#u have shity memory

[xxkittywhiplashxx]

can NOT believe this rn. chat. chat chat. instead of talking to me they completely ignored my message, posted at a time I couldn't check, and than acted like it was fine In the morning

God how about u say some shiti didn't fucking know (yk..bc ..I HAVE EXTREME MEMORY GAPS AND AT THE FUCKING TIME YOU PROBABLY TALKED I WASNT IN FRONT YOU FUCKING PUSSY.)

[musicarenagh]

Crossing Musical Frontiers: Sugar Scars' Journey Hey, do you know Sugar Scars?They are this cool group of musicians from the Juarez-El Paso border region. Their music, for that matter, is so entirely different from one another - it is as if they have combined all the cultural trends from both cultures and created something different! These guys are all about providing those special moments on the dance floors you might be looking for, right?Just when people are all dancing about and grooving to the beat. Their songs touched me too, they sing about love and all those things that people get emotional about. They recently released a new single titled “Miss U” in the last week of June. It is a track which will be included in the album ‘Rhythmic Body Reflexes. ’ That song is just impressive; it has raw beat, distorted synth strings, and eerie vocals. Another lovely aspect of Sugar Scars is how they mix various styles. The thing is that it is not only in one genre ,it is like they have their own thing going on. For our next interview let us get a chance for you to be familiar with Sugar Scars as we engage them in a discussion on inspirations, creative work and the process that led to their unique music taste. Listen to Miss U https://open.spotify.com/track/1Tkjo7G9x1nKL89m36aZGi?si=3b664126427c4fd3 Follow Sugar Scars on Soundcloud Youtube Spotify Instagram What is your stage name? We go by Sugar Scars Is there a story behind your stage name? Mmm.. Well to us, there’s always been this beauty between pain followed by cathartic realization. Kind of like a relief or epiphany that brings some happiness to your heart. So sugar is something sweet that comes from a scar which is bodily evidence of pain hence the name, Sugar Scars Where do you find inspiration? Wow, from the most random places .. all I know is that when we feel inspired,we quickly take advantage and hit the studio. It’s kind of like inspiration finds us rather than the other way around What was the role of music in the early years of your life? It’s weird because no one in our families were musicians, So it didn’t really play a role in our preteen years, but everything changed in the teens ..I guess cause that age is when you think you know everything and you are conflicted about who you are as a person and that is where art comes in because it’s a reaction in expressing your reality. Are you from a musical or artistic family? Not me.. I think Luis is. Who inspired you to be a part of the music industry? I think shity lives and feeling hopeless inspired us… lol.. but as far as the word industry goes.. that’s a word we don’t like. When I think of industry, I think of child labor, slave labor, environmental destruction. We just see it as a necessary evil. How did you learn to sing/write/to play? By having inspiration and desire. That gave me the motivation to teach and push myself to learn chords and to progress. After that you must be brave and show what you have.. without caring how other people see it. What was the first concert that you ever went to and who did you see perform? My family and I went to this waterpark during Memorial Day. They had live bands there. I saw a local cover band, followed by Steppenwolf. How could you describe your music? Damn, that’s hard to answer. It’s basically a mix of any sound we like in any genre by any artist. From there,we make the song our own. Because at the end,what is music?? It’s just 12 notes that you use differently to produce the sound that makes you happy [caption id="attachment_56155" align="alignnone" width="532"] It’s basically a mix of any sound we like in any genre by any artist.[/caption] Describe your creative process. Well we show each other parts that we wrote wile being inspired. Then we add to to it till it’s done. We each add our own flavor then we both have to agree on what we wrote for it to be recorded. What is your main inspiration? Anything that will make us get off our ass and find an instrument to create.

It could be a sound or phrase. Sometimes I just play my guitar to distract me from my restless mind and something comes out that is inspiring. It just kinda happens. The point is, that there is not only one thing that can inspire. It’s actually all over the place. What musician do you admire most and why? Wow.. mmm.. probably the founding fathers like Little Richard, Robert Johnson, Chuck Berry. They basically created something that changed everything. I credit them with discovering Rock n Roll . They had an idea that revolutionized the world. Did your style evolve since the beginning of your career? Absolutely. if you ain’t growing, then you’re shrinking. Who do you see as your main competitor? Wow, let me see it could be ourselves not reaching our own potential.. depression not allowing us to be inspired… other musicians trying to make a competition out of art. There is a lot of competing entities What are your interests outside of music? Breathing and eating. Just kidding. Mmm Drawing, buying records,reading … Having OCD and organizing my clothes by color and alphabetizing my medication lol If it wasn't a music career, what would you be doing? Damn we’d be dead , Addicted to drugs and homeless.. I don’t know really.. that’s a big plot twist. I guess every human being could have a surprising explanation. It wouldn’t be reality unless it really happened so that’s a tough one. Who knows how we would react to certain realistic pressures. What is the biggest problem you have encountered in the journey of music? Being very hard on yourself for not producing the right musical idea.. the apathy of some people, Close-mindedness.. being sabotaged by other artists .. having secret haters.. It’s a long list. If you could change one thing in the music industry, what would it be? Do not allow businessman to run the industry, but instead unbiased artists. It just seems like everything that corporations and stock owners put their hands on becomes corrupted and motivated by only profit. Why did you choose this as the title of this project? I guess the title , “ Rhythmic Body Reflexes”refers to just dancing ( moving) naturally as a-response to music. That’s like the most natural reaction of expression to something that moves you. It’s kinda magical. https://open.spotify.com/artist/3WCaN9QEGnSeC67w0n1LCQ?si=iexUhGpcTgOfulGMNY_W0g What are your plans for the coming months? Playing more shows and continue writing for our next project Do you have any artistic collaboration plans This whole project is based on artistic collaboration. It’s very difficult to find someone that understands music the way you do and that complements you artistically. So we’re keeping it just between us. What message would you like to give to your fans The one that Poet wrestler John Cena gave.. “ Hustle Loyalty and Respect”

