#utilizing my followers for a good cause :o

[clanwarrior-tumbly]

oh!! Oh!!! Lamb with a reader who taught him how to use the red crown as a gun!! Reader is flexing their talent like "haha yeah I was shamuras best (and like only) shot >:)" and follower shamura (who is maybe readers s/o??) is just like "I vaguely remember a report coming of you shooting one of the windows of my temple...." but lamb and reader have that vibe thats like older cousin younger cousin that cause chaos at every gathering their both at

"What is this..?"

"My, you've done it! The power of a blunderbuss now belongs to you, dear Lamb."

"The blunder...wha..?" Tilting their head, Lamb stared at the rather odd weapon the Red Crown manifested itself into recently, before looking back at you.

You're a weapons expert from Silk Cradle, becoming an apprentice of Kudaai to better hone you combat capabilities while in service to Bishop Shamura. Although you were good with blades and arrows, the old bird allowed you to indulge into a different type of weaponry:

The blunderbuss. A powerful weapon that shot magic bullets, the damage dependent on how close your target was.

Its potential drew you towards it--like a moth to a flame--and you began studying it, utilizing it in any situation where you had to fight for your life. Even after winding up in Lamb's cult, they allowed you to keep the weapon so long as you didn't raise it against any of their followers.

You wouldn't dare to.

Not after seeing their incredible power gifted by the One Who Waits...who was now the cult's undertaker for the day, tending to the crypts and all the dearly departed who laid within them.

From the moment you heard Lamb had begun to harness their own blunderbuss, they seemed lost on how to use it, so they turned to you for an explanation.

You listened to their recounts of putting several holes through scamper heads, sniping flying beasts right out of the sky, and even making shield-bearing heretics recoil from the sheer force of the bullets.

"It's indeed a highly unconventional weapon," you told them. "Rarely known to anyone in the Old Faith except Shamura, Kudaai, and myself. But as you can tell...it beats the bow of a silly archer any day. They're dead before their arrow even made it out of the quiver."

"That is true," the sheep nodded, looking to their own weapon, the red eye staring back at them. "I notice that it refills on its own...but it took forever. I kept clicking the damn trigger, but nothing." With a small grumble, they glared at you. "I was in a tough spot, and had to use a curse to escape..otherwise I would've been dead--not that it matters..but it was annoying."

"I was going to mention that little tradeoff, Lamb." You chuckled softly. "With the blunderbuss, patience becomes your greatest virtue."

"Well..patience won't help when I'm surrounded by fanatics who are still making martyrs out of the Bishops, and I'm backed into a corner with little fervor, and I can't-"

"What of the Bishops?"

A raspy voice spoke, startling Lamb a little as you both saw a certain purple arachnid now standing over you two. Despite their menacing looks, their eyes were full of curiosity.

"A-Ah, Shamura."

"Shamura." You warmly greeted, patting the spot beside you. "Come sit. Lamb has an inquiry."

Wordlessly, they sat and glanced at the leader, waiting for whatever they had to say.

"Erm..what do you know about this?" They showed them the blunderbuss. "The people of Anchordeep and Silk Cradle supposedly have the most advanced weaponry..yet I haven't seen one person wield anything like this. Were these outlawed or something?"

Without speaking or blinking, Shamura took it into their hands, examining it thoroughly. They seemed rather focused...although it could have been due to the fact the Red Crown had taken form of it, which made Lamb a bit nervous.

Even though the Bishops couldn't do anything with it now, they still got fidgety whenever it left their side for too long...and even more nervous seeing it resting in the hands of another.

"I see...I remember something clearly." Shamura spoke after a long minute of silence.

"You do?"

"The broken window of my temple...was supposedly from one of the magic shells. Who informed me? Not a clue..but I knew the guilty party." All of their eyes suddenly shifted to you, narrowed with suspicion.

You looked around, pretending to play dumb, before you pointed to a random follower. "You mean him?"

"....take me naught for a fool, [y/n]." They hissed. "You were always trigger happy. We have barred use of this from the fighting pit. As an old saying goes, "never bring a blunderbuss to a knife fight".....who said it? I cannot say. But I knew who didn't like that rule."

"You have to admit, though, I was your best sharpshooter." You winked, smiling as they handed the blunderbuss back to you. "The archers were all jealous that I had better aim. I did offer to teach them."

"You were always trigger happy. We have barred use of this from the fighting pit.."

"Yes we have. I'm the one who got it banned in Silk Cradle." Feeling a little awkward, you laughed nervously. "But it's good to see that somebody else is able to learn the art of gunslinging."

"Now that Lamb has obtained knowledge of this tool..." Shamura hummed. "..what are you to do with it?"

Your leader was silent for a few moments, wondering if they should mention shooting freefalling spiders and stopping charger bugs dead in their tracks....when you interjected.

"They still have much to learn about it. So maybe we could borrow some training dummies from Kudaai, and I'll help them improve their marksmanship....if they wish to learn, of course." Nudging their shoulder, Lamb perked up and gazed at you for a few seconds, surprised by your offer.

Then they grinned, a twinkle in their eye as their crown returned to their head, back to normal. "You'd teach me how to master the blunderbuss?"

"Why not? You've mastered every other weapon." Laughing softly, you stood up, before extending your hand to them. "Perhaps we can have Ratau set up old worm corpses for us, and I can show you how to aim for the most vital organs."

"Wouldn't those be the brain and the heart?"

"See? You're already learning well. You'll be a natural in no time, Leader."

Lamb's smile widened as they took your hand, standing up before you two set off for the Lonely Shack.

Meanwhile, Shamura remained on the ground, sighing as they pondered over the mischief you two will bring to that old rat and his friends..

And Leshy had the misfortune of overhearing those last few bits of your conversation, as he unearthed himself from the soil just a few feet away from his sibling, spitting out dirt.

"As if my minions dying wasn't disgraceful enough...Lamb and your silly "sharpshooter" will spend today desecrateing their corpses for practice?!" He shuddered. "They think so...alike."

"Have you not used dissenters for the same purpose, brother?"

"..I used to be chaos, Shamura. That's different."

[random-and-average]

Yandere Miguel O'Hara with Shadow Wizard!S/O

Author's Note: I spent hours pondering how to make this work, but I came up with nothing that would make sense in terms of the movie. Thus, my rationale is that, if the multiverse details every single possibility and change, then magic has to exist in one of them, right? (Please just let me have this :']) Also, this headcanon is most likely the darkest one I've made so far. With great power comes great suffering, it seems.

Content Warning(s): kidnapping, confinement, mentioned drugging, exploitation, stalking, Google translate Spanish, extremely bad writing

At first, Miguel would try to find a way to use your magic to benefit him while determining your specialties and limits

Of course, those a part of the Shadow Wizard Money Gang Secret Society (SWSS) have to be exceptionally good at magic, so you're no exception

(Although, the society exclusively practices conjuration, transmutation, and necromancy magic because I don't see a Shadow Wizard society practicing things like divination or abjuration)

At the very least, if you refuse to use your magic to serve someone who is lesser than you, you'll just have to conjure random items that Spider-People need, such as a screwdriver or stepping stool

At most, if you're willing to be under Miguel's orders, you will be a semi-member of the Spider-Society, so you'll be brought on missions to aid in maintaining the order of the multiverse

On the off chance that Miguel has free time, he'll demand you see him so that he can witness you utilize your magic

Your universe's Spider-Man, if he is a part of Miguel's society, is internally cursing the entirety of the SWSS for causing him trouble outside of his universe

"Do you guys have to cause chaos in every location you're in?" Spider-Mage complained as he followed you around. As your universe's original Spider-Man, he was tasked to monitor you while you get comfortable at headquarters, though the two of you hated the idea of being in the other's presence.

"And do you have to be a wet carpet in every location you're in?" You quipped. "Spirits forbid you cast a minor transmutation spell! You might just upset the very order of magic with that one."

"I fail to see how using a shrinking spell to make Webslinger think his horse went missing is a 'minor transmutation spell,' but please enlighten me."

"I can't enlighten a fool who thinks size reduction is anything more than a minor spell. Inherent ineptitude isn't something that can be fixed immediately."

"Why you..."

»»-———¯\_(ツ)_/¯———-««

The moment he grasps the full scope of your abilities, including your necromancy ones, he'll start taking up more of your time until all of your days are spent with him

Granted, at this point it's not out of love, but so you can bring the family that he lost and was never able to get back no matter how hard he tried back

And he will force you to truly resurrect them, no matter the price

Diamonds? A body? Something holy? Something cursed? Anything you need, he'll provide it for you

You'll be confined to a solitary room until you get the spell right, unable to see anyone but Miguel when he provides you the materials to resurrect them

He can't afford you being distracted when the possibility of getting his family back is within reach

Unfortunately, the main component of true resurrection is that the soul of the person is willing to be brought back to life

Main problem? Only Gabriella is willing to come back, both of his wives meanwhile...

You can't even plead with them to come back, as Miguel doesn't have either wife's corpse

And he refuses to not have both his wife and child

So you're forced to stay in that cramped room and sleep on an uncomfortable mattress for longer, draining your energy repeatedly casting the same spell

With nothing grounding you to the present except for the buzzing of fluorescent lights, you started wondering how long it had been since Miguel quite literally dragged you to this small room in order to fulfill his deranged fantasies.

'Bring back my family,' he demanded from you as if you could just perfectly resurrect people at the press of a button, and even then, with his distasteful personality, you doubted the reunion would be all sunshine and rainbows.

However, you were starting to get desperate.

You didn't care how he was going to insane lengths to bring back his dead wife and daughter. You didn't care that the former individual didn't want to come back. You didn't care that he somehow was able to not only supply but continuously provide the materials you needed to cast the spell.

You just wanted to get out of this prison.

You couldn't stand the buzzing lights; the stiff spring mattress that reeked of body odor due to you not being able to shower; the putrid stench and humiliating sight of the toilet bucket, stripping you of your pride as a Shadow Wizard; the monochrome color scheme of this spirit forsaken cell that was exacerbated by the grey concrete walls all around you; the lack of being able to interact with anyone, save for the madman that brought you here; and the fact that you were only here to be exploited, to be treated like a tool that can be used whenever and however its owner pleases.

The screeching noise of metal against concrete stole your attention and forced you to look at the only person who would enter this miserable room.

"I have the needed materials."

You couldn't help but sneer at Miguel's statement. His straight-forwardness was refreshing at times, but in this situation, it infuriated you. He didn't even politely request that you cast a difficult spell or ensured that you were comfortable to do so. If only he knew that, back in your dimension, people would get on their hands and knees to beg you to cast a simple spell.

"What makes you think that your wife will allow herself to be brought back? She hasn't done it in the past, so what would make her change now? You might as well give up or settle for only Gabriella being resurrected," you reasoned. Hopefully, he still had enough sanity to know that what he wanted was a pipe dream. If he did, it would mean you would be able to be freed sooner.

"She might have finally come around to the idea that it's better to come back to her husband."

Rage almost compelled you to lash out at him. How easy it was for him to talk as if he was minorly inconvenienced by his wife's refusal when you were the one suffering because of it. Though, you reigned your anger in since you wanted to reduce the amount of time you had to spend in this place.

Miguel would eventually understand that achieving his dream was futile, and some vengeful part of you wished to see him break down in despair when he does.

»»-———¯\_(ツ)_/¯———-««

His feelings for you only start to change once he realizes that, regardless of how many times you cast True Resurrection, neither of his wives will be willing to come back

Miguel is obviously devastated by these turn of events

Suddenly, he is much more aware of how lonely he was this entire time, and it's too much for him to bear alone

So he finds comfort in someone that has no choice but to provide him solace, you

Slowly, with each visit (or counselling sessions, basically), he grows fond of you

You are the only one who stood next to him when he was at his lowest (even if it was unwillingly)

In gratitude, you are let out of your room, but you're limited to the entirety of headquarters, nothing outside of it

He can't let you leave after you saw him when he was the most vulnerable he'd ever been since the loss of his second family; you were special

Eventually, the longer you stay by his side, his fondness for you grows into something else as he takes note of your interests, quirks, and minute features

"Miguel? Miguelllllllll. Are you even listening to me?"

Lyla appeared in front of the footage of you laughing with the other Spider-People as you demonstrated that you, too, were capable of shooting webs like them, forcing Miguel's attention to focus on her rather than you.

