#twvo asks

[wvorstlydrawvncronus]

Out of the others in your sgrub session, who would you say you are closest to? Who are you the least close to?

vwell, im not a fan of most of the people i knowv.

if i had to pick out of my sessions group, maybe either kankri or aranea.

out of evweryone i knovw, though… eridans pretty cool. her ♠️ boyfriend is fine, too. hes kind of bitchy though.

my favworite is kankri.

[pesterloglog]

Meenah Peixes, Cronus Ampora

Act 6, page 5308

MEENAH: gonna make this quick

MEENAH: and this aint like a diving board for you to launch off about your feelins and romprobs

MEENAH: just gimme a straight answer

MEENAH: im gettin a posse together to kill an invincible monster you want in y/n

#yolo #even though #you can die twice?? #w/e

CRONUS: vwhoa, NICE. just got here, and youre already going diabolical, thats the tops.

CRONUS: id lovwe to help. you knowv howv i lovwe to help out, and be there for attractivwe people. thats kind of my thing?

CRONUS: but...

MEENAH: ugh here we go

CRONUS: meenah, i just dont think im in that kind of space nowv in my life. or afterlife, i mean.

MEENAH: what space

CRONUS: an aggressivwe space. ivwe been trying to cool it, be more introspectivwe, search my feelings, vwork on my music.

#grease my hair

CRONUS: i dont think id be much good in a fight. ivwe been trying to get in touch vwith vwho, or i guess vwhat, i really am, and i think ivwe been making some nice breakthroughs.

CRONUS: im telling you this in confidence, but i think im approaching a kind of avwakening, especially since i first started learning about humans. i think i actually might be...

MEENAH: nope

MEENAH: nope nope nope nopenopenope

#uh uh

MEENAH: stop saying whatever that was do not care

CRONUS: youre right, i shouldnt burden you vwith my problems.

CRONUS: forget i said anything. i vwouldnt vwant to compromise our friendship, not evwen to speak of the potential for us to devwelop into something more than just friends.

#by vwhich i mean twvo people vwho freely engage in sexual intercourse

CRONUS: oh, RIGHT. you asked me howv my music vwas going these days, didnt you?

MEENAH: no

CRONUS: its going pretty nicely, i think. been messing vwith dual sawvtooth vwavweforms, i think i really could be hitting on my signature sound.

#if not my signature shape at the vwery least

CRONUS: here, listen to this track. i vwrote it in anticipation of your arrivwal.

[ punkin cravwings (bubstep mix) ]

MEENAH: not clickin that

CRONUS: um, i see. then, vwhat about...

[ punkin party in sea hipsters vwater apocalypse ]

MEENAH: nah

[ lunar lust ]

[ aquasex renegade ]

[ less pale more pail ]

MEENAH: ew

#creep

CRONUS: vwait... i probably shouldnt havwe showvn you those. ok, hold on. i knowv i havwe something here youll dig.

[ giwve him another look ]

[ under your fins all along ]

[ vwe put the us in royal flushes ]

MEENAH: so that was a no to my invite then

MEENAH: which got rescinded halfway thru this convo anyways

MEENAH: time to jet before before you sketch me out some more crotimes

[hazyaltcare]

moodboard for an emo cronus ampora, and a moodboard for an emo dirk strider pls?

i can split these up into twvo requests if youd prefer :)

thxx

Yes, please do send these as seperate asks. This is cited in our rules. /nm

Mod Haze

[prawvnus]

ZZ: O i wvonder if any of my friends wvould wvanna take a pic together

[shittycronusdaily]

lil idiot fish yeah little idiot fsh want a crumpet yeh I bet u do little little man boy stupid horned flaccid cocnut

vwisual representation of vwhat happened to me vwhen i read these twvo asks

[casanovasadmiral]

Good evening once more! How has your day been, Cronus? Did orientation go well, if I may ask?

-🧺

real vwell! got to see twvo exhibits, had an hour break, then got my training. owverall pretty amazing. lets see hovw it growvs on me.

[svweettalk]

wow that long ask is clearly from nepeta

bro i knovw twvo nepetas.

[ask-the-bloodswap-folks]

Karkat and cronus had been in the tank for a while,soon he swam to the edge "AYE CRO, IM GONNA GO GET CHANGED... I'LL COME BACK ONCE IM DRY...YOU HAVE TOWELS IN YOUR BLOCK RIGHT?" //with the surplus of weird lewd karkat items being given ..I wanted him to find em\\

Cronus nods without thinking, stretching as he pops his head back up out of the water.

“Yeah, there should be one or twvo in there.”

M!A on: No Self Control [22/40]

M!A on: Merman [8/20]

@ask-the-odd-trolls

[trolldannyzuko]

thanks to tumblrs 8RILLIANT notification system and its regular habit of failing to complete its one single functional purpose, the twvo asks that i managed to accumulate betvween the last time i vwas online and nowv havwe gone ENTIRELY unacknowvledged. this is unacceptable, and i think my former best friend davwid karp is about to get an earful. anyone vwho thinks they can vwithhold fanmail from someone vwho vwalues correspondence as dearly as i do has a vwhole vworld of pain in for them if they dont pony up a proper explanation.

[caepaecaesurae]

> Cae + Nad : Gossip

caepaecaesurae So I'm getting better about lovwers trolljacksparrow yeah? caepaecaesurae I'm actually trying all that again A bit trolljacksparrow ooh anyone specific in mind/any takers yet, lovve?

