#ugh. I'm so frustrated
Explore tagged Tumblr posts
Text

"The one who failed first"
#art#fanart#arcane fanart#arcane#jayce talis#jayce arcane#jayvik#sorry I don't have any valentine's art so yeah#enjoy!#i mean angst is still considered romantic right?#also yeah I always see about Old Viktor but I also thought#what about that first Jayce?#because technically one got sacrificed right?#I actually did this one week ago or so I just never posted it#slightly conflicted with this piece because it started as something else but then I got frustrated so ugh#I'm still salty about that mh mh#mangywayway
1K notes
·
View notes
Text

My artbook just arrived and what do you mean they could have looked like this?? Who looked at these designs and thought: No wait, I have a better idea :)
WHO WAS IT?? COME HERE I JUST WANNA TALK
#dragon age the veilguard#dragon age#morrigan#dorian pavus#isabela dragon age#idk is this a spoiler?#i guess#dragon age the veilguard spoilers#datv spoilers#veilguard spoilers#dav spoilers#i'm so mad not gonna lie#so you're really telling me there were these designs and they CHANGED them??#WHY???#i'm sorry i don't want to be mad but this is honestly so frustrating#the whole art book makes me a little angry ngl#veilguard critical#ugh#my girl morrigan actually looks like i think she would 20 years down the line ;A;#ahhh
1K notes
·
View notes
Text
and the universe said, i love you because you are love
#kingdom hearts#kh#khedit#khgraphics#dailygaming#gamingedit#khgifs#sora#axel#ventus#kairi#namine#xion#terra#riku#roxas#repliku#aqua#my edits#my gifs#ugh i started working on this WAY too long ago and went really slowly because i got frustrated#so please ignore all the flaws. i just wanted to finally get this idea out there lol#edit: also someone said in the tags that it was cool of me to give roxas gray eyes#and i actually didn't even mean to do that with the coloring but now i'm pretending i did. because it IS cool. it works well on him.#all the other eye color changes were 100% on purpose though lol. brown eyed terra and green eyed ven and purple eyed kairi SUPREMACY!!!
957 notes
·
View notes
Note
What do you think of how WFA is currently using Duke so far? On the one hand bringing in We are Robin is good but on the other hand I feel like it they still are sidelining him. He's still benched and sure they brought in We are Robin but it felt like they were more used for Damian and his story, and they had Duke set up this support system but we've seen others like Steph doing more with it and really interacting with it. I feel like them say introducing We Are Robin but like making interact more with Damian and be there for his story is like "see we read Duke, now here's the other characters we really want to focus"
I've fallen behind on WFA for a few weeks so I just caught up! And. Yeah. I have thoughts. (Also again disclaimer I don't have FastPass so this is based on the free eps as of now).
In August last year I did an analysis of Duke Thomas in WFA, where I outlined my gripes. Then, in December, I praised the We Are Robin-centric episode. Right after, I wrote about how the next episode was making me a little wary but I was still optimistic.
Just outlining this to demonstrate that my feelings on WFA bounce back and forth a lot, but I do think it can do better and it has done better. So I'm gonna read on (because it's the only consistent place for Duke content, and because I like the Batgirls in it enough), but long story short: I'm pissed.
(Putting a rant under the cut; if you're enjoying S3 of WFA, I'm genuinely happy for you! I'm going to take a more negative stance than usual though so don't read if you don't want to hear that stuff).
Okay first of all the benching. All the way back in August I complained about Duke being benched, in a season that started with his kidnapping and revolves around the Joker. At the time I was hopeful he'd be unbenched, but it's been 34 eps and he's STILL BENCHED!! Even if he's unbenched in the FastPass eps I don't have, it's still ridiculous that he was out of the field for that long.
What happened when canon Duke got injured I wonder??
