#uglycry

[joyffree]

Redemption, a second chance romance from Laura Lee out now! Pick up this emotional childhood sweetheart romance today!

USA Today Bestselling author, Laura Lee, brings you a standalone story about love, loss, and second chances.

I fell in love with Beckett Armstrong before either one of us knew what that meant.

He was my first kiss. My first love. My entire world.

We promised each other forever, and we meant it wholeheartedly.

But unfortunately, when tragedy struck, love wasn't nearly enough to save us.

Little did we know… it would only get worse from there.

Twelve years later, Beckett and I wear our scars like finely crafted armor.

We've been in survival mode for so long, we've forgotten how to live.

After everything we've endured, can we move beyond the pain to forge a future together?

Or are we destined to repeat the mistakes of our past?

[estellarjj]

Who else cried over the new chapter?

[maryasmorevna]

a few days ago i (re)watched the 25th anniversary concert of les misérables and. oh god. i forgot how much this musical did éponine dirty

[elegyofthemoon]

i need to go back and replay through hidden chapter 5 bc the pseudoconscious liv in a dress made me want to eat shoes thinking about liv who took her sisters dress before she became a medic

[ninbinary]

..years ago (2008?), I had a close friend who passed on, and his spouse had that passage from The Velveteen Rabbit read at the funeral

“too much love” - photo sequence by katja kemnitz

[auditioheros]

discord drop bc i changed my layout

[gunslinginnhogtyin]

Oh no, he's learned a song by Chicago that somehow puts into words exactly how he's feeling...

"If ya leave me now....you'll take away the biggest part of me~ Ooh-ooh-hoo, no, baby, please don't go...~"

"And if ya leave me now, you'll take away the very heart of mee...~ Ooh-ooh-hoo, no, baby please don't go...ooh-ooh-hoo, girl, I just want you to stay...~"

[joyffree]

The ultimate story of loving someone enough to let them go. 

For You, a surprise release by @jodi_ellen_malpas is now LIVE!

Download today on Amazon, Apple Books, Barnes & Noble, and Kobo!  Amazon: https://geni.us/cPAPZrA Apple Books: https://geni.us/znEj Nook : https://geni.us/rjfX Kobo: https://geni.us/nHrD7K Paperback: https://geni.us/9dHM

@valentine_pr_

[sha-biest]

UHM HELLO I’M SOBBING???😭❤❤❤ 

Title: I'll hold your hand, brother.

For @sha-biest, I hope you like it.

The Disaster Twins both lose an arm, so Leo uses his prosthetic, and Donnie uses his ninpo arm to hold hands.

[elegyofthemoon]

people on my twt feed kept comparing pandora hearts and dgrayman and bc my 11 year old self was so obsessed w dgm i decided to pick it up again and 😭 i see why i was obsessed lmao

[erabu-san]

UHRG HUE SOB UGLYCRYING WOAAAHVHUEHUHUE UAAAAGH

[weewoo911]

I’ve seen a few ‘Buck runs into Tommy while Tommy is on a date’ HCs and I love it but also I need it the other way around

Tommy dipping into a restaurant to get some self-pity takeout and he runs into Buck on a date and they make eye contact and both feel absolutely gutted

And Buck didn’t even really want to go on this date but the 118 were being pushy in a loving way so he agreed to it but suddenly the idea of Tommy thinking that he’s moved on is unbearable to him

Tommy kicking himself because he has no right to be upset because he left Buck and this was always going to happen but still he goes home and uglycries into his takeout and he’s in his sweats still with sauce on his chin when there’s a frantic knocking on his door

[l1-b1]

Watched Nimona and uglycried

[charmwasjess]

Sifo-Dyas Wasn’t Supposed to Die: or The Worst Theory Ever 

“All the things you should have stopped, but you didn’t, and nothing will ever be right again. And the things you’ve done,” he whispered. “By the pitiless stars, the things you’ve done…” -Dooku (on Dooku), Yoda: Dark Rendezvous by Sean Stewart

Theory: Dooku killed Sifo-Dyas not because it was planned, but to stop Sidious chucking his former best friend alive into a Jedi-torturing cave to use him as a vision-powered early warning system for his prequel era plots. (A horrible detail not of my own invention, but the exact fate Yoda sees happening to Sifo-Dyas in the Clone Wars episode where he has that Sidious-created vision.)

Anyway, STRAP IN FOR MY WORST IDEA EVER. I hear you. I hear you. Oh Jess, does your Dooku apologist garbage know no limits?! But I’m not giving Dooku a pass here, even if this is a somewhat more palatable version of events than Dooku just killing Sifo-Dyas because Sidious said so, depending on your interpretation of palatable. I realize this sounds like a stretch, but I hope I have convincing-enough evidence to back up my claims and show my work. I really believe that some things which make utterly no sense in the whole Dooku Murders Sifo-Dyas to Take Over the Clone Plot story arc suddenly become actually reasonable, or at least more clear, if you look at it all through the lens of this possibility.

Killing Sifo-Dyas Makes No Sense (for anybody)

Let’s be real: Sifo-Dyas’s murder fucking sucks, and this is even by Dooku’s admittedly poor murder standards. It’s both bad and stupid; you push even lightly on the plan with logic and it falls apart. 

