#typo-panda

[nonetoon]

Hey remember when I used to draw fake minecraft mobs

[blushblushbear]

Hear me out… concubine/consort AU with monarch reader

you'll have to forgive, I'd be open to writing more of this kind of set up but frankly I read this prompt and one dude came to mind in particular.

Utterly humiliating.

Fuyu, worn down and looking the most unkempt he ever had, was being pulled from a dim covered wagon by a chain around his neck and wrists. The restricting runes etched into them glowing, almost as a warning to not resist.

"Come along, fox."

Ornate guards with brutish demeanor were tugging him along, beckoning him out into the blinding sun of the court yard and up the steps of a large palace.

He followed with a look of indignity and a shimmering feeling of rage. He, the once mighty leader of the winter clan, a prisoner to humans. And being passed off like a trinket no less! The emperor who he had fought with managed to trick his way into the upper hand, and Fuyu had been captured. Taken cavity as a victory of his prize.

He was paraded around for a while as a show of the 'great emperor's might', kept in shabby livings and feed off scraps like some god forsaken beast that pompous gloat had tamed.

And now here he was, being given off as a token of 'peace' to some other noble. No doubt another cruel master for him to play trophy for.

As his eyes adjusted, he took the sights of his new 'home' in. Lavish does not do justice to the finery that can be seen even along the front steps into the palace. The stairs were finely crafted; with linings of gold to accent the soft color of the marble, all taking shape into something that mimicked a walk way lined with flowers. The grounds from what Fuyu could see were adorned with vibrant flowers to compliment the stairs.

And as he stepped inside, the finery did not stop. All neatly ordered walls a wash with tastefully placed art. Nothing too gaudy, but meticulous, thoughtful and most of all-- tasteful.

'Well--' thought Fuyu, 'at least this master has an eye for presentation.'

His mind cast back to the shear sickening slop job of decor his previous master had fancied. The most expensive pieces he could find strewn about with little thought or care other than to show off that he had the means to buy it. All money,no decorum.

Fuyu was marched through the halls, deeper into the heart of the palace, and with each new wing he past through, he noticed the themes shifted-- each wing it's own proud individual, but somehow still meshed seamlessly with the wings around it.

Truly the home of someone with genuine refinement.

Still, with each rattle of the chains that bound him, with each time they pulled against the sensitive parts of skin, he knew that this place would still be a prison, no matter how lovingly it was adorned.

As they went deeper, Fuyu heard music drifting in from a distance. And as they drew closer to it, he felt a weird sense of relief and fear. On the one hand, his new master seemed an artistic soul. On the other--- Fuyu was still bound in chains.

He almost felt as though he might be sick as the doors opened and gave way into a cozy yet spacious parlor.

"Your Grace, a present from the Emperor of the Southern Kingdom."

Fuyu was a bit shocked that the one who turned to respond to the guard was the figure who was at the piano. He was assuming that they were simply having someone else play to entertain them. Fuyu was also shocked at how they were shocked-- for when they turned around their expression went from curious and cheery to a look of disgust and confusion as their gaze fell upon him.

"Oh--" They rose and made their way towards Fuyu and the guards that surrounded him, "Oh my-- how.... lovely??" She looked down at him, looking unsure as to what to make of him. "He uh--- he sent... a man...?"

"There is also a letter your grace!" The guard stated, holding up a wax sealed letter and holding out for them. They did not take their eyes off Fuyu, still baffled of what to make of him.

He was just as confused. They seemed more shocked than anything. Were they not told he was coming. They still were looking him up and down as they opened the letter and unfolded it while matter,

"You poor thing, the state of you..."

They then turned their attention to the letter and began reading it's contents aloud,

"For the most Honorable Monarch of the North, I humbly submit this, my most prize position," they made a face reading over that last bit, "A Kistune of a felld tribe from the mountains. This beast has been my greatest triumph and now I share it with you. I thought it fitting seeing as yOU DON'T HAVE A SPOUSE?!" the indignity in their voice made it almost crack, "AND I HEARD THAT KISTUNE MAKE FINE LOVERS?! I PRESENT TO YOU THIS SPECIMEN TO TAKE AS YOUR CONCUBINE?! WINK WINK?!?!"

Well-- that was news to Fuyu as well. And guessing by how they are reading it, his new master finds the insinuation just as insulting as he does. He's not sure if he should be hurt by the fact that they are not honored to have a kistune such as himself as a prize, or relieved.

"HEARS TO LONG AND PROSPEROUS PARTNERSHIP, YOUR BUD THE EMPEROR!" They sighed deeply, pinching their nose "of all the... SERIOUSLY?! Who sends a person?!" they asked turning to their guards and Fuyu. "Unbelievable..."

They leaned down, taking a better look at Fuyu as he knelt before them. He was almost shocked how gentle their hand was as they inspected his grimy face.

"Poor thing... Look at how poorly he cared for you..." They noticed the chain around his neck. "Did he send a key?"

"Uh, y-yes your grace," the guard said, handing them the key as soon as they held out their hand for it, "but are you sure it's a good idea to--"

Click.

"There, that much feel better." They said, unlocking the collar and deactivating the runes. For the first time in a while, Fuyu felt the air on his neck. It almost was a shock how much of a relief it felt. He was still processing his thoughts as this new master held his hand up and unlocked one wrist, then the other. All the while he was taking in the sight of them-- their face was very warm and their eyes so gentle... this was-- definitely not what he was expecting... As they held his hand, they saw how raw the skin beneath those bindings had become.

"Oh, look at your poor wrists..." They leaned in closer and gently touched his neck, "oh, and your neck to--" turning to the guard, "bring me a healer. And tell them to bring dressing for wounds. And you," they gestured to another guard, have the staff draw a bath. He needs on," more examining of Fuyu as they ran their hand across his hair, "hmm-- and tell them to break out the good conditioner. Stand up for me please?" They gestured from him to stand and in a fit of confusion, Fuyu followed their orders. They guided him to spread his arms out and they took a good look at his form.

"Man you're tall... probably not going to have anything that will fit you that well... we're going to have to make due for now, but I'll send someone down to get your measurements after you're cleaned up. Oh, speaking of-- Rose," they turned to a maid who had been standing by in the corner, "have the house staff ready one of the guest rooms-- one of the larger ones."

Fuyu stood there still in shock. What was all this...? Now that all of the staff had departed to handle things, him and his new master were left alone.

"You must be hungry---" they walked over to a table and grabbed a tray of treats and brought it over to him, "Take your pick. Oh, but this is just to tide you over! Don't worry, we'll get a real meal into you of course!"

Their smile was so sweet. Fuyu still wasn't sure how to take this... was it a trick? Or some sort of ruse. He remained in a stunned silence as he looked at the tray, then back at them curiously.

"Go on!" They said with a bit of a laugh, "They won't bite!"

He sheepishly picked up some sort of baked good and started to nibble on it experimentally. It was strange... it had a pleasing enough smell but the taste was--- almost herby? But not quite an herb...

"It's lavender!" they chirped, "You don't have to eat it if you don't like it, it's not everyone's taste." It was now Fuyu's turn to give his new master a semizing glance. They were definitely... a lot better looking than his previous master. Though they were also much more confusing. Fuyu could handle cruelty-- that he was used to-- but such an out pouring of kindness? And to one who looked so feral as he must right now? This must be some sort of trick...

"And once we've got you cleaned and fed and clothed," they started, setting the tray down on a near by table, "we can begin to make arrangements to send you home."

Fuyu froze. In his shock he dropped what he was eating and stared at them wide eyed.

"Send... me--- you... aren't going to keep me?"

"Pff-- what? No!" they chuckled and walked towards him, "Dude, you have kidnap victim written all over you! I'm not going to keep you prisoner here!"

"But... that emperor..."

"Oh I'll just tell him you escaped. And if he tries to come find you-- I can always send you off with some form of protection! I know many a guy, we could probably hook you up with some kind of way to make you untraceable! Besides, your tribe must miss you!"

Fuyu felt a paign of sorrow and bitter rage that was capping a mild panic. After a long silence he finally growled out,

"My clan are all dead... I lead them to ruin like a fool... I have nowhere to go..."

The Monarch's expression turned sympathetic. They came up to Fuyu and took his hand in his.

"You can stay here. As long as you like. To save face, you can be a concubine, but in name only." They took the other hand, pulling Fuyu's attention to their face as they looked in his eyes and told him, "I will never make you do something you don't wish to do. You are free to do as you please here. No chains, no bindings. I promise."

Fuyu left his eyes watering. Such kindness, such mercy... it had been so long since he felt it, and he believed he did not deserve it. But he will accept it. He took their hand in his, lowering his cheek into their palm.

"Thank you..."

They simply smiled.

"Of course. If you're mine now, then I plan to treasure you. NOW! Let's get you washed up. And after that, I can show you my library if you'd like---I have all manner of literature-- you're free to go through it as much as you like of course-- and the--" Fuyu followed as he was dragged once again through the halls, though this time it was gentle and surrounded by excitable chatter.

He still didn't feel he deserved this, but maybe he could grow to enjoy being treasured...

[eukaryotesrool]

Giant Panda

Scientifically known as: Ailuropoda melanoleuca (Ailuro meaning cat, poda meaning foot, melano meaning black, leuca meaning white, black and white cat foot!)

(Look at 'em go!)

AKA: Panda bear, giant bear cat (In the original Taiwenese langague: 大貓熊) avoid using just 'panda' unless other people know what you're talking about, not only does it confuse things with the red panda, but the red panda is more accepted to have that name (however I'd recommend avoiding use of it with the red panda too)

(This species has two subspecies, pictured left: the rarer brown panda/Qinling panda, A. m. qinlingensis, which inhabits only the Qinling mountains. Pictured right: the nominate more well known subspecies A. m. melanoleuca)

Because of their somewhat poorly adapt oringinally carnivourous digestive tracts panda bears get little energy from their herbivorous diet, most of their energy comes from the shoots of bamboo, so they eat a LOT in shoot season (April to August) to be prepared prepared for needing to eat the less useful bamboo leaves.

Some people call them stupid beacuse of this (they are big dummies, just for different reasons) but all I see is a highly adapt animal fill a niche unique to its family and order, their stomachs are made special to eat lots of things very quickly so they can get enough energy, their round faces are full of muscles so that their jaws can crush the hard plant, they are comparable to the vegetarian gorilla in their adpations for a sedentary, low energy, lifestyle.

(Wild giant pandas will sometimes eat meat, fruits, honey, and more, but still favor bamboo)

They end up with a lot of cyanide, from their diet, the lethal dose of cyanide in most unadapt animals is 2 miligrams for every kilogram the animal weighs, adult panda bears weigh 100 to 115 kilograms on average, consuming an average of 54.8 to 66.1 miligrams of cyanide in a DAY, but 80% of it gets metabolized into the safer thiocyanate and then urinated out, the other 20% is dealt with through more minor pathways.

They also totally ARE bears! Here the phylogenetic tree!

(The phylogenetic tree)

They are part of Ursidae, the famioy of bears, but NOT Ursus, the genus containing polar bears, brown bears, Asian black bears, and American black bears, they're as much a bear as the Sun bear is!

But more than that they're living fossils! Having broken off from the common ancestor loooooong ago, they are equally distant from every extant bear due to that.

(Panda bears are solitary in the wild, and make a lot of use of olfactory comunication such as pheromones.)

Some have been angry (?) About the conservation efforts put into giant pandas, folks are starting to point out the obvious bias to cute (or something comparable to cute) and instead of trying to help not-normally-considered-cute animals, some get mad at the cute animals getting protection, no, don't do that, it's ridiculous, we should be doing more to help more animals, not doing less!

The giant panda was considered endangered by the IUCN and China, but has since been changed to vulnerable by both, we've made great strides in helping them, and in helping them we created nature reserves which also help to protect snow leopards, red pandas, golden-snub-nosed-monkeys and more! Plants too!

