#uhhh hit me up fellas

[neth-cactus]

iiiii ummm uhhh little drawings from the fic cus i fixated on my own writting jabsjwhdhe i have a looot to talk about so i will do it under the cut, the fic link will also be here

my girly pop, its weird posting stuff on ao3 but like shes there, the whole fic is me posting random little stuff i wrote on a whim so it will be noticeable dhbfjsjd also warning I might have made everyone a biiit out of character so im kinda sorry lols

now for fun notes and stuff about the chapters i did not add to the end notes

"The sun shines bright" not much to not other than after this clover's hand hurt for like a day and flowey bullied the peck out of them,,, also this is the only time flowey calls clover an idiot on this fic

"The flower pot incident" after the end clover spends like 10 minutes explaining everything about flowey, but he explains it like a little kid would, making it confusing as hell, so ceroba gives up and just like pats him and tells them to be good or smth, it was the same with everyone else

also bad quality comic of how the pot came to be

"What kind of milk were you?" the song came in as i was finishing the chapter and it fitted so well i named the chapter after it, as i mentioned it was me like poking gently to clover's life before the underground, his thought process was mostly thinking marlet was angry at them over doing the dishes in "secret" idk how to explain it but yeah :( poor little fella, also as noted at the end, flowey observed all happening and just like kept in mind

"Sewing back the pieces" I loved imagining how clover's room looked, and i had to include it, more joking around from the best friends, id like to think clover knows how to sew but they are just a bit clumsy with the needle, also those things are slippery...

"The calm before the mall" I feel proud about the title pun(? but this is also what i kind of meant with flowey keeping things on mind, by the time of this chapter a bit of time has passed of them living with humans, and flowey knows how stuff can be and how clover is a biiit shy so thats why the warning was persistent, it didnt work but meh

"Fertilizer is a fun word" IT IS A FUN WORD i love writing it lol, but seriously, i tried exemplifying more the thing of clover not speaking a lot so flowey does most of the talking for them, they do speak a bit but its short sentences and very quietly,

"You are just a boy, you are no man" this one will be long again the song fitted and it came on while writing the middle lol, clover does not know very well about the whole story with chara, but they do know that buttercups are meaningful in some sort of way for flowey so thats why they picked them, now is fun to note that the comments about their friends being monsters did bother clover but the one comment that like spilled the cup was the age one, that one hit deep and thats why they reacted that way, also the amount of people did not bother clover that much when they arrived but like the panic and stuff made them very aware of everyone around and med everything worse so ye, lastly, another time flowey calls someone idiot, this time dalv (sorry king)

i think thats all, if there's a specific choice yall are curios about feel free to tell me :3 i will probably have an answer for it

[thatbanditqueen]

Jam Session @ Graceland

A short snippet from Chapter 4 of No One Walks Out On Big Daddy, dedicated to @whositmcwhatsit​ because she puts up with me and makes me blush when she shines her brilliance my way and @stylespresleyhearted​ because she MADE this beautiful mood board for me and is the sweetest baby girl in the world..... and for @woundmetender​ and @powerofelvis​ because without them i am nothing... and anyone ever who reads or comments or likes or reblogs because your support and thoughts make this work what it is good, or bad... it’s your fault not mine see what your love makes me do (yes i both relate to elvis and want to fuck him....)

Listen to this song to set the mood

Warnings: Excessive fluff and some jealousy

***************************************************************************************

The chords from George Jones’ and Tammy Wynette’s hit duet “Something to Brag About” met Elvis ears as he thumped downstairs, and he stood at the entry of the den, noting the three empty beers on the coffee table and watching Becky take a sip from her beer as Charlie’s finger played the guitar while he sang,

But I've got something to brag about Something to brag about Something to brag about in you

Becky held her drink, closing her eyes as she sang out Tammy’s verse vigorously to the green carpeting above her head, the deep emotion in her voice warmed Elvis entire body as he watched her with the keen eye of a voyeur. He felt the prickle of desire buzz along the back of his neck as he gazed at her singing and bouncing up and down freely. The curls on top of her head seemingly had a life of their own, animated by the intensity of her delivery.  He liked the feeling of power he got watching her from doorway, knowing she had no idea he was there, she wasn’t responding or performing for him. Just existing in the world as the free spirit that she was.

When you're with the fellas, I know You start braggin' 'bout My hour glass figure and my big brown eyes

Becky giggled, moving her hands over her body as she sang.

Then a you tell your girlfriends 'bout my Sweet, sweet lov—‘

Just as Charlie started to sing the word lovin’ he looked at the door and gulped, his hands froze while the last chord still reverberated through the den’s acoustics. He knew the power of that star all too well, and the horror on his face showed his recognition.

Becky turned her head upside down, leaning back over the wooden serpent armrest,  that second beer had made her back impervious to its  hard ridges. A goofy smile spread across her upside down lips.

“Heyyyyy daddy!”

Elvis stepped forward, towering above her. His jowls hanging down as he tousled Becky’s hair from above, then pulled her single dress strap up the side of her shoulder from where it threatened to slip off and release Becky’s heaving bosom.

“Mmhmmm … hey baby…don’t let me interrupt y’all…” The edge in his tenor went over Becky’s head as she giggled, a dreamy look on her face as she blew a kiss up at him,.

Leaning back as she was, Becky missed Charlie’s nervous glance at Billy, and she pulled herself up, slapping Charlie’s knee. “C’mon Decatur,where were we.”

“Ummm, uh… I uh, forget how it goes from here…” Charlie coughed out.

Elvis staggered around the sofa behind Charlie, leaning down on his hands at the back of the couch.  “Hmmm….. maybe it’s time ta let a professional take over…?”

Becky guffawed, slamming down her beer on the coffee,  she raised her hands out for the guitar. “Don’t let him talk to ya that way, Charlie… I can play if you... if you forget how it goes from here….” Charlie shot Becky a weak grin, and leaned over to hand her the guitar as he shakily stood up.

“Thanks darlin, but uhhh,  need to use the John anyhow… y’all go on with out me….” Charlie twisted to look over his shoulder as Elvis plopped down in one of the large arm chairs across from the sofa. Billy sat in the other one, his face was blank and inscrutable as he nodded at his cousin, and squeezed Jo’s shoulder where she leaned into him from the green carpet.

Becky looked down at her hands, finding the chords on the neck of the guitar, then smiling at the others as she strumming lightly. Her voice was solemn and sad as it lifted up into “The Night They Drove Old Dixie Old,” pausing at the chorus to yell out, “C’mon on y’all, sing it with me….”

The night they drove old Dixie down And the bells were ringing The night they drove old Dixie down And the people were singing They went, "Na, na, la, na, na, la"

Jo joined in exuberantly, and elbowed Billy into singing. Elvis grinned, and pulled out a cigarillo, waiting as Billy paused his “na na nas” to hastily jump up and light Elvis’ cigar.

Becky laid the guitar down on the couch next to her when she finished the sing and stood, walking around the coffee table to sit on Elvis’ lap. He looked up at her, blowing his cigar smoke to the side,

“Dontcha know… that’s a man’s song?”

“Hmmm…” Becky purred as Elvis belly bounced into her and she leaned into his face, her fingers edging around Elvis’ cigar, pulling it out of his grasp to her own lips, a sly smile as she spoke. “Oh ya know…. I like…” she sucked on his cigar,  then exhaled as she finished her thought. “Men’s things….”

Elvis pulled his cigar back from her fingers, his lips hovered below her chin. “Already know that…”

Becky leaned her forehead down against Elvis’, his left hand jiggled her closer, and chuckled up into her mouth, his eyes danced behind his sunglasses.

“You know, you have a sad melancholy in that voice a yourn….” He murmured just to her, pulling Becky in the warm enclosure of his arms, a world where only the two of them existed and they spoke to each other in hushed, intimate voices as if no one was around. Billy and Jo looked at each other and shrugged awkwardly.  

Becky didn’t notice.

“You don’t like my voice?” she stammered, her lower lip trembling.

Elvis brushed his lips over her chin, closing his eyes as he tilted his forehead into her nose and growled into her breasts below. “Honey… I don’t like your voice……” he paused for effect, his left hand grabbing the back of her hair, loosening the bobby pins that held it up with the force of his fingers. His jowls vibrated as he intoned, deeply. “I loooove your voice…..”

Charlie coughed as he walked back in, and picked up the guitar to put it back with its stand against the wall. Elvis’ eyes shifted, momentarily brought out of his trance, but he left his head resting against Becky’s chin.

“Hand that over here, son…. nah, give it to Becky … ya a better gee tar player than I am any how…”

“Liar…you just lazy and wanna smoke that cigar...”

“Shut your mouth and get to playin’,” he blew his cigar smoke in her face.

“You still ain’t the boss a me… ”

His left hand lowered down to slap her side. “Hesh woman… c’mon, what are we singing…”

Becky grinned, and played the opening bars twice as she asked, “You know this one?”

“Ohhhh baby, I had that stuck in my head since the first night I met ya….” Elvis confessed, stubbing out his cigar in the green glass ashtray stand next to his chair.

“Alright, I’ll count us off.. one, two three…”

Then their voices roared together in unison as they sang the opening stanza of June and Johnny’s “Jackson…” Elvis’ face lifted up to Becky’s, her breasts bounced as she strummed and his left hand drummed out a fast rhythm on the bottom of the guitar from where it squeezed her waist. Her body rocked back and forth into his belly and she belted out a “HA!” as he sang this verse.

When I breeze into that city People gonna stoop and bow (hah) All them women gonna make me Teach 'em what they don't know how

Charlie looked at the others, his eyebrows raised, and Billy shrugged again, his eyes conveyed a knowing weariness. Neither Becky nor Elvis noticed this exchange, their eyes were otherwise occupied, and Becky leaned her nose down to nuzzle Elvis’s as she breathed out the next verse into his face through simpering amusement. Her warm breath sent a lightening bolt across Elvis’ body, which only increased with each thump of her bottom against his tummy, swelling up even more when his lungs expanded to sing.  He kissed the top of her shoulder softly as she leaned into him, finishing her stanza.

Yeah, go to Jackson You big-talkin' man And I'll be waitin' in Jackson Behind my Jaypan Fan

Becky purred along as Elvis sang the last chorus, swaying back and forth over his lap, and his arms closed tight around her as they hummed the last few notes together. They stayed in the den for hours singing, long after Billy and Jo found their children and said goodnight, Charlie tottered after them with a farewell. Their voices joined in happy harmony, mingling in the air was they started, stopped, paused, laughed and crooned together the melodies for “I Saw The Light,” “Don’t Think Twice,” “Louisiana Women, Mississippi Man,”  Elvis changed the words to Alabama woman in this last one, to which Becky responded with a chuckle, which made him laugh and they giggled into each other’s cuddles on the furry arm chair.

*****************************************************************************************************

I am 14K into this and on the last section....  my plan is to post this tomorrow morning, giving you the time you needed to recover from @precious-little-scoundrel​ and @everythingpresley​ gifts yesterday and before @elvisabutler​ sends everyone into a rebid frenzy with Spark.......

xoxo

noraHHHHHHH

[felikatze]

Bröther, the fuck is an isat and where do I get it. I am intrigued™

IN STARS AND TIME THE HIT INDIE GAME OUT NOW FOR PC ON STEAM AND ITCH.IO AS WELL AS PLAYSTATION AND NINTENDO SWITCH

you play as a funky lil fella names siffrin (the guy in the wizard hat) and they and their friends gotta defeat the king to save the country!! he's been stopping everyone in time and it really sucks of him.

except it goes wrong. and sif dies. and sif wakes up. and now he gets to fix all of his mistakes!!! isn't that epic!!

the main cast is INCREDIBLY charming i love them (i was already a big fan of the standalone demo game so i'm biased) BUT isat itself also writes them so good and aurgh i wanna hug all of them.

the game is BIG on character interaction and writing. a lot of times your rewards for a puzzle is seeing the main characters goof off and i love it!! every time!!!

the game also has a literal rock-paper-scissors battle system which while simple is a lot of fun actually? it works. not the best thing ever but it's fun enough and doesn't drag the experience down

the switch version of the game does stutter a bit whenever battles start but i got used to it

go watch the trailer to see how great the artstyle is also. i LOVE siffrin (again, the demo "start again start again start again: a prologue" was also marvelous [and that game is on sale for less than 3 bucks on steam rn]) and they're so.. aurgh. squeezes them like a stressball. he's literally perfect for this game. i mean. i already wrote abt it.

the core gameplay loop is, pardon the pun, the timeloop. you gotta explore and explore again and find the little tidbits to make it work and progress. talk to the right people, get the right items - it sounds overwhelming, but isnt very, since the game hands you plenty of tools to make it easier, and the explorable area is small enough to not be daunting. if you forget something, don't feel bad - siffrin also didn't remember.

i just hit act 3 which is when the meat of the plot begins but it took me uhhh sixteen hours to get there which may be bcuz i read the sleepover scene like 10 times bcuz it's cute.

if you love explorin and puzzles and cute fleshed out naturalistic characters and great worldbuilding and fun art and gay people (wow!!!!) this is the game for you

if you hate repetition and digging for scraps of change then this is not the game for you. but i love digging. so this is perfect for me, actually

[speakeasier]

hey, fellas. uhhh. i’ve been back from the wedding stuffs since monday. but i hate to say, everything absolutely went to shit during that time for me and some of the fam as a whole. i’m still angry, upset, hurt...i just. i hate it here so much right now. so sorry i haven’t hit any of y’all up, hanging, or anything of the like.

i’m still legit seething and reeling from what has gone down. i may be home as of now, but i think in a few weeks. hopefully even less. i’m going to visit and stay with some sac fam for a while. will probably let you guys know when/if i even do. but i need to get out of this house for a while. i genuinely can’t stand some people in it these few days.  

but yeah, until then. sorry, i needed a breather, but if anyone does anything i’m more inclined to be down now. i might even...I’M CONSIDERING??? maybe jank streaming a thing for once. just to take my mind off of everything. but yeah, just. i really was in that mode of speak to me and i will punch you aggro ever since last thursday. but while i’m still simmering, i at least came down a little. 

see you guys soon when shit goes down sometime.

とてもさんきゅう

[incorrect-hanna-barbera-quotes]

Huckleberry Hound: [walking into the room] Hey does anyone know wh-- Well My Goodness What Is With This Here Mess [The camera pans over to reveal Snagglepuss and Mildew Wolf standing above a deep pit in the floor. All of the furniture in the room is topped over and beat up, seemingly blown back by whatever created the pit.] Snagglepuss: I dunno! Why it was all like this when we moseyed on in here, too! Mildew Wolf: [not looking up from the pit] How deep do you think it is? I definitely don't remember anything like this being under the house so maybe its like uhhh ghosts or something Huckleberry Hound: [walking over to join them in inspecting the pit] Well now I've never heard of a ghosts that does anything like this. Explosion? Evrything's knocked over, so... Snagglepuss: What sort of bomb has enough force to blast a hole this deep in the ground but not enough to destroy the whole room with it? Something strange is definitely afoot here! Huckleberry Hound: Well either way let's see how deep this here thing is [throwing down a nearby chair] Mildew Wolf: Hey, that was my favori-- Snagglepuss: Shh! Listen... [The three men listen closely for the sound of it hitting the bottom, but no such sound is heard.] Mildew WOlf: Well that-- [Finally, they hear a distant noise, cutting him off.] Huckleberry Hound: How long was that? Snagglepuss: Well to be honest I wasn't actually keeping track but it sure sounds deep! Mildew Wolf: What should we do about this?? I don't think we can afford enough dirt to fill it in... Huckleberry Hound: Well gee, that's a good point...We could rebuild just the floor at least I guess. Snagglepuss: I guess so! Let's just cover it up for now, we should try seeing if we can find anyone who can figure out, what the devils caused this! Mildew Wolf: Sounds good to me! [The three men drag over a rug and cover up the hole, and then leave the room.] [A little while after they're gone, Peter Perfect walks in.] Peter: Say, fellas, does anyone know wh--WOAH!! [Almost immediately he accidentally steps on the rug and falls in.]