[shiurke]

When i have the time i shall paint a big bog man ta kidnaping sky kids

[vvaane]

Evon

Hi, i’m Evon. Yea that’s the best way to start writing about a god damn serial killer, a proxy or whatever you guys call us. It’s late at night and you might be wondering why someone like me would write a book, dont i have people to kill? Cops to run from? Watch my back maybe? Nah man i used to do that before... that happened. Do you ever contemplate about your life? You know things like: what if i didn’t do that? what if i stayed silent? what if what i said once changed the whole story? Yea i know, a lot of what ifs. What can i say, i like to think. I may be a monster who kills like killing machine but i still have 'me' time.

I think i’m just rambeling now but yea another thing about me is that i like to talk, maybe too much sometimes. I wasn’t always like this though, as a child i was very quite and kinda depressed. Childhood isn’t my best memory to be honest, all i remember is wasting it on suffering and building up rage, until of course, i snaped.

Usually if someone asks me about that time of my life, i kill them without hesitation but in this case no one asked me so here we fucking go. Appriciate this because i’m not gonna talk about my shity life ever again. I was born on a beautiful day of summer, 4th of july 2000. I don’t have memories of my family, the only thing i know is that my mom commited suicide because of postbirth depression and dear old dad didn’t even bother to raise me or to even be in my life, good i killed him. Anyways, i spend my childhood at a church, raised in the name of this so called god, yea that place as holy as it sounds like, it wasn’t. Everyone feared the priest. What can i say, he was the best, always beating and torturing us many times even if we didn’t do anything wrong, my best and only friend was killed by this motherfucker. I myself got in trouble many times just because i 'wasn’t a man'. I don’t know how are you supposed to be a man at 13 years old but sure. You got 3 chances to 'go on gods way' if u didn’t make it you were send to a room that looked like an old basement of a castle. The room was dark and the only light you were seeing was from a little window, the door was big and scary honestly, when you first come into the room you would see a big statue of that bitch Mary. There the priest would give you 3 options: beat you, tie you in chains and not feed you for a week or put you in isolation for up to half a year. That guy was crazy and i’m pretty sure he hated children. Every kid would choose to be beaten because it lasted a short period of time compared to the other options. I was a maniac since i was little so i tried everything, being beaten till i was unconscious which isn’t that bad compared to the other things, i was beaten with everything you can imagine, chains, belts etc. I still have scars all over my body from that. Many kids weren’t strong enough and died. Their bodys were thrown in a room and from there they would be put then in the crematorium like they were nothing. Next i was tied and not fed, let me tell you, you get so hungry at one point you would even eat youself and i have seen one kid bite into his own arm somehow. Now the last and worst, isolation.I’ve been in isolation for maximum 2 months, i was put in a diferent room, this one had no windows so no light would come in, i felt like i was in a box, i had no bed, no nothing, i would eat once every 2 days half a bread. Many kids who went there didn’t come back. My friend was always send there even if he didn’t choose that. Dear Mike died when he was 15, i was 14 at the time.

Anyway, believe it or not that prepared me for what was next to happen. How do u think i survived the proxy training? That shit is hard but i will get there in a minute. After my friends death i felt like i wasn’t myself, i felt like some other me was taking control over my mind and body. When the priest found out about this change in my behavior he said i was possesd my some kind of demon and he performed this so called exorcisms on me that consisted in bathing me in holy water, tyeing me to the bed and saying many prayers. Useless. It wasn’t any of that. I actually had a second personality, a manifestation of my darkest and deepest thoughts and ideas. It was really hard for me to get used to this other me, over the time i even gave him a name: Devon. He became my best friend, he was the the only one who understood me. I faked being a normal kid so that the priest won’t try to take Devon away from me. I didn’t take any meds so day by day he was stonger and stronger, over the years we did many things, we destroyed a lot, first it started slow with plates and glasses but then i started to kill some animals around the church and the fact that i enjoyed it scared me at first. After i started doing this things i always felt watched, usually i was dizzy and sometimes i started to hear whispers even if i was alone in a room.

Years went by fast if i think about it, like if they were nothing, winters were the hardest because it was always cold and with all the tortureing sure it wasn’t the best thing. I was 18 when that event happned, i still remember every detail. It was summer, the weather was really hot, i was in my room when Devon took control out of nowhere, he wanted me to escape, to be free, to take revenge for every single thing they've done to me. He was right, i had to do something to get out and i wasn’t only gonna do that, i had to kill the priest and burn this place down. That church was what you guys call hell. If it’s hell then it has to burn. All day i wondered through every room in search of gasoline and matches, eventually at exactly 7:45pm i found what i needed, i stared at the objects like they were my saviours. Devon took control again and everything started, i poured the gasoline on every hallway of the church until the priest saw me, he wanted to hit me but i managed to fight him for a while, he was stronger than me so i ran away with the gasoline, i took a hatchet just to know i have something to defend myself with. I lit the match and threw it, i enjoyed the view of this place burning, i felt like i was able to dream again, i felt free and i didnt care who was still in there, the only thing that mattered was the fact that i got revenge and that im finally free. The view was ruined by the priest who was running in the woods. Of course i chased him with the hatchet until i lost him for a minute but then i heard a scream so i went in that direction. the adrenaline was overwheliming, i felt so powerful like i could do anything. After running for like a good 10 minutes i saw the priest dead with his killer getting off of him. The anger i felt in that moment is unimaginable, he stole my victim, the only person i wanted to kill with my hands, he took that away from me. I started running towards him with my hatchet. He stayed still like he didnt care, as i got closer to him i saw that he had the same weapon as me. I stopped and he smiled at me:

-You remind me of myself when i was little.