Oh yeah, in the Cursed Wheel he SNUCK OUT!!! Because he has agency!!!! What's frustrating about benching Duke for the entirety of S3 so far is that Duke, at his core, is a character of action. From his very first appearance in Zero Year, he's defined by an absurd amount of agency, wanting to fight the Riddler (then finding his parents, then joining WAR, then becoming Signal). A Duke that sits by for THIRTY FOUR EPISODES is NOT DUKE THOMAS!!!
But he's broken his arm, right? It makes sense for him to be benched?? Well first of all it was WFA's CHOICE to break his arm, a choice I do not think added anything to Duke's character or to Bruce's paranoia (which was clearly the entire point of Duke's kidnapping in the first place). Secondly, another character was injured in a fight with the Joker and benched. Another character who REJOINED THE FIELD IN 16 EPISODES!!!!
Dick gets injured in #130 and goes back out in #146. That is under half of how many episodes Duke's been benched for, AND Dick got injured in a fight against Joker. Duke didn't even get to fight!!! He didn't get to do anything!!! Dick's injury was also stupid, but the way WFA handled his benching versus Duke's is worlds apart, and shows to me how much less they respect Duke than the others.
Also can I just say how gross it was to use Duke's kidnapping merely to kickstart the plot? An astonishing 14 episodes pass before we get any mention of how Duke feels (in #132, he says he has nightmares). Then another 11 eps pass before we get to him talking to Lucius + calling WAR. That nightmares thing is never followed up on either! In #124 and #132, Duke's dialogue functions to further the plot or other characters - in #124, Duke justifies the others going out, and in #132, he helps Bruce through his feelings. Even when the episodes are about him, they are not about him!!! I genuinely think only 2 eps out of this entire season haven't used Duke as a prop for someone else.
I'm going to briefly detour to discuss #132 because I loathe that episode. In Homebound, Bruce visits Duke and they play Battleship (it was cute. fine. whatever). And then Bruce offers to hear Duke out on how he feels. Smash cut to:
ARE YOU SERIOUS??? We spent more than 3 episodes on Jason's PTSD, but we couldn't even spend a single panel on Duke talking about his own trauma???? Whether or not you liked the Jason bits this season, he had a moment. Babs also has her moment, and a whole ep is spent with just her and her dad. Duke, of the 3 Bats that have the biggest associations with the Joker, never gets to fully express how he feels. This off-panel cop-out is honestly kind of insulting.
Another detour: the kidnapping ep. We finally get Duke's full backstory after TWO WHOLE SEASONS (besides a brief mention in #76), and it was just not good. Besides the fact that Duke's kidnapping is, as I've mentioned, just a way to get the plot moving, I don't like the way WFA handles his parents:
What on EARTH are you talking about. This feels like a justification for Duke having never mentioned his parents before, but it's completely untrue to Duke's canon character. Sure, he thinks about his parents more than he talks about them, but WFA Duke never thinks about them either!! This narration box just riles me up whenever I think about it.
I was a bit nicer to this part in my first analysis, but no this part just straight up sucks. First off, I don't believe canon!Duke fears being turned into "something like [his parents]". In Cursed Wheel, he more or less comes to terms with how his parents are: "every horrible thing coming out of [my parents'] mouths? They're actually telling me how much they love me. [...] Let them stay." WFA always picking the weirdest things (becoming like his parents, his powers) for Duke to be scared about!
Secondly, this part juxtaposes the 'horror' of becoming like his parents ("something like them") and the wonderful, beautiful vision of "home": Bruce Wayne. Not only is this in direct defiance of Duke's canon character, it just strikes me as an odd and mean-spirited comparison. It essentially erases Duke's parents from his vision of 'home', just to fit him into the Wayne nuclear family.
But to get to the actual topic of the ask: We Are Robin. I still think the We Are Robin ep (#144) is the best Duke in the entirety of WFA, but did things improve afterwards? Did we focus on the WAR kids, their relationship to Duke, or their overall relationship to Robin? Nope. Turns out WAR, like Duke, was a prop for Damian!!
