#unless you’re attracted to badasses stalking towards you

[cheeri0-queeri0]

My First Two Loves (WLW version): Chapter 3

Is she gaping? Emma has to be gaping.

“Ava… y-you and… Mason? Are…”

Ava grins rakishly, rubbing a hand along Mason’s back. “Madly in love? Or, well, lust - we haven’t gotten to that other L-word yet.”

Nails. Nails are being driven into her heart.

For his part, Mason looks taken aback by her reaction. “I meant to tell you last night, Emma.”

“You could’ve texted!” A lump is rising in her throat.

Mason scratches the back of his head. “I wanted to tell you in person. I tried to call, but when the line kept dropping, I thought…this is better?”

No. No it is not. It is one million times worse.

“Yeah, you’re right!” Emma forces the words to come out chipper, forces a placid smile. “I… I’m speechless. Congrats, you two.”

Congrats on secretly shattering her heart. But hey, what’s another secret to the now-sure-to-grow pile?

Mason’s shoulders relax, the tension falling from his face as he turns to Ava. “I almost forgot, babe! I got a little something for you.” He reaches over on the hood of Ava’s car where he put a cute little thermos.

Ava tentatively takes it from him, eyes wide in surprise. “Caramel macchiato?”

Mason gives her a shy, crooked smile. “With two shakes of cinnamon.”

Ava’s favorite.

The girl slings her other arm around his neck and rests her head against his cheek. “You remembered! Best boyfriend ever!”

Emma...is going to combust from agony.

“You guys are just so...perfect together,” she grits out, hoping it sounds passably pleasant.

Ava’s eyes find hers, softening just a bit.

Mason lets out a breathy laugh that seems more like a sigh of relief. “See, Ava, I told you she’d be happy for us!”

Ava blinks, breaking her gaze away. “I knew she would be. She is my bestie, after all.” There’s something off about her tone. If she hadn’t told Emma in the car that they were still solid despite Lauren dying to usurp her place, Emma would worry that maybe they weren’t best friends anymore.

Hell, maybe she’s still a little worried. And now for more than the Lauren reason.

“I should leave you alone for some...couple time. Catch you later!” Cue an ungraceful escape.

Mason jogs to catch up. “There’s so many times I tried to call. To tell you.” His voice turns plaintive. “Emma, I just want to double check. Are you okay with this?”

No! I am unequivocally not okay with this! God, how badly Emma wants to shout that at the top of her lungs. If she said it, Mason is exactly the kind of guy who would follow through and break up. He’s good. And that’s the problem.

“Mason. I’m happy for you. And for Ava.”

“...Yeah? Because your happiness means a lot to me.”

And now she has to sell it. “Yeah. I’m stoked. You’re so cute together. I should’ve played matchmaker years ago.” That...might have been overkill. “I just have some things to take care of right now. Talk later, okay?”

Mason nods. It worked. “I’ll hold you to that.”

Emma power-walks away, tears pricking at her eyes as she let her feet take her anywhere else.

After a short time, she rounds a corner, realizing too late that she’s behind the gym near the back parking lot she usually avoided.

And she wasn’t alone.

“Hey there, princess. What brings you to my place of business?” The boy is smarmy, leaning against the brick wall, hair gelled so thickly it wouldn’t move even in a tornado.

Emma stills, confused. “Your...uh, what?”

He frowns, pushing off the wall and wandering closer. “My store. My shop. My livelihood. What you buying?”

Oh. Shit. “I’m not - I’m just trying to get away from some people - ”

The boy comes to a stop too close. “Save it. A sob story won’t get a discount.” He looked her up and down, calculating. Though he definitely didn’t look like someone who was good at math. “Adderall. Has to be. A study buddy. Everyone needs one, right?”

He yanks a plastic bag out of his pocket.

“Oh, no thanks. I appreciate it, but I am not interested.”

His jaw works, clenching and unclenching. “The offer isn’t optional anymore. You saw what I’m selling. You’re part of this.” He takes one more step, his Axe body spray stinging the inside of Emma’s nose. “Now open up that bag and find me two hundred bucks.”

Several thoughts race through Emma’s head. The first, unhelpfully, is two HUNDRED dollars for one bottle of pills? Shortly followed by If I run, will he grab me?

Sensing the direction of her thoughts, the boy huffs. “I don’t like having to hurt people, really.” But he would, hung unspoken in the air.

“Leave her alone, Darren.” The voice is unfamiliar, low, with a rasp to it.

Emma whirls around to the girl stalking toward them. She’s...dangerous looking, leather jacket slung around her broad shoulders, green eyes boring unwaveringly into the aggressive pill-pusher.

The boy - Darren - backs up quickly. “N-Noelle? I didn’t know you were back in town. I’m just trying to run a business, okay?”

Noelle doesn’t speak, just wrenches the bag out of Darren’s hands and flings it onto the roof.

“You bitch!” Darren hesitates, glaring, then turns tail and runs.

The other girl watches him go, the ghost of a smirk on her lips. Up close, she’s taller than Emma, but only just.

It’s like the bubble of nervous energy inside her just bursts, and Emma blurts out, “W-wow, that was...kind of amazing -uh, amazingly stupid!”

