#update: How fuck. you ok france?

[portuguesedisaster]

De toda a extrema direita que podia sair vencedora, antes o Cotrim de Figueiredo

[rafesslxt]

𝐔𝐏𝐂𝐎𝐌𝐈𝐍𝐆 𝐒𝐓𝐎𝐑𝐘𝐒 🪻🪷 🖋️

this will be where u can see how far I am with writings and what‘s up next on my plan for Harry Potter Characters. I also have a Hayden Christensen and Rafe Cameron one

some of my story‘s that are a more of a unique idea of mine, i won‘t share so it can‘t be stolen before I post it ☁️🧸

a status like 'not started' or 'barely started' don't mean it will take long. Most of the times I write a story in one or two sessions

current nr. of drafts: 44 ⎥smut: 🌶 fluff: ☁️ funny: ☀️

updated: 22 / July / 2024

Yule Ball ⎥m. riddle⎥☁️⎥status: almost finished 「 ✦ Mattheo and Tom want to take reader to the yule ball ✦ 」

Yule Ball ⎥t. nott⎥☁️⎥status: almost finished 「 ✦ Theo goes out of his way to ask you to be his date for the yule ball ✦ 」

Brother's best friend⎥m. riddle⎥🌶☁️☀️⎥status: at the beginning 「 ✦ This is a unique idea so I won't share hehe ✦ 」

Undercover⎥m. riddle⎥🌶☁️⎥status: half finished 「 ✦ This is a unique idea so I won't share hehe ✦ 」

reading⎥m. riddle⎥☁️☀️⎥status: not started 「 ✦ Mattheo finds out what kind of books you read in your free time✦ 」

Animagus���m. riddle⎥☁️☀️⎥status: barely started 「 ✦ you show Mattheo your Animagus form and he freaks out a little ✦ 」

Notice me⎥m. riddle x potter!sister⎥☁️☀️🌶⎥barely started 「 ✦ Harry try's everything to stop Mattheo from getting near to you✦ 」

Dear diary⎥m. riddle⎥☁️⎥half finished 「 ✦ This is a unique idea so I won't share hehe ✦ 」

Oh, Professor⎥professor! m. riddle⎥🌶⎥barely started 「 ✦ mmh let's just say it get's interesting✦ 」

Whirlpool⎥m. riddle⎥☁️🌶⎥barely started 「 ✦ It's your birthday and you throw a party✦ 」

Friends⎥m. riddle x malfoy! reader x t.nott⎥☁️🌧⎥status: not started 「 ✦ This is a unique idea so I won't share hehe ✦ 」

secret admirer⎥m. riddle⎥☁️⎥status: barely started 「 ✦ who wrote you all those letters?✦ 」

Brat⎥m. riddle x reader x t. nott⎥🌶⎥status: almost half finished 「 ✦ threesome hehe ✦ 」

Temptation⎥m. riddle⎥🌶⎥status: barely started 「 ✦ a little spicy bet between mattheo and his girlfriend y/n ✦ 」

Haunted⎥m. riddle⎥🌶☁️⎥status: barely started 「 ✦ this was requested - mattheo, reader and friends go through a haunted house ✦ 」

NSFW Heascanons⎥t. nott⎥🌶⎥status: almost finished

Smokin'⎥m. riddle⎥🌶⎥status: not started 「 ✦ this was requested - will be posted soon ✦ 」

Greedy ⎥mattheo, enzo & theo x reader⎥🌶⎥status: almost finished 「 ✦ you and your best friend talk about the famous slytherin boys, not knowing one of them is listening and now planning with his friends to make your theirs ✦ 」

Not her⎥m. riddle⎥☁️🌧⎥status: not started

Studio⎥Slytherin Boys⎥☁️⎥status: not started

arcānum | mattheo riddle | ☁️ | status: not started 「 ✦ Mattheo becomes obsessed with reader in a portrait in the halls of hogwarts. Soon enough he runs with the time to free you from your curse ✦ 」

pool date ⎥t. nott⎥🌶⎥status: half finished

happy birthday ⎥m. riddle⎥☁️⎥not started 「 ✦ the boys planned something special for your birthday and take you on a trip to france ✦ 」

Several Parts Story's:

Showerhead 3⎥m. riddle⎥🌶☁️⎥status: barely started [I'm sorry ok 💀😭] 「 ✦ are they really just fucking? or is it more? ✦ 」 here are Part 1 and Part 2

Lustpotion 2⎥m. riddle⎥🌶⎥status: barely started 「 ✦ oh how the tables have turned when Mattheo is the one who drinks the potion y/n made this time✦ 」 If you wanna read Part 1

[laulo821]

do you have thoughts on hersheys/american chocolate

to be frank i don't know what "american chocolate" reeeaaally means. like. do kitkats and mars and twix and stuff count? they're not chocolate per se, more like chocolate fingers. but if those are included, yea all that shablang is good but arguably more for the filling than for the chocolate itself (but since they're so common maybe they're france/europe-made and if so they definitely taste differently than real usamerican ones)

also i am not the best one to answer this kind of question cuz i have a very low sugar tolerance, i'm not a chocolate bar addict and i'm not a snacker in general at all. so yknow!! maybe biased answer!!

now to the taste test.

i have gone to three different superstores, a sweets-specialised store and a usamerican-specialised store and this is the only type of hershey's i could find so very limited choice here (arguably since it's not a plain chocolate i'd argue the test is null and void but let's carry on regardless)

(+ reese's cup cuz it's very usamerican, it's not very common and i never had one before. although it belongs to the chocolate finger kind of sweets)

the reese's cup is genuinely a horrible, awful snack. i'll be completely honest and had "mini reese's cups" before this test (i'm writing this live btw) and i was very close to just spit it all out because of how disgusting it was to me. and it happened again with the big ones lmao, albeit they were more balanced. by the second cup it's a bit enjoyable but it's really not . good. milk chocolate + peanut butter is Not It (never had peanut butter before so maybe it's solely because of the pb). plus it's sooooo sugary. i'm not gonna sleep tonight after this. i feel like i drank a cup of monster energy drink but there's no caffeine so it's not even worth it

now the hershey's – i took a square of black chocolate for cooking before hand to remember the taste of my usual chocolate (i don't like black chocolate but still. For Reference i had to). soooo. it's good. i like milk chocolate so it's very nice and the crunchy of the biscuit is cool, i like crunchy things. the milk chocolate feels very similar to the white chocolate i'm used to, albeit more sugary maybe. hard to tell with the biscuit. taste wise it's good. however the squares are very little (height-wise) compared to my usual chocolate bars so it's very unsatisfying hunger-wise, a feeling which i don't have AT ALL with my usual chocolate bars (4 squares and i'm usually "ok that's enough chocolate") so i understand better how you can just eat that stuff up until your cupboard is empty

so anyways. that's my review for that particular type of hershey's lmao. would eat again. i'd rather buy a snickers instead though. if i ever encounter regular hershey's i'll do an update i guess. but the reese's cups can fuck right off

[dullahandyke]

Ok hi I'm back playing dgs for the second half of the first trial

I meant to say before but I rlly enjoy how pivotal the setting is to this trial!! Obvi they didnt jusr pick it for shits and giggles but I'm liking the tension that the British presence provides

Also seeing susato so quiet in all these opening bits is so strange... susato toss :(?

AW YEAH ASOUGI GRABBING HIS SWORD W SAMURAI ON A MISSION PLAYING !!!! love this guy hope nothing bad ever happens to him

Love how auchi is trying to guilt ryuu over anglo-japanese relations and asougis just like lollllll fuck em... anti-british king

YESSS RYUU YOU GET HIM TOO!!! Fuck the government <3

NOOOO I JUST LOST A BUNCH OF LIVEBLOG BCOS MY PHONE GUCKED UP... anyway I'm up to the handbag thing

God they really pull out the 2-4 despair sprite any opportunity they can huh

'Asougis dream of going to Britain is fucked if we lose this' bro I thought itd b fine as long as he wasnt the lawyer. Was all that shit for nothjng

Yesss ryuu objecting just before the verdict... love him

Love ryuus little thinking face... + his hand guard thing... hes so the thinker

Love how as the trial progresses ryuu gets more sprites .. hes hardly even bug eyed anymore

Boooo brett we hate youuu why'd you even study in Japan if you're just gonna b racist abt every part of it

Also tbh idk where we're going with this train of thinking but its fun

My God is it poison and she kristoph gavins her way into a conviction... kristoph gavinning is when u make glib comments about details of a case that lead to your conviction btw

'I'm sure you've noticed this student doesnt miss much' asougi is showing off ryuus talents like a little pony thay can do a canter and tbh awesime

Help me one of her rebuttals is 'your flys been down this whole time' ❓❓❓ ryuu..... 'why didnt you tell me asougi' why do YOU assume asougis looking at your dick ryuu. 🤨

Shes pulling out the 'your brains are smaller than Europeans' shit my God.... can we like kill her kill her

Ok I think Brett poisoned Wilson and then stole the glass to cover her tracks before shooting him to pin ryuu... we r gonna update her autopsy report

No hang on wait that's such a stupid fucking plan. What if hosonaga noticed Wilson was dead. What if ryuu DIDNT notice the gun. If Wilson's wrist was burned on the plate then surely it was set in front of him but part of the beef is eaten so Brett must have had some. I guess thatd probably be better for alibi shit by having it look like h3 was in the middle of eating when shot instead of before being served but like. Was she leaning over the table stretching w a knife and fork to cut off a bit of steak. Girls gotta eat ig

Love that theres an exchange where ryuu goes 'this is great auchi agrees that the police r fucked' and asougi goes 'no ryuu hes clout chasing to impress a European woman. Hes just like bisexual obama'

Asougi picking up his sword as he prepares to 'pursue' hosonaga's statement... asougi r u going to kill this man

Hosonaga that is illegal

'What does this French writing say asougi' 'idk go to France and ask' hes such a bit of a bitch I love it <3

Also I'm looking at the back of hosonaga's pants when it does the panning shot and why r they so baggy at the ankles... bro hes tall as shit does he shop at the slenderman store

SUSATOOOOOOOOO SUSATO IS HERE@!!!! AW YISS LETS GO

Oh my God another fucking to be continued? I thought this was the last part bro enenensjs so I'm gonna take a break for a bit and then go back to killing jezaille brett dead

[calypso-finale]

Ninety Nine.

The way I have been back and forth to France, I am busy and now I get how my mother felt, but with me it’s close enough for me to get back for Aziel and I can be with him, so I think London being my home was the best idea to me. Aziel gets my time, and this is what I wanted, I did not want him to be left out, I didn’t want Aziel to suffer because of me working which he isn’t, he has a perfect schedule. But I have left him with Grace since his father is in France still, he has been in France ever since, I actually don’t know but he has been away for a while promoting his music, so he is busy himself, but I try and get back for him a lot of the times but this time I am staying over because I have the Dior thing going on. Grace has come in handy, I dropped him off and jumped on a jet here. Halle bless her heart, she took a career break to be with me, and I was shocked she said that “I can get used to this life I can’t lie” she said as she sipped the champagne “it’s not even nine you know, it’s morning still” she is drinking already “one little glass please but the fact I have been on a jet more times then I have fingers, I am shook to the core. My passport is running out of pages, I am loving life, but you know when I got home I said to Colin thank you, for being understanding. He said oh it’s ok you know, you want to be there for our friend, even though you never asked. I think, well I hope I am a help” I chuckled “of course you are, you give me strength. The meetings, just to have you there with me, I feel confident and you being here has given me that, I am happy you are here Halle, and I can’t thank you enough. Lillian I appreciate her too, the boys. Like you all care for me like we family, and we are family, but you didn’t have too” Halle shook her head “to know what you went through, I mean ok we tried but it’s going to affect you, like being alone and doing this? I was like I can take year out and be with you, no string attached. But Lillian said” she cackled “she said I am missing the fucking gossip; I am sick. But when we go back, we need to update her like she wants to know. So fuck that, how are you feeling. Photoshoot and then the whole runway thing with him” I blew out air “I am not nervous, like I am up for it. It’s in the back of my mind and always will be but I am excited, I can’t wait to get out there, but I think Oakley is mad with me about it, he calls and is like Aziel there” I sniggered “oh” Halle said, “oh my god, you know what when you said I have something to tell him, was it that?” nodding my head “oh” her eyes bulged out “oh girl, I never said it to you because like obviously we been here and there and everywhere so fuck” now I am scared “bitch what happened?” I am so confused.

She shushed me “just please don’t mention it to him but anyways we was at the food place, and I was like fuck it, I am going to ask him. I said how you feel after the whole Rylee thing. Oh bro, he was like it is what it is I guess but she could have done it differently, she could have said wait for me and let me heal but she is being a better person for some next man, and I don’t rate that, but whatever I guess. I love her, ain’t fake shit but the way she did it I ain’t like it. Then he snapped because I said bro you taking it the wrong way, because you have nobody so what the fuck. He goes you ain’t see the videos, you ain’t see it. I did, that shit engraved in my head. I am like is this guy real, because you literally fucking wide open, so we had that, but made up then you said that, oh shit” she laughed, I stared at Halle “really?” I am shocked “fucking really, girl. He was really hurt by it, like why she trying to be better for another man, so like I wasn’t worth it for her” covering my face shaking my head “oh my god” I said “I know, I fucking thought the same, like Oakley you not getting the picture, but he is slow. Men are fucking slow, London men at that are slow sister so this is no shock to me” I am shocked “so he didn’t like I said that, I literally told him I have no other man, like this is it for me so why is he acting like I am doing this for another man?” I said “because men, that is it. Colin and Diji would fucking do the same, he just sees you doing better for another man, guy is acting injured” I groaned out “so that is why he is being weird, no wonder but now I know. I can’t say anything” I scoffed “he is butt hurt for nothing, I wasn’t being good for him, so goofy wanted me to be a nut job?” Halle kissed her teeth “leave him, let him realise. Let him do it, these men are dumb” she waved me off, I am just shocked that this happened with him.

My mind is still stuck on what happened with Halle and Oakley, is he that stupid and did he really take it that bad and why, I never meant it in that sense. I am not even looking for another either “I don’t drink, my friend will have that, but can I have water please?” I said to the assistant “of course” she bowed out “I am about to be drunk?” Halle froze staring at me “can’t be rude now” I laughed “no you’re right, we can’t waste” I am going to be the sensible friend now that doesn’t drink. I prefer it this way anyways “these dresses are nice; I am loving them. You think a bitch could get some free ones” I shrugged “possibly, I will find out for you” I grinned “oh clink clink bitch, but I need to get for Lillian too, she is hating me too much” she kissed her teeth “Rylee” the assistant came back in “rapper and now model Digga” oh he is here “aw shit” he said laughing “hi” I smiled “ladies, I am Digga, let’s be formal” he got his hand out, shaking his hand “we don’t hug now?” he said “my legs hurt” I said lying “oh yeah” he laughed “I know you” he pointed “of course you do, who doesn’t know me Diggles” Halle said and he busted out laughing “oh man, this is crazy” he sat down “what is your real name?” I don’t like his rap name “ask your man, he knows” oh he is annoying “oh wait, no sorry. You both aren’t together. Rhys, Rhys Herbert” I laughed out “my uncle is called Herbert too” he let out an oh “I was about to say, you laughing at my name now but Rylee and Rhys sounds peng though, I mean let’s be real. Rylee and Rhys” he clapped his hands smiling “beautiful” I sighed out “how is big Oaks, he good? I peeped his friend Wadz, they been running from my fade, but I have changed, closer to god now” oh this man is annoying “they both ok” he smiled “I ain’t seen man in West, did he erm” he pointed “moved out of west because it’s a bad place in court, oh yeah, yeah he did. Man rather kill himself then catch a fade from me” he laughed “that isn’t funny nigga, we ain’t laughing so shut the fuck” Halle said “I am sorry, I apologise. My bad” he said, that was a nasty thing to say, and I get why Oakley and him didn’t get on.

Halle is sticking by me so close, me and this guy having to be with each other all day is going to kill me because he just talks just to talk and at this point “has big man Oaks ever tell you about his school life? You know what we could have been friends but it’s his fault” looking over at him “he has told me stuff but yeah” I don’t really want to know “he hung out with my opps” he looked me dead in the eyes and I don’t care “so you stabbed his brother” he pointed at me laughing “innocent until proven guilty, they locked me up for nothing” he laughed “but this guy right, he was a hustler, I give him that. But he hung with the wrong niggas, he hung with the people that put him down. He’s a little bitch, like half of these shots didn’t need to be aimed at him but they were and ever single one of this friends that have died is because of him, he’s a pagan, and we don’t like them people. You run with the devil you going to get burnt” squinting my eyes “but you do the same shit, I wonder how many of your friends have died because of you” he went silent and looked away from me “allow it though” he waved me off “plenty, I know this shit boy, we know. You both do the same shit just one has moved out and the other is still stuck on this shit, like grow up now” he sniggered “Halle you know how we do with this postcode war shit, I don’t play that. He moved and he switched, fucking white boy. I’ll beat his ass if I see him, Wadz ran from me. I don’t care about guy; I mean come on. I am me; I am here at Dior who the better one? Please don’t play me” Halle kissed her teeth “I am not doing this with you, but I know the shit, now shut up” I have no clue about this British shit they be talking about “guy is a joke” he laughed to himself “diggles, stop!” Halle spat.

I have already told Dior, I don’t want him touching me at all but the rest we can move with, but the pictures are fitting “we look good together, Rylee and Rhys. Yeah boy” side eyeing him “break for five” the assistant said “so tell me about yourself? I been around and like why you choose him, you have to break your neck to look up at me” he smirked “and I still don’t see it” I said, “oh shit, see you been quiet but like let me take you out and show you how a real man does shit” rolling my eyes “real man, do they exist?” he chuckled “yeah me man, you beautiful and clearly your standards are low because you went with a white man” I kissed my teeth “nigga shut up yeah, my standards are high. You don’t know him, I don’t care if he is whatever with you just shut up ok, I don’t want it. I am not interesting you are obsessed with my ex, get over it” now he made me snap “jeez I was just saying Rylee” shaking my head “I apologise but let me take you for some food, friend thing” shaking my head “no” where is Halle now “how you get with him and now me? He can’t handle a woman, like look at you, you’re peng. Beautiful peng, I don’t even care he been there. I will take it” I scoffed, I walked off “aye, you beautiful” he laughed, he is a fucking idiot, he just wants to piss me off and laugh about it. Let me just stand somewhere else, somewhere where there is peace, he does too much and finds it hilarious when it isn’t.

