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writingtoforgetreality · 4 years ago

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Have Yourself A Merry Little Christmas - Little Movie Star Chapter Seven (Jensen Ackles x Daughter!Reader)

[Actors-Masterlist], [Little Movie Star-Masterlist]

Previous Chapter / Next Chapter (05/08/2021)

Summary: Holidays were around the corner & you were more than a little anxious. How did one celebrate Christmas? You had no money for expensive gifts. Well, that meant you had to improvise. Hopefully, it was enough for them.

Words: 3,526

Warnings: Christmas Chapter in May?, anxiety, language, fluff, cute gift exchange <3

~2016~

That night, Jared left your room after you fell asleep. No matter how many times you begged him not to tell anyone about your panic attack, he could not do that. So as the party slowly died down, he pulled Jensen & Danneel aside & told them what he had witnessed. Obviously, they were concerned about you. Yet, they did not go to you right away. If you were ready to open up to them, you would. Still, they kept a closer eye on you from then on, noticing smaller signs of you struggling with anxiety. Jensen hated that you kept this part of you hidden. But he understood that there was a long way for you to fully trust a person & you simply were not there yet. They had to accept it, whether they liked it or not.

Supernatural had a lot to film before the holidays & Jensen had not really been a consistent part in Vancouver because of him flying back & forth. He felt bad when he told you he had to go back filming until the beginning of December. Brushing him off, you assured him that you guys would be fine alone. Besides, you also had Gen & the kids to entertain you. Over the short time, you had grown close to them. You loved whenever Tom & Shep came by to play with JJ & they wanted you to be a part of it. There were some times when Danneel, Gen & you would have a girls day together. At first, it was a lot for you, but you had grown to love them. At the same time, Danneel & you got to know each other way better, especially with Jensen being back in Vancouver.

Holidays were approaching fast & you had no idea how to deal with it. You had never celebrated Christmas before & were not sure if you should get your new family presents or not. Were they people who valued gifts? Would you receive some? Of course you would, you knew the Ackles’ by now. So you had to think of something. Fast. There was no way you could spend a lot of money on these presents. Not because you did not want to but because it would not be your money. You had saved up a little bit & it would do for small gifts. Then you had an idea.

“Where are you going?” Danneel asked when she saw you putting your shoes on. You coughed shortly, trying to think of an excuse. She knew you did not like going anywhere alone so she was surprised when she found you getting ready.

“Um, just wanna take a walk. I won’t be gone too long.” you promised her & before she could answer, you were out of the door. Danneel was confused by your behavior but she thought it to be positive that you were going outside on your own. Clearly, she had no idea that you were going shopping for Christmas presents.

After buying all the stuff that you needed, you started preparing the presents. You still had over a month left but you wanted to start earlier, just in case. It was not a lot, definitely not expensive, but you hoped they still liked it after unwrapping it. When you realized that you had no idea how to wrap a present, you embarrassingly had to check YouTube for a how-to video. After a few failed attempts & you growing frustrated because you clearly were too dumb to get it done correctly. In the end, you managed to wrap everything. It was by no means good or perfect but you could see what it was supposed to represent.

“How was filming?” you asked Jensen after he came back home.

“It was good. We had a lot of fun, as always.” he answered with a laugh.

“So…can you tell me what happens?” managing your best puppy dog eyes, something Jared had learned you over facetime while they were shooting, Jensen simply shook his head at you.

“Forget it, young lady. You’re a fan of the show, I won’t give away any spoilers, you have to wait like everyone else.”

“You don’t have to wait.” sighing exaggeratingly, you wanted to argue with him.

“Next season you won’t have to.” this made your smile grow wider. He was right, you would start in a few months & you could not wait to receive your first script. “Besides…The guys told me that they can’t wait to finally meet you & work with you.” Jensen looked at you, watching your reacting.

“Fingers crossed they won’t regret casting me.” you joked which made him laugh. He knew you were not serious but the meaning behind your words left an uneasiness in him.

“They won’t, trust me.” he reassured you. Hopefully he was right.

Decorating for Christmas was fun. Even Jared & Gen came over to help you out a little. You all planned to spend Christmas Eve together at your house so you could celebrate Christmas the next morning together as well. This would be the first time you were not entirely alone on this holiday. Hell, you had no idea how to celebrate Christmas in the first place. What were you supposed to do? Maybe you would be just fine if push came to shove.

Two more days until Christmas Eve & you could not help but grow more anxious the closer it got. Your fear of doing anything wrong was so big that you barely had time to enjoy the Christmas spirit. Whatever that was anyway…Knocking on the front door that belonged to the house next to yours, you fiddled with your hands, now feeling stupid for coming over in the middle of the night. They were probably asleep, they would not even hear your attempt of knocking. To your surprise, the door opened only a few seconds later.

“(Y/N)? You alright?” it was Jared, his hair tousled from being asleep. Shit, you did wake him. Great, now you were feeling even worse. Shaking your head, Jared ushered you inside quickly.

“What’s up? It’s…” he looked at his phone to check the time. “3 am.”

“I sneaked out.” you confessed.

“And you did that because..?” Jared was confused. Never before had you shown up at his house in the middle of the night. Whatever was bothering you, it was serious, he could tell. He noticed your trembling hands before you had the chance to answer him. Immediately, he walked you over to his couch to sit down. Making sure to send Jensen a quick text just in case he woke up & could not find you, he put his phone away again, focusing entirely on you.

“I’m sorry.” your voice was quiet & Jared felt his heart breaking.

“Don’t be.” he assured you. “Is there anything you need me to do for you?” he spoke softly, showing you that he was not about to leave you.

“I don’t know, I just…ugh.” throwing your head back in frustration, you were angry at yourself for being so childish. Yet, you did not know what else to do. Jared was the only person who knew a little about what you were struggling with. So you did what you thought was right. Knocking on his door at 3 am. Maybe it was not the best decision you ever made.

“Hey, it’s okay. Deep breaths.” he instructed & you followed through. “There you go. You can talk to me, (Y/N).”

“You’d think it’s stupid.”

“Try me.” his answer got a little laugh out of you. Jared’s eyes grew wider when you did.

“I’m scared of Christmas.” you admitted embarrassingly. When Jared did not say anything, you continued. “This is my first time celebrating & I don’t know what to do or what is appropriate or how you guys usually celebrate it or if you expect something from me or-“ Jared interrupted your rambling.

“Hey, hey, hey. (Y/N). I can assure you that nobody expects anything from you. Except maybe the fact that you are there. That’s all that matters. You being with us to celebrate Christmas together.” Jared’s eyes showed nothing but understanding. Your conversation went on for a little longer & when you wanted to leave his house, he told you to sleep in their guest room for the night. Too tired & exhausted to argue any more with him, you let him lead you to the spare room where you embraced the soft sheets right away. It felt good to open up to someone but you did not understand why you were okay with telling Jared but when it came to Jensen & Danneel, you chickened out.

When you woke up next morning, you got startled for a second, briefly forgetting about last night’s events. What would you tell Jensen & Danneel? Getting up & using the bathroom that was attached to the guest room, you were surprised to find clothes on the counter. Assuming Jared was the one who put them there, a small smile made its way on your face. A quick shower would not be too bad so you hopped inside quickly, letting the warm water soothe your skin. After drying off your body, you put on the clothes Jared had prepared for you. A pair of sweatpants & one of his hoodies. Well, you were not sure if he ever got this one back, if you were honest. You knew your way through the Padalecki’s house by now, due to you spending a lot of time there lately. Paddling through the hallway, you heard distant voices coming from the kitchen area.

“Good morning, (Y/N)! Breakfast is about to be done.” Jared spoke up before you could even see him. What was it with him & his spidey senses?

“Morning, Jared. Sorry again for las-“ coming to a halt right after walking inside the room. Jensen & Danneel were already sitting at the table. Shit, you did not expect that.

“I invited them over for breakfast.” Jared told you. Oh, really? You almost missed that.

“Yeah, I can see that.” chuckling & slowly walking over to a chair, your eyes focused on the floor, too embarrassed to look Jensen & Danneel in the eyes. They were about to yell at you for sneaking out in the middle of the night without telling them anything.

“Am I dreaming or is Jared really making breakfast?” Gen walked into the room & everyone laughed at her comment, even you. Surprisingly, breakfast went by smoothly. Nobody mentioned last night & you were more than thankful for it. But you also knew that Jared most likely talked to Jensen & Danneel about what happened anyway. Who were you kidding, though? They were probably aware of the panic attack you had during the party a while ago. Jared only meant well but still…this entire thing made you extremely uncomfortable. You hated that more & more of yourself got revealed to them & you could not do shit to stop it. Being vulnerable in front of them was awful. Hell, they had more important things to worry about than you & your stupid problems.

“(Y/N)? Can you come here real quick, please?” Jensen asked you after being back in your house again.

“Sure, what’s up?” you were nervous about what he wanted from you but you had to give yourself that. You played it incredibly cool. Like there was nothing wrong at all.

“So for Christmas Eve, we’re doing a movie night, right?” he knew the answer to that question but still decided to ask. After nodding your head, he kept on. “What’s your favorite Christmas movie?” that caught you off guard. He asked you? Why would he ask you?

“Um, I love “Home Alone” but the munchkins shouldn’t watch that.” you concluded. A while ago, whenever you talked about all the kids, you called them munchkins. You found it cute.

“True.” Jensen chuckled.

“I’m sure they’d love “Frozen”, though.” this made Jensen sigh loudly & you laughed at his antics. In all the time you had been with them, you sure as hell had watched that movie about thirty times. No kidding. Really.

“Okay, you know what? We’ll start off with “Frozen” & after the kids are asleep, we’ll watch “Home Alone”, is that alright?”

“Sure, if you guys don’t wanna watch another Christmas movie.”

“Not at all. This one’s perfect.” his smile eased you & you loved the fact that he wanted to include you in their tradition. Yep, Jared definitely told him.

Christmas Eve dinner was delicious & you did not feel anxious at all. Chatting, laughing & enjoying each other’s company was more than enough. Your movie marathon was perfect, too. During “Frozen”, you found yourself singing along to each song, as did the little ones. Well, they tried, at least. Everyone was happy to see you enjoying yourself. When you were like that, nobody could tell that you had a shitty past or that you were still struggling with the consequences of it. This was the first time that Jensen had heard you sing & he was surprised that your voice was actually pretty damn good. Maybe you would sing with him one day, who knew? The kids went to sleep & the five of you watched “Home Alone”, happy that the others were enjoying this movie as well. Before you guys went to bed, too, Jensen, Danneel, Jared & Gen placed a bunch of presents under the big, decorated tree. You wanted to wait to add your presents to the other stacks until everyone was fast asleep. So you sneaked out of your room later that night to do exactly that.

Three kids jumping up & down on your bed woke you from your peaceful slumber. Each of them yelled at you to get up because Santa brought so many presents overnight. Smiling at their excitement, you dragged yourself out of bed & went downstairs. The others were already there. Stopping for a short moment, you took everything in & processed the scene in front of you. This was all so new to you. Everybody had a big smile plastered on their face. Was this what you had missed all these years? JJ took your hand & dragged you over to where the others were already seated.

Presents started being exchanged, kids first, of course. Grabbing three small packages, you walked over to JJ & kneeled down to her. The twins were asleep but you planned on giving them their presents later today. You bought a small, soft blanket for each of them.

“There you go, princess. Merry Christmas.” JJ took her present from you & lost no time in unwrapping it. Her smile widened & she proudly held up the pink magic wand you got her. But there was more to this present.

“I got this when I was your age. Bill gave it to me because I always wanted to be a princess in a huge castle on a hill somewhere. I want you to have it, JJ. Take care of it.” she threw her hands around your neck & you pulled her closer. Danneel had tears in her eyes when she heard your story. Jensen wrapped an arm around her. He, too, was moved by what you told JJ. They did not expect you to give any of them any presents. Yet, you went out of your way.

“Tom? Shep?” their heads perked up when they heard their names being called. You each handed them a package, glad that they were too young to care about how neatly your wrapped them.

“Merry Christmas.” smiling when they started unwrapping their gifts, they let out excited squeals when they saw what you got them. They were the biggest Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles fans. Tom got Leonardo & Michelangelo, Shep held Donatello & Raphael in his small hands. They thanked you again & again until you laughed at them, assuring that it was more than fine.

“Just, don’t argue over them, okay? You gotta share those.” they nodded at you & immediately started playing with the figures. Alright, at least the kids were happy with their gifts.

“Jared? Gen?” you eyed them nervously. “I-I know it’s not much but…Merry Christmas.” you handed them their gift, fiddling with your hands. Jared let Gen open it. A small picture frame revealed itself. You put a picture of the three of you inside. You took it in their backyard, all of you wearing the “Family Has Your Back” hoodie.

“This is more than enough.” Gen started.

“It’s perfect, (Y/N).” Jared finished & waited for you to make a move. If you were the one to initiate a hug, they would not decline. Their smiles got wider when you pulled them into a tight hug.

“Merry Christmas, guys. This is a thank you for everything that you’ve done for me. I don’t know what I did to deserve you..” before you got too emotional, you handed them their package. It was a little bigger & therefore poorly wrapped. “Sorry about the wrapping paper. I suck at that.” you laughed uncomfortably. Danneel only brushed you off, telling you that it was just perfect. They both gasped when they saw what you gave them. You made a painting of the two of them in a pop-art style. Thinking it would fit perfectly in the house & all.

“We need to find the perfect place for it.” Danneel squealed to which Jensen nodded.

“Thank you, angel.” Jensen pulled you into a tight hug, one that Danneel joined a second later. “You have talent.” he added after releasing you. Blushing at his words, you simply thanked him. A while ago, you would have argued, telling him that you were not that good. But you had improved when it came to accepting compliments. The others kept exchanging gifts & you sat by, watching their excitement whenever another present got opened. Slowly, your mood shifted. Maybe you would not receive anything from them? After all, you were still new to the family. That was okay. Did not change you from being sad about it, though. Not wanting to show your disappointment, you kept a smile on your face.

“I believe there is one person left without any presents.” Jensen spoke up & you looked at him with your head tilted. They did not forget about you? There were still two packages left & he grabbed one, Jared took the other.

“Merry Christmas.” all of them said, even the kids joined in. Why were there already tears threatening to spill? Nothing had happened yet.

“That’s not your actual present. But we thought it was the perfect timing to give it to you today.” Jared put one neatly wrapped gift in your lap & when you saw all of them waiting for you expectantly, you went to open it. No way. Was that real?

“Seriously?” you were shocked when you took a closer look at it. “The script for the next Avengers?” they nodded at you.

“Came in a few days ago. I actually wanted to give it to you right away but Danneel had the idea of giving it to you for Christmas.” Jensen explained.

“Thank you! This is…wow.” no words could be formed. You had to read through it later, for sure.

“Here.” Danneel handed you the second gift. “That’s from all of us & from a few others.” sending you a wink, you were left confused. JJ, Tom & Shep sat themselves around you, not wanting to miss anything. Delicately, you unwrapped the present, only for it to reveal a small book. It read “SPN Family” on the cover. There was also a small anti-possession symbol pictured. You were confused but when you asked what it was, they simply told you to have a look at it. Opening the first page, you could not control the tears any longer.

“(Y/N),

this book is filled with letters, pictures & more. Not only will you find our names in there, you will see that almost everyone who’s part of our Supernatural crew has left you a little something behind until you’ll join us on set. Read through it whenever things get tough or whenever you need something to cheer you up. Don’t forget that we’re always here for you, no matter what. You’re family & we care for you.

Merry Christmas, angel”

Jumping up, you ran over & gave each of them a tight hug. You let the tears flow freely, no longer caring about showing your emotions in front of them. The kids dragged you back to the couch, wanting to show you what they contributed to the book. All of them drew a few pictures & you were in awe. That was more than you could have ever imagined.

“Thanks, really. I-I don’t even know what to say.” wiping away your tears, they knew that it was the right decision to get you this present. It almost did not get finished but they managed to get it done in time. And it was freaking worth it.

~to be continued~

Next Chapter (05/08/2021)

Published (05/01/2021) by Cathy

Tags: @vicmc624, @imaginationisgrowth, @stoneyggirl, @alyispunk, @thevelvetseries, @multifandomlover121, @samsgirl93, @supernatural3002, @diabetes-03, @prettyybubblesintheair, @originalsoulcollector, @vir-tual, @bellero, @sergantbuckybarnes, @namelesslosers (let me know if you wanna be tagged <3)

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greenflamedwriter · 3 years ago

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Galra Lance

Lance is a galra, and Ex-Mamourian (He was kicked out because he was suicidal and kept getting attention to try to make Zarkon afraid which was the opposite of what mamoura wanted so Lance is a rebel doing his own thing, bounty hunting stealing, raiding and above all about to steal a red Lion on the ship hailed under Sendak and he’s going to get a boatloud of it. Then a cocky kid in a red suit slashes in claiming it’s his lion. Lance wonders if any of this was even worth it?

1 Flash to mind meld plus suspicion lances memories of him in water with mermaids and pre-galran.

2 Flash to “surprise, not a galra.” Lance is exposed and returned and nervous.

3 His father is Blatyz the previous blue Paladin and his other father the Galra whom Blatyz married. (Wait how were you born?) Pidge asked and Lance grinned his tail flickering back like a cats (I was a test tube baby)

4 Keiths initiation Lance returns to the Mamoura.

5 they take down Zarkon then realise his son appears and find out it was hagger when plot twist the whole family were puppets a chaotic energy anti quintescence gains a form and almost possesed the galra but some (Maourans) Resisted and the galra were so soft, so easily corruptable they fight that thing with Fusiontron. They save Honerva and Lotor and they find a planet and make it habitable and release everyone from enslavment but some planets are merged some want the Galra gone and some need their galra to remain so Allura and Lotor try to fix things. Lance goes to his planet which is hidden and Allura gasps to see Alteans, Mermainians and Galra there in hiding in a warped hole.

On a spacecraft floating on the edge of an arus solar system, an abandoned Galra named Lance, was taking a pit stop.

His ship consisted of junk, the pilot hanger cluttered making even hoarders feel disgusted open drinks and snack bars littered here and there and Lance had to squeeze in just to get to the pilots chair, the craft only had one room and a bathroom that stopped working. And his room was the only place that was clean it had an assortment of guns, rifles, snipers, you name it, along with a discarded blade that has seen no use in years with a strange symbol on the hilt.

Lance had music blasting from his speakers some album he bought from an alien shop, the album was called ‘Queen.’ And so far Lance was a fan.

He was flickering through a data pad as many reports scrolled past with anflick of his finger. Galra operations, cargo shipments, military vessels, open channels with radio chatter that Lance ignored. He was looking for something easy.

The life of a thief had its perks, steal medical supplies and weapons and give them to a rebellion and make a profit. Usually he sold to both sides just to live more dangerously. A recommendation opened up and Lance smirked behind his mask with the three circles on the front.

