On Borrowed Time - a Star Trek fic (Chapters 1 - 10)
Fandoms: Star Trek, Star Trek: The Original Series (TOS), Star Trek: Alternate Original Series (AOS)
Pairing: McCoy x Original Female Character (Dr. Jennifer Hope)
Characters: The Crew of the USS Enterprise (NCC-1701)
Rating/Warnings: None
Tags: Friendship, Romance, Friends to Lovers, Slow Burn, Warm and Fuzzy Feelings, Mild H/C, Caring/Protective/Tender/Comforting/Happy/Grumpy McCoy
Word Count: This is a long one 😄 (61 chapters - 120k)
Read it on AO3: On Borrowed Time
Summary:
Dr. Jennifer Hope is a breath of fresh air on the Enterprise and quickly wins the hearts of the crew, especially that of a certain CMO.
But the brilliant young linguist carries a secret that seems to upset her and Dr. McCoy is intent on uncovering.
In order to get her to confide in him, McCoy needs to gain her trust, and in the process, maybe, gets more than he bargained for.
There’s a lot of McCoy in this story, but all our other favourite characters are there, too. 😊
Chapter 1
"This is ridiculous! The Enterprise is a starship, not a cruise liner for little girls who want to find out what being a Starfleet officer feels like! We don't have time to play games! We have a mission!"
Captain James T. Kirk was furious. What an outrageous idea of Starfleet Command to send a girl aboard his ship and ask him to find out whether she might - one day - become a good officer. His mission was to seek out and contact new life forms. Not to show little girls round the galaxy.
"I understand why you don't like it, Jim,” Admiral Dakunia’s placatory voice sounded from the screen, “but Dr. Hope is not just any girl. She was one of the finest students I've ever had. She has all the qualities a good officer could possibly have, ..."
"So, what's the problem?" Kirk cut him off rudely.
"The problem is," the admiral continued calmly, ignoring Kirk's irritation, "that, along with being a couple of pounds underweight for her height according to Starfleet regulations, she has some minor health issues. We need the recommendation of someone like you, Jim, if we are to allow her aboard a starship as an officer."
That took the wind out of Kirk's sails, and although he still didn't like the idea, especially after the mention of ‘minor health issues’, whatever that was supposed to mean, he muttered, "All right then, tell her to be ready to beam aboard at 0900 hours sharp tomorrow morning. I don't seem to have much of a choice, do I?"
"No, actually you don't, Jim. But I prefer convincing people to giving orders. And I appreciate you realising the importance of this,” Dakunia smiled sweetly. “So, I gladly accept your kind offer to take Dr. Hope aboard your ship. Like I said, she is specialised in linguistics, working on the intuitive enhancement of the universal translator specifically, but I leave it to your discretion to employ her wherever she might be needed. In fact, I'd very much appreciate you giving her a full all-round-training. The point is to find out how she’s performing under pressure. So don’t be too soft on her! Dakunia out."
As if, Kirk thought, but before he could start to protest again, Dakunia's image had faded from the screen.
"Damn!” he slammed his fist down on the desk in frustration. “This man really knows how to impose his will on people!"
********************
"Calm down, Jim!"
Dr. Leonard McCoy had been sitting right next to his friend in the captain’s quarters, listening quietly to the conversation. He tried to be soothing, even though he knew there was no point when the captain was infuriated by someone abusing his ship or their mission. And the Enterprise was certainly overqualified for training flights. But if Admiral Dakunia had selected the Enterprise in this particular case, he surely must have had his reasons.
At least now he knew why he’d been summoned to join the conversation.
Minor health issues! That didn’t bode well. He’d have to get hold of Dr. Hope’s file right away to find out what exactly was awaiting him. Just what he needed right now. As if a sickbay full of patients wasn’t enough to keep him busy. Best to make Jim see reason quickly, get this over with, and go back to work.
"You have every right to be angry, Jim. What Dakunia asks of you is highly unusual. But you have your orders. So, try to make the best of it. This girl must really have been an exceptionally promising student, if Dakunia is going to such lengths for her. He’s a decent, level-headed guy. I’ve never known him to pull rank for no reason. And who knows, maybe she won't be any trouble at all."
"Oh, don’t give me that, Bones,” Kirk snapped, rolling his eyes at McCoy. “You know perfectly well what 'exceptionally promising' students are like. We've met the kind before."
McCoy just tilted his head to one side, raised an eyebrow, and smiled wryly.
“But you’re right, of course. Let’s give Hope a chance,” the captain went on, chuckling mirthlessly, then added with a scowl, “but she’d better not expect me to make things easy for her. If she thinks that her connection to Dakunia gets her any favours, she has another think coming.”
McCoy almost felt sorry for the girl.
“Maybe try to be neutral when you meet her tomorrow?” he suggested. “Remember? You were just going to give her a chance. Make it a real one.”
“I think you’re needed in sickbay, Bones,” Kirk grumbled.
“I believe I am,” McCoy smirked as he got up and made to leave. “Gotta read up on those ‘minor health issues’. Good night, Jim!”
********************
After McCoy had left, Kirk slipped into his workout gear and went to the gym to let off steam.
He was livid at the prospect of this Dr. Hope coming aboard. They were not on a training flight. They had a mission. And he had a feeling that this was going to be a lot of trouble. The girl was only 23 years old, for Christ’s sake! Granted, she had already obtained her PhD of linguistics. She’d been best of her year and was obviously brilliant. Maybe even less immature than he feared. But still, his ship was not a playground for little girls.
Anyway, no matter how much he disliked the idea, Starfleet Command had left him no choice. There was no way for him to get out of this one. Bones was right, he’d better make the best of it. His orders were to fully integrate her and appoint her to every duty in any field she could be of use to the ship. He was to give her a thorough all-round training and test her abilities very carefully in order to recommend her for further starship assignment, if he thought her so fit. But he was determined to make it anything but easy for her.
Chapter 2
Dakunia switched off his screen with a pleased smile. He’d just given Dr. Jennifer Hope the good news and had been happy to see how thrilled she was at the prospect of being on the Enterprise. He only hoped Jim Kirk wouldn’t take out his anger on her.
After having finished her studies of linguistics at Starfleet Academy at the age of barely 22, Dr. Hope had joined a project doing research on the possibilities of incorporating intuitive aspects into the universal translator.
The project had been limited to a year, and after that she’d volunteered to be stationed at a new starbase in one of the outer sectors of the United Federation of Planets. Of course, she'd much rather have taken an assignment aboard a starship, where Dakunia felt that her extraordinary linguistic talent would be put to much better use. But unfortunately, some minor health issues rendered her unfit for starship duty. At least without further recommendation.
Dakunia had taken a kind of fatherly interest in the young woman over the past three years. She had been one of his finest students ever, and he knew that she possessed the courage and determination it took to be a good Starfleet officer.
Dr. Hope was an exceptional young woman. She'd gone through a number of difficulties in her life already and had come out the other side stronger. Knowing that Starfleet sometimes made exceptions for people who were extraordinarily capable in their field, he’d felt compelled to pull some strings for her.
Therefore, he’d contacted everybody of influence he was acquainted with, and finally they had agreed to grant her a year aboard a starship under certain conditions which she’d accepted more than willingly. Although some of them were rather hard to take. She would, for instance, hold no rank, despite her completed studies at Starfleet Academy. But she was prepared to accept virtually everything that would give her the opportunity to prove herself aboard a starship.
Starfleet Command had chosen the Enterprise, because they believed that Dr. Hope could learn the most there. The Enterprise was known to have the most capable crew in Starfleet.
After his conversation with Captain Kirk, however, the admiral was a bit worried. The final decision whether or not Dr. Hope would be allowed to continue starship duty was up to Kirk's judgement after her training period. Dakunia was afraid that the captain would give her an especially hard time - Jim was known to be a rather demanding captain. But on the other hand, he was also known to be fair. So Dakunia was determined to hope for the best.
********************
Jenny was sitting in her tiny starbase quarters, trying desperately to relax – and failing to do so. She’d been working so hard towards this day during the past three years. She’d been struggling with unknown technology, with a language she was no native speaker of, with friends among whom she felt like a total stranger at times, and with a world that she sometimes felt she didn’t belong in. And now, that the day she’d been longing for had finally arrived, she was so nervous, she felt like running away.
But it was too late now. Admiral Dakunia had already made arrangements for her departure tomorrow. The thought of quitting had occurred to her several times over the past three years, but somehow, she had always managed to hang on. If she gave up now that she had almost succeeded, all her struggling would have been in vain.
So, she gritted her teeth and told herself that she was being silly. That dozens of people before her had felt the exact same way in this situation, and that the Enterprise was no more than an ordinary spaceship with human beings aboard who made mistakes from time to time.
Who am I kidding?
The Enterprise could not be regarded as ordinary, and her crew never made mistakes. But Jenny had faced and overcome difficulties in her life before. Somehow, she would manage again. And she was determined to give it her all.
Chapter 3
When Dr. Hope beamed aboard the next morning, Kirk was in the transporter room to welcome her personally. He wanted to make it clear from the start that she couldn't expect any special treatment because of her good grades and high-ranking connections. She had accepted Starfleet’s conditions and was going to be treated accordingly.
Kirk was prepared for the worst. He knew what ‘best of the year's’ were like. They were annoying know-it-all’s.
He looked at Scotty, who had picked up on his captain’s bad mood and wasn’t sure what to expect himself.
"All right, Mr. Scott, let’s beam wonder-girl aboard," Kirk sighed.
“Aye, sir!” Scotty threw him a glance and activated the transporter.
