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a-small-batch-of-dragons · 3 years ago

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I'm Okay (Sure)

Prompts: hi there! may i request some loceit angst for the soul? - anon

oh my goodness all your writing is so good!!!! i was wondering if you could write some loceit hurt comfort? preferably with Logan hurting? -anon

Hey I’m back with another print cause the last time I did that I sobbed for 30 minutes and I loved it. Anygay...Can you write a fic where Roman or Logan somehow end up thinking their worth is hinged on their ability to produce good work and what they are able to just take? Then Janus hears them saying they are okay and then tries to help? - anon

Listen lately there have been too many of these prompts that go 'hey *sucker-punch*' SO

We're fine. Everything's fine. Everything is so fine right now. Everything is so fine and good in the way that it's happening.

Read on Ao3

Warnings: none

Pairings: LAMP, DLAMP, DLAMPR, can be platonic or romantic you decide

Word Count: 2198

There aren’t enough lies in the world to drown out the words that strike into Janus’s head.

I’m okay.

Janus frowns, setting his book down and glaring at the ceiling. As if he can glare the words away from the mouth of who just spoke them. But nothing changes. The curl at the back of his throat doesn’t vanish. The hiss still slides out of his mouth. He sighs and stands, sinking out to go find today’s pretty little liar.

He isn’t surprised when he strides out of the shadows next to a desk brimming with overstuffed notebooks and a box of tissues. He suppresses a sigh as he sees the door and folds his hands patiently. A few moments later, the door opens and Logan steps through, stopping when he sees Janus. Janus raises an eyebrow.

“Janus?” Logan glances over his shoulder. “How can I help you?”

Janus just hisses.

“I don’t know what that means,” Logan sighs, coming in the close the door, ��just tell me what you want.”

He hisses again, drawing it out this time.

“Janus, I don’t know why you’re here.”

He sighs. The next hiss has his tongue flicking out through his teeth. Logan winces.

“Come here,” Janus murmurs, holding his hand out, “and I won’t let Patton see me.”

Logan winces again. “Did you hear both of us?”

“Just you,” Janus smirks. “Gotcha.”

“Well played,” Logan mutters, even as he walks across the room. “Now what do you want?”

He raises his eyebrows. “It’s certainly not that I’m concerned that you’re lying about being okay.”

“Janus,” he sighs, “how many times a day do you say the words ‘I’m fine?’ It’s not something to worry about.”

He narrows his eyes. “One of us is called ‘Deceit,’ my dear Logan, and one of us is not.”

“But—“

“Logan,” Janus calls softly, “don’t lie.”

For a moment, he thinks it might work. Then Logan presses his lips together and folds his hands.

“Not saying anything counts as a lie of omission here,” Janus sighs, “work with me.”

Logan says nothing. His gaze drops to a spot on the floor.

“…don’t make me do this,” Janus whispers.

Still nothing.

Oh, Logan, why so stubborn?

“You just came from baking with Patton,” Janus says softly, “there’s still flour on your tie.”

Logan’s face twitches once.

“You promised that you would stay the whole night this time,” he continues, tilting his head slightly, “but you didn’t. You only leave when you’ve given a proper explanation, because you think it’s rude otherwise.”

He starts walking in a slow circle.

“But you didn’t—Patton followed you up here.” He casts a glance at the door. “Which means that you just…left.”

He stops, right behind him, watching the line of his back tense.

“Now, what would send our dear, darling nerd running for cover?”

He doesn’t miss the way Logan tries not to flinch.

“Was it something wrong with the baking? No, no, you’ve left your sleeves rolled a little—“ he reaches out to tap the fabric— “so you left in a hurry.”

“Enough,” comes the very quiet whisper.

“Your collar is still crooked,” Janus continues as he walks, “so you must’ve frozen in the middle of adjusting your tie.”

“Stop.” Still a whisper.

“And you’ve still got ink stains on your hands—“ he points— “which means you’ve not been paying attention for a while. Your focus is elsewhere.”

“Stop it.” Not quite a whisper.

“You were good enough to fool Patton,” Janus says, finishing the circle, “but sloppy. Too sloppy. The quality of your—“

“Stop!”

Logan moves in the blink of an eye, reaching out to shove himself away from Janus but he’s too slow. Janus has him by the forearms before he can react. He trembles in Janus’s hold as two more hands come up to fix the glasses on his nose.

“And,” Janus murmurs, his voice as soft as he can make it as he tilts Logan’s chin up to make sure the glasses are in place, “you’ve let me rile you up like this.”

He takes Logan’s face firmly in his hands.

“What’s the matter, sweetie?”

Logan’s mouth trembles. “It’s nothing.”

“Sweetie…”

“It is,” Logan protests stubbornly, “and that’s the problem.”

Janus frowns, gentling his grip on Logan’s arms and looping them around his neck. “What’s the problem, what’s made you so upset?”

“It’s nothing,” Logan says again, closing his eyes, “and I can’t—they—the problem is not something, it is the absence of something that is causing the issue.”

Janus makes a noise of understanding, letting Logan pull back enough to clean his glasses and straighten his tie. “And what is it that you wanted there to be?”

Logan huffs, still not making eye contact. “Something. Anything. I…it…my work.”

“What about your work?” Janus tips his head up. “Logan, you can talk to me. You don’t have to put all of this on.”

“I know,” he mumbles, “but that’s what I have to do for everyone else.”

“That’s not…” Janus trails off. “Who told you that?”

“What?”

“Who told you that,” he repeats, thing a step closer, “who told you that you have to sit there and take it? To put up the front of nothing hurting you?”

Logan just looks at him. Janus bites back a snarl and tugs Logan in for a proper hug.

“You’re not just Logic, sweetie,” he whispers, rubbing his back, “you’re Logan. And you’re allowed to have feelings.”

Logan’s head bows into Janus’s shoulder and for a moment, he thinks Logan’s going to choke out a sob or at least relax.

Instead, Logan tenses. “No, I can’t.”

And pulls away.

“I have to work,” he insists, already putting the facade back together, piece by piece, “and as such, I must focus. You are correct in pointing out that I have allowed my focus to drift, thus I must get it back. Thank you for correcting my error.”

He motions to the desk.

“Now, if you will excuse me, I’d better get back to work.”

He frowns when Janus is silent.

“Janus? Are you alright?”

Yes. Absolutely. Undeniably. He’s fine.

Because every single word that just came out of Logan’s mouth is fine. It makes complete sense. It implies a perfectly healthy relationship between Logan and his work. It ensures that Logan takes care of himself and that he knows he is supported.

“Logan,” Janus says softly, “I’m going to ask you a question.”

Logan blinks. “Alright.”

“Please don’t lie to me.”

“I believe we have established that we are unable to lie successfully to you.”

That’s never stopped you from trying before.

Janus takes a deep breath. “Do you believe that your value and importance to us is based on the work that you are able to produce?”

Logan frowns. “Isn’t it?”

Janus’s heart breaks.

“Do you think,” he says instead, reaching out to take one of Logan’s hands, “Patton would’ve followed you up here if he were just concerned about your work?”

Logan frowns. “No, but that’s different.”

“Do you think Virgil would make a point of asking you whether or not you’re comfortable at scheduled times throughout movie nights if he were primarily focused on the work you produce?”

“No, but—“

“Do you think Remus,” Janus continues, raising his voice a little, “would sink into your room as often as he does because he wants to make sure you take breaks if he were only thinking about what work you were doing instead of taking a break?”

“N-no.”

“Do you think Roman purposefully takes you on walks in the Imagination, to drag you away from your work, do you think he would do that if he only wanted to spend time with you because of what work you do?”

Logan shakes his head wordlessly, looking away. Janus lets out a soft noise before he reaches out. This time he doesn’t even have to touch Logan’s chin before he looks back.

“Do you think that I would be here with you right now,” he murmurs, “if I didn’t care about you?”

There’s the sob he’s been expecting, choked out behind a hand quickly clapped to his mouth as Janus pulls him back in for a hug. He takes off Logan’s glasses and sets them on the table, crooning softly as he wraps the poor thing up in his arms and takes them to the bed.

“We care about you, sweetie,” he whispers, running his fingers through Logan’s hair, “not your work, you. We care about your work because it’s yours. Don’t forget that.”

Logan tries to pull back and say something only for his tie to get caught between them. Janus shushes him gently and snaps his fingers, changing them both into something softer. He tucks a hand around the back of Logan’s neck and coaxes him to breathe, come on sweetie, it’s alright.

“I don’t know if I can do that,” Logan manages after a moment, wiping his face, “if I can—can believe that. J-just like that.”

“That’s okay, sweetie,” Janus murmurs, “but you try for me, okay?”

Logan still looks unconvinced. Janus raises an eyebrow.

“Would it be easier to hear from everyone else?”

“They wouldn’t say it.”

“…oh, sweetie, let me call them in here and prove you wrong.”

Logan just huffs. “You can try, I guess.”

Janus raises his voice and calls out: “Logan’s upset!”

They barely have time to blink before Remus has sunk right on top of them.

“Hey, Lolo,” he murmurs, voice soft enough to make Logan whimper and Janus chuckle, “you okay? When’s the last time you had a break?”

Virgil appears before Logan can answer, tucking himself behind Remus and tugging slightly at his collar. “Get off, Remus, we don’t know if he’s okay with physical contact right now.”

Remus grumbles but listens, shuffling back to give Logan breathing room. Virgil’s face softens when he sees Logan’s face.

“Hey, L, what’s up? You okay? Bad patch?”

Before Logan can answer, there’s a knock on the door.

“Hello? Can we come in, kiddo?”

“It’s open,” Janus calls, only for Patton and Roman to bustle in, Patton cooing and rushing to take Logan into his arms at the evidence of tears.

“Oh, sweetheart, what’s the matter? I’m right here, it’s okay now, you’ll be alright.”

He hears Virgil mutter something about asking first before his attention turns to Roman. Roman raises an eyebrow at Janus, making his way over and bending down to ask, concerned: “what’s wrong? Did he tell you? Were you here when it started?”

Janus glances back at Logan, only for Logan’s gaze to land on Roman and his eyes widen.

“Hey, hey, Specs,” Roman hushes, raising his hands and doing his best to look non-threatening, “what’s that look for? Are you alright?”

“I’m—I’m sorry,” Logan stammers, “I—I’m not done yet, I can’t—we—I—“

“Oh, Logan, I don’t care about the work—“ yes, Roman— “I’m worried about you. Tell us what’s wrong, let us help.”

Logan hasn’t processed anything past ‘I don’t care about the work,’ it seems, judging by the way his breathing almost stops.

“Y-you…you what?”

As Roman’s head tilts in confusion, Janus speaks up.

“Our dear darling nerd is under the impression that we base his value on the work that he is able to produce,” he says softly, “and not that we care about him.”

Logan’s eyes well up with tears as cries of shock and immediate reassurances fill the room. Patton and Remus, it seems, can’t be held back anymore and all but launch themselves at the poor thing, cuddling him between them like some great teddy bear. Virgil carefully takes Logan’s glasses and passes them to Roman before snuggling in beside Logan’s head. Roman carefully tidies Logan’s desk—and oh, the prince knows exactly how Logan likes his desk organized, does he, how interesting—before nudging Janus’s arm so they both sit on the bed proper.

“Oh,” Logan mumbles, lost underneath the Patton-Remus-Virgil at the other end of the bed, “oh.”

“Yes, sweetie, oh.” Janus chuckles as Logan’s arms come up to shyly hug the others.

“There really are so many self-worth issues around here,” Roman mutters, “aren’t there?”

Janus hums, obliging as Logan reaches out for both of them. “We can help with those, won’t we?”

“Of course.”

Only later, when they’re all about to doze off, still in a pile, does Janus realize that he may not have been able to glare them away, but the lie is completely gone from Logan’s mouth.

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#dragonbabbles #sanders sides #fic #lamp #dlamp #dlampr #logan sanders #logan angst #janus sanders #deceit sanders #sympathetic deceit #remus sanders #sympathetic remus #patton sanders #virgil sanders

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clearlynotjanus · 3 years ago

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Loceit Appreciation Week: Day One, Hobbies

READ ON AO3

Chapter Summary: Through three accidental bonding moments over their usually solo hobbies, Logan & Janus realize they have a bit in common & enjoy what the other has to offer.

CW: Food mention, NSFW insinuated very briefly, Greek mythology Word Count: 6497 Genre: Gen Rating: Gen Ships: Slowburn Loceit, slowburn Intruloceit, pre-established Intrulogical, pre-established Dukeceit

taglist: @sanderssidesangsttrash @catalinaacosta @whatishappeningrightnow @anxiousbean4404 @vexelore @the-dead-and-the-decaying @serpentinesomebody @poptartsaysurloved @robertdownerjr @dangitsbrightinhere @iamuncomffy @sanderdarksides @evertriedsoywithyourpopcorn @dragonfander @virgilstarantula @a-rudethude @indubitably-emo @gay-artist-626 @cosplayhanna @edupunkn00b @wouldntyou-liketoknow @awesomerandomgirl1 @loceitweek2021

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Without any effort made to conceal himself, Janus observed Logan and Remus from the kitchen pass through. Cynically his eyes measured the almost formal distance between the lovers on the couch. There was no need to guesstimate their familiarity; Remus gushed every chance he got about their private life but Janus was still nosey as ever. He leaned forward there with an elbow bent across the counter, the other propped up with an apple brought to his mouth every so often with a satisfying crunch. His gaze switched between keen on their movements and hazy as trains of thought whisked him away.

Janus was aware his staring made Logan uncomfortable in these moments. He shifted, glanced in Janus’ direction, cleared his throat, pushed his glasses back unnecessarily, all as though being perceived so closely was an entirely new concept; but that was just another reason to continue. This was, after all, the Dark Side; his side, and far be it from Janus to let Logan forget that detail. Besides, it wasn’t like he was a peeping Tom, leering as their casual afternoon became intimate. No, whenever that occurred, Janus was out of the room faster than Remus could get it up.

Today was tedious in its domesticity. Remus scribbled like a madman with furious scritchscritchscritches in a notebook that seemed to change positions whenever Janus looked at him, specifically. Logan rested his head gently against a loosely balled fist. With a quiet schwiff every couple of minutes, he turned a page of the book in his lap. The room was silent otherwise.

Crunch. Schwiff. Scritchscritchscritch. Crunch. Schwiff. Scritchscritchscritch. Crunch -- The apple was finished and the sticky core was disposed of.

“Logan,” Janus called suddenly in a sweet tone as the trash’s lid closed.

The Side in question stayed silent; either to finish the line his eyes were currently on or to give Janus a taste of his own uncomfortable medicine. Either way, Janus rounded the kitchen corner and balanced a hip against the arm rest next to Remus. A gloved hand idly found its way into his partner’s curls; thoughtlessly, Remus leaned into the feeling, but remained otherwise unresponsive, clearly content with his scribbling. Logan finally blinked up. His expression seemed indecisive between exasperated and dubious, with a predictable amount of disinterest.

“What is it you’re reading?” Janus asked, brows and chin raised with an amount of intrigue that Logan didn’t immediately trust. Not to say Logan didn’t trust Janus individually, but even if he was the Side who understood Deceit the best, there was still quite a bit of water under this particular bridge -- or, uh, whatever idiom would fit here.

Instead of responding verbally, Logan held up the blue and black cover for Janus to read himself; which he then did. With a slightly cocked head, the words were enunciated slowly.

“Born Under Saturn. The Character and Conduct of Artists; A Documented History From Antiquity to The French Revolution,” Janus blinked back up at Logan’s face, digesting the rather wordy sentence. “An analysis of historical artists?” He attempted to boil the topic down to something more … succinct as Logan lowered the book again.

“Basically,” He allowed, eyes poised to resume his reading.

Janus hummed with peaked interest and continued to watch as Logan’s demeanor receded from vaguely conversational to studiously mute once more. In truth, it sounded like a rather compelling read. Being Thomas’ Sides, of course, they were all inclined to art in some way; for the more left-brained Sides such as Janus and Logan however, the critique and reasoning behind the art and associated artists compelled them more frequently than the act of creating art, itself.

“What’s the part about Saturn?” Janus asked with knitted brows, the hand in Remus’ hair going still as he interrupted again after a moment. This question seemed to get Logan going as he shifted in his seat.

“Well, I had assumed from the title that the study would be centered around evidence pertaining to when and where artists were born, alluding to the hypothesis that Saturnian positions and dispositions resulted in a certain type of artistic character,” Logan explained, annoyance bleeding into his tone as he placed the back of his hand on the page he was currently on in a humorless gesture.

“And I take it from your very contented mood that that’s exactly what the book is about,” Janus teased reflexively, taken aback by Logan’s sudden enthusiasm. Perhaps, Janus thought, he hadn’t been so bothered by being stared at and was simply wrestling with his expectations of the text.

