#unfortunately i have to go back to hell (my old job) in like five mins 😔

[vampcubus]

y’all i’m so happy rn. one of my two new jobs ended up being so nice, and i actually love it there 😩 i get to make smoothies all day

[sxvxrxssnape]

Snolidays/Snapemas Day 3+4

Gift Shopping & Ornaments & Smile & Snow // pre-PS/the years between. Minerva and Severus friendship aka Minerva McGonagall’s personal mission to make Severus love Christmas part 3 aka min and sev’s shopping adventures: diagon alley edition ft. emotional disaster sev 

“Don’t forget, final essays are due next week!” Severus reminded his classroom of sixth year students as they cleaned up their work tables. “You’ve had three weeks to write them and I expect them all to be turned in.” He attempted to glare at the class, but no one paid him any mind.

Students exited his classroom in small groups of two and three, huddled together and laughing over meaningless jokes and plans for the afternoon. 

“Hold up, this classroom is still a mess! You’re NEWT students, for Merlin’s sake, you should know better than to leave things like this!” He tried to call them back, but he was speaking to an empty classroom.

He sighed. 

Being a professor at twenty-five was a fucking joke when no one took him seriously enough to respect him as an authority figure. It happened primarily with the older students, but even some of the other professors treated him as if he were still a student. Minerva seemed to be the only one who really saw him as a colleague and even she had her moments. 

What was he supposed to do? Practice making scary faces in the mirror until he perfected the disappointed eyebrow raise and scowl? Assign more detentions? He’d thought dressing the part would make him look more authoritative, but now he wondered if he simply looked like a child playing dress-up when he walked around in the stupid teaching robes Narcissa Malfoy had helped him purchase.

Another sigh, but this one was shaky. 

He surveyed the room and got to work, shutting drawers and cabinet doors. He double-checked the supply closet before locking it and levitated the abandoned cauldrons to the wash basin with the others, where they would wait for whichever unfortunate student had managed to get a detention from him that day. Idly, he wondered if he should ask Argus to monitor the night’s detention or if they would return in time.

He shook his head; he was running late. 

Locking his classroom, he hurried into his office and shrugged out of his ridiculous teaching robes. They were nice and he loved the black stitch detailing, but he felt out of place when he wore them. He felt like, well, like a swot. He had other robes as well, namely faded grey work robes that he wore when he brewed potions for the infirmary, but they didn’t make him feel powerful or deserving of respect. These did, at least, so pretentious purple teaching robes it was. 

He hung them up and took in the small room that had become his safe haven between classes over the years. It was a bit off a mess, but aside from his personal quarters, this was the only other place in the castle that really belonged to him. It was his space, from the still-steaming teacup of darjeeling - courtesy of a modified warming charm - waiting on his desk to the old copies of The Potioneer’s Journal stacked on the floor. There were four different books on his desk, two splayed out, hidden underneath a pile of assignments that still needed to be graded and about two dozen more scattered throughout the stone room. 

He considered tidying up a little before he left, maybe watering his rather sad looking peppermint plant and organizing the scrolls of parchment.�� The mantle and bookshelf looked as if it needed a good dusting as well. This office was an extension of himself, was it not? 

Minerva was waiting for him, he reminded himself.

But what if a student came calling, hoping for assistance? For Merlin’s sake, he was the head of Slytherin (and how the bloody hell that happened, he still had no idea), he couldn’t just leave and traipse around the wizarding world as if he had no other responsibilities! What if something happened to one of his snakes and they needed him? He had a job! What part of in loco parentis was he not - 

He was stalling.

He was absolutely stalling. 

(And it had nothing with his position and everything to do with going to Diagon Alley). 

He forced himself to take a deep breath. His Slytherins would be fine and even if something happened, they still wouldn’t come to him for help because he still looked like a seventh year - and a socially uncomfortable, paranoia-fueled mess of one, at that. Merlin give him strength if the day ever came where he actually needed to take charge. 

At least he hadn’t stuttered anymore after his very first class. That had been a right disaster and he hated that the second years who got to experience that moment would still be attending Hogwarts for another bloody year. 

It took a few more deep breaths before he could convince himself to leave. He glanced down, decided that the black trousers and black jumper he’d pulled on from the pile of clothing that resided on his bedroom floor were clean enough for public wear, and grabbed his scarf. It was hand knitted and pale blue and alright a little wonky, but one of his snakes had given it to him and maybe he was a little sentimental over the physical proof that some of them liked him. 

He summoned his winter cloak (and he had to rummage around his desk for the silver cloak pin he might have used to stab through a particularly abysmal homework assignment) and the dragonhide satchel he knew some of the students found him hilarious for carrying around, but what was he supposed to use? His robe pockets? Then it would be obvious he was casting unsanctioned extension charms on his things. 

Definitely running late now, he headed upstairs and ran into Minerva on the stairs, who’d clearly been en route to retrieve him. 

“Well, it’s about time.” she huffed. “I wouldn’t be surprised if it was dark out already.” The words didn’t match her tone - gentle, and maybe a little concerned - and it turned his anxiety brittle. He didn’t need to be coddled. 

“I was talking to a student.” he lied smoothly, adjusting his cloak so it felt more secure - made him feel more secure - and opened the front door. 

“How was your class?”she asked mildly, as they stepped over the remnants of dirty, half-melted snow and made their way to the wrought iron gate. 

He scowled and stared up at the sky, noting how overcast it was. “Frustrating.” he admitted, because Minerva was the only person he would ever admit that to. “It’s hard to believe they’re sixth years, for all they pay attention and listen to me.” 

“They’re probably just excited for the coming break.” 

“The first years are excited for the break and they behave far better than my NEWT students.” Severus’ scowl deepened. “I hate their class.”

“Just their class?” Minerva asked, glancing at him with a raised eyebrow. 

He took a moment to contemplate that. “No, but theirs especially.” he decided. “The fourth years and under take me seriously, but the others - I’ve got seventh year Slytherins who will go to you before they come to me!”

“So the ones who’ve only known you to be their professor?”

Severus stopped. “You have a point.”

“Look at it this way,” Minerva smirked, “just three more years and they’ll all take you seriously. Besides, you are young. I’m sure you still have a little more growing to do, dear.”

“Don’t make me hex you.”

“You’ll lose.” Minerva replied simply. 

They apparated directly into Diagon Alley once they cleared the wards, appearing in the courtyard between Gringotts and The Leaky Cauldron. Daylight was beginning to dim, the late afternoon sky fading languidly into the cool tones of winter’s night, and the shopping district was quiet. 

There were only a handful of wizards walking about, making their way between the brightly colored shops and market stalls. The Alley had prepared for the holidays as well, with their decorated storefronts and the oversized Christmas tree standing tall in the center of the plaza, adorned with hundreds of ornaments and a dizzying amount of silver tinsel. There was no snow on this side of the United Kingdom though, and against the bare, wet cobblestone streets, Diagon Alley didn’t look like rows of icing-coated gingerbread houses. 

“Let’s get this over with, then.”

Minerva was watching him carefully and he offered a smile that felt more like a grimace. He didn’t hate shopping for others, but that rebellious part of him was - once again - determined to complain and make a scene. He hated that part of him, felt like he was pushing away the only person who made an effort to see him as a person and not, well, everything else he was. Traumatized child, former student, former Death Eater, child professor, take your bloody pick. 

He tried for genuine excitement, for her sake.

Their first stop was a nearby coffee stall and once again, they purchased paper cups of hot coffee with peppermint and chocolate sauce. His mood brightened when he noticed these came with whipped cream and chocolate curls. They spent nearly an hour browsing through the nearby shops and market stalls before he finally relaxed enough to stop looking over his shoulder - there was no one around but very few harried shoppers and the occasional bellringer.

They were inside of Wiseacre’s, fiddling with the selection of crystal balls and reading their futures, when Severus laughed - genuinely laughed - for the first time since they had arrived in London. 

Minerva cracked a grin at that before she schooled her face into something more severe. “Don’t laugh!” she admonished, rubbing her hands over the glass sphere. “I’m only telling you what it said: you will get everything you’ve ever wanted, through your looks and charm.”

“I’m sure you will.”

She huffed and tried a different one. “A new voyage will fill your life with untold memories.”

“Now that one sounds like a fortune cookie.”

“You try then.”

Severus shrugged and took the proffered ball. He ran his hands over the joke of a crystal ball and watched as it filled with smoke, turning warm and tingly beneath his fingertips. Tiny print appeared in a golden, curling font: “Your shoes will make you very happy today.”

He looked up and made eye contact with Minerva, exhaling the barest hint of another laugh as he thought of the puddles of slush they had walked through to leave Hogwarts and the impervious charm casted on his boots. He supposed it wasn’t too far off. 

Another crystal ball caught his eye and he reached for it. It was clearly another counterfeit, but the stand it rested on seemed genuine enough - heavy and silver-plated. Three crescent moons gather to keep the crystal ball in place, the empty spaces between them interlaced with deep blue sapphires and hand carved runes. 

He studied the runes for a moment, fairly certain they were a protection spell. “I think I’ll get this.” he announced, holding up the stand. He took the faux ball in his other hand, getting distracted when it filled with smoke and offered him another fortune: an unexpected acquaintance will resurface. 

“For Sybill?” Minerva asked, half-paying attention as she thumbed through a collection of star charts. She looked up when she didn’t receive an answer. “Severus?”

Severus was scowling down at the fortune (although it felt more like a warning) and set it down amongst the others. He didn’t put merit in fortune-telling, let alone crystal balls that sold for less than six galleons and were meant for children. “For Sybill.” he nodded, walking away from the merchandise. He absolutely wasn’t thinking about boots and his paranoia of running into old friends that increased tenfold whenever he left the castle’s wards and how fortune-telling was the only reason he’d made rank within the Death Eaters in the first place. 

The stand ended up costing him three galleons, which was more than he’d hope to spend on all of his gifts, but there’s a guilt that gnawed at him whenever he thought about Sybill Trewlaney and his time as a Death Eater at the same time; namely, how a conversation he’d had with the Dark Lord had nearly gotten her killed and it was enough to override his desire to shop frugally. 

Minerva purchased a pendant for Aurora: frail lines of silver connected to tiny stars, making up constellations that changed with the position of the planets. It was beautiful and he wished he had seen it first, but he also knew Aurora liked reading romantic murder mysteries and he could think of a few titles she’d likely enjoy.

Not that he read romantic murder mysteries.

At all. 

They left the wizarding equipment shop and continued with their browsing. The outdoor stalls were being illuminated by floating orbs now and warming charms had been cast over the next huddle of tables they approached. 

Severus was studying a display of cloak pins when Minerva called his name. 

He glanced over at her and found her holding up a box full of  ornaments - red, green, and silver baubles with gold flakes that changed color - and a tiny, but determined-looking pewter witch mounted on a broomstick that was meant to fly around the tree. 

“We’re getting these.” 

“We are?” Severus asked, moving closer to rifle through the table she had grabbed them from. He grinned as he found a box of potion phials, brightly painted and stoppered to keep the glitter water inside from spilling out. “This is entirely inaccurate.” he sniffed, but he was still smiling like an idiot because of course he was nerdy enough to find potion bottle ornaments delightful. “Amortentia is definitely not pink and if someone ever hands you a Sleeping Draught that sparkles, they need to be arrested for attempted murder.”

Minerva laughed and they paid for the three boxes of ornaments and two white-fur trimmed stockings because Min had insisted they were a decorating requirement, but that they would need to purchase two because hers matched Elphinstone’s and she wasn’t quite ready to hang it up when she knew they were meant to be a pair. 

The mood dampened a little after that admission and Severus found himself floundering. He didn’t know if he was meant to comfort her or how to even do it, so he grabbed the cloak pin he had been watching, a little bronze frog that leapt from its post and perched on your shoulder - absolutely useless as a fastener, but perfect for a distraction and invoking a smile - and claimed it was the ideal gift for Albus. 

“It even looks like a chocolate frog.” he finished, handing the vendor fifteen sickles in exchange for the now-boxed-up pin. “He’s going to love it.”

Minerva’s faint smile was soft. “He will.” 

They parted ways for the first time when they reached the bookshop. Minerva had something she wanted to get at Twilfit and Tattings and Severus waved her off, eager to finally enter Flourish and Blotts. 

“Be good.” 

He scowled at ordinance and mockingly saluted her as he headed inside. The bookstore was warm and softly lit, smelled of fresh parchment and chamomile tea. The shelves reached all the way up to the ceiling, wall-to-wall displays only broken by the burning fireplace and the collection of squishy, comfy-looking chairs gathered in front of it. 

The shopkeeper waved at him as she organized a stack of new releases next to the shelf where the school textbooks were kept. There’s a beverage cart near the fireplace, holding a teapot and an assortment of mismatched mugs. He helped himself to a spot of chamomile and started to wander around, using his wand to summon books that seemed interesting enough to add to the growing pile floating behind him. 

In the end, he decided on six books - two for Aurora, one for Argus, and three for himself. 

The newly purchased stack fit easily inside his satchel, barely taking up any room beside the crystal ball stand, the stuffed kneazle - plush toy, not taxidermy - he had found at the Magical Menagerie for Hagrid, and all the other knick-knacks he had decided on. Not to mention everything else that already resided in there.

It wasn’t technically illegal. 

Besides, it wasn’t his fault that undetectable extension charms were so advanced that not many wizards were able to do it properly. Furthermore, both Albus and Minerva were aware of it, and if anyone were to get in trouble here, his money was on the headmaster. He was confident in his spell-casting abilities and the worst that could happen was accidentally falling in and unable to find his way out - which wasn’t even that bad, considering he always carried around a medley of potions and snacks and even a blanket because he was that paranoid of being left out in the cold with no one to turn to.

He blinked.

Alright, maybe his abandonment issues were starting to make themselves known, but in his defense, Minerva had been gone for a good forty minutes now. 

The point was, casting the charm was heavily frowned upon by the Ministry, but it wasn’t going to get him arrested either. He had worse things on his resume to choose from - and thank Merlin the Ministry of Magic never found out about the...unsavory potions he had been experimenting with around the time of his trial a few years back. 

“Severus?”

He stiffened, flashes of smoke filled spheres and curling script flashing in his mind as he heard a voice that did not belong to Minerva. Tension coiled in his shoulders and he carefully secured the buckle on his satchel before he turned around and greeted the man who had decided to approach him. 

“Severus Snape.” the man grinned wolfishly, blue eyes twinkling with delight. “As I live and breathe.”

“Corban Yaxley.” Severus greeted, taking in the other’s appearance. His hair had grown out since the last time he’d seen him and his honey-colored locks were pulled back in a low ponytail, accentuating his squared jaw and arched eyebrows. “What a pleasure to run into you.”

“Quite.” Yaxley grinned, the edges sharp.  “How is Hogwarts? I heard you were made Head of House for Slytherin.” He took a step closer and leaned forward, his voice dropping as if they were conspiring next to the biographies. “An excellent opportunity to shape the minds of the future, don’t you think?”

Severus kept his face blank. “As well as one could expect,” he answered airily, as if he weren’t gripping his wand beneath the folds of his cloak tight enough to turn his knuckles white, “considering how brainless they all seem to be.” 

Yaxley chuckled and leaned back, his posture appearing relaxed and friendly now, but Severus knew better than to trust a former Death Eater who had avoided going to Azkaban simply because he was that good of a liar. 

“I don’t get paid enough to deal with their unruliness.”

“Oh, I’m sure you’ve picked up a trick or two to deal with that.” Yaxley winked and then raised an eyebrow at him. “Don’t tell me you’ve gone soft, Severus?” He stepped closer again. “You used to be so impressive.”

“All of that is irrelevant now.”

“Shame.”

The man was still smiling though and his eyes glinted with something that looked an awful lot like triumph when Severus broke and took a step backwards. He composed himself, but the fingers on his visible hand still clenched around the empty teacup he’d all but forgotten about. “How are things faring at the Ministry?” he deflected, proud when his words didn’t falter. 

“Excellent, ever since I got this promotion.” Yaxley smirked. “Karkaroff might have turned traitor - and I can’t say I blame him, for all he’s accomplished: headmaster of Durmstrang, I hear - dropping names left and right in an attempt to hightail it out of Azkaban, but he really did me a solid by getting Rookwood sacked.” 

“Glad to hear of it.” 

Yaxley stepped closer again and murmured, “Glad to hear he didn’t take you down with him, though. I heard he named you, but I was in America on Ministry business during the Death Eater trials.” Severus could feel the man’s breath on his face and it caused his facade to falter as an awful feeling crept down his spine. “I’ve missed seeing you around, Sev. You’re not hiding out in that fancy castle of yours, are you?”

Severus shook his head, unable to speak.

“Good.” Yaxley’s smile turned saccharine as he put a hand on Severus’ shoulder. 

The small bell over the door chimed as it opened, letting in a gust of cold air as someone entered, and it broke the spell. Corban Yaxley dropped his hand and headed for the door. “Don’t be a stranger, yeah?” 

Minerva was standing in front of him now, her eyes narrowed as she studied him carefully. “Alright?” she asked, and this time, Severus jumped - and for a split second, he wondered the psychology behind his body staying absolutely still some of the times he was surprised versus the times when he flinched - and pulled his cloak tighter around his shoulders. He couldn’t find the words to answer her, his mind heavily focused on the unpleasant weight he still felt on his arm, as if Yaxley were still touching him. 

“Let’s get a bite to eat.” Min led him outside and he followed as if on autopilot. “We won’t make it back to Hogwarts in time for dinner.” 

He didn’t know the time, didn’t know if she was telling the truth or not, but he also didn’t feel like returning to the bustle of students just yet, so he let her guide him through the white dusted streets of Diagon Alley. Snow had begun to fall, but he barely paid it any mind. He was still reeling, lost in his head as Minerva walked them through The Leaky Cauldron and right into muggle London. 

He flinched when she put a hand on his arm, still thinking of Yaxley’s unwelcome touch, and her lips thinned as he choked out an apology. She shook her head and gestured to his cloak before transforming her own into a cream-colored coat. He understood then and raised his wand - still gripped tightly between very numb fingers - and fumbled his way through the spell, changing his wizarding apparel into a winter coat. 

“Did you find something for everyone?” Minerva asked gently, as she led them down the street. 

He tried to think of everything he bought, frowning when he realized he’d forgotten the one person whose gift mattered the most: hers. “Just about.” he mumbled, hating the way his voice betrayed his weakness. It was no wonder his students didn’t listen; he was pathetic. How he’d ever been able to lie to the Dark Lord and not get killed was beyond him. Perhaps Yaxley had a point: he used to be so impressive. 

They entered the first open establishment they saw, a hole-in-the-wall pub with yellow paint and wooden paneling that had once seen better days, but the imperfections were overshadowed by the dozens of framed photographs that dated the place back to the fifties. The lights were hazy, casting an ambient glow onto the green vinyl seats, and soft music - jazzy Christmas songs, from the sound of it- was playing over the speakers, a strange contrast to the clinking of glasses and stifled laughter coming from the patrons at the bar. 

Minerva requested a corner booth and took the side that kept her back to the door, wordlessly yet pointedly, and Severus exhaled with a relief he didn’t wish to admit to. They were offered a laminated menu, but Min ordered the special for them without enquiring anything about it - and Severus was beginning to see a pattern there - and two pints of the house ale, and he wasn’t sure whether he was grateful or embarrassed for her help. 

“I believe I found the perfect gift for Albus.” Minerva started talking, once they were alone again, and reached into a bright pink shopping bag from Gambol and Japes, pulling out a six inch slab of what looked like granite. 

He stared at the object for a solid minute before he gave in and reached for it, taking the smooth square of white-speckled stone and examining it. It had no divots, no fault lines, no imperfections of any kind and he idly wondered if this was a very simplistic paperweight or an attempt to distract him from his impending anxiety attack. “I don’t get it.” he finally conceded. 

“It’s a puzzle box.” Minerva took it back and turned it over a few times. “Only the most advanced spellcaster could ever dream of solving it.” 

That piqued his attention and he reached for it again. “Hold on, I want to try.” He glanced around the pub before tucking his wand into the sleeve of his jumper and began casting a number of spells, starting with the most basic he could think of - it came from the joke shop, right? There was humor to be found in unexpected simplicity - and even casting a few that he definitely hadn’t learned at Hogwarts. 

He gave up, frustrated. 

Minerva, on the other hand, was grinning. “This will keep him entertained, don’t you think?” she asked, putting it away. 

“It’s going to keep me up for the rest of my life.” Severus replied. 

Their food arrived then, burgers on pretzel buns with grilled mushrooms and swiss cheese, and Severus was quick to reach for the chips. Whether it was her intention or not, the distraction had worked and now he worried that she would ask about his run-in with Corban Yaxley. Given the look on her face, it felt inevitable, so with a stifled sigh, Severus cast a whispered muffliato and a muggle repelling charm over them. 

“Just say it, then.” he mumbled.

“Say what?”

He glared at her. “I ruined our outing with my overreaction, there at the end. I can tell you’re thinking it, so don’t bother lying to me.”

Minerva blinked and reached for her ale. “Actually, I was wondering if it would be in poor taste to gift Hagrid with a cookbook.”

“What?”

“Surely you’ve tried his rock cakes?” Min asked, biting into a chip. “I just feel he could benefit from a proper recipe. I’m sure he would be an excellent baker, if he just measured the flour correctly.”

He took the out for what it was. “You’d need to find a big enough copy of The Joy of Baking.”

They were nearly done with their meal, their glasses long empty - downsides to the repelling charm, he supposed - when Minerva asked quietly, “Are you alright?”

He nodded. 

“Had fun?”

Again, he nodded, because he did have a good time. His chance encounter at the end hadn’t even gone badly - he always worried what would happen if he ran into an ex-Death Eater in public, worried he would choose his words wrong and give himself away. The Dark Lord might be gone, but his cover needed to remain intact, Merlin forbid, the worst ever happened. He just wished he had kept it together better. 

He had to learn to keep it together better.

Minerva didn’t pry any further. He cancelled the spells while she talked about Filius’ plan to form a carolling group separate from the Frog Choir and then glared at her when she mentioned it was open to the staff as well, because he could tell where that conversation was going. They were interrupted by their server - small mercies - with their bill, and Severus rifled through his satchel for the muggle money he always carried. 

They were standing just outside the door, shrugging back into their coats, when his attention was caught by a colorful flyer for a christmas lights festival. 

“We should go.” he told Minerva and bit back a smirk at her surprise that he was suggesting an activity for them to do, instead of her. 

“Really?”

“I recall you mentioning it was something you did with Elphinstone.” Severus kept his voice casual, shrugging the weight of what he was offering away. “I think we should go. This weekend.”

Minerva was still staring at the flyer, but when she finally replied, her voice was warm. “This weekend, then.”

-- a/n: maybe i got carried away again?? where’s the actual plot?? there isn’t one baby!! just 4.7k of general chaos

[shadowofmytime]

>> some of my absolute favorites ! like and reblog if you save and enjoy ! happy reading and give some kudos to these amazing writers ! always feel free to send me some of your favorites ! ! <<

>> There is a bit so for your convenience they are in alphabetical order ! The ‘s’s are some of my all-time favorites ! ! <<

>> min yoongi x park jimin <<

All the seasons of your love - 5k+ [college au]

The movement in the library was still slow in the first week, so Yoongi could easily remember the few people who came by. That's why he pays so much attention to a certain dark-haired freshman who walks in on a Wednesday afternoon - or at least that's what he tells himself. He goes over to the front counter and asks Yoongi for directions to the Economy 101 session and, God, his voice is as sweet as his eye-smile.

Or how librarian Yoongi fell head over heels for cute freshman Park Jimin who, unfortunately, was very much straight - or so Yoongi thought.

Bon Voyage - 47.9+ [tourist! au]

Yoongi was meant to be taking the trip of a lifetime with his boyfriend. But now he's in Paris, alone and miserable. That is until he collides - quite literally - with one Park Jimin.

Boys who talk shit - 26k+ [college au]

When Yoongi enrolled in BTS (aka Boys who Talk Shit) Boarding School, he wasn't really expecting to be the only 'straight' (to be read sarcastically) guy in a room of seven geniuses (aka children aged five to ten, honestly). Plus four pet spiders. Yes, plural.

Chaotic episodes in A Place of Love and War, where Yoongi learns all about True Love via Park Jimin, Music and Marriage. Sort of. Brain bleach and earplugs are strongly recommended.

Conflicting arrangement - 162k+ [fake boyfriend au]

"Absolutely not," Yoongi deadpanned. "Namjoon-ah. I value you as a friend, and I think I'd even go as far as to say that you're my best friend, but absolutely fucking not."

"You owe me," Namjoon pleaded. "Come on, Yoongi, it's not a big deal."

"Your boyfriend's best friend's best friend needs a fake boyfriend to come out to his family this Chuseok, all the way in fucking Busan," Yoongi repeated drily without pause, making Namjoon wince. He flipped a page of his textbook, picking up his highlighter. "Not a big deal, Namjoon. Amazing."

Cotton Candy - 240k [high school rock band]

"He could get used to sitting next to Yoongi like this. To have him around. To have the band around. To smile and feel happy. To see Yoongi sitting in front of an instrument and having him play just for him.

'If this was my happy ending,' Jimin thinks, resisting the urge to lean his head on Yoongi's shoulder, 'if I wasn't who I am, I'd just let you have me whenever you want. You could have me anytime.'"

As spring turns into summer, school band Cotton Candy unexpectedly loses its singer and the members are forced to look for a new vocalist. Six boys find one in the form of the promiscuous pink-haired boy Park Jimin who makes a home in their hearts and finally finds a place he belongs

Daegu drift - 53k+ [motorcyclist / playboy au]

Jimin stops in Daegu for a big motor show and gets caught up with the locals. Specifically one Min Yoongi.

Sneak Peek:

Yoongi has his arms folded as he stares Jimin down.

“Are you going to join the rally, or not?”

Jimin takes his time answering because he likes the way Yoongi is looking at him. “Sure. I guess it could be fun. But you do realize none of you have a chance against a Bugatti, right?”

“It’s not the car that wins the race,” the other man says. “It’s the driver. You could have the fastest, best-equipped car in the goddamn universe, but if you’re a shit driver, it doesn’t make a difference.”

Goodbye from lonely - 65k+ [uncle yoongi!]

Park Jimin works two jobs that he loves and is going to college to get his teaching degree.

Min Yoongi is a personal assistant who hates his job and spits in his boss' coffee every day.

Kim Taehyung has been infatuated with his clueless co-worker for the better part of a year.

Jeon Jeongguk has a three-year-old daughter that he'd do anything for.

Somehow the tiny human brings them all together.

Or

Tae is in love with Kookie -> Kookie's daughter takes Jimin's ballet class -> Yoongi is Kookie's stepbrother -> Jimin and Yoongi meet because of Kookie's daughter.

In your eyes (it’s where I wanna be) - 5.5k [coffee shop! au]

Jimin pauses with his marker inches away from the cup, because — is he really going to do this? Isn’t it a bit old-fashioned to write something flirty on a coffee cup? But no matter what his churning gut says about the danger and what the hell are you doing do you want to die, this guy is — with no better way to put it — totally Jimin’s Type with a capital T.

(Or: Jimin accidentally starts a nickname war with the cute blonde who likes his coffee way too bitter.)

Inked flowers - 6.4k [tattoo artist / florist au]

Something stopped him. A sound of a piano. He looked around and saw a light coming from the window on the other side of the street. On the third floor was an open window. A light and the sorrowful sound of a piano flew out of the room. Jimin looked closer and saw a figure or at least a top of someone's head.

The melody was so sad and sorrowful that Jimin wanted to cry. He started thinking, what could possibly go inside that person’s head? What were they thinking? Jimin just hoped that they weren’t sad and alone.

(let me see you) get high then low - 4k+ [photographer/model au]

"The light-haired model is the kind that fascinates Yoongi, and at the same time, he prefers to steer away from. He's all smiles and flowers, drawing you in with his cuteness until he's not anymore. Suddenly, he’s something else entirely; he's that false calm, the ocean that looks smooth on the surface but will drag you down to its depths if you dare to touch it."

or

Min Yoongi works in a photography studio with some (very questionable) friends that can't get any work properly done without making a bit of a fuss.

Park Jimin is a model handcuffed against his will and bored. Also a little bit horny, maybe.

Math Tutor - 11.7k [bad boy! yoongi]

Min Yoongi is the school's resident Bad Boy™. He's covered in tattoos, is pierced, curses like a sailor, smokes like crazy, doesn't give a shit about anything, possesses a hot temper that has people steering clear of him, and is desperately in love with Park Jimin, the adorable math nerd. When Jimin is tasked with tutoring Yoongi in math, who is in danger of failing the class and being held back a year, both boys are hesitant. Yoongi because he can't think straight around the boy with startling red hair, and Jimin because Yoongi is scary as hell and looks like he can easily kill someone. Gradually, though, the two grow closer, and Jimin finds that Yoongi is nothing like how he'd imagined.

Maybe I hate you can be our always - 35.9k [enemies to lovers]

When Yoongi thinks about it, really gives it genuine thought, it's possible that Park Jimin isn't the worst person in the world.

//

(Or, Yoongi and Jimin get off on the wrong foot.)