-I don’t fucking care what i remind you of, you just killed my victim!

-I’m Toby, Ticci Toby, nice to meet you...

- Evon, i said hesitantlly. Why are u doing this?Being nice.

-Thats a rule i have to follow, don’t kill or be rude to other killers.

Thats what changed everything, right after that i saw this faceless man behind Toby, he wasnt scared at all. This creature began speaking to me somehow.

-Child, i can give you a new home and i can let you be who you are, you don’t have to be afraid!

I didn’t have a place to go to so i accepted, i didnt know the training was gonna be so hard and long though. First i had to fight every proxy and that Masky guy left a scar on my face that went over my eye and my eye changed colour, from brown it went bloody red. Then i had to learn how to kill, how to survive, how to run from cops, it was hard for me but Toby helped me a lot. We got close and he took me with him every time Slends would give him a job. He was the youngest before i came in the picture. He told me his story, i told him mine. I had a friend after a long god damn time.

Now i’m 21 and i’m one of the best proxys Slender ever had. Toby is still the best of the best and to be honest he deserves the title. That’s my story. Now that you know it you should be prepared because i might come for u next.

[lineli225]

My FNAF headcanons

So, my headcanon, this text gotta be B I G William headcanons: - William has psychosis and Borderline disorder, idk, I'm still building his mind lol god complex too, etc etc, besides it he is extremely intelligent. - He and Henry met on university :eyes: -Henry actually teached Will everything he knows jkhdjkhsjkd -Henry made SpringBonnie just for Will - Henry boi would make the first animatronics and be the face of Freddy's, while Will would work in the back with the paperwork, so it was like "Freddy Fazbear owned by Henry Emily and a friend" - Will had a crush on Henry and has grown obsessed with him -This crush became hate as he realized that Henry was the only one that was recognized, so Willy got envy as hell -Will went on "if I won't have it no one will" mode and killed Charlie to ruin Freddy's reputation and fuck with Henry -William didn't had a wife, idk, he just don't have shush, his kids spawned in the server -Will is a bad dad- jshjkhjk he was indeed abusive to his kiddos -He only didn't left Eliza play with bby bcs knew that her death would cause a bad reputation and ruin his plans -William has huge empathy issues, but he's not a psycho, maybe almost a sociopath? idk, he can be soft and goob if he try hard, but he is not in the mood -Will killed Charlie bcs of Henry, but he killed the others both bcs Henry tryed to move one and bcs Will noticed the puppet When Charlie gave life to the others will Started to kill exclusively to understand what it is and to become immortal MICHAEL BOI HEADCANONS: -He became a bully bcs of Will terrible role as a father - He didn't bullied Eliza doe, he was just cold to everyone -In days Will would get too moody and hit one of the two lil ones Michael would get them to their bedroom, the 3 would hug and cry together :sob: -Michael actually loved BV doe- -Michael was a shity bro almost all the time bcs he wanted to feel less hated? like- if BV has it worse he could cope? -When Bv died Michael sudenly changed like, wild, he became the good son, he would desperately do anything for Elizabeth and William -Only when Michael went to the under ground facility that he realized his dad wasn't just shitty, so after he became grape boi he went in his mission to fix it all and save the kid's souls -Michael is actually a soft and gentle man, he is bb, and he deserves love -Michael lived his whole life kinda alone- he never had a love, since he was devoted to fix his dad's oopsies BV headcanons: -He cri -idk a lot, I don't rlly like him JHSKASHKDSH - I think his tame is Thobias- - He and Elizabeth has a weird relationship, like, she would be kinda of sarcastic and passive aggressive with him, but they would help each other away -Bv has psychosis and schizophrenia, ya know- mental disorder can be genetic- sadly he was the one who got the worse from his dad's DNA -He be baby

Elizabeth headcanons: -She also doesn't have a great mental state eh eh -She loves William, a lot, she wants to make her father happy - She has obsession problems lol jsdhjaks -She is passive aggressive almost all the time, always defensive and had some personality wracks - She would die for William- like- all she wants is to make him happy - She is just as complex as TFC Baby, so yeah, she's try to be sexy if it meant get what she wants- dummy! -She loved Michael so much, the two had a good relationship, even doe Michael was kinda envy of her bs of her being the "favorite" -Elizabeth and Michael's relation only got stronger after BV's death- but when Elziabeth died Michael went miserable

Henry headcanons: -He has depression -He liked Will like a good friend, he trusted him a lot -Henry never intended to make Will feel left behind, but ya know, u can't change the mind of someone that is paranoid jshaks -Henry tried to make will happy with Springie lol -Henry was so depressed that his life was just making robots -he loved Charlie a lot but he was almost always numb to her and anyone else -Henry discovered it was Will only on the missing children incident, since Him and Will where he only one able to use the suits -Henry attempted suicide mny times, but when he realized he wouldn't die he ecided to chase Will

