#update it is morning and i have said my piece
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Dance
Viktor x Fem!Reader
Word Count: 3k
Jayce has a plan: convince Viktor to attend the most important charity party in Piltover. But, as expected, Viktor refuses. What he didn't expect was that his assistant would show up at his workshop with a dazzling dress… and an invitation that Jayce secretly gave her. Could he really refuse now?
N/A: English is not my first language, feel free to correct me in the comments and I'll update it. Remember share if you liked it.
Viktor was focused, hunched over his desk as he fine-tuned one of the delicate pieces of hexcore. The dim lamplight illuminated his tired face, with dark circles under his eyes and strands of hair falling across his forehead. He didn’t notice Jayce’s entrance until the echo of the door closing resonated through the workshop.
“Viktor, old friend,” Jayce said, his tone bright and already foreshadowing trouble. “I have news.”
“If it has to do with that charity party, the answer is still no,” Viktor replied without looking at him, adjusting the tool in his hand.
Jayce sighed dramatically, dropping his weight into one of the nearby chairs.
“Mel has insisted that we go. We represent the future of Piltover, remember? Innovators, role models…” Jayce made a wide gesture with his hands, as if he were giving a speech.
“If Mel insists, you can represent us alone,” Viktor replied indifferently. He knew he wasn’t really required here, inviting him was just a formality. Then he looked up and looked at him seriously. “I don’t have time for parties, there’s a lot of work to finish here.”
Not to mention that dancing was something he had crossed off the list of things he could still do.
His friend really wanted Viktor to go, mostly because he had been very down lately, he barely left the lab and there were days where he would find him with his face on his notebooks after falling asleep at some point in the early morning, he was the first to arrive and the last to leave, if he ever did.
Jayce watched him in silence for a moment, before giving him a sly smile.
“Okay, I understand. You can’t just drop your projects. But what if I gave you a reason to go?”
Viktor frowned, distrusting his tone.
—What kind of reason?
Jayce didn't answer. Instead, his smile widened as he glanced towards the door of the workshop, as if he was waiting for something. He had recently discovered what he thought was a clue to the kind of feelings Viktor had for you, the long longing glances, the little smiles, the casual approaches of his hands, he answering any of your curiosities and letting you sing soft melodies while he worked were all very obvious clues to his eyes. Viktor followed the direction of his gaze just as the door opened.
And there you were.
Viktor felt the air leave his lungs. You weren’t wearing your usual practical attire. Instead, you were sporting an elegant iridescent white dress that flowed like water with your every move. The color perfectly complemented your skin tone, and the design highlighted your figure in a way Viktor couldn’t ignore. Your hair was delicately arranged, and a glint in your eyes suggested you was nervous, yet excited.
“Y/N?” Viktor asked, still processing what he was seeing.
You gave him a shy, yet warm smile.
“Jayce invited me as your date,” you said, your tone a mix of apology and expectation. “I hope you don’t mind.”
Viktor slowly turned to Jayce, who now wore an expression of unabashed triumph.
“What have you done?” Viktor asked, his voice low, but laced with disbelief.
“I gave you a reason to go,” Jayce replied, raising his hands in an innocent gesture. “I knew you wouldn’t accept if there wasn’t something… or someone to make the evening interesting for you.”
Viktor felt his face heat up as his thoughts struggled to organize themselves. Of course he felt a certain special affection for you. It had been a secret he had jealously kept, even from himself, and he had refrained from dwelling on it too much, after all they were coworkers. But now, seeing you there, so beautiful, waiting for his answer, completely disarmed him.
“You don’t have to if you don’t want to, Viktor,” you said softly. “I just thought it would be… nice.”
Viktor’s heart skipped a beat. There was something in your tone that made him immediately doubt his usual refusal. For the first time in a long time, the idea of getting away from his work, even for a few hours, didn’t seem so far-fetched. Mostly because he didn’t seem able to wipe that beautiful smile off your face by refusing. His mind searched for excuses for himself, to justify that he had now changed his mind, and that this change had nothing to do with you.
Finally, he stood up with the help of his staff, running a hand through his messy hair, although it didn't help much.
"If you insist…" he murmured, looking at you more than at Jayce. "I suppose I can make an exception."
Jayce smiled widely.
"Perfect. Now, change. You can't go dressed like that."
Viktor let out a resigned sigh as he took the suitcase that Jayce had left with his suit, in another attempt to convince him, but he couldn't stop a small smile from appearing on his lips as he headed to the bathroom to change.
When he left he felt a little silly, he tried to arrange his hair in front of the mirror but it was totally impossible. Jayce see proudly that his plan had paid off, but the most important look for Viktor and the one he looked for as soon as he opened the door was yours. He watched your pupils dilate rapidly as you saw him come out in that elegant suit. Your hands went to your mouth trying to hide a smile. Viktor forced himself to look away to avoid them seeing the small blush that ran across his pale cheeks.
“Oh! I almost forgot.” You quickly went to open one of the tool cabinets, rummaging through the back with the curious gaze of the boys behind you. After a moment, you pulled out a small box, and as if you were a little girl skipping, you approached Viktor with it. “I hope you like it.”
Viktor looked at you in surprise as he took the delicate box in his hands. He opened it delicately to discover a maroon tie between the strands of paper. His gaze traveled from the gift to you several times before giving you a warm smile as he took the tie between his slender fingers.
“Would you have the honor?” You nodded with a smile, as your hands took the tie you got closer to him, managing to smell the coffee aroma that you loved so much, you brought the tie behind his neck inside the collar of his shirt and tied it perfectly over his chest. “Thank you.”
The evening was everything Viktor had expected: lavish, loud, and filled with Piltover’s elites. Laughter and lively conversation echoed between walls adorned with gilded chandeliers and silk curtains. Viktor had always considered these events a waste of time.
When they arrived, Viktor could barely take his eyes off you. Jayce had already gone after the councilwoman, leaving them alone, as Viktor knew he would. His discomfort was evident in the way his hands played with the handle of his cane, which he tried to hide as soon as he began to walk through the crowd. You seemed to radiate confidence with every step, politely greeting the other attendees, as if these events were common for you.
Viktor, however, felt out of place. He held his cane tighter than usual, trying not to trip, but it was difficult given the state of his leg and the huge crowd.
“Relax,” you whispered with a reassuring smile as you tangled your arm through his. “Is it that bad?”
Viktor looked at you, his eyes softening instantly.
“Easy for you to say. You seem made for this.”
She let out a soft laugh.
“Not as much as you think. I’m just trying to look like it.”
A waiter passed by with a tray of wine glasses, taking a couple, offering another to Viktor. He reluctantly grew taller, though he hesitated before taking a sip.
From a safe distance, Jayce watched the scene with a satisfied smile. Mel approached him, arching an eyebrow in curiosity.
“What did you do this time?”
“A little push in the right direction,” Jayce replied, nodding towards where you stood with Viktor.
Mel let out a light laugh, shaking her head.
“I didn’t know you were a matchmaker.”
Jayce said alarmingly, shrugging.
“I’m not. But sometimes, a man needs help to see what’s right in front of him.”
Meanwhile, you and Viktor had climbed the stairs to the second floor, so you were more isolated from the hustle and bustle, it was a big job for him, but he really wanted to get away from the crowd. Plus the second floor was an even more beautiful place than the main hall, full of huge stained glass windows and a balcony at the end.
“I never imagined I’d end up here,” you said, looking at the lights that dyed the floor thanks to the stained glass. “When I was a child, I looked at the towers of Piltover from Zaun and dreamed of seeing them up close.”
“Zaun leaves its mark on all of us,” Viktor said softly, his fingers drumming against the handle of his cane. “But it’s not always a bad thing. Sometimes, it pushes us to… be better.”
You looked at him with a shy smile, your eyes meeting his.
"Do you think we've accomplished that?"
Viktor was silent for a moment sighing before answering, then slightly tilted his head at you.
"You certainly have."
Your eyes widened in surprise, a slight blush coloring your cheeks.
"That's quite a compliment coming from you."
The sound of music filled the air, and the guests began to make their way to the main hall for the dance. Jayce didn't hesitate to take Mel's hand and head out onto the dance floor.
"It's time to dance" you said, looking over the railing at the rest of the guests dancing with their partners with some longing.
"I don't dance" Viktor answered immediately. It was one of the things he had crossed off the list of things he could still do.
You looked at Viktor, shaking your head.
"I can't…"he didn't like saying that at all, but he didn't want her to be disappointed for failing even in the attempt to do it, all his life he had known that those things weren't for him, so he didn't give himself the time to even try. "I'm sorry to disappoint you." Viktor approached the railing, to look at all those couples dancing next to you.
"Disappoint me?" you answered incredulously, carefully bringing one of your hands closer to his "I don't think you can ever do that."
Your pinky gently caressed his hand, it was okay if he didn't want to dance, you had already witnessed what the pain in his leg could cause him and you didn't want that to happen today. You were pleased to just have his presence by your side, that was enough for you.
Viktor sighed, feeling guilty for 'ruining your night' he looked at you and knew he had to take the risk. He reached out a hand to you, more shaky than he would have liked.
“This time I might try.”
You took his hand carefully, leading him away from the railing, to his own little dance floor. As the music continued, Viktor tried to focus on following your steps, but he realized his attention was completely fixed on you, the way you held his hand, the way he felt your body close to his, your warmth against the cold of your skin. He couldn't help but blush as he finally worked up the courage to look at your face, your smile, the way you looked at him as if he were more than just an inventor addicted to his work.
For the first time in a long time, Viktor allowed himself to let go of the cane that made an almost imperceptible sound as it fell to the ground, he allowed himself to be enveloped by the moment, by the sensations, by you. He forced his leg to be useful to him for the first time, slowly under the silver lights of the moon, the outside world faded away, the pressure of his work, everything that tormented him left him to live the moment with you.
"Viktor, your cane…" you rushed quickly to grab it, thinking that you had dropped it by mistake but his hand in yours stopped you.
"I want to try it like this." He said as he extended his other hand for you to take. You weren't sure if that was the best thing for him, but the confidence on his face, the way he looked as if he were begging you to let him live that moment like that ended up convincing you.
Jayce, watching the scene from a safe distance at the bottom of the stairs, smiled to himself.
"It's about time." he said before Mel appeared and he happily let himself be dragged back to the dance floor.
The dance continued, and although Viktor's movements were a little stiff, your slow, gentle movements managed to relax him little by little. Despite his lack of experience, Viktor was surprised to find a natural rhythm next to you. The murmur of the rest of the guests, the echo of laughter and conversations, faded as your eyes remained fixed on his, with your hands resting on his shoulders, and his own hands caressing your waist.
"See? It wasn't so terrible after all," you murmured with a smile as you buried your face in his neck.
Viktor looked down, his lips curving into a slight smile. But he knew he couldn't last much longer standing without his cane, he was starting to feel that stabbing pain in his leg, he tried to control it as best he could, he didn't want that moment with you to end.
"It's… bearable." He tried to keep his body as relaxed as possible, to avoid you noticing and he feeling like a dying man again.
You laughed, a sound so warm and sincere that it caused Viktor to have a strange tingle in his chest.
"Always so enthusiastic?" you joked.
"Maybe the environment has an influence" he answered, keeping his tone sarcastic but with an unusual softness that you didn't miss.
A comfortable silence settled between the two of them as they continued to sway to the music. Viktor, normally so oblivious to social interactions, couldn't help but wonder how someone like you, so kind and brilliant, was more than comfortable being in his life. And more importantly, how he had been lucky enough to have you stay in it.
As the music began to become softer, both of their movements became slower, until they stopped completely. You stayed close, your hands still joined, until he spoke in a voice barely audible to you:
"Thank you for joining me tonight."
You nodded.
"Thank you… for making it bearable."
He smiled, his gaze lowering for a moment before meeting yours again, as you picked up his cane from the floor and surrendered.
"Thank you. We should do this more often, don't you think?"
The suggestion took you by surprise, you didn't think Viktor would want to repeat something like that, but instead of responding with a negative and referring to his leg, you simply said:
"Maybe." with a sweet smile, now that you both shared more than just work. Without the bustle and inquisitive glances of the attendees, it was as if they were in a world of their own.
The party had reached its moment of recess, with laughter and soft music filling the air. The guests began to disperse throughout the place and some began to climb the stairs. The moment you shared was abruptly broken when a visibly drunk councilman stumbled towards you with a smirk on his face. His ostentatious attire and wine glass in hand made him seem out of place in the serene atmosphere you had created.
“Ah, there are the strangers!” he exclaimed, his tone heavy with mockery. His eyes assessed you both, lingering a little longer on you, an expression that made you shudder in disgust. You had received such looks before, you knew them and knew they led to nothing good.
Viktor tensed instantly, straightening up with difficulty and leaning more heavily on his cane to take a step forward.
“Can we help you with something?” Viktor asked coldly, clearly uncomfortable with the man’s presence.
The councilman let out an exaggerated laugh.
“Oh, I don’t need any help from you.” Though I must say, Heimerdinger has strange priorities, letting a couple of second-class citizens mingle among us.
Your brow furrowed and you clenched your fists, more than ready to throw him down the stairs and pretend he slipped. But before you could say anything, the man turned to Viktor with a sly grin.
“You… Viktor… How admirable that you accomplish so much in such… poor health. It’s a miracle you can stay on your feet, don’t you think? Though, of course, when all you have to offer is your brain, I guess there’s not much else you can use to impress.”
The comment hit like a whiplash, but Viktor didn’t respond immediately, it wasn’t the first time he heard someone talk about him like that, he didn’t care at all. His grip on the cane tightened just because you were there, and his jaw clenched, of all people in the world, he didn’t want you to be the one to hear that. He remained silent, his gaze fixed on the man.
The councilor, seeing that he wasn’t getting a response, turned his attention to you again. His eyes scanned you shamelessly, his smile twisting even more.
“And you, my dear… I guess it makes sense that you’re here with him. The girls of Zaun always know how to… adapt to circumstances, don’t they? A perfect match: a disembodied brain and a… well, you know.”
Indignation took hold of you. Your chest rose and fell rapidly, but before you could respond or move to fit his nose with a punch, Viktor grabbed your hand, stopping the hurricane of thoughts in your mind.
“Stop it,” Viktor said, his voice low but firm.
The councilman raised his eyebrows, feigning surprise.
“Oh, did you hit a nerve? I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to-”
“No,” Viktor interrupted, taking a step forward, despite the obvious annoyance the movement caused him. “Don’t be sorry. And I don’t want your fake apologies. Just… shut your mouth and get out.”
The man snorted, but before he could say anything else, you faced him, walking steadily in front of him, your voice clear and determined.
“It must be exhausting carrying so much shit around,” you said, with an icy smile. “But I guess I couldn’t expect anything else from someone whose only virtue is his last name.”
The councilman looked at you, surprised by your bravery, and then snorted before turning to leave, muttering something unintelligible and spilling half of his glass of wine on the floor.
When you were alone again, the air was still tense, your fists still clenched at your sides. Viktor finally let out a long sigh, closing his eyes for a moment.
“You shouldn’t have… faced him,” he said softly. “I’m used to his usual nonsense.”
You looked at him with a determined expression.
“And you shouldn’t bear that in silence. No one deserves to be treated like that, especially you. They should lick your shoes, thanks to you this city really became the city of progress. You shouldn’t have to get used to it, Viktor.” You intertwined your hand with his, like an instinct you couldn’t ignore.
He looked down at their intertwined hands. He could feel the warmth of your touch breaking through the cold barrier he had built up over the years.
“I don’t believe his words, they’re irrelevant to me,” he finally admitted, his voice laced with honesty.
You gently squeezed his hand, forcing him to look at you.
“Then stand up for yourself, because you know what I believe? I believe you’re more than just a brilliant brain, Viktor. You’re not just a man with a cane or someone who comes from Zaun. You’re so much more than that, a genius, a visionary. There’s so much about you that’s amazing besides your wit.”
Viktor let out a short, dry laugh, but there was a spark of something else in his expression. Maybe gratitude, maybe something deeper that he didn’t dare name yet.
“You’re… persistent,” he said, with a slight smile that quickly faded as he looked back into your eyes. “But I don’t understand why.”
You tilted your head, confused.
“Why, what?”
Viktor looked away, unsure of how to continue, but he knew the words were already on the edge of his lips, and he couldn’t turn back.
“Why do you care so much about me? Why are you still here, by my side, despite everything. Helping me with everything, always taking care of me, looking at me as if there was nothing more interesting than me when I talk to you…even now.”
You looked at him for a long moment with a huge blush caught in your cheeks, and then, with a warmth in your voice that almost disarmed him, you answered, “Because I see you, Viktor. I see who you really are, and… I care about you. Much more than I should.”
The world seemed to stop in that instant. Viktor swallowed, feeling the air grow heavier, but also clearer at the same time.
“Y/N…” His voice was a whisper, as if he was taste out your name in a different, more intimate context that even he didn’t know about.
Their eyes met again, and this time, Viktor didn't look away, just watching your eyes sparkle and your pupils widen, it warmed his heart to know it was because you were looking at him.
"I should tell you now, but well…it's something new."
You smile softly, giving him some relief.
"You don't need to be good at it. Just tell me what you feel."
Viktor took a deep breath, as if he was preparing for a leap he had feared for a long time.
"I admire you. Not just for your intelligence or your ability to put up with my…quirks. But because you make me feel different…alive. With you, I don't feel alone. With you, I feel like…I can be something more."
His words were clumsy, but the sincerity in them was undeniable.
“And I think… I feel something really deep for you, Y/N.”
The silence that followed was overwhelming, but not because you were hesitating. But because you were taking in each word, feeling them deeply. Slowly, a smile spread across your face, and with a determined step, you closed the distance between you.
“That’s good, Viktor,” you whispered, leaning in just enough for him to hear each word clearly. “Because I’m already in love with you.”
Viktor looked at you, a flash of something soft and warm crossing his eyes.
“Thank you,” he finally said, his voice almost a whispered gasp. Despite everything he believed made him unworthy, you always saw him as something more.
The air seemed to vibrate between you, charged with an energy neither of you could explain but both of you understood. As the lights of Piltover continued to shine in the distance, the two of them towered over high society, standing together in a pure, private moment.
Jayce, who had been watching the scene with a mix of satisfaction and pride, decided not to interrupt. Mel, at his side, looked at him with an arched eyebrow.
“Happy with your masterpiece?” she asked, taking a sip of her glass.
“More than I imagined,” Jayce replied, crossing his arms as a triumphant smile lit up his face. “Viktor deserved it, although he’ll probably hate me tomorrow.”
“Oh, I don’t think he’ll hate you,” Mel said, watching the couple. “Maybe he’ll even thank you… eventually.”
As the night progressed and the lights in the hall grew dimmer, you and Viktor remained close, away from the bustle of the rest of the guests. For the first time in a long time, Viktor wasn’t thinking about the Hexcore, or his work, or his body, or the expectations he had placed on himself.
At that moment, there were only the two of them, and that, for Viktor, was a discovery as fascinating as any scientific breakthrough.
#arcane#arcane x reader#arcane x you#viktor arcane#viktor arcane x reader#viktor machine herald#viktor nation#the machine herald#viktor lol#lol viktor#viktor league of legends#viktor x reader#arcane viktor#arcane fanfic#arcane league of legends#arcane x y/n#arcane x female reader#arcane jayce#arcane mel
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everything, but not anything
- gojo satoru x reader
you were his last remainder of the happiest blue spring in his life, until your untimely demise. and on the death's door, he finally found you again.
genre/warnings: angsty wangsty, consolation towards the end
notes: i said i can't create gojo fics without feeling depressed, so here i present to you, angst. it's inspired from a thread in twitter i read about how gojo was given everything but he couldn't do anything and my heart just incredibly hurts and―this happened. it's unedited because the idea popped into my mind at 1 in the morning
i wrote this while listening to this wonderful song. consider it the theme song for this piece. i highly recommend you to read this and listen to it!
[update] sequel -> found you
general masterlist
You were so pretty. So really pretty, in fact. And he likes pretty things. Perhaps that was what spurred him to spontaneously ask you out.
You declined him at first―after all, he was a special grade weirdo. And you half-expected him to give up soon enough, only that he didn't. He persisted like a cockroach, smothering you with his very being. Then like a sweet romance novel, you too finally fell for him, melting at his clumsy attempts to woo you.
And by God, you were happy together. To Satoru, it was the brightest, most vibrant page in his life. And with his very being, he would do everything he could to protect you. After all, he was blessed with the best, he had all means to protect you.
He should've known better.
It started with his failed star plasma vessel mission. Riko was dead, and at that time he was just numb. Later, he made excuses. He couldn't have foreseen that a sorcerer killer would join the fray and made a mess of things.
But then his best friend, Suguru, left. Satoru couldn't make excuses any longer. For that, he was wholly responsible. From then, he realized that just being strong wasn't enough. And throughout those dark days, you were with him, consoling him as you brought his head to your chest, letting him sleep in your arms.
"Don't ever leave me, okay?" he whispered at the dead of the night with hoarse voice. It made your heart sting. You nodded and ran your fingers throughout his hair, mumbling a soft "of course."
And you never did. You were always by his side.
Satoru was really grateful for that. To have the last years of your life by his side. Looking back, it was like a beautiful mirage.
He had hidden himself behind the facade of the strongest. The unreachable. Untouchable. It felt nice, still is. Before he had known it, he had drawn this line between himself and other people. Between him and you. He wasn't lonely, but he was at the very same time.
And perhaps he had gotten way too arrogant, and thus the heavens decided to humble him.
He couldn't prevent the Shibuya Incident from happening. Worse, he fell into the enemy's hand and got sealed, and just before he was trapped inside that accursed box, he saw you die. And even after the most excruciating 19 days of his life afterwards, he couldn't do anything about it.
Your face haunted him. The tears you shed for him still lingered at the tips of his fingertips. The blood from your mouth still soaked his vision.
"Satoru..." you croaked. You were afraid. Afraid of dying, but most of all, afraid of leaving him. You had promised him once, on the bunkbed of your dorms back in Jujutsu High, that you wouldn't leave him. Tears wouldn't stop falling from your beautiful eyes.
Satoru burned that image on his mind. He wanted to hate himself with every fiber of his being, but then you said the most damnable thing possible.
"Thank you... for everything..."
And you had a smile on your face. In your last moments, you decided to convey how much he meant to you in this life. How much you cherished him. You prayed with all your heart that it would reach him.
And once again, just like the first day he saw you at the training grounds of Jujutsu High, Satoru found you to be really breathtaking. You were beautiful even as you laid dying. Even as his visions were obscured as he fell into the darkness.
Inside the prison realm where time passed long and uncertain, he made himself numb once again.
You were his most cherished figment of the most precious memory held in his heart―the three years of his youth. He wouldn't have changed anything about it. He was devastated, severely so, but so did the sweetness aftertaste he felt.
Your feelings reached him, and because of that, even if the road ahead was long and hard and painful, he would stay on that road.
If it meant he could meet you again on the other side of this dream... he'd stay and move towards tomorrow, no matter how bleak it was.
When his comrades freed him from the prison realm, he gained knowledge that most people he knew were also dead during his absence. Nanami. Yaga. The students.
Perhaps it was his curse. To be blessed with everything, but not being able to do anything about it.
He had nothing more to lose when he fought against Sukuna. He gave it his all. Everything his life had led him to―he put it all on the line.
And suddenly―suddenly, he was back to the happiest chapter of his youth. Everyone was there. Suguru was there. Nanami, Haibara, even Riko.
And you.
On the other side of that dream, you were once again standing before him, in your old uniform, just like when you’d get ready for a class so many years ago, and with the smile he fell in love with. The smile he would gladly fight the world for.
"Satoru," you called, breathless, but just like before you left him the first time, you frowned and your eyes suddenly glistened with tears. "Why... are you here? How did you―"
But you choked back your tears when he ran to you and pulled you into his arms so tightly. You heard him grunt, and then to your surprise, slightly sob.
Now he is no longer Gojo Satoru, the strongest. He is back to a young sorcerer wanting so badly to live his youth to the fullest, happiest.
"You lied to me," he reprimanded you amidst his weeping. "You left. You freaking left―"
Your vision blurred. "I'm sorry..."
Satoru let you go to have a good look at you. You were no longer bleeding. Your insides were intact. Just a little crying because you couldn't help it.
"I love you, you know that right?" he blurted with the most sullen expression he could muster. He turned back into the child-boy you somehow fell in love with.
"Satoru," you breathed out, anxious. "You shouldn't be here―"
"I should," he cut you with a firm tone. "I have no regrets. I have done what I can, and now―"
"But the others―they need you! They need you, Satoru."
He drooped his head. He had thought it over too, but he had come to a final conclusion. "No. They don't."
Maybe it was finally the time to let go of it. It was time to just... pass it over. No more interventions. No more tipping the balance of the world itself.
Immediately, you understand what he means. Gojo Satoru has served his purpose. There was nothing left that he must and could do.