Ode to yoonmin - 4k+ [texting]

yoongi and jimin are in very much in love but they're the only ones who don't know it

OR

chat fic with a bunch of bad jokes and memes ¯\_(ツ)_/

Out of my system - 101.6k+ [one night stand]

Yoongi likes one night stands and he understands how they work. What he doesn’t understand, however, is how he ended up in bed with a probably-not-legal kid crying in his arms about his broken heart, because he’s pretty sure (and correct him if he’s wrong) that a babysitting job was not what he was looking for when he went to the opening of his friend’s new club

Standing on the brink of 376 - 42.9k+ [street racing]

When Taehyung woke him up at three AM to go to a street race—an illegal one, no less—claiming it would help his social anxiety, Jimin never actually expected it to do much for him, except maybe make him cry hysterically. He found that he really wasn't too far off-kilter with that assumption, but it was only after he'd suffered through countless bouts of insecurity that he realized, hidden behind each stuttered breath, every inevitable tear, every spark of unavoidable fear, and even the customary cloud of cigarette smoke itself, lay a tremendous amount of affection for a certain platinum haired street racer that he can't even begin to justify. But when his opinion of fact, fate, and even life itself continues to blur with each push of the gas pedal, he thinks he just might be able to forgive himself for falling in love with a criminal, when the nonsensical moonshine of the present mutes the anxiety that had been a constant within his heart up until this November.

Strawberry lube - 82.7k+ [college au]

Yoongi remembers little to nothing of their crazy drunken night out. But of two things he's absolutely sure, one: he's not gay, two: he just slept with Park Jimin

The Paradiso Lounge - 192k+ [photographer/stripper au]

“Do I have to pay you for that service?”

This isn’t a dream (let me love you) - 26k+ [highschool au]

As captain of his high school’s basketball team, Min Yoongi dedicated all of his attention to his team and their games. His focus on the game never waned, not once for anything or anyone.

Well, until head cheerleader Park Jimin flashed his abs during a solo cheer and made him fuck up his shot

Trying to Behave (but you know we never learned how) - 329k+ [non-idol! au]

It's been years since Yoongi's last seen him and the younger boy is a shell of his former self in a way that makes his heart twist in his chest. And yet, after all this time and countless days of convincing himself to let him go, he's still unconditionally, head over heels in love with Park Jimin.

(Jimin and Yoongi grow up together.)

Valentino Summers - 657k+ [‘80s gangsters]

Whether or not Jimin was smuggling drugs really didn’t matter. He was hustling, and these days that was all there was to it.

Hustle and survive or struggle and die.

Y/N masterlist  << check it out !! xoxo

[strwbrryeos]

The Magic Shop (M)

SUMMARY; Your mother always told you magic came at a price. You should’ve listened. Well, at least you got revenge on that stupid shapeshifter Yoongi.

Genre : smut, angst, magic!au

Pairing : witch!Reader x shapeshifter!Yoongi

Contains : rough sex, grinding, nipple play, unprotected sex, you’re soulmates Jungkook said so, oral, hand job, creampie, enemies to lovers, major character death, lotta angst, sorry not sorry, dirty talk, praise kink, minor dom!Yoongi, finger sucking

Links removed! Please visit my blog for the master list!

Yoongi can feel the wind rushing under him; it’s almost as amazing as how free he feels. He loves this. Loves as the air bends around him, doing his bidding and keeping him afloat.

His favorite thing, however, has to be the fact that for a time, he can forget about you.

Well, that is until he lands to find you scowling at him with a very grumpy face. Terrible.

“Min Yoongi!” you screech, causing passersby to nearly jump out of their skin.

Yoongi huffs, shedding his owl form for that of a handsome, young man. So much for the freedom. “What?” he groans. “I’m here, aren’t I?” He shoves his way past you and into the store, ignoring the way your eyes burn holes into his back. Or at least, he tries to ignore it. But then he’s acutely aware of how his back hurts and oh my god is that smoke?

“Y/N!” he screams in panic, “stop it! Stop it!”  

“What? You seem―”

“Y/N!” shouts a new voice, distant and annoyed. “Stop setting your coworker on fire!”

With a dissatisfied sigh and a snap of your fingers, the flame on Yoongi’s back disappears, though the new scorch marks on his shirt aren’t much better. “Really?” he asks, and he has half a mind to turn into a wolf right now and snap your neck. Maybe next time.

“Next time don’t be late,” you say with a simple shrug.

“Are you just mad because I bit you last time?”

“You could’ve given me rabies!”

“For the last time, Y/N, I don’t have rabies!”

“That’s exactly what a person with rabies would say.”

“You’re insufferable.”

“And I hate you.”

“Ditto.”

You and Yoongi work as you always do: in perfect tandem but complete silence. Part of the reason that the wizard you work for hasn’t fired either of you yet is because, despite how absolutely morbidly you get along, you work fine as long as you don’t talk. The wizard likes it that way anyway.

He hired the both of you about two years ago; you, for your wonderful knack for magic and Yoongi for his healing abilities as a shapeshifter. The perfect duo to run an all-needs magic shop.

It’s too bad you hate each other, though.

The wizard, Seokjin, comes down from his lot, shaking his head at the two of you as he watches you work. “Still nothing, huh?” he asks with a laugh. “You’d think you’d get along better after so much time together.”

“Maybe we would if she weren’t such a―”

“I will literally give you fleas,” you cut him off, causing Seokjin to roll his eyes in exasperation.

“You know, part of what makes a good magician is being able to work with other people,” he says as he begins shuffling through the day’s schedule. “It’s important, especially if you’re gonna be a healer.”

“I have good people skills,” Yoongi huffs. “It’s this one who doesn’t.”

“It’s only when I’m around you,” you reply without so much as looking up from your pot. You turn to Seokjin, changing the subject. “I brewed the first potion of the day already,” you say, gesturing to your work. “The customer will be here to pick it up in about twenty minutes. I can get working on the next one if you want.”

Seokjin nods in approval. “Good work. Looks perfect. But I think I’ll do the next. You get started on the three o’clock appointment.”

“Sure thing.”

“And Yoongi,” he says, turning his attention to the man as he fiddles with his burnt shirt, “I’m pretty sure there’s a unicorn coming in later. Take care of that, would you?”

“You got it, Boss.”

Seokjin throws him a thumbs up, fixing his shirt in the process, before giving a few final instructions and vanishing into the air. You return to your work in silence, humming what is, to Yoongi’s ears, incoherent gibberish. It makes his ears ring, though magic spells always seem to have that kind of effect on his much-too-sensitive senses. Your hands wave in a defined yet random way over the cauldron until it turns the perfect shade of glass blue. Despite the annoyed rumbling deep in his chest that comes from being near you, Yoongi can’t help deny that you always look your best when you’re working. Maybe it’s because you’re not talking either.

Where you deal with the potions and the spells and magic items (seriously, why do talking cloaks even exist?), Yoongi specializes in magical nature, whether it be plants or animals or that really weird growth on a person’s skin that they swear is whispering stupid pick-up lines to them when they’re trying to fall asleep. He pokes around the greenhouse, checking in on his new batch of nightshade and making sure to give the silver orchids extra water. He whistles while he works, and a few of the live-in fairies come to pay him a visit from their gardens.

“How are you, Yoongi?” asks one delicately, fluttering in front of his face.

He smiles at the creature, her wings sparkling in the sunlight but so paper-thin that they’re nearly invisible, and says, “Better now that you’re here,” and the little fairy zips away in shyness. Another fairy appears, opting to sit on Yoongi’s shoulder as the shapeshifter makes his way towards the back of the greenhouse.

“How’s your coworker?” he asks.

Yoongi grunts in response, the thing in his chest growling in annoyance. “Always the worst.”

“Eh, I like her.”

“Still don’t understand why.”

“She’s cool! You should get to know her. I think you guys would make good friends.”

The other fair reappears, taking her place on Yoongi’s opposite shoulder. “Doubt it! Yoongi is nice! Y/N is not!”

“Oh, you’re just biased ‘cause he paid you a nice compliment!”

“I can pay you a compliment too, if you’d like, Novus,” Yoongi says with a soft laugh, and the small creature is blushing, angry at having been so easily charmed.

“Whatever,” the fairy scoffs. “Y/N is a good witch. You’re just angry.”

“And you’re not?” cries his female counterpart. “I don’t understand why you defend her. She doesn’t even come in here.”

“That’s cause this big ol’ shifter here won’t let her. How do you think she gets her spell ingredients?”

Yoongi jumps a little in realization. “So you’re the one that’s been taking from my supplies!”

“It’s not taking if it’s from my own home!”

“I guess,” chuckles Yoongi, really not caring but glad to have solved that mystery. “We’re not gonna be friends, though, Novus.”

“I think you two have more in common than you think?”

“Like what?”

“Well―”

“They don’t have anything!”

“Stay out of this, West!” The grouchy fairy continues. “You’re both here to help people, for starters.”

“So we have one career interest. Doesn’t make her more appealing.”

“I know you both like music.”

“Everybody likes music!”

“And you’re magical.”

“Everybody is magical, Novus!” laughs an exasperated Yoongi. “Look, let me just go water the shrooms and then I’ll leave you two alone, okay?”

“No, no, please take West with you. She never shuts up about you.”

“Novus!” West exclaimes, embarrassed and scandalized. “Be quiet.”

Yoongi only shakes his head, ignoring the bickering fairies that stay perched on his shoulders. A few gnomes come to greet him, but they’re quick to leave, annoyed by the chattering of the winged creatures. After Yoongi attends to the shrooms (during which the damned things wouldn’t shut up about how he and you were destined for life, claiming they could see into his soul), he retreats from the greenhouse and back into the real world.

He finds you in the shop, busily attending five different customers, and he already knows he’s going to get hell for this as soon as they’re done. “Hello, how can I help you?” he asks, rushing down the wooden steps. The customer glares at you before returning a friendly grin to Yoongi.

“Finally some service around here! I need to pick up an order. Heat suppressants for a young hybrid.”

“Sure thing,” Yoongi says, moving to the counter. “Name?”

“Lee Daesong.”

“Got it.”

Yoongi turns around, shuffling through the wooden cabinets behind him. He pulls out a small sack where the name “Lee Daesong” is printed in fine, gold ink. Yoongi hands it the man and he returns a smile and a handful of gold pieces.

“Thanks. Have a good day.”

“You too. Come back soon.”

Yoongi watches as you help an old witch with a spell before escorting her out of the shop, and you close the door with an exasperated sigh, whipping around to face your co-worker. He’s expecting you to yell, but instead he’s greeted with cold silence. You seethe instead, sitting down at your workstation and ignoring him entirely.

He rolls his eyes in annoyance. “Not even gonna talk to me now?”

“I have nothing to say.”

“Y/N,” the shifter whines, standing in front of your desk. “For fucks sake, we work together!”

“Unfortunately.”

“C’mon, really?”

You look up, staring him in the eye as your finger flicks the air, turning the pages of the book for you. “You left me to deal with five angry customers all on my own, and Seokjin is probably gonna hear about it and have my head!”

“Look, I’ll vouch, okay? My fault.”

“Yeah,” you scoff, “as if. We all know he loves you.”

“Loves me? You’re his prodigy student!” Yoongi exclaims, and he can feel his blood beginning to heat up.

You stand up, glaring at him. “Whatever. Just make sure it doesn’t happen again.”

“Yeah. Whatever,” Yoongi retorts before stomping off. You hear the distinct slam of the greenhouse door, and you sit back down in a huff.

It’s not like Yoongi is a bad person. He’s a great person. Hell, he’s perfect. And maybe that’s what pissed you off so much about him.

You liked him when you first met him. You might’ve even harbored a small crush on him. But after years of being groomed as the “prodigy student,” the girl destined for greatness, it irked you to find someone so good at magic―and so easily praised by your idol. Working for the Wizard Seokjin is a dream come true, but he never seems to have time for you. He might give you a passive nod after a potion well-done, but all Yoongi needs to do is smile at him and all of a sudden he’s getting cakes and cookies and a new plant to take care of.

Quite simply, you hated that. So you hated him.

The only good thing that came out of meeting Yoongi was the fact that you push yourself to be the best you can be every single day. You practice your magic into long, dark hours, ignoring the pulse of your head after so many spells. Magic flows from your fingers with incredible ease, and everywhere but the shop, at least, you are praised for it. At least something was worth it.

As the sun finally set to reveal a shimmering night sky, Yoongi flips the shop’s sign to “closed,” and you both begin packing up for the evening. Seokjin returns, his arms stuffed to the brim of all kinds of wacky looking plants and contraptions. Yoongi rushes to help him, ending up with a hoard of stuff that piled high and obscured his vision.

You crack a smile until Yoongi says, “I can feel your happiness. Stop it.”

Seokjin sets down his bags before taking the load off, one by one, and ratting off each thing’s use. “This one,” he says, holding up a clear jar with red fluid sloshing around in it, “is siren’s blood. Straight from the Seventh Sea. Pretty isn’t it? See the way it glitters?”

“Gross,” Yoongi says, his nose scrunching in distaste. “I can smell it through the jar.”

“What’s it for?” you ask.

“Really good for curses,” Seokjin replies as he stashes it away. “It’s pretty potent stuff. Good for enemies.”

“Thanks for the tip.”

“It’s not to be used on innocent shapeshifters!” Yoongi pipes up, not liking the idea of you having access to such a thing.

“You act as if I would hurt you―”

Both Seokjin and Yoongi interrupt you with a sharp look.

“―on purpose! You didn’t let me finish!”

“The ‘innocent shapeshifter’ is right, Y/N. No curses.” Yoongi smiles triumphantly until the wizard says, “And you’re not allowed to use it to make yourself into some terrifying, super animal, okay?”

“Wait, I can do that?”

“Don’t give him ideas!” you shout.

“Enough, enough,” Seokjin says with a dismissive wave of his hands. “Gods, you two really don’t know when to cut it out, do you? No matter. I’ll see you both bright and early in the morning! Now get out. I can’t stand the sound of you two arguing.”

You and Yoongi give him a sheepish grin and utter your goodbyes before exiting the shop. The streets have a wispy, yellow glow to them, courtesy of the streetlights. You see a few pixies flying near the rooftops, dancing to a tune that you can’t hear.

“Gonna stand there the entire night?” asks Yoongi from behind you, ruining the serenity of the moment.

“Not as long as you’re here,” you reply cooly. You step away from him, turning to head home. “I’ll see you tomorrow.”

“Don’t be afraid to call in sick.”

“And make your day? Wouldn’t dream of it.”

Yoongi watches you go, shaking his head in irritation. You hear the sound of him morphing, but when you turn around, his figure is long gone. You shrug, continuing down the quiet street on your own. You pass stores and boutiques, markets and taverns before arriving at a cozy cafe on the street’s corner.

The bell on the door jingles as you push your way in, and a fluffy, two-headed puppy bounds its way up to you. You squat down in excitement, cooing and petting the dog until a shadow appear over you.

“I swear he likes you more than me. One day he’s just gonna leave with you.”

“If that’s the case I can consider my life a successful one. Hi, Taehyung.”

“Dork,” he says with a cheesy grin, pulling you into a hug. “How was work?”

“Terrible.”

“Yoongi?”

“Hate that guy.”

Taehyung rolls his eyes and laughs, walking back towards the counter, his cloak flowing behind him. “He’s a good guy,” he says as he turns on the latte machine. “I don’t know what you have against him.”

You groan. “Can everyone stop telling me he’s such a great guy? I’m over it!”

“Well, he is. Sorry.”

“Taehyungie,” you whine. “You’re supposed to be my best friend. Take my side for once!”

“As your best friend it is my legal obligation to tell you when you should shut the fuck up and make friends with the guy.”

You huff, sitting in a chair with Cosmo comfortably seated in your lap. “That’s it. Cosmo is my new best friend.”

“Fine. Yoongi is mine.”

“You wouldn’t dare!”

Taehyung shrugs, bringing back a latte for you and a juice for himself. “I’ve known him forever. He’s a good friend.”

“Better than me?”

“No,” Taehyung snorts, “you both are terrible. Always complaining about each other and never doing anything about it.”

Cosmo hops off of your lap to snuggle up next to his owner. Taehyung alternates between heads, scratching them both behind the ears.

“Oh, he talks about me?”

“Don’t let it inflate your ego. He’s just telling me about what a bad person you are. You two seriously need to think about couple’s therapy. It’s been two years.”

“Taehyung―”

“Look, Y/N, in all seriousness, I love you both. Sure, I’ve known you longer, but I’d be lying if I said Yoongi wasn’t a good friend.” He pauses to sip his drink. “But if you both are going into the same career, which is, keep in mind, healing, then you need to learn to work with people you don’t like.”

“Yeah, but Yoongi is―”

“Is a person that you’re spending a lot of time with, like it or not. Might as well make the most of the situation.”

You slump in your chair, suddenly feeling very childish. You love Taehyung, but you hate how he’s always right. He’s too damn smart. “I knew I should’ve talked to Hoseok today.”

“Really?” Taehyung laughs. “The man’s a sadist! He’d be giving you the worst advice possible.”

“Well, maybe that’s what I need.”

“Oh, fuck off, Y/N. C’mon. Try it my way first. Then, if it really, really sucks, you can go talk to the witchdoctor and see what he has to say.”

“Fine, fine. But only because I love you.”

“Mmhmm, I love you, too. Now go. Namjoon’s coming to pick me up.”

“Oh?” you say as you stand. “How’s that going?”

“Would probably go better if you weren’t here when he showed up!” he exclaims as he about shoves you out the door.

“Okay, okay, okay! Bye, Taehyung.”

“Bye, Y/N. Let me know how it goes tomorrow, okay?”

“Will do. Can I take Cosmo with me?”

“Not a chance.”

“Fucker.”

Against Taehyung’s wishes, you show up at Hoseok’s door anyway, and he greets you with a mischievous smile. “Can I do something for you, Y/N?”

“Yeah,” you laugh. “I need a curse.”

―

You take a deep breath before entering the shop, trying to swallow the last of your pride. Taehyung is right, you know it. You just need to be the bigger person.

You climb the steps, and the door opens with a soft creak. Yoongi is already there, humming quietly as he organizes his plants. There’s a fairy napping on his shoulder, but she flies out of sight as soon as she hears you.

Yoongi looks up, expecting a snide remark, but he’s pleasantly surprised when all you say is, “Good morning.”

“Good morning.”

“Do anything fun last night?” you ask as you rifle through the papers that Seokjin has left at your desk.

“I―uh, yeah. Visited some friends.”

“Cool, me too.” You sit down, your eyebrows scrunched in concentration as you take in the information before you. Most of the papers are written in Ancient Draconian, and you can’t for the life of you remember what the squiggly symbol means.

“Hey, uh,” Yoongi interrupts you, waving a hand in front of your face.

You look up in confusion, not expecting to see him standing so close. “Yeah? What?”

“Are you okay?”

“What do you mean?”

“You’re just… acting really nice, is all.”

Your cheeks flush and you look back down, averting his gaze. “I just figure that we should be nicer to each other is all.”

Yoongi chuckles and shakes his head. Taehyung. He points to the squiggly symbol on the paper. “Mix thoroughly.”

You pause, not quite registering that Min Yoongi just willingly helped you. “Oh. Thanks.”

“No problem.”

He turns around, going back to work. The fairy from before is now hiding in his hair, eyeing you suspiciously. “She’s up to something,” West whispers just loud enough for Yoongi to hear.

“Don’t be so cynical.”

The two of you are doing your own thing in silence until Seokjin pops into the shop with a loud whap. He stops immediately, watching as the two of you work peacefully. “Did someone die?”

“Nope. Just trying something new.”

Seokjin narrows his eyes, glancing feverishly between the two of you. “It’s weird. I don’t like it.”

“You don’t like us getting along?” you ask.

“What can I say? I must’ve gotten used to two years worth of unnecessary yelling.” The two of you say nothing as he begins his ascent up the stairs. Halfway up, he halts before saying, “You’re not fucking, are you?”

“W-What!”

“No!”

Seokjin puts his hands up in defense. “Sorry, sorry. Felt like I had to ask.” And with that, he disappears.

The air is thick with uncomfortable tension until someone walks in, and you both breathe in relief. It’s an attractive young man, dressed in a suit of fine, red silk and a black robe. He fiddles with his watch before turning his attention towards you.

“I’m here to pick up a potion.”

“O-Oh, yes. Sorry. Uh, name?”

“Jeon Jungkook. Can I also pick up a few ingredients while I’m here?”

“Sure. Yoongi can help you with that.”

Yoongi hops beside you, giving the visitor a gracious smile. “What are you looking for today, Sir?”

“Mm, a few things. Fairy wings, golden nightshade, black shrooms, and a couple of unicorn tears.”

“Sure,” Yoongi says with a nod. “The fairy wings and unicorn tears are here, and if you prefer, you can pick out the nightshade and shrooms yourself.”

“I would like that very much, yes.”

“Follow me then.”

Yoongi leads Jungkook to the greenhouse, and the two of them walk in silence until Jungkook says, “So how long have you and Y/N been together?”

Yoongi stops, eyes wide. “I―uh. What? We’re not… How do you know her name?”

“Oh, my bad,” Jungkook says with a small laugh. “Sometimes it’s hard to tell the future from the present.”

“What?”

“I’m a seer. Sorry if that wasn’t clear. I can see people as they are now and who they’re going to become. Trying to work on seeing people in the past, but that’s a bit tricky. Everybody’s hidden themselves away.”

“So,” Yoongi says as he leads them towards the field of nightshade, “you’re telling me that we… me and Y/N… we become a couple?”

“Should I not have said anything?”

“No I just… We hate each other.”

“Hate? Doesn’t seem like it.”

“What are you talking about? There’s not a single day that she and I have ever gotten along.”

Jungkook smiles and sticks his hands in his pockets. Yoongi thinks he looks infuriatingly calm. “She envies you. You admire her. Your ‘hate’ is just a miscommunication. Plus your souls are practically yearning to be together. I thought it was obvious.”

They stop at the nightshade garden, and Jungkook begins picking his way through them, leaving a dumbfounded Yoongi to process this information alone. “So we’re… soulmates?” Yoongi asks quietly as Jungkook picks his plant.

“Yep,” the seer says quite nonchalantly. “But beyond that it’s kind of blurry. Not sure why.”

“What are you talking about?”

“I don’t know. It’s blurry. What more do you want me to say?”

“I’m not a mage. I don’t know what ‘blurry’ means.”

“It means I can’t see. I can see images. I see you two together. But beyond that it’s all very hazy. It’s blurry.”

“Sounds like a lot of projection to me,” Yoongi replies as he leads the young seer to the shroom patch. “Did Taehyung put you up to this?”

“Oh, you know Taehyung? I love that guy! His dog is super cute too.”

“He did, didn’t he?”

Jungkook laughs again. “Certainly not. Taehyung takes orders. Doesn’t give ‘em,” he says with a smirk.

Yoongi cringes. He did not need to know that. “Here are the shrooms. The black ones are back there.”

Jungkook nods, careful not to tread on any. “Shrooms can see into your soul too, can’t they? What do they say?”

Yoongi knows the answer, but he doesn’t want to give this guy the smug satisfaction of being right. “I don’t know.”

“Hm, maybe I’m wrong then.” He steps back onto the main path and Yoongi begins to lead them back into the shop. “But I’m probably not. Thanks for the stuff. How much will that be?”

“That’s forty-six gold,” you interject from your place at the counter.

“Perfect. I’ll see you two love-birds around, yeah? Have a good day.”

You watch him exit with wide eyes before turning to Yoongi. “Uh…”

“Don’t ask. Guy’s crazy.”

―

At some point, you’re not really sure when, you realize that you don’t actually have to try to be nice to Yoongi. You can just do it. Maybe he’s not all bad.

He still irritates you, though.

“So I hear you two are getting along now, huh?” Taehyung says from across the table.

Hoseok, who had been slurping at his food noisily, stops and looks up. “Yoongi?”

“Yeah. We are. Doesn’t make him less annoying though.”

“How’s that curse going?”

“No need for your curses, Hoseok,” Taehyung replies with a shake of his head.

Hoseok shrugs. “Too late. Already done.”

Taehyung looks at the both of you in shock. “You did what?” he screams.

“Relax,” he says around a mouthful of food. “It’s nothing bad. Just take away something he loves.”

“Hoseok!”

“It’s fine. It doesn’t hurt anyone. The thing he loves most right now is an old record player.”

“Or,” Taehyung interjects, “you could, I don’t know, not.”

“Ah, you’re no fun.” He turns his attention back to you. “So tell me more about this Yoongi character. Y’all gonna fuck?”

Taehyung’s face turns at his crass statement, and you slap his arm. “We will not! He’s a friend.” The words were out of your mouth before you could think about it, and Taehyung’s face is absolutely glowing.

“He’s a friend! Oh my gods I have to go tell the whole world.”

“Please, don’t. I hate you.”

“It’s okay. You love Yoongi.”

“Wow, can’t believe she’s all grown-up. Boyfriend and everything,” Hoseok laughs.

“He’s not my boyfriend!” you shout defensively.

“Yeah, yeah. So I hear he’s a pretty powerful shapeshifter, right? Super young too.”

“Yeah,” says Taehyung. “He’s got a pretty impressive streak. And you hear the rumors about his family? They say that Min shapeshifters can become magical entities.”

“Aren’t they already magical entities themselves?”

“No, no, like demons. Angels. Unicorns. Mermaids. Dragons.”  

“What? No way. And a healer too, huh? Sounds like you two are perfect together, Y/N.”

“We’re not―”

“Oh no,” Taehyung says, “they’re soulmates.”

“Can you both please―”

“I knew it.”

“Stop it!” you bark, causing them both to stop and look at you. “Nothing is happening! He’s a friend, okay? Yes. That’s it. Now, my break is over, so I need to get back to work. I’ll talk to you guys later, okay?”

“Yeah, alright. See you.”

You shake your head, laughing to yourself as you make your way back to the shop. When the door opens, you’re afraid to find yourself suddenly pinned to the floor and face-to-face with a very mean looking wolf. Your body is frozen in panic, and for a second you forget any magic you had ever learned.

But then the wolf turns into a man, and you’re faced with one happy looking Min Yoongi. “That’s for being late,” he says as he climbs off you before extending you a hand.

You take it, and apparently Yoongi is stronger than you think because he pulls you right up, and now you’re face-to-face with his chest instead. Wow.

“Jerk,” you murmur before pulling away, the slightest tint to your cheeks.

“Aw, don’t be mad. You set my shirt on fire when I was late, remember?”

“Oh, right―”

“And then you said I had rabies.”

You cringe, preferring not to remember the more unsavory aspects of your behavior towards him. “Right. I know. I deserved that. I’m sorry.”

Yoongi laughs, his cheeks crinkling to accommodate his big smile. “Wow, I can’t believe I got an apology out of you.”

“That’s the only one you’ll ever get,” you say with a smile.

The day goes by easily; you spent most of it poured over your books. Seokjin left plenty of things for you to decrypt, most of them being lost spells. Where he acquired them you were afraid to ask.

“It’s closing time,” Yoongi says, appearing beside you. You look up, surprised to see that the world is dark beyond the shop’s windows.

“Oh. I didn’t even notice.”

“You’re too wrapped up in… what is this? Elvish?”

You giggle. “Nope. Mermaidian. Can you believe it?”

“I thought their spells were lost in the sinking of Atlantis.”

You thought so too, but apparently not. “Don’t know,” you say with a shrug. “And I’m not about to ask Seokjin. He does enough sketchy activity on his own.”

“You might have a point. C’mon. I’ll clean if you file.”

“Aw, what a gentleman.”

The cabinet complains loudly as you nudge it open, filing away the day’s receipts. Yoongi swipes up any stray dirt and waters his plants one last time. Your mind is preoccupied with the spells, though, and you’re running through the motions in your head. As soon as you’re finished, you’re back at your desk, trying to comprehend its instructions. You don’t notice Yoongi leaning on the broom, watching you intensely. The way you run your fingers through your hair, or the way your hair keeps falling out from behind your ears. The way you get a slight flush to your cheeks when you’ve made a breakthrough, or the adorable way you whisper as you talk yourself through it.

It’s when you smile to yourself and the thing in Yoongi’s chest damn near purrs that he drops the broom he’s leaning on and almost falls because, well, when did he catch feelings for you?

You perk up, alerted by the noise. “Are you okay?”

“Yeah,” he says, his voice shaking slightly. “Scared myself is all. I think I’m tired.”

You nod. “Go home.”

“Yeah. Yeah, I will. What about you?” he asks as he grabs his bag.

“I’ll close up. Goodnight, Yoongi.”

“Goodnight, Y/N.”

Yoongi departs and you throw yourself back into your work, the solitary atmosphere something of second nature to you. You read the words of the script outloud, the hand motions coming to you naturally, and glittery, golden water fills up your hands. The fairy Novus, who likes to come and watch you sometimes, gives you a cheer, and you file the spell away, moving on to the next.

This one is a bit harder, and you laugh a bit to yourself because, hey, this one is in Elvish. It takes a couple tries (and a lot of frustrated murmuring) before you’re able to get it; thorny vines erupt from shimmering green sigils on the ground, whipping around dangerously like they’re looking for an enemy to strike. You quickly reverse your actions, the sigils vanishing into thin air and taking the vines along with it.

“Old Elvish battle spell,” you say to Novus as you file it away. “Good for enemies.”

“What about this one?” He flies down to your desk, picking a spell written on burn parchment. The writing shimmers, but there’s something deeply unsettling about it. You shrug and pick it up.

“Not sure. Looks Draconian, but it’s not.”

Novus hovers over it for a second before looking up at you in realization. “Oh! It’s an old spell from the Blood Age! It’s like a combination of Draconian and Vampiric.”

“Hmm, sounds utterly terrifying.” You smile. “I’m gonna try it.”

“Do you need help reading it?”