caepaecaesurae I appear to havwe horrible taste Or At least slightly questionable trolljacksparrow ehehehehehhe cmon cmon wwho is it caepaecaesurae Oh tsk like you'vwe nevwer had that realisation about anything you'vwe wvillingly gotten yourself into ... Ringleader, twvice. trolljacksparrow ringleader??????/ ring???? leader??????? RINGLEADER????? caepaecaesurae I wvas a trickster one of those times and it turned out fine, so trolljacksparrow ring "HHuHhHHhurrrgghhhh ive never submitted to anything not even a stoplight, hurggggghhhh, i am very tough sexually everyone needs to know this" leader??? caepaecaesurae You knowv, wve're both old and lazy and get bored trolljacksparrow oh my god??? (dont misunderstand, i support you!) but oh my god! caepaecaesurae Honestly, entirely reasonable trolljacksparrow HONEY, howw is your taste so bad! ....ok but howw did it go caepaecaesurae Also your description is delightful I don't knowv, magic? trolljacksparrow ehehehehehehe caepaecaesurae Wvell, it wvent wvell enough for a second round trolljacksparrow ayyyyy/ caepaecaesurae It's purposefully a bit intermittant to avwoid getting terribly attached, but I think there'll be a third at some point trolljacksparrow (terribly attached on wwhich side?) i wwould literally nevver havve seen this coming. like. literally nevver. caepaecaesurae wvell, I'm stupid and he's prone to obsession, so either wvay, really. trolljacksparrow if someone wwas like  "dude, dude, your kismesis is gonna bang that one guy (tm)" i wwould not havve believved them pffff holy fuck man ok but honestly, good on you trolljacksparrow hell yeah highfivve caepaecaesurae haha High fivwe, chief. I havwe no idea wvhat I'm doing wvith myself, but.. it's good to get out there. And he's not all bad.  If you scoot the bad bits off the plate there's things left It's alright trolljacksparrow yeah, i actually like got along wwith him that one time after he freaked out that i wwas going to do vviolence upon him hes not all bad, surprisingly >That 'haha' kinda makes you feel bad. Should you be, like, more supportive? Or something? caepaecaesurae "I'm thinking of you naked" wvas the line that wvorked on him by the wvay. trolljacksparrow FUCK L O L caepaecaesurae He wvas surprised trolljacksparrow FANTASTIC caepaecaesurae It wvas pretty good trolljacksparrow nice!! you fuckin smooth operator hahahahaha caepaecaesurae I don't remember wvhat it wvas during the trickster thing I think it wvas something like "I'm easy and interested" I havwe no idea wvhat people consider smooth or wvhy trolljacksparrow ehehehehehe yeah honestly most of the times me neither but dude, lets celebrate, like, hell yeah broadening horizons and all that noise caepaecaesurae :) trolljacksparrow ://) !! caepaecaesurae Te amo trolljacksparrow te amo! tea ammo! all of that! trolljacksparrow (fucking ringleader. unbelievable.) trolljacksparrow (TWWELVVE FEET TALL) caepaecaesurae He's rather fond of my teeth I'm not used to getting compliments about that that don't sound like comparisons to beartraps trolljacksparrow thats a mood sexy sexy beartraps caepaecaesurae He's also remarkably considerate and careful WVith a backup just in case trolljacksparrow thats fantastic! a backup? like, threesomes? caepaecaesurae wvell I meant my extra teeth Most beartraps havwe only the one rowv trolljacksparrow OH yeah ivve nevver hunted bears, i dont knoww i thought it tied into the considerate part and like yeah that wwould be considerate but clarification wwas needed caepaecaesurae Aye, I'm not quite up to several-somes yet trolljacksparrow you can wwork up to it, it takes time to build stamina ://P caepaecaesurae Speaking of Ringleader though, do you see the post he responded to?  The one wvhere cherry shrimp spoke up trolljacksparrow ....im trying to imagine sollux vvantas on a date wwith ringleader "fucking ringleader" makara and i am FAILING MISERABLY caepaecaesurae Same It's almost majestic trolljacksparrow just. i cant picture them in the same room evven but just caepaecaesurae Nowv try to imagine his moirail's spin on this trolljacksparrow the mind cant handle that many possiblities oh my goD HAHAHAHAHA caepaecaesurae This is entirely my fault and I can't find myself minding trolljacksparrow you arrange beautiful things, sometimes caepaecaesurae The boy's a damn boxer and I think Ringleader wvould respect that trolljacksparrow he is, but hes also like i mean i dont think ringleader is immune to sollux vvantas cause NO ONE IS, APPARENTLY caepaecaesurae Sollux VWantas. trolljacksparrow JUST LOOK AT HIM AUGH sollux vvwwantas anywway i still cant fucking picture it but if it happens itll be glorious caepaecaesurae Imagine Sollux VWantas and Ringleader aiming for casual lovwers, and the moirail wvandering directly into a terrible pitch court wvith Ringleader if she isn't already spoken for in pitch trolljacksparrow i mean, hed probably find a lot of wways to piss her off, but that? wwould end in fire caepaecaesurae She'd be a brat, and his dedication to her health wvould rest entirely on her moirail's shoulders And as wve all knowv, Sollux VWantas trolljacksparrow yea wwe really do then again ringleader, wwho is apparently super blunt, might be the only person to be blunt enough for the boy wwho didnt realize wwhat pinching someones ass indicated caepaecaesurae I think Ringleader is the only responsible adult invwolvwed, and that's going to be fascinating to hear about ovwer drinks somenight trolljacksparrow ovver a lot of drinks caepaecaesurae Probably it wvon't go anywvhere caepaecaesurae But it's interesting to think about trolljacksparrow hahahaha yeah caepaecaesurae Anywvay I thought I'd keep you in the loop About Ringleader "Yes that one" Makara trolljacksparrow i appreciate it! keep me in the loop about any others, yeah? (like im fine wwith evverything i just. wwant gossip) caepaecaesurae I'll try dearest If it evwer comes to someone wvhere the secret wvould be hard but important to me to keep, wvould you rather struggle wvith it or not be technically sure? trolljacksparrow wwho could you possibly fuck that requires covvert ops, babe but like caepaecaesurae If someone has clade wvho are vwiolently opposed to highbloods for example, or wvho havwe terrible history wvith Amporas specifically ... caepaecaesurae If someone has clade wvho mistrust me specifically due to some long-ago argument If I evwer make it wvith a VWriska trolljacksparrow ok i just gotta outline that if anyone tries to mess wwith you ill hand them their spine noww that thats done wwith hhm, i dont knoww. like... i wwant to support you, yeah? but also, like, im just......i wwouldnt betray you, evver caepaecaesurae Oh surely, and I appreciate it caepaecaesurae I knowv you wvouldn't I'm just asking if you'd prefer juicy gossip, or havwing things easy not havwing to keep track of wvho knowvs wvhat trolljacksparrow im thinking about that because on one hand fuuuuck i lovve gossip but on the other hand i often havve a hard time wwith like not freaking out ovver direct lying? so its like wwhat are the odds that someone comes up to me and is like HEY ARE CAE AND X FUCKING and im unable to say 'hey. fuck you' (id do it anywway, like, despite the thing, it just might not be effectivve) so its like caepaecaesurae Higher than you'd think, hypothetically! trolljacksparrow make your best judgment of like wwhat thats just like, my clade i guess is it only hypothetically? caepaecaesurae ... There's someone else, and I do think you'd havwe an easier time of it if I'm not specific.  The one you'd be trying not to lie to is Sparks, for possibly a swveep or fivwe until a fewv things wvork out. If it lasts that long caepaecaesurae But at the same time, I lovwe and trust you. trolljacksparrow mmmm yeah. caepaecaesurae And it's important I not try to ovwer-control things trolljacksparrow okay i havve no idea wwhat that means in relation to all this but like yeah, aight like, dont tell me >Man, you're put out by this more than you anticipated. trolljacksparrow >Why can't you enjoy gossip. caepaecaesurae Te amo, dearest.  If any rough spots evwer get wvorked out so secrecy isn't an issue, or if it doesn't wvork out so it can be a past-tense secret rather than an ongoing one, I'll be sure to let you knowv first thing But.. I'm getting out there, and it's rare and precious and newv, and I havwe rather awvkwvard taste But hey, wvhat else is newv trolljacksparrow sent a GIF caepaecaesurae You and Kankri are the only ones wvho knowv about a vwisit or twvo to Ringleader And you're the only one wvho knowvs he's not the only one trolljacksparrow ! i adore you trolljacksparrow once again, anyone troubles you ill fucking delimb them, but yeah caepaecaesurae WVarm thoughts for cold evwenings trolljacksparrow oh, and by the wway trolljacksparrow you offered up a lot of scenarios back then, right caepaecaesurae Back wvhen? trolljacksparrow back wwhen i wwas like oh dude wwhat reason could you possibly havve to havve a tactical dick appointment relying on james bondery and secrecy caepaecaesurae Aye, that I did trolljacksparrow and you specifically mentioned making it wwith a vvriska... caepaecaesurae Sparks looks rather dimly on those trolljacksparrow that he does, that he does but also trolljacksparrow also wwell caepaecaesurae Unrelated sidenote, I'm trading holiday gifts wvith his VWriska nowv and again. trolljacksparrow stop interrupting my dramatic fucking revveal for fucks sake! are you a bloody ampora or wwhat! fucking unbelievvable caepaecaesurae She's dead, but her ghost is about. You're wvelcome and I am suddenly all ears trolljacksparrow thank god! okay anywway funny you should mention making it wwith a vvriska.... because i got c3<ed to one for like half a swweep. (AAAAAAAAAAAAAYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY DID FUCKING ANYONE SEE THAT COMING) caepaecaesurae Ashen? Absolutely baffled trolljacksparrow yes, topleaf! caepaecaesurae But nowv that you mention it, I can only think of one that you speak to much online... trolljacksparrow ://) caepaecaesurae WVell damn Good showv keeping that one quiet, howv havwe you managed? caepaecaesurae Keeping it off Sparks' radar alone must havwe been tricky trolljacksparrow ://)!! trolljacksparrow yeah!! theres some people that knoww but not a lot and ITS SO DIFFICULT i just wwant to openly affection at her but  i cant my beautiful sharp fighty ashenmate caepaecaesurae Side-leavwes, or is one of you the top? trolljacksparrow im the topleaf! she's a marvvel and a delight and she brightens my life and this is a god damn secret, okay angel? caepaecaesurae Swvorn and sealed trolljacksparrow i asked to tell you the moment you mentioned a vvriska because, oh my god, the opportunity, "in case i make it vwith a wvriska" "GUESS WWHAT (//: ", just, damn caepaecaesurae I wvish you the dearest of luck wvith her, Serkets are... tricky. trolljacksparrow she made a vvery elaborate threat against your wwell-being if you fuck this up belovved, it wwas practically ornate caepaecaesurae My good luck, then Thank you for not directly sharing the threat. trolljacksparrow you wwont mess this up though so no wworries! like theres nothing to mess up caepaecaesurae I wvon't be getting in her wvay trolljacksparrow oh honey its just "dont tell this to people" not "gtfo" caepaecaesurae Aye, all's wvell trolljacksparrow (i knoww that serkets arent rays of moonbeams though, so dont wworry) trolljacksparrow also im her topleaf so if she does get upset wwith you shed havve to talk it out wwith me caepaecaesurae I appreciate it Again, I wvon't be interfering or risking your quadrant. Believwe it or not I knowv my wvay around a secret or twvo trolljacksparrow you and your mystery beau ://P caepaecaesurae Eh That's days old I wvouldn't call it wvorth being proud of keeping quiet yet trolljacksparrow doesnt it givve such a rogueish air to the wwhole thing? also im gonna come bother you in person if youre not super busy caepaecaesurae <3< trolljacksparrow <3< !!! trolljacksparrow >Nadaya is definitely finding Cae and cuddling up to him and purring super contently. His. >He might look slightly :c but he tries very hard not to let it show. caepaecaesurae > ..and Cae's definitely a little distant-eyed and faintly sad, but very fond of cuddles and hanging out comfortably. trolljacksparrow >...Cae gets finpets, and Nadaya promptly hoists himself into Cae's lap, and sighs. "Look, fucking, she didnt actually make the threat she just told me to tell you that she made an elaborate threat, I'm sorry, I didn't realize, just look--" and you show him this: https://puu.sh/zihDF/5648ce76f9.png caepaecaesurae > His mouth opened and closed once as he absorbed that, fins shifting slightly, before pinning a bit and lowering.  His cheeks heated, lighting slightly, and he glanced away > He gave a small awkward shoulder pat, and a nod. trolljacksparrow > Nadaya kissed him directly on the tip of his nose. "I'm sorry beloved," and a hair ruffle, Nadaya is gonna be comfortable all over him. caepaecaesurae "...sorry, chief," he murmered back. trolljacksparrow "hey it's fine, it's okay, don't worry about it, yeah," Cae's neck gets nuzzled, purr starting up. This is fine, it's a fine way to spend time. caepaecaesurae "...You got wvorried enough to come ovwer." trolljacksparrow "i mean, you say this as if i dont love spending time with you?" Nadaya curled a hand in the fabric of Cae's shirt, a picture of peace on his kismesis. "you're stressed from unrelated reasons too, so its like... i dont want you to be sad," he finished lamely, sighing and nuzzling. ".............i wwouldnt let her. it wwas just, a lack-of-trust thing that manifested badly." caepaecaesurae > Arms gently closed around him, and Cae rested his cheek in Nadaya's hair, carefully, trying to avoid as many charms and knives as possible.  One or two was fine. "...Aye.  WVe'll see howv much she trusts or distrusts." "..I'll be myself, and wve'll see if that's enough." trolljacksparrow >Nadaya's purr intensified at that, fins fluttering. Hugs! Hell yeah! A part of him hoped Cae gets a weird imprint from the charms. "yeah - and, i'm serious, it wwont come to vviolence, swworn and sealed and all that." caepaecaesurae > He acquired a small smile, only slightly sad.  Nadaya was more reassuring than he had any right to be, though. "..I knowv my pan plays tricks on me, lovwe.  WVe'll see howv it goes."