A vessel captioned by Sendek was hovering outside Arus, sliding the panel right and lots of data began to download at lighting speed , appeared and Lance’s smirk grew.

It had some precious cargo on it, a Lion of Voltron to be exact.

Lance was having the time of his life knocking out guards ninja style was just so easy, he had the red lion in his sights.

“Well hello gorgeous, mind dropping down that barrier and getting out of here?”

Suddenly he heard a nose and hid behind a pillar in the shadows, just as more galra guardsran into the hanger.

Lance turned and frowned to see a boy in red and white armour (like thats not inconspicuous) and took them down, Lance grew more suspicious this kid fought like a galra. But he didn’t wear mamorian armour or any rebel armour that he knew. Could be a threat.

Until the kid went to the barrier “Alright open up.”

…it did nothing, the boy growled in frustration “Ugh-we don’t have time for this! It’s me keith! You’re I AM YOUR PALADIN!”

Lance couldn’t help it he laughed, more like busted a gut.

The kid whipped around activating a weapon, a sword.

“Stay back!” Lance shook his head “No, wait,” he was still chuckling holding up his hands “I’m not-”

Suddenly more guards made themselves known and the two found themselves with their hands full.

Lance wasted no time shooting the Galra, even took care of the kids blindspots, this jlb was bigger than he thought maybe if he helped the kid out they can split the money fifty fifty.

That was until.

“You’re not getting this lion!”

Keith slammed his hand against the panel, and opened up the interlock, the vacum

Shot the galra forward and Keith was barely gripping onto the panel.

Lance cursed then used his grappling hooks to latch onto a structure beam.

Suddenly Keith’s slipped and he was pulled into space.

Lance acted on instinct he unlatched grapplings and shot out of space after the teen. He easily grabbed him stopping them both from slinning.

“Let go!”

“Shut up, I’m trying to save your life.” Until the kid screamed Lance turned in time to see big metal jaws clamp shut around them.

Both screamed as they tumbled along the inner corridors, Lance was usually could at improvising- but this was going so far out of left field!

He had no clue what was even going on anymore.

Both were on their hands and knees panting from the sudden death experience, until Lance heard a high pitched sound and turned his head slowly.

Keith held his red sword against his face. Lance could only stare- oh well, stare in his mask and ex-Mamourian armour as much as he could.

“Who are you?” Keith growled. Lance knew he could knock the kid out and take the lion. But he’d have no idea if it’ll even respond to him, and Keith is a fighter and wouldn’t let this thing go, heck heleaped out of an airlock for this thing.

A crash outside saved his interrogation. “A rebel, against the Galra,” he rushed out (which was sorta true)

“Honestly I would tell you more but we don't have time!”

….It turns out Lance got involved in something much bigger than him.

This...this was Voltron.

His childhood stories, the one his dad told him about. The universe’s last hope before Alfor hid them away.

They returned!

Kinda, with one blue lion shot, it just sat there with it’s barrier up. Useless. Not doing a thing….sounded like his type of girl. Chilling alone while the whole universe wasn’t in chaos.

But even with four lions they were able to take down a fighter craft, one with Sendek attached as it crashed onto the planet before him. Colour Lance impressed.

Keith wasn’t too bad either during the battle. He was an excellent pilot and a fighter, but he had a very bad habit.

“Green is wide open,” Lance said with a sigh as he watched how obvious it was that the green Lion had three fighters on their ass.

“Help them out.” Dumbass, he left unsaid.

Keith seemed to hear it.

“I know-” keith instantly covered them and Lance saw fighter ships approach from the main craft. “Your right-” Keith barely managed to dodge.

“Will you quit back seat driving!?”

Lance almost stopped until he saw the black paladin was in distress “The Black lion-”

Keith was moving before he even finished. Keith was good, just had to see the bigger picture.

Once they defended Arus and went planet side, Lance had already made a decision, as he left the red lion trailing behind Keith he saw the others landed beside them.

A woman appeared out of the castle looking relieved, until her eyes clocked his and Lance almost ran back up the mouth of the lion.

“Who is he?”

Allura demanded once all the pilots had landed.

Lance brightened behind his mask, his lilac tail flicking back and forth as he descended the mouth of the lion and held his hand out.

“Oh hello, I’m Lance.” He over exagirated his movements the more big and dumb he looked the more trusting, Allura took his hand tentively.

“You can’t tell with the mask, but I’m winking.”

Allura pulled her hand away still suspicious. “Keith!”

Keith glanced at him curiously. “He was with the red lion,”

With no warning, Lance felt Allura grab his arm and twist him around onto his knees, Lance yelped.

“Ow, ow ow- that hurts lady- ow!” His hand was trembling and clenching as Allura dug her palm into his shoulder.

“What were your intentions with the red lion?”

“I was planning on stealing it,”

Allura looked very alarmed, until Lance gasped on. “But now? wouldn’t dream of it!” Allura growled “Why should we trust you?”

“My dad told me about Voltron,” Lance wheezed god this lady was tough.

Allura let him go surprised and Lance fell over with a yelp just barely catching himself, he turned and pointed at her with a scowl (That she didn’t see)

“Look I know what this looks like but I know that, this,” he gestured at the lions as he stood up ”This isn’t some collectors item, this is VOLTRON! The people’s hope, if anyone found out I-” Here he slapped a hand to his chest “-was responsible for sabotaging Voltron I’ll be doing the Galra a favour, Which is the opposite of what I want to do.”

Allura and the others who looked defensive, straightened once Lance said his piece.

“Is there anyone out there fighting Zarkon?” She asked, Lance placed a hands on his hips “Still? Jeez Lady where have you been? There is no more fighting, Its just surviving at this point.” He flapped his hand lazily “I already gave up on that freedom pipedream long ago, but yes other rebels are trying. Chances are if you make a dent in Zarkons oppressive system the rebels will come flocking.” And if the Mamoura catched wind of Voltron Lance wanted to be out of there ASAP.

He waved at them taking a step back “Good luck to you,” He patted the barrier of the blue lion and continued to walk away, hoping he could get enough of a signal to his ship to get him as far away from this planet.

Until the barrier collapsed with a swish.

He stopped walking as the others gasped. No.

Lance turned to see the others gape at the lion (Now free) then their gazes turned towards him.

Coran came to himself before the others. “It seems we have found our blue paladin.”

Lance looked around then back at them, wait they meant him?

Oh Gaia, no.

#GL #Galra Lance

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surveys-at-your-service · 3 years ago

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Survey #414

“mirror, mirror, tell me who you see / am i you or me? / i can never remember”

How many people have you kissed? Four. Ever kissed someone you weren’t dating at the time? No. Of the people you’ve kissed, how many do you regret kissing? Two. Ever been kissed by a legal adult when you were a minor (or vise-versa)? Yeah, with Jason, but it was only a two-year difference. Ever kissed someone on a dare/as part of a game? No. Where’s the most public place you’ve ever made out with someone? Nowhere public. I wouldn't do that. Can you snowboard? Never tried. Have you ever made a mixed cd for someone? No. Do you use recycle bins at your house? Yes. Do you own more than one bathing suit? No. Have you ever kissed someone who smokes weed? Jason did occasionally with his best friend, but he stopped for me. How are you right this second? I'm all right. Last night was pretty rough, so I'm just glad that's over. My body is just tired. Is there anything you disliked about your last birthday? Honestly, I barely remember what I did on my last birthday. I just remember it was fine. Oh wait, actually, on the way home from going out to eat, we had to call the cops while behind a car whose driver was obviously drunk or high OFF. HIS. ASS. He was swerving like crazy and almost hit SO many cars. I was having an absolute panic attack. I pray to God that guy was more than just found and fined. Do you keep a diary or journal (offline or online)? No, unless you count surveys, I guess. What were you like a year ago? I was the unhappily the same. Is someone on your mind right now? Fucking always. Having a warm dream about him last night didn't help. Who was the last person you sat next to? My mom. What do you currently hear right now? My screen is split so I can watch John Wolfe play some indie horror games. What’s something you need to go shopping for? I need to get new bras baaaadly because I'm tired of none fitting properly. What’s the last thing you ate? I had a donut 'cuz Mom stopped at Dunkin' for coffee. Do/did you do good in school? I did up to college. Then I just... sucked. Do you always get along with your siblings? I mean I don't see/talk to them every day or anything, not even very regularly even, but we generally get along fine now as adults. We disagree about shit for sure, but keep our mouths shut. Or probably talk to Mom about it while I'm not present. I don't even think they like me half of the time. Are you frustrated with anything? So much. Why did you fall for the last person romantically? There were/are a lot of factors. Just she as a person is phenomenal. What’s your younger sibling’s name? Nicole. Can you speak in a different language conversationally; if so, which language? A tiny bit of German. Do you ever fear of falling asleep? With my nightmares, I used to dread it. Now, thankfully, my APAP mask has prevented them from happening, mostly; I've only had two in the month that I've had it, and I ordinarily had them every single night. Do you have an idea of what kind of profession you’d like to have? I do, but I honestly doubt I'm going to succeed in even making it a part-time job by this damn point. Which beach would you say is your favorite? I don't have a favorite. I don't even like the beach very much. What kind of cookie is your favorite? Chocolate chip. Have you ever had a churro? Yes. Too crunchy and ridiculously sweet, not a fan. Truth be told, are you more into looks or personalities the most? A good personality beats good looks any day. How is/was your chemistry class in high school? I actually didn't take chemistry; my graduating year, physical science was offered as the alternative, which I took. How does alcohol affect you? I get hot, and my face flushes badly. It'll make me more talkative. Have you ever tried lemon brownies? No, and I don't want to. I don't like lemon-flavored stuff like that. What was the last type of meat you ate? Beef. Have you taken any medication today? I have prescriptions I take every day. Have you ever watched Parks and Recreation? I've seen some of it at Sara's house. What is your favourite kind of pasta? Just spaghetti with tomato sauce and meatballs, really. I've been on a major chicken pesto kick lately, though. Have you set an alarm today? No. Think of a random person, and give them a message here, no names: Literally just the chance to say "I'm sorry" would be fucking amazing. Just two fucking words. What if there were two of you? Would the world be in trouble? No. That'd be a waste of space, though. Not like I'm contributing much to society. Would you prefer an ice cream sundae or an ice cream cone? I dunno man, it depends on my mood and what I want in the moment. Do you watch movies with the subtitles on? No; I find it to be distracting. Is the last person you kissed yours? I hate this saying. She's her own person that belongs to nobody but herself. But to just go along with it and answer the question, no, we're not together. Do you think you will be married by the time you are 25? Welp, I'm halfway through 25, so. Do you have siblings over the age of 21? All of my siblings are. Do you have a hard time admitting you’re wrong? No. Especially as I've aged, I'd say I'm pretty quick to accept if I've fucked up. Who has the ability to hurt you the most emotionally? Jason will probably always have that power, even if he's not in my life. Would you ever be a stripper? God no, nobody wants to see that. What are your plans for tomorrow? Just get through the day, man. Do you owe anybody money? No. How would your parents describe you? Reserved, shy, a deep thinker, animal lover, uhhhh... What is the most you have ever weighed? Let's not. Would you ever work at McDonald's? No. I'm never working in food service. If you aren't already, would you go vegetarian or vegan? I want to be a vegetarian and being a vegan would be perfectly ideal for me, but I really don't think I can healthily accomplish either. I am FAR too picky to where I'd almost definitely become malnourished. To make it even worse I absolutely cannot "suck it up" if I don't like a food, so it's not like I could choke down stuff I don't like. Not to mention I'd be pretty sad without any yummy food to look forward to, aha. Coolest person you've ever met? Uhhhh I don't know. Do you wear boxers? No. Girls, how old were you when you first learned how to put in a tampon? I don't remember. Would you ever attend a gay pride parade or festival? I would absolutely love to. Did you see Paranormal Activity 2? I think I've seen all of the movies. I liked them, given paranormal horror films are probably my fave. What would you do if an old man grabbed your ass? Kick him in the fucking balls so goddamn fast and probably slap him across the face at the same time. Probably cry later from feeling violated and having my fear of men aggravated. Do you like moustaches? It depends on the person, but I'd say I generally prefer an attached beard and a mustache versus JUST a mustache. Could you hack into someone's computer if you tried hard enough? No. I have no idea how to do that. Have you ever smoked a cigar? No. Do you go out on Black Friday? Hell no. NOT worth fighting people for deals. Do you have curtains in your bedroom? No; I have those blinds that you can close upwards or downwards. Did you like the Spice Girls when you were little? Yeah, I did. Can you sing the entire Fresh Prince of Bel-Air theme song? I think I can. Do you get heartburn? I'm literally on an antacid prescription, or else I get insane heartburn every day. Are you scared of elevators? To a moderate degree, yes. I'm terrified of it getting stuck. Have you ever seen a dead body in person? Yes, at an open-casket wake. Have you ever seen The Goonies? I have. If you're white, do you ever wish you were black? Or vice versa? I'm fine being Caucasian, but ultimately don't care. Do you bake cookies all the time around Christmas? I don't bake. Do you like your hair pulled? Uhhh... I'm assuming you mean this in a suggestive context, in which case no. Never pull my hair, actually. What kind of jeans do you like? Ripped skinny jeans. What do you think is overrated? Who really cares. Let people enjoy what they enjoy. And what are your goals for the remainder of this year? Lose lots of weight, find a job, get back into old hobbies and develop new ones... Name a city that starts with A in your state/province etc. Asheboro. Name a landmark that starts with M in your state/province etc. I'm blanking right now. When was the last time you gave a horse a carrot? Been years. I think I've only done that once, and I can't even remember where it was. Have you ever had to shovel snow? No. How many seasons is your favorite TV show in so far? MM was just revived for its fifth season! :') Where would you most like to go in your state, etc. that you haven’t been? NC actually has this really old Wizard of Oz theme park! It's on the other end of the state, though, and NC is one wiiiiiide state. What was the last bird you saw? A robin, I think. What color was the last thing you drank? Green. Has a wild animal ever been loose in your house? Besides insects, no. Well wait, scratch that, once or twice we had a small mice problem when we lived in the woods. What’s the name of the bookstores in your city? The only one I know off the top of my head is Books-a-Million. Where do your parents live? I live with my mom, and Dad lives in the same city as us. Have you ever seen or touched an iceberg? No, but that would be cool. What colour are your father’s eyes? Brown. If your ex turned up on your doorstep now, with nowhere else to go, would you let him/her stay? Well one, this isn't my house, so I can't make that decision. My mom being who she is though, she'd let pretty much anyone stay the night. If it was Sara, Mom would let her stay as long as she needed. The last time you cried, was it connected with someone of the opposite sex? Ugh, yes. My PTSD was BAD last night. Delicious warm brownies or a giant cookie? I'll take the brownie. Have you visited a haunted building or area before? No, but damn I'd love to. Have you been to North Carolina? Ayyyyeeeee that's my home.

#survey #surveys #random questions #lyrics: ''disguise'' by motionless in white

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sweetdejun · 5 years ago

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coterie: the black leather bracelet (1/2)

gang!x1 x fem!reader

synopsis: you’re an ordinary girl, with an ordinary life. but what happens when you catch the gang that is famous for keeping their deeds under the table, in action?

coterie’s masterlist can be found here

pairing: lee hangyul and y/n

a/n: sexual themes, cursing, mentions of alcohol and drugs, so proceed with caution.

the thin black leather weaved around your hand like it’s known the accessory for years now. as you showed the group, your cheeks reddened and your eyes widened, as the guy who flirtatiously introduced himself to you stepped up. ugh, you should have known. “oh, yeah!” he yelps, stepping forward, and hope over to give you a high five, which you timidly reciprocate. “you’re freaking her out, hangyul,” seungwoo scolds the boy, who pouts in response. “thanks for being a party pooper, hyung. anyways, y/n, meet me at the terrace tonight at 7. sharp. I’ll be waiting.” and with one more wink and a smirk, hangyul slips off down another hallway. pretty soon, you leave the group of boys, heading back into your own room. hangyul, you think. the name’s quite nice if it weren’t for the fact that his glare felt like a predator watching its prey. you only know what that look can lead to because as surprised as people usually get when you talk about it, you’re not a virgin. when you tell people that, the first thing they say is, “really?”, as if you admitted to something crazy. you’re in college, and your parents aren’t on your ass 24/7, and you’re also a functioning teen with raging hormones; it was going to happen eventually. but, just because you’ve lost your virginity, you definitely weren’t a sex-crazed person. you knew your limits, and in short, didn’t get much sex because, well, school and your future’s also been a more important priority (“as it should be,” you recall telling soobin when she tried to drag you to the club one Friday night... of course, you won that night and were binge-watching shows whilst she was out and about.) but even so, you’re very aware of what that look can lead to, and you don’t want to smash someone you will be working with, especially since you’ve just met. yeah, he was a good-looking guy, and you’re damn sure he knows it. his piercing gaze is what you see when you bounce onto your bed and shut your eyes and you let out a frustrated groan before you check the time. it was almost 7; the dark hours of the night came much faster than you liked. you took the leather bracelet with you, which you had tightly clenched in your palm when you returned to your room, as you left to the terrace. you wanted to return the piece of jewelry in case he’d wanted it back or something- you certainly didn’t want to keep it. you reached the terrace a few minutes after 7 and found hangyul standing with his back facing you, and his hands in his pocket. at the sound of your footsteps, he turned around. the wind blew threw his grey-dyed locks, and the moonlight reflected upon them, creating a halo-like effect. “ah, y/n, you’re late. but I guess better late than never, am I right?” he chuckles and shuffles closer to you until his face is inches away from yours. your eyes flutter at his sudden proximity and he scoffs, “why’re you nervous, princess? never been this close to a guy before?” who does he think he is, you think and you step back, squinting at him, irked. “no, I just like to keep my distance, that’s all,” you start. your outburst catches hangyul off guard but you continue anyway. “here’s your bracelet, pal,” you give it to him and he slips it back on right away, before saying, “it’s a shame you picked me, then.”