Turning to Halle and rolled my eyes “he never mentioned that he would be performing here at all, he knew he was doing the afterparty too” I said to Halle “girl, you know he going through some invisible trauma” I chuckled, out of all the afterparties, Central Cee performing here, I mean I don’t mind it. But he never mentioned it and I was never told he would be here either, I really think that he needs to relax. I told him I am not looking for others but Halle told me that in confidence so I can’t say anything to him, looking to Halle and laughing “he is a trip, he didn’t even say. Least he did Obsessed with you, and you right here in the crowd, chile. He love him some of you” I giggled to myself and looking back at the crowd “oh brother” of course he is here “I hope your trap boy is your type” Digga pointed as he made his way into my section “yeah I am not into them, I am turned off by them actually” he sniggered “I can change your mind, a real nigga” I scoffed “yeah I have heard this a millions of times, there is no real. The real I had is over with, he is the realist now drop it” he shook his head “I think he a little butt hurt seeing me here, aye! White boy” Halle swatted Digga “you leave him alone, why can’t you act normal. We are in France not fucking west” she spat “and I am saying hey to him? Can’t I be nice” shaking my head “I am not not doing this, I am not standing with you and you making him mad, it’s bad enough that you and I walked together and did a shoot, it’s business ok” I pointed “but you fine, and I think you need a real man. I won’t lay my hands on you” I kissed my teeth “nigga fuck you” I shook my head walking off “Why you being a bitch for” he grabbed my arm “the fuck you touching” I stepped back and hit his shoulder “you playing me b” he grabbed my hand and I moved “you stay out of it you fucking bird bitch, I am sick of your mouth” he said to Halle “you leave me alone and I will pretend this shit didn’t happen” I said to him, he stared me down “you fuck that white guy, you fuck anyone” he said in my face, a loud gasp left my lips as Digga was thrown down to the ground, he hit the table with the drinks and all the glass smashed. Oakley started to beat him up “holy shit” I just said, Digga threw Oakley off him “Oakley leave it!” I shouted to grab his arm, but Halle just moved me “oh my days, I been waiting on you bro” he is so demonic “fuck you bro” Juke kicked him in the face “he has a knife” I said to Halle “leave it!” I said “just stop” Digga got up like it’s nothing and went towards Oakley and punched him in the face but Oakley just didn’t care, they both grabbed each other and they both fell off the platform we are on, hitting the ground “he has a knife” I rushed away from Halle, security started to pile in “get off him! He has a fucking knife” pushing my way through.

They backed Oakley up in the corner, I managed to push my way through “your face, what did you do? Why did you do that, he has a knife, he could have stabbed you” I said “you got tissues? He needs tissues!” I spat, his nose is bleeding badly “I saw him touching you, I peeped it ok” the security guard tapped my shoulder “he needs to leave” I scoffed “he fucking didn’t do anything, Oakley just put your head back” he is so quiet “I am here!” Halle said “tissues” I ended up forcefully putting his head back and placed the tissue under his nose, Oakley is just staring at me and I stared at him back “why?” I said to him “he touched you, I saw it” I shook my head “and he had a knife, he is unhinged. Please don’t do that, I could have handled it” he didn’t need to do that “he needs to leave, now!” security are being so annoying “from the back! Don’t test me, you don’t know who the fuck I am, this afterparty is mine! Done for me by Dior and what I say goes, so you open the back door, you get a car for him! He will be then gone” who do they think they are “I am good, I am fine” Oakley said, moving hand back “allow it” he mumbled “Oakley, don’t say allow it and walk off” Halle said, “I am gone, don’t worry about it” Oakley just walked off “you stubborn man!” Halle shouted “nigga you ran from the fade again” why is Digga still here, then I see he is in handcuffs.

[chemical-killjoy]

The UN Needs To Change.

WOAH WOAH WOAH hold the FUCK. UP. I mean I knew the UN was a little fucked up, but there's veto power?

OK first of all, I'm mad I was never taught any of this in school. We need to learn about what's going on in other countries (not just western world ones or major powers) today and also their history. Not just ancient greece, rome and egypt, and our own countries as told by the victors. It's fucking important and I feel so stupid having to learn about this myself by researching at 20 years old. But I'm going down the rabbit hole so I know these things and hopefully (if this isn't too much of an essay) you guys will know too if you don't.

The UN has this thing called veto power. It's where the five major powers (the UK, USA, France, China and at the time the USSR, now Russia) have the right to reject an application without needing to have the major rule of the council.

Simply? If one of the Big Boys™️ says "I don't agree with you guys, even if you're all against me" they can still get the final decision to approve or reject whatever the council was voting on.

Also, these countries are what are called "Permanent Member states" on the 15-member security council, which means they cannot be kicked from the council, even after there 2 year term is up. Sounding rigged, huh? Let's not forget this setup hasn't changed much since 1946.

They can also choose to not veto things, and just not vote instead (abstain), and like most democracies (if you can call this such) if 9/15 vote for something, majority rules... But of the 10 non-permanent members, five are elected by the General Assembly each year (though they have a 2 year term, it's non-consecutive). But at least there are rules for this, with representation? The council has to be made up of: 5 members from African and Asian States, 1 from Eastern European States, 2 from Latin American States, 2 from Western European and other States... I don't know how I feel about these numbers tbh, especially considering that's not counting the Big 5.

(For anyone wondering this year's security council is Albania, Brazil, China, Ecuador, France, Gabon, Ghana, Japan, Malta, Mozambique, Russian Federation, Switzerland, United Arab Emirates, United Kingdom, United States)

Let's take a look at the number of times the big 5 have used their veto power:

At least France and the UK have told their mates it's not nice to use it that much. Because that really helps.

(Quick side note, YES, Russia has used their veto power regarding them grossly brutalizing Ukraine).

You want to know what else stood out to me? So there are 193 member states in the UN. There are 195 (recognised) countries in the world... So which 2 aren't part of the UN? The Vatican City and the State of Palestine.... I.... Yeah, I don't even have a response for that. Things need to change.

Look, the idea behind the UN is great. A peace keeping assembly made up of as many countries in the world as possible. It does help sometimes. But it needs one hell of an update, because this shit just can't continue.

Here's some links to where I got my info.

The UN veto voting system

Bloody important page with a ton of info and links

Countries in the UN

Even more important article (where I got the graph)

[yakumtsaki]

By popular demand of the two Wulf stans, here is the Wulf + Angel spare update! I don’t have a ton of pics because Angulf and Frances/Ti Ning are my plotless relaxation households so this is just a cute, drama-free, pet-filled interlude before the fuckery of college🐱🐶

So Angulf moved into this beautiful, gigantic house that I of course didn’t build and immediately got to work on Wulf’s insane ‘raise 20 puppies or kittens’ LTW. They adopted Calpurnia, Maximus, Scoprion, Mileena, and Ermac (aka the two spare dogs and three spare cats from the main house) as well as Vincent, Dali, and Pollock (aka the three out of four puppies that Brittany and Gunther’s dogs had).

Having 50000 pets comes with certain challenges, such as spending literally all your awake, non-working time taking care of them.

-It’s worth it! -It sure is, Wulfie! In fact, I think we should make this even worse and add a baby to the mix! -I couldn’t agree more, darling!

Oh God, FINE

Angel and Calpurnia got preggo at the same time and they spend all their time together, too cute ❤️

So Calpurnia had four puppies with Pollock, aka Bernard, Vera, Louis, and Charlie-

-and Angel and Wulf had.. Wilfred. Insert weary sigh. You’ll enjoy him in college, here he is torturing Bernard. 

-Fuck, that’s a LOT of dogs. 

How about you be the change you wanna see in the world and have some kittens already, Scorpion??

Scoprion finally finds love and has kittens with Heidi, the only pet in this household he hasn’t beaten up. Romantic!  

Now that things have settled down a bit Wulf and Angel both get jobs in medicine and we make the shocking discovery..

..THAT JACK DO IS A DOCTOR. OH MY GOD

-BOOOO, BOOO PETS BOOO

-YOU COME INTO MY HOUSE, JACK DO?!

Get him, Bernard!!! This is a Jack-Do-free zone!

The amount of pee puddles in this house is something else-

-but that doesn’t stop Sophie from showing up LITERALLY EVERY DAY to hang out with the pets.

Angel completes her Chief of Staff LTW..

-GOD SHE’S SO HOT WHEN SHE’S REALIZING HER DREAMS 

..And Wulf also becomes Chief of Staff a few days later, but of course his heart aspires to more important things.

-PUPPIES. KITTIES.

Yes Wulf, we know.

It’s become clear Angel and Wulf are legit soulmates, she keeps rolling wants to get a puppy or a kitten and actually made 10 pet best friends before Wulf LOL. Out-Komei’d by your own wife!

It’s birthday/Wilfred fucking off to college time! Pink Scarf Wren is apparently also a doctor, so God help you if you get sick in this town. 

Angulf remains eternally in love, and eternally surrounded by no less than 4 dogs at any given moment❤️

-ANGEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEL🎵 -Oh Wulfie, your tenor voice is the same since college! -It’s even deeper now, because of the pet hair I’ve inhaled!

-Ah, isn’t having this many pets such a blessing, Glitchy Butler #3? -Yes, it sure is something. I love how they wait for me to be done mopping so they can piss in the exact same spot.

Well you don’t like it when they piss by the stairs either, Glitchy, make up your mind.

-AWWW what a cute doggie! -Everyone in position? -Copy. -Ok she’s squatting, get her wallet, GO GO GO

-ROCK GRANDMA IN THE HOUSE TONIGHT

Pop art painting girl: Please move me. 

Have you ever wondered what 3 simultaneous pet fights taking place in the same spot look like? Wonder no more!

Ok so now that Angulf is retired we are legit broke, I’ve never been happier to see the genie in my life. 

-Hmmm, I’ve already asked for money, maybe I should ask for something else now.. -ASK FOR MORE MONEY YOU STUPID ASSHOLE -WE WILL KILL YOU IF YOU DON’T

So the pet situation around here might kinda be completely out of control:

And yet this lot hasn’t crashed once?? The power of love❤️

IT’S OVER. IT’S DONE. WE RAISED 20 PUPPIES AND KITTENS!!!!

-You did it, sweetheart, congratulations!!! -Oh darling, I couldn’t have done it without you, this was truly a folie à deux situation! 

Folie à trois if you count me!

-We don’t.

RUDE. And they lived happily ever after, with the only successful marriage this family has ever produced :)

[esc-is-holding-me-hostage]

 I'm finally done with writing my opinions on this year's songs! This post took way too much time and it's not even as funny as I hoped it would be :/

Anyway, enjoy.

Albania

When the revamp was announced, I was afraid that they'll have to get rid of some of the best parts of the song (like the opening chanting and that RRRRAAAAA), but not only they kept all of them, they even added a new drop, without removing the old one. And it works! Yeah, it's still a structural mess but it works!

Wish it was left fully in Albanian though. I also wish I had thighs like those...

 Armenia

Well, guess now we know the answer to "Will Armenia win ESC right after winning JESC". The answer is no, obviously.

But whatever, Snap is fine. It's pleasant and inoffensive. Which seems to be a recurring theme this year.

 Australia

He's a good singer, and there are genuine emotions put into the performance but I find the song really boring.

 Austria

It's alright, but I'm worried about how it'll gonna sound live, her voice sounds really processed.

Update: I originally wrote about Austria when only the studio version was available, but now the live vocals have been heard, and I was right. The girl can't keep up with the song at all.

 Azerbaijan

And once again, Azerbaijan gives us a song that could be sung by literally anyone. Are Azerbaijani artists forced to sign a contract specifying that they can't show any bit of their personality or their country's culture at Eurovision?

Belgium

Belgium has decided to shake up the formula a bit for the first time since 2017. Too bad that was a formula I really loved.

I genuinely don't have anything to say about Miss You, sorry. Pleasant and inoffensive once again.

 Bulgaria

A lot of people seem to genuinely dislike Intention but in my opinion it doesn't deserve any strong emotions. There is nothing to hate and nothing to love. Just some mediocre, toothless dad rock. Guitar solo is kinda cool tho.

 Croatia

Booooring. I'd call it pleasant and inoffensive too, but the lyrics rub me the wrong way. So, pleasant and a tiny bit offensive?

 Cyprus

Ela doesn't sound like it was written specifically for Eurovision and I mean it in a best way possible. It's still not really my thing, but at this point I'm just happy that Cyprus has given us something different from the usuual.

 Czech Republic

It's fine, just Czech Republic sending their trademark modern pop stuff.

 Denmark

The ballad part in the beginning does not need to take up a third of the runtime. Otherwise it's... cute?

 Estonia

Who would've thought that an Armenian guy from Estonia will give us a better country song than any of a dozen country artists at ASC?

 Finland

Ok, that guitar riff slaps. Then the lyrics start. Honestly, half of  them sound like placeholder lyrics someone put there just to keep the rhyme and then forgot to change them. "Killer shark in heels", my god. Also that tiger roar followed by a Johnny Test whip sound never fails to make me chuckle.

 France

You've heard of Slavic spring-worshiping rave in the woods.

Now get ready for Celtic devil-worshiping rave in the woods!

Fulenn slaps, I love it.

 Georgia

Gotta love how Georgia just keeps doing whatever the fuck they want, qualification chances be damned. That said, I respect what they're doing more than I like it.

 Germany

People weren't lying, it IS like Stressed Out but lame.

 Greece

Bittersweet love songs are just *chef's kiss*. Some people find Die Together creepy, but I think that it perfectly encapsulates young love in all of its overdramatization.

However, I like the lyrics more than the song as a whole. The first half is just a bit of a drag.

 Iceland

Oh, I love this one. It just feels so cosy and wintery, I can almost feel the cold wind on my face.

Ireland

Favourite "bop" of the year.

 Israel

This is probably the most flamboyant song I've ever seen at Eurovision, but there isn't anything else I can say about it.

 Italy

Okay, I know I've just said how much I love bittersweet love songs, but Brividi isn't really making it for me. Maybe it's because we have so many sad boy songs this year, maybe because I don't like falsettos, maybe because I had a clear favorite at Sanremo and still salty they didn't win, dunno. It's just alright for me.

 Latvia

I'm convinced that people who unironically love this song only do so because they're vegetarians/surface level environmentalists.

That said, I don't hate Eat Your Salad. Yeah, the chorus is repeated waaay to many times, but the song is fun, it has a sax solo, which is always a good thing and yes, it has that goddamn gutpunch of an opening line.

I BET they came up with the pussy line first and then based the whole song around it. And the way it's pronounced, jeez. The smugness is fucking palpable, you KNOW the guy is saying it with the biggest shit-eating grin on his face without even seeing him.

 Lithuania

I didn't get the hype around this one during PiN, but it grew on me.

 Malta

So instead of revamping a decent-ish song they had, they just threw the whole song out and replaced it with the blandest self-empowerment song they could find in the dumpster behind Melfest's HQ, huh? Ingenious plan, what could go wrong?

 Moldova

Is it the weakest out of Zdob si Zdub's entries? Yes. Does it still make me wanna dance? Yes.

Look, I'm from Eastern Europe, I'm basically genetically programmed to like this kind of music.

 Montenegro

Hey, Montenegro, glad to have you back, love the outfit in the music video. Oh, the song? It's also there, I guess.

 Netherlands

Okay, if I'm not gonna get my yearly fix of dark and moody™ pop from Belgium this year, I'll get it from their neighbors! I like it, but I  wish they went with Dans Mij Naar Huis instead.

 North Macedonia

It's very bland and mediocre, but I have to give Circles a pass, because at least it's not Superman.

 Norway

It wants to be a joke song but it misses a certain je ne sais quoi, the DIY charm of the best ESC joke songs. It's basically a prep cosplaying as a nerd. It's way to polished and professionally-produced to the point that the only thing that separates it from "normal" songs is the costume gimmick.

 Poland

I guess I like it slightly more that the rest of the sad boy ballads we're plagued by this year. Slightly.

 Portugal

I fucking love the instrumentation on this one.

 Romania

It's a song.

 San Marino

Is San Marino just gonna send horny Italians from now on? I mean, I'm not complaining.

P.S. if I see one more "Achille is just a Måneskin copycat" post, I'm gonna fucking scream.

 Serbia

Watching Konstrakta's performance with subtitles is an experience. But same as with Georgia. I respect it more than like it.

 Slovenia

It sounds surprisingly... Japanese. To the point that having lyrics in Slovenian almost feels wrong. I wish the guy had a bit more emotion in his voice though.

 Spain

I've said it before and I'll say it again. THIS is the true successor to Fuego, this is what Cyprus has been desperately trying to recreate.

 Sweden

Me? Liking Sweden? It's more likely than you think.

It's not groundbreaking for Sweden or anything, it's still a well-produced, professionally made Swedish pop, but I like it way more than any of the Sweden's previous entries from the past 10 years. Probably because it is, again, a bittersweet love song, and I have a soft spot for those.

 Switzerland

The pauses between words in this one really test the limits of my attention span.

 Ukraine

A song in Ukrainian for the third year in a row, thank God! (Not because I'm particularly patriotic, but because our singers apparently aren't allowed to have good English pronunciation)

 United Kingdom

It's better than what UK usually sends but not "Top 5 in the odds" better.

[corona-extra-newsletter]

3/15/20 corona extra: cracking open cold covid facts

Announcements & Thank Yous

“About This Newsletter” has been moved to the bottom so it’s easier to skip if you’ve seen the other ones.

Some institutions do not update on Sundays. I have included the date of everything that is in question. That is also why this update is early :)

Thank you to @hysterical-random-things for letting me know about the first death in NYC and where to find that news, to @nanook2000 for information and links about KY’s response, and to @akashicsage for all of the good deets on San Diego county. If you have reliable information from a good source that I don’t seem to have, please shoot me a message/ask/pigeon!

Places now included in the newsletter are: Utah, Oregon, Washington, the Netherlands, Minnesota, Kentucky, Georgia, Nebraska, the UK, and possibly some others I missed here but included in the newsletter. Please send an ask or a message if you would like a place included!

A word on mortality rates: they look very high in some places in the US right now because testing is limited to the sickest patients. People who have mild illness and are well enough to go or stay home may not have been tested until very recently when several states started mass testing/drive through testing. Testing is still limited in a lot of states, so this will be a rolling increase situation, I anticipate.

