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alinawritess · 5 months ago

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𝐓𝐡𝐞 𝐅𝐥𝐢𝐜𝐤𝐞𝐫 𝐨𝐟 𝐎𝐥𝐝 𝐅𝐥𝐚𝐦𝐞𝐬 ❀ | Matt's POV

Read: The Flicker of Old Flames- down below;

❀ 𝐩𝐚𝐢𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐠. Vinnie Hacker x fem!reader x Matt Sturniolo

❀ 𝐬𝐲𝐧𝐨𝐩𝐬𝐢𝐬. Matt learns about your past with Vinnie, a former flame. During a social gathering, Matt overhears a conversation that inadvertently reveals to your high school relationship, sparking jealousy and insecurity. As tensions escalate, Matt confronts you, leading to a heated exchange where emotions run high.

❀ 𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐝 𝐜𝐨𝐮𝐧𝐭. 4.2k

❀ 𝐰𝐚𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠(𝐬). Emotional Turmoil ┆︎ Jealousy ┆︎ Miscommunication ┆︎ Relationship Tension ┆︎ Public Argument ┆︎ Regret ┆︎ Insecurity ┆︎ Emotional Distress ┆︎ No Use of Y/N.

❀ 𝐚𝐮𝐭𝐡𝐨𝐫𝐬 𝐧𝐨𝐭𝐞. Thank you for joining this emotional journey. Now, as you reflect on the choices ahead, the allure of two paths beckons: one leading to the familiarity of Vinnie, a bond rooted in shared history and lingering feelings; the other, the promise of growth and renewed understanding with Matt.

Matt sat down next to you on the balcony, his arm still around your shoulders, the gentle hum of distant conversations from the party filling the air. His eyes followed Vinnie as he walked away, a slight frown creasing his brow. He leaned in close to you, his voice barely above a whisper, tinged with a hint of jealousy. "So, you and Vinnie seem pretty close, huh?"

You froze momentarily, a flicker of panic crossing your face as you realized your slip-up. You had inadvertently revealed that you and Vinnie had dated in high school, something you hadn't disclosed to Matt before. The mention of private school added another layer of confusion to the mix.

Matt's eyes widened in surprise, the revelation catching him off guard. He had always assumed that Vinnie was just a close friend based on the context you had previously given. Hurt and curiosity mingled in his expression as he struggled to maintain a neutral tone. "A high school relationship, huh? You never mentioned that," he said, his gaze searching your face for any sign of deception. "And private school too? That's unexpected."

You took a deep breath, unsure of how to explain without escalating into another argument. "Maybe we should talk about this later, when we're alone," you suggested, glancing around cautiously. The last thing you wanted was another late-night argument, especially after the four you had already endured this week.

Matt sighed in frustration, running a hand through his hair as he sensed the conversation slipping away. "Later? Like, when exactly?" His tone carried a hint of sarcasm, frustration simmering beneath the surface. The tension between you had been building, and he dreaded the prospect of postponing yet another important discussion.

"I dunno, maybe when we get back to our place," you replied vaguely, avoiding his gaze. You knew your response wasn't satisfying him, but you also weren't ready to delve into the complexities of your past with Vinnie in the midst of a social gathering.

Matt's irritation flared as he heard your evasion. He understood the need for privacy but felt that waiting would only exacerbate the tension. His grip on your arm tightened slightly as he stopped you from walking away. "No, we're not done talking about this," he asserted gently but firmly.

Turning to face you fully, Matt's expression softened with a mix of hurt and frustration. "Why not now? We're alone now," he pleaded, his voice tinged with vulnerability. He desperately wanted clarity, to understand the dynamics of your relationship with Vinnie and how it might affect your relationship with him.

"Just because we're alone on the balcony right now doesn't mean there isn't still a party going on inside," you pointed out, gesturing toward the sounds of laughter and music drifting from the apartment. The reminder of the ongoing festivities highlighted the challenge of finding a private moment to discuss such sensitive matters.

Frustration knotted in Matt's stomach as he acknowledged the truth in your words. He knew you were right, but he couldn't bear the thought of delaying the conversation further. His grip softened as he released your arm, his mind racing with conflicting emotions.

"We always put these conversations off," he said quietly, his eyes pleading with yours for understanding. "And every time we do, it just leads to more tension and arguments. Can't we just talk about this now, here, instead of waiting until we're in the car or at home?"