Vanny headcanons: - She was a happy soft gurl, kinda pastel goth? idk, she loves pink and rainbows - She loves bees and flowers as u guys know sjdhawjksdhs - She likes Luis as a friend, they where kinda close actually - She is not rlly brainwashed? She's kinda of trapped inside of the game while Glitch manipulates her trough words? Until she decide to follow him - She is kinda Stockholm lol she became obsessed with William, and wants to please him, she has a crush on him (he doesn't like her bacc doe, yes, my headcanon is not vanilliam, I like canon :sob: ) -William is abusive  to her, so she became kinda of a bitch? JJDKSJ She started to act more naughty and sassy in a aggressive way to cope with it- I based my Vanny A LOT on Elizabeth from TFC - William has access to all her memories eh eh he uses it to make her go insaneee - Vanny was scared of commit crimes on the start, but she went full apeshit for Will, causing the weird searches she made lol

LUIS HEADCANONS: - Luis is baby, he's soft lil angel and I love him JHJSHDAJKS - Luis and Vanny are friends, that's why he got so worried about her - Yes he has a crush on her, but he is not a weirdo simp, he nice k? - He is kinda dumb sjkhajsks but in a precious way - He acts like Ethan Nestor JSHJKASHKSJK - He has tan skin, black eyes and brown curly hair, he cute and soft - He Brazilian JKASHDJKAWHSJKAHSK

Yes, they all mentally ill, yes Will has a lot of headcanons, yes I think a lot about him, yes I simp JHASJAHSJKSA

[air--bag]

I really don´t know how to start this, or it´s future implications, or if you still use Tumblr, or if you still remember me, or if you´´ll ever see this or if it´s going to be read by someone. But even if this go invisible for  centuries or forever I need to put this somewhere so I can be a bit more free and maybe one day you´ll read this  and finally you will know my feelings for you. (Sorry for the shity grammar and ortography or for mixing spanish words but im kinda lazy and this is really long, so ill just leave it as it its)