For some reason, instead of killing this important person who could ruin all his plans himself, Dooku hires some criminals he doesn’t even trust (apparently for good reason, as they turn around and keep evidence to blackmail him) to do the job. The logistics of this are further complicated and stupid: Sifo-Dyas isn’t even supposed to be where he ends up getting killed; he’s unexpectedly off on a different side mission from the mission he’s originally on. That would imply that this was something of a crime of opportunity, instead of something Dooku spent a long time meticulously planning - something of a relief, since Dooku would have to be trying to do a worse job at this. There’s even a civilian witness to the attack who, of course, survives. 

Miraculously, the crash does manage to kill Sifo-Dyas (perhaps the only successful part of the whole fucking plot) but then, they move his corpse, so if this is a whole “stage a believable crash death to hide the murder element and buy time for the Clone Wars plot” thing, it’s missing a pretty key component. Then they further fuck that up by forgetting to take his very distinctive lightsaber out of the crash site, definitely linking Sifo-Dyas to whatever happened there. As a cherry on top of this disastrous murder sundae, Dooku then can’t resist Jedi Funeral burning Sifo’s body, in front of a bunch of fucking witnesses no less. He probably uglycried in front of them too, but now this is just my speculation.

But even if the murder was perfectly executed, WHICH IT WASN'T, killing Sifo-Dyas creates a tangible link back to Dooku, from the physical evidence to the established association between the characters - a trail of breadcrumbs Anakin and Obi-Wan are easily able to follow back as is explored in the Clone Wars “Lost One” episode. And Dooku knows better; he used to be a Jedi who helped with Jedi death investigations, as we see in Tales. Killing Sifo-Dyas opens up a whole host of “whys” and extra attention at a time when the Sith need what happened on Kamino to stay very quiet. 

And why murder someone who is already actively working with you? Especially when Sifo-Dyas needs the clones to stay secret too? Dooku seems already to have had everything he needed in terms of access to the Kaminoans, as he’s able to successfully pull off the plan without Sifo-Dyas after his death. He’s also the one with the money, he’s got the connection to Jango; he could have easily gone behind his back. And furthermore, Sifo-Dyas trusted him - seemingly a large narrative reason for bothering to detail their long friendship and history of trying to change vision outcomes. Books like Dooku: Jedi Lost do a lot of work to establish that Sifo-Dyas could have had reason to go to Dooku in good faith and expect him to listen. 

Keeping Sifo-Dyas Alive Makes Sense (for Sidious)

This idea about the Sith Torture cave is not my random invention. Sidious uses a vision of Sifo-Dyas trapped for 12 years in a Jedi-torturing cave to fuck with Yoda – and let’s be real, probably also Dooku, who does not look like he’s having a good time in this episode. In fact, Sidious used Dooku’s blood as a ritual component to CREATE the vision. (There being enough love/bond/connection left in Dooku’s blood to use it to attack Yoda after he’s been a Sith for 12 years is probably another horrible post.) But this seems to establish the alternative cave scenario for Sifo-Dyas as something that both Sidious and Dooku have at least thought about, and are still thinking about, years after his death, and powerfully enough to weave it into a vision.

And can you imagine how interested Sidious is in Sifo-Dyas’s powers, especially if they’re offering spoiler trailers for all of his favorite plans? He is very interested in prophecy, the future, and arguably uses some of those aspects in his manipulation of Anakin. Sifo-Dyas represents both a great threat and a great opportunity to a Sith Lord whose multi-tentacle plans are endlessly convoluted, and by their very nature require multiple contingency plans. How advantageous to have someone around whose one weird power is seeing alternative possible futures?

Keeping Sifo-Dyas alive but captive removes the only other person who knows the exact details about the Clone plot while preserving something potentially very valuable to Sidious. And there’s a further positive: a problem with the whole secret weapon clone army situation is that they need to be revealed at the pivotal moment in the new war. Someone trusted needs to tell the Jedi Council about the Clone Army and convince them to use them in the crisis. Who better to do this than producing beloved, missing Master Sifo-Dyas (who ten years of torture in a Sith cave has made very cooperative and corrupted indeed) to reveal the army to the Republic? 

In Conclusion

But... Sifo-Dyas was his best friend, once, and Dooku chokes. Sentimentality, if not outright lingering love, is a flaw for Dooku as a Sith, and one he trips over repeatedly throughout his atrocities. And we can’t confuse this with actual valor. He doesn’t try to save Sifo-Dyas, only give him a less insanely brutal fate. He orders his death, and it’s a sloppy rush job for all the reasons you might expect from a sudden change of plan, and possibly, the need to kill him before Sidious figured out what he was actually doing. This might even explain him using a third party to do the job: he has plausible deniability to say “well, I ordered them to capture him, but they fucked it up.” Which of course, they did. 