Noelle hums, glancing at her. Emma doesn’t miss the way her eyes drift down to her stomach and back. “You gotta fight like with like.”

Emma laughs, a tittering little sound that she hates. She bites her lip, hard. “You’re lucky it didn’t come to a fight.”

The other girl shrugs, unbothered. “I like my chances better than yours.”

Okay...fair.

Noelle sighs, swiping a hand through her bangs to push them out of her chiseled face. “You should get out of here. I can’t spend all day playing guardian angel.”

“Oh.” The comment rubs her the wrong way, but Emma brushes it off. After all, she did call the girl’s heroics stupid. Maybe...maybe there’s a way to make it up to her? “Unless…you’re new, right? Maybe I can repay the favor and show you around?”

Noelle raises a brow. “How do you know I’m new?”

Not an outright rejection, Emma can work with that. She smiles. “I happen to know pretty much everyone here.”

“Don’t be so sure.”

“So you’ve been invisible the past four years? I would definitely have remembered you.” The last part comes out without her even thinking it.

Green eyes drop to the ground, expression shuttering off. “I’ve...been away.”

“Like on a trip?”

“Not exactly.”

Emma pauses. She honestly can’t tell what the other girl is thinking. “You...don’t seem to like answering questions.”

Noelle’s lips twist into a humorless smile. “I’m told it’s one of my best character traits.”

Emma’s heart pangs. That’s messed up. “I’m not sure who told you that. It’s...sad. It keeps people away.”

“Sometimes it’s better that way.” Her voice is flat, either matter-of-fact or defeated. Who’s to tell?

“Not always,” Emma shoots back, challenging.

Noelle studies her curiously, weighing her words. She runs her tongue over her lips, then clicks it against her teeth, coming to a decision. “Fine. So, hypothetically, let’s say I take you up on this offer. What are you gonna do? Draw me a map or something?”

Emma snorts. She’s dismal at drawing. “I’d give you a tour. The campus has changed a lot the last few years, and I know all the best new spots. Besides, I’m not letting you get away that easy.”

She means it as a joke, but - she means it as something else, too.

Noelle’s back straightens, and there’s a renewed interest in her gaze. She gives her an easy grin. “I like the sound of that. Alright, I’m in.”

Something in Emma’s chest swoops. She can’t help but beam. “Welcome to Eastridge High tour extraordinaire.”

She takes the other girl around the school, pointing out landmarks important and trivial. Noelle opens up, not by much, but enough that Emma gets a glimpse of who she is underneath all the stoic backtalk. Intuitive, dry humor in spades, and…

And maybe...very, very attractive.

Emma’s only ever really had a crush on Ava, so she’s not totally sure what her type is, but damn. Apparently badasses check a lot of her boxes.

They wind up at the greenhouse, bequeathed by wealthy alum’s generous donation. It’s dubbed the Garden of Truth, the legend going that questions asked near the fountain in the center must be answered truthfully, with a magical limit of one a day.

Noelle chuckles, like legitimately chuckles. “You have to be making that up. Right?”

Emma tuts, kneeling to dip her fingers in the fountain’s water. “One question only, so choose wisely.”

Noelle looks up at all the hanging plants, the vines climbing towards the ceiling. “You first.”

Are you into girls?

“Have you ever been in love?” Close enough, right?

Noelle stiffens. “No,” she says, sharply, then reconsiders. “Maybe. I had feelings for someone I- someone I shouldn’t have.”

No pronouns. No closer to an answer for that, then. There’s silence for a moment, Emma tracing patterns on the water’s surface.

“You looked upset when you showed up at the parking lot today. Why?”

Emma jumps, drenching her sleeve. She stands. “I wasn’t - ”

Noelle sends her a look. “We’re in the Garden of Truth, remember? Be honest.”

Emma takes a deep breath. It might be nice to tell someone, someone with no stake in the fight. “I found out the girl I like is dating my best friend.” She wraps her arms around herself, holding Noelle’s gaze. “N-no one knows that I’m… Don’t tell anyone.” Her voice actually quivers.

Noelle reaches out and puts a hand on Emma’s arm. “I won’t. I’m good at keeping secrets.” She takes her hand back, and Emma immediately misses its warmth. “This girl… Does she know how you feel?”

Emma’s vision clouds with tears. “No.”

Noelle tilts her head, eyes crinkling in sympathy. “Figures. It’s hard to imagine someone turning you down.”

It isn’t hard for Emma - that seems to be all she has been able to imagine. The way Ava’s mouth would hang open, the way she would back away, turn her down. How it would get out, first to the cheer squad and then to the whole school. There’d be whispers, cruel jokes, pity. Everything would change.

They walk back out. Emma spots a few cheerleaders lounging around a picknick table in the courtyard. They wave her over.

Noelle slows, shoving her hands in her light-wash jeans pockets. “Looks like that’s the end of the tour. Bye for now, Cheer Squad.” She walks off before Emma can reply.

“...Bye?”

Her steps felt lighter as she joined the group. Like Noelle had lifted the weight since the Ava-Mason bombshell went off this morning. A distraction, if only for a few minutes.