“Yeah, do you mind?”

Novus shakes his head, sitting atop your shoulder as he helps you recite the words. When you’ve learned it fully, Novus steps back and watches the magic happen.

―

Yoongi is halfway through his flight home when he feels it. The thing in his chest growls, twists and turns and he abruptly drops in altitude, suddenly feeling very wrong. It doesn’t take him long to realize that something’s happened to you, and he’s darting back towards the shop within seconds.

There’s an eerie red light emanating from the shop when he gets there, and when he knocks on the door, he gets no answer. “Y/N?” he shouts. “It’s me. Are you okay?”

No answer. The Thing urges him forward, begging him to just kick down the damn door.

So he does.

The door opens to reveal you, eyes closed as you cry out, your feet chained down by restraints that wind up from a terrifying, red portal. Yoongi takes a step towards you before he’s pushed roughly back by a small, purple light.

“Don’t touch it!” Novus shouts. “It’s bad magic! Bad magic!”

“What? What happened? We need to get her out of there!”

“No, no, no,” the fairy cries, zipping around the shop in a panic. “Bad magic, it’s bad magic…”

Yoongi turns to you, and the Thing shouts as he watches you scream in pain, your eyes opening for a split second to land on him before closing again. He doesn’t know what to do. All he knows is that you’re hurting and something is trying to take you from him and oh, gods, why does his chest hurt so bad?

He doubles over in pain, and his head starts to feel fuzzy, like he’s falling asleep. The Thing roars, and he blacks out.

When he wakes up, he’s in his apartment. He does not remember getting there. He also does not know why you’re cradled in his arms, nor does he know why he physically can’t bring himself to let you go. But most importantly, why are the two of you on the hard-fucking-floor?

Yoongi lifts you gently and brings you into his room. He tucks you underneath the covers before tucking you under him, his arms wrapped protectively around you as he pulls you tightly to his chest. He breathes in your scent before drifting off again, his mind hazy.

―

You wake with a start, the previous night’s events rushing back to you at once. You remember Novus. You remember the language. You remember the words. You remember watching as your hands conjured a portal straight from Hell, and you watched as the Devil’s Ropes ensnared your feet, then your legs and hands. You remember a voice, a deep, ugly voice whispering your darkest fears in your ears. You remember blinding pain, coursing through your body as if in your very blood. But most important you remember Yoongi. He was there. He transformed into something terrible, something you never though capable, and he closed the portal himself.

And as everything came back to you, your body shook, and tears fell from your face. You bury your head in the pillow, afraid that when you open your eyes you would see it all again.

But when you do open your eyes again it’s to a soft-smiling Yoongi, gently rubbing the tears off your cheeks. “Don’t worry,” he says, “You’re safe with me.”

You hesitate, all of a sudden unsure of how to act, before rolling into him, body pressed right against his as you cry. He holds you close, stroking you lightly and whispering reassurances until your body stops trembling.

“Thank you,” you mumble into his chest. “Thank you for saving me.”

He leans down and kisses your head, an act that doesn’t go unnoticed by either of you. “What would I do without my favorite coworker?”

You sit up abruptly. “Work! Seokjin’s gonna kill me! I’m―”

“Come here,” he says, grabbing you by the hand and putting you back on the bed. “You’re taking a day off. I’ll tell him what happened.”

“But Yoongi―”

“Good luck trying to argue with me,” he laughs. “I’ll send Taehyung over to check on you, okay?”

You nod, sinking back down into the bed. “Okay.”

―

“I can’t believe it! He’s your prince charming!”

“Shut up, Tae. So he saved me from a demonic portal. Big deal.”

“Gods, you’re dense.”

“What are you talking about?” you groan.

“Okay, tell me, how did Yoongi know to come back for you?”

“Uh, I don’t know, lucky guess?”

“You know, as smart as you are, you can be pretty stupid.”

“Hey!”

“Shapeshifters have what can only be described as a thing in their chest, right? The source of all their powers?”

“Yeah, yeah. This is common knowledge, Tae.”

“Well the Thing is alert to danger when something they care strongly for is in trouble.”

“Okay…?”

“Holy fuck, you’re slow! He cares about you! And a hell of a lot too if his Thing thinks you’re that important.”

“What, so, it thinks I’m like his mate?”

“I mean, weird way to put it, but yeah. Pretty much.”

You lean back, your soup long forgotten. “Woah.”

“Now the question is, how do you feel about him?”

“I actually… I don’t know. I guess I’ve never thought about it.”

“Well, get thinking about it. ‘Cause the truth is out there for him at least. I know you like to hide yourself from people, Y/N,” Taehyung says, standing to clean up. “But do yourself a favor, okay? Don’t hide from him.”

Taehyung leaves you confused and irritated in Yoongi’s apartment, and there’s not much for you to do except pace back and forth impatiently.

“How do I feel about Yoongi?” you said aloud. “Hell if I know!” You flick your fingers in agitation, sparks flying from them every so often. Okay, yes, he’s good looking. Really good looking, but who’s paying attention? He’s got a heart of gold; you’ve seen it firsthand.

But that doesn’t mean you like him, right?

Sure, he can be equal parts infuriating and equal parts endearing. And, sure, the way that little kids and magical creatures alike flock to him is the cutest thing you’ve ever seen, and yes, he has the cutest smile, and wow you wish you weren’t so stupid because you’ve obviously liked him for a while now. Maybe you even loved him. At this point, who knew? Certainly not you.

You flop down on his couch in defeat. You really should’ve seen that coming from a mile away. At least Taehyung did.

The door rattles and keys jingle from the other side of it, and you realize that the sun had set long ago. You sit up, looking a bit frazzled as Yoongi walks in, and he looks just as startled, not really expecting you to pop up like that.

“What’s up?” he asks with a laugh, placing his keys on the counter.

“Not much. Thanks for sending Taehyung over by the way. How was work? Was Seokjin mad? Is he going to fire me?”

“Relax,” he says as he comes to sit next to you. “He felt really bad, actually. He never meant to put that spell in your stack.”

“Oh.”

Yoongi looks at you with a sweet, sincere smile, and suddenly it’s like you’re seeing him for the first time. His pretty, pale skin. The way his hair falls over his head. His deep, thoughtful eyes.

“Something wrong?” he asks, pulling you out of your trance.

“Um. No. Actually. Okay, wow, I just…”

Don’t hide from him.

“I wanna tell you something.”

“Why doesn’t that sound good?”

“No, no, it’s good!” You pause. “I hope.”

“You’re making me nervous.”

“Okay, okay.” You take a deep breath. Taehyung’s words replaying in your mind.

Don’t hide from him.

“I… think I like you.”

Yoongi stares at you for a moment, and you think he’s about to reject you, and you swear you’re going to murder Kim Taehyung until he says, “That’s a relief.” He inches closer to you, and suddenly you’re very aware of your proximity. “Because I think I like you, too.”

Overwhelmed with the incredible urge to kiss the man in front of you, you only hesitate for a second before your lips are on his, and suddenly everything feels right in the world.

You can’t explain it; maybe it’s magic. Something is dancing through you, lifting you up and making your heart race. It’s something to do with Yoongi, you know, but beyond that you can’t tell. All you really care about is the fact that his lips are so soft and you wish you had done this sooner.

Yoongi’s hand slides to your waist and pulls you onto his lap, desperate to have you as close as possible. The thing in his chest is fucking ecstatic, having waited too long. Yoongi bites down gently on your bottom lip, and your mouth opens to let out a small gasp, a sound he quickly swallows back down. His hands are digging roughly into your sides, itching to go farther but afraid to make the first move. You’re wrapped around his neck, stroking the sensitive skin there.

You depart from his lips, evoking a quiet, needy sound from him as you move across his cheek and down his jaw before reaching his neck. You nip the skin, and Yoongi can’t help but grind up into you. It occurs to you that Min Yoongi is hard underneath you, and you’re doing no better, and you grind down into him, eliciting the sweetest of sounds from him.

“Y/N… we can… we can stop.”

“I don’t want to.”

“A-Are you sure.”

You pause to look up at him and nod eagerly. “I’m sure.”

“I don’t think I’ll be able to hold back,” he says, and the look in your eyes tells you that he’s telling the truth.

You lean in close and whisper, “I don’t want you to.”

He growls, wrapping you around his waist as he stands and carries you into the bedroom. He hardly hesitates, stripping his clothes off before ripping off your own. His eyes drink you in, loving the sight of you flushed and spread out before him, and he’s barely begun. He takes your mouth back in his before leaving kisses across your body, making sure to take pleasured time at your nipples.

He pinches one, rolling it between his fingers as he licks and laps at the other, not ever really wanting to stop because the sounds you make are oh, so pretty. But if it’s sounds he wants then it’s sounds he gets as a stray finger finds its place at your folds, flicking at your clit.

You arch your back, yelling out Yoongi’s name, and he hums in satisfaction. “That’s it, pretty girl. Say my name.”

“Y-Yoongi,” you moan as he descends, wanting to taste you for himself.

“You’re so wet for me already. I’m sorry to keep you waiting.”

“Please, Yoongi,” you whimper, already so pathetically fucked out for him.

“Don’t worry, baby. I’ll take care of you.”

Yoongi sticks his tongue out quickly, just to see your reaction, but it’s hard to tease you when you’re pushing so hard on his head. You yank on his hair, and he gives you a slap on the leg that says, “Behave.”

You squirm under him as he finally puts his mouth on you, tongue working wonders. He easily slips two fingers inside you and you cry out, the sensation nothing but bliss. He licks at you roughly and fucks you on his fingers, loving the way you twist and turn beneath him.

“You taste so good, baby,” he says before returning back to your dripping center.

“Fuck, fuck, Yoongi,” you murmur as he nibbles at your clit. “Don’t stop.”

“You’re not in charge here, baby,” he says before standing up and giving your pussy a slap. You yelp, gripping tightly to the bedsheets. Yoongi’s face is coated in your juices, and he’s never looked happier. “Come here,” he commands.

You obey, though at first you have trouble, your legs shaking from denied pleasure. “Why don’t you get me ready for you?” You take a hold of his cock, already leaking precum and just begging to be sucked, but as you lean in towards him, he grabs a hold of your hair and says, “Nah, uh, baby. I’m gonna give everything I have to that sweet pussy of yours.”

You nod, not able to find a voice for yourself. You pump him gently, and he closes his eyes and relishes the feeling. You pick up your pace and his mouth drops open, face scrunched in concentration as he tries not to cum in your hand right then and there.

Eventually he’s had enough, and he says, “Lay back, babe.”

Your back hits the mattress without a second though, eager to finally have him inside of you. Yoongi laughs, stopping to kiss you gently. He massages your thighs a couple of times before looking deep into your eyes. He doesn’t have to say anything to ask, “Is this okay?”

You give him a small nod, telling him to go ahead. He chases your lips one last time before lining himself up at your entrance.

“Please, Yoongi,” you plead.

He doesn’t respond, but looks at you through lidded eyes, his body awash with lust. “I’ll try to hold back.” He pushes his way in, and the both of you have your heads thrown back in groans of pleasure.

“D-Don’t,” you pant, struggling to find your voice. “Don’t hold back.”

“Baby…”

You grab his arm in urgency, the only thing on your mind the desperate urge to be fucked. “Please!”

Yoongi nods, withdrawing from you carefully before slamming back into you. The force has him slipping out of you, so he respositions himself and holds you close before entering you again. His grip is tight, and you can do nothing but sit there and take it.

Yoongi fucks into you with abandon, pouring everything from the last two years into his thrusts. Hate. Anger. Jealousy. Friendship. Happiness. Adoration.

He’s losing his goddamn mind inside you, and you’re no better.

Something’s alight inside of you, a fine sheen of sweat coating your body, but it’s nothing compared to the feelings raging inside you. You want this to last forever. “Yoongi,” you say, your mind dizzy with lust, “look at me.”

Yoongi does, a hand on your waist coming to trap your wrists above your head, and he stares right into your soul as he fucks the life out of you. You lean up to kiss him, though it’s more or less just tongue on tongue. The room is nothing but the sound of sex, and you can feel your orgasm approaching.

It starts in your toes, climbing its way up your body until you’re shivering. It starts to coil, centering in your stomach.”Y-Yoongi… Fuck… I’m gonna―fuck―I’m gonna cum.”

“I know, babe. Me too. Just wait. Just wait.”

“Fuck, fuck, fuck. Touch me, please.”

Yoongi’s hand darts to your clit, feverishly working the sensitive bud. Your nails dig into his back, the sensation becoming too much.

“Cum with me, babe,” he says, and that’s all it takes for the two of you to come undone together.

You open your mouth in a scream, and Yoongi sticks two fingers in. You bob your head on them as if you were sucking his cock, muffling the sounds of your orgasm.

Finally the two of you come down, heaving as you collapse back onto the bed. You can feel the cum dripping out of you, but you really don’t give a damn. Everything just feels too good.

“Y/N?” Yoongi says through heavy breathing.

“Hm?” you answer sleepily.

“I think I lied earlier. When I said I liked you.”

“What?”

“I think I’m falling in love with you.”

―

And you fall in love right back, and Seokjin is so sick of seeing the two of you cuddle at work that he is actually contemplating firing you both.

“I think I liked it better when you guys always argued,” Seokjin grumbles as he rifles through paperwork. Yoongi only grins, stealing a kiss from you on his way to the greenhouse. “Yuck. Definitely liked it better when you guys always argued.”

“Bite me,” you laugh, sticking your tongue out in defiance.

“That’s my job!” Yoongi calls from the other side of the shop, and Seokjin groans in disgust. You scratch at your hand as you continue to work; the annoying itch set in about two weeks ago and still hasn’t gone away. Seokjin takes notice, and grabs it to inspect.

“Still there, huh?”

“Yeah. Not sure what it is.”

“Get bit?”

“I don’t see a bite mark.”

“I can put a salve on it.”

“Yeah, please.”

Yoongi’s traipsing through the water lily garden when he hears Seokjin shout, “Yah! Get some blue shrooms for your girlfriend! I’m doing a thing!”

“Sounds sketch!” he shouts back but does as he’s told. The shroom patch is extra chatty today, much to his chagrin, and they’re all eager to get a word in. He does a pretty good job at ignoring them until a cursed shroom speaks up. They only have one; it’s good for enemies, as Seokjin says, and it’s an ugly, little thing. It’s green and brown and speaks with venom in its voice.

Yoongi is expecting some vicious jibe or harsh remark, but instead the shroom just says, simply, “What do you love most?”

Yoongi hesitates. “What?”

“You heard me.” The shroom repeats itself. “What, in your life, do you love most?”

It sounds like a harmless question, so Yoongi answers, “Y/N, of course.”

“Of course,” the shroom says, and its mouth morphs into a horrible grin as a shrill scream pierces the air. Yoongi looks up in a panic, knowing full well that that’s you.

“What did you do?” Yoongi shrieks, the thing in his chest bubbling in fear and anger.

“Nothing that wasn’t already done.”

Yoongi rips the shroom out of the ground and throws it onto the floor before running as fast as he can. His human legs, he decides, aren’t fast enough and he’s at your side in the form of a big, black wolf. He morphs back into a human and holds you in his arms, searching to Seokjin for answers.

“What the fuck happened?” he asks, panic rising in his chest.

Seokjin looks just as alarmed. “I don’t know! She was just standing here! And then something happened, I don’t know, and now there’s a mark on her hand!”

“A mark? What mark?” He turns to look down at you and finds you sobbing, clutching desperately at your left hand. His heart aches to see you that way, and the Thing isn’t too happy about it either. “Baby,” he says, “let me see your hand.”

“I c-can’t,” you sob. “H-Hurts, Yoongi, it hurts!”

“Let me see. We can make it go away.”

With coaxing from both Yoongi and Seokjin, you’re able to release your hand long enough to show them the source of your pain. A large ‘X’ is embedded in your skin, written in an odd mix of gold glitter and your own blood.

Seokjin frowns, a look that does not put Yoongi at ease, and says, “Let’s put her to sleep for a bit. Then we can try and discern what’s wrong.”

Yoongi doesn’t have nearly half a second to protest when Seokjin is already casting the spell, and you fall limp in Yoongi’s arms. At least you’re not crying anymore. Yoongi carries you upstairs at Seokjin’s behest and lays you on his bed.

“What the hell is that?” he asks the wizard who’s pacing nervously around the room. He doesn’t get an answer when two figures zap into the room.

“Got your message,” Taehyung says, rushing to your side. “What happened?”

“Maybe you can tell me,” Seokjin replies, anger lacing his voice.

“What? Are you trying to imply I had something to do with it?”

“No. But your friend here might.”

Hoseok looks up in shock. “Okay, I am a lot of things but never, never would I hurt Y/N.”

“Look at her hand,” Seokjin says simply, and the color drains from Hoseok’s face.

“What? But I…”

Then he notices Yoongi standing there, and everything clicks into place. He storms at him, grabbing the shapeshifter and thrusting him against the wall.

“What the fuck?” Yoongi growls, ready to tear him limb from limb.

“What did you do?” Hoseok hisses, and Yoongi can only stare at him dumbfounded.

“What did I do? What did you do?”

“What did you do right before this happened? Right before the mark appeared?” Hoseok pressed.

“I… I don’t know! I was having a conversation with a dumb shroom, is all!”

“You idiot! Shrooms can see into the future!”

“So?”

“Gods, you activated the curse!”

“What curse?”

“Ah, the curse, the curse…” Hoseok mumbles, letting Yoongi down.

Taehyung approaches his friend, and he looks quite calm, so Yoongi isn’t expecting him to slap him so hard across the face.

“Motherfucker,” he fumes. “I told you. I told you. Look what you’ve done!”

“She came to me!”

“And all you had to do was say no! It’s easy! One word! N-O!”

“Will someone please tell me what the fuck is going on here?” Yoongi bellows over the chaos, his voice reverberating enough to shake the room. Yoongi notices that Seokjin is crying, Taehyung’s eyes are glassy, and Hoseok looks like he’s about to collapse; he’s not so sure he wants to know anymore.

“You tell him,” Taehyung whispers. “You tell him.”

“I… I’m sorry… The curse… You can’t go back…”

“W-What?”

“It’s the Devil’s Trade,” Seokjin says, his voice rough. Yoongi has never heard him sound so wrecked. “Take away the thing your enemy loves most.” Yoongi sucks in a breath. “And you shall have the ultimate revenge.”

“At the time of the curse, you loved a record player the most. She was supposed to ask you about. She was supposed to ask you the question. But then she wanted to be nice to you and started being friends, and I guess she forgot.”

“So you’re…” Yoongi stumbles backwards. He can’t breathe. “She’s gonna… I’m…”

“I’m sorry,” Hoseok mumbles again. “She’s gonna die.”

Yoongi doesn’t even realize he’s crying until he can’t see anymore. All he can see is your broken figure, barely heaving a breathe in Seokjin’s bed. Yoongi does what he does best: he runs. He runs right out of the shop and right into the sky.

Yoongi can feel the wind rushing under him; it tugs on his wings like the hand that tugs at his heart. He hates this. Hates that all of a sudden he has no control, his life seemingly flailing like a flag in the wind.

The worst thing, however, has to be the fact that all he can remember is you.

The thing in his chest tells him to go be with you, to be by your side, but he can’t bear to see you like that. He wants to see you laugh and smile and dance with him. He wants to see you waking up next to him. He wants to see you when he comes home.

But he knows it’s not an option. He needs to be strong for you. 

He lands again, and stares at the building where he knows you’re sleeping. He takes a deep breath and steps inside the magic shop, exchanging his fears for a positive attitude.

[mksc77]

For the Drabble List #2, number 45 please! Thank you 😘

Thanks so much for the ask, @ila9182!  

I apologize in advance for the rushed-through beginning--crime content never interests me, and I didn’t want to spend much time on it.

45-- “Please don’t shut me out.”

Sharon sighed in relief when the struggle was over and she could see on the screen that the suspects were just about immobilized...Wait a minute, one of them was missing.  After a quick headcount of her team, she quickly realized that one of her own was also missing.  “You guys, where’s Detective Sykes?” She asked through her mouthpiece, but they were all focusing on getting the ones they had handcuffed and making petty remarks back and forth.  Sharon moved closer to the screen, like that would help anything, but saw no sign of Amy, and she was just now realizing that she hadn’t heard from her in a while and that her audio equipment might not be working properly.  Of course she could still see the house where the child they had been too late to save still was, but not someone she still had a chance of protecting. The boy had been the last of several casualties in this case, and Sharon wasn’t trying to add anymore to that list. “Where is Sykes?” She demanded again, to no avail.  “You guys, where the fucking hell is Amy?!” Sharon screamed in a highly uncharacteristic outburst, finally getting the attention of her team.   They frantically looked around, and Tao spotted her on the ground a good bit behind them. Sharon normally would’ve giggled at hearing Mike mutter “shit the bed” under his breath, but she was overcome with fear when she saw Amy struggling with a rogue suspect.  Mike and the others hurried toward her, and Sharon winced as her head was being banged against hard concrete in her struggle to keep him from getting his gun.  Sharon had seen her team in peril before, but this was the worst.  Watching from the safety of PAB was supposedly a “perk” of being a commanding officer, but sending her team into dangerous situations while she watched helplessly on a screen was one of the most unfavorable parts of her job. “If anyone has a clear shot—“

“I’ve got it, ma’am,” Mike assured her.

Sharon felt herself go limp with relief, and she dropped into a chair as Mike pulled the suspect off of Amy and apprehended his gun while Julio grabbed Amy’s handcuffs and cuffed him.

With the suspects finally in custody, Sharon had to tie up some loose ends before she could leave, so she was the last to arrive at the hospital.  By the time she got there, Amy was already in a room, and the rest of the team was sitting around and talking.  

“Here come the shoulder squeeze and the pillow-fluffing,” Mike murmured when Sharon came in.  

“Hi, everyone,” Sharon greeted warmly, ignoring Mike’s comment. Unfortunately, this wasn’t her first rodeo with having one of her team members in the hospital, and they’d all had their turns as the patient at one point or another.  She walked over to Amy and gave her shoulder a gentle squeeze.  “How are you feeling? Are you comfortable?”  Provenza was speaking the words in unison with her, but she’d never let on before that she always heard them when they spoke along with her or quietly announced to each other what she was about to do.  This scenario had happened enough times for her words and actions to be predictable by now.  

Amy nodded.  “They gave me the good stuff...But ribs still hurt a little bit.”

“Ugh, broken ribs are the worst,” Sharon sympathized. “Let me get you a couple of—“

“Pillows.”  Julio was standing right behind her when she turned around with pillows in his arms.

Sharon rolled her eyes.  “At least one of you is finally helping me out a little bit while making fun of me...Yes, I always hear you,” she said when their smirks turned to looks of panic.

Andy shrugged.  “Hey, who needs medical professionals when you’re around to cure us with excessive pillows?”

Sharon ignored him and turned her attention to arranging the pillows behind Amy and adjusting the incline of her bed.  “Is Chuck staying with you tonight?  They’re just keeping you overnight for observation, right?”

Amy nodded.  “He wanted to come now, but I need some things from my apartment.  I really just want a shower.  And I should be able to go home by noon tomorrow as long as nothing changes.”

“None of us are at our personal best right now,” Sharon agreed.  She, herself was still wearing the same clothes from the day before and hadn’t had a shower in almost 48 hours, and the others were in similar shape.  It was more obvious for the men, with the evidence of a couple of days without a razor on their faces. The critical missing of a four-year-old boy had given them even more urgency than normal to solve the case, and they’d barely paused to eat in the last couple of days, much less to do anything else.  “Can I get you anything?”

“Do you have anything for a bruised ego?” Julio asked, speaking as a typical man and using humor to mask the emotion of the situation.  “She’s still pissed that she let that little twerp overtake her.  He must’ve blindsided her and had her pinned down before she could react, otherwise she would’ve kicked his ass, no contest.”

“I do not—yeah, you’re right,” Amy admitted.  “That probably hurts more than anything.”  

“Well, if that’s the biggest problem, I don’t think there’s much to worry about.”  Sharon eyed the thermos of water on the table beside Amy’s bed and handed it to her.  “Drink some water.  Andy said you were a little dehydrated, and you haven’t had any since I got here.”

“You’ve barely been here for five min—okay,” Amy conceded, knowing it would be faster to just obey.  

A little while later, Sharon was the last to leave.  She sat on the edge of the bed and put her hand over Amy’s.  “I’m sorry this happened, Amy.” Six years later, “this just happens sometimes, no matter how well you plan it” still wasn’t acceptable to her. She wanted to know how Amy and the others had gotten separated to the point that no one noticed she was in danger and how to prevent it from happening again. She wanted to know why even her most careful and seemingly-foolproof plans sometimes still sent someone on her team to the hospital. But that would have to wait.

Amy took a sip of water and lay back down. “You don’t need to apologize.  It’s just the job.  It’s not like I didn’t know from the beginning what I was getting myself into.”

Sharon lightly squeezed her hand.  “I’ll let you get some rest, but let me know if I can do anything for you.  I can stop by in the morning if you need something.”

Later that night, Andy was asleep before his head hit the pillow.  Sharon also should’ve been, as she hadn’t had more than few-minute naps here and there for the last couple of days, but now that she knew Amy was okay, all she could think about was the four-year-old who had been killed on her watch.  Andy’s steady breathing and occasional snores beside her were infuriating.  She wished she could shake off the last few days and fall asleep as easily as he could, but despite being exhausted, her mind was in overdrive, and her heart ached for the little boy.  He’d reminded her so much of Ricky, and the image of him was haunting her.  How frightened and confused he must’ve been.  Murder always hurt her heart, obviously, but the cases that hit her hard enough to send her to her therapist’s office always involved children.  She’d been relieved in her early LAPD days when she’d gotten promoted out of patrol, bringing an end to dealing with child abuse and neglect and pulling children out of crashed cars just for them to die in her arms.  She’d liked the change of pace that had come with Major Crimes and the satisfaction of affecting the community more directly than she felt she was doing in FID, but it had also meant that she was once again frequently exposed to the darkest corners of humanity.  She’d had enough of it, and she’d never been so happy to be less than a month away from retirement.

Giving up on sleep for the time being, Sharon quietly slipped out of bed and pulled a sweatshirt over her head.  After getting a glass of wine for the first time in a few days, she grabbed a blanket from the living room and went outside to sit by the pool.  The March night was chilly, and her red wine warmed her from the inside as she stretched out in a lounge chair, draped the soft, lilac-colored blanket over herself, and sipped the soothing liquid.  She listened to the sounds of various animals in the nearby woods in the otherwise quiet and still night.  She’d definitely missed this after moving to the condo, and it was one of the things she was enjoying the most about being back in a house.  The full moon lit up the yard, and its reflection shimmered in the pool water.  The calming atmosphere was helping Sharon to finally relax, which she knew would lead to a good, cleansing cry.  She’d been too tense for that until now, and it was just what she needed to move on.

Sharon hadn’t been stretched out by the pool for very long before she heard the door from the porch close and saw Andy coming down the steps.  “The hell are you doing? It’s after midnight,” he mumbled as he gently nudged her over and squeezed into her chair beside her.  

“Couldn’t sleep.”  Sharon curled into him, grateful for the extra warmth, but wishing he’d go back inside.  Crying was a solo activity, and she could already feel a lump in her throat and her eyes starting to well up.

“Couldn’t sleep?  I was sleeping like a log until I heard the alarm beep when you opened the door.”  They’d been in the new house for a couple of weeks, now, and they were still adjusting to the new rhythms and sounds, like the brief chirping of the alarm system every time a door opened.

“You were sawing some logs, too,” Sharon muttered.  

“Why didn’t you hit me and tell me to shut the hell up? You usually don’t hesitate to do that.”

Sharon shrugged.  “That’s not really what was keeping me up.”  Tears were pricking at her eyes as she relaxed against Andy, not for the first time that week.  She furiously blinked them away, and a quick wipe of her eyes held them off for the time being.  Damn it, she’d come out here so she could have a good cry, clear her head, and hopefully finally fall asleep.  She’d only cried in front of Andy a couple of times, but those times hadn’t been anything close to the ugly sobbing that was about to ensue.  “I’m fine, Andy, I just need a few minutes to myself.”

Andy usually respected her space when she asked for it, and she didn’t request to be left alone that often, but he knew how much the case had bothered her and didn’t like the thought of her sitting out here by herself in the middle of the night.  Or of shouldering so much emotion alone. “I’m not going anywhere, Sharon.”

“Andy, please—“

“No, Sharon, you please.  Please don’t shut me out.”

Sharon couldn’t stop the tears from flowing this time, and Andy’s arm wrapped firmly around her confirmed that he wasn’t leaving.  She was too tired to resist him and melted into his side, no longer trying to keep her tears at bay.  Andy stroked her hair with one hand and rubbed her back with the other.  He rested his chin on top of her head and wordlessly held her as sobs wracked her body, causing her to shake against him.  By the time her sobs were slowing down to sniffling and hiccups, Andy’s pajama top was drenched with her tears.  She smoothed her fingers over the wet spot and gave him an apologetic look.  “Sorry.”

Andy pressed a slow, soft kiss to her forehead.  “It’s all right. I think I’ll manage.”

Sharon shifted against Andy and sipped her wine as he adjusted the blanket over her.  She could’ve stayed outside and enjoyed the atmosphere of the back yard all night, but she was finally getting drowsy and starting to feel like she could calm her thoughts enough to fall asleep. She drained her wine glass and started to get up, and Andy offered her a hand and laced his fingers through hers once they were both on their feet.  “You think you can get some sleep now?”

