end. It was only a shadow or a copy of the real Narnia which has always been here and always will be here: just as our world, England and all, is only a shadow or copy of something in Aslan's real world. You need not mourn over Narnia, Lucy. All of the old Narnia that mattered, all the dear creatures, have been drawn into the real Narnia through the Door. And of course it is different; as different as a real thing is from a shadow or as waking life is from a dream." His voice stirred everyone like a trumpet as he spoke these words: but when he added under his breath "It's all in Plato, all in Plato: bless me, what do they teach them at these schools!" the older ones laughed. It was so exactly like the sort of thing they had heard him say long ago in that other world where his beard was grey instead of golden. He knew why they were laughing and joined in the laugh himself. But very quickly they all became grave again: for, as you know, there is a kind of happiness and wonder that makes you serious. It is too good to waste on jokes. It is as hard to explain how this sunlit land was different from the old Narnia as it would be to tell you how the fruits of that country taste. Perhaps you will get some idea of it if you think like this. You may have been in a room in which there was a window that looked out on a lovely bay of the sea or a green valley that wound away among mountains. And in the wall of that room opposite to the window there may have been a lookingglass. And as you turned away from the window you suddenly caught sight of that sea or that valley, all over again, in the looking glass. And the sea in the mirror, or the valley in the mirror, were in one sense just the same as the real ones: yet at the same time they were somehow different - deeper, more wonderful, more like places in a story: in a story you have never heard but very much want to know. The difference between the old Narnia and the new Narnia was like that. The new one was a deeper country: every rock and flower and blade of grass looked as if it meant more. I can't describe it any better than that: if ever you get there you will know what I mean. It was the Unicorn who summed up what everyone was feeling. He stamped his right fore-hoof on the ground and neighed, and then cried: "I have come home at last! This is my real country! I belong here. This is the land I have been looking for all my life, though I never knew it till now. The reason why we loved the old Narnia is that it sometimes looked a little like this. Bree-hee-hee! Come further up, come further in!" He shook his mane and sprang forward into a great gallop - a Unicorn's gallop, which, in our world, would have carried him out of sight in a few moments. But now a most strange thing happened. Everyone else began to run, and they found, to their astonishment, that they could keep up with him: not only the Dogs and the humans but even fat little Puzzle and short-legged Poggin the Dwarf. The air flew in their faces as if they were driving fast in a car without a windscreen. The country flew past as if they were seeing it from the windows of an express train. Faster and faster they raced, but no one got hot or tired or out of breath.