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vnshkk · 5 years ago

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Let's talk about Kyo's media blackout.

It is with a slight reluctance that I post this. It's not wise to mention Tanuki online nor share what they talk about within the overseas fandom for a multiple of reasons.

1. I don't want them to get angry at me

2. I don't want the overseas fandom to flip out and judge the Japanese fandom

3. I just want everyone to be chill and happy and flowers

But I've seen a lot of people freaking out, a lot of random theories floating around and people worrying so I wanted to post this theory and open it for discussion.

Of course this isn't fact. It's pure speculation. But given the timeframe, PERSONALLY I feel like this may have had something to do with Kyo decision.

So I post this with two DISCLAIMERs.

1. As mentioned this is not in any way fact. There is no proof that Kyo does or doesn't look at Tank. I simply find it interesting the sequence of events, the timing of the media blackout and I am only translating this for those who are interested. I hope this doesn't cause any huge arguments or any bad blood. It's simple here to discuss and consider.

2. Please do not judge the whole fandom based on Tank. Just like any forum, any comment section on the world wide web; there will be people who leave negative feed back. It is a tiny portion of people and not a reflection of the Japanese fandom as a whole. Judging them based on what they said would be like someone looking at negative comments or sarcastic jokes on Tumblr and judging the English speaking fandom. That's not to say what they post is okay, but it's just dumb shit posting and shouldn't be taken to heart.

you get me fam?

Okay, so I contemplated posting screenshots and translating what happened immediately after Kyo changed his profile picture up to when he deleted everything but as I said I don't want to be taken out by angry tank users so I'm just gonna translate a selection of posts.

These posts are taken from the Meg thread (remember the girl linking arms with him at a concert? That's Meg.) which to be honest is a shit show. It was a thread born from those notorious pics and for over a year now has remained a place where people post rumours, shit talk, complain and just make shit up a lot of the time. So please, AGAIN, bare that in mind. It is a place of negativity born from a scandal that shocked a lot of the fandom. Aint nothing nice ever gonna be said there. Periodt. In reality a lot of the people who post there are still fans of Kyo. I think they're just still a little hurt by the way it came to light about Meg.

After Kyo posted his new picture I checked tank before going to bed because I was curious about what their reactions would be and everyone had exploded. During the 7 hours I was asleep Kyo deleted everything and left the internet forever so tbh given the fact he was probably bored in a hotel in Fukuoka, just did a radio show, probs wanted to see peoples reaction, etc I personally, believe he was on Tank. This is a running theme in the thread itself and people often say he actively browses it (this is not a major thing, a lot of guys in bands browse tank same as celebs browse twitter. Why Kyo would look at the meg thread in particular? idk. )

SO TLDR

Yesterday around 7pm the thread suddenly changed to mixed reactions after Kyo changed his Twitter pic.

"His new twitter icon had me shook lol"

"I hope he changes his instagram one too"

"Idk I don't like how quickly he's become some kind of social media old fogey"

"Kyo's turned into a social media monster too" (*edit; my bad Yuchi is beer monster, Shinya is social media monster lol)

"It's kinda cheap"

"I get you, it's like he's lost his values" (probably because Kyo has always made big deal about how much of himself he shares)

It continued like that for a while with people more or less saying the same thing until he posts about leaving social media.

"He just suddenly said he's not gonna do social media anymore"

"lol after he went to all the effort of changing his profile picture"

"I'm shook"

"annoying 40 year old nut job"

"Bet you he came on here"

"Do you normally change you icon then quit"

"Join Kyo online"

"idg why even though Kyo's had so many haters since he first started twitter he's suddenly affected by it??"

"I still think he's cute even when he's sulking like this lol"

"I knew he was looking at Tanuki"

"I don't get why he's suddenly deleting it after all this time?? It's like what is this old man on about?"

"It's lame how he's making such a big deal of out saying he's quitting"

(lots of people agreed with this post saying that he's acting childish)

"I wonder what happened? Like everything seemed fine recently. I mean we'll never know but like I'm sure he has a lot going on.."

"I can't believe he basically wiped his instagram clean but left all the pics of cake and omurice lmao"

"If only he'd go to sleep earlier and eat a banana the serotonin would fix everything"

The random comments and mixed reactions continued for all of Friday. One of the main points that stuck out after the initial reactions was how people began to become suspicious that this was merely a tactic to get people to join Kyo online with people claiming this was typical of business man kyo, that it was about that time of year where they usually begin to advertise and promote in order to get new members.

So, allow me to play devils advocate for a second. As someone who is a member of Kyo online I have to admit since he started posting more and more online (compared to hardly ever on Kyo online), the membership has become more or less invalid. In the past it was worth the money for the videos and pictures that as fans we rarely saw. But if he's going to post them online then it raises the question (tickets to concerts aside) is there any point in being a member if you can just get the content for free? I'd imagine that this plays some kind of role in why the reactions are often negative. Members of Kyo online have suddenly gone from having something exclusive that was only for them, to simply being a part of something anyone can access.

Another point someone brought up is that whilst it's acceptable for Kyo to be upset. It is very, very childish and the timing is selfish. Sukekiyo literally made their instagram days ago and suddenly Kyo states how he isn't going to post online anymore. This act instantly casts a negative feel on Sukekiyo's insta. It almost gives a vibe that any picture Kyo is in might be "against his will". Kyo is not new to criticism. He's been in this game for 20 plus years. Everyone who is in the Indies scene knows about Tank. Every fan, every bandmen, knows it's a bad place filled with mostly shit posting and rumours and doesn't represent fans a whole.

The meg thread is simply fans flogging a dead horse, posting any poor Japanese girl with a straight fringe and some tattoos, anyone who looks even a little like Meg and saying she MUST be a groupie of Kyo. Which begs the question why would Kyo go there? Why would he look at that? Why would he want to subject himself to that kind of thing and then punish the majority for some dumb comments a few bored fans made? What was he expecting by going there?

Of course there is no proof Kyo lurks. But the reality is he probably does, I mean he's only human, he' s bound to be curious about fans reactions for Madara, etc and where else to get honestly reactions than an anonymous forum? Personally, as someone who has lurked tank for a few years now, I think he reads it. There have been times in the past where he's mentioned certain things, done certain things and I've thought "hmmm that's weird tank was literally talking about that". But once again there's no proof. It's just one of those vibes you get sometimes. (one major one I can think of is during the interview for mode of gauze where he said everyone massively complained about it. I know people can submit questionnaires after lives but I feel that a lot of Japanese people are more brutally honest when they can hide behind anonymity. )

Considering the "staff" posted a pic of his feet on the sukekiyo instagram today, I feel like this is just Kyo being (sorry to say) butthurt and it might just blow over. A lot of the comments mention his age, mention how he's clearly trying and failing to copy 20 year olds by using insta, that he's lame or cringe and that's gonna hurt anyones pride. But I honestly think Kyo should be looking at the billions of comments on instagram of people who love him rather than a few trolls online.

So with that being said I hope this was an interesting read and gave a little insight into why Kyo is often private. It was a big deal that he was posting so much and actively using instagra. I for one was very happy. I believe that in this day and age it is something that is required in order to engage with your audience and keep a good relationship. Hazuki and Ruki are good examples of this and Ive been saying for the longest time I wish Kyo would get more on board with it. So it's a shame he's left at the first hurdle.