Sharon draped the blanket over her arm and lay against his shoulder.  “Yeah.  Let’s go to bed.”

[kookie-vith-suga]

Suit and tie(d)

Word count: 2210

Warnings: none

Author’s note: Okay I know I was gone for soo long and I actually did not really wrote a lot but I did finished this request! Hope whoever requested this gets to read it and hopefully even like it!

By the way I was still checking on notifications and I am overwhelmed that many people still read my stuff even though I was not around and posted :)

Anyway thank you and if you are interested my trip to Ghana was awesome! We visited a lot of old friends and seen some places which was kinda exhausting every now and then but overall totally worth it :)

So about this: I am really brought about the title and I actually quiet enjoy writing this and I could see myself adding it to the list of MUST BE CONTINUED which is terribly long I know I am trash but yeah if you like it leave me some feedback and with that I am off ♥

Last: Ordniary XII

Request: Hello! When you have time could you do a Yoongi CEO au? And the reader is a confident sassy girl with a savage mouth, and she is new and somehow, he takes a liking in her?

Apparently, there are some people in this world who are born sloths. I looked at my wristwatch for the hundredth time certainly and rolled my eyes as I glanced back at the girl who was pouring the coffee into the cup in slow motion. How the hell is that even possible?!? I rubbed over my forehead with the back of my hand which granted me another look at my watch. Fuck it I only have twenty minutes left. Congratulations Y/N. Already late at your first day. And why? Because of your fucking coffee addiction. Seriously I will stop from tomorrow on.

Finally, the girl managed to hand the cup to the woman in front of me which meant I was the next in line. I let out an annoyed groan and wanted to step forward when suddenly out of nowhere a tall, light blond-haired man appeared, walked right passed me and leaned onto the counter. He started making a huge order. For at least 8 different coffees. This will take forever. I was fuming.

I set up a bittersweet smile and tapped the shoulder of the man, but I did not wait till he turned around but already started talking: “Excuse me, Sir. Are you dense? Did your mother not teach you any manners? There is a line here for a reason. And it is clearly not for you to just ignore it and be the huge dick you must be since you just thought it would be alright to skip the line”, I ended my rant perfectly.

The man slowly turned around and for a second I held my breath. He. Was. Handsome. And when I say that I mean like above average handsome. He wore a white fitting dress shirt with a trench coat draped casually over his shoulders. Immediately I caught myself regretting my words and bit down on my lip.

“What is your name?”, a deep voice asked. Till I had the voice connected to him and realized the question was for me it took me some seconds in which I was left staring at him.

“Y-Y-Y/N. Y/L/N Y/N.” I stuttered out after the too long pause.

“I see Y/LN Y/N. I am very sorry for my rude behavior. I hope I can make it up to you somehow?”

What is he saying? “N-n-no it is fine. Just don’t do it again.”

He had turned back to the counter handing the woman a bill alongside a pristine smile and a nod towards me. She seemed to understand and just started shaking her head up and down while grinning like an idiot.

With a satisfied look he faced me again. “Fair enough. Thank you for being so generous and I promise not to”, he sounded serious although he was smiling brightly for some reason. I nodded afraid to stutter again and make an even bigger fool out of myself.

He picked two bags of the counter which the girl must have managed to finish in record time. How did she even work that fast all the sudden?! “Thank you, Kati. I wish you a nice day and we see us tomorrow.”

He walked past me but not without winking at me.

“What a strange guy”, I murmured to myself.

“So I would like to have a blac-“ She slid a cup towards me which made me stop midways. I picked up the cup and opened the lid. It was a black coffee with a little cream and cinnamon on top. 

“B-b-but how did you know?!” Now I must look like an idiot since my mouth gaped open. I pointed to the coffee and then to her and then at the cup again.

“Lady, we are all waiting here too. Can you just pay and go?” Not that it was my fault that this girl was a sloth. I rolled my eyes.

“Okay, okay”, I grumbled and fiddled my purse out of my bag.

“It has already been taken care of”, the barista put off.

“By whom?”, I questioned startled.

“Well I guess you are really lucky today”, she shrugged, and all her attention went to the woman behind me who shoved me aside ungently. I stumbled a little before catching myself.

Did he..? Still wondering I hurried out of the store still with a little hope left I could be on time clutching to my coffee cup.

And surprisingly I really did arrive punctual. As a panting mess who had to catch its breath for nearly two minutes but then I was good to go. I entered the huge skyscraper and rode the elevator to the 14th floor. There I was greeted by a woman in her mid-thirties. She had a reserved face and granted me only a small smile which vanished short after. We shook hands and immediately she started walking and talking. I was a little overwhelmed since I never had a talent for multitasking. So I did my best to not stumble over my feet and fall while trying to listen. To my unfortune she was talking fast. Really fast. She pointed towards a room which looked like a copy room and then to the next one with a small kitchen. She told me what my tasks would be and what I surely should not do.

My eyes wandered around. A lot of tables with a lot of computers with a lot of people hanging over them. That was basically it. I looked back at her giving her a whole-body scan. She was wearing a tight black skirt which showed off her curves perfectly and a loose white blouse. I got to say I was kind of amazed by that for a second which led to me not listening to what she just explained me. Screw it! It is not a hard job anyway. Just copying and filing stuff should not be the problem.

“This is your place to sit. If you have any questions, try to answer them yourself. We are all busy”, she finished off. Wow not exactly the nicest person I have encountered. I forced a smile and nodded alongside a small “thank you”. She left, and I looked at the spot which was declared as mine. A simple table and a simple chair. I could not expect much as a temp I guess. Well the payment was really good for what I have heard, and I did need that money.

I plopped down on the chair, examined all the folders, papers and sticky notes with remarks on my table. I let out a loud sigh. Let’s get to work!

I did my best to fulfill all the requests and wishes on the sticky notes although it already took me 15 minutes to figure out how that hell of a copier worked. I just exited the copy room for the twenties time to get the next five folders I had to replicate when my eyes fell on a more or less familiar face. The guy from earlier was standing in a doorframe casually leaning against it while talking to the scold who broke me in.

My eyes were lingering on him a few seconds longer before I decided I wanted to say what I had to say. So without thinking further, I approached him. At first, he did not recognize me I guess he was so deeply involved in their conversation. But when I stopped right in front of him his face lit up in surprise.

  “Well hello th-“, he started but I was determined to talk first: “You did not have to pay for my coffee”; I paused and checked his face for a reaction. And yes, there was indeed one. The corner of his lips curled upwards.

That grin made something stir in me and I added: “As nice as that gesture supposed to be I want to make sure you know my forgiveness is not for sell.”

“Noted”, he simply responded with that shit of a grin on his face. He is making fun of me!

“Moreover you know it is pretty creepy that you know how I take my coffee. Just saying. I hope you are not some kind of stalker who I happen to work with now.”

“Oh, you are working here now?”, he completely ignored what I just said.

“Just temporary.”

He cocked an eyebrow like he just realized something. “I see you are the temp….That means we will see us more often from now on.” On his face a mysterious look.

“I guess so”, I mumbled not really understanding his point of saying this.

“Great.” He clapped his hands once which startled me enough to stumble back.

“I am afraid you did not really understand what I said before. I don’t want th-“

“I did understand you and you have nothing to worry about. I am not interested in you.” He interrupted me and shrugged.

I blew up my cheeks. “You are all the same. Arrogant suit asses.”

“As much as I liked to stay with you and listen to your nice words I just got a call. But I make sure we will see us, Miss Y/L/N.” He gave me a small nod and closed the door right in front of my nose.

My eyes wandered to the silver plate attached to the door and surveyed the engraving. “Chief Executive Officer Min Yoongi”, I read out loud and instantly I threw my hands over my mouth. Please tell me this is not true. I did not just call the CEO of the company, I barely worked for a day, an asshole?!

Fuck, fuck, fuck. What do I do know? I gotta apologize! When I lose this job I have to start the whole search again. And I won’t find one which is paid that well and I would maybe have to move again when I cannot pay the rent and oh my god. I was hyperventilating. Calm down, Y/N. Just go to him and tell him you have a rare disease. Something with your brain that lets to you offending people by accident. Bullshit. He will never believe that. I felt so stupid I could rip out my hair. This can only ever happen to me. Typical me. Really.

The rest of my working hours I passed rather unproductive while trying to come up with another excuse for my behavior. But I guess there were none.

6 pm. I sighed. It is home time. And probably the last one for me at this job. I gathered my things and looked around if I could spot someone familiar. Most of the work stations were cleared already. The people went home pretty early for such a big company. I would have guessed they work all night. The room at the very end of the office which was separated through a glass front I saw important looking women and men gathered for a meeting. They started quiet some time ago. I knew he had to be among them so I decided I should wait if I really wanted to come back tomorrow. I sank down in my chair again and closed my eyes.

I startled up as I felt a heavy hand on my shoulder shaking me lightly. I rubbed my eyes and yawned before I looked at the person who woke me.

“Miss Y/L/N if I remember it right your shift was over two hours ago.”

Immediately I stood up on my feet and bowed small. “Yes, Sir. You are right. B-b-ut”, I stopped to collect myself. I really did not want to apologize since I still think I am right. I took a deep breath. “I wanted to apologize for my inappropriate words from earlier. I had no right to say such disrespectful things to you since you only tried to be nice. I hope you can forgive me somehow. I know there is no reason for you to excuse such rude behavior, but I really truly sorry. Also, I need this job. If I lose it, I must move to another apartment and maybe even another city and I don’t want to do that.” I felt my heart pace increasing as soon as I only thought about it again. “I know it was wrong and I will make sure it will never happen again when you allow me to stay. I will show you my best side. Every. Day. I will work harder than everyone else here. I will make sure to stay extra hours if it is needed. Please just let me stay. I would really do anything.

“Anything?”, he cocked an eyebrow.

A little perplexed by his question I started nodding slowly but then more vigorously.

“That is good to know. For future plans you know”, that fucking smirk appeared again.

What is he talking about? Can I stay now!?! I tried not to roll my eyes over him always ignoring my actual question.

“So I am not fired?”, I blurted out not able to hold it in anymore.

“No, it is fine. Just don’t do again”, he used some very familiar words while leaning closer. His mouth was right next to my ear when he added in a breathy voice: “Or else I have to punish you.”

I had not noticed that I held my breath till he pulled back and smiled mischievously.

“I will see you tomorrow, Miss Y/L/N. Have a goodnight.”

He walked away and I stood there frozen to the ground.

I think I was just sexually harassed by my boss.

That is it! I like it since it is funny and it can be funny even more if you like!

[boltjacksonstories]

Jesús

I

It's difficult to understand exactly how much space there is in this world if you grew up anywhere outside of Arizona. Few regions rival its spaciousness. Kansas may be, and the Sahara, sure – but who would want to live in Kansas or the Sahara? Jesús thought he might. Anywhere outside of Arizona sounded good to him. He didn't know much about Kansas or the Sahara, and I wouldn't say that he cared to either. All he knew was this: those places were not Arizona. As such, they sounded alright to Jesús. Like most boys his age, Jesús did not know much about life. All he knew was that his life was exceptionally difficult.

           “The other boys will bully me all the way home, mama.” Jesús would plead with his mother, busy in the kitchen. She was busy, always busy, sometimes in the kitchen, sometimes in their living space, and sometimes in their shared bedroom. It was only Jesús and María in their cramped apartment, so far removed from the space outside of it. She was getting ready for work and while she did want to console her son, she did not have the time to do it.

           “I’m sorry the other boys are being hard on you, my love,” said María, “but I’m sure they are just trying to get to know you. Boys can be like that, you know. I remember how the boys used to tease me.” For a moment, she did remember. María, now and in her younger days, was a beauty queen. The boys did pick on her because they liked her, but Jesús was not as pretty as she was. She continued, “Now come on – we’ve got to get going, hijo.”

           Jesús, except for a sigh, offered no more protest. María had taken a second job and was running late for her shift. It was time to go. He rushed into the living room and grabbed his backpack, lighter than it should be.

“Where’s my Jesus?” he wondered. There weren’t many places it could be in here. Jesús looked around the living room to no avail. It wasn’t under the coffee table or even in the cracks of their old couch. Jesús was becoming frantic.

“Come on, honey. Let’s go!” Jesús could hear the exclamation point in her tone and knew she meant business.

“I’m coming! Hold on!” Jesús zoomed past his mother and into their bedroom. There he was, hiding under Jesús’s pillow. Jesús grabbed his Jesus, rushed back to his mama’s side, and they were out the door. She pushed little Jesús onto the stoop, locked the door behind her, and gave him a little kiss.

“Just remember,” she said, “Those boys probably like you and don’t know how to make friends with you. That’s the way it always was for me.”

“Mama,” Jesús whined, “That’s different!”

“Run along, hijo,” she said, “Or we’ll both going to be late.”

They parted ways with a hug and then Jesús was alone. He began his flat, hot, and dry trek to school once again. The only thing that could break up the monotony of his daily walk past the same cacti and tumbleweeds was his favorite toy Action Hero Jesus.

 II

Action Hero Jesus was fully robed and stood at twelve inches tall with dark sunglasses, a confident grin, and fully opposable thumbs. His body language seemed to scream an ironic “You Betcha!”. No sober-minded adult would take this seriously as an action figure for a child. Jesús’s father, far from being sober-minded, bought the toy from the bargain bin of a pharmacy while he was running late for his son’s birthday. When asked why he would buy a little boy something so sacrilegious, all he could say was “What? It’s Jesus.” Action Hero Jesus was Jesús’s last tangible line to his father who left soon after that birthday.

           Jesús felt a connection with this toy that he did not understand. It was his constant companion. As he walked to school, he wouldn’t see the tumbleweeds and the cacti. He would only see his Jesus. He would sit in class and not hear a single word. He only thought of his Jesus and their adventures. At recess that day, he sat alone on the bleachers, unaware of his surroundings. He thought about what might happen if he lost his Jesus and began to cry.

“Jesus Freak is fucking crying! Holy shit!” Dylan, Jesús’s near-constant bully, had snuck upon him. Tray, Dylan’s usual accomplice, followed.

“Oh, shit Dyl! Do you think he just found out that Jesus dies at the end?” Tray joked. Jesús came back to reality and defended himself.

“I am not crying!” Jesús said, with a sniff, “It is so dry outside that my eyes just look wet by comparison!”

“Really? If that were true, then how come your pussy looks so dry?”

“Oh, shit Dyl! You don’t have to crucify him!”

Jesús did not enjoy this treatment, but he had come to expect it. He knew that Dylan wouldn’t hurt him on school grounds. He knew it was all talk, for now. Still, the talk continued.

“Speaking of pussies, what you doing later, pussy?” Dylan asked.

“Nothing,” said Jesús.

“Are you sure?”

“Yes.”

“Didn’t we have something planned?”

“No.”

“Are you sure?”

“Yes.”

“I’m pretty sure we had something planned.”

“No, we did not.”

Tray, unsure of if he had missed out on potential plans or not, felt anxious.

“Oh, now I remember,” said Dylan, quite pleased with himself, “That’s right. After school today, I’m gonna kick your dick so hard that it becomes a pussy. That’s the thing we had planned.”

“You didn’t… invite me?” asked Tray.

“It’s a joke, man. Come on.” Even Dylan was tired of Tray.

“Okay,” said Tray. There was an uncomfortable pause before Tray continued, “Just to be clear though, I am invited?”

“Shut-up!”

Jesús, unsure if they had forgotten about him or not, thought it best to just slip away. He knew Dylan wouldn’t follow him. At least not for now.

“That’s right, just turn the other pussy cheek, you pussy! I’ve had this planned out for weeks! After school, Jesus Freak. I’m gonna kick you a new pussy.”

Jesús heard the threats but didn’t think anything of them. Dylan was all talk, and besides, Jesús had Jesus on his side. For whom shall he fear? For Dylan, apparently.

 III

True to his word, Dylan had, in fact, planned for this dick-kicking several weeks in advance. Dylan may not have been a lot of things, but he was organized.

Dylan, as it turned out, had his own daddy issues. Whereas Jesús wondered where his father was and why he left, Dylan feared where his father was and wished he would leave. Dylan’s father was a volatile character prone to emotional and physical outbursts. Dylan learned to avoid these moments by planning out his time out well. All the pressure, all the walking on eggshells, all the fears of his old man; it all made Dylan a real asshole. Dylan thought he was doing the best he could, but he was still being an asshole, even for a fifth-grader. Jesús knew this, on some level, but couldn’t fully comprehend it at his young age. So, when threatened with physical violence by Dylan for the umpteenth time, Jesús did not take the threat seriously and took the same path home that day that he always took. Dylan would be waiting for him on that path, as promised, eager to make good on his planning.

For now, Jesús returned to his day and continued to let it pass by him as before. By the final bell’s ring, Jesús had forgotten Dylan’s threats. He walked home lost in fantasy with his Jesus. He imagined the forces of Satan were attacking them from every side. Action Hero Jesus would turn five loaves into five thousand, thus over-satisfying the demon of gluttony. He would raise a young saint from the dead, thereby thwarting a scheming incubus. He would use his heat vision to blast Satan into the third dimension of hell, ending the battle.

At this point in the story, it’s worth noting that Jesús never read the Bible. María was too busy for church and the toy was way more fun than a book. All he knew about Jesus was the toy. That, combined with a few too many superhero movies, made Jesús’s Jesus incredibly powerful. Unfortunately for Jesús, Jesus was only powerful in his imagination, where Jesús spent too much time.

When Jesús turned the corner by the post office, one of the final turns before he reached his street, he didn’t see the foot aimed directly at his groin. Attached to that foot was a leg, and to that leg a torso, and to that torso a satisfied Dylan. With the timing of a dancer, Dylan swung clear through Jesús’s crotch, forever damaging his confidence. Tray laughed close behind.

Jesús awoke on the ground with his armed sprawled out to his side and heat emanating from where his dick used to be.

“Did you kick my dick off?” Jesús asked, to no one in particular.

“In. I kicked your dick in, Jesus Freak.” Dylan laughed at his own remark. “Now you’re who you’re supposed to be, a pussy with a pussy.”

“Where’s… Where’s my Jesus?” Jesús looked to his right, to his left… nothing.

“Don’t worry, we’ve got him,” this was Tray’s time to shine, as he showed Jesús his Jesus, “Barbie Jesus here ain’t got no nuts to kick. We’ll just draw a little pussy on him instead.”

“No!”

Laughing, Tray proceeded to draw one small, singular, straight line on Jesus’s groin, which resembled that of a Ken doll. One small, perhaps half an inch little line from a permanent pen was all it took to emasculate Jesus forever. But Tray wasn’t finished yet.

“See?! Now he’s got a little pussy, just like you. Here ya go, boss.” Tray handed the Jesus to Dylan.

“Don’t call me boss.”

“Yes, sir.”

“I’m not okay with sir either.”

“I don’t know what you want from me.”

“Give me back my Jesus!” said Jesús, beginning to stand.

“But we’re not done with him yet!” said Dylan, “It’s not fair that you’re the only one who gets his little pussy kicked. We have to kick Jesus’s pussy, too!”

“Stop!”

But it was too late. Dylan dropped Jesus to the ground and proceeded to stomp on him until he was a mangled and unrecognizable plastic corpse. Jesús, on his knees, watched the scene unfold in slow motion. With the hot Arizona beating down on him, he was helpless as Dylan continued to stomp on his Jesus, over and over again. When he finally stopped, Jesús wanted to cry. Dylan burped.

“Okay, this is done,” he turned to Tray, who still didn’t know how to address him, “Let’s go, Sailor Moon starts in ten minutes,” Dylan turned back to Jesús, “Laters, pussy.”

Jesús could barely hear Dylan anymore, anyhow. His life, his love, his connection to his father, his Jesus… it lay before him broken, unable to resurrect itself. In other eras of human history, young Jesús would have torn his cloth or gnashed his teeth, but in modern times, there was nothing like that for Jesús to do. He just stared in silence.

The rest of the day drifted by him in a gray haze. The next thing he knew, he was home. And then after that, so was María. Soon after, there was food in his mouth. Soon after that, he was lying in bed, huddled under the covers. María, exhausted from her own day, knew that something was not quite right but felt relieved to have a quiet evening. She, too, soon found herself under her covers, and, even sooner than Jesús, found herself asleep. Jesús finally fell asleep as well, still holding his broken toy. As he drifted into a sad and lonely sleep, one tear fell from the cheek of Jesús to land on the cheek of Jesus.

 IV

           Lucid dreaming will only interest those seeking to escape mundanity. It appears a superpower, this ability to control everything around you and do whatever you want. It reveals a desire for control. Who needs to do whatever you want in a dream when you can do whatever you want when you’re awake? Jesús had never heard of lucid dreaming, but that doesn’t mean he wasn’t a fan.

           Jesús was so in control of his dreams that he even created the illusion that he wasn’t. He dreamt that night like he always did, expecting nothing out of the ordinary. That’s why it was a complete shock when Jesus appeared to him.

           Seemingly out of nowhere, Jesus rose before his eyes. Jesús could not recall where he was, why he was there, or what he was doing beforehand. None of that mattered now. It all paled in comparison to the fact that a twelve-foot tall, living, breathing, and fully plastic Action Hero Jesus stood before him, too bright to look in the face. Awed, Jesús fell to his knees before his Jesus.

           “My Lord! I am not worthy!” Jesús would not have known if he was terrified, excited, or both. With his face to the ground, he began to tremble. Jesus spoke.

           “Hey, little dude! No worries! You can stand, my man. It’s cool!”

Jesus’s cavalier “You Betcha!” smirk matched his tone. Even in this form, Jesus remained true to his plastic anatomy. Only his jaw could move, and even that movement was in a limited range; up and down, nothing more. The same awkward movements applied to the rest of his body. He was only jointed at the hip, jaw, elbows, and thumbs. Every movement had to pass through these physiological gatekeepers. Truly, we are all slaves to our bodies. Jesus continued.

           “Everybody is always like ‘Lord!’ this, or ‘I’m not worthy!’ that… It’s truly enbeedee, my dude. I’m a man!, just like you. Thumbs up!”

           Jesus, confident as ever, gave a thumbs up and smiled, as he was wont to do. Jesús, not used to being addressed in this way, looked up. “Jesus has no clue how cool he looks from here,” he thought.

           “I know, I know. I look super extra cool like this. If there is one thing these toymakers got right, it is that I am a super relaxed guy. Hang ten!”

           Jesús finally understood why Jesus had those bitching shades on, for he could see it now: a bright glow followed the Savior’s face wherever he looked. Nearly blinded by the glow himself, Jesús returned his gaze downward.

           “You are too luminous, My Lord!” Jesús didn’t even know that he knew that word. “This must be what speaking in tongues is,” he thought.

           “Oh, right! Let me turn that down, right quick. There, is thaat better?”

           Jesús looked up again. Indeed, it was better. Jesus smiled down at him.

           “Mahalo, my child. Now rise.”

           Jesus indicated an upward motion with his thumbs and elbows. Jesús, as if possessed, followed.

           “Great job! Now listen here, tiny J: change is a-coming.”

           Jesús was not listening. He was so wound up with guilt that could not contain himself any longer.

           “I am sorry I let them beat you up, Jesus! Dylan was too strong! I promise I will avenge you!”

           “Avenge me? That’s not my thing… at all! Here, have a Capri-Sun. Capri-Suns are more of my thing than avenging.”

           To his amazement, a Capri-Sun appeared in Jesús’s hand. What’s more, it was the rarest of flavors, Pacific Cooler.

           “Pacific Cooler?! Holy shit!,” Jesús caught himself and apologized, “Oh. I am sorry, Jesus.”

           “For what? Pacific Cooler is tits! That’s why I created it.”

           “So… you don’t care if we curse?”

           “It’s no biggie, my dude! Words are just words. It’s all about the intent behind them. Now chill on that pri-pri for a moe, we gots to chat.” Before he knew it, a thin, yellow straw was in his mouth. Jesus continued.

           “Here’s the deal, little J: people forget this, but my whole deal is actually all about love. There’s not enough of it in this world, there’s not enough of it in this country, there’s not enough of it in this town, and there’s not enough of it in your heart. I know you’ve had it hard, young J, and I know that you’ve been hurt. You need to learn that the only way to respond is with love.”

           Jesús continued to gulp down his Pacific Cooler, extra crisp in the presence of the Lord. The straw never seemed to end. Jesús looked down to find his suspicions confirmed: the straw went on for an eternity or more.

           “I’m gonna let you borrow a few miracles, and you are going to use them to start spreading the love we want to see in this world, capiche? Not only that, but you’re also going to look hella cool doing it!”

           As Jesús listened and enjoyed this rare beverage, a pair of dark sunglasses, seemingly carried by angel doves, landed softly on his ears and nose.

           “Looking sharp! Let’s see, what else… what else…,” Jesus, free to fully spin at the hip, spun while he thought. “Nope! Nothing else, little dude. Just remember that it is all about love. Act out of love, and the world will respond accordingly.”

           Jesús repeated the maxim through garbled sugar water.

           “Actrouttatrove…”

           “That’s right. And the world will respond. With love.”

           “Wittrove.”

           “Correctomundo, mini J. I hate to ditch the sitch but it’s almost moe-moe for ya, bud! Namaste, my dude. Act out of love, and the world will respond…” Jesus began yet another ascension.

           “But... but!” But it was too late. Much faster than expected, Jesus, his everlasting light, and the Capri-Sun were all gone. Only the holy shades remained.

Suddenly, the floor beneath Jesús disappeared. He tried to scream but nothing would come out as he felt himself rushing back to earth. He was definitely not in control of this. He felt sure he would not hit the ground, but it continued to rush towards him. Right before he hit, POOF, Jesús woke up.

 V

           Jesús arose in heavenly spirits. He didn’t even notice his Jesus had disappeared.

           “Holy me,” Jesús thought, “It feels like I’ve slept for three days.”

           Jesús felt different but was not sure how. He was still contemplating what had changed when he entered the kitchen. María had no issue seeing what was different and alerted young Jesús to the changes immediately. She nearly dropped her glass of grape juice when she saw him.

           “Ay Dios Mio!”, she said, “Hijo, how are you floating?!”

           Indeed, Jesús was floating twelve inches above the ground. Not only that, but he also wore a white robe with dark sunglasses. “Ah,” thought Jesús, “so that’s why it feels like I am floating.” He wasn’t sure before she said something, but now he knew without a doubt: Jesús was Jesus.

           María passed out. Young Jesús, being the good boy that he was, caught her before she hit the linoleum and brought her back to life. She told him she needed water, so he changed her grape juice to dihydrogen monoxide right before her eyes. She nearly passed out again, but he stopped her.

           “What, my son,” she asked, “Has happened to you?” She could not look him directly in the face because the light behind him shone too bright.

           “I do not know, mama,” Jesús said, “but I was visited by Jesus in a strange dream. I thought it was just a dream, mama!”

           María, unable to believe her ears, again exited consciousness. This time, Jesús let her rest. He guided her to bed, tucked her in, and gave his mama a kiss on the forehead. It was almost time for school.

           “But what about her work?” Jesús thought, “She will surely be fired if she does not show up.” Jesús laid it upon the heart of María’s manager to allow her to skip her shift without consequence. Jesús willed it, and it was so.

 VI

           Jesús arrived at school that day ready to receive his followers. Everyone could sense his presence before they could see him. When he passed, some trembled in fear while others bowed and wept. A path was cleared for young Jesús wherever he moved. Children scampered up palm tree to pull branches (an Arizonan’s only source of shade!) and lay them down as a path for Jesús to walk on. When he reached the playground, a wailing sister, with her injured brother in tow, threw herself to the feet of Jesús to beg.

           “Oh, great healer!” she cried, “You must help my brother, you must! He has fallen off the monkey bars and broken his arm. He is in great pain, great healer! But I have faith in you!”

           The holy spirit was strong in this young sister. She was able to recognize a deity when she saw one. One look at her little brother would confirm her prognosis – his wrist was bent at a rather acute angle and he was not able to move it. What’s more, he appeared to be in great pain. His cheeks were flush with blood and soaked in tears. Jesús felt for him.

           “I will heal your brother, kind sister,” Jesús said. Without much of a show about it, he cusped the whimpering boy’s wrist. He smiled at the boy and soon the boy smiled back. When Jesús released his wrist, it was healed. Even those who saw it had a hard time believing it, but it was true. The boy thanked Jesús, who humbly could not accept.

           “Go now, have fun. As for you, sister,” Jesús now turned to the crowd so that they may hear, “Let this be a lesson to all of you: with a little love, and an even smaller amount of faith, all things can be accomplished. Look to this sister as an example of love and kindness.” He now turned back to the sister, “You have done well. Go now and be blessed.”

           With tears in her eyes, she nodded and chased after her brother. The entire crowd was moved by the poignant scene. Some hugged, others cried, I saw one couple making out, although I’m pretty sure they were doing that before Jesús came to the playground. Not that it mattered to Jesús. He’s always been strictly pro-love, both in the making and giving.

           A hush fell over the crowd as Dylan approached Jesús. His demeanor, too, was different than before. Dylan now looked up to Jesús with reverence and even a smidge of fear. Jesús, on the other hand, looked at Dylan with only love. Given Dylan’s home life, he was not prepared to receive love so freely given to him. It seemed to him something that he did not want. He imagined the feeling of love to be a gooey and messy feeling that would be sticky and get all over the place. He was half-right about that last part, and Jesús was okay with that too.

           “Jesús,” Dylan began, still not able to look Jesús in the eye, “I’m sorry for stomping on your doll and shit. And all the pussy stuff. Please forgive me.” Dylan threw himself before the Lord. Jesús, kind as ever, lifted him up softly from the chin.