[palteringcecutiency]

> Psii: Be... reasonable.

palteringcecutiency ...I suppose I should answer your question, now that I am... around, again, but. Seeing as no one else is ignoring what transpired, it seems... pointless, to attempt here. Unless your perspective suggests something else.

caepaecaesurae I'm playing second fiddle here chief, I'll followv your lead. Seems reasonable enough

palteringcecutiency ...you needn't.

caepaecaesurae I seem to consistently get it wvrong wvhen I don't

palteringcecutiency ...succumbing to fear isn't the answer either, you realize. Especially when... misplaced.

caepaecaesurae I'm glad you had a good evwening, wvith wvhoevwer you vwisited wvith that night

palteringcecutiency Dodges aren't either, especially with one who... regrets, that it has come to this.

caepaecaesurae I'm just trying to agree wvith you.

palteringcecutiency And I am trying to find out how much of that is because I theoretically could come after you again out of anger. ...so perhaps I could lessen that.

caepaecaesurae Not a convwersation I expected

palteringcecutiency ...before, I would have agreed, but. I must admit, this. Was on my mind, from the beginning, of this.

caepaecaesurae I'vwe nevwer had much luck guessing wvhat's on your mind

palteringcecutiency ...as were my intentions, a small advantage where few were had. But. ...never this, you shouldn't... be this... terrified, of me. Of things that won't happen.

caepaecaesurae You keep referring to it as fear, and I'm not sure I prefer that phrasing

palteringcecutiency Because of inaccuracies or because it is too... blunt?

caepaecaesurae It's at least partly my ego complaining.

palteringcecutiency Pardon, then, to your ego, but I am not exactly here to pander to it. It'd hardly be... helpful.

caepaecaesurae It's noticeably easier to answver direct questions wvhen I'm not fighting a wvar on twvo fronts

palteringcecutiency ...then what term would balance between not ruffling feathers and not obfuscating matters too deeply?

caepaecaesurae I.. often use vwagueries like "upset". I barely let Kankri use wvords more specific

palteringcecutiency Your... inclinations, towards avoidance and away from the... precise, is hard to miss. But. They do the problem a... disservice.

caepaecaesurae Alternia has done most of us a disservwice in the skills it taught. There are times that I see in you a friend that I havwe missed, and mourned, and sorely do not deservwe, as you havwe reminded me on many occasions. There are times that I see the man that deservwes to avwenge himself, but believwes he cannot, wvith the temperament that ensures a change in those wvinds could come at any time wvith no wvarning. Surely, if I knewv howv to comport myself, I could dodge wvhatevwer it is that makes our convwersations periodically end in flames. ...but I don't. All I can do is my best, and try not to say the wvrong thing Yet.

palteringcecutiency ...it is not that I believe I cannot claim vengeance, it is that... it, disgusts me. There is no solution, there is nothing to soothe it, believe me Cronus, I have tried. This entire time, I have tried, but... to kill you would only bring backlashes to make everything oh so much worse, to turn the tables... I. I cannot give you what I... received. I. The thought twists at me, it. Is not a thing I want. Reparation... what would begin to ease this? I. Do not know. ...and now my pan speaks of friendship, of time spent in enjoyment, of... how much I miss you, despite what happened. Torment...is more hollow now, than before, if this is... what happens, instead of... anything else. ...perhaps, then, things should... change, so things stop... ending in flames.

caepaecaesurae I don't knowv howv, but it sounds nice.

palteringcecutiency I've. Being a trickster... tipped my cards to the table, so. It seems... foolish, to pretend I... still hold those secrets. I. Can promise nothing, but. Perhaps that will help.

caepaecaesurae Secrets?  That you miss friendship?

palteringcecutiency ...that I'm harmless.

caepaecaesurae I think you havwe a broad definition of that wvord

palteringcecutiency ...and perhaps you are... too... jumpy, to believe me.

caepaecaesurae An unfortunate irony Perhaps wve're both on more equal footing than wve tend to like to believwe

palteringcecutiency Are we?

caepaecaesurae WVe're both just here. No one wvants to choose betwveen us, and no one is going to. WVe are both strong, and free, and havwe no idea howv to handle that.

palteringcecutiency Mn.

caepaecaesurae I don't knowv. I don't knowv howv to do anything but followv your lead, here.

palteringcecutiency ...and if I am... just as lost?

caepaecaesurae Then wve'll fumble around until wve find something.

palteringcecutiency ...is that. Something you want?

caepaecaesurae Do you?

palteringcecutiency Does your answer hinge on mine?

caepaecaesurae Is it wvorth it to hurt ourselvwes seeking a peace that you don't wvant? I miss being your friend, but all too often wvhat I wvant isn't wvhat's right or best.

palteringcecutiency So that makes your opinion on the matter worthless? It's just as pointless to fight for something only one of us wants if that person is me.

caepaecaesurae It sounds like wve both wvant to find some path through this.

palteringcecutiency I would agree, aside from one of us hedging around the edges to avoid committing to anything.

caepaecaesurae

palteringcecutiency

caepaecaesurae Then there wve go

palteringcecutiency Then there we go. c:

caepaecaesurae I havwe no idea wvhat trying to be friends wvill look like.

palteringcecutiency ...I wish I could say, I am. Sorely out of practice. Aside from calling you on your avoidance, that certainly will remain.

caepaecaesurae I'll try to let you knowv if it gets wvorse. I'm not as robust as I once wvas.

palteringcecutiency Which in particular? There... is certainly a lot between us that can... get worse.

caepaecaesurae My nerwes act up sometimes. If it's a bad night, and something's too much

palteringcecutiency ...something I can. Understand well.

caepaecaesurae I havwen't alwvays been particularly diplomatic or helpful about subjects like that.  I'm starting to acquire a familiarity. Unfortunately. It's a wvork in progress.