your eyebrows scrunch up at his remark. “what do you mean?” hangyul gives you one final smile before turning back towards the sky and replacing his hands back into his pockets. “you don’t know what I do, do you?” you shook your head, and responded, “no, I don’t, but the way you said that... makes me curious.” “I’m sure you are familiar with a... femme fatale, right?” he says. “a female who seduces people and fucks them up, for lack of better words,” you explain and his eyebrows go up. “wow, you know your stuff,” he praised, and you relaxed a bit. “yeah, I’ve seen a few characters like that in movies and stuff, so I am familiar with it.” hangyul’s smile is small as he says, “well, my job on this team is similar, to say the least. I’m the homme fatale of this team; the goal of this job is to get as close I can get to my targets, just so I can get enough information out of them, to hand over to our clients to use against them. how I get close to them, well, I’ll leave that to your imagination,” the wind picks up in temperature and speed, and you shiver. seeing this, hangyul, who was clad in a leather jacket, slid said article of clothing off his shoulders and draped it over you instinctively. “thanks,” you mumble, and you’re so glad it’s dark out because you feel your face getting a bit hot. “no problem. listen, if you don’t want to do this job, I get it. I won’t force you into doing anything you don’t want to do. I can talk to seungwoo and maybe he can find something else for you to do if you’re not comfortable with the idea. so before you make any sort of decision, I wanna give you some time. I understand that working with me, especially with the job I have, you may get uncomfortable easily. I mean, it’s not hard to notice how you’ve kind of tensed up since I mentioned the details. forget that, you look uncomfortable around me, and we haven’t even seen each other for a day.” you bite the inside of your cheek and keep your gaze on the ground. you sigh, before looking back at him, “it’s nothing, honestly. I just... it takes me time to warm up to someone. I guess you can say I never really act like myself around someone until I’ve had a better understanding of who they are, and I think they have a better understanding of who I am. so, if I made it seem like I don’t like you, that’s not the case at all. yeah, I’m slightly uncomfortable, but I’m genuinely like that with most people I meet for the first time.” hearing you speak up, the corner of hangyul’s mouth lifts up slightly. “that’s good. at least now I know you don’t hate me. but, regardless of what you say I’ll give you a few days. sleep on it, come to a decision and then let me know. and until then, stay warm, sugar.” his tongue runs along his lower lip before he leaves you in the terrace, his jacket still resting warmly against your body.

you go back to your room and shut the door. god, you think, you must’ve made a wrong first impression on him. well, to be fair, you did find his actions, uhh, violating. maybe it showed on your face. you feel your heart drop slightly and you feel the anxiety rise in you. great, now you feel bad. “why do things have to be so complicated?” your voice becomes muffled in your pillow, as you press it against your face and exaggerate a whine. it takes you a few moments to think about it. seungwoo told you that who you used to be won’t matter in this job. nor will whatever you do in this job affect your future life. confusion fogged your head, and you didn’t know what to do. the only thing you could hear was hangyul telling you to think about it before coming to a decision. then, your vision started to blur before everything went completely black.

you saw a nightclub; neon lights and the smell of booze quite fresh in the air, and sounds of people around you mixed terribly with the bass of the music. through the dancing drunken youth, against the bar counter sat two familiar figures. one of them was hangyul, who had taken down a shot of tequila, with a pretty girl securely wrapped in his free arm, his hand how caressing her waist and next to him, was you. you looked almost unrecognizable, but you knew it was you, it had to be. your hair was done all nice, and you were in a shimmery, gold mini dress, and heels. you seemed to be drunk, by the way your head was moving, struggling to stay steady. then you turned around and saw your gaze fixated in your direction, and a small smirk painted your red lips. you got out of your seat and walked through the sweaty crowds of people, only to balance yourself on the shoulders of some guy, and before anything could be done, you kissed him square on the lips. one thing led to another, and you managed to drag the boy into a corner, where you climbed on top of him, your lips now on his neck. things were getting hot and heavy, and before anyone could take it a step further, the boy froze. why? because the girl who was giving him a good time stopped to press a gun against his abdomen. “give me the syringes you have in your pockets, like a good boy,” you whispered against his ear. his shaky hands reached into his pockets and pulled out the drug-filled instruments then placed them in your free hand. “very good, baby. now that I have evidence against you, and there is a video recording of this being made, I’m going to make this very clear,” you start off, your thumb running across his quivering bottom lip. “you don’t want to ruin daddy’s reputation when he finds out this is what you’ve been using the tuition money for, right? he thinks he’s sent his son to a fine, foreign university, when really, he’s here blowing that money on prostitutes and drugs.” the boy shakes his head no, and the smirk appears once again on your smeared red mouth. “then take this pretty little face of yours, and move away to a different city. or country, I don’t give a fuck. but step away from mr. park’s daughter. he’s caught on to your little act, and if he finds you around his daughter again, remember the gun is only here, but I won’t hesitate to shoot next time. got it?” the boy stutters out a response before you give him a sickeningly sweet smile and then whisper, “now, shoo.”

you sit up, breathing heavily in the room. you blink rapidly and realize it was all a dream, but man, were you a badass or what? you feel this adrenaline rush through your veins, and it feels so fucking good. this is all it took? a dream to convince you that you wanted to take this job? apparently, it was more than enough because when the next day rolls around, and you’re looking for hangyul, you find him once again on the terrace the next night. you clear your throat, and hangyul turns around, a quizzical look in his eyes. taking a deep breath before releasing it, your gaze meets his before you say, “I’ve come to a decision, and yes, I’ll take the job.” hangyul’s eyebrows go up in surprise, and before he has a chance to express anything, you say, “I made this decision on my own, and yeah, I’m aware of any danger it could put me in, but I’m willing to try it out. for the fun of it.” hangyul laughs at this, before nodding, “alright, princess. welcome aboard.”

#coterie by sweetdejun #coterie #hangyul #lee hangyul #x1 hangyul #x1 lee hangyul #x1 #x1 series #x1 au #x1 aus #비상: QUANTUM LEAP #x1 quantum leap #quantum leap au #quantum leap #sweetdejun #kpop writing #kpop series #kpop au #kpop aus

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floatingpetals · 6 years ago

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Peace and Quiet?

Pairings: Steve Rogers x Reader

Warnings: Angst-ish, language, the reader makes a poor decision, fluff as well

Word Count: 5900+

Request: “I seriously love your longer one shots! Could you please do a Cap (or Bucky) + reader, where the reader is kinda loud/outgoing because of not wanting to be forgotten or something? And the reader figures they make him uncomfortable and shuts everyone out, leading to him confessing he likes the reader? Fluff please?” @homeybadger

A/N: Wow so uhh, this has been a request that’s been sitting in my inbox for sooooo looonnng. No seriously, like super long. I feel so bad that it’s taken me just now to get to it. I wanted to do something nice with it, but I just couldn’t get it right, then I forgot it was there and then I remember and scrapped the whole thing. I hope you enjoy this story and I hope the length makes up for it! I did not mean to take so long on this! I hope you all enjoy!!

**I’m also debating on doing a second part, but it all depends on the feedback I get. So please let me know what you think! ❤

Gifs not mine, credit to the creator!

“Oh, bad luck. You landed on Boardwalk,” Sam smirked, a giggle beginning to bubble in his chest as the rage that was settling on Y/N’s face across the table. She glared at the double dice, a freaking snake eye, that had been against her the entire game. “And if my math is correct, with my three houses you owe me $1400. And from the looks of your very sad pile, you’ll have to sell everything on top of declaring bankruptcy.”

“I hate this game!” Y/N screamed, throwing down the $300 hundred she had left.

“Hey, don’t hate the game!” Natasha shot back, grinning behind her beer bottle. Y/N shot her glare.

“Oh, shut up! You and Clint have been cheating the entire time and you know it!” she growled. Clint gasped but was cut off by a sharp jab in the ribs by Bucky. He grumbled and pulled out the chance cards he had stashed away, and nudge Natasha to pull out the money she had hidden away. “See! This game sucks!”

“Now, now. No need to go all green on us.” Tony grinned. Bruce made a noise before letting out a puff of air. Irritated with both the game and how smug everyone was acting, Y/N exploded with a primal battle cry.

“Fuck this game! You people are all cheaters!”

Everyone had enough time to grab their drinks off before Y/N flipped the table, the pieces flying everywhere. Bucky and Wanda both doubled over in their seats, howling when Y/N began to scream at Tony, who jumped up and was yelling back at the same volume. Clint and Natasha were grinning like idiots as the mayhem grew. Bruce rolled his eyes when Sam jumped in, normally the tone the room shifted would set him on edge, but this wasn’t unusual. The only person that wasn’t reacting, save for Vision who had no idea why tensions were so high over a silly game, was Steve.

He had decided to sit this game night out. After the Mario Party debacle, he wasn’t ready to jump back in the ring. Thor spun a wheel and tossed a dart to cut someone’s stars in half. He landed on Y/N’s. While she was once in the lead, that cut her stars in half and she was suddenly in last place. That was fine. It was when she was hit by Bowser, who Tony was playing as when they managed to let him loose of his little prison that she flipped her lid. The team got a kick out of her raging at the games, and all banded together to see how quickly she could snap. Steve, however, didn’t see the charm in it.

To put it lightly, Y/N was a lot to handle. She was everywhere all at once to begin with, her voice carrying through walls. There wasn’t a single mean bone in her body, aside from her intense competitive streak. She seemed to win over anybody. Steve still wasn’t sure. He’d admit, she was sweet and everyone else seemed to love her. Steve thought she was cute too, sometimes she would fall asleep on the couch and he’d find himself taking advantage of her stillness to stare. But she never stopped to breathe once it seemed. He couldn’t recall a time where she wasn’t talking loudly about something or practically bouncing off the walls from excitement. She was a lot more than he was used to. Y/N made his head spin. It wasn’t terrible, but it was a bit exhausting after a while around her. It also didn’t help that sometimes her power manifested with her growing emotions. Which is what was happening right now.

“You’re the one who wanted us to play this stupid game!” Tony accused, rolling his eyes.

“Did not! I specifically said that I thought it was a stupid idea because I always end up flipping a table! You’re the one who then said we had to play it since learning that bit of information.” She countered pointing a finger at him. Tony stopped, a sly grin spreading across his face.

“Oh yeah.”

“Ugh!” She grumbled. “You people are so frustrating! Why do you do this to me?!”

“Because it’s fun.” Tony grinned, his eyes flashing with glee. That was the wrong thing to say. Now Y/N really was angry. She grits her teeth and balled her fists at her side. If this was a cartoon, she’d have steam coming out of her ears she was so angry. Unbeknownst to her, her powers started to manifest with her mounting fury, afflicting the others in the room.

Y/N’s power was special and even a bit strange considering how specific it was. Since she could remember, Y/N always had the gift to control the aura around her to suppressed others authority and leadership skills. It was a power that had come handy in her life, but also hindered her more than it helped. She had a rather strong grip on it at all times, but sometimes that control slipped. Tony’s face paled, and everyone else around her started to shift uncomfortably.

“Uh-Y/N.” Wanda reached out, her fingers gently brushing against the back of Y/N’s arm. Wanda flinched, the contact enough to send her the full force of Y/N’s strange power, but she fought to stay strong. Y/N blinked, quickly realizing the shift in the room was because of her. Her shoulder’s dropped and the suffocating aura surrounding her disappeared. The room sighed collectively in relief.

“See. This is why you shouldn’t poke the bear.” Y/N huffed, crossing her arms against her chest. Tony chuckled and shook his head.

“It’s nice to know you’re aware.” Sam let out a laugh as well, grinning widely at her. She grumbled under her breath and turned to sit back in her seat. As she did, she scanned the room and noticed a spot empty. Standing straighter she glanced around the room.

“Hey, where did Steve go?”

The group collectively turned around, just now noticing the empty seat their Captain once took up as well. Bucky frowned and shot a look to Natasha, who seemed on the same page. Slowly, he turned to back to Y/N.

“Uh... Maybe he decided to turn in early.” He tried. The team seemed to take it, albeit skeptically. He had been doing this a lot lately, getting up at disappearing without a word. No one wanted to say it aloud, but they all noticed it happened around the time Y/N came to the team four months ago.

Y/N stilled, her eyes hardening for a split second before they seemed to glaze over. Shaking her head, she heaved a sigh.

“I’m gonna turn in early too. Sorry, this little outburst just took a lot out of me.” She said, stepping over the discarded pieces and was out of the room before anyone could argue. The room had shifted into a subdued atmosphere, everyone thinking the same thing.

“Someone needs to talk to him.” Wanda murmured. Bucky nodded, letting out a sigh.

“I’ll talk to him.” He said. The rest all murmured in agreement, slowly trickling out the room since game night clearly was done for the evening. They could only hope tomorrow would end on a better note.

~~~~~~~

Y/N sat on her bed, clinging to her favorite stuffed animal wondering just where she went wrong. Since she joined the team a few short months ago, she had been trying her best to get close to the rest of her teammates. Naturally, she was a bubbly person. But her gift made it harder for her to get close to anyone. Her parents thought it was odd, the power came from nowhere when she hit the age of three. It took them time to figure out that it wasn’t because she was incredibly intimidating and that she was unintentionally suppressing their confidence level.

They spent years taking her to doctors and specialists that might be able to help her control her powers. It wasn’t without consequences. Because she struggled for so long to control her powers, she spent a lot of her life unintentionally hurting those around her.

Her classmates didn’t know what exactly, but they knew something was wrong with her. She spent the majority of her school years alone in the corner, shunned from taking part of anything in her classes. If anyone tried to give her the benefit of the doubt, something always went wrong. They were terrified of her. The fear turned to indifference and eventually, they paid her no mind. No one wanted her in their lives. But for Y/N, she wanted nothing more than to be accepted and included.

Which might explain why she was the way she was today. It took years to master her control, but she did it. And now that she was an Avenger, she was surrounded by people who were like her. Special and unique. Nowhere else could she be herself as she could here. This was her last chance of being free and she never wanted to be forgotten.

It didn’t take her long to win over the others. They were more than aware of what she could do. Not a one batted an eyelash, no one shrank away in fear they’d be subjected to the smothering fear she could plague them with. If anything, it fascinated them. She was the one who they’d send in to interrogate. Whether on location or in a holding cell, it didn’t matter. Her power was a gift to get the tightest of lips to talk. For the first time in her life, Y/N felt as though she had finally found her calling.

Y/N was proud of how far she had come. It was years of uphill battles and year left in the shadows. But now, she had it all, friends, her family and a job she loved. All except the acceptance of Steve. He was polite, but he always had an air of discomfort around her. Not with anyone else, just her. Y/N hated to admit it, but it hurt.

Since the day she met him, Y/N fell hard. Who couldn’t though? He was charming, cared for his friends and protective of his family. But for some reason, he just didn’t seem like he enjoyed being around her. Perhaps, she thought, it was something she said to him. She couldn’t recall anything that might set his teeth on edge, but she was at a loss.

Letting out a heavy sigh, Y/N set her stuffed animal down on the bed and swung her legs over the side. She knew she shouldn’t dwell too much on it. He could very well be in a bad mood, and it could confidently only be when she’s in the same room. She snorted. Yeah, that was it.

No, she thought, there was something more about it. Thinking back all the times she noticed he’d got running, realization hit her like a freight train. Every time he ran, it was because of something she did. It was her. A broken sob crept it’s way up her throat. She was the reason, that was the only thing it could be. Steve Rogers, the man who unknowingly held her heart in his hands, was uncomfortable with her. She clenched the sheets of the bed and held back her tears.

Y/N had to change. Her behavior had always been a problem, she knew that. She was so terrified of being left alone and forgotten again, she let her eagerness go too far. Falling back on the bed, she stared at the ceiling and came to a life-altering decision.

~~~~~

“Hey! There you are!” Natasha grinned motioning Y/N over to her mat. “I was wondering if you’d ever show up or if I’d have to go up to pull you out of bed.”

Y/N didn’t respond with her usual quip, just sent her a tight-lipped smile and a soft apology. Natasha blinked her lack of typical response slightly off-putting. Where was her boisterous hello and never-ending pouts of energy? It was one of the fun things about working out with Y/N first thing in the morning. This wasn’t usual of her at all.

“Okay.” Natasha drawled, looking over Y/N to try and decipher her new attitude. “Well, let’s get started on stretching you at, then we’ll get on the mat to spar.”

Y/N wordlessly nodded, moving over to where the yoga mats were laid out waiting for her. Natasha took up the spot next to her, keeping her eyes especially close on Y/N. Aside from her uncharacteristically quiet demeanor, it didn’t seem like there was a hair out of place on her. Although, her movement seemed a bit on the robotic side. Y/N was just going through the motions, getting done with her stretches before wordlessly making her way over to the mats without a glance to Natasha.

Natasha sat up and watched Y/N leave without a word, flabbergasted. Things seemed fine last night, aside from Steve’s abrupt disappearance. As far as Natasha knew, Y/N had gone straight to her room to sleep. And everyone was either here in the gym or Tony and Bruce in the lap. So, what happened to Y/N?

“Hey, you okay?” Natasha asked, catching Y/N’s elbow.

“What do you mean?” Y/N tilted her head to the side, brows furrowed.

“I don’t know,” Natasha said slowly, her gaze narrowing the longer she stared at Y/N. “You just seem… off today.”

“Oh.” She uttered simply. “Yeah. I’m good.”

Pulling her arm away from Natasha, Y/N wandered over to where Sam was now standing with Bucky. Their smile grew at the sight of her, both unaware of Y/N’s new behavior.

“Good morning sunshine!” Sam beamed at her, wrapping her up in a hug. Y/N let out a faint giggle as she hugged him back. Bucky grinned and tilted his head in greeting.

“Morning doll. You sleep okay last night? I didn’t hear your snores through the paper-thin walls last night.” He teased, nudging her with his shoulder. Y/N huffed but surprisingly bit her tongue.

“Morning Bucky. Yeah, I slept fine.” Y/N shrugged, her face showing little to no emotions. “We ready to get started.”

Both men were stunned, completely thrown off by her sudden change. They shot Natasha a startled look, who could only shrug. She hadn’t the faintest idea either what happened. Y/N wasn’t supplying them with anything either, so all they could do was continue as if nothing was wrong. It didn’t mean they weren’t going to question her later of course.

Getting done with their training was odd, uncomfortable even. Y/N didn’t speak unless spoken to, and even then they were short simple answers. There was none of her usual spunkiness that fought back with each quip Sam sent her way. He even tried to rile her up, he almost pulled out all the stops in a hope to gain a reaction from her. But she didn’t move an inch. Bucky tried to get her to react when he threw a punch harder than necessary her way. They thought they had her, there was a spark of fury in her eyes after she picked herself up, but she quickly wiped the expression on her face.

In the end, Y/N went through the motions, doing what needed to be done without her usual flare. At one point, Wanda had even commented on how unusually quiet she had been. When Y/N left to head to the locker room, she cornered Bucky and Sam.

“What did you two do?” she hissed, jabbing a finger in Sam’s chest. He made a noise in the back of his throat offended at the accusation.

“What the hell makes you think we did anything?” Bucky crossed his arms across his chest. Wanda turned her narrow gaze to Bucky.

“Well. Something happened to her. And I know Natasha wouldn’t do anything to hurt her.”

“Oh and we would?” Sam snapped, shaking his head. “We didn’t do anything to her Wanda, she was like this when she came in.”

“He’s right.” Natasha interrupted, siding with the two men. “She’s been like this all morning. I have no clue why.”

The door the locker room opened, Y/N walking freshly out of the shower and a new change of clothes. She stopped short when she saw all four eyes locked on her across the room. Awkwardly, she waved to them before heading to the exit. Right as she reached it, Steve swung open the door, towel in hand. His steps faltered and a tight-lipped smile passed on her face.

The group couldn’t see her face from where they stood. All they could see was her nod her head once before stepping around Steve with a wide berth to head out the exit. Steve was left stunned. It wasn’t normal to not have his ear talked off when it came to Y/N. Blinking rapidly, he wandered over to Bucky, brows furrowed in confusion.