           “It is okay, Dylan. I forgive you. Now go, spread the good word.”

           “But I don’t want to go!” Dylan protested, “I know I said some awful shit, but… I want to follow you.”

           “I do too!” said Tray, never far behind Dylan.

           “And me!” cried Susie.

           “And I as well!” cried John.

           John’s friend Matthew followed as well. Saul couldn’t be convinced, but Paul followed willingly. Six more made it known that they intended to follow. Jesús shrugged his holy shoulders. There was nothing he could do to stop them.

           “I cannot stop you from following me,” Jesús said, “But I will not change my path. I love you all.”

           Jesús continued his journeys now followed by a group of his peers, other children. They were fiercely devoted to their new Lord, although they weren’t quite sure why. They were caught up in the air of Jesus, or Jesús, as they saw him. The line between the two could no longer be distinguished. It cannot be helped that Jesus, the man, is a star, or else why would we still be talking about him? With being a star comes certain star qualities, one of those being that people follow you wherever you go. It cannot be helped. Jesús, endowed with Jesus’s star qualities, went on his way and his apostles followed. Jesús was unaware of the inevitable pitfalls of being Jesus because he had never read the Bible. He was unaware that there was a Judas in his midst, plotting to sell him to the highest bidder.

 Tray’s Chapter

           The next part of our story is best told by the young man who experienced it. It will be dictated by none other than Tray, an unwitting pawn in a grand game of spiritual chess.

This is Tray talking now, pleased to meet ya.

  We don’t know much about the gospels in my house. Churchgoing ain’t the type of thing that we’re likely to do. I remember going once when I was younger, but we didn’t go again. It was a bad time for us. The other churchgoers looked down on us. My sister said it was because our clothes weren’t as nice and clean as theirs were, but I thought that I looked just fine. That’s the last time I remember going, and that was a long time ago, like three or four years now. None of that matters, anyhow, because what I saw last night couldn’t be helped by no churchgoing. What I saw last night was stronger than that.

I had one of those dreams that I couldn’t escape. I kept waking up in a sweat, but every time I fell back asleep, I’d land back in hell. There was something dark down there that kept pulling me back in. I can’t quite explain it because it wasn’t no monster or nothing. It was just a bad feeling, I don’t know. But like a real bad feeling. It scared me shitless – I thought it wanted to hurt me. But it said it didn’t want to hurt me. It wanted me to hurt someone else.

Without speaking, it told me that I would meet Jesus tomorrow. It just put the ideas in my mind… like one of them aliens on the tv. It told me to gain Jesus’s trust and lead him to a spot in the desert, where it would be waiting. I am absolutely sure that is what it was trying to tell me, because every time I fell back into the dream, it would repeat the same message. I must have heard those instructions six- or seven-times last night! It just repeated them, over and over. I’m no stranger to nightmares but not like these. They felt too real. I didn’t feel right this morning, neither.

When I got to school and saw Jesus standing in the playground. I fell to my knees. I knew what I had to do.

 VIII

           At lunch, Jesús performed the miracle of feeding his entire school with only two loaves of bread and five fish. The following is a true account of how this came to be:

           Jesús entered the cafeteria followed by his disciples. A lunch man, totally distraught, threw himself before the feet of the Lord. He was in desperate need of help.

           “Young Jesus,” he said, “I do not know how or why you have come, but I am honored by your presence. Please, I beg of you: we need your help.”

           “What is it that you need of me, my elder?” Jesús was eager to help. There is a misconception of Jesus that he was able to predict the future, like a cheap psychic or any Jamaican person. Jesus was both god and the son of god, with emphasis on the word son. He was a man, and as such, experienced time in the same way we all do. Even though his spirit encompasses all moments and is free of time and space, Jesus as a man was restricted to the same bodily constraints that you and I are today. Jesus himself had less than ideal eyesight. It doesn’t really change anything, it’s just an interesting historical side note. That all goes to say, when Jesús asked a question of someone, he was genuinely curious.

           “A horrible mistake has been made and if we can’t fix it, the children will go hungry!”

           “We can’t have that,” said Jesús.

           All Jesús’s followers agreed as followers are wont to do.

           “We cannot, my Lord!,” continued the lunch man, “Instead of ordering two-thousand loaves of bread, someone accidentally left three zeroes off the order sheet and only ordered two loaves of bread. Then, instead of ordering five-hundred fish for Fish Sandwich Thursday, that same bozo only ordered five fish! Now we only have two loaves of bread and five fish to feed five-thousand children at Arizona’s largest elementary school! And you know what else? It was me! I was the bozo who ordered the numbers wrong! It was me! I confess!” The desperate lunch man presented Jesús with one fish and one loaf of bread, apparent evidence of his plea. He began to cry.

           Jesús (the boy) wasn’t sure what to do with this information. He took the fish in one hand and the loaf of bread in the other, looking at the two as if they were variables in some complex algebra equation where “x” is a fish and “y” is some bread. Jesús the boy didn’t know how to solve this equation, but he did know how to follow his heart. This is a true skill that is often overlooked: the ability to quiet noise and follow one’s instinct. Young Jesús possessed this skill and was prepared to use it.

           “Thank you for your faith, elder. I will see to it that all the children are fed,” said Jesús.

           “Incredible!” cried Matthew.

           “But how?” questioned Paul.

           “Do you have any gluten-free options?” asked Susie.

           “No!” responded the lunch man, “Fish Sandwich Thursday is a privilege, not a right! Now come, young savior, and we’ll get you dressed.”

           “As you wish.” Jesús followed the lunch man to the kitchen, where he was fitted for an apron and toque posthaste. Class by class, grade by grade, child by child – one by one, the school children lined up for lunch. Every single child received a fried fish sandwich that was out of this world. Susie even got her gluten-free option, which wasn’t Jesús’s best work, but he did the best he could given her dietary restraints. Sometimes there exists a trade-off between nutrition and flavor.

           All were in awe of this miracle. The apostle Tray told of Jesús’s miracles louder than anyone, encouraging all who could hear him to drop what they were doing and to follow.

           “You have witnessed his miracles! You have eaten his cooking! You have felt his love! Now follow him! He will lead us to a better life. I will follow him wherever he goes, even into the desert! Especially into the desert!”

           When every child and lunch lady was fed, Jesús joined his disciples for a fried fish sandwich. He looked around the table and saw that his followers were satisfied, but still had room for more. He distributed his own sandwich amongst them, divided equally, and felt led to speak.

           “Take my fried fish sandwich, for it is my body,” Jesús did not know what he was saying, or why, but continued, “Eat my body. Eat my body.”

           Weary of the repeated phrase, his followers ate his body. Seemingly from thin air, a Capri-Sun Pacific Cooler appeared next to each follower. They were instructed to drink it.

           “Drink this Capri-Sun, for it is my blood. Drink my blood. Drink my blood.”

           “Tastes like Jesús has diabetes,” cracked John, under his straw. He was promptly hushed by Susie. The followers ate Jesús’s crispy fried body and drank his sugary cold blood as he watched, apparently fasting. Nobody understood what was happening, but Tray and Jesús both felt that everything was going according to plan.

IX

           The school day concluded much like it started, with everyone in awe of Jesús. Of course, not everyone agreed with his message. Some were sad to see Jesús preach love because they themselves felt so much hate – these children became known as the “Sad-to-sees”, named such by none other than the Disciple Dylan, now using his name-calling powers for good. Some wanted to be fair to Jesús even though they didn’t agree with his message. They were dubbed the “Fair-a-sees” by a local dad who was keen on the joke.

           When Jesús left school, his followers followed. He felt a sense of unease about his path, but he was sure that he must continue. He hadn’t spoken since his final lunch, much to the alarm of his disciples. Tray, who by then had proven to be the most vocal of the bunch, walked alongside Jesús.

           “What’s wrong, great healer?” Tray asked, “You haven’t spoken since we ate you.”

           “I feel… a presence,” Jesús answered. Tray already felt that he knew this presence was the same one he felt the night before. Jesús continued, “I can’t quite explain it, but I am sure of two things: I am being lured towards this presence and that I should continue on my path.”

           “You’re being lured towards it… how do you know? Does it want to capture you?”

           “Yes, and… it wants to hurt me. It is waiting for me.”

           Tray had felt these feelings as well. Something shocked his heart, like an electric bee stinging his chest. He could not fathom the feeling then, but he felt bad for what he had done.

           “Well, you can still turn around,” Tray said, surprising himself. He continued, “If you feel like something is going to hurt you up ahead, we can just turn around. Wherever you lead, we will follow you. And if we gotta fight for ya, then we’ll fight.”

           “Thank you, my dear friend,” Jesús said, “But that won’t be necessary. This is what I must do. I do not know how I know it, but I am sure. Whatever challenges lie ahead of me, I am sure that, through love, I will overcome them.” Jesús’s sunglasses were particularly useful this afternoon, as the Arizona sun was relentless. Tray and Jesús then walked in silence with the rest of the disciples in tow.

           What happened next is difficult to explain. It was the same path that they always took home, but different. Susie noticed it first. Did they just pass the post office again? But how? Then John felt the heat. How long have they been out here? Isn’t this taking too long? Then even Paul started to doubt. “I am sure we’ve passed this corner before,” he thought, “this is probably the fourth time!”

           Indeed, Jesús had led them into a world that was not entirely their own. Without aging a moment, they walked through that stretch of desert for forty-days and forty-nights, passing the same landmarks over and over again. Tray continued to tempt Jesús into giving up his quest, but Jesús would not give in. He did not know how or why, but he was sure that he was where he was supposed to be.

           They had stepped into the Dimension of the Damned, a parallel reality spun by an angry demon as a death trap for Jesus. They walked, unable to stop, for a month and a half, until finally, they reached the end. It was like every other piece of Arizona real estate they’d ever seen before – dry, sandy, and vast. Yet it was completely unfamiliar to them all. The angry demon lay in wait just over the hills, ready to take advantage of a weakened Jesús.

 DIMENSION OF THE DAMNED

           The angry demon revealed himself from behind the hill. He was darkness incarnate and took on whatever form the viewer feared the most. He was like a fear electron in that he had no definite state until you looked at him. In this way, he was able to be anything you have ever feared. It was a truly terrifying experience for the children, except for the Jesús, who had learned to control his fears.

           “Well, well, well,” began the demon, “What do we have-”

           “Cut the shit, Casper.”            

           Everyone was stunned. What followed was an immaculately pregnant silence.

           “Is he not afraid?” Susie thought.

           “Can Jesus cuss?” wondered Dylan.

           “Who the fuck?” supposed the demon, and then said out loud, “Who the fuck do you think you are, twerp? I am Deimos, God of Fear! Now fear me!-” He was shocked to be cut off yet again.

           “Sup, D-bag? Are we gonna do this or what?”

           “Who taught you to speak like… I thought you couldn’t say those things!”

           “Fuck your mother, demon.”

           “Hail Satan, Jesus! Take it down a notch!”

           “I’m gonna take it up a notch. Up your mother’s butt.”

           “That’s it, Jesus! You have crossed the line! You wanna dance? Let’s dance!”

           Deimos charged Jesús and his disciples, who were paralyzed with fear. Only Tray was able to speak, but just barely. As Deimos began his wrathful charge, Tray managed to squeak out a question.

           “Aren’t… you…. Scared, my Lord?” he begged.

           Deimos, by then, was only a few precious moments away from destroying the Lord. Still, Jesús spoke with the confidence of a man under no pressure at all.

           “Why worry, my dude?” Jesús asked, “I’ve got fucking heat vision, baby.”

           “Nani?,” now even Tray was speaking in tongues.

           Jesús turned to Deimos and removed his sunglasses. A blast of holy energy more radiant and powerful than any nuclear bomb ever conceived by man burst forth like a heavenly cannon from the eye sockets of the one true living god. Deimos’s body, now taking on all forms of fear at all times, was launched like a small toy placed over an exploding fire hydrant. Deimos, who had no answer for this, was caught totally off guard and blown back through the panes of reality that separated the Dimension of the Damned from the real world. Jesús led his followers through the break in realities back to their home dimension, where the demon lay defeated. In his final form, the demon was small, ugly, and rodent-like. He didn’t look like something to fear, but rather something to pity. Something that was misunderstood. Jesús put his sunglasses back on.

           “You’ve got fucking heat vision,” said Tray.

           “Do you know where that heat comes from?” Jesus queried, “Does anyone know where that heat came from?”

           The disciples did not in fact know and murmured amongst themselves. Jesús quieted them again.

           “It comes from here,” he pointed to his chest, “It came from my heart. That heat was the power of love. Let that be a lesson to you all.”

           Without further explanation, Jesús turned and continued walking. Somehow, the disciples understood that they were not to continue following him, and none of them did. The demon disintegrated right before their very eyes and the hole between realities sewed itself shut. They stood in silence for quite some time before Dylan spoke.

           “So we’ve been able to cuss this whole fucking time?” asked Dylan.

           “I don’t know what the fuck is going on,” quoth Susie.

 XI

           Jesús arrived home that evening to find his mother María still resting where he had left her, sleeping like an angel. Jesús looked back on his day and sighed. He wondered if he had made Jesus proud. More than anything, he wanted to make Jesus proud. He performed many miracles. He taught his followers to love. He defeated fear incarnate with a love blast. He was sure Jesus would be proud. How could he not be?

           With that thought, Jesús finally, once and for all, felt at peace. A weight was lifted and Jesús fell into a deep, dark, and incredibly restful sleep.

 XII

           When Jesús awoke the next day, no dreams had disturbed his sleep. When he stepped out of bed, his feet actually touched the ground. He checked his face in the mirror and was satisfied to find only his eyes looking back at him, no shades in between. María made him his normal breakfast and went to work, unsure of why she felt so refreshed. Jesús took his normal route to school and nobody recognized him. Only Jesús could remember the day before. He was okay with that.

           He didn’t see Dylan at school at all that day and had lunch with Susie, John, and Paul. Normally, they all sat alone. For whatever reason, they felt compelled to eat with one another that day. They had a nice time and agreed to do it again.

           The final bell rung and Jesús walked home. Before turning the final turn home, under the hot Arizona sun, Jesús ran into Dylan.

           “Hey, Jesús”, Dylan said. He spoke like they were old friends.

           “What you doing?” asked Tray.

           “Just walking,” said Jesús.

           “Cool, cool,” said Dylan, “Mind if we walk with you?”

           Jesús smiled.

           “Sure.”

Tray, Dylan, and Jesús walked into the sunset like a holy trinity of friendship. For once, Arizona felt a little smaller.

[ineverhadmyinternetphase]

Running Into You - No. 6

Installment number 6 in my series of AU oneshots about Dan meeting his favourite youtuber AmazingPhil for the first time.

AO3 link

Genre: Fluff, with a sort of 2009-ish feel (but it’s still AU)

Warnings: A bit of swearing and some mentions of low self-esteem but literally it’s just fluff

Prompt: Missent Text

Summary: Dan’s on his gap year, so naturally he’s spending most of his time lounging around on the internet, watching his favourite youtubers and scrolling through tumblr. When he gets an accidental text from an unknown number, he doesn’t think much of it, until a series of events start to convince him the sender might just be someone he idolises: AmazingPhil.

A/N: This draft is like 2 years old, but @agingphangirl convinced me to post this while we’re waiting for pinof. It’s epistolary form, so I hope it isn’t too confusing. Hope you like it ^_^

Phil’s texts are italics, Dan’s texts are in quotation marks

…

6. Missent Text

Where r u?

Sorry what?

Where r u I’ve been here 10 mins

…Am I supposed to be somewhere?

You said on dm you’d be here at 6, I’m getting cold ^_^

Um I’m sorry mate but you must have the wrong number

Oh crap!! Sorry!!

.Lmao it’s ok. Just checked my dms and nothing interesting enough to make me be outside in this weather sorry

Tell me about it x_x I’m freezing. But if you’re not peej then I’ll be here a while

Unfortunately for you I go by Dan

Oh. Well, hello Dan. Sorry for bothering you with my freezing antics

Nvm it’s cool

It’s more than COOL, it’s COLD enough for ICICLES

I’m sure ur exaggerating

No my nose is an actual block of ice

Where even are you? Unless you’re in the Arctic you might want to get that seen to

--

Sorry! Peej showed up eventually (the friend I thought you were). Turns out he gave me the wrong number. All sorted now. I promise not to bother you again

Honestly it’s fine. I probably need more human contact so you did me a favour

Haha, glad to be of service ^_^ also I was in Manchester. It’s so cold it snowed. My icicle nose is allowed

Manchester? That’s like waaaaay in the north

Not that far but cold enough for icicle noses :P

Yes yes ok you’re allowed an icicle nose

Haha thanks :P so where are you, if not in the north?

Reading

Ohhhh so a proper southerner

I guess you could say that

Well hello Dan the proper southerner

God no that makes me sound like a queens guard or something

Do you queens guard people have time to text?

We’re too busy dealing with the corgis and all that shit

I knew it 0.o

XD but really I’m sitting in bed on the internet lol

Actually same

Haha really?

Yep. Which sites you on?

Just the usual. Tumblr, YouTube. My favourite youtuber has a new video due out tonight

Nice ^_^

What sites are you on?

Currently uploading a video to my YouTube channel

You have a channel?!

Haha yeah ^_^

Which one? Would I know it?

I don’t know. It isn’t a huge deal but it’s fun

Yeah I mean I admire that. I’d love to have a channel

Why don’t you?

Idk too scared I guess

Awr ^_^ nothing to be scared about honest, it’s just you and a camera

And the whole of the internet xD

Haha I try not to think about that part 0.o thousands of people watching me

Thousands? Wow so you must be a pretty big channel

Heh I guess, maybe ^_^ so who are your favourite youtubers?

Oh man I have loads XD Smosh, community channel, AmazingPhil (the one I’m waiting for the new video), charlieissocoollike

That’s a good mix ^_^ my new video is 99% uploaded and stuck there x_x

Seriously? Your connection needs to sort its shit out

Haha yeah it really does. I think it’s being attacked by bees

Bees?

Or wasps

Seriously?

Tiny horned beetles?

Do they even exist?

Idk but if they do they’re attacking my wifi

I’ll send the insect spray

Haha thanks XD it must have worked as my video is finally uploaded!

—

…Great video. Especially the lion wedding, that was sweet

Haha thanks! Glad you liked it, took ages to get the dress on lioness. Plus my mum nearly walked in on me 0.o

Holy fuck you actually are AmazingPhil aren’t you

Um, well, yes.

Sorry.

AmazingPhil, FantasticPhil, Epic Youtuber

or just Phil if you prefer

I probably should have told you

Jesus shitting fuck I’m sorry for bothering you

Don’t be daft! I accidentally texted you first ^_^

Yeah but I bet you didn’t expect to end up with a weird fanboy. Um. Not that I’m a stalker I promise

Haha it’s ok Dan honestly

I’m not going to spread your number around or anything holy shit like I’m so sorry

Honestly, please don’t worry, it’s been nice talking to you ^_^ I appreciate you not spreading my number around though. I got lucky with you, don’t want to risk a creepy stalker finding me 0.o

Lmao I promise xD how do you know for sure I’m not a creepy stalker though

0.o I’ll set the bees against you

I’ll start running now

Haha

—

So out of curiosity how long have you been watching my videos for?

Oh um a couple of years now

Really? That’s awesome!

Yeah. You actually replied to one of my comments once ^_^ made my day

Aw haha that’s great, which video?

The toxic one

Oh my god >.<

Haha it’s a good video :P

I should remove it from the internet immediately

Don’t you dare! Your fans would be sad

X_x well this isn’t very fair if you know about me but I don’t know you at all

Well you know my name’s Dan

And you’re from Reading. Tell me more? ^_^

unless you don’t want to, that’s fine, I’m just curious

Haha no it’s alright. Um. I’m Dan. I just finished my A levels and now I’m taking a gap year

Oh cool ^_^ going to uni after that?

Probably. Thinking of law

Wow, that’s impressive

Haha we’ll see ^_^

Just checking but how old are you? I don’t want to be a creep 0.o

Lmao dw I’m 18 everything is legal

Phew XD Anything else I should know?

Well I’m currently undefeated at mario kart

What seriously? You’ve never lost?

Nope and I don’t plan to start :P

I’d beat you

I really wish we could test that theory

Haha that would be fun :P we could always test it over Skype sometime?

That’s probably really weird sorry

I promise I’m not a creeper

It’s ok, and yeah, I’d love to Skype sometime

Yeah? Yay! :D

Lmao you’re probably going to want to run a mile when you see me though

I doubt that very much unless you have like five eyes or something

Five eyes? Wtf XD

Idk you could be a giant spider

[insert pic] See? Not a giant spider :P

Oh wow yeah not a giant spider. I spy a cute guy :P

Shut up >.<

Nice hair

Lol I swear I had it like this before I started watching you

[insert pic] And here I thought I’d started a trend

Crap you actually are Phil >.< yeah your hair is cool enough to be a trendsetter tbh

Haha thanks XD and yeah I am Phil. Is that a problem?

Are you kidding me? Nope except I turn even more awkward than normal around people I admire

Aw well awkward people are the best. And at least there aren’t videos of you half-naked on the internet

You make a good point

—

Hey so I’m uploading a new video tonight but I can’t decide if it’s actually any good. Check it out for me?

Omfg are you seriously saying I get a sneak preview on an AmazingPhil video

Yes please ^_^ I might have overweirded. Need a second opinion

Omfg

just like

give me a moment

wtf

fucking hell

wow ok

I’m calm now

yes I would love to check your video for you

Haha thanks. It’s up as unlisted, [insert link] please be honest with me if it’s terrible

Wow man that’s awesome! I love how interactive it is!

Omfg seriously how are you this creative like you shouldn’t be allowed

Haha really? Wow thanks, I’m not sure about the shot angle though and the lighting is kinda terrible

Yeah ngl the lighting is bad but you can’t control the sun

You never know! I could be a weatherman. But you seriously think I should upload it?

[insert pic with thumbs up] totally I love it

Aw I forgot how hot you are. It’s going up tonight then

CUTE I MEANT CUTE

Gah I’m sorry

Haha it’s fine, getting called hot is never bad in my book ;)

Would you believe it was autocorrect?

Haha if you want :P sounds pretty unlikely though

I’m hiding in a pillow and never coming out

No! Then your subscribers will hate me for taking you away

[insert pic in a pillow] do you like my new home

XD don’t hide from me seriously like you have a video to upload

[insert pic] ok true it’s on 68%

Damn YouTube upload times

Tell me about it. Have you ever uploaded a video then?

Lmao there’s one of me being a boss at DDR

Yeah? Can I check it out?

>.< Um sure, I’m a lame nerd though

Dan, have you even met me?

Haha ok true :P [insert link] just don’t say I didn’t warn you

No one’s feet should be allowed to move that fast. You’re so good, I fall over whenever I try and play

Haha I could teach you

Please be my DDR master Dan-sensei

Depends what you give me :P

I’ve got Pokemon cards

I’m sold

—

[insert pikachu with a lion pic] this was too cute not to show you

Awwww! Rawr ^_^ where is that?

Shop called forbidden planet. I’m in London on work experience and went there on my break

0.o London? You’re braver than me, capital cities scare me

Aw poor Phil haha

[insert pic] do I look ready for work?

Very serious

Srs bsns

[insert scared face pic] I’ll take YouTube any day

Haha. Me too tbh. Law offices are big and dull

Why do you want to do it then?

Idk. Job security? Having a point in life?

Fair enough :P

You did English didn’t you? Sorry I swear I’m not a stalker

Haha it’s fine ^_^ and yeah, English language and linguistics. Then a masters in post-production

Wow that’s so cool. So you’re in your 20s?

22 ^_^ My masters is the only reason I know how to edit videos :P

I wish I could

Well I can always teach you

Seriously?!

Yeah of course, I reckon you’d be great at making videos

Really? Lmao I’m so awkward tho

That can work in your favour, trust me :P

Haha well if you say so, YouTube senpai

Listen well Dan-kun and you too will learn the ways of the YouTube

Haha you’re so strange

You’re just jealous

[insert pic] so much

Stop taking pics at work

But it’s so boring. At least send me one back, save me from the dullness

[insert pic] on my way to a meetup so might be a bit slow

Oh cool meetup like YouTube meetup?

I guess that must be fun

I’d love to go to one but too scared and awkward lol

Save me work is literally killing me

I can’t actually keep working here

ugh why did I ever think law was a good idea I’m going to die at uni

Whoops sorry I seem to have spammed your phone

—

Hey Dan, sorry! I forgot to bring my charger to the meetup so my phone has only just come back to me. I mourned it’s passing *plays lion king music*

Oh that’s ok

I really am sorry that I couldn’t distract you from your work

Lmao no worries

Don’t know if it’ll make it any better but I am working on a new video and lion says he thinks law is a very admirable career option

Tell lion thanks and I’d be even more grateful if he did my degree for me

He says sign him up where are you going to uni anyway?

Well I’m not there yet. I have to start applying soon

Looked around any?

Errrr I’ll get on that

Isn’t the deadline soon?

Yeah but I’m an epic procrastinator

Lion is very disappointed

Lion can suck my dick

Dan!

Lmao I was kidding

XD

besides you’re 18 you have loads of time to sort stuff out

Yeah but I have literally no idea what I’m doing

No one does. That’s why you go to uni - to figure it out

You seemed to have it all together

Haha thanks, but honestly, I was just making stupid videos in my bedroom

does that sound wrong?

Lmao a little yeah

Oops

Dw lol if you’re a sexual predator you’re a bit far away to do any real damage

True

:( I’d rather you were nearer tbh

Even if I’m a sexual predator?

Lol I don’t really think you are though

Well I’m not

And me too, Dan

—

[insert pic] last day at the office today I literally couldn’t be happier

Lol I can see from your face

[insert pic] is it that obvious

Rawr

I’ll send lioness to aid you

Lioness not lion?

She’s much fiercer

Lmao probs true either way I’ll take help

At least soon you’ll be free

Yeah I literally can’t wait

Gonna do something to celebrate? ^_^

Lol all my friends are at uni

[insert pic] well Lion and I are proud of you

Aw thanks ^_^ I still forget you’re AmazingPhil sometimes

I’m deeply offended

no but really I’m just Phil and you’re really cool

sorry

Na it’s fine I just had to work

Oops XD

I’m hiding out in the toilets now so we’re fine lmao

and I have no issues with you being Phil

I mean it could be worse at least you aren’t a creepy stalker

I hope not. Also uploading another video tonight, I think you’ll like it

!!! Best celebration ever

^_^

—

So I may have been stalking you on Twitter and it seems your birthday is soon?

0.o stalker. And yeah it is ^_^

wait you follow me? What’s your Twitter handle?

Um. Yes I follow you. And this is going to sound very awkward and stuff but I kind of want to send you a birthday present

Omg Dan you don’t have to do that

Well I’d kinda like to so :P should I use your PO box?

Nah that takes ages to check, I’ll give you my actual address

I promise not to hunt you down

Tbh if it’s you I wouldn’t even mind

Omg

[insert pic with address] there you go

Lol is that a bank statement?

Yeah I’m so profesh

Phil! I could literally rob you

Well I trust that you won’t :P

Lmao you’d better

What’s your Twitter handle btw? You never said

Uh its danisnotonfire.

But please don’t judge me oh god I’m such a nerd

Dan honestly you’re the coolest person I know

sorry was that a bit much?

No! I’m just struggling to respond to the best youtuber out there calling me cool

Not just cool, the coolest :P wow you’ve commented on my tweets quite a bit

>.<

Sorry I never noticed you properly

You accidentally texted me I think that wins

Haha true

—

Happy birthday!

Thanks! ^_^ I have family stuff but I’ll talk to you as soon as I’m done

Sure sure have a great day!

— DAN OMG

YOUR PRESENTS

YOU SHOULDN’T HAVE YOU ACTUALLY SHOULDN’T

[insert excited pic cuddling the presents] you’re amazing

you’re so amazing

I can’t believe you

honestly you’re too amazing

how did I ever meet someone this nice and funny and cool and kind and cute and sweet

honestly

and I know you must be sleeping it’s like 2am but I have to tell you

OMG you’re too adorable

who let you be like this and you’re too far away :(

I wish you could be here so I could give you a thank-you hug

Wow I’m glad you liked them :P I’ll take a thank-you hug

What are you doing still up?

Can’t sleep how was the party?

GR8 M8! My parents embarrassed me in front of everyone

Oh no what did they do?

Got the baby photos out >.<

Lmao I’d love to see that

I was ginger

OMG for real?!

Yes >.< *hides forever*

That’s adorable

You’re adorable

Your mum’s adorable

Actually shut up

:P aren’t you too old for immature arguments now

Go to sleep

Lmao I’m glad it was good though

Thanks yeah it was rly good

Looking through the photos now

Any good ones?

Mostly drunk XD [insert pic]

Who’s that guy?

My cousin

Lmao ok I was about to say hands off

XD he was really drunk

You look a bit worse for the wear too

I may be slightly intoxicated

Haha tut tut Lester

Shut up Dan :P what is your surname?

Howell

Howell? Like a wolf?

Lmao if you like

Awooooooo

You’re so strange XD

AwoloooooOooooOOOOO

it suits you though

you’re very brown

XD aren’t wolves grey?

Well yeah

but like

you have their wildness

Lmao I’m taking that as a compliment

You should

you’re hot as hell

but so young and sticky out

like a baby deer

A wolf and a baby deer?