So don't be mad about what we haven't done, be proud of what we have! And make use of the present time and future to do what we've failed to, no matter how little the contribution of the individual may be, it means something, something glorious.

(More brown pandas! There's something so cool about animals with unusual-for-their-species color palates)

Ah, finally, a normal post.

[lillyorlyracat]

I've decided to make specific tags for a couple of these!! I'll update some older posts of mine with the ones that apply later

But for now, here they are:

✊️Trira✊️ (me and Tribore), 💝Trira family (me and Tribore + our sons)

😺Lilanha🐟 (me and Piranha)

🟣Lyratello🟣 (me and Donnie, either version)

♥️LyRaph♥️ (me and R!Raph)

🦎PolyBoggs (me and Randall and my bf)

🐶Bluey's extended family💙 (me and Bandit/Chilli, and also my bf)

🪐Jupicat🐱 (me and Mako)

🌸CottonMamma🐾 (me and MoominMamma)

🌌Marscat🐱 (me and Marvin)

👓Lilburt🐾 (me and Filburt)

🤖teenagers👽 (me and Jenny)

🎣Crazy Train (me and Minion)

🦺Red Rabbit🍬 (me and Judy)

🦴Snaktooth Sapphics✏️ (me and Triffany)

🐈‍⬛Jinx💚 (me and Loki), 🐈‍⬛🐟💚Loki Poly (Loki and me and my bf)

🪽CraneMiao🐾 (me and Crane, if it wasn't obvious)

♟️Weird Chess🔮 (me and Kinger)

🦷Fangz😼 (me and Caine)

👾Poppex🌸 (me/Poppy and Trollex)

Posts tagged with these will be content related to the ships, whether it just be me gushing about them or art of them or headcanons or whatever; anything goes.

I'm probably gonna add more sooner or later, since there's quite a few still missing. That's future me's problem tbh

Uhh yeah the end :)

THE F/O LIST!!!!!!!!!!!

Okay babies! This is it! This is the f/o list!

This will include almost EVERY SINGLE ONE of my fictional others! This is linked on my pinned post, which is likely where you're coming from. I'll update this from time to time with new skrunklies when they come up and

As for boundaries, I don't have many! If you happen to share an f/o with me, that's really cool, I'm not uncomfortable with that, they love you. If you need to block me because you are uncomfortable with f/o sharing, that's cool too! I totally understand.

Additionally, I am a minor, so a couple of my romantic f/o's are also minors (around my age). They're growing up with me, by the time I'm an adult they will also be adults,,, anwudggx I'm not weird ;w;

One more thing! I have a boyfriend irl who also selfships! It shares a good ton of f/o's with me, so I'll mark the ones we're both dating with a star (☆)

Okay. NOW I can list the characters...

Romantic f/o's

Tribore Menendez (Final Space)

Randall Boggs (Monsters Inc/University)☆

Marvin the Martian (all Looney Tunes media)☆

Roger Smith (American Dad)

Loki (Marvel)☆

Blitzø (Helluva Boss)☆

Sir Pentious (Hazbin Hotel)

Filburt Shellbach (Rocko's Modern Life)

Hawkodile (Unikitty!)

Lord Garmadon (LEGO Ninjago, but specifically the movie. I haven't seen the show)

Jenny Wakeman (My Life as a Teenage Robot)☆

Makoto Kino/Sailor Jupiter (Sailor Moon.. but the og not Crystal.. I don't plan on seeing Crystal)

Judy Hopps (Zootopia)☆

Pleakley (Lilo & Stitch)☆

MoominMamma (all Moomins media, but mostly the 90s series bc i'm the most familiar with that one)

Donatello (TMNT 2012)☆

Minion (Megamind)

Mr. Piranha (The Bad Guys)☆

Rapunzel (Tangled)☆

Triffany Lottablog (Bugsnax)

Bandit Heeler (Bluey!)☆

Chilli Heeler (Bluey!)☆

Invader Skoodge (Invader Zim)

Lard Nar (Invader Zim)

Audrey II (Little Shop of Horrors)

Commander Peepers (Wander Over Yonder)☆

Flo (Splatoon 2)

Rusty Rose (Sonic Prime)

Shawn (Sunny Day Jack)

Thorax (MLP:FiM)

Meta Knight (Kirby)☆

Miscellaneous f/o's that I'm not sure if they're romantic or queerplatonic or what but I still love them

Jevil (Deltarune)

Spamton (Deltarune)

Stripe Heeler (Bluey!)

Escargoon (Kirby)

Spinel (Steven Universe)

Queen (Deltarune)

Rouxls Kaard (Deltarune)

Collin the computer (Don't Hug Me I'm Scared)

There's a lot of deltarune characters in there.. Anyway,

Queerplatonic f/o's

Skelita Calaveras (Monster High)

Hairdresser Octopus/Takoyama (Parappa The Rapper)

Bloberta Puppington (Moral Orel)

Familial f/o's

Quatronosto Menendez (Final Space)

Trequeño Menendez (Final Space OC)

Ickis (AAAHH!!! Real Monsters)

Devil Cookie (Cookie Run)

Megamind (Megamind...)

Bluey Heeler (Bluey!)

Bingo Heeler (Bluey!)

Muffin Heeler (Bluey!)

Socks Heeler (Bluey!)

Ghoulia Yelps (G1 Monster High ONLY)

Beezle (Unico)

Vannelope Von Schweetz (Wreck-It Ralph)

Usagi Tsukino/Sailor Moon (Sailor Moon)

Gilbert, Shellbert, Norbert, and Missy Hutchison (Rocko’s Modern Life)

Orel Puppington (Moral Orel)

Ms. Tarantula (The Bad Guys)

Mr. Shark (The Bad Guys)

Oh (Home 2015)

Ninni (all Moomins media but mostly the 90s series)

Blossom, Bubbles, and Buttercup (Powerpuff Girls)

Bugs Bunny (all Looney Tunes media)

Lock, Shock, and Barrel (Nightmare Before Christmas)

Moomin/Moomintroll (Moomins media, mostly 90s)

Little My (Moomins media, mostly 90s)

Loona (Helluva Boss)

Ma, Pa, and Junior Gorg (Fraggle Rock)

All the other turtles (TMNT 2012)

Platonic f/o's

Every other Bugsnax character

Mike Wazowski (Monsters Inc/University/At Work)

Roxanne Richie (Megamind)

Casey Jones (TMNT 2012)

Callie (Splatoon)

Marie (Splatoon)

Rocko (Rocko's Modern Life)

Mr Hemulen (all moomins media,, specifically 90s,, you get it by now)

Marinette Dupain-Cheng (Miraculous Ladybug & Chat Noir)

Adrien Agreste (Miraculous Ladybug & Chat Noir)

All the Centaurworld characters ever

Every resident of Radiator Springs (Cars franchise)

All the Muppets ever. Every single one of them

Cotterpin Doozer (Fraggle Rock)

Francine Smith (American Dad)

Legoshi (Beastars)

Scootaloo (MLP:FiM)

Apple Bloom (MLP:FiM)

Derpy (MLP:FiM)

Unikitty (Unikitty!)

Kirby

The whole Belcher family I think (Bob's Burgers)

Puppycorn (Unikitty!)

Richard (Unikitty!)

Peridot (Steven Universe)

Dr. Fox (Unikitty!)

Nick Wilde (Zootopia)

Fictionkin related f/o's🔥

Wade 💧

Wade's family <3 💦

Bernie & Cinder Lumen (my parents) ❤️‍🔥

[Note: I haven't met any fictionkin folks who are them yet, but I'd really like to meet Bernie 🥲]

Alrighty! Well, that's all i can think of at the moment... thanks for reading I suppose :)

[chaos-in-deepspace]

LNDS Xavier: Lazy Pandas (18+)

Oh gods I hate editing my work because of the bad grammar and typos, but I wanted to get this out TONIGHT. I have plans on writing one of these for each of the boys. Just those panda outfits are so adorable. But also I am a degenerate so here we are. Enjoy the meal.

Disclaimer: This is an original fan work for “Love and Deepspace”. Do not repost on other platforms or plagiarize. All characters shown in this fic is 18+. Warnings: Tooth rotting fluff, laughing during sex, soft kisses, unsafe sex, creampie, riding, cuddling Pairing: Xavier x Reader Synopsis: You had it all planned, a small date night with Xavier with your new, adorable panda overalls. However after s bit of cuddling you decide to have a bit of play time with your favorite panda boy. Word Count: 3.3k

Blog Information | Masterlist

Xavier

Lazy Pandas

“Oh my goodness, you look adorable!” You said, looking at Xavier in his current panda outfit. You had seen them in store a week ago and knew you needed to get a matching set to wear with him. It was totally worth it as you took him in.

He already had that soft boy aesthetic going for him, so dressing like a panda was just a cherry on top. You had to fight with yourself not to coo over how adorable he is, knowing he would either turn it right back on you, or get all pouty.

“You look rather cute as well.” He said, scratching his cheek as he looked away from you for a moment before turning back. You had the slightest blush on your cheeks from the compliment. No matter how many times he gave you compliments, it never failed to turn you into a blushing, and sometimes giggling, mess.

He paused for a moment as though thinking, then turned back to you with a small, relaxed smile, “Was there a reason you wanted to wear these tonight?”

“There is always a method to my madness, Xav. Take a good look around!” You said, moving to show him what you did to his living room. You had literally rushed to his apartment the moment he got home with this plan in mind. While he showered and got changed, you got to work.

Xavier seemed to finally notice the tornado that went through his living room. Every single pillow and blanket he owned was currently stashed on the floor. You had even moved some furniture around to make more room. It was a perfect little nest which included several plushies he had gotten you in the past.

There was also a small tray of finger foods that wouldn’t be too messy. The TV flickered with a movie series title on display, one that you had mentioned you wanted to binge with him. You had made it the most cozy movie date ever, outfits included.

“Besides, isn’t matching fun?” You asked, shuffling a bit. Your hands went to the overall pockets as you looked around, hoping he’d like what you did.

“You’re right, it is rather fun. I can’t recall the last time I had a movie marathon like this.” He said, giving you subtle praise and you preened from the attention.

You grabbed onto Xavier’s hand, pulling him closer to the little nest you had practically built for the two of you. It was easy to drag him down with you, getting comfortable in all the fluffy blankets he owned. This is why you had to do this at his apartment. He was a collector of the comfiest blankets and pillows known to man.

It didn’t take long before you had turned the movie on and you two got into a comfortable silence as you watched. The movie wasn’t particularly a good one, but it had five movies in the series and could be considered entertaining to some extent. Xavier commented about never having seen them though, so you knew you two had to experience it together.

As the movie continued, reaching the halfway point, you couldn’t help but roll over until you bumped into Xavier’s side. Said man had a cracker in his mouth as he looked down at you. He swallowed what was in his mouth before smiling at you, “Need something?”

“Cuddles.” You stated simply, knowing exactly what you were about right now.

Xavier’s arm went over the top of your body, dragging you in closer and tucking your body against his chest. He carefully angled it so you’d be able to see the movie, but soon realized your neck might strain a bit to see the screen.

Xavier easily wrapped his arms around your midsection before rolling onto his back, letting your body nestle right on top of him. You let out a soft grunt from the position change until you realized you could now lay your head right on his chest.

“That better?” He asked, his arms still securely wrapped around you.

“Ya, but now you’re watching the movie upside down.” You said, noticing how he laid his head down and stared over at the TV.

He took a moment to look at you before his eyes flicked back over to the movie, “I don’t mind watching it upside down if I can hold you like this.”

You swore your heart fluttered at his every word as you got comfortable in the newest cuddle spot. It couldn’t have been ten minutes when your gaze went back down to your boyfriend. He looked so focused on the movie and you thought about how he looked adorable like this. How a man could look cute from every angle was one of the many mysteries of the world.

“Hey Xav.” You called, getting his attention. He looked up at you just in time for you to give him a gentle kiss right on the tip of his nose.

He blinked a few times in confusion before a lax smile spread on his face, “You missed.” He commented.