I was 13 years old the first time I saw you, it was the second day of school our professor came in when class had already started and in front of him there was a new student, it was indeed someone new. Since the first time I swa you, I knew you weren´t from here, you were so diffren to all of us. We were plain and common stupid suckers that only thought in when to lose virginity and to get waste for the first time in our lives; but you didn´t seem to be that kind of person. you seemed to be quite more deep. THe first time I talked you I thought you were really old and you fucking hated ll of us., it´s kinda of surprising  how close you came to be for me, after that first encounter. We eventually become friends, I don´t know how but it happened and actually you turned up to be really fucking cool I mean you were the shit. .You were like really something else, i mean your overall style, and you were a talented drawer (you are still ive seen some of your shit and tis really great). and yu were a cospayer. So in conclsuion we were lightyears from beenso cool like you... From that first year I don´t remeber to much, just htat you lost someon important in your life, and I still remeber how you didn´t go to school and the night that, with a friend, i went to see you. I kept talking to you during vacations and that made so happy because I fucked it up, but about that I will talkin other part of this text Oh, and I started to listen to bands like Asking Aleexandria and some metal shit that was reallly cool and thank you for  showing me those bands.. So vacations, ended January was realy cold, and for thee very firt time I started to use my hair long. Of course people laughed at me, it was really a messy hair but I kida liked... To this day my har is really important its like my force its on my hair, without my hari I wouldnt be the same. That year we started kind of apart till our firen, that in this text im going to call Jordan, was expelled from school and sso it was you and me. I know that we had other friends like the one that in here im going to call Alfonso, and many oters, but principally it was you and me. One day for some reasin our cases were changed and we had to move to ihter class that was bigger I think. And since i was lucky that Jordan expeleed (dont get me wrong, I mean, i felt bad for Jordan but deep inside of me, to have you for me in the class, was like winning an oscar, the lottery o winning nobel prize) So basically from march to october we sat next to each other, and that march was the beginning of one of the best time s of my life. I remeber how to see you in my left side, focused in whatever you were draing,, that year you started to draw with rapidografos, and actually your were improving, yowere going to more anime conventions, you were improving your cosplays to. That year I started to watch anime, just have some other things in common with you, porbably without ou I wpuld have never seen anime bugt bracause of you I did, and I lied to you saying tat I did watch anime since12 years old or something like that. So I talked to you about your drawings, or music, or anime, or movies, or conspiracy theories, or how you were dying because got varicela, about videogames, about life, about books, about your cosplas, about everthing, absolutely everinght. We laghed, we played with each.. there was a time actually that we played with water and we kinda of enede u wet, we play with our foot, with our hands ( you used to make the triforce symbol with your hands and was a fucking hell to me t do it) we aughed, with the we were becoming really close... You were becming my best friend... I reaally enjoyed to go to scholol beacuse you were going tp be by my side, the morning would end fast and will had the time of my life, and those years I felt really really fine. Prbably without you hat yer would be boring, and I dont knwow , maybe it would´ve been a more difficult year for me. I would got bullied or something like that. But nothing bad happened that year actuallly it was one of the best years. During that time w=you became really close to Dr. dooferschmitz(Im calling him like that, i hope you know who im talking about) and to Monica ( you know, the girl that was best friend of the Dr. dooferschmitz) so I kinda of felt apart, I mean were laughing and stuff but I started to feel afraid that I nothing for you and that eventually you would throw me away,( of course you didn´t do thatt, know its imposiible for me to think of you doing that) and I was afraid of losing you, and that added up with the many new emotiones that I had, my fear and so many other things, made me to epeat my mistake from thae year before, I started to treat you with coldnes, I ingnored you I treated you bad, and to this day I still regreat hat. You were the last persons that deserved that, and I took you apart from me and I don´t know, why I didn´t gave an effort to avoid to hurt you i just don´t know. I fucked it up again...But agin you kinda forgave me, and seriously thank seriously losing you and those moemnts would be a tragedy for e thank you for been so cool for being amazong an for  keep beign my friend. So we kept talikng and beign friends and things become brighter for me again, going to school was my favorite thing in the world this become colorful. You know they say that when youre in love things become colorful and I agree withem, beacause hen I remember those days thers like a feeling that make it so romantic, something in the sun or in the sky or in the color of the walls make those memories really special and beatiu,, even when i was dying of boredom in the church to think that that nex t day I would be talking shit with you made me feel excitedl. My love for you was growing more and more  You were there, you showed me cool music, I was hapy with that music, with the animes you recommended me , and basiclly with life itself. My happines had no end or I thought so. We came out of school , we kept talking almost everyday day as we did in the months before, we talked through skype, i remeber seeing you making some cosplays, you were wearing a dinasour pijama that to this day, I still love, you presented me thorugh skype to shini  and I remeber how it hurted o not talk you, it was a hell to be without you, it was kinda of infectious beacause I came to depend on you its never good in any kind of relation, but yet all that pain was healed when I talked to you again.. But we started to talk less, you moved to another school, I moved to other school, and even though we still talked every now and then, thngs were changingand I did notice that. Things we re becoming gray, life started to be boring, but yet, somehow, my love for you still kept growing, buut that year (2014) we talked almost nothing. There was a day that I saw you, it was tests-week so I came out early and I was going to see you, I remember how my legs were shaking and the hug i gave you when i wsaw you, i threw you my jacket and you thre w it backt to me and th then whe huged like for a minute repeating ecac other how much we mieed us. God, you were so beatiful that day, actually i havent talked about how beatiful you are, I mean you are funny intelligent, bright, clever, how you ended up beign in this shitty city? fuck, youre so beatiufl, I love your light lips, your tiny nose, youre honey eyes, your snowy skin, your voice, your laugh, Iwas stupid in porpuse just to make you laug and the to go to heaven for a few seconds by the power of your laugh. God I really thought you were perfect,its curious because, I knew that there were things i didnt liked from you but at the same time i liked the beacuase those things made youyou, and fuck you were so beatiful in all the posiible ways, metaphsiclly, physcilly you were jus beaitulf, and realy fucking loved you a lo a lo t lot, i dreamed of you, of holding your hand, of kissing you, of sharing life with you, whit brojke the atmosphere and went to the space, ravelled to far away galaxies and was loving you I was just happy and in love I didnt care about anything ese but you. I enojyed to se your face every morning, how you putted your legs on the desk, all your gesture, i loved  the time i holded a part of your body, i loved your smell that to this i havent forget , i remeber how the sun shined and crashed in your hair as in a trigo field. I was so lucky so so lucky, you made everything else beatiful, as if there was some kind of power inside you that transformed everythin around you, to thins day i think that you were a god, and or  wanted to experience human life and so came own to the mortal war and picked anyone to be around with and for destiny reasons i was one of those lyucky basards. You were so different from this shity world. One day you invited me to your house to watch jack frost ovies ( i dont remeber its name) and at some point of that day we were ion your rooftop sitting next to each other, weather, was fresh, sky was blue as an ocean sun was warm and soft, and you were beatiufll, and i felt love and calm, everything was balanced everything, was more than ok, everything.... Life can be cruel sometimes, I think that its part of what makes all of this beaiufl, its tragical factort.... life is like that... our perfect circle ( or at least mine) broke and the only thing that i could do was  accept it and move on, but i never did that, . wel till last year, 2016 was a good year for me and it mean an advance in my life. But every time I finally move on form you I crash with sometihing, I dont know what it its. Something ive been realizing is that I will never forget you, cause what you did in its sobig that i cant just ignore it, everywher i go i will see afraction of your beatiful eyes, every time I love there weill be a part of me, that eventually will thin of you. IYpu fell in love with new people, you trvelled, and I stayed here, and I decided that finaly have to let you go. even though the things you gave to me will always come with me , the beautiness you showe med will always lay in my heart as if its writeen in stone , those beatiful memories will always be inside of me. Enven if as i became older those meories start to blur I kow that in some part of me, those memories will be there, and so you will be. Actually my life  can be seen as a life  before and after you. Before I met you, I was sleepwalking, I woke up, ate my brakefast, came from school, doing nothing during afternoons, going to church in sundays, repeating everything that was told to me, the only human from tha pat me was my desperate effort to fit somewhwere, to be like tthe popular guys, I dressed like them, I tried to be like them bu the real me wasn´t even clse to be like that. The pepole that formed part part of my life was stupid, boring, plain and I hated them. And then theres you, you were a real human, you dressed as you wanted to dress, you llistened the music you wanted to, you didn´t care what the people said, you just were a strong powerful color in the middle of thiss that gray schooI remember how teachers wanted to make you pray, and tried to obligate you  to change yourself , cause they didn´accept anthing that was different to them, and you revealed to them, you sttod up with your beliefs withyourself and ddn´t leet them to denigrate you or to destroy you, you stood p and were yourself and that inspired me. Cause you know I´ve always een a lie, to this day my parents don´t know my sexuality nor that I´m agnostic, they think that Im still that christian boy who loves god and will marry when he graduates from university. Bu actually I´m not beacause you opened my mind, o talk with you, to hear you to see howyou was exciting refreshing, an experience itself it opened my mind, it showed me that theres was world outside waiting for me to l ived it, you showed me that I have a mind and a soul and that Im someone, and that Im a fucking person, that Im a fucking person dude, it ound strange but I didn´t kew that before I met you. You know what´s funny? Thath you weren´t noticing all this things you were transfroming in me, just by been yourself you blosoomed the best of me , Dude I loved you, i really fucking loved you whit all that I had, even if was young, stupid, preteantious I loved you. I loved you I fucking fucking loved you I fucking loveeed you sooo much , My only regret in this life is to be so coward to never took the courage to tell you this and love you even more. Dude thank you for been there when life was shity, thank you for been my best friend whe I was completely alone, thank you for all the fucking great bands that you sowed me, thank you for opening my mind and been one the most influencial things in my ife and to start this fire that become me in the person I am. I know im not perfect and Im not better than anyone, but just to imagine what kind of personI I would be if I would never met you, scares me, I was full of hate and anger while I sleeped and you woke me, you gave me the srenght to move on, you gave me love, lfe, empath, forgivness. Yeah, there were bad times, there were shity things, asi in everything in this world, but there was something inside of me where to hold on. You were my big bang, you gave me a breath of life and since that i been moving on. Thank you dude, seriously. But for now I have to defintily let you go. Ive been trying to move on from you but its kind of impossible if I dont release all my feelings in some way. So I have to let you go. I don´t know what life has for me or for you but I hope its the best for both, and I hoped that you find your way if you havent, I hope that you love someone with all your heart and that someone loves you with all its heart too and that you fly acroos the atmosphere and shine like stars through space and time even after you die... Your light will still shine in this world and in aliens world and the universe will receive that light with love. If you don´t know what to do in life, do as Boukowski said: Find something you love and let it kill you. You´re talentful and intelligent and I hope that you go far in this life. Please take care of you, of your mental health ofr your physical health please, love yoursefl. Dude, always always fucking remeber how beatiful you are, how amazing you are, anhow much love you can give to people. To this day you are one of the most amazing person  I met and  think you will always ben in my list of the coolest persons in the worldyou will always hvae a part of my heart, and wherever I go, whatever I do, I will have you somewhere inside of my heart, that part is forever yours. I loved you a lot a lot.  Im sorry for the shit i did to you, thank you for been an important parf of what saved my life.Thank you for beign yourself, for beign so real, for beign so brave, for beign  amazing. Thak you for beign my first love, I couldn´thave been anymore lucky... I have to let you go, and I have to move. Keep in mind that somwhere, someone will have a part of you inside of him. I hope you the best and I remebered you that i loved you with all my fucking, heart, soul mind, thoughts, with absolutly everything I had,... Dude, all my love and best wishes for you... Goodbye...