“Ha ha,” He laughed dryly; the sound made Janus smirk. “Saturn is, unfortunately,” Logan waved his hand at the book, “Just a metaphor here.”

“A metaphor for what?” Janus pressed gently, giving a final tug of affection to Remus’ hair before retracting his hand; sensing the appendage being stolen, the distracted Creativity leaned to follow the stimulus until it was far out of reach. Janus turned away and sat delicately on the shallow coffee table in front of Logan, who then paused.

He didn’t wonder why Janus was interested in this topic; after all, he thought, philosophy and theoretical debate were right up Janus’ alley. Additionally, they were speaking about metaphors, he rationalized. Logan didn’t need to understand nor regularly use the literary device to know its practical application, particularly to Deceit who always spoke in those encumbering and roundabout ways. What Logan really paused for was a moment of recognition that after years of distant silence, they were embarking on a rather cordial discussion.

“The melancholic,” Logan explained.

“So not the Roman god?”

“Well, yes and no, but for the comparison to make sense, no is easier,” Janus nodded and crossed his legs, listening with intent held in his brows. “It is a tad convoluted but the theory relates to the history of the four humors,” Janus gave a soft, one-noted hum and Logan nodded. “After all, the Greek etymology for the word melancholy is melas, meaning black and kholé meaning bile; black bile, of course--”

“Being one of the four … fluids,” Janus scrunched his nose distastefully, “Associated with the four humors,” He finished his interruption, gesturing with a loose wrist.

“Exactly,” Logan breathed with a surprised half smile.

“So what does Saturn have to do with black bile?” Janus asked reasonably.

“Well that part goes back to the interpretive study of Astrology,” Janus tilted his head with surprised interest. “Which, despite its dubious plausibility today, played a frequently understated role in the founding of modern science, especially modern psychology.” Logan paused, watching Janus’ face shift subtly in thought.

“Forgive my relatively ignorant knowledge of Astrology,” Logan nodded permissibly as Janus began to piece the theory together with slow words, “But I guess what you’re saying, or rather, what you expected the book to say, is that artists all suffer from a melancholic disposition?” Logan hummed and shook his head, causing Janus to purse his lips.

“Again, yes and no. The book is saying that, to some extent.”

“You had just been expecting the evidence to be reliant on literal Saturn rather than...whatever they’re actually using,” Janus tried again and was rewarded with another half smile.

“Are you nerds done yet?” Remus piped up suddenly as Logan opened his mouth to continue. Janus’ head turned and the awareness in his partner’s eyes made his own narrow; how long had he been attentive to their conversation? “I wanna show Lolo what I made.”

“Quite, then,” Janus smiled curtly at Remus who beamed with knowing sarcasm in a way that only Janus would be able to detect. Rat bastard. “Another time,” He promised almost provocatively as a parting to Logan, who looked rather miffed and torn between continuing this unexpectedly stimulating conversation and tending to his boyfriend’s desires.

Janus stood before brushing invisible dirt off himself. “Have a wonderful afternoon, lovebirds,” Janus lilted, fingers wiggling in a goodbye wave as his back disappeared down the hall.

Logan blinked several times before inhaling and turning to Remus, who seemed a few moments more patient and perhaps a little more amused than usual.

- - - - -

Remus’ door having gone unanswered, when music began to softly crackle from the direction of the kitchen, Logan followed it with a vague intrigue. He paused in the entry, blinking at the four black-sleeved and yellow-gloved hands that flitted about the counter spaces. They rifled through the fridge and plucked from the cabinets with a sense of mindlessness from their owner, who stood at the sink. Using his natural two arms, Janus filled various bowls with water as he hummed along to the quiet, bouncy swing song that played from an antique looking gramophone Logan could’ve sworn wasn’t there yesterday. The scene was fascinating, from a scientific point of view; he had never considered how Janus’ many arms worked and seeing them here, stretching out and acting as though they had their own sentience piqued his interest immensely.

For long moments, Logan watched silently before the arms retracted, bringing various items back to the workspace closest to Janus. Packets of gelatin, food coloring -- Logan squinted from his position; corn syrup? The answer to a question he hadn’t asked made itself apparent as he recalled a few various tidbits Remus had given him about his partner. Logan cleared his throat to get Janus’ attention, satisfied with his distant examinations.

“Oh,” The baker turned around, excess arms disappearing inside him with a flourish as they completed their purpose of fetching. “Logan, good morning,” Janus greeted in a sunny tone, though confusion hinted in his eyes.

“Good morning,” He returned, taking conservative steps into the kitchen. He nodded at the gelatin packets. “So this is the gelatin art Remus talks about,” Logan observed without question.

“Remus talks about it?” Janus asked, reserved happiness in his distracted tone as he stepped from the sink to the counter and began measuring out tablespoons of corn syrup.

“Frequently,” Logan confirmed, crossing his arms casually. The conversation came to a peaceful lull as Janus began to stir the syrup and water. Concluding that, he turned and took steps that placed him closer than usual to the other.

“What does he say?” Janus asked like a teen greedy for rumors, giving a sly glance from under his lashes as he paused. The moment lingered as he reached around Logan for the gelatin packets he stood in front of, meeting his eyes all the while. Suddenly, Logan couldn’t remember a single thing Remus had ever said. The tips of his ears reddened with a blush that creeped up the back of his neck. He swallowed against the dryness of his throat.

“Just that you enjoy making gelatin,” Logan responded after Janus had made his way back to the counter, his posture feeling as stiff and unnatural as his answer. He could see the disappointment in the way Janus’ lips pursed as he began dumping the neutral colored gelatin into the solution.

“Is that so.”

“Yes,” Logan cleared his throat and again felt that his response was lame. It made the air between them go stale. How did Remus manage to speak with Janus so casually and with so much enthusiasm? Of course, he wouldn't be Remus without an absence of shame, but still; Logan found himself envying the fact.

He was appreciative of the cheerful music that eased the awkwardness. Also that Janus didn’t seem to mind how apparently awful he was at idle conversations despite his desire to engage in them. After a few moments, Janus went back to humming as he repeated the task of pouring gelatin into the bowls and discarding the packets. As the heat in his face receded, Logan recalled more of Remus’ words over the time they had been dating.

He always spoke very highly of his partner, which was to be expected. Janus was graceful, patient, and, quote, ridiculously smart. Despite taking everything Remus had to say with mounded tablespoons of realism flavored salt, examining Janus now and through the lens of their recent interactions, Logan would have to agree.

“He has an awful habit,” Janus revived the conversation as one song faded into the next. He turned and leaned back against the counter; as he spoke, he slowly began turning the knob of a manual can opener against a can of condensed milk. “Of eating various inedible things,” Janus scrunched his nose and Logan exhaled. “You won’t believe the things he’s consumed over the years.”

“That’s why you make the gelatin, correct?” Logan asked, hoping this time his phrasing opened up the possibility for more elaboration.

“Mhm,” Janus hummed with a shallow nod and twisted the lid off before throwing it in the trash as well. He turned and stirred the thickened milk into the largest bowl of water and corn syrup. Discomfort washed over Logan once more as he began to realize the conversation had died again. His head fell but soon snapped up as Janus thankfully continued after a moment.

“Of course it doesn’t negate the problem entirely,” His tone was less annoyed than Logan would’ve thought. Though there was plenty of quiet frustration, mostly he sounded concerned and tired. “But I like to imagine it helps some at least.”

“I think it helps more than you realize,” Logan offered slowly in a tone that was sure of itself despite the confusion in his brow. Did Janus not realize his instrumental intervention?

Remus never really shut up about how much he appreciated Janus. The various ways Janus managed him and his mental health over their lifetime together, how effortless Janus made it all look; Logan had to admit, hearing about it constantly was rather intimidating, especially at the beginning of their relationship. He had high expectations to meet if everything Remus said was true, and like he thought before, it was beginning to look that way as Logan got to know Janus for himself. Remus talked a fair amount about how much he appreciated Logan as well though, so he never did have much of a chance to get demoralized about it. Even so, gauging the dynamic between Janus and Remus without his interference was a bit startling as everything came into focus.

They flowed together easily; in the interactions Logan had witnessed, their affection always had a sense of routine and familiarity, but not in the stale way that felt boring after years of repetition. Perhaps, Logan began to think, it had clouded his view a bit and prevented him from questioning if Remus ever expressed his gratitude to Janus, directly. The likelihood that he didn’t seemed infinitesimal, and yet the doubt was still clear in Janus’ words. Was it that he didn’t believe Remus then?

Janus cautioned a look at Logan from over his shoulder, surprise and then confusion flashed across his features; exactly how much did Remus talk about him? He didn’t mind being complimented of course, he adored praise, but something about the idea of Remus jumping into a new relationship only to gush about him constantly didn’t sit right with him. Especially if that person was Logan. Who knew how Logan felt after all this time? Janus scrunched his nose and tossed the now empty can with a sense of distaste.

“I suppose he talks about me too much if you think that,” His tone was apologetic as he gave the mixture a final stir before turning to meet Logan’s eyes with a flashy smile. “Enough about all that though; would you like to help?”

Logan blinked, his mind catching up to the topic dismissal. “Help?” He repeated automatically before realizing what Janus meant. “Oh. No,” He unfolded his arms to wave a hand, shaking his head. “I’m not one for baking, I’ll just get in the way.”

“Nonsense,” Janus insisted, reaching forward to gently steal Logan by his sleeve. “If you need more motivation than just my requesting, think about how thrilled Remus will surely be knowing you had a hand in this batch.”

Logan let himself be pulled towards the workstation, not having it in him to refuse Janus’ smile and persistence more than once.

“I suppose you have a point,” He conceded with a sigh and Janus clapped his hands together quietly.

“Splendid,” he plucked the box of food coloring from the counter and pushed the dark blue dropper into Logan’s hands. “This is the easy part anyway. I trust you completely.”

Somehow, the implication of Janus trusting him made him pause, feeling his chest going warm. Logan stared down at the small bottle in his hands, feeling even more clueless now being involved than he had simply watching Janus; but Janus still trusted him. It didn’t take a rocket scientist to tell that Janus was trusting him on reputation alone, something the others consistently seem to find inconceivable. Not often was Logan trusted so explicitly, which was concerning to say the least, but function aside, the sentiment filled him with unexpected happiness.

“Just get this,” Janus tapped one of bowls filled with water, corn syrup, and gelatin, “As close to this shade,” He then pointed to the blue swirl part of the Tide Pod resting between the various ingredients, “As you can get,” Janus finished with another disarming smile. Forcing himself to look away, Logan thought that at the rate Janus used that sort of charm on him like that, he’d never remember anything ever again.

“Okay,” He asserted slowly with a nod and unscrewed the small bottle. As he set to dropping small amounts of the dye before stirring and comparing the colors, Janus seemed to be doing the same with a shade of bright orange. “I suppose that’s good,” Logan ascertained after a few silent moments, holding the clear bowl up to his face for closer inspection.

“Flawless, I would say,” Janus complimented, completing his own color a second later. “Next,” He said slowly and reached to gather several of one kind of item that Logan didn’t immediately recognize, “We set the molds,” Janus explained as he neatly lined about a dozen purple, palm sized squares between them. Logan uttered a small, ah, in understanding.

He scanned the counter for a tool that would be useful here; the idea of pouring the liquid straight into the molds seemed rather silly and messy. If this were Patton, Logan wouldn’t put it past him, but Janus was far more structured, far more sensible.

“Should we use those?” Logan asked, reaching for the rather thick gauge baking syringes set to the side as Janus opened the molds to reveal a swirl shape identical to the signature Tide Pod.

“A step ahead of me,” Janus lilted with a nod, raising his eyes just enough to spot the syringes he planned on retrieving next. “Go on then,” He pointed his chin at the gelatin, reaching over Logan for a needle of his own. “I trust it’s fairly self explanatory for you.”

And it was; the entire procedure wasn’t particularly challenging, as long as Janus wasn’t smiling at him or charming him out of his brain cells. Logan drew up about half the syringe’s barrel and then held one half of the mold in his palm. Comparing it to the Tide Pod, he began to gently squeeze the blue solution along half of the swirl pattern, dragging it across the material for an even consistency. Janus smiled to himself, watching from the corner of his eye and began to do the same with his own orange gelatin, working from the opposite end of the line.

“When it comes to the ones already filled,” Janus began as they approached meeting in the middle, though before he could finish, Logan interrupted knowingly.

“I suppose I should avoid picking the mold up so as to not disrupt the other side,” He guessed and positioned his syringe at a different angle, experimenting with how he should go about it now before settling on a method.

“Precisely,” Janus delighted quietly, moving behind Logan and out of his way to fill in the orange sides of the already completed blue ones. “Typically,” He continued as they settled back into a rhythm, “I just do both colors at once, holding it as you had started,” Janus glanced out of the corner of his eye; Logan looked so concentrated, it was impossible not to find the focus in his eyes adorable. For a brief moment, before Janus continued, Logan began to worry that he was getting in the way as he feared. If Janus had a certain way of doing this and he was doing it wrong, comparatively, then it was just as he thought; that he shouldn’t have gotten involved.

“But I don’t quite mind this either,” Janus finished softly and Logan exhaled the breath he didn’t realize was being held. As the silence began to press on, he started to wish he could figure out something to say to Janus’ kindness. Then he wondered if this was how Remus often felt.

As Janus took Logan’s empty syringe and quickly rinsed both of theirs in the sink, he explained their next and final step before they would be placed in the fridge until completion. Sealing the molds with their domed, other half, they would repeat the filling action with the condensed milk and gelatin mixture.

“Simple enough,” Logan said as he accepted the syringe that Janus handed him with a smile. This time, Logan offered his own small expression before the two set to work. After a few silent moments, he continued with a rather impulsive question. “Does Remus ever help you with this?” Surely he did; in the same way Logan found it impossible that Remus never expressed his gratitude to Janus, he couldn’t fathom that the two didn’t enjoy this together.

“Oh, no, never,” Janus answered immediately with an appalled tone. Logan blinked, his hand going still as he again reevaluated how he perceived their relationship. “The first and only time I tried to get him to help,” He continued, his own hands pausing to stare wide eyed and offended at Logan, “He ate three of my molds!”

Logan couldn’t help the small smile that curved his lips, though he tried to dismiss it quickly by pursing them and looking away. The distress Janus clearly felt for something so simple was … a bit bewildering, but also very him, Logan decided. He got the sense that Remus would love to help, if he could, but that he had the habit of ruining Janus’ things in the process. With a heavy sigh, Janus went back to filling the molds and when Logan could keep the smile out of his voice, he continued.

“The other day he brought a few rocks from the Imagination to my room and asked what they were. He does that,” Logan glanced at Janus, “Stops by and asks questions like that, but when I located my geology kit, the first thing he did,” Logan smiled again, fondness creeping into his tone despite himself, “Was tear the handbook pages in excitement,” Janus clicked his tongue and shook his head, empathizing with the tragedy, but Logan continued, gesturing in small ways now. “It was completely illegible,” Logan paused, recalling the fear in Remus’ expression as he apologized profusely, handing the torn book back by the tips of his fingers.

“Was?” Janus prompted quietly, watching Logan’s faintly passionate storytelling from the corner of his eye.

“At least for its intended use as a portable guide. If you pushed the papers together, you could piece the sentences but,” Logan paused again and shook his head, “He insisted on writing it, all of it. He took one of my notebooks right there and stared down at the little book and wrote everything he could make out,” Logan laughed dryly and resumed filling the mold he had stopped on. “I bet he has the entire handbook memorized now.”

“He adores you very much then,” Janus said without reservation, without even looking away from the molds. The conclusion caught Logan off guard and silence persisted as he waited for Janus to elaborate; but no such continuation came. Again Logan found himself holding his breath, but it wasn’t like he didn’t know that Remus loved him. He said it at least ten times a day. It just felt very different coming from someone who’s known Remus for so long, Logan guessed. It’s different when someone else can see love that easily.

“I know,” Logan whispered sentimentally after a while, and wondered in the enduring silence of their work if he should’ve said that Remus loved Janus very much, too.

- - - - -

Janus paused on the bottom step of the Dark Side stairs as he spotted Logan, bent slightly at the waist and jotting something down on a rather large stack of white paper. The astringent smell of Sharpies was unavoidable. While it certainly wasn’t new at this point for Logan to be found here on a casual basis, it was a bit strange that Remus wasn’t in the immediate area.

“Hello, Logan,” Janus greeted in a smiling tone as he continued into the room and approached the workspace that was their dining table.

“Hello,” He returned the friendly gesture without tearing his eyes away or stopping his hand from drawing a simplistic symbol in one of the dated squares.

“What brings you here without your typical consort?” Now peering over Logan’s shoulder, Janus realized it wasn’t just any stack of paper he was writing on, but a wall calendar.