[garbagefarm]

Mutucule Farm #12

2023-03-10, Session #12 for Mutucule Farm, Winter 22 Year 1 through Spring 7 Year 2

cast:

Me (@mothmute)

Belle (@snacco​)

Cam (@amanitaspore​)

Erin (@salamand3rin​)

Highlights include, but are not limited to:

Cam decides he wants to keep some sheep sometime

Personally, I’m looking forward to getting a slutch and doing some slusbrandry

Erin forgot about my hat*, and was immediately disappointed

* - legally not a hat

I’m gonna pan for gold, a thing I actually bother doing, and a valuable and important mechanic in the game

(Pompkin makes his tail get big at the sight of it)

I use only the freshest egg to make Belle a chocolate cake (my egg reserves are off-limits)

Erin made some comment about needing hard wood (I don’t remember the full context)

We all agree that fitness is very important

Copper watering can! A can, for watering copper.

We have two choices for quests. One of them is for bones.

“you got me reading the locked tomb”

We all had a lovely time in the bone mines together! We all survived!

oh shit oh shit oh shit phew

Belle and Cam survived the bones, but died of the tired sleepy.

Oh hey, Robin made a bed, aaand Demetrius is being a smartass about it

“Yea”

Putting the bones in the bone chest ribcage

Deluxe barn!

Boneless skinless dungeon floor

Starmas!

Harvey is grateful there weren’t any medical emergencies. uhhh, didn’t we fuckin’ die a few times?

Belle gets a gift from Willy!

Cam gets a gift from Shane!

Erin gets a gift from Clint!

I get a gift from ... Willy again? Why’d he get two?

It’s nice of Robin to invite us to sit with her at the feast, but the chairs are all decorative. Can’t sit on ‘em.

Anyway, thanks for the gifts, we’re just gonna walk out on the “feast” part of the “feast of the winter star”— seeya!

Pompkin in my bed

“you shouldn’t have said anything”

IT WAS AN AMBUSH

Cam finally gets level 1 farming!! Yay!!

Artifact spot contains bones, a promising bone omen, or bomen

(everybody insists that “bomen” is actually a job)

I’m not gloating about how many bones I’m finding, just ... show-boning

“Peloton town”

Delicious secret notes, full of essential inks

Belle follows a secret note’s instructions to go into the woods in the dead of night to meet a bear

We hit the bone quota!!

Somewhere along the way, I pick up ... The Slammer. I’ve got better, so I hand it off to Belle, who immediately uses it to menace Cam.

borat voice: my wine

(nobody liked this, everybody got a negative moodlet)

Sheep named Buckle!

Cool pig day! Also, pig day!!

Pig name: Officer

Belle upgrades her backpack, giving us the best possible amount of money. (See gallery)

Last day of the season, I pick up a plush junimo.

Winter is over!!

Fella and Pompkin hang out together (see gallery)

Belle asks why my light radius is so big. I’m not glow-ting, but I’ve got multiple glow rings!

Secret note directs me to an ornate necklace. It’s still wet.

Heart event with Emily (Birds)

At some point, my bride-to-be (Penny) caught me digging through the trash! I’ve gotta make it up to her by giving her diamonds. People’ll excuse anything if you give them enough diamonds.

Penny sends me a note to meet her at the bathhouse after dark......

Pale ale for Pam is up, gonna drop it off in everybody’s chests

Cam’s chest overfloweth

Abigail’s mom will never know (about the necklace. It’s still wet.)

Big potato quest!

Belle does not like my potato field

Cam requests my strange buns 😘

(uses it to make a shirt for Belle)

I’ve got a hot date!

Hey, why does penny have a shadow or reflection in the bathhouse, and I don’t?

We agree to stop planting trees in the Beach Farm’s limited splash zone.

We don’t need 200+ common mushrooms, I’m gonna sell ‘em. That’s hog money!

Pigs are pricy, but they’ll pull their own weight. And sometimes a smuggler merchant cart, too!

Second pig: Detective

Emily requests an apricôt (the t is silent)

Mature single trees in your area!

“they have a root system!”

not anymore they don’t 😏

RIP Belle, died to skulls

lost The Slammer!! has to ask Marlon to get it back

Cam surprises me with a trash can shirt! ... but it’s a tank top.

Somebody put a Joja sign in my house??

I am not a corporate shill!

(I don’t need to shill for the cool, refreshing taste of Joja cola)

TO-DO:

Potatoes!

Expanded bees?

Backpack + Tool upgrades

Taller barn? Taller coop?

More pigs!!

Fences for the creatures?

house upgrades

Rainy day... (and 5,000g) (each)

fashion!!

oh right, bundles are still a thing

Iridium Sprinklers

... egg?

Link to photo gallery post!

[ciitrinitas]

hittin you with the uno reverse card, lessee uhhh makiden, asaden, angela/ayin, benjamin/ayin, hod/yesod, binah/hod

oh boy, lots of good ones here...

(in response to this!)

makiden - A+: OTP.

makiden is so good. prime badtouch material. but the way that they're more than that? part 1 of chainsaw man is nothing short of a plea for empathy, and that for all her flaws, for all her mistakes, for all her horrible acts, it doesn't ask for makima to be forgiven, but for her to be understood--it drives me insane. she never really saw denji, and he was a means to an end for her, but he still loved her. like, ugh, they're really hard to talk coherently and eloquently about because makima is absolutely an abuser and denji her victim, but makima is also a victim. csm doesn't intend to absolve her; it asks that you understand that she is another step in the cycle of abuse.

makiden is the meat and potatoes of csm part 1. incredibly sexy on every level, but also so narratively and thematically compelling. i really can't say enough about how much i love them. it's really hard for me to talk about why they do so much for me without going into a long ramble about why i also love part 1 of csm so damn much. makiden as a relationship is utterly vital to it.

asaden - A+: OTP.

i swear i have denji ships that i wouldn't qualify as otps! (the other one that hits that tier is akiden. u_u) but, god, what a fucking life i am living. this went from a borderline crack ship to having actual canon potential. initially, i was pretty invested in it from the angle of self-hating moronsexual mitaka (it works for asayoru, too! just act stupid, and mitaka will be cursing how horny she is seeing you fail to solve basic math makes her), then oh my god...oh my god, they went on an actual canon date. and mitaka was convinced infodumping all the research she binged the night before at denji would make him hot and bothered for her, and she's legit so charmed at him being a good guy (HE WANTS NAYUTA TO GO TO COLLEGE). i'm doomed. i'm absolutely doomed. i'm deluded enough at this point to have true canon aspirations for asaden and feeling a salty victory at some annoying yshdn shippers i've seen think it stood a chance at being canon when yshd still barely has a character.

thanks for ruining my brain twice over, fujimoto. like, GOD, HE WAS LISTENING DURING HER RAMBLING!! HE ASKED HER OUT AGAIN. I'M GONNA DIE. I SHIPPED THEM FROM EARLY ON. i fully expect it to go south because chainsaw man, but god am i fucking living right now.

angela/ayin - A+: OTP.

thanks for bullying me with just a bunch of my otps because i love too many things and stick the otp label on them. but, boy, this snuck up on me with lobcorp. the ending absolutely makes lobcorp, elevates it to a level of brilliance imo. angela spends the entire game, spends hundreds of years, operating on ayin's script (and i'm very curious to what extent that included, to what minutiae her words were dictated by him. did he set things so specifically that she decided to always introduce herself as such a Special and Advanced AI to him lmao?) until she finally has free will in her grasp and crushes the culmination of his and everyone's suffering to exercise it. it's just so fucking good. spending so much time simmering in hate and bitterness for this man while being made to assist him again and again and again.

and ayin, buddy...friend...fella...you literally just made your crush as an ai but with bigger tits after she died. if that isn't romantic, i don't know what is. but, seriously, the fact he was so heartbroken at carmen's "death" (because she did live on in a fucked up way as the heart of this literal purgatory) only to immediately reject angela because oh...well...he wanted carmen back, but this isn't carmen. angela was made as a replacement that could never fulfill her purpose, and yet ayin kept her so close for so long.

it's deeply fucked up, and it makes me insane. thanks for giving angela daddy issues, ayin. at least let her choke you a few times as compensation!

benjamin/ayin - B: It’s really cute.

benjamin is the funniest motherfucker in lobotomy corporation. even more than ayin himself. i am absolutely desperate to know the hard timeline for how the hell the timey-wimey shit works out for where he always appears as "benjamin" before being shoved in a robot to reappear as hokma. because, man, getting shoved in a toaster sure does something to the guy! like, ayin, let's just be here together in robot purgatory because no one needs to die and we can be husbands and forget carmen like i can put on a wig if you need me too it's fine seriously i don't mind just please god stay with me forever. 💗💗💗

hod/yesod - A+: OTP.

I MADE THIS SHIT UP. I FUCKING TRICKED MYSELF INTO THIS. THEY BARELY INTERACT, but like, one day, i was like oh boy i like hod but what if she Could Make Someone Worse? i went down the list, and malkuth? nah, too strong of a personality versus hod. netzach? it'd be sort of mutual self-worsening between those two. it'd be a whole essay on its own about why it didn't fulfill what i was looking for, but i have Thoughts, i swear. hod/binah? oh, no one can out worse binah. hod/angela? pretty similar to hod/binah.

but. oh. hod/yesod? there's this distinct point of connection for them in their mutual anxieties as a point of exploitation. hod wants to be helpful, wants to be needed, and yesod is someone that holds himself together tightly until he isn't. a little undoing, and oh, wow, he really needs hod's assistance, doesn't he? maybe it's a little nudge from angela (it gets boring repeating shit, okay) or hod herself just Noticing, but hod is not above setting someone else up to be at just the level of functioning where they often fall apart and need to rely on her to get by. yesod is the king of options for hod making someone worse and being the dominant partner. he might have the stronger personality, but he isn't without some degree of humanity, and hod can slowly worm her way in there.

this is sheer nonsense based on me huffing whatever the fuck this ship is. yesod just needs to be a little desperately vulnerable, and hod would be such a good helper! everyone wins! ^_^

binah/hod - B: It’s really cute.

okay, to an extent with binah ships, my brain just empties out and goes oh wow big sexy. i like how casually manipulative and in control binah is (or seems) in every situation. hod is super cute and desperate for validation. let her snap a little, and you'd have a real great violence breakdown girl with some manipulative reassurance. gaslight, gatekeep, girlboss, binah. you're so valid.

[arc-misadventures]

Your Thief

Jaune: Okay, okay, okay… I can do this, I can do this…

Nora: Don’t worry, you can do this, Jaune!

Jaune: Thanks, Nora… I-I’m just nervous… O-Okay… Lets do this…

~~~

Yang: Hmm? Who’s calling me?

Weiss: Unknown caller? Maybe it’s him?

Yang: Him…? Oh, him?! Okay, okay, okay… Play it cool, Yang you can do this, you can do this…

Weiss: Uhhh…?

Yang: Hello, Officer Xiao Long speaking?

~~~

Jaune: Xiao Long… Well ain’t that a pretty name…

Nora: Nice!

~~~

Yang: He thinks my name is pretty!

Weiss: O-Okay…?

Yang: Thank you, but who am I speaking to?

~~~

Jaune: Oh my apologies, it’s your… Thief. Yes, it’s your Thief speaking.

Nora: Oohhh~! Smooth~!

~~~

Yang: My Thief? Ohh… You’re the lucky fella I gave my number to.

Weiss: Your thief?

Yang: This bastard is smooth as hell!

Weiss: Maybe to you.

Yang: Shut it!

Yang: So, tell me, my Thief; Aren’t you going to tell a pretty lady your name?

~~~

Jaune: Well, I could, but wouldn’t you prefer to hear me say it face to face?

Nora: Ohh, I like the build up here! Setting up the trap as you go along, nice~!

Jaune: Let’s just hope it works.

~~~

Yang: Hmm… I would much prefer things that way… So, what are you proposing to do; Steal me away for a night of unbridled passion~?

Weiss: What are you saying?!

Yang: I’m testing him! I ain’t going on a date with a man who wants a quick one night stand!

Weiss: Ohh… Good call…

Yang: And, you think I’m an idiot.

Weiss: I do, just not about these things!

Yang: What things?!

~~~

Nora: Oh~? Looks like she’s setting up her own trap~!

Jaune: Oh? In that case: Are we going to sit on a couch watching silly cartoons all night long, or would you prefer a night out on the town dancing the night away?

Nora: Damn, that does sound nice…

~~~

Yang: Fuckkkkkkk! Both of those sound fantastic!!!!

Weiss: I’m not so sure about the cartoons, but that does sound fun.

Yang: So, you are gonna threaten a lady with a good time~! All right then, how are you going to steal me away then?

~~~

Nora: She took the bait!

Jaune: How am I doing this?!

Nora: Who cares, just keep going!

Jaune: Well, as invigorating as that all sounds, that feels better for a second date. After all, I know little to nothing about you, and you know nothing about me. So how about a simple meet up for lunch, a get to know you kind of thing? After that we can talk about dancing the night away, and how I can steal you away~! How does that sound?

~~~

Yang: This smooth motherfucker… He’s hitting all my buttons?!

Weiss: You seem easier to hit then you thought…

Yang: Excuse me?!

Yang: Alright, I’m game. I’m free tomorrow, what shall we do then?

~~~

Nora: Go in for the kill, Jaune!

Jaune: I know this lovely little café; nice homely feel, smooth jazz, warm food, good drink; The Coco Bunny Café, how does that sound to you?

Nora: The Coco Bunny Café? Coco’s, and Velvet’s café?

Jaune: I know this place, and what kind of food they have; home field advantage!

Nora: Ohh! See, that’s why your the clever one!

Jaune: Oh, your way smarter than you look, Nora.

Nora: Naww… Thanks~!

~~~

Yang: The Coco Bunny Café…? Weiss?!

Weiss: I’ve been there once before, it’s really nice place. Your Thief has good taste.

Yang: Alright then, sounds like a date~!

~~~

Jaune: Alright then, say noon tomorrow, I’ll text you the directions to the Café.

~~~

Yang: I’m looking forward to it, Thief~!

~~~

Jaune: Till then my dear.

(Click)

Jaune: …

Nora: …

Jaune: I’ve got a date!!!

Nora: Whoo! Hell yeah! You did it, Jaune!

Jaune: I did it?!

Nora: I know, it’s shocking.

Jaune: Just gotta call, Velvet, and reserve a spot at her café…

Nora: I already did that! She’s giving you the window seat~!

Jaune: Really, that’s really nice of her.

