#um i think is very good that he tries but yes he does a lot wrong while trying to help

[mithranon]

I keep thinking about this post and trying to do so objectively because this perspective interests me. I don't know that it is cruelty, though it is certainly ruthless. Mithrun thinks in a way that is very factual and to the point and I feel like a factor of that frame of logic can be a sense of cruelty, but that he is punishing Thistle...? I don't know. It's an interesting take, but I have a hard time attributing malice, and it isn't "I like him" that results in this. It's more like... acts of cruelty can seem intentional even when they're not necessarily. Thistle is the biggest threat and while I can see the perspective of playing with him, and agree that it is very ruthless, I don't know that the aim is to punish Thistle, and can see the perspective of Mithrun simply thinking objectively and efficiently, machine-like, about the goal. I don't want to say he isn't self aware, but he's also incredibly single-minded, and I think this results in a fair amount of forgetting, even beyond his lack of care. I think he's closer than ever to his goal, and he could end the dungeon right then and there, and while he may believe himself to be right and helping, or trying to in his own way, he's failing to do so because he's actually quite restless and impulsive, and it's right there in his hands.

As someone who has experienced severe and intense burnout from chasing things similarly, I think he is trying to give Thistle genuine advice, and wants him to free himself by telling him the truth, but I believe half of the problem is that he's doing it in a way that would work for him, not understanding Thistle, nor really trying, because I do think he wants to help, and we're told and shown this, Mithrun seems to feel a great personal responsibility for the things that have happened around him, and a desire to do something about these things, possibly in part because of a low sense of self worth that makes him feel that it should be him who places himself on the line rather than anyone else, but sometimes wanting to help hurts more than it fixes if you can't reach people where they are. You see this with Marcille, too. He's aggressive and he is absolutely self-sabotaging his chances to convince anyone, because he's caught up in his goals, incredibly narrowly focused, and pretty much actively makes it worse because, while he wants to help people, he is still failing to do it in a way that is right.

And then I want to talk about pre-Dungeon Mithrun, who I feel was also doing this, where he was trying very hard to be "good" (and morality is often seen this way, where being small, unobtrusive, not causing any problems, is what constitutes for "good" behavior) so I think in both cases, he is trying too hard, overextending, and hurting himself as well as others because he is a bit unbending. He wants desperately to reach his goals, whether he wants to be loved or to die, but he's consistently a character who fails to manage that because, try though he might, to try means nothing if you are not doing it right. He keeps doing it wrong, where pre-Dungeon, he isn't actually bettering himself any, he's just hiding inside his own shell, envious and jealous and very inferior-feeling, and he builds to hide it away, but there is never a moment where he's connecting with others. He actively isolates and holds himself at the corner. He refuses to be vulnerable because he has to be in control, and he wants to change, I think, but the fear is too large. He gets in his own way.

And post-Dungeon, he really does care. I think he's always cared, but it can be hard to manage these things in healthy ways when you've lived in a way that was fundamentally unhealthy. There's work yet to be undone so that he can do it properly. And you can see the thoughtfulness in at least some of his actions, the way he looks at Marcille, saying "Free yourself" to Thistle, because that is what he wants, and I think in delivering the facts so blunt and straightforward, he likely does see it as useful (we're shown that this is essentially how his brain works), but I don't think he's considering how it could be unhelpful to do that to someone like Thistle. That there are certain things he fails to see.

It isn't a lack of awareness or social cues, but the single-minded focus, the restlessness, the impulsive behavior, being so close that he gets impatient and loses his composure.

"Useful" isn't necessarily "helpful", though. And he is too angry, acting too rashly, not thinking as well as he would, and not necessarily aware of that in the moment because I don't really imagine that he can feel his feelings in the moment they exist. It's likely something that requires reflection.

However, there's much here I agree with, and I really enjoy this perspective because it made me think. I don't see it as cruelty, myself, as I stated, but I think that's because I'm not registering any "intent", and I guess, really, does intent matter after a point? I would say it doesn't, really, because you still have to do better and try to reach people.

Mithrun is just... He's a knife, albeit a blunt one, and I think that, with his care gone and so his veneer, too, in the heat of the moment, he does not yet know how to be anything other than a knife. To be better.

I see it as a genuine attempt that misses the mark because it really is cruel, whether or not he means that, subconsciously or otherwise, and this is because he has so much work to do, and a half of that is realizing that he hasn't totally lost himself the way he believes, that there is so much left behind of the person he was before.

Generally speaking, I know we're told he has no desires, but we see no desires in a character like Thistle, who can't get up on his own, and Kabru says as much about him not being able to access the awareness of these things but certainly still needing to, still feeling, and I feel like there's some allegory for alexithymia the way that it takes him time to realize his desire was to be eaten. That's a great example of having a feeling you can't place in the moment, requiring lots of reflection to access these parts of yourself. I won't say "He didn't lose anything", but I think he really didn't lose as much as he believes. To do that work, though, he has to go back to who he was, because there's definitely a lot of that still in there, even if he no longer feels the anger and envy and resentment, he's still not done the work, and to be fair, he has no time for that kind of therapeutic work, but as you said, you can do a lot of damage with these misplaced feelings, of trying to help but wrong, and the way those things and the person he was and how he feels about it intermingle, it is absolutely a toxic mixture.

I don't know if I really added anything to this. I just had a lot of Thoughts™️. I guess that's all of them, though?

thinking about this post again, and what malewifesband points out in the reblogs about Mithrun's violence towards Thistle vs his violence towards the shadow governor

i hadn't made that comparison myself before, but it truly is such a striking difference, and because Thistle is my special little guy i've been mulling over it

i think it's interesting that Mithrun's behavior towards Thistle is not only violent and frightening but outright cruel in a way that he isn't even with Marcille

(which is not to say that he isn't violent, frightening, and shitty to her - the whole bit where he catches her out in a lie and then the canaries sit around shit-talking her mom and the fact that she's a half-elf is very bigoted and unpleasant!)

he scares the absolute shit out of Marcille, but his violence is very single-minded and directed. first, he's trying to get the books off her. then, he's trying to kill her.

with Thistle... it almost feels like Mithrun is toying with him. take a chunk out of his arm so he drops the book. take a chunk out of his thigh when he tries to run and grab it. chokeslam him to the ground and get on top of him and say The Cruelest Possible Shit to him after tormenting him physically like a cat with a bird.

now of course, we can justify. he didn't want to risk killing Thistle outright (although then we get into the questionable territory of "would being sent to the surface kill him anyway?" since he says the dungeon lord has their lifespan extended by the dungeon, and that teleporting Thistle to the surface would confirm if he is or isn't the dungeon lord), or he can't be so precise when he isn't able to touch someone and he's using his magic on them from a distance, especially with his lack of depth perception or whatever, you know

he hurts Thistle, who comes across like someone who's not used to experiencing a lot of physical pain, and then he tells him that the person he's dedicated himself to is dead, there's no point to continuing, and that the most cherished person in his life wished for his death

i do think that Mithrun, on some level, genuinely does want to prevent other people from suffering his fate, whether that means preventing them from becoming the dungeon lord in the first place or convincing them to give it up before they're devoured and left alive but empty. however, i also think (thanks to talking with @schniggles) that on a much deeper, more viscerally subconscious level, he wants to be eaten, and when those two desires come into conflict, the desire to die is stronger and results in what can at best be described as half-assery and at worst is outright self-sabotage

he tells Thistle there's no point to what he's doing and that it's time for him to free himself. charitably, one can imagine that he sees his words as the equivalent of a brisk slap to the face to snap Thistle out of his dungeon lord hysteria. but the thing about Mithrun is that it's not that he doesn't understand social conventions or other people's feelings, he just doesn't care

he didn't suddenly forget the concept of being nice or being cruel, or what it means to hurt someone's feelings. he just doesn't give a shit. it's not important to him. he lacks the desire to even make the effort for appearance's sake.

it's not like he doesn't know that telling the Melinis' elf slave that Delgal is dead, he never said what Thistle says he did and Thistle just misunderstood, and that Delgal wished for Thistle's death is going to fuck Thistle up. he doesn't care about how badly it hurts and he either hopes that the pain will make Thistle stop resisting or that hurting and tormenting Thistle this way will drive him to summon the demon. possibly (probably) both.

i don't really have much of a thesis statement here, just i guess an exploration of my thoughts... Mithrun is deeply cruel to Thistle and it's quite easy to imagine that part of this is because he knows Thistle has no status and no powerful friends, that he feels no need to even pretend to treat Thistle as a person... one could also easily imagine that it's because he's trying to provoke Thistle into summoning the demon, and one could ALSO easily imagine that there's an element of self-loathing to it, that in a sense he's punishing Thistle for his own past

[twentyfivemiceinatrenchcoat]

YOU’RE AN ANGEL, I’M A DOG ; SATORU GOJO

synopsis; an upcoming exam has been stressing you out, and satoru’s pleas for you to take care of yourself fall on deaf ears. he takes matters into his own hands.

word count; 4.3k

contents; satoru gojo/reader, gn!reader, yan!gojo, as far as yanderes go he’s very mild i think (im sensitive u can trust me!!), mentions of blood, implied murder (not depicted!!), he threatens your professor w a knife lol, surprisingly fluffy??, gojo is soooo lovesick & smitten, he just wants his baby to live a happy life :( is that so wrong :((, also your parents love him <33 and he calls you honey <333 ideal man.

a/n; i blacked out & when i woke up this was in my drafts… mysterious. @kissxcore here u go alexis <33 one very smitten morally gray yan!gojo just for u!! i completely lost the plot halfway through but i had a lot of fun writing this!! :33 i don’t dabble in yan content at all so it was a fun lil challenge hehe, i hope it ended up . Somewhat .. decent…

satoru thinks you deserve everything good.

”haah…”

— the sigh spills into the air, like a dot of ink on paper, dripping with exhaustion; a palpable fatigue that has his heart clenching beneath his ribs.

just as he feared, you’re here. again. seated on the couch, in the living room, legs crossed and framed by flimsy strings of moonlight; illuminated only by the dim light of the laptop in front of you. carding through your hair, blinking sluggishly.

another sigh. deep, exasperated, from satoru this time. he keeps a single hand on his hip, brows furrowed in soft disappointment. 

”honey… what do you think you’re doing?”

you jolt, the sudden sound breaking you out of whatever trance you were previously in. when your gaze flits to his, craning your head to see him rest against the wall leading up to your bedroom, he thinks you look a little like a kid caught with their hand in the cookie jar.

it makes him smile. despite his disapproval.

”ah — satoru! it’s… um.” a moment passes. he can practically see the gears of your mind turning, searching for a good excuse. ”… not what it looks like?”

he clicks his tongue. ”nice try.”

then he’s walking towards you, in long strides, gliding across the room like a butterfly in search of nectar. from the sweetest flower there ever was.

even when said flower is still awake, past midnight, pulling an all-nighter despite his frequent advice not to. his very frequent, very thoughtful advice not to strain yourself until you just about pass out.

but you just won’t listen.

”’m disappointed in you, baby,” he huffs, just playful enough to ward off any genuine feelings of distress. he could never truly be disappointed in his baby. ”what did we say about studying this late, hm?”

a sheepish chuckle slips past your lips. satoru is standing in front of you, hands on his hips, raising a questioning eyebrow as you squirm. lighthearted, yes, but genuine. it makes you feel a little guilty.

”… sorry,” you breathe, closing the lid of your laptop. knowing he won’t let you stay up any longer. with the loss of light, your face becomes shrouded in darkness. ”just can’t sleep when i’m so stressed.”

at that, satoru makes a tiny noise — something worried, a little sad, from the base of his throat. a soft frown finds its way onto his lips, and he blinks the sleep away from his senses. plopping down beside you.

”i know. i’m not trying to lecture you,” he croons, reaching out to cradle the apple of your cheek. you melt into him like molten honey, easy and sweet. ”just worried. know you’re stressed.”

and he does. he does know — it’s all he’s been able to think about, these past few weeks. to his dismay, he’s even begun to grow used to this sight, used to finding you in the midst of working yourself to exhaustion. fighting the urge to sleep, slumped over your desk, or cooped up on the couch. staring into your laptop like it holds the secrets of the universe.

time and time again, he’s told you to take care of yourself. tried to coax you into relaxing, rubbing your sore shoulders and kissing the puffy skin beneath your eyes. but this exam is important — you’ve told him as much, more times than he can count. he doesn’t doubt that you’re right. 

of course you’d be stressed. he gets it.

still, though.

”but you know it’s not good, yeah? that it’ll just burn you out?” his thumb goes to smooth over the dark crescents beneath your eyes, gentle as a feather. ”we don’t want that, do we?”

you bite your lip. trapping it between your teeth. he knows you know. ”… yeah,” you admit, a flimsy little sigh on your tongue. ”it just feels easier to do this at night. don’t know why.”

”my little night owl.”

that makes you smile, a little, but it’s not enough to satisfy him. he curls an arm around your waist, and drags you into his lap; gentle, always gentle, like all that exists under your skin is made of porcelain. like the lines of your face form a string of words, a label of fragile: handle with care. he always does.

with his heartbeat by your ear, his warmth melting into yours, it’s easier to speak. a pressure on your chest that fades away. ”i’ll try not to do it again,” you murmur, biting back a soft yawn. nuzzling into his neck. ”promise. don’t wanna worry you…”

satoru softens. 

(always so good to him.)

”it’s fine, honey. i understand.” he smiles, smoothing down your spine, counting the bumps of vertebra that slide along his palm. ”don’t worry that pretty little head of yours over me, alright?”

in return for his comfort, you wriggle away, lifting your head to give him a smile. one of your many smiles, each one fervently cherished by him; the one you’re wearing now is tired, a soft curl of your lips, the kind that makes him want to lull you to sleep. just the sight alone makes the anxiety in his veins feel like a worthy investment.

he doesn’t tell you anything that could cause that joy to diminish. doesn’t tell you that he can’t sleep without you, that he can barely breathe knowing you’re this stressed all time. doesn’t tell you that he jolted awake with a sinking feeling of dread, a gaping pit in his stomach when he didn’t immediately feel the warmth of your skin against his. doesn’t tell you that he always, always assumes the worst.

satoru doesn’t tell you these things. it’s a safety measure, an act of love. a bundle of unvoiced syllables, woven into white lies, silky and sweet. tailor-made to put your aching mind at ease. 

satoru thinks you deserve everything good.

it’s a theory, of sorts, a train of thought. a hypothesis made manifest. after many years of pondering, he’s arrived at the following conclusion; you are all that’s good. therefore, it only follows that you deserve everything that’s good, all of it and more. satoru believes you deserve every single thing your little heart desires — and he’s determined to give it to you.

so he’s been worried.

it’s not that he doesn’t trust you. he knows you’ll ace the exam, knows you’ll do your very best, knows you’ll make him proud. you always do. you aren’t the problem, no, never.

he just doesn’t trust your professor. 

that unfair, stuck-up, incompetent professor who’d fail his students just for being a couple minutes late, who curates his exams to be as convoluted as humanly possible. you and your friends are starting to suspect he just likes berating people for a living. satoru knows it all, he’s heard it all, of course he has. satoru pays attention to everything, when it comes to you. he knows all about your professor, the man who’s been making your studies pure hell for the past semester.

it makes his blood boil. steady, ruminating, hot and heavy in his veins. a rivulet of lava.

(it was only a matter of time.)

satoru is a teacher too; he knows that type. one that has no business being a teacher, in the first place, one no student deserves to be subjected to. he’s met more of them in his career than he could even begin to count. the thought of one of his own students being at the mercy of someone so incompetent makes his skin itch.

and the thought of you, seated on the couch, crying and sniffling when he comes home because none of the exam questions made enough sense for you to even try —

it makes satoru want to claw his skin off.

it makes that tiny, tiny cavern in his heart extend, widen, like a maw, swallowing up his liver and lungs and sense of morality. an emptiness begging to be filled. 

there’s only one way to satiate it.

so he plants a wet kiss on your forehead, ruffles your hair, tucks you into bed and waits until you fall asleep. deep and heavy, a slumber you won’t wake up from anytime soon. he presses his lips to your forehead one more time — for good measure.

then he grabs his coat and slips outside.

the moon is visible through the window.

a thin crescent, nailed next to the dim stars, leaking a dream-like fluorescent shine; illuminating the office, so quiet he can hear those erratic breaths spill out, one by one. a heavy, heavy silence, thick enough to spread like butter over toast. 

(ah, that’s right — he forgot to buy the butter you asked for this morning. no wonder he feels so out of sorts. he’ll have to grab it on his way back.)

”who… w — what are — ?”

satoru stays silent. lips pursed, eyes keen, burning into the back of the man in front of him. close, almost chest to back, enough to have him scowling in displeasure. 

just being in his presence makes satoru feel a little sick. 

he keeps the blade pressed right beneath his adam’s apple, a silver glimmer in an office painted blue and gray. not enough to sink into his skin, but enough to have his heartbeat hammering, enough that satoru can practically feel those rapid flutters of life. brushing against his gloved hand.

he gets straight to the point. voice muffled by the fabric covering his mouth, low enough that it’s barely even audible. he’s careful, about this kind of thing. there’s a delicacy to the ill intent, something he’d be a little enamored with if it weren’t for the compass stuffed into his ribs — the compass that tells him this is wrong.

he just can’t bring himself to care.