Ava’s watching her with a somewhat shell-shocked expression. “Emma, I can’t believe you were talking to Noelle Harris!”

To her right, Lauren looks delighted. She twirls a lock of black hair in her manicured fingers, eyes sharp. “Don’t you know who she is?”

Emma searches the team’s faces for a hint, but she can’t find one. “What, is she famous or something?” It’s meant to be sarcastic, but she’s so confused it comes of as genuine.

Toni clears a spot for her, patting the bench. “You’d better sit down. You need to hear the truth about her!”

Taking trepidatious steps, Emma has the sinking feeling she’s gotten herself further into a mess.

[bangtan-sonyeonddaeng]

BTS Reaction: Their normally bubbly, kind s.o roasts someone who is badmouthing them

This is literally me lol. I actually had a lot of fun writing this one!

Namjoon

You and Namjoon were walking hand in hand down the street on the way back to your apartment. You were coming back from your date and yes, you looked damn good if you say so yourself. You were wearing a low cut shirt and tight jeans that hugged you in all the right places. You walked past a group of guys when one of them decided to make an offhand comment towards you. You almost barely heard him but sure enough, your ears heard the word “Slut” come out of his mouth. You felt Namjoon immediately tense up next to you and he was more than ready to defend you, however when he turned around he saw you grabbing the man by the collar and already defending yourself. “Excuse me? What the fuck did you just say to me asshole?” Namjoon couldn’t believe the words that were coming out of your mouth but if he was completely honest it just made him even more attracted to you. “What I wear is of no concern to you. I dressed up nice for my boyfriend not for you. So next time you want to say something to me I’d think twice and keep that ugly mouth of yours shut unless you want me to stick my foot in your mouth and shut it for you.” You released the man and walked back to Namjoon, your bubbly smile back on your face as he just stood there and stared at you in complete shock.

Jin

Jin had warned you more than once not to read comments from the fans online but you were bored and couldn’t help yourself. Majority of the comments were nice and supported your relationship. However you did find some not so nice ones and after the 5th one you read you snapped. I just don’t understand why Jin is with someone like them. He’s world wide handsome. Y/n is not good enough for him and never will be. You let out a scoff and immediately started smashing your fingers against the keyboard. Jin could tell something had upset you so he came over to see what you were doing. “Jagi! I told you not to read those what are you doing?” “Listen Jin my parents didn’t raise no bitch I am not going to sit here and let this little hussy talk shit about me over the internet.” “Y/n. You can’t engage with people like this it is just going to add fuel to the fire.” “Jin, I love you. But let me handle this okay?” He let out a huff as he sat back and watched you typing back to this random person, not fully understanding why this bothered you so much. Listen here. You might think you are big and bad because you type this shit on the internet but I would bet my house that you wouldn’t dare say this to my face. Actually you know what? If writing hates comments makes you feel better about yourself go right ahead because guess what? At the end of the day it’s me he’s coming home to. It’s me that he is kissing passionately before we go to sleep at night. So if being mean to me makes you feel better about that fact that you will never have him go right ahead. Jin began laughing hysterically. “Damn I had no idea my sweet bubbly y/n was such a badass. I better be careful from now on behind that sweet exterior is a demon that shouldn’t be messed with.”

Yoongi

Today was one of the rare days you actually were able to convince Yoongi to go out with you and you wanted to look extra nice for him. You put on your best pair of ripped shorts, and a crop top. Yoongi’s jaw almost dropped to the floor when he saw you, he thought you looked absolutely gorgeous. As you were walking with him you noticed some guy up ahead staring at the both of you. You gripped his hand tighter feeling uncomfortable with the way he was looking at you. When you walked past him he gripped your other arm and pulled you back from him. “What’s a sexy thing like you doing with a tiny guy like that? Don’t want you want to be with a real man?” Insulting you was one thing, insulting your boyfriend was a completely different story. “Are you serious right now? Get your fucking hand off me before I cut it off you son of a bitch.” He actually let go which boosted your confidence even more. You started stalking towards him, shoving him against the wall with your hand gripping his collar. “You insult my boyfriend one more time I’m taking you into that diner over there and sticking your dick in the blender is that clear? Yoongi is more of a man than you could ever dream to be. Now fuck off.” At that Yoongi came up behind you, his hand tightly gripping your waist. “You heard them. I suggest you leave.” “You’re both crazy.” The guy said as he walked away from the both of you. Yoongi then had you pinned against the wall, his hands on either side of your head caging you in. “I had no idea my sweet little prince/ss had such a mouth on them. What else have you been hiding from me? Shall we go back home and find out?”