As soon as Dr. Hope materialised on the platform, the two men exchanged surprised looks. The woman was tiny – or rather petite, Kirk thought was the established term. But she was far from disagreeable. In fact, she was rather attractive.
The first thing that struck him about her were her big, dark eyes darting around eagerly, trying not to miss anything. She was not exactly a beauty, but much rather pretty. Very pretty. And she seemed so natural, like someone you could have a good time with. Her dark brown, long hair was fastened in what was supposed to be a simple knot behind her neck, but was obviously not used to being tied up.
On the whole, she had a slight air of unruliness about her, which made her personable and rather interesting. Kirk liked her right away. She was, admittedly, on the slim side, but not in a skinny way. And although she looked somewhat delicate and fragile, he got the impression that she had much more strength and energy within her than one would presume according to her slight frame.
********************
Dr. Hope stepped off the platform and looked around shyly. She had a warm smile and not a hint of the expected arrogance.
Kirk realised that she was a little unsure of herself, obviously not having expected to be greeted by the captain. But she didn’t just seem uncertain of what to do or say, she actually appeared to be experiencing something like a dream come true.
When she became aware of Kirk's stare, she lowered her eyes and blushed. Kirk, who hadn’t even been aware of staring until that moment, was sorry for having embarrassed her and stepped towards her with his arm held out in greeting.
"Welcome aboard, Dr. Hope," he said with his most charming smile.
"I'm Captain Kirk, … and this is Mr. Scott, our Chief of Engineering," Kirk went on to relieve an obviously more than impressed Scotty from his turn of having to say anything meaningful.
Dr. Hope, apparently, wasn’t sure if shaking hands with a starship captain was appropriate. But after a second’s hesitation, she took his hand, appreciating his endeavours to make her feel at ease.
"Thank you, Sir. Permission to come aboard, Sir," was all she could muster.
“Permission granted,” Kirk smiled, and, to make up for unintentionally having made her uneasy, decided to show her round the ship personally. He wanted to grab the chance to get to know her. Quite contrary to his expectations, he had to admit that he had taken to her rather easily.
"Let me give you a quick tour of the Enterprise first, and then you can get settled in your quarters afterwards."
"Do you show every new crew member around in person, Captain?" Dr. Hope asked, smiling self-consciously.
"Not usually, no, but I think I can make an exception for a beautiful young lady."
Blushing again, Dr. Hope quickly looked away, and Kirk cursed himself for embarrassing her even more.
"Sorry, Doctor, that came out wrong,” the captain tried to salvage the situation, “but in a way, you're not just a new crew member, you’re my guest, too. Today, at least. I have special orders regarding you, and, therefore, I need to get to know you a little. But, of course, you won't get any special treatment. After the sightseeing tour, that is,” he added grinning. “Apart from being the captain of this ship, I'm only human after all."
She smiled at that and, as they walked on, gradually lost her shyness.
Touring the Enterprise, she asked numerous questions and was interested in every little detail. But Kirk felt that her curiosity was genuine, that she was not just faking interest in order to impress the captain.
He had seen this enthusiasm in other space recruits, including himself, before, but with Dr. Hope it seemed to be even more than just that. There was an intensity to her eyes looking around eagerly, as if anxious to take everything in as quickly as possible for fear of waking from this dream any moment. As if it were a special privilege to see all this. But maybe it was. The Enterprise was the Fleet’s flagship, after all.
Kirk enjoyed himself immensely, showing off his ship and his crew to someone so eager, and also approved of how she met everyone from simple crewman to senior officer with deep respect and attention.
He was more than a little disappointed that he couldn’t introduce her to McCoy straight away, as the doctor was busy operating when they toured sickbay. He knew that his friend, who liked to maintain his image of perpetually grumbling curmudgeon, could be extremely charming, when he set his mind to it. And he was already immensely looking forward to seeing his reaction to this extraordinary young woman.
They took a short break on the observation deck, where Kirk got them some coffee, and looked out at the stars.
Dr. Hope had turned completely silent, absentmindedly sipping her coffee and reverently taking in the view. Kirk himself was still awed every time he looked out at the stars and told her how he’d wanted to be out here in space ever since he was a little boy back in Iowa.
He’d seen lots of people react with awe to the view from the observation deck, but her reaction was somehow different. She was not merely impressed but seemed to have fallen into a trancelike state. As if she’d only just realised how small she, or even the starship, was, compared to the universe.
Watching the expression on her face tugged at his heart. She suddenly seemed so very young and vulnerable to him, and he gave in to an urge to put a reassuring hand on her shoulder. She stiffened under his touch at first, but relaxed again after a moment. As if he’d just awakened her from her trance, she turned around and smiled up at him endearingly.
She’d obviously begun to feel comfortable around him, and he was surprised by how much that pleased him. He wanted his crew to feel at ease in his presence, expecting respect but neither fear nor worship.
How strange, he thought, that only a couple of hours ago he’d been angry at the prospect of having Dr. Hope aboard the Enterprise, and now he wanted nothing more than to make her feel welcome. She was just so easy to like. And not only because she was easy on the eye, but because she radiated a warmth and kindness that just made you feel comfortable around her.
“Makes you realise how small we really are, doesn’t it?” he asked, smiling down at her kindly.
“Oh yes, it does, Captain,” she replied wistfully. “It’s overwhelming. Who’d have thought I’d ever see the stars like this?”
What a strange thing to say for a space cadet, Kirk thought, but didn’t pursue it, guessing that she was, as she’d just put it herself, overwhelmed.
On their way to the bridge, the last destination of their tour, Kirk went a little into the bureaucratic stuff.
"You have permission to go anyplace aboard the ship and ask whatever you want to know. Mr. Spock, our First Officer, will revise general starship and emergency protocol with you this afternoon. Starfleet Command seem to be quite convinced of your all-round abilities. My orders are to give you a chance to prove yourself in every field."
“Thank you, Sir,” Dr. Hope answered a little flustered, obviously embarrassed by Starfleet Command’s praise. “I’ll do my best to live up to everyone’s expectations.”
********************
When they arrived on the bridge, Kirk savoured her awestruck face as the doors of the turbolift opened and they stepped out. He clearly remembered his first time on the bridge of the Enterprise and felt ridiculously proud of his bridge.
He gave Dr. Hope a few moments to take everything in, then started to show her around all the different stations and introduce her to the individual crew members.
Uhura welcomed Dr. Hope with a cordial smile, and Kirk could sense an immediate rapport between the two linguists. He’d noticed before, that practically everybody took an immediate liking to Dr. Hope and her warm and unassuming way.
Even Mr. Spock seemed to be taken in by her genial nature.
Although he’d hardly admit it, Kirk thought, smiling to himself.
But the way he immediately launched into a very detailed explanation of his station and duties as a science officer, prompted by Dr. Hope’s very genuinely expressed interest, spoke volumes to Kirk.
None of the reactions Kirk had witnessed so far, however, beat Mr. Chekov’s wide-eyed and open-mouthed captivation. He was so obviously love-struck that the captain was tempted to put a hand under his jaw and lift it back up.
Dr. Hope herself didn’t seem to notice. Or was too polite to show it, if she did. But then, Kirk thought, she’d seemed genuinely oblivious to the many appreciative glances she’d received throughout the ship. Maybe she really wasn’t aware of the effect she had on other people, especially of the male species.
Since Hope and Chekov were closer in age, and Kirk was rather fond of the young Russian, he asked Chekov to show her to her quarters, exchanging an amused smile with Uhura, as Chekov beamed at him and eagerly led Dr. Hope to the turbolift.
********************
Pavel Chekov couldn’t believe his luck. Dr. Hope was by far the most attractive woman ever to come aboard the Enterprise. She was so beautiful and gracious, it took his breath away. He’d known he was in love the moment the lift doors had opened and this ethereal creature had stepped onto the bridge. And now he’d been given the chance to be the first of the crew to get to know her better.
Don’t spoil your chances, Pavel! he thought. Think of something deep and meaningful to say. Make a good first impression!
But somehow, his mind went completely blank. He couldn’t think of a single meaningful sentence. Luckily Dr. Hope came to the rescue and started a conversation.
“How exciting to be working on the bridge of the Enterprise!” she enthused. “I really envy you, Mr. Chekov.”
“Oh yes, I feel very privileged that Captain Kirk wants me on the bridge for Alpha shift. And call me Pavel, please, Dr. Hope.”
“Only if you’ll call me Jenny,” she smiled, offering her hand to him. “Pleased to meet you, Pavel.”
Pleased is an understatement, Chekov thought happily.
They arrived at her quarters way too soon for his liking. So, when she stepped inside, thanking him for accompanying her, he spontaneously offered to take her to dinner after his shift, which she accepted gratefully.
“I’d like that very much, Pavel. You can tell me all about the Enterprise and her crew. I found Mr. Spock very intriguing, for example. He must be brilliant.”
“Oh yes, he is. He’s one of a kind. But there are many interesting people aboard the Enterprise. It’s a great crew!”
And with a happy smile on his face, Chekov headed back to the turbolift to resume his duty on the bridge. He was so caught up in the pleasant anticipation of his dinner date, that he didn’t even notice the amused grins his fellow officers exchanged.
*********************
After Chekov had left, and the doors had closed behind her, Jenny surveyed her quarters and found her bags already waiting in a corner. As she started to unpack, she let her mind drift back to the events of the past couple of hours. She’d been so nervous about beaming aboard this legendary ship and had been utterly shocked to find the captain himself waiting for her and even showing her around the ship personally.
The famous Captain Kirk was even more impressive in person. Charming and very good-looking, too. And after having overcome her initial star-struck timidity, she’d really enjoyed his company. He was pleasant and witty, and she liked how very proud of his ship and crew he was.