Damian is too harsh in training the Robins, so Duke intervenes. Damian stomps off and has a heart-to-heart with Jon, during which he admits he was trying to prove himself as Robin by training WAR. I actually like this premise!!! Duke and Damian have always had a contentious relationship to each other's Robins, and it makes TOTAL sense for Damian to be dismissive of WAR and think of it as a way to 'prove' himself. The problem is we did this already. TOM KING did it, in Robin War!!!
This is literally a microwaved TK story with worse writing and less nuance. In Robin War, we explored the way Damian dismisses Duke + WAR, both Duke and Damian's feelings of inadequacy around being Robin, and both of them eventually finding common ground and accepting each other. This arc is that except we cut out Duke's perspective. Now, it's all about Damian's feelings about Robin, and nothing about Duke or WAR's relationship to the mantle!
I cannot stress enough that this is a worse version of Robin War, and Robin War isn't even that good!!!
By centering We Are Robin's appearance on Damian, we lose about 99% of WAR's relationships to each other (and especially to Duke). The only specific relationship we see is Duke and Izzy blushing around each other. No acknowledgement of the Dre-Duke beef, the Riko-Duke crush, Dax-Dre friendship, these are a bunch of extras in a movie about Damian Wayne I guess.
You get absolutely no sense of who Izzy, Riko, Dre, or Dax are. The only thing you learn about them is that they're incompetent!
It's been a couple of episodes and they've been beaten TWICE. I get that they're not the main characters, but compared to the Outlaws or other affiliated teams, WAR is portrayed as ineffectual. And both times it's for Damian's sake. This is so frustrating because Damian + WAR is a really interesting relationship, but because WFA never focuses on WAR's feelings or reactions, it doesn't feel like an equal conflict. It feels like Damian vs. some cardboard cutouts.
WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE??? Why aren't they even a tiny bit mad at Damian for either Robin War (WHICH DID HAPPEN BECAUSE WE ARE ROBIN IS CANON HERE) or what he did to them literally a few eps ago?? You know what, why aren't they mad at DUKE for ghosting and abandoning them?? They mention very briefly at the start that it's 'all good', but why??? Is it because WFA is not invested in their feelings??? Is it because we don't have space to explore even a modicum of Duke's story??????
Having a We Are Robin plot not focused on Duke Thomas or even We Are Robin is so upsetting, especially because the WAR ep was genuinely grounded in canon. Like you said in the ask, it does feel like they put that in there just to prove they've read WAR. What is clear to me now is that, though they've read the run, they didn't understand it. They did it for a perfunctory 'here's some Duke stuff' and never bothered to be interested in any of these characters' stories.
Because we should have gotten Duke's side of things. Damian gets an entire ep to talk to Jon and another to prove himself by fighting Joker, and Duke gets a few panels where he's like 'Damian don't usurp my training I forgive you though'. Season 3 has come the closest to giving WFA!Duke some depth, and because it comes the closest, it also fails the hardest. I still have hope that Duke will get some moments in this season, but I'm losing hope that it will make up for his treatment at all.
Apparently an upcoming Cass ep isn't great so they're really attacking me personally at this point. Idk what gets me is that for some people, this is their first exposure to Duke and WAR. For some people this is and will continue to be their only exposure. And it's this watered-down, uninteresting, bland, prop version of him that just is not the Duke Thomas I know and love.