Hoseok

You were out with Hoseok shopping at the mall. He suddenly could feel you tense up next to him as you began approaching a group of girls that were inside the store you were planning on going in to. “Um. Actually Hobi can we go somewhere else?” “What? Why? This is your favorite store.” “Those girls used to bully me in high school. Think Mean Girls but 10x worse and 10x more petty.” “Honey you can’t be afraid of them forever. If they say something to you stand up for yourself!” You walked into the store and sure enough one of them came up to you and tried messing with you. “Oh! Y/n! I haven’t seen you in forever!” You tried to ignore her but she wouldn’t let up. “Still the same weak and timid person you’ve always been I see. Gosh you make it so easy.” You couldn’t take it anymore and you finally boiled over. “Alright I was trying to be nice and ignore you but since you still seem to be as stupid as you were in high school and can’t take a hint let me spell this out for you as simply as I can so even you can understand. Go.Away. I hated you in high school and I still hate you now. Only difference is I am not the same weak girl you new back then and I won’t hesitate to put a bitch in her place. So I suggest you take your merry band of idiots and fuck off somewhere else.” Hoseok couldn’t help himself as he started cheering for you. “YEAH! GO BABY DRAG THAT BITCH!” You grabbed his hand and dragged him out of the store. “Did I do okay Hobi?” “Good? Baby you were amazing! Who knew my sweet little angel was capable of all that! I’m so proud of you!”  

Jimin

When you and Jimin were enjoying your night out at the movies together the last thing you expected was to run into your ex. Knowing your ex you knew they were going to say something snarky to Jimin and with his short temper you knew this situation was going to be bad. As you were walking into the theater you could hear footsteps fast approaching the two of you. “So this is the guy you’re with now?” “Don’t say anything Jimin just keep walking he’s not worth our time.” “Tch. I was more than worth your time when we were together. Couldn’t keep you off of me in fact. Why don’t you quit playing games with this boy and come home with me?” At that Jimin immediately whipped around to confront him but you stopped him. You kissed him firmly on the lips. “It’s okay babe. I’ll handle my ex don’t worry.” You turned around and immediately dug you finger into his chest and were jabbing it into him as you yelled. “Okay. Let me make one thing clear. We broke up for a reason. You were an asshole, who has no idea how to treat or please another person the only thing you cared about was yourself. Couldn’t keep me off of you? Give me a break. You want to know what a real man looks like? He’s standing right here and his name is Park Jimin. Don’t forget his name. With how loud he has me screaming it I’m sure you’ll be able to hear it later.” With one final jab of your finger you sauntered off to where Jimin was and planted another kiss to his lips. “Let’s go babe.” “I don’t even want to watch the movie anymore. Why don’t we go home instead and make good on your word? I wouldn’t be able to concentrate on the movie anyway. The only thing I’m going to be thinking about is what other things you’re capable of. Such dirty things coming out of such sweet lips.”

Taehyung

You were at home with Taehyung when you started getting text messages from an unknown number calling you horrible names. You couldn’t help but frown down at your phone as you texted a response. Who the fuck is this? Unless you want these texts to continue I suggest you break up with Taehyung. I know where your apartment is and I don’t think you want me to show up there. At that you couldn’t help but laugh. “Great. Now I have some crazy sasaeng texting my number threatening me. Honestly I am not even surprised I was waiting for this day to come actually.” Taehyung would immediately come and sit next to you, concern evident on his face. “Baby? What do you mean? Is someone harassing you? I can call the company right away and they can do something about this.” You reached out your hand and ruffled his hair. “It’s okay Tae. I got this. Come closer for a second.” He moved closer to you and you pressed his lips to yours and took a photo. “Y/n what are you doing?” “Putting this crazy hoe in their place.” “Jagi! I’ve never heard you talk like that before where did my sweet little angel go?” Taehyung was fake crying into your shirt as you laughed and immediately started typing your response. You sent a message along with the photo. Nah we’re good. Thanks though! Feel free to stop by I am sure Tae would love to have a word with you. I’m sure the police would to. You do realize their company has ways of tracking your phone? They will find whoever you are and I don’t think you really want the police at your door do you? So kindly, go fuck off and bother someone else. I’m tired of crazy fans trying to interfere with our relationship and If you so much as show your face within a block of my apartment I won’t hesitate bitch. As you hit send Taehyung would pull you into his arms and chuckled softly. “Remind me to never get on your badside. You are scary when you’re mad. That babyface of yours is a lie”.

Jungkook

You went out dancing with Jungkook. It took a lot of convincing on your part but he finally gave in and agreed to go with you. He left you for not even 5 minutes to go to the bathroom and during that time everything went to shit. This random girl that you had no idea who she was just decided she was going to start shit with you. She insulted your clothes, your makeup, everything. The girl was drunk as hell and most likely had you confused with someone she knew but that didn’t stop you from roasting her ass anyway. “Listen you stupid woman. I don’t have any idea who you are or why you are starting shit with me but you need to get the fuck away from me. I don’t care if you’re drunk and sloppy as all hell you lay one hand on me or say one more word to me and I will knock you on your ass you hear me?” Jungkook had finally come up behind you and grabbed your hand to lead you out of the club pinching the bridge of his nose. “This is exactly why I hate coming to places like this. There’s always drunk and stupid people trying to start shit. You’re lucky that was a girl messing with you because if I came back to a guy harassing you I would have had a lot of explaining to do to the company.” “I’m sorry Kookie.” “It’s okay. I never would have expected you to say things like that! My innocent little y/n has turned into quite the little demon.” You playfully smacked his arm and continued to talk and laugh with him as you headed home.

[pitterpatterpot]

could you write number 57? i really just think it would be really fun to see haha

57. “Wait a second.. are you jealous?”