”the upcoming exam.” his voice sends a shiver down the man’s spine. satoru can feel it. ”don’t fail a single student.”

silence. pure silence, suffocating them, tangling itself into the air. satoru can practically taste it — fear, familiar, that pang of panic. a ticking time-bomb. the knife stays pressed against warm skin, pushing, sinking, just a little, a drop of red against his pale throat. 

it’s enough to get your professor to make a little noise, one that vaguely resembles a whine. like that of a small animal, rolling over on its belly, eager to play dead. no word is spoken in reply, but he nods, just barely, a nervous tremble of his head.

satoru hums, approving. ”good.” he doesn’t loosen his grip. ”there’s a particular student i’m worried about. marked them down in the catalogue... i’m counting on you.”

another noise. a grunt of affirmation, a silent plea — satoru allows that fear to seep into his own bones, just a little, just to get a taste of it. cold on his tongue. he wonders if this is what helplessness feels like.

then he takes a step back. slow, tentative, dragging the knife with him. not before parting his lips once more. ”don’t turn around,” he warns. ”i’ll be back if there are any complications. this’ll be our little secret, hm?”

the man in front of him doesn’t say a thing. frozen in fear, paralyzed, not moving an inch. a fly trapped in his web. it’s a relief.

before he exits the room, satoru puts the final nail in the coffin. just in case. ”i happen to know what school your daughter goes to.” he waits for a flinch, and it comes almost instantly. like clockwork. “remember that.”

it’s an empty threat. your professor doesn’t know that, though. he doesn’t know that satoru knows his daughter, that he walks past her preschool almost every morning on his way to work. that she waves to him whenever he passes by, and that he makes it a point to always wave back. a little troublemaker; the rowdiest of utahime’s preschoolers. she has a bubbly laugh, and just lost one of her milk teeth. she was giddy when she showed him, a bout of giggles spilling from her lips as he cooed and ruffled her hair. 

he wouldn’t lay a finger on her. 

but your professor doesn’t know that, hasn’t got a single clue, and satoru delights in the fear that must be running through his veins. down his spine, crawling into every narrow of his skeleton, making a home for itself that he’ll never quite be able to root out.

a gulp. satoru hears it, in the quiet of nightfall, just before he shuts the door behind him. good.

the rest of the evening is a blur. satoru gets home, relieved to find you still asleep, and tucks you into his chest. makes a mental reminder to order your favorite take out tomorrow; a little reward for your hard work.

finally, he can sleep easy. knowing you’ll get what you deserve. 

three weeks later, satoru places his hand on the familiar doorknob in front of him, dragging his weight behind him. blinking sluggishly. 

there’s a sinking feeling in his chest, weighing him down — like an anchor tied to his liver. a compass, tucked between his fourth and fifth rib, one that’ll always stay lodged right there. he’s learned to grow used to it, a natural consequence, a sign that his humanity is still intact. 

that doesn’t make it any less bothersome, though.

(ridding the world of a pest shouldn’t make him feel dirty. especially when he felt nothing but contempt for the pest in question, for the way he whistled as you walked by, the words he spewed before satoru met his eye. vile. putrid. why should he feel guilty for wiping a stain off the pavement?

it does make him feel dirty, though. a sinking feeling in his chest.)

there’s nothing to be done about it. satoru swallows the unpleasant taste on his tongue, and drags the door open, closing it behind him with a softness he reserves for you alone.

and there you are.

on the couch, farther away, already looking his way — lips instantly curling up into what he knows will be a smile. this time, it’s laced with excitement. one of his personal favorites. his gaze devours the joy in your features, the glimpse he gets of your teeth, that familiar crinkle of your eyes. 

you’re smiling. at him. you smile and his world wakes up, it’s dyed in different shades of blue, it’s brimming with life and love and something too good not to kill for. you smile and everything is right, good, worth it. you smile and it's as if the blood has been washed off his hands.

suddenly, all is well again. satoru exhales a blissful little breath.

“‘m home, honey,” he grins, a light pink dusting his cheeks, hanging his coat up before turning to face you. arms wide open. “did you miss me?”

his heartbeat stutters when you practically engulf him, all giddy giggles and that perfect smile, nuzzling into the crook of his neck. “mhm,” is what you chirp, pressing kisses down his collarbone, and he has to bite down on his lip to stop the shivers trailing down his spine. he tastes iron, but laps it up with a coo. sickly-sweet.

“missed you too, precious,” he purrs. “sorry i was gone for so long — had to take care of something.” 

he cups the back of your skull with his palm, large and crafted just to hold you, and marvels at how much you trust him. how you’re melting into his chest, fitting into every crevice of his heart. he wants to keep you there forever. forever and ever, always within reach, always close enough to touch. 

but he also wants you to be happy. he wants to see you run away, wherever the wind takes you, if only so he’ll get to feel you jump into his arms again, when you’ve had your fill of the world. when you come home to him, where you both belong.

satoru would never cage you. never, never, never. he wants you to enjoy your life — confining you wouldn’t do any good, would only stifle that pretty smile he loves so dearly. he wants your world to be large, brimming with life, blooming with fervor, wants the air to be clear enough for your beautiful lungs. he couldn’t build a world for you, here, in this apartment. no matter how big or luxurious. 

so his only option is to bend the world into a kinder shape — twist and mold until it forms a path good enough for you to follow.

(it’s worth it, he knows, he’ll always know. it’s worth it to see that smile.)

“is that a new coat?” you ask, naive and innocent, and it breaks him out of his thoughts, attention wired to the lilt of your voice.

“yeah.” it’s stylish, expensive, a nice shade of black. he had to throw the last one away. “looks nice, right? i’ll get you the same one, pretty.”

“you don’t have to, toru!” you hurriedly exclaim, knowing he’ll jump at the opportunity to spoil you. “i like the one i have now!”

satoru pouts. a soft huff, right by your ear. “you don’t wanna wear matching coats?” he feigns sadness, scratching softly at your scalp, drinking up the little purrs that bubble up in your throat. 

and you giggle. you giggle and all he can think is worth it, worth it, worth it. a stained coat or two means nothing. the blood on his hands is just insurance. 

“well, when you put it like that…” you shift a little, curling your arms around his neck, breathing him in. he wonders if you can smell the cleaning detergent. “i guess i wouldn’t mind a new coat.”

and he grins. “right? want me to buy you new shoes while i’m at it? some jewelry?” he peppers kisses down your neck, amusement laced in his voice. “the whole store?”

again, those giggles. again and again. he laps them up like fine wine. “okay, that’s too much.”

“but you deserve it!” he whines, sickeningly sweet. sick to his stomach with love. “been working so hard, my angel.”

and, suddenly — you light up. his little firefly. brightening, inhaling a giddy breath. pulling away, a little, and he does his best to bite back the frown on his face. you’re practically beaming, sunshine personified, eyes glittering with giddy joy.

“right! i almost forgot!” 

then you’re skipping away, happily, to retrieve your phone. and he knows what you’re going to show him, but still feigns surprise when he sees the score on your exam, that perfect 100 on the screen. still makes an expression of shock that he knows will get you to laugh, still picks you up and spins you around and tells you how proud he is.

he almost, almost feels bad, seeing you smile so wide; at what you assume to be the fruits of your own labour. almost feels ashamed, knowing that perfect 100 wouldn’t exist without the knife at your professor’s throat.

but, then again, this is how it should be. those numbers are the fruits of your own labour, because satoru is a part of you. and you deserve it, deserve it more than anyone — he knows you would have gotten it, even without his help, if your professor was competent enough to see your brilliance. 

satoru smiles. he is proud of you. and this is exactly how it should be. he’s just bending the world into its rightful shape, cutting strings from a wrongly woven web, righting the wrongs of the people around you.

you, you, you. the only thing that exists.

all of him is for you.

”i knew you could do it. never doubted you for a second, baby,” he smiles, so wide his cheeks hurt, and you return it with a kiss to his jaw. 

”thank you. i’m just so relieved,” you exhale a breath, heavy, and it’s like he can practically see the stress melting from your shoulders and eyes. worth it, worth it, worth it. ”gosh. i’m gonna sleep like the dead tonight.”

”as you should,” satoru chirps, pinching your side. softly, brimming with fondness. ”but before that, we’re gonna celebrate. all day. and tomorrow too!”

another smile coaxed from your lips; this time, it’s a little bit shy. bashful, at the praise, his endless excitement. so precious he wants to kiss you breathless. give you all the air in his lungs.

so precious that he forgets about everything else. 

this is what you always do to him; wrap him up in a blanket of your love, cloud his veins with a nectar so sweet he takes the leap into your arms without a second thought. a foolish, lovesick butterfly, sticking to a single rose; dripping with honey, overflowing. the butterfly is too drunk on love to care. 

you’re his flower, his joy, the most useful form of anesthesia. with you in his veins, on his mind, your lips on his jaw — satoru can pretend that his hands are clean. that they always have been.

it all slips from his mind. your professor, the creep who catcalled you yesterday, that one classmate you’ve been complaining about recently. he forgets that they even exists, and satoru thinks that must be what love is: something that narrows your world down until you can make a home out of it. 

(something worth holding onto, no matter the cost.)

as always, it’s your voice that snaps him out of the trance he’s in. turning around at the sound of your call, the orpheus to your eurydice, too in love to save you from himself. you’re both getting ready to head out, dressing up for a well-deserved date. 

satoru feels himself smile. he does the dirty work, and you get to reap the rewards. heaven on earth.

“oh, by the way! would you want to have dinner with my parents tomorrow?” you meet his absent gaze with a tilt of your head. “they’ve been asking about you again. it’s such a headache, seriously.”

satoru giggles, barely containing how delighted he is. raising a playful brow. “oh? grumpy that you aren’t the favorite child anymore, hm?”

“okay, first of all —“ you stifle a giggle, pulling a drawer open, rummaging through it. freshly washed clothes. he washes most of your things. “you aren’t their child. and second of all —“

“— yet.”

a pause. 

satoru watches your gaze flick over to him, then back to the drawer, collecting yourself. a cute flush to your cheeks. “… whatever.” you clear your throat. “second of all — i don’t like how much they like you. what kinda spell did you put them under? it’s always satoru this, satoru that!”

a huff fills the air, and you mutter something that sounds a little like mocking, an obnoxiously imitated where’s satoru? that makes him chuckle into his fist. 

he shrugs. “i’m just a natural charmer, y’know? and, for the record; i would love to have dinner with them.” he sends you a wink, playful, and you roll your eyes. “are you joining us?”

a bout of laughter pushes past your lips, and satoru thinks he could die happy — just soaking up the joy that spills from out your throat. he wishes he could live in it, paint your house in it, wear it. he wants your joy to be all he ever feels. he feels sick at the idea of ever being out of earshot for it.

“yes, i’m joining you.” your scoff is dripping with humour. ”i’d hate to be the fourth wheel, but it is what it is.”

satoru stifles a grin. ”lucky me. three beauties all to myself,” he drawls, a seductive lilt to his voice, just to hear that little noise you always make with the back of your throat. vaguely disgusted.

”you’re so gross.”

a coo. like the buzzing of a bee. ”don’t be jealous, honey. know you’re my favorite, don’t you?” satoru smiles — more sincere than you’ll ever know. ”could never love anyone else.”

”so my parents are in second place?” you quirk a brow, amusement lacing your words, and he clicks his tongue. 

”well, they made you. i’d have to be a fool not to worship artists of such caliber.” 

”charmer.”

”yours.” the word is a knife at his throat, a stain on his coat, a love so heavy it’ll burn him alive. ”only yours.”

and again, you smile. all he can think is that you deserve everything, everything he could ever give you. it’s all he can think as you go about your day, as he leads you outside, as he watches that flicker of joy dance inside your iris. as he watches you walk wherever your heart takes you.

the thought remains when you return home, when you wrap yourselves up in blankets and he throws a leg over your waist and you curl an arm around his ribcage. it’s all he can think. 

satoru was born to be of service — to someone, to the world, to something or another. he was born to carry a weight on his back, so why not bear the weight of your burdens?

all he wants is to protect you. all he’ll ever need is that smile on your face. he was always bound to be just this: a dog at your heels, a halo around your head, the watchful eye keeping you safe from everything rotten in this world. he’s the butterfly, the spider, the web itself. and he’ll never let you be tangled up in it.

he was born to be of service to you. so service you he will, until it all comes back to bite him.

“satoruuu — stop stealing the blanket!”

he prays it never will.

[sunarc]

Rule Break

Synopsis: Nanami has one rule: never fuck a client. You may just be his one exception

Cw: trainer Nanami, semi public sex, reader is a big flirt, oral f receiving, fingering, unprotected sex, breeding,2.9k words

Nanami would consider himself a professional man. He knows his job can get a bit hot and sweaty sometimes, but he tries his best to keep his composure. He has a rule of his own: never fuck a client. It seems like a silly rule, but one would be surprised by how many trainers have had relationships with their clients. He likes to think he’s great at his one rule that is, until he takes you on as a client.

Something about you makes all the blood in his body rush to his lower half. You’re so beautiful, he whispers to himself each time you come in for a gym session. He’s never known himself to lose composure the way he does when you’re near.

“One more squat for me, you got this." His praise filled your ears as you lowered into your last squat.

“That’s it, good job” His clapping echoed in the half-empty gym as you finished putting the weight down.

You smiled at the tall, muscular man before high-fiving him. Nanami wouldn’t be wrong in believing you had an interest in him. Your eyes were always glued to him in ways he couldn’t really describe. The way you would lean into him when he showed you how to do something, or how you always stayed a bit later, asking him questions he was sure you already knew the answer to.

"So, Mr.Nanami, I was wondering if you could show me some more exercises for the legs.” You continued to explain how you wanted to strengthen them.

Nanami wanted so desperately to focus on your words, but his eyes could only seem to follow the sweat that dripped from your neck down to your breast. The zipper to your sports bra was down just enough so he could see how the fabric squeezed your chest. His mind was lost in thought, thinking of what it would feel like to push his length between them. He couldn’t help but think of how pretty they would look covered in his cum. Would you want a taste, or would you just let him cover you in his seed? Or maybe you’d prefer if he-

“Mr.Nanami?” You asked, titling your head with a faux look of innocence. “The leg workout?”

"O-ofcourse, I-um, yes, my apologies I have a lot on my mind today,” he excused his zoning out.

Nanami shook his head, ashamed at how yet again he had lost self-control. He was never like this, really. He almost wanted to plead with you to find another trainer. How could he possibly focus when his mind was constantly being plagued with thoughts of what you’d look like without your pink matching gym set. 

His body carried him over to a leg machine. He took a deep breath, trying to gather himself as he set up the machine to show you how to use it.

“I’m going to teach you about cable kickbacks.” He began lifting his leg to show you an example, “Now this focuses on the glutes."

His fingers pointed to the muscle. His eyes watched as your gaze scanned down his form to his toned butt with a soft smirk. He’d just brush it off as your excitement for a new workout.

"Alright, you try." His voice wavered, and you could swear there was a pink blush covering his cheeks.

You followed as he did, replicating the exercise. His hand smoothed against your lower back, angling your body.

“You feel it?” His voice was deep as he questioned you. You nodded your head, too focused on the pain of the exercise to speak.

"Yeah, just like that." His palm pushed deeper into your lower back, while his other hand focused on holding your core to keep you steady. Your eyes met his, and you could feel his gaze shift from professional to lust-filled. 

“Is that how you want me to do it, Mr.Nanami?” you questioned.

Anyone passing by would assume the question was referring to the workout, but from the look in your eyes, Nanami knew it had nothing to do with your actions.

"Yeah,” he breathed, his eyes still focusing on yours. “Just like that."

Nanami was very professional, but he’d be damned if he was going to miss matching your energy. You finished your last rep with ease. The tension in the air between the two of you was thick. The room was now empty, with everyone gone or preparing to leave.

“I guess our gym session is over. Would you care to walk me to the locker room? I have a few more questions before I go.” You said with an innocent smile.

Nanami nodded his head. Of course, he’d be willing to walk you. Any extra time he could get to spend with you, he’d take it.

You walked at a slow pace as you questioned him about what protein shakes he liked the best. Nanami had heard these questions before, but he’d be more than willing to entertain you for a bit more. You made it to the locker room and turned to face his tall figure.

“You did really great today, I’ll see you tomorrow for arms,” he said, giving a pinched smile before turning to walk away.

"Wait,” you called, grabbing his wrist.

He turned around wide-eyed

“I was wondering if you would be able to help me stretch before I go,” you whispered, suddenly feeling small at the advancement.

Nanami’s brain was wracked at the question, wondering if he should. What harm could a little stretching do? After all, he is your trainer, it’s a trainer's job to help their clients.

"Of course, I can help you do some stretches before I close up.” He led you to a room with privacy windows in the back.

The room was one you had never been in before. There were mats all over with a mirror wall. You picked up a mat and placed it near his own.

“We’ll start with a forward fold." He stood behind you with his hand on your waist while he guided your upper half downward. You folded into the stretch and pushed your ass against him. Nanami let out a low grunt before helping you to come back up. Your back pressed against his chest. You stared into the mirror, watching how he looked down at you with his lip between his teeth.

“What’s the next stretch, Mr.Nanami?”

His hands danced against your waist as he helped you maneuver through each stretch. Nanami’s breath grew heavier with each stretch. You seemed to be in a teasing mood today as you continued to press your ass against him each chance you got. Nanami didn’t think he’d be able to last much longer. The amount of pent-up energy in him was beginning to be too much to bear.

“Just lay down for me,” he whispered.

His hand dragged against your leg as he lifted it up and pressed it into your chest. He leaned his body down onto your leg to push you deeper into the stretch.

“I’m really flexible if you can't tell,” you giggled as you came face to face with him.

You were going to be the death of him. He could feel a bulge growing in his shorts, and he knew you could feel it too.

“How does that feel?” he asked, breathing in your scent.

You were so close to him. His eyes drifted down to your plump lips, memorizing the way your lips curved so perfectly into a smirk.

“It feels really good, sir,” you said softly. "Harder, please,” you were daring him. Your words were laced with nothing but pure filth.

Nanami leaned deeper into you, so close that his nose was almost pressed against yours.

“Like that.” His voice was nearing a growl.

He had a rule, one that he was willing to break for the first time.

“Just like that, sir."

Nanami silently asked himself for forgiveness because his next action would be very unlike himself. He leaned down and pressed his lips against yours. They were just as soft as he had imagined. You tasted sweet. Your lips danced against his in a hungry, passionate way. His hand moved to your waist, holding your body still as he grinded down on you. You let out a soft moan at the feeling of his clothed length pressing against your core. 

“Fuck” he whispered as he pulled away.

You let out a whimper at the sudden loss of his touch. He stood up and covered his flustered face as he tried to make a gap.

“Your rule, Kento,” he breathed out the words to himself.

You sat up on your elbows as you watched him pace back and forth.

"God, you don’t understand what you do to me,” he groaned as he turned to you, dragging his hands down his face.

You sat silently with a smirk playing on your lips.

“You’re enjoying this, aren’t you?" He ranted. His nose flared up as he stared at you. "I have a rule, you know.”

You sat up on your knees to face him.