“What she say?” Wanda asked. Steve’s mouth fell open to answer but couldn’t find the right words.

“Uh… Nothing.” He shrugged.

“And you don’t find that strange?” Wanda asked the group, pinning each of them with her stare. Bucky bristled at the insinuation, his hands balling into fists.

“We never said it wasn’t. We just have no idea what’s wrong with her.” He snapped, stepping up with his back straighter and shoulders set. Wanda glared right back, red seeping into her eyes. Natasha wiggled her way between them, grumbling under her breath.

“Alright. Alright, enough.” She held her hands out to both, pushing them back. “Wanda, we have no clue what happened. Y/N walked in like this. It’s probably nothing and she’s just having an off day. Why don’t we just let whatever happened run its course and see how she is through the rest of the day. No point on biting each other’s heads off when we all did nothing wrong.”

The group grumbled their agreement, still not at ease with how the morning had turned. Steve was just as concerned as the rest. It was odd that she didn’t greet him with her megawatt smile when he walked in the gym, and it was odd how her face seemed to tighten at the sight of him. All he got this morning was a tight-lipped smiled before she ran out the door. What was even odder was the fact that she seemed to give him as much space as possible. As if she didn’t want to get too close.

Steve turned to the door, his brows creased and mouth in a tight line. Something was going on with Y/N, but who was he to worry about her?

~~~~~~~~

Things hadn’t gotten much better with Y/N over the next few days. She had stopped taking part in the loud discussions that always managed to start up in the kitchen or the living room. Her words were short and few in between, but she didn’t seem upset. Just much more subdued than usual. When someone would speak to her, so would she. But it was never the same volume as before.

Sam and Clint both made it their mission to get her to snap. They did everything from switching her sugar to salt in her coffee to going into her room and putting baby powder in her hair dryer. Nothing worked. She would just sigh and turn her back to them, shoulders tense. They thought she’d give up and go back to her old ways, but nothing worked. Not even Natasha could get her to admit what was wrong.

Steve, however, was taking her attitude change harder than the rest. Don’t ask him why he didn’t even know. He thought he’d prefer her at a lower decibel, he assumed she would be more manageable and easier to get along with. But this, this wasn’t what he thought it would be like. To him, it almost seemed creepy. This wasn’t the Y/N he had come to know. The wasn’t the same woman in the slightest. It was as if someone else swapped personalities with her.

Y/N hadn’t shown any improvement in her attitude in the field either. Actually, she seemed to be less productive now. One of the ways she managed to get people to confess was using her power and then releasing it. There she’d act like a good cop, bargaining with them for information and if they didn’t give her what she wanted, she’d switch her powers back on again. Now, she just threw herself into it. There was no build up, no false sense of security.

Just last week they needed information about the next hit Hydra ordered. They apprehended one of the agents and sent in Y/N to get out the information when he wouldn’t fess up. The team assumed the old Y/N would come out now that she was in the field. Instead, she walked in and used the full force of her powers on the man. She was already so powerful, but she had a strong grip on her control. When her power flared to life, even with the thick walls it suffocated everyone.

The agent instantly started sobbing, blubbering like a small child before it grew to mindless screaming for mercy. As it turns out, her power can actually break the human spirit and shatter their sanity into a thousand pieces. It only affected the man in front of her, but it still rattled the rest of the group. Steve was furious.

“What the hell was that?!” He snarled, dragging Y/N into a conference room. She blinked, her face unmoving despite the rage rolling off him in waves. Tony, Fury, and Maria both sat around the meeting table, their mouths pulled into thin lines. She tore her gaze away, refusing to look at anyone in particular as Steve raged on. “You ruined any chances of getting information out of him!”

“Actually Cap, she ruined any chance of him being a normal human being again,” Tony interjected, pulling up a hologram of the doctor's report. The mental status report had been sent in a few moments before Steve dragged her in. The poor man couldn’t remember his name let alone the information they needed.

Y/N pinched the bridge of her nose between her fingers and let out a heavy breath. When she opened them, their faces hadn’t changed a bit. Settling on a point at the table, the brief glimpse she caught of their expressions was burned in her mind. Steve was livid, Tony seemed borderline irritated with a hint of amusement, while Fury and Maria both had a hard expression that told her she was in for it for the next few weeks.

“Look. I’m sorry. I let a few personal matters get to me and clearly, I didn’t handle it well.” She said calmly. Steve flinched at how lifeless she sounded when she mentioned her personal matter and shot Tony a concerned look. Tony tilted his head in acknowledgment, he too aware of the pain she seemed to be suppressing. “I can’t promise it won’t happen again by accident, but I’ll make sure to put more training in to ensure it doesn’t.”

Fury shifted in his seat, folding his hands on his crossed knee. His single eye narrowed as he looked her over and gave her a curt nod.

“See that it doesn’t agent. Dismissed.” He said curtly. Y/N’s eyes fluttered shut for a spilt-second before she jerked her chin and spun at heel to leave the room. After the door shut behind her, Fury grunted.

“What did you people do to her?” He accused, leveling Steve and Tony with a stare. Both men frowned and glanced at the other.

“We didn’t do anything.” Tony snapped, narrowing his eyes. Steve set his hand on the back of a chair and sighed.

“She’s been like this for almost a week now. This is the first time she’s actually admitted something wrong.” Steve replied, his brows furrowing at the tightness in his chest at the idea. It wasn’t like Y/N to keep everything bottle up inside her like this.

“Well, whatever’s wrong with her, fix it,” Fury ordered. “She needs to be in complete control and that can’t happen when her minds on other things.”

Pushing back the chair he stood, Maria right behind him. Not waiting for a reply, he grabbed the folder off the desk and briskly left the room with Maria following. Steve flinched when the door snapped shut behind them. Tony scoffed.

“You can get rid of that sad puppy dog look, Captain.”

Steve frowned, his head snapping up to Tony.

“What’s with the tone, Tony?” He asked. Tony rolled his eyes and leaned back in his seat.

“We all know you don’t like Y/N, you put up a good front though.” He waved a hand absently. “But when you dart out of a room anytime she comes in, or you won’t sit to talk with her when she comes to find you, it gets pretty noticeable.”

Steve stood taller, his mouth drawing into a tight line. He opened his mouth to argue, but it dawned on him. He hadn’t been the most welcoming person to Y/N in the few months she’s been here. Was that really how everyone perceives him? Tony smirked and shook his head.

“To put it simply; you’ve been an ass to our Y/N, and I wouldn’t be surprised if it was something you did.” Groaning softly under his breath, Tony stood and grabbed his tablet. Steve’s face fell, the notion her change might have been because of him made his stomach turn. Tony clapped a hand on his shoulder, his mouth pulled into a tight line. “Like Fury said, we’re going to fix this. But don’t worry. We won’t waste your precious time.”

At that, Tony left Steve alone in the conference room, the sting of his words lingering behind. Steve’s shoulder slumped. Maybe this had been his fault. But when? How? He really didn’t think it would have been that big of a deal to leave early after the game. Maybe he thought wrong and she did take it wrong. That wouldn’t mean this complete 180 though, would it? It wasn’t the first time he escaped a game night gone wrong, and she didn’t seem upset them. Perhaps it was something else. That had to be it. He really hadn’t done anything wrong, at least he didn’t think he did.

“Hey FRIDAY,” Steve called. Immediately, the AI system responded.

“Yes, Captain?”

“Go back to the last game night, the one with monopoly, did anything happen to Y/N between the time I left, and she went to bed?” He asked. Silence met him as the computer searched the data.

“No, it doesn’t seem like anything happened. She never left her room once she entered either.” FRIDAY replied. Steve frowned, even more, confused than before. So if there wasn’t anything that happened to her then what was with change?

Clenching his jaw, Steve knew he needed to get to the bottom of this. Not just as a Captain to his team, but as a way to make up for being such a shitty housemate. And maybe even as a way to start an actual friendship with him. Now that he’s seen this side of her, he realized how judgment and close-minded he was. He needed to find her and talk with her.

~~~~

Y/N had just stripped out of her suit and into her PJs when there was a hesitant knock on the door. She frowned. She wasn’t expecting anyone tonight, especially not after she just got her ass handed to her. Reluctantly she went to open the door and was surprised at the person on the other side.

Steve stood there awkwardly, his hands in his pockets. She blinked and took a step back.

“Uh… hi?” she greeted cautiously. Steve smiled hesitantly and shifted from foot to foot.

“Hey. Can we talk?”

“W-Why?” She clutched on the handle and shifted behind the door in an attempt to hide behind it. Steve noticed and his smile fell. He sighed and ran his fingers through his hair.

“I know I’m the last person you want to talk to. I’ve not been the most welcoming and I want to apologize. Can I please come in?” He asked earnestly. Y/N was caught off guard at his sincerity. Nodding numbly, she pulled the door open and let him in her room.

Steve glanced around the room, noticing the number of pictures she had hanging up on her wall, pretty fairy lights cascading down the walls illuminating each photo. Her comforter was a light lilac with stuffed animals on the bed. He eyed the little knickknacks matched the rest of her décor on her desks and shelves adding to the warmth and homey feel her room had. Realization hit him that he really hadn’t taken the time to get the real her.

“Go ahead and have a seat.” Y/N waved to the bed before sitting on the other end. Steve sank into the plush mattress, taking a moment to look over Y/N. She refused to make eye contact, to busy wringing her fingers together to notice him staring. Once again, he was struck by how beautiful she was, and how poorly he handled everything.

“Look Y/N, I don’t know what happened the past few days and why you’re acting different, but somethings changed. We all can see it.” He said. Y/N opened her mouth to argue but thought better of it. Steve continued on. “I don’t know what happened, but it hurts all of us to see you like this. It’s like you’ve lost a huge part of yourself and we’re seeing this empty shell. I mean, Sam and Clint both are losing their minds because what ordinarily would work on getting you riled up is doing nothing. And Bucky’s beside himself, Natasha and Wanda are worried sick, and Tony is pissed because-.” Steve stopped short, his face twisting into a pained expression. “He thinks I’m the reason.”

Y/N tensed, her breath catching in her throat. It was minuscule, but Steve caught it. He sat taller and his stomach sank.

“It is because of me.” He whispered sadly. He tore his eyes away from her to stare blankly at his hands. Y/N closed her eyes but didn’t deny it. “I’m sorry. I know I’ve not been accepting. I didn’t mean to hurt you though.”

Y/N nodded slowly, biting her lower lip as he kept talking.

“Truth is, you intimidate the hell out of me. I’ve never met someone who was so sure of themselves and so incredibly proud about it. You held nothing back and you’re so willing to put your heart on your sleeve, I kind of envy you a little. People loved you right of the bat and your just so sweet inside and out. I mean, you didn’t let anyone tell you to chill out before. Which leaves me to ask, why now? Why did I affect you so much that you changed everything about you?”

That caused Y/N’s face to heat up. No way was she going to admit it aloud! It was already embarrassing enough Steve knew he was a reason why she changed, but for him to know what the full reason was mortified her.

“Y/N.” He gently took her hand in his, the corners of his lips turned up. “You don’t have to tell me. I just want you to know that no matter what you think, I don’t hate you. I never did. Matter of fact, I really like you. More than I thought. It didn’t hit me how much I’d come to admire and appreciate your take on life until now. I miss hearing you bicker with Tony about the best brew coffee first thing in the morning or when you and Bucky gang up on Sam. I know Natasha and Wanda miss having their best friend. And game nights will never be the same without you threatening and then following through with flipping a table.”

Y/N giggled and ducked her chin. His grin grew, finally seeing a glimmer of her former self.

“I’m not asking you to forgive me for how I’ve behaved. I can only ask you’ll give me a chance to make up for being such a shitty person.” He grinned.

“Language, Captain.” Y/N teased.

“Is that ever going to die?” Steve groaned and rolled his eyes. “Wait you weren’t even there!”

“I know but hate to break it to you, it’s here for the long haul.” Y/N giggled and shook her head. Steve’s laughter joined hers, his smile stretching from ear to ear. He titled his head to the side after a beat before letting out a sigh.

“So, are you going to be okay?” He asked hopefully. Y/N let out a deep breath, for the first time all week feeling lighter. She was so drained from keeping her emotions in check, it took every ounce of her strength not to react to the attempts at making her snap. She knew it was ridiculous trying to change, but she really thought it was for the better. Turns out, it not only damaged her but everyone she loved.

“Yeah. I think I’ll be okay.” She spoke confidently. Steve patted her thigh and quickly stood.

“Good, because Tony discovered some new game called The Jackbox Party Pack or something along those lines.” He extended a hand and waited for her to take it.

“Wait, right now?” She asked surprised. He nodded and took her hand.

“Yup. Come on. Team bonding time.”

Y/N laughed, letting him pull her up and drag her out of the room. He looked at her over his shoulder, his breath catching in her throat at the way her face lit up from her grin. Turning back quickly, he hoped she didn’t notice the way his ears turned pink. He was an idiot for not taking the time to get to know her. He wasn’t going to ruin his chance with her a second time. Maybe it wasn’t going to easy, but for Y/N he knew it would be worth it.

Perma Tag: (CLOSED)

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Steve Tag: (Open)

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#steve rogers x reader #steve rogers fanfiction #steve rogers fanfic #steve roger fic #steve rogers #captain america #captain america fanfiction #captain america imagine #captain america fanfic #marvel fanfiction #marvel imagine #marvel fanfic #marvel fic #reader insert #steve rogers angst #steve rogers fluff #steve rogers imagine

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forkanna · 5 years ago

Link

[AO3 LINK] [WATTPAD] [QUOTEV]

"Go on without me."

"What?" Kristoff piped up. "Why, did you forget something?"

"Yes!" she seized on, actually pointing at him. "I forgot something, but I… do not want you to come with me. To get it. The something."

Honey was smirking, though as it turned out, not because she had sussed the situation. "Have to make a phone call, hm? Fine. We'll save you a spot on the sand." Then she was tugging Kristoff away before he could protest any further, though he still shot a couple of looks over his shoulder.

And now Elsa… had to think fast. This was a disaster. She wasn't ready to come out! But she couldn't let her internet acquaintance come all this way for nothing, either! Maybe she was wrong; maybe the voice was just strikingly similar to the one she adored. But the body poking down and out from under the brim of that beanie was also a match. And when the girl turned away from the desk, frustrated with the man and preparing to stomp out the front door-

Anna.

Seconds left now. As an actor, she had taken extensive improv courses; even if she was still an awkward bean, sometimes that skillset came in handy. As it would now.

"You are alright, ja?"

"Huh?" Anna asked, looking up at her with teary eyes. She hesitated a moment when she got a really good look at Elsa… distracted by her obvious beauty. Was the jig up already? Then shook her head hard, red braids bouncing to and fro.

"O-oh… n-nah, I'm just… dumb. Thanks." And she prepared to brush past, but Elsa jogged to the side to block her path.

"I vill say you are not dumb." It had been a while since she dusted off her Swedish accent - not since the evil twin episode - but Anna didn't seem to notice. "But you are upset. Vill you join me… for a drink?"

"Don't have any money." Her lip wobbled before she did a decent imitation of a polite smile. "Stupid, right? What am I doing here, why did I drive all this way… nah. Doesn't matter."

"No, no, I pay. Come to here." She gestured to the bar at the far end of the lobby's lounge, with its neon lights and vest-wearing mixologist.

Anna frowned, squirmed uncertainly… then sighed and followed her. They got seated and she ordered a beer, asking for "something on tap", and Elsa asked for a Heineken - leaning into her role. Since ordering her an Arbor Mist would have given her away. Then she laid a hand on the younger girl's shoulder.

"This is important to you, ja? It is not stupid. Please, I have an ear to listen."

"No, it's…" She drummed her fingers on the bartop as she slouched down. "She's so… I drove here because I knew a friend was going to be here. But like, I've never met her in person; I don't even know her name. And she didn't know I was coming, so like, I'm kind of a gross stalker - which is really dumb, since I accused her of being one before. How the turn tables, as Michael Scott would say."

"Hmm. Vell… I do not know dis Michael," she replied, making Anna snort in distant amusement. "But I am sure… your friend will not be angry." And she wasn't. Distressed, yes, and panicking, but not at all angry. Quite the opposite; she was touched.

"It doesn't matter!" she burst out as her head thonked against the bar. "I can't wait here! Like, I'm not a paying customer! I'm still not, so as soon as you head to your room they're gonna call the cops, I'm pretty sure."

"They vill not. You vill come to the beach vith me, and… ve vill figure out what to do."

"No…" She sat back up and took a deep breath, then let it out slowly as she came to a decision. "No. This is my fault. Like, I did the dumb thing, I gotta go home and face that I just burned a bunch of gas because I'm way too impulsive. Why didn't I just… ask her? Text her? Noooo, I had to do the big 'surprise! It's that weirdo from the internet!' thing instead!"

By the end of it, Elsa was smiling down at her. Perfect. This girl was actually even better than her halfassed fantasies had told her she was.

"Nej, you vill not do dat. Come to the beach, please?"

"I don't… I mean, I do want to come, but I don't deserve it." Now the tears came for real; she had managed to hold them back until then. "I j-just want to see her and tell her I'm sorry. But I can't. S-so I gotta go drive off a pier or something now."

"Drive off later. Beach. Now."

Taking a big swig of her beer, she shrugged. "Alright. At least it gets me out of that jerkface's thinning hair for a little while." With a nod toward the front desk, she got up from her stool. "Thanks, um…"

Why not? "Elsa. And you?"

"I'm Anna, Anna Granger." She held out her free hand formally, then blinked and laughed. "Ugh… too many interviews with professors and shit. Sorry to get all formal."

"It is fine," she chuckled, taking it and shaking anyway. "I am happy to meet you. Let us walk."

They walked. Once out on the deck, Elsa appreciated something she hadn't quite been able to put her finger on before; Anna in clothes. She had seen all kinds of slutty outfits on her, but never this jeans-and-tee combo with ratty old Converse. Too cute. The setting sun just barely caught in her aquamarine eyes, and the shadows flickering in and out of her coppery hair as they passed the electric tiki torches were like spirits at play. Every freckle was one she wanted to kiss…

Yeah. She had it bad.

"Thanks for hanging out," Anna whispered with a weak smile. "I'm… really Cusacking it."

"Hm? Cusacking?"

"Y'know… from Say Anything?" Elsa was starting to catch on, but still listened. "He makes the big dumb gesture, and it's not quite enough but everything turns out okay? Feels like one of those deals."

Elsa shrugged. "Perhaps it is, ja. Tell me about this woman you do not know, but you know."

"Oh… she's amazing. An actor who works really hard, like, I can tell it's killing her but she loves it. I know she's tall, and she's thin… hot yoga? Dumb stuff I probably shouldn't remember. She likes her coffee with peppermint, sweet potato fries. Oh - and she probably has a 3DS in her purse. Unless she decided not to bring it on vacation…"

As they got to the beach, Elsa made a mental note to keep her purse closed. She also suddenly realised there was a very large obstacle to keeping this whole thing incognito. Two of them, in fact… and they were already waving her down so animatedly that people on the hotel roof could have seen them.