“Remus just went to the bathroom. He’ll probably be back in a few moments.”

Janus made a soft sound of understanding and continued to watch. Capping the silvery marker he had been using, Logan switched it out for a dark blue one. Intrigue growing, Janus observed as he neatly drew an open circle, then some complex looking arrow shape beside it. Next Logan drew an odd arch shape on the other side of the square beside another open circle, this one with a dot in the center. Then two smaller circles diagonal from each other connected with a single line. Finally, next to that symbol, he drew a half crescent moon. Janus’ brows furrowed delicately.

“Logan, dear?”

“Hm?”

“What on Earth are you doing?”

Logan blinked and paused before slowly standing from his leaning position. He … didn’t really know where to begin. Talking about his hobby with Remus was one thing; while his boyfriend readily listened to his enthusing and had even offered his artistic expertise in ‘livening up’ the calendar today, the idea of explaining it to Janus felt like a different beast altogether. Why was that? Logan observed his feelings on the matter, staring down at the calendar. The writing there was neither impressive nor sloppy, but a typical middle ground of insignificantly informative, in his opinion. Mindlessly, he brought the marker up to his chest and capped it with a decisive click. His stomach became uneasy imagining himself divulging eagerly, about anything, to Janus. Why was that?

“I’m,” Indulging in a pseudoscience? Partaking in something that is unreliable and interpretive at best? Having an indemonstrable belief system? Being less than serious? Logan turned to face Janus, his arms falling to his sides. “Calculating planetary positions and hypothesizing on their potential,” Spiritual? Emotional? “Financial, political, and interpersonal ramifications,” Logan’s heart raced. He counted the beats. One, two, three, fourfivesixseveneight--

“I see,” Janus said reflexively but then paused to digest the sentence. It sounded interesting enough to him; foresight was high on his list of well regarded practices. Whatever helped in that pursuit, Janus found at least a little compelling. Though he cocked his head slightly and gave Logan a once over. Was he acting rather … defensive? There was no lie in his words, Janus would’ve immediately known after all, but he got the sense that he wasn’t being painted the full picture here.

A bead of sweat dripped down the back of Logan’s collar. Janus wasn’t looking at him in any specific way, there wasn’t anything interrogative about the silence, in fact Janus’ expression was rather polite. Logan had noticed at some point that Janus looked at him more like an equal than any of the other accepted Sides. In return, he had come to trust the intrigue frequently found in his expressions. And yet he was anxious. Why? Historically, talking to Janus had never made him nervous before, sharing in pastimes together hadn’t either, so … why did he feel like sinking through the soles of his shoes and never speaking about this, ever again?

“Well,” Janus broke the silence with his entertained tone. “You were always into space and such, I shouldn’t be surprised.”

Logan inhaled through his nose, more suddenly than he meant to, and realized only now there was a tension in his hands as they twitched to relax. Janus didn’t see anything wrong with his description of the hobby, but the fact was that he didn’t know the whole story. Logan’s explanation was, of course, accurate; accurate enough to not count as a lie, but Janus’ suspicion was warranted. A suspicion that was much closer to curiosity than Logan realized in his paranoid attempt to seem and sound more serious than necessary.

“Yes,” He mumbled and turned back around to the calendar. Janus watched with narrowed eyes as Logan placed the marker back with the rest, seeming to have a particular order that they belonged in. After a pause, he diverted his attention to the open, beige colored notebook on the other side of the table. Logan began to lightly drag a finger along the bottom of a written line of symbols there. Janus could only assume he was committing their exact meaning to memory in a way only someone like Logan could.

“So tell me,” Janus interrupted again as he elegantly sat himself down at the table opposite Logan, whose train of thought halted abruptly. “What do those symbols mean?” Janus asked, cradling his cheek in his palm as he reached the other hand to point at the five dark blue markings Logan had made. Logan swallowed and blinked slowly, bracing himself. There was no way he made it out of this conversation with Janus’ opinion of him remaining positive.

Keeping his tone as neutral as possible, Logan then dragged his finger along each symbol as it was defined, meeting Janus’ inquisitive eyes with his own hesitant gaze.

“Full moon,” Open circle, “Sagittarius,” arrow. Logan directed his finger to the other side of the square, dictating that those two symbols didn’t correlate in a direct sense to the next three. “Gemini,” He continued, pointing to the odd arch shape, “Sun,” dotted open circle, “Opposition,” the two smaller circles connected by the thin line, “Moon,” Logan finished at the half crescent moon shape.

A puzzled look flashed across Janus’ face before the words connected like a puzzle, forming a sentence he understood theoretically but in no literal way; full moon in Sagittarius, Gemini sun, opposition moon … which was in Sagittarius then? Janus could only guess. These were phrases he’s heard before, of course, but Logan said them in a way that felt far more significant than any well-rated horoscope app had.

Logan let Janus ruminate on his explanation, hoping no more questions came at the detriment of his reputation. Again he started to consult his notebook, but it was only a few moments before Janus spoke again.

“So … what’s the significance of … all that?” He asked and Logan’s mind raced in the same way Remus, Roman, and Virgil could speak at a mile a minute.

“The significance,” Logan began after what felt like much longer than a moment of struggling to quiet his mind, “Is as I said; potential financial, political, and interpersonal ramifications,” He completed in a mumble before clearing his throat, unable to meet Janus’ eyes anymore, causing the latter to frown.

The fact that Logan was growing increasingly uncomfortable wasn’t lost on Janus, of course. He watched the gears churning in Logan’s mind as mental gymnastics were performed. It wasn’t a secret to Denial why he felt discontented currently; being taken seriously was paramount to this Side and everyone had a long history of finding Logic to be a joke. After years of being dismissed without advocacy, Janus could only hope to display a patience and interest deep enough for Logan to find himself comfortable in his presence again.

“As you said,” Janus agreed, dismissing that superficial statement. “But what about that one, specifically? It’s in blue so I assume it has some significance.”

Logan’s lips tightened; where did he even begin? Explaining the correspondence between phenomena and full moons? Diving into Jupiter’s mythology and Sagittarius’ significance to Thomas, personally, as his moon ruler? The unease in his stomach shifted up his throat.

“Oh hey, Dee!” Remus suddenly interrupted as he returned from down the hall. If Logan were a man of lesser self control, he may have jumped right out of his skin.

They both turned to blink at the entrance, Logan a second too late as Remus dotted an affectionate kiss to his cheek. Rigidly, he gave a half-lipped smile to the gesture.

“Lolo telling you about his nerdy Astrology stuff?” Remus plopped himself into a chair between them at the table.

“Just a little,” Janus said as he sat back and crossed his legs.

“Booooo,” Remus cheered, giving Logan a thumbs down before grinning. He leaned over to peer at the dark blue symbols that were drawn while he was away. “Full moon in Sagittarius,” Remus read like he was fluent in this second language Janus had only just learned the existence of. “And uh,” He paused, cocked his head in order to read the markings easier, “Gemini sun, uh, what’s that one again, Lolo?” Remus pointed at the connected, diagonal circles.

Janus narrowed his eyes. He got the sense that Remus could easily say what that sign meant, but had asked Logan in order to hear him talk about it. How sweet.

“Opposition,” Logan repeated like a sigh as he reached to scratch the back of his neck. “Since the sun is in Gemini for most of this month, it will be opposing the moon’s position in Sagittarius that day.”

“Does that spell trouble for Tommyboy?” Remus asked mischievously, leaning back in his chair and propping his feet up on the unused seat behind Logan.

“On the contrary,” Logan responded, opening his mouth to continue but then quickly closing it as the corner of his vision registered Janus again.

The frown on Janus’ lips grew deeper as he silently observed the two. It seemed to come down to him and his effects on Logan’s nerves; the assumption that he would dismiss him like Patton, Roman, and Thomas, or say that he was wrong like Virgil.

“Please,” Janus urged in his most genuine tone as he held up his hands like a white flag. “Pretend I’m not here, do carry on.”

Logan inhaled slowly and seemed to take his time believing that sentiment. Another mental stalemate began; Logan wrestled with the expectations he held himself to, the assumed expectations Janus had of him, and the misconception that his hobby would be seen as silly or less than in any way. The silence dragged on until Remus broke the tension once more.

“Yeah, c’mon Lolo. Dee listens to me rant about stupid shit all the time. He’s got the patience of a Saint, I swear,” Remus smirked at Janus, who then reached out to pull affectionately on his partner’s ear.

“Like I have a choice with you,” Janus mumbled fondly, lacing his voice with thick sarcasm.

Quickly, Remus turned his head like a baited shark and bit after Janus’ hand as it was retracted, narrowly missing the appendages with his teeth. Janus rolled his eyes and Remus beamed before shifting in his seat and staring up at Logan expectantly.

Logan’s chest burned with some unfamiliar feeling as he watched the clearly loving display. Naming emotions certainly wasn’t his strong suit, but whatever it was tightened his throat and made swallowing difficult. As usual for him, the feeling was quickly pushed away.

Which caused it to land directly into Denial’s jurisdiction. Janus had long perfected the art of remaining stoic in the face of blindsiding emotions that weren’t his own; which of course included now, as the denial of jealousy swiftly punched him in the stomach. Janus’ breathing stopped as he waited for the familiar pang of envy to subside, knowing by instinct that the originator stood before him.

“I suppose,” Logan continued after a moment before clearing his throat. “It is on the contrary that Thomas will be experiencing anything negative on this day or the two previous days leading up to this full moon,” He reached to flip a page in his notebook, revealing a neatly drawn chart of dates and signs. His finger rested decisively next to three in particular. “The moon will be in Sagittarius, opposing the current sun sign; Gemini. This is particularly good for Thomas since he has a natal Sagittarius moon.”

“Laaaaaame,” Remus exaggerated belligerently. Having been through this before, Logan gave a renewed half smile, knowing Remus only found Thomas’ lack of misfortune ‘lame’ and not the inherency of his explanation.

Janus exhaled finally as the emotional turmoil in his stomach subsided with Logan’s contentment. His chin raised curiously, eyeing the revealed page. This all sounded fascinating. He got the feeling that there was so much more to this topic, and that he would be very willing and rather eager to listen to it all as long as it was coming from Logan.

“Tell me, Lolo,” Remus said in a dark voice, frantically leaning forward, splaying his palms on the table and disregarding the way his quick movement made Logan’s markers roll away. “Do your charts and shit say when he’ll die?”

“No,” Logan sighed and rolled his eyes. The air turned sweet and Janus’ brows raised despite himself. “Even if they did, I wouldn’t tell you. It’d be incredibly subjective anyway,” Logan gestured dismissively and turned away, catching sight of Janus’ intrigued smirk. The expression made him gulp. “It’s all incredibly subjective,” He continued, now in a mumble as he went to close his notebook.

Hastily, Logan began to gather the haphazard markers like he planned on packing his project away for the day. Lie and jealousy aside, Janus found himself invested.

“Well,” He began as Logan took a step back from the table to stare at the floor, seeming to have lost a marker in Remus’ chaos. “I thought it was all rather … enchanting,” Janus flirted unashamedly, producing the green hued utensil between his fingers with a curled smile. Logan blinked, the tips of his ears going red. “You’ll tell me more sometime?” Janus insisted, turning the thing in his grip and offering it more pointedly.

Logan swallowed and reached to quickly pluck the object from Janus’ fingers.

“Sure,” He sighed, suddenly feeling like he had agreed to something rather damning.

“Delightful.”

Chapter One || Chapter Two

#loceit appreciation week #loceit week #loceitweek2021 #loceit #janus x logan #sanders sides fanfiction

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i-need-some-mint-tea · 4 years ago

Text

Cherries and Chess

I decided to write Fan AU 2; Electric Boogaloo

Words: 1704

Tags: @imma-potatoo @red-imeanblue

Pairings: Loceit, but they’re both gay idiots despite being so smart

(Logan’s perspective)

It had been a week since I had first joined Janus on the ceiling fan. In that time, we had established a routine. I’d usually get up first, eat some cherries that I stick to the ceiling, replace them, talk with Janus, Patton would hand us some food with some help from Roman (Patton got on his shoulders so he could reach us), Virgil would get a snack, talk with Janus, do some other activity, talk with Janus until it was dark outside, then sleep. Rinse and repeat. I had to admit, it was quite nice. Most surprisingly, talking with Janus wasn’t as draining as talking with the others. That was most fortunate because he was the only person who was constantly with me.

The sound of footsteps brought me back to reality slightly, by the pattern of them, I knew it was Patton bringing us breakfast. I saw him walk into the kitchen, “Heya, kiddos!”

He said cheerfully. “Good morning, Patton,” I heard Janus say. I heard the fridge open, but I paid no mind, I was too absorbed in my thoughts to care. I heard Patton take a deep breath in. I knew what was going to happen, I covered my ears. “ROMAN!” Patton yelled, immediately summoning the side in question.

“Yes, padrè?” Roman questioned, then saw where he was summoned to. “You do know, Patton, that you could just do this,” Roman waved his hand dramatically and a pulley system materialized right next to me. “You can use this pulley to bring them food. Now, if you’ll excuse me, I need to finish my morning routine. A prince must look his best!” With that, Roman sunk out.

“Thanks, kiddo!” Patton called after him. The three of us sat in silence, the sizzle of bacon Patton was making the only sound. That peacefulness was quick to end as Remus came barreling into the kitchen.

“Hey, nerds!” He called out to who I presumed to be Janus and I. The both of us looked down at him. “Throw the cherries down at me, I want to see how many I can catch in my mouth!” He said as he grinned maniacally.

“I suppose that would be interesting.” I tilted my head, “That’d be a good experiment. How many cherries can one catch if they’re thrown off of a rotating object?” I asked aloud.

“Let’s find out, shall we?” Janus said, and before I could answer, he plucked a cherry from the bag sitting next to me and threw it down at Remus. I saw Remus’s eyes light up as he dove for the cherry like the only thing that mattered was catching it. To my surprise, he did catch it. Never underestimate Remus, I guess.

We threw 7 more cherries down at Remus before Patton said, “Well I do think this is fun, maybe you should turn the fan off, it could be a haza-“ I cut him off, “It’s for science, Patton!” I said with a grin on my face.

“I’ve seen you smile a lot more ever since you got on that ceiling fan, kiddo.” Paton smiled, “I guess I’ll let it slide.” Wait. I’ve been smiling more?

“Patton, what do you mean I’ve been smiling more?” I asked as I tossed another cherry down to Remus. He caught that one as well, that’s 27 he’s caught.

I saw Patton scrunch his nose and looked a bit confused, like that was something I should’ve known, “Yeah, Logan. You seem happier.” He suddenly looked mischievous, “Any reason for that?” He asked innocently.

I was even more perplexed. Happier? Reason? How could I supply a reason if I hadn’t even known I was happier? I’ll deal with that later, I guess.

“Care- care to elaborate?” I asked. Patton then looked like he’d uncovered a secret, and his eyes lit up. “Oh, never mind.” He said happily.

I turned to Janus to see if he was listening to see if he could explain what Patton meant, but he was caught up in throwing cherries down at Remus. Finally, a cherry hit Remus in the eye. “How many was that?” I asked excitedly.

As he caught my eye, Janus said, “47. 47 cherries.” Wow, impressive. I looked to Remus, who had picked the cherry off the ground and ate it. I could hear an audible, exaggerated gag from Janus as he watched Remus. I let out a breath of laughter.

“Hey, Janus?” I asked. “Yes, my dear nerd?” He replied, looking at me. I froze for a second when he called me that. Why do I always do that? “Would you- would you want to play chess?” I asked, tripping over my words a bit. I saw Janus nod, seemingly eager to play.

After many hours and 10 games, I said once more, “Checkmate.” Janus looked at me seemingly both bewildered and in awe.

“I have to say, you are very good at chess, Logan,” he said to me. I smiled a bit as my chest swelled with pride, “Thank you, Janus. You are a formidable opponent.” We both had worn ourselves out from so much chess. I had won 6 times, Janus 5 times. This was my seventh win.

It was only 5:00 in the afternoon, yet I was exhausted. As I laid down, I immediately went to sleep.

~~~

(Janus’s perspective)

Logan won again. I looked at him, “I have to say, you are very good at chess, Logan.” I shouldn’t be as surprised as I was, Logan was incredibly smart. That was one of the things I admired about him. Logan met my gaze with a slight smile, “Thank you, Janus. You are a formidable opponent,” he said to me. I smiled, I loved being complimented, especially by him.

I saw Logan yawn and laid down on the fan, with his glasses still on, might I add. Not once had he taken them off. If he always had before this, I didn’t notice. Then again I usually went to sleep before him. If he had his glasses on, he may break them or they may fall off the fan. I reached over and gently pulled off his glasses. Then I made the mistake of looking at his face after I pulled his glasses off.

Holy shit.

I felt a fluttering in my chest as I looked at him. “How the hell is your face so pretty.” I muttered. How dare he make me feel like this. Ew. I hate feelings, they’re so unpredictable and I don’t like it. Yet a small part of me didn’t exactly mind.

I set his glasses down next to him. I put my face in my hands and quietly groaned. I don’t know exactly why I reacted like that when I took off his glasses. Though, at the back of my mind, a possibility of why made itself clear. I ignored it. Nope, nope, not dealing with that today, nope.

I suddenly felt really tired, must’ve been from doing chess so much. I grabbed one of the blankets Patton gave us, laid down, and tried to go to sleep. Luckily, I did so in seconds.