You hesitated, torn between wanting to resolve the issue and not wanting to spoil the evening further. But seeing the earnestness in Matt's eyes, you nodded reluctantly. "Fine, what do you want to ask?" you relented, a sigh escaping your lips as you braced yourself for the inevitable.

Matt took a deep breath, steadying himself before broaching the sensitive topic. He sought reassurance and clarity, wanting to alleviate the doubts gnawing at his mind. Still holding onto your arm gently, he looked into your eyes, his own reflecting a mix of insecurity and determination.

"I want to understand about you and Vinnie," he began carefully. "You never told me you dated in high school. And the fact that you went to a private school... It caught me off guard," he admitted, his voice tinged with vulnerability.

Your gaze softened as you met his eyes, realizing the impact of your past on his present feelings. "His school was just a few blocks from mine," you explained softly, feeling the weight of the unspoken history between you and Vinnie. "And I didn't lie about going to an all-girls private school."

You took a deep breath, trying to articulate the complexities of your past relationship with Vinnie. "We met through mutual friends and... we developed a connection. It was special, but... life took us in different directions," you continued, the memories of your shared history with Vinnie lingering in your voice.

Matt listened intently, his expression shifting as he pieced together the puzzle of your past. His mind flashed back to his conversation with Vinnie earlier that night, the brief exchange that had stirred his insecurities.

Earlier that night:

Matt had turned to Vinnie casually, trying to gauge his relationship with you. "So, have you found yourself a special someone yet, Vinnie?" he had asked, trying to sound nonchalant despite the gnawing curiosity.

Vinnie's reaction had been telling, a mix of awkwardness and guardedness as he glanced at you and then back at Matt. "Nah, not yet," he had replied with a forced casualness, running a hand through his hair. "Haven't found the right one, I guess."

Matt had sensed the weight behind Vinnie's words, the unspoken acknowledgment of a past that still held significance. "Ever did?" he had probed further, unable to ignore the undercurrent of emotions in the conversation.

Vinnie had hesitated briefly, his gaze meeting yours for a fleeting moment before he turned back to Matt. "Once," he had admitted quietly, the admission laden with unspoken regret. "But it didn't work out."

Matt had felt a pang of jealousy and insecurity at Vinnie's words, the realization sinking in that you and Vinnie shared a history that went beyond friendship. He had wanted to probe further, to understand the depth of your past connection with Vinnie, but the arrival of other guests had interrupted their conversation.

Back on the balcony, Matt's thoughts raced as he processed your explanation. The pieces of the puzzle were falling into place, revealing a picture he hadn't fully comprehended until now.

As Matt processed the events of the evening, his thoughts kept circling back to his conversation with Vinnie earlier that night. The casual mention of someone special, Vinnie's inadvertent glance in your direction, and the raw honesty in Vinnie's confession all played like a broken record in Matt's mind.

He clenched his jaw, feeling the pieces of the puzzle slowly fall into place. The intensity of his emotions surged as he tightened his grip on your arm, torn between jealousy, insecurity, and a desperate need for clarity. Despite his internal turmoil, he tried to keep his voice steady as he posed the question that had been weighing heavily on his mind.

"Do you still have feelings for him?" The words hung in the air, heavy with vulnerability and fear. Matt's outburst was a manifestation of his own insecurities, driven by the fear of losing you to someone from your past.

His grip on your arm was firm, too firm, and he felt a pang of regret as he saw you flinch in pain. Tears welled up in your eyes, reflecting the hurt caused by his impulsive question. Despite the shaky whisper of "no" that escaped your lips, the doubt persisted, lingering in the tense silence between them.

Realizing the impact of his actions, Matt slowly released your arm, his own guilt and remorse washing over him like a tidal wave. He looked at you, the sight of tears he had caused stinging his conscience. The guilt outweighed any relief he might have felt from your denial.

His heart sank further as he noticed the red marks on your arm, physical evidence of his momentary loss of control. Matt hesitated, his hand hovering over the spot he had grasped, unsure whether his touch would comfort or cause more pain. He wanted to reach out, to apologize and make amends, but words failed him in that moment of emotional turmoil.

As bystanders began to notice the commotion, Matt's embarrassment deepened. He felt exposed, acutely aware of the eyes fixed upon them. The shame of his impulsive behavior gnawed at him, and he struggled to regain his composure amidst the growing scrutiny.

Meanwhile, you took charge of the situation with remarkable composure. Your smile, though strained, reassured the onlookers that everything was under control. You deflected their concerns with a casual explanation, dismissing the incident as a simple stumble that had resulted in a minor injury. Your ability to maintain the façade of a perfect relationship, despite the turmoil inside, both impressed and troubled Matt.