"You waited long, huh?" you whispered with tears, yet a smile bloomed on your face.
"I did."
"Then... now that you're here," you offered your hand towards him, and then looked at the faces of your friends. They were all beaming at you and him, waiting for this exact moment.
You stared at him fondly, lovingly.
"Would you... walk this road with me once again?"
Satoru snapped his head. He nodded at you with pure certainty, zero hesitation. "Yes."
He took your hand, grasping it tightly in his.
"Even when there's a possibility that you have to walk to the other side of a nightmare again?”
"I would," Satoru resolutely replied.
Because it's you, he would. He'd willingly and gladly cross the throes of hell and set out on this lonely yet hopeful journey, just to meet you.
You chuckled at him heartily, and Satoru felt the immense love he held for you as the two of you walked towards tomorrow, without regrets.
It may be his curse, to have everything yet nothing at the same time. But each time he would be faced with this decision, he'd remember that feeling and let go of everything just for this very chance to live a life with you again.
#jjk x reader#gojo x reader#gojo fluff#gojo angst#jjk angst#jujutsu kaisen x reader#jujutsu kaisen fluff#gojo satoru#jjk fic#gojo x you#gojo satoru x reader#jujustsu kaisen x reader#gojo satoru x reader angst#jjk236#jujutsu kaisen#angst with a happy ending#or angst with a somewhat happy ending?#okay this actually spiraled out of control#satoru gojo x reader#jjk fanfic#gojo
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Summary: James has always woken up early, but you and regulus always sleep late
Poly!starchaser x reader (James potter x reader x regulus black) | 674 words
Tw: a cat, James is shirtless, regulus and reader have a little anxiety maybe???, almost a full all-nighter
an: so sorry for no updates! I'm working on a few longer multichapter dc/mcu fics for my other account @nightinthemarsh. Also not a huge fan of this fic tbh
✶⋆.˚꩜ .ᐟ˙⋆ ✶⋆.˚꩜ .ᐟ˙⋆ ✶⋆.˚꩜ .ᐟ˙⋆ ✶⋆.˚꩜ .ᐟ
James' alarm is nearly silent due to his fear of waking the other two sleepers in the room. Or at least the other two people that should be asleep.
James went to bed close to eight the night before, the earliest sleeper in the relationship, due to both being a professional quidditch player and waking up at five in the morning. Sitting up and putting on his glasses, it's painfully clear he's alone in the room, bed cold and plushies abandoned on the bed next to him.
The skin between James’ brows crease in concern, slipping pajama pants and his pair of slippers by the left nightstand. Walking out of the bedroom, he notes that most of the lights are off, save for the light that emanates from the living room.
James is nearly quiet as he enters the living room, standing at the bottom of the staircase, but the sight he sees warms his heart. While also causing some worry.
Both you and Regulus are in nearly the exact same spots you were in when James went up to bed, save for the cat that now sits in your lap. A warm glow from two of the lamps allows the two of you to view the puzzle you started the day prior.
The worry in James’ brows never leaves as he walks closer, putting effort into not startling the two of you.
“I thought you guys said you’d be in bed by midnight?” Despite his efforts, both you and Regulus still startle just a bit as you both quickly turn to look at him.
“We were hoping to finish the puzzle.” Regulus tells your shared boyfriend, as if that's the only logical thing to do.
“And we almost have!” James takes his first good look at the puzzle (apart from when he saw it eight hours ago). It was a rather ambitious one, a little over three thousand pieces, but by now it looks close to completion.
“But you really should have headed to bed hours ago.” he crouches down next to the coffee table you both are sitting at to be on your level.
“After we finish the puzzle, right, amour?”
“Of course.”
James looks between the two of you as you return to the puzzle. Part of James feels rather greedy at the moment. Most times when he wakes up, both of you are dead to the world in your shared bed, so he doesn’t see his partners until mid-afternoon or whenever his practice ends.
But, he also knows that the two of you likely don’t get enough sleep as it is, and sometimes that truly concerns him.
“What if we all head back to bed, I can wake back up in an hour or two, and later we can all work on it together.” James’ smile is undeniably warm and his hair is so bloody beautiful all tousled and frizzy, and he's shirtless, and it's so hot and both you and Regulus are extremely weak for this man.
The look you and him share also shows that you both know James could never sit through this puzzle. But the idea of sleeping does sound rather nice.
“Are you sure you are okay with waking up later?” you ask the question both you and Regulus are undoubtedly worried about. Not wanting to impose on James due to your own reckless sleeping habits.
James is slightly distracted as he pets the cat on your lap, the tortoiseshell you lot had decided to get a few weeks ago. “Yeah, it’s fine; it's not a super busy day anyway.”
Sometimes, when he looks up at you, it starts to make sense that his animagus is a stage, because he has the most stunning brown eyes.
Half an hour later the puzzle lay abandoned on the coffee table, cat now laying at the end of the bed, with James two lovers passed out in bed. Even if this isn’t the way his usual mornings go, James couldn’t be happier this morning.
#marauders#marauders era#james potter imagine#james potter oneshot#james potter x y/n#james potter x you#james potter x reader#james potter x regulus black#james potter fluff#regulus black one shot#regulus black imagine#james x regulus#regulus black#regulus black oneshot#regulus black x gn reader#regulus black x you#regulus black x y/n#regulus black x reader#regulus black x james potter#poly!starchaser x reader#poly!starchaser#poly!jegulus#poly!jegulus x reader
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[ credits of the Neteyam pic go to cinetrix ]
Champagne Problems.
Pairing: Neteyam Sully x female!human!reader
CW: angsty, reader feeling her heart hurt, adeline being funny and shipping reader and neteyam, symptoms of PTSD (like a nightmare), sexual tension, confessions of love, angry neteyam, confused neteyam, yearning, crying, fluff, sexual content, neteyam loving reader's breasts, neteyam using his fangs on reader's body, p in v, territorial neteyam, needy and clingy neteyam, slight breeding kink, creampie
I almost cried writing this chapter and istg my pussy clenched hard while I was writing the smut part so… have a good read, I guess lol ps: I know I said I was gonna have a break from uploading my long fics (and I am!) but there was an itch in my hand to finish this story and I gave in and scratched it lol I kinda knew I eventually would. But I'm only gonna update the other fics next year. This one was an exception bc there was only one chapter left (this one lol)
Not proofread. I woke up in the middle of the night to write this, it's already morning outside and I'm sleepy and sick :(
Part 7: All I want is you
𓇼
It's hard to be anywhere these days when all I want is you
You're a flashback in a film reel on the one screen in my town
And I just wanted you to know that this is me trying
this is me trying (Taylor Swift)
𓇼
In the morning, you woke up and realized you were no longer sitting on the floor, resting your back against the wall of Kiri's marui, but rather laying in your mat. You had a sharp headache but you didn't really know why. Maybe lack of enough sleep, maybe tension… Your eyes searched around for Neteyam but he was no longer there. You knew instantly that Neteyam had been the one to carry you to your mat. He was the only one awake other than you when you two were talking while it was eclipse and you knew it wasn't his nature to leave a girl sleeping while sitting down on the floor in a weird position and go home. No, he was too much of a gentleman for that.
The realization that you were about to go back to the lab in a few days and leave Neteyam behind again hit you like a train. The thought of being without him and having no guarantee that he wasn't gonna find a mate while you were gone and when you'd come back and see him again, he'd be happy with a beautiful na'vi girl by his side - perhaps even carrying his baby in her womb - broke you in a billion little pieces.
Your heart started to beat fast in your chest, like it was gonna escape from inside your body and come out through your throat. But there was also a big lump in your throat. Anxiety stinged your whole body like sharp, thin needles.
You didn't want to lose Neteyam. Just imagining having to stare at a wall in your room at night, to see his sweet face in the crushing darkness and feel the tears rolling down your face, reminding you that you would never be able to hold him again, to feel his huge but gentle hands on your skin, to smell his comforting scent… and worse: to know he would be in some other girl's arms every night, letting her kiss him, having… God, having sex with her…
No. You couldn't let him go. It would rip your heart apart.
And if Neteyam didn't go for Munì like you thought he did, that meant that he didn't stop loving you… right? That's what you were desperately hoping for. You were almost sure you had seen him get slightly happy when you acted like an idiot and let him see how jealous you were of Munì last night. Maybe that meant he still felt something for you.
If you were right about Neteyam's feelings, you didn't quite know why he loved the mess of a girl that you were but… somehow he did, and he was sad because of you, because you refused to be his mate when that's all you truly wanted, in the first place. You had let fear hold you back once again. But not this time. You had to be brave. You had to at least try.
Putting the sheet that was once over you to the side, you uncovered your body and, in a rapid motion, you got up from your mat and got to your feet, feeling the slight coldness on the floor of the marui. Your feet walked slowly but surely among your two best human friends, trying hard not to step on or kick one of the girls as they were sleeping right next to your mat.
You got startled by Adeline's voice echoing in the morning air as she whispered energetically to you.
"(y/n), where are you going?" Her voice was hoarse and slightly funny, because of slumber.
"I thought you were sleeping!" You whispered back as you looked at her sleepy and moody face while she laid down in her mat
"I was but I felt the need to pee and woke up. Answer my question, please!" She demanded
Your heart started beating fast and you spoke "I'm gonna try and make things right with Neteyam."
"Thank God." She dramatically grunted "I knew you liked him all along, I just wouldn't try and force you to mate with the guy, of course. But damn, I've known you since we were kids and I know when you're in love. I wanted to slap you when I saw you looking gloomy and I would ask you what was wrong and you would say that it was nothing but I just knew you were missing him and regretting refusing to be his mate. And Neteyam brought you back to your mat in his freaking arms! You can't let the guy go, you idiot! He loves you! Can't you see it? You both love each other! What was stopping you before from saying “Hey, I know I'm a bit crazy but I wanna be your mate!”?” She sighed, like she was tired of that whole situation
“How do you know Neteyam carried me back to my mat?” Surprise was all over your face
“I woke up at eclipse with your chatter, mamas.” She said nonchalantly
“Oh…” You awkwardly spoke “So, you heard everything?” You cringed
“I heard a lot of it. Enough to know Neteyam is worth it. Now do what you gotta do. I gotta go relieve myself.” She demanded like a mother would
Your laughter echoed around. Adeline didn't realize how funny she was. You loved her. So, so much. That bitch was everything to you.
In only seconds you found yourself rushing out of the marui's door and your feet walking quickly through the warm Metkayina sand.
After a good while looking around and only seeing turquoise skinned tall Metkayina people, you finally found Neteyam. The sight of his broad, striped back did things to you. It made you remember how insanely good it felt when he was inside of you that rainy night on his hammock.
"Neteyam!" You yelled, sounding way more desperate than you had wanted to, and Neteyam rapidly turned around looked at you, his face covered with surprise
"I'm sorry! I do wanna be with you!" You spoke, breath a bit labored as you felt nervous and insecure about his reaction. The next thing you saw, you were breaking down in tears.
"Why did you refuse me, then?" Neteyam asked, slightly angry and utterly confused
He did not understand why you had put you both through all that pain if you did love him too.
"I guess I was just afraid of finally having something beautiful in my life again, to feel safe again and then lose it. I couldn't bear to lose you. The truth is, I've had a crush on you since we first met too and I think I started to have deeper feelings for you at the party. Maybe we fell for each other at the same time" you chuckled wearily between tears, thinking that if it truly happened, it was beautiful and seemed like something out of a romantic movie
“Were you afraid that I was gonna leave you?” Neteyam asked, furrowing his hairless eyebrows
“Yes…” You shamefully confirmed.
It seemed like you only ever thought the worst of Neteyam, even though he was known to be a good man and only proved you again and again how much he cared about you.
"Why would I ever leave you if I love you? It's as simple as that, tawtute." Neteyam stated
An amazed smile was born amidst your tears and your heart sped up as your brain processed those words.
"Are you saying you… love me?" It still seemed too good to be true.
"I'm saying I love you more than you will ever know, syulang." Neteyam walked closer to you and tried to touch your hand
You backed away slightly and he felt frustrated. Even as you declared your love for him you were still so guarded. Neteyam let out an impatient breath out of his feline nostrils.
“Tawtute, please, be my mate.” He asked you once again, his heart open to you once again.
“But what about tsaheylu? You can’t make it with me! What if you one day realize you regret missing out on this experience? It’s such an important thing to your people…” You let out a choked sob as you pronounced those words that felt like a stab in the heart
“Not again with the excuses…” Neteyam thought
“Listen” Neteyam asked for your attention “I do not care if you don’t have tendrils and we can’t make tsaheylu. What’s even the point of tsaheylu if I can’t make it with the girl I love? Tsaheylu is about sharing your affection, your devotion, your need with your mate and I don’t need or want anyone else but you, tawtute.”
You kept sobbing and just couldn't seem to stop.
Neteyam grabbed you and held you inside his strong, long arms, one of his hands on the back of your head, pressing it against his body and the other on your shoulder. His warm embrace felt reassuring.
"It's okay, oeyä tawtute. You are safe with me."
After a while holding you like that, he gently pushed you away from him and held your chin up so you could look at his face.
"I won't ever leave you. I promise you, with the Great Mother as my witness, I will never ever let you go. I'm yours forever. I have been yours for so long…" He gave you a calm smile and wiped your tears away
Your gleaming eyes gazed up at his face. He was so beautiful, his dark blue stripes forming intricate pattern on his forehead, a pattern unique to his body. His bioluminescent freckles adorned his big face and shone slightly even in the light of day. You were so damn lucky to have such a beautiful man be so deeply in love with you.
“So, what's it gonna be?” Neteyam's big thumb caressed your reddened face as his lips were curled in a gentle smile, showing no teeth “Can I finally get an “yes” from your beautiful lips?”
You chuckled and smiled big.
“Yes.” Neteyam's heart swelled with affection and relief “Yes, I'm gonna be your mate, Neteyam.”
“Nga yawne lu oer, oeyä tawtute.” (I love you, my human) Neteyam grabbed your face that was tiny inside his two big hands and kissed you eagerly, his lips pressing against yours like he had been needing that for so long.
Neteyam had been dreaming awake every night about how it would feel if he ever got to kiss your small mouth again. His tongue touched the slit of your mouth, deliciously warm and wet and you parted your lips so he could explore the insides of your mouth. Neteyam's large tongue licked your tongue and you moaned in delight at the sensation. You had missed his kisses so damn much… Neteyam tasted your mouth like you were the sweetest berry juice in the whole Universe.
“I missed your lips and your tongue, syulang. I was craving you.” Neteyam said and softly placed a last peck in your lips
“I missed you too. A lot.” You smiled at him, still tasting him on your tongue "I love you too." Neteyam smiled at you when hearing those words he was dying to hear for so long.
“Come, have lunch with me, oeyä hì'i muntxate.” (my small mate)
You agreed and Neteyam took your hand inside his much bigger one, taking you to the place where the na'vi were handling food to each other.
Many curious blue eyes looked at the both of you as Neteyam possessively held you by your waist and talked to you gently.
“I'm gonna get some fish and herbs for us, okay?” He smiled happily at you, like he either didn't notice or didn't care about how all the Metkayina at that part of the reef seemed to be watching yours and Neteyam's every move.
Quickly he grabbed the fish and took you to some rocks away from everyone else, what made you let out a relieved silent breath.
You two ate your fish, that had been prepared on a bonfire - it tasted delicious, by the way. Slightly spicy but also with fresh notes of something that reminded you of peppermint. Alien food was better than you had ever anticipated while you prepared on Earth to travel to Pandora.
"By the way, I'm sorry about your arm. I bet it hurt a lot…" You brought it up, after swallowing a mouthful of fish
"Not that much. I'm strong." He played around but Neteyam truly wanted you to see him as a strong na'vi male. He knew it was boyish but he did it anyway.
He won a quick joyful chuckle from you.
"I was gonna tell you that yesterday but I guess I got too nervous and then too emotional and I ended up forgetting to. I'm sorry, I think I tend to seem self-centered sometimes…" You spoke
"Don't worry about it. You do seem aloof and a little self-centered" You scoffed in a joking manner at his bluntness but you actually said “Ouch!” on the inside.
Damn, Neteyam truly knew how to humble someone...
“But I know that's not who you really are. People just have to take enough time to get to know you and they'll see what I see."
"And what do you see?" Your eyes shone with wonder and your voice was playful
"I see a smart, strong, sensitive and amazingly beautiful girl."
Your cheeks turned red. You weren't expecting so much praise.
“Ok, stop… I'm not all that.” You awkwardly stated, avoiding his gaze
“Of course you are. I don't know why you can't see it, tawtute.”
Maybe because you hadn't heard that a lot throughout your life…
To be fair, you had been called beautiful and smart many times but not the other two. Kate and Adeline would tell you that you were strong when you needed to hear it but you always wondered if they perhaps just said that because they were your closest, best friends and they only wanted to make you feel better.
𓇼
After lunch, Neteyam sneaked out with you and took you to a private place on the beach where his hammock was hanging, somewhere more secluded, where the both of you could be alone. You knew just what he wanted and you could not lie and say that you were not craving the exact same thing.
Neteyam took you in his arms, winning a squeaky laugh from you as he lift you off your feet.
Neteyam sat you on his big hammock, your legs hanging in the air and not touching the clear sand. He knelt in front of you and before you knew it, he was kissing you. Neteyam eagerly took your lower lip between his soft, full lips, suckling on it ever so slightly and then pressing his mouth against yours. Neteyam's huge blue hands cupped both your breasts over your white cropped top and you whimpered in pleasure.
"Oeyä tawtute…" he cried out "Let me see these titties" his mouth hanged slightly open with anticipation and desire
Once you let him take your bra off, Neteyam groaned in an animalistic, primal way.
"These perfect soft titties are mine now, oeyä muntxate. Only mine."
"Yours, Neteyam." You breathed, so taken by him and the moment. Your panties were slick with your juices, so much he turned you on.
Neteyam laid you down gently but eagerly on his hammock. He wasted no time and quickly brought his lips to your breasts. He had been dreaming of that ever since the first time he saw your breasts jiggle under your shirt when you were walking fast, troubled with your scientist work. Your boobs were just so different from the na'vi females ones and it made Neteyam daydream about how it would feel to have your small buds inside his mouth.
Neteyam sucked on your nipples like he was hungry and desperate to taste your skin. He licked your sensitive buds swiftly, leaving them hard and wet with his saliva. All you could do was look down at his mesmerizing blue face, staring at his bioluminescent little freckles and moan loud. You started to worry if people could hear but you decided it was not important if they did or not and you just did not care. That intimate, raw moment you were having with your Neteyam was much more important than anything else in the Universe.
He started using his fangs to tease your breasts slowly and you whimpered at the sting but also enjoyed the bittersweet pleasure it gave you.
“If you want me to stop, just say it, oeyä tawtute.”
“No. Keep doing it, please” You asked
Neteyam bit your right breast harder this time and you moaned loud again. The acute feeling of his sharp fangs harassing your sensitive skin made you feel an incredible sensation that lied somewhere between discomfort and delight but that ended up just being incredibly addictive. Your folds were even more soaked by now.
“Neteyam, please, fuck me, baby” you begged “I need you.”
“Fuck, muntxate, you're so needy for me. It's so hot, yawne…” Neteyam's heavy breath collided with your skin, sending shivers all over your body
Neteyam undressed you quickly and took his loincloth off just as rapidly, his cock hard and proud, slightly curved to the side.
Neteyam took his cock in his hand and rubbed his swollen tip on your glistening clit, making your body tremble.
“Neteyam… please.” You protested
“Say you want it.” He looked into your eyes, his big golden irises shining with the sight of you in front of him, his mouth in a teasing smirk. His accent drove you insane.
“Please, fuck me…” Your face showed him how desperate you were to feel him
“Do you want me to fill you up with my cock, tawtute?” He dig for more
“Yes, Neteyam, I need your big cock inside of my pussy, please, please…” It's like you couldn't take it anymore. Your cunt felt so empty without him.
After hearing those enticing words, Neteyam swiftly placed his large blue cock at your soaked entrance and pushed it all in at once, making you moan loudly in sheer, raw pleasure.
"Eywa, how I missed this pussy! Your ekxìn pussy feels so fucking good, my little tanhì." (star) Neteyam murmured as he thrusted hungrily into you, his big, girthy cock stretching your insides and filling you up completely.
Neteyam's feelings for you were just so strong that he felt like no words would ever be enough to express his emotions so, he was trying to show you how he felt about you by loving your body instead, pouring out all his yearning for you through his kisses, his desperate caresses, his thrusts…
"Tawtute" Neteyam cried out as he thrusted roughly into you "Oeyä muntxate." (my mate) "Mine. All mine, yawntu…" (loved one) He whimpered in your ear, melancholic and driven wild by his desire and ardent affection for you "Nga yawne lu oer." (I love you) "So, so much."
Neteyam's breath was heavy and irregular as he pounded himself into you as hard as he could. He needed you so much, he felt like he would die if he could not have all of you, if he could not claim you once and for all. It was so good that he didn't last long and came inside of you, his thick warm seed shooting strongly towards your womb. He hoped to breed you but he didn't know you were taking birth control pills. Neteyam's load of cum was so big that it leaked out of your cunt even as he was still inside of you. That was so dirty and sexy that your pussy clenched around his cock as you felt his warm liquid leaking out of your stretched entrance.
After cuddling for a while, when you were looking to find your bra that Neteyam had thrown somewhere in the sand, he looked at your breasts, the two of them full of his bite marks and a big beautiful smile adorned his full lips, followed by a joyful chuckle.
“I marked you well, syulang. Now everybody can see that you're mine. Oeyä muntxate. Mine forever.” He leaned in for a kiss, pressing his soft lips on yours, so needy. Neteyam tasted so sweet but so unique at the same time. He tasted like himself. Nothing else could compare.
You chuckled. “You're so pervy.”
“But you love it.” He smiled at you, his sharp fangs more charming than ever
“Hey! Just because I'm your mate now it doesn't mean you get to be all cocky again.” You teased, pretending to be angry, as you pushed his arm away with your hand
Neteyam only smiled wider. He was over the moon that you were now finally his. All his. Until the end of time.
Neteyam yawned, body still in full bliss because of the powerful orgasm you had given him.
“I'm sleepy, oeyä tawtute. Take a nap with me.” He was already grabbing you in his big striped arms and laying you back on the hammock with him.
“You're not giving me a choice, anyway.” You chuckled and yawned too.
Soon your tired eyes fell shut, as you felt his warm breath on your skin.
𓇼
In the middle of the afternoon, you woke up crying, desperately breathing gasping for air. Neteyam woke up startled with your panicking state. Another nightmare... One of those that left your heart aching and your mind confused for long after you woke up, wondering if it had been reality or not.
“What's wrong, yawntu?” (loved one)
When you realized Neteyam was by your side, still holding you against his warm body, you felt relieved but only seemed to cry more. You buried your head on his soft chest and he just let you cry there, petting your head softly with his hand, his slender fingers running through your locks of hair every now and then, trying to comfort you.
Eventually you stopped crying, sniffing one last time. You placed a kiss on Neteyam's chest, your lips lingering on his skin for longer than they normally would, as if to try and make sure that he was really there with you, that he was real and was not going away.
“Wanna tell me what happened now, oeyä muntxate?” (my mate)
You looked up at his face, eyes reddish.
“I had a terrible nightmare…” just the reminder made your heart ache again “I dreamt you left me. You got tired of me and found a better mate.”
“Tawtute… that's never gonna happen.”
“You promise?” You needed to hear him promise…
“I promise.” He tried to kiss you but you backed away a bit
“What if your parents don't approve of us? Will you leave me then?” You hated how clingy and annoying you were sounding
Neteyam started thinking that he would have to have an endless amount of patience with you. Your fear controlled you way too often. He would have to teach you how to be a little more free. But he would do it gladly.
"Listen, yawntutsyìp" (little loved one) Neteyam held your small face inside of both his huge blue hands "We will fight whatever we have to, whatever comes our way, and we will stay together forever, okay? I'm not letting anything separate me from you. Nothing, you hear me? Nothing." He promised you.
You breathed in and decided you had to try and believe him, otherwise you would end up sabotaging your relationship with Neteyam, you would end up contributing to what you feared the most: him leaving you. What you did not know was that there was actually nothing you could do to drive Neteyam away. He had been chasing you for way too long, he had fought for you like he had fought in the war against the Sky People. Neteyam was too much of a good warrior and too proud to let you go after all that. And damn, he could not imagine a life without you. Not a life where he would be happy and fulfilled, at least. He needed you to see the morning air as fresh, to hear the song of the birds as lively, to see the light of the stars as a guide.
“Okay. I trust you, Neteyam.” You stated, utterly sure of your words this time.
𓇼
♡ Epilogue ♡
You felt safe for the first time in so long while Neteyam held you inside his big arms, his body heat spreading all over you. It felt so cozy and just so… right. Like you had finally found what you needed, what you were unconsciously looking for all along.