Everybody had been so welcoming, Jenny thought relieved. She’d especially liked Nyota Uhura and was looking forward to working with her, expecting to have a lot in common with the lovely communications officer.
And she was also looking forward to spending more time with Pavel Chekov. He was sweet and fun and easy to talk to. And, of course, she had to admit that it was nice to have someone have a crush on her.
Chapter 4
That evening, over dinner in the mess, the captain eagerly told his CMO all about his first encounter with Dr. Hope. How she had surprised him and Scotty with her appearance. How he’d taken to her immediately, just like everybody else aboard.
“She’s a fascinating young woman, Bones,” he enthused. “Unlike anyone I’ve ever met. There’s something exotic about her. And although she’s a graduated PhD, she’s so natural and girl-like, almost a bit shy. You'll like her too!"
"Sure,” McCoy countered, grinning wryly at his friend, “a girl who fascinates you, simply has to be extraordinary."
The captain chuckled softly to himself, remembering Scotty’s tongue-tied reaction, and how he’d had to save his usually chatty chief engineer from having to say anything meaningful.
"You don't have to believe me, Bones, but don't say I didn't warn you!" Kirk wagged a finger at him.
Tired after a long operation, McCoy was in a rather grouchy mood.
"Listen, Jim, Dr. Hope may be nice, and she’s obviously bright, or she wouldn't have her PhD at that young age, but why the hell do they send us another linguist, when I'm desperately in need of more medical staff…"
"I wouldn't mind working in the medical department, Doctor!" an amused voice cut in.
Dr. Hope had been passing by their table in Chekov’s company just in time to hear the doctor’s last statement.
McCoy spun around, deeply embarrassed, only to be even more taken aback when he saw the girl who the voice belonged to. For once, it seemed, Jim hadn’t exaggerated. Taking in the sweet smile, that lit up her whole face, and the big, dark eyes, twinkling at him mirthfully, he thought there really was something exotic about her. Something different. Her crisp, slightly dated accent, of course, adding to the effect.
Kirk gave his friend a broad grin.
"Why didn’t you tell me?" he hissed at the captain.
"I did!" Kirk smirked.
McCoy apologised profusely, using all his Southern charm, and introduced himself to Dr. Hope with a gallant little bow and the hint at a kiss on the hand, at which Kirk had to suppress a snigger.
“Please don’t mind me, Dr. Hope,” he said again, “I’m just a crabby old country doctor, grouching about Starfleet. I didn’t mean to offend you.”
“Don’t worry, Dr. McCoy,” Dr. Hope laughed good-naturedly, gently extracting her hand from his, “I’m not that easily offended.”
After she’d reassured the embarrassed CMO, whom she found very refreshing and who, she sensed, was quite a gentle man underneath his grumpy façade, Dr. Hope told the captain that she’d meant what she’d just said.
“Unless there is some linguistic emergency that requires my immediate attention,” she chuckled, “I’d rather be appointed to where I can really be of use.”
Turning towards McCoy, she continued, “Unfortunately, I don’t have more than basic medical training, but I can imagine there are enough simple tasks to be carried out in sickbay? And, of course, I’d do my very best to become more efficient quickly.”
Kirk looked questioningly at McCoy, who seemed rather pleased by the idea.
“Want to give it a try, Doctor?”
"I could really need a hand in sickbay. We still have so many patients from our last adventure." He put a lot of emphasis on the last word, glancing somewhat reproachfully at Kirk. "And I'm sure, our patients wouldn’t object to a lovely face down there."
McCoy smiled when he saw Dr. Hope blush endearingly at the compliment. Although extremely pretty, she seemed unused to receiving compliments.
"Could you start right away, say tomorrow morning?” he asked in his most charming Southern drawl, still trying to make up for his earlier rudeness. “You can meet me in sickbay at 0800 hours, and I'll show you around."
"Why not start today?” she smiled. “You said you could use a hand down there, and I'm not particularly busy at the moment. In fact, there's nothing else for me to do."
Unlike Chekov, who just couldn’t believe what was happening, McCoy was impressed by Dr. Hope’s eagerness.
If only more people were like that.
"Are you sure?” he made certain, and when she nodded, went on, “Well then, what are we waiting for? Let's go! If you’ll excuse us, gentlemen?"
And with that, he gallantly held out his arm for her and led Dr. Hope towards the exit, leaving behind an amused Kirk and a crestfallen Chekov.
********************
It only took one look for Kirk to see the monumental disappointment written all over Chekov’s face.
“Cheer up, Chekov! You’ve already had dinner with her. Now let someone else enjoy the pleasure of her company for a while. It’s only her first day, you’ll see enough of her in the months to come.”
“If you say so, Captain,” Chekov replied miserably.
Kirk took pity on him and, sitting back down at the table, motioned for Chekov to join him, just as a curious Sulu and Uhura ambled by, eagerly accepting the captain’s invitation to join them as well.
“So, Pavel, what’s she like? Is she as lovely as she looks?” Uhura blurted out before she had even sat down. “I so wanted to join you for dinner, but Sulu here wouldn’t let me,” she added with a reproachful glance at the helmsman.
Kirk winked approvingly at Sulu, who gave a resigned shrug and chuckled, “I had to physically keep her away, you can thank me later, Pavel.”
Chekov shot Sulu a grateful look, his eyes taking on a misty shine as he realised that, if he couldn’t be with Jenny, talking about her was the next best thing.
“She is adorable,” he gushed, “and so beautiful. And she knows so much about Russian history!”
Kirk, Sulu and Uhura snorted as one.
“What?” Chekov asked indignantly. “Didn’t you know that knowledge of Russian history is the best indicator of someone’s sophistication?”
But when the others looked at him incredulously, he couldn’t suppress a guffaw that gave him away.
“Seriously, though. She’s a pleasure to be with. If she’d ask me to marry her today, I wouldn’t hesitate.”
This time there was no telling grin on his face, only a faraway look, that left the others guessing as to whether he was making fun of them again or was, in fact, serious.
“I’ve only really said hello to her, so far,” Uhura chipped in, “but she’s so warm and lovely, she’s promising girl-friend material. I’m really looking forward to getting to know her better.”
“Same here,” said Sulu. He’d found her nice enough, even though he wasn’t as smitten with her as his navigator friend quite obviously was.
“Not girl-friend material in my case, of course!” he added quickly as an afterthought, just to be on the safe side with Chekov.
Chapter 5
McCoy and his new protégé were headed to sickbay. The doctor’s shift had actually ended more than an hour ago, but who was he to refuse an eager young lady to start working. And funnily enough, his tiredness had magically vanished minutes ago.
Although Dr. Hope was trying hard not to let it show, McCoy was well aware of her nervousness. He’d let go of her arm as soon as they’d left the mess, sensing that she was not really comfortable with this level of intimacy yet. He respected that.
It was quite natural, of course, that she should feel uneasy at the prospect of entirely new work in unfamiliar surroundings. In fact, her professionalism was exemplary for someone her age. He had to give her credit for that.
To make her feel at ease, McCoy involved her in some friendly small talk, and as they made their way through the corridors, he could see her gradually relax. By the time they arrived in sickbay, she’d lost her reserve, yet didn't display exaggerated self-confidence, either. She was simply acting natural, which he found very agreeable. Apparently, she needed to get to know someone a little better before opening up. McCoy could relate to that. Being a rather private person himself, he disapproved of people who told the most intimate things to any stranger they came across.
After the doctor had shown Dr. Hope around, introducing her to the few staff on nightshift and the patients who weren’t asleep, he started to explain some basic instruments. Her quickness of mind and keen interest to learn something out of her usual area of expertise were impressive, her determination to do everything just right almost palpable. A girl right after his own heart – efficient, meticulous and reliable. And delightful to watch.
While she was focused on adjusting and readjusting a medical tricorder over and over again to get the hang of it, McCoy had the chance to study her a little more closely. She was good-looking, no doubt, but not in a groomed way. No, her pretty features, although certainly part of her appeal, were not what really made her beautiful. That had more to do with her personality. The warmth she radiated. That catching vivacity.
McCoy was definitely not averse to beauty, he’d met many beautiful women over the years, but at the end of the day, a pretty face was just that: a pretty face.
With Dr. Hope, it was the little things that stuck out. Like the dimples that worked their way up and down her cheeks as she was completely engrossed in her task, or the soft smile, her lips pursed in a little pout in concentration. Her animated movements were gracious and precise. And of course, there was the way she looked at him with those big bright eyes, when he explained something. Eyes like those of a child, eager to learn. And so much warmth in them, too. They seemed to reflect all her emotions. One just could not but like this girl.
He looked around and saw that his patients had perked up, too, since he’d brought Dr. Hope here. She seemed to have a way of spreading cheerfulness, a gift that would come in handy working in sickbay.
When McCoy looked at the time, he found that almost three hours had passed. He’d enjoyed Dr. Hope’s company so much, he’d completely lost track of time.
“I think it’s time, we called it a night, Dr. Hope,” he said, suppressing a yawn. “You’ll want to get some sleep before starting your first proper workday in sickbay.”
“Of course, Doctor, I’m sorry!” she exclaimed. “I didn’t mean to keep you so long. I was just so excited to learn something new and wanted to be prepared as well as possible for tomorrow.”
“Don’t worry, my dear,” he smiled. “It was my pleasure to show you the ropes. Before I can let you start working, however, we’ll have to do your required medical check-up first thing tomorrow morning. Think you can be here early? By 7.30?”
“Certainly, Doctor, I’ll be here.”
“Excellent,” he beamed. “Go get some rest now, I’ll just finish up here.”