~~~

I woke up for the sixth time, and I checked what hour it was. 5:27 AM was displayed clearly on the clock. I sighed, it’s close to morning, why not stay up? I summoned a cup of lavender tea, my favorite type. I looked out the window into the mindscape, and saw some stars still left in the sky. Maybe I'll look at the stars and watch the sunrise as I wait for my dear nerd to wake up. I wrote a quick note to Logan if he woke up before I got back stating where I was going. I placed the note on the fan, weighed down by the chess board from last night so it wouldn’t fly off the fan.

I hopped off of the fan, and was unpleasantly surprised when I found that my legs were a bit weak. Must be from not moving the past week.

As soon as I got outside onto the roof from the attic window, I felt a warm breeze on my face. Oh, that’s right, it’s spring. I climbed on the roof until I got to a comfortable spot. I looked out over the silent early morning world.

There was a heavily forested area to my right, with trees dotting the landscape everywhere else. There were patches of flowers everywhere, and I saw the grass move with the wind. Just to the left of my, there was a hill with a big oak tree with a tire swing and it too, was blowing in the wind.

I took a deep breath and drank in the scent of everything. I took off my hat, I liked feeling the wind in my hair. I set my hat next to me and looked up at the stars. There were so many stars, I could never count them all. Just then, I saw the sun peek out from over the hill. It bathed the world in early morning sunlight, making the dewdrops on the grass glisten.

I closed my eyes and just listened to the sound of the wind blowing through the trees and grass, as well as the chirps of the birds. I let out a sigh of contentment and hummed a bit.

“Beautiful, isn’t it?” I hear a familiar voice say. I opened my eyes and saw Logan approaching me on the roof. “It truly is,” I said quietly as he sat beside me. We sat in comfortable silence while watching the sun rise. I had closed my eyes again when Logan spoke, “Janus?” He said softly, as if any louder and he’d disturb the morning world. “Yes?” I asked, not opening my eyes.

“I wanted to thank you for taking off my glasses the other night. I tend to shift in my sleep, so if you hadn’t done that, I surely would’ve broken them,” he said softly. “It’s no big deal,” I replied as the image of what he looked like without the glasses flashed through my mind. The fluttering feeling returned, but I paid it no mind.

We spoke no more as I opened my eyes and together we watched the sun rise.

Hope y’all liked it! I’m having so much fun writing this!

#loceit #mintwrites #loceit fic #logan #logan sanders #deceit #janus #janus sanders #patton #patton sanders #remus #the duke #remus sanders #gay idiots #sanders sides

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cotncandyboifics · 4 years ago

Text

A Lovely Night: Chapter 4

AO3 Link

Masterpost

Chapter 1 ~ Chapter 2 ~ Chapter 3 ~ Chapter 5 ~ Chapter 6

Pairing(s): pre-established roceit & prinxiety, anaroceit, eventual anaroloceit, eventual intruality

Word count: ~2k

Story summary: Roman's boyfriends had had a rivalry since before either of them had actually met Roman. Running a bit late to a date night, Roman accidentally gets them to start dating too.

General CW: non-detailed description of an anxiety attack, non-detailed description of physical pain, food, kissing, potentially triggering descriptions of physical bodies, swearing, caps lock, school settings, s-xual innuendos, slight description of gore(imagery), vague descriptions of anxiety, Implications of an eating disorder, fatigue, dissociation, suppression of stimming, implied heavy restriction (ED), inner monologue-style anxiety description, eating,(will be added to as I write more)

Chapter CW: Food, School setting, caps lock, (let me know if i missed anything please!)

Author notes: and so the nerd enters the snake's den... (this chapter is nothing like that, I just think Loceit is neat, ignore me being a dork)

...

Janus stepped cautiously as he looked down each aisle he passed. The shelves extended far into the room, lined with thousands upon thousands of books.

Janus appreciated that the fact that he went to Law school meant that the libraries were extremely well-funded and filled to the brim with all sorts of books. Mostly Law-related books, although there was a reasonably hefty section for recreational reading. He paced between the aisles labeled D, seeking a particular few texts mentioned by one of his professors in a lecture earlier that day.

Janus was too focused on scanning the titles and authors of the books lined before him that he didn't realize his sudden proximity to a stranger. The stranger seemed to have been doing the same, and they quite literally bumped into each other.

They were the same height, but Janus had a slightly larger build, and so on impact the other person fell entirely on their butt while Janus only stumbled backward slightly, quickly gripping the edge of a bookcase to steady himself.

"My deepest apologies. I was not looking where I was going." Janus righted himself, reaching a hand down to help the stranger up.

"I believe we were both too captivated by our searches that neither of us anticipated literally running into another person. My apologies are offered as well." The stranger took Janus' hand, and Janus had to steel himself so as not to gape.

This stranger was beautiful. His hair fell in wisps over his thick glasses, a deep raven shade. His hand felt cold when he took Janus', even through Janus' compression gloves. He had bright eyes that glinted with a childlike hunger for knowledge, all held behind a glassy calm collection. His cheeks were dotted with freckles, and his lips looked pale and soft. Janus internally cursed himself for thinking of this stranger's lips, and pressed a small smile onto his face.

"A mutual mistake, then. My name is Janus." Janus pulled the stranger to his feet, and when he didn't pull his hand away, Janus kissed his knuckles chastely. The stranger's face somehow paled and brightened at once, eyes widening as a rosy shade overtook their cheeks.

"R-right," he tried, "What, er, what were you looking for, Janus?" the stranger inquired, running his fingers through his hair to collect it a bit.

Janus tutted for a moment, trying to recall. "Ah, yes." He recited the title of the book he'd been searching for. "My critical thinking professor suggested that we read it. supposedly it shall b-"

"boost our chances on the final come end of term," the stranger completed. "I suppose we must have the same professor, because mine recommended the same." he offered a small smile, and Janus returned it, eyes lighting up a bit.

"Well dear me, I hope they still have two copies," Janus laughed a little nervously, and the two began a duel-force search for the book they both sought.

Shortly they discovered that there were, in fact, only two copies left. They conversed briefly about the nature of their shared course as they approached the front desk to check their books out.

"Well, I must be off for now," Janus sighed, straightening his capelet. He nearly completed his statement with 'I must get home to my boyfriends,' but admitting to a practical stranger that he was not only gay but also polyamorous wasn't exactly the smartest thing, in his experience. "However, I find it may be mutually beneficial if we might see each other again? Perhaps we can study together," Janus asked, almost in spite of himself. What was he doing, exactly? He didn't even know this stranger's name-

"That sounds... adequate," he pulled Janus from his conflicted thoughts. "Would you like to meet here, same time tomorrow?" he inquired, meeting Janus' eyes and pushing his glasses up in a way that Janus found far too cute.

Janus cleared his throat. "An acceptable proposal... I'm sorry dear, I'm not sure that you shared your name." Janus smiled, and the stranger gulped slightly, cheeks turning pink beneath his freckles again.

"Um... Yes. Right. Well, I'll see you tomorrow then." he brushed past Janus in a rush, but halted, seeming to realize something. He turned back to Janus, adjusting his necktie. "My apologies. My name is Logan." He spoke, frozen for a moment, before nodding to himself and turning to leave once more.

"Logan..." Janus smiled to himself. He'd thought the stranger's appearance rung a bell. "It appears I have some good news for a certain Prince of mine."

Janus sat at the dinner table with his hands folded, thumb rubbing against his gloved palm as he bit back a smile. Virgil was shoveling salad onto his plate across the table only slightly barbarically. Dinner was just starting, as Roman had texted that he'd be home shortly, and Virgil wanted to get a bit of a head start.

"What's your damage, snakey?" Virgil commented, glancing pointedly at Janus' hands. translation: I can see that you are worried, love. What can I do to help?

"I have some news for Roman," Janus started, smile on full display now, "that I think he'll find quite enticing. I'm just a bit anxious for his arrival."

"Jeez," Virgil scoffed a bit, "It's really not like you to..." Virgil stopped, finally looking up to see Janus' genuine smile, his eyes so full of feelings. Virgil's eyes widened.

"I so wish that I could tell you," Janus blurted, "But I want Roman to hear it first. Or at least, at the same time." He was still smiling, and Virgil was still dumbfounded.

"Okay..." He watched Janus warily as he scooped a forkful of salad into his mouth. Janus made a chipper noise and began serving himself as well.

They heard the front door burst open down the hall, and Janus grinned mischievously, adjusting himself in his seat a bit in his excitement. Virgil gaped at him for a second before turning his head, calling to Roman, "We're in here love," Never breaking his gaze on Janus and shoveling another large scoop of salad into his mouth. Virgil was undeniably captivated by the strange behavior his boyfriend was displaying.

Roman stomped down the hall in a bit of a frenzy. "A WEEK!" He practically shouted, washing his hands as he exclaimed, "seven entire DAYS and I haven't seen Logan even a single time!" He scoffed to himself as he dried his hands. "Do you think it possible that he'd entirely drop from the show simply because I asked him on a date!? That seems HIGHLY improbable!" Roman huffed as he sat at the head of the table, beginning to grumpily serve himself.

"It's entirely possible that his absence is due to the fact that he's currently swamped with his Law studies. Any man knows balancing your time in our program is a god's errand." Janus spoke smoothly through a smirk, and Virgil's jaw dropped.

"'a god's errand?' my love, that's hardly what that saying means," Roman consoled, not having processed the rest of Janus' words. They both looked at him after a moment, and he returned their gazes confusedly. "What?"

Virgil snapped his head toward Janus. "You met him? He goes to your school??" Virgil was in absolute awe. His face looked frozen in terror, but Roman and Janus knew by now that he was, in fact, not horrified when he made that face.

"WHAT?" Roman was suddenly leaning a little too close to Janus. "You met him? You're sure it's him? Did you speak to him? Oh you must have - I'm SURE he couldn't keep himself away from you, you devilish minx - my goodness, what HAPPENED?" Roman was falling over himself, giving Janus a pleading look through his immense grin.

"Take a breath, please my dear," Janus cooed, reaching to hold Roman's hand. "I did... run into him, yes. Judging by your... very detailed description of him, Roman, I was suspicious from the get-go. When he told me his name, I was sure." Janus spoke, clearly struggling to conceal his excitement.

"You ran into him?" Virgil repeated, still looking completely appalled. Janus chuckled.

"Yes... we both happened to be searching for the same book, an optional assigned reading for our shared critical thinking class," Roman squealed in delight. Janus continued, "We quite literally bumped into each other, and... We searched for the book together. There were only two copies left, which was..."

"Perfect," Roman whispered, stars in his eyes. Virgil had taken to staring at his plate to hide his smile.

"I do have to concede, Roman, that he is in fact... incredibly dashing." Janus kissed Roman's knuckles, and Virgil shrunk a little further into his hoodie, face thoroughly tomatoed.

"S-so did you get his number, or what?" Virgil spoke breathily after a moment.

"Ah. No, not exactly. In fact, I hardly got him to share his name." Janus conceded, but his tone remained sultry and smooth. "However. We did decide to meet again, tomorrow. At the library once more, to study together." Janus tried to keep his sly smirk but it was churning itself into a giddy smile.

Roman groaned. "You HAVE to get his number tomorrow!!!! I don't know how I'll live with myself if I can never see him again..." Roman slumped in his chair, slamming his forehead a bit clumsily on the tabletop with a soft 'ow'. Janus chuckled at him.

"All in due time my dear, all in due time. I feel it is a bit... optimistic to suspect that our bespectacled spectacle is not only attracted to men, but polyamorous, or at minimum willing to be romantically involved with a partner who is in a separate polyamorous relationship..." Janus brought his hand to his chin, tapping his pursed lips with his index finger pensively. Roman looked up to engage himself in listening to Janus more properly. "He seems rather... fragile. I feel it may be important that we take our time with him, and do our best not to... overwhelm him with bouts of affection," Janus spoke carefully, looking at Roman pointedly, who smiled sheepishly.

"Ok cool. Yeah. I get it, you guys are the only ones who get to meet our future boyfriend," Virgil commented, the foreshadowing in his words entirely unknown to himself. "Can we just eat and deal with this later, once Jannie has had the chance to talk to the guy again?" Virgil acted annoyed, but the lingering rosy shade in his cheeks was an undeniable giveaway. His boyfriends smiled at him fondly.

"I love you, Virgil," Roman blurted, looking at Virgil with a shocking tenderness that made Virgil almost nervous. Roman reached out to take Virgil's hand, who quickly accepted.

"I love you too Ro," Virgil kissed the inside of Roman's wrist, doing his best in his gay panic state to let his sincerity bleed out a bit. "So so much."

Roman blushed, gripping the hem of Virgil's hoodie and yanking him into a kiss. If Roman's grip weren't iron, Virgil would have fallen face first onto the floor between them. Janus laughed at them, smiling bright and watching as Virgil struggled to remain balanced.

#sanders sides #loceit #janus sanders #logan sanders #virgil sanders #roman sanders #prinxiety #anaroceit #anxceit #roceit #anaroloceit #logince #loginceit #tags suck :P

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bonniebelleklyde · 4 years ago

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My health is on the fritz, so I can’t really do any actual writing at the moment, but I’ve been thinking a whole lot about what Loceit’s first Valentine’s Day would look like within the Mistletoeverse (Mistletoe itself is a perfect example of how much I love holiday-themed fic). Given that Roman has already established himself as Logan’s self-appointed love coach, the whole thing is inevitably going to be a beautiful, chaotic mess.

I really hope I’m able to post at least a bullet fic on or around Valentine’s Day, because the image of Logan--- open-mouthed and horrified as Roman outlines all of the absolutely necessary elements of the perfect Valentine’s Day-- is just hysterical to me, and I very much want to write it.

#what do you MEAN you don't know how to waltz #well there's the rest of my week gone #because lessons start RIGHT NOW sir #i love these ridiculous boys with my whole heart #loceit #platonic logince #logan sanders #janus sanders #roman sanders #valentines day #mistletoe #mistletoeverse #tw real life illness

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vindicatedvirgil · 4 years ago

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only fools rush in / part one: two parties and a lot of crushes

this first part is kind of all over the place. basically i just wanted to establish the dynamics going on here and i figured the best way to do so would be through group hang outs and stuff like that. it feels like i cover a lot here, but future installments will be more focused on one couple or group! sorry for the kind of wackiness and yeah.

i don’t think that there’s anything that i need to tag for this, but this part includes: QPP loceit, Remus making jokes, Roman crushing hard, Emile and Remy very briefly.

[masterlist]

if you want to be tagged when i update, please send me an ask/reply/reblog and i’ll be sure to add you for the next part!

read to the end for the title and a small teaser for part two!

next update will be on: Sunday, July 19.

---

“Wait, you have a twin?” Patton looked at Roman in deep disbelief. “Why didn’t you get an apartment with him?” Roman just shrugged, unloading one of his boxes, hanging up his shirts. “Lo, did you know about this?”

“Yes. He’s one of Janus’ new roommates,” the man in the tie said, leaning against the wall, eyes focused on the phone in his hand as he typed quickly. Patton’s jaw dropped, and he crossed his arms, frowning.

“Yeah, he’s moving in with Virgil Cloud, too,” Roman said, eyes focused forward, but he couldn’t hide the light dusting of pink that appeared on his cheeks. Virgil was the techie for the last school production, and Roman couldn’t help but fall for the embodiment of a dark and stormy night, with his black nail polish and purple fringe and–

“Earth to Roman,” Patton was waving a hand in front of his face. Roman blinked, then smiled awkwardly at his pastel-clad roommate. “You should invite them all to a party tonight! Logan, will you tell Jan to bring his roommates?”

“I- we were gonna…” Logan sighed, then nodded, head hanging in front of him, “I guess so.” He didn’t have the heart to tell his roommates that he and his partner had other plans for the evening, so he texted Janus quickly about the change.