"Ohhhhh Scheiße."

To Be Continued…

#Very Important Person #forkanna writes #elsanna #elsanna fanfiction #jess the writer #say anything

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aj-the-psycho · 5 years ago

Text

The Band of Rotten: Chapter 7

COINCIDENTAL

TW: implied homophobia; internalized homophobia

Summary: Baylen and Remy reached an agreement, while on the other side of the sea Virgil and Logan set sail to France.

Ao3 Link

France, 1860

Remy followed the captain up the wooden steps to the landing leading to the captain’s cabin. The fire-lit room was warm as the walls kept the cold breeze away. There was a desk in one corner, delicate carvings adorned the dark wood with a heavy chair to match. On it were a mess of yellowing papers and a single unlit candle. A tall shelf sat on the other side of the room right by the bed.

“I wouldn’t have guessed for you to like reading,” Remy said as he looked through the books on the shelf.

“What? Those?” Baylen sat on his thin mattress—which was essentially stips of fabric layered thick on a wooden divan. “I acquired some of those during… um… travels.”

“You mean raid work? Isn’t that what you mean?”

“That’s one way to put it.”

“Why?” Remy turned, facing the other with a hard glare. “Why did you have to lie and—”

“Because, m’lord,” Baylen interrupted with a mock at the nobleman, putting on an obnoxious expression, “you wouldn’t have joined me if I hadn’t done that. Now, be truthful; will you ever help a pirate?”

Remy’s answer was clear in his expression. He didn’t need to answer for Baylen to know his thinking. Baylen turned to his small bedside table and took the still-warm cup of tea into his hand. He sipped his tea while paying careful attention to the fine nobleman standing before him. He looked much more stunning without the cover of shadows. He knew, of course, that people have certain disdains and misjudgments about homosexuality. But having had spent his life out in the ocean, he found adhering to the rules of society to be pointless. Besides, he isn’t the only one in the crew who was out of the ordinary. Baylen set his cup of tea back on its saucer, nodding at the empty cup sitting on the table for Remy to take.

“Tea?”

“Alright,” Remy sighed.

He walked over with a straight and stiff posture, a habit acquired from years of training as a noble. Back in his family home, there were many rules and protocols. “You have to set your back straight. Chin up! Be proud.” He still remembered the words of one of his teachers who were paid handsomely by the Arlotti family. Genette was one of the teachers he actually liked. She was strict, but gentle and understanding. She was more present than even his own mother. Remy let out a heavy sigh after taking a sip of his tea.

Remy looked over at Baylen once again. The pirate was looking wistfully out the door which stood ajar. Remy couldn’t seem to get his gaze off of the pirate’s blind eye. It was fully visible now without the white cloth which had previously covered half his face. The eye was a murky white—almost yellowish in tone, like white butter. The eye lid was torn, a deep scar running along the skin. He wondered what had happened that gave Baylen the scar, but he didn’t dwell on the thought.

“What are you looking at?” Baylen asked defensively, reaching up to cover his eye.

“Nothing.” Remy took another sip of his tea. “What did you want to talk about?”

“Ah, yes.” Baylen stood, walking over the door and closing it gently. He turned, facing Remy with a neutral expression—which unsettled the nobleman as his face was naturally hard and even more intimidating with the scar on his eye. “I would like to now return the favor to sail you to America.”

“No, thank you. I cannot trust you. And I am not sorry to say so, because I find your actions rather appalling and repulsive.”

“Such words, my lord.”

“Do not address me as such,” Remy said firmly.

“Why not? It is the correct way to address a nobleman.”

“It is, but I rather hate it. Just my name is enough.”

“Alright, then,” Baylen responded with a mocking bow of the head. It seems everything that he did has an underlying of ridicule and tease, whether intentional or not. “Aside from my appalling and repulsive actions, what other things are not in your favor?”

“Oh, I don’t know,” Remy said with deep sarcasm. He put one hand on his hip, putting his weight on one leg—standing in a way no noble should. “Maybe, just maybe, I can’t trust you. You’re a liar, obviously.”

“Where did this attitude come from?”

“It’s what I do when faced with foolish questions.”

“Goodness. I never thought someone could insult me and make me laugh at the same time.” Baylen howled with laughter. “You are rather amusing. Your mother must have had a difficult time with such a mouthy son such as you.”

“No. Mother didn’t care.” Remy raised an eyebrow. “Anyways, can we hurry this conversation? You know my decision on this matter, and I’m ready to leave.”

“May I suggest an alternative for you?”

“Be quick, would you.” Remy retained his composure, folding his arms at his back and standing with his usual stiff posture.

“I assume you do not have legal papers for you to go on another ship to sail to your destination. With me, you are not required to give any form of payment, and no papers are needed.”

There was a moment of silence as Remy thought things through. He gestured for the pirate to continue without a word. In the meantime, he poured himself some more tea. It had been a few weeks since he’d had any kind of caffeine in his system—obviously required to keep him up with his unstable sleep schedule. Baylen’s tea was quite extraordinary, better than the one he had at home. Undoubtedly a raid work as well. Remy frowned at the thought of consuming something that was not rightfully his, but he’d do anything for tea, even if it meant ignoring his morals.

“A journey to America with a commercial ship will take you six weeks, or even eight if there were to be dangerous weathers. With my ship, we can get there in four weeks at most. Perks of having a pirate ship; it moves quickly.”

“How do I know I can trust you?” Remy asked, intrigued at Baylen’s words yet hesitant.

“Oh, you can’t trust me. But as long as René and Collette are here, you’ll be fine.”

“And that’s supposed to be reassuring?” The nobleman scrunched his face with confusion. “What was that supposed to mean?”

“Yes, it was meant to be reassuring. Those two are my impulse control.”

Remy narrowed his eyes in bewilderment at the pirate’s odd words and actions. Still, he found it rather comical, which was a refreshing change from the seriousness of a noble life. He weighed his options once more. It was true he had no legal papers on him. Though he did have a good amount of money. He could perhaps bribe one of the captains on shore, but that could result in him becoming penniless. In that case, there was no use for going to America in the first place. He let out a tiny frustrated sigh, almost inaudible. He looked over at Baylen again with distrust. The pirate already knew his decision by the time he said it.

“Fine. I’ll go with you,” Remy finally answered with dread. “While you mentioned for no payment to be made, is there anything I should give you?”

“You helped me get my ship back, so that’s enough for me,” Baylen answered. A smirk grew slowly on his lips. “But that being said, you could pay me with a good night on my bed.”

“Ugh, you’re disgusting!” Remy shouted, irk and shock apparent in his voice. He was speechless for a minute as Baylen whooped with laughter. “I hope God will forgive your sins, because it seems you have too much.”

Remy took a step back in disgust. He watched Baylen laughed, stomach heaving with short breaths. And at that moment, he found himself bothered by Baylen’s lack of clothing. He could see the hard lines of muscles across the pirate’s torso, along his strong-looking shoulders and a few lines across his stomach. He didn’t care before, but he couldn’t seem to stand it now. He couldn’t admit that perhaps a tiny piece of him found the pirate attractive, but he had to forget these disgusting urges lest he would commit a sin. He tore his gaze away, red-faced and ashamed of himself.

He shoved past Baylen, who was still laughing quite violently and into the open deck outside. He closed the door behind him, taking a deep breath. Too bad he left his cup of tea inside the cabin. Not a second, the door to the cabin opened. The captain stuck his head through the open door.

“Come with me to shore in an hour once the sun fully sets. We’ll need to acquire more provision for our journey.” There were still traces of laughter in Baylen’s voice.

__________

England, 1860

The port was buzzing, even more crowded than the city. Virgil carried with him seven apples and two bottles of juice which he had stolen hours ago in the market. He put the all in a small leather satchel he had taken in one of the shops they passed on their way and had kept Tessa’s pocket watch with him, too. Logan had warned him about getting caught and illegality of things, but Virgil ignored him.

“We’re here,” Virgil announced unnecessarily. “Too many people, which I hate.”

“You seem… extroverted enough,” Logan said with confusion. This little thief seems to do well with people.

“I don’t know what extro-something means.”

“Extroverted. Extraversion is, in a nutshell, when you are more open to people and general social activities.”

“Well, Logan, for someone who is seemingly clever—” Virgil stepped over a puddle with ease while snatching a woman’s wallet— “I should say you’re quite clueless. Your assessment of me is very wrong.”

Logan furrowed his brows in irritation. Having his intelligence insulted was not something he could take lightly. He didn’t understand why people would judge him before making an effort to get to know him at all. He brushed it off. A little insult from a thief was comparable to nothing. He tried keeping up with Virgil who had slipped past a few people, getting around with ease in the middle of the crowd. Logan shoved past, murmuring apologies every time his shoulder bumped on another person. He wondered how Virgil could move with such ease.

They finally arrived at the edge of the port where a row of booths stood. Virgil pointed to one of the booths, shoving Logan forward to buy some tickets. It was then they both realized they couldn’t buy their sailing tickets.

“I can only buy one with the price they have,” Logan said desperately. “I will have to leave you.”

“No, you’re not going to do that.” Virgil looked around him until he finally spotted something which attracted his eyes. “Give me a minute.”

“Before you go,” Logan grabbed the collar of Virgil’s tunic, preventing him to move. “I am not letting you steal. Besides, money isn’t our only problem.”

“What do you mean, smarty?”

“For one, while I do have legal papers to travel, you don’t. So, you will have to stay here.”

“Oh no, no, I can take care of that easily as well,” Virgil insisted, squirming out of Logan’s grip. “There’s no other way, so you have to let me do it.”

“Fine.”

With a satisfied grin, Virgil slipped back into the crowd. He spied a man walking alone. He wore a brown cap and black overalls overtop an ashy-white shirt. His shoes were worn and dirty. A factory worker it is. He moved lithely, finally standing behind the man. He bumped onto the man, slipping his hands to reach into the man’s pocket.

“Oh! Sorry, lad,” Virgil said with an innocent smile when the man turned. “The crowd’s quite a big hassle for a little fellow like me.”

“That’s okay,” the man said warmly. “G’day to ya, fellow!”

With a nod, Virgil disappeared into the sea of people. He looked down on his hands. A crumpled piece of paper in one and a handful of money in the other one. He hoped it was enough money. He shoved his way back to where Logan stood by a ticket booth, giving the scientist the money and waving the paper he took. Good thing Mrs. Brookes in the orphanage had taught him how to read and write. He wasn’t entirely helpless that way.

“Alright, smarty.” Virgil opened the folded paper and read over it quickly. “For the next six or so hours, my name is.... Cassius Brown… What kind of name is Cassius? People are getting very creative with names.”

“You really need to stop doing that.”

“What other choice do I have?”

“You could… I don’t know, in all honesty.”

“Exactly. Now get on with the tickets.”

After an hour in the queue, Logan finally purchased two tickets with a few shillings to spare. He pocketed the tickets and changes, walking over to where Virgil stood nearby an unlit street lamp. He could have bought one ticket for himself and board a ship without Virgil knowing. At the same time, he knew he couldn’t do that. That would be both rude and selfish. What motivation this little thief had, Logan knew not. On the one hand, he was content with travelling alone without the trouble of having a companion. At the same time, he might need the help, even if it came from stealing—surely there must be another way, but Logan couldn’t think of one.

It was noon. They would arrive in France by sundown—hopefully. Logan walked on the stone-paved harbor in a leisurely pace. His analytical mind did not stop its turning gears of thoughts. In his mind questions kept coming up. He wasn’t exactly sure what he will do once he set foot on America. He will definitely have to find a job. He’ll worry about that later.

“Our ship should already be here,” Logan said with his usual professional air. “We should board now.”

They searched for the ship. It was a giant wooden structured, all polished to perfection. The only traces of flaws were the mussels and algae eating at the bottom of the ship. This time, Logan led the way, stepping into the ship first while Virgil followed behind him. He turned behind him to find Virgil with a small leather pouch full of coins.

“Where did you get that?” Logan asked, knowing the answer already.

“Uhm, well, it fell so I took it and I was going to give it back to the person, but then when I looked around again he wasn’t here… so I think I have the right to this now…”

“No.” Logan leveled him with a stern gaze. “Absolutely not, you—you just—I—you are horrible.”

“Wow, that’s the nicest thing anyone has ever said to me,” Virgil said sarcastically with a smirk. “Don’t worry about it, smarty. Let’s find a seat. There, on the deck. The view is nice.”

With an exasperated sigh, Logan followed the thief up to the deck, finding a bench to sit on with a view of the sea. The ship had not set sail yet, but the ocean breeze was already quite strong. There might be a storm waiting to come in a few days. He decided not to sit around, getting up and walking over to the railing. He leaned over, careful to keep a strong grip on his briefcase so as not to let it fall into the water. He felt someone leaned over next to him. Virgil looked out into the ocean, eyes full of wonder.

“Never seen the ocean before?”

“I have,” Virgil answered, voice filled with awe. “Just not this close to the water.”

“The ocean is fascinating. But I think the sky and vast space is much more interesting. There are many things we have yet to explore.” Logan looked up to the sunny blue sky. “Who knows what is to be found up there. Whether we are alone or not in this universe, either answer is terrifying.”

The two stayed in silence, enjoying the warm breeze which carried with it the smell of salt and fish. After half an hour of waiting, the ship started moving and sailed away.

__________

France, 1860

René jumped from the rope ladder off the side of the ship into the small row boat below. Baylen followed behind him, then Collette. Remy had been hesitant. He didn’t know what it was that Baylen wanted to do, but as soon as he knew René and Collette will be coming as well, his doubts diminished. After he had hopped into the boat, Baylen took one oar and René took the other. It was a quick trip compared to when Remy rowed by himself. The pirates’ trained muscles were used to the hard work.

“What exactly are we doing?” Remy nudged at Collette’s side.

“You know, buying provisions and other things, too,” Collette answered coolly. “Also, you’ll need some new clothes if you want to sail with us, fancy boy.”

Soon enough, the boat gently kissed the beach. They clambered out, bare feet on wet sand before finally drying off to wear their shoes. They walked into the town. The pirates had changed their attired to look less menacing with their pirate get-up, wearing simple clothing instead. Baylen had half his face covered again. Collette still wore her braid lying gently on one of her shoulders, albeit a little neater. René looked just like they usually do. Remy, on the other hand, looked rather odd with his too-clean white tunic and too-neat black pants to match.

They split into pairs, searching the town for any small shops where they can buy something. One might ask, why would pirates need to acquire provision when they raid ships? Of course, but without adequate weapons they cannot do their raiding effectively. All it will do is land them in court, arrested by the marine forces of the kingdom. Besides, a little extra whiskey in the ship wouldn’t hurt. With all the raid jobs they’ve done, the three pirates were prepared to spend their money in the town. It truly was an odd bunch of pirates.

“Where are we going now?” Remy asked René. He had been glad when he was given a choice of who he wanted to go with. He will avoid the captain at any cost. “And what are we buying?”

“You really are clueless, aren’t you?” René answered with a small chuckle. “We’re buying some weapons—for you and Collette—and also some new clothes for you.”

“What’s wrong with what I have on?”

“Nothing. It’s just not very practical if you’re travelling with a band of pirates.”

Not long after, they stumbled into a small shop. A rotten wooden board hung on the door frame. Le Gros Poisson, it read. The Big Fish. The faint creak of the door as it swung open greeted them into the shop. It was colorful and cheery inside, a stark contrast from the shop’s foreboding exterior. There were shelves full of random things, starting from fishing rods and nets, to big knives and even some swords. The items were displayed somewhat neatly along the walls of the wooden cabin, up until the ceiling.

“Ready to make some purchases, do ya?” the shop owner greeted.

One would expect a burly bearded man to own the shop, but it was a lady who greeted them. She had a small stature with long wavy curls as dark as midnight. Her dark skin shone under the oil lamp in the cabin, highlighting her skin perfectly. She smiled a wide, charming smile and welcomed them into the shop.

On another part of the town, not too far away, Baylen and Collette scoured through small shops they passed. They found a blue little brick house with an elegantly painted sign, Stella’s. The house had no door, but instead big glass windows with displays. Upon entering the shop, Collette approached the little displays. There were throwing knives and some revolvers, too. On the other side was a collection of folded travelling clothes and small leather bags perfect for travel.

They heard a thud and a faint groan of pain before a man popped his head out from behind the wooden make-shift counter. He flashed them a wide grin.

“Heya there! What do you need that I can help you with?”

“We were looking for simple travelling clothes,” Baylen briefly explained looking through the stack of folded fabrics. “Preferably ones which can withstand sea water or rough weather.”

“Also some weapons,” Collette added. She took a big knife from the display and tested its weight, swiping it left and right. “This one’s good for me.”

“Well, I have this one!” The shop owner turned to dig into a basket spilling with clothing. He took a step back and lost his footing after stepping on a loose fabric. He fell on his bottom with a yowl of pain. A clumsy one, it seems. He stood and searched some more before pulling out a set of clothing. “This one’s simple enough.”

It was a loose white tunic of medium size with fitted long sleeves. The material was light enough to be worn out in the sun, despite its long sleeves. The pants were loose brown ones made of thin leather. It was strong and durable—Collette even tried to slice the leather with a knife and it didn’t work. Shortly, they made a purchase and were on their way.

The crew met up at the beach by their boat. Remy and René brought a variety of weapons while Baylen and Collette added their other purchases into the pile.

“Alright then,” Baylen finally said. “Before we go, we need to buy some food. Not too much of it, but enough to feed our crew.”

“We still have some left over. We don’t need too much,” René confirmed. “I’ll wait in the boat, guard our things while all three of you can go,”

“No, thank you. I’m staying with René,” Collette said with a tone of finality that no one argued with her as she jumped into the boat. “See you later, you two.”

Remy was ready to protest, but Baylen already towed him along into the town. Baylen would not have a whiny nobleman in his ship—he will have to make Remy complain a little less. It wasn’t long after they find the street market. Rows of fresh fish were displayed on chucks of ice water. They walked past the fishes, to a section of produce. Colorful fruits were put on display on crates lined with hay.

“Which do you want?” Baylen asked the nobleman to Remy’s surprise.

“Um… any is fine by me.”

In the distance, they could hear shouts and yells. It was a sign that a ship had just docked. Some small merchants packed their things and moved closer to the new ship, hoping for new customers.

__________

France, 1860

The odd pair finally set their foot on France. Virgil stretched his body with excitement. He had never left the City of London, let alone the glorious Great Britain. He didn’t know it would feel so liberating when he was finally able to walk on foreign land. Though of course, he didn’t know what he was supposed to do once he got there. He depended on Logan to guide them along their travel. Virgil didn’t speak French after all.

“I really didn’t think things through before,” Logan said to himself, though loud enough for Virgil to hear him.

“What does that mean, smarty?” Virgil asked with an anxious frown. “You’re not making me feel very good right now.”