Safety, trust, shelter… love.
Funny how sometimes when we need love the most is when we push it away the most, hurt the people who are trying to give it to us the most because we're so terrified to get hurt again, to finally trust and be let down again that we would rather keep drowning in our pain and in our loneliness. Pain can feel comfortable, as crazy as it sounds.
Turn a curse into a kiss
You could have never seen it coming, you could have never imagined back on your Earth days that your safe place to fall would be in the arms of an alien in an exoplanet, outside of your home solar system. What a weird happy ending. But it doesn't matter. There's still much more to come. This isn't the end, it's just the beginning.
𓇼
Change the meaning of your world
Love makes no sense, love has no name
Love drowns you in tears and it sets your heart on fire
Love has no fear, love has no reason
So infinitely vast and we're standing at the edge
Take my hand, erase the past forever
Love Exists (Amy Lee)
𓇼
This is the end, guys 🥲🤍 Feels so good to give Teyam and Reader a beautiful happy ending. Thank you all so much for reading my story 💕
•
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Tim came down the stairs with an empty mug in hand. As he entered the dinning room he found a kid happily eating pancakes. Ah this must be the new adoptee, he thought to himself as he recalled last night's group chat.
"This is not a new adoptee," Bruce said looking up from the boy. Man, Tim hated when the old man guessed their thoughts like that.
"Say whatever you need to convince yourself B," Tim replied with a shrug as he went into the kitchen.
Bruce shouted after him, "He already has a family!"
The boy immediately interjected, "She's not my family silly! She's my friend."
Tim chuckled to himself as he filled his mug and came back into the dining room. "Aw B," he said smugly, "he doesn't even have a family. You're not saying we're gonna leave him on the streets are you?"
Bruce for his part, glared halfheartedly at Tim before turning back to the little boy. Tim also took this time to observe the boy. He believed Oracle had said his name was Danny. Danny was currently happily kicking his legs as he stabbed at his pancakes. Tim couldn't help but note how the pancakes had already been cut into bite sized pieces. Other than that, he seemed perfectly fine. No apparent injuries or adverse reactions to sudden movements. His clothes were also nice and clean. Probably Alfred's doing. Speaking of the old butler, he came in and set a plate down in front of Tim.
"Oh I'm not-" One eyebrow raise was enough for the young man to shut his mouth. He looked down at his plate only to immediately turn back to Alfred with an eyebrow raise of his own. "Mister Danny claimed it was not fair he was the only one to receive such special pancakes. He was rather insistent that everyone experiences such happiness this fine morning," Alfred informed.
Ah, that explains why Tim had gotten star shaped pancakes. He looked over at Danny who was smiling giddily at him. As Tim took his first bite of pancake, he couldn't help but agree with that assessment.
Bruce cleared his throat. "Danny?" the boy looked up at him. "As you know our... mutual friend left you in my care. As such after you're finished with your pancakes, what do you say I take you back home?"
"Ok!" the boy replied before shoveling more pancakes into his mouth.
"I think I'll tag along too," Tim said. There was no way this little "drop off" was going to go as planned and he wanted to be there to see it. After all, someone had to keep the group chat updated. Besides, he took great joy in Bruce's half perplexed half annoyed expression.
"Don't you have some meetings to attend today?" Bruce asked through gritted teeth, guessing his son's angle. "Nope," Tim answered sweetly. "My schedule's all clear today."
"Fine," Bruce relented. "If you want to come along on this very quick drop off, I won't stop you."
Tim smiled into his mug. This was gonna be fun.
-----
"We're here!" Danny exclaimed as they pulled up to an abandoned looking apartment building.
"Are you sure this is your home?" Bruce asked cautiously. Tim couldn't blame him, this place was on the outskirts of the Bowery and looked like nobody had lived there in years.
Danny opened the door and hopped out. "Yep!" he said. "I know because I'm a big boy and big boys know how to get home." He puffed out his chest proudly.
"Right," Bruce muttered pensively as he examined the building.
They all entered the building and began ascending the questionable stairs with Danny taking them two steps at a time. As they climbed, both Bruce and Tim noted how rundown the building looked. Walls were peeling and there was rubble and trash all over the floors. The railing on the stairs looked so rusted that a gust of wind could probably knock them over. Most of the lights didn't work because of one thing or another which luckily wasn't a problem considering it was daytime. But none of that was even the most concerning part. No, the most concerning part was how silent it was.
As they walked down the hall, it was simply too silent. Even taking into account that most people would already be at work right now, it was still too quiet. There was no hint of people coming back from work the night shift. No sound of those staying home sick or someone with a day off. No dogs barked, no cats made any noise. It was an eerie silence that seemed to blanket the whole building. It was unnerving.
Danny stopped in front of a door and opened it with ease. There was no lock or anything. Once again adding to the list of concerning evidence. They entered after Danny to discover a shabby looking flat past the door. There was barely any furniture, and the furniture that was there looked like it should have been thrown out years ago. The floor boards seemed as if they would give way at any moment too. The windows to the far side allowed lighted in but that only served to illuminated the mountain of dust everywhere. The apartment didn't even look lived in. There were no clothes anywhere, no dishes, no sort of decorations, nothing.
Danny seemed undeterred by any of this and happily pranced into a room off to the right. Tim followed him as Bruce stayed behind to look around more.
As he entered, Tim was relieved to find that at least this space looked lived in albeit barely. The bed had Superman themed sheets on it and there was a backpack leaning against the closet. The bed also had a blanket laying on top of it which Danny ran to and grabbed. He came back over to show Tim.
"This is my most precious thing!" he explained excitedly. "My friend gave it to me. Feel it! It's super soft."
Tim knelt down and felt the blanket which was black and had stars all over it. "You're right," he said. "It really is soft." Danny beamed. "Told ya!"
Tim smiled at the boy's obvious excitement despite his less than stellar living arrangements. Just then, Bruce called for him. Tim returned to the main room with Danny in tow, still clutching onto his blanket.
Bruce turned to him and handed him a piece of paper with an unreadable expression. The paper had cursive scrall on it that simply read, Take care of him my knights.
Danny looked up at them both curiously and Tim just sighed. So much for this being a quick drop off.
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Update Post
Prologue | AO3
Previous Next
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The excursion in the Batcave hadn't set Danny’s recovery back as much as he'd thought it would, which he was grateful for. He’d missed dinner that day, having slept through it after they had given him additional medication to keep his fever under control. But the next morning he'd still been able to join a few people for breakfast, even if it was a little later than most. It was also a little quieter than usual, with the heavy topic from the previous afternoon weighing on people’s minds.
“...Are you sure you’re still feeling better?” Jazz asked, noting how Danny was absently nibbling on the toast he had with a light cream cheese forgotten on the side.
“Hm?” Danny voiced, twitching his head to look at her before fully registering what she’d asked. “Yeah, I’m okay,” he assured, giving her a brief smile. She didn’t seem convinced though, so he gave her a little more. “I’m just lost in thought, Jazz. Yesterday was… a lot.”
“You mean the part about Raven saying you were probably murdered?” Jason asked, strangely having stayed at the manor that night and stuck around that morning. Cass had ended up starting a hushed conversation that he had adopted these kids as his responsibility since they had shown up closest to his usual patrol grounds, but he wouldn’t comment on it.
“Yeah… Yeah that’s probably the big thing,” Danny agreed with a grimace. Man this guy was blunt. But, also maybe the best one to be commenting about something like this. There were a lot less people around too, maybe it was safe for him to satiate his earlier curiosity. “...I guess out of everyone here you’d … probably understand the most?” Wait, Danielle had said Jason had died before, but she hadn’t said it was murder. “U’unless it was something else that…” Okay this was a lot more awkward than he thought it would be.
“...No, you’re right. I was… murdered,” Jason confirmed, toying with his own cereal for a moment. “But it wasn’t anything crazy magical like you. Just a crowbar and bomb. That and we all know the guy that did it. Piece of shit.”
“Oh…,” Danny responded quietly, thankful that Jazz was decidedly staying quiet and allowing them to converse. “I don’t… Hm… I’m not sure which one I’d prefer honestly,” he admitted with a weak chuckle. “I mean, electrocution is no fun, hurts like a bitch, but… But at least it wasn’t drawn out.”
“...That’s a fair point,” Jason agreed, “I imagine it’s not the part that’s got you so distracted though.”
“...... No… It’s not,” Danny confirmed, lowering his toast as his brows pressed together in smothered guilt. “I…” It was hard to say it aloud, but of anyone he felt like Jason wouldn’t judge him for his thoughts. “S’she said that someone who was there would’ve had to have had the desire to s’sacrifice me or whatever. A’and at the moment I was more angry that she would imply that Clockwork had lied to me, that I - that something had happened that took away my ability to choose. But also… I don’t like what it implies about…”
Jason was quiet as he listened patiently for Danny to voice his thoughts, the words confirming ideas he’d had as well as keying him in on what was bothering Danny. But when he fell quiet before being able to finish voicing his concern Jason filled in what he could guess the worry was. “About who was there with you…?” he half asked, half stated.
Danny flinched when that fact was put in the open, but now that it was it made it easier to add details. “...Sam and Tucker were the only ones there with me.”
“Oh!” Jazz suddenly burst, raising her hands in realization and reaching over to grab Danny, “Oh my gosh! I’m so sorry, we forgot to tell you!”
“What? What!?” Danny sputtered, startled by his sister’s outburst.
“Sam asked Raven about that last night before they left. She was worried that her and Tucker being there could have been seen as them trying to murder you, but Raven said they couldn’t have just been present, they would have had to know about the sacrifice being a payment for the ritual kind of thing and clearly had the intention to kill you,” Jazz rambled quickly. “Sorry! I didn’t think that was what had you so distracted. We were going to tell you last night when you woke up, but you slept through the night.”
Danny had to stare at Jazz in silence while that whirlwind of facts got smashed into his brain. So they had already cleared up that Sam and Tucker hadn’t accidentally murdered him, but forgot to tell him? Well, it was only a few hours later, so maybe he shouldn’t be upset. At least it clarified for certain that his friends hadn’t secretly wanted to kill him. But then it brought him back to the major question that had yet to be answered. “Then who did?!”
That one Jazz didn’t have an answer to, and reluctantly let Danny go to helplessly raise her hands in a shrug. “I don’t know? Maybe no one did? I mean- Mom and Dad couldn’t possibly have accidentally done magic, right?” she attempted with a weak laugh, betraying her own discomfort with the idea that their parents had accidentally done something more dangerous than they’d ever thought.
“No, I think they did,” Danny countered easily, a little miffed.
Jason raised a brow after that, curious what else Danny had realized. “Care to elaborate?” he asked, half because he wanted the answer and half to give Jazz a chance to process what Danny had said.
Danny did not actually want to elaborate, he didn’t want to pull up memories of that afternoon again. But he did realize it was important, and therefore forced himself to answer. “The portal… After drawing that diagram out yesterday, and remembering some things, I realized Raven… might have some merit to what she’s saying,” he admitted, pouting a bit reluctantly since he’d been so ready to discredit her before. “The portal didn’t turn on when I went inside it. It was when I put my-... put my hand on the wall. There was a switch that I knocked, and I realized… it was located at one of the concentration points I drew on the diagram. So I probably completed the circuit by accident, and made it so the stupid ritual thing was complete,” he explained, absently raising his left hand as he recalled the memory.
“...Oh….,” Jason grunted, having not expected that. So this kid’s parents probably really had accidentally mixed science with magic, and Danny had ended up half killed because of it. But despite that, Jason was curious. “Okay… so maybe someone did want to kill you, maybe they actually didn’t. It really sounds like happenstance from what I’ve heard. Does it matter if someone wanted to kill you?” He already knew the answer, but he was curious if Danny would surprise him and actually admit it didn’t matter.
“Of course it matters!” Danny sputtered, bringing a fist to the table. “I want to punch them in the face for ruining my life for the past two years! Do you know how hard it is to get into NASA? I just wanted to be an astronaut and go to space - the literal coolest thing ever to exist - but now my grades are shit and I’m barely passing highschool because of all these ghosts and people think I’m stupid because of it!”
Jason couldn’t help it. After staring at Danny with slightly wide eyes in shock at the outburst, Jason couldn’t help the laugh that escaped him. Though part of it was because Tim had just walked into the dining room and nearly dropped his plate of breakfast and cup of juice after also being startled at Danny’s outburst. Danny was about to get cross with Jason for laughing, but only spared him the lecture when he also noticed Tim there.
“Oh- Sorry- I didn’t mean to startle you,” Danny apologized quickly.
Tim just sighed, grateful only a little of the juice had spilled onto the floor. “It’s fine, just give me your napkin,” he directed, setting his breakfast on the table and reaching out for the requested object. Once he had it, wiping up the spilled juice was a quick task, and he was sinking into the chair next to Danny with another sigh. “You’re not stupid, by the way. If you really need the academic records for the job you want, just test out. I’m sure you’ll be fine, and get flying colors. I can get you a study packet if you want,” he commented casually, taking a large bite out of a sausage.
Not only was the comment unexpected, but it also sounded like a flat out lie from someone who had no idea what it was like to struggle at school. “...Yeah, sure. I’ll get right on that,” Danny scoffed sarcastically, going back to nibble on his toast.
“Danny…,” Jazz hushed gently, sympathetic and immediately ready to comfort him.
“I’m serious,” Tim enforced before she could say more. “Well, I dunno how you are with english or something like that, but you’ve got great math and science aptitude.”
Danny just stared at Tim incredulously, not buying it.
So Tim threw a hand in the air and rolled his eyes. “You just recreated a complex concept schematic from memory within a 90 to 95% accuracy range on the measurements and functions, while high on morphine and fever,” he pointed out. “Also, if you’re any good at being a vigilante like everyone has been implying, you’ve got to have great problem solving skills. And that’s hard to teach.”
Danny was now openly staring in surprise, because he hadn’t realized he’d done anything that Tim said. At least, not when phrased in that manner. It wasn’t like he could discredit Tim’s words either, they had all been there as he’d drawn the schematic. “I…” He should probably say something, but he couldn’t think of a single response other than to stare blankly in surprise at the table in front of him.
It caused Tim to sigh again, slumping into his hand and rubbing his brow. “Honestly, if there’s anything you’re dumb in it’s self awareness. I’d switch out a dozen of the interns in engineering for you in a heartbeat.”
Okay, so maybe Tim wasn’t actually pulling his leg, or trying to prank him. If Danny’s cheeks weren’t already red from illness they would definitely be from embarrassment as he shyly sank down in his chair.
Jason laughing that hard wasn’t helping either.
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Okay I'm gonna fully admit this chapter was unplanned and full of stuff I actually didn't think I'd get to include 'cause I just could not figure out how to naturally include them in conversation in the previous chapter or any future scenes I could think of at the moment. But then I started working on this next chapter and within the first paragraph was like '......oh..... oh it all fits rather nicely right here actually. |DDD'
So that was fun XD
And then this took awhile to actually post because I hyper fixated and wrote about 11,000 words for this fic of just scattered, disconnected scenes for future chapters all the way to about the end @ v @ I'm excited.
In other topics, I had a request/question if Conner Kent would show up, and I wouldn't mind giving him a cameo, but I am very confused about what his personality is like. 8'DD Can someone info dump on me about him and his relationship with other characters? There's one that had a black t shirt with the superman symbol and he's like this angsty angry guy that I honestly don't find all that interesting and would be hard to write. But then there's this flashy leather jacket flirty boy with a different flavor of angst and fun that I find a little more interesting. But I'm curious what the DPxDC fandom seems to favor more. Are Conner and Clark dad and son relationship? Does Conner get along with Jon? He's friends with Bart, Tim and Cassie yeah? Feel free to link me to google docs, or recommend movies or comics to me |D This boy is a little harder for me to figure out than the other characters.
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Tag list: @galaxy-sharks-and-bottled-ships, @starscreamlover, @nerdynonnativenarnian, @dragongoblet, @megacharizardx99
@bellathecatastrophe, @cj-ghostemoji-destielpie, @asexual-insomniac, @wolfeyedwitch, @tkiesai,
@fanaroff, @raven1508, @nebulainajar, @serasvictoria02, @oliocelottafanfics,
@honeysuckletook, @omniithe-deer, @wolf-under-the-stars, @gingernutcalo, @that-random-fangirl,
@op-sys-chaos, @kirasigncomics, @ehobep, @paranoid-ira
#my art#writing#dpxdc#dcxdp#dp x dc#dc x dp#phantom rogues#long post#mentions of death#trauma#mention of murder
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Hi literally get so excited when you update! Can you write one where charles x alexandra x reader where charles and alex are away for an event and forget that it's the reader birthday ans only remember when someone tells them birthday it and they try and make it up to her.
Hi loves. I hope you enjoy this little piece. Let me know what you think. Comments are always apreciated!I'm sorry,but the Sydney Sweeny picture was perfect, so I had to include it😉
Also, question (and please answer me that in the comments), does anyone read what I write before the story? Like the little message here? I'm just curious❤️
Enjoy reading and send me requests!!❤️
-XoXo
The Birthday disaster
You couldn’t believe it. They weren’t here. They didn’t call, text, or even send you a freaking letter. Your own boyfriend and girlfriend forgot your birthday. And not just any birthday, it was your 21 birthday. Instead of celebrating with Alex, Charles, and all of your friends in a vibrant club, you were sitting on the balcony of your apartment. Despite the cold wind hitting your bare skin mercilessly, thanks to the cute short dress you wore today, you couldn’t bring yourself to walk back inside.
Of course, your friends tried to get you to come out with them to celebrate your birthday properly. But it just hurt too much, and to be honest, your mind was too tired and sad for any kind of festivity.
When Charles and Alex first informed you about the event hosted by one of Alex’s friends, they eagerly asked you to join them. Unfortunately, your job didn’t allow you to tag along, which both of them understood. However, they promised you that they would return today at around 5 o’clock. To be honest, you thought they had something special planned for your birthday. But last night, at around 11 pm, you received a text from Alex, informing you that they would be staying longer in Venice, where the event was held.
At first, you thought this was some kind of joke. Maybe they wanted you to think that they weren’t able to celebrate with you, only to surprise you with a birthday party. But sadly, when you woke up this morning, nothing happened. Throughout the day, there was complete silence between you and them.
Your group of friends, who had been with you a few hours ago to at least celebrate your birthday a little bit, tried to convince you to go out and party with them. Before you could agree, you got a notification from Instagram. You were tagged quite often in a post showing Alex and Charles at the event. They looked so happy and carefree, making you feel even more numb.
Despite their best efforts, your friends left after half an hour, after you reassured them with phrases like “Yes, I will take care of myself,” “Yes, I will call you if I need anything,” and “No, you don’t have to worry about me. I’m completely fine.” They knew you were anything but fine; however, they also knew that you needed to be alone right now.
So here you are, sitting alone in the cold with your only companions being the vodka bottle you brought with you and the relentless wind hitting your skin. “Happy fucking 21st birthday to me, I guess,” you muttered to yourself, staring out at the sea.
“Oh my god, Lisa. You truly outdid yourself,” complimented Alex, her friend. And it was true. The event was filled with beautiful flowers and lights, giving the room a fairy-like appearance. The soft glow of the lights reflected off the petals, creating a magical ambiance that made everyone feel like they had stepped into an enchanted garden. Charles, who stood next to his girlfriend, only brought her closer to him and said, “Yeah, I have to agree. I’m 100% sure YN would have loved it.” “You are so right, love. I wish she was here with us,” agreed Alex, her voice tinged with a hint of sadness.
“Wait, I’m confused. So there is nothing wrong between you guys and YN?” asked Lisa, her brow furrowed in confusion. Alex and Charles shared a look with each other, both of them equally puzzled. “No, why would there be anything wrong with us?” Alex replied, her tone defensive. “Oh, I just thought you had a fight and this is the reason why you are here and not with YN today. But I must have been wrong…” Linda’s voice trailed off, her cheeks flushing with embarrassment. She shared a look with her partner Mary, both of them realizing the gravity of the situation.
“Wait, stop. Pause. Why would we be with YN tonight? You invited us to your event and we are here. I don’t get what’s going on right now,” said Alex, her frustration mounting. It felt like Mary and Lisa knew something she and Charles didn’t. Mary, who was now also becoming more annoyed with how the two of them acted before them, didn’t take any nonsense from Alex.
Without hesitation, she looked straight into Alex’s eyes and told her with an ice-cold voice, “Well, we weren’t expecting you to show up today because we thought that you would be busy celebrating YN’s 21 birthday today. But from the looks of it, it seems like you forgot your own girlfriend’s birthday. So don’t talk to us with that rude tone of yours. At least we remember each other’s birthdays.” With that, Mary took Lisa by the hand and left, leaving Alex and Charles standing there in stunned silence.
Alex and Charles were left behind, both staring at the space where the couple used to be a few seconds ago. Both of them felt a wave of guilt and shame wash over them. How could they forget their own girlfriend’s birthday? Turning on their phones, they saw the flood of messages they had received from not only their fans but also their friends, YN’s friends, and their families. Each message was a painful reminder of their oversight.
“We messed up so badly,” muttered Charles, looking at Alex with a pained expression. The woman could only nod, still speechless. Charles took her arm and gently but firmly led her out of the room. “We have to go to her. ASAP,” Alex told Charles, who was already a step ahead of her and had their jackets in hand. With that, the couple left the event, both feeling a deep sense of remorse. How could they forget their girl’s birthday?
As they hurried to their car, Alex’s mind raced with thoughts of how to make it up to YN. She knew it would take more than just an apology to mend the hurt they had caused. Charles, too, was lost in his thoughts, thinking of ways to show YN how much she meant to them. They both knew that they had a lot of making up to do, but they were determined to do whatever it took to make things right.
At around 1 am, the couple finally arrived home. The ride back had been silent, the air in the car feeling oppressively thick, making it hard to breathe. They parked their car in the garage and, without hesitation, jumped out of the vehicle, racing towards the elevator. The few minutes it took to reach their front door felt like an eternity, each second stretching painfully.
When they entered the apartment, everything was shrouded in darkness. A figure sat on the balcony, barely visible in the dim light. Charles immediately sat next to YN, while Alex kneeled in front of her. YN didn’t even look at them before taking a gulp from the nearly empty bottle of vodka. “Hey love, I think you’ve had enough for tonight,” whispered Charles, gently trying to take the bottle away from the now 21-year-old girl.
YN shook her head, her voice trembling as she reminded them, “No. NO, you do not get to tell me what I can and cannot do. Not after you forgot about me.” “Baby, we didn’t forget about you,” Alex tried, her eyes already filling with tears. YN only laughed, her own tears streaming down her face. “No, Alexandra. You do not get to tell me that after you forgot my birthday, and you certainly don’t get to cry.” “Ok, let’s all calm down,” Charles attempted again, his voice soothing but firm.
“No Charles! I don’t want to calm down. You both forgot about me. You two promised me that something like this would never happen to us. You promised me that you would always love me. You promised me that the age gap didn’t bother you when we started dating when I was 19. But look at us. You already broke one of your promises. How can I be sure that you won’t break another one?” With that, YN broke down in tears. Her whole body shook with the force of her sobs, her head held in her hands.
Charles and Alex immediately moved to comfort her. “YN, breath. We are so freaking sorry. I guarantee you, we didn’t mean for something like this to happen. We were all so busy with our jobs and social lives that we didn’t mean to forget something so important,” Charles began, his voice filled with regret.
Alex took YN’s head into her hands, gently wiping away her tears. “We love you more than anything in this world. You are our air and our heart. And we will apologize for the rest of our lives if we have to,” she said, her voice breaking with emotion. YN only whispered, “I love you guys too.” Alex didn't hesitate before kissing her girlfriend. after a moment the they pulled apart.
Charles turned her face towards him, speaking softly, “And we didn’t lie when we told you the age gap didn’t bother us. And we certainly didn’t lie when we promised you that we would always love you, ok?” After YN nodded, Letting Charles also kiss her. This kiss was filled with as much love as Alex, just a bit more urgently but still gentle. After their kiss, the three of them cuddled close to each other, finding solace in their shared warmth.
It would take some time before everything was alright between the three of them again. But for now, sitting together and watching the city lights flicker in the distance was the perfect way to start healing.
#formula 1#formula 1 x reader#charles leclerc x reader#charles leclerc x alexandra saint mleux x reader#charles leclerc#charles leclerc x female reader#charles leclerc x you#charles leclerc x female oc#-XoXo#xoxo babygirl 💋
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You're jealous but you can't do anything because you're not dating him (Part 7) - Wakatoshi Ushijima
Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4 | Part 5 | Part 6
Pairing: Ushijima x Fem! reader
Genre: Angst to fluff
Warnings: none, really? Reader calls him Toshi.