"Por el amos de Dios (for fuck's sake), what do you want, Lyla? I'm busy."

The woman gave him a stare that indicated that she didn't believe him. "Yeahhh, busy doing what exactly? Busy being a creep?"

"I'm busy monitoring the anomaly to ensure they don't interfere with the multiverse."

She scoffed, "You and I both know that they have no intention of doing so. If they did, they would've done it already, seeing as they have plenty of magic at their disposal. Obviously, you're stalking them out of your own self-interests."

Miguel glared at the hologram as he turned off the footage with a frustrated huff.

"I don't care what you think about me, but any word about this to anyone else, especially them, and I will erase you. Understand?"

All of Lyla's sass vanished faced with the man's glowing red stare that pierced through her being. Although she wished he was just bluffing, his tone clearly showed otherwise.

"...I understand." And with that, she disappeared.

»»-———¯\_(ツ)_/¯———-««

You'll know when Miguel is completely besotted with you

He will start taking up more of your time, just like he did when he understood your necromancy magic

This time, however, it's not to resurrect his dead family; it's to just spend time with him

It starts out as being forced to have breakfast, lunch, and dinner with him

Then it turns into full-fledged "dates" where he allows you to explore various dimensions under his supervision

Finally, you are forced to choose to have a microchip implanted in your body so that Miguel knows where you are 24/7; be magically bound to Miguel through a sacred ritual, courtesy of an intimidated Spider-Mage following orders; or stay by Miguel 24/7

Of course, the man does feel guilty for keeping you in the equivalent of solitary confinement

As a result, he is willing to bend the knee to you at times, giving into your demands as long as they aren't too "unreasonable"

He will spend the rest of his life atoning for what he did to you

Dedicates a space for you in his home where you can cast and experiment with as many spells as you desire

(It has cameras hidden in every nook and cranny in case you start dabbling in magic that'll take you away from him)

Absolutely melts inside when you start becoming less hostile/defensive towards him

(However, if your hostility doesn't stop, he'll simply remedy the issue by sneaking a love potion—once again, courtesy of Spider-Mage—into your drink)

Without fail, he takes a week-long break on your "honeymoon" every year, which usually involves visiting your home dimension

Speaking of your home dimension, the Shadow Wizard Secret Society (SWSS) initially doesn't take too kindly to one of their own being romantically involved with a magic-less person

But as the saying goes: if there's a will, there's a way

After a few choice threats and an offer to provide them with any needed materials, they're perfectly fine with Miguel

Though your colleagues pity you for being bound to such a lowly lifeform

Miguel loves seeing you cast magic and will even set aside some time for you to show him your power if you desire it

Secretly looks forward to watching you teach your future children magic

Gave you access to his desk, so you can also watch the Spider-People

Even allows you to be there while he discusses plans, mainly because Lyla likes having you there

(She sometimes begs you to demonstrate your magical prowess by having you animate objects into recreating the plan)

Will keep you in the dark about plans concerning individuals that could negatively influence you, specifically Miles and Hobie

Jealous of any creature you summon/conjure, even if it's to do a task; though, his jealousy intensifies if it's a humanoid

Goes through the effort of learning wizard customs (courtesy of Spider-Mage, like always)

All things considered, it was a normal day for you. You just spent hours watching movies that Miguel bought for you in his massive luxury apartment, and there weren't alarms about a rogue anomaly. The entire day so far was peaceful and uneventful, really.

And that made the alarms in your head go off.

Your thoughts were interrupted when your homunculus dropped right beside you on the couch with an excited chirp. With a smile, you pet your servant.

"So, is Miguel hiding something from me again?"

It tapped the cushion twice. Yes.

"I knew it," you sighed. "I wonder if it has something to do with Hobie again."

You got up from the sofa with a groan as you stretch, and your homunculus jumped down to join you. However, you picked it up and placed it back where it was.

"You'll have to stay here for now, Empanada. Wouldn't want the mean spider to know who gave away his plans."

The homunculus, Empanada (You honestly thought that it deserved a better name, but Jess jokingly suggested that Miguel would like it more if you named after something he liked), whined, but it ultimately laid down on a pillow, indicating that it wouldn't follow you.

With your homunculus out of the way, you closed your eyes and pictured the meeting area that you were familiar with as well as the empty chair that was reserved for you.

"Teleport."

Rather than feeling the soft cushions of your chair, you felt the sensation of falling from the sky, and when you opened your eyes, that was indeed the case since you teleported a good amount of feet above the ground. "Are you kidding me right now?"

Expectedly, the people in the room didn't anticipate your arrival.

"I didn't know that they could teleport!"

"Gwen, you didn't tell me that there was a Spider-Person that could come out of thin air!"

"Oh ho, that person is the last person Miguel would want to be here."

"Querido/Querida!"

Before you could cast another spell, you find yourself in Miguel's arms while he chided you.

"What are you doing here? You should be back at home!"

"Don't think I'm stupid, Mig. I know something's up when there's nothing going on."

"That doesn't mean you should cast such a dangerous spell!"

"Any wizard worth their salt knows how to cast a teleportation spell. Besides, it's only 'dangerous' if you're not skilled enough."

"...Mi vida, we're having a talk after this."

Miguel set you gently onto the ground, and you steadied yourself before you saw that there was a seemingly new addition to the Spider-Society, a Spider-Man who looked to be bleeding out of his armpits.

"You didn't tell me that you recruited a new Spider-Man, Miguel."

"That's because I didn't. I had Jess bring him here because he disrupted a canon event in Earth-50101."

"Lemme guess, someone was supposed to die, and he saved them, right?"

"It would be for the sake of the multiverse-"

"So you say. Anyways," you turn to the new Spider-Man, "what's your name?"

"Miles. Miles Morales."

There was something about him that made him stand out from the millions of people you've seen across your life so far. Even though you've never touched divination magic, you could tell that Miles was destined for great things.

And you wanted to be there to experience those things.

"Something tells me that you and I are going to get along real well, Miles."

[twistedwonderlandshenanigans]

December Drabbles

Prompt 24: Gift Character(s): Jamil + Najma (you guys are all lucky I promised my s/o I would make this fluffy and good in Jamil's favour) ------------------------------------------------------- "Go on, open it." Jamil gave Najma a withering look as he looked over the haphazardly wrapped .....thing in his hands. "I should wait one more ni-" "Oh come on, don't be stuck up about it just open it! I want you to have it for tomorrow morning." Najma rocked a bit back and forth in excitement on her brothers bed, watching his reactions a little too closely for his liking. He sighed and pinched the bridge of his nose. "We aren't kids anymore Najma, I can be patient to open a gift. I can just open this first thing tomorrow, pro-" "I will put a cockroach in your bed while you sleep, open the damn gift Jamil it's not going to kill you." It was her turn to give Jamil an unamused look as she shook her head a bit. "Besides, until we're both eighteen, I'm not giving up the tradition of opening one gift the night before. So kiddo open the present." Jamil gave her another warning glance at the unprecedented nickname, before caving and starting to open the gift she got him. Not a moment later was he stifling a scream as she hunched over in silent laughter at the rubber millipede she had placed on top of his actual gift. Both of them knew better than to make much noise though - neither wanted to wake their parents. Jamil looked rather mad at her, but sighed and let it go, trying not to give her the reaction she wanted beyond his initial one. She was still wiping tears from her eyes as he unfolded a beautiful piece of linen, her laughter slowly coming to a stop as she looked down a little bit. The scarf was made with high quality materials, both by the feel and look of it. It was in his favourite colour, but there were many tiny details hidden in the stitching that he could just barely make out, but all of them focused on him, or his family. "I kinda ran out of extra money so I figured making something might be ok. I wanted to get you dance shoes but...I figured since in a year or so you'll be interning somewhere probably far away from here....and who knows you might go completely off grid but...you're a practical person. A scarf fits easily in a suitcase, backpack, pocket. You can utilize in different ways, I know you can I've seen you do it. Or...you can use it for decoration...if you wanted to." Not hearing a response from her brother, she groaned a bit and threw her head back. "Ok ok I know it was cheesy, if you're gonna tease me just say somet-" The last thing she had expected was for Jamil to hug her. It took her a moment, but she hugged him back, patting his back awkwardly. "You ok?....you're kinda weirding me out Jamil, if you don't like it I'll just keep it." Jamil gave her a small squeeze and shook his head as he pulled away. "Sorry, that wasn't the message I meant to convey. Your gift is fine...but Najma..." He took a seat next to her, grabbing her hand gently.

"You don't need to worry about being able to contact me. You're the one person in this and any other world I would regret cutting ties with. I'll keep this with me wherever I go. It means more to me than any material item I've gotten before. I promise you though, I won't go anywhere you can't follow...when it's your time to." She finally managed a smile again, a little more reassured as her brother conquered the nagging worries in the back of her mind so easily. "We both wanna get outta here huh?" He chuckled softly, and a little sadly as he wrapped one arm around her and gave her a squeeze again. "Yeah. Once I've got a solid start, then you can move in any time. You just have to pull your weight, got it?" She leaned on his shoulder and nodded. "Got it." "Good." He shoved her out of his bed, causing her to squawk and immediately cover her mouth, giggling a little bit at the sound she made as they waited for a beat for any sound their parents had woken up. After they were in the clear, Jamil spoke again, smiling more. "Now go get to bed kiddo tomorrow's going to be a lot more fun." She stuck her tongue out at him before scurrying out of his room, looking forward to tomorrow, and the future. One less thing to worry about. As Jamil sat in bed, he looked over the scarf one more time, smiling warmly as he hung it over his bed for now. Yeah, there was no way that was going to be used for anything but a loving memory.

[purplekoop]

Fitting the season, I'm hoping to work on updating more of the old Darkworld Showdown characters in dire need of updates, so kicking off the month with the "unique" witch, Molly!

The latest in the long Tovelstein bloodline of witches, Molly was very loose in following her grandma's teachings... or any teachings, really. Now she follows her own potion-making pursuits while also helping run the family business, even if the only thing they trust her to do right is cleaning duty. She tends to be a bit aloof and short-sighted, but she has an inexplicable knack for being able to figure things out even in a dire moment.

Molly brings her on-the-fly potion making talents into battle as her playstyle-defining neutral special, Potion Brew, where she brews a potion with an unpredictable effect thanks to her haphazard methods. The only way she can influence her potion is to determine whether the effect is good or bad, though the difference is imperceptible visually. Potions do have colors that indicate which of two effects they might have, in pairs of good or bad counterparts sharing a color, but there's no way to influence the color. A red potion could grow or shrink, a blue potion could be a speed boost or a slowdown, a green potion could be a gradual heal or a poison, and so on. Potions can be thrown as items, but using certain explosive magical attacks will infuse the effect of the potion into the explosion. Molly can also apply a potion to herself by drinking it with one of her taunts. She also has a few unique concoctions always on standby as her up and down specials. Her up special is the Bottled Charge, a bottle of volatile fluid that Molly shakes up before leaving it ready at her hip. Holding the special button builds the charge, but lets Molly keep using any other actions. Releasing the charge causes the bottle to burst, creating an explosion that sends Molly harmlessly rocketing upwards, but violently launches enemies. Releasing the burst can even interrupt Molly's other moves. However, Molly taking any amount of hitstun while charging will cause the bottle to harmlessly fly off. Her down special meanwhile is the Flask o' Flame, a relatively simple projectile that has Molly toss an orange potion that bursts into a small pillar of flame on contact with an enemy, or bursts into three subsequent pillars along the ground. Unlike her other specials, this one is entirely independent of your currently held potion, making it a readily accessible means of claiming some space or starting some combos. In addition to these varied potions, Molly also uses her magical mop as a weapon, either by swinging it wildly like a floppy spear, or creating bursts of built up magic from years of cleaning spilled up potions. These bursts can be used as lethal disjointed attacks, or as a propellent to send Molly flying atop it for her side special, Mop Rocket.

Without her bag of tricks, Molly is a fairly underwhelming fighter. Her attacks and movement are on the slower side (drinking so much on the job has consequences), and her survivability is average. She has some decent range with some moves, but they lack raw power or make reliable combos on their own. In order to gain an edge, she has to play smart with her potions and other tools to pressure the opponent. Her most powerful resources require time to build up or maintain, so finding these opportunities and then utilizing them is vital to doing well with her.