“I ran out of money,” Logan said as he went through his bag and wallet for extra money. “How did I not think this through before?”

“I’ll get some.”

“No, Virgi—and, he’s gone.”

It had been quite a long journey for them, nearly seven hours on the sea. Fortunately, neither of them was sea sick. The sun had long gone to sleep, the lights replaced by street lamps. Logan looked around, seeing no trace of the oversized coat Virgil wore. He moved deeper inland, trying to find his mischievous companion. There was a market near the shore. There were stacks of crates and fruits everywhere he looked. It was quite different than the market in London. This one seemed to be more organized. Logan was pushed by the cluster of people exiting the ship, so he was forced to move even deeper inland without Virgil. Once he was out of the crowd, he turned his back only for his elbows to accidentally jab a man.

“Oh, je m'excuse,” he said carefully in apology. He bit his cheek lightly, not liking how his French sounded. During his years in school, he had learned many languages. Luckily, French was one of them. “I did not see you there before. Do excuse me.”

“It’s alright,” the man replied casually. He wore a simple white tunic and dark pants, though something about him seemed out of place.

“And while I am here, have you seen a man with a dark-purple coat, messy clothes and dirty shoes?” Logan acquired the man. “He’s my travelling companion.”

“You mean that one?” It was another man who answered. Half his face was covered with a cloth tied behind his head. ‘Odd,’ Logan thought.

Logan followed the man’s gaze, finally spotting Virgil on the side of the street. It was too crowded for him to walk over, so he waved his arm to gain Virgil’s attention. The little thief walked over, showing Logan his hands.

“Scored some,” he said with a smirk, not noticing the two men looking at him with confusion and intrigue. “Go buy the tickets now.”

“Où allez-vous?” one of the men asked to Virgil’s confusion. He had forgotten he will have to speak an entirely different tongue in France. The man lowered the cloth covering his face. “We might be able to help.”

“Well,” Logan started hesitantly, “we’re sailing to America. Would you have any information on which ship we will have to board?”

“I have good news for you, then.”

********** Frenchy French time (correct me if I’m wrong): je m'excuse [I'm sorry; my apology]

Où allez-vous(?) [where are you going/heading(?)]

Prologue Ch 1 Ch 2 Ch 3 Ch 4 Ch 5 Ch 6 Ch 8 Ch 9

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folerdetdufoler · 6 years ago

Photo

sunday was like…a half day. i woke up for breakfast but then went back to bed. i went back through my tweets and apparently i was woken up in the middle of the night by girls being loud in the hallway, so maybe i was just trying to sleep off my grumpiness. i didn’t wake up again until housekeeping came by, and that was enough to knock me out of heaven (bed).

i went to meet haidee at KB for second breakfast. it was one of my grosser walks, because it was raining and warm out, so i was either getting wet from the outside or sweating through my layers on the inside. on top of literally dripping on my stool at the cafe, i was trying to save a seat for haidee too, and that was making me sweat double time because i always feel like no one believes me when i say “i have a friend coming.” like, i have friends? really? hmmm. anyway, she arrived and we got caught up.

and phew, i thought my saturday was rough with all of the walking? haidee’s saturday, starting late friday night, was…not good. ugh. i felt so bad that she went through so much, and that i couldn’t be there to help fix it or let her escape from it. it’s frustrating that she was subjected to a lot of very bad decisions made by other people, and doubly so that my first instinct was to try to fix it, even though none of it was my fault. i wanted to publicly rant on her behalf, shame others for their bad behavior, but that wasn’t going to fix anything either, so we just unloaded and commiserated for a few hours, and tried our best to figure out how to handle that sort of thing going forward. in the very least, it was good to talk, rather than let the disappointment fester in silence.

since i was in the neighborhood i had wanted to make a quick stop at nissen to see the bench in the light, and make haidee take another picture on the bench with me. but siv actually walked into the cafe and chatted with us briefly, explaining that the convention was still running late and the safaris hadn’t wrapped up at the school on time. i was relieved then that i hadn’t dragged haidee up there, nor gone on my own, so we stayed inside and waited for her other friend (i want to call her vee but i also know that that is wrong) to arrive. i ordered an iced mocha and cinnamon roll, which, because i’m obsessed with myself, seemed cute since it was isak’s regular order in mondays. i started drinking iced mochas when i kept seeing kaylee rave about them, so that’s what made me choose it for isak, and a cinnamon bun is a cinnamon bun. [bread pun]

at some point nadège was walking past with her tour group and she ran up to knock on the window and in that moment i understood how isak was feeling right here:

haidee’s friend showed up and we all crowded into isak’s window for a bit. then i excused myself to go meet jenn in grünerløkka. i can’t remember who told me about it first, whether it was mo back in january or haidee in june, but retrolykke came highly recommended, so we met there. on the barista’s recommendation jenn had tea and i had water, because my “caffeine headache” wasn’t going away so i was probably just dehydrated. we sat outside because it was still kind of warm and i’m glad we did because i probably would’ve spent all of my money if we were sat anywhere near a shelf in that joint. we traded stories about our saturdays and i got the run down on the movie i missed. then, unable to hide it any longer, i let loose my deep desire to ride the ferris wheel at the christmas market. maybe i played it cool, but that’s unlikely. we had a small window before we had to meet haidee for dinner, so we cleaned up and zipped over there.

cheers to the people who let you indulge in your secret wishes, who help you buy a ticket and climb into the bucket with you. cheers to the young girls in our bucket (is there a different word for it? gondola? whatever. it felt like a bucket swinging from a giant’s hand) who probably thought we were weird but weren’t too afraid to ask jenn to take their picture. cheers to oslo and its shit weather, which it still wore beautifully. this bitch looks great from any angle.

after the ride we wandered around the market because haidee reported her event was (newsflash) running late and they were still waiting outside. i was getting another low, so i had to stop to get something to eat. what i should’ve done was just stop and chomp some tablets, but my mind was foggy and i was with someone else so i was like obviously we need to get gløgg first. i stared down the candy apples by the register, which would’ve been the next smartest choice for fast-acting sugar, but i ordered a goddamn pølse instead, and we proceeded to make dick jokes for another fifteen minutes while i housed it in like, five bites.

now, i need to explain something that i think has just been rolling around in the back of my mind since february, but i’m mildly obsessed with the idea of pølse as a party food, a common snack. i don’t know why, of all the norwegian things i’ve encountered, this sticks out for me, because…it’s a hot dog. americans eat hot dogs all the time. it is not an unfamiliar concept. but after seeing marlon eating one at the club i’ve projected that onto every possible party situation in my head, from a tiny gathering in a home to a giant dance floor with lasers shooting out across a crowd. and it just makes me laugh? and i feel like i need to explain why or how, but i actually can’t. just…dick jokes aside, ordering a hot dog was funny to me, and i wanted to experience that hot-dog-in-da-club feeling, so maybe that’s why i went with protein and slow carbs instead of straight sugar. i prioritized my sense of humor over my health, and while it was dumb it made me laugh and tasted good. that doesn’t explain my obsession with pølse but i think it tells you a lot about me.

okay so after that…we took shelter in a KB because it was still raining and we were still waiting and i was still low. then i finally got smart and started eating my tablets. we made our way over to ett bord where we were picking up haidee, but they were still finishing up. jenn sat at the table outside and narrated what was going on inside because i refused to turn around. i was hoping, like a child who hadn’t learned what object permanence was, that if i didn’t see anything, then nothing was happening. or if the people inside didn’t see me, then i didn’t exist. but i don’t think it worked. ragnar came out to say hi to jenn, and that was cool to see him again. we scooped nadège and haidee and i tried to escape unseen, but fuck…like a minute later we ran into three italians and walked with them up to the intersection. that’s what the blurry photo is, nadège and rocco, federico and jenn in front of them. at that point i was ready to just give up, because like, of course i was going to intersect with these people eventually. i was literally visiting places related to the show and convention. i don’t know why i thought it was avoidable, why i had shaped my trip around trying not to see these people, while also putting myself directly in their line of fire. i’d met henrik and lisa and there were the italians and i had a goodie bag in my backpack and you probably wouldn’t actually believe me at this point if i said i didn’t attend the convention. my desire and my shame shuttled me around the city, working together, telling me you can’t have your cake and eat it too. so i took a picture of it.

i was able to relax though, through dinner with jenn and haidee at olivia. we ended up at the wrong location (tjulvhomen instead of aker brygge) because i decided to ignore jenn’s directions (nice) but they were pretty empty so we just stayed. since i had already caught up with both of them i took this opportunity to let them talk to each other, which left me free to shove every strand of linguini known to man into my face. you only get a photo of my dessert, which marks the first point in time that i stopped eating long enough to actually take a picture.

it was interesting talking to both of them about the movie because they were literally in the same room, watching the same thing, but had such different interpretations and responses to it. on top of that, being in a room filled with the skam fandom must have shaped their viewing as well. even though i didn’t experience any of it, the discussion alone was a great reminder of the variety of perspectives in the fandom and what happens when a fandom is the lens through which you view the world.

we of course talked about skam and fandom, but we also got to talk about our personal lives a bit more, and i think this was the first time i was in a completely non-skam-related place, which seemed to free us a bit from reference points that kept your subconscious attached to the show or cast (at least it did for me). i had spent my day avoiding it, and but now i was actually distanced from it without any effort, and it felt like a really positive development. especially as i’m attempting to be a better person in general, able to establish and maintain relationships that aren’t based precariously on a singular, mutual fixation. i want to be able to be friends with people because they’re good people and a joy to be around, not just because there’s this one thing we can talk about. now here’s a joke line because i always undercut my serious emotions with humor: look ma, we talked about something else!

then jenn had to get to a party, so we had another navigational ~experience~. we dropped her off there and haidee and i decided to head home. our days were short but like, emotionally very long, so we were done. that didn’t stop us from standing on the sidewalk in the rain, talking for another hour though. we kept hugging to say goodbye and then talking some more and hugging again and talking and ok for the last time now because there are puddles inside my shoes kiss kiss squeeze i’m not crying it’s the rain i swear. i’ll see you in september, okay? promise.

i finished the day as it started, with a very wet walk. the market was empty, so i let myself take the kinds of photos that i am too embarrassed to take in public, the ones where you stand wherever you’d like for optimal angles and don’t care about anyone else around you, don’t worry about being in their way, or worry that they can tell how many pictures you’re taking, or worry that they’re judging how poorly your shots are turning out. ugh, it’s amazing that i can function as a tourist full stop. please sir, would you mind emptying out the city so i may experience it without the anxiety of my human existence? tusen takk.

whatever. i got to the hotel, asked for a new room key (at some point that evening i lost my room key and my ruter card, rip), returned to heaven (bed) and promptly shit my pants again when i saw the announcement on twitter about the bloopers.

the motherfucking bloopers. the man, the myth, the legend. the rumors were true.

#for the record i have never literally shit my pants #i have a 100% success rate with using a toilet #but it's the only turn of phrase i can think of when i try to describe my very physical uncontrollable reaction to certain things #like what is this #what is happening #am i shitting my pants #or am i just so obsessed with a show that the mere hint of news causes me to lose control of my bodily functions?#kerryinoslo

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seasaltmemories · 6 years ago

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celica alm cooking fluff plssssssssss

Celica’s calves burned from the walk up the stairs to her apartment. She had told herself she should exercise more and taking the stairs instead of the elevator was an easy first step, but after a long day of working late, her body was regretting that decision. As soon as let herself in, she kicked her heels off to the side, and peeled off the rest of her sweaty clothing until she was down to her underwear. After running across the city and back in the hot sun, all she wanted to do was take a shower and then collapse into bed. Tomorrow was going to be just as strenuous, so there was no need to drag today out any longer, even if that phone-call still hung in her mind.

However, before she could make it to the bathroom, she noticed the tv in the living room was still on. As she went to turn it off she found Alm asleep on the couch. Strange, he wasn’t the type watch much tv and doze off. Figuring he’d prefer to sleep in his own bed, she nudged him gently.

“Mmhm?” Alm groaned as he lifted his head. “Celica?”

“It’s me,” Up close, she noticed the stains lining his t-shirt and a glob of something smattered across the bridge of his nose. Knowing him, Gray and the rest of the gang must have dragged him into something stupid, but that would be a story to hear another day. “You should wash up and get to bed.”

Slowly he began to sit up, stretching his limbs out like he was a cat. “What time is it?”

“11:00pm. Don’t worry, I’m gonna be joining you soon.”

Immediately his head snapped towards her, suddenly alert and lively. “Ah! Good then I didn’t miss it! Follow me!” Before she could protest, he had already grabbed her hand and dragged her to the kitchen. “Ta da!” With a flourish he flicked the light-switch. “Happy Birthday!”

Sitting on the counter was a plastic cake container with a note proclaiming the same cheery message. If it had been any other day she would at least appreciate the effort, but after everything that had happened, she couldn’t mask her disappointment.

“Alm...we talked about this.” It had been bad enough having to spoil Mae and Boey’s attempt at a surprise lunch date. “I just don’t really have the time for--” She tried to search for the right words, but ended up coming up blank. “--that.” She gestured at the container.

Alm ran a hand through his hair “I know you didn’t want to celebrate, but I thought something simpler could help make the festivities go down a bit easier. So what if it isn’t a birthday cake, just one I happened to make this afternoon? We can save it for tomorrow if you’re really too tired.”

In the light she could see it was flour that had gotten all over his clothes and face. Considering the evening out together he had originally planned, Alm really was trying to meet her on her level. It wasn’t like she disliked her birthday, but with her polling and research running her more ragged than usual on top of the other normal stresses of life, she felt as if she physically couldn’t relax, that if left doing nothing for too long she would snap and lash out at those just wanting to help her and ruin everything.

Without warning, her stomach let loose a loud growl. When she did the math in her head, she realized she hadn’t had any food since her quick lunch at 3.

“I guess one slice wouldn’t hurt.”

Alm’s smile was so bright, she thought it might blind her in that moment. “Sounds great! One slice coming up!” With a flourish he removed the top...

...and revealed the saddest cake she had ever seen. She hadn’t expected any homemade effort to be professional quality, but what frosting had managed to stay on the cake seemed to double its height. The poor thing couldn’t even stand up straight.

She couldn’t help. Immediately she broke in an ugly laugh, so hard she buried her face in her hands in an attempt to keep some measure of dignity.

“Hey! I worked very hard on it!” Alm scowled, but he couldn’t hide the flush slowly creeping up his neck.

“I know you did, honey. I appreciate it, truly,” She leaned forward to kiss his cheek. “What matters the most is that it tastes good.”

Back in highschool, when imagining the grand and ambitious life she’d have once she left home, Celica hadn’t picture herself eating an ugly slice of cake in her underwear at midnight. But as Alm and she ate (it actually turned out to taste pretty decent) something in her slowly began to still. Ugh, somehow she always managed to forget just how much slowing down helped her, even when every bone in her body screamed not to. Funny how humans were like that. Repeating the same mistakes over and over again. Really she was a pro at it. But instead of beating herself over it, she tried to focus on the way Alm’s thumb skimmed over her knuckles. It was harder to lose her head with him anchoring her.

When they both finished, Alm moved to put the cake up, but before he could leave, she squeezed his hand.

“Hmm?” He raised an eyebrow. With the way that flour was still caked across the bridge of his nose, she couldn’t help but smile and lean forward to wipe it off.

“Dad texted me today.”

Alm muttered something under his breath, yet from the way his grip tighten around her she knew more or less what he said.

“I thought you had blocked that bastard’s number?”

“And changed mine since the last time he pulled this stunt.” Celica massaged the side of her temple with her free hand. “But he must have been using his latest girlfriend’s phone bc I didn’t recognize the number and thought it might be one of the priests I’ve scheduled to interview. And once I started reading....it was like a train-wreck, couldn’t look away no matter how much I wanted to.”

“What’d he say?”

“The same old about not being sure about how much time he has left,” She sighed as she pulled at a loose string. It always felt like she pouring salt in an exposed wound right after she thought it had closed. “And he tried to worm his way into getting an invitation to the wedding.”

Alm let go of his hand to cup her face, his thumb stroking her cheek gently. “Cel...don’t feel like you have to forgive him just it’s what you’re “supposed” to do. You shouldn’t have to sacrifice your special day for other people’s happiness. Least of all, his.”

“Oh the guilt is definitely there, but I feel like I’m handling it better,” Despite her light pitch the bitterness steeped through all the same. “Rather it feels like I have no choice. If he was able to get my number he can probably figure out where its gonna be and invite myself. I feel tied to being his daughter no matter what I do.”

Alm bit his lip--a common habit for when he was frustrated. One one hand it was touching to see him emphasize so much with her, but on the other she hated making him suffer.

“I called my therapist about it. When I get around to my next session we’ll be ready to tackle it.”

“Doesn’t make me want to try and fix everything any less,” Alm pulled away, fists clenching and unclenching. This was an old song and dance for them, yet that didn’t ease the pain a bit. “You know I’m always willing to do whatever I can.”

“And I love you for that.” It was Celica’s turn to stroke his arm. Truly even this meant the world to her. “It doesn’t help that he offered to cover expenses. Almost makes me want to tolerate him just so that money isn’t stuck sitting in his trust funds and--”

“--Celica, I would never ask that of you.” Green eyes bore into her soul. “I feel awful that you’ve had to be working yourself to death for me, but I promise once I pass the bar exam, things will get easier for both of us.”

She took that moment to study Alm closely, to really observe the man she would dedicate herself to in the matter of a few months and the worry that lined his face. My my in moments like this she could trace out the boy she first met, who had been doing his damnest to befriend the lonely, rich girl.

“Look at us--” Celica gestured from her underwear, to the cake, then to the rest of the apartment, at a lost of what to say. “--just...tripping over each to see who can do the most for the other. I thought it was my job to overthink things.”

“We’re both the professional types,” Alm ran a hand through his hair. “Professional disasters for now but one day we might get prompted on up to professional mess.”

“It will be quite exciting won’t it?” Celica laughed. The memories swarmed before her eyes, of the two of them sharing their dreams during homecoming, imagining the world that would wait for them once they left their small town. They had managed to survive high school together and even made it through undergrad all while thousands of miles apart. The fact they made it this far would have blown her fourteen year-old mind.

“Hey, don’t worry about saving the world, Superman.” This time she pressed a kiss to his nose. “Just be my Clark Kent.” Even with no clear solution to her father, the wedding, or tomorrow’s long hours, her shoulders still as if some of the weight had been lifted.

“Eh not sure if I can ever give up on the world,” From the faraway look in his eye, he must have been reliving the past just like her. “but you think it’s ok for now?”

The same tired side of her was ready to insist everything was fine, that she had to rush to bed so she could rush all tomorrow again. However its tiredness seemed to have drained even her own weariness.

“Can we cuddle for a bit?” She felt like a teen voicing such a desire. “We’ve been out of sync with our schedule for a while now, and I’ve really missed it.”