#duke thomas#we are robin#rant post#ask#look i don't usually like to rant but i am really frustrated right now#the treatment of duke is interfering with me enjoying anything else in the webtoon#UGH it's so annoying because I genuinely like some of the cass eps but I have never once enjoyed a wfa duke ep#i was so close with we are robin ep. WE WERE SO CLOSE TO HAVING A GOOD DUKE IN WFA#ofc if you enjoy duke in wfa that's totally fine but please i beg of you read we are robin first#HOW can you read we are robin and come away with 'i think we should use these characters as props for damian's story'#yknow what not even a good damian story. damian i will also free you from 'i'm an insecure robin also i kill people' plotlines#canon duke and damian 100000x more interesting right now than anything in wfa s3. seriously read dc power and batman and robin#thanks for the ask tho <33 i know we discussed before abt we are robin i hate that we gave wfa even a little faith at the time#sigh. read dc rise of the power company & we are robin & batman and the outsiders & gotham nights 8 & batman and the signal
85 notes
·
View notes
Text
Joe and Ja'Marr discussing a throw that didn't go well 🥲
#can't even caption this i have no idea what they're talking about#google is not helping me figure out what a penguin is in football terms#only getting football teams called penguins as results lol#i'm guessing some kind of wobbly ball? or that one ball that just kind of sailed on ja'marr?#love ja'marr's approach!#hey - you fucked up! but i'm saying it in a lighthearted manner because you so rarely let me down!#let's talk it out let's figure out what happened#and then he immediately accepts his explanation and moves on#meanwhile joe makes the most frustrated face in the world and gazes off into the distance lol#poor guy#(no frustration expressed at ja'marr though!)#ugh loved this mic'd up so many good joe'marr moments so many good moments in general!!#mic ja'marr up EVERY GAME please thank you#joe burrow#ja'marr chase
133 notes
·
View notes
Text
Swear to god this will be the last post I make about it but they finally address the whole 'south American' lostbelt thing only to 1: keep calling it the wrong location 2: still not get the right location


Like I need them to be so serious right now, it's not like the Aztec and Mayan civilizations weren't spread through Mesoamerica but they were not primarily Central American and all the named locations in this lostbelt are named after places in Mexico! Which is in North America! Which is very explicitly not part of Central America!!
#my post#IM GOING TO EXPLODE I SWEAR TO GOD#this is such a basic fucking error like how would they like it if I started saying they were part of mainland Asia??? like that would#be weird right?? it would be even weirder if I then was like 'well obvs they aren't actually mainland asia but we're gonna keep calling them#that 🥰 btw they're actually peninsular asia 🥰' and also one of their servants still referred to herself#as being from mainland Asia LIKE THAT WOULD BE WEIRD RIGHT#and yes they're going onto the 'there was...an alien' thing but#OH MY GOD ITS NOT THAT HARD TO GET A MAP#I'm honestly frustrated at how dumb they're making ritsuka too#like I do know the basic history of the Americas#and facts about dinosaurs.#ugh I'm SORRY I'm trying to be positive I just.#I want to beat something over the head with an atlas#how do you fuck around with this so bad it genuinely would've been less annoying to just MOVE ORT#negative post#criticism#me 2 minutes no hating: 😖
30 notes
·
View notes
Text
i am trying to write a thing (tm) and i am stressed (tm) this is not turning out how i want aaaaaaaa
don't worry guys it's not any fic that you know about. it's just this thing that was supposed to be a tiny oneshot and now i've written SO MUCH but it's just not turning out how i want AT ALL and AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
#speg chatter#wip chatter#ugh i'm just not happy with it but i worked so hard on it and i liked all these different parts#so frustrating#sorry for the delay with all the fics guys. i'll definitely post this weekend#i just wish i could do this spontaneously. and i CAN write but its just that what comes out isnt what i wanted aaaaaaa
23 notes
·
View notes
Text
im in a weird transitional state rn (starting grad school in the fall, living in my family's cabin in Vermont until then) and im famously bad at unstructured time when im living by myself so . trying to be better and actually Get Up and Be Productive (whatever form that takes) but it's HARD. i need the buddy system. if someone was here id be thriving.
#it's just frustrating. i should be having a great time im extremely lucky and happy to be here#but instead I'm letting my brain put me on tumblr for the first 4 hours of the day lol#UGH.#ok but i have now eaten lunch so this is good. and im going to go on a woods adventure with the dog once i get dressed#diary
24 notes
·
View notes
Text
Sorry, I just need to get this off my chest.