But that's Molly! She's a character I've had around for over 4 years now, jesus christ, but her old design was dreadful and in drastic need of an update, especially for a moveset and personality I like so much. I also took this as my first chance to try and add some more unique and varied body types to the humanoid side of the roster, and I'm very happy with the result here. I'll uh. Save the comparison to her old design for private sharing, not something I wanna have on big open website.

[hamsamwich23]

Well hello there!

Howdy! My name is Sam and/or Mort.

I'm a 20 year old queer-asexual demiboy who uses he/they/it/xe pronouns. I am polyamorous and have one partner whom I love dearly💛

My main hobbies right now are creative writing and photography, but I also enjoy video games, roleplaying, cooking/baking, and reading in my spare time.

My bigger interests right now are Hello Puppets, 1nv&d³r Z¹m, Doki Doki Literature Club, Undertale/Deltarune, Cats Are Liquid, Pressure (Roblox), Regretavator (Roblox) and Cult Of The Lamb.

Video game interests (or games I Enjoy): Milk Inside/Outside A Bag Of Milk, Sucker for love! Games series, smile for me, Amanda The Adventurer, Undertale Yellow, Happy game, Night In The Woods, Limbo, Inside, *Omori*, The Dog Island, Minecraft, Needy Streamer Overload, *Bendy and the ink machine*, Yo-Kai Watch (1st and 2nd games), Hollow Knight, Okami, Backrooms games, Sonic Frontiers, I'm On Observation Duty, Among Us.

Show/series interests: Don't Hug Me I'm Scared, Adventure Time, Full Metal Alchemist Brotherhood (just started), Tuca and Bertie, Nexo Knights, Ninjago, The Mandela Catalogue, Angel Hare

Music interests: GHOST/GHOST and pals, Lily Vane, RIProducer, Jack Stauber, Vocaloid, Peculiar audios, Penelope Scott

Misc interests/just stuff I like: Welcome Home project, Liminal Space, Moths, Space, The Backrooms lore, SCP Foundation lore, stickers, plushies,

*- I do not support the creator(s) behind these. And if anyone behind above listed interests has done something that I am unaware of then feel free to inform me.

I dabble in Self-shipping sometimes...I'm perfectly fine with sharing f/o's just don't be. Like. Weird or nasty about it? Like be chill be respectful and we're all good

My DMS are always open to mutuals who want to talk, or anyone who's interested in my AUS or wants to talk about mutual interests, however please note that I have physical and mental health issues as well as work a full time job and am not always active or able to respond. I just appreciate any patience when it comes to talking to me.

My Two current main AUS at this moment are:

Unreality Au: A multi-fandom AU inspired by weirdcore and horror themes where the world has been overtaken by a unknown curse caused by dark magic. OCs and Characters from Hello Puppets, Doki Doki Literature Club, Undertale (somewhat), Fetch from mf Fazbear frights, MAYBE pressure (as a little treat) maybe Regretavator dashed in and Hatsune Miku. This story so far is planned to be told through one shots and short fanfiction. Not every fandom listed here is part of official lore but is implied to exist in the same universe for my own little fun

If interested, you can follow my blog: @unreality-au-content-hoard

Dimension 2020 AU: Revamped I/Z au featuring my Z¹msona/OC Twenty rewritten (as when I was younger the au was poorly written/executed). The new summary of this story is as follows:

"After being lost and found as a mere smeet, Twenty is finally able to move past the incident from years ago and live a normal life among other young irkens within the academy. Everything is going very well...until one day..... everything begins to go wrong."

While I will post links to the official fanfiction when it is started as well as updates on Instagram, I will not be posting anything about it on Tumblr for my own comfort.

Aside from these projects, Writing commissions and trades are CLOSED for an indefinite amount of time, as I am too busy to fulfill any more work. However, requests for Unreality one shots or suggestions are usually open.

DNI

While I am fully aware that people will most likely ignore my DNI boundaries, I am still going to put them out here that I will just block you if I see anyone in my DNI interacting with me. I may even end up blocking people out of paranoia or due to compulsions. I very much utilize the block button.

You will be blocked if you are- bigoted in any way/shape/form, pr0sh¹p/c∅msh¹p/similar, ship discourse focused blog, LGBTQ+ discourse focused blog, Rad-exclusive, a pro-harassment antishipper, people against self-shipping and/or OC x Canon, support use of AI art and AI content, support creators like Viziepop and JKrowling (or anyone I'm uncomfortable with), people who believe "black washing" is a thing and/or defend whitewashing, L∅l¹/sh∅t& con supporters/enjoyers, people who call themselves "M.A.Ps" (pedos. You're pedophiles), and anything similar to what is mentioned above

Though technically, even if you are none of the above, I still end up blocking people out of paranoia or if they give me bad vibes. I understand that it is irrational, however it is for my comfort and mental health.

Kink/NSFW blogs are okay to interact, but if you're pr/ship or make fetish art of minors/siblings/ect then uhhhh get lost

Please do NOT talk to me about Ship Discourse or LGBTQ+ Discourse I literally just want to chill here

Tags

Tags I would recommend blocking if they make you uncomfortable are:

woah sam that's REALLY gay - suggestive tag for future just in case(?) I doubt it'll ever be used but it doesn't hurt to have a warning

morts sad time - vent tag

If you're interested in my works or talking outside my Tumblr, my socials are below!

Discord: hamsamwich23

Instagram: hamsamwich23

Wattpad: hamsamwich23

SquidgeWorld: hamsamwich23

And most importantly...

This blog stands with the people of Palestine, Congo, Sudan, and the many other countries that are suffering and struggling right now. Below me is a post linking to resources to help these countries and more.

This master document was originally created by Seaweedlagoon on Twitter/"X" and reposted on Tumblr by user eggyolkperona3000

Thank you for reading!!

[subliminalbo]

10 Years of Subliminalbo

Candice Swanepoel: Mindless Supermodel on Tour Annotated [ 1 ]

Originally published November 26th, 2013

Hundreds of young women were gathering at a Victoria's Secret in Pasadena [ 2 ] where Candice Swanepoel was promoting a new lingerie line, Obedience by Victoria [ 3 ]. Many only showed up to get an autograph and a picture with the supermodel, but a select few were chosen to join Candice in a private meeting after the event [ 4 ].

Once the fifteen chosen girls followed Candice into the room, each one received their very own Obedience bra which Candice ordered them to put on [ 5 ]. When all of the girls had returned from the fitting rooms, they found that Candice had stripped down into her underwear and was waiting to greet them in her own pair of Obedience by Victoria lingerie. Then she began her demonstration. The girls listened intently to Candice's every word as she went over the usual stuff: how the bra gave enough lift to create the illusion of larger breasts, but didn't sacrifice the comfort that every bra needs [ 6 ]. How all the designs, for example her's with black and white polka-dots [ 7 ], were cute and flirty but sexy and mature all at once. And how the bra kept a woman mindless, blank, submissive [ 8 ].

"Each bra comes with its own unique identification card [ 9 ]," Candice spoke promptly, professionally, as if she were reading from a script [ 10 ]. "And the holder of that id card controls the wearer of the bra. As long as I'm wearing Obedience by Victoria, I have no control of my own. However, since I have your cards, I do have control over all of you. Does that make sense? [ 11 ]"

"Yes, Mistress Candice," the girls replied [ 12 ].

"Good," Candice smiled as she looked upon an audience of blank faces. "The bra was assembled in America with materials produced in Pakistan [ 13 ]. Utilizing research that is only legal in Yugoslavia [ 14 ], Victoria's Secret has created a bra that is truly a first of its kind, and a look into the future of the industry. Please refrain from wearing Obedience by Victoria for more than four hours; prolonged use may cause memory loss, catatonia, loss of motor control, and irregular increase in sex drive. If you experience any of these symptoms, remove the bra immediately and consult a physician for you could be experiencing early signs of mind control poisoning. Ask your doctor before use [ 15 ].

"Now, my girls, [ 16 ]" Candice took a breath.

"Yes, Mistress Candice?"

"You're all going to go home, and you're going to find another girl. It could be your sister, your friend, your mother, your cousin, it doesn't matter. You're going to find another girl and you're going to make sure she gets a bra just like yours [ 17 ]."

"Yes, Mistress Candice. We will obey."

"Good. We want every woman in America to experience Obedience by Victoria with us."

"Yes, Mistress Candice. They will submit."

Mindless, the women left the mall and headed home, all thinking about their mission [ 18 ].

Candice boarded the fastest plane out of LA, en route to Milwaukee [ 19 ] where the next Victoria's Secret on the tour was located. On the plane she received a call. "Yes," she spoke quietly into the receiver. "I fitted them all with the bras...Yes, the effect was instantaneous...Of course I'm still wearing mine...Yes, I do nothing but think of you when I'm wearing it...Yes, I will do anything...Yes...Anything for you, Master. [ 20 ]"

[ 1 ]. Mindless Supermodel Model on Tour created a lot of problems for me. It was originally meant to be a series of shorts where we see Candice in different little mind control vignettes, but the idea of a mind controlling lingerie brand was too broad to just bury in a random one shot, so I kept writing about it. I pretty quickly moved to writing fictional characters after this short, but Obedience by Victoria remained an important bit of lore for several years until I just said fuck it and swapped out Victoria's Secret for Fleur-de-lis, creating ersatz versions of the Victoria's Secret models that I'd previously written about. You can read a much, much better version of this story here as Obedience By Fleur #1.

[ 2 ]. Before Romero, I liked to set these stories in completely random cities that I've never been to.

[ 3 ]. Fun with brand name parodies. I thought Obedience By Victoria was so clever for some reason.

[ 4 ]. In my "just writing a quick caption to establish context for the manip" era, these stories start so abruptly. It feels really weird to just jump into something without any groundwork.

[ 5 ]. They aren't even mind controlled yet lmao

[ 6 ]. Incredibly painful to read a 19 year old kid write about women's underwear like he knows what he's talking about.

[ 7 ]. I used to go out of my way to place the story in the manip somehow, but this proved incredibly limiting. At some point I stopped letting the manips tell the stories and today I rarely reference imagery from the manips.

[ 8 ]. This is supposed to be a "murder, arson, jaywalking" joke, but the bit doesn't land because I spread it out over three long sentences instead of one list.

[ 9 ]. Huh

[ 10 ]. Because she's under mind control, you see. Totally unreasonable to suspect that a person pitching a new product for their company would be reading from a script.

[ 11 ]. Weirdly insecure for a mindless drone.

[ 12 ]. Nitpicking myself here but I don't think "replied" is the word choice I would use for fifteen mind controlled girls speaking in unison today.

[ 13 ]. I wonder if this was researched or if I just picked completely random countries. I'm guessing the latter.

[ 14 ]. Oof, most of the jokes in my early stuff just don't land. I've always been better at the melodrama.

[ 15 ]. Pretty good bit.

[ 16 ]. I would also probably not have her say "my girls" if I were writing this today. Just reads weird to me.

[ 17 ]. Not the first instance of serial recruitment in my writing at this point (the sequel to that Fleur-de-lis chapter that I posted the other night has it), but the first that I like.

[ 18 ]. Are they mindless or are they thinking? Just a weird transition paragraph that exists to remind the reader one more time that there's mind control in this story.

[ 19 ]. What even is this tour? Surely there are Victoria's Secrets between Pasadena and Milwaukee lmao

[ 20 ]. This is a Metal Gear Solid reference and it's fucking stupid

[scolbert22]

Incident Report

Written based on a photo submission by  @TJtheGuard on Twitter.

Home Owner’s Association Incident Case #58887269342

Reported by HOA Agent Edward Bland (Badge #H438)

At 6:38pm Eastern Standard Time, I was making my rounds when I knocked on the door of a 5875 Poplar Drive. The home was emitting noise levels that were well above the limit outlined by the Home Owner’s Association, specifically Paragraph II, Subheading 4 (Unpermitted Recreational Noise After 2:00 PM).  Homeowners Ralph and Garrett O’Malley.

 (The following is a transcript of the exchange that led to the Incident herein reported.)

GO: Hey, Kev-! Oh sorry, you’re not Kevin!

Agent Bland: Good Evening, Mr. O’Malley. I’m Agent Bland of the Home Owner’s Association. 

GO: Oh, Hi there. Let me get my dad, he owns the place

(After 48 seconds, GO Returns with RO)

RO: Hi there, what’s this about? We paid our dues by mail this month, was there an issue?

Agent Bland: No sir, I’m here about the noise level on your premises. It’s above the maximum noise levels permitted after 2 PM by the HOA Guidelines.