“We don’t have to call it breaking the rule.” You played with the zipper on your sports bra, slowly dragging it lower. “Why don’t we just call it a little after-hour stretching?”

Nanami walked over to you, closing the gap.

“Just some stretching between a trainer and his trainee, right?” He was making an attempt to convince himself; it was not a rule break. He’s just being a kind trainer and helping his client stretch in all ways possible.

“Just a trainer and his trainee,” you repeated his words, and Nanami kneeled to be at eye level with you.

His hand softly grabbed your neck, pulling you in for a kiss. It had only been seconds, and he somehow missed the way you tasted. His tongue slipped past your lips and massaged against yours. You were everything Nanami dreamed you would be. The kiss was something he wanted to relive for the first time over and over again.

He bit his lip as his heart pounded in his chest. His cock strained against his shorts. He wanted to memorize every part of you, from the way your chest rose as he squeezed your breast to the way your hips rocked back and forth, desperate for friction.

“Lay down for me, pretty.”

Wanting to please him, you did as you were told. Nanami freed his cock from his shorts, and your eyes went wide. He was big. You were almost worried he wouldn’t fit inside. He stroked his cock a few times before straddling you.

He pushed his cock underneath your bra and squeezed his length between your breasts. He let out a low groan as his cock squeezed between the tight space. 

“Oh fuck baby,” his eyes fluttered shut as he inched his cock back and forth.

You let out a soft giggle and stuck your tongue out, swiveling around the tip of his cock each time he rocked his hips forward.

“You’re so fucking beautiful,” he groaned. “Taking my cock so well,” he breathed.

“You think you deserve my cock stretching your tight hole?” he asked.

You nodded your head as your eyes looked up at his dark ones.

“Use your words. Closed mouths don’t get fed.” His words were demanding.

“Please fuck me, sir. I need it so bad,” you whimpered. “My pussy’s so wet thinking of you,” your words died down into a whisper as if embarrassed by the lewdness of it all.

Nanami chuckled as he unzipped your bra, freeing your chest. He leaned down and placed your nipple between his teeth, nibbling and sucking softly. You chanted out soft pleas as his tongue swiveled around your nipple.

His tongue moved against your skin, sucking and kissing as he inched down towards your core.

“Don’t get shy on me, pretty girl.” His fingers curled underneath the fabric of your tights, pulling them down to expose your core. “You were just begging me to stretch you out.”

He placed a soft kiss just above your core. You sat on your elbows, watching as he methodically planted kisses around your heat, just barely grazing your clit. You felt shivers run through your body at the anticipation. His hand pushed your legs up to your chest so that he could get a good view of how wet the thought of him was really making you.

“Hold your legs up for me, okay, princess.”

His dark eyes looked up to meet yours as his tongue licked a long, slow strip between your folds.

“All this just for me?” His warm breath fanned against your core.

You let out a low mewl as his tongue flicked against your clit messily. Nanami was a very neat and well-kept man, but the way he was eating you out was the complete opposite of what you knew him to be. He messily slurped your juices. You turned away, shutting your eyes at the sound. You couldn’t believe how he was making you lose your mind. He dipped two fingers inside, curling them as he dragged them in and out.

"Aww,” he cooed. “Don’t look away. Don't you want to watch me make this pussy cream on my tongue?”

Nanami’s words made you feel as if you were about to explode. His fingers pressed in and out of you, forming a rhythm. Your legs trembled as you neared a release. His tongue messily lapped at your warmth as he groaned against your core.

“I'm so close, oh g-” You were cut off by your own moan.

Nanami’s fingers curled inside of you as he massaged a spongy spot inside of you.

"Oh, there it is,” he groaned.

You let out a loud gasp as your body shook from your orgasm. Your eyes rolled back as he continued fucking his fingers into you.

"Mmh, you're so pretty when you make a mess for me."

He pulled away and moved to meet your lips.

“You want a taste, baby?” He leaned down to press his lips against yours. You were still shaking from your orgasm as you kissed back weakly. He held your legs in place, folding you into a mating press as his cock dipped into your slippery hole without warning. You let out a gasp, but it was easily swallowed by Nanami as he continued kissing and sucking your tongue. His thrusts were long and slow as he allowed you to adjust to his size.

“Such a good girl taking my cock like this,” he groaned the words against your lips.

Your body was trembling as your mouth hung open, letting soft whimpers fall past your lips.

“This is what you wanted right?” He leaned down to whisper the silky words in your ear, “You wanted me to stretch you out right?"

His thrusts picked up speed, and you couldn't help the lewd moans dripping off your tongue. His cock glided against your gummy walls, leaving you speechless. He was taking his claim on you, making you his. No other man would be able to make you feel this good. He wanted you to remember this, the way his cock dragged in and out of you, the relentless pace of his hips slamming against yours, the way his warm tongue ran up your neck to your ear, sending shivers through your body.

“Yes, yes, yes,” you chanted.

“Then why aren’t you thanking me?” he growled

A string of thank-yous spilled past your lips. You were in a daze, stuck in obedience. He had you wrapped around his finger.

“There’s my good girl,” he cooed.

His cock felt so thick, spreading you out. Your mind was blurred, only able to focus on how his cock was able to reach places you had never explored before. He plunged his cock in and out of you, groaning at the sounds of your cunt squelching for him.

"Fuck, you don’t understand how long I've wanted this,” he breathed the words into your ear. “All those times I thought about sinking my cock into this soaking hole.”

His words were going straight to your core.

“I always thought about how badly this pussy needed me, how you needed my cum to fill you to the brim,” he grunted.

You squeezed your eyes shut, feeling yourself growing closer to the edge.

“Please, sir i- Please can I cum?” You whined desperately, pleading with him.

"Oh, you want to cum, huh? Go ahead, princess, make a mess for me. Show me how pretty this pussy looks cumming on my cock.”

Your orgasm flooded over you like a wave. Your body shook as your hands gripped onto Nanami, dragging your nails down his skin.

"Oh, that’s it, good girl,” he whispered as you trembled, releasing all over him. “Pussy’s squeezing me so tight, you ready for me, baby? Where do you want it?”

Your eyes rolled back as he continued fucking you through your orgasm.

"Inside, please," you slurred, barely able to think straight.

Nanami chuckled at hearing how out of your mind you were.

“My favorite place,” he dragged his cock roughly in and out of you, grunting with each thrust. He held your body close as he released inside, groaning at how you clenched around him.

He pulled out, smiling softly at the way his cum drooled from your hole. He stuffed his fingers inside, pushing the cum back in, before gently putting your clothes on. He held you softly as you calmed down, catching your breath.

“I think we may need to do some stretching after our sessions more often."

[suzukiblu]

Hey kids, I've got some more "Billy adopts Conner and it actually goes pretty good!" behind this here read-more. You know, if that's a thing you're into. 👀

“I don’t know what names are good,” Superboy says finally, his voice stiff. “Or sound good. I never even heard music before Kid Flash was–I just don’t know what sounds are good. Or whatever.” 

“It doesn’t matter if it’s ‘good’,” Billy says, wondering why Superboy cares so much about his name “sounding” good and also why Cadmus is apparently the worst. They never even played music for him? What, at all? He makes an immediate mental note to figure out how to set up the wireless speakers Batman had delivered and, like, Spotify or something. “You just have to like it.” 

“Oh,” Superboy says, just barely frowning again. “Are you . . . sure?” 

“Yeah,” Billy says firmly. “I’m definitely sure.” 

“Oh,” Superboy says again, then looks down at his feet. Billy feels bad for him and is going to set up like, a million different playlists the first chance he gets. Just like a lot of different stuff, so Superboy can figure out what he likes.

“Do you still want suggestions?” he asks. “I promise I won’t pick anything that sounds bad.” 

“. . . fine,” Superboy says, still looking at his feet. It’s not a resounding “yes” or anything, but it’s no a “no”, Billy’s pretty sure, and he does want to help Superboy pick a good name, so . . . it’s probably okay to try again, he thinks. 

“Okay,” he says, trying to think of something really good and not just random stuff this time. Like–names are important, and Superboy obviously cares about what other people are gonna think of what he picks, so . . . 

Superboy keeps not looking at him. Billy tries not to worry about it. Maybe Superboy just doesn’t like looking at people at all. He didn’t make eye contact with Kid Flash’s parents while they were here either, and barely even with Kid Flash. Which makes sense, he guesses, because why would someone used to telepathic communication really feel a need to look at anyone’s face? Superboy probably doesn’t have the . . . instinct, or whatever. 

Well, it’s fine if he doesn’t, Billy figures. Either he’ll learn it or he’ll just not like it either way, and neither of those options are a big deal or anything. The name thing and coming up with rules and stuff and helping Superboy feel comfortable are way more important right now. 

"Um . . . actually, my mom's name was Marilyn," Billy suggests a little shyly as an old idea occurs to him. It’s been a while since he really thought about it, honestly, but . . . "So you could be 'Lynn', maybe? If that's not too weird? I used to think that if I ever had a kid I'd name them after my mom, 'cuz my dad's name was Clarence and that's pretty old-fashioned, though I guess if you were a girl you could've just been 'Claire', so . . . well, maybe Clarence could be your middle name, actually? If you like it, I mean." 

Superboy . . . pauses. Frowns at the floor. 

"Why would you name me that?" he asks skeptically. "You might have an actual kid someday and want to use it for them." 

"I have an actual kid right now," Billy says reasonably. "Why wouldn't I use it for you?" 

Superboy sits very, very still, and doesn't say anything. Billy starts worrying that maybe that was weird or too much and maybe he's already the worst dad ever and maybe now Superboy thinks he's weird and too much and the worst dad ever and is just gonna get up and go straight back to Kid Flash's house and never even talk to him again or–

"I count as an actual kid to you?" Superboy asks, his voice completely neutral. 

Oh, Billy realizes. 

Man, he's dumb sometimes. 

"Yeah," he says firmly. "You definitely count." 

". . . okay," Superboy says, looking at the wall. "'Lynn' works." 

"Awesome," Billy says, smiling at him as wide as he thinks he can get away with. He doesn't want to look fake or like he's trying too hard or to be overwhelming or anything like that. He just wants to make it obvious that he's happy right now. "Nice to meet you, Lynn Clarence Batson." 

"Nice to meet you too," Superboy says–Lynn says–glancing sidelong at him just a little bit hesitantly. "Um . . . Dad." 

Billy grins. 

Okay. Not the worst dad ever after all, then.

[odyssean-flower]

Title: What if you, like, gave Neuvillette a shoulder rub

I wanted to include this scene in the chapter but ultimately decided to save it for a later one. tbh i stopped before getting to the "good" part but i still hope you enjoy it

You gently nudged Neuvillette. “Hey, how about I give you a shoulder rub?”

“Pardon me, Madame?” his eyes widened, and he shook his head slightly as though he thought he heard wrong. “Did you say ‘shoulder rub’?”

You couldn’t blame him for his surprise. It was terribly forward of you to offer. But, you thought that it would be good for the both of you.

“We still have time before the meeting starts. I used to do it for my parents and the old folks back home, so I’m quite good at it, if I do say so myself.” Seeing the hesitance in his eyes, you added, “Don’t worry, my hands will only stay on your shoulders. I won’t touch you anywhere else.”

Neuvillette glanced down at your hands for the briefest of seconds, then looked back at your face. “Very well, I accept your offer,” he said, still sounding a bit hesitant. You tried to give him a reassuring smile, but it didn’t seem to have the right effect. You should really practice these things more.

You walked around the couch to stand behind him, then took off your gloves and draped them over the back of the seat. He twitched a little when you placed your hands on his broad shoulders. You should have asked him to take off his robes, but it was supposed to be a short massage anyways.

“Tell me if I’m hurting you,” you said as you kneaded your fingers into his shoulder muscles. My goodness, he really needed this, you thought. You had to use all your fingers just to work out one single knot. Thinking back to his late nights in his study, you felt a rush of guilt. He works too hard. I should have offered to do this a long time ago.

Neuvillette was motionless as you worked. If it weren’t for the slow rise and fall of his shoulders, you would have thought that you were massaging a statue.

“Um…does it feel good?” you asked after a short period of silence. You had the feeling he was holding his breath.

“…Yes,” there was the slightest tremor in his voice. He cleared his throat, “Yes, it feels I’ve…never experienced something like this before. You’re quite skilled at this, Madame.”

“Thank you, but I’m just an amateur. You should look into visiting a professional masseuse for a full body massage. I’ve never been to one myself, but I heard you’ll feel like a completely new person after you use their services.” If this was how stiff his shoulders were, you could only imagine how it was for the rest of his body. “I heard they use aromatic oils and other things like that to help you relax. A lot of the higher-end spas have strict confidentiality policies, so you don’t have to worry about your privacy.” You were repeating what you’ve read during your honeymoon research.

[phoenixkaptain]

A story like Thousand Autumns is very subtle in its romance.

Shen Qiao has only ever known his sect. He knows it very well, because of this fact. He knows the people, he knows the rules, he knows the daily doings and who is doing them. He knows every blade of grass and every stone. He’s like a lonely mountain flower, on the highest peak, unseen by any but a few birds and unknowing that there’s more it might never know.

When he finds himself away from his sect for the first time, he’s confused. At most, he’s gone to the base of the mountain, maybe the fields surrounding that, but no further. The flower was plucked and tossed aside.

For a man stumbling blindly in the world, literally and figuratively, there really isn’t a better guide than one that knows just about everything. And that’s, without a doubt, Yan Wushi.

Yan Wushi has lived longer than Shen Qiao, has been more places than Shen Qiao, and has fought more battles than Shen Qiao. Yan Wushi is the perfect example of something out of reach even for someone out of reach. He’s the only one who could answer any questions asked of him, but especially the questions that Shen Qiao would want to ask him.

And there’s no question in my mind that Yan Wushi doesn’t fall for Shen Qiao at first sight, but he’s certainly attracted to him. Not in an overtly sexual or emotional way, but Yan Wushi, the way his character is set up? It’s impossible for him not to be fascinated by Shen Qiao.

He knows Shen Qiao is the very picture of a peerless immortal. He’s well aware that Shen Qiao is considered untouchable by even the people closest to Shen Qiao. He’s most aware that Shen Qiao is Qi Fengge’s (coughhndisputedcough) favourite disciple, and honestly that’s enough for him to overwhemingly want to mess with Shen Qiao.

There are a lot of reasons for Yan Wushi to fall for Shen Qiao. Most of the people in the novel fall for Shen Qiao, after all, there is a precedent.

But the one I’ve seen questioned is Shen Qiao’s affection for Yan Wushi. Where does it come from? When did it start? Does Shen Qiao even fucking like that asshole?

The easy answer is: yes, he does. The novel tells us that. Shen Qiao, despite everything, does fall for Yan Wushi’s, um, “charms” in the end. This is made clear.

But why? A thousand voices cry out. Why the fuck would any reasonable person like Yan goddamn Wushi in any capacity?

Well, there’s your first mistake. Shen Qiao is not a reasonable person.

Shen Qiao as a character is absolutely terrifying. He could absolutely destroy the world given half the inclination, but he just doesn’t want to. He’s already considered unmatched before he’s pushed unceremoniously off of a mountain, and his journey only increases his strength. He isn’t quite equal to Yan Wushi, but he’s the only person Yan Wushi ever sees as equal to himself.

Shen Qiao’s best and worst trait is his patience. He’s unwavering. He really just embodies taoism, especially as it’s presented in the novels. He is the picture of a river that doesn’t stray from its path.

Which is why it’s hard for him to reconcile his own attraction to Yan Wushi, but let’s all be clear here. Yan Wushi absolutely starts seducing Shen Qiao on day fucking one. If he could’ve (if Qi Fengge hadn’t been there) he would’ve tried to eat that cabbage when it was just a little sprout. Shen Qiao is unpracticed in most social interactions, to be frank, but he’s especially unused to romance and Yan Wushi really is his first introduction to being hit on.

Yan Wushi is far from good, at really any point, to anybody but especially to Shen Qiao. But that doesn’t particularly matter because Shen Qiao chooses to forgive him, again and again. And I really think, after giving Shen Qiao to a confirmed terrible, awful person who has already promised to do terrible thing to Shen Qiao, that Shen Qiao himself wouldn’t forgive literally anyone else for doing that. And he shouldn’t, because it was really fucked up, but that still doesn’t matter because Shen Qiao ultimately DOES forgive Yan Wushi.

What am I saying? I’m saying that Shen Qiao fell for Yan Wushi first. It is the only way the story makes any sense. Shen Qiao is annoyed at him, he’s furious at him, he’s so fucking pissed he could kill that man, but he likes him. He likes Yan Wushi’s company. He likes that Yan Wushi gives him a challenge. He’s exasperated, but he likes it.

Shen Qiao forgives Yan Wushi SO MANY TIMES. Yan Wushi humiliates him and mocks him and is the absolute worst, but Shen Qiao forgives him and more than that, Shen Qiao always is waiting for Yan Wushi to come back to bother him more.

Is there more to Shen Qiao’s attraction? Probably. Is it a daddy kink? It could be. But I honestly can’t help but read it as Shen Qiao falling for the absolute pits of a man that is Yan Wushi. Shen Qiao likes that old bastard and decides to spend the rest of his life with the fucker and he is just too much of a block of ice to show it.

[pablitogavii]

Wsg!!!!

I was wondering if u can do another of Gavi being Obsessed w Readers boobs but make it more spicy?

Hormones

You were on your "girl days" feeling very sore and annoyed with every little thing. Pablo could quickly notice whenever you were on "these days" because you would become extra clingy begging him to baby you more so than usual.

Gavi didn't mind, he loved when you got needy, and secretly felt useful only when he could help you during your girl days. Other times, you were the most efficient and organized person he knows.

"Where is mi niña preciosa??? I'm home, amor!" Pablo came in with a bouquet of red roses interrupting your reading but you smield wide when you saw his little present.

"Are these for me, cariño???" you asked all excited as he kneeled in fornt of you placing the flowers into your lap.

"Are there any other princesas in this household???" he asked and you giggled shaking your head as he smirked proudly kissing your forehead and then your lips. That's when his eyes stole a glance of your cleavage...and dear God were they looking swollen and big!!!