And eyes like an owl

You and your animal metaphors

None of those are quite right though

Like your eyes are too pretty they’re more like the night sky

but coloured with earth

You’re drunk

I mean it though

…I know

I wish I had eyes like yours

No! Yours are perfect

They’re big and weird

They’re deep and beautiful and I could swim in them all day

and I’m not drunk

I should be sleeping

You’re sleep-drunk :P which is actually a thing you know

Right I’m going to sleep

Noooooooo

We’ll talk about this when we’re both more sane

But I don’t want you to go

it’s quiet and sad when you aren’t around

and I’m cold here now

and it’s my birthday

Dan?

Dan?

Happy birthday you idiot. Now go to sleep

night Dan <333

—

I’m so sorry about last night I had too much to drink

Haha it’s ok it was your birthday

Yeah but still

I’m so sorry if I made you uncomfortable

You didn’t. There’s nothing to worry about

Do we need to talk about this?

Um. Do you want to?

Kind of

But kind of not

I don’t want to make you feel awkward

I’m always awkward

Dan, for real. You know what I mean.

Yeah I think I do

Do we need to talk about it?

I think we’re both aware it’s there. Let’s just see where it goes?

Yeah ok sounds good. And no awkwardness?

None at all, I promise <3

Good <3

—

Hey Dan, are you still up for Skype at some point?

Yeah, sure ^_^ tonight?

Yeah! I’ll just finish up editing

Ooh, what’s it like?

Haha spoilers :P what’s your Skype name?

Danisnotonfire same as Twitter

Original :P

added you

‘AmazingPhil has added you to his contacts’ you’re just as original I see

Shut up and answer the call

—

So my eyes are even bluer on skype? :P

Haha shuddup

They’re even more blue in person

Are they even blue lmao they’re like 3 different colours

[insert pic] mostly blue

Greeny yellow blue

Very poetic

Shuddup :P

sorry I’ll stop

Please don’t

Lol fishing for compliments?

Well if they’re being offered

You’re impossible

That isn’t a compliment

You’re ridiculously strange?

I’ll take that

Haha of course you would :P

So what are you up to?

Actually answering a few texts for once, you?

Throwing around some video ideas but I’m bored now. Who’re you texting?

Some school friends who are at uni

Nice ^_^

Well. Sort of. It’s weird

Tell me about it?

It’s just they all have these lives that are moving forwards and away from home and leaving me behind

and I just

My ex is dating someone else and I’m in exactly the same place as I was when she broke up with me

And I’m not content but I don’t really want to go anywhere or do anything and I just don’t know what on earth I’m going to do with my life

Were you happy with them before school ended?

Idk. I thought so at the time. But I don’t think I’ve ever really been happy, not yet

It’s ok. You don’t have to know right now. And one day you’ll leave all of them behind too and move on to something better

I think I already am. Having you around is better than them

Sorry

Haha don’t apologise for being so sweet ^_^

Also I’m single now. And bi. Just to avoid confusion

I’m bi too. Probably

Probably?

Not a massive fan of labels if I’m honest

If I feel something for someone then that’s all that matters

Might be demi, might be bi, might be somewhere inbetween.

And I don’t want you to worry about your future, ok? Everything is going to fall into place

<3

And if it doesn’t I’ll be around to distract you with more lame animal comparisons

Haha I actually love you

Me too <3

—

Get on Skype!

Ok it’s late you’re probably sleeping

it’s just

ugh I don’t know who else to talk to so I’m going to rant at your phone like a completely normal person

but mum yelled at me for not doing my uni application yet

but I just don’t know what to do I mean law yes but how do I decide where?

This is huge

and I don’t want to rush into it

but she thinks I’m going to miss the deadline though there’re months left

and I just

ugh

now she isn’t talking to me

-

Dan I’m sorry I was sleeping. Skype now?

I really don’t mind you spamming my phone, please do, always, I’d rather you had somewhere to talk about this stuff

And you know, Manchester uni is good. I could show you around

—

I spoke to mum about going to look around the uni.

She asked where I would stay.

I kind of told her I have friends at uni there.

It’s a half truth right?

Awesome ^_^ Um do you think she’d like to know the truth?

Probably.

Idk.

She might freak out and be worried

Because you’re meeting a random man you’ve never met before?

Lmao when you put it like that

Are you honestly ok with this? It’s fine if you’re not

No no I’m so ok. I want to meet you. Like properly

I want that too. So much

So it’s going to happen. I’m buying train tickets

Awesome ^_^ but your mum?

Do you think I should tell her?

I think she’d be happier knowing where you are

Yeah. Yeah I know. I’ll talk to her

Give her my phone number too. And my address

Lmao you after more stalkers?

Dan I’m serious I want you to be safe

You spoon

yeah I’ll tell her everything. She might not be best pleased though

Dw if she locks you up I’ll come rescue you

<3

<3

—

I told her

!!! And?

She said yes

OMG!!!!! I’m out atm but Skype as soon as I get back?

Yes please :P

[insert happy pic]

[insert happy pic]

—

Hey Dan you should make a YouTube channel before you visit me

?? Really?

Yeah I mean you always say you want to. And we could do a collab ^_^

For serious?!

Yeah! I mean, if you want to

I’ve been wanting to do a Q and A for a while and it would be fun I think

Omfg

Is that a yes?

Hell yes it’s a yes

Um only problem is

How do I even make a video?

However you want ^_^ you’ve told me loads of good ideas

But they’re so lame lmao

They’re really not. I promise.

Why not start with an introduction? Then you can go on to your actual content

Omg but like do you really think I could?

Honestly! Yes.

Ok

Ok

My mum’s going out in a minute so I’ll have the house to myself. I could film

That’s brilliant! I’m about to head out with mum but film whilst I’m gone and we can Skype later yeah?

Ok wow

omg

ok

Phil this isn’t working I sound so stupid

fucking hell I can’t do this

You can! Act like you’re on Skype to me

Can we Skype?

Still visiting my brother sorry :( tonight we will

Ok. I’ll keep trying

You can do it! Pretend the camera is me. Or any friend. It’ll help

Ok <3

<3

—

Holy fuck Phil I have views.

And subscribers! So many subscribers!

Told you!!

This is because you tweeted it

No, it’s because you’re really bloody talented

>.< I can’t believe I did that

You did and you’re awesome and I’m so proud of you!

Can’t wait to collab :D

Me neither, if you still want to I mean

Silly, of course I want to. Best thing about this month

<3

<3

—

Um so a bit of a change of plan

??? Do I need to cancel the train tickets?

No no! Just

Turns out my parents aren’t going to be here the weekend you’re visiting.

Is that a problem?

Lmao no why would it be

are you planning to ravish me or something

>.< I don’t think I’ve ever ravished anything in my life

Well you can start with me ;)

Dan!

Seriously though. Is it ok?

Yeah. Honestly it’s great.

Are you sure?

Are you?

Yeah I mean honestly it’ll be nicer to see you without having to get around them

I just don’t want to weird you out

You won’t

I hope not

Phil honestly I can’t wait

:D me neither

where are you btw? Skype isn’t picking up

Oh yeah, my internet is down, sorry

:O no wifi?!

No wifi. I’m not sure how I’m going to survive

I’ll spam you with texts

Please!

Actually I have something better

[incoming call: AmazingPhil]

—

I’m at the train station and it’s super early I’m not even sure you’re worth it

Sorry! I’ll make it up to you with hot coffee and hugs ^_^

Ok yeah you are worth it

Aw :D

On the train next to an old man who’s threatening to fall asleep on my shoulder

x_X tell him to keep his hands off

Lmao yeah I’m sure you’d really sort him out

I could be fierce

You’re literally a muffin with an emo fringe

I’ll fill your bag with bees

I’ll tame them into my own personal army

Then you’ll be our evil overlord

Mwahahaha

Can I be on your side when you take over the world?

Your lion powers could come in useful so yeah I guess so

Awesome we can run the world together

Yes :P

ugh the train is running late

:( by how much?

Twenty minutes atm

I’ll still get to the station at ten to

Well it might be running quite late by the time we get that far north

I don’t want to miss you. I’ll be there <3

I can’t wait

Me neither

Stuck in Stoke now. Literally the weirdest station I’ve ever seen

Haha really?

Yeah. And it’s packed. I had no idea this many people travelled this early on a Saturday, I didn’t even know this time exists

It doesn’t and you’re travelling in some other dimension right now

Shut up :P

Just waved my parents off. I’ll head out to the station soon

I’m so nervous

Me too <3

Promise you won’t run a mile?

Promise. I’ll see you soon Dan

See you soon

—        

[liliumwallichianum]

finna ask myself these cause nobody else will

ASK ME THINGS

*SO I started writing these a long time ago and never finished them so I’m gonna just add all my answers (06/04/2017) in bold enjoy neethz

***EDIT AGAIN this is so wild... 3 years later.... I was so depressed, hated my relationship clearly, and hated myself? Writing on 4/10/2020 and starting at #49 first pass so I can actually finish and publish lol.

1. You woke up naked next to the last person you texted, what would you say?

typical @richiericherson; good morning lol 

2. What’s going on between you and the last person you kissed?

4months datin; wow! 6 months dating :) 

3. If your boyfriend or girlfriend was into drugs, would you care?

is this a joke? we’re both into them it’s coo; same answer as previous :) 

4. Is your last name longer than six letters?

yee; same

5. Was your last kiss drunk or sober?

sober; same

6. Have you ever wanted to have someone but you messed it up?

oh yeah HAHAHA; have i though? 

7. What does your last received text say?

“yes”; have fun studying

8. How many times have you kissed the last person you kissed?

a million and one; and a million more

9. Where was your last kiss at?

in ma bifs bed; my bed this time surprise surprise

10. When is the last time you saw your sister?

today morning her bitchass lives w me ; 40 min ago... still live w her bitchass

11. What do you drink in the morning?

water, a smoothie; coffee. ugh the deprogression 

12. Where did you sleep last night?

my bifs; my bed

13. Do you think relationships are hard?

hardest; shouldnt be but they are

14. If you could go back and change something in the past 5 months, would you?

yeah probably work a little harder at the end of last semester; idk a lot i feel but i cant look back specifically and pick things out. i would change almost everything if i could

15. You’re locked in a room with the last person you kissed, any problems?

no that would be perfect; yeah we’d just hella yell at each other

16. Would you rather it be sunny or rainy?

both but sunny; both but rainy :/ 

17. Do you know anyone with the same middle name as you?

my sister; same

18. Are you wearing jeans,sweatpants,or pajama pants?

pajama shorts; joggers

19. Do you think you will be in a relationship 3 years from now?

probably; yeah 

20. Does anyone like you?

yee i hope so ; yeah

21. Have you ever kissed someone with a name that starts with an S?

ummm lemme check.. yup 2 people!; still 2 hahah

22. Is the last person you kissed gay?

no hahaha; sometimes lol

23. Is there a person you CANNOT stand?

not really there’s all love here; that dunt from hs lol

24. Have you ever considered getting a tattoo?

yeah just let sarah give me one; can’t believe it’s been 2 months

25. In the past week have you cried?

yeah im weirdly pmsing or im depressed cant tell which; LMFAOOOOOOOO IM SO PREDICTABLE. literally sitting here crying... still dont know if it’s pms or depression 

26. What breed was the last dog you saw?

golden :) great dane

27. Do you dry off in the shower or out of the shower?

out out out; out

28. Have you ever kissed a football player?

no i wish; still wish but tbh i probably have

29. Do you think you’re old?

not at all; TOO OLD BUT TOO YOUNG IDK

30. Do you like text messaging?

not at all; grown to like or tolerate ig

31. What type of day are you having?

stressful cause orgo quiz soon and i know nothing; a normal day. 

32. Have you ever thought about getting your nose pierced?

already have it pierced!; sameee

33. Do you prefer warm or cold weather?

cold i think; cold ? ugh idk 

34. Is there a person of the opposite sex who means a lot to you?

yes my bf; my dad.

35. Would you prefer a relationship or a fling?

idk about this one tbh.... probably relationship; relationship 

36. Are you a simple or complicated person?

both; i try honestly i try

37. What song are you listening to?

none; redemption

38. When you say you’re sorry do you mean it?

mostly no... lol i say sorry to ease the situation; nah 39. Is there a girl that knows everything or almost everything about you?

not even close lol 40. What made you start liking the person you like now?

i was lonely.. peer pressure...  41. When did you last receive a text message?

like just now 42. What is wrong with you right now?

idk i want it to stop though. i want overall sadness to stop . 

43. How well do you know the last female you texted?

p well she’s one of my bffs at wayne 44. Does anyone disgust you?

yea fam almost everyone lol 45. Would you date someone right now if they asked?

no considering i have a bf 46. Are you in a good mood right now?

i wish  47. Who was the last person you talked to in person?

simran  48. What color shirt are you wearing?

black. did u even think differently ?  49. Has someone recently told you something you didn’t want to hear?

Probably something bout swap 50. Anyone you’re giving up on? Tryin to give up on swap, giving up on Frank

51. Do you hate the person you fell hardest for?

Yes.

52. Have you ever thought about giving up on someone but couldn’t?

Swap? Def DONT want him back but can’t let him go 53. Do you like rain?

Yes 54. Do you care if your boyfriend/girlfriend drinks?

No unless they’re crazy on it aka swap 55. Have you ever liked somebody and never told them?

Probably 56. Do you like to cuddle?

So much..... with Y only 57. Are you shy?

Nah 58. Do you get along with girls?

Yes! I think 59. Have you dated the person you texted last?

No... well kinda? I guess I’ve dated Alex 60. What do you carry with you at all times?

Chapstick, my animal print scrunchie 61. If you were paid 1 million dollars to spend the night in a supposed haunted house, would you?

Yeah 62. Do you think you can last in a relationship for five months?

Yes 63. Think back to October, were you in a relationship?

Unfortunately 64. The person you like kisses you on the forehead, do you find this cute?

Yas 65. Did anything “cute” happen in the last week?

Yeah, all the boys I’m talking to supporting me lol

66. How old are the last three people you kissed?

23/22, 28, 24?

67. Would you rather pay to get your nails done or do them yourself?    

Pay 68. Which do you like better- Zebra print or leopard print?    

Leopard 69. Do you have any stickers on your car?    

Hell no 70. Would you rather listen to Luke Bryan or Lil Wayne?    

Weezy f baby 71. Blackberry, Anroid, or iPhone?    

Android ugh miss mine 72. When’s the last time you had pizza from Pizza Hut?    

Wowwwwwww probably the last year 73. Do you like diet soda?    Nah 74. What color are the walls in your room?    Blue w stars 75. Are you 16 or older?    Yes 76. Do you watch Pretty Little Liars?    I used to 77. Do you have a job?    Yes being a Med Student   78. What are your initials?    NUS 79. Did you ever have braces?    Nope 80. Are you from the south?    Yup south INDIA

81. What does your last status on facebook say?   Supporting Michelle and sharing her article   82. Do you still talk to the first person you ever kissed?    No lmfao Meiyan 83. Are you closer to your mom or your dad?     Probs mom

84. Have you ever done cheerleading or gymnastics?    No 85. What’s the last movie you saw in theaters?    Ugh idek something w swap? 86. Do you smoke?    Yes 87. Would you rather wear heels or flip flops?    Flip 88. Is your phone touch screen?    Yes 89. Do you normally wear your hair straight or curly?   Wavey  90. Have you ever snuck out of your house?    Hell yeah 91. Would you rather swim in a river, lake, or pool?    Lake 92. Have you ever made out in a car?    Yes 93. …Had sex in a car?    Yesssss best sex ever ugh 94. Are you single or in a relationship?    Single 95. What were you doing last night at midnight?    Sleeping 96. When’s the last time you saw fireworks?    July 4? 97. Do you like the camera on your phone?    No 98. Have you ever had a friend with benefits?    Yes 99. Have you ever passed out from drinking?    Yes 100. Are you friends with people on facebook that you actually hate?    Yes 101. Have you ever had a pregnancy scare?    Yes 102. Name your favorite Kesha song:    Bro no 103. Do you have any tan lines right now?    Yes kinda 104. Would you ever wear cowboy boots with shorts? Yeah if I was going to faster horses lmaoo    

[meepface]

i’m avoiding an essay

1. You woke up naked next to the last person you texted, what would you say?

it was my girlfriend so that would be very nice

2. What’s going on between you and the last person you kissed?

we are daaaating and we might get some time to hang out after classes tomorrow so i’m really looking forward to that

3. If your boyfriend or girlfriend was into drugs, would you care?

as long as it’s not anything bad 

4. Is your last name longer than six letters?

yes

5. Was your last kiss drunk or sober?

sober

6. Have you ever wanted to have someone but you messed it up?

yes

7. What does your last received text say?

“i’m having a day. how’s your day been?”

8. How many times have you kissed the last person you kissed?

sooooo many

9. Where was your last kiss at?

in my car in a parking lot right outside of campus

10. When is the last time you saw your sister?

i don’t have a sister but i saw my brother like 20 mins ago

11. What do you drink in the morning?

water, coffee, milk, mostly coffee

12. Where did you sleep last night?

my bed

13. Do you think relationships are hard?

they shouldn’t be but they definitely require effort, but the effort is worth it so it still shouldn’t be hard??

14. If you could go back and change something in the past 5 months, would you?

nah, i don’t see a point in it. everything happens for a reason

15. You’re locked in a room with the last person you kissed, any problems?

nope that would be nice bc we’d finally have some fuckin time to ourselves

16. Would you rather it be sunny or rainy?

rainy but only if i have company and something to do

17. Do you know anyone with the same middle name as you?

yes it’s a very common middle name

18. Are you wearing jeans,sweatpants,or pajama pants?

jeans 

19. Do you think you will be in a relationship 3 years from now?

i hope so yes

20. Does anyone like you?

yes i’d hope my girlfriend does

21. Have you ever kissed someone with a name that starts with an S?

nope

22. Is the last person you kissed gay?

yes lmfaooo

23. Is there a person you CANNOT stand?

yep

24. Have you ever considered getting a tattoo?

i have three lmfao i’ve more than just considered it

25. In the past week have you cried?

yuhhh i cried yesterday

26. What breed was the last dog you saw?

my lil dog Rusty is a pomeranian mix

27. Do you dry off in the shower or out of the shower?

in ??

28. Have you ever kissed a football player?

no

29. Do you think you’re old?

no

30. Do you like text messaging?

yeah

31. What type of day are you having?

i’m really tired and i’ve felt sick but otherwise it’s been a really nice day

32. Have you ever thought about getting your nose pierced?

yes lmao

33. Do you prefer warm or cold weather?

cold

34. Is there a person of the opposite sex who means a lot to you?

yes there’s a few

35. Would you prefer a relationship or a fling?

relationship

36. Are you a simple or complicated person?

i try to be simple but i always complicate shit lmao so

37. What song are you listening to?

i’m not listening to music but i do have make daddy proud by blackbear stuck in my head lmfao

38. When you say you’re sorry do you mean it?

yes

39. Is there a girl that knows everything or almost everything about you?

yes pretty much

40. What made you start liking the person you like now?

she’s really funny and sweet and has a cute laugh and she’s so pretty and dorky and she was also one of my only gay friends in high school lmfao and we bonded so hard over that. i felt like it was only a matter of time that we got together

41. When did you last receive a text message?

9:57 pm but i haven’t texted anyone back since lmao

42. What is wrong with you right now?

i mean generally speaking there’s a lot going on but just currently i am feeling very sick and sleepy and i should probably work on my essay lmao

43. How well do you know the last female you texted?

very very well she’s my girlfriend

44. Does anyone disgust you?

yep

45. Would you date someone right now if they asked?

no i have a girlfriend

46. Are you in a good mood right now?

yes

47. Who was the last person you talked to in person?

my brother 

48. What color shirt are you wearing?

grey

49. Has someone recently told you something you didn’t want to hear?

yes

50. Anyone you’re giving up on?

yes

51. Do you hate the person you fell hardest for?

no i am dating her

52. Have you ever thought about giving up on someone but couldn’t?

yes

53. Do you like rain?

yes as long as i have company and something to do or else i get depressoooo

54. Do you care if your boyfriend/girlfriend drinks?

nope as long as she’s safe

55. Have you ever liked somebody and never told them?

yes

56. Do you like to cuddle?

yessssss so much

57. Are you shy?

not shy just introverted

58. Do you get along with girls?

yes!!! i love girls

59. Have you dated the person you texted last?

yes

60. What do you carry with you at all times?

chapstick, my phone, medicine bc a bitch gets migraines all the damn time

61. If you were paid 1 million dollars to spend the night in a supposed haunted house, would you?

as long as i had company

62. Do you think you can last in a relationship for five months?

yes lmao?? i already have

63. Think back to October, were you in a relationship?

yes

64. The person you like kisses you on the forehead, do you find this cute?

yes but she’s short so that would be a struggle for her

65. Did anything “cute” happen in the last week?

yes my gf and i finally got to go out since we’ve both been busy as hell and it was so nice

66. How old are the last three people you kissed?

i have only ever kissed my gf and she is 20

67. Would you rather pay to get your nails done or do them yourself?    

pay bc i am bad at it lmfao

68. Which do you like better- Zebra print or leopard print?    

leopard

69. Do you have any stickers on your car?    

no

70. Would you rather listen to Luke Bryan or Lil Wayne?    

neither

71. Blackberry, Android, or iPhone?    

iphone

72. When’s the last time you had pizza from Pizza Hut?    

it’s been months lmao

73. Do you like diet soda?    

no (sorry Caitlin)

74. What color are the walls in your room?    

one is brown and the others are a bright blue

75. Are you 16 or older?    

yes

76. Do you watch Pretty Little Liars?    

no

77. Do you have a job?    

yes

78. What are your initials?    

ENM

79. Did you ever have braces?    

yes....... don’t remind me i wanted to kill myself when i had them i was so ugly lol! anyway

80. Are you from the south?    

yes unfortunately

81. What does your last status on facebook say?    

i shared this bc it made me laugh so hard that i was crying

82. Do you still talk to the first person you ever kissed?    

yes

83. Are you closer to your mom or your dad?    

my mom

84. Have you ever done cheerleading or gymnastics?    

gymnastics

85. What’s the last movie you saw in theaters?    

damn idk, It i think

86. Do you smoke?    

no

87. Would you rather wear heels or flip flops?    

heels

88. Is your phone touch screen?    

yes

89. Do you normally wear your hair straight or curly?    

straight

90. Have you ever snuck out of your house?    

yes

91. Would you rather swim in a river, lake, or pool?    

river

92. Have you ever made out in a car?    

yes all the time lmao

93. …Had sex in a car?    

yes lmfao

94. Are you single or in a relationship?    

in a relationship

95. What were you doing last night at midnight?    

i was talking to my gf and playing animal crossing pocket camp lol

96. When’s the last time you saw fireworks?    

i haven’t gone out to see them in like a year

97. Do you like the camera on your phone?    

yes it’s nice

98. Have you ever had a friend with benefits?    

yes

99. Have you ever passed out from drinking?    

no 

100. Are you friends with people on facebook that you actually hate?    

yes

101. Have you ever had a pregnancy scare?    

nope i’m gay

102. Name your favorite Kesha song:    

praying is good also kiss n tell used to be one of my favorites

103. Do you have any tan lines right now?    

nope i don’t tan

104. Would you ever wear cowboy boots with shorts?

absolutely not

[thrashff]

P.A.

Title: P.A. (Personal Assistant)

(Part 1/?)

Part Two | Part Three | Part Four | Part Five | Part Six | Part Seven | Part Eight | Part Nine | Part Ten

Pairing: Namjoon x Reader (AU)

Word count: 2,700~

Synopsis: Y/N is stuck in a dead-end job, conflicted between pursuing her music career as a producer and her social anxiety. In a tight spot for money, she takes on a new, well-paying job that she desperately needs as Personal Assistant to the cold and emotionally distant Namjoon, an up and coming rap artist. (Cameos from the rest of the Bangtan boys)

A/N: Hello! I’m very, very new to this, so comments and suggestions would be appreciated! I got the idea in to my head and my brain refused to let it go, so this will be a multi-parter, seeing where it will take me. (Very) slow burn, attempted fluff, alternate character histories, and eventual smut, maybe! I hope you guys enjoy!

It had been a long day, and it wasn’t showing any signs of getting better anytime soon. You stare gloomily at the cheap wall clock hanging on the greige wall of your cubicle, wishing fervently for 5PM to arrive faster. What feels like an eternity later, the second hand finally moves, and you shove your fist into your mouth to stifle the loud groan that escapes you.

It wasn’t supposed to turn out like this. You had done everything right—gotten top marks in high school, finished your college degree, hit the pavement the second you graduated looking for a job. Unfortunately, it was a more cut-throat world than you anticipated, and the only job you could find was as a clerk’s assistant. The pay was bad and the hours were worse, but it was enough to keep you fed and in your tiny studio apartment. You figure things could be a lot worse.

You take a deep breath and square your shoulders, pulling the next stack of files closer to you. If you’re going to be stuck here for another four hours, you might as well get some work done.

Like clockwork, your cellphone rings at exactly 7PM, more or less halfway through your commute home. You startle awake on the bus, automatically clicking the control button on your headphones to answer the call, and a familiar voice greets you.

“Oy, Y/N, are you there?”

“Yes, Yoongi, I’m here,” you mumble, rubbing sleep from your eyes.

“You useless lump, you fell asleep on the train again didn’t you?”

You roll your eyes as you fish your phone out of your pocket, even though you know your best friend can’t see you. “I was watching The Art of Rhyme last night, fuckface. I wasn’t doing what you do.”

He chuckles, the sound low and threatening to anyone else but you. “Which would be what, exactly?”

A dangerous smile dances on your lips and you lower your voice to a whisper so that no one else on the train can hear you say, “Jack off every night to demented clown porn.”

The jibe is enough to startle a laugh from him, forcing him to drop his default pretense of being scary. “YAH, you’re so depraved!” Yoongi exclaims, so loudly that it hurts your ears.

You chuckle, taking an earbud out and massaging your ear. “Probably, but do you have to be so loud? It hurts my ears,” you complain.

“Serves you right, pervert.”

“What do you want, Yoongi?” you sigh, thumbing quickly through the (lack of) notifications on your phone.

“I have a proposition for you,” he says, and you can hear the smirk in his voice. Not for the first time, you wonder what life would be like without a sadist for a best friend.

“No, I will not have sex with you, no matter how desperate for money I get,” you deadpan, rising from your seat as you near your stop. The old lady next to you sends you a judgmental glare, and you flash her your canines in response.

Yoongi groans. “Do you have to be so gross all the time?”

“Do you?”

“You are such a child,” he scolds. “Come out to Roots tonight, I have a prospective job for you.”

Noting the change in his tone, you know that there isn’t room for you to argue, no matter how badly you want to collapse into bed and sleep for the next twelve hours. You merely grunt in response.

“Good. And dress nicely, will you? Don’t embarrass me.”

You make a sound of protest, but he’s already clicked off the call. You feel your face flush as you rush off the bus and onto the sidewalk. Nice? And what the hell does he mean, embarrass him!?

After making yourself some kimchi fried rice (and stowing some in a container to give to Yoongi), you hop into the shower and try to wash off your stress. You do the math in your head and realize that unless you find some other way to supplement your income, you’re going to burn through the last of the loan you took from your parents and you won’t be able to meet your rent.

You sigh as you dry your hair. You suppose that whatever Yoongi has in mind, you’ll just have to take it. You slip into a pair of torn black denims and an old, oversized Thrasher shirt, tie your hair into a high ponytail and slip into a pair of Vans, hoping that whatever it is won’t force you to sell anything you aren’t willing to part with, like your dignity.

You arrive at Roots, an underground dancehall club in the middle of the city, a little past 9PM. Sung Min, the bouncer, recognizes you and lets you into the club without a word, and you wink at him as the people waiting in line groan and complain loudly. It pays to have friends in the right places, you think as you elbow past the crowd to your usual table in the back, cordoned off by heavy black drapes.

Yoongi is already sitting in the center of the booth, sprawled out like the prince that he is, flocked, as usual, by Jin, the owner of the club, and Jimin. The nods at you as you join them, and almost automatically, a drink is placed in front of you.

Jimin grins and greets you enthusiastically, while Jin gives you a more subdued nod of his head in greeting. You can tell he’s already thinking of a corny dad joke to tell you. You smile at them and take a long sip of your drink.

“Long time no see, Y/N! What have you been up to?” Jimin starts.

You shrug. As kind as Yoongi’s music friends have always been to you, you find social interactions exhausting and you’re already wishing you were back at home. In the back of your mind, you make plans to do more digging for new samples when you get home, even as you reply to him.

“The usual,” you respond noncommittally.

Undeterred, Jimin flashes you a grin, and you wonder how so much sunshine can fit in a single person. “You look really nice!” he compliments, and you grimace, hiding your flush behind another sip of your drink.

“Let her be, Jimin,” Yoongi says, smirking at your discomfort. Jin excuses himself and disappears into the crowd, and you automatically take his seat on the couch next to your best friend, tiredly resting your head on his shoulder. Automatically, his arm wraps around you and you bask in the comfort that gives you for a few moments.

“So,” he begins.

You sigh. “What?”

“Shots?”

There’s a glint in his eye that lets you know he’s had a rough day, so as much as you want to decline, you give in to your best friend since childhood and merely groan. “Fine,” you relent. “It’s Friday anyway.”

As if on cue, Jin returns with a waiter in tow, who’s holding a bottle of expensive tequila and a tray of shot glasses, salt, and slices of lemon. “I bet I’ll have you all under the table by midnight,” he jokes.