RO: Oh, I’m sorry, we weren’t meaning to bother anyone. Has someone complained?

Agent Bland: No one has complained as of yet, but-

RO: Well, Agent Bland, would you be willing to let it slide just this once? I mean its the super bowl, my son is off from college. We won’t bother anyone, I promise!

Agent Bland:  I understand Mr. O’ Malley, but as I’m sure you are aware you signed a contract promising not to disrupt the peace of this neighborhood, and you are currently in violation of that contract.

GO: Dude, can’t you lighten up a little? It’s not like We’re playing metal music or something, it’s just a football game.

Agent Bland: I’m sorry Sir, but there are no exceptions permitted in the HOA Guidelines.

GO: Who cares? That’s the dumbest [EXPLETIVE] I’ve ever heard in my life!

Agent Bland: Please calm down Sir, or I’ll be given no choice but to-

RO: Are you [EXPLETIVE] threatening my son? Get the [EXPLETIVE] off my property, we aren’t hurting anyone.

Agent Bland: Sir, is this verbal confirmation that you do not intend to correct your violation of HOA Guidlines?

RO: This is my  [EXPLETIVE] verbal confirmation that I’ll be as loud as I [EXPLETIVE] please on my own  [EXPLETIVE] property!

(At this point it became clear that the homeowners were hostile, so I utilized the HKM Mark 7 Personality Neutralizer at Subject RO. After a preliminary scan of the subject, the HKM Mark 7 Personality Neutralizer  elected to neutralize subject’s aggression, intelligence, and free will. The subject’s athleticism was also neutralized, causing significant weight gain and wardrobe alteration.  HKM Mark 7 Personality Neutralizer inadvertently fired twice, doubling the effect. Subject GO reacted extremely.)

GO: Dad! What happened to you?!

RO: [UNINTELLIGIBLE]

GO: What did you do to my dad? He’s drooling! Change him back! I’ll [EXPLETIVE] kill you!

(I was forced to once again discharge the HKM Mark 7 Personality Neutralizer, this time at subject GO. Subject experienced a similar effect to RO, including altered wardrobe and weight, but appeared to have a better grip on his mental faculties post blast. The HKM Mark 7 Personality Neutralizer fired only once )

GO: What the fudge did you do to us? fudge. Why do I keep saying fudge instead of fudge?

RO:  fudge

Agent Bland: Agents of the HOA are licensed to neutralize hostile personalities in the event of a confrontation.

GO: Please fix my father mister, I would be very grateful

Agent Bland: It’s regrettable what happened to your father young man, but unfortunately in order to have a personality neutralization reversed, you must file a request with the Home Owner’s Association Office between the hours of 9:00 AM and 4:00 PM, Monday through Thursday.

GO: (SILENT FOR SEVERAL SECONDS) What do we do now?

Agent Bland: Why don’t the two of you turn off the TV and work on a jigsaw puzzle? It’s a good way, HOA approved way to pass the time, and you’ll be in bed by 8:30.

GO: Okay Sir, you have a nice day. Come on Father, let’s do as the Agent says.

RO: Puzzle 

(End of Transcript.)

I am recommending no further disciplinary action at this time, but continued monitoring of 5875 Poplar Drive until such time as the HOA has determined Subjects have permanently ceased disruptive activity.

[theplumbnerd]

5 Essential Steps to Fix a Leaking Faucet in Your Kitchen

Introduction

Dealing with a leaking faucet in your kitchen can be a nuisance. Not only does it waste water and increase your utility bills, but it can also lead to other plumbing issues if left unaddressed. However, fixing a leaking faucet doesn't have to be a daunting task. With the right guidance and tools, you can easily tackle this common household problem. In this article, we'll provide you with a step-by-step guide on how to fix a leaking faucet in your kitchen, covering everything from identifying the type of faucet to troubleshooting common issues and making necessary repairs.

Understanding the Anatomy of Your Faucet

A leaking faucet can be caused by various factors, including worn-out washers, O-rings, or seals, as well as mineral deposits and corrosion. Before diving into the repair process, it's essential to understand the different parts of your faucet. Identifying the Type of Faucet Different types of faucets require different repair techniques. Common types include compression faucets, cartridge faucets, ball faucets, and ceramic disc faucets. Gathering the Necessary Tools and Materials To fix a leaking faucet, you'll need a few basic tools and materials, including an adjustable wrench, screwdrivers, replacement parts (such as washers, O-rings, or cartridges), plumber's tape, and a flashlight.

Diagnosing the Issue

Once you've familiarized yourself with the anatomy of your faucet and gathered the necessary tools, the next step is to diagnose the source of the leak. Examining the Faucet for Visible Signs of Damage Inspect the faucet closely for any visible signs of damage, such as corroded or worn-out components, loose fittings, or mineral deposits. Turning Off the Water Supply Before proceeding with any repairs, it's crucial to shut off the water supply to the faucet. Locate the shut-off valves under the sink or near the water meter and turn them clockwise to close.

Repairing the Faucet

Now that you've identified the issue and turned off the water supply, it's time to proceed with the repairs. Replacing Worn-Out Washers or O-Rings If the leak is coming from the handle of a compression faucet, it's likely due to a worn-out washer or O-ring. Use a screwdriver to remove the handle, then replace the faulty washer or O-ring with a new one of the same size and shape. Installing a New Cartridge or Valve Stem For cartridge, ball, or ceramic disc faucets, you may need to replace the entire cartridge or valve stem. Follow the manufacturer's instructions for your specific faucet model.

Testing and Reassembling the Faucet

Once you've completed the repairs, it's essential to test the faucet to ensure that the leak has been resolved. Reassembling the Faucet Components Carefully reassemble the faucet components in the reverse order of how you disassembled them, ensuring that everything fits snugly and securely. Turning On the Water Supply and Checking for Leaks Turn the water supply back on and slowly open the faucet to check for any leaks. If everything looks good, congratulations – you've successfully fixed your leaking faucet!

How Can I Fix a Leaking Faucet in My Kitchen?

Fixing a leaking faucet in your kitchen is a manageable task that doesn't require advanced plumbing skills. By following the steps outlined in this article and being patient and meticulous in your approach, you can resolve the issue and prevent further water waste and damage to your kitchen.

FAQs

- How do I know if my faucet needs repair? If you notice a persistent drip or leak, visible signs of damage, or reduced water pressure, it's likely time to repair your faucet. - Can I fix a leaking faucet myself, or should I hire a professional plumber? Many faucet repairs can be done DIY-style with the right tools and knowledge. However, if you're unsure or uncomfortable with the process, it's always best to consult a professional plumber. - What should I do if I encounter difficulties during the repair process? If you run into any challenges or complications while fixing your faucet, don't hesitate to reach out to a plumber or seek guidance from online tutorials and forums. - How long does it take to fix a leaking faucet? The time it takes to fix a leaking faucet depends on various factors, including the type of faucet, the extent of the damage, and your level of experience. In general, simple repairs can be completed in under an hour. - Are there any preventive measures I can take to avoid faucet leaks in the future? Regular maintenance, such as cleaning aerators, checking for leaks, and addressing minor issues promptly, can help prevent faucet leaks and prolong the lifespan of your fixtures. - What are the potential consequences of ignoring a leaking faucet? Ignoring a leaking faucet can lead to water waste, increased utility bills, mold and mildew growth, water damage to your kitchen cabinetry and countertops, and even structural damage to your home.

Conclusion

Fixing a leaking faucet in your kitchen is a straightforward task that can save you money, conserve water, and prevent further damage to your home. By following the steps outlined in this article and being proactive about maintenance and repairs, you can keep your kitchen fixtures in optimal condition for years to come. Learn More From Plumbnerd Read the full article

[inner-wellness]

Bioresonance Mora Therapy Naturopathic Drugs Acupuncture Major Care Ache Administration

Bioresonance is know-how that measures these frequencies to determine any disturbances which might be attributable to toxins, viruses, allergens, electro-magnetic pollution and other factors. Our bioresonance expertise performs evaluation bioresonance therapy benefits in addition to harmonisation. Bioenergetic testing can help to determine resonating stress in relation to imbalances in organs and vitamin, food sensitivities, emotions, toxins, hormone imbalances, and more.

In case of any opposed results that do occur, they tend to be mild and short-lived. Semantic Scholar is a free, AI-powered analysis device for scientific literature, primarily based at the Allen Institute for AI. Low-frequency electromagnetic stimulation might result in regression of Morris hepatoma in buffalo rats. Dismiss this notificationPatientsLikeMe wish to remind you that your browser is old-fashioned and heaps of features of the web site may not perform as expected.Please replace your browserfor extra safety and a greater expertise. Health Nag is right here to coach, encourage and remind you that true well being is achievable, without continual suffering and hundreds of pills ‘unhappily eternally after’. An wonderful program with so many insights and aside of this I love the pure recommendations that came after based on my particular person outcomes.

It isn't supposed as an different to the diagnosis, therapy, and advice of your doctor. All examples of what has been achieved by others should not be taken as typical or in any way a assure or projection of what any particular bioresonance therapy toronto person client can anticipate from the remedy. Following his dying, the current management developed a sequence of computer-based gadgets that went past his unique technology.

A pseudoscientific form of electromagnetic therapy based mostly on the largely discredited “school” of radionics launched within the US within the Nineteen Twenties, for which there was no scientific basis then, neither is there now. If you’re on the lookout for an effective bioresonance testing and secure method to heal, BioResonance therapy may be simply what you need. This therapy uses radio or sound waves to stimulate the body’s natural healing talents and has been utilized by folks worldwide for centuries.

Cells which might be in good well being emit harmonious indicators that freely resonate with one another. Toxins or microbes that infect a cell add their own frequencies and distort the cell's pure signal. This investigation of electromagnetic energy produced by residing cells began with Russian engineer Georges Lakhovsky, who published bioresonance therapy The Secret of Life in 1925. Other researchers, including Harold Saxton Burr, Robert O. Becker, and Fritze A. Popp, have made comparable observations. Bio-Resonance technology is a secure, non-invasive, type of evaluation for energetic alignments within the human physique.

Therapy utilizing a bioresonance process ensures the discharge of harmful substances and interference. Once corrected, your physique reverts to its optimal state of self-rejuvenation. B.A.H. draws on 20 years of research, 10 years of trials, and the previous a hundred years of award-winning scientific discoveries in such fields as quantum mechanics. Bioresonance Analysis of Health (B.A.H.) is a sophisticated medical system that assists in figuring out root causes of disease. Bioresonance technology allows you to efficiently struggle a disease without using medicine.

Furthermore, Bioresonance Therapists consider that machines can pinpoint the distribution of cells. It relies on the theory that damaged or unhealthy cells produce completely different frequency patterns than wholesome cells, making them identifiable. [Placebo-controlled research of the results of a standardized MORA bioresonance therapy on useful gastrointestinal complaints]. There isn't any scientific evidence to support the usage of bioresonance therapy to diagnose or treat asthma.

[pirate-patton]

While it’s still early in the month, just thought I’d share something with you guys:

The Teal Pumpkin Project

If you give out candy on Halloween, or your parents do, it would be terrific if you could participate in this! The purpose of the Teal Pumpkin Project is to give kids with food allergies options for Trick-or-Treat! Simply by having things like slinkies and bubbles on hand lets these kids that usually miss out on the fun participate!

If you can do this, then you can add your address to the map in the link so that parents can easily find you! You can also get a pumpkin, either real or plastic, and paint it teal to put in front of your house. There are also downloads for signs you can hang instead if you are going to be giving out both candy and non-food items! (also in the downloads are things like activity sheets and coloring pages for kids to have, as well as sticker sheet templates!)

You can also support the Teal Pumpkin Project and FARE as a whole by donating to them or purchasing Teal Pumpkin products!

Seriously, as someone who grew up with sensitivities to a lot of foods, I grew up either giving most of my bag away to my dad or just throwing it away. The few houses that I went to that gave away toys or bubbles or other goodie bags were always my favorite because I knew they’d have something I could enjoy. If you can participate in this project, you can give kids a choice and give kids a happier and more fun Halloween. 

So, paint a pumpkin teal and grab some glow sticks because Halloween is just around the corner!!!!

“The TEAL PUMPKIN PROJECT and the Teal Pumpkin Image are trademarks of Food Allergy Research & Education (FARE).”