[survivor-guyana]

Episode 5 - "Another day, another swap." - Jess

Sarah was robbed.

Please tribe swap, please tribe swap.

Not really sure how to feel at this stage...

Jess absolutely botched this challenge for us, and it was probably the worst individual effort in a competition that I have seen in years. For that, she automatically created a target on her back.

HOWEVER, I need to control who goes here, and it won't be Jess. It sounds like Dani and Nick were on opposite sides of the joint tribal, and will likely target one another.

I would personally like to see Alyssa go sooner than later, but there is no context in taking her out right now. She is "Hosororo strong" apparently, but the tables have turned. I'm not sure if I am willing to give her the same mercy that the favs gave us.

Honestly I wouldn't mind losing this so Mitchell goes home but then again I wouldn't mind Arakaka going to tribal either. I also feel like Nick is fucked over at Takama. He has the idol but that'd require someone using it on him which I doubt would happen. He better up his social game! If Arakaka goes to tribal then it should obviously be Aidan bc of his advantage and bc of Jones, Sammy, and Chelsea/JD alliance. Wait is Chelsea a fan? Lol idk.

So Ive been talking to Maynor and TJ individually about having an alliance of us 3 since I put them both high on my list! They both agreed and so I formed the alliance called... JONES'S ANGELS! I feel like we're gonna be a good alliance as well. Oh José is on our tribe as well as Mitchell. José is someone that I talked to the least on our OG tribe and from the looks of the trust list, someone who is not very trusted. Mitchell has his karma coming from the joint tribal round and for voting out Sarah. (PSST Sarah I miss u queen I can't wait to see you in Survivor Michigan.)

Another day, another swap. I've officially been on EVERY single tribe now. I am Guyana's Orphan. Honestly, I'm actually okay with how we swapped this time around.

I'm in the majority both in several ways. 1. I'm in the majority if Devon and I decide to stick with the "Fans" (barf). 2. I'm in the majority if we decide to go to Hosororo Way (yassss bitch) 3. I'm in the majority if Favourites attempt something (meh).

BUT this bitch is literally her OWN ENEMY RIGHT NOW. I flopped that memory competition harder a nerd at Comic Con trying to talk to a female. YIKES. I hope the flu isn't what sends me home or else I'm going to FUCKING RAGE.

I was able to re-connect with Dani which was okay? for me? I guess? Honestly at this point I have no loyalty to the Fans tribe (I don't think I ever had any tbh). I don't think a label in front of someone's name should stop me from trying to further my game. That being SAID....

Nick is on A WHOLE NOTHER' LEVEL Y'ALL. This man literally knew me for 5 seconds and spilled his whole game. I expected more from a dude who owns a buff personally. The only thing he didn't tell me last night was his social insurance number. I kind of feel bad for him but I don't want to let him get far. I rather keep Dani around than him at this point. I don't want that to hurt my relationship with Alyssa so.. I AM STRESSING RIGHT NOW.

Speaking of Alyssa...