Oh well. This is why we can't have anything nice isn't it.

#Kyo #dir en grey #instagram #translation #sukekiyo #drama I don't like drama why can't we all just be chill #remember this isn't fact its just my theory

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agustdef · 5 years ago

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Here & Now - Chapter 14

Pairing: Yoongi x OC

Genre: Fluff; Chill romance

Word Count: 2,240

Warning: None.

Banner Marker: @dee-ehn

For the twentieth time that afternoon I opened Twitter up and began to type up a post, but halfway through stopped myself and threw the phone to the side. The urge to respond to people being dumbasses was so strong.

"Do I need to take your phone away?" Yoongi asked.

He wasn't looking at me, just typing away in the notes app on his phone. Something about lyrics he needed to get out and not being in the mood to go look for his notebook.

"Maybe."

Without missing a beat or stopping his typing he extended on of his hand out to me. I picked up the phone and was going to place it in his hand, but snatched it back at the last moment.

"Wait, no. I'll just lurk on Instagram. I'm sure making myself hungry looking at food pics will make me forget the antis and the fans defending your virtue against me."

He scoffed, eyes flickering over to me finally. "Defending my what? There is nothing to defend. I'm an adult who can live their life how I please. I'm allowed to whisper to my friends and not automatically be in some secret relationship."

'Tell them that' is what I wanted to say out loud in a very snarky voice, but refrained. Instead, I just went to Instagram and scrolled through the posts. Nothing to piss me off, because I refused to look at the comments under my most recent posts. I'd done that like an idiot the day the news dropped.

And it was so annoying because it wasn't news. It was some "fan" sneaking a high-quality camera into the show and finding the right angle to snap pictures. They'd gotten quite a few, mostly of the boys. Some of Halsey. Some of me talking and laughing with the boys and Halsey. But that hadn't mattered at all, because even though I'd had Joon and Jungkook whisper things to me at different times, it only mattered that Yoongi did. Because goodness forbid we be seen together being comfortable twice in the span of months.

Most didn't care, but the vicious little circle of toxics that always tried to start shit were laying it on thick. And they easily roped in the trolls of who gave a shit about piling onto k-pop drama and not the music itself. Even worse were the newer and naive fans who just listened to what they were told with no fact-checking.

It was annoying and less stressful than I thought a "scandal" would be. Probably because they were stupid rumors and most were telling them to lay off. Most ARMY, other fandoms, and multis seemed to get it.

But I had to admit the racism and comments about my appearance or quality of work were pissing me off. And were the main reason I was ready to go on a rant, but I didn't want to make things crazier because I went on a rampage.

"So...," Joon said as he entered the room.

He'd been sitting on the couch beside me, but then vanished for twenty minutes when he got a phone call. When he left he'd looked stressed, but now he seemed calmer; though the phone was still clutched in his hand.

"What's up?" I asked.

"So, I know you've wanted to rage at the world for the past day and a half. And you are also free to do whatever you please, no matter what anyone says. And that you haven't for our sake, but Bang PDnim said he wouldn't be upset at all if you addressed it. He welcomes it, actually." He spoke so slowly, as if testing the waters, that I'd gotten annoyed halfway through.

For a moment I weighed my options because I'd honestly been more worried about the backlash on them and Bang being upset with me more than them being trash to me. They wouldn't affect my job as a producer at all, they didn't have that power. And if they hate bought my books to do whatever with them it would just be more money towards me getting royalties.

In the end, the energy didn't seem worth it, but then the option to go live on Insta presented itself and a smile formed. "How does a live sound? Haven't done one in a while for my normal few people who care. I know they'll be lurking there."

Joon put the phone back to his hair and asked, after a few seconds he said his goodbyes and hung up.

"Go ahead," he said.

Without a word, I got up and headed to the kitchen, it was where I did most of my lives. Which made me happy that we'd (Hals) had chosen my place to hang out, I didn't want those questions about where I was for the first half an hour as people appeared.

Propping my phone in its usual spot I got the live started and moved off-camera to grab a can of pop from the fridge. When I returned there were about thirty people present and the number was steadily climbing.

"Yeah, I think the last live was like a month ago. Probably something book-related too," I said in response to a question.

A few more minutes ticked by and the number reached several hundred and then I knew it was time.

"Hello, my people. How are you? I hope you're good or not as shitty as you were the day before. Thought I'd do a live because it's overdo and for another reason. Though today won't be music or writing focused, just us talking. And then me going into a monologue at some point."

The chat flooded with responses and asking me how I was. A second later came the first asshole, which didn't surprise me. In fact, I'd expected they'd appear faster than ten minutes in, they were slipping.

"I'm good. Tired, but I'm on a tiny break from all my work. No music to make and ahead of writing-related deadlines. This weekend has been me being forced to relax until things ramp up again next weekend."

Where is the music? It's so quiet. Someone commented.

"Oh, shit you're right. I've been around people all day and can still hear them in another room, so it seems louder to me. Alexa play Always and Forever playlist."

A few seconds later and the sound of Missy Elliot's Lose Control was filling the space.

The number had climbed to the thousands in the blink of an eye and there were more people with k-pop profile pics. Some of them were familiar from other streams, some of them asking me a thousand and one BTS questions. The few were those that were obviously by trash and or trolls; who were the ones I wanted there the most.

What are you working on music wise?

"Well, I'm mostly finishing up projects. I'm going on a half forced, half chosen break for a month. So no new projects as of last week. I'll be finishing up most of my stuff in a week or two and then I'll still have other things, but they aren't as pressing."

But what specifically?

"You know I'm not answering that one. I never do."

There were a few requests for a tiny hint and some all capped ones about if any of those projects were SUGA related stuff.

"Maybe," I said, giving no context to what I was answering.

In my teasing, I hadn't noticed Yoongi until he came in and bumped me to the side with his hip. He took up half the screen and his head blocked me from being able to read the screen at first. I had to lightly shove him to the side.

But even without looking I knew that chat was losing its shit.

"So, you do have a break after all?" He asked in English, his tone accusing.

I rolled my eyes and tried to focus on finding the questions where people weren't excited. His appearance was sending the viewers into numbers I'd never hit before, I should have started the live with him there.

"I never said I didn't have a break coming up. All of you just started scolding me without asking other questions."

WHAT IS YOONGI DOING THERE?!!??!!!!

SHSJSKSKSKA

She said all. Is all of BTS there?

skskskksks what is goign on?

Told you they were dating.

I made a face at the last one, turning to him with a 'what the fuck' face, one he also returned.

Then I turned my attention to the screen. "We aren't dating. We're working together. We're friends. That's it. You all have literally seen pictures with Hals so in my face we're almost kissing and not one dating rumor has appeared. And that would also be false."

"Why didn't we get any dating scandals when we worked together?" Joon asked in Korean off-camera, slowly moving closer.

"Because we obviously radiated big sibling energy," I responded.

Yoongi chuckled beside me, a smirk on his face.

"See, even Yoon agrees."

Joon opened and closed his mouth, probably trying to find a response to that. But then he just huffed. I thought it was over after that, but then he mumbled something.

