#urgetosubmerge

[sillyprincetimetravel]

Aight, so the whole reason I spontaneously decided to make a Tumblr and start blogging anonymously is because I lowkey think I'm starting to go insane.

And no one can know.

Except the internet.

And strangers...

Can someone in the neurospicy devision of humanity please tell me why after a full day of crippling executive dysfunction- a solid 15 hours of doom scrolling and staring at the walls with such intensity you would think I was paying them to strip for me- I now, in the dead of night, have the most visceral urge to throw myself, full body, into a freezing lake.

Now, I don't live in an apartment with a bathtub. I'm stuck with a creaky stand up shower. So the #urgetosubmerge as I'm calling it, can't be fulfilled by taking a quick dunk, and standing in the Daffy Duck spittle of a shower doesn't seem to quell my urge.

I'm not looking for professional help here, but if anyone has a name for this... if anyone knows what it is... if it's not a justme thing... please help me understand what's going on.

And yes, for clarification, I literally am YEARNING to drive to a lake, strip naked, and jump into the subzero waters. I don't know why, but I'm actually fighting myself not to go do it right now.

Mainly because I'll have to deal with th consequences afterwards.

TDLR: After a long day of being frozen by mental health, my body is aching to jump into a lake and I must know why.