A word on case numbers: due to the aforementioned expansion of testing capacity in the US (thank fuck), case numbers are gonna grow in a really, really scary-looking way this week. This is not actually as scary as it seems, because it means we are catching more of the cases that would have gone unnoticed and have better information to help more people.

Just The Numbers

Case numbers

Total cases: 153,517 (10,982 new)

Total deaths: 5,735 (343 new)

China: 81,048 cases (27 new!!), 3204 deaths (10 new)

This gives us a mortality rate of ~3.95%

Excluding China: 72,469 cases (10,955 new), 2531 deaths (333 new)

143 countries/territories reporting cases, 9 are new today including:

Kazakhstan: 6 cases

Curacao: 2 cases

Namibia: 2 cases

Central African Republic: 1 case

Congo: 1 case

Equatorial Guinea: 1 case

Eswatini: 1 case

Mauritania: 1 case

Mayotte: 1 case

Italy is reporting over 20,000 cases with over 1400 deaths

Iran is reporting over 10,000 cases with over 700 deaths

South Korea, Spain, and Germany are reporting over 5,000 cases

SK reports 75 deaths

Spain reports 289 deaths

Germany reports 11 deaths

International/General News

Many places experiencing a worsening epidemic are following the lead of countries including South Korea and instituting drive-through testing and high-throughput testing. Some tests (like the ones being used in Vietnam) can have a result in as soon as an hour, enabling people to be quickly cleared or quarantined. (This is super cool science! Yay, science!)

Johns Hopkins University is putting on a webinar on Tuesday, 3/17. If you are interested, you can sign up/check it out here: https://www.jhsph.edu/events/2020/covid-19/

South Korea’s epidemic is currently being driven by a fringe religious group, which represents approximately 60% of all cases.

Italy’s health system is overwhelmed, which is likely why their case-fatality rate is so high. Doctors, nurses, respiratory techs, first responders, lab personnel, and everyone else involved in hospitals/health care are working their butts off and doing some frankly heroic shit to help people.

Singapore has instituted strict travel restrictions on visitors/transiting people from European countries, including Italy, France, Spain, and Germany; this is in addition to restrictions on visitors from Iran, China, and South Korea.

Some doctors from Washington state, USA (the ones seeing the most cases) are noticing that myocarditis (viral infection & inflammation of the heart) seems to be what kills patients, not the ARDS (acute respiratory distress syndrome) that requires ventilation. This is obviously in early stages and more research is ongoing.

The World Health Organization is setting up three hospitals with advanced respiratory care capabilities in Erbil, Baghdad, and Basra, Iraq.

Virology Corner

Today’s topic: where did SARS-CoV-2 come from?

SARS-CoV-2 is what’s known as a zoonotic virus. This means that it spread from animals to humans, and then gained the ability (through mutations) to pass from human to human.

We think that SARS-CoV-2 came from bats (Rhinopholus) or pangolins- which doesn’t mean we need to blame bats or pangolins for this, they’re innocent bystanders in the game of cat-and-mouse viruses and animals are constantly playing over evolutionary timescales. Also they’re pretty ding dang cute.

(Not to get much more depressing, but here goes, as humans encroach on more and more land and as climate change progresses, more zoonoses will affect humans. Sorry to be a mega-bummer.)

Question Tuesday

Today’s question comes from @adventurecalls! They ask (paraphrased because the ask got eaten): “If I do get sick, how do I know when it’s ok to go back to doing stuff?”

This is a really good question, and one that’s rapidly being worked out by public health people as we speak (whoa)!

In general, the thought is that once you’re totally recovered you’re not able to spread the virus, but there’s not concrete data on this. The best we have is this recent study in the Lancet (https://www.thelancet.com/journals/lancet/article/PIIS0140-6736(20)30566-3/fulltext) which indicates that people who recover shed virus for 20 days from symptom onset, whereas those who die shed virus continuously until their death, a maximum course of 37 days.

I obviously can’t give individual medical advice, which this is not, but the guidance from the WHO is excellent in general, and I will keep readers posted when there’s more information.

If you have questions, ask them and they’ll appear here in the next issue of corona extra!

Regional News (if you want somewhere added just let me know. Don��t be shy!! I highly recommend you just skip to your area if you don’t wanna be overwhelmed.)

Canada: last updated 9:00 AM EST 3/15/20

Total cases: 249 confirmed (+5), 4 presumed (-1), 1 death (3/9/20, no change)

All current cases had symptoms starting between 1/17/20 and 3/9/20

One of these cases is the PM’s wife (mild case); the couple are in quarantine for 14 days now. This is not expected to affect Canada’s management, but is definitely a reminder that being a political leader does not grant one immunity to COVID-19.

12% of cases have required hospitalization

79% of cases are in travellers, and a further 8% in their close contacts

Affected provinces include (both confirmed and presumptive cases): BC (73, +0), Alberta (39, -2), Saskatchewan (2, +0), Manitoba (4, +0), Ontario (103, +2), Quebec (24, +3), Newfoundland and Labrador (1) New Brunswick (2, +0), and PEI (1).

Newly affected provinces include: Newfoundland and Labrador

4 cases in repatriated travellers

The Netherlands

I do not speak Dutch so please correct me if I’ve fucked something up royally

1135 confirmed cases, 20 deaths

176 new cases, 8 new deaths

Provinces (?) affected include: Drenthe (15), Flevoland (19), Friesland (10), Gelderland (100), Groningen (9), Limburg (129), North Brabant (446), North Holland (90), Overijssel (28), Utrecht (109), South Holland (110), and Zeeland (12).

I think this is all of them based on a quick Wikipedia investigation?

Interestingly they tested a bunch of people who work in a hospital and found a pretty high (4%) rate of asymptomatic infection. This seems like bad news (are these people spreading, etc) but it’s actually pretty good news because it means the mortality rate is lower than we think. I’ll update here as I find out more, which is hampered by my inability to speak Dutch.

New Zealand

8 confirmed cases, 2 probable cases

2 new cases, one of which was diagnosed in Australia

Both patients were on international flights and there is extensive contact tracing underway

2 patients have required hospitalization but both have been discharged

6700 people have completed self-isolation, 3015 people continue to be isolated

These people all deserve a medal, thank you for protecting your communities!

Golden Princess cruise berthed in Akaroa has one confirmed and two potential cases. The ship is quarantined now.

Norway 

1077 cases, 166 of which are new

I still don’t speak Norwegian so if I screwed up lemme know

Only 1 confirmed death, possibly one more to be confirmed 3/16 but only official numbers go here

Also possible that it’s been confirmed and I don’t know because I don’t speak Norwegian

287 cases are due to community transmission, 710 acquired outside of Norway, the rest are undetermined

Locations where people became infected include Austria (491), Italy (144), Switzerland (14), UK (12), Spain (9), France (8), USA (7), Iran (5), China (1), Hong Kong (1), other countries with more than 3 cases (80), and other countries with less than 3 cases (20).

Breakdown of cases by area: Agder (55, +3), Innlandet (72, +16), Møre og Romsdal (20, +4), Nordland (8, +0), Oslo (281, +59), Rogaland (127, +9), Troms og Finnmark (20, +4), Trøndelag (50, +4), Vestfold og Telemark (48, +9), Vestland (118, +9), and Viken (278, +47)

Good job Nordland! No new cases today! :D

United Kingdom in general: this is pretty rough because apparently the public health strategy coming from Boris is “herd immunity” aka let everyone get sick and then they’ll all be immune, since the only other way to get herd immunity is a vaccine that…..we don’t have yet. Boris does not understand how to medicine. 

Fuck you, Boris.

1372 total cases (+20%), 232 are new today

35 total deaths, 14 new today

England

1099 total cases

Affected NHS regions are as follows: London (407), South East (175), Midlands (94), North East and Yorkshire (91), North West (76), East of England (71), and South West (61).

Deaths are not being reported by the PHS but I will do my best to split these out in the next few editions using news reports etc

Scotland

153 cases total and 1 death

Affected health boards are as follows: Ayrshire and Arran (6), Borders (7), Fife (7), Forth Valley (10), Grampian (12), Greater Glasgow and Clyde (39), Highland (2), Lanarkshire (16), Lothian (28), Shetland (11), and Tayside (15).

I don’t know if this is all of the health  boards in Scotland but it sure is the ones that have confirmed covid19.

Wales

94 cases, 34 new

Welsh authorities are now recommending that anyone who develops a persistent cough and/or fever self-isolate, and only call 111 if they are unable to cope with their symptoms at home

Affected areas include: Blaenau Gwent County (3, +2), Bridgend County (1, +0), Caerphilly County (11, +4), Carmarthenshire County (7, +3), City & County of Swansea (18, +4), City of Cardiff (8, +3), Conwy County (1, +0), Flintshire County (1, +0), Isle of Anglesey (1, +0), Monmouthshire County (5, +1), Neath Port Talbot (11, +0), Newport City (5, +3), Pembrokeshire (2, +0), Powys County (5, +0), and Wrexham County (1, +0).

Newly affected areas include: Ceredigion County (1), Rhondda Cynon Taf County (2), Torfaen County (2), and Vale of Glamorgan (1).

Northern Ireland

45 cases, 11 new

This is all the data I have, sorry

This may actually be a thing that makes northern/southern Ireland cooperate, which is a small spark of hope in the raging dumpster fire that is this pandemic (I hyperbolize, but only slightly)

US in general: All this info is from the state & county health departments unless I say otherwise. The national response is a trash fire (but maybe hopefully improving this week??) CDC information is updated weekdays; total US cases are from 3/13 at 4 PM

1629 total cases, 41 deaths (2.5% mortality rate), with 46 states and DC reporting cases.

CDC is now recommending all in person gatherings with more than 50 people be canceled for the next 8 weeks. This sucks for me personally and probably a lot of you all too. Hang in there.

California: updated around 10 AM PST, 3/15/20

The state dept of health is not providing a ton of info right now, so all of this is coming from county health departments, which are doing really excellent work btw. Love local public health departments <3

My official take is that the higher level government orgs in the US are muzzled from above and therefore totally shitting the bed and the county-level public health officials are really stepping up to the plate

Total cases not including the ones at Miramar (discussed below): 363, with 4 total deaths

Affected counties include: Alameda (7), Calaveras (2), Contra Costa (29), Fresno (2), Humboldt (1 - recovered), Imperial (2), Los Angeles (53, +11), Madera (1), Marin (5), Orange (14), Placer (8), Riverside (10), Sacramento (29) San Benito (3 - 2 recovered), San Diego (8), San Francisco (28), San Joaquin (8), San Luis Obispo (1), San Mateo (32), Santa Clara (91), Santa Cruz (7), Shasta (1), Solano (6), Sonoma (4), Stanislaus (2), Tulare (2), Ventura (5), Yolo (2)

San Diego: My numbers are not gonna include the federal quarantine situations at Miramar (for repatriated people and the Diamond Princess passengers) because that’s what makes sense right now regarding community transmission. If this changes I will say so.

Unaffected counties include: Alpine, Amador, Butte, Colusa, Del Norte, El Dorado, Glenn, Inyo, Kern, Kings, Lake, Lassen, Mariposa, Mendocino, Merced, Modoc, Mono, Monterey, Napa, Nevada, Plumas, San Bernardino, Santa Barbara, Sierra, Siskiyou, Sutter, Tehama, Trinity, Tuolumne, Yuba

Counties with confirmed community transmission include: Los Angeles, Marin, Orange, Riverside, San Joaquin, Santa Clara, Sonoma

Newly affected counties include San Luis Obispo (3/14)

Colorado - last updated 3/14 at 3 PM

Colorado Springs Bridge Center is under an advisory for possible exposure

Drive-up testing is available now, in Denver and Lowry and possibly other places

1 death, 3/13/20, in El Paso County, a female in her 80s

Community spread has been confirmed

101 confirmed cases, 1 death

Affected counties include: Adams (6), Arapahoe (10), Denver (20), Douglas (4), Eagle (18), El Paso (3), Gunnison (6), Jefferson (9), Larimer (1), Mesa (1), Pitkin (2), Pueblo (1), Summit (2), Weld (3)

Out of state visitors who have tested positive are tallied separately. They are located in the following counties: Pitkin (9), Eagle (2), Routt (1), Denver (1), unknown (2 - wtf??)

Florida - last updated 145 AM EST 3/15/20

115 (+45) cases and 4 deaths (+0)

Florida has not yet confirmed community transmission but it’s almost certainly happening. I’m no longer separating counties with and without confirmed community transmission because of that.

Also, the numbers by county do not add up to the same total because locations are updated less frequently by FLDPH than the total number of cases.

Affected counties  include: Alachua (1, +0), Broward (36, +16), Charlotte (1, +0), Clay (3, +2), Collier (5, +2), Duval (4, +3), Hillsborough (4, +2), Lee (5, +1), Manatee (4, +0), Miami-Dade (13, +5), Nassau (1, +0) Okaloosa (1, +0), Orange (2, +1), Osceola (1), Palm Beach (5, +0), Pasco (2, +1) Pinellas (2, +0), Santa Rosa (1, +0), Sarasota (1, +0) Seminole (1, +0), Volusia (5, +1)

Newly affected counties include: Citrus (1), St. John’s (1)

Port Everglades is under an advisory due to several cases connected to a cruise company based there.

Georgia: last updated 3/15 at 11:43 AM

Y’ALL THEY MADE A HASHTAG. I am NOT making this up. It’s #covid19ga if you want to use that, I guess???

99 cases, 1 death

Affected counties include: Bartow (9), Charlton (1), Cherokee (6), Clayton (2), Clarke (2), Cobb (19), Coweta (2), Dekalb (10), Dougherty (6), Fayette (5), Floyd (4), Fulton (20), Gordon (2), Gwinnett (4), Henry (1), Lowndes (2), Lee (2), Newton (1), and Polk (1).

Illinois: last updated 3/14/20

64 confirmed cases, 16 new, with confirmed community spread

New cases: Chicago (7), Cook not Chicago (4), Kane (1), Lake (1)

195 pending persons under investigation

Affected counties include Cook, Kane, McHenry

Newly affected counties include: Woodford (1), Cumberland (1), St. Clair (2), DuPage (1, first long-term care facility case)

Iowa: last updated 3/14/20

Total cases: 18, 1 new 3/14

Affected counties include: Carroll (1), Dallas (1), Harrison (1), Johnson (14), and Pottawattamie (1)

Community spread confirmed on 3/14/2020

Kansas: last updated 3/14/20

8 confirmed cases

Affected counties include: Johnson (5), Wyandotte (1), Butler (1), Franklin (1)

Kentucky: last updated 3/14 at 6 pm local time

18 confirmed cases

2 new cases, both in Fayette County

One patient in Nelson County tested positive but left the hospital and refused to quarantine himself. Don’t be like this guy. Please. I’m expecting a lot more cases to pop up in Nelson county over the next couple weeks all connected to this one patient.

Apparently there’s now a bunch of cops sitting outside his house to make sure he stays there. Ffs.

Affected counties include: Harrison (6), Fayette (7), Jefferson (3 or 4, possible repeat test), Bourbon (1), Nelson (1), and Montgomery (1)

Governor is recommending hospitals stop elective procedures and childcare centers plan for closure by 3/17/20. Also put in place a bunch of important protections for people who don’t have insurance and stuff. Good job, KY!

First patient has fully recovered! Yay!

Louisiana: last updated 9:30 am 3/15/20

91 cases reported, 14 new

2 deaths, 1 new

Parishes affected:  Jefferson (12, +1), Lafourche (1, +0), Orleans (65, +12), St. Charles (2, +0), St. John the Baptist (1, +0), St. Tammany (4, +2), and Terrebonne (2, +1)

New parishes affected: Bossier (1), Caddo (1), St. Bernard (1)

Massachusetts: last updated 4 pm 3/14/20

138 cases (19 lab confirmed, 119 presumptive positives)

1 new lab confirmed case, 14 new presumptive positives

1083 people in quarantine

Affected counties include: Berkshire (9, 0% change), Essex (5, +150%), Middlesex (65, +8%), Norfolk (28, +16%), Suffolk (27, +3%), and Worcester (2, 0% change)

Newly affected counties include: Barnstable (1) and Bristol (1)

5 cases travel related, 104 (+10%) in one community transmission cluster, others unknown

11 hospitalized, 105 not hospitalized, the rest pending (22)

1 new hospitalization

Michigan: last updated 3/14/20 in the evening

33 cases, 8 new, 0 deaths

Affected counties include: Bay (1), Charlevoix (1), Ingham (1), Kent (3), Macomb (2), Monroe (1), Montcalm (1), Oakland (9), St. Clair (1), Wayne (8), and Washtenaw (4)

Likely community transmission

Minnesota: last updated 3/15

35 cases, community transmission confirmed

Affected counties include: Anoka, Carver, Dakota, Hennepin, Olmstead, Ramsey, Renville, Stearns, Waseca, Washington, and Wright

County numbers are not currently being provided by MN dept of health, just ranges. Hennepin and Ramsey counties have 6-20 cases each.

Hopefully they’ll pull an Ohio and help a girl out soon

Drive through testing available in Olivia

Nebraska: last updated 3/15

Community transmission confirmed: many locations in Douglas County are potential places where transmission has occurred; if you live or have traveled to Douglas County (Omaha), please check the Douglas County COVID-19 monitoring site.

There were also two exposures in Knox County on March 5, at basketball games at Lincoln Southwest HS and North Star HS.

17 cases, no deaths

Affected counties include: Cass (1), Douglas (15) and Knox (1)

New Jersey : last updated 3/14 at 2 pm

69 cases (+38%), 1 death (none new)

Affected counties include: Bergen (25, +47%), Burlington (3, no change), Camden (2, +1), Essex (7, +1), Hudson (5, +2), Middlesex (10, +6), Monmouth (8, +1), Morris (3, no change), Ocean (1, no change), Passaic (2, -1 apparently?), Somerset (1, no change), and Union (1, no change)

Newly affected counties include: Mercer (1)

I dread updating NJ just because the website sucks so bad

Thank you to the commenter who noted that the help line apparently rules and they’ve been advertising it heavily, that’s awesome public health work by NJ!

So that’s a bright spot, eh?

New York: last updated 3/14 at 8 PM

613 cases, 192 new, 1 new death

Affected counties include: Westchester (178, +12%), Nassau (79, +54%), Suffolk (41, +13), Rockland (12, +3), Ulster (5, +0), Dutchess (4, +1), Orange (6, +3), Saratoga (3), Albany (5, +3), Broom (1, +0), Delaware (1, +0), Herkimer (1, +0), Monroe (2, +1), and Schenectady (1, +0).