Gavi felt stupid for letting his hormones control him but he couldn't stop staring at them while licking his hungry lips. It was no secret he was quite fond of your breasts, but right now it was more than liking them...he was craving them badly!!!

"Amor? Why are they so big??" Pablo asked and you looked down blushing shyly knowing that they often get like that when you were on your period due to hormones. You rarely wore tank tops during that time so Pablo never really noticed until now...and he was definitely liking it a lot!!!

"Please tell me you didn't do anything to my girls!? I like them natural and perfect!!" he said and you laughed shaking your head and secretly screaming that he liked you just the way you were...natural.

"Your girls are bigger because of my hormones right now, bebé...they swell and ache a little" you explain not expecting Pablo to snake his hand underneath your shirt and touch them ever so gently.

"Do they hurt you right now princesa???" he asks seeing you sigh in relaxation as he carefully massaged them being careful not to be rough with you right now. (there will be other times for that ;))

"Mhm..." you moaned because truth be told you also get very horny during your periods wanting all of Pablo's attention all the god damn time!!!

"Does this help, hm bebé?" he said now lifting your shirt more, moving the flowers to the side and bringing his lips to your perky nipple starting to suck on it.

"Oh P..Pablo..y..yes..p..please don't stop!!!" you moan feeling all the tension in your heavy breast being released as his skilled tongue wrapped around your nipple and his veiny hand massage around the sore areasss.

He quickly scooped you in his arms and carried you to the bedroom. After laying you down he took off your top completely as well as his own laying on top of you and continuing to suck diligently.

You were laying there completely relaxed noticing the bulge in Pablo's pants as he tried to readjust it with his hand while still giving you all the pleasure you craved.

"Um..I..I'm sorry..we can't do it a..amor.." you said in a shaking voice feeling bad that Pablo is left unsatisfied right now thinking of the ways to pay him back when the girls days end.

"Shhh..don't worry about me guapa...just relax and let me ease up the pain so you can nap" he spoke not caring about himself but getting enough pleasure knowing he was helping you right now.

"Mmmm t..they feel so good now" you said as all the soreness vanished and Pablo kissed up your neck to your lips nuzzling his face into your neck while one of his hands still held your exposed breast.

"Nap princesa...your man in right here" he whispered and you finally closed your eyes smiling wide and enjoying the way Pablo's hand felt holding your breast as his body molded into yours.

Short but spicy ;)))

[wsdanon]

hi everyone \o/ I’m not even two episodes into ordem paranormal sdol, but I’ve been thinking a lot about aroace Guizo... so please take a messy little fic exploring that idea \o/!!

(and since I’m not even two episodes into sdol: please don’t spoil anything, and please forgive if I don’t have the voices down very well yet…)

cw for: references to homophobia, two queer people who don’t know they’re queer calling queerness/their own experiences “weird” in a neutral way

reblogs appreciated \o/!!

Guizo’s filming b-roll when Xande starts talking. Which is fine—he usually edits the audio out of b-roll, anyway, and Xande’s always happy enough to sit silently and listen to music if he does want the sound. 

What he says is not fine, though. 

“I could help you get a girlfriend, man.” Xande offers. “Like… if you wanted, you know? I could hype you up.”

Guizo sighs, and pretends he’s focusing too hard on getting the right camera angle to respond. He does not want to be having this conversation. 

“Just ‘cus everyone’s been teasing you about the kiss, yeah?” Xande continues. “I think your next kiss should be with someone you like, is all.” 

“You should let me kiss you then.” 

He didn’t particularly mean to say it—only realising after the words had already spilled from his mouth what it implies. And a quick glance away from the camera to see Xande’s wide eyes staring at him confirms that he’s taken it that way, too.

“What?” He continues defensively. “We’re friends, I like you.” 

“Oh.” Xande nods absently, eyes crinkling in a smile. “I meant like like.” 

Guizo gives up on filming. 

“I know.” He shrugs. “But why does it matter? It’s more likely that I’m going to transform into someone’s husband—or wife!—again before I get a girlfriend.”

“I could help you get a girlfriend.” Xande offers again. 

Guizo bites his tongue, refusing to let stupid words escape this time. He continues like he didn’t hear him. 

“But we’re friends, and I like you, so…” another shrug. “You can keep the mask on if you want.”

Xande’s hand comes up to touch his mask—almost like Guizo’s caught him so off-guard he forgot he was wearing it. Then he tugs it down, revealing red cheeks. 

“No, it’s… fine.”

Huh. Guizo wasn’t expecting him to actually say yes. 

“Are you sure?”

“Yeah…” he points at Guizo warningly, “but you can’t tell anyone, okay?” 

“Okay.”

He looks down at the camera in his hands. Then looks around for a place to prop it up.

“Woah, woah, what are you doing?” Xande asks—usually calm voice taking on a hint of panic. 

“Well the other one was filmed, right? I just wanted the good one saved as well.”

“Guizo, my angel, it’s not exactly normal for two guys to kiss, you know?” 

Guizo frowns, not taking the camera away, but not fully putting it down, either. Discomfort twinges in his chest at the reminder. But Xande is right. 

“I won’t film it then.” 

Not filming things goes against his very nature. He tries to say it without it sounding like he’s in pain, and he’s pretty sure he fails when Xande’s hand lands on his before he can move the camera. 

“No, no, you can.” His eyes are fixated on the camera, carefully avoiding Guizo’s. “Just… remember that, okay? Keep it hidden.”

“You’re sure?”

“Yeah.” And now he looks at Guizo, a small smile on his face. “I want it to be a good memory, you know? You should get to keep it.”

“Thank you.” 

If Guizo’s cheeks weren’t red before, they definitely are now. His face feels like it’s on fire. 

But he leaves the camera where it is, and moves back so they’ll be in frame. Xande comes with him, more relaxed than he was when the conversation first turned in this direction. 

Either he’s putting it on to make Guizo feel better, or he’s genuinely thought it through and decided he doesn’t care. At this point, Guizo doesn’t think he should press. He trusts Xande to tell him if doesn’t want to do something. 

Now he just has to figure out… how to do this. 

“Um…” 

He cups Xande’s cheeks, trying to keep him in place so he doesn’t do something stupid like miss. Xande doesn’t protest at the gesture. So, Guizo closes his eyes and leans in. 

It’s more of a press of lips against lips than anything. Which is maybe just what kissing is if you want a middle ground between a peck and using tongue. 

Xande’s hand cups the back of his neck, fingers curling into the short hair there. Then he tilts his head a little, and things feel… mostly the same, but a little less clumsy. 

Guizo’s entire body feels like it’s on fire now. And there’s a nervousness trembling throughout it. 

But apart from that, it’s… nice? 

It’s nice because it’s Xande. He doesn’t really see what the big deal is. 

He pulls away. 

“I don’t know how to do the whole…” he waves his hand around, “tongue thing.”

“Me neither.” Xande says quietly instead of teasing him for his lack of experience. 

“Are you okay?”

“Yeah, yeah, I’m fine.” Xande pulls his mask up and moves away from him, eyes darting to the camera. Guizo goes to turn it off. “Was it nice?”

Maybe Guizo doesn’t get what all the fuss is about because he’s just bad at kissing. 

“It was better than every other kiss I’ve had so far.”

“C’mon, man.” Xande rolls his eyes, but he’s smiling. “That’s not a high bar to clear.” 

Guizo bites back a comment about how he can’t really see himself bothering to kiss anyone else unless it’s Xande. That would definitely be taken the wrong way. 

“I liked it.” He settles on instead. “Thanks again, man. Did you?”

“Ah, Gui,” Xande ducks his head, shy, “I did. But between you and me it was my first kiss, you know? I don’t have much to compare it to.”

Guizo almost drops his camera. 

“Xande!” He exclaims, voice pitching up with his distress. “Why would you—why would you say yes? It should’ve been with someone special!” 

Guizo doesn’t particularly feel strongly about that. But—especially after the teasing from his friends recently—he knows other people do. 

“You are special, Guizo.” Then he pauses, the words seeming to register. “Not in a gay way though, you know? But you’re my best friend.”

Guizo laughs, and claps his shoulder. 

“Yeah, I know what you mean. You’re special to me, too.”

“And the girlfriend thing is still on the table, by the way.” Xande says. 

He knows it’s just Xande being nice. But it still makes discomfort prickle through him. 

And, well, if Xande isn’t going to drop it…

“I don’t want a girlfriend.” He tries to say it as casually as he can. Like it’s no big deal.

“Ah, okay.” Xande nods to himself. Like Guizo has just confirmed a suspicion of his. “So you are gay.“

“No! I don’t want a boyfriend, either! I think.”

“You think?”

Guizo messes with the camera settings, trying to relieve restless, agitated energy. 

“I’m happy with what I have, you know?” He says, trying to sound as certain as possible. Because he is certain. “I’m happy with filming, and messing around with occult stuff and aliens, and being with The Five. I’m happy with you being my best friend. I don’t need anything else.”

“Oh. Okay, I get it.” Xande looks a little chastised. “I’m sorry, Guizo, I just—“

“No, no, it’s fine.” Guizo sits down as a substitute for lying down in despair. “I know it’s weird. You’re taking it really well, honestly.”

Before this, Guizo was never really worried that any of his friends would assume he’s gay just because he’s not looking for a girlfriend. Was never worried that they might treat him differently because of it. 

But Xande drawing that conclusion and not calling him a slur and running for the hills is good news, at least. Not that Guizo would think he’d do that, but you never know with people sometimes. And it is nice to know even if it’s not actually relevant to him. 

“It’s not that weird…” Xande protests. 

He flicks all his camera settings back to normal. He could probably film some ground shots to add some tension. Low angles, make the viewer feel small—all that. 

“It’s not even normal weird like being gay.” Guizo counters, tilting the camera up and panning it to the side. “It’s just weird.”

Finally, Xande sits down next to him, and nudges Guizo’s shoulder with his. 

“Okay, it’s a little weird.” He agrees. “But we like weird, you know?”

“I mean, I’m not bothered by it.” Guizo doesn’t stop recording, but he does stop focusing on filming. He leans against Xande. “But I’m glad you’re not, either.” 

“Of course I’m not!” Xande throws an arm around his shoulder. “And, Guizo, I’m serious—if anyone starts giving you shit about it, you just give me the signal and I’ll step in, okay?”

“Thank you.” Guizo says with a laugh. “What should the signal be?”

“Man…” Xande hums, thinking. “You make eye contact with me?”

Guizo bats at him. 

“What if I do it accidentally?” 

“Ah, true…” Another pause as he thinks. “Make eye contact with me and say my name.”

“No, no, that won’t work, either.” He bats at Xande again. “What if they ask me who I have a crush on, you know? I can’t just respond by looking at you and saying your name!”

“Also true…” Xande nods absently. Another pause. “Maybe we think of something later, okay, Gui? I’m kind of hungry.” 

“Yeah, okay.” 

Guizo stands up, and offers a hand to Xande. 

This went… better than he expected. Not that he particularly expected it to go a certain way until they started talking and dread filled him. 

Honestly, if it wasn’t for all the teasing after the kiss he probably wouldn’t have even known anything was weird with him until, like… at least another few years. Maybe if the others started dating, or getting married. 

Now, though? Now that it’s been brought up, it’s hard to ignore. His lack of desire—the elephant in the room. 

But at least he has Xande. 

—��

messy little thing… you can probably tell I was trying very hard not to place them in a location pfft

but I hope you enjoyed \o/!!

[prismatoxic]

cause I need to hear more of your sweet thoughts bout those two freaks, favorite laichil moments that have been stewing in the back of the mind?

oh gosh ummmmm

well now that episode 11 is out i am so very deeply fond of laios's visual pan from kensuke to chilchuck's dawning, rage-filled horror at what's happened

i think the swearing was better in the manga--not because the anime let him say actual words (bc i think that's awesome) but bc in the manga i thought they were still running while chilchuck was doing this. good visual

OF COURSE THE BEST EPISODE 11 CHILAIOS MOMENT... TO ME... is when chilchuck tells laios they're going to have a Talk later

the dub delivery kind of disappointed me (as it always does) BUT IN THE SUB the way laios immediately agrees is so very much, to me, a "yes sir" moment. and if you read my fic you know i'm very into this

i have a lot of little canon moments that i'm super fond of and am very excited to see in the anime... my faves are often when chilchuck is being a hostile little goblin but i'm so fucking excited about what i assume will be episode 13. you know. because

um

okay i have a lot of thoughts actually (MANGA SPOILERS I'M SERIOUS)

so. chapter 30.

chilchuck goes to get the party's supplies from where they were abandoned in the house they had dinner with falin at, having his own character arc along the way. we have seen him try to convince both leed and senshi that the smartest thing to do will be to lie to laios and marcille so they can return to the surface. trying to continue in this state will kill them, but neither of them will rest if they think they can still find falin. neither senshi nor leed agree with chilchuck's plan, and leed insinuates he's a coward. chilchuck stays firm. even after he's clearly pushed off kilter by leed saying he should just tell the truth, we don't have any concrete reason to think he will.

then they return and senshi is struggling to keep a now-awake laios down. laios is wounded and weak and senshi is a dwarf but laios is so deeply, fervently determined to get falin back that he's very hard to stop.

chilchuck, by contrast, is not strong at all, but somehow his added presence gets laios to sit back down. chilchuck rests a hand on laios's shoulder and even before he says anything, laios is looking at him. he knows something is coming. i think he resents chilchuck for it, too--the implication that there's anything to be said here.

we don't know at this point what chilchuck intends to say. senshi still thinks he wants to lie and intends to stop him, but i think it's clear in this moment that chilchuck has changed his mind.

he kneels--proud, all-too-aware of "how his people are treated for their size" chilchuck kneels between laios's legs. and i'm not pointing this out for horny reasons, for once.

he's bringing himself closer to laios--assuming a position associated with pleading and willingly making himself not the authority in this interaction. he believes, wholeheartedly, in what he wants to do and what needs to be said, but...

he also knows laios is hurting.

laios is... devastated. he's terrified. he's angry. but he's also still laios, and he knows chilchuck, insofar as chilchuck has allowed him to. he also respects chilchuck. so this--a teary-eyed plea to do what goes against everything he feels--gives him pause. chilchuck does not beg, and he does not cry.

...and he never talks about how he feels.

but he does, here: he doesn't want to lose his friends. and he does mean all of them, senshi included. he has three people to think of--three people whose lives he cannot in good conscience allow to be put at risk any more than they already have been. even so, he acknowledges that however laios feels about falin is probably incomparable.

but he tries to give laios hope--he gives him a plan of action. he says we will come back. he tries to impress upon laios that this isn't defeat and it isn't surrender, it's being safe. it's giving themselves an actual fighting chance at getting falin back.

laios doesn't want to... but he also doesn't say that. all the things he's feeling haven't gone away, but he's also aware of just how big this situation is if chilchuck opened himself up this way. chilchuck does not and never has done this. up until the fight with the red dragon, you could be forgiven for assuming chilchuck is just a contracted coworker who's a little fond of the party and nothing more.

senshi and leed, the only people who knew chilchuck's plan to lie to the others, don't openly acknowledge his change of heart... but they back him up. they pitch in to push laios just a little further, to get him to agree.

and it works.

so. um. episode 13 will be good i think

[evdarlin]

School Kid Crush

*A/N okay so this is the first thing I've wrote since I was like 18 writing about one direction so I'm sorry if its complete dog shit. I tried and kinda want to make it a series maybe if people actually like it but yeah be easy on me pls*

From the moment that I met Spencer Agnew on my very first day at Smosh as the new Games PA, we instantly clicked. We would spend every lunch together quoting obscure movies or Family Guy. We hung out at each other’s apartments many weekends, me just watching him play video games or forcing him to watch Bridgerton with me. There was something there and I think we all could feel it. Spencer was always the one I could go to geek out about the things I always thought I was being annoying talking about. It was almost like I had met my other half which could only be explained as the most terrifying but best feeling in the world. The whole office knew that there was something there but I might be speaking for myself but I did not want to act on it solely from my own relationship problems and that we were coworkers and did not want to make things so complicated. So for now, we are just good good friends who might just be completely infatuated with each other.

Walking into the Smosh office on Friday morning felt like every other morning on the last day of the week. I didn’t get enough sleep and would rather have been curled up back in my bed asleep but someone has to pay rent. Once I arrived at my desk directly across from Courtney’s, I could see that some sweet angel had placed my dear alani drink right in front of my computer. There was only one person who could have brought that for me and I knew it was Spencer so I took off to the Games pod to thank him dearly. 

“Have I ever told you that you are a godsend and have saved my life on multiple occasions?” I say while walking up to Spencer’s desk.

“Well yes but have I ever told you that you are severely overdramatic with your words?” He said as he swiveled around in his chair.

“Alright that’s rude but I’ll let it slide since you brought me a drink sir.” I rolled my eyes and took a seat on the little couch in the small space. The office was pretty quiet this morning which is unusual but I welcomed it. “How long do you think it’s going to take before someone is yelling in here?”

“I say give it about ten minutes when Angela comes in and sees that she has to take care of that baby today” Spencer laughed and almost on cue heard Chanse cackling at Angela.

“Are you going to Courtney and Shayne’s combined bachelor party tonight?” Spencer suddenly looked nervous asking this question which is new for him around me that is.

“Yeah, I was going to head home after work to change then head over to the place, are you going?” I asked, praying and hoping he was going not wanting to miss a chance to hang out with him outside of these four walls of the Smosh office. 

“Well seeing as you just said you were going then absolutely I am. Um, can I pick you up and drive you to the party maybe?” There it was again, the nervous look on his face. 

“Of course!” I said maybe a little too fast and too enthusiastic, “I mean yeah that would be okay, that way I could have at least one or two drinks while I’m there.” I did not recover from that at all but maybe he won’t notice but seeing that smirk on his face, I am wrong.

“Then I will be there to pick you up at 7:30ish, does that sound okay?” Spencer asked, seeming to be a lot more relaxed now that I said yes.

“Sure! That gives me plenty of time, see you later Spen!” I gave him a small wave and walked back to my desk to get started on my small list of tasks I mentally gave myself to get done before filming started and I had zero free time until 5 p.m. As I walked back to my desk I was brought back to how nervous Spencer was asking me if he could drive me to the party. I mean we carpool sometimes to work and even ride together to function outside of the workplace so this shouldn’t be any different right? Oh god, is this a date? Does he know it’s a date? It can’t be a date when it’s Courtney and Shayne’s day right? I’m spiraling and don’t even notice that I ran right into Tommy.

