#u absolute buffoon

[still-breathing-au-p3r]

He’s walked through this door what feels like a million times already, but Akihiko finds himself hesitating outside of Shinji’s room today. He’s struck with the terrible, paralytic notion that yesterday was just a dream, and that when he walks into the room he’ll find Shinji unconscious and unresponsive again. 

It’s an absurd idea to even entertain, let alone be so afraid of, but– he really doesn’t know what he’d do if that ended up being the case. 

Akihiko’s wrestling match with his own irrationality is interrupted when he realizes he can hear voices coming from the other side of the door.

One of them belongs to the lead doctor for Shinji’s case, talking about– something. Akihiko can’t quite make out what he’s saying, but he definitely catches the response. 

“No, nothin’ like that.” Akihiko would be able to recognize Shinji’s voice absolutely anywhere, in less than a heartbeat. He knows it every bit as surely as he knows his own.

He leans against the wall and finally lets go of the breath he’d started holding. 

Shinji really is awake. Akihiko hadn’t imagined it out of pure desperation.

Now he has to actually work up the nerve to open the damn door. It’s been all he could think about from the moment he’d left the hospital last night until this exact moment, but now suddenly the idea of speaking to Shinji seems as daunting as a title match. It’s never felt that way before. 

Yet another thing Shinji would laugh at him for. He’s amassing a collection.

Well, since Shinji’s doctor is here, Akihiko figures he ought to be polite and knocks instead of letting himself right in. When he does, the muted conversation on the other side of the door grinds to a halt.

“Who in the world could that be this early?”

“‘S probably Aki. Dunno anyone else who wakes up at the a– the crack of dawn like he does.” 

He exhales, a small smile tugging at the corners of his mouth. Just hearing Shinji’s voice again smooths down some of the prickling edges of his nerves. This can still be salvaged. 

Hopefully. 

“You can come in, Sanada-kun.” 

Akihiko steels himself before he opens the door, and he still feels nearly bowled over when Shinji’s eyes meet his. Seeing them open yesterday was emotional enough when Shinji could barely keep them focused. Now his gaze is alert and aware, fixing on Akihiko with the keen scrutiny that he’s come to find so familiar– it’s almost overwhelming. He very nearly chokes, though at least this time the universe shows him a little mercy and he doesn’t make any embarrassing noises.

“Uh–” God. He needs to get a hold of himself. “Sorry for coming by so early.” Akihiko shuffles inside and closes the door behind him.

Shinji snorts quietly and looks away. 

“It’s no trouble,” The doctor replies mildly, though Akihiko has a feeling he’s a little annoyed at being interrupted. “We can continue this conversation later then, Aragaki-kun?”

“Sure,” Shinji shrugs lightly. Akihiko has no idea what they were talking about, and it’s really not any of his business to ask. He steps out of the way and takes a seat in a nearby chair, as the doctor takes his leave to give them some time alone. Akihiko appreciates it, even if it does feel a little awkward at first. 

“Never known you to be so sheepish.” Shinji’s voice cuts through the silence.

“Never known you to censor yourself like that,” Akihiko shoots back immediately. Despite the circumstances, all he’s been through these past two weeks, all his apprehension and hope and the nausea-inducing slurry they’ve blended into– despite everything, it’s still as easy as breathing to slip right back into their familiar, bickering rhythm. 

“Yeah well, the doc doesn’t appreciate ‘profanity’ in his hospital.”  Shinji rolls his eyes. “His words, not mine.” 

“When has that ever stopped you before?” 

“When he’s got the same glare as Sawashiro-san.” 

“He can’t be that bad,” Akihiko laughs. Out of all the matrons who’d been at the orphanage, Sawashiro-san had been the most intimidating by an oceanic margin. She’d practically been a boogeyman to the younger kids– and the older kids, however much they would have denied it. She had never been cruel, at least not in hindsight, just ruthlessly strict. And after all this time, even Shinji still can’t say her name without an honorific.

“Go ahead and try swearing around him then,” Shinji returns. “See for yourself.” 

Akihiko folds his arms and scoffs amiably. He will not be doing that.

He feels so much more relaxed now than he did when he first walked into the room. He wishes he could keep things like this, continue to bask in the simple camaraderie of nostalgia.

He knows he can’t.

[next =>]

[nattikay]

holy crap y’all I beg of you to please learn what metaphor is; METAPHORICALLY COMPARING SPIDER’S SITUATION TO THAT OF A STRAY CAT IS NOT THE SAME AS LITERALLY CONSIDERING HIM A “PET” for pete’s sake you absolute buffoons

honestly the argument in general that “Jake is a bad dad to Spider” feels so bafflingly pointless to me because Jake is not Spider’s dad. He has never been Spider’s dad*. The Sullies did not adopt/raise Spider. Nor were they obligated to.

Now, would it hypothetically have been very kind/compassionate of them to take him in? Sure! Of course! Absolutely! But can we please stop acting like they specifically were obligated to do so moreso than any other adult in Spider’s life and that therefore not doing so was a massive parental failure on their behalves?