"I don't give off sibling energy."

From there on it just the three of thus talking about how he does, reassuring him that it's only with certain people and just otherwise talking shit.

"Pay attention to you live people. You have everyone confused and only like 20 people understand what you're saying," Halsey shouted from wherever she was.

We'd gotten so caught up I had forgotten about the live and didn't realize we'd speaking purely in Korean. Turning back to the screen I read the comments that were now zooming by faster than I could read.

what are they saying?

She speaks Korean?

HELLO PAY ATTENTION TO US

Was that Halsey?!??!?!

"Yes, that was Halsey." I turned towards the doorway and yelled, "Bring your butt out here."

There was shuffling and one set of footsteps turned into multiple and soon the kitchen was flooded with people. The space felt smaller as they all tried to bunch in where we stood at the island. At some point, I just picked up the phone and moved it around so they all could look and or wave.

"They have invaded my home and I don't know how to get them to leave," I teased.

"You love us," Hals said.

She'd worked her way up next to me, knocking Joon to the side a little. Her eyes were trained on the phone, now propped up where it had been before.

"Hey, guys. We're all tired and decided to hang out indoors instead of going out. Jungkook and Tae are teaching me how to play Overwatch. Ken tried months ago, but said I was a lost cause."

I scoffed. "The lies you tell."

Before anything else could be said the doorbell went off, but Jin stopped me and went to go check himself. A few seconds passed and then there was a shout.

"Food's here!"

That's all it took for everyone to scramble out of the room, leaving me with Yoongi who was standing off to the side and kind of out of sight.

My stomach grumbled and I sighed. "Okay. This did not go down the path I meant it to, but whatever. I'm going to eat and then I might just post what I wanted to say on Twitter or something."

Just as my finger moved to the button that would end the live so I could say bye, it was snatched out of my hand.

"What are you doing?" I asked Yoongi.

He held up a finger to me and continued to stare into the camera. After a moment he spoke in English, taking a moment to get the right words out.

"Recently rumors about Kendall and I have happened. This is the second time and the rumors while not true would be fine, but attacking her is not. We are not dating. We are friends. And ARMY or trolls attacking her based on her race, appearance or in general are not cool. She's a great person and friend who I've grown to know over the months. We met because we are working together and our friendship grew from there. I would hate for this fun time we have creating music together to be ruined by people being rude. So stop. If you consider yourself my fan and ARMY and treat her this way then you are not my fan or a real ARMY."

Yoongi then proceeded to hand me the phone, which I almost dropped in shock of his little speech. I had not expected him to deliver the message himself, but it was nice.

After a moment of the camera facing the ground, I pulled it together and readjusted so I was looking into the camera.

"Uh... maybe I don't need to post that thing after all, but I still might." My words were slow as I was still recovering from shock.

"Come get food before someone else tries to take it," Jungkook yelled.

"So, yeah. Gotta go. Have a nice day. Bye."

With that, I ended the live and turned off my Instagram notifications, because I knew they'd be a shit show. Yoongi who was smirking simply grabbed my hand and dragged me out to the living room with the others.

#min yoongi #yoongi #suga #min suga #original character #oc #sugaxoc #yoongixoc #producer!oc #writer!oc #bts fanfic #bts fanfiction #yoongi fanfic #suga fanfic #kpop fanfic #kpop fanfiction #fanfiction #fanfic

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yukipri · 7 years ago

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Hello! I was wondering how to be successful and get followers on Patreon like you? I’ve had my Patreon for like about a couple months now and so far I don’t have any followers at all like should I give it more time or maybe improve on my art more? Also I’m sorry about asking you this I know it’s pathetic, but I’ve been trying on twitter and insta but I feel like I’m getting no where and if it feels uncomfortable or dumb to answer you don’t have to!! 😖

So I thought really hard about how to answer this, and I hope you don’t mind answering publicly because I’ve been asked similar in the past as well.

Got a bit long, so beneath a cut.

First off, please don’t think you’re pathetic. It’s hard, making art is hard, getting people to like art is harder, getting people to do anything with the art like reblog or comment is even harder, and getting people to PAY actually money is even harder than that. It’s easy to compare yourself to other creators and get frustrated, TRUST ME I do it constantly ^ ^; But since you asked me so sincerely, here’s my best attempt at giving you what I hope may be a useful answer/some insight into my own choices for how I feel about running Patreon.

Tbh, I honestly don’t think I’m the best person to answer about a “successful” Patreon as I too have had mine for less than half a year. I can hardly call it stable, and I’m constantly experimenting and adjusting things. There are also many, MANY other artists much more successful than I am, depending on what your scale is for “success” which I think really varies per person ^ ^;;;

I also feel that the way someone runs a Patreon and what it means to them (full time job, part time job, hobby, or just a donation option on the side for potential supporters) is also really important in determining what “success” is. I feel that the way I currently run my Patreon is, to be honest, not possible for anyone who has any other obligations/jobs. I usually draw an average 12-16 hours a day (balancing crash and burn comatose days with no sleep days), 7 days a week, lucky to have one day off in a month (and the times I can’t do that, like this month, I’ll provide alternative rewards). As a result I can usually churn out content daily, sometimes multiple times daily (unless the project is major). Just time investment-wise, this amount of content would not be feasible for anyone with other obligations, and it has nothing to do with skill (though pouring this much time into art hopefully means that I’m gaining some skill in the process ^ ^;)

I’ve mentioned this before when someone asked to compare Ko-Fi and Patreon, but I think for some creators, they’re treated very similarly as just a way for fans to financially support them, and Patreon is more stable and a monthly subscription, whereas Ko-Fi has less fees (at least prior to the new changes). And I think that’s a wonderful way for people to use Patreon, if that’s how they want! But I’ve also observed many creators who are FAR more famous than I am make significantly less than me, because their main content/merchandise is available elsewhere, and Patreon is just an alternative means of donation for people who want to do more. It is not uncommon at all for some Patreon creators to only post once a month or less, and sometimes, that’s enough for people to become patrons, because they’re here to support the creator, not get special content.

I personally feel that my own art/content/reputation whatever isn’t deserving of just donation support unless I’m giving back at least equivalent value in exclusive content made through solid work, heck I wouldn’t donate to myself lol. (Hence the running myself to the ground monthly whoops >.>;) To compare, while I got a bit more when I first started/was actively advertising it, nowadays I’m lucky to get one coffee through Ko-Fi every few months ^ ^; And y’know what that’s okay, I’m actually personally more comfortable giving back with Patreon, though of course my Ko-Fi is still available for donations if people feel they want to give.