“Thank you, Doctor, and good night!”
“Good night, my dear,” McCoy said. And just before she was out the door, he called out, “And sweet dreams! You know how it’s very important what you dream the first night in a new bed?”
“I know, Doctor,” she chuckled, “I wouldn’t have taken you for the superstitious kind, though. Anyway, I’ll try my best to dream something nice.”
“I’m not superstitious,” McCoy muttered to himself when the door had swished shut behind her, “not very, anyway. But a little banter is always good to break the ice.”
And with a satisfied grin, he made for his office to get everything ready for the next morning.
********************
Jenny was lying in bed, looking back on the day’s events, hardly believing that she was really aboard the legendary Enterprise now. Everybody had been so warm and welcoming, she’d felt none of the rejection she’d been afraid of as a consequence of Admiral Dakunia’s pulling strings for her.
She was a little annoyed with herself, though. She’d vowed to make a good first impression, to stay calm and professional. But instead, Jenny feared, she’d come across more like an overzealous child, eager to please.
Maybe offering to help out in sickbay unprompted had been a little too forward? But then again, her wanting to work where she was needed had been the truth. And the doctor had seemed pleased. He’d been very charming and patient with her, and quite fun to be around really, once you got over his surliness. And she’d really enjoyed learning something new. She’d always loved a challenge.
Anyway, she’d be more careful to stick to Starfleet protocol in the future and try to behave according to her rank - or non-rank, as it was. Even though the atmosphere aboard seemed much more relaxed and unmilitary than she’d expected.
What made her really nervous, however, was the thought of her physical the next day. Kind as the doctor was, he didn’t miss a thing. She’d felt him scrutinising her while she’d been figuring out the medical tricorder. He’d ask questions. She’d have to be on guard.
********************
McCoy was sitting in his office, stifling another yawn. With everything going on in sickbay, he hadn’t yet had time to go through Dr. Hope’s medical file. But with her upcoming physical in the morning, he had to catch up on that quickly, no matter how tired he was.
Before he pulled the file up on his screen, however, he wanted to make his own assessment based on his first impression and observations, as he usually did with new crewmembers. He liked to form his own opinion before being influenced by a file.
Dr. Hope, he mused, was a curious blend of highly professional academic and inquisitive little girl. Thinking about the way she wanted to know everything, and her eyes that moved around restlessly, as if afraid to miss anything, he shook his head, considering that this girl was already a graduated academic.
And yet, she also had an air of authority about her that wouldn’t let him question anything she said within her field of expertise. Her vast knowledge of so many things and the perceptive questions she’d asked that evening were impressive. It was fascinating - Did I just use that word? - how confidence and shyness were united in one and the same person. How she aroused both admiration and protective feelings in him at the same time.
Alright, enough of that, he thought to himself. His mind was drifting, he really had to get some sleep.
Curious as to what ‘minor health issues’ he would find, he started reading through the file. He’d watched out for clues all evening, but all he’d seen was a healthy and happy young woman.
Shorter than average – right, no surprise there, a little too light – o.k., quite obvious, too, Dr. Hope had what the file called ‘genetically induced osteoporosis’ – now that sounded intriguing. Apart from that, the file listed ‘nystagmus’ – so that explained the restless eyes, and ‘congenital pelvic obliquity’. All of the conditions could be compensated medicinally or therapeutically but needed constant monitoring. And her bones would probably take longer to heal once broken or damaged.
Right, that would make for an interesting check-up tomorrow. Who the hell had those medical issues in this time and day? What had her parents been thinking?
And feeling a little sorry for her, he closed the file and left for the comfort of his quarters to get as much rest as he could before another busy day in sickbay.
Chapter 6
Dr. Hope arrived in sickbay at 7.30 on the dot the next morning. Not that he’d have expected any different from her.
“Good morning, Dr. Hope!” McCoy greeted her cheerfully. “I hope you slept well. So, tell me, did you dream something nice?”
“Good morning, Doctor,” she sounded amused. “Thank you for asking. Yes, I had a very good night. But, honestly, I have no idea what I dreamed. I guess I’ll just have to hope for the best. To think I might just have ruined my life and wouldn’t even know about it,” she added in mock horror.
“Whatever it was,” he chuckled, “I’m pretty sure it won’t ruin your life. First day aboard and all. Took it out of you, didn’t it?”
“It would seem so,” she admitted. “But I feel very rested and ready for anything now.”
“That’s good. Let’s get started, then. Hop on the biobed for me, will you?”
Dr. Hope obliged with an elegant leap, making McCoy laugh as he began his examination.
The moment she was sitting in front of him, however, the sassy officer-to-be was gone, and in her place sat this timid girl, nervously watching him run his tricorder over her body. Almost as if she were afraid he would find something seriously wrong with her. Although, knowing her medical file, it was not really surprising that she was a little apprehensive.
Her sudden transformation tugged at his heart as much as it intrigued him. He’d have to be extra gentle to coax her out of her shell again, maybe make this examination a little more touchy-feely. A gentle touch was sometimes all it took to gain a patient’s trust.
So, putting aside his tricorder, he took an old-fashioned tongue depressor to check her throat and tonsils, and put a gentle hand under her chin, softly tilting her face up a little. When he felt her almost imperceptibly lean into his touch, he lightly caressed her cheek with his thumb and saw her briefly close her eyes while the softest sigh escaped her lips.
Most people probably wouldn’t even have noticed, but McCoy was a close observer and rather good at reading people. It had only been the most fleeting moment of tenderness, but it had done the trick. Dr. Hope started to relax and revert to her confident self.
The little touch, however, had told him something about her a tricorder never could have.
For all her sass and cheerfulness, and seeming to make friends so easily, he thought, this girl is really touch-starved.
Unexpectedly moved by the realisation, he made a mental note to try and find ways to give her a little of the human touch she so obviously craved, without being obvious or indecent. Like an occasional hand on the shoulder when they talked, maybe.
McCoy continued her check-up as gently as he could, talking to her so kindly and respectfully that she finally opened up to him completely, the last of her bashfulness dissolving. Charming and cheerful again, she lifted his spirits just by smiling at him. And the trusting look in her eyes, when she gazed up at him as she diligently answered his questions, went under his skin.
If he’d been intrigued by her medical file the night before, he was even more surprised now that he saw what excellent physical shape she was in. Some things just didn't fit. Her heart was strong, her stamina admirable. And, taking into account her short size and underweight, she showed considerable strength.
"Ever had problems with your bones?" he asked casually, while she was pushing the pedals for her exercise ECG.
It was odd, she had the body, looks and energy of a twenty-year-old, yet his instruments confirmed what was written in her file, namely that her bones were brittle like a much older woman's.
"No, Doctor, not at all. But then, I've never broken anything so far."
"And your hip? Does it bother you?"
He didn't mention his surprise when he'd found out that such a simple thing as a scoliotic pelvis had not been fixed prenatally. It wasn't her fault, of course, but obviously her parents’ negligence. So, he’d decided to save her the embarrassment and not comment on it.
"Only sometimes, when I overdo my yoga or lug something really heavy around. But not too badly. I generally don't notice it at all."
"Good," he concluded, smiling reassuringly at her. "You're fit as a fiddle. Let's just check out those lovely eyes of yours, and then we're done."
And with a strange sense of protective tenderness for this strong, yet so delicate young woman, he gently lifted her face to check the nystagmus in her eyes. A very rare condition, and again something that could have easily been taken care of prenatally. If he thought about it too hard, he could definitely get angry with her parents for inflicting such unnecessary trouble on their child.
Dr. Hope compliantly opened her eyes wide for him, and he had to fight an extremely unprofessional urge to caress her cheek again, as he gently touched her face to tilt her head the way he needed it for the examination.
"Do your eyes give you trouble?" he asked softly, trying hard to keep any emotion out of his voice.
"I only ever notice the trembling at all when I'm very nervous, extremely tired or dizzy. But even then, I get it quickly under control with the appropriate medication."
"Right," he said kindly, smiling as he detected the slightest tremor in her eyes, "you’re definitely not tired or dizzy at the moment, and there's certainly no reason for you to feel nervous."
McCoy tried to sound reassuring. It was sweet how nervous her first physical seemed to make her. He just couldn't help it, he wanted to make her feel cared for.
Probably, because she reminded him a little of his daughter, Joanna, who was still in nursing school. A few years older than Joanna, but the same clever and feisty bundle of energy. And just as warm-hearted and lovable.
Since he’d have to monitor her health closely, and now that she was even working in his department, he would keep an eye on her. He felt strangely compelled to make sure she was alright. And he wished, someone would watch over Joanna in the same way, when he couldn't be there for her.
********************
After her check-up, the day had passed in a blur. There'd been lots to do in sickbay, and Jenny had met nurse Chapel, with whom she'd hit it off right away, and who'd taught her all she needed to know when Dr. McCoy had been busy elsewhere.
The doctor had insisted on her taking a lunch break, and she’d had a nice chat with Chekov over a sandwich and coffee. She’d felt bad about ditching him so unceremoniously the evening before, and had apologised. Luckily, he’d seemed to understand that everything was just so new and exciting for her.
They’d discovered that they were both passionate dancers and shared a love of old-style ballroom dancing from Foxtrot to Salsa to Rock’n’Roll. Jenny had suggested meeting up for training sessions, and Chekov had eagerly agreed. She hadn’t had the chance to dance in ages and was immensely looking forward to it, hoping that Chekov was as good a dancer as he was ardent about it.
Just before the end of her shift, Dr. McCoy took her aside for a little debriefing, mainly wanting to know, if she still wanted to work in sickbay, now that she had a better idea of what she was getting into.