“Oh, my bad. Lemme try again.” You said, this time going to press a kiss to his forehead. You watched his eyes pinch closed as you did so and you chuckled, sitting back up on him again.

“You still missed.” He said and you rolled your eyes. You then leaned over, kissing both his cheeks then gave a satisfied smirk.

“I think I did good that time, right?” You asked him, tilting your head innocently. Xavier’s hands on your hips gave you a small squeeze, making you squeak in surprise. You then felt one of his hands going to cup you under the chin as he brought you down to him.

After placing a barely there kiss on your lips, he moved your face away, “There, that’s better. Perhaps we should take you out training since your aim seems a bit off today.” He suggested.

You gave him a dramatic eye roll and pushed his chest down, “My aim is just fine, thank you.”

You shifted again in his lap to get comfortable before you noticed something underneath you. It was subtle through the layers of clothing you had between you, but it could really only be one thing.

“Xav…did you get hard from that?” You teased, shuffling your hips to get a better feel for his erection underneath you.

Xavier let out a small groan before looking away from you, a slight dusting of pink went across his cheeks, “I can’t help it, you were squirming a lot.”

You just laughed at how cute he seemed to be. You used your arms to help keep you steady as you went to grind down on his length. You hated how you could barely feel him through the fabrics, knowing just how good his dick felt when it was pressed against your bare skin.

Xavier’s hands went back to your hips, stopping your grinding motion, “W-what are you doing?” he finally managed to ask after shifting under you so you wouldn’t be directly on top of his length.

“Take a wild guess, panda boy.” You said, trying to move despite his iron-like grip on your sides. Sometimes you hated how strong he was in comparison to you.

“You can’t even give me a proper kiss, yet you want to use my body?” He asks with a small pout. You snicker at his expression before placing a hand under his chin.

“Well get up here and kiss me properly…and for the record you were the one who got turned on first. I thought pandas were supposed to be lazy.” You teased the man under you. Xavier didn’t hesitate to sit up and reposition you two so you straddled his lap.

He leaned in, pressing his mouth against yours and you happily melted into his touch. His lips were always soft and you briefly wondered if he ever used chapstick, or if he was just naturally lucky. A small pinch to your hip brought you out of your random thoughts.

Xavier placed a small kiss to the edge of your mouth, “Perhaps it’s mating season for this panda…” He commented, and you swore if you kept rolling your eyes they’d end up in the back of your head at this point.

“If that’s true, then did my cute panda boy want me to ride him?” You asked, wrapping your arms around his shoulders as you pressed your chest up against him.

Xavier’s eyes widened for a moment at your blunt question before he let out an amused laugh, “You certainly don’t shy away anymore.” He joked.

You couldn’t help the pout on your lips, “Well if you don’t want me to then…” You went to stand up, but Xavier’s grip wasn’t letting you go anywhere.

“Now I didn’t say that.” His hand went to cup your cheek, “You just caught me by surprise is all.”

You did a small happy shimmy as his acceptance, your laughter mingling with his. You then decided you were tired of not being able to feel him properly.

“Let’s get these overalls off of us then. They’re too thick.” You said, snapping the one shoulder piece Xavier had off and letting the top of the overalls slide down, pooling at his waist.

Xavier was more than happy to get out of the pants, lifting his hips as you helped push them off of him. It was your turn to be surprised as you noticed his cock was sitting there, hard and leaking onto his abs. The hoodie was pulled up just enough so it wouldn’t make a mess and your hand trailed over the vein on the underside.

“You went commando?” You asked, hand wrapping around his length, and using the bit of pre he had on his tip, began stroking his cock with ease.

Xavier let out a groan, relaxing on his elbows as he looked at you, “Well it was a bit warm so I decided it would be fine.” He said, hissing when you pressed a bit too roughly on his frenulum.

“So you didn’t have this planned?” You asked, pretending not to notice his small wince as you teased him with the slightest amount of pain. Your thumb rubbed soothingly over the skin as you went back to stroking him normally.

“It certainly wasn’t in the plans when I put…this on. Figured you weren’t about to suggest panda roleplay.” He said, his head thrown back suddenly as he moaned as you picked up your speed.

“Ya, not something I’m into…but you know you do look cute in this hoodie. You could totally rock wearing this thing out casually.” You said, your hand twisting as you gauged how he was reacting.

“Mhn, I’ll wear it out only if you-hah-match w-with me.” Xavier managed to get out through moans. You could tell from the twitch of his cock that he was getting close.

A large hand wrapped around your wrist stopping you from stroking him further. He took a few seconds to breathe, calming himself down from reaching his peak, “I thought you wanted to ride me? If you keep this up you’ll have to wait a while.”

You gave Xavier a flirtatious smirk, leaning forward and giving him a quick kiss, “Fine, I’ll stop, only because if we don’t hurry we’ll miss the ending of the first movie.” You said, glancing up at the screen where the movie continued playing.

Xavier huffed at your attention, watching as you easily slid off your own overalls then tossed your panties next to you. You effortlessly got into position, lining his dick up with your entrance and rubbing it against your slick folds.

After watching you for a moment, Xavier gave a small frown, “I thought you were going to ride me, not tease me.”

You shoot him a wink before speaking, “If you ask me nicely I’ll happily ride you, panda boy.” 

Xavier let out a sigh as he leaned up, capturing your lips with his own then pulling away, “Will you please ride me, starlight?”

You leaned in again, kissing him slowly as you began sinking onto his length. You let out a small moan into his mouth, loving how he stretched you. He always felt so right inside that you practically dreamt about it all the damn time.

You finally got him hilted in you, his cock twitching already. You moved his hoodie up to get a good look at his abs, licking your lips as you got balanced and angled just right. Xavier’s hands went to hold your hips, but you were quick to slap them away.

“Nuh uh, if I let you hold onto me, you’re gonna control the pace, mister. You just strap on in and enjoy the ride.” You scolded and Xavier groaned, rolling his hips into yours and making you gasp, “H-hey, no fair.” You grumbled.

He chuckled as he got back on his elbows, staring up at you seated so perfectly on his cock. You looked like his lap was your own personal throne, and he wouldn’t have it any other way.

You began lifting off of him, taking your pace as slow and relaxed as you could. You were savoring just feeling him inside of you, how his cock grazed your warm walls every time you sank back down on his length.

“That’s better.” You said, lazily rolling your hips as you continue riding him at your agonizingly slow pace.

“My star, as amazing as you feel, do you think you could…” He trailed off and you tilted your head in mock confusion.

“Could I?” You said, sitting down on his lap fully and waiting for him to tell you what he wanted.

“Go a bit faster?” He huffed out.

You gave a small hum in response, thinking it over, “I dunno Xav, I am just a lazy little panda. I don’t know if I can go much faster than this.” You teased, your hips barely moving as you gave a few shallow strokes.

Xavier let out an annoyed groan, letting you continue to antagonize him for a few more minutes. After he realized you really had no intention of picking up, he rolled his hips up into you harshly. You let out a gasp, almost losing your balance as your hands all but slammed down on his stomach, making him grunt.

You looked up to see him pouting which made you chuckle. Your hands found his cheeks, squishing them together and forcing him to look at you, “Xav, you gotta be patient.” You chided and he just looked away for a moment, his face scrunched up in thought.

His hands went to cup your own, removing them from his cheek as he gave you a heated look, “This panda doesn’t feel like being patient right now.” He commented.

Suddenly his hands were lifting you up and off his lap. In an instant you had been flipped onto your back, Xavier hovering over you as he grabbed two pillows. He placed one under your hips and the other under your head before lining himself up, “I think I’ve been patient enough as is.”

He hoisted both your legs up, wrapping them securely around his hips then entered your warm heat again, groaning at how your walls clenched around him.

“Such an impatient panda.” You teased, chuckling for a moment before it morphed into a long, drawn out moan as he managed to hit your sweet spot within the first few thrusts. Xavier didn’t waste any time picking up a pace that would easily have you both coming in minutes.

Xavier leaned closer, pressing you into what felt like a pretzel as his face was right against yours. His soft pants and groans filled the room alongside your own. His hand went between your bodies, pinching your clit and you let out a mewl.

“Xavier, fuck.” You moaned out, rolling your hips along with his thrust, “Not g-gonna last long like t-this.” You panted.

“I’m not doing much better, your edging has me ready to cum any second.” He said, laying wet kisses along the column of your neck.

Your arms wrapped around his shoulders as you took his brutal pace, the warm coil tightening in your abdomen and threatening to spill over with every quick thrust into you.

“Mind if I breed you? It is mating season after all.” Xavier said, despite the husky hint his voice took on, you could pick up his joking tone anywhere. You let out an annoyed groan, letting him know your displeasure before you broke out into a fit of giggles.

“That’s so lame.” You said between your small laughing fit, Xavier wasn’t doing much better as he laughed alongside you, fighting back the urge to cum as your walls squeezed him as you chuckled.

“You didn't answer me though, and we’re running on limited time.” He said, pressing a small nip to your cheek. 

You once again teased him back, “Fine, fill me up, panda daddy.” You got another nip from him with that comment, alongside him pinching your clit and making your laugh turn into a moan. He rubbed soothing circles along the bud as though apologizing for the rough treatment.

That was enough to send you over the edge, the familiar warmth overtaking your body as your walls spasmed around his length. Xavier let out a small gasp, his cock twitching inside of you. He shot ropes of his warm seed deep into your cunt, painting the walls with the milky substance.

Xavier gave a few more languid strokes inside of you before finally stopping. His face was nuzzling your neck as he occasionally placed a soft kiss there. He looked around after a moment, finding one of the fluffy towels you had used to help cushion the nest you made. He lifted your hips up and placed it under your ass as he pulled out of you.

He watched your combined essence dripped out onto it and you bashfully closed your legs, moving a hand over your mouth as you looked away, “Xav, don’t stare…” You murmured.

“I can’t help it.” he said, moving away so he was no longer right up against you. He gathered another one of those fluffy towels, using it to wipe himself down and then gently went between your legs. You gasped at the sudden sensation as you felt way too sensitive. Xavier cooed, helping you relax as he did his best cleaning you up with what he had on hand.

After he was satisfied, he grabbed your underwear that was basically right next to your head. He slipped them back on, hoping it would keep the rest of his release inside for the time being, “There, all better.”

“Are we not gonna shower after all that?” You asked, feeling the slightest sheen of sweet coating your skin. The hoodie didn’t help the cause as you finally sat up. You groaned as Xavier tossed your overalls onto you, the fabric falling on your face then to your lap.

“Our movie marathon isn’t over…we don’t want to miss the ending of the first one, right?” He teased. You rolled your eyes for the umpteenth time that night as you began putting your overalls back on. You looked over to see Xavier was already clothed and ready.

He grabbed onto your waist and pulled you closer. This time you were both on your stomachs, his arm securely around your back as he grabbed pillows for your heads. You watched Xavier give a small yawn as he tried focusing on the movie, but with how zoned out his eyes seemed to be you knew he wouldn’t be conscious for long.

“Gonna nap?” You asked, tilting your head to rest against his shoulder.

“Just for a few minutes…” A bold faced lie, “Wake me up when the movie ends, okay?”

“Alright Xav.” You said, turning your head to press a kiss against his cheek. You then turned back with the intent to finish this movie series tonight, no matter how many distractions found you.

[theballadofmars]

Revising what past me wrote in the notes for the future chapters of my svsss fic and I know this is a typo, but I can't stop laughing at the idea of lbh being in a dramatic scene just for sy/sqq to start talking about Kung Fu Panda.

[castleofclouds]

If Nct Dream As A Dream Job.

Disclaimer : fiction, grammatical error, or typos.

Special tags : @1daily2lele7 ^^

Story by ©castleofclouds do not copy or repost

We all have our own different ideas of a “dream future, some people wish to have lived freely, thus there's a saying, “dream jobs, if money didn't matter.” but in dream vers!

Mark As Novelist.