You know what's shit?
That I always come back to work on my explanation posts on why Alya, Plagg, and Emonette being treated unfairly and being disregarded by Maribug's writing is by now pissing me off to similar degrees as her bad treatment of Chat Noir
But that always ends in a domino effect of me putting together more of the overall narrative that ticks me off so much cause my ADD brain can't NOT look for the continuous string of the writing pattern I follow once I'm at it.
You probably can imagine that this isn't very good for my mental health and the only reason why I'm still doing it is because I have a strong suspicion on what the new story arc will do with Cerise after this agonizing hiatus, and only once the actual new story arc proves me wrong can my ADD brain let this emotional investment of 7+ years in my "comfort show" since I was a 16 rest in peace.
Being neurodivergent is exhausting of FUCK...
So I always stop writing any of the posts about the other topics and come back to my Adrichat corner because that's the "safe space" my brain is the most familiar and comfortable with by now since season 4 to make a post AT ALL that isn't running the risk of leading me down 7 new rabbit holes I can't unsee anymore afterwards...
I MISS looking into several narrative threads in this show and voicing my opinions on them. In hindsight, I regret not having done it more when it was still possible, but I feel like it should have been alright in any other normally written show to have a fan blog dedicated to a specific part of the story. I feel like I shouldn't be the one in the WRONG for having done that.
Anyway, I honestly MISS the time where I knew that Maribug's benefit and comfort weren't the only things accepted as "valid" readings of the story. From both sides. Supporters and critics/salters.
Where saying anything that isn't immediately connected to Marinette's benefit and comfort didn't need a full-blown 20 page essay post going into any detail possible to fight for the right to even be taken seriously as a realistic reading of the story at all.
I know I'm not the only one upset at this, but I wonder how many people really realized by now how batshit insane this is right now. That only the most vanilla and vague-ass posts that do their best to not in anyway say something that would be "mean" and "non-validating" to Marinette can be posted now without it automatically being categorized as at least "critical" or running the risk of getting perceived as salt or wishful-thinking.
You can't point ANYTHING out anymore without at least one person running in and either saying "You just HATE Marinette and want to see her punished! You people never care about HERRRRRRRRRR (regarding a topic that isn't about her or is her fucking JOB as a narrative tool to DO)" or "Yeah, nah, the show would never let that happen because of the Marinette bias lol"
You can't even say anything anymore about Adrien's abuse without it being either undermined to all hell because of Marinette having been bullied and needing to be a girlboss who does to others what she's declared "tortured" for, or Félix "hypocrite and victim-blamer" Fathom. Gabriel being abusive was once the most basic ass thing to talk about, what the fuck happened?? (don't answer that, I know the answer...)
The whole analysis' side of this fandom that isn't catering to Marinette was either killed or basically exiled into the "critical" or outright "salt" tag because you can't even be interested in world-building anymore without having to fight for the post's right to be taken seriously under the crushing weight of Marinette's narrative benefits and comfort.
Because mademoiselle ain't fucking interested in ANYTHING lore wise beyond what's convenient for her (not to mention the retcons), so talking about the Guardian and Kwami lore for example counts as SALT now because it automatically implies for people that Marinette isn't all that matters and her flaws of not being interest in ANYTHING might actually COUNT as flaws she should work on. I know, the fucking HORROR! 😱
I MISS writing theories, analysis posts, and speculating about this shows future plots in even the most basic "set up and pay off" manner but I know I can't because my default approach is always complementary to the main character - meaning what challenges them and the narrative the most to grow, expand, and develop. This isn't a Marinette specific thing, I ALWAYS do this.
And contrary to popular belief in this fandom, I get by perfectly fine doing that for the majority of other pieces of media I consume. It is MIRACULOUS and this damn Fandom that now genuinely did it's best to convince themselves that this level of main character centric morality and revenge porn level writing is NORMAL when it's seriously NOT.