Requested by: @ushisrever
A/N: Can't believe I posted the last update to this more than two years ago. Has it really been that long???? The incomplete series has been bothering me for two years now lmao. Didn't think I'd ever find a fitting scenario for Ushiwaka but thanks to @dira333 helping me sound off some ideas, I was able to get that perfect "snap!" you get when you fit a puzzle piece in perfectly. Gave me enough brain juice to write this out before going back into hibernation.
Serving you some fresh, hot angst and then some lol. Enjoy the burn and then the healing. For someone who was as far removed from Ushiwaka (emotionally) as one can, writing this actually made me see him in a new light. Loved writing him. Hopefully, it stays as true to his canon nature as it can. Hopefully I don't trash this before it's out💀 but if you're reading this, it's good lol.
It feels like the entire Shiratorizawa is at the gates of the school.
"I can't believe she's coming to our school!"
"AAA I can't stop imagining how she'll look in our school uniform."
"Do you think she already has a boyfriend? Maybe I have a chance?"
"I don't know about a boyfriend but you certainly don't have a chance with her."
"Must you always be so cruel?!"
"If you think a star child actor who has made it so big in the industry is going to date a simpleton like you, you're delusional."
You sigh, annoyed, as you try to make your way through the babbling crowd. You're already late for your morning classes and you couldn't care any less about Hoshiko Nakamura. Or any celebrity for that matter.
"In fact, I don't think any boy in this school has a chance with her. Hmm... except maybe Ushiwaka? Not that he'd be interested in dating her anyway. Sometimes I feel like that guy doesn't have any emotions at all."
Your ears perk up at the Ace's name.
Wakatoshi Ushijima has become somewhat of a celebrity at school ever since he was selected for the under 19 representative for Japan in the Youth World Championship.
He was already well known as the formidable volleyball player who crushes any team that he takes on. However, his serious and stoic nature has kept most people from approaching him. Till now, at least.
The girl was right. Wakatoshi wouldn't even think about dating anyone. You seem fairly sure of that. However, the suggestion still leaves a bad taste in your mouth.
You're wrong about him not having any emotions you think as you finally break free from the crowd and sprint towards your classroom.
You've known Wakatoshi for as long as you can remember. You remember when his family moved into the house next to yours when you were just little kids. You remember watching the reserved, determined figure of the boy practicing volleyball all by himself in the nearby park. You remember going up to him and offering to play with him. Out of all these memories, the most vivid of them all was the way his eyes subtly lit up when you said you wanted to play with him.
Time has blurred into a haze since then. Even though you both went to different schools all through junior and middle school years, you both kept alive the tradition of playing volleyball together in park.
"You should come to Shiratorizawa," he had said that fateful day. You both were in the last year of middle school. It was a beautiful evening as you both walked back home from the park, the setting sun throwing hues of red and gold across the partially cloudy sky.
"That's not in my hands. I tried in middle school, remember? I want Shiratorizawa but Shiratorizawa doesn't seem to want me," you said, kicking a pebble on the road. Funny how I could say the same about you.
"That was three years ago. You have grown," he said without pause.
"We'll see. I don't want to get my hopes too high. You know just as well as I do that they give preference to athletes over normal students like me. Casual volleyball games with you are just about as sporty as I get," you said as you reached out to open the gate to your home.
You turned to say goodbye to him and found him looking at you, his expression more serious than usual.
"It's not about athleticism."
"Shiratorizawa only accepts the best. Be it volleyball or anything else. I believe you fit into that category. You should come," he says, looking straight into your eyes.
Your stomach flutters. How could he have so much faith in you? There is no doubt that he believes in you because Wakatoshi Ushijima always means what he says. Almost 5 years of knowing him had taught you that. You still found it hard to digest, though.
"I'll try my best, I promise."
"I know you will."
"Class, please give a warm welcome your new classmate, Hoshiko Nakamura!"
You can't help but gawk at her. Saying she is pretty would be a severe understatement. If she looks pretty on screen, it is nothing compared to what she looks like off screen. You look at your desk partner to see if he is thinking the same. Wakatoshi, however, seems to simply be listening to the teacher.
"Miss Nakamura, I'm sure you will have no problem settling in here. To kind of help you settle in this new environment, I was thinking of seating you next to Ushijima as I believe you two have met before at some of the national events."
The teacher might as well have thrown a bus at you and it would have felt just about the same as you do now.
Hoshiko's face lights up. "That would be great. Wakatoshi-kun has always been a delight to be with. Thank you for having me," she says and bows.
Did she just call him by his first name?
"Ah, Y/N, sorry for springing this on you so suddenly. I wanted to get a hold of you before morning class but couldn't. I hope it's not a problem," the teacher says.
You force a polite smile. "It's not a problem at all," you say and start packing your bag.
Hoshiko walks up to the desk and waits patiently for you to gather your stuff, thanking you again.
Your legs feel heavy as you take the empty seat diagonal to them in the adjacent row.
I'm panicking for no reason. They just know each other from an event. It makes sense to make her sit with a familiar and safe person, given her popularity. Yes, Wakatoshi is definitely the ideal choice in this scenario. He is not someone who would be creepy in any sense. He's also strong and intimidating so it would keep the creeps away. It's fine. It'll be fine. Nothing is going to happen between them... right?
"Wakatoshi-kun, I'm so glad I got to sit next to you," she says, smiling at him, speaking loud enough for people sitting nearby to hear.
"Actually, if I'm being honest, when I decided to come back to my hometown to complete my studies, I knew I wanted to go to Shiratorizawa immediately," she continues.
"Of course. Shiratorizawa is the best school in the prefecture. It's only natural to want to study here," Ushijima says, completely seriously.
Hoshiko blushes. "Ah... that is not what I meant... nevermind," she says, causing the guy behind them to burst into laughter.
It seems like the hollow sensation growing in your stomach is here to stay.
It has been two months since the day Hoshiko joined your school. With Ushijima going to school earlier than usual and practicing late into the night for the Inter High preliminaries, he hasn't been able to spend much time with you lately. Normally, this wouldn't have bothered you because you could see him in class everyday but with Hoshiko now taking your place, you barely get to say more than hi to him.
However, with the prelims now over and the upcoming week-long break ahead, you're hoping to get some one-on-one time with him once again. All these years with him have made him such an intrinsic part of your daily life that it feels like something big is missing when he's not around. To the world, Wakatoshi Ushijima might be a lot of things. But to you, Wakatoshi Ushijima is home. He is comfort. He is strength. He is someone that you know like the back of your own hand. He is someone that your heart always keeps coming back to. He is the only love you have ever known.
You know that he doesn't share the same feelings for you. But that doesn't stop your heart from longing for him.
The lessons for the day are over and you walk back to your class, eager to pack your bag and go home with Ushijima. You wonder if he'll want to go to the park in the evening.
"She's asking him out! She's asking him out!"
"No WAY! I am SO jealous."
A small crowd has gathered around the window and they're whispering amongst themselves as they look outside.
"Man, that Ushiwaka is so lucky! He gets to date the most beautiful girl in the entire country."
"I mean… he is in the nation's top 3 aces and an under 19 representative of Japan. Not to mention he's tall and strong and good looking. They're actually perfect for each other."
Your heart drops down to your feet.
You look out the window and find yourself looking at Hoshiko and Ushijima standing a ways away from the school building. They're in a quiet, secluded spot and Hoshiko seems to be blushing as she says something to him. You see him nod and say something in return. Hoshiko's face lights up in pure delight and even though they are at a distance, you can hear the joy in her voice.
"No way!!!! He said yes?? I thought he wasn't interested in girls!"
"Goddamn it! There goes my chance!"
You feel dizzy as you watch the two of them walk back to school together.
No. This can't be. You have always known that he doesn't like you that way. But you thought he wasn't interested in dating at all.
No. You shouldn't make any assumptions just yet. These gossip mongers are messing with your head. For all you know, he could have said yes to being in a show or something. You shouldn't despair before you hear the truth from him.
You blink back your tears and run to your class. Thankfully, it's empty. You take a few deep breaths to calm yourself and wait. Both of them soon appear in the hallway. The crowd surrounds them instantly, wanting to drown them in questions but Ushijima breaks away from them easily and walks towards the class. He comes up to you.
"Y/N. I'm sorry I won't be able to come to the park today."
It's true.
"Hoshiko and I are going to watch this new movie playing at the theatre-"
He's going on a date with her.
"Apparently it has a lot of volleyball in it-"
He's going on a date with h-
"You should join us."
Huh?
"What?"
"I figured you might like it since you play volleyball with me even though you don't play it otherwise."
What? What? What?? What is happening right now??
Ushijima patiently waits for your answer.
"Uh... Whose idea was it to go to the movie?"
"Nakamura's. Why?"
"And how did she bring up the idea?"
"Well, I was returning from the club and she asked to speak to me in private. And then she told me about the movie and if I wanted to watch it with her."
He didn't get it.
"Ah... Toshi... I'm pretty sure she was asking you out on a date."
His eyes widen with surprise.
"A... date? But she never said she had romantic feelings for me."
Could this mean...? Can I hope...?
"Well, her asking you out on the date was her way of saying it."
"I see. I didn't realise. Thank you for telling me. In that case, I should tell her my feelings for her as well."
He has feelings for her.
Your heart shatters.
You're glad that he walks out right away because you couldn't have stopped your tears from coming out even if you wanted to. You run out of the back door, desperate to get far away.
I guess I was the problem all this time. I just wasn't someone you could look at that way.
You had always known that. You had always known that he didn't feel for you the way you did. But that hadn't stopped you from falling for him. Hard. How could you have not? Eight years of knowing him... You didn't even realise when you fell for him. Loving him just came so naturally to you.
Logically, it makes sense. They make sense. She is beautiful and tall and smart. And so is he. They are the type of couple who would be featured on the cover of a magazine. Which, given their career trajectories, is bound to happen sooner or later.
But the heart doesn't care for logic and at this moment you feel like it will actually burst from the amount of pain you're feeling.
You spend the rest of the evening and the entire night crying in your room.
Morning comes and you feel worse than ever. Your head is throbbing, your nose is stuffy and your eyes are swollen. You decide to skip school. It's the last day before break anyway. Maybe this break will be good for you. It will give you some time to adjust to everything and compose yourself.
You go back to bed and sleep through the entire day.
You thought you'd feel better after getting some rest but you still feel like shit.
You drag yourself out of bed. Your entire body feels like it weighs ten times more.
Maybe a shower and some fresh air will do you good.
You head out.
No matter how much you try to think of something else, your mind keeps coming back to him. Your eyes keep searching for him. You look in the direction of his room. The curtains are open and you can see it is empty.
Of course he's not home yet. He's probably out with her again.
Even though it's barely a minute away, you feel exhausted by the time you reach the park. Thankfully, it is empty.
You sit on one of the swings and look around. Most of your memories with Ushijima are tied to this park. This is where you both have spent the majority of your last eight years together.
All the sweet memories make you tear up again.
"You didn't come to school today."
You were so lost in your head that you didn't realise when he walked up to you. You blink back your tears.
"Oh... hi. Yeah, I - I wasn't feeling very well today," you say, not meeting his eye.
"You seem upset."
He noticed.
"Oh... I'm fine. Really. It's just been a rough day. It's nothing to worry about," you say, still evading his gaze.
He sits on the swing next to you. You look to the side and see he has a volleyball in his lap.
"Do you want to talk about it?"
You quickly avert your gaze again.
"No."
"I see. Well, would you like me to distract you? Talk about something else?"
It is getting harder to keep your tears in check. You're sure your voice will crack if you speak. You just nod.
"You would've liked the movie. It wasn't as focused on volleyball as Nakamura said it would-"
Great. He's chosen the worst topic he could have talked about. You don't want to hear about his date. You need to change the topic. Quickly.
"What are you doing here?" you blurt out the one question that has been weighing on your mind ever since he came here.
"What do you mean? I came here to play volleyball with you."
"I- I mean... I thought you would spend your free time with Ho-Hoshiko from now."
"Why would I do that?"
"B- because you're d-dating her?" Your voice cracks.
"I am not dating Nakamura."
What?
"What do you mean you're not dating her? I thought you liked her. Didn't you go on a date with her yesterday?"
"I do like her. Just not romantically. And no, I went to watch the movie with Tendou. She had already bought the tickets so I bought them from her. I wanted to watch it with you but you went home. "
"But... you left to tell her your feelings for her..."
"I did. I wanted to clarify that I only feel for her as a friend. It was only thanks to you that I was able to tell her in time before I ended up hurting her unintentionally."
"I...see..."
Relief floods your heart. You suddenly feel a hundred pounds lighter. You finally gather the courage to look at him. He is looking right back at you.
"Can I ask you something?" you say, your lower lip trembling.
"Of course."
"Do you have romantic feelings for anyone?"
You instantly regret speaking up as soon as the question leaves your mouth. You know he never lies. And if he doesn't feel the same w-
"Yes. You."
You stare at him blankly.
It's subtle but his expression has changed from completely serious to something a little softer. You can't quite place what it is. Is it concern? nervousness? Adoration?
"R-really? You like me? Romantically?"
"Yes."
"Since when?"
"Ah," he rubs his chin, "I'm not sure..."
You're still having difficulty believing that any of this is real.
"You know," he continues, "After my father, you were the first person who ever wanted to play with me."
He points towards the corner of the park. "I was practicing against that wall that day when you came up to me. Do you remember?"
"Of course I remember. I can never forget that day."
"So many people have come and gone from my life but you have been with me for so long that, I guess somewhere along the way I just assumed you would stay forever. Which, I now realise, I shouldn't have."
He feels the same. He has always felt the same.
"Toshi?"
He turns to you again.
"I love you."
He breaks into a soft smile.
"I love you too."
Holyshit this was a ride. I'm glad I wrote this and I hope you guys enjoy.
Reblogs appreciated. Please do not steal or repost.
Taglist: @pinkiipeachiikeen @duckymcdoorknob @kakiwrites @ebiharachan @r0binscript I wasn't sure if you guys still want to be tagged for this series, seeing that it has been over two years so let me know if you want me to remove you from the taglist.
Check out THIS POST to know what all characters I have written for in this series.
MASTERLISTS | If you enjoy my work and want to, you can Buy me a Kofi!
#wakatoshi ushijima#ushijima wakatoshi#Haikyuu#haikyuu x reader#haikyuu!!#ushijima x reader#wakatoshi x reader#ushijima wakatoshi x reader#wakatoshi ushijima x reader#ushiwaka#jealous series#ushijima headcanons#ushijima imagines#shiratorizawa#hq!!#haikyuu imagines#Ushijima x you
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i haven't posted a really poorly drawn thought piece adventure in years so here's a brief update!
hope i hit the read more thing right oh well anyway:
"Spent a lot of time applying for a home loan. I had to pay -fucked up- to have a convincing income for a decent loan. It was very confusing but cody helped me a lot."
"Cody proposed to me It felt wonderful that someone wanted to share their time and love with me. Cody proposed Anthrohio weekend, it's the con we really met at."
"We saw the listing that sunday morning before we had to go to our table to vend."
"It was a perfect house. We were the first people to view it and we immediately put in a bid. And we got the house. Many papers to sign."
"Moving was not easy. It took 2 whole months. Cody was out of town helping their grandma recover from a big surgery and we had to sell their old house/move that as well as move from my apartment. ALSO THE PETS: My cat dick wolf + Cody's 3 birds. Until we could get some doors installed and separate the house, I had to live between two places every day to feed and care for them."
"Still, life was good. I bought my first house! It has a swing in the backyard. I've never had my own backyard. I've never even lived somewhere that had trees (in said yard) It felt nice. Living together with the love of my life and 4 pets."
"Through all this i never closed my shop. How could I? It was my income, and I just bought a house. It needed to stay open. Moving that much inventory, setting up a new office, the house is a nice size but it's not huge, so, very careful organizing had to be executed if I wanted my apparel laid out right. (Which I totally managed to do)"
"but i Did get really good at baking pies. the two are connected."
"sacred_crow on instagram!"
"there's like 25 of u bastards i would absolutely die for, and about 75 more that i would go nearly dead over."
"We have an extra bedroom so I got to turn it into a toy room. There's games, crafts, stuffed animals, movies, a sick loft I painted the shit out of. It rules. It brings me a lot of Joy."
"Under the loft we have a dug out where we can watch VHS tapes. I love to sit with Cody and watch movies and play Donkey Kong."
"I am not good at Banjo Kazooie, but Cody is. Cody is so talented. I love watching them play games. (Depicted is not banjo kazooie but donkey kong country 2 as we are currently playing that. I'm good at DKC but I will still swear and make sounds like im about to throw up)"
"Half the basement is finished, so we turned it into a dual office space. It rules. Cody has a whole side for fursuit crafting, and my side is mostly my gigantic gamer computer area/shipping area. I took a whole wall to put all my non apparel merch like pins charms and notebooks also. for hte love of god someone buy the notebooks they take up more space then i wanted"
"I love to look over from my computer and see cody working. They always look so focused, yet peaceful."
"It's winter but it rains. I miss the snow. I lived by the lakes growing up. I miss piles of snow. It's just wet and cold here. Yes i'm quite aware of global warming"
"I got kicked off both my health and car insurance. I fixed the car one but health insurance still no. All my meds have gone away. The past few months have been hard. I think way too much lately. I can't get myself to do anything. -this is a whole page of downer bullshit and i cropped it!-"
"We had a leaky ceiling that took a month to fix. Cody did all the work because they are smart and kind."
"Oh yeah I had my uterus removed earlier this year. They let me keep it. It's in a jar in my living room."
"We threw a very nice halloween party. I was the green m&m. Cody was the monarch."
"We adopted 8 beautiful kiwis from a crane machine at the mall. we spent over 100 monies to get them but it was worth it."
"
It was a rough year. My health is in decline. Our country may try to end my life for being trans soon (lol?) I am in hte middle of a colossal mental breakdown of my core fundamental behavior (depression advanced) BUT ALSO: I am engaged to my favorite person. We bought a house together. I'm beginning a new chapter of my life. I have a swing in my backyard. The negatives suck but there are also many positives. The cycle of emotions is immense, but there is beauty in it. There is beauty in life, and isn't that wonderful?"
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Picking Up Pieces That Aren't Yours
Chapter three- Closer
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Pairing: Tara Carpenter x Fem!Reader
Warning: Explicit, Warning 18+ content, swearing, fingering (Tara receiving), kissing.
Word Count: 2.3k+
A/N: Hey, lovelies, needed to update this real bad. BEAR WITH ME YALL, this is my first like smut that I have basically officially put out there. I hope you guys enjoy it and honestly, I was very nervous to post this update but I have left you guys starved of this story for too long. Making this chapter was a rollercoaster of emotions for me, I did not know that writing smut could be so bashful or even sheepish, but it really was. Good news as well, Make it Right will have an update soon! Very nervous to put this chapter out there but it was going to happen sooner or later. By the way, for future reference, this will be a g!p reader. Just letting you guys know that. Thank you so much for all the support and this one's for you guys!
Proof read.
Minors DNI
╰┈➤ Series Masterlist
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Your head felt like it had been reeling since the moment that you and Tara were back in contact. You felt wrong for allowing her to get the better of you when she had been somewhat intoxicated. The guilt was practically eating at you because not only had you hooked up with her, you couldn’t stop thinking about it. Throughout each of your classes, every time you tried to force yourself to focus on the teacher's words or even the work in front of you, all you could think about was that night.
Your mind was plagued by all that the shorter girl had become under your touch. It felt selfish to have done such a thing and still think of her this way afterwards. No matter how long you tried to shove every image of the girl that night, heat pooled in your lower stomach. It was undeniable. Yet, every time that you had been around the girl from then on, you felt the care for her far stronger than any lust. It was easy to create a fantasy of her but when it came down to it, face to face, all you could do was want to protect her and care for her any way that you could.
“You stare a lot.” Tara said with a hum, she hadn’t even been looking up. She was instead focused on the textbook in front of her, still she felt your eyes on her.
“Ah, sorry..” You replied bashfully as you let out a small breath. Part of you wondered if she had even remembered that night. Maybe she had been angry that when she woke up, you hadn’t been there.
The thing was that when you had woken up the next morning after that night, the more you stared at her peacefully sleeping face, the more guilty you felt for having let yourself lose control. You’d spent an hour that morning, wondering what you should do before having finally settled on leaving some water bottles on her nightstand as well as some pain-killers to take when she’d wake up to a headache she would be bound to have. You didn’t know whether she’d remember, so you left a simple note saying that you had taken care of her the previous night.
“I wasn’t saying that I was bothered by it,” Tara said as her eyes flicked up to where you were sitting in front of her.
“Oh..” Was all you could think to muster up in reply. Should you ask if she remembered? Should you wait until she brings it up? You didn’t want to be a dick and make her think that she was a simple hookup and that was all.
An awkward silence fell upon the both of you as the two of you continued to study. That was until the silence was broken by Tara.
“So…” She began as she scribbled some notes into her notebook, her eyes pried away from yours at all cost, “Do you remember-”
“Yes.” You replied, not even knowing if she was asking what you were thinking she was asking. Her eyebrow had momentarily shot up at the quick reply.
“You didn’t even let me finish.” She said with a light laugh, “Unless, something’s on your mind?”
“Uh,” Your throat suddenly felt dry as you tried to think of the right words to use, “What happened a couple of nights ago..?”
“Hm.”
Her reply seemed too dry. Maybe she didn’t want to talk about it? Maybe she was in fact angry at you for having left?
“What?”
“I just..thought you didn’t remember, that’s all.”
“Of course, I do.” Your reply felt pathetic to your own ears. It left you feeling as if you were desperate. Despite your inner thoughts, a small smile played on her lips.
A silence fell upon the both of you before you had spoken up again, “I’m sorry for leaving that morning. I didn’t know if you’d want to.. I don’t know. I guess I didn’t know if you’d want to remember what had happened.”
“I’ve always thought of you too sweet, that’s why I felt a bit suspicious of it.”
“I’m not the type to do that, I promise. I just thought it was more on your end… I was confused, you know? Confused if you think it's a one-time mistake.”
“Doesn’t have to be. I mean, I don’t think it was a mistake. I’m sort of…glad it was you.”
You felt your heart almost beat out of your chest at the revelation that you hadn’t thought about. It felt like what you had heard was a part of another restless dream where Tara felt the same way about you. For a moment, you were stuck in your thoughts as you contemplated whether or not this was a dream or a joke. That was until you felt your pencil being taken from your hand as you turned your head to look over at the girl, you were sure that now you had somehow died and been sent to heaven.
The look in her eyes, she was close enough for you to count every freckle that adorned her cheeks perfectly. The way her lips had slightly twitched as if she were about to speak but instead decided not to. The two of you spent a moment staring at each other, your face drawing impossibly closer to hers. The feeling of her breath mingling against your own, her eyes darted down at your lips allowed your mind to begin wandering places. Taking action to one of those many thoughts as you shut your eyes and leaned forward into a kiss.
After feeling Tara returning your kiss, you hummed into the kiss, leaning into the touch of her hand on your cheek. You felt weak, weaker than you ever had. It felt almost helpless the way that your mind couldn’t draw any other thought but the dark haired girl kissing you. Kissing you as if she wanted you just as badly as you wanted her. Your hands felt limp, futile to every attempt of moving them to not seem awkward. It felt as if Tara had been reading your mind because her hands had grabbed yours and guided them under her shirt.
“Wait-” You managed to mutter breathlessly as you pulled away from the kiss, “Are you sure about this?”
“Still as caring as ever. Gosh, yes, L/N, I’m sure.” Tara replied with a breathless laugh, slightly shaking her head. “Must you always be so good?”
A soft smile on your lips as you felt her own on yours once again before you could’ve replied to her words. You returned the now hungrier kiss.
“There’s nothing wrong with being good.” You had mumbled against her lips as you continued to kiss her.
She hadn’t replied this time, her hands simply guiding yours further up her shirt and to the curve of her clothed breast. Your fingers had toyed with the hem of her bra, a small whine came from her in response. Her hands moving away from yours and up your own shirt, feeling out the planes of your skin. Her fingers felt persistent, whereas your own took their time and were more gentle. Unaware of the girl’s growing impatience, your hand moved to the back of her bra, carefully unclasping it.
It had now hung loosely to her skin under her shirt, you took this as your chance to gently allow your thumbs to focus on the buds of her nipples. Immediately receiving a reaction from the girl, a soft whimper against your lips that felt all too sweet. Your mind had temporarily fled to the thought that someone else had too been in this position. You felt your gut slightly twist before pushing away the thought and allowing yourself to at least enjoy this while you can. While she had graced you with the opportunity to do so.
Your nimble fingers were quick against her buds, her breathing becoming ragged. Her mouth felt hot and wet, a reflection of your own as the kiss came to an end. Her eyes were fluttered shut as she allowed soft sighs to escape her, enjoying your touch. You’d seen and felt her back arch slightly with twitches into your touch. Her own hands had paused under your shirt, seemingly had lost its focus and purpose she’d once had with the touch. Quickly, one of your hands had left from under her shirt, moving to your lips where your tongue darted out to wet them before returning it to her nipple.