Mark would be a novelist, he would spend a day with his favorite drink by his side, daydreaming about the life of other people, he normally enjoy writing his script in a coffeehouse while enjoying a nice warm bread.

Mark never stays at one place, he always travelling around the world to see the world, he says it's for his research purpose.

He would 100% love writing about fantasy and even romance book, and sometimes he often challenges himself to write another genre that he never write before.

His publishers will really have a hard time based on how free mark as a novelist would be, he would spend weeks to write his first draft and went AWOL the next month just to show up with panda eyes and a complete book.

Renjun As Artist.

Renjun always had passion in painting or just the idea of colors in a canvas, he could spend an hour just to draw doodles at the bottom of his papers, he always seems like a creative and talented person so it's not a surprise.

You could find Renjun on the park, or a garden, drawing people that passes by, as he imagined the life they lead, what is their routine for the morning, do they eat cereals for breakfast or a straight up buffet?

Renjun art are ambiguous, yet full of mystery, so many symbolism you could find just based on his drawing, it looks like his drawing always holds a bigger mystery of Renjun mind, that only few can understand.

He often held an exhibition, showcasing his arts, and it's the most fun of the days, he felt joyous seeing people enjoying his arts, as he inspired others to be like him, an artist.

Jeno As Barista.

Jeno had many talent, he could do well in so many things in life, one thing for sure, he looks good in apron, Jeno as a barista is a dream come true, and Jeno would totally do his works diligently, he is just that trustworthy, you can trust your coffee to him. He will not dissapoint.

Jeno would spend days learning about new latte art, watching it from his YouTube and recreating it on his home, with his cat and enjoying a warm eclair.

Every each of his coffee could brighten someone days, he makes sure to tend to every each carefully, making sure the beans were perfectly measured to taste good.

His cafe never empty, there's always people interested about the coffee he make, and not only coffee he can many more things, just leave it to Jeno, he will find a way!

Haechan As Film Maker.

Haechan love the idea of entertaining other people, than having to entertain himself, he loved the idea of people enjoying what he brings to the table, and if it makes people laugh, he wouldn't asked for anything else.

Haechan never stop searching for another place to set his camera, imagining his actors playing a scene, he could imagine the actors dancing in the middle of the fall, as the leaf fall from the tree, he never stop imagining of what scene will be held next.

Haechan love all kind of movies, he loves romance, and he knows how to capture the essence of what love truly is, either it's a good ending, or an ending with a heartbreak, he will make sure to bring the movies to life, as if the audience were in the film themselves.

He doesn't like the idea of being pressure, so most of his works are singlehandedly by him, sometimes if it means he had to pay for everything he would do it, he will live for today if that's what makes people happy.

Jaemin As Florist.

Jaemin as a florist, is a great combo, both are beautiful and delicate on some many parts, Jaemin always gives off vibes of someone gentle, someone that knows how to take care of others, just like how different plants have different way of care.

He would always waking up the earliest, while cluster different part of the flowers, cutting the stems or the leaf, and he loves making bouquet the most he found joy in that, and he would do it again and again.

His favorite flower are poppy and gladiolus, because that's his birth flower, he thinks the idea of flower base on his month of the birth are pretty, and he loved making bouquet for special occasions.

He works together with some other florists and he love teaching the young about the arranging flowers, on days when he doesn't work he love giving free bouquet to other people.

Chenle As Baker.

Chenle would totally be a baker, he loves kitchen and baking could totally be something he skilled about, baking are his way of showing love, he could bake cinnamon roll and send it to you every time he missed you.

On days when he doesn't stay at his baker, he loves showing support by going to another baker in town, learning about how specific place scone can have different taste than the others startled him a lot.

He could totally be making many kinds of cakes or desserts but one thing for sure he loved making brownies, he had a friend, Felix who teaches him how to make brownies and he never stop making it ever since.

His bakery would always filled with customer, he love trying new recipes every week is a paradise.

Jisung As Astronomer.

It's not a secret anymore Jisung love for space, is bigger than the universe itself, he always found himself wonder about the space and the sky, what could be hiding behind all of those beautiful planets in outer space.

As an astronomer of course he would spend his days watching the stars, times where he is the luckiest are when he saw a fallen stars, he thinks it's a charm for tomorrow, always giddy even found himself smiling from ear to ear.

He spend most of his day at his house, studying about the space, searching for the potential another living creature, he wished one day he could find something much more bigger than the Jupiter itself.

He love stargazing, watching as the star twinkles under the dark blue sky, contrast to the sparkling stars always excited him, and even bringing his own telescope to watch the stars closer.

Masterlist.

A/N

Hi hi, Cassie here how are you? Sorry if lately I didn't post as much as I did, i'm Trying, I wish you could understand that, I will make sure to do my best at my series and more. Hope you have a nice day!

[bearr02]

Safe and Sound |Chapter Six|

Pairing: Hybrid!ot7 x F!Reader

Chapter warnings: Not proofread

Summary: You have worked at a hybrid rehab and adoption center for years, enjoying being able to help people others only see as their animal side. You thought you might end up taking in one or two, what you didn’t expect however, was to take in 7.

Genre: fluff, angst, eventual smut, non-idol au, hybrid au, strangers to friends to lovers au,

Word count: 4.3k (damn I’m proud)

Member’s hybrid types: Namjoon: Bear, Yoongi: Bobcat, Hoseok: Ferret, Jin: Wolf, Jimin: Red panda, Jungkook: Bunny, Taehyung: Marble fox

A/n: I’m sorry for any weird parts or typos, I just wanted to get this chapter out. I’ll proofread it soon, I promise. New memberssssss 🤫 yayyyy

Last - Next - Masterlist

When you wake up the next morning, the cat is still nestled close to you, his head tucked under your chin as one of his paws rests on top of your arm. You smile, scratching his head with your free hand.

The sound the cat makes borders between a meow and a purr (Y’know how cats do that? Or is it just mine?) as he stretches the leg that was previously resting on your arm. “I need a name for you, buddy.” You mumble, running your hand from his hand down his back. The cat picks up his head and looks at you through tired, lidded eyes before laying his head back down, this time on your arm.

You smile, scratching behind his ears before reaching for your phone. The cat huffs at the loss of your hand, rubbing his head along your arm. You giggle, scratching his head making him purr. You pat his head softly before slowly removing your arm from him and taking the blanket off of you, standing up.

The cat huffs again, turning to look at you with a glare. “Sorry, buddy. I’m hungry.” You say with a pout. The cat huffs again before curling into a circle. You give him one last pat before making your way out of your room and downstairs to the kitchen.

—

As you sit on the kitchen counter, scrolling your phone and eating your cereal you see something out of the corner of your eye.

You lift your head from your phone to see the cat waltzing into the kitchen and jumping on the counter beside you, rubbing his head on your arm. You smile, setting your phone down next to him, your other hand holding your bowl of cereal. “Are you hungry?” You ask the cat. He looks up at you before blinking slowly and you take that as your yes.

You hop off the counter, setting your now empty bowl on the counter before getting a plate out of the cabinet. You walk to the fridge and get some chicken out, putting it on the plate before putting it in the microwave.

You take the chicken out when the microwave goes off, double checking to make sure it isn’t too hot before you put the plate in front of the cat. He looks at you and blinks before eating the chicken. You frown as you watch him eat.

‘What should you name him?’ You think.

The cat seems to feel your eyes on him as he looks up at you, licking his chops as he stares at you. The cat cocks his head ever so slightly to the side as he stares at you. You give him a smile, “Just thinking of a name for you, buddy.” You say, as if he could tell you’re upset.

The cat stares at you for another second before he goes back to eating. You reach out and give his head a pat before grabbing your bowl and putting it into the sink then making your way to the living room.

You’re in the living room for hardly a minute when the cat comes prancing in, looking around a few times before he spots you and hops up onto the couch beside you. He crawls into your lap immediately, laying his head on your thigh as his chest starts rumbling with purrs. You smile, reaching down to stroke his fur.

“I need to get you a bath, sweet thing.” The cat's head shoots up at your words, watching you with wide eyes making you laugh. “I don’t know how to take that.” You say with a smile. The cat huffs as his ears pull back before he lays his head back on your thigh, his purrs no longer rumbling in his chest.

You giggle, scratching behind his ears, “I take it you don’t like baths?” You say with a small smile, continuing to stroke his fur. The cat does something eerily akin to a head shake, along with his signature huff. You frown as you scratch behind his ears, earning purrs from the cat in return.

‘What if he’s a hybrid?’

You scoff lightly at the thought. It could be a possibility though, plus his actions are weirdly akin to human actions. You frown slightly as you mull over every action the cat has done in the past few hours since you’d found him.

The cat butts against your arm, and it’s then you realize you’d stopped petting him. You give the cat a small, apologetic smile before you continue to stroke his fur. As you watch some random show that was playing on the tv, you can’t help but wonder if the cat is really a hybrid. It wouldn’t bother you if he was, really, it'd be like having a roommate.

You brush it off for now, relaxing further into the couch as you focus on the tv.

—

You’re unsure how much time has passed, but you know it’s been enough time since you’ve last eaten for you to gather up an appetite again. You look down at the cat in your lap to see him dead asleep, asleep to the point of twitching bringing a smile to your face.

You ease your hands under his body slowly, gently lifting him up and setting him on the couch beside you. You groan as you stretch out your limbs, enjoying the satisfyingly small pops that echo in the room. You get up, making your way to your kitchen.

You open the pantry, scanning its contents and finding nothing to sooth your craving making you move onto the fridge. You pout when nothing catches your eye, closing the fridge and leaning against the counter, mentally listing what food items you may be craving.

You decide on going out and getting Chipotle, heading back to the living room for your keys and shoes. You peek back at the cat to see him still passed out, smiling softly at the sight before opening the door and walking out of your house.

—

When you’re on your way back home, you stop at the pet store you had seen on your way over, figuring you might as well get a few things for your new furry friend. When you walk into the store, you make your way to the cat section.

You look closely at the food brands, making sure you won’t be putting anything bad into the cats system.

You eventually decide on just getting a few cans of tuna and chicken, setting them into the basket hanging off of your arm. You wander further down the aisle, doing one last scan over everything to make sure there’s nothing else you’d need before making your way to the next one over.

The first thing you see are cat toys and catnip, looking over the wide variety of the different toys on display. You grab a bottle of catnip, a small one for now, and a few small toys that will hopefully entertain the cat. The rest of the aisle is mostly cat beds, a few cat towers on the end, none of them very eye-catching, however.

The next aisle holds the rest of the cat towers, and you look over them to see if any would be fun enough for the kitty at home. One catches your eye, it seems decently tall, with a few boxes that the cat would be able to hide in, two perches and a scratching post built into one of the two ramps. You pull the box off the shelf, huffing at the weight.

“Would you like help with that, Miss?” You look up at the voice, seeing a man looking at you with a small smile. You smile gratefully at him, “Yes, please.” The man nods before advancing, lifting up the box like it’s nothing.

“If you’re ready to check out, I can help you out with that, if not I can set this at the front for now.” You nod, “I’m ready to go, yea.” The man nods before leading you to where the checkouts are.

—

You sigh in relief when you set the cat tree down by the door, locking it behind you before pushing the cat tree further into the living room. You look up when you hear claws practically rushing your way, seeing the cat tearing down the stairs and straight toward you.

“Well hi, Kitty.” You say with a smile, bending over to pet him when he got close enough. The cat looks up at you before standing up on his hind legs, resting his front paws on your thighs as loud purrs begin to rumble through his body.

Your smile widens before you sit on the floor fully, scratching behind the cat's ears as he crawls into your lap. “I got you some things.” You say, gesturing to the bag and the cat tower. The cat looks at both items before back up at you, his paws kneading into your legs.

You give him one last pet before gently patting his middle, “I’m hungry, buddy, let’s go eat.” The cat huffs before rubbing against your arm, slumping against you more. “We can cuddle after we eat, buddy, I promise.” The cat huffs again, lifting his head up and staring at you for a moment before getting off of you.