I also think there’s also a difference between asking for strategies on how to get your already existing followers on public social media to become patrons, and how to increase your public fanbase consuming your free media in general. Currently, around 2% of my tumblr followers are my patrons on Patreon, which is honestly WAY WAY WAY more than I ever dreamed possible. There’s a lot out there to spend your money on, money’s tight for a lot of people, and people are used to receiving free creator content so it’s hard to convince people that of all the potential wonderful creator causes to support, YOU should be one of them. And I get it, and I’m humbled by the people who come by to my Patreon ;_;

For me, the way I try to sell myself is by creating consistent, constant, hyper-specific content. I KNOW I have a super niche fanbase, and I’m specifically targeting y’all, because that’s what I personally enjoy but also because I like offering something different. I think that even within just drawing YOI, drawing for popular ships is obviously going to appeal to a LOT more people, I KNOW this. But at the same time, a lot of other creators will be providing similar content so there’s more competition. Now, if you want Yuuri-centric multi-shipping, poly-shipping, rare pairs, constant moreTPs, A/B/O, mpreg, world-building, and OC babies all combined, there’s slightly fewer people who offer that, and I’m one of those people ^ ^;

Also, posting a significant amount of content that isn’t available publicly. For me, the big breakthrough was the NSFW. I didn’t initially mean to draw this much NSFW, but apparently people want to see it, and I enjoy drawing it (as mild as my comfort zones tend to be), and if it lures people on, maybe I can get them to enjoy my other content too ^ ^; But let’s be fully honest, the vast majority of my patrons probably joined so they could see the porn, which I’ve been very clear will never be public. And again, given how rare my ships are and how specific my AU content is, if you want to see this stuff, you’re not gonna be getting it anywhere else so come take a look–is sorta how I hope I’m selling it? ^ ^;

As for how you know when you’re ready? I again think that depends on you. I’ve had people asking me to open a Patreon since it became an option, but I didn’t think I personally was creating the type of content I’d be comfortable taking money for. I didn’t think I was ready when I was in BH6, and I didn’t think I was ready when I was in SW either. But during all of these fandoms, one thing that I WAS training myself to do was post constantly, consistently, rarely if ever taking a break, and if I didn’t post one week, it was because I was planning something major. That ramped up even more for YOI, and it was only after creating like this for years and getting to the point where I needed a form of income through art or stop pouring so much time into it that I decided to try Patreon, already having proven to myself that I can maintain creating constant content. This is for me, and again I went into it hoping to make it full time. You may not need to post as rigorously for your purposes, and that’s fine too. And maybe for you, just making your Patreon and slowly growing your fanbase from there is the right way. We’re different people and different artists so it’s completely understandable if your path is very different from mine ^ ^;

Sorry this got long and may not have provided a direct answer, but I hope it was a helpful reference in some way ^ ^;

#paperdoll-witch #YukiPri replies #Patreon

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nyaoran · 8 years ago

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I really want this year to be full of happiness and so many Yeses. I want 2017 to be the year of the Yes. I’m still determined to be optimistic but the January sads are starting to get to me and I sometimes falter a little bit. I get annoyed at myself for falling into unhelpful old habits and sometimes I feel a bit lost at times (hello existential crisis my old friend) Mostly I get fed up with the news and the state at the world at large- how can this be the best that we can manage? As a species, we are so ridiculously clever, yet somehow we let everything get into such a chaotic mess that probrably could have been avoided with better communication and organisation skills but we are now either experiencing the consequences of bad decisions or are gawping at from the sidelines like we’re witnessing some derailed traincarriage skeeter off into the abyss.

BUT ENOUGH OF THAT

There are are lots of good things that I like to think about too-

life update- I never thought I’d become that person but look at me- I BECAME THAT PERSON - I jog wllingly for fun???? I still go out on my morning runs on my days off, and although I miss my beautiful Bournemouth beach circuit, I’m getting accustomed to quaint oldfashioned York. My favourite place to jog is from my house up to the racecourse and back, The racecourse is great because it’s so calming and reminiscent of Hamstead/Richmond park in London (my fave calming places to walk!) and there are always lots cute dogs being walked there too which is always a plus. But I never thought I’d be really into running, like, I just love putting my music on and speeding down the street, like it just gives me such an endorphin high, esepecially when a good song comes on and then I’m the idiot who tries to sing along, while out of breath like a goof. Sometimes I outstretch my arms if nobody’s around and feel like I want to run into the air and fly off lol. The last time I was by the racecourse I saw that there’s going to be a 10K run in the summer. Now, I never thought I’d consider doing VOLUNTARY LONG DISTANCE RUNNING? But I guess this is who I am now haha. I’ve always liked the idea of doing some sort of sponsored athletic event but I never really thought I could do something like that or that it wasn’t something for me, but I’d like to give it a go. 10k would be a good place to start anyway, that’s around 6 miles, average time to complete is about 1 hour. The route they’ll be using is not too intimidating, I usually run for about 20 minutes at a time on a normal day so it would be just a matter of training to run a bit longer each time. Maybe it I could manage that, one day I could try something else? A half marathon? Could I? :O

Besides from running, I’m kind of considering joining some sort of sports club or class because I kind of want to meet some new people while learning a new skill and doing something fun. I’m not really sure what to go for though. There are a few things dotted around the town, but some are university affiliated and I’m not sure if I’d be eligable because I’m not a student. I’m a little terrified but I’d quite like to try a contact sport, but I’m a total wuss when it comes to that sort of thing so we’ll see how it goes. Gotta be brave!!

Music update- I….. bought a keyboard….. I’m attempting to learn how to play it……. there is indeed……. a process….. of sorts…… in the making……. yes…

Language learning update- So recently I’ve been trying to teach myself written Japanese (mainly for the reading of instagram comments and food wrappers lol) but I decided later to just go for it and try to properly learn to a confident level (and become one step closer to being a polyglot some day- one of my dreams in life!) So, I started learning basic verbal Japanese when I was younger and have the basic building blocks of the language layed down to work with, but I never really tried to learn to read, aside from the odd hiragana character here and there. But it’s been fun learning to read a language that uses a different script, like, since I’m still a newbie I get really excited when I read something in hiragana and I recognise the word being spelt out (or more often than not, I read the word and then go to translate into english and then go “Aah!” haha) So far, I’ve been teaching myself to memorise Hiragana and Katakana character using two webpages,The first [H] [K] is an introduction to each set of characters, with a handy illustrated mnemonic guide which you can use to help you with the initial memorising process (when I was learning, I used some of their examples, but came up with my own mnemomics for some of the other characters, as everyone learns in a slightly different way after all). Then, on the second site,[H][K] there’s a simple drag and drop game where you are timed to place each character next to its matching English syllable. Then, just review & repeat, revew & repeat. I keep both tabs open on my computer when I’m online and just keep going back to them in free moments, and it really works for my learning style. I’m pleased to say that after a couple of days I’m now fluent in reading Hiragana text! I haven’t done as much practice in Kana though, but I’m getting there.

Learning new languages is so interesting though. One thing I recently learned was that “Konnichiwa” is written as こんにいちは [Konnich(Ha)] although the pronounciation is still わ (wa) and that the syllable は (ha) can change to (wa) when grammatically called for.

I want to learn some basic kanji too though as it seems to be a big wall in my ability to comprehend written text (I do a lot of learning practice through reading comments on Japanese twitter & Insta, but when you can only comprehend 2/3 of the text it kind of feels like you’re reading a piece of paper wth 100 hole punches through the page) I’ve been looking around for a good place to start, but I’m not sure what’s the most useful way of starting if your goal is to get a casual grasp on written Japanese (aka I want to read Japanese twitter posts :o). I’m kind of starting with the baby stuff right now, with numbers, animals, people, basic nouns. I’m not really sure where to go from there tbh haha!