Roman and Patton want you to bring your roommates over for a party tonight. We can leave early, though. -Logan

A party could be fun, Lo. Besides, I think that Virgil has a crush on Roman. ~Janus

I believe that it’s mutual. I don’t really want to stick my nose into their business, though. -Logan

Logan opened the door to the apartment to see Janus, Remus, and Virgil standing there. Remus was holding a twelve-pack of beer, Janus had a bottle of wine, and Virgil kept his eyes down on the floor, not acknowledging anything as the three stepped into the apartment. Logan kept the door open since it was already warm in the apartment with the three of them; the end of summer was always unbearably hot in their town. Roman immediately gravitated towards Virgil as the others went over to the kitchen counter to open their drinks.

“Hi Virgil,” Roman said, smiling brightly. “I don’t know if you remember me–”

“Of course I do,” Virgil muttered, leaning against a wall awkwardly. “You were the lead in the play last term.” Roman stammered over his words, his cheeks once again dusted with pink.

“Oh, yeah, yeah, that…” he chuckled awkwardly, rubbing the back of his neck. “You uh, did a really great job as one of the tech guys. It was… awesome.”

“Thanks.” Virgil stuffed his hands into his jacket pockets, and he still hadn’t looked up at Roman.

“Can I uh… get you a drink or something? Or…” Roman’s words trailed off, he wished that Virgil would just look up at him and meet his eyes and then maybe they’d fall in love–

“Hey there!” Emile stepped in through the open front door, carrying a plate full of baked goods. “I just wanted to welcome you… oh, looks like somebody’s having a party!” Roman grumbled then went up to the man in the sweater, wondering how he could cope in the heat. “Hi there! I’m Emile Picani, I live downstairs!” “Nice to meet you. I’m Roman, and my roommates Patton and Logan are… somewhere,” he said, sticking his hand out. Emile giggled and brought the tall man in for a hug. “Oh, uh…”

“Sorry, I’m a bit of a hugger!” Emile laughed, setting the cookies down on a table. “You all go to the university? I’m working on my psychology doctorate there.” At this, Virgil perked up and came over, and Emile held his arms out for a hug.

“Please don’t,” Virgil muttered, and Emile backed up a little, giving a toothy smile. “Uh… you study psychology? I’m majoring in that…” He said shyly, and Emile pulled him by his wrist to sit down on one of the couches.

“Okay, I’m your mentor now! Let’s chat,” The two went to go sit down on the couch, and Roman frowned. Of course Virgil would be interested in chatting with someone in his field of study, but… he really wanted to talk to Virgil, maybe ask him on a date. He stuffed one of the cookies that Emile made into his mouth and groaned at how delicious they were. Of course he could bake. He’d probably be able to steal Virgil away, too.

Remus was watching this from his spot against one of the walls, and noticed his twin’s distraught demeanor. He thought about saying something, but out of the corner of his eye he saw Patton smiling brightly at something that Janus said, his sweater sleeves pushed up to his elbows, exposing colorful floral tattoos on his forearms, and that was it: Remus was smitten. He didn’t hesitate to approach the trio talking at the kitchen counter, Janus and Logan sharing a bar stool, Patton resting his chin on his hands as he listened to the pair recall how they decided to become partners over the summer break. Remus settled into a chair next to Patton, and silence fell over the table.

“I don’t believe we’ve met, cutie pie,” Remus said, raising an eyebrow at the small man. Janus and Logan exchanged a look and got up to go chat with Roman, and Patton turned his attention to focus directly on Remus.

“You must be Remus!” Patton exclaimed suddenly, eyes bright as his smile beamed at the curly-haired man, and Remus suddenly wished that he was wearing sunglasses. “I can’t believe I didn’t know that Ro had a twin!”

“Ah, you must be Patton,” Remus said, realizing that this was the roommate he didn’t know. Patton nodded excitedly. Remus stretched his hand out and grazed his fingers against the floral tattoos, and Patton shivered. “These are beautiful, though not as gorgeous as you, flower.”

“T-thank you,” Patton said, his face bright red at the fact that he was complimented and given a nickname. “Do you have tattoos?” Remus nodded and rolled up one of his jacket sleeves, revealing a morning star.

“I minor in medieval history. Weaponry is so fascinating,” he mused, and Patton nodded, brushing his short fingers over the tattoo. “I have a few more, but they’re in… unique places… Maybe I can show you someday, flower.”

“O-oh, uhm…” Patton stammered over his words, the blush spreading down to his neck and to his ears. “M-maybe…” Remus smirked, leaning closer to the small man.

“If I’m making you uncomfortable, please tell me,” He whispered, and Patton shook his head quickly, which made Remus smile. Patton wasn’t exactly Remus’ usual type; soft boys never paid much attention to those with piercings and a menacing glare, but Remus quickly realized that Patton wasn’t like the others.

“Y-You’re not…” Patton’s face was so red and warm that he felt like he could explode. No one like Remus had ever paid him this much attention. He was always taunted by jocks and punks because of his softness, but Remus? The dark makeup, the piercings, the tattoos, and the leather jacket, it all made him feel… dangerous. And Patton secretly loved danger.

Roman was leaning against the wall, watching as everyone else had someone to talk to. His twin was hitting it off with Patton, Janus and Logan were sitting on one of the couches, looking at something on Logan’s phone, and Emile and Virgil were on another couch, talking about psychology. He had never felt left out from any situation in his life before, but here he was, alone in a room full of people.

He couldn’t help but focus on Virgil, who had lit up as he talked about things that Roman knew nothing about. Roman was, of course, happy that Virgil was smiling, but he wished he was the one making the very tall man smile. Emile seemed nice enough, but… something about him irked Roman to no end.

“Oh, hang on,” Emile’s phone was ringing, the tune to a cartoon that Roman vaguely remembered blasting out loudly. He answered the phone, and Roman listened carefully. “Oh, sorry baby! I’m upstairs welcoming our new neighbors. I’ll be right there. Okay, bye.” He hung up and glanced around. “Sorry, that was my boyfriend Remy, I have to go!” He gave a hug to Virgil who waved goodbye awkwardly, then went around hugging everyone, and then left the apartment, closing the front door behind him. Virgil looked like he was going to melt into the couch, and Roman took this as his moment. He sat down next to the tall man and gave him a warm smile.

“So, uh, what do you think the production will be for this term?” Roman asked, and Virgil shrugged. “I’m hoping for a musical, but I’m not much of a dancer…”

“I kind of want something that allows me to experiment with fog on the stage, you know?” Virgil said, glancing down. “I’m not brave enough to audition for any roles on the stage, but I really like working behind the scenes…” Roman frowned, watching Virgil carefully.

“Well, when they announce the production and if there’s a role that interests you, I could help you… practice, maybe? To build up your confidence,” he suggested, but Virgil just shook his head. “I used to get stage fright really bad. But… if it’s something you love doing… then it’s worth all of that anxiety, right?”

“Is it?” Virgil’s voice was shaky. “In one of my school plays as a kid I fell on my face in front of everybody during my solo. Afterwards, I found out that someone purposely spilled water where they knew I’d be walking.” He twisted his fingers together, and Roman frowned. “Ever since, I haven’t wanted to be on stage in front of others.”

“No one would do that here,” Roman said reassuringly. “If they did, I’d beat them up until they fell on the ground, too,” his face was firm, resolved, and it made Virgil laugh a little. “I think… you should try. I’d love to perform with you.”

“Yeah… maybe,” Virgil looked down at him finally, and Roman thought he would melt into a puddle on the floor. “Thanks, Roman.”

“Remus is so cool, you know? And he’s so sweet,” Patton was blabbering. It was a few weeks after the party, and the three roommates were playing Mario Kart in the living room. In the time since that first party, the semester had started and they were all buried in school work, and had only seen the other three in passing or going out to dinner as a group. “N-not that you’re not cool, Roman, it’s just… he’s on a different level!”

“Yeah, a dangerous level,” Roman muttered so that Patton couldn’t hear, but Logan did, and he sighed. Roman didn’t want to reveal his fraught relationship with his brother to Patton, but he also wanted to protect the soft, small man. But… Patton was so enthralled, and Roman had never seen him that way. He seemed happier since meeting Remus, and had a confidence that didn’t exist in him before. But Roman definitely had a surge of concern for the other man.

“Do you think we should invite them all over today?” Patton suggested as he finally rolled over the finish line, in second to last place. Logan had gotten first, of course, and Roman a close second. This was the usual for their games.

“I actually have plans with Janus–” Logan started, but then his phone rang. He answered it. “Hello? Oh, hi Janus… what? But we were…” he sighed, then covered the receiver while he looked at the two others. “Remus wants to invite us all to their place for a movie night or something.”

“Yes!!” Patton exclaimed happily. “Oh, I should figure out what to wear. What time, Lo?” He asked, his excitement bubbling over. It was contagious. Roman could practically see the cogs in Patton’s mind moving as he thought about what to wear and how to do his makeup.

“Eight, apparently,” Logan responded, his lips pulled into a taut line. He brought the receiver back towards his mouth. “I guess we will be there. Yeah, see you later. Bye.” He hung up, a frown on his face. Roman wondered if he should dress nice, too, since he’d be seeing Virgil.

“Dibs on the first shower!” Roman exclaimed, dropping his controller and running off to the bathroom. Three guys and one bathroom wasn’t ideal, but it was what they had to deal with.

By the time all three of them had gotten ready, it was almost 7:30. Roman went with his usual attire, as opposed to Patton, who went a little overboard (probably to try and impress Remus): he was wearing a pale green sweater and some shorts, knee-high socks, and his converse, his makeup bright and colorful, the emphasis on his lips and eyes. Logan was wearing his usual attire as well, but had slipped into a coat since they’d be walking to the other building. It was only a few blocks away, but things always got sidetracked when Roman and Patton were involved.

Once Patton slung his messenger bag over his shoulder, the three set out to the others’ apartment. On their way down, they passed Emile, who was walking into the building with another man, their fingers intertwined.

“Hey kiddos!” Emile said cheerfully, waving his free hand at them. “Remy, these are the new neighbors I told you about!” The man called Remy raised his eyebrows then nodded in greeting.

“Hey babes,” he said.

“Where are you all going together?” Emile asked, and Roman thought it was a bit nosy to ask of them, but he said nothing.

“Oh, we’re going to Roman’s twin brother’s apartment–”

“Yes, and we really should get going now. Goodbye Emile, nice to meet you Remy,” Roman began to nudge Patton along the sidewalk, and Logan shot the couple an apologetic glance.

“Ugh, this movie is booooooring!” Remus yelled, startling the others. He had thrown his arms up in frustration. Logan and Janus were on the couch, trying to wait for the right moment to leave since they had their own plans. Remus, Roman, and Patton were on the floor or on cushions, eating the pizza they’d ordered, and Virgil was on the lounge chair, just observing.

“You’re the one who suggested a movie, idiot,” Virgil muttered, crossing his arms. Remus frowned, then finished off his bottle of beer. He made a soft hmmm noise, then began speaking again.

“This empty bottle gives me an idea. Spin the bottle, anyone? Or perhaps… truth or dare with spin the bottle?” He suggested, eyebrows wiggling. Patton’s face turned bright red, and some of the others all mumbled their disagreement.

“Isn’t that game for high schoolers, Re?” Roman asked, rolling his eyes. He glanced at Virgil, though, and wondered what it would be like to kiss him tonight. Not that he’d ever do that, Virgil hadn’t shown any interest in him, but…

“Sounds like fun,” Janus said, smirking from his spot next to Logan, who pouted. Janus noticed this and pressed a quick kiss to his cheek. “Oh, come now, Lolo, just a round or two and then we can go, okay? You know how much I love truth or dare.” Logan sighed, then nodded.

“Fine, a few rounds.”

The group moved the coffee table out of the way and sat in a circle, the empty beer bottle laying in the middle of all of them. “Alright, rule time,” Remus started. “The spinner asks the person it lands on for truth or dare, and then must ask them. The person who last did the thing spins it next. Capiche?” Roman shrugged and then pat Remus on the shoulder.

“You spin first, bro,” he said, settling in as he sat cross-legged on the floor. Remus shrugged and leaned forward, spinning the bottle. It pointed towards Logan, who sighed. Remus smirked, crossing his arms, deep in thought.

“Truth or dare?” Remus asked finally, meeting Logan’s eyes. It was silent for a few moments as Logan pondered his options. Janus leaned over and whispered something in Logan’s ear, and his partner nodded.

“Truth,” Logan said confidently, and Remus raised an eyebrow.

“Would you wear your best friend’s used underwear if you went camping and ran out?” Remus asked, and Patton giggled, covering his mouth to prevent spit from flying everywhere.

“Uh…” Logan glanced at Janus, who was trying to hide his laughter at the audacity of the question. “Yeah, I would? I’ve worn Janus’ underwear before–”

“Whoah, whoah, too much info, stop,” Virgil waved his hands, groaning. Patton pouted a little, frowning at Logan and Janus.

“I thought I was your best friend, Lo?” He asked, and Logan hit his forehead with his hand.

“You- Pat, ugh,” Logan was exasperated, and he glanced at Patton carefully. “You’re both my best friends, okay?” Patton seemed pleased with this answer, a smile crossing his features again. Logan leaned forward to spin the bottle, and it landed on Remus. “Uh…”

“I mean, if it’s just you two who get to play, that’s fine,” Virgil commented, leaning his back on the lounge chair behind him.

“Maybe if it lands on Logan again, though, you respin?” Patton suggested, and everyone else nodded in agreement. Remus shrugged, and then nodded to Logan.

“Dare me, Lodaddy,” he cackled, and Janus rolled his eyes, but still slid his hand over to rest on Logan’s thigh, a protective glare directed at Remus.

“I dare you to get an A in one of your courses this semester,” Logan smirked, adjusting his glasses. A few of the others grumbled about how that wasn’t fair, but Remus nodded in acceptance and held out his hand to shake Logan’s.

“Dealio!” He spun the bottle again and it landed on Roman. “Alright, twinny twin, truth or dare?” He waggled his eyebrows at his twin.

“I know better than for you to ask me a truth. So, dare,” Roman said, confident with his decision. An evil look crossed Remus’ eyes only briefly as he glanced between Roman and Virgil.

“Kiss the back of Virgil’s knee,” he said simply, and Roman nearly choked on his own saliva. Virgil buried his face in his hands, grumbling a little. Patton started to defend the two.

“Now, Virgil, you don’t have to–”

“Yes I do, it’s a fucking dare,” Virgil mumbled, standing up. He rolled one of his pant legs up and turned around so the back of his leg was facing Roman, whose face was bright red and who felt like his breath was being stolen from him. “Just make it quick, Princey.” Roman turned more red at the nickname, which probably stemmed from his role in the production from the previous semester. He scooted over to Virgil and pressed his lips to the bend between Virgil’s thigh and calf, and then scooted back, saying nothing. The tall man rolled his pant leg back down and sat down, explicitly not looking at Roman. His pale face was lightly pink.

After a few awkward beats, Roman leaned forward and spun the battle. It landed on Patton, who looked to be in deep thought. “Truth or dare, Pat?”

“Hmmm. I think truth is safer,” Patton admitted, and Roman thought a little. He hoped that his plan would work, but was concerned over what could come from a question like this. He really did want happiness for Patton, even if his brother was involved.

“What are three things you first noticed when you met your crush, if you have one?” Roman asked, and Patton glanced down at his fingers, twisting them together, his face dusted with a pale blush. Remus perked up a little, listening carefully to the answer the small man gave.

“U-um… well… I noticed that he has gray in his hair, that he has a lot of piercings, and that he has a cute smile,” Patton said this so quietly that everyone had to lean in to hear it. Patton’s face was bright red by the time he finished listing off the attributes, and everyone’s eyes trailed over to Remus, who was smirking. Patton quietly excused himself and practically ran to the restroom, grabbing his bag along the way, leaving the rest of the group in an awkward silence.

“Fuck, that’s on me,” Roman said, standing up. “I’ll go… check on him,” he said, and he followed Patton to the bathroom, knocking on the door once. “Pat, it’s me Roman, are you okay?”

“Why did you ask me that?” Patton asked from the other side of the door. It sounded like he was crying, since he was sniffling a little bit. “You know I like him, but I wasn’t ready to say anything, Ro.”

“I’m sorry, Patton, I just… I saw that you liked him and figured a little nudge could help…” Roman explained, then sighed. Maybe he had overstepped a little. “Do you wanna go home?”

“Roman,” a voice came from behind him. It was Remus. “Is he okay?” Concern was etched on his face, and he had crossed his arms. Roman was surprised to see this much care coming from his twin.

“Is that Remus? Oh god, hang on,” Patton sounded like he was panicking. “Where are my makeup remover wipes–” A clattering of things falling out of his messenger bag could be heard. “Shoot!” Remus and Roman exchanged a look as the noises of Patton being flustered echoed into the hallway. “I can’t believe… such a fool… dang it… stop crying, idiot…”

“Patton,” Remus stepped past Roman to knock on the door. “Patton, it’s okay… I uh…” He cleared his throat, “my first impressions of my crush were that he has really awesome floral tattoos, his pink hair is awesome, and he dresses in a really cute way.” He admitted. Roman started to back up, but saw Patton open the door and peek out.