Without another word, Alm wrapped her in his arms. As Celica rested her head against his heart, she knew that everything they’ve been through would have all been worth it just to have this moment.

A.N. Idk if I know how to fluff anymore, so some hurt/comfort as much as it got away from the prompt I am just happy to finish something

#fire emblem echoes #celicalm #celica fire emblem #alm fire emblem #fe echoes #my lame writing #otp: I'll send a storm to capture your heart and bring you home #ships and deserts and swamps oh my #celica #alm #Anonymous

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yoolee · 7 years ago

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If lee wrote otome | #2 - Boss

The Heroine (MC)

CEO MC: Never gets enough sleep, which makes her sarcastic but is also semi her own fault given the amount of caffeine she consumes. Sort of obsessive about long-term planning, unwaveringly believes that a company’s value comes from its employees and will choose them over shareholder dividends every time. Determined to run an ethical company even if it means it’s not the most profitable company. Super duper Type A – aggressive and fearless because she has to be. Sometimes really just wants a cupcake in her hand and a cat in her lap, but then she’s bored and goes back to business planning. Creative risk-taker, decent negotiator. Smart enough to know where she needs help and hire people who can do the things she can’t (or, more to the point, doesn’t want to do). Gets back up every time. Will definitely fight you. Might feel bad about it later but only if someone reminds her it happened.

Love Interests

The BARISTA: Peppy, optimist (or so MC thinks) but it turns out they actually switch up their personality depending on who they’re serving (sometimes they are the chill, hipster philosopher, sometimes they are the rude New York get-it-done eye roller, etc.) actually somewhere in the middle of it all – but really IS an optimist despite themselves. Kind of slippery and hard to pin down. Big family, used to being what their other siblings/parents need from them. Fairly certain CEO MC is headed for an early heart attack with the amount of espresso she imbibes. Probably an author. Maybe an ex-broadway personjust because. IDK.

The PR LAWYER: Worked-three-jobs-put-self-through-college story. Patience, tact, good at calming people down. Detail oriented, a little fussy about appearances. Perennially exasperated by CEO (Please don’t promise to have a cure for cancer In the next three years with no data to back it up. No, you can’t punch the reporter for being a dick. Look, I know you WANT to donate 100% of proceeds to charity but please pick a friendlier one than ‘punch reporters in the face foundation’ that’s not gonna fly) never gets enough sleep. Has a key to MC’s house so they can come yell at her for making their life difficult at whatever hour of the night she insists on doing so. Is on MC’s speed-dial, which means they also get called to DD, though they’d rather not.

FLAKY MODEL(s?): Trust fund kid? Pretty face? Floats through life? The sort of person who will get on the wrong subway train and then just ride it all day people-watching never mind that they had an appointment six hours ago. Pose with a boa constrictor? Sure, as long as it’s being treated humanely. Tarantula on the face? Awwww, it’s fuzzyyyyy. No filter, no worries. Probably drags CEO MC along on a Caribbean shoot and PR Lawyer has to call and yell because that does not look good, okay? And poor MC is like, I thought we were getting a drink and model is like WE ARE we are getting tropical coconut water from the SOURCE here oh wait I don’t know how to drink out of a coconut…who knows why they are attracted to CEO MC, probably because she’s there and sticks around and no one else does. Human puppy dog.

CHAIRMAN OF THE BOARD: young hotshot venture capitalist, thinks CEO MC is a bleeding heart (your employees do not need that many sick days, lost productivity blah blah blah why do we need a daycare onsite that’s a waste of shareholder money), kind of a math whiz, naturally lucky, doesn’t get along with family (gambling problem in the fam – which manifests in him in investment risks and unresolved issues) butts heads constantly with MC, frequently tries to get her fired – in part because his attempts to do so get her fired up and she does great things, which ultimately is better for the company than when she’s just doing her normal ‘good’ job. She is going to be royally ticked when she figures that out. Manipulative, but relatively benign under it all. The sort of person who smirks instead of smiles. All the time.

CHEF FROM HER FAVORITE RESTAURANT: Also a CEO though on smaller scale, because, running a restaurant IS running a business. Probably under the impression CEO MC is actually like, a graduate student with no money because she tends to get takeout at weird hours. Gruff, grumpy, abrupt, but heart of gold. Basically—will grumble about you coming in late but will add extra veggies to your pasta because you’re looking a little pale and need the nutrients and if you call them on it will snarl that they had to be used up they were going bad and he wasn’t going to waste extra, expensive, PROTEIN on you. (MC asks them out and then realizes the only nice restaurant she knows is the one the chef owns)

PRESCHOOL TEACHER: JUST A DECENTLY NICE PERSON. Checks in to make sure MC has eaten regularly, staying hydrated, needs anything fixed around the house (she can do her own plumbing but doesn’t like the electrical and hey it’s nice to have company). Good with kids. Maybe divorced and wanted them but ex-spouse didn’t? idk. Calm, not easily ruffled, sweet as pie, except when he’s playing video games and suddenly MC understands how he can get through the day without any aggression – he unleashes it on fictional zombies. Blissfully normal, all things considered.

PERSONAL TRAINER: “fine, whatever, EAT THE DANG CHEESE if you’re just going to ignore my nutritional advice we’re doing ten more reps” athletic, happiest when DOING versus saying or reading or sitting. Not as impulsive as you’d guess at first glance, because they tend to use working out as a meditative time to make decisions. Didn’t finish college because they realized they just didn’t enjoy it, but they did enjoy working with student athletes, which is how they got into training. Enviably fit. Wants to expand the gym so wheedles business advice out of MC in exchange for not harassing her about her tendency to drink coffee instead of water (she insists it has water IN it, it should count) not particularly intimidated by her, which is a pleasant change of pace.

Supporting Cast (non LIs)

ADMINISTRATIVE ASSISTANT: Keeps MC sane, has her back, schedules everything. Good at details, even better at smiling at angry people and making them not-angry through sheer force of sunny personality (actually a ruse, MC is convinced she’s actually the most delightfully evil person ever, but like some kind of fairy tale where when you acknowledge the thing it goes away, refuses to ever dive into figuring out). Older than the MC because we need to stop making middle aged women invisible in stories?? Sometimes has to remind MC of how much she does by holding silent protests (in part why MC thinks she is secretly a supervillain in the making) which are always, always successful.

PARENT COMPANY ADMIN ASSISTANT: Bane of MC’s existence. Smarmy, smily pain in the tush.

CFO: We have put in an official request with the company credit card management to start declining purchases at that coffee shop you go to, no this is not negotiable, it’s not in the budget anymore drink so darn water woman. Completely willing to go toe-to-toe with MC, meetings often involve a lot of yelling, but they’re always productive and no hard feelings.

CIO: Serpent-y, but not in a bad way. Just a very cool-tempered person, very contained, very guarded, very introverted. Never happy when she has to do presentations, so super willing to share knowledge with MC so she does it instead (she is not a great teacher, kind of judgey and shows her frustration when MC doesn’t ‘get’ it right away, but very brilliant, and there’s no malice in the judgement, just no filter). Extremely logic-oriented and process-oriented over people-oriented. Picks up and assess tech very quickly, and good at finding affordable, fast solutions.

RANDOM MARKETING EMPLOYEE: Set up to be a villain but is actually like gung-ho on MC’s side. Literally an ex pageant queen, went to college on scholarship from it. Out of the workforce for awhile as a stay at home mom when her kids were young, but picks up the new trends fast. Now a single mother, so will literally fight the chairman if he tries to take away the company daycare. Some days uses the ‘people see a pretty face and assume no brain’ to her advantage, some days it wears her out. Unofficially drinking buddy with MC, even though they both feel weird about it given the fact MC is technically boss’s boss’s boss.

BARTENDER: also an ex-girlfriend maybe? Current best friend? Who she turns to when the barista cuts her off from coffee and the chef’s restaurant is already closed. Sharp-tongued, bristly, generally disgusted with MC’s six inch heels and slacks in her leather-jacket, cigar smoke bar. Like lady, you’re lost. Probably on the mob payroll at some point in her life.

ROUTE PLOTS:

(Chairman route?) MERGER – company has just bought another company, which is a major risk move for CEO (can only be one, so do you keep the old one on as a VP? Do you let them go? Will they be bitter/try to sabotage you?) you have to fend off internal sabotage, get everything running smoothly without either company falling apart in the process.

(PR Lawyer route?) Parent company did something massively shady and it’s tainting your company’s name too, so you have to scrounge to avoid having to fire half your employees and keep the company alive.

(Model route?) New product launch – hence why models are entering the picture. It’s a new business venture in the sense it’s targeted at a completely new audience your company hasn’t catered to before.

(Personal Trainer route?) Company is in its infancy, hugely risky time, and you’re doing everything you can to ensure it’s a success (maybe including putting your own salary back into it, which means you can’t afford PT so they agree to work with you as long as you give them business advice)

FROM @han-pan- they keep trying to buy new retail space for the gym and MC keeps buying it instead because it’s SUCH GOOD PROPERTY and they sort of exasperatedly are like ugh fine whatever you owe me since you keep swiping prime spots out from under my nose

See the rest here

#if lee wrote otome

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cominguptulips · 3 years ago

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It's very frustrating.

It's raining really hard right now, as we speak. I hope my cat is okay.

I'm only at day 11 of the challenge and I'm already so tired. they always say that I should be patient, it'll come to me, and that I just have to trust the process but it's easier said than done. I don't remember what my weight was before starting to work out again (I DID weigh myself and take my measurements but that was BEFORE the whole 'Sydney Cummings' fiasco) but I think, I think that it was around 43.9. now, I weigh around 43.5 so, I lost 4 pounds in the span of 11 days. I guess that's not too bad with maybe some considering that to be fast. but I'm just so dissatisfied. I know I've mentioned this in my previous entry but I really feel like I could do so much more to speed the process up.

knowing myself, I just know that I'll be so frustrated with the new changes that I'll be putting in my routine as the new school year comes around. and in true sophie fashion, I'll end up saying "ahh, fuck it. I'll start again once summer comes around" I chose Chloe Ting's workout (after this program I'll start using her other programs) because they were feasible and I could see myself doing her workouts on a daily basis as the new school year rolls in. with that being said, I really don't think that I have any other way but to just suck it up and accept the fact that I may not be able to reach my fitness goals within the timeframe that I wanted. but you know what, I would rather choose that than succumb to my ridiculous, perfectionist ways. I can no longer be that "all or nothing" person. well, at least in terms of health.

today was supposed to be my "rest day" on my rest days, I complete my "10k steps a day" goal. I'm more flexible in terms of that particular goal. hitting less than 10k steps during my rest days doesn't send me into an existential panic, like the one that I'm having right now. except it did, today. I only took 5k something steps today. ugh. just thinking about makes me feel like another wrinkle is forming on my forehead. but the last straw was doing my usual grocery runs. Yep, I know you've already seen this coming. yes, I did spend a little more than I anticipated. that combined with my failure to complete my 10k steps goal is what really pushed me to write today's entry. what a shitty silver lining, no offense. I guess, in good news, I have more food options than I did 4 hours ago. but now, I have to figure out a way to really starting to save money for marcy's food but also for my actual savings.

to compensate, I'll be completing my 10k steps goal tomorrow and I'll also be withdrawing last month's savings.

as far as my coding adventure, I haven't properly started learning Javascript yet. that is yet another situation that's really giving my cortisol a run for its money. I'm not saying that I regret learning C# first but I wish that I had learned Phyton or JavaScript first. I learned that Javascript, HTML, and CSS are the main components of front-end developing. I'm still not sure if front-end developing is something that I see myself doing for the next 50 something years but it's apparently the easiest. AND contrary to popular belief, web developing jobs pay as much as software engineering jobs do so that's something that I really ought to think about. still, the ultimate dream, obviously is to get into a FAANG company. Google would have to be my top pick but I don't mind working for the rest either way. so yes, I would have to learn JavaScript, HTML, and CSS first and foremost. those 3 languages are my top priority.

I've been seeing these "How I became a software engineer/web developer without a computer science degree" videos a lot too. but it's not making me feel (well, maybe just a little) doubtful of my decision to switch courses. I am however still thinking about whether to switch Universities or not. I don't know if I'll be able to take the pressure of my current university so, it's something that I really have to think about.

I'm not gonna fail computer science. I know I won't. I'll be finishing this course with flying colors. just wait and you'll see.

I'm allowed to feel anxious about my future but I would not let that come into my way of reaching my goals.

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battystumutchildren-blog · 7 years ago

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RYAN: -back at it again at the silvah dollah. it's kinda nice to have someplace new to stalk around the later hours of the day. she knows it's not exactly advisable for various reasons to transportalize out onto the satelite isolated far from her home. but... whatever. it's comfortable here and finding comfort elsewhere, somewhere more familiar, is a difficult task for her.-

RYAN: -she's hanging out at the counter again, poking at the remaining contents of a strawberry milkshake and being far less chatty than she was yesterday.-

SILVAH: -Given that there's not really much ON this station other than Skaianet research facilities, private research facilities and basically....the one resturaunt at least there's not much trouble Ryan can get up to up here. Silvah is just finishing cleaning and restoring his stocks from last night. He stayed up far too late and got a little drunk himself, but he's in good spirits. He's fairly sure the reopening was rousing success and that he's gonna make back the money he spent on the deck. Big man is boppin with the radio as he works until he finally makes his way back behind the counter and sees Ryan there. His fins flick.-

SILVAH: Blondie!

SILVAH: I thought I made a regular outta you.

RYAN: -perks up, immediately putting on a smile when she hears his voice, but it's definitely half hearted.-

RYAN: naturally??? youve got some great vibes going on here. :blush:

SILVAH: I built it that way babycakes, but that don't mean it ain't nice to hear.

SILVAH: -starts restocking the baked goods displays as they chitchat.-

SILVAH: You had some pretty good vibes yourself last night. -Not so much today though, huh? He's peepin on her.-

RYAN: again. naturally! as a new regular youll soon discover im always the life of the party. :wink: -leans on the counter, chin in her hand.- SILVAH: That's quite a claim. Maybe I should think about buyin a leaderboard. Huh huh.

SILVAH: Sure are cute though. Feel like I should be payin you to sit there and look pretty.

RYAN: well im not about to turn down that offer. :hugging:

RYAN: ive got a pretty lengthy resume as a professional cutie. you wouldnt regret the decision.

SILVAH: Now, now. I'm not totally sold. You strike me as a troublemaker too.

SILVAH: Acutally now that I'm thinkin about it, the round robin never made it to ya.

SILVAH: What's your story?

RYAN: :scream:

RYAN: its not polite to ask a lady such questions...

RYAN: which is definitely NOT something a troublemaker would say. :thinking: SILVAH: Keepin it close to the vest I see. That's fine. I'll get it out of ya eventually.

SILVAH: Food is great at makin people talk. RYAN: -chinhands intensifies.- yeah? what do you find is the best thing to feed a person to get them to share their life story? SILVAH: Somethin' caffeinated.

SILVAH: I'll tell you what- I'm crossin strawberry milkshakes off the list as of today.

RYAN: -giggles. geez... it feels good to laugh.-

RYAN: okay fine. youve fed me enough lines to change my tune. :stuck_out_tongue:

RYAN: youre right about me... i am a troublemaker. but im trying to cut back these days. SILVAH: -Seems satisfied at getting her to laugh. And to crack.-

SILVAH: Respect, little lady. It's not easy.

SILVAH: I'm also one of those.

RYAN: yeah? what are your vices?

RYAN: mine incluuuuude... -checks them off on her fingers as she says them in an attempt to keep it light.- running away. all manner of narcotics. and beautiful sad men and women that only break your heart.

RYAN: so you know. the standard really.

SILVAH: You're right. That is a hell of a resume. -Scratches under his fat chin with Robut hand.-

SILVAH: Lesee....I'm right there with ya on runnin away. Dissapointin my family. Sexual deviancy. An you may have noticed that I like to eat a lil bit.

SILVAH: We already got the makins of a pretty good country song. Too bad that's not my favorite genre.

RYAN: hehehe. id love to inspire any kinda song really.

RYAN: but other than that it seems weve got a lot in common. -sips milkshake.-

RYAN: ive been... disappointing a lot of people for a long time. but i feel like i really dropped the fucking ball again recently. :weary:

SILVAH: -Now he's got both fins angled towards her.- You wanna get into it?

SILVAH: Don't gotta. But if you feel like you need to I have time.

SILVAH: That's how I got so fat. I'm full of secrets.

RYAN: -snickers and shrugs, swirling the straw around in the glass thoughtfully.- well... guess theres no harm in it.

RYAN: since youre being so nice and charming. :wink:

RYAN: things have just been... i dunno.

RYAN: first i fell off the wagon.

RYAN: definitely disappointed my family... and probably my boyfriend. or like. whatever our deal even is. -sighs.-

RYAN: then my ex comes along and starts pulling some burn book bullshit... spilling all my secrets. pissing off my friends. making aforementioned romantic relationship all the more complicated. i think.

RYAN: ugh. -just sighs. it's hard to really dig deep when it's all so frustrating, so she just kinda slumps a little.-

SILVAH: Mm. Did ya say some things you regret?

RYAN: -nods slowly, pouting a little.-

RYAN: yeah. so much stupid shit.

RYAN: im trying to fix things but... i dont know--

RYAN: i dont know what im doing half the time.

SILVAH: -Pauses for a minuite, and while he's processing all the vibes he's picking up from her he's making himself look busy, which is something he's pretty practiced at by now.-

SILVAH: It's not the easy route. It's easier to keep cuttin out. Start over somewhere where they don't know ya. But that would be a waste in the long run.

SILVAH: If you keep tryin eventually they'll see the effort and appreciate it. Even if you're graspin at straws and you say all the wrong shit. RYAN: -peers up at him, finding that answer... strangely comforting. she gets the sense he understands. maybe because of his own experiences, or just because he's used to dealing with sad sacks like her. it was kind of a cliche. in any case, she's quiet for a moment as she thinks it all over too. her voice is a little hushed when she does speak, a bit embarrassed by admitting the things she is... but knowing full well she needs to say it.-

RYAN: i feel like my efforts are pushing him away.

RYAN: alienating him cuz he feels guilty too. hes always stuck in his own head.

RYAN: i think he feels like hes not good enough. but i dont really get it. im the one who kept running away.

RYAN: he never did anything wrong. at least i dont think he did. it just-- a shitty time. and i dunno if its ever gonna pass so long as im around to remind him that-- fuck.

RYAN: -puts her head in her hand with a sigh.- sorry im not making sense anymore.

SILVAH: -Frowns as he takes this in, and at the same time takes in extra information. All her good intentions, the desperation that go along with them.- Y'know most of the time tryin to anticipate what someone's gonna do or why they feel the way they feel is real misleadin. Unless you have a real blunt discussion about it, you could never know. You might've fucked up, but it don't mean every bad thing that person's feelin is your fault.

SILVAH: The stuff you can pin down as yours is what you should concentrate on, is what I'm sayin.