“So, how was your first day, Dr. Hope?” he smiled, motioning for her to sit down while he perched on the edge of his desk.
“Busy, interesting, exciting, what more can I say?” she gushed and saw the corners of his mouth twitching at her enthusiasm, his eyes crinkling in amusement.
“And are you really sure you want to do this? That you’re alright with it?”
“Did I do something wrong?” she blurted out, suddenly uneasy.
“No, no, not at all!” he laughed. “You’ve been a great help. I was just wondering. I mean, it’ll be mainly hands-on work for you, not much scientific about it. Wouldn’t you rather work in your own field after all?”
"Not at all, doctor," she assured him, "I'd much rather be where I am needed. At the moment, I’m just doing a little research, I can do that when I’m off-duty. Besides, I love working with people."
And I rather like being around you, she added in her head, surprising herself and pushing the thought to the back of her mind for later inspection.
It was only a few days afterwards, when she was lying in bed, exhausted, yet exhilarated from her great and exciting first week aboard the Enterprise, that she remembered.
I rather like being around you.
It was true, she realised. She enjoyed being around the doctor. Even though she’d found his harsh and grumpy manner a little scary in the beginning. There was a warmth to his smile and a kindness in his eyes that made her feel at ease in his presence. He seemed to be well liked by all the crew, and she admired his rather unique bedside manner as well as his sense of humour.
Lovely as everyone else she'd met so far was, Dr. McCoy was different, in an endearing way. Fun, smart, easy to talk to. Not your typical Starfleet officer. He was very outspoken, wearing his heart on his sleeve, his sharp wit sometimes bordering on the offending, but basically good-natured. Highly perceptive and very kind, too. He tried to hide it for some reason, but underneath his crusty shell Jenny had already seen glimpses of the gentlest soul. Caring, compassionate and fiercely protective of his friends and patients.
Being around him made her feel ... safe. Yes, safe and secure in a way she hadn't felt in a very long time. And she liked it immensely. Maybe it was him being a doctor. Or a little older. Or both. The gentle manner in which he'd conducted her check-up, asking questions to the point, but never prying, respecting her privacy, had been so very ... reassuring. Yes, that was the word she'd been looking for. Reassuring. He had this warm and reassuring presence.
She knew, of course, that she had an embarrassingly strong need to feel safe and cared for, though probably quite understandable in her circumstances. And he was just what she needed. The way he stood close to her while explaining displays and readouts, always a protective hand on her shoulder or back.
Silly! She shook her head angrily. You're not a little girl anymore.
She was a grown-up woman. Strong and independent. An expert in her field. At the beginning of her career. She definitely didn't long for a protector.
And yet, the memory of his gentle fingers under her chin, carefully tilting up her face in order to examine her eyes, sent a rush of warmth from her stomach up to her chest. Those intense, blue eyes that didn't miss a thing, so kindly searching her brown ones, seeming to look right into her soul, but really just investigating her nystagmus, had nearly undone her. Kindness always did. She was pathetic.
Cringing with embarrassment, she remembered how she'd hardly been able to fight the urge to lean into his hand, when he'd so tenderly touched her cheek. If he'd noticed at all, he hadn't reacted or commented, for which she was very grateful.
Promising herself to be more professional in the future, she let herself look forward to the upcoming weeks and months immensely. She'd make the most of having the opportunity to work for Dr. McCoy. And she would enjoy being around him while still being her professional self. He was certainly a man she could learn a lot from. A patient and devoted teacher, if you worked diligently and gave 200%, but surely grim and unforgiving, if you made careless or negligent mistakes.
********************
Kirk had McCoy join him for a drink in his quarters that evening.
“I haven’t seen you all week, Bones! Since you left with Dr. Hope the other evening, actually,” Kirk grinned. “Is she giving you a run for your credits?”
McCoy chuckled good-naturedly, accepting a glass of bourbon from his friend and holding it to his lips.
“To keen and hard-working linguists!” he toasted, before taking an appreciative sip and making himself comfortable on Kirk’s couch.
“To think that only a week ago,” he grinned at Kirk, “we were sitting here hopping mad about ‘this girl’ coming aboard.”
“I was hopping mad,” Kirk corrected, “you were your usual calm self.”
McCoy gave a snort at Kirk’s remark.
“Well, maybe you did let it show more that time,” he conceded. “But anyway, you were totally right about her. After you’d met her, I mean,” he quickly clarified.
“You don’t mean to tell me, Bones, that a girl that – and I quote – ‘fascinates me simply has to be extraordinary’ after all?” he asked with a mock-appalled expression.
“At least I can admit when I’m wrong, Jim,” McCoy grumbled, taking another sip.
“And, yes, she is extraordinary. A quick study, prepared to do any stupid chore you throw at her and give it her best, and,” he looked at Kirk going for the clincher, “she hit it right off with Christine.”
“That’s something,” Kirk nodded impressed. “Your head nurse can be quite a tough one to get to know. I was terrified of her for a long time, and I’m her captain.”
McCoy had to laugh at that. He remembered it well.
“What can I say, Jim?” the doctor went on, raising his hands in a gesture of defeat. “She’s delightful to have around. A red whirlwind amongst the calm blues of sickbay. You can tell Uhura that I’m not planning on returning her to communications anytime soon. Even my patients are perking up. At this rate, she’ll turn sickbay into the most cheerful place on the Enterprise in no time.”
Kirk studied his friend closely.
“Is it possible, Bones, that she has you under her spell just like every other crew member aboard?” he asked with raised eyebrows. “You sure sound a lot like Chekov. The boy couldn’t stop talking about her on the bridge the whole week.”
“Ah, speaking of Chekov,” McCoy chuckled, glad to steer the conversation away from himself, “poor boy comes looking for her at lunchtime almost every day. You should see his face when she doesn’t even take notice of him for the longest time, all caught up in some sorting or cleaning. I usually take pity on him and send her on her lunch break with him. I swear, he wouldn’t be more grateful if I cured him of a terminal disease.”
Kirk laughed at that.
“Yeah, he’s totally smitten. Hope it works out for them – I wouldn’t want to see him getting his heart broken.”
Chapter 7
Dr. Hope’s second week in sickbay was no less exciting than her first one had been.
Having proven herself a quick learner, McCoy let her assist him with treating minor wounds. The usual things, scratches, cuts, sprained ankles, and the like. And knowing her eagerness to learn as much as she could, he always gave her as thorough an explanation as time would allow.
Halfway into the week, he was just elaborating on the barbarous methods former surgeons often had to apply, without any sign of warning, she suddenly collapsed. One moment she asked questions and the next she passed out.
Taken completely by surprise, McCoy was barely in time to catch her before she hit the floor, then gently lifted the unconscious girl in his arms and carried her to a biobed, where he administered a hypo.
Hope felt sick and weak when she regained consciousness and tried to get up. The doctor gently pushed her back down, and, smiling kindly at her pale face, took her hand to feel her pulse.
"You gave me quite a shock there, young lady! You should have told me before," he admonished mildly.
"I'm sorry, Doctor, I had no idea it would happen again."
"Again?" He looked at her sternly, concern showing in his eyes.
"I mean, it has happened to me as a child on similar occasions,” she explained quietly.
"Maybe you’re not exactly cut out for work in sickbay after all?” He frowned a little.
"No, it's not that at all,” she was quick to assure him. “In fact, I don't mind seeing things like that, it was just your detailed description that had my autonomic nervous system run riot."
McCoy lifted an amused eyebrow, then smiled at her reassuringly.
"All right,” he squeezed her hand gently, “we’ll give it another go. No detailed descriptions next time."
Then he softly brushed a stray strand of hair from her forehead and put a comforting hand on her arm.
"But for now, you remain here, on this bed. Just a little longer, to be safe!"
********************
Turning away after she’d closed her eyes again, he thought how fragile Dr. Hope looked, lying on that bed, her face drawn and pale, so vulnerable underneath all her sass. Seeing her like this reminded him of a child forced into the part of a strong and competent woman, triggering every protective instinct in him.
He knew, of course, that he was rather susceptible to vulnerability. Always wanting to protect everyone. It was his caring nature that had driven him to go into medicine in the first place. But it had not always served him well in the past. That’s why he tried to hide it behind a thick layer of grumpiness. Why he’d been successfully building up this cranky curmudgeon reputation over the years.
But Hope was different. Not like the people who’d taken advantage of him over the years. She was not playing the helpless-damsel-in-distress card to get attention or manipulate people. Quite the contrary. There was a genuine vulnerability to her which she desperately tried to hide.
Once more, he felt this urge to make her feel safe and cared for. And he had a feeling that, at the moment, she did.
********************
Laughter roused McCoy from his reverie. He looked around and found that, despite his warning, Dr. Hope had already got up and was entertaining his patients again.
In practically no time, she’d become everybody's darling. She seemed to be happy all the time, forever smiling. He’d only known her for a little over a week, and yet he’d somehow already become used to having her around, was, in fact, already finding it hard to imagine sickbay without her.
Chapter 8
McCoy was nursing a coffee in his office, enjoying the quiet and solitude after one of the more hectic days in sickbay.
He still had some reports to file, but couldn’t bring himself to start on it just yet. Instead, he let his mind wander and wasn’t overly surprised when it conjured up Hope’s cheerful face. Thinking of her always had an exhilarating effect on him.
Dr. Hope’s first month aboard the Enterprise had gone by in a flash, and McCoy was more than impressed with her work. She’d always be there to help him and his team, seeming to know exactly who needed a hand. Forever preparing and cleaning whatever they needed.
And she had turned out a real asset in crisis, too. Fully focused and thinking on her feet, she was quick to react to every order he shouted out.