MY GIRL ALYSSA GETTING FIRST.. fucking SCARES ME SHITLESS. I would honestly consider her my #1 at this point but now this has me thinking.. am I really HER number 1? Does she have the same relationship with me like she has with others? If we merge does she have my back over people like Jones/JD who she speaks HIGHLY of to me? I have my doubts but I think having someone like her on my side in this crucial time is an ASSET. She is VULNERABLE and I need to make sure I make her feel as fucking comfortable as possible. It's times like these where those strong relationships form and I honestly think if we can possibly

That's my bitch, that's my girl. I honestly think Alyssa is my gate-way drug to the Favourites at this point. I also really just want to meet Jones because I'm convinced she's my future best friend.

Something I haven't touched on.... ever BUT I can't wait to possibly re-connect with TJ. I miss being able to strategize with him. The way he sees games is insane and I have a half of a brain cell so it's always nice to have a smart person do the thinking for you.

I NEED TO FIND A FUCKING ADVANTAGE OR A GOD DAMN IDOL.

I cant believe we won immunity. I was really scared that we would have to go to tribal. Me, TJ, and Tim made an alliance called Jones’s Angels and i cant wait to be reunited with Jones. Mitchell is acting like last vote wasnt against me but it was like. How can you say theres 100% trust when there isnt. The Jenna vote was not  as much of a suprise for Mitchell cuz i mentioned my worries about Jenna. Im being buddy buddy but if we lost next round. He is going home for sure. Once you brake my trust, you cant really get it back. Sorry mitchell buddy. And i have eyes on Aidan and Dani. Karma for Sarah is coming.

WOW! That's all I have to say right now. This game is really putting me through the ringer but I'm in it to win it and this fucking tribe swap threw me for a loop. I knew the trust lists would come into play but I didn't know right away. But I sort of made such a power move on my tribe and then got shuffled into this and I saw the numbers and went FUCK.

Like four favorites versus little old me! But I like a challenge... I'm not Sarah, I'm not going to let myself get swapfucked. *gives the camera a shady look*

Having the Opal Idol in my pocket is amazing and I'm glad I went for that temptation. Everyone knows I have it but honestly I think there's an advantage to standing out. I feel like this series is used to a lot of UTR, lowkey players and people lying low and that's just not my thing... I honestly can't lay low to save my life. So my plan is to go after them. Honestly since I was low on the trust list it makes sense to go after people high on the trust list. I'm honestly not that bitter but if I can use it to justify targeting some people, I'm going to do it.

I'm not sure of my tribe because everybody is meh so far? I don't know if I'm dry or they're just all in alliances but I can't get a read on them for shit. I saw how well they all did in their past games and JD is giving me this loner act but she's been to an FTC so I know she's not as dumb as she's letting on. For some reason the fact that there are more girls than guys concerns me because I feel like those bitches could link up?

I guess I like Chelsea the best but maybe that's because she seems a little more exciting. Sammy does too but he seems like a game threat. I think I'm reluctant to share anything with anyone because I'm not sure of their relationships with each other. I think I want Jonesy out though... she has this cutesy act that is relatable and did pretty well on her first season. She was high on the trustlist too.

In all... I feel isolated but not intimidated.

Nobody has asked about the temptation but I'm ready to lie about it being a vote steal like I told Dani and Mitchell. I need to start keeping my lies in order because they're going to be PISSED when I reveal what it really is but hopefully they understand... if I ever see them again. I'm worried about Dani AND Jess over there at Takama because Devon is crafty. They are some people I hope I can rekindle with at merge. I'd consider working with Maynor but he seems like the type to want revenge.

WE WINNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNN fuck yeah also i wanna elaborate on something i said in my last confessional about using Aidan as a shield bc idk if I ever explained that Aidan has proclaimed that his tribe did not trust him at all, AND he has an advantage, right? so obviously, people would want to vote him out because of it. HOWEVER, if I get him to trust me/on my side, not only can we work together, BUT everyone will always target him over myself, so yeah, logic ;)

Unfortunately we didn't lose and just as I feared Nick's tribe lost. Welp you had a good run Nick.

So this round has been messed up.  I was swapped to a tribe with 1 person I talked to breifly on our original tribe and had an alliance with to search for idols.  The other 3 players were all people I never spoke to.  Furthermore Dani even voted vote for a few tribals ago.  After a botched challenge I’m hoping that it’s going to be Dani tonight and not me.  I’ve spoken with Jess and Devon and get good vibes that they want to play together.  Let’s hope their not playing me.

So pretty much I’ve been able to establish a strong relationship with Maynor this game... now I just need a majoritu on this tribe to be able to cause some damage within the merge, so we’ll see how things go when I reach that phase 😤 I want to work with TJ tbh, but we’ll see how that goes I guess haha

Ugh I hope Jess and devon aren’t ducking with me but I think it’s me or nick. Really hoping it’s nick. Sorry for typos drubk

Ummmm, so what did i do? Nothing, what have I done? Nothing, I didnt do the challenge ether cus like, wow I do not have a shity memory. But we won so yay team! 

[mochhio]