NYC has 269 cases (+75%) as of 3/15 at noon

Newly affected counties include: Erie (3), Tioga (1), and Tompkins (1)

Drive through testing in New Rochelle and Long Island

All public places are closed in New Rochelle through March 25.

Ohio: last updated 3/15 at 2 pm

36 confirmed cases, 10 new

350 people under investigation

Affected counties include: Belmont (2), Butler (6), Cuyahoga (14), Franklin (3), Lorain (2), Lucas (1), Medina (1), Stark (2), Summit (2), Trumbull (2), Tuscarawas (1)

THEY STARTED GIVING COUNTY BY COUNTY INFO, PRAISE THE LORD!!!

Oregon: last updated 3/14 at 11:00 AM

36 cases, 13 hospitalized at time of positive test, 1 death (3/14)

The following counties are affected: Clackamas (1), Deschutes (3), Douglas (1), Jackson (2), Klamath (1), Linn (9), Marion (2), Multnomah (1), Polk (1), Umatilla (2), and Washington (13).

Pennsylvania: last updated 3/15 at noon

Gritty is now loose and is singlehandedly responsible for all cases in Philadelphia, if you see the orange monster, RUN

63 total cases, 16 new today

No deaths, Gritty is thankfully failing in his mission to murder

Counties affected include: Allegheny (3, +1) Bucks (4, +1), Chester (2, +0), Cumberland (5, +2), Delaware (7, +1), Monroe (6, +3), Montgomery (24, +4), Northampton (1, +0), Philadelphia (6, +2), Pike (1, +0), Washington (1, +0), Wayne (1, +0)

Newly affected counties include: Lehigh (1) and Luzerne (1)

446 people under investigation pending test results

Rhode Island: last updated 3/13/20

~500 people in quarantine for close contact situations

57 pending people under investigation

20 confirmed cases, no deaths

Next expected update 3/16 in the AM

South Dakota: last updated 3/15

9 confirmed cases, no new cases since 3/14

6 pending cases under investigation

Affected counties include: Beadle (1), Bon Homme (1), Charles Mix (1), Davison (1), McCook (1), Minnehaha (3), and Pennington (1)

No community transmission

Texas: last updated 3/15

56 total cases, 5 new.

Highly likely that there has been community transmission, unconfirmed currently

Affected counties include: Bell (1, +0), Bexar (3, +2), Brazoria (2, +0), Collin (6, +1), Dallas (8, +0), El Paso (1, +0), Fort Bend (9, +0), Galveston (1, +0), Gregg (1, +0), Harris (10, +0), Hays (1, +0), Lavaca (1, +0), Montgomery (3, +0), Smith (4, +1), Tarrant (3, +0), and Travis (1, +0)

Newly affected counties include: Matagorda (1)

The Texas DPH has corrected a tabulation error that affected Gregg and Travis counties.

Utah: last updated 3/15

21 total cases, 14 cases in Utah residents

Affected health districts include: Davis County (3), Salt Lake county (14), Southwest Utah (1), Summit County (2), and Weber-Morgan (1)

The Utah Jazz managed to get more testing than the rest of the country for awhile there, so that’s great for them

Whoever does your graphic design, *greatjob* (the little virus instead of the UDPH logo is CHOICE)

Also, the website is super useful and readable, 10/10 good job Utah

First case of community spread identified on 3/14/20, in Summit County

Schools and universities are closed starting 3/16/20, Mormonism is closed until further notice, and skiing is canceled in Park City and Cottonwood Canyon for a minimum of a week. If you are interested in skiing in Utah, check Ski Utah for a list of closures.

Virginia: last updated 3/15

45 cases total, 4 new

Affected counties/cities include: Arlington (8, +1), Chesterfield (1, +0), Fairfax (10, +0) James City (8, +1), Loudoun (5, +0), Virginia Beach City (4, +1), Prince William (3, +1), Spotsylvania (1, +0), Prince Edward (1, +0), Hanover (1, +0), Harrisonburg City (1, +0), and Alexandria City (1, +0)

No newly affected areas today.

Washington: last updated 3/14 at 2:45 PM

Godspeed, y’all are having a real rough time right now. Yipes. Washington is really hard hit right now, especially King County. Look to Washington State and how they’re coping for a preview of how things are gonna go as the cases develop elsewhere.

642 total cases, 40 deaths (6.2% mortality)

Affected counties include: Clark (3), Columbia (1), Grant (2), Grays Harbor (1), Island (6), Jefferson (1), King (387), Kitsap (3), Kittitas (3), Pierce (26), Skagit (4), Snohomish (154), Spokane (3), Thurston (3), Whatcom (2), and Yakima (4).

39 cases are currently unassigned to a county. These are expected to resolve in the coming days, hopefully.

Deaths have occurred in the following counties: Grant (1), King (35), Snohomish (4),

Wisconsin: last updated 3/15 at 2 PM

33 total cases (6 new), 1 recovered, 0 deaths

Affected counties include: Dane (6, +0), Fond du Lac (11, +5), Milwaukee (7, +1), Pierce (1, +0), Racine (1, +0), Sheboygan (3, +0), Waukesha (3, +0), and Winnebago (1, +0)

Today’s Hot Tips

Make sure you have ibuprofen and tylenol/acetaminophen/APAP/paracetamol at home before you get sick. This isn’t just covid advice, this is life advice in general. (Obvs, ask your doctor about what’s safe to take if you have chronic health conditions etc but this is a general recommendation, not medical advice. As I said, life advice.)

As far as I know, ibuprofen and tylenol are ok, but research may change this. Current research indicates that steroids, which are used in other severe respiratory conditions, may make COVID-19 associated acute respiratory distress syndrome (ARDS) worse. More on this later.

It still can’t hurt to have some tylenol around, though, ya know?

Hand Washing Song of the Day

If you hate singing happy birthday while you wash your hands, I certainly do, try Good as Hell by Lizzo instead!

Sing from “I do my hair toss” to “If he don’t love you anymore” at minimum (if you’re like me and can’t leave a lyric unfinished, go ahead and dry your hands while making your brain happy.) to follow CDC handwashing guidelines! Use soap and water for maximum virus-murdering.

Chill Cat  Otter Corner

https://gfycat.com/pastjovialalligatorgar-otter

Please watch these otters sproing and chase!

About this newsletter

I’m Emily, I’m a 4th year med student w/ a degree in molecular biology. I wrote this because I’m an infectious disease and epidemiology nerd and also all my friends have questions & anxiety. Hi internet!

All this info is sourced from regional & national public health organizations, plus the WHO. It’s as up to date as humanly possible. I’ve been beaming information about this outbreak directly into my brain 24/7 but I still miss stuff. Please let me know if I miss something!

Most public health departments stop updating their information around 4-5 PM local time on weekdays. That means that the earliest this will come out is around 6 PM Pacific time on weekdays going forward. On weekends things update more sporadically and earlier, so who knows what I’ll do then, but I’ll do my best.

Thank you to @marywhal for the excellent title!

For More Information

JHU COVID-19 data center: https://gisanddata.maps.arcgis.com/apps/opsdashboard/index.html#/bda7594740fd40299423467b48e9ecf6

List of peer-reviewed publications: https://www.cdc.gov/coronavirus/2019-ncov/publications.html

WHO daily sitrep: https://www.who.int/docs/default-source/coronaviruse/situation-reports/20200315-sitrep-55-covid-19.pdf?sfvrsn=33daa5cb_6

WHO FAQ: https://www.who.int/news-room/q-a-detail/q-a-coronaviruses

CDC cases in the US (take w/ a grain of salt due to Political Garbage, as detailed above): https://www.cdc.gov/coronavirus/2019-ncov/cases-in-us.html, this also has links to each state’s health dept which may or may not be more up to date than the CDC

[revisionaryhistory]

Three Days ~ 87

Emma

Slow dancing and kissing in the middle of the floor had been as perfect of goodbye as a goodbye could be. Sebastian had updated his playlists. There was nothing sexual. Every song was I love you, I've been waiting for you, I'm happy you're mine. Intense love songs. I felt every one. I stayed in the moment, focusing on how good this felt. We held each other, swaying to the music and alternating between my head laying on his shoulder, gazing in the other's eyes, or kissing. We were in our own little bubble. There was nothing but how his body felt against mine, how he smelled, and the look of his face. All I felt was encapsulated in a swirl of feelings. Love, joy, and a touch of sadness hiding on the edge.

The bubble burst with the knock on the door. Time to go. there was no chance of getting through this without tears. Strong emotions always bring tears. I don't fight them. Letting them out feels better. I don't think emotions are anything to be ashamed of or hide. They're also not something to manipulate others with.

At the car, we were both crying. Not holding onto each other sobbing, just tears.

Saying goodbye was hard. His "I love you. I'll miss you. I'll talk to you Later. Send nudes." broke the sadness enough to get the car door closed. I watched him slide away. I wiped away a few more tears before talking myself down. Six weeks was a long fucking time, but it wasn't forever. It would probably feel like it, however.

My solution was to avail myself of the Air France business class lounge. Two shots of tequila and I switched to wine. It went better with the cheese. I was going to have to hit the gym hard when I got home. And eat better. Not today though I was sad and there was free cheese.

As usual, I was asleep before we reached cruising altitude. I woke up with about five hours to go. Fingers crossed that helped with the jet lag. I put on my favorites playlist and read until we landed.

Emma ~ I’ve landed Sebastian ~ Yay! Emma ~ Go back to sleep. Sebastian ~ XOXO

I knew he had an early call time tomorrow. It was only five pm here in New York. Closer to seven by the time I got back to Sebastian's place. I made it long enough to throw a load of laundry into the washer and the cheese into the fridge before crawling into bed. I took over his side of the bed, sniffing the pillows to find the one that smelled most like him. I curled around it and was out.

Five am was the latest my body was going to let me sleep. That was eleven am in France. So too early for New York and kinda late for France. I grabbed my phone to take a sleepy selfie but was distracted by my text notification. Sebastian had sent me a picture of him reclining on a couch, not in our rooms, with Guiletta asleep on his chest.

Sebastian ~ Found someone new to sleep on my chest.

I continued with my original plan to take an up-close picture of my eyes peeking out over the top of his pillow. My hair was a mess, my eyes look half-asleep, and there was a faint pillow crease on my temple. Perfect.

Emma ~ I miss you too

The sun was up with a bright blue sky. Since it was Saturday the traffic at this time of day would be much less. I had a clean pair of shorts, but not a shirt. No problem. My boyfriend had t-shirts. A little big, but perfectly functional. Runners, earphones, keys and I was out the door for an early morning run.

The city was beautiful. sunlight crept around corners and over the tops of shorter buildings. I ran south past the 9-11 memorial to Battery Park. I'd always been fascinated by the metal world with tears and chunks missing. The first time I'd seen I'd said out loud, "It looks like the world blew up." I guess I wasn't far off. The sculpture had been in the World Trade Center Plaza and been damaged by falling debris. I was only eight and all I remember was my parents being glued to CNN for hours. It would be years later, when I called the city home, before I really understood. As much as a non-native New Yorker could.

The worst thing about running this early was all the stores were closed. The best thing about running this early was all the stores were closed. I admit my shopping had been out of hand. In my defense, it had been a very long time since I'd had someone to dress up for. Don't take that wrong. Beacon dates with a man or friends was an opportunity to dress up. Coming into New York to be with Angie and Eli was a good opportunity. Both opportunities I used well. Still, having a man appreciate what you wear and how you look in it is another level. I know what I look good in. I'm not changing my choices for Sebastian, or any man, but I will take his preferences into account. Shopping right now would be a bad idea. I’m sure I'm packing around a few extra pounds of cheese, bread, and wine. I'm hoping all the walking mitigated some of the damage.

On my way back, a couple of blocks from Sebastian's the city was waking up. More people and sounds. I realized tonight would be the first time I'd been alone in the city in about five years. I made plans to sit in the dark and just listen. I picked up a bagel and a smoothie that I was told would rejuvenate me. I wonder if the barista could tell? I broke into Sebastian's stash of nut butter. Half a bagel with cashew butter the other with almond. Cashew was better.

Being alone in his space is weird. None of my stuff is here. It's like a hotel, but not. I got a little nosey after I'd showered and dressed. Not in a going through his drawers and medicine cabinet nosey. Looking at his DVD and CD collection. Running my fingers down the spines of his books, pulling out ones that caught my interest to thumb through. I made a stack of things I wanted to read. I did go through his kitchen pretty thoroughly. It looks like a single man who travels and eats out a lot lives here. He doesn't have flour. How does one not have flour? He does have quite a condiment collection. I threw out expired things and made a list to replace them. That led me on a short journey to see if there was anything else he was almost out of and added things to the list.

Time to call the best friends. Angie picked up on the third ring, her voice excited to hear from me, "You're home!"

"I’m at Sebastian's. I meet with my advisor Monday."

"I want to see all the pictures and hear all the stories. We're going out tonight. Some friends are playing. You're welcome."

"Can I let you know later? I don't know what the time change is going to do."

"Absolutely. So.... " the paused after dragging out the word, "are you missing him? How was goodbye?"

"Goodbye took forever. Neither of us wanted to let go. At least half a dozen last kisses. Sucked. I miss him, but I'm okay. I'll be fine when I get home and am doing stuff. I've cleaned expired shit out of his kitchen and made a grocery list."

"That's cute. Hope he thinks so."

I hadn't thought about his opinion one way or another. I was just getting rid of shit before it stank up the place. "He won't care."

We talked for a while, deciding we'd do brunch tomorrow.

I was bored. I didn't lack for things to do, but I didn't have a routine here. Especially not without him. It didn't feel like home without him. Once I'd figured that out I was good and went about making myself at home.

I'd changed Sebastian's ringtone from "Dancing Queen" to my favorite part in "Every Time I’m With You." It was near the end after a heavy drumbeat "cause every time I'm with you I feel wanted. We could make believers if we dare. We're just two believers if we dare." It was incredible the first time we'd danced to it and it was incredible now. I heard it about six, midnight in France.

I'd barely registered his face before I heard his voice, "If I put that picture on my laptop and my laptop in the bed, I can pretend it's you."

I felt warm all over and smiled, "Yes, you can. Tell me about the first day of shooting."

"It was good. Long, but good. I'm comfortable with Jess and I like her direction." He told me stories that made me proud and made me laugh. "I did well today. What have you been up to?"

I gave him a quick rundown on my day, leaving the bit about making myself at home until last.

He closed his eyes and shook his head. "I can't believe you restocked my kitchen. Thank you. Do whatever you want to feel at home."

"What if I reorganized your drawers because your way doesn't make sense?"

"Have at it. I'll just think I forget and think I did it."

"And your kitchen so it flows better."

He shook his head, "I don't know what that means. Knock yourself out."

I laughed, "I didn't do either."

I loved the lines that formed at the corners of his eyes when he genuinely smiled. Like now, "I don't care what you do. I just want you to feel at home.”

Now we were where I wanted to be, "Here's the thing... my favorite foods in your kitchen, finding where I'm most comfortable to work on my laptop, and figuring out where has the best view when I want to relax with a book are good, but it's not enough. Doing all that did help me figure what's missing."

"What's missing and where can we get it?"

"It's free and I already found it. You make where ever we are home. You're my home."

"I'm your home." He looked a little dazed.

"When you were in my place I felt at home. At your parents, I felt at home. Being at your place with you I was perfectly at home. Paris too. Now I’m back and I did things to feel at home. Took a while until I realized its missing something. You. When I'm with you, wherever we are, I’m home."

I could tell he was processing, by the way his tongue moved, "I like that."

He kept thinking, squinting his eyes a little, "I don't know if you're my home. Not sure where home is. Sometimes I don't feel at home in my own skin. I like that I’m your home." He cringed, "The next couple of weeks are going to suck for you."

I banred out a laugh, "No, once I knew what the issue was I adjusted. I'm good now."

"You don't miss me anymore?"

"Oh, I miss you a lot." Were transitioned into silly conversation.

"Ok, good."

I gasped, "You want me to suffer?"

"Terribly." His eyes were wide as he nodded his head. "So much so that when you see me again you throw yourself into my arms and hold on so tight I can't breathe."

"Therefore making you suffer."

"Yes, please."

I did end up going out with Angie and Eli. Thankfully it was a jeans sort of bar. My hope was if I stayed moving I'd fall over, get a good night's sleep, and get back on New York time. It was a good fun night.

Sunday I took a run before getting ready for Angie to come over. I'd bribed her with her favorite home-cooked meal. I had her take pictures of me in various outfits around his apartment. At one point Angie rolled her eyes, "I can not believe I'm taking pictures of you rolling around in his bed."

"Six weeks, Angie. I suck at selfies. I need a stockpile to pull from."

"What you need is a class in basic photo editing on an iPhone."

"I know."

We went back to her place, stopping for supplies on the way. A few hours later we were feasting on cilantro lime salmon,  a creamy garlic parmesan orzo, and a greek salad. I've taught Angie to cook this several times, but she tells me it's never quite right. I think she skimps on the butter and that's a big no. And a healthy splash of the Sauvignon blanc lifts the whole thing a little.

Sebastian and I exchanged texts over the course of the day. A comment or question with stretches of time between answers. Mostly from him. I got excited when an unexpected text came through. His response to my dinner picture was a request for the same meal. Maybe with his parents.

Monday was a busier day. I had to dress like a doctoral student, pack my bags, clean up after myself, and plant surprises like the notes I keep finding in my condo. Mine are more fun. The green g- string from concert night is mixed in with his boxers. A couple of dresses parked next to something they matched well. A peach tank top mixed in with his workout gear. I had Angie take a picture in each room. Printed and framed them. My favorite is me sitting on the toilet. It has a lovely frame and is now on the wall across from the throne. I wanted everything ready for me to leave for home straight from my advisory meeting

My advisory meeting lasted a little over three hours. Three good hours. Dr. Kershaw had been appointed my advisor. I'd taken a class with her while working on my Master's and my second winter in Beacon, but at the time I'd been excited to work with students and studying digital classroom technology was something I wasn't wanting to explore. I wanted to be hands-on molding little minds and still wasn't sure what I wanted to do, but I'd enjoyed working on our team's website. Google Classroom was functional but limited by design. Three hours later I had it narrowed down.