You groan as you stand up, grabbing your bag of food and the bag of things you got from the pet store before making your way to the kitchen. You put the bags on the counter, rifling through the pet store bag and pulling out two cans. You look down at the cat rubbing against your shins before back up at the cans, deciding to go with the hopefully better option, tuna.

You open the can, grabbing a plate and emptying the cans contents on the plate. You grab the plate, looking down as you step back, making sure you don’t either accidentally step on him, or kick him. The cat looks up at you when you step away, following after you as you move to the living room.

You set the plate on the floor beside the couch, heading back to the kitchen to grab your food, taking it back to the living room with you. The cat isn’t anywhere in the living room, confusing you.

You set down your food on the coffee table, turning around, about to go looking for the cat when a meow by your feet stops you. You look down, seeing the cat looking up at you before rubbing against your legs when he grabs your attention.

“Eat buddy, you haven’t eaten for a few hours.” You say, sitting down on the couch before reaching over and gently scratching his head. The cat looks from you to the tuna before back at you, jumping onto the couch and trying to sit on your lap.

You gently push him away, bending over to grab the tuna, setting it on the couch with you. “If you eat we can cuddle, okay?” You mentally laugh at yourself for talking to a cat. The cat huffs before turning to the tuna, as do you turn to your food, taking it out of the bag and opening it.

You’re only about halfway through your food, your attention stuck on a show playing on the tv when you feel something soft against your arm. You turn your head to see the cat staring at you expectantly, bring a small smile to your face as you lift your arm up, giving him access to your lap.

The cat immediately climbs into your lap, laying down and getting comfortable before loud purrs are spilling out of his chest freely. Your smile widens, reaching down to gently stroke his fur with one hand while the other sets your food on the coffee table. The cat turns onto his side, then to his back, stretching out his limbs, staying in the stretching position.

You giggle, gently scratching his stomach, earning, if possible, louder purrs from the cat. You turn your attention back to the tv, relaxing into the couch with a content sigh. You groan when you hear your phone ringing, looking down at your phone beside you. You bite back another groan at the caller ID. Your boss.

You pick up your phone, answering the call before bringing your phone to your ear, “Hello?” You mumble into the phone. Your eyes widen as you start moving the cat off of you, “Yes, yes I’ll be there soon.” The cat huffs as he’s set onto the couch beside you, watching you intently as you stand up before practically rushing upstairs.

When you get back downstairs, this time changed from your pj’s to actual clothes, the cat is off the couch and walking toward you. “I’ll be back buddy, I promise. I just gotta go into work for a little, okay?” The cat stares at you before walking the last few steps between the two of you, rubbing against your shins making you smile.

You reach down to give the cat's head a few soft pats before making your way to your front door, grabbing your keys, then exiting the house.

—

By the time you make it to the facility, Mr. Dubose is outside, rushing to you as you get out of your car. “Thank you so much for coming in, Y/n. These two hybrids showed up a few hours ago but no one has been able to get them to calm down, one looks to be injured, and the other won’t let anyone near the two of them.” You nod at the information, following Mr. Dubose inside and to the room the hybrids are in.

“We managed to get them inside, but they wouldn’t go in without a fight.” You nod, taking a deep breath before pushing the door open. The faint metallic scent of blood is the first thing you notice, the next are the two hybrids huddled in one of the corners, one covering the other with his body. The latter turns to look at you as soon as you enter, squeezing the hybrid further behind him as you fully step into the room.

You crouch down before sitting back on your heels, gently closing the door behind you, your focus solely on the hybrids. “Hi..my name’s Y/n..we just wa-” You’re interrupted by the hybrid launching himself at you, wrapping his arms tightly around your waist and burying his face in your neck. You freeze, hands hovering just above the hybrid's body as he sobs into your neck. You turn to look at the hybrid that was previously covered only to see him watching you intently, his eyes glossy as he tries to crawl forward.

“W-we thought we’d n-never fi-find you again..” The hybrid plastered against you whispers, circling his arms tighter around you. “I…I’m sorry what?” You ask, your attention focused on the hybrid crawling toward you. “Don’t-dont you remember u-us?” The hybrid crawling towards you asks, finally beside your body.

“I’m sorry..I can’t say I do.” You say with a frown, trying to figure out where you might’ve seen the two hybrids before. “Y-Your dad a-adopted us wh-when we were ki-kids?” Your eyes widen as you immediately wrap an arm around Hoseok, wrapping the other around Jungkook and pulling him close. “Oh my god..I thought I’d never find you guys again oh my god.” You whisper, tears clouding your vision as you pinch your eyes shut, leaning your head onto Hoseoks.

Jungkook plasters himself against you as best as he can, sticking his head into your neck. “God I missed you both so fucking much.” You whisper, pursing your lips to hold back a sob. “We missed you t-too.” Jungkook whispers, wrapping his arms around your middle over Hoseoks.

A knock at the door startles both of the hybrids in your arms, their bodies stiffening as Hoseok subconsciously begins slowly moving the three of you to the wall opposite of the door. “Come in.” You call out softly, squeezing the hybrids tighter to you. Mr. Dubose enters, surprise evident on his features when he sees you on the floor cuddling the hybrids who had refused to even get near anyone. “I see you’ve calmed them down.” Mr. Dubose says with a small smile, only peeking his head in.

“They’re childhood friends of mine.” You say, lifting your head up to look at Mr. Dubose. He nods, eyes flitting between the three of you. “Can you look them over? Make sure they don’t have any injuries or that they at least aren’t bad?” You nod, knowing neither of them will probably want someone near them at the moment with how they were acting earlier.

Mr. Dubose gives you a short nod before his head disappears and the door closes behind him. Hoseok and Jungkook visibly relax, now practically limp in your arms. You give the two one last squeeze before trying to pull them back from your body. Hoseok fights you with a whine, pushing closer while Jungkook sits back on his heels, watching you with tear stained cheeks making you frown.

You reach a hand out, wiping the wet streaks from Jungkook’s face as Hoseok gives you one last squeeze before parting from you, his own cheeks tear stained just like yours and Jungkook’s. “Are any of you injured?” You ask, gently taking Hoseok's face in your hand as you look him over, roaming your gaze over his body, looking for any blood stains or tears in his clothing. Just as you finish your quick scan, Hoseok shakes his head, turning to look at Jungkook, “Kook is though..” He says quietly.

You immediately pull Jungkook closer to you, quickly overlooking his body, seeing small nicks and scratches littered across what you can see of his arms and legs. You start to feel over his body, freezing when he lets out a whimper as you touch his elbow. You look up at his face to see it scrunched in displeasure, cradling his arm close to his chest. You frown, gently pushing up the sleeve of his shirt, looking at his elbow.

You frown at the slightly swollen limb, the area a shade of pink. “What…what happened to you guys?” You ask, almost afraid of the answer as you shift your gaze between the two hybrids. “We uh..we ran away from our o-old home..I got caught in a rose bush..” You frown at Jungkook's words. “And your arm?” You ask, watching Jungkook’s face closely. “He uhm..I wasn’t be-behaving..” your frown deepens as you gently pull Jungkook into your side, wrapping your arms around his shoulders.

“I’m so sorry..” You whisper, gently rocking you and Jungkook back and forth. Jungkook shakes his head against your shoulder, “Was worth it..we found you again.” You sigh, reaching up to tangle your finger in Jungkook’s hair earning a small shudder from him as he goes lax in your hold. You reach down to your belt, picking up your walkie and radioing Mr. Dubose, asking for medical assistance.

You see Hoseok stiffen out of the corner of your eye, giving him a reassuring smile as you put your walkie back down. “Don’t worry. Everyone here is extremely nice and just want to help you guys.” You say, reaching out to gently grasp Hoseok's hand in yours, giving it a small squeeze. Hoseok nods, pulling your hand into his lap and playing with your fingers.

Jungkook whines, nuzzling against your neck making you laugh, continuing to run your fingers through his hair. “Are you gonna take us home?” Hoseok asks, slotting his fingers between your own, looking up at you with nothing but hope in his eyes. “I’m gonna make damn sure I do.” You say, earning a smile from Hoseok and a small laugh from Jungkook. “I’m not sure if I’ll be able to take you with me today, though.” You say with a frown, “Dr. Martin will probably want to keep tabs on Kookie for a bit before he leaves.” Hoseok frowns, eyes flitting between you and Jungkook.

“I know you won’t want to leave him. I don’t either. I can see if I can stay a few nights here with you g—shit! I can't.” You groan, laying your head on Jungkook’s with a pout. “What if…what if we stayed at your house and he checked up on us there?” You look at Hoseok, seeing a matching pout playing on his lips as he stares at you. “Maybe…I’m sure I could figure something out.” You say, jumping slightly when the doors open.

You feel Jungkook stiffen in your arms, and see Hoseok stiffen as he drags you and Jungkook close to him. “Y/n? You said you needed medical assistance?” Dr. Martin says, gaze shifting between you and the two hybrids. “Yeah, Jungkook has something going on with his arm, I’m not sure if he broke it or not.” You say, attempting to pull said hybrid from your body. He fights you with a small whine, keeping his body smushed against yours. “I take it you’re close..?” Dr. Martin asks, unsure. You nod, giving him an apologetic smile, “Yeah, my dad adopted these two when I was young.” Dr. Martin nods, sitting down a few steps away from you.

“Can I take a look at your arm, Jungkook?” Dr. Martin asks, gaze shifting between Hoseok and Jungkook. You manage to get Jungkook’s injured arm away from your body, yet his body seems as if it’s super glued to you. “I can work with this, Y/n. Don’t worry.” Dr. Martin gives you a small smile before inching forward.

Hoseok inches back, hand still tightly grasped onto yours, taking you with him for a moment. You turn to Hoseok, giving him another reassuring smile as you squeeze his hand gently. He freezes, eyes locking with yours before he sighs, bending forward until his head rests on your thigh, his unoccupied hand coming up to wrap around your leg. You feel a small jolt from Jungkook, accompanied by a small whimper making you turn your head to Dr. Martin. “Sorry.” He apologizes, giving both you and Jungkook (the side of his head) an apologetic smile.

You jump when Jungkook lets out a small yelp, jumping in your arms. You fight the urge to send Dr. Martin a glare, instead giving him a sideways glance as he sighs. “I can’t really tell, but I think it’s broken.” You frown at his words, pressing your cheek against Jungkook’s hair, running your fingers through the hair at the nape of his neck. “We’re gonna have to get him an x-ray, but, thankfully we have a machine here.” You nod, gently rocking Jungkook as Dr. Martin backs away and gets up.

“Bun? You’re gonna have to move. We gotta follow Dr. Martin to get your x-ray. We need to know if your arm is broken or not.” Jungkook whines, shaking his head against your neck. “I know, I’m sorry Kook. But I’ll be here, okay?” You look up at Dr. Martin for confirmation, receiving a nod in response. Jungkook still takes a minute, taking a few deep breaths before finally parting from you, his eyes glossy and nose red sending a pang to your heart.

You stand up before helping Jungkook and Hoseok up, offering your hand to Jungkook. He takes it immediately, pulling himself as close to your body as he can. You look up at Dr. Martin, giving him a small nod to which he reciprocates before opening the door and walking out, you, Jungkook and Hoseok following close behind.

“Y/n! You’re back!” You pause, looking behind you to see Jimin coming toward you, Taehyung behind him, a wide smile on the former’s face. “Hi, Jimin. How are you and Taehyung doing?” Jimin and Taehyung finally catch up, walking beside Jungkook. You don’t miss how Jimin gives an unsure glance at the two hybrids beside you, “Ah, we’re good. I’ve missed you.” You smile, “it’s only been a day.” Jimin shrugs.