___

“I’m sorry, I can’t.”

Aedion blinks at Gavriel. “You can’t come to lunch? Evangeline and Lysandra will be there.”

“I would love to,” Gavriel nods towards the training area, “but I’m teaching the son of the blacksmith some self-defence. His father is worried about him and figured it wouldn’t hurt for him to learn some techniques both to calm his mind and gain a new sense of self-control.”

“Right,” Aedion nods, eyeing the young blonde male with muddy brown eyes as he toys with a staff, obviously clueless as to how to handle it. “Make sure to teach him the basics first.”

“I will,” Gavriel nods, a small smile sneaking through. “His father wants him to be a fighter, but I suspect the boy is more of a gardener.”

“A gardener?”

“He names five plants while we walked through the gardens and was captivated by everything,” Gavriel shakes his head. “I’ll give him an extra hour to explore the gardens once we’re done.”

“You’re too soft,” Aedion grins. “Have fun.”

“You too.”

~~~

“I’m sorry,” Gavriel winces. “I’m helping Marc get a handle on his knife skills.”

“Again?” Aedion places his cup down. “This is the third time you’ve skipped family lunch. And didn’t you help him with that last week?”

“Yes, but there are still weeds.”

“What?” Aedion halts his eating, looking up at his father.

Gavriel blinks back. “Pardon?”

“You said weeds?” Aedion slowly raises his brows.

“I meant weeding out his mistakes,” Gavriel clears his throat, shifting his eyes to the side.

“Right…” Aedion places his fork down. “I’m going to choose to believe that and ignore the fact that you’re obviously helping him tend to the gardens. Join us when you’re free.”

“I will,” Gavriel smiles brightly.

~~~

“Again?”

“I-”

“I mean… again?” Aedion throws his hands up. “They’re family dinners for a reason!”

“Sometimes they’re lunch,” Lysandra pipes up, reading a book in bed. “Even breakfast. It’s more of a meal out thing.”

“Yes, exactly!” Aedion scowls, gesturing to the shifter on the bed. “You, Lysandra, Evangeline and I go out for a meal of sorts and sometimes the others join us. It’s always the four, plus more. Not minus one.”

“I really am sorry,” Gavriel grips Aedion’s shoulders. “But Marc can’t ask his father to help with the garden.”

“Why not?” Aedion tries to fight back a scowl.

“He isn’t the most agreeable of men when it comes to anything besides forging or fighting,” Gavriel sighs sadly. “The boy clearly takes after his mother and she passed some years ago. He’s nervous about how his father would take the news that their interests aren’t aligned.” 

Aedion softens immeasurably, his eyes melting at the news. “Ah. Go help him with the garden then. Maybe it’ll help his father notice and he’ll take a damn interest in his son’s life.”

Gavriel nods and leaves. Aedion reaches the bed and collapses by Lysandra, shifting so his head rests in her lap. Immediately a hand reaches to toy with his hair, stroking it absentmindedly as she reads. They have a deal; with the number of times Aedion pats her when in animal (and human) form it’s only fair that he gets pats back.

“I hope Marc works out the situation with his father,” Aedion mumbles, eyes slipping closed.

“Hmmm,” Lysandra focuses on the book.

“I mean, five missed meals.”

“Uh huh.”

“And to think Gavriel used to get so upset at missing them.”

Lysandra pauses in reading for a moment, frowning down at Aedion. “Right.”

“But I guess he’s allowed to skip them now,” Aedion mumbles, eyes slipping closed at her hand’s movements. 

“Wait a second… are you jealous?” A small grin cracks out on Lysandra’s face and she places the book down.

Aedion’s eyes snap open to stare at her. “What? No!”

“You are,” Lysandra cackles, her hands tangled in Aedion’s hair. “You’re jealous that he’s spending so much time with Marc!”

“I am not!” Aedion scowls. “It’s just that he would do the whole ‘I’m not angry, just a little disappointed’ thing if I missed one of our meals out!”

“He really wouldn’t,” an amused smile dances across Lysandra’s features. “I have a feeling that you’re just a little jealous that Gavriel is spending time with a boy who is at the age where you would have loved to have a father.”

Aedion glares. Lysandra glares back.

“How many weeds can there be in that damn garden?” Aedion finally relents, letting his head drop against her thigh once again.

And that cackle sounds out. How he loves that laugh, no matter whether it sparks joy, irritation or fear. Even if that laughter is directed at him.

“I am not jealous.”

“Of course you certainly aren’t,” Lysandra grins. “You’re yearning for your dear father while steaming at the fact his attention has been stolen. Completely different situation.”

Just keep petting me.”