Sebastian had texted me good luck this morning with a picture of his face, eyes closed and lips puckered. I'd sent back a picture of my legs, crossed at the ankles with my skirt draped to the side, while sitting in his favorite chair. I was more than halfway home when his ringtone came through my vehicle's speaker. I hit the button, "Hey, baby."

I could hear his smile in his voice, "Sounds like your lunch went well."

"It did!" I was still excited from lunch and the phone call with Angie after. "I like my advisor. There's only ten of us in the program with the plan to add ten more each fall."

"Wow!" He interjected. "So being accepted is even more impressive."

"Yeah." I was proud of myself. "Small and first-year makes everything very personalized. All of the potential classes overlap with other programs. Cognitive theory from Psych, advanced reading from Education, some Education Law and leadership, computer tech, and even game design. We spent a lot of time talking about what I’m passionate about. In the and I’m thinking I want to focus on reading intervention and programming for K-3."

"Which is what you're passionate about."

I laughed, "and you."

"And me. Did you just talk about direction or is there a plan? What coursework did they accept."

"The fifteen hours I've taken will apply. We designed a basic timeline. I've taken six hours the last two years. I'm confident I can handle that with work and having a life. If I want to take more I can. I don't want to take classes in the summer. Those are usually compressed and pretty intense, plus I'm not in a hurry. Somewhere in the middle, I write a thesis, which looks at a problem or a hole in what already exists. That will feed into my dissertation. I can either do research and design an experiment like comparing existing programs or create my own product."

"Any idea which way you want to go?"

"None at all. I figure the thesis will help figure that out."

"And when do I have to start calling you Doctor?" The seductive tone in his voice told me "have to" wasn't going to be a hardship.

"Three to four years. No summers and using the last semester for my dissertation is four. If I add a class in a couple of semesters or summer and do my dissertation concurrently then three. I have to be done in ten. I'm thinking I’ll figure out what I want to do the first two then design and implement the last two. A lot will depend on how long that takes." He couldn't see me, but I was waving a hand in the air. "It will work itself out."

"I love you."

"I love you. Enough me, tell me about your day."

We talked the rest of the way home where we had some fun.

I called Seattle and went through it all again with Ed. He was as excited and proud of me as was Seb. I found it a little sadly ironic that my lover was in a time zone six hours ahead, my family was three hours behind, and the ones in the same time zone weren't going to know for a few days. I didn't trust them to not take away from my accomplishment, neither did Ed, which meant they'd have to wait. Hell, they barely knew I'd been in France. They'd get to know once I was finished celebrating with people who would just be happy for me. That pushed a Georgia phone call off to the weekend after the volleyball tournament. Maybe after practice tomorrow if I could get my school lunch bunch to come for drinks, I’d even buy. I had no problem funding my own celebration. I just wanted my friends there. Angie and Eli were coming for the weekend. Maybe I'd call while they were here. Eli could make angry faces while Angie tried to scold him. Then either way it went we could drink our way through. That was a good plan. I texted all involved and they agreed.

I ran back out to the grocery for fresh berries, yogurt, and wine to go with my cheese. I bought other good for detox items and healthy foods. A stopped by a smoothie shop for a raspberry white chocolate protein drink. It was amazing how quickly I slid into my summer schedule. Run to the gym to work out. Run home. Have breakfast and practice guitar. Do whatever until it was warm enough to go lay by the pool and read or float. Have dinner, meet up with friends, volleyball practice, or lay on the couch with Netflix

Sebastian and I would text sporadically throughout the day. About nine my time, so three am for him, I'd send him a picture. One Angie took or something I'd taken during the day. He always woke up to see me. Some days that was more arousing than others. We talked almost every day. Maybe five minutes or an hour. Night shoots were the worst. He was working while I was awake and I was asleep during his time off.

The weekend Angie and Eli came down was fun. Friday night we stayed in watching movies and drinking. Saturday's tournament was going well until storms came through. The radar said there were hours of rain left, so they canceled. Since all our plans had been canceled we decided on a bar crawl. Which meant Sunday was spent recovering. We went to brunch at the riverside restaurant where Sebastian and I had our first date. On the drive back I made plans for calling Georgia. Angie and Eli were my get away plan. We went out on the back patio. I set up my iPad where they would only see me, but I could see my support system.

Dad picked up almost immediately, “Hey, Emma. You’re home. Amy told us you were in France.”

“Sebastian had an event so we made it a short vacation.”

“Sounds fun.” My mom had entered the frame. “I bet you appreciated things you overlooked before.”

I laughed, “I did. All those things I saw pictures of later and wished I’d paid more attention to. We had a good time.”

“That’s great.”

Time to dive in. “I wanted to tell you some good news.”

Amy jumped into frame and interrupted, “Can I hear too?”

I ignored the question and just went on, “I was accepted into a new Doctoral program at NYU. It’s education and digital media. It’s new so we’re building my program as we go.”

“That’s great news, Emma.” Dad looked excited, “Dissertation and everything?”

“Yes, it can be research or designing a project. I’ve got about three years to get that figured out. They accepted the post-grad classes I’ve been taking.”

“Congratulations, sweetheart. We’re proud of you.” Mom’s smile was bright.

“My baby sister is going to be a Doctor. I need to figure out my future.”

I shook my head, “You’ll figure it out. What’s right for you and my beautiful niece. She’s a job and a half.”

“I am not enjoying this age.”

“That’s why I teach first grade and not kindergarten or preschool.”

We talked a bit more about school, what was going on there, and how things were with Amy and Max. Mom asked about Sebastian, where he was, and if things were good between us. Instead of shutting her down, like I had in the car, I talked about him.

Not a minute after we hung up Amy texted, “How’s Sebastian feel about calling you Dr? *wink*wink*”

I sent back, “Exactly, like that.”

I closed my tablet and looked at my friends. I was not comfortable. Sure, the conversation had gone fine, but it didn’t feel fine. “That went better than expected.”

“This time.” Eli grimaced, “Sorry.”

“That’s what makes this so hard. This looks normal, but it’s not. If it was, I wouldn’t have this not in the bit of my stomach and want friends here when I talk to them. That’s not normal.”

Angie came over to kneel beside me, bringing me into a hug, “No, it’s not. You don’t need us when you call Seattle.”

Eli joined us, “I don’t think they know what they’re doing, but it doesn’t change it, Emma.”

I laughed, “I know.” I kissed his cheek. Dealing with my parents was worse for him than it was for me. I hated seeing people I love hurt too. I wasn’t hurt though. It was a weird numb.

“You ok, Em?”

I met Angie’s eyes, “I am. Just weird. The happier I am, the more good things going on, the more distant I feel. The better I’m doing, the less supportive they are.”

“Yep!” Eli didn’t hesitate to agree. “And that’s not alright.”

I mussed his hair, “No, it’s not.”

The next week was more of the same. I registered for my fall classes and my books were delivered by Wednesday. I started reading. Yes, I'm that student. I liked to get a head start. I'd never taken classes in the fall. The first month of teaching was exhausting. It took time and energy to get first graders ready to learn. I wasn't sure how that would work with starting my classes. Getting ahead on reading seemed the safest approach.

Thursday afternoon Sebastian called. Drunk. I guess wrapping in Paris was worthy of a party. The rest of cast and crew were packing up and heading to Rome. Sebastian was flying halfway around the world to San Diego's Comic-Con. He'd spend thirty-two hours of his four day weekend in a plane, which meant he was drunk and a little grumpy. By the time I was done with him he was still drunk, but no longer grumpy. He was naked, smiling, and satisfied. Well, as satisfied as he could be over the phone. Even drunk he was insistent that he not see me masturbating for the first time on video. We should have taken care of this.

I set an alarm for the middle of the night to make sure he was awake and would make his plane. It was worth it to lay in bed together.

[4birds-of-a-feather]

Chapter 27 - Wonder whose arms will hold you good and tight (when it’s exactly twelve o’clock that night) [part 5]

Birds Of a Feather

A bit late because we wanted to update on occasion of Jeff Ament’s birthday but it’s the thought that counts, right? ✨ Hope you’re gonna enjoy this, thanks for your patience!

(In the previous chapters: after Mike has made her reason, Layla has decided to finally do something about her crush on Eddie; Sara has been enjoying Demri’s company but her mood has been ruined by finding Jeff with another girl in what’s been her room for the last weeks; Stone has witnessed the entire scene and, after some failed attempts by Layla, is resolute to make Sara come out from the bathroom where she has locked herself up)

“There you are!” Eddie came up behind Layla’s back as she was chatting with a guy and a girl who told her they were going to be part of the band’s crew during their first actual tour. She had known for a while that the guys were about to leave to play some gigs outside Seattle but somehow she kept thinking about it as something happening in a much more distant future. Talking with the crew members she realized they were going to go to Canada in a little more than a week and, in less than a month, they’d be off to California. She was thinking about Eddie and the fact she’d be missing him and also that she and Sara would probably be back to their own apartment soon. When she heard him call her she got startled because it was like her thoughts materialized right there beside her. She turned around and saw him standing there, holding two glasses of what looked like red wine, lips curled up in a kind of goofy smile “Did I scare you?” “Hehe no, I just didn’t hear you coming” she awkwardly replied and took one of the glasses from his hands. <It’s a party, it’s loud, you’re not supposed to hear anything, you didn’t need to point that out> “Wine! Good idea! Hey Smitty, let’s go get some for the midnight toast as well” the girl told her friend as they exchanged an obvious look. “I’ve been doing toasts with Cready the whole evening, I can’t miss the big one. By the way, where is he?” “No idea, let’s go find him” she dragged him out of the way and left Eddie and Layla alone. “So…” Layla smiled at him and started to talk but didn’t know how to continue and hoped he would say something to fill the however pleasurable silence. “So… what about Sara? Where is she?” Eddie thought that if Layla wasn’t right outside that door anymore then things must have been settled. “Oh. She’s still in there, with Stone. He’s trying to talk her into starting the new year in a room that’s not the bathroom” she shrugged and took a sip. “Stone? And why did you leave it to Stone to solve the mystery?” the singer asked suspiciously, since he knew the two girls were inseparable and Layla sounded weirdly annoyed all of a sudden. For a fleeting moment he thought she could be jealous but immediately laughed at the idea. “He confessed he was the one who made her upset” “It’s Stone’s fault then? It’s always Stone’s fault”  “He told her Scorsese is overrated and you know she’s a little touchy on the movie department” “Ouch! Yeah, hehe, I guessed. So, she likes Coppola and Scorsese too” Eddie tilted his head like he was assigning new interesting information to his memory and drank some wine while the girl stopped right before drinking. “How do you know she likes Coppola?”  “Oh well, ehm, because… because she said it. Not like she told me directly but I think I heard her mentioning him a couple of times”  “I see…” “IT’S ALMOST MIDNIGHT, YOU FUCKERS! GO AND GET YOURSELF SOMEONE AND CHOOSE CAREFULLY WHO YOU WANT TO ENTER THE NEW YEAR WITH!” Cornell turned down the music for a second to yell his announcement, then turned it up straight away. Eddie and Layla turned their heads to watch Chris just like everybody else in the room and, when the music was back on and their eyes met, the awkward silence was back on. “Err, any particular New Year’s Eve’s tradition in France?” Eddie mentally kicked himself as he spoke.  <What the fuck did I just say??> “Oh, well, yeah, there are many traditions for nouvel an” she answered, taken aback by the question. “I’m all ears”  “Well, people usually go to the réveillon, that is the New Year’s Eve party, all dressed up for the special occasion” “And I see you respected the tradition perfectly” the guy was feeling he was making a fool of himself with Layla but couldn’t help it. “Thanks. Mmm and well, to ring in 1991 the French way the wine in our glasses should be sparkly but I prefer red so I can make an exception” “I prefer red too” Eddie was thinking less about the wine he was drinking and more about the color of Layla’s top.  “And, you know, at the stroke of midnight… everybody wish each other a happy new year and kiss” “Lovers kissing at midnight is a tradition that goes beyond borders, I guess” he watched as couples were starting to appear all around them and felt the urge to drink a little more. “But it’s not about lovers only, everybody kisses everybody”  “WHA-” “... On the cheeks” “Ah!” “Hehe, lovers usually s’embrassent sous le gui” Layla added giggling at Eddie’s funny face. “That is…? They kiss… like idiots?” “They kiss under the mistletoe” she explained. “Isn’t that on Christmas?” “In France it’s a New Year’s Eve thing” she drank up what was left of her glass of wine and realized she hadn’t thought about putting any mistletoe branch in the apartment.  <It wouldn’t have made any difference but…> “No mistletoe here though” Eddie said, almost mirroring her thoughts. “And no lovers either. At least, on my part” she sighed as she scanned the living room and noticed people already kissing without the need to wait for midnight or to have mistletoe hanging over their heads. “Same for me” their eyes met again and totally unexpectedly they both burst out laughing at the same time. “We’re such losers” Layla stated as she was catching her breath. “We can always enter the new year kissing each other’s cheek like the losers we are” “Agreed!” Layla and Eddie shook hands “But being losers, we also need more wine to enter 1991 properly” “Your wish is my command, Miss Boulais” he offered her his arm and she gladly took it as they made their way together to the drinks table.

♣♦️♣♦️♣♦️♣♦️♣♦️♣♦️♣♦️♣♦️♣♦️♣♦️♣♦️♣♦️♣♦️♣♦️♣♦️♣♦️♣♦️♣♦️♣♦️♣♦️♣♦️♣♦️♣♦️♣♦️♣♦️

“You’ve been too harsh with Mike, Gossrad… I would have suggested my ex-apartment but the plumbing is fucked up, just like the electrical system and everything else” “No worries, I’m sure he has already charmed one of your neighbors – it’s a quality I envy him, to be honest” the guitarist sighed “C’mon, Sara, let me in” “I wanna be alone, is that such a hard concept to grasp? I hate New Year’s Eve, this is my normal mood for this day” “But you were totally fine before… has something happened to you?” “Well, I’m a great actress whose strongest suit is feigning happiness… now, seriously, nothing has happened: you must leave me alone, please”  He couldn’t see her but the way she had just said that last word struck something within him. “Scirea” “... what did you say?”   “I said Scirea, you fool!” “No, you mangled that word, you big fuckin’ idiot!” the girl almost growled “And that was a low blow, you shouldn’t have said it” “Desperate times call for desperate measures… C’mon, now you have to let me in, you can’t go back on your word” “I can’t believe you still remember it after all these years…” “I know, right? It’s just a code word that forces one of us to do whatever the other one wants, nothing remarkable”  “Just like your pronunciation, genius” she quickly retorted, making Stone snort. “So? What are you waiting for?” “You know you just blew the chance to use it for the rest of the year, right?” “Well, according to my watch I can survive this: it’s a quarter to midnight, after all” “Suit yourself,” Sara declared, finally peeping out from a crack in the door that she had just cautiously opened “but next year I’ll have two free passes to the word and it’s mandatory, ok?” “Deal” he smiled at her and followed her inside the room, then closed the door behind them. 

♣♦️♣♦️♣♦️♣♦️♣♦️♣♦️♣♦️♣♦️♣♦️♣♦️♣♦️♣♦️♣♦️♣♦️♣♦️♣♦️♣♦️♣♦️♣♦️♣♦️♣♦️♣♦️♣♦️♣♦️♣♦️

“Hey, what time is it?” he heard the question as if it was coming from a distant voice but it actually came from the person right beside him. It was probably due to the loud music playing at the party but mostly to the fact that his mind was somewhere else, just like his eyes, which were searching through the crowd in the living room. At some point he looked further ahead through the foil curtain and noticed some kind of commotion near the bathroom. He clearly saw Eddie and Layla leave one after the other. Then the bathroom door opened once again and someone let Stone in. He didn’t see who was inside, but caught a glimpse of a blue silhouette and didn’t like it at all. “Jeff?? Are you deaf?” “Huh?” he immediately came back from his frozen zoned-out state and looked at the blonde right next to him, who was giving him both a perplexed and amused glance “... It’s almost 1991, I guess”

♣♦️♣♦️♣♦️♣♦️♣♦️♣♦️♣♦️♣♦️♣♦️♣♦️♣♦️♣♦️♣♦️♣♦️♣♦️♣♦️♣♦️♣♦️♣♦️♣♦️♣♦️♣♦️♣♦️♣♦️♣♦️

“You know he died, right?” “Who?” Stone shifted in his seat, turning to look at the girl. They were both sitting on the floor, with their backs leaning against the door. “Scirea… last year, in a car accident” “Oh, I didn’t know” “Yeah, you never were a big soccer fan” Sara hugged herself “It’s a pity, he surely deserved much more fame” She then kept on rambling about his fate, what had caused his death, what kind of a job he was doing for Juventus and God knows what else; Stone couldn’t care less about soccer, that was true, but he listened to every single word without interrupting her: if babbling about deceased soccer champions kept her from wallowing in her own misery, he wouldn’t mind spending the next hours listening to her. Not at all. 