*you can of course speculate that Spider will be taken into the family after/at the end of WoW, but this post refers to the time before/during the movie

[zuzu-draws]

my brain is idea-ing and i'm afraid yall won't be able to handle it. (if i do it right)

[twelvemonkeyswere]

"I feel so sad by the fact my body language is so limited" SKILL ISSUE

[opheliasam]

if misha was just a little bit smarter he would have known to rally for sastiel . ESP post s9. It would have happened too girl (when in rome influence saga)

[lanaevyssmoved]

gale with afhiri: exhausted (affectionate)

gale with my sorcerer: exhausted (derogatory)

[deadn30n]

❝    oh  wow,  hey!  didn't  see  you  there!  listen...  can  you  do  me  a  favour  and  pretend  you didn't  see  anything  just  now?     ❞    Ezreal's  expression  is less  than  convincing,  and  if  she  pays  close  enough  attention,  she  can  see  the  fairy  court  prince  trying  to smuggle  something  behind  his  back.  just  what  is  he  up  to now?  can  he  stay  out  of  trouble  for  even five  minutes  anymore?  apparently  not.     ❝    you  can  do  that  for  me...  right?  right?  right!  haha...    ❞ / starter call for @goddessrisen ♡

[hearts401]

i hate funtime foxy actually <- keeps dying

[perpetualnovelboyfriend]

except I am the world's weirdest mommy blogger

can't wait to tell my 60+ followers what developmental milestone Una has hit this time

[grand-theft-carbohydrates]

[extract: cao cao is bisexual dot jpeg] “Ah, Cao Mengde is here!” Dong Zhuo exclaimed, “son, this is the promising young fellow I was telling you about.” 

“Oh, so this is he?” Lu Bu murmured, making a show of looking him over. He stalked a languid circle around Cao Cao, his fingers tapping leisurely on the jewelled pommel of his sword. He wore soft-toed riding boots, and his gait was unnervingly quiet, reminiscent of a leopard Cao Cao had seen once in a menagerie. All that coiled, deadly strength, trapped in a too-small cage. His voice, likewise was a low, throaty, growl as he remarked lazily, “the honour is mine, to be sure.” 

“Tales of your valor echo far and wide, General Fengxian,” Cao Cao made a show of being star-struck—not that he needed to try particularly hard. Call it a foible, but he found handsome, arrogant men as impressive as they were annoying. “As the saying goes; ‘amongst men, Lu Bu has no equal. Amongst horses, Red Hare.’” 

Lu Bu preened “so they’ve been talking about me behind my back, have they?” 

“Oh, you don’t know the half of it!” Cao Cao enthused. Greedy Back-stabber, Wandering Demon, Bastard-with-three-fathers —and those were some of the more pleasant ones. ---------- notes: - main inspiration for this was sima qian's writing. ancient china had this very matter-of-fact, almost refreshingly non-judgemental attitude towards homosexuality and/or male-male sexuality. and idk. i guess it's nice knowing history isn't about linear progress, different time periods can surprise you. - it's kind of refreshing to read stuff like "yeah so the court came togather and brutally assassinated the emperor's male lover. not bc we're homophobic btw (most of us have tried to dress like the guy just to get the emperor's attention), but it was bc he was amassing too much political influence" - diversity win! i guess! - my characterisation isn't so much as "who is gay/bisexual" but rather "this is the han dynasty, guys, and we're spending 80% of our time in the army. who amongst us HASN'T had a homoerotic experience?"

[kenonade]

me when the gendered group photos. me when id feel like an imposter. me when i dont fit in either binary me when nothing fits feels or photographs right. why cant i just be conveniently absent

[nirnrootic]

just nerevarine things !

[bcneheaded]

thinking about my tiefling cleric of kelemvor uuuhh tempest domain tav...... thinking about how he secretly thinks its a little funny that his god is kelemvor and his Thing is Electricity. If frankenstein exists in faerun..... he's absolutely read that as a child and was like.... c o o l... but reverse frankenstein.... thinking about my lolth sworn drow tav and how he is technically evil, but not a monster. he's deeply devout to lolth in maybe a like... simultaneously deeper yet Calmer(tm) way than most, and how before he finds out about The Truth (AHEM..) he instantly hates Minthara and thinks of her as a traitor for essentially being a heretic and betraying Lolth (but then feeling a little bad about it later when AHEM AHEM yknow. truths. if only because he's an absolute dummy and despite being evil Lite he also found her very pretty and ambitious and dominant jufydFGD)

also thinking about my half-orc draconic bloodline sorcerer, Roselyn, raised in baldurs gate in a very healthy happy family but ended up very self-conscious and sweet and sincere despite being Very Large and Scary and Strong. thinking about how shes very pretty and soft hearted and stuff but people see a half orc and. Stare. yk. and growing up, she ended up very self conscious about the scales on her face and used to try to cover them up <:' ) ended up anxious because of her magic. the whole ''learn to wield it or literally die'' thing iujghdgdf THINKING about how the big ol amazonian ass woman will literally melt into a puddle if you call her Rosie or compliment her bc she doesnt know how to take it, so she just ends up giggling and blushing like an idiot and then gets internally frustrated with herself jusdhfjdgfdGD 'GODS ROSIE you're sO EASY UGH' yk ykyk gfdgfdhd

thinking foREVER about my dragonborn durge bard, Fel (happy accident, that name).... because...... good route.... lots of praise and ''proud of you'''s. no spoilers jgjfgjfg but my favourite playthru handsdown.... oog

[arodrwho]

the urge to finally watch gomens vs the horrible gremlin that lives in my brain and says that to watch things with [redacted] is most unwise and scary vs that same gremlin in a different hat reminding me that there was Discourse over whether the show should have been made at all morally speaking and additional Discourse over whether s2 should have been made and that is a little bit more than i want to be dealing with on this fine saturday morning so instead im just gonna throw myself in bed & spend several hours watching stargate sg1

[trollbreak]

Committing atrocities against solare as we speak btw

[dare0451]

also theres nothing evil, “small evil” or not, about fucking video game piracy you absolute dipshit. go shake yourself really hard until your brain’s plug stumbles its way back into the electrical socket

Sentencing a guy to prison and then making him pay 30% off of his income for the rest of his working life is literal slavery. Nintendo is evil and we should pirate more.