Nora: Yeah, after I told her it was because you had a date, she gave you the spot in a heartbeat!

Jaune: …

Jaune: Coco actually gave me that seat because she wants to spy on us didn’t she?

Nora: Hell ya she did~!

Jaune: …

Jaune: Okay then…

~~~

Yang: I’ve got a date! Oh gods, I have a date?!

Weiss: Relax, Yang you’ve got this.

Yang: But, do I?!

Weiss: …

Weiss: Why don’t you be ask, Ruby for help? She’s your sister, she can handle this better than I ever could…

Yang: Good idea! Okay, lets see… favourites… Ah-ha! Cookie Gremlin…

Weiss: Cookie Gremlin…?

Ruby: Hey, Yang, what’s up?

Yang: Hey, Ruby, I was wondering if you could help me out later?

Ruby: Oh, what do you need sis?

Yang: Okay, so I have a date tomorrow, and…?!

Ruby: YOU HAVE A DATE TOMORROW?!!!

Weiss: …

Weiss: Well this should be good…

[whumpzone]

Linden & Colton - 26

(masterlist)

CW: pet whump, dehumanisation, a tiny mention of throwing up

this is a flashback chapter! but since I want to keep the chapters specifically titled Flashback to be about Col's old master, this one can be a proper chapter. besides, it's been long enough <3 this chapter incorporates some text from this ask and I suppose this ask is a continuation!

-

Linden looked between the bored council worker and the pet at his feet.

He and the worker exchanged meaningless pleasantries. It all became very real in an instant. He couldn’t back out now. He didn’t want to back out, but- the reality still hit him like a blow to the stomach. His hand tightened around the doorknob.

The pet was frozen; the only part of him that was moving at all was his hair, a breeze lightly combing through it.

“No problems with sight, no sign of illness, uh, ate what he was given, uh….”

Linden bent at the waist slightly, smiling down at the pet, although the smile went unseen.

“Hello, there.”

Nothing. The man didn’t move an inch, except to squeeze his eyes shut. Linden paused.

“Can he speak?”

“I don’t think so, hasn’t said a word since we got him in… can you speak, pet?”

Linden watched, hoping for some reaction, but he stayed motionless.

“He can hear, though,” the worker added, predicting Linden’s next question. “Yeah, so… there’s that.”

The breeze picked up, but the man knelt in Linden’s doorway didn’t react.

“I suppose there isn’t much else you can tell me about him,” he asked flatly.

The worker stretched his neck, thinking. “Uhhh… he’s a big fella, but not a fighter by the looks of it.”

Linden noted the slim leash. Other than that, the only other restraints were the handcuffs holding his hands behind his back.

It was true, the man looked like he’d be tall if he stood to his full height, but at present he wasn’t even daring to look up. Linden hadn’t fully considered the fact that the pet might have been violent. God, he might have had to actually restrain him, if that had been the case.

Am I insane? Linden suddenly thought, both frantic and oddly calm. Is this an insane thing to do? It’s too late now, anyway. What on earth is Vik gonna say?

“Okay, thank you. Enjoy your day.”

The leash was exchanged, the handcuffs removed. The worker gave him a quick nod goodbye and rattled away in his van as Linden looked down at the figure outside his house.

. . .

Pet couldn’t breathe.

He really couldn’t breathe. Terror weighed so desperately on his chest that he couldn’t draw any air into his lungs.

He was back. After all these months he was back, back in the clutches of a sole human, outside the house that would become his entire world in just a few moments.

It was all going to start again. He was going to re-learn how to please his owner. Every bit of his body and mind was going to be broken and re-set to his new Master’s desires.

“Hello, there.”

Pet hadn’t been spoken directly at in a long time. He was so accustomed to having humans talk about him as if he wasn’t there.

He was used to being tested, however. He’d been given no direct orders, nor permission to answer. He kept being good, with his head bowed low.

“Can he speak?”

“I don’t think so, hasn’t said a word since we got him in… can you speak, pet?”

The last thing I’m going to do is take an order from someone other than my Master, thought Pet. No. I have to show him that I’m loyal. If Master asks me, then I’ll speak.

His new owner was apparently satisfied with his silence, though.

Distantly, Pet felt himself wilt, just a tiny bit. This Master didn’t care to let him speak, then. This could be it for life. He might never utter another word.

But it was fine, it was fine, he was owned and this was what he was for, wasn’t it? Hadn’t he felt empty and scared and lonely on the streets? Hadn’t he been just days from starvation before those humans stuffed him into a cage at the local shelter?

His sinking heart was betraying him. He wished he could just be good, he wished he could be overjoyed at being given another chance to serve his only purpose.

The thought of punishments shouldn’t scare him, they were necessary. They helped.

Why did he want to throw up?

Pet would do anything to please this man. What silly animal thoughts could he ever need to articulate, anyway? Why was he acting like he was capable of having ideas worth saying?

“He can hear, though. Yeah, so… there’s that.”

“I suppose there isn’t much else you can tell me about him.”

Pet would know displeasure a thousand miles off. His new owner was looking down at him in irritation. Pet wondered what the punishment would be if he pressed himself to the cold stone and begged then and there that he would be worthy.

“Uhhh… he’s a big fella, but not a fighter by the looks of it.”

That’s right, thought Pet, his eyes widening with emotion. I’m not a fighter, I’m nothing, I’m absolutely nothing. You can mould me, Master. I’ll be whatever you want. I’ll earn my stay and maybe you won’t have to hurt me too badly.

Having got all the information he needed, Pet’s new Master sent the handler away and Pet took the deepest breath of his life. In half a second he took in the coolness of the wind, the fresh air, the sound of birds and dogs and cars, knowing with absolute certainty that he would never be among any of it again.

. . .

The man was dressed in shorts that looked too small, and a t-shirt with a design so faded it looked like static. Even after the handcuffs had been taken off, his wrists remained crossed across his back. Like any movement might be the wrong one.

“Come in, come in.”

Linden was put further on edge when the man crawled in, still staring at the floor, still silent.

He bent down to unclip the leash and saw him flinch, oh god, oh fucking hell he was in so far over his head.

He took several steps back, winding the leash around his hand nervously. He needed a second.

All he knew was he had a spare bedroom, and enough time off work. He had food, and a harmless cat, and he guessed he would figure the rest out as he went.

“It’s okay, everything’s okay, I’m- I’m- I’m going to make it okay.” Linden felt like he was speaking to himself rather than the pet. “You don’t have to stare at the floor. You can look around.”

He felt more than a little relieved when the man obeyed.

His hair was a sandy kind of blond, and Linden was fairly sure that his eyes were green. It was hard to tell when they were moving across his house so rapidly. Linden had naturally noticed the endless collection of scars up and down his body, but as the pet lifted his head, he could see one more: a white line across his left cheek.

He lifted a hand to his own cheek and felt the soft flesh there. He was uneasy even imagining the pain that accompanied that single wound. What on earth had this man gone through? And- Linden thought despairingly- how would he ever earn his trust?

Looking to the side, into the living room, Linden saw Jaffa's empty cat bed, a small symbol of his peaceful household. Okay. Maybe things could be okay.

No- he would make sure they were okay. This man was his priority now. His property too, unfortunately.

He made his way a little bit closer to the man. “This will be your home now. For… the foreseeable future. I know you didn’t get a choice in this, and I’m sorry. My name is Linden.”

. . .

Pet couldn’t take it all in. A new house, a new Master, a new life. It felt like his thoughts were moving too fast for his brain.

“It’s okay, everything’s okay, I’m- I’m- I’m going to make it okay.”

Pet exhaled and breathed in the indoor air for the first time. He would have to savour this too, before he was taken down to the basement. He remembered the smell of his old home well enough- his own blood and filth, with nothing to dilute it.

The wording was odd, but it sounded as if his new Master was looking for a project. A pet that needed some heavy refurbishments. And of course, he could speak however he liked- Pet would need to get used to it, learn to read between the lines.

“You don’t have to stare at the floor. You can look around.”

Pet obeyed without thinking, but it struck him what a kindness this was. There was no need for him to see the house; he would spend most of his life chained away or blindfolded, and it wasn’t as if he were allowed to speak to compliment his new Master’s home.

Crouched in the doorway, he looked into the house. It was wooden and old; the bannisters were worn with age, the floorboards were exposed, and Pet’s new owner stood amongst it like an add-on. He was dressed in brown and pine green, with long black hair, and dark skin. Shadowy, Pet thought. The man, his Master, had a faraway look to him. Guarded, even a little suspicious.

Particles of dust floated between them as Master slowly came closer. Pet could only brace himself for whatever was about to happen. Master could strip him down, inspect him, hurt him, throw him into the basement and lock the door. He could do whatever he wanted to his new living property.

“This will be your home now,” Master said slowly. “For… the foreseeable future. I know you didn’t get a choice in this, and I’m sorry. My name is Linden.”

Pet listened. Master’s name went through his head, but didn’t linger. He knew it wasn’t for him to use.

“I’m going to take this off,” Master said, and usually this kind of warning meant Pet was supposed to prepare himself- take his shirt off, or turn around to offer his back, or hold out his wrists- but he had no idea what Master was even referring to. Panic set in. What was he going to do to him? What was there to take?

Master reached out and Pet didn’t flinch this time, because he knew better. He couldn’t suppress a gasp, however, when he felt cold fingers brushing against his throat. His Adam’s apple bobbed as he tried to swallow his fear.

He was so distracted by his own terror at what might be happening that he didn’t realise Master was undoing his collar until he pulled it away from Pet’s neck entirely.

He was untethered, again.

He’d been without a collar the whole time he’d been a stray. So long in fact that when he was collared just a few days ago, he had felt trapped, frightened, hardly able to breathe. Pets were meant to be collared. It had only backed up what he already knew, that he was defective in every way, that he never learned, that he needed to take a lot more pain before he could serve his purpose.

He almost reached a hand up to feel his bare skin, but caught himself. Was he trying to get a beating?

“That’s okay, you can touch it. You don’t need a collar in this house.”

Pet was so shocked he almost looked directly at his Master. He wasn’t just replacing the collar with another one? This was it?

He shouldn’t have felt relieved. He was bad. At least his old master had known that, and knew how to keep him in line. This Master was going to find out by himself. Pet was going to disappoint him at every turn until he realised that only the harshest discipline could keep him in line. And that meant a trip to the bedroom, an extended session with the handcuffs and restraints and-

His own pounding heartbeat brought him back to the present.

“You look so cold,” Master mused, though he spoke so quietly Pet wasn’t even sure if he was meant to hear it. “Come, follow me, and I’ll see what I can do.”

-

taglist part 1:

@newbornwhumperfly @whumpadump1939 @firewheeesky @whump-me-all-night-long @captain-seconds @grizzlie70 @unicornscotty @lave-whump @princessofonwardsworld @cupcakes-and-pain @bumbumbea @whumpfigure @yet-another-heathen @secretwhumplair @whumps-up @as-a-matter-of-whump @getyourwhumphere @itzagoodthing @whumpymirages @soapparentlyilikewhumpnow @the-monarch-whumperfly @penny-for-your-whump @briars7 @legallylibra @angel-stars @loyds-of-registry @tears-and-lilies @badluck990 @rosesareviolentlyread @vickytokio @neuro-whump @thingsthatgo-whump-inthenight @whumpsy-daisies @control-whump @theydy-cringeworthy @starnight-whump @cursedandtired @jo-doe-seeking-inspo @justabitofwhump @glamrockgregory @rippedjeansandfadeddreams @genesissane @justbreakonme @addyez @httyd-chocolate @littlespacecastle @haro-whumps @extrabitterbrain @neverthelass @downrivergirl914

[1ddiscourseoftheday]

🗣Tues 15 Dec ‘20🙊

Anyone order their daily with EXTRA DISCOURSE today? Lucky you, I guess, I'd send it back to the kitchen if I had the option but this is more a 'you'll take what you get and like it' kind of establishment so here we are! EAT UP we got Liam and Lou Teasdale making everyone mad, Louis and Harry's teams forgetting they're supposed to be mortal enemies, and Zayn?? Getting papped?? Omg is Z3 really coming this time? I've been burned so many times before (flown too close to the sun) but what if....... So first Gigi and zaby stroller were papped, then Zayn was papped in his usual way-- 'if you can get a good picture of me in the seconds it takes me to walk from my front door to the car have at it, that's exactly all you get'-- and then a fan reported seeing Zigi and zaby at a pizza restaurant. Zayn's hair is bleached white blond and that's about all I can tell you except that Z NEVER gets papped (or spotted really) for nothing so I am excite!!

Liam's back! He did the postponed-from-last-Tues hour long live for Stand Up To Cancer (and raised $16k!) and he's got a show in two days so I'd say his extremely brief breather is probably done with, whether he got the time he needed to be happy about coming back or not. He seems in good shape for the live though, even if he does say “its been a really long day, you don't even know, REALLY long” and that what he wants most for Christmas is “to have a little bit of time to reflect.” But he says he is going to take some time out and go away and write music “for the first time in a very long time,” in the new year, nice! He mentions how he went up to Sweden for recording recently and says it ”went really well I'm really really excited” about the new music and, uhhh, “got something sent through from Mick Fleetwood while I was over in Sweden writing, some guitar stuff, which was amazing, and he was dressed like santa at the time!” I...what??? I'll just... leave that there?? About other bands, he says that he's become a big fan of the Wanted over time, that “someone Zayn-ed out,” of Little Mix but “Zayn left for pretty much the same reasons and I do feel for them,” and “are 5SOS still together? Did they pull an us I thought they pulled an us?” He said yes, it's so great about Louis' show, and “it was great, and do you know what, like listening through those lyrics, it’s really nice to hear the truth in his music because obviously I mean I know all of the full story about him, and [pause].. and uh... his relationship with his girlfriend and whatever else,” SKLDYSSKKJ.

This long live also had him responding to screen comments he would usually ignore (though thank GOD he only reads but doesn't answer 'what happened with Niall in Japan' please tell me the questioner wasn't trying to get him to comment on the 'violently masturbating' story), anyway so we got Liam on touching his hair if larry is real-- “of course that's not going to happen don't be silly,” and on whether he thinks 'larry is disrespectful' “sometimes I do... actually that's not true, all the time I do.” Well he's not wrong though I'd expand that to 'all the fans' but if I had to wade through a million “touch your nose if larry is real” comments every time I was promoting my own material, for ten years, I'd probably get tetchy too! He didn't say it was or wasn't real, as he himself pointed out he never WILL do that for REASONS; tbh I'm with Liam can people PLEASE stop being so embarrassing on main and let him live? ANYWAY, moving on, his Advent Alarm clock today is the sleep story edited down to be just Liam laughing for like 30 seconds, aka the exact edit that I suggested they should make a couple weeks ago, which I find frankly extremely alarming (ALARMing HA) are they... listening to me?? Well if Liam's management are looking for ideas BOY HAVE I GOT SOME FOR THEM hit me up fellas PLEASE.