♣♦️♣♦️♣♦️♣♦️♣♦️♣♦️♣♦️♣♦️♣♦️♣♦️♣♦️♣♦️♣♦️♣♦️♣♦️♣♦️♣♦️♣♦️♣♦️♣♦️♣♦️♣♦️♣♦️♣♦️♣♦️

“Are you fuckin’ kiddin’ me??” Steve shook his head as he watched Layla and Eddie laugh together straight in front of him; in the meantime, somebody else was sitting near him and singing to himself. “When I was young, I never needed anyone…” “I can’t believe she hasn’t been single in like forever and now that I gave up putting the moves on her she’s fuckin’ single, for fuck’s sake?!” “And making love was just for fun…” “Oh shut up Elias, you’re probably still a virgin!” someone shouted behind the guy, who kept getting more and more dramatic and louder in his solo performance. “Those days are gone…” “And she’s already hooking up with some other guy – I mean, so much for being a devoted girlfriend” “Living alone, I think of all the friends I’ve known…” Elias drunkenly went on and put a hand on Steve’s shoulder. “I’m not your friend, man” “But I’m everything you’ve got left so I wouldn’t be so rude, you know?” Elias retorted really quickly before singing again “When I dial the telephone, nobody’s home” “You don’t even have a phone anymore, Dave said you forgot to pay the bill!” Matt said passing him by.  The red haired guy just gave him the middle finger and screamed at the top of his lungs: “ALL BY MYSEEEEEELF” “Oh, Jesus Christ” Steve facepalmed while everybody in the room looked at Elias and laughed. “DON’T WANNA BE ALL BY MYSELF ANYMORE” “I can’t believe even Lukin scored someone and I’m stuck here with you” he pointed at the couch where his bandmate was busy tongue-wrestling a goth girl. “UH! I LOVE THIS SONG!” Layla yelled out of nowhere and for a second the guitarist thought she was referring to Elias’ rendition but then he realized she meant the song by The Church that had just come up from the big stereo in the living room. She was dragging Eddie towards the center of the room when Elias tapped Steve on his shoulder. “Shall we dance?” he asked with a hiccup. “... I need a fuckin’ drink”

♣♦️♣♦️♣♦️♣♦️♣♦️♣♦️♣♦️♣♦️♣♦️♣♦️♣♦️♣♦️♣♦️♣♦️♣♦️♣♦️♣♦️♣♦️♣♦️♣♦️♣♦️♣♦️♣♦️♣♦️♣♦️

Sometimes, when this place gets kind of empty Sound of their breath fades with the light

“This song…” “It was Layla’s idea, she specifically requested it” “Typical El: she has good taste in music but lacks some ability in the mixtape department… I hope she hasn’t asked you to put on some Dylan or Cohen as well” “Hell, that would spoil the party” “Lambada, on the other hand… no contest, c’mon” Sara exclaimed in a theatrical way, making the guitarist sneer. “Admit it, I brightened your whole evening!” “More like ruined it, champ” “Don’t think you can fool me, missy; I saw you before, when you were rambling on some astrological bullshit with Demri: you were practically grinning from ear to ear” “I told you, I’m a fairly good actress”

I think about the loveless fascination

“Jeez, Sara, is it so hard for you to just admit you were perfectly fine before? And then something happened – and you don’t wanna tell me what it was exactly – and-” he gesticulated, pointing out the bathroom and her “and you ended up here, all alone during New Year’s Eve” “I told ya, this is normal for me… I don’t enjoy New Year’s Eve and hate parties, so put the two together and you end up with my archnemesis” she shrugged, but wasn’t able to meet his gaze. “You’re impossible! I saw you running in here, ok?! I saw you and I’m still doing it right now, when nobody else is giving a shit about you!” he blurted out, and she was taken aback. “What the fuck do you mean?? What, you saw me having a mental breakdown and want me to thank you because you ran here like a knight in shining armor?! Fuck off, Stone! Just what am I supposed to do to make y’all understand you have to leave me alone?! Tell me, what-” the girl stopped because she felt her voice already quivering. <Fuckin’ great, Fancini! Have yourself a good cry, given how it’s been hours since you last cried your eyes out! And do it in front of somebody who probably still appreciated you and now will lose all the respect he had for you! Great fuckin’ job, you outdid yourself> “Hey… hey, it’s ok” he said, putting a hand on her shoulder, but she pulled back. “Nothing’s ok, understood? Nothing! And it’s all because he...” she finally sobbed, her eyes immediately watering like they had wanted to do ever since she had turned that goddamn light on.  <... ever since that July afternoon>

Under the Milky Way tonight

“Forget about him, ok? Let’s not talk about him” the guy kept on babbling. “How… how can you ask me to forget him?” she snapped out of it and recoiled, shooting him a glance full of both desperation and disgust for what he had just said. “Ok, then you don’t have to forget him,” he rolled his eyes, mustering all the patience he could “but we can talk about someone more important – you” “Me? More important? What’s that supposed to mean?”  “It means that you’ll stay silent and I’ll say every single thing that makes you awesome and hopefully you won’t feel like shit anymore” “Then you can cut it out already, there’s nothing you can say that can make me feel better” the girl hid her face between her knees, hugging her legs “And it would only be a waste of time, I haven’t done a single positive thing in years… I’m just tired, I wanna be alone”  

Lower the curtain down on Memphis Lower the curtain down, alright

“You’re so articulate and well-spoken it honestly puts to shame a lot of men who think you aren’t worthy of their time, and somebody should seriously tell ‘em it’s actually them who don’t deserve to waste your time” the guitarist cleared his throat, then resumed speaking without looking at her “The way your mind works… you can have a conversation about everything, there isn’t a single topic you can’t tackle – and yeah, I’m talking about science too: you may have been terrible at it in school, but outside? Whenever the newspaper had a story on the latest scientific discovery, you were always the first of us to know it” He heard her sniffle quietly and took her silence as a sign to keep on going.

I got no time for private consultation

“You’re always unapologetically yourself, for better or worse; you stand up for yourself and the ones you love, but also for people you don’t know at all – hell, you must be the bravest person I know” he heaved a sigh, his eyes never leaving the tile they had been staring at for the past five minutes “You’re a force to be reckoned with, truly you are… and I know you always carry some snacks in your backpack so you can feed stray cats – a shitty person doesn’t do that” At those words the girl raised her head immediately and looked at him with wide eyes: “How…?”

Under the Milky Way tonight

“Five years ago… every time a Queen song came on the radio, I used to think of you and what you might be doing in Florence: were you still attending gigs? Did you speak Italian with an American accent, just like you spoke English with an Italian accent? Did you still fly into a rage if anybody said that Hot Space was a shitty album?” he had ignored her previous question, but now finally found the courage to turn and look her in the eye “Did you still have that half dimple when you smiled all embarrassed? You know that kind of smile, the tight-lipped one”

Wish I knew what you were looking for

“Please, don’t look at me!” Sara immediately turned away, almost shrieking “I’m a monster: I have a runny nose and I’m sure my make-up is all smudged” The guitarist put his hands on her shoulders and made her face him again, then started to wipe her nose with some toilet paper. “... I look like a fucked-up panda, don’t I?” she muttered after a while, finally regaining her voice. “You just have a nose as cute as a button and as red as the one of a certain reindeer, the rest is just like it was before… oops, except for the eyes” “What? What is it?? They’re red, aren’t they?? Fuck, I’m not ready to say goodbye to my reputation as a badas-” “They’re shining, brat” he poked her nose with his index “Crying apparently suits you, but I’d appreciate it if in the future it’ll happen because you’re laughing too much” “Oh, shush” she pouted and shoved him, making him chuckle because avoiding her pushes was becoming increasingly harder but, most of all, because her half dimple had just appeared on the right corner of her mouth.  

Might have known what you would find

After a while Stone was finally able to stop her, taking her hands in his without looking away.  “Ever since I’ve known you, the ending of Chaplin’s City Lights has been able to move me, because before I didn’t understand it… I had never experienced what the Tramp goes through with the flower girl” he sighed and gave her a sad smile, slightly squeezing her hands “I don’t get tired of you the way I get tired of other people”

And it’s something quite peculiar Something shimmering and white

“Stone, what-what are you trying to tell me?” the girl looked quizzically at him but squeezed back his hands. “I don’t know,” he raised a hand to tuck a strand of hair behind her ear “what do you think it is?” 

It leads you here, despite your destination

Neither of them could tell who had been the first one to move, but now Sara was straddling him and he was holding her face in his hands and they were kissing – heavily. She could still hear the song faintly playing in the background, but all she could focus on right now was how Stone had been looking at her, the feeling of his lips against her own and the way he was still holding her, like she was the most precious thing he had ever laid eyes on. She touched his cheek and felt it was smooth, almost boyish (not strong and stubbly as the one she would have liked to stroke), and the realization made her angry; she instinctively proceeded to run her fingers through his hair, eliciting a moan from him, and pictured a pair of hazel eyes behind her eyelids that turned immediately into green ones. She shut her eyes with all her might until all she could see were lazy stars, then dizzily abandoned herself to passion, as if she were living somebody else’s life. 

Under the Milky Way tonight

[365days365movies]

May 9, 2021: A.I. Artificial Intelligence (2001) (Recap: Part One)

Welcome to the future.

At this point, we’ve mostly looked at the past, present, or the near-future (as in, the next ten years, if that). Additionally, we’ve looked either at nonexistent technology in a contemporary setting, or an extension of existing technology taken to a logical next step. But no more. No more realism, no more real-world rules, and nothing that we’re even close to in this reality.

Well...mostly.

That’s genuinely impressive, not gonna lie. Anyway, yeah, from here forwards (for a bit), we’ll be looking at the future and futuristic technology. Now, there are a couple of ways in which these films tend to go. The first big way that we tend to represent the future in film is the same way we always have: flying cars, futuristic technology, smart houses, and robots.

Now, there are countless examples of this future, and it always changes a bit depending on the present. Which, yeah, makes sense. After all, what I’m doing right now, at this moment, would’ve been seen by many people as a massive technological achievement, even around the time that I was born. Which, yes, I’m old, deal with it (because I can’t). Anyway, the way that this begins is with the first major filmed view of a seemingly idyllic future: Fritz Lang’s 1927 film Metropolis.

The overly mechanized (and politically dystopic) society seen in this film, as well as the visuals and technology, would inform our ideas of the future throughout the next century. Multiple themes and common objects reoccur throughout futuristic fiction. You know the stuff I’m talking about. Flying cars, automatic food machines, robotic assistants, video watches, holograms, jetpacks, so on and so forth.

But here’s the thing about the future. It’s always ahead of us, and eventually...well, we’ve gotten to most of those things to some degree. Either they already exist...

...or is currently being developed.

Well, one of them we’re still working on. And the development of more advanced AI is something we have yet to perfect, or even fully develop. However, the development of A.I. (and the consequences of that technology) are ALL OVER science fiction. Sometimes, they’re merely used for flavor to help establish the futuristic setting.

Sometimes, they’re characters with their own agency and conflicts, which may or may not define the plot. In these cases, they’re often simply there to back up the main human characters, and help with their development, and sometimes their own. You know, manic pixie dream robots.

And then, possibly most often, they’re the abject villains of the piece. they can be mysterious alien technology, like in The Day the Earth Stood Still, or a man-made danger that turns on the race that created and/or abused it.

But then, on occasion, an A.I. is given the chance to develop as a character, without being used to define the development of a human character. Sometimes, the question of what life truly means is raised through these characters, and we become attached to them outside of any other character. This isn’t nearly as common as the others, but it’s definitely not unheard of.

And for the record...things don’t often go well for those AIs. But still, some of those characters have quite a lasting impact. So, there’s quite a lot of potential for this type of character, from a dramatic standpoint. And that potential leads us to the guy who made this.

I WILL MAKE A JURASSIC PARK REFERENCE AS OFTEN AS POSSIBLE

Steven Spielberg gives us today’s entry, and this director of a classic science fiction story about science gone awry teamed up with the director of a science fiction film where an artificial intelligence went awry. You know, this thing.

I didn’t forget about HAL. And I won’t forget about him later, either.

Director Stanley Kubrick is pretty well-know for his mind-bending films, especially The Shining and 2001: A Space Odyssey. But he also worked with Spielberg on this film before his death in 1999, as this was one of his dream projects for many years, and the two directors were well-known friends.

And so, eventually, Spielberg was given the reins from Kubrick, and results were...mixed. It’s funny, because I’ve never actually seen this movie, but I remember it through its surprisingly widespread ad campaign. I used to go to NYC as a kid a lot, and there was a massive building-side plastered with the iconic logo of this movie. So, I’ve been hovering around this movie for a long time. Enough navel-gazing!

SPOILERS AHEAD!!!

Recap (Part One)

It is, unsurprisingly, the future. A marrator informs us that climate change has caused the ice caps to melt, and global flooding drowns several countries. You could say that it’s a...Waterworld.

I genuinely considered watching that movie at some point, and then I decided I liked myself to much to watch 2 hours of Kevin Costner’s emotionless acting. Granted, it’s not much better now, listening to the emotionless acting of...

Professor Allen Hobby (William Hurt) is a straight-up sociopath. OK, technically, he’s a robotics engineer, but dude’s making a speech, right? He talks about how far robots have come, dissing my boi Deep Blue in the process, and notes that pain-memory response can also be demonstrated by robots. He proves this by stabbing a woman in his audience, like RIGHT through the hand. Jesus, man! Why the hell would you do that?

Oh. Holy shit, I got fooled. Advanced technology indeed. But OK, so Sheila’s a robot, and a very advanced one...to us. But Hobby wants more, and proposes to his workers to make a robot that can really TRULY love. And through love may come a true subconscious, which means making a robot that can dream. And what better robot to make than a robot child? After all, all child conception requires a license in this futuristic world, so many childless couples are yearning for a child.

Which is why, twenty months later, the first robot child is offered to Henry and Monica Swinton (Sam Robards and Frances O’Connor), a couple...with a child. Um. Guys. You JUST SAID that there are legit childless couples who need a child, and those people would be best suited to love that robot child back (a VERY GOOD question raised by one of Hobby’s subordinates). So why give it to a couple whose son is still alive? Yeah, he’s got a rare disease that they don’t have a cure for yet, and is currently in cryostasis, BUT THEY HAVE A KID! Surely, that’s going to be a potential emotional conflict! And what if the kid wakes up or some shit? This is a TERRIBLE goddamn idea. Think this shit through, guys.

And yet...

This is David (Haley Joel Osment), Cybertronics’ first child robot, brought home by Henry to essentially replace their son. Which is AMAZINGLY FUCKING TONE-DEAF AND INSANE, GODDAMN. That’s extraordinarily messed up. And, for the record, I totally get what Spielberg’s going for, but Jesus Christ, man. This was a terrible way to go about this. And it gets fucking WORSE.

See, Henry (who actually works for Cybertronics) tells Monica that, once they sign the papers and complete the updates, David will imprint on them and see him as their true parents, loving them unconditionally. Which...yeah, fuck, that’s an entire DUMP TRUCK of ethics issues right there. And, while we’re at it, David is...creepy as shit. I mean it, dude, Haley Joel Osment is a VERY good child actor, but he’s laying on the creepy robot child thing THICK. And yeah, this is BEFORE he imprints on them. Jesus fuck, man, there’s a scene where the still uncomfortable Monica is outside of a glass door, and he looks back at her THROUGH THE DOOR like a goddamn SERIAL KILLER.

And I gotta tell ya, dude does not lay off that creepy-ass dial one iota. And for that matter, the music by John Williams ISN’T FUCKING HELPING. LISTEN to this shit, and imagine a robot child that you don’t know wandering around your house. It’s amazingly fucking creepy.

AND IT JUST. KEEPS. GETTING. WORSE. There’s a scene where they’re all at dinner, right, and David’s just staring at them as they eat, mimicking their actions. After all, he’s a robot, he can’t actually eat or drink anything because of his internal working. And then, out of FUCKING NOWHERE, he starts laughing like the FUCKING JOKER, and it scares the EVER-LOVING SHIT OUT OF ME. And somehow, they laugh alongside him, in the never-ending Stockholm syndrome that is this movie! And as soon as its over, he just STOPS laughing, spontaneously. Fuck me, man, I’m tempted to stop watching here and now, and I’m only TWENTY MINUTES IN! I need a fucking break.

And after that...OF COURSE she decides to activate his imprinting protocols to make him, let me remind you, LOVE HIM FOREVER! She reads out a series of words, and after “FREIGHT CAR”, he knows his mission is to kill the Prime Minister of Sokovia. But first, he’ll settle down and love Monica unconditionally (again, FOREVER), calling her Mommy and making me shit my pants in fear. IT WASN’T ME, IT WAS FUCKING DAVID

Oh, and by the way, isn’t it kinda shitty to do that without Henry being involved AT ALL? Like, cool, he has unconditional maternal love, but Henry wasn’t a part of that conditioning at all! And he still refers to him as “Henry” instead of Dad! However, Henry definitely doesn’t care about that, because he still sees David as only a robot. Hey, guys, maybe using these two as your first experiment with a robot child WAS A TERRIBLE FUCKING IDEA, YOU IDIOTS! No wonder William Hurt was cast as Thunderbolt Ross in the MCU. Already shown he can play a character with shitty ideas before.

Anyway, after this terrible series of events, David prevents the parents from leaving one night due to his childlike antics. When Monica goes to comfort him, he asks how long she’ll live, and tells her that he hope she never dies, a COMPLETELY NORMAL THING TO SAY. Look, I get that he’s a robot, but only a goddamn emotionless sociopath would program emotional responses like this into a robot. Which, given what we’ve seen of Hobby, makes sense.

In response, she gives him Teddy (Jack Angel), a technologically advanced teddy bear with sentience, a personality, and the voice of Astrotrain from The Transformers TV series. Because, yes, I am THAT MUCH of a goddamn nerd.

Soon after, the house gets a phone call, which David receives...literally. He takes the phone and allows it to speak through him. It turns out that, shock beyond shocks, THEIR SON IS CURED! Yeah, fuck. Maybe giving David to a family with a STILL LIVING SON is a fucking ABSOLUTELY TERRIBLE IDEA, for about a thousand reasons.

And, fucking understandably, Martin Swinton (Jake Thomas) is a little upset to find out that he’s essentially been replaced by a robot kid. Although, to be fair, he’s also kind of a dick to David, holding his humanity over him and treating him as a toy that he attempts to manipulate and bully. My Lord, this is a massively stupid idea. And Martin immediately shows his dickishness by asking his mother to read Carlo Collodi’s The Adventures of Pinocchio to them. Which is meant to be a punishment for Pinocchio. However, of course, David loves it.

Still, however, there’s trouble in paradise for David, as he tries to compete with Martin for being a real boy, and eats spinach at dinner one evening. Despite Teddy’s mildly ominous warning to him (”YOU WILL BREAK”), he keeps eating until he basically has a stroke and breaks, forcing him to be repaired by some of Cybertronics’ technicians. Monica has a bit of a break down as a result, which Martin notices. This causes Martin to go pure supervillain, manipulating David to do creepy things in order to insert doubt into Monica about David. Jesus, Martin’s a creepy kid, too. No wonder Monica grew to be cool with David, her actual son is a FUCKING SOCIOPATHIC MONSTER! Are there ANY truly normal people in this world? IS THIS WHAT THE FUTURE IS?

Martin convinces David to cut a lock of Monica’s hair while she’s sleeping. And lemme tell ya, a little boy holding scissors over someone while they sleep is not exactly comforting. Henry agrees, and after stopping him, believes that they need to return him. Monica disagrees, knowing that they’ll destroy him if brought back. But David, ever the semi-sociopath himself, ignores any signs of humanity in David and dismisses Monica's feelings for him entirely. He also says this thing about “IF HE CAN BE PROGRAMMED TO LOVE, CAN NOT HE BE PROGRAMM-ED TO HATE?”, which...no. No, he cannot. He didn’t learn to love, he was programmed to. And, again, that’s ethically FUCKED, but taking that into account...no. HE WASN’T PROGRAMMED TO HATE, HENRY. Goddamn, buddy, use your head here.