Tagged by @spiderlocker ~ <3 

rules: answer the question in a new post and tag 20 blogs you would like to get to know better

a - age: 18 >:v

b - birthplace: mekishiko shiti

c - current time: 10:51 pm 

d - drink you last had: my own saliva + something acid while i was choking @ the dentist lol

e - easiest person to talk to: the waifu, which one? You don’t know, you’ll never know, all of ‘em, at the same time

f - favourite song:  hrrrrrrg no pls, for songs i can’t pick, but my favorite piece is La Campanella by Franz Liszt *fancy*

g - grossest memory: once in second grade some girls lifted my shirt and exposed my chest eww

h - horror yes or horror no: only if i’m not alone >:^)

i - in love?: i have a crush on everyone and their cousin, so idk what is love? baby don’t hurt me, don’t hurt me (no more)

j - jealous of people?: ye

k - killed someone?: they can’t suffer if they’re dead

l - love at first sight or should I walk by again: walk by again bitch (x2)

m - middle name: gabriela

n - number of siblings: 4 ñ_ñ

o - one wish: sounds so weeb but i want to go to JAPAN (but to study molecular engineering and genetics <3)

p - person you called last: my mum to come pick me up

r - reason to smile: learning a new word, my pup, my ships, KUBO AND YAMAMOTO COMING OH YAAASSSS

s - song you sang last: i was on a road trip for hours so BOI did i sang today (but the last one i think was bohemian rhapsody) 

t - time you woke up: :’) 5:30 am to arrive early at school and watch voltron

u - underwear color: black as My Soul™

v - vacation destination: canada, australia, corea, probs, but i also want to know more of my country first <3

w - worst habit: popping my pimples, not taking care of 

x - x-rays: yeeee, recently i had to have some done thanks to certain horse...

y - your favourite food: NO PLEASE IM BEGGING YOU 

z - zodiac sign: cancer, my moon sign is cancer, my memes are cancer, so yup, i’m pretty much 100% cancer

@andy-quick @nightreii @glowyskull @mizore-is-watching @fluffytone :3c would you like to answer this?

[335corp]

- 14/03/2017 - 

Blog rewrites:

My own: 

With immortality still out of grasp, Max Staples is a man looking to live on in the memories and hearts of others. He aspires for his legacy to linger long after he has expired.

He wants to make his mark, and people who make their mark on the world, follow their passions. What Max is most passionate about is visual design and video games.

Whilst he is a talented graphic designer and is quite versatile when it comes to digital design, where Max finds himself excelling is in the realm of 3D and game design.

As an avid gamer, Max’s appreciation for games goes well beyond how cool the graphics may be. Ask him about his favourite games and he will give you an in-depth critique on the mechanics of gameplay, the narrative and how it may fair in multi-player mode.

In relation to the Digital Studio 2 project, Max’s skills have so far been utilised in developing the overall concept of the game. With his knowledge of good gaming interfaces, Max has produced wireframes for the games UI and is in the process of utilising his gaming network to conduct user-research and test some the assumptions the team is looking to test before we deep dive into the build of our marketing collateral.

In addition to his Max, much like myself will be supporting Upen in producing our game ‘teaser’ with assistance in developing the storyboard, working out logistics like location/s and props as well as post-production and animation.

Kirs:

Chapter  one 2 week ago It’s a  Friday night at least that's what i though it's  a full bar this bar only get crowded on Friday night and weekends, mostly in the  weekdays it's almost empty . I don't keep track of time any more it's feel the same for me now . The bear that i bought it's getting warm i better finish it but i couldn't enjoy it as i used to.this thoughts and questions about my life ,about me and” what i'm gonna do? “ filling my head to a point it's feel like a physical pain . 

 Current time (first day of uni) I can feel a bit relief but it's a new life and new responsibility it made me bit nervous too. In my head so many things going so many expectations so many questions but in my heart i know what i'm doing is right. there is almost 300 meter between me and uni my ,my legs are walking faster that usual mostly because i'm anxious or seven eleven selling better coffee than i though. 

 2 weeks ago  (in the bar) The pain it's turning into a headache , I thought getting drunk will help but not it's just cost me 20$. “Fuck “ my job, i know I'm going get unemployed in few days. im searching for new jobs for this past few week i don't  have to say that it didn't go well otherwise i won't be here. Now i have to worry about that too. Finally my friend showed up.as soon as i saw him i smiled at him and get over with the common courtesy like “ hi mate   “ ,“how r u “and all other bull shit.

 Current time (first day of uni) I can see the black door of billy blue good thing i came with my friend to open day otherwise i would    spend like one hour just to find it there is no board or any thing ,if there is no google map i for sure never find this place. Finally i got in then i remembered about the shity elevator that take for ever to go anywhere, there like 5 other people are waiting when i walked in.as soon as i got in the metal door opened.it felt like a sign like im doing something that i'm met to do.

 2 week ago  (in the bar) I can see so many empty beer glasses i don't know how many i hand but we are well above the limit. 20% people in world are considered as above average intelligent, but my friend is not one of them to be honest i though he's below average intelligent but the last 6 words came out of his mouth made me rethink everything i know about him . He asked me “why don't you go to uni” one sentence became the answer to all my questions . 

Current time (first day of uni) “ting” the door opened .we all got out as soon as the door opened i rushed to left side of the elevator even tho i have no clue where is my class . I went straight to the student support and ask where is my class and i went to class straight to class . Is this Worth it  i will find out in 2 more years

Upen’s

I believe my unique viewpoints and creative approaches will be beneficial to not only the team in the early concepting stages of the project, but also provide valuable insight and direction later on in it’s development with my skill to back myself up.

A long time ago I worked within my schools media team. During this period I worked on many projects that got a wide array of responses from our audiences. These responses spurred me onto seriously considering this as a path for my future, however the current opportunities at that time in my current country were limited, so I decided to take the jump and set my sights on Australia.

Coming from a different culture with overseas experience I had a unique view and creative approach that gave me an advantage in my work. These unique attributes I brought with me however divided my audiences, with them either loving me work or hating it. Though I would say this is far from a negative. Being able to bring out such strong reactions from people, leaving lasting memories of my work and not just forgetting about it a day later is a great ability to have.

As far as my own skill go I believe myself to be quite proficient in a number of disciplines such as illustration, both 3D and traditional, 3D modeling, photography, cinematography, animation, and a good understanding of the fundamentals of  most industry standard application which should be use