“Oh my god, I’m so sorry I wasn’t paying attention at all!” I stopped to make sure I didn’t cause some huge mess by running into him.

“It’s okay Y/N! You were really deep into thought there love, you doing okay?” Tommy asked with concern written all over his face, I suppose you can tell I was going through it up in my head.

“Uh well not really but I’ll be okay.” We both started walking towards our desks, I hoped to change the subject so I no longer had to think about what’s going on inside my head but Tommy had other ideas.

“Is it Spencer? I can totally fight him if you need me to or I can hide his Kickstarters until he apologizes to you.” Tommy giggled but stopped as soon as he saw how deep red my face had become.

“Wha- How did you know?” You mean to tell me the rest of the office knew how I truly felt about Spencer, shit.

“Oh honey, the man is completely infatuated with you and I also know you’re infatuated with him. I truly thought you guys were already together and just keeping it a secret for personal reasons. You know it’s okay to like him right? I know about the whole relationship problems you’ve had in the past but I don’t think Spencer is like that actually I know he’s not.” Tommy stopped walking to put his hand on my shoulder and gave it a little squeeze.

“Nope, nope, nope. You’re wrong, I know of no such infatuation you speak of Tommy Bowe.” I avoided eye contact the entire time but eventually sighed, “Is it that obvious?”

“Eh, kind of but hey it’s okay to like someone even if you guys work together. You guys have been attached at the hip ever since you started here and I think you might be the same person. I do not think he’s going to ghost you like every other piece of shit man who has entered your life.” Tommy knew more than maybe anyone about how much self doubt I have put on myself from constantly just men stopping talking to me out of nowhere. It didn’t matter if he said he was different, none of them were. They all were the same.

“I know he is a good person Tommy but I’m not sure I could deal with losing him as a friend and even worse I would have to see him every single day at work. I promise I’m just in my head a little bit, I’ll be okay.” I gave my most convincing smile and headed to my computer to start on my work for the day.

The work day honestly flew by without any more emotional spirals even at lunch when I could see Tommy giving me those knowing looks from across the table anytime Spencer did anything remotely nice for me. I left the office the minute it hit 5 p.m. just wanting to get out of there, I didn’t even wait for Spencer to walk with him in the parking lot. I needed to get to the comfort of my apartment and be alone before I had a full blown panic attack, not to mention I needed to get ready for this party. I made it home in record time with just enough time to get ready and sit in silence and think about what I should do. I decided to say screw it and just bring up my conversation with Tommy and see what happens. Do I know what’s going to happen? Not at all but you know what I need to do something to stop this spiral. I grabbed my bag and headed out the door was I saw that Spencer said he was outside. Spencer was waiting outside his car for me and even opened the door for me, what a gentleman. 

“You were nowhere to be found after work dude, where the hell did you go?” Spencer asked, closing the door as I settled into the front seat.

“Sorry, I started feeling bad so I had to get out of there. Hope you didn’t get attacked in the parking lot without your guard dog.” I laughed as he started his car and headed towards the place where the party was being held.

“You are literally shorter than me which is saying a lot but I was a damsel in distress and you just left me alone to die.” Spencer pretended to wipe a fake tear and looked over at me giggling. “But were you okay? Like nothing happened right?”

“Yeah I was fine, Tommy just got me thinking and I just got a little overwhelmed but promise I am perfectly fine now!” I smiled and let out a breath I didn’t even know I was holding in. “It um actually was about you if I’m being honest?” 

“Me? I swear whatever it was I didn’t do it.” Spencer threw his hands up but I grabbed the wheel and gave him a glare.

“He did say that if you hurt my feelings he was going to hide your drinks until you apologize to me,” I looked over at him preparing myself for what I was going to say next, “He also said he thought we were together and were pulling a Courtney and Shayne”. 

“Hm, Tommy thinks we’re famous enough to hide our relationship like that? Wow, I am flattered.” Spencer laughed looking over at me then stopped because he realized this might be a serious conversation. “Wait, being in a relationship with me sounds so terrifying to you that you had to book it out of the office?” I looked over and saw that we had already arrived at the place but I knew our conversation was not going to end just because we were here.

“No! I just got in my head and was so scared that if you knew that I had this massive ass school kid crush on you, it would ruin this friendship we have built. I have no clue what I would do if you were not in my life, Spencer, honestly.” I realized I have just told him about this crush I have on him with my word vomit so there was no turning back now. “I like you alright, I like you a lot and it’s so damn scary because I’m terrified to lose you in any sense of my life.”

“A massive crush you say?” Spencer started giggling and all I could do was glare at him ready to smack that smirk off his face. “I like you too dummy, I thought you knew already and just saw me as your dorky coworker who also is your best friend. I promise you’re not losing me anytime soon. You’re stuck with me now babe.” He smiled and leaned over to give me a soft kiss. A kiss that I think I have been waiting for what felt like years, a kiss that seemed to let go over all of my insecurities and finally felt safe and confident in a relationship. “Now, let’s go into this party and steal Courtney and Shayne’s thunder.”

We started to walk to the door of the place, hand in hand, and ready to face all of our coworkers. The only thing you can hear as soon as we walked into the room was a far away “FUCK YEAH” which I can only place as Angela screaming.

[storydays]

Dad Beat Dad P2

(3rd POV)

*With the tour*

"So, once we have proof that redemption is possible, this whole hotel will be full of demons wanting to check out into Heaven. We just need a little more time to prove it." Charlie rambled to her father, "The sharing circles haven't been working as fast as I hoped..." 

" 'Ey, Boss? Can I have a word?" Husk whispered to Alastor. The Radio Demon watched as the tour continued, before turning to the cat demon with a raised eyebrow. "What is it?" He asked, turning the radio effect off on his voice. 

"You and I both know Mimzy only shows up when she needs somethin'." Husk's wings ruffled slightly showing his irritation. "That bitch is trouble, and who knows what kinda demon she fucked with to come running to you this time?"

"It's nothing I can't handle. Don't worry, Husker. Who in their right mind would cross me?" Alastor said smugly. "I mean...you've been gone a while and it's not like anybody knows why." Husk raised an eyebrow.  "They don't need to know. And don't worry your fuzzy little head about it." mocked Alastor as he rubbed one of Husk's ears. 

The cat demon shoved his hand away, and growled, "You may own my soul, but I ain't your fucking pet!"  "Hmhm! But you are! Haha!" Alastor giggled, walking away. 

"Big talk for someone who's also on a leash/" muttered the bartender.  Static filled the hallway as the lights flickered, Alastor stopping in his walk before side eyeing Husk. "Aha, what did you say?" he demanded, eyes now radio dials. 

"Oh, fuck!" groaned Husk as a green chain formed around his neck before pulling him to the ground. "Nothing, I um--" Alastor pulled on the chain, making the cat choke. "If you ever say that again," the deer started, playing with the chain in his hands, "I will tear your soul apart and broadcast your screams," He briefly grew to a bigger size, towering over Husk, "For every other disrespectful wretch who dares to question me."

"Understood." Husk muttered, trembling in fear. "Lovely. Good talk, my good man. Always nice to catch up." Alastor chuckled, jaunty music playing. 

*Back with the tour again*

"And we've almost been able to find all of Angel's drug stashes." Vaggie looked to the side as she added, "Almost." The three had now made their way to one of the balconies, to talk more privately. Vaggie leaned against the railing as Charlie took over. 

"Soo, once that's out of the way, it should be much smoother sailing." Charlie chimed in. "Well, that certainly is, uh...is-is something." Lucifer commented. 

"So..What do you think?" the princess asked hopefully. "About what?" The king asked lazily.

"The hotel." Charlie replied, slightly desperate. 

"Oh yes, it does....it does look much better now, doesn't it?" Lucifer sweatdropped nervously, looking for an excuse, before messing with the railing in front of him. "Ya know, but I'm thinking this railing needs work, one good push and you'd just go right over the edge. Whoopie, bye-bye." 

Charlie blinked at her father's weirdness. "What? No, no, the plan, Dad!" 

The princess was so frustrated, she didn't seen the forlorn look on her father's face. "What do you think about using the hotel to help sinners?" she asked. 

"Ahh..." he sighed before turning to look Charlie in the face. "Alright, I mean, look, I love that you want to see the best in people, but these sinners..." He made a face, "You know, they're just the worst. I-I don't know how much you can realistically expect from them in Heaven. Hohoo boy, Heaven is not exactly carefree as you might think." The king draped himself over the railing at the thought of his old home, before standing straight. 

"Yeah, they have rules. Lots of rules. And they aren't very open minded as you'd hope." 

Vaggie looked away, as Charlie tried again, "These are our people, Dad. I...I have to try." 

" 'Our people, Charlie, are awful! They got gifted free will and look what they did with it! Everything's terrible." exclaimed Lucifer, gesturing towards the city. "I just don't want you to put yourself on the line for people like---"

A loud thud shook the hotel, making the three grip onto the railings.  "Geez! What now?" Vaggie groaned. "Well, like that." Lucifer gestured to the shark demon gang outside the hotel, holding a battering ram.

"Mimzy! We know you're in there you lousy bitch." 

*In the main foyer*

"Oh shit." whimpered Mimzy, ignoring the looks (Y/N) and Angel sent her. Lucifer opened a portal, allowing him and the women to run down quickly. 

"Que carajo?!" cursed Vaggie, the royals running out of the portal after her. "What's going on?" Charlie questioned.

"I maaaaaaay be in trouble with some loan shark's, I may or may not have borrowed fifty grand from--eep!" The flapped squeaked and hid behind the bar, before peeking out and flinching at the looks she was getting. "You better come out!" called one of the sharks. 

"And I may have also stolen a car..and crashed it...into the loan shark's girlfriend. But that bitch had it coming!" She growled, just as fireballs were thrown into the hotel breaking the windows, much to Niffty's horror. 

"My windows!" she shrieked.  "Ah! We're under seige! Ah! Take cover!" cried Pentious. "Look out!" Vaggie cried, dodging another. "What the fuck?!" Angel yelled, picking Niffty up from being hit. 

(Y/N) growled and used his wings fly up to the windows before using his magic to close the them before grunting when a spear was thrown at him, slicing his cheek. "Fuck!" He hissed before flying outside, hands glowing with magic. "That was a lucky shot, bitch! Now I'm going to fuck you up!" He laughed manically.

Charlie looked at her father as he smirked, "Ya see, this is exaaaactly what I'm talking about Charlie. You build something nice, you invite people in and offer them everything, and they just bring violence and chaos to your doorstep. It doesn't matter how well intentioned  you are, they're always going to disappoint you." 

Niffty giggled as she scooped up glass before being picked up by Pentious, "Niffty, come along!" "All of you, get a safe distance!" Vaggie called, angelic spear in her hand.  "I'll take care of this." she raised her spear, ready to join the manically laughing prince. 

"No, my dear, leave it to me. It's time I remind everyone why I am here." Alastor grinned, radio dials for eyes and a dangerous tone in his voice. 

"Oh, finally! Took ya long enought!" Mimzy snapped from behind the bar. "A reminder to all," Alastor called, the hotel glowing green, as tentacles came out from his back. "Not to mess with the Radio Demon!" his evil laugh echoed in the air as he climbed out of the hotel in his demon form.

His tentacles started to kill the shark demons, making (Y/N) grin. "Yes! Let's fuck shit up, Alastor!" He cackled, drawing his angelic sword before flying down to continue his attack. "I will devour each and every one of you!" Alastor exclaimed, gladly catching and eating a demon that the prince had thrown his way. 

*Back with Charlie*

"Mhm, ya see?" Lucifer hummed, wincing at his son's sadistic side. "What I tell ya? Charlie, sinners are violent psychopaths, hell bent on causing as much pain and destruction as they can. There's really no point in trying." he chuckled before the princess snapped. 

"Dad, stop! They're defending this hotel! It may be a little more.....sadistic than I'd hope." Charlie cringed at the two demon's actions. "But they're doing it for me! How come they can have faith in me, but my own father can't?" She sobbed, making Lucifer look down. 

"Ooh, drama." Angel grinned, taking some popcorn from behind the table, Husk taking some as well.

*Outside*

"Oh, I missed getting to let off steam." Alastor shrunk to his normal size, smiling as (Y/N) landed next to him, putting his sword away, and snapped his fingers and he was all cleaned up,and the cut on his cheek as now healed. "Huh, we'll have to team up more often, Alastor." "Indeed, prince (Y/N)."

(Y/N)'s smile dropped as Mimzy came out. "Oh Alastor! Princey! What a fantastic show! Bravo!" Mimzy clapped her hands, posing. "Thanks for helpin' lil' old me outta a tough spit, you're always such a pal." She flinched as rumble fell nearby. 

"Oops." She shrugged, as (Y/N) crossed his arms, glare on his face. "Heheheh, sorry about the mess. But I'm sure the lil' bug can take care of it for ya." "I think you should go Mimzy. Now." Alastor demanded. 

"Oh, pfft, Alastor, you're such a kidder you! Haha, you are so funny. " laughed the flapper demoness.

"I mean it. You deliberately brought danger to this place just to have me clean up your mess." The deer glared at Mimzy, "I can't have that here."

"But you love takin' care a' me! What? You don't actually give a shit about this tacky place, do ya? Come on. I know you. You heartless son of a bitch." Mimzy giggled, poking Alastor's chest. 

"Okay, I had enough." (Y/N) interrupted, hands on his hips, "You can stay here if you want to actually try and redeem yourself, but we can all see that's not you aren't willing to change your ways, so get out of here." The prince stood at his full height, glaring down at the demoness. 

Mimzy looked curiously at Alastor, waiting for him to deny what the prince was saying. 

Alastor merely blinked. "Fine! Who needs ya? Have fun with ya lil' royals and ya lil' hotel. See if I care." Mimzy flicked the men off before leaving. 

"Ugh, finally. Thought that bitch would never leave." (Y/N) rolled his eyes before turning to walk over to the damaged hotel entrance, watching his father and sister with a thoughtful look. 

"This is getting really good." Angel smirked, as he and Husk continued to smack on popcorn, Pentious rolling his eyes at the two.

"Dad..just..help me." pleaded Charlie. 

"I...I can't." the king replied, facing away from her. 

"Why can't you?" pressed the blond princess.

(Y/N) smiled softly from where he and Vaggie were standing near the door as his father and sister finally talked about their feelings.

"Okay," Lucifer relented, "I can get you the meeting, but once you're in Heaven, I won't be able to go with you. Will you be okay?" He asked, looking into Charlie's eyes, waiting for her to answer. "I'll be fine." She promised. 

"That's my girl."

Lucifer held a hand out for (Y/N) to come and join them. The prince took his hand and smiled when the King cupped his son's cheek, looking at Angel briefly before turning to his son's mismatched eyes. 

"Eisai eftychismenos gie mou (Are you happy, son?)"  He asked. "Eimai, bampa. Me kanei...pio dynato. (I am, Dad. He makes me...stronger.) Ton agapo. (I love him.)" (Y/N) replied softly, pushing against his father's hand,just like he did when he was a little boy. Lucifer's eyes widen slightly before he smiled softly, "Kalos. (Good)." 

He took a step back, smiling proudly at his children. "Good luck, kiddos." With that, he teleported away. 

(Y/N) wiped a tear away, smiling up at Angel Dust as he came over and pulled the prince into his side, with a soft smile.

"This next part is going to be scary..." Vaggie sighed, rubbing a hand over her neck as she approached Charlie. "Are you ready?" 

"I am ready." Charlie pulled her girlfriend into a hug. " 'Cause you and (Y/N) will be with me." "In spirit, right?" Vaggie asked, still hugging the princess. 

"In Heaven." confirmed Charlie confidently.  "Yay!" Vaggie replied dryly.

*With (Y/N)*

The prince and the spider were hanging on (Y/N)'s balcony, each sitting in their respective spots, (Y/N) playing with his magic in his hands. 

*Timeskip*

The couple was sitting on top of one of the highest buildings in Pride ring, holding each other as they watched the lights below. "Mia cara...." (Y/N) started, fidgeting slightly with Angel's fingers. Angel hummed in acknowledgment, running a hand through (Y/N)'s hair. 

"We've been together for a while, a-and w-well, I um..uhh..." Angel looked down at the prince questioningly as he stuttered. 

"It's okay, amore. Take ya time." He soothed, (Y/N) sighing softly before reaching into his pocket and pulling out a tiny box.

Angel looked at the box in confusion. "Bambino..." 

"I-I know it's too early to get married, but this love that we share, I haven't felt since Archer," (Y/N) continued to play with the spider's fingers, ignoring Angel's soft gasp at the mention of his last lover. 

"This is a engagement ring, and I will wait for you. And I want to protect you, and keep you smiling because you are such a beautiful soul who deserves everything and I--" Angel pressed a kiss to the rambling prince's lips. "I will happily marry you." He whispered, holding (Y/N) close as their foreheads pressed together. "Whenever you are ready, amore mio." Angel chuckled to himself at the flustered look on (Y/N)'s face, before kissing the blond demon, turning it into a heavy make out session.

"Angel..." moaned (Y/N), gripping onto the spider's shoulders. "Mm, let's go to your room, and let me make those wings flap." Angel giggled.

*End!*

Tbh, I'm not too sure about this chapter, might do a rewrite. Let me know your thoughts!

[guppybibi]

It's Showbiz, Baby.

𖦹 pairing: Kita Shinsuke x fem!reader

𖦹 word count: 2460

𖦹 content: shinsuke is in deep denial, slowburn…very slowburn. hints(?) of body image issues and eating disorders. shinsuke is insanely oblivious. mild cursing.