ANYWAY THAT WAS A RANT. AND NOW ITS OVER. BYEE.

#the cute animals and RAMBLING INTO THE ABYSS blog

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sheminecrafts · 6 years ago

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My product launch wishlist for Instagram, Twitter, Uber and more

‘Twas the night before Xmas, and all through the house, not a feature was stirring from the designer’s mouse . . . Not Twitter! Not Uber, Not Apple or Pinterest! On Facebook! On Snapchat! On Lyft or on Insta! . . . From the sidelines I ask you to flex your code’s might. Happy Xmas to all if you make these apps right.

Instagram

See More Like This – A button on feed posts that when tapped inserts a burst of similar posts before the timeline continues. Want to see more fashion, sunsets, selfies, food porn, pets, or Boomerangs? Instagram’s machine vision technology and metadata would gather them from people you follow and give you a dose. You shouldn’t have to work through search, hashtags, or the Explore page, nor permanently change your feed by following new accounts. Pinterest briefly had this feature (and should bring it back) but it’d work better on Insta.

Web DMs – Instagram’s messaging feature has become the defacto place for sharing memes and trash talk about people’s photos, but it’s stuck on mobile. For all the college kids and entry-level office workers out there, this would make being stuck on laptops all day much more fun. Plus, youth culture truthsayer Taylor Lorenz wants Instagram web DMs too.

Upload Quality Indicator – Try to post a Story video or Boomerang from a crummy internet connection and they turn out a blurry mess. Instagram should warn us if our signal strength is low compared to what we usually have (since some places it’s always mediocre) and either recommend we wait for Wi-Fi, or post a low-res copy that’s replaced by the high-res version when possible.

Oh, and if new VP of product Vishal Shah is listening, I’d also like Bitmoji-style avatars and a better way to discover accounts that shows a selection of their recent posts plus their bio, instead of just one post and no context in Explore which is better for discovering content.

Every feed app should steal Pinterest’s ‘more like this’ button

Twitter

DM Search – Ummm, this is pretty straightforward. It’s absurd that you can’t even search DMs by person, let alone keyword. Twitter knows messaging is a big thing on mobile right? And DMs are one of the most powerful ways to get in contact with mid-level public figures and journalists. PS: My DMs are open if you’ve got a news tip — @JoshConstine.

Unfollow Suggestions – Social networks are obsessed with getting us to follow more people, but do a terrible job of helping us clean up our feeds. With Twitter bringing back the option to see a chronological feed, we need unfollow suggestions more than ever. It should analyze who I follow but never click, fave, reply to, retweet, or even slow down to read and ask if I want to nix them. I asked for this 5 years ago and the problem has only gotten worse. Since people feel like their feeds are already overflowing, they’re stingy with following new people. That’s partly why you see accounts get only a handful of new followers when their tweets go viral and are seen by millions. I recently had a tweet with 1.7 million impressions and 18,000 Likes that drove just 11 follows. Yes I know that’s a self-own.

Analytics Benchmarks – If Twitter wants to improve conversation quality, it should teach us what works. Twitter offers analytics about each of your tweets, but not in context of your other posts. Did this drive more or fewer link clicks or follows than my typical tweet? That kind of info could guide users to create more compelling content.

Twitter Quitters And The Unfiltered Feed Problem

Facebook

(Obviously we could get into Facebook’s myriad problems here. A less sensationalized feed that doesn’t reward exaggerated claims would top my list. Hopefully its plan to downrank “borderline content” that almost violates its policies will help when it rolls out.)

Batched Notifications – Facebook sends way too many notifications. Some are downright useless and should be eliminated. “14 friends responded to events happening tomorrow”? “Someone’s fundraiser is half way to its goal?” Get that shit out of here. But there are other notifications I want to see but that aren’t urgent nor crucial to know about individually. Facebook should let us decide to batch notifications so we’d only get one of a certain type every 12 or 24 hours, or only when a certain number of similar ones are triggered. I’d love a digest of posts to my Groups or Events from the past day rather than every time someone opens their mouth.

I so don’t care

Notifications In The “Time Well Spent” Feature – Facebook tells you how many minutes you spent on it each day over the past week and on average, but my total time on Facebook matters less to me than how often it interrupts my life with push notifications. The “Your Time On Facebook” feature should show how many notifications of each type I’ve received, which ones I actually opened, and let me turn off or batch the ones I want fewer of.

Facebook is finally rolling out its ‘how long do I spend on Facebook’ dashboard

Oh, and for Will Cathcart, Facebook’s VP of apps, can I also get proper syncing so I don’t rewatch the same Stories on Instagram and Facebook, the ability to invite people to Events on mobile based on past invite lists of those I’ve hosted or attended, and the See More Like This feature I recommended for Instagram?

Uber/Lyft/Ridesharing

“Quiet Ride” Button – Sometimes you’re just not in the mood for small talk. Had a rough day, need to get work done, or want to just zone out? Ridesharing apps should offer a request for a quiet ride that if the driver accepts, you pay them an extra dollar (or get it free as a loyalty perk), and you get ferried to your destination without unnecessary conversation. I get that it’s a bit dehumanizing for the driver, but I’d bet some would happily take a little extra cash for their compliance.

“I Need More Time” Button – Sometimes you overestimate the ETA and suddenly your car is arriving before you’re ready to leave. Instead of cancelling and rebooking a few minutes later, frantically rushing so you don’t miss your window and get smacked with a no-show fee, or making the driver wait while they and the company aren’t getting paid, Uber, Lyft, and the rest should offer the “I Need More Time” button that simply rebooks you a car that’s a little further away.

Spotify/Music Streaming Apps

Scan My Collection – I wish I could just take photos of the album covers, spines, or even discs of my CD or record collection and have them instantly added to a playlist or folder. It’s kind of sad that after lifetimes of collecting physical music, most of it now sits on a shelf and we forget to play what we used to love. Music apps want more data on what we like, and it’s just sitting there gathering dust. There’s obviously some fun viral potential here too. Let me share what’s my most embarrassing CD. For me, it’s my dual copies of Limp Bizkit’s “Significant Other” because I played the first one so much it got scratched.

Friends Weekly – Spotify ditched its in-app messaging, third-party app platform, and other ways to discover music so its playlists would decide what becomes a hit in order to exert leverage over the record labels to negotiate better deals. But music discovery is inherently social and the desktop little ticker of what friends are playing on doesn’t cut it. Spotify should let me choose to recommend my new favorite song or agree to let it share what I’ve recently played most, and put those into a Discover Weekly-style social playlist of what friends are listening to.

How Spotify is finally gaining leverage over record labels

Snapchat

Growth – I’m sorry, I had to.

Bulk Export Memories – But seriously, Snapchat is shrinking. That’s worrisome because some users’ photos and videos are trapped on its Memories cloud hosting feature that’s supposed to help free up space on your phone. But there’s no bulk export option, meaning it could take hours of saving shots one at a time to your camera roll if you needed to get off of Snapchat, if for example it was shutting down, or got acquired, or you’re just bored of it.