It’s Martin’s birthday, and his friends at the pool party expose David to the fun world of anti-robot (or Mecha) racism, and test to see if he has Damage Avoidance Systems by threatening him with a knife. And he does. Buuut, when those systems kick in, he goes to the nearest point of safety to keep himself safe. That point is, unfortunately, Martin, whom he gets behind...and accidentally drags into the pool.

Thing is, because of Martin’s recent illness, he can’t exactly swim, meaning that David almost drowns him. When Henry and other partygoers go to save him, they abandon David in the pool completely. And now, David’s fucked. Because although this situation isn’t even a little bit his fault, he also just nearly killed Martin. And so, after seeing notes that he’s been writing to her, Monica offers to take for a “ride in the country”. Which definitely means something good. In reality, she’s planning on taking him back to Cybertronics. But once in the car, there’s a change in plans. And hear me out...it’s arguably far more horrifying.

She decides to abandon him in the woods completely, despite how hard it is for her to leave him. She’s sparing him from death, sure, but also throwing him into a world he doesn’t understand, and for reasons that he doesn’t understand. It’s genuinely terrible. And then...yeah, she leaves him forever, to an uncertain future.

End Act One.

I think this is a good place to stop. It’s early, and I need more coffee to handle this shit. See you in Part Two. Of Three. Yup. It’s a long one.

[taylorswifthongkong]

Aaron Dessner confirms: folklore is Taylor Swift’s goth record. Or, at least, it’s her most gothic record. It’s also a few other things, depending on your mood: an unofficial Big Red MachineDessner and Bon Iver’s Justin Vernon started Big Red Machine in 2008 as a loose musical collaboration. They released their official self-titled debut LP in 2018, and this year released “No Time For Love Like Now” with Michael Stipe. collaboration (Big RED Machine); a spiritual companion to The National’s 2019 album I Am Easy To Find, specifically its accompanying Mike Mills film, also shot in black-and-white and emphasizing a more natural setting; or just Swift’s attempt at a headphone record, one that, even if you don’t buy into the Taylor Swift mythology, rewards multiple listens as you pick up on all the intricacies of each song and realize wow, this is where the In Rainbows influence comes in. Dessner is the one to thank for all these little details.

The National multi-instrumentalist spoke to Vulture over the phone from upstate New York a few hours after the surprise release of Swift’s eighth studio album. (“A pretty wild ride,” he admits, sounding tired yet happy.) He was clear that he can’t speak on behalf of Swift’s lyrics, much like he can’t for The National frontman Matt Berninger’s either, or the thinking behind Jack Antonoff’s songs. (Here’s a cheat sheet: Jack’s songs soar, Aaron’s glide.) But Dessner was game to speak to his specific contributions, influences, and own interpretations of each song on folklore, a record you can sum up by two words that came up often during our conversation: nostalgic and wry.

“the 1″

“the 1” and “hoax,” the first song and the last song, were the last songs we did. The album was sort of finished before that. We thought it was complete, but Taylor then went back into the folder of ideasMany of Dessner’s songs started from him sending files of sketches from a folder of ideas to Swift, who then replied with updated files of her ideas and additions. Swift also would start some songs by sending voice memos to Dessner, who would then flesh them out or write music to it. Dessner would also send files to his brother, Bryce, and other collaborators to flesh out the music; he sums up the process as “sending files around.” that I had shared. I think in a way, she didn’t realize she was writing for this album or a future something. She wrote “the 1,” and then she wrote “hoax” a couple of hours later and sent them in the middle of the night. When I woke up in the morning, I wrote her before she woke up in LA and said, “These have to be on the record.” She woke up and said, “I agree” [laughs] These are the bookends, you know?

It’s clear that “the 1” is not written from her perspective. It’s written from another friend’s perspective. There’s an emotional wryness and rawness, while also to this kind of wink in her eyes. There’s a little bit of her sense of humor in there, in addition to this kind of sadness that exists both underneath and on the surface. I enjoy that about her writing.

The song [began from] the voice memo she sent me, and then I worked on the music some and we tracked her vocals, and then my brotherOn bringing in fellow The National member, Bryce Dessner: “My brother lives in France and that’s where he and his family were in lockdown. I would send songs to Bryce for him to add orchestration, and then he would send them back. He would compose to them and then I would have people record them over here remotely.” added orchestration. There are a few other little bits, but basically that was one of the very last things we did.

THE MEANING OF FOLKLORE

We didn’t talk about it at first. It was only after writing six or seven songs, basically when I thought my writing was done, when we got on the phone and said, “OK, I think we’re making an album. I have these six other ideas that I love with Jack [Antonoff] that we’ve already done, and I think what we’ve done fits really well with them.” It’s sort of these narratives, these folkloric songs, with characters that interweave and are written from different perspectives. She had a vision, and it was connecting back in some way to the folk tradition, but obviously not entirely sonically. It’s more about the narrative aspect of it.

I think it’s this sort of nostalgia and wistfulness that is in a lot of the songs. A lot of them have this kind of longing for looking back on things that have happened in your life, in your friend’s life, or another loved one’s life, and the kind of storytelling around that. That was clear to her. But then we kept going, and more and more songs happened.

It was a very organic process where [meaning] wasn’t something that we really discussed. It just kind of would happen where she would dive back into the folder and find other things that were inspiring. Or she and William BoweryDessner explains of the one unknown name who pops up in the folklore credits: “William Bowery is who she wrote ‘exile’ with, and ‘betty.’ He’s a singer-songwriter.” would write “exile,” and then that happened. There were different stages of the process.

Okay, but is it A24-core? [Laughs.] Good comparison.

“cardigan’”

That’s the first song we wrote [in early May]. After Taylor asked if I would be interested in writing with her remotelyOn folklore being recorded somewhat on-the-fly: “I prefer records when they have an element where the paint is still wet. We’re allowing some paint to be human and raw, so [collaborations were] not hired out too much. That was important to me, and that was important to her, too. That is definitely different from her past records.” and working on songs, I said, “Are you interested in a certain kind of sound?” She said, “I’m just interested in what you do and what you’re up to. Just send anything, literally anything, it could be the weirdest thing you’ve ever done,” so I sent a folder of stuff I had done that I was really excited about recently. “cardigan” was one of those sketches; it was originally called “Maple.” It was basically exactly what it is on the record, except we added orchestration later that my brother wrote.

I sent [the file] at 9 p.m., and around 2 a.m. or something, there was “cardigan,” fully written. That’s when I realized something crazy was happening. She just dialed directly into the heart of the music and wrote an incredible song and fully conceived of it and then kept going. It harkens back to lessons learned, or experiences in your youth, in a really beautiful way and this sense of longing and sadness, but ultimately, it’s cathartic. I thought it was a perfect match for the music, and how her voice feels. It was kind of a guide. It had these lower register parts, and I think we both realized that this was a bit of a lightning rod for a lot of the rest of the record.

THE NATIONAL’S INFLUENCE ON SWIFT:

She said that she’s a fan of the emotion that’s conveyed in our music. She doesn’t often get to work with music that is so raw and emotional, or melodic and emotional, at the same time. When I sent her the folder, that was one of the main feelings. She said, “What the fuck? How do you just have that?” [laughs] I was humbled and honored because she just said, “It’s a gift, and I want to write to all of this.” She didn’t write to all of it, but a lot of it, and relatively quickly.

She is a fan of the band, and she’s a fan of Big Red Machine. She’s well aware of the sentiment of it and what I do, but she didn’t ask for a certain kind of thing. I know that the film [I Am Easy To Find] has really affected her, and she’s very much in love with that film and the record. Maybe it’s subconsciously been an influence.

“the last great american dynasty”

I wrote that after we’d been working for a while. It was an attempt to write something attractive, more uptempo and kind of pushing. I also was interested in this almost In Rainbows-style latticework of electric guitars. They come in and sort of pull you along, kind of reminiscent of Big Red Machine. It was very much in this sound world that I’ve been playing around with, and she immediately clicked with that. Initially I was imagining these dreamlike distant electric guitars and electronics but with an element of folk. There’s a lot going on in that sense. I sent it before I went on a run, and when I got back from the run, that song was thereJust how fast of a songwriter is Taylor? Dessner marvels, “It’s almost like a song would come out like a lightning bolt. It’s exhilarating. The shared focus, the clarity of her ideas, and the way she structures things, it’s all there. But I think she works really hard when she’s working, and then she tweaks. She keeps going, so sometimes things would evolve or change. By the time she actually sings it, she’s really inside of it. She doesn’t do very many vocal takes before she nails it.” [laughs].

She told me the story behind it, which sort of recounts the narrative of Rebekah Harkness, whom people actually called Betty. She was married to the heir of Standard Oil fortune, married into the Harkness family, and they bought this house in Rhode Island up on a cliff. It’s kind of the story of this woman and the outrageous parties she threw. She was infamous for not fitting in, entirely, in society; that story, at the end, becomes personal. Eventually, Taylor bought that house. I think that is symptomatic of folklore, this type of narrative song. We didn’t do very much to that either.

“exile” (ft. Bon Iver)

Taylor and William Bowery, the singer-songwriter, wrote that song initially together and sent it to me as a sort of a rough demo where Taylor was singing both the male and female parts. It’s supposed to be a dialogue between two lovers. I interpreted that and built the song, played the piano, and built around that template. We recorded Taylor’s vocals with her singing her parts but also the male parts.

We talked a lot about who she thought would be perfect to sing, and we kept coming back to Justin [Vernon]. Obviously, he’s a dear friend of mine and collaboratorSo, is folklore secretly a new Big Red Machine album? Dessner coyly offers, “I mean, you might not be far off the truth there, but I think I won’t say more.”. I said, “Well, if he’s inspired by the song, he’ll do it, and if not, he won’t.” I sent it to him and said, “No pressure at all, literally no pressure, but how do you feel about this?” He said, “Wow.” He wrote some parts into it also, and we went back and forth a little bit, but it felt like an incredibly natural and safe collaboration between friends. It didn’t feel like getting a guest star or whatever. It was just like, well, we’re working on something, and obviously he’s crazy talented, but it just felt right. I think they both put so much raw emotion into it. It’s like a surface bubbling. It’s believable, you know? You believe that they’re having this intense dialogue.

With other people I had to be secretive, but with Justin, because he was going to sing, I actually did send him a version of the song with her vocals and told him what I was up to. He was like, “Whoa! Awesome!” But he’s been involved in so many big collaborative things that he wasn’t interested in it from that point of view. It’s more because he loved the song and he thought he could do something with it that would add something.

“my tears ricochet”

This is one of my absolute favorite songs on the record. I think it’s a brilliant composition, and Taylor’s words, the way her voice sounds and how this song feels, are, to me, one of the critical pieces. It’s lodged in my brain. That’s also very important to Taylor and Jack. It’s like a beacon for this record.

“mirrorball”

“mirrorball” is, to me, a hazy sort of beautiful. It almost reminds me of ‘90s-era Cardigans, or something like Mazzy Star. It has this kind of glow and haze. It feels really good before “seven,” which becomes very wistful and nostalgic. There are just such iconic images in the lyrics [“Spinning in my highest heels”], which aren’t coming to me at the moment because my brain is not working [laughs].

HOW JACK ANTONOFF’S FOLKORE SONGS DIFFER FROM DESSNER’S

I think we have different styles, and we weren’t making them together or in the same room. We both could probably come closer together in a sense that weirdly works. It’s like an archipelago, and each song is an island, but it’s all related. Taylor obviously binds it all together. And I think Jack, if he was working with orchestrations, there’s an emotional quality to his songs that’s clearly in the same world as mine.

We actually didn’t have a moodboard for the album at all. I don’t think that way. I don’t really know if she does either. I don’t think Jack … well, Jack might, but when I say the Cardigans or Mazzy Star, those aren’t Jack’s words about “mirrorball,” it’s just what calls to mind for me. Mainly she talked about emotion and to lean into it, the nostalgia and wistfulness, and the kind of raw, meditative emotion that I often kind of inhabit that I think felt very much where her heart was. We didn’t shy away from that.

“seven”

This is the second song we wrote. It’s kind of looking back at childhood and those childhood feelings, recounting memories and memorializing them. It’s this beautiful folk song. It has one of the most important lines on the record: “And just like a folk song, our love will be passed on.” That’s what this album is doing. It’s passing down. It’s memorializing love, childhood, and memories. It’s a folkloric way of processing.

“august”

This is maybe the closest thing to a pop song. It gets loud. It has this shimmering summer haze to it. It’s kind of like coming out of “seven” where you have this image of her in the swing and she’s seven years old, and then in “august” I think it feels like fast-forwarding to now. That’s an interesting contrast. I think it’s just a breezy, sort of intoxicating feeling.

“this is me trying”

“this is me trying,” to me, relates to the entire album. Maybe I’m reading into it too much from my own perspective, but [I think of] the whole album as an exercise and working through these stories, whether personal or old through someone else’s perspective. It’s connecting a lot of things. But I love the feeling in it and the production that Jack did. It has this lazy swagger.

“illicit affairs”

This feels like one of the real folk songs on the record, a sharp-witted narrative folk song. It just shows her versatility and her power as a songwriter, the sharpness of her writing. It’s a great song.

“invisible string”

That was another one where it was music that I’d been playing for a couple of months and sort of humming along to her. It felt like one of the songs that pulls you along. Just playing it on one guitar, it has this emotional locomotion in it, a meditative finger-picking pattern that I really gravitate to. It’s played on this rubber bridge that my friend put on [the guitar] and it deadens the strings so that it sounds old. The core of it sounds like a folk song.

It’s also kind of a sneaky pop song, because of the beat that comes in. She knew that there was something coming because she said, “You know, I love this and I’m hearing something already.” And then she said, “This will change the story,” this beautiful and direct kind of recounting of a relationship in its origin.

“mad woman”

That might be the most scathing song on folklore. It has a darkness that I think is cathartic, sort of witch-hunting and gaslighting and maybe bullying. Sometimes you become the person people try to pin you into a corner to be, which is not really fair. But again, don’t quote me on that [laughs], I just have my own interpretation. It’s one of the biggest releases on the album to me. It has this very sharp tone to it, but sort of in gothic folklore. It’s this record’s goth song.

“epiphany”

For “epiphany,” she did have this idea of a beautiful drone, or a very cinematic sort of widescreen song, where it’s not a lot of accents but more like a sea to bathe in. A stillness, in a sense. I first made this crazy drone which starts the song, and it’s there the whole time. It’s lots of different instruments played and then slowed down and reversed. It created this giant stack of harmony, which is so giant that it was kind of hard to manage, sonically, but it was very beautiful to get lost in. And then I played the piano to it, and it almost felt classical or something, those suspended chords.

I think she just heard it, and instantly, this song came to her, which is really an important one. It’s partially the story of her grandfather, who was a soldier, and partially then a story about a nurse in modern times. I don’t know if this is how she did it, but to me, it’s like a nurse, doctor, or medical professional, where med school doesn’t fully prepare you for seeing someone pass away or just the difficult emotional things that you’ll encounter in your job. In the past, heroes were just soldiers. Now they’re also medical professionals. To me, that’s the underlying mission of the song. There are some things that you see that are hard to talk about. You can’t talk about it. You just bear witness to them. But there’s something else incredibly soothing and comforting about this song. To me, it’s this Icelandic kind of feel, almost classical. My brother did really beautiful orchestration of it.

“betty”

This one Taylor and William wrote, and then both Jack and I worked on it. We all kind of passed it around. This is the one where Taylor wanted a reference. She wanted it to have an early Bob Dylan, sort of a Freewheelin’ Bob DylanBob Dylan’s second LP, released in 1963, features some of his most stripped-down acoustic folk songs, with plenty of harmonica. To this day, its lyrics still cause debate. The album’s famous cover, shot in New York on Jones St., is one block away from Cornelia Street. feel. We pushed it a little more towards John Wesley Harding, since it has some drums. It’s this epic narrative folk song where it tells us a long story and connects back to “cardigan.” It starts to connect dots and I think it’s a beautifully written folk song.

Is ‘betty” queer canon?

I can’t speak to what it’s about. I have my own ideas. I also know where Taylor’s heart is, and I think that’s great anytime a song takes on greater meaning for anyone.

Is William Bowery secretly Joe Alwyn?

I don’t know. We’re close, but she won’t tell me that. I think it’s actually someone else, but it’s good to have some mysteries.

“peace”

I wrote this, and Justin provided the pulse. We trade ideas all the time and he made a folder, and there was a pulse in there that I wrote these basslines to. In the other parts of the composition, I did it to Justin’s pulse. Taylor heard this sketch and she wrote the song. It reminds me of Joni Mitchell, in a way — there’s this really powerful and emotional love song, even the impressionistic, almost jazz-like bridge, and she weaves it perfectly together. This is one of my favorites, for sure. But the truth is that the music, that way of playing with harmonized basslines, is something that probably comes a little bit from me being inspired by how Justin does that sometimes. There’s probably a connection there. We didn’t talk too much about it [laughs].

“hoax”

This is a big departure. I think she said to me, “Don’t try to give it any other space other than what feels natural to you.” If you leave me in a room with a piano, I might play something like this. I take a lot of comfort in this. I think I imagined her playing this and singing it. After writing all these songs, this one felt the most emotional and, in a way, the rawest. It is one of my favorites. There’s sadness, but it’s a kind of hopeful sadness. It’s a recognition that you take on the burden of your partners, your loved ones, and their ups and downs. That’s both “peace” and “hoax” to me. That’s part of how I feel about those songs because I think that’s life. There’s a reality, the gravity or an understanding of the human condition.

DOES TAYLOR EXPLAIN HER LYRICS?

She would always talk about it. The narrative is essential, and kind of what it’s all about. We’d always talk about that upfront and saying that would guide me with the music. But again, she is operating at many levels where there are connections between all of these songs, or many of them are interrelated in the characters that reappear. There are threads. I think that sometimes she would point it out entirely, but I would start to see these patterns. It’s cool when you see someone’s mind working.

“the lakes”

That’s a Jack song. It’s a beautiful kind of garden, or like you’re lost in a beautiful garden. There’s a kind of Greek poetry to it. Tragic poetry, I guess.

source

[kaleidescope-writes]

Heart of Audrilluria- Chapter XII; Argued Risk

Modern Fairytale AU

Prince!Tom Hiddleston x Thief! Reader

Warning!: Language, Angst, Sisterly fight

Please read the Author’s Note.