“R-really…?” He asked. It was obvious he had been crying, his eyes were red and his eyeliner had smudged, but he had wiped the majority of it off. “Um…”

“Patton, do you wanna go on a date with me next weekend?”

Roman scooted out of earshot, and stepped back into the living room, but not before he heard Patton squeak out an affirmation. Janus and Logan had disappeared, maybe off to go and do whatever their plans were, and Virgil was scrolling on his phone.

“Sorry about Remus’ dare. If I’d have known about what he’d ask me to do, I would’ve gone with a truth instead,” Roman admitted. Virgil’s face hardened, but the theater major didn’t notice this. “I’d hate to make you uncomfortable.”

“Uh, it’s okay…” Virgil didn’t meet Roman’s eyes, though, as he sat down beside him on the couch. “Actually, um. I was looking at the roles for this next production? Have you looked yet?” Of course Roman had looked. They were going to be doing a production of Wicked, and Roman was absolutely stoked for it.

“Yeah, I’m planning on auditioning for Fiyero…” Roman mused, then remembered the conversation he had with Virgil a few weeks ago. “Is there a role you’re interested in, Virgil?”

“Um, actually, I’ve always loved Boq, but… I don’t know if I’m talented enough for that,” he admitted, twisting his fingers together. “Plus I’m a little tall to play a Munchkin.” Roman sighed, then smiled encouragingly at the taller man.

“Well, I can help you practice for the audition, if you’d like!” Roman said, and Virgil nodded. “I don’t think your height will affect anything, it’s all about talent!”

“Oh. Yeah… I’d uh… really appreciate that, actually.” Virgil responded, still looking down at his hands. “I just… auditioning is really scary, you know?” Roman shrugged, then set his hand on Virgil’s shoulder.

“Maybe they’ll let us audition together, so that way you’ve got a familiar face on stage,” he suggested. Virgil nodded, a small smile appearing on his face. “Hey, don’t worry, Virge. I think you’re gonna do great.”

---

teaser for part two: a botanical garden and some deep conversations

“I’ve never seen you so panicked over a first date, so I think that means that this is… real for you. You’re going to take this one seriously.”

“I want someone who understands how special I can be… but also someone who I can pamper and love with all of my heart.”

---

---

taglist (send an ask, reblog, or reply if you want to be added)

@winterrose42

@are-you-even--real

[masterlist]

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greenninjagal-blog · 5 years ago

Note

In your Kiss and Tell story, there's Intruality and is there also Remile as well?

There is! Although its very minor just like intruality, on account of the only established couple going into the game is Loceit! So they’re just really good friends, if you get my drift. Maybe I’ll get around to writing about them getting together some day soon!

[Kiss and Tell if you’re curious!]

#Kiss and Tell #greengabs #remile #lociet #analoceit #which is what the og story focuses on

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villlainarc · 5 years ago

Text

my writing arc (a masterlist)

✦ — author’s top three

✯ — tumblr’s top three

✧ — gift (may be different from what i’d normally write)

mcyt:

one shots

tumblr || word count || brief description (ao3)

dsmp

✯ begin again || 1.7k || non-canon wish fulfillment where tommy is able to fight dream without help (x)

dream is doing just fine || 377 || a drabble/analysis about god-adjacent dream

think of all the years gone by || 1.7k || five years later, tubbo mourns the loss of l’manburg (ft. clingy duo) (x)

✦ the little things || 825 || pure angst; tubbo doesn’t deal well with grief, and moving on is harder than you would think

rpf

golden boy, golden smile || 5.7k || dnf keep finding each other, despite living an ocean apart (x)

last life

✦✧ bend the nightmare || 7.4k || (**includes subtle romantic ethubs) a reimagining of last life if it had more horror elements and if etho had caused an apocalypse by saving bdubs from death too many times (x)

the weight of memory || 811 || etho reminisces about soulmates.

analysis (link. character(s); timestamp || word count)

I. dream + tommy; dethronement arc || 491

II. tommy; end of exile arc || 371

III. tommy + techno; the green festival || 505

IV. ranboo; after a ranboo lore stream (jan. 2021) || 491

V. tubbo; tommy’s prison death || 619

VI. jack manifold + niki + tommy + dream; tommy’s prison death || 513

VII. dream + wilbur + techno; dream talks about red herrings || 1.1k

VIII. tommy + dream; tommy’s plan to kill dream || 778

IX. george; quackity seeing george outside the prison || 506

X. quackity + foolish; after quackity recruited foolish || 687

XI. ✯ tubbo + quackity; the cookie outpost || 216

XII. dream team; tina’s first dsmp stream || 341

sanders sides

(note that much has been left unfinished)

one shots: tumblr || word count || brief description (ao3)

anxceit

a falling star, least i fall alone || 4.1k || hurt/comfort with past and future platonic/romantic anxceit (can be read either way); happy ending (x)

anxceitmus

✧ from the gutter to the stars || 1.9k || for figurative-siren-song because he’s incredibly valid, trans virgil hurt/comfort with platonic/romantic anxceitmus (can be read either way); happy ending

loceit

butterflies || 8.3k || a human au with established loceit and unrequited but platonic logince; unhappy ending (x)

logince

✯ all of these stars (will guide us home) || 11.5k || a guardian angel!roman au with pining logince; happy ending (x)

iridescent || 500 || roman’s so very in love; happy ending (x)

multi-ship

(i could put) a little stardust in in your eyes || 12.5k || a soulmate au with platonic logince, platonic sleepceit, and pining losleep and roceit with hurt/comfort elements; happy ending (x)

no ship

a million dreams || 1.9k || roman angst with an unspecified relationship; unhappy ending (x)

falling victim to your fantasy || 2.6k || a murder mystery fic co-written with the incomparable heavenly-roman for the fandom games featuring many a platonic relationship and a lovely helping of roman angst; unhappy ending (x)

black tears || 300 || vent fic featuring a sad logan and color metaphors; unhappy ending (x)

prinxiety

✧ just like broken glass || 4.8k || for cloudsky331’s birthday in 2019, human au with past prinxiety written in first person; bittersweet ending (x)

roceit

watching the sunrise replace the moon || 2k || hurt/comfort with established roceit; hopeful ending (x)

the stars are fading (so am i) || 1.2k || post putting others first angst with past (and possibly future) roceit; hopeful/ambiguous ending (x)

kiss me goodbye (i’m defying gravity) || 1.5k || fic inspired by an art piece, guardian angel!janus tries to save prince roman; hopeful-leaning-happy ending (x)

ambition!roman || 1.1k || a headcanon about a corrupted version of roman, elaborated on more below:

ambitions taken to the extreme || 650

the aftermath || 1k

virgil’s relationship with him || 942

chaptered fics and series: tumblr masterpost || word count || brief description // chapter on tumblr (chapter on ao3) || etc

loceit

light up the dark || 1.3k || initially based on the tags on this post by coconut-cluster but then got out of hand and turned into some very prose-y loceit; my unfinished symphony, forever unfinished

see the stars (x) || empty sky (x) || spark of gold (x) || a night so bright (x) || city lights (x) || starlit kisses (x)

logince

feels like love || 7.3k || canon divergence, major character death and how that affects both the living and the dead, past (or present, depending on which part you read) logince, each could be read as a stand-alone one shot; unhappy ending

never enough (x) || two slow dancers (x) || missing you (x)

✧ to fall in love || 12.6k || for ari-the-anxious-ace’s secret santa gift, a siren!logan and prince!roman au, somewhat forbidden pining; unhappy ending (x)

✧ can’t help falling in love with you || 16.2k || for ren’s birthday, a ‘you’ve got mail’ inspired high school au with friends to lovers and enemies to friends to lovers logince (plus a side of platonic roceit consisting almost entirely of janus calling roman a simp); happy ending

only fools rush in (x) || like a river flows (x) || some things are meant to be (x)

roceit

devils don’t fly || 4.5k || dragon witch!deceit au featuring mutual pining and eventual roceit; my unfinished symphony, forever unfinished

when i’m gone, remember you’re the one (x) || and just because i fight (x) || don’t mean that i never learned how to love (x)

unspecified

brave the dark (hiatus of unknown length) || 3.4k || a victorian era murder mystery au featuring a whole cast of morally grey characters and major character death; my unfinished symphony, forever unplanned

the dark’s not taking prisoners tonight (x) || etc

100 follower celebration: tumblr || word count || who sent the prompt + brief description (ao3)

were you dazzled by the same constellation? || 1.1k || main-chive’s prompt, analogical getting together with obliviously pining logan; happy ending (x)

magic au || 600 || llumimoon’s prompt, world building for an au i will never write featuring (primarily) roman angst, roceit, and analogical

here, blinking in the starlight || 4.1k || sign-from-god-complex’s prompt, rivals to lovers roceit with platonic logince and analogical as well as brotherly anxceit; happy ending (x)

black hole sun || 6.5k || main-chive’s prompt, extremely self-indulgent superhero au featuring a whole cast of lesbians and eventual roceit or anaroceit (i’m still undecided); my unfinished symphony, forever unfinished (won’t you come (x), wash away the rain (x) )

other fandoms:

good omens; ineffable husbands

✦✧ sic semper ad astra || 5.4k || for a past friend’s birthday in 2020, featuring pining pre-fall crowley and slightly oblivious aziraphale; unhappy ending (but with the promise of a happy one since it takes place before the events of the show/book) (x)

#mcyt #dsmp #last life #sanders sides #good omens #writing arc #masterpost

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pontsalin · 5 years ago

Text

Au masterpost

With summaries and links for each!

There may be aus that I’ve never talked about before, so if you’re interested in hearing more about them, shoot me an ask about it (you can also ask me if you want to hear more about an au I’ve posted about)!

Quirk au (crossover with BNHA)

@ask-vigilante-virgil

Summary: Virgil is a vigilante, fighting the crime at night with his best friend Remy. Everything is fine until Virgil gets caught in something much bigger than he thought.

Info about their quirks:

Virgil, Logan, Patton and Roman

Remy

Deceit and Emile

General info about them (desktop only)

Read from the start (desktop only)

Ships: Eventual LAMP, established remile, eventual RED, past sleepxiety

Tw: Morally grey Patton, unsympathetic Remus, sympathetic Deceit

Monster au

Summary: In a world where monsters exist, but are feared by humans, Logan and Patton create a school for fantastic creatures, to make a safe space where they can learn to control their powers and get a proper education.

Design of the main sides

General infos about them

More lore infos about them

Tag: monster au

Ships: Eventual LAMP, originally analogical and royality, but has been built to be more prinxiety + logicality

Tw: Morally grey Roman, Morally grey Deceit

Shugo Chara au (crossover)

Summary: Thomas wakes up with three eggs in this bed, each one representing an hidden desire. Then a fourth egg. Then a fifth egg? What?

Their design + the backstory

Tag: Shugo Chara au

Ships: None

Somewhat swapped au

Summary: Swap au + Highschool au where the sides are swapped but still keep a part of their canon character.

Who’s swapped:

Virgil/ Patton

Logan/ Roman

Remy/ Emile

Deceit/ Remus

Their designs

Tag: Somewhat swapped au

Ships: Slow burn LAMP, eventual remile, platonic demus

Tw: Sympathetic Deceit and Remus

Gem au (crossover with Steven Universe)

Summary: Roman, Logan, Patton and Thomas form the Crystal Gems, defending the Earth against the odd.

Their designs

Tag: gem au

Ships: Eventual LAMP

WlW au (genderbend au)

Summary: Human au where the sides are girls.

Their designs + their body types here

Tag: wlw au

Ships: Prinxiety, loreceit, remile

Tw: Sympathetic Deceit and Remus

Sun and Moon au

Summary: Au where the sides are spirits of a specific thing, and Thomas is a kid curious about them.

Their designs

Tag: Sun and moon au

Ships: LAMPD, remile, eventual Remy/ Emile/ Remus

Tw: Sympathetic Deceit, morally grey Remus

Fnaf au (crossover)

Summary: Each sides are animatronics living in a circus and entertaining kids.

Their designs + a bit of their story

Tag: fnaf au

Ships: None

Tw: Morally grey everyone

The Greatest Showman au (crossover)

Summary:

Roman: P.T Barnum

Patton: Charity Barnum

Logan: Phillip Carlyle

Virgil: Anne Wheeler

Deceit: Jenny Lind

Ships: Royality, Analogical

Tw: unsympathetic Deceit

Ghostbusters au

Summary: Logan and Patton are two ghosbusters, catching the troubling ghosts.

Their designs + backstory/ plot

Ships: Eventual moxiety, eventual logince, past anxceit

Spider Virgil au

Summary: Deceit being a snake, and Remus an octopus, so Virgil being a spider (more precisely a chilean rose hair tarantula) would be fitting, right?

Art

Ships: Undecided

Gaming au

Summary: Logan is twitch streamer, Patton has a gaming channel and Virgil and Roman owns together a gmaing channel too. Damien is their editor.

Details of their channels

Ships: Slow burn DLAMP

Tw: Sympathetic Deceit

Witch au

Summary: Logan enters a school for witchcraft and gets to meet other witches, and learns that science and magic are one and the same.

Ships: Undecided

Angel/ Demon au

Summary: Virgil tries to summon a demon, but an angel tries to prevent him from doing it. He’s now roomate with the two of them.

Art

Ships: Prinxiety, eventual moxiety, undecided

Golden soul au

Summary: Soulmate where your dreams are linked to your soulmate(s). You can't remember their face or name, but when you wake you got golden dust where your soulmate touched you. (Original post)

Roman and Logan are soulmates, except Roman lives in Europe while Logan lives in America. They barely get sleep at the same time, and for the longest time thought the two of them didn’t have soulmates, until Patton (Logan’s friend) shows Roman’s youtube channel to him.

Ships: Logince, moxiety, RED

Unconventional pets au

Summary: Virgil likes pets that aren’t universally loved. He likes spiders, frogs, snakes, mantis etc.

His dads (Logan and Patton) try their best to support him, but Patton’s fear of most of those pets isn’t ideal. Virgil gets to meet another snake lover, Dee.

Logan and Patton are also trying to fix their gay crisis, since they’re both crushing hard on that cute genderfluid baker down the street (Roman).

Ships: Anxceit, established Logicality, future morolo

Tw: Sympathetic Deceit and Remus

Secret Identity au

Summary: Heroes need to hide their faces to preserve their identity. Shenanigans insues.

Powers:

Logan: Can create portals on flat surfaces

Patton: None. Masters white weapons.

Roman: Invisibility

Virgil: Can control the weather, and has a small orb that changes shape depending on his mood (sad= rainy etc.)

Deceit: Animal shapeshifter

Remus: None. Is the voice that co ordinates them in the mic.

Emile: Blood bending

Remy: Can go into other’s people dreams

Ships: Logicality, Remus x Deceit x Virgil, Roman x Remy x Emile

- Hero! Logan and Hero! Patton make out after the fights, but Logan can’t stand Patton irl.

- Deceit and Remus are dating, and Virgil is very jealous of Remus. Though he really likes the voice that talks to them during fights.

Tw: Sympathetic Deceit and Remus

Creepy au

Summary: Logan is a curious kid. Patton is always smiling. Roman has many friends. Virgil will never leave his brother’s side. Four outcasts dealing with supernatural stuff.

Logan is a young scientist with a lot of motivation.

Patton is a new demon.

Roman sees dead people.

Virgil has a plush possessed by a demon.

Ships: None

Cryptid au

Summary: Roman has a youtube channel where he does urbex with Virgil (bfu style), and make rant videos about how cryptid are beautiful and he’d love to date one.

Plot twist. Virgil is mothman, and sticks with Roman to protect him since he has a very bad luck and attracts every bad spirits.

Logan has a youtube channel where he debunks myth (from the flat earth to supernatural stuff). He does not believe in anything supernatural, except that his best friend Patton is a fae that has claimed him.

Ships: Prinxiety, Logicality

Mermaid au

Summary: Roman is a human who has always been fascinated by the ocean. Little does the know that his mother was the same.

Roman: Human

Remus: Octomaid

Deceit: Human

Logan: Octomaid

Virgil: Shark mermaid

Patton: Seal mermaid

French Highschool au

Summary: Highschool au happening in France because I’m tired to see every highschool au being in the US.

Logan: S, overworks himself to the point of doing burnouts because he needs to be the best.

Virgil: S, is ahead of pretty much all classes due to his anxiety. Often beats Logan during tests.

Roman: S, pressured by his parents to go in the scientific course, doesn’t work but still gets good grades. He hates himself each time his executive dysfunction makes him not working.

Patton: ES, tries his best, works a lot but still struggles to get more than average grades.