palteringcecutiency ...what can I do to ease that?

caepaecaesurae I don't knowv.

palteringcecutiency :c

caepaecaesurae There's no general guidelines to givwe, nothing I could justify asking, just If I need a break I'll try to mention it.

palteringcecutiency ...ask anyway. If it's unreasonable, I'll say as such and move on.

caepaecaesurae I don't take accusations and fault wvell, wvhich is particularly inconvwenient wvhen I am actually at fault for things. I don't take unpredictability wvell, wvhere things seem initially fine and then suddenly there's a wvhirlwvind of consequences that are my owvn fault and must be dealt wvith. There's no real wvay to guard me from my owvn shortsightedness.

palteringcecutiency ...and yet you wish to try for friendship with me? Enough... to subject yourself to... all of that? Constantly?

caepaecaesurae I miss being able to take all that. I miss being sure that anyone wvas joking. I miss talking that wvay, and you.

palteringcecutiency ...I cannot say anything about accusations, as I am... me, mostly, but. I can be straightforward, and invite questions if things grow hazy.

caepaecaesurae It helps. In the end wve'll just do our best, and it wvill wvork or it wvon't, and that's fine. I don't havwe the right to ask you to bend ovwer backwvards for this, and I don't wvant you to. WVe'll see wvhat wve can do.

palteringcecutiency You're hardly the first to ask me to talk plainly, and I'm fully capable, I assure you.

caepaecaesurae Is it really being your friend if I don't let you be yourself?

palteringcecutiency ...obfuscation is a tactic, not who I am Cronus. A thought spoken plainly is the same thought told through twists and turns.

caepaecaesurae WVe are wvhat wve say and wvhat wve do

palteringcecutiency Then you'd best tell Kankri that he's been repressing my true self somehow, as I speak plainly with him.

caepaecaesurae Kankri is magic.

palteringcecutiency Nadaya, then.

caepaecaesurae I havwe no idea, wvith that one.

palteringcecutiency Perhaps because your pontificating is pretty theorizing rather than what actually happens.

caepaecaesurae Thank you, my theories are vwery pretty. I garden them carefully and wvith skill, and arrange them just so.

palteringcecutiency It's very well done work, you've absolutely invested quite some time into getting them just right, and perfect for display. It's such a shame that the moment they leave the greenhouse, they kick it.

caepaecaesurae WVell, nothing's perfect.

palteringcecutiency Alas, and we can only mourn what could be. And admit that I'm right.

caepaecaesurae I'm not evwen sure wvhat wve're talking about anymore, so likely enough.

palteringcecutiency That a minor change in the presentation of information does not suddenly make me a fake impostor, nor you a horrid friend for requesting it of me.

caepaecaesurae I'll havwe to take your wvord for it

palteringcecutiency I suppose you will, seeing as I'll be doing it regardless of if you've actually asked it of me.

caepaecaesurae That should be an experience to behold I'll look forwvard to it

palteringcecutiency c: I'll make sure there is a fainting couch available.

caepaecaesurae I'll be sure to make a showv of it evwery time I use it.

palteringcecutiency I expect nothing less. c:

caepaecaesurae > ..It was strange not to see the little smiles as an immediate threat, but a pleasant novelty.  Cronus really had missed his friend.

palteringcecutiency > You'd be glad to hear that, if you ever do. In fact, you were expecting him to request that you abstain from the emotes entirely, before you got distracted with being stubborn and correct. Perhaps you'll ask him about it first. However-

...I feel the need to say good light, as I'm drifting and this is decidedly not aflame.

caepaecaesurae It's been a pleasure talking to you. Rest wvell.

palteringcecutiency Likewise. c:

[spidersfanfics]

Red Sweaters and Leather Jackets

Kankri was having trouble focusing on what Cronus was talking about today. Normally he was very good at listening to what Cronus had to say but today, he couldn't help but get distracted by the greaser himself.

In fact for a while now, Kankri had found himself falling for Cronus, against his better judgement. He was hesitant to admit this however.

What if Cronus didn't feel the same way? He had always seemed to only see Kankri as a friend.

Suddenly, Kankri noticed that Cronus had stopped talking. How long had there been scilence? "Yes?" Kankri asked sheepishly.

Cronus chuckled, "Done daydreamin' chief?"

Kankri blushed "S9rry Cr9nus, c9uld y9u repeat what y9u just said? I'm afraid I was a 6it distracted."

Cronus shrugged, "Don't wvorry about it, nothin' important anywvays."

"Are y9u sure?"

"Yeah, yeah, I'm sure. You'vwe heard my whole speech before anywvays. Same old stupid, humankin stuff again.

"I d9n't think it's stupid. I d9 try t9 see you as a human 6ecause if that's what y9u want then I will respect y9u."

Cronus smiled, "That's swveet of you to say." He paused for a moment. "Hey Kankri, kind if off topic, but there's somethin' that's been on my mind for a wvhile and, I think wve need to talk."

"What is it?" Kankri's mind immediately started coming up with worse case scenarios. "Have I d9ne s9mething t9 9ffend you? I'm s9rry I haven't 6een paying much attenti9n lately. 9r was it s9mething else?"

Cronus cut him off, "Kankri, you didn't do anythin' wvrong, I promise."

"Then has s9me9ne else d9ne s9mething? Was Mituna n9t respecting y9u again? Was P9rrim 69thering y9u? I t9ld her t9 st9p."

"No, it's nothing like that. Just listen. Kankri, you're a really great guy and you're the only person wvho really listens to me so I just wvanted to say. Wvell." He sighed.

"Cr9nus, whatever it is, y9u can tell me."

"I like you, a lot."

"P-pardon?"

"I knowv I shouldn't because you don't do quadrants and shit but-

"#9ffensive language" Kankri interrupted, "S9rry, c9ntinue."

Cronus chuckled, "Wvell, I wvas wvonderin' if you'd wvant to be my boyfriend?"

Kankri thought for a moment, "6oyfriend, as in, human dating?"

"Yeah cause I wvas just thinking that, wvell human datin' and quadrants are twvo different things so you could, you knowv, date me and still not do quadrants."

"Cr9nus, this is, very unexpected-"

"I get it if you say no. Most people do, I mean you're a great friend and all but I get it if you dont like me that wvay."

"Cr9nus."

"I just had to get it off my chest. I wvas goin' crazy not tellin' ya."

"Cr9nus!"

"Sorry, I'm ramblin' wvorse than you chief." Cronus sighed and looked away, embarrassed.

"Cr9nus, it's 9k, I want t9 6e your 69yfriend."

"Wvait, really?"

"I've actually liked y9u f9r a while n9w. I just didn't want t9 say anything 6ecause I didn't think y9u liked me 6ack." Kankri looked away, had he said too much?

Cronus was silent for a moment then suddenly, Kankri felt himself get pulled into a hug. "Human lovwe you chief."

Kankri smiled and tilted his head back to kiss his new boyfriend."I love you too Cronus."

[deterministpalindrome]

==> Pal: Whine.

caepaecaesurae I'm sorry that my fusion wvith her wvas wvhat I wvill sorely understate as offputting, and particularly that I wvas incognizant of exactly howv much so.  And that that continues to be an ongoing issue. I don't think saying that wvill solvwe anything, and don't expect it to be a good time for a full talk, I just thought I should get that out there wvhile I had the wvords.

deterministpalindrome ...thank2. for liike 2ayiing that and 2hiit.

caepaecaesurae I'm..glad I didn't manage to say it wvrong.

deterministpalindrome you diid pretty good. nothiing ii could poiint at and 2ay thii2 need2 fiixed.

caepaecaesurae The only dowvnside is a lack of direction wvhere to look next.  ..  I'll keep re-reading.  WVe'll see if I can manage it twvice. .. Sorry, I'll be off.

deterministpalindrome ii mean. you don't have two? but ii can get why you'd go and 2tuff. and ii bet you can yeah? do iit twiice. you're not a 2louch at fiiguriing out 2hiit don't 2ee why thii2 wouldn't be the 2ame

caepaecaesurae You seem... much less frustrated.

deterministpalindrome ii'm 2tiill up2et but you're tryiing yeah? and ii don't wanna 2hiit on that. ...plu2 ii'm tryiing really hard two be calm for nd

caepaecaesurae Apparently Karkat is wvith him nowv.  I hope he finds more people he's wvilling to trust, wvhile he's here. > ...You can appreciate the rest of what Pal said, but don't know how to acknowledge it yet, so decide not to. The younger, vwersion of Nadaya, I mean.