“Alright, I’m gonna have to take Jungkook in alone.” Dr. Martin says, stopping at a door. You feel Jungkook freeze, his body clinging further to you. “Do I..do I have to go in alone?” You frown at Jungkook’s voice, letting go of Hoseok's hand to place yours on Jungkook’s cheek, gently tilting his head up from your shoulder. “You’ll be okay, yeah? We’ll be right out here.” Jungkook nods, albeit still hesitant as he slowly lets go of you, walking into the room with Dr. Martin.

You let your eyes linger on the door before turning to the three hybrids. “Jimin, Taehyung, this is Hoseok, Hobi this is Taehyung and Jimin.” Jimin looks at Hoseok, giving him a smile, Taehyung doing the same. “This is one of my two best friends I told you about.” Confusion crosses Jimin’s face for a moment before his eyes widen, Taehyung still looking confusedly between you, Jimin and Hoseok. “Ah, sorry, I never told you, my dad adopted two hybrids for me when I was young, Hoseok being one of them,” You say, gesturing to Hoseok. “They were taken by hc when I was young.” Taehyung lets out a small ‘ah’ as he nods.

“Who exactly…are Jimin and Taehyung to you?” Hoseok asks hesitantly, gaze flickering between you, Taehyung and Jimin. “They’re one of the main hybrids I care for.” You say with a smile. You jump when the door behind you swings open, whipping around to see Jungkook rushing out of the room and straight to you. “Kook wha-” You wrap your arms around him as soon as he crashes into you. You freeze when a sob escapes his lips. “I-I hated it in-in there.”

You feel another pair of arms wrap around yours and Jungkook’s body, looking up to see Hoseok looking at Jungkook worriedly. You look up to see Dr. Martin coming out of the room, a small frown playing on his lips as he sees the shaking hybrid in your arms. “He got a little spooked by the x-ray machine..” Dr. Martin says with a sigh. “His arm doesn’t look broken, it seems like it might just be a mild sprain.” You let out a relieved sigh. Maybe they’ll be able to stay at your house after all..

Last - Next - Masterlist

A/n: again very sorry about any typos or parts that don’t make sense, I’ll try and proofread soon!

[awakefor48hours]

*Redoing this poll because I made typo and want to add some clarification.

Out these five, you can only save one, the others are deleted 100% from existence.

Keep in mind what this question entails. Think about what "100% deleted from existence" means. Every last bit of the others' existence (movies/shows/concepts) has been completely wiped away from human existence forever. Think deeper than "without Shrek, we're just losing 'what are you doing in my swamp' from meme culture."

Shrek was able to stop Disney's monopoly on animated movies. If that never happened, would the Spiderverse movies be made by Disney? If so, then would they be as good as they currently are? Would the Spiderverse movies even be made? By sacrificing Shrek, who knows?

Without the High School Musical movies, does Zach Efron have the same career and if not then what does that look like? If it does change, how does the theater community change?

Kung-Fu Panda was such a success in China that there's now a Kung-Fu Panda theme park in China.

Just think more before you vote. Let your sci-fi fantasy brain have a turn at the wheel.

Also, please consider reblogging for a larger sample size

[dustbunnylair]

Kirara Confirmed Male?

As I have spoken about multiple times previously, Kirara is one of the androgynous characters in Jujutsu Kaisen. However, recently on the (fanmade) wiki, their gender has gone from "unknown" to "male". However, I have doubts about it.

To be honest, I don't completely understand how the wiki went from unknown to male. Yes, the students from Jujutsu High, Panda, and Megumi, remember Kirara as masculine-presenting, referring to them as a boy. However, despite that, Gege and almost all of the characters use they/them pronouns on Kirara.

Kinji Hakari, a now-suspended student from Jujutsu High (just like Kirara) is shown to have a fierce, loyal, companionship with Kirara. I believe the wiki originally described their relationship as "intimate" but I think that has been changed now. Kirara is protective of Hakari, and most people have assumed they are a non-confirmed couple. Because of the below image.

With that being said, hypothetically let's say they are a non-confirmed couple, or friends with benefits, whatever you want to label it. Hakari has straight up said he does not like men, he's into women, and has had previous relationships with women. I used this proof in a previous post, but I'll show it again for those who didn't see that post.

But again as I've said in the previous post, I'm not 100% that the above image is not a mistranslation so I'll show the image that I found which is of this panel:

Also not to be a dick about grammar or typos on a wiki, more so just trying to call it out since they mostly refer to Kirara as they/them on the wiki for consistency, but the wiki seems to have a few errors of calling Kirara by she/her at times. This just makes me even more confused about whether Kirara is still androgynous or is a male or a woman or whatever the hell.

As much as I would like to provide proof of screenshots of each error, I have trouble reading long amounts of paragraphs so I apologize for not providing screenshots. However, you can find the wiki here. Again, not trying to be a dick about typos, I could be completely incorrect and misreading the sentences.

I'm not too mad at the fact that Kirara might be a guy. What concerns me more is that people will label Kirara as a "trap". I usually do feel disappointed by "trap" characters, I don't really like cross-dressing characters being used for comedic effect or for people to point and laugh at.

I honestly would've preferred Kirara's gender to remain unknown or be confirmed a woman just so they aren't a laughing stock. There are only two androgynous characters in Jujutsu Kaisen (from what I remember), Uraume and Kirara. Usually, people who say Kirara is a femboy are most likely to say Uraume is a girl, or vice versa.

To be honest I think I'll still refer to Kirara as they/them instead of saying they're a guy, unless Gege says otherwise of course.

[sentient-rift]

Mr. Tinker was a little embarrassed by that slip of the tongue. How did he make that mistake?

"Right. Carol Tea. My mistake..."

A certain hedgehog android was almost as embarrassed as his creator.

Really, father...? He thought.

Upon being spoken to by the panda woman he was all too familiar with, Torque spoke up nervously.

"Y-yes. That's me. I'm Torque the Shellduck... Heh heh heh..."

He couldn't help but remember being imprisoned by the panda woman. That bad memory just led to a few more bad memories... But Torque shook them off. This was a time to celebrate Carol, not dwell on the past.

"A-anyway, everybody introduce yourselves to the nice lady!"

Despite how awkward Torque made things, everyone did as the Shellduck said.

"My name is Terios. I'm a friend of Carol's. She's the coolest wildcat ever."

"I'm Mr. Tinker. You can think of me as Terios' father figure. It's a pleasure."

"I'm Kat. I'm your friendly neighborhood Gravity Queen. Nice to meet you."

"And I am Sorrow. I look forward to celebrating this momentous occasion."

After the introductions, Torque spoke up again.

"S-so, then... Do we have permission to come in?"

@formerchaoslord

Coral? Was this man looking for life in prison, associating with that name? Or did he simply misspeak?

She would assume the latter, mostly because it would be quite ridiculous for a certain mercenary to go back to her old ways, on the night that would be so important to her sister.

She bowed.

"Yes, you are at the right place for Carol Tea's wedding. I assume you are--

". . .

"Are you that shellduck man?"

[raincode-archives]

Chapter 0 Loading Screen Trivia

Note: Currently, I do not know which of these trivia may be general game trivia or Chapter 0 exclusives (if there is any). And there may be trivia I'm currently missing that I will add later on, if I find any more.

World Detective Organization (WDO) An extra-legal, extra-privileged organization devoted to eradicating the world's unsolved mysteries.

WDO Examination Alongside an interview, the WDO assigns a once unsolved mystery they've solved as a test, Those who do not meet the standards for character and ability are not accepted into the organization.

Detective Deed An identification card. These are granted by the World Detective Organization.

Master Detective Among the detectives belonging to the World Detective Organization, this is a detective with a specialized power called Forensic Forte that aids in their investigative activities.

Forensic Forte Those exhibiting innate talent for special powers like clairvoyance or mind-reading are trained by the WDO to develop a supernatural investigative ability called Forensic Forte or simply, Forte.

Amaterasu Corporation Many products are in development, some of which cannot be made public.

Amaterasu Peacekeepers A department of Amaterasu Corporation. They serve as a sort of police force within Kanai Ward.

Special Autonomous Zone of Kanai Ward Though initially a regional city, all of Kanai Ward fell under the control of Amaterasu Corporation as the company developed it.

Amaterasu Express A fully automated, unmanned train developed by Amaterasu Corporation. It boasts excellent amenties and a smooth ride. Kanai Ward is not a typical destination. (No, I didn't make a typo)

Amaterasu Express Direct Built with Amaterasu Corporation's cutting-edge technology, this five-car train operates fully autonomously, without a driver or any crew on board.

Gem of the Dining Car Among the liquors lining the bar is a bottle of vintage whisky, though its exorbitant price has left it untouched.

Door Security Each passenger room on the Amaterasu Express features a door that notifies a security company when an designated key is inserted into the keyhole. Consequently, crimes on the train are rare.

Restroom Urban Legend There is an urban legend about a locked door in the restroom on the express train. Knock on the door in a specific rhythm and a phantom in a black cape will appear to kill any person one desires.

Zange's Cane Used to assist with walking, but doubles as a weapon in emergencies, felling opponents with cane fighting techniques.

Pucci's Coat A treasured small panda appliqué is adorned to a shoulder of Pucci's coat.

Aphex's Boots The boots Aphex wears are fitted with metal plates in many places, like safety shoes.

Melami's Ambition Truth is, she's not a fan of the WDO uniforms and plans to submit a new design proposal in hopes of creating a "Design by Melami" line of uniforms.

Zilch's Belongings Most of his belongings are made of fur, and he always carries a brush and oil for upkeep.

Swank's Grill Swank wears a silver grill engraved with the word "MONEY" on his upper incisors. A grill made of gold is an order.

[phoenixyfriend]

Masterlist: Polls (non-Star Wars)

Navigation Post

Fun fact, tumblr allows 250 links on the old editor and 100 in the new. So. Network of masterlists.

Make a Choice!

Your favorite character is a mad scientist of the engineering subspecies. As a child, teenager, or sleep-deprived young adult, what random appliance have they taken apart and possibly set on fire in the course of trying to "improve it?" New and unanticipated sentience for the appliance optional.

Anti-plagiarism check! Pick your favorite citation format.

You can only pick one: Jokes about how white people don't know how to spice or season food. Jokes about how white people shotgun cinnamon the second September hits.

Is it vaguely dystopian for large elementary and secondary schools to have numbers instead of/before names? (e.g. the students of PS 91Q only know it by that code, not Richard Arkwright)

How long does a daily commute ROUND TRIP need to be to qualify as 'long'?

It is easier to change... your appearance OR your personality

When you see DSM-V, how do you pronounce it.

microwaving water for tea

Everyone Pick The Same Number

Writing and fandom polls!

Posting WIPs or unfinished works?

Best non-standard narrative format (that I've personally used)?

How well do you know omegaverse?

What does "it reads like bad fanfiction" mean to you, WHEN YOU SEE IT IN THE WILD, assuming no context?

What do you mean when YOU say "it reads like bad fanfiction," assuming no other context? (Unfortunately, typo messed it up)

Have you ever posted something Anonymously on AO3? (Not counting temporary anonymity for events.)

Tell me about your culture (and opinions on such)!

Did your school have you do a Mole project where, while learning what an atomic mole was, you took home a pattern and made a stuffed mole (animal)?

How close is your nearest grocery store? (Or farmer's market, fruit stand, butcher, etc. Food shop that is not a restaurant.)

Did you have to stand and recite a Pledge of Allegiance type thing to your country of residence in elementary school (and possibly beyond)

Taking off shoes on an airplane

Favorite elementary/middle school "everyone just learned a new body part" phrase

Did you know that bagels are a whole Thing and just as important to the New Yorker identity as pizza, if not more so?

Is "Whistling will bring mice into the house" a thing for you guys?

Do schools in your area do active shooter drills?

Does your culture/region have 'ants on a log' as a snack? (contains peanut butter brand discourse)

Do you do egg battles?

Tell me about yourself!

Think of your favorite band! Make sure it it is a band and not a solo artist. Now tell me the gender breakdown.

If you're trans, what's your preferred way to finish this sentence?