[outofangband]

Complex Trauma, Time, and Routine

Angband World building and Aftermath of Captivity Masterlist 

I’m going to use Maedhros, Húrin and Gwindor as case studies . Feel free to ask about any others

Trauma often has a marked effect on one’s sense of time and in complex trauma where every aspect of one’s life, schedule, and often perception are controlled, this is even more relevant.

Supplemental

Survivors of Angband often have severe time blindness following their escape or, in the case of the many rescued at the end of the war of wrath, liberation. A small number of prisoners rescued then were captured before the rising of the sun and moon

This occurs for a number of reasons:

It’s important to note that those captured prior to the rising of the sun and moon are completely unused to the ways in which time is measured and observed on the outside. There are few windows in the fortress and those that do exist do not allow in sun or moonlight

Lighting inside the fortress is heavily controlled and does not allow for the prisoners to measure time. Most prisoners are not allowed any devices or information that might allow them to measure time or make sense of schedules. 

The fortress of Angband itself has a very strict routine. It is a place of cold bureaucracy on many levels despite the violence and sadism common there. Much of the maintenance is overseen by Sauron and his Maiar assistants, a perfectionist in every sense who values precision and order as much as his master thrives in chaos and decay. Those who inhabit the fortress (whether by their own choice or because they are captured or enslaved) are organized into categories depending on their status and role and marked appropriately (x). Schedules and charts for maintenance are overseen by Sauron himself as well as the few higher ups who report to him.

For many of the captives however, little indication of order is given. They are worked long hours (if enslaved) though not always in consistent cycles, fed and taken to bathe (see my post about the forges) at seemingly random intervals, often denied basic resources and necessities, and subjected to random abuses and disruption. 

Lighting in the fortress is often dim as the Maiar and orcs have less need of it, the Maia able to adjust at will and the orcs having evolved to both see in darkness and utilize other senses. Torches in the areas they live in are lit seemingly at random and conditions are disorienting.

I headcanon that elves, being very connected to the world around them, have a very good internal clock and are very in-tuned to patterns and periodic changes in their surroundings, but much is put in place to strip them of this in Angband as routine and order is seen as a comfort to deprive the prisoners of. 

What’s more, being outside of one’s designated place is heavily punished. Leaving any room or station without permission, not attending to ordered tasks, attempting to disrupt or argue against the structures or power and more are met with cruel punishments and brutality as well as often alienation from fellow prisoners. 

Failure to complete orders in a given time frame is also grounds for punishment. 

Now certainly many manage to find a routine in this. There’s a level of monotony in the long work, short reprieve and then repeat that ultimately can’t be mitigated by the lack of physical time charts or such. But there is no doubt their sense of time is still greatly affected.

For Maedhros himself, who was often kept in darkness and who only saw measuring devices in Sauron’s workshop and occasionally the hourglass Morgoth keeps for completely benevolent purposes (relevant story probably too dark to link here but if you know the one I mean, yeah), time and space became null to him and his internal clock and sense of the world served only to cause him anxiety rather than provide useful information.

For Maedhros as a child, routine was important mainly because of the inherent chaos of such a large family of such lively, often too smart for their own good, spitfire Noldor. This was especially true when his brothers were younger and required (even more) oversight to prevent them from hurting each other or themselves accidentally. As they grew of course it would be on purpose that they’d cause trouble.

Maedhros was in Angband for the rising of the sun and moon (see first headcanon on that here). As Morgoth canonically shrouded Angband in hideous clouds and fumes, even when he was chained outside, he was unaware of the new lights and struggled to adjust to them following his rescue. His sleep schedule was disrupted because of nightmares and other symptoms but was also very severely impacted by the cycles of light he had no familiarity with.

This continued for a long time after Angband as well. The structure that was provided by and for Maedhros in the months and years after his rescue became a source of comfort and changes to it and random meetings and events could be deeply distressing though he quickly learned to hide it . He liked to know exactly what was coming. Of course in war times this was not always possible.

Now for Húrin, this is a rare area we do not have too much information on regarding how he is affected by this post Angband. I personally do not believe that Húrin ever regains a good concept of time and his imprisonment in Brethil where he was drugged to the point of severe disorientation does not help this in the slightest. His case is slightly difficult to speculate on simply given the insurmountable affects of the curse and having to See so much, it’s very hard to come up with a real life comparison. I do think though, as Húrin never has the chance to return to any sort of normalcy and so until his death he continues to suffer from severe disorientation regarding time.

It is also somewhat unclear how much, if at all, the weight of Morgoth’s curse affects his sense of time. 

Gwindor was somewhat used to subterranean environments as he hailed from Nargothrond however the running of Angband is of course radically different. Nargothrond models the natural world and utilizes a variety of natural lighting as well as torches. And he spent much time above ground as well. 

Sudden anxiety that he is not where he should be, over the passage of time, and in fear of punishment are all common for him

As always please feel free to ask more, this is one of my favorite topics

[simpurnatural]

Walking? Don’t know her.

Pairing(s): C!Dream x Prisoner!Reader, Warden!Sam x Prisoner!Reader - mentioned

(FEM!Reader)

Warning ⚠️: GOOD OLE SMUTTY SMUT! YOU GUYS KNOW THE DRILL!

A/N: Thank you guys so much for 500+ followers and as promised, the long awaited Dream x Reader oneshot. Also, details concerning the writing request marathon will be posted soon! <3

Any writing errors? Point them out! Love some helpful feedback! <3

REQUESTS ARE OPEN LUVS <3

“Welcome back!” Dream greeted with a smirk, watching as the platform brought the distance between the two of you to a close.

“Sammy brought you all banged up,” Dream frowned, seeing that you were limping.

“Yeah, you really pissed him off with the whole touchy touchy situation,” you mumbled as the platform met Dream’s cell floor.

“Good,” he replied, watching as you stepped off and stumbled slightly. “C’mere,” he ordered.

He pulled you towards him but had your back to his chest. You felt a pair of lips began to suck on your neck. Dream slipped a hand under your shirt and chuckled at your sudden intake of breath.

He cupped one of your breast in his hand and squeezed slightly. His thumb brushed over your nipple teasingly, making you moan.

“I told you, just say the word.” Dream reminded as your eyes squeezed shut. “Tell me how bad you want me.” He egged on, hard on pressing against the back of your thigh.

“Oh my God,” you gasped as he utilized his other hand to play with your tits “I need you so bad,”.

Now there was nothing holding him back. Dream spun you around then motioned you to jump into his arms. You complied, wrapping your legs around his waist instinctively.

He pressed his lips against yours, the kiss was soft and sensual. You let him slip his tongue into your mouth. He placed you on his cot carefully, not breaking the kiss.

He pulled discarded both your button down orange tops. That’s when he turned his attention back to your breasts. He gave one a wet kiss, taking note of your eyes rolling back.

Dream continued rolling his tongue against you nipples, making sure not to neglect the other. He was way more gentle compared to Sam and was certainly taking his time.

He left hickies that trailed down to your stomach. Then proceeded to pull your pants down slowly which revealed your clothed cunt. Dream left kisses on your inner thigh causing you to whine at the teasing.

“Relax,” he cooed, pressing the pad of his thumb against your bud.

He rubbed in a slow but steady circle, watching you slowly fall apart. Dream then leaned in closer to your pussy and let out a hot exhale.

It sent shivers through your body when he pressed his tongue flat against your core. You moaned so loud, thrusting into his mouth impatiently.

“Please,” you begged and Dream complied right away, pulling your underwear down.

He dived in deep, not worrying about drowning in your juices. A groan left his throat causing vibration to flow through you.

“Oh God, just like that” you encouraged, running hands through his hair. “Yeah-“ you moaned, pressing his face further between your legs.

But Dream didn’t seem to mind and liked to know he had this kind of control over you. He’d spend years eating you out just to see you this vulnerable.

He pressed his tongue past your folds and continued the motion until it drove you to your first orgasm. Dream brought his lips back to yours, allowing you taste yourself.

Dream then proceeded to pull down his pants and boxers. He lined himself up with your entrance and looked into your worried eyes. Big was a total understatement.

“You tell me to stop, I’ll stop” he says in a gentle tone.

“O-okay,” you nodded breathlessly before feeling his length slowly enter you.

You could’ve sworn that his cock would’ve torn your body in half by now but he wasn’t even a quarter of the way in.

“Stop.” you gasped at the feeling of being stretched, nails digging into Dream’s neck.

You stayed like that for a moment before telling him to continue. Dream slowly before surely bottomed out.

“You’re so tight,” he smirked, thrusting slowly.

You never saw Dream as sensual but here he was, cupping your face with one hand while the other propped him up. Whispering that you were doing so good for him.

Every thrust made your body jolt slightly. Your eyes had rolled back completely at the pleasure. Dream cock slowly driving you closer to your second orgasm.

You squeezed around him so tight, causing your body to shake at the intensity. Dream continuing his slow thrusts. through your high.

“F-faster,” you breathed, looking into his emerald green eyes.

Dream had no hesitation in picking up the speed, the sound of skin hitting skin could’ve been heard through the whole SMP.

He shifted his his weight so that he was on his knees, placing one of your legs over his shoulder. This allowed him easier access into you. Both of you were moaning each other’s names and curse words amongst other things.

“I’m so fucking close,” Dream announced, not failing to keep up the speed.

“Me too,” you replied, feeling him rubbing figure eights against your pussy.

Dream leaned in close and attached his lips to yours. Both his hand and hips working at an inhuman speed.

You broke the kiss as you came with a sob. Tears streaming down your face as all the stars in the sky were visible to your eyes. Dream came in you at the same time, filling you up nice.

Wordlessly, he pulled out of you slowly. Observed as your’s and his cum poured out of your cunt. Satisfied, he laid next to you and pulled the blanket over the two of you. Walking? Don’t know her...

...

HOPE YOU GUYS ENJOYED THIS ONE!

[cheri-translates]

[CN] S2 Gavin and MC in Chapter 19 (Part Two)

🍒 Warning: This post contains detailed spoilers from Season 2 🍒

My focus is on Gavin x MC interactions, so content relating to the plot will be in bullet-points :>

Part One: here

[ Notable Scene: Infiltrating the STF ]

MC: ...but aren’t you relieved from your duties?

Gavin seems to guess the words I haven’t said, and he lets out a soft, unnatural cough.

Gavin: I know every patrolling post in the STF, patrol timings and angles of the surveillance cameras. I can ensure that we’d get in successfully without anyone noticing. However, since I only saw his face from four years ago...

MC: I’ll go with you. As long as I see his face, I can point him out to you.

Gavin has a teasing smile in his eyes, perhaps seeing the urgency written on my face.

Gavin: In that case, let’s go for a walk in STF tonight.

-

Late at night, Gavin and I infiltrate the STF through an outer wall.

Pale moonlight outlines a misty halo around him, softening his edges.

He finds an open window with ease. Lifting me up, he lets me jump through the window before leaping in himself.

This appears to be a utility room.

MC: Captain Gavin’s really good at this.

Gavin: This is the STF. I won’t bump into anyone even with my eyes closed, much less the walls.

Before Gavin finishes speaking, Tang Chao walks in with a bowl of instant noodles, a wicked smile on his face while he pushes the door open.

Tang Chao: Instant noodles must be eaten on the sly. Otherwise, I might-

When Tang Chao sees Gavin, he pauses in his footsteps.

In this short span of time, we look at each other speechlessly, the only thing left being the steam rising from the instant noodles.

All of a sudden, Tang Chao rolls his eyes, his body doing a 180 degree turn. With the instant noodles in hand, he steps out of the door before closing it.

Gavin: ...

MC: ...didn’t you say you wouldn’t bump into anyone even with your eyes closed?

Moonlight streams in from the window, illuminating the side of his face clearly. I turn my head stiffly, watching as his Adam’s apple bobs slightly.

Gavin: Tang Chao is slacking off.

Tang Chao’s slightly frantic voice can be heard indistinctly.

Tang Chao: Since Captain hasn’t been around, there were changes to the duty roster... Please save me. That was so awkward. Oh no, I don’t want to run laps...

I stare at Gavin quietly. His expression has returned to normal, as though nothing happened.

Gavin: It’s okay, let’s continue.

Gavin listens to the surroundings calmly. After a moment, he pulls me out of the utility room.

Suddenly, a set of uniform footsteps can be heard from behind us.

STF Agent: ...