deterministpalindrome good. and 2ame he'2 told me ii'm 2haped liike a friiend and that iif ii giive hiim warniing ii could 2ee hiim iin per2on but ii'm keepiing my dii2tance untiil he a2k2 for me

caepaecaesurae Possibly for the best, at least for tonight.

deterministpalindrome yeah =[ he'2 got enough 2hiit two deal wiith ii'm not beiing a diick and demand ii'm one of them yeah?

caepaecaesurae I'vwe offered a hand if evwer he needs it, but I'm also wvaiting until he decides it's wvorth invwestigating.

deterministpalindrome 2ame ju2t put iit out there iin ca2e he need2 2omethiing 2o he ha2 place2 two turn ...miight not be able two do a lot but at lea2t iit'2 2omethiing

caepaecaesurae Anyone fool enough to tangle wvith him wvill be havwing some problems. .. I think he'll be alright.  He has plenty of trolls offering assistance.

deterministpalindrome a lot of problem2 of variiou2 kiind2 and amount2 huff. yeah 2o do ii. plu2 he'2 nd 2tiill iit'2 not liike he ha2n't 2urviived iin weiirder ciircum2tance2 before. iidk ii ju2t really want two drape over hiim and growl at thiing2 except that'd be up2ettiing for liike forty rea2on2 2o

caepaecaesurae I havwe more than a bit of sympathy for that problem.

deterministpalindrome bluh. 2orry of cour2e you do ii'm ju2t whiiniing.

caepaecaesurae Justifiably I'm sure Karkat wvill be able to vwouch for you if you ask.

deterministpalindrome 2tiill. and yeah he probably could but ii'm not gonna do iit tiill nd want2 iit whiiniing or no whiiniing. ii'm not pu2hiing a 2iingle boundry damn iit he de2erve2 that much at lea2t.

caepaecaesurae Aye.  .. I think there are many of us, wvatching concernedly from afar.

deterministpalindrome ii don't doubt that for a 2econd iif not for hii2 ea2e then for a de2iire two not be 2hanked

caepaecaesurae A healthy mix of the twvo. I suspect it wvould be possible to avwoid being shanked, but not wvithout upsetting him.

deterministpalindrome yeah =[ god ii hope he fiind2 2ome place 2afe at 2ome poiint beiing that 2cared of everythiing ii2 not fuckiing fun

caepaecaesurae ... He has a crimson he's decided is nice, and his ship, and the armor I'vwe littered his quarters wvith.

deterministpalindrome ...true. bluh

caepaecaesurae I hope his time improvwes, but he at least has stability and wvhatevwer resources he's wvilling to trust

deterministpalindrome yeah 2orry about thii2 2hock of 2hock2 pal captor ii2 worriied about 2omethiing dumb two be over

caepaecaesurae The sentiment is shared, largely. I knowv Nadaya tends to be thick as thievwes wvith anyone he glances at twvice, and I knowv he's wvith Xanthe and Sparks in a fewv respects.  Does he havwe something wvith you, beyond clade and friendship?

deterministpalindrome no we're ju2t clademate2

caepaecaesurae Pardon the inquiry then, it's hard to keep track of sometimes.

deterministpalindrome eheh iit'2 fiine thiing2 2hiift all over the place. but nah ii have full quad2 and ii'm not poly or anythiing 2o. not really avaiilable.

caepaecaesurae Heh.  Nadaya is a firestorm and a cyclone, and there's little telling wvhen someone wvill be drawvn in. That wvill keep my mental maps of the clade simpler though.

deterministpalindrome can't argue wiith eiither of tho2e eheh

[shittycronusdaily]

got any quadrants filled?

i made twvo responses to this ask so

heres your second response^

[vwanity]

Late Day Conversations

vwamp.

vwell, tell me wvhen you're free? vwe can hang out and stuff.

rudefioh

1T WOULD BE MUCH S1MPLER FOR YOU TO TELL ME WHAT YOU'D L1KE, AND 1'LL MAKE T1ME FOR YOU D1RECTLY. MY SCHEDULE 1S NOT SO PRED1CTABLE, OR MALLEABLE! HOW MANY T1MES MUST 1 TELL YOU TH1S???BES1DES, FREEDOM 1S RELAT1VE!!! 1'M CHA1NED TO A NUMBER OF TH1NGS AT ANY G1VEN MOMENT. EVEN 1F THE CHA1NS ARE SELF-1MPOSED AND 1NV1S1BLE!

vwamp.

friday at day?

-------- 15 nights later

vwamp. 

oh, sorry for not talking more, got incredibly busy.anywvays, howv are you doing?

rudefioh

ER... WELL, 1 COULD SAY! AND 1 W1LL SAY THAT, BECAUSE 1T 1S TRUE.1'M DO1NG VERY WELL!TALK AS MUCH OR AS L1TTLE AS YOU WANT! 1 HARDLY EVEN NOT1CE E1THER WAY, TO BE COMPLETELY HONEST.A SL1GHT, SL1GHT D1FFERENCE TO ME!

vwamp.

i just didn't havwe the time to either, really.think vwe can fit a hang out friday?

rudefioh

TRY1NG TO STEAL AWAY ANOTHER ONE OF MY COVETED FR1DAYS, ARE YOU?NO D1CE!

vwamp. 

alright dude.

rudefioh

"DUDE"? 1 DON'T L1KE THAT... 1T FEELS RATHER CASUAL.WHY DON'T WE ST1CK TO S1R DUDE?MUCH MORE RESPECTFUL!!!

vwamp.

hahaha.

rudefioh

}:)

vwamp.

sure, sir dude. ok that is too hilarious, i can't.

rudefioh

NOT ANY FUNN1ER THAN DUDE BY 1TSELF, THOUGH!!!

vwamp.

damn, am i that serious?are you revwoking my 'dude' usage?i'll make a dude card and mail it to you, just for the sake of the joke.

rudefioh

1 HAVE SCRAMBLED MY COORD1NATES UPWARDS OF THREE THOUSAND T1MES S1NCE OUR LAST RENDEZVOUS! YOU W1LL FACE ONE HELL OF A CHALLENGE ACCOMPL1SH1NG THAT... ACTUALLY, 1 1MPLORE YOU TO TRY.

vwamp.

that is too much effort.

rudefioh

NO DR1VE, NO AMB1T1ON... TCH!

vwamp.

tch.

rudefioh

TCH. }:P

vwamp.

i suddenly feel inside of a cartoon.ZZ:P

rudefioh

YEAH, YEAH... AT LEAST THEN WE COULD T1MESK1P TO THE NATURAL CONCLUS1ON OF TH1S 1NTERACT1ON, 1F 1T WERE A SHOW PRODUCED FOR THE UNDERDEVELOPED M1NDS OF W1GGLERS!!! UNFORTUNATELY, WE MUST FACE REAL1TY AND BR1NG 1T THERE OURSELVES.R1DE 1T OUT ALL THE WAY! AH, HOW 1 LOATHE THESE PA1NSTAK1NG TASKS...

vwamp.

and vwhat is the natural conclusion of this interaction?

rudefioh

1 E1THER REJECT YOU OR 1GNORE YOU?UNT1L NEXT T1ME, OF COURSE.AND THE NEXT, AND THE NEXT, AND...

vwamp.

because you are too busy to hang out vwith a friend?

rudefioh

RATHER UNNATURAL HOW TH1CK YOU MUST BE TO NOT P1CK UP ON A H1NT, NOW THAT 1 TH1NK ABOUT 1T.YES, FAR TOO BUSY! PREOCCUP1ED, ONE M1GHT SAY.W1TH... TH1NGS AND SUCH. TH1NGS SUCH AS BE1NG UN1NTERESTED!

vwamp.

vwell, guess i'm a bit boring.

rudefioh

1 WOULDN'T DESCR1BE YOU 1N THAT MANNER!

vwamp.

wvell, then vwhy are you uninterested?

rudefioh

1N HANG1NG OUT? S1MPLY THAT, AND NOTH1NG MORE? AS FR1ENDS?

vwamp.

yup.

rudefioh

1 GUESS 1 AM VERY SUBTLY 1NTERESTED 1N SOMETH1NG ALONG THOSE L1NES SPEC1F1CALLY...

vwamp.

that is vwhy i said hang out rather than anything else.

rudefioh17/09/2018

1 NEVER KNOW HOW TO DEC1PHER YOUR SLY L1TTLE SEDUCT1VE TACT1CS!!!

vwamp.

hmm, no.vwhile i do enjoy these activwities wvith you...vwell.

rudefioh17/09/2018

WHAT?

vwamp.

since you're not really interested, i vwent somewvhere else.i kinda don't vwanna push sex into someone that does not vwant it, feel it?

rudefioh

UNBEL1EVABLE! YOU D1DN'T JUST WA1T AROUND FOR ME TO BE 1NTO YOU AGA1N? UGH, HOW COULD YOU.

vwamp.

i can't tell if you're serious or not.

rudefioh

HMM...ME E1THER!HAHAHAHA. NO, BUT 1'M NOT.ACTUALLY, THAT MAKES ME VERY HAPPY! 1'M GLAD YOU WERE SO EAS1LY ABLE TO MOVE ON. TH1S 1S GREAT NEWS!

vwamp.

right?

rudefioh

1'LL LET M1TUNA KNOW ASAP.

vwamp. 