Tara’s head slightly tipped back at the newfound sensation you’d given her, your other hand moving down her abdomen to the hem of her sweatpants. You knew better than to tease the girl but you couldn’t help yourself, your fingers gently pressing against her clit over the fabric. The soft gasp that left Tara’s lips and the expression on her face made you want to examine every expression and sound she’d offer you with every touch you gave her.
“Don’t tease. Please.” She had breathed out ever-so-softly. Who were you to go against what she wanted? You wanted nothing but to please the girl of your dreams.
You were quick as you had carelessly pushed aside her notebook and text book that was on her desk. Swiftly lifting the shorter girl onto the desk, she lifted her hips slightly, giving you access to pull her sweats down. Your eyes were trained on her as you disregarded her sweatpants onto her bed. One of your hands pushed apart her legs as the other pulled aside her panties, not caring to remove them. You could hear every sweet sigh and soft whimper that escaped her mouth at your every touch, and it drove you completely insane.
A finger swiped through her folds, feeling the wet mess that she had become. You felt a surge of pride and a want– no, a need to give Tara everything she wanted. You allowed two fingers to delve past her folds and into pussy, a soft groan leaving your own lips at the tightness. A guttural moan leaving her, you watched as her head tipped back against the wall. Your fingers were quick, pumping to her every moan and obvious need with the way her hips had begun to buck against your hand. Your thumb pressing circles into her clit as your fingers continue to pump, your other hand raising her shirt to focus on her breasts as well.
With another lick of your fingers, you toyed and played with the bud of her nipple. You wanted to give her all the pleasure you knew she was deserving of. Your lips finding hers as you pulled her into a kiss, muffling her kisses that she now let out into your mouth. With the quickened pace of your fingers from each hand, you took note that it was getting harder for the girl to keep up with the kiss. You pulled away and immediately began working on peppering kisses against her neck, trying and finding her sweet spot. Your teeth grazed her neck as your mouth began to suck on the sensitive part of her neck.
You felt her back arching into you and her body buzzing and writhing with pleasure from your touch. Taking note of how Tara was getting closer by the way her moans and breath fell relentlessly from her lips.
“Close-” She managed to say, pairing with a broken moan which only pushed you to quicken your pace.
“Shit, shit, shit- I’m cumming!” Tara’s voice cried out as she shut her eyes tightly, her body uncontrollably shaking under your touch.
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A few minutes later and the two of you were sitting together at her dining room table eating pizza which you had ordered Tara.
“A true gentlewoman.” She said with a hum before
taking a bite of her pizza.
“Aftercare is important.” You replied with a small shrug as you took a bite of your own pizza.
“So, you're saying that you’ll stay longer?”
“Do you want me to?”
“Is that even a question?”
“Maybe you're right. I'll stay then.”
After the two of you had finished eating, you made your way back over to her room. Now, your arms wrapped around the shorter girl who buried her face into your chest. All felt calm, a stark contrast of what had happened about an hour or two earlier. You felt yourself wanting to stay in this moment, in the safety of the bubble you two created in her room. Tara was slowly falling asleep, you took it upon yourself to further soothe the girl by rubbing her back gently and pressing gentle kisses to her forehead.
“Thank you for this.” She mumbled softly against your chest, slightly muffled.
“You don’t have to thank me, Tar.”
“Tar. I always liked when you called me that.”
“I'll forever call you that if you want me to.”
“I’d like that.”
You itched to ask the girl what all of this meant. What your relationship was like now. Is it friends? More than that, friends with benefits? Maybe…it could be something more than that as well, lovers? You pushed down the thoughts and the itch to ask, wanting to not ruin this perfect bubble the two of you have created.
“Tell me something. Anything.” Tara murmured softly
“You're soft.” It was the first thing that came to mind and the first thing that fled your mouth. A small light laugh had escaped Tara’s lips.
“What’s funny?” You asked curiously.
“It’s just that… I'm not sure I've ever been called or described that way.”
“Glad to be the first, and it’s true.”
“You're sweet.” Her words made a soft smile creep onto your face.
“Look who’s talking.”
“Oh, you're just a flatterer.”
“Can we not flatter each other?”
“I suppose so.”
“Sleep, you're tired.” Your eyes scanned the girl’s face, she was obviously a bit drained. A hand came up to gently caress her face as the other one continued to rub her back. Which had lulled her further into a sleepy state, she only nodded at your words. For the entire time that you stayed at her apartment, you held her and whispered sweet nothings that you knew she couldn’t hear in her sleep, but whispered them anyway.
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A/N: I'M NERVOUS BUT I HOPE YOU GUYS ENJOYED. Again, thank you for all the support and also look around for Make it Right chapter three coming out as well. Bear with me and this, this is my first smut published. However, I had to get it out of the way for upcoming chapters. Thank you all so much for everything, bye lovelies!
#jenna ortega#eroscomet#jenna ortega x fem#tara carpenter x female reader#jenna marie ortega#tara carpenter#jenna ortega imagine#jenna ortega x reader#scream 2022#scream franchise#scream movies#scream#Picking Up Pieces That Aren't Yours
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Steer Clear Pt. III
summary: yn figuring out dynamics with her grumpy flat mate. word count: 7k warnings: abo!, moody h
author’s note:
There is 8 more parts to this up on patreon
I upload a piece of writing every 1-3 days (usually two) consistently// currently updating doctor!h blind date
All writings are accurately and always added to the organized folders in the collections feature
There are currently 300 + pieces available to read
It only cost $3USD —— thanks for any support and check me out here! PART ONE PART TWO +++++
YN‘s day goes by in a blink of an eye.
She and Beatrice slept most of the morning and afternoon without interruption.
YN was of course wrapped as tightly as possible in the blanket that Harry had warned her about.
He was completely right too.
It was absolutely sodden with his scent, YN wishes she had an unlimited supply of it.
It makes her wonder if it’s a reaction purely based off of her current state or she actually would like this scent just as much when she wasn’t in heat.
YN finds herself wishing that Harry was back in their apartment.
It’s a fierce protectiveness, possessiveness that is flaring up in a way that is very unlike her.
Typically, she did the exact opposite.
She pushed people out, sure, all of those said people have been betas but still.
YN had never wanted Niall to stay or anybody else she was close to either.
She would turn venomous, mean, into someone that didn’t match her true personality.
It was pure fight or flight mode that she was willing to act whatever way was necessary to get everybody out of her protected space.
Around three is when YN starts paying closer attention to the clock.
It’s stupid though because Harry very rarely walks in the door earlier than eleven in the evening.
He’s your alpha. He’ll know to come home, YN omega assures her.
“He’s not my fucking alpha,” YN hisses to herself because she doesn’t need to know when he’s getting home because they’re not in any type of relationship.
Exactly the opposite, YN is still convinced more than not that Harry is only tolerating at best until he can find somewhere else that’s not with a broken omega.
With all that being said, YN still watches the clock and in no time, eleven has long passed.
She’s tired but there’s irritation building as she watches it get closer to midnight and her alpha- Harry still hasn’t come home yet.
YN has rubbed her face into the blanket so much that it was ridiculously enough already starting to lose the scent that he had interwoven into every fiber of the knit material.
It’s hard for YN to always decipher her emotions in these cycles before every time seems real, logical, and more than that more intense.
So YN sits and sits and sits on that couch until she finally hears the doorknob turn with a key before it turns open softly.
Harry is assuming she’s asleep, logically, and obviously trying to be quiet as he leans down to untie his shoes before placing them neatly in the spot.
He hangs his gym bag on one of the hooks and shucks off his jacket before tucking it over the bag.
YN doesn’t even realize that she’s growling at him until it exits her mouth and he turns his head to look at her, clearly confused but not startled necessarily.
Harry doesn’t react, he turns back to lock the door before finally making his way to the living area with the same, infuriating emotionless set on his features.
YN raises her pitch, more pushy, not requesting but demanding a response from him.
“I know you’re not growling at me,” Harry rumbles bored, not giving her the attention or response that she was craving, that her omega desired.
YN does not relent, she doesn’t even recognize herself as she watches Harry watch her - his eyes falling on the blanket she was currently wrapped up in.
YN tugs it closer to her body, protective and unwilling to give it up because she felt safe in it.
“I’m not going to take your blanket,” Harry replies to her growls, steady and still almost sounding unbothered, and he doesn’t even care that she loves his scent so much.
YN glares at him, watches him as he makes his way into the kitchen, and her omega hates that it feels rejected by the way he doesn’t come to comfort her.
Harry pulls out a container of one of his meals he’s already prepped for the week, basic chicken and rice that he pops in the microwave before mixing up another protein drink.
Once he’s finished shaking the drink, he takes a long chug from the bottle before he’s finally looking at her again.
Even though his face and body language was appearing unaffected, the thing that gave him away was the way he was pumping out his scent - obnoxious and stronger than necessary.
YN wasn’t really sure what that was about but she was focused on much bigger things at this point.
“Are you going to explain to me what I’ve done that has you so up in arms?” Harry raises an eyebrow, taking another slow sip and licking his bottom lip, “I haven’t had anyone over. I told you I won’t do that again. I will remind you that I’m not a mind reader.”
He was so alpha, so nonchalant, so just….alpha it was frustrating and unfair.
YN’s throat goes dry because she’s not getting the comfort, the reassurance she needs, and in the past, when betas have tried to reassure her old boyfriends and flings, that was when she would turn nasty on them.
She has no urge to get nasty with the alpha standing in front of her.
Instead, embarrassingly enough, she wants to cry because she just wants to bury her face in his neck where the scent is the strongest and she doesn’t know in such a short amount of time that her viewpoint on him has changed so drastically.
“Are you going to answer me or shall I go to my room?” Harry prompts after a long pause of her just staring at him, trying to swallow down the range of emotions that was swirling through her at this time.
YN growls again, louder and more agitated.
“Enough,” Harry finally breaks but just barely, his teeth flashing at her in warning, “I’m sick of the growling. You’re like a feral pup. Tell me what's going on, this is the last time I’m asking you before I go into my room. It’s nearly two in the morning, you shouldn’t even be awake.”
YN’s growls cut off almost instantly even though it wasn’t a command in his alpha timbre, she mumbles, “You came home late.”
Harry grabs his food from the microwave, “Speak up, you were loud enough a minute ago.”
“You came home late,” YN grits out, she knows how utterly ridiculous she sounds, she knows okay?
She wishes she could swallow the words back up.
Harry’s eyebrow only gives the slightest raise before his face is blank again, “I’m always home late. You should have told me if I have been disturbing your sleep by getting in at this time.”
YN stands up, flustered and her face felt hot with a mixture of rage and embarrassment, “That’s not why.”
Harry sighs as he drops his fork to the counter, “What’s the issue then? Do you not want me here? Are you trying to kick me out?”
A distressed whine leaves her throat, that’s not her intention of this conversation at all, and the thought of him leaving makes her want to be sick.
Harry shows he is at least somewhat in-tuned with his alpha when he perks up at the noise, “Okay, that’s not it then.”
YN blinks at him.
“Go to bed,” Harry tells her evenly, no hint at whether any of this has even slightly affected him, “There’s no need to wait up for me. I’ll always be home.”
He doesn’t really get it.
YN wants to cry which means it’s the opportune time to go to bed, moving towards her bedroom without another word to him.
After she uses the restroom and almost gets in her nest, she realizes she hadn’t brought the striped blanket with her which makes her even more unsettled.
If that’s even possible at this point.
Just as she swings open her door, Harry is walking away from her and towards the living area.
He doesn’t look back.
However, the blanket is folded neatly in front of her door, and when she picks it up - she’s fucking delighted to realize that he laid more of his scent on it.
Maybe his inner alpha did exist after all.
YN purrs relentlessly with the blanket perfectly nestled into her bedding like everything else, it was an absolute perfect addition.
If she wasn’t so tired from her long night up, waiting for him, maybe she would have considered the implications of Harry rescenting a blanket for her and leaving it at her door.
Instead, she brushes it off as a nearly fed-up alpha who just wants the needy omega he’s cohabits with to just chill the fuck out and leave him alone.
The latter seems much more likely the scenario for YN.
+
Harry doesn’t not bring up the incident again.
He doesn’t sit her down and set firm boundaries with her that she’s not allowed to control when he comes and goes from the house.
He doesn’t scold her and tell her that he’s an alpha who will not tolerate an omega, who isn’t even his mate, growling at him for no logical reason.
Instead, Harry does the exact opposite of those things.
Their communication is still minimal at best but Harry comes home before ten every single night now without fail.
From the night on after YN’s behavior towards him, he walks through the doors before the clock strikes ten, and continues on with his nightly routine.
He doesn’t acknowledge the change or why he’s doing it.
But YN doesn’t find herself needing to growl at him every time he walks in the door.
She also thinks she must be getting closer to her heat or maybe even insane because she swears that her little items she steals from Harry, like shirts and hoarding the blanket in there as well, are never losing an ounce of his scent either.
Every time she crawls into her nest, it’s the same overwhelming rich and dizzying aroma that is distinctly him and only him.
Harry doesn’t make any type of effort to sit or socialize with YN if she’s in the living room.
What she does notice is that he pops out of his room every so often and YN feels like he’s checking in on her because sometimes he opens the fridge, stares for a moment, and closes it without grabbing anything.
But YN can feel his gaze on the back of her and it makes goosebumps break out on her arms for a reason she can’t really explain.
There’s tension, YN feels like she can almost see it, thick and cloying but she’s not going to be the one to break it either.
On this particular night, YN was more irritable than she’d been in at least a week and it was mostly because her inner omega was unsettled by the lack of attention from Harry.
YN hasn’t felt the need to growl at him recently but her mind keeps replaying the time she hugged him and he squeezed her neck.
How could it go from so intimate to nothing in a matter of seconds.
Does YN choose to stir the pot?
Absolutely.
The next night, right around nine-thirty, YN decides it would be a wonderful time to make a batch of chocolate chip cookies from scratch.
Harry claims the kitchen when he’s home for his dinner.
If YN so much as tries to enter for a bottle of water, it’s not that he would stop her but she’s accustomed to the low grunt that he’ll let slide from the back of his throat at his displeasure of sharing his space.
Fucking alpha.
YN’s used to omegas and betas who are not only okay with sharing space but encourage it.
YN wasn’t trying to be overly messy but she naturally was clumsy, there was flour dusted across the countertop (maybe even a little bit on Beatrice), the drippy yolk of an egg on the side of the bowl when she cracked one funky.
YN’s hands were caked with a mixture of egg, sugar, flour as she tried to roll each ball of cookie dough into similar shapes and size - the made it look so much easier on Bake-Off than now.
When Harry walks in the door at nine-fifty three, doing his typical, neatly lining up his shoes, hanging up his gym bag, and then placing YN’s shoes neatly as well because she just kicks hers off.
Very opposite for their secondary genders.
It would be expected that YN would be the one organizing while Harry was haphazard and careless because he knew an omega would clean up after him - he didn’t seem to share the same beliefs as other alphas.
Harry takes a few steps into the kitchen until he’s on the opposite side of the bar that looks into the open space of the kitchen, an irritated tick in his jaw as he observes the mess that is the kitchen.
”S’quite enough of this, yeah?” Harry rumbles, he looks rougher than usual, not putting on such a good mask as his normal is.
His eyebrows are knitted deeply enough that his lids cover his eyes more than normal, his nostrils were flaring, and his upper lip was crooked upwards in a makeshift almost-snarl as he let out an exasperated huff.
YN turns on the clueless act, a perfectly crafted expression of faux surprise covering her face, “You don’t like cookies?”
”Out of the kitchen,” Harry replies sharply, his hackles would be up in any other situation and they were close, shoulders so tense that they were nearly to his ears as he stared daggers into her.
It was intense enough that she got a zip of electricity up her spine that she couldn’t tell whether it was arousal or fear.
Maybe both.
Definitely both.
Her inner omega wasn’t all together clueless and knew that she shouldn’t be taunting an already on-edge alpha because she wanted attention that she didn’t even deserve or should expect from him.
”Once I’m done with the cookies,” YN waves her hand, airily and trying to appear unbothered like he normally is - she gives him credit because it’s a lot harder than it looks if she’s being honest with herself.
”You’re not finishing the cookies,” Harry shakes his head, turning the corner into the kitchen, and making YN’s heart rate spike instantaneously, “You’re going to sleep. You need rest and this isn’t the time to make fuckin’ cookies.”
”It’s the perfect time to make them,” YN turns it back easily, trying not to let the quiver in his tone as obvious, she can hear it easily and hopes that he doesn’t.
”Do you think I’m stupid?” Harry asks bluntly, his tone louder than normal as he reaches over the stovetop to press a button on the panel to turn the oven off from where it was preheated and ready for the cookies, “You’ve never made cookies once since I’ve been here. You are off work and have all day but you choose right now. The only time I use the kitchen.”
Shit.
She wasn’t as smooth as she thought.
YN swallows harshly, the quip about turning off the oven dying in her throat.
He doesn’t acknowledge the implications of what he just accused her of.
He ignores it like he does with everything else.
”Go to bed,” Harry repeats, his Adam’s apple bobbing as he watches her, he catches onto her game easily even if he doesn’t completely know the reason that she’s playing it.
“I have to clean up,” YN argues now, she wasn’t going to leave him to clean up the mess.
That was never her intention plus with how exhausted, irritated he appears, YN was already feeling guilty for picking such a bad day to mess with him.
”I’ll clean it up,” Harry retorts firmly, the timbre coming into his tone but it wasn’t enough to be commanding, just tilting on the edge of it, “Leave it alone and go to sleep.”
YN hesitates by the doorway of the kitchen, loitering as she watches Harry roughly grab a towel from where it was hanging on the oven door, reaching under the sink for the cleaning spray, and getting to work.
This did the opposite of YN’s intentions, it made her feel even more unsettled.
She somehow managed to not even really get Harry’s attention this way, he just dismissed her again.
YN doesn’t argue further, doesn’t want to push him to use his alpha command but she does retreat down the hall with her metaphorical tail between her legs and goes into her room like Harry had asked multiple times.
She can’t sleep, her nest doesn’t feel right and she can’t make it feel right.
YN is trying desperately not to cry when she rearranges a sweater for the fifth time to no avail.
As much as she doesn’t want to leave the bedroom, she needs a break from her nest because it is driving her insane, and it’s been long enough that Harry should be out of the kitchen for her to grab something to drink.
This was hell.
YN opens her door, takes one step forward, and her foot hits something soft.
When she glances down, it’s one of the blankets from the living room, neatly folded and right where the one was before.
YN picks it up, pressing it to her face, and realizing that it was another scented blanket.
A gift from the alpha almost.
But YN wonders if it’s just stressing him out to have such an dysfunctional omega in the same proximity of her.
It wasn’t romantic, it wasn’t a courting gesture, it was a simple gesture her for his own benefit.
Or that what’s her inner omega was convincing her even as she arranged it nicely and fell asleep promptly afterwards like she never even struggled to sleep in the first place.
++
When YN wakes up in the morning, reflecting on the night before, she realizes that she really cannot continue to put Harry through this mayhem of her pre-heat.
It’s not fair to him, he’s just an alpha who she happened to agree to let move in with her who didn’t really now what he was signing u poor, and she really wasn’t making his life easy with all of it.
If YN had thought about it for longer, she would have realized it was an absolutely horrible idea.
However, she was much more focused on not embarassing herself in front of the most attractive alpha she’d ever come across anymore than she already had.
She couldn’t believe she even attempted the cookie thing, getting so easily called out, and getting nothing of a reaction.
YN doesn’t think it’s possible to embarass herself further than she already had in that scenario.
It was time to change something.
For the first time, YN was going to try to seek out an alpha.
It was a knee-jerk, too much of an emotional reaction when she sends a text to Niall.
YN: Blaze tonight? We haven’t been clubbing in a hot minute! Thinkin’ it’s about time to find me an alpha ;-)
Niall: Fuck yeah, pick u up at nine?
YN: I’ll be waiting.
And again, if Niall knew she was in pre-heat, he would never agree.
However, what Niall doesn’t know will not hurt him.
Right?
+++++++_ When YN walks out of her bedroom after shooting off that text to Niall, satisfied to have plan to get her mind off of an alpha that is not only out of her league but minimally tolerates her.
The house smells amazing but it’s not just because of Harry’s scent (that’s a big part of it) but YN feels like now she must be hallucinating because the apartment smells like chocolate chip cookies.
Sure enough when she makes her way into the kitchen, there’s a clear storage container holding what looked to be a dozen chocolate chip cookies.
And when YN peels back the lid, taking one out to examine, she realizes that Harry had made the cookies.
The frustration that shot through YN was for multiple different reasons.
Did he think that it was funny to tell her she couldn’t and then he did?
He looked so incredibly exhausted last night and he was still vindictive enough to stay up and make cookies?
She had watched him with her own eyes lean over to turn the oven off which meant he would have had to preheat it again.
YN glances over at the sink to see that there are no dishes either which means after all this, he really did clean the whole kitchen.
It was most likely to prove a point.
It felt like the point was that she wasn’t a good omega.
When she wasn’t in these vicious cycles, she was tidy and more on-top of things but in it, there was almost this brain fog that blanketed her.
The chocolate chip cookies just solidified that she needs to go out tonight, she needs to get her mind off of Harry, and find another alpha.
Her omega despises the thought but she pushes that prodding inner monologue as far back in her mind as possible as she’s getting ready in her room.
YN goes for a simple but sexy dress, a makeup without wearing makeup look, making a subtle look with dewy skin and a highlight on her nose, hair loose and purposefully messy in waves.
She looked good, felt good as she gave herself a once over in the mirror, and before she knew it, Niall was texting her that he was out front.
YN doesn’t leave a note, why would she?
She doesn’t owe that alpha anything, just like he doesn’t owe her.
They’re not even friends for crying out loud.
YN gives Beatrice half a dozen kisses before locking the door on her way out of the apartment, fixing her hair in the reflection of the elevator doors as she waits for them to open.
Niall unlocks the door for YN to slip into the passenger seat, “Whoa, you tryin’ to pull tonight with that outfit, huh? You’d get any betas in the room.”
“Alpha,” YN corrects as she places her small purse in her lap.
Niall’s eyebrows raise towards his hairline, “Since when are you interested in alphas? You’d literally never wanted to even interact with one.”
YN shrugs, not quite willing to share the honest answer, “Something new, I guess.”
Niall doesn’t buy it, as he pulls away from the curb, “Does this have anything to do with the fact that you live with an alpha now?”
YN lets out a faux-surprised laugh, lying through her teeth when she says, “If anything, it makes me never want to meet another alpha again. I don’t know what you were thinking when you thought that’d be a good idea.”
The smile falters on Niall’s face, his big blue eyes turning into a pool of concern, “Is it bad? Will he not leave? You could have told me-”
YN’s heart rate spikes, she doesn’t want him to think that or report that back to Harry.
“No! Jesus, Niall. I was joking. Harry’s a great flatmate, a little quiet but as non-problematic as they come,” YN lets another lie slip out, this one a bit easier because she wasn’t intending to paint a negative picture of Harry to her friend.
“Oh, okay. Good,” Niall nods as his shoulders relax, “It’s not like I could even match him anyways. There’s a reason they call him The Annihilator.”
“Who calls him that?” YN asks, having never heard the name before.
“It’s his fighting name. I told you he fights for money, that’s where he is most nights. That's what they call him because he rarely loses,” Niall shrugs as he stops at a light, looking over at her, “You’ve had to have seen his muscles. He’s ripped even for an alpha. Dude is the definition of an alpha.”
YN could definitely agree with that.
YN also doesn’t like the idea that he fights for money or knowing that’s what Harry does when he’s not at their apartment.
He hides it well when he walks in the door, YN sometimes notices a bruise or a mark but she knew he boxed.
She didn’t realize that it was actual fighting where he could be injured or seriously injure someone else.
“He didn’t tell you that? Huh. I guess it’s not surprising, I only found out by accident,” Niall shrugs easily, honking when the car in front of them doesn’t move, “He rarely shares anything about himself.”
“How do you accidentally find that out?” YN asks curiously, Harry wasn’t going to hand over this information nor would she ask him so Niall was the best second option to get the information out of him.
“I was walking home from the pub one night, a Saturday, I think,” Niall recalls, pausing as he remembers, “There was a huge crowd of people, a line waiting outside of a gym, and I thought that it was odd because it was like two in the morning.”
“I was a little buzzed, wasn’t necessarily in my right mind, and I followed the crowd into the gym to see what all the excitement was about,” Niall continues, “I realized a bit too late that it was an illegal fighting ring. I went to leave but as soon as they announced the main fight of the night, Harry was the person who walked out that had people going insane.”
“I stayed, he didn’t notice me in the crowd. I really didn’t know anything about him. He was a guy I worked with who I occasionally talked about the weather and sports with,” Niall laughs, “He really fucked the dude he was fighting up. I mean like…within the minute, the dude was knocked out cold.”