Matt's heart clenched painfully as he watched you calmly handle the concerns of the onlookers, your smile strained under the weight of the crumbling facade of your once-perfect relationship. He stood by, guilt weighing heavily on his shoulders, struggling to find the right words to express his remorse.

The red marks on your arm where his grip had been too tight seemed to throb with accusation, amplifying his feelings of self-loathing and regret. He knew he needed to apologize, but the words caught in his throat, choked by the intensity of his emotions.

"Let's go to the car. I want to go home," you said, your voice carrying a hint of exhaustion and disappointment. Matt nodded silently, relieved yet anxious to follow your lead, eager to escape the scene and the scrutinizing gazes of strangers.

The walk to the car was a silent ordeal, each step echoing with the unspoken tension between them. Matt stole occasional glances at you, his gaze lingering on the marks he had left on your arm, a stark reminder of his impulsive behavior and the pain he had caused.

Reaching the car, Matt mechanically opened the passenger door for you, moving around to the driver's side with a heaviness in his movements. He slid into the driver's seat, gripping the steering wheel tightly as he battled with his inner turmoil and the weight of his actions.

The car was filled with suffocating silence, thick with the tension and unspoken apologies. Matt's eyes flickered between you and the road ahead, his mind racing with a thousand apologies he couldn't vocalize.

You looked out of the window, breaking the silence with a voice that felt distant and cold. "Are there any other questions you need answered?"

Matt's heart sank further at the coldness in your tone, the distance evident in your words. He longed to bridge the gap between you, to apologize and ask for forgiveness, but the chasm seemed insurmountable in that moment.

"No," he managed to reply, his voice strained with regret. His eyes remained fixed on the road ahead, the weight of his mistakes heavy on his shoulders.

Silence enveloped them once more, the hum of the engine and the passing traffic filling the void left by their unspoken words.

"Actually, tonight I need some time alone. Can you drop me off at my apartment, not yours?" you requested, your voice carrying a hint of vulnerability beneath the detachment.

Matt felt a pang of hurt at your request to be taken to your own apartment, not his. It was a stark reminder of the distance that had grown between them in a matter of moments. Gripping the steering wheel tighter, he swallowed the lump in his throat. "Of course," he replied quietly, his voice barely audible. "I'll drop you off at your apartment."

The drive felt endless, each passing minute stretching the emotional divide between them. Matt parked the car outside your apartment building, his hands still gripping the steering wheel as if holding onto the last shreds of hope.

Turning to you, he searched your face for any sign of forgiveness or connection, but found only guardedness. Taking a deep breath, he forced himself to speak. "We're here," he murmured, his voice thick with heartache.

"Thanks," you replied curtly, avoiding his gaze.

Matt's heart sank at your distant response, the pain of his actions cutting deeper. He wanted to reach out, to apologize and ask for forgiveness, but the words stuck in his throat.

"You're welcome," he managed to say, his voice barely audible. He hesitated, torn between wanting to say more and fearing to worsen the situation.

He watched silently as you unbuckled your seatbelt, each click of the buckle echoing in the strained silence of the car. Matt's hand twitched involuntarily, a desperate urge to stop you, to pull you back and make things right, but he knew he had already crossed a line he couldn't erase.

Opening the car door, you stepped out into the chilly night air, leaving Matt behind with a whirlwind of emotions. He sat there, feeling helpless and lost, watching you disappear into the building without a backward glance.

The door closed softly, sealing their separation with a finality that echoed in Matt's ears. He remained in the car, his forehead resting against the steering wheel as he struggled to contain the flood of emotions threatening to overwhelm him.

Regret, guilt, and a deep sense of sorrow washed over him as he replayed the events of the evening in his mind. He had hurt you, both physically and emotionally, and now he was paying the price for his impulsive actions and insecurities.

As Matt watched you disappear into the building, the door closing softly behind you, it resonated in his mind like the finality of a verdict. The silence inside the car amplified the pain and regret flooding his heart. Every fiber of his being urged him to follow you, to plead for forgiveness, but he knew deep down that it was too late.

Bowing his head, Matt rested his forehead against the steering wheel, grappling with a tumultuous mix of helplessness and desperation. The weight of knowing he had caused you physical and emotional pain burdened his conscience. He replayed the scene repeatedly in his mind's eye—the red marks on your arm, your strained smile amidst the concerned onlookers, and the distant, cold gaze you fixed on him when you asked to be taken to your apartment instead of his.