The three of you let out a chorus of boos at him, yelling out your own bets. Surrounded by their efforts at cheering up both you and Yoongi, you start to relax for the first time in weeks. Twelve shot glasses filled to the brim despite there only being four of you, but you all rise automatically and raise one each in a toast.

“To good health!” Jin announces.

“To great love!” Jimin cheers, and you shake the feeling that he was looking directly at you when he says it.

“To better sex!” Yoongi says, making Jimin flush and Jin punch him in the arm playfully from across the table.

“To excellent friends!” you laugh, and each of you takes three shots consecutively. It’s going to be a fun night, you think, as the alcohol burns through you like a fever.

You take turns dancing with all the boys, even Jin as he awkwardly whips out the most ridiculous moves with you. Yoongi rants about his long day at the label as he spins you around the dance floor, the alcohol having loosened his tongue considerably.

He had been recruited by a big company the year after high school, thanks to his quickly spreading reputation as an underground rapper in your hometown. Being so young in the industry, a lot of executives had tried to take advantage of him, forcing him to mature a lot faster. His brutally honest and straight-forward personality had helped, and you like to think that him staying friends with you had kept him grounded. You were the only one left from his “old life” who still treated him like a normal person and knew him best out of anyone else, even the fellow artists that he now worked daily with. You both had a lot in common—reserved on the surface, but goofy and caring only to those who had earned your trust.

But because he was getting more and more popular by the day, he confessed that he was afraid he was growing harder and colder, and that he had been feeling more and more commodified, like aspects of his personality were being packaged and sold off. People copping his style, copying his flow. You shake your head and give him the advice he already knows but needs to hear. You remind him that he’s human, and that it’s normal to feel the way he does; to use his music as an outlet, to make the most of his platform to reach out to people who are feeling the same way. To share what makes him special and help other people find what works for them. “That’s your gift, after all,” you remind him, and he tugs affectionately on your ponytail in response.

Selfishly, you use his struggles to validate your own decisions. This is why you don’t want any part of the music industry, you tell yourself. You don’t belong in that world. A smaller voice in the back of your head tells you, because you aren’t strong enough to survive.

Feeling better, Yoongi slings his arm around you and you both make your way to the bar for more shots. Jin is behind it, talking to one of the bartenders, while Jimin is off to one side already being chatted up by a small group of girls. He gives you a small wave when he catches your eye, and you give him a smile in return.

Yoongi notices the exchange, and flashes you a knowing look. “He’s in love with you, you know,”

You snort, unladylike. “He doesn’t know me,”

He chortles. “True. If he knew you, he’d be running in the other direction,”

You give him a swift kick to the shin, and he grimaces and clutches it. “Yow! If you injure me, woman, you’ll have hell to pay!”

“Try me, shuga bakemono,”

Yoongi rolls his eyes. “Seriously though,” he says as he stumbles onto a barstool and massages his calf. “You should fix that before it goes too far,”

“What do you want me to do?” you ask miserably. “I don’t even know what he sees in me; I’m not that pretty.”

“You have gained weight since taking that office job,” he points out. “And you’re really bad at make-up and clothes.”

You snap your fingers sharply in front of his face. “Focus!”

He tilts his head at you, studying your frowning face. “You’re not that disgusting, I guess,” he finally allows. “But Jimin is soft. He’s one of the biggest marshmallows I know. I don’t want to see him hurt or disappointed.”

You sigh and take another shot. “Neither do I. He’s a cinnamon roll.” You glance at Jimin from the corner of your eye and admire the way the light catches in his eyes, the line of his jaw and the way his biceps tug at the fabric of his sleeves. You lick your lips and swallow the lump in your throat, shaking the image from your head. “But I have bigger problems.”

You take a seat on the barstool next to Yoongi and tell him about your current financial situation. “Which brings me to this: What job prospect were you talking about?”

Yoongi takes a deep swig of his beer (he’s the only person you know who can drink liquor and beer without getting sick), and unexpectedly takes your hand in his, lacing his fingers with yours. He only does so when he’s about to give you bad news, so you hold your breath and steel yourself for whatever he has to say.

“How badly do you want a well-paying job?” he asks. You simply blink at him, and he rolls his eyes. “Okay, wrong question. Would you take a well-paying job even if it’s in the music industry?”

You try to pull your hand out of his, but his grip is too strong. You glare at him, seething. “Yoongi, you know that I can’t-”

He presses a finger to your lips to stop your rant before you get too carried away. “Hush, Y/N. I don’t mean as an artist.” Even though you’re more than talented enough, he says with his eyes. “They’re bringing a new rapper in and apparently, part of his contract is a personal assistant. He’ll be in the city for the next six months recording his debut, and he wants someone local to help him acclimate or something.”

He moves his hand to your cheek once he’s sure that you aren’t going to have a meltdown at the prospect. “It will pay more than enough for you to be able to stay in your shitty apartment, pay your parents back, and maybe even buy that controller you’ve always wanted.”

You bite your lip, considering the possibilities of a decent paycheck, even if it’s just for a couple of months. Your eyes meet his, and you know that you can trust him not to put you in a difficult situation. He’s always wanted what’s best for you, and you would trust him with your life.

“And Jimin?” you prompt. He flashes you a quizzical look, and you lean a little bit more into the hand on your face for comfort. “Does he think this is a good idea? Can he vouch for this new guy and tell me that he isn’t an asshole?”

“He’s all for whatever brings you to the studios more often,” Yoongi responds dryly. “But as far as I can tell, the new guy is around our age-” Young, you translate in your head. “-and he’s all business. Director Bang was saying that he comes across pretty cold and aloof, comes from a well-off background, so I don’t think he’ll be difficult to deal with.”

You keep chewing on your lip, considering all the pros and cons to the situation, but a slow smile spreads across Yoongi’s face as he watches you. You sigh, defeated. You both knew you would say yes, if only for the money. “Fine,” you agree uselessly. “I’ll do it.”

He pinches your cheek. “Atta girl.”

“See, this is why people always mistake you two for a couple,” Jin points out, an eyebrow raised at your intertwined hands and Yoongi’s hand on your face.

The other boy flushes and pushes you away brusquely. “Gross,” he mumbles as you cackle.

“Oh, c’mon Yoongi! This is the perfect time to confess!” you goad him.

Jin hides his smirk behind his glass as he takes a sip. “Yeah, Yoongi, anything to want to tell us about your feelings for Y/N?”

“Disgust. Apathy. Nausea.” the older boy deadpans, leaning forward and swiping the drink from Jin’s hand and downing it in one gulp. “Can we go now? I’m hungry.”

“We can go to that barbeque place you like,” Jin suggests.

“What about Jimin?” Yoongi asks.

Jin glances at their friend, who has already been pulled onto the dancefloor by the group of girls he’d met at the bar. “I think he’ll be fine tonight.” He signals one of the waiters to tell Jimin where they went just in case, and leaves a bottle for him and his new friends before the three of you set out.

“By the way,” you say thirty minutes later as you dig into your midnight meal. “What’s the guy’s name?”

Yoongi stops shoving food into his mouth long enough to answer you. “Kim Namjoon.”

To Be Continued

[solastia]

As You Are | 1

BTS Song Series: "As You Are,“ The Weeknd

Pairing: Yoongi X OC (Yong Sun). Also, pay attention to the other characters. We’ll see them again in the rest of my BTS Song Series.

Word Count:  4,390

Genre & Warnings: I suppose we can call this angst but there will be romance. I like happy endings. And smut.

Note: Before anyone gets mad, and is all “What do you know? How dare you write about things you don’t understand.” Trust me, I understand. This work is one I’ve been debating writing for awhile, not knowing how I felt about it, because Sun is basically me. I’ve gone through a lot of this. Every emotion she feels is one that I’ve felt. Well, except for getting my big break. Still am at the working a shitty job phase. I would also like to state that if anyone reading this deals with abuse or knows of someone dealing with abuse, I am a safe space. Feel free to talk to me. I’ve been where you are, and I understand. 

Also, WOW this ended up being pretty long. I just got so invested in the story and couldn’t stop. 

Yong Sun was tired. So fucking tired of everything.

Sunny, as she was known to her best friends (They thought it was hilarious because she was anything but Sunny), shuffled into the tiny studio apartment, throwing her bag into a corner before falling into the nearest bundle of blankets. She shared the tiny space with her younger sister Mina, as well as the five girls that were once part of her Kpop group. Rose, Lily, Ruby, Hana, and Nara. All the girls except Nara had their names legally changed while they were still trainees. Even Sunny and Mina, because Sunny’s old name represented evil to her. She chose Yong as their new last name. It meant Dragon. It made her feel strong. And she had to be strong for her girls. For her sister, who was her entire world. It was Mina’s dream to be an idol, and it made Sun happy to help her. They still treated Sunny like she was the leader of their group. The group that never got to debut that is. They’d all left that horrible company that they’d trained at for years together. And now they all starved together. Yay sisterhood.

 Sunny sighed and looked around. There was no real furniture anywhere. They couldn’t afford it and didn’t have space. Just seven bundles of blankets, a plastic dresser for all of their clothes, and her keyboard in the corner. She looked at it for a second, debating whether she felt like playing, and decided against it. It would take an act of God to get her to move right now. She’d just finished another agonizing twelve-hour shift at her most recent shitty job at a grocery store, and it felt like every bone in her body ached. Unfortunately, she was also hungry, but the chances of there being anything to eat in the house were slim, so she decided to just sleep it off. 

She’d finally started to doze off when her phone rang. She assumed it would be her sister, so she answered without looking. She shot up as she listened to the person on the other end, eyes widening, unable to say more than yes or thank you and goodbye. Sunny pressed the end call button and stared at her phone. This was going to change everything. They had a chance. Sunny almost felt like crying. She’d been trying so hard to keep everything together for her girls. 

She heard keys turn in the lock, and looked up to see everyone returning together, a couple of them with shopping bags after going to the convenience store for a cheap dinner. 

“Holy fuck you guys! You will not believe who the hell just called me. Bang freaking PD.” She was practically screeching at this point. 

 “What?” Mina looked at Sunny like she’d finally lost it, setting her groceries down and sharing a look with the others. 

"I know this sounds insane, and I still don’t really believe anything. Like, why the hell would he call us? And why would HE call us, not a secretary? But he says they want to try out putting together a girls group. And guess who they want?”

“Are you kidding me right now?” Lily screamed. “How does he even know about us?”

 “I guess someone from our old company mentioned us, and that would be perfect for what he had in mind, but he wants us to come in and show him what we can do in person. We’re going tomorrow at noon. Tomorrow is a new beginning.” Sunny grinned at the group of six girls in front of her, everyone squealing in unison. 

The next day they found themselves in front of a group of people, all of them feeling a bit like performing monkeys, but excited. Sunny did her best to not show how nervous she was, hiding behind a veil of skepticism. It wasn’t that hard to fake though. She still wasn’t sure if this was really happening. On the table before them was Bang PD himself, along with a handful of other people, and one face she recognized. Obviously, this was the culprit that must have told Bang PD about them. Her old vocal coach from the company from hell. He shot her a cheeky grin, and she raised an eyebrow and snorted at him in response. 

One of the people at the table before them, a very scary looking older woman, gave them the nod that indicated they wanted them to start. Sunny looked over at her girls and gave a similar nod, and they all got into position. Rather than using some song or dance that they no doubt had seen a million times before, the girls had decided to use one of their own original pieces. Though they’d left their previous company, they’d still kept up with their practice and creating on their own. The music started and Sunny blocked out the faces in front of them, focusing on the music. She didn’t need to watch and see if her girls were doing well; She knew they would. Sunny lost herself in the song, throwing every bit of desperation and hope into it that she could. They had to make it. As the last note died down, she came back to herself, putting her shields back up and smirking at the people before her. Eyebrows were raised, Coach Nate was all smiles and thumbs up. She was pleased with the response, but only one of their opinions mattered. She looked over at Bang PD and suddenly felt lightheaded. He was smiling too and clapping. They were saved!

A slight movement caught her eye and she peered over at the double doors in the back of the room. Min Yoongi himself stood there, watching them. Sunny would die before admitting this to anyone, but she’d had a thing for him for awhile. He was so very talented. And pretty. She wondered if he was unhappy about this new change for his company. His face gave away nothing of his opinion on the performance. He noticed her looking and stared for a minute before turning and leaving. Sunny was a little disappointed, but she shrugged and turned her attention back to Bang PD. He was telling them that they were in, and what to expect from now on. As the people left, Nate came over yelling with excitement.

"Am I great or what? I knew he’d love you, girls!” They all rushed to hug him, except Sunny, who elected to grin at him from the table she was leaning against.

“Ah, but the question is, what are you doing here Nate?” She asked in a slow drawl, curious but not unhappy. He was, after all, one of the few people she had been able to stand at that God forsaken place.

“It’s Coach, or Coach Nate for the millionth time, Sun.” He chuckled. “I left them a while ago. I had been thinking about leaving there for some time, but about six months after you guys left, I found out the truth of WHY you left. That was the last straw. I decided that I would sing your praises to any that would listen. I got this job last month, and I’ve been bothering everyone here about you guys since then. I’m sorry for what happened. I feel like shit that I didn’t know and wasn’t able to help. I’ve sent anonymous tips to newspapers and stuff since.” He looked apologetically at Mina, and she patted his arm.

Sunny didn’t like to talk about that time, so she cleared her throat. “Moving on to other matters, let’s go pack! They said we can move into our dorms on Monday, so we have to get everything taken care of. Luckily for us, we’re the poor girl’s club, so there’s less to do.” Sunny chuckled, shrugging back into her leather jacket, and leading her girls to the exit like ducklings.

“See ya on Monday, Nate!" 

"COACH!”

“Whatever.”

Monday came and they found themselves staring up at the building that was to be their new home. The woman that introduced herself as their manager explained that they would be on the second floor, with two girls to a room. The funny thing was, she said that like she was apologizing, not knowing that it sounded like heaven to the girls. Manager Kim showed them around the spacious dorm room, apologizing over and over again about size or sharing rooms, or even that there was no vanity lighting in the bathroom. Sunny just wanted her to shut up because she was just thrilled there seemed to be working hot water.

“Now, the biggest issue is that you are not the only group using this building. The top floor is being used by BTS. There is security roaming the buildings inside and outside, and of course, I will be available for you 24/7. However, with a group that big, there are always fans trying to find the place or the ones that have found it are always trying to take pictures or sneak in. Therefore, you won’t be able to leave the dorms without an escort.” Manager Kim rambled as she made her way back to the front door. “I’ll leave you girls to get comfortable. Be sure to call me if you need absolutely anything. I’m on the same floor.”

Finally, she was gone and the girls turned to each other, squealing. They paired off rooms with each other, leaving Sunny to have a room to herself, at Mina’s insistence. Sunny didn’t mind at all. She’d never had a room to herself before, and it was kind of exciting. Before doing anything, she set up her precious keyboard in front of a window in the living room that had a great view of the outside. 

She stroked the keys and smiled. She was actually looking forward to playing again. Finally, she made her way to her bedroom and threw her bag on the ground before looking around. It was already partially furnished. Bed, desk, nightstand…already more furniture than she’d had before. She flopped onto the bed and stared at the ceiling. This all felt so much like a dream, and she really hoped it wasn’t. 

She hadn’t felt this hopeful…in a long time. Not since both she and Mina had passed auditions at the other company. That hope had died out after years of bullying and harsh training, only to get passed up again and again as newer trainees debuted instead of them. She needed this to work. THEY needed this to work. She was tired of having nothing, tired of seeing her girls hungry and exhausted. She was just tired….

The doorbell woke her up two hours later, and Sunny shot up, startled. She hadn’t even meant to fall asleep, but the bed was so comfortable. She got up and stretched, knowing her back was going to hurt her later after years of sleeping on the floor and padded her way out to the living room.

“PIZZA DELIVERY!” A deep voice boomed as Rose opened the front door to reveal six members of BTS holding a ton of pizza boxes. They all gave a quick bow and started walking inside, as the girls exchanged looks of amusement.

“We remembered our first night in the dorms. There was no food, and we were too shy to ask for some sent to us, so we thought we’d bring this by. It’s also so we can get to know our new neighbors!” Hoseok explained, grinning as introductions were made.

The girls had obviously been exploring while Sunny had been napping, because they’d found all the dishes and cups they’d need and set the table, talking and laughing with the boys like they’d known each other forever. She’d merely exchanged polite smiles and accepted the pizza that Jin handed her. She’d never been great with meeting people, not knowing what the hell she was supposed to say. Hoseok seemed to know how she felt because he plopped down next to her at the table and started asking questions, mostly about the music and what they knew how to do. She had to admit they were all nice. They seemed to know how to make all the girls comfortable and were fun to talk to. Although, the blushes that kept showing up on Mina’s face whenever Hoseok talked to her were worrisome.

“Aren’t you guys going to get into trouble for being here? I’m sure they would freak if they found out.” Sunny asked, looking at Namjoon.

He shrugged. “They’ll probably say something, but they haven’t stated any official rules yet. You’re the first girls in the company, remember? I’m sure as long as we behave ourselves, it won’t be a big issue.”

“Aw, do we have to? I’m not good at the whole behaving thing.” Hana joked, earning a laugh from around the table.

Suddenly, the doorbell rang again, and the girls looked at each other like they just summoned trouble.

Namjoon saw their faces and chuckled, getting up to get the door. “Don’t worry. I texted Yoongi to let him know we were here if he gets hungry. He was writing earlier and couldn’t leave.”

Sunny stiffened at that and held her breath. She wasn’t really sure why she would react like that, but ever since she’s seen him watching them the other day, she’d been wondering when she’d run into him again. She watched as the door opened to reveal a tired looking, and slightly uncomfortable, Min Yoongi. Namjoon led him over to the table where he simply nodded at everyone, accepted a plate of pizza from Jimin, and started to eat without saying a word. Sunny thought she caught him glancing her way a few times, but decided she must be thinking too much into it.

An hour later everything was cleaned up and they were all relaxing in the living room, the boys telling stories of the year they debuted. It helped now that the girls had an idea of what to expect, and they appreciated the advice. Even Yoongi had chimed in a few times. Jungkook was being nosy and looking around the dorms when he spotted the keyboard. 

“Oh, who plays?” Jungkook exclaimed, pointing at it.

“Sunny does! She’s so good too. When we were in training, it only took a couple months before she started sounding like she’d been playing her whole life.” Mina was smiling at her, making Sunny feel like a spotlight was shining right on her face. She knew what was coming next.

“Play something, Sissy!” Mina clapped and pointed at the keyboard.

With a groan, Sunny got up and started walking over. As she sat, sneaked a glance over at Yoongi. She was a little embarrassed to be playing in front of someone who was known to be good on the piano, but a part of her wanted to show off a little too. He wasn’t the only one in the world who could be good at something. 

She looked down at the keys, stroking them in thought, before looking out the window she’d placed the piano in front of. She’d always wanted a spot like this for her piano, so she could play and look out at the world. She let her hands move across the keys as she stared out into the sky. She put everything into the song. All of her hopes for the future, her love for her girls, her desire to happy for once in her life, despite the demons that lived inside her. 

She didn’t even notice the room had gone quiet or feel the intense stare of the man watching as she let a piece of her soul exit through her fingers. Sunny finally came back to herself as she played the last note, and just stopped, looking down at her hands. Cheers erupted and they were all clapping behind her. She could hear the boys occasional “WOW” or “So Cool.” Embarrassed by the attention, she waited until she could compose herself before turning back around, only to catch Yoongi’s eyes. He just stared, expressionless, just looking at her. Finally, there was a small smile, that left as quickly as it had come.

“Well, this has been fun.” He drawled, getting up from the couch. “We all have to get going now though. Busy day tomorrow.” He walked out the front door, not even checking to see if the rest of the boys were behind him. The others got up, apologizing, and they left too, promising to stop by again soon to see how things were going. As soon as the door closed on the last member, all the girls looked at each other, before laughing.

The next few months were a blur of activity. None of the girls needed much training since they’d already trained for years. Most of what needed doing were promotions and getting their songs put together. Luckily, everyone had loved the original music that the girls had been working on, and all that they needed to do was record everything. They’d released their first full music video last month, and it was being well received. They’d been able to stay true to themselves and go with their own style. Part of the reason they’d hadn’t gone far in their old company was that they hadn’t been willing to go Bubblegum pop. Sunny still had nightmares of the fluffy dress they’d tried to make her wear. They’d even had a say in the naming of their group. Sunny named them Phoenix. It seemed fitting for the group that died and came back to life. Fans were popping up everywhere and saying how excited they were for an edgy, fierce girl group. All of the girls were getting excited. This was it. They’d made it.

Sunny was having the time of her life. She was starting to feel like everything was going great. All of her girls were happy. She was happy because Mina was happy. She couldn’t even remember the last time she’d seen Mina frown. She knew to keep her guard up, but maybe, just a little bit, she could try to let loose and enjoy this adventure.

She was in her little studio, her second home as the others called it, working on a new melody that had been stuck in her head all day when someone came in to hand her some mail. They’d started receiving fan mail recently, and most of the girls were loving it. Sunny thought most of it ridiculous since nine times out of ten it was someone proposing. Occasionally, she got a letter from someone worth reading. Her favorite had been when a little girl sent her a letter and a picture of her learning the piano so she could play their song. She had to admit she had a bit of a soft spot for kids. She’d starting taking over reading the fan mail herself when Ruby screamed after getting her sixth dick pic. Sunny pointed out with a grin that it was actually sweet since they took the time and money to print it out for her. Ruby was not amused. 

Chuckling at the memory, Sunny reached in and picked a letter at random. It had no return address, which was odd. She shrugged and opened it, pulling out the letter.

My dearest daughters….

Oh dear God, no. Fucking no. 

The letter was shaking in her hands and she wanted to pass out, but she forced herself to read the rest of it, before letting it fall to the ground.

Mina, she had to find Mina. 

Sunny ran to the dance studio, where she knew Mina would be practicing. Slamming open the door, she looked inside and found her in there, along with a coach and some of the boys from BTS. It looked like they were teaching her some of their dances. They all looked over at the sound of the door, but she didn’t spare them a glance as she stared at Mina. When she finally felt she could talk without screaming, she grabbed at Mina’s wrist.

“Have someone take you home. Close all the curtains, lock the door and prop something in front of it. I’ll make sure that there is security in front of the door.” Sunny knows she’s growling and sounding insane, but she doesn’t care. All she knows is Mina needs to be safe.

“Sun, what’s going on? It’s not…” Mina whispered, her eyes going big and Sunny could feel her start to tremble.

“It is. Go. Now.” Sunny yelled, watching as the girls left, confused and worried, Mina following behind them starting to cry.

Sunny hated seeing her cry.

Not realizing she wasn’t alone, she finally let loose her inner rage and slammed her fist into the dance mirror, screaming. She welcomed the pain in her hand and looked down. She’d managed to keep hold of a shard of the glass. She stared at it. It would be so easy. No one really needed her. Mina was with a company that could take care of her now. It was obvious Sunny would never be happy. She’d had a glimpse of peace and now he was here as if to remind her that she was shit and always would be. She couldn’t let him get a hold of her again. She couldn’t handle that nightmare. She closed her hand around the glass. If she just ended it now, she would be free.

Someone suddenly grabbed her and pried her hand open. 

“Drop it,” Yoongi growled in her ear, wrapping his hand around her wrist and applying pressure.

She gave in with a cry, the glass shattering at her feet, her palm dripping with blood, and he moved his hand from her wrist to wrap an arm around her waist and pull her closer.

“I wasn’t actually going to do it. I was just…” she sobbed.

“I know. Believe me, I know.” He sighed, propping his chin on her head.

They stayed like that for awhile, letting her get it all out. Finally, she started to calm down and wiped at her tears.

“I’m fine.”

“Okay.”

“Really, I’m fine.” She just couldn’t stop trembling. 

“Alright,” Yoongi kept his arm wrapped around her torso. “Just be fine sitting here with me for a few seconds, yeah? My legs are pretty tired…”

“Do you want to do that really gross thing where we sit here and talk about our feelings?” he asked, pulling her down to sit on the practice room floor.

She let out a weak chuckle and nodded. She needed to tell someone in case the worst happened, not because she wanted to actually tell Yoongi her fucked up story.  

“He’s back.” she started, taking a deep breath and closing her eyes. She fucking hated feeling this way.

“My Father. He left a long time ago. Not that we minded. He was a monster.” She explained, looking at the floor, not wanting to see the judgmental look that she was sure would be there on his face. “He hurt us, a lot. I did everything I could to spare Mina, but he got to her too sometimes. There were…other things too, but…yeah. We went through a lot after he left, trying to take care of ourselves, and we were sure we’d never have to see him again. We even changed our names, and he hasn’t seen us since we were young. I didn’t think he’d recognize us. He sent me a letter saying he wants to meet.” Sunny closed her eyes again, trying to calm herself mentally. 

“Do you want to meet up with him?” Yoongi asked, grabbing her chin gently and forcing her to look at him. 

“Fuck no!” 

“Then don’t.” Yoongi lifted an eyebrow at her as if that should have been the common sense answer. 

“You don’t understand. If I don’t meet up with him, probably to give him money or something, he’ll go after Mina. That can’t happen.” Sunny explains in a rush, clenching her teeth. “He knows I’ll do anything to keep him away from her, so that’s exactly what he’ll try to do.” 

“We’ll talk to everyone that needs to know and let them know you guys need extra detail. Make sure you carry something with you at all times for protection. We’ll even let you borrow Sejin; He’s huge.” he grins, and Sunny gives a weak chuckle. It’s not untrue. Manager Sejin was a teddy bear, but a HUGE teddy bear. 

“Thank you Yoongi.” Sunny whispers, pausing before adding, “For everything.” 

“Yeah. It’s…look, I’ve been there alright? Just…talk to me if you feel like that again. You know where to find me. Now go get that hand taken care of. It’s going to leave a badass scar. Tell them you fought off Ninjas or something.” 

Yoongi helps Sunny to her feet and walks out of the room without another glance. She watched the back of him until he disappeared around the corner. She wasn’t sure if what she was feeling right now was the beginning of love or if she just felt really grateful, but she felt something. 

A week went by without issue. Yoongi had obviously talked to someone, probably Bang PD himself because security had been tightened not just around the dorms, but whenever the girls left as well. They usually had at least three big security guys with them at all times. Sunny had also gotten back into her childhood habit of glancing around every room she was in to make sure there was something nearby to be used as a weapon. She kept knives strapped to her ankle whenever they left. Most importantly, she made sure Mina was protected 24/7. 

Today had been a long day. They’d had their first TV performance, and it really drained Sunny. As much as she loved music, it was hard getting used to the thousands of stares and knowing everyone was judging you. She sighed as she got out of the company van and started walking up the cobblestone path to their dorms. A hand snaked out and slammed her against the side of the building, where the view was shadowed by shrubs and a large tree. 

“Did you miss me?”

[Chapter 2]

[fifty-shades-of-succ]

Questions 1-104

1. You woke up naked next to the last person you texted, what would you say? “…..FUCK”

2. What’s going on between you and the last person you kissed? Nothing, never been kissed

3. If your boyfriend or girlfriend was into drugs, would you care? Yes

4. Is your last name longer than six letters? No

5. Was your last kiss drunk or sober? Never been kissed and never been drunk

6. Have you ever wanted to have someone but you messed it up? YEA

7. What does your last received text say? What classes u got?

8. How many times have you kissed the last person you kissed? Never been kissed

9. Where was your last kiss at? ^^

10. When is the last time you saw your sister? Don’t have one

11. What do you drink in the morning? A chocolate up and go

12. Where did you sleep last night? In my bed

13. Do you think relationships are hard? Fuckin oath

14. If you could go back and change something in the past 5 months, would you? In the last 6-7 months maybe

15. You’re locked in a room with the last person you kissed, any problems? It’d be an empty room so nah no worries

16. Would you rather it be sunny or rainy? Rainy I reckon

17. Do you know anyone with the same middle name as you? No

18. Are you wearing jeans, sweatpants, or pajama pants? A dress

19. Do you think you will be in a relationship 3 years from now? I think so

20. Does anyone like you? Yea

21. Have you ever kissed someone with a name that starts with an S? Nope

22. Is the last person you kissed gay? Nope

23. Is there a person you CANNOT stand? Yea

24. Have you ever considered getting a tattoo? Not really

25. In the past week have you cried? I don’t go 48 hours without crying yo

26. What breed was the last dog you saw? I think a maltese…

27. Do you dry off in the shower or out of the shower? Out of the shower

28. Have you ever kissed a football player? Nah

29. Do you think you’re old? No

30. Do you like text messaging? Yea its my life

31. What type of day are you having? A long and shitty and lonely one

32. Have you ever thought about getting your nose pierced? No

33. Do you prefer warm or cold weather? Colder

34. Is there a person of the opposite sex who means a lot to you? Yea

35. Would you prefer a relationship or a fling? Relationship I think

36. Are you a simple or complicated person? Complicated, everyone’s complicated in their own way

37. What song are you listening to? Shelter - Porter Robinson and Madeon (I cannot stop listening to this)

38. When you say you’re sorry do you mean it? Yes, I mean it more than anything

39. Is there a girl that knows everything or almost everything about you? No. No girls know even half about me.

40. What made you start liking the person you like now? I don’t even know.

41. When did you last receive a text message? 5 mins ago

42. What is wrong with you right now? Fuckin everything

43. How well do you know the last female you texted? Very well

44. Does anyone disgust you? Yea

45. Would you date someone right now if they asked? Hmmm idk….

46. Are you in a good mood right now? I’m in an alright mood

47. Who was the last person you talked to in person? Luke

48. What color shirt are you wearing? A dress, and white and blue

49. Has someone recently told you something you didn’t want to hear? Yea.

50. Anyone you’re giving up on? I can’t really give up on people

51. Do you hate the person you fell hardest for? Not really, hard to hate someone like that

52. Have you ever thought about giving up on someone but couldn’t? Yea lol

53. Do you like rain? Yea

54. Do you care if your boyfriend/girlfriend drinks? Um idk if they're legal then I dont care. Unless theyre abusive or reckless.