“Yes dear.”

~~~

An hour after the planned meeting time and Aedion has little choice but to stomp to the garden shed to retrieve Gavriel himself. 

“I swear to the gods,” Aedion growls, pinching the bridge of his nose as he stalks into the garden shed, “if you say that you’re missing another meal I am going to drag you there by your damn-”

“L-Lord Aedion?”

Shit.

“Hello, Marc,” Aedion halts, looking at the young boy sitting on a sack of soil and -

Shit.

Crying.

And the boy is doing a surprisingly good job of covering it up or at least attempting to. The way he sucks in his breath to steady it and immediately halts the flow from his eyes is impressive. Too impressive. Being the same age as Evangeline he shouldn’t be so practised in hiding his emotions.

“So,” Aedion makes a vague gesture towards the door of the shed, “I’m just going to go…”

Marc nods, yet as soon as Aedion turns around he hears a muffled sniffle and a small hitched breath. No. No, he cannot sit by and allow this. He would have killed whoever approached him when he was in such a state during Marc’s age, yet it’s apparent that Marc is a very different person. 

So Aedion strides over and sits on an empty, overturned bin. Marc almost flinches, his eyes darting away. Aedion tries to shift to the side so his sword isn’t so… visible.

“What’s wrong?” Aedion knows what level to keep his voice to, having dealt with many young children before, during and after the war.

Marc sniffles again, eyes focused on a spade in the corner. Colour is flushed high on his cheeks, his brown eyes still watering. Aedion waits, ignoring the way he chest aches. It doesn’t feel like too long ago that he was a child finding places to hide in the palace, hurtful words following him there as he grieved. 

“You’re lucky,” Marc finally mutters, “your father likes what you like.”

Oh.

Oh.

Aedion nods slowly. “He does. Marc, has something happened?”

“He saw Gavriel gardening with me,” Marc mumbles, picking at the dirt under his nails. 

Aedion waits for him continue, patient as Marc wipes quickly at his face.

“He got angry.”

Aedion waits again.

“He’s yelling at Gavriel.”

Oh, fuck no.

“He’s yelling at Gavriel?” Indignation rises in Aedion.

“For gardening with me instead of teaching me to fight,” Marc’s voice wobbles and pitches dangerously. “I don’t like fighting. And I’m not good at it and I don’t want to be.”

“You don’t need to like fighting,” Aedion kneels on one knee, frowning as he tries to look in Marc’s eyes. “You’ve been tending to the gardens and are interested in landscaping. Do you have any idea how much hard labour work that is? How much attention for detail that demands?”

“It’s not what he wants,” Marc’s hands clench in his fists.

“Fuck what he wants,” Aedion grins rakishly at the small smile that appears on Marc’s face. “It’s your life. Believe me when I say that you have choices. I know what it’s like not to have any. You have plenty. Especially if people like Gavriel are willing to help you.”

Marc nods, blinking his eyes dry. They sit in comfort together, Aedion rising to sit upon the bucket again. Scrubbing at his eyes, Marc seems much calmer than before, fiddling with his hands.

Aedion is prepared to rise, to bid Marc farewell. He is about to do so-

“Do you like males?”

Aedion sits back down, a surprised laugh erupting from him. A bright red flushes across Marc’s face and he places his head in his hands. It takes a little while for Aedion’s laughter to die down into chuckles.

“I happen to find myself attracted to both males and females,” Aedion easily throws another grin at the horrified boy. 

Somehow, Marc seems to turn even redder as he nods. “Right. Yes. Um, I might go and… try to talk to my father.”

Concern immediately swells within Aedion once again. “Would you like me to come with you?”

“No,” Marc stands and straightens his shirt. “He acts scary, but he’s really a big softie, you know?”

Aedion nearly rolls his eyes, standing as well. “Oh, trust me, I know. Don’t catch Gavriel in his lion form around me or anyone he likes unless you want to preserve the image of a badass warrior.”

“Um,” Marc ducks his head, “I already saw him yell as he pricked his finger on a thorn? So… too late?”

Another startled laugh erupts from Aedion. Marco smiles, straightening slightly as Aedion holds open the door for him.

“Talk to your father,” Aedion pats his shoulder. “Work things out. Maybe he’ll even try gardening with you.

“Right,” Marc nods, hands grasping the hem of his shirt. “You know you can come garden with Gavriel and I, right? I mean, he talks about you the whole time anyway.”

Crap. Aedion does not need that guilt after such a warm moment. Perhaps he does need to leash his jealousy.

“Noted,” Aedion nods. “You also know Evangeline right?”

“We’re friends,” Marc nods. “She’s really nice. She didn’t laugh when she saw me covered in dirt. A lot of other kids do.”

At once Aedion’s heart swells with pride and sinks with disappointment. “Of course she wouldn’t. If you need anything don’t hesitate to come to Gavriel or me.”

“Thank you, Lord Aedion.”

“Just Aedion,” he reaches out to quickly ruffle the kid’s wild mess of hair. “You go enjoy yourself, Marc.”

~~~

“So you met Aedion?” Evangeline hums, threading flowers into a crown.

“Yes,” Marc mumbles, yanking weeds from the flower beds.

“And were you scared?” Evangeline grins, throwing him a look.

“Of course!” Standing, Marc moves the weeds into a pile. “Really scared. He’s tall and has weapons. And I think I made him mad by spending so much time with Gavriel.”

“You’re fine,” Evangeline waves her hand. “As long as he doesn’t find out you used to have a pet crush on him.”

“I didn’t!” Another flush appears and Marc straightens. “I- that was- that was someone else!”