Even before we can turn, the regular footsteps turn into small, scattered steps, akin to busy bees fleeing in disarray. The surroundings slowly return to silence.

MC: Have we been completely exposed...?

With a soft cough, a reddish hue climbs up the tips of Gavin’s ears.

Gavin: It doesn’t count if we aren’t caught. 

Eli (through the speakers): Hey hey hey.

Eli’s voice suddenly drifts from the STF’s broadcast speakers. Gavin carefully pulls me over to hide in a shadowy corner of the corridor.

Eli (through the speakers): ...due to some indescribable reasons, all the surveillance cameras in the STF will take a break for 15 minutes. If a certain colleague wishes to go somewhere or do something, please do so quickly.

Gavin: ...

MC: Pfft.

Seeing Gavin’s slightly speechless expression, I can’t help but laugh aloud.

This person is protected by many people who are unafraid of anything, isn’t he?

After this, we occasionally bump into familiar faces. However, they seem to have made a prior arrangement, and choose to ignore us.

Gavin seems to hesitate on whether he should make an explanation, but it eventually turns into one sigh after another.

In the end, we “very successfully” step into the room with the “Eye in the Sky” system.

Using the system, Gavin retrieves footage from the football match, and MC is able to identify the wheelchair-bound man, Du Wen

Gavin then searches up information on him as well as his approximate whereabouts

The both of them find him in a small alley

He admits that he’s the founder of the Fulcrum Charity Organisation, and has been assisting Gray Rhino in whatever he can

He claims that he means them no harm. To prove this, he allows MC to read his memories

Although they find the circumstances too convenient and deliberate, MC reads his memories because why not

She notices that certain memories have been stored in a misty bubble, just like the “firewall” she installed for Gavin earlier

Still, she searches for memories from the New Years Change Incident

She "sweeps” these memories into her own mind, and confirms that he’s indeed a victim of the incident

Gavin asks how he should contact Du Wen in the future, and the latter says he’d appear during a safe time

Once they leave, MC tells Gavin that they can use the Golden Apple 2 to display the memories she saw

Gavin says that Du Wen’s words aren’t trustworthy, but at least they have some leads that could further guide them to the truth

The next afternoon, MC learns from Kiki that the exhibition hall will be re-opening the next day. So she contacts Gavin and plan to sneak into it that same night

When she arrives, there’s someone else with Gavin - an elderly man with a missing left arm

She finds him familiar

[ Notable Scene: MC meets Captain Yan ]

Gavin: MC, this is the old policeman, Captain Yan. Today, he’s mainly here to cover for us. Captain Yan, this is...

Captain Yan: No need for introductions. You’ve mentioned her many times.

Before I can express my shock, Captain Yan sends me a warm gaze.

Captain Yan: MC, we met once at the hospital. I always hear your name from this young lad, so I’m pretty familiar with you.

Captain Yan smiles teasingly, then gives Gavin a meaningful look.

Captain Yan: If he ever bullies you, remember to tell me. As his senior, I’ll give him a proper scolding.

MC: O-okay! Thanks, Uncle Yan.

Gavin: Cough. We’ll leave the pleasantries for next time. We should go now.

With this, Gavin speeds up and walks forward, a faint red hue climbing up the tips of his ears.

Seeing Captain Yan’s grin, I hurriedly lower my head and follow after him.

MC: Gavin, wait for me!

With Captain Yan keeping watch, MC and Gavin use the Golden Apple 2

In the simulated memories of the New Years Change Incident, Gavin notices post-injection bruises on Du Wen’s hand

Du Wen and those around him don’t seem to know what’s going on, but they’re frightened due to the sounds of gunshots and explosions outside

A handful of Evolvers revolt, but are shot to death by officers dressed in NW uniforms

Du Wen flees, and the both of them follow after him

In the end, they watch as a beam crushes the lower part of Du Wen’s body

At the same time, a drone in the simulation appears to take aim at MC

[ Notable Scene: Gavin’s Protection ]

Gavin: MC!

An urgent exclamation drifts to my ears. Turning to the voice, I see Gavin lunging towards me involuntarily.

Those amber eyes grow large in front of me. In the next second, I’m enveloped in Gavin’s arms.

My cheek is pressed tightly to his chest, and powerful heartbeats echo at my ear.

His heart is beating very quickly - so quickly that my heart subconsciously matches its frequency.

“Thump thump. Thump thump. Thump thump.”

It’s as though these powerful heartbeats are the only things left in the entire world.

In every difficult or dangerous situation, I’m always able to hear this sound.

It’s as though they have melded into my bloodstream, becoming a kind of instinct.

Gavin: It’s fine, there's no need to leave the system.

Gavin’s hand is by his ear. After stating his judgement calmly, he looks at me.

Gavin: Are you okay?

MC: Gavin, this is fake.

Gavin: Mm. But my body seems to have reacted a little faster than my brain.

His amber eyes reflect the blood-coloured sky, filled with worry and fret that he hasn’t had the time to shed off.

Gavin: Whether it’s real or an illusion, I don’t want you to get hurt in front of me.

MC: But they would simply pass through my body.

Gavin: Not even if they pass through.

He speaks unyieldingly.

MC: Okay, whatever you say.

Gavin: Let’s get out of here.

They continue looking at the chaos and hear the sounds of crying and screaming

Gavin appears composed, but the fingertips holding onto MC are quivering, as though he's barely suppressing his anger at the injustice before him

The scene shifts, and what appears before them is a NW laboratory

Du Wen has thick tubes stuck all over him, and he’s submerged in a gigantic apparatus

MC traces that the memory is from 2 months prior to the New Years Change Incident

A senior official from NW walks in, and he seems to be in charge of a secret experiment

[ Notable Scene: Gavin and MC’s Future Father-in-law]

His eyes are steadfast and icy, as though nothing can sway him.

And nothing can destroy or obstruct him.

Gavin stands rooted to the spot. He watches as the man draws closer and closer to himself-

And walks straight through him.

Gavin has already matured into someone whose height is on par with his. They have incredibly similar features, and they even share an identical straight and powerful gait.

However, Gavin doesn’t turn around. His entire body remains stiff until the world gradually gathers into a patch of darkness.

He doesn’t move. The faint white light causes him to look pale.

Slowly, he lowers his head, covering his eyes.

I stand behind him, not saying a word.

That senior official is Gavin’s father.

Once they’re out of the Golden Apple 2, Captain Yan notices how solemn Gavin looks

Gavin takes Captain Yan and MC to a simple apartment to talk

Gavin fills Captain Yan in on what they saw

Captain Yan and Gavin start discussing what happened, and MC heads over to the window to look at the view despite the best view being Gavin

Gavin brings up the laboratory, and Captain Yan asks if he saw “that person”. Gavin grits his teeth and says, “I saw him.”

[ Notable Scene: The End of Chapter 19 ]

Gavin: MC, I’ll send you home.

By the time Gavin comes up from behind me, Captain Yan has already left.

I notice Gavin’s tense lower jaw. He seems to be doing his best to appear natural in front of me.

To appear as though he doesn’t care.

Seeing this person before me, I feel my heart being clenched tight.

MC: Gavin, I want to go somewhere before heading home. Could you accompany me?

-

When we leap over the walls of Loveland High, confusion flashes across his eyes.

The gentle evening breeze brushes his fringe, and his figure is immersed in patches of moonlight.

It’s been a very long time since I last returned to this place. But images from this place always surface in my mind.

The field, the stairs, the roof, the gymnasium late at night, and the infirmary.

During that period of time I had re-lived, I wanted nothing more than for time to move a little faster.

So that I’d be able to reach that day when I could walk over to him a little sooner.

However, this year, I’m reluctant to let time pass by as quickly. 

During the time in which the wind blew by, that young man filled all my memories related to youth.

That’s how reluctant I am.

That’s why I’ve been walking slowly on purpose. Even so, in just the blink of an eye, he disappeared in the breeze of youth.

Pulling on Gavin’s hand, we walk along the field, and walk into the depths of the forest behind the school.

MC: Gavin, I think you’re angry.

I turn my head to the side to look at him. Gavin simply furrows his brows slightly, and it’s clear that he feels a little uneasy.

MC: You don’t need to pretend that nothing’s bothering you in front of me. Anger isn’t something you should feel ashamed of.

Gavin: I...

He opens his mouth, but something sews it up again.

A fierce wind suddenly rises, causing countless fallen leaves to swirl in the air.

They are reminiscent of incessant, agonised screams.

Gavin: I... just can’t understand. There are clearly many other methods. There are many other choices.

His words are blended into the wind, suppressed and pained.

I don’t turn my head to look at his expression. I simply stand beside him quietly, our fingers interlaced together, standing in the middle of the fierce gale.

With the flow of time, the fierce gale becomes calmer. In the end, it morphs into a gentle breeze, brushing our fringes.

Gavin: MC, thank you.

I shake my head, turning my head towards him.

MC: Gavin, do you know something? The reason why I brought you back here was to tell you that I hope your beautiful memories won't simply be confined to high school. Beautiful things should continue, and never end.

While saying this solemnly, my heart speeds up uncontrollably.

Gavin’s pupils quiver slightly, and he squeezes my hands tightly.

Gavin: Thank you.

Very softly, he repeats these words.

MC: Let’s walk around a little more before heading home.

I chuckle happily, my footsteps becoming incomparably lighter.

All of a sudden, my palm feels empty -

It’s as though Gavin released my hand.

Feeling puzzled, I turn around to find that Gavin had simply shifted his hand behind his back.

MC: What’s wrong?

Gavin: ...nothing.

When the girl’s confusion is dispelled and she continues walking forward, Gavin lowers his head to look at his vanished right arm, his expression composed.

As compared to his right hand disappearing the last time, the scope seems to have grown larger this time.

Gavin follows behind the girl calmly, contemplating quietly.

His time might be shorter than he imagined.

Gavin chuckles softly, the corners of his lips hooking upwards slowly.

Gavin: MC.

I pause in my footsteps and turn around, realising that we’re several footsteps apart.

MC: Gavin, what’s wrong?

Gavin: I just received news from Captain Yan. I might have to leave for a while.

MC: So suddenly?

Gavin: Sorry. After sending you home, I’ll set out.

He looks at me apologetically, as though suppressing something once again.

-

After returning home, I quickly remove my shoes and rush to the window to search for that figure.

Guessing that I’d do this, Gavin doesn’t leave immediately. He stands downstairs, waiting for me.

A gust of wind burrows in through the window, as though carrying with it slight reluctance as it makes gentle twirls around me again and again.

I lean my palm against the glass, wanting to say another farewell to him.

MC: Gavin, you must return safely.

💙 Calls and Moments: here

💙 Support the café by dropping by the tip jar!

[taki118]

Go Watch the Venture Brothers

So just heard the complete and utter Bullshit news that Adult Swim has cancelled one of (if not the best shows) they have the Venture Bros. This series is one of those shows that for WHATEVER reason never got to the level of fandom Rick and Morty has even though they’ve been at the genre parody game longer and in my opinion better. 

The series is about Rusty Venture former boy adventurer and failing super scientist who in an attempt to keep his head above water in debt goes around with his two boys Hank and Dean, and bodyguard Brock on misadventues while various legal archnemisis go after him, such as the Monarch. 

So if you never watched or never heard of this 7 season series let me give you a break down on why you should, 

1) Art Style & Animation

Venture bros is one of those rare Adult aimed animated series that that really truly tries to utilize their medium to the best of their abilities. Season 1 had like such a small budget and corners had to be cut so it can be a little hard to watch at times. 

But with each passing season they get a little better, a little more fluid, go just a little harder and it truly feels rewarding to watch. Like seeing an artist you follow online improve over the years. Like they COULD have stayed with the choppy and stiff animation from season 1 it fit right in with its fellow adult animated shows but it didn’t. They strove for quality to have something that matched the story they were telling.

2) The Writing 

Venture Bros has some of the tightest and consistently great writing of ANY serialized show I’ve seen, adult, animated or other wise. Wanna know why? Cause it’s all done by TWO people (save for like one ep each season where one other person is allowed to touch their baby). Yeah TWO people and they work their asses off every season to interject, humor, refrences, parody, plot and character development in equal measure. 

3) Character Development

Um yes in case you were wondering that’s right an adult animated show has CHARACTER DEVELOPMENT  that holds as the series goes on. Not to give spoilers but characters will go through changes in alignment, relationships will develop and change, some characters will go through negative arcs where they are straight up unbareable for a season before coming out the other side even better than they were before. There is no end of epsiode or even end of season reset. Characters, settings, and dynamics all change over the course of the show and it feels just so god damn good.