RYAN: -peers up from behind her hand, eyes glossy with sadness but... there's some hope too. she laughs a little, trying not to seem too broken up about the stuff going on in her head.-

RYAN: i hear you.

RYAN: i just...

RYAN: wanna know im making someone happy for once.

RYAN: you know?

SILVAH: -She seems so vulnerable, it almost hurts to look. They're barely acquaintances at this point, but he doesn't care, he's gonna lightly reach out and touch her hand with his non robotic one.- You got yourself a super acheivable goal there, blondie. I think you're gonna be ok.

SILVAH: -Backs it up with a warm smile too. Believe him. He belives in you!-

RYAN: -well... it's hard not to smile when it feels like someone believes in you. and for some reason, in this moment she kind of believes it too. she doesn't mind the touch. she welcomes it in fact, feeling a little bit touch starved lately.-

RYAN: ill definitely be okay if i keep coming back for these milkshakes...

SILVAH: Hah! You think I'm gonna let you keep orderin just milkshakes.

SILVAH: -Pats her hand, gives it a gentle little squeeze and then releases her.-

RYAN: -giggles again. what a big softie...- i thought the customer was always right???? rude ass...

SILVAH: -Laughs with her. Huh huh huh.- I'mma personally fight whoever came up with that horse shite. The customer ain't right even half the time, let alone always.

SILVAH: This is the only place in the goddamn world where I control everythin. It ain't a fuckin democracy.

RYAN: -snorts and then full on cackles.- geez!!! then i guess ill have to refer to your expert opinion every day im here. :wink:

SILVAH: Heh heh. S'long as its real food some of the time I'll be a happy clam.

#ryan strider #silvah balila #the silvah dollah #ip log #ic

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kawaiianimeredhead · 8 years ago

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some rambling about my dogs that may lose some stream and sense part way through but right now I’m kind of annoyed and frustrated and a bit tired

So I have two other dogs beside Mackenzie who I know I’ve posted about a couple of times but yeah it’s really off balanced the way I speak about them and her

Many many years ago, somewhere (at a guess) around the tail end of elementary school to maybe around middle school, so roughly...10 ish or slight more years ago we had a single chihuahua named scooby who was an inside dog until we got a second chihuahua named Sparkles. Scooby was pretty well house trained and beyond that I’m not sure what else he knew or not because my memory is shit. But while we had Sparkles she of course took some time to house train and during that time she’d have accidents inside and at some point scooby also started to have accidents outside.

now in my memory is was one accident but maybe it was more, regardless this pissed off my dad and both dogs were put outside in the backyard. There’s a small but large dog house and a concrete area and a lot of grass for them and it’s all fenced in. Some time after that Sparkles got pregnant, this happened several times and she had three or four litters and about four dogs that survived total (since she’s a smaller dog four didn’t make it) and out of those we kept two of them. Lady, who’s from her first litter, and Flower, who’s from her last.

Over the years there was a decent amount of interaction between me and the chihuahuas, we had a trampoline back there and a pool in the summer and so me and my friend would mess around with them but as I got older and became less and less interested in being outside and the pool stopped going up and the trampoline broke, I pretty much interacted very little with them.

I was and have been the predominate feeder of them tho so I did see them almost every day. Which is better than my parents, especially my mom, who rarely go in the back yard or feed them unless I can not. For a while this didn’t really bother me, it’s just how things went. I didn’t really play with my dogs, but I loved and cared about them a lot and saw them pretty often. But as I got a bit older and they got a bit older this started to get really frustrating to me. But ngl I still didn’t actively go out and play with them beyond bringing food

Now I honestly can’t rememeber most of the time, we have semi-regular vet appointments for them, I have no idea how often they happen but I’m sure it’s once a year at least. And eventually their healths started not being so great. We never cut their nails so they would regularly come in with rather long nails and their teeth started to go bad leading to all four of them having to have several teeth removed over the course of a couple years. Scooby had some heart issues and he’d started growling at the vet whenever she started to do anything to him to the point where he had to start being muzzled which absolutely broke my heart especially because if I remember correctly the first tiem this happened I hadn’t be able to go to the vet with them.

A bit after this or right around this time is when I started going to the vet appointments with just me and mom instead of the three of us. And when I started to notice how much my parents spoke about the dogs as if they regularly interacted with them or even looked at them.

which is. not a thing.

and this is much much longer than I thought it’d be and way more back story than necessary

but part of my issue is over the last several years I have had to listen to my mom talk about the dogs as if she looks at them on the regular and out of the three of us she sees and interacts with them the LEAST which was so frustrating. But at the vet appointments when she’d ask us questions I wouldn’t really have answers either because I hadn’t seen them much. So it was mostly I don’t knows or I don’t think sos

and idk I just have always felt like such a shit pet owner tbh

and then we get mackenzie and it’s even more obvious the lack of full attention the dogs outside get and ughhh

I don’t know like I said this is so much more than I ment and not quite the problem but the focus is that flower was having some issues and so I brought it up and after two times of bringing it up a vet appointment was made and I just felt almost embarrassed taking her to the vet? Her nails were really long and curled and she’s stumbling a little bit and her teeth are in pain and mom is like

talking about how she’s old

and the vet makes a comment about how all her teeth might have to be pulled and mom is like so I don’t know but it’s annoying listening to her talk like she’s paying as much or more atteniton to me and also hm and haw about the costs as if it’s /her/ money when it’s actually my dad’s and even still I have enough money for things that she may need done

and I was texting christine and she mentioned how this isn’t my fault it’s my parents because I repeadly have brought up concerns and they idd nothing and it makes me feel a little bit better but also still really bad and also really mad because

why put so much “oh they’re your dogs” on a child

I understand putting responsibilty on a child to take care of something that’s alive but also like

when do they come into it?? my parents do that with mackenzie too they repeatedly bring up, especially my father, how mackenzie is my dog as if all decisions fall on me. and it’s just

ANNOYING UGH

I don’t know where I’m going with this and its a lot but I just am so tired...

#this got really really long and is much more than I thought and more backstory than the rant probably needs #but ugh #it's about my dogs #and it's really long #don't mind me #shoosh nobody cares

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melodicmermaid · 8 years ago

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...Dead Sea Minerals?

Read on AO3

Summary:

Lance is running out of his face masks and has given up on expecting to replenish his stock. Keith decides to fix the problem.

Happy Valentine’s Day (Klancentine’s Day? Is that stretching it?) @mangomomm! I’m your secret gifter for @klancevalentines‘ exchange. c: I hope you enjoy the fic!

I’m literally the worst at titling things; I’m sorry. ;w;

Keith sat in the dining area of the castle with everyone except for Hunk, who was finishing up with breakfast, and Lance, who was either still sleeping or still getting ready. He figured the latter, since Lance was usually with the rest of the group by the time they started eating. Since the blue paladin insisted that he needed to get a full eight hours of sleep every night, he was more often than not the last one to start his day. Of course, he was a royal pain in the ass if he missed out on sleep, so it was preferred that he was late. Keith would never admit it out loud, but he admired Lance’s ability to do what he did to keep himself upbeat and as happy as he could be, being stranded out in space.

As Hunk started bringing over the plates of food, Lance walked in, pouting, and before anyone could ask about it, he was whining. “This is a tragedy! An outrage! My entire life is about to be ruined!”

“What’s going on, Lance?” Shiro questioned. They all knew he was probably being more dramatic than the situation called for. Shiro always let him talk, just in case the issue actually pertained to everyone else on the ship. Regardless, they all knew that when Lance was upset, it was best to let him talk about it.

“I’m almost out of my skincare products! I only have enough for tomorrow!”

“Have you talked to Allura and Coran about Altean skincare? Or asked about looking during a supply run?” Pidge suggested, not looking up from their plate of food.

“Yes! Altean anything is scary and Allura has insisted that anything like what I need is either going to be extremely expensive or in Galra territory and it’s not worth risking it for a luxury,” Lance was visibly frustrated.

“The best we can do then is just look out for it when we make stops. I’m sure you’ll be fine living without it until then,” Shiro tried to be comforting.

“Ugh, I should have looked while we were in the space mall. There would have been something there and it’s hopeless to ask Allura to go back.”

“We don’t need to have perfect skin to fight against Zarkon. It doesn’t matter how we look,” Keith chimed it.

“This isn’t about that! It’s about taking care of myself so I can fight well!” Lance snapped, stomping out of the room. Shiro frowned.

When Lance was out of earshot, Hunk spoke up, “Lance has always taken his skincare routine very seriously. He’s done it for years. Now, I think it’s more important to him than it was before since it’s the one from Earth that he still has, er, had.”

Keith suddenly felt like a jerk.

This morning was still replaying in Keith’s head even as he tried to train. He couldn’t bring himself to focus, so he shut the system down and went to change out of his paladin armor. He knew he shouldn’t be fretting over Lance being upset, but he couldn’t help it. They were getting to be pretty good friends at this point, and Keith had recently acknowledged and accepted the fact that he had feelings for Lance. He never intended to do anything about it, especially given the whole Voltron situation. He didn’t want to act on them and mess up the entire team and pursuing a relationship when they had the universe to defend didn’t seem like the best idea anyway.

Regardless, Keith felt bad about what he had said and wanted to do something that would make Lance feel better. He found himself walking to the control room, where he assumed Allura would be.

“Oh, Keith! Is there something you need?” Allura greeted him as he walked inside.

“Uh, actually, yeah, it’s about Lance-”

“Lance and his desperate need for his beauty supply stock to be replenished?” She smirked and rolled her eyes, “I got the monologue from him this morning. I’d offered to show him some Altean products weeks ago before this was even a thought, but he refused.”

“Are we stopping for supplies soon?”

“We should reach a planet that has some things we need for the ship by tomorrow morning. But I’ve told him, it’s going to be too expensive or there’s not going to be anything at all.”

“I’ve hardly spent any of my allowance. I’m sure I’ll have enough. Let me go?”

Allura sighed, but smiled. “Alright. I’ll take you, Hunk, and Coran with me tomorrow. Don’t expect anything, but then again, you’d be much less insufferable about it than Lance.”

“Thank you, Princess.”

The next morning went as Allura said it would. Lance, of course, complained about not getting to go since he usually goes when Hunk does and he wanted to look for potential products.

“I’ve chosen the best team based on what we know about this planet and its inhabitants. I’m sorry, Lance, but I won’t risk it for a luxury item,” Allura calmly explained. The explanation was enough to stop him from vocalizing more discontent, but he would probably be pouting all day.

One the ship taking them down to the planet, Allura explained that she’d be going to talk politics while the three of them would head to the market. “Keith will be going on his own to look for something to bring back for Lance.”

“Wait, what? Seriously?” Hunk looked over to the red paladin.

“Yeah. I probably have enough money since I haven’t spent any of my share.”

“Aw, young love!”

“Hunk.”

“Relax, I’m just messing with you, but this is, like, really nice of you,” he paused, “For the record, though, your crush is not subtle and we all know. Well, Lance doesn’t know. He’s beyond oblivious.”

“Whatever. I won’t do anything about it.”

“This is kinda doing something about it. But, hey, it’s your decision and I’m not gonna meddle.”

They landed without much more discussion. Allura went off on her on and Hunk and Coran parted with him once they made it to the market, agreeing to meet back at the entrance in two hours.

As he walked, he mostly saw ship parts, food, what looked like toys or trinkets, and tons of other things he had no idea how to categorize, though he was certain they weren’t skin products. He listened to conversations of shoppers that passed him, but heard nothing. He could keep walking around, but he knew it’d be much quicker to try and ask someone.

“Um, excuse me?” he asked, approaching what looked like a family. They eyed him curiously, but stopped walking to let him speak, “I don’t know if you can help me out a bit, but I’m looking for a place that sells, uh, skincare stuff or beauty products? Is there anything like that here?”

“Keep going all the way down this row of stands, then turn right at the end. It’ll be on your left, though they will likely be low on stock, if there is anything left at all,” the tallest one answered.

“Thank you,” Keith waved and walked the way that he was instructed.

Just as the alien had described, there was a stand with a small creature trying to draw in customers. He approached the table and was immediately greeted by the salesalien. “Welcome! What can I get for you?”

“My friend is out of… stuff. I have a list of what’s in it, but it’s from Earth. I don’t know if you’ll have anything similar? It’s mostly, uh, dead sea minerals?” He had no idea how in the world something like that could make up a face product, but Lance must've known what he was doing.

“Earth? Never heard of it. Let me see that list,” she reached her hand out and Keith gave her the slip of paper, “Water, kaolin, bentonite, maris sal, linalool, methylchloroisothiazolinone…” she mumbled the items on the list to herself with a thoughtful expression. “Can I test my products on your arm?”

Keith nodded and pulled off the armor and the gloves from his suit before reaching his arm over the table. The alien began putting a little bit of a bunch of products onto his skin.

“Does anything burn? Sting? Feel like it’s doing something it shouldn’t?”

“It’s not painful. I don’t know what they’re supposed to feel like, but um, is it supposed to dry like this one or this one?” he pointed to two of the lines of the cream.

The salesalien giggled, “This one is meant to be washed off and this one is meant to be peeled, so they should be drying differently. If none of them are causing any pain or discomfort by now they are all safe for your species to use. I don’t know what your friend’s skin is like, so I can’t make any specific recommendations. Take your pick.”

Keith had hoped only one or two things would be safe so he didn’t have to chose. He didn’t even know what Lance’s skin was like, so he had to wing it.

About five minutes later, the salesalien was beaming and Keith had almost no money left. He did, however, have an abundance of product for Lance. When he met up with Coran and Hunk, the two raised their eyebrows. When Allura joined them, she looked amused. They’d probably never let go of the fact that Keith definitely panicked and bought everything.

Hunk agreed to keep Lance busy enough for Keith to put all the products away in Lance’s cabinet in the bathroom. He didn’t want to make it a bigger deal than he knew it was already going to be. Once that was all settled, he returned to the rest of the team and listened to Allura’s post-mission announcements, then headed to his room.

Lance’s heart was racing. He had gone into the bathroom, prepared to scrape out whatever little bit remained in his products before he turned in for the night and was met with cabinets full of lotions and face masks and scrubs.

Impulsively, he ran out of the bathroom and bumped into Shiro. “Lance? Everything okay?”

“WholeftallthethingsinmycabinetdidAllur--”

“Woah, slow down there.”

“Who left the stuff in my cabinets? Was it actually Allura?”

“From what I heard, that would be Keith.”

“What!?” Lance’s jaw dropped.

“Don’t look at me. If you want to know, he’s the one you need to talk to.”

Lance didn’t know how to react. Shiro left him alone to process the information that Keith was the mystery gifter. Keith was the last person Lance would have expected to do something like this. He found himself walking to Keith’s room, which was right next to his room so he supposed he could just go back to his room if he chickened out. He tapped on the door, pretty quietly, but he was sure that it was heard. The door slid open a few moments later.

“Oh, uh, hey Lance,” Keith’s voice faltered a little bit, not having expected Lance to approach him so quickly, “Can I… help you?”

“Didn’t you already?” Lance chuckled.

“Ah, yeah. It was nothing, really.”

“‘Nothing really’ he says! Keith I could kiss you I’m so happy.” Keith’s eyes widened. “It’s a figure of speech!” Keith visibly released some of the tension from his muscles, and Lance took the opening to step forward and gave him a quick peck on the corner of his mouth. “But actually kissing you works, too.”

“Don’t tease me like that,” Keith looked down and reached for the button to close the door, “You’re welcome for the stuff.”

“Hey, hey, wait a minute! I’m not teasing you,” he blocked the door from closing with his arm, “Do you want to… try some of the product with me?”

Keith was silent for a few moments, but eventually nodded. “Yeah, okay.”

“Great! You kinda bought enough to last me like a year.”

“I didn’t know what I was doing.”

“Obviously,” Lance took hold of Keith’s wrist and led him down the hallways and into the bathroom.

Lance was bouncing as he pulled one of the face masks off the cabinet shelf. They say across from each other on the bathroom floor. “Alright, Keithy,” Keith’s heart skipped a beat at the nickname, “I’ll put this on my face and then you just copy what I do on your own face.”

He nodded and watched as Lance took some of the substance onto two of his fingers and started slowly rubbing it on his left cheek in circular motions. He spread it across his cheek, then on to his chin, and then on to the other cheek. He took more of the cream as he needed and kept the same motion going, adjusting the size of the circles as needed, all over his face until it was completely covered. “Your turn!”

The bottle was pushed toward him, so Keith did the same, or what he thought was the same. He took the cream onto his fingers and then began rubbing it on his face.

“Keith! Keith, no!”

“What?”

“You literally just watched me do it, no, you know what, give me that,” Lance snatched up the bottle and scooted closer to Keith, “I’ll just put it on you. Bonding moment, right?”

Lance reached his hand up and began fixing the glob that Keith had rubbed onto his face. His touch was gentle, and he moved his hand in the same circular motion he’d used before. He pulled away to add more of the cream to his fingers, and Keith shivered at the contact this time. “Everything okay?”

“Yeah. Yeah, it’s fine. A little cold, but, uh, fine.” Lance nodded and kept going. It took a bit longer for Keith’s face to get covered, probably because Lance just wasn’t used to putting this stuff on other people. Regardless, it was over and Lance was no longer in his personal bubble. “These things really do look stupid.”

“It’s not about how they look while they’re on, it’s about the magic that happens and what you look like afterward.”

“Magic? You mean making my face stiff and uncomfortable?”

“Stop talking, you’re gonna make both of our crack and fall off.”

“Our faces?” Keith joked, though he tried not to smirk.

“Oh my god no the ma- oh, you’re joking. Shut up.”

They sat in mostly silence. Lance started humming something that Keith didn’t recognize, but he did like it. He hadn’t expected to enjoy sitting with Lance like this, even if his face felt extremely unpleasant. It was times like this when Lance wasn’t being overly dramatic or too outspoken that reminded Keith how much he liked Lance. It was times like this when he wanted nothing more than to act on his feelings.

The humming stopped suddenly, making Keith look up and into Lance’s eyes. Since when were they so... blue?

“Can I kiss you?” the words left Keith’s mouth before he could stop them. He saw Lace’s expression falter, as much as it could with the mask.

“Didn’t… didn’t I already-”

“Lance.” The boy in question nodded, and Keith moved toward him. Their lips touched, barely, but Lance backed away abruptly.

“No, nope, no, no, no, no I just got the mask in my mouth that was disgusting.” Lance sputtered and Keith couldn’t help but laugh.

It wasn’t long before their faces were washed. Keith had to admit that these things really do work; his face felt very nice and overall he felt refreshed. They walked back to their rooms, and both stopped in front of Lance’s door. “Do you… want to come in for a while?”

Lance blushed, looking expectantly at Keith. “Yeah, alright.”

He opened the door and as they walked inside he commented, “I mean, I guess I owe you a kiss. Or two. Or more.”

“I guess you do.”

#klance #vld #voltron #voltron legendary defender #klancevalentines #mangomomm #keith kogane #lance (voltron)#fanfiction #fanfic

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