There is a REASON why this show hardly ever gets recommended on social media the way one would think despite its success. Or why the Fan backlash is so enormous despite a solid part of the Fandom already having left long ago and the young target demographic not uniformly having a voice in the social media discourse.
Or why people actively advise others AGAINST watching the show, AGAINST forming an emotional investment, and AGAINST going anywhere near the Fandom.
Cause no fucking shit, this isn't normal.
#ml critical#ml salt#ml fandom critical#ml writing critical#I just need to get this off my chest#I'm frustrated that I just failed to write about the third narrative topic this week#First Emonette then Plagg and now Alya#This hiatus is killing me#I just want to know if I'm right going forwards or if I can rest this emotional investment of 7+ years in peace after this first story arc#UGH#how the FUCK did all this escalate so fucking badly?? This is insane
53 notes
·
View notes
Text

Ehhh fuck it I'll post this one too -- I wanted to color it first, but. I'm actually split on redoing Alfonse's outfit completely, or at least making adjustments.
Like, in my head, I think I was doing two separate things between the Askr siblings and it just doesn't feel cohesive to me now.
What, you ask? Well, the first thought behind this, was this is a visit. So, Sharena is straight up wearing Moe's old clothes it never could seem to let go of. I think I got mixed up around Alfonse, though. Literally half and half. He's wearing some of Moe's clothes (esp the flannel, green, band merch), but the idea here is they did have to go out and get stuff that actually fits right.
Which... works. It does work. But I think in the back of my head I was also wanting to design an outfit that's more AU coded. Going from argyle sweater vest ass to mmmmaybe trying to develop his own sense of style. Which kind of directly clashes w the idea that he's wearing some of Moe's clothes. But also. So. SO BADLY. ESP IN THIS CONTEXT. I would LOVE for Moe to have direct influence in the process of that. Another detail you don't even get to see here is Alfonse is wearing a studded belt. Courtesy of Moe.
Lack of direction too many ideas at once. Maybe if it's an AU, the dress could have been a hand-me-down? If you like it, and it fits. You can have it. If you want... (Moe completely dodging just how deeply meaningful this gesture is when doing this). But also, could go REALLY crazy if Moe (previous life) had fashion taste that was close enough to Sharena's that, like. At different points of time, each ended up picking out the same dress. It's such a funny line to balance, actually. Because despite all the parallels I may draw between them, Moe was NEVER what Peony was, to Sharena. Not even close.
Idk idk there's a possibility that I'll get too frustrated w all the details not matching up here that I scrap it completely. Just know that the dress Sharena is wearing is pink and white. Very Princess Peach core. The style of it, though... it's pretty close to something else... a certain Something Else... just enough to scare ya. Which is ALSO WHY this might work better as a visit and unique psychological damage for Alfonse but I DIGRESS. WHAT YHE FUCK EVER. TOO MUCH GOING ON HERE JUST THROW IT ALL OUT‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️
#absolutely like after troubleshooting rubber ducking like. 99% close to just scrapping it. SAD!#too much going on. also maybe redundant on the mani nod? bc. moe held on to that one too.#you better BELIEVE it could not let go of that one.#so maybe it does work better as like. a stylistic similarity that raises an eyebrow.#or at very least deals ten points psychic damage to alfonse.#the important thing about moe is that it didn't start presenting super femme until it was 15.#which. the lore about alfonse mistaking mani to be 15. and moe placing mani at 19 (catastrophic egg cracking event)#something is happening here.#LIKE. IT ALL CONNECTS. SOMEHOW. IT ALL CONNECTS.#idk idk all i know is that i've been dying to draw sharena in that dress in particular bc it is one i actually own#but it. may not be meant to be. at least here. at least now.#I'M TOO FRUSTRATED. W THE DETAILS. ESP CAUSE IF I WENT INTO THIS DESIGNING AN AU OUTFIT#for alfonse SPECIFICALLY. this is the VERY first draft i'd probably scrap and do a million other concepts for.#UGH. i'm just too autistic about it.#swagever....#fe alfonse#sharena#moe tag#my art#moe lore#bc of. the lore is here. there is lore here.#black turtleneck underneath the flannel thumb cutouts on the sleeves. btw. on alfonse there.#form fitting strikes a convoluted balance between modest/formal emo/slutty ect ect ect#if you. even care.