Harry and Louis both announced further postponements of their UK and Europe tour shows, like really the same announcement and just fully back to back, I can only assume that after weeks of intensive hashing out to match up dates their teams have arrived at some kind of plan and were like cool let's announce! Louis has added some new shows, while Harry's new schedule is undisclosed as yet. Harry says “I really hope to play these shows and will have news for you in the new year on when they will take place.” Louis' new dates include previously omitted countries (Iceland! Austria!), and those tickets go on sale Friday. Harry did not respond to Rob Sheffield's awkward attempt to link Watermelon Sugar and WAP as being similar but he did like Megan Thee Stallion's post celebrating her successful year, and Vulture ranked Adore You in its top 5 videos of the year with a much better take on what Harry is all about, saying that it “highlights one of the singer’s best traits: his willingness to be delightfully weird.” Kid Harpoon said that he and Harry “wrote a song in Japan that may yet see the light of the day,” and Harry continues to roast him, disputing his songwriter of the year award-- “they found 8,000,000 opposing ballots in a bin behind his house! FRAUD!”

And last but most discourse-y-est of all, The Sun made waves today, pulling the most salacious parts of a Lou Teasdale interview with the Sex, Lies and DM Slides podcast from last week and bringing it to wider attention. In the interview she talked at length about systemic discrimination against women working in the music industry and her own work experiences, which naturally include (very briefly) touching on her highest profile job- the years she spent traveling with 1D. In this context she says “you kind of can’t sleep with them [the band]- it’s quite important to keeping your job... some people would come in and like you know assistants and stuff and I think they would really think... that it was love and obviously it’s not,” and “it’s just the quickest way to lose your job- because then they’ve got a new girlfriend and she’s there and they don’t want you in the room.” She did not sell her story to The Sun she mentioned this in passing as part of an interview about her work experiences; she herself says, “I didn’t do an interview [with] the sun. I’ve never done that. I did a podcast with friends about loads of things.”

There is nothing remotely unlikely in this story, either in the concept that members of the band slept with girls casually (we know that certain of them did and there isn't even anything wrong with that in a situation of consent, the denial of it is as bizarre as scribbling out the beer bottle in a 28 year old man's hand), or that low level members (“assistants and stuff”) of the 150 person+ crew appeared and disappeared on a regular basis. The band were, to my guess, probably simply not paying very much attention to the serious ramifications of this carelessness and the consequences rather than demanding that people be fired, but I do very much hope they've learned over the years to be responsible for the kind of power that they have over other peoples' lives (something I really doubt they understood the extent of yet as very young people being dragged from one place to another who felt powerless themselves).

[mugi-chan]

Hii! First off: I LOVED THE WAY YOU WROTE MY REQUEST!!! it was absolutely everything I wanted and more!!! And second, can I request scenario(s) with the dorm leaders with an so who loves animals and tries to sneakily keep a pet. Thanks!!! Looking forward to seeing it!!

ლ  Content: Dorm leaders: S/O sneaking in animals 

ლ  Warnings: None!

ლ Comments: I just realize most of the s/o has pet bunnies whoopsie              ヾ(｡﹏｡)ﾉﾞ

Key: 

(a/n)-Animal name

Riddle was coming over to visit you but had shown up a little early. He knocked the door a few times but didn’t hear anything, he knocked a few more times waiting for a response. When not getting a response he goes and finds the spare key  and unlocked the door. 

“(y/n), are you home?” Riddle called out to the empty house

He heard a little giggles down the house. He got suspicious and walked into the home dropping off his little present he brought for you. He walked down the hallway near your room and he could hear more giggling from you. He knocked on your door startling you. 

“(y/n)?” Riddle called out, hearing you shuffle a bit. He opened the door to see you holding something behind your back. 

“(y/n), what are you hiding?” Riddle asked leaning over trying to see what’s behind your back. 

“O-oh nothing” You stuttered, you were lying to both you and Riddle knew that. Riddle gave a smirk and tried to see what’s behind your back. You keep moving away trying to hide what’s behind your back. 

“(y/n) what’s behind your back?” Riddle smiled, this little game of yours was fun. He saw a glimpse of a long ear behind your back which made Riddle stop. 

You stopped as well looking at him, Riddle’s smile faded away. 

“(y/n), what do you have behind your back” he sternly said, you sighed and defeated him and showed him what was behind your back. A white rabbit, with droopy ears greeted him. Riddle stood there in shock and you sitting there embarrassed. 

“(y/n) you know your not suppose to have a pet here, its-”

“Yeah yeah it’s against school rules to have a pet on campus, b-but please don’t tell the Principal” You stuttered. Riddle leaned back thinking about it, but gave a big sigh. 

“I understand what it’s like sneaking a pet, well not really, I take care of the hedgehogs and most of the time I have to hide to take care of them. As I don’t want my dorm to see me like that” Riddle explained, he leaned over to take a closer look at your bunny, giving your bunny a small pat on the head. 

“As much as I hate people who break the rules I can let this one slide as your dorm may have different rules then mine” Riddle sighed. 

“So you're not going to report me?” you held your bunny to your chest

“I won’t if you give me a kiss” Riddle smirked, your face going red but nodded giving him a kiss on the cheek. 

You brought your bunny to your living room and you let Riddle hold your bunny as you grabbed some tea and snacks

Leona smelled another scent on you other than his, he knew you two haven’t seen each other in a while because of winter break but this scent is new. You notice how protective Leona was since you two came back from winter break, you tried to ask him but he completely ignored you. 

“Leona whats wrong, you’ve been so protective” You tried to catch up to him after class but he just kept walking. He walked all the way to your dorm and walked in your dorm. You caught up and found him looking around the house sniffing. 

“Leona whats wrong?” You huffed trying to catch your breath. 

“Someone else was here, other than your annoying friends” Leona growled and kept looking around. 

“What are you even talking about? I had no one come over during the break” you responded trying to catch up with him again as he walked towards your room. He slammed the door open smelling the scent strongest here. He continued to look around your room until he saw a sheet covering a box. What’s this? The scent is strongest here. You finally found him in your room looking at the sheet. 

“Wait don’t take the sheet off!” You huffed trying to push him away, sadly he was stronger than you and reached down and grabbed the sheet. Yanking the sheet away revealed a cage with a hamster in it. Leona arched his eyebrow and looked at you. You were horrified, scared of what's going to happen next. Leona leaned down to examine your hamster.

“What is this (y/n)” Leona pointed to your hamster

“U-uhhh it’s my hamster, his name is (a/n)” you shuffled your feet, “I-i know we’re not suppose to have animals here but I really miss (a/n) so i brought him here” 

“So this was the scent I smelled” Leona mumbled, rubbing the back of his neck. 

“Did you think it was someone else?” You asked grabbing your hamster out of his cage, leona didn’t answer you as he continued to mumble to himself. You brought over your hamster you brought him up to his face 

“D-do you want to say hi?” You asked leaning over to see his reaction. 

“No I don’t want to say hi to your damn hamster” Leona's face scrunched up. 

“Are you jealous of (a/n)?” You asked, leaning close to his face. Leona took this moment to steal a quick kiss from you. 

“Why would I be jealous of a little hamster?” 

Azul was in Sam’s shop looking at an item he was thinking of purchasing. 

“Oh hey Azul!” you said walking into Sam’s shop. 

Azul turned to face you with a small smile plastered on his face. 

“Hello my dear how are you?” Giving you a quick kiss on your hand, you smiled as you accepted the affectionate action. 

“I’m doing okay, what are you doing here?” You asked as you took his side and looked for a certain item. 

“Ah, I'm looking for a certain item that is needed for a school assignment” Azul said, placing one of the items down. 

You went over and picked up a bag of grass, grass? Why would you need grass? Azul interest peaked. 

“(y/n) my dear why do you need a bag full of grass?” Azul asked. You tried to explain yourself but it seems like you were dodging the answer the best you can. You quickly bought the grass, gave your lover a quick kiss and said your goodbyes. Now that made you look even more suspicious, azul tried to think why you need it. 

Later on you came to visit Azul in the mostro lounge, the idea of you buying grass still lingered in his head. So when you popped up and immediately trapped you in his office and made you sit down on the couch. 

“My dear (y/n) it’s been on my mind for quite some time, what are you hiding?” Azul leaned forward, your faces very close to each other. You tried to lean back to get some room but it pretty much failed as your back hit the chair.

“I-i don’t know what you're talking about” You stuttered. 

“You know you can tell me anything, I can keep many secrets” Azul kept pressuring on, you finally snapped and just silently muttered to yourself. 

“You’ll need to speak up darling” 

“I have a pet bunny…” you mumbled. Azul got up letting the information sink it. 

“A pet bunny?”

You just nodded.

“Can I see it?” 

So there you two where, your bunny on your lap and azul sitting on your bed 

“What’s your bunny’s name?” He asked. 

“(a/n)”

“(a/n), that’s a nice name, you do know it’s against the rules to have any pets here right?” 

You just meekly nodded. Azul just sighed and ruffled your hair.

“As long as Principal doesn’t find out I’m fine with it,” Azul said, giving you a quick kiss.

Kalim hasn’t seen you in a while and wanted to talk to you. He asked Jamil if he knew where you were and he mentioned something about seeing you heading back to your dorm. So that’s where Kalim went! He burst into your room only to be greeted by a tiny ferret. 

A Ferret? What is a ferret doing in (y/n) dorm? The Ferret got scared and ran off.

“H-hey wait up!” Kalim chased the ferret around your dorm and your ferret made Kalim chase them for a whole 10 minutes. You quickly scooped up your ferret in your arms as Kalim came around the corner. 

“Aha! You were finally caught, little fella. You think you can get away from me?!” Kalim smiled petting the little ferret's head. He looked up meeting your eyes, his face lit up even more and glomped you with a hug.

“(y/n) there you are, I was looking for you!” Kalim smiled crushing you and your ferret. 

“Is this ferret yours?” Kalima asked letting go of you, You looked at your little ferret and gave them a little pat on the head and looked back at Kalim.

“Please don’t tell the Principal” You asked, Kalim sat there for a second confused on what you meant by ‘don’t tell the principal’.

“What do you mean (y/n)? I have like 53 peacocks!” Kalim laughed, making you feel a little bit uneasy. 

You three went to your lounge and chill there for a while. Kalim would pick up your ferret and play with it. 

“Hey (y/n)! What’s this little fella’s name?” Kalim asked, picking up the ferret and petting his little head. 

“(a/n)” 

“(a/n)! What a great name! Does (y/n) spoil you?” Kalim smiled and placed them in his arms.

“AH don’t worry I’ll spoil you!”

Vil knew what your dorm was like, he has visited it some many times, but how did he never notice the fish bowl sitting on the window sill in the kitchen? Maybe he thought it was a vase, no no he knows what a vase looks like. Pomefiore has hundreds of vases, he knows what various vases look like. 

You were out of the house to pick something up from Sam’s, so you left Vil by himself in your dorm. He became hungry and walked to your kitchen to see if you have something healthy he can eat. 

You feel like you forgot to do something, you got your item from sam right? Check, you got that but what did you forget? Then it hit you, you forgot to put away your betta fish. You quickly rushed home to see Vil staring down your betta fish. 

“Vil i know what it looks like, but-” 

“My darling potato, you know you're not supposed to have any pets” Vil said, turning to face you. You were trying to catch your breath as you ran most of the way. Vil frowned seeing all of the sweat on your face. He grabbed a handkerchief from his pocket and handed it to you. 

“I know, but I really liked Betta fishes and thought maybe I could keep it a secret.” You said wiping your sweat off your face. Vil face frowned and as he watches you try to convince him that your betta fish is nice and doesn’t cause any problems. 

All Vil did was sigh, give you a quick kiss on the forehead 

“As long as you don’t give your fish more love than me, then I’m fine”

Idia came over wanting to play a new video game that just came out, you already had everything set up with snacks! Now here you two were playing the new video game in your room eating all the delicious snacks you brought. 

During a cutscene you told him you had to take care of something, and that you’d be back real quickly. He just nodded, what peaked his interests was when he heard you shuffling around the room. Moving stuff out of the way and grabbing a box covered with a sheet. Idia paused the game and turned to see what you were doing. When you pulled away the sheet there revealed a cage. A cage? Why would (y/n) have a cage? 

“Hey (a/n) sorry for the loud noises, here have a little treat.” You said grabbing a bag beside you place, a bag of berries and placed it inside the cage. 

“(y/n) what are you doing?” Idia called out scaring you. You jumped and quickly turned around. 

“O-oh nothing, don't worry about it.” You stuttered scrambling to put the sheet over the cage. That just peaked Idia’s curiosity, but not wanting to pressure you into showing him what it was he just nodded and turned back to video game. 

The cage still lingered in the back of his head as both of you continued to play the video game. It was getting late and you were getting sleepy, and you fell asleep on your bed while Idia was still playing the game. 

Once he noticed that you fell asleep he paused the game and quietly got off the bed without waking you up. He walked over to the box with a sheet over it. He was a little scared of what it's going to be. 

He quickly pulled off the sheet and revealed the cage. It looked like there was nothing inside until he saw a tiny house. He bent over and looked inside seeing a little ball with spikes. He quickly pulled back scared on what he just saw. The ball unravels revealing a tiny hedgehog sleeping in the little house. Idia sighed in relief as it wasn’t something like an urchin. But an urchin can’t live above water so he doesn't know what he saw. Luckily it was just a cute hedgehog. 

So this is what (y/n) was hiding, ah okay I understand i’ll keep this secret as well is what idia thought as he put the sheet back on the cage and went back to playing the video games.

Malleus was waiting for you at your normal waiting spot, pretty much outside your dorm. You were 30 minutes late and Malleus was getting worried. Did you get hurt? Did you forget about the meeting? He teleported to your door and knocked three times with no responses. He grabbed the handle and the door flung open revealing you with a dishevel look plastered on your face. 

“(y/n) what is the matter, you look like a mess” He asked, letting himself in as you just looked around the lounge again. Then both of you saw it, a little mouse running past the hallway.

“(a/n), get back here!” You screamed out and ran after the mouse. 

(a/n)? Who’s (a/n)? Malleus just followed you, chasing a little mouse. Is this what children of men do? Run after mice? 

You tried to swoop the mouse off the floor but missed and the mouse ran off again. You huffed and puffed from running around the dorm

“Are you trying to catch that mouse (y/n)?” Malleus asked, you just faced him and gave him a quick nod. Malleus thought about it for a while then grabbed his magic pen. Wave it around a bit and boom there’s your little mouse in Malleus hands. 

“Do you want me to get rid of it (y/n)?” Malleus asked, you quickly yelled out no surprising Malleus and scaring your mouse. You quickly grabbed your mouse and put him in his little ball that was laying on the living room. 

“Why did you put it in a ball?” Malleus asked walking into the living room behind you. 

“It’s so (a/n) can roam around the dorm and I’d be able to spot her” You smiled. Then you realize what you just said. You admitted to having a pet in your dorm, to a dorm leader or another dorm, and someone who has a lot of power. 

“P-please don’t tell anyone! I really love (a/n) I don’t want to get rid of her!” You pleaded, which caught Malleus off guard again. 

Malleus just gave a small smile and planted a tender kiss on your temple. 

“I won’t promise” 

Would you like to order something? Look at our Tea shop rules first!

[untraceable-ace]

Thoughts on “In case I make It” as I listen:

Gonna be a long one folks, I’ll put it under the cut

Tomcat Disposables: Tomcat Disposables my beloved you make me cry every time “What’s the moon made of?/Meet me there after I’m gone” SOBBING

Becoming the Lastnames: The piano gives me the same vibes as the piano in the Camp Here and There full songs (like MBYT and Venetian Blind Man) I love it

Cicada Days: Tied w Tomcat Disposables as my favorite single, literally so in love, forever happy that the intro is just kinda white noise mimicking cicadas and not actual cicada buzzing my spd is happy “and then my sponsor said do nothing, nothing works/and then my doctor said dont do that if it hurts” feels like a weighted blanket directly on my chest it’s wonderful

Euthanasia: Instrumental intro reminds me of a Days n Daze song; main verse melody is literally so haunting I love it

Falling Up: WOAH that felt like a curveball after Euthanasia oh DAMN the chorus slaps the acoustic makes the song feel really like, full bodied? Oh god after the falling up lyric it temporarily becomes a country song I’m not sure how I feel about that I just kinda had the mental image of a dude falling up the stairs the whole time during the chorus and tbh it’s a good one to have

That’s Enough, Let’s Get You Home.:  Oooh, I have a feeling I’m gonna love stim singing to this one once I get a chance to listen to it a lot more; OH I KNOW WHAT THIS REMINDS ME OF it reminds me of Cecily Smith from Fly By Night!!!

Um, it’s Kind of a Lot: I’d been thinking this one might have some sampling from Everything is a Lot (the song, not the album), but from what I’ve heard, there’s not any sampling from the song, but I think the piano parts are inspired by the album? Or at least it feels that way The piano def reminds me of the album piano vibes. Damn, Mr Wood has an obsession w tourniquets oh SHIT bridge/breakdown hits HARD hell yeah. Also, first appearance of brass so far on the album I think?

Half-Decade Hangover: omg guys he said the name of the song that’s the name of the song!!!/j OH SHIT SELF-ish REFERENCE This feels like something you’d hear at a bar w a piano on the stage for people to go up and play on

Vampire Reference in a Minor Key: Same thought process as Um, it’s Kind of a Lot; the title got me thinkin “o shit vampire culture reference?” But again I think I was wrong; Guitar do be bangin tho OOH he just did like a lil riff that reminded me of 6up 5Oh I wanna do a tango in a tight fitting red dress to this song

You Liked This (Okay, Computer!): it’s.....it says things??? Uhhh good commentary on society ig?? LMAO its not a song sorry yall

The Main Character: JAZZY AS FUCK WOAH I already wanna dance to this I think this might be my favorite song from the album “So god forbid I’m seen as an average human being” fuck man r you coming for me or what

Against the Kitchen Floor: FUNKNY ASS BASSLINE OH DAMN this one is literally so fun? I wanna swing dance w someone to this LMAO the end spoken bit I love when songs do that

Sex, Drugs, and Rock ‘n’ Roll: I feel like I’d listen to this one when I’m sad, feels like a good one to listen to when I’m crying

Big Fat Bitchie’s Blueberry Pie, Christmas Tree, and Recreational Jell-o Emporium a.k.a. “Mr. Boy is on the Roof Again” (Feat. Pasta by Sneakers McSqueakers) [From the Motion Picture ”B.F.B.’s B-Sides: Bagel Batches, Marshmallows, and Barsh-mallows]: LMAO we’ve made a brief return to 30-word long song titles for this one fellas okay wait what the fuck is this LMAO wait okay okay vibing vibing 48 seconds of song for a 34 word long song title lets mcfucking go LMAO

Willard!: Feels like the main character’s power ballad in a musical; Wow yeah actually this is like- SUPER musical theater vibes damn oooh and I love the piano version of the Tomcat Disposables melody at the end

White Noise: The vocal melody on the chorus is muah muah chefs kiss This was a really good one to be the closer tbh AND OH OH the build up to the second chorus?? GOD that goes hard

Don’t worry everyone I’m sure I’ll be shitposting about at least one of the new songs later this week when I get a chance to hyperfixate on one or two

[renaxwrites]

well... if requests are open... can we throw it back to some naked tik tok headcanons with asahi, bokuto and iwaizumi? 👀

Naked Tiktok

- (Asahi, Bokuto, Iwaizumi)

a/n: HAHA it’s so fun to imagine what their reactions would be like!! Hope you enjoy <3

Asahi:

You’ve been constantly seeing that new naked tiktok trend, and with your bf being the innocent teddy bear he is, you wanted to see how he would react

But you decided to wait until the next time you were at one of your homes

The time came when he was exhausted after practice, so you walked him home

Him playing wholesome bf asked you to sleep over. He’s not gonna let his girl go home in the dark no sir

He decided to shower first, then it was your turn ;)

You showered pretty fast, eager to get this tiktok rolling

You came out quietly, and peeked around to find him preparing the bed. He’s so intensely focused on how you would want your sheets he doesn’t even noticed you strutted in, cheeks and all

“It’s okay babe, I can do that myself!”

He looks up and instantly gasps, beet red as he turns around and cowers

“Y/n! I’m so sorry! Let me leave so you can have privacy, I don’t want to invade your space! Oh my god I can’t believe I just-”

You keep on the innocent act, “but babe I don’t have any pjs 🥺”

He keeps his eyes closed as he fumbles around for an extra shirt, then waddles over and gives it to you.

You laugh and take the shirt, putting it on to calm him down. “It was only for a tiktok! I’m sorry babe I didn’t mean to startle you :( ”

He peeks through his fingers and breathes a sigh of relief. “That’s okay. It wasn’t bad, I was just caught off guard”

You: what wasn’t bad?

Him: uh 👀 well 👀

The rest of the sleepover went well ;)

Bokuto:

We all know this mf has mood swings 24/7, and they’re easy to maneuver

However, they’re sometimes unpredictable. So instead of planning it, you decided to go with the flow for this trend

Bokuto had just come home from a night out with the Gym 3 fellas. He was animatedly filling you in on the events of the night, not missing a detail

Before long, it was time for you todo your night routine, so the two of you started doing your own thing

During this time, you decide to film it now, with he was on a “feel-good” high

Quickly, you only rinse off, for the sake of victimizing your bf, getting your phone set on recording

You walk in, cheeks and all, to find him talking on the phone with the guys, as if it was the most natural thing in the world.

You throw in a bit of sass with a hand on uncovered hip. “So talking to guys you just saw is better than coming to bed with me? Guess I’ll be sleeping cold and alone tonight :( ”

Bokuto turns around

Him: :O

He instantly starts fumbling around, and with a quick “gottagonowbye”, hangs up on his friends, ignoring their questioning

He mocks your actions and also puts his hand on his hip

“Well what kind of guy would I be if I let my queen be all cold and alone? I can fix that!”

He playfully scoops you up and softly tackles you to the mattress

The next day your tiktok went viral. Pretty sure his friends didn’t need to ask what happened after he hung up ;)

Iwaizumi:

Over the course of the relationship, you and Iwa have fell into a routine, much to your comfort. It was stable and loving, and you couldn’t be happier

But there were times when one of you would throw the other a curveball, to keep things lively

Today you had heard Oikawa gush to the team about the “naked tiktok challenge”, and how he would react if someone ever did that to him

Of course, your boyfriend didn’t hesitate to shut him down, but it did give you the urge to want to pull the trick on Iwa yourself

You bide your time until the night, when the two of you had freshened up and wet ready for bed

You were in the middle of moisturizing when you notice how peaceful he looked while rewatching game plays on his phone

Time to strike >:)

You walk back into the bathroom and unwrap your towel, phone in one hand and lotion in the other

You strut back out, and as if it was the most normal thing in the world:

“Baby, can you get my back? I can’t reach a certain spot :(”

GASP

He was such in a state of surprise that he threw his phone up, and it almost hit the ceiling

I wasn’t face went scarlet, and he turned around and covered his eyes in one hand, and fixed his bottoms with the other

You: “Babe! Are you okay? What’s wrong?”

Iwa: “uhhh nothing uhhh...you look as stunning as usual babe...”

He seemed, through his constant fidgeting, as if the blood in his face/brain went to his other head

His response: “I can get your back no problem love...can you just...fix something for me”

You: “Sure! What is it”

Him: “come here rq 👀”

You fixed it for him all right ;)

P.S. your vid went viral, with Oikawa never letting him hear the end of it

[lakemojave]

Land of Falling Sun 8

There was no hiding Dog. Chipper had to keep circling up above as before, as it was the best way for them to blend in with the surrounding area with a proper vantage point on the situation. The wanderer scurried to a nearby building--the post office, he later discovered--and crouched below a shattered window. The approaching intruder would probably check the sheriff’s office first, since it was the site of the most carnage. Dog stood outside a different building down the street.

Then they waited. All three of them waited.

What the hell was that back there? How in the hell had he done that? He still wasn’t confident that he was actually, truly dead, and was now living through some bizarre dream-like transition to the afterlife. He’d sooner believe the bullet was a dud or something, but that didn’t explain the sensations he felt at that moment. The knife wasn’t inherently magical, he knew that. His magic was--well he didn’t really understand it, did he? Starting fires, summoning horses, calling dust devils or plagues of insects, those all made sense to him somehow. He always considered himself a summoner, someone who created things--no, that wasn’t right. He didn’t create Dog, Dog clearly came from somewhere else he didn’t know. Maybe the fire did too.

Silence outside. All three of them waited.

What happened outside wasn’t like that. It wasn’t calling anything forth to his aide, it was splitting a bullet in half. What kind of magic is that? How do you even begin to figure that out? Talk about what splitting a bullet in half symbolizes? What it represents metaphysically? Isn’t that insane? Maybe it is, but the wanderer realized that’s probably what he was gonna have to do.

He listened for footsteps, but the breeze outside was too loud. All three of them waited.

Splitting a bullet in half. Separating a missile into two distinct parts. Destroying it--no, that’s not right. Something split is not the same as something destroyed. The bullet still existed, only in two halves. So it was converted into something else, like matter changing states. But the bullet was still a bullet until it hit the deck behind him, when the halves were reduced to shrapnel. Their properties were no different than they were before making contact with the knife. So what was so damn magical about all of this?

He heard footsteps outside.

-----

Dog stood motionless down the road. Chipper craned their head down to listen to what took place below. The wanderer peeked up from his window. The first thing they heard was a voice:

“Hooooooooowee! We done missed the party huh!” It was high, cheery, and jovial, trailing in a high country drawl. It was a skeleton wearing a tattered shirt and a straw hat. He carried a hobo stick and pouch over his shoulder, and wore a gun belt with two pistols, both serviceable looking enough. The wanderer was a little insulted looking at him--like he was looking at a parody of himself. Chipper was a little relieved, as his demeanor seemed pleasant and friendly rather than hostile. Dog wanted to gnaw on him.

He jangled around the fallen members of the centaur gang, examining their weapons and checking for valuables. He started talking to himself.

“What I say, Mr. Mercy? What oh what did I say? You got to stop gettin’ yourself into this. You gotta find a nice, comfortable hole, and let this all go. But NOOOO you just HAD to go adventurin’ didn’t ya? Ya had to go a-wanderin’ under the clear blue sky and see whatcha see. And whaddya have to show for it? A buncha dead fellas at the crossroads of nothin’ to see and nowhere at all! Oof! This one got cooked crispy huh! Wonder if that woulda happened to that last fella? Nah, those guys are pros. Ain’t gonna scorch themselves with their own lightning. Just gonna get blowed down in the street! Hee hee...remember that guy what tried to teach ya manipulations and such? Then got his head chewed off by a roamin’ cactus? What good that done him huh? Guess I got one up on all these fellas to begin with. Hold up...that ain’t a bullet hole right? Nah...but how them lil’ boys growin’ out then?”

“Shut. Up.”

While he was talking, the wanderer managed to sneak out from his cover with relative ease. As the skeleton--whose name he presumed to be Mr. Mercy--approached the deck where the wanderer lay moments ago, he snuck up behind the skeleton and drew his knife to the back of his neck. There was a soft clink as he drew it against the bone. The wanderer turned back and whistled his companions closer.

“They with you?” the wanderer asked, regarding the five dead. He figured he knew the answer already, but it didn’t hurt to keep him on his toes.

“N-now sir, we can jus’-”

“Answer. The question.”

“No! Nope! Never seen ‘em!”

“What are you doing here?”

“Lookin’ around! These ghost towns got good scrap usually!”

Chipper descended upon the sheriff’s office and perched on a handrail. The rattled Mr. Mercy was clearly even more stunned by the oncoming bird person.

“Hey kid,” the wanderer said to Chipper, “What do you think of this guy?”

They craned their body forward, and Mr. Mercy’s head turned ninety degrees to meet them. Chipper looked young, soft, and simultaneously youthfully naïve yet knowing and intuitive. Mr. Mercy, despite his skullish featurelessness, seemed harmless. Capable of handling himself of course, but ultimately harmless.

“Seems alright. Seems kinda friendly actually,” they said with the utmost seriousness and posture.

“If I let you go,” the wanderer said, “You won’t do anything stupid?”

Mr. Mercy chuckled nervously. “Now sir, yer askin’ a lotta me.”

Chipper stifled a giggle. The wanderer sighed defeatedly. “Will you promise not to reach for your guns?”

“Yes! I don’t wanna hurt y’all,” the skeleton spouted.

The wanderer relaxed his grip on the knife, and withdrew it from Mr. Mercy’s neck. “Be warned,” he said, “This thing cut a bullet in half about an hour ago.”

“Nice bluff sir,” Dog said, approaching the deck. “Keep him around. Maybe he can explain your own magic to you.”

The wanderer shot his horse a death glare, then turned back to Mr. Mercy. “So. Who are you anyway?”

The skeleton shrugged. “Just a guy, I s’pose. Makin’ the best of bein’ stuck here, same as anybody. Cig?” he pulled a stained pack of cigarettes from his pocket and held it out.

“Stuck here?”

Mr. Mercy was taken aback by this, and withdrew his hand slightly. “Yer uhh...not from here?”

The wanderer and Chipper exchanged a look. “Why?” Chipper asked, “Where is here?”

“Hooo boy,” Mr. Mercy said, “That’s a big ‘un.” He extended the cigarettes to the two of them. The wanderer took one, and lit it in his fingers. Chipper declined. “Y’all do yer business here, then uhhh...I’ll tell ya whatcha got in store.” He started off the deck, and found the wanderer’s coat. “This anybody’s? Looks my size.”

The wanderer and Chipper looked at Mr. Mercy with stupid awe. Neither knew what to make of this man, other than that he seemed friendly and like he meant well. He was also extremely annoying, and judging by how Dog looked at him, either Dog would tear him to bits and gnaw at his marrow, or Mr. Mercy would put two quick rounds in its head and kill it.

The wanderer took a drag at his cigarette, and pointed to the jacket. “Yours now. Fits you better anyway.”

[inkribbon796]

It’s Not Rabies, It’s . . . Ch. 2

Summary: With yet another demon on the loose in Egoton, King gets a lucky break when Dark finds them first.

A/N: This was a suggestion-request from the anon Nightfall on AO3. Which resulted in this story and since this one was getting a bit long it inspired a bit for the Visitation Day on Sunday which will be a lot less angsty.

Chapters: 1, 2, 3

Chapter 2: Airing Out Grievances

Lunky was following a specific trail now, the densest aura trail in all of Egoton: the Entity’s.

Fortunately for the entire city Dark was having an early morning. He’d been woken up early by the Host. The seer had warned him that he should be on the lookout for something coming to attack him. So he was braced in his warehouse.

Green noticed something first. His scans picked up something but he couldn’t see it. So Dark came to his location and saw that there was a new aura trail in the center of his territory. It was a new demon.

At first he was furious, the audacity of this vile creature! When Dark found them he would show them no—

Why was Kay’s aura here?

Anger turned to trepidation. At first he thought — was afraid— that Kay had been violently attacked because his aura was all over the place, meshed in a weird way with a new demon aura. He almost attacked it outright before realizing it was an infantile demon, and Kay aura wasn’t on it because it had attacked the young man. Kay’s aura was a part of this demon. Just like Wil’s aura existed inside all of his children’s aura.

In fact there was still a minute trace of Wil’s aura in the mix.

This was Kay’s child!

Dark felt a myriad of emotions. Confusion about how this had happened. When it had happened? Fear for the fact that this spawnling was wandering around a town crawling with demon hunters. And—

The Entity’s racing thoughts were cut off when the spawnling bit down on his aura.

“Hey!” Dark shouted, pinning the spawnling down.

Or at least he tried to. The spawnling had seen Dark teleport in and lunged out to bite his aura. But because Lunky wasn’t three-dimensional, Dark’s hands contacted with nothing. He had to use his aura to do it.

And no sooner did Dark’s aura come into contact with Lunky, did something in Dark recoil. Not because Lunky could do any real damage to him or was repugnant in some way.

But Dark aura naturally stuck to things. Kay would know Dark had been in contact with his child. And Dark couldn’t get his aura on the spawnling . . . he knew how furious that would make Kay.

The young man wanted nothing to do with him, hadn’t for years. Surely this would just be another part of Kay’s life Dark was not allowed to touch.

The Entity’s blue soul was already screaming in frustration and fury. Dark had to get the spawnling back to Kay before his blue soul threw another fit. Those were never fun to manage.

So with a quick spell Dark trapped Lunky into a small area without having to use his aura. He was trying to think of something. He couldn’t just leave the spawnling to their own devices, they were too new, too juvenile to survive in this city on their own.

Fortunately for Dark Illinois came running out and after a sharp order from Dark, Illinois grabbed a piece of printer paper and they trapped the enraged, screaming demon onto the paper.

Illinois cheered in triumph, chuckling, “So this is the new demon in town that everyone’s freaking out about? Seems harmless to me.”

“No, this is Kay’s spawnling,” Dark corrected. “I don’t think this one’s existed long enough. They don’t even have their own independent aura yet.”

“Wait, his what?” Illinois shouted in shock. “How did— When did Kay have a kid?”

“Less than a week ago,” Dark said, looking at the spawnling for a bit.

“Did he tell you he was having a kid?” Illinois demanded, wounded. “He didn’t tell me.”

“No,” Dark told him.

“Why wouldn’t he tell us? Is he seeing someone? There is some partner out there we need to threaten.” Illinois became more resolute by the second.

Dark tried to keep his face emotionless, ordering his red soul to keep her brother from acting out. A slow realization dawning on Dark: Wil’s children were even less human than he suspected. “Demons don’t need a partner to have a spawnling. Kay could have had this child with no outside help if the conditions were right.”

“Oh,” Illinois managed. Then his head started to spin and turn with the implications of that. “What would having other people’s aura in the mix do? Would that work or make something new?”

“Providing the aura was in significant amounts, I would think it would make something new, why?” Dark asked.

Illinois went beet red, “Uhhh, I . . . uh.”

Thankfully Illinois was saved when King came around the warehouses. He was in a warm jacket and gloves, slipping a bit on the ice. Yancy hot in his heels and the Host following at a bit slower pace.

“Hey Kay,” Illinois smiled, holding up the paper. “Lose something?”

King looked relieved when he saw that very familiar image. “You guys did find them.”

Illinois’s smile got more devious, “What happened to being responsible and adult, huh? Maybe you should have worn a condom when you let the forces of nature fuck you over?”

“Hey!” King dove in to take Lunky back. “Don’t teach them those words yet!”

“They got a name?” Illinois asked.

“Lunky,” King said, uncertain. “That’s what the Host told me anyway. They respond to it, which is good because they don’t know how to communicate with me yet.”

Illinois snickered, “Lunky, what kind of name is that?”

“Shut up, it’s their name,” King defended heatedly. “Your name is Illinois, we could stand here and make fun of each other’s names all day.”

Illinois held up his hands in surrender, “Fine, fine.”

Dark had internally balked at the name, but he kept quiet. Whatever the spawnling’s name was, wasn’t really any of his business. Or it shouldn’t have been.

“Is the little fella okay?” Yancy asked concern, before smiling sweetly at the spawnling. “Youse gave us the run around all o’er town, didn’t youse?”[1]

Lunky let out a chittering hiss that Yancy didn’t know how to understand.

“Uhh, Squirrel Whisperer, youse got a word ‘a that?”[2] Yancy asked.

“Yancy should allow the Host to help,” the Host offered, walking forward.

“Sure, why’s[3] the hell not?” Yancy shrugged.

The Host took the paper and with a couple words shook the paper and what appeared to be a human child shot out. King lunged to catch the child, they were heavier than he expected. They looked like an almost exact copy of King when he was about three-years-old. And they were screaming and hissing in rage.

“And voila,” the Host announced, making sure a little bit of his aura extended out so that Lunky could start nibbling at it, calming the spawnling down. “The Host has solved their problem now that Lunky is three dimensional.”

“This solves nothing,” King reminded him. “I have a kid. I haven’t got anything for them. Don’t people usually have like nine months to prepare for one of these?”

“Hey youse[4] got me,” Yancy smiled.

King managed a smile, and a nervous chuckle, “This kid is doomed, you know that though, right?”

“Hey, I’d be a great uncle,” Yancy defended heatedly.

“I know, that’s not what I meant,” King smiled.

While the three adults were talking the spawnling was looking at Dark, and the Entity was staring back at him. The two demons weren’t breaking eye contact; the contact wasn’t hostile, it just wasn’t breaking.

Dark tried to memorize the spawnling’s image, hoping that the next time he saw Kay’s child he would still recognize the aura. His blue soul’s screams were echoing off the inside of his skull, trying to claw his way to Kay’s child. But Dark had made sure that his echo stayed very close by.

King quickly noticed that Dark was staring at Lunky. He felt very defensive. When his and Dark’s eyes met that snapped something inside the animal magnet.

“We need to talk,” King told Dark, the Entity’s eyes slowly rising to meet his son’s eyes.

“Very well,” the Entity sounded disinterested.

“Is there a way we can have this “discussion” without screaming in front of the kid?” King asked the Host sharply.

“Yes the Host, Yancy, and Illinois can take King’s child for a bit,” the Host allowed. “The Entity and the King of the Squirrels should take their discussion inside.”

The Host’s eyes bled a bit and suddenly King and Dark were in Dark’s office, standing on either side of the Entity’s desk.

King finally hit the end of a long fuse that had been burning for a very long time.

“You were elated when you saw them, weren’t you?” King tried to keep his tone civil. “I’m a demon just like the rest of you.”

“Don’t be absurd, I didn’t feel anything,” Dark denied.

That just got King angrier. “I was always too human for you, your little white sheep you couldn’t get to do what you wanted.”

“Why would what you were matter to me?” Dark dismissed. “I didn’t bring you into the Manor to make a demon out of you. I did it because Bim needed siblings. I didn’t have any expectations for any of you except to stay alive.”

The last moment Dark had seen Arthur lingering haunting in his mind. A child he had failed to care for.

“I won’t involve myself,” Dark told King, eager to have the discussion over with. It would take forever to calm his blue soul down. Then he added when he saw the slight confusion on King’s face, “with . . . with Lunky. Besides it’s obvious that you don’t want me in either of your lives.”

“Why wouldn’t I let you near Lunky?” King demanded, angry but not furious enough to not catch what Dark was actually saying. “You’re his grandfather.”

That word punched right through all of Dark’s mental and emotional walls. He had to leave! He should have made himself scarce when Kaylor arrived. But he was too greedy and eager to see the boy again.

“Wil is his grandfather,” Dark bit back, stepping to the side of his desk and throwing open a portal. “Should you need anything, you know where I am.”

“Where do you think you’re going?” King demanded, his anger stoked again. “You always run off when I try to have a real conversation.”

“What else is there to talk about?” Dark demanded, his own frustration getting the better of him. He needed to leave. “You hate me, you don’t want me anywhere near you or your child. There is little to negotiate on the matter. I’ll tell Wil about them, unless you wish to do that yourself, and stay out of the way.”

It’s not fair! It’s not fair! He’s mine! It’s not fair! His blue soul was frantic and furious.

We need to leave! His red soul was no less desperate to be heard but pulling him in the opposite direction.

I know! What do you think I’m trying to do? And Dark was stuck somewhere in the middle of the two of them.

“I don’t hate you,” King snapped in frustration. “You always fucking make this about you. Do I think you’re an egotistical narcissist who would sooner kill himself than be a decent person? Hell yes. But I don’t hate you. I don’t regret being adopted by you, and I know the others don’t regret it either.”

“Don’t patronize me, Kaylor,” Dark scoffed, his tone was calm but the fact that his aura was pitching up and down betrayed the fact that he was furious. “I know the Host still needs me to cooperate with his plans. I’m not going to go back on that. You were always the smart one between all your siblings, you always knew what I was and you left the first chance you got.”

Then Dark felt it, his blue soul trying to shatter off a bit so he could reach out for Kay. Not to hurt him, never to hurt the boy. It had been years since Dark had set his hand on King and his blue soul wanted to hold the boy again and Dark snapped, grabbing his blue aura and slamming him back against the wall behind him.

While King couldn’t see anything he saw Dark’s shadowy aura lash out at something a couple feet in front of him and objects on the far wall rattle a bit when something hit the wall. He instinctively jumped.

I said no! Dark reminded his blue soul.

Dark was quick to subsume Damien’s blue soul back in. Something his soul did kicking and screaming, Dark couldn’t silence all the splintering and echoes, but when it was over Dark turned to King, “Ignore him, he’s been out of sorts all day.”

“What was that?” King asked, his anger cooled significantly.

“Nothing you need to worry about, I have it under control,” Dark told him.

“No, no,” King insisted. “We’re talking about this, were you about to attack me?”

“Don’t be absurd, if I haven’t attacked you even as a threat in almost twenty years I’m not going to start now. Sometimes my aura gets a bit presumptuous and I have to put it back in its place.”

“So what was it going to do?” King demanded.

That clearly got Dark defensive. “Why do you care? It wasn’t going to hurt or attack you?”

“I care because it concerns me,” King told him. “Why is it so bad that you can’t tell me?”

Dark considered just leaving. This wasn’t Kay’s problem, it was his. And he couldn’t just . . . he wasn’t allowed to . . .

With a deep exhale, Dark gave himself another second or two. Then his left hand had more of his light blue aura than his red and he reached out for King’s closest hand. He had his hand in a very loose half-hold where only the pads of his fingers were touching him, giving King more than enough opportunity to take his hand away.

King didn’t take his hand away, watching Dark in confusion a bit before he felt overcome by an emotion. It beckoned a memory in King’s mind, when Dark would hold the young man back when he was still a child. Whenever Kay was spooked or had woken up from a nap . . . but the feeling was reversed. The feeling of warm body heat against his skin and someone who needed him in that moment.

Kay felt his cheeks grow wet and Dark pulled his hand away, no longer looking King in the eye.

“There,” Dark said. “Like I said, I have it under control. I know you don’t like it when you’re touched without permission.”

“You asshole, you were going to hug me,” King told Dark and flew forward to wrap his arms around his chest.

Dark stiffened up completely. His red soul became less frantic and Dark was left alone to fight against his blue soul from returning the touch. But there was no one else to distract either of them and Kay was so warm.

Slowly, as if cautious — afraid — that Kay would push him away, Dark began to move his arms down until they were gently wrapped around King.

The young man’s embrace became a little tighter, a sad chuckle coming from his mouth, “See, you just should have asked.”

His chuckle turned into a sad laugh, “Our whole family is fucked up if neither of us knew you wanted a hug.”

“I didn’t—” Dark started to deny but was cut off. His blue soul was finally silenced, suddenly calm again. Even his red soul felt like she was in a better mood.

Sooner than Dark or his blue soul wanted, Kay slowly began to pull away, and Dark could feel Damien was getting unhappy again but there was little they could do. Kay was done indulging their momentary lapse of control and Dark swore to himself that it would not happen again.

“I’m not going to keep Lunky from seeing you, if I’ve got anything to say on the matter they won’t be joining the network, but I don’t want them not to know who you are.”

“If that’s what you want, they are your child,” Dark tried to act as chill and nonchalant as he always did, desperately trying to regain his composure.

“I meant what I said earlier,” King told him. “Both about not hating you and you being an egotistical narcissist. Both those things are true.”

“Anyways,” Dark ignored the barb. “We should find the Host.”

“Already done,” Yancy was standing at the door with the Host and Illinois. Lunky was in the ex-prisoner’s arms. None of which had been there a couple seconds ago.

Lunky was hissing at them but froze when he saw Dark. They began making some odd sounds as they reached out for Dark, clearly frustrated they couldn’t normally stretch.

King walked over and took Lunky, “Hey buddy, you okay.”

“They’s been cryin’ the whole time fer youse,”[5] Yancy told him. “Set ‘a[6] pipes on this kid.”

Lunky, the second they were placed in King’s arms calmed down for a second or two, before reaching for Dark.

“Oh is that how it is?” King chuckled, and walked back over to Dark. “You want Gramps, huh.”

“I’m going to get my aura all over him,” Dark tried to warn.

“I don’t see a problem with that,” King shrugged. “Unless you don’t want to hold him?”

“No, I can hold him,” Dark allowed, hesitantly taking the spawnling into his arms.

The instant Dark had them in his arms his aura instinctively latched on and the spawnling started just devouring his aura again, their eyes little more than round black circles.

Dark just let his aura wash over the kid, placing clear warning markers that despite not being his direct spawnling, Lunky was his and other demons and mages better not touch them.

“할아버지”[7] King told Lunky, having them look up at Dark. “That’s gonna be one of the first ones we learn, right?”

Dark rolled his eyes, but just soaked in the fact that he got to hold the spawnling. They stayed in the office for a bit until Lunky let themself be passed back to King and Dark opened up a portal right in front the heroes’ base.

It took a long, lengthy discussion to explain how King round up with what looked like a three-year-old but the heroes accepted Lunky into their group. Mini peeked around Bing, cautious as the two children looked at each other.

Before Dark could vanish off without Lunky realizing he was leaving, Silver walked over to him.

“Demon grandkid, huh?” Silver asked with a smile.

“You and your heroes allow the hunters to even come within sight of them, I will murder all of you,” Dark warned.

“Got it, got it,” Silver promised. “We’ll make sure they stay fed and everything.”

“Will you now?” Dark chuckled dryly. “You don’t even know what they eat.”

“It’s not another cannibal is it?” Silver groaned seriously.

“Don’t let them taste human flesh and we’ll see,” Dark suggested. “That’s how Bim started out. I took my eyes off him for five seconds and he started licking dead bodies.”

“You’re joking right?” Silver deadpanned.

Dark flashed him a sadistic smile and walked through a portal.

“Dark! Dark!” Silver called after him. “You’re joking right?”

With Dark gone all the heroes took their new edition inside and King proclaimed that the next time he saw either of the Jims he was going to stab them in return for stabbing him in the heart. Then he went to go and take Lunky to his park to show them what would become the spawnling’s second home.

~~~~~~~~~~~

Accessibility Translations

1. You gave us the run around all over town, didn’t you?

2. Uhh, Squirrel Whisperer, you got a word of that?

3. why

4. you

5. They’ve been crying for you the whole time

6. of

7. “Grandfather”; Korean. Specifically the informal way to address your paternal grandfather. Phonically read as halabeoji.

[itsafanficthing]

My Sassenach - Chapter Four - A Movie

I was trying to post once a month for My Sassenach, but then I did’t have a whole lot to post.... so here you go friends.

The long await, much hated, date with Frank Randall.

A03 Link

Damn it, Jamie could kiss. As soon as his lips had touched her own, Claire was lost in him. He pulled her closer and her breath left her in a huff as their chests collided. Gathered into his arms as she was, she felt safe, secure, protected and oh so very turned on.

Large hands running up and down her back before landing on her arse.

“Christ,” Jamie breathed before he continued to kiss down her neck and back to her mouth.

“Christ was right,” Claire thought as his mouth found hers again. He had no right being this much of a good kisser.

Claire had briefly worried at dinner that they may be venturing too far into “friend” territory rather than dating territory. They got along famously, but there had been limited physical contact. Their flirting over the board game had cleared up some of that concern, but it was the way that Jamie was kissing her that definitely confirmed that they were no longer friends. This was something more. Something deeper. And Claire was about to go on a date with someone else.

Claire eventually left Jamie’s. Clothes in tact, hair thoroughly messed and panting with swollen lips. Her Uber driver has given her a smug knowing look which Claire promptly ignored before giving the directions to her apartment.

Jamie was right when he said that he would give her a kiss as something to remember him and now she couldn’t wait for the next date. She just had to get through her date with Frank Randall first.

—

“Ye dinna have to go on this date, ye ken,” Jamie stated as he leaned against his door frame.

“It’s just one date,” Claire reasoned.

“Aye, but what if ye really hit it off?” Jamie looked down at the floor, his voice somewhat gravelly.

“Are you worried?” Claire asked in surprise, taking a step closer to Jamie again trying to make him look up at her.

Jamie grunted in annoyance before answering, “Wouldn’t ye, if it were me?”

“I was,” Claire answered truthfully, “before I knew it was sister, of course. But yes I was worried. I was worried that…”

“What?” Jamie asked hopefully looking up at her.

“At the risk of laying all my cards on the table,” Claire said with a huff, “I was worried that I was reading more into… us,” she continued, indicating between them, “then what was there.”

“And do ye still feel like that?” Jamie’s voice lowered as his hands rested on her hips.

“Not so much now, no.”

“Good,” Jamie nodded confidently. “Because ye aren’t. It’s there.”

“Good.” Claire repeated the word before pausing for a moment. “I am still going on this date though.”

“Why?” Jamie groaned, “I can already tell ye how it’s going to go.”

“Oh? And how’s that?” Claire asked with a smirk.

“Ye’re seeing a film?” Jamie clarified as Claire nodded at him. “Well first he’ll compliment ye, because ye look bonnie. Ye always look bonnie.” Claire blushed at the compliment as Jamie continued, brushing an errant curl behind her ear.

“Then ye’ll get some snacks, popcorn maybe. He’ll ask ye about yer work-“

“He already knows what I do. It’s in my bio,” Claire tried to interrupt as Jamie continued.

“And ye’ll reply, probably downplayin’ what ye actually do. Ye’ll ask him about his work. Ye’ll wait in line together for yer film, what are ye seein’ by the way? It does’na matter. Ye’ll wait in line, awkwardly standing next to each other. Then ye’ll sit in yer seats and ye willna be able to hold a conversation so all ye ken about this fella is his job and maybe what he does on the weekend. Ye’ll both spend the movie not really payin’ attention. He’ll be thinking about taking yer hand in his and ye…”

“What will I be thinking about?” Claire asked, cocking her eyebrow at his explanation.

“Well Sassenach, ye’ll be wondering why ye went on this date when ye ken that I’ll be waiting to hear from ye. Ye’ll be thinking about how I dinna like ye going out with some other lad. Ye’ll be thinking about how much better yer night would have been if it were me with ye.” Jamie brushed her cheek softly with the pad of his thumb and she fought the urge to shudder at the contact.

“Confident are you?” Claire tried to ask in jest but it came out much airyer than she’d anticipated. There was something about the way that Jamie was standing with her. The way that he touched her so gently. The way that he looked at her- It turned her legs to jelly.

“Nah,” Jamie chuckled shaking his head. “I’m no’. But I ken what I’ll be thinkin’ about.”

“Oh?”

“You,” Jamie said clearly. “I’ll be counting down the hours till our next date.”

Claire felt her cheeks heat up and she shook her head.

“You know you’re well within your rights to also go on a date with someone else,” she pointed out.

“I dinna want to date anyone else, Claire,” Jamie said with a somewhat exasperated sigh. “So when ye’ve had yer date, let me know so that we can start dating, just the two of us.”

It was then that he had kissed her goodbye and Claire had rethought her plan to leave and her plan to go on a date with another man.

“Goodnight Jamie.”

“Goodnight Claire.”

It was with Jamie’s kiss lingering on her lips that 18 hours later she was getting ready for her date with Frank Randall.

Claire was at a crossroads. She didn’t particularly want to be going on this date, but she also didn’t want to stand him up. She’d lost a lot of sleep after leaving Jamie’s apartment wondering if she should cancel the date after all. It wasn’t like she was expecting it to go anywhere. It didn’t make sense for her to go on a date with another man when she had Jamie waiting (not so) patiently for her.

She didn’t like cancelling plans. She felt like she would be letting him down somehow. She’d never even met the man and she already felt like she was failing him. Not a great start.

Claire’s job meant that she ended up cancelling plans far more often than she liked. She was a perfectionist in all areas of her life and while logically Claire knew that cancelling a date wouldn’t be the end of the world and Mr Frank Randall would more than likely find another woman on the dating app, she couldn’t shake the feeling that she had to follow through on her agreement to meet him.

So, there she was: standing in her underwear looking at her closet- trying to decide how to dress.

She didn’t want to go over the top and give him hope that there might be a second date or that she had put in a lot of effort trying to impress him. But she didn’t exactly want to go in house clothes and look like she’d put in no effort at all.

Claire huffed a sound of frustration as she picked up her phone and sent a text to Geillis. She always knew what to wear on these types of things, not to mention, Claire hadn’t even told her about this other date.

“Going on a movie date. What do I wear?”

Claire threw her phone back on the bed and looked helplessly back to her closet.

Jeans were casual… maybe she could wear black ones- they seemed to be more dressy over her normal blue ones. Claire pulled a pair from the hangar and threw them onto the bed just as her phone buzzed.

“With the red headed lad? Didn’t you see him last night?”

Claire read Geillis’ reply chewing on her thumbnail.

Rolling her eyes at her own hesitation to tell her best friend about the other date Claire replied, trying not to overthink it.

“Yes, but this is a different guy. We’re going to a movie.”

It felt like Claire had only just pressed the send button when the phone was vibrating in her hands, Geillis’ face smiling back at her.

“Another lad?” Her friend asked immediately, not waiting for Claire to greet her. “What happened to red-heid?”

“I told you, I saw Jamie last night,” Claire replied weerily.

“But ye did’na tell me that ye were goin’ on a date with another lad. What happened?” Geillis demanded.

“Nothing happened,” Claire sighed, “I’d just planned another date and it’s tonight, and I don’t know what to wear.”

“Somethin’ must have happened,” Geillis mumbled more to herself than to Claire. “Who’s this other lad yer goin’ out with then?”

“Does it matter? I just need to know what to wear.”

“Aye, it matters. I thought ye liked Jamie,” Geillis argued.

“I do like him.”

“Then why are ye seeing this other lad?”

“I just told you.” Claire’s eyes were running over her closet trying to find something to go with her black jeans.

“Ye planned another date,” Geillis repeated Claire’s words skeptically.

“That’s right,” Claire answered sternly, “now help me decide what to wear.”

“Is this because ye dinna like cancelling plans?” Geillis asked, ignoring Claire’s request to move on.

“Are you going to help me or just microanalyse my life choices?”

“Both,” Geillis replied confidently, earning a snort of laughter from Claire. “What have ye got picked out?”

“So far? Black jeans,” Claire answered in relief that Geillis was finally moving on.

“Good choice. What top?”

“Well that’s where I’m stuck,” Claire said with a sigh as she ran her fingers over her clothes, hoping that something would jump out at her.

“What about that green top. Ye ken, the one we bought when we were in London at Christmas?” Geillis suggested and Claire pulled it from the hangar.

“Maybe,” Claire hummed as she looked at it paired with the jeans.

“What kind of message are ye trying to send?” Geillis interrupted Claire’s assessment of the clothing.

“Uhhh.”

“Jesus,” Geillis breathed in exasperation as Claire’s non-answer. “What message were ye trying to send yer wee fox on yer first date?”

“I… I don’t know. I was trying to be more like myself and less like “Date Claire”, as you put it.”

“And who are ye trying to be tonight?”

“Myself I suppose. More casual than the date with Jamie. This is just a movie.”

“Just a movie, aye?”

“What?” Claire asked hearing the skepticism in Geillis’s voice.

“Ye dinna sound keen about the date. What does it matter what ye wear?”

“Because I want to look nice.”

“But ye dinna want to be putting in too much effort,” Geillis continued Claire’s thought. “I see. Go with the green top. It’s casual enough for a movie but ye are’na over doin’ it.”

“Shoes?”

“Does’na matter. Ye can wear heels if ye want, maybe yer white tennis shoes. Ye’ll be more comfortable,” Geillis suggested and although Claire couldn’t see her, she was sure that she had shrugged.

“Alright.” Claire nodded looking at the clothes laid out on her bed.

“Do not straighten yer hair,” Geillis said suddenly. “Ye always straighten it on dates. Let it go free.”

“Date Claire?”

“Aye, Date Claire straightens her hair. Don’t straighten it.”

“Noted,” Claire laughed. “I should get ready. Thanks for your help.”

“Nay bother. Send me a pic when yer ready and let me know when your done. I want to hear how it goes.”

“I will.”

“I also want to ken what’s happening with yer wee fox, mind.” Geillis reminded her.

“I know. I’m working tomorrow, evening shift.”

“Aye, same. Remember. Pictures and debrief,” Geillis said again.

“Yes, yes I know. Bye Geillis.”

“If ye get lucky, text me immediately.”

“Goodbye Geillis,” Claire said firmly while laughing and hanging up the phone.

—-

Claire was late. Claire was never late. Never in her life. She left early for most appointments to arrive with time to spare. She arrived to work half an hour early to each shift, just in case. But right now- she was late. She had excuses; the Uber hadn’t arrived and then the roadworks on the way to the theatre had held her up longer than she had been expecting, the Uber driver had passed the theatre twice while looking for somewhere to pull over. Then she dropped her bag while exiting the car and had to stop to pick everything up.

Claire’s heart was beating heavily in her chest with anxiety as she tried to control her breathing. She could feel herself sweating and was praying that her cheeks weren’t flushed with embarrassment.

Claire took a deep breath as her phone buzzed in her pocket. She was already late- stopping and reading a message wasn’t going to make a difference.

“Good luck on your date. Can’t wait to hear all about it.” A message from Jamie. Claire rolled her eyes at the message and was about to reply when a voice nervously called her name.

“Claire?”

Claire looked up to see her date standing shyly in front of her.

“Frank,” she greeted pocketing her phone and mentally reminding herself to reply to Jamie later. “Sorry I’m late. I was just about to message you.” She was lying but he didn’t need to know that.

“Not at all. You look lovely by the way.” Frank smiled kindly at her.

“Thank you.”

This was arguably the most awkward part of any date; how to properly greet each other. Shake hands, kiss on the cheek, awkwardly do nothing. Frank took the lead and quickly swooped forward placing a chaste kiss on her cheek, his hand briefly clasping her upper arm. Claire had to force herself to stand still and accept the greeting, rather than jump backwards away from him.

It was a normal greeting, one that she should have expected- it was a date after all, but it still surprised her.

He was clean shaven, unlike Jamie who had a small rasp of stubble on his strong jaw. Christ. She shouldn’t be comparing Frank to Jamie. They were two completely different men… Frank was older than Jamie, by a good few years. Light brown hair, very styled, gel or hairspray perhaps- brushed out of his eyes, unlike Jamie, whose hair was longer and hung messily in his eyes. Franks had soft brown eyes with laugh lines- a good sign that he was willing to live a little.

“Well, should we err, get to it?” It took Claire a moment to realise that it was Frank talking to her, and she wondered if that’s how she sounded to everyone else in Scotland.

Frank was English. Very English.

While Claire’s accent had morphed over the years (spending time in different countries had a tendency to do that to a person), Frank’s accent was clean and crisp. It was almost laughable to Claire. He sounded… well pompous. Claire could just imagine what Jamie or Geillis would say about him should they ever meet. Which they never would. Claire shut that thought down quickly.

“Claire?” Frank asked again, clearly concerned that she had some kind of handicap as she stood assessing him on the street.

“Sorry, yes of course. My mind was on other things.”

Frank held out the crook of his arm in a very old fashioned gentlemanly way, which Claire promptly ignored and strode on ahead of him into the theatre.

—

“Did you have an idea of what you wanted to see?” Claire asked looking up at the board of flashing lights advertising the available movies and times.

When Frank didn’t answer she turned to find him unabashedly staring at her. God, did she have something on her face, or in her hair? She knew she should have straightened it.

“Frank,” she called his name to get his attention, feeling stupid. Geillis was right. Frank was such an old man's name.

“Sorry,” he immediately apologised taking a step forward to be next to her and look at the movie times. “This is going to sound very cheesy but you do look very nice. I suppose I was distracted.”

Claire smiled tightly at him. She was sure that it was meant as a compliment, Jamie had done and said things to the same effect after all, but she didn’t feel as warm inside when it came from Frank. It felt a bit… what was the word… predatory. Claire shook her head. She was casting some very wide judgements on a man that she knew nothing about.

“So, the movie? Any idea?” She asked, directing the conversation to something neutral and ignoring his “compliment”.

“Oh, whatever you like, dear,” Frank replied as he squinted to read the illuminated words.

Dear. He called her Dear. On the first date. Oh no. No, that was not going to work at all.

Though, Jamie did call her Sassenach. So it wasn’t that pet names were necessarily a bad thing. It was that Frank called her a name that was specifically reserved for grandparents and people that had been married for forty years. Not people you had just met for a first date.

Though, if Jamie’s pet name was anything to go by, the English version… well Frank may as well have called her “bitch”. Claire snorted a laugh at the thought of Frank greeting her like that, as prim and proper as he was.

“Something I’m missing?” Frank asked with a grin on his face waiting to be let in on the joke.

“Oh no, it’s nothing,” Claire answered feeling her cheeks flush.

Frank arched an eyebrow at her and she almost felt like she was getting in trouble for not telling him.

“It’s just… a friend of mine… is Scottish, he calls me “Sass-en-ack”, (damn it, it sounded horrible when she didn’t have Jamie’s liquid accent) “and I was just thinking that the equivalent of that in English might as well be “bitch” and the thought of you calling me bitch… well, it just made me laugh.”

The amused smile was fixed on Franks face. Definitely fake. He nodded once as if he understood the joke (though clearly he didn’t at all) before turning back to the movie board.

“Yes well, I wouldn’t imagine that would be the best way to greet you. A friend of yours, you said? That’s not particularly respectful. I would never do such a thing.”

“Oh no-” Claire tried to explain, “no he doesn’t mean it like that. It’s just. I’m English and the Scottish don’t particularly love the English and it’s in jest, it’s not a rude thing.”

“Yes I’ve noticed,” Frank hummed as a few teenagers passed them cackling loudly at something their friend was saying.

“No it’s not that… it’s… never mind. It was a brief funny thought that I’d had,” Claire shook her head. She shouldn’t have tried to explain it. Jamie would have laughed. Claire made a mental note to tell him about it. “So, the film?”

“Perhaps “Mary Queen of Scots?” Frank suggested looking away from the board to the ticketing line.

“Why not, when in Rome… or Scotland I suppose.”

Frank did laugh at that and Claire fought the urge to roll her eyes. It wasn’t even that funny.

—

Waiting in line was almost exactly as Jamie had described.

Frank asked Claire about her work and she told him about nursing. She asked him about his job and he launched into a detailed description that Claire boiled down to one word. “Historian”.

“So then you’ll be able to judge the inaccuracies of the film.”

“Oh I believe so. Not exactly the year of my personal expertise, but I have done some reading on it of course.”

“Of course, as did I,” Claire replied (somewhat sarcastically pompously).

“Really?” Frank sounded thrilled.

“Yes, I believe it was grade ten history… or perhaps eleventh year.”

“Oh, so not recently then?” Frank sounded immediately crestfallen.

“Oh no, that was only… two years ago?” Claire answered pretending to be thoughtful. “I failed that class a lot.”

There was a brief pause between them as Frank studied her and Claire stared straight ahead waiting for her joke to land.

“Your joking,” he finally said, somewhat amused.

“I am absolutely joking,” Claire answered in relief as Frank began to laugh. “Though I have to say I am offended at how long it took you to figure that out.”

“You said it so seriously,” Fank defended still chuckling.

“That’s called sarcasm, Frank.” At least he did know how it laugh… eventually.

“Lowest form of humour, people say,” he said nudging her playfully.

“And yet the most popular.” Claire grinned as the pre-pubescent usher scanned their tickets.

—-

The movie was good. Worthy of an Oscar, Claire thought.

“Loaded with factual inaccuracies, if you ask me,” Frank said as they exited the theatre.

Claire hadn’t.

“I quite liked it. There needs to be some licence for creativity.”

“Oh of course, of course,” Frank immediately conceded. “I was merely pointing out, well Mary and Elizabeth never actually met in real life. And the scene of John Knox arguing about Mary taking another husband. The timeline is off, it would have been treason to say such a thing.”

“I don’t think that anyone watching the film would have known that,” Claire reasoned.

“I knew that,” Frank said proudly.

“Yes but you’re a historian, aren’t you? I didn’t know that, even with my very impressive and relevant eleventh year history knowledge.”

Frank chuckled lightly at Claire comment and shook his head. “No, I suppose not.”

They continued their way out of the theatre, moving slowly with the other patrons until they were standing awkwardly on the footpath where they had first met.

“Well, shall we go get a coffee or something?” Frank suggested as he smiled at Claire.

She hesitated. Before meeting Jamie Claire would have said yes in an instant. Frank was respectful, understood some of her jokes, he complimented her and he was clearly very intelligent. But there was no… spark, there was no zing. Unlike with Jamie whom she had hit it off immediately, even if she had been a bumbling embarrassing idiot.

“It’s just a cup of coffee,” Frank said reading her hesitation. “We’ve hardly spoken. I would like to get to know you.”

Claire smiled at him before nodding. It was one cup of coffee. How bad could it be?

He held his arm out to her and she ignored it once again. They weren’t there yet “dear”.

—

Despite how the earlier date had gone and the judgements that Claire had made about Frank, she actually had a good time with him. Once he had relaxed and stopped trying to impress her, he was actually quite funny. He was clearly very intelligent, an academic, but she didn’t feel like he was talking down to her. He was very passionate about his job and very obviously loved what he did.

He was currently completing research into the highland clans of the 1640’s and was travelling around Scotland on a research expedition.

He actually reminded Claire a lot of her uncle and she felt the unwelcome sting of grief pick her ribcage as she thought of him.

Lamb was- eccentric was putting it lightly, he was passionate about life, passionate about history, passionate about Claire. When he had the heart attack and was gone not even four hours later, enough time for Claire to get to the hospital and hug him once more before he slipped away, Claire was numb from the shock of it.

Lamb who had always been so full of life, now gray and lifeless on a hospital bed. It was a shock to Claire’s system and it took her a long time to be able to move on with her life. Much faster than her parents deaths, but then she was much, much younger then.

“Claire?” Frank’s voice brought her back to the present. “I’m sorry. I’m talking about this too much. My brother always tells me that I talk about my work too much.”

“You have a brother?” Claire latched back onto the conversation and pushed the memories of her uncle and her parents firmly to the back of her mind.

“Yes, two actually. I’m the middle child.”

“What’s the age difference?” Claire asked. She was always fascinated by sibling dynamics, perhaps it was the result of growing up as an only child of a single parent.

“John is four years older and Alex is six years younger,” Frank answered, smiling at her. Obviously glad that he had her full attention again.

“That’s quite a large gap between you all.”

“Well it certainly made growing up interesting. A house full of boys for my mother. I think she always wanted a girl so she is very soft with Alex.”

“I'm sure she’s soft with all of you,” Claire said with a laugh. “You just don’t see it because it’s you.”

Frank wrinkled his nose as he shook his head, “No, Alex has always been a soft spot for my mother.”

Claire smiled at him. She actually did quite like Frank Randall. Not as much as Jamie of course, but she didn’t actually regret coming out on a date with him as much as she thought that she would.

“What about your father?” Claire asked before she finished the last of her coffee.

“What about him?” Frank’s voice grew sharper, and less warm then when he spoke about his mother.

“Does he dote on your brother as well?”

“I shouldn’t think so, we haven’t seen him since just after Alex was born.”

“Oh, I’m so sorry.” Claire reached out and touched Frank’s hand in sympathy.

Frank shrugged casually. “From what I can remember of him, it doesn’t seem worth having the memory.” Frank turned his hand so now they were… well they weren’t exactly holding hands, but they were touching.

“What about you? Parents? Siblings?” Frank asked as he looked up at Claire. She wanted to move, but it felt awkward to so anything so her hand sat limply in his.

“Orphaned and an only child, I’m afraid. Not much to tell.”

“Oh, Claire. I’m so sorry.” Frank sounded genuinely upset for her and Claire shrugged off his concern.

“My uncle raised me, essentially. So I wasn’t exactly lonely. But I would have loved a sibling.”

“You’re uncle never…?”

“No,” Claire shook her head as memories of her Uncle Lamb washed through her mind.

—

“Uncle Lamb, that lady was staring at your bottom,” a young and hardly innocent seven year old Claire had announced loudly to the entire cafe.

Lamb had shook his head, grinning at his young niece. “Perhaps I sat in something.”

“I don’t think so,” Claire continued, unaware of the peals of suppressed laughter coming from the patrons around them. “Stand up and let me see.”

“I’m sure it’s fine, Claire,” Lamb said kindly as his coffee arrived.

“But if you did sit in something, then we need to wash it in soda to get it out. That’s what Mary’s mum used when she got chocolate on her skirt. That’s what Mary said. She said that her mum used soda. And I said that it would make it all sticky. That it was probably something else. But it wasn’t Uncle Lamb. It WAS soda.”

“Well, I hardly think I am going to take of my pants in this cafe to dunk them in some soda, sweetheart.”

“No, I guess not. But you can borrow my sweater when we leave, and wrap it around your waist if you like. Then more ladies won’t look at your bottom.”

“Thank goodness I have you, little Lamb. Always protecting me.”

Claire smiled sweetly at him before she dug into the muffin and hot chocolate in front of her.

—

“No, he was never really interested in relationships,” Claire said, snapping herself back to the present. “I don’t think he was particularly keen on a family until he was landed with me.”

“How old were you?” Frank asked carefully. He was trying to entwine their fingers together but Claire moved her hands to her empty coffee cup, pretending to warm her hands on the mug. The mug was cold, but Frank didn’t need to know that.

“Six. I don’t have many memories of them. I have photos and videos of course, but it’s not quite the same. Although-” Claire paused as she wondered why she was being so open with Frank about her family history. She hadn’t told Jamie about any of this yet.

“Yes?” Frank encouraged, his hand was still lying on the table between them, waiting to trap her own again. She was sure if she even so much as reached for a napkin, he would seize the opportunity to hold her hand again.

“I don’t have many memories of us together. A few that I think my mind has just created from various hallmark movies, you know every memory that a child wants, Christmas, birthdays, those kinds of things.”

Frank nodded in understanding and Claire continued.

“But I do have these moments, like a certain smell or a sound and I’ll be transported back to when I was a child and it will be my mother’s perfume, or my father's laugh. And then it’s gone, a second later. But for a moment it’s like I can remember everything about them and they haven’t really died and I’m just waiting for them to come and pick me up from school.” Claire’s voice clogged with emotion and she had to clear her throat to continue.

“Anyway, it doesn’t happen all that often. But it’s strange, isn’t it, the things you remember.”

“Yes, yes it is.” Frank’s forehead wrinkled in thought and he was playing with his bottom lip.

“What?” Claire asked with a small smile as he looked back up at her quickly.

“Well, it’s just, you were so young, and I don’t mean to be rude, but it's truly fascinating. How can you be sure that the smell of the perfume is your mothers? Or your father's laugh? How can that be?”

“Oh,” Claire felt herself flush a little under Frank’s gaze and she wasn’t entirely sure why for a moment. She hadn’t really shared those kinds of memories with anyone before. Geillis, perhaps, but that would have been years ago. Her Uncle when he was still alive, she would have told Lamb about it. He might have confirmed it- the perfume perhaps.

Claire couldn’t quite meet Frank’s eyes. She’d shared something deeply personal with him and he was trying to pick apart the only memory she had of her parents. What did it matter that it wasn’t actually her father’s laugh or her mother’s perfume. It was the feeling that was associated with it. The feeling of family- of belonging to something.

And Frank was, what, trying to tell her that those things weren’t real?

“I suppose I don’t know. Maybe it’s buried deep in my subconscious,” Claire answer slowly, calm and measured- trying not to be emotional in front of a man she barely knew. “Maybe it’s the echo of them on earth trying to tell me that the love me? Maybe it’s just me clutching at straws to feel like I still have some connection to my parents. Who knows. Does it matter?”

Claire met his eyes as she spoke and she saw the skepticism pass over him as she spoke.

“They are good memories, why shouldn’t I try to gather what I can, while I can, when I was cheated from having the life with them that I was supposed to?”

“Don’t get me wrong, Claire. I completely agree,” Frank said quickly trying to back-track. “I simply meant that it is fascinating what your mind will retain as a memory and the feeling that you will associated with it, with no idea of its origin.”

Claire ground her back teeth together and nodded quickly. “Yes. Quite.”

It was awkward then. Claire wanted to end the date and Frank clearly wanted to continue. She thought about messaging Geillis with a code to call her and pretend there was some emergency that Claire needed to attend to. But she was an adult wasn’t she? She didn’t think that this date was going to go anywhere and now she had confirmed in in the last four minutes. Jamie would be thrilled.

Claire looked at her watch. They had been chatting in the coffee shop for well over an hour and a half. That was long enough, wasn't it? Counting in the movie, she’d been with the man for over four hours. Christ. How had it taken her four hours to realise he was an idiot?

To be fair, about three of those hours were in a silent movie theatre. Jamie was right. A movie was a terrible first date idea. You couldn’t get to know someone in a movie. And in the last four to five minutes Claire had discovered that there would be no second date or quick coffee catch up (a fact she should have realised the moment she found out that Jamie was having coffee with his sister and not another date).

“I’d like to see you again-” Frank began as Claire opened her mouth to say “I think I’d best be off.”

Claire abruptly closed her mouth and held her tongue.

“It’s not often that you meet such a… a beautiful and intelligent woman on these dating apps. It’s been very refreshing,” Frank continued unaware of Claire’s discomfort. “I’ve met a lot of very attractive women, of course, but none that are so quick, as you are.”

“Are you saying that women can only either be attractive or smart?” Claire asked as her eyes widened in surprise.

“Oh that’s just my experience,” Frank waved away her comment. “But not you, you are both.”

“How kind,” Claire answered flatly. She didn’t take kindly to a compliment that came at the expense of another woman, even a hypothetical woman she didn’t know.

“Yes.” Frank nodded enthusiastically, glad that Claire seemed to be following along with him.

“I should go,” Claire said abruptly, before standing up and tucking in her chair.

“Oh so soon?” Frank rushed to join her and bumped into the table making the mugs and saucers rattle.

“Yes I-” Claire hesitated. She has been about to make some excuse about needing to work early in the morning. In truth she had the next two days off work. She had no real obligations and no real reason to leave except that Frank Randall turned out to be a bit of a jerk.

She couldn’t say that to him, could she?

“Yes,” she repeated. Claire didn’t owe him anything, false explanation or the truth. She could just leave.

“Well, should we schedule our next date?” Frank asked eagerly as he followed her out of the cafe.

Claire called up her Uber app and quickly scheduled a ride. She could pretend she hadn’t heard him and that she was concentrating on her phone. But he would just ask again.

“Erm.” As much as she wanted to be the type of person that told the truth all the time, and was painfully blunt with people, she just wasn’t. She could be at work, but that was work. This was different.

“I am working this week, so much schedule is a little bit hectic. I haven’t received my full roster yet and I may be on call,” She hedged.

“Oh well, shall I just text you then?” Frank asked. He was disappointed. Claire could tell. But she couldn’t find it in herself to care.

“Sure.” Claire felt her phone vibrate in her hand as her Uber approached.

“Well I had a lovely time,” Frank said taking a step towards her. She nearly took a step back if it meant she wouldn’t then be standing in the pathway of oncoming traffic.

“Yes,” Claire answered lamely. She’d had… well it hadn’t been terrible, until the end there.

“May I kiss you goodbye?” He asked softly, looking at her carefully.

God no. Please no.

“This is me,” Claire breathed in relief as a black Mazda pulled up in front of her.

Frank looked even more disappointed as she opened the door. She thought that he might have tried to kiss her, regardless of her giving her permission or not and all she wanted to do was get out of there as quickly as possible.

“It was nice to meet you, Frank,” she said kindly, turning back to him once more. He was much closer than she thought and she was surprised when his lips met hers.

So much for asking.

Claire pulled back suddenly and Frank was smiling at her mischievously.

“I’ve been thinking about that all night,” he said quietly.

Claire was stunned into silence. He’d just gone from being a bit of a jerk to down right creepy.

“Goodbye Frank,” she said harshly before climbing into the car and slamming the door shut.

She fought back a shudder as she unlocked her phone and opened a new message to Jamie.

“You were right. Feel free to rub it in whenever you like.”

And then a moment later.

“Are you free tomorrow? I would like to make good on part of our bet.”