Pronounce "Sixth"

When you see the letter J in an unfamiliar word that you don't know the origin of, how do you pronounce it? (Assume you are reading a text in English.)

How important is the eco-friendliness fabric content to you when buying clothes?

What is your least favorite kind of makeup to put on?

Did you ever go to a big box store with your parents, get bored, and decide to take your blood pressure at the kiosk while you waited for them to finish?

A question for the pals who grew up bilingual: Have you ever had to translate from 'the language of the home country' to 'the language of where we live now' for your immigrant parents?

Last app you downloaded?

Can you reliably identify the various national blue/red/white tricolor stripe flags? (e.g. France, Russia, Netherlands, Serbia, and so on.)

Which of my "childish for someone over 21" traits are you?

Which syllable do you stress when saying Zagreb?

Do you ever heat up your milk* for cereal? - In defense of Panda Puffs

First grey hairs?

Ladies, where do you buy (most of) your undies?

How tempted are you pronounce processes (the plural of process, not the verb) as "PRO-seh-SEES" when you write it out?

Which New Doctor Who companion First Meeting™ career are you?

What are you willingly sacrificing DESPITE it being important* to you the next time you go to the hair salon/fuck it up in the bathroom?

What's your comfort/background noise show that you can rewatch indefinitely to turn off your brain a bit?

How often do you wash your bra?

How often do you change/wash your sheets?

Oh shit, the peanut butter you just opened is separated, and you need to mix the oil back in with the rest. How?

Mayonnaise

Nonsense!

let's make a bell curve!

But I am le tired... 🚬

I use an Android because

Blood on ya undies (funny phrasing)

If you're NEW to tumblr (like joined in the last two or three years), are you seeking out guides on how to engage with tumblr?

Without context, FTW stands for

Rocky Mountain Oysters

Is pilaf/pilav* a casserole?

Tag meme, not a poll: Who’s your fake late spouse?

[thoroughlymodernminutia]

This Christmas

Pairing: Benny "Borracho" Magalon x Reader

Word Count: 4,755

Summary: Benny tries to create a Christmas Eve for you during a hard time in your life.

Warnings: Kind of fluffy, but talk of grief, guilt, parental loss. Some foul language. If I missed anything else let me know and I'll add it in.

A/N: This is the first fic I've finished in over 20+ years so...it's probably mediocre at best. A lot has changed in how fics were written in late 90s and I'm still trying to grasp that. Fair warning: I am not a good writer unless it's an email. Apologies in advance if my inability to understand sentence structure is obvious and if there are any typos.

I love stupid lifetime and hallmark Christmas movies, so there are probably hints of that in this. I chose Benny because he had like 4 lines in Den of Thieves and he seemed easy to work with. The story has some personal meaning to me, so if you hate it just keep it to yourself lol

I also want to give a shout out to @mariamariquinha @the-hinky-panda @cheesybadgers @mysoulisasunflower and @bullet-prooflove for the encouragement and kind words when I posted about my hesitation in sharing this.

----------------------

The guys are sitting in their chairs, staring at Benny like he has three heads. He’d just spent the last 20 minutes explaining why he needs their help in a few days; on Christmas Eve. He wouldn’t be embarrassing himself like some love struck fool if he had any other choice.

“This is sick, Borracho. Really sick.” Zapata shakes his head as he breaks the silence.

“Didn’t realize you were so fucking romantic.” Henderson joins in.

Big Nick slaps his hand on Benny’s back as he passes him to go back to his office, “Count me out, shithead.” 

Benny groans and hangs head. He really should have just figured out a way to do this himself. Now he’ll never hear the end of it from these miserable fucks. And calling him a “romantic;" these idiots wouldn’t know romance if it punched them in their faces. It’s not even like he’s that romantic. They’re acting like it’s a crime to be thoughtful. 

He can’t help it if being a good detective makes him more attentive, more considerate in relationships. He’s always finding himself filing away little things that you mention–or don’t mention. He has a collection of these in his mind, some even from before you started dating. And now he wants to use all these bits and pieces of information to try to create the perfect Christmas Eve for you. Christmas Eve because he knows you love it more than the actual day itself. But the guys' blank stares and biting little remarks are not inspiring confidence. Benny runs his hands over his face and rolls his chair closer to the desk.

“Forget I said anything.”

“Look at this sad, sack of shit.” Connors is laughing and throws a paper clip at Benny. “You’re going to owe us big time, you know that right?”

Benny breathes a sigh of relief. The guys are definitely going to haunt him with this for as long as he lives, but it will be worth it.

“I know.”

—-

This is Benny’s first real Christmas with you. Although he secretly counts the morning of the previous Christmas Eve when he stopped by your donut shop Glazy For You. He wasn’t working and had no reason to be in the neighborhood. But he wanted to see you without all the other guys there. If they were all there, he wouldn’t have been able to work up the nerve to ask you out. They’d harass both of you to no end. When he stood in front of your counter and asked, he’ll never forget how you laughed. You questioned him if it was a ploy for a group of cops to get free donuts. Then you were quiet for a moment and he almost started talking to fill the silence. But then he heard you say yeah okay and it was like he had been struck by lightning. You wrote your number down on a business card and handed it to him. Benny struggled to play it cool while he was leaving only to break down and text immediately from his car. He thought if he waited even one second longer you’d change your mind. 

The first date was the week between Christmas and the New Year. That week is like a brief interlude in your life where anything can happen. Benny remembers that he must have been on that night because you stared intently whenever he spoke. He also remembers how beautiful you looked when you were talking about your work. The way you lit up when talking about Maple Bars made him laugh. He’d never met someone so in love with one type of donut. He could swear at one point when you were talking about them he saw your eyes actually sparkle. There was a familiarity throughout the date that made Benny feel immediately comfortable. The first date turned into a second date, and then a third. At some point when he was loading the dishwasher at your house, he realized he had stopped counting.

You both tried to keep the relationship quiet whenever the guys had stopped by to cure their hangovers with donuts and coffee. He knows how obnoxious they can be and he didn’t want them ruining anything. Ultimately, Benny ruins it for himself when he breaks the cardinal rule of never smiling while texting. When Connors had grabbed his phone and started showing how he has your contact name as Maple Bar—he knew there was no chance of keeping you to himself anymore.

Benny was right, of course. The next time they went, they practically dragged him in while shouting “Maple Bar” at you. You laughed as your face turned red, trying to play it off, but the secret was out. After the novelty of the relationship wore off for the guys, they started calling you “Benny’s girl”. Whenever he heard, he felt like the pit of his stomach was going to drop out. Things between you and the guys stayed largely the same—you joked around with them before and you joke around with them now. The only thing that’s different is Benny feels protective of you even though he knows you’re fine. That was another thing he filed away—that you were the first woman to actually appreciate his bond with the guys. You know they have his back and that’s what’s important to you. It’s just one of the reasons Benny’s love for you grows.

—-

Near the end of the summer your dad passed away suddenly. Benny was at work, but when he got your text, he called you asking where you were. He knew your family dynamics were difficult and he didn’t want you to be alone. He thinks maybe a different sort of man would have been scared by the rawness of the situation. That it would have been too much, too soon. But Benny doesn’t scare easily, so he sat with you on the floor, in the kitchen of your closed shop. He kept you close to him while you cried and listened as you told him how you felt stupid for crying because your relationship with your dad wasn’t the best. His chest tightened when you told him you felt like you didn’t deserve to feel sad. That sadness was reserved for a relationship that had been whole. Benny anchored you to him, afraid that if he let go, you might drift away.

Benny knows you tried to hide being sad after that. You sneak off to the bathroom to cry periodically and one time he follows you. Benny knows about stuffing feelings down—it’s part of his job—but he doesn’t want you doing the same. He gets you talking, you tell him you have this guilt for not attending the funeral. You couldn’t bring yourself to be in a room with his wife of only a few years making everything about herself. Especially after she wouldn’t let you come to their house to look through his things. He didn’t judge you for making that decision; he knows what it’s like to have to make choices not knowing if you are making the right one. Still, Benny’s heart would break when you would  refer to yourself as a horrible person, a horrible daughter. He knows he wasn’t a witness to many things in your life, but he also knows you’re not a bad person. He’s seen how you always step up to help people—giving your money or your time. You even kept Connors fed while he was on leave due to an injury. You give to others what you seem unable to give to yourself and it makes Benny’s heart ache

You seem okay until Thanksgiving with his parents. It was your first time meeting his family and in Benny’s eyes, it was a success. His parents loved you right away. His mom loved the extra help in the kitchen. His sister delighted in telling you the secrets of his childhood. His dad was impressed you owned your own business. But as you both sat in the car outside the house you broke down crying. You kept apologizing while telling him how wonderful his family is; how being around them reminded you that you’d never have another holiday with your dad. You explained how Christmas was his favorite holiday. That he would spend hours stringing up lights around the house before making spritz cookies with you. You took some shallow breaths trying to calm yourself down before listing all the Christmas Eve traditions your family had. That those memories somehow always eclipse the shittier parts of your childhood. Benny held your hand while you spoke. He knows what it’s like to lose people, in his line of work it’s inevitable. But he doesn’t know what it’s like to lose a parent so he stays quiet. When Benny feels you squeeze his hand it sparks something in him. He suddenly becomes very determined to make this Christmas Eve perfect for you.

—-

When December 24th finally arrives, Benny feels as excited as he did when he was a kid. He knew you would be working which gives him time to decorate your house. The only person that backs out from helping is Big Nick—but he never actually agreed so Benny can’t really hold it against him. He puts Connors and Henderson on Christmas lights duty. Benny takes the inside, he knows the guys well enough to not trust them to go through your things. 

Benny finds all of your Christmas decorations and another string of lights in the hallways closet. When he’s grabbing a box labeled ornaments off the shelf a box, wrapped in silver and red striped paper falls to the floor. When he picks it up to place it back on the shelf he catches a glimpse of the white tag on it—To: Benny. He can’t help but smile when he closes the door. 

While he is untangling the lights, Zapata comes in with a tree. Benny looks at it and laughs. It’s so sparse and wide he can see through it. 

“It’s the only one they had.” He shrugs as he props it up against the wall. 

Benny touches one of the branches. “It is a tree, so I guess you did what I asked.”

Zapata shakes his head. “Man, this is a crazy, fucking thing you’re doing.” 

Benny smiles to himself thinking that love will make you do crazy, fucking things.

“I know.”

Zapata leaves and he can hear him shouting up to Connors and Henderson on the roof. Benny can hear them talking about him using their standard terms of endearment: dickless, crazy asshole, and idiot. Benny doesn’t care, because Benny has you. 

It only takes a handful of hours for the guys to put the lights up outside and for Benny to finish decorating inside. The tree doesn’t look as bad once he wraps some lights around it and puts your ornaments up. He’s charmed by the fact you kept all these ornaments from when you were a kid–one for every year until you turned 18. He got some frosted glass spray and tries his best to make your windows look wintery. Finally, Benny wraps your gift in some plaid wrapping paper he found. He surprises himself by the fact that it doesn’t look like complete garbage.

—-

Your car is conveniently having its brakes repaired so Benny told you he would pick you up once you closed for the evening. You’d come back to his place for dinner and a movie and then call it a night. But Benny is sending Connors to pick you up instead. Benny is going to need the extra time to do something he hasn’t done since he was a kid—make cookies.

There’s a reason why Benny hasn’t made cookies in decades. He’s lost when it comes to anything more than standard kitchen fare. Spaghetti, grilling, he can do that just fine. But baking might as well be nuclear science. He’s grateful your kitchen is 90% baking supplies, it saves him from having to fumble around a store looking for all of it.

You have so many recipe books he doesn’t know where to begin. He tries looking through them, but gives up and resorts to googling one on his phone. He thinks maybe it’s cheating to look up the recipe online, but how many variants of this could there be? Somewhere between the 1st and 10th recipe he looks at he finally notices the jump to recipe feature; saving him from the life stories of food bloggers. He settles on one that has minimal backstory, thinking that means it’s an easier.