...vwhat??????wvhy??

rudefioh

OH, R1GHT... NO, 1T WOULD MAKE MUCH MORE SENSE FOR YOU TO TELL H1M!NO, NO... 1T'S L1KELY YOU ALREADY HAVE! AUGH, 1GNORE ME...

vwamp.

???????wvhat the fuck are you talking about.

rudefioh

ER... 1 DON'T KNOW! 1 HAVE NEVER ONCE KNOWN.FORGET 1T! FORGET 1T!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

vwamp.

i don't see vwhat mituna has to do wvith this.

rudefioh

YOUR... FEEL1NGS? M1TUNA HAS NOTH1NG TO DO W1TH YOUR FEEL1NGS OR PERSONAL L1FE?

vwamp.

no?

rudefioh

OR KNOW1NG TH1NGS ABOUT HOW YOU FEEL TOWARDS ME, OR...

vwamp.

i nevwer told him anything.wvhat the fuck, vwhere is this coming from.

rudefioh

1'M NOT SURE ANYMORE, ACTUALLY...1 WASN'T EVEN THAT SURE TO BEG1N W1TH!NOW EVERYTH1NG 1S CONFUS1NG...

vwamp.

listen, i got shitfaced vwith him once and i still didn't tell him anything.like, absolutely gone levwel of drunk.

rudefioh

HOW CAN YOU BE SURE, THEN?

vwamp.

because i recorded it on my phone.

rudefioh

THE... ENT1RE CONVERSAT1ON?

vwamp.

yup.

rudefioh

YOU CREEP! }:P

vwamp.

the entire hang out.it's just so i remember stuff, you're the one thinking of bad shit to do vwith it. ZZ:P but no, did mituna come at you or something?

rudefioh

COME AT ME? NO, 1... WELL, WHAT DO YOU MEAN BY THAT?

vwamp.

asked you about it?

rudefioh

ABOUT THE HANGOUT? NO.

vwamp.

no, about me havwing feelings or something?

rudefioh

UH... 1 DON'T KNOW!SH1T... 1 MEAN, CRUD... 1 MEAN, TH1S... 1 DON'T WANT TO CONT1NUE TALK1NG ABOUT TH1S, 1 D1DN'T KNOW WHAT 1 WAS TALK1NG ABOUT WHEN 1 BROUGHT 1T UP! 1 WAS MAK1NG ASSUMPT1ONS, AND RUNN1NG R1GHT OFF THE RA1LS W1TH MY WORDSPEECH...

vwamp.

or mituna brought something up to you.

rudefioh

NO, 1 DON'T TH1NK THAT HAPPENED.OKAY, MAYBE 1T HAPPENED!!! BUT CLEARLY 1T MEANT NOTH1NG!!!OR, WELL...NO, TH1S 1S BETWEEN YOU AND H1M!

vwamp.

...is that vwhy you twvo vwere hawving a squabble online?oh my god.

rudefioh

1 TRULY DON'T KNOW WHY HE HAS 1T OUT FOR ME!NO!

vwamp.

i didn't do anything and he tried to be meddlesome.and you tried to bite me in the ass for it.

rudefioh

1 WAS HAPPY FOR YOU!!! YOU DON'T EVEN KNOW THE SUBTLET1ES OF TH1S STUP1D S1TUAT1ON.

vwamp.

because you don't say shit? evwer? ewven vwhen it has to do vwith me?actually.

rudefioh

1 SAY PLENTY.

vwamp.

let me stop this here.it doesn't matter.it doesn't matter anyvways.

rudefioh

NO, 1 W1LL R1GHTFULLY EXPLA1N... 1 JUST... EURHGHGHJGHHGG, F1NE THEN!!! YES, JUST LET 1T GO, 1T 1S VERY WORTHLESS.

vwamp.

yeah, in the end it vwon't matter since it's not really anything.

rudefioh

1 GUESS!THROWS ARMS UP!

vwamp.

haha,

rudefioh

1 WAS CAUGHT OFF GUARD BY THE LACK OF COORD1NAT1ON THAT YOU TWO HAVE 1N YOUR 1NTERPERSONAL COMMUN1CAT1ON. YOU CANNOT BLAME ME FOR TH1S CONFUS1ON!HE HAD EXPRESSED TO ME, TH1S... 1 DON'T KNOW, TH1S DES1RE? ON YOUR BEHALF, 1 GUESS? OR BOTH OF OUR BEHALVES??? SOMEHOW???1T MADE ME TH1NK MANY MANY TH1NGS! SO... YES, THAT'S ABOUT THE FULL OF 1T.YOU ARE R1GHT, 1T HARDLY MATTERS. 1'M SORRY FOR THROW1NG YOU 1NTO A T1ZZY!

vwamp.

just to mock this a bit, this is so descreptivwe i had to print it out and use a text marker to be able to not get lost in it.

rudefioh

HUSH!!!

STOP HUSH1NG!!!

SAY MORE TH1NGS!

TH1S CONVERSAT1ON HAS FRUSTRATED ME AND YET 1 REMA1N. WHERE HAS CRONUS GONE??? TH1S "DUDE" OF LOYAL FR1ENDSH1P AND UNDY1NG L1B1DO?NOWHERE TO BE SEEN!!! COULD 1T BE... THAT HE 1S... TURN1NG THE TABLES, AS 1T GOES? FL1PWAYS, EVEN? ON ME???1GNOR1NG ME 1N K1ND... 1 TH1NK 1 WOULD DESERVE THAT. BUT 1 WON'T L1KE 1T! 1 WON'T BE HAPPY ABOUT 1T!!!

vwamp.

hahaha.i just had to feed a grub rufioh.

rudefioh

WELL, 1 AM ST1LL VERY ATTACHED TO TH1S!GRUBS BE DAMNED!!!!!!

vwamp.

no damning of grubs, the population is lowv already.

rudefioh

1S 1T?

vwamp. 

yes.jeez, it's my life's wvork, can't drop it like that.

rudefioh

SAD!YOUR L1FE'S WORK, AND JUST ABOUT EVERY OTHER JADE'S. VERY SPEC1AL!

ANYWAYS, NOW SOMETH1NG MORE 1ND1V1DUAL TO YOU: YOUR RELAT1ONSH1P TO ME!TH1S SUCKS!

vwamp.

hm?vwhat exactly sucks?

rudefioh

TH1S PART OF 1T SPEC1F1CALLY, 1 MEAN... 1T 1S MAK1NG ME QUEST1ON THE 1NTEGR1TY OF OUR FEEL1NGS.ARE WE REALLY FR1ENDS? OR DO WE JUST SAY THAT AS AN EXCUSE TO BE AROUND EACH OTHER??? 1S THAT WHAT FR1ENDSH1P 1S??? JUST BE1NG AROUND SOMEONE BECAUSE YOU W1SH YOU COULD CONNECT TO THEM??? 1S W1SH1NG TO CONNECT BAS1CALLY THE SAME AS CONNECT1NG, 1S THAT ALL 1T TAKES, A S1MPLE DES1RE?1 DON'T KNOW!

vwamp.

are you serious?

like, i'm asking.

rudefioh

DO 1 SOUND S1LLY?

vwamp.

you don't but i nevwer knowv vwhen you're sarcastic, and you kinda said to stop assuming shit.

repeatedly.

rudefioh

1 AM TRY1NG TO BE SER1OUS, MAYBE 1 AM START1NG ON THE WRONG WALKSTUMP HERE...

vwamp.

vwell.assuming you're serious: friendship doesn't take much beyond vwanting a connection, as long as there is respect?and like, just enjoying hanging out.