“I saw you blush!” A cackle erupts from the girl. “Trust me when I say they’ll be even more delighted at the fact you’re my friend when they all realise you have no romantic interest in me. Otherwise, they’d be insanely protective.”

“Your family terrifies me.”

“Yeah, they’re awesome.”

[recentnews18-blog]

New Post has been published on https://shovelnews.com/the-gang-confronts-me-too-in-one-of-the-most-explosively-funny-sunnys-in-years/

The Gang confronts Me Too in one of the most explosively funny Sunnys in years

Kaitlin Olson, Charlie Day, Glenn Howerton, Rob McElhenney, Danny DeVitoPhoto: Patrick McElhenney/FXX

“I feel like we should clap.”

Okay, let’s talk about one of the funniest moments in It’s Always Sunny history.

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First a word about spoilers. Hey—don’t read a review unless you’ve seen the thing that’s being reviewed. And, if you do, don’t complain about the review needing to discuss things that would have been great to see without being “spoiled” by you making the inexplicable choice to read a review before seeing the thing being reviewed.

Okay.

It’s Always Sunny In PhiladelphiaSeason 13

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So “Time’s Up For The Gang” sees Mac, Dee, Charlie, Dennis (returning after being MIA last week), and Frank attending a sexual harassment seminar because Paddy’s has been put on an internet “shitty bar list” of Philly establishments hostile to women. The intrepid and unsuspecting moderators (Marypat Farrell and Humphrey Ker), after enduring a barrage of inappropriate, profane, and otherwise point-missing interruptions, separate the Gang for some breakout sessions, perhaps thinking to dilute their charges’ obvious awfulness with a little distance.

That . . . does not work.

The male moderator, Alan, tries out a little roleplaying to address Mac and Dee’s clear lack of comprehension about appropriate workplace behavior. Asking Mac what his function is at Paddy’s elicits Mac’s traditional inflated sense of himself as the bar’s badass peacekeeping resident Swayze, although Dee and Charlie (also in the session) note that he’s just supposed to check IDs, which he doesn’t do. (Continuing the ongoing meta-jokes about Mac’s evolving—or devolving—role, Charlie muses, “He’s just, like, our gay guy now.”) Dee, being Dee, peppers the patiently befuddled Alan with questions about her motivation for playing someone going into a bar (“To get a drink?,” he suggests), settling finally and inexplicably on “revenge.” Alan, to get things rolling, says fine, and then the seemingly simple scene begins.

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Rob McElhenneyPhoto: Patrick McElhenney/FXX

Now—and just to prolong the lead-up to the gag for one more delicious moment—one might imagine that one knows where this is going. Dee and Mac are deeply into their roles here, and those roles are informed by the characters’ deep-rooted delusions about how they’re seen and who they are. Dee is a great actress. Mac is the “Sheriff of Paddy’s.” They’re both awful people. The episode, written by Megan Ganz, is about how awful people either deliberately or through societal conditioning turn any discussion of sexual harassment, consent, and rape culture into a boorish, facile intellectual shitshow. So Dee—seen entering the seminar singing a gloating “Time’s Up!” chant at the guys’ being called out in public—will (ineptly) play at being superior, while Mac will say something inappropriate under the guise of trying to score the “points” he thinks Paddy’s needs in order to get off the internet’s shit list.

Instead, Mac greets Dee’s opening line by hoisting Dee fully into the air by her vagina.

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Now, there’s a lot going on here, and all of it works to produce the biggest out-loud laugh I’ve gotten from a TV show in a long time. There’s the way in which Mac’s action echoes a phrase Donald Trump cemented into the American lexicon and elevates it (along with Dee) to shocking, absurdist heights. There’s the execution of the gag, which would have fallen flat if it didn’t look so seamlessly, impossibly actual. There’s the joke of Mac’s ridiculously buff new body, yet another physical transformation whose obvious offscreen effort on the part of Rob McElhenney is tossed off along with the Gang’s perpetual dismissal of Mac. There’s Dee’s awestruck reaction to Alan’s horrified assessment about Mac’s grab being designed to make Dee feel small, where she marvels, “It made me feel tiny, like Thumbelina!” There’s the abruptness, seizing the joke (and Dee) before we have a chance to imagine what’s coming.

Kaitlin Olson, Charlie Day, Danny DeVito, Rob McElhenney, Glenn HowertonPhoto: Patrick McElhenney/FXX

And the thing is, that’s only the first great, lunatic surprise of “Time’s Up For The Gang,” as, in yet another classic example of Dennis Reynolds’ meticulous hyper-masculine madness, it’s finally revealed that the entire exercise—involving two professional moderators, a viral awareness campaign, a Bond villain-worthy PowerPoint presentation, and dozens of Philadelphia business owners dragged to the Hyatt—is all Dennis’ doing. Throughout the episode, we see each member of the Gang but Dennis having their own particular sexual creepiness brought out into the open, leaving them each, in turn, suddenly drenched in panic-sweat. Frank (who returns from a hasty call to his lawyer in a dry, inadequately belted bathrobe) has a long history of hiring attractive women, sleeping with them, and then promoting them to shut them up. (“It’s a win-win,” he protests, “Except for the wives.”) Mac’s embrace of his long-repressed homosexuality has left him finally expressing his lust for Dennis and other men in very unwanted handsiness. Charlie’s fifteen years of stalking the Waitress is thoroughly deconstructed by Dennis, not as the actions of a “hopeless romantic” that Charlie would have it be, but as those of “a sad, pathetic wretch of a man so desperate to be loved that [he’ll] actually go rifling through somebody’s garbage.” And Dee, it’s revealed, isn’t as off the hook as her head-nodding female smugness would have her be, since Charlie explains that their one sexual encounter had enough distressing consent issues to lead him to think of it as “molestation.” (Charlie’s still in deep denial about Uncle Jack, though, The Nightman Cometh notwithstanding.)