𖦹 notes: a lot of the farming terms are from google…i i dont know how it works. Also just posted it on my AO3 ! (hearts4abbie). I apologize for any misinformation about the topics here, all of these are from google. next one is them having a silly 'date' tee hee:p

✧. ┊    Part 1 ┊ Part 2

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It was the break of dawn, and Shinsuke was already up and about in the fields; sleep was still in his system. He yawns as he tends to his rice grains, spraying on some fertilizer to increase the yield. Adjusting his hat that keeps him cool while under the sun, he yawns while intently watching the sky as he waits for the sun to rise. To his own surprise, he was met with a light tap on his back which obscurely startled him. His body instinctively does a little jump, yet his face said otherwise as it was still the same as before. Turning around to see who it was, expecting it to be his family. You were standing right before him in humble clothing, one wouldn’t think of you as a viral sensation with how you looked like right now. Shinsuke mentally shook his head, he shouldn’t stereotype that all celebrities prance around in designer clothing..

“Um..Shinsuke, right? Can I ask you something?” You asked in a rather meek tone which Shin didn’t really expect, sure he had already met you yesterday but he couldn’t just automatically assume how a person acted based off of one single interaction. He won’t lie, he has watched multiple of your movies with his sister and you coincidentally played all of the roles that required you to be rude and mean. He just..expected you to act that way in real life as well since you were so good at playing those types of roles. It was like you were meant to be playing the role of an antagonist in every movie you star in, yet the figure in front of him tells him a completely different story. “Yes, what do you need Ms.- um..Y/N.'' He curses himself in his head when he slips up, he had permission from her to address her casually; after all they seemed to be about the same age as each other. “Well I’m sorry for bothering you if I did but I heard there’s a plaza nearby? Do you know the directions to it?” You ask, fiddling with your hair as you anticipate his answer.

“The plaza..? Well I’m not so sure which plaza you’re referring to but the nearest one here is about an hour away..” He replies and gets a disappointed look in return, hearing you mutter an “oh..”. The air of dismay surrounding you struck something in him, he wasn’t sure he knew what it was but he couldn’t stand seeing you feel that way. He assumes it’s just his hospitable nature striking a chord in his system, a lady was in need of help; his client out of all people so he needed to help. “I’m actually stopping by there later this afternoon to drop off some deliveries, maybe you could tag along?” He offers, quickly catching your attention. “I’d love to! Thank you so much, I’ll pay you-""No need to pay me with money, I don’t need it.” He bites his tongue to stop himself from offering her to help her around the farm or cleaning his home, remembering that she was a guest and a celebrity. He shouldn’t let her lift a finger, she was here to relax; not to scrub the floors of their porch. Though you notice he was about to say something, urging him to continue. Humans had the right to speak after all! Unless he was an alien–no that was stupid..You couldn’t help but visualize him as an alien though..”No no! Go on, I’m not that sensitive. I’m sure I can handle whatever you were going to say.” You insist, the white haired man still looking unsure. “I..Maybe you could help with scrubbing the floors..?” He suggests, his voice barely audible as he tries to avoid your gaze. “That’s it?” You question, tilting your head to the side.

Shinsuke looks at you, raising another thin little brow. You spoke of the chore like it wasn’t a laborious task, sure it wasn’t the hardest one but it still required a good amount of effort. “You don’t really need to-” “No! I- I mean, I’ll do it!” Shinsuke knew that he had no place to argue back, whenever he had disagreements with women he always somehow managed to lose. Whether it be with his grandma or sister, it seems like it hasn’t changed until now. “Alright, I’ll take the silence as a yes. When do I start?” You ask, looking oddly excited to do such a chore. Shinsuke thinks about how his whole family is still asleep right now, not to be awake in a few hours or so. It would be best if she started while his sister was asleep so she doesn’t go batshit crazy when she sees her idol scrubbing the floors of her home. “If it’s okay with you, you can start now. When you’re finished, come back to me.” He instructs while you nod in agreement.

“The things you need are in the closet over there, thank you. If you don’t want to do it, you can always stop whenever.” “I’m not made out of glass, I can scrub a few floors here and there! I’ll be back.” Then you set off, Shinsuke could see your figure from afar–on your knees as you cleaned the floors. He can imagine his dear grandma scolding him for making a guest such as her clean their home. Eventually, you finish the task given to you; putting away all the supplies you used and proudly standing before the now squeaky floors. Looking over to the field, you see that Shinsuke was already pretty far. Running over to him, following his instructions earlier; you weren’t so sure if you were panting because you’ve been running too quickly for a while now or if your body is just tired from the task you just did. You always felt tired, you didn’t know why. Everyday you just felt so low on energy, like you were about to collapse and fall asleep. It never really worried you, you weren’t a sickly person–even as a child.

You stop in your tracks once you reach Shinsuke, who is still doing farm work. Hands on your knees and sweat beading on your forehead as you pant, you looked like you ran a marathon. A concerned expression arises on his face, about to reach out to help you before you start waving your hands. “I-I’m alright! I finished scrubbing the floors, they’re squeaky clean!” You babble, hands on your hips as you finally managed to lift your body up. “Um..alright, thank you Y/N. I’m actually about to finish up so we can have breakfast together? It’s 7AM already, unless you’ve already had your fill before coming up to me earlier?” Have you eaten yet? You don’t really remember, it’s not like you keep track of everything you do daily. You shook your head no, feeling your stomach grumble at the idea of food. You blush as you hear your tummy growl, wanting to shame your own belly from loudly announcing your hunger in front of your acquaintance. Shinsuke just smiles though, almost identical to the one his grandma always has. He doesn’t really notice the sounds of your stomach, not that he cares–it wasn’t any of his business. “Very well, come with me. I’ll just reheat some of the rice porridge we had last night, if that’s fine with you?” Rice porridge..It sounded nice, considering that the rice was made by them; a bunch of well trusted rice farmers–it must’ve been good. Yet the next words you blurted out next were quite different from what was on your mind. “How many calories does that have again?” You swore you sounded like a crazy health nut just now, realizing that it may have been interpreted as something rude. “It’s about 80 calories, I don’t see why it matters-” Stopping himself yet again, something felt weird..Shinsuke has never doubted himself, never. So why does he feel like he’s walking on eggshells when he’s around you?

Is it because you’re a literal leading light in the entertainment industry and could quickly trash his whole family’s name with a snap of a finger? No, with how you’ve acted so far; he can safely assume you wouldn’t do that over something so simple. However there really is something churning in the bottom of his stomach, you didn’t seem right to him. “80 calories huh..Well since I’m on vacation, I should treat myself to a good meal!” You mumble to yourself, shrugging as you watch and follow Shinsuke while you both trek back to his family home. You were honestly pretty surprised how welcoming he has been so far, is this how all province folk are? Wondering if his family was the same and that Shinsuke wasn’t an exception. You might as well move right here, this instant! “After you,” The bicolored man spoke, sliding the wooden door open carefully so as to not wake up his still sleeping family. Looking around his home as you step in, awe fills you once you see the traditional interior of the home. It felt strangely comforting, nothing you’ve ever felt even when staying at the grandest mansions back in the city. Everything truly has its own charm..”Make yourself at home, I’ll just heat up the food.” As Shinsuke excuses himself out of the room, while he heats up the food; the feeling in his stomach wouldn’t go away. Perhaps it was just hunger, it must’ve been.

He’s never felt this way in a rather long time, the feeling has a similar tinge to when he was looking after his volleyball team way back. Watching over them like a proud father, feeling obliged to take them under his wing. Or the first time he saw his little brother, light shining on the swaddled baby as Shinsuke thanked the Gods above them. Care. That was what he felt. But why did he care about you? You were a mere client to him, ones he came across with everyday. What exactly made you different? He just couldn’t put a finger on it..He decides that he’ll soon do what he thinks is best, questioning his family about it.

Having breakfast with you felt natural, chatting about your two contrasting lives surely kept you both entertained as you gulped down the meal. The calming aura surrounding you both that felt just right was disturbed when Kimiko entered the kitchen, still in her pajamas with bed hair as she rubs her eyes open. She stood by the doorway, staring at you; recognizing you almost immediately. It took everything in her not to pounce onto you in excitement, she doesn't even know what to do first–is she still dreaming? She pinches herself, hoping she wasn't in a dream.

“Good morning Kimiko.” Shinsuke greets, interrupting Kimiko’s buzz as he drinks some water. Then you figure it was time for you to greet her as well, it’d be awfully rude not to. “Good morni-” “OH MY GOD! I- And you're having breakfast with my brother!?” She even takes a double take to make sure you were really eating together with her brother and he didn't even bother to tell her! She couldn't believe this, it was practically betrayal! “I’m Kimiko, it's so so so nice to meet you- I’m honored-!” She blurts out, taking your hand and shaking it instinctively. She was in such a thrill she didn't even notice she was crossing your boundaries a little bit.

What she did notice is how bony your hands are, a punch from you would definitely hurt..The inner Kita family hospitality and concern arises in her system, looking down at your linked hands. They were veiny but that was normal, but someone of your age and height shouldn't be this skinny. She slowly sets your hand down, apologizing for her actions. “It's alright, no need to apologize. It's a pleasure meeting you Kimiko, your family has been nothing but great since I got here.” You commented, flashing her one of your signature soft smiles that made everyone melt.

“And, thank you Shinsuke for the meal. I’m going back to my cabin, I’ll get ready for the ride later.” You then excuse yourself and leave the two siblings alone, once Kimiko makes sure you're out of the vicinity she gives her brother a knowing smirk. “A ride, huh? Got a date?” Shinsuke shook his head no, he was just doing you a favor after all. “No, she's going to the plaza so I figured it’d be best if we go together.” He gets a disappointed sigh from Kimiko, huffing as her excitement dies down. “Awh..too bad, I thought my brother actually scored a date with a celebrity!” The bicolored man was unfazed, used to her sister's teasing. Shinsuke never really bothered about his love life, putting his work and family as his top priorities. He knew it was important but he had to set goals first.

“Ya know I got eyes on the back of my head, I know you have a thing for Y/N. To be honest, you really aren't the only one so I’m not surprised. I wouldn't mind her being my sister in law!” Her words made the man think, he simply believed that this was just infatuation. She was a beautiful young woman after all, the whole world was aware of that so it really wouldn't be anything extraordinary. He wasn't one to believe in things such as ‘love in first sight’, those were just things entertainment made up. Kimiko knew what her brother was thinking, annoyed at it..or she's just a ‘little’ bit of a hopeless romantic. “I know you're thinking this is just infatuation again, and I’m not pressuring you to start a thing with her or anything–but if you feel something for her then go for it. Take the chance.” Again, this made Shinsuke think. He knew she was right, still–he never really had the heart to go further as ‘friends’ with the people he met. Not that he was uneducated about it, he was honestly just a busy guy. The part of her being a celebrity set him off a little bit though, her life was far from private and quiet. The complete opposite of what he desired, he felt like it wouldn't work out in the long run. “Um..yes, alright. Though I do believe a ‘crush’ of some sort is formed over time thr-” “Yes yes, we get it! No need to do some rocket science explaining, now go prepare the packages. I’ll have breakfast and clean up.” She cuts him off, pushing him out of their humble family home. Shinsuke grumbles under his breath..

“Maybe for once in my life, the results won't be just a byproduct.”

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[grimdarling69]

Leave All Your Longing Behind

Emily had been having a pretty good day until the organized crime unit showed up.

"Spencer Reid? Organized crime Unit, im Agent Dawes, and this is my partner, Agent Dexter."

"Yes?" Spencer asked confused standing up from his desk.

"We'd like to ask you some questions? We believe you might be helpful for a case of ours." Spencer seemed confused and startled. He looked around, confused, searching for help. She's about to question them when Hotch speaks from above them on the platform.

"You need to go through the proper channels to use my subordinate. And I have to approve it which I know I haven't."

Hotch walked down the stairs coming to stop in front of them.

"A child's life is on the line. He has relative information to our case. We don't have time for the proper channels." If that was Dawes' attempt at intimidating Hotch, he was going to he very disappointed.

"How about we take a look at the case as a team. Send it to our liason. Now excuse us. We still have work to do." Dawes seemed upset, but after his partner whispered in his ear, he seemed to come to a decision.

"Fine, I'll send it, but hurry children's lives are on the line. We're running out of time." With that, they turned around and left the bullpen.

"Meeting room 20 minutes. Reid, my office." He motioned for Reid to follow him and turned back around.

----------

"You want to tell me what all that was about?" Hotch asked cocking his head to the side. Spencer was still confused. Kidnapping? Organized crime? He tried to think of any cases he's seen like that would be possibly the Robles case, but the entire team worked on that they wouldn't just question him. He had an eidetic memory he should be able to remember if he knew of any information. He couldn't help but think of...all the quests possibly. When they used the cover of Ares kidnapping them and trying to escape from him to clear their names. Could someone or even Ares himself if he grabbed his children from people who didn't want them to go to camp. Gideon was supposed to be the only one who knew.

"Reid?" Hotch prompted softer this time.

" I don't know... I-"

"Reid, you know something." Hotch commanded him this time. He was profiling him.

"I was taken-when I was younger and he was-never...caught..." he supposed that was the only way to describe. He was technically taken a lot as a child, so it didn't completely count as a lie.

"That's not in your file..." he said quietly like it was only for himself.

"Gideon buried it deeply."

"Of course he did." The look hotch gave him was hard to describe. He tried not to profile it, but anyone could see the regret in his eyes. The hurt from him not telling him maybe. He didn't mean to hurt him or his friends it was just Spencer Reid wasn't a demi-god. He wasn't a war veteran and wasn't a 'daughter' of athena. He didn't have to bend in all those directions for the gods. He doesn't have to run all the time well traveling half way across the country weekly does help.

"Meeting room with the others in need to do some things." Hotch dismissed him and didn't loop up from the papers. He glanced back at him when he was about to leave the room, but his face was more closed off than ever. He didn't even look up.

--------

"Look up his past, Garcia. Reids whole childhood." Hotch told her. Oh, Spencer, what did you get yourself into this time?

"Come on hotch he's standing right there." Morgan defended their friend.

"It's fine. It's important." Spencer spoke, sitting in his chair, not meeting anyone's eyes, only reading the case file. Morgan just stared at him in disbelief. Emily and Rossi were silent sentinels sitting in their chairs.

"Um-born Annabeth Chase...was labeled a runaway at 7 years old then went off grid...oh my god..." She read the screen horrified by all the known things that happened to her best friend. What else had happened that wasn't written in these reports?

"Were you kidnapped, or did you run away?" Rossi interrupted her thoughts.

"Ran."

"Why chase?" Emily questioned. She was wondering the same thing.

"It's my father's last name. Reid is his sisters married name. Diana took me in for my high school years. She's like a mother to me."

"Father Dr. Fredrick Chase reported her missing, his wife, Spencer's step mom, according to this report filed her as a runaway the next day. Police initially labeled her as a suspect because of the reported problems between the couple and, according to their friends, it was over Spencer..." She had read important information she usually told to the team, but it was so different reading about her friends than just suspects or victims on their cases. She always hated looking into her friends' past. It wasn't usually a good sign.

"We didn't get along."

"They removed her from the suspects list because she had an airtight alibi from work on camera." Better to be safe than sorry, and she already checked out the cameras listed in the report.

"What about the mother-i mean reids blood mother?" Morgan was trying to treat it like a regular case, but he takes their teammates' cases sometimes... too personal.

"Unknown, father reported finding him on his doorstep when he submitted an application for her birth certificate." Must have been hell of a wake-up call for him he was still in college at this time. The mother could be anyone from a random party to a rundown college bar. Spencer's mother... God, she thought she knew everything about him, and now this?

"Is this really relevant to the case?" JJ questioned, trying to save atleast some of Spencer's mystery.

"Yes, every single one of the kids that went missing has at least one absentee or unknown parent." Hotch explained, tacking up some pictures from the file. Including one of 'Annabeth Chase' the picture was clearly a school photo. She guessed age 7 he was smiling but it didn't reach his eyes. He was dressed...girly? She knew he was trans heck she had leant him a pad before! It was just strange to see evidence of it? Before he transitioned, she means. He had long blood hair and a giant pink bow on, for gods sake.

"Do we really need that photo?" Spencer spoke softly, sounding defeated he didn't look up and just stared at the empty chair across from him. Hotch took the tac out and turned the photo around.

The door opens, and the agents walk in, looking smug. "Glad to see you changed your mind." Dawes condescends, and Dexter judges and smirks at the board like he was about to start mansplaining how to pin pictures to the board. She could tell he was staring holes into the white back of the turned around photo.

"Looks like one of the photos got turned around. Let me fix that for you." Dexter reaches his hand up to touch it. Hotch grabs his wrist tight enough she can see his knuckles turn white.

"No need." He grunted out, staring in challenge. Dexter winces from the pain and steals his hand back. "Just trying to be friendly." He tries to appear unaffected and light, but the pained grimace and wringing of the hand ruins the illusion.

"I was hoping to start with an interview? We need to know everything that happened that wasn't recorded in the reports." Dawes interjects, leaning forward on the empty chair to subtlety enter Spencer's space.

"Why do you feel like the reports are lacking?" Emily questions arms crossed, and JJ stands at her side, looking down on the man leaning halfway over the table. Without missing a beat, Dawes argues, "Well, most reports just don't have all the little details, you know? Luckily, your boy genius here has one hell of a memory, correct?" If looks could kill Dawes would be road kill. If not from Spencer's glistening grey-eyed glare, then from everybody else glaring swords through him.

"I believe i lost the right to be called boy genius when I gaimed the right to drink, but yes, I do have an eidetic memory." Spencer sassed him, and she could see the tightness grow in Dawe's smile. God, it was beautiful.

Spencer rose from his seat and huffed at the nervous look shared between the agents.

"Let's get this over with." She shared a look with Derek. His eyebrows pulled in concentration, his eyes dewey. He looked as sexy as ever, and this was just another instance she wished she was a profiler. To be able to know them on the level they know her and eachother.

[kenphobia]

HEART STUTTER!

"you're the absolute most."

summary. wally headcanons with a gender-neutral who isn't good at talking, uses vague wording and confuses smiliar sounding words with each other. ( headcanons / rewritten / see end notes)

contents. fluff i think. possibly ooc too. barnaby teasing the heck out of wally. take the L, wallace, take it.

✦ Wally finds it oddly charming, for some inexplicable reason. He tries his best to understand you and somehow he knows what you're trying to say better than you could. He does let you explain for yourself, but once you turn to him with those pitiful eyes of yours, he couldn't help but finish your words for you.

✦ In some way, Wally understands how you feel. He is a charming little puppet but even so, he slurs his speech a lot which at times make him sound drunk and inaudible.