By the time Benny is done he has what seems like 10 dozen cookies and has made a mess of your entire kitchen. He doesn’t know how he used almost every single dish you have to make one kind of cookie. He tries one of them and he can’t tell if they are supposed to taste like that or if he fucked something up. For Benny, the most pathetic part of the whole thing was that he had to call his mother. A grown, adult man Face Timing his mother because he couldn’t figure out how to work a cookie press. He didn’t realize it would be more complicated than cleaning a gun. He knows he’ll never live this down.

—-

You’re waiting outside of your shop for Benny when you see Connors’ car pull up. Your stomach tightens automatically when you see him step out of the car. Your mind goes to the worst, that something’s happened to Benny.

“Hey Murph, is everything okay?” 

“Borracho got called into work. Asked me to take you home.” 

Once you know Benny is okay your mind goes to how much you hate his nickname. It’s so totally unrepresentative of the man you know.

“Oh, he should have texted. I could have just taken an Uber or something.” 

“You can pay me if it makes you feel better.” 

You laugh as you double check the lock on your security gate. 

“I know how you drive. If you get me home in one piece, then we can discuss your fee.” 

As you get in the car you can hear Connors go on and on about how excellent of a driver he is. You roll your eyes as you put your seatbelt on. 

You’re thankful for the mostly quiet car ride to your house. Connors fills you in on why Benny had to go into work. For whatever reason he seems to be laying it on a little thick—a string of toy store robberies makes it sound like he just watched Home Alone 2. At any moment you feel like he is going to mention a woman covered in pigeons. You don’t think you’ve ever said ‘uh huh’ so much in your life. 

On the drive you see so many houses lit up with Christmas lights and decorations in yards that it starts to make you sad. Sad that you didn’t even get a tree. Sad that you won’t be able to spend your first real Christmas together, together. The Christmas Eve when he asked you out probably only counts in your mind. It still feels strange—the fact that he asked you out. From the first time he came in you developed a little crush. Initially, you didn’t know he was a cop. If you had, it might have stifled your growing crush a bit. You liked that he stood out in that pack of loud voices by not being one. The first time he spoke to you, you wondered how a man with a neck tattoo could have a voice as soft as his. And he was so handsome on that first date in his dark green flannel. You loved the gray speckled in his facial hair; it gave you the impression he was a serious kind of guy, not prone to playing games.

You sigh loud enough that Connors gives you a weird look and you try to pretend like it was yawn. You look back out to the houses and think maybe being alone tonight is better. You’ve been a real fucking downer lately and why ruin a perfectly good Christmas Eve for someone else.

—-

Connors stops at the bottom of a driveway belonging to a house that’s not yours. It looks like your house—a small, one-story, dark blue house with white trim, a small porch, and a window looking out to the street. But you know your house does not have Christmas lights. And this house masquerading as yours, is all lit up.

“This is not my house.”

“Yeah it is.” Connors points and you see Benny standing on the porch, illuminated by the lights. 

“You’re such an asshole.” You blink back the tears that are on the edge of falling. 

He laughs, “Yeah, I know.” 

You thank Connors before getting out of the car. You have a feeling he did more than just give you a ride home. When you step out of his car and close the door behind you, you stand for a moment staring at your house. You don’t think you've ever seen it look so beautiful. It looks like a painting with Benny standing there looking so beautiful too in his dark green flannel buttoned all the way to the top. 

“I knew something was up when Murph was reciting the plot to Home Alone 2 as your work emergency.” 

You give a sly smile as you walk up your porch steps. You can hear Connors’ car idling until Benny waves and he drives off.

“I knew I should’ve had Henderson pick you up.” 

You kiss Benny lightly and wrap your arms around his neck. 

“If I’d known you were breaking out the formal flannel, I would have dressed up.” 

Benny laughs as he takes one of your hands in his. He looks at you in your sugar and icing stained t-shirt and jeans. You look so pretty standing there he almost says what he’s been holding in for months, but stops himself.

“You look perfect.”

Benny squeezes your hand as he brings you into the house. 

—-

You’re overwhelmed when you see everything. You see the tree decorated with your ornaments. It’s so breathtaking, better than any tree you’ve ever seen in your life. But you know that even if it was just a branch tacked to your wall you’d feel the same way. Before you can turn around to tell Benny how much you love it, he’s next to you.

“It’s a little sparse, I know.“ 

You look at him looking at the tree.

“Benny,” you stop to choke down the sob that’s building in your throat, “it’s wonderful. This tree is perfect. It’s all perfect.” 

And everything is. The garland he’s hung around your house. The haphazard fake frostiness added to the windows. The cinnamon scented candles he’s lit all around your living room. It’s like being in a snow globe after everything has settled.

“A lot of sap in here! Looks great. A little full. A lot of sap.”

You didn’t even catch that the television was on, but when you hear it, you know exactly what it is. You turn around and see that Benny has Christmas Vacation playing. That’s the thing that finally pushes you over the edge. This movie that you watched every Christmas Eve since you can remember. The movie that perfectly encapsulates what Christmas meant to you as a kid. The sadness you’ve been feeling and now suddenly the joy you’re experiencing because of Benny finally all bubbles to the surface.

You bury your face in his neck and start to cry for everything that you know you’ll miss but also for what you have right now. His body acts as a solid mass you can lock yourself to. Benny is kissing the top of your head and you’d be embarrassed if it was anyone else witnessing this. But with Benny you know he won’t judge you. He will give you exactly what you need, even when you don’t know you need it.

You pull back and look at him. He cups your face in his hands and brushes the tears from your face with his thumb.

“I miss him, Benny.” 

“You’re allowed to miss him.” 

When Benny says it, you feel like a weight has been lifted off of you. The weight of the self-inflicted punishment for mourning something that wasn’t perfect. You take a step back from him and look around the room again. You want to remember this moment as it is.

“This means everything to me. I hope you know that.”

“I have something else. Stay here.” 

Benny can feel his heart vibrating in his chest as he goes to the kitchen to grab a plate of cookies. He holds it behind his back until he’s in front of you. When you look down at the plate he sees you smile as you grab a wreath shaped cookie off the plate.

“You made these?”

Before he can answer you, you take a bite. He can see your face changing from excitement to what can only be described as delighted horror. Benny’s chest tightens knowing he messed something up.

“Uh….what’s wrong?”

“I think you mixed up the salt and sugar measurements.”

You see Benny’s face fall and you feel so bad that you finish the cookie in your hand and grab another one.

“Don’t eat it!” 

He quickly knocks the cookie out of your hand. You grab another one and he does the same thing. He drops the plate on the floor and it’s all so magically bizarre that you start laughing and can’t stop. You try to say something but you end up in a fit of giggles that makes Benny start laughing. 

“It’s happened to me before. Don’t worry about it.” You manage to wheeze the words out as you wipe the tears–happy tears–from your eyes.

Benny gets serious for a moment, “I just wanted this whole night to be perfect.”

You step over the pile of cookies on the floor and kiss him gently on the lips. He rests his hand on your low back and sighs into you. 

You whisper against his lips, “I can’t imagine anything more perfect than what you’ve done for me.”

Benny rests his forehead against yours, “I have one more thing for you. I didn’t bake it, so don’t worry.”

You smile, “I have something for you too.” 

You break out of his hold and go to the hallway closet. Benny crouches down and gathers the cookies that dropped on the floor back onto the plate. He can’t believe he used so much salt and didn’t even notice. As he’s placing the plate on your coffee table he sees you by the tree holding the wrapped box he spotted earlier. You pick up a thin box wrapped in plaid paper. You walk over to the couch and hand Benny his gift.

“Open yours first.” Benny nods to the gift wrapped in plaid paper that you’re holding as he sits down.

Benny watches you sit down as you carefully undo the ribbon and slide your finger underneath the tape. He’s never seen someone unwrap a gift so carefully and it makes him smile.

“Oh Benny, you remembered.” 

Benny watches you run your hand over the open box containing The Polar Express book set with the silver bell and cassette tape. He remembered the time the movie came on and you complained how it could never compare to the book illustrations and the William Hurt narration. You told him that you always listened to it as a family before you got too old to think it was cool. When you said it he saw the look on your face and he did what he always does; he filed it away.

“Guess who learned about Etsy this year?” 

The face Benny makes, causes you to laugh. The thought of him making an account and searching for this is a gift in and of itself.

“I would have paid to see that.” You look back at the book, “This is the best gift. Thank you.” 

You lean across the small gap between the two of you and kiss him. It’s deeper this time and you can feel the little moan that comes out of Benny’s mouth making you smile. The scratch of his facial hair on your face is a reminder to you that even though Benny seems tough on the outside he’s the exact opposite with you.

You shift back to your seat and nod at the gift Benny is turning over in his hands. He holds it still for a moment before opening it. He takes an opposite approach in unwrapping; ripping the ribbon off, and tearing through the paper. When he opens the box he’s surprised to see a watch that looks exactly like the one he had lost while he was out working on a case. This was right around the time you two had started dating and he wasn’t even aware you had ever paid attention to it. It was a watch he had worn forever—his favorite watch. And when he couldn’t find an exact replacement, he settled on a lesser watch, a watch that never quite measured up. But this, this was it. This was his watch.

“How did you—“

“You’re not the only Etsy user around here.” 

Benny laughs as he takes off the watch he’s wearing to put this one on. You had planned on finding it for his birthday, but it took longer than expected. You can’t even remember how many places you went searching for a watch you could only describe from memory. It was a gift that you bought to hopefully express your love to him when you were afraid to say the words out loud.

Benny grabs your hand and yanks you on top of him. His arm wraps around your waist, his brown eyes looking into you, trying to determine if it’s something he should say now or if he should wait. He knows he could have—should have—said it months ago. Now, there’s something now about the way you’re cradling his face with your hands. Or how your eyes are locked on his own, that is making him loopy.

“I love you..” he stammers to correct himself, “I’ve loved you.” 

He blurts it out like a criminal breaking down and confessing a crime. You’re both still and Benny’s worried he’s made a mistake. But then you run your hand over his hair and back down to his cheek–it makes Benny twitch. You kiss the crown of his head, the side of his nose, his jaw, and then his lips. 

“I love you too, Benny.”

Benny’s skin prickles when you say his name. He shifts so he’s more upright, holding you in his lap. 

“You’re so beautiful.” He buries his face in your chest and squeezes you against him. “I love you so much.” 

You’re thinking of how Benny’s hold on you feels like you’re finally home when something catches your eye through the window.

“I think it’s snowing?”

You climb off of Benny and you both turn to look out of the window. There’s a flurry of white flakes all around your front yard. Benny sees you staring slack jawed through the window and starts to laugh.

“Come on.” He stands up from the couch and tilts his head towards the front door. 

You get up and follow him outside onto your porch. You see a layer of snow covering the grass in your yard and don’t understand how it’s snowing in Los Angeles when it’s 70 degrees out. You stick your hand out and feel the crisp flakes land and melt into your palm.

“How?” You look at Benny and he’s smiling. He points to a man in the corner of your yard with some kind of machine and you finally realize where it’s coming from.

“Compliments of Big Nick!” The man yells it across the yard.

Benny can’t believe that shithead Nick came through. He knows he’ll be paying him back for the rest of his life. But when he looks at you watching the snow like it's some kind of Christmas miracle it doesn’t matter, Benny would pay him back ten lifetimes over. He feels the sting of tears in his eyes and pulls you to him resting his head on top of yours.

“Merry Christmas, Maple Bar.”

“Merry Christmas, Benny.”

[velvet-vox]

In the Murder Drones and Kung Fu Panda analysis, there's the typo of "thrusting" for "trusting" and "thrust" for "trust".

Fixed

[correctproseka]

ohhh ive got some opinions..... my main vote that i havent seen given yet is untrained panda rider emu because the way shes posed and the framing of it is uh. bad. second vote is untrained rainbow canvas homani because she looks like shes asphyxiating </3

Omteresfing opinions anons

.... I just woke up ahat was that typo