Sadness washed over Matt, intertwined with frustration at himself for succumbing to his impulsive behavior. He desperately wanted to undo his actions, to mend the rift he had unwittingly created between them, but the damage had been irreversibly done.

Night had fallen, enveloping the city outside in darkness that mirrored the turmoil within him. Alone in the car, Matt wrestled with regrets and unanswered questions. He knew he had to confront the situation, to apologize and seek reconciliation, but the thought of further pushing you away paralyzed him with fear. You had asked for space, for solitude in your own apartment instead of his, and he respected that request even as it tore at his heart.

Returning to his apartment felt both comforting and agonizing. Everywhere he turned, reminders of you lingered—your clothes in the closet, your toiletries in the bathroom, the everyday items that had become intertwined with memories of shared moments. What had once felt like a sanctuary now echoed with emptiness in your absence.

In your shared bedroom, Matt's eyes fell upon your diary resting innocuously on the counter. Normally, he would never consider invading your privacy, but tonight, consumed by remorse and a desperate need for understanding, he hesitated. Curiosity gnawed at him, whispering that perhaps within those pages lay the key to comprehending your thoughts and feelings.

The entry had begun with the heaviness of a difficult decision weighing on your shoulders. Coming home after a long day of filming, you couldn't evade the inevitable conversation with Vinnie any longer. Despite your exhaustion, his warm smile welcomed you home, momentarily lifting your spirits in the comfort of shared familiarity. But beneath the surface, the tension simmered, waiting for the moment you would broach the topic that had been haunting your thoughts.

"Hi, Mr. Hacker," you teased, a feeble attempt to lighten the atmosphere with your playful nickname game. Vinnie chuckled, his laughter filling the room with a warmth that belied the impending seriousness of your conversation. It was a brief respite before reality set in.

When you finally brought up the need to talk, Matt could almost see the shift in Vinnie's expression through your words. The smile faltered, replaced by a mix of apprehension and concern. Those four simple words—"We need to talk"—carried weight that neither of you could ignore. Matt could feel the tension building as you navigated the difficult terrain of explaining how you felt the two of you were drifting apart, lost in the whirlwind of your individual pursuits.

Vinnie's reaction mirrored the pain you must have felt reading it aloud to him. His attempt to remain composed, his hands clenching into fists, and the visible effort to keep his emotions in check—all these details painted a vivid picture of a man struggling to grasp the sudden rift forming between you. Matt could almost hear the tremor in Vinnie's voice as he processed your words, hoping against hope that this was not the end.

The moment you suggested a break, Matt felt the pang of déjà vu. The air thickened with the unspoken implications of your words, and Vinnie's reaction was a heart-wrenching mix of shock and desperation. Matt could almost see Vinnie's eyes searching yours for reassurance, for a glimmer of hope that this was just a misunderstanding, a momentary lapse in the otherwise strong bond you had shared.

"Yeah," you had said, your voice betraying the ache in your heart. "Maybe we need time apart to figure things out."

The weight of those words hung heavy between you, a palpable silence pregnant with the uncertainty of what lay ahead. Matt imagined Vinnie's pain, his voice thick with emotion as he questioned the future of your relationship, searching desperately for a lifeline to hold onto amidst the storm.

"I don't know, Vinnie," you admitted, tears threatening to spill over despite your resolve to stay strong. "I don't know what the future holds."

Matt could almost hear the echo of your uncertainty in his own voice now. The struggles you faced with Vinnie mirrored the doubts and fears that had crept into your relationship with him. The desire to chase dreams without feeling constrained was a sentiment Matt understood, but he felt a pang of guilt knowing he might have inadvertently pushed you away in the same manner.

"We can't change the past," Vinnie had murmured, his words a resignation that cut deep into your heart. "But is there no way we can salvage our future?"

The poignancy of Vinnie's plea resonated with Matt as he read, feeling the weight of your shared history and the pain of letting go. He sensed your inner conflict, torn between holding onto the love you had cherished for so long and the daunting prospect of an uncertain future.

"I wish we could've found everything together," Vinnie had whispered, his voice cracking with the weight of unspoken regrets.

Those words struck Matt to the core. The longing for a future once imagined together, now slipping through your fingers, mirrored the ache he felt in his own heart. He understood now the depth of your love for Vinnie, the pain of letting go, and the fear that perhaps this decision would define your lives forever.