Deceit: L, average. He gets average grades and work an average ammount of time. He’s the stereotypical L that smokes and is bad at math.

Remus: Redoublant, gets the new school system, struggles to work.

Emile: Biology / science and life of the Earth teacher

Remy: Math teacher

Thomas: French Teacher

Ships: Analogical, roceit, intruality, remile

Patton’s design

Doodles (second and third pics)

Ships: Logince, moxiety, demus

Steampunk au

Summary: The high and middle class live on a floating island, unknowingly (or not) abusing on the people living on the ground.

Deceit: Originally from the lower city, he’s one of the few that knows how to travel down (or up).

Remus: Son of the King, does not know anything about what’s happening bellow. Deceit conviced him to go to the lower city.

Roman: Son of the King, knew what was happening in the lower city, and escaped many years ago. Presumed dead. Patton’s fiancé.

Patton: Comes from the lower city, managed to go on the island as a courtesan. Went back down with Roman when he escaped.

Virgil: From the lower city, one of the greatest engineer of the Kingdom. Made Patton’s prothesis, Deceit’s monocle and his own fake eyes.

Logan: Middle class, works as a cop chasing people escaping the island. Constantly running after Deceit.

Ship: Dukexiety, Royality, Loceit

Sudden Monsters au

Summary: The sides gets transformed one after the other as monsters. A great excuse to talk about feelings and overcome fears.

Virgil: Drider (half spider)

Deceit: Naga

Remus: Octomaid

Roman: Mermaid

Logan: Centaur (but half unicorn)

Patton: Werewolf (is always an humanoid canid, but gets violent during the full moon)

Ships: Moxiety, undecided

Eldritch au

Summary: Virgil meets the monster under his bed. He is actually really sweet.

More talk there

Ship: Dukexiety, eventual Logince

Lost kids au

Summary: Virgil and Remus run away from the orphanage they were in, and decides to sleep in an abandoned house. The creature (Deceit) living there decides to take care of them.

Rpg au

Summary: The sides meet on a mmorpg and creates a team.

Roman: Tank, werewolf

Logan: Long range dps, elf

Patton: Summoner/ necromancian, human

Virgil: Healer, spider specie

Deceit: Rogue, snake specie

Remus: Short range dps, human

Ships: Established moxiety, slow burn lomus, roceit

Alien Runaway au

Summary: Logan is a scientist working in a space station. An alien arrives, badly injuried. The crew saves him, and keep him safe until he gets better. His name is Roman, and he’s willing to talk (with ASL) only to Logan.

Roman, Remus, Emile and Deceit are aliens.

Logan, Virgil, Patton and Remy are human scientists.

Marvel au

Virgil is Natasha

Patton is Cap

Logan is Bruce

Roman is Thor

Deceit is Loki

Remy is Tony

Ships: Undecided

Overwatch au

May be a crack au. Idk I was just in a ovw mood when I made it.

Roman: D.Va

Logan: Symmetra

Patton: Mercy

Virgil: Reaper (following the theory that Reaper is infiltrated in Talon)

Deceit: Moira or Roadhog

Remus: Junkrat

Fusion au

Summary: Fusion au where the fusions are piece of chess

Doodles

Souleater au

I do not know yet, but it’s somewhere in my mind

Sherlock au

sherlock - virgil

watson - remus

moriarty - roman

irene - patton

mycroft - dee

lestrade - logan

#i'll edit this as a i go #au masterpost #sanders sides #ts sides #ts au #sol mumbles

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accidentally-logince · 6 years ago

Text

Rules of Being a Light Side

If you missed the first one: Rules of Being a Dark Side

Also, this was gonna just be a little continuation of the first one, but uhhhhhh there’s gonna be a third part too.

Warnings: Crying, anger, hate, mentions of pain, self-deprecation (Please tell me if there are any more)

Word Count: 2.3k

Pairings: Pining Loceit

A couple things in here were inspired by art, so I’m gonna put links to this post by @dailydeceitdoodles that inspired the “Lavender” part of the story, and this post by @casdensi for the ending and the idea of the “wilting”

---

There were more flowers in here. Weren't there more? Deceit runs his hands over the petals, thinking. Perhaps he'd put them in a different box. He leans down awkwardly to open the cupboard that he keep all the roses in. Again, he frowns. The boxes all seem slightly... off. Each is nearly overflowing—he'll most definitely need a new box soon—but Deceit could have sworn...

He shakes his head. Stupid thoughts. As if he needed to keep the flowers anyway. And who would even be taking them?

---

Deceit hadn't spoken to Logan at all since his attempted confession. Nearly three weeks, and Logan hadn't even tried to interact with him. He hardly stays in the same room as Deceit. The most they'd seen each other was in a video, and even then, Logan's eyes never wandered to Deceit's corner, words never sent in his direction. All but ignoring the lying Side. Deceit had learned to ignore the pain in his chest—maybe, he thought, he'd left a thorn or two in there, since heartbreak couldn't possibly feel this agonizing.

It's quiet in the commons. Which is to be expected, as it's nearly four in the morning, though not even a faint hum of music from Virgil's room, or the sounds of sparring that come when Roman's room is changed from a full kingdom to just a small bedroom, the bright night sky being replaced with fairy lights.

Deceit stays quiet as he sneaks out the door. He can't risk anyone following him, where he's going.

The door of the mindscape doesn't lead to Thomas' apartment building. Only a large expanse of grass, seeming to span out in all directions. There's a mostly established area around the outer mindscape. It looks big, but there are limits to it.

A twenty minute walk yields the entrance to a forest. Far enough away that no one would find it unless they were looking for it. Or maybe, if they just wandered randomly. Maybe that's why Deceit didn't make it farther away. Some part of him half hoped that Logan would happen upon it. Though he probably wouldn't even know what it meant.

The rest of the walk doesn't take much longer. Only a few minutes into the trees is an opening, blooming with roses. Red, and white, and yellow. So, so much yellow. There are so many more roses than the ones Deceit keeps in his tiny desk and the space under his bed.

If Deceit kept every flower in his room, they'd have been found by now. So he made the meadow as another sort of storage area, where he could come to make them where no one would see them.

He sits down in the center of the meadow, cross-legged. A Deceit-sized circle in the center of all the roses was left untouched so he could sit with them surrounding him. As much as they hurt when they would appear, they have sentimental value. Each rose represents a time that Deceit went against his primary function, and, all of these at least, made for Logan.

The silence is utterly deafening in here. There's no wind in the mindscape, and Deceit decides to keep it that way, rather than make his own and disturb the atmosphere of the forest. Instead, he begins to speak.

Nonsense at first. Absolutely anything that his brain can conjure, spilling from his mouth without thought. But it always comes back to Logan. Each time he comes here, Deceit inevitably ends up rambling on and on about Logan, watching roses sprout over his skin and in the dirt. The ones that grow in the ground still hurt, it just seems much easier, Deceit thinks, to have them already in the ground so he doesn't have to plant them.

By the time Deceit pushes himself to his feet—after plucking all the roses out of his skin and planting them, talking through the whole process—his voice is raw; It nearly hurts to breathe. His skin is sore too, a familiar soreness that comes with the growth of the roses. He stares at the last flower for a moment before turning and making his way back to the mouth of the forest.

---

It's just past seven in the morning when Deceit finally gets back to the commons. It won't be long before the Light Sides wake up, so Deceit silently wanders down the stairs, stumbling through his bleary vision. His trip to the forest had left him tired--he hadn't gotten any sleep last night--and he wanted nothing more than to collapse onto his bed and pass out.

As his hand reaches for the doorknob, Deceit freezes. Shuffling comes from inside, the movement of cardboard and plastic across wood. He can feel his heart begin to beat hard against his ribs at the prospect of someone finding his roses.

What if they know what they mean?

No longer tentative, Deceit thrusts the door open, eliciting a startled gasp from the intruder. His eyes lock with Deceit's for a split second before he quickly sinks out, though not before Dee can notice the roses piled up in his arms.

Deceit's mouth goes dry. There was no mistaking Logan's trademark tie and glasses. He scrambles to the cupboard, throwing it open and checking the boxes. He knew they looked empty! But how long had Logan been stealing them? How much did he know?

Forgetting his fatigue entirely, Deceit marches up the stairs to the Light Sides' rooms, not stopping to knock before barging into Logan's room. He's under his blankets, and pushes the sheet off to sit up.

"Deceit, what in the world are you doing in my room?"

The lying Side is at a loss for words for a few moments before sputtering out, "I couldn't easily ask you the same," keeping careful not to tell the truth, though a rose had already sprouted on his calf from even entering Logan's room.

Logan grumbles, rolling his eyes and reaching for his glasses that sit on the bedside table. "I'm far too tired for this, Deceit, please go back to your own room." He rubs at his sleep-filled eyes before placing his glasses on his nose.

Deceit blinks stupidly, almost fooled for a moment. "You weren't just in my room!" He just hardly keeps the hiss out of his voice.

Again, Logan sighs, annoyed, before pushing himself off of his bed and snapping his fingers, poofing on the same outfit that Deceit had just seen him wearing while he stole the roses.

"You're tired, Deceit. You've been up all night. Is it at all possible that you were simply seeing things?"

At that, Deceit pauses. Thomas' imagination is one of the largest parts of the mindscape, and it's not unusual for some of it to leak out of Roman's room. A tired Side is no stranger to hallucinations; manticores and elves running about the kitchen in the long hours of the night. His mind probably conjured up an image of Logan stealing the roses because he'd been paranoid about his seemingly emptying boxes earlier.

Deceit clears his throat, embarrassed now that he could have very easily just barged into Logan's room without reason. "I don't apologize. I believe I won't be going then."

"Try to get some sleep. You really seem to need it," Logan says, crossing his arms, waiting for Deceit to leave. His feet are planted in place, stiff from exhaustion now that his adrenaline is gone, and he sinks out back to his room, falling onto his bed in an awkward position in a desperate plea for any form of sleep.

It's only as Deceit is just falling asleep that he wonders how Logan had known he was up last night at all.

--- When Deceit wakes up again, it's midday. A glance at the clock reveals that it's nearly three in the afternoon. Deceit flips himself over and stretches--he really shouldn't have fallen asleep when he was half off of the bed--before he remembers what had happened before he sank out of Logan's room. A scowl makes its way onto his face.

The "hallucination" alibi had worked for Logan when Deceit was tired, but now that he was fully awake and in control of his thoughts, it made no sense. Logan could have very easily risen up into his room after stealing the roses and poofed on his pajamas. There was no reason that Deceit shouldn't do any investigating.

Quietly, he rose up into the kitchen, wincing but ultimately staying quiet as a rose bloomed on his arm. Peering over the counter confirmed the rose's reason; Logan was sitting on the couch, laptop on his lap as he typed, a show playing in the background. That made it much easier.

Now knowing that Logan was downstairs, Deceit rises up into his room. The lights are off, but there's dim sunlight coming from the window, and Deceit decides not to flick the lightswitch as he saunters around the room, checking all the drawers and cupboards he can find.

He had to admit, he nearly closed the drawer without noticing the strange leveling. The bottom of the drawer didn't match up. It looked too shallow on the inside. Deceit pressed a hand to the bottom of the drawer and felt it slide, revealing an opening that was much bigger on the inside than could possibly fit in the drawer. He pushed the false bottom further, enough that he could fit himself in.

Inside, once he'd found his bearings--it was very strange to suddenly be in a drawer--he saw boxes of roses much like his own. There must have been years worth in here. How could Logan possibly have known about them for this long? He felt anger boiling in his chest. Logan knew about them. And he had lied to Deceit. He had let Deceit get hurt, and he knew.

Deceit took a step forward, his foot catching on something. He looks down to find a lavender flower under his foot. His brow furrows. Had that been there a moment ago?

When he places his foot down again, more lavender sprouts. A few more stems this time around his foot, but they were very clearly coming from him. Was this a new type of flower? Did it have to do with his anger? He reached up to brush a strand of hair out of his face, only to find that there were more lavender flowers growing in his hair.

Feeling tears forming behind his eyes--he didn't know if they were of anger towards Logan or fear at the lavender--Deceit quickly rose up into Logan's room. replacing the drawer's false bottom, then sink down into his own room, feeling the glare on his face grow colder. Logan let him get hurt.

"I hate him," Deceit growled. "He hurt me, I hate him!"

Deceit fell to the ground as a sharp pain ran through his chest. At first he thought it was another rose, but no, he'd felt one grow on his neck just now. The pain in his chest felt different, and something urged him to look at his roses.

He crawled over to his desk and opened the cupboard, gasping when he saw the yellow roses wilting to grey. More tears pushed at his eyes and he grabbed for the flowers desperately, distantly noticing that lavender was still sprouting around his feet and legs as he knelt, pulling the boxes out.

"No, no, please don't," he whimpered. "Please, please, don't!" The roses were too special for him to lose. Logan had hurt him... but Deceit didn't hate him, did he?

Through his tear-stained vision, Deceit noticed the flowers turning yellow again. His brow furrowed, and he wiped his tears away. Still yellow. What in the world had just happened? As the confusion ebbed, his anger slowly started to return, but the flowers turned grey. Again, Deceit frantically held them against him, and their colour returned.

The flowers wilt when their truth becomes a lie.

The thought scared Deceit for a moment. He didn't hate Logan. Not at all. And each of these flowers had been a forbidden "I Love You" that Deceit had uttered when he was alone. But the colour was still in the roses, so the Rules knew he still loved Logan. Though in that moment of anger, he had truly believed he hadn't.

Then, an idea sprouted in Deceit's mind. He stood, ignoring the lavender that still grew at his feet with each new step, sat on his bed, right in the middle. He let his angry thoughts come back, and he growled out "I hate him" as many times as he could, until the words lost all meaning, and the Rules stopped counting them.

No more roses sprouted, and only then, did he open his eyes and see that hi skin was absolutely covered in yellow roses. It reminded him of all the nights Deceit had spent murmuring "I love him" to himself. That thought alone is enough to make the hateful roses wilt, and he watches as the "I Love You" roses in his cupboard boxes came back to yellow as their meanings became truths again.

Deceit grins down at the grey roses on his skin. He stands, moving to the bathroom to pluck them out.

---

When Logan went back into his room in the evening, he was stopped short right in front of his door. Plastered right in front of the doorway were bouquets upon bouquets of dead, grey roses, strewn about on the floor, over his doorway, and all over a large board that had the words carved into it:

"Everything Wilts. They Just Need A Reason."

---

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clearlynotjanus · 3 years ago

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Loceit Appreciation Week: Day Two, Crook/Aftermath

READ ON AO3

Chapter Summary: As the aftermath of choosing to attend Lee & Mary-Lee's wedding over Thomas' big acting break approaches, Janus extends Logan an unprecedented olive branch that results in the pair inadvertently working together.

CW: Drinking mention, very brief religion mention, philosophy Word Count: 3703 Genre: Gen, Hurt/comfort Rating: Gen Ships: Slowburn Loceit, pre-established Dukeceit, pre-established Intrulogical, slowburn intruloceit

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April 13th was rapidly approaching and with each passing hour, Thomas sank deeper into denial. Indecision welled as he went back and forth on the subject matter; callback or wedding, callback or wedding, the opportunity of a lifetime or a petty social engagement -- ugh. There was nothing resolute about his choice, about Roman’s choice. It was impulsive, fueled by the short lived desire to be seen as a good person. The kicker was that, even though Thomas was beginning to see this much, it didn’t matter. He would continue burying the realization under mounds of repression while justifying his discontent every way he could manage, grasping at every straw and still coming up short.

And Janus was supposed to help him, obviously. Repression may have been Patton’s speciality at times, but lying was his jurisdiction; even and especially when those lies were told to himself -- Thomas’ self. He was expected to disregard the resentment in his heart and perform his function. Well, if Thomas could make questionable decisions, then so could Janus, and he decided that they would all find it very difficult to cope when Thomas suddenly found himself incapable of lying on the wretched day. Maybe then Janus’ argument would be taken seriously -- but that was assuming Thomas would even notice.

Stewing in these thoughts, Janus shifted in his seat. Remus, used to his malcontented fidgeting, never spared a glance, however Logan seemed to finally have had enough.

“Are you alright, Janus?” Logan asked from his position, diagonal from the other. His tone was more annoyed and straightforward than concerned. He had genuinely been interested in the show Remus had put on but found it impossible to concentrate with Janus’ excessive sighing and movement.

“I suppose,” Janus lamented, resuming his contemplative silence. Perturbed, Logan adjusted his glasses and resigned himself to sitting back.

“Well, if there’s anything to be done,” Logan offered mindlessly, allowing his sentence to trail off as his focus resumed on the television.

“Well there is one thing,” Janus seized the opportunity after a brief pause, leaning forward with a hushed tone. Logan blinked at the sudden intensity of Janus’ charm.