“It was odd, very Harry-like but he didn’t even look excited that he just won. When the ref raised his hand in the air, everyone was screaming, and Harry just looked bored. It was crazy, I think I would feel on top of the world.”
“I didn’t think he noticed me in the crowd. He really wasn’t in the ring for that long nor did I think he even glanced into the crowd once.”
Niall bites his lip for a moment, “The next Monday, he kinda confronted me in the break room. He told me to keep my mouth shut about it. I told him I thought the fight was awesome and we sorta became chill after that.”
YN can’t help but scoff because that’s such a Niall way to become friends with someone who was threatening him like that.
YN had so many questions rolling around, none get out before they pull into their parking spot, and Niall is getting out to usher her towards the club.
It was packed.
YN was used to going to omega and beta clubs only, no alphas allowed but this was for every secondary gender, none were excluded.
The smells were overly intense to YN’s sensitive nose, making it crinkle and wish that she had something of Harry’s to bury her nose in.
As they make their way through the crowds, YN can’t help but wish for Harry, wish to be back at their home, back in her nest surrounded by her soft, amazing smelling things.
The desire for another alpha had left her body the moment she had entered the club and saw the way the alphas were leering at her.
There was a reason she never came to these types of clubs.
Niall would be horrified and quick frankly hurt if he found out that YN was in her pre-heat, it wasn’t until now she was realizing how much she may be endangering herself.
She wanted Harry.
Even if he was mean.
Grumpy.
Only tolerating her.
He was safe.
He made her feel safe and protected.
YN was fighting down the urge to ask to go home.
She knows that Niall would take her but when she sees how happy he is, how in his element he is when a few omegas circle him, it would make her feel guilty to take him out of his already fun time.
The night goes pretty uneventful until the end, YN sat on her barstool, sipping on the same drink for the last hour.
Niall was socializing, dancing, and coming back in regularly to check on YN but he was oblivious as always to how subdued she was.
A few different people had come over to strike up conversations but they fizzled out after she realized the majority were just looking for a hookup and all she could think about was the alpha who was most likely already home by now.
YN goes to check her phone, trying to see what time it is but it’s dead.
She must have forgot to plug it in while she was getting ready but if she was to guess, it was getting into the early hours by this point.
YN hasn’t seen Niall in a few minutes and she feels like now is an appropriate time to ask for them to leave so she slides off the barstool that she had been taking residence on to find her friend in the crowd of sweaty bodies.
As she makes her way through the swarms of dancing people, someone grabs her wrist and it causes her to stumble backwards.
She assumes it’s Niall, she must have walked right past him.
But when she looks at the person who tugged her, it was an alpha.
A big, beefy alpha with a sharp, unsettling smile as he eyed her up.
He didn’t let go of her wrist and even with the mass amount of people surrounding them, she could smell how harshly he was pushing out his own scent which smelled like something akin to a musky, dampness that made her want to gag.
”Let go,” YN demands as she attempts to tug her wrist away.
”I just want to talk to you,” The alpha responds, in a fake display of playfulness as he yanks her again, bringing him even closer to his own chest.
”I said let go,” YN repeats, firmer as she tries to escape his grip, the pressure on her bone was painful and surely going to leave a bruise.
”I’m not done talking to you,” The man replies with a hint of offense, like it was absurd that YN was trying to pull out of his grip, “You shouldn’t come to these types of clubs if you’re not looking for an alpha to take you home and knot -“
YN brings her wrist up which mean his hand as well, she is in pure defense mode when she sinks her teeth into the meat of his hand which makes him jerk away with a very unalphalike yelp.
He glances down at his bloody hand with disbelief, “Did you just fucking bite me?”
YN wipes her face, she knows she has his blood on her lips from how fiercely she had sunk her teeth in, with the purpose of pain and injury.
”Whoa, whoa…” Niall’s voice comes out of no where, putting himself between the two of them, “What the fuck is going on?”
YN wants Harry.
YN wants to fucking leave.
YN wants her nest.
”Take me home,” YN says to Niall instead.
”YN, what- “ Niall tries to ask again, concern and utter confusion written over his facial features as he watches the alpha tend to his injured hand by ripping a piece of his shirt to wrap in a makeshift bandage.
”Please take me home,” YN is pleading at this point which leaves Niall’s lips in a firm line as he nods and guides her out of the club.
++
It isn’t fair by YN doesn’t talk on the way home.
She doesn’t give Niall any explanation for the events that had unfolded when he deserves it.
YN promises she’ll make it better in the morning but her omega is so incredibly unsettled and she can’t believe that she was fucking stupid enough to think that going out to a club with alphas would have made her feel differently towards Harry.
She just wants to crawl into a ball in her nest and disappear until her cycle is over.
It was getting worse, further, closer.
She had fucking bit someone like a feral fucking pup as Harry had previously called her.
Niall walks her up to her door, waits patiently as she rustles in her purse for the keys to the apartment door.
However, it isn’t necessary because before she can even find her keys, the door is swinging open, and revealing an absolute incensed, furious alpha who’s nostrils were flaring, teeth were flashing, and he looked less than a second away from ripping out Niall’s jugular vein. +_+
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"don't do this to me, love" (jake x reader)
genre: angst, fluff word count: 0.9k requested by nonnie ♡
a/n: guys i've ran out of my purple dividers 😩 and i know I KNOW i was supposed to update the smau last night STOP LOOKING AT ME LIKE THAT
masterlist
When your alarm vibrates quietly underneath your pillow, Jake still pretends to be sleeping as you sit up on the bed with a sigh. And he just knows that you also had an almost sleepless night as the fight the two of you have had the evening before still lingers heavily in the crisp morning air.
He hears you leave the bedroom, quietly closing the door behind you, doing your best not to wake up your sleeping boyfriend which only makes the guilt sitting on Jake's heart feel even heavier as he looks back on the harsh words he said to you yesterday. He clenches his eyes tightly, rubbing his face with his hands as he cringes at his own behavior.
Without wasting any more time with letting you go on while being stuck on his irrationality, he gets up as well and makes his way to the kitchen where he knows you'll be.
And he was right, you're standing with a cup of tea, leaned over the counter as your eyes are blankly planted into the wall in front of you. You don't even flinch or startle when you feel Jake's arms wrapping around your middle, putting your tea down as he buries his head in the crook of your neck.
"I'm sorry," he mumbles into your skin, pressing small kisses here and there. "I didn't mean to dismiss you like that yesterday, love."
You hate how the feeling of his warm body pressed to yours instantly makes you feel so at ease, so you move away from his embrace to make a statement. With gaze planted to the floor beneath your feet, you avoid his hurt gaze like fire. No matter how much you wanted to cave in, you just couldn't forget about his cold words spat at you some hours before, splitting your heart into pieces in the process.
"I was just tired and I know it's not an ex-"
"I just need some time, Jake," you cut him off, grabbing the ear of your mug again and nervously clenching your fingers around it. "I know you didn't mean it and I'm not mad. I'm just... hurt."
Pressing his lips together, Jake nods his head with a sigh and after pressing a kiss to the top of your head, he leaves the kitchen, not wanting to suffocate you any further. Your words only made him feel worse though, so the moment that he steps in the bathroom, he slouches on the shower wall heavily, letting the hot water hit his back and try to pry his mind away from your exhausted eyes.
And he gives you all the time you needed, trying his best not to bother you even when evening started approaching.
You walk into the bedroom and Jake watches you from the bed in silence up until your fingers clench onto your pillow and you lift it up from the bed into your arms. Before you even get the chance to grab one of the neatly folded blankets laying on the corner of your shared bed, Jake's hand wraps around your wrist gently and stops your movements.
"What are you doing?" He asks, eyes slightly widened as he looks down at you.
You clear your throat and pull your hand out of his weak hold on you. "I'm sleeping on the couch."
A flash of hurt runs through your boyfriend's face as he lifts himself up from the mattress, looking almost like a kicked puppy.
"C'mon, don't do this to me, love," the whine mingles at the back of his throat as he takes the pillow out of your arms and places it back on the bed, right next to his. "Look, I'm sorry. I know I've been an asshole but stop avoiding me, please. Let's talk about it?"
With a resigned sigh nod of your head, you sit on the edge of the bed, turning around just to face him. A frown appears on his forehead as he notices your eye bags, feeling responsible for making you so restless.
Jake reaches his hand out to take yours again, sighing in relief when you let him intertwine your fingers together. "I know I didn't have the right to snap at you like that and I'm really sorry for that. I know you were only worried for me and I acted like an idiot but I was just tired and I took it out on you. You know I never want to hurt you, baby."
You let him pull you by your hand closer to him, only to wrap his arm over your waist and drag you right on top of him. You lay on his chest in silence for a moment, enjoying the so missed feeling of his fingers running through your hair, gently untangling any knot that he's come across of.
"Just let me take care of you sometimes, alright? That's all I ask for," you mutter quietly, hand slipping underneath his shirt and caressing his skin gently as you rest your cheek on his chest. "You keep overworking yourself all the time, so it's normal that I worry about you. I only want the best for you, you know that, right?"
Jake hums, enclosing his arms around you tightly. "I know," he whispers back, leaning down for his lips to lay on your forehead. "And I'm really thankful for that. For you. I'm the luckiest to have you with me. Don't ever let my bullshit words tell you otherwise, okay?"
You nod your head, reaching your free hand up to caress his jawline tenderly. Jake catches your hand in his, pulling it a little higher to press a kiss to your knuckles.
"Let's go to sleep now. I hate to think that I kept you awake for the whole night yesterday. I'll take care of you tomorrow, hm? Will you let me do that for you, baby?"
permanent taglist: @bambisgirl @arizejkt19 @luvmura @milisabunny @cathy-1997 @satoruskitchenrag @ramenoil @jenjnk @jaylaxies @yoongspi @nichoswag
#carly's 1k event ૮ ˶ᵔ ᵕ ᵔ˶ ა#1k event: requests ✎#enhypen x reader#enhypen imagines#enhypen#enhypen fluff#jake imagines#jake sim x reader#jake sim#jake x reader#jake drabble#jake sim angst#jake angst
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Jealous
David x fem!reader
(I am obsessed with this man)
UPDATE-finally got round to editing it and making it a little better in my opinion.
You been hired as a part of the makeup team for the 3rd Terrfier having the first 2 be some of your favourite films, you were stoked beyond words.
The makeup and costuming department was a small due to a smaller budget. So you’d gotten the know the others well. It was the first day on set and you’d yet to meet any of the actors, getting the prosthetics ready, and talking through any final makeup changes with Damien.
You’d been given the golden ticket, working on the man himself, thee art the clown. Due to clashing schedules the cast read through was something you’d had to miss out on, so you really were a newbie. Having been in awe of David since Terrfier came out, getting to be so up close to him was a dream come true.
You’d come to set early to get set up and after talking with Damien, you grabbed your kit, laying out the things you needed and the order you’d use stuff in. Being able to be in the quiet was calming, your nerves were heightened, feeling like you were living in a dream. You were talented, but to be working with the likes of Damien and David had your head spinning.
A light knock pulled you out of your head, it was still slightly early but nothing major, still, the knock surprised you none the less.
“Come in” you called out, pushing your half empty kit bag on the the shelf. You hadn’t realised it was David that had knocked since you were stood with your back still facing the door.
“Thought I’d come say hey” his voice was gentle yet charming, you spun on your heels to face him, your cheeks turning up ward into a bright smile. There he was stood right there, within arms reach. You were taken aback at how truly handsome he was, you knew he was attractive from photos and panel videos but nothing like having him stand in-front of you in the flesh.
“Since you know we’re going to be spending hours a day together. Plus we never got to meet at the cast reading. I was kinda gutted you weren’t there. I love your work, especially that joker piece you did” he continued, letting out a small laugh.
“Hey! yeah, im y/n. It’s actually nice to finally meet you. I was so bummed I had to miss it. Im in shock that you know of my work! But thank you that really means alot!” You answered sticking your hand toward him, he returned the gesture. Gently placing his hand in yours and shaking it. You locked eye contact with the tall man, a blush rose to your cheeks, which in turn caused to look away.
You both clicked instantly, after light flirting and a conversation that seemed to flow like water, it was time to get him in the chair. This man was a charmer, you don’t know how you’d survive the duration of filming, you could already feel yourself gaining feelings for him.
~a couple of months into filming
You’d gotten to know David well, and he you. You two had become kind of inseparable. Finding that you both seemed to gravitate toward each other, even on days that David wasn’t filming you’d usually end up doing something together to get your and his mind off of work for a while. The early mornings and late nights you had together became the best part of the working day for both of you, although doing the makeup and taking the said makeup off was tedious, you and David got the trailer to yourselves and that time was filled with belly laughs and constant chatter between the two of you. Your feelings had developed for David, being around him so much just intensified them.
After filming finished, premiers and cons were beginning. Your name had gotten out there, you’d become as popular as the main cast especially due to all the content fans got from your and David’s outings.
~You’d been invited to a panel, along with David. You’d stood at the side of the stage. You’d never done anything like this before, your anxiety was through the roof, your knees shook as you waited shifting your weight from one foot to the other. You felt a firm squeeze on your shoulder you knew instantly who it was, David. He kept his arm over your shoulders whilst he stood beside you. As if he was magic, he could tell how nervous you were about the whole thing. You appreciated him.
“You’re gonna smash it pretty lady” he whispered to you, pulling you into a hug, he rested his chin on top of your head not letting go until he was called up onto the stage.
It was your turn, you tapped the tip of your middle finger against the pad of your thumb a habit you’d picked up to replace picking at the skin around your fingers when you got anxious, the crowd was far larger then you’d expected. You took the seat next to David, and plopped your self on the chair behind the long table.
The interviewer was pretty, no. Drop dead gorgeous. And you could tell she had eyes for David, you swallowed down the pit you had in your stomach. The flirting was obvious, she batted her lashes, pushed her arms to reveal more of her cleavage, all the text book things. You didn’t hate her, why would you? but you envied that she could probably have David right there and then if she wanted too. You were quiet on the stage, you’d usually be able to keep your anxiety in check and David picked up on this instantly, he hated seeing you struggling, he wanted to hug you, comfort you, but he couldn’t so instead he hooked his pinky finger on to yours under the table, if anything it helped calm him too.
If asked a question you’d answer and thank fans when ever they came up. You were extremely grateful and loved every single one of them, they meant you could be sat were you were today. But due to your inner turmoil you tried your best to stay composed remaining polite and appreciative but quiet. Jealousy bubbled, even though he sat there with his pinky intertwined with yours you’d convinced yourself he only viewed you as a friend, he was a charming beautiful soul, you hated being like this you were a grown adult. But with it mixed in with the shame and the embarrassment, for thinking about David romantically. Why would a man such as himself glance your way, when he was surrounded by such interesting, gorgeous women?
A fan had walked up to the mic situated in the audience, you were away with your thoughts and you hadn’t realised the fan had asked a question directed toward just you, having the majority of fans ask questions primarily for David you hadn’t realised this one was for you. You felt David unlink his pinky with yours and gently place his hand on your wrist, David gave your arm a slight stroke with his thumb to get your attention, offering you a reassuring smile whilst tilting his head ever so slightly toward the fan.
“Hey, Sorry! Could you repeat that? I didn’t quite hear” you smiled at the fan, feeling bad for not listening.
“Of course! hi I’m kay! im such a huge fan of you! So obviously me and the fans want to know what was your favourite thing to do in your down time when you weren’t working on the film? We’ve seen all the photos of your guys days out but I really wanna know!” Kay finished, it was an odd question but a sweet one at that with all the photos circulating of you and the cast hanging out, fans get curious.
“Hmm, probably just catching a film with David and sometimes other cast members every so often! Or me and David would find the BEST takeout places if we were filming in the same location for a while so we’d always get takeout then build Lego sets together. Elliot would join in when he wasn’t too busy too! Me and David also have a shared love of theatre so we’d catch shows together! Especially musicals. I think having down time when filming a project like this is highly important! being around guts and gore is so so fun but day in day out can get tiring”
The fan seemed super happy with the answer you gave, but what you did miss out was any time you spent with David was your favourite when working or not, even when the job load was stressful David made it all feel okay again.
You were desperate to get off of the stage, your emotions were starting to drain you and so was your social battery and thankfully the panel was coming to a finish,
“We want to thank the panel today! to the wonderful David and Y/n!” The lady said, the crowd erupted with applause, you thanked the crowd and left the stage. The interviewer nodded her head toward you as you walked off, you returned the gesture. Once off the stage you turned to wait for David releasing she’d swooped in to give David a goodbye hug, the hug lasted a while, and with that you walked away you needed air.
Mentally beating yourself up for ever thinking there was something special between you and him, surprised at yourself for just walking away, as you’d usually wait for David or vice versa. But you needed a breather. Being in love with this man was too much. Soon as the press and cons were over you’d have to go back to your old life anyway, a life that was a million worlds away from David’s . His new found stardom would mean, you’d soon become just another makeup artist he’s worked with. And it hurt.
You’d managed to make your way outside avoiding the large crowds of horror fans by navigating the labyrinth of corridors in the venue,“Hey, y/n wait up!” David called out to you, you hadn’t realised David was behind you, his tall frame taking large fast steps toward you making his way through the door that was propped open.
“Why’d you speed off? I saw you wait for me off stage for a sec then you vanished. I was gonna ask if you wanted to sneak off and go get coffee, luckily I’d seen you through the window” he smiled down at you once he caught up, your face was flush and red. It’s like you couldn’t even look at him, you’d made your self feel like a child with a one way crush.
“Just needed some air, big crowds, it’s all new to me.” You answered him, you both walked in sync with each other. You allowed yourself to take deep breaths, it was all abit overwhelming. From being around people you now considered family every day, to falling in love, to having to do press and premieres. To knowing it was all going to go back to how it was before again.
“Wanna sit?” He gestured toward a bench, and you obliged. You had seemed to manage to find a quiet haven away from the craziness that was just beyond a wall.
“Y/n, what’s really going on? I know you were anxious but on that stage, it’s like you’d lost your sparkle. And I know for a fact you can handle your anxiety like a badass.” he was so in tuned with people, especially yourself.
“I don’t know, I guess I was in my own head. Which I shouldn’t have been. The fans had come from far and wide. And I sat there, like an idiot” you looked toward your feet, kicking at the dry, dead leaves that lay on the floor.
“well, despite what’s going on in that head. You did well, I could tell you were struggling with something but the fact you got up there and did it anyways. I’m proud of you” he once again smiled at you, nudging you lightly with his shoulder.
“Thank you David, I’m so proud of what we’ve all created. But those crowds dude. They’re intense” you said whilst letting out a long breath,
“Y/n, wanna know something funny, the interviewer slipped her number in my pocket whilst we were leaving the stage! That’s an old school trick if I ever did see one.” He laughed, suddenly the jealousy came bubbling back in your stomach again, you gave a pathetic attempt at a laugh back trying to hide the hurt but failing miserably , you were never an actor.
“Bless her, I’m sure some horror film buff will make her happy” David said as he took the piece of paper out of his pocket and crumpled it in his fist. You looked at him,
“Your not going to text her?” You questioned, genuinely confused.
David looked at you, raising an eyebrow, “Why would I want to text another woman when I’ve got the woman I want right next to me.”
Your eyebrows knit together,
“Y/n, have you not caught on yet? You think I let just anyone paint my nails” he stated, as if the question was rhetorical.
you chuckled, genuine this time, “Yes David, because you’re so sweet if someone asked if they could paint your nails you’d let them” smiling at him, he was a man to be cherished.
“Well that’s besides the point, y/n. I am absolutely crazy about you. Silly. Head over heels or what ever you want to call it. I’m in love with you. And I need to tell you now, before you have to go back, other wise I’d never do it.”
You grabbed his arm, hooking yours onto his, relaxing into the bench and crossing your leg over the other in the process. A smile so wide slapped on your face you’d look manic to anyone walking by.
“Good, because im in love with you too. And thank god, because it means I don’t have to be jealous anymore” you smirked at him, as he turned to look at you, a grin plasters on his face too.
“Jealous nelly are we? I could tell you weren’t fond of that interviewer” he said as he leaned in, to finally kiss you.
#david howard thornton#David Howard Thornton imagine#terrifier#terrifer 2#terrfier 3#art the clown#David Howard Thornton x reader
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The Lark Ascending: Chapter Four (Agatha Harkness x Reader)
Summary: The working relationship between a conductor and their soloist was supposed to be seamless. But what happens when you're dealing with the notoriously fickle (and your ex to boot) Agatha Harkness?
Word Count: 4.7k
A/N: Hello! Here's chapter four of my conductor!Agatha sequel. Updates unfortunately depend on my schedule, but I always try to write when I can :) I've updated my tag list for Lark, so if you'd like to be added feel free to let me know! This is my favorite chapter yet, and I've linked the main piece I listened to while writing, Rachmaninov's 14 Romances: Op. 34: No 14 (Vocalise) . As always I hope you enjoy and feel free to let me know your thoughts!
Tag List: @fanficreadinglistandarchieve @chiar4anna @marisacoulterswife @getlostsquidward @rigglemethat @aquvr1us @dazzlinghahn
Previous Chapter
The relationship between a conductor and a soloist was special, as you had learned throughout your various performances. There was a certain level of trust that was required on the soloist’s end; to have no doubt that the conductor would follow their lead and guide the rest of the ensemble along with them.
The conductor needed to hold the same belief, only that the soloist was confident enough in their music to make it through the selected concerto without faltering. One missed entrance or unsteady tempo change could send the entire orchestra falling off the cliff with them.
It was a push and pull dynamic, with the temperament of the conductor and potential ego of the soloist threatening to throw everything off balance. You had never experienced any issues with past conductors you had worked with, but none of them were Agatha.
You had scarcely seen the conductor since your intimate conversation at the gala the week prior. While her words of encouragement had been giving you the boost of confidence you had been lacking, it was hard to focus on any of that when your brain had been so fixated on what happened right after. Or rather, what would have happened if you hadn’t been interrupted.
It didn’t help that you failed to catch Agatha alone in the days after. She was usually with Tony going over (rejecting) his new marketing ideas, or being trailed by a frazzled looking Scott frantically writing down whatever instructions Agatha would bark at him from over her shoulder.
The more you thought about it, you really didn’t understand how that particular arrangement was working out.
You had been trying to work up the nerve to approach Agatha all week, which was why you decided to come in earlier than was needed. There wasn’t a rehearsal you needed to attend and no meetings until the afternoon, so you were hoping to catch the conductor when she came in.
It was strange, feeling this conflicted. To not really know where you stood with her after all this time. You believed her when she said you were friends, and maybe that was all you were supposed to be.
You didn’t want to linger on why that thought made you as upset as it did.
However, it appeared luck was on your side this morning, as Agatha was rounding a corner, engrossed in reading something on her phone. Her dark brown hair fell over her shoulders, and your eyes focused on her white dress shirt that was tucked into her purple dress slacks. You couldn’t help but notice her bare skin, as she had left a few of the buttons undone.
She noticed you after a moment, and her face lit up.
“What are you doing here?” Agatha asked curiously, pocketing her phone and removing her glasses. “I don’t have you scheduled for rehearsal until Friday.”
“I know,” you said suddenly, craning your neck to look over at her. “I was hoping we could talk about the other night.”
“Hm?” Agatha responded as she glanced at you, rolling up the sleeves of her shirt. “Whatever do you mean?”
You averted your gaze at the sight of her toned arms and her lithe fingers securing the sleeves stayed in place. If Agatha noticed the faint blush on her cheeks she didn’t comment on it.
Clearing your throat, you gave her a pointed look. “After the gala?”
The conductor had a blank expression on her face, before she nodded. “Oh, you mean my assistant? It’s so hard to find good help nowadays.”
“No, I don’t mean Scott,” you dismissed her, frowning as you tried to get her attention. “Agatha, come on, are we really not going to talk about what almost happened?”
Agatha feigned innocence, giving your arm a quick gentle squeeze . “You’ve been under so much stress these past few weeks, dear. Consider it all forgotten.”
“What?”
As the conductor went to open her mouth, she shook her head. “If you’ll excuse me, I have an assistant to reprimand.”
Whipping your head around, you found Scott struggling to carry three huge cardboard boxes down the hallway.
“Lang! I know I asked to have those delivered to my hotel. What are they doing here?” Agatha seethed as she stormed off.
As Scott started to explain, he dropped one of the boxes in the process and you watched as it comically fell to the ground. Agatha pinched the bridge of her nose in frustration, not assisting him in picking it up, merely instructing him to take them one by one to her office.
“Believe me, none of us get it either,” Monica said as she came to stand next to you, observing Scott and Agatha.
“How long has Scott been working for her?” You asked, as you couldn’t help but wonder if he had just started.
Agatha wasn’t known for her patience, or for giving second chances. The multiple assistants she had apparently fired before you, and dozens of interns after, serving as proof to the high standards she tended to live by.