The sound of the door opening made Amelie look up from the papers in her hands. It was early in the morning, the sun had risen a half an hour ago and the younger sister was already hard at work, going over the information they’d gathered in secret. They’d already come up with a plan, but she wanted to make sure all the information and details in their notes applied to it. Everything had to be perfect. If anything went wrong, even slightly, the entire plan would go up in flames. Hopefully, not in the literal sense.

Y/N walked out of her room, hair a mess, nightwear still on, and squinting as she tried to get used to the light in the main room. “Morning sleeping beauty,” Amelie greeted, “Have a nice day yesterday?” Y/N walked around the loveseat, sitting in the armrest and focusing on her sister on the other side. “You could say that,” she replied bluntly. Not sparing a look at Amelie, she leaned towards the center table and took a few of the papers Amelie was looking at. “What are we looking for,” she asked, turning her attention to the information on the pages. Amelie looked at her sister in bewilderment. She completely changed the topic. Something was off. “Ok, what’s up?” Amelie asked, intent on finding out what was bothering Y/N. “Nothing,” Y/N lied, still focused on the papers in her hands. “You’re lying,” Amelie insisted, “I know that behavior. Something happened yesterday and it’s bugging you. Tell me or I’ll beat it out of you.” Y/N looked up from her papers, fully intending to deny Amelie’s allegations. Her words were cut off before they sounded through the room. “Before you think about lying,”  Amelie interrupted, “Just remember I know where you sleep.” 

“Your threats don’t really mean much when there’s nothing wrong.” Y/N maintained. All things considered, it’d be more convenient if she denied anything ever happening. That’s what she planned. Amelie let the papers in her hands drop to her lap and turned to glare at Y/N. So this is how it would go. They rarely disagreed with each other. Most of the time, they had a common goal that would prevent it from happening. It was rare when they would argue, but when they did, it was most likely about something to do with the job. This was no different. Amelie had a hunch it had something to do with Thomas, but she wasn’t sure what. They needed to talk about this before it affected the plan.

“You won’t tell me?” Amelie asked, fixing her posture as she spoke. Still refusing to give her any attention, Y/N sunk further into the seat. “There’s nothing to tell,” she replied simply, lifting the papers slightly in an attempt to cover her sister’s glare. “You and I both know that’s not true,” Amelie argued, “Tell me.” Y/N lowered the papers, daring to look at Amelie’s unfaltering glare. “Nothing happened. You’re being paranoid.” Y/N tried, her eyes fixing on Amelie’s eyebrows to not look away while not looking at her in the eye. They both knew Y/N had certain tendencies that told she was lying. She couldn’t look at Amelie in the eye when she lied. Looking at her eyebrows was the next best thing that wouldn’t raise suspicion. Amelie, however, still wasn’t having it. 

“I’ve known you for years. We’re a year apart and know absolutely everything about each other. I can tell when you’re lying. So you can either tell me what’s going on or I ask loverboy.” Amelie threatened, glaring daggers into her eyes. Y/N sighed, understanding the predicament she was currently in. As much as she didn’t want to tell her, she couldn’t risk Amelie going to speak to Thomas herself. She looked away from Amelie’s face, pondering how to begin the conversation that would end in an argument. It was inevitable. 

Ignoring the screams from the little voice of her conscious, Y/N began, “We talked yesterday. I tried to push him away. I tried to convince him he didn’t want to be with me.” Amelie’s expression changed, “So what happened.” Letting herself slump into the chair in defeat, she continued, “He told me all these things. Things I’ve heard from others before, but never this sincere. He said he wanted to be with me. That’s all he wants.” Amelie looked to the ground, straightening her posture in the chair. “What did you say?” she asked, a distracted tone enveloped her words. She knew this was risky territory. “I..” Y/N stuttered, a subtle tear hiding in her left eye. Taking in a breath, she prepared to give her sister the truth, “I told him I felt the same.” 

Amelie stood suddenly from her seat. She began to pace behind the couch. Arms crossed, she looked at anything but Y/N. “I told him that I felt the same, but I wasn’t going to stay.” Y/N snaps. Amelie stopped mid-step, still not looking in her direction, but encouraging her to continue. “I told him I was going to leave after the coronation. I said I was going back home and everything was going back to normal,” she finished. Amelie turned her body to look at the, now tear-stained face, of her regretful sister. She couldn’t think of anything to say. She felt irritated, betrayed, and disappointed. Y/N confessed her feelings for him. That put them in a difficult situation. What if he decided to follow her? What if he began to investigate her? What if he decided to call their “father” and ask for a blessing? What if this was their downfall? 

“Did you not think about what would happen?” Amelie shouted, “Did it not cross your mind that maybe this is what would make us get caught?” Y/N stood from her seat, the papers from her lap falling to the floor. “I wasn’t thinking,” she cried. “That's the problem,” Amelie snapped. “You weren’t thinking when you kissed him! You weren’t thinking when you let him get close! And you certainly weren’t thinking when you confessed to him! When do you ever think?”   

“Stop! Just shut up for a second!” Y/N lamented. “I fucked up, I know that now. But we can’t do much about it. I didn’t want to get this close, but he just kept pushing. I’m sorry I wasn’t strong enough to push him harder. I’m sorry I got lost in what I felt. I’m sorry I fell for the one person that was completely off-limits. I’m sorry I felt something other than determination for the very first time.” Amelie looked at her toes, slouching her shoulders while keeping her arms crossed. “The job is at risk,” Y/N continued, “But we can still get it done.” 

Amelie let her arms go and sighed deeply. She slid down to the floor and sat cross-legged, her hands holding on to her ankles. Y/N sighed, approaching her and kneeling in front of her. She put her hand on Amelie’s shoulder, searching for her eyes. “You want to insult me,” she asked gently as Amelie slowly met her eyes. “Where’s the fun in that when you’re expecting it?” Amelie laughed softly. Y/N tilted her head and offered her a smile, “You can still try.” Amelie rolled her eyes, adjusting her posture. “You’re a pain in the ass and I’m constantly wondering how we came from the same person,” she said in a calm voice. Y/N’s smile widened and she began to chuckle lightly. 

They sat in comfortable silence for a few minutes before Amelie perked up abruptly. “This can still work.” She stated. Y/N raised her eyebrow, urging her to continue. “You can use this to your advantage. We know the secured room is on the same floor as the balcony he took you to. If you can find a way to be there at the right time, the plan could still work.” she concluded, keeping the same tone as earlier. Y/N looked slightly concerned at the thought. “All you have to do,” Amelie continued, “Is not get attached.”

~~~~~~

A/N:.......So let’s chat. The past few days have been a bit hectic. Between disinfecting the house, keeping track of what we have and need to buy, and dealing with school work and an uneven sleeping schedule, it’s been a rough week. BUT I am back and will continue to post chapters regularly. I might space out the last few chapters a bit for suspense purposes but apart from that, everything will go back to normal. Also, if you want updates or to be added into the masterlist for the upcoming works, please let me know as I am building it before the series’ begin i can’t grammar today. Anyway, I love you guys so much!! Thank you for continuing to support me and I hope you are doing well! Thank you for the lovely comments and messages you guys send me, I can’t tell you how much it means to me💖💖💖💖. As always, feel free to leave me any feedback or questions you may have about anything, seriously anything, and I will respond ASAP. I love you all and please stay safe out there!!! 

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[currentfandomkick]

Bio! Dad Strange Part 5

Some paris update again with more Rogue shenanigans. Heads up, this is more a ‘i decided everyone can be complex and get along somewhat so im altering character dynamics from cannon to my prefrence’

When Marinette and Max and Nino ended up in Chloe’s class the trio made a simple pack on sight—aviod her at all costs.

Why?

Max is fairly certain Marinette is some type of meta. Fairly. She’s still the only person on his level close to his age, so he isnt saying anything.

Nino doesnt share this suspicion, but she’s close with Sabrina, who’s dad keeps checking in on him and Marinette’s family way more than the other stidents at Dupont. Nino doesnt like this, and by proxy, Chloe is horrible.

Marinette thinks Chloe and Sabrina could out her and aviods them to prevent this.

Their teacher sees this and decides to ignore the mandate to keep Max and Marinette And Chloe and Sabrina as science partners in every situation by switching things up.

Max hates working with Chloe—she keeps foddling and talking about fashion when its chemistry class. Focus on the lesson you heathen

Marinette works well with Sabrina (both organized) but she is extremely uncomfortabke with this as Raincomprix starts asking her for help on cases out in the open. Woth science and she has to fake not knowing about them. He takes forever to catch on that her mom doesnt know, and would be pissed if she knew.

Raincomprix then uses his daughter as an inbetween for his and marinette’s joint ‘solve the coldcase’ game. Sabrina gets involved to practice english and science, and finds out she’s good at finding overlooked clues.

As you can guess, this leads to Sabrina and Chloe joining the group.

Marinette and chloe talk fashion sometimes, Chloe critics her color pallettes and stitches. Also her choice to use rogues as inspiration becuase “arent they bad guys?”

“Eh? I think theyre just bad at getting the help they need.”

“Didnt joker kill people?”

“That was mostly mr. J. Easy mistake.”

“...okay...”

This curbs a decent amount of Chloe’s bullyign early on. Chloe is not borderline meta in this, just fixated on fashion to an insane degree—she knows everything about all aspects of the industry but cant design from scratch. Her mom looks down on her for this.

Chloe is also how the group know of ‘adrikins’ who is her prince and will marry her someday or be her forever family, uncertain which.

Alix gets along well with chloe as she needs someone to be salty with when Kim is being an idiot and Marinette is too nice and it goes over Max’s head and Nino is... there is some doubt if he’s scared of Kim or just really respects him.

Sabrina and Max cannot be left alone under any circumstances though. They will try to outsmart each other. Sabrina via legal things, Max via facts and trivia. Marinette is used as their buffer, much to her frustration as she does have designing to do guys!

Kim is showing signs of a crush. Marinette has not noticed as has a secret identity to keep, rogue family to manage from another country, other people’s secret identites to keep (she blames Tim.) so many languages to learn and practice and to top it off, friends to keep from killing each other during school. She has a lot on her plate, ok?

So that summer was more rogue sheneigans and dodging heroes while being herself and forcing her Father to cook with her—mostly Great Uncle Wang’s recipes.

“I am being bossed around by a child. In my own kitchen.”

“You were the one that claimed me as yours. I demand compensation in bonding time.”

“Uh, Mr. Smith was it? My neice suggested a aimple soup seeing as you are a... novice.”

This lead to an oddity for the Science Rogues—Mr. Freeze, Scarecrow, Strange and Riddler—getting into cooking wars. Only the RKC knew how and Not one of them would spill, only looking at Marinette who was smiling as she said “my great uncle did that!”

This also left the four with less plotting to destroy gotham time. It worked out for the most part.

If she got bored (and she does) she visits Ivy and helps out in the greenhouse or her the wayne’s gardens. Rose now has her own plants sprawling about gotham (marinette dropped fast grow seeds) so she can escape the Greenhouse and move about Gotham without mama bear Ivy trying to take over the city while looking for her teen-appearing child.

Frost was busy with college and so was Ghoul, so she hung out more with Puzzles due to proximity. Puzzles got it in his head to prank Hero Stalker and Batman. Marinette tried to talk him out of it, she did.

It failed. And somehow it was a night with Batgirl and Nightwing/old Robin trying to help Batman with his grief over the last robin who died. The new robin had yet to be revealed, but she noticed hero stalker was more motivated lately. She knew she couldnt stop him—he’s a year older than her and probably rich. (And she’s not supposed to exist...)

So Puzzles pretends to be Riddler and lures them into an old tv set. They were not expecting it to be a hideout for a gang.

And if Marinette was in an old Harley Quinn outfit with a hammer her size to match, well... disguise?

Harley realized what was happening when she checked the groupchat and no one knew where they pair was until Rose was pestered for a bit to have her plants check.

They went into a drug den and the batfam was with them. Fuck.

Puzzles and her get out of there when the realize what’s up. Why? Guns and not being invulnerable.

Marinette is worried though and hides and may hit one of the armed men hard enough to fly across the room.

Puzzles stares at her. She flies to tackle him and grumbles about sunlight messing with her meds again.

Nightwing caught that, realizes who knock off harley is, and guns for the kids. Only there are more goons now and—shit. Where did the kids go?

Batfam took down the gang.

Harley is seen in her car a few blocks away with... are those kids? It trends on social media that Harley has a daughter who’s grounded for messing amwith gangs.

The Council meets to scold Marinette and try to get the story straight.

Dent snorts when he finds out they were just going to silly string the batfam and slime them on camera. The camera was busted in the fight though...

Hero stalker freaks out about the whole thing and tells the pair off. “You almost died!”

“He said my dad was dumb! It was a matter of honor!”

Hero stalker is Done with Puzzles and tries to talk sense into Marinette, who says its her job to keep him from dying, ok?

Hero Stalker/Tim is upset but kind of gets it from watching Batman. Sometimes your partner does dumb things and you have to keep them safe y going along with the dumb thing.

Riddler puts them in a puzzle maze for a week. Marinette figures it out and goes in and out of it to make it look like she’s still trapped.

Strange rolls his eyes as yes, this is his daughter. Yes, she is smarter than Riddler.

Ed Nygma the other hand is keeping Puzzles grounded for another week. He lets Marinette visit to check up on his and Riddler’s states since they share a body and all.

Harley is still lecturing Marinette and gets her to agree shell at least tell Rose when something is up from then on.

Rose puts a plant on marinette. I am not joking, she puts a vine on marinette’s arm to keep her safe and make her take her meds since “you cant fly otherwise nets. And put in your earplugs!”

At somepoint there may be a case of music master making an appearance, but idk if it should be marinette is immune due to earplugs or marinette gets dragged into being seen by the league AND rogues at once and they bith try to grab a very freaked out Marinette who flies back to france where Max is mid-panic since she needs someone to talk to and uh, she figures he knows most of it so, help. She needs logic and hers is shot at the moment.

Next time we get more of a quick fic on marinette’s training with Zsasz as a kid.

[surrealsunday]

1/10 Jaimie! It’s that time of the week again: stupi theories coming for you. And a lot of rumbling too, of course. Let’s start from the beginning: the whole wake up scene was absolute GOLD. The talk with Sofiane (ELIOTT MON COEUR YOU’RE FALLING), our boys on the couch kissing and talking (FUCK OFF JEREMY GO AWAY) and flirting and Lulu denying they are going to have sex again when they’re totally going to have sex again (Hollow Edge bonus chapter vibes here).

2/10 Then the talk with Idriss (Eliott please I know you can be oblivious but I think taht after this chapter we all can establish you know you’re in love with Lucas right?) was amazing, I love how you write Idriss in your stories, I feel like that is the way to write him you know? Like, the Idriss that was supposed to be in the show jumped right in your stories. And this for Imane too. As we’re getting Eliott point of view now, I hope we’ll get a glimpse of Mama and Papa Bakhelall

3/10 But let’s go on: the lunch scene was freaking amazing, Eliott is treating our beloved hedgehod in the right way!!!!!! And Eliott being so tuned on Lucas is like… the best thing in this story, I swear it’s amazing, I always felt that’s the sign to understand you’re really into someone. Lulu searching for Eliott after Marine’s surgery, his need to share with him is joy, was so, immensely cute. I was floating in a ball of tenderness during that scene, AND ELIOTT ASKED HIM TO GO HOME WITH HIM

4/10 LUCAS YOU CAN SAY WHAT YOU WANT BUT THAT WAS TOTALLY MEETING THE PARENTS, I’M NOT GOING TO ACCEPT ANY OBJECTION TO THIS. THE SCENE OUT OF THE RESTAURANT WAS EVERYTHING. “I wanted to kill you because I couldn’t kiss you. Are you really gonna try to say it wasn’t the same for you?” “Tell me it’s the same for you,” “Yeah, you idiot,” THIS. THIIIS. HELPBUSSINESS MAN BASILE! I ADORE THIS! I felt a new vibe about Basile in this story, it’s like “I am the usual dork but at the same time I’m not"

5/10 He seems more solid, more responsible, more adult: I felt like I was reading Bas version of “Skam France 2.0: the old generation but in their late twenties”. I loved him even more. And now here come the teories (there’s always a point of your chapters in which my inner Sherlock Holmes comes through):Theory 1 Lucas has a really really low money income. It came to my mind while reading the car road to Bas, when Eliott insists that Lucas has a proper meal and Lulu says ok then we go to Bas

6/10 I don't know, maybe I’m overthinking; or, Lucas has an eating disorder (but this doesn’t convince me that much). Theory 1 bis: Lucas has some other job. Theory 2: the angst of this story will be really dark. Theory 3: this other job is… wait. I’m almost sure that what I’m saying is total bullshit but…

7/10 I think Moureau, as a family friend, decided to pay for Lucas’ med school and now he is forcing him to pay with sex and money. Or (this is totally absurd, don’t mind me) Lucas, abandoned by his father but determined to become a doctor, considered every single possibility to collect the money he needed, even… prostitution? And Moureau discovered it/became a client and now he is blackmailing Lucas for it. What is eating me alive is that “He knew (that I was gay) before I did”. I have no idea

8/8 on how we should read it.Why isn’t it Sunday already? T-T P.S. I have a feeling that next time it won’t be hate-sex anymore, it will be… loooOooOoOoOoOoOovemaking <3 lot of kisses, have a good day

💕💕💕💕

Yayyyyyyy! First, thank you so much for your comments and thoughts! I had a lot of fun reading through these. 

I’m so glad you love Idriss in the stories. I really love him too and having Eliott’s POV let me show a lot more of their relationship. I’m afraid you won’t see the Bakhellal parents. I actually did think about including them at one particular point in the story but it just wasn’t right and felt too distracting. But yeah, they’re the greatest. 

I loved the lunch scene too! I love establishing the new sort of quality their teasing takes on. And the gentle care they have for one another. And I agree about Basile. Like I think he’d always be a bit of a goof but I think one of the few things the show did well in the last couple of seasons was show us a much greater depth to Basile’s character. And I could see him being really good at whatever he takes on in life. 

I also super enjoy reading through your theories though obviously I can’t confirm or deny anything lol. But yeah, it’s really interesting to hear the things you’re mulling over! 

Honestly this next chapter update is sneaking up on my wayyyyyyy too fast because I have been so busy. But at the same time, I can’t wait for you guys to read it! Hope you have a fab day as well! ❤️❤️❤️