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Charlie DayPhoto: Patrick McElhenney/FXX

Delivered with the maniacal precision of a supervillain, Dennis’ unveiling of his complex scheme is the culmination of the episode’s smartly subversive dissection of the issue at hand. I’ve said it before, but looking to Sunny for social commentary is a tricky proposition. For every feint toward flat-out pronouncements on cultural issues (gun control, abortion, racism, ableism, homophobia), It’s Always Sunny In Philadelphia is, at its tarry black heart, a character study of human weakness. The Gang forms five points of the same Vonnegut-esque cartoon anus in their various embodiments of the bottom-scraping worst in all of us. So here, while there are passing shots at mens’ rights talking points and male panic about the Me Too movement (“I don’t know if you noticed but women are on a little bit of a rampage right now and anyone could be taken down at any moment,” lectures Dennis), the episode functions most eloquently in its takedown of the base self-interest that drags man-woman interactions down to the Philly mud. We don’t need Sunny to come out and say rape culture is insidious, that men have serious issues when it comes to women, and that Mac’s idea of the cosy coolness of “locker room talk” is self-justifying misogyny, because Sunny—for all its gleeful and skillful comic scandalousness—operates on the principle that basic human decency is a good thing.

But the Gang is us at our venal, cruel, human decency-eschewing worst. So when Frank’s old school, underling-banging behavior is aired out, or when Mac perks up when female moderator Kate gives way to Alan (“Oh, here comes the boss man.”), or when Charlie’s squirmy obsessions are shown to stem from incel-style male entitlement, or when Dee gloats while ignoring her own abuse of sexual power dynamics, their sweat-soaked comeuppance indicts the “just saying what everybody’s thinking” crowd without itself breaking a sweat. (Dennis’s presentation also trots out the whole “women only report ugly harassers” argument as part of his mission to include every rape-apologist cliché.) That’s what Sunny does at its best.

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Glenn HowertonPhoto: Patrick McElhenney/FXX

As for Dennis—the Gang member most in need of this particular moral correction—the fact that he engineered the whole enterprise as part of his ongoing campaign to skirt the law while continuing to indulge his truly unsettling fetish for questionable consent play is a masterstroke worthy of the evil genius he is at such moments. When the rest of the Gang, outed by Dennis’ plan, object that Dennis has “Dennis-ed” more women than any of them, Dennis’ smug response comes wrapped in his layers of self-insulating preparation. As his culminating presentation goes on, Dennis reveals that he—unlike the rest of the Gang—keeps his life “tight,” complete with congratulatory and legally binding exonerating texts from his conquests. “Their phones did,” responds Dennis to objections that no woman would write a sexual partner that “I am saying YES to everything that happened last night,” Glenn Howerton expertly switching off whatever light exists behind Dennis Reynolds’ eyes. When Kate, informed that her well-intentioned expertise was merely a part of Dennis’ ploy to preemptively solidify alibis for his life of deception and abuse, shouts “You’re a monster,” Dennis Reynolds, tossing the PowerPoint remote aside in triumph, fixes her with a snakelike gaze and says, “Prove it.” It’s chilling, it’s masterful, and, as Charlie—anticipating the response of those all too willing to latch onto any powerful man’s excuses for accusations of sexual misconduct—puts it, “I gotta be honest, I didn’t follow most of it, but so cool, man.”

Stray observations

Frank to his lawyer, after his robe pops open in front of Kate: “How soon can you get to the Hyatt? My dong fell out.”

Mac defends his obsession with scoring points, rebutting, “Everything is graded by points, otherwise, how did the Eagles win the Super Bowl?”

Dennis’ intimate knowledge of pending statute of limitations laws and legal definitions of consent and harassment (he even knows who Carmita Wood is) recall nothing so much as how the manager of Alec Baldwin’s jailbait-chasing movie star in State And Main keeps a copy of statutory rape precedent in his car.

Another huge director-crafted laugh: After Alan rightly defines what Mac just did as actual sexual assault, Mac looks to Charlie for backup, only to see Charlie’s empty seat and the closing conference room door. Well done, Kat Coiro.

Dee uses Me Too paranoia to clear all of the men out of the buffet line.

Illustrating his “ugly men don’t get accused of harassment” point, Dennis flashes a picture of Cricket, punctuating the truly horrifying evidence of the Gang’s decades of abuse on the poor guy’s face by assuring his audience, “He was born this way.”

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Source: https://tv.avclub.com/the-gang-confronts-me-too-in-one-of-the-most-explosivel-1829270618