4) Story Development 

Just like the characters the story of the Venture Bros grows and changes each season. Things that are set up even as early as season one are paid off as the series goes on. Like not to be that bitch but you know how RIck and Morty teases an overarching plot ALL THE TIME but like will often just spit in the face of fans hoping for more than like one episode a season addressing it? Yeahhhhhhh that doesnt happen here, fans are consistently rewarded for putting the time in to rewatch and really think about what happened in the series. Characters that are seen in the background or are just referenced by other characters will be brought in to be recurring characters, things that start off as a small detail or gag will be given larger relevance and each time they do this you get that “OH I remember that from last season! So thats what it was!” The writers WANT you to rewatch, they WANT you to analyze and they WANT you to theorize, and they give you a show that gives back the time you put in.

5) Parody & Reference 

This series does a great thing with parody. They make real characters  who are just as enjoyable as the characters they parody, they make story lines that both poke fun at the absurdity of the media but shows the writers love for it. So often parody and references are just used to mock the thing but with Venture Bros you feel the love and care so when you know the thing being parodied you can laugh but feel good about laughing cause they are never laughing at a thing maybe you cared for in your youth but rather laughing with it.

And it’s never just one thing. When they parody a thing its often layered with other things to make it even more unique. Scooby-Doo is overlayed with famous criminals, Laura Croft is mixed Dr. Quinn Medicine Woman, GI Joe is given the look of the Village People and so on. They never go for the easy joke or reference. Hell theres an episode that starts with them reciting the lyrics to David Bowies Space Oddity for really no reason other than they could. They weave these things in naturally with their setting and characters so nothing feels out of place. Like if you dont catch a reference or parody you dont feel like “I think this isa reference to something?” like a LOT of things do not just adult animated shows. You arent taken out of the moment cause it all feels so natural. 

6) The Characters 

God damn these characters, I could go on for hours about these characters. From main to one off these are some of the most likeable characters you can find. I mean it when I say I can’t think of a single character I wish they had cut cause they are all so well created. Even the ones I hate i have fun hating cause they were made to be that way. I’ll be good though I’ll only talk about my absolute top faves.

- The Monarchs

You ever sit and wish villain couples could have functional  healthy relationships? Well look no further than Malcom Fitzcarraldo aka The Monarch and Dr. Shelia Girlfriend (yes that is her last name). The Monarch is a high strung impulsive saturday morning cartoon villain whos tendency to over react is only matched by his unspecified hatred of Dr. Venture. And Dr. G is his nonsense partner in crime who will cut a bitch if they don’t play by their admittedly weird rules. Both characters are great on their own but are better together. Though that doesnt mean they always get along. Like a real couple they have their ups and downs they fight, break up, make-up and grow stronger in their relationship with each season. 

- Shore Leave

Ok ok so I want you to imagine James Bond, mixed with GI Joe simmering in a cocktail of the most flamboyant gay men you have ever seen and you have one of my favorite gay characters/characters in general. Shore Leave is a member of OSI (the shows SHEILD/GI Joe parody organization) he’s loud, brash, flippant, sassy and highly competent at his job loving every second of getting to beat bad guys down within an inch of their life. I love seeing him play off the stoic Brock and the two have this great brotherly dynamic that’s never called into question. He also gets to have a very cute romance with Al the Alchemist (who is also great). I could talk about this man all day.

- Dr. Rusty Venture

They did such a good job with this man. He’s a self serving, sexist, perverted, whinny, self important asshole and yet you feel pity and genuine sympathy for him and want him to succeed. You can see how Dr. V was given a raw deal by his father who seemed to care more about his adventures than his sons well being and how this molded him into the bitter man he is today, but on the flip side you can see where he chose to use that as a crutch for his worst behaviors and impulses. Seeing him slowly grow and change and be an actual good father to his boys while all the while still be a giant dick is actually really great. 

- Dr. Byron Orpheus 

Ahhhhh Dr. Orpheus part Dr. Strange Parody part busybody stay at home dad, he’s just such a delight. Dr. Orpheus is a divorcee, with an unfulfilling job of maintaining order to the cosmos (which isnt as hard as one might think), and uses his magical ablities in ways most of us would (ie menial tasks and home chores). Overly dramatic and affectionate Dr. O is a delight whenever he appears, but he’s at his best around his daughter and old friends The Order of the Triad. 

Again I can go on but all these characters ranging from main to recurring are crafted with the utmost care for you to want to see them succeed or fail, to see them again even if you know it’ll never happen, and want them to cross paths with other characters. 

The Venture Bros is one of those series that I will ALWAYS recommend even to the pickiest of humor tastes. But if you don’t believe its as good as I said or don’t think the concept is to your tastes I’ll recommend a few eps that I think best show off the base idea of the series without giving much away. In terms of plot and spoilers, though somethings wont make a lot of sense. 

- S1 ep10 "Tag Sale – You're It!" - Dr. V is having a yard sale so of course all manner of costumed weirdos show up.  - S2 ep5 "Twenty Years to Midnight" - basically a fetch quest around the world to save the planet with daddy issues - S3 ep2 "The Doctor Is Sin" - Again daddy issues but with one of the best recurring characters and a great showcase of the series deeper emotional plots - S4 ep6 "Self-Medication" - Really embraces the parody as Rusty goes to a former boy adventurer support group.  Anyway the show is 7 seasons with 80 episodes, please go watch it. I will never forgive @adultswim​ for cancelling what was to be their final season. And in closing GO TEAM VENTURE!

[realcube]

yamaguchi + degradation 😈

summary: you’re riding yamaguchi to cheer him up from his failed volleyball team try-out and although he’s usually your sweet, kind, gentle boyfriend during sex, this time his frustration built up to the point where 'whore' slips from his lips..and you adored it.

somewhat of a part two of this: karasuno first years - praise or degradation?

trigger warning: vagina-having! reader, degradation, swearing, riding, daddy kink, mouth spitting, slapping, mouth-fucking, nsfw, dom!yamaguchi - minors dni!

thanks to anon for this request!

You’d think people would be lining up to get Yamaguchi on their volleyball team after he left Karasuno; I mean he’s a great leader, a good stagiest and an expert pinch server! 

However, you figured that wasn’t the case when Yamaguchi sat excitedly by his computer, anticipating the reply from the volleyball team he tried out for but once he read the email, to say he was disheartened was an understatement as he realised that he’d potentially have to quit the hobby he has been dedicated to for the last few years.

Once you arrived at your shared apartment, you could tell what news he had received based on his dejected expression. So, you spent most of the afternoon consoling him and watching movies but upon reading the situation further, you realised that it wasn’t a rejection worth of his tears as he convinced himself that this was a good thing, since he was now able to focus all his attention on his college education. 

But that didn’t mean your generous offer of riding him was declined. In fact, he said that it would cheer him up greatly.

So, that you ended here; bouncing on Yamaguchi’s dick, head tossed back with tears threatening to pour from the corners of your eyes as he held a steel grip on your waist, partially to stop you from falling but mostly so he could force you all the way down.

He clenched his jaw as he felt you go down on him at an excruciatingly slow pace, causing the frustration he already felt snowball into something much larger. The way Yamaguchi saw it, you knew he was tense yet you chose to continuously tease him, leaving him unable to release his vexation. 

No matter what you did though, Yamaguchi knew he was going to let out his emotions on you but whether that be in the form of cum or degradation was up to you. 

He was doing well keeping up his patience, kind boyfriend façade up until you were at a loss for breath and your thighs were burning so you hovered over his cock, barely taking his tip, vigorously rubbing your clit as you took a moment of pause to regain feeling in your legs. 

That’s when he snapped.

His hands which were gripping tightly on your waist jerked downwards, forcing you to take him in again, causing a light gasp to escape your lips. "Whore" He hissed through gritted teeth, “Just take it, what’s the issue?” It wasn’t much of a question as he didn’t even give you a second to collect your thoughts before jouncing you on him once more, then again, then again, until he felt himself on the verge of an orgasm.

Obviously, you noticed his sudden change in attitude and you were definitely surprised but you’d be lying if you said you weren’t enjoying it. The feeling of his strong arms overpowering you and the sound of that nickname falling from his lips left you weak in the knees - or maybe that was due to the fact you’d been bouncing on his dick at a furious pace for god-knows how long.

Though, you didn’t mention anything until you felt yourself climaxing alongside Yamaguchi, reaching your orgasm as soon as you felt him flood your insides with his cum. “More, daddy~” You pleaded, eyes rolling back into your head as you desperately clawed at his chest.

Yamaguchi’s breath faltered slightly upon hearing that name, but it his relentless pace wasn’t effected as he continued to ride out both his and your own orgasm, only pulling out once you were completely filled up with his cum. “One more round for my little slut.” He smirked, watching as you lay sprawled across his chest, completely out of breath.  

He didn’t care to put too much energy into fucking you today - what have you done to deserve his energy? - so he simply scooted out from underneath you to get on his knees, looking down at your exhausted figure on the bed.

His finger found it’s way under your chin to tilt your face up to look him in the eyes, “Say 'ah'” He commanded, his hand slowly travelling from your chin to the back for you head, tugging a fistful of your hair. 

Like the obedient cum-slut you now were, you parted your lips to form an ‘o’ shape, ready to graciously accept whatever he intended to put in there. As you gazed up at him, a shiver ran down your spine upon noticing how different he looked - hovering above you with his bangs hanging down in front of his face, however you could still clearly make out the satisfied spark in his eyes. 

“Now, be good.” He spat with his eyes narrowed, but before you could hum in compliancy, he rammed his cock straight in your mouth, utilizing the hand he had latched to your hair in order to rock your head back and forth in unison with his hips.

Low groans echoed through the room, you shifted your eyes up to look at Yamaguchi’s face and although his bangs hid most of his expression, you could tell he was having the time of his life; while you were on the verge of tears, your throat burning from being mercilessly face-fucked by your boyfriend’s alter-ego.

And he didn’t stop until those tears were streaming down your cheeks and his cum was half-way down throat.

Eventually, he removed his length from your mouth, resulting in you taking a much-needed gasp of air before tilting your head up to stare at him, pursing your lips as you awaited your well-deserved, after-sex kiss. However, your pout was simply met by Yamaguchi tightly gripping your jaw, yanking your face up so the tips of your noses met.

His sudden action caused you to gasp once more, hence Yamaguchi took advantage of your parted lips to spit in your mouth. “I’m not fucking done yet.” He snarled, using his spare hand to deliver a harsh slap to your bare thigh, causing you to wince slightly, “Spread your legs.”

You blinked rapidly, taken aback by the fact he still had the energy to continue consider the fact the tips of hairs were glistening with sweat and his breathing audibly heavy. 

He didn’t take your delay too kindly, though.

Another slap landed on your ass, “Hurry up!” He barked, exerting his fist on your shoulder to push you back, resulting in you landing with your back against the sheet, submissively gazing up at him once again. However, this time you didn’t let your awe get in the way of following his orders as you hastily jerked your legs apart, revealing your soaked cunt to him.

 That was the first time you saw him smile that whole night but if you remain his docile cum-slut, it definitely wouldn’t be the last.

[lorenzobane]

Harebrained Scheme

AN: Written for @trektober-challenge first installment- namely Prime Directive, but more specifically inspired by some of @fractal-baby discussion about Spock’s absolutely insane plans. It was written pretty quick and definitely playing fast and loose with timelines, but set after ST:ID but before ST: Beyond. Can be read as pre-Spirk, but the major relationship is Jim & Sarek chatting. 

Can be found on AO3 here

Being kidnapped and held with his First Officer’s father was never exactly the plan for Jim. There are, in fact, a lot of people Jim would rather be kidnapped with. Namely, the aforementioned First Officer Spock.  

But as it stands-- 

“We have been held here for approximately 2.3 hours,” Sarek says after a moment of silence. 

Jim nods, “don’t panic.” 

Sarek gives him a look that plainly says Vulcans don’t panic. “I am simply stating a fact of our capture.” 

“Yes, sir,” Jim says patiently. “I’m aware of how long it has been.” 

“The temperature is several degrees below Vulcan standard,” Sarek pointed out. 