55. Have you ever liked somebody and never told them? Um….no I generally have told everyone I’ve had crushes on, even if its been years after I had said crush.

56. Do you like to cuddle? YE

57. Are you shy? Idk a little bit

58. Do you get along with girls? Sometimes

59. Have you dated the person you texted last? Nah

60. What do you carry with you at all times? My phone, headphones, and a nail file

61. If you were paid 1 million dollars to spend the night in a supposed haunted house, would you? YES, either ay I die from ghosts or I walk out with money so its a win win

62. Do you think you can last in a relationship for five months? yea

63. Think back to October, were you in a relationship? Ye

64. The person you like kisses you on the forehead, do you find this cute? HELL YEA

65. Did anything “cute” happen in the last week? Yeeeeeee

66. How old are the last three people you kissed? Never been kissed yaaayyy

67. Would you rather pay to get your nails done or do them yourself? Do them myself, they don’t last long anyway so why pay money

68. Which do you like better- Zebra print or leopard print? Zebra maybe…

69. Do you have any stickers on your car? No  

70. Would you rather listen to Luke Bryan or Lil Wayne? Who?  

71. Blackberry, Anroid, or iPhone? iPhone ^_^  

72. When’s the last time you had pizza from Pizza Hut? Um….September 17th when I stayed at my friends house. Yeah I don’t get pizza that often I don't like it

73. Do you like diet soda? Not a fan of soda anyway  

74. What color are the walls in your room? Grey and light grey  

75. Are you 16 or older? Yeah bro  

76. Do you watch Pretty Little Liars? No  

77. Do you have a job? No  

78. What are your initials? EAM  

79. Did you ever have braces? Yeah and boy I am so thankful for it  

80. Are you from the south? I guess  

81. What does your last status on facebook say? Don’t have facebook!  

82. Do you still talk to the first person you ever kissed? Never been kissed

83. Are you closer to your mom or your dad? Mum I guess  

84. Have you ever done cheerleading or gymnastics? Gymnastics, yes, but I’d love to have been a cheerleader  

85. What’s the last movie you saw in theaters? God…..uhhhhhhhhh….oh yea I remember. Ice Age FUCKIN 5.  

86. Do you smoke? No  

87. Would you rather wear heels or flip flops? Heels boi  

88. Is your phone touch screen? Yes  

89. Do you normally wear your hair straight or curly? Straight  

90. Have you ever snuck out of your house? No  

91. Would you rather swim in a river, lake, or pool? Pool  

92. Have you ever made out in a car? Unfortunately not  

93. …Had sex in a car? God no  

94. Are you single or in a relationship? Relationship  

95. What were you doing last night at midnight? Sleeping and dreaming  

96. When’s the last time you saw fireworks? On people’s snapchat stories for new years  

97. Do you like the camera on your phone? Its better than my last phone  

98. Have you ever had a friend with benefits? Nah  

99. Have you ever passed out from drinking? No  

100. Are you friends with people on facebook that you actually hate? Ddont have fb   

101. Have you ever had a pregnancy scare? Yeah I didn’t get my period for like 3-4 months even tho I’ve never so much as kissed a boy. It was a terrifying few months

102. Name your favorite Kesha song: TiK ToK  

103. Do you have any tan lines right now? Fake tans lines too many, but I have a triangle on my chest  

104. Would you ever wear cowboy boots with shorts? What kind of fASHION SIN    

Thanks for the ask!!! :D

[topicprinter]

A while back i made my first post on automation ( If you're not using automation you're wasting your time and money) and got a fantastic response (And, full disclosure, a few leads too). Today I'd like to talk about what i can't automate.Disclosure: I own three small businesses and also work as a freelance automation developer. Both of my businesses are highly automated and I've helped over 30 clients save more than a combined 100+ hours every day.If you'd like to read some of my previous posts, please check them out here:If you're not using automation you're wasting your time and moneyAutomation: Three short examplesAutomation #5: How one client made themselves unemployedWhy Automation Matters #3: How i achieved a temporary monopoly overnightBut here's the question: Not everything can be automated, right?Sometimes a computer just isn't smart enough to do it. But other times, there's just too much to automate! Automation is great if there's one or a few time consuming processes being repeated over and over again and so a single tool can wipe out much of the work. But what if there's 20 processes? Or a 100? What if you need to do 20 processes 5 times a day? 20 automation projects would cost you a small fortune.My journeyWhen i started, i was mostly taking on work writing software to automate I.T projects. Then i started getting referrals and before i knew it i was mostly working for small businesses, helping them automate tedious processes.But as i got more and more experience, i realized that my role started to shift. Many of my clients were not the kind that came from a long line of businessmen. Rather, they were clients who were really good at something and making a business out of that something. But they were not 10X businessmen. I found myself giving a lot of 'free advice' on pricing, advertising, processes etc.I also identified a bottleneck. One that all my automation could never hope to resolve: Overload. Stress.StressMost people don't realize how stressful running a business can actually be. Sure, we've all read the articles. We all want to be the next Bill Gates and are willing to put in the hundreds of hours. We've heard the word stress a hundred times. But in my experience, it never 'sinks in' until you're waking up in the morning with 20 different tasks, E-Mails to reply to, people to follow up with and just not wanting to go on with your day.And in my opinion, that's the biggest handicap in many businesses I've worked with. Talented owners who's mental capacity is being tied down by stress. Afterall the more you have on your mind, the less time & energy you have to innovate, to think outside the box, to experiment or to start a second business altogetherThe solutionThe solution? You need an assistant! Easier said than done. Here's just some of the problems that come with hiring an assistant:Pay. Let's assume you're paying the 11.80 minimum wage in New York City. A full time assistant may require 150 hours of work a month. $1770. On top of that good luck finding a dependable assistant that's willing to stay with you for 2-3 years on minimum wage.Office space. It's one thing to run a business out of your garage, another thing to have an office where an assistant or assistants can work. You could go with a coworking but that still adds a few hundred to the cost.Hiring. You're already stressed. You've got calls and E-Mails and appointments and a dozen things. Do you have the time to interview candidates on top of that? To train them?Security. Let's assume you do indeed find an assistant on minimum wage that you can rely upon. Let's also assume that your assistant then goes on to download a pirated video game on his computer, downloading in the process a kind of virus called a RAT (Remote Administration Tool) which promptly reads all the files in the Dropbox folder you've shared with him. Another big problem.Long Term Job security. Hiring a person is a big commitment. If one day you were to let them go it'd put them into one hell of a financial pit. On top of that there's the Severance pay you may need to provide.Legal. Depending on your country and state there's quite a lot of legal work that you may have to do including filing, taxes etc. On top of that there's the benefits that you'd provide your employee.The solution sounds more like a problem. On top of that you might hire an assistant, work with him, train him for a few months. Then they find a better job elsewhere and vanish. All that effort down the drain.Another solutionYou need manpower. There's no way around it. But what if the blow could be softened? This was a solution that came out of necessity. What if you could get an assistant that: Needs less pay, is highly educated, dependable, never leaves their job, is incapable of most security violations & no legal overhead/benefits necessary?How? You don't hire an assistant, you hire me. I hire an assistant and outsource him to you. Working in my office, on my equipment. Trained by me. Let's see how that changes the problems above.Pay. In New York, you get a minimum wage employee for $11.80 an hour. In India, you get a college educated, highly trained employee with great written and verbal english for.. $7. How? There's a huge currency difference between India and developed countries. It's not insignificant, but it's significantly lower.Office space. Not a concern anymore.Hiring. Again, not a concern. You get a shortlist of candidates which you can choose to interview in rapid succession. 30 mins of your time is all it takes.Security. These assistants work out of locked computers where it is impossible to make most kinds of security violations. On top, everything is recorded. While 100% security is never possible, you can get as close as realistically possible.Long term security. When you terminate a contract, you don't fire an employee. Instead the employee is 'benched' for three months with full pay and benefits. During this time we will find an alternative contract. If we can't find a suitable contract, atleast they've had three months notice before being let go.Legal. Again with contract employees you don't need to withhold taxes, you don't need to do much legal. No worries at all.Benefits. On top of this, you get to rest assured that you're hiring employees with full benefits. Health insurance, dental and everything else.Through this arrangement, you get highly qualified, background-checked full time employees with full benefits. The equivalent of somebody making atleast $40/hr in the U.S for a little over $7/hr. And you can terminate the contract guilt-free on demand.Case studyOne of my clients was, indeed, overwhelmed. That's why they reached out to me to talk about automating their business and freeing up some of their time. Unfortunately after a 15 minute call it was obvious i can't automate their business.Their business was custom notebooks and other stationery. They'd get orders from their website and customize in photoshop before sending it out. This involved some back-and-forth with the customer and then the actual design in photoshop. They were spending almost 4-7 hours a day on this and at the point of burnout.They told me if i couldn't automate their business they'd have no option but to scale it down by raising prices. They wanted their life back.I gave them an alternative. Why don't i give you two people. One, a dedicated customer support specialist with atleast 3 years of support experience and one a graphics designer? For $15 an hour you can have both (Or $7.5 per hour each).Then vs NowJust a small time ago, they were considering scaling down their business. Today? They are expanding. These two assistants basically allowed the client to go from spending 6 hours a day on their business to zero.They used this time to audit the entire business. I referred a marketing person who helped them retarget old clients and get new ones. Set up Intercom on their website so potential customers could live chat with his customer service.Today? They have five customer support assistants working rotating shifts to provide 24/7 customer support and live chat.Lessons learnedIt is my firm belief that as a business owner, the number one thing that matters in your business is your time. Not your revenue, not how many customers or employees you have. It is how much time you, as the business owner has.The more you've got on your plate the more your business struggles. It is absolutely necessary to clean your plate. Whether that's through automation, manpower or something else entirely but until and unless you've mastered time management, your business will suffer.​​As always if you have any questions please feel free to comment. I'll try to answer as many as i can.Or if you'd like to work with me, either to get yourself a remote assistant or to automate your workload with software. Or if you're just overwhelmed by business process and want to talk to a specialist, please drop me a message.

[renatedagmarmilada]

LONDON MET POLICE SUPERINTENDENT

Top POLICE SUPERINTENDENT London, was shown heavy porn film of JOAHNNA a friend of ANNA jun sec min of health /porn starlet/ made at BBC with director Sydney-- and told that was me /?/ mother of five 46 yrs old mature University student and artist, and it was a sex therapy using the whole country, killing throughout the country permitted by UNO -- to whom lab st barths Human Research did not give any true facts...

it is called maximising extreme therapy and is all unworkable stuff piled on and on.. ANNA jun sec Min of Health-- I always wanted to throw every offence at one person and see what they could do about it.. The horror of the british concentration camp..silent and unseen. Tory:== when the british government damages an innocent person, it is either very expensive for the government or very expensive for the person, in family's your cases , it is unfortunately terrible wipe-out expensive for you and yours.

Let's be honest - who doesn't love them!

quote-I don't have enough-- oh thank you .. emneti Syrian Thief family -Longley broke into my home again Thursday..I had a shipping order for her stuff..it was my chance to make some spare cash, at her age, what the hell does she know.. teachers and painters...

sweat smell we fed into Sheffield Somalians brains was from the lab jewesses, Margit sweats and they have their menopause-- so ... Fekete did not have one, as she took hormones. also Margit's vaginal smells as she sweats heavily. //these super rich, greedy jewish bitches can afford to have menopauses, I couldn't.. /

tv2pm-- after we have EQUALISED YOU..ah another British word for racketeering, organised theft, and remote torture of the worst kind.. by lab jews so cannot be admitted... hm

Quote --Parkwood school, Sheffield, KIRSHAN Hussein is a thief and a bad thief, /loiters outside of my home hours on end waiting for me to go out..as is his sister MIRAM Hussein... ALI off Rock street was a pretty bad thief, but this mob are much worse.. Nemeti-- Longley st is over here in Upperthorpe all the while looking to break in and thieve.. so called Syrian refugee.. with his friend Abdul and Neseria and her family and step son, in Upperthorpe .. Suleiman is a thief..and fence snitch.

Prince Charles was in the lab st barths Hum Res and on the scanner remote for treatment, that is why we rob /called reducing by lab Jews/ Fekete none stop using west indians and Syrians, who do not know anything about remote --

Guiana black woman Upperthorpe Roman catholic who sends her 20 yr old son robbing for stuff for the children as she spends all £360 weekly on herself on BRAND NEW DRESSES etc-- /saw her/ prostitutes a fair bit, well ok we all know that group all do../ pn scanner permanently---if they catch me for cheating we will just go back to Africa or somewhere else in Europe..

quote - lab st barths hum Res IMOGEN-- in the last 3 weeks, 7 men have wandered round your bedroom robbing stuff, clothes, in your wardrobes, everywhere.. robbing your front room-- all of them blacks and arabs.. living near by.. Wednesday Pakistani from Pagehall broke in and robbed /my UKRAINIAN dad's German Army Sollbuch and several other items/ BECAUSE HE HATES SLOVAKS???????????????????????? THEN GAVE SOME GYPSIES MY ITEMS? GYPSIES DON'T READ GERMAN VERY WELL AND THOUGHT IT WAS HER MAN'S...... MY DAD WAS UKRAINIAN????????????WHY??????????

Fish and Chips shop-- Upperthorpe.Sheffield. Abdul and Neseria, flats Upperthorpe.. tried to sell us your goods there, clothes, paintings etc..I WENT INTO FEKETE'S HOUSE UPPERTHORPE ON THURSDAY-- watched. these thieves are SO stupid that they do not seem to realise that if the door just opens remote, someone is watching them on a scanner and they stay on a scanner...for future use. THEY ARE TRULY STUPID gone silk jacket and sailing shirts from Spain /orig German/ white chines...

Bethany- lab st barths Hum Res. John's illeg daughter-- I sold 6 of Fekete's stolen shirts to a kitch shop, because I opened the doors of her home remote for local thieves.. I also sold 7 other items, art stuff mainly, artists blocks, paints etc

from lectures by Rabbi Rothchild and my mother's stories from home- we lived in the jewish quarter of Poszon, Milealska Uc -Paintings were to illustrate my numerous 'jewish poems' which have all been stolen along with the paintings--there are quite a few more illustrations on that topic, painted in Sheffield, London and Leipzig.

''what write it all again?'' Anna insists that all is shared out of Fekete's work repeatedly, as they sat on her for years, throughout University etc and halved her marks whilst adding sexual innuendos to everything, also all lecturers at all Unis and Colleges were on their scanner /cancers activated?/ Alyson, I have to do it for her- John Fielding board of Lab st barths Human Research, asked us to tear up these 70 paintings, as his daughter Faye used them for her MA ..and sold some of them to the jewish community.. rob some of her glasses, as she sees very badly--again

Minister Prendergast told -- as soon as Fekete dies, all work copied from her work will disappear. But the cheats will have made their names by then.. so they will be the winners.. it is all on a satellite- //flying over Niagara Falls.. Canada by helicopter -my present to myself on my 66th birthday- I don't treat myself with things, this is my sort of present.Canada is very cold in the winter by the way../

From Len Krawchuk: an article about Kupala. The title below is wrong; it should say June 24 (July 7).

Alyson- I asked them to write a sitcom.. it is just slightly different to Fekete's story there, but only slightly. The Minister of health nor the State Minister Prendegast stops us. it was illegal to keep them in our prison and mess with them day and night since 1984//photo Writers Gp

IMOGEN operative-- yes it is very painful what we do to Fekete remote.It is like a truck sitting on your leg.. We have used it on the simples and they scream in pain. ANNA said that is why we should use the population, they just grin and bear it and the doctors cannot help. We have killed about 300 people in the population now.//happer times in China a few years ago

quote 8 am It is embarrassing a foreigner who can paint and write better than we can..and teach us our language, with hardly any schools, and with such a foreign name Plashet Rd back in 1995 macrosound-quote : look at you, small but perfectly formed. No bent anythings, even with your refugee background, you haven't seen us, with your clean living. --- ANNA time and again.. this is not unusual for the Brits, usually unsaid- at school, I came top in English very quickly /mothe...

quote- we have destroyed your total arteries in your body, by pressing remote. It squashes them ./now=top inner right leg-- last weeks left leg-- Meyer pressed arms endlessly, - John Fieldings dog Mohammad pressed chest arteries for months till I fled to China, pain horrendous// It flattens the artery. I am taking part so I have no need to talk. It is a remote concentration camp. Total destruction of healthy human beings by Human Research.

From Richard Woloschuk comes this neo-pagan article about the Ukrainian vinok (floral garland), apropos for Kupala. The term "wreath" is used, but a vinok is a ...

the ladies who looked after the students were lovely..

Beijing-

Your arteries are the system within your body that continually transport the essential nutrients and oxygen that you need to survive, from your heart to the rest of your body. A massive part of staying healthy and keeping your arteries clear and clean has to do with your diet. It is very true when you are told “You are what you eat.” It is also true that what you put into your body will determine your overall health including your cardiovascular health. Adjusting your diet to...

quote--Goldsmiths-- there is some good stuff coming out of the lab.. . No it is not their work, they have stolen thousands and thousands of the small Austrian teacher's art work and from years and years of writing, creatively and from several literature degrees, from her home, taken out of the post office, and in any way they could steal it.. it is Fekete's work, not theirs. They get a job for life with St barths Human research and will be placed into managerial positions immediately for tracing Fekete's work. Not one is college educated, not even GCSE- but all have a jewish father who was a lab staff member- or an unqualified doctor at the lab. it is the biggest rip off ever known to mankind.

sketch book round the city

walking round the city with a sketch book

Peter Ponsonby illeg son of Dr Meyer Edgeware Rd London, who was not really a doctor at all, only passed one exam, copied all SHEFFIELD PAINTINGS-- took cheque for +++++ I sent to China Bank januar 2016 out of post and gave it to him. Stuart, illeg son of Irwin Harry and Blanche of Finchley, I took one off lap top file and others, all originals stolen from home..part of our training is to hack into private laptops and bank accounts, council accounts, electricity accounts etc all companies .. we cannot be stopped.. State Minister Prendergast permits it.

ANGELINA, one of the 4 Poles used to copy Fekete work, given sketch books, join us and you are well paid and lots of benefits, otherwise you will be watched for life..Declined..//Polish contingent of Leipzig Uni Students..1993/

bethnal green London, Margit, mother of John Fielding, board of St barths Hospital, brings a Fielding cousin in to the lab-- two old jewesses, to pass on all my work to.. Dora, liberal jewess, /as Lauren Fielding, nee lara goldstein--//Golders Green-takes it to use.the other jewess Reform, declines. Eleanor30, illeg daughter of John- I have 400 Fekete's sketches, paintings and writings.. Fekete's saved jews from Hitler, it is called turning it all round, instead of being grateful, we destroy her and her family.

Addis Str Upperthorpe 200 something.. black woman Guiana-- sends sons out to thieve. Roman Catholic family gets over £350 per week../I get £95./ watched by lab, mother spends it all on herself so sends 20 yr old son out to thieve for the smaller children-- he took my navy tee-shirts, navy is he school colour, so she asks him to rob all navy clothes, 2 navy sweaters, my best ones- 3 artists blocks etc He went through my freezer.. mother told him off for bringing real food, fr...

when will RF come together.. she won't it is a phase out. They are trying to beggar her, we went too far. nothing will be made good. Anna fixed Princess Di's death and a few others, so she wanted her on a prison. There was nothing wrong with her or her sons. they just messed with them. Everyone knows now what the process is it is just lies and theft to feather their own nests, the lot of them.

we hold the rights to Fekete's work.. I thought you said we had the Rights to her work Anna.. No one cares a damn as long as they get benefits.. Tristran, queen's cousin here, I didn't know they were sending in thieves to rob your work, paid for by the tax payer... they said they had rights to it and you were acting or something.. I have forgotten which lie I told him about Fekete.......

quote --shall I kitsch this, I have been drawing into Fekete's drawings, well they are all stolen from her so what does it matter, at her age, she can only exhibit and now she wont and cant, we have robbed every item of work she had.. Do Fekete's legs hurt now, I have been putting bloater on them, and pressing all arteries, twisting the muscles and burning the skin- we have been told to destroy every body part on her..part of destroying and using her work wholesale.. When we british destroy, we destroy only the innocent and weak but we destroy totally..

quote- lab we have them here, we are beginning to trace and copy them as ours to make ourselves some sort of name... illegitimate children of lab members..

one year at Leipzig Uni-- visiting Berlin too..

See more recent stories

[com100student-blog]

COM 100 Extra Credit: Online Talk Card

Encounter Number 1: Fanciest Restaurant in Chicago for Christmas Eve Dinner, Turns Into a Nightmare

This last Christmas Eve, my family decided to go to “Boka,” the fanciest restaurant in Chicago. This was a real treat. The food is outstanding, the place is so nice there’s a dress code, and the waiters even pull out your seat for you. So when my little brother had an allergic reaction to the $100 steak he was eating, the waiters suddenly weren’t so kind. Let’s just say, the poor guy started puking everywhere... 

Going from an elegant, classy dinner, to a hell-on-earth disaster, it is pretty obvious I used a variety of talk cards. 

Elegant Woman Talk Card: at the beginning of the meal, before the “situation” occurred, I was trying to act very formal and proper. No elbows on the table, please and thank yous, you get the idea. When using this talk card, my liking was moderate. I was gesturing, and using more formal communication. High formality, since I was at a very fancy restaurant, I wanted to fit in so I chose to create more distance. With this particular talk card, I had more of a low power, I was not really talking, I was just conversing amongst my family.

Concerned Sister Talk Card: okay so now, after the “situation,” I was no where near elegant. My main concern, after I gave up on not getting embarrassed, was making sure my brother was okay. My primary goal at this point was trying to understand what happened, and seeing what my brother needed to feel better. My liking was high, as I was going a little ballistic, my formality was low as my brother just up-chucked in a five star restaurant, and my power was high, I needed to make sure the poor guy would be okay. 

The waiter: 

Normal Waiter Talk Card: (pre situation) the waiter’s primary goal was to make sure we, as his customers, were having an enjoyable dinner, so he got a good tip. He would come by the table very often to make sure we didn't need anything to ensure this, which is how he reached his secondary goal: making sure we knew he was there to take care of us if we needed anything at all. The waiter used high liking, smiling and gesturing to us, high formality to show us he was catering to us, and had low power to come off as friendly and welcoming.

After Witnessing the Puking Waiter Talk Card: the waiter was still kind, but now his primary goal was not necessarily for my family to have an enjoyable dinner, but to make sure that everyone else at the restaurant wouldn’t have their dinner ruined by a little puke. He had everything cleaned up in less than 3 mins, went by tables apologizing, and even gave the table next to us a free dessert. He did this to achieve his secondary goal, making sure everyone else would have a great dinner and that this is still a five star restaurant. His liking towards my family and I became lower, not smiling as much. His formality remained high, as he said to my brother, “Sir, please, take some napkins.” And his power became very high, as he created more and more distance. 

Encounter Number 2: Thinking I was in the wrong class, but I actually was not, my teacher was just a jerk.

It was the middle of the school year when I had changed elementary schools because my Dad had a promotion 2 hours away. I was in 5th grade, and absolutely loved math class, I don’t know why, but I did. I had gone into my math class, and willingly introduced myself to evil Mr. Swanson and the rest of the class. Mr. Swanson didn’t ask me to do it, I just wanted to. After I had embarrassed myself enough, Mr. Swanson told me, “Yeah that’s nice, but you’re not in this class. Please shut the door on your way out.” Confused, I left and went to the main office. They laughed at me and said, “Oh that Mr. Swanson, he’s quite a jokester!” In disbelief. I moped back to the class room. The ENTIRE class was in on this mean joke. Mr. Swanson ruined my love for math. 

Math Enthusiast Talk Card: I walked into Mr. Swanson’s 5th grade math class with pure confidence. As I looked at my fellow peers and Mr. Swanson, I talked myself up. “Hi, I’m from Arlington Heights, I love math, I am a nice girl, I had a lot of friends at my old school, I am so good at math, etc.” Unfortunately this went on for like five minutes. My primary goal was wanting the class to know how excited I was to be there, and that I was amazing at math. My secondary goal was to look cool, I didn’t want to be the shy new girl. When lecturing the class on my “coolness” my liking was high, I was smiling and using eye contact. My formality was low, I wanted to be friendly and inviting so I’d make friends. My power was moderate in this case, I wanted to seem confident and not shy. 

Embarrassed Mortified Student Talk Card: After I had found out Mr. Swanson was a jerk, and that I had to go back to the class that was in on a mean joke, my talk card changed drastically. My primary goal now was to somehow still seem cool, but without making eye contact with anyone. My secondary goal was to still be friends with the kids in my class. I walked in, didn’t say a word and just stared at the floor. Mr. Swanson was so amused and told me that no one likes a show off. My liking was so low, I avoided all eye contact, and didn’t even speak. My formality was high because I was so distant, making my power minimal as well. I didn’t want to say anything to anyone in the class. 

Mr. Swanson on the other hand... 

Low-Key Mean Math Teacher Talk Card: Mr. Swanson was expecting me, he knew he had a new student in his class. He told the class that they were going to play a “funny joke” on me, so the whole class was in on it as well. His primary goal was to embarrass me, he wanted me to leave the classroom confused. His secondary goal was to show the rest of the class that he’s a funny teacher. His liking was high, as he was making mean, judgmental faces at me. His formality was high, he was trying to make me feel uncomfortable, and created distance in doing so, and his power was high; Mr. Swanson made it seem like he didn’t have time to deal with my “mistake”.

High-Key Mean Math Teacher Talk Card: Mr. Swanson, now aware I knew the joke, laughed and even encouraged the class to laugh along with him!! His primary goal was to make me embarrassed, and he executed that goal. His secondary goal was trying to show that he was the funny teacher, and not to get that mixed up. His liking was high, as he gestured to me and told me “No one likes a show off!” His formality was oddly low, because he was being friendly with the class, just not me. Lastly, his power was high, he made it clear that he was a jerk. 

Situation 3: Getting promoted at my first job

My first job was at Oberweis Dairy, which I got as soon as I turned 16. I had worked there for a little over a year, but I got promoted 6 months into the job. I went from making orders, to taking orders (cashier) and teaching new employees.

Ice Cream Scooper Talk Card: My birthday is in May, so when I started working at the ice cream store, it was always busy. I used to get yelled at by the supervisors and my boss to constantly be doing something. I had to give them a certain level of respect, and I would roll my eyes at them with the other “ice-cream scoopers”. My primary goal was to get my job done without pissing anyone off, or getting pissed off myself, in the process. My secondary goal was to show everyone above my position that I was a hard worker, but also to show the few others working at my level, that I wasn’t a kiss up. My liking was high with everyone, I would use eye contact and communicate kindly to anyone. My formality was only high with my boss, as I was trying to be respectful to her and her position, but with everyone else it was low. My power was also low, since I just started working there I didn’t want to sound disrespectful in anyway. 

Crew Trainer Talk Card: Once I got promoted, I started handling cashiering and teaching new employees how to make everything. I had a lot more responsibility, which is why I had to change talk cards. My primary goal was to show the new employees how to avoid getting in trouble, and how to stay on top of all the orders. My secondary goal was to show my boss that I deserved the promotion, keeping her happy and also showing the new workers I wasn’t mean like the other people who had a higher position than them. My liking was high with everyone still, my formality was still high with my boss, but now I was more formal with the new employees. I wanted to kind of show them that although I was being friendly and nice, that I was their superior, my power was raised a little when speaking to them as well because I wanted them to know when they did something right, and when they did something wrong.

Anthony DiFrancesco started working at Oberweis Dairy the exact same time as I did, but he never got promoted. 

Fellow Ice Cream Scooper Talk Card: Anthony and I were friends, and we enjoyed rolling our eyes at our superiors but listening to all their directions together. His primary goal was to get his job done without pissing anyone off, but with making it as easy for him as possible. He never wanted to go out of his way. Anthony’s secondary goal was to show everyone above him that he was always on time and never late, and to be really close with the other people at our position. His liking was high with everyone, he would use eye contact and communicate kindly to anyone. His formality was not high, even when he was speaking to our boss. His power was moderate, because he would be a smart ass if he got told to do something he didn’t want to do.

My relationship changed with Anthony after I got promoted, like we weren’t friends anymore.

Inferior Ice Cream Scooper Talk Card: I now was put in an awkward position, because I had to tell Anthony what to do, and ask him to do things we would usually roll our eyes at. Every time I had to correct Anthony, it seemed like his primary goal was to make it as uncomfortable for me as possible, he would make it a joke and undermine my “authority” which made me have to choose to either be friends with him, and fail my job, or to do my job and fail our friendship. His secondary goal was to make it clear that I had to choose being friends or doing my job. Once I chose my job, he became very easily irritated. His friendliness was not apparent, he would not talk to me, look at me, and if he gestured to me it was with his middle finger. His formality would be high, and he kept a lot of distance, and his power was high, like raising his voice and being rude would make him superior to me.