✦ Whenever you misuse and confuse words, Wally will use context clues to figure out what you're saying. To him, it's like a little puzzle game and he enjoys it very much. He does wonder how you can say typos out loud, concerning but he eats with his eyes so he can't complain.

✦ He'll always reassure you that your speech is fine and that you can take your time figuring what to say. You look better smiling than with your brows creased like that, so cheer up!

✦ Out of all of the neighbors, he understands you the most. You could refer to food as "Biting things" and he'll fetch some for you instantly, he makes a few mistakes at times and he apologizes deeply. Wally doesn't like making assumptions, especially if those assumptions makes you upset at yourself.

✦ Wally could pick up your vague wording the more he spends time with you. He wouldn't notice it until Barnaby mention it.

"And so, (Name) and I went to fetch the things from Poppy's place before coming to meet you all here." Wally vaguely gestured to the food laid on the picnic blanket underneath them, his eyes drifting you chatting and helping Julie fly her kite.

The larger puppet nodded his head, smiling almost teasingly. Wally quirked a brow at Barnaby's sudden weird attitude.

"Is there a problem, Barnaby?" Wally questioned.

"Oh no, it's nothing." Barnaby shrugged, taking his tobacco pipe from his mouth and into his large paw. He glanced over to you and Julie before turning back to Wally. "So, you and (Name), huh?"

"... Yes, we are an item, Barnaby. Is there something wrong?"

"Nope! It's just that you're so in love with them that you're already copying them." Barnaby chuckled. He took a breath in and blew out from his pipe.

"I'm—" Wally paused, his brows furrowed. "I don't think I follow what you mean, Barnaby. I do love them, in fact I am madly captivated by them, but I don't think I'd be so inclined to do the same things as they do."

"Oh yeah?" Wally raised a jesting brow. "Then, tell me what you were doing before the picnic." He gestured to the picnic set before the two of them.

"Well, that's easy!" Wally clapped his hands joyfully. "I woke up, finished some evenings, no, paintings! Yes, those things. Then, um, I met up with you all to talk about things and after cat— that! I went with (Name) to get the stuff from Poppy's and— Oh good lord."

Barnaby letted out a roaring of laughter and patted Wally's back. "You see what I mean now?"

Wally nodded silently, dumbfounded by how oblivious he was towards his speech. He was usually self-aware, watchful and cautious about the way he acts yet he managed you fumble over his words. Right in front of his best friend too.

"I guess they got your tongue tied?"

"Barnaby, kindly shut up for once."

author's note. i amr ushing, I am RUSHING!!!! this was requested by @ssvv-cc but i accidentally answered their ask with the wrong contents and i deleted it so um terribly sorry :')) i might upload the last one but for now, let me cry in shame

again, my requests are always open. do note that im not a welcome home writer but i do writer many other things <33 /nm

[matthew-gray-gubler-lover]

a picture-perfect proposal.

Spencer Reid picture-perfect.

Spencer Reid had no idea when he came home from a long case that his new neighbor would be the love of his life. And together they would create the picture-perfect life.

A four-part series.

18+

Fluff. Smut. The Criminal Minds team being the Criminal Minds team. Love story.

This part is going to be a little bit longer and much dirtier than the first part of the story. I'm writing this in a particularly turn on part of my life, and i don't have a man to help me with that so i write. and I hope that I didn't make it too dirty, too raunchy. It does contain a lot of sex. Meeting the team. Spencer and his girlfriend come clean about some things.

masterlist for this story

It's been six months since y/n Met Spencer Reid in her hallway. In that time, they have tried to get used to the fact that he Won't be around very often. It's something that neither one of them enjoys.

In that amount of time, y/n and Spencer have learned to cherish every second that they spend together. So it's not unusual for her to wake up and Spencer's arms on his days off. Still tangled up together after falling asleep after a night of passionate love making. Something that she missed this morning as you woke up and there was no Spencer in your bed despite the fact that it is his day off. It wasn't until you heard the shower running that you realized Spencer had woken up before you and decided to take a shower.

You start to shuffle around in bed a little bit, trying to get more comfortable. But no matter how much you moved, you weren't going to be able to ignore the ache in your center. It's the Ache that only Spencer can relieve. You're not sure why you're missing him so bad after last night, you should be good for a while, but then again, it is Spencer Reid and you can never get enough of him. You hear the shower go off and you can't stop thinking about wet, naked Spencer. Something about that man that does something to you.

Spencer comes out of the bathroom with a towel wrapped around his waist. One of your pretty pink ones. It's a sight to see really. (Yes, this is a nod to him as Chip Taylor in the movie 68 Kill. I couldn't help it.)

"Morning beautiful" you heard Spencer say.

" Good morning handsome" you replied.

" I was hoping to make it back into bed before you woke up. I'm sorry. I know how much you love waking up in my arms, and I know that I sure love having you wake up there. I miss you so much when I'm away baby" he says, coming closer to the bed.

"It's OK. I woke up and saw you weren't there and then started missing you. And was afraid that maybe last night was just a dream. But when I heard the shower running, I remembered that you were here. And then there's the fact that I don't sleep naked unless you're here. So." She said with a chuckle.

"Well, yes, there is that. I don't sleep naked unless I'm with you either". Spencer told her, getting closer to the bed. 

"So how are you feeling This morning, sweetie". Spencer asked.

"well I'm feeling um", she said Shifting slightly in the bed. "Horny" She whined.

"Really. Even though I took such good care of you last night." Spencer asked, getting closer to the bed before removing his towel and showing off his full body to her.  That didn't exactly help her current state. That was until he got closer to the bed and got under the covers with her that she finally started to feel relief once he pushed inside.

"Is this what you needed?" He asked. Is He was beginning to move slowly.

"Yes, this is exactly what I needed. Thank you, Spencer." She said as he began to pick up the pace a little bit more. 

"I would say I don't know how you could need more after the night we had, but I understand it because I need you too. So I was really happy to hear that you wanted me."

He Made sweet, gentle love to her three times that morning. There are both so happy that Spencer didn't have a case. They had the whole weekend all to themselves. Unfortunately though, the Reality of life came when Monday morning came along. Spencer's phone started ringing at 8:00 in the morning as he was making love to her once again. Spencer couldn't hide the disappointment in his voice when he heard JJ on the other end of the phone. saying that he had a case.

JJ Understood his disappointment, but only because she thought that he was happy to have some time off.  Catching up on his reading. Get some much-deserved sleep, maybe have a nice meal, sleeping in a bed that wasn't a hotel bed. She had no idea about his girlfriend. No one on the team does at this point, only Luke Alvez. And he kept his promise to Spencer and didn't tell anyone about. Y/N

"OK, JJ I'll be there soon" Spencer said with a sigh, hanging up the phone. he looked at Y/N And she could see the disappointment in his face. 

"Is it a case?" she asked with a sigh. Tucking. her head into his side. 

"Unfortunately, yes. I'm so sorry".

" Hey, it's OK. I knew the consequences of getting involved with the FBI, man. Doesn't make it any easier for me, but".

" Well, the good news is I'll be able to come back. The case is local, so. I won't have to be gone as long. Might still have to stay in a hotel though if it's Too far away from home and Emily doesn't let me come back home. But she might. And then We can still spend the nights together"

" I would like that. I would like that very much. You know, I do miss you terribly when you're gone. I don't know if you miss me as much as I miss". She was cut off with a kiss to the lips. 

"I miss you like crazy". Spencer told her. "I miss you too".

Spencer made his way into the station. And found out what the case was about. He was pretty much just going through the motions at this point, trying to get back home. As a profiler, he knows to try to keep a straight face, a poker face if you will, which should be easy for Spencer Reid, giving that he is from Las Vegas. Today, however, the lovesick boy took over and he lost his poker face. He was looking at a picture of his girlfriend on his phone when Rossi came up behind him.

"Who's that?" Rossi asked.

"Ohh, she's. Um." Spencer tried to come up with a lie. He tried to come up with it quick.

"Is that a girl?" He could hear JJ saying from behind him.

"um, you know what? I think there's something happening, uh, this paperwork over here?" Luke tried to help Spencer.

"What paperwork?  I didn't think there was any paperwork to be done. We don't file paperwork until after the case is done, Luke, you know that". JJ told him.

"Thank you, Luke. You tried. I appreciate it, I really do", Spencer said. With a sigh, setting down his phone.

"This is.y/n She was my new neighbor and now she's my girlfriend".

"Girlfriend?!". Everyone's shrieked Except for Luke.

"How we're just finding out about this? How long has it been?" Prentiss asked.

 "Six months" 

"six months and it is telling us about her now. We have to meet her. Please, we have to meet her. Is this why you sounded so disappointed when I called you about the case? Oh my God, were you in bed with her? OH, did I call you during sex? ". JJ said.

"Yes, I was in bed with her at the time. I had to leave her to come do this case and I've been missing her like crazy. I didn't mean to hurt anyone by not telling you, it's just personal. And the last time I had a girlfriend it didn't work out because she got killed in front of me and I don't know, I guess I just didn't want to jinx it." Spencer explained.

"We understand, reid. It's OK. Would you be alright with us meeting her though? I am throwing a party next week and I think that it would be nice for her to come, and we could all meet her. But only if you're comfortable with it". Rossi asked.

"I would like that. I would like for everyone to get to meet her. I love her so much. I'll ask her if she'd like to meet you. I'm sure she would."

Spencer came home that night and pitched the idea to her about meeting the team. 

"Something happened today. I was looking at a picture of you on my phone. I got so distracted that I didn't notice Rossi coming up behind me and he saw you. Now the whole team knows about you, and they want to meet you."

She was both excited yet nervous at the same time. Excited because she really wanted to meet the people that were so important to him and in his life all the time.

Finally, the night of the party came after three excruciatingly long days. Spencer was all Hers. again.

She stood in her bedroom looking through her dresses. She only really had two nice dresses to wear for such an event. both of them Kind of like cocktail dresses in a way. One with silver and one with a dark blue velvet like dress.

She walked out into the living room and asked Spencer which one he liked better, holding both of them up on hangers.

Spencer looked at her his mouth dropping as she stood there wearing her black lace bra and panties.

"Spencer?". She asked, moving the dresses up and down. 

"Which one do you like?"

 Spencer got up from this chair that he was sitting in. And walked slowly over to her. 

"Can I be honest with you?" He asked, rubbing his hands up and down her arms. 

"Yes, that's what I need right now". 

"I love what you're wearing right now". he whispered to her his lips so close to her right ear.

"Thank you, Spencer. Unfortunately, I can't go to a party with your coworkers wearing this".

" Well, no, you couldn't really do that. You're right about that, but. You asked me which one I like better. But. Yeah. If I have to go with you actually wearing a dress, I'll say the blue one. Then that way we can match". He said, pointing to the. Blue shirt and pants that he was wearing. The sleeves of his shirt rolled back.

"OH my gosh I didn't even notice when I saw you there. So sexy but didn't really. Notice that what you had on was blue. so We are going to be the cute little matching couple."

"Yes, but only if you want to be. If you want to wear the silver one that's fine, but I personally really love the blue one."

"Then the blue one it shall be".

"I don't know if I'm going to be able to keep my mind off of what you're wearing underneath that dress though." Spencer told her, watching her walk away.

"You can think about it and then you can take it off of me when we get back home tonight". She offered as she walked into the bedroom to finish getting ready.

At this point, Spencer wasn't really sure that he was going to make it to the end of the night. The drive to Rossi's house seemed to pass quickly. It seemed like no time at all before they were pulling up in front of his house, the house that was all full of cars. They were the last ones to get there. 

"Are you ready?" He asked, holding her hand before they got out of the car. 

"I think so, yes. This is a lot of cars, a lot of people. OK, I'm not really Used to crowds". She said Taking a deep breath.

"Don't worry, they're going to love you." Spencer reassured her before giving her a kiss and getting out of the car. Walking over to the other side to open the door for her and help her out.

They got out of the car and began walking up the driveway to Rossi's front door.

 The sound of her black high heels sounding so loud echoing in her head.

Before she knows it. Spencer is ringing the doorbell and JJ is answering the door.

She has no idea who this pretty blonde is wearing a purple dress, but she knows that she could definitely be competition for her.

"Spence hi!" She greeted him with a hug. "Oh my gosh, you must be y/n. OH, you're just as pretty as you were in your picture on Spencer's phone." She said before hugging her.

I'm Jennifer, but all of my friends call me JJ and I know that we're going to be friends, so feel free to call me JJ.

"Come on in, the whole team is waiting to meet you".

 Spencer took her by the hand, walking her through Rossi's spacious living room, through the kitchen and out into the backyard where everyone was.

Her chest began tightening, it beginning to be a little bit difficult for her to breathe as she was becoming overwhelmed with the amount of people that she was seeing. But Spencer's grip on her hand. Made her feel safe. She knew that she was always safe with Spencer.

"Oh my God is this her?!!" She heard another blonde shrieking. As she began running to her.

A blonde wearing a bright pink dress and high heels that were equally as bright. With the big flower on the side of her head. 

"Hi, I'm Penelope Garcia. Oh my God, she's so cute. Spencer, why didn't you ever tell us about her before?" She asked Spencer before pulling his girlfriend into a bear hug.

Before Spencer could answer. Rossi came over.

" So this must be the lovely Y/N I wish that I could say I've heard a lot about you, but I only recently found out about you. But if Reid like shoe, then you must be a wonderful young lady. My name is David Rossi by the way. I'm sorry I forgot to introduce myself."

"Oh, it's OK. Yes, I'm Y/N But I guess you already knew that from Spencer, right? I'm sorry, I'm not good at crowds or at parties. I Don't get out very much."

"No need to apologize or be nervous. As a profiler, I can see that you are nervous and there's no reason to be here. We are all a family, and you are now part of our family."

One by one, the rest of the team introduced themselves and gave her a hug before they sat down to a wonderful meal. Rossi really went all out tonight. As he always does. there was Lasagna. Ravioli. Tortellini. Fettuccine Alfredo.

Everyone was eating and having a good time. That was until it happened, something that Spencer thought was going to shake his world forever.

Penelope asked the question. "Why haven't you told us about her before now? I'm starting to get very Nervous because the last time you kept something like this from us, something big, you ended up in prison".

Spencer never told his girlfriend that he was in prison.

Everyone at the table gasped, and then the whole place went silent, everyone looking at Spencer. Spencer looked at his girlfriend. She wasn't saying anything, she was just frozen. Slowly, she turned her head to look at him before whispering. "Prison?".

The sadness in her voice, like a dagger through Spencer's heart. 

"Yes, prison I..i" was all Spencer could get out.

"Oh my God, did you not know? Did she not know?" Penelope said quickly. "I'm so sorry, I didn't know that you didn't tell her." 

"Can we go to the other room and talk about this?" Spencer asked quickly.

"Yes".

Spencer got up, then pulled out her chair, taking her by the hand. going to Rossi's living room. 

"I'm so sorry. I wanted to tell you so many times, but I didn't know how to. I didn't do the crime that I was Accused of. I Within Mexico. Trying to get some help from my mom. You know my mom, right? I did tell you about her. And I was accused of murdering the woman that I was buying the medication from, but I didn't do it. It was my nemesis who framed me for murder. And I spent three months in prison. And it was horrible. But I didn't know how to tell you that because I didn't want you to think badly of me or. Think that I was just as bad as your ex-boyfriend. I really do love you and I never meant to hurt you. I never meant to keep it from you. I just didn't know how to tell you. Please forgive me". Spencer explained, tears welling up in his eyes.

"Spencer, I forgive you. I'm not mad at you. I'm hurt. I'm not hurt because you didn't tell me. I'm hurt because you felt like you couldn't tell me. But I understand because there's something that I kept from you to my ex-boyfriend wasn't just lousy in bed, he was a lousy man altogether. He was very abusive. And that's why I had to learn how to fake orgasms because. If I didn't have sex with him. And didn't make him believe that I enjoyed it. He would hit me and threaten to kick me out on the street, and I didn't have anywhere to go. So I just had to keep faking it. Sex was not something that was enjoyable or pleasurable to me. It was a punishment, Until one day when I had enough. And I packed up when he went to work and used every bit of money that I had saved to buy the apartment that was next to you. That was the best day of my life, meeting you and finally knowing that there are good men in this world and I know that you didn't do anything wrong to be put in prison and I'm so sorry."

"I didn't mean to make you have sex with me if you didn't want to. I never meant to.." His words were cut off by. Y/n

"You are fine. I love having sex with you. I never thought that it could be something that I could actually enjoy, but with you, it's everything that people ever said that it was."

"Really?". He asked, holding her hand.

"Yes, really. You're going to keep your promise to me and Make Love to me when we get home, right?"

"Of course, but as long as you want it".

"Spencer, with you, I will always want it".

Spencer kissed her and then they walked back out hand in hand to finish dinner. 

"I'm so sorry". Penelope said. "I didn't know that you didn't know. I didn't know that she didn't know."

" It's OK. It's better that it's out in the open now. We both got a lot of stuff out and it's better this way. We shouldn't keep things from each other, and now we won't. It's fine. Can we continue having dinner now?" 

"Yes, let's eat bon Appetit". Rossi said.

The ride back home seems so much longer than the ride to get there, both of them just wanting to have each other so badly. If Spencer Reid was less of a man, he just would have taken his girlfriend right in the back seat of his car. But Spencer is a romantic and would never do something like that.

The dark blue dress that she was wearing was going to drive Spencer crazy all night long. Well, as long as they are at the party anyway. Spencer really wanted nothing more than to bring her back home and have his way with her. He was so glad when the party was over. Driving a little bit faster than usual because you couldn't wait to get back home and be with y/n.

" Your dress. My God, your dress. You look so beautiful. I know that I keep telling you this, but you just are just so beautiful."

" Thank you, honey."

The dark blue button up that he was wearing, with the sleeves slightly rolled up was driving her just as insane as the dress was driving him.

As soon as they were inside, he couldn't keep his hands off of her. Kissing y/n with passion before His fingers found the zipper of the dress, slowly unzipping it down her back. It's as though he wanted this moment to last forever. she didn't know that a zipper could be undone this slowly. Once the zipper hit the bottom of the track of the dress, he pulled it off of her shoulders, allowing the dress to pull to her feet. He watched the fabric slide down y/n's body as it did. Before looking up to see the Black Lacy underwear set that she was wearing underneath the dress.

" Did you wear this for me?" He asked her before kissing you on the lips.

" Yes, I did." You answered him between kisses.

"y/n Can I ask you something?"

" Of course."

He asked her a question between kisses.

" If I." (kiss) " Was a dessert." (kiss) " What kind of dessert would I be?" (kiss)

" You would be." (kiss)

Spencer's lips now made his way to her neck, kissing the spot that drives her mad.

" You would be." (moan) "My favorite dessert" she moans.

" Good answer" he said, before kissing her on the lips again. " Do you want to know what kind of dessert you would be?"

" Yes."

" You would be". (kiss) Then he Whispered right in her ear. " The desert I couldn't get enough of. The only dessert that I couldn't keep off of my mind. The only dessert that I would lose my mind if I didn't have. The only dessert that I have an insatiable appetite for."

He told her before picking her up and wrapping her legs around his waist and carrying her into their bedroom.

" Now, if you don't mind, I'm going to have some of my favorite dessert right now" he told her as he laid her on the bed before pulling down her underwear.

All she could do was Pant in anticipation, waiting for him to touch her.

" So beautiful" he said, before he put his head down and began licking her.

After one lick, he began moaning.

" So delicious. You don't mind if I just help myself to my favorite dessert, do you? He said before taking a suckle on her Clit.

" Ohh God Spencer, yes" she moaned out.

" Yes. Do you mind if I help myself to some of my favorite dessert? You want me to stop?"

" Spencer No, don't stop."

"OK, baby, I won't." He told her before going back down. The pleasure that he was giving to her was something she would never get used to. And would always be something that she craved. She moaned. She ran her fingers through Spencer's hair.

She orgasmed twice just from his mouth. 

"Spencer, please, I need to have you inside of me", she panted out. 

 Spencer wasted no time. He thought he was going to explode before being able to be inside of her. She was so wet and ready for him that he slid in with absolutely no resistance, both of them moaning out at the pleasure.

He moved so slowly inside of her fingers, in her laced with hers as he kissed her lips and neck. After they both Orgasmed together. They both laid in bed, cuddled in each other's arms, still panting, trying to get their breath back from such pleasure. 

"Was that worth the wait?" y/n asked.

"Are you kidding me? That was amazing. Unfortunately, though, we do need to get cleaned up". Spencer said. 

"Well, OK, a shower then?". y/n Suggested.

"A shower I think would be nice".

 His girlfriend reluctantly got herself out of his arms, attempted to leave the bed. But her legs were absolute Jelly.

She almost fell back down. 

Spencer told her "maybe a bath would be better" with a slight chuckle.

"Yeah, I think a bath would be good".

 Spencer kissed her. And went to the bathroom to draw the bath, putting in the vanilla bubble bath, the water steaming up the bathroom before he went back into the bedroom and carried her in. He held her up next to the tub and had her hold on to the side of the tub while he got in before helping her get in and sitting right in front of him. His arms wrapped around her instantly.

All of their secrets out in the open, all of their love known to Spencer's entire team. There was nothing left to hide anymore. There was nothing left to be nervous about. They are in love and plan on staying that way for the rest of their lives. They had a wonderful four days before Spencer was called away on another case. They knew that it was only a matter of time and spent every second that they could together. They truly were the love of each other's lives.

One night, four months after the team had met Her. Spencer lit a bunch of candles in His bedroom.

Before inviting his girlfriend over. Actually, he lit candles up pretty much all over the living room as well. Spencer let her into the apartment, and she walked in gasping at how many candles there were.

"Wow, this is a lot of fire" she said with a smile. 

"Well, I have something really special that I want to say tonight and, uh, I thought candlelight was the best way to ask. Wanted to make it as romantic as possible". He took her by the hand and led her to the bedroom. Where she saw all the candles lit and red rose petals. On the bed, in the shape of a heart. He let go of her hand, and when she turned around, there he was, on one knee with a diamond Ring in his hand.

"y/n I love you so much. When I'm not with you I feel like I'm going insane. You're the best thing that has ever happened to me in my entire life and I would love and be honored if you would be my wife".

 She began crying immediately before saying yes. He slid the ring on her finger and kissed her hand before moving up her body and kissing her on the lips. 

"The beds are ready for us, my beautiful fiancé". He said before kissing her once more. "But only if you want me to Make Love to you right now".

" Spencer Reid, I want nothing more than for you to Make Love to your fiancé. I want nothing more than to have my fiancé inside of me".

 That night, Spencer made love to her in a way that felt different than the other times. It felt like it was the beginning of a new journey, a new chapter for both of them. It truly was a picture-perfect proposal.

Wow, that was a lot of 4552 words. I hope that I didn't make it too boring and I hope to have the next chapter done Faster than I had this one done. But again, being a caregiver doesn't leave me very much time to write. So I brainstorm and then I try to write the best story that I can. Please leave comments, they help keep me motivated.

[st-eve-barnes]

You know that I'm no good (chapter 2)

(modern Aegon x Reader, modern Sihtric x Reader)

Summary: You want Sihtric. Aegon wants Skade. There's only one small problem: Sihtric and Skade are dating each other.

This chapter: Aegon tries to convince you to (fake) date him and the whole thing has an unexpected effect on you.

Warning for the entire series: 18+ for explicit language and smut. Angst/comfort/fluff. Fake dating and so much mutual pining. Mentions of depression/drinking/self harm.

This is an Aegon x Reader fic with a bit of Sihtric x Reader on the side. I've wanted to write a modern AU that combines The Last Kingdom and House of the dragon for a while now so here it is!

Thank you to everyone for the likes/comments and love for the first chapter, let's get this thing going ;)

Word count: +2700

Read chapter 1 Here

***

All my fics are also on AO3

***

You were having breakfast in a local coffee shop a few days later. It was still pretty chilly outside for a July morning but you had insisted on sitting outside near the river anyway, wanting to catch the first rays of sunshine before starting work.

You took a long, satisfying sip from your caramel macchiato and then almost choked on it when someone suddenly slipped into the chair in front of you, startling you.

“Fuck,” your hand grabbed at your heart,”Aegon, what the hell?”

Aegon was looking at you with a little smirk on his lips before he sipped from his black coffee. His long hair was framing his face this morning, curly and messy as if he’d just gotten out of bed, which was probably the case. He kept his eyes on yours as he spoke,”Morning, my darling.”

His morning voice definitely betrayed he hadn’t been up for very long.

“I’m not your darling,” you smirked back at him.

“Ahh, but you could be,” he teased.

You shook your head firmly.”Um…no.”

He placed his coffee on the table and put his hands together, giving you his best puppy dog eyes,”Come on, why not? It wouldn’t even be real, just a way to get their attention.”

You sighed,”Because…It’ll never work.”

“We don’t know that if we don’t try.”

You stirred in your coffee while you looked at him but kept shaking your head.

“We get along fairly well, right?” he then asked.

“We don’t know each other, Aegon.”

“Okay, but…we get along, right?” he just repeated, making you sigh again.

“Yes, I guess we do,” you caved.

“And, I mean the idea of being with me doesn’t repulse you or anything, does it?”

You smiled,”No, you don’t repulse me.”

That wasn’t a lie, he wasn’t your type but you could admit he was a pretty attractive guy, objectively speaking.

“Good,” he grinned,”I think I can stomach being with you as well. Just for the plan, you know.”

You hit him on the arm and he gave you a cheeky grin.

It was such a small moment but it made you realize how strangely comfortable you felt around him, despite not knowing him very well. Come to think of it he’d always had that calming effect on you, much like Helaena. Maybe it was a Targaryen thing (Aemond excluded of course because he made you feel anything but calm).

But was it enough to go through with this whole thing?

“I just…I don’t know if I can do it, Aegon. I’m not that good of an actress.”

“Will you try, please?” he asked again and for the first time you could hear the desperation in his voice. He wasn’t just playing around, he wanted this to work, he wanted Skade to notice him just as much as you wanted Sihtric to notice you.

“She means that much to you, huh?” you realized.

He avoided your eyes for a moment and returned the question,”He means that much to you?”

”I don’t even know him,” you admitted,”But I feel like I’d really want to.”

Aegon stayed quiet for a moment before he continued,”I don’t know her that well either, but…I really liked her, I didn’t want to kick her out of bed after fucking her, which is a lot for me.”

You rolled your eyes at that information.”Charming.”

“She had me so completely under her spell,” he continued,”And then, just like that, it was all over.”

“Hurts, doesn’t it?”

“Yeah,” he nodded,”So…can we at least give this a go? Let’s just go the club on Friday with the others and if we happen to see Skade and Sihtric there we can just…play it up a little, test the waters and see if they notice. And if they don’t we can drop the whole thing, no harm done.”

“I don’t know,” you still hesitated.

“Okay…well, I’m not going to push you if you really don’t want to.” His voice was sincere and it somehow made you more open to the idea.

You sighed deeply, thinking of Sihtric and how nothing you had done so far had managed to get his attention, after months of pining you were still completely invisible to him. Maybe it was time you tried something completely different, more bold. 

Like dating Aegon Targaryen.

“Okay, fine, maybe,” you caved.

“Maybe? Or fine?” 

“Okay, fine, god you’re so pushy,” you rolled your eyes again but also couldn’t help but smile at the way he was beaming at you, his smile lighting up his entire face now.

“Okay! Good, this is great! You won’t regret it, I promise.”

“Oh, I’m already regretting it,” you sighed but your smile stayed on your face as he kept his sleepy, blue eyes on you.

***

The club was filled that night, summer bringing in a mix of locals and tourists making the place more crowded than usual. Helaena was already on the dance floor when you arrived, giving you a quick wave before she returned her attention back to the guy she was dancing with, one of Jaces friends.

Aemond was sitting by the bar, as usual far away from the dancing crowd and focussed on watching everyone while he enjoyed his drink in peace.

You searched the room for Aegon but there was no sign of him yet. 

You ordered yourself a drink before deciding to make your way over to the dance floor to join Helaena. That’s when you saw him. And her.

Sihtric, and Skade, having a full-on make out session right in the middle of the dance floor. You instantly regretted coming here tonight and the urge to flee was growing fast. You could be on your couch right now under a warm, comfortable blanket watching a movie you loved instead of here, with heels that were painfully high and a dress that made it hard to move, forced to look at things that would only break your heart.

Just as you were about to turn on your heel you felt a warm hand on your arm.

“Where do you think you’re going, babe?” Helaena’s voice pulled you from your bad thoughts.

You smiled, pretending everything was okay,”To the dance floor, obviously.”

She locked arms with you and dragged you with her, leaving Sihtric and Skade behind.

After a few drinks and a few dances you were actually starting to feel a little bit better, as usual Helaena’s relaxed and positive aura managed to rub off on you. Or maybe it was also the alcohol taking the edge off a little bit, either way you were grateful for it. 

It lasted for about an hour, until you both exchanged the dance floor for a booth in the corner of the club and they were right there again, making out in the booth next to yours. 

If you didn’t know any better you would think he was doing this on purpose just to spite you. But of course he wasn’t, he didn’t even know you existed.

You lowered your eyes and avoided looking at them, feeling worse by the second until you felt a warm comforting hand on your knee. You looked up and much to your surprise it wasn’t Helaena but Aegon’s blue eyes that greeted you.

“Hey, my darling,” he teased, that familiar smirk back on his face.

“Hi, Aegon,” you smiled. 

“You look beautiful tonight, that dress really brings out your tits.”

“Aegon!” you laughed and shook your head.

“What? I can’t say that you have great tits? I’m your boyfriend, I’m allowed to say that, right?”

“Fake boyfriend,” you stated.

“Whatever, you look amazing tonight,” he was blushing a little now.

“Thank you, I guess,” you accepted his compliment.

“Are they here?” he then asked.

“Yeah,” you nodded at the booth next to yours,”They’re here.”

Aegon took one look behind him, finding Sihtric and Skade still all over each other, and immediately turned his attention back to you,”Damn.”

“Yeah, damn,” you sighed.

Despite your best efforts you couldn’t tear your eyes off them, the way Sihtric’s large hand moved up her thigh to pull her closer as he kissed her. The way she hugged him back, her perfect figure melting into his while his other hand tangled into her beautiful long blonde curls. She looked like the kind of girl every man fantasized about. She looked nothing like you. 

And just like that your self confidence started to crumble, Aegon’s compliment fading into the background while those voices in your head grew louder and louder, reminding you of all your insecurities. 

You look nothing like her. He will never want you. You will be alone for the rest of your life. 

Aegon noticed your absent stare and he squeezed your knee again, reminding you he was right there.

He moved a little closer to you, blocking Sihtric from your sight.“Hey, eyes on me,” he spoke softly,”Don’t look at them.”

You did as he asked, locking eyes with him.

“You alright?” Aegon then asked.

“Yeah, of course, it’s just the alcohol, it always makes me more emotional, I’m fine.”

That was only half a lie, it was mostly the Viking making you emotional, and the blonde who was practically sitting in his lap by now, claiming her territory.

Your thoughts were interrupted when Aegon grabbed your chin between his thumb and his index finger and turned your face towards his.”I told you to stop looking,” he repeated, firmer this time,”Don’t torture yourself like that, babe.”

“Sorry,” you sighed, lowering your eyes again but Aegon was quick to lift up your chin again, forcing your eyes to lock with his.

“Keep them on me, yeah?” he whispered.

You nodded and allowed yourself to shamelessly stare into his eyes. His gaze was soft but with a hint of mischief in there and you realized you had never noticed how beautiful his eyes were before now. For a moment you wanted nothing more than to stay lost in them. 

It had been a long time since you’d been this close to a guy and even longer since anyone had looked at you like that. Even if it was just Aegon and none of it was real, it still made you feel all warm inside.

“Can I touch you?” he then asked softly,”Just…to pretend…if you’re still up for it, that is.”

You smiled softly at him asking for your consent and you nodded your head.“Yes, you can touch me, Aegon.”

He smiled relieved and moved his hand up to cup your cheek, his thumb caressing your neck in the process and you actually shivered at his gentle touch. He leaned in a little closer to you as well, making it look as if you were almost hugging even though there was still plenty of space between you both.

Without speaking another word he moved his face closer to yours and softly nuzzled your cheek, his breath warm against your skin. You couldn’t help but feel your face heat up. You placed your hands on his hips and he smiled against your cheek.

“Is this okay?” you asked.

Aegon laughed softly,”Yes, it’s okay, sweetheart, you can touch me anywhere you want, you don’t need to ask.” 

Then he followed your lead and placed his free hand on your waist, pulling you a little closer to him while he nuzzled your jaw and your neck. You gave into it, leaning into his touch as you closed your eyes. When you moved your hand up to gently run it through his hair you could hear him let out the softest appreciative moan. It encouraged you to keep going and Aegon rewarded you with a soft kiss on your cheek.

“Well, shit,” Helaena’s voice made you both look up.

“What is it?” Aegon asked.

“This stupid plan might actually work,” she snickered.

“What do you mean?” you asked and you quickly took a sip from your drink, trying to hide how flustered you felt.

“Skade just had her eyes on you this entire time, Aegs,” she pointed out.“And Sihtric,” she turned to you,”I think you’re no longer invisible to him because he’s looking at you right now. They are so bothered, holy shit.”

You were lost for words at her statement and before you could check you watched Sihtric get up from his table and drag Skade with him. They passed by your group without acknowledging any of you.

Aegon laughed and you couldn’t help but laugh with him.

“Well, I guess we have to go through with it now, love,” he gave you a satisfied, cheeky smirk while his hand gently squeezed your hip.

“Yeah, I guess we do,” you sighed softly. You wanted to sound apprehensive or a little annoyed even, but all you could really focus on was that little spark of excitement bubbling at the thought of having Aegon as your devoted, handsy, fake boyfriend.

****

You blamed it on two things. 

The first was that you’d been severely touch starved for years now, it had been a long time since your last boyfriend and since then you’d only had a few short flings, each one as disappointing as the next. Needless to say it didn’t encourage you to keep up an active dating life and somewhere between those last flings you had just given up and focussed on your studying.

Then you’d started work and it became even harder to meet people. You always had a small circle of friends and plenty of acquaintances but finding that one special person seemed like an impossible dream, one you eventually stopped chasing.

You weren’t unhappy with your life, you loved your job in the local bookstore, loved your little apartment looking out on the Itchen river. Winchester was the best place in the world to live, you were sure of that even though you had never left the UK. 

The city was vibrant and lively but also somehow serene and filled with lots of nature and quiet spots. You had stuck around here after finishing university and hadn’t regretted it for a single second.

You met Helaena during your first year of university here and the both of you had become instant best friends. She and her family had lived in the city their entire lives. The Targaryens were old money, known by everyone in the city and owning some of the most renowned businesses in town. 

You never cared about the money, to you Helaena was just your quirky, sweet friend with her two weird brothers. (Probably three weird brothers but you had never met Daeron before so you still had to give him the benefit of the doubt.)

Anyway, back to you being touch starved, the point was you’d been on your own for a long time now without anyone to give you any sort of real affection. And you hadn’t even really realized that until that night in the club.

Which brings you to the second thing: Aegon.

You had never seen him as anything other than your best friend’s brother, and you still didn’t, it wasn’t that you suddenly developed feelings for him. But the way he flirted and took care of you that night, all those casual touches and innocent kisses on your cheek had awakened something in you and by the end of that night your emotions were all over the place.

And it wasn’t because of him, it was because he made you realize how badly you wanted that, a caring partner by your side, someone who looked out for you, made you feel less alone in this cold world. Someone to make you feel loved and wanted. There had never been anyone like that for you and Aegon’s kindness and affection reminded you of just how lonely you’d been.

After you’d said goodbye to him and Helaena that night you had felt a strange sort of emptiness clutch at your heart, like something vital was missing from your life. 

And with that feeling came a determination to go ahead with this plan however stupid it might be. It was time to take matters into your own hands and fight for what you wanted. Regardless of how it would end, at least you would be able to put an end to this pointless crush you’d been harboring for months now. 

If it didn’t work out, you could finally move on.

And if dating Aegon Targaryen was the price you had to pay to make Sihtric finally notice you, then you would happily pay.