Add-On Cameras – Snapchat’s Spectacles are actually pretty neat for recording first-person or underwater shots in a circular format. But otherwise they don’t do much more, and in some ways do much less, than your phone’s camera and are a long way from being a Magic Leap competitor. That’s why if Snapchat really wants to become a “Camera Company”, it should build sleek add-on cameras that augment our phone’s hardware. Snap previously explored selling a 360-camera but never launched one. A little Giroptic iO-style 360 lens that attaches to your phone’s charging port could let you capture a new kind of content that really makes people feel like they’re there with you. An Aukey Aura-style zoom lens attachment that easily fits in your pocket unlike a DSLR could also be a hit

Snap explored selling a 360 camera

iOS

Switch Wi-Fi/Bluetooth From Control Center – I thought the whole point of Control Center was one touch access, but I can only turn on or off the Wi-Fi and Bluetooth. It’s silly having to dig into the Settings menu to switch to a different Wi-Fi network or Bluetooth device, especially as we interact with more and more of them. Control Center should unfurl a menu of networks or devices you can choose from.

Shoot GIFs – Live Photos are a clumsy proprietary format. Instagram’s Boomerang nailed what we want out of live action GIFs and we should be able to shoot them straight from the iOS camera and export them as actual GIFs that can be used across the web. Give us some extra GIF settings and iPhones could have a new reason for teens to choose them over Androids.

Gradual Alarms – Anyone else have a heart attack whenever they hear their phone’s Alarm Clock ringtone? I know I do because I leave my alarms on so loud that I’ll never miss them, but end up being rudely shocked awake. A setting that gradually increases the volume of the iOS Alarm Clock every 15 seconds or minute so I can be gently arisen unless I refuse to get up.

Maybe some of these apply to Android, but I wouldn’t know because I’m a filthy casual iPhoner. Send me your Android suggestions, as well as what else you want to see added to your favorite apps.

[Image Credit: Hanson Inc]

from iraidajzsmmwtv http://bit.ly/2AcFp4w via IFTTT

#IFTTT #iraidajzsmmwtv

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technicalsolutions88 · 6 years ago

Link

Instagram

Every feed app should steal Pinterest’s ‘more like this’ button

Twitter

Twitter Quitters And The Unfiltered Feed Problem

Facebook

I so don’t care

Facebook is finally rolling out its ‘how long do I spend on Facebook’ dashboard

Uber/Lyft/Ridesharing

Spotify/Music Streaming Apps

How Spotify is finally gaining leverage over record labels

Snapchat

Growth – I’m sorry, I had to.

Snap explored selling a 360 camera

iOS

Maybe some of these apply to Android, but I wouldn’t know because I’m a filthy casual iPhoner. Send me your Android suggestions, as well as what else you want to see added to your favorite apps.

[Image Credit: Hanson Inc]

from Mobile – TechCrunch https://tcrn.ch/2ELMwDV ORIGINAL CONTENT FROM: https://techcrunch.com/

#Technical Solutions #SEO #Online Earning #Youtube Marketing #Android Developer

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theinvinciblenoob · 6 years ago

Link

Instagram

Every feed app should steal Pinterest’s ‘more like this’ button

Twitter

Twitter Quitters And The Unfiltered Feed Problem

Facebook

I so don’t care

Facebook is finally rolling out its ‘how long do I spend on Facebook’ dashboard

Uber/Lyft/Ridesharing

Spotify/Music Streaming Apps

How Spotify is finally gaining leverage over record labels

Snapchat

Growth – I’m sorry, I had to.

Snap explored selling a 360 camera

iOS

Maybe some of these apply to Android, but I wouldn’t know because I’m a filthy casual iPhoner. Send me your Android suggestions, as well as what else you want to see added to your favorite apps.

[Image Credit: Hanson Inc]

via TechCrunch

#IFTTT #TechCrunch

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fmservers · 6 years ago

Text

My product launch wishlist for Instagram, Twitter, Uber and more

Instagram

Every feed app should steal Pinterest’s ‘more like this’ button

Twitter

Twitter Quitters And The Unfiltered Feed Problem

Facebook

I so don’t care

Facebook is finally rolling out its ‘how long do I spend on Facebook’ dashboard

Uber/Lyft/Ridesharing

Spotify/Music Streaming Apps

How Spotify is finally gaining leverage over record labels

Snapchat

Growth – I’m sorry, I had to.

Snap explored selling a 360 camera

iOS

Maybe some of these apply to Android, but I wouldn’t know because I’m a filthy casual iPhoner. Send me your Android suggestions, as well as what else you want to see added to your favorite apps.

[Image Credit: Hanson Inc]

Via Josh Constine https://techcrunch.com

#TechCrunch

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williamsjoan · 6 years ago

Text

My product launch wishlist for Instagram, Twitter, Uber and more

Instagram

Every feed app should steal Pinterest’s ‘more like this’ button

Twitter

Twitter Quitters And The Unfiltered Feed Problem

Facebook

I so don’t care

Facebook is finally rolling out its ‘how long do I spend on Facebook’ dashboard

Uber/Lyft/Ridesharing

Spotify/Music Streaming Apps

How Spotify is finally gaining leverage over record labels

Snapchat

Growth – I’m sorry, I had to.

Snap explored selling a 360 camera

iOS

Maybe some of these apply to Android, but I wouldn’t know because I’m a filthy casual iPhoner. Send me your Android suggestions, as well as what else you want to see added to your favorite apps.

[Image Credit: Hanson Inc]

My product launch wishlist for Instagram, Twitter, Uber and more published first on https://timloewe.tumblr.com/

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readersforum · 6 years ago

Text

My product launch wishlist for Instagram, Twitter, Uber and more

New Post has been published on http://www.readersforum.tk/my-product-launch-wishlist-for-instagram-twitter-uber-and-more/

My product launch wishlist for Instagram, Twitter, Uber and more

Instagram

Every feed app should steal Pinterest’s ‘more like this’ button

Twitter

Twitter Quitters And The Unfiltered Feed Problem

Facebook

I so don’t care

Facebook is finally rolling out its ‘how long do I spend on Facebook’ dashboard

Uber/Lyft/Ridesharing

Spotify/Music Streaming Apps

How Spotify is finally gaining leverage over record labels

Snapchat

Growth – I’m sorry, I had to.

Snap explored selling a 360 camera

iOS

Maybe some of these apply to Android, but I wouldn’t know because I’m a filthy casual iPhoner. Send me your Android suggestions, as well as what else you want to see added to your favorite apps.

[Image Credit: Hanson Inc]

0 notes

argotmagazine-blog · 6 years ago

Text

Dear Worrier Princess: Exes, Exes Everywhere

Dear Worrier Princess is a queer advice column based off The Ex-Girlfriend of My Ex-Girlfriend Is My Girlfriend, the viral queer advice zine by Maddy Court (a.k.a @xenaworrierprincess on Instagram).

In her inaugural column for Argot, Maddy considers heartbreak and queer love in the age of Instagram. How do you find closure and space when your ex is constantly popping up on your feed? What does it mean to emotionally block someone? Why are queer women so determined to stay friends, and how does this cultural tic translate to the internet?