Matt sat in the quiet of the apartment, the diary entry in his hands trembling slightly as he read through your words. It was a recent entry, detailing the complexities and uncertainties of your relationship with him. Each sentence painted a vivid picture of your inner turmoil and the doubts that had been gnawing at you.

"It's been almost two years since Matt and I got together," you had written, the words a stark reminder of the time that had passed since your relationship began. Matt couldn't help but feel a pang of anxiety as he continued reading, knowing that these words were a window into your deepest thoughts.

You described how the recent fights between you seemed to escalate, leaving you emotionally drained and questioning the authenticity of your connection. The conflicts had become the fuel for your music, a painful outlet that spoke volumes about the impact these disagreements had on you.

"I hate how every argument leaves me in tears," you had confessed, your vulnerability laid bare on the page. Matt's heart sank as he realized the extent of your emotional turmoil, contrasting sharply with his own apparent detachment from the conflicts.

The diary entry revealed your struggle with feeling like an accessory in Matt's life rather than an equal partner. You questioned whether the moments he showcased you to others were the only times you truly felt valued, a sentiment that struck Matt deeply.

Reading about your conflicted feelings towards him, Matt felt a wave of remorse wash over him. He had been oblivious to the weight of your emotions, assuming wrongly that everything was fine between the two of you. The realization that you had been feeling this way for some time shook him to the core.

He read on, each sentence heavy with the weight of your uncertainties and desires. You admitted that despite the turmoil, you loved him—or at least, you thought you did. The genuine moments you shared together were a lifeline amidst the doubts, reminding you of why you had chosen to be with him in the first place.

Matt couldn't help but feel a mixture of guilt and sadness as he processed your words. He saw how you missed the simple joys of watching anime with Vinnie, a reminder of the uncomplicated happiness you had once known. The fact that Matt couldn't share that particular interest with you left a bitter taste of inadequacy in his mouth.

Matt's heart sank as he read the diary entry about him, each word cutting deeper than the last. The lines painted a painful picture of uncertainty and doubt within your relationship—words he hadn't expected to encounter. It was a stark realization that you had been struggling, feeling like an accessory rather than a cherished partner. The weight of your tears after arguments contrasted sharply with his peaceful sleep, oblivious to the turmoil you were enduring.

A wave of remorse washed over Matt as he continued reading, his heart heavy with the knowledge of how he had unintentionally made you feel. He had taken your love for granted, focusing more on his own accomplishments than on nurturing your emotional connection. Seeing it laid out in your own words made it impossible to deny the truth of your feelings.

Yet, amidst the pain and doubt, Matt could still feel the love you held for him. He knew the moments you cherished—the genuine times spent watching movies, making YouTube videos, and cooking together. But he also couldn't ignore your longing for the simplicity and ease you once shared with Vinnie, a stark reminder of how he might never measure up to that ideal.

Reading the final lines about your hope for your love to grow and for both of you to navigate through challenges, Matt's heart ached. He knew he hadn't been the partner you deserved. He hadn't made you feel truly loved and understood, and he couldn't bear the weight of that realization.

Closing the diary gently, Matt felt a mix of guilt, sadness, and determination wash over him. He knew he needed to make things right, to address the issues that had been eroding your relationship. The diary entry had exposed the cracks, and now it was up to him to repair them—to show you how much you meant to him and to rebuild the trust he had inadvertently shattered.

As he sat in the quiet of the apartment, grappling with his own shortcomings and the weight of your struggles, Matt's eyes fell upon your favorite plushie—the Cinnamoroll plushie you always held close. Taking it in his hands, he noticed something he hadn't before—the tag was still on, and there was a note attached.

"Happy birthday – Vinnie ❤️"

Matt's eyes widened as he read the note. Vinnie had given you this plushie on your birthday, a simple yet heartfelt gesture that spoke volumes about the bond you once shared. Holding the plushie now, Matt felt a strange mix of emotions—jealousy, sadness, but also a twinge of understanding. It wasn't just about the plushie; it was a symbol of your past with Vinnie, a connection that Matt couldn't erase.

Setting the plushie gently on the bed, Matt let out a weary sigh. The events of the day had taken a toll on him, leaving him emotionally drained and unsure of how to navigate the complexities of your relationship. Closing his eyes, he held onto the plushie for comfort, feeling the soft fabric against his skin—a familiar sensation that now carried a sense of nostalgia and longing.

Tomorrow would bring new challenges, but tonight, Matt made a silent promise to himself. He would confront his own insecurities and shortcomings. He would find a way to make you feel loved, valued, and understood—no matter how difficult the journey ahead might be.

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