Bonus Round

This theory would also explain two lingering clues we have about Sifo-Dyas’s death involving the behavior of the two guilty participants around the topic:

Dooku

Dooku is really putting the “lie” in “unreliable narrator” during this era, so it can be difficult (and perhaps foolish) to look too deeply into his reactions. But I think it’s fair to say that Dooku acts “pretty fucking weird” about Sifo-Dyas’s death.

In the Lost One episode, he makes an impassioned appeal to Obi-Wan about joining him (a favorite topic of Dooku’s), claiming that Sifo-Dyas understood what he was doing and worked with him willingly. This conversation is only taking place because they caught Dooku in the literal fucking act of covering up evidence of Sifo-Dyas’s murder. It’s not like anyone is unclear about what they’re doing here. Dooku knows. Obi-Wan and Anakin know. Dooku knows that they know. And yet, he still, seemingly genuinely, wants to tell them that Sifo-Dyas sought him out and worked with him. “Join me, just like this guy I ended up murdering” is not a great argument, and Dooku has to know that. So what is the source of his doublethink on this topic? What’s the detail he’s holding onto that’s letting him keep his elaborate palace of denial intact here?

In Tales of the Jedi, Dooku makes an unclear, brief, stammering mention of Sifo-Dyas in the list of the things he’s done for Sidious, and yet killing Yaddle outright is an obvious difficult struggle for him, and narratively shown as a clear before/after moment for Dooku’s fall. The Sith ghost version of Dooku in the Yoda comic outright calls her his first kill. (Lol, Ramil Serenno would like a word.) But you’d think murdering his former best friend who was actively working with him would be a bigger deal? There's this pattern where it almost seems as if Dooku thinks about what happened to Sifo-Dyas differently than his other kills, as if he has some reason to think what he did was less bad or more necessary, even insisting on repeating the absurd “we were working together” narrative when it really has lost relevance in light of how that ended up.

Sidious

Sidious is as onscreen physically violent to Dooku as we ever see him in non-Legends canon in the Lost One Sifo-Dyas episode. He goes into the conversation angry and ends up choking Dooku out over holocomm. If Dooku did, as we assume, exactly what Sidious wanted him to in killing Sifo-Dyas back 10-12 years ago, why does he come into that conversation so violently furious and willing to outright hurt Dooku in a way that he doesn't over other mistakes?

Bonus Bonus Round

In season 5, I suspect the reason we got Sifo-Dyas being tortured in the Sith cave in Yoda’s vision was because Clone Wars was going to make this reveal (and make it so that this was indeed Sifo-Dyas’s fate in the new canon), storyboard or animated part of it, and then decided not to and recycled the images for Yoda’s vision. My pure speculation, but it would fit with their pattern of unused/scrapped/recycled Clone Wars storylines.

*

That’s it! That’s all! You can’t get the time you spent reading this post back, but now this horrible theory lives in your head too. 

[thoughtspresso]

But what if Kana will save Kamiki? (I’m only half joking)

Wouldn’t it just be extremely funny if after the wrap party for The 15-Year Lie, Miki-san just encounters Kana-chan “drinking” (juice) with the intention of killing her at first.

And then Miki-san offers her liquor, and she says, “sorry I may be an adult but I’m still not legal to drink. This is actually just juice.”

And then he tries to seduce her, and she goes, “You look exactly like the boy I like but you’re not him, and I can’t.”

And then she starts to mock-drunkenly uglycry about being abused as a child actress, having to exit the scene when pedophiles started counting down her birthday to 18 and she couldn’t handle images of her body being peddled on social media like that, and how because of her sense of responsibility towards her career, her team, and her fans, she couldn’t realistically be with the only boy she’s ever truly loved. And she keeps talking about how she doesn’t feel she deserves the love of her fans because she’s not as innocent as they think she is and she just wants to do her best in her work.

And then Miki-san just starts crying, like he’s never seen that kind of honesty before, and nobody’s ever understood the way he was also abused as a child actor, or the way his body was used by adults in the industry, or the way his honest and simple love was never reciprocated by the woman he had feelings for and sired children with.

And then Kindaichi just comes into the scene drunk and barking and pulling him by the collar and calling for the guards, and Kana’s like, “Wait, what’s going on!” And Miki-san just goes like, “No, just let it happen, I think I deserve it.”

And then Aqua just rushes in and hugs Kana and is sobbing thinking she could have died. And Kana-chan just going like wtf are you people talking about WE WERE JUST TRAUMABONDING.

LIKE WHAT IF. WHAT IF THE GUY JUST NEEDED ARKHAM ASYLUM.

[warmuse]

when Carla tells 621 during the Ocean Crossing cutscene that she pities them for being Walter's Hound you initially assume that it's because Walter is a heartless slave owner who'd use and discard 621, because of narrative trick that's going on for the 1st playthrough

then you play NG+, NG++... and suddenly realize that she didn't pity 621 for having a bad Handler, Walter is everything but bad to us, but she pitied 621 for being an unknowing pawn for Overseer's cause, HER cause, that would turn them the "monster who burnt the star"

621 would have the entire planet's worth of blood on their hands and she can't reveal the cause to them, she pitied them for becoming a Sinner and be cursed throughout the history, without informed consent nor heartfelt resolution

I need a drink and somewhere to uglycry