Queery #1: I went through this really brutal breakup a little over a year ago (my first love cheated on me and dumped me in a phone call from her new girl’s apartment). This was really rough on my psyche and I spent a lot of time dwelling on her/insta-stalking her/going to therapy about her. I thought all of that would end when I got a new girlfriend, but I am now several months into a new relationship (with someone I LOVE who is WONDERFUL TO ME) and I still catch myself thinking about my ex and checking up on her social media. I don’t want her back, but I crave her approval and her interest so much and I don’t know how to turn it off and move on! Help!

Heartbreak in the age of Instagram is unreasonably cruel. The human brain can barely distinguish between cold and wet sensations. It can’t register the coolest kinds of light, or maintain relationships with more than 200 people at once. It’s not equipped to process that the woman who broke your heart via a phone call from her new girl’s apartment is creating a multimedia, real-time documentary about her life and it’s available 24/7, for free, from literally anywhere. In 1990 or whatever, people divvied up their CDs and lost touch. They ripped up photographs. The sad and brokenhearted could scab over, forget the sound of their ex’s laugh, buy some chunky necklaces and move on. Today, physical space isn’t enough to heal from a break-up. You must unlearn the muscle memory and masochism that compels you to check your ex’s social media. On top of that, you’re contending with algorithms that track your every click and position your ex-girlfriend at the top of your feed. You cannot rip up your ex’s Instagram.

There’s also the fact that queer communities are insular, online and off. Queer women, especially, place a huge premium on staying friends, on keeping some semblance of solidarity and peace throughout a breakup. Use this to your advantage. When you feel rejected or overlooked, throwing your own party is a powerful experience. Flood your Instagram with golden hour selfies, nature shots of you hiking with a three-legged rescue dog, and artfully arranged photobooth print-outs that scream, I HAVE SO MANY HOT ZANY FRIENDS AND THEY ALL WANNA BE CLOSE TO ME IN THIS TINY SPACE. By projecting that you don’t care about your ex, you might tap into some genuine, unburdened energy.

Like Doritos for dinner, checking your ex-girlfriend’s Instagram is instant gratification. Try leaving your phone at home. You can start small: a bike ride, trip to the grocery store, or dinner with friends. Pay attention to when you feel the urge to open Instagram. What’s your emotional state? Is it when you’re bored and waiting in line? Is it when you’re alone and is seems that everyone except you showed up to the park with a picnic blanket of friends? Maybe you’ll find that you feel neutral, and checking her Instagram is just an old habit.

I know this is all very mindfulness-from-a-can. It really works though, I promise. Also, stash your phone across the room when you go to bed. This helps avoid late night/early morning Instagram sinkholes. Make a tally every time you go 6 hours without looking at her stuff and see how long you last.

The obvious solution is to just block her, but blocking is political and invites confrontation. There are too many workarounds. Instead, re-think blocking as a ritual. Using a pen and paper, make a list of all the times your ex-girlfriend was crass and thoughtless with your heart. What red flags, boundaries, and lessons did she teach you? If you’d never loved her, would you appreciate your current girlfriend in the same way? Put the list in a safe place in case you need to re-visit it. Then, wash all your bedding in hot water and wipe down your floors with vinegar. Center yourself and set an intention to disconnect emotionally from your ex-girlfriend. Her approval is worthless to you. Her likes and comments roll off of you like water off a duck’s back. Her Instagram is just another entity floating around, it no longer drains your emotional energy. She is emotionally blocked. This won’t happen overnight. It takes time. But it will get easier.

Queery #2: My ex is a prominent member of my local queer scene and has a public presence across various arts practices. It annoys me that I see them all the time on social media - their own and others' - being both social and promoting their projects. It also annoys me that I am likely to run into them at any given event that I go to, especially because they are a social butterfly and I am an awkward shy girl liable to freeze at any given moment. Please offer your soundest advice for dealing with famous exes.

When I meet someone new, I describe her hair to my friends. I notice the shirts she wears and try to discern which one is her favorite. I worry the entree I ordered was boring, the story I told was boring, my apartment was boring. I am a seagull pecking old bread and she is an actual star. But my girlfriends are most famous in that shady, painful patch when they’re becoming exes. I drift through Anthropologie, picking up candles and smelling them and sighing and putting them back. I call my friends at midnight. I dread running into her, but I also want to run into her. Why? Because every ex is a famous ex.

It’s been said before, but it bears repeating: breakups would be much easier if your ex disappeared. But they don’t. They shop at the Target by your house. They post longform Instagram stories. They show up at your best friend’s barbecue with sweet corn. They’re here, they’re queer, they’re 100% going to the art show this weekend. All you can do is enlist friends to act as buffers and practice polite conversation-enders like “it was nice seeing you” or “I’m going to go look at the art now.”

There’s also the matter that your ex is famous. I’d be worried if your letter contained lingering admiration. I’m sensing that you no longer subscribe to your ex’s queer celebrity mystique and that’s healthy. You understand that having a big social media presence is a job, not a status. Like being a cruise director or a theatre person, it’s a skill-set that usually aligns with an extroverted personality. The next time you see your ex spilling across your feed, remind yourself that what you’re seeing is deliberate and a little fabricated.

I’m going to end my response with some validation: the annoyance you feel is understandable—your ex approaches their life in a way that clashes and brushes up against your own. This doesn’t mean there’s anything wrong with your ex, you’re just [essential] oil and water. Emotionally block them (see Queery 1 for a definition and instructions). Don’t wait. Call today.

Are you in a pickle regarding your love life? Do you have a crush you can't figure out how to talk to, an ex you'd like to reconnect with but don't know if it's appropriate or the right time?

Shoot an email to [email protected] or fill out the form below.

Maddy Court is an artist and writer based in Madison, WI. Keep up with her on Twitter @worrierprincess, or on instagram @xenaworrierprincess.

#dear worrier princess #advice column #sidney champagne #maddy court #Maddy Court

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joyfullyimportantyouth-blog · 7 years ago

Text

Tell me a story: Yoga Abroad

It had been a long day since the Argentinian had MIA-ed into the sunset, leaving me groping for serenity that very long Wednesday before yoga teacher training was to begin. "Allo!" The hostel owner who everyone called "Daddy" chimed as I shuffled from my porch to my moped. Damn. I wanted something herbed to counterbalance my lunch of nerves and tempeh and air. Ten more minutes till I was expected to be at the Shala for what would be either a savasana cocktail of celebrity rehab or an om orgasm with taut Nordic goddesses who probably moonlighted as amber-infused Bhagavagita sexologists. I was gonna take my gamble and go find out after shelling out the skrilla G's in a moment of BLANKKKKK upheaval one hungover morning in Bangkok just two weeks prior. Time to smatter my Traggae Surf hostel wall with Giselle Bunchden and "Touch Yourself, Ganesh Offspring" quotes.

I decided to walk and observe everything to get into the practice of being "authentically mindful." It took me 3 times of listening to Yo Gotti's "Act Right" before I reached the tranquil wood sign of "Yoga Searcher, Uluwatu, Bali." There was a happy Buddha emblazoned on the coinage that I had arrived to find myself. Skeptical, a little. Facetious, no… it just dawned on me and probably a million times before that I could be the anti-christ to these types of programs. I'd always simultaneously cringed and fawned over the "yoga gurl" pics insta kept on titillating rotation: yoga gurl stretching into some fantastical bridge position, her bronzed bod entwined with an inspirational quote of having "found inner peace" in Peru. "Yoga gurl" sipping out of a chlorophyll coconut like it was the most delicious double-shot of patron that she'd ever guzzled. "Yoga gurl" beaming at her dreaded washboard abs surfer boyfriend, congratulating her graduation with matching sun and moon tattoos and the coordinates of where they'd once met at a surfer ashram.