19 notes
·
View notes
Text
trying so hard to believe in the love I write about
#there was this person I was talking to and I just questioned their habit of pulling away in terms of their affection towards me#and like they ended up being just sorta mean?? maybe they didn't mean it intentionally but still they were sending me mixed signals and#+ in this conversation they spoke to me as if me being confused and getting the wrong impressions from those mixed signals was a me problem#and she just kept having this attitude of like “idk what to tell you” and like “oh I'm a dick now” like bro#and she was just kinda dismissive and she even got frustrated with me because she said I just had to accept there's no happy#+ resolution#like mb for liking you and wanting a positive outcome???#anyways she got super dry towards the end and so I really had nothing to do but leave#and I'm done with being the only one consistently affectionate and honest about my feelings and I'm done with the mixed signals#+ no matter how intentional or unintentional they are#and I can't be the only one trying to be hopeful like goddamn#ANYWAYS anyone who said being a lesbian is easier LIED#s.text#ugh I know the love I write about exists I've felt it but I just am getting more and more jaded about my chances of having it longterm
14 notes
·
View notes
Text
i've been so miserable lately but at least i still enjoy music and learning
#i actually don't think i can put up with people rn#and that's more on me#but some of it is also frustration with other peoples attitudes#mine might not be good but at least i'm trying to still have compassion#i'm really trying rn and i feel like i'm stuck#thank god for being an academic weapon#but i genuinely feel like i'm undergoing too many changes at once and it's scary and i don't want to be around people!!#i feel like i've lately been concerning myself with others a lot#but all of a sudden now i'm worried about MYSELF and how i'm changing and i'm not the same person as i was even a few minutes ago#i don't rly know who i am#the fact that i still have the same values is very very comforting but otherwise i feel like shit#i've been happy but there's like an underlying melancholia throughout me this week it's so lame#ugh ok shutting tf up now#ceri.txt
20 notes
·
View notes
Text
Ugh I just can't seem to write anything for my thesis today it's so weird. Like- I know what to do but I feel so anxious I've done literally nothing for a whole hour.
#misa's undergrad journey#misa talks#I need to write at least a part of it and show it to my prof but I think I'm dreading the showing part#I know it doesn't really matter that much but god it feels so?????#tbf I got told recently that the reason my marks were deducted is that my arguments aren't well supported#and I honestly don't know what more to do it's so frustrating#and then today I got my midsem marks for a course where I got 9.5/30#and I'm....well.....not very glad about it obviously#ugh I know things like this don't happen all the time#and that it'll pass; I'll be fine#but god I'm just???????#I feel like crap rn#It's also always worse when your friends get like 20-25/30?#Good for them; I'm happy they're getting good marks but just-#aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa#I thought scrolling through tumblr would help but it's just making my imminent dread increase#I'll leave hopefully I can do SOMETHING
18 notes
·
View notes
Text
Ugh I feel so bad for Morgana, that she feels so alone about her magic.
You'd think she and Merlin would be closer despite the fact that she doesn't know Merlin has magic, if only for the fact that he knows she has magic and is safeguarding her secret.
Maybe he's angry at her for cowardice about the Witchfinder and not helping to try and free Gaius. She seemed more concerned about herself ngl but I don't blame her tbh. It's understandable and a flaw in her character. She doesn't have to be perfect. Trying to save your own skin from persecution and burning is perfectly understandable and the Witchfinder was manipulating her and playing with her fears.