But whenever she had time to spare, she would wander the rooms of sickbay and cheer up the patients.
Joking with those who were complaining about having to wait too long, pointing out to them how fortunate they really were as opposed to real emergencies being rushed in and treated right away.
Soothing and cheering up the more seriously ill or injured, who had to stay in sickbay longer. Always seeming to sense, if they wanted their minds taken off their worries and fears, or if they needed to talk about what had happened to them and why.
He just couldn't get enough of watching her interact with his patients. Wherever she went, it was as if the sun had been turned on.
A warm feeling took hold of him at this thought, and he remembered fondly how even Mr. Spock, in his capacity as First Officer, had, very matter-of-factly, once or twice commented on how crew morale in general had been raised since the arrival of Dr. Hope and her many contributions to recreational activities.
Christine and Hope got along really well, too, and McCoy was more than glad about it. He’d been a little worried that Christine might somehow see Hope, even medically untrained as she was, as competition. But Hope had made it clear from the start that her expertise lay in a completely different field and that she was more than happy to follow McCoy's and Chapel's orders unquestioningly.
The two women also shared a shrewd sense of humour, not unlike McCoy's own. He enjoyed listening to their chatter, often teasing each other - and even more often him, which he didn't mind, since it was always good-humoured and respectful. And highly entertaining to everyone in sickbay.
The whole atmosphere had changed, and sickbay had turned into a warm and cheerful place. Just as he’d predicted to Jim. Visits to injured friends had become enjoyable events, and quite often people would just stop by for a chat or for some advice from Hope.
Word had got around that Hope was an exceptionally good and patient listener, and in only a couple of weeks she had turned into the ship's unofficial "agony aunt", always there for those seeking comfort or advice.
At first, McCoy had tried to listen in on their conversations, concerned that she might give unsound advice, not having had any psychological training. But he soon realised that, in fact, she didn't give any advice at all. She just listened and asked the right questions. Only in practical matters, or, sometimes, matters of the heart, did she voice an opinion of her own.
She was amazing all around, there was no other way to put it. And McCoy did not miss a chance to point this out to his friends, who, of course, didn’t stop teasing him about it. Even Spock, that hypocrite, had come up with some snide remark the other day, although McCoy could have sworn that the Vulcan’s eyes shone a little brighter, too, whenever Hope was around.
Heaving a sigh, McCoy put his coffee and all thoughts of Hope aside, and got on with his work.
********************
Exhausted after a rather stressful day in sickbay, Jenny found that she couldn’t sleep. She’d tried yoga and a meditation tape, but hadn’t been able to unwind.
So she just lay there, letting her mind drift.
She’d been amazed by how quickly she’d settled in, enjoying every moment aboard the Enterprise. She’d made new friends every day and had yet to come across a crew member she didn’t get along with.
Her most pleasant surprise, however, had been to discover the many artistic talents of her crew mates, ranging from music to painting to dancing. Painting, sadly, was not one of her gifts, but there were drama groups, all kinds of choirs and musical bands, yoga and dancing ensembles. It was paradise.
When she’d started her old-school dancing sessions with Chekov, they’d soon found themselves surrounded by people who wanted to join in and learn from them.
Chekov had turned out a great friend and dancing partner, indeed, although it wasn’t always easy to keep him in check, his infatuation with her sometimes getting the better of him. She tried hard not to lead him on, emphasising that they’d never be more than friends at every opportunity she got. But every time she thought he’d understood, he’d look at her with his puppy eyes, and she knew they still had a long way to go.
Fortunately, that was not a problem with Sulu, whose kind offer to help her improve her combat skills she’d gratefully accepted, or Mr. Scott, whose endless enthusiasm for engineering was contagious and a great way for her to get a better understanding of the latest technological developments. Even less, of course, with Mr. Spock, whose frank, yet polite logic she’d come to appreciate, and with whom she’d already had a number of very enjoyable philosophical conversations on ethics and human emotions.
Her closest friend, right from the word go, however, had been Uhura. The two women had soon found out that they had far more in common than just their love for linguistics, and consequently spent a lot of their free time together.
Jenny’s first love, ranking even above dancing, was music. So she and Uhura, together with some lads from engineering, had started a new band focussing mostly on classic terran rock music, intended for others to dance to. It was a great success, more and more people attending their gigs every time, so now, they filled the grand assembly hall on a regular basis.
Between her work in sickbay, her research, and all her recreational activities, she hardly found time to sleep, and she loved it. Loved her life on the Enterprise. Loved how so many people seemed to enjoy spending time with her. And talk to her.
She wasn’t sure how it had happened, but she seemed to have gained a reputation of being a good adviser. Even people she hadn’t really met before turned up in sickbay, asking to talk to her. And even though she couldn’t give actual advice – she had no training as a counsellor after all – she was happy to see that most of them left feeling clearer about whatever had bothered them. All they obviously needed was someone who’d listen and help them rearrange their thoughts.
Sometimes, Jenny caught Dr. McCoy watching her when she talked to patients, clearly checking up on her. And at first that had made her a little uneasy. But when, after a while, she realised that he actually liked what he saw, she started to enjoy his attention. Seeing him standing in the doorway or leaning against the bulkhead, arms crossed and smiling encouragingly, made her feel strangely proud.
Mmmh. Dr. McCoy.
The calm voice in the midst of a frantic battlefield. She had to admit that what really soothed her and helped her to unwind was thinking about the CMO.
She’d felt comfortable around him right from the start, soaking up his kindness, every little touch of his gentle hands.
Of course, she’d heard about him even before she’d come aboard. There were a lot of stories about the legendary crew of the Enterprise going around at the Academy. And Dr. McCoy with his extraordinary medical skills was no exception.
But when she’d met him in person, she’d somehow not really been able to reconcile the tall tales with this humble, unassuming man. Not until a couple of weeks into her assignment, when disaster struck - and she’d seen him in full action for the first time. That’s when she’d found out how truly admirable he was.
The way he’d taken charge, when a battered landing party had beamed back aboard after a mission gone terribly wrong, not a second’s hesitation, radiating absolute confidence, calmly delegating tasks and keeping track of everyone and everything as he steadily worked to keep everyone alive, was incredible and had sparked an unfailing faith in him and his skills.
Only after every single patient had been minutely tended to and had either already left sickbay again or was at least safely recovering, had the doctor let on how worn out he was, and she’d felt infinitely safe at his side ever since, as if nothing could harm her as long as he was around.
Jenny had worked with him through a few similar, if less dramatic, situations since, and never got tired of watching the normally often fretful and worried doctor turn into this confident and unflappable superhero.
She was really grateful he’d given her a second chance after that embarrassing fainting incident at the beginning of her ‘career’ in sickbay. He hadn’t even been angry at the time, only concerned.
What a shame, she’d been unconscious when he’d carried her to the biobed! But she clearly remembered how his hand on her forehead had felt, when he’d so tenderly brushed her hair from her face afterwards. Firm but ever so gentle. Like you'd expect from a surgeon, of course, but she’d still savoured the feeling on her forehead.
Pathetic? Sure, but then, no one ever touched her tenderly like that these days. Even if the doctor had just done it in the line of duty. But then again, he hadn’t had to, had he? It had just been a comforting gesture, not a medical treatment. Just him being the kind man that he was.
Mmmh.
She closed her eyes and relaxed into the memory of his reassuring touch, softly stroking her forehead and running his fingers through her hair. Calming her. Comforting her. Until she finally succumbed to her tiredness and fell into deep, untroubled sleep.
Chapter 9
Scotty was cleaning up his desk in engineering, smiling at the memory of Dr. Hope’s eagerness. She’d just spent an hour of her free time with him and his lads, replacing a combusted tube and happily getting her hands dirty in the process. She looked adorable in overalls, but the lads had quickly learned to pay more attention to her questions than her looks.
When he’d finished clearing his office from unnecessary bits and pieces that had been lying around, he made for the mess, where McCoy was probably already waiting for him.
He hadn’t had a chance to catch up with his friend for some time. The past few weeks had been rather busy, what with the captain getting them into seemingly more trouble than usual and Hope and her insatiable curiosity about all things technical taking up a big chunk of his free time.
Not that he was complaining, of course, he greatly enjoyed sharing his knowledge of engineering with this inquisitive and delightful young lass, and showing off his well-trained staff.
********************
As it turned out, the doctor had been delayed in sickbay, too, and by the time McCoy turned up, Scotty had already got them both drinks and a little snack.
“So, you bagged the lovely lass for sickbay?” Scotty was looking enviously at the doctor over his glass. “Ach, I should’ve recruited her right off the transporter. But then, I didn’t know the linguist was available for retraining, did I?” he added almost reproachfully.
“Well, now and again I happen to be at the right place at the right time,” the doctor grinned at his friend.
“Aye! And I heard how charmingly you welcomed her, too,” Scotty chuckled. “Miracle she even considered working for you.”
“Ah, Scotty, you know me. Charm impersonated.”
“Don’t I know it, laddie!” the Engineer grumbled good-naturedly.
“But you’ve got no reason to complain, really, do you?” McCoy demanded. “I hear she spends quite a lot of her free time in engineering, listening to you droning on and on about your engines. Probably helps her go to sleep at night.”
“Ach, now you’re jealous she doesn’t spend her free time with you as well? But yes, she completely gets what’s so fascinating about engineering. Has a brilliant mind, that one. Even borrowed some of my technical journals. Nothing more attractive than a lass with a knack for technology.”
McCoy raised an amused eyebrow and took another sip of his drink.
“What’s she doing now, anyway, that she’s not with either of us?”
“Probably off dancing with young Chekov. Poor lad is completely smitten with her.”