Why was I here? Did I want to be yoga gurl? Textbook guilty. It was time to reinvent after spending far too much time withdrawn into a shell of "the post-grad life." I could've just bought a $30 insurance covered therapy session a few times a week with a frumpily dressed yet moderately compassionate shrink but nooooo, no no no... I had to go to BALI to talk about problems and laugh with nonchalance when I realized that my hair salty and my toes so tanned meant the world was so fine now, so fine. I could envision my previous selves clustering together to meet about this cosmic life transition, sharing kombucha while wondering where the wine and whiskey was hidden, rumpling a NYTimes paper to a Jay Z banger, reflecting then brushing off the meanderings with "oh, please, let's just say fuck it and do it. It'll be a great story." Indeed. I wandered up to the Shala, the grass seeming to emanate inner peace itself as it swayed by the infinity pool, inviting the gorgeous participants to "let that shit go." Beautiful women in flowing bohemian glory wandered up the steps, not breaking a sweat in the 90 degree sun, their smiles like sumptuous macca whirling in a sea of boison berries. "Welcome," one of our instructors, Amy, greeted us. I loved her immediately. Her hair was a fiery crown of auburn and she had a septum and her voice was as soothing as dark chocolate dashed in Jameson; when she said "gra" in her Irish lilt I wondered why Hozier hadn't married her already.

We all settled into our crimson pillows and were told to interview a partner so we could learn, embrace, introduce, get to know each other. My partner, Rebecca, was a holistic wunderkind platonic supermodel with a dash of sass who I assumed could do the splits with the conviction of the Dalai Lama's blessing. When it came time to go around the circle, she read my answers as I challenged myself to unravel from a painful expression of half-lotus that I could definitely not do: "Isabelle loves the color black, Bobby Shmurda club bangerz, painting, reading. She is currently traveling on her own for three months and has no expectations of what her experience will be here. She just wants to learn how to breathe and connect with parts of herself that she feels like she has lost." Goddamn, I wanted to cry for myself. Thank god everyone going around the circle wasn't set on this teacher track, they just wanted some expensive therapy with prayer beads and Shiva and all that. There would undoubtedly be the Eat Pray Lover who had found her moksha in India and in her rose-smelling coitus, but om mani padmi om to her.

I had always loved yoga, but like with everything else, I tended to conceptualize the whole experience into a tangent web of intellectualized thoughts and associations. Or inappropriate metaphors. I loved the feeling of the actual exercise, but all of this head business made it so that it was an experience outside of me usually; the spirituality had not yet caught me, although that was why I was precisely in Bali at the golden temple shala at that very moment. I wanted a jolt and so I was going to throw caution to the wind with a degree of control based on the internet's blessing of great reviews of women who were trying to do the same thing as me at yoga retreats and teacher trainings abroad. I'd felt like I'd been unraveling for a bit already, so decluttering some of the mess seemed beyond essential and spiritual tourism was what I thought would be quite the graceful quick fix.

The next few weeks turned into an amalgamation of self-discovery and trying to do certain asana positions and also some penetrating flares of frustration but also laughter at the absurdity of some "unfoldings." Every morning started at 5:30 am in the shala, which meant rolling out of bed and spraying myself with delicious DEET at 5:10 AM before sauntering out the door to walk with my neighborhood bombshells, Greta (from Wisconsin) and Becks (from Norway). Thankfully, Becks and I would sprint back to "Daddy" come 7:30 AM to guzzle buttloads of delish Balinese coffee while commiserating about how our hips couldn't open and yet how we loved Dipa's lectures on the feminine and the masculine merged into perception within the concept of the 8 folds of yoga. After this ritual I would usually blare Schoolboy Q and practice twrking (always come prepared) for a solid 40 minutes before going back to the shala for some alignment where I prayed that we would have partner massage sessions that would make my celibate self feel some firing synapses.

I found some soul sistahs in my atypical American peers. Erin and I found each other at the next door warung when she explained how she wanted some body bounce and less namestes. She became #1 woe. She is the baddest bitch of them all, especially when we listened to E-40 by the pool and she claimed in-person basis with the bay's pride and glory. And she worked at Twitter and claimed a title in an Aussie wet t-shirt contest and has traveled the whole world and is an acclaimed blogger. And would do neck shots of tequila with me. We became each other's co-dependent trap queens at the local Single Fin club. Thank god I wasn't in love while I was incorporating into this yogini program. Instead I meditated on everything I was looking for and why I was alone and why I was so ecstatic to be single (until 10 pm). It was like a study abroad for starving yourself on green juice and breathing and all I had to do was make decisions for me. My agenda was to get everything out of my system, although that comes at a cost: because then you actually discover yourself. And that can be... hard. But necessary. I realized I was a whole person and so was everyone else no matter what point in life they were at. Basically, yoga teacher training is like a caftan clad sorority who hold a cave open for worshipping Jack Johnson and period moon goddess parties. The worst part was feeling simultaneously annoyed and a little crestfallen that I couldn't cry post-meditation while others sobbed about varying levels of tragedy and spontaneous emotion. It was as if a little Eagle perched on my soul and clawed at any inkling of a tear. I cried when the nutritionist talked about how her old friends who drank cheap wine and smoked cigs didn't accept her newfound love affair with kale and B12 shots. Figures.

On a lighter note, I would check my Tinder abroad after an arduous day of leg flexing. Here is what I found that led me to keep doing downward dog to soul search and not find men.

Not too savory. But I would often wash away the unsightlyness of it all with a good ol' gin and tonic with the American girls, especially after getting our yoga certificates in our crocheted crop tops. One interesting note: Americans cannot accept awards without looking like complete douche bags. We all joked about it afterwards that the four of us couldn't make heartfelt speeches like the fellow Europeans did. We just collect those trophies like candies, stating after the acceptance, "yeah, thanks guys, love you" as a token of our appreciation. Point of relation, apparently.

The whole yoga experience has made wonder what acceptance is other than just where you are right now. It's also made me curious as to how it is apart of the woman I hope to be or already am. I mostly feel humbled and grateful for the women I got to know for a solid month straight x 1000 hypothetical days of deep talks. And for the times that I wondered about who I was; well, that will continue, and so will the sideways splits of discovering bad-assness that yoga training taps you into. I was gonna write a blog on travel tips and then I ended up writing a blog on inappropriate metaphors. Because that's just me.

#yogaeverydamnday #balilife #tinder #millenials #backpackingseasia

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technicalsolutions88 · 6 years ago

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Instagram

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Twitter

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Facebook

I so don’t care

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Uber/Lyft/Ridesharing

Spotify/Music Streaming Apps

How Spotify is finally gaining leverage over record labels

Snapchat

Growth – I’m sorry, I had to.

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iOS

Maybe some of these apply to Android, but I wouldn’t know because I’m a filthy casual iPhoner. Send me your Android suggestions, as well as what else you want to see added to your favorite apps.

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