“I think he’s been her assistant for over a year now,” Monica explained, looking puzzled as Scott tried pushing all three boxes stacked up on top of each other. “It’s funny, it’s the longest she’s kept someone around since…”
It took you a moment to realize she trailed off, and you forced yourself to look away as Agatha told Scott to stop, insisting that she would take care of it herself.
“Since what?” You prompted, and Monica uncomfortably looked to the ground.
“Well, since you,” Monica said, keeping her voice low enough so none of the other musicians could hear her.
“I’m sure that’s not true. She had to have kept someone around for a while, right?” You asked, thinking back on if your former stand partner ever mentioned any of your replacements, until you came short.
Out of all the things you and Monica would discuss whenever you both had time to catch up you realized she never once brought up Agatha.
Monica grimaced, shooting another quick glance in Agatha’s direction as she was shooing Scott away from trying to help her. “Not really, no. It was pretty bad after you left.”
“Bad how?”
Monica sighed, and it seemed like to you she was torn between telling you or not. She tugged on your arm, leading you away from the concert hall to a deserted corner.
“None of us thought anything of it at first. You know how she can be,” Monica said quietly, and you nodded because you did know how difficult Agatha could be to work with. “A few people thought she was trying to annoy Hayward by firing them so quickly, but then he was arrested.”
“Yeah, you could have mentioned that before,” you said, remembering Agatha dropping that bomb on you last week.
Monica shifted then, an uneasy expression on her face.
“What?” You questioned, not liking the way she was looking at you.
“Nothing,” Monica insisted, but she refused to meet your eyes. “Hayward was gone, and she seemed to get along better with the new guy, but she was still going through a new assistant every few weeks.”
“I’m sure it wasn’t that bad,” you commented, but Monica looked at you then and shook her head. “So what changed?”
“No one knows,” Monica admitted. “She hired Scott on and it’s been that way for around a year, maybe a little longer. To be fair she’s been gone a lot of the time, but still.”
Right, you thought to yourself, Agatha had been traveling a lot. Not that you knew where she was going.
Unfortunately that was the moment the conductor in question came traipsing back around the corner, more agitated than before, and you could just barely hear her telling Scott to go feed Scratchy after rehearsal.
“Orchestra,” Agatha called out, roughly running her fingers through her hair as she strolled past you. “As much as I’d love to sit around a campfire with all of you and join hands as we go around sharing stories on our past traumas and various metaphorical battle scars, I believe it would benefit all of us to be on stage for rehearsal, yes?”
“I’ll see you later,” Monica said reassuringly, before taking off in the same direction as the rest of the orchestra.
Later that afternoon, you were getting ready to go home for the day. You had a rather productive meeting with Pepper over any changes you wanted for promotional materials going into opening night.
Unfortunately, you spent most of the time stewing over Agatha’s typical elusiveness. You were used to it by now, but you couldn’t help but feel frustrated over her hot and cold behavior. It was just how she was with everyone, and if Agatha hated anything it was being inconsistent.
As you prepared to leave, you noticed someone entering the building. It was a woman you had never seen before.
She was beautiful, you noted, and wore an expensive looking pale pink pantsuit. Holding a matching clutch in her hand, she took off her designer sunglasses and she appeared to be lost. When she noticed you, her face lit up, heels click-clacking on the floor as she walked over to you.
“Excuse me,” the woman said, lowering her clutch to her side as she looked at you. “Do you know where Tony Stark’s office is?”
“Oh, yeah it’s right down that hallway. First door on your left,” you answered, pointing in the correct direction.
“Thank you,” the woman replied politely, sticking out her hand to shake yours. “I’m Jennifer Kale, but I’m sure you’ve heard of me.”
The name sounded relatively familiar, but you failed to place how you knew of her. Giving her an apologetic smile, you shook your head.
Jennifer raised her eyebrows, surprise coloring her features. “Well, I’m the founder of Kale Kare. We focus on providing musicians with holistic health and wellness.”
Kale Kare…you had heard of that once or twice, but you still couldn’t remember how. Maybe a social media ad?
“Oh cool,” you said sincerely, blushing slightly at the small smile Jennifer gave you in return. “I’m-”
“I already know who you are,” Jennifer said, and laughed at the dumbfounded look on your face. “I mean, how could I not? Half the city is plastered with posters of your face.”
Oh right, the LA Symphony promotional posters, you had actually passed a few on your way into rehearsal earlier.
“I keep forgetting about those,” you quietly admitted, and Jennifer laughed again.
“Besides, even if I hadn’t seen those, you certainly look like her type,” Jennifer added conversationally, and you froze.
“I’m sorry?”
“Agatha is a lot of things, but she’s always been predictable,” Jennifer sighed, looking you up and down. “You’re not the first soloist she’s been with.”
Letting out a nervous chuckle, you looked down at the ground. “I’m not with Agatha. You must have confused me with someone else.”
“Oh?” Jennifer asked, tilting her head to the side as she regarded you. “Are you not the assistant she was sleeping with back in New York? The one who left for Vienna?”
Oh.
“That’s not…” you trailed off, wondering if maybe you somehow hit your head earlier and were actually dreaming this entire interaction from a concussed state. “That’s not how I’d describe it.”
“I must have it wrong then,” Jennifer shrugged, but gave you a look that suggested she didn’t believe you. “That’s just what I had heard.”
“Heard from who?” You hesitantly questioned, as you had been under the impression you and Agatha had been rather discreet during the time you spent together.
“You know how musicians are, always gossiping,” Jennifer offered, giving you a wink. “But I guess they were mistaken.”
There had been a few instances in which you had wondered if you and Agatha weren’t as careful as you once thought. But, replaying the conversation you just shared with Monica, you wondered if there was truth to what Jennifer was suggesting. Both that you were less discrete than you thought, and more troubling- that Agatha actually cared when you left.
No, that can’t be it. You were sure Agatha’s attitude after you left didn’t have anything to do with you, she didn’t strike you as the type to pine.
If only you had been as lucky in that department.
“Yeah, they must have been,” you insisted, trying to shove those thoughts to the back of your mind.
Maybe you should talk to Monica later, get some peace of mind.
“I thought I smelled the faint stench of desperation and fraud,” Agatha’s voice cut through the awkward silence that had filled the hallway, and you jumped at the sound.
The conductor approached you and Jennifer, hands in her purple dress slacks as she sauntered over, a hesitant Scott closely following her. “What pray tell have we lowly peasants done to deserve such a pleasant surprise, Jen?”
“I’d say it’s nice to see you again Agatha, but lying is more your specialty than mine,” Jennifer greeted the conductor, a smile tugging on her lips. “I’ve heard you’ve been keeping busy.”
Agatha sniffed, tossing her bag at Scott, nearly taking him down to the ground. “No more than usual. What are you doing here?”
“I’m expanding my business to the LA Symphony,” Jennifer announced, her eyes locked on Agatha’s. “I have a meeting with Tony to go over our upcoming partnership.”
“Oh good, another potential lawsuit to add to your ever growing collection,” Agatha quipped, raising her left hand as her index finger tapped against her cheek, a contemplative expression on her face. “By the way, how are your legal woes faring?”
It was then you remembered how you knew of Kale Kare…Agatha. The conductor had once briefly ranted about the company and its founder, Jennifer. It was unsurprising that Agatha wasn’t sold on the holistic remedies that the company swore by, but you never asked what had happened between the two of them that made the conductor as sour as she appeared to be.
“Funny, Agatha, but almost all of those were thrown out by the judge,” Jennifer fired back, and you wondered what ‘almost all of those’ meant. “Besides, based on what I’ve been told, you could actually benefit from some of our treatments.”
Agatha pursed her lips, the frown lines on her forehead becoming more prominent as she arched an eyebrow. “I highly doubt that, I’d be surprised if any of that goop you sell is actually organic.” Turning to Scott, she tossed her keys at him, shaking her head as he fumbled attempting to catch them. “Lang, why don’t you make yourself useful and go lock up my office.”
Scott looked thankful to be excused from the conversation, as he scurried away. You had to admit, you were slightly jealous he was able to leave, as you were currently stuck between Agatha and Jennifer.
“Well Stephen certainly seems to think differently,” Jennifer continued, taking a step closer to the conductor, folding her arms across her chest.
“Of course he’s one of your clients. That man has been living in LA for far too long,” Agatha deadpanned, shooting Jennifer a nasty glare.
“Typical Agatha, hiding behind some biting insults,” Jennifer observed, giving you a quick once over. “Besides, there’s no need to be so humble. I’m sure your…soloist was flattered by it.”
“Flattered by what?” You questioned, looking back and forth between the conductor and Jennifer, confusion growing.
“You didn’t tell her, did you?” Jennifer guessed, poorly attempting to stifle a laugh whilst Agatha balled her hands into fists at her side. “It’s nice to see you haven’t changed, Agatha.”
“Didn’t tell me what?” You asked, focusing on Agatha who shrugged in response.
“That’s my cue,” Jennifer said, brushing her hand against your arm as she started to walk away. “It was nice to meet you, good luck with your concerts.”
“Thanks,” you mumbled, waiting until the woman was out of earshot before narrowing your eyes at Agatha. “Agatha, what was she talking about?”
“Ignore her, all of those wellness treatments and supplements have made her more delusional than normal,” Agatha insisted, wrapping an arm around your shoulder to turn you around in the opposite direction.
Your breath hitched at the physical contact, but attempted to remain your composure. “I thought we were done with the games. What aren’t you telling me?”
Agatha froze for a moment, eyes shifting around before refocusing, not removing her arm from where it was wrapped around your shoulders. “It’s nothing to worry about, dear. Jen just enjoys getting under my skin.”
Only, the more you thought about it the more you realized you didn’t believe her. There were far too many inconsistencies in the conductor’s stories, but what you were failing to grasp was why she wasn’t just telling you the truth.
What she was doing in LA. What happened to Stephen, because that particular question had more bad possibilities than good. Where she had been traveling to so secretly for the past year.
Why she refused to talk about your almost kiss.
Shaking her arm off, you shook your head. “No. This isn’t like before, Agatha. I’m not just some assistant you can boss around and belittle.”
“I don’t think I ever belittled you,” Agatha lightly corrected you, and you let out a deep sigh.
“That’s not the point.”
“Oh? Is there a point to this little temper tantrum?” Agatha questioned as she crossed her arms across her chest. “I was worried you were breaking barriers and rising above the diva allegations most soloists succumb to. It’s nice to see that isn’t the case.”
“That’s really nice,” you said sarcastically, attempting to keep your temper in check. “What did Jennifer mean when she brought up Stephen?”
There was a flash of displeasure on the conductor’s face before she masked it.
Giving you a sly grin, she winked. “Are you interrogating me, dear? Should we take this somewhere more private?”
“Stop it,” you said dismissively, growing more irritated with every word she spoke. “Why can’t you just give me a straight answer.”
“Well I think we both know the answer to that,” Agatha teased, leaning in closer until her breath was warm against your face. “But if you need a reminder, I’d be more than happy to provide one.”
“Stop it,” you repeated, patience wearing thin.
Agatha always enjoyed having the upper hand, and as easy as it felt to slip back into a role you were once very comfortable with, things had changed. You changed. Deciding to switch up your line of questioning, you thought back to what Monica had just shared with you.
“Why did you go through so many assistants after I left?”
Agatha noticeably tensed at that, her eyebrows furrowing and she took a step back, putting her hands in her pockets. “I’m afraid I don’t know what you’re referring to.”
“Of course you don’t,” you said, letting out a bitter laugh as Agatha’s expression hardened.
“Whatever it is you’re implying, I suggest you stop. Maybe spend more time focusing on your upcoming performance,” Agatha suggested, lips curling upwards to form a smirk. “After all, we wouldn’t want a repeat of last week’s…incident, would we?”
The memory of your anxiety attack and conversation that had followed with Agatha came rushing back to you. You bowed your head, feeling your cheeks warm at the humiliating reminder.
“I should have known better,” you mumbled, each second you chose to stay in this conversation proving to be a mistake. “I thought maybe you missed me, but you aren’t capable of feeling that way towards anyone, are you?”
Agatha’s eyes flashed menacingly, and she recoiled as if you struck her. Turning on her heel she stormed off without another word, leaving you alone once again.
The regret hit as soon as she was out of sight, you knew you shouldn’t have said that to her. But then again, maybe if she was more forthcoming and honest with you, then you wouldn’t have snapped.
Agatha had a special talent to make you lose your mind, in more ways than one. She was unlike anyone you had ever met, and as many positives as that held there was the occasional reminder of her darker side.
You sometimes questioned if any of her feelings for you back then were real, or if she just got off on the power trip.
It was hard, being this torn, and as much as you still cared for her you were starting to get the feeling that it wasn’t reciprocated. At least, not in the way you wanted it to be. You didn’t just want to go back to how things were before. You weren’t just an assistant anymore, you had made a name for yourself.
It was foolish to think you’d ever be as well-known or talented as Agatha, but you liked to believe that you were on a more equal footing this time around.
But it appeared Agatha didn’t feel the same way.
As you finally left for the day, one of the interns came running up with a bag addressed to you. Apparently Jennifer Kale had left some of her products for you to try, along with a note suggesting the two of you talk about a possible PR partnership for the brand.
You spent the rest of your afternoon and evening the way you typically did when you needed to unwind and not spend too much time practicing. Setting your violin in the sitting room, you spent a few hours curled up on the couch reading a book. You would periodically check your phone, some part of you secretly waiting for a text or message from Agatha, but there was nothing.
It did cross your mind that maybe you should apologize, but knew it was moot. You both needed time to cool off.
Deciding to look at the products Jennifer gifted you, it wasn’t a surprise that everything looked and smelled nice enough. Her company certainly seemed to spend enough time with the presentation, as the bottles were all beautiful and almost looked like potion vials. You decided to try out one of the face masks, and you briefly read a few of the ingredients.
A small voice did question how 100% natural it was, but it smelled nice and it was free so you weren’t going to complain.
You were so wrapped up in applying the face mask you barely heard your doorbell ring. It took you a moment to register the noise, and you checked the time on your phone to reveal it was half past ten. You weren’t expecting company, so you ignored it, spreading the mask evenly over your face.
The buzzing of your phone caused you to pause, rinsing your hands in the sink before grabbing the device to reveal you had a new text message.
Agatha: Knock knock
After your last conversation with the conductor she was the last person you wanted to see right now, but if there was one thing Agatha was, it was persistent. The doorbell rang again and you huffed, she really had some nerve.
Storming out of the bathroom, you whipped the front door open, revealing Agatha with her finger pressed against the doorbell. The conductor’s dark brown hair was pulled back with a hair tie, loose strands flying everywhere. You did a double take at her casual attire, the baggy black sweatpants and tight fitting t-shirt that read ‘What’s The Difference Between A Conductor And God? God Doesn’t Think He’s A Conductor’.
“Took you long enough,” Agatha mused, nose scrunching in disgust when she saw what you had on your face. “Didn’t realize you were interested in having hives break out across your face.”
“What do you want, Agatha?” You questioned, ignoring her jab.
The conductor paused, appearing to realize how irritated you were. Her bright blue eyes were locked on your own, and she took a small step forward, placing her hands against yours. “Can I come in?”
“You’re joking,” you retorted, the earlier argument still ringing in your ears. “You have to be joking. No, you cannot come in. Goodnight, Agatha.”
As you went to slam the door in her face, she stuck her foot in, blocking it. She gave you a rare pleading glance. “Please?”
You could count on one hand the number of times she had ever said that word to you, or to anyone for that matter. Feeling your annoyance fade slightly, you relented. Moving to the side to allow her to come in, trying to restrain the shiver of feeling her body brush against yours.
“What are you doing here?” You asked again, folding your arms across your chest after you shut the door, locking it.
The conductor was looking at you with an unreadable expression, as her tongue slowly licked her lips. Your eyes were fixated on the gesture, unable to look away until you finally cleared your throat, forcing yourself to look at her with a newfound sense of confidence.
“If you don’t have anything to say I think you should be going,” you asserted, something that surprised both you and the conductor as she raised her eyebrows.
“You’re wrong,” the conductor said, so quietly you could barely hear her.
“What?”
“You’re wrong,” Agatha repeated, louder this time.
“If you came here to insult me, you can leave,” you stated, going to open the door.
It was hard to say how it happened, really. Agatha was a lot faster than she looked, and she had your back pressed against the wall, hands pinned at your sides before you could blink. She towered over you, chest heaving as you felt her breath hot against your neck.
“Agatha…”
“I’ve never met anyone as stubborn as you,” Agatha breathed out, releasing one hand to gently cup your chin, forcing you to look up at her. “Do you have any idea how infuriating you are?”
You blinked, feeling your head spin as you wondered if this was really happening. Agatha had made countless appearances in your dreams over the years, each feeling more real than the last. It felt like she was haunting you, a cruel shadow you could never escape from.
But this was real, you noted as you breathed in the subtle but rich scent of her floral shampoo. After all this time, she was really here.
“Agatha,” you whispered again, heart pounding against your chest as blood rushed in your ears.
The conductor released your other hand, raising her own to tangle in your hair as she pulled you impossibly closer to her, lips ghosting over your own.
Before you could form a coherent thought, Agatha finally did the one thing you had been yearning for since you left her all those years ago, closing the distance as she smashed her lips against yours.
All of the times you had reminisced on this, the random bodies you had used as replacements over the years, nothing could ever come close to the real thing. The very real feeling of Agatha’s mouth moving fervently against your own, as she hungrily drank from you like a woman dying of thirst. Her tongue darted out, seeking entrance to your mouth and you could only let out a small whimper as she deepened the kiss.
Agatha let out a muffled groan at that, growing more desperate in her attempts to unravel you, which is why you let out a disappointed whine as she broke away, fingers still woven in your hair.
Panting, the conductor closed her eyes, trying to catch her breath, and you were thankful she had you pressed against the wall because you doubt you’d be able to stand on your own. When she reopened them, her pupils were fully blown out. Her hand caressed your cheek, and you leaned into the tender gesture.
“I missed you,” Agatha murmured, and she was holding you so delicately, like she was afraid you would break if she pushed too far.
“I missed you too,” you echoed, feeling tears begin to swell in your eyes.
You thought getting your big break as a soloist would fix the giant hole leaving Agatha had created. But despite all you had accomplished, it still felt like something was missing. You had tried everything, but it wasn’t until this very moment, feeling Agatha’s body flush against your own, with her bright blue eyes searing into your soul, did you come to the startling revelation of what you had been missing.
Agatha.
It was always Agatha.
#agatha harkness x reader#agatha all along#agatha harkness#agatha harkness fanfiction#agatha harkness x fem!reader
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How To Get Roughly 50 Notes On An Original Writing Post And Possibly Net A Single Reader
I had someone ask today how I get people to click through and read my writing, and I'm realizing that I've never actually made a post all in one place of everything I do to get a new piece of short fiction off the ground... so here you go! How to get (some) eyes on your work, even if it is not published anywhere of interest and you don't have a marketing team behind you.
The #1 thing is presentation. You want to get people's attention, and once you have it, convince them to keep paying attention. Fortunately, people tend to be both reasonable and predictable, which means all you have to do is follow The Formula.
(original post link)
Here's the formula from the above post broken down:
[giant horizontal title card, preferably animated to catch the eye] OR [a few tasteful parallels, if you're good at parallel posts]
TITLE (linked to where you can read the piece) / wordcount
a quote that is representative of the tone, themes, prose style, and/or the "promise of the premise"
A longer pitch, featuring the overall subject of the piece (transsexual reality TV drama), any comp titles (Detransition, Baby), the main draw (in this case, watching trans people be awful to clueless cis people), major themes (performance), and any other promises you'd like to make (food romance and tigers). You can see that the quote I chose delivers on the promise of trans people intellectually outperforming cis people-- if I were a reader, I would be more likely to trust that the rest of the pitch was accurate based on that assurance.
If you have any positive reviews on your piece, say so. If it has won any awards or contests, say so. If your work has made people cry, Doja Cat - Say So. Always. Generally speaking, more personal and more detailed is better, but keep it to one or two people-- e.g. "when I gave this to my S/O to read he shot milk out of his nose so far I had to go clean under the couch" or "my favorite review of this piece is the reader who said they read it chapter-by-chapter under their covers because they wanted it all to themself." This should be one sentence.
Depending on where the story is published, what you usually promote, etc., it may be worthwhile saying the story is free. Use your judgment on whether the reader can tell.
I also like putting my links at the bottom so someone seeing this on a friend's dash can easily track me around the 'Net. They make me look more professional (I now include a link to my website) and they visually balance the post, in my opinion. This post also happened to have some additional links for bonus content.
This is not as high stakes as it seems. I'm not 100% happy with the pitch here, and I'm not 100% happy with the graphics I've used in other cases. These are some bones that help to sell the piece even when the details aren't as sharp.
REBLOGGING
When is the last time you read something the first time you saw it on your dash? I schedule reblogs of all important posts at least twice over the next 2-3 days, often three times so I can get the morning/afternoon/evening reblog. If your followers tend to be more active at certain times, go ahead and use those. In the past I've intentionally scheduled posts for times I knew more popular mutuals were active, and it has paid off!
I also schedule a reblog for a week and a month and sometimes even a full calendar year out, because I know there is going to be that person who tags the piece '#to read' and instantly forgets about it, only to get excited when they see it weeks later. I am very often that reader. The goal is to catch people when they're ready to read immediately, and this is a game of chance.
Every so often, I go through my entire #writing or #important writing updates or even just #popular tag(s) and queue two dozen posts before shuffling my queue to redistribute matters. This keeps my older work circulating, ensuring new readers get a chance to see older pieces and giving those older pieces another shot at dashboard space. (More on #popular later.) This sounds like a lot, which is why you have to space everything pretty far apart. Fortunately, this is the world's best site for cool things to reblog. I guarantee you that you can find something new you love to post in the meanwhile.
COPING WITH FAME
The post above is what I, a published author, consider "doing well" for a post about my writing on Tumblr. As of October 10th, 2024, over two years after its initial posting and over five years into my posting doggedly about my original fiction, it has 77 notes. More than half (43) are likes. Around half of the reblogs are me promoting my own work or the same very sweet person dutifully reblogging me every time I do so. Glancing through the reblogs now, I know of four people whom I can confirm have read it. Presumably, there are more who are completely silent and have never interacted with the post whatsoever. Genuinely: wahoo!! I am so grateful and happy for the attention and reception of my work.
This is the number one thing I suggest: focus on what you have, and not what you lack. Imagine your post from the perspective of an outsider: even one reblog means you convinced that one person to spread your art! How cool is that! This is also good advice because moping is simply not helpful; it will not get you more reads. (And no, neither will guilting others. Kill that vent post in your head!)
GETTING FOLLOWERS
I don't have that many followers. Of the followers I do have, people are very unpredictably active. When I hear about other people's follower counts I am consistently surprised, because people with half of mine will have fans and haters the likes of which I could not possibly dream of. I follow 500-follower folk who post "I ate a strawberry today" and get 6 asks ranging from "Wow I respect you so much for eating that strawberry" to "I'm going to come to your address at [REDACTED REDACTED REDACTED] and shove bananas down your throat for hating on my favorite fruit."
I point this out to establish three important things. 1) Be grateful for what you have (in my case, 0 anonymous hate asks about fruitpinions), 2) followers have far less impact on interaction than one might think, and 3) followers don't engage with the things you might like them to.
Think about yourself. Are you more likely to reblog a photo of a cat in a pumpkin (alright, here) or something advertising fifteen minutes' worth of writing, which could be, for all you know, bad? Or, for that matter, by a person you should not like to support? Reblogs on generically interesting things are 'safer' (unfortunately) than reblogs on art, and it makes perfect sense that people are skittish around the latter. People don't often reblog things they haven't read, and nobody can reblog every artpost on their dash. Having someone else put it there, however, is incredibly powerful—someone's vetted this post as Worth a Reblog, after all. Having more followers allows for much more of this.
(Followers don't guarantee any one sort of interaction, but having more of them is rarely bad. Rarely.)
Across my most popular posts, one theme becomes very obvious: people like things that apply to them or their blog. I try to post writing advice/opinions/memes every so often, because I know I have a loyal base of writerfolk who like to see that from me, and it's "easier" to reblog than my writing. This is simply the nature of the universe. I used to pretty frequently go into the #writeblr tag and check out what was recently popular so I could figure out how to serve the same base, and from time to time it worked.
You're welcome to examine the list of #writing posts that made it to 100 notes, because each tends to have a notable reason behind its success: a reblog with an exceptionally good review, a contest win, a wordcount that lends itself to pasting the whole thing in one go.
(Posts about my book's release are a notable exception, in part due to Blaze and in part due to my absolutely relentless flogging of their reblog buttons during the ~year of promotion. Also in large part to a dedicated circle of friends who passed the post around nonstop! Thank you so much!!)