McCoy nodded knowingly at that.
“Or making music with Uhura, or Spock.”
“Ah, talk of the devil!” Scotty exclaimed. “There she is, deep in conversation with pointy-ears. Well, I say, if I didn’t know better, I’d think he’s quite taken with her, too.”
McCoy snorted.
“Well, you’re right, if anyone could get through to that Vulcan heart of his, it would probably be her.”
The two men watched Hope and Spock thread their way through the tables, looking for a place to sit down, while talking animatedly all the time.
Is there a light green hue to Spock’s cheeks?
“Well, well, well,” McCoy muttered, “looks like our pointy-eared friend has finally found a human who’ll put up with him and his scientific monologues.”
Knowing fully well how secretly fond the doctor really was of their green-blooded crew mate, Scotty grinned at McCoy, and the two men fell into a companionable silence, enjoying their drinks while observing the buzzing of the mess, their eyes somehow always finding their way back to Dr. Hope.
McCoy loved to just watch her and felt he could never get tired of it. It was like watching your favourite kitten. Everything she did, she did with so much grace. From dancing to singing to work.
More and more frequently, he found himself unconsciously seeking out places where she might be, wanting to be near her, even off duty. He’d go to see her perform in the band she’d called to life, or find excuses to be in the gym at the exact time she practiced her dancing with Chekov or her combat techniques with Sulu.
It didn’t matter if she even noticed his presence. He just enjoyed being around her. Her cheerfulness and warmth were balm to his soul, something he desperately needed to exorcise the atrocities he experienced in sickbay on an almost daily basis.
Jim, of course, teased him about it every chance he got. Like right now, joining him and Scotty at their table with a smug grin on his face.
“Stalking our lovely new crewmember again, gentlemen?” he laughed, setting down his drink and grabbing a chair.
“Look who’s talking,” McCoy shot back. “Or are you just checking up on your chess partner? Former chess partner, I should probably say,” he added nastily, nodding meaningfully towards where Spock and Hope were still engrossed in their conversation, totally lost to the rest of the world.
Kirk threw him a pitying glance. It wasn’t hard to guess what had his friend so on edge. And a little amusing, too. He’d never seen McCoy jealous before. But of course, the doctor was still a far way away from admitting to having any feelings for Hope. Understandably, too, given his history with women.
But when Scotty had excused himself to get back to his technical journals, and the two friends were left alone at their table, he just couldn’t bite back a comment.
“Instead of drooling over her from afar, why don’t you just go up to her and ask her out, Bones? You spend so much time together already, anyway!”
“Don’t be silly, Jim!” the doctor snapped irritably. “We’re just working together.”
“Long hours, though, I hear.”
“Oh really, Jim, drop it already! What would I do with a young thing like her? And more to the point, what would she do with an old man, a divorcee, like me? She deserves far better than that. But with all the men fawning over her, she needs a friend, a paternal friend, to look out for her. To see beyond her beauty and charm.”
The captain almost spluttered his drink at that last sentence.
“And yet, she can make you smile and your eyes light up like no one else can,” Kirk stated in an annoying singsong voice.
“Keep your stupid comments to yourself, Jim, or I swear I’ll make your next physical one to remember,” McCoy growled, rolling his eyes.
That shut Kirk up. He’d learned long ago, that he could only go so far, teasing his CMO. It didn’t keep him from trying a different tactic, though. And with an innocent smile he got up from his chair, grabbed the surprised doctor by the arm, and pulled him along in the direction of Spock and Hope.
“I’ll need your help to get my chess partner back,” he grinned.
********************
Before McCoy could protest, Jim had reached their table and pulled out a chair.
“Mind if we join you, Spock? Dr. Hope? I hope we’re not intruding!”
“Not at all, Captain,” Spock said politely, “please join us, by all means!”
He made an inviting gesture with his hand, even after Kirk had already sat down.
“Doctor?”
“Dr. Hope? Spock?”
The two men in science blues nodded curtly at each other, before McCoy sat down, too, smiling apologetically at Hope and relieved to see her beaming back at him, obviously not annoyed at the intrusion at all.
“I hope we haven’t interrupted an important meeting?” he enquired of Spock.
“Nothing we can’t continue some other time, Doctor,” the Vulcan replied serenely. “Dr. Hope was just kindly explaining one of the more puzzling human emotions to me. Jealousy. Very illogical, and yet very intriguing.”
Kirk made a choking sound that he quickly covered up with a cough. And McCoy opened his mouth, but, not being able to come up with a single quip, shut it again. Spock just tilted his head a little to the side, and the doctor could have sworn, he was gloating.
Dr. Hope looked from one man to the other, not quite sure what was going on, and then decided to change the subject.
“Is Mr. Scott not with you?” she asked the doctor. “I was pretty sure he said he’d meet up with you for a long overdue lads’ night.”
“Oh, he was here, all right. Already gone back to his technical journals, though,” McCoy grinned, then told Hope he wanted to hear all about her adventures in engineering earlier that evening.
Spock sat back in his chair, partly listening to Dr. Hope, but at the same time using another part of his brain to study the people around him. He found analysing the interactions between humans a most entertaining occupation.
Contrary to common belief, he felt quite comfortable around humans, even enjoyed being part of a mostly human crew. No one had forced him to serve on the Enterprise. Asking to be assigned to this ship had been his own choice, after all.
Over the years, he’d learned to shield himself against the bulk of emotions that humans just couldn’t help broadcasting. And he’d got used to the more or less constant teasing of his crew mates, having understood long ago that it was part of the human way to demonstrate friendship.
In a way, he’d even come to relish the challenge of a little bickering. Especially with Dr. McCoy, whose affection he could clearly feel underneath the snark. Although he’d never tell that to his face. In fact, he found it most interesting that someone as emotional as McCoy, and proud of it, too, so fervently fought to hide his strongest emotions, namely the gentle, positive ones.
As for Captain Kirk, they’d been through enough together already, to know that they could fully trust and count on each other. He’d most definitely call him his friend. Although the captain, too, liked to tease him a lot, always trying to coax some emotion out of him, he knew that Jim deeply respected him and his skills and had more than once been able to save the ship and her crew by relying on and trusting in Spock’s logic.
Dr. Hope, however, was different in many ways, although some of them he couldn’t exactly pinpoint. Of course, being new to the Enterprise, and it being her first time on a starship in general, made her a bit of an outsider.
She spoke slightly differently, for instance. And although she was as talkative as any human, she sometimes seemed to lack that special connection, the ‘in-jokes’ so common between members of her species. No covert glances exchanged between her and other humans, where he was concerned, either. No eye-rolling like from McCoy or indulgent smiles like from Kirk.
At times, it almost seemed as if her human crew mates were as alien to her as they were to him. As if she was just another kind of alien. All that went unnoticed by the other humans, of course. They just found her ‘exotic’ and ‘mysterious’, which obviously added to her attractiveness.
Like him, Dr. Hope was curious, but not in a meddling, prying way. She was emotional, too, but in a pleasantly nonintrusive way. In fact, her presence had a warm and soothing effect on him.
She’d accepted and respected him like he was from the start. Just as she was unreservedly accepting and respectful of people in general – Scotty’s obsession with all things technical, McCoy’s cantankerousness, Kirk’s brashness, even Chekov’s often clumsy advances.
She never judged, and he felt extremely comfortable in her presence. Not least, because her presence also seemed to shield him from others’ judgement and comments. If that triggered his fellow officers’ jokes about him being just as much in love with her as everybody else, he could easily live with that. He could certainly see why she was so well loved.
He thought back to their first encounter on the bridge where she had already demonstrated her vast interest in the science department of a starship, curiosity being the one human emotion he understood best.
Shortly after, they’d had a more extensive meeting about starship regulations and safety protocols, and he’d found it most agreeable to see her treat this important and serious matter with the attention it deserved. Unlike most new crew members before her, who had openly displayed boredom and started fidgeting halfway through his speech.
Afterwards, to his slight astonishment, she’d asked him very politely, if he could also make time to give her his version of the most important facts of protocol around Vulcans, as she felt that what she’d been taught at the Academy was too basic and perfunctory. She’d further asked him to point out any future faux pas immediately, to give her the chance to correct her misdemeanour and help her in her endeavours to treat everyone with the respect they deserved.
Of course, he’d meticulously done so ever since, and she was always really grateful.
In return, she’d taken on the task of explaining – patiently and scientifically – a number of human emotions to him, elaborating on ‘what brought them on’, as she phrased it, and advising him on how best to deal with them.
Her explanations had been, and continued to be, very enlightening, indeed, and he found it extremely agreeable to be able to turn to her openly with any questions concerning human nature, in the knowledge that he could expect a neutral explanation instead of illogical, teasing remarks.
Apart from all that, he had to admit that he simply liked to be around her. It was highly pleasant to have a conversation with someone who was more interested in what he had to say than in how he said it.
“Spock!”
The captain’s voice brought him back to the present, and he was unpleasantly surprised to find that, curiously, his considerations of Dr. Hope’s character had taken up all of his mind, leaving no part of his brain to keep up with his current surroundings.
“Excuse me, Captain,” he said quickly, “I had my mind on a rather intriguing analysis.”
He saw Kirk and McCoy exchange amused glances, as Dr. Hope excused herself for the evening and the three men politely stood to bid her good night.
Chapter 10
Late the next evening, McCoy went back to sickbay to get something from his office, surprised to find Hope happily dancing through a deserted sickbay to a tune only she could hear. He’d completely forgotten that she had switched shifts that day and was on night duty.