rudefioh

YEAH, OKAY... 1 AM OVERTH1NK1NG TH1NGS, 1 SUPPOSE...

vwamp.

or vwhatewver you do vwith that person.friendships vwaries.vwhat wvere you thinking? 

if you explain vwe can just solwve stuff rather than one assume from the other vwhich... makes things easier?

like, it's easy both sides knowv vwhat each other means rather than assume.because...i honestly cannot tell vwhen you're serious or not about things, almost like, evwer.

rudefioh

WHAT? WHY NOT?

vwamp. 

because...i don't knowv you?like, i knowv you in the literal sense.

did i use literal right.

but i don't knowv you vwery wvell.

rudefioh

ER... YES, 1 TH1NK... B1BL1CALLY, MAYBE, WOULD ALSO WORK...

vwamp.

so i can't... tell things?like, i'm not telling you TELL ME MORE TH1NGS ABOUT YOURSELF.

rudefioh

1 CAN TELL YOU R1GHT NOW THAT 1'M SER1OUS. AND 1 SUPPOSE THAT 1 COULD RETROACT1VELY ALERT YOU TO MY SER1OUSNESS LEVEL ON ANY PREV1OUS OCCAS1ON, 1F YOU ARE THAT CONCERNED...

vwamp.

but i can only vwork wvith vwhat i knowv and then vwing the rest, you feel me?and vwhat i knowv is like...the bare minimals.

rudefioh

UH...R1GHT!HAVE YOU CONS1DERED THAT THAT'S ALL THERE 1S?

vwamp.

rufioh i think you are more than just a dude that culled horuss, dated me, and makes assorted vweaponry.indeed it is a bit vworrying that i DATED you.and most that i knowv beyond that vwas told to me by someone else.

rudefioh

DATED 1S A STRONG WORD...1 DON'T KNOW WHAT YOU WOULD L1KE ME TO SAY! YES, 1 HAVE MORE. THERE 1S MORE TO ME AS A FULL BE1NG. 1F 1 WOULD L1KE YOU TO ASSUME ANYTH1NG, 1T 1S TH1S.HOW DO 1 PROVE MYSELF AS A PERSON? WHY DO 1 FEEL OBL1GATED TO...?

vwamp.

you're not obligated to.

rudefioh

WOW, 1 WAS JUST LECTUR1NG HORUSS ABOUT TH1S VERY TH1NG...

vwamp.

vwhat i am saying is...you can't expect people to be able to be good friends or close to you if you close yourself to them? it evwen gets in the wvay of communication. like, basic shit communication.

rudefioh

1 DON'T EXPECT THAT OF ANYONE!1... PREFER TO BE ALONE!

vwamp.

vwhy?

rudefioh

1T'S... EASY! EAS1ER. EAS1ER THAN BE1NG W1TH PEOPLE. THEY DON'T UNDERSTAND ME... AND 1 DON'T UNDERSTAND THEM! 1 DON'T CARE TO!1T'S NOT WORTH 1T. MOST PEOPLE ARE TERR1BLE.

vwamp.

did you evwer giwve them a chance to understand you?i bet most people got on your ass about things or most problems you'vwe had actually wvere because people just... don't knowv you.for example if aranea knewv you vwere a reasonable vwilling to conwversate person you vwouldn't get threatened.meenah vwouldn't get so absolutely mad and betrayed vwhen she thought she knewv you and in the end didn't and inevwermind that last part.it is not easier, it's been biting you in the ass the entire time.

rudefioh

1T'S EAS1ER THAN MAK1NG THE EFFORT...

vwamp.

i thought you vwere the tenacious dude.

rudefioh

1 HAVE EVERYONE THAT 1 NEED!WH1CH 1S NOBODY!

vwamp.

then vwhy do you bother talking to others?

rudefioh

TALK1NG TO PEOPLE 1S D1FFERENT THAN HAV1NG THEM.TALK1NG 1S EASY! YOU CAN PUT ON ANY FACE THAT YOU L1KE!

vwamp.

vwhy do you prefer putting a face than being yourself?because you think people might not like you?

rudefioh

NO, BECAUSE 1 KNOW PEOPLE WON'T L1KE ME.AND THAT SOUNDS VERY DEPRESS1NG! BUT 1 HAVE ACCEPTED 1T AND NO LONGER CARE.

vwamp.

...i could like you as a friend. i don't think you're unlikeable.but i'm not obligating you, no pressure.

rudefioh

1, UH... HAVE TAKEN SOME ADV1CE FROM SOME PEOPLE LATELY, HOWEVER! AND A FEW CHANGES WERE ENACTED, TO MAKE ME MORE L1KEABLE, 1 SUPPOSE... OR PERHAPS JUST LESS 1NTENSELY GRAT1NG 1N SOC1AL S1TUAT1ONS.NO, WHEN 1 SA1D THAT 1 FEEL OBL1GATED... 1 D1DN'T MEAN TO 1MPLY THAT YOU WERE PRESSUR1NG ME, JUST THAT 1 WAS OBL1GATED BY MY OWN FEEL1NGS...BUT MY FEEL1NGS ARE EXTREMELY EASY TO 1GNORE! SO DO NOT WORRY.

vwamp.

givwe them a listen, you don't need to make a vwhole essay on wvho you are to people. or you can select a small group of people. ignoring your feelings is no good .once again vwe can try to be legit friends, i'd like to put the effort. i think you are likeable, and havwe some flawvs like anybody else.life isn't... so black and vwhite, i guess.

rudefioh

WELL... 1 DON'T WANT TO G1VE THE... WRONG 1MPRESS1ON! TO CERTA1N ONLOOK1NG PART1ES...

vwamp.

like mituna?

rudefioh

OF THAT VAR1ETY, YES...

vwamp.

i vwill tell him to back off.also uh.i don't dislike you or hate you.for vwhat i knowv or experienced vwith you so far.

rudefioh

WHY DO YOU SUDDENLY ACT AS 1F WE ARE STRANGERS?

vwamp.

vwhat do you mean exactly?

rudefioh

JUST BECAUSE YOU DON'T FEEL AS 1F YOU KNOW MY PERSONAL1TY 1NT1MATELY... 1 DON'T KNOW, 1 FEEL AS 1F YOU ARE D1M1N1SH1NG THE... THE... WHAT WE HAD! WH1CH... 1S WHAT 1 HAVE ALWAYS DONE, 1 GUESS?OH, FORGET 1T. 1 HAVEN'T HAD ONE COHERENT THOUGHT TH1S ENT1RE T1ME.

vwamp.

no, that made sense.you really vwant to knowv vwhy?

rudefioh

YES.

vwamp.

hm.since you alvways did that first.vwhen i openly cared about it.it really did hurt.

rudefioh

}:(

vwamp.

it is not completely your fault since i did also start closing myself off and just.relying on booze to console me or compensate for it and get angry but nevwer really telling i wvas upset.

rudefioh

NO, DO NOT BLAME YOURSELF!  1  NEGLECTED TO NURTURE TH1S RELAT1ONSH1P, 1T WAS MY RESPONS1B1L1TY!

vwamp.

you made me vwery happy.

rudefioh

OH COME ON... YOU'RE JUST TRY1NG TO MAKE ME FEEL BETTER.

vwamp.

no you did.

rudefioh

NO WAY!1 REFUSE TO BEL1EVE TH1S.

vwamp.

at the start at least?

rudefioh17/09/2018

WHAT ABOUT MORE RECENTLY? HOW DO 1 MAKE YOU FEEL RECENTLY?ANYTH1NG AT ALL?

vwamp.

i havwen't figured it out yet. i still think you're someone vworth my time and effort.and i don't vwant things to be bitter betwveen us.

rudefioh

WELL... THAT 1S ALL MUCH MORE THAN 1 COULD ASK FOR. MORE THAN 1 R1GHTFULLY DESERVE! AND 1T TRULY LEAVES ME WONDER1NG... WHAT CUES D1D WE G1VE OFF TO CONV1NCE M1TUNA THAT WE'D BE A FLUSH MADE 1N HEAVEN?

vwamp.

i like your sense of humor.

rudefioh

AH, THANK YOU! 1T'S VERY SUBTLE, 1 L1KE TO TH1NK.

vwamp.

idk. i vwill ask later.and hm.i think this convwersation wvhile complex.made me glad you at least told me this much.

rudefioh

WHAT D1D 1 TELL YOU? }:P

vwamp.