I'll give Merlin this. He's strong in the sense that he is willing to sacrifice his life for the people he loves. And Gaius too... I think Morgana doesn't realize she is loved very much. She's just privileged. But love. She lives with a father figure who professes that he loves her but treats people like her like scum and then there's Arthur who always sides with her father-figure.
(Writing this I can see why a lot of LGBTQ compare the ban on magic to the persecution of LGBTQ because anybody could be gay, anybody could be born of magic, and your parent might love but the moment they find out that you're different that you're queer, is the moment they might reject you, especially if they've shown prejudice before. That's pretty harsh. So, I get why people queerify or see Merlin and Morgana as gay).
She lived her life as a privileged girl never expecting to give up much and she also doesn't want to give up much. She wants to live her life being herself and that's all. It's not until she meets Morgause where she's allowed that and then that's when she finds the person she loves and is loyal to, the person she'll sacrifice her life for if she could.
#Morgana and Morgause apparently had an incestous lesbian relationship#that's how Katie McGrath was playing it apparently#unless she was joking#it's hard to tell with her#She's also a Merthur shipper apparent#Katie McGrath is crazy about Merthur so is one of the writers of BBC Merlin apparently#I'm lowkey kind of a Mergwen shipper too#But Mergana is my obsession and yet here I am hating... I promise I will try to post some positive Mergana posts but omg so hard#I'm so frustrated and angry#Maybe I should write my own fic idk#but omg Merlin why ugh why did the writers have to write him like this?#I love Merlin he used to be my favourite character#he still kind of is#he does have traits of a hero but ugh#I wish he had talk no jutsu powers#You'd think he would with how wise and inspirational he is#Merlin should've been Naruto and Morgana#Morgana should have been Sasuke#BBC Merlin#Morgana Pendragon#Morgana Le Fay#Morgan Le Fay
11 notes
·
View notes
Text
I just have to say, there's constructive discussion about what the show isn't getting right and then there's attacking people who are still enjoying it for what it is, more or less labeling them as bad fans or not "true" fans.
(And then getting mad when people call out what you're doing.)
#wheel of time#I know I should just bite the bullet and block the few people left on my timeline that I haven't already blocked#because good resource or not sometimes seeing their posts is so instantly frustrating#but I try so damn hard to be neutral#to show respect because there's no one way to be a fan#to understand that for those people who are unhappy about the show they're just taking it SUPER personally it doesn't meet their vision#and that's okay!#but at the end of the day#it feels like I'm saying 'yeah it's fine you don't have to like it'#and receiving 'ANYBODY WHO LIKES THIS IS TRASH'#it's not a discussion it's just bashing and at this point it's just like#then don't watch it?#it's making you so unhappy#and super toxic#you're not enjoying anything about it and seeing people enjoy it is also making you upset#so I'm just at a loss as to what to do with these people#because they clearly have no respect or consideration for viewpoints that are not their own#ugh#idk
31 notes
·
View notes
Text
really weird to see a meme i made reposted to reddit and then reposted by the devs on the very social media i first made the meme and also that they blocked me on.
it's not my Main so i'm still able to check their blog and see insights and such that i'd honestly love to share but. c'est la vie i guess.
#it's such a weird feeling.#i love the game + respect their work and i guess my criticisms WOULD warrant a block even if i didn't contact them Directly to be like#''hey i didn't like this part. here's why.''#i'm just. ugh. frustrated? i guess? i'm still frustrated even though it's been months. lmao.#and i shouldn't be frustrated.#then i see something-however quickly made and slapdash and low-effort-#that i made on their tumblr. even if it's only being used as a jumping-off point for someone else's (very good!)#analysis. and i'm not even allowed to acknowledge that post on the very blog it was posted to.#aside from vagueposts like this.#and it's an analysis i agree with + their reasoning matches the reason i included the metanarrative in the meme.#there's so much i would've loved to say on that post Directly but here i am.
8 notes
·
View notes