“I am aware of that as well,” because Jim was. Whoever their enemies were, they knew who they had kidnapped. The temperature is holding steady at a place where Jim is uncomfortable but is draining Sarek. 

Sarek says nothing and continues to observe the cell around them calmly. Jim has been pacing since he woke up about an hour ago. It’s a plain white room with no windows and no doors as far as he can tell. He’s tried clawing at just about every inch of the sterile space, and as far as he can tell, nothing gives. 

“What are the walls made of?” Kirk mutters to himself. They don’t feel like metal or even plastic- they radiate the coolness as if they’re some type of natural product, but the way the room is sealed tells him some kind of technology is involved. 

Sarek cuts into Jim’s thinking with a, “I believe these are made of Betazoid limestone.” 

“What makes you say that?” Jim asks. With Spock, he’ll usually prattle for a few minutes, discussing density and texture before giving him an answer as straightforward as his father. 

Sarek looks at him in surprise, “you are not able to tell?” 

Jim resists the urge to reply with sarcasm. Sarek isn’t Spock, which is plainly apparent in every interaction they have. Though Spock always seems extremely calm and balanced to Jim, being around his father makes Jim aware of how much more emotion and variation Spock regularly expresses. 

“No,” Jim says. “I haven’t spent much time on Betazoid.” 

Sarek nods, “I was briefly an Ambassador there in my son’s youth. He was very fond of the rock and found its cool texture pleasing.” 

“I thought it would be illogical to find a rock pleasing,” Jim replies without thinking. 

Sarek is quiet for a moment before responding with, “yes, indeed it was. However, as my wife put it to me then, there is nothing illogical about curiosity. The desire to explore. I am not sure I agree with her, but I have never been successful in curbing my son of any habit he does not wish to break.” 

“He can be stubborn,” Jim replies with amusement.

A mild understatement if Jim has ever said one. Though he is always respectful and never veers into full-on insubordination, Jim now understands what Pike meant when he referred to Spock fondly as an ‘extremely independent First Officer.’ Jim doesn’t mind it, maybe even loves it- the way Spock is relentless when he is convinced of the correct course of action. The argumentative (logically debated, in Spock’s words) messages and memos coming at all hours until Jim either gives in or says the phrase, “drop it, that’s an order.” 

Which, at the very least, shuts him up for a shift or two. 

“Do you believe they will be able to find us?”

Jim shrugs, his communicator is still on his person, and he tries it every few minutes, but he keeps getting static. “None of my messages are going through, but as you mentioned, your son is very stubborn and an extraordinary Starfleet officer. If anyone could rescue us, it would be him.” 

Sarek nods again, and they sit in silence while Jim continues to search every square inch of space. It doesn’t make sense- unless their captors beamed them into the room, there is no way for them to have entered without a door of any kind. 

“My son,” Sarek says, somewhat awkwardly pulling Jim out of his observation of the walls once more. “How is he-- I mean to say, I recognize as one of the very few Vulcans at Starfleet, and now as an endangered species, it may be challenging for him.”

Jim kindly doesn’t say that Sarek didn’t actually ask a question and responds with, “the crew loves him. He fits in great and has a surprising number of friends. The kids in the Science department all think he’s some type of rock star. The amount of transfer requests I get specifically for his division is getting out of hand.”  

“Rock star?” Sarek repeats back. 

“A term for an old Terran classical musician who was known for extreme popularity,” Jim responds with some curiosity. Spock is exceptionally familiar with Terran classical music and had known precisely what Jim had meant when he used similar phrasing. Still, Jim supposes that perhaps he picked it up in his many years on earth.

“I am gratified to hear this,” Sarek replies, somewhat slowly. Jim jerks up, alarmed, when he realizes that it appears that each blink is getting slower and slower as if he were fighting falling asleep. “He has so few affiliates on Vulcan.”

“Really?” Jim asks, surprised. 

For all Spock can be logical, sarcastic, and moralistic to the point of exhaustion, he’s also a kind friend, a shockingly understanding commanding officer, and a good sport about most things. He even participates in some ship-wide events, like the talent show where he played some genuinely excellent Vulcan lute. 

And purely for Jim’s amusement, played a lute version of a truly ancient Terran classic that Jim has a soft spot for, Wildest Dreams. 

“He… Was an unusually brilliant student,” Sarek says, still slow as if fighting for words. Jim realizes with an urgency that he should probably try to keep Sarek talking to keep him awake. 

“Vulcans didn’t like brilliant students?” Jim asks with amusement. The idea of Spock being a nerd among nerds is somewhat hilarious. 

“No, they did not like an unusually brilliant half-human,” Sarek replies, his voice for the first time that Jim has ever known him touching with a hint of sadness. “And he was… Willful. Unusually brilliant, and ferociously unselfconscious about his mother.” 

Jim laughs a little at that, rubbing his neck unconsciously, “yes, I definitely learned the hard way that you shouldn’t insult his mother.” 

“As did many,” Sarek says, his eyes closed. “He had a violent physical altercation when he was eleven for a similar reason. It was that disrespect of his mother that ultimately caused him to turn away from the Vulcan Science Academy.” 

“He didn’t go to VSA because they insulted his mother?” Jim asked, surprised. “Why would they insult Amanda anyway?” 

Sarek takes a sharp breath at the casual use of his wife’s name, and Jim feels terrible. After months of playing chess with Spock, they had begun discussing their childhood and Spock often spoke of his mother glowingly. He had insisted that they use her name to honor her memory. 

“They referred to her blood as a disadvantage. I knew the moment they said it; he would never accept a place that looks down on humans. He could be illogically loyal.” 

“His illogical loyal behavior saved you on Vulcan, and it saved earth,” Jim replies, his voice sharper than he intends it to be. 

Sarek opens his eyes at that, slowly and blearily, “I did not mean that negatively. I have come to find that many of the traits I viewed as… Aberration in him, in his youth, has come to define his tremendous successes.” 

Jim doesn’t say, though he dearly wants to, that viewing his child’s personality as an aberration at any point is pretty illogical. Still, Spock is a subject that Sarek is willing to stay awake and speak about, so Jim asks, “like what?”

“Well,” Sarek says wryly, “his disregard for rules he simply disagrees with. It is, presumably, the reason that he works so well with you and your idiosyncratic leadership style.” 

“I would not say that Spock isn’t interested in the rules,” Jim replies with surprise, the betrayal of Spock’s report after they saved him from a volcano still kind of stings. 

“He follows the rules he believes in avidly, that is true,” Sarek says, his voice does hold amusement now. “But he regularly ignores them if he wishes to. I presume you are referring to his report after the events of Nibiru?”

Jim jerked in surprise, “how did you know--?” 

“My son and I have been keeping close correspondence after the destruction of Vulcan and the loss of his mother. We are attempting to… work through the strain our relationship was put under while I worked through my disappointment that he did not go to the Vulcan Science Academy.” 

“Isn’t disappointment illogical too?” Jim asks. It is hard for him to hear the casual way Sarek describes his feelings towards Spock when Jim truly and completely believes that his First Officer is one of the finest beings he has ever encountered. 

Sarek makes a noise of agreement, “you are correct. Vulcans may take a vow to control our emotions, and we certainly may attempt to utilize logic in most decision-making. Still, there is no doubt that our species can be vulnerable to prideful behavior.” 

Jim, having beaten Spock at chess a few times, can attest to that. 

“What did he say about Nibiru?” Jim asks, curious now as to how Spock described the events to his father. 

“I believe,” Sarek says again, his voice rich with amusement now, “that you saw yourself as the rule breaker in this scenario. However, after listening to his entire recounting, I must ask you- whose idea was it to freeze the volcano?” 

Jim looked at Sarek blankly, “Spock’s. He had been reviewing the geothermal events on the plant. He calculated the likelihood of explosion was incredibly likely, so he asked if he could try one of his experiments to save the planet.” 

“You realize that the plan itself, from its initial conception, violated the Prime Directive, do you not, Mr. Kirk?” 

Jim looked at Sarek blankly, “what?” 

“It is against the Prime Directive to interfere with a planet’s destiny in any way. Then, the matter of his cold fusion device. An entirely novel invention that had gone through no formal testing, no review process… He simply believed it would work, conducted experiments in his free time, and wanted to use it. And had a captain who trusted him.” 

Jim blinks again at Sarek. “But… But…” 

Sarek leaned his head back, “do not feel bad. He was somewhat infamous for this when he was a boy. His capacity to convince his instructors that his personal pet projects were highly logical and beneficial regardless of external forces was… Remarkable. And in you, I think he has finally found a place where his prodigious intellect is not being checked by constant regulation.”

“Spock always follows regulation,” Jim defends on instinct, his mind reeling. 

“He always follows the ones he believes deserve to be followed,” Sarek corrected. “He has always had a somewhat unusual penchant for attempting novel actions without the traditional Vulcan tendency of deep contemplation.” 

Oh, the thought hit Jim suddenly. Spock is a Vulcan bad boy. Jim doesn’t know why he finds that so shocking; Spock does, after all, go along with a majority of his plans and even comes up with half of them. Even more damning, if Spock did not agree with a course of action, it relatively rarely ends up occurring. 

Which means… Spock is actually as goddamn reckless as he is. 

Jim isn’t sure how he feels about this revelation. 

“He... He tricked me!” Jim cries out eventually, unable to contain it. 

“But as I have said,” Sarek adds, his voice is shallow and slow now, “I have come to realize… These qualities, his capacity for creativity, and quick thinking have allowed him to become the most remarkable of us.” 

“I’m glad that you could see what we have always seen,” Jim says, though he’s more using the royal “we.” 

It took him considerably longer to see what was right there in front of him, but once he had, it made sense to Jim that Spock had been a popular professor, First Officer, and Advisor in his time at Starfleet. 

“I was unwilling to admit it, but I was worried when he chose Starfleet. So far from his people, alone and living in an abundance of difference. Vulcans can be quite homogeneous.” 

“Infinite diversity in infinite combinations,” Jim quoted from Spock’s eternal sermons. 

“Ironic that it is a Vulcan philosophy when so many of us view the world so similarly,” Sarek said, inclining his head slightly. “However, in a land of difference, he was able to find a space for himself that he was unable to find with his people. He always did appreciate adventure, read illogical books with his mother like Alice in Wonderland and Sherlock Holmes. Even Shakespeare which his instructors on Vulcan never enjoyed.” 

Jim raised his eyebrows again. Spock often quoted fanciful literary classics in trying situations. Still, it never entirely occurred to him how oddly poetic and even artistic that would have made him in a different place. 

“I hope he knows that I hold him in high regard,” Sarek says after a moment, and his eyes drift shut again, his breathing going slow. 

“No,” Jim leaps up. “No, you can’t. I can not be responsible for the death of two of Spock’s parents.” 

“Captain Kirk,” Sarek says with exhaustion, “do not worry. I can place my body into a healing trance that will allow me to remain stable for an extended period of time if need be. The Betazoid limestone will make us challenging to track and as such--” 

Just then, there is a loud thudding noise on the wall to their right, like something heavy just rammed into it at full speed. 

A thudding again, and then Sarek shudders awake, “Spock?” 

Jim doesn’t hear anything but Sarek does because he turns to Jim and says, “please move 3.87 feet to your left.” 

Three seconds later, a thud outside the wall gives way to what appears to be an ancient wrecking ball. 

“What is that?” 

“I think it is your crew, Captain,” Sarek says. 

Another beat and a large stone crash through the wall using a device that is an ancient Terran wrecking ball. 

“Captain,” Spock said calmly through the hole he just blasted through the wall. “I see you’re unharmed. Father, it is gratifying to see you safe as well.” 

“Glad you got to us in time; we were running out of gossip about you,” Jim says with a smirk as he slowly starts to try to clamber through the slightly too small hole. 

“Please refrain from joking,” Spock says, guiding his father through the hole much more gracefully. 

“Who’s joking?” Jim replies. 

Spock looks to his father with an eyebrow up, and Sarek responds, “while I would not term it “gossip,” the captain is correct, and our mutual affiliation with you helped pass a majority of the time.” 

Jim nearly cackles at the brief look of horror that passed over Spock’s face when he replies with a steady, “indeed.” 

Jim smirks and is silent while Spock focuses on calling the Enterprise to beam up. 

And much later, when Spock asks him what they discussed while Spock and Jim played their usual game of chess, Jim can be entirely honest when he says, “your many admirable qualities.” 

It’s definitely worth the way Spock’s ears turn a light green.