“And that would be?” He responded dubiously, glancing almost nervously at Remus who seemed utterly absorbed by the show, sparing no attention to either of them. Similarly, Janus opened his mouth to begin speaking, but then inhaled as he registered the fact of Remus in the room still.

“Join me in the kitchen for a moment?” Janus stood fluidly, “I think we could use a drink,” he excused the thinly veiled shift before turning and exiting for the kitchen.

Confused, Logan sat up, only then realizing how much he had leaned towards Janus in the moment. The back of his neck itched with a familiar heat and he cleared his throat.

“I guess I’ll be--” Logan started to explain but Remus quickly waved a hand and shhhh’d him aggressively. With a small smile, Logan pressed a brief kiss to his boyfriend’s cheek, earning a soft sound of appreciation before standing and following after Janus.

Logan entered as Janus finished pouring a second glass of wine. Assuming the other already filled was for him, Logan accepted and rested a hip against the counter. He crossed an arm under his elbow and watched Janus cap the wine with expectation in his raised chin, but Janus didn’t start speaking until he brought the glass to his lips.

“Something’s coming, you do realize,” he said while meeting Logan’s eyes carefully, his voice low and smooth like a secret. Janus followed his sentence with a slow sip. Logan took the pause to formulate his answer.

“That depends entirely on what you mean by ‘something,’” Logan replied hesitantly, but with a loosely concealed air of knowing.

The date of Lee and Mary-Lee’s wedding was of little importance to him, though the ramifications on Thomas’ stress levels were vexing. The two were connected, obviously, Logan wasn’t so ignorant as to pretend otherwise; however, he couldn’t empathize nor sympathize with Thomas’ decision -- or Roman’s decision, rather. If providing support for his friends was truly paramount, then why was Thomas stressed? He was unable to sleep soundly despite understanding Remus’ behavior now. Similarly unable to concentrate on work, thoughtlessly picking at his food, distracted by persistent and troubling thoughts of guilt, remorse, and failure.

“But yes,” Logan shook his head, conceding. “Something is coming and we’re all bound to talk in circles again.” He sighed and took a sip that quickly turned into a gulp from his glass.

“They never do listen to you,” Janus pointed out sympathetically and Logan frowned, looking away. “That isn’t your fault, of course,” he quickly soothed the burning truth but Logan remained silent for several long moments. Before he spoke again, he brought his glass up for another long drink.

“It is true though,” Logan admitted with a sigh. It was Janus’ turn to frown. They were all so ignorant to ignore Logic of all sides. How Logan had kept his patience for this long was beyond him.

“I don’t know how to make them listen,” Logan whispered, stare unfocused across the room. “Sometimes they do but,” his shoulders deflated and he rolled his eyes back up to Janus’ face, his lips lined in resigned disappointment. “More frequently they take my lessons in the opposite direction and come up with some alternative and pointless meaning,” Exasperation leaked into his tone. Janus exhaled in the following silence.

“Well, my favor,” he started after a moment and Logan blinked up, suddenly remembering what this conversation was supposed to be about, “with that in mind, is less for me than it is for you.”

Logan’s brows creased as his eyes narrowed, not in suspicion but in confusion. He opened his mouth, intending to ask how that could possibly be, but his breath was quickly stolen by Janus’ delicate hand on his shoulder as he began to leave.

“When the time comes,” Janus whispered almost directly into Logan’s ear as he leaned in. Goosebumps raised along his arms and his stomach knotted in a way he was beginning to associate with Janus specifically. “Rely on me.”

- - - - -

Another debate spent as an observer, reduced to an annoying popup ad not even most of the audience bothered to pause for; too enthralled with the meaningless, cyclical conversation enduring above. At least Logan could console himself with the idea that some people were reading what he had to say. Thomas, at the very least, already knew everything he was saying. Logic wasn’t a feeling after all but something deeply embedded. A fact that only added fuel to the fire of frustration but that wasn’t something he was concentrating on currently.

Then Patton finally asked for his input directly. Logan already knew that Patton wouldn’t like what he had to say, but it was what Thomas needed to hear; the reality that’s been lying underneath every decision they’ve ever made. It was something Patton actively avoided thinking about. The fact was that his view and use of empathy was far more akin to pity, a feeling that only thinly veiled the nihilistic complex Morality had gotten entangled with in Thomas’ youth. “God,” “fate,” and “nothingness;” were all just terms for relinquishing control of one’s life. A habit that was clearly getting Thomas into situations that weighed on him heavily.

Logan began with reciting the source material: pity runs counter to the instincts that preserve and enhance the value of life. Friedrich Nietzche’s The Anti-Christ. A fantastic read about Nietzsche's claim that Christianity is a poisoner of western culture with its inherent apathy central to westernization. That wasn’t the first sentence nor was it the opening statement of the section he was referring to, but it was a perfectly adequate summary. However Logan didn’t even finish half of his following sentence explaining Nietzche’s philosophy before a yellow and black button appeared on his textbox. Skip all -- click. No hesitation.

No second thought.

Well, Logan did say that he was making his facts optional this time.

Something hard suddenly wrapped around his throat and the next thing Logan knew, he was being violently torn away from the scene.

Upright on his feet, he landed in a familiar place. Blinking around the shadowy corners of the Dark Side living room, Logan cleared his throat and adjusted his tie with tense hands. How unnecessarily brutal, he thought.

“Oh hey, Lolo!” Remus greeted from the couch, suddenly realizing his forced entrance. “De -- I mean Jan just left!” A pause. “Wait,” he said slowly like he suspected them of something, but when he continued, he sounded humored again. “Did he send you to babysit me while he went and fucked with the Light Sides?”

Logan sighed, shoulders deflating. “It seems that way,” He conceded, piecing different puzzle pieces together but still getting the same result as Remus. “What are you doing, then,” Logan asked in a rather flat and tired tone as he sat down next to his boyfriend, who proceeded to gush about the diagram he had been sketching for a new building in his Duchy.

Logan guessed Janus had sent him here, in proximity and obligation to Remus, rather than stewing by himself in his room in case he found himself disagreeing with how this had been handled. Which he did, but only with the execution, and not enough to stop Janus at this point. Rely on me, Janus had said a few days ago now and at the time Logan had clammed up from the situation. Janus’ lips pressed against his ear, a hand on his shoulder, wine coursing through his blood; his mind had raced with possibilities and it wasn’t until now that Logan realized what a brilliant set up it had been.

Hopefully Janus got through to the others easier than him. Historically that hadn’t been the case yet but there was a severe lack of data to infer from. Logan had many chances to convince the others of various rationale at this point. Janus had only the opportunity twice. It was only fair that Logan would rely on him then, and try not to be bitter about it. They had been getting nowhere when he was involved and the only Side Logan could blame was Patton.

Minutes ticked by before Logan detected an opening for further input. Janus struggled with his metaphor, faltered and Logic appeared. Not that any of you care, he began speaking only really to Patton and Roman, but I am unharmed. Janus reacted negatively, perhaps assuming Logan was upset with him for the intrusion -- And I don’t want to talk about it. He wasn’t upset. At least not with Janus.

His explanation ensued and in a rare occurrence, everyone listened. Whether that was due to Janus having gotten their attention focused on the issue at hand or Logan finally having a convincing argument, in the moment he wasn’t sure. However nothing really spoke to the fact that Janus was an emotionally inclined Side more than the way he reacted to Logan putting a legitimate name to his stance; Effective Altruism. His expression was full of clear fascination at being taught something, intrigue to know more, attentive listening; it was Janus’ debut discussion on the stage all over again. The first time Logan had been so explicitly asked for frequent contributions in what had felt like forever. Logan easily fell back into the comforting feeling of being heard -- before sinking out and preventing himself from witnessing anymore absurd contradictions.

After leaving of his own volition to his room, Logan fell back on his bed with a sigh and removed his glasses. Everything was very difficult, he thought, pinching the bridge of his nose; and it would always be difficult as long as Patton continued to be so frustratingly obtuse. Well, at least Janus got it, but seeing that he had an easier time getting through to the others felt bitter. It really did boil down to some … fallacy of Logic, didn’t it.

Logan lost track of time in the mire of his thoughts, at some point having opened his eyes to stare blindly at the ceiling. Everything had calmed down in the living room it seemed. Thomas was now preoccupied with his friends and the Sides were released to continue with their day. Only Logan wasn’t sure what it was he should be doing. A familiar question floated through his mind like an astringently sweet memory; was he even necessary?

“Well don’t you look comfy.”

“Janus,” Logan sat up and rushed to shove his glasses on.

“Oh sorry,” Janus whispered, gesturing with a limp wrist. “Was I interrupting? Were you experiencing an emotion? Should I leave?” Janus teased with drama in his soft voice. Logan cleared his throat.

“Considering you’re already here, no,” He stood and adjusted his tie. “Why are you here? I thought everything was taken care of.”

“It is,” Janus reassured smugly but then slowly crossed the room towards Logan, his eyes and fingertips indulgently dragging along the books lining the wall. “Are you saying I can’t visit?” He paused in front of Logan with pouting lips and a hurt expression. Standing a few inches too close, he reached a gloved hand to smooth the back of Logan’s mussed bed hair. “Check up on you?”

“I didn’t say that.” Heat overtook his face as he quickly looked away, dislodging the hand in his hair with the movement. “You can. I just wasn’t expecting you.” Janus frowned.

“I don’t know why,” he replied, quietly astounded. Didn’t they have an agreement? Why wouldn’t he come to...debrief or whatever after all that? Janus’ lips pursed in a wounded expression as he watched Logan take steps away, looking everywhere but up at him. “That’s beside the point however.” He huffed a soft sigh and tilted his head, attempting to meet Logan’s eyes. “You’re very angry, aren’t you?” He guessed. For once Logan wasn’t denying any of his emotions which was both progress and rather troublesome. The misguided assumption prompted Logan to finally acknowledge his gaze again at least. Janus thought his face was rather unreadable.

“No,” Logan shook his head, giving his own heavy sigh. “Frustrated,” he admitted like Janus was pulling his teeth.

Janus hummed with understanding, raising his chin with a nod. “Well I apologize,” He offered seriously, lifting half of his mouth in a genuine expression. “Perhaps I should’ve been a tad more explicit beforehand,” Janus shrugged shallowly, willing to admit his fault. “It did work however, so I thank you for relying on me. As ... difficult as that may have been.” Janus finished, all too aware of how manipulated Logan might feel; how artificial the moments of closeness they had together lately must suddenly seem -- and while Janus wouldn’t put that sort of thing past himself, it wasn’t true in this case.

“No,” Logan shook his head, blinking at Janus’ seriousness. “I’m not frustrated with you,” he explained slowly, diverted from his frustration for a moment in the misunderstanding.

“You’re not?” Confusion mixed with intrigue on Janus’ face. “Well, what are you frustrated with then?”

Logan rapped knuckles against his desk in thought, looking away from Janus again and down at the action. It was with pride that he regarded himself as Thomas’ language center. Words came easily to him, most of the time. Struggling to phrase things wasn’t an obstacle he faced frequently. However, more often than not, Janus made this part of his job difficult. At the same time, it wasn’t something he’d blame Janus for. It wasn’t Janus’ fault Logan thought he was captivating, distracting. Beautiful.

Logan’s knuckles went still on the desk. “As usual, I find myself frustrated with emotions.” Janus’ brow twitched; was it not just frustration he was feeling? Was there something more he couldn’t articulate? “More specifically,” Logan continued and rolled his eyes back up at Janus, “I’m frustrated with Patton, which is nothing new.”

“Ahh,” Janus breathed, the sound turning into a gentle chuckle. If he had been worried, the concern began to melt away. “Yes,” he nodded slowly, “I can easily imagine that.” Janus thought on their own interaction before his arrival here, in Logan’s room. It was ... very awkward. Patton seemed unwilling to discuss the matter further, or perhaps Janus had just been trying to beat a dead horse. “He’s very naive and difficult to communicate with.” Janus scrunched his nose.

Historically, he had an easy enough time understanding Patton. He was soft, liked to see the best in people even when he had very clear evidence not to. Patton was emotional and stubborn. There wasn’t anything too complicated about him that Janus didn’t get. It was when he attempted to employ the reverse of Patton understanding him where tragedy struck. For someone who boasted about empathy, Morality had an awful time seeing where Janus came from.

“Yes, precisely. He’s so stubborn,” Logan agreed enthusiastically. As he continued, he began to gesture wildly, speaking with his hands as much as his words to convey his growing level of frustration. “It’s incredible that you’re able to get through to him so effectively when I have been trying to do the same for years now. I mean, stubborn is a kind word for him at this point and he continues to prove that at every moral junction we come to. No, not even just moral junctions; daily undertakings and productivity suffer constantly because of his unreliability! It’s just,” Logan sputtered a humorless laugh, his hands falling hard against his thighs. “Ridiculous. Utterly ridiculous.”

Janus paused after Logan’s rant came to an end, cocking his head thoughtfully. In the silence Logan caught his breath with a heavy sigh.

“Sorry, I … didn’t mean to blow up on you like that,” Logan apologized, dismissively shaking his head as embarrassment knotted his stomach.

“Oh no, it’s quite alright. Actually I appreciate it,” Janus quickly snuffed out Logan’s self consciousness. The words felt genuine enough and Logan took a deep breath in an attempt to quell the rising self resentment that predictably followed his emotional expression. “I was just contemplating your words, is all,” Janus continued reassuringly, and the sentiment took Logan by surprise. Why had he assumed Janus’ silence meant dismissal of his admission? “I suppose it simply comes down to a matter of communication methods,” Janus glanced to the side in a reflective pause. “You’re a teacher,” He continued after a moment, a gentle smile on his lips as he met Logan’s eyes again. “But Patton doesn’t take very well to being told things.” Logan snorted a knowing and arid laugh, but then thought on how Janus had communicated with Patton in the past.

“You also tell him things,” Logan’s brows furrowed. “He just seems to readily listen to you.”

“Ah, there’s a difference though,” Janus wagged a flimsy finger. “I don’t tell him anything he doesn’t already know at that point in the conversation. Patton’s like … a horse that desperately needs to drink, but refuses to, even when you bring the water to him directly. In such a case, you need to lead the horse to the water. But how do you get him there? Well, in Patton’s case, asking him questions that in turn make him question his own motives tends to work.”

“Ah, the Socratic method,” Logan interrupted as Janus paused.

“Exactly,” He nodded before continuing, “But more importantly, I hear his justifications. I try to see where he’s coming from so I can...clear a path, so to say, from his point A to wherever my point is.” Logan hummed thoughtfully and marveled at the amount of consideration Janus put into his communication with Patton.

It was admirable and Logan found himself agreeing, once again, with the many flattering adjectives Remus has used for his partner in the past. Graceful, patient, and ridiculously smart. His current explanation made a lot of sense, and Logan felt a bit stupid. He chuckled dryly and looked down, adjusting his glasses. Janus cocked his head, expression perplexed with raised brows.

“Did I say something funny?”

“No,” Logan sighed, “The opposite. You made a great point and I was wondering how I had never thought of that myself.” He admitted with an impressive amount of vulnerability. While the compliment felt nice, mostly Janus was now smiling with pride in Logan’s new found understanding and the handful of walls he had dropped in the process.

“Sometimes,” Janus sighed with a smile, approaching Logan as he had earlier; with steps that placed him just a little too close. “You just need some perspective.” He reached up with both hands and flattened Logan’s collar affectionately, the unexpected gesture making him inhale briskly. “I mean, we all do,” Janus continued, resting his fingers gently against Logan’s collar bones. “Not just you, of course.”

“Of course,” Logan repeated in a whisper that was more breath than words. Having Janus this close, he suddenly felt whatever intelligible response he may have had evaporate on his tongue as a heat quickly consumed his neck all the way to his cheeks.

Janus’ smile twitched wider as he lingered, mischievous amusement sparkling in his eyes. Logan was so easy to rile up; even with a foot between them right now, Janus could feel the attraction rolling off him like heat off concrete in the summer. If he continued to stand here, what would Logan do?

“How are you feeling now?” Janus asked after a silent moment. Under his hands, he could feel Logan’s heart rate pick up.

“Fine,” Logan answered automatically, the word cracking indecently. He cleared his throat which marginally brought his senses back. “Fine,” He repeated, shaking his head with a small smile. Janus thought the expression seemed a little forced.

“Good,” Janus nodded shallowly and paused for another beat before turning away, leaving the air around Logan significantly easier to breathe. “Well, if you need anything else,” Janus’ voice trailed off as he twisted the doorknob with one hand and raised another to delicately wave his fingers goodbye.

When his door clicked shut, Logan fell heavily back on his bed again with a groan that ended in a sigh.

Chapter One || Chapter Three

#loceit appreciation week #loceit week #loceitweek2021 #loceit #janus x logan #sanders sides fanfiction

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