A lot of people will tell you to attempt covert reciprocal promotion. You know—reblog a lot of stuff, in the hopes that people will reblog yours. If I could change one thing on Tumblr, it would be this: the culture that quietly encourages disingenously interacting with other people with a secret True Goal in mind. (On the autism website.)
Please, for the love of all that is good and holy, do not do this. If you comment on other people's work, do it because you're happy to do so. When I released Paper Tigress, I went through everybody else who responded to the same prompt and read their work, because I had the day off and I was curious. This has led to Paper Tigress having more comments on Reedsy than one of my contest winners, and even outranking the shortlisted story in the same prompt category. However, this would have been a waste of my time if I did not genuinely enjoy reading the other stories. I read 80+ stories, taking several hours, and gained 30 comments from the venture (half my comments are my responses).
Crucially, I do not promote other writers' work on Tumblr in the hopes of them reading or boosting mine. This is the #1 tip I see thrown around that I viscerally disagree with. While, again, I am grateful for engagement with my work regardless of the context, I do not want people suffering through my work in the hopes that I will promote them. I work a full-time job, and my reading calendar is perpetually overbooked, including with work by my absolute best of friends. Even if it wasn't, I think it would be quite insulting if I were posting works in the hopes that someone would choke it down like medicine. I post what I think is good so that people can read and enjoy it. If you are not enjoying it, I do not want you to feel as though you have to read it. My aim is to give to others what my favorite authors have given me, which is most certainly not A Bad Time Spent Being Dishonest In The Hopes Of Getting Something Back. You have better things to do with your time. Please be honest.
CONCLUSION
Realistically, the readers I have, I gained through being a published author for five years promoting my behind off on Tumblr, the least forgiving social media for promotion. People like it when you have a book they can buy, especially if it has Goodreads reviews that make it look like you have been vetted for them. Many people who follow me have read only Something's Not Right and nothing else. (Many people who follow me have read everything but Something's Not Right.) I have posted dozens of pieces on Tumblr and Wattpad (and AO3). I gained a small number of readers writing and posting fanfiction for the Locked Tomb Tri(?)logy, even though I marketed it absolutely terribly.
Just keep writing. Keep writing, keep posting, and keep making sure everyone who follows you knows you write. And keep writing because you want to. There's no better advice than that.
#writeblr#writeblr advice#writeblr tutorial#writeblr tips#writeblr community#writing advice#writers on tumblr#important writing updates#txt
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oh, hi.
it has been a hot ass minute but i'm back baybeee. seriously though, if you're still here, still reading this, and still excited there was an update, thank you from the bottom of my heart. i love u guys to pieces!! enjoy <3
The cotton candy hues of the sunset were fading to nothing as he pulled into the long driveway to his house. Lights illuminated the edge of the path, but his house sat dark at the very end until he opened the gate, passed through, waited for it to close behind him, then signaled the garage to open. As soon as he opened the garage, his phone began to ring.
The shrill ringtone was enough to make his heart skip a beat in his chest before he realized the name and photo on his screen. Golden Boyo flashed across the top accompanied by a picture of the two of them holding a World Cup trophy high above their heads.
A heavy sigh escaped deep from within Rowan’s chest and he almost didn’t answer. His heavily tattooed thumb hovered over the deny button until he realized he had hardly texted anyone back all weekend. The thought of leaving his friends in the dust didn’t sit right with him when he knew for a fact that Aelin would likely yell at him for it until she was blue in the face and needed to lie down.
Against his better judgment, he answered. Even worse: he showed up at the bar his teammates were meeting up near Lorcan’s place. While he needed to be fully ready for practice, his friendships needed nurturing as well. It didn’t matter that he felt old and tired. It had been awhile since he met up with the guys and by the time Rowan was a few beers in, he felt better about the whole situation.
“We have practice tomorrow,” Lorcan reminded Fenrys. His tone was stern, his words were the law. It didn’t, however, change the way Fen’s eyes were roaming the bar looking for a body to explore all night. Rowan smirked, feeling the buzz from his drinks.
“That’s never stopped me before.” Fenrys winked at a man near the dartboard and Rowan watched as a rosy blush crept over the man’s face. No, it had never stopped him before. It was a lesson he still hadn’t learned: a sex marathon the night before practice or a game never did him any good. In fact, it made him play like absolute shit most of the time. “Speaking of people we’re bedding, how’s Aelin doing?”
“We aren’t sleeping together,” Rowan muttered into his pint glass. “She’s been sick a lot. Thankfully she can work from home most of the time.”
“Are we sure—“ Lorcan began, but Rowan held up a hand to stop him. He wasn’t dealing with his bullshit tonight regarding the legitimacy of the pregnancy. Rowan had no doubts, and was even happy. Lorcan was just looking out, but it didn’t stop the irritation that flooded him when he brought out his accusations and reservations.
“We’re positive. They’re the best ace I’ve ever gotten.”
“That’s cute,” Fenrys swooned. His chin was propped on his fist while he looked at Rowan.
“What?”
“You called them an ace.” Warmth bloomed up his neck, all the way to the tips of his ears. The alcohol had loosened his lips and let the truth flow freely.
“Well,” he grumbled. “All it took was once and now I’m the happiest I’ve ever been.”
“You’re pathetic,” was all Lorcan said in response. Rowan couldn’t disagree. He was nothing if not a love sick puppy waiting for his girl to really come around to the idea of them.
Pathetic, indeed.
~*~
The blender was a blur of green and entirely too loud. Rowan was definitely getting old if the few beers he had the night before led to such a hangover. Being out so late last night was probably a mistake, but it had been fun to hang out with the guys outside of practice for once. Rowan was feeling it this morning though, already several pain killers deep. Water. He needed a lot of water.
He knew the greens and hydration would cure his ailments, but the sound of his phone buzzing might send him over the edge first. When his phone started ringing, he wanted to throw it into the blender, too.
Rowan wiped a towel over his face. His pulse pounded in his skull while sweat slipped down his face in lazy rivers from the workout that had kicked his ass. He stared down at his phone, the screen lighting up with the one person he truly had been avoiding since his relationship with Aelin began.
MOM CALLING…
He needed to call her. It was bad enough that his relationship was now public and he’d barely told his mom anything about Aelin, but he really needed to clue her in on the pregnancy. If that got out before it came from him she would be deeply wounded and he didn’t like the sound of that.
The texts she sent him were always a myriad of questions about Aelin. His mom wanted to know what she was like, where she was from, what her hobbies were. Most of that could be found on a google search, but his mom was old and barely had a grasp on the internet. Iris Whitethorn preferred books and newspapers to even learning what the internet had to offer. It was the only reason he had hope that he would beat the world to the pregnancy announcement. Regardless, the papers weren’t how he wanted to find out about his relationship, and she had.
He needed to be a better son.
That little fact hit him harder when he looked through his texts with his mom. All of them were incoming with varying questions about the girl in the photos. What was going on? Who was she? She’s awfully pretty. Rowan felt like he barely had any answers, so he hadn’t responded. While he sipped down his green juice and devoured his breakfast, he vowed to respond to her later today. A phone call was in order for all the shit he had to relay to her at this point.
Was a phone call enough to tell her about the baby? Probably not. Fuck.
Rowan’s hands raked through his hair while he gave himself a moment to groan his frustrations into the universe, hoping the answers would come back to him. There was no time for him to go see her soon. By the time he found a date that would work for both he and Aelin, it might be too late. She could be showing by then with rumors swirling through the media. He had no fucking idea how to tell her anyway. A flurry of emotions ran through his mind while he changed and got ready for practice. All of this would, unfortunately, have to wait.
Nothing yet from Aelin.. Rowan frowned. Sure, it was a bright and early 7 AM, but she was usually already up and getting her day started. He texted her first, wishing her a good day with hopes she felt better.
Rowan sighed heavily. The secret he was keeping curled into a ball in the pit of his stomach. He wasn’t sure how much longer he could avoid telling her. Well, avoid wasn’t the right word. He just didn’t have the words to tell her he got a girl he barely knows pregnant and, yes, it’s actually his baby. It was still early, anyway. Still, it wasn’t sitting right with him. He would make a trip to go and see her soon and tell her then.
>> Mom: I want to know about this girl you’re seeing, Rowan Matthias.
<< Rowan: I’ll call you after practice. I promise.
>> Mom: You better.
~*~
Last night had been fun, but all the sprints and drills during practice were making Rowan nauseous. For the second time today, sweat was streaking down his entire body while he squirted water into his mouth. Gods, Coach was on one. It was like he knew every time there was a night out and made them work even harder.
Rowan was relieved when they were told to hit the showers. The guys followed behind him, Fenrys groaning about a persistent headache between his eyes. Even Lorcan, who was an absolute tank when it came to alcohol, was cursing and moaning. It would have been funny if he wasn’t in the same boat.
The steaming shower he stepped into was almost holy. Hot water pelted his body while he washed himself, taking a little more time than usual because of his ailments. He could feel his muscles loosening with every breath he took and Gods, it felt so good. When he finally wrapped it up, he quickly dried and got dressed. His friends were teasing each other while they did the same.
“Go a little too hard last night, Lorcan?” Fenrys crooned, wrapping his golden curls into a messy bun atop his head.
“I really don’t think you want to go down this road, pup,” he grumbled back. A smile twitched at the corner of Rowan’s lips as he grabbed his phone, deciding now was as good a time as any to call his mother.
“Hello?” Her sweet voice chimed after two rings.
“Good morning, mama,” he said, zipping his bag and tossing it over his shoulder.
“You’ve been ignoring my calls.” Not a question, though there was some hurt behind her words. Rowan rubbed the bridge of his nose.
“Just busy with practice and games.”
“Is that Aelin?” Fenrys called from across the room. He pulled a shirt on and began to walk over to Rowan. “Is she still sick?”
“Is who still sick?” His mom inquired. Again, he sighed and shot Fen a warning look.
“Aelin has been feeling under the weather, Mom,” he emphasized her name and Fenrys looked immediately apologetic. Great.
“Well, what's the matter? I might have some good advice, you know. You better be taking care of that girl. Has she gotten you sick?”
“Nausea, maybe a stomach bug, no I’m not sick, and no I’m not taking care of her. She won’t let me. Aelin is so independent that I can’t get her to depend on me for anything right now.” It was probably a bigger truth than he was ready to share with his mom, much less all his friends. He made his way out of the locker room and Fen shouted an apology after him. Rowan flippantly waved his hand as the door shut behind him.
“Well, let's start with some remedies. I have just the thing that will help. It’s a tea I drank through my entire pregnancy to fight the nausea and it works like a charm.” Rowan almost choked at the mention of a pregnancy. Did she somehow know already? She couldn’t find out from anyone but him. It would destroy her if she discovered the news on a tabloid site. Fuck.
“That’d be great, I’ll send it to her.”
“Better yet, I’m due for a visit. How about I drive up and make it for her myself?” Shit. Fuck. Godsdamn the universe.
“Mom, right now isn’t really–”
“It’s never a good time,” she interjected. “You’ll be busy regardless. I don’t mind a little time on my own while you practice. It’ll give me plenty of time to get to know Aelin, too.”
“She lives in Varese,” he told her, trying to get her to back down.
“I know she does. Tabloids have pictures of you hanging around there any chance you get. And anyway, Fenrys has loose lips. Tell me her name again?”
“If you’ve seen the news articles, you know her name already.” There were plenty of grainy pictures of them sipping drinks at The Neon Moon, plus pap shots of them everywhere else. Rowan wasn’t used to quite so much attention. Sure, there were the occasional paparazzi that snapped photos of him around town, but with Aelin at his side it seemed to be more than usual.
“Aelin. Her name is Aelin Galathynius, but you already know that.”
“Well, since you aren’t taking care of Aelin I’m going to drive up and do it myself. Sometimes us women just don’t know how to ask for help when it’s needed. Besides, the poor girl doesn’t have her own mother close by to lean on for support. Maternal comfort goes a long way.”
There was no getting out of this. Maybe it would be a good thing, he pondered. They could tell her in person and maybe she wouldn’t go ballistic if Aelin was there. Stressful as all hell, but maybe it could work if he could get Aelin to come stay for a day or two.
“Yeah, okay. See you tomorrow, then?”
“I’ll be there in the morning,” she swore before hanging up. Now he just had to get Aelin to come down.
Rowan slumped down into his car and immediately called Aelin. His thumbs drummed on the steering wheel while it rang and rang, his anxiety building in his gut. A thousand things ran through his head: Was it too soon? Would it be weird? What if they didn’t get along?
“Hey you,” she said when the call connected, her voice like music to his ears. It soothed his anxiety, just talking to her. Just by being her.
“Hi.” It was impossible to stop the smile that crept over his face as he dropped his bag in the backseat and got in his car. “I have a favor to ask and an apology to give.”
“I’m intrigued, do go on.” Rowan chuckled, rubbing the back of his neck. Hervoice filtered through his car speakers, surrounding him wholly.
“Fenrys accidentally told my mom you’ve been sick and now she’s determined that you need her special tea and maternal comfort.”
“Ah,” she said, clearing her throat. “So is the favor meeting your mom? And is the apology for Fenrys?”
“The favor is that you come stay with me for a few days to meet her and let her mother hen you to death because there was no way I was getting out of this scenario while talking to her. But if you refuse I can try to get her to back down.” When Aelin laughed, a weight lifted from his chest. “The apology is for roping you into this mess. And for Fen.”
Aelin laughed, “I accept both. I’d love to meet your mom. Plus, maybe we can tell her about the baby while she’s here.”
Rowan was relieved she was so open to the whole ordeal. His heart squeezed in his chest that she wanted to meet his mom. Fuck, he was so gone for this girl. He was on a free fall and only she could catch him. He wasn’t looking forward to finding out what would happen if she didn’t.
“She’ll be here tomorrow. Is that okay?” He could hear papers shuffling in the background, the sound of a zipper and a small sigh from his girl.
“I’ll pack a suitcase and be there in a bit. I’ll bring my work stuff with me and set up in your office, if that’s okay.”
“What's mine is yours,” he swore.
“Okay,” she said softly, and Rowan could hear the smile in her voice. He was grinning, too.
“Okay. See you soon.”
“See you soon, Ro.” Ro. Was she trying to get him to crash his car from a heart explosion? He disconnected the call as he pulled into his driveway and took a deep breath. This was a good thing, right?
~*~
“Ro?” Aelin called out, stepping through the front door. He’d left it unlocked for her in case he was busy when she arrived.
“Kitchen!” He called back, so Aelin slipped off her shoes and padded through the house until she rounded the corner and saw him standing at the stove.
His sleeves were pushed up above his elbows and an apron was around his neck. A cutting board of vegetables sat on the counter while he stirred something in a pan. It smelled devine, and wasn’t making her stomach turn which was a huge win. Everything was setting it off lately.
“I know tacos are a safe food right now, so I thought we’d try fajitas to switch things up,” he said over his shoulder, turning briefly to grab the cutting board. The contents were dumped into the pan and she circled the counter, pausing beside him. Rowan stirred with his left hand and wrapped his right around her waist. Her stomach fluttered at the contact, but she didn’t pull away.
“Thank you,” she said, pressing a kiss to his shoulder.
“Always.” Aelin smiled up at him before stepping away to get a glass of water.
They made small talk while he cooked, everything from their days to little tidbits of what his mom was like. According to Rowan, she was the best mom in the world. He gushed about her cooking, about how he raised her alone after his father passed away when he was ten. She’s fiercely loyal to her people, and loves Rowan more than anything in the world. If the sun revolved around people, Iris would surely revolve around Rowan. He insisted it would be the same for Aelin and their baby.
The thought warmed her. This baby would have the best community in their corner. Not having to worry about the lack of a village was a huge relief. Everyone was dying to be involved on both sides, and many of Rowan’s teammates contacted Aelin just to check in on her. Aedion and Lysandra were already vying for favorite aunt/uncle. No, this baby would never know what it was like to not feel wholly loved by their people.
After dinner, they cleaned up despite Rowan’s protests that she didn’t need to do anything. Aelin dismissed him with the wave of her hand and worked on the dishes while he put away leftovers. He was right; it was a refreshing change to eat something other than tacos.
“I’m gonna shower,” she sighed, arms stretched above her head. Even though it was still pretty early, she was more than ready to don pajamas, curl up, and decompress from work and the drive down.
“I’m not going anywhere,” was his reply, and she knew he meant it more than just right now. Biting her lip, she slipped out of the kitchen and made her way upstairs.
The best shower in the house was Rowan’s. It had a rainwater shower head that felt so luxurious that Aelin swore she was going to get one for her house in Orynth. As soon as she stepped in she felt the day simply melt away. Hot water trickled down her skin while she carefully washed her body, then her hair. She really needed to get this showerhead. It was the height of luxury at the moment.
After drying off and changing clothes, she went back downstairs and found Rowan on the couch. He had changed clothes and was now in sweatpants and a t-shirt. Something about it was really doing something for Aelin. His tattooed bicep was along the back of the couch and she wanted to trace the lines everywhere they turned. When he looked up at her and grinned, something fluttered in her stomach. Gods, she was so screwed.
“Good shower?”
“Mhm,” she hummed, sitting close enough that his fingers brushed her shoulder. Rowan toyed with the ends of her damp hair for a moment, and Aelin was stunned at how comfortable the silence was. Nothing was being said, or communicated in any way, but it was such a cozy silence. She’d never experienced anything quite like it before.
“Don’t take this the wrong way,” Rowan said carefully, “but you look exhausted.”
Aelin took no offence, laughing as she rubbed her face. It was true. She wasn’t sleeping much, and when she did it was restless. Her hips were already beginning to ache and she wasn’t looking forward to it getting worse as her body grew and changed. Still, she was so tired. Most of the time she was asleep by nine-thirty.
“Because I am,” she sighed. “There’s so much that needs to be done for the foundation before the office launch here. I feel like I’m treading water because there’s always more to do. I love my job, and I can’t wait to see the effects it has on the community, but I think I forgot how much it is. All the events I need to organize, getting the office picture perfect. My team is amazing but some days I get asked so many questions that I never want to speak again.”
“What you’re doing is fantastic, and I will be at every event I can be. However, if you need to take a breather, take one. A day off is okay. You can do all of this, I don’t doubt it, but you are growing a human. It might slow you down a little, but you’ll get it taken care of.”
“I haven’t told my staff yet. I want to wait until my next scan to make sure everything is good before I tell anyone else. Except your mom, if you want to do that while she’s here. Family doesn’t count. Anyway, I think they’ll understand my work-from-home days a little more once the cat is out of the bag. I think Luca is on to me, though. Kid is way too perceptive and I’ve been spending way too much time with him working on the website.”
“I’m sure they’re sympathetic now. Plus, you’re getting everything done you need to, right?”
“Of course. I think that’s part of why I’m so tired. I’ll stay until like eight, and then go home and eat, shower, and go to bed.” She sighed again, fingers running through her hair.
“Why don’t you get some sleep? My mom can be a lot,” he admitted.
“I think I’ll take you up on that offer. I swear I’m usually a lot more fun than this,” she laughed, and he joined in with her. His hand cupped her cheek, thumb running over her skin. There were calluses on his hands that always felt strangely good.
“Goodnight, then.” His hand dropped from her face and she was glad. Heat was creeping onto her cheeks and if she didn’t get out of there, she would look like a tomato soon. It was ridiculous that his touch set her aflame so easily. Aelin wasn’t sure she would ever get used to it.
Upstairs, she wasn’t sure which room to enter. There was Rowan’s room, and then the guest room. They didn’t say anything about sleeping together tonight. Hell, Rowan didn’t broach the topic at all. It was tempting to crawl into his bed, but she turned into the guest room, which was unofficially her room, instead.
~*~
Aelin couldn’t sleep. It was just after ten, and she had maybe dozed off once for a few minutes. Otherwise she was watching the ceiling fan whirring above her head. The house was so quiet. Much better than her apartment, where upstairs neighbors were sometimes a little heavy footed. Not too long ago,she heard Rowan walk down the hall and close his door. She chewed on her lip, gave herself a little pep talk, then pushed out of bed and opened her door before she could talk herself out of it.
Two knocks on his door, followed by a soft, “Rowan?”
“Come in, love,” she heard, muffled through the door. Once it was open she was treated to a shirtless Rowan sitting up in bed. Glasses were perched on his nose and he seemed to be reading a book.
“Hey,” she said, lip tucking between her teeth while she rocked back and forth on her heels.
“Hi,” he chuckled, shutting the book and putting it on his nightstand. “What are you doing awake?”
“I can’t sleep. Plus, like, your mom is under the assumption that we’re together so we probably need to sleep in the same room anyway. Why not start now? And we’re not not together, so it would be weird if we weren’t sleeping in the same room. You know?”
“I think if we’re not not together, that means we’re together, Aelin.” A smile was tugging at his lips and she wanted to kiss it until she saw all of his teeth. She took it as her chance to walk over and get in bed with him, wiggling down in the blankets and pillows until she was fully enveloped in his scent.
“Call it what you want,” she shrugged, the blanket covering the little grin on her face.
“What are you calling it?” Rowan tilted his head slightly, glasses sliding down his nose. Gods, he was so… there were so many words for what he was right now. All of them were positive because this look and banter was really doing it for her.
“You know I’m calling you my boyfriend.” Aelin’s eyes rolled in an attempt to seem nonchalant.
“You can trust me, Aelin,” he said softly, hand reaching to cover hers. Their fingers slid together seamlessly, and more of that fluttery nonsense took over her stomach. She licked her lips, eyes focused on their hands.
“I know.” And she did. They barely knew each other, yet she knew he was becoming a safe person for her. There weren’t too many of those anymore. Her inner circle was small, yet she knew that because of Rowan, it was growing.
“Yeah?” His finger bumped beneath her chin and she looked at him, fighting the tears that threatened to pour over.
“You’re going to make me cry, and then your mom is going to be here in the morning while I have a puffy, red face. I’ll look like a little tomato and I’ll be really mad about it.” Rowan snorted, leaning forward to kiss her forehead.
“A beautiful tomato,” he said, lips pressing to the top of her head like he couldn’t help himself. Beneath the blankets, she was smiling.
“Maybe after your mom leaves… maybe we can talk before I go back to Wendlyn?” She lowered the blankets beneath her chin and looked up at him. A single tear had managed to escape and he wiped it with his fingertips.
“It’s a date,” he promised, nodding his head almost too-eagerly. Clearly he was waiting for this moment. Aelin hated that she had to be so guarded these days, but there was too much damage in her past to not be. Her heart had been crushed into oblivion before, and she couldn’t risk it. Now that a baby was involved? Gods, she had to be so, so careful.
“Why haven’t you kissed me yet?” She finally asked, tucking her bottom lip between her teeth. Rowan’s eyes widened at the inquiry, mouth opening and closing several times before he found letters to string into a sentence.
“I wasn’t sure you were ready for that,” he said slowly, reaching out to tuck a piece of hair behind her ear. Aelin smiled, a whisper of a laugh escaping her mouth.
“I’m ready to be kissed, Rowan.”
It seemed that he didn’t have to be told twice. Rowan leaned in and kissed her lips softly as if testing the waters. Aelin was the one to melt into him, fingers braiding into his hair to pull him closer. He groaned quietly, parting his lips and she was more than eager to sweep her tongue against his.
Gods, yes. This. There had been moments where she wondered if the tension was only that. Just tension that fizzled out after the first entanglement. The feeling in the pit of her stomach told her otherwise. Butterflies fluttered up her ribcage and she gasped. It wasn’t a one time thing. If she played her cards right… she could have this forever.
The thought clanged through her, sobering her enough that she tugged on his hair a little. Rowan groaned and it really didn’t help dampen her desire. The sound was delicious, something she wanted to eat like cake until he had nothing else to give her.
“Rowan,” she finally sighed, his lips closing over her pulse. Fuck, it felt so good. “We said slow.”
“This is slow,” he murmured, teeth grazing her skin and tongue doing the laziest swirl over her skin. Oh, gods.
“Slower,” she laughed, taking his face in her hands and pulling him away herself before her resolve withered into nothing.
“Whatever you want,” he promised, licking his lips. Rowan’s cheeks were flushed and she had to lean in and kiss them both, planting one more on his lips. It would be a lie if she said she wasn’t melting at the sight of him, rosy cheeks and crinkles by his eyes from smiling.
“I know it’s not easy–”
“I’ll do anything you want. I’ll wait until you’re ready. Not just for sex. For everything.” Everything. Aelin’s heart fluttered madly in her chest, shaking her ribcage. Wasn’t that the part she was most scared of? It excited the hell out of her at the same time. Everything with Rowan was scary, and yet… Aelin found herself looking forward to it.
It was easy to curl up in his arms, head on his chest. One of his hands traced sleepy shapes over her back and shoulders, and when sleep came to claim her, she had no say in the matter. Feeling safer than she had in awhile, she counted the beats of his heart until she fell asleep.
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