Even though it was obvious that she thought herself alone and he felt like intruding, he just couldn’t resist watching her a little. The way her energetic personality rubbed off on him was exhilarating. He simply felt more alive when she was around and even briefly considered joining her, the idea of taking her in his arms and twirling her around very alluring. But of course, he stopped himself from doing so. It wouldn’t be right. He hadn’t known her all that long, and he was her superior after all.
It took quite a while for her to notice his presence, but when she turned around and found him standing there in the doorway, she stopped in her tracks, a little embarrassed smile on her lips, obviously not sure whether to apologise or just act as if it was the most normal thing to dance around sickbay at night time.
Seeing her discomfort, McCoy let a wide grin spread across his face.
“Don’t mind me, Dr. Hope, just keep on dancing. It’s a delight to watch you. Not many people enjoy sickbay as much as you obviously do. Although you might have to put on some real music next time, so we can all hear it and join in, too.”
At that a relieved smile brightened her face, and she laughed, “So sorry, Doctor. I thought I was on my own. Sometimes, when I’m feeling happy, I just can’t help myself.” Then, sobering up again, she added contritely, “But I can be serious and concentrate on my work, too, Doctor, I promise.”
McCoy chuckled, looking at her fondly.
“You’re a crazy one, Hope, and just what we needed here on the Enterprise. Stay exactly as you are, don’t you ever change! There’s enough misery around here anyway, and I’m sure I can do grumpy enough for the both of us. But don’t worry, my dear, I’ve watched you at work, I know that you take it very seriously and that I can rely on you.”
********************
Jenny couldn’t help laughing, she admired his easy ability for self-mockery. And to hear him praise her work boosted her confidence considerably.
Judging from the relaxed way he was leaning against the bulkhead, arms crossed in front of his chest, an easy smile on his face, he must have been standing there for quite some time already. She liked that. Liked what he’d said about not wanting her to change, too. He’d said it so affectionately, it warmed her heart ineffably.
Suddenly, it struck her that they were basically alone in this part of sickbay. The thought sent mixed emotions to her stomach, and she was relieved when the only patient chose exactly that moment to press the call button. Quickly excusing herself, she got back to work, glad to escape this situation, to which, she suspected, she attached far too much importance, anyway.
If she’d looked back, she’d have seen the shadow of disappointment darkening McCoy’s features. He’d enjoyed having her to himself, for once, immensely, and just stood there in the doorway for several moments before slowly walking out of sickbay.
The next day, however, she couldn’t resist taking the doctor at his word. Right before the end of her shift, glancing cheekily at the CMO, she put on some music, then addressed the whole of sickbay.
“If you don’t like my choice of music, you’ll have to leave sickbay! If you can!” she declared cheerfully.
Everybody, of course, started to dance, even the patients swayed to the happy rhythm, as the first bars of Bonnie Tyler’s ‘Holding Out For a Hero’ rang out.
McCoy returned her gaze with a twinkle in his eyes. And when she started to move to the rhythm, really getting into the groove of the song, she saw him laugh out loud and shake his head in disbelief.
Next on Jenny’s playlist was the soundtrack of one of her favourite classic films, ‘Dirty Dancing’, which she’d made Chekov sit through after one of their dancing sessions.
Just as ‘Hungry Eyes’ began to play, to Jenny’s surprise and delight, Dr. McCoy stepped towards her and, with a gallant little bow, took her hand and asked her to dance. Not a proper dance holding her close, of course, but the feeling of her hand in his was enough to send goose bumps all over her skin. The effect increased by his affectionate smile and the choice of song, of course. Although Jenny was pretty sure that McCoy had no way of knowing the soundtrack and had not chosen that song intentionally.
He was a surprisingly good dancer, really. Moving smoothly and elegantly, and perfectly in time with the music. But when she looked into his handsome face, all she could think was that probably not many people in sickbay had ever seen the CMO grinning like a Cheshire cat before.
********************
About a week after their impromptu dance interlude, Jenny hurried out the door of sickbay at lunchtime, bumping straight into McCoy, nearly losing her balance and grateful for him reaching out quickly to steady her, thus ending up in his arms for a long, exciting, embarrassing, heavenly moment.
“You seem a little distracted lately. Got something on your mind?” he asked kindly, concern showing in his eyes, while she was still busy sorting out her emotions.
“No, Doctor, sorry. Maybe just too many late-night talks recently,” she chuckled, her voice sounding tired, even to her own ears.
“Don’t get me wrong, Hope,” he continued softly, “I really appreciate what you’re doing around here, the way you care about people and how you help them is great.”
He smiled warmly at her.
“But you mustn’t neglect your own needs. Rest, sleep, you need those too! You need to take care of yourself. Or is there something else bothering you?” he tried again.
Jenny shook her head, but the doctor held her gaze.
“If you need to talk, I’m here. Anytime.”
The words nearly brought on her tears, but, with a quiet “Thank you, Doctor,” Jenny managed to quickly turn around and continue on her way.
McCoy watched her go, an uneasy feeling in his gut. He’d have to keep an eye on her. She’d been awfully quiet lately, not her usual bubbly self at all.
He didn’t have to wait long, however. Just before the end of his shift, there was a knock on his office door and Hope stuck her head in.
“Have you got a minute, Doctor?”
“Sure! What can I do for you?” he tried to sound as inviting as he could, not wanting her to lose her nerve again.
“You were right earlier. I’ve got something on my mind. I think I need your advice.”
“Glad you came, it was hard seeing you so subdued,” he smiled. “This will take longer, I take it? Want to grab a coffee and find somewhere quiet to talk?”
“That would be great.”
She seemed relieved to have this conversation away from his office, making him wonder what this was really about.
Knowing that she liked it and felt comfortable there, he suggested the observation deck, to which she readily agreed. There, they got coffee and found a quiet corner to sit down.
“All right, Hope, shoot. How can I help?” he began with an encouraging smile, watching her fidgeting around and giving her time to find the right words.
Jenny was very grateful for his patience.
“I don’t even know where to begin.”
“Just start anywhere. We’ll piece it together,” he smiled reassuringly.
“OK. I’m just trying to do the right thing here. But I don’t seem to know what that is anymore.”
“That sounds serious.”
He raised a concerned eyebrow at her, but didn’t push it, waiting for her to continue in her own time.
And then the words started tumbling out of her.
McCoy listened attentively, calmly asking questions here and there, taking her concerns very seriously. Just talking to him, telling him what was on her mind, was a great relief and helped to clear her mind. He was so understanding, and sitting here with him, she felt warm and comfortable.
Hope’s problem, it turned out, was not her own but that of a female ensign who had come to seek her advice some days ago. McCoy felt sorry and responsible that she’d had to deal with this. He should have been aware that the people coming to talk to her would burden her with more serious stuff, too. She couldn’t be left alone like this in the future. He’d have to talk to her about that some other time.
Said ensign, it transpired, had hinted at having been molested, possibly even worse by one of her male crew mates, but wouldn’t tell who.
“She only said that it was a lieutenant who’d already transferred off the Enterprise some time ago, and had died since in the line of duty,” Hope explained. “If he were still alive, I’d have come to you right away, of course,” she quickly assured him. “I mean, this is a serious allegation, and I wouldn’t want to be responsible for a repeat.”
McCoy was relieved to hear that. But then, he’d never doubted Hope’s sense of duty and responsibility.
“But since he can’t do any more harm, and she told me this in confidence, I was going to keep it to myself. Especially, since I don’t know for sure what really happened between them.”
“So, what changed your mind?” the doctor asked gently, taking in her pained expression and thinking how easy it was to forget how young she really was. The thought weighed heavily on his conscience. He’d definitely have to be more protective of her.
“I can’t really put my finger on it, Doctor, but when I talked to her yesterday, she seemed a little…” Hope took her time to find the right word. “… off?”
She looked at McCoy for help, and he could see her inner struggle. She so badly wanted to do right by this ensign, whose name he had yet to learn.
“I mean, even though there’s no reason for her to be afraid anymore, she’s clearly not over this yet. Over him, or over what he’s done to her, I don’t know. And maybe I’m reading too much into this whole thing. I just have a feeling that she needs help. Professional help. Your help. But if I’m wrong, she’ll feel betrayed by my telling you. I don’t want to betray her trust.”
The words came pouring out now, the relief of confiding in him outweighing her sense of discretion, and McCoy was glad to see it. He leaned forward and gently put his hands on her arms in an attempt to ground her. It worked. She looked straight into his eyes, exhaled deeply and fell silent.
“I’m glad you came to me, Hope. I don’t think you’ve read too much into it at all, and I’ll take care of it. Don’t worry, you did the right thing.”
McCoy saw his words of comfort sink in, and was deeply touched by the look of relief and utmost trust in her eyes, as she gratefully looked up at him. He’d really have to look out more for her from now on. He needed to keep in mind that, despite her confident and mature personality, she was barely grown-up and had accordingly limited life experience, after all.
Once again, he felt a warm wave of protectiveness for this extraordinary young woman wash over him and couldn’t resist a comforting caress of his hand to her face. But when, for a brief moment, she smilingly leaned into his touch, lifting affectionate eyes to his, he realised that, deep down, he felt something else, too. And that something, though not yet definable, worried him.
An instant later, however, he did what he always did to unbidden thoughts. He pushed them to the back of his mind, totally intending to forget about them.
********************
Continue to:
Chapters 11 - 20
Chapters 21 - 30
Chapters 31 - 40
Chapters 41 - 50
Chapters 51 - 61
Or read it on AO3: On Borrowed Time
************
Disclaimer:
Nothing of or associated with Star Trek is mine – it all belongs to Paramount / ViacomCBS (or whoever else is currently holding the rights). This is a work of fanfiction, no infringement intended.
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