that you ignore your feelings.

so lately? i got positivwe expectations for us as friends.

rudefioh

THAT 1S VERY UPL1FT1NG... 1'M HONORED, 1N A WAY, THAT YOU HAVE SUCH DEEP FA1TH 1N ME.

vwamp.

also glad to knowv you cared for us back there.

rudefioh

1 JUST HOPE 1 AM SAY1NG THE R1GHT TH1NGS...

vwamp.

just say vwhat you feel or felt. those are the right things.

rudefioh

MY FEEL1NGS ARE ALMOST NEVER THE R1GHT TH1NGS!SOC1ALLY, PERSONALLY, ANY S1TUAT1ON...

vwamp.

i don't think that is true rufioh. people can disagree, doesn't mean you're vwrong. but you can take in account and see if vwhat others says makes sense or not.that is friendship, understanding differences vwithout judging so harshly.and explaining things so both sides understands and maybe enter a consensus.for example i agree mituna vwas too nosey.and pushy.and sometimes vwe wvill disagree. but that wvon't mean i think vwowv rufioh is GARBAGE.

rudefioh

YOU CAN'T GUARANTEE THAT! YOU CANNOT MAKE THAT PROM1SE!!!

vwamp.

i can promise to try to understand.there are things you dislike about me.but that does not make us enemies or you hate me.and i can promise that if anything evwer turns out to be an issue. like a real one. i vwill try and talk about it? rather than...do vwhat i do.

rudefioh

THE BOOZ1NG?

vwamp.

fake i'm not upset.

rudefioh

YES, R1GHT...SO WE ARE GETT1NG VERY SER1OUS ABOUT TH1S FR1END TH1NG...

vwamp.

if you vwant to try, that is.

rudefioh

CERTA1NLY!1 M1GHT EVEN PUT MORE EFFORT FORTH HERE THAN 1 EVER HAVE W1TH ANYTH1NG. EVER!1 FEEL SO FOOL1SH FOR BE1NG AFRA1D TO APPROACH YOU. TH1S WORKED OUT SO MUCH 1N MY FAVOR!EVEN THOUGH YOU TECHN1CALLY APPROACHED ME... AND 1 ONLY BROUGH UP THE OFFEND1NG SUBJECT ON ACC1DENT, UNDER THE ASSUMPT1ON THAT YOU WERE AWARE OF 1T...ST1LL!SUCH A SUCCESS.

vwamp.

right?

rudefioh

1 SUPPOSE 1 WAS AFRA1D... THAT THERE WAS AN OUNCE OF TRUTH TO H1S STUP1D MEDDL1NG. TO H1S ACCUSAT1ONS! TRUTH THAT 1 WAS UNAWARE OF SOMEHOW... 1N YOU, OR 1N MYSELF. HOW COULD HE SEE SOMETH1NG THAT WASN'T EX1STENT AT ALL? SURELY THERE HAD TO BE SOME 1ND1CAT1ON, ON SOME END.THEN 1 WAS AFRA1D THAT H1S ACCUSAT1ONS HAD PLANTED SEEDS 1N MY PAN... SOW1NG 1DEAS THERE THAT WOULD L1E DORMANT AND THEN GROW, UNBEKNOWNST TO ME.1 AM VERY 1MPRESS1ONABLE, YOU KNOW!

vwamp.

yeah.and like, evwen if i had feelings i... vwouldn't try anything?

rudefioh

1'M NOT SURE 1F 1 SHOULD BE REASSURED BY THAT...

vwamp.

hm? like, i don't havwe them.

rudefioh

R1GHT!

vwamp.

vwhy are you not sure if you should be reassured or not, though?

rudefioh

YOU ARE A HYPOCR1TE WHO DOESN'T PRACT1CE WHAT HE PREACHES! COMMAND1NG ME TO FEEL OUT MY FEEL1NGS, AND YET...WELL, 1 SUPPOSE YOURS ARE ONLY HYPOTHET1CAL. BUT 1 W1LL BE V1G1LANT! 1 W1LL HOLD YOU TO THE SAME STANDARDS!AS A GOOD FR1END WOULD.}:)

vwamp.

sure.i just feel like evwen if i get feelings for someone i should still be single for a vwhile, it is nothing uh, that deep.

rudefioh

WELL ACT1NG ON FEEL1NGS DOESN'T ALWAYS ENTA1L DAT1NG.BUT 1 AGREE! AND 1 RESPECT THAT 1MMENSELY, PERHAPS TO THE FULLEST DEGREE OF RESPECT THAT 1 AM CAPABLE OF EXPER1ENC1NG.

vwamp.

glad you agree.i vwill need to return to the grubs.so i wvill talk to you later.see you.

[caepaecaesurae]

> Welp

sugaryexcess I sent Ringleader a big rambly opaque romance question and )(e just replied wit)( "ask Cae out"~ T)(at fucking guy sinks )(e knows ebberyfin~ caepaecaesurae WVhat a relateable feeling. So, are you going to?

sugaryexcess )(ey dude, wanna go out wit)( me?~ caepaecaesurae Signs point to yes sugaryexcess Score~ 38P No I told )(im we were already going out and )(e was all "finally" and like... Mind your own business we moved at a perfectly reasonable pace for like, adult people!!!~ caepaecaesurae Considering the delicacy of the situation, I think wve'vwe done our best. sugaryexcess We sure fucking )(ave~ Anyways, )(ow are y'all doing?~ caepaecaesurae I mentioned to Nadaya that I had another lovwer aside from Ringleader, wvho wvas currently secret, and that it wvould not be an easy secret to keep.  He agreed it wvas probably best he not knowv the identity, so he doesn't. sugaryexcess My Kankri knows, becod I'm bad at keeping feelings secrets from )(im~ caepaecaesurae My Kankri can damn wvell see relationships so he probably knowvs there's something, he's just polite enough not to ask. I think he's glad I'm getting out and about more. sugaryexcess T)(at's good!~ caepaecaesurae I find that there's often differences, betwveen wvhat something is called for convwenience and its true nature.  Is that acceptable still? At least for a swveep or twvo until more trolls havwe come around. sugaryexcess Yea)( dude, obviously t)(at's fin~ 38* sugaryexcess I know my rep is super inconvenient to work around~ caepaecaesurae At least I can finally say I lovwe you. sugaryexcess >Hhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh! That's! Gay! >Bury your face in a pillow and scream. It's a good scream. sugaryexcess You could've said so before, love~ But it's always good to )(ear~ 38) caepaecaesurae I could havwe, but it wvould havwe invwited clarification questions and definition-seeking.. sugaryexcess Fuck, I feel like I'm leaving out Cronus, I glub )(im too and bot)( of you toget)(er too~ Truuu~ -Ex)(austing~ caepaecaesurae The comfortable vwagueness of "Friends wvho happen to havwe sex and emotionally support eachother in a wveirdly extensivwe manner" can be useful, at times. caepaecaesurae I'm sure he'll be glad to ear it, either wvhen wve re-fuse or wvhen / if I showv it to him. sugaryexcess "Bffsies and also t)(ere's sex" is t)(e tec)(nical term~ caepaecaesurae BFFsexies? sugaryexcess )(-EY, T)(at's R-EALLY bad and I love it and it's t)(e WORST caepaecaesurae The Orphaner strikes again. sugaryexcess I adore you~ I can't believe you'd use your wordsmit)(ing abilities for evil like t)(is~ 38'( caepaecaesurae I am sorry you ad to find out this wvay. sugaryexcess I )(ad to find out sooner or later~~~ caepaecaesurae Has anyone told you you're beautiful tonight? sugaryexcess No, w)(ic)( is pretty rude of t)(em!~ Are you gonna be tonig)(t's lucky number one?~ caepaecaesurae By implication at the vwery least, shining star. sugaryexcess I appreciate you and ebberyfin you are~ caepaecaesurae And I am mystified but comforted. sugaryexcess I'm deeply mystifying, becod of )(ow complicated yet still entirely flawless I am~ It's baffling~ caepaecaesurae Lovwely to bask in though. sugaryexcess I'm not as good at romantic words and stuff as you are, but I'm yours, and t)(at's gotta be enoug)(~ Anyways~ sugaryexcess I was gonna send you guys c)(ocolate from my last plaice, would sending it t)(roug)( Nadaya work still?~ caepaecaesurae To be honest I'm not entirely certain I'd notice if you did havwe a thousand swveeps of polish at poetry and vwerse.  Knowving you're there